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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..2d3268c --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #60901 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/60901) diff --git a/old/60901-8.txt b/old/60901-8.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 858964d..0000000 --- a/old/60901-8.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,9970 +0,0 @@ -Project Gutenberg's The Vanished Pomps of Yesterday, by Frederic Hamilton - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The Vanished Pomps of Yesterday - Being Some Random Reminiscences of a British Diplomat - -Author: Frederic Hamilton - -Release Date: January 15, 2020 [EBook #60901] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY *** - - - - -Produced by Al Haines - - - - - - - - -THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY - - - - - _By - Lord Frederic Hamilton_ - - THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY - THE DAYS BEFORE YESTERDAY - HERE, THERE AND EVERYWHERE - - _George H. Doran Company - New York_ - - - - - THE VANISHED POMPS - OF YESTERDAY - - BEING - - _Some Random Reminiscences of a - British Diplomat_ - - - BY - LORD FREDERIC HAMILTON - - Author of "Here, There and Everywhere," "The Days - Before Yesterday," etc., etc. - - - - A New and Revised Edition - - - - NEW YORK - GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY - - - - - COPYRIGHT, 1921 - BY GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY - - - - PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA - - - - - TO - EMILY LADY AMPTHILL - MY FIRST CHEFESSE - WITH EVER-GRATEFUL RECOLLECTIONS - OF HER KINDNESS - - - - -FOREWORD - -TO THE SECOND EDITION - -The account of the boating accident at Potsdam on page 75, differs in -several particulars from the story as given in the original edition. -These alterations have been made at the special request of the lady -concerned, who tells me that my recollections of her story were at -fault as regards several important details. There are also a few -verbal alterations in the present edition. - - - - -CONTENTS - -CHAPTER I - -Special Mission to Rome--Berlin in process of transformation--Causes -of Prussian militarism--Lord and Lady Ampthill--Berlin -Society--Music-lovers--Evenings with Wagner--Aristocratic -Waitresses--Rubinstein's rag-time--Liszt's -opinions--Bismarck--Bismarck's classification of -nationalities--Bismarck's sons--Gustav Richter--The Austrian -diplomat--The old Emperor--His defective articulation--Other -Royalties--Beauty of Berlin Palace--Description of interior--The -Luxembourg--"Napoleon III"--Three Court beauties--The pugnacious -Pages--"Making the Circle"--Conversational difficulties--An -ecclesiastical gourmet--The Maharajah's mother - - -CHAPTER II - -Easy-going Austria--Vienna--Charm of town--A little piece of -history--International families--Family -pride--"Schlüssel-Geld"--Excellence of Vienna restaurants--The origin -of "_Croissants_"--Good looks of Viennese women--Strauss's -operettas--A ball in an old Vienna house--Court entertainments--The -Empress Elisabeth--Delightful environs of Vienna--The Berlin Congress -of 1878--Lord Beaconsfield--M. de Blowitz--Treaty telegraphed to -London--Environs of Berlin--Potsdam and its lakes--The bow-oar of the -Embassy "four"--Narrow escape of ex-Kaiser--The Potsdam -palaces--Transfer to Petrograd--Glamour of Russia--An evening with -the Crown Prince at Potsdam - - -CHAPTER III - -The Russian frontier--Frontier police--Disappointment at aspect of -Petrograd--Lord and Lady Dufferin--The British Embassy--St. Isaac's -Cathedral--Beauty of Russian Church-music--The Russian language--The -delightful "Blue-stockings" of Petrograd--Princess Chateau--Pleasant -Russian Society--The Secret Police--The Countess's hurried -journey--The Yacht Club--Russians really Orientals--Their -limitations--The "Intelligenzia"--My Nihilist friends--Their lack of -constructive power--Easter Mass at St. Isaac's--Two comical -incidents--The Easter supper--The red-bearded young Priest--An Empire -built on shifting sand - - -CHAPTER IV - -The Winter Palace--Its interior--Alexander II--A Russian Court -Ball--The "Bals des Palmiers"--The Empress--The blessing of the -Neva--Some curiosities of the Winter Palace--The great Orloff -diamond--My friend the Lady-in-Waiting--Sugared Compensations--The -attempt on the Emperor's life of 1880--Some unexpected finds in the -Palace--A most hilarious funeral--Sporting expeditions--Night drives -through the forest in mid-winter--Wolves--A typical Russian -village--A peasant's house--"Deaf and dumb people"--The inquisitive -peasant youth--Curiosity about strangers--An embarrassing -situation--A still more awkward one--Food difficulties--A bear -hunt--My first bear--Alcoholic consequences--My liking for the -Russian peasant--The beneficent india-rubber Ikon--Two curious -sporting incidents--Village habits--The great gulf between Russian -nobility and peasants - - -CHAPTER V - -The Russian Gipsies--Midnight drives--Gipsy singing--Its -fascination--The consequences of a late night--An unconventional -luncheon--Lord Dufferin's methods--Assassination of Alexander -II--Stürmer--Pathetic incidents in connection with the murder of the -Emperor--The funeral procession and service--Details concerning--The -Votive Church--The Order of the Garter--Unusual incidents at the -Investiture--Precautions taken for Emperor's safety--The Imperial -train--Finland--Exciting salmon-fishing there--Harraka -Niska--Koltesha--Excellent shooting there--Ski-running--"Ringing the -game in"--A wolf-shooting party--The obese General--Some incidents--A -novel form of sport--Black game and capercailzie--At dawn in a -Finnish forest--Immense charm of it--Ice-hilling or "Montagnes -Russes"--Ice-boating on the Gulf of Finland - - -CHAPTER VI - -Love of Russians for children's games--Peculiarities of Petrograd -balls--Some famous beauties of Petrograd Society--The varying garb of -hired waiters--Moscow--Its wonderful beauty--The forest of domes--The -Kremlin--The three famous "Cathedrals"--The Imperial Treasury--The -Sacristy--The Palace--Its splendour--The Terem--A Gargantuan Russian -dinner--An unusual episode at the French Ambassador's -ball--Bombs--Tsarskoe Selo--Its interior--Extraordinary collection of -curiosities in Tsarskoe Park--Origin of term "Vauxhall" for railway -station in Russia--Peterhof--Charm of park there--Two Russian -illusions--A young man of twenty-five delivers an Ultimatum to -Russia--How it came about--M. de Giers--Other Foreign -Ministers--Paraguay--The polite Japanese dentist--A visit to -Gatchina--Description of the Palace--Delights of the children's -playroom there - - -CHAPTER VII - -Lisbon--The two Kings of Portugal, and of Barataria--King Fernando -and the Countess--A Lisbon bull-fight--The "hat-trick"--Courtship -window-parade--The spurred youth of Lisbon--Portuguese -politeness--The De Reszke family--The Opera--Terrible personal -experiences in a circus--The bounding Bishop--Ecclesiastical -possibilities--Portuguese coinage--Beauty of Lisbon--Visits of the -British Fleet--Misguided midshipman--The Legation Whale-boat--"Good -wine needs no bush"--A delightful orange-farm--Cintra--Contrast -between the Past and Present of Portugal - - -CHAPTER VIII - -Brazil--Contrast between Portuguese and Spanish South -America--Moorish traditions--Amazing beauty of Rio de Janeiro--Yellow -fever--The commercial Court Chamberlain--The Emperor Pedro--The -Botanical Gardens of Rio--The quaint diversions of Petropolis--The -liveried young entomologist--Buenos Ayres--The charm of the -"Camp"--Water throwing--A British Minister in Carnival-time--Some -Buenos Ayres peculiarities--Masked balls--Climatic -conditions--Theatres--Restaurants--Wonderful bird-life of the -"Camp"--Estancia Negrete--Duck-shooting--My one flamingo--An -exploring expedition in the Gran Chaco--Hardships--Alligators and -fish--Currency difficulties - - -CHAPTER IX - -Paraguay--Journey up the river--A primitive Capital--Dick the -Australian--His polychrome garb--A Paraguayan Race Meeting--Beautiful -figures of native women--The "Falcon" adventurers--A quaint -railway--Patiño Cué--An extraordinary household--The capable -Australian boy--Wild life in the swamps--"Bushed"--A literary -evening--A railway record--The Tigre midnight -swims--Canada--Maddening flies--A grand salmon-river--The Canadian -backwoods--Skunks and bears--Different views as to industrial progress - - -CHAPTER X - -Former colleagues who have risen to -eminence--Kiderlin-Waechter--Aehrenthal--Colonel Klepsch--The -discomfiture of an inquisitive journalist--Origin of certain Russian -scares--Tokyo--Dulness of Geisha dinners--Japanese culinary -curiosities--"Musical Chairs"--Lack of colour in Japan--The Tokugawa -dynasty--Japanese Gardens--The transplanted suburban Embassy -house--Cherry-blossom--Japanese politeness--An unfortunate incident -in Rome--Eastern courtesy--The country in Japan--An Imperial -duck-catching party--An up-to-date Tokyo house--A Shinto -Temple--Linguistic difficulties at a dinner-party--The economical -colleague--Japan defaced by advertisements - - -CHAPTER XI - -Petrograd through middle-aged eyes--Russians very constant -friends--Russia an Empire of shams--Over-centralisation in -administration--The system hopeless--A complete change of scene--The -West Indies--Trinidad--Personal character of Nicholas II--The weak -point in an Autocracy--The Empress--An opportunity missed--The Great -Collapse--Terrible stories--Love of human beings for ceremonial--Some -personal apologies--Conclusion - - -Index - - - - - THE VANISHED POMPS OF - YESTERDAY - - - - - "Lo, all our Pomp of Yesterday - Is one with Ninevah and Tyre!" - --RUDYARD KIPLING - - - - -{13} - - THE VANISHED POMPS - OF YESTERDAY - - -CHAPTER I - -Special Mission to Rome--Berlin in process of transformation--Causes -of Prussian militarism--Lord and Lady Ampthill--Berlin -Society--Music-lovers--Evenings with Wagner--Aristocratic -Waitresses--Rubinstein's rag-time--Liszt's -opinions--Bismarck--Bismarck's classification of -nationalists--Bismarck's sons--Gustav Richter--The Austrian -diplomat--The old Emperor--His defective articulation--Other -Royalties--Beauty of Berlin Palace--Description of interior--The -Luxembourg--"Napoleon III"--Three Court beauties--The pugnacious -Pages--"Making the Circle"--Conversational difficulties--An -ecclesiastical gourmet--The Maharajah's mother. - - -The tremendous series of events which has changed the face of Europe -since 1914 is so vast in its future possibilities, that certain minor -consequences of the great upheaval have received but scant notice. - -Amongst these minor consequences must be included the disappearance -of the Courts of the three Empires of Eastern Europe, Russia, -Germany, and Austria, with all their glitter and pageantry, their -pomp and brilliant _mise-en-scène_. I will hazard no opinion as to -whether the world is the better for their loss or not; I cannot, -though, help {14} experiencing a feeling of regret that this prosaic, -drab-coloured twentieth century should have definitely lost so strong -an element of the picturesque, and should have permanently severed a -link which bound it to the traditions of the mediæval days of -chivalry and romance, with their glowing colour, their splendid -spectacular displays, and the feeling of continuity with a vanished -past which they inspired. - -A tweed suit and a bowler hat are doubtless more practical for -everyday wear than a doublet and trunk-hose. They are, however, -possibly less picturesque. - -Since, owing to various circumstances, I happen from my very early -days to have seen more of this brave show than has fallen to the lot -of most people, some extracts from my diaries, and a few personal -reminiscences of the three great Courts of Eastern Europe, may prove -of interest. - -Up to my twentieth year I was familiar only with our own Court. I -was then sent to Rome with a Special Mission. As King Victor -Emmanuel had but recently died, there were naturally no Court -entertainments. - -The Quirinal is a fine palace with great stately rooms, but it struck -me then, no doubt erroneously, that the Italian Court did not yet -seem quite at home in their new surroundings, and that there was a -subtle feeling in the air of a lack of continuity somewhere. In the -"'seventies" the House of Savoy had only been established for a very -few years in their new capital. The conditions in Rome {15} had -changed radically, and somehow one felt conscious of this. - -Some ten months later, the ordeal of a competitive examination being -successfully surmounted, I was sent to Berlin as Attaché, at the age -of twenty. - -The Berlin of the "'seventies" was still in a state of transition. -The well-built, prim, dull and somewhat provincial _Residenz_ was -endeavouring with feverish energy to transform itself into a -World-City, a _Welt-Stadt_. The people were still flushed and -intoxicated with victory after victory. In the seven years between -1864 and 1871 Prussia had waged three successful campaigns. The -first, in conjunction with Austria, against unhappy little Denmark in -1864; then followed, in 1866, the "Seven Weeks' War," in which -Austria was speedily brought to her knees by the crushing defeat of -Königgrätz, or Sadowa, as it is variously called, by which Prussia -not only wrested the hegemony of the German Confederation from her -hundred-year-old rival, but definitely excluded Austria from the -Confederation itself. The Hohenzollerns had at length supplanted the -proud House of Hapsburg. Prussia had further virtually conquered -France in the first six weeks of the 1870 campaign, and on the -conclusion of peace found herself the richer by Alsace, half of -Lorraine, and the gigantic war indemnity wrung from France. As a -climax the King of Prussia had, with the consent of the feudatory -princes, been proclaimed German Emperor at Versailles on January 18, -1871, for Bismarck, with all {16} his diplomacy, was unable to -persuade the feudatory kings and princes to acquiesce in the title of -Emperor _of_ Germany for the Prussian King. - -The new Emperor was nominally only _primus Inter Pares_; he was not -to be over-lord. Theoretically the crown of Charlemagne was merely -revived, but the result was that henceforth Prussia would dominate -Germany. This was a sufficient rise for the little State which had -started so modestly in the sandy Mark of Brandenburg (the "sand-box," -as South Germans contemptuously termed it) in the fifteenth century. -To understand the mentality of Prussians, one must realise that -Prussia is the only country _that always made war pay_. She had -risen with marvellous rapidity from her humble beginnings entirely by -the power of the sword. Every campaign had increased her territory, -her wealth, and her influence, and the entire energies of the -Hohenzollern dynasty had been centred on increasing the might of her -army. The Teutonic Knights had wrested East Prussia from the Wends -by the Power of the sword only. They had converted the Wends to -Christianity by annihilating them, and the Prussians inherited the -traditions of the Teutonic Knights. Napoleon, it is true, had -crushed Prussia at Jena, but the latter half of the nineteenth -century was one uninterrupted triumphal progress for her. No wonder -then that every Prussian looked upon warfare as a business -proposition, and an exceedingly paying one at that. Everything about -them had been carefully {17} arranged to foster the same idea. All -the monuments in the Berlin streets were to military heroes. The -marble groups on the Schloss-Brücke represented episodes in the life -of a warrior. The very songs taught the children in the schools were -all militarist in tone: "The Good Comrade," "The Soldier," "The Young -Recruit," "The Prayer during Battle," all familiar to every German -child. When William II, ex-Emperor, found the stately "White Hall" -of the Palace insufficiently gorgeous to accord with his megalomania, -he called in the architect Ihne, and gave directions for a new frieze -round the hall representing "victorious warfare fostering art, -science, trade and industry." I imagine that William in his Dutch -retreat at Amerongen may occasionally reflect on the consequences of -warfare when it is _not_ victorious. Trained in such an atmosphere -from their childhood, drinking in militarism with their earliest -breath, can it be wondered at that Prussians worshipped brute-force, -and brute-force alone? - -Such a nation of heroes must clearly have a capital worthy of them, a -capital second to none, a capital eclipsing Paris and Vienna. -Berliners had always been jealous of Vienna, the traditional -"Kaiser-Stadt." Now Berlin was also a "Kaiser-Stadt," and by the -magnificence of its buildings must throw its older rival completely -into the shade. Paris, too, was the acknowledged centre of European -art, literature, and fashion. Why? The French had proved themselves -a nation of decadents, utterly {18} unable to cope with German might. -The sceptre of Paris should be transferred to Berlin. So building -and renovation began at a feverish rate. - -The open drains which formerly ran down every street in Berlin, -screaming aloud to Heaven during the summer months, were abolished, -and an admirable system of main drainage inaugurated. The appalling -rough cobble-stones, which made it painful even to cross a Berlin -street, were torn up and hastily replaced with asphalte. A French -colleague of mine used to pretend that the cobble-stones had been -designedly chosen as pavement. Berliners were somewhat touchy about -the very sparse traffic in their wide streets. Now one solitary -_droschke_, rumbling heavily over these cobble-stones, produced such -a deafening din that the foreigner was deluded into thinking that the -Berlin traffic rivalled that of London or Paris in its density. - -Berlin is of too recent growth to have any elements of the -picturesque about it. It stands on perfectly flat ground, and its -long, straight streets are terribly wearisome to the eye. Miles and -miles of ornate stucco are apt to become monotonous, even if -decorated with porcelain plaques, glass mosaics, and other -incongruous details dear to the garish soul of the Berliner. In -their rage for modernity, the Municipality destroyed the one -architectural feature of the town. Some remaining eighteenth century -houses had a local peculiarity. The front doors were on the first -floor, and were approached by two steeply inclined planes, locally -known as _die {19} Rampe_. A carriage (with, I imagine, infinite -discomfort to the horses) could just struggle up one of these -_Rampe_, deposit its load, and crawl down again to the street-level. -These inclined planes were nearly all swept away. The _Rampe_ may -have been inconvenient, but they were individual, local and -picturesque. - -I arrived at the age of twenty at this Berlin in active process of -ultra-modernising itself, and in one respect I was most fortunate. - -The then British Ambassador, one of the very ablest men the English -Diplomatic Service has ever possessed, and his wife, Lady Ampthill, -occupied a quite exceptional position. Lord Ampthill was a really -close and trusted friend of Bismarck, who had great faith in his -prescience and in his ability to gauge the probable trend of events, -and he was also immensely liked by the old Emperor William, who had -implicit confidence in him. Under a light and debonair manner the -Ambassador concealed a tremendous reserve of dignity. He was a man, -too, of quick decisions and great strength of character. Lady -Ampthill was a woman of exceptional charm and quick intelligence, -with the social gift developed to its highest point in her. Both the -Ambassador and his wife spoke French, German, and Italian as easily -and as correctly as they did English. The Ambassador was the -_doyen_, or senior member, of the Diplomatic Body, and Lady Ampthill -was the most intimate friend of the Crown Princess, afterwards the -Empress Frederick. - -{20} - -From these varied circumstances, and also from sheer force of -character, Lady Ampthill had become the unchallenged social arbitress -of Berlin, a position never before conceded to any foreigner. As the -French phrase runs, "_Elle faisait la pluie et le beau temps à -Berlin._" - -To a boy of twenty life is very pleasant, and the novel surroundings -and new faces amused me. People were most kind to me, but I soon -made the discovery that many others had made before me, that at the -end of two years one knows Prussians no better than one did at the -end of the first fortnight; that there was some indefinable, -intangible barrier between them and the foreigner that nothing could -surmount. It was not long, too, before I became conscious of the -under-current of intense hostility to my own country prevailing -amongst the "Court Party," or what would now be termed the "Junker" -Party. These people looked upon Russia as their ideal of a Monarchy. -The Emperor of Russia was an acknowledged autocrat; the British -Sovereign a constitutional monarch, or, if the term be preferred, -more or less a figure-head. Tempering their admiration of Russia was -a barely-concealed dread of the potential resources of that mighty -Empire, whose military power was at that period absurdly -overestimated. England did not claim to be a military State, and in -the "'seventies" the vital importance of sea-power was not yet -understood. British statesmen, too, had an unfortunate habit of -indulging in sloppy sentimentalities {21} in their speeches, and the -convinced believers in "Practical Politics" (_Real Politik_) had a -profound contempt (I guard myself from saying an unfounded one) for -sloppiness as well as for sentimentality. - -The Berliners of the "'seventies" had not acquired what the French -term _l'art de vivre_. Prussia, during her rapid evolution from an -insignificant sandy little principality into the leading military -State of Europe, had to practise the most rigid economy. From the -Royal Family downwards, everyone had perforce to live with the -greatest frugality, and the traces of this remained. The "art of -living" as practised in France, England, and even in Austria during -the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries was impossible in Prussia -under the straitened conditions prevailing there, and it is not an -art to be learnt in a day. The small dinner-party, the gathering -together of a few congenial friends, was unknown in Berlin. Local -magnates gave occasionally great dinner-parties of thirty guests or -so, at the grotesque hour of 5 p.m. It seemed almost immoral to -array oneself in a white tie and swallow-tail coat at four in the -afternoon. The dinners on these occasions were all sent in from the -big restaurants, and there was no display of plate, and never a -single flower. As a German friend (probably a fervent believer in -"Practical Politics") said to me, "The best ornament of a -dinner-table is also good food"; nor did the conversation atone by -its brilliancy for the lack of the dainty trimmings which {22} the -taste of Western Europe expects on these occasions. A never-failing -topic of conversation was to guess the particular restaurant which -had furnished the banquet. One connoisseur would pretend to detect -"Hiller" in the soup; another was convinced that the fish could only -have been dressed by "Poppenberg." As soon as we had swallowed our -coffee, we were expected to make our bows and take our leave without -any post-prandial conversation whatever, and at 7 p.m. too! - -Thirty people were gathered together to eat, _weiter nichts_, and, to -do them justice, most of them fulfilled admirably the object with -which they had been invited. The houses, too, were so ugly. No -_objets d'art_, no personal belongings whatever, and no flowers. The -rooms might have been in an hotel, and the occupant of the rooms -might have arrived overnight with one small modest suit-case as his, -or her, sole baggage. There was no individuality whatever about the -ordinary Berlin house, or _appartement_. - -I can never remember having heard literature discussed in any form -whatever at Berlin. For some reason the novelist has never taken -root in Germany. The number of good German novelists could be -counted on the fingers of both hands, and no one seemed interested in -literary topics. It was otherwise with music. Every German is a -genuine music-lover, and the greatest music-lover of them all was -Baroness von Schleinitz, wife of the Minister of the Royal Household. -Hers was {23} a charming house, the stately eighteenth century -_Haus-Ministerium_, with its ornate rococo _Fest-Saal_. In that -somewhat over-decorated hall every great musician in Europe must have -played at some time or other. Baron von Schleinitz was, I think, the -handsomest old man I have ever seen, with delightful old-world -manners. It was a privilege to be asked to Madame de Schleinitz's -musical evenings. She seldom asked more than forty people, and the -most rigid silence was insisted upon; still every noted musician -passing through Berlin went to her house as a matter of course. At -the time of my arrival from England, Madame de Schleinitz had struck -up a great alliance with Wagner, and gave two musical evenings a week -as a sort of propaganda, in order to familiarise Berlin amateurs with -the music of the "Ring." At that time the stupendous Tetralogy had -only been given at Bayreuth and in Munich; indeed I am not sure that -it had then been performed in its entirety in the Bavarian capital. - -In the _Fest-Saal_, with its involved and tortured rococo curves, two -grand pianos were placed side by side, a point Wagner insisted upon, -and here the Master played us his gigantic work. The way Wagner -managed to make the piano suggest brass, strings, or wood-wind at -will was really wonderful. I think that we were all a little puzzled -by the music of the "Ring"; possibly our ears had not then been -sufficiently trained to grasp the amazing beauty of such a subtle web -of harmonies. His {24} playing finished, a small, very -plainly-appointed supper-table was placed in the middle of the -_Fest-Saal_, at which Wagner seated himself alone in state. Then the -long-wished-for moment began for his feminine adorers. The great -ladies of Berlin would allow no one to wait on the Master but -themselves, and the bearers of the oldest and proudest names in -Prussia bustled about with prodigious fussing, carrying plates of -sauerkraut, liver sausage, black puddings, and herring-salad, -colliding with each other, but in spite of that managing to heap the -supper-table with more Teutonic delicacies than even Wagner's very -ample appetite could assimilate. - -I fear that not one of these great ladies would have found it easy to -obtain a permanent engagement as waitress in a restaurant, for their -skill in handling dishes and plates was hardly commensurate with -their zeal. In justice it must be added that the professional -waitress would not be encumbered with the long and heavy train of -evening dresses in the "'seventies." These great ladies, anxious to -display their intimate knowledge of the Master's tastes, bickered -considerably amongst themselves. "Surely, dear Countess, you know by -now that the Master never touches white bread." - -"Dearest Princess, Limburger cheese is the only sort the Master cares -for. You had better take that Gruyère cheese away"; whilst an -extremely attractive little Countess, the bearer of a great German -name, would trip vaguely about, announcing to the world that "The -Master thinks that he could {25} eat two more black puddings. Where -do you imagine that I could find them?" - -Meanwhile from another quarter one would hear an eager "Dearest -Princess, could you manage to get some raw ham? The Master thinks -that he would like some, or else some raw smoked goose-breast." -"_Aber, allerliebste Gräfin, wissen Sie nicht dass der Meister trinkt -nur dunkles Bier?_" would come as a pathetic protest from some -slighted worshipper who had been herself reproved for ignorance of -the Master's gastronomic tastes. - -It must regretfully be confessed that these tastes were rather gross. -Meanwhile Wagner, dressed in a frock-coat and trousers of shiny black -cloth, his head covered with his invariable black velvet skull-cap, -would munch steadily away, taking no notice whatever of those around -him. - -The rest of us stood at a respectful distance, watching with a -certain awe this marvellous weaver of harmonies assimilating copious -nourishment. For us it was a sort of Barmecide's feast, for beyond -the sight of Wagner at supper, we had no refreshments of any sort -offered to us. - -Soon afterwards Rubinstein, on his way to St. Petersburg, played at -Madame de Schleinitz's house. Having learnt that Wagner always made -a point of having two grand pianos side by side when he played, -Rubinstein also insisted on having two. To my mind, Rubinstein -absolutely ruined the effect of all his own compositions by the -tremendous pace at which he played them. It was as {26} though he -were longing to be through with the whole thing. His "Melody in F," -familiar to every school-girl, he took at such a pace that I really -believe the virulent germ which forty years afterwards was to develop -into Rag-time, and to conquer the whole world with its maddening -syncopated strains, came into being that very night, and was evoked -by Rubinstein himself out of his own long-suffering "Melody in F." - -Our Ambassador, himself an excellent musician, was an almost lifelong -friend of Liszt. Wagner's wife, by the way, was Lizst's daughter, -and had been previously married to Hans von Bulow, the pianist. -Liszt, when passing through Berlin, always dined at our Embassy and -played to us afterwards. I remember well Lord Ampthill asking Liszt -where he placed Rubinstein as a pianist. "Rubinstein is, without any -question whatever, the first pianist in the world," answered Liszt -without hesitation. "But you are forgetting yourself, Abbé," -suggested the Ambassador. "Ich," said Liszt, striking his chest, -"Ich bin der einzige Pianist der Welt" ("I; I am the only pianist in -the world"). There was a superb arrogance about this perfectly -justifiable assertion which pleased me enormously at the time, and -pleases me still after the lapse of so many years. - -Bismarck was a frequent visitor at our Embassy, and was fond of -dropping in informally in the evening. Apart from his liking for our -Ambassador, he had a great belief in his judgment and {27} -discretion. Lady Ampthill, too, was one of the few women Bismarck -respected and really liked. I think he had a great admiration for -her intellectual powers and quick sense of intuition. - -It is perhaps superfluous to state that no man living now occupies -the position Bismarck filled in the "'seventies." The maker of -Modern Germany was the unchallenged dictator of Europe. He was -always very civil to the junior members of the Embassy. I think it -pleased him that we all spoke German fluently, for the acknowledged -supremacy of the French language as a means of communication between -educated persons of different nationalities was always a very sore -point with him. It must be remembered that Prussia herself had only -comparatively recently been released from the thraldom of the French -language. Frederick the Great always addressed his _entourage_ in -French. After 1870-71, Bismarck ordered the German Foreign Office to -reply in the German language to all communications from the French -Embassy. He followed the same procedure with the Russian Embassy; -whereupon the Russian Ambassador countered with a long despatch -written in Russian to the Wilhelmstrasse. He received no reply to -this, and mentioned that fact to Bismarck about a fortnight later. -"Ah!" said Bismarck reflectively, "now that your Excellency mentions -it, I think we did receive a despatch in some unknown tongue. I -ordered it to be put carefully away until we could procure the -services of an expert to decipher {28} it. I hope to be able to find -such an expert in the course of the next three or four months, and -can only trust that the matter was not a very pressing one." - -The Ambassador took the hint, and that was the last note in Russian -that reached the Wilhelmstrasse. - -We ourselves always wrote in English, receiving replies in German, -written in the third person, in the curiously cumbrous Prussian -official style. - -Bismarck was very fond of enlarging on his favourite theory of the -male and female European nations. The Germans themselves, the three -Scandinavian peoples, the Dutch, the English proper, the Scotch, the -Hungarians and the Turks, he declared to be essentially male races. -The Russians, the Poles, the Bohemians, and indeed every Slavonic -people, and all Celts, he maintained, just as emphatically, to be -female races. A female race he ungallantly defined as one given to -immense verbosity, to fickleness, and to lack of tenacity. He -conceded to these feminine races some of the advantages of their sex, -and acknowledged that they had great powers of attraction and charm, -when they chose to exert them, and also a fluency of speech denied to -the more virile nations. He maintained stoutly that it was quite -useless to expect efficiency in any form from one of the female -races, and he was full of contempt for the Celt and the Slav. He -contended that the most interesting nations were the epicene ones, -partaking, that is, {29} of the characteristics of both sexes, and he -instanced France and Italy, intensely virile in the North, absolutely -female in the South; maintaining that the Northern French had saved -their country times out of number from the follies of the -"Méridionaux." He attributed the efficiency of the Frenchmen of the -North to the fact that they had so large a proportion of Frankish and -Norman blood in their veins, the Franks being a Germanic tribe, and -the Normans, as their name implied, Northmen of Scandinavian, -therefore also of Teutonic, origin. He declared that the fair-haired -Piedmontese were the driving power of Italy, and that they owed their -initiative to their descent from the Germanic hordes who invaded -Italy under Alaric in the fifth century. Bismarck stoutly maintained -that efficiency, wherever it was found, was due to Teutonic blood; a -statement with which I will not quarrel. - -As the inventor of "Practical Politics" (_Real-Politik_), Bismarck -had a supreme contempt for fluent talkers and for words, saying that -only fools could imagine that facts could be talked away. He -cynically added that words were sometimes useful for "papering over -structural cracks" when they had to be concealed for a time. - -With his intensely overbearing disposition, Bismarck could not brook -the smallest contradiction, or any criticism whatever. I have often -watched him in the Reichstag--then housed in a very modest -building--whilst being attacked, especially by Liebknecht the -Socialist. He made no effort to {30} conceal his anger, and would -stab the blotting-pad before him viciously with a metal paper-cutter, -his face purple with rage. - -Bismarck himself was a very clear and forcible speaker, with a happy -knack of coining felicitous phrases. - -His eldest son, Herbert Bismarck, inherited all his father's -arrogance and intensely overweening disposition, without one spark of -his father's genius. He was not a popular man. - -The second son, William, universally known as "Bill," was a genial, -fair-headed giant of a man, as generally popular as his elder brother -was the reverse. Bill Bismarck (the juxtaposition of these two names -always struck me as being comically incongruous) drank so much beer -that his hands were always wet and clammy. He told me himself that -he always had three bottles of beer placed by his bedside lest he -should be thirsty in the night. He did not live long. - -Moltke, the silent, clean-shaved, spare old man with the sphinx-like -face, who had himself worked out every detail of the Franco-Prussian -War long before it materialised, was an occasional visitor at our -Embassy, as was Gustav Richter, the fashionable Jewish artist. -Richter's paintings, though now sneered at as _Chocolade-Malerei_ -(chocolate-box painting), had an enormous vogue in the "'seventies," -and were reproduced by the hundred thousand. His picture of Queen -Louise of Prussia, engravings of which are scattered all over the -world, {31} is only a fancy portrait, as Queen Louise had died before -Richter was born. He had Rauch's beautiful effigy of the Queen in -the mausoleum at Charlottenburg to guide him, but the actual model -was, I believe, a member of the _corps de ballet_ at the Opera. -Madame Richter was the daughter of Mendelssohn the composer, and -there was much speculation in Berlin as to the wonderful artistic -temperament the children of such a union would inherit. As a matter -of fact, I fancy that none of the young Richters showed any artistic -gifts whatever. - -Our Embassy was a very fine building. The German railway magnate -Strousberg had erected it as his own residence, but as he most -tactfully went bankrupt just as the house was completed, the British -Government was able to buy it at a very low figure indeed, and to -convert it into an Embassy. Though a little ornate, it was admirably -adapted for this purpose, having nine reception rooms, including a -huge ball-room, all communicating with each other, on the ground -floor. The "Chancery," as the offices of an Embassy are termed, was -in another building on the Pariser Platz. This was done to avoid the -constant stream of people on business, of applicants of various -sorts, including "D.B.S.'s" (Distressed British Subjects), -continually passing through the Embassy. Immediately opposite our -"Chancery," in the same building, and only separated from it by a -_porte-cochère_, was the Chancery of the Austro-Hungarian Embassy. - -{32} - -Count W----, the Councillor of the Austrian Embassy, was very deaf, -and had entirely lost the power of regulating his voice. He -habitually shouted in a quarter-deck voice, audible several hundred -yards away. - -I was at work in the Chancery one day when I heard a stupendous din -arising from the Austrian Chancery. "The Imperial Chancellor told -me," thundered this megaphone voice in stentorian German tones, every -word of which must have been distinctly heard in the street, "that -under no circumstances whatever would Germany consent to this -arrangement. If the proposal is pressed, Germany will resist it to -the utmost, if necessary by force of arms. The Chancellor, in giving -me this information," went on the strident voice, "impressed upon me -how absolutely secret the matter must be kept. I need hardly inform -your Excellency that this telegram is confidential to the highest -degree." - -"What is that appalling noise in the Austrian Chancery?" I asked our -white-headed old Chancery servant. - -"That is Count W---- dictating a cypher telegram to Vienna," answered -the old man with a twinkle in his shrewd eyes. - -This little episode has always seemed to me curiously typical of -Austro-Hungarian methods. - -The central figure of Berlin was of course the old Emperor William. -This splendid-looking old man may not have been an intellectual -giant, but he {33} certainly looked an Emperor, every inch of him. -There was something, too, very taking in his kindly old face and -genial manner. The Crown Princess, afterwards the Empress Frederick, -being a British Princess, we were what is known in diplomatic -parlance as "une ambassade de famille." The entire staff of the -Embassy was asked to dine at the Palace on the birthdays both of -Queen Victoria and of the Crown Princess. These dinners took place -at the unholy hour of 5 p.m., in full uniform, at the Emperor's ugly -palace on the Linden, the Old Schloss being only used for more formal -entertainments. On these occasions the sole table decoration -consisted, quaintly enough, of rows of gigantic silver dish-covers, -each surmounted by the Prussian eagle, with nothing under them, -running down the middle of the table. The old Emperor had been but -indifferently handled by his dentist. It had become necessary to -supplement Nature's handiwork by art, but so unskilfully had these, -what are euphemistically termed, additions to the Emperor's mouth -been contrived, that his articulation was very defective. It was -almost impossible to hear what he said, or indeed to make out in what -language he was addressing you. When the Emperor "made the circle," -one strained one's ears to the utmost to obtain a glimmering of what -he was saying. If one detected an unmistakably Teutonic guttural, -one drew a bow at a venture, and murmured "_Zu Befehl Majestät_," -trusting that it might fit in. Should one catch, on the other hand, -a slight {34} suspicion of a nasal "n," one imagined that the -language must be French, and interpolated a tentative "_Parfaitement, -Sire_," trusting blindly to a kind Providence. Still the impression -remains of a kindly and very dignified old gentleman, filling his -part admirably. The Empress Augusta, who had been beautiful in her -youth, could not resign herself to growing old gracefully. She would -have made a most charming old lady, but though well over seventy -then, she was ill-advised enough to attempt to rejuvenate herself -with a chestnut wig and an elaborate make-up, with deplorable -results. The Empress, in addition, was afflicted with a slight palsy -of the head. - -The really magnificent figure was the Crown Prince, afterwards the -Emperor Frederick. Immensely tall, with a full golden beard, he -looked in his white Cuirassier uniform the living embodiment of a -German legendary hero; a Lohengrin in real life. - -Princess Frederick Charles of Prussia was a strikingly handsome woman -too, though unfortunately nearly stone deaf. - -Though the palace on the Linden may have been commonplace and ugly, -the Old Schloss has to my mind the finest interior in Europe. It may -lack the endless, bare, gigantic halls of the Winter Palace in -Petrograd, and it may contain fewer rooms than the great rambling -Hofburg in Vienna, but I maintain that, with the possible exception -of the Palace in Madrid, no building in Europe {35} can compare -internally with the Old Schloss in Berlin. I think the effect the -Berlin palace produces on the stranger is due to the series of rooms -which must be traversed before the State apartments proper are -reached. These rooms, of moderate dimensions, are very richly -decorated. Their painted ceilings, encased in richly-gilt "coffered" -work in high relief, have a Venetian effect, recalling some of the -rooms in the Doge's Palace in the sea-girt city of the Adriatic. -Their silk-hung walls, their pictures, and the splendid pieces of old -furniture they contain, redeem these rooms from the soulless, -impersonal look most palaces wear. They recall the rooms in some of -the finer English or French country-houses, although no private house -would have them in the same number. The rooms that dwell in my -memory out of the dozen or so that formed the _enfilade_ are, first, -the "Drap d'Or Kammer," with its droll hybrid appellation, the walls -of which were hung, as its name implies, with cloth of gold; then the -"Red Eagle Room," with its furniture and mirrors of carved wood, -covered with thin plates of beaten silver, producing an indescribably -rich effect, and the "Red Velvet" room. This latter had its walls -hung with red velvet bordered by broad bands of silver lace, and -contained some splendid old gilt furniture. - -The Throne room was one of the most sumptuous in the world. It had -an arched painted ceiling, from which depended some beautiful old -chandeliers of cut rock crystal, and the walls, which framed {36} -great panels of Gobelin tapestry of the best period, were highly -decorated, in florid rococo style, with pilasters and carved groups -representing the four quarters of the world. The whole of the wall -surface was gilded; carvings, mouldings, and pilasters forming one -unbroken sheet of gold. We were always told that the musicians' -gallery was of solid silver, and that it formed part of Frederick the -Great's war-chest. As a matter of fact, Frederick had himself melted -the original gallery down and converted it into cash for one of his -campaigns. By his orders, a facsimile gallery was carved of wood -heavily silvered over. The effect produced, however, was the same, -as we were hardly in a position to scrutinise the hall-mark. The -room contained four semi-circular buffets, rising in diminishing -tiers, loaded with the finest specimens the Prussian Crown possessed -of old German silver-gilt drinking-cups of Nuremberg and Augsburg -workmanship of the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries. - -When the Throne room was lighted up at night the glowing colours of -the Gobelin tapestry and the sheen of the great expanses of gold and -silver produced an effect of immense splendour. With the possible -exception of the Salle des Fêtes in the Luxembourg Palace in Paris, -it was certainly the finest Throne room in Europe. - -The first time I saw the Luxembourg hall was as a child of seven, -under the Second Empire, when I was absolutely awe-struck by its -magnificence. It then contained Napoleon the Third's throne, and -{37} was known as the "Salle du Trône." A relation pointed out to me -that the covering and curtains of the throne, instead of being of the -stereotyped crimson velvet, were of purple velvet, all spangled with -the golden bees of the Bonapartes. The Luxembourg hall had then in -the four corners of the coved ceiling an ornament very dear to the -meretricious but effective taste of the Second Empire. Four immense -globes of sky-blue enamel supported four huge gilt Napoleonic eagles -with outspread wings. To the crude taste of a child the purple -velvet of the throne, powdered with golden bees, and the gilt eagles -on their turquoise globes, appeared splendidly sumptuous. Of course -after 1870 all traces of throne and eagles were removed, as well as -the countless "N. III's" with which the walls were plentifully -besprinkled. - -What an astute move of Louis Napoleon's it was to term himself the -"Third," counting the poor little "Aiglon," the King of Rome, as the -second of the line, and thus giving a look of continuity and -stability to a brand-new dynasty! Some people say that the -assumption of this title was due to an accident, arising out of a -printer's error. After his _coup d'état_, Louis Napoleon issued a -proclamation to the French people, ending "Vive Napoleon!!!" The -printer, mistaking the three notes of exclamation for the numeral -III, set up "Vive Napoleon III." The proclamation appeared in this -form, and Louis Napoleon, at once recognising the advantages of it, -adhered to the style. {38} Whether this is true or not I cannot say. -I was then too young to be able to judge for myself, but older people -have told me that the mushroom Court of the Tuileries eclipsed all -others in Europe in splendour. The _parvenu_ dynasty needed all the -aid it could derive from gorgeous ceremonial pomp to maintain its -position successfully. - -To return to Berlin, beyond the Throne room lay the fine picture -gallery, nearly 200 feet long. At Court entertainments all the -German officers gathered in this picture gallery and made a living -hedge, between the ranks of which the guests passed on their way to -the famous "White Hall." These long ranks of men in their -resplendent _Hofballanzug_ were really a magnificent sight, and -whoever first devised this most effective bit of stage-management -deserves great credit. - -The White Hall as I knew it was a splendidly dignified room. As its -name implies, it was entirely white, the mouldings all being silvered -instead of gilt. Both Germans and Russians are fond of substituting -silvering for gilding. Personally I think it most effective, but as -the French with their impeccable good taste never employ silvering, -there must be some sound artistic reason against its use. - -It must be reluctantly confessed that the show of feminine beauty at -Berlin was hardly on a level with the perfect _mise-en-scène_. There -were three or four very beautiful women. Countess Karolyi, the -Austrian Ambassadress, herself a Hungarian, was a tall, graceful -blonde with beautiful hair; she {39} was full of infinite attraction. -Princess William Radziwill, a Russian, was, I think, the loveliest -human being I have ever seen; she was, however, much dreaded on -account of her mordant tongue. Princess Carolath-Beuthen, a -Prussian, had first seen the light some years earlier than these two -ladies. She was still a very beautiful woman, and eventually married -as her second husband Count Herbert Bismarck, the Iron Chancellor's -eldest son. - -There was, unfortunately, a very wide gap between the looks of these -"stars" and those of the rest of the company. - -The interior of the Berlin Schloss put Buckingham Palace completely -in the shade. The London palace was unfortunately decorated in the -"fifties," during the _époque de mauvais goût_, as the French -comprehensively term the whole period between 1820 and 1880, and it -bears the date written on every unfortunate detail of its decoration. -It is beyond any question whatever the product of the "period of bad -taste." I missed, though, in Berlin the wealth of flowers which -turns Buckingham Palace into a garden on Court Ball nights. -Civilians too in London have to appear at Court in knee-breeches and -stockings; in Berlin trousers were worn, thus destroying the -_habillé_ look. As regards the display of jewels and the beauty of -the women at the two Courts, Berlin was simply nowhere. German -uniforms were of every colour of the rainbow; with us there is an -undue predominance of scarlet, so that the kaleidoscopic effect of -Berlin was never {40} attained in London, added to which too much -scarlet and gold tends to kill the effect of the ladies' dresses. - -At the Prussian Court on these State occasions an immense number of -pages made their appearance. I myself had been a Court page in my -youth, but whereas in England little boys were always chosen for this -part, in Berlin the tallest and biggest lads were selected from the -Cadet School at Lichterfelde. A great lanky gawk six feet high, with -an incipient moustache, does not show up to advantage in lace -ruffles, with his thin spindle-shanks encased in silk stockings; a -page's trappings being only suitable for little boys. I remember -well the day when I and my fellow-novice were summoned to try on our -new page's uniforms. Our white satin knee-breeches and -gold-embroidered white satin waistcoats left us quite cold, but we -were both enchanted with the little pages' swords, in their -white-enamelled scabbards, which the tailor had brought with him. We -had neither of us ever possessed a real sword of our own before, and -the steel blades were of the most inviting sharpness. We agreed that -the opportunity was too good a one to be lost, so we determined to -slip out into the garden in our new finery and there engage in a -deadly duel. It was further agreed to thrust really hard with the -keen little blades, "just to see what would happen." Fortunately for -us, we had been overheard. We reached the garden, and, having found -a conveniently secluded spot, had just {41} commenced to make those -vague flourishes with our unaccustomed weapons which our experience, -derived from pictures, led us to believe formed the orthodox -preliminaries to a duel, when the combat was sternly interrupted. -Otherwise there would probably have been vacancies for one if not two -fresh Pages of Honour before nightfall. What a pity there were no -"movies" in those days! What a splendid film could have been made of -two small boys, arrayed in all the bravery of silk stockings, white -satin breeches, and lace ruffles, their red tunics heavy with bullion -embroidery, engaged in a furious duel in a big garden. When the news -of our escapade reached the ears of the highest quarters, preemptory -orders were issued to have the steel blades removed from our swords -and replaced with innocuous pieces of shaped wood. It was very -ignominious; still the little swords made a brave show, and no one by -looking at them could guess that the white scabbards shielded nothing -more deadly than an inoffensive piece of oak. A page's sword, by the -way, is not worn at the left side in the ordinary manner, but is -passed through two slits in the tunic, and is carried in the small of -the back, so that the boy can keep his hands entirely free. - -The "White Hall" has a splendid inlaid parquet floor, with a crowned -Prussian eagle in the centre of it. This eagle was a source of -immense pride to the palace attendants, who kept it in a high state -of polish. As a result the eagle was as slippery as ice, and woe -betide the unfortunate dancer {42} who set his foot on it. He was -almost certain to fall; and to fall down at a Berlin State ball was -an unpardonable offence. If a German officer, the delinquent had his -name struck off the list of those invited for a whole year. If a -member of the Corps Diplomatique, he received strong hints to avoid -dancing again. Certainly the diplomats were sumptuously entertained -at supper at the Berlin Palace; whether the general public fared as -well I do not know. - -Urbain, the old Emperor William's French chef, who was responsible -for these admirable suppers, had published several cookery books in -French, on the title-page of which he described himself as "Urbain, -premier officier de bouche de S.M. l'Empereur d'Allemagne." This -quaint-sounding title was historically quite correct, it being the -official appellation of the head cooks of the old French kings. A -feature of the Berlin State balls was the stirrup-cup of hot punch -given to departing guests. Knowing people hurried to the grand -staircase at the conclusion of the entertainment; here servants -proffered trays of this delectable compound. It was concocted, I -believe, of equal parts of arrack and rum, with various other unknown -ingredients. In the same way, at Buckingham Palace in Queen -Victoria's time, wise persons always asked for hock cup. This was -compounded of very old hock and curious liqueurs, from a -hundred-year-old recipe. A truly admirable beverage! Now, alas! -since Queen Victoria's day, only a memory. - -{43} - -The Princesses of the House of Prussia had one ordeal to face should -they become betrothed to a member of the Royal Family of any other -country. They took leave formally of the diplomats at the Palace, -"making the circle" by themselves. I have always understood that -Prussian princesses were trained for this from their childhood by -being placed in the centre of a circle of twenty chairs, and being -made to address some non-committal remark to each chair in turn, in -German, French, and English. I remember well Princess Louise -Margaret of Prussia, afterwards our own Duchess of Connaught, who was -to become so extraordinarily popular not only in England but in India -and Canada as well, making her farewell at Berlin on her betrothal. -She "made the circle" of some forty people, addressing a remark or -two to each, entirely alone, save for two of the great long, gawky -Prussian pages in attendance on her, looking in their red tunics for -all the world like London-grown geraniums--all stalk and no leaves. -It is a terribly trying ordeal for a girl of eighteen, and the -Duchess once told me that she nearly fainted from sheer nervousness -at the time, although she did not show it in the least. - -If I may be permitted a somewhat lengthy digression, I would say that -it is at times extremely difficult to find topics of conversation. -Years afterwards, when I was stationed at our Lisbon Legation, the -Papal Nuncio was very tenacious of his dignity. In Catholic -countries the Nuncio is _ex officio_ head {44} of the Diplomatic -Body, and the Nuncio at Lisbon expected every diplomat to call on him -at least six times a year. On his reception days the Nuncio always -arrayed himself in his purple robes and a lace cotta, with his great -pectoral emerald cross over it. He then seated himself in state in a -huge carved chair, with a young priest as aide-de-camp, standing -motionless behind him. It was always my ill-fortune to find the -Nuncio alone. Now what possible topic of conversation could I, a -Protestant, find with which to fill the necessary ten minutes with an -Italian Archbishop _in partibus_. We could not well discuss the -latest fashions in copes, or any impending changes in the College of -Cardinals. Most providentally, I learnt that this admirable -ecclesiastic, so far from despising the pleasures of the table, made -them his principal interest in life. I know no more of the -intricacies of the Italian _cuisine_ than Melchizedek knew about -frying sausages, but I had a friend, the wife of an Italian -colleague, deeply versed in the mysteries of Tuscan cooking. This -kindly lady wrote me out in French some of the choicest recipes in -her extensive _répertoire_, and I learnt them all off by heart. -After that I was the Nuncio's most welcome visitor. We argued hotly -over the respective merits of _risotto alia Milanese_ and _risotto al -Salto_. We discussed _gnocchi_, _pasta asciutta_, and novel methods -of preparing _minestra_, I trust without undue partisan heat, until -the excellent prelate's eyes gleamed and his mouth began to water. -Donna Maria, my Italian friend, proved an {45} inexhaustible mine of -recipes. She always produced new ones, which I memorised, and -occasionally wrote out for the Nuncio, sometimes, with all the valour -of ignorance, adding a fancy ingredient or two on my own account. On -one occasion, after I had detailed the constituent parts of an -extraordinarily succulent composition of rice, cheese, oil, -mushrooms, chestnuts, and tomatoes, the Nuncio nearly burst into -tears with emotion, and I feel convinced that, heretic though I might -be, he was fully intending to give me his Apostolic benediction, had -not the watchful young priest checked him. I felt rewarded for my -trouble when my chief, the British Minister, informed me that the -Nuncio considered me the most intelligent young man he knew. He -added further that he enjoyed my visits, as my conversation was so -interesting. - -The other occasion on which I experienced great conversational -difficulties was in Northern India at the house of a most popular and -sporting Maharajah. His mother, the old Maharani, having just -completed her seventy-first year, had emerged from the seclusion of -the zenana, where she had spent fifty-five years of her life, or, in -Eastern parlance, had "come from behind the curtain." We paid short -ceremonial visits at intervals to the old lady, who sat amid piles of -cushions, a little brown, shrivelled, mummy-like figure, so swathed -in brocades and gold tissue as to be almost invisible. The Maharajah -was most anxious that I should talk to his mother, but what possible -subject of conversation {46} could I find with an old lady who had -spent fifty-five years in the pillared (and somewhat uncleanly) -seclusions of the zenana? Added to which the Maharani knew no Urdu, -but only spoke Bengali, a language of which I am ignorant. This -entailed the services of an interpreter, always an embarrassing -appendage. On occasions of this sort Morier's delightful book _Hadji -Baba_ is invaluable, for the author gives literal English -translations of all the most flowery Persian compliments. Had the -Maharani been a Mohammedan, I could have addressed her as "Oh -moon-faced ravisher of hearts! I trust that you are reposing under -the canopy of a sound brain!" Being a Hindoo, however, she would not -be familiar with Persian forms of politeness. A few remarks on lawn -tennis, or the increasing price of polo ponies, would obviously fail -to interest her. You could not well discuss fashions with an old -lady who had found one single garment sufficient for her needs all -her days, and any questions as to details of her life in the zenana, -or that of the other inmates of that retreat, would have been -indecorous in the highest degree. Nothing then remained but to -remark that the Maharajah was looking remarkably well, but that he -had unquestionably put on a great deal of weight since I had last -seen him. I received the startling reply from the interpreter -(delivered in the clipped, staccato tones most natives of India -assume when they speak English), "Her Highness says that, thanks to -God, and to his mother's cooking, her son's belly is increasing -indeed to vast size." - -{47} - -Bearing in mind these later conversational difficulties, I cannot but -admire the ease with which Royal personages, from long practice, -manage to address appropriate and varied remarks to perhaps forty -people of different nationalities, whilst "making the circle." - - - - -{48} - -CHAPTER II - -Easy-going Austria--Vienna--Charm of town--A little piece of -history---International families--Family -pride--"Schlüssel-Geld"--Excellence of Vienna restaurants--The origin -of "_Croissants_"--Good looks of Viennese women--Strauss's -operettas--A ball in an old Vienna house--Court entertainments--The -Empress Elisabeth--Delightful environs of Vienna--The Berlin Congress -of 1878--Lord Beaconsfield--M. de Blowitz--Treaty telegraphed to -London--Environs of Berlin--Potsdam and its lakes--The bow-oar of the -Embassy "four"--Narrow escape of ex-Kaiser--The Potsdam -palaces--Transfer to Petrograd--Glamour of Russia--An evening with -the Crown Prince at Potsdam. - - -Our Embassy at Vienna was greatly overworked at this time, owing to -the illness of two of the staff, and some fresh developments of the -perennial "Eastern Question." I was accordingly "lent" to the Vienna -Embassy for as long as was necessary, and left at once for the -Austrian capital. - -At the frontier station of Tetschen the transition from cast-iron, -dictatorial, overbearing Prussian efficiency to the good-natured, -easy-going, slipshod methods of the "ramshackle Empire" was -immediately apparent. - -The change from Berlin to Vienna was refreshing. The straight, -monotonous, well-kept streets of the Northern capital lacked life and -animation. It was a very fine frame enclosing no picture. The -Vienna {49} streets were as gay as those of Paris, and one was -conscious of being in a city with centuries of traditions. The Inner -Town of Vienna with its narrow winding streets is extraordinarily -picturesque. The demolisher has not been given the free hand he has -been allowed in Paris, and the fine _baroque_ houses still remaining -give an air of great distinction to this part of the town, with its -many highly-decorative, if somewhat florid, fountains and columns. -One was no longer in the "pushful" atmosphere of Prussia. These -cheery, easy-going Viennese loved music and dancing, eating and -drinking, laughter and fun. They were quite content to drift lazily -down the stream of life, with as much enjoyment and as little trouble -as possible. They might be a decadent race, but they were -essentially _gemüthliche Leute_. The untranslatable epithet -_gemüthlich_ implies something at once "comfortable," "sociable," -"cosy," and "pleasant." - -The Austrian aristocracy were most charming people. They had all -intermarried for centuries, and if they did not trouble their -intellect much, there may have been physical difficulties connected -with the process for which they were not responsible. The degree of -warmth of their reception of foreigners was largely dependent upon -whether he, or she, could show the indispensable _sechzehn Ahnen_ -(the "sixteen quarterings"). Once satisfied (or the reverse) as to -this point, to which they attach immense importance, the situation -became easier. As the whole of these people were interrelated, they -{50} were all on Christian names terms, and the various "Mitzis," -"Kitzis," "Fritzis," and other characteristically Austrian -abbreviations were a little difficult to place at times. - -It was impossible not to realise that the whole nation was living on -the traditions of their splendid past. It must be remembered that in -the sixteenth century the Hapsburgs ruled the whole of Europe with -the exception of France, England, Russia, and the Scandinavian -countries. For centuries after Charlemagne assumed the Imperial -Crown there had been only one Emperor in Europe, the "Holy Roman -Emperor," the "Heiliger Römischer Kaiser," the fiction being, of -course, that he was the descendant of the Cæsars. The word "Kaiser" -is only the German variant of Cæsar. France and England had always -consistently refused to acknowledge the overlordship of the Emperor, -but the prestige of the title in German-speaking lands was immense, -though the Holy Roman Empire itself was a mere simulacrum of power. -In theory the Emperor was elected; in practice the title came to be a -hereditary appanage of the proud Hapsburgs. It was, I think, -Talleyrand who said "L'Autrice a la Fächeuse habitude d'être toujours -battue," and this was absolutely true. Austria was defeated with -unfailing regularity in almost every campaign, and the Hapsburgs saw -their immense dominions gradually slipping from their grasp. It was -on May 14, 1804, that Napoleon was crowned Emperor of the French in -Paris, and Francis II, the last of {51} the Holy Roman Emperors, was -fully aware that Napoleon's next move would be to supplant him and -get himself elected as "Roman Emperor." This Napoleon would have -been able to achieve, as he had bribed the Electors of Bavaria, -Württemberg, and Saxony by creating them kings. For once a Hapsburg -acted with promptitude. On August 11, 1804, Francis proclaimed -himself hereditary Emperor of Austria, and two years later he -abolished the title of Holy Roman Emperor. The Empire, after a -thousand years of existence, flickered out ingloriously in 1806. The -pride of the Hapsburgs had received a hundred years previously a rude -shock. Peter the Great, after consolidating Russia, abolished the -title of Tsar of Muscovy, and proclaimed himself Emperor of All the -Russias; purposely using the same term "Imperator" as that employed -by the Roman Emperor, and thus putting himself on an equality with -him. - -I know by experience that it is impossible to din into the heads of -those unfamiliar with Russia that since Peter the Great's time there -has never been a Tsar. The words "Tsar," "Tsarina," "Cesarevitch," -beloved of journalists, exist only in their imagination; they are -never heard in Russia. The Russians termed their Emperor "Gosudar -Imperator," using either or both of the words. Empress is -"Imperatritza"; Heir Apparent "Nadslyédnik." If you mentioned the -words "Tsar" or "Tsarina" to any ordinary Russian peasant, I doubt if -he would understand you, but I am well {52} aware that it is no use -repeating this, the other idea is too firmly ingrained. The -Hapsburgs had yet another bitter pill to swallow. Down to the middle -of the nineteenth century the ancient prestige of the title Kaiser -and the glamour attached to it were maintained throughout the -Germanic Confederation, but in 1871 a second brand-new Kaiser arose -on the banks of the Spree, and the Hapsburgs were shorn of their long -monopoly. - -Franz Josef of Austria must have rued the day when Sigismund sold the -sandy Mark of Brandenburg to Frederick Count of Hohenzollern in 1415, -and regretted the acquiescence in 1701 of his direct ancestor, the -Emperor Leopold I, in the Elector of Brandenburg's request that he -might assume the title of King of Prussia. The Hohenzollerns were -ever a grasping race. I think that it was Louis XIV of France who, -whilst officially recognising the new King of Prussia, refused to -speak of him as such, and always alluded to him as "Monsieur le -Marquis de Brandenbourg." - -No wonder that the feeling of bitterness against Prussia amongst the -upper classes of Austria was very acute in the "'seventies." The -events of 1866 were still too recent to have been forgotten. In my -time the great Austrian ladies affected the broadest Vienna popular -dialect, probably to emphasise the fact that they were not Prussians. -Thus the sentence "ein Glas Wasser, bitte," became, written in -phonetic English, "a' Glawss Vawsser beet." I myself was much -rallied on my pedantic {53} North-German pronunciation, and had in -self-defence to adopt unfamiliar Austrian equivalents for many words. - -The curious international families which seemed to abound in Vienna -always puzzled me. Thus the princes d'Aremberg are Belgians, but -there was one Prince d'Aremberg in the Austrian service, whilst his -brother was in the Prussian Diplomatic Service, the remainder of the -family being Belgians. There were, in the same way, many -German-speaking Pourtales in Berlin in the German service, and more -French-speaking ones in Paris in the French service. The Duc de Croy -was both a Belgian and an Austrian subject. The Croys are one of the -oldest families in Europe, and are _ebenbürtig_ ("born on an -equality") with all the German Royalties. They therefore show no -signs of respect to Archdukes and Archduchesses when they meet them. -Although I cannot vouch personally for them, never having myself seen -them, I am told that there are two pictures in the Croy Palace at -Brussels which reach the apogee of family pride. The first depicts -Noah embarking on his ark. Although presumably anxious about the -comfort of the extensive live-stock he has on board, Noah finds time -to give a few parting instructions to his sons. On what is -technically called a "bladder" issuing from his mouth are the words, -"And whatever you do, don't forget to bring with you the family -papers of the Croys." ("Et surtout ayez soin de ne pas oublier les -papiers de la Maison de Croy!") The {54} other picture represents -the Madonna and Child, with the then Duke of Croy kneeling in -adoration before them. Out of the Virgin Mary's mouth comes a -"bladder" with the words "But please put on your hat, dear cousin." -("Mais couvrez vous donc, cher cousin.") - -The whole of Viennese life is regulated by one exceedingly tiresome -custom. After 10 or 10.15 p.m. the hall porter (known in Vienna as -the "House-master") of every house in the city has the right of -levying a small toll of threepence on each person entering or leaving -the house. The whole life of the Vienna bourgeois is spent in trying -to escape this tax, known as "Schlüssel-Geld." The theatres commence -accordingly at 6 p.m. or 6.30, which entails dining about 5 p.m. A -typical Viennese middle-class family will hurry out in the middle of -the last act and scurry home breathlessly, as the fatal hour -approaches. Arrived safely in their flat, in the last stages of -exhaustion, they say triumphantly to each other. "We have missed the -end of the play, and we are rather out of breath, but never mind, we -have escaped the 'Schlüssel-Geld,' and as we are four, that makes a -whole shilling saved!" - -An equally irritating custom is the one that ordains that in -restaurants three waiters must be tipped in certain fixed -proportions. The "Piccolo," who brings the wine and bread, receives -one quarter of the tip; the "Speisetrager," who brings the actual -food, gets one half; the "Zahlkellner," {55} who brings the bill, -gets one quarter. All these must be given separately, so not only -does it entail a hideous amount of mental arithmetic, but it also -necessitates the perpetual carrying about of pocketfuls of small -change. - -The Vienna restaurants were quite excellent, with a local cuisine of -extraordinary succulence, and more extraordinary names. A universal -Austrian custom, not only in restaurants but in private houses as -well, is to serve a glass of the delicious light Vienna beer with the -soup. Even at State dinners at the Hof-Burg, a glass of beer was -always offered with the soup. The red wine, Voslauer, grown in the -immediate vicinity of the city, is so good, and has such a -distinctive flavour, that I wonder it has never been exported. The -restaurants naturally suggest the matchless Viennese orchestras. -They were a source of never-ending delight to me. The distinction -they manage to give to quite commonplace little airs is -extraordinary. The popular songs, "Wiener-Couplets," melodious, airy -nothings, little light soap-bubbles of tunes, are one of the -distinctive features of Vienna. Played by an Austrian band as only -an Austrian band can play them, with astonishing vim and fire, and -supremely dainty execution, these little fragile melodies are quite -charming and irresistibly attractive. We live in a progressive age. -In the place of these Austrian bands with their finished execution -and consummately musicianly feeling, the twentieth century {56} has -invented the Jazz band with its ear-splitting, chaotic din. - -There is a place in Vienna known as the Heiden-Schuss, or "Shooting -of the heathens." The origin of this is quite interesting. - -In 1683 the Turks invaded Hungary, and, completely overrunning the -country, reached Vienna, to which they laid siege, for the second -time in its history. Incidentally, they nearly succeeded in -capturing it. During the siege bakers' apprentices were at work one -night in underground bakehouses, preparing the bread for next day's -consumption. The lads heard a rhythmic "thump, thump, thump," and -were much puzzled by it. Two of the apprentices, more intelligent -than the rest, guessed that the Turks were driving a mine, and ran -off to the Commandant of Vienna with their news. They saw the -principal engineer officer and told him of their discovery. He -accompanied them back to the underground bakehouse, and at once -determined that the boys were right. Having got the direction from -the sound, the Austrians drove a second tunnel, and exploded a -powerful counter-mine. Great numbers of Turks were killed, and the -siege was temporarily raised. On September 12 of the same year -(1683) John Sobieski, King of Poland, utterly routed the Turks, drove -them back into their own country, and Vienna was saved. As a reward -for the intelligence shown by the baker-boys, they were granted the -privilege of making and selling a rich kind of roll (into the {57} -composition of which butter entered largely) in the shape of the -Turkish emblem, the crescent. These rolls became enormously popular -amongst the Viennese, who called them _Kipfeln_. When Marie -Antoinette married Louis XVI of France, she missed her Kipfel, and -sent to Vienna for an Austrian baker to teach his Paris _confrères_ -the art of making them. These rolls, which retained their original -shape, became as popular in Paris as they had been in Vienna, and -were known as _Croissants_, and that is the reason why one of the -rolls which are brought you with your morning coffee in Paris will be -baked in the form of a crescent. - -The extraordinary number of good-looking women, of all classes to be -seen in the streets of Vienna was most striking, especially after -Berlin, where a lower standard of feminine beauty prevailed. -Particularly noticeable were the admirable figures with which most -Austrian women are endowed. In the far-off "'seventies" ladies did -not huddle themselves into a shapeless mass of abbreviated oddments -of material--they dressed, and their clothes fitted them; and a woman -on whom Nature (or Art) had bestowed a good figure was able to -display her gifts to the world. In the same way, Fashion did not -compel a pretty girl to smother up her features in unbecoming tangles -of tortured hair. The usual fault of Austrian faces is their breadth -across the cheek-bones; the Viennese too have a decided tendency {58} -to _embonpoint_, but in youth these defects are not accentuated. -Amongst the Austrian aristocracy the great beauty of the girls was -very noticeable, as was their height, in marked contrast to the short -stature of most of the men. I have always heard that one of the -first outward signs of the decadence of a race is that the girls grow -taller, whilst the men get shorter. - -The Vienna theatres are justly celebrated. At the Hof-Burg Theatre -may be seen the most finished acting on the German stage. The Burg -varied its programme almost nightly, and it was an amusing sight to -see the troops of liveried footmen inquiring at the box-office, on -behalf of their mistresses, whether the play to be given that night -was or was not a _Comtessen-Stück_, _i.e._, a play fit for young -girls to see. The box-keeper always gave a plain "Yes" or "No" in -reply. After Charles Garnier's super-ornate pile in Paris, the -Vienna Opera-house is the finest in Europe, and the musical standard -reaches the highest possible level, completely eclipsing Paris in -that respect. In the "'seventies" Johann Strauss's delightful comic -operas still retained their vogue. Bubbling over with merriment, -full of delicious ear-tickling melodies, and with a "go" and an -irresistible intoxication about them that no French composer has ever -succeeded in emulating, these operettas, "Die Fledermaus," "Prinz -Methusalem," and "La Reine Indigo," would well stand revival. When -the "Fledermaus" {59} was revived in London some ten years ago it -ran, if my memory serves me right, for nearly a year. Occasionally -Strauss himself conducted one of his own operettas; then the -orchestra, responding to his magical baton, played like very demons. -Strauss had one peculiarity. Should he be dissatisfied with the vim -the orchestra put into one of his favourite numbers, he would snatch -the instrument from the first violin and play it himself. Then the -orchestra answered like one man, and one left the theatre with the -entrancing strains still tingling in one's ears. - -The family houses of most of the Austrian nobility were in the Inner -Town, the old walled city, where space was very limited. These fine -old houses, built for the greater part in the Italian baroque style, -though splendid for entertaining, were almost pitch dark and very -airless in the daytime. Judging, too, from the awful smells in them, -they must have been singularly insanitary dwellings. The Lobkowitz -Palace, afterwards the French Embassy, was so dark by day that -artificial light had always to be used. In the great seventeenth -century ball-room of the Lobkowitz Palace there was a railed off -oak-panelled alcove containing a bust of Beethoven, an oak table, and -three chairs. It was in that alcove, and at that table, that -Beethoven, when librarian to Prince Lobkowitz, composed some of his -greatest works. - -Our own Embassy in the Metternichgasse, built {60} by the British -Government, was rather cramped and could in no way compare with the -Berlin house. - -I remember well a ball given by Prince S----, head of one of the -greatest Austrian families, in his fine but extremely dark house in -the Inner Town. It was Prince S----'s custom on these occasions to -have three hundred young peasants sent up from his country estates, -and to have them all thrust into the family livery. These bucolic -youths, looking very sheepish in their unfamiliar plush breeches and -stockings, with their unkempt heads powdered, and with swords at -their sides, stood motionless on every step of the staircase. I -counted one hundred of these rustic retainers on the staircase alone. -They would have looked better had their liveries occasionally fitted -them. The ball-room at Prince S----'s was hung with splendid -Brussels seventeenth century tapestry framed in mahogany panels, -heavily carved and gilt. I have never seen this combination of -mahogany, gilding, and tapestry anywhere else. It was wonderfully -decorative, and with the elaborate painted ceiling made a fine -setting for an entertainment. It was a real pleasure to see how -whole-heartedly the Austrians threw themselves into the dancing. I -think they all managed to retain a child's power of enjoyment, and -they never detracted from this by any unnecessary brainwork. Still -they were delightfully friendly, easy-going people. A distinctive -feature of every Vienna ball {61} was the "Comtessen-Zimmer," or room -reserved for girls. At the end of every dance they all trooped in -there, giggling and gossiping, and remained there till the music for -the next dance struck up. No married woman dared intrude into the -"Comtessen-Zimmer," and I shudder to think of what would have -befallen the rash male who ventured to cross that jealously-guarded -threshold. I imagine that the charming and beautifully-dressed -Austrian married women welcomed this custom, for between the dances -at all events they could still hold the field, free from the -competition of a younger and fresher generation. - -At Prince S----'s, at midnight, armies of rustic retainers, in their -temporary disguise, brought battalions of supper tables into the -ball-room, and all the guests sat down to a hot supper at the same -time. As an instance of how Austrians blended simplicity with a -great love of externals, I see from my diary that the supper -consisted of bouillon, of plain-boiled carp with horse-radish, of -thick slices of hot roast beef, and a lemon ice--and nothing else -whatever. A sufficiently substantial repast, but hardly in -accordance with modern ideas as to what a ball-supper should consist -of. The young peasants, considering that it was their first attempt -at waiting, did not break an undue number of plates; they tripped at -times, though, over their unaccustomed swords, and gaped vacantly, or -would get hitched up with each other, when more dishes crashed to -their doom. - -{62} - -In Vienna there was a great distinction drawn between a "Court Ball" -(Hof-Ball) and a "Ball at the Court" (Ball bei Hof). To the former -everyone on the Palace list was invited, to the latter only a few -people; and the one was just as crowded and disagreeable as the other -was the reverse. The great rambling pile of the Hof-Burg contains -some very fine rooms and a marvellous collection of works of art, and -the so-called "Ceremonial Apartments" are of quite Imperial -magnificence, but the general effect was far less striking than in -Berlin. - -In spite of the beauty of the women, the _coup d'oeil_ was spoilt by -the ugly Austrian uniforms. After the disastrous campaign of 1866, -the traditional white of the Austrian Army was abolished, and the -uniforms were shorn of all unnecessary trappings. The military -tailors had evolved hideous garments, ugly in colour, unbecoming in -cut. One can only trust that they proved very economical, but the -contrast with the splendid and admirably made uniforms of the -Prussian Army was very marked. The Hungarian magnates in their -traditional family costumes (from which all Hussar uniforms are -derived) added a note of gorgeous colour, with their gold-laced -tunics and their many-hued velvet slung-jackets. I remember, on the -occasion of Queen Victoria's Jubilee in 1887, the astonishment caused -by a youthful and exceedingly good-looking Hungarian who appeared at -Buckingham Palace in skin-tight blue breeches {63} lavishly -embroidered with gold over the thighs, entirely gilt Hessian boots to -the knee, and a tight-fitting tunic cut out of a real tiger-skin, -fastened with some two dozen turquoise buttons the size of -five-shilling pieces. When this resplendent youth reappeared in -London ten years later at the Diamond Jubilee, it was with a tonsured -head, and he was wearing the violet robes of a prelate of the Roman -Church. - -As an instance of the inflexibility of the cast-iron rules of the -Hapsburg Court: I may mention that the beautiful Countess Karolyi, -Austrian Ambassadress in Berlin, was never asked to Court in Vienna, -as she lacked the necessary "sixteen quarterings." To a non-Austrian -mind it seems illogical that the lovely lady representing Austria in -Berlin should have been thought unfitted for an invitation from her -own Sovereign. - -The immense deference paid to the Austrian Archdukes and -Archduchesses was very striking after the comparatively unceremonious -fashion in which minor German royalties (always excepting the Emperor -and the Crown Prince) were treated in Berlin. The Archduchesses -especially were very tenacious of their privileges. They never could -forget that they were Hapsburgs, and exacted all the traditional -signs of respect. - -The unfortunate Empress Elisabeth, destined years after to fall under -the dagger of an assassin at Geneva, made but seldom a public -appearance in her husband's dominions. She had an almost {64} morbid -horror of fulfilling any of the duties of her position. During my -stay in the Austrian capital I only caught one glimpse of her, -driving through the streets. She was astonishingly handsome, with -coiled masses of dark hair, and a very youthful and graceful figure, -but the face was so impassive that it produced the effect of a -beautiful, listless mask. The Empress was a superb horse-woman, and -every single time she rode she was literally sewn into her habit by a -tailor, in order to ensure a perfect fit. - -The innumerable cafés of Vienna were crowded from morning to night. -Seeing them crammed with men in the forenoon, one naturally wondered -how the business of the city was transacted. Probably, in typical -Austrian fashion, these worthy Viennese left their businesses to take -care of themselves whilst they enjoyed themselves in the cafés. The -super-excellence of the Vienna coffee would afford a more or less -legitimate excuse for this. Nowhere in the world is such coffee -made, and a "Capuziner," or a "Melange," the latter with thick -whipped cream on the top of it, were indeed things of joy. - -Few capitals are more fortunate in their environs than Vienna. The -beautiful gardens and park of Schönbrunn Palace have a sort of -intimate charm which is wholly lacking at Versailles. They are -stately, yet do not overwhelm you with a sense of vast spaces. They -are crowned by a sort of temple, known as the Gloriette, {65} from -which a splendid view is obtained. - -In less than three hours from the capital, the railway climbs 3,000 -feet to the Semmering, where the mountain scenery is really grand. -During the summer months the whole of Vienna empties itself on to the -Semmering and the innumerable other hill-resorts within easy distance -from the city. - -When the time came for my departure, I felt genuinely sorry at -leaving this merry, careless, music and laughter-loving town, and -these genial, friendly, hospitable incompetents. I feel some -compunction in using this word, as people had been very good to me. -I cannot help feeling, though, that it is amply warranted. A bracing -climate is doubtless wholesome; but a relaxing one can be very -pleasant for a time. I went back to Berlin feeling like a boy -returning to school after his holidays. - -The Viennese had but little love for their upstart rival on the -Spree. They had invented the name "Parvenupopolis" for Berlin, and a -little popular song, which I may be forgiven for quoting in the -original German, expressed their sentiments fairly accurately: - - Es gibt nur eine Kaiserstadt, - Es gibt nur ein Wien; - Es gibt nur ein Raubernest, - Und das heisst Berlin. - - -I had a Bavarian friend in Berlin. We talked over the amazing -difference in temperament there {66} was between the Austrians and -the Prussians, and the curious charm there was about the former, -lacking in intellect though they might be, a charm wholly lacking in -the pushful, practical Prussians. My friend agreed, but claimed the -same attractive qualities for his own beloved Bavarians; "but," he -added impressively, "mark my words, in twenty years from now the -whole of Germany will be Prussianised!" ("_Ganz Deutschland wird -verpreussert werden_") Events have shown how absolutely correct my -Bavarian friend was in his forecast. - -In June, 1878, the great Congress for the settlement of the terms of -peace between Russia and Turkey assembled in Berlin. It was an -extraordinarily interesting occasion, for almost every single -European notability was to be seen in the German capital. The -Russian plenipotentiaries were the veteran Prince Gortchakoff and -Count Peter Schouvaloff, that most genial _faux-bonhomme_; the Turks -were championed by Ali Pasha and by Katheodory Pasha. Great Britain -was represented by Lords Beaconsfield and Salisbury; Austria by Count -Andrassy, the Prime Minister; France by M. Waddington. In spite of -the very large staff brought out from London by the British -plenipotentiaries, an enormous amount of work fell upon us at the -Embassy. - -To a youngster there is something very fascinating in being regarded -as so worthy of confidence that the most secret details of the great -game of diplomacy were all known to him from {67} day to day. A boy -of twenty-one feels very proud of the trust reposed in him, and at -being the repository of such weighty and important secrets. That is -the traditional method of the British Diplomatic Service. - -As all the Embassies gave receptions in honour of their own -plenipotentiaries, we met almost nightly all the great men of Europe, -and had occasional opportunities for a few words with them. Prince -Gortchakoff, who fancied himself Bismarck's only rival, was a little, -short, tubby man in spectacles; wholly undistinguished in appearance, -and looking for all the world like an average French provincial -notaire. Count Andrassy, the Hungarian, was a tall, strikingly -handsome man, with an immense head of hair. To me, he always -recalled the leader of a "Tzigane" orchestra. M. Waddington talked -English like an Englishman, and was so typically British in -appearance that it was almost impossible to realise that he was a -Frenchman. Our admiration for him was increased when we learnt that -he had rowed in the Cambridge Eight. But without any question -whatever, the personality which excited the greatest interest at the -Berlin Congress was that of Lord Beaconsfield, the Jew who by sheer -force of intellect had raised himself from nothing into his present -commanding position. His peculiar, colourless, inscrutable face, -with its sphinx-like impassiveness; the air of mystery which somehow -clung about him; the romantic story of his career; even the remnants -of {68} dandyism which he still retained in his old age--all these -seemed to whet the insatiable public curiosity about him. Some -enterprising Berlin tradesmen had brought out fans, with leaves -composed of plain white vellum, designed expressly for the Congress. -Armed with one of these fans, and with pen and ink, indefatigable -feminine autograph-hunters moved about at these evening receptions, -securing the signatures of the plenipotentiaries on the white vellum -leaves. Many of those fans must still be in existence, and should -prove very interesting to-day. Bismarck alone invariably refused his -autograph. - -At all these gatherings, M. de Blowitz, the then Paris correspondent -of the _Times_, was much to the fore. In the "'seventies" the -prestige of the _Times_ on the Continent of Europe was enormous. In -reality the influence of the _Times_ was very much overrated, since -all Continentals persisted in regarding it as the inspired mouthpiece -of the British Government. Great was the _Times_, but greater still -was de Blowitz, its prophet. This most remarkable man was a -veritable prince of newspaper correspondents. There was no move on -the European chess-board of which he was not cognisant, and as to -which he did not keep his paper well informed, and his information -was always accurate. De Blowitz knew no English, and his lengthy -daily telegrams to the _Times_ were always written in French and were -translated in London. He was really a Bohemian Jew of the name of -{69} Oppen, and he had bestowed the higher-sounding name of de -Blowitz on himself. He was a very short, fat little man, with -immensely long grey side-whiskers, and a most consequential manner. -He was a very great personage indeed in official circles. De Blowitz -has in his Memoirs given a full account of the trick by which he -learnt of the daily proceedings of the Congress and so transmitted -them to his paper. I need not, therefore, go into details about -this; it is enough to say that a daily exchange of hats, in the -lining of the second of which a summary of the day's deliberations -was concealed, played a great part in it. - -When the Treaty had been drawn up in French, Lord Salisbury rather -startled us by saying that he wished it translated into English and -cyphered to London that very evening _in extenso_. This was done to -obviate the possibility of the news-paper correspondents getting a -version of the Treaty through to London before the British Government -had received the actual text. As the Treaty was what I, in the light -of later experiences, would now describe as of fifteen thousand words -length, this was a sufficiently formidable undertaking. Fifteen of -us sat down to the task about 6 p.m., and by working at high pressure -we got the translation finished and the last cyphered sheet sent off -to the telegraph office by 5 a.m. The translation done at such -breakneck speed was possibly a little crude in places. One clause in -the Treaty provided that ships in ballast were to have {70} free -passage through the Dardanelles. Now the French for "ships in -ballast," is "_navires en lest_." The person translating this (who -was not a member of the British Diplomatic Service) rendered -"_navires en lest_" as "ships in the East," and in this form it was -cyphered to London. As, owing to the geographical position of the -Dardanelles, any ship approaching them would be, in one sense of the -term, a "ship in the East," there was considerable perturbation in -Downing Street over this clause, until the mistake was discovered. - -Berlin has wonderful natural advantages, considering that it is -situated in a featureless, sandy plain. In my day it was quite -possible to walk from the Embassy into a real, wild pine-forest, the -Grünewald. The Grünewald, being a Royal forest, was unbuilt on, and -quite unspoilt. It extended for miles, enclosing many pretty little -lakelets. Now I understand that it has been invaded by "villa -colonies," so its old charm of wildness must have vanished. The -Tiergarten, too, the park of Berlin, retains in places the look of a -real country wood. It is inadvisable to venture into the Tiergarten -after nightfall, should you wish to retain possession of your watch, -purse, and other portable property. The sandy nature of the soil -makes it excellent for riding. Within quite a short distance of the -city you can find tracts of heathery moor, and can get a good gallop -almost anywhere. - -There is quite fair partridge-shooting, too, within {71} a few miles -of Berlin, in the immense potato fields, though the entire absence of -cover in this hedgeless land makes it very difficult at times to -approach the birds. It is pre-eminently a country for "driving" -partridges, though most Germans prefer the comparatively easy shots -afforded by "walking the birds up." - -Potsdam has had but scant justice done it by foreigners. The town is -almost surrounded by the river Havel, which here broadens out into a -series of winding, wooded lakes, surrounded by tree-clad hills. The -Potsdam lakes are really charmingly pretty, and afford an admirable -place for rowing or sailing. Neither of these pursuits seems to make -the least appeal to Germans. The Embassy kept a small yacht at -Potsdam, but she was practically the only craft then on the lakes. -As on all narrow waters enclosed by wooded hills, the sailing was -very tricky, owing to the constant shifting of the wind. Should it -be blowing fresh, it was advisable to sail under very light canvas; -and it was always dangerous to haul up the centre-board, even when -"running," as on rounding some wooded point you would get "taken -aback" to a certainty. Once in the fine open stretch of water -between Wansee and Spandau, you could hoist every stitch of canvas -available, and indulge with impunity in the most complicated nautical -manoeuvres. Possibly my extreme fondness for the Potsdam lakes may -be due to their extraordinary resemblance to the lakes at my own -Northern country home. - -{72} - -The Embassy also owned a light Thames-built four-oar. At times a -short, thick-set young man of nineteen pulled bow in our four. The -short young man had a withered arm, and the doctors hoped that the -exercise of rowing might put some strength into it. He seemed quite -a commonplace young man, yet this short, thick-set youth was destined -less than forty years after to plunge the world into the greatest -calamity it has ever known; to sacrifice millions and millions of -human lives to his own inordinate ambition; and to descend to -posterity as one of the most sinister characters in the pages of -history. - -Moored in the "Jungfernsee," one of the Potsdam lakes, lay a -miniature sailing frigate, a complete model of a larger craft down to -the smallest details. This toy frigate had been a present from King -William IV of England to the then King of Prussia. The little -frigate had been built in London, and though of only 30-tons burden, -had been sailed down the Thames, across the North Sea, and up the -Elbe and Havel to Potsdam, by a British naval officer. A pretty bit -of seamanship! I have always heard that it was the sight of this toy -frigate, lying on the placid lake at Potsdam, that first inspired -William of Hohenzollern with the idea of building a gigantic navy. - -The whole history of the world might have been changed by an incident -which occurred on these same Potsdam lakes in 1880. I have already -said that William of Hohenzollern, then only Prince {73} William, -pulled at times in our Embassy four, in the hope that it might -strengthen his withered arm. He was very anxious to see if he could -learn to scull, in spite of his physical defect, and asked the -Ambassadress, Lady Ampthill, whether she would herself undertake to -coach him. Lady Ampthill consented, and met Prince William next day -at the landing-stage with a light Thames-built skiff, belonging to -the Embassy. Lady Ampthill, with the caution of one used to light -boats, got in carefully, made her way aft, and grasped the -yoke-lines. She then explained to Prince William that this was not a -heavy boat such as he had been accustomed to, that he must exercise -extreme care, and in getting in must tread exactly in the centre of -the boat. William of Hohenzollern, who had never taken advice from -anyone in his life, and was always convinced that he himself knew -best, responded by jumping into the boat from the landing-stage, -capsizing it immediately, and throwing himself and Lady Ampthill into -the water. Prince William, owing to his malformation, was unable to -swim one stroke, but help was at hand. Two of the Secretaries of the -British Embassy had witnessed the accident, and rushed up to aid. -The so-called "Naval Station" was close by, where the Emperor's -Potsdam yacht lay, a most singularly shabby old paddle-boat. Some -German sailors from the "Naval Post" heard the shouting and ran up, -and a moist, and we will trust a chastened William and a dripping -Ambassadress were {74} eventually rescued from the lake. Otherwise -William of Hohenzollern might have ended his life in the -"Jungfernsee" at Potsdam that day, and millions of other men would -have been permitted to live out their allotted span of existence. - -Potsdam itself is quite a pleasing town, with a half-Dutch, -half-Italian physiognomy. Both were deliberately borrowed; the first -by Frederick William I, who constructed the tree-lined canals which -give Potsdam its half-Batavian aspect; the second by Frederick the -Great, who fronted Teutonic dwellings with façades copied from Italy -to add dignity to the town. It must in justice be added that both -are quite successful, though Potsdam, like most other things -connected with the Hohenzollerns, has only a couple of hundred years' -tradition behind it. The square opposite the railway really does -recall Italy. The collection of palaces at Potsdam is bewildering. -Of these, three are of the first rank: the Town Palace, Sans-souci, -and the great pile of the "New Palace." Either Frederick the Great -was very fortunate in his architects, or else he chose them with -great discrimination. The Town Palace, even in my time but seldom -inhabited, is very fine in the finished details of its decoration. -Sans-souci is an absolute gem; its rococo style may be a little -over-elaborate, but it produces the effect of a finished, complete -whole, in the most admirable taste; even though the exuberant -imagination of the eighteenth century has been allowed to run riot in -it. The gardens of Sans-souci, too, {75} are most attractive. The -immense red-brick building of the New Palace was erected by Frederick -the Great during the Seven Years' War, out of sheer bravado. He was -anxious to impress on his enemies the fact that his financial -resources were not yet exhausted. Considering that he already -possessed two stately palaces within a mile of it, the New Palace may -be looked upon as distinctly a work of supererogation, also as an -appalling waste of money. As a piece of architecture, it is -distinctly a success. This list does not, however, nearly exhaust -the palatial resources of Potsdam. The eighteenth century had -contributed its successes; it remained for the nineteenth to add its -failures. Babelsberg, the old Emperor William's favourite residence, -was an awful example of a ginger-bread pseudo-Gothic castle. The -Marble Palace on the so-called "Holy Lake" was a dull, unimaginative -building; and the "Red Prince's" house at Glienicke was frankly -terrible. The main features of this place was an avenue of huge -cast-iron gilded lions. These golden lions were such a blot on an -otherwise charming landscape that one felt relieved by recalling that -the apparently ineradicable tendency of the children of Israel to -erect Golden Calves at various places in olden days had always been -severely discountenanced. - -In spite of the carpenter-Gothic of Babelsberg, and of the pinchbeck -golden lions of Glienicke, Potsdam will remain in my mind, to the end -of my life, associated with memories of fresh breezes {76} and -bellying sails; of placid lakes and swift-gliding keels responding to -the straining muscles of back and legs; a place of verdant hills -dipping into clear waters; of limbs joyously cleaving those clear -waters with all the exultation of the swimmer; a place of rest and -peace, with every fibre in one's being rejoicing in being away, for -the time being, from crowded cities and stifling streets, in the free -air amidst woods, waters, and gently-swelling, tree-clad heights. - -A year later, I was notified that I was transferred to Petrograd, -then of course still known as St. Petersburg. This was in accordance -with the dearest wish of my heart. Ever since my childhood's days I -had been filled with an intense desire to go to Russia. Like most -people unacquainted with the country, I had formed the most -grotesquely incorrect mental pictures of Russia. I imagined it a -vast Empire of undreamed of magnificence, pleasantly tempered with -relics of barbarism; and all these glittering splendours were -enveloped in the snow and ice of a semi-Arctic climate, which gave -additional piquancy to their glories. I pictured huge tractless -forests, their dark expanse only broken by the shimmering golden -domes of the Russian churches. I fancied this glamour-land peopled -by a species of transported French, full of culture, and all of them -polyglot, more brilliant and infinitely more intellectual than their -West European prototypes. I imagined this hyperborean paradise -served by a race of super-astute {77} diplomatists and officials, -with whom we poor Westerners could not hope to contend, and by -Generals whom no one could withstand. The evident awe with which -Germans envisaged their Eastern neighbours strengthened this idea, -and both in England and in France I had heard quite responsible -persons gloomily predict, after contemplating the map, that the -Northern Colossus was fatally destined at some time to absorb the -whole of the rest of Europe. - -Apart then from its own intrinsic attraction, I used to gaze at the -map of Russia with some such feelings as, I imagine, the early -Christians experienced when, on their Sunday walks in Rome, they went -to look at the lions in their dens in the circus, and speculated as -to their own sensations when, as seemed but too probable, they might -have to meet these interesting quadrupeds on the floor of the arena, -in a brief, exciting, but definitely final encounter. - -Everything I had seen or heard about this mysterious land had -enhanced its glamour. The hair-raising rumours which reached Berlin -as to revolutionary plots and counter-plots; the appalling stories -one heard about the terrible secret police; the atmosphere of -intrigue which seemed indigenous to the place--all added to its -fascinations. Even the externals were attractive. I had attended -weddings and funeral services at the chapel of the Russian Embassy. -Here every detail was exotic, and utterly dissimilar to anything in -one's previous {78} experience. The absence of seats, organ, or -pulpit in the chapel itself; the elaborate Byzantine decorations of -the building; the exquisitely beautiful but quite unfamiliar singing; -the long-bearded priests in their archaic vestments of unaccustomed -golden brocades--everything struck a novel note. It all came from a -world apart, centuries removed from the prosaic routine of Western -Europe. - -Even quite minor details, such as the curiously sumptuous Russian -national dresses of the ladies of the Embassy at Court functions, the -visits to Berlin of the Russian ballets and troupes of Russian -singing gipsies, had all the same stamp of strong racial -individuality, of something temperamentally different from all we had -been accustomed to. - -I was overjoyed at the prospect of seeing for myself at last this -land of mingled splendour and barbarism, this country which had -retained its traditional racial characteristics in spite of the -influences of nineteenth century drab uniformity of type. - -As the Petrograd Embassy was short-handed at the time, it was settled -that I should postpone my leave for some months and proceed to Russia -without delay. - -The Crown Prince and Crown Princess, who had been exceedingly kind to -me during my stay in Berlin, were good enough to ask me to the New -Palace at Potsdam for one night, to take leave of them. - -{79} - -I had never before had an opportunity of going all over the New -Palace. I thought it wonderfully fine, though quite French in -feeling. The rather faded appearance of some of the rooms increased -their look of dignity. It was not of yesterday. The great "Shell -Hall," or "Muschel-Saal," much admired of Prussians, is frankly -horrible; one of the unfortunate aberrations of eighteenth century -taste of which several examples occur in English country-houses of -the same date. - -My own bedroom was charming; of the purest Louis XV, with apple-green -polished panelling and heavily silvered mouldings and mirrors. - -Nothing could be more delightful than the Crown Prince's manner on -occasions such as this. The short-lived Emperor Frederick had the -knack of blending absolute simplicity with great dignity, as had the -Empress Frederick. For the curious in such matters, and as an -instance of the traditional frugality of the Prussian Court, I may -add that supper that evening, at which only the Crown Prince and -Princess, the equerry and lady-in-waiting, and myself were present, -consisted solely of curds and whey, veal cutlets, and a rice pudding. -Nothing else whatever. We sat afterwards in a very stately, lofty, -thoroughly French room. The Crown Prince, the equerry, and myself -drank beer, whilst the Prince smoked his long pipe. It seemed -incongruous to drink beer amid such absolutely French surroundings. -I noticed that the Crown Princess always laid down her needlework to -refill {80} her husband's pipe and to bring him a fresh tankard of -beer. The "Kronprinzliches Paar," as a German would have described -them, were both perfectly charming in their conversation with a dull, -uninteresting youth of twenty-one. They each had marvellous -memories, and recalled many trivial half-forgotten details about my -own family. That evening in the friendly atmosphere of the great, -dimly-lit room in the New Palace at Potsdam will always live in my -memory. - -Two days afterwards I drove through the trim, prosaic, well-ordered, -stuccoed streets of Berlin to the Eastern Station; for me, the -gateway to the land of my desires, vast, mysterious Russia. - - - - -{81} - -CHAPTER III - -The Russian frontier--Frontier police--Disappointment at aspect of -Petrograd--Lord and Lady Dufferin--The British Embassy--St. Isaac's -Cathedral--Beauty of Russian Church-music--The Russian language--The -delightful "Blue-stockings" of Petrograd--Princess Chateau--Pleasant -Russian Society--The Secret Police--The Countess's hurried -journey--The Yacht Club--Russians really Orientals--Their -limitations--The "Intelligenzia"--My Nihilist friends--Their lack of -constructive power--Easter Mass at St. Isaac's--Two comical -incidents--The Easter supper--The red-bearded young priest--An Empire -built on shifting sand. - - -Petrograd is 1,050 miles from Berlin, and forty years ago the fastest -trains took forty-five hours to cover the distance between the two -capitals. In later years the "Nord-Express" accomplishing the -journey in twenty-nine hours. - -Rolling through the flat fertile plains of East Prussia, with their -neat, prosperous villages and picturesque black-and-white farms, the -surroundings had such a commonplace air that it was difficult to -realise that one was approaching the very threshold of the great, -mysterious Northern Empire. - -Eydkuhnen, the last Prussian station, was as other Prussian stations, -built of trim red brick, neat, practical, and very ugly; with crowds -of red-faced, amply-paunched officials, buttoned into the tightest of -uniforms, perpetually saluting each other. - -{82} - -Wierjbolovo, or Wirballen Station as the Germans call it, a huge -white building, was plainly visible only a third of a mile away. At -Wirballen the German train would stop, for whereas the German -railways are built to the standard European gauge of 4 feet 8½ -inches, the Russian lines were laid to a gauge of 5 feet 1 inch. - -This gauge had been deliberately chosen to prevent the invasion of -Russia by her Western neighbour. This was to prove an absolutely -illusory safeguard, for, as events have shown, nothing is easier than -to _narrow_ a railway track. To broaden it is often quite -impossible. The cunning little Japs found this out during the -Russo-Japanese War. They narrowed the broad Russian lines to their -own gauge of 3 feet 6 inches, _and then sawed off the ends of the -sleepers_ with portable circular saws, thus making it impossible for -the Russians to relay the rails on the broad gauge. I believe that -the Germans adopted the same device more recently. - -I think at only one other spot in the world does a short quarter of a -mile result in such amazing differences in externals as does that -little piece of line between Eydkuhnen and Wirballen; and that is at -Linea, the first Spanish village out of Gibraltar. - -Leaving the prim and starched orderliness of Gibraltar, with its -thick coating of British veneer, its tidy streets and buildings -enlivened with the scarlet tunics of Mr. Thomas Atkins and his -brethren, {83} you traverse the "Neutral Ground" to an iron railing, -and literally pass into Spain through an iron gate. The contrast is -extraordinary. It would be unfair to select Linea as a typical -Spanish village; it is ugly, and lacks the picturesque features of -the ordinary Andalusian village; it is also unquestionably very -dirty, and very tumble-down. Between Eydkuhnen and Wirballen the -contrast is just as marked. As the German train stopped, hosts of -bearded, shaggy-headed individuals in high boots and long white -aprons (surely a curious article of equipment for a railway porter) -swooped down upon the hand-baggage; I handed my passport to a -gendarme (a term confined in Russia to frontier and railway police) -and passed through an iron gate into Russia. - -Russia in this case was represented by a gigantic whitewashed hall, -ambitious originally in design and decoration, but, like most things -in Russia, showing traces of neglect and lack of cleanliness. The -first exotic note was struck by a full-length, life-size ikon of the -Saviour, in a solid silver frame, at the end of the hall. All my -Russian fellow-travellers devoutly crossed themselves before this -ikon, purchased candles at an adjoining stall, and fixed them in the -silver holders before the ikon. - -Behind the line of tables serving for the Customs examinations was a -railed-off space, containing many desks under green-shaded lamps. -Here some fifteen green-coated men whispered mysteriously to each -other, referring continually to huge registers. {84} I felt a thrill -creep down my back; here I found myself at last face to face with the -omnipotent Russian police. The bespectacled green-coated men -scrutinised passports intently, conferred amongst themselves in -whispers under the green-shaded lamps, and hunted ominously through -the big registers. For the first time I became unpleasantly -conscious of the existence of such places as the Fortress of St. -Peter and St. Paul, and of a country called Siberia. I speculated as -to whether the drawbacks of the Siberian climate had not been -exaggerated, should one be compelled to make a possibly prolonged -sojourn in that genial land. Above all, I was immensely impressed -with the lynx-eyed vigilance and feverish activity of these -green-coated guardians of the Russian frontier. From my subsequent -knowledge of the ways of Russian officials, I should gather that all -this feverish activity began one minute after the whistle announced -the approach of the Berlin train, and ceased precisely one minute -after the Petrograd train had pulled out, and that never, by any -chance, did the frontier police succeed in stopping the entry of any -really dangerous conspirator. - -Diplomats with official passports are exempt from Customs -formalities, so I passed on to the platform, thick with pungent -wood-smoke, where the huge blue-painted Russian carriages smoked like -volcanoes from their heating apparatus, and the gigantic wood-burning -engine (built in Germany) vomited dense clouds from its funnel, -crowned with {85} a spark-arrester shaped like a mammoth tea urn, or -a giant's soup tureen. Everything in this country seemed on a large -scale. - -In the gaunt, bare, whitewashed restaurant (these three epithets are -applicable to almost every public room in Russia) with its great -porcelain stove, and red lamps burning before gilded ikons, I first -made the acquaintance of fresh caviar and raw herrings, of the -national cabbage soup, or "shtchee," of roast ryabehiks and salted -cucumbers, all destined to become very familiar. Railway restaurants -in Russia are almost invariably quite excellent. - -And so the train clanked out through the night, into the depths of -this mysterious glamour-land. - -The railway from the frontier to Petrograd runs for 550 miles through -an unbroken stretch of interminable dreary swamp and forest, such as -would in Canada be termed "muskag," with here and there a poor -attempt at cultivation in some clearing, set about with wretched -little wooden huts. After a twenty-four hours' run, without any -preliminary warning whatever in the shape of suburbs, the train -emerges from the forest into a huge city, with tramcars rolling in -all directions, and the great golden dome of St. Isaac's blazing like -a sun against the murky sky. - -I had pictured Petrograd to myself as a second Paris; a city -glittering with light and colour, but conceived on an infinitely more -grandiose scale than the French capital. - -We emerged from the station into an immensely {86} broad street -bordered by shabbily-pretentious buildings all showing signs of -neglect. The atrociously uneven pavements, the general untidiness, -the broad thoroughfare empty except for a lumbering cart or two, the -absence of foot-passengers, and the low cotton-wool sky, all gave an -effect of unutterable dreariness. And this was the golden city of my -dreams! this place of leprous-fronted houses, of vast open spaces -full of drifting snowflakes, and of an immense emptiness. I never -was so disappointed in my life. The gilt and coloured domes of the -Orthodox churches, the sheepskin-clad, red-shirted moujiks, the -occasional swift-trotting Russian carriages, with their bearded and -padded coachmen, were the only local touches that redeemed the -streets from the absolute commonplace. The Russian lettering over -the shops, which then conveyed nothing whatever to me, suggested that -the alphabet, having followed the national custom and got drunk, had -hastily re-affixed itself to the houses upside down. Although as the -years went on I grew quite attached to Petrograd, I could never rid -myself of this impression of its immense dreariness. This was due to -several causes. There are hardly any stone buildings in the city, -everything is of brick plastered over. Owing to climatic reasons the -houses are not painted, but are daubed with colour-wash. The -successive coats of colour-wash clog all the architectural features, -and give the buildings a shabby look, added to which the wash flakes -off under the winter snows. There is a natural craving {87} in human -nature for colour, and in a country wrapped in snow for at least four -months in the year this craving finds expression in painting the -roofs red, and in besmearing the houses with crude shades of red, -blue, green, and yellow. The result is not a happy one. Again, -owing to the intense cold, the shop-windows are all very small, and -there is but little display in them. Streets and shops were alike -very dimly lighted in my day, and as there is an entire absence of -cafés in Petrograd, there is none of the usual glitter and glare of -these places to brighten up the streets. The theatres make no -display of lights, so it is not surprising that the general effect of -the city is one of intense gloom. The very low, murky winter sky -added to this effect of depression. Peter the Great had planned his -new capital on such a gigantic scale that there were not enough -inhabitants to fill its vast spaces. The conceptions were -magnificent; the results disappointing. Nothing grander could be -imagined than the design of the immense _place_ opposite the Winter -Palace, with Alexander I's great granite monolith towering in the -midst of it, and the imposing semicircular sweep of Government -Offices of uniform design enclosing it, pierced in the centre by a -monumental triumphal arch crowned with a bronze quadriga. The whole -effect of this was spoilt by the hideous crude shade of red with -which the buildings were daubed, by the general untidiness, and by -the broken, uneven pavement; added to which this huge area was -usually untenanted, except by a {88} lumbering cart or two, by a -solitary stray "istvoschik," and an occasional muffled-up pedestrian. -The Petrograd of reality was indeed very different from the sumptuous -city of my dreams. - -For the second time I was extraordinarily lucky in my Chief. Our -relations with Russia had, during the "'seventies," been strained -almost to the breaking point. War had on several occasions seemed -almost inevitable between the two countries. - -Russians, naturally enough, had shown their feelings of hostility to -their potential enemies by practically boycotting the entire British -Embassy. The English Government had then made a very wise choice, -and had appointed to the Petrograd Embassy the one man capable of -smoothing these troubled relations. The late Lord Dufferin was not -then a diplomat by profession. He had just completed his term of -office as Governor-General of Canada, where, as in every position he -had previously occupied, he had been extraordinarily successful. -Lord Dufferin had an inexhaustible fund of patience, blended with the -most perfect tact; he had a charm of manner no human being could -resist; but under it all lay an inflexible will. No man ever -understood better the use of the iron hand under the velvet glove, -and in a twelvemonth from the date of his arrival in Petrograd he had -succeeded not only in gaining the confidence of official Russia, but -also in re-establishing the most cordial relations with Russian -society. In this he was very ably seconded by Lady Dufferin, who -combined a perfectly natural manner with {89} quiet dignity and a -curious individual charm. Both Lord and Lady Dufferin enjoyed -dancing, skating, and tobagganing as wholeheartedly as though they -were children. - -Our Petrograd Embassy was a fine old house, with a pleasant intimate -character about it lacking in the more ornate building at Berlin. It -contained a really beautiful snow-white ball-room, and all the -windows fronted the broad, swift-flowing Neva, with the exquisitely -graceful slender gilded spire of the Fortress Church, towering three -hundred feet aloft, opposite them. We had a very fine collection of -silver plate at the Embassy. This plate, valued at £30,000, was the -property of our Government, and had been sent out sixty years -previously by George IV, who understood the importance attached by -Russians to externals. We had also a small set, just sufficient for -two persons, of real gold plates. These solid gold plates were only -used by the Emperor and Empress on the very rare occasions when they -honoured the Embassy with their presence. I wonder what has happened -to that gold service now! - -Owing to the constant tension of the relations between Great Britain -and Russia, our work at the Petrograd Embassy was very heavy indeed -at that time. We were frequently kept up till 2 a.m. in the -Chancery, cyphering telegrams. All important written despatches -between London and Petrograd either way were sent by Queen's -Messenger open to Berlin, "under Flying Seal," as it is termed. The -Berlin Embassy was thus kept constantly posted as {90} to Russian -affairs. After reading our open despatches, both to and from London, -the Berlin Embassy would seal them up in a special way. We also got -duplicates, in cypher, of all telegrams received in London the -previous day from the Paris, Vienna, Berlin, and Constantinople -Embassies which bore in any way on Russia or the Eastern Question. -This gave us two or three hours' work decyphering every day. Both -cyphering and decyphering require the closest concentration, as one -single mistake may make nonsense of the whole thing; it is -consequently exhausting work. We were perfectly well aware that the -Russian Government had somehow obtained possession of one of our -codes. This particular "compromised code" was only used by us for -transmitting intelligence which the Russians were intended to know. -They could hardly blame us should they derive false impressions from -a telegram of ours which they had decyphered with a stolen code, nor -could they well admit that they had done this. - -As winter came on, I understood why Russians are so fond of gilding -the domes and spires of their churches. It must be remembered that -Petrograd lies on parallel 60° N. In December it only gets four -hours of very uncertain daylight, and the sun is so low on the -horizon that its rays do not reach the streets of the city. It is -then that the gilded domes flash and glitter, as they catch the beams -of the unseen sun. When the long golden needle of the Fortress -Church blazed like a flaming torch {91} or a gleaming spear of fire -against the murky sky, I thought it a splendid sight, as was the -great golden dome of St. Isaac's scintillating like a second sun over -the snow-clad roofs of the houses. - -Soon after my arrival I went to the vast church under the gilded dome -to hear the singing of the far-famed choir of St. Isaac's. - -Here were none of the accessories to which I had been accustomed; no -seats; no organ; no pulpit; no side-chapels. A blue haze of incense -drifted through the twilight of the vague spaces of the great -building; a haze glowing rosily where the red lamps burning before -the jewelled ikons gave a faint-dawnlike effect in the semi-darkness. -Before me the great screen of the "ikonostas" towered to the roof, -with its eight malachite columns forty feet high, and its two smaller -columns of precious lapis lazuli flanking the "Royal doors" into the -sanctuary. Surely Montferrand, the Frenchman, had designedly steeped -the cathedral he had built in perpetual twilight. In broad daylight -the juxtaposition of these costly materials, with their discordant -colours, would have been garish, even vulgar. Now, barely visible in -the shadows, they, the rich mosaics, the masses of heavily-gilt -bronze work in the ikonostas, gave an impression of barbaric -magnificence and immense splendour. The jasper and polychrome -Siberian marbles with which the cathedral was lined, the gold and -silver of the jewelled ikons, gleaming faintly in the candle-light, -strengthened this impression of sumptuous opulence. Then the choir, -standing {92} before the ikonostas, burst into song. The exquisitely -beautiful singing of the Russian Church was a perfect revelation to -me. I would not have believed it possible that unaccompanied human -voices could have produced so entrancing an effect. As the "Cherubic -Hymn" died away in softest _pianissimo_, its echoes floating into the -misty vastness of the dome, a deacon thundered out prayers in a -ringing bass, four tones deeper than those a Western European could -compass. The higher clergy, with their long flowing white beards, -jewelled crowns, and stiffly-archaic vestments of cloth of gold and -silver, seemed to have stepped bodily out of the frame of an ikon; -and the stately ritual of the Eastern Church gave me an impression as -of something of immemorial age, something separated by the gap of -countless centuries from our own prosaic epoch; and through it all -rose again and again the plaintive response of the choir, "Gospodi -pomiloi," "Lord have mercy," exquisitely sung with all the tenderness -and pathos of muted strings. - -This was at last the real Russia of my dreams. It was all as I had -vaguely pictured it to myself; the densely-packed congregation, with -sheepskin-clad peasant and sable-coated noble standing side by side, -all alike joining in the prescribed genuflections and prostrations of -the ritual; the singing-boys, with their close-cropped heads and -curious long blue dressing-gowns; the rolling consonants of the Old -Slavonic chanted by the priests; all this was really Russia, and not -a bastard imitation of an exotic {93} Western civilisation like the -pseudo-classic city outside. - -Two years later, Arthur Sullivan, the composer, happened to be in -Petrograd, and I took him to the practice of the Emperor's private -church choir. Sullivan was passionately devoted to unaccompanied -part-singing, and those familiar with his delightful light operas -will remember how he introduced into almost every one of them an -unaccompanied madrigal, or a sextet. Sullivan told me that he would -not have believed it possible for human voices to obtain the -string-like effect of these Russian choirs. He added that although -six English singing-boys would probably evolve a greater body of -sound than twelve Russian boys, no English choir-boy could achieve -the silvery tone these musical little Muscovites produced. - -People ignorant of the country have a foolish idea that all Russians -can speak French. That may be true of one person in two thousand of -the whole population. The remainder only speak their native Russ. -Not one cabman in Petrograd could understand a syllable of any -foreign language, and though in shops, very occasionally, someone -with a slight knowledge of German might be found, it was rare. All -the waiters in Petrograd restaurants were yellow-faced little -Mohammedan Tartars, speaking only Russian and their own language. I -determined therefore to learn Russian at once, and was fortunate in -finding a very clever teacher. All men should learn a foreign -language from a lady, {94} for natural courtesy makes one listen to -what she is saying; whereas with a male teacher one's attention is -apt to wander. The patient elderly lady who taught me knew neither -English nor French, so we used German as a means of communication. -Thanks to Madame Kumin's intelligence, and a considerable amount of -hard work on my own part, I was able to pass an examination in -Russian in eleven months, and to qualify as Interpreter to the -Embassy. The difficulties of the Russian language are enormously -exaggerated. The pronunciation is hard, as are the terminations; and -the appalling length of Russian words is disconcerting. In Russian, -great emphasis is laid on one syllable of a word, and the rest is -slurred over. It is therefore vitally important (should you wish to -be understood) to get the emphasis on the right syllable, and for -some mysterious reason no foreigner, even by accident, _ever succeeds -in pronouncing a Russian name right_. It is Schouvaloff, not -Schòuvaloff; Brusìl-off, not Brùsiloff; Demìd-off, not Dèmidoff. The -charming dancer's name is Pàv-Lova, not Pavlòva; her equally -fascinating rival is Karsàv-ina, not Karsavìna. I could continue the -list indefinitely. Be sure of one thing; however the name is -pronounced by a foreigner, it is absolutely certain to be wrong. - -What a wise man he was who first said that for every fresh language -you learn you acquire a new pair of eyes and a new pair of ears; I -felt immensely elated when I found that I could read the cabalistic -signs over the shops as easily as English lettering. - -{95} - -A relation of mine had given me a letter of introduction to Princess -B----. Now this old lady, though she but seldom left her own house, -was a very great power indeed in Petrograd, and was universally known -as the "Princesse Château." For some reason or another, I was lucky -enough to find favour in this dignified old lady's eyes. She asked -me to call on her again, and at our second meeting invited me to her -Sunday evenings. The Princesse Château's Sunday evenings were a -thing quite apart. They were a survival in Petrograd of the French -eighteenth century literary "salons," but devoid of the faintest -flavour of pedantry or priggism. Never in my life, before or since, -have I heard such wonderfully brilliant conversation, for, with the -one exception of myself, the Princesse Château tolerated no dull -people at her Sundays. She belonged to a generation that always -spoke French amongst themselves, and imported their entire culture -from France. Peter the Great had designed St. Petersburg as a window -through which to look on Europe, and the tradition of this amongst -the educated classes was long in dying out. The Princess assembled -some thirty people every Sunday, all Russians, with the exception of -myself. These people discussed any and every subject--literature, -art, music, and philosophy--with sparkling wit, keen critical -instinct, and extraordinary felicity of phrase, usually in French, -sometimes in English, and occasionally in Russian. Their knowledge -seemed encyclopædic, and they appeared equally at home in any of the -three {96} languages. They greatly appreciated a neatly-turned -epigram, or a novel, crisply-coined definition. Any topic, however, -touching directly or indirectly on the external or internal policy of -Russia was always tacitly avoided. My _rôle_ was perforce reduced to -that of a listener, but it was a perfectly delightful society. -Princesse Château had a very fine suite of rooms on the first floor -of her house, decorated "at the period" in Louis XVI style by -imported French artists; these rooms still retained their original -furniture and fittings, and were a museum of works of art; but her -Sunday evenings were always held in the charming but -plainly-furnished rooms which she herself inhabited on the ground -floor. We had one distinct advantage over the old French _salons_, -for Princesse Château entertained her guests every Sunday to suppers -which were justly celebrated in the gastronomic world of Petrograd. -During supper the conversation proceeded just as brilliantly as -before. There were always two or three Grand Duchesses present, for -to attend Princesse Château's Sundays was a sort of certificate of -culture. The Grand Duchesses were treated quite unceremoniously, -beyond receiving a perfunctory "Madame" in each sentence addressed to -them. How curious that, both in English and French, the highest -title of respect should be plain "Madame"! As the Russian equivalent -is "Vashoe Imperatorskoe Vuisochestvo," a considerable expenditure of -time and breath was saved by using the terser French term. And -through it all moved the mistress of the house, the stately {97} -little smiling old lady, in her plain black woollen dress and lace -cap, dropping here a quaint criticism, there an apt _bon-mot_. -Perfectly charming people! - -The relatives and friends of Princesse Château whom I met at her -house, when they discovered that I had a genuine liking for their -country, and that I did not criticise details of Russian -administration, were good enough to open their houses to me in their -turn. Though most of these people owned large and very fine houses, -they opened them but rarely to foreigners. They gave, very -occasionally, large entertainments to which they invited half -Petrograd, including the Diplomatic Body, but there they stopped. -They did not care, as a rule, to invite foreigners to share the -intimacy of their family life. I was very fortunate therefore in -having an opportunity of seeing a phase of Russian life which few -foreigners have enjoyed. Russians seldom do things by halves. I do -not believe that in any other country in the world could a stranger -have been made to feel himself so thoroughly at home amongst people -of a different nationality, and with such totally different racial -ideals; or have been treated with such constant and uniform kindness. -There was no ceremony whatever on either side, and on the Russian -side, at times, an outspokenness approaching bluntness. As I got to -know these cultivated, delightful people well, I grew very fond of -them. They formed a clique, possibly a narrow clique, amongst -themselves, and had that complete disregard for outside criticism -which is often found associated with {98} persons of established -position. They met almost nightly at each others' houses, and I -could not but regret that such beautiful and vast houses should be -seen by so few people. One house, in particular, contained a -staircase an exact replica of a Grecian temple in white statuary -Carrara marble, a thing of exquisite beauty. In their perpetual sets -of intellectual lawn tennis, if I may coin the term, the superiority -of the feminine over the male intellects was very marked. This is, I -believe, a characteristic of all Slavonic countries, and I recalled -Bismarck's dictum that the Slav peoples were essentially feminine, -and I wondered whether there could be any connection between the two -points. Living so much with Russians, it was impossible not to fall -into the Russian custom of addressing them by their Christian names -and patronymics; such as "Maria Vladimirovna" (Mary daughter of -Vladimir) or "Olga Andreèvna" (Olga daughter of Andrew) or "Pavel -Alexandrovitch" (Paul son of Alexander). I myself became Feòdor -Yàkovlevitch, (Frederic son of James, those being the nearest Russian -equivalents). On arriving at a house, the proper form of inquiry to -the hall porter was, "Ask Mary daughter of Vladimir if she will -receive Frederic son of James." In due time the answer came, "Mary -daughter of Vladimir begs Frederic son of James to go upstairs." My -own servants always addressed me punctiliously as Feòdor -Yàkovlevitch. On giving them an order they would answer in Moscovite -fashion, "I hear you, Frederic son of James," {99} the equivalent to -our prosaic, "Very good, sir." Amongst my new friends, as at the -Princesse Château's, no allusions whatever, direct or indirect, were -made to internal conditions in Russia. Apart from the fact that one -of these new friends was himself Minister of the Interior at the -time, it would not have been safe. In those days the Secret Police, -or "Third Section," as they were called, were very active, and their -ramifications extended everywhere. One night at a supper party a -certain Countess B---- criticised in very open and most unflattering -terms a lady to whom the Emperor Alexander II was known to be -devotedly attached. Next morning at 8 a.m. the Countess was awakened -by her terrified maid, who told her that the "Third Section" were -there and demanded instant admittance. Two men came into the -Countess's bedroom and informed her that their orders were that she -was to take the 12.30 train to Europe that morning. They would -remain with her till then, and would accompany her to the frontier. -As she would not be allowed to return to Russia for twelve months, -they begged her to order her maid to pack what was necessary; and no -one knew better than Countess B---- how useless any attempted -resistance would be. - -This episode made a great stir at the time. As the words complained -of had been uttered about 3 a.m., the police action had been -remarkably prompt. The informant must have driven straight from the -supper party to the "Third Section," and {100} everyone in Petrograd -had a very distinct idea who the informant was. Is it necessary to -add that she was a lady? - -Some of my new friends volunteered to propose and second me for the -Imperial Yacht Club. This was not the club that the diplomats -usually joined; it was a purely Russian club, and, in spite of its -name, had no connection with yachting. It had also the reputation of -being extremely exclusive, but thanks to my Russian sponsors, I got -duly elected to it. This was, I am sure, the most delightful club in -Europe. It was limited to 150 members of whom only two, besides -myself, were foreigners, and the most perfect _camaraderie_ existed -between the members. The atmosphere of the place was excessively -friendly and intimate, and the building looked more like a private -house than a club, as deceased members had bequeathed to it pictures, -a fine collection of old engravings, some splendid old Beauvais -tapestry, and a great deal of Oriental porcelain. Above all, we -commanded the services of the great Armand, prince of French chefs. -Associating so much with Russians, it was possible to see things from -their points of view. They all had an unshakable belief in the -absolute invincibility of Russia, and in her complete -invulnerability, for it must not be forgotten that in 1880 Russia had -never yet been defeated in any campaign, except partially in the -Crimean War of 1854-50. My friends did not hide their convictions -that it was Russia's manifest destiny to absorb in {101} time the -whole of the Asiatic Continent, including India, China, and Turkey. -There were grounds for this article of faith, for in 1880 Russia's -bloodless absorption of vast territories in Central Asia had been -astounding. It was not until the Russo-Japanese War of 1904-1905 -that the friable clay feet of the Northern Colossus were revealed to -the outside world, though those with a fairly intimate knowledge of -the country quite realised how insecure were the foundations on which -the stupendous structure of modern Russia had been erected. - -I am deeply thankful that the great majority of my old friends had -passed away in the ordinary course of nature before the Great -Catastrophe overwhelmed the mighty Empire in which they took such -deep pride; and that they were spared the sight and knowledge of the -awful orgy of blood, murder, and spoliation which followed the ruin -of the land they loved so well. Were they not now at rest, it would -be difficult for me to write of those old days. - -To grasp the Russian mentality, it must be remembered that they are -essentially Orientals. Russia is not the most Eastern outpost of -Western civilisation; it is the most Western outpost of the East. -Russians have all the qualities of the Oriental, his fatalism, his -inertness, and, I fear, his innate pecuniary corruption. Their -fatalism makes them accept their destiny blindly. What has been -ordained from the beginning of things is useless to fight against; it -must be accepted. The same {102} inertness characterises every -Eastern nation, and the habit of "baksheesh" is ingrained in the -Oriental blood. If the truth were known, we should probably find -that the real reason why Cain killed Abel was that the latter had -refused him a commission on some transaction or other. The fatalism -and lack of initiative are not the only Oriental traits in the -Russian character. In a hundred little ways they show their origin: -in their love of uncut jewels; in their lack of sense of time (the -Russian for "at once" is "si chas," which means "this hour"; an -instructive commentary); in the reluctance South Russians show in -introducing strangers to the ladies of their household, the Oriental -peeps out everywhere. Peter the Great could order his Boyards to -abandon their fur-trimmed velvet robes, to shave off their beards, -powder their heads, and array themselves in the satins and brocades -of Versailles. He could not alter the men and women inside the -French imported finery. He could abandon his old capital, matchless, -many-pinnacled Moscow, vibrant with every instinct of Russian -nationality; he could create a new pseudo-Western, sham-classical -city in the frozen marshes of the Neva; but even the Autocrat could -not change the souls of his people. Easterns they were, Easterns -they remained, and that is the secret of Russia, they are not -Europeans. Peter himself was so fully aware of the racial -limitations of his countrymen that he imported numbers of foreigners -to run the country; Germans as Civil and Military administrators; -{103} Dutchmen as builders and town-planners; and Englishmen to -foster its budding commerce. To the latter he granted special -privileges, and even in my time there was a very large English -commercial community in Petrograd; a few of them descendants of Peter -the Great's pioneers; the majority of them with hereditary business -connections with Russia. Their special privileges had gradually been -withdrawn, but the official name of the English Church in Petrograd -was still "British Factory in St. Petersburg," surely a curious title -for a place of worship. The various German-Russian families from the -Baltic Provinces, the Adlerbergs, the Benckendorffs, and the -Stackelbergs, had served Russia well. Under their strong guidance -she became a mighty Power, but when under Alexander III the reins of -government were confided to purely Russian hands, rapid deterioration -set in. This dreamy nation lacks driving power. In my time, the -very able Minister for Foreign Affairs, M. de Giers, was of German -origin, and his real name was Hirsch. His extremely wily and astute -second in command, Baron Jomini, was a Swiss. Modern Russia was -largely the creation of the foreigner. - -I saw a great deal, too, of a totally different stratum of Russian -society. Mr. X., the head of a large exporting house, was of British -origin, the descendant of one of Peter's commercial pioneers. He -himself, like his father and grandfather, had been born in Russia, -and though he retained his English speech, he had adopted all the -points of {104} view of the country of his birth. Madame X. came of -a family of the so-called "Intelligenzia." Most of her relatives -seemed to have undertaken compulsory journeys to Siberia, not as -prisoners, but for a given term of exile. Madame X.'s brother-in-law -owned and edited a paper of advanced views, which was being -continually suppressed, and had been the cause of two long trips -eastward for its editor and proprietor. Neither Mr. nor Madame X. -shared their relatives' extreme views. What struck me was that -behind the floods of vehement invective of Madame O---- (the editor's -wife) there was never the smallest practical suggestion. "You say, -Madame O----," I would hazard, "that the existing state of things is -intolerable. What remedy do you suggest?" "I am not the -Government," would retort Madame O---- with great heat. "It is for -the Government to make suggestions. I only denounce an abominable -injustice." "Quite so, Madame O----, but how can these conditions be -improved. What is your programme of reform?" "We have nothing to do -with reforms. Our mission is to destroy utterly. Out of the ruins a -better state of things must necessarily arise; as nothing could -possibly be worse than present conditions." And so we travelled -round and round in a circle. Mr. O----, when appealed to, would -blink through his spectacles with his kindly old eyes, and emit a -torrent of admirable moral aphorisms, which might serve as -unimpeachable copy-book headings, but had no bearing whatever {105} -on the subject we were discussing. Never once amidst these floods of -bitter invective and cataracts of fierce denunciation did I hear one -single practical suggestion made or any outline traced of a scheme to -better existing conditions. "We must destroy," shouted Madame O----, -and there her ideas stopped. I think the Slavonic bent of mind, like -the Celtic, is purely _des_tructive, and has little or no -_con_structive power in it. This may be due to the ineradicable -element of the child in both races. They are "Peter Pans," and a -child loves destruction. - -Poor dreamy, emotional, hopelessly unpractical Russia! Madame -O----'s theories have been put into effect now, and we all know how -appalling the result has been. - -These conversations were always carried on in French for greater -safety in order that the servants might not overhear, but when Mr. -and Madame O---- found difficulties in expressing themselves in that -language, they both broke into torrents of rapid Russian, to poor -Madame X.'s unconcealed terror. The danger was a real one, for the -O----'s were well known in police circles as revolutionists, and it -must have gone hard with the X.'s had their servants reported to the -police the violent opinions that had been expressed in their house. - -Many of the Diplomatic Body were in the habit of attending the -midnight Mass at St. Isaac's on Easter Day, on account of the -wonderfully impressive character of the service. We were always -{106} requested to come in full uniform, with decorations and we -stood inside the rails of the ikonostas, behind the choir. The time -to arrive was about 11.30 p.m., when the great church, packed to its -doors by a vast throng, was wrapped in almost total darkness. Under -the dome stood a catafalque bearing a gilt coffin. This open coffin -contained a strip of silk, on which was painted an effigy of the dead -Christ, for it will be remembered that no carved or graven image is -allowed in a church of the Eastern rite. There was an arrangement by -which a species of blind could be drawn over the painted figure, thus -concealing it. As the eye grew accustomed to the shadows, tens of -thousands of unlighted candles, outlining the arches, cornices, and -other architectural features of the cathedral, were just visible. -These candles each had their wick touched with kerosine and then -surrounded with a thread of guncotton, which ran continuously from -candle to candle right round the building. When the hanging end of -the thread of gun-cotton was lighted, the flame ran swiftly round the -church, kindling each candle in turn; a very fascinating sight. At -half-past eleven, the only light was from the candles surrounding the -bier, where black-robed priests were chanting the mournful Russian -Office for the Dead. At about twenty minutes to twelve the blind was -drawn over the dead Christ, and the priests, feigning surprise, -advanced to the rails of the ikonostas, and announced to an -Archimandrite that the coffin was empty. The Archimandrite ordered -them {107} to search round the church, and the priests perambulated -the church with gilt lanterns, during which time the catafalque, -bier, and its accessories were all removed. The priests announced to -the Archimandrite that their search had been unsuccessful, whereupon -he ordered them to make a further search outside the church. They -went out, and so timed their return as to arrive before the ikonostas -at three minutes before midnight. They again reported that they had -been unsuccessful; when, as the first stroke of midnight pealed from -the great clock, the Metropolitan of Petrograd announced in a loud -voice, "Christ is risen!" At an electric signal given from the -cathedral, the great guns of the fortress boomed out in a salute of -one hundred and one guns; the gun-cotton was touched off, and the -swift flash kindled the tens of thousands of candles running round -the building; the enormous congregation lit the tapers they carried; -the "Royal doors" of the ikonostas were thrown open, and the clergy -appeared in their festival vestments of cloth of gold, as the choir -burst into the beautiful Russian Easter anthem, and so the Easter -Mass began. Nothing more poignantly dramatic, more magnificently -impressive, could possibly be imagined than this almost instantaneous -change from intense gloom to blazing light; from the plaintive dirges -of the Funeral Service to the jubilant strains of the Easter Mass. I -never tired of witnessing this splendid piece of symbolism. - -It sounds almost irreverent to talk of comical {108} incidents in -connection with so solemn an occasion, but there are two little -episodes I must mention. About 1880 the first tentative efforts were -made by France to establish a Franco-Russian alliance. Ideas on the -subject were very nebulous at first, but slowly they began to -crystallise into concrete shape. A new French Ambassador was -appointed to Petrograd in the hope of fanning the faint spark into -further life. He, wishing to show his sympathy for the _nation -amie_, attended the Easter Mass at St. Isaac's, but unfortunately he -was quite unversed in the ritual of the Orthodox Church. In every -ikonostas there are two ikons on either side of the "Royal doors"; -the Saviour on one side, the Madonna and Child on the other. The new -Ambassador was standing in front of the ikon of the Saviour, and in -the course of the Mass the Metropolitan came out, and made the three -prescribed low bows before the ikon, previous to censing it. The -Ambassador, taking this as a personal compliment to France, as -represented in his own person, acknowledged the attention with three -equally low bows, laying his hand on his heart and ejaculating with -all the innate politeness of his nation, "Monsieur! Monsieur! -Monsieur!" This little incident caused much amusement, as did a -newly-arrived German diplomat, who when greeted by a Russian friend -with the customary Easter salutation of "Christ is risen!" ("Kristos -voskress!") wished to respond, but, being ignorant of the traditional -answer, "He is verily risen," merely made {109} a low bow and said, -"Ich auch," which may be vulgarly Englished into "The same here." - -The universal Easter suppers at the conclusion of the Mass play an -important part in Russian life, for they mean the breaking of the -long and rigorous Lenten fast of the Eastern Church, during which all -meat, butter, milk, and eggs are prohibited. The peasants adhere -rigidly to these rules, so the Easter supper assumes great importance -in their eyes. The ingredients of this supper are invariable for -high and low, for rich and poor--cold ham, hard-boiled eggs dyed red, -a sort of light cake akin to the French _brioche_, and a sour -cream-cheese shaped into a pyramid and decorated with little crosses -of dried currants. I think that this cake and cream cheese (known as -"Paskva") are prepared only at Easter-time. Even at the Yacht Club -during Holy Week, meat, butter, milk, and eggs were prohibited, and -still Armand, our incomparable French chef, managed to produce -_plats_ of the most succulent description. Loud praises were -lavished upon his skill in preparing such excellent dishes out of -oil, fish, flour, and vegetables, the only materials allowed him. I -met Armand in the passage one day and asked him how he managed to do -it. Looking round to see that no Russians could overhear, Armand -replied with a wink, "Voyez-vous Monsieur, le bon Dieu ne regarde pas -d'aussi près." Of course he had gone on using cream, butter, and -eggs, just as usual, but as the members of the Club did not know -this, and thought {110} that they were strictly obeying the rules of -their Church, I imagine that no blame could attach to them. - -On Easter Eve the two-mile-long Nevsky Perspective was lined with -humble folks standing by white napkins on which the materials for -their Easter supper were arranged. On every napkin glimmered a -lighted taper, and the long line of these twinkling lights produced a -very charming effect, as of myriads of glow-worms. Priests would -pass swiftly down the line, each attended by an acolyte carrying a -pail of holy water. The priest would mutter a rapid blessing, -sprinkle the food and its owner with holy water, pocket an -infinitesimally small fee, and pass on again. - -A friend of mine was once down in the fruit-growing districts of the -Crimea. Passing through one of the villages of that pleasing -peninsula, he found it decorated in honour of a religious festival. -The village priest was going to bless the first-fruits of the -orchards. The peasants stood in a row down the village street, each -one with the first crop of his orchard arranged on a clean napkin -before him. The red-bearded priest, quite a young man, passed down -the street, sprinkling fruit and grower alike with holy water, and -repeating a blessing to each one. The young priest approached, and -my friend could hear quite plainly the words of his blessing. No. ----- it was quite impossible! It was incredible! and yet he could -not doubt the evidence of his own ears! The young priest was -speaking in good Scots, {111} and the words of the blessing he -bestowed on each parishioner were, "Here, man! tak' it. If it does -ye nae guid, it canna possibly dae ye any hairm." The men addressed, -probably taking this for a quotation from Scripture in some unknown -tongue, bowed reverently as the words were pronounced over them. -That a Russian village priest in a remote district of the Crimea -should talk broad Scots was a sufficiently unusual circumstance to -cause my friend to make some further inquiries. It then appeared -that when the Government dockyard at Sebastopol was reopened, several -Scottish foremen from the Clyde shipbuilding yards were imported to -supervise the Russian workmen. Amongst others came a Glasgow foreman -with his wife and a son who was destined for the ministry of the Free -Church of Scotland. Once arrived in Russia, they found that -facilities for training a youth for the Presbyterian ministry were -somewhat lacking in Sebastopol. Sooner than sacrifice their dearest -wish, the parents, with commendable broadmindedness, decided that -their offspring should enter the Russian Church. He was accordingly -sent to a seminary and in due course was ordained a priest and -appointed to a parish, but he apparently still retained his Scottish -speech and his characteristically Scottish independence of view. - -After a year in Petrograd I used to attempt to analyse to myself the -complex Russian character. "We are a 'jelly-folk,'" had said one of -my friends to me. The Russian term was "Kiselnui {112} narod," and I -think there is truth in that. They _are_ an invertebrate folk. I -cannot help thinking that Peter the Great was one of the worst -enemies of his own country. Instead of allowing Russia to develop -naturally on lines suited to the racial instincts of her people, he -attempted to run the whole country into a West European mould, and to -superimpose upon it a veneer imported from the France of Louis -Quatorze. With the very few this could perhaps succeed, with the -many it was a foregone failure. He tried in one short lifetime to do -what it had taken other countries centuries to accomplish. He built -a vast and imposing edifice on shifting sand, without any -foundations. It might stand for a time; its ultimate doom was -certain. - -From the windows of our Embassy we looked upon the broad Neva. When -fast bound in the grip of winter, sledge-roads were made across the -ice, bordered with lamp-posts and marked out with sawn-off fir trees. -Little wooden taverns and tea-houses were built on the river, and as -soon as the ice was of sufficient thickness the tramcar lines were -laid across it. A colony of Laps came yearly and encamped on the -river with their reindeer, for the temperature of Petrograd rarely -falling more than ten degrees below zero, it was looked upon as a -genial winter climate for invalids from Lapland. A stranger from -another planet might have imagined that these buildings were -permanent, that the fir trees were really growing, and that all the -life {113} on the frozen river would last indefinitely. Everyone -knew, though, with absolute certainty that by the middle of April the -ice would break up, and that these little houses, if not removed in -time, would be carried away and engulfed in the liberated stream. By -May the river would be running again as freely as though these -temporary edifices had never been built on it. - -I think these houses built on the ice were very typical of Russia. - - - - -{114} - -CHAPTER IV - -The Winter Palace--Its interior--Alexander II--A Russian Court -Ball--The "Bals des Palmiers"--The Empress--The blessing of the -Neva--Some curiosities of the Winter Palace--The great Orloff -diamond--My friend the Lady-in-Waiting--Sugared Compensations--The -attempt on the Emperor's life of 1880--Some unexpected finds in the -Palace--A most hilarious funeral--Sporting expeditions--Night drives -through the forest in mid-winter--Wolves--A typical Russian -village--A peasant's house--"Deaf and dumb people"--The inquisitive -peasant youth--Curiosity about strangers--An embarrassing -situation--A still more awkward one--Food difficulties--A bear -hunt--My first bear--Alcoholic consequences--My liking for the -Russian peasant--The beneficent india-rubber Ikon--Two curious -sporting incidents--Village habits--The great gulf fixed between -Russian nobility and peasants. - - -The Winter Palace drags its lengthy, uninteresting façade for some -five hundred feet along the quays of the Neva. It presents a mere -wearisome iteration of the same architectural features repeated again -and again, and any effect it might produce is marred by the hideous -shade of that crude red, called by the Russians "raspberry colour," -with which it is daubed, and for which they have so misplaced an -affection. - -{115} - -The interior of the Winter Palace was burned out in 1837, and only a -few of the original State rooms survive. These surviving rooms are -the only ones of any artistic interest, as the other innumerable and -stupendous halls were all reconstructed during the "period of bad -taste," and bear ample witness to that fact in every detail of their -ornamentation. - -The Ambassadors' staircase, part of the original building, is very -dignified and imposing with its groups of statuary, painted ceiling, -and lavish decoration, as is Peter the Great's Throne room, with -jasper columns, and walls hung with red velvet worked in gold with -great Russian two-headed eagles. All the tables, chairs, and -chandeliers in this room were of solid silver. - -St. George's Hall, another of the old rooms, I thought splendid, with -its pure white marble walls and columns and rich adornments of gilt -bronze, and there was also an agreeably barbaric hall with entirely -gilt columns, many banners, and gigantic effigies of ancient Russian -warriors. All these rooms were full of collections of the gold and -silver-gilt trays on which the symbolical "bread and salt" had been -offered to different Emperors in the various towns of their dominions. - -The fifty or so other modern rooms were only remarkable for their -immense size, the Nicholas Hall, for instance, being 200 feet long -and 65 feet wide, though the so-called "Golden Hall" positively -dazzled one with its acre or so of gilding. It would have been a -happy idea for the Emperor to {116} assemble all the leading -financiers of Europe to dine together in the "Golden Hall." The -sight of so much of the metal which they had spent their whole lives -in amassing would have gratified the financiers, and would probably -have stimulated them to fresh exertions. - -The Emperor Alexander II always received the diplomats in Peter the -Great's Throne room, seated on Peter's throne. He was a wonderfully -handsome man even in his old age, with a most commanding manner, and -an air of freezing hauteur. When addressing junior members of the -Diplomatic Body there was something in his voice and a look in his -eye reminiscent of the Great Mogul addressing an earthworm. - -I have only seen three Sovereigns who looked their parts quite -unmistakably: Alexander II of Russia, William I of Germany, and Queen -Victoria. In Queen Victoria's case it was the more remarkable, as -she was very short. Yet this little old lady in her plain dress, had -the most inimitable dignity, and no one could have mistaken her for -anything but a Queen. I remember Queen Victoria attending a concert -at the Albert Hall in 1887, two months before the Jubilee -celebrations. The vast building was packed to the roof, and the -Queen received a tremendous ovation. No one who saw it can ever -forget how the little old lady advanced to the front of her box and -made two very low sweeping curtsies to the right and to the left of -her with incomparable dignity and grace, as she smiled {117} through -her tears on the audience in acknowledgment of the thunders of -applause that greeted her. Queen Victoria was always moved to tears -when she received an unusually cordial ovation from her people, for -they loved her, and she loved them. - -The scale of everything in the Winter Palace was so vast that it is -difficult to compare the Court entertainments there with those -elsewhere. - -Certainly the Russian ladies looked well in their uniform costumes. -The cut, shape, and style of these dresses never varied, be the -fashions what they might. The dress, once made, lasted the owner for -her lifetime, though with advancing years it might possibly require -to be readjusted to an expanding figure. They were enormously -expensive to start with--anything from £300 to £1,200. There was a -complete under-dress of white satin, heavily embroidered. Over this -was worn a velvet dress lavishly trimmed with dark fur. This velvet -dress might be of dull red, dark blue, green, or brown, according to -the taste of the wearer. It had to have a long train embroidered -with gold or silver flowers, or both mixed, as the owner's fancy -dictated. On the head was worn the "Kakoshnik," the traditional -Russian head-dress, in the form of a crescent. In the case of -married women the "Kakoshnik" might be of diamonds, or any gems they -fancied, or could compass; for girls the "Kakoshnik" must be of white -silk. Girls, too, had to wear white, without the velvet over-dress. -The usual fault of Russian faces is their undue breadth across the -cheek-bones, {118} and the white "Kakoshnik" worn by the unmarried -girls seemed to me to emphasize this defect, whereas a blazing -semicircle of diamonds made a most becoming setting for an older -face, although at times, as in other cases, the setting might be more -ornamental than the object it enshrined. Though the Russian uniforms -were mostly copied from German models, the national lack of attention -to detail was probably to blame for the lack of effect they produced -when compared with their Prussian originals. - -There was always something a little slovenly in the way in which the -Russian uniforms were worn, though an exception must be made in the -case of the resplendent "Chevaliers Gardes," and of the "Gardes à -Cheval." The uniforms of these two crack cavalry regiments was -closely copied from that of the Prussian "Gardes du Corps" and was -akin to that of our own Life Guards and Royal Horse Guards; the same -leather breeches and long jack-boots, and the same cuirasses; the -tunics, though were white, instead of the scarlet or blue of their -English prototypes. The "Chevaliers Gardes" had silvered cuirasses -and helmets surmounted with the Russian eagle, whereas those of the -"Gardes à Cheval" were gilt. As we know, "all that glitters is not -gold," and in spite of their gilding the "Gardes à Cheval" were -considered very inferior socially to their rivals. The Emperor's -fiercely-moustached Circassian bodyguard struck an agreeably exotic -note with their grass-green trousers and long blue kaftans, covered -with rows of Persian {119} cartridge-holders in _niello_ of black and -silver. Others of the Circassians wore coats of chain mail over -their kaftans, and these kaftans were always sleeveless, showing the -bright green, red, or blue silk shirtsleeves of their wearers. -Another pleasant barbaric touch. - -To my mind, the smartest uniforms were those of the Cossack officers; -baggy green knickerbockers thrust into high boots, a hooked-and-eyed -green tunic without a single button or a scrap of gold lace on it, -and a plain white silk belt. No one could complain of a lack of -colour at a Petrograd Palace ball. The Russian civil and Court -uniforms were ingeniously hideous with their white trousers and long -frock-coats covered with broad transverse bars of gold lace. The -wearers of these ugly garments always looked to me like walking -embodiments of what are known in commercial circles as "gilt-edged -securities." As at Berlin, there were hosts of pages at these -entertainments. These lads were all attired like miniature -"Chevalier Gardes," in leather breeches and jack-boots, and wore -gold-laced green tunics; a singularly unpractical dress, I should -have thought, for a growing boy. All Russians of a certain social -position were expected to send their sons to be educated at the -"School for Imperial Pages," which was housed in an immense and -ornate building and counted four hundred pupils. Wise parents -mistrusted the education "aux pages" for their sons, knowing that, -however little else they might learn there, they would be certain to -acquire {120} habits of gross extravagance; the prominence, too, into -which these boys were thrust at Court functions tended to make them -unduly precocious. - -The smaller Court balls were known as "Les Bals des Palmiers." On -these occasions, a hundred large palm trees, specially grown for the -purpose at Tsarskoe Selo, were brought by road from there in huge -vans. Round the palm in its tub supper tables were built, each one -accommodating fifteen people. It was really an extraordinarily -pretty sight seeing these rows of broad-fronted palms down the great -Nicholas Hall, and the knowledge that a few feet away there was an -outside temperature of 5° below zero added piquancy to the sight of -these exiles from the tropics waving their green plumes so far away -in the frozen North. At the "Bals des Palmiers" it was Alexander -II's custom to make the round of the tables as soon as his guests -were seated. The Emperor would go up to a table, the occupants of -which of course all rose at his approach, say a few words to one or -two of them, and then eat either a small piece of bread or a little -fruit, and just put his lips to a glass of champagne, in order that -his guests might say that he had eaten and drank with them. A -delicate and graceful attention! - -As electric light had not then been introduced into the palace, the -entire building was lighted with wax candles. I cannot remember the -number I was told was required on these occasions, but I think it was -over one hundred thousand. The candles were all lighted with a -thread of gun-cotton, as in St. Isaac's Cathedral. - -{121} - -The Empress appeared but very rarely. It was a matter of common -knowledge that she was suffering from an incurable disease. All the -rooms in which she lived were artificially impregnated with oxygen, -continuously released from cylinders in which the gas had been -compressed. This, though it relieved the lungs of the sufferer, -proved very trying to the Empress's ladies-in-waiting, as this -artificial atmosphere with its excess of oxygen after an hour or so -gave them all violent headaches and attacks of giddiness. - -In spite of the characteristic Russian carelessness about details, -these Petrograd Palace entertainments provided a splendid glittering -pageant to the eye, for the stage was so vast and the number of -performers so great. There was not the same blaze of diamonds as in -London, but I should say that the individual jewels were far finer. -A stone must be very perfect to satisfy the critical Russian eye, -and, true to their Oriental blood, the ladies preferred unfaceted -rubies, sapphires, and emeralds. Occasional Emirs from Central Asia -served, as do the Indian princes at Buckingham Palace, as a reminder -that Russia's responsibilities, like those of Great Britain, did not -cease with her European frontiers. - -Once a year the diplomats had much the best of the situation. This -was at the blessing of the waters of the Neva--"the Jordan," as -Russians called it--on January 6, old style, or January 18, according -to our reckoning. We saw the ceremonies through the double windows -of the great steam-heated Nicholas {122} Hall, whereas the Emperor -and all the Grand Dukes had to stand bareheaded in the snow outside. -A great hole was cut in the ice of the Neva, with a temporary chapel -erected over it. At the conclusion of the religious service, the -Metropolitan of Petrograd solemnly blessed the waters of the river, -and dipped a great golden cross into them. - -A cordon of soldiers had to guard the opening in the ice until it -froze over again, in order to prevent fanatical peasants from bathing -in the newly-consecrated waters. Many had lost their lives in this -way. - -A friend of mine, the Director of the Hermitage Gallery, offered to -take me all over the Winter Palace, and the visit occupied nearly an -entire day. The maze of rooms was so endless that the mind got a -little bewildered and surfeited with the sight of so many splendours. -A detail that amused me was a small library on the second floor, -opening on to an avenue of lime trees. One of the Empresses had -chosen for her private library this room on the second floor, looking -into a courtyard. She had selected it on account of its quiet, but -expressed a wish to have an avenue of trees, under which to walk in -the intervals of her studies. The room being on the second floor, -and looking into a yard, the wish appeared to be difficult to -execute, but in those days the word "impossible" did not exist for an -Empress of Russia. The entire courtyard was filled in with earth, -and full-grown lime trees transplanted there. When I saw this aerial -grove eighty years afterwards, {123} there was quite a respectable -avenue of limes on the second floor of the building, with a gravel -walk bordered by grass-plots beneath them. Another Empress wished to -have a place to walk in during the winter months, so a very ingenious -hanging winter-garden was contrived for her, following all the -exterior angles of the building. It was not in the least like an -ordinary conservatory, but really did recall an outdoor garden. -There were gravel walks, and lawns of lycopodium simulating grass; -there were growing orange trees, and quite large palms. For some -reason the creepers on the walls of this pseudo-garden were all -artificial, being very cleverly made out of painted sheet-iron. - -I had an opportunity later of seeing the entire Winter Palace -collection of silver plate, and all the Crown jewels, when they were -arranged for the inspection of the late Duke of Edinburgh, who was -good enough to invite me to come. There were enormous quantities of -plate, of Russian, French, and English make, sufficient to stock -every silversmith's shop in London. Some of the English plate was of -William and Mary's and Queen Anne's date, and there were some fine -early Georgian pieces. They, would, I confess, have appeared to -greater advantage had they conveyed the idea that they had been -occasionally cleaned. As it was, they looked like dull pewter that -had been neglected for twenty years. Of the jewels, the only things -I remember were a superb "corsage" of diamonds and aquamarines--not -the pale green stones we {124} associate with the name, but immense -stones of that bright blue tint, so highly prized in Russia--and -especially the great Orloff diamond. The "corsage" was big enough to -make a very ample cuirass for the most stalwart of lifeguardsmen, and -the Orloff diamond formed the head of the Russian Imperial sceptre. -The history of the Orloff, or Lazareff, diamond is quite interesting. -Though by no means the largest, it is considered the most perfect -diamond in the world, albeit it has a slight flaw in it. Originally -stolen from India, it came into the hands of an Armenian called -Lazareff in some unknown manner about A.D. 1750. Lazareff, so the -story goes, devised a novel hiding-place for the great stone. Making -a deep incision into the calf of his leg, he placed the diamond in -the cavity, and lay in bed for three months till the wound was -completely healed over. He then started for Amsterdam, and though -stripped and searched several times during his journey, for he was -strongly suspected of having the stone concealed about his person, -its hiding-place was never discovered. At Amsterdam Lazareff had the -wound reopened by a surgeon, and the diamond extracted. He then sold -it to Count Orloff for 450,000 roubles, or roughly £45,000, and -Orloff in his turn made a present of the great stone to Catherine the -Great. The diamond is set under a jewelled Russian eagle at the -extremity of the sceptre, where it probably shows to greater -advantage than it did when concealed for six months in the calf of an -Armenian's leg. - -{125} - -The accommodation provided for the suites of the Imperial family is -hardly on a par with the magnificence of the rest of the palace. The -Duchess of Edinburgh, daughter of Alexander II, made a yearly visit -to Petrograd, as long as her mother the Empress was alive. As the -Duchess's lady-in-waiting happened to be one of my oldest friends, -during her stay I was at the palace at least three days a week, and I -retain vivid recollections of the dreary, bare, whitewashed vault -assigned to her as a sitting-room. The only redeeming feature of -this room was a five-storied glass tray packed with some fifty -varieties of the most delicious _bon-bons_ the mind of man could -conceive. These were all fresh-baked every day by the palace -confectioner, and the tray was renewed every morning. There were -some sixty of these trays prepared daily, and their arrangement was -always absolutely identical, precisely the same number of caramels -and _fondants_ being placed on each shelf of the tray. Everyone knew -that the palace confectioner owned a fashionable sweet shop on the -Nevsky, where he traded under a French name, and I imagine that his -shop was entirely stocked from the remains of the palace trays. - -In the spring of 1880 an attempt was made on Alexander's II's life by -a bomb which completely wrecked the white marble private dining-room. -The Emperor's dinner hour was 7, and the bomb was timed to explode at -7.20 p.m. The Emperor happened at the time to be overwhelmed with -work, and at the last moment he postponed dinner until 7.30. {126} -The bomb exploded at the minute it had been timed for, killing many -of the servants. My poor friend the lady-in-waiting was passing -along the corridor as the explosion occurred. She fell unhurt -amongst the wreckage, but the shock and the sight of the horribly -mangled bodies of the servants were too much for her. She never -recovered from their effects, and died in England within a year. -After this crime, the Winter Palace was thoroughly searched from -cellars to attics, and some curious discoveries were made. - -Some of the countless moujiks employed in the palace had vast -unauthorized colonies of their relatives living with them on the top -floor of the building. In one bedroom a full-grown cow was found, -placidly chewing the cud. One of the moujiks had smuggled it in as a -new-born calf, had brought it up by hand, and afterwards fed it on -hay purloined from the stables. Though it may have kept his family -well provided with milk, stabling a cow in a bedroom unprovided with -proper drainage, on the top floor of a building, is not a proceeding -to be unduly encouraged; nor does it tend to add to the sanitary -amenities of a palace. - -Russians are fond of calling the Nevsky "the street of toleration," -for within a third of a mile of its length a Dutch Calvinist, a -German Lutheran, a Roman Catholic, and an Armenian church rise almost -side by side. "Nevsky" is, of course, only the adjective of "Neva," -and the street is termed "Perspective" in French and "Prospect" in -Russian. - -{127} - -Close to the Armenian church lived M. Delyanoff, who was the Minister -of Education in those days. Both M. and Madame Delyanoff were -exceedingly hospitable and kind to the Diplomatic Body, so, when M. -Delyanoff died, most of the diplomats attended his funeral, -appearing, according to Russian custom, in full uniform. The -Delyanoffs being Armenians, the funeral took place in the Armenian -church, and none of us had had any previous experience of the -extraordinary noises which pass for singing amongst Armenians. When -six individuals appeared and began bleating like sheep, and followed -this by an excellent imitation of hungry wolves howling, it was too -much for us. We hastily composed our features into the decorum the -occasion demanded, amid furtive little snorts of semi-suppressed -laughter. After three grey-bearded priests had stepped from behind -the ikonostas, and, putting their chins up in the air, proceeded to -yelp together in unison, exactly like dogs baying the moon, the -entire Corps Diplomatique broke down utterly. Never have I seen men -laugh so unrestrainedly. As we had each been given a large lighted -candle, the movements of our swaying bodies were communicated to the -tapers, and showers of melted wax began flying in all directions. -With the prudence of the land of my birth, I placed myself against a -pillar, so as to have no one behind me, but each time the three -grey-beards recommenced their comical howling, I must have scattered -perfect Niagaras of wax on to the embroidered coat-tails {128} and -extensive back of the Swedish Minister in front of me. I should -think that I must have expended the combined labours of several hives -of bees on his garments, congratulating myself the while that that -genial personage, not being a peacock, did not enjoy the advantage of -having eyes in his tail. The Swedish Minister, M. Dué, his massive -frame quivering with laughter, was meanwhile engaged in performing a -like kindly office on to the back of his Roumanian colleague, Prince -Ghika, who in his turn was anointing the uniform of M. van der -Hooven, the Netherlands Minister. Providentially, the Delyanoff -family were all grouped together before the altar, and the farmyard -imitations of the Armenian choir so effectually drowned our unseemly -merriment that any faint echoes which reached the family were -ascribed by them to our very natural emotions in the circumstances. -I heard, indeed, afterwards that the family were much touched by our -attendance and by our sympathetic behaviour, but never, before or -since, have I attended so hilarious a funeral. - -Lord Dufferin, in common with most of the members of the Embassy, was -filled with an intense desire to kill a bear. These animals, of -course, hibernate, and certain peasants made a regular livelihood by -discovering bears' lairs (the Russian term, a corruption from the -German, is "bear-loge") and then coming to Petrograd and selling the -beast at so much per "pood" of forty Russian pounds. The finder -undertook to provide sledges and beaters for the sum {129} agreed -upon, but nothing was to be paid unless a shot at the bear was -obtained. These expeditions involved a considerable amount of -discomfort. There was invariably a long drive of from forty to -eighty miles to be made in rough country sledges from the nearest -available railway station; the accommodation in a peasant's house -would consist of the bare floor with some hay laid on it, and every -scrap of food, including bread, butter, tea, and sugar, would have to -be carried from Petrograd, as European stomachs could not assimilate -the sour, wet heavy black bread the peasants eat, and their -brick-tea, which contained bullocks' blood, was undrinkable to those -unaccustomed to it. It usually fell to my lot, as I spoke the -language, to go on ahead to the particular village to which we were -bound, and there to make the best arrangements possible for Lord and -Lady Dufferin's comfort. My instructions were always to endeavour to -get a room in the latest house built, as this was likely to be less -infested with vermin than the others. After a four or five hours' -run from Petrograd by train, one would find the vendor of the bear -waiting at the station with a country sledge. These sledges were -merely a few poles tied together, mounted on iron-shod wooden -runners, and filled with hay. The sledges were so long that it was -possible to lie at full length in them. The rifles, baggage, and -food being packed under the hay, one lay down at full length, clad in -long felt boots and heavy furs, an air-cushion under one's head, and -a Persian "bashilik," or hood of fine camel's hair, drawn over it to -{130} prevent ears or nose from being frostbitten. Tucked into a -thick fur rug, one composed oneself for an all-night drive through -the endless forests. The two drivers sat on a plank in front, and -one or other of them was continually dropping off to sleep, and -tumbling backwards on to the occupants of the sledge. It was not a -very comfortable experience, and sleep was very fickle to woo. In -the first place, the sledge-tracks through the forest were very rough -indeed, and the jolting was incessant; in the second place, should -the actual driver go to sleep as well as his relieving colleague, the -sledge would bump against the tree-trunks and overturn, and baggage, -rifles and occupants would find themselves struggling in the deep -snow. I always tied my baggage together with strings, so as to avoid -losing anything in these upsets, but even then it took a considerable -time retrieving the impedimenta from the deep snowdrifts. - -It always gave me pleasure watching the black conical points of the -fir trees outlined against the pale burnished steel of the sky, and -in the intense cold the stars blazed like diamonds out of the clear -grey vault above. The biting cold burnt like a hot iron against the -cheeks, until prudence, and a regard for the preservation of one's -ears, dictated the pulling of the "bashilik" over one's face again. -The intense stillness, and the absolute silence, for there are no -sleigh-bells in Northern Russia, except in the imagination of -novelists, had some subtle attraction for me. The silence was -occasionally--very {131} occasionally only--broken by an ominous, -long-drawn howl; then a spectral swift-trotting outline would appear, -keeping pace easily with the sledge, but half-hidden amongst the -tree-trunks. In that case the smooth-bore gun and the buckshot -cartridges were quickly disinterred from the hay, and the driver -urged his horses into a furious gallop. There was no need to use the -whip; the horses knew. Everyone would give a sigh of relief as the -silent grey swift-moving spectral figure, with its fox-like lope, -vanished after a shot or two had been fired at it. The drivers would -take off their caps and cross themselves, muttering "Thanks be to -God! Oh! those cursed wolves!" and the horses slowed down of their -own accord into an easy amble. There were compensations for a -sleepless night in the beauty of the pictures in strong black and -white, or in shadowy half-tones of grey which the endless forest -displayed at every turn. When the earth is wrapped in its -snow-mantle, it is never dark, and the gleams of light from the white -carpet down the long-drawn aisles of the dark firs were like the -pillared shadows of a great cathedral when the dusk is filling it -with mystery and a vague sense of immense size. - -All villages that I have seen in Northern Russia are alike, and when -you have seen one peasant's house you have seen all. - -The village consists of one long street, and in the winter the kindly -snow covers much of its unspeakable untidiness. The "isbas," or -wooden houses, are all of the same pattern; they are solidly built of -{132} rough logs, the projecting ends firmly morticed into each -other. Their gable ends all front the street, each with two windows, -and every "isba" has its courtyard, where the door is situated. -There are no gardens, or attempts at gardens, and the houses are one -and all roofed with grey shingles. Each house is raised some six -feet from the ground, and they are all water-tight, and most of them -air-tight as well. The houses are never painted, and their weathered -logs stand out silver-grey against the white background. A good deal -of imagination is shown in the fret-saw carving of the barg-boards, -which are either ornamented in conventional patterns, or have roughly -outlined grotesque animals clambering up their angles; very often too -there are fretsaw ornaments round the window-frames as well. -Prominent on the gate of every "isba" is the painting, in black on a -white ground, of the particular implement each occupant is bound to -supply in case of a fire, that dire and relentless foe to Russian -wooden-built villages. On some houses a ladder will be depicted; on -others an axe or a pail. The interior arrangement of every "isba" I -have ever seen is also identical. They always consist of two -fair-sized rooms; the "hot room," which the family inhabit in winter, -facing the street; the "cold room," used only in summertime, looking -into the courtyard. These houses are not uncomfortable, though, a -Russian peasant's wants being but few, they are not overburdened with -furniture. The disposition of the "hot room" is unvarying. -Supposing it facing {133} due south, the door will be in the -north-west corner. The north-east corner is occupied by an immense -brick stove, filling up one-eighth of the floor-space. These stoves -are about five feet high, and their tops are covered with loose -sheepskins. Here the entire family sleep in the stifling heat, their -resting-place being shared with thousands of voracious, crawling, -uninvited guests. In the south-east corner is the ikon shelf, where -the family ikons are ranged in line, with a red lamp burning before -them. There will be a table and benches in another corner, and a -rough dresser, with a samovar, and a collection of those wooden bowls -and receptacles, lacquered in scarlet, black, and gold, which Russian -peasants make so beautifully; and that is all. The temperature of -the "hot room" is overpowering, and the atmosphere fetid beyond the -power of description. Every male, on entering takes off his cap and -makes a bow before the ikons. I always conformed to this custom, for -there is no use in gratuitously wounding people's religious -susceptibilities. I invariably slept in the "cold room," for its -temperature being probably five or six degrees below freezing point, -it was free from vermin, and the atmosphere was purer. The master of -the house laid a few armfuls of hay on the floor, and his wife would -produce one of those towels Russian women embroider so skilfully in -red and blue, and lay it down for the cheek to rest against. I slept -in my clothes, with long felt boots on, and my furs thrown over me, -and I could sleep there as well as in any bed. - -{134} - -The Russian peasant's idea as to the relation of Holy Russia to the -rest of the world is curious. It is rather the point of view of the -Chinaman, who thinks that beyond the confines of the "Middle Kingdom" -there is only outer barbarism. Everything to the west of Russia is -known as "Germania," an intelligible mistake enough when it is -remembered that Germany marks Russia's Western frontier. "Slavs" -(akin, I think, to "Slova," "a word") are the only people who can -talk; "Germania" is inhabited by deaf and dumb people ("nyémski") who -can only make inarticulate noises. On one of my shooting -expeditions, I stopped for an hour at a tea-house to change horses -and to get warmed up. The proprietor told me that his son was very -much excited at hearing that there was a "deaf and dumb man" in the -house, as he had never seen one. Would I speak to the young man. -who was then putting on his Sunday clothes on the chance of the -interview being granted? - -In due course the son appeared; a handsome youth in glorified -peasant's costume. The first outward sign of a Russian peasant's -rise in the social scale is that he tucks his shirt _into_ his -trousers, instead of wearing it outside; the second stage is marked -by his wearing his trousers _over_ his boots, instead of thrusting -the trousers into the boots. This young fellow had not reached this -point of evolution, and wore his shirt outside, but it was a -dark-blue silk shirt, secured by a girdle of rainbow-coloured Persian -silk. He still wore his long boots outside too, {135} but they had -scarlet morocco tops, and the legs of them were elaborately -embroidered with gold wire. In modern parlance, this gay young spark -was a terrific village "nut." Never have I met a youth of such -insatiable curiosity, or one so crassly and densely ignorant. He was -one perpetual note of interrogation. "Were there roads and villages -in Germania?" To the best of my belief there were. "There were no -towns though as large as Petrograd." I rather fancied the contrary, -and instanced a flourishing little community of some five million -souls, situated on an island, with which I was very well acquainted. - -The youth eyed me with deep suspicion. "Were there railways in -Germania?" Only about a hundred times the mileage of the Russian -railways. "There was no electric light though, because Jablochkoff, -a Russian, had invented that." (I found this a fixed idea with all -Russian peasants.) I had a vague impression of having seen one or -two arc lights feebly glimmering in the streets of the benighted -cities of Germania. "Could people read and write there, and could -they really talk? It was easy to see that I had learned to talk -since I had been in Russia." I showed him a copy of the London -_Times_. "These were not real letters. Could anyone read these -meaningless signs," and so on _ad infinitum_. I am persuaded that -when I left that youth he was convinced that I was the nearest -relative to Ananias that he had ever met. - -No matter which hour of the twenty-four it might {136} happen to be, -ten minutes after my arrival in any of these remote villages the -entire population assembled to gaze at the "nyemetz," the deaf and -dumb man from remote "Germania," who had arrived in their midst. -They crowded into the "hot room," men, women, and children, and gaped -on the mysterious stranger from another world, who sat there drinking -tea, as we should gaze on a visitor from Mars. I always carried with -me on those occasions a small collapsible india-rubber bath and a -rubber folding basin. On my first expedition, after my arrival in -the village, I procured a bucket of hot water from the mistress of -the house, carried it to the "cold room," and, having removed all my -garments, proceeded to take a bath. Like wildfire the news spread -through the village that the "deaf and dumb" man was washing himself, -and they all flocked in to look. I succeeded in "shooing" away the -first arrivals, but they returned with reinforcements, until half the -population, men, women, and children, were standing in serried rows -in my room, following my every movement with breathless interest. I -have never suffered from agoraphobia, so I proceeded cheerfully with -my ablutions. "Look at him! He is soaping himself!" would be -murmured. "How dirty deaf and dumb people must be to want such a lot -of washing!" "Why does he rub his teeth with little brushes?" These -and similar observations fell from the eager crowd, only broken -occasionally by a piercing yell from a child, as she wailed -plaintively the Russian {137} equivalent of "Mummy! Sonia not like -ugly man!" It was distinctly an embarrassing situation, and only -once in my life have I been placed in a more awkward position. - -That was at Bahia, in Brazil, when I was at the Rio de Janeiro -Legation. I went to call on the British Consul's wife there, and had -to walk half a mile from the tram, through the gorgeous tropical -vegetation of the charming suburb of Vittoria, amongst villas faced -with cool-looking blue and white tiles; the pretty "azulejos" which -the Portuguese adopted from the Moors. Oddly enough, a tram and a -tramcar are always called "a Bond" in Brazil. The first tram-lines -were built out of bonds guaranteed by the State. The people took -this to mean the tram itself; so "Bond" it is, and "Bond" it will -remain. Being the height of a sweltering Brazilian summer, I was -clad in white from head to foot. Suddenly, as happens in the -tropics, without any warning whatever, the heavens opened, and solid -sheets of water fell on the earth. I reached the Consul's house with -my clean white linen soaked through, and most woefully bedraggled. -The West Indian butler (an old acquaintance) who opened the door -informed me that the ladies were out. After a glance at my -extraordinary disreputable garments, he added, "You gib me dem -clothes, sar, I hab dem all cleaned and ironed in ten minutes, before -de ladies come back." On the assurances of this swarthy servitor -that he and I were the only souls in the house, I divested myself of -every stitch {138} of clothing, and going into the drawing-room, sat -down to read a book in precisely the same attire as Adam adopted in -the earlier days of his married life. Time went by, and my clothes -did not reappear; I should have known that to a Jamaican coloured man -measures of time are very elastic. Suddenly I heard voices, and, to -my horror, I saw our Consul's wife approaching through the garden -with her two daughters and some other ladies. - -There was not a moment to lose! In that tropical drawing-room the -only available scrap of drapery was a red plush table-cover. -Bundling everything on the table ruthlessly to the ground, I had just -time to snatch up the table-cloth and drape myself in it (I trust -gracefully) when the ladies entered the room. I explained my -predicament and lamented my inability to rise, and so we had tea -together. It is the only occasion in the course of a long life in -which I ever remember taking tea with six ladies, clad only in a red -plush table-cloth with bead fringes. - -Returning to Russia, the peasants fingered everything I possessed -with the insatiable curiosity of children; socks, ties, and shirts. -I am bound to say that I never had the smallest thing stolen. As our -shooting expeditions were always during Lent, I felt great -compunction at shocking the peasants' religious scruples by eating -beef, ham, and butter, all forbidden things at that season. I tried -hard to persuade one woman that my cold sirloin of roast beef was -part of a rare English fish, specially {139} imported, but she was, I -fear, of a naturally sceptical bent of mind. - -Lady Dufferin had one curious gift. She could spend the night in a -rough country sledge, or sleep in her clothes on a truss of hay, and -yet appear in the morning as fresh and neat, and spick and span, as -though she had had the most elaborate toilet appliances at her -disposal. On these occasions she usually wore a Canadian -blanket-suit of dark blue and scarlet, with a scarlet belt and hood, -and a jaunty little sealskin cap. She always went out to the forest -with us. - -The procedure on these occasions was invariably the same. An army of -beaters was assembled, about two-thirds of them women. This made me -uneasy at first, until I learnt that the beaters run no danger -whatever from the bear. The beaters form five-sixths, or perhaps -less, of a circle round the bear's sleeping place, and the guns are -placed in the intervening open space. I may add that, personally, I -always used for bear an ordinary smooth-bore sporting gun, with a -leaden bullet. I passed every one of these bullets down the barrels -of my gun myself to avoid the risk of the gun bursting, before they -were loaded into cartridges, and I had them secured with melted -tallow. The advantages of a smooth-bore is that at close quarters, -as with bear, where you must kill your beast to avoid disagreeable -consequences, you lose no time in getting your sights on a -rapidly-moving object. You shoot as you would a rabbit; and you can -make {140} absolutely sure of your animal, _if you keep your head_. -A leaden bullet at close quarters has tremendous stopping power. Of -course you want a rifle as well for longer shots. I found this -method most successful with tiger, later in India, only you must -remain quite cool. - -At a given signal, the beaters begin yelling, beating iron pans with -sticks, blowing horns, shouting, and generally making enough -pandemonium to awaken the Seven Sleepers. It effectually awakes the -bear, who emerges from his bedroom in an exceedingly evil temper, to -see what all this fearful din is about. As he is surrounded with -noise on three sides, he naturally makes for the only quiet spot, -where the guns are posted. By this time he is in a distinctly -unamiable mood. - -I always took off my ski, and stood nearly waist-deep in the snow so -as to get a firm footing. Then you can make quite certain of your -shot. Ski or no ski, if it came to running away, the bear would -always have the pull on you. The first time I was very lucky. The -bear came straight to me. When he was within fifteen feet, and I -felt absolutely certain of getting him, I fired. He reared himself -on his hind legs to an unbelievable height, and fell stone dead at -Lady Dufferin's very feet. That bear's skin is within three feet of -me as I write these lines. We went back to the village in orthodox -fashion, all with fir-branches in our hands, as a sign of rejoicing; -I seated on the dead bear. - -As a small boy of nine I had been tossed in a {141} blanket at -school, up to the ceiling, caught again, then up a second time and -third time. It was not, and was not intended to be, a pleasant -experience, but in my day all little boys had to submit to it. The -unhappy little brats stuck their teeth together, and tried hard to -grin as they were being hurled skywards. These curious Russians, -though, appeared to consider it a delightful exercise. - -Arrived at the village again, I was captured by some thirty buxom, -stalwart women, and sent spinning up and up, again and again, till I -was absolutely giddy. Not only had one to thank them profusely for -this honour, but also to disburse a considerable amount of roubles in -acknowledgement of it. Poor Lady Dufferin was then caught, in spite -of her protests, and sent hurtling skywards through the air half a -dozen times. Needless to say that she alighted with not one hair of -her head out of place or one fold of her garments disarranged. Being -young and inexperienced then, I was foolish enough to follow the -Russian custom, and to present the village with a small cask of -vodka. I regretted it bitterly. Two hours later not a male in the -place was sober. Old grey-beards and young men lay dead drunk in the -snow; and quite little boys reeled about hopelessly intoxicated. I -could have kicked myself for being so thoughtless. During all the -years I was in Russia, I never saw a peasant woman drink spirits, or -under the influence of liquor. In my house at Petrograd I had a -young peasant as house-boy. He was quite a {142} nice lad of -sixteen; clean, willing, and capable, but, young as he was, he had -already fallen a victim to the national failing, in which he indulged -regularly once a month, when his wages were paid him, and nothing -could break him of this habit. I could always tell when Ephim, the -boy, had gone out with the deliberate intention of getting drunk, by -glancing into his bedroom. He always took the precaution of turning -the ikons over his bed, with their faces to the wall, before leaving, -and invariably blew out the little red lamp, in order that ikons -might not see him reeling into the room upon his return, or deposited -unconscious upon his bed. Being a singularly neat boy in his habits, -he always put on his very oldest clothes on these occasions, in order -not to damage his better ones, should he fall down in the street -after losing control of his limbs. This drunkenness spreads like a -cancer from top to bottom of Russian society. A friend of mine, who -afterwards occupied one of the highest administrative posts, told me -quite casually that, on the occasion of his youngest brother's -seventeenth birthday, the boy had been allowed to invite six young -friends of his own age to dinner; my friend thought it quite amusing -that every one of these lads had been carried to bed dead drunk. I -attribute the dry-rot which ate into the whole structure of the -mighty Empire, and brought it crashing to the ground, in a very large -degree to the intemperate habits prevailing amongst all classes of -Russian men, which in justice one must add, may be due to climatic -reasons. - -{143} - -In the villages our imported food was a constant source of -difficulty. We were all averse to shocking the peasants by eating -meat openly during Lent, but what were we to do? Out of deference to -their scruples, we refrained from buying eggs and milk, which could -have been procured in abundance, and furtively devoured ham, cold -beef, and pickles behind cunningly contrived ramparts of newspaper, -in the hope that it might pass unnoticed. Remembering how meagre at -the best of times the diet of these peasants is, it is impossible to -help admiring them for the conscientious manner in which they obey -the rules of their Church during Lent. I once gave a pretty peasant -child a piece of plum cake. Her mother snatched it from her, and -asked me whether the cake contained butter or eggs. On my -acknowledgement that it contained both, she threw it into the stove, -and asked me indignantly how I dared to imperil her child's immortal -soul by giving her forbidden food in Lent. Even my sixteen-year-old -house-boy in Petrograd, the bibulous Ephim, although he regularly -succumbed to the charms of vodka, lived entirely on porridge and dry -bread during Lent, and would not touch meat, butter, or eggs on any -consideration whatever. The more I saw of the peasants the more I -liked them. The men all drank, and were not particularly truthful, -but they were like great simple, bearded, unkempt children, with -(drunkenness apart) all a child's faults, and all a nice child's -power of attraction. I liked the {144} great, stalwart, big-framed -women too. They were seldom good-looking, but their broad faces -glowed with health and good nature, and they had as a rule very good -skins, nice teeth, and beautiful complexions. I found that I could -get on with these villagers like a house on fire. However cold the -weather, no village girl or woman wears anything on her head but a -gaudy folded cotton handkerchief. - -I never shared the resentment of my Russian friends at being -addressed with the familiar "thou" by the peasants. They intended no -discourtesy; it was their natural form of address, and they could not -be expected to know that beyond the narrow confines of their village -there was another world where the ceremonious "you" was habitually -employed. I rather fancy that anyone bred in the country, and -accustomed from his earliest childhood to mix with farmers, -cottagers, and farm-labourers, can get on with other country-bred -people, whether at home, or in Russia, India, or Canada--a town-bred -man would not know what to talk about. In spite of the peasants' -reputation for pilfering, not one of us ever had the smallest thing -stolen. I did indeed lose a rubber air-cushion in the snow, but that -was owing to the overturning of a sledge. A colleague of mine, whom -I had hitherto always regarded as a truthful man, assured me a year -afterwards that he had seen my air-cushion ranged on the ikon shelf -in a peasant's house, with two red lamps burning before it. The -owner of the house declared, according {145} to my friend, that my -air-cushion was an ikon of peculiar sanctity, though the painting had -in some mysterious manner become obliterated from it. My colleague -further assured me that my air-cushion was building up a very -gratifying little local connection as a miracle-working ikon of quite -unusual efficiency, and that, under its kindly tutelage, crops -prospered and flocks and herds increased; of course within reasonable -limits only, for the new ikon held essentially moderate views, and -was temperamentally opposed to anything in the way of undue optimism. -I wished that I could have credited this, for it would have been -satisfactory to imagine oneself, through the agency of the -air-cushion, a vicarious yet untiring benefactor of a whole -countryside. - -On one of our shooting expeditions a curious incident occurred. Lord -Dufferin had taken a long shot at a bear, and had wounded without -killing him. For some reason, the animal stopped, and climbed to the -top of a high fir tree. Lord Dufferin approached, fired again, and -the bear dropped dead to the ground. It is but seldom that one sees -a dead bear fall from the top of a tree. I witnessed an equally -strange sporting incident once in India. It was just over the -borders of Assam, and we were returning to camp on elephants, after a -day's big game shooting. As we approached a hollow clothed with -thick jungle, the elephants all commenced trumpeting. Knowing how -wonderfully keen the elephant's sense of smell is, that told us that -some beast lay concealed in the hollow. Thinking it {146} would -prove to be a bear, I took up my favourite smooth-bore charged with -leaden bullets, when with a great crashing and rending of boughs the -jungle parted, and a galloping rhinoceros charged out, his head well -down, making straight for the elephant that was carrying a nephew of -mine. My nephew had just time to snatch up a heavy 4-bore elephant -rifle. He fired, and by an extraordinary piece of luck succeeded in -hitting the huge beast in his one vulnerable spot, just behind the -shoulder. The rhinoceros rolled right over like a shot rabbit and -lay stone dead. It was a thousand to one chance, and if I live to a -hundred I shall never see anything of the sort again. It was also -very fortunate, for had he missed his shot, nothing on earth could -have saved my nephew's life. - -We found that the most acceptable presents in the villages were -packets of sugar and tins of sardines. Sugar is costly and difficult -to procure in Russian villages. The usual way of employing it, when -friends are gathered round the table of some "isba" with the samovar -in the middle and steaming glasses of tea before each guest, is for -No. 1 to take a piece of sugar, place it between his teeth, and then -suck his tea through it. No. 1 quickly passes the piece of sugar to -his neighbor, who uses it in the same way, and transfers it to the -next person, and so on, till the sugar is all dissolved. This method -of using sugar, though doubtless economical, always struck me as -being of dubious cleanliness. A gift of a pound of lump sugar was -always welcomed with {147} grateful thanks. Sardines were even more -acceptable, as they could be eaten in Lent. The grown-ups devoured -the fish, lifting them out of the tin with their fingers; and the -children were given the oil to smear on their bread, in place of -forbidden butter. - -After days in the keen fresh air, and in the limitless expanse of -forest and snow, life in Petrograd seemed terribly artificial. I -used to marvel that my cultured, omniscient, polygot friends were -fellow-countrymen of the bearded, red-shirted, illiterate peasants we -had just left. The gulf seemed so unbridgable between them, and -apart from a common language and a common religion (both, I -acknowledge, very potent bonds of union) there seemed no link between -them, or any possible community of ideas. Now in England there is -that community of ideas. All classes, from the highest to the -lowest, share to some extent the same tastes and the same prejudices. -There is too that most powerful of connecting links, a common love of -sport. The cricket ground and the football field are witnesses to -this, and it shows in a hundred little ways beside. The freemasonry -of sport is very real. - -It was perfectly delightful to live with and to mix so much amongst -charming people of such wide culture and education, but they seemed -to me to bear the same relation to the world outside their own that a -rare orchid in its glass shelter bears to a wild flower growing in -the open air. The one is {148} indigenous to the soil; the other was -originally imported, and can only thrive in an artificial atmosphere, -and under artificial conditions. If the glass gets broken, or the -fire goes out, the orchid dies, but the wild flower is not affected. -After all, man made the towns, but God made the country. - - - - -{149} - -CHAPTER V - -The Russian Gipsies--Midnight drives--Gipsy singing--Its -fascination--The consequences of a late night--An unconventional -luncheon--Lord Dufferin's methods--Assassination of Alexander -II--Stürmer--Pathetic incidents in connection with the murder of the -Emperor--The funeral procession and service--Details concerning--The -Votive Church--The Order of the Garter--Unusual incidents at the -Investiture--Precautions taken for Emperor's safety--The Imperial -train--Finland--Exciting salmon-fishing there--Harraka -Niska--Koltesha--Excellent shooting there--Ski-running--"Ringing the -game in"--A wolf-shooting party--The obese General--Some incidents--A -novel form of sport--Black game and capercailzie--At dawn in a -Finnish forest--Immense charm of it--Ice-hilling or "Montagnes -Russes"--Ice-boating on the Gulf of Finland. - - -In my day there were two or three restaurants on the islands formed -by the delta of the Neva, with troupes of singing gipsies attached to -them. These restaurants did a roaring trade in consequence, for the -singing of the gipsy choirs seems to produce on Russians the same -maddening, almost intoxicating effect that the "skirl o' the pipes" -does on those with Scottish blood in their veins. - -Personally, I thought that one soon tired of this {150} gipsy -singing; not so my Russian friends--it appeared to have an -irresistible attraction for them. I always dreaded the consequences -when some foolish person, usually at 1 or even 2 a.m., proposed a -visit to the gipsies, for all the ladies present would instantly jump -at the suggestion, and I knew full well that it entailed a forcible -separation from bed until six or possibly seven next morning. - -Troikas would at once be sent for. A troika is a thing quite apart. -Its horses are harnessed as are no other horses in the world, since -the centre horse trots in shafts, whilst the two outside horses, the -"_pristashkui_" loose save for long traces, gallop. Driving a troika -is a special art. The driver stands; he has a special badge, -peacock's feathers set in a round cap; he has a special name, -"_yamshchik_," and he charges quite a special price. - -To my mind, the drive out to the islands was the one redeeming -feature of these expeditions. Within the confines of the city, the -pace of the troikas was moderate enough, but as the last scattered -houses of the suburbs merged into the forest, the driver would call -to his horses, and the two loose horses broke into a furious gallop, -the centre horse in shafts moving as swiftly as any American trotter. -Smoothly and silently under the burnished steel of the starlit sky, -they tore over the snow, the vague outlines of the fir trees whizzing -past. Faster and faster, until the wild excitement of it made one's -blood tingle within one, even as the bitter cold made one's cheeks -tingle, as we raced through the {151} keen pure air. That wild -gallop through the forest was perfectly glorious. I believe that on -us sons of the North real cold has the same exhilarating effect that -warmth and sunshine have on the Lotos-eating dwellers by the blue -Mediterranean. - -The troika would draw up at the door of a long, low, wooden building, -hidden away amongst the fir trees of the forest. After repeated -bangings at the door, a sleepy-eyed Tartar appeared, who ushered one -into a great gaunt, bare, whitewashed room, where other little -yellow, flat-faced, Tartar waiters were lighting countless wax -candles, bringing in many slim-shouldered, gold foil-covered bottles -of champagne, and a samovar or two, and arranging seats. Then the -gipsy troupe strolled in, some twenty-five strong; the younger -members passably good-looking, with fine dark eyes, abundant -eyelashes, and extremely indifferent complexions. The older members -of the company made no attempt at coquetry. They came muffled in -woollen shawls, probably to conceal toilet deficiencies, yawning -openly and undisguisedly; not concealing their disgust at being -robbed of their sleep in order to sing to a pack of uninteresting -strangers, to whom, incidentally, they owed their entire means of -livelihood. Some ten swarthy, evil-faced, indeterminate males with -guitars filled up the background. - -One of the younger members of the troupe would begin a song in waltz -time, in a curious metallic voice, with a ring in it of something -Eastern, {152} barbaric, and utterly strange to European ears, to the -thrum of the guitars of the swarthy males in the background. The -elderly females looked inexpressibly bored, and hugged their woollen -shawls a little closer over their heads. Then the chorus took up the -refrain. A tempest of wild, nasal melody arose, in the most perfect -harmony. It was metallic, and the din was incredible, but the effect -it produced on the listeners was astounding. The old women, dropping -their cherished shawls, awoke to life. Their dull eyes sparkled -again, they sang madly, frenetically; like people possessed. The -un-European _timbre_ of the voices conduced doubtless to the effect, -but the fact remains that this clamour of nasal, metallic voices, -singing in exquisite harmony, had about it something so novel and -fresh--or was it something so immemorially old?--that the listeners -felt absolutely intoxicated. - -On the Russians it acted like hypnotism. After the first song, they -all joined in, and even I, the dour and unemotional son of a Northern -land, found myself, as words and music grew familiar, shouting the -bass parts of the songs with all the strength of my lungs. The -Russian language lends itself admirably to song, and the excess of -sibilants in it is not noticeable in singing. - -These Russian gipsies, like the Austrian bands, produced their -effects by very simple means. They harmonised their songs -themselves, and they always introduced a succession of "sixths" or -"thirds"; emphasising the "sixth" in the tenor part. - -{153} - -One can, however, have too much of a good thing. I used to think -longingly of my far-off couch, but there was no tearing Russians away -from the gipsies. The clock ticked on; they refused to move. The -absorption of much champagne has never afforded me the smallest -amusement. The consumption of tea has also its limits, and my -longed-for bed was so far away! The really staggering figure one had -to disburse as one's share for these gipsy entertainments seemed to -me to be a very long price to pay for a sleepless night. - -Once a fortnight the "Queen's Messenger" left Petrograd at noon, on -his return journey to London. On "Messenger mornings" we had all to -be at the Embassy at 9 a.m. punctually. One morning, after a -compulsory vigil with the gipsies, I was awakened by my servant with -the news that it was close on nine, and that my sledge was already at -the door. It was impossible to dress in the time, so after some -rapid ablutions, I drew the long felt boots the Russians call -"Valinki" over my pyjamas, put on some heavy furs, and jumped into my -sledge. Lord Dufferin found me writing hard in the steam-heated -Chancery, clad only in silk pyjamas, and with my bare feet in -slippers. He made no remark, but I knew that nothing ever escaped -his notice. By noon we had the despatches finished, the bags sealed -up, the "waybill" made out, various precautionary measures taken as -to which it is unnecessary to enlarge, and the Messenger left for -London. I called to the {154} hall porter to bring me my furs, and -told him to order my sledge round. "His Excellency has sent your -sledge home," said the porter, with a smile lurking round the corners -of his mouth. "Then call me a hack sledge." "His Excellency hopes -that you will give him the pleasure of your company at luncheon." -"But I must go home and dress first." "His Excellency's orders were -that you are to go as you are," answered the grinning porter. Then I -understood. Nothing is ever gained by being shy or self-conscious, -so after a hasty toilet, I sent for my heavy fur "shuba." Furs in -Russia are intended for use, not ornament, and this "shuba" was an -extremely weighty and voluminous garment, designed to withstand the -rigours of the North Pole itself. A glance at the mirror convinced -me that I was most indelicately _décolleté_ about the neck, so I -hooked the big collar of the "shuba" together, and strode upstairs. -The heat of this fur garment was unendurable, but there was nothing -else for it. Certainly the legs of my pyjamas protruded below it, so -I congratulated myself on the fact that they were a brand-new pair of -very smart striped mauve silk. My bare feet too were encased in -remarkably neat Persian slippers of green morocco. Lady Dufferin -received me exactly as though I had been dressed in the most -immaculate of frock-coats. Her children though, gazed at my huge fur -coat, round-eyed with astonishment, for neither man nor woman ever -comes into a Russian house with furs on--an {155} arrangement which -would not at all suit some of my London friends, who seem to think -that furs are designed for being shown off in hot rooms. The -governess, an elderly lady, catching sight of my unfortunate pyjama -legs below the fur coat, assumed a highly scandalised attitude, as -though she could scarcely credit the evidence of her eyes. (I repeat -that they were exceptionally smart pyjamas.) - -During luncheon Lord Dufferin made himself perfectly charming, and I -did my best to act as though it were quite normal to sit down to -one's repasts in an immense fur coat. - -The Ambassador was very susceptible to cold, and liked the house -heated to a great temperature. That day the furnace-man must have -been quite unusually active, for the steam hissed and sizzled in the -radiators, until the heat of that dining-room was suffocating. -Conscious of my extreme _décolletage_, I did not dare unhook the -collar of my "shuba," being naturally of a modest disposition, and -never, even in later years at Colombo or Singapore, have I suffered -so terribly from heat as in that Petrograd dining-room in the depths -of a Russian winter. The only cool thing in the room was the -governess, who, when she caught sight of my bare feet, froze into an -arctic iceberg of disdain, in spite of my really very ornamental -Persian slippers. The poor lady had obviously never even caught a -glimpse of pajamas before. After that episode I always came to the -Embassy fully dressed. - -{156} - -Another instance of Lord Dufferin's methods occurs to me. We had a -large evening party at the Embassy, and a certain very pushing and -pertinacious English newspaper correspondent did everything in his -power to get asked to this reception. For very excellent reasons, -his request was refused. In spite of this, on the night of the party -the journalist appeared. I informed Lord Dufferin, and asked what he -wished me to do about it. "Let me deal with him myself," answered -the Ambassador, and going up to the unbidden guest, he made him a -little bow, and said with a bland smile, "May I inquire, sir, to what -I owe this most unexpected honour?" Then as the unhappy -newspaper-man stuttered out something, Lord Dufferin continued with -an even blander smile, "Do not allow me, my dear sir, I beg of you, -to detain you from your other doubtless numerous engagements"; then -calling me, he added, "Will you kindly accompany this gentleman to -the front door, and see that on a cold night like this he gets all -his warm clothing." It was really impossible to turn a man out of -your house in a more courteous fashion. - -There was another plan Lord Dufferin used at times. All despatches, -and most of our private letters, were sent home by hand, in charge of -the Queen's Messenger. We knew perfectly well that anything sent -from the Embassy through the ordinary mails would be opened at the -Censor's office, and copies taken. Ministries of Foreign Affairs -{157} give at times "diplomatic" answers, and occasionally it was -advisable to let the Russian Government know that the Ambassador was -quite aware that the assurances given him did not quite tally with -the actual facts. He would then write a despatch to London to that -effect, and send it by mail, being well aware that it would be opened -and a copy sent to the Russian Ministry of Foreign Affairs. In this -indirect fashion, he delicately conveyed to the Russian Government -that he had not been hoodwinked by the rather fanciful statements -made to him. - -I was sitting at luncheon with some friends at a colleague's house on -Sunday, the fateful 1st of March, 1881 (March 13, new style). -Suddenly our white-headed old Chancery messenger burst -unceremoniously into the room, and called out, "The Emperor has been -assassinated!" We all jumped up; the old man, a German-speaking -Russian from the Baltic Provinces, kept on wringing his hands, and -moaning, "Unser arme gute Kaiser! unser arme gute Kaiser!" ("Our poor -dear Emperor!") We hurried to the Embassy as fast as we could go, and -found the Ambassador just stepping into his carriage to get the -latest news from the Winter Palace. Lady Dufferin had not seen the -actual crime committed, but she had heard the explosion of the bomb, -and had seen the wounded horses led past, and was terribly upset in -consequence. She was walking along the Catherine Canal with her -youngest daughter when the Emperor's carriage {158} passed and the -first bomb was thrown. The carriage was one of Napoleon III's -special armoured coaches, bought after the fall of the Second French -Empire. The bomb shattered the wheels of the carriage, but the -Emperor was untouched. He stepped out into the snow, when the second -bomb was thrown, which blew his legs to pieces, and the Emperor was -taken in a private sledge, in a dying condition, to the Winter -Palace. The bombs had been painted white, to look like snowballs. - -Ten minutes later one of the Court Chamberlains arrived. I met him -in the hall, and he informed me, with the tears streaming down his -face, that all was over. - -That Chamberlain was a German-Russian named Stürmer, and he was the -very same man who thirty-four years later was destined, by his gross -incompetence, or worse, as Prime Minister, to bring the mighty -Russian Empire crashing in ruins to the ground, and to drive the -well-intentioned, irresolute Nicholas II, the grandson of the -Sovereign for whom he professed so great an affection, to his -abdication, imprisonment, and ignominious death. - -There was a Queen's Messenger due in Petrograd from London that same -afternoon, and Lord Dufferin, thinking that the police might give -trouble, desired me to meet him at the station. - -The Messenger refused to believe my news. He persisted in treating -the whole thing as a joke, so I ordered my coachman to drive through -the great {159} semi-circular place in front of the Winter Palace. -That place presented a wonderful sight. There were tens of thousands -of people, all kneeling bare-headed in the snow, in close-packed -ranks. I thought the sight of those serried thousands kneeling -bare-headed, praying for the soul of their dead Emperor, a strangely -moving and beautiful spectacle. When the Messenger saw this, and -noted the black and yellow Imperial flag waving at half-mast over the -Palace, he no longer doubted. - -The Grand Duke Vladimir had announced the Emperor's death to the vast -crowds in the traditional Russian fashion. The words "death" or -"die" being considered ill-omened by old-fashioned Russians, the -actual sentence used by the Grand Duke was, "The Emperor has bidden -you to live long." ("Gosudar Imperator vam prikazal dolga jit!") -The words conveyed their message. - -The body of the Emperor having been embalmed, the funeral did not -take place for a fortnight. As the crow flies, the distance between -the Winter Palace and the Fortress Church is only about half a mile; -it was, however, still winter-time, the Neva was frozen over, and the -floating bridges had been removed. It being contrary to tradition to -take the body of a dead Emperor of Russia across ice, the funeral -procession had to pass over the permanent bridges to the Fortress, a -distance of about six miles. - -Lady Dufferin and I saw the procession from the corner windows of a -house on the quays. On {160} paper it sounded very grand, but like -so many things in Russia, it was spoilt by lack of attention to -details. The distances were kept irregularly, and many of the -officials wore ordinary civilian great-coats over their uniforms, -which did not enhance the effect of the _cortège_. The most striking -feature of the procession was the "Black Knight" on foot, followed -immediately by the "Golden Knight" on horseback. These were, I -believe, meant to typify "The Angel of Death" and "The Angel of the -Resurrection." Both Knights were clad in armour from head to foot, -with the vizors of their helmets down. The "Black Knight's" armour -was dull sooty-black all over; he had a long black plume waving from -his helmet. The "Golden Knight," mounted on a white horse, with a -white plume in his helmet, wore gilded and burnished armour, which -blazed like a torch in the sunlight. The weight of the black armour -being very great, there had been considerable difficulty in finding a -man sufficiently strong to walk six miles, carrying this tremendous -burden. A gigantic young private of the Preobrajensky Guards -undertook the task for a fee of one hundred roubles, but though he -managed to accomplish the distance, he fainted from exhaustion on -reaching the Fortress Church, and was, I heard, two months in -hospital from the effects of his effort. - -We were able to get Lady Dufferin into her place in the Fortress -Church, long before the procession arrived, by driving across the ice -of the {161} river. The absence of seats in a Russian church, and -the extreme length of the Orthodox liturgy, rendered these services -very trying for ladies. The Fortress Church had been built by a -Dutch architect, and was the most un-Eastern-looking Orthodox church -I ever saw. It actually contained a pulpit! In the north aisle of -the church all the Emperors since Peter the Great's time lie in -uniform plain white marble tombs, with gilt-bronze Russian eagles at -their four corners. The Tsars mostly rest in the Cathedral of the -Archangel, in the Moscow Kremlin. I have before explained that Peter -was the last of the Tsars and the first of the Emperors. The -regulations for Court mourning in Petrograd were most stringent. All -ladies had to appear in perfectly plain black, lustreless woollen -dresses, made high to the throat. On their heads they wore a sort of -Mary Queen of Scots pointed cap of black crape, with a long black -crape veil falling to their feet. The only detail of the funeral -which struck me was the perfectly splendid pall of cloth of gold. -This pall had been specially woven in Moscow, of threads of real -gold. When folded back during the ceremony it looked exactly like -gleaming waves of liquid gold. - -A memorial church in old-Russian style has been erected on the -Catherine Canal on the spot where Alexander II was assassinated. The -five onion-shaped domes of this church, of copper enamelled in -stripes and spirals of crude blue and white, green and yellow, and -scarlet and white, may possibly {162} look less garish in two hundred -years' time than they do at present. The severely plain Byzantine -interior, covered with archaic-looking frescoes on a gold ground, is -effective. The ikonostas is entirely of that vivid pink and -enormously costly Siberian marble that Russians term "heavy stone." -Personally I should consider the huge sum it cost as spent in vain. - -Edward VII and Queen Alexandra, in those days, of course, Prince and -Princess of Wales, represented Great Britain at Alexander II's -funeral, and remained in Petrograd a month after it. - -A week after the funeral, the Prince of Wales, by Queen Victoria's -command, invested Alexander III with the Order of the Garter. As the -Garter is the oldest Order of Chivalry in Europe, the ceremonies at -its investiture have 570 years of tradition behind them. The -insignia, the star, the ribbon, the collar, the sword, and the actual -garter itself, are all carried on separate, long, narrow cushions of -red velvet, heavily trimmed with gold bullion. Owing to the deep -Court mourning, it was decided that the investiture should be -private. No one was to be present except the new Emperor and -Empress, Queen Alexandra, the Grand Master and Grand Mistress of the -Russian Court, the members of the British Embassy, and the Prince of -Wales and his staff. This, as it turned out, was very fortunate. -The ceremony was to take place at the Anitchkoff Palace on the -Nevsky, which Alexander III inhabited throughout his reign, as {163} -he preferred it to the huge rambling Winter Palace. On the appointed -day, we all marched into the great Throne room of the Anitchkoff -Palace, the Prince of Wales leading the way, with five members of his -staff carrying the insignia on the traditional long narrow velvet -cushions. I carried nothing, but we made, I thought, a very -dignified and effective entrance. As we entered the Throne room, a -perfectly audible feminine voice cried out in English, "Oh, my dear! -Do look at them. They look exactly like a row of wet-nurses carrying -babies!" Nothing will induce me to say from whom the remark -proceeded. The two sisters, Empress and Queen, looked at each other -for a minute, and then exploded with laughter. The Emperor fought -manfully for a while to keep his face, until, catching sight of the -member of the Prince of Wales's staff who was carrying his cushion in -the peculiarly maternal fashion that had so excited the risibility of -the Royal sisters, he too succumbed, and his colossal frame quivered -with mirth. Never, I imagine, since its institution in 1349, has the -Order of the Garter been conferred amid such general hilarity, but as -no spectators were present, this lapse from the ordinary decorum of -the ceremonial did not much matter. The general public never heard -of it, nor, I trust, did Queen Victoria. - -The Emperor Alexander III was a man of great personal courage, but he -gave way, under protest, to the wishes of those responsible for his -personal safety. They insisted on his always using {164} the -armour-plated carriages bought from Napoleon III. These coaches were -so immensely heavy that they soon killed the horses dragging them. -Again, on railway journeys, the actual time-table and route of the -Imperial train between two points was always different from the -published time-table and route. Napoleon III's private train had -been purchased at the same time as his steel-plated carriages. This -train had been greatly enlarged and fitted to the Russian gauge. I -do not suppose that any more sumptuous palace on wheels has ever been -built than this train of nine vestibuled cars. It was fitted with -every imaginable convenience. Alexander III sent it to the frontier -to meet his brother-in-law the Prince of Wales, which was the -occasion on which I saw it. - -During the six months following Alexander II's assassination all -social life in Petrograd stopped. We of the Embassy had many other -resources, for in those days the British business colony in Petrograd -was still large, and flourished exceedingly. They had various -sporting clubs, of some of which we were members. There was in -particular the Fishing Club at Harraka Niska in Finland, where the -river Vuoksi issues from the hundred-mile-long Lake Saima. - -It was a curious experience driving to the Finnish railway station in -Petrograd. In the city outside, the date would be June 1, Russian -style. Inside the station, the date became June 13, European style. -In place of the baggy knickerbockers, {165} high boots, and fur caps -of the Russian railwaymen, the employees of the Finnish railway wore -the ordinary uniforms customary on European railways. The tickets -were printed in European, not Russian characters, and the fares were -given in marks and pennies, instead of in roubles and kopecks. The -notices on the railway were all printed in six languages, Finnish, -Swedish, Russian, French, English, and German, and my patriotic -feelings were gratified at noting that all the locomotives had been -built in Glasgow. I was astonished to find that although Finland -formed an integral part of the Russian Empire, there was a Custom -House and Customs examination at the Finnish frontier. - -Finland is a country of endless little hills, and endless forests, -all alike bestrewn with huge granite boulders; it is also a land of -endless rivers and lakes. It is pretty in a monotonous fashion, and -looks wonderfully tidy after Russia proper. The wooden houses and -villages are all neatly painted a chocolate brown, and in spite of -its sparse population it seems very prosperous. The Finns are all -Protestants; the educated classes are mostly Swedish-speaking, the -others talking their own impossible Ural-Altaic language. At the -extremely comfortable club-house at Harraka Niska none of the -fishermen or boatmen could talk anything but Finnish. We all had -little conversation books printed in Russian and Finnish, but we -usually found the language of signs more {166} convenient. In later -years, in South America, it became my duty to interview daily the -Legation cook, an accomplished but extremely adipose female from Old -Spain. I had not then learnt Spanish, and she understood no other -tongue, so we conversed by signs. It is extremely derogatory to -one's personal dignity to be forced to imitate in succession a hen -laying an egg, a sheep bleating, or a duck quacking, and yet this was -the only way in which I could order dinner. No one who has not tried -it can believe how difficult it is to indicate in pantomime certain -comestibles, such, for instance, as kidneys, liver and bacon, or a -Welsh rarebit. - -The fish at Harraka would not look at a fly, and could only be hooked -on a phantom-minnow. The fishing there was very exciting. The big -fish all lay where Lake Saima debouched into the turbulent Vuoksi -river. There was a terrific rapid there, and the boatmen, who knew -every inch of the ground, would head the boat straight for that -seething white caldron of raging waves, lashing and roaring down the -rocky gorge, as they dashed up angry spurts of white spray. Just as -it seemed that nothing could save one from being hurled into that mad -turmoil of leaping waters, where no human being could hope to live -for a minute, a back-current shot the boat swiftly across to the -other bank. That was the moment when the fish were hooked. They -were splendid fighters, and played magnificently. These Harraka fish -were curiously {167} uniform in size, always running from 18 to 22 -lb. Though everyone called them salmon, I think myself that they -were really bull-trout, or _Salmo ferox_. A salmon would have had to -travel at least 400 miles from salt water, and I do not believe that -any fish living could have got up the tremendous Imatra waterfall, -some six miles lower down the Vuoksi. These fish invariably had lice -on them. In Great Britain sea-lice on a salmon are taken as a -certain indication that the fish is fresh-run. These fish cannot -possibly have been fresh-run, so I think it probable that in these -great lakes there may be a fresh-water variety of the parasite. -Another peculiarity of the Harraka fish was that, though they were -excellent eating, they would not keep above two days. I have myself -caught eleven of these big fellows in one day. During June there was -capital grayling fishing in the lower Vuoksi, the fish running large, -and taking the fly readily, though in that heavy water they were apt -to break off. There were plenty of small trout too in the Vuoksi, -but the densely-wooded banks made fishing difficult, and the water -was always crystal-clear, and needed the finest of tackle. - -I spent some most enjoyable days at Koltesha, a small English -shooting-club of ten members, about twenty miles out of Petrograd. -During September, for one fortnight, the marshes round Koltesha were -alive with "double-snipe." This bird migrates in thousands from the -Arctic regions to {168} the far South, at the approach of autumn. -They alighted in the Koltesha marshes to recruit themselves after -their journey from the North Pole, and owing to circumstances beyond -their control, few of them continued their journey southward. This -confiding fowl has never learnt to zig-zag like the other members of -the snipe family, and they paid the penalty for this omission by -usually proceeding to the kitchen. A "double-snipe" is most -delicious eating. The winter shooting at Koltesha was most -delightful. The art of "ski-walking" had first to be learnt, and on -commencing this unaccustomed method of locomotion, various muscles, -which its use called into play for the first time, showed their -resentment by aching furiously. The ground round Koltesha being -hilly was admirably adapted for coasting on ski. It was difficult at -first to shoot from the insecure footing of ski, and the unusual -amount of clothing between one's shoulder and the stock of one's gun -did not facilitate matters. Everything, however, can be learnt in -time. I can claim to be the pioneer of ski on the American -Continent, for in January, 1887, I brought over to Canada the very -first pair of ski ever seen in America. I used to coast down the -toboggan slides at Ottawa on them, amidst universal derision. I was -told that, however useful ski might be in Russia, they were quite -unsuited to Canadian conditions, and would never be popular there, as -the old-fashioned "raquettes" were infinitely superior. Humph! _Qui -vivra verra!_ - -{169} - -Koltesha abounded in black game, "ryabchiks," or hazel-grouse, and -ptarmigan. Russian hares turn snow-white in winter, and are very -difficult to see against a snowy background in consequence. It is -almost impossible to convey on paper any idea of the intense delight -of those days in the sun and the cold, when the air had that -delicious clean smell that always goes with intense frost, the dark -fir woods, with their purple shadows, stood out in sharp contrast to -the dazzling sheet of white snow, and the sunlight gilded the patches -of oak and birch scrub that climbed down the hollows of the low -hills. One returned home glowing from head to foot. We got larger -game too by "ringing them." The process of "ringing" is as follows. -No four-footed creature can travel over the snow without leaving his -tracks behind him. Let us suppose a small wood, one mile in -circumference. If a man travels round this on ski, and if the track -of any animal crosses his trail, going _into_ the wood, and this -track does not again come _out_ of the wood, it is obvious that that -particular animal is still taking cover there. Measures to drive him -out are taken accordingly. We got in this way at Koltesha quite a -number of elks, lynxes, and wolves. - -The best wolf-shooting I ever got was at the invitation of the -Russian Minister of Finance. Great packs of these ravenous brutes -were playing havoc on his estate, two hundred miles from Petrograd, -so he invited a large shooting party to his {170} country house. We -travelled down in a private sleeping-car, and had over twenty miles -to drive in rough country sledges from the station. One of the -guests was an enormously fat Russian General, a perfect mammoth of a -man. As I was very slim in those days, I was told off as this -gigantic warrior's fellow-passenger. Although he took up nine-tenths -of the sledge, I just managed to creep in, but every time we -jolted--and as the track was very rough, this was pretty -frequently--I got 250 lb. of Russian General on the top of me, -squeezing the life out of me. He was a good-natured Colossus, and -apologised profusely for his own obesity, and for his instability, -but I was black and blue all over, and since that day I have felt -profound sympathy for the little princes in the Tower, for I know -what being smothered with a feather-bed feels like. - -The Minister's country house was, as are most other Russian country -houses, a modest wooden building with whitewashed rooms very scantily -furnished. The Minister had, however, thoughtfully brought down his -famous Petrograd chef, and I should judge about three-quarters of the -contents of his wine-cellar. We had to proceed to our places in the -forest in absolute silence, and the wolf being an exceedingly wary -animal with a a very keen sense of smell, all smoking was rigorously -prohibited. - -It was nice open scrubland, undulating gently. The beaters were -skilful and we were very lucky, {171} for after an interminable wait, -the entire pack of wolves rushed down on us. A wolf is killed with -slugs from a smooth-bore. I personally was fortunate, for I got -shots at eight wolves, and six of them felt disinclined for further -exertions. I still have a carriage-rug made of the skins of the -wolves I killed that day. The banging all round meanwhile was -terrific. In two days we accounted for fifty-two of these pests. It -gave me the utmost pleasure killing these murderous, bloodthirsty -brutes; far more than slaying an inoffensive bear. Should a bear -encounter a human being in the course of his daily walks, he is -certainly apt to hug him to death, as a precautionary measure. He is -also addicted to smashing to a jelly, with one blow of his powerful -paws, the head of a chance stranger. These peculiarities apart, the -bear may be regarded as practically harmless. It is otherwise with -the wolf. - -Some of the British Colony were fond of going to Finland for a -peculiar form of sport. I use the last word dubiously, for to kill -any game birds during the breeding season seems a curiously -unsportsmanlike act. Circumstances rather excused this. It is well -known that black game do not pair, but that they are polygamous. -During the breeding season the male birds meet every morning at dawn -on regular fighting grounds, and there battle for the attentions of -the fairer sex. These fighting grounds are well known to the -keepers, who erect there in early autumn conical shelters of fir -{172} branches. The birds become familiar with these shelters -(called in Russian "shagashki") and pay no attention to them. The -"gun" introduces himself into the shelter not later than midnight, -and there waits patiently for the first gleam of dawn. He must on no -account smoke. With the first grey streak of dawn in the sky there -is a great rushing of wings in the air, and dozens of male birds -appear from nowhere; strutting up and down, puffing out their -feathers, and hissing furiously at each other in challenge. The grey -hens meanwhile sit in the surrounding trees, watching, as did the -ladies of old at a tournament, the prowess of their men-folk in the -lists. The grey hens never show themselves, and make no sound; two -things, one would imagine, contrary to every instinct of their sex. -A challenge once accepted, two males begin fighting furiously with -wings, claws, and beaks. So absorbed are the birds in their combat, -that they neither see nor hear anything, and pay no attention to a -gun-shot. Should they be within reach of the "shagashka," that is -the time to fire. It sounds horribly unsportsmanlike, but it must be -remembered that the birds are only just visible in the uncertain -dawn. As dawn matures into daylight, the birds suddenly stop -fighting, and all fly away simultaneously, followed by the grey hens. -I never would kill more than two as specimens, for this splendid bird -is such a thing of joy in his breeding plumage, with his glossy dark -blue satin coat, and white velvet waistcoat, that there {173} is some -excuse for wanting to examine him closer. Ladies, too, loved a -blackcock's tail or wings for their hats. It was also the only way -in which this curious and little-known phase of bird life could be -witnessed. - -The capercailzie is called in Russian "the deaf one." Why this name -should be given to a bird of abnormally acute hearing seems at first -sight puzzling. The explanation is that the male capercailzie in the -breeding season concludes his love-song with a peculiar "tchuck, -tchuck," impossible to reproduce on paper, moving his head rapidly to -and fro the while. During this "tchuck, tchuck," the bird is deaf -and blind to the world. The capercailzie hunter goes out into the -forest at about 1 a.m. and listens intently. As soon as he hears a -capercailzie's song, he moves towards the sound very, very -cautiously. When within half a mile of the bird, he must wait for -the "tchuck, tchuck," which lasts about two minutes, before daring to -advance. The "tchuck" over, he must remain absolutely motionless -until it recommences. The snapping of a twig will be enough to -silence the bird and to make it fly away. It will be seen then that -to approach a capercailzie is a difficult task, and one requiring -infinite patience. Once within shot, there is no particular fun in -shooting a sitting bird the size of a turkey, up at the top of a -tree, even though it only appears as a dusky mass against the faint -beginnings of dawn. - -The real charm of this blackcock and capercailzie shooting was that -one would not otherwise have {174} been out in the great forest at -break of day. - -To me there was always an infinite fascination in seeing these great -Northern tracts of woodland awakening from their long winter sleep. -The sweetness of the dawn, the delicious smell of growing things, the -fresh young life springing up under one's feet, all these appealed to -every fibre in my being. Nature always restores the balance of -things. In Russia, as in Canada, after the rigours of the winter, -once the snow has disappeared, flowers carpet the ground with a -rapidity of growth unknown in more temperate climates. These Finland -woods were covered with a low creeping plant with masses of small, -white, waxy flowers. It was, I think, one of the smaller -cranberries. There was an orange-flowering nettle, too, the leaves -of which changed from green to vivid purple as they climbed the -stalk, making gorgeous patches of colour, and great drifts of blue -hepaticas on the higher ground. To appreciate Nature properly, she -must be seen at unaccustomed times, as she bestirs herself after her -night's rest whilst the sky brightens. - -In Petrograd itself the British Colony found plenty of amusement. We -had an English ice-hill club to which all the Embassy belonged. The -elevation of a Russian ice-hill, some forty feet only, may seem tame -after the imposing heights of Canadian toboggan slides, but I fancy -that the pace travelled is greater in Russia. The ice-hills were -always built in pairs, about three hundred yards apart, with two -parallel runs. Both hills {175} and runs were built of solid blocks -of ice, watered every day, and the pitch of the actual hill was very -steep. In the place of a toboggan we used little sleds two feet -long, mounted on skate-runners, which were kept constantly sharpened. -These travelled over the ice at a tremendous pace, and at the end of -the straight run, the corresponding hill had only to be mounted to -bring you home again to the starting-point. The art of steering -these sleds was soon learnt, once the elementary principle was -grasped that after a turn to the left, a corresponding turn to the -right must be made to straighten up the machine, exactly as is done -instinctively on a bicycle. A wave of the hand or of the foot was -enough to change the direction, the ice-hiller going down head -foremost, with the sled under his chest. - -Longer sleds were used for taking ladies down. The man sat -cross-legged in front, whilst the lady knelt behind him with both her -arms round his neck. Possibly the enforced familiarity of this -attitude was what made the amusement so popular. - -We gave at times evening parties at the ice-hills, when the woods -were lit up with rows of Chinese lanterns, making a charming effect -against the snow, and electric arcs blazed from the summits of the -slides. To those curious in such matters, I may say that as -secondary batteries had not then been invented, and we had no dynamo, -power was furnished direct by powerful Grove two-cell batteries. One -night our amateur electrician was {176} nearly killed by the brown -fumes of nitrous acid these batteries give off from their negative -cells. - -We had an ice-boat on the Gulf of Finland as well. It is only in -early spring, and very seldom then, that this amusement can be -indulged in. The necessary conditions are (1) a heavy thaw to melt -all the snow from the surface of the ice, followed by a sharp frost; -(2) a strong breeze. Nature is not often obliging enough to arrange -matters in this sequence. We had some good sailing, though, and -could get forty miles an hour out of our craft with a decent breeze. -Our boat was of the Dutch, not the Canadian type. I was astonished -to find how close an ice-boat could lay to the wind, for obviously -anything in the nature of leeway is impossible with a boat on -runners. Ice-sailing was bitterly cold work, and the navigation of -the Gulf of Finland required great caution, for in early spring great -cracks appeared in the ice. On one occasion, in avoiding a large -crack, we ran into the omnibus plying on runners between Kronstadt -and the mainland. The driver of the coach was drunk, and lost his -head, to the terror of his passengers, but very little damage was -done. It may be worth while recording this, as it is but seldom that -a boat collides with an omnibus. - -It will be seen that in one way and another there was no lack of -amusement to be found round Petrograd, even during the entire -cessation of Court and social entertainments. - - - - -{177} - -CHAPTER VI - -Love of Russians for children's games--Peculiarities of Petrograd -balls--Some famous beauties of Petrograd Society--The varying garb of -hired waiters--Moscow--Its wonderful beauty--The forest of domes--The -Kremlin--The three famous "Cathedrals"--The Imperial Treasury--The -Sacristy--The Palace--Its splendour--The Terem--A Gargantuan Russian -dinner--An unusual episode at the French Ambassador's -ball--Bombs--Tsarskoe Selo--Its interior--Extraordinary collection of -curiosities in Tsarskoe Park--Origin of term "Vauxhall" for railway -station in Russia--Peterhof--Charm of park there--Two Russian -illusions--A young man of 25 delivers an Ultimatum to Russia--How it -came about--M. de Giers--Other Foreign Ministers--Paraguay--The -polite Japanese dentist--A visit to Gatchina--Description of the -Palace--Delights of the children's play-room there. - - -The lingering traces of the child which are found in most Russian -natures account probably for their curious love of indoor games. -Lady Dufferin had weekly evening parties during Lent, when dancing -was rigidly prohibited. Quite invariably, some lady would go up to -her and beg that they might be allowed to play what she would term -"English running games." So it came about that bald-headed Generals, -covered with Orders, and quite elderly ladies, would with immense -glee play "Blind-man's buff," "Musical chairs," "Hunt the slipper," -and "General post." I believe that they would have joined cheerfully -in "Ring a ring of roses," had we only thought of it. - -{178} - -I think it is this remnant of the child in them which, coupled with -their quick-working brains, wonderful receptivity, and absolute -naturalness, makes Russians of the upper class so curiously -attractive. - -At balls in my time, oddly enough, quadrilles were the most popular -dances. There was always a "leader" for these quadrilles, whose -function it was to invent new and startling figures. The "leader" -shouted out his directions from the centre of the room, and however -involved the figures he devised, however complicated the manoeuvres -he evolved, he could rely on being implicitly obeyed by the dancers, -who were used to these intricate entanglements, and enjoyed them. -Woe betide the "leader" should he lose his head, or give a wrong -direction! He would find two hundred people inextricably tangled up. -I calculate that many years have been taken off my own life by the -responsibilities thrust upon me by being frequently made to officiate -in this capacity. Balls in Petrograd in the "'eighties" invariably -concluded with the "Danse Anglaise," our own familiar "Sir Roger de -Coverley." - -I never saw an orchestra at a ball in Petrograd, except at the Winter -Palace. All Russians preferred a pianist, but a pianist of a quite -special brand. These men, locally known as "tappeurs," cultivated a -peculiar style of playing, and could get wonderful effects out of an -ordinary grand piano. There was in particular one absolute genius -{179} called Altkein. Under his superlatively skilled fingers the -piano took on all the resonance and varied colour of a full -orchestra. Altkein told me that he always played what he called -"four-handed," that is doubling the parts of each hand. By the end -of the evening he was absolutely exhausted. - -The most beautiful woman in Petrograd Society was unquestionably -Countess Zena Beauharnais, afterwards Duchess of Leuchtenberg; a -tall, queenly blonde with a superb figure. Nature had been very -generous to her, for in addition to her wonderful beauty, she had a -glorious soprano voice. I could not but regret that she and her -sister, Princess Bieloselskava, had not been forced by circumstances -to earn their living on the operatic stage, for the two sisters, -soprano and contralto, would certainly have achieved a European -reputation with their magnificent voices. How they would have played -Amneris and the title-rôle in "Aïda"! The famous General Skobeleff -was their brother. - -Two other strikingly beautiful women were Princess Kitty Dolgorouki, -a piquant little brunette, and her sister-in-law, winning, -golden-haired Princess Mary Dolgorouki. After a lapse of nearly -forty years, I may perhaps be permitted to express my gratitude to -these two charming ladies for the consistent kindness they showered -on a peculiarly uninteresting young man, and I should like to add to -their names that of Countess Betsy Schouvaloff. I may remark that -the somewhat {180} homely British forms of their baptismal names -which these _grandes dames_ were fond of adopting always amused me. -Our two countries were in theory deadly enemies, yet they borrowed -little details from us whenever they could. I think that the racial -animosity was only skin-deep. This custom of employing English -diminutives for Russian names extended to the men too, for Prince -Alexander Dolgorouki, Princess Kitty's husband, was always known as -"Sandy," whilst Countess Betsy's husband was invariably spoken of as -"Bobby" Schouvaloff. Countess Betsy, mistress of one of the -stateliest houses in Petrograd, was acknowledged to be the -best-dressed woman in Russia. I never noticed whether she were -really good-looking or not, for such was the charm of her animation, -and the sparkle of her vivacity and quick wit, that one remarked the -outer envelope less than the nimble intellect and extraordinary -attractiveness that underlay it. She was a daughter of that -"Princesse Château" to whom I referred earlier in these reminiscences. - -In the great Russian houses there were far fewer liveried servants -than is customary in other European countries. This was due to the -difficulty of finding sufficiently trained men. The actual work of -the house was done by hordes of bearded, red-shirted shaggy-headed -moujiks, who their household duties over, retired to their -underground fastnesses. Consequently when dinners or other -entertainments were given recourse was had {181} to hired waiters, -mostly elderly Germans. It was the curious custom to dress these -waiters up in the liveries of the family giving the entertainment. -The liveries seldom fitted, and the features of the old waiters were -quite familiar to most of us, yet politeness dictated that we should -pretend to consider them as servants of the house. Though perfectly -conscious of having seen the same individual who, arrayed in orange -and white, was standing behind one's chair, dressed in sky-blue only -two evenings before, and equally aware of the probability of meeting -him the next evening in a different house, clad in crimson, it was -considered polite to compliment the mistress of the house on the -admirable manner in which her servants were turned out. - -There is in all Russian houses a terrible place known as the -"buffetnaya." This is a combination of pantry, larder, and -serving-room. People at all particular about the cleanliness of -their food, or the nicety with which it is served, should avoid this -awful spot as they would the plague. A sensitive nose can easily -locate the whereabouts of the "buffetnaya" from a considerable -distance. - -From Petrograd to Moscow is only a twelve hours' run, but in those -twelve hours the traveller is transported into a different world. -After the soulless regularity of Peter the Great's sham classical -creation on the banks of the Neva, the beauty of the semi-Oriental -ancient capital comes as a perfect revelation. Moscow, glowing with -colour, {182} is seated like Rome on gentle hills, and numbers over -three hundred churches. These churches have each the orthodox five -domes, and this forest of domes, many of them gilt, others silvered, -some blue and gold, or striped with bands and spirals of vivid -colour, when seen amongst the tender greenery of May, forms a -wonderful picture, unlike anything else in the world. The winding, -irregular streets lined with buildings in every imaginable style of -architecture, and of every possible shade of colour; the remains of -the ancient city walls with their lofty watch-towers crowned with -curious conical roofs of grass-green tiles; the great irregular bulk -of the Kremlin, towering over all; make a whole of incomparable -beauty. There is in the world but one Moscow, as there is but one -Venice, and one Oxford. - -The great sea of gilded and silvered domes is best seen from the -terrace of the Kremlin overlooking the river, though the wealth of -detail nearer at hand is apt to distract the eye. The soaring -snow-white shaft of Ivan Veliki's tower with its golden pinnacles -dominates everything, though the three "Cathedrals," standing almost -side by side, hallowed by centuries of tradition, are very sacred -places to a Russian, who would consider them the heart of Moscow, and -of the Muscovite world. "Mother Moscow," they call her -affectionately, and I understand it. - -The Russian word "Sobor" is wrongly translated as "Cathedral." A -"sobor" is merely a {183} church of peculiar sanctity or of special -dignity. The three gleaming white, gold-domed churches of the -Kremlin are of quite modest dimensions, yet their venerable walls are -rich with the associations of centuries. In the Church of the -Assumption the Tsars, and later the Emperors, were all crowned; in -the Church of the Archangel the Tsars were buried, though the -Emperors lie in Petrograd. The dim Byzantine interior of the -Assumption Church, with its faded frescoes on a gold ground, and its -walls shimmering with gold, silver, and jewels, is immensely -impressive. Here is the real Russia, not the Petrograd stuccoed -veneered Russia of yesterday, but ancient Muscovy, sending its roots -deep down into the past. - -Surely Peter prepared the way for the destruction of his country by -uprooting this tree of ancient growth, and by trying to create in one -short lifetime a new pseudo-European Empire, with a new capital. - -The city should be seen from the Kremlin terrace as the light is -fading from the sky and the thousands of church-bells clash out their -melodious evening hymn. The Russians have always been master -bell-founders, and their bells have a silvery tone unknown in Western -Europe. In the gloaming, the Eastern character of the city is much -more apparent. The blaze of colour has vanished, and the dusky -silhouettes of the church domes take on the onion-shaped forms of the -Orient. Delhi, as seen in later years from the fort at {184} sunset -was curiously reminiscent of Moscow. - -I do not suppose that more precious things have ever been gathered -together under one roof than the Imperial Treasury at Moscow -contained in those days. The eye got surfeited with the sight of so -many splendours, and I can only recall the great collection of crowns -and thrones of the various Tsars. One throne of Persian workmanship -was studded with two thousand diamonds and rubies; another, also from -Persia, contained over two thousand large turquoises. There must -have been at least a dozen of these glittering thrones, but the most -interesting of all was the original ivory throne of the Emperors of -Byzantium, brought to Moscow in 1472 by Sophia Palaeologus, wife of -Ivan III. Constantine the Great may have sat on that identical -throne. It seems curious that the finest collection in the world of -English silver-ware of Elizabeth's, James I's, and Charles I's time -should be found in the Kremlin at Moscow, till it is remembered that -nearly all the plate of that date in England was melted down during -the Civil War of 1642-1646. I wonder what has become of all these -precious things now! - -The sacristy contains an equally wonderful collection of Church -plate. I was taken over this by an Archimandrite, and I had been -previously warned that he would expect a substantial tip for his -services. The Archimandrite's feelings were, however, to be spared -by my representing this tip as my contribution to the poor of his -parish. The Archimandrite {185} was so immensely imposing, with his -violet robes, diamond cross, and long flowing beard, that I felt -quite shy of offering him the modest five roubles which I was told -would be sufficient. So I doubled it. The Archimandrite pocketed it -joyfully, and so moved was he by my unexpected _largesse_, that the -excellent ecclesiastic at once motioned me to my knees, and gave me a -most fervent blessing, which I am persuaded was well worth the extra -five roubles. - -The Great Palace of the Kremlin was rebuilt by Nicholas I about 1840. -It consequently belongs to the "period of bad taste"; in spite of -that it is extraordinarily sumptuous. The St. George's Hall is 200 -feet long and 60 feet high; the other great halls, named after the -Russian Orders of Chivalry, are nearly as large. Each of these is -hung with silk of the same colour as the ribbon of the Order; St. -George's Hall, orange and black; St. Andrew's Hall, sky-blue; St. -Alexander Nevsky's, pink; St. Catherine's, red and white. I imagine -that every silkworm in the world must have been kept busy for months -in order to prepare sufficient material for these acres of silk-hung -walls. The Kremlin Palace may not be in the best of taste, but these -huge halls, with their jasper and malachite columns and profuse -gilding, are wonderfully gorgeous, and exactly correspond with one's -preconceived ideas of what an Emperor of Russia's palace ought to be -like. There is a chapel in the Kremlin Palace with the quaint title -of {186} "The Church of the Redeemer behind the Golden Railing." - -The really interesting portion of the Palace is the sixteenth century -part, known as the "Terem." These small, dim, vaulted halls with -their half-effaced frescoes on walls and ceilings are most -fascinating. It is all mediæval, but not with the mediævalism of -Western Europe; neither is it Oriental; it is pure Russian; simple, -dignified, and delightfully archaic. One could not imagine the old -Tsars in a more appropriate setting. Compared with the strident -splendours of the modern palace, the vaulted rooms of the old Terem -seem to typify the difference between Petrograd and Moscow. - -It so happened that later in life I was destined to become very -familiar with the deserted palace at Agra, in India, begun by Akbar, -finished by Shah Jehan. How different the Oriental conception of a -palace is from the Western! The Agra Palace is a place of shady -courts and gardens, dotted with exquisitely graceful pavilions of -transparent white marble roofed with gilded copper. No two of these -pavilions are similar, and in their varied decorations an -inexhaustible invention is shown. The white marble is so placed that -it is seen everywhere in strong contrast to Akbar's massive buildings -of red sandstone. During the Coronation ceremonies, King-Emperor -George V seated himself, of right, on the Emperor Akbar's throne in -the great Hall of Audience in Agra Palace. - -{187} - -Though Moscow may appear a dream-city when viewed from the Kremlin, -it is an eminently practical city as well. It was, in my time, the -chief manufacturing centre of Russia, and Moscow business-men had -earned the reputation of being well able to look after themselves. - -Another side of the life of the great city could be seen in the -immense Ermitage restaurant, where Moscow people assured you with -pride that the French cooking was only second to Paris. The little -Tartar waiters at the Ermitage were, drolly enough, dressed like -hospital orderlies, in white linen from head to foot. There might -possibly be money in an antiseptic restaurant, should some -enterprising person start one. The idea would be novel, and this is -an age when new ideas seem attractive. - -A Russian merchant in Moscow, a partner in an English firm, imagined -himself to be under a great debt of gratitude to the British Embassy -in Petrograd, on account of a heavy fine imposed upon him, which we -had succeeded in getting remitted. This gentleman was good enough to -invite a colleague and myself to dine at a certain "Traktir," -celebrated for its Russian cooking. I was very slim in those days, -but had I had any idea of the Gargantuan repast we were supposed to -assimilate, I should have borrowed a suit of clothes from the most -adipose person of my acquaintance, in order to secure additional -cargo-space. - -In the quaint little "Traktir" decorated in {188} old-Russian style, -after the usual fresh caviar, raw herrings, pickled mushrooms, and -smoked sturgeon of the "zakuska," we commenced with cold sucking-pig -eaten with horse-radish. Then followed a plain little soup, composed -of herrings and cucumbers stewed in sour beer. Slices of boiled -salmon and horse-radish were then added, and the soup was served -iced. This soup is distinctly an acquired taste. This was succeeded -by a simple dish of sterlets, boiled in wine, with truffles, -crayfish, and mushrooms. After that came mutton stuffed with -buckwheat porridge, pies of the flesh and isinglass of the sturgeon, -and Heaven only knows what else. All this accompanied by red and -white Crimean wines, Kvass, and mead. I had always imagined that -mead was an obsolete beverage, indulged in principally by ancient -Britons, and drunk for choice out of their enemies' skulls, but here -it was, foaming in beautiful old silver tankards; and perfectly -delicious it was! Oddly enough, the Russian name for it, "meod," is -almost identical with ours. - -Only once in my life have I suffered so terribly from repletion, and -that was in the island of Barbados, at the house of a hospitable -planter. We sat down to luncheon at one, and rose at five. The -sable serving-maids looked on the refusal of a dish as a terrible -slur on the cookery of the house, and would take no denial. "No, you -like dis, sar, it real West India dish. I gib you lilly piece." -What with turtle, and flying-fish, and calipash and calipee, and -pepper-pot, and devilled land-crabs, I {189} felt like the -boa-constrictor in the Zoological Gardens after his monthly meal. - -I was not fortunate enough to witness the coronation of either -Alexander III or that of Nicholas II. In the perfect setting of "the -Red Staircase," of the ancient stone-built hall known as the -"Granovitaya Palata," and of the "Gold Court," the ceremonial must be -deeply impressive. On no stage could more picturesque surroundings -possibly be devised. During the coronation festivities, most of the -Ambassadors hired large houses in Moscow, and transferred their -Embassies to the old capital for three weeks. At the coronation of -Nicholas II, of unfortunate memory, the French Ambassador, the Comte -de Montebello, took a particularly fine house in Moscow, the -Shérémaitieff Palace, and it was arranged that he should give a great -ball the night after the coronation, at which the newly-crowned -Emperor and Empress would be present. The French Government own a -wonderful collection of splendid old French furniture, tapestries, -and works of art, known as the "Garde Meubles." Under the Monarchy -and Empire, these all adorned the interiors of the various palaces. -To do full honour to the occasion, the French Government dispatched -vanloads of the choicest treasures of the "Garde Meubles" to Moscow, -and the Shérémaitieff Palace became a thing of beauty, with Louis -Quatorze Gobelins, and furniture made for Marie-Antoinette. To -enhance the effect, the Comte and Comtesse de Montebello {190} -arranged the most elaborate floral decorations, and took immense -pains over them. On the night of the ball, two hours before their -guests were due, the Ambassador was informed that the Chief of Police -was outside and begged for permission to enter the temporary Embassy. -Embassies enjoying what is known as "exterritoriality," none of the -police can enter except on the invitation of the Ambassador; much as -vampires, according to the legend, could only secure entrance to a -house at the personal invitation of the owner. It will be remembered -that these unpleasing creatures displayed great ingenuity in securing -this permission; indeed the really expert vampires prided themselves -on the dexterity with which they could inveigle their selected victim -into welcoming them joyfully into his domicile. The Chief of Police -informed the French Ambassador that he had absolutely certain -information that a powerful bomb had been introduced into the -Embassy, concealed in a flower-pot. M. de Montebello was in a -difficult position. On the previous day the Ambassador had -discovered that every single electric wire in the house had been -deliberately severed by some unknown hand. French electricians had -repaired the damage, but it was a disquieting incident in the -circumstances. The policeman was positive that his information was -correct, and the consequences of a terrific bomb exploding in one's -house are eminently disagreeable, so he gave his reluctant permission -to have the Embassy searched, though his earlier {191} guests might -be expected within an hour. Armies of police myrmidons appeared, and -at once proceeded to unpot between two and three thousand growing -plants, and to pick all the floral decorations to pieces. Nothing -whatever was found, but it would be unreasonable to expect secret -police, however zealous, to exhibit much skill as trained florists. -They made a frightful hash of things, and not only ruined the -elaborate decorations, but so managed to cover the polished floors -with earth that the rooms looked like ploughed fields, dancing was -rendered impossible, and poor Madame de Montebello was in tears. As -the guests arrived, the police had to be smuggled out through back -passages. This was one of the little amenities of life in a -bomb-ridden land. - -During the summer months I was much at Tsarskoe Selo. Tsarskoe is -only fourteen miles from Petrograd, and some of my Russian friends -had villas there. The gigantic Old Palace of Tsarskoe is merely an -enlarged Winter Palace, and though its garden façade is nearly a -quarter of a mile long, it is uninteresting and unimpressive, being -merely an endless repetition of the same details. I was taken over -the interior several times, but such a vast quantity of rooms leaves -only a confused impression of magnificence. I only recall the really -splendid staircase and the famous lapis-lazuli and amber rooms. The -lapis-lazuli room is a blaze of blue and gold, with walls, furniture, -and chandeliers encrusted with that precious substance. {192} The -amber room is perfectly beautiful. All the walls, cabinets, and -tables are made of amber of every possible shade, from straw-colour -to deep orange. There are also great groups of figures carved -entirely out of amber. Both the lapis and the amber room have -curious floors of black ebony inlaid with mother-of-pearl, forming a -very effective colour scheme. I have vague memories of the "gold" -and "silver" rooms, but very distinct recollections of the bedroom of -one of the Empresses, who a hundred years before the late Lord Lister -had discovered the benefits of antiseptic surgery had with some -curious prophetic instinct had her sleeping-room constructed on the -lines of a glorified modern operating theatre. The walls of this -quaint apartment were of translucent opal glass, decorated with -columns of bright purple glass, with a floor of inlaid -mother-of-pearl. Personally, I should always have fancied a faint -smell of chloroform lingering about the room. - -Catherine the Great had her monogram placed everywhere at Tsarskoe -Selo, on doors, walls, and ceilings. It was difficult to connect her -with the interlaced "E's," until one remembered that the Russian form -of the name is "Ekaterina." How wise the Russians have been in -retaining the so-called Cyrillian alphabet in writing their tongue! - -In other Slavonic languages, such as Polish and Czech, where the -Roman alphabet has been adopted, unholy combinations of "cz," "zh," -and "sz" have to be resorted to to reproduce sounds which the {193} -Cyrillian alphabet could express with a single letter; and the tragic -thing is that, be the letters piled together never so thickly, they -invariably fail to give the foreigner the faintest idea of how the -word should really be pronounced. Take the much-talked-of town of -Przemysl, for instance. - -The park of Tsarskoe is eighteen miles in circumference, and every -portion of it is thrown open freely to the public. In spite of being -quite flat, it is very pretty with its lake and woods, and was most -beautifully kept. To an English eye its trees seemed stunted, for in -these far Northern regions no forest trees attain great size. Limes -and oaks flourish moderately well, but the climate is too cold for -beeches. At the latitude of Petrograd neither apples, pears, nor any -kind of fruit tree can be grown; raspberries and strawberries are the -only things that can be produced, and they are both superlatively -good. The park at Tsarskoe was full of a jumble of the most -extraordinarily incongruous buildings and monuments; it would have -taken a fortnight to see them all properly. There was a Chinese -village, a Chinese theatre, a Dutch dairy, an English Gothic castle, -temples, hanging gardens, ruins, grottoes, fountains, and numbers of -columns, triumphal arches, and statues. On the lake there was a -collection of boats of all nations, varying from a Chinese sampan to -an English light four-oar; from a Venetian gondola to a Brazilian -catamaran. There was also a fleet of miniature men-of-war, and three -of Catherine's great {194} gilt state-barges on the lake. One arm of -the lake was spanned by a bridge of an extremely rare blue Siberian -marble. Anyone seeing the effect of this blue marble bridge must -have congratulated himself on the fact that it was extremely -improbable that any similar bridge would ever be erected elsewhere, -so rare was the material of which it was constructed. - -I never succeeded in finding the spot in Tsarskoe Park where a sentry -stands on guard over a violet which Catherine the Great once found -there. Catherine, finding the first violet of spring, ordered a -sentry to be placed over it, to protect the flower from being -plucked. She forgot to rescind the order, and the sentry continued -to be posted there. It developed at last into a regular tradition of -Tsarskoe, and so, day and night, winter and summer, a sentry stood in -Tsarskoe Park over a spot where, 150 years before, a violet once grew. - -The Russian name for a railway station is "Vauxhall," and the origin -of this is rather curious. The first railway in Europe opened for -passenger traffic was the Liverpool and Manchester, inaugurated in -1830. Five years later, Nicholas I, eager to show that Russia was -well abreast of the times, determined to have a railway of his own, -and ordered one to be built between Petrograd and Tsarskoe Selo, a -distance of fourteen miles. The railway was opened in 1837, without -any intermediate stations. Unfortunately, with the exception of a -few Court officials, no one ever wanted to go to Tsarskoe, so the -line could hardly be called a commercial {195} success. Then someone -had a brilliant idea! Vauxhall Gardens in South London were then at -the height of their popularity. The Tsarskoe line should be extended -two miles to a place called Pavlosk, where the railway company would -be given fifty acres of ground on which to construct a "Vauxhall -Gardens," outbidding its London prototype in attractions. No sooner -said than done! The Pavlosk "Vauxhall" became enormously popular -amongst Petrogradians in summer-time; the trains were crowded and the -railway became a paying proposition. As the Tsarskoe station was the -only one then in existence in Petrograd, the worthy citizens got into -the habit of directing their own coachmen or cabdrivers simply to go -"to Vauxhall." So the name got gradually applied to the actual -station building in Petrograd. When the Nicholas railway to Moscow -was completed, the station got to be known as the "Moscow Vauxhall." -And so it spread, until it came about that every railway station in -the Russian Empire, from the Baltic to the Pacific, derived its name -from a long-vanished and half-forgotten pleasure-garden in South -London, the memory of which is only commemorated to-day by a bridge -and a railway station on its site. The name "Vauxhall" itself is, I -believe, a corruption of "Folks-Hall," or of its Dutch variant -"Volks-hall." Even in my day the Pavlosk Vauxhall was a most -attractive spot, with an excellent orchestra, myriads of coloured -lamps, and a great semicircle of restaurants and refreshment booths. -When I {196} knew it, the Tsarskoe railway still retained its -original rolling-stock of 1837; little queer over-upholstered -carriages, and quaint archaic-looking engines. It had, I think, been -built to a different gauge to the standard Russian one; anyhow it had -no physical connection with the other railways. It was subsequently -modernised. - -Peterhof is far more attractive than Tsarskoe as it stands on the -Gulf of Finland, and the coast, rising a hundred feet from the sea, -redeems the place from the uniform dead flat of the other environs of -Petrograd. As its name implies, Peterhof is the creation of Peter -himself, who did his best to eclipse Versailles. His fountains and -waterworks certainly run Versailles very close. The Oriental in -Peter peeped out when he constructed staircases of gilt copper, and -of coloured marbles for the water to flow over, precisely as Shah -Jehan did in his palaces at Delhi and Agra. As the temperature both -at Delhi and Agra often touches 120° during the summer months, these -decorative cascades would appear more appropriate there than at -Peterhof, where the summer temperature seldom rises to 70°. - -The palace stands on a lofty terrace facing the sea. A broad -straight vista has been cut through the fir-woods opposite it, down -to the waters of the Gulf. Down the middle of this avenue runs a -canal flanked on either side by twelve fountains. When _les grandes -eaux_ are playing, the effect of this perspective of fountains and of -Peter's gilded water-chutes is really very fine indeed. I think that -the {197} Oriental in Peter showed itself again here. There is a -long single row of almost precisely similar fountains in front of the -Taj at Agra. - -As at Tsarskoe, the public have free access to every portion of the -park, which stretches for four miles along the sea, with many -gardens, countless fountains, temples and statues. There was in -particular a beautiful Ionic colonnade of pink marble, from the -summit of which cataracts of water spouted when the fountains played. -The effect of this pink marble temple seen through the film of -falling water was remarkably pretty. What pleased me were the two -small Dutch châteaux in the grounds, "Marly" and "Monplaisir," where -Peter had lived during the building of his great palace. These two -houses had been built by imported Dutch craftsmen, and the sight of a -severe seventeenth-century Dutch interior with its tiles and sober -oak-panelling was so unexpected in Russia. It was almost as much of -a surprise as is Groote Constantia, some sixteen miles south of Cape -Town. To drive down a mile-long avenue of the finest oaks in the -world, and to find at the end of it, amidst hedges of clipped pink -oleander and blue plumbago, a most perfect Dutch château, exactly as -Governor Van der Stell left it in 1667, is so utterly unexpected at -the southern extremity of the African Continent! Groote Constantia, -the property of the Cape Government, still contains all its original -furniture and pictures of 1667. It is the typical -seventeenth-century Continental château, the main building with its -façade {198} elaborately decorated in plaster, flanked by two wings -at right angles to it, but the last place in the world where you -would look for such a finished whole is South Africa. To add to the -unexpectedness, the vines for which Constantia is famous are grown in -fields enclosed with hedges, with huge oaks as hedgerow timber. This -gives such a thoroughly English look to the landscape that I never -could realise that the sea seen through the trees was the Indian -Ocean, and that the Cape of Good Hope was only ten miles away. -Macao, the ancient Portuguese colony forty-five miles from Hong-Kong, -is another "surprise-town." It is as though Aladdin's Slave of the -Lamp had dumped a seventeenth-century Southern European town down in -the middle of China, with churches, plazas, and fountains complete. - -There is really a plethora of palaces round Peterhof. They grow as -thick as quills on a porcupine's back. One of them, I cannot recall -which, had a really beautiful dining-room, built entirely of pink -marble. In niches in the four angles of the room were solid silver -fountains six feet high, where Naiads and Tritons spouted water fed -by a running stream. I should have thought this room more -appropriate to India than to Northern Russia, but one of the fondest -illusions Russians cherish is that they dwell in a semi-tropical -climate. - -In Petrograd, as soon as the temperature reached 60°, old gentlemen -would appear on the Nevsky dressed in white linen, with Panama hats, -and white {199} umbrellas, but still wearing the thickest of -overcoats. Should the sun's rays become just perceptible, iced Kvass -and lemonade were at once on sale in all the streets. On these -occasions I made myself quite popular at the Yacht Club by observing, -as I buttoned up my overcoat tightly before venturing into the open -air, that this tropical heat was almost unendurable. This invariably -provoked gratified smiles of assent. - -Another point as to which Russians were for some reason touchy was -the fact that the water of the Gulf of Finland is perfectly fresh. -Ships can fill their tanks from the water alongside for ten miles -below Kronstadt, and the catches of the fishing-boats that came in to -Peterhof consisted entirely of pike, perch, eels, roach, and other -fresh-water fish. Still Russians disliked intensely hearing their -sea alluded to as fresh-water. I tactfully pretended to ignore the -fringe of fresh-water reeds lining the shore at Peterhof, and after -bathing in the Gulf would enlarge on the bracing effect a swim in -real salt-water had on the human organism. This, and a few happy -suggestions that after the intense brine of the Gulf the waters of -the Dead Sea would appear insipidly brackish, conduced towards making -me amazingly popular. - -In my younger days I was never really happy without a daily swim -during the summer months. - -The woods sloping down to the Gulf are delightful in summer-time, and -are absolutely carpeted with flowers. The flowers seem to realise -how short the {200} span of life allotted to them is, and endeavour -to make the most of it. So do the mosquitoes. - -I have very vivid recollections of one especial visit to Peterhof. -In the summer of 1882, the Ambassador and two other members of the -Embassy were away in England on leave. The Chargé d'Affaires, who -replaced the Ambassador, was laid up with an epidemic that was -working great havoc then in Petrograd, as was the Second Secretary. -This epidemic was probably due to the extremely unsatisfactory -sanitary condition of the city. Consequently no one was left to -carry on the work of the Embassy but myself and the new Attaché, a -mere lad. - -The relations of Great Britain and France in the "'eighties" were -widely different from those cordial ones at present prevailing -between the two countries. Far from being trusted friends and -allies, the tension between England and France was often strained -almost to the breaking-point, especially with regard to Egyptian -affairs. This was due in a great measure to Bismarck's traditional -foreign policy of attempting to embroil her neighbours, to the -greater advantage of Germany. In old-fashioned surgery, doctors -frequently introduced a foreign body into an open wound in order to -irritate it, and prevent its healing unduly quickly. This was termed -a seton. Bismarck's whole policy was founded on the introduction of -setons into open wounds, to prevent their healing. His successors in -office endeavoured to continue this policy, but did {201} not -succeed, for though they might share Bismarck's entire want of -scruples, they lacked his commanding genius. - -Ismail, Khedive of Egypt since 1863, had brought his country to the -verge of bankruptcy by his gross extravagance. Great Britain and -France had established in 1877 a Dual Control of Egyptian affairs in -the interest of the foreign bondholders, but the two countries did -not pull well together. In 1879 the incorrigible Ismail was deposed -in favour of Tewfik, and two years later a military revolt was -instigated by Arabi Pasha. Very unwisely, attempts were made to -propitiate Arabi by making him a member of the Egyptian Cabinet, and -matters went from bad to worse. In May, 1882, the French and British -fleets appeared before Alexandria and threatened it, and on June 11, -1882, the Arab population massacred large numbers of the foreign -residents of Alexandria. Still the French Government refused to take -any definite action, and systematically opposed every proposal made -by the British Government. We were perfectly well aware that the -opposition of the French to the British policy was consistently -backed up by Russia, Russia being in its turn prompted from Berlin. -All this we knew. After the massacre of June 11, the French fleet, -instead of acting, sailed away from Alexandria. - -Amongst the usual daily sheaf of telegrams from London which the -Attaché and I decyphered on July 12, 1882, was one announcing that -the {202} British Mediterranean Squadron had on the previous day -bombarded and destroyed the forts of Alexandria, and that in two -days' time British marines would be landed and the city of Alexandria -occupied. There were also details of further steps that would be -taken, should circumstances render them necessary. All these facts -were to be communicated to the Russian Government at once. I went -off with this weighty telegram to the house of the Chargé d'Affaires, -whom I found very weak and feverish, and quite unable to rise from -his bed. He directed me to go forthwith to Peterhof, to see M. de -Giers, the Russian Minister for Foreign Affairs, who was there in -attendance on the Emperor, and to make my statement to him. I placed -the Attaché in charge of the Chancery, and had time admitted of it, I -should certainly have smeared that youth's cheeks and lips with some -burnt cork, to add a few years to his apparent age, and to delude -people into the belief that he had already begun to shave. The -dignity of the British Embassy had to be considered. I begged of him -to refrain from puerile levity in any business interviews he might -have, and I implored him to try to conceal the schoolboy under the -mask of the zealous official. I then started for Peterhof. It is -not often that a young man of twenty-five is called upon to deliver -what was virtually an Ultimatum to the mighty Russian Empire, and I -had no illusions whatever as to the manner in which my communication -would be received. - -{203} - -I saw M. de Giers at Peterhof, and read him my message. I have never -in my life seen a man so astonished; he was absolutely flabbergasted. -The Gladstone Government of 1880-85 was then in power in England, and -it was a fixed axiom with every Continental statesman (and not, I am -bound to admit, an altogether unfounded one) that under no -circumstances whatever would the Gladstone Cabinet ever take definite -action. They would talk eternally; they would never act. M. de -Giers at length said to me, "I have heard your communication with -great regret. I have noted what you have said with even deeper -regret." He paused for a while, and then added very gravely, "The -Emperor's regret will be even more profound than my own, and I will -not conceal from you that his Majesty will be highly displeased when -he learns the news you have brought me." I inquired of M. de Giers -whether he wished me to see the Emperor, and to make my communication -in person to His Imperial Majesty, and felt relieved when he told me -that it was unnecessary, as I was not feeling particularly anxious to -face an angry Autocrat alone. I left a transcript I had myself made -of the telegram I had decyphered with M. de Giers, and left. A -moment's reflection will show that to leave a copy of decoded -telegram with anyone would be to render the code useless. The -original cypher telegram would be always accessible, and a decypher -of it would be tantamount to giving away the code. It was our -practice to make transcripts, giving the {204} sense in totally -different language, and with the position of every sentence altered. - -After that, as events in Egypt developed, and until the Chargé -d'Affaires was about again, I journeyed to Peterhof almost daily to -see M. de Giers. We always seemed to get on very well together, in -spite of racial animosities. - -The clouds in Egypt rolled away, and with them the very serious -menace to which I have alluded. Events fortunately shaped themselves -propitiously, On September 13, 1882, Sir Garnet Wolseley utterly -routed Arabi's forces at Tel-el-Kebir; Arabi was deported to Ceylon, -and the revolt came to an end. - -A diplomat naturally meets Ministers of Foreign Affairs of many -types. There was a strong contrast between the polished and courtly -M. de Giers, who in spite of his urbanity could manage to infuse a -very strong sub-acid flavour into his suavity when he chose, and some -other Ministers with whom I have come in contact. A few years later, -when at Buenos Ayres, preliminary steps were taken for drawing up an -Extradition Treaty between Great Britain and Paraguay, and as there -were details which required adjusting, I was sent 1,100 miles up the -river to Asuncion, the unsophisticated capital of the Inland -Republic. Dr. ----, at that time Paraguayan Foreign Minister, was a -Guarani, of pure Indian blood. He did not receive me at the Ministry -for Foreign Affairs, for the excellent reason that there was no such -place in that primitive {205} republic, but in his own extremely -modest residence. When his Excellency welcomed me in the whitewashed -sala of that house, sumptuously furnished with four wooden chairs, -and nothing else whatever, he had on neither shoes, stockings, nor -shirt, and wore merely a pair of canvas trousers, and an unbuttoned -coat of the same material, affording ample glimpses of his somewhat -dusky skin. In the suffocating heat of Asuncion such a costume has -its obvious advantages; still I cannot imagine, let us say, the -French Minister for Foreign Affairs receiving the humblest member of -a Foreign Legation at the Quai d'Orsay with bare feet, shirtless, and -clad only in two garments. - -Dr. ----, in spite of being Indian by blood, spoke most correct and -finished Spanish, and had all the courtesy which those who use that -beautiful language seem somehow to acquire instinctively. It is to -be regretted that the same cannot be said of all those using the -English language. Not to be outdone by this polite Paraguayan, I -responded in the same vein, and we mutually smothered each other with -the choicest flowers of Castilian courtesy. These little amenities, -though doubtless tending to smooth down the asperities of life, are -apt to consume a good deal of time. - -Once at Kyoto in Japan, I had occasion for the services of a dentist. -As the dentist only spoke Japanese, I took my interpreter with me. -After removing my shoes at the door--an unusual preliminary to a -visit to a dentist--we went upstairs, where {206} we found a dapper -little individual in kimono and white socks, surrounded by the most -modern and up-to-date dental paraphernalia, sucking his breath, and -rubbing his knees with true Japanese politeness. Eager to show that -a foreigner could also have delightful manners, I sucked my breath, -if anything, rather louder, and rubbed my knees a trifle harder. -"Dentist says," came from the interpreter, "will you honourably deign -to explain where trouble lies in honourable tooth?" - -"If the dentist will honourably deign to examine my left-hand lower -molar," I responded with charming courtesy, "he will find it requires -stopping, but for Heaven's sake, Mr. Nakimura, ask him to be careful -how he uses his honourable drill, for I am terrified to death at that -invention of the Evil One." Soon the Satanic drill got well into its -stride, and began boring into every nerve of my head. I jumped out -of the chair. "Tell the dentist, Mr. Nakimura, that he is honourably -deigning to hurt me like the very devil with his honourable but -wholly damnable drill." "Dentist says if you honourably deign to -reseat yourself in chair, he soon conquer difficulties in your -honourable tooth." "Certainly. But dentist must not give me -honourable hell any more," and so on, and so on. I am bound to admit -that the little Jap's workmanship was so good that it has remained -intact up to the present days. I wonder if Japs, when annoyed, can -ever relieve themselves by the use of really strong language, or -whether the crust of conventional politeness is too thick to {207} -admit of it. In that case they must feel like a lobster afflicted -with acute eczema, unable to obtain relief by scratching himself, -owing to the impervious shell in which Nature has encased him. - -I dined with the British Consul at Asuncion, after my interview with -Dr. ----. The Consul lived three miles out of town, and the coffee -we drank after dinner, the sugar we put into the coffee, and the -cigars we smoked with it, had all been grown in his garden, within -sight of the windows. I had ridden out to the Quinta in company with -a young Australian, who will reappear later on in these pages in his -proper place; one Dick Howard. It was the first but by no means the -last time in my life that I ever got on a horse in evening clothes. -Dick Howard, having no evening clothes with him, had arrayed himself -in one of his favourite cricket blazers, a pleasantly vivid garment. -On our way out, my horse shied violently at a snake in the road. The -girths slipped on the grass-fed animal, and my saddle rolled gently -round and deposited me, tail-coat, white tie and all, in some four -feet of dust. The snake, however, probably panic-stricken at the -sight of Howard's blazer, had tactfully withdrawn; otherwise, as it -happened to be a deadly Jararaca, it is highly unlikely that I should -have been writing these lines at the present moment. The -ineradicable love of Dick Howard, the cheery, laughing young -Antipodean, for brilliant-hued blazers of various athletic clubs will -be enlarged on later. In Indian hill stations all men habitually -ride out to dinner-parties, {208} whilst ladies are carried in -litters. During the rains, men put a suit of pyjamas over their -evening clothes to protect them, before drawing on rubber boots and -rubber coats and venturing into the pelting downpour. The Syce trots -behind, carrying his master's pumps in a rubber sponge-bag. - -All this, however, is far afield from Russia. Alexander III -preferred Gatchina to any of his other palaces as a residence, as it -was so much smaller, Gatchina being a cosy little house of 600 rooms -only. I never saw it except once in mid-winter, when the Emperor -summoned the Ambassador there, and I was also invited. As the -far-famed beauties of Gatchina Park were covered with four feet of -snow, it would be difficult to pronounce an opinion upon them. The -rivers and lakes, the haunts of the celebrated Gatchina trout, were, -of course, also deep-buried. - -Alexander III was a man of very simple tastes, and nothing could be -plainer than the large study in which he received us. Alexander III, -a Colossus of a man, had great dignity, combined with a geniality of -manner very different from the glacial hauteur of his father, -Alexander II. The Emperor was in fact rather partial to a humorous -anecdote, and some I recalled seemed to divert his Majesty. Outside -his study-door stood two gigantic negroes on guard, in Eastern -dresses of green and scarlet. The Empress Marie, though she did not -share her sister Queen Alexandra's wonderful beauty, had all of her -subtle and indescribable charm of manner, {209} and she was very -gracious to a stupid young Secretary-of-Embassy. - -The bedroom given to me at Gatchina could hardly be described by the -standardised epithets for Russian interiors "bare, gaunt, and -whitewashed," as it had light blue silk walls embroidered with large -silver wreaths. The mirrors were silvered, and the bed stood in a -species of chancel, up four steps, and surrounded by a balustrade of -silvered carved wood. Both the Ambassador and I agreed that the -Imperial cellar fully maintained its high reputation. We were given -in particular some very wonderful old Tokay, a present from the -Emperor of Austria, a wine that was not on the market. - -We were taken all over the palace, which contained, amongst other -things, a large riding-school and a full-sized theatre. The really -enchanting room was a large hall on the ground floor where many -generations of little Grand-Dukes and Grand-Duchesses had played. -As, owing to the severe winter climate, it is difficult for Russian -children to amuse themselves much out-of-doors, these large -play-rooms are almost a necessity in that frozen land. The Gatchina -play-room was a vast low hall, a place of many whitewashed arches. -In this delightful room was every possible thing that could attract a -child. At one end were two wooden Montagnes Busses, the descent of -which could be negotiated in little wheeled trollies. In another -corner was a fully-equipped gymnasium. There were "giants' strides," -swings, swing-boats and a {210} merry-go-round. There was a toy -railway with switches and signal-posts complete, the locomotives of -which were worked by treadles, like a tricycle. There were dolls' -houses galore, and larger houses into which the children could get, -with real cooking-stoves in the little kitchens, and little parlours -in which to eat the results of their primitive culinary experiments. -There were mechanical orchestras, self-playing pianos and -barrel-organs, and masses and masses of toys. On seeing this -delectable spot, I regretted for the first time that I had not been -born a Russian Grand-Duke, between the ages though of five and twelve -only. - -I believe that there is a similar room at Tsarskoe although I never -saw it. - - - - -{211} - -CHAPTER VII - -Lisbon--The two Kings of Portugal, and of Barataria--King Fernando -and the Countess--A Lisbon bull-fight--The "hat-trick"--Courtship -window-parade--The spurred youth of Lisbon--Portuguese -politeness--The De Reszke family--The Opera--Terrible personal -experiences in a circus--The bounding Bishop--Ecclesiastical -possibilities--Portuguese coinage--Beauty of Lisbon--Visits of the -British Fleet--Misguided midshipmen--The Legation Whaleboat--"Good -wine needs no bush"--A delightful orange-farm--Cintra--Contrast -between the Past and Present of Portugal. - - -A professional diplomat becomes used to rapid changes in his -environment. He has also to learn to readjust his monetary -standards, for after calculating everything in roubles for, let us -say, four years, he may find himself in a country where the peseta or -the dollar are the units. At every fresh post he has to start again -from the beginning, as he endeavours to learn the customs and above -all the mentality of the new country. He has to form a brand-new -acquaintance, to get to know the points of view of those amongst whom -he is living, and in general to shape himself to totally new -surroundings. A diplomat in this way insensibly acquires -adaptability. - -It would be difficult to imagine a greater contrast to Petrograd than -Lisbon, which was my next post. {212} After the rather hectic gaiety -of Petrograd, with its persistent flavour of an exotic and artificial -civilisation, the placid, uneventful flow of life at Lisbon was -restful, possibly even dull. - -Curiously enough, in those days there were two Kings of Portugal at -the same time. This state of things (which always reminded me -irresistibly of the two Kings of Barataria in Gilbert and Sullivan's -"Gondoliers") had come about quite naturally. Queen Maria II (Maria -da Gloria) had married in 1836 Prince Ferdinand of Saxe-Coburg, who -was raised next year to the title of King Consort. Maria II died in -1853 and was succeeded by Pedro V. During his son's minority King -Ferdinand acted as Regent, and Pedro, dying unmarried eight years -after, was succeeded in turn by his brother Luiz, also a son of King -Ferdinand. - -When the Corps Diplomatique were received at the Ajuda Palace on New -Year's Day, the scene always struck me as being intensely comical. -The two Kings (universally known as Dom Fernando and Dom Luiz) -entered simultaneously by different doors. When they met Dom Luiz -made a low bow to Dom Fernando, and then kissed his father's hand. -Dom Fernando responded with an equally low bow, and kissed his son's -hand. The two Kings then ascended the throne together. Had "The -Gondoliers" been already composed then, I should have expected the -two Monarchs to break into the duet from the second act, "Rising -early in the Morning," in which the two Kings of Barataria {213} -explain their multitudinous duties. As King Luiz had a fine tenor -voice, His Majesty could also in that case have brightened up the -proceedings by singing us "Take a pair of sparkling eyes." - -Dom Fernando was a perfectly delightful old gentleman, very highly -cultured, full of humour, and with a charming natural courtesy of -manner. The drolly-named Necessidades Palace which he inhabited was -an unpretentious house full of beautiful old Portuguese furniture. -Most of the rooms were wainscoted with the finest "azulejos" I ever -saw; blue and white tiles which the Portuguese adopted originally -from the Moors, but learnt later to make for themselves under the -tuition of Dutch craftsmen from Delft. These "azulejos" form the -most decorative background to a room that can be imagined. A bold -pictorial design, a complete and elaborate picture in blue on white, -runs along their whole length. It is thus very difficult to remove -and re-erect "azulejos," for one broken tile will spoil the whole -design. The Portuguese use these everywhere, both for the exteriors -and interiors of their houses, and also as garden ornaments, and they -are wonderfully effective. - -Dom Fernando had married morganatically, as his second wife, a dancer -of American origin. This lady had a remarkably strident voice, and -was much to the fore on the fortnightly afternoons when Dom Fernando -received the men of the Corps Diplomatique. For some reason or -other, the ladies of the Diplomatic Body always found themselves -{214} unable to attend these gatherings. The courteous, genial old -King would move about, smilingly dispensing his truly admirable -cigars, and brimful of anecdotes and jokelets. The nasal raucaus -tones of the ex-dancer, always known as "the Countess," would summon -him in English. "Say, King! you just hurry up with those cigars. -They are badly wanted here." - -I imagine that in the days of her successes on the stage the lady's -outline must have been less voluminous than it was when I made her -acquaintance. The only other occasion when I heard a monarch -addressed as "King" _tout court_ was when a small relation of my own, -aged five, at a children's garden-party at Buckingham Palace insisted -on answering King Edward VII's questions with a "Yes, O King," or -"No, O King"; a form of address which had a pleasant Biblical flavour -about it. - -The Portuguese are a very humane race, and are extraordinarily kind -to animals. They are also devoted to bull-fights. These two -tendencies seem irreconcilable, till the fact is grasped that a -Portuguese bull-fight is absolutely bloodless. Neither bulls nor -horses are killed; the whole spectacle resolves itself into an -exhibition of horsemanship and skill. - -The bulls' horns are padded and covered with leather thongs. The -_picador_ rides a really good and highly-trained horse. Should he -allow the bull even to touch his horse with his padded horns, the -unfortunate _picador_ will get mercilessly hissed. {215} These -_picadores_ do not wear the showy Spanish dresses, but Louis Quinze -costumes of purple velvet with large white wigs. The _espada_ is -armed with a wooden sword only, which he plants innocuously on the -neck of the bull, and woe betide him should those tens of thousands -of eager eyes watching him detect a deviation of even one inch from -the death-dealing spot. He will be hissed out of the ring. On the -other hand, should he succeed in touching the fatal place with his -harmless weapon, his skill would be rewarded with thunders of -applause, and all the occupants of the upper galleries would shower -small change and cigarettes into the ring, and would also hurl their -hats into the arena, which always struck me as a peculiarly comical -way of expressing their appreciation. - -The _espada_ would gaze at the hundreds of shabby battered bowler -hats reposing on the sand of the arena with the same expression of -simulated rapture that a _prima donna_ assumes as floral tributes are -handed to her across the footlights. The _espada_, his hand on his -heart, would bow again and again, as though saying, "Are these lovely -hats really for me?" But after a second glance at the dilapidated -head-gear, covering the entire floor-space of the arena with little -sub-fuse hummocks, he would apparently change his mind. "It is -really amazingly good of you, and I do appreciate it, but I think on -the whole that I will not deprive you of them," and then an -exhibition of real skill occurred. The _espada_, taking up a hat, -would {216} glance at the galleries. Up went a hand, and the hat -hurtled aloft to its owner with unfailing accuracy; and this -performance was repeated perhaps a hundred times. I always -considered the _espada's_ hat-returning act far more extraordinary -than his futile manipulation of the inoffensive wooden sword. During -the aerial flights of the hats, two small acolytes of the _espada_, -his miniature facsimiles in dress, picked up the small change and -cigarettes, and, I trust, duly handed them over intact to their -master. The bull meanwhile, after his imaginary slaughter, had -trotted home contentedly to his underground quarters, surrounded by -some twenty gaily-caparisoned tame bullocks. To my mind Spanish -bull-fighting is revolting and horrible to the last degree. I have -seen it once, and nothing will induce me to assist a second time at -so disgusting a spectacle; but the most squeamish person can view a -Portuguese bull-fight with impunity. Even though the bull has his -horns bandaged, considerable skill and great acrobatic agility come -into play. Few of us would care to stand in the path of a charging -polled Angus bull, hornless though he be. The _bandarilheros_ who -plant paper-decorated darts in the neck of the charging bull are as -nimble as trained acrobats, and vault lightly out of the ring when -hard pressed. Conspicuous at a Lisbon bull-fight are a number of -sturdy peasants, tricked out in showy clothes of scarlet and orange. -These are "the men of strength." Should a bull prove cowardly in the -ring, and decline to fight, the public {217} clamour for him to be -caught and expelled ignomiously from the ring by "the men of -strength." Eight of the stalwart peasants will then hurl themselves -on to the bull and literally hustle him out of the arena; no mean -feat. Take it all round, a Portuguese bull-fight was picturesque and -full of life and colour, though the neighbouring Spaniards affected -an immense contempt for them on account of their bloodlessness and -make-belief. - -A curious Portuguese custom is one which ordains that a youth before -proposing formally for a maiden's hand must do "window parade" for -two months (in Portuguese "fazer a janella"). Nature has not -allotted good looks to the majority of the Portuguese race, and she -has been especially niggardly in this respect to the feminine element -of the population. The taste for olives and for caviar is usually -supposed to be an acquired one, and so may be the taste for -Lusitanian loveliness. Somewhat to the surprise of the foreigner, -Portuguese maidens seemed to inspire the same sentiments in the -breasts of the youthful male as do their more-favoured sisters in -other lands, but in _bourgeois_ circles the "window-parade" was an -indispensable preliminary to courtship. The youth had to pass -backwards and forwards along the street where the dwelling of his -_innamorata_ was situated, casting up glances of passionate appeal to -a window, where, as he knew, the form of his enchantress would -presently appear. The maiden, when she judged that she might at -length reveal herself {218} without unduly encouraging her suitor, -moved to the open window and stood fanning herself, laboriously -unconscious of her ardent swain in the street below. The youth would -then express his consuming passion in pantomime, making frantic -gestures in testimony of his mad adoration. The senhorita in return -might favour him with a coy glance, and in token of dismissal would -perhaps drop him a rose, which the young man would press to his lips -and then place over his heart, and so the performance came to an end, -to be renewed again the next evening. The lovesick swain would -almost certainly be wearing spurs. At first I could not make out why -the young men of Lisbon, who had probably never been on a horse in -their whole lives, should habitually walk about the town with spurs -on their heels. It was, I think, a survival of the old Peninsular -tradition, and was intended to prove to the world that they were -"cavalleiros." In Spain an immense distinction was formerly made -between the "caballero" and the "peon"; the mounted man, or -gentleman, and the man on foot, or day-labourer. The little -box-spurs were the only means these Lisbon youths had of proving -their quality to the world. They had no horses, but they _had_ -spurs, which was obviously the next best thing. - -Fortunes in Portugal being small, and strict economy having to be -observed amongst all classes, I have heard that these damsels of the -window-sill only dressed down to the waist. They would assume a -_corsage_ of scarlet or crimson plush, and, {219} their nether -garments being invisible from below, would study both economy and -comfort by wearing a flannel petticoat below it. It is unnecessary -for me to add that I never verified this detail from personal -observation. - -Some of the old Portuguese families occupied very fine, if sparsely -furnished, houses, with _enfilades_ of great, lofty bare rooms. -After calling at one of these houses, the master of it would in -Continental fashion "reconduct" his visitor towards the front door. -At every single doorway the Portuguese code of politeness dictated -that the visitor should protest energetically against his host -accompanying him one step further. With equal insistence the host -expressed his resolve to escort his visitor a little longer. The -master of the house had previously settled in his own mind exactly -how far he was going towards the entrance, the distance depending on -the rank of the visitor, but the accepted code of manners insisted -upon these protests and counter-protests at every single doorway. - -In Germany "door-politeness" plays a great part. In one of -Kotzebue's comedies two provincial notabilities of equal rank are -engaged in a duel of "door-politeness." "But I must really insist on -your Excellency passing first." "I could not dream of it, your -Excellency. I will follow you." "Your Excellency knows that I could -never allow that," and so on. The curtain falls on these two ladies -each declining to precede the other, and when it rises on the second -act the doorway is still there, {220} and the two ladies are still -disputing. Quite an effective stage-situation, and one which a -modern dramatist might utilise. - -In paying visits in Lisbon one was often pressed to remain to dinner, -but the invitation was a mere form of politeness, and was not -intended to be accepted. You invariably replied that you deeply -regretted that you were already engaged. The more you were urged to -throw over your engagement, the deeper became your regret that this -particular engagement must be fulfilled. The engagement probably -consisted in dining alone at the club, but under no circumstances -must the invitation be accepted. In view of the straitened -circumstances of most Portuguese families, the evening meal would -probably consist of one single dish of _bacalhao_ or salt cod, and -you would have put your hosts to the greatest inconvenience. - -With the exception of the Opera, the Lisbon theatres were most -indifferent. When I first arrived there the Lisbon Opera had been -fortunate enough to secure the services of a very gifted Polish -family, a sister and two brothers, the latter of whom were destined -later to become the idols of the London public. They were Mlle. de -Reszke and Jean and Edouard de Reszke, all three of them then -comparatively unknown. Mlle. de Reszke had the most glorious voice. -To hear her singing with her brother Jean in "Faust" was a perfect -revelation. Mlle. de Reszke appeared to the best advantage when the -stalwart Jean sang with her, for she was {221} immensely tall, and -towered over the average portly, stumpy, little operatic tenor. The -French say, cruelly enough, "bête comme un ténor." This may or may -not be true, but the fact remains that the usual stage tenor is -short, bull-necked, and conspicuously inclined to adipose tissue. -When her brother Jean was out of the cast, it required an immense -effort of the imagination to picture this splendid creature as being -really desperately enamoured of the little paunchy, swarthy -individual who, reaching to her shoulder only, was hurling his high -notes at the public over the footlights. - -At afternoon parties these three consummate artists occasionally sang -unaccompanied trios. I have never heard anything so perfectly done. -I am convinced that had Mlle. de Reszke lived, she would have -established as great a European reputation as did her two brothers. -The Lisbon musical public were terribly critical. They had one most -disconcerting habit. Instead of hissing, should an artist have been -unfortunate enough to incur their displeasure, the audience stood up -and began banging the movable wooden seats of the stalls and dress -circle up and down. This produced a deafening din, effectually -drowning the orchestra and singers. The effect on the unhappy artist -against whom all this pandemonium was directed may be imagined. On -gala nights the Lisbon Opera was decorated in a very simple but -effective manner. Most Portuguese families own a number of -"colchas," or embroidered bed-quilts. These are of satin, silk, -{222} or linen, beautifully worked in colours. On a gala night, -hundreds of these "colchas" were hung over the fronts of the boxes -and galleries, with a wonderfully decorative effect. In the same -way, on Church festivals, when religious processions made their way -through the streets, many-lined "colchas" were thrown over the -balconies of the houses, giving an extraordinarily festive appearance -to the town. - -As at Berlin and Petrograd, there was a really good circus at Lisbon. -I, for one, am sorry that this particular form of entertainment is -now obsolete in England, for it has always appealed to me, in spite -of some painful memories connected with a circus which, if I may be -permitted a long digression, I will relate. - -Nearly thirty years ago I left London on a visit to one of the -historic châteaux of France, in company with a friend who is now a -well-known member of Parliament, and also churchwarden of a famous -West-end church. We travelled over by night, and reached our -destination about eleven next morning. We noticed a huge circular -tent in the park of the château, but paid no particular attention to -it. The first words with which our hostess, the bearer of a great -French name, greeted us were, "I feel sure that I can rely upon you, -_mes amis_. You have to help us out of a difficulty. My son and his -friends have been practising for four months for their amateur -circus. Our first performance is to-day at two o'clock. We have -sold eight hundred tickets for the benefit of the French Red Cross, -{223} and yesterday, only yesterday, our two clowns were telegraphed -for. They have both been ordered to the autumn manoeuvres, and you -two must take their places, or our performance is ruined. _Je sais -que vous n'allez pas me manquer_." In vain we both protested that we -had had no experience whatever as clowns, that branch of our -education having been culpably neglected. Our hostess insisted, and -would take no denial. "Go and wash; go and eat; and then put on the -dresses you will find in your rooms." I never felt so miserable in -my life as I did whilst making up my face the orthodox dead white, -with scarlet triangles on the cheeks, big mouth, and blackened nose. -The clown's kit was complete in every detail, with wig, conical hat, -patterned stockings and queer white felt shoes. As far as externals -went, I was orthodoxy itself, but the "business," and the "wheezes"! -The future church-warden had been taken in hand by some young -Frenchmen. As he was to play "Chocolat," the black clown, they -commenced by stripping him and blacking him from head to foot with -boot-blacking. They then polished him. - -I entered the ring with a sinking heart. I was to remain there two -hours, and endeavour to amuse a French audience for that period -without any preparation whatever. "Business," "gag," and "patter" -had all to be improvised, and the "patter," of course, had to be in -French. Luckily, I could then throw "cart-wheels" and turn -somersaults to an indefinite extent. So I made my entrance in {224} -that fashion. Fortunately I got on good terms with my audience -almost at once, and with confidence came inspiration; and with -inspiration additional confidence, and a judicious recollection of -the stock-tricks of clowns in various Continental capitals. Far -greater liberties can be taken with a French audience than would be -possible in England, but if anyone thinks it an easy task to go into -a circus ring and to clown for two hours on end in a foreign -language, without one minute's preparation, let him try it. The -ring-master always pretends to flick the clown; it is part of the -traditional "business"; but this amateur ring-master (most -beautifully got up) handled his long whip so unskilfully that he not -only really flicked my legs, but cut pieces out of them. When I -jumped and yelled with genuine pain, the audience roared with -laughter, so of course the ring-master plied his whip again. At the -end of the performance my legs were absolutely raw. The clown came -off badly too in some of the "roughs-and-tumbles," for the clown is -always fair game. The French amateurs gave a really astonishingly -good performance. They had borrowed trained horses from a real -circus, and the same young Hungarian to whom I have alluded at the -beginning of these reminiscences as having created a mild sensation -by appearing at Buckingham Palace in a tiger-skin tunic trimmed with -large turquoises, rode round the ring on a pad in sky-blue tights, -bounding through paper hoops and over garlands of artificial flowers -as easily and {225} gracefully as though he had done nothing else all -his life. Later on in the afternoon this versatile Hungarian -reappeared in flowing Oriental robes and a false beard as "Ali Ben -Hassan, the Bedouin Chief." Riding round the ring at full gallop, -and firing from the saddle with a shot-gun, he broke glass balls with -all the dexterity of a trained professional. That young Hungarian is -now a bishop of the Roman Catholic Church. Before 1914 I had -occasion to meet him frequently. Whenever I thought that on the -strength of his purple robes he was assuming undue airs of -ecclesiastical superiority (to use the word "swanking" would be an -unpardonable vulgarism, especially in the case of a bishop), I -invariably reminded his lordship of the afternoon, many years ago, -when, arrayed in sky-blue silk tights, he had dashed through paper -hoops in a French amateur circus. My remarks were usually met with -the deprecatory smile and little gesture of protest of the hand so -characteristic of the Roman ecclesiastic, as the bishop murmured, -"_Cher ami, tout cela est oublié depuis longtemps,_" I assured the -prelate that for my own part I should never forget it, if only for -the unexpected skill he had displayed; though I recognise that -bishops may dislike being reminded of their past, especially when -they have performed in circuses in their youth. - -In addition to the Hungarian's "act," there was another beautiful -exhibition of horsemanship. A boy of sixteen, a member of an -historic French family, by dint of long, patient, and painful {226} -practice, was able to give an admirable performance of the familiar -circus "turn" known as "The Courier of St. Petersburg," in which the -rider, standing a-straddle on two barebacked ponies, drives four -other ponies in front of him; an extraordinary feat for an amateur to -have mastered. My friend the agile ecclesiastic is portrayed, -perhaps a little maliciously, in Abel Hermant's most amusing book -"Trains de Luxe," under the name of "Monseigneur Granita de Caffe -Nero." It may interest ladies to learn that this fastidious prelate -always had his purple robes made by Doucet, the famous Paris -dressmaking firm, to ensure that they should "sit" properly. On the -whole, our circus was really a very creditable effort for amateurs. - -The entertainment was, I believe, pronounced a tremendous success, -and at its conclusion the only person who was the worse for it was -the poor clown. He had not only lost his voice entirely, from -shouting for two hours on end, but he was black and blue from head to -foot. Added to which, his legs were raw and bleeding from the -ring-master's pitiless whip. I am thankful to say that in the course -of a long life that was my one and only appearance in the ring of a -circus. My fellow-clown, "Chocolat," the future member of Parliament -and churchwarden, had been so liberally coated with boot-blacking by -his French friends that it refused to come off, and for days -afterwards his face was artistically decorated with swarthy patches. - -Before 1914, I had frequently pointed out to my {227} friend the -bishop that should he wish to raise any funds in his Hungarian -diocese he could not do better than repeat his performance in the -French circus. As a concession to his exalted rank, he might wear -tights of episcopal purple. Should he have retained any of the -nimbleness of his youth, his flock could not fail to be enormously -gratified at witnessing their chief pastor bounding through paper -hoops and leaping over obstacles with incredible agility for his age. -The knowledge that they had so gifted and supple a prelate would -probably greatly increase his moral influence over them and could -scarcely fail to render him amazingly popular. Could his lordship -have convinced his flock that he could demolish the arguments of any -religious opponent with the same ease that he displayed in -penetrating the paper obstacles to his equestrian progress, he would -certainly be acclaimed as a theological controversialist of the first -rank. In the same way, I have endeavoured to persuade my friend the -member of Parliament that he might brighten up the proceedings in the -House of Commons were he to appear there occasionally in the clown's -dress he wore thirty years ago in France. Failing that, his -attendance at the Easter Vestry Meeting of his West-end church with a -blackened face might introduce that note of hilarity which is often -so markedly lacking at these gatherings. - -All this has led me far away from Lisbon in the "'eighties." Mark -Twain has described, in "A Tramp Abroad," the terror with which a -foreigner {228} is overwhelmed on being presented with his first -hotel bill on Portuguese territory. The total will certainly run -into thousands of reis, and the unhappy stranger sees bankruptcy -staring him in the face. - -As a matter of fact, one thousand reis equal at par exactly four and -twopence. It follows that a hundred reis are the equivalent of -fivepence, and that one rei is the twentieth of a penny. - -A French colleague of mine insisted that the Portuguese were actuated -by national pride in selecting so small a monetary unit. An -elementary calculation will show that the proud possessor of £222 -10_s._ can claim to be a millionaire in Portugal. According to my -French friend, Portugal was anxious to show the world that though a -small country, a larger proportion of her subjects were millionaires -than any other European country could boast of. In the same way the -Frenchman explained the curious Lisbon habit of writing a number over -every opening on the ground floor of a house, whether door or window. -As a result the numbers of the houses crept up rapidly to the most -imposing figures. It was not uncommon to find a house inscribed No. -2000 in a comparatively short street. Accordingly, Lisbon, though a -small capital, was able to gain a spurious reputation for immense -size. - -A peculiarity of Lisbon was the double set of names of the principal -streets and squares: the official name, and the popular one. I have -never known this custom prevail anywhere else. Thus the {229} -principal street was officially known as Rua Garrett, and that name -was duly written up. Everyone, though, spoke of it as the "Chiada." -In the same way the splendid square facing the Tagus which English -people call "Black Horse Square" had its official designation written -up as "Praça do Comercio." It was, however, invariably called -"Terreiro do Paço." The list could be extended indefinitely. Street -names in Lisbon did not err in the matter of shortness. "Rua do -Sacramento a Lapa de Baixio" strikes me as quite a sufficiently -lengthy name for a street of six houses. - -Lisbon is certainly a handsome town. It has been so frequently -wrecked by earthquakes that there is very little mediæval -architecture remaining, in spite of its great age. Two notable -exceptions are the Tower of Belem and the exquisitely beautiful -cloisters of the Hieronymite Convent, also at Belem. The tower -stands on a promontory jutting into the Tagus, and the convent was -built in the late fifteen-hundreds to commemorate the discovery of -the sea route to India by Vasco da Gama. These two buildings are -both in the "Manoeline" style, a variety of highly ornate late Gothic -peculiar to Portugal. It is the fashion to sneer at Manoeline -architecture, with its profuse decoration, as being a decadent style. -To my mind the cloisters of Belem (the Portuguese variant of -Bethlehem) rank as one of the architectural masterpieces of Europe. -Its arches are draped, as it were, with a lace-work of intricate and -minute stone carving, as delicate {230} almost as jewellers' work. -The warm brown colour of the stone adds to the effect, and anyone but -an architectural pedant must admit the amazing beauty of the place. -The finest example of Manoeline in Portugal is the great Abbey of -Batalha, in my day far away from any railway, and very difficult of -access. - -At the time of the great earthquake of 1755 which laid Lisbon in -ruins, Portugal was fortunate enough to have a man of real genius at -the head of affairs, the Marquis de Pombal. Pombal not only -re-established the national finances on a sound basis, but rebuilt -the capital from his own designs. The stately "Black Horse Square" -fronting the Tagus and the streets surrounding it were all designed -by Pombal. I suppose that there is no hillier capital in the world -than Lisbon. Many of the streets are too steep for the tramcars to -climb. The Portuguese fashion of coating the exteriors of the houses -with bright-coloured tiles of blue and white, or orange and white, -gives a cheerful air to the town,--the French word "riant" would be -more appropriate--and the numerous public gardens, where the -palm-trees apparently grow as contentedly as in their native tropics, -add to this effect of sunlit brightness. As in Brazil and other -Portuguese-speaking countries, the houses are all very tall, and -sash-windows are universal, as in England, contrary to the custom of -other Continental countries. - -House rent could not be called excessive in Portugal. In my day -quite a large house, totally lacking {231} in every description of -modern convenience, but with a fine staircase and plenty of lofty -rooms, could be hired for £30 a year, a price which may make the -Londoner think seriously of transferring himself to the banks of the -Tagus. - -In the "'eighties" Lisbon was the winter headquarters of our Channel -Squadron. I once saw the late Admiral Dowdeswell bring his entire -fleet up the Tagus under sail; a most wonderful sight! The two -five-masted flagships, the _Minotaur_ and the _Agincourt_, had very -graceful lines, and with every stitch of their canvas set, they were -things of exquisite beauty. The _Northumberland_ had also been -designed as a sister ship, but for some reason had had two of her -masts removed. The old _Minotaur,_ now alas! a shapeless hulk known -as _Ganges II_, is still, I believe, doing useful work at Harwich. - -As may be imagined, the arrival of the British Fleet infused a -certain element of liveliness into the sleepy city. Gambling-rooms -were opened all over Lisbon, and as the bluejackets had a habit of -wrecking any place where they suspected the proprietor of cheating -them, the Legation had its work cut out for it in endeavouring to -placate the local authorities and smooth down their wounded -susceptibilities. One gambling-house, known as "Portuguese Joe's," -was frequented mainly by midshipmen. They were strictly forbidden to -go there, but the place was crammed every night with them, in spite -of official prohibition. The British midshipman being a creature of -impulse, the {232} moment these youths (every one of whom thought it -incumbent on his dignity to have a huge cigar in his mouth, even -though he might still be of very tender years) suspected any foul -play, they would proceed very systematically and methodically to -smash the whole place up to matchwood. There was consequently a good -deal of trouble, and the Legation quietly put strong pressure on the -Portuguese Government to close these gambling-houses down -permanently. This was accordingly done, much to the wrath of the -midshipmen, who were, I believe, supplied with free drinks and cigars -by the proprietors of these places. It is just possible that the -Admiral's wishes may have been consulted before this drastic action -was taken. Midshipmen in those days went to sea at fourteen and -fifteen years of age, and consequently needed some shepherding. - -As our Minister had constantly to pay official visits to the Fleet, -the British Government kept a whale-boat at Lisbon for the use of the -Legation. The coxswain, an ex-naval petty officer who spoke -Portuguese, acted as Chancery servant when not afloat. When the boat -was wanted, the coxswain went down to the quay with two bagfuls of -bluejackets' uniforms, and engaged a dozen chance Tagus boatmen. The -Lisbon boatman, though skilful, is extraordinarily unclean in his -person and his attire. I wish the people who lavished praises on the -smart appearance of the Legation whaleboat and of its scratch crew -could have seen, as I {233} often did, the revoltingly filthy -garments of these longshoremen before they drew the snowy naval white -duck trousers and jumpers over them. Their persons were even -dirtier, and--for reasons into which I need not enter--it was -advisable to smoke a strong cigar whilst they were pulling. The -tides in the Tagus run very strong; at spring-tides they will run -seven or eight knots, so considerable skill is required in handling a -boat. To do our odoriferous whited sepulchres of boatmen justice, -they could pull, and the real workmanlike man-of-war fashion in which -our coxswain always brought the boat alongside a ship, in spite of -wind and tremendous tide, did credit to himself, and shed a mild -reflected glory on the Legation. - -The country round Lisbon is very arid. It produces, however, most -excellent wines, both red and white, and in my time really good wine -could be bought for fourpence a bottle. At the time of the vintage, -all the country taverns and wine shops displayed a bush tied to a -pole at their doors, as a sign that they had new wine, "green wine," -as the Portuguese call it, for sale. Let the stranger beware of that -new wine! Though pleasant to the palate and apparently innocuous, it -is in reality hideously intoxicating, as a reference to the 13th -verse of the second chapter of the Acts will show. I think that the -custom of tying a bush to the door of a tavern where new wine is on -sale must be the origin of the expression "good wine needs no bush." - -{234} - -The capabilities of this apparently intractable and arid soil when -scientifically irrigated were convincingly shown on a farm some -sixteen miles from Lisbon, belonging to a Colonel Campbell, an -Englishman. Colonel Campbell, who had permanently settled in -Portugal, had bought from the Government a derelict monastery and the -lands attached to it at Torres Vedras, where Wellington entrenched -himself in his famous lines in 1809-10. A good stream of water ran -through the property, and Colonel Campbell diverted it, and literally -caused the desert to blossom like the rose. Here were acres and -acres of orange groves, and it was one of the few places in Europe -where bananas would ripen. Colonel Campbell supplied the whole of -Lisbon with butter, and the only mutton worth eating came also from -his farm. It was a place flowing, if not with milk and honey, at all -events with oil and wine. Here were huge tanks brimful of -amber-coloured olive oil; whilst in vast dim cellars hundreds of -barrels of red and white wine were slowly maturing in the mysterious -shadows. Outside the sunlight fell on crates of ripe oranges and -bananas, ready packed for the Lisbon market, and in the gardens -tropical and sub-tropical flowering trees had not only thoroughly -acclimatised themselves, but had expanded to prima-donna-like -dimensions. The great rambling tiled monastery made a delightful -dwelling-house, and to me it will be always a place of pleasant -memories--a place of sunshine and golden orange groves; of {235} -rustling palms and cool blue and white tiles; of splashing fountains -and old stonework smothered in a tangle of wine-coloured -Bougainvillea. - -The environs of all Portuguese towns are made dreary by the miles and -miles of high walls which line the roads. These people must surely -have some dark secrets in their lives to require these huge barriers -between themselves and the rest of the world. Behind the wall were -pleasant old _quintas_, or villas, faced with my favourite "azulejos" -of blue and white, and surrounded with attractive, ill-kept gardens, -where roses and oleanders ran riot amidst groves of orange and lemon -trees. - -Cintra would be a beautiful spot anywhere, but in this sun-scorched -land it comes as a surprising revelation; a green oasis in a desolate -expanse of aridity. - -Here are great shady oak woods and tinkling fern-fringed brooks, -pleasant leafy valleys, and a grateful sense of moist coolness. On -the very summit of the rocky hill of Pena, King Fernando had built a -fantastic dream-castle, all domes and pinnacles. It was exactly like -the "enchanted castle" of one of Gustave Doré's illustrations, and -had, I believe, been partly designed by Doré himself. Some of the -details may have been a little too flamboyant for sober British -tastes, but, perched on its lofty rock, this castle was surprisingly -effective from below with its gilded turrets and Moorish tiles. As -the castle occupied every inch of the summit of the Pena hill, the -only approach to it {236} was by a broad winding roadway tunnelled -through the solid rock. Openings had been cut in the sides of the -tunnel giving wonderful views over the valleys far down below. This -approach was for all the world like the rocky ways up which Parsifal -is led to the temple of the Grail in the first act of Wagner's great -mystery drama. The finest feature about Pena, to my mind, was the -wood of camellias on its southern face. These camellias had grown to -a great size, and when in flower in March they were a most beautiful -sight. - -There was a great deal of work at the Lisbon Legation, principally of -a commercial character. There were never-ending disputes between -British shippers and the Custom House authorities, and the extremely -dilatory methods of the Portuguese Government were most trying to the -temper at times. - -I shall always cherish mildly agreeable recollections of Lisbon. It -was a placid, sunlit, soporific existence, very different from the -turmoil of Petrograd life. The people were friendly, and as -hospitable as their very limited financial resources enabled them to -be. They could mostly speak French in a fashion, still their limited -vocabulary was quite sufficient for expressing their more limited -ideas. - -I never could help contrasting the splendid past of this little -nation with its somewhat inadequate present, for it must be -remembered that Portugal in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries was -the leading maritime Power of Europe. Portugal had {237} planted her -colonies and her language (surely the most hideous of all spoken -idioms!) in Asia, Africa, and South America long before Great Britain -or France had even dreamed of a Colonial Empire. - -They were a race of hardy and fearless seamen. Prince Henry the -Navigator, the son of John of Portugal and of John of Gaunt's -daughter, discovered Madeira, the Azores, and the Cape Verde islands -in the early fourteen-hundreds. - -In the same century Diaz doubled the Cape of Good Hope, and Vasco da -Gama succeeded in reaching India by sea, whilst Albuquerque founded -Portuguese colonies in Brazil and at Goa in India. This race of -intrepid navigators and explorers held the command of the sea long -before the Dutch or British, and by the middle of the sixteenth -century little Portugal ranked as one of the most powerful monarchies -in Europe. - -Portugal, too, is England's oldest ally, for the Treaty of Windsor -establishing an alliance between the two countries was signed as far -back as 1386. - -This is not the place in which to enter into the causes which led to -the gradual decadence of this wonderful little nation, sapped her -energies and atrophied her enterprise. To the historian those causes -are sufficiently familiar. - -Let us only trust that Lusitania's star may some day rise again. - - - - -{238} - -CHAPTER VIII - -Brazil--Contrast between Portuguese and Spanish South -America--Moorish traditions--Amazing beauty of Rio de Janeiro--Yellow -fever--The Commercial Court Chamberlain--The Emperor Pedro--The -Botanic Gardens of Rio--The quaint diversions of Petropolis--The -liveried young entomologist--Buenos Ayres--The charm of the -"Camp"--Water-throwing--A British Minister in Carnival time--Some -Buenos Ayres peculiarities--Masked balls--Climatic -conditions--Theatres--Restaurants--Wonderful bird-life of the -"Camp"--Estancis Negrete--Duck-shooting--My one flamingo--An -exploring expedition in the Gran Chaco--Hardships--Alligators and -fish--Currency difficulties. - - -My first impression of Brazil was that it was a mere transplanted -Portugal, but a Portugal set amidst the most glorious vegetation and -some of the finest scenery on the face of the globe. It is also -unquestionably suffocatingly hot. - -There is a great outward difference in the appearances of the towns -of Portuguese and Spanish South America. In Brazil the Portuguese -built their houses and towns precisely as they had done at home. -There are the same winding irregular streets; the same tall houses -faced with the decorative "azulejos"; the same shutterless -sash-windows. A type of house less suited to the burning climate of -Brazil can hardly be imagined. There being no outside shutters, it -is impossible to keep the heat {239} out, and the small rooms become -so many ovens. The sinuosities of the irregular streets give a -curiously old-world look to a Brazilian town, so much so that it is -difficult for a European to realise that he is on the American -Continent, associated as the latter is in our minds with unending -straight lines. - -In all Spanish-American countries the towns are laid out on the -chess-board principle, with long dreary perspectives stretching -themselves endlessly. The Spanish-American type of house too is -mostly one-storied and flat-roofed, with two iron-barred windows only -looking on to the street. The Moorish conquerors left their impress -on Spain, and the Spanish pioneers carried across the Atlantic with -them the Moorish conception of a house. The "patio" or enclosed -court in the centre of the house is a heritage from the Moors, as is -the flat roof or "azotea," and the decorated rainwater cistern in the -centre of the "patio." - -The very name of this tank in Spanish, "aljibe," is of Arabic origin, -and it becomes obvious that this type of house was evolved by -Mohammedans who kept their womenkind in jealous and strict seclusion. -No indiscreet eyes from outside can penetrate into the "patio," and -after nightfall the women could be allowed on to the flat roof to -take the air. Those familiar with the East know the great part the -roof of a house plays in the life of an Oriental. It is their -parlour, particularly after dark. As the inhabitants of South -America are not Mohammedans, I cannot conceive why they {240} -obstinately adhere to this inconvenient type of dwelling. The -"patio" renders the house very dark and airless, becomes a well of -damp in winter, and an oven in summer. To my mind unquestionably the -best form of house for a hot climate is the Anglo-Indian bungalow, -with its broad verandahs, thatched roof, and lofty rooms. In a -bungalow some of the heat can be shut out. - -On my first arrival in Brazil, the tropics and tropical vegetation -were an unopened book to me, and I was fairly intoxicated with their -beauty. - -There is a short English-owned railway running from Pernambuco to -some unknown spot in the interior. The manager of this railway came -out on the steamer with us, and he was good enough to take me for a -run on an engine into the heart of the virgin forest. I shall never -forget the impression this made on me. It was like a peep into a -wholly unimagined fairyland. - -Had the calls of the mail steamer been deliberately designed to give -the stranger a cumulative impression of the beauties of Brazil, they -could not have been more happily arranged. First of Pernambuco in -flat country, redeemed by its splendid vegetation; then Bahia with -its fine bay and gentle hills, and lastly Rio the incomparable. - -I have seen most of the surface of this globe, and I say -deliberately, without any fear of contradiction, that nowhere is -there anything approaching Rio in beauty. The glorious bay, two -hundred miles in circumference, dotted with islands, and {241} -surrounded by mountains of almost grotesquely fantastic outlines, the -whole clothed with exuberantly luxurious tropical vegetation, makes -the most lovely picture that can be conceived. - -The straggling town in my day had not yet blossomed into those -vagaries of ultra-ornate architecture which at present characterise -it. It was quaint and picturesque, and fitted its surroundings -admirably, the narrow crowded Ruado Ouvidor being the centre of the -fashionable life of the place. - -It will be remembered that when Gonçalves discovered the great bay on -January 1st, 1502, he imagined that it must be the estuary of some -mighty river, and christened it accordingly "the River of January," -"Rio de Janeiro." Oddly enough, only a few insignificant streams -empty themselves into this vast landlocked harbour. - -During my first fortnight in Rio, I thought the view over the bay -more beautiful with every fresh standpoint I saw it from; whether -from Botofogo, or from Nichteroy on the further shore, the view -seemed more entrancingly lovely every time; and yet over this, the -fairest spot on earth, the Angel of Death was perpetually hovering -with outstretched wings; for yellow fever was endemic at Rio then, -and yellow fever slays swiftly and surely. - -One must have lived in countries where the disease is prevalent to -realise the insane terror those two words "yellow fever" strike into -most people. On my third visit to Rio, I was destined to contract -the disease myself, but it dealt mercifully with me, {242} so -henceforth I am immune to yellow fever for the remainder of my life. -The ravages this fell disease wrought in the West Indies a hundred -years ago cannot be exaggerated. Those familiar with Michael Scott's -delightful "Tom Cringle's Log" will remember the gruesome details he -gives of a severe outbreak of the epidemic in Jamaica. In those days -"Yellow Jack" took toll of nearly fifty per cent. of the white civil -and military inhabitants of the British West Indies, as the countless -memorial tablets in the older West Indian churches silently testify. -Before my arrival in Rio, a new German Minister had, in spite of -serious warnings, insisted on taking a beautiful little villa on a -rocky promontory jutting into the bay. The house with its white -marble colonnades, its lovely gardens, and the wonderful view over -the mountains, was a thing of exquisite beauty, but it bore a very -evil reputation. Within eight months the German Minister, his -secretary, and his two white German servants were all dead of yellow -fever. The Brazilians declare that the fever is never contracted -during the daytime, but that sunset is the dangerous hour. They also -warn the foreigner to avoid fruit and acid drinks. - -Conditions have changed since then. The cause of the unhealthiness -of Rio was a very simple one. All the sewage of the city was -discharged into the landlocked, tideless bay, where it lay festering -under the scorching sun. An English company tunnelled a way through -the mountains direct to {243} the Atlantic, and all the sewage is now -discharged there, with the result that Rio is practically free from -the dreaded disease. - -The customs of a monarchial country are like a deep-rooted oak, they -do not stand transplanting. Where they are the result of the slow -growth of many centuries, they have adapted themselves, so to speak, -to the soil of the country of their origin, have evolved national -characteristics, and have fitted themselves into the national life. -When transplanted into a new country, they cannot fail to appear -anachronisms, and have always a certain element of the grotesque -about them. In my time Dom Pedro, the Emperor of Brazil, had -surrounded himself with a modified edition of the externals of a -European Court. A colleague of mine had recently been presented to -the Emperor at the Palace of São Christovão. As is customary on such -occasions, my colleague called on the two Court Chamberlains who were -on duty at São Christovão, and they duly returned the visit. One of -these Chamberlains, whom we will call Baron de Feijão e Farinha, -seemed reluctant to take his departure. He finally produced a bundle -of price lists from his pocket, and assured my colleague that he -would get far better value for his money at his (the Baron's) -ready-made clothing store than at any other similar establishment in -South America. From another pocket he then extracted a tape measure, -and in spite of my colleague's protest passed the tape over his -unwilling body to note the {244} stock size, in the event of an -order. The Baron de Feijão especially recommended one of his models, -"the Pall Mall," a complete suit of which could be obtained for the -nominal sum of 80,000 reis. This appalling sum looks less alarming -when reduced to British currency, 80,000 Brazilian reis being equal -to about £7 7_s_. I am not sure that he did not promise my colleague -a commission on any orders he could extract from other members of the -Legation. My colleague, a remarkably well-dressed man, did not -recover his equanimity for some days, after picturing his -neatly-garbed form arrayed in the appallingly flashy, ill-cut, -ready-made garments in which the youth of Rio de Janeiro were wont to -disport themselves. To European ideas, it was a little unusual to -find a Court Chamberlain engaged in the ready-made clothing line. - -On State occasions Dom Pedro assumed the most splendid Imperial -mantle any sovereign has ever possessed. It was composed entirely of -feathers, being made of the breasts of toucans, shaded from pale pink -to deep rose-colour, and was the most gorgeous bit of colour -imaginable. In the sweltering climate of Brazil, the heat of this -mantle must have been unendurable, and I always wondered how Dom -Pedro managed to bear it with a smiling face, but it certainly looked -magnificent. - -One of the industries of Rio was the manufacture of artificial -flowers from the feathers of humming-birds. These feather flowers -were wonderfully faithful reproductions of Nature, and were {245} -practically indestructible, besides being most artistically made. -They were very expensive. - -The famous avenue of royal palms in the Botanic Gardens would almost -repay anyone for the voyage from Europe. These are, I believe, the -tallest palms known, and the long avenue is strikingly impressive. -The _Oreodoxa regia_, one of the cabbage-palms, has a huge trunk, -perfectly symmetrical, and growing absolutely straight. This -perspective of giant boles recalls the columns of an immense Gothic -cathedral, whilst the fronds uniting in a green arch two hundred feet -overhead complete the illusion. The Botanic Gardens have some most -attractive ponds of pink and sky-blue water lilies, and the view of -the bay from the gardens is usually considered the finest in Rio. - -Owing to the unhealthiness of Rio, most of the Foreign Legations had -established themselves permanently at Petropolis, in the Organ -Mountains, Petropolis being well above the yellow fever zone. On my -third visit to Rio, such a terrible epidemic of yellow fever was -raging in the capital that the British Minister very kindly invited -me to go up straight to the Legation at Petropolis. The latter is -three hours' distance from Rio by mountain railway. People with -business in the city leave for Rio by the 7 a.m. train, and reach -Petropolis again at 7 p.m. The old Emperor, Dom Pedro, made a point -of attending the departure and arrival of the train every single day, -and a military band played regularly in the station, morning and -{246} evening. This struck me as a very unusual form of amusement. -The Emperor (who ten months later was quietly deposed) was a tall, -handsome old gentleman, of very distinguished appearance, and with -charming manners. He had also encyclopædic knowledge on most points. -That a sovereign should take pleasure in seeing the daily train -depart and arrive seemed to point to a certain lack of resources in -Petropolis, and to hint at moments of deadly dulness in the Imperial -villa there. Dom Pedro never appeared in public except in evening -dress, and it was a novelty to see the head of a State in full -evening dress and high hat at half-past six in the morning, listening -to an extremely indifferent brass band braying in the waiting-room of -a shabby railway station. - -Nature seems to have lavished all the most brilliant hues of her -palette on Brazil; the plumage of the birds, the flowers, and foliage -all glow with vivid colour. Even a Brazilian toad has bright -emerald-green spots all over him. The gorgeous butterflies of this -highly-coloured land are well known in Europe, especially those -lovely creatures of shimmering, iridescent blue. - -These butterflies were the cause of a considerable variation in the -hours of meals at the British Legation. - -The Minister had recently brought out to Brazil an English boy to act -as young footman. Henry was a most willing, obliging lad, but these -great Brazilian butterflies exercised a quite irresistible {247} -fascination over him, and small blame to him. He kept a -butterfly-net in the pantry, and the instant one of the brilliant, -glittering creatures appeared in the garden, Henry forgot everything. -Clang the front-door bell so loudly, he paid no heed to it; the cook -might be yelling for him to carry the luncheon into the dining-room, -Henry turned a deaf ear to her entreaties. Snatching up his -butterfly-net, he would dart through the window in hot pursuit. As -these great butterflies fly like Handley Pages, he had his work cut -out for him, and running is exhausting in a temperature of 90 -degrees. The usual hour for luncheon would be long past, and the -table would still exhibit a virgin expanse of white cloth. Somewhere -in the dim distance we could descry a slim young figure bounding -along hot-foot, with butterfly-net poised aloft, so we possessed our -souls in patience. Eventually Henry would reappear, moist but -triumphant, or dripping and despondent, according to his success or -failure with his shimmering quarry. After such violent exercise, -Henry had to have a plunge in the swimming-bath and a complete change -of clothing before he could resume his duties, all of which -occasioned some little further delay. And this would happen every -day, so our repasts may be legitimately described as "movable -feasts." It was no use speaking to Henry. He would promise to be -less forgetful, but the next butterfly that came flitting along drove -all good resolves out of this ardent young entomologist's head, and -off he would {248} go on flying feet in eager pursuit. I recommended -Henry when he returned to England to take up cross-country running -seriously. He seemed to have unmistakable aptitudes for it. - -The streets of Petropolis were planted with avenues of a flowering -tree imported from the Southern Pacific. When in bloom, this tree -was so covered with vivid pink blossoms that all its leaves were -hidden. These rows of bright pink trees gave the dull little town a -curious resemblance to a Japanese fan. - -There are some lovely little nooks and corners in the Organ -Mountains. One ravine in particular was most beautiful, with a -cascade dashing down the cliff, and the clear brook below it fringed -with eucharis lilies, and the tropical begonias which we laboriously -cultivate in stove-houses. Unfortunately, these beauty spots seemed -as attractive to snakes as they were to human beings. This entailed -keeping a watchful eye on the ground, for Brazilian snakes are very -venomous. - -No greater contrast can be imagined than that between the forests and -mountains of steamy Brazil and the endless, treeless, dead-flat -levels of the Argentine Republic, twelve hundred miles south of them. - -When I first knew Buenos Ayres in the early "'eighties," it still -retained an old-world air of distinction. The narrow streets were -lined with sombre, dignified old buildings of a markedly Spanish -type, and the modern riot of over-ornate ginger-bread {249} -architecture had not yet transformed the city into a glittering, -garish trans-Atlantic pseudo-Paris. In the same way newly-acquired -wealth had not begun to assert itself as blatantly as it has since -done. - -I confess that I was astonished to find two daily English newspapers -in Buenos Ayres, for I had not realised the size and importance of -the British commercial colony there. - -The "Camp" (from the Spanish _campo_, country) outside the city is -undeniably ugly and featureless, as it stretches its unending -khaki-coloured, treeless flatness to the horizon, but the sense of -immense space has something exhilarating about it, and the air is -perfectly glorious. In time these vast dun-coloured levels exercise -a sort of a fascination over one; to me the "Camp" will always be -associated with the raucous cries of the thousands of spurred -Argentine plovers, as they wheel over the horsemen with their -never-ending scream of "téro, téro." - -As in most countries of Spanish origin, the Carnival was kept at -Buenos Ayres in the old-fashioned style. In my time, on the last day -of the Carnival, Shrove Tuesday, the traditional water-throwing was -still allowed in the streets. Everyone going into the streets must -be prepared for being drenched with water from head to foot. My new -Chief, whom I will call Sir Edward (though he happened to have a -totally different name), had just arrived in Buenos Ayres. He was -quite {250} unused to South American ways. On Shrove Tuesday I came -down to breakfast in an old suit of flannels and a soft shirt and -collar, for from my experiences of the previous year I knew what was -to be expected in the streets. Sir Edward, a remarkably neat -dresser, appeared beautifully arrayed in a new suit, the smartest of -bow-ties, and a yellow jean waistcoat. I pointed out to my Chief -that it was water-throwing day, and suggested the advisability of his -wearing his oldest clothes. Sir Edward gave me to understand that he -imagined that few people would venture to throw water over her -Britannic Majesty's representative. Off we started on foot for the -Chancery of the Legation, which was situated a good mile from our -house. I knew what was coming. In the first five minutes we got a -bucket of water from the top of a house, plumb all over us, soaking -us both to the skin. Sir Edward was speechless with rage for a -minute or so, after which I will not attempt to reproduce his -language. Men were selling everywhere in the streets the large -squirts ("_pomitos_" in Spanish) which are used on these occasions. -I equipped myself with a perfect Woolwich Arsenal of _pomitos_, but -Sir Edward waved them all disdainfully away. Soon two girls darted -out of an open doorway, armed with _pomitos_, and caught us each -fairly in the face, after which they giggled and ran into their -house, leaving the front door open. Sir Edward fairly danced with -rage on the pavement, shouting out the most uncomplimentary opinions -as to the {251} Argentine Republic and its inhabitants. The front -door having been left open, I was entitled by all the laws of -Carnival time to pursue our two fair assailants into their house, and -I did so, in spite of Sir Edward's remonstrances. I chased the two -girls into the drawing-room, where we experienced some little -difficulty in clambering over sofas and tables, and I finally caught -them in the dining-room, where a venerable lady, probably their -grandmother, was reposing in an armchair. I gave the two girls a -thorough good soaking from my _pomitos_, and bestowed the mildest -sprinkling on their aged relative, who was immensely gratified by the -attention. "Oh! my dears," she cried in Spanish to the girls, "you -both consider me so old. You can see that I am not too old for this -young man to enjoy paying me a little compliment." - -_Autres pays, autres moeurs_! Just conceive the feelings of an -ordinary British middle-class householder, residing, let us say, at -Balham or Wandsworth, at learning that the sanctity of "The Laurels" -or "Ferndale" had been invaded by a total stranger; that his -daughters had been pursued round the house, and then soaked with -water in his own dining-room, and that even his aged mother's revered -white hairs had not preserved her from a like indignity. I cannot -imagine him accepting it as a humorous everyday incident. Our -progress to the Chancery was punctuated by several more interludes of -a similar character, and I was really pained on reaching the shelter -of our official {252} sanctuary to note how Sir Edward's spotless -garments had suffered. Personally, on a broiling February day -(corresponding with August in the northern hemisphere) I thought the -cool water most refreshing. Our Chancery looked on to the -fashionable Calle Florida, and a highly respectable German widow who -had lived for thirty years in South America acted as our housekeeper. -Sir Edward, considerably ruffled in his temper, sat down to continue -a very elaborate memorandum he was drawing up on the new Argentine -Customs tariff. The subject was a complicated one, there were masses -of figures to deal with, and the work required the closest -concentration. Presently our housekeeper, Fran Bauer, entered the -room demurely, and made her way to Sir Edward's table, - -"Wenn Excellenz so gut sein werden um zu entschuldigen," began Frau -Bauer with downcast eyes, and then suddenly with a discreet titter -she produced a large _pomito_ from under her apron and, secure in the -license of Carnival time, she thrust it into Sir Edward's collar, and -proceeded to squirt half a pint of cold water down his back, retiring -swiftly with elderly coyness amid an explosion of giggles. I think -that I have seldom seen a man in such a furious rage. I will not -attempt to reproduce Sir Edward's language, for the printer would -have exhausted his entire stock of "blanks" before I had got halfway -through. The Minister, when he had eased his mind sufficiently, -snapped out, "It is obvious that with all {253} this condemned (that -was not quite the word he used) foolery going on, it is impossible to -do any serious work to-day. Where ... where ... can one buy the -infernal squirts these condemned idiots vise?" "Anywhere in the -streets. Shall I buy you some, Sir Edward?" "Yes, get me a lot of -them, and the biggest you can find." So we parted. - -Returning home after a moist but enjoyable afternoon, I saw a great -crowd gathered at the junction of two streets, engaged in a furious -water-fight. The central figure was a most disreputable-looking -individual with a sodden wisp of linen where his collar should have -been; remnants of a tie trailed dankly down, his soaked garments were -shapeless, and his head was crowned with a sort of dripping poultice. -He was spouting water in all directions like the Crystal Palace -fountains in their heyday, with shouts of "Take that, you foolish -female; and that, you fat feminine Argentine!" With grief I -recognised in this damp reveller her Britannic Majesty's Minister -Plenipotentiary. - -Upon returning home, we found that our two English servants had been -having the time of their lives. They had stood all day on the roof -of the house, dashing pails of water over passers-by until they had -completely emptied the cistern. There was not one drop of water in -the house, and we had to borrow three pailfuls from a complaisant -neighbour. - -A few years later the police prohibited water-throwing altogether, so -this feature of a Buenos {254} Ayres Carnival is now a thing of the -past. - -As time went on I grew very fond of Sir Edward. His temper may have -flared up quickly, but it died down just as rapidly. He was a man -with an extraordinarily varied fund of information, and possessed a -very original and subtle sense of humour. He was also a great -stylist in writing English, and the drafts I wrote for despatches -were but seldom fortunate enough to meet with his approval. A split -infinitive brought him to the verge of tears. The Argentine -authorities were by no means easy to deal with, and Sir Edward -handled them in a masterly fashion. His quiet persistence usually -achieved its object. It was a real joy to see him dealing with -anyone rash enough to attempt to bully or browbeat him. His tongue -could sting like a lash on occasions, whilst he preserved an outward -air of imperturbable calm. Sir Edward both spoke and wrote the most -beautifully finished Spanish. - -A ball in a private house at Buenos Ayres had its peculiar features -in the "'eighties." In the first place, none of the furniture was -removed from the rooms, and so far from taking up carpets, carpets -were actually laid down, should the rooms be unprovided with them. -This rendered dancing somewhat difficult; in fact a ball resolved -itself into a leisurely arm-in-arm promenade to music through the -rooms, steering an erratic course between the articles of furniture, -"drawing the port," as a Scottish curler would put it. Occasionally -a {255} space behind a sofa could be found sufficiently large to -attempt a few mild gyrations, but that was all. The golden youth of -Buenos Ayres, in the place of the conventional white evening tie, all -affected the most deplorable bows of pale pink or pale green satin. -A wedding, too, differed from the European routine. The parents of -the bride gave a ball. At twelve o'clock dancing, or promenading -amidst the furniture, ceased. A portable altar was brought into the -room; a priest made his unexpected entry, and the young couple were -married at breakneck speed. At the conclusion of the ceremony, all -the young men darted at the bride and tore her marriage-veil to -shreds. Priest, altar, and the newly-married couple then -disappeared; the band struck up again, and dancing, or rather a -leisurely progress round the sofas and ottomans, recommenced. - -A form of entertainment that appeals immensely to people of Spanish -blood is a masked ball. In Buenos Ayres the ladies only were masked, -which gave them a distinct advantage over the men. To enjoy a -masquerade a good knowledge of Spanish is necessary. All masked -women are addressed indiscriminately as "mascarita" and can be -"tutoyée'd." Convention permits, too, anything within reasonable -limits to be said by a man to "mascaritas," who one and all assume a -little high-pitched head-voice to conceal their identities. I fancy -that the real attractions masquerades had for most women lay in the -opportunity they afforded every {256} "mascarita" of saying with -impunity abominably rude things to some other woman whom she -detested. I remember one "mascarita," an acquaintance of mine, whose -identity I pierced at once, giving another veiled form accurate -details not only as to the date when the pearly range of teeth she -was exhibiting to the world had come into her possession, but also -the exact price she had paid for them. - -It takes a stranger from the North some little time to accustom -himself to the inversion of seasons and of the points of the compass -in the southern hemisphere. For instance, "a lovely spring day in -_October_," or "a chilly autumn evening in _May_," rings curiously to -our ears; as it does to hear of a room with a cool _southern_ aspect, -or to hear complaints about the hot _north_ wind. Personally I did -not dislike the north wind; it was certainly moist and warm, but it -smelt deliciously fragrant with a faint spicy odour after its journey -over the great Brazilian forests on its way from the Equator. All -Argentines seemed to feel the north wind terribly; it gave them -headaches, and appeared to dislocate their entire nervous system. In -the Law Courts it was held to be a mitigating circumstance should it -be proved that a murder, or other crime of violence, had been -committed after a long spell of north wind. Many women went about -during a north wind with split beans on their temples to soothe their -headaches, a comical sight till one grew accustomed to it. The old -German {257} housekeeper of the Chancery, Frau Bauer, invariably had -split beans adhering to her temples when the north wind blew. - -The icy _pampero_, the south wind direct from the Pole, was the great -doctor of Buenos Ayres. Darwin used to consider the River Plate the -electrical centre of the world. Nowhere have I experienced such -terrific thunderstorms as in the Argentine. Sometimes on a stifling -summer night, with the thermometer standing at nearly a hundred -degrees, one of these stupendous storms would break over the city -with floods of rain. Following on the storm would come the -_pampero_, gently at first, but increasing in violence until a -blustering, ice-cold gale went roaring through the sweltering city, -bringing the temperature down in four hours with a run from 100 -degrees to 60 degrees. Extremely pleasant for those like myself with -sound lungs; very dangerous to those with delicate chests. - -The old-fashioned Argentine house had no protection over the _patio_. -In bad weather the occupants had to make their way through the rain -from one room to another. Some of the newer houses were built in a -style which I have seen nowhere else except on the stage. Everyone -is familiar with those airy dwellings composed principally of open -colonnades one sees on stage back-cloths. These houses were very -similar in design, with open halls of columns and arches, and -open-air staircases. On the stage it rains but seldom, and the style -may be suited to the climatic conditions prevailing there. {258} In -real life it must be horribly inconvenient. The Italian Minister at -Buenos Ayres lived in a house of this description. In fine weather -it looked extremely picturesque, but I imagine that his Excellency's -progress to bed must have been attended with some difficulties when, -during a thunderstorm, the rain poured in cataracts down his open-air -staircase, and the _pampero_ howled through his open arcades and -galleries. - -The theatres at Buenos Ayres were quite excellent. At the Opera all -the celebrated singers of Europe could be heard, although one could -almost have purchased a nice little freehold property near London for -the price asked for a seat. There were two French theatres, one -devoted to light opera, the other to Palais Royal farces, both -admirably given; and, astonishingly enough, during part of my stay, -there was actually an English theatre with an English stock company. -A peculiarly Spanish form of entertainment is the "Zarzuela," a sort -of musical farce. It requires a fairly intimate knowledge of the -language to follow these pieces with their many topical allusions. - -The Spanish-American temperament seems to dislike instinctively any -gloomy or morbid dramas, differing widely from the Russians in this -respect. At Petrograd, on the Russian stage, the plays, in addition -to the usual marital difficulties, were brightened up by allusions to -such cheerful topics as inherited tendencies to kleptomania or -suicide, or an intense desire for self-mutilation. What {259} -appeals to the morbid frost-bound North apparently fails to attract -the light-hearted sons of the southern hemisphere. - -Buenos Ayres was also a city of admirable restaurants. In the -fashionable places, resplendent with mirrors, coloured marbles and -gilding, the cooking rivals Paris, and the bill, when tendered, makes -one inclined to rush to the telegraph office to cable for further and -largely increased remittances from Europe. There were a number, -however, of unpretending French restaurants of the most meritorious -description. Never shall I forget Sir Edward's face when, in answer -to his questions as to a light supper, the waiter suggested a cold -armadillo; a most excellent dish, by the way, though after seeing the -creature in the Zoological Gardens one would hardly credit it with -gastronomic possibilities. The soil of the Argentine is marvellously -fertile, and some day it will become a great wine-growing country. -In the meantime vast quantities of inferior wine are imported from -Europe. After sampling a thin Spanish red wine, and a heavy sweet -black wine known as Priorato, and having tested their effects on his -digestion, Sir Edward christened them "The red wine of Our Lady of -Pain" and "The black wine of Death." - -When the President of the Republic appeared in public on great -occasions, he was always preceded by a man carrying a large blue -velvet bolster embroidered with the Argentine arms. This was {260} -clearly an emblem of national sovereignty, but what this blue bolster -was intended to typify I never could find out. Did it indicate that -it was the duty of the President to bolster up the Republic, or did -it signify that the Republic was always ready to bolster up its -President? None of my Argentine friends could throw any light upon -the subject further than by saying that this bolster was always -carried in front of the President; a sufficiently self-evident fact. -It will always remain an enigma to me. A bolster seems a curiously -soporific emblem for a young, enterprising, and progressive Republic -to select as its symbol. - -It would be ungallant to pass over without remark the wonderful -beauty of the Argentine girls. This beauty is very shortlived -indeed, and owing to their obstinate refusal to take any exercise -whatever, feminine outlines increase in bulk at an absurdly early -age, but between seventeen and twenty-one many of them are really -lovely. Lolling in hammocks and perpetual chocolate-eating bring -about their own penalties, and sad to say, bring them about very -quickly. I must add that the attractiveness of these girls is rather -physical than intellectual. - -The house Sir Edward and I rented had been originally built for a -stage favourite by one of her many warm-hearted admirers. It had -been furnished according to the lady's own markedly florid tastes. I -reposed nightly in a room entirely draped in sky-blue satin. The -house had a charming garden, {261} and Sir Edward and I expended a -great deal of trouble and a considerable amount of money on it. That -garden was the pride of our hearts, but we had reckoned without the -leaf-cutting ant, the great foe of the horticulturist in South -America. At Rio, and in other places in Brazil, they had a special -apparatus for pumping the fumes of burning sulphur into the -ant-holes, and so were enabled to keep these pests in check. In -private gardens in Brazil every single specially cherished plant had -to have its stem surrounded with unsightly circular troughs of -paraffin and water. In front of our windows we had a large bed of -gardenias backed by a splendid border of many-hued cannas which were -the apple of Sir Edward's eye, He gazed daily on them with an air not -only of pride, but of quasi-paternity. The leaf-cutting ants found -their way into our garden, and in four days nothing remained of our -beautiful gardenias and cannas but some black, leafless stalks. -These abominable insects swept our garden as bare of every green -thing as a flight of locusts would have done; they even killed the -grass where their serried processions had passed. - -For me, the great charm of the Argentine lay in the endless expanses -of the "Camp," far away from the noisy city. The show _estancia_ of -the Argentine was in those days "Negrete," the property of Mr. David -Shennan, kindest and most hospitable of Scotsmen. Most English -residents and visitors out in the Plate cherish grateful {262} -recollections of that pleasant spot, encircled by peach orchards, -where the genial proprietor, like a patriarch of old, welcomed his -guests, surrounded by his vast herds and flocks. I happen to know -the exact number of head of cattle Mr. Shennan had on his estancia on -January 1, 1884, for I was one of the counters at the stocktaking on -the last day of the year. The number was 18,731 head. - -Counting cattle is rather laborious work, and needs close -concentration. Six of us were in the saddle from daybreak to dusk, -with short intervals for meals, and December 31 is at the height of -the summer in the southern hemisphere, so the heat was considerable. - -This is the method employed in a "count." The cattle are driven into -"mobs" of some eight hundred ("Rodeo" is the Spanish term for mob) by -the "peons." Some twenty tame bullocks are driven a quarter of a -mile from the "mob," and the counters line up on their horses between -the two, with their pockets full of beans. The "peons" use their -whips, and one or two of the cattle break away from the herd to the -tame bullocks. They are followed by more and more at an -ever-increasing pace. Each one is counted, and when one hundred is -reached, a bean is silently transferred from the left pocket to the -right. So the process is continued until the entire herd has passed -by. Should the numbers given by the six counters tally within -reason, the count is accepted. Should it differ materially, there is -a recount; then the {263} counters pass on to another "mob" some two -miles away. Under a very hot sun, the strain of continual attention -is exhausting, and those six counters found their beds unusually -welcome that night. - -The dwelling-house of Negrete, which was to become very familiar to -me, was over a hundred years old, and stretched itself one-storied -round a large _patio_, blue and white tiled, with an elaborate -well-head in the centre decorated with good iron-work. The _patio_ -was fragrant with orange and lemon trees, and great bushes of the -lovely sky-blue Paraguayan jasmine. I can never understand why this -shrub, the "Jasmin del Paraguay," with its deliciously sweet perfume -and showy blue flowers, has never been introduced into England. It -would have to be grown under glass, but only requires sufficient heat -to keep the frost out. - -I had never felt the _joie de vivre_--the sheer joy at being -alive--thrill through one's veins so exultantly as when riding over -the "Camp" in early morning. I have had the same feeling on the High -Veldt in South Africa, where there is the same marvellous air, and, -in spite of the undulations of the ground, the same sense of vast -space. The glorious air, the sunlight, the limitless, treeless -expanse of neutral-tinted grass stretching endlessly to the horizon, -and the vast hemisphere of blue sky above had something absolutely -intoxicating in them. It may have been the delight of forgetting -that there were such things as towns, and streets, {264} and -tramways. And then the teeming bird-life of the camp! Ibis and -egrets flashed bronze-green or snowy-white through the sunlight; the -beautiful pink spoon-bills flapped noisily overhead in single file, a -lengthy rosy trail of long legs and necks and brilliant colour; the -quaint little ground owls blinked from the entrances of their -burrows, and dozens of spurred plovers wheeled in incessant -gyrations, keeping up their endless, wearying scream of "téro-téro." -I always wanted to shout and sing from sheer delight at being part of -it all. - -The tinamou, the South American partridge, surprisingly stupid birds, -rose almost under the horses' feet, and dozens of cheery little -sandpipers darted about in all directions. Birds, birds everywhere! -Should one pass near one of the great shallow lagoons, which are such -a feature of the country, its surface would be black with ducks, with -perhaps a regiment of flamingoes in the centre of it, a dazzling -patch of sunlit scarlet, against the turquoise blue the water -reflected from the sky. - -In springtime the "Camp" is covered with the trailing verbena which -in my young days was such a favourite bedding-out plant in England, -its flowers making a brilliant league-long carpet of scarlet or -purple. - -There are endless opportunities for shooting on the "Camp" in the -Province of Buenos Ayres, only limited by the difficulties in -obtaining cartridges, and the fact that in places where it is -impossible to dispose of the game the amount shot must depend {265} -on what can be eaten locally. Otherwise it is not sport, but becomes -wanton slaughter. - -The foolish tinamou are easily shot, but are exceedingly difficult to -retrieve out of the knee-high grass, and if only winged, they can run -like hares. There is also a large black and white migratory bird of -the snipe family, the "batitou," which appears from the frozen -regions of the Far South, as winter comes on, and is immensely prized -for the table. He is unquestionably a delicious bird to eat, but is -very hard to approach owing to his wariness. The duck-shooting was -absolutely unequalled. I had never before known that there were so -many ducks in the world, nor were there the same complicated -preliminaries, as with us; no keepers, no beaters, no dogs were -required. One simply put twenty cartridges in a bandolier, took -one's gun, jumped on a horse, and rode six miles or so to a selected -lagoon. Here the horse was tied up to the nearest fence, and one -just walked into the lagoon. So warm was the water in these lagoons -that I have stood waist-high in it for hours without feeling the -least chilly, or suffering from any ill effects whatever. With the -first step came a mighty and stupendous roar of wings, and a -prodigious quacking, then the air became black with countless -thousands of ducks. Mallards, shovellers, and speckled ducks; black -ducks with crimson feet and bills; the great black and white birds -Argentines call "Royal" ducks, and we "Muscovy" ducks, though with us -they are uninteresting inhabitants of a {266} farm-yard. Ducks, -ducks everywhere! As these confiding fowl never thought of flying -away, but kept circling over the lagoon again and again, I am sure -that anyone, given sufficient cartridges, and the inclination to do -so, could easily have killed five hundred of them to his own gun in -one day. We limited ourselves to ten apiece. Splashing about in the -lagoon, it was easy to pick up the dead birds without a dog, but no -one who has not carried them can have any idea of the weight of eight -ducks in a gamebag pressing on one's back, or can conceive how -difficult it is to get into the saddle on a half-broken horse with -this weight dragging you backwards. In any other country but the -Argentine, to canter home six miles dripping wet would have resulted -in a severe chill. No one ever seemed the worse for it out there. - -At times I went into the lagoons without a gun, just to observe at -close quarters the teeming water-life there. The raucous screams of -the vigilant "téro-téros" warned the water-birds of a hostile -approach, but it was easy to sit down in the shallow warm water -amongst the reeds until the alarm had died down, and one was amply -repaid for it, though the enforced lengthy abstention from tobacco -was trying. - -The "Camp" is a great educator. One learnt there to recap empty -cartridge-cases with a machine, and to reload them. One learnt too -to clean guns and saddlery. When a thing remains undone, unless you -take it in hand yourself, you begin wondering {267} why you should -ever have left these things to be done for you by others. The novice -finds out that a bridle and bit are surprisingly difficult objects to -clean, even given unlimited oil and sandpaper. The "Camp" certainly -educates, and teaches the neophyte independence. - -I shot several pink spoonbills, one of which in a glass case is not -far from me as I write, but I simply longed to get a scarlet -flamingo. Owing to the spoonbills' habit of flitting from lagoon to -lagoon, they are not difficult to shoot, but a flamingo is a very -wary bird. Perched on one leg, they stand in the very middle of a -lagoon, and allow no one within gunshot. The officious "téro-téros" -effectually notify them of the approach of man, and possibly the -flamingoes have learnt from "Alice in Wonderland" that the Queen of -Hearts is in the habit of utilising them as croquet-mallets. The -natural anxiety to escape so ignominious a fate would tend to make -them additionally cautious. Anyhow, I found it impossible to -approach them. The idea occurred to me of trying to shoot one with a -rifle. So I crawled prostrate on my anatomy up to the lagoon. I -failed at least six times, but finally succeeded in killing a -flamingo. Wading into the lagoon, I triumphantly retrieved my -scarlet victim, and took him by train to Buenos Ayres, intending to -hand him over to a taxidermist next day. When I awoke next morning, -the blue satin bower in which I slept (originally fitted up, as I -have explained, as the bedroom of a minor light of {268} the operatic -stage) was filled with a pestilential smell of decayed fish. I -inquired the reason of my English servant, who informed me that the -cook was afraid that there was something wrong about "the queer duck" -I had brought home last night, as its odour was not agreeable. (The -real expression he used was "smelling something cruel.") Full of -horrible forebodings, I jumped out of bed and ran down to the -kitchen, to find a little heap of brilliant scarlet feathers reposing -on the table, and Paquita, our fat Andalusian cook, regarding with -doubtful eyes a carcase slowly roasting before the fire, and filling -the place with unbelievably poisonous effluvia. And that was the end -of the only flamingo I ever succeeded in shooting. - -A London financial house had, by foreclosing a mortgage, come into -possession of a great tract of land in the unsurveyed and uncharted -Indian Reserve, the Gran Chaco. Anxious to ascertain whether their -newly-acquired property was suited for white settlers, the financial -house sent out two representatives to Buenos Ayres with orders to fit -out a little expedition to survey and explore it. I was invited to -join this expedition, and as work was slack at the time, Sir Edward -did not require my services and gave me leave to go. I had been -warned that conditions would be very rough indeed, but the -opportunity seemed one of those that only occur once in a lifetime, -and too good to be lost. I do not think the invitation was quite a -disinterested one. The leaders of the expedition probably {269} -thought that the presence of a member of the British Legation might -be useful in case of difficulties with the Argentine authorities. I -travelled by steamer six hundred miles up the mighty Paraná, and -joined the other members of the expedition at the Alexandra Colony, a -little English settlement belonging to the London firm hundreds of -miles from anywhere, and surrounded by vast swamps. The Alexandra -Colony was a most prosperous little community, but was unfortunately -infested with snakes and every imaginable noxious stinging insect. -As we should have to cross deep swamps perpetually, we took no wagons -with us, but our baggage was loaded on pack-horses. For provisions -we took jerked sun-dried beef (very similar to the South African -"biltong"), hard biscuit, flour, coffee, sugar, and salt, as well as -several bottles of rum, guns, rifles, plenty of ammunition, and two -blankets apiece. We had some thirty horses in all; the loose horses -trotting obediently behind a bell-mare, according to their convenient -Argentine custom. In Argentina mares are never ridden, and a -bell-mare serves the same purpose in keeping the "tropilla" of horses -together as does a bellwether in keeping sheep together with us. At -night only the bell-mare need be securely picketed; the horses will -not stray far from the sound of her tinkling bell. Should the -bell-mare break loose, there is the very devil to pay; all the others -will follow her. It will thus be seen that the bell-mare plays a -very important part. In French families the {270} _belle-mère_ fills -an equally important position. We were four Englishmen in all; the -two leaders, the doctor, and myself. The doctor was quite a -youngster, taking a final outing before settling down to serious -practice in Bristol. A nice, cheery youth! The first night I -discovered how very hard the ground is to sleep upon, but our -troubles did not begin till the second day. We were close up to the -tropics, and got into great swamps where millions and millions of -mosquitoes attacked us day and night, giving us no rest. Our hands -got so swollen with bites that we could hardly hold our reins, and -sleep outside our blankets was impossible with these humming, buzzing -tormentors devouring us. If one attempted to baffle them by putting -one's head under the blanket, the stifling heat made sleep equally -difficult. In four days we reached a waterless land; that is to say, -there were clear streams in abundance, but they were all of salt, -bitter, alkaline water, undrinkable by man or beast. Oddly enough, -all the clear streams were of bitter water, whereas the few muddy -ones were of excellent drinking water. I think these alkaline -streams are peculiar to the interior of South America. Our horses -suffered terribly; so did we. We had three Argentine gauchos with -us, to look after the horses and baggage, besides two pure Indians. -One of these Indians, known by the pretty name of Chinche, or "The -Bug," could usually find water-holes by watching the flight of the -birds. The water in these holes was often black and fetid, {271} yet -we drank it greedily. Chinche could also get a little water out of -some kinds of aloes by cutting the heart out of the plant. In the -resulting cavity about half a glassful of water, very bitter to the -taste, but acceptable all the same, collected in time. Prolonged -thirst under a hot sun is very difficult to bear. We nearly murdered -the doctor, for he insisted on recalling the memories of great cool -tankards of shandy-gaff in Thames-side hostelries, and at our worst -times of drought had a maddening trick of imitating (exceedingly well -too) the tinkling of ice against the sides of a long tumbler. - -In spite of thirst and the accursed mosquitoes it was an interesting -trip. We were where few, if any, white men had been before us; the -scenery was pretty; and game was very plentiful. The open rolling, -down-like country, with its little copses and single trees, was like -a gigantic edition of some English park in the southern counties. In -the early morning certain trees, belonging to the cactus family, I -imagine, were covered with brilliant clusters of flowers, crimson, -pink, and white. As the sun increased in heat all these flowers -closed up like sea anemones, to reopen again after sunset. The place -crawled with deer, and so tame and unsophisticated were they that it -seemed cruel to take advantage of them and to shoot them. We had to -do so for food, for we lived almost entirely on venison, and venison -is a meat I absolutely detest. When food is unpalatable, one is -surprised to find how very little is necessary to sustain life; an -{272} experience most of us have repeated during these last two -years, not entirely voluntarily. Chinche, the Indian, could see the -tracks of any beasts in the dew at dawn, where my eyes could detect -nothing whatever. In this way I was enabled to shoot a fine jaguar, -whose skin has reposed for thirty years in my dining-room. One -night, too, an ant-eater blundered into our camp, and by some -extraordinary fluke I shot him in the dark. His skin now keeps his -compatriot company. An ant-eating bear is a very shy and wary -animal, and as he is nocturnal in his habits, he is but rarely met -with, so this was a wonderful bit of luck. We encountered large -herds of peccaries, the South American wild boar. These little -beasts are very fierce and extremely pugnacious, and the horses -seemed frightened of them. The flesh of the peccary is excellent and -formed a most welcome variation to the eternal venison. I never -could learn to shoot from the saddle as Argentines do, but had to -slip off my horse to fire. I was told afterwards that it was very -dangerous to do this with these savage little peccaries. - -There are always compensations to be found everywhere. Had not the -abominable mosquitoes prevented sleep, one would not have gazed up -for hours at the glorious constellations of the Southern sky, -including that arch-impostor the Southern Cross, glittering in the -dark-blue bowl of the clear tropical night sky. Had we not suffered -so from thirst, we should have appreciated less the unlimited {273} -foaming beer we found awaiting us on our return to the Alexandra -Colony. By the way, all South Americans believe firmly in -moon-strokes, and will never let the moon's rays fall on their faces -whilst sleeping. - -I judged the country we traversed quite unfitted for white settlers, -owing to the lack of good water, and the evil-smelling swamps that -cut the land up so. That exploring trip was doubtless pleasanter in -retrospect than in actual experience. I would not have missed it, -though, for anything, for it gave one an idea of stern realities. - -On returning to the Alexandra Colony, both I and the doctor, a -remarkably fair-skinned young man, found, after copious ablutions, -that our faces and hands had been burnt so black by the sun that we -could easily have taken our places with the now defunct Moore and -Burgess minstrels in the vanished St. James's Hall in Piccadilly -without having to use any burnt-cork whatever. - -On the evening of our arrival at Alexandra, I was reading in the -sitting-room in an armchair against the wall. The doctor called out -to me to keep perfectly still, and not to move on any account until -he returned. He came back with a pickle-jar and a bottle. I smelt -the unmistakable odour of chloroform, and next minute the doctor -triumphantly exhibited an immense tarantula spider in the pickle-jar. -He had cleverly chloroformed the venomous insect within half an inch -of my head, otherwise I should certainly have been bitten. The {274} -bite of these great spiders, though not necessarily fatal, is -intensely painful. - -The doctor had brought out with him a complete anti-snake-bite -equipment, and was always longing for an occasion to use it. He was -constantly imploring us to go and get bitten by some highly venomous -snake, in order to give him an opportunity of testing the efficacy of -his drugs, hypodermic syringes, and lancets. At Alexandra a dog did -get bitten by a dangerous snake, and was at once brought to the -doctor, who injected his snake-bite antidote, with the result that -the dog died on the spot. - -A river ran through Alexandra which was simply alive with fish, also -with alligators. In the upper reaches of the Paraná and its -tributaries, bathing is dangerous not only because of the alligators, -but on account of an abominable little biting-fish. These -biting-fish, which go about in shoals, are not unlike a flounder in -appearance and size. They have very sharp teeth and attack -voraciously everything that ventures into the water. In that climate -their bites are very liable to bring on lockjaw. The doctor and I -spent most of our time along this river with fishing lines and -rifles, for alligators had still the charm of novelty to us both, and -we both delighted in shooting these revolting saurians. I advise no -one to try to skin a dead alligator. There are thousands of sinews -to be cut through, and the pestilential smell of the brute would -sicken a Chinaman. We caught some extraordinary-looking {275} fish -on hand lines, including a great golden carp of over 50 lb. ("dorado" -in Spanish). It took us nearly an hour to land this big fellow, who -proved truly excellent when cooked. - -When I first reached the Argentine, travel was complicated by the -fact that each province issued its own notes, which were only current -within the province itself except at a heavy discount. The value of -the dollar fluctuated enormously in the different provinces. In -Buenos Ayres the dollar was depreciated to four cents, or twopence, -and was treated as such, the ordinary tram fare being one depreciated -dollar. In other provinces the dollar stood as high as three -shillings. In passing from one province to another all paper money -had to be changed, and this entailed the most intricate calculations. -It is unnecessary to add that the stranger was fleeced quite -mercilessly. The currency has since been placed on a more rational -basis. National notes, issued against a gold reserve, have -superseded the provincial currency, and pass from one end of the -Republic to the other. - -Upon returning to Buenos Ayres, my blue-satin bedroom looked -strangely artificial and effeminate, after sleeping on the ground -under the stars for so long. - - - - -{276} - -CHAPTER IX - -Paraguay--Journey up the river--A primitive Capital--Dick the -Australian--His polychrome garb--A Paraguayan Race Meeting--Beautiful -figures of native women--The "Falcon" adventurers--a quaint -railway--Patiño Cué--An extraordinary household--The capable -Australian boy--Wild life in the swamps--"Bushed"--A literary -evening--A railway record--The Tigre midnight -swims--Canada--Maddening flies--A grand salmon river--The Canadian -backwoods--Skunks and bears--Different views as to industrial -progress. - - -As negotiations had commenced in the "'eighties" for a new Treaty, -including an Extradition clause, between the British and Paraguayan -Governments, several minor points connected with it required clearing -up. - -I accordingly went up the river to Asuncion, the Paraguayan capital, -five days distant from Buenos Ayres by steamer. A short account of -that primitive little inland Republic in the days before it was -linked up with Argentina by railway may prove of interest, for it was -unlike anything else, with its stately two hundred-year-old relics of -the old Spanish civilisation mixed up with the roughest of modern -makeshifts. The vast majority of the people were Guaranis, of pure -Indian blood and speech. The little State was so isolated from the -rest of the world that the nineteenth century {277} had touched it -very lightly. Since its independence Paraguay had suffered under the -rule of a succession of Dictator Presidents, the worst of whom was -Francisco Lopez, usually known as Tyrant Lopez. This ignorant savage -aspired to be the Napoleon of South America, and in 1864 declared war -simultaneously on Brazil, Uruguay, and the Argentine Republic. The -war continued till 1870, when, fortunately, Lopez was killed, but the -population of Paraguay had diminished from one and a quarter million -to four hundred thousand people, nearly all the males being killed. -In my time there were seven women to every male of the population. - -The journey up the mighty Paraná is very uninteresting, for these -huge rivers are too broad for the details on either shore to be seen -clearly. After the steamer had turned up the Paraguay river on the -verge of the tropics, it became less monotonous. The last Argentine -town is Formosa, a little place of thatched shanties clustered under -groves of palms. We arrived there at night, and remained three -hours. I shall never forget the eerie, uncanny effect of seeing for -the first time Paraguayan women, with a white petticoat, and a white -sheet over their heads as their sole garments, flitting noiselessly -along on bare feet under the palms in the brilliant moonlight. They -looked like hooded silent ghosts, and reminded me irresistibly of the -fourth act of "Robert le Diable," when the ghosts of the nuns arise -out of their cloister graves at Bertram's command. They did not -though as {278} in the opera, break into a glittering ballet. - -On board the steamer there was a young globe-trotting Australian. He -was a nice, cheery lad, and, like most Australians, absolutely -natural and unaffected. As he spoke no Spanish, he was rather at a -loose end, and we agreed to foregather. - -Asuncion was really a curiosity in the way of capitals. Lopez the -Tyrant suffered from megalomania, as others rulers have done since -his day. He began to construct many imposing buildings, but finished -none of them. He had built a huge palace on the model of the -Tuileries on a bluff over the river. It looked very imposing, but -had no roof and no inside. He had also begun a great mausoleum for -members of the Lopez family, but that again had only a façade, and -was already crumbling to ruin. The rest of the town consisted -principally of mud and bamboo shanties, thatched with palm. The -streets were unpaved, and in the main street a strong spring gushed -up. Everyone rode; there was but one wheeled vehicle in Asuncion, -and that was only used for weddings and funerals. The inhabitants -spoke of their one carriage as we should speak of something -absolutely unique of its kind, say the statue of the Venus de Milo, -or of some rare curiosity, such as a great auk's egg, or a twopenny -blue Mauritius postage stamp, or a real live specimen of the dodo. - -Nothing could be rougher than the accommodation Howard, the young -Australian, and I found at the hotel. We were shown into a very -dirty brick-paved {279} room containing eight beds. We washed -unabashed at the fountain in the _patio_, as there were no other -facilities for ablutions at all, and the bare-footed, shirtless -waiter addressed us each by our Christian names _tout court_, at -once, omitting the customary "Don." The Spanish forms of Christian -names are more melodious than ours, and Howard failed to recognize -his homely name of "Dick" in "Ricardo." - -As South American men become moustached and bearded very early in -life, I think that our clean-shaved faces, to which they were not -accustomed, led the people to imagine us both much younger than we -really were, for I was then twenty-seven, and the long-legged Dick -was twenty-one. Never have I known anyone laugh so much as that -light-hearted Australian boy. He was such a happy, merry, careless -creature, brimful of sheer joy at being alive, and if he had never -cultivated his brains much, he atoned for it by being able to do -anything he liked with his hands and feet. He could mend and repair -anything, from a gun to a fence; he could cook, and use a needle and -thread as skilfully as he could a stock-whip. I took a great liking -to this lean, sun-browned, pleasant-faced lad with the merry laugh -and the perfectly natural manner; we got on together as though we had -known each other all our lives, in fact we were addressing one -another by our Christian names on the third day of our acquaintance. - -Dick was a most ardent cricketer, and his {280} baggage seemed to -consist principally of a large and varied assortment of blazers of -various Australian athletic clubs. He insisted on wearing one of -these, a quiet little affair of mauve, blue, and pink stripes, and -our first stroll through Asuncion became a sort of triumphal -progress. The inhabitants flocked out of their houses, loud in their -admiration of the "Gringo's" (all foreigners are "Gringos" in South -America) tasteful raiment. So much so that I began to grow jealous, -and returning to the hotel, I borrowed another of Howard's blazers -(if my memory serves me right, that of the "Wonga-Wonga Wallabies"), -an artistic little garment of magenta, orange, and green stripes. We -then sauntered about Asuncion, arm-in-arm, to the delirious joy of -the populace. We soon had half the town at our heels, enthusiastic -over these walking rainbows from the mysterious lands outside -Paraguay. These people were as inquisitive as children, and plied us -with perpetual questions. Since Howard could not speak Spanish, all -the burden of conversation fell on me. As I occupied an official -position, albeit a modest one, I thought it best to sink my identity, -and became temporarily a citizen of the United States, Mr. Dwight P. -Curtis, of Hicksville, Pa., and I gave my hearers the most glowing -and rose-coloured accounts of the enterprise and nascent industries -of this progressive but, I fear, wholly imaginary spot. I can only -trust that no Paraguayan left his native land to seek his fortune in -Hicksville, Pa., for he might {281} have had to search the State of -Pennsylvania for some time before finding it. - -I have already recounted, earlier in these reminiscences, how the -Paraguayan Minister for Foreign Affairs received me, and that his -Excellency on that occasion dispensed not only with shoes and -stockings, but with a shirt as well. He was, however, like most -people in Spanish-speaking lands, courtesy itself. - -Dick Howard having heard that there was some races in a country town -six miles away, was, like a true Australian, wild to go to them. -Encouraged by our phenomenal success of the previous day, we arrayed -ourselves in two new Australian blazers, and rode out to the races, -Howard imploring me all the way to use my influence to let him have a -mount there. - -The races were very peculiar. The course was short, only about three -furlongs, and perfectly straight. Only two horses ran at once, so -the races were virtually a succession of "heats," but the excitement -and betting were tremendous. The jockeys were little Indian boys, -and their "colours" consisted of red, blue, or green bathing drawers. -Otherwise they were stark naked, and, of course, bare-legged. The -jockey's principal preoccupation seemed to be either to kick the -opposing jockey in the face, or to crack him over the head with the -heavy butts of their raw-hide whips. Howard still wanted to ride. I -pointed out to him the impossibility of exhibiting to the public -{282} his six feet of lean young Australian in nothing but a pair of -green bathing drawers. He answered that if he could only get a mount -he would be quite willing to dispense with the drawers even. Howard -also had a few remarks to offer about the Melbourne Cup, and -Flemington Racecourse, and was not wholly complimentary to this -Paraguayan country meeting. The ladies present were nearly all -bare-foot, and clad in the invariable white petticoat and sheet. It -was not in the least like the Royal enclosure at Ascot, yet they had -far more on, and appeared more becomingly dressed than many of the -ladies parading in that sacrosanct spot in this year of grace 1919. -Every single woman, and every child, even infants of the tenderest -age, had a green Paraguayan cigar in their mouths. - -These Paraguayan women were as beautifully built as classical -statues; with exquisitely moulded little hands and feet. Their -"attaches," as the French term the wrist and ankles, were equally -delicately formed. They were "tea with plenty of milk in it" colour, -and though their faces were not pretty, they moved with such graceful -dignity that the general impression they left was a very pleasing one. - -Our blazers aroused rapturous enthusiasm. I am sure that the members -of the "St. Kilda Wanderers" would have forgiven me for masquerading -in their colours, could they have witnessed the terrific success I -achieved in my tasteful, if brilliant, borrowed plumage. - -{283} - -Asuncion pleased me. This quaint little capital, stranded in its -backwater in the very heart of the South American Continent, was so -remote from all the interests and movements of the modern world. The -big three-hundred-year cathedral bore the unmistakable dignified -stamp of the old Spanish "Conquistadores." It contained an -altar-piece of solid silver reaching from floor to roof. How Lopez -must have longed to melt that altar-piece down for his own use! -Round the cathedral were some old houses with verandahs supported on -palm trunks, beautifully carved in native patterns by Indians under -the direction of the Jesuits. The Jesuits had also originally -introduced the orange tree into Paraguay, where it had run wild all -over the country, producing delicious fruit, which for some reason -was often green, instead of being of the familiar golden colour. - -Everyone envies what they do not possess. On the Continent cafés are -sometimes decorated with pictures of palms and luxuriant tropical -vegetation, in order to give people of the frozen North an illusion -of warmth. - -In steaming Asuncion, on the other hand, the fashionable café was -named, "The North Pole." Here an imaginative Italian artist with a -deficient sense of perspective and curious ideas of colour had -decorated the walls with pictures of icebergs, snow, and Polar bears, -thus affording the inhabitants of this stew-pan of a town a delicious -sense of arctic coolness. The "North Pole" was the {284} only place -in Paraguay where ice and iced drinks were to be procured. - -Being the height of the summer, the heat was almost unbearable, and -bathing in the river was risky on account of those hateful -biting-fish. There was a spot two miles away, however, where a -stream had been brought to the edge of the cliff overhanging the -river, down which it dropped in a feathery cascade, forming a large -pool below it. Howard and I rode out every morning there to bathe -and luxuriate in the cool water. The river made a great bend here, -forming a bay half a mile wide. This bay was literally choked with -_Victoria regia_, the giant water-lily, with leaves as big as -tea-trays, and great pink flowers the size of cabbages. The lilies -were in full bloom then, quite half a mile of them, and they were -really a splendid sight. I seem somehow in this description of the -_Victoria regia_ to have been plagiarising the immortal Mrs. O'Dowd, -of "Vanity Fair," in her account of the glories of the hot-houses at -her "fawther's" seat of Glenmalony. - -Few people now remember a fascinating book of the "'eighties," "The -Cruise of the Falcon," recounting how six amateurs sailed a -twenty-ton yacht from Southampton to Asuncion in Paraguay. Three of -her crew got so bitten with Paraguay that they determined to remain -there. We met one of these adventurers by chance in Asuncion, -Captain Jardine, late of the P. and O. service, an elderly man. He -invited us to visit them at {285} Patiño Cué, the place where they -had settled down, some twenty-five miles from the capital, though he -warned us that we should find things extremely rough there, and that -there was not one single stick of furniture in the house. He asked -us to bring out our own hammocks and blankets, as well as our guns -and saddles, the saddle being in my time an invariable item of a -traveller's baggage. - -Dick and I accordingly bought grass-plaited hammocks and blankets, -and started two days later, "humping our swags," as the Australian -picturesquely expressed the act of carrying our own possessions. -That colour-loving youth had donned a different blazer, probably that -of the "Coolgardie Cockatoos." It would have put Joseph's coat of -many colours completely in the shade any day of the week, and -attracted a great deal of flattering attention. - -The ambitious Lopez had insisted on having a railway in his State, to -show how progressive he was, so a railway was built. It ran sixty -miles from Asuncion to nowhere in particular, and no one ever wanted -to travel by it; still it was unquestionably a railway. To give a -finishing touch to this, Lopez had constructed a railway station big -enough to accommodate the traffic of Paddington. It was, of course, -not finished, but was quite large enough for its one train a day. -The completed portion was imposing with columns and statues, the rest -tailed off to nothing. Here, to our amazement, we found a train -composed of {286} English rolling-stock, with an ancient engine built -in Manchester, and, more wonderful to say, with an Englishman as -engine-driver. The engine not having been designed for burning wood, -the fire-box was too small, and the driver found it difficult to keep -up steam with wood, as we found out during our journey. We travelled -in a real English first-class carriage of immense antiquity, blue -cloth and all. So decrepit was it that when the speed of the train -exceeded five miles an hour (which was but seldom) the roof and sides -parted company, and gaped inches apart. We seldom got up the -gradients at the first or second try, but of course allowances must -be made for a Paraguayan railway. Lopez had built Patiño Cué, for -which we were bound, as a country-house for himself. He had not, of -course, finished it, but had insisted on his new railway running -within a quarter of a mile of his house, which we found very -convenient. - -I could never have imagined such a curious establishment as the one -at Patiño Cué. The large stone house, for which Jardine paid the -huge rent of £5 per annum, was tumbling to ruin. Three rooms only -were fairly water-tight, but these had gaping holes in their roofs -and sides, and the window frames had long since been removed. The -fittings consisted of a few enamelled iron plates and mugs, and of -one tin basin. Packing cases served as seats and tables, and -hammocks were slung on hooks. Captain Jardine did all the cooking -and ran the establishment; his two companions (Howard {287} and I, -for convenience's sake, simply termed them "the wasters") lay smoking -in their hammocks all day, and did nothing whatever. I may add that -"the wasters" supplied the whole financial backing. Jardine wore -native dress, with bare legs and sandals, a poncho round his waist, -and another over his shoulders. A poncho is merely a fringed brown -blanket with hole cut in it for the head to pass through. With his -long grey beard streaming over his flowing garments, Jardine looked -like a neutral-tinted saint in a stained-glass window. It must be a -matter for congratulation that, owing to the very circumstances of -the case, saints in stained-glass windows are seldom called on to -take violent exercise, otherwise their voluminous draperies would -infallibly all fall off at the second step. Jardine was a highly -educated and an interesting man, with a love for books on metaphysics -and other abstruse subjects. He carried a large library about with -him, all of which lay in untidy heaps on the floor. He was -unquestionably more than a little eccentric. The "wasters" did not -count in any way, unless cheques had to be written. The other -members of the establishment were an old Indian woman who smoked -perpetual cigars, and her grandson, a boy known as Lazarus, from a -physical defect which he shared with a Biblical personage, on the -testimony of the latter's sisters--you could have run a drag with -that boy. - -The settlers had started as ranchers; but the {288} "wasters" had -allowed the cattle to break loose and scatter all over the country. -They had been too lazy to collect them, or to repair the broken -fences, so just lay in their hammocks and smoked. There were some -fifty acres of orange groves behind the house. The energetic Jardine -had fenced these in, and, having bought a number of pigs, turned pork -butcher. There was an abundance of fallen fruit for these pigs to -fatten on, and Jardine had built a smoke-house, where he cured his -orange-fed pork, and smoked it with lemon wood. His bacon and hams -were super-excellent, and fetched good prices in Asuncion, where they -were establishing quite a reputation. - -Meanwhile, the "wasters" lay in their hammocks in the verandah and -smoked. Jardine told me that one of them had not undressed or -changed his clothes for six weeks, as it was far too much trouble. -Judging from his appearance, he had not made use of soap and water -either during that period. - -Dick Howard proved a real "handy man." In two days this lengthy, -lean, sunburnt youth had rounded up and driven home the scattered -cattle, and then set to work to mend and repair all the broken -fences. He caught the horses daily, and milked the cows, an art I -was never able myself to acquire, and made tea for himself in a -"billy." - -Patiño Cué was a wonderful site for a house. It stood high up on -rolling open ground, surrounded by intensely green wooded knolls. -The {289} virgin tropical forest extended almost up to the -dilapidated building on one side, whilst in front of it the ground -fell away to a great lake, three miles away. A long range of green -hills rose the other side of the water, and everywhere clear little -brooks gurgled down to the lake. - -I liked the place, in spite of its intense heat, and stayed there -over a fortnight, helping with the cattle, and making myself as -useful as I could in repairing what the "wasters" had allowed to go -to ruin. They reposed meanwhile in their hammocks. - -It was very pretty country, and had the immense advantage of being -free from mosquitoes. As there are disadvantages everywhere, to make -up for this it crawled with snakes. - -Jardine's culinary operations were simplicity itself. He had some -immense earthen jars four feet high, own brothers to those seen on -the stage in "Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves" at pantomime time. -These must have been the identical jars in which the Forty Thieves -concealed themselves, to be smothered with boiling oil by the crafty -Morgiana. By the way, I never could understand until I had seen -fields of growing sesame in India why Ali Baba's brother should have -mistaken the talisman words "Open Sesame" for "Open Barley." The two -grains are very similar in appearance whilst growing, which explains -it. - -Jardine placed a layer of beef at the bottom of his jar. On that he -put a layer of mandioca (the {290} root from which tapioca is -prepared), another layer of his own bacon, and a stratum of green -vegetables. Then more beef, and so on till the jar was half full. -In went a handful of salt, two handfuls of red peppers, and two -gallons of water, and then a wood fire was built round the pot, which -simmered away day and night till all its contents were eaten. The -old Indian woman baked delicious bread from the root of the mandioca -mixed with milk and cheese, and that constituted our entire dietary. -There were no fixed meals. Should you require food, you took a hunch -of mandioca bread and a tin dipper, and went to the big earthen jar -simmering amongst its embers in the yard. Should you wish for soup, -you put the dipper in at the top; if you preferred stew, you pushed -it to the bottom. Nothing could be simpler. As a rough and ready -way of feeding a household it had its advantages, though there was -unquestionably a certain element of monotony about it. - -As a variation from the eternal beef and mandioca, Jardine begged -Dick and myself to shoot him as many snipe as possible, in the swamps -near the big lake. Those swamps were most attractive, and were -simply alive with snipe and every sort of living creature. Dick was -an excellent shot, and we got from five to fifteen couple of snipe -daily. The tree-crowned hillocks in the swamp were the haunts of -macaws, great gaudy, screaming, winged rainbows of green and scarlet, -and orange and blue, like some of Dick's blazers endowed with -feathers {291} and motion. We had neither of us ever seen wild -macaws before, and I am afraid that we shot a good many for the sheer -pleasure of examining these garish parrots at close quarters, though -they are quite uneatable. I shall carry all my life marks on my left -hand where a macaw bit me to the bone. There were great -brilliant-plumaged toucans too, droll freaks of nature, with huge -horny bills nearly as large as their bodies, given them to crack the -nuts on which they feed. They flashed swiftly pink through the air, -but we never succeeded in getting one. Then there were coypus, the -great web-footed South American water-rat, called "nutria" in -Spanish, and much prized for his fur. That marsh was one of the most -interesting places I have ever been in. The old Indian woman warned -us that we should both infallibly die of fever were we to go into the -swamps at nightfall, but though Dick and I were there every evening -for a fortnight, up to our middles in water, we neither of us took -the smallest harm, probably owing to the temporary absence of -mosquitoes. The teeming hidden wild-life of the place appealed to us -both irresistibly. The water-hog, or capincho, is a quaint beast, -peculiar to South America. They are just like gigantic varnished -glossy-black guinea pigs, with the most idiotically stupid expression -on their faces. They are quite defenceless, and are the constant -prey of alligators and jaguars. Consequently they are very timid. -These creatures live in the water all day, but come out in the -evenings {292} to feed on the reeds and water-herbage. By concealing -ourselves amongst the reeds, and keeping perfectly still, we were -able to see these uncouth, shy things emerging from their day -hiding-places and begin browsing on the marsh plants. To see a very -wary animal at close quarters, knowing that he is unconscious of your -presence, is perfectly fascinating. We never attempted to shoot or -hurt these capinchos; the pleasure of seeing the clumsy gambols of -one of the most timid animals living, in its fancied security, was -quite enough. The capincho if caught very young makes a delightful -pet, for he becomes quite tame, and, being an affectionate animal, -trots everywhere after his master, with a sort of idiotic simper on -his face. - -One evening, on our return from the marsh, we were ill-advised enough -to attempt a short cut home through the forest. The swift tropical -night fell as we entered the forest, and in half an hour we were -hopelessly lost, "fairly bushed," as Dick put it. There is a feeling -of complete and utter helplessness in finding oneself on a pitch-dark -night in a virgin tropical forest that is difficult to express in -words. The impenetrable tangles of jungle; the great lianes hanging -from the trees, which trip you up at every step; the masses of thorny -and spiky things that hold you prisoner; and, as regards myself -personally, the knowledge that the forest was full of snakes, all -make one realise that electric-lighted Piccadilly has its distinct -advantages. Dick had the true Australian's indifference to snakes. -He never {293} could understand my openly-avowed terror of these -evil, death-dealing creatures, nor could he explain to himself the -physical repugnance I have to these loathsome reptiles. This -instinctive horror of snakes is, I think, born in some people. It -can hardly be due to atavism, for the episode of the Garden of Eden -is too remote to account of an inherited antipathy to these gliding, -crawling abominations. We settled that we should have to sleep in -the forest till daylight came, though, dripping wet as we both were -from the swamp, it was a fairly direct invitation to malarial fever. -The resourceful Dick got an inspiration, and dragging his -interminable length (he was like Euclid's definition of a straight -line) up a high tree, he took a good look at the familiar stars of -his own Southern hemisphere. Getting his bearings from these, he -also got our direction, and after a little more tree-climbing we -reached our dilapidated temporary home in safety. I fear that I -shall never really conquer my dislike to snakes, sharks, and -earthquakes. - -Jardine was a great and an omnivorous reader. Dick too was very fond -of reading. Like the hero of "Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour" he carried -his own library with him. As in Mr. Sponge's case, it consisted of -one book only, but in the place of being "Mogg's Cab Fares," it was a -guide to the Australian Turf, a sort of Southern Cross "Ruff's -Guide," with a number of pedigrees of Australian horses thrown in. -Dick's great intellectual amusement was learning these pedigrees by -heart. I used {294} to hear them for him, and, having a naturally -retentive memory, could in the "'eighties" have passed a very -creditable examination in the pedigrees of the luminaries of the -Australian Turf. - -Our evenings at Patiño Cué would have amused a spectator, had there -been one. In the tumble-down, untidy apology for a room, Jardine, -seated on a packing-case under the one wall light, was immersed in -his favourite Herbert Spencer; looking, in his flowing ponchos, long -grey beard, and bare legs, like a bespectacled apostle. He always -seemed to me to require an eagle, or a lion or some other apostolic -adjunct, in order to look complete. I, on another packing-case, was -chuckling loudly over "Monsieur et Madame Cardinal," though Paris -seemed remote from Paraguay. Dick, pulling at a green cigar, a -far-off look in his young eyes, was improving his mind by learning -some further pedigrees of Australian horses, at full length on the -floor, where he found more room for his thin, endless legs; whilst -the two "wasters" dozed placidly in their hammocks on the verandah. -The "wasters," I should imagine, attended church but seldom. -Otherwise they ought to have ejaculated "We have left undone those -things which we ought to have done" with immense fervour, for they -never did anything at all. - -"Lotos-eaters" might be a more poetic name than "wasters," for if -ever there was a land "in which it seemed always afternoon," that -land is Paraguay. Could one conceive of the "wasters" displaying -{295} such unwonted energy, it is possible that-- - - "And all at once they sang 'Our island home - Is far beyond the wave; we will no longer roam'." - -They had eaten of the Lotos-fruit abundantly, and in the golden -sunshine of Paraguay, and amidst its waving green palms, they only -wished-- - - "In the hollow Lotos-land to live and lie reclined." - - -I should perhaps add that "cafia," or sugar-cane spirit, is distilled -in large quantities in Paraguay, and that one at least of the -Lotos-eaters took a marked interest in this national product. - -There were some beautiful nooks in the forest, more especially one -deep blue rocky pool into which a foaming cascade pattered through a -thick encircling fringe of wild orange trees. This little hollow was -brimful of loveliness, with the golden balls of the fruit, and the -brilliant purple tangles of some unknown creeper reflected in the -blue pool. Dick and I spent hours there swimming, and basking _puris -naturalibus_ on the rocks, until the whole place was spoilt for me by -a rustling in the grass, as a hateful ochre-coloured creature -wriggled away in sinuous coils from my bare feet. - -I accompanied Jardine once or twice to a little village some five -miles away, where he got the few household stores he required. This -tiny village was a piece of seventeenth-century Spain, dumped bodily -down amid the riotous greenery of Paraguay. Round {296} a tall white -church in the florid Jesuit style, a few beautiful Spanish stone -houses clustered, each with its tangle of tropical garden. There was -not one single modern erection to spoil the place. Here foaming -bowls of chocolate were to be had, and delicious mandioca bread. It -was a picturesque, restful little spot, so utterly unexpected in the -very heart of the South American Continent. I should like to put on -the stage that tall white church tower cutting into the intense blue -of the sky above, with the vivid green of the feathery palms reaching -to its belfry, and the time-worn houses round it peeping out from -thickets of scarlet poinsettias and hibiscus flowers. It would make -a lovely setting for "Cavalleria Rusticana," for instance. - -I never regretted my stay at Patiño Cué. It gave one a glimpse of -life brought down to conditions of bed-rock simplicity, and of types -of character I had never come across before. - -We travelled back to Asuncion on the engine of the train; I seated in -front on the cow-catcher, Dick, his coat off and his shirt-sleeves -rolled back, on the footplate, officiating as amateur fireman. - -This vigorous young Antipodean hurled logs into the fire-box of the -venerable "Vesuvius" as fast as though he were pitching in balls when -practising his bowling at the nets, with the result that the crazy -old engine attained a speed that must have fairly amazed her. When -we stopped at stations, "Vesuvius" had developed such a head of steam -that she nearly blew her safety-valve off, {297} and steam hissed -from twenty places in her leaky joints. One ought never to be -astonished at misplaced affections. I have seen old ladies lavish a -wealth of tenderness on fat, asthmatical, and wholly repellent pugs, -so I ought not to have been surprised at the immense pride the -English driver took in his antique engine. I am bound to say that he -kept her beautifully cleaned and burnished. His face beamed at her -present performance, and he assured me that with a little coaxing he -could knock sixty miles an hour out of "Vesuvius." I fear that this -statement "werged on the poetical," as Mr. Weller senior remarked on -another occasion. I should much like to have known this man's -history, and to have learnt how he had drifted into driving an engine -of this futile, forlorn little Paraguayan railway. I suspect, from -certain expressions he used, that he was a deserter from the Royal -Navy, probably an ex-naval stoker. As Dick had ridden ten miles that -morning to say good-bye to a lady, to whom he imagined himself -devotedly attached, he was still very smart in white polo-breeches, -brown butcher-boots and spurs, an unusual garb for a railway fireman. -For the first time in the memory of the oldest living inhabitant, the -train reached Asuncion an hour before her time. - -The river steamers' cargo in their downstream trip consisted of -cigars, "Yerba mate," and oranges. These last were shipped in bulk, -and I should like a clever artist to have drawn our steamer, with -tons and tons of fruit, golden, {298} lemon-yellow, and green, piled -on her decks. It made a glowing bit of colour. The oranges were the -only things in that steamer that smelt pleasantly. - -I can never understand why "Yerba mate," or Paraguayan tea, has never -become popular in England. It is prepared from the leaves of the -ilex, and is strongly aromatic and very stimulating. I am myself -exceedingly fond of it. Its lack of popularity may be due to the -fact that it cannot be drunk in a cup, but must be sucked from a -gourd through a perforated tube. It can (like most other things) be -bought in London, if you know where to go to. - -At Buenos Ayres I was quite sorry to part with the laughing, lanky -Australian lad who had been such a pleasant travelling companion, and -who seemed able to do anything he liked with his arms and legs. I -expect that he could have done most things with his brains too, had -he ever given them a chance. Howard's great merit was that he took -things as they came, and never grumbled at the discomforts and minor -hardships one must expect in a primitive country like Paraguay. Our -tastes as regards wild things (with the possible exception of snakes) -rather seemed to coincide, and, neither of us being town-bred, we did -not object to rather elementary conditions. - -I will own that I was immensely gratified at receiving an overseas -letter some eight years later from Dick, telling me that he was -married and had a little daughter, and asking {299} me to stand -godfather for his first child. - -My blue satin bedroom looked more ridiculously incongruous than ever -after the conditions to which I had been used at Patiño Cué. - -The River Plate is over twenty miles broad at Buenos Ayres, and it is -not easy to realise that this great expansive is all fresh water. -The "Great Silver River" is, however, very shallow, except in -mid-channel. Some twenty-five miles from the city it forms on its -southern bank a great archipelago of wooded islands interspersed with -hundreds of winding channels, some of them deep enough to carry -ocean-going steamers. This is known as the Tigre, and its shady -tree-lined waterways are a great resort during the sweltering heat of -an Argentine summer. It is the most ideal place for boating, and -boasts a very flourishing English Rowing Club, with a large fleet of -light Thames-built boats. Here during the summer months I took the -roughest of rough bungalows, with two English friends. The -three-roomed shanty was raised on high piles, out of reach of floods, -and looked exactly like the fishermen's houses one sees lining the -rivers in native villages in the Malay States. During the intense -heat of January the great delight of life at the Tigre was the -midnight swim in the river before turning in. The Tigre is too far -south for the alligators, biting-fish, electric rays (I allude to -fish; not to beams of light), or other water-pests which Nature has -lavished on the tropics in order to counteract their irresistible -charm--and to prevent the whole world from {300} settling down there. -The water of the Tigre was so warm that one could remain in it over -an hour. One mental picture I am always able to conjure up, and I -can at will imagine myself at midnight paddling lazily down-stream on -my back through the milk-warm water, in the scented dusk, looking up -at the pattern formed by the leaves of the overhanging trees against -the night sky; a pattern of black lace-work against the polished -silver of the Southern moonlight, whilst the water lapped gently -against the banks, and an immense joy at being alive filled one's -heart. - -I went straight from Buenos Ayres to Canada on a tramp steamer, and a -month after leaving the Plate found myself in the backwoods of the -Province of Quebec, on a short but very famous river running into the -Bay of Chaleurs, probably the finest salmon river in the world, and I -was fortunate enough to hook and to land a 28 lb. salmon before I had -been there one hour. No greater contrast in surroundings can be -imagined. In the place of the dead-flat, treeless levels of Southern -Argentina, there were dense woods of spruce, cedar, and var, climbing -the hills as far as the eye could see. Instead of the superficially -courteous Argentine gaucho, with his air of half-concealed contempt -for the "Gringo," and the ever-ready knife, prepared to leap from his -waist-belt at the slightest provocation, there were the blunt, -outspoken, hearty Canadian canoe-men, all of them lumbermen during -the winter months. The fishing was ideal, and the {301} fish ran -uniformly large and fought like Trojans in the heavy water, but, -unfortunately, every single winged insect on the North American -Continent had arranged for a summer holiday on this same river at the -same time. There they all were in their myriads; black-flies, -sand-flies, and mosquitoes, all enjoying themselves tremendously. By -day one was devoured by black-flies, who drew blood every time they -bit. At nightfall the black-flies very considerately retired to -rest, and the little sand-flies took their place. The mosquitoes -took no rest whatever. These rollicking insects were always ready to -turn night into day, or day into night, indiscriminately, provided -there were some succulent humans to feed on. A net will baffle the -mosquito, but for the sand-flies the only effective remedy was a -"smudge" burning in an iron pail. A "smudge" is a fire of damp fir -bark, which smoulders but does not blaze. It also emits huge volumes -of smoke. We dined every night in an atmosphere denser than a thick -London fog, and the coughing was such that a chance visitor would -have imagined that he had strayed into a sanatorium for tuberculosis. - -Things are done expeditiously in Canada. The ground had been -cleared, the wooden house in which we lived erected, and the rough -track through the forest made, all in eight weeks. - -No one who has not tried it can have any idea of the intense cold of -the water in these short Canadian rivers. Their course is so short, -and they {302} are so overhung with fir trees, that the fierce rays -of a Canadian summer sun hardly touch them, so the water remains -about ten degrees above freezing point. It would have been -impossible to swim our river. Even a short dip of half a minute left -one with gasping breath and chattering teeth. - -I was surprised to find, too, that a Canadian forest is far more -impenetrable than a tropical one. Here, the fallen trees and decay -of countless centuries have formed a thick crust some two or three -feet above the real soil. This moss-grown crust yields to the weight -of a man and lets him through, so walking becomes infinitely -difficult, and practically impossible. To extricate yourself at -every step from three feet of decaying rubbish is very exhausting. -In the tropics, that great forcing-house, this decaying vegetable -matter would have given life to new and exuberant growths; but not so -in Canada, frost-bound for four months of the twelve. Two-foot-wide -tracks had been cut through the forest along the river, and the trees -there were "blazed" (_i.e._, notched, so as to show up white where -the bark had been hacked off), to indicate the direction of the -trails; otherwise it would have been impossible to make one's way -through the _débris_ of a thousand years for more than a few yards. - -I never saw such a wealth of wild fruit as on the banks of this -Canadian stream. Wild strawberries and raspberries grew in such -profusion that a bucketful of each could be filled in half an hour. - -{303} - -There was plenty of animal life too. A certain pretty little black -and white striped beast was quite disagreeably common. This -attractive cat-like little creature was armed with stupendous -offensive powers, as all who have experienced a skunk's unspeakably -disgusting odour will acknowledge. Unless molested, they did not -make use of the terrible possibilities they had at their command. -There were also plenty of wandering black bears. These animals live -for choice on grain and berries, and are not hostile to man without -provocation, but they have enormous strength, and it is a good -working rule to remember that it is unwise ever to vex a bear -unnecessarily, even a mild-tempered black bear. - -Our tumbling, roaring Canadian river cutting its way through rounded, -densely-wooded hills was wonderfully pretty, and one could not but -marvel at the infinitely varied beauty with which Providence has -clothed this world of ours, wherever man has not defaced Nature's -perfect craftsmanship. - -The point of view of the country-bred differs widely from that of the -town dweller in this respect. - -Here is a splendid waterfall, churning itself into whirling cataracts -of foam down the face of a jagged cliff. The townsman cries, "What -tremendous power is running to waste here! Let us harness it -quickly. We will divert the falls into hideous water-pipes, and -bring them to our turbines. We will build a power-house cheaply of -corrugated iron, and in time we shall so develop {304} this sleepy -countryside that no one will recognise it." - -Here is a great forest; a joy to the eyes. "The price of timber is -rising; let us quickly raze it to the ground." - -"Our expert tells us that under this lovely valley there runs a thick -seam of coal. We will sink shafts, and build blatantly hideous towns -and factories, pollute this clear air with smoke and mephitic -vapours, and then fall down and worship the great god Progress. We -will also pocket fat dividends." - -The stupid, unprogressive son of woods and green fields shudders at -such things; the son of asphalte, stuffy streets, tramways, and arc -lights glories in them. - -Like many other things, it all depends on the point of view. - - - - -{305} - -CHAPTER X - -Former colleagues who have risen to -eminence--Kiderlin-Waechter--Aehrenthal--Colonel Klepsch--The -discomfiture of an inquisitive journalist--Origin of certain Russian -scares--Tokyo--Dulness of Geisha dinners--Japanese culinary -curiosities--"Musical Chairs"--Lack of colour in Japan--The Tokugawa -dynasty--Japanese Gardens--The transplanted suburban Embassy -house--Cherry-blossom--Japanese Politeness--An unfortunate incident -in Rome--Eastern courtesy--The country in Japan--An Imperial duck -catching party--An up-to-date Tokyo house--A Shinto -Temple--Linguistic difficulties at a dinner-party--The economical -colleague--Japan defaced by advertisements. - - -Petrograd was the only capital at which I was stationed in which -there was a diplomatic _table d'hôte_. In one of the French -restaurants there, a room was specially set apart for the diplomats, -and here the "chers collègues" foregathered nightly, when they had no -other engagements. When a Spaniard and a Dane, a Roumanian and a -Dutchman, a Hungarian and an Englishman dine together frequently, it -becomes a subject of thankfulness that the universal use of the -French language as a means of international communication has -mitigated the linguistic difficulties brought about by the ambitious -tower-builders of Babel. - -Two men whom I met frequently at that diplomatic _table d'hôte_ rose -afterwards to important {306} positions in their own countries. They -were Baron von Kiderlin-Waechter, the German, and Baron von -Aehrenthal, the Austrian, both of whom became Ministers for Foreign -Affairs in their respective countries, and both of whom are now dead. -Kiderlin-Waechter arrived in Petrograd as quite a young man with the -reputation of being Bismarck's favourite and most promising pupil. -Though a South German by birth, Kiderlin-Waechter had acquired an -overbearing and dictatorial manner of the most approved Prussian -type. When a number of young men, all of whom are on very friendly -terms with each other, constantly meet, there is naturally a good -deal of fun and chaff passed to and fro between them. Diplomats are -no exception to this rule, and the fact that the ten young men -talking together may be of ten different nationalities is no bar to -the interchange of humorous personalities, thanks to the convenient -French language, which lends itself peculiarly to "persiflage." - -Germans can never understand the form of friendly banter which we -term chaff, and always resent it deeply. I have known German -diplomats so offended at a harmless joke that they have threatened to -challenge the author of it to a duel. I should like to pay a belated -tribute to the memory of the late Count Lovendal, Danish Minister in -Petrograd; peace to his ashes! This kindly, tactful, middle-aged man -must during my time in Petrograd have stopped at least eight duels. -People in trouble went straight to Count Lovendal, and this {307} -shrewd, kind-hearted, experienced man of the world heard them with -infinite patience, and then always gave them sound advice. As years -went on, Count Lovendal came to be a sort of recognised Court of -Honour, to whom all knotty and delicate points were referred. He, if -anyone, should have "Blessed are the peacemakers" inscribed on his -tomb. At least four of the duels he averted were due to the -inability of Germans to stand chaff. Kiderlin-Waechter, for -instance, was for ever taking offence at harmless jokes, and -threatening swords and pistols in answer to them. He was a very big, -gross-looking, fair-haired man; with exactly the type of face that a -caricaturist associates with the average Prussian. - -His face was slashed with a generous allowance of the scars of which -Germans are so proud, as testifying to their prowess in their -student-duelling days. I think that it was the late Sir Wilfrid -Lawson who, referring to the beer-drinking habits of German students -and their passionate love of face-slashing, described them as living -in a perpetual atmosphere of "scars and swipes." Though from South -Germany, Kiderlin snapped out his words with true "Preussische -Grobheit" in speaking German. Fortunately, it is impossible to -obtain this bullying effect in the French language. It does not lend -itself to it. I should be guilty of exaggeration were I to say that -Kiderlin-Waechter was wildly adored by his foreign colleagues. He -became Minister for Foreign Affairs of the German {308} Empire, but -made the same mistake as some of his predecessors, notably Count -Herbert Bismarck, had done. They attributed Bismarck's phenomenal -success to his habitual dictatorial, bullying manner. This was -easily copied; they forgot the genius behind the bully, which could -not be copied, and did not realise that Bismarck's tremendous brain -had not fallen to their portion. Kiderlin-Waechter's tenure of -office was a short one; he died very suddenly in 1912. He was a -violent Anglophobe. - -Baron von Aehrenthal was a very different stamp of man. He was of -Semitic origin, and in appearance was a good-looking, tall, slim, -dark young fellow with very pleasing manners. Some people indeed -thought his manners too pleasant, and termed them subservient. I -knew Aehrenthal very well indeed, and liked him, but I never -suspected that under that very quiet exterior there lay the most -intense personal ambition. He became Austro-Hungarian Minister for -Foreign Affairs in 1907, being raised to the rank of Count next year. -This quiet, sleepy-mannered man began embarking on a recklessly bold -foreign policy, and, to the surprise of those who fancied that they -knew him well, exhibited a most domineering spirit. The old Emperor -Francis Joseph's mental powers were failing, and it was Aehrenthal -who persuaded him to put an end to the understanding with Russia -under which the _status quo_ in the Balkan States was guaranteed, and -to astonish Europe in 1908 by proclaiming the annexation of Bosnia -and Herzegovina {309} to the Austrian Empire. This step, owing to -the seething discontent it aroused in Bosnia, led directly to the -catastrophe of Sarajevo on June 28, 1914, and plunged Europe into the -most terrible war of history. Aehrenthal, whether intentionally or -not, played directly into the hands of the Pan-Germanic party, and -succeeded in tying his own country, a pliant vassal, to the -chariot-wheels of Berlin. It was Aehrenthal who brought the -immemorially old Hapsburg Monarchy crashing to the ground and by his -foreign policy caused the proud Austrian Empire to collapse like a -house of cards. He did not live to see the final results of his -work, for he died in 1912. - -Colonel Klepsch, the Austro-Hungarian Military Attaché at Petrograd, -another _habitué_ of the diplomatic _table d'hôte_, was a most -remarkable man. He knew more of the real state of affairs in Russia, -and of the inner workings and intentions of the Russian Government, -than any other foreigner in the country, _and his information was -invariably correct_. Nearly all the foreign Ambassadors consulted -Colonel Klepsch as to the probable trend of affairs in Russia, and at -times he called on them and volunteered pieces of information. It -was well known that his source of intelligence was a feminine one, -and experience had proved that it was always to be relied upon. To -this day I do not know whether this mysterious, taciturn man was at -times used as a convenient mouthpiece by the Russian Government, at -the instigation of a {310} certain person to whom he was devotedly -attached; whether he acted on instructions from his own Ambassador, -or if he took the steps he did on his own initiative. This tall, -red-haired, silent man, with his uncanny knowledge of every detail of -what was happening in the country, will always remain an enigma to me. - -I mentioned earlier in these reminiscences that Lord Dufferin on one -occasion accomplished the difficult feat of turning an English -newspaper correspondent out of his house with the most charming -courtesy. - -After an interval of nearly forty years, I can without indiscretion -say how this came about. The person in question, whom we will call -Mr. Q., was an exceedingly enterprising journalist, the correspondent -of a big London daily. He was also pretty unscrupulous as to the -methods he employed in gathering information. It is quite obviously -the duty of a newspaper correspondent to collect information for his -paper. It is equally clearly the duty of those to whom official -secrets are entrusted to prevent their becoming public property; so -here we have conflicting interests. At times it happens that an -"incident" arises between two Governments apparently trivial in -itself, but capable of being fanned into such a fierce flame by -popular opinion as to make it difficult for either Government to -recede from the position they had originally taken up. The Press -screams loudly on both sides, and every Government shrinks from {311} -incurring the unpopularity which a charge of betraying the national -interests would bring upon it. Experience has shown that in these -cases the difficulties can usually be smoothed down, provided the -whole matter be kept secret, and that neither the public nor the -Press of either of the two countries concerned have an inkling of the -awkward situation that has arisen. An indiscreet or hysterical Press -can blow a tiny spark into a roaring conflagration and work up -popular feeling to fever-pitch. It may surprise people to learn that -barely twenty years ago such a situation arose between our own -country and another European Power (_not_ Germany). Those in charge -of the negotiations on both sides very wisely determined that the -matter should be concealed absolutely from the public and the Press -of both countries, and not one word about it was allowed to leak out. -Otherwise the situation might have been one of extreme gravity, for -it was again one of those cases where neither Government could give -way without being accused of pusillanimity. As it was, the matter -was settled amicably in a week, and to this day very few people know -that this very serious difficulty ever occurred. - -Nearly forty years ago, just such a situation had arisen between us -and the Russian Government; but the Ambassador was convinced that he -could smooth it away provided that the whole thing were kept secret. - -Mr. Q. was a first-rate journalist, and his _flair_ {312} as a -newspaperman told him that _something_ was wrong. From the Russians -he could learn nothing; they were as close as wax; so Mr. Q. turned -his attention to the Chancery of the British Embassy. His methods -were simple. He gained admission to the Chancery on some pretext or -another, and then walking about the room, and talking most volubly, -he cast a roving eye over any papers that might be lying about on the -tables. In all Chanceries a book called the Register is kept in -which every document received or sent out is entered, with, of -course, its date, and a short summary of its contents. It is a large -book, and reposes on its own high desk. Ours stood in a window -overlooking the Neva. Mr. Q. was not troubled with false delicacy. -Under pretence of admiring the view over the river, he attempted to -throw a rapid eye over the Register. A colleague of mine, as a -gentle hint, removed the Register from under Mr. Q.'s very nose, and -locked it up in the archive press. Mr. Q., however, was not -thin-skinned. He came back again and again, till the man became a -positive nuisance. We always cleared away every paper before he was -allowed admittance. I was only twenty-two or twenty-three then, and -I devised a strictly private scheme of my own for Mr. Q.'s -discomfiture. All despatches received from the Foreign Office in -those days were kept folded in packets of ten, with a docket on each, -giving a summary of its contents. I prepared two despatches for Mr. -Q.'s private eye and, after much {313} cogitation, settled that they -should be about Afghanistan, which did not happen to be the -particular point in dispute between the two Governments at that time. -I also decided on a rhyming docket. It struck me as a pleasing -novelty, and I thought the jingle would impress itself on Mr. Q.'s -memory, for he was meant to see this bogus despatch. I took eight -sheets of foolscap, virgin, spotless, unblackened, folded them in the -orthodox fashion, and docketed them in a way I remember to this day. -It ran: first the particular year, then "Foreign Office No. 3527. -Secret and Confidential. Dated March 3. Received March 11." Then -came the rhyming docket, - - "General Kaufman's rumoured plan - To make Abdurrahman Khan - Ruler of Afghanistan." - -Under that I wrote in red ink in a different hand, with a fine pen, - -"_Urgent_. Instructions already acted on. See further instructions -re Afghanistan in No. 3534." - - -I was only twenty-two then, and my sense of responsibility was not -fully developed, or I should not have acted so flightily. It still -strikes me though as an irresistibly attractive baited hook to offer -to an inquisitive newspaperman. I grieve to say that I also wrote a -"fake" decypher of a purely apocryphal code telegram purporting to -have come from London. This was also on the subject of {314} -Afghanistan. It struck me at the time as a perfectly legitimate -thing to do, in order to throw this Paul Pry off the scent, for the -Ambassador had impressed on us all the vital importance of not -disclosing the real matter in dispute. I put these flagrant -forgeries in a drawer of my table and waited. I had not to wait -long. My colleagues having all gone out to luncheon, I was alone in -the Chancery one day, when Mr. Q.'s card was brought in to me. I -kept him waiting until I had cleared every single despatch from the -tables and had locked them up. I also locked up the Register, but -put an eight-year-old one, exactly similar in appearance, in its -place, opening it at a date two days earlier than the actual date, in -order that Mr. Q. might not notice that the page (and "to-morrow's" -page as well) was already filled up, and the bogus despatch and fake -telegram from my drawer were duly laid on the centre table. At -twenty-two I was a smooth-faced youth, in appearance, I believe, much -younger than my real age. Mr. Q. came in. He had the "Well, old -man" style, accompanied by a thump on the back, which I peculiarly -detest. He must have blessed his luck in finding such a simple youth -in sole charge of the Chancery. Mr. Q. pursued his usual tactics. -He talked volubly in a loud voice, walking about the room meanwhile. -The idiotic boy smoked cigarettes, and gaped inanely. Mr. Q. went as -usual to the window where the Register lay in order to admire the -view, and the pudding-brained youth noticed nothing, but lit {315} a -fresh cigarette. That young fool never saw that Mr. Paul Pry read -unblushingly half a column of the eight-year-old Register (How it -must have puzzled him!) under his very eyes. Mr. Q. then went to the -centre table, where he had, of course, noticed the two papers lying, -and proceeded to light a cigar. That cigar must have drawn very -badly, for Mr. Q. had occasion to light it again and again, bending -well over the table as he did so. He kept the unsuspicious youth -engaged in incessant conversation meanwhile. So careless and stupid -a boy ought never to have been left in charge of important documents. -Finally Mr. Q., having gained all the information for which he had -been thirsting so long, left in a jubilant frame of mind, perfectly -unconscious that he had been subjected to the slightest crural -tension. - -When the Councillor of Embassy returned, I made a clean breast of -what I had done, and showed him the bogus despatch and telegram I had -contrived. Quite rightly, I received a very severe reprimand. I was -warned against ever acting in such an irregular fashion again, under -the direst penalties. In extenuation, I pointed out to the -Councillor that the inquisitive Mr. Q. was now convinced that our -difficulty with Russia was over Afghanistan. - -I further added that should anyone be dishonourable enough to come -into the Chancery and deliberately read confidential documents which -he knew were not intended for his eye, I clearly could not {316} be -held responsible for any false impressions he might derive from -reading them. That, I was told sharply, was no excuse for my -conduct. After this "official wigging," the Councillor invited me to -dine with him that night, when we laughed loudly over Mr. Q.'s -discomfiture. That person became at length such a nuisance that "his -name was put on the gate," and he was refused admission to the -Embassy. - -The great London daily which Mr. Q. represented at Petrograd -published some strong articles on the grave menace to the Empire -which a change of rulers in Afghanistan might bring about; coupled -with Cassandra-like wails over the purblind British statesmen who -were wilfully shutting their eyes to this impending danger, as well -as to baneful Russian machinations on our Indian frontier. There -were also some unflattering allusions to Abdurrahman Khan. I, -knowing that the whole story had originated in my own brain, could -not restrain a chuckle whilst perusing these jeremiads. After -reading some particularly violent screed, the Councillor of Embassy -would shake his head at me. "This is more of your work, you wretched -boy!" After an interval of forty years this little episode can be -recounted without harm. - -Talking of newspaper enterprise, many years later, when the Emperor -Alexander III died, the editor of a well-known London evening paper, -a great friend of mine, told me in confidence of a journalistic -"scoop" he was meditating. Alexander III {317} had died at Livadia -in the Crimea, and his body was to make a sort of triumphal progress -through Russia. The editor (he is no longer with us, but when I term -him "Harry" I shall be revealing his identity to the few) was sending -out a Frenchman as special correspondent, armed with a goodly store -of roubles, and instructions to get himself engaged as temporary -assistant to the undertaker in charge of the Emperor's funeral. This -cost, I believe, a considerable sum, but the Frenchman, having -entered on his gruesome duties, was enabled to furnish the London -evening paper with the fullest details of all the funeral ceremonies. - -The reason the younger diplomats foregathered so in Petrograd was -that, as I said before, Petrograd was to all intents and purposes -extra-European. Apart from its charming society, the town, qua town, -offered but few resources. The younger Continental diplomats felt -the entire absence of cafés, of music-halls, and of places of light -entertainment very acutely; so they were thrown on each other's -society. In Far Eastern posts such as Pekin or Tokyo, the diplomats -live entirely amongst themselves. For a European, there are -practically no resources whatever in Tokyo. No one could possibly -wish to frequent a Japanese theatre, or a Japanese restaurant, when -once the novelty had worn off, and even Geisha entertainments are -deadly dull to one who cannot understand a word of the language. Let -us imagine a party of Europeans arriving at some fashionable {318} -Japanese restaurant for a Geisha entertainment. They will, of -course, remove their shoes before proceeding upstairs. I was always -unfortunate enough to find on these occasions one or more holes in my -socks gaping blatantly. In time one learns in Japan to subject one's -socks to a close scrutiny in order to make sure that they are intact, -for everyone must be prepared to remove his shoes at all hours of the -day. We will follow the Europeans up to a room on the upper floor, -tastefully arranged in Japanese fashion, and spotlessly neat and -clean. The temperature in this room in the winter months would be -Arctic, with three or four "fire-pots" containing a few specks of -mildly-glowing charcoal waging a futile contest against the -penetrating cold. - -The room is apparently empty, but from behind the sliding-panels -giggles and titters begin, gradually increasing in volume until the -panels slide back, and a number of self-conscious overdressed -children step into the room, one taking her place beside each guest. -These are "Micos"; little girls being trained as professional -Geishas. The European conception of a Geisha is a totally wrong one. -They are simply entertainers; trained singers, dancers, and -story-tellers. The guests seat themselves clumsily and uncomfortably -on the floor and the dinner begins. Japanese dishes are meant to -please the eye, which is fortunate, for they certainly do not appeal -to the palate. I invariably drew one of the big pots of flowers -which always {319} decorate these places close up to me, and -consigned to its kindly keeping all the delicacies of the Japanese -_cuisine_ which were beyond my assimilative powers, such as slices of -raw fish sprinkled with sugar, and seasoned with salted ginger. The -tiresome little Micos kept up an incessant chatter. Their stories -were doubtless extraordinarily humorous to anyone understanding -Japanese, but were apt to lose their point for those ignorant of the -language. The abortive attempts of the Europeans to eat with -chopsticks afforded endless amusement to these bedizened children; -they shook with laughter at seeing all the food slide away from these -unaccustomed table implements. Not till the dinner was over did the -Geishas proper make their appearance. In Japan the amount of bright -colour in a woman's dress varies in inverse ratio to her moral -rectitude. As our Geishas were all habited in sober mouse-colour, or -dull neutral-blue, I can only infer that they were ladies of the very -highest respectability. They were certainly wonderfully attractive -little people. They were not pretty according to our standards, but -there was a vivacity and a sort of air of dainty grace about them -that were very captivating. Their singing is frankly awful. I have -heard four-footed musicians on the London tiles produce sweeter -sounds, but their dancing is graceful to a degree. Unfortunately, -one of the favourite amusements of these charming and vivacious -little people is to play "Musical Chairs"--without any chairs! They -made all the {320} European men follow them round and round the room -whilst two Geishas thrummed on a sort of guitar. As soon as the -music stopped everyone was expected to sit down with a bang on the -floor, To these little Japs five feet high, the process was easy, and -may have seemed good fun; to a middle-aged gentleman, "vir pietate -gravis," these violent shocks were more than painful, and I failed to -derive the smallest amusement from them. No Japanese dinner would be -complete without copious miniature cups of sake. This rice-spirit is -always drunken hot; it is not disagreeable to the taste, being like -warm sherry with a dash of methylated spirit thrown in, but the -little sake bottles and cups are a joy to the eye. This innately -artistic people delight to lavish loving care in fashioning minute -objects; many English drawing-rooms contain sake bottles in enamel or -porcelain ranged in cabinets as works of art. Their form would be -more familiar to most people than their use. Japanese always seem to -look on a love of colour as showing rather vulgar tastes. The more -refined the individual, the more will he adhere to sober black and -white and neutral tints in his house and personal belongings. The -Emperor's palace in Kyoto is decorated entirely in black and white, -with unpainted, unlacquered woodwork, and no colour anywhere. The -Kyoto palace of the great Tokugawa family, on the other hand, a place -of astounding beauty, blazes with gilding, enamels, and lacquer, as -do all the tombs and temples erected by this dynasty. The Tokugawas -usurped power as {321} Shoguns in 1603, reducing the Mikado to a mere -figure-head as spiritual Ruler, and the Shoguns ruled Japan -absolutely until 1868, when they were overthrown, and Shogun and -Mikado were merged into one under the title of Emperor. I fancy that -the Japanese look upon the polychrome splendour of all the buildings -erected by the Tokugawas as proof that they were very inferior to the -ancient dynasty, who contented themselves with plain buildings -severely decorated in black and white. The lack of colour in Japan -is very noticeable on arriving from untidy, picturesque China. The -beautiful neatness and cleanliness of Japan are very refreshing after -slovenly China, but the endless rows of little brown, unpainted, tidy -houses, looking like so many rabbit hutches, are depressing to a -degree. The perpetual earthquakes are responsible for the low -elevation of these houses and also for their being invariably built -of wood, as is indeed everything else in the country. I was -immensely disappointed at the sight of the first temples I visited in -Japan. The forms were beautiful enough, but they were all of -unpainted wood, without any colour whatever, and looked horribly -neutral-tinted. All the famous temples of Kyoto are of plain, -unpainted, unvarnished wood. The splendid group of temples at Nikko -are the last word in Japanese art. They glow with colour; with -scarlet and black lacquer, gilding, enamels, and bronzes, every -detail finished like jewellers' work with exquisite craftmanship, and -they are amongst the most {322} beautiful things in the world; but -they were all erected by the Tokugawa dynasty, as were the equally -superb temples in the Shiba Park at Tokyo. This family seemed -determined to leave Japan less colourless than they found it; in -their great love for scarlet lacquer they must have been the first -people who thought of painting a town red. - -The same lack of colour is found in the gardens. I had pictured a -Japanese garden as a dream of beauty, so when I was shewn a heap of -stones interspersed with little green shrubs and dwarf trees, without -one single flower, I was naturally disappointed, nor had I sufficient -imagination to picture a streak of whitewash daubed down a rock as a -quivering cascade of foaming water. "Our gardens, sir," said my -host, "are not intended to inspire hilarit .. ee, but rather to -create a gentle melanchol .. ee." As regards myself, his certainly -succeeded in its object. - -A friend of mine, whose gardens, not a hundred miles from London, are -justly famous, takes immense pride in her Japanese garden, as she -fondly imagines it to be. At the time of King George's Coronation -she invited the special Japanese Envoys to luncheon, for the express -purpose of showing them her gardens afterwards. She kept the -Japanese garden to the last as a _bonne-bouche_, half-expecting these -children of the Land of the Rising Sun to burst into happy tears at -this reminder of their distant island home. The special Envoys -thanked her with true Japanese politeness, and loudly {323} expressed -their delight at seeing a real English garden. They added that they -had never even imagined anything like this in Japan, and begged for a -design of it, in order that they might create a real English garden -in their native land on their return home. - -As I have said, no Japanese woman can wear bright colours without -sacrificing her moral reputation, but little girls may wear all the -colours of the rainbow until they are eight years old or so. These -little girls, with their hair cut straight across their forehead, are -very attractive-looking creatures, whereas a Japanese boy, with his -cropped head, round face, and projecting teeth, is the most comically -hideous little object imaginable. These children's appearance is -spoilt by an objectionable superstition which decrees it unlucky to -use a pocket-handkerchief on a child until he, or she, is nine years -old. The result is unspeakably deplorable. - -The interior of our Embassy at Tokyo was rather a surprise. Owing to -the constant earthquakes in Tokyo and Yokohama, all the buildings -have to be of wood. The British Embassy was built in London (I -believe by a very well-known firm in Tottenham Court Road), and was -shipped out to Japan complete down to its last detail. The architect -who designed it unhappily took a glorified suburban villa as his -model. So the Tokyo Embassy house is an enlarged "Belmont," or "The -Cedars," or "Tokyo Towers." Every {324} familiar detail is there; -the tiled hall, the glazed door into the garden, and the heavy -mahogany chimneypieces and overmantels. In the library with its -mahogany book-cases, green morocco chairs, and green plush curtains, -it was difficult to realise that one was not in Hampstead or Upper -Tooting. I always felt that I was quite out of the picture unless I -sallied forth at 9 a.m. with a little black bag in my hand, and -returned at 6 p.m. with some fish in a bass-basket. In spite of -being common-place, the house was undeniably comfortable. Everything -Japanese was rigidly excluded from it. That in far-off lands is very -natural. People do not care to be reminded perpetually of the -distance they are away from home. In Calcutta the Maidan, the local -Hyde Park, has nothing Eastern about it. Except in the Eden Gardens -in one corner of it, where there is a splendid tangle of tropical -vegetation, there is not one single palm tree on the Maidan. The -broad sweeps of turf, clumps of trees, and winding roads make an -excellent imitation of Hyde Park transferred to the banks of the -Hooghly, and this is intentional. There is one spot in particular, -where the tall Gothic spire of St. Paul's Cathedral rises out of a -clump of trees beyond a great tank (it may be pointed out that "tank" -in India does not refer to a clumsy, mobile engine of destruction, -but is the word used for a pool or pond), which might be in -Kensington Gardens but for the temperature. The average Briton likes -to be reminded of his home, and generally manages to carry {325} it -about with him somehow. The Russian Embassy at Tokyo had been built -in the same way in Paris and sent out, and was a perfect reproduction -of a French Louis XV house. The garden of the British Embassy had -one striking feature which I have seen nowhere else; hedges of -clipped camellias, four feet high. When these blossomed in the -spring, they looked like solid walls of pink, crimson, or white -flowers, a really beautiful sight! - -Some former British Minister had planted the public roads round the -Embassy with avenues of the pink-flowering cherry, as a present to -the city of Tokyo. The Japanese affect to look down on the pink -cherry, when compared to their adored white cherry-blossom, I suppose -because there is colour in it. Certainly the acres of white -cherry-blossom in the Uyeno Park at Tokyo are one of the sights of -Japan. In no other country in the world would the railways run -special trains to enable the country-people to see the cherries in -full bloom in this Uyeno Park. The blossom is only supposed to be at -its best for three days. In no other country either would people -flock by hundreds to a temple, as they did at Kyoto, to look at a -locally-famed contrast of red plum-blossom against dark-brown maple -leaves. I liked these Japanese country-people. The scrupulously -neat old peasant women, with their grey hair combed carefully back, -and their rosy faces, were quite attractive. Their intense -ceremonious politeness to each other always amused me. Whole family -parties would continue {326} bowing to each other for ten minutes on -end at railway stations, sucking their breath, and rubbing their -knees. When they had finished, someone would recommence, and the -whole process would have to be gone through again, the children -sucking their breath louder even than their elders. Anybody who has -lived in a warm climate must be familiar with the curious sound of -thousands of frogs croaking at once in a pond or marsh at night-time. -The sound of hundreds of Japanese wooden clogs clattering against the -tiles of a railway platform is exactly like that. In the big -Shimbashi station at Tokyo, as the clogs pattered over the tiles, by -shutting my eyes I could imagine that I was listening to a frogs' -orchestra in some large marsh. - -Excessive politeness brings at times its own penalty. At the -beginning of these reminiscences I have related how I went with a -Special Embassy to Rome in my extreme youth. The day before our -departure from Rome, King Humbert gave a farewell luncheon party at -the Quirinal to the Special British Ambassador and his suite, -including of course myself. At this luncheon a somewhat comical -incident occurred. - -When we took our leave, Queen Margherita, then still radiantly -beautiful, offered her hand first to the Special British Ambassador. -He, a courtly and gallant gentleman of the old school, at once -dropped on one knee, in spite of his age, and kissed the Queen's hand -"in the grand manner." The permanent British Ambassador, the late -Sir Augustus Paget, {327} most courteous and genial of men, followed -his temporary colleague's example, and also dropped on one knee. The -Italian Ministers present could not do less than follow the lead of -the foreigners, or show themselves less courteous than the -_forestieri_, so they too had perforce to drop on one knee whilst -kissing the Queen's hand. A hugely obese Minister, buttoned into the -tightest of frockcoats, approached the Queen. With immense -difficulty he lowered himself on to one knee, and kissed the Royal -hand; but no power on earth seemed equal to raising him to his feet -again. The corpulent Minister grew purple in the face; the most -ominous sounds of the rending of cloth and linen re-echoed through -the room; but still he could not manage to rise. The Queen held out -her hand to assist her husband's adipose adviser to regain his feet, -but he was too dignified, or too polite, to accept it. The rending -of the statesman's most intimate garments became more audible than -ever; the portly Minister seemed on the verge of an attack of -apoplexy. It must be understood that the Queen was standing alone -before the throne, with this unfortunate dignitary kneeling before -her; the remainder of the guests were standing in a semi-circle some -twenty feet away. The Queen's mouth began to twitch ominously, -until, in spite of her self-control, after a few preliminary -splutters of involuntary merriment, she broke down, and absolutely -shook with laughter. Sir Augustus Paget and a Roman Prince came up -and saved the situation by raising, with infinite difficulty, the -unfortunate {328} Italian statesman to his feet. As he resumed a -standing position, a perfect Niagara of oddments of apparel, of tags -and scraps of his most private under-garments, rained upon the floor, -and we all experienced a feeling of intense relief when this capable, -if corpulent, Cabinet Minister was enabled to regain the background -with all his clothing outwardly intact. - -And all this came about from an excess of politeness. The East has -always been the land of flowery compliments, also the land of -hyperbole. I once saw the answer the Viceroy of India had received -from a certain tributary Prince, who had been reprimanded in the -sharpest fashion by the Government of India. The native Prince had -been warned in the bluntest of language that unless he mended his -ways at once he would be forthwith deposed, and another ruler put in -his place. A list of his recent enormities was added, in order to -refresh his memory, and the warning as to the future was again -emphasized. The Prince's answer, addressed direct to the Viceroy, -began as follows: - -"Your Excellency's gracious message has reached me. It was more -precious to the eyes than a casket of rubies; sweeter to the taste -than a honeycomb; more delightful to the ears than the song of ten -thousand nightingales. I spread it out before me, and read it -repeatedly: each time with renewed pleasure." - -Considering the nature of the communication, that native Prince must -have been of a touchingly grateful disposition. - -{329} - -The late Duke of Edinburgh was once presented with an address at Hong -Kong from the Corporation of Chinese Merchants, in which he was told, -amongst other things, that he "was more glorious than a phoenix -sitting in a crimson nest with fourteen golden tails streaming behind -him." Surely a charming flight of fancy! - -True politeness in China demands that you should depreciate -everything of your own and exalt everything belonging to your -correspondent. Thus, should you be asking a friend to dinner, you -would entreat him "to leave for one evening the silver and alabaster -palace in which you habitually dwell, and to condescend to honour the -tumble-down vermin-ridden hovel in which I drag out a wretched -existence. Furthermore, could you forget for one evening the -bird's-nest soup, the delicious sea-slugs, and the plump puppy-dogs -on which you habitually feast, and deign to poke your head into my -swill-trough, and there devour such loathsome garbage as a starving -dog would reject, I shall feel unspeakably honoured." The answer -will probably come in some such form as this: "With rapturous delight -have I learnt that, thanks to your courtesy, I may escape from the -pestilential shanty I inhabit, and pass one unworthy evening in a -glorious palace of crystal and gold in your company. After starving -for months on putrid offal, I shall at length banquet on unimagined -delicacies, etc." Should it be a large dinner-party, it must tax the -host's ingenuity to vary the self-depreciatory epithets sufficiently. - -{330} - -The mention of food reminds me that it is an acute difficulty to the -stranger in Japan, should he wander off the beaten track and away -from European hotels. Japanese use neither bread, butter, nor milk, -and these things, as well as meat, are unprocurable in country -districts. Europeans miss bread terribly, and the Japanese -substitute of cold rice is frankly horrible. Instead of the snowy -piles of smoking-hot, beautifully cooked rice of India, rice in Japan -means a cold, clammy, gelatinous mass, hideously distasteful to a -European interior. That, eggs, and tea like a decoction of hay -constitute the standard menu of a Japanese country inn. I never saw -either a sheep or cow in Japan, as there is no pasture. The -universal bamboo-grass, with its sharp edges, pierces the intestines -of any animal feeding on it, and so is worse than useless as fodder -for cattle or sheep. All milk and butter are imported in a frozen -state from Australia, but do not, of course, penetrate beyond -Europe-fashion hotels, as the people of the country do not care for -them. - -The exquisite neatness of Japanese farm houses, with their black and -white walls, thatched roofs, and trim little bamboo fences and gates, -is a real joy to the eye of one who has grown accustomed to the -slipshod untidy East, or even to the happy-go-lucky methods of the -American Continent. I never remember a Japanese village unequipped -with either electric light or telephones. I really think geographers -must have placed the 180th degree in the wrong place, and that Japs -are really {331} the most Western of Westerns, instead of being the -most Eastern of Easterns. Pretty and attractive as the Japanese -country is, its charm was spoilt for me by the almost total absence -of bird and animal life. There are hardly any wild flowers either, -except deliciously fragrant wild violets. Being in Japan, it is -hardly necessary to say that these violets, instead of being of the -orthodox colour, are bright yellow. They would be in Japan. This -quaint people who only like trees when they are contorted, who love -flowerless gardens, whose grass kills cattle, who have evolved peach, -plum and cherry trees which flower gloriously but never bear any -fruit, would naturally have yellow violets. They are certainly a -wonderfully hardy race. I was at beautiful Nikko in the early spring -when they were building a dam across the Nikko river. The stream has -a tremendous current, and is ice-cold. Men were working at the dam -up to their waists in the icy river, and little boys kept bringing -them baskets of building stones, up to their necks in the swift -current. Both men and boys issued from the river as scarlet as -lobsters from the intense cold, and yet they stood about quite -unconcernedly in their dripping thin cotton clothes in the keen wind. -Had they been Europeans, they would all have died of pneumonia in two -days' time. A race must have great powers of endurance that live in -houses with paper walls without any heating appliances during the -sharp cold of a Japanese winter, and that find thin cotton clothing -sufficient for their wants. - -{332} - -The outlines and pleasing details of those black and white country -dwellings with the graceful curves of their roofs are a relief to the -eye after the endless miles of ugly little brown rabbit hutches of -the towns. At Tokyo the enclosure and park of the Emperor's palace -lay just outside the gates of our Embassy, surrounded by a moat so -broad that it could be almost called a lake. It was curious in the -heart of a town to see this moat covered with innumerable wild duck. -Although I have been in the Imperial palace at Kyoto, I was never -inside the one at Tokyo, so I cannot give any details about it. The -glimpses one obtained from outside of its severe black and white -outlines recalled a European mediæval castle, and had something -strangely familiar about them. I was never fortunate enough either -to be invited to an Imperial duck-catching party, which I would have -given anything to witness. The idea of catching wild duck in -butterfly nets would never occur to anyone but the Japanese. The -place where this quaint amusement was indulged in was an extensive -tract of flat ground intersected by countless reed-fringed little -canals and waterways, much on the lines of a marsh in the Norfolk -Broad district. I saw the Ambassador on his return from a -duck-catching party. With superhuman efforts, and a vast amount of -exercise, he had managed to capture three ducks, and he told me that -he had had to run like a hare to achieve even this modest success. -All the guests were expected to appear in high hats and frock-coats -{333} on these occasions, and I should have dearly loved to see the -Ambassador arrayed in frock-coat and high hat bounding hot-foot over -the marshes, his butterfly net poised aloft, in pursuit of his -quacking quarry. The newspapers informed us the next day that the -Crown Prince had headed the list as usual with a bag of twenty-seven -ducks, and I always believe what I see in print. Really Europeans -start heavily handicapped at this peculiar diversion. I have known -many families in England where the sons of the house are instructed -from a very early age in riding, and in the art of handling a gun and -a trout rod, but even in the most sport-loving British families the -science of catching wild duck in butterfly nets forms but seldom part -of the sporting curriculum of the rising generation. Though the -Imperial family are Shintoists, I expect that the Buddhist horror of -taking animal life is at the bottom of this idea of duck-catching, -for the ducks are, I believe, all set free again after their capture. - -We always heard that the Emperor and his family lived entirely on -rice and fish in the frugal Japanese fashion, and that they never -tasted meat. - -I had the opportunity of seeing a very fine house of sixty rooms, -built in strict Japanese style, and just completed. Count Mitsu is -one of the few very wealthy men in Japan; he can also trace his -pedigree back for three thousand years. He had built this house in -Tokyo, and as it was supposed to be the last word in purity of style -("Itchi-Ban," or "Number One," as the Japanese express it), he very -{334} kindly invited the ambassador and myself to go all over it with -him. We had, of course, to remove our shoes on entering, and my -pleasure was somewhat marred by the discovery of a large hole in one -sock, on which I fancied the gaze of the entire Mitsu family was -riveted. Nothing can equal the high-bred courtesy and politeness of -Japanese of really ancient lineage. Countess Mitsu, of a family as -old as her husband's, had a type of face which we do not usually -associate with Japan, and is only found in ladies of the Imperial -family and some others equally old. In place of the large head, full -cheeks, and flat features of the ordinary Japanese woman, Countess -Mitsu and her daughters had thin faces with high aquiline features, -giving them an extraordinarily high-bred and distinguished -appearance. This great house consisted of a vast number of perfectly -empty rooms, destitute of one single scrap of furniture. There was -fine matting on the floor, a niche with one kakemono hanging in it, -one bronze or other work of art, and a vase with one single flower, -and nothing else whatever. The Mitsus being a very high caste -family, there was no colour anywhere. The decoration was confined to -black and white and beautifully-finished, unpainted, unvarnished -woodwork, except for the exquisitely chased bronze door-grips -(door-handles would be an incorrect term for these grips to open and -close the sliding panels). I must confess that I never saw a more -supremely uncomfortable-looking dwelling in my life. The children's -nurseries upstairs {335} were a real joy. The panels had been -painted by a Japanese artist with everything calculated to amuse a -child. There were pictures of pink and blue rabbits, purple frogs, -scarlet porcupines, and grass-green guinea-pigs, all with the most -comical expressions imaginable on their faces. The lamps were of -fish-skin shaped over thin strips of bamboo into the form of the -living fish, then highly coloured, and fitted with electric globes -inside them; weird, luminous marine monsters! Each child had a -little Chinese dressing-table of mother-of-pearl eighteen inches -high, and a tub of real Chinese "powder-blue" porcelain as a bath. -The windows looked on to a fascinating dwarf garden ten feet square, -with real waterfalls, tiny rivers of real water, miniature mountains -and dwarf trees, all in perfect proportion. It was like looking at -an extensive landscape through the wrong end of a telescope. - -The polite infants who inhabited this child's paradise received us -with immense courtesy, lying at full length on the floor on their -little tummies, and wagging their little heads in salutation, till I -really thought they would come off. - -The most interesting thing in Count Mitsu's house was a beautiful -little Shinto temple of bronze-gold lacquer, where all the names of -his many ancestors were inscribed on gilt tablets. Here he and all -his sons (women take no part in ancestor worship) came nightly, and -made a full confession before the tablets of their ancestors of all -they had done during the day; craving for pardon should {336} they -have acted in a fashion unworthy of their family and of Japan. The -Count and his sons then lighted the little red lamps before the -tablets of their forebears to show that they were not forgotten, and -placed the exquisitely carved little ivory "ghost-ship" two inches -long in its place, should any of their ancestors wish to return that -night from the Land of Spirits to their old home. - -The underlying idea of undying family affection is rather a beautiful -one. - -That same evening I went to a very interesting dinner-party at the -house of Prince Arisugawa, a son-in-law of the Emperor's. Both the -dinner and the house were on European lines, but the main point of -interest was that it was a gathering of all the Generals and Admirals -who had taken a prominent part in the Russo-Japanese war. I was -placed between an Admiral and a General, but found it difficult to -communicate with them, Japanese being conspicuously bad linguists. -The General could speak a little fairly unintelligible German; the -Admiral could stutter a very little Russian. It was a pity that the -roads of communication were so blocked for us, for I shall probably -never again sit between two men who had had such thrilling -experiences. I cursed the builders of the Tower of Babel for -erecting this linguistic barrier between us. - -I found that I was a full head taller than all the Japanese in the -room. Princess Arisugawa appeared later. This tiny, dainty, -graceful little lady {337} had the same strongly aquiline type of -features as Countess Mitsu, and the same high-bred look of -distinction. She was beautifully dressed in European style, and had -Rue de la Paix written all over her clothes and her jewels. I have -seldom seen anyone with such taking graceful dignity as this daughter -of the Imperial house, in spite of her diminutive stature. - -The old families in Japan have a pretty custom of presenting every -European guest with a little black-and-gold lacquer box, two inches -high, full of sweetmeats, of the sort we called in my youth "hundreds -and thousands." These little boxes bear on their tops in gold -lacquer the badge or crest of the family, thus serving as permanent -souvenirs. - -In a small community such as the European diplomats formed at Tokyo, -the peculiarities and foibles of the "chers collègues" formed -naturally an unending topic of conversation. There was one foreign -representative who was determined to avoid bankruptcy, could the most -rigorously careful regulation of his expenditure avert such a -catastrophe. His official position forced him to give occasional -dinner-parties, much, I imagine, against his inclinations. He -always, in the winter months, borrowed all the available oil-stoves -from his colleagues and friends, when one of these festivities was -contemplated, in order to warm his official residence without having -to go to the expense of fires. He had in some mad fit of -extravagance bought two dozen of {338} a really fine claret some -years before. The wine had long since been drunk; the bottles he -still retained _with their labels_. It was his custom to buy the -cheapest and roughest red wine he could find, and then enshrine it in -these old bottles with their mendacious labels. At his -dinner-parties these time-worn bottles were always ranged down the -tables. The evidence of palate and eye was conflicting. The palate -(as far as it could discriminate through the awful reek with which -the oil-stoves filled the room), pronounced it sour, immature _vin -ordinaire_. The label on the bottle proclaimed it Château Margaux of -1874, actually bottled at the Château itself. Politeness dictated -that we should compliment our host on this exquisite vintage, which -had, perhaps, begun to feel (as we all do) the effects of extreme old -age. A cynical Dutch colleague might possibly hazard a few remarks, -lamenting the effects of the Japanese climate on "les premiers crus -de Bordeaux." - -Life at any post would be dull were it not for the little failings of -the "chers collègues," which always give one something to talk of. - -The Japanese are ruining the beauty of their country by their insane -mania for advertising. The railways are lined with advertisements; a -beautiful hillside is desecrated by a giant advertisement, cut in the -turf, and filled in with white concrete. Even the ugly little -streets of brown packing-cases are plastered with advertisements. -The fact that these advertisements are all in Chinese characters -{339} give them a rather pleasing exotic flavour at first; that soon -wears off, and then one is only too thankful not to be able to read -them. They remain a hideous disfigurement of a fair land. - -One large Japanese-owned department store in Tokyo had a brass band -playing in front of it all day, producing an ear-splitting din. The -bandsmen were little Japanese boys dressed, of all things in the -world, as Highlanders. No one who has not seen it can imagine the -intensely grotesque effect of a little stumpy, bandy-legged Jap boy -in a red tartan kilt, bare knees, and a Glengarry bonnet. No one who -has not heard them can conceive the appalling sounds they produced -from their brass instruments, or can form any conception of the -Japanese idea of "rag-time." - -We have in this country some very competent amateurs who, to judge -from the picture papers, have reduced the gentle art of -self-advertisement to a science. - -I think these ladies would be repaid for the trouble of a voyage to -Japan by the new ideas in advertisement they would pick up from that -enterprising people. They need not blow their own trumpets, like the -little Jap Highlander bandsmen; they can get it done for them as they -know, by the Press. - - - - -{340} - -CHAPTER XI - -Petrograd through middle-aged eyes--Russians very constant -friends--Russia an Empire of shams--Over-centralisation in -administration--The system hopeless--A complete change of scene--The -West Indies--Trinidad--Personal Character of Nicholas II--The weak -point in an Autocracy--The Empress--An opportunity missed--The Great -Collapse--Terrible stories--Love of human beings for ceremonial--Some -personal apologies--Conclusion. - - -I returned twice to Petrograd in later years, the last occasion being -in 1912. A young man is generally content with the surface of -things, and accepts them at their face value, without attempting to -probe deeper. With advancing years comes the desire to test beneath -the surface. To the eye, there is but little difference between -electro-plate and solid silver, though one deep scratch on the -burnished expanse of the former is sufficient to reveal the baser -metal underlying it. - -Things Russian have for some reason always had a strange attraction -for me, and their glamour had not departed even after so many years. -It was pleasant, too, to hear the soft, sibilant Russian tongue -again. My first return visit was at mid-summer, and seeing Peter's -City wreathed in the tender vivid greenery of Northern foliage, and -bathed in sunshine, I wondered how I could ever {341} have mentally -labelled it with the epithet "dreary." Rising from the clear -swift-rushing waters of the many-channelled Neva, its stately -pillared classical buildings outlined through the soft golden haze in -half-tones of faintest cobalt and rose-madder, this Northern Venice -appeared a dream-city, almost unreal in its setting of blue waters -and golden domes, lightly veiled in opal mist. - -Russians are not as a rule long-lived, and the great majority of my -old friends had passed away. I could not help being affected by the -manner in which the survivors amongst them welcomed me back. "Cher -ami," said the bearer of a great Russian name to me, "thirty-three -years ago we adopted you as a Russian. You were a mere boy then, you -are now getting an old man, but as long as any of your friends of old -days are alive, our houses are always open to you, and you will -always find a place for you at our tables, without an invitation. We -Russians do not change, and we never forget our old friends. We know -that you like us and our country, and my husband and I offer you all -we have." No one could fail to be touched by such steadfast -friendship, so characteristic of these warm-hearted people. - -The great charm of Russians with three or four hundred years of -tradition behind them is their entire lack of pretence and their -hatred of shams. They are absolutely natural. They often gave me as -their reason for disliking foreigners the artificiality of -non-Russians, though they expressly {342} exempted our own -nationality from this charge. That is, I think, the reason why most -Englishmen get on so well with educated Russians. - -Seeing Petrograd with the wearied eyes of experienced middle age, I -quite realised that the imposing palaces that front the line of the -quays and seem almost to float on the Neva, are every one of them -built on piles, driven deep into the marshy subsoil. Every single -house in the city rests on the same artificial base. Montferrand the -Frenchman's great cathedral of St. Isaac has had its north front -shored up by scaffolding for thirty years. Otherwise it would have -collapsed, as the unstable subsoil is unable to bear so great a -burden. On the Highest Authority we know that only a house built on -the rock can endure. This city of Petrograd was built on a quagmire, -and was typical, in that respect, of the vast Empire of which it was -the capital: an Empire erected by Peter on shifting sand. The whole -fabric of this Empire struck my maturer senses as being one gigantic -piece of "camouflage." - -For instance, a building close to St. Isaac's bears on its stately -front the inscription "Governing Senate" (I may add that the terse, -crisp Russian for this is "Pravitelsvouyuschui Senat"). To an -ordinary individual the term would seem to indicate what it says; he -would be surprised to learn that, so far from "governing," the Senate -had neither legislative nor administrative powers of its own. It was -merely a consultative body without {343} any delegate initiative; -only empowered to recommend steps for carrying into effect the orders -it received. - -And so with many other things. There were imposing façades, with -awe-inspiring inscriptions, but I had a curious feeling that -everything stopped at the façade, and there was nothing behind it. - -Students of history will remember how, on the occasion of Catherine -the Great's visit to the Crimea, her favourite, Potemkin, had -"camouflage" villages erected along the line of her progress, so that -wherever she went she found merry peasants (specially selected from -the Imperial theatres) singing and dancing amidst flower-wreathed -cottages. These villages were then taken down, and re-erected some -fifty miles further along the Empress's way, with the same -inhabitants. It was really a triumph of "camouflage," and did great -credit to Potemkin's inventive faculty. Catherine returned North -with most agreeable recollections of the teeming population of the -Crimea; of its delightfully picturesque villages, and of the ideal -conditions of life prevailing there. - -The whole Russian Empire appeared to my middle-aged eyes to be like -Potemkin's toy villages. - -My second later visit to Petrograd was in 1912, in midwinter, when I -came to the unmistakable conclusion that the epithet "dreary" was not -misplaced. The vast open spaces and broad streets with their scanty -traffic were unutterably depressing during the short hours of -uncertain daylight, {344} whilst the whirling snowflakes fell -incessantly, and the low, leaden sky pressed like a heavy pall over -this lifeless city of perpetual twilight. - -The particular business on which I had gone to Petrograd took me -daily to the various Ministries, and their gloomy interiors became -very familiar to me. - -I then saw that in these Ministries the impossible had been attempted -in the way of centralisation. The principle of the Autocracy had -been carried into the administrative domain, and every trivial detail -affecting the government of an Empire stretching from the Pacific to -the Baltic was in theory controlled by one man, the Minister of the -Department concerned. Russians are conspicuously lacking in -initiative and in organising power. The lack of initiative is -perhaps the necessary corollary of an Autocracy, for under an -Autocracy it would be unsafe for any private individual to show much -original driving power: and organisation surely means successful -delegation. A born organiser chooses his subordinates with great -care; having chosen them, he delegates certain duties to them, and as -long as they perform these duties to his satisfaction he does not -interfere with them. The Russian system was just the reverse: -everything was nominally concentrated in the hands of one man. A -really able and zealous Minister might possibly have settled a -hundredth part of the questions daily submitted for his personal -decision. It required no great political foresight to understand -{345} that, were this administrative machine subjected to any unusual -strain, it would collapse into hopeless confusion. - -Being no longer young, I found the penetrating damp cold of Petrograd -very trying. The airlessness too of the steam-heated and -hermetically sealed houses affected me. I had, in any case, intended -to proceed to the West Indies as soon as my task in Petrograd was -concluded. As my business occupied a far longer time than I had -anticipated, I determined to go direct to London from Petrograd, stay -two nights there, and then join the mail steamer for the West Indies. - -Thus it came about that I was drinking my morning coffee in a room of -the British Embassy at Petrograd, looking through the double windows -at the driving snowflakes falling on the Troitsky Square, at the -frozen hummocks of the Neva, and at the sheepskin-clothed peasants -plodding through the fresh-fallen snowdrifts, whilst the grey -cotton-wool sky seemed to press down almost on to the roofs of the -houses, and the golden needle of the Fortress Church gleamed dully -through the murky atmosphere. Three weeks afterwards to a day, I was -sitting in the early morning on a balcony on the upper floor of -Government House, Trinidad, clad in the lightest of pyjamas, enjoying -the only approach to coolness to be found in that sultry island. The -balcony overlooked the famous Botanic Gardens which so enraptured -Charles Kingsley. In front of me rose a gigantic Saman tree, larger -than {346} any oak, one mass of tenderest green, and of tassels of -silky pink blossoms. At dawn, the dew still lay on those blossoms, -and swarms of hummingbirds, flashing living jewels of ruby, sapphire, -and emerald, were darting to and fro taking their toll of the nectar. -The nutmeg trees were in flower, perfuming the whole air, and the -fragrance of a yellow tree-gardenia, an importation from West Africa, -was almost overpowering. The chatter of the West Indian negroes, and -of the East Indian coolies employed in the Botanic Gardens, replaced -the soft, hissing Russian language, and over the gorgeous tropical -tangle of the gardens the Venezulean mountains of the mainland rose -mistily blue across the waters of the Gulf of Paria. I do not -believe that in three short weeks it would be possible to find a -greater change in climatic, geographical, or social conditions. From -a temperature of 5° below zero to 94° in the shade; from the Gulf of -Finland to the Spanish Main; from snow and ice to the exuberant -tropical vegetation of one of the hottest islands in the world! The -change, too, from the lifeless, snow-swept streets of Petrograd, -monotonously grey in the sad-coloured Northern winter daylight, to -the gaily painted bungalows of the white inhabitants of the -Port-of-Spain, standing in gardens blazing with impossibly brilliant -flowers of scarlet, orange, and vivid blue, quivering under the -fierce rays of the sun, was sufficiently startling. The only flowers -I have ever seen to rival the garish rainbow brilliance of the -gardens of Port-of-Spain {347} were the painted ones in the -"Zauber-Garten" in the second act of "Parsifal," as given at Bayreuth. - -It so happened that when Nicholas II visited India in 1890 as -Heir-Apparent, I stayed in the same house with him for ten days, and -consequently saw a great deal of him. He was, I am convinced, a most -conscientious man, intensely anxious to fulfill his duty to the -people he would one day rule; but he was inconstant of purpose, and -his intellectual equipment was insufficient for his responsibilities. -The fatal flaw in an Autocracy is that everything obviously hinges on -the personal character of the Autocrat. It would be absurd to expect -an unbroken series of rulers of first-class ability. It is, I -suppose, for this reason that the succession to the Russian throne -was, in theory at all events, not hereditary. The Tsars of old -nominated their successors, and I think I am right in saying that the -Emperors still claimed the privilege. In fact, to set any -limitations to the power of an Autocrat would be a contradiction in -terms. - -Nicholas II was always influenced by those surrounding him, and it -cannot be said that he chose his associates with much discretion. -There was, in particular, one fatal influence very near indeed to -him. From those well qualified to judge, I hear that it is unjust to -accuse the Empress of being a Germanophile, or of being in any way a -traitor to the interests of her adopted country. She was obsessed -with one idea: to hand on the Autocracy intact to her idolised little -son, and she had, in addition, a {348} great love of power. When the -love of power takes possession of a woman, it seems to change her -whole character, and my own experience is that no woman will ever -voluntarily surrender one scrap of that power, be the consequences -what they may. When to a naturally imperious nature there is joined -a neurotic, hysterical temperament, the consequences can be -disastrous. The baneful influence of the obscene illiterate monk -Rasputin over the Empress is a matter of common knowledge, and she, -poor woman, paid dearly enough for her faults. I always think that -Nicholas II missed the great opportunity of his life on that fateful -Sunday, January 22, 1905, when thousands of workmen, headed by Father -Gapon (who subsequently proved to be an agent provocateur in the pay -of the police), marched to the Winter Palace and clamoured for an -interview with their Emperor. Had Nicholas II gone out entirely -alone to meet the deputations, as I feel sure his father and -grandfather would have done, I firmly believe that it would have -changed the whole course of events; but his courage failed him. A -timid Autocrat is self-condemned. Instead of meeting their -Sovereign, the crowd were met by machine-guns. In 1912, Nicholas II -had only slept one night in Petrograd since his accession, and the -Empress had only made day visits. Not even the Ambassadresses had -seen the Empress for six years, and there had been no Court -entertainments at all. - -{349} - -The Imperial couple remained in perpetual seclusion at Tsarskoe Selo. - -In my days, Alexander II was constantly to be seen driving in the -streets of Petrograd entirely alone and unattended, without any -escort whatever. The only things that marked out his sledge were the -two splendid horses (the one in shafts, the loose "pristashka" -galloping alongside in long traces), and the kaftan of his coachman, -which was green instead of the universal blue of public and private -carriages alike. - -The low mutterings of the coming storm were very audible in 1912. -Personally, I thought the change would take the form of a "Palace -Revolution," so common in Russian history; _i.e._, that the existing -Sovereign would be dethroned and another installed in his place. - -I cannot say how thankful I am that so few of my old friends lived to -see the final collapse, and that they were spared the agonies of -witnessing the subsequent orgies of murder, spoliation, and lust that -overwhelmed the unhappy land and deluged it in blood. - -Horrible stories have reached us of a kindly, white-headed old couple -being imprisoned for months in a narrow cell of the Fortress, and -then being taken out at dawn, and butchered without trial; of a -highly cultivated old lady of seventy-six being driven from her bed -by the mob, and thrust into the bitter cold of a Petrograd street in -January, in her night-dress, and there clubbed to death in {350} the -snow. God grant that these stories may be untrue; the evidence, -though, is terribly circumstantial, and from Russia comes only an -ominous silence. - -If I am asked what will be the eventual outcome in Russia, I hazard -no prophecies. The strong vein of fatalism in the Russian character -must be taken into consideration, also the curious lack of -initiative. They are a people who revel in endless futile talk, and -love to get drunk on words and phrases. Eighty per cent. of the -population are grossly ignorant peasants, living in isolated -communities, and I fail to see how they can take any combined action. -It must be remembered that, with the exception of Lenin, the men who -have grasped the reins of power are not Russians, but Jews, mainly of -German or Polish origin. They do not, therefore, share the fatal -inertness of the Russian temperament. - -I started with the idea of giving some description of a state of -things which has, perhaps, vanished for all time from what were five -years ago the three great Empires of Eastern Europe. - -There is, I think, inherent in all human beings a love of ceremonial. -The great influence the Roman and Eastern Churches exercise over -their adherents is due, I venture to say, in a great measure to their -gorgeous ceremonial. In proof of this, I would instance lands where -a severer form of religion prevails, and where this innate love of -ceremonial finds its rest in the elaborate ritual of Masonic and -kindred bodies, since it is denied it in ecclesiastical matters. The -reason that Buddhism, {351} imported from China into Japan in the -sixth century, succeeded so largely in ousting Shintoism, the ancient -national religion, was that there is neither ritual nor ceremonial in -a Shinto temple, and the complicated ceremonies of Buddhism supplied -this curious craving in human nature, until eventually Buddhism and -Shintoism entered into a sort of ecclesiastical partnership together. - -I have far exceeded the limits which I started by assigning to myself -and, in extenuation, can only plead that old age is proverbially -garrulous. I am also fully conscious that I have at times strayed -far from my subject, but in excuse I can urge that but few people -have seen, in five different continents, as much of the surface of -this globe and of its inhabitants as it has fallen to my lot to do. -Half-forgotten incidents, irrelevant it may be to the subject in -hand, crowd back to the mind, and tempt one far afield. It is quite -possible that these bypaths of reminiscence, though interesting to -the writer, may prove wearisome to the reader, so for them I tender -my apologies. - -I have endeavoured to transfer to others pictures which remain very -clear-cut and vivid in my own mind. I cannot tell whether I have -succeeded in doing this, and I hazard no opinion as to whether the -world is a gainer or a loser by the disappearance of the pomp and -circumstance, the glitter and glamour of the three great Courts of -Eastern Europe. - -The curtain has been rung down, perhaps {352} definitely, on the -brave show. The play is played; the scenery set for the great -spectacle is either ruined or else wantonly destroyed; the puppets -who took part in the brilliant pageant are many of them (God help -them!) broken beyond power of repair.--_Finita la commedia!_ - - - - -{355} - -INDEX - -A - -Abdurrahman Khan, 316 - -A deaf diplomat, 32 - -Aehrenthal, Baron von, 306, 308, 309 - -Agra Palace, India, 186 - -A journalist outwitted, 310 - -Akbar, 186 - -Albuquerque, 237 - -Alexander II, 116; attempted assassination of, in 1880, 125, -assassination of, 157 _sqq._; sorrow of the people for, 159; funeral -of, 159 _sqq._; King Edward and Queen Alexandra at, 162, 208, 349. - -Alexander III, Order of the Garter conferred on, 162 _sqq._; -precautions for safety of, 164, 189. - -Alexandra Colony, 269 _sqq._ - -Ali Pasha and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 66. - -Alsace, 15 - -Ampthill, Lady, 27; saves the life of William II, 73 - -Ampthill, Lord, 26 - -Andrassy, Count, and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 66 - -An embarrassing situation, 114 - -An exclusive Court, 63 - -Arabi Pasha, 201, 204 - -Argentine girls, beauty of, 260 - -Aristocratic waitresses, 24-25 - -Arisugawa, Prince, 336 - -Arisugawa, Princess, 336 - -Asuncion, 276 _sqq._ - -Augusta, Empress, 34 - -Austria, disappearance of the Court, 13 - -Austrian aristocracy, characteristics of, 49; interrelationship of, 50 - -Austrian diplomat, a deaf, 32 - -Awkward predicament, an, 137-138 - - - -B - -Bahia, 240 - -Barmecides' feast, a, 25 - -Bay of Chaleurs, 300 - -Beaconsfield, Lord, and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 66, 67 - -Bear hunt in Russia, a, 139-141 - -Beauharnais, Countess Zena, 179 - -Beethoven, 59 - -Bieloselskaya, Princess, 179 - -Bismarck, 16 _sqq._, 27, 28; on male and female nations, 28 - -Bismarck, Count Herbert, 30, 39, 308 - -Biting-fish in South America, 274 - -Blessing of the Neva, the, 122 - -Blowitz, M. de, 68, 69 - -Botanic Gardens at Rio de Janeiro, the, 245 - -Brazil, 238 - -British Minister, a, in Carnival time, 250 _sqq._ - -Broadminded Scots parents, 111 - -Buckingham Palace and Berlin Schloss compared, 39-40 - -Buenos Ayres, 248 _sqq._; carnival at, 250; masked balls in, 255; -sport in, 264 _sqq._ - -Bulow, Hans von, 26 - - - -C - -Calcutta, the Maidan at, 321 - -"Camp," the, Buenos Ayres, 249 - -Campbell, Colonel, 234 - -Canada, 300 _sqq._ - -Carnival at Buenos Ayres, the, 249 - -Cathedrals, three famous Moscow, 183 - -Carolath-Beuthen, Princess, 39 - -Catherine the Great, 192; and the violet in Tsarskoe Park, 194 - -Charlemagne, 50 - -Cintra, 235 - -Circus in Lisbon, 221 - -Circus performer who became a Bishop, 225-226 - -Classification of nationalities, Bismarck's, 28 - -Clown, the author's personal experience as a, 223 - -Commercial Court Chamberlain, a, 243 - -Congress of 1878, the, in Berlin, 66 - -Connaught, Duchess of, 43 - -Conversational difficulties, 43-47, 166 - -Court beauties, 39, 179 - -Courting in Portugal, a curious custom, 217 - -"Croissants"--Viennese roll, origin of, 57 - -Crown Prince, 79 - -Culinary curiosities in Japan, 318-319 - -Curious sporting incidents, 145 _sq._ - - - -D - -Darwin, 257 - -Dawn in a Finnish forest, 174 _sq._ - -"Deaf and dumb people," 134 - -Deference paid to Austrian Archdukes, 63 - -Delyanoff, M., Minister of Education, 127; curious obsequies of, -127-129 - -Delyanoff, Mme., 127 - -Dentist, a polite, 205-206 - -Depreciated currency in the Argentine, 275 - -De Reszke, Edouard, 220 - -De Reszke, Jean, 220 - -De Reszke, Mlle., 220 - -Diaz, 237 - -Dolgorouki, Prince Alexander, 180 - -Dolgorouki, Princess Kitty, 179 - -Dolgorouki, Princess Mary, 179, 180 - -Dom Fernando, 212, 213, 235 - -Dom Luiz, 212-213 - -Dom Pedro, Emperor of Brazil, 243-244-245-246 - -Doré, Gustave, 234-235 - -Dowdeswell, Admiral, 231 - -Drunkenness in Russia, 141-142 - -Duc de Croy, the, a Belgian and an Austrian subject, 53 - -Dué, M., Swedish Minister to Russia, 128 - -Dufferin, Marchioness of, 88-89, 129, 139, 154, 159, 160 - -Dufferin, Marquis of, Ambassador to Petrograd, 88 _sqq._, 128, 129, -153; his diplomatic methods, 156-157-310 - - - -E - -Easter Supper in Russia, the, 109 - -Easy-going Austria, 49 - -Edinburgh, Duchess of, 125 - -Edinburgh, Duke of, 123 - -Elector of Brandenburg, 52 - -Emperor Frederick, 34, 79 - -Emperor William I, 32-33 - -Empress Marie, 208 - -Empress Elisabeth, 63-64 - -Empress Frederick, 33, 79 - -England, "Junker" Party's hostility to, 20 - -Environs of Berlin, 70 _sqq._ - -European Courts, disappearance of, 13 - -Exciting salmon fishing, 166-167 - -Expensive entertainment, an, 153 - -Exquisite Russian church music, 92 - -Extradition Treaty between Great Britain and Paraguay, 204 - - - -F - -Ferdinand of Saxe-Coburg, Prince, 212 - -Finland, 164-165 _sqq._ - -Footman as entomologist, the, 246-247 - -Formosa, 277 - -Fortress Church, Petrograd, 89, 90 - -Francis II, last of the Holy Roman Emperors, 50-51 - -Franz Josef of Austria, 52, 308 - -Frederick Charles of Prussia, Princess, 34 - -Frederick Count of Hohenzollern, 52 - -Frederick the Great, 27, 36, 74-75 - -Frederick William I, 74 - -French Ambassador's ball at Moscow, unusual incident at, 190-191 - - - -G - -Gapon, Father, 348 - -Gargantuan dinner, a, 187-188 - -Gatchina Palace, 208; children's play-room at, 209-210 - -George V, 186 - -German "door-politeness," 219 - -Germany, disappearance of the Court, 13 - -Germany, music in, 22-23 - -Ghika, Prince, Roumanian Minister to Russia, 128 - -Giers, M. de, Russian Minister for Foreign Affairs, 103, 202, 203, 204 - -Gigantic Court Pages, 40 - -Gonçalves, 241 - -Gortchakoff, Prince, and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 66, 67 - -Gourmet, an ecclesiastical, 41-45 - -Gran Chaco, the, 268 - -Groote Constantia, 197 - -Gulf between Russian nobility and peasants, 147 - - - -H - -Harraka Niska, 164 _sqq._ - -Henry the Navigator, Prince, 237 - -Hilarious funeral, a, 127-128 - -Hohenzollerns ever a grasping race, 52 - -"Holy Roman Emperor," the, 50 - -Hooveny M. van der, Netherlands Minister to Russia, 128 - -Howard, Dick, 207, 281, 285 - -Humbert, King, 326 - -Hungary, invasion of, by the Turks in 1683, 56 - - - -I - -Ice-boating on the Gulf of Finland, 176 - -India, 186 - -Indoor games, Russians' love for, 177 - -Inelegant palaces, 75 - -Inquisitive peasant, an, 135 - -"Intelligenzia," the, 104 - -Irritating customs in Vienna, 54-55 - -Ismail, Khedive of Egypt, 201 - -Ivan III, 184 - - - -J - -Japan, 317-330, 343 _sqq._ - -Japanese advertising, 338 - -Japanese politeness, 334 - -Jardine, Captain, 284 _sqq._ - -Jena, 16 - -Jomini, Baron, 103 - -"Junker" Party, hostility of, towards England, 20 - - - -K - -Karolyi, Countess, Austrian Ambassadress in Berlin, 38, 63 - -Katheodory Pasha and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 66 - -Kiderlin-Waechter, Baron von, 306-307 - -King Edward attends Alexander II's funeral, 162 - -King of Prussia proclaimed German Emperor at Versailles, 15 - -Kingsley, Charles, 345 - -Klepsch, Colonel, 309 - -Koltesha, 167-168-169 - -Koltesba, shooting at, 168 _sqq._ - -Königgrätz, 15 - -Kremlin, the, 182 _sqq._; the Great Palace, 185 - -Kyoto, the Emperor's palace, 321 - - - -L - -Ladies' unchangeable Court fashions in Russia, 117 - -Lapp encampment on the Neva, 112-113 - -Lawson, Sir Wilfrid, 307 - -Lazareff and the great Orloff diamond, 124 - -Leopold I, 52 - -"Les Bals des Palmiers," 120 - -Leuchtenberg, Duchess of, _see_ Beauharnais - -Liebknecht, Herr, 29 - -Lisbon, 211 - -Lisbon, beauty of, 229 - -Lister, Lord, 192 - -Liszt, 26 - -Lobkowitz Palace, 59 - -Lobkowitz, Prince, 59 - -Lopez, Francisco, 277 - -Lorraine, 15 - -Louis XIV, 52 - -Louis XVI, 57 - -Louise Margaret of Prussia, Princess, 43 - -Louise, Queen, of Prussia, 30-31 - -Lovendal, Count, Danish Minister in Petrograd, 306-307 - -Luncheon in pyjamas, 154 - -Luxembourg Palace, the, 36 - - - -M - -"Making the Circle," trying ordeal of Prussian Princesses, 43 - -Margherita, Queen, 326 - -Maria II, Queen, 212 - -Marie Antoinette, 57 - -Mendelssohn, 31 - -Midnight drive, an exciting, 150-151 - -Militarism in Germany, 15 _sqq._ - -Misguided midshipmen, 231-232 - -Mitsu, Count, 333 - -Mitsu, Countess, 334, 337 - -Moltke, Field-Marshal von, 30 - -Montebello, Comte de, French Ambassador, 189-190 - -Montebello, Comtesse de, 189 - -Montferrand, M., Architect of St. Isaac's, Petrograd, 91 - -Moscow, beauty of, 181-182 _sqq._ - -Moscow cathedrals, three famous, 183 - -Moscow, Imperial Treasury at, splendour of, 184 - -Music, Germans as lovers of, 22 - -"Musical chairs" in Japan, 319 - - - -N - -Napoleon I, 16; coronation of, 50-51; bribes electors of Bavaria, -Württemberg, and Saxony, 51 - -"Napoleon III," 36-37 - -Narrow escape from drowning of William II, 73 - -Natural beauties of Brazil, 246 - -Neva, blessing of the, 121 - -Newspaper enterprise, 316 - -Nicholas I, 185-194 - -Nicholas II, 158, 189, 347 _sqq._ - -Nihilist friends, 104 _sqq._ - -Nikko river, Japan, 331 - -Nondescript waiters, 184 - -Novel form of sport, a, 171-172 _sq._ - - - -O - -Old Schloss, Berlin, 34-35; comparison with Buckingham Palace, 39-40 - -Opera in Lisbon, 221 - -Organ Mountains, the, 245, 248 - -Oriental traits in Russian character, 101 - -Orloff diamond, the, 124 - - - -P - -Paget, Sir Augustus, 327 - -Palaeologus, Sophia, wife of Ivan III, 184 - -Paraguay, 276 _sqq._; Extradition Treaty between Great Britain and, -204 - -Paraguayan race meeting, a, 281 - -Paraguayan women, attractive, 282 - -Paraná river, the, 277 - -Patiño Cué, 285 _sqq._ - -Peace Congress between Russia and Turkey in Berlin, 1878, 66 _sqq._ - -Peasant's house in Russia, a, 131-132 _sqq._ - -Pernambuco, 240 - -Peter the Great, 51, 95, 102-103 _sq._ - -Peterhof, 196; its charming park, 197; a plethora of palaces round, -198 - -Petrograd, transference to, 76; a disappointing capital, 86; English -Embassy at, 89; Palace ball, 119; balls at, peculiarities of, 178; -famous Society beauties of, 179; inclement climate of, 193; -revisited, 340 _sqq._ - -Petropolis, diversions at, 245-246, 248 - -Pombal, Marquis de, 230 - -Portugal, two Kings of, 212 - -Portuguese bull-fights, bloodless, 214 _sqq._; comparison of with -Spanish, 216 - -Portuguese coinage, 228 - -Portuguese politeness, 220 - -Potemkin, 343 - -Potsdam, 71-72 _sqq._ - -Potsdam Palaces, 74-75 - -Prussian militarism, 15 _sqq._ - -Prussian Princesses, a trying ordeal, 43 - -"Princesse Château," 95 _sqq._, 180 - -Pugnacious Court Pages, 40-41 - - - -Q - -Quebec, 300 - -Queen Alexandra attends Alexander II's funeral, 162 - -Queen Victoria, queenly dignity of, 116 - -Queen Victoria confers Order of the Garter on Alexander III, 162 -_sqq._ - -Quirinal at Rome, the, 14 - - - -R - -Radziwill, Princess William, 39 - -"Rag-time" and Rubinstein, 25-26 - -Rasputin, 348 - -Rauch, 31 - -Red-bearded priest, the, 110 - -Richter, Gustav, 30 - -Richter, Mme., 31 - -River Plate, the, 299 - -"Ring," the, in Berlin, 23 - -Rio de Janeiro, beauty of, 240 - -Rome, the Quirinal, 14 - -Rubinstein and "Rag-time," 25-26 - -Russia, disappearance of the Court, 13 - -Russia and Turkey, Peace Congress in Berlin, 66 - -Russian frontier police, 84 - -Russian gipsies, 149-150; their fascinating singing, 151-152 - -Russian illusions, 198-199 - -Russian Imperial Yacht Club, the, 100 - -Russian ladies' unchangeable Court fashions, 117 - -Russian language, difficulties exaggerated, 94 - -Russian limitations, 102 - -Russian police, 77 - -Russian village habits, 146 - -Russians really Orientals, 101 - - - -S - -Sadowa, 15 - -St. Isaac's church, Petrograd, 91; midnight Easter Mass at, 105 _sqq._ - -Salisbury, Lord, and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 66-69 - -Scandalized governess, a, 155 - -Schleinitz, Mme. de, 25 - -"Schlüssel-Geld," an unpopular tax, 55 - -Schouvaloff, Count Peter, and the Peace Congress in Berlin, 1878, 66; -180 - -Schouvaloff, Countess Betsy, 179-180 - -Secret Police in Russia, the, 99 - -Seven Weeks' War, the, 15 - -Shah Jehan, 186-196 - -Shennan, Mr. David, 261-262 - -Sigismund, 52 - -Ski-ing, 168 _sq._ - -Skobeleff, General, 179 - -Slovenly Russian uniforms, 118 - -Sobieski, John, King of Poland, routs the Turks, 56 - -Spanish and Portuguese bull-fights, difference between, 216 - -Sport in Russia, 128-129 - -Strauss, Johann, 58; an exacting conductor, 59 - -"Street of toleration," the, 126 - -Strousberg, Herr, railway magnate, 31 - -Stürmer, M., destroyer of the Russian Empire, 158 - -Sullivan, Sir Arthur, in Petrograd, 93 - - - -T - -Talleyrand, 50 - -Tel-el-Kebir, 204 - -Tetschen, 48 - -Teutonic Knights, the, 16 - -Tewfik, 201 - -Tigre, the, 299 - -Toboganning in Finland, 174-175 _sq._ - -Tokugawa dynasty, 320 - -Tokyo, 317 - -Tokyo, Uyeno Park at, 325; 332 - -Trinidad, 345 - -Tsarskoe Park, curiosities in, 193 - -Tsarskoe Selo, 191 _sqq._ - -Turkey and Russia, Peace Congress in Berlin, 66 - -Turks, invasion of Hungary, by, in 1683, 56 - -Turks routed by John Sobieski in 1683, 56 - - - -U - -Ultimatum to Russia, a young man's, 202 - -Unusual occupants of a palace, 126 - -Urbain, the cook, 42 - - - -V - -Van der Stell, Governor, 197 - -Vasco de Gama, 237 - -Victoria, Queen, 42 - -Victor Emmanuel, 14 - -Vienna, 48 _sqq._ - -Vienna, delightful environs of, 64 - -Viennese Court entertainments, 62 - -Viennese orchestras, 55 _sq._ - -Viennese restaurants and orchestras, excellence of, 55 - -Viennese women, comeliness of, 57 - -Villages in Russia, similarity of, 131-132 - -Vladimir, Grand Duke and death of Alexander II, 159 - - - -W - -Waddington, M., and the Congress of Berlin, 1878, 67 - -Wagner, the "Ring" in Berlin, 23-24, 25 - -Waitresses, aristocratic, 24-25 - -Water-throwing at Buenos Ayres Carnival, 249 - -Wends, the, 16 - -William IV, 72 - -Winter Palace, Petrograd, the, 114-122 _sqq._ - -Wolseley, Sir Garnet, 204 - -Wolves as fellow travelers, 131 - - - -Y - -Yellow fever at Rio de Janeiro, 241-242-243 - - - - - - - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Vanished Pomps of Yesterday, by -Frederic Hamilton - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY *** - -***** This file should be named 60901-8.txt or 60901-8.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/0/9/0/60901/ - -Produced by Al Haines -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The Vanished Pomps of Yesterday - Being Some Random Reminiscences of a British Diplomat - -Author: Frederic Hamilton - -Release Date: January 15, 2020 [EBook #60901] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY *** - - - - -Produced by Al Haines - - - - - -</pre> - - -<p class="t3b"> -<br /><br /> -THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="noindent"> - <i>By<br /> - Lord Frederic Hamilton</i><br /> -</p> - -<p class="noindent"> - THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY<br /> - THE DAYS BEFORE YESTERDAY<br /> - HERE, THERE AND EVERYWHERE<br /> -</p> - -<p class="noindent"> - <i>George H. Doran Company<br /> - New York</i><br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<h1> - THE VANISHED POMPS<br /> - OF YESTERDAY<br /> -</h1> - -<p class="t3"> - BEING<br /> -</p> - -<p class="t3b"> - <i>Some Random Reminiscences of a<br /> - British Diplomat</i><br /> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> - BY<br /> - LORD FREDERIC HAMILTON<br /> -</p> - -<p class="t4"> - Author of "Here, There and Everywhere," "The Days<br /> - Before Yesterday," etc., etc.<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> - A New and Revised Edition<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> - NEW YORK<br /> - GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t4"> - COPYRIGHT, 1921<br /> - BY GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t4"> - PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> - TO<br /> - EMILY LADY AMPTHILL<br /> - MY FIRST CHEFESSE<br /> - WITH EVER-GRATEFUL RECOLLECTIONS<br /> - OF HER KINDNESS<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -FOREWORD -</p> - -<p class="t3"> -TO THE SECOND EDITION -</p> - -<p> -The account of the boating accident at Potsdam -on page 75, differs in several particulars from the -story as given in the original edition. These -alterations have been made at the special request of the -lady concerned, who tells me that my recollections -of her story were at fault as regards several -important details. There are also a few verbal -alterations in the present edition. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -CONTENTS -</p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap01">CHAPTER I</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Special Mission to Rome—Berlin in process of -transformation—Causes of Prussian militarism—Lord and -Lady Ampthill—Berlin Society—Music-lovers—Evenings -with Wagner—Aristocratic Waitresses—Rubinstein's -rag-time—Liszt's opinions—Bismarck—Bismarck's -classification of nationalities—Bismarck's -sons—Gustav Richter—The Austrian diplomat—The -old Emperor—His defective articulation—Other -Royalties—Beauty of Berlin Palace—Description of -interior—The Luxembourg—"Napoleon III"—Three -Court beauties—The pugnacious Pages—"Making -the Circle"—Conversational difficulties—An -ecclesiastical gourmet—The Maharajah's mother -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap02">CHAPTER II</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Easy-going Austria—Vienna—Charm of town—A little -piece of history—International families—Family -pride—"Schlüssel-Geld"—Excellence of Vienna -restaurants—The origin of "<i>Croissants</i>"—Good looks of -Viennese women—Strauss's operettas—A ball in an -old Vienna house—Court entertainments—The -Empress Elisabeth—Delightful environs of Vienna—The -Berlin Congress of 1878—Lord Beaconsfield—M. de -Blowitz—Treaty telegraphed to London—Environs -of Berlin—Potsdam and its lakes—The bow-oar -of the Embassy "four"—Narrow escape of -ex-Kaiser—The Potsdam palaces—Transfer to -Petrograd—Glamour of Russia—An evening with the -Crown Prince at Potsdam -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap02">CHAPTER III</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -The Russian frontier—Frontier police—Disappointment -at aspect of Petrograd—Lord and Lady Dufferin—The -British Embassy—St. Isaac's Cathedral—Beauty -of Russian Church-music—The Russian -language—The delightful "Blue-stockings" of -Petrograd—Princess Chateau—Pleasant Russian -Society—The Secret Police—The Countess's hurried -journey—The Yacht Club—Russians really -Orientals—Their limitations—The "Intelligenzia"—My -Nihilist friends—Their lack of constructive power—Easter -Mass at St. Isaac's—Two comical incidents—The -Easter supper—The red-bearded young Priest—An -Empire built on shifting sand -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap04">CHAPTER IV</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -The Winter Palace—Its interior—Alexander II—A -Russian Court Ball—The "Bals des Palmiers"—The -Empress—The blessing of the Neva—Some -curiosities of the Winter Palace—The great Orloff -diamond—My friend the Lady-in-Waiting—Sugared -Compensations—The attempt on the Emperor's life -of 1880—Some unexpected finds in the Palace—A -most hilarious funeral—Sporting expeditions—Night -drives through the forest in mid-winter—Wolves—A -typical Russian village—A peasant's house—"Deaf -and dumb people"—The inquisitive peasant -youth—Curiosity about strangers—An embarrassing -situation—A still more awkward one—Food difficulties—A -bear hunt—My first bear—Alcoholic consequences—My -liking for the Russian peasant—The beneficent -india-rubber Ikon—Two curious sporting incidents—Village -habits—The great gulf between Russian -nobility and peasants -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap05">CHAPTER V</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -The Russian Gipsies—Midnight drives—Gipsy singing—Its -fascination—The consequences of a late night—An -unconventional luncheon—Lord Dufferin's -methods—Assassination of Alexander II—Stürmer—Pathetic -incidents in connection with the murder of -the Emperor—The funeral procession and service—Details -concerning—The Votive Church—The -Order of the Garter—Unusual incidents at the -Investiture—Precautions taken for Emperor's -safety—The Imperial train—Finland—Exciting salmon-fishing -there—Harraka Niska—Koltesha—Excellent -shooting there—Ski-running—"Ringing the game -in"—A wolf-shooting party—The obese General—Some -incidents—A novel form of sport—Black game -and capercailzie—At dawn in a Finnish forest—Immense -charm of it—Ice-hilling or "Montagnes -Russes"—Ice-boating on the Gulf of Finland -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap06">CHAPTER VI</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Love of Russians for children's games—Peculiarities of -Petrograd balls—Some famous beauties of Petrograd -Society—The varying garb of hired waiters—Moscow—Its -wonderful beauty—The forest of domes—The -Kremlin—The three famous "Cathedrals"—The -Imperial Treasury—The Sacristy—The Palace—Its -splendour—The Terem—A Gargantuan Russian -dinner—An unusual episode at the French Ambassador's -ball—Bombs—Tsarskoe Selo—Its interior—Extraordinary -collection of curiosities in Tsarskoe -Park—Origin of term "Vauxhall" for railway station -in Russia—Peterhof—Charm of park there—Two -Russian illusions—A young man of twenty-five -delivers an Ultimatum to Russia—How it came -about—M. de Giers—Other Foreign Ministers—Paraguay—The -polite Japanese dentist—A visit to Gatchina—Description -of the Palace—Delights of the children's -playroom there -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap07">CHAPTER VII</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Lisbon—The two Kings of Portugal, and of Barataria—King -Fernando and the Countess—A Lisbon bull-fight—The -"hat-trick"—Courtship window-parade—The -spurred youth of Lisbon—Portuguese politeness—The -De Reszke family—The Opera—Terrible personal -experiences in a circus—The bounding Bishop—Ecclesiastical -possibilities—Portuguese coinage—Beauty -of Lisbon—Visits of the British Fleet—Misguided -midshipman—The Legation Whale-boat—"Good -wine needs no bush"—A delightful -orange-farm—Cintra—Contrast between the Past and -Present of Portugal -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap08">CHAPTER VIII</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Brazil—Contrast between Portuguese and Spanish South -America—Moorish traditions—Amazing beauty of -Rio de Janeiro—Yellow fever—The commercial -Court Chamberlain—The Emperor Pedro—The -Botanical Gardens of Rio—The quaint diversions of -Petropolis—The liveried young entomologist—Buenos -Ayres—The charm of the "Camp"—Water -throwing—A British Minister in Carnival-time—Some -Buenos Ayres peculiarities—Masked -balls—Climatic conditions—Theatres—Restaurants—Wonderful -bird-life of the "Camp"—Estancia -Negrete—Duck-shooting—My one flamingo—An exploring -expedition in the Gran Chaco—Hardships—Alligators -and fish—Currency difficulties -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap09">CHAPTER IX</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Paraguay—Journey up the river—A primitive Capital—Dick -the Australian—His polychrome garb—A Paraguayan -Race Meeting—Beautiful figures of native -women—The "Falcon" adventurers—A quaint -railway—Patiño Cué—An extraordinary household—The -capable Australian boy—Wild life in the -swamps—"Bushed"—A literary evening—A railway -record—The Tigre midnight swims—Canada—Maddening -flies—A grand salmon-river—The Canadian -backwoods—Skunks and bears—Different views as to -industrial progress -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap10">CHAPTER X</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Former colleagues who have risen to -eminence—Kiderlin-Waechter—Aehrenthal—Colonel Klepsch—The -discomfiture of an inquisitive journalist—Origin of -certain Russian scares—Tokyo—Dulness of Geisha -dinners—Japanese culinary curiosities—"Musical -Chairs"—Lack of colour in Japan—The Tokugawa -dynasty—Japanese Gardens—The transplanted -suburban Embassy house—Cherry-blossom—Japanese -politeness—An unfortunate incident in Rome—Eastern -courtesy—The country in Japan—An Imperial -duck-catching party—An up-to-date Tokyo house—A -Shinto Temple—Linguistic difficulties at a -dinner-party—The economical colleague—Japan defaced by -advertisements -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -<a href="#chap11">CHAPTER XI</a> -</p> - -<p class="intro"> -Petrograd through middle-aged eyes—Russians very -constant friends—Russia an Empire of -shams—Over-centralisation in administration—The system -hopeless—A complete change of scene—The West -Indies—Trinidad—Personal character of Nicholas -II—The weak point in an Autocracy—The Empress—An -opportunity missed—The Great Collapse—Terrible -stories—Love of human beings for -ceremonial—Some personal apologies—Conclusion -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="noindent"> -<a href="#index">Index</a> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> - THE VANISHED POMPS OF<br /> - YESTERDAY<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="poem"> - "Lo, all our Pomp of Yesterday<br /> - Is one with Ninevah and Tyre!"<br /> - —RUDYARD KIPLING<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap01"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P13"></a>13}</span></p> - -<p class="t2"> - THE VANISHED POMPS<br /> - OF YESTERDAY<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER I -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Special Mission to Rome—Berlin in process of -transformation—Causes of Prussian militarism—Lord and Lady -Ampthill—Berlin Society—Music-lovers—Evenings with -Wagner—Aristocratic Waitresses—Rubinstein's rag-time—Liszt's -opinions—Bismarck—Bismarck's classification of -nationalists—Bismarck's sons—Gustav Richter—The Austrian -diplomat—The old Emperor—His defective articulation—Other -Royalties—Beauty of Berlin Palace—Description of -interior—The Luxembourg—"Napoleon III"—Three Court -beauties—The pugnacious Pages—"Making the Circle"—Conversational -difficulties—An ecclesiastical gourmet—The -Maharajah's mother. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -The tremendous series of events which has changed -the face of Europe since 1914 is so vast in its future -possibilities, that certain minor consequences of the -great upheaval have received but scant notice. -</p> - -<p> -Amongst these minor consequences must be included -the disappearance of the Courts of the three -Empires of Eastern Europe, Russia, Germany, and -Austria, with all their glitter and pageantry, their -pomp and brilliant <i>mise-en-scène</i>. I will hazard -no opinion as to whether the world is the better -for their loss or not; I cannot, though, help -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P14"></a>14}</span> -experiencing a feeling of regret that this prosaic, -drab-coloured twentieth century should have definitely -lost so strong an element of the picturesque, and -should have permanently severed a link which bound -it to the traditions of the mediæval days of chivalry -and romance, with their glowing colour, their -splendid spectacular displays, and the feeling of -continuity with a vanished past which they inspired. -</p> - -<p> -A tweed suit and a bowler hat are doubtless -more practical for everyday wear than a doublet -and trunk-hose. They are, however, possibly less -picturesque. -</p> - -<p> -Since, owing to various circumstances, I happen -from my very early days to have seen more of -this brave show than has fallen to the lot of most -people, some extracts from my diaries, and a few -personal reminiscences of the three great Courts -of Eastern Europe, may prove of interest. -</p> - -<p> -Up to my twentieth year I was familiar only -with our own Court. I was then sent to Rome -with a Special Mission. As King Victor Emmanuel -had but recently died, there were naturally no -Court entertainments. -</p> - -<p> -The Quirinal is a fine palace with great stately -rooms, but it struck me then, no doubt erroneously, -that the Italian Court did not yet seem quite at -home in their new surroundings, and that there -was a subtle feeling in the air of a lack of -continuity somewhere. In the "'seventies" the House -of Savoy had only been established for a very few -years in their new capital. The conditions in Rome -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P15"></a>15}</span> -had changed radically, and somehow one felt -conscious of this. -</p> - -<p> -Some ten months later, the ordeal of a competitive -examination being successfully surmounted, I -was sent to Berlin as Attaché, at the age of twenty. -</p> - -<p> -The Berlin of the "'seventies" was still in a state -of transition. The well-built, prim, dull and -somewhat provincial <i>Residenz</i> was endeavouring with -feverish energy to transform itself into a World-City, -a <i>Welt-Stadt</i>. The people were still flushed -and intoxicated with victory after victory. In the -seven years between 1864 and 1871 Prussia had -waged three successful campaigns. The first, in -conjunction with Austria, against unhappy little -Denmark in 1864; then followed, in 1866, the "Seven -Weeks' War," in which Austria was speedily -brought to her knees by the crushing defeat of -Königgrätz, or Sadowa, as it is variously called, by -which Prussia not only wrested the hegemony of -the German Confederation from her hundred-year-old -rival, but definitely excluded Austria from the -Confederation itself. The Hohenzollerns had at -length supplanted the proud House of Hapsburg. -Prussia had further virtually conquered France in -the first six weeks of the 1870 campaign, and on -the conclusion of peace found herself the richer by -Alsace, half of Lorraine, and the gigantic war -indemnity wrung from France. As a climax the King -of Prussia had, with the consent of the feudatory -princes, been proclaimed German Emperor at -Versailles on January 18, 1871, for Bismarck, with all -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P16"></a>16}</span> -his diplomacy, was unable to persuade the feudatory -kings and princes to acquiesce in the title of -Emperor <i>of</i> Germany for the Prussian King. -</p> - -<p> -The new Emperor was nominally only <i>primus -Inter Pares</i>; he was not to be over-lord. Theoretically -the crown of Charlemagne was merely revived, -but the result was that henceforth Prussia -would dominate Germany. This was a sufficient -rise for the little State which had started so modestly -in the sandy Mark of Brandenburg (the "sand-box," -as South Germans contemptuously termed it) -in the fifteenth century. To understand the -mentality of Prussians, one must realise that Prussia -is the only country <i>that always made war pay</i>. -She had risen with marvellous rapidity from her -humble beginnings entirely by the power of the -sword. Every campaign had increased her territory, -her wealth, and her influence, and the entire -energies of the Hohenzollern dynasty had been -centred on increasing the might of her army. The -Teutonic Knights had wrested East Prussia from -the Wends by the Power of the sword only. They -had converted the Wends to Christianity by -annihilating them, and the Prussians inherited the -traditions of the Teutonic Knights. Napoleon, it is -true, had crushed Prussia at Jena, but the latter -half of the nineteenth century was one uninterrupted -triumphal progress for her. No wonder then -that every Prussian looked upon warfare as a -business proposition, and an exceedingly paying one -at that. Everything about them had been carefully -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P17"></a>17}</span> -arranged to foster the same idea. All the -monuments in the Berlin streets were to military -heroes. The marble groups on the Schloss-Brücke -represented episodes in the life of a warrior. The -very songs taught the children in the schools were -all militarist in tone: "The Good Comrade," "The -Soldier," "The Young Recruit," "The Prayer -during Battle," all familiar to every German child. -When William II, ex-Emperor, found the stately -"White Hall" of the Palace insufficiently gorgeous -to accord with his megalomania, he called in the -architect Ihne, and gave directions for a new frieze -round the hall representing "victorious warfare -fostering art, science, trade and industry." I -imagine that William in his Dutch retreat at -Amerongen may occasionally reflect on the consequences -of warfare when it is <i>not</i> victorious. Trained in -such an atmosphere from their childhood, drinking -in militarism with their earliest breath, can it be -wondered at that Prussians worshipped brute-force, -and brute-force alone? -</p> - -<p> -Such a nation of heroes must clearly have a -capital worthy of them, a capital second to none, a -capital eclipsing Paris and Vienna. Berliners had -always been jealous of Vienna, the traditional -"Kaiser-Stadt." Now Berlin was also a "Kaiser-Stadt," -and by the magnificence of its buildings must throw -its older rival completely into the shade. Paris, -too, was the acknowledged centre of European art, -literature, and fashion. Why? The French had -proved themselves a nation of decadents, utterly -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P18"></a>18}</span> -unable to cope with German might. The sceptre -of Paris should be transferred to Berlin. So -building and renovation began at a feverish rate. -</p> - -<p> -The open drains which formerly ran down every -street in Berlin, screaming aloud to Heaven during -the summer months, were abolished, and an -admirable system of main drainage inaugurated. The -appalling rough cobble-stones, which made it -painful even to cross a Berlin street, were torn up and -hastily replaced with asphalte. A French colleague -of mine used to pretend that the cobble-stones had -been designedly chosen as pavement. Berliners -were somewhat touchy about the very sparse traffic -in their wide streets. Now one solitary <i>droschke</i>, -rumbling heavily over these cobble-stones, produced -such a deafening din that the foreigner was deluded -into thinking that the Berlin traffic rivalled that of -London or Paris in its density. -</p> - -<p> -Berlin is of too recent growth to have any -elements of the picturesque about it. It stands on -perfectly flat ground, and its long, straight streets -are terribly wearisome to the eye. Miles and miles -of ornate stucco are apt to become monotonous, even -if decorated with porcelain plaques, glass mosaics, -and other incongruous details dear to the garish -soul of the Berliner. In their rage for modernity, -the Municipality destroyed the one architectural -feature of the town. Some remaining eighteenth -century houses had a local peculiarity. The front -doors were on the first floor, and were approached -by two steeply inclined planes, locally known as <i>die -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P19"></a>19}</span> -Rampe</i>. A carriage (with, I imagine, infinite -discomfort to the horses) could just struggle up one -of these <i>Rampe</i>, deposit its load, and crawl down -again to the street-level. These inclined planes were -nearly all swept away. The <i>Rampe</i> may have been -inconvenient, but they were individual, local and -picturesque. -</p> - -<p> -I arrived at the age of twenty at this Berlin in -active process of ultra-modernising itself, and in -one respect I was most fortunate. -</p> - -<p> -The then British Ambassador, one of the very -ablest men the English Diplomatic Service has -ever possessed, and his wife, Lady Ampthill, -occupied a quite exceptional position. Lord Ampthill -was a really close and trusted friend of Bismarck, -who had great faith in his prescience and in his -ability to gauge the probable trend of events, and -he was also immensely liked by the old Emperor -William, who had implicit confidence in him. Under -a light and debonair manner the Ambassador -concealed a tremendous reserve of dignity. He was a -man, too, of quick decisions and great strength of -character. Lady Ampthill was a woman of exceptional -charm and quick intelligence, with the social -gift developed to its highest point in her. Both the -Ambassador and his wife spoke French, German, -and Italian as easily and as correctly as they did -English. The Ambassador was the <i>doyen</i>, or senior -member, of the Diplomatic Body, and Lady Ampthill -was the most intimate friend of the Crown -Princess, afterwards the Empress Frederick. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P20"></a>20}</span> -</p> - -<p> -From these varied circumstances, and also from -sheer force of character, Lady Ampthill had -become the unchallenged social arbitress of Berlin, -a position never before conceded to any foreigner. -As the French phrase runs, "<i>Elle faisait la pluie -et le beau temps à Berlin.</i>" -</p> - -<p> -To a boy of twenty life is very pleasant, and -the novel surroundings and new faces amused me. -People were most kind to me, but I soon made the -discovery that many others had made before me, -that at the end of two years one knows Prussians -no better than one did at the end of the first -fortnight; that there was some indefinable, intangible -barrier between them and the foreigner that nothing -could surmount. It was not long, too, before -I became conscious of the under-current of intense -hostility to my own country prevailing amongst the -"Court Party," or what would now be termed the -"Junker" Party. These people looked upon Russia -as their ideal of a Monarchy. The Emperor of -Russia was an acknowledged autocrat; the British -Sovereign a constitutional monarch, or, if the term -be preferred, more or less a figure-head. Tempering -their admiration of Russia was a barely-concealed -dread of the potential resources of that -mighty Empire, whose military power was at that -period absurdly overestimated. England did not -claim to be a military State, and in the "'seventies" -the vital importance of sea-power was not yet -understood. British statesmen, too, had an unfortunate -habit of indulging in sloppy sentimentalities -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P21"></a>21}</span> -in their speeches, and the convinced believers in -"Practical Politics" (<i>Real Politik</i>) had a profound -contempt (I guard myself from saying an -unfounded one) for sloppiness as well as for -sentimentality. -</p> - -<p> -The Berliners of the "'seventies" had not acquired -what the French term <i>l'art de vivre</i>. Prussia, during -her rapid evolution from an insignificant sandy -little principality into the leading military State of -Europe, had to practise the most rigid economy. -From the Royal Family downwards, everyone had -perforce to live with the greatest frugality, and the -traces of this remained. The "art of living" as -practised in France, England, and even in Austria -during the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries was -impossible in Prussia under the straitened -conditions prevailing there, and it is not an art to be -learnt in a day. The small dinner-party, the -gathering together of a few congenial friends, was -unknown in Berlin. Local magnates gave occasionally -great dinner-parties of thirty guests or so, at the -grotesque hour of 5 p.m. It seemed almost immoral -to array oneself in a white tie and swallow-tail -coat at four in the afternoon. The dinners on these -occasions were all sent in from the big restaurants, -and there was no display of plate, and never a -single flower. As a German friend (probably a -fervent believer in "Practical Politics") said to -me, "The best ornament of a dinner-table is also -good food"; nor did the conversation atone by its -brilliancy for the lack of the dainty trimmings which -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P22"></a>22}</span> -the taste of Western Europe expects on these -occasions. A never-failing topic of conversation was -to guess the particular restaurant which had -furnished the banquet. One connoisseur would -pretend to detect "Hiller" in the soup; another was -convinced that the fish could only have been dressed -by "Poppenberg." As soon as we had swallowed -our coffee, we were expected to make our bows and -take our leave without any post-prandial -conversation whatever, and at 7 p.m. too! -</p> - -<p> -Thirty people were gathered together to eat, -<i>weiter nichts</i>, and, to do them justice, most of -them fulfilled admirably the object with which they -had been invited. The houses, too, were so ugly. -No <i>objets d'art</i>, no personal belongings whatever, -and no flowers. The rooms might have been in an -hotel, and the occupant of the rooms might have -arrived overnight with one small modest suit-case -as his, or her, sole baggage. There was no -individuality whatever about the ordinary Berlin house, -or <i>appartement</i>. -</p> - -<p> -I can never remember having heard literature -discussed in any form whatever at Berlin. For -some reason the novelist has never taken root in -Germany. The number of good German novelists -could be counted on the fingers of both hands, and -no one seemed interested in literary topics. It -was otherwise with music. Every German is a -genuine music-lover, and the greatest music-lover -of them all was Baroness von Schleinitz, wife of -the Minister of the Royal Household. Hers was -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P23"></a>23}</span> -a charming house, the stately eighteenth century -<i>Haus-Ministerium</i>, with its ornate rococo <i>Fest-Saal</i>. -In that somewhat over-decorated hall every great -musician in Europe must have played at some time -or other. Baron von Schleinitz was, I think, the -handsomest old man I have ever seen, with delightful -old-world manners. It was a privilege to be -asked to Madame de Schleinitz's musical evenings. -She seldom asked more than forty people, and -the most rigid silence was insisted upon; still every -noted musician passing through Berlin went to her -house as a matter of course. At the time of my -arrival from England, Madame de Schleinitz had -struck up a great alliance with Wagner, and gave -two musical evenings a week as a sort of propaganda, -in order to familiarise Berlin amateurs with -the music of the "Ring." At that time the -stupendous Tetralogy had only been given at Bayreuth -and in Munich; indeed I am not sure that it had -then been performed in its entirety in the Bavarian -capital. -</p> - -<p> -In the <i>Fest-Saal</i>, with its involved and tortured -rococo curves, two grand pianos were placed side -by side, a point Wagner insisted upon, and here the -Master played us his gigantic work. The way -Wagner managed to make the piano suggest brass, -strings, or wood-wind at will was really wonderful. -I think that we were all a little puzzled by the -music of the "Ring"; possibly our ears had not -then been sufficiently trained to grasp the amazing -beauty of such a subtle web of harmonies. His -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P24"></a>24}</span> -playing finished, a small, very plainly-appointed -supper-table was placed in the middle of the -<i>Fest-Saal</i>, at which Wagner seated himself alone in state. -Then the long-wished-for moment began for his -feminine adorers. The great ladies of Berlin would -allow no one to wait on the Master but themselves, -and the bearers of the oldest and proudest names -in Prussia bustled about with prodigious fussing, -carrying plates of sauerkraut, liver sausage, black -puddings, and herring-salad, colliding with each -other, but in spite of that managing to heap the -supper-table with more Teutonic delicacies than even -Wagner's very ample appetite could assimilate. -</p> - -<p> -I fear that not one of these great ladies would -have found it easy to obtain a permanent engagement -as waitress in a restaurant, for their skill in -handling dishes and plates was hardly commensurate -with their zeal. In justice it must be added that -the professional waitress would not be encumbered -with the long and heavy train of evening dresses -in the "'seventies." These great ladies, anxious to -display their intimate knowledge of the Master's -tastes, bickered considerably amongst themselves. -"Surely, dear Countess, you know by now that -the Master never touches white bread." -</p> - -<p> -"Dearest Princess, Limburger cheese is the only -sort the Master cares for. You had better take -that Gruyère cheese away"; whilst an extremely -attractive little Countess, the bearer of a great -German name, would trip vaguely about, announcing -to the world that "The Master thinks that he could -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P25"></a>25}</span> -eat two more black puddings. Where do you -imagine that I could find them?" -</p> - -<p> -Meanwhile from another quarter one would hear -an eager "Dearest Princess, could you manage to -get some raw ham? The Master thinks that he -would like some, or else some raw smoked -goose-breast." "<i>Aber, allerliebste Gräfin, wissen Sie nicht -dass der Meister trinkt nur dunkles Bier?</i>" would -come as a pathetic protest from some slighted -worshipper who had been herself reproved for ignorance -of the Master's gastronomic tastes. -</p> - -<p> -It must regretfully be confessed that these tastes -were rather gross. Meanwhile Wagner, dressed in -a frock-coat and trousers of shiny black cloth, his -head covered with his invariable black velvet -skull-cap, would munch steadily away, taking no notice -whatever of those around him. -</p> - -<p> -The rest of us stood at a respectful distance, -watching with a certain awe this marvellous weaver -of harmonies assimilating copious nourishment. For -us it was a sort of Barmecide's feast, for beyond -the sight of Wagner at supper, we had no refreshments -of any sort offered to us. -</p> - -<p> -Soon afterwards Rubinstein, on his way to -St. Petersburg, played at Madame de Schleinitz's -house. Having learnt that Wagner always made -a point of having two grand pianos side by side -when he played, Rubinstein also insisted on having -two. To my mind, Rubinstein absolutely ruined -the effect of all his own compositions by the -tremendous pace at which he played them. It was as -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P26"></a>26}</span> -though he were longing to be through with the -whole thing. His "Melody in F," familiar to every -school-girl, he took at such a pace that I really -believe the virulent germ which forty years -afterwards was to develop into Rag-time, and to conquer -the whole world with its maddening syncopated -strains, came into being that very night, and was -evoked by Rubinstein himself out of his own -long-suffering "Melody in F." -</p> - -<p> -Our Ambassador, himself an excellent musician, -was an almost lifelong friend of Liszt. Wagner's -wife, by the way, was Lizst's daughter, and -had been previously married to Hans von Bulow, -the pianist. Liszt, when passing through Berlin, -always dined at our Embassy and played to us -afterwards. I remember well Lord Ampthill asking -Liszt where he placed Rubinstein as a pianist. -"Rubinstein is, without any question whatever, -the first pianist in the world," answered Liszt -without hesitation. "But you are forgetting yourself, -Abbé," suggested the Ambassador. "Ich," said -Liszt, striking his chest, "Ich bin der einzige -Pianist der Welt" ("I; I am the only pianist in the -world"). There was a superb arrogance about -this perfectly justifiable assertion which pleased -me enormously at the time, and pleases me still -after the lapse of so many years. -</p> - -<p> -Bismarck was a frequent visitor at our Embassy, -and was fond of dropping in informally in the -evening. Apart from his liking for our Ambassador, -he had a great belief in his judgment and -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P27"></a>27}</span> -discretion. Lady Ampthill, too, was one of the -few women Bismarck respected and really liked. -I think he had a great admiration for her -intellectual powers and quick sense of intuition. -</p> - -<p> -It is perhaps superfluous to state that no man -living now occupies the position Bismarck filled -in the "'seventies." The maker of Modern -Germany was the unchallenged dictator of Europe. -He was always very civil to the junior members of -the Embassy. I think it pleased him that we all -spoke German fluently, for the acknowledged -supremacy of the French language as a means of -communication between educated persons of different -nationalities was always a very sore point with -him. It must be remembered that Prussia herself -had only comparatively recently been released from -the thraldom of the French language. Frederick -the Great always addressed his <i>entourage</i> in French. -After 1870-71, Bismarck ordered the German Foreign -Office to reply in the German language to all -communications from the French Embassy. He -followed the same procedure with the Russian -Embassy; whereupon the Russian Ambassador -countered with a long despatch written in Russian to -the Wilhelmstrasse. He received no reply to this, -and mentioned that fact to Bismarck about a -fortnight later. "Ah!" said Bismarck reflectively, -"now that your Excellency mentions it, I think we -did receive a despatch in some unknown tongue. -I ordered it to be put carefully away until we -could procure the services of an expert to decipher -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P28"></a>28}</span> -it. I hope to be able to find such an expert in -the course of the next three or four months, and -can only trust that the matter was not a very -pressing one." -</p> - -<p> -The Ambassador took the hint, and that was the -last note in Russian that reached the Wilhelmstrasse. -</p> - -<p> -We ourselves always wrote in English, receiving -replies in German, written in the third person, -in the curiously cumbrous Prussian official style. -</p> - -<p> -Bismarck was very fond of enlarging on his -favourite theory of the male and female European -nations. The Germans themselves, the three -Scandinavian peoples, the Dutch, the English proper, -the Scotch, the Hungarians and the Turks, he -declared to be essentially male races. The Russians, -the Poles, the Bohemians, and indeed every Slavonic -people, and all Celts, he maintained, just as -emphatically, to be female races. A female race he -ungallantly defined as one given to immense -verbosity, to fickleness, and to lack of tenacity. He -conceded to these feminine races some of the -advantages of their sex, and acknowledged that they -had great powers of attraction and charm, when -they chose to exert them, and also a fluency of -speech denied to the more virile nations. He -maintained stoutly that it was quite useless to expect -efficiency in any form from one of the female races, -and he was full of contempt for the Celt and the -Slav. He contended that the most interesting -nations were the epicene ones, partaking, that is, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P29"></a>29}</span> -of the characteristics of both sexes, and he instanced -France and Italy, intensely virile in the North, -absolutely female in the South; maintaining that the -Northern French had saved their country times out -of number from the follies of the "Méridionaux." He -attributed the efficiency of the Frenchmen of -the North to the fact that they had so large a -proportion of Frankish and Norman blood in their -veins, the Franks being a Germanic tribe, and the -Normans, as their name implied, Northmen of -Scandinavian, therefore also of Teutonic, origin. He -declared that the fair-haired Piedmontese were the -driving power of Italy, and that they owed their -initiative to their descent from the Germanic hordes -who invaded Italy under Alaric in the fifth century. -Bismarck stoutly maintained that efficiency, -wherever it was found, was due to Teutonic blood; a -statement with which I will not quarrel. -</p> - -<p> -As the inventor of "Practical Politics" (<i>Real-Politik</i>), -Bismarck had a supreme contempt for -fluent talkers and for words, saying that only fools -could imagine that facts could be talked away. He -cynically added that words were sometimes useful -for "papering over structural cracks" when they -had to be concealed for a time. -</p> - -<p> -With his intensely overbearing disposition, -Bismarck could not brook the smallest contradiction, -or any criticism whatever. I have often watched -him in the Reichstag—then housed in a very modest -building—whilst being attacked, especially by -Liebknecht the Socialist. He made no effort to -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P30"></a>30}</span> -conceal his anger, and would stab the blotting-pad -before him viciously with a metal paper-cutter, his -face purple with rage. -</p> - -<p> -Bismarck himself was a very clear and forcible -speaker, with a happy knack of coining felicitous -phrases. -</p> - -<p> -His eldest son, Herbert Bismarck, inherited all -his father's arrogance and intensely overweening -disposition, without one spark of his father's genius. -He was not a popular man. -</p> - -<p> -The second son, William, universally known as -"Bill," was a genial, fair-headed giant of a man, -as generally popular as his elder brother was the -reverse. Bill Bismarck (the juxtaposition of these -two names always struck me as being comically -incongruous) drank so much beer that his hands were -always wet and clammy. He told me himself that -he always had three bottles of beer placed by his -bedside lest he should be thirsty in the night. He -did not live long. -</p> - -<p> -Moltke, the silent, clean-shaved, spare old man -with the sphinx-like face, who had himself worked -out every detail of the Franco-Prussian War long -before it materialised, was an occasional visitor at -our Embassy, as was Gustav Richter, the fashionable -Jewish artist. Richter's paintings, though now -sneered at as <i>Chocolade-Malerei</i> (chocolate-box -painting), had an enormous vogue in the "'seventies," -and were reproduced by the hundred thousand. -His picture of Queen Louise of Prussia, engravings -of which are scattered all over the world, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P31"></a>31}</span> -is only a fancy portrait, as Queen Louise had died -before Richter was born. He had Rauch's beautiful -effigy of the Queen in the mausoleum at Charlottenburg -to guide him, but the actual model was, I -believe, a member of the <i>corps de ballet</i> at the -Opera. Madame Richter was the daughter of -Mendelssohn the composer, and there was much -speculation in Berlin as to the wonderful artistic -temperament the children of such a union would -inherit. As a matter of fact, I fancy that none of -the young Richters showed any artistic gifts -whatever. -</p> - -<p> -Our Embassy was a very fine building. The -German railway magnate Strousberg had erected it -as his own residence, but as he most tactfully went -bankrupt just as the house was completed, the -British Government was able to buy it at a very low -figure indeed, and to convert it into an Embassy. -Though a little ornate, it was admirably adapted -for this purpose, having nine reception rooms, -including a huge ball-room, all communicating with -each other, on the ground floor. The "Chancery," -as the offices of an Embassy are termed, was in -another building on the Pariser Platz. This was -done to avoid the constant stream of people on -business, of applicants of various sorts, including -"D.B.S.'s" (Distressed British Subjects), continually -passing through the Embassy. Immediately opposite -our "Chancery," in the same building, and -only separated from it by a <i>porte-cochère</i>, was the -Chancery of the Austro-Hungarian Embassy. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P32"></a>32}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Count W——, the Councillor of the Austrian -Embassy, was very deaf, and had entirely lost -the power of regulating his voice. He habitually -shouted in a quarter-deck voice, audible several -hundred yards away. -</p> - -<p> -I was at work in the Chancery one day when I -heard a stupendous din arising from the Austrian -Chancery. "The Imperial Chancellor told me," -thundered this megaphone voice in stentorian -German tones, every word of which must have been -distinctly heard in the street, "that under no -circumstances whatever would Germany consent to -this arrangement. If the proposal is pressed, -Germany will resist it to the utmost, if necessary by -force of arms. The Chancellor, in giving me -this information," went on the strident voice, -"impressed upon me how absolutely secret the matter -must be kept. I need hardly inform your Excellency -that this telegram is confidential to the -highest degree." -</p> - -<p> -"What is that appalling noise in the Austrian -Chancery?" I asked our white-headed old -Chancery servant. -</p> - -<p> -"That is Count W—— dictating a cypher -telegram to Vienna," answered the old man with a -twinkle in his shrewd eyes. -</p> - -<p> -This little episode has always seemed to me -curiously typical of Austro-Hungarian methods. -</p> - -<p> -The central figure of Berlin was of course the -old Emperor William. This splendid-looking old -man may not have been an intellectual giant, but he -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P33"></a>33}</span> -certainly looked an Emperor, every inch of him. -There was something, too, very taking in his kindly -old face and genial manner. The Crown Princess, -afterwards the Empress Frederick, being a British -Princess, we were what is known in diplomatic -parlance as "une ambassade de famille." The entire -staff of the Embassy was asked to dine at the -Palace on the birthdays both of Queen Victoria and of -the Crown Princess. These dinners took place at -the unholy hour of 5 p.m., in full uniform, at the -Emperor's ugly palace on the Linden, the Old -Schloss being only used for more formal entertainments. -On these occasions the sole table decoration -consisted, quaintly enough, of rows of gigantic silver -dish-covers, each surmounted by the Prussian eagle, -with nothing under them, running down the middle -of the table. The old Emperor had been but -indifferently handled by his dentist. It had become -necessary to supplement Nature's handiwork by art, -but so unskilfully had these, what are euphemistically -termed, additions to the Emperor's mouth -been contrived, that his articulation was very defective. -It was almost impossible to hear what he said, -or indeed to make out in what language he was -addressing you. When the Emperor "made the circle," -one strained one's ears to the utmost to -obtain a glimmering of what he was saying. If one -detected an unmistakably Teutonic guttural, one -drew a bow at a venture, and murmured "<i>Zu -Befehl Majestät</i>," trusting that it might fit in. -Should one catch, on the other hand, a slight -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P34"></a>34}</span> -suspicion of a nasal "n," one imagined that the -language must be French, and interpolated a tentative -"<i>Parfaitement, Sire</i>," trusting blindly to a kind -Providence. Still the impression remains of a -kindly and very dignified old gentleman, filling his part -admirably. The Empress Augusta, who had been -beautiful in her youth, could not resign herself to -growing old gracefully. She would have made a -most charming old lady, but though well over -seventy then, she was ill-advised enough to attempt -to rejuvenate herself with a chestnut wig and an -elaborate make-up, with deplorable results. The -Empress, in addition, was afflicted with a slight -palsy of the head. -</p> - -<p> -The really magnificent figure was the Crown -Prince, afterwards the Emperor Frederick. Immensely -tall, with a full golden beard, he looked in -his white Cuirassier uniform the living embodiment -of a German legendary hero; a Lohengrin in real -life. -</p> - -<p> -Princess Frederick Charles of Prussia was a -strikingly handsome woman too, though unfortunately -nearly stone deaf. -</p> - -<p> -Though the palace on the Linden may have -been commonplace and ugly, the Old Schloss has -to my mind the finest interior in Europe. It may -lack the endless, bare, gigantic halls of the Winter -Palace in Petrograd, and it may contain fewer -rooms than the great rambling Hofburg in Vienna, -but I maintain that, with the possible exception -of the Palace in Madrid, no building in Europe -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P35"></a>35}</span> -can compare internally with the Old Schloss in -Berlin. I think the effect the Berlin palace -produces on the stranger is due to the series of rooms -which must be traversed before the State apartments -proper are reached. These rooms, of moderate -dimensions, are very richly decorated. Their -painted ceilings, encased in richly-gilt "coffered" -work in high relief, have a Venetian effect, recalling -some of the rooms in the Doge's Palace in the -sea-girt city of the Adriatic. Their silk-hung walls, -their pictures, and the splendid pieces of old -furniture they contain, redeem these rooms from the -soulless, impersonal look most palaces wear. They -recall the rooms in some of the finer English or -French country-houses, although no private house -would have them in the same number. The rooms -that dwell in my memory out of the dozen or so -that formed the <i>enfilade</i> are, first, the "Drap d'Or -Kammer," with its droll hybrid appellation, the walls -of which were hung, as its name implies, with cloth -of gold; then the "Red Eagle Room," with its -furniture and mirrors of carved wood, covered with -thin plates of beaten silver, producing an indescribably -rich effect, and the "Red Velvet" room. This -latter had its walls hung with red velvet bordered by -broad bands of silver lace, and contained some -splendid old gilt furniture. -</p> - -<p> -The Throne room was one of the most sumptuous -in the world. It had an arched painted ceiling, -from which depended some beautiful old chandeliers -of cut rock crystal, and the walls, which framed -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P36"></a>36}</span> -great panels of Gobelin tapestry of the best period, -were highly decorated, in florid rococo style, with -pilasters and carved groups representing the four -quarters of the world. The whole of the wall -surface was gilded; carvings, mouldings, and pilasters -forming one unbroken sheet of gold. We were -always told that the musicians' gallery was of solid -silver, and that it formed part of Frederick the -Great's war-chest. As a matter of fact, Frederick -had himself melted the original gallery down and -converted it into cash for one of his campaigns. By -his orders, a facsimile gallery was carved of wood -heavily silvered over. The effect produced, however, -was the same, as we were hardly in a position to -scrutinise the hall-mark. The room contained four -semi-circular buffets, rising in diminishing tiers, -loaded with the finest specimens the Prussian Crown -possessed of old German silver-gilt drinking-cups -of Nuremberg and Augsburg workmanship of the -sixteenth and seventeenth centuries. -</p> - -<p> -When the Throne room was lighted up at night -the glowing colours of the Gobelin tapestry and -the sheen of the great expanses of gold and silver -produced an effect of immense splendour. With the -possible exception of the Salle des Fêtes in the -Luxembourg Palace in Paris, it was certainly the finest -Throne room in Europe. -</p> - -<p> -The first time I saw the Luxembourg hall was as -a child of seven, under the Second Empire, when -I was absolutely awe-struck by its magnificence. -It then contained Napoleon the Third's throne, and -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P37"></a>37}</span> -was known as the "Salle du Trône." A relation -pointed out to me that the covering and curtains of -the throne, instead of being of the stereotyped -crimson velvet, were of purple velvet, all spangled -with the golden bees of the Bonapartes. The -Luxembourg hall had then in the four corners of the -coved ceiling an ornament very dear to the -meretricious but effective taste of the Second Empire. -Four immense globes of sky-blue enamel supported -four huge gilt Napoleonic eagles with outspread -wings. To the crude taste of a child the purple -velvet of the throne, powdered with golden bees, -and the gilt eagles on their turquoise globes, -appeared splendidly sumptuous. Of course after -1870 all traces of throne and eagles were removed, -as well as the countless "N. III's" with which -the walls were plentifully besprinkled. -</p> - -<p> -What an astute move of Louis Napoleon's it -was to term himself the "Third," counting the -poor little "Aiglon," the King of Rome, as the -second of the line, and thus giving a look of -continuity and stability to a brand-new dynasty! Some -people say that the assumption of this title was -due to an accident, arising out of a printer's error. -After his <i>coup d'état</i>, Louis Napoleon issued a -proclamation to the French people, ending "Vive -Napoleon!!!" The printer, mistaking the three -notes of exclamation for the numeral III, set up -"Vive Napoleon III." The proclamation appeared -in this form, and Louis Napoleon, at once recognising -the advantages of it, adhered to the style. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P38"></a>38}</span> -Whether this is true or not I cannot say. I was then -too young to be able to judge for myself, but older -people have told me that the mushroom Court of -the Tuileries eclipsed all others in Europe in -splendour. The <i>parvenu</i> dynasty needed all the aid it -could derive from gorgeous ceremonial pomp to -maintain its position successfully. -</p> - -<p> -To return to Berlin, beyond the Throne room -lay the fine picture gallery, nearly 200 feet long. -At Court entertainments all the German officers -gathered in this picture gallery and made a living -hedge, between the ranks of which the guests passed -on their way to the famous "White Hall." These -long ranks of men in their resplendent <i>Hofballanzug</i> -were really a magnificent sight, and whoever first -devised this most effective bit of stage-management -deserves great credit. -</p> - -<p> -The White Hall as I knew it was a splendidly -dignified room. As its name implies, it was entirely -white, the mouldings all being silvered instead of -gilt. Both Germans and Russians are fond of -substituting silvering for gilding. Personally I think -it most effective, but as the French with their -impeccable good taste never employ silvering, there -must be some sound artistic reason against its use. -</p> - -<p> -It must be reluctantly confessed that the show -of feminine beauty at Berlin was hardly on a level -with the perfect <i>mise-en-scène</i>. There were three -or four very beautiful women. Countess Karolyi, -the Austrian Ambassadress, herself a Hungarian, -was a tall, graceful blonde with beautiful hair; she -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P39"></a>39}</span> -was full of infinite attraction. Princess William -Radziwill, a Russian, was, I think, the loveliest -human being I have ever seen; she was, however, much -dreaded on account of her mordant tongue. Princess -Carolath-Beuthen, a Prussian, had first seen -the light some years earlier than these two ladies. -She was still a very beautiful woman, and eventually -married as her second husband Count Herbert -Bismarck, the Iron Chancellor's eldest son. -</p> - -<p> -There was, unfortunately, a very wide gap between -the looks of these "stars" and those of the -rest of the company. -</p> - -<p> -The interior of the Berlin Schloss put Buckingham -Palace completely in the shade. The London -palace was unfortunately decorated in the -"fifties," during the <i>époque de mauvais goût</i>, as the -French comprehensively term the whole period -between 1820 and 1880, and it bears the date written -on every unfortunate detail of its decoration. It is -beyond any question whatever the product of the -"period of bad taste." I missed, though, in Berlin -the wealth of flowers which turns Buckingham -Palace into a garden on Court Ball nights. Civilians -too in London have to appear at Court in knee-breeches -and stockings; in Berlin trousers were -worn, thus destroying the <i>habillé</i> look. As regards -the display of jewels and the beauty of the women -at the two Courts, Berlin was simply nowhere. -German uniforms were of every colour of the rainbow; -with us there is an undue predominance of scarlet, -so that the kaleidoscopic effect of Berlin was never -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P40"></a>40}</span> -attained in London, added to which too much scarlet -and gold tends to kill the effect of the ladies' -dresses. -</p> - -<p> -At the Prussian Court on these State occasions -an immense number of pages made their appearance. -I myself had been a Court page in my youth, -but whereas in England little boys were always -chosen for this part, in Berlin the tallest and -biggest lads were selected from the Cadet School at -Lichterfelde. A great lanky gawk six feet high, -with an incipient moustache, does not show up to -advantage in lace ruffles, with his thin spindle-shanks -encased in silk stockings; a page's trappings -being only suitable for little boys. I remember well -the day when I and my fellow-novice were -summoned to try on our new page's uniforms. Our -white satin knee-breeches and gold-embroidered -white satin waistcoats left us quite cold, but we were -both enchanted with the little pages' swords, in -their white-enamelled scabbards, which the tailor -had brought with him. We had neither of us ever -possessed a real sword of our own before, and the -steel blades were of the most inviting sharpness. -We agreed that the opportunity was too good a -one to be lost, so we determined to slip out into -the garden in our new finery and there engage in -a deadly duel. It was further agreed to thrust -really hard with the keen little blades, "just to see -what would happen." Fortunately for us, we had -been overheard. We reached the garden, and, -having found a conveniently secluded spot, had just -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P41"></a>41}</span> -commenced to make those vague flourishes with our -unaccustomed weapons which our experience, -derived from pictures, led us to believe formed the -orthodox preliminaries to a duel, when the combat -was sternly interrupted. Otherwise there would -probably have been vacancies for one if not two -fresh Pages of Honour before nightfall. What a -pity there were no "movies" in those days! What -a splendid film could have been made of two small -boys, arrayed in all the bravery of silk stockings, -white satin breeches, and lace ruffles, their red tunics -heavy with bullion embroidery, engaged in a furious -duel in a big garden. When the news of our -escapade reached the ears of the highest quarters, -preemptory orders were issued to have the steel blades -removed from our swords and replaced with -innocuous pieces of shaped wood. It was very -ignominious; still the little swords made a brave show, -and no one by looking at them could guess that -the white scabbards shielded nothing more deadly -than an inoffensive piece of oak. A page's sword, -by the way, is not worn at the left side in the -ordinary manner, but is passed through two slits in -the tunic, and is carried in the small of the back, -so that the boy can keep his hands entirely free. -</p> - -<p> -The "White Hall" has a splendid inlaid parquet -floor, with a crowned Prussian eagle in the centre -of it. This eagle was a source of immense pride -to the palace attendants, who kept it in a high -state of polish. As a result the eagle was as -slippery as ice, and woe betide the unfortunate dancer -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P42"></a>42}</span> -who set his foot on it. He was almost certain to -fall; and to fall down at a Berlin State ball was an -unpardonable offence. If a German officer, the -delinquent had his name struck off the list of those -invited for a whole year. If a member of the -Corps Diplomatique, he received strong hints to -avoid dancing again. Certainly the diplomats were -sumptuously entertained at supper at the Berlin -Palace; whether the general public fared as well -I do not know. -</p> - -<p> -Urbain, the old Emperor William's French chef, -who was responsible for these admirable suppers, -had published several cookery books in French, on -the title-page of which he described himself as -"Urbain, premier officier de bouche de S.M. l'Empereur -d'Allemagne." This quaint-sounding title was -historically quite correct, it being the official -appellation of the head cooks of the old French kings. A -feature of the Berlin State balls was the stirrup-cup -of hot punch given to departing guests. Knowing -people hurried to the grand staircase at the conclusion -of the entertainment; here servants proffered -trays of this delectable compound. It was concocted, -I believe, of equal parts of arrack and rum, with -various other unknown ingredients. In the same -way, at Buckingham Palace in Queen Victoria's -time, wise persons always asked for hock cup. This -was compounded of very old hock and curious -liqueurs, from a hundred-year-old recipe. A truly -admirable beverage! Now, alas! since Queen -Victoria's day, only a memory. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P43"></a>43}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The Princesses of the House of Prussia had one -ordeal to face should they become betrothed to a -member of the Royal Family of any other country. -They took leave formally of the diplomats at -the Palace, "making the circle" by themselves. I -have always understood that Prussian princesses -were trained for this from their childhood by being -placed in the centre of a circle of twenty chairs, and -being made to address some non-committal remark -to each chair in turn, in German, French, and -English. I remember well Princess Louise Margaret -of Prussia, afterwards our own Duchess of -Connaught, who was to become so extraordinarily -popular not only in England but in India and Canada as -well, making her farewell at Berlin on her -betrothal. She "made the circle" of some forty -people, addressing a remark or two to each, entirely -alone, save for two of the great long, gawky -Prussian pages in attendance on her, looking in their -red tunics for all the world like London-grown -geraniums—all stalk and no leaves. It is a -terribly trying ordeal for a girl of eighteen, and the -Duchess once told me that she nearly fainted from -sheer nervousness at the time, although she did not -show it in the least. -</p> - -<p> -If I may be permitted a somewhat lengthy -digression, I would say that it is at times extremely -difficult to find topics of conversation. Years -afterwards, when I was stationed at our Lisbon Legation, -the Papal Nuncio was very tenacious of his dignity. -In Catholic countries the Nuncio is <i>ex officio</i> head -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P44"></a>44}</span> -of the Diplomatic Body, and the Nuncio at Lisbon -expected every diplomat to call on him at least -six times a year. On his reception days the Nuncio -always arrayed himself in his purple robes and a lace -cotta, with his great pectoral emerald cross over -it. He then seated himself in state in a huge carved -chair, with a young priest as aide-de-camp, standing -motionless behind him. It was always my ill-fortune -to find the Nuncio alone. Now what possible -topic of conversation could I, a Protestant, find with -which to fill the necessary ten minutes with an -Italian Archbishop <i>in partibus</i>. We could not well -discuss the latest fashions in copes, or any impending -changes in the College of Cardinals. Most -providentally, I learnt that this admirable ecclesiastic, -so far from despising the pleasures of the table, -made them his principal interest in life. I know no -more of the intricacies of the Italian <i>cuisine</i> than -Melchizedek knew about frying sausages, but I had -a friend, the wife of an Italian colleague, deeply -versed in the mysteries of Tuscan cooking. This -kindly lady wrote me out in French some of the -choicest recipes in her extensive <i>répertoire</i>, and I -learnt them all off by heart. After that I was the -Nuncio's most welcome visitor. We argued hotly -over the respective merits of <i>risotto alia Milanese</i> -and <i>risotto al Salto</i>. We discussed <i>gnocchi</i>, <i>pasta -asciutta</i>, and novel methods of preparing <i>minestra</i>, -I trust without undue partisan heat, until the -excellent prelate's eyes gleamed and his mouth began to -water. Donna Maria, my Italian friend, proved an -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P45"></a>45}</span> -inexhaustible mine of recipes. She always produced -new ones, which I memorised, and occasionally wrote -out for the Nuncio, sometimes, with all the valour -of ignorance, adding a fancy ingredient or two on -my own account. On one occasion, after I had -detailed the constituent parts of an extraordinarily -succulent composition of rice, cheese, oil, -mushrooms, chestnuts, and tomatoes, the Nuncio nearly -burst into tears with emotion, and I feel convinced -that, heretic though I might be, he was fully intending -to give me his Apostolic benediction, had not the -watchful young priest checked him. I felt rewarded -for my trouble when my chief, the British Minister, -informed me that the Nuncio considered me the most -intelligent young man he knew. He added further -that he enjoyed my visits, as my conversation was -so interesting. -</p> - -<p> -The other occasion on which I experienced great -conversational difficulties was in Northern India -at the house of a most popular and sporting -Maharajah. His mother, the old Maharani, having just -completed her seventy-first year, had emerged from -the seclusion of the zenana, where she had spent -fifty-five years of her life, or, in Eastern parlance, -had "come from behind the curtain." We paid -short ceremonial visits at intervals to the old lady, -who sat amid piles of cushions, a little brown, -shrivelled, mummy-like figure, so swathed in brocades -and gold tissue as to be almost invisible. The -Maharajah was most anxious that I should talk to his -mother, but what possible subject of conversation -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P46"></a>46}</span> -could I find with an old lady who had spent -fifty-five years in the pillared (and somewhat uncleanly) -seclusions of the zenana? Added to which the -Maharani knew no Urdu, but only spoke Bengali, a -language of which I am ignorant. This entailed -the services of an interpreter, always an embarrassing -appendage. On occasions of this sort Morier's -delightful book <i>Hadji Baba</i> is invaluable, for the -author gives literal English translations of all the -most flowery Persian compliments. Had the -Maharani been a Mohammedan, I could have addressed -her as "Oh moon-faced ravisher of hearts! I -trust that you are reposing under the canopy of a -sound brain!" Being a Hindoo, however, she would -not be familiar with Persian forms of politeness. A -few remarks on lawn tennis, or the increasing price -of polo ponies, would obviously fail to interest her. -You could not well discuss fashions with an old lady -who had found one single garment sufficient for her -needs all her days, and any questions as to details -of her life in the zenana, or that of the other -inmates of that retreat, would have been indecorous in -the highest degree. Nothing then remained but to -remark that the Maharajah was looking remarkably -well, but that he had unquestionably put on a great -deal of weight since I had last seen him. I received -the startling reply from the interpreter (delivered -in the clipped, staccato tones most natives of India -assume when they speak English), "Her Highness -says that, thanks to God, and to his mother's cooking, -her son's belly is increasing indeed to vast size." -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P47"></a>47}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Bearing in mind these later conversational -difficulties, I cannot but admire the ease with which -Royal personages, from long practice, manage to -address appropriate and varied remarks to perhaps -forty people of different nationalities, whilst -"making the circle." -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap02"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P48"></a>48}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER II -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Easy-going Austria—Vienna—Charm of town—A little piece of -history—-International families—Family -pride—"Schlüssel-Geld"—Excellence of Vienna restaurants—The origin of -"<i>Croissants</i>"—Good looks of Viennese women—Strauss's -operettas—A ball in an old Vienna house—Court -entertainments—The Empress Elisabeth—Delightful environs of -Vienna—The Berlin Congress of 1878—Lord Beaconsfield—M. de -Blowitz—Treaty telegraphed to London—Environs -of Berlin—Potsdam and its lakes—The bow-oar of the -Embassy "four"—Narrow escape of ex-Kaiser—The -Potsdam palaces—Transfer to Petrograd—Glamour of -Russia—An evening with the Crown Prince at Potsdam. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -Our Embassy at Vienna was greatly overworked -at this time, owing to the illness of two of the staff, -and some fresh developments of the perennial -"Eastern Question." I was accordingly "lent" -to the Vienna Embassy for as long as was -necessary, and left at once for the Austrian capital. -</p> - -<p> -At the frontier station of Tetschen the transition -from cast-iron, dictatorial, overbearing Prussian -efficiency to the good-natured, easy-going, slipshod -methods of the "ramshackle Empire" was immediately -apparent. -</p> - -<p> -The change from Berlin to Vienna was refreshing. -The straight, monotonous, well-kept streets of the -Northern capital lacked life and animation. It was -a very fine frame enclosing no picture. The Vienna -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P49"></a>49}</span> -streets were as gay as those of Paris, and one was -conscious of being in a city with centuries of -traditions. The Inner Town of Vienna with its narrow -winding streets is extraordinarily picturesque. The -demolisher has not been given the free hand he has -been allowed in Paris, and the fine <i>baroque</i> houses -still remaining give an air of great distinction to -this part of the town, with its many highly-decorative, -if somewhat florid, fountains and columns. One -was no longer in the "pushful" atmosphere of -Prussia. These cheery, easy-going Viennese loved -music and dancing, eating and drinking, laughter -and fun. They were quite content to drift lazily -down the stream of life, with as much enjoyment -and as little trouble as possible. They might be a -decadent race, but they were essentially <i>gemüthliche -Leute</i>. The untranslatable epithet <i>gemüthlich</i> -implies something at once "comfortable," "sociable," -"cosy," and "pleasant." -</p> - -<p> -The Austrian aristocracy were most charming -people. They had all intermarried for centuries, -and if they did not trouble their intellect much, -there may have been physical difficulties connected -with the process for which they were not responsible. -The degree of warmth of their reception of -foreigners was largely dependent upon whether he, -or she, could show the indispensable <i>sechzehn Ahnen</i> -(the "sixteen quarterings"). Once satisfied (or -the reverse) as to this point, to which they attach -immense importance, the situation became easier. -As the whole of these people were interrelated, they -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P50"></a>50}</span> -were all on Christian names terms, and the various -"Mitzis," "Kitzis," "Fritzis," and other -characteristically Austrian abbreviations were a little -difficult to place at times. -</p> - -<p> -It was impossible not to realise that the whole -nation was living on the traditions of their -splendid past. It must be remembered that in the -sixteenth century the Hapsburgs ruled the whole of -Europe with the exception of France, England, -Russia, and the Scandinavian countries. For -centuries after Charlemagne assumed the Imperial -Crown there had been only one Emperor in Europe, -the "Holy Roman Emperor," the "Heiliger Römischer -Kaiser," the fiction being, of course, that he -was the descendant of the Cæsars. The word "Kaiser" -is only the German variant of Cæsar. France -and England had always consistently refused to -acknowledge the overlordship of the Emperor, but -the prestige of the title in German-speaking lands -was immense, though the Holy Roman Empire -itself was a mere simulacrum of power. In theory -the Emperor was elected; in practice the title came -to be a hereditary appanage of the proud Hapsburgs. -It was, I think, Talleyrand who said "L'Autrice -a la Fächeuse habitude d'être toujours battue," -and this was absolutely true. Austria was defeated -with unfailing regularity in almost every campaign, -and the Hapsburgs saw their immense dominions -gradually slipping from their grasp. It was on -May 14, 1804, that Napoleon was crowned Emperor -of the French in Paris, and Francis II, the last of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P51"></a>51}</span> -the Holy Roman Emperors, was fully aware that -Napoleon's next move would be to supplant him and -get himself elected as "Roman Emperor." This -Napoleon would have been able to achieve, as he had -bribed the Electors of Bavaria, Württemberg, and -Saxony by creating them kings. For once a -Hapsburg acted with promptitude. On August 11, 1804, -Francis proclaimed himself hereditary Emperor -of Austria, and two years later he abolished the title -of Holy Roman Emperor. The Empire, after a -thousand years of existence, flickered out ingloriously -in 1806. The pride of the Hapsburgs had received -a hundred years previously a rude shock. -Peter the Great, after consolidating Russia, -abolished the title of Tsar of Muscovy, and proclaimed -himself Emperor of All the Russias; purposely -using the same term "Imperator" as that employed -by the Roman Emperor, and thus putting himself -on an equality with him. -</p> - -<p> -I know by experience that it is impossible to din -into the heads of those unfamiliar with Russia that -since Peter the Great's time there has never been -a Tsar. The words "Tsar," "Tsarina," "Cesarevitch," -beloved of journalists, exist only in their -imagination; they are never heard in Russia. The -Russians termed their Emperor "Gosudar Imperator," -using either or both of the words. Empress -is "Imperatritza"; Heir Apparent "Nadslyédnik." If -you mentioned the words "Tsar" or -"Tsarina" to any ordinary Russian peasant, I -doubt if he would understand you, but I am well -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P52"></a>52}</span> -aware that it is no use repeating this, the other -idea is too firmly ingrained. The Hapsburgs had -yet another bitter pill to swallow. Down to the -middle of the nineteenth century the ancient -prestige of the title Kaiser and the glamour attached to -it were maintained throughout the Germanic -Confederation, but in 1871 a second brand-new Kaiser -arose on the banks of the Spree, and the Hapsburgs -were shorn of their long monopoly. -</p> - -<p> -Franz Josef of Austria must have rued the day -when Sigismund sold the sandy Mark of Brandenburg -to Frederick Count of Hohenzollern in 1415, -and regretted the acquiescence in 1701 of his direct -ancestor, the Emperor Leopold I, in the Elector -of Brandenburg's request that he might assume the -title of King of Prussia. The Hohenzollerns were -ever a grasping race. I think that it was Louis -XIV of France who, whilst officially recognising -the new King of Prussia, refused to speak of him as -such, and always alluded to him as "Monsieur le -Marquis de Brandenbourg." -</p> - -<p> -No wonder that the feeling of bitterness against -Prussia amongst the upper classes of Austria was -very acute in the "'seventies." The events of 1866 -were still too recent to have been forgotten. In my -time the great Austrian ladies affected the broadest -Vienna popular dialect, probably to emphasise the -fact that they were not Prussians. Thus the -sentence "ein Glas Wasser, bitte," became, written in -phonetic English, "a' Glawss Vawsser beet." I -myself was much rallied on my pedantic -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P53"></a>53}</span> -North-German pronunciation, and had in self-defence to -adopt unfamiliar Austrian equivalents for many -words. -</p> - -<p> -The curious international families which seemed -to abound in Vienna always puzzled me. Thus the -princes d'Aremberg are Belgians, but there was one -Prince d'Aremberg in the Austrian service, whilst -his brother was in the Prussian Diplomatic Service, -the remainder of the family being Belgians. There -were, in the same way, many German-speaking -Pourtales in Berlin in the German service, and -more French-speaking ones in Paris in the French -service. The Duc de Croy was both a Belgian and -an Austrian subject. The Croys are one of the -oldest families in Europe, and are <i>ebenbürtig</i> -("born on an equality") with all the German -Royalties. They therefore show no signs of respect -to Archdukes and Archduchesses when they meet -them. Although I cannot vouch personally for -them, never having myself seen them, I am told -that there are two pictures in the Croy Palace at -Brussels which reach the apogee of family pride. -The first depicts Noah embarking on his ark. -Although presumably anxious about the comfort of the -extensive live-stock he has on board, Noah finds -time to give a few parting instructions to his sons. -On what is technically called a "bladder" issuing -from his mouth are the words, "And whatever you -do, don't forget to bring with you the family papers -of the Croys." ("Et surtout ayez soin de ne pas -oublier les papiers de la Maison de Croy!") The -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P54"></a>54}</span> -other picture represents the Madonna and Child, -with the then Duke of Croy kneeling in adoration -before them. Out of the Virgin Mary's mouth -comes a "bladder" with the words "But please -put on your hat, dear cousin." ("Mais couvrez vous -donc, cher cousin.") -</p> - -<p> -The whole of Viennese life is regulated by one -exceedingly tiresome custom. After 10 or 10.15 -p.m. the hall porter (known in Vienna as the -"House-master") of every house in the city has -the right of levying a small toll of threepence on -each person entering or leaving the house. The -whole life of the Vienna bourgeois is spent in -trying to escape this tax, known as -"Schlüssel-Geld." The theatres commence accordingly at -6 p.m. or 6.30, which entails dining about 5 p.m. -A typical Viennese middle-class family will hurry -out in the middle of the last act and scurry home -breathlessly, as the fatal hour approaches. Arrived -safely in their flat, in the last stages of exhaustion, -they say triumphantly to each other. "We have -missed the end of the play, and we are rather out -of breath, but never mind, we have escaped the -'Schlüssel-Geld,' and as we are four, that makes -a whole shilling saved!" -</p> - -<p> -An equally irritating custom is the one that -ordains that in restaurants three waiters must be -tipped in certain fixed proportions. The -"Piccolo," who brings the wine and bread, receives -one quarter of the tip; the "Speisetrager," who -brings the actual food, gets one half; the "Zahlkellner," -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P55"></a>55}</span> -who brings the bill, gets one quarter. -All these must be given separately, so not only -does it entail a hideous amount of mental -arithmetic, but it also necessitates the perpetual -carrying about of pocketfuls of small change. -</p> - -<p> -The Vienna restaurants were quite excellent, -with a local cuisine of extraordinary succulence, -and more extraordinary names. A universal -Austrian custom, not only in restaurants but in -private houses as well, is to serve a glass of the -delicious light Vienna beer with the soup. Even -at State dinners at the Hof-Burg, a glass of beer -was always offered with the soup. The red wine, -Voslauer, grown in the immediate vicinity of the -city, is so good, and has such a distinctive flavour, -that I wonder it has never been exported. The -restaurants naturally suggest the matchless -Viennese orchestras. They were a source of -never-ending delight to me. The distinction they -manage to give to quite commonplace little airs -is extraordinary. The popular songs, "Wiener-Couplets," -melodious, airy nothings, little light -soap-bubbles of tunes, are one of the distinctive -features of Vienna. Played by an Austrian band -as only an Austrian band can play them, with -astonishing vim and fire, and supremely dainty -execution, these little fragile melodies are quite -charming and irresistibly attractive. We live in -a progressive age. In the place of these Austrian -bands with their finished execution and consummately -musicianly feeling, the twentieth century -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P56"></a>56}</span> -has invented the Jazz band with its ear-splitting, -chaotic din. -</p> - -<p> -There is a place in Vienna known as the -Heiden-Schuss, or "Shooting of the heathens." -The origin of this is quite interesting. -</p> - -<p> -In 1683 the Turks invaded Hungary, and, -completely overrunning the country, reached -Vienna, to which they laid siege, for the second -time in its history. Incidentally, they nearly -succeeded in capturing it. During the siege bakers' -apprentices were at work one night in underground -bakehouses, preparing the bread for next day's -consumption. The lads heard a rhythmic "thump, -thump, thump," and were much puzzled by it. Two -of the apprentices, more intelligent than the rest, -guessed that the Turks were driving a mine, and -ran off to the Commandant of Vienna with their -news. They saw the principal engineer officer and -told him of their discovery. He accompanied them -back to the underground bakehouse, and at once -determined that the boys were right. Having got -the direction from the sound, the Austrians drove a -second tunnel, and exploded a powerful counter-mine. -Great numbers of Turks were killed, and -the siege was temporarily raised. On September 12 -of the same year (1683) John Sobieski, King of -Poland, utterly routed the Turks, drove them -back into their own country, and Vienna was -saved. As a reward for the intelligence shown by -the baker-boys, they were granted the privilege -of making and selling a rich kind of roll (into the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P57"></a>57}</span> -composition of which butter entered largely) in -the shape of the Turkish emblem, the crescent. -These rolls became enormously popular amongst -the Viennese, who called them <i>Kipfeln</i>. When -Marie Antoinette married Louis XVI of France, -she missed her Kipfel, and sent to Vienna for an -Austrian baker to teach his Paris <i>confrères</i> the -art of making them. These rolls, which retained -their original shape, became as popular in Paris -as they had been in Vienna, and were known as -<i>Croissants</i>, and that is the reason why one of the -rolls which are brought you with your morning -coffee in Paris will be baked in the form of a -crescent. -</p> - -<p> -The extraordinary number of good-looking -women, of all classes to be seen in the streets of -Vienna was most striking, especially after Berlin, -where a lower standard of feminine beauty -prevailed. Particularly noticeable were the -admirable figures with which most Austrian women are -endowed. In the far-off "'seventies" ladies did -not huddle themselves into a shapeless mass of -abbreviated oddments of material—they dressed, -and their clothes fitted them; and a woman on -whom Nature (or Art) had bestowed a good figure -was able to display her gifts to the world. In -the same way, Fashion did not compel a pretty -girl to smother up her features in unbecoming -tangles of tortured hair. The usual fault of -Austrian faces is their breadth across the cheek-bones; -the Viennese too have a decided tendency -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P58"></a>58}</span> -to <i>embonpoint</i>, but in youth these defects are not -accentuated. Amongst the Austrian aristocracy -the great beauty of the girls was very noticeable, -as was their height, in marked contrast to the -short stature of most of the men. I have always -heard that one of the first outward signs of the -decadence of a race is that the girls grow taller, -whilst the men get shorter. -</p> - -<p> -The Vienna theatres are justly celebrated. At -the Hof-Burg Theatre may be seen the most -finished acting on the German stage. The Burg -varied its programme almost nightly, and it was -an amusing sight to see the troops of liveried -footmen inquiring at the box-office, on behalf of -their mistresses, whether the play to be given -that night was or was not a <i>Comtessen-Stück</i>, <i>i.e.</i>, -a play fit for young girls to see. The box-keeper -always gave a plain "Yes" or "No" in reply. -After Charles Garnier's super-ornate pile in Paris, -the Vienna Opera-house is the finest in Europe, -and the musical standard reaches the highest -possible level, completely eclipsing Paris in that -respect. In the "'seventies" Johann Strauss's -delightful comic operas still retained their vogue. -Bubbling over with merriment, full of delicious -ear-tickling melodies, and with a "go" and an -irresistible intoxication about them that no -French composer has ever succeeded in emulating, -these operettas, "Die Fledermaus," "Prinz -Methusalem," and "La Reine Indigo," would -well stand revival. When the "Fledermaus" -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P59"></a>59}</span> -was revived in London some ten years ago it ran, -if my memory serves me right, for nearly a year. -Occasionally Strauss himself conducted one of his -own operettas; then the orchestra, responding to -his magical baton, played like very demons. -Strauss had one peculiarity. Should he be -dissatisfied with the vim the orchestra put into one -of his favourite numbers, he would snatch the -instrument from the first violin and play it himself. -Then the orchestra answered like one man, and -one left the theatre with the entrancing strains still -tingling in one's ears. -</p> - -<p> -The family houses of most of the Austrian -nobility were in the Inner Town, the old walled city, -where space was very limited. These fine old -houses, built for the greater part in the Italian -baroque style, though splendid for entertaining, -were almost pitch dark and very airless in the -daytime. Judging, too, from the awful smells in -them, they must have been singularly insanitary -dwellings. The Lobkowitz Palace, afterwards the -French Embassy, was so dark by day that artificial -light had always to be used. In the great -seventeenth century ball-room of the Lobkowitz -Palace there was a railed off oak-panelled alcove -containing a bust of Beethoven, an oak table, and -three chairs. It was in that alcove, and at that -table, that Beethoven, when librarian to Prince -Lobkowitz, composed some of his greatest -works. -</p> - -<p> -Our own Embassy in the Metternichgasse, built -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P60"></a>60}</span> -by the British Government, was rather cramped -and could in no way compare with the Berlin -house. -</p> - -<p> -I remember well a ball given by Prince S——, -head of one of the greatest Austrian families, in -his fine but extremely dark house in the Inner -Town. It was Prince S——'s custom on these -occasions to have three hundred young peasants -sent up from his country estates, and to have -them all thrust into the family livery. These -bucolic youths, looking very sheepish in their -unfamiliar plush breeches and stockings, with their -unkempt heads powdered, and with swords at -their sides, stood motionless on every step of the -staircase. I counted one hundred of these rustic -retainers on the staircase alone. They would have -looked better had their liveries occasionally fitted -them. The ball-room at Prince S——'s was hung -with splendid Brussels seventeenth century tapestry -framed in mahogany panels, heavily carved and -gilt. I have never seen this combination of -mahogany, gilding, and tapestry anywhere else. It -was wonderfully decorative, and with the elaborate -painted ceiling made a fine setting for an -entertainment. It was a real pleasure to see how -whole-heartedly the Austrians threw themselves into the -dancing. I think they all managed to retain a -child's power of enjoyment, and they never -detracted from this by any unnecessary brainwork. -Still they were delightfully friendly, easy-going -people. A distinctive feature of every Vienna ball -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P61"></a>61}</span> -was the "Comtessen-Zimmer," or room reserved for -girls. At the end of every dance they all trooped -in there, giggling and gossiping, and remained -there till the music for the next dance struck up. -No married woman dared intrude into the -"Comtessen-Zimmer," and I shudder to think of what -would have befallen the rash male who ventured -to cross that jealously-guarded threshold. I -imagine that the charming and beautifully-dressed -Austrian married women welcomed this custom, for -between the dances at all events they could still -hold the field, free from the competition of a -younger and fresher generation. -</p> - -<p> -At Prince S——'s, at midnight, armies of rustic -retainers, in their temporary disguise, brought -battalions of supper tables into the ball-room, and -all the guests sat down to a hot supper at the -same time. As an instance of how Austrians -blended simplicity with a great love of externals, -I see from my diary that the supper consisted of -bouillon, of plain-boiled carp with horse-radish, -of thick slices of hot roast beef, and a lemon -ice—and nothing else whatever. A sufficiently -substantial repast, but hardly in accordance with -modern ideas as to what a ball-supper should consist -of. The young peasants, considering that it was -their first attempt at waiting, did not break an -undue number of plates; they tripped at times, -though, over their unaccustomed swords, and gaped -vacantly, or would get hitched up with each other, -when more dishes crashed to their doom. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P62"></a>62}</span> -</p> - -<p> -In Vienna there was a great distinction drawn -between a "Court Ball" (Hof-Ball) and a "Ball -at the Court" (Ball bei Hof). To the former -everyone on the Palace list was invited, to the -latter only a few people; and the one was just -as crowded and disagreeable as the other was the -reverse. The great rambling pile of the Hof-Burg -contains some very fine rooms and a marvellous -collection of works of art, and the so-called -"Ceremonial Apartments" are of quite Imperial -magnificence, but the general effect was far less striking -than in Berlin. -</p> - -<p> -In spite of the beauty of the women, the <i>coup -d'oeil</i> was spoilt by the ugly Austrian uniforms. -After the disastrous campaign of 1866, the -traditional white of the Austrian Army was abolished, -and the uniforms were shorn of all unnecessary -trappings. The military tailors had evolved -hideous garments, ugly in colour, unbecoming in cut. -One can only trust that they proved very economical, -but the contrast with the splendid and admirably -made uniforms of the Prussian Army was -very marked. The Hungarian magnates in their -traditional family costumes (from which all -Hussar uniforms are derived) added a note of -gorgeous colour, with their gold-laced tunics and their -many-hued velvet slung-jackets. I remember, on -the occasion of Queen Victoria's Jubilee in 1887, -the astonishment caused by a youthful and -exceedingly good-looking Hungarian who appeared -at Buckingham Palace in skin-tight blue breeches -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P63"></a>63}</span> -lavishly embroidered with gold over the thighs, -entirely gilt Hessian boots to the knee, and a -tight-fitting tunic cut out of a real tiger-skin, fastened -with some two dozen turquoise buttons the size of -five-shilling pieces. When this resplendent youth -reappeared in London ten years later at the -Diamond Jubilee, it was with a tonsured head, and -he was wearing the violet robes of a prelate of the -Roman Church. -</p> - -<p> -As an instance of the inflexibility of the -cast-iron rules of the Hapsburg Court: I may mention -that the beautiful Countess Karolyi, Austrian -Ambassadress in Berlin, was never asked to Court in -Vienna, as she lacked the necessary "sixteen -quarterings." To a non-Austrian mind it seems -illogical that the lovely lady representing Austria in -Berlin should have been thought unfitted for an -invitation from her own Sovereign. -</p> - -<p> -The immense deference paid to the Austrian -Archdukes and Archduchesses was very striking -after the comparatively unceremonious fashion in -which minor German royalties (always excepting -the Emperor and the Crown Prince) were treated -in Berlin. The Archduchesses especially were very -tenacious of their privileges. They never could -forget that they were Hapsburgs, and exacted all -the traditional signs of respect. -</p> - -<p> -The unfortunate Empress Elisabeth, destined -years after to fall under the dagger of an assassin -at Geneva, made but seldom a public appearance -in her husband's dominions. She had an almost -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P64"></a>64}</span> -morbid horror of fulfilling any of the duties of -her position. During my stay in the Austrian -capital I only caught one glimpse of her, driving -through the streets. She was astonishingly -handsome, with coiled masses of dark hair, and a very -youthful and graceful figure, but the face was so -impassive that it produced the effect of a beautiful, -listless mask. The Empress was a superb horse-woman, -and every single time she rode she was -literally sewn into her habit by a tailor, in order -to ensure a perfect fit. -</p> - -<p> -The innumerable cafés of Vienna were crowded -from morning to night. Seeing them crammed -with men in the forenoon, one naturally wondered -how the business of the city was transacted. -Probably, in typical Austrian fashion, these worthy -Viennese left their businesses to take care of -themselves whilst they enjoyed themselves in the cafés. -The super-excellence of the Vienna coffee would -afford a more or less legitimate excuse for this. -Nowhere in the world is such coffee made, and a -"Capuziner," or a "Melange," the latter with -thick whipped cream on the top of it, were indeed -things of joy. -</p> - -<p> -Few capitals are more fortunate in their -environs than Vienna. The beautiful gardens and -park of Schönbrunn Palace have a sort of intimate -charm which is wholly lacking at Versailles. They -are stately, yet do not overwhelm you with -a sense of vast spaces. They are crowned -by a sort of temple, known as the Gloriette, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P65"></a>65}</span> -from which a splendid view is obtained. -</p> - -<p> -In less than three hours from the capital, the -railway climbs 3,000 feet to the Semmering, where -the mountain scenery is really grand. During -the summer months the whole of Vienna empties -itself on to the Semmering and the innumerable -other hill-resorts within easy distance from the -city. -</p> - -<p> -When the time came for my departure, I felt -genuinely sorry at leaving this merry, careless, -music and laughter-loving town, and these genial, -friendly, hospitable incompetents. I feel some -compunction in using this word, as people had been -very good to me. I cannot help feeling, though, -that it is amply warranted. A bracing climate is -doubtless wholesome; but a relaxing one can be -very pleasant for a time. I went back to Berlin -feeling like a boy returning to school after his -holidays. -</p> - -<p> -The Viennese had but little love for their upstart -rival on the Spree. They had invented the name -"Parvenupopolis" for Berlin, and a little popular -song, which I may be forgiven for quoting in the -original German, expressed their sentiments fairly -accurately: -</p> - -<p class="poem"> - Es gibt nur eine Kaiserstadt,<br /> - Es gibt nur ein Wien;<br /> - Es gibt nur ein Raubernest,<br /> - Und das heisst Berlin.<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -I had a Bavarian friend in Berlin. We talked -over the amazing difference in temperament there -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P66"></a>66}</span> -was between the Austrians and the Prussians, and -the curious charm there was about the former, -lacking in intellect though they might be, a charm -wholly lacking in the pushful, practical Prussians. -My friend agreed, but claimed the same attractive -qualities for his own beloved Bavarians; "but," -he added impressively, "mark my words, in twenty -years from now the whole of Germany will be -Prussianised!" ("<i>Ganz Deutschland wird verpreussert -werden</i>") Events have shown how absolutely -correct my Bavarian friend was in his forecast. -</p> - -<p> -In June, 1878, the great Congress for the -settlement of the terms of peace between Russia and -Turkey assembled in Berlin. It was an extraordinarily -interesting occasion, for almost every single -European notability was to be seen in the -German capital. The Russian plenipotentiaries -were the veteran Prince Gortchakoff and Count -Peter Schouvaloff, that most genial <i>faux-bonhomme</i>; -the Turks were championed by Ali Pasha and by -Katheodory Pasha. Great Britain was represented -by Lords Beaconsfield and Salisbury; Austria by -Count Andrassy, the Prime Minister; France by -M. Waddington. In spite of the very large staff -brought out from London by the British -plenipotentiaries, an enormous amount of work fell upon -us at the Embassy. -</p> - -<p> -To a youngster there is something very fascinating -in being regarded as so worthy of confidence -that the most secret details of the great -game of diplomacy were all known to him from -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P67"></a>67}</span> -day to day. A boy of twenty-one feels very proud -of the trust reposed in him, and at being the -repository of such weighty and important secrets. -That is the traditional method of the British -Diplomatic Service. -</p> - -<p> -As all the Embassies gave receptions in honour -of their own plenipotentiaries, we met almost nightly -all the great men of Europe, and had occasional -opportunities for a few words with them. Prince -Gortchakoff, who fancied himself Bismarck's only -rival, was a little, short, tubby man in spectacles; -wholly undistinguished in appearance, and looking -for all the world like an average French provincial -notaire. Count Andrassy, the Hungarian, was a -tall, strikingly handsome man, with an immense -head of hair. To me, he always recalled the leader -of a "Tzigane" orchestra. M. Waddington talked -English like an Englishman, and was so typically -British in appearance that it was almost -impossible to realise that he was a Frenchman. Our -admiration for him was increased when we learnt -that he had rowed in the Cambridge Eight. But -without any question whatever, the personality -which excited the greatest interest at the Berlin -Congress was that of Lord Beaconsfield, the Jew -who by sheer force of intellect had raised himself -from nothing into his present commanding position. -His peculiar, colourless, inscrutable face, -with its sphinx-like impassiveness; the air of -mystery which somehow clung about him; the romantic -story of his career; even the remnants of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P68"></a>68}</span> -dandyism which he still retained in his old age—all these -seemed to whet the insatiable public curiosity about -him. Some enterprising Berlin tradesmen had -brought out fans, with leaves composed of plain -white vellum, designed expressly for the Congress. -Armed with one of these fans, and with pen and -ink, indefatigable feminine autograph-hunters -moved about at these evening receptions, securing -the signatures of the plenipotentiaries on the white -vellum leaves. Many of those fans must still be -in existence, and should prove very interesting -to-day. Bismarck alone invariably refused his -autograph. -</p> - -<p> -At all these gatherings, M. de Blowitz, the then -Paris correspondent of the <i>Times</i>, was much to -the fore. In the "'seventies" the prestige of the -<i>Times</i> on the Continent of Europe was enormous. -In reality the influence of the <i>Times</i> was very -much overrated, since all Continentals persisted in -regarding it as the inspired mouthpiece of the -British Government. Great was the <i>Times</i>, but -greater still was de Blowitz, its prophet. This most -remarkable man was a veritable prince of newspaper -correspondents. There was no move on the -European chess-board of which he was not -cognisant, and as to which he did not keep his paper -well informed, and his information was always -accurate. De Blowitz knew no English, and his -lengthy daily telegrams to the <i>Times</i> were always -written in French and were translated in London. -He was really a Bohemian Jew of the name of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P69"></a>69}</span> -Oppen, and he had bestowed the higher-sounding -name of de Blowitz on himself. He was a very -short, fat little man, with immensely long grey -side-whiskers, and a most consequential manner. -He was a very great personage indeed in official -circles. De Blowitz has in his Memoirs given a -full account of the trick by which he learnt of the -daily proceedings of the Congress and so -transmitted them to his paper. I need not, therefore, -go into details about this; it is enough to say -that a daily exchange of hats, in the lining of the -second of which a summary of the day's deliberations -was concealed, played a great part in it. -</p> - -<p> -When the Treaty had been drawn up in French, -Lord Salisbury rather startled us by saying that -he wished it translated into English and cyphered -to London that very evening <i>in extenso</i>. This -was done to obviate the possibility of the -news-paper correspondents getting a version of the -Treaty through to London before the British -Government had received the actual text. As the -Treaty was what I, in the light of later experiences, -would now describe as of fifteen thousand -words length, this was a sufficiently formidable -undertaking. Fifteen of us sat down to the task -about 6 p.m., and by working at high pressure -we got the translation finished and the last cyphered -sheet sent off to the telegraph office by 5 a.m. The -translation done at such breakneck speed was -possibly a little crude in places. One clause in the -Treaty provided that ships in ballast were to have -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P70"></a>70}</span> -free passage through the Dardanelles. Now the -French for "ships in ballast," is "<i>navires en -lest</i>." The person translating this (who was not a -member of the British Diplomatic Service) rendered -"<i>navires en lest</i>" as "ships in the East," and in -this form it was cyphered to London. As, owing -to the geographical position of the Dardanelles, -any ship approaching them would be, in one sense -of the term, a "ship in the East," there was -considerable perturbation in Downing Street over -this clause, until the mistake was discovered. -</p> - -<p> -Berlin has wonderful natural advantages, considering -that it is situated in a featureless, sandy -plain. In my day it was quite possible to walk -from the Embassy into a real, wild pine-forest, -the Grünewald. The Grünewald, being a Royal -forest, was unbuilt on, and quite unspoilt. It -extended for miles, enclosing many pretty little -lakelets. Now I understand that it has been -invaded by "villa colonies," so its old charm of -wildness must have vanished. The Tiergarten, too, -the park of Berlin, retains in places the look of a -real country wood. It is inadvisable to venture -into the Tiergarten after nightfall, should you -wish to retain possession of your watch, purse, and -other portable property. The sandy nature of the -soil makes it excellent for riding. Within quite -a short distance of the city you can find tracts -of heathery moor, and can get a good gallop almost -anywhere. -</p> - -<p> -There is quite fair partridge-shooting, too, within -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P71"></a>71}</span> -a few miles of Berlin, in the immense potato fields, -though the entire absence of cover in this hedgeless -land makes it very difficult at times to approach -the birds. It is pre-eminently a country for -"driving" partridges, though most Germans prefer the -comparatively easy shots afforded by "walking the -birds up." -</p> - -<p> -Potsdam has had but scant justice done it by -foreigners. The town is almost surrounded by the -river Havel, which here broadens out into a series -of winding, wooded lakes, surrounded by tree-clad -hills. The Potsdam lakes are really charmingly -pretty, and afford an admirable place for rowing -or sailing. Neither of these pursuits seems to -make the least appeal to Germans. The Embassy -kept a small yacht at Potsdam, but she was -practically the only craft then on the lakes. As on -all narrow waters enclosed by wooded hills, the -sailing was very tricky, owing to the constant -shifting of the wind. Should it be blowing fresh, -it was advisable to sail under very light canvas; -and it was always dangerous to haul up the centre-board, -even when "running," as on rounding some -wooded point you would get "taken aback" to a -certainty. Once in the fine open stretch of water -between Wansee and Spandau, you could hoist every -stitch of canvas available, and indulge with impunity -in the most complicated nautical manoeuvres. -Possibly my extreme fondness for the Potsdam lakes -may be due to their extraordinary resemblance to the -lakes at my own Northern country home. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P72"></a>72}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The Embassy also owned a light Thames-built -four-oar. At times a short, thick-set young man -of nineteen pulled bow in our four. The short -young man had a withered arm, and the doctors -hoped that the exercise of rowing might put some -strength into it. He seemed quite a commonplace -young man, yet this short, thick-set youth was -destined less than forty years after to plunge the -world into the greatest calamity it has ever known; -to sacrifice millions and millions of human lives -to his own inordinate ambition; and to descend to -posterity as one of the most sinister characters in -the pages of history. -</p> - -<p> -Moored in the "Jungfernsee," one of the Potsdam -lakes, lay a miniature sailing frigate, a -complete model of a larger craft down to the smallest -details. This toy frigate had been a present from -King William IV of England to the then King -of Prussia. The little frigate had been built in -London, and though of only 30-tons burden, had -been sailed down the Thames, across the North -Sea, and up the Elbe and Havel to Potsdam, by -a British naval officer. A pretty bit of seamanship! -I have always heard that it was the sight of this -toy frigate, lying on the placid lake at Potsdam, -that first inspired William of Hohenzollern with -the idea of building a gigantic navy. -</p> - -<p> -The whole history of the world might have been -changed by an incident which occurred on these -same Potsdam lakes in 1880. I have already said -that William of Hohenzollern, then only Prince -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P73"></a>73}</span> -William, pulled at times in our Embassy four, in -the hope that it might strengthen his withered arm. -He was very anxious to see if he could learn to -scull, in spite of his physical defect, and asked the -Ambassadress, Lady Ampthill, whether she would -herself undertake to coach him. Lady Ampthill -consented, and met Prince William next day at -the landing-stage with a light Thames-built skiff, -belonging to the Embassy. Lady Ampthill, with -the caution of one used to light boats, got in -carefully, made her way aft, and grasped the -yoke-lines. She then explained to Prince William that -this was not a heavy boat such as he had been -accustomed to, that he must exercise extreme care, -and in getting in must tread exactly in the centre -of the boat. William of Hohenzollern, who had -never taken advice from anyone in his life, and -was always convinced that he himself knew best, -responded by jumping into the boat from the -landing-stage, capsizing it immediately, and -throwing himself and Lady Ampthill into the water. -Prince William, owing to his malformation, was -unable to swim one stroke, but help was at hand. -Two of the Secretaries of the British Embassy had -witnessed the accident, and rushed up to aid. The -so-called "Naval Station" was close by, where -the Emperor's Potsdam yacht lay, a most -singularly shabby old paddle-boat. Some German -sailors from the "Naval Post" heard the shouting and -ran up, and a moist, and we will trust a chastened -William and a dripping Ambassadress were -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P74"></a>74}</span> -eventually rescued from the lake. Otherwise William -of Hohenzollern might have ended his life in the -"Jungfernsee" at Potsdam that day, and millions -of other men would have been permitted to live -out their allotted span of existence. -</p> - -<p> -Potsdam itself is quite a pleasing town, with a -half-Dutch, half-Italian physiognomy. Both were -deliberately borrowed; the first by Frederick -William I, who constructed the tree-lined canals which -give Potsdam its half-Batavian aspect; the second -by Frederick the Great, who fronted Teutonic -dwellings with façades copied from Italy to add -dignity to the town. It must in justice be added -that both are quite successful, though Potsdam, -like most other things connected with the -Hohenzollerns, has only a couple of hundred years' -tradition behind it. The square opposite the railway -really does recall Italy. The collection of palaces -at Potsdam is bewildering. Of these, three are of -the first rank: the Town Palace, Sans-souci, and -the great pile of the "New Palace." Either Frederick -the Great was very fortunate in his architects, -or else he chose them with great discrimination. -The Town Palace, even in my time but seldom -inhabited, is very fine in the finished details of its -decoration. Sans-souci is an absolute gem; its rococo -style may be a little over-elaborate, but it produces -the effect of a finished, complete whole, in the most -admirable taste; even though the exuberant imagination -of the eighteenth century has been allowed -to run riot in it. The gardens of Sans-souci, too, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P75"></a>75}</span> -are most attractive. The immense red-brick -building of the New Palace was erected by Frederick -the Great during the Seven Years' War, out of -sheer bravado. He was anxious to impress on his -enemies the fact that his financial resources were -not yet exhausted. Considering that he already -possessed two stately palaces within a mile of it, -the New Palace may be looked upon as distinctly -a work of supererogation, also as an appalling -waste of money. As a piece of architecture, it is -distinctly a success. This list does not, however, -nearly exhaust the palatial resources of Potsdam. -The eighteenth century had contributed its -successes; it remained for the nineteenth to add its -failures. Babelsberg, the old Emperor William's -favourite residence, was an awful example of a -ginger-bread pseudo-Gothic castle. The Marble -Palace on the so-called "Holy Lake" was a dull, -unimaginative building; and the "Red Prince's" -house at Glienicke was frankly terrible. The main -features of this place was an avenue of huge -cast-iron gilded lions. These golden lions were such -a blot on an otherwise charming landscape that -one felt relieved by recalling that the apparently -ineradicable tendency of the children of Israel to -erect Golden Calves at various places in olden -days had always been severely discountenanced. -</p> - -<p> -In spite of the carpenter-Gothic of Babelsberg, -and of the pinchbeck golden lions of Glienicke, -Potsdam will remain in my mind, to the end of -my life, associated with memories of fresh breezes -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P76"></a>76}</span> -and bellying sails; of placid lakes and swift-gliding -keels responding to the straining muscles of back -and legs; a place of verdant hills dipping into -clear waters; of limbs joyously cleaving those clear -waters with all the exultation of the swimmer; a -place of rest and peace, with every fibre in one's -being rejoicing in being away, for the time being, -from crowded cities and stifling streets, in the free -air amidst woods, waters, and gently-swelling, -tree-clad heights. -</p> - -<p> -A year later, I was notified that I was transferred -to Petrograd, then of course still known as -St. Petersburg. This was in accordance with the -dearest wish of my heart. Ever since my childhood's -days I had been filled with an intense -desire to go to Russia. Like most people -unacquainted with the country, I had formed the most -grotesquely incorrect mental pictures of Russia. -I imagined it a vast Empire of undreamed of -magnificence, pleasantly tempered with relics of -barbarism; and all these glittering splendours were -enveloped in the snow and ice of a semi-Arctic -climate, which gave additional piquancy to their -glories. I pictured huge tractless forests, their -dark expanse only broken by the shimmering golden -domes of the Russian churches. I fancied this -glamour-land peopled by a species of transported -French, full of culture, and all of them polyglot, -more brilliant and infinitely more intellectual than -their West European prototypes. I imagined this -hyperborean paradise served by a race of super-astute -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P77"></a>77}</span> -diplomatists and officials, with whom we poor -Westerners could not hope to contend, and by -Generals whom no one could withstand. The -evident awe with which Germans envisaged their -Eastern neighbours strengthened this idea, and both in -England and in France I had heard quite responsible -persons gloomily predict, after contemplating -the map, that the Northern Colossus was fatally -destined at some time to absorb the whole of the -rest of Europe. -</p> - -<p> -Apart then from its own intrinsic attraction, I -used to gaze at the map of Russia with some such -feelings as, I imagine, the early Christians -experienced when, on their Sunday walks in Rome, -they went to look at the lions in their dens in the -circus, and speculated as to their own sensations -when, as seemed but too probable, they might have -to meet these interesting quadrupeds on the floor -of the arena, in a brief, exciting, but definitely final -encounter. -</p> - -<p> -Everything I had seen or heard about this -mysterious land had enhanced its glamour. The -hair-raising rumours which reached Berlin as to -revolutionary plots and counter-plots; the appalling -stories one heard about the terrible secret police; -the atmosphere of intrigue which seemed indigenous -to the place—all added to its fascinations. Even -the externals were attractive. I had attended -weddings and funeral services at the chapel of the -Russian Embassy. Here every detail was exotic, -and utterly dissimilar to anything in one's previous -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P78"></a>78}</span> -experience. The absence of seats, organ, or pulpit -in the chapel itself; the elaborate Byzantine decorations -of the building; the exquisitely beautiful but -quite unfamiliar singing; the long-bearded priests -in their archaic vestments of unaccustomed golden -brocades—everything struck a novel note. It all -came from a world apart, centuries removed from -the prosaic routine of Western Europe. -</p> - -<p> -Even quite minor details, such as the curiously -sumptuous Russian national dresses of the ladies -of the Embassy at Court functions, the visits to -Berlin of the Russian ballets and troupes of -Russian singing gipsies, had all the same stamp of -strong racial individuality, of something -temperamentally different from all we had been -accustomed to. -</p> - -<p> -I was overjoyed at the prospect of seeing for -myself at last this land of mingled splendour and -barbarism, this country which had retained its -traditional racial characteristics in spite of the -influences of nineteenth century drab uniformity of -type. -</p> - -<p> -As the Petrograd Embassy was short-handed at -the time, it was settled that I should postpone my -leave for some months and proceed to Russia -without delay. -</p> - -<p> -The Crown Prince and Crown Princess, who had -been exceedingly kind to me during my stay in -Berlin, were good enough to ask me to the New -Palace at Potsdam for one night, to take leave of -them. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P79"></a>79}</span> -</p> - -<p> -I had never before had an opportunity of going -all over the New Palace. I thought it wonderfully -fine, though quite French in feeling. The rather -faded appearance of some of the rooms increased -their look of dignity. It was not of yesterday. -The great "Shell Hall," or "Muschel-Saal," much -admired of Prussians, is frankly horrible; one of -the unfortunate aberrations of eighteenth century -taste of which several examples occur in English -country-houses of the same date. -</p> - -<p> -My own bedroom was charming; of the purest -Louis XV, with apple-green polished panelling -and heavily silvered mouldings and mirrors. -</p> - -<p> -Nothing could be more delightful than the Crown -Prince's manner on occasions such as this. The -short-lived Emperor Frederick had the knack of -blending absolute simplicity with great dignity, as -had the Empress Frederick. For the curious in -such matters, and as an instance of the traditional -frugality of the Prussian Court, I may add that -supper that evening, at which only the Crown -Prince and Princess, the equerry and lady-in-waiting, -and myself were present, consisted solely of -curds and whey, veal cutlets, and a rice pudding. -Nothing else whatever. We sat afterwards in a -very stately, lofty, thoroughly French room. The -Crown Prince, the equerry, and myself drank beer, -whilst the Prince smoked his long pipe. It seemed -incongruous to drink beer amid such absolutely -French surroundings. I noticed that the Crown -Princess always laid down her needlework to refill -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P80"></a>80}</span> -her husband's pipe and to bring him a fresh -tankard of beer. The "Kronprinzliches Paar," as a -German would have described them, were both -perfectly charming in their conversation with a dull, -uninteresting youth of twenty-one. They each had -marvellous memories, and recalled many trivial -half-forgotten details about my own family. That -evening in the friendly atmosphere of the great, -dimly-lit room in the New Palace at Potsdam will -always live in my memory. -</p> - -<p> -Two days afterwards I drove through the trim, -prosaic, well-ordered, stuccoed streets of Berlin -to the Eastern Station; for me, the gateway to -the land of my desires, vast, mysterious Russia. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap03"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P81"></a>81}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER III -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -The Russian frontier—Frontier police—Disappointment at -aspect of Petrograd—Lord and Lady Dufferin—The British -Embassy—St. Isaac's Cathedral—Beauty of Russian -Church-music—The Russian language—The delightful -"Blue-stockings" of Petrograd—Princess Chateau—Pleasant -Russian Society—The Secret Police—The Countess's -hurried journey—The Yacht Club—Russians really -Orientals—Their limitations—The "Intelligenzia"—My -Nihilist friends—Their lack of constructive power—Easter Mass -at St. Isaac's—Two comical incidents—The Easter -supper—The red-bearded young priest—An Empire built on -shifting sand. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -Petrograd is 1,050 miles from Berlin, and forty -years ago the fastest trains took forty-five hours -to cover the distance between the two capitals. In -later years the "Nord-Express" accomplishing the -journey in twenty-nine hours. -</p> - -<p> -Rolling through the flat fertile plains of East -Prussia, with their neat, prosperous villages and -picturesque black-and-white farms, the surroundings -had such a commonplace air that it was difficult to -realise that one was approaching the very threshold -of the great, mysterious Northern Empire. -</p> - -<p> -Eydkuhnen, the last Prussian station, was as -other Prussian stations, built of trim red brick, -neat, practical, and very ugly; with crowds of -red-faced, amply-paunched officials, buttoned into the -tightest of uniforms, perpetually saluting each -other. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P82"></a>82}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Wierjbolovo, or Wirballen Station as the -Germans call it, a huge white building, was plainly -visible only a third of a mile away. At Wirballen -the German train would stop, for whereas the -German railways are built to the standard -European gauge of 4 feet 8½ inches, the Russian lines -were laid to a gauge of 5 feet 1 inch. -</p> - -<p> -This gauge had been deliberately chosen to -prevent the invasion of Russia by her Western -neighbour. This was to prove an absolutely illusory -safeguard, for, as events have shown, nothing is -easier than to <i>narrow</i> a railway track. To broaden -it is often quite impossible. The cunning little -Japs found this out during the Russo-Japanese -War. They narrowed the broad Russian lines to -their own gauge of 3 feet 6 inches, <i>and then sawed -off the ends of the sleepers</i> with portable circular -saws, thus making it impossible for the Russians -to relay the rails on the broad gauge. I believe -that the Germans adopted the same device more -recently. -</p> - -<p> -I think at only one other spot in the world does -a short quarter of a mile result in such amazing -differences in externals as does that little piece of -line between Eydkuhnen and Wirballen; and that -is at Linea, the first Spanish village out of Gibraltar. -</p> - -<p> -Leaving the prim and starched orderliness of -Gibraltar, with its thick coating of British veneer, -its tidy streets and buildings enlivened with the -scarlet tunics of Mr. Thomas Atkins and his brethren, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P83"></a>83}</span> -you traverse the "Neutral Ground" to an -iron railing, and literally pass into Spain through -an iron gate. The contrast is extraordinary. It -would be unfair to select Linea as a typical -Spanish village; it is ugly, and lacks the picturesque -features of the ordinary Andalusian village; it is -also unquestionably very dirty, and very tumble-down. -Between Eydkuhnen and Wirballen the -contrast is just as marked. As the German train -stopped, hosts of bearded, shaggy-headed individuals -in high boots and long white aprons (surely -a curious article of equipment for a railway -porter) swooped down upon the hand-baggage; I -handed my passport to a gendarme (a term confined -in Russia to frontier and railway police) and -passed through an iron gate into Russia. -</p> - -<p> -Russia in this case was represented by a gigantic -whitewashed hall, ambitious originally in design and -decoration, but, like most things in Russia, showing -traces of neglect and lack of cleanliness. The first -exotic note was struck by a full-length, life-size ikon -of the Saviour, in a solid silver frame, at the end -of the hall. All my Russian fellow-travellers -devoutly crossed themselves before this ikon, purchased -candles at an adjoining stall, and fixed them in -the silver holders before the ikon. -</p> - -<p> -Behind the line of tables serving for the Customs -examinations was a railed-off space, containing -many desks under green-shaded lamps. Here some -fifteen green-coated men whispered mysteriously to -each other, referring continually to huge registers. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P84"></a>84}</span> -I felt a thrill creep down my back; here I found -myself at last face to face with the omnipotent -Russian police. The bespectacled green-coated men -scrutinised passports intently, conferred amongst -themselves in whispers under the green-shaded -lamps, and hunted ominously through the big -registers. For the first time I became unpleasantly -conscious of the existence of such places as the -Fortress of St. Peter and St. Paul, and of a -country called Siberia. I speculated as to whether the -drawbacks of the Siberian climate had not been -exaggerated, should one be compelled to make a -possibly prolonged sojourn in that genial land. -Above all, I was immensely impressed with the -lynx-eyed vigilance and feverish activity of these -green-coated guardians of the Russian frontier. -From my subsequent knowledge of the ways of -Russian officials, I should gather that all this -feverish activity began one minute after the whistle -announced the approach of the Berlin train, and -ceased precisely one minute after the Petrograd -train had pulled out, and that never, by any chance, -did the frontier police succeed in stopping the -entry of any really dangerous conspirator. -</p> - -<p> -Diplomats with official passports are exempt from -Customs formalities, so I passed on to the -platform, thick with pungent wood-smoke, where the -huge blue-painted Russian carriages smoked like -volcanoes from their heating apparatus, and the -gigantic wood-burning engine (built in Germany) -vomited dense clouds from its funnel, crowned with -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P85"></a>85}</span> -a spark-arrester shaped like a mammoth tea urn, -or a giant's soup tureen. Everything in this -country seemed on a large scale. -</p> - -<p> -In the gaunt, bare, whitewashed restaurant (these -three epithets are applicable to almost every public -room in Russia) with its great porcelain stove, and -red lamps burning before gilded ikons, I first made -the acquaintance of fresh caviar and raw herrings, -of the national cabbage soup, or "shtchee," of roast -ryabehiks and salted cucumbers, all destined to -become very familiar. Railway restaurants in -Russia are almost invariably quite excellent. -</p> - -<p> -And so the train clanked out through the night, -into the depths of this mysterious glamour-land. -</p> - -<p> -The railway from the frontier to Petrograd runs -for 550 miles through an unbroken stretch of -interminable dreary swamp and forest, such as would -in Canada be termed "muskag," with here and -there a poor attempt at cultivation in some -clearing, set about with wretched little wooden huts. -After a twenty-four hours' run, without any -preliminary warning whatever in the shape of -suburbs, the train emerges from the forest into a -huge city, with tramcars rolling in all directions, -and the great golden dome of St. Isaac's blazing -like a sun against the murky sky. -</p> - -<p> -I had pictured Petrograd to myself as a second -Paris; a city glittering with light and colour, but -conceived on an infinitely more grandiose scale -than the French capital. -</p> - -<p> -We emerged from the station into an immensely -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P86"></a>86}</span> -broad street bordered by shabbily-pretentious -buildings all showing signs of neglect. The atrociously -uneven pavements, the general untidiness, the broad -thoroughfare empty except for a lumbering cart -or two, the absence of foot-passengers, and the low -cotton-wool sky, all gave an effect of unutterable -dreariness. And this was the golden city of my -dreams! this place of leprous-fronted houses, of vast -open spaces full of drifting snowflakes, and of an -immense emptiness. I never was so disappointed -in my life. The gilt and coloured domes of the -Orthodox churches, the sheepskin-clad, red-shirted -moujiks, the occasional swift-trotting Russian -carriages, with their bearded and padded coachmen, -were the only local touches that redeemed the streets -from the absolute commonplace. The Russian -lettering over the shops, which then conveyed nothing -whatever to me, suggested that the alphabet, having -followed the national custom and got drunk, had -hastily re-affixed itself to the houses upside down. -Although as the years went on I grew quite -attached to Petrograd, I could never rid myself of -this impression of its immense dreariness. This -was due to several causes. There are hardly any -stone buildings in the city, everything is of brick -plastered over. Owing to climatic reasons the houses -are not painted, but are daubed with colour-wash. -The successive coats of colour-wash clog all the -architectural features, and give the buildings a -shabby look, added to which the wash flakes off -under the winter snows. There is a natural craving -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P87"></a>87}</span> -in human nature for colour, and in a country -wrapped in snow for at least four months in the -year this craving finds expression in painting the -roofs red, and in besmearing the houses with crude -shades of red, blue, green, and yellow. The result -is not a happy one. Again, owing to the intense -cold, the shop-windows are all very small, and -there is but little display in them. Streets and -shops were alike very dimly lighted in my day, and -as there is an entire absence of cafés in Petrograd, -there is none of the usual glitter and glare of these -places to brighten up the streets. The theatres make -no display of lights, so it is not surprising that the -general effect of the city is one of intense gloom. -The very low, murky winter sky added to this -effect of depression. Peter the Great had planned -his new capital on such a gigantic scale that there -were not enough inhabitants to fill its vast spaces. -The conceptions were magnificent; the results -disappointing. Nothing grander could be imagined -than the design of the immense <i>place</i> opposite the -Winter Palace, with Alexander I's great granite -monolith towering in the midst of it, and the -imposing semicircular sweep of Government Offices of -uniform design enclosing it, pierced in the centre -by a monumental triumphal arch crowned with a -bronze quadriga. The whole effect of this was spoilt -by the hideous crude shade of red with which the -buildings were daubed, by the general untidiness, -and by the broken, uneven pavement; added to which -this huge area was usually untenanted, except by a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P88"></a>88}</span> -lumbering cart or two, by a solitary stray -"istvoschik," and an occasional muffled-up pedestrian. -The Petrograd of reality was indeed very different -from the sumptuous city of my dreams. -</p> - -<p> -For the second time I was extraordinarily lucky -in my Chief. Our relations with Russia had, -during the "'seventies," been strained almost to the -breaking point. War had on several occasions seemed -almost inevitable between the two countries. -</p> - -<p> -Russians, naturally enough, had shown their feelings -of hostility to their potential enemies by -practically boycotting the entire British Embassy. The -English Government had then made a very wise -choice, and had appointed to the Petrograd Embassy -the one man capable of smoothing these troubled -relations. The late Lord Dufferin was not then a -diplomat by profession. He had just completed his -term of office as Governor-General of Canada, where, -as in every position he had previously occupied, he -had been extraordinarily successful. Lord Dufferin -had an inexhaustible fund of patience, blended with -the most perfect tact; he had a charm of manner no -human being could resist; but under it all lay an -inflexible will. No man ever understood better the -use of the iron hand under the velvet glove, and in -a twelvemonth from the date of his arrival in -Petrograd he had succeeded not only in gaining the -confidence of official Russia, but also in re-establishing -the most cordial relations with Russian society. In -this he was very ably seconded by Lady Dufferin, -who combined a perfectly natural manner with -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P89"></a>89}</span> -quiet dignity and a curious individual charm. Both -Lord and Lady Dufferin enjoyed dancing, skating, -and tobagganing as wholeheartedly as though they -were children. -</p> - -<p> -Our Petrograd Embassy was a fine old house, -with a pleasant intimate character about it lacking -in the more ornate building at Berlin. It contained -a really beautiful snow-white ball-room, and all the -windows fronted the broad, swift-flowing Neva, with -the exquisitely graceful slender gilded spire of the -Fortress Church, towering three hundred feet aloft, -opposite them. We had a very fine collection of -silver plate at the Embassy. This plate, valued at -£30,000, was the property of our Government, and -had been sent out sixty years previously by George -IV, who understood the importance attached by -Russians to externals. We had also a small set, just -sufficient for two persons, of real gold plates. These -solid gold plates were only used by the Emperor -and Empress on the very rare occasions when they -honoured the Embassy with their presence. I -wonder what has happened to that gold service now! -</p> - -<p> -Owing to the constant tension of the relations -between Great Britain and Russia, our work at the -Petrograd Embassy was very heavy indeed at that -time. We were frequently kept up till 2 a.m. in -the Chancery, cyphering telegrams. All important -written despatches between London and Petrograd -either way were sent by Queen's Messenger open to -Berlin, "under Flying Seal," as it is termed. The -Berlin Embassy was thus kept constantly posted as -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P90"></a>90}</span> -to Russian affairs. After reading our open -despatches, both to and from London, the Berlin -Embassy would seal them up in a special way. We also -got duplicates, in cypher, of all telegrams received -in London the previous day from the Paris, -Vienna, Berlin, and Constantinople Embassies which -bore in any way on Russia or the Eastern Question. -This gave us two or three hours' work decyphering -every day. Both cyphering and decyphering require -the closest concentration, as one single mistake -may make nonsense of the whole thing; it is -consequently exhausting work. We were perfectly well -aware that the Russian Government had somehow -obtained possession of one of our codes. This -particular "compromised code" was only used by us -for transmitting intelligence which the Russians -were intended to know. They could hardly blame -us should they derive false impressions from a -telegram of ours which they had decyphered with a -stolen code, nor could they well admit that they had -done this. -</p> - -<p> -As winter came on, I understood why Russians -are so fond of gilding the domes and spires of their -churches. It must be remembered that Petrograd -lies on parallel 60° N. In December it only gets -four hours of very uncertain daylight, and the sun -is so low on the horizon that its rays do not reach -the streets of the city. It is then that the gilded -domes flash and glitter, as they catch the beams of -the unseen sun. When the long golden needle -of the Fortress Church blazed like a flaming torch -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P91"></a>91}</span> -or a gleaming spear of fire against the murky sky, -I thought it a splendid sight, as was the great -golden dome of St. Isaac's scintillating like a second -sun over the snow-clad roofs of the houses. -</p> - -<p> -Soon after my arrival I went to the vast church -under the gilded dome to hear the singing of the -far-famed choir of St. Isaac's. -</p> - -<p> -Here were none of the accessories to which I had -been accustomed; no seats; no organ; no pulpit; no -side-chapels. A blue haze of incense drifted through -the twilight of the vague spaces of the great -building; a haze glowing rosily where the red lamps -burning before the jewelled ikons gave a faint-dawnlike -effect in the semi-darkness. Before me the great -screen of the "ikonostas" towered to the roof, with -its eight malachite columns forty feet high, and its -two smaller columns of precious lapis lazuli flanking -the "Royal doors" into the sanctuary. Surely -Montferrand, the Frenchman, had designedly steeped -the cathedral he had built in perpetual twilight. -In broad daylight the juxtaposition of these costly -materials, with their discordant colours, would have -been garish, even vulgar. Now, barely visible in the -shadows, they, the rich mosaics, the masses of -heavily-gilt bronze work in the ikonostas, gave an -impression of barbaric magnificence and immense -splendour. The jasper and polychrome Siberian marbles -with which the cathedral was lined, the gold and -silver of the jewelled ikons, gleaming faintly in -the candle-light, strengthened this impression of -sumptuous opulence. Then the choir, standing -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P92"></a>92}</span> -before the ikonostas, burst into song. The exquisitely -beautiful singing of the Russian Church was a -perfect revelation to me. I would not have believed -it possible that unaccompanied human voices could -have produced so entrancing an effect. As the -"Cherubic Hymn" died away in softest <i>pianissimo</i>, -its echoes floating into the misty vastness of -the dome, a deacon thundered out prayers in a -ringing bass, four tones deeper than those a Western -European could compass. The higher clergy, with -their long flowing white beards, jewelled crowns, -and stiffly-archaic vestments of cloth of gold and -silver, seemed to have stepped bodily out of the -frame of an ikon; and the stately ritual of the -Eastern Church gave me an impression as of something -of immemorial age, something separated by the gap -of countless centuries from our own prosaic epoch; -and through it all rose again and again the plaintive -response of the choir, "Gospodi pomiloi," "Lord -have mercy," exquisitely sung with all the -tenderness and pathos of muted strings. -</p> - -<p> -This was at last the real Russia of my dreams. It -was all as I had vaguely pictured it to myself; the -densely-packed congregation, with sheepskin-clad -peasant and sable-coated noble standing side by -side, all alike joining in the prescribed genuflections -and prostrations of the ritual; the singing-boys, with -their close-cropped heads and curious long blue -dressing-gowns; the rolling consonants of the Old -Slavonic chanted by the priests; all this was really -Russia, and not a bastard imitation of an exotic -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P93"></a>93}</span> -Western civilisation like the pseudo-classic city outside. -</p> - -<p> -Two years later, Arthur Sullivan, the composer, -happened to be in Petrograd, and I took him to -the practice of the Emperor's private church choir. -Sullivan was passionately devoted to unaccompanied -part-singing, and those familiar with his delightful -light operas will remember how he introduced into -almost every one of them an unaccompanied madrigal, -or a sextet. Sullivan told me that he would -not have believed it possible for human voices to -obtain the string-like effect of these Russian choirs. -He added that although six English singing-boys -would probably evolve a greater body of sound than -twelve Russian boys, no English choir-boy could -achieve the silvery tone these musical little -Muscovites produced. -</p> - -<p> -People ignorant of the country have a foolish idea -that all Russians can speak French. That may be -true of one person in two thousand of the whole -population. The remainder only speak their -native Russ. Not one cabman in Petrograd could -understand a syllable of any foreign language, and -though in shops, very occasionally, someone with a -slight knowledge of German might be found, it -was rare. All the waiters in Petrograd restaurants -were yellow-faced little Mohammedan Tartars, -speaking only Russian and their own language. I -determined therefore to learn Russian at once, and -was fortunate in finding a very clever teacher. All -men should learn a foreign language from a lady, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P94"></a>94}</span> -for natural courtesy makes one listen to what she -is saying; whereas with a male teacher one's attention -is apt to wander. The patient elderly lady who -taught me knew neither English nor French, so -we used German as a means of communication. -Thanks to Madame Kumin's intelligence, and a -considerable amount of hard work on my own part, I -was able to pass an examination in Russian in eleven -months, and to qualify as Interpreter to the -Embassy. The difficulties of the Russian language are -enormously exaggerated. The pronunciation is hard, -as are the terminations; and the appalling length of -Russian words is disconcerting. In Russian, great -emphasis is laid on one syllable of a word, and the -rest is slurred over. It is therefore vitally important -(should you wish to be understood) to get the -emphasis on the right syllable, and for some mysterious -reason no foreigner, even by accident, <i>ever succeeds -in pronouncing a Russian name right</i>. It is Schouvaloff, -not Schòuvaloff; Brusìl-off, not Brùsiloff; -Demìd-off, not Dèmidoff. The charming dancer's -name is Pàv-Lova, not Pavlòva; her equally fascinating -rival is Karsàv-ina, not Karsavìna. I could -continue the list indefinitely. Be sure of one thing; -however the name is pronounced by a foreigner, it -is absolutely certain to be wrong. -</p> - -<p> -What a wise man he was who first said that for -every fresh language you learn you acquire a new -pair of eyes and a new pair of ears; I felt immensely -elated when I found that I could read the cabalistic -signs over the shops as easily as English lettering. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P95"></a>95}</span> -</p> - -<p> -A relation of mine had given me a letter of -introduction to Princess B——. Now this old lady, -though she but seldom left her own house, was a -very great power indeed in Petrograd, and was -universally known as the "Princesse Château." For -some reason or another, I was lucky enough to find -favour in this dignified old lady's eyes. She asked -me to call on her again, and at our second meeting -invited me to her Sunday evenings. The Princesse -Château's Sunday evenings were a thing quite apart. -They were a survival in Petrograd of the French -eighteenth century literary "salons," but devoid of -the faintest flavour of pedantry or priggism. Never -in my life, before or since, have I heard such -wonderfully brilliant conversation, for, with the one -exception of myself, the Princesse Château tolerated -no dull people at her Sundays. She belonged to a -generation that always spoke French amongst -themselves, and imported their entire culture from -France. Peter the Great had designed St. Petersburg -as a window through which to look on Europe, -and the tradition of this amongst the educated -classes was long in dying out. The Princess assembled -some thirty people every Sunday, all Russians, with -the exception of myself. These people discussed any -and every subject—literature, art, music, and -philosophy—with sparkling wit, keen critical instinct, and -extraordinary felicity of phrase, usually in French, -sometimes in English, and occasionally in Russian. -Their knowledge seemed encyclopædic, and they -appeared equally at home in any of the three -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P96"></a>96}</span> -languages. They greatly appreciated a neatly-turned -epigram, or a novel, crisply-coined definition. Any -topic, however, touching directly or indirectly on the -external or internal policy of Russia was always -tacitly avoided. My <i>rôle</i> was perforce reduced to -that of a listener, but it was a perfectly delightful -society. Princesse Château had a very fine suite of -rooms on the first floor of her house, decorated "at -the period" in Louis XVI style by imported French -artists; these rooms still retained their original -furniture and fittings, and were a museum of works of -art; but her Sunday evenings were always held in -the charming but plainly-furnished rooms which she -herself inhabited on the ground floor. We had one -distinct advantage over the old French <i>salons</i>, for -Princesse Château entertained her guests every -Sunday to suppers which were justly celebrated in the -gastronomic world of Petrograd. During supper -the conversation proceeded just as brilliantly as -before. There were always two or three Grand -Duchesses present, for to attend Princesse Château's -Sundays was a sort of certificate of culture. The -Grand Duchesses were treated quite unceremoniously, -beyond receiving a perfunctory "Madame" in -each sentence addressed to them. How curious that, -both in English and French, the highest title of -respect should be plain "Madame"! As the Russian -equivalent is "Vashoe Imperatorskoe Vuisochestvo," -a considerable expenditure of time and breath was -saved by using the terser French term. And through -it all moved the mistress of the house, the stately -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P97"></a>97}</span> -little smiling old lady, in her plain black woollen -dress and lace cap, dropping here a quaint criticism, -there an apt <i>bon-mot</i>. Perfectly charming people! -</p> - -<p> -The relatives and friends of Princesse Château -whom I met at her house, when they discovered that -I had a genuine liking for their country, and that -I did not criticise details of Russian administration, -were good enough to open their houses to me in their -turn. Though most of these people owned large -and very fine houses, they opened them but rarely -to foreigners. They gave, very occasionally, large -entertainments to which they invited half Petrograd, -including the Diplomatic Body, but there they -stopped. They did not care, as a rule, to invite -foreigners to share the intimacy of their family life. -I was very fortunate therefore in having an opportunity -of seeing a phase of Russian life which few -foreigners have enjoyed. Russians seldom do things -by halves. I do not believe that in any other -country in the world could a stranger have been made to -feel himself so thoroughly at home amongst people -of a different nationality, and with such totally -different racial ideals; or have been treated with such -constant and uniform kindness. There was no -ceremony whatever on either side, and on the Russian -side, at times, an outspokenness approaching bluntness. -As I got to know these cultivated, delightful -people well, I grew very fond of them. They formed -a clique, possibly a narrow clique, amongst -themselves, and had that complete disregard for outside -criticism which is often found associated with -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P98"></a>98}</span> -persons of established position. They met almost -nightly at each others' houses, and I could not but regret -that such beautiful and vast houses should be seen -by so few people. One house, in particular, -contained a staircase an exact replica of a Grecian -temple in white statuary Carrara marble, a thing -of exquisite beauty. In their perpetual sets of -intellectual lawn tennis, if I may coin the term, the -superiority of the feminine over the male intellects -was very marked. This is, I believe, a characteristic -of all Slavonic countries, and I recalled Bismarck's -dictum that the Slav peoples were essentially -feminine, and I wondered whether there could -be any connection between the two points. Living -so much with Russians, it was impossible not to fall -into the Russian custom of addressing them by their -Christian names and patronymics; such as "Maria -Vladimirovna" (Mary daughter of Vladimir) or -"Olga Andreèvna" (Olga daughter of Andrew) or -"Pavel Alexandrovitch" (Paul son of Alexander). -I myself became Feòdor Yàkovlevitch, (Frederic -son of James, those being the nearest Russian -equivalents). On arriving at a house, the proper form of -inquiry to the hall porter was, "Ask Mary daughter -of Vladimir if she will receive Frederic son of -James." In due time the answer came, "Mary -daughter of Vladimir begs Frederic son of James to -go upstairs." My own servants always addressed -me punctiliously as Feòdor Yàkovlevitch. On -giving them an order they would answer in Moscovite -fashion, "I hear you, Frederic son of James," -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P99"></a>99}</span> -the equivalent to our prosaic, "Very good, sir." -Amongst my new friends, as at the Princesse -Château's, no allusions whatever, direct or indirect, -were made to internal conditions in Russia. Apart -from the fact that one of these new friends was -himself Minister of the Interior at the time, it would -not have been safe. In those days the Secret -Police, or "Third Section," as they were called, were -very active, and their ramifications extended -everywhere. One night at a supper party a certain -Countess B—— criticised in very open and most -unflattering terms a lady to whom the Emperor -Alexander II was known to be devotedly attached. -Next morning at 8 a.m. the Countess was awakened -by her terrified maid, who told her that the "Third -Section" were there and demanded instant -admittance. Two men came into the Countess's bedroom -and informed her that their orders were that she -was to take the 12.30 train to Europe that morning. -They would remain with her till then, and would -accompany her to the frontier. As she would not -be allowed to return to Russia for twelve months, -they begged her to order her maid to pack what -was necessary; and no one knew better than Countess -B—— how useless any attempted resistance would -be. -</p> - -<p> -This episode made a great stir at the time. As -the words complained of had been uttered about 3 -a.m., the police action had been remarkably prompt. -The informant must have driven straight from -the supper party to the "Third Section," and -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P100"></a>100}</span> -everyone in Petrograd had a very distinct idea who the -informant was. Is it necessary to add that she -was a lady? -</p> - -<p> -Some of my new friends volunteered to propose -and second me for the Imperial Yacht Club. This -was not the club that the diplomats usually joined; -it was a purely Russian club, and, in spite of its -name, had no connection with yachting. It had -also the reputation of being extremely exclusive, -but thanks to my Russian sponsors, I got duly -elected to it. This was, I am sure, the most -delightful club in Europe. It was limited to 150 -members of whom only two, besides myself, were -foreigners, and the most perfect <i>camaraderie</i> existed -between the members. The atmosphere of the place -was excessively friendly and intimate, and the -building looked more like a private house than a -club, as deceased members had bequeathed to it -pictures, a fine collection of old engravings, some -splendid old Beauvais tapestry, and a great deal -of Oriental porcelain. Above all, we commanded -the services of the great Armand, prince of French -chefs. Associating so much with Russians, it was -possible to see things from their points of view. -They all had an unshakable belief in the absolute -invincibility of Russia, and in her complete -invulnerability, for it must not be forgotten that in -1880 Russia had never yet been defeated in any -campaign, except partially in the Crimean War of -1854-50. My friends did not hide their convictions -that it was Russia's manifest destiny to absorb in -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P101"></a>101}</span> -time the whole of the Asiatic Continent, including -India, China, and Turkey. There were grounds -for this article of faith, for in 1880 Russia's -bloodless absorption of vast territories in Central Asia -had been astounding. It was not until the -Russo-Japanese War of 1904-1905 that the friable clay -feet of the Northern Colossus were revealed to the -outside world, though those with a fairly intimate -knowledge of the country quite realised how -insecure were the foundations on which the stupendous -structure of modern Russia had been erected. -</p> - -<p> -I am deeply thankful that the great majority -of my old friends had passed away in the ordinary -course of nature before the Great Catastrophe -overwhelmed the mighty Empire in which they took -such deep pride; and that they were spared the -sight and knowledge of the awful orgy of blood, -murder, and spoliation which followed the ruin of -the land they loved so well. Were they not now -at rest, it would be difficult for me to write of -those old days. -</p> - -<p> -To grasp the Russian mentality, it must be -remembered that they are essentially Orientals. -Russia is not the most Eastern outpost of Western -civilisation; it is the most Western outpost of the -East. Russians have all the qualities of the -Oriental, his fatalism, his inertness, and, I fear, his -innate pecuniary corruption. Their fatalism makes -them accept their destiny blindly. What has been -ordained from the beginning of things is useless -to fight against; it must be accepted. The same -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P102"></a>102}</span> -inertness characterises every Eastern nation, and -the habit of "baksheesh" is ingrained in the Oriental -blood. If the truth were known, we should -probably find that the real reason why Cain killed -Abel was that the latter had refused him a -commission on some transaction or other. The fatalism -and lack of initiative are not the only Oriental -traits in the Russian character. In a hundred little -ways they show their origin: in their love of uncut -jewels; in their lack of sense of time (the Russian -for "at once" is "si chas," which means "this -hour"; an instructive commentary); in the reluctance -South Russians show in introducing strangers -to the ladies of their household, the Oriental peeps -out everywhere. Peter the Great could order his -Boyards to abandon their fur-trimmed velvet robes, -to shave off their beards, powder their heads, and -array themselves in the satins and brocades of -Versailles. He could not alter the men and women -inside the French imported finery. He could -abandon his old capital, matchless, many-pinnacled -Moscow, vibrant with every instinct of Russian -nationality; he could create a new pseudo-Western, -sham-classical city in the frozen marshes of the Neva; -but even the Autocrat could not change the souls -of his people. Easterns they were, Easterns they -remained, and that is the secret of Russia, they -are not Europeans. Peter himself was so fully -aware of the racial limitations of his countrymen -that he imported numbers of foreigners to run the -country; Germans as Civil and Military administrators; -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P103"></a>103}</span> -Dutchmen as builders and town-planners; and -Englishmen to foster its budding commerce. To -the latter he granted special privileges, and even -in my time there was a very large English -commercial community in Petrograd; a few of them -descendants of Peter the Great's pioneers; the -majority of them with hereditary business connections -with Russia. Their special privileges had gradually -been withdrawn, but the official name of the English -Church in Petrograd was still "British Factory in -St. Petersburg," surely a curious title for a place -of worship. The various German-Russian families -from the Baltic Provinces, the Adlerbergs, the -Benckendorffs, and the Stackelbergs, had served -Russia well. Under their strong guidance she -became a mighty Power, but when under Alexander -III the reins of government were confided to purely -Russian hands, rapid deterioration set in. This -dreamy nation lacks driving power. In my time, -the very able Minister for Foreign Affairs, M. de -Giers, was of German origin, and his real name was -Hirsch. His extremely wily and astute second in -command, Baron Jomini, was a Swiss. Modern -Russia was largely the creation of the foreigner. -</p> - -<p> -I saw a great deal, too, of a totally different -stratum of Russian society. Mr. X., the head of -a large exporting house, was of British origin, the -descendant of one of Peter's commercial pioneers. -He himself, like his father and grandfather, had -been born in Russia, and though he retained his -English speech, he had adopted all the points of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P104"></a>104}</span> -view of the country of his birth. Madame X. came -of a family of the so-called "Intelligenzia." Most -of her relatives seemed to have undertaken compulsory -journeys to Siberia, not as prisoners, but for -a given term of exile. Madame X.'s brother-in-law -owned and edited a paper of advanced views, which -was being continually suppressed, and had been -the cause of two long trips eastward for its editor -and proprietor. Neither Mr. nor Madame X. shared -their relatives' extreme views. What struck me -was that behind the floods of vehement invective of -Madame O—— (the editor's wife) there was never -the smallest practical suggestion. "You say, -Madame O——," I would hazard, "that the existing -state of things is intolerable. What remedy -do you suggest?" "I am not the Government," -would retort Madame O—— with great heat. "It -is for the Government to make suggestions. I -only denounce an abominable injustice." "Quite -so, Madame O——, but how can these conditions -be improved. What is your programme of -reform?" "We have nothing to do with reforms. -Our mission is to destroy utterly. Out of the -ruins a better state of things must necessarily -arise; as nothing could possibly be worse than -present conditions." And so we travelled round and -round in a circle. Mr. O——, when appealed to, -would blink through his spectacles with his kindly -old eyes, and emit a torrent of admirable moral -aphorisms, which might serve as unimpeachable -copy-book headings, but had no bearing whatever -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P105"></a>105}</span> -on the subject we were discussing. Never once -amidst these floods of bitter invective and cataracts -of fierce denunciation did I hear one single -practical suggestion made or any outline traced of a -scheme to better existing conditions. "We must -destroy," shouted Madame O——, and there her -ideas stopped. I think the Slavonic bent of mind, -like the Celtic, is purely <i>des</i>tructive, and has little -or no <i>con</i>structive power in it. This may be due -to the ineradicable element of the child in both -races. They are "Peter Pans," and a child loves -destruction. -</p> - -<p> -Poor dreamy, emotional, hopelessly unpractical -Russia! Madame O——'s theories have been put -into effect now, and we all know how appalling -the result has been. -</p> - -<p> -These conversations were always carried on in -French for greater safety in order that the servants -might not overhear, but when Mr. and Madame -O—— found difficulties in expressing themselves -in that language, they both broke into torrents of -rapid Russian, to poor Madame X.'s unconcealed -terror. The danger was a real one, for the O——'s -were well known in police circles as revolutionists, -and it must have gone hard with the X.'s had their -servants reported to the police the violent opinions -that had been expressed in their house. -</p> - -<p> -Many of the Diplomatic Body were in the habit -of attending the midnight Mass at St. Isaac's on -Easter Day, on account of the wonderfully -impressive character of the service. We were always -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P106"></a>106}</span> -requested to come in full uniform, with decorations -and we stood inside the rails of the ikonostas, behind -the choir. The time to arrive was about 11.30 p.m., -when the great church, packed to its doors by a -vast throng, was wrapped in almost total darkness. -Under the dome stood a catafalque bearing a gilt -coffin. This open coffin contained a strip of silk, -on which was painted an effigy of the dead Christ, -for it will be remembered that no carved or graven -image is allowed in a church of the Eastern rite. -There was an arrangement by which a species of -blind could be drawn over the painted figure, thus -concealing it. As the eye grew accustomed to the -shadows, tens of thousands of unlighted candles, -outlining the arches, cornices, and other architectural -features of the cathedral, were just visible. -These candles each had their wick touched with -kerosine and then surrounded with a thread of -guncotton, which ran continuously from candle to -candle right round the building. When the hanging -end of the thread of gun-cotton was lighted, the -flame ran swiftly round the church, kindling each -candle in turn; a very fascinating sight. At -half-past eleven, the only light was from the candles -surrounding the bier, where black-robed priests -were chanting the mournful Russian Office for the -Dead. At about twenty minutes to twelve the blind -was drawn over the dead Christ, and the priests, -feigning surprise, advanced to the rails of the -ikonostas, and announced to an Archimandrite that the -coffin was empty. The Archimandrite ordered them -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P107"></a>107}</span> -to search round the church, and the priests -perambulated the church with gilt lanterns, during which -time the catafalque, bier, and its accessories were -all removed. The priests announced to the -Archimandrite that their search had been unsuccessful, -whereupon he ordered them to make a further search -outside the church. They went out, and so timed -their return as to arrive before the ikonostas at -three minutes before midnight. They again -reported that they had been unsuccessful; when, as -the first stroke of midnight pealed from the great -clock, the Metropolitan of Petrograd announced -in a loud voice, "Christ is risen!" At an electric -signal given from the cathedral, the great guns -of the fortress boomed out in a salute of one hundred -and one guns; the gun-cotton was touched off, and -the swift flash kindled the tens of thousands of -candles running round the building; the enormous -congregation lit the tapers they carried; the "Royal -doors" of the ikonostas were thrown open, and the -clergy appeared in their festival vestments of cloth -of gold, as the choir burst into the beautiful -Russian Easter anthem, and so the Easter Mass began. -Nothing more poignantly dramatic, more magnificently -impressive, could possibly be imagined than -this almost instantaneous change from intense gloom -to blazing light; from the plaintive dirges of the -Funeral Service to the jubilant strains of the -Easter Mass. I never tired of witnessing this -splendid piece of symbolism. -</p> - -<p> -It sounds almost irreverent to talk of comical -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P108"></a>108}</span> -incidents in connection with so solemn an occasion, -but there are two little episodes I must mention. -About 1880 the first tentative efforts were made -by France to establish a Franco-Russian alliance. -Ideas on the subject were very nebulous at first, -but slowly they began to crystallise into concrete -shape. A new French Ambassador was appointed -to Petrograd in the hope of fanning the faint spark -into further life. He, wishing to show his -sympathy for the <i>nation amie</i>, attended the Easter Mass -at St. Isaac's, but unfortunately he was quite -unversed in the ritual of the Orthodox Church. In -every ikonostas there are two ikons on either side -of the "Royal doors"; the Saviour on one side, -the Madonna and Child on the other. The new -Ambassador was standing in front of the ikon of -the Saviour, and in the course of the Mass the -Metropolitan came out, and made the three prescribed -low bows before the ikon, previous to censing it. -The Ambassador, taking this as a personal -compliment to France, as represented in his own -person, acknowledged the attention with three equally -low bows, laying his hand on his heart and -ejaculating with all the innate politeness of his nation, -"Monsieur! Monsieur! Monsieur!" This little -incident caused much amusement, as did a newly-arrived -German diplomat, who when greeted by a -Russian friend with the customary Easter salutation -of "Christ is risen!" ("Kristos voskress!") -wished to respond, but, being ignorant of the -traditional answer, "He is verily risen," merely made -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P109"></a>109}</span> -a low bow and said, "Ich auch," which may be -vulgarly Englished into "The same here." -</p> - -<p> -The universal Easter suppers at the conclusion -of the Mass play an important part in Russian life, -for they mean the breaking of the long and rigorous -Lenten fast of the Eastern Church, during which -all meat, butter, milk, and eggs are prohibited. -The peasants adhere rigidly to these rules, so the -Easter supper assumes great importance in their -eyes. The ingredients of this supper are invariable -for high and low, for rich and poor—cold ham, -hard-boiled eggs dyed red, a sort of light cake akin -to the French <i>brioche</i>, and a sour cream-cheese -shaped into a pyramid and decorated with little -crosses of dried currants. I think that this cake -and cream cheese (known as "Paskva") are -prepared only at Easter-time. Even at the Yacht -Club during Holy Week, meat, butter, milk, and -eggs were prohibited, and still Armand, our -incomparable French chef, managed to produce <i>plats</i> of -the most succulent description. Loud praises were -lavished upon his skill in preparing such excellent -dishes out of oil, fish, flour, and vegetables, the -only materials allowed him. I met Armand in the -passage one day and asked him how he managed -to do it. Looking round to see that no Russians -could overhear, Armand replied with a wink, -"Voyez-vous Monsieur, le bon Dieu ne regarde pas -d'aussi près." Of course he had gone on using -cream, butter, and eggs, just as usual, but as the -members of the Club did not know this, and thought -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P110"></a>110}</span> -that they were strictly obeying the rules of their -Church, I imagine that no blame could attach to -them. -</p> - -<p> -On Easter Eve the two-mile-long Nevsky -Perspective was lined with humble folks standing by -white napkins on which the materials for their -Easter supper were arranged. On every napkin -glimmered a lighted taper, and the long line of -these twinkling lights produced a very charming -effect, as of myriads of glow-worms. Priests would -pass swiftly down the line, each attended by an -acolyte carrying a pail of holy water. The priest would -mutter a rapid blessing, sprinkle the food and its -owner with holy water, pocket an infinitesimally -small fee, and pass on again. -</p> - -<p> -A friend of mine was once down in the fruit-growing -districts of the Crimea. Passing through one -of the villages of that pleasing peninsula, he found -it decorated in honour of a religious festival. The -village priest was going to bless the first-fruits of -the orchards. The peasants stood in a row down -the village street, each one with the first crop of his -orchard arranged on a clean napkin before him. The -red-bearded priest, quite a young man, passed down -the street, sprinkling fruit and grower alike with -holy water, and repeating a blessing to each one. -The young priest approached, and my friend could -hear quite plainly the words of his blessing. No. -—— it was quite impossible! It was incredible! -and yet he could not doubt the evidence of his own -ears! The young priest was speaking in good Scots, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P111"></a>111}</span> -and the words of the blessing he bestowed on each -parishioner were, "Here, man! tak' it. If it does -ye nae guid, it canna possibly dae ye any hairm." The -men addressed, probably taking this for a -quotation from Scripture in some unknown tongue, -bowed reverently as the words were pronounced over -them. That a Russian village priest in a remote -district of the Crimea should talk broad Scots was -a sufficiently unusual circumstance to cause my -friend to make some further inquiries. It then -appeared that when the Government dockyard at -Sebastopol was reopened, several Scottish foremen -from the Clyde shipbuilding yards were imported to -supervise the Russian workmen. Amongst others -came a Glasgow foreman with his wife and a son -who was destined for the ministry of the Free -Church of Scotland. Once arrived in Russia, they -found that facilities for training a youth for the -Presbyterian ministry were somewhat lacking in -Sebastopol. Sooner than sacrifice their dearest -wish, the parents, with commendable broadmindedness, -decided that their offspring should enter the -Russian Church. He was accordingly sent to a -seminary and in due course was ordained a priest -and appointed to a parish, but he apparently still -retained his Scottish speech and his characteristically -Scottish independence of view. -</p> - -<p> -After a year in Petrograd I used to attempt to -analyse to myself the complex Russian character. -"We are a 'jelly-folk,'" had said one of my -friends to me. The Russian term was "Kiselnui -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P112"></a>112}</span> -narod," and I think there is truth in that. They -<i>are</i> an invertebrate folk. I cannot help thinking -that Peter the Great was one of the worst enemies -of his own country. Instead of allowing Russia -to develop naturally on lines suited to the racial -instincts of her people, he attempted to run the -whole country into a West European mould, and -to superimpose upon it a veneer imported from -the France of Louis Quatorze. With the very -few this could perhaps succeed, with the many it -was a foregone failure. He tried in one short -lifetime to do what it had taken other countries -centuries to accomplish. He built a vast and -imposing edifice on shifting sand, without any -foundations. It might stand for a time; its ultimate -doom was certain. -</p> - -<p> -From the windows of our Embassy we looked -upon the broad Neva. When fast bound in the -grip of winter, sledge-roads were made across the -ice, bordered with lamp-posts and marked out with -sawn-off fir trees. Little wooden taverns and -tea-houses were built on the river, and as soon as the -ice was of sufficient thickness the tramcar lines were -laid across it. A colony of Laps came yearly -and encamped on the river with their reindeer, for -the temperature of Petrograd rarely falling more -than ten degrees below zero, it was looked upon as -a genial winter climate for invalids from Lapland. -A stranger from another planet might have imagined -that these buildings were permanent, that the -fir trees were really growing, and that all the life -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P113"></a>113}</span> -on the frozen river would last indefinitely. -Everyone knew, though, with absolute certainty that by -the middle of April the ice would break up, and -that these little houses, if not removed in time, -would be carried away and engulfed in the -liberated stream. By May the river would be -running again as freely as though these temporary -edifices had never been built on it. -</p> - -<p> -I think these houses built on the ice were very -typical of Russia. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap04"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P114"></a>114}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER IV -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -The Winter Palace—Its interior—Alexander II—A Russian -Court Ball—The "Bals des Palmiers"—The Empress—The -blessing of the Neva—Some curiosities of the Winter -Palace—The great Orloff diamond—My friend the -Lady-in-Waiting—Sugared Compensations—The attempt on the -Emperor's life of 1880—Some unexpected finds in the -Palace—A most hilarious funeral—Sporting expeditions—Night -drives through the forest in mid-winter—Wolves—A -typical Russian village—A peasant's house—"Deaf and -dumb people"—The inquisitive peasant youth—Curiosity -about strangers—An embarrassing situation—A still more -awkward one—Food difficulties—A bear hunt—My first -bear—Alcoholic consequences—My liking for the Russian -peasant—The beneficent india-rubber Ikon—Two curious -sporting incidents—Village habits—The great gulf fixed -between Russian nobility and peasants. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -The Winter Palace drags its lengthy, uninteresting -façade for some five hundred feet along the quays -of the Neva. It presents a mere wearisome iteration -of the same architectural features repeated again and -again, and any effect it might produce is marred by -the hideous shade of that crude red, called by the -Russians "raspberry colour," with which it is -daubed, and for which they have so misplaced an -affection. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P115"></a>115}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The interior of the Winter Palace was burned out -in 1837, and only a few of the original State rooms -survive. These surviving rooms are the only ones -of any artistic interest, as the other innumerable -and stupendous halls were all reconstructed during -the "period of bad taste," and bear ample witness to -that fact in every detail of their ornamentation. -</p> - -<p> -The Ambassadors' staircase, part of the original -building, is very dignified and imposing with its -groups of statuary, painted ceiling, and lavish -decoration, as is Peter the Great's Throne room, with -jasper columns, and walls hung with red velvet -worked in gold with great Russian two-headed -eagles. All the tables, chairs, and chandeliers in this -room were of solid silver. -</p> - -<p> -St. George's Hall, another of the old rooms, I -thought splendid, with its pure white marble walls -and columns and rich adornments of gilt bronze, -and there was also an agreeably barbaric hall with -entirely gilt columns, many banners, and gigantic -effigies of ancient Russian warriors. All these rooms -were full of collections of the gold and silver-gilt -trays on which the symbolical "bread and salt" -had been offered to different Emperors in the -various towns of their dominions. -</p> - -<p> -The fifty or so other modern rooms were only -remarkable for their immense size, the Nicholas -Hall, for instance, being 200 feet long and 65 feet -wide, though the so-called "Golden Hall" positively -dazzled one with its acre or so of gilding. It -would have been a happy idea for the Emperor to -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P116"></a>116}</span> -assemble all the leading financiers of Europe to -dine together in the "Golden Hall." The sight of -so much of the metal which they had spent their -whole lives in amassing would have gratified the -financiers, and would probably have stimulated them -to fresh exertions. -</p> - -<p> -The Emperor Alexander II always received the -diplomats in Peter the Great's Throne room, seated -on Peter's throne. He was a wonderfully handsome -man even in his old age, with a most commanding -manner, and an air of freezing hauteur. When -addressing junior members of the Diplomatic Body -there was something in his voice and a look in his -eye reminiscent of the Great Mogul addressing an -earthworm. -</p> - -<p> -I have only seen three Sovereigns who looked -their parts quite unmistakably: Alexander II of -Russia, William I of Germany, and Queen Victoria. -In Queen Victoria's case it was the more -remarkable, as she was very short. Yet this little -old lady in her plain dress, had the most inimitable -dignity, and no one could have mistaken her for -anything but a Queen. I remember Queen Victoria -attending a concert at the Albert Hall in 1887, -two months before the Jubilee celebrations. The -vast building was packed to the roof, and the Queen -received a tremendous ovation. No one who saw it -can ever forget how the little old lady advanced to -the front of her box and made two very low sweeping -curtsies to the right and to the left of her with -incomparable dignity and grace, as she smiled -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P117"></a>117}</span> -through her tears on the audience in acknowledgment -of the thunders of applause that greeted her. -Queen Victoria was always moved to tears when she -received an unusually cordial ovation from her -people, for they loved her, and she loved them. -</p> - -<p> -The scale of everything in the Winter Palace was -so vast that it is difficult to compare the Court -entertainments there with those elsewhere. -</p> - -<p> -Certainly the Russian ladies looked well in their -uniform costumes. The cut, shape, and style of -these dresses never varied, be the fashions what -they might. The dress, once made, lasted the owner -for her lifetime, though with advancing years it -might possibly require to be readjusted to an -expanding figure. They were enormously expensive -to start with—anything from £300 to £1,200. There -was a complete under-dress of white satin, heavily -embroidered. Over this was worn a velvet dress -lavishly trimmed with dark fur. This velvet dress -might be of dull red, dark blue, green, or brown, -according to the taste of the wearer. It had to have -a long train embroidered with gold or silver flowers, -or both mixed, as the owner's fancy dictated. On -the head was worn the "Kakoshnik," the traditional -Russian head-dress, in the form of a crescent. In -the case of married women the "Kakoshnik" might -be of diamonds, or any gems they fancied, or could -compass; for girls the "Kakoshnik" must be of -white silk. Girls, too, had to wear white, without -the velvet over-dress. The usual fault of Russian -faces is their undue breadth across the cheek-bones, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P118"></a>118}</span> -and the white "Kakoshnik" worn by the unmarried -girls seemed to me to emphasize this defect, whereas -a blazing semicircle of diamonds made a most becoming -setting for an older face, although at times, as in -other cases, the setting might be more ornamental -than the object it enshrined. Though the Russian -uniforms were mostly copied from German models, -the national lack of attention to detail was probably -to blame for the lack of effect they produced when -compared with their Prussian originals. -</p> - -<p> -There was always something a little slovenly in -the way in which the Russian uniforms were worn, -though an exception must be made in the case of the -resplendent "Chevaliers Gardes," and of the -"Gardes à Cheval." The uniforms of these two -crack cavalry regiments was closely copied from -that of the Prussian "Gardes du Corps" and was -akin to that of our own Life Guards and Royal -Horse Guards; the same leather breeches and long -jack-boots, and the same cuirasses; the tunics, -though were white, instead of the scarlet or blue of -their English prototypes. The "Chevaliers Gardes" -had silvered cuirasses and helmets surmounted with -the Russian eagle, whereas those of the "Gardes à -Cheval" were gilt. As we know, "all that glitters -is not gold," and in spite of their gilding the -"Gardes à Cheval" were considered very inferior -socially to their rivals. The Emperor's -fiercely-moustached Circassian bodyguard struck an -agreeably exotic note with their grass-green trousers and -long blue kaftans, covered with rows of Persian -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P119"></a>119}</span> -cartridge-holders in <i>niello</i> of black and silver. Others -of the Circassians wore coats of chain mail over their -kaftans, and these kaftans were always sleeveless, -showing the bright green, red, or blue silk -shirtsleeves of their wearers. Another pleasant barbaric -touch. -</p> - -<p> -To my mind, the smartest uniforms were those of -the Cossack officers; baggy green knickerbockers -thrust into high boots, a hooked-and-eyed green tunic -without a single button or a scrap of gold lace on it, -and a plain white silk belt. No one could complain -of a lack of colour at a Petrograd Palace ball. The -Russian civil and Court uniforms were ingeniously -hideous with their white trousers and long -frock-coats covered with broad transverse bars of gold -lace. The wearers of these ugly garments always -looked to me like walking embodiments of what are -known in commercial circles as "gilt-edged -securities." As at Berlin, there were hosts of pages at -these entertainments. These lads were all attired -like miniature "Chevalier Gardes," in leather -breeches and jack-boots, and wore gold-laced green -tunics; a singularly unpractical dress, I should have -thought, for a growing boy. All Russians of a -certain social position were expected to send their -sons to be educated at the "School for Imperial -Pages," which was housed in an immense and ornate -building and counted four hundred pupils. Wise -parents mistrusted the education "aux pages" for -their sons, knowing that, however little else they -might learn there, they would be certain to acquire -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P120"></a>120}</span> -habits of gross extravagance; the prominence, too, -into which these boys were thrust at Court functions -tended to make them unduly precocious. -</p> - -<p> -The smaller Court balls were known as "Les -Bals des Palmiers." On these occasions, a hundred -large palm trees, specially grown for the purpose at -Tsarskoe Selo, were brought by road from there in -huge vans. Round the palm in its tub supper tables -were built, each one accommodating fifteen people. -It was really an extraordinarily pretty sight seeing -these rows of broad-fronted palms down the great -Nicholas Hall, and the knowledge that a few feet -away there was an outside temperature of 5° below -zero added piquancy to the sight of these exiles -from the tropics waving their green plumes so far -away in the frozen North. At the "Bals des -Palmiers" it was Alexander II's custom to make the -round of the tables as soon as his guests were seated. -The Emperor would go up to a table, the occupants -of which of course all rose at his approach, say a -few words to one or two of them, and then eat either -a small piece of bread or a little fruit, and just put -his lips to a glass of champagne, in order that his -guests might say that he had eaten and drank with -them. A delicate and graceful attention! -</p> - -<p> -As electric light had not then been introduced into -the palace, the entire building was lighted with wax -candles. I cannot remember the number I was told -was required on these occasions, but I think it was over -one hundred thousand. The candles were all lighted -with a thread of gun-cotton, as in St. Isaac's Cathedral. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P121"></a>121}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The Empress appeared but very rarely. It was a -matter of common knowledge that she was suffering -from an incurable disease. All the rooms in which -she lived were artificially impregnated with oxygen, -continuously released from cylinders in which the -gas had been compressed. This, though it relieved -the lungs of the sufferer, proved very trying to the -Empress's ladies-in-waiting, as this artificial -atmosphere with its excess of oxygen after an hour or so -gave them all violent headaches and attacks of -giddiness. -</p> - -<p> -In spite of the characteristic Russian carelessness -about details, these Petrograd Palace entertainments -provided a splendid glittering pageant to the eye, -for the stage was so vast and the number of -performers so great. There was not the same blaze of -diamonds as in London, but I should say that the -individual jewels were far finer. A stone must be -very perfect to satisfy the critical Russian eye, and, -true to their Oriental blood, the ladies preferred -unfaceted rubies, sapphires, and emeralds. Occasional -Emirs from Central Asia served, as do the Indian -princes at Buckingham Palace, as a reminder that -Russia's responsibilities, like those of Great Britain, -did not cease with her European frontiers. -</p> - -<p> -Once a year the diplomats had much the best of -the situation. This was at the blessing of the waters -of the Neva—"the Jordan," as Russians called it—on -January 6, old style, or January 18, according to -our reckoning. We saw the ceremonies through the -double windows of the great steam-heated Nicholas -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P122"></a>122}</span> -Hall, whereas the Emperor and all the Grand Dukes -had to stand bareheaded in the snow outside. A -great hole was cut in the ice of the Neva, with a -temporary chapel erected over it. At the conclusion -of the religious service, the Metropolitan of -Petrograd solemnly blessed the waters of the river, and -dipped a great golden cross into them. -</p> - -<p> -A cordon of soldiers had to guard the opening in -the ice until it froze over again, in order to prevent -fanatical peasants from bathing in the newly-consecrated -waters. Many had lost their lives in this -way. -</p> - -<p> -A friend of mine, the Director of the Hermitage -Gallery, offered to take me all over the Winter -Palace, and the visit occupied nearly an entire day. -The maze of rooms was so endless that the mind -got a little bewildered and surfeited with the sight -of so many splendours. A detail that amused me -was a small library on the second floor, opening on -to an avenue of lime trees. One of the Empresses -had chosen for her private library this room on the -second floor, looking into a courtyard. She had -selected it on account of its quiet, but expressed a -wish to have an avenue of trees, under which to walk -in the intervals of her studies. The room being on -the second floor, and looking into a yard, the wish -appeared to be difficult to execute, but in those days -the word "impossible" did not exist for an Empress -of Russia. The entire courtyard was filled in with -earth, and full-grown lime trees transplanted there. -When I saw this aerial grove eighty years afterwards, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P123"></a>123}</span> -there was quite a respectable avenue of limes -on the second floor of the building, with a gravel -walk bordered by grass-plots beneath them. -Another Empress wished to have a place to walk in -during the winter months, so a very ingenious -hanging winter-garden was contrived for her, following -all the exterior angles of the building. It was not -in the least like an ordinary conservatory, but really -did recall an outdoor garden. There were gravel -walks, and lawns of lycopodium simulating grass; -there were growing orange trees, and quite large -palms. For some reason the creepers on the walls -of this pseudo-garden were all artificial, being very -cleverly made out of painted sheet-iron. -</p> - -<p> -I had an opportunity later of seeing the entire -Winter Palace collection of silver plate, and all -the Crown jewels, when they were arranged for the -inspection of the late Duke of Edinburgh, who was -good enough to invite me to come. There were -enormous quantities of plate, of Russian, French, -and English make, sufficient to stock every -silversmith's shop in London. Some of the English plate -was of William and Mary's and Queen Anne's date, -and there were some fine early Georgian pieces. -They, would, I confess, have appeared to greater -advantage had they conveyed the idea that they had -been occasionally cleaned. As it was, they looked -like dull pewter that had been neglected for -twenty years. Of the jewels, the only things I -remember were a superb "corsage" of diamonds -and aquamarines—not the pale green stones we -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P124"></a>124}</span> -associate with the name, but immense stones of that -bright blue tint, so highly prized in Russia—and -especially the great Orloff diamond. The "corsage" -was big enough to make a very ample cuirass for -the most stalwart of lifeguardsmen, and the Orloff -diamond formed the head of the Russian Imperial -sceptre. The history of the Orloff, or Lazareff, -diamond is quite interesting. Though by no means -the largest, it is considered the most perfect -diamond in the world, albeit it has a slight flaw in it. -Originally stolen from India, it came into the hands -of an Armenian called Lazareff in some unknown -manner about A.D. 1750. Lazareff, so the story -goes, devised a novel hiding-place for the great stone. -Making a deep incision into the calf of his leg, he -placed the diamond in the cavity, and lay in bed -for three months till the wound was completely -healed over. He then started for Amsterdam, and -though stripped and searched several times during -his journey, for he was strongly suspected of having -the stone concealed about his person, its -hiding-place was never discovered. At Amsterdam -Lazareff had the wound reopened by a surgeon, and the -diamond extracted. He then sold it to Count Orloff -for 450,000 roubles, or roughly £45,000, and Orloff -in his turn made a present of the great stone to -Catherine the Great. The diamond is set under a -jewelled Russian eagle at the extremity of the -sceptre, where it probably shows to greater advantage -than it did when concealed for six months in the -calf of an Armenian's leg. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P125"></a>125}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The accommodation provided for the suites of the -Imperial family is hardly on a par with the magnificence -of the rest of the palace. The Duchess of -Edinburgh, daughter of Alexander II, made a -yearly visit to Petrograd, as long as her mother the -Empress was alive. As the Duchess's lady-in-waiting -happened to be one of my oldest friends, during -her stay I was at the palace at least three days a -week, and I retain vivid recollections of the dreary, -bare, whitewashed vault assigned to her as a sitting-room. -The only redeeming feature of this room was -a five-storied glass tray packed with some fifty -varieties of the most delicious <i>bon-bons</i> the mind of man -could conceive. These were all fresh-baked every -day by the palace confectioner, and the tray was -renewed every morning. There were some sixty of -these trays prepared daily, and their arrangement -was always absolutely identical, precisely the same -number of caramels and <i>fondants</i> being placed on -each shelf of the tray. Everyone knew that the -palace confectioner owned a fashionable sweet shop -on the Nevsky, where he traded under a French -name, and I imagine that his shop was entirely -stocked from the remains of the palace trays. -</p> - -<p> -In the spring of 1880 an attempt was made on -Alexander's II's life by a bomb which completely -wrecked the white marble private dining-room. The -Emperor's dinner hour was 7, and the bomb was -timed to explode at 7.20 p.m. The Emperor -happened at the time to be overwhelmed with work, and -at the last moment he postponed dinner until 7.30. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P126"></a>126}</span> -The bomb exploded at the minute it had been timed -for, killing many of the servants. My poor friend -the lady-in-waiting was passing along the corridor -as the explosion occurred. She fell unhurt amongst -the wreckage, but the shock and the sight of the -horribly mangled bodies of the servants were too -much for her. She never recovered from their -effects, and died in England within a year. After -this crime, the Winter Palace was thoroughly -searched from cellars to attics, and some curious -discoveries were made. -</p> - -<p> -Some of the countless moujiks employed in the -palace had vast unauthorized colonies of their relatives -living with them on the top floor of the building. -In one bedroom a full-grown cow was found, -placidly chewing the cud. One of the moujiks had -smuggled it in as a new-born calf, had brought it -up by hand, and afterwards fed it on hay purloined -from the stables. Though it may have kept his -family well provided with milk, stabling a cow in a -bedroom unprovided with proper drainage, on the -top floor of a building, is not a proceeding to be -unduly encouraged; nor does it tend to add to the -sanitary amenities of a palace. -</p> - -<p> -Russians are fond of calling the Nevsky "the -street of toleration," for within a third of a mile -of its length a Dutch Calvinist, a German Lutheran, -a Roman Catholic, and an Armenian church rise -almost side by side. "Nevsky" is, of course, only -the adjective of "Neva," and the street is termed -"Perspective" in French and "Prospect" in Russian. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P127"></a>127}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Close to the Armenian church lived M. Delyanoff, -who was the Minister of Education in those -days. Both M. and Madame Delyanoff were -exceedingly hospitable and kind to the Diplomatic -Body, so, when M. Delyanoff died, most of the -diplomats attended his funeral, appearing, according -to Russian custom, in full uniform. The Delyanoffs -being Armenians, the funeral took place in -the Armenian church, and none of us had had any -previous experience of the extraordinary noises -which pass for singing amongst Armenians. When -six individuals appeared and began bleating like -sheep, and followed this by an excellent imitation -of hungry wolves howling, it was too much for us. -We hastily composed our features into the decorum -the occasion demanded, amid furtive little snorts -of semi-suppressed laughter. After three grey-bearded -priests had stepped from behind the ikonostas, -and, putting their chins up in the air, proceeded -to yelp together in unison, exactly like dogs -baying the moon, the entire Corps Diplomatique broke -down utterly. Never have I seen men laugh so -unrestrainedly. As we had each been given a large -lighted candle, the movements of our swaying -bodies were communicated to the tapers, and showers -of melted wax began flying in all directions. With -the prudence of the land of my birth, I placed -myself against a pillar, so as to have no one behind me, -but each time the three grey-beards recommenced -their comical howling, I must have scattered perfect -Niagaras of wax on to the embroidered coat-tails -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P128"></a>128}</span> -and extensive back of the Swedish Minister in front -of me. I should think that I must have expended -the combined labours of several hives of bees on -his garments, congratulating myself the while that -that genial personage, not being a peacock, did not -enjoy the advantage of having eyes in his tail. The -Swedish Minister, M. Dué, his massive frame -quivering with laughter, was meanwhile engaged in -performing a like kindly office on to the back of his -Roumanian colleague, Prince Ghika, who in his -turn was anointing the uniform of M. van der -Hooven, the Netherlands Minister. Providentially, -the Delyanoff family were all grouped together -before the altar, and the farmyard imitations of the -Armenian choir so effectually drowned our unseemly -merriment that any faint echoes which reached -the family were ascribed by them to our very natural -emotions in the circumstances. I heard, indeed, -afterwards that the family were much touched by -our attendance and by our sympathetic behaviour, -but never, before or since, have I attended so -hilarious a funeral. -</p> - -<p> -Lord Dufferin, in common with most of the members -of the Embassy, was filled with an intense desire -to kill a bear. These animals, of course, hibernate, -and certain peasants made a regular livelihood by -discovering bears' lairs (the Russian term, a -corruption from the German, is "bear-loge") and then -coming to Petrograd and selling the beast at so much -per "pood" of forty Russian pounds. The finder -undertook to provide sledges and beaters for the sum -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P129"></a>129}</span> -agreed upon, but nothing was to be paid unless a -shot at the bear was obtained. These expeditions -involved a considerable amount of discomfort. There -was invariably a long drive of from forty to eighty -miles to be made in rough country sledges from the -nearest available railway station; the accommodation -in a peasant's house would consist of the bare floor -with some hay laid on it, and every scrap of food, -including bread, butter, tea, and sugar, would have -to be carried from Petrograd, as European stomachs -could not assimilate the sour, wet heavy black bread -the peasants eat, and their brick-tea, which contained -bullocks' blood, was undrinkable to those unaccustomed -to it. It usually fell to my lot, as I spoke -the language, to go on ahead to the particular village -to which we were bound, and there to make the best -arrangements possible for Lord and Lady Dufferin's -comfort. My instructions were always to endeavour -to get a room in the latest house built, as this was -likely to be less infested with vermin than the others. -After a four or five hours' run from Petrograd by -train, one would find the vendor of the bear waiting -at the station with a country sledge. These sledges -were merely a few poles tied together, mounted on -iron-shod wooden runners, and filled with hay. The -sledges were so long that it was possible to lie at -full length in them. The rifles, baggage, and food -being packed under the hay, one lay down at full -length, clad in long felt boots and heavy furs, an -air-cushion under one's head, and a Persian "bashilik," -or hood of fine camel's hair, drawn over it to -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P130"></a>130}</span> -prevent ears or nose from being frostbitten. Tucked -into a thick fur rug, one composed oneself for an -all-night drive through the endless forests. The two -drivers sat on a plank in front, and one or other of -them was continually dropping off to sleep, and -tumbling backwards on to the occupants of the -sledge. It was not a very comfortable experience, -and sleep was very fickle to woo. In the first place, -the sledge-tracks through the forest were very rough -indeed, and the jolting was incessant; in the second -place, should the actual driver go to sleep as well as -his relieving colleague, the sledge would bump -against the tree-trunks and overturn, and baggage, -rifles and occupants would find themselves struggling -in the deep snow. I always tied my baggage -together with strings, so as to avoid losing anything -in these upsets, but even then it took a considerable -time retrieving the impedimenta from the deep snowdrifts. -</p> - -<p> -It always gave me pleasure watching the black -conical points of the fir trees outlined against the -pale burnished steel of the sky, and in the intense -cold the stars blazed like diamonds out of the clear -grey vault above. The biting cold burnt like a -hot iron against the cheeks, until prudence, and a -regard for the preservation of one's ears, dictated -the pulling of the "bashilik" over one's face again. -The intense stillness, and the absolute silence, for -there are no sleigh-bells in Northern Russia, -except in the imagination of novelists, had some subtle -attraction for me. The silence was occasionally—very -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P131"></a>131}</span> -occasionally only—broken by an ominous, long-drawn -howl; then a spectral swift-trotting outline -would appear, keeping pace easily with the sledge, -but half-hidden amongst the tree-trunks. In that -case the smooth-bore gun and the buckshot cartridges -were quickly disinterred from the hay, and the -driver urged his horses into a furious gallop. There -was no need to use the whip; the horses knew. -Everyone would give a sigh of relief as the silent -grey swift-moving spectral figure, with its fox-like -lope, vanished after a shot or two had been fired at -it. The drivers would take off their caps and cross -themselves, muttering "Thanks be to God! Oh! those -cursed wolves!" and the horses slowed down -of their own accord into an easy amble. There were -compensations for a sleepless night in the beauty -of the pictures in strong black and white, or in -shadowy half-tones of grey which the endless forest -displayed at every turn. When the earth is wrapped -in its snow-mantle, it is never dark, and the gleams -of light from the white carpet down the long-drawn -aisles of the dark firs were like the pillared shadows -of a great cathedral when the dusk is filling it with -mystery and a vague sense of immense size. -</p> - -<p> -All villages that I have seen in Northern Russia -are alike, and when you have seen one peasant's -house you have seen all. -</p> - -<p> -The village consists of one long street, and in the -winter the kindly snow covers much of its unspeakable -untidiness. The "isbas," or wooden houses, are -all of the same pattern; they are solidly built of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P132"></a>132}</span> -rough logs, the projecting ends firmly morticed into -each other. Their gable ends all front the street, -each with two windows, and every "isba" has its -courtyard, where the door is situated. There are -no gardens, or attempts at gardens, and the houses -are one and all roofed with grey shingles. Each -house is raised some six feet from the ground, and -they are all water-tight, and most of them air-tight -as well. The houses are never painted, and their -weathered logs stand out silver-grey against the -white background. A good deal of imagination is -shown in the fret-saw carving of the barg-boards, -which are either ornamented in conventional patterns, -or have roughly outlined grotesque animals clambering -up their angles; very often too there are fretsaw -ornaments round the window-frames as well. -Prominent on the gate of every "isba" is the painting, -in black on a white ground, of the particular -implement each occupant is bound to supply in case -of a fire, that dire and relentless foe to Russian -wooden-built villages. On some houses a ladder -will be depicted; on others an axe or a pail. The -interior arrangement of every "isba" I have ever -seen is also identical. They always consist of two -fair-sized rooms; the "hot room," which the family -inhabit in winter, facing the street; the "cold room," -used only in summertime, looking into the courtyard. -These houses are not uncomfortable, though, -a Russian peasant's wants being but few, they are -not overburdened with furniture. The disposition -of the "hot room" is unvarying. Supposing it facing -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P133"></a>133}</span> -due south, the door will be in the north-west corner. -The north-east corner is occupied by an immense -brick stove, filling up one-eighth of the floor-space. -These stoves are about five feet high, and their tops -are covered with loose sheepskins. Here the entire -family sleep in the stifling heat, their resting-place -being shared with thousands of voracious, crawling, -uninvited guests. In the south-east corner is the -ikon shelf, where the family ikons are ranged in -line, with a red lamp burning before them. There -will be a table and benches in another corner, and -a rough dresser, with a samovar, and a collection of -those wooden bowls and receptacles, lacquered in -scarlet, black, and gold, which Russian peasants -make so beautifully; and that is all. The temperature -of the "hot room" is overpowering, and the -atmosphere fetid beyond the power of description. -Every male, on entering takes off his cap and makes -a bow before the ikons. I always conformed to -this custom, for there is no use in gratuitously -wounding people's religious susceptibilities. I -invariably slept in the "cold room," for its temperature -being probably five or six degrees below freezing -point, it was free from vermin, and the atmosphere -was purer. The master of the house laid a -few armfuls of hay on the floor, and his wife would -produce one of those towels Russian women -embroider so skilfully in red and blue, and lay it down -for the cheek to rest against. I slept in my clothes, -with long felt boots on, and my furs thrown over -me, and I could sleep there as well as in any bed. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P134"></a>134}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The Russian peasant's idea as to the relation of -Holy Russia to the rest of the world is curious. It -is rather the point of view of the Chinaman, who -thinks that beyond the confines of the "Middle -Kingdom" there is only outer barbarism. Everything -to the west of Russia is known as "Germania," -an intelligible mistake enough when it is -remembered that Germany marks Russia's Western -frontier. "Slavs" (akin, I think, to "Slova," -"a word") are the only people who can talk; -"Germania" is inhabited by deaf and dumb people -("nyémski") who can only make inarticulate noises. -On one of my shooting expeditions, I stopped -for an hour at a tea-house to change horses and -to get warmed up. The proprietor told me that his -son was very much excited at hearing that there was -a "deaf and dumb man" in the house, as he had -never seen one. Would I speak to the young man. -who was then putting on his Sunday clothes on the -chance of the interview being granted? -</p> - -<p> -In due course the son appeared; a handsome youth -in glorified peasant's costume. The first outward -sign of a Russian peasant's rise in the social scale -is that he tucks his shirt <i>into</i> his trousers, instead -of wearing it outside; the second stage is marked -by his wearing his trousers <i>over</i> his boots, instead -of thrusting the trousers into the boots. This young -fellow had not reached this point of evolution, and -wore his shirt outside, but it was a dark-blue silk -shirt, secured by a girdle of rainbow-coloured -Persian silk. He still wore his long boots outside too, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P135"></a>135}</span> -but they had scarlet morocco tops, and the legs of -them were elaborately embroidered with gold wire. -In modern parlance, this gay young spark was a -terrific village "nut." Never have I met a youth -of such insatiable curiosity, or one so crassly and -densely ignorant. He was one perpetual note of -interrogation. "Were there roads and villages -in Germania?" To the best of my belief there -were. "There were no towns though as large as -Petrograd." I rather fancied the contrary, and -instanced a flourishing little community of some five -million souls, situated on an island, with which I -was very well acquainted. -</p> - -<p> -The youth eyed me with deep suspicion. "Were -there railways in Germania?" Only about a -hundred times the mileage of the Russian railways. -"There was no electric light though, because -Jablochkoff, a Russian, had invented that." (I found -this a fixed idea with all Russian peasants.) I had -a vague impression of having seen one or two arc -lights feebly glimmering in the streets of the -benighted cities of Germania. "Could people read -and write there, and could they really talk? It -was easy to see that I had learned to talk since I -had been in Russia." I showed him a copy of the -London <i>Times</i>. "These were not real letters. -Could anyone read these meaningless signs," and so -on <i>ad infinitum</i>. I am persuaded that when I left -that youth he was convinced that I was the nearest -relative to Ananias that he had ever met. -</p> - -<p> -No matter which hour of the twenty-four it might -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P136"></a>136}</span> -happen to be, ten minutes after my arrival in any -of these remote villages the entire population -assembled to gaze at the "nyemetz," the deaf and -dumb man from remote "Germania," who had -arrived in their midst. They crowded into the "hot -room," men, women, and children, and gaped on the -mysterious stranger from another world, who sat -there drinking tea, as we should gaze on a visitor -from Mars. I always carried with me on those -occasions a small collapsible india-rubber bath and -a rubber folding basin. On my first expedition, -after my arrival in the village, I procured a bucket -of hot water from the mistress of the house, -carried it to the "cold room," and, having removed all -my garments, proceeded to take a bath. Like wildfire -the news spread through the village that the -"deaf and dumb" man was washing himself, and -they all flocked in to look. I succeeded in "shooing" -away the first arrivals, but they returned with -reinforcements, until half the population, men, -women, and children, were standing in serried rows -in my room, following my every movement with -breathless interest. I have never suffered from -agoraphobia, so I proceeded cheerfully with my -ablutions. "Look at him! He is soaping himself!" -would be murmured. "How dirty deaf and dumb -people must be to want such a lot of washing!" "Why -does he rub his teeth with little brushes?" These -and similar observations fell from the eager -crowd, only broken occasionally by a piercing yell -from a child, as she wailed plaintively the Russian -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P137"></a>137}</span> -equivalent of "Mummy! Sonia not like ugly man!" It -was distinctly an embarrassing situation, and -only once in my life have I been placed in a more -awkward position. -</p> - -<p> -That was at Bahia, in Brazil, when I was at the -Rio de Janeiro Legation. I went to call on the -British Consul's wife there, and had to walk half a -mile from the tram, through the gorgeous tropical -vegetation of the charming suburb of Vittoria, -amongst villas faced with cool-looking blue and -white tiles; the pretty "azulejos" which the -Portuguese adopted from the Moors. Oddly enough, a -tram and a tramcar are always called "a Bond" -in Brazil. The first tram-lines were built out of -bonds guaranteed by the State. The people took -this to mean the tram itself; so "Bond" it is, and -"Bond" it will remain. Being the height of a -sweltering Brazilian summer, I was clad in white from -head to foot. Suddenly, as happens in the tropics, -without any warning whatever, the heavens opened, -and solid sheets of water fell on the earth. I reached -the Consul's house with my clean white linen soaked -through, and most woefully bedraggled. The West -Indian butler (an old acquaintance) who opened -the door informed me that the ladies were out. -After a glance at my extraordinary disreputable -garments, he added, "You gib me dem clothes, -sar, I hab dem all cleaned and ironed in ten minutes, -before de ladies come back." On the assurances -of this swarthy servitor that he and I were the only -souls in the house, I divested myself of every stitch -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P138"></a>138}</span> -of clothing, and going into the drawing-room, sat -down to read a book in precisely the same attire -as Adam adopted in the earlier days of his married -life. Time went by, and my clothes did not -reappear; I should have known that to a Jamaican -coloured man measures of time are very elastic. -Suddenly I heard voices, and, to my horror, I saw our -Consul's wife approaching through the garden with -her two daughters and some other ladies. -</p> - -<p> -There was not a moment to lose! In that tropical -drawing-room the only available scrap of drapery -was a red plush table-cover. Bundling everything -on the table ruthlessly to the ground, I had -just time to snatch up the table-cloth and drape -myself in it (I trust gracefully) when the ladies -entered the room. I explained my predicament and -lamented my inability to rise, and so we had tea -together. It is the only occasion in the course of -a long life in which I ever remember taking tea with -six ladies, clad only in a red plush table-cloth with -bead fringes. -</p> - -<p> -Returning to Russia, the peasants fingered -everything I possessed with the insatiable curiosity of -children; socks, ties, and shirts. I am bound to -say that I never had the smallest thing stolen. As -our shooting expeditions were always during Lent, -I felt great compunction at shocking the peasants' -religious scruples by eating beef, ham, and butter, -all forbidden things at that season. I tried hard to -persuade one woman that my cold sirloin of roast -beef was part of a rare English fish, specially -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P139"></a>139}</span> -imported, but she was, I fear, of a naturally sceptical -bent of mind. -</p> - -<p> -Lady Dufferin had one curious gift. She could -spend the night in a rough country sledge, or sleep -in her clothes on a truss of hay, and yet appear in -the morning as fresh and neat, and spick and span, -as though she had had the most elaborate toilet -appliances at her disposal. On these occasions she -usually wore a Canadian blanket-suit of dark blue -and scarlet, with a scarlet belt and hood, and a -jaunty little sealskin cap. She always went out -to the forest with us. -</p> - -<p> -The procedure on these occasions was invariably -the same. An army of beaters was assembled, -about two-thirds of them women. This made me -uneasy at first, until I learnt that the beaters run -no danger whatever from the bear. The beaters -form five-sixths, or perhaps less, of a circle round -the bear's sleeping place, and the guns are placed -in the intervening open space. I may add that, -personally, I always used for bear an ordinary -smooth-bore sporting gun, with a leaden bullet. -I passed every one of these bullets down the barrels -of my gun myself to avoid the risk of the gun -bursting, before they were loaded into cartridges, -and I had them secured with melted tallow. The -advantages of a smooth-bore is that at close -quarters, as with bear, where you must kill your beast -to avoid disagreeable consequences, you lose no time -in getting your sights on a rapidly-moving object. -You shoot as you would a rabbit; and you can make -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P140"></a>140}</span> -absolutely sure of your animal, <i>if you keep your -head</i>. A leaden bullet at close quarters has -tremendous stopping power. Of course you want a -rifle as well for longer shots. I found this method -most successful with tiger, later in India, only you -must remain quite cool. -</p> - -<p> -At a given signal, the beaters begin yelling, -beating iron pans with sticks, blowing horns, shouting, -and generally making enough pandemonium to -awaken the Seven Sleepers. It effectually awakes -the bear, who emerges from his bedroom in an -exceedingly evil temper, to see what all this fearful -din is about. As he is surrounded with noise on -three sides, he naturally makes for the only quiet -spot, where the guns are posted. By this time he -is in a distinctly unamiable mood. -</p> - -<p> -I always took off my ski, and stood nearly waist-deep -in the snow so as to get a firm footing. Then -you can make quite certain of your shot. Ski or -no ski, if it came to running away, the bear would -always have the pull on you. The first time I was -very lucky. The bear came straight to me. When -he was within fifteen feet, and I felt absolutely -certain of getting him, I fired. He reared himself -on his hind legs to an unbelievable height, and -fell stone dead at Lady Dufferin's very feet. That -bear's skin is within three feet of me as I write -these lines. We went back to the village in -orthodox fashion, all with fir-branches in our hands, -as a sign of rejoicing; I seated on the dead bear. -</p> - -<p> -As a small boy of nine I had been tossed in a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P141"></a>141}</span> -blanket at school, up to the ceiling, caught again, -then up a second time and third time. It was not, -and was not intended to be, a pleasant experience, -but in my day all little boys had to submit to it. -The unhappy little brats stuck their teeth together, -and tried hard to grin as they were being hurled -skywards. These curious Russians, though, -appeared to consider it a delightful exercise. -</p> - -<p> -Arrived at the village again, I was captured by -some thirty buxom, stalwart women, and sent -spinning up and up, again and again, till I was -absolutely giddy. Not only had one to thank them -profusely for this honour, but also to disburse a -considerable amount of roubles in acknowledgement of -it. Poor Lady Dufferin was then caught, in spite -of her protests, and sent hurtling skywards through -the air half a dozen times. Needless to say that -she alighted with not one hair of her head out of -place or one fold of her garments disarranged. -Being young and inexperienced then, I was foolish -enough to follow the Russian custom, and to -present the village with a small cask of vodka. I -regretted it bitterly. Two hours later not a male in -the place was sober. Old grey-beards and young -men lay dead drunk in the snow; and quite little -boys reeled about hopelessly intoxicated. I could -have kicked myself for being so thoughtless. -During all the years I was in Russia, I never saw a -peasant woman drink spirits, or under the influence -of liquor. In my house at Petrograd I had -a young peasant as house-boy. He was quite a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P142"></a>142}</span> -nice lad of sixteen; clean, willing, and capable, but, -young as he was, he had already fallen a victim to -the national failing, in which he indulged regularly -once a month, when his wages were paid him, and -nothing could break him of this habit. I could -always tell when Ephim, the boy, had gone out with -the deliberate intention of getting drunk, by -glancing into his bedroom. He always took the -precaution of turning the ikons over his bed, with their -faces to the wall, before leaving, and invariably -blew out the little red lamp, in order that ikons -might not see him reeling into the room upon his -return, or deposited unconscious upon his bed. -Being a singularly neat boy in his habits, he always put -on his very oldest clothes on these occasions, in order -not to damage his better ones, should he fall down -in the street after losing control of his limbs. This -drunkenness spreads like a cancer from top to -bottom of Russian society. A friend of mine, who -afterwards occupied one of the highest administrative -posts, told me quite casually that, on the occasion -of his youngest brother's seventeenth birthday, the -boy had been allowed to invite six young friends of -his own age to dinner; my friend thought it quite -amusing that every one of these lads had been -carried to bed dead drunk. I attribute the dry-rot -which ate into the whole structure of the mighty -Empire, and brought it crashing to the ground, in -a very large degree to the intemperate habits -prevailing amongst all classes of Russian men, which in -justice one must add, may be due to climatic reasons. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P143"></a>143}</span> -</p> - -<p> -In the villages our imported food was a constant -source of difficulty. We were all averse to -shocking the peasants by eating meat openly during -Lent, but what were we to do? Out of deference -to their scruples, we refrained from buying eggs -and milk, which could have been procured in -abundance, and furtively devoured ham, cold beef, and -pickles behind cunningly contrived ramparts of -newspaper, in the hope that it might pass -unnoticed. Remembering how meagre at the best of -times the diet of these peasants is, it is impossible -to help admiring them for the conscientious -manner in which they obey the rules of their Church -during Lent. I once gave a pretty peasant child -a piece of plum cake. Her mother snatched it -from her, and asked me whether the cake contained -butter or eggs. On my acknowledgement that it -contained both, she threw it into the stove, and asked -me indignantly how I dared to imperil her child's -immortal soul by giving her forbidden food in Lent. -Even my sixteen-year-old house-boy in Petrograd, -the bibulous Ephim, although he regularly -succumbed to the charms of vodka, lived entirely on -porridge and dry bread during Lent, and would -not touch meat, butter, or eggs on any consideration -whatever. The more I saw of the peasants -the more I liked them. The men all drank, and -were not particularly truthful, but they were -like great simple, bearded, unkempt children, -with (drunkenness apart) all a child's faults, and -all a nice child's power of attraction. I liked the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P144"></a>144}</span> -great, stalwart, big-framed women too. They were -seldom good-looking, but their broad faces glowed -with health and good nature, and they had as a rule -very good skins, nice teeth, and beautiful complexions. -I found that I could get on with these villagers -like a house on fire. However cold the -weather, no village girl or woman wears anything -on her head but a gaudy folded cotton handkerchief. -</p> - -<p> -I never shared the resentment of my Russian -friends at being addressed with the familiar "thou" -by the peasants. They intended no discourtesy; it -was their natural form of address, and they could -not be expected to know that beyond the narrow -confines of their village there was another world where -the ceremonious "you" was habitually employed. -I rather fancy that anyone bred in the country, and -accustomed from his earliest childhood to mix with -farmers, cottagers, and farm-labourers, can get on -with other country-bred people, whether at home, or -in Russia, India, or Canada—a town-bred man -would not know what to talk about. In spite of -the peasants' reputation for pilfering, not one of us -ever had the smallest thing stolen. I did indeed -lose a rubber air-cushion in the snow, but that was -owing to the overturning of a sledge. A colleague -of mine, whom I had hitherto always regarded as a -truthful man, assured me a year afterwards that he -had seen my air-cushion ranged on the ikon shelf in -a peasant's house, with two red lamps burning -before it. The owner of the house declared, according -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P145"></a>145}</span> -to my friend, that my air-cushion was an ikon of -peculiar sanctity, though the painting had in some -mysterious manner become obliterated from it. My -colleague further assured me that my air-cushion -was building up a very gratifying little local -connection as a miracle-working ikon of quite unusual -efficiency, and that, under its kindly tutelage, crops -prospered and flocks and herds increased; of course -within reasonable limits only, for the new ikon held -essentially moderate views, and was temperamentally -opposed to anything in the way of undue optimism. -I wished that I could have credited this, for it -would have been satisfactory to imagine oneself, -through the agency of the air-cushion, a vicarious yet -untiring benefactor of a whole countryside. -</p> - -<p> -On one of our shooting expeditions a curious -incident occurred. Lord Dufferin had taken a long -shot at a bear, and had wounded without killing -him. For some reason, the animal stopped, and -climbed to the top of a high fir tree. Lord -Dufferin approached, fired again, and the bear dropped -dead to the ground. It is but seldom that one sees -a dead bear fall from the top of a tree. I witnessed -an equally strange sporting incident once in India. -It was just over the borders of Assam, and we were -returning to camp on elephants, after a day's big -game shooting. As we approached a hollow clothed -with thick jungle, the elephants all commenced -trumpeting. Knowing how wonderfully keen the -elephant's sense of smell is, that told us that some -beast lay concealed in the hollow. Thinking it -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P146"></a>146}</span> -would prove to be a bear, I took up my favourite -smooth-bore charged with leaden bullets, when with -a great crashing and rending of boughs the jungle -parted, and a galloping rhinoceros charged out, his -head well down, making straight for the elephant -that was carrying a nephew of mine. My nephew -had just time to snatch up a heavy 4-bore elephant -rifle. He fired, and by an extraordinary piece of -luck succeeded in hitting the huge beast in his one -vulnerable spot, just behind the shoulder. The -rhinoceros rolled right over like a shot rabbit and -lay stone dead. It was a thousand to one chance, -and if I live to a hundred I shall never see anything -of the sort again. It was also very fortunate, for -had he missed his shot, nothing on earth could have -saved my nephew's life. -</p> - -<p> -We found that the most acceptable presents in -the villages were packets of sugar and tins of -sardines. Sugar is costly and difficult to procure in -Russian villages. The usual way of employing it, -when friends are gathered round the table of some -"isba" with the samovar in the middle and steaming -glasses of tea before each guest, is for No. 1 to -take a piece of sugar, place it between his teeth, and -then suck his tea through it. No. 1 quickly passes -the piece of sugar to his neighbor, who uses it in -the same way, and transfers it to the next person, -and so on, till the sugar is all dissolved. This method -of using sugar, though doubtless economical, always -struck me as being of dubious cleanliness. A gift -of a pound of lump sugar was always welcomed with -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P147"></a>147}</span> -grateful thanks. Sardines were even more acceptable, -as they could be eaten in Lent. The grown-ups -devoured the fish, lifting them out of the tin -with their fingers; and the children were given the -oil to smear on their bread, in place of forbidden -butter. -</p> - -<p> -After days in the keen fresh air, and in the -limitless expanse of forest and snow, life in Petrograd -seemed terribly artificial. I used to marvel that -my cultured, omniscient, polygot friends were -fellow-countrymen of the bearded, red-shirted, -illiterate peasants we had just left. The gulf seemed so -unbridgable between them, and apart from a -common language and a common religion (both, I -acknowledge, very potent bonds of union) there -seemed no link between them, or any possible -community of ideas. Now in England there is that -community of ideas. All classes, from the highest -to the lowest, share to some extent the same tastes -and the same prejudices. There is too that most -powerful of connecting links, a common love of -sport. The cricket ground and the football field -are witnesses to this, and it shows in a hundred -little ways beside. The freemasonry of sport is -very real. -</p> - -<p> -It was perfectly delightful to live with and to mix -so much amongst charming people of such wide -culture and education, but they seemed to me to -bear the same relation to the world outside their -own that a rare orchid in its glass shelter bears to a -wild flower growing in the open air. The one is -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P148"></a>148}</span> -indigenous to the soil; the other was originally -imported, and can only thrive in an artificial atmosphere, -and under artificial conditions. If the glass -gets broken, or the fire goes out, the orchid dies, -but the wild flower is not affected. After all, man -made the towns, but God made the country. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap05"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P149"></a>149}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER V -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -The Russian Gipsies—Midnight drives—Gipsy singing—Its -fascination—The consequences of a late night—An -unconventional luncheon—Lord Dufferin's methods—Assassination -of Alexander II—Stürmer—Pathetic incidents in -connection with the murder of the Emperor—The funeral -procession and service—Details concerning—The Votive -Church—The Order of the Garter—Unusual incidents at -the Investiture—Precautions taken for Emperor's safety—The -Imperial train—Finland—Exciting salmon-fishing -there—Harraka Niska—Koltesha—Excellent shooting -there—Ski-running—"Ringing the game in"—A wolf-shooting -party—The obese General—Some incidents—A novel form -of sport—Black game and capercailzie—At dawn in a -Finnish forest—Immense charm of it—Ice-hilling or -"Montagnes Russes"—Ice-boating on the Gulf of Finland. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -In my day there were two or three restaurants on -the islands formed by the delta of the Neva, with -troupes of singing gipsies attached to them. These -restaurants did a roaring trade in consequence, for -the singing of the gipsy choirs seems to produce on -Russians the same maddening, almost intoxicating -effect that the "skirl o' the pipes" does on those -with Scottish blood in their veins. -</p> - -<p> -Personally, I thought that one soon tired of this -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P150"></a>150}</span> -gipsy singing; not so my Russian friends—it -appeared to have an irresistible attraction for them. -I always dreaded the consequences when some foolish -person, usually at 1 or even 2 a.m., proposed a -visit to the gipsies, for all the ladies present would -instantly jump at the suggestion, and I knew full -well that it entailed a forcible separation from bed -until six or possibly seven next morning. -</p> - -<p> -Troikas would at once be sent for. A troika is -a thing quite apart. Its horses are harnessed as -are no other horses in the world, since the centre -horse trots in shafts, whilst the two outside horses, -the "<i>pristashkui</i>" loose save for long traces, -gallop. Driving a troika is a special art. The driver -stands; he has a special badge, peacock's feathers -set in a round cap; he has a special name, -"<i>yamshchik</i>," and he charges quite a special price. -</p> - -<p> -To my mind, the drive out to the islands was the -one redeeming feature of these expeditions. Within -the confines of the city, the pace of the troikas -was moderate enough, but as the last scattered -houses of the suburbs merged into the forest, the -driver would call to his horses, and the two loose -horses broke into a furious gallop, the centre horse -in shafts moving as swiftly as any American -trotter. Smoothly and silently under the burnished -steel of the starlit sky, they tore over the snow, the -vague outlines of the fir trees whizzing past. Faster -and faster, until the wild excitement of it made one's -blood tingle within one, even as the bitter cold -made one's cheeks tingle, as we raced through the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P151"></a>151}</span> -keen pure air. That wild gallop through the forest -was perfectly glorious. I believe that on us sons -of the North real cold has the same exhilarating -effect that warmth and sunshine have on the -Lotos-eating dwellers by the blue Mediterranean. -</p> - -<p> -The troika would draw up at the door of a long, -low, wooden building, hidden away amongst the fir -trees of the forest. After repeated bangings at -the door, a sleepy-eyed Tartar appeared, who -ushered one into a great gaunt, bare, whitewashed -room, where other little yellow, flat-faced, Tartar -waiters were lighting countless wax candles, -bringing in many slim-shouldered, gold foil-covered -bottles of champagne, and a samovar or two, and -arranging seats. Then the gipsy troupe strolled -in, some twenty-five strong; the younger members -passably good-looking, with fine dark eyes, -abundant eyelashes, and extremely indifferent -complexions. The older members of the company made -no attempt at coquetry. They came muffled in -woollen shawls, probably to conceal toilet -deficiencies, yawning openly and undisguisedly; not -concealing their disgust at being robbed of their -sleep in order to sing to a pack of uninteresting -strangers, to whom, incidentally, they owed their -entire means of livelihood. Some ten swarthy, -evil-faced, indeterminate males with guitars filled up -the background. -</p> - -<p> -One of the younger members of the troupe would -begin a song in waltz time, in a curious metallic -voice, with a ring in it of something Eastern, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P152"></a>152}</span> -barbaric, and utterly strange to European ears, to the -thrum of the guitars of the swarthy males in the -background. The elderly females looked -inexpressibly bored, and hugged their woollen shawls -a little closer over their heads. Then the chorus -took up the refrain. A tempest of wild, nasal -melody arose, in the most perfect harmony. It -was metallic, and the din was incredible, but the -effect it produced on the listeners was astounding. -The old women, dropping their cherished shawls, -awoke to life. Their dull eyes sparkled again, they -sang madly, frenetically; like people possessed. The -un-European <i>timbre</i> of the voices conduced doubtless -to the effect, but the fact remains that this -clamour of nasal, metallic voices, singing in -exquisite harmony, had about it something so novel -and fresh—or was it something so immemorially -old?—that the listeners felt absolutely intoxicated. -</p> - -<p> -On the Russians it acted like hypnotism. After -the first song, they all joined in, and even I, the -dour and unemotional son of a Northern land, -found myself, as words and music grew familiar, -shouting the bass parts of the songs with all the -strength of my lungs. The Russian language lends -itself admirably to song, and the excess of sibilants -in it is not noticeable in singing. -</p> - -<p> -These Russian gipsies, like the Austrian bands, -produced their effects by very simple means. They -harmonised their songs themselves, and they -always introduced a succession of "sixths" or -"thirds"; emphasising the "sixth" in the tenor part. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P153"></a>153}</span> -</p> - -<p> -One can, however, have too much of a good -thing. I used to think longingly of my far-off -couch, but there was no tearing Russians away -from the gipsies. The clock ticked on; they refused -to move. The absorption of much champagne has -never afforded me the smallest amusement. The -consumption of tea has also its limits, and my -longed-for bed was so far away! The really -staggering figure one had to disburse as one's share -for these gipsy entertainments seemed to me to -be a very long price to pay for a sleepless night. -</p> - -<p> -Once a fortnight the "Queen's Messenger" left -Petrograd at noon, on his return journey to -London. On "Messenger mornings" we had all to -be at the Embassy at 9 a.m. punctually. One -morning, after a compulsory vigil with the gipsies, -I was awakened by my servant with the news that -it was close on nine, and that my sledge was already -at the door. It was impossible to dress in the -time, so after some rapid ablutions, I drew the -long felt boots the Russians call "Valinki" over -my pyjamas, put on some heavy furs, and jumped -into my sledge. Lord Dufferin found me writing -hard in the steam-heated Chancery, clad only in -silk pyjamas, and with my bare feet in slippers. -He made no remark, but I knew that nothing -ever escaped his notice. By noon we had the -despatches finished, the bags sealed up, the -"waybill" made out, various precautionary measures -taken as to which it is unnecessary to enlarge, and -the Messenger left for London. I called to the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P154"></a>154}</span> -hall porter to bring me my furs, and told him to -order my sledge round. "His Excellency has -sent your sledge home," said the porter, with a -smile lurking round the corners of his mouth. -"Then call me a hack sledge." "His Excellency -hopes that you will give him the pleasure of your -company at luncheon." "But I must go home and -dress first." "His Excellency's orders were that -you are to go as you are," answered the grinning -porter. Then I understood. Nothing is ever -gained by being shy or self-conscious, so after a -hasty toilet, I sent for my heavy fur "shuba." Furs -in Russia are intended for use, not ornament, -and this "shuba" was an extremely weighty and -voluminous garment, designed to withstand the -rigours of the North Pole itself. A glance at the -mirror convinced me that I was most indelicately -<i>décolleté</i> about the neck, so I hooked the big collar -of the "shuba" together, and strode upstairs. The -heat of this fur garment was unendurable, but -there was nothing else for it. Certainly the legs -of my pyjamas protruded below it, so I congratulated -myself on the fact that they were a brand-new -pair of very smart striped mauve silk. My -bare feet too were encased in remarkably neat -Persian slippers of green morocco. Lady Dufferin -received me exactly as though I had been dressed -in the most immaculate of frock-coats. Her -children though, gazed at my huge fur coat, -round-eyed with astonishment, for neither man nor woman -ever comes into a Russian house with furs on—an -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P155"></a>155}</span> -arrangement which would not at all suit some of -my London friends, who seem to think that furs -are designed for being shown off in hot rooms. -The governess, an elderly lady, catching sight of -my unfortunate pyjama legs below the fur coat, -assumed a highly scandalised attitude, as though -she could scarcely credit the evidence of her eyes. -(I repeat that they were exceptionally smart pyjamas.) -</p> - -<p> -During luncheon Lord Dufferin made himself -perfectly charming, and I did my best to act as -though it were quite normal to sit down to one's -repasts in an immense fur coat. -</p> - -<p> -The Ambassador was very susceptible to cold, -and liked the house heated to a great temperature. -That day the furnace-man must have been quite -unusually active, for the steam hissed and sizzled -in the radiators, until the heat of that dining-room -was suffocating. Conscious of my extreme -<i>décolletage</i>, I did not dare unhook the collar of my -"shuba," being naturally of a modest disposition, -and never, even in later years at Colombo or -Singapore, have I suffered so terribly from heat as in -that Petrograd dining-room in the depths of a -Russian winter. The only cool thing in the room -was the governess, who, when she caught sight -of my bare feet, froze into an arctic iceberg of -disdain, in spite of my really very ornamental -Persian slippers. The poor lady had obviously never -even caught a glimpse of pajamas before. After that -episode I always came to the Embassy fully dressed. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P156"></a>156}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Another instance of Lord Dufferin's methods -occurs to me. We had a large evening party at -the Embassy, and a certain very pushing and -pertinacious English newspaper correspondent did -everything in his power to get asked to this -reception. For very excellent reasons, his request was -refused. In spite of this, on the night of the party -the journalist appeared. I informed Lord Dufferin, -and asked what he wished me to do about it. "Let -me deal with him myself," answered the Ambassador, -and going up to the unbidden guest, he -made him a little bow, and said with a bland -smile, "May I inquire, sir, to what I owe this -most unexpected honour?" Then as the unhappy -newspaper-man stuttered out something, Lord -Dufferin continued with an even blander smile, "Do -not allow me, my dear sir, I beg of you, to detain -you from your other doubtless numerous engagements"; -then calling me, he added, "Will you -kindly accompany this gentleman to the front door, -and see that on a cold night like this he gets all -his warm clothing." It was really impossible to -turn a man out of your house in a more courteous -fashion. -</p> - -<p> -There was another plan Lord Dufferin used at -times. All despatches, and most of our private -letters, were sent home by hand, in charge of the -Queen's Messenger. We knew perfectly well that -anything sent from the Embassy through the -ordinary mails would be opened at the Censor's office, -and copies taken. Ministries of Foreign Affairs -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P157"></a>157}</span> -give at times "diplomatic" answers, and occasionally -it was advisable to let the Russian Government -know that the Ambassador was quite aware -that the assurances given him did not quite tally -with the actual facts. He would then write a -despatch to London to that effect, and send it by -mail, being well aware that it would be opened -and a copy sent to the Russian Ministry of Foreign -Affairs. In this indirect fashion, he delicately -conveyed to the Russian Government that he had not -been hoodwinked by the rather fanciful statements -made to him. -</p> - -<p> -I was sitting at luncheon with some friends at a -colleague's house on Sunday, the fateful 1st of -March, 1881 (March 13, new style). Suddenly our -white-headed old Chancery messenger burst -unceremoniously into the room, and called out, "The -Emperor has been assassinated!" We all jumped -up; the old man, a German-speaking Russian from -the Baltic Provinces, kept on wringing his hands, -and moaning, "Unser arme gute Kaiser! unser -arme gute Kaiser!" ("Our poor dear Emperor!") -We hurried to the Embassy as fast as we could -go, and found the Ambassador just stepping into -his carriage to get the latest news from the -Winter Palace. Lady Dufferin had not seen the actual -crime committed, but she had heard the explosion -of the bomb, and had seen the wounded horses led -past, and was terribly upset in consequence. She -was walking along the Catherine Canal with her -youngest daughter when the Emperor's carriage -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P158"></a>158}</span> -passed and the first bomb was thrown. The -carriage was one of Napoleon III's special armoured -coaches, bought after the fall of the Second French -Empire. The bomb shattered the wheels of the -carriage, but the Emperor was untouched. He -stepped out into the snow, when the second bomb -was thrown, which blew his legs to pieces, and -the Emperor was taken in a private sledge, in a -dying condition, to the Winter Palace. The bombs -had been painted white, to look like snowballs. -</p> - -<p> -Ten minutes later one of the Court Chamberlains -arrived. I met him in the hall, and he -informed me, with the tears streaming down his face, -that all was over. -</p> - -<p> -That Chamberlain was a German-Russian named -Stürmer, and he was the very same man who thirty-four -years later was destined, by his gross incompetence, -or worse, as Prime Minister, to bring -the mighty Russian Empire crashing in ruins to -the ground, and to drive the well-intentioned, -irresolute Nicholas II, the grandson of the Sovereign -for whom he professed so great an affection, to -his abdication, imprisonment, and ignominious -death. -</p> - -<p> -There was a Queen's Messenger due in Petrograd -from London that same afternoon, and Lord Dufferin, -thinking that the police might give trouble, -desired me to meet him at the station. -</p> - -<p> -The Messenger refused to believe my news. He -persisted in treating the whole thing as a joke, so -I ordered my coachman to drive through the great -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P159"></a>159}</span> -semi-circular place in front of the Winter Palace. -That place presented a wonderful sight. There -were tens of thousands of people, all kneeling -bare-headed in the snow, in close-packed ranks. I thought -the sight of those serried thousands kneeling -bare-headed, praying for the soul of their dead -Emperor, a strangely moving and beautiful spectacle. -When the Messenger saw this, and noted the -black and yellow Imperial flag waving at half-mast -over the Palace, he no longer doubted. -</p> - -<p> -The Grand Duke Vladimir had announced the -Emperor's death to the vast crowds in the -traditional Russian fashion. The words "death" or -"die" being considered ill-omened by old-fashioned -Russians, the actual sentence used by the Grand -Duke was, "The Emperor has bidden you to live -long." ("Gosudar Imperator vam prikazal dolga -jit!") The words conveyed their message. -</p> - -<p> -The body of the Emperor having been embalmed, -the funeral did not take place for a fortnight. -As the crow flies, the distance between the -Winter Palace and the Fortress Church is only -about half a mile; it was, however, still winter-time, -the Neva was frozen over, and the floating -bridges had been removed. It being contrary to -tradition to take the body of a dead Emperor of -Russia across ice, the funeral procession had to -pass over the permanent bridges to the Fortress, -a distance of about six miles. -</p> - -<p> -Lady Dufferin and I saw the procession from -the corner windows of a house on the quays. On -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P160"></a>160}</span> -paper it sounded very grand, but like so many -things in Russia, it was spoilt by lack of attention -to details. The distances were kept irregularly, -and many of the officials wore ordinary civilian -great-coats over their uniforms, which did not -enhance the effect of the <i>cortège</i>. The most striking -feature of the procession was the "Black Knight" -on foot, followed immediately by the "Golden -Knight" on horseback. These were, I believe, -meant to typify "The Angel of Death" and "The -Angel of the Resurrection." Both Knights were -clad in armour from head to foot, with the vizors -of their helmets down. The "Black Knight's" -armour was dull sooty-black all over; he had a -long black plume waving from his helmet. The -"Golden Knight," mounted on a white horse, with -a white plume in his helmet, wore gilded and -burnished armour, which blazed like a torch in the -sunlight. The weight of the black armour being -very great, there had been considerable difficulty -in finding a man sufficiently strong to walk six -miles, carrying this tremendous burden. A gigantic -young private of the Preobrajensky Guards -undertook the task for a fee of one hundred roubles, -but though he managed to accomplish the distance, -he fainted from exhaustion on reaching the -Fortress Church, and was, I heard, two months in -hospital from the effects of his effort. -</p> - -<p> -We were able to get Lady Dufferin into her -place in the Fortress Church, long before the -procession arrived, by driving across the ice of the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P161"></a>161}</span> -river. The absence of seats in a Russian church, -and the extreme length of the Orthodox liturgy, -rendered these services very trying for ladies. The -Fortress Church had been built by a Dutch -architect, and was the most un-Eastern-looking -Orthodox church I ever saw. It actually contained a -pulpit! In the north aisle of the church all the -Emperors since Peter the Great's time lie in -uniform plain white marble tombs, with gilt-bronze -Russian eagles at their four corners. The Tsars -mostly rest in the Cathedral of the Archangel, in -the Moscow Kremlin. I have before explained -that Peter was the last of the Tsars and the first -of the Emperors. The regulations for Court -mourning in Petrograd were most stringent. All -ladies had to appear in perfectly plain black, -lustreless woollen dresses, made high to the throat. On -their heads they wore a sort of Mary Queen of -Scots pointed cap of black crape, with a long black -crape veil falling to their feet. The only detail of -the funeral which struck me was the perfectly -splendid pall of cloth of gold. This pall had been -specially woven in Moscow, of threads of real gold. -When folded back during the ceremony it looked -exactly like gleaming waves of liquid gold. -</p> - -<p> -A memorial church in old-Russian style has been -erected on the Catherine Canal on the spot where -Alexander II was assassinated. The five -onion-shaped domes of this church, of copper enamelled -in stripes and spirals of crude blue and white, green -and yellow, and scarlet and white, may possibly -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P162"></a>162}</span> -look less garish in two hundred years' time than -they do at present. The severely plain Byzantine -interior, covered with archaic-looking frescoes on -a gold ground, is effective. The ikonostas is -entirely of that vivid pink and enormously costly -Siberian marble that Russians term "heavy -stone." Personally I should consider the huge sum it cost -as spent in vain. -</p> - -<p> -Edward VII and Queen Alexandra, in those -days, of course, Prince and Princess of Wales, -represented Great Britain at Alexander II's funeral, -and remained in Petrograd a month after it. -</p> - -<p> -A week after the funeral, the Prince of Wales, -by Queen Victoria's command, invested Alexander -III with the Order of the Garter. As the Garter -is the oldest Order of Chivalry in Europe, the -ceremonies at its investiture have 570 years of -tradition behind them. The insignia, the star, the -ribbon, the collar, the sword, and the actual garter -itself, are all carried on separate, long, narrow -cushions of red velvet, heavily trimmed with gold -bullion. Owing to the deep Court mourning, it -was decided that the investiture should be private. -No one was to be present except the new Emperor -and Empress, Queen Alexandra, the Grand Master -and Grand Mistress of the Russian Court, the -members of the British Embassy, and the Prince -of Wales and his staff. This, as it turned out, was -very fortunate. The ceremony was to take place -at the Anitchkoff Palace on the Nevsky, which -Alexander III inhabited throughout his reign, as -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P163"></a>163}</span> -he preferred it to the huge rambling Winter -Palace. On the appointed day, we all marched into -the great Throne room of the Anitchkoff Palace, -the Prince of Wales leading the way, with five -members of his staff carrying the insignia on the -traditional long narrow velvet cushions. I carried -nothing, but we made, I thought, a very dignified -and effective entrance. As we entered the Throne -room, a perfectly audible feminine voice cried out -in English, "Oh, my dear! Do look at them. They -look exactly like a row of wet-nurses carrying -babies!" Nothing will induce me to say from -whom the remark proceeded. The two sisters, -Empress and Queen, looked at each other for a -minute, and then exploded with laughter. The -Emperor fought manfully for a while to keep his -face, until, catching sight of the member of the -Prince of Wales's staff who was carrying his cushion -in the peculiarly maternal fashion that had so -excited the risibility of the Royal sisters, he too -succumbed, and his colossal frame quivered with mirth. -Never, I imagine, since its institution in 1349, has -the Order of the Garter been conferred amid such -general hilarity, but as no spectators were present, -this lapse from the ordinary decorum of the -ceremonial did not much matter. The general public -never heard of it, nor, I trust, did Queen Victoria. -</p> - -<p> -The Emperor Alexander III was a man of -great personal courage, but he gave way, under -protest, to the wishes of those responsible for his -personal safety. They insisted on his always using -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P164"></a>164}</span> -the armour-plated carriages bought from Napoleon -III. These coaches were so immensely heavy that -they soon killed the horses dragging them. Again, -on railway journeys, the actual time-table and route -of the Imperial train between two points was -always different from the published time-table and -route. Napoleon III's private train had been -purchased at the same time as his steel-plated carriages. -This train had been greatly enlarged and fitted to -the Russian gauge. I do not suppose that any -more sumptuous palace on wheels has ever been -built than this train of nine vestibuled cars. It -was fitted with every imaginable convenience. -Alexander III sent it to the frontier to meet his -brother-in-law the Prince of Wales, which was the -occasion on which I saw it. -</p> - -<p> -During the six months following Alexander II's -assassination all social life in Petrograd stopped. -We of the Embassy had many other resources, -for in those days the British business colony in -Petrograd was still large, and flourished exceedingly. -They had various sporting clubs, of some of -which we were members. There was in particular -the Fishing Club at Harraka Niska in Finland, -where the river Vuoksi issues from the -hundred-mile-long Lake Saima. -</p> - -<p> -It was a curious experience driving to the -Finnish railway station in Petrograd. In the city -outside, the date would be June 1, Russian style. -Inside the station, the date became June 13, -European style. In place of the baggy knickerbockers, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P165"></a>165}</span> -high boots, and fur caps of the Russian railwaymen, -the employees of the Finnish railway wore the -ordinary uniforms customary on European railways. -The tickets were printed in European, not -Russian characters, and the fares were given in -marks and pennies, instead of in roubles and -kopecks. The notices on the railway were all printed -in six languages, Finnish, Swedish, Russian, -French, English, and German, and my patriotic -feelings were gratified at noting that all the -locomotives had been built in Glasgow. I was -astonished to find that although Finland formed an -integral part of the Russian Empire, there was a -Custom House and Customs examination at the -Finnish frontier. -</p> - -<p> -Finland is a country of endless little hills, and -endless forests, all alike bestrewn with huge granite -boulders; it is also a land of endless rivers and -lakes. It is pretty in a monotonous fashion, -and looks wonderfully tidy after Russia proper. -The wooden houses and villages are all neatly -painted a chocolate brown, and in spite of its -sparse population it seems very prosperous. The -Finns are all Protestants; the educated classes are -mostly Swedish-speaking, the others talking their -own impossible Ural-Altaic language. At the -extremely comfortable club-house at Harraka Niska -none of the fishermen or boatmen could talk -anything but Finnish. We all had little conversation -books printed in Russian and Finnish, but we -usually found the language of signs more -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P166"></a>166}</span> -convenient. In later years, in South America, it -became my duty to interview daily the Legation -cook, an accomplished but extremely adipose female -from Old Spain. I had not then learnt Spanish, -and she understood no other tongue, so we -conversed by signs. It is extremely derogatory to -one's personal dignity to be forced to imitate in -succession a hen laying an egg, a sheep bleating, -or a duck quacking, and yet this was the only way -in which I could order dinner. No one who has -not tried it can believe how difficult it is to indicate -in pantomime certain comestibles, such, for -instance, as kidneys, liver and bacon, or a Welsh -rarebit. -</p> - -<p> -The fish at Harraka would not look at a fly, -and could only be hooked on a phantom-minnow. -The fishing there was very exciting. The big fish -all lay where Lake Saima debouched into the -turbulent Vuoksi river. There was a terrific rapid -there, and the boatmen, who knew every inch of -the ground, would head the boat straight for that -seething white caldron of raging waves, lashing -and roaring down the rocky gorge, as they dashed -up angry spurts of white spray. Just as it seemed -that nothing could save one from being hurled into -that mad turmoil of leaping waters, where no human -being could hope to live for a minute, a -back-current shot the boat swiftly across to the other -bank. That was the moment when the fish were -hooked. They were splendid fighters, and played -magnificently. These Harraka fish were curiously -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P167"></a>167}</span> -uniform in size, always running from 18 to 22 lb. -Though everyone called them salmon, I think -myself that they were really bull-trout, or <i>Salmo -ferox</i>. A salmon would have had to travel at -least 400 miles from salt water, and I do not -believe that any fish living could have got up the -tremendous Imatra waterfall, some six miles lower -down the Vuoksi. These fish invariably had lice -on them. In Great Britain sea-lice on a salmon -are taken as a certain indication that the fish is -fresh-run. These fish cannot possibly have been -fresh-run, so I think it probable that in these great -lakes there may be a fresh-water variety of the -parasite. Another peculiarity of the Harraka fish -was that, though they were excellent eating, they -would not keep above two days. I have myself -caught eleven of these big fellows in one day. -During June there was capital grayling fishing in -the lower Vuoksi, the fish running large, and taking -the fly readily, though in that heavy water they -were apt to break off. There were plenty of small -trout too in the Vuoksi, but the densely-wooded -banks made fishing difficult, and the water was -always crystal-clear, and needed the finest of -tackle. -</p> - -<p> -I spent some most enjoyable days at Koltesha, -a small English shooting-club of ten members, -about twenty miles out of Petrograd. During -September, for one fortnight, the marshes round -Koltesha were alive with "double-snipe." This bird -migrates in thousands from the Arctic regions to -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P168"></a>168}</span> -the far South, at the approach of autumn. They -alighted in the Koltesha marshes to recruit -themselves after their journey from the North Pole, -and owing to circumstances beyond their control, -few of them continued their journey southward. -This confiding fowl has never learnt to zig-zag -like the other members of the snipe family, and -they paid the penalty for this omission by usually -proceeding to the kitchen. A "double-snipe" is -most delicious eating. The winter shooting at -Koltesha was most delightful. The art of -"ski-walking" had first to be learnt, and on commencing -this unaccustomed method of locomotion, various -muscles, which its use called into play for the first -time, showed their resentment by aching furiously. -The ground round Koltesha being hilly was admirably -adapted for coasting on ski. It was difficult -at first to shoot from the insecure footing of ski, -and the unusual amount of clothing between one's -shoulder and the stock of one's gun did not -facilitate matters. Everything, however, can be -learnt in time. I can claim to be the pioneer -of ski on the American Continent, for in -January, 1887, I brought over to Canada the very first -pair of ski ever seen in America. I used to coast -down the toboggan slides at Ottawa on them, amidst -universal derision. I was told that, however useful -ski might be in Russia, they were quite unsuited to -Canadian conditions, and would never be popular -there, as the old-fashioned "raquettes" were -infinitely superior. Humph! <i>Qui vivra verra!</i> -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P169"></a>169}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Koltesha abounded in black game, "ryabchiks," -or hazel-grouse, and ptarmigan. Russian hares -turn snow-white in winter, and are very difficult -to see against a snowy background in consequence. -It is almost impossible to convey on paper any -idea of the intense delight of those days in the -sun and the cold, when the air had that delicious -clean smell that always goes with intense frost, -the dark fir woods, with their purple shadows, stood -out in sharp contrast to the dazzling sheet of white -snow, and the sunlight gilded the patches of oak -and birch scrub that climbed down the hollows of -the low hills. One returned home glowing from -head to foot. We got larger game too by "ringing -them." The process of "ringing" is as follows. -No four-footed creature can travel over the snow -without leaving his tracks behind him. Let us -suppose a small wood, one mile in circumference. -If a man travels round this on ski, and if the -track of any animal crosses his trail, going <i>into</i> -the wood, and this track does not again come <i>out</i> -of the wood, it is obvious that that particular -animal is still taking cover there. Measures to drive -him out are taken accordingly. We got in this -way at Koltesha quite a number of elks, lynxes, -and wolves. -</p> - -<p> -The best wolf-shooting I ever got was at the -invitation of the Russian Minister of Finance. -Great packs of these ravenous brutes were playing -havoc on his estate, two hundred miles from -Petrograd, so he invited a large shooting party to his -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P170"></a>170}</span> -country house. We travelled down in a private -sleeping-car, and had over twenty miles to drive -in rough country sledges from the station. One -of the guests was an enormously fat Russian -General, a perfect mammoth of a man. As I was very -slim in those days, I was told off as this gigantic -warrior's fellow-passenger. Although he took up -nine-tenths of the sledge, I just managed to creep -in, but every time we jolted—and as the track -was very rough, this was pretty frequently—I got -250 lb. of Russian General on the top of me, -squeezing the life out of me. He was a good-natured -Colossus, and apologised profusely for his -own obesity, and for his instability, but I was black -and blue all over, and since that day I have felt -profound sympathy for the little princes in the -Tower, for I know what being smothered with a -feather-bed feels like. -</p> - -<p> -The Minister's country house was, as are most -other Russian country houses, a modest wooden -building with whitewashed rooms very scantily -furnished. The Minister had, however, thoughtfully -brought down his famous Petrograd chef, and I -should judge about three-quarters of the contents -of his wine-cellar. We had to proceed to our -places in the forest in absolute silence, and the -wolf being an exceedingly wary animal with a -a very keen sense of smell, all smoking was -rigorously prohibited. -</p> - -<p> -It was nice open scrubland, undulating gently. -The beaters were skilful and we were very lucky, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P171"></a>171}</span> -for after an interminable wait, the entire pack of -wolves rushed down on us. A wolf is killed with -slugs from a smooth-bore. I personally was -fortunate, for I got shots at eight wolves, and six -of them felt disinclined for further exertions. I -still have a carriage-rug made of the skins of the -wolves I killed that day. The banging all round -meanwhile was terrific. In two days we accounted -for fifty-two of these pests. It gave me the utmost -pleasure killing these murderous, bloodthirsty -brutes; far more than slaying an inoffensive bear. -Should a bear encounter a human being in the -course of his daily walks, he is certainly apt to -hug him to death, as a precautionary measure. -He is also addicted to smashing to a jelly, with -one blow of his powerful paws, the head of a -chance stranger. These peculiarities apart, the -bear may be regarded as practically harmless. It -is otherwise with the wolf. -</p> - -<p> -Some of the British Colony were fond of going -to Finland for a peculiar form of sport. I use the -last word dubiously, for to kill any game birds -during the breeding season seems a curiously -unsportsmanlike act. Circumstances rather excused -this. It is well known that black game do not -pair, but that they are polygamous. During the -breeding season the male birds meet every morning -at dawn on regular fighting grounds, and there -battle for the attentions of the fairer sex. These -fighting grounds are well known to the keepers, who -erect there in early autumn conical shelters of fir -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P172"></a>172}</span> -branches. The birds become familiar with these -shelters (called in Russian "shagashki") and pay -no attention to them. The "gun" introduces -himself into the shelter not later than midnight, and -there waits patiently for the first gleam of dawn. -He must on no account smoke. With the first -grey streak of dawn in the sky there is a great -rushing of wings in the air, and dozens of male -birds appear from nowhere; strutting up and -down, puffing out their feathers, and hissing -furiously at each other in challenge. The grey hens -meanwhile sit in the surrounding trees, watching, -as did the ladies of old at a tournament, the -prowess of their men-folk in the lists. The grey hens -never show themselves, and make no sound; two -things, one would imagine, contrary to every instinct -of their sex. A challenge once accepted, two -males begin fighting furiously with wings, claws, -and beaks. So absorbed are the birds in their -combat, that they neither see nor hear anything, and -pay no attention to a gun-shot. Should they be -within reach of the "shagashka," that is the time -to fire. It sounds horribly unsportsmanlike, but it -must be remembered that the birds are only just -visible in the uncertain dawn. As dawn matures -into daylight, the birds suddenly stop fighting, and -all fly away simultaneously, followed by the grey -hens. I never would kill more than two as specimens, -for this splendid bird is such a thing of joy -in his breeding plumage, with his glossy dark blue -satin coat, and white velvet waistcoat, that there -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P173"></a>173}</span> -is some excuse for wanting to examine him closer. -Ladies, too, loved a blackcock's tail or wings for -their hats. It was also the only way in which -this curious and little-known phase of bird life -could be witnessed. -</p> - -<p> -The capercailzie is called in Russian "the deaf -one." Why this name should be given to a bird -of abnormally acute hearing seems at first sight -puzzling. The explanation is that the male -capercailzie in the breeding season concludes his -love-song with a peculiar "tchuck, tchuck," impossible -to reproduce on paper, moving his head rapidly -to and fro the while. During this "tchuck, tchuck," -the bird is deaf and blind to the world. The -capercailzie hunter goes out into the forest at about -1 a.m. and listens intently. As soon as he hears -a capercailzie's song, he moves towards the sound -very, very cautiously. When within half a mile of -the bird, he must wait for the "tchuck, tchuck," -which lasts about two minutes, before daring to -advance. The "tchuck" over, he must remain -absolutely motionless until it recommences. The -snapping of a twig will be enough to silence the bird -and to make it fly away. It will be seen then that -to approach a capercailzie is a difficult task, and -one requiring infinite patience. Once within shot, -there is no particular fun in shooting a sitting bird -the size of a turkey, up at the top of a tree, even -though it only appears as a dusky mass against the -faint beginnings of dawn. -</p> - -<p> -The real charm of this blackcock and capercailzie -shooting was that one would not otherwise have -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P174"></a>174}</span> -been out in the great forest at break of day. -</p> - -<p> -To me there was always an infinite fascination -in seeing these great Northern tracts of woodland -awakening from their long winter sleep. The -sweetness of the dawn, the delicious smell of -growing things, the fresh young life springing up under -one's feet, all these appealed to every fibre in my -being. Nature always restores the balance of -things. In Russia, as in Canada, after the rigours -of the winter, once the snow has disappeared, flowers -carpet the ground with a rapidity of growth -unknown in more temperate climates. These Finland -woods were covered with a low creeping plant with -masses of small, white, waxy flowers. It was, I -think, one of the smaller cranberries. There was -an orange-flowering nettle, too, the leaves of which -changed from green to vivid purple as they climbed -the stalk, making gorgeous patches of colour, and -great drifts of blue hepaticas on the higher ground. -To appreciate Nature properly, she must be seen -at unaccustomed times, as she bestirs herself after -her night's rest whilst the sky brightens. -</p> - -<p> -In Petrograd itself the British Colony found -plenty of amusement. We had an English -ice-hill club to which all the Embassy belonged. The -elevation of a Russian ice-hill, some forty feet -only, may seem tame after the imposing heights of -Canadian toboggan slides, but I fancy that the -pace travelled is greater in Russia. The ice-hills -were always built in pairs, about three hundred -yards apart, with two parallel runs. Both hills -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P175"></a>175}</span> -and runs were built of solid blocks of ice, watered -every day, and the pitch of the actual hill was -very steep. In the place of a toboggan we used -little sleds two feet long, mounted on skate-runners, -which were kept constantly sharpened. These -travelled over the ice at a tremendous pace, and -at the end of the straight run, the corresponding -hill had only to be mounted to bring you home -again to the starting-point. The art of steering -these sleds was soon learnt, once the elementary -principle was grasped that after a turn to the left, -a corresponding turn to the right must be made -to straighten up the machine, exactly as is done -instinctively on a bicycle. A wave of the hand or -of the foot was enough to change the direction, -the ice-hiller going down head foremost, with the -sled under his chest. -</p> - -<p> -Longer sleds were used for taking ladies down. -The man sat cross-legged in front, whilst the lady -knelt behind him with both her arms round his -neck. Possibly the enforced familiarity of this -attitude was what made the amusement so popular. -</p> - -<p> -We gave at times evening parties at the -ice-hills, when the woods were lit up with rows of -Chinese lanterns, making a charming effect against -the snow, and electric arcs blazed from the summits -of the slides. To those curious in such matters, -I may say that as secondary batteries had not then -been invented, and we had no dynamo, power was -furnished direct by powerful Grove two-cell -batteries. One night our amateur electrician was -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P176"></a>176}</span> -nearly killed by the brown fumes of nitrous acid -these batteries give off from their negative cells. -</p> - -<p> -We had an ice-boat on the Gulf of Finland as -well. It is only in early spring, and very seldom -then, that this amusement can be indulged in. The -necessary conditions are (1) a heavy thaw to melt -all the snow from the surface of the ice, followed -by a sharp frost; (2) a strong breeze. Nature -is not often obliging enough to arrange matters -in this sequence. We had some good sailing, -though, and could get forty miles an hour out of -our craft with a decent breeze. Our boat was of -the Dutch, not the Canadian type. I was astonished -to find how close an ice-boat could lay to the -wind, for obviously anything in the nature of -leeway is impossible with a boat on runners. -Ice-sailing was bitterly cold work, and the navigation -of the Gulf of Finland required great caution, for -in early spring great cracks appeared in the ice. -On one occasion, in avoiding a large crack, we -ran into the omnibus plying on runners between -Kronstadt and the mainland. The driver of the -coach was drunk, and lost his head, to the terror -of his passengers, but very little damage was done. -It may be worth while recording this, as it is but -seldom that a boat collides with an omnibus. -</p> - -<p> -It will be seen that in one way and another -there was no lack of amusement to be found -round Petrograd, even during the entire cessation -of Court and social entertainments. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap06"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P177"></a>177}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER VI -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Love of Russians for children's games—Peculiarities of -Petrograd balls—Some famous beauties of Petrograd Society—The -varying garb of hired waiters—Moscow—Its wonderful -beauty—The forest of domes—The Kremlin—The three -famous "Cathedrals"—The Imperial Treasury—The -Sacristy—The Palace—Its splendour—The Terem—A -Gargantuan Russian dinner—An unusual episode at the French -Ambassador's ball—Bombs—Tsarskoe Selo—Its -interior—Extraordinary collection of curiosities in Tsarskoe -Park—Origin of term "Vauxhall" for railway station in -Russia—Peterhof—Charm of park there—Two Russian -illusions—A young man of 25 delivers an Ultimatum to -Russia—How it came about—M. de Giers—Other Foreign -Ministers—Paraguay—The polite Japanese dentist—A visit to -Gatchina—Description of the Palace—Delights of the -children's play-room there. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -The lingering traces of the child which are found -in most Russian natures account probably for their -curious love of indoor games. Lady Dufferin had -weekly evening parties during Lent, when dancing -was rigidly prohibited. Quite invariably, some -lady would go up to her and beg that they might -be allowed to play what she would term "English -running games." So it came about that -bald-headed Generals, covered with Orders, and quite -elderly ladies, would with immense glee play "Blind-man's -buff," "Musical chairs," "Hunt the slipper," -and "General post." I believe that they would -have joined cheerfully in "Ring a ring of roses," -had we only thought of it. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P178"></a>178}</span> -</p> - -<p> -I think it is this remnant of the child in them -which, coupled with their quick-working brains, -wonderful receptivity, and absolute naturalness, -makes Russians of the upper class so curiously -attractive. -</p> - -<p> -At balls in my time, oddly enough, quadrilles -were the most popular dances. There was always -a "leader" for these quadrilles, whose function -it was to invent new and startling figures. The -"leader" shouted out his directions from the -centre of the room, and however involved the figures -he devised, however complicated the manoeuvres he -evolved, he could rely on being implicitly obeyed by -the dancers, who were used to these intricate -entanglements, and enjoyed them. Woe betide the -"leader" should he lose his head, or give a wrong -direction! He would find two hundred people -inextricably tangled up. I calculate that many -years have been taken off my own life by the -responsibilities thrust upon me by being frequently -made to officiate in this capacity. Balls in Petrograd -in the "'eighties" invariably concluded with the -"Danse Anglaise," our own familiar "Sir Roger -de Coverley." -</p> - -<p> -I never saw an orchestra at a ball in Petrograd, -except at the Winter Palace. All Russians -preferred a pianist, but a pianist of a quite special -brand. These men, locally known as "tappeurs," -cultivated a peculiar style of playing, and could -get wonderful effects out of an ordinary grand -piano. There was in particular one absolute genius -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P179"></a>179}</span> -called Altkein. Under his superlatively skilled -fingers the piano took on all the resonance and -varied colour of a full orchestra. Altkein told -me that he always played what he called -"four-handed," that is doubling the parts of each hand. -By the end of the evening he was absolutely -exhausted. -</p> - -<p> -The most beautiful woman in Petrograd Society -was unquestionably Countess Zena Beauharnais, -afterwards Duchess of Leuchtenberg; a tall, queenly -blonde with a superb figure. Nature had been -very generous to her, for in addition to her -wonderful beauty, she had a glorious soprano voice. I -could not but regret that she and her sister, -Princess Bieloselskava, had not been forced by -circumstances to earn their living on the operatic stage, -for the two sisters, soprano and contralto, would -certainly have achieved a European reputation with -their magnificent voices. How they would have -played Amneris and the title-rôle in "Aïda"! The -famous General Skobeleff was their brother. -</p> - -<p> -Two other strikingly beautiful women were -Princess Kitty Dolgorouki, a piquant little brunette, -and her sister-in-law, winning, golden-haired -Princess Mary Dolgorouki. After a lapse of nearly -forty years, I may perhaps be permitted to express -my gratitude to these two charming ladies for -the consistent kindness they showered on a -peculiarly uninteresting young man, and I should like -to add to their names that of Countess Betsy -Schouvaloff. I may remark that the somewhat -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P180"></a>180}</span> -homely British forms of their baptismal names -which these <i>grandes dames</i> were fond of adopting -always amused me. Our two countries were in -theory deadly enemies, yet they borrowed little -details from us whenever they could. I think that -the racial animosity was only skin-deep. This -custom of employing English diminutives for Russian -names extended to the men too, for Prince -Alexander Dolgorouki, Princess Kitty's husband, was -always known as "Sandy," whilst Countess Betsy's -husband was invariably spoken of as "Bobby" -Schouvaloff. Countess Betsy, mistress of one of the -stateliest houses in Petrograd, was acknowledged -to be the best-dressed woman in Russia. I never -noticed whether she were really good-looking or not, -for such was the charm of her animation, and the -sparkle of her vivacity and quick wit, that one -remarked the outer envelope less than the nimble -intellect and extraordinary attractiveness that -underlay it. She was a daughter of that "Princesse -Château" to whom I referred earlier in these -reminiscences. -</p> - -<p> -In the great Russian houses there were far -fewer liveried servants than is customary in other -European countries. This was due to the -difficulty of finding sufficiently trained men. The -actual work of the house was done by hordes of -bearded, red-shirted shaggy-headed moujiks, who -their household duties over, retired to their -underground fastnesses. Consequently when dinners or -other entertainments were given recourse was had -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P181"></a>181}</span> -to hired waiters, mostly elderly Germans. It was -the curious custom to dress these waiters up in -the liveries of the family giving the entertainment. -The liveries seldom fitted, and the features of the -old waiters were quite familiar to most of us, yet -politeness dictated that we should pretend to -consider them as servants of the house. Though -perfectly conscious of having seen the same individual -who, arrayed in orange and white, was standing -behind one's chair, dressed in sky-blue only two -evenings before, and equally aware of the -probability of meeting him the next evening in a -different house, clad in crimson, it was considered polite -to compliment the mistress of the house on the -admirable manner in which her servants were turned -out. -</p> - -<p> -There is in all Russian houses a terrible place -known as the "buffetnaya." This is a combination -of pantry, larder, and serving-room. People -at all particular about the cleanliness of their food, -or the nicety with which it is served, should avoid -this awful spot as they would the plague. A -sensitive nose can easily locate the whereabouts of -the "buffetnaya" from a considerable distance. -</p> - -<p> -From Petrograd to Moscow is only a twelve -hours' run, but in those twelve hours the traveller -is transported into a different world. After the -soulless regularity of Peter the Great's sham -classical creation on the banks of the Neva, the beauty -of the semi-Oriental ancient capital comes as a -perfect revelation. Moscow, glowing with colour, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P182"></a>182}</span> -is seated like Rome on gentle hills, and numbers -over three hundred churches. These churches have -each the orthodox five domes, and this forest of -domes, many of them gilt, others silvered, some blue -and gold, or striped with bands and spirals of vivid -colour, when seen amongst the tender greenery of -May, forms a wonderful picture, unlike anything -else in the world. The winding, irregular streets -lined with buildings in every imaginable style of -architecture, and of every possible shade of colour; -the remains of the ancient city walls with their -lofty watch-towers crowned with curious conical -roofs of grass-green tiles; the great irregular bulk -of the Kremlin, towering over all; make a whole -of incomparable beauty. There is in the world but -one Moscow, as there is but one Venice, and one -Oxford. -</p> - -<p> -The great sea of gilded and silvered domes is -best seen from the terrace of the Kremlin overlooking -the river, though the wealth of detail nearer -at hand is apt to distract the eye. The soaring -snow-white shaft of Ivan Veliki's tower with its -golden pinnacles dominates everything, though the -three "Cathedrals," standing almost side by side, -hallowed by centuries of tradition, are very sacred -places to a Russian, who would consider them the -heart of Moscow, and of the Muscovite world. -"Mother Moscow," they call her affectionately, and -I understand it. -</p> - -<p> -The Russian word "Sobor" is wrongly translated -as "Cathedral." A "sobor" is merely a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P183"></a>183}</span> -church of peculiar sanctity or of special dignity. -The three gleaming white, gold-domed churches -of the Kremlin are of quite modest dimensions, -yet their venerable walls are rich with the -associations of centuries. In the Church of the -Assumption the Tsars, and later the Emperors, were all -crowned; in the Church of the Archangel the -Tsars were buried, though the Emperors lie in -Petrograd. The dim Byzantine interior of the -Assumption Church, with its faded frescoes on a -gold ground, and its walls shimmering with gold, -silver, and jewels, is immensely impressive. Here -is the real Russia, not the Petrograd stuccoed -veneered Russia of yesterday, but ancient -Muscovy, sending its roots deep down into the past. -</p> - -<p> -Surely Peter prepared the way for the destruction -of his country by uprooting this tree of ancient -growth, and by trying to create in one short -lifetime a new pseudo-European Empire, with a -new capital. -</p> - -<p> -The city should be seen from the Kremlin -terrace as the light is fading from the sky and the -thousands of church-bells clash out their melodious -evening hymn. The Russians have always -been master bell-founders, and their bells have a -silvery tone unknown in Western Europe. In the -gloaming, the Eastern character of the city is much -more apparent. The blaze of colour has vanished, -and the dusky silhouettes of the church domes -take on the onion-shaped forms of the Orient. -Delhi, as seen in later years from the fort at -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P184"></a>184}</span> -sunset was curiously reminiscent of Moscow. -</p> - -<p> -I do not suppose that more precious things -have ever been gathered together under one roof -than the Imperial Treasury at Moscow contained -in those days. The eye got surfeited with the -sight of so many splendours, and I can only recall -the great collection of crowns and thrones of the -various Tsars. One throne of Persian workmanship -was studded with two thousand diamonds and -rubies; another, also from Persia, contained over -two thousand large turquoises. There must have -been at least a dozen of these glittering thrones, -but the most interesting of all was the original -ivory throne of the Emperors of Byzantium, brought -to Moscow in 1472 by Sophia Palaeologus, wife of -Ivan III. Constantine the Great may have sat -on that identical throne. It seems curious that the -finest collection in the world of English silver-ware -of Elizabeth's, James I's, and Charles I's time -should be found in the Kremlin at Moscow, till it is -remembered that nearly all the plate of that date in -England was melted down during the Civil War of -1642-1646. I wonder what has become of all -these precious things now! -</p> - -<p> -The sacristy contains an equally wonderful -collection of Church plate. I was taken over this by -an Archimandrite, and I had been previously warned -that he would expect a substantial tip for his services. -The Archimandrite's feelings were, however, to be -spared by my representing this tip as my contribution -to the poor of his parish. The Archimandrite -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P185"></a>185}</span> -was so immensely imposing, with his violet robes, -diamond cross, and long flowing beard, that I felt -quite shy of offering him the modest five roubles -which I was told would be sufficient. So I doubled -it. The Archimandrite pocketed it joyfully, and so -moved was he by my unexpected <i>largesse</i>, that the -excellent ecclesiastic at once motioned me to my -knees, and gave me a most fervent blessing, which -I am persuaded was well worth the extra five -roubles. -</p> - -<p> -The Great Palace of the Kremlin was rebuilt by -Nicholas I about 1840. It consequently belongs -to the "period of bad taste"; in spite of that it is -extraordinarily sumptuous. The St. George's Hall -is 200 feet long and 60 feet high; the other great -halls, named after the Russian Orders of Chivalry, -are nearly as large. Each of these is hung with -silk of the same colour as the ribbon of the Order; -St. George's Hall, orange and black; St. Andrew's -Hall, sky-blue; St. Alexander Nevsky's, -pink; St. Catherine's, red and white. I imagine -that every silkworm in the world must have been -kept busy for months in order to prepare sufficient -material for these acres of silk-hung walls. -The Kremlin Palace may not be in the best of -taste, but these huge halls, with their jasper and -malachite columns and profuse gilding, are -wonderfully gorgeous, and exactly correspond with -one's preconceived ideas of what an Emperor of -Russia's palace ought to be like. There is a chapel -in the Kremlin Palace with the quaint title of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P186"></a>186}</span> -"The Church of the Redeemer behind the Golden -Railing." -</p> - -<p> -The really interesting portion of the Palace is the -sixteenth century part, known as the "Terem." These -small, dim, vaulted halls with their half-effaced -frescoes on walls and ceilings are most -fascinating. It is all mediæval, but not with the -mediævalism of Western Europe; neither is it -Oriental; it is pure Russian; simple, dignified, and -delightfully archaic. One could not imagine the -old Tsars in a more appropriate setting. -Compared with the strident splendours of the modern -palace, the vaulted rooms of the old Terem seem -to typify the difference between Petrograd and -Moscow. -</p> - -<p> -It so happened that later in life I was destined -to become very familiar with the deserted palace -at Agra, in India, begun by Akbar, finished by -Shah Jehan. How different the Oriental conception -of a palace is from the Western! The Agra -Palace is a place of shady courts and gardens, -dotted with exquisitely graceful pavilions of -transparent white marble roofed with gilded copper. -No two of these pavilions are similar, and in their -varied decorations an inexhaustible invention is -shown. The white marble is so placed that it is -seen everywhere in strong contrast to Akbar's -massive buildings of red sandstone. During the -Coronation ceremonies, King-Emperor George V seated -himself, of right, on the Emperor Akbar's throne in -the great Hall of Audience in Agra Palace. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P187"></a>187}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Though Moscow may appear a dream-city when -viewed from the Kremlin, it is an eminently -practical city as well. It was, in my time, the chief -manufacturing centre of Russia, and Moscow -business-men had earned the reputation of being well -able to look after themselves. -</p> - -<p> -Another side of the life of the great city could -be seen in the immense Ermitage restaurant, where -Moscow people assured you with pride that the -French cooking was only second to Paris. The -little Tartar waiters at the Ermitage were, drolly -enough, dressed like hospital orderlies, in white -linen from head to foot. There might possibly be -money in an antiseptic restaurant, should some -enterprising person start one. The idea would -be novel, and this is an age when new ideas seem -attractive. -</p> - -<p> -A Russian merchant in Moscow, a partner in -an English firm, imagined himself to be under a -great debt of gratitude to the British Embassy in -Petrograd, on account of a heavy fine imposed -upon him, which we had succeeded in getting -remitted. This gentleman was good enough to invite -a colleague and myself to dine at a certain -"Traktir," celebrated for its Russian cooking. I was -very slim in those days, but had I had any idea -of the Gargantuan repast we were supposed to -assimilate, I should have borrowed a suit of clothes -from the most adipose person of my acquaintance, -in order to secure additional cargo-space. -</p> - -<p> -In the quaint little "Traktir" decorated in -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P188"></a>188}</span> -old-Russian style, after the usual fresh caviar, raw -herrings, pickled mushrooms, and smoked sturgeon -of the "zakuska," we commenced with cold sucking-pig -eaten with horse-radish. Then followed a plain -little soup, composed of herrings and cucumbers -stewed in sour beer. Slices of boiled salmon and -horse-radish were then added, and the soup was -served iced. This soup is distinctly an acquired -taste. This was succeeded by a simple dish of -sterlets, boiled in wine, with truffles, crayfish, and -mushrooms. After that came mutton stuffed with -buckwheat porridge, pies of the flesh and isinglass -of the sturgeon, and Heaven only knows what else. -All this accompanied by red and white Crimean -wines, Kvass, and mead. I had always imagined -that mead was an obsolete beverage, indulged in -principally by ancient Britons, and drunk for choice -out of their enemies' skulls, but here it was, -foaming in beautiful old silver tankards; and perfectly -delicious it was! Oddly enough, the Russian name -for it, "meod," is almost identical with ours. -</p> - -<p> -Only once in my life have I suffered so terribly -from repletion, and that was in the island of -Barbados, at the house of a hospitable planter. We -sat down to luncheon at one, and rose at five. The -sable serving-maids looked on the refusal of a dish -as a terrible slur on the cookery of the house, and -would take no denial. "No, you like dis, sar, it -real West India dish. I gib you lilly piece." What -with turtle, and flying-fish, and calipash and -calipee, and pepper-pot, and devilled land-crabs, I -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P189"></a>189}</span> -felt like the boa-constrictor in the Zoological -Gardens after his monthly meal. -</p> - -<p> -I was not fortunate enough to witness the -coronation of either Alexander III or that of Nicholas -II. In the perfect setting of "the Red Staircase," -of the ancient stone-built hall known as the -"Granovitaya Palata," and of the "Gold Court," the -ceremonial must be deeply impressive. On no stage -could more picturesque surroundings possibly be -devised. During the coronation festivities, most -of the Ambassadors hired large houses in -Moscow, and transferred their Embassies to the old -capital for three weeks. At the coronation of -Nicholas II, of unfortunate memory, the French -Ambassador, the Comte de Montebello, took a -particularly fine house in Moscow, the Shérémaitieff -Palace, and it was arranged that he should give -a great ball the night after the coronation, at -which the newly-crowned Emperor and Empress -would be present. The French Government own -a wonderful collection of splendid old French -furniture, tapestries, and works of art, known as the -"Garde Meubles." Under the Monarchy and Empire, -these all adorned the interiors of the various -palaces. To do full honour to the occasion, the -French Government dispatched vanloads of the -choicest treasures of the "Garde Meubles" to -Moscow, and the Shérémaitieff Palace became a thing -of beauty, with Louis Quatorze Gobelins, and -furniture made for Marie-Antoinette. To enhance the -effect, the Comte and Comtesse de Montebello -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P190"></a>190}</span> -arranged the most elaborate floral decorations, and -took immense pains over them. On the night of -the ball, two hours before their guests were due, -the Ambassador was informed that the Chief of -Police was outside and begged for permission to -enter the temporary Embassy. Embassies enjoying -what is known as "exterritoriality," none of the -police can enter except on the invitation of the -Ambassador; much as vampires, according to the -legend, could only secure entrance to a house at -the personal invitation of the owner. It will be -remembered that these unpleasing creatures -displayed great ingenuity in securing this permission; -indeed the really expert vampires prided themselves -on the dexterity with which they could inveigle -their selected victim into welcoming them joyfully -into his domicile. The Chief of Police informed -the French Ambassador that he had absolutely -certain information that a powerful bomb had been -introduced into the Embassy, concealed in a flower-pot. -M. de Montebello was in a difficult position. -On the previous day the Ambassador had discovered -that every single electric wire in the house -had been deliberately severed by some unknown -hand. French electricians had repaired the damage, -but it was a disquieting incident in the -circumstances. The policeman was positive that his -information was correct, and the consequences of a -terrific bomb exploding in one's house are eminently -disagreeable, so he gave his reluctant permission -to have the Embassy searched, though his earlier -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P191"></a>191}</span> -guests might be expected within an hour. Armies -of police myrmidons appeared, and at once -proceeded to unpot between two and three thousand -growing plants, and to pick all the floral -decorations to pieces. Nothing whatever was found, but -it would be unreasonable to expect secret police, -however zealous, to exhibit much skill as trained -florists. They made a frightful hash of things, -and not only ruined the elaborate decorations, but -so managed to cover the polished floors with earth -that the rooms looked like ploughed fields, dancing -was rendered impossible, and poor Madame de -Montebello was in tears. As the guests arrived, -the police had to be smuggled out through back -passages. This was one of the little amenities of -life in a bomb-ridden land. -</p> - -<p> -During the summer months I was much at Tsarskoe -Selo. Tsarskoe is only fourteen miles from -Petrograd, and some of my Russian friends had -villas there. The gigantic Old Palace of Tsarskoe -is merely an enlarged Winter Palace, and though -its garden façade is nearly a quarter of a mile -long, it is uninteresting and unimpressive, being -merely an endless repetition of the same details. I -was taken over the interior several times, but such -a vast quantity of rooms leaves only a confused -impression of magnificence. I only recall the really -splendid staircase and the famous lapis-lazuli and -amber rooms. The lapis-lazuli room is a blaze of -blue and gold, with walls, furniture, and -chandeliers encrusted with that precious substance. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P192"></a>192}</span> -The amber room is perfectly beautiful. All the -walls, cabinets, and tables are made of amber -of every possible shade, from straw-colour to deep -orange. There are also great groups of figures -carved entirely out of amber. Both the lapis and -the amber room have curious floors of black ebony -inlaid with mother-of-pearl, forming a very effective -colour scheme. I have vague memories of the -"gold" and "silver" rooms, but very distinct -recollections of the bedroom of one of the Empresses, -who a hundred years before the late Lord Lister -had discovered the benefits of antiseptic surgery -had with some curious prophetic instinct had her -sleeping-room constructed on the lines of a -glorified modern operating theatre. The walls of this -quaint apartment were of translucent opal glass, -decorated with columns of bright purple glass, with -a floor of inlaid mother-of-pearl. Personally, I -should always have fancied a faint smell of -chloroform lingering about the room. -</p> - -<p> -Catherine the Great had her monogram placed -everywhere at Tsarskoe Selo, on doors, walls, and -ceilings. It was difficult to connect her with the -interlaced "E's," until one remembered that the -Russian form of the name is "Ekaterina." How -wise the Russians have been in retaining the -so-called Cyrillian alphabet in writing their tongue! -</p> - -<p> -In other Slavonic languages, such as Polish and -Czech, where the Roman alphabet has been adopted, -unholy combinations of "cz," "zh," and "sz" have -to be resorted to to reproduce sounds which the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P193"></a>193}</span> -Cyrillian alphabet could express with a single -letter; and the tragic thing is that, be the letters -piled together never so thickly, they invariably fail -to give the foreigner the faintest idea of how the -word should really be pronounced. Take the -much-talked-of town of Przemysl, for instance. -</p> - -<p> -The park of Tsarskoe is eighteen miles in -circumference, and every portion of it is thrown open -freely to the public. In spite of being quite flat, -it is very pretty with its lake and woods, and was -most beautifully kept. To an English eye its -trees seemed stunted, for in these far Northern -regions no forest trees attain great size. Limes -and oaks flourish moderately well, but the climate -is too cold for beeches. At the latitude of Petrograd -neither apples, pears, nor any kind of fruit tree -can be grown; raspberries and strawberries are the -only things that can be produced, and they are -both superlatively good. The park at Tsarskoe -was full of a jumble of the most extraordinarily -incongruous buildings and monuments; it would -have taken a fortnight to see them all properly. -There was a Chinese village, a Chinese theatre, -a Dutch dairy, an English Gothic castle, temples, -hanging gardens, ruins, grottoes, fountains, and -numbers of columns, triumphal arches, and statues. -On the lake there was a collection of boats of all -nations, varying from a Chinese sampan to an -English light four-oar; from a Venetian gondola to a -Brazilian catamaran. There was also a fleet of -miniature men-of-war, and three of Catherine's great -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P194"></a>194}</span> -gilt state-barges on the lake. One arm of the lake -was spanned by a bridge of an extremely rare blue -Siberian marble. Anyone seeing the effect of this -blue marble bridge must have congratulated himself -on the fact that it was extremely improbable that -any similar bridge would ever be erected elsewhere, -so rare was the material of which it was constructed. -</p> - -<p> -I never succeeded in finding the spot in Tsarskoe -Park where a sentry stands on guard over a violet -which Catherine the Great once found there. -Catherine, finding the first violet of spring, ordered a -sentry to be placed over it, to protect the flower -from being plucked. She forgot to rescind the -order, and the sentry continued to be posted there. -It developed at last into a regular tradition of -Tsarskoe, and so, day and night, winter and summer, -a sentry stood in Tsarskoe Park over a spot where, -150 years before, a violet once grew. -</p> - -<p> -The Russian name for a railway station is "Vauxhall," -and the origin of this is rather curious. The -first railway in Europe opened for passenger -traffic was the Liverpool and Manchester, inaugurated -in 1830. Five years later, Nicholas I, eager to -show that Russia was well abreast of the times, -determined to have a railway of his own, and ordered -one to be built between Petrograd and Tsarskoe -Selo, a distance of fourteen miles. The railway -was opened in 1837, without any intermediate -stations. Unfortunately, with the exception of a few -Court officials, no one ever wanted to go to Tsarskoe, -so the line could hardly be called a commercial -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P195"></a>195}</span> -success. Then someone had a brilliant idea! -Vauxhall Gardens in South London were then at the -height of their popularity. The Tsarskoe line should -be extended two miles to a place called Pavlosk, -where the railway company would be given fifty -acres of ground on which to construct a "Vauxhall -Gardens," outbidding its London prototype in -attractions. No sooner said than done! The -Pavlosk "Vauxhall" became enormously popular -amongst Petrogradians in summer-time; the trains -were crowded and the railway became a paying -proposition. As the Tsarskoe station was the only -one then in existence in Petrograd, the worthy -citizens got into the habit of directing their own -coachmen or cabdrivers simply to go "to Vauxhall." So -the name got gradually applied to the actual station -building in Petrograd. When the Nicholas railway -to Moscow was completed, the station got to be -known as the "Moscow Vauxhall." And so it -spread, until it came about that every railway -station in the Russian Empire, from the Baltic to the -Pacific, derived its name from a long-vanished and -half-forgotten pleasure-garden in South London, -the memory of which is only commemorated to-day -by a bridge and a railway station on its site. The -name "Vauxhall" itself is, I believe, a corruption -of "Folks-Hall," or of its Dutch variant -"Volks-hall." Even in my day the Pavlosk Vauxhall was -a most attractive spot, with an excellent orchestra, -myriads of coloured lamps, and a great semicircle -of restaurants and refreshment booths. When I -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P196"></a>196}</span> -knew it, the Tsarskoe railway still retained its original -rolling-stock of 1837; little queer over-upholstered -carriages, and quaint archaic-looking engines. -It had, I think, been built to a different gauge to -the standard Russian one; anyhow it had no -physical connection with the other railways. It was -subsequently modernised. -</p> - -<p> -Peterhof is far more attractive than Tsarskoe as -it stands on the Gulf of Finland, and the coast, -rising a hundred feet from the sea, redeems the -place from the uniform dead flat of the other -environs of Petrograd. As its name implies, Peterhof -is the creation of Peter himself, who did his best -to eclipse Versailles. His fountains and waterworks -certainly run Versailles very close. The Oriental -in Peter peeped out when he constructed staircases -of gilt copper, and of coloured marbles for the -water to flow over, precisely as Shah Jehan did in -his palaces at Delhi and Agra. As the temperature -both at Delhi and Agra often touches 120° during -the summer months, these decorative cascades would -appear more appropriate there than at Peterhof, -where the summer temperature seldom rises to 70°. -</p> - -<p> -The palace stands on a lofty terrace facing the -sea. A broad straight vista has been cut through the -fir-woods opposite it, down to the waters of the -Gulf. Down the middle of this avenue runs a canal -flanked on either side by twelve fountains. When -<i>les grandes eaux</i> are playing, the effect of this -perspective of fountains and of Peter's gilded -water-chutes is really very fine indeed. I think that the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P197"></a>197}</span> -Oriental in Peter showed itself again here. There -is a long single row of almost precisely similar -fountains in front of the Taj at Agra. -</p> - -<p> -As at Tsarskoe, the public have free access to -every portion of the park, which stretches for four -miles along the sea, with many gardens, countless -fountains, temples and statues. There was in -particular a beautiful Ionic colonnade of pink marble, -from the summit of which cataracts of water spouted -when the fountains played. The effect of this -pink marble temple seen through the film of falling -water was remarkably pretty. What pleased me -were the two small Dutch châteaux in the grounds, -"Marly" and "Monplaisir," where Peter had lived -during the building of his great palace. These two -houses had been built by imported Dutch craftsmen, -and the sight of a severe seventeenth-century -Dutch interior with its tiles and sober oak-panelling -was so unexpected in Russia. It was almost as much -of a surprise as is Groote Constantia, some sixteen -miles south of Cape Town. To drive down a mile-long -avenue of the finest oaks in the world, and to -find at the end of it, amidst hedges of clipped pink -oleander and blue plumbago, a most perfect Dutch -château, exactly as Governor Van der Stell left it -in 1667, is so utterly unexpected at the southern -extremity of the African Continent! Groote -Constantia, the property of the Cape Government, still -contains all its original furniture and pictures of -1667. It is the typical seventeenth-century -Continental château, the main building with its façade -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P198"></a>198}</span> -elaborately decorated in plaster, flanked by two -wings at right angles to it, but the last place in the -world where you would look for such a finished -whole is South Africa. To add to the unexpectedness, -the vines for which Constantia is famous are -grown in fields enclosed with hedges, with huge oaks -as hedgerow timber. This gives such a thoroughly -English look to the landscape that I never could -realise that the sea seen through the trees was the -Indian Ocean, and that the Cape of Good Hope was -only ten miles away. Macao, the ancient Portuguese -colony forty-five miles from Hong-Kong, is -another "surprise-town." It is as though -Aladdin's Slave of the Lamp had dumped a -seventeenth-century Southern European town down in -the middle of China, with churches, plazas, and -fountains complete. -</p> - -<p> -There is really a plethora of palaces round Peterhof. -They grow as thick as quills on a porcupine's -back. One of them, I cannot recall which, had a -really beautiful dining-room, built entirely of pink -marble. In niches in the four angles of the room -were solid silver fountains six feet high, where -Naiads and Tritons spouted water fed by a -running stream. I should have thought this room -more appropriate to India than to Northern Russia, -but one of the fondest illusions Russians cherish -is that they dwell in a semi-tropical climate. -</p> - -<p> -In Petrograd, as soon as the temperature reached -60°, old gentlemen would appear on the Nevsky -dressed in white linen, with Panama hats, and white -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P199"></a>199}</span> -umbrellas, but still wearing the thickest of -overcoats. Should the sun's rays become just -perceptible, iced Kvass and lemonade were at once on -sale in all the streets. On these occasions I made -myself quite popular at the Yacht Club by observing, -as I buttoned up my overcoat tightly before -venturing into the open air, that this tropical heat -was almost unendurable. This invariably provoked -gratified smiles of assent. -</p> - -<p> -Another point as to which Russians were for -some reason touchy was the fact that the water of -the Gulf of Finland is perfectly fresh. Ships can -fill their tanks from the water alongside for ten -miles below Kronstadt, and the catches of the -fishing-boats that came in to Peterhof consisted -entirely of pike, perch, eels, roach, and other -fresh-water fish. Still Russians disliked intensely hearing -their sea alluded to as fresh-water. I tactfully -pretended to ignore the fringe of fresh-water reeds -lining the shore at Peterhof, and after bathing in -the Gulf would enlarge on the bracing effect a -swim in real salt-water had on the human organism. -This, and a few happy suggestions that after the -intense brine of the Gulf the waters of the Dead -Sea would appear insipidly brackish, conduced -towards making me amazingly popular. -</p> - -<p> -In my younger days I was never really happy -without a daily swim during the summer months. -</p> - -<p> -The woods sloping down to the Gulf are delightful -in summer-time, and are absolutely carpeted with -flowers. The flowers seem to realise how short the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P200"></a>200}</span> -span of life allotted to them is, and endeavour to -make the most of it. So do the mosquitoes. -</p> - -<p> -I have very vivid recollections of one especial -visit to Peterhof. In the summer of 1882, the -Ambassador and two other members of the Embassy -were away in England on leave. The Chargé -d'Affaires, who replaced the Ambassador, was laid -up with an epidemic that was working great havoc -then in Petrograd, as was the Second Secretary. -This epidemic was probably due to the extremely -unsatisfactory sanitary condition of the city. -Consequently no one was left to carry on the work of -the Embassy but myself and the new Attaché, -a mere lad. -</p> - -<p> -The relations of Great Britain and France in -the "'eighties" were widely different from those -cordial ones at present prevailing between the two -countries. Far from being trusted friends and -allies, the tension between England and France was -often strained almost to the breaking-point, -especially with regard to Egyptian affairs. This was -due in a great measure to Bismarck's traditional -foreign policy of attempting to embroil her -neighbours, to the greater advantage of Germany. In -old-fashioned surgery, doctors frequently introduced -a foreign body into an open wound in order to -irritate it, and prevent its healing unduly quickly. This -was termed a seton. Bismarck's whole policy was -founded on the introduction of setons into open -wounds, to prevent their healing. His successors -in office endeavoured to continue this policy, but did -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P201"></a>201}</span> -not succeed, for though they might share Bismarck's -entire want of scruples, they lacked his commanding -genius. -</p> - -<p> -Ismail, Khedive of Egypt since 1863, had brought -his country to the verge of bankruptcy by his gross -extravagance. Great Britain and France had -established in 1877 a Dual Control of Egyptian affairs -in the interest of the foreign bondholders, but the -two countries did not pull well together. In 1879 -the incorrigible Ismail was deposed in favour of -Tewfik, and two years later a military revolt was -instigated by Arabi Pasha. Very unwisely, -attempts were made to propitiate Arabi by making him -a member of the Egyptian Cabinet, and matters -went from bad to worse. In May, 1882, the French -and British fleets appeared before Alexandria and -threatened it, and on June 11, 1882, the Arab -population massacred large numbers of the foreign -residents of Alexandria. Still the French Government -refused to take any definite action, and -systematically opposed every proposal made by the -British Government. We were perfectly well aware -that the opposition of the French to the British -policy was consistently backed up by Russia, Russia -being in its turn prompted from Berlin. All this -we knew. After the massacre of June 11, the -French fleet, instead of acting, sailed away from -Alexandria. -</p> - -<p> -Amongst the usual daily sheaf of telegrams from -London which the Attaché and I decyphered on -July 12, 1882, was one announcing that the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P202"></a>202}</span> -British Mediterranean Squadron had on the previous day -bombarded and destroyed the forts of Alexandria, -and that in two days' time British marines would -be landed and the city of Alexandria occupied. There -were also details of further steps that would be -taken, should circumstances render them necessary. -All these facts were to be communicated to the -Russian Government at once. I went off with this -weighty telegram to the house of the Chargé -d'Affaires, whom I found very weak and feverish, and -quite unable to rise from his bed. He directed -me to go forthwith to Peterhof, to see M. de Giers, -the Russian Minister for Foreign Affairs, who was -there in attendance on the Emperor, and to make -my statement to him. I placed the Attaché in -charge of the Chancery, and had time admitted of -it, I should certainly have smeared that youth's -cheeks and lips with some burnt cork, to add a -few years to his apparent age, and to delude -people into the belief that he had already begun to -shave. The dignity of the British Embassy had to -be considered. I begged of him to refrain from -puerile levity in any business interviews he might -have, and I implored him to try to conceal the -schoolboy under the mask of the zealous official. -I then started for Peterhof. It is not often that a -young man of twenty-five is called upon to deliver -what was virtually an Ultimatum to the mighty -Russian Empire, and I had no illusions whatever as -to the manner in which my communication would be -received. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P203"></a>203}</span> -</p> - -<p> -I saw M. de Giers at Peterhof, and read him my -message. I have never in my life seen a man so -astonished; he was absolutely flabbergasted. The -Gladstone Government of 1880-85 was then in -power in England, and it was a fixed axiom with -every Continental statesman (and not, I am bound -to admit, an altogether unfounded one) that under -no circumstances whatever would the Gladstone -Cabinet ever take definite action. They would talk -eternally; they would never act. M. de Giers at -length said to me, "I have heard your communication -with great regret. I have noted what you have -said with even deeper regret." He paused for a -while, and then added very gravely, "The Emperor's -regret will be even more profound than my -own, and I will not conceal from you that his -Majesty will be highly displeased when he learns the -news you have brought me." I inquired of M. de -Giers whether he wished me to see the Emperor, -and to make my communication in person to His -Imperial Majesty, and felt relieved when he told -me that it was unnecessary, as I was not feeling -particularly anxious to face an angry Autocrat -alone. I left a transcript I had myself made of the -telegram I had decyphered with M. de Giers, and -left. A moment's reflection will show that to leave -a copy of decoded telegram with anyone would be -to render the code useless. The original cypher -telegram would be always accessible, and a decypher -of it would be tantamount to giving away the code. -It was our practice to make transcripts, giving the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P204"></a>204}</span> -sense in totally different language, and with the -position of every sentence altered. -</p> - -<p> -After that, as events in Egypt developed, and -until the Chargé d'Affaires was about again, I -journeyed to Peterhof almost daily to see M. de Giers. -We always seemed to get on very well together, in -spite of racial animosities. -</p> - -<p> -The clouds in Egypt rolled away, and with them -the very serious menace to which I have alluded. -Events fortunately shaped themselves propitiously, -On September 13, 1882, Sir Garnet Wolseley -utterly routed Arabi's forces at Tel-el-Kebir; Arabi -was deported to Ceylon, and the revolt came to an -end. -</p> - -<p> -A diplomat naturally meets Ministers of Foreign -Affairs of many types. There was a strong -contrast between the polished and courtly M. de Giers, -who in spite of his urbanity could manage to infuse -a very strong sub-acid flavour into his suavity when -he chose, and some other Ministers with whom I -have come in contact. A few years later, when -at Buenos Ayres, preliminary steps were taken for -drawing up an Extradition Treaty between Great -Britain and Paraguay, and as there were details -which required adjusting, I was sent 1,100 miles -up the river to Asuncion, the unsophisticated -capital of the Inland Republic. Dr. ——, at that time -Paraguayan Foreign Minister, was a Guarani, of -pure Indian blood. He did not receive me at the -Ministry for Foreign Affairs, for the excellent -reason that there was no such place in that primitive -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P205"></a>205}</span> -republic, but in his own extremely modest -residence. When his Excellency welcomed me in the -whitewashed sala of that house, sumptuously -furnished with four wooden chairs, and nothing else -whatever, he had on neither shoes, stockings, nor -shirt, and wore merely a pair of canvas trousers, -and an unbuttoned coat of the same material, -affording ample glimpses of his somewhat dusky skin. -In the suffocating heat of Asuncion such a -costume has its obvious advantages; still I cannot -imagine, let us say, the French Minister for Foreign -Affairs receiving the humblest member of a -Foreign Legation at the Quai d'Orsay with bare feet, -shirtless, and clad only in two garments. -</p> - -<p> -Dr. ——, in spite of being Indian by blood, spoke -most correct and finished Spanish, and had all the -courtesy which those who use that beautiful -language seem somehow to acquire instinctively. It is -to be regretted that the same cannot be said of all -those using the English language. Not to be -outdone by this polite Paraguayan, I responded in the -same vein, and we mutually smothered each other -with the choicest flowers of Castilian courtesy. These -little amenities, though doubtless tending to smooth -down the asperities of life, are apt to consume a -good deal of time. -</p> - -<p> -Once at Kyoto in Japan, I had occasion for the -services of a dentist. As the dentist only spoke -Japanese, I took my interpreter with me. After -removing my shoes at the door—an unusual preliminary -to a visit to a dentist—we went upstairs, where -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P206"></a>206}</span> -we found a dapper little individual in kimono and -white socks, surrounded by the most modern and -up-to-date dental paraphernalia, sucking his breath, -and rubbing his knees with true Japanese politeness. -Eager to show that a foreigner could also -have delightful manners, I sucked my breath, if -anything, rather louder, and rubbed my knees a -trifle harder. "Dentist says," came from the -interpreter, "will you honourably deign to explain -where trouble lies in honourable tooth?" -</p> - -<p> -"If the dentist will honourably deign to examine -my left-hand lower molar," I responded with charming -courtesy, "he will find it requires stopping, but -for Heaven's sake, Mr. Nakimura, ask him to be -careful how he uses his honourable drill, for I am -terrified to death at that invention of the Evil -One." Soon the Satanic drill got well into its stride, and -began boring into every nerve of my head. I jumped -out of the chair. "Tell the dentist, Mr. Nakimura, -that he is honourably deigning to hurt me like the -very devil with his honourable but wholly damnable -drill." "Dentist says if you honourably deign -to reseat yourself in chair, he soon conquer difficulties -in your honourable tooth." "Certainly. But -dentist must not give me honourable hell any more," -and so on, and so on. I am bound to admit that the -little Jap's workmanship was so good that it has -remained intact up to the present days. I wonder -if Japs, when annoyed, can ever relieve themselves -by the use of really strong language, or whether -the crust of conventional politeness is too thick to -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P207"></a>207}</span> -admit of it. In that case they must feel like a -lobster afflicted with acute eczema, unable to obtain -relief by scratching himself, owing to the impervious -shell in which Nature has encased him. -</p> - -<p> -I dined with the British Consul at Asuncion, after -my interview with Dr. ——. The Consul lived -three miles out of town, and the coffee we drank -after dinner, the sugar we put into the coffee, and -the cigars we smoked with it, had all been grown in -his garden, within sight of the windows. I had -ridden out to the Quinta in company with a young -Australian, who will reappear later on in these -pages in his proper place; one Dick Howard. It -was the first but by no means the last time in my -life that I ever got on a horse in evening clothes. -Dick Howard, having no evening clothes with him, -had arrayed himself in one of his favourite cricket -blazers, a pleasantly vivid garment. On our way -out, my horse shied violently at a snake in the road. -The girths slipped on the grass-fed animal, and -my saddle rolled gently round and deposited me, -tail-coat, white tie and all, in some four feet of dust. -The snake, however, probably panic-stricken at the -sight of Howard's blazer, had tactfully withdrawn; -otherwise, as it happened to be a deadly Jararaca, it -is highly unlikely that I should have been writing -these lines at the present moment. The ineradicable -love of Dick Howard, the cheery, laughing young -Antipodean, for brilliant-hued blazers of various -athletic clubs will be enlarged on later. In Indian hill -stations all men habitually ride out to dinner-parties, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P208"></a>208}</span> -whilst ladies are carried in litters. During the -rains, men put a suit of pyjamas over their -evening clothes to protect them, before drawing on -rubber boots and rubber coats and venturing into -the pelting downpour. The Syce trots behind, -carrying his master's pumps in a rubber sponge-bag. -</p> - -<p> -All this, however, is far afield from Russia. -Alexander III preferred Gatchina to any of his other -palaces as a residence, as it was so much smaller, -Gatchina being a cosy little house of 600 rooms only. -I never saw it except once in mid-winter, when -the Emperor summoned the Ambassador there, -and I was also invited. As the far-famed beauties -of Gatchina Park were covered with four feet of -snow, it would be difficult to pronounce an opinion -upon them. The rivers and lakes, the haunts of the -celebrated Gatchina trout, were, of course, also -deep-buried. -</p> - -<p> -Alexander III was a man of very simple tastes, -and nothing could be plainer than the large study -in which he received us. Alexander III, a Colossus -of a man, had great dignity, combined with a -geniality of manner very different from the glacial -hauteur of his father, Alexander II. The Emperor -was in fact rather partial to a humorous anecdote, -and some I recalled seemed to divert his Majesty. -Outside his study-door stood two gigantic negroes on -guard, in Eastern dresses of green and scarlet. -The Empress Marie, though she did not share her -sister Queen Alexandra's wonderful beauty, had all -of her subtle and indescribable charm of manner, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P209"></a>209}</span> -and she was very gracious to a stupid young -Secretary-of-Embassy. -</p> - -<p> -The bedroom given to me at Gatchina could -hardly be described by the standardised epithets -for Russian interiors "bare, gaunt, and whitewashed," -as it had light blue silk walls embroidered -with large silver wreaths. The mirrors were silvered, -and the bed stood in a species of chancel, up four -steps, and surrounded by a balustrade of silvered -carved wood. Both the Ambassador and I agreed -that the Imperial cellar fully maintained its high -reputation. We were given in particular some very -wonderful old Tokay, a present from the Emperor -of Austria, a wine that was not on the market. -</p> - -<p> -We were taken all over the palace, which contained, -amongst other things, a large riding-school -and a full-sized theatre. The really enchanting -room was a large hall on the ground floor where -many generations of little Grand-Dukes and -Grand-Duchesses had played. As, owing to the severe -winter climate, it is difficult for Russian children -to amuse themselves much out-of-doors, these large -play-rooms are almost a necessity in that frozen -land. The Gatchina play-room was a vast low -hall, a place of many whitewashed arches. In this -delightful room was every possible thing that could -attract a child. At one end were two wooden -Montagnes Busses, the descent of which could be -negotiated in little wheeled trollies. In another -corner was a fully-equipped gymnasium. There were -"giants' strides," swings, swing-boats and a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P210"></a>210}</span> -merry-go-round. There was a toy railway with switches -and signal-posts complete, the locomotives of which -were worked by treadles, like a tricycle. There -were dolls' houses galore, and larger houses into -which the children could get, with real cooking-stoves -in the little kitchens, and little parlours in -which to eat the results of their primitive culinary -experiments. There were mechanical orchestras, -self-playing pianos and barrel-organs, and masses -and masses of toys. On seeing this delectable spot, -I regretted for the first time that I had not been -born a Russian Grand-Duke, between the ages -though of five and twelve only. -</p> - -<p> -I believe that there is a similar room at Tsarskoe -although I never saw it. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap07"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P211"></a>211}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER VII -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Lisbon—The two Kings of Portugal, and of Barataria—King -Fernando and the Countess—A Lisbon bull-fight—The -"hat-trick"—Courtship window-parade—The spurred -youth of Lisbon—Portuguese politeness—The De Reszke -family—The Opera—Terrible personal experiences in a -circus—The bounding Bishop—Ecclesiastical -possibilities—Portuguese coinage—Beauty of Lisbon—Visits of the -British Fleet—Misguided midshipmen—The Legation -Whaleboat—"Good wine needs no bush"—A delightful -orange-farm—Cintra—Contrast between the Past and Present of -Portugal. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -A professional diplomat becomes used to rapid -changes in his environment. He has also to learn -to readjust his monetary standards, for after -calculating everything in roubles for, let us say, four -years, he may find himself in a country where the -peseta or the dollar are the units. At every fresh -post he has to start again from the beginning, as -he endeavours to learn the customs and above all -the mentality of the new country. He has to form -a brand-new acquaintance, to get to know the points -of view of those amongst whom he is living, and -in general to shape himself to totally new -surroundings. A diplomat in this way insensibly -acquires adaptability. -</p> - -<p> -It would be difficult to imagine a greater contrast -to Petrograd than Lisbon, which was my next post. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P212"></a>212}</span> -After the rather hectic gaiety of Petrograd, with -its persistent flavour of an exotic and artificial -civilisation, the placid, uneventful flow of life at -Lisbon was restful, possibly even dull. -</p> - -<p> -Curiously enough, in those days there were two -Kings of Portugal at the same time. This state of -things (which always reminded me irresistibly of -the two Kings of Barataria in Gilbert and Sullivan's -"Gondoliers") had come about quite naturally. -Queen Maria II (Maria da Gloria) had married -in 1836 Prince Ferdinand of Saxe-Coburg, who -was raised next year to the title of King Consort. -Maria II died in 1853 and was succeeded by Pedro -V. During his son's minority King Ferdinand acted -as Regent, and Pedro, dying unmarried eight years -after, was succeeded in turn by his brother Luiz, -also a son of King Ferdinand. -</p> - -<p> -When the Corps Diplomatique were received at -the Ajuda Palace on New Year's Day, the scene -always struck me as being intensely comical. The -two Kings (universally known as Dom Fernando -and Dom Luiz) entered simultaneously by different -doors. When they met Dom Luiz made a low bow -to Dom Fernando, and then kissed his father's -hand. Dom Fernando responded with an equally -low bow, and kissed his son's hand. The two Kings -then ascended the throne together. Had "The -Gondoliers" been already composed then, I should -have expected the two Monarchs to break into the -duet from the second act, "Rising early in the -Morning," in which the two Kings of Barataria -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P213"></a>213}</span> -explain their multitudinous duties. As King Luiz -had a fine tenor voice, His Majesty could also in -that case have brightened up the proceedings by -singing us "Take a pair of sparkling eyes." -</p> - -<p> -Dom Fernando was a perfectly delightful old -gentleman, very highly cultured, full of humour, and -with a charming natural courtesy of manner. The -drolly-named Necessidades Palace which he inhabited -was an unpretentious house full of beautiful old -Portuguese furniture. Most of the rooms were -wainscoted with the finest "azulejos" I ever saw; -blue and white tiles which the Portuguese adopted -originally from the Moors, but learnt later to make -for themselves under the tuition of Dutch craftsmen -from Delft. These "azulejos" form the most -decorative background to a room that can be imagined. -A bold pictorial design, a complete and elaborate -picture in blue on white, runs along their whole -length. It is thus very difficult to remove and -re-erect "azulejos," for one broken tile will spoil the -whole design. The Portuguese use these everywhere, -both for the exteriors and interiors of their -houses, and also as garden ornaments, and they are -wonderfully effective. -</p> - -<p> -Dom Fernando had married morganatically, as -his second wife, a dancer of American origin. This -lady had a remarkably strident voice, and was much -to the fore on the fortnightly afternoons when -Dom Fernando received the men of the Corps -Diplomatique. For some reason or other, the ladies -of the Diplomatic Body always found themselves -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P214"></a>214}</span> -unable to attend these gatherings. The courteous, -genial old King would move about, smilingly -dispensing his truly admirable cigars, and brimful of -anecdotes and jokelets. The nasal raucaus tones -of the ex-dancer, always known as "the Countess," -would summon him in English. "Say, King! you -just hurry up with those cigars. They are badly -wanted here." -</p> - -<p> -I imagine that in the days of her successes on the -stage the lady's outline must have been less -voluminous than it was when I made her acquaintance. -The only other occasion when I heard a monarch -addressed as "King" <i>tout court</i> was when a small -relation of my own, aged five, at a children's -garden-party at Buckingham Palace insisted on answering -King Edward VII's questions with a "Yes, O -King," or "No, O King"; a form of address which -had a pleasant Biblical flavour about it. -</p> - -<p> -The Portuguese are a very humane race, and are -extraordinarily kind to animals. They are also -devoted to bull-fights. These two tendencies seem -irreconcilable, till the fact is grasped that a -Portuguese bull-fight is absolutely bloodless. Neither -bulls nor horses are killed; the whole spectacle -resolves itself into an exhibition of horsemanship and -skill. -</p> - -<p> -The bulls' horns are padded and covered with -leather thongs. The <i>picador</i> rides a really good -and highly-trained horse. Should he allow the bull -even to touch his horse with his padded horns, the -unfortunate <i>picador</i> will get mercilessly hissed. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P215"></a>215}</span> -These <i>picadores</i> do not wear the showy Spanish -dresses, but Louis Quinze costumes of purple -velvet with large white wigs. The <i>espada</i> is armed -with a wooden sword only, which he plants innocuously -on the neck of the bull, and woe betide him -should those tens of thousands of eager eyes watching -him detect a deviation of even one inch from the -death-dealing spot. He will be hissed out of the -ring. On the other hand, should he succeed in -touching the fatal place with his harmless weapon, his -skill would be rewarded with thunders of applause, -and all the occupants of the upper galleries would -shower small change and cigarettes into the ring, -and would also hurl their hats into the arena, which -always struck me as a peculiarly comical way of -expressing their appreciation. -</p> - -<p> -The <i>espada</i> would gaze at the hundreds of -shabby battered bowler hats reposing on the sand -of the arena with the same expression of simulated -rapture that a <i>prima donna</i> assumes as floral -tributes are handed to her across the footlights. The -<i>espada</i>, his hand on his heart, would bow again -and again, as though saying, "Are these lovely hats -really for me?" But after a second glance at the -dilapidated head-gear, covering the entire floor-space -of the arena with little sub-fuse hummocks, he -would apparently change his mind. "It is really -amazingly good of you, and I do appreciate it, -but I think on the whole that I will not deprive -you of them," and then an exhibition of real skill -occurred. The <i>espada</i>, taking up a hat, would -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P216"></a>216}</span> -glance at the galleries. Up went a hand, and the -hat hurtled aloft to its owner with unfailing -accuracy; and this performance was repeated perhaps a -hundred times. I always considered the <i>espada's</i> -hat-returning act far more extraordinary than his -futile manipulation of the inoffensive wooden sword. -During the aerial flights of the hats, two small -acolytes of the <i>espada</i>, his miniature facsimiles in -dress, picked up the small change and cigarettes, -and, I trust, duly handed them over intact to their -master. The bull meanwhile, after his imaginary -slaughter, had trotted home contentedly to his -underground quarters, surrounded by some twenty -gaily-caparisoned tame bullocks. To my mind Spanish -bull-fighting is revolting and horrible to the last -degree. I have seen it once, and nothing will -induce me to assist a second time at so disgusting a -spectacle; but the most squeamish person can view -a Portuguese bull-fight with impunity. Even though -the bull has his horns bandaged, considerable skill -and great acrobatic agility come into play. Few -of us would care to stand in the path of a charging -polled Angus bull, hornless though he be. The -<i>bandarilheros</i> who plant paper-decorated darts in -the neck of the charging bull are as nimble as trained -acrobats, and vault lightly out of the ring when -hard pressed. Conspicuous at a Lisbon bull-fight -are a number of sturdy peasants, tricked out in -showy clothes of scarlet and orange. These are -"the men of strength." Should a bull prove -cowardly in the ring, and decline to fight, the public -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P217"></a>217}</span> -clamour for him to be caught and expelled ignomiously -from the ring by "the men of strength." Eight -of the stalwart peasants will then hurl themselves -on to the bull and literally hustle him out -of the arena; no mean feat. Take it all round, a -Portuguese bull-fight was picturesque and full of -life and colour, though the neighbouring Spaniards -affected an immense contempt for them on account -of their bloodlessness and make-belief. -</p> - -<p> -A curious Portuguese custom is one which -ordains that a youth before proposing formally for -a maiden's hand must do "window parade" for two -months (in Portuguese "fazer a janella"). -Nature has not allotted good looks to the majority -of the Portuguese race, and she has been especially -niggardly in this respect to the feminine element -of the population. The taste for olives and for -caviar is usually supposed to be an acquired one, and -so may be the taste for Lusitanian loveliness. -Somewhat to the surprise of the foreigner, Portuguese -maidens seemed to inspire the same sentiments in the -breasts of the youthful male as do their more-favoured -sisters in other lands, but in <i>bourgeois</i> circles -the "window-parade" was an indispensable -preliminary to courtship. The youth had to pass -backwards and forwards along the street where -the dwelling of his <i>innamorata</i> was situated, -casting up glances of passionate appeal to a window, -where, as he knew, the form of his enchantress -would presently appear. The maiden, when she -judged that she might at length reveal herself -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P218"></a>218}</span> -without unduly encouraging her suitor, moved to the -open window and stood fanning herself, laboriously -unconscious of her ardent swain in the street -below. The youth would then express his consuming -passion in pantomime, making frantic gestures in -testimony of his mad adoration. The senhorita -in return might favour him with a coy glance, -and in token of dismissal would perhaps drop him -a rose, which the young man would press to his -lips and then place over his heart, and so the -performance came to an end, to be renewed again the -next evening. The lovesick swain would almost -certainly be wearing spurs. At first I could not make -out why the young men of Lisbon, who had -probably never been on a horse in their whole lives, -should habitually walk about the town with spurs -on their heels. It was, I think, a survival of the -old Peninsular tradition, and was intended to prove -to the world that they were "cavalleiros." In -Spain an immense distinction was formerly made -between the "caballero" and the "peon"; the -mounted man, or gentleman, and the man on foot, -or day-labourer. The little box-spurs were the only -means these Lisbon youths had of proving their -quality to the world. They had no horses, but they -<i>had</i> spurs, which was obviously the next best thing. -</p> - -<p> -Fortunes in Portugal being small, and strict -economy having to be observed amongst all classes, -I have heard that these damsels of the window-sill -only dressed down to the waist. They would -assume a <i>corsage</i> of scarlet or crimson plush, and, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P219"></a>219}</span> -their nether garments being invisible from below, -would study both economy and comfort by wearing -a flannel petticoat below it. It is unnecessary for -me to add that I never verified this detail from -personal observation. -</p> - -<p> -Some of the old Portuguese families occupied -very fine, if sparsely furnished, houses, with -<i>enfilades</i> of great, lofty bare rooms. After calling -at one of these houses, the master of it would in -Continental fashion "reconduct" his visitor towards -the front door. At every single doorway the -Portuguese code of politeness dictated that the -visitor should protest energetically against his host -accompanying him one step further. With equal -insistence the host expressed his resolve to escort his -visitor a little longer. The master of the house -had previously settled in his own mind exactly how -far he was going towards the entrance, the distance -depending on the rank of the visitor, but the accepted -code of manners insisted upon these protests and -counter-protests at every single doorway. -</p> - -<p> -In Germany "door-politeness" plays a great -part. In one of Kotzebue's comedies two provincial -notabilities of equal rank are engaged in a duel of -"door-politeness." "But I must really insist on your -Excellency passing first." "I could not dream -of it, your Excellency. I will follow you." "Your -Excellency knows that I could never allow that," -and so on. The curtain falls on these two ladies -each declining to precede the other, and when it -rises on the second act the doorway is still there, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P220"></a>220}</span> -and the two ladies are still disputing. Quite an -effective stage-situation, and one which a modern -dramatist might utilise. -</p> - -<p> -In paying visits in Lisbon one was often pressed -to remain to dinner, but the invitation was a mere -form of politeness, and was not intended to be -accepted. You invariably replied that you deeply -regretted that you were already engaged. The more -you were urged to throw over your engagement, the -deeper became your regret that this particular -engagement must be fulfilled. The engagement -probably consisted in dining alone at the club, but under -no circumstances must the invitation be accepted. -In view of the straitened circumstances of most -Portuguese families, the evening meal would -probably consist of one single dish of <i>bacalhao</i> or salt -cod, and you would have put your hosts to the -greatest inconvenience. -</p> - -<p> -With the exception of the Opera, the Lisbon -theatres were most indifferent. When I first -arrived there the Lisbon Opera had been fortunate -enough to secure the services of a very gifted Polish -family, a sister and two brothers, the latter of whom -were destined later to become the idols of the -London public. They were Mlle. de Reszke and Jean -and Edouard de Reszke, all three of them then -comparatively unknown. Mlle. de Reszke had the -most glorious voice. To hear her singing with her -brother Jean in "Faust" was a perfect revelation. -Mlle. de Reszke appeared to the best advantage -when the stalwart Jean sang with her, for she was -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P221"></a>221}</span> -immensely tall, and towered over the average -portly, stumpy, little operatic tenor. The French say, -cruelly enough, "bête comme un ténor." This -may or may not be true, but the fact remains that -the usual stage tenor is short, bull-necked, and -conspicuously inclined to adipose tissue. When her -brother Jean was out of the cast, it required an -immense effort of the imagination to picture this -splendid creature as being really desperately -enamoured of the little paunchy, swarthy individual -who, reaching to her shoulder only, was hurling his -high notes at the public over the footlights. -</p> - -<p> -At afternoon parties these three consummate artists -occasionally sang unaccompanied trios. I have -never heard anything so perfectly done. I am -convinced that had Mlle. de Reszke lived, she would -have established as great a European reputation as -did her two brothers. The Lisbon musical public -were terribly critical. They had one most disconcerting -habit. Instead of hissing, should an artist -have been unfortunate enough to incur their -displeasure, the audience stood up and began banging -the movable wooden seats of the stalls and dress -circle up and down. This produced a deafening -din, effectually drowning the orchestra and singers. -The effect on the unhappy artist against whom -all this pandemonium was directed may be imagined. -On gala nights the Lisbon Opera was decorated -in a very simple but effective manner. Most -Portuguese families own a number of "colchas," or -embroidered bed-quilts. These are of satin, silk, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P222"></a>222}</span> -or linen, beautifully worked in colours. On a gala -night, hundreds of these "colchas" were hung over -the fronts of the boxes and galleries, with a -wonderfully decorative effect. In the same way, on -Church festivals, when religious processions made -their way through the streets, many-lined "colchas" -were thrown over the balconies of the houses, giving -an extraordinarily festive appearance to the town. -</p> - -<p> -As at Berlin and Petrograd, there was a really -good circus at Lisbon. I, for one, am sorry that -this particular form of entertainment is now -obsolete in England, for it has always appealed to me, -in spite of some painful memories connected with -a circus which, if I may be permitted a long -digression, I will relate. -</p> - -<p> -Nearly thirty years ago I left London on a visit -to one of the historic châteaux of France, in -company with a friend who is now a well-known -member of Parliament, and also churchwarden of a -famous West-end church. We travelled over by night, -and reached our destination about eleven next -morning. We noticed a huge circular tent in the park -of the château, but paid no particular attention to -it. The first words with which our hostess, the -bearer of a great French name, greeted us were, "I -feel sure that I can rely upon you, <i>mes amis</i>. You -have to help us out of a difficulty. My son and his -friends have been practising for four months for -their amateur circus. Our first performance is -to-day at two o'clock. We have sold eight hundred -tickets for the benefit of the French Red Cross, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P223"></a>223}</span> -and yesterday, only yesterday, our two clowns -were telegraphed for. They have both been ordered -to the autumn manoeuvres, and you two must take -their places, or our performance is ruined. <i>Je sais -que vous n'allez pas me manquer</i>." In vain we -both protested that we had had no experience -whatever as clowns, that branch of our education having -been culpably neglected. Our hostess insisted, and -would take no denial. "Go and wash; go and eat; -and then put on the dresses you will find in your -rooms." I never felt so miserable in my life as I -did whilst making up my face the orthodox dead -white, with scarlet triangles on the cheeks, big -mouth, and blackened nose. The clown's kit was -complete in every detail, with wig, conical hat, -patterned stockings and queer white felt shoes. As far -as externals went, I was orthodoxy itself, but the -"business," and the "wheezes"! The future -church-warden had been taken in hand by some young -Frenchmen. As he was to play "Chocolat," the -black clown, they commenced by stripping him and -blacking him from head to foot with boot-blacking. -They then polished him. -</p> - -<p> -I entered the ring with a sinking heart. I was -to remain there two hours, and endeavour to amuse -a French audience for that period without any -preparation whatever. "Business," "gag," and -"patter" had all to be improvised, and the "patter," -of course, had to be in French. Luckily, I could -then throw "cart-wheels" and turn somersaults to -an indefinite extent. So I made my entrance in -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P224"></a>224}</span> -that fashion. Fortunately I got on good terms with -my audience almost at once, and with confidence -came inspiration; and with inspiration additional -confidence, and a judicious recollection of the -stock-tricks of clowns in various Continental capitals. -Far greater liberties can be taken with a French -audience than would be possible in England, but -if anyone thinks it an easy task to go into a circus -ring and to clown for two hours on end in a -foreign language, without one minute's preparation, let -him try it. The ring-master always pretends to -flick the clown; it is part of the traditional -"business"; but this amateur ring-master (most -beautifully got up) handled his long whip so unskilfully -that he not only really flicked my legs, but cut -pieces out of them. When I jumped and yelled -with genuine pain, the audience roared with -laughter, so of course the ring-master plied his whip -again. At the end of the performance my legs -were absolutely raw. The clown came off badly -too in some of the "roughs-and-tumbles," for the -clown is always fair game. The French amateurs -gave a really astonishingly good performance. They -had borrowed trained horses from a real circus, -and the same young Hungarian to whom I have -alluded at the beginning of these reminiscences as -having created a mild sensation by appearing at -Buckingham Palace in a tiger-skin tunic trimmed -with large turquoises, rode round the ring on a pad -in sky-blue tights, bounding through paper hoops -and over garlands of artificial flowers as easily and -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P225"></a>225}</span> -gracefully as though he had done nothing else all -his life. Later on in the afternoon this versatile -Hungarian reappeared in flowing Oriental robes -and a false beard as "Ali Ben Hassan, the Bedouin -Chief." Riding round the ring at full gallop, and -firing from the saddle with a shot-gun, he broke glass -balls with all the dexterity of a trained professional. -That young Hungarian is now a bishop of the -Roman Catholic Church. Before 1914 I had occasion -to meet him frequently. Whenever I thought that -on the strength of his purple robes he was assuming -undue airs of ecclesiastical superiority (to use -the word "swanking" would be an unpardonable -vulgarism, especially in the case of a bishop), I -invariably reminded his lordship of the afternoon, -many years ago, when, arrayed in sky-blue silk -tights, he had dashed through paper hoops in a -French amateur circus. My remarks were usually -met with the deprecatory smile and little gesture -of protest of the hand so characteristic of the -Roman ecclesiastic, as the bishop murmured, "<i>Cher -ami, tout cela est oublié depuis longtemps,</i>" I -assured the prelate that for my own part I should -never forget it, if only for the unexpected skill -he had displayed; though I recognise that bishops -may dislike being reminded of their past, especially -when they have performed in circuses in their youth. -</p> - -<p> -In addition to the Hungarian's "act," there was -another beautiful exhibition of horsemanship. A -boy of sixteen, a member of an historic French -family, by dint of long, patient, and painful -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P226"></a>226}</span> -practice, was able to give an admirable performance of -the familiar circus "turn" known as "The Courier -of St. Petersburg," in which the rider, standing -a-straddle on two barebacked ponies, drives four -other ponies in front of him; an extraordinary feat -for an amateur to have mastered. My friend the -agile ecclesiastic is portrayed, perhaps a little -maliciously, in Abel Hermant's most amusing book -"Trains de Luxe," under the name of "Monseigneur -Granita de Caffe Nero." It may interest -ladies to learn that this fastidious prelate always -had his purple robes made by Doucet, the famous -Paris dressmaking firm, to ensure that they should -"sit" properly. On the whole, our circus was -really a very creditable effort for amateurs. -</p> - -<p> -The entertainment was, I believe, pronounced -a tremendous success, and at its conclusion the only -person who was the worse for it was the poor -clown. He had not only lost his voice entirely, -from shouting for two hours on end, but he was -black and blue from head to foot. Added to which, -his legs were raw and bleeding from the ring-master's -pitiless whip. I am thankful to say that in the -course of a long life that was my one and only -appearance in the ring of a circus. My fellow-clown, -"Chocolat," the future member of Parliament -and churchwarden, had been so liberally coated -with boot-blacking by his French friends that -it refused to come off, and for days afterwards his -face was artistically decorated with swarthy patches. -</p> - -<p> -Before 1914, I had frequently pointed out to my -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P227"></a>227}</span> -friend the bishop that should he wish to raise any -funds in his Hungarian diocese he could not do -better than repeat his performance in the French -circus. As a concession to his exalted rank, he -might wear tights of episcopal purple. Should he -have retained any of the nimbleness of his youth, his -flock could not fail to be enormously gratified at -witnessing their chief pastor bounding through -paper hoops and leaping over obstacles with -incredible agility for his age. The knowledge that -they had so gifted and supple a prelate would -probably greatly increase his moral influence over them -and could scarcely fail to render him amazingly -popular. Could his lordship have convinced his -flock that he could demolish the arguments of any -religious opponent with the same ease that he -displayed in penetrating the paper obstacles to his -equestrian progress, he would certainly be acclaimed -as a theological controversialist of the first rank. -In the same way, I have endeavoured to persuade -my friend the member of Parliament that he might -brighten up the proceedings in the House of -Commons were he to appear there occasionally in the -clown's dress he wore thirty years ago in France. -Failing that, his attendance at the Easter Vestry -Meeting of his West-end church with a blackened -face might introduce that note of hilarity which is -often so markedly lacking at these gatherings. -</p> - -<p> -All this has led me far away from Lisbon in the -"'eighties." Mark Twain has described, in "A -Tramp Abroad," the terror with which a foreigner -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P228"></a>228}</span> -is overwhelmed on being presented with his first -hotel bill on Portuguese territory. The total will -certainly run into thousands of reis, and the -unhappy stranger sees bankruptcy staring him in the -face. -</p> - -<p> -As a matter of fact, one thousand reis equal at -par exactly four and twopence. It follows that -a hundred reis are the equivalent of fivepence, and -that one rei is the twentieth of a penny. -</p> - -<p> -A French colleague of mine insisted that the -Portuguese were actuated by national pride in -selecting so small a monetary unit. An elementary -calculation will show that the proud possessor of -£222 10<i>s.</i> can claim to be a millionaire in Portugal. -According to my French friend, Portugal was -anxious to show the world that though a small country, -a larger proportion of her subjects were millionaires -than any other European country could boast -of. In the same way the Frenchman explained the -curious Lisbon habit of writing a number over -every opening on the ground floor of a house, -whether door or window. As a result the numbers -of the houses crept up rapidly to the most imposing -figures. It was not uncommon to find a house -inscribed No. 2000 in a comparatively short street. -Accordingly, Lisbon, though a small capital, was -able to gain a spurious reputation for immense size. -</p> - -<p> -A peculiarity of Lisbon was the double set of -names of the principal streets and squares: the -official name, and the popular one. I have never -known this custom prevail anywhere else. Thus the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P229"></a>229}</span> -principal street was officially known as Rua -Garrett, and that name was duly written up. -Everyone, though, spoke of it as the "Chiada." In the -same way the splendid square facing the Tagus -which English people call "Black Horse Square" -had its official designation written up as "Praça do -Comercio." It was, however, invariably called -"Terreiro do Paço." The list could be extended -indefinitely. Street names in Lisbon did not err in the -matter of shortness. "Rua do Sacramento a Lapa -de Baixio" strikes me as quite a sufficiently lengthy -name for a street of six houses. -</p> - -<p> -Lisbon is certainly a handsome town. It has -been so frequently wrecked by earthquakes that -there is very little mediæval architecture remaining, -in spite of its great age. Two notable exceptions -are the Tower of Belem and the exquisitely beautiful -cloisters of the Hieronymite Convent, also at Belem. -The tower stands on a promontory jutting into the -Tagus, and the convent was built in the late -fifteen-hundreds to commemorate the discovery of the sea -route to India by Vasco da Gama. These two -buildings are both in the "Manoeline" style, a -variety of highly ornate late Gothic peculiar to -Portugal. It is the fashion to sneer at Manoeline -architecture, with its profuse decoration, as being a -decadent style. To my mind the cloisters of Belem -(the Portuguese variant of Bethlehem) rank as one -of the architectural masterpieces of Europe. Its -arches are draped, as it were, with a lace-work of -intricate and minute stone carving, as delicate -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P230"></a>230}</span> -almost as jewellers' work. The warm brown colour -of the stone adds to the effect, and anyone but an -architectural pedant must admit the amazing beauty -of the place. The finest example of Manoeline in -Portugal is the great Abbey of Batalha, in my day -far away from any railway, and very difficult of -access. -</p> - -<p> -At the time of the great earthquake of 1755 which -laid Lisbon in ruins, Portugal was fortunate enough -to have a man of real genius at the head of -affairs, the Marquis de Pombal. Pombal not only -re-established the national finances on a sound basis, -but rebuilt the capital from his own designs. The -stately "Black Horse Square" fronting the Tagus -and the streets surrounding it were all designed -by Pombal. I suppose that there is no hillier -capital in the world than Lisbon. Many of the streets -are too steep for the tramcars to climb. The -Portuguese fashion of coating the exteriors of the houses -with bright-coloured tiles of blue and white, or -orange and white, gives a cheerful air to the -town,—the French word "riant" would be more -appropriate—and the numerous public gardens, where -the palm-trees apparently grow as contentedly as -in their native tropics, add to this effect of sunlit -brightness. As in Brazil and other Portuguese-speaking -countries, the houses are all very tall, and -sash-windows are universal, as in England, -contrary to the custom of other Continental countries. -</p> - -<p> -House rent could not be called excessive in Portugal. -In my day quite a large house, totally lacking -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P231"></a>231}</span> -in every description of modern convenience, but -with a fine staircase and plenty of lofty rooms, -could be hired for £30 a year, a price which may -make the Londoner think seriously of transferring -himself to the banks of the Tagus. -</p> - -<p> -In the "'eighties" Lisbon was the winter -headquarters of our Channel Squadron. I once saw -the late Admiral Dowdeswell bring his entire fleet -up the Tagus under sail; a most wonderful sight! -The two five-masted flagships, the <i>Minotaur</i> and -the <i>Agincourt</i>, had very graceful lines, and with -every stitch of their canvas set, they were things of -exquisite beauty. The <i>Northumberland</i> had also -been designed as a sister ship, but for some reason -had had two of her masts removed. The old -<i>Minotaur,</i> now alas! a shapeless hulk known as <i>Ganges -II</i>, is still, I believe, doing useful work at Harwich. -</p> - -<p> -As may be imagined, the arrival of the British -Fleet infused a certain element of liveliness into -the sleepy city. Gambling-rooms were opened all -over Lisbon, and as the bluejackets had a habit of -wrecking any place where they suspected the -proprietor of cheating them, the Legation had its -work cut out for it in endeavouring to placate the -local authorities and smooth down their wounded -susceptibilities. One gambling-house, known as -"Portuguese Joe's," was frequented mainly by -midshipmen. They were strictly forbidden to go -there, but the place was crammed every night with -them, in spite of official prohibition. The British -midshipman being a creature of impulse, the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P232"></a>232}</span> -moment these youths (every one of whom thought it -incumbent on his dignity to have a huge cigar in -his mouth, even though he might still be of very -tender years) suspected any foul play, they would -proceed very systematically and methodically to -smash the whole place up to matchwood. There -was consequently a good deal of trouble, and the -Legation quietly put strong pressure on the -Portuguese Government to close these gambling-houses -down permanently. This was accordingly done, -much to the wrath of the midshipmen, who were, -I believe, supplied with free drinks and cigars by -the proprietors of these places. It is just possible -that the Admiral's wishes may have been consulted -before this drastic action was taken. Midshipmen -in those days went to sea at fourteen and fifteen -years of age, and consequently needed some -shepherding. -</p> - -<p> -As our Minister had constantly to pay official -visits to the Fleet, the British Government kept -a whale-boat at Lisbon for the use of the Legation. -The coxswain, an ex-naval petty officer who spoke -Portuguese, acted as Chancery servant when not -afloat. When the boat was wanted, the coxswain -went down to the quay with two bagfuls of -bluejackets' uniforms, and engaged a dozen chance -Tagus boatmen. The Lisbon boatman, though -skilful, is extraordinarily unclean in his person and -his attire. I wish the people who lavished praises -on the smart appearance of the Legation whaleboat -and of its scratch crew could have seen, as I -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P233"></a>233}</span> -often did, the revoltingly filthy garments of these -longshoremen before they drew the snowy naval -white duck trousers and jumpers over them. Their -persons were even dirtier, and—for reasons into -which I need not enter—it was advisable to smoke -a strong cigar whilst they were pulling. The tides -in the Tagus run very strong; at spring-tides they -will run seven or eight knots, so considerable skill -is required in handling a boat. To do our odoriferous -whited sepulchres of boatmen justice, they -could pull, and the real workmanlike man-of-war -fashion in which our coxswain always brought the -boat alongside a ship, in spite of wind and -tremendous tide, did credit to himself, and shed a -mild reflected glory on the Legation. -</p> - -<p> -The country round Lisbon is very arid. It -produces, however, most excellent wines, both red and -white, and in my time really good wine could be -bought for fourpence a bottle. At the time of the -vintage, all the country taverns and wine shops -displayed a bush tied to a pole at their doors, as a -sign that they had new wine, "green wine," as the -Portuguese call it, for sale. Let the stranger -beware of that new wine! Though pleasant to the -palate and apparently innocuous, it is in reality -hideously intoxicating, as a reference to the 13th -verse of the second chapter of the Acts will show. -I think that the custom of tying a bush to the -door of a tavern where new wine is on sale must -be the origin of the expression "good wine needs -no bush." -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P234"></a>234}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The capabilities of this apparently intractable -and arid soil when scientifically irrigated were -convincingly shown on a farm some sixteen miles -from Lisbon, belonging to a Colonel Campbell, an -Englishman. Colonel Campbell, who had -permanently settled in Portugal, had bought from -the Government a derelict monastery and the lands -attached to it at Torres Vedras, where Wellington -entrenched himself in his famous lines in 1809-10. -A good stream of water ran through the property, -and Colonel Campbell diverted it, and literally -caused the desert to blossom like the rose. Here -were acres and acres of orange groves, and it was -one of the few places in Europe where bananas -would ripen. Colonel Campbell supplied the whole -of Lisbon with butter, and the only mutton worth -eating came also from his farm. It was a place -flowing, if not with milk and honey, at all events -with oil and wine. Here were huge tanks brimful -of amber-coloured olive oil; whilst in vast dim -cellars hundreds of barrels of red and white wine -were slowly maturing in the mysterious shadows. -Outside the sunlight fell on crates of ripe oranges -and bananas, ready packed for the Lisbon market, -and in the gardens tropical and sub-tropical -flowering trees had not only thoroughly acclimatised -themselves, but had expanded to prima-donna-like -dimensions. The great rambling tiled monastery -made a delightful dwelling-house, and to me it -will be always a place of pleasant memories—a -place of sunshine and golden orange groves; of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P235"></a>235}</span> -rustling palms and cool blue and white tiles; of -splashing fountains and old stonework smothered -in a tangle of wine-coloured Bougainvillea. -</p> - -<p> -The environs of all Portuguese towns are made -dreary by the miles and miles of high walls which -line the roads. These people must surely have -some dark secrets in their lives to require these -huge barriers between themselves and the rest of the -world. Behind the wall were pleasant old <i>quintas</i>, -or villas, faced with my favourite "azulejos" of -blue and white, and surrounded with attractive, -ill-kept gardens, where roses and oleanders ran riot -amidst groves of orange and lemon trees. -</p> - -<p> -Cintra would be a beautiful spot anywhere, but -in this sun-scorched land it comes as a surprising -revelation; a green oasis in a desolate expanse of -aridity. -</p> - -<p> -Here are great shady oak woods and tinkling -fern-fringed brooks, pleasant leafy valleys, and a -grateful sense of moist coolness. On the very -summit of the rocky hill of Pena, King Fernando -had built a fantastic dream-castle, all domes and -pinnacles. It was exactly like the "enchanted -castle" of one of Gustave Doré's illustrations, and -had, I believe, been partly designed by Doré -himself. Some of the details may have been a little -too flamboyant for sober British tastes, but, perched -on its lofty rock, this castle was surprisingly -effective from below with its gilded turrets and Moorish -tiles. As the castle occupied every inch of the -summit of the Pena hill, the only approach to it -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P236"></a>236}</span> -was by a broad winding roadway tunnelled through -the solid rock. Openings had been cut in the sides -of the tunnel giving wonderful views over the valleys -far down below. This approach was for all the -world like the rocky ways up which Parsifal is -led to the temple of the Grail in the first act of -Wagner's great mystery drama. The finest feature -about Pena, to my mind, was the wood of camellias -on its southern face. These camellias had grown -to a great size, and when in flower in March they -were a most beautiful sight. -</p> - -<p> -There was a great deal of work at the Lisbon -Legation, principally of a commercial character. -There were never-ending disputes between British -shippers and the Custom House authorities, and -the extremely dilatory methods of the Portuguese -Government were most trying to the temper at -times. -</p> - -<p> -I shall always cherish mildly agreeable recollections -of Lisbon. It was a placid, sunlit, soporific -existence, very different from the turmoil of -Petrograd life. The people were friendly, and as -hospitable as their very limited financial resources -enabled them to be. They could mostly speak French -in a fashion, still their limited vocabulary was quite -sufficient for expressing their more limited ideas. -</p> - -<p> -I never could help contrasting the splendid past -of this little nation with its somewhat inadequate -present, for it must be remembered that Portugal -in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries was the -leading maritime Power of Europe. Portugal had -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P237"></a>237}</span> -planted her colonies and her language (surely the -most hideous of all spoken idioms!) in Asia, Africa, -and South America long before Great Britain or -France had even dreamed of a Colonial Empire. -</p> - -<p> -They were a race of hardy and fearless seamen. -Prince Henry the Navigator, the son of John of -Portugal and of John of Gaunt's daughter, -discovered Madeira, the Azores, and the Cape Verde -islands in the early fourteen-hundreds. -</p> - -<p> -In the same century Diaz doubled the Cape of -Good Hope, and Vasco da Gama succeeded in -reaching India by sea, whilst Albuquerque founded -Portuguese colonies in Brazil and at Goa in India. -This race of intrepid navigators and explorers -held the command of the sea long before the Dutch -or British, and by the middle of the sixteenth -century little Portugal ranked as one of the most -powerful monarchies in Europe. -</p> - -<p> -Portugal, too, is England's oldest ally, for the -Treaty of Windsor establishing an alliance -between the two countries was signed as far back as -1386. -</p> - -<p> -This is not the place in which to enter into the -causes which led to the gradual decadence of this -wonderful little nation, sapped her energies and -atrophied her enterprise. To the historian those -causes are sufficiently familiar. -</p> - -<p> -Let us only trust that Lusitania's star may some -day rise again. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap08"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P238"></a>238}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER VIII -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Brazil—Contrast between Portuguese and Spanish South -America—Moorish traditions—Amazing beauty of Rio de -Janeiro—Yellow fever—The Commercial Court Chamberlain—The -Emperor Pedro—The Botanic Gardens of Rio—The quaint -diversions of Petropolis—The liveried young -entomologist—Buenos Ayres—The charm of the -"Camp"—Water-throwing—A British Minister in Carnival -time—Some Buenos -Ayres peculiarities—Masked balls—Climatic -conditions—Theatres—Restaurants—Wonderful bird-life of the -"Camp"—Estancis Negrete—Duck-shooting—My one -flamingo—An exploring expedition in the Gran -Chaco—Hardships—Alligators and fish—Currency difficulties. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -My first impression of Brazil was that it was a -mere transplanted Portugal, but a Portugal set -amidst the most glorious vegetation and some of -the finest scenery on the face of the globe. It is -also unquestionably suffocatingly hot. -</p> - -<p> -There is a great outward difference in the -appearances of the towns of Portuguese and Spanish -South America. In Brazil the Portuguese built -their houses and towns precisely as they had done -at home. There are the same winding irregular -streets; the same tall houses faced with the decorative -"azulejos"; the same shutterless sash-windows. -A type of house less suited to the burning climate -of Brazil can hardly be imagined. There being no -outside shutters, it is impossible to keep the heat -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P239"></a>239}</span> -out, and the small rooms become so many ovens. -The sinuosities of the irregular streets give a -curiously old-world look to a Brazilian town, so much -so that it is difficult for a European to realise that -he is on the American Continent, associated as the -latter is in our minds with unending straight lines. -</p> - -<p> -In all Spanish-American countries the towns -are laid out on the chess-board principle, with long -dreary perspectives stretching themselves endlessly. -The Spanish-American type of house too is mostly -one-storied and flat-roofed, with two iron-barred -windows only looking on to the street. The -Moorish conquerors left their impress on Spain, and the -Spanish pioneers carried across the Atlantic with -them the Moorish conception of a house. The -"patio" or enclosed court in the centre of the -house is a heritage from the Moors, as is the flat -roof or "azotea," and the decorated rainwater cistern -in the centre of the "patio." -</p> - -<p> -The very name of this tank in Spanish, "aljibe," -is of Arabic origin, and it becomes obvious that -this type of house was evolved by Mohammedans -who kept their womenkind in jealous and strict -seclusion. No indiscreet eyes from outside can -penetrate into the "patio," and after nightfall the -women could be allowed on to the flat roof to take -the air. Those familiar with the East know the -great part the roof of a house plays in the life of an -Oriental. It is their parlour, particularly after -dark. As the inhabitants of South America are -not Mohammedans, I cannot conceive why they -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P240"></a>240}</span> -obstinately adhere to this inconvenient type of -dwelling. The "patio" renders the house very -dark and airless, becomes a well of damp in winter, -and an oven in summer. To my mind unquestionably -the best form of house for a hot climate -is the Anglo-Indian bungalow, with its broad -verandahs, thatched roof, and lofty rooms. In a -bungalow some of the heat can be shut out. -</p> - -<p> -On my first arrival in Brazil, the tropics and -tropical vegetation were an unopened book to me, -and I was fairly intoxicated with their beauty. -</p> - -<p> -There is a short English-owned railway running -from Pernambuco to some unknown spot in the -interior. The manager of this railway came out -on the steamer with us, and he was good enough -to take me for a run on an engine into the heart -of the virgin forest. I shall never forget the -impression this made on me. It was like a peep into -a wholly unimagined fairyland. -</p> - -<p> -Had the calls of the mail steamer been deliberately -designed to give the stranger a cumulative -impression of the beauties of Brazil, they could -not have been more happily arranged. First of -Pernambuco in flat country, redeemed by its -splendid vegetation; then Bahia with its fine bay and -gentle hills, and lastly Rio the incomparable. -</p> - -<p> -I have seen most of the surface of this globe, -and I say deliberately, without any fear of -contradiction, that nowhere is there anything -approaching Rio in beauty. The glorious bay, two hundred -miles in circumference, dotted with islands, and -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P241"></a>241}</span> -surrounded by mountains of almost grotesquely -fantastic outlines, the whole clothed with exuberantly -luxurious tropical vegetation, makes the most -lovely picture that can be conceived. -</p> - -<p> -The straggling town in my day had not yet -blossomed into those vagaries of ultra-ornate -architecture which at present characterise it. It was -quaint and picturesque, and fitted its surroundings -admirably, the narrow crowded Ruado Ouvidor -being the centre of the fashionable life of the place. -</p> - -<p> -It will be remembered that when Gonçalves -discovered the great bay on January 1st, 1502, he -imagined that it must be the estuary of some mighty -river, and christened it accordingly "the River of -January," "Rio de Janeiro." Oddly enough, only -a few insignificant streams empty themselves into -this vast landlocked harbour. -</p> - -<p> -During my first fortnight in Rio, I thought the -view over the bay more beautiful with every fresh -standpoint I saw it from; whether from Botofogo, -or from Nichteroy on the further shore, the view -seemed more entrancingly lovely every time; and -yet over this, the fairest spot on earth, the Angel -of Death was perpetually hovering with outstretched -wings; for yellow fever was endemic at Rio then, -and yellow fever slays swiftly and surely. -</p> - -<p> -One must have lived in countries where the disease -is prevalent to realise the insane terror those -two words "yellow fever" strike into most people. -On my third visit to Rio, I was destined to contract -the disease myself, but it dealt mercifully with me, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P242"></a>242}</span> -so henceforth I am immune to yellow fever for -the remainder of my life. The ravages this fell -disease wrought in the West Indies a hundred -years ago cannot be exaggerated. Those familiar -with Michael Scott's delightful "Tom Cringle's -Log" will remember the gruesome details he gives -of a severe outbreak of the epidemic in Jamaica. In -those days "Yellow Jack" took toll of nearly fifty -per cent. of the white civil and military inhabitants -of the British West Indies, as the countless -memorial tablets in the older West Indian churches -silently testify. Before my arrival in Rio, a new -German Minister had, in spite of serious warnings, -insisted on taking a beautiful little villa on a rocky -promontory jutting into the bay. The house with -its white marble colonnades, its lovely gardens, and -the wonderful view over the mountains, was a -thing of exquisite beauty, but it bore a very evil -reputation. Within eight months the German -Minister, his secretary, and his two white German -servants were all dead of yellow fever. The Brazilians -declare that the fever is never contracted during -the daytime, but that sunset is the dangerous hour. -They also warn the foreigner to avoid fruit and -acid drinks. -</p> - -<p> -Conditions have changed since then. The cause -of the unhealthiness of Rio was a very simple one. -All the sewage of the city was discharged into the -landlocked, tideless bay, where it lay festering -under the scorching sun. An English company -tunnelled a way through the mountains direct to -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P243"></a>243}</span> -the Atlantic, and all the sewage is now discharged -there, with the result that Rio is practically free -from the dreaded disease. -</p> - -<p> -The customs of a monarchial country are like -a deep-rooted oak, they do not stand transplanting. -Where they are the result of the slow growth -of many centuries, they have adapted themselves, -so to speak, to the soil of the country of their -origin, have evolved national characteristics, and -have fitted themselves into the national life. When -transplanted into a new country, they cannot fail -to appear anachronisms, and have always a certain -element of the grotesque about them. In my time -Dom Pedro, the Emperor of Brazil, had -surrounded himself with a modified edition of the -externals of a European Court. A colleague of -mine had recently been presented to the Emperor -at the Palace of São Christovão. As is customary -on such occasions, my colleague called on the two -Court Chamberlains who were on duty at São -Christovão, and they duly returned the visit. One of -these Chamberlains, whom we will call Baron de -Feijão e Farinha, seemed reluctant to take his -departure. He finally produced a bundle of price -lists from his pocket, and assured my colleague -that he would get far better value for his money -at his (the Baron's) ready-made clothing store than -at any other similar establishment in South America. -From another pocket he then extracted a tape -measure, and in spite of my colleague's protest -passed the tape over his unwilling body to note the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P244"></a>244}</span> -stock size, in the event of an order. The Baron -de Feijão especially recommended one of his models, -"the Pall Mall," a complete suit of which could be -obtained for the nominal sum of 80,000 reis. This -appalling sum looks less alarming when reduced -to British currency, 80,000 Brazilian reis being -equal to about £7 7<i>s</i>. I am not sure that he did -not promise my colleague a commission on any -orders he could extract from other members of the -Legation. My colleague, a remarkably well-dressed -man, did not recover his equanimity for some days, -after picturing his neatly-garbed form arrayed in -the appallingly flashy, ill-cut, ready-made garments -in which the youth of Rio de Janeiro were wont -to disport themselves. To European ideas, it was -a little unusual to find a Court Chamberlain -engaged in the ready-made clothing line. -</p> - -<p> -On State occasions Dom Pedro assumed the most -splendid Imperial mantle any sovereign has ever -possessed. It was composed entirely of feathers, -being made of the breasts of toucans, shaded from -pale pink to deep rose-colour, and was the most -gorgeous bit of colour imaginable. In the sweltering -climate of Brazil, the heat of this mantle must -have been unendurable, and I always wondered -how Dom Pedro managed to bear it with a smiling -face, but it certainly looked magnificent. -</p> - -<p> -One of the industries of Rio was the manufacture -of artificial flowers from the feathers of -humming-birds. These feather flowers were -wonderfully faithful reproductions of Nature, and were -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P245"></a>245}</span> -practically indestructible, besides being most -artistically made. They were very expensive. -</p> - -<p> -The famous avenue of royal palms in the -Botanic Gardens would almost repay anyone for the -voyage from Europe. These are, I believe, the -tallest palms known, and the long avenue is -strikingly impressive. The <i>Oreodoxa regia</i>, one of the -cabbage-palms, has a huge trunk, perfectly -symmetrical, and growing absolutely straight. This -perspective of giant boles recalls the columns of -an immense Gothic cathedral, whilst the fronds -uniting in a green arch two hundred feet overhead -complete the illusion. The Botanic Gardens have -some most attractive ponds of pink and sky-blue -water lilies, and the view of the bay from the -gardens is usually considered the finest in Rio. -</p> - -<p> -Owing to the unhealthiness of Rio, most of the -Foreign Legations had established themselves -permanently at Petropolis, in the Organ Mountains, -Petropolis being well above the yellow fever zone. -On my third visit to Rio, such a terrible epidemic -of yellow fever was raging in the capital that the -British Minister very kindly invited me to go up -straight to the Legation at Petropolis. The latter -is three hours' distance from Rio by mountain -railway. People with business in the city leave -for Rio by the 7 a.m. train, and reach Petropolis -again at 7 p.m. The old Emperor, Dom Pedro, -made a point of attending the departure and -arrival of the train every single day, and a military -band played regularly in the station, morning and -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P246"></a>246}</span> -evening. This struck me as a very unusual form of -amusement. The Emperor (who ten months later -was quietly deposed) was a tall, handsome old -gentleman, of very distinguished appearance, and with -charming manners. He had also encyclopædic -knowledge on most points. That a sovereign should -take pleasure in seeing the daily train depart and -arrive seemed to point to a certain lack of resources -in Petropolis, and to hint at moments of deadly -dulness in the Imperial villa there. Dom Pedro -never appeared in public except in evening dress, -and it was a novelty to see the head of a State in -full evening dress and high hat at half-past six -in the morning, listening to an extremely indifferent -brass band braying in the waiting-room of -a shabby railway station. -</p> - -<p> -Nature seems to have lavished all the most -brilliant hues of her palette on Brazil; the plumage -of the birds, the flowers, and foliage all glow with -vivid colour. Even a Brazilian toad has bright -emerald-green spots all over him. The gorgeous -butterflies of this highly-coloured land are well -known in Europe, especially those lovely creatures -of shimmering, iridescent blue. -</p> - -<p> -These butterflies were the cause of a considerable -variation in the hours of meals at the British -Legation. -</p> - -<p> -The Minister had recently brought out to Brazil -an English boy to act as young footman. Henry -was a most willing, obliging lad, but these great -Brazilian butterflies exercised a quite irresistible -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P247"></a>247}</span> -fascination over him, and small blame to him. -He kept a butterfly-net in the pantry, and the -instant one of the brilliant, glittering creatures -appeared in the garden, Henry forgot everything. -Clang the front-door bell so loudly, he paid no heed -to it; the cook might be yelling for him to carry -the luncheon into the dining-room, Henry turned -a deaf ear to her entreaties. Snatching up his -butterfly-net, he would dart through the window in -hot pursuit. As these great butterflies fly like -Handley Pages, he had his work cut out for him, -and running is exhausting in a temperature of 90 -degrees. The usual hour for luncheon would be long -past, and the table would still exhibit a virgin -expanse of white cloth. Somewhere in the dim -distance we could descry a slim young figure bounding -along hot-foot, with butterfly-net poised aloft, so -we possessed our souls in patience. Eventually -Henry would reappear, moist but triumphant, or -dripping and despondent, according to his success -or failure with his shimmering quarry. After such -violent exercise, Henry had to have a plunge in the -swimming-bath and a complete change of clothing -before he could resume his duties, all of which -occasioned some little further delay. And this would -happen every day, so our repasts may be legitimately -described as "movable feasts." It was no -use speaking to Henry. He would promise to -be less forgetful, but the next butterfly that came -flitting along drove all good resolves out of this -ardent young entomologist's head, and off he would -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P248"></a>248}</span> -go on flying feet in eager pursuit. I recommended -Henry when he returned to England to take up -cross-country running seriously. He seemed to have -unmistakable aptitudes for it. -</p> - -<p> -The streets of Petropolis were planted with -avenues of a flowering tree imported from the -Southern Pacific. When in bloom, this tree was -so covered with vivid pink blossoms that all its -leaves were hidden. These rows of bright pink -trees gave the dull little town a curious -resemblance to a Japanese fan. -</p> - -<p> -There are some lovely little nooks and corners -in the Organ Mountains. One ravine in particular -was most beautiful, with a cascade dashing down -the cliff, and the clear brook below it fringed with -eucharis lilies, and the tropical begonias which we -laboriously cultivate in stove-houses. Unfortunately, -these beauty spots seemed as attractive to snakes -as they were to human beings. This entailed -keeping a watchful eye on the ground, for Brazilian -snakes are very venomous. -</p> - -<p> -No greater contrast can be imagined than that -between the forests and mountains of steamy Brazil -and the endless, treeless, dead-flat levels of the -Argentine Republic, twelve hundred miles south of -them. -</p> - -<p> -When I first knew Buenos Ayres in the early -"'eighties," it still retained an old-world air of -distinction. The narrow streets were lined with -sombre, dignified old buildings of a markedly Spanish -type, and the modern riot of over-ornate ginger-bread -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P249"></a>249}</span> -architecture had not yet transformed the -city into a glittering, garish trans-Atlantic -pseudo-Paris. In the same way newly-acquired wealth -had not begun to assert itself as blatantly as it has -since done. -</p> - -<p> -I confess that I was astonished to find two -daily English newspapers in Buenos Ayres, for I -had not realised the size and importance of the -British commercial colony there. -</p> - -<p> -The "Camp" (from the Spanish <i>campo</i>, country) -outside the city is undeniably ugly and featureless, -as it stretches its unending khaki-coloured, -treeless flatness to the horizon, but the sense of -immense space has something exhilarating about -it, and the air is perfectly glorious. In time these -vast dun-coloured levels exercise a sort of a -fascination over one; to me the "Camp" will always -be associated with the raucous cries of the -thousands of spurred Argentine plovers, as they wheel -over the horsemen with their never-ending scream -of "téro, téro." -</p> - -<p> -As in most countries of Spanish origin, the -Carnival was kept at Buenos Ayres in the -old-fashioned style. In my time, on the last day of -the Carnival, Shrove Tuesday, the traditional -water-throwing was still allowed in the streets. -Everyone going into the streets must be prepared for -being drenched with water from head to foot. My -new Chief, whom I will call Sir Edward (though -he happened to have a totally different name), -had just arrived in Buenos Ayres. He was quite -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P250"></a>250}</span> -unused to South American ways. On Shrove -Tuesday I came down to breakfast in an old suit -of flannels and a soft shirt and collar, for from -my experiences of the previous year I knew what -was to be expected in the streets. Sir Edward, -a remarkably neat dresser, appeared beautifully -arrayed in a new suit, the smartest of bow-ties, and -a yellow jean waistcoat. I pointed out to my Chief -that it was water-throwing day, and suggested the -advisability of his wearing his oldest clothes. Sir -Edward gave me to understand that he imagined that -few people would venture to throw water over her -Britannic Majesty's representative. Off we started -on foot for the Chancery of the Legation, which -was situated a good mile from our house. I knew -what was coming. In the first five minutes we -got a bucket of water from the top of a house, -plumb all over us, soaking us both to the skin. -Sir Edward was speechless with rage for a minute -or so, after which I will not attempt to reproduce -his language. Men were selling everywhere in the -streets the large squirts ("<i>pomitos</i>" in Spanish) -which are used on these occasions. I equipped -myself with a perfect Woolwich Arsenal of <i>pomitos</i>, -but Sir Edward waved them all disdainfully away. -Soon two girls darted out of an open doorway, -armed with <i>pomitos</i>, and caught us each fairly in -the face, after which they giggled and ran into their -house, leaving the front door open. Sir Edward -fairly danced with rage on the pavement, shouting -out the most uncomplimentary opinions as to the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P251"></a>251}</span> -Argentine Republic and its inhabitants. The front -door having been left open, I was entitled by all -the laws of Carnival time to pursue our two fair -assailants into their house, and I did so, in spite -of Sir Edward's remonstrances. I chased the two -girls into the drawing-room, where we experienced -some little difficulty in clambering over sofas and -tables, and I finally caught them in the dining-room, -where a venerable lady, probably their grandmother, -was reposing in an armchair. I gave the two girls -a thorough good soaking from my <i>pomitos</i>, and -bestowed the mildest sprinkling on their aged -relative, who was immensely gratified by the attention. -"Oh! my dears," she cried in Spanish to the girls, -"you both consider me so old. You can see that -I am not too old for this young man to enjoy -paying me a little compliment." -</p> - -<p> -<i>Autres pays, autres moeurs</i>! Just conceive the -feelings of an ordinary British middle-class -householder, residing, let us say, at Balham or -Wandsworth, at learning that the sanctity of "The -Laurels" or "Ferndale" had been invaded by a total -stranger; that his daughters had been pursued -round the house, and then soaked with water in his -own dining-room, and that even his aged mother's -revered white hairs had not preserved her from a -like indignity. I cannot imagine him accepting it -as a humorous everyday incident. Our progress -to the Chancery was punctuated by several more -interludes of a similar character, and I was really -pained on reaching the shelter of our official -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P252"></a>252}</span> -sanctuary to note how Sir Edward's spotless garments -had suffered. Personally, on a broiling February -day (corresponding with August in the northern -hemisphere) I thought the cool water most -refreshing. Our Chancery looked on to the fashionable -Calle Florida, and a highly respectable German -widow who had lived for thirty years in South -America acted as our housekeeper. Sir Edward, -considerably ruffled in his temper, sat down to -continue a very elaborate memorandum he was -drawing up on the new Argentine Customs tariff. -The subject was a complicated one, there were -masses of figures to deal with, and the work -required the closest concentration. Presently our -housekeeper, Fran Bauer, entered the room -demurely, and made her way to Sir Edward's table, -</p> - -<p> -"Wenn Excellenz so gut sein werden um zu -entschuldigen," began Frau Bauer with downcast -eyes, and then suddenly with a discreet titter she -produced a large <i>pomito</i> from under her apron -and, secure in the license of Carnival time, she -thrust it into Sir Edward's collar, and proceeded -to squirt half a pint of cold water down his back, -retiring swiftly with elderly coyness amid an -explosion of giggles. I think that I have seldom -seen a man in such a furious rage. I will not -attempt to reproduce Sir Edward's language, for -the printer would have exhausted his entire stock -of "blanks" before I had got halfway through. -The Minister, when he had eased his mind sufficiently, -snapped out, "It is obvious that with all -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P253"></a>253}</span> -this condemned (that was not quite the word he -used) foolery going on, it is impossible to do any -serious work to-day. Where ... where ... can -one buy the infernal squirts these condemned idiots -vise?" "Anywhere in the streets. Shall I buy you -some, Sir Edward?" "Yes, get me a lot of them, -and the biggest you can find." So we parted. -</p> - -<p> -Returning home after a moist but enjoyable -afternoon, I saw a great crowd gathered at the -junction of two streets, engaged in a furious water-fight. -The central figure was a most disreputable-looking -individual with a sodden wisp of linen -where his collar should have been; remnants of a -tie trailed dankly down, his soaked garments were -shapeless, and his head was crowned with a sort of -dripping poultice. He was spouting water in all -directions like the Crystal Palace fountains in -their heyday, with shouts of "Take that, you foolish -female; and that, you fat feminine Argentine!" With -grief I recognised in this damp reveller her -Britannic Majesty's Minister Plenipotentiary. -</p> - -<p> -Upon returning home, we found that our two -English servants had been having the time of their -lives. They had stood all day on the roof of the -house, dashing pails of water over passers-by until -they had completely emptied the cistern. There -was not one drop of water in the house, and we -had to borrow three pailfuls from a complaisant -neighbour. -</p> - -<p> -A few years later the police prohibited water-throwing -altogether, so this feature of a Buenos -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P254"></a>254}</span> -Ayres Carnival is now a thing of the past. -</p> - -<p> -As time went on I grew very fond of Sir Edward. -His temper may have flared up quickly, but it -died down just as rapidly. He was a man with -an extraordinarily varied fund of information, and -possessed a very original and subtle sense of -humour. He was also a great stylist in writing -English, and the drafts I wrote for despatches -were but seldom fortunate enough to meet with -his approval. A split infinitive brought him to the -verge of tears. The Argentine authorities were -by no means easy to deal with, and Sir Edward -handled them in a masterly fashion. His quiet -persistence usually achieved its object. It was a -real joy to see him dealing with anyone rash -enough to attempt to bully or browbeat him. His -tongue could sting like a lash on occasions, whilst -he preserved an outward air of imperturbable calm. -Sir Edward both spoke and wrote the most -beautifully finished Spanish. -</p> - -<p> -A ball in a private house at Buenos Ayres had -its peculiar features in the "'eighties." In the -first place, none of the furniture was removed -from the rooms, and so far from taking up carpets, -carpets were actually laid down, should the rooms -be unprovided with them. This rendered dancing -somewhat difficult; in fact a ball resolved itself -into a leisurely arm-in-arm promenade to music -through the rooms, steering an erratic course -between the articles of furniture, "drawing the port," -as a Scottish curler would put it. Occasionally a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P255"></a>255}</span> -space behind a sofa could be found sufficiently -large to attempt a few mild gyrations, but that -was all. The golden youth of Buenos Ayres, in -the place of the conventional white evening tie, -all affected the most deplorable bows of pale pink -or pale green satin. A wedding, too, differed from -the European routine. The parents of the bride -gave a ball. At twelve o'clock dancing, or -promenading amidst the furniture, ceased. A portable -altar was brought into the room; a priest made -his unexpected entry, and the young couple were -married at breakneck speed. At the conclusion -of the ceremony, all the young men darted at the -bride and tore her marriage-veil to shreds. Priest, -altar, and the newly-married couple then disappeared; -the band struck up again, and dancing, or -rather a leisurely progress round the sofas and -ottomans, recommenced. -</p> - -<p> -A form of entertainment that appeals immensely -to people of Spanish blood is a masked ball. In -Buenos Ayres the ladies only were masked, which -gave them a distinct advantage over the men. To -enjoy a masquerade a good knowledge of Spanish -is necessary. All masked women are addressed -indiscriminately as "mascarita" and can be -"tutoyée'd." Convention permits, too, anything within -reasonable limits to be said by a man to "mascaritas," -who one and all assume a little high-pitched -head-voice to conceal their identities. I fancy that -the real attractions masquerades had for most -women lay in the opportunity they afforded every -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P256"></a>256}</span> -"mascarita" of saying with impunity abominably -rude things to some other woman whom she detested. -I remember one "mascarita," an acquaintance -of mine, whose identity I pierced at once, -giving another veiled form accurate details not -only as to the date when the pearly range of teeth -she was exhibiting to the world had come into -her possession, but also the exact price she had -paid for them. -</p> - -<p> -It takes a stranger from the North some little -time to accustom himself to the inversion of -seasons and of the points of the compass in the -southern hemisphere. For instance, "a lovely spring -day in <i>October</i>," or "a chilly autumn evening in -<i>May</i>," rings curiously to our ears; as it does to -hear of a room with a cool <i>southern</i> aspect, or to -hear complaints about the hot <i>north</i> wind. Personally -I did not dislike the north wind; it was certainly -moist and warm, but it smelt deliciously fragrant -with a faint spicy odour after its journey -over the great Brazilian forests on its way from -the Equator. All Argentines seemed to feel the -north wind terribly; it gave them headaches, and -appeared to dislocate their entire nervous system. -In the Law Courts it was held to be a mitigating -circumstance should it be proved that a murder, or -other crime of violence, had been committed after -a long spell of north wind. Many women went -about during a north wind with split beans on their -temples to soothe their headaches, a comical sight -till one grew accustomed to it. The old German -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P257"></a>257}</span> -housekeeper of the Chancery, Frau Bauer, invariably -had split beans adhering to her temples when -the north wind blew. -</p> - -<p> -The icy <i>pampero</i>, the south wind direct from -the Pole, was the great doctor of Buenos Ayres. -Darwin used to consider the River Plate the -electrical centre of the world. Nowhere have I -experienced such terrific thunderstorms as in the -Argentine. Sometimes on a stifling summer night, -with the thermometer standing at nearly a hundred -degrees, one of these stupendous storms would break -over the city with floods of rain. Following on -the storm would come the <i>pampero</i>, gently at first, -but increasing in violence until a blustering, -ice-cold gale went roaring through the sweltering city, -bringing the temperature down in four hours with -a run from 100 degrees to 60 degrees. Extremely -pleasant for those like myself with sound lungs; -very dangerous to those with delicate chests. -</p> - -<p> -The old-fashioned Argentine house had no -protection over the <i>patio</i>. In bad weather the -occupants had to make their way through the rain from -one room to another. Some of the newer houses -were built in a style which I have seen nowhere -else except on the stage. Everyone is familiar with -those airy dwellings composed principally of open -colonnades one sees on stage back-cloths. These -houses were very similar in design, with open halls -of columns and arches, and open-air staircases. On -the stage it rains but seldom, and the style may be -suited to the climatic conditions prevailing there. -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P258"></a>258}</span> -In real life it must be horribly inconvenient. The -Italian Minister at Buenos Ayres lived in a house -of this description. In fine weather it looked -extremely picturesque, but I imagine that his -Excellency's progress to bed must have been -attended with some difficulties when, during a -thunderstorm, the rain poured in cataracts down his -open-air staircase, and the <i>pampero</i> howled through -his open arcades and galleries. -</p> - -<p> -The theatres at Buenos Ayres were quite -excellent. At the Opera all the celebrated singers -of Europe could be heard, although one could -almost have purchased a nice little freehold -property near London for the price asked for a seat. -There were two French theatres, one devoted to -light opera, the other to Palais Royal farces, both -admirably given; and, astonishingly enough, during -part of my stay, there was actually an English -theatre with an English stock company. A -peculiarly Spanish form of entertainment is the -"Zarzuela," a sort of musical farce. It requires a -fairly intimate knowledge of the language to follow -these pieces with their many topical allusions. -</p> - -<p> -The Spanish-American temperament seems to -dislike instinctively any gloomy or morbid dramas, -differing widely from the Russians in this respect. -At Petrograd, on the Russian stage, the plays, in -addition to the usual marital difficulties, were -brightened up by allusions to such cheerful topics -as inherited tendencies to kleptomania or suicide, -or an intense desire for self-mutilation. What -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P259"></a>259}</span> -appeals to the morbid frost-bound North apparently -fails to attract the light-hearted sons of the -southern hemisphere. -</p> - -<p> -Buenos Ayres was also a city of admirable -restaurants. In the fashionable places, resplendent -with mirrors, coloured marbles and gilding, the -cooking rivals Paris, and the bill, when tendered, -makes one inclined to rush to the telegraph office -to cable for further and largely increased -remittances from Europe. There were a number, -however, of unpretending French restaurants of the -most meritorious description. Never shall I forget -Sir Edward's face when, in answer to his questions -as to a light supper, the waiter suggested a -cold armadillo; a most excellent dish, by the way, -though after seeing the creature in the Zoological -Gardens one would hardly credit it with gastronomic -possibilities. The soil of the Argentine -is marvellously fertile, and some day it will become -a great wine-growing country. In the meantime -vast quantities of inferior wine are imported from -Europe. After sampling a thin Spanish red wine, -and a heavy sweet black wine known as Priorato, -and having tested their effects on his digestion, -Sir Edward christened them "The red wine of -Our Lady of Pain" and "The black wine of -Death." -</p> - -<p> -When the President of the Republic appeared -in public on great occasions, he was always preceded -by a man carrying a large blue velvet bolster -embroidered with the Argentine arms. This was -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P260"></a>260}</span> -clearly an emblem of national sovereignty, but what -this blue bolster was intended to typify I never -could find out. Did it indicate that it was the duty -of the President to bolster up the Republic, or -did it signify that the Republic was always ready -to bolster up its President? None of my Argentine -friends could throw any light upon the subject -further than by saying that this bolster was always -carried in front of the President; a sufficiently -self-evident fact. It will always remain an enigma to -me. A bolster seems a curiously soporific emblem -for a young, enterprising, and progressive -Republic to select as its symbol. -</p> - -<p> -It would be ungallant to pass over without -remark the wonderful beauty of the Argentine -girls. This beauty is very shortlived indeed, and -owing to their obstinate refusal to take any -exercise whatever, feminine outlines increase in bulk -at an absurdly early age, but between seventeen -and twenty-one many of them are really lovely. -Lolling in hammocks and perpetual chocolate-eating -bring about their own penalties, and sad to say, -bring them about very quickly. I must add that -the attractiveness of these girls is rather physical -than intellectual. -</p> - -<p> -The house Sir Edward and I rented had been -originally built for a stage favourite by one of her -many warm-hearted admirers. It had been furnished -according to the lady's own markedly florid -tastes. I reposed nightly in a room entirely draped -in sky-blue satin. The house had a charming garden, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P261"></a>261}</span> -and Sir Edward and I expended a great deal -of trouble and a considerable amount of money -on it. That garden was the pride of our hearts, -but we had reckoned without the leaf-cutting ant, -the great foe of the horticulturist in South -America. At Rio, and in other places in Brazil, they -had a special apparatus for pumping the fumes -of burning sulphur into the ant-holes, and so were -enabled to keep these pests in check. In private -gardens in Brazil every single specially cherished -plant had to have its stem surrounded with unsightly -circular troughs of paraffin and water. In -front of our windows we had a large bed of -gardenias backed by a splendid border of many-hued -cannas which were the apple of Sir Edward's eye, -He gazed daily on them with an air not only of -pride, but of quasi-paternity. The leaf-cutting ants -found their way into our garden, and in four days -nothing remained of our beautiful gardenias and -cannas but some black, leafless stalks. These -abominable insects swept our garden as bare of every -green thing as a flight of locusts would have done; -they even killed the grass where their serried -processions had passed. -</p> - -<p> -For me, the great charm of the Argentine lay -in the endless expanses of the "Camp," far away -from the noisy city. The show <i>estancia</i> of the -Argentine was in those days "Negrete," the -property of Mr. David Shennan, kindest and most -hospitable of Scotsmen. Most English residents -and visitors out in the Plate cherish grateful -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P262"></a>262}</span> -recollections of that pleasant spot, encircled by peach -orchards, where the genial proprietor, like a -patriarch of old, welcomed his guests, surrounded by -his vast herds and flocks. I happen to know the -exact number of head of cattle Mr. Shennan had -on his estancia on January 1, 1884, for I was one -of the counters at the stocktaking on the last day -of the year. The number was 18,731 head. -</p> - -<p> -Counting cattle is rather laborious work, and -needs close concentration. Six of us were in the -saddle from daybreak to dusk, with short intervals -for meals, and December 31 is at the height of the -summer in the southern hemisphere, so the heat -was considerable. -</p> - -<p> -This is the method employed in a "count." The -cattle are driven into "mobs" of some eight -hundred ("Rodeo" is the Spanish term for mob) -by the "peons." Some twenty tame bullocks are -driven a quarter of a mile from the "mob," and -the counters line up on their horses between the -two, with their pockets full of beans. The "peons" -use their whips, and one or two of the cattle break -away from the herd to the tame bullocks. They -are followed by more and more at an ever-increasing -pace. Each one is counted, and when -one hundred is reached, a bean is silently transferred -from the left pocket to the right. So the process -is continued until the entire herd has passed by. -Should the numbers given by the six counters tally -within reason, the count is accepted. Should it -differ materially, there is a recount; then the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P263"></a>263}</span> -counters pass on to another "mob" some two -miles away. Under a very hot sun, the strain of -continual attention is exhausting, and those six -counters found their beds unusually welcome that -night. -</p> - -<p> -The dwelling-house of Negrete, which was to -become very familiar to me, was over a hundred -years old, and stretched itself one-storied round a -large <i>patio</i>, blue and white tiled, with an elaborate -well-head in the centre decorated with good -iron-work. The <i>patio</i> was fragrant with orange and -lemon trees, and great bushes of the lovely -sky-blue Paraguayan jasmine. I can never understand -why this shrub, the "Jasmin del Paraguay," -with its deliciously sweet perfume and showy blue -flowers, has never been introduced into England. -It would have to be grown under glass, but only -requires sufficient heat to keep the frost out. -</p> - -<p> -I had never felt the <i>joie de vivre</i>—the sheer joy -at being alive—thrill through one's veins so -exultantly as when riding over the "Camp" in early -morning. I have had the same feeling on the High -Veldt in South Africa, where there is the same -marvellous air, and, in spite of the undulations of -the ground, the same sense of vast space. The -glorious air, the sunlight, the limitless, treeless -expanse of neutral-tinted grass stretching endlessly -to the horizon, and the vast hemisphere of blue -sky above had something absolutely intoxicating in -them. It may have been the delight of forgetting -that there were such things as towns, and streets, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P264"></a>264}</span> -and tramways. And then the teeming bird-life of -the camp! Ibis and egrets flashed bronze-green or -snowy-white through the sunlight; the beautiful -pink spoon-bills flapped noisily overhead in single -file, a lengthy rosy trail of long legs and necks and -brilliant colour; the quaint little ground owls blinked -from the entrances of their burrows, and dozens of -spurred plovers wheeled in incessant gyrations, -keeping up their endless, wearying scream of -"téro-téro." I always wanted to shout and sing from -sheer delight at being part of it all. -</p> - -<p> -The tinamou, the South American partridge, -surprisingly stupid birds, rose almost under the horses' -feet, and dozens of cheery little sandpipers darted -about in all directions. Birds, birds everywhere! -Should one pass near one of the great shallow -lagoons, which are such a feature of the country, its -surface would be black with ducks, with perhaps a -regiment of flamingoes in the centre of it, a -dazzling patch of sunlit scarlet, against the turquoise -blue the water reflected from the sky. -</p> - -<p> -In springtime the "Camp" is covered with the -trailing verbena which in my young days was such -a favourite bedding-out plant in England, its flowers -making a brilliant league-long carpet of scarlet -or purple. -</p> - -<p> -There are endless opportunities for shooting on -the "Camp" in the Province of Buenos Ayres, -only limited by the difficulties in obtaining cartridges, -and the fact that in places where it is impossible -to dispose of the game the amount shot must depend -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P265"></a>265}</span> -on what can be eaten locally. Otherwise it -is not sport, but becomes wanton slaughter. -</p> - -<p> -The foolish tinamou are easily shot, but are -exceedingly difficult to retrieve out of the knee-high -grass, and if only winged, they can run like hares. -There is also a large black and white migratory bird -of the snipe family, the "batitou," which appears -from the frozen regions of the Far South, as winter -comes on, and is immensely prized for the table. -He is unquestionably a delicious bird to eat, but -is very hard to approach owing to his wariness. -The duck-shooting was absolutely unequalled. I -had never before known that there were so many -ducks in the world, nor were there the same -complicated preliminaries, as with us; no keepers, no -beaters, no dogs were required. One simply put -twenty cartridges in a bandolier, took one's gun, -jumped on a horse, and rode six miles or so to a -selected lagoon. Here the horse was tied up to the -nearest fence, and one just walked into the lagoon. -So warm was the water in these lagoons that I -have stood waist-high in it for hours without feeling -the least chilly, or suffering from any ill effects -whatever. With the first step came a mighty and -stupendous roar of wings, and a prodigious quacking, -then the air became black with countless thousands -of ducks. Mallards, shovellers, and speckled -ducks; black ducks with crimson feet and bills; the -great black and white birds Argentines call "Royal" -ducks, and we "Muscovy" ducks, though with -us they are uninteresting inhabitants of a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P266"></a>266}</span> -farm-yard. Ducks, ducks everywhere! As these -confiding fowl never thought of flying away, but kept -circling over the lagoon again and again, I am -sure that anyone, given sufficient cartridges, and -the inclination to do so, could easily have killed five -hundred of them to his own gun in one day. We -limited ourselves to ten apiece. Splashing about in -the lagoon, it was easy to pick up the dead birds -without a dog, but no one who has not carried them -can have any idea of the weight of eight ducks in -a gamebag pressing on one's back, or can conceive -how difficult it is to get into the saddle on a -half-broken horse with this weight dragging you -backwards. In any other country but the Argentine, -to canter home six miles dripping wet would have -resulted in a severe chill. No one ever seemed the -worse for it out there. -</p> - -<p> -At times I went into the lagoons without a gun, -just to observe at close quarters the teeming -water-life there. The raucous screams of the vigilant -"téro-téros" warned the water-birds of a hostile -approach, but it was easy to sit down in the -shallow warm water amongst the reeds until the alarm -had died down, and one was amply repaid for it, -though the enforced lengthy abstention from -tobacco was trying. -</p> - -<p> -The "Camp" is a great educator. One learnt -there to recap empty cartridge-cases with a -machine, and to reload them. One learnt too to clean -guns and saddlery. When a thing remains undone, -unless you take it in hand yourself, you begin wondering -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P267"></a>267}</span> -why you should ever have left these things -to be done for you by others. The novice finds -out that a bridle and bit are surprisingly difficult -objects to clean, even given unlimited oil and -sandpaper. The "Camp" certainly educates, and -teaches the neophyte independence. -</p> - -<p> -I shot several pink spoonbills, one of which in -a glass case is not far from me as I write, but I -simply longed to get a scarlet flamingo. Owing -to the spoonbills' habit of flitting from lagoon to -lagoon, they are not difficult to shoot, but a flamingo -is a very wary bird. Perched on one leg, they -stand in the very middle of a lagoon, and allow -no one within gunshot. The officious "téro-téros" -effectually notify them of the approach of man, -and possibly the flamingoes have learnt from "Alice -in Wonderland" that the Queen of Hearts is in -the habit of utilising them as croquet-mallets. The -natural anxiety to escape so ignominious a fate -would tend to make them additionally cautious. -Anyhow, I found it impossible to approach them. -The idea occurred to me of trying to shoot one with -a rifle. So I crawled prostrate on my anatomy up -to the lagoon. I failed at least six times, but -finally succeeded in killing a flamingo. Wading into -the lagoon, I triumphantly retrieved my scarlet -victim, and took him by train to Buenos Ayres, -intending to hand him over to a taxidermist next -day. When I awoke next morning, the blue satin -bower in which I slept (originally fitted up, as I -have explained, as the bedroom of a minor light of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P268"></a>268}</span> -the operatic stage) was filled with a pestilential -smell of decayed fish. I inquired the reason of my -English servant, who informed me that the cook was -afraid that there was something wrong about "the -queer duck" I had brought home last night, as -its odour was not agreeable. (The real expression -he used was "smelling something cruel.") Full -of horrible forebodings, I jumped out of bed and -ran down to the kitchen, to find a little heap of -brilliant scarlet feathers reposing on the table, and -Paquita, our fat Andalusian cook, regarding with -doubtful eyes a carcase slowly roasting before the -fire, and filling the place with unbelievably -poisonous effluvia. And that was the end of the only -flamingo I ever succeeded in shooting. -</p> - -<p> -A London financial house had, by foreclosing a -mortgage, come into possession of a great tract -of land in the unsurveyed and uncharted Indian -Reserve, the Gran Chaco. Anxious to ascertain -whether their newly-acquired property was suited -for white settlers, the financial house sent out two -representatives to Buenos Ayres with orders to -fit out a little expedition to survey and explore it. -I was invited to join this expedition, and as work -was slack at the time, Sir Edward did not require -my services and gave me leave to go. I had been -warned that conditions would be very rough indeed, -but the opportunity seemed one of those that only -occur once in a lifetime, and too good to be lost. -I do not think the invitation was quite a disinterested -one. The leaders of the expedition probably -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P269"></a>269}</span> -thought that the presence of a member of the British -Legation might be useful in case of difficulties -with the Argentine authorities. I travelled by -steamer six hundred miles up the mighty Paraná, -and joined the other members of the expedition at -the Alexandra Colony, a little English settlement -belonging to the London firm hundreds of miles from -anywhere, and surrounded by vast swamps. The -Alexandra Colony was a most prosperous little -community, but was unfortunately infested with -snakes and every imaginable noxious stinging -insect. As we should have to cross deep swamps -perpetually, we took no wagons with us, but our -baggage was loaded on pack-horses. For provisions -we took jerked sun-dried beef (very similar to the -South African "biltong"), hard biscuit, flour, -coffee, sugar, and salt, as well as several bottles of -rum, guns, rifles, plenty of ammunition, and two -blankets apiece. We had some thirty horses in -all; the loose horses trotting obediently behind a -bell-mare, according to their convenient Argentine -custom. In Argentina mares are never ridden, and -a bell-mare serves the same purpose in keeping -the "tropilla" of horses together as does a -bellwether in keeping sheep together with us. At night -only the bell-mare need be securely picketed; the -horses will not stray far from the sound of her -tinkling bell. Should the bell-mare break loose, there -is the very devil to pay; all the others will follow -her. It will thus be seen that the bell-mare plays -a very important part. In French families the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P270"></a>270}</span> -<i>belle-mère</i> fills an equally important position. We -were four Englishmen in all; the two leaders, the -doctor, and myself. The doctor was quite a -youngster, taking a final outing before settling down to -serious practice in Bristol. A nice, cheery youth! -The first night I discovered how very hard the -ground is to sleep upon, but our troubles did not -begin till the second day. We were close up to -the tropics, and got into great swamps where -millions and millions of mosquitoes attacked us day -and night, giving us no rest. Our hands got so -swollen with bites that we could hardly hold our -reins, and sleep outside our blankets was -impossible with these humming, buzzing tormentors -devouring us. If one attempted to baffle them by -putting one's head under the blanket, the stifling -heat made sleep equally difficult. In four days we -reached a waterless land; that is to say, there were -clear streams in abundance, but they were all of -salt, bitter, alkaline water, undrinkable by man or -beast. Oddly enough, all the clear streams were -of bitter water, whereas the few muddy ones were -of excellent drinking water. I think these alkaline -streams are peculiar to the interior of South -America. Our horses suffered terribly; so did we. We -had three Argentine gauchos with us, to look after -the horses and baggage, besides two pure Indians. -One of these Indians, known by the pretty name -of Chinche, or "The Bug," could usually find -water-holes by watching the flight of the birds. -The water in these holes was often black and fetid, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P271"></a>271}</span> -yet we drank it greedily. Chinche could also get a -little water out of some kinds of aloes by cutting -the heart out of the plant. In the resulting cavity -about half a glassful of water, very bitter to the -taste, but acceptable all the same, collected in time. -Prolonged thirst under a hot sun is very difficult -to bear. We nearly murdered the doctor, for he -insisted on recalling the memories of great cool -tankards of shandy-gaff in Thames-side hostelries, -and at our worst times of drought had a maddening -trick of imitating (exceedingly well too) the -tinkling of ice against the sides of a long tumbler. -</p> - -<p> -In spite of thirst and the accursed mosquitoes -it was an interesting trip. We were where few, if -any, white men had been before us; the scenery -was pretty; and game was very plentiful. The open -rolling, down-like country, with its little copses -and single trees, was like a gigantic edition of some -English park in the southern counties. In the -early morning certain trees, belonging to the -cactus family, I imagine, were covered with brilliant -clusters of flowers, crimson, pink, and white. As -the sun increased in heat all these flowers closed up -like sea anemones, to reopen again after sunset. -The place crawled with deer, and so tame and -unsophisticated were they that it seemed cruel to take -advantage of them and to shoot them. We had to -do so for food, for we lived almost entirely on -venison, and venison is a meat I absolutely detest. -When food is unpalatable, one is surprised to find -how very little is necessary to sustain life; an -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P272"></a>272}</span> -experience most of us have repeated during these last -two years, not entirely voluntarily. Chinche, the -Indian, could see the tracks of any beasts in the -dew at dawn, where my eyes could detect nothing -whatever. In this way I was enabled to shoot a -fine jaguar, whose skin has reposed for thirty years -in my dining-room. One night, too, an ant-eater -blundered into our camp, and by some extraordinary -fluke I shot him in the dark. His skin now -keeps his compatriot company. An ant-eating bear -is a very shy and wary animal, and as he is -nocturnal in his habits, he is but rarely met with, so -this was a wonderful bit of luck. We encountered -large herds of peccaries, the South American wild -boar. These little beasts are very fierce and -extremely pugnacious, and the horses seemed frightened -of them. The flesh of the peccary is excellent -and formed a most welcome variation to the eternal -venison. I never could learn to shoot from the -saddle as Argentines do, but had to slip off my horse -to fire. I was told afterwards that it was very -dangerous to do this with these savage little -peccaries. -</p> - -<p> -There are always compensations to be found -everywhere. Had not the abominable mosquitoes -prevented sleep, one would not have gazed up for -hours at the glorious constellations of the Southern -sky, including that arch-impostor the Southern -Cross, glittering in the dark-blue bowl of the clear -tropical night sky. Had we not suffered so from -thirst, we should have appreciated less the unlimited -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P273"></a>273}</span> -foaming beer we found awaiting us on our return -to the Alexandra Colony. By the way, all South -Americans believe firmly in moon-strokes, and will -never let the moon's rays fall on their faces whilst -sleeping. -</p> - -<p> -I judged the country we traversed quite unfitted -for white settlers, owing to the lack of good water, -and the evil-smelling swamps that cut the land up -so. That exploring trip was doubtless pleasanter -in retrospect than in actual experience. I would -not have missed it, though, for anything, for it -gave one an idea of stern realities. -</p> - -<p> -On returning to the Alexandra Colony, both I -and the doctor, a remarkably fair-skinned young -man, found, after copious ablutions, that our faces -and hands had been burnt so black by the sun that -we could easily have taken our places with the now -defunct Moore and Burgess minstrels in the vanished -St. James's Hall in Piccadilly without having -to use any burnt-cork whatever. -</p> - -<p> -On the evening of our arrival at Alexandra, I -was reading in the sitting-room in an armchair -against the wall. The doctor called out to me to -keep perfectly still, and not to move on any -account until he returned. He came back with a -pickle-jar and a bottle. I smelt the unmistakable -odour of chloroform, and next minute the doctor -triumphantly exhibited an immense tarantula spider -in the pickle-jar. He had cleverly chloroformed the -venomous insect within half an inch of my head, -otherwise I should certainly have been bitten. The -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P274"></a>274}</span> -bite of these great spiders, though not necessarily -fatal, is intensely painful. -</p> - -<p> -The doctor had brought out with him a complete -anti-snake-bite equipment, and was always longing -for an occasion to use it. He was constantly -imploring us to go and get bitten by some highly -venomous snake, in order to give him an opportunity -of testing the efficacy of his drugs, hypodermic -syringes, and lancets. At Alexandra a dog -did get bitten by a dangerous snake, and was at -once brought to the doctor, who injected his snake-bite -antidote, with the result that the dog died on -the spot. -</p> - -<p> -A river ran through Alexandra which was simply -alive with fish, also with alligators. In the upper -reaches of the Paraná and its tributaries, bathing is -dangerous not only because of the alligators, but -on account of an abominable little biting-fish. These -biting-fish, which go about in shoals, are not unlike -a flounder in appearance and size. They have very -sharp teeth and attack voraciously everything that -ventures into the water. In that climate their -bites are very liable to bring on lockjaw. The -doctor and I spent most of our time along this -river with fishing lines and rifles, for alligators -had still the charm of novelty to us both, and we -both delighted in shooting these revolting saurians. -I advise no one to try to skin a dead alligator. -There are thousands of sinews to be cut through, and -the pestilential smell of the brute would sicken a -Chinaman. We caught some extraordinary-looking -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P275"></a>275}</span> -fish on hand lines, including a great golden -carp of over 50 lb. ("dorado" in Spanish). It -took us nearly an hour to land this big fellow, who -proved truly excellent when cooked. -</p> - -<p> -When I first reached the Argentine, travel was -complicated by the fact that each province -issued its own notes, which were only current within -the province itself except at a heavy discount. -The value of the dollar fluctuated enormously in -the different provinces. In Buenos Ayres the -dollar was depreciated to four cents, or twopence, -and was treated as such, the ordinary tram fare -being one depreciated dollar. In other provinces -the dollar stood as high as three shillings. In -passing from one province to another all paper money -had to be changed, and this entailed the most intricate -calculations. It is unnecessary to add that the -stranger was fleeced quite mercilessly. The currency -has since been placed on a more rational basis. -National notes, issued against a gold reserve, have -superseded the provincial currency, and pass from -one end of the Republic to the other. -</p> - -<p> -Upon returning to Buenos Ayres, my blue-satin -bedroom looked strangely artificial and effeminate, -after sleeping on the ground under the stars -for so long. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap09"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P276"></a>276}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER IX -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Paraguay—Journey up the river—A primitive Capital—Dick -the Australian—His polychrome garb—A Paraguayan Race -Meeting—Beautiful figures of native women—The "Falcon" -adventurers—a quaint railway—Patiño Cué—An -extraordinary household—The capable Australian boy—Wild -life in the swamps—"Bushed"—A literary evening—A -railway record—The Tigre midnight swims—Canada—Maddening -flies—A grand salmon river—The Canadian -backwoods—Skunks and bears—Different views as to -industrial progress. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -As negotiations had commenced in the "'eighties" -for a new Treaty, including an Extradition clause, -between the British and Paraguayan Governments, -several minor points connected with it required -clearing up. -</p> - -<p> -I accordingly went up the river to Asuncion, -the Paraguayan capital, five days distant from -Buenos Ayres by steamer. A short account of -that primitive little inland Republic in the days -before it was linked up with Argentina by railway -may prove of interest, for it was unlike anything -else, with its stately two hundred-year-old relics -of the old Spanish civilisation mixed up with the -roughest of modern makeshifts. The vast majority -of the people were Guaranis, of pure Indian blood -and speech. The little State was so isolated from -the rest of the world that the nineteenth century -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P277"></a>277}</span> -had touched it very lightly. Since its independence -Paraguay had suffered under the rule of a -succession of Dictator Presidents, the worst of whom -was Francisco Lopez, usually known as Tyrant -Lopez. This ignorant savage aspired to be the -Napoleon of South America, and in 1864 declared -war simultaneously on Brazil, Uruguay, and the -Argentine Republic. The war continued till 1870, -when, fortunately, Lopez was killed, but the -population of Paraguay had diminished from one and -a quarter million to four hundred thousand people, -nearly all the males being killed. In my time there -were seven women to every male of the population. -</p> - -<p> -The journey up the mighty Paraná is very -uninteresting, for these huge rivers are too broad for -the details on either shore to be seen clearly. After -the steamer had turned up the Paraguay river on -the verge of the tropics, it became less monotonous. -The last Argentine town is Formosa, a little place -of thatched shanties clustered under groves of -palms. We arrived there at night, and remained -three hours. I shall never forget the eerie, -uncanny effect of seeing for the first time Paraguayan -women, with a white petticoat, and a white sheet -over their heads as their sole garments, flitting -noiselessly along on bare feet under the palms in -the brilliant moonlight. They looked like hooded -silent ghosts, and reminded me irresistibly of the -fourth act of "Robert le Diable," when the ghosts -of the nuns arise out of their cloister graves at -Bertram's command. They did not though as -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P278"></a>278}</span> -in the opera, break into a glittering ballet. -</p> - -<p> -On board the steamer there was a young -globe-trotting Australian. He was a nice, cheery lad, -and, like most Australians, absolutely natural and -unaffected. As he spoke no Spanish, he was rather -at a loose end, and we agreed to foregather. -</p> - -<p> -Asuncion was really a curiosity in the way of -capitals. Lopez the Tyrant suffered from -megalomania, as others rulers have done since his day. -He began to construct many imposing buildings, -but finished none of them. He had built a huge -palace on the model of the Tuileries on a bluff -over the river. It looked very imposing, but had -no roof and no inside. He had also begun a great -mausoleum for members of the Lopez family, but -that again had only a façade, and was already -crumbling to ruin. The rest of the town -consisted principally of mud and bamboo shanties, -thatched with palm. The streets were unpaved, -and in the main street a strong spring gushed up. -Everyone rode; there was but one wheeled vehicle -in Asuncion, and that was only used for weddings -and funerals. The inhabitants spoke of their one -carriage as we should speak of something -absolutely unique of its kind, say the statue of the -Venus de Milo, or of some rare curiosity, such as -a great auk's egg, or a twopenny blue Mauritius -postage stamp, or a real live specimen of the dodo. -</p> - -<p> -Nothing could be rougher than the accommodation -Howard, the young Australian, and I found at the -hotel. We were shown into a very dirty brick-paved -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P279"></a>279}</span> -room containing eight beds. We washed unabashed -at the fountain in the <i>patio</i>, as there were -no other facilities for ablutions at all, and the -bare-footed, shirtless waiter addressed us each by our -Christian names <i>tout court</i>, at once, omitting the -customary "Don." The Spanish forms of Christian -names are more melodious than ours, and Howard -failed to recognize his homely name of "Dick" in -"Ricardo." -</p> - -<p> -As South American men become moustached and -bearded very early in life, I think that our -clean-shaved faces, to which they were not accustomed, -led the people to imagine us both much younger -than we really were, for I was then twenty-seven, -and the long-legged Dick was twenty-one. Never -have I known anyone laugh so much as that -light-hearted Australian boy. He was such a happy, -merry, careless creature, brimful of sheer joy at -being alive, and if he had never cultivated his brains -much, he atoned for it by being able to do anything -he liked with his hands and feet. He could mend -and repair anything, from a gun to a fence; he -could cook, and use a needle and thread as -skilfully as he could a stock-whip. I took a great -liking to this lean, sun-browned, pleasant-faced -lad with the merry laugh and the perfectly natural -manner; we got on together as though we had -known each other all our lives, in fact we were -addressing one another by our Christian names on the -third day of our acquaintance. -</p> - -<p> -Dick was a most ardent cricketer, and his -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P280"></a>280}</span> -baggage seemed to consist principally of a large and -varied assortment of blazers of various Australian -athletic clubs. He insisted on wearing one of -these, a quiet little affair of mauve, blue, and pink -stripes, and our first stroll through Asuncion -became a sort of triumphal progress. The -inhabitants flocked out of their houses, loud in their -admiration of the "Gringo's" (all foreigners are -"Gringos" in South America) tasteful raiment. -So much so that I began to grow jealous, and -returning to the hotel, I borrowed another of -Howard's blazers (if my memory serves me right, that -of the "Wonga-Wonga Wallabies"), an artistic -little garment of magenta, orange, and green stripes. -We then sauntered about Asuncion, arm-in-arm, to -the delirious joy of the populace. We soon had -half the town at our heels, enthusiastic over these -walking rainbows from the mysterious lands outside -Paraguay. These people were as inquisitive -as children, and plied us with perpetual questions. -Since Howard could not speak Spanish, all the -burden of conversation fell on me. As I occupied -an official position, albeit a modest one, I thought -it best to sink my identity, and became temporarily -a citizen of the United States, Mr. Dwight P. Curtis, -of Hicksville, Pa., and I gave my hearers -the most glowing and rose-coloured accounts of -the enterprise and nascent industries of this -progressive but, I fear, wholly imaginary spot. I can -only trust that no Paraguayan left his native land -to seek his fortune in Hicksville, Pa., for he might -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P281"></a>281}</span> -have had to search the State of Pennsylvania for -some time before finding it. -</p> - -<p> -I have already recounted, earlier in these -reminiscences, how the Paraguayan Minister for Foreign -Affairs received me, and that his Excellency on that -occasion dispensed not only with shoes and stockings, -but with a shirt as well. He was, however, -like most people in Spanish-speaking lands, -courtesy itself. -</p> - -<p> -Dick Howard having heard that there was some -races in a country town six miles away, was, like -a true Australian, wild to go to them. Encouraged -by our phenomenal success of the previous day, -we arrayed ourselves in two new Australian -blazers, and rode out to the races, Howard imploring -me all the way to use my influence to let him -have a mount there. -</p> - -<p> -The races were very peculiar. The course was -short, only about three furlongs, and perfectly -straight. Only two horses ran at once, so the -races were virtually a succession of "heats," but -the excitement and betting were tremendous. The -jockeys were little Indian boys, and their -"colours" consisted of red, blue, or green bathing -drawers. Otherwise they were stark naked, and, -of course, bare-legged. The jockey's principal -preoccupation seemed to be either to kick the -opposing jockey in the face, or to crack him over -the head with the heavy butts of their raw-hide -whips. Howard still wanted to ride. I pointed out -to him the impossibility of exhibiting to the public -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P282"></a>282}</span> -his six feet of lean young Australian in nothing -but a pair of green bathing drawers. He answered -that if he could only get a mount he would be quite -willing to dispense with the drawers even. Howard -also had a few remarks to offer about the Melbourne -Cup, and Flemington Racecourse, and was not -wholly complimentary to this Paraguayan country -meeting. The ladies present were nearly all -bare-foot, and clad in the invariable white petticoat -and sheet. It was not in the least like the Royal -enclosure at Ascot, yet they had far more on, -and appeared more becomingly dressed than many -of the ladies parading in that sacrosanct spot in -this year of grace 1919. Every single woman, and -every child, even infants of the tenderest age, had -a green Paraguayan cigar in their mouths. -</p> - -<p> -These Paraguayan women were as beautifully -built as classical statues; with exquisitely moulded -little hands and feet. Their "attaches," as the -French term the wrist and ankles, were equally -delicately formed. They were "tea with plenty -of milk in it" colour, and though their faces -were not pretty, they moved with such graceful -dignity that the general impression they left was -a very pleasing one. -</p> - -<p> -Our blazers aroused rapturous enthusiasm. I -am sure that the members of the "St. Kilda -Wanderers" would have forgiven me for masquerading -in their colours, could they have witnessed the -terrific success I achieved in my tasteful, if brilliant, -borrowed plumage. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P283"></a>283}</span> -</p> - -<p> -Asuncion pleased me. This quaint little capital, -stranded in its backwater in the very heart of the -South American Continent, was so remote from -all the interests and movements of the modern -world. The big three-hundred-year cathedral bore -the unmistakable dignified stamp of the old -Spanish "Conquistadores." It contained an altar-piece -of solid silver reaching from floor to roof. How -Lopez must have longed to melt that altar-piece -down for his own use! Round the cathedral were -some old houses with verandahs supported on palm -trunks, beautifully carved in native patterns by -Indians under the direction of the Jesuits. The -Jesuits had also originally introduced the orange -tree into Paraguay, where it had run wild all over -the country, producing delicious fruit, which for -some reason was often green, instead of being of -the familiar golden colour. -</p> - -<p> -Everyone envies what they do not possess. On -the Continent cafés are sometimes decorated with -pictures of palms and luxuriant tropical vegetation, -in order to give people of the frozen North -an illusion of warmth. -</p> - -<p> -In steaming Asuncion, on the other hand, the -fashionable café was named, "The North Pole." Here -an imaginative Italian artist with a deficient -sense of perspective and curious ideas of colour -had decorated the walls with pictures of icebergs, -snow, and Polar bears, thus affording the inhabitants -of this stew-pan of a town a delicious sense -of arctic coolness. The "North Pole" was the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P284"></a>284}</span> -only place in Paraguay where ice and iced drinks -were to be procured. -</p> - -<p> -Being the height of the summer, the heat was -almost unbearable, and bathing in the river was -risky on account of those hateful biting-fish. There -was a spot two miles away, however, where a -stream had been brought to the edge of the cliff -overhanging the river, down which it dropped in -a feathery cascade, forming a large pool below it. -Howard and I rode out every morning there to -bathe and luxuriate in the cool water. The river -made a great bend here, forming a bay half a -mile wide. This bay was literally choked with -<i>Victoria regia</i>, the giant water-lily, with leaves as -big as tea-trays, and great pink flowers the size -of cabbages. The lilies were in full bloom then, -quite half a mile of them, and they were really a -splendid sight. I seem somehow in this description -of the <i>Victoria regia</i> to have been plagiarising -the immortal Mrs. O'Dowd, of "Vanity Fair," in -her account of the glories of the hot-houses at her -"fawther's" seat of Glenmalony. -</p> - -<p> -Few people now remember a fascinating book -of the "'eighties," "The Cruise of the Falcon," -recounting how six amateurs sailed a twenty-ton -yacht from Southampton to Asuncion in Paraguay. -Three of her crew got so bitten with Paraguay -that they determined to remain there. We met -one of these adventurers by chance in Asuncion, -Captain Jardine, late of the P. and O. service, -an elderly man. He invited us to visit them at -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P285"></a>285}</span> -Patiño Cué, the place where they had settled down, -some twenty-five miles from the capital, though he -warned us that we should find things extremely rough -there, and that there was not one single stick of -furniture in the house. He asked us to bring out -our own hammocks and blankets, as well as our guns -and saddles, the saddle being in my time an -invariable item of a traveller's baggage. -</p> - -<p> -Dick and I accordingly bought grass-plaited -hammocks and blankets, and started two days later, -"humping our swags," as the Australian picturesquely -expressed the act of carrying our own -possessions. That colour-loving youth had donned -a different blazer, probably that of the "Coolgardie -Cockatoos." It would have put Joseph's coat of -many colours completely in the shade any day of -the week, and attracted a great deal of flattering -attention. -</p> - -<p> -The ambitious Lopez had insisted on having a -railway in his State, to show how progressive he -was, so a railway was built. It ran sixty miles -from Asuncion to nowhere in particular, and no -one ever wanted to travel by it; still it was -unquestionably a railway. To give a finishing touch -to this, Lopez had constructed a railway station -big enough to accommodate the traffic of Paddington. -It was, of course, not finished, but was quite -large enough for its one train a day. The -completed portion was imposing with columns and -statues, the rest tailed off to nothing. Here, -to our amazement, we found a train composed of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P286"></a>286}</span> -English rolling-stock, with an ancient engine built -in Manchester, and, more wonderful to say, with -an Englishman as engine-driver. The engine not -having been designed for burning wood, the -fire-box was too small, and the driver found it -difficult to keep up steam with wood, as we found out -during our journey. We travelled in a real English -first-class carriage of immense antiquity, blue -cloth and all. So decrepit was it that when the -speed of the train exceeded five miles an hour -(which was but seldom) the roof and sides parted -company, and gaped inches apart. We seldom got -up the gradients at the first or second try, but of -course allowances must be made for a Paraguayan -railway. Lopez had built Patiño Cué, for which -we were bound, as a country-house for himself. -He had not, of course, finished it, but had insisted -on his new railway running within a quarter of a -mile of his house, which we found very convenient. -</p> - -<p> -I could never have imagined such a curious -establishment as the one at Patiño Cué. The large -stone house, for which Jardine paid the huge rent -of £5 per annum, was tumbling to ruin. Three -rooms only were fairly water-tight, but these had -gaping holes in their roofs and sides, and the window -frames had long since been removed. The fittings -consisted of a few enamelled iron plates and mugs, -and of one tin basin. Packing cases served as -seats and tables, and hammocks were slung on -hooks. Captain Jardine did all the cooking and -ran the establishment; his two companions (Howard -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P287"></a>287}</span> -and I, for convenience's sake, simply termed -them "the wasters") lay smoking in their -hammocks all day, and did nothing whatever. I may -add that "the wasters" supplied the whole -financial backing. Jardine wore native dress, with -bare legs and sandals, a poncho round his waist, -and another over his shoulders. A poncho is -merely a fringed brown blanket with hole cut in it for -the head to pass through. With his long grey -beard streaming over his flowing garments, Jardine -looked like a neutral-tinted saint in a stained-glass -window. It must be a matter for congratulation -that, owing to the very circumstances of the -case, saints in stained-glass windows are seldom -called on to take violent exercise, otherwise -their voluminous draperies would infallibly all -fall off at the second step. Jardine was a -highly educated and an interesting man, with -a love for books on metaphysics and other -abstruse subjects. He carried a large library -about with him, all of which lay in untidy -heaps on the floor. He was unquestionably more -than a little eccentric. The "wasters" did not -count in any way, unless cheques had to be -written. The other members of the establishment -were an old Indian woman who smoked perpetual -cigars, and her grandson, a boy known as Lazarus, -from a physical defect which he shared with a -Biblical personage, on the testimony of the latter's -sisters—you could have run a drag with that boy. -</p> - -<p> -The settlers had started as ranchers; but the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P288"></a>288}</span> -"wasters" had allowed the cattle to break loose -and scatter all over the country. They had been -too lazy to collect them, or to repair the broken -fences, so just lay in their hammocks and smoked. -There were some fifty acres of orange groves -behind the house. The energetic Jardine had -fenced these in, and, having bought a number of -pigs, turned pork butcher. There was an abundance -of fallen fruit for these pigs to fatten on, -and Jardine had built a smoke-house, where he -cured his orange-fed pork, and smoked it with -lemon wood. His bacon and hams were -super-excellent, and fetched good prices in Asuncion, -where they were establishing quite a reputation. -</p> - -<p> -Meanwhile, the "wasters" lay in their hammocks -in the verandah and smoked. Jardine told -me that one of them had not undressed or changed -his clothes for six weeks, as it was far too much -trouble. Judging from his appearance, he had -not made use of soap and water either during that -period. -</p> - -<p> -Dick Howard proved a real "handy man." In -two days this lengthy, lean, sunburnt youth had -rounded up and driven home the scattered cattle, -and then set to work to mend and repair all the -broken fences. He caught the horses daily, and -milked the cows, an art I was never able myself -to acquire, and made tea for himself in a "billy." -</p> - -<p> -Patiño Cué was a wonderful site for a house. -It stood high up on rolling open ground, -surrounded by intensely green wooded knolls. The -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P289"></a>289}</span> -virgin tropical forest extended almost up to the -dilapidated building on one side, whilst in front -of it the ground fell away to a great lake, three -miles away. A long range of green hills rose the -other side of the water, and everywhere clear little -brooks gurgled down to the lake. -</p> - -<p> -I liked the place, in spite of its intense heat, and -stayed there over a fortnight, helping with the -cattle, and making myself as useful as I could in -repairing what the "wasters" had allowed to go -to ruin. They reposed meanwhile in their hammocks. -</p> - -<p> -It was very pretty country, and had the -immense advantage of being free from mosquitoes. -As there are disadvantages everywhere, to make -up for this it crawled with snakes. -</p> - -<p> -Jardine's culinary operations were simplicity -itself. He had some immense earthen jars four -feet high, own brothers to those seen on the stage -in "Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves" at pantomime -time. These must have been the identical -jars in which the Forty Thieves concealed -themselves, to be smothered with boiling oil by the -crafty Morgiana. By the way, I never could -understand until I had seen fields of growing -sesame in India why Ali Baba's brother should have -mistaken the talisman words "Open Sesame" for -"Open Barley." The two grains are very similar -in appearance whilst growing, which explains it. -</p> - -<p> -Jardine placed a layer of beef at the bottom of -his jar. On that he put a layer of mandioca (the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P290"></a>290}</span> -root from which tapioca is prepared), another layer -of his own bacon, and a stratum of green -vegetables. Then more beef, and so on till the jar -was half full. In went a handful of salt, two -handfuls of red peppers, and two gallons of water, -and then a wood fire was built round the pot, which -simmered away day and night till all its contents -were eaten. The old Indian woman baked delicious -bread from the root of the mandioca mixed with -milk and cheese, and that constituted our entire -dietary. There were no fixed meals. Should -you require food, you took a hunch of mandioca -bread and a tin dipper, and went to the big -earthen jar simmering amongst its embers in the yard. -Should you wish for soup, you put the dipper in at -the top; if you preferred stew, you pushed it to the -bottom. Nothing could be simpler. As a rough -and ready way of feeding a household it had its -advantages, though there was unquestionably a -certain element of monotony about it. -</p> - -<p> -As a variation from the eternal beef and -mandioca, Jardine begged Dick and myself to shoot -him as many snipe as possible, in the swamps near -the big lake. Those swamps were most attractive, -and were simply alive with snipe and every sort -of living creature. Dick was an excellent shot, -and we got from five to fifteen couple of snipe daily. -The tree-crowned hillocks in the swamp were the -haunts of macaws, great gaudy, screaming, winged -rainbows of green and scarlet, and orange and blue, -like some of Dick's blazers endowed with feathers -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P291"></a>291}</span> -and motion. We had neither of us ever seen wild -macaws before, and I am afraid that we shot a good -many for the sheer pleasure of examining these -garish parrots at close quarters, though they are -quite uneatable. I shall carry all my life marks -on my left hand where a macaw bit me to the -bone. There were great brilliant-plumaged -toucans too, droll freaks of nature, with huge horny -bills nearly as large as their bodies, given them -to crack the nuts on which they feed. They flashed -swiftly pink through the air, but we never -succeeded in getting one. Then there were coypus, -the great web-footed South American water-rat, -called "nutria" in Spanish, and much prized for -his fur. That marsh was one of the most interesting -places I have ever been in. The old Indian woman -warned us that we should both infallibly die of -fever were we to go into the swamps at nightfall, -but though Dick and I were there every evening -for a fortnight, up to our middles in water, we -neither of us took the smallest harm, probably -owing to the temporary absence of mosquitoes. The -teeming hidden wild-life of the place appealed to -us both irresistibly. The water-hog, or capincho, -is a quaint beast, peculiar to South America. They -are just like gigantic varnished glossy-black guinea -pigs, with the most idiotically stupid expression on -their faces. They are quite defenceless, and are the -constant prey of alligators and jaguars. Consequently -they are very timid. These creatures live -in the water all day, but come out in the evenings -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P292"></a>292}</span> -to feed on the reeds and water-herbage. By -concealing ourselves amongst the reeds, and keeping -perfectly still, we were able to see these uncouth, -shy things emerging from their day hiding-places -and begin browsing on the marsh plants. To see -a very wary animal at close quarters, knowing -that he is unconscious of your presence, is perfectly -fascinating. We never attempted to shoot or hurt -these capinchos; the pleasure of seeing the clumsy -gambols of one of the most timid animals living, -in its fancied security, was quite enough. The -capincho if caught very young makes a delightful -pet, for he becomes quite tame, and, being an -affectionate animal, trots everywhere after his master, -with a sort of idiotic simper on his face. -</p> - -<p> -One evening, on our return from the marsh, we -were ill-advised enough to attempt a short cut home -through the forest. The swift tropical night fell -as we entered the forest, and in half an hour we -were hopelessly lost, "fairly bushed," as Dick put -it. There is a feeling of complete and utter -helplessness in finding oneself on a pitch-dark night in -a virgin tropical forest that is difficult to express -in words. The impenetrable tangles of jungle; the -great lianes hanging from the trees, which trip you -up at every step; the masses of thorny and spiky -things that hold you prisoner; and, as regards myself -personally, the knowledge that the forest was full -of snakes, all make one realise that electric-lighted -Piccadilly has its distinct advantages. Dick had the -true Australian's indifference to snakes. He never -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P293"></a>293}</span> -could understand my openly-avowed terror of these -evil, death-dealing creatures, nor could he explain -to himself the physical repugnance I have to these -loathsome reptiles. This instinctive horror of snakes -is, I think, born in some people. It can hardly be -due to atavism, for the episode of the Garden of -Eden is too remote to account of an inherited -antipathy to these gliding, crawling abominations. We -settled that we should have to sleep in the forest -till daylight came, though, dripping wet as we -both were from the swamp, it was a fairly direct -invitation to malarial fever. The resourceful Dick -got an inspiration, and dragging his interminable -length (he was like Euclid's definition of a straight -line) up a high tree, he took a good look at the -familiar stars of his own Southern hemisphere. -Getting his bearings from these, he also got our direction, -and after a little more tree-climbing we reached -our dilapidated temporary home in safety. I fear -that I shall never really conquer my dislike to -snakes, sharks, and earthquakes. -</p> - -<p> -Jardine was a great and an omnivorous reader. -Dick too was very fond of reading. Like the hero -of "Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour" he carried his -own library with him. As in Mr. Sponge's case, -it consisted of one book only, but in the place of -being "Mogg's Cab Fares," it was a guide to the -Australian Turf, a sort of Southern Cross "Ruff's -Guide," with a number of pedigrees of Australian -horses thrown in. Dick's great intellectual amusement -was learning these pedigrees by heart. I used -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P294"></a>294}</span> -to hear them for him, and, having a naturally -retentive memory, could in the "'eighties" have passed -a very creditable examination in the pedigrees of the -luminaries of the Australian Turf. -</p> - -<p> -Our evenings at Patiño Cué would have amused -a spectator, had there been one. In the tumble-down, -untidy apology for a room, Jardine, seated -on a packing-case under the one wall light, was -immersed in his favourite Herbert Spencer; looking, -in his flowing ponchos, long grey beard, and -bare legs, like a bespectacled apostle. He always -seemed to me to require an eagle, or a lion or -some other apostolic adjunct, in order to look -complete. I, on another packing-case, was -chuckling loudly over "Monsieur et Madame Cardinal," -though Paris seemed remote from Paraguay. Dick, -pulling at a green cigar, a far-off look in his young -eyes, was improving his mind by learning some -further pedigrees of Australian horses, at full length -on the floor, where he found more room for his -thin, endless legs; whilst the two "wasters" dozed -placidly in their hammocks on the verandah. The -"wasters," I should imagine, attended church but -seldom. Otherwise they ought to have ejaculated -"We have left undone those things which we ought -to have done" with immense fervour, for they -never did anything at all. -</p> - -<p> -"Lotos-eaters" might be a more poetic name than -"wasters," for if ever there was a land "in which -it seemed always afternoon," that land is Paraguay. -Could one conceive of the "wasters" displaying -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P295"></a>295}</span> -such unwonted energy, it is possible that— -</p> - -<p class="poem"> - "And all at once they sang 'Our island home<br /> - Is far beyond the wave; we will no longer roam'."<br /> -</p> - -<p class="noindent"> -They had eaten of the Lotos-fruit abundantly, -and in the golden sunshine of Paraguay, and amidst -its waving green palms, they only wished— -</p> - -<p class="poem"> - "In the hollow Lotos-land to live and lie reclined."<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -I should perhaps add that "cafia," or sugar-cane -spirit, is distilled in large quantities in Paraguay, -and that one at least of the Lotos-eaters took a -marked interest in this national product. -</p> - -<p> -There were some beautiful nooks in the forest, -more especially one deep blue rocky pool into -which a foaming cascade pattered through a thick -encircling fringe of wild orange trees. This little -hollow was brimful of loveliness, with the golden -balls of the fruit, and the brilliant purple tangles -of some unknown creeper reflected in the blue pool. -Dick and I spent hours there swimming, and basking -<i>puris naturalibus</i> on the rocks, until the whole -place was spoilt for me by a rustling in the grass, -as a hateful ochre-coloured creature wriggled away -in sinuous coils from my bare feet. -</p> - -<p> -I accompanied Jardine once or twice to a little -village some five miles away, where he got the few -household stores he required. This tiny village was -a piece of seventeenth-century Spain, dumped bodily -down amid the riotous greenery of Paraguay. Round -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P296"></a>296}</span> -a tall white church in the florid Jesuit style, a few -beautiful Spanish stone houses clustered, each with -its tangle of tropical garden. There was not one -single modern erection to spoil the place. Here -foaming bowls of chocolate were to be had, and -delicious mandioca bread. It was a picturesque, -restful little spot, so utterly unexpected in the very -heart of the South American Continent. I should -like to put on the stage that tall white church tower -cutting into the intense blue of the sky above, with -the vivid green of the feathery palms reaching to -its belfry, and the time-worn houses round it -peeping out from thickets of scarlet poinsettias and -hibiscus flowers. It would make a lovely setting -for "Cavalleria Rusticana," for instance. -</p> - -<p> -I never regretted my stay at Patiño Cué. It -gave one a glimpse of life brought down to conditions -of bed-rock simplicity, and of types of character -I had never come across before. -</p> - -<p> -We travelled back to Asuncion on the engine of -the train; I seated in front on the cow-catcher, -Dick, his coat off and his shirt-sleeves rolled back, -on the footplate, officiating as amateur fireman. -</p> - -<p> -This vigorous young Antipodean hurled logs -into the fire-box of the venerable "Vesuvius" as -fast as though he were pitching in balls when -practising his bowling at the nets, with the result -that the crazy old engine attained a speed that -must have fairly amazed her. When we stopped at -stations, "Vesuvius" had developed such a head -of steam that she nearly blew her safety-valve off, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P297"></a>297}</span> -and steam hissed from twenty places in her leaky -joints. One ought never to be astonished at -misplaced affections. I have seen old ladies lavish -a wealth of tenderness on fat, asthmatical, and -wholly repellent pugs, so I ought not to have been -surprised at the immense pride the English driver -took in his antique engine. I am bound to say -that he kept her beautifully cleaned and burnished. -His face beamed at her present performance, and -he assured me that with a little coaxing he could -knock sixty miles an hour out of "Vesuvius." I -fear that this statement "werged on the poetical," -as Mr. Weller senior remarked on another occasion. -I should much like to have known this man's -history, and to have learnt how he had drifted into -driving an engine of this futile, forlorn little -Paraguayan railway. I suspect, from certain expressions -he used, that he was a deserter from the Royal -Navy, probably an ex-naval stoker. As Dick had -ridden ten miles that morning to say good-bye to -a lady, to whom he imagined himself devotedly -attached, he was still very smart in white -polo-breeches, brown butcher-boots and spurs, an -unusual garb for a railway fireman. For the first -time in the memory of the oldest living inhabitant, -the train reached Asuncion an hour before her time. -</p> - -<p> -The river steamers' cargo in their downstream -trip consisted of cigars, "Yerba mate," and -oranges. These last were shipped in bulk, and I -should like a clever artist to have drawn our steamer, -with tons and tons of fruit, golden, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P298"></a>298}</span> -lemon-yellow, and green, piled on her decks. It made a -glowing bit of colour. The oranges were the only things -in that steamer that smelt pleasantly. -</p> - -<p> -I can never understand why "Yerba mate," or -Paraguayan tea, has never become popular in -England. It is prepared from the leaves of the -ilex, and is strongly aromatic and very stimulating. -I am myself exceedingly fond of it. Its -lack of popularity may be due to the fact that it -cannot be drunk in a cup, but must be sucked -from a gourd through a perforated tube. It can -(like most other things) be bought in London, if -you know where to go to. -</p> - -<p> -At Buenos Ayres I was quite sorry to part with -the laughing, lanky Australian lad who had been -such a pleasant travelling companion, and who -seemed able to do anything he liked with his arms -and legs. I expect that he could have done most -things with his brains too, had he ever given -them a chance. Howard's great merit was that he -took things as they came, and never grumbled -at the discomforts and minor hardships one must -expect in a primitive country like Paraguay. Our -tastes as regards wild things (with the possible -exception of snakes) rather seemed to coincide, and, -neither of us being town-bred, we did not object -to rather elementary conditions. -</p> - -<p> -I will own that I was immensely gratified -at receiving an overseas letter some eight years -later from Dick, telling me that he was -married and had a little daughter, and asking -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P299"></a>299}</span> -me to stand godfather for his first child. -</p> - -<p> -My blue satin bedroom looked more ridiculously -incongruous than ever after the conditions to -which I had been used at Patiño Cué. -</p> - -<p> -The River Plate is over twenty miles broad at -Buenos Ayres, and it is not easy to realise that this -great expansive is all fresh water. The "Great Silver -River" is, however, very shallow, except in mid-channel. -Some twenty-five miles from the city it forms on -its southern bank a great archipelago of wooded -islands interspersed with hundreds of winding -channels, some of them deep enough to carry ocean-going -steamers. This is known as the Tigre, and its shady -tree-lined waterways are a great resort during the -sweltering heat of an Argentine summer. It is the -most ideal place for boating, and boasts a very -flourishing English Rowing Club, with a large fleet of -light Thames-built boats. Here during the summer -months I took the roughest of rough bungalows, -with two English friends. The three-roomed shanty -was raised on high piles, out of reach of floods, and -looked exactly like the fishermen's houses one sees -lining the rivers in native villages in the Malay -States. During the intense heat of January the -great delight of life at the Tigre was the midnight -swim in the river before turning in. The Tigre is -too far south for the alligators, biting-fish, electric -rays (I allude to fish; not to beams of light), or -other water-pests which Nature has lavished on the -tropics in order to counteract their irresistible -charm—and to prevent the whole world from -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P300"></a>300}</span> -settling down there. The water of the Tigre was so -warm that one could remain in it over an hour. -One mental picture I am always able to conjure -up, and I can at will imagine myself at midnight -paddling lazily down-stream on my back through -the milk-warm water, in the scented dusk, looking -up at the pattern formed by the leaves of the -overhanging trees against the night sky; a pattern -of black lace-work against the polished silver of -the Southern moonlight, whilst the water lapped -gently against the banks, and an immense joy at -being alive filled one's heart. -</p> - -<p> -I went straight from Buenos Ayres to Canada -on a tramp steamer, and a month after leaving -the Plate found myself in the backwoods of the -Province of Quebec, on a short but very famous -river running into the Bay of Chaleurs, probably -the finest salmon river in the world, and I was -fortunate enough to hook and to land a 28 lb. salmon -before I had been there one hour. No greater -contrast in surroundings can be imagined. In the -place of the dead-flat, treeless levels of Southern -Argentina, there were dense woods of spruce, cedar, -and var, climbing the hills as far as the eye could -see. Instead of the superficially courteous -Argentine gaucho, with his air of half-concealed contempt -for the "Gringo," and the ever-ready knife, prepared -to leap from his waist-belt at the slightest -provocation, there were the blunt, outspoken, hearty -Canadian canoe-men, all of them lumbermen during -the winter months. The fishing was ideal, and the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P301"></a>301}</span> -fish ran uniformly large and fought like Trojans -in the heavy water, but, unfortunately, every single -winged insect on the North American Continent -had arranged for a summer holiday on this same -river at the same time. There they all were in -their myriads; black-flies, sand-flies, and mosquitoes, -all enjoying themselves tremendously. By day -one was devoured by black-flies, who drew blood -every time they bit. At nightfall the black-flies -very considerately retired to rest, and the little -sand-flies took their place. The mosquitoes took no -rest whatever. These rollicking insects were always -ready to turn night into day, or day into night, -indiscriminately, provided there were some -succulent humans to feed on. A net will baffle the -mosquito, but for the sand-flies the only effective -remedy was a "smudge" burning in an iron pail. A -"smudge" is a fire of damp fir bark, which smoulders -but does not blaze. It also emits huge volumes -of smoke. We dined every night in an atmosphere -denser than a thick London fog, and the coughing -was such that a chance visitor would have imagined -that he had strayed into a sanatorium for -tuberculosis. -</p> - -<p> -Things are done expeditiously in Canada. The -ground had been cleared, the wooden house in -which we lived erected, and the rough track through -the forest made, all in eight weeks. -</p> - -<p> -No one who has not tried it can have any idea -of the intense cold of the water in these short -Canadian rivers. Their course is so short, and they -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P302"></a>302}</span> -are so overhung with fir trees, that the fierce rays -of a Canadian summer sun hardly touch them, so -the water remains about ten degrees above freezing -point. It would have been impossible to swim our -river. Even a short dip of half a minute left one -with gasping breath and chattering teeth. -</p> - -<p> -I was surprised to find, too, that a Canadian forest -is far more impenetrable than a tropical one. Here, -the fallen trees and decay of countless centuries -have formed a thick crust some two or three feet -above the real soil. This moss-grown crust yields -to the weight of a man and lets him through, so -walking becomes infinitely difficult, and practically -impossible. To extricate yourself at every step -from three feet of decaying rubbish is very exhausting. -In the tropics, that great forcing-house, this -decaying vegetable matter would have given life -to new and exuberant growths; but not so in -Canada, frost-bound for four months of the twelve. -Two-foot-wide tracks had been cut through the -forest along the river, and the trees there were -"blazed" (<i>i.e.</i>, notched, so as to show up white -where the bark had been hacked off), to indicate -the direction of the trails; otherwise it would have -been impossible to make one's way through the -<i>débris</i> of a thousand years for more than a few -yards. -</p> - -<p> -I never saw such a wealth of wild fruit as on -the banks of this Canadian stream. Wild strawberries -and raspberries grew in such profusion that -a bucketful of each could be filled in half an hour. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P303"></a>303}</span> -</p> - -<p> -There was plenty of animal life too. A certain -pretty little black and white striped beast was -quite disagreeably common. This attractive -cat-like little creature was armed with stupendous -offensive powers, as all who have experienced a -skunk's unspeakably disgusting odour will acknowledge. -Unless molested, they did not make use of -the terrible possibilities they had at their command. -There were also plenty of wandering black bears. -These animals live for choice on grain and berries, -and are not hostile to man without provocation, but -they have enormous strength, and it is a good -working rule to remember that it is unwise ever to vex -a bear unnecessarily, even a mild-tempered black -bear. -</p> - -<p> -Our tumbling, roaring Canadian river cutting -its way through rounded, densely-wooded hills was -wonderfully pretty, and one could not but marvel -at the infinitely varied beauty with which Providence -has clothed this world of ours, wherever man -has not defaced Nature's perfect craftsmanship. -</p> - -<p> -The point of view of the country-bred differs -widely from that of the town dweller in this respect. -</p> - -<p> -Here is a splendid waterfall, churning itself into -whirling cataracts of foam down the face of a -jagged cliff. The townsman cries, "What -tremendous power is running to waste here! Let us -harness it quickly. We will divert the falls into -hideous water-pipes, and bring them to our -turbines. We will build a power-house cheaply of -corrugated iron, and in time we shall so develop -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P304"></a>304}</span> -this sleepy countryside that no one will recognise -it." -</p> - -<p> -Here is a great forest; a joy to the eyes. "The -price of timber is rising; let us quickly raze it to -the ground." -</p> - -<p> -"Our expert tells us that under this lovely valley -there runs a thick seam of coal. We will sink -shafts, and build blatantly hideous towns and factories, -pollute this clear air with smoke and mephitic -vapours, and then fall down and worship the great -god Progress. We will also pocket fat dividends." -</p> - -<p> -The stupid, unprogressive son of woods and green -fields shudders at such things; the son of asphalte, -stuffy streets, tramways, and arc lights glories in -them. -</p> - -<p> -Like many other things, it all depends on the -point of view. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap10"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P305"></a>305}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER X -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Former colleagues who have risen to -eminence—Kiderlin-Waechter—Aehrenthal—Colonel -Klepsch—The discomfiture -of an inquisitive journalist—Origin of certain Russian -scares—Tokyo—Dulness of Geisha dinners—Japanese -culinary curiosities—"Musical Chairs"—Lack of colour in -Japan—The Tokugawa dynasty—Japanese Gardens—The -transplanted suburban Embassy house—Cherry-blossom—Japanese -Politeness—An unfortunate incident in Rome—Eastern -courtesy—The country in Japan—An Imperial -duck catching party—An up-to-date Tokyo house—A Shinto -Temple—Linguistic difficulties at a dinner-party—The -economical colleague—Japan defaced by advertisements. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -Petrograd was the only capital at which I was -stationed in which there was a diplomatic <i>table -d'hôte</i>. In one of the French restaurants there, -a room was specially set apart for the diplomats, -and here the "chers collègues" foregathered -nightly, when they had no other engagements. When -a Spaniard and a Dane, a Roumanian and a Dutchman, -a Hungarian and an Englishman dine together -frequently, it becomes a subject of thankfulness that -the universal use of the French language as a means -of international communication has mitigated the -linguistic difficulties brought about by the ambitious -tower-builders of Babel. -</p> - -<p> -Two men whom I met frequently at that diplomatic -<i>table d'hôte</i> rose afterwards to important -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P306"></a>306}</span> -positions in their own countries. They were Baron -von Kiderlin-Waechter, the German, and Baron -von Aehrenthal, the Austrian, both of whom -became Ministers for Foreign Affairs in their -respective countries, and both of whom are now dead. -Kiderlin-Waechter arrived in Petrograd as quite -a young man with the reputation of being Bismarck's -favourite and most promising pupil. Though -a South German by birth, Kiderlin-Waechter had -acquired an overbearing and dictatorial manner of -the most approved Prussian type. When a number -of young men, all of whom are on very friendly -terms with each other, constantly meet, there is -naturally a good deal of fun and chaff passed to and -fro between them. Diplomats are no exception to -this rule, and the fact that the ten young men -talking together may be of ten different nationalities -is no bar to the interchange of humorous personalities, -thanks to the convenient French language, -which lends itself peculiarly to "persiflage." -</p> - -<p> -Germans can never understand the form of friendly -banter which we term chaff, and always resent -it deeply. I have known German diplomats so -offended at a harmless joke that they have threatened -to challenge the author of it to a duel. I -should like to pay a belated tribute to the memory -of the late Count Lovendal, Danish Minister in -Petrograd; peace to his ashes! This kindly, -tactful, middle-aged man must during my time in -Petrograd have stopped at least eight duels. People -in trouble went straight to Count Lovendal, and this -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P307"></a>307}</span> -shrewd, kind-hearted, experienced man of the world -heard them with infinite patience, and then always -gave them sound advice. As years went on, Count -Lovendal came to be a sort of recognised Court -of Honour, to whom all knotty and delicate points -were referred. He, if anyone, should have -"Blessed are the peacemakers" inscribed on his -tomb. At least four of the duels he averted were -due to the inability of Germans to stand chaff. -Kiderlin-Waechter, for instance, was for ever -taking offence at harmless jokes, and threatening -swords and pistols in answer to them. He was a -very big, gross-looking, fair-haired man; with -exactly the type of face that a caricaturist associates -with the average Prussian. -</p> - -<p> -His face was slashed with a generous allowance -of the scars of which Germans are so proud, as -testifying to their prowess in their student-duelling -days. I think that it was the late Sir Wilfrid -Lawson who, referring to the beer-drinking habits -of German students and their passionate love of -face-slashing, described them as living in a -perpetual atmosphere of "scars and swipes." Though -from South Germany, Kiderlin snapped out his -words with true "Preussische Grobheit" in speaking -German. Fortunately, it is impossible to obtain -this bullying effect in the French language. It -does not lend itself to it. I should be guilty of -exaggeration were I to say that Kiderlin-Waechter -was wildly adored by his foreign colleagues. He -became Minister for Foreign Affairs of the German -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P308"></a>308}</span> -Empire, but made the same mistake as some of his -predecessors, notably Count Herbert Bismarck, -had done. They attributed Bismarck's phenomenal -success to his habitual dictatorial, bullying -manner. This was easily copied; they forgot the genius -behind the bully, which could not be copied, and -did not realise that Bismarck's tremendous brain -had not fallen to their portion. Kiderlin-Waechter's -tenure of office was a short one; he died very -suddenly in 1912. He was a violent Anglophobe. -</p> - -<p> -Baron von Aehrenthal was a very different stamp -of man. He was of Semitic origin, and in appearance -was a good-looking, tall, slim, dark young -fellow with very pleasing manners. Some people -indeed thought his manners too pleasant, and termed -them subservient. I knew Aehrenthal very well -indeed, and liked him, but I never suspected that -under that very quiet exterior there lay the most -intense personal ambition. He became -Austro-Hungarian Minister for Foreign Affairs in 1907, -being raised to the rank of Count next year. This -quiet, sleepy-mannered man began embarking on a -recklessly bold foreign policy, and, to the surprise -of those who fancied that they knew him well, -exhibited a most domineering spirit. The old -Emperor Francis Joseph's mental powers were failing, -and it was Aehrenthal who persuaded him to put -an end to the understanding with Russia under -which the <i>status quo</i> in the Balkan States was -guaranteed, and to astonish Europe in 1908 by -proclaiming the annexation of Bosnia and Herzegovina -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P309"></a>309}</span> -to the Austrian Empire. This step, owing to the -seething discontent it aroused in Bosnia, led directly -to the catastrophe of Sarajevo on June 28, 1914, -and plunged Europe into the most terrible war of -history. Aehrenthal, whether intentionally or not, -played directly into the hands of the Pan-Germanic -party, and succeeded in tying his own country, a -pliant vassal, to the chariot-wheels of Berlin. It -was Aehrenthal who brought the immemorially old -Hapsburg Monarchy crashing to the ground and by -his foreign policy caused the proud Austrian -Empire to collapse like a house of cards. He did not -live to see the final results of his work, for he died -in 1912. -</p> - -<p> -Colonel Klepsch, the Austro-Hungarian Military -Attaché at Petrograd, another <i>habitué</i> of the -diplomatic <i>table d'hôte</i>, was a most remarkable man. -He knew more of the real state of affairs in -Russia, and of the inner workings and intentions of the -Russian Government, than any other foreigner -in the country, <i>and his information was invariably -correct</i>. Nearly all the foreign Ambassadors -consulted Colonel Klepsch as to the probable trend -of affairs in Russia, and at times he called on them -and volunteered pieces of information. It was -well known that his source of intelligence was a -feminine one, and experience had proved that it -was always to be relied upon. To this day I do -not know whether this mysterious, taciturn man -was at times used as a convenient mouthpiece by -the Russian Government, at the instigation of a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P310"></a>310}</span> -certain person to whom he was devotedly attached; -whether he acted on instructions from his own -Ambassador, or if he took the steps he did on his own -initiative. This tall, red-haired, silent man, with his -uncanny knowledge of every detail of what was -happening in the country, will always remain an -enigma to me. -</p> - -<p> -I mentioned earlier in these reminiscences that -Lord Dufferin on one occasion accomplished the -difficult feat of turning an English newspaper -correspondent out of his house with the most -charming courtesy. -</p> - -<p> -After an interval of nearly forty years, I can -without indiscretion say how this came about. The -person in question, whom we will call Mr. Q., was -an exceedingly enterprising journalist, the -correspondent of a big London daily. He was also -pretty unscrupulous as to the methods he employed -in gathering information. It is quite obviously -the duty of a newspaper correspondent to collect -information for his paper. It is equally clearly -the duty of those to whom official secrets are -entrusted to prevent their becoming public property; -so here we have conflicting interests. At times it -happens that an "incident" arises between two -Governments apparently trivial in itself, but -capable of being fanned into such a fierce flame by -popular opinion as to make it difficult for either -Government to recede from the position they had -originally taken up. The Press screams loudly -on both sides, and every Government shrinks from -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P311"></a>311}</span> -incurring the unpopularity which a charge of -betraying the national interests would bring upon it. -Experience has shown that in these cases the difficulties -can usually be smoothed down, provided the -whole matter be kept secret, and that neither the -public nor the Press of either of the two countries -concerned have an inkling of the awkward situation -that has arisen. An indiscreet or hysterical -Press can blow a tiny spark into a roaring -conflagration and work up popular feeling to -fever-pitch. It may surprise people to learn that barely -twenty years ago such a situation arose between -our own country and another European Power -(<i>not</i> Germany). Those in charge of the negotiations -on both sides very wisely determined that the -matter should be concealed absolutely from the -public and the Press of both countries, and not one -word about it was allowed to leak out. Otherwise -the situation might have been one of extreme -gravity, for it was again one of those cases where -neither Government could give way without being -accused of pusillanimity. As it was, the matter was -settled amicably in a week, and to this day very -few people know that this very serious difficulty -ever occurred. -</p> - -<p> -Nearly forty years ago, just such a situation -had arisen between us and the Russian Government; -but the Ambassador was convinced that he could -smooth it away provided that the whole thing -were kept secret. -</p> - -<p> -Mr. Q. was a first-rate journalist, and his <i>flair</i> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P312"></a>312}</span> -as a newspaperman told him that <i>something</i> was -wrong. From the Russians he could learn nothing; -they were as close as wax; so Mr. Q. turned his -attention to the Chancery of the British Embassy. -His methods were simple. He gained admission -to the Chancery on some pretext or another, and -then walking about the room, and talking most -volubly, he cast a roving eye over any papers that -might be lying about on the tables. In all -Chanceries a book called the Register is kept in which -every document received or sent out is entered, -with, of course, its date, and a short summary -of its contents. It is a large book, and reposes -on its own high desk. Ours stood in a window -overlooking the Neva. Mr. Q. was not troubled with -false delicacy. Under pretence of admiring the -view over the river, he attempted to throw a rapid -eye over the Register. A colleague of mine, as -a gentle hint, removed the Register from under -Mr. Q.'s very nose, and locked it up in the archive -press. Mr. Q., however, was not thin-skinned. He -came back again and again, till the man became a -positive nuisance. We always cleared away every -paper before he was allowed admittance. I was -only twenty-two or twenty-three then, and I -devised a strictly private scheme of my own for -Mr. Q.'s discomfiture. All despatches received from -the Foreign Office in those days were kept folded -in packets of ten, with a docket on each, giving -a summary of its contents. I prepared two -despatches for Mr. Q.'s private eye and, after much -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P313"></a>313}</span> -cogitation, settled that they should be about -Afghanistan, which did not happen to be the particular -point in dispute between the two Governments -at that time. I also decided on a rhyming docket. -It struck me as a pleasing novelty, and I thought -the jingle would impress itself on Mr. Q.'s memory, -for he was meant to see this bogus despatch. I -took eight sheets of foolscap, virgin, spotless, -unblackened, folded them in the orthodox fashion, and -docketed them in a way I remember to this day. -It ran: first the particular year, then "Foreign -Office No. 3527. Secret and Confidential. Dated -March 3. Received March 11." Then came the -rhyming docket, -</p> - -<p class="poem"> - "General Kaufman's rumoured plan<br /> - To make Abdurrahman Khan<br /> - Ruler of Afghanistan."<br /> -</p> - -<p class="noindent"> -Under that I wrote in red ink in a different hand, -with a fine pen, -</p> - -<p class="quote"> -"<i>Urgent</i>. Instructions already acted on. See further -instructions re Afghanistan in No. 3534." -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -I was only twenty-two then, and my sense of -responsibility was not fully developed, or I should -not have acted so flightily. It still strikes me though -as an irresistibly attractive baited hook to offer to -an inquisitive newspaperman. I grieve to say that -I also wrote a "fake" decypher of a purely -apocryphal code telegram purporting to have come from -London. This was also on the subject of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P314"></a>314}</span> -Afghanistan. It struck me at the time as a perfectly -legitimate thing to do, in order to throw this Paul Pry -off the scent, for the Ambassador had impressed on -us all the vital importance of not disclosing the -real matter in dispute. I put these flagrant -forgeries in a drawer of my table and waited. I had -not to wait long. My colleagues having all gone -out to luncheon, I was alone in the Chancery one -day, when Mr. Q.'s card was brought in to me. I -kept him waiting until I had cleared every single -despatch from the tables and had locked them up. -I also locked up the Register, but put an -eight-year-old one, exactly similar in appearance, in its -place, opening it at a date two days earlier than -the actual date, in order that Mr. Q. might not -notice that the page (and "to-morrow's" page as -well) was already filled up, and the bogus despatch -and fake telegram from my drawer were duly -laid on the centre table. At twenty-two I was a -smooth-faced youth, in appearance, I believe, much -younger than my real age. Mr. Q. came in. He -had the "Well, old man" style, accompanied by a -thump on the back, which I peculiarly detest. He -must have blessed his luck in finding such a simple -youth in sole charge of the Chancery. Mr. Q. pursued -his usual tactics. He talked volubly in a -loud voice, walking about the room meanwhile. -The idiotic boy smoked cigarettes, and gaped -inanely. Mr. Q. went as usual to the window where -the Register lay in order to admire the view, and -the pudding-brained youth noticed nothing, but lit -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P315"></a>315}</span> -a fresh cigarette. That young fool never saw that -Mr. Paul Pry read unblushingly half a column of -the eight-year-old Register (How it must have -puzzled him!) under his very eyes. Mr. Q. then -went to the centre table, where he had, of course, -noticed the two papers lying, and proceeded to light -a cigar. That cigar must have drawn very badly, -for Mr. Q. had occasion to light it again and again, -bending well over the table as he did so. He kept -the unsuspicious youth engaged in incessant -conversation meanwhile. So careless and stupid a -boy ought never to have been left in charge of -important documents. Finally Mr. Q., having gained -all the information for which he had been thirsting -so long, left in a jubilant frame of mind, perfectly -unconscious that he had been subjected to the -slightest crural tension. -</p> - -<p> -When the Councillor of Embassy returned, I -made a clean breast of what I had done, and showed -him the bogus despatch and telegram I had -contrived. Quite rightly, I received a very severe -reprimand. I was warned against ever acting in -such an irregular fashion again, under the direst -penalties. In extenuation, I pointed out to the -Councillor that the inquisitive Mr. Q. was now -convinced that our difficulty with Russia was over -Afghanistan. -</p> - -<p> -I further added that should anyone be dishonourable -enough to come into the Chancery and deliberately -read confidential documents which he knew -were not intended for his eye, I clearly could not -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P316"></a>316}</span> -be held responsible for any false impressions he -might derive from reading them. That, I was told -sharply, was no excuse for my conduct. After this -"official wigging," the Councillor invited me to dine -with him that night, when we laughed loudly over -Mr. Q.'s discomfiture. That person became at -length such a nuisance that "his name was put -on the gate," and he was refused admission to the -Embassy. -</p> - -<p> -The great London daily which Mr. Q. represented -at Petrograd published some strong articles on -the grave menace to the Empire which a change of -rulers in Afghanistan might bring about; coupled -with Cassandra-like wails over the purblind British -statesmen who were wilfully shutting their eyes -to this impending danger, as well as to baneful -Russian machinations on our Indian frontier. There -were also some unflattering allusions to Abdurrahman -Khan. I, knowing that the whole story had -originated in my own brain, could not restrain -a chuckle whilst perusing these jeremiads. After -reading some particularly violent screed, the -Councillor of Embassy would shake his head at me. -"This is more of your work, you wretched boy!" After -an interval of forty years this little episode -can be recounted without harm. -</p> - -<p> -Talking of newspaper enterprise, many years -later, when the Emperor Alexander III died, the -editor of a well-known London evening paper, a -great friend of mine, told me in confidence of a -journalistic "scoop" he was meditating. Alexander III -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P317"></a>317}</span> -had died at Livadia in the Crimea, and his -body was to make a sort of triumphal progress -through Russia. The editor (he is no longer with -us, but when I term him "Harry" I shall be -revealing his identity to the few) was sending out a -Frenchman as special correspondent, armed with a -goodly store of roubles, and instructions to get -himself engaged as temporary assistant to the -undertaker in charge of the Emperor's funeral. This -cost, I believe, a considerable sum, but the Frenchman, -having entered on his gruesome duties, was -enabled to furnish the London evening paper with -the fullest details of all the funeral ceremonies. -</p> - -<p> -The reason the younger diplomats foregathered -so in Petrograd was that, as I said before, -Petrograd was to all intents and purposes -extra-European. Apart from its charming society, the -town, qua town, offered but few resources. The -younger Continental diplomats felt the entire -absence of cafés, of music-halls, and of places of light -entertainment very acutely; so they were thrown -on each other's society. In Far Eastern posts -such as Pekin or Tokyo, the diplomats live entirely -amongst themselves. For a European, there -are practically no resources whatever in Tokyo. -No one could possibly wish to frequent a Japanese -theatre, or a Japanese restaurant, when once the -novelty had worn off, and even Geisha entertainments -are deadly dull to one who cannot understand -a word of the language. Let us imagine a -party of Europeans arriving at some fashionable -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P318"></a>318}</span> -Japanese restaurant for a Geisha entertainment. -They will, of course, remove their shoes before -proceeding upstairs. I was always unfortunate enough -to find on these occasions one or more holes in -my socks gaping blatantly. In time one learns in -Japan to subject one's socks to a close scrutiny -in order to make sure that they are intact, for -everyone must be prepared to remove his shoes at -all hours of the day. We will follow the Europeans -up to a room on the upper floor, tastefully arranged -in Japanese fashion, and spotlessly neat and clean. -The temperature in this room in the winter months -would be Arctic, with three or four "fire-pots" -containing a few specks of mildly-glowing charcoal -waging a futile contest against the penetrating -cold. -</p> - -<p> -The room is apparently empty, but from behind -the sliding-panels giggles and titters begin, gradually -increasing in volume until the panels slide back, -and a number of self-conscious overdressed -children step into the room, one taking her place -beside each guest. These are "Micos"; little girls -being trained as professional Geishas. The -European conception of a Geisha is a totally wrong -one. They are simply entertainers; trained -singers, dancers, and story-tellers. The guests seat -themselves clumsily and uncomfortably on the floor -and the dinner begins. Japanese dishes are meant -to please the eye, which is fortunate, for they -certainly do not appeal to the palate. I invariably -drew one of the big pots of flowers which always -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P319"></a>319}</span> -decorate these places close up to me, and consigned -to its kindly keeping all the delicacies of the -Japanese <i>cuisine</i> which were beyond my assimilative -powers, such as slices of raw fish sprinkled with -sugar, and seasoned with salted ginger. The -tiresome little Micos kept up an incessant chatter. -Their stories were doubtless extraordinarily -humorous to anyone understanding Japanese, but were -apt to lose their point for those ignorant of the -language. The abortive attempts of the Europeans -to eat with chopsticks afforded endless amusement -to these bedizened children; they shook with -laughter at seeing all the food slide away from these -unaccustomed table implements. Not till the dinner -was over did the Geishas proper make their -appearance. In Japan the amount of bright colour -in a woman's dress varies in inverse ratio to her -moral rectitude. As our Geishas were all habited -in sober mouse-colour, or dull neutral-blue, I can -only infer that they were ladies of the very highest -respectability. They were certainly wonderfully -attractive little people. They were not pretty -according to our standards, but there was a vivacity -and a sort of air of dainty grace about them that -were very captivating. Their singing is frankly -awful. I have heard four-footed musicians on the -London tiles produce sweeter sounds, but their -dancing is graceful to a degree. Unfortunately, -one of the favourite amusements of these charming -and vivacious little people is to play "Musical -Chairs"—without any chairs! They made all the -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P320"></a>320}</span> -European men follow them round and round the -room whilst two Geishas thrummed on a sort of -guitar. As soon as the music stopped everyone was -expected to sit down with a bang on the floor, To -these little Japs five feet high, the process was easy, -and may have seemed good fun; to a middle-aged -gentleman, "vir pietate gravis," these violent shocks -were more than painful, and I failed to derive the -smallest amusement from them. No Japanese dinner -would be complete without copious miniature cups of -sake. This rice-spirit is always drunken hot; it is not -disagreeable to the taste, being like warm sherry with -a dash of methylated spirit thrown in, but the little -sake bottles and cups are a joy to the eye. This -innately artistic people delight to lavish loving care in -fashioning minute objects; many English drawing-rooms -contain sake bottles in enamel or porcelain -ranged in cabinets as works of art. Their form would -be more familiar to most people than their use. -Japanese always seem to look on a love of colour -as showing rather vulgar tastes. The more refined -the individual, the more will he adhere to sober -black and white and neutral tints in his house and -personal belongings. The Emperor's palace in -Kyoto is decorated entirely in black and white, with -unpainted, unlacquered woodwork, and no colour -anywhere. The Kyoto palace of the great Tokugawa -family, on the other hand, a place of astounding -beauty, blazes with gilding, enamels, and lacquer, -as do all the tombs and temples erected by -this dynasty. The Tokugawas usurped power as -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P321"></a>321}</span> -Shoguns in 1603, reducing the Mikado to a mere -figure-head as spiritual Ruler, and the Shoguns -ruled Japan absolutely until 1868, when they were -overthrown, and Shogun and Mikado were merged -into one under the title of Emperor. I fancy that -the Japanese look upon the polychrome splendour -of all the buildings erected by the Tokugawas as -proof that they were very inferior to the ancient -dynasty, who contented themselves with plain -buildings severely decorated in black and white. The -lack of colour in Japan is very noticeable on -arriving from untidy, picturesque China. The beautiful -neatness and cleanliness of Japan are very -refreshing after slovenly China, but the endless rows -of little brown, unpainted, tidy houses, looking like -so many rabbit hutches, are depressing to a degree. -The perpetual earthquakes are responsible for the -low elevation of these houses and also for their -being invariably built of wood, as is indeed -everything else in the country. I was immensely -disappointed at the sight of the first temples I visited -in Japan. The forms were beautiful enough, but -they were all of unpainted wood, without any -colour whatever, and looked horribly neutral-tinted. -All the famous temples of Kyoto are of plain, -unpainted, unvarnished wood. The splendid group -of temples at Nikko are the last word in Japanese -art. They glow with colour; with scarlet and black -lacquer, gilding, enamels, and bronzes, every -detail finished like jewellers' work with exquisite -craftmanship, and they are amongst the most -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P322"></a>322}</span> -beautiful things in the world; but they were all erected -by the Tokugawa dynasty, as were the equally -superb temples in the Shiba Park at Tokyo. This -family seemed determined to leave Japan less -colourless than they found it; in their great love -for scarlet lacquer they must have been the first -people who thought of painting a town red. -</p> - -<p> -The same lack of colour is found in the gardens. -I had pictured a Japanese garden as a dream of -beauty, so when I was shewn a heap of stones -interspersed with little green shrubs and dwarf -trees, without one single flower, I was naturally -disappointed, nor had I sufficient imagination to -picture a streak of whitewash daubed down a rock -as a quivering cascade of foaming water. "Our -gardens, sir," said my host, "are not intended to -inspire hilarit .. ee, but rather to create a gentle -melanchol .. ee." As regards myself, his certainly -succeeded in its object. -</p> - -<p> -A friend of mine, whose gardens, not a hundred -miles from London, are justly famous, takes -immense pride in her Japanese garden, as she fondly -imagines it to be. At the time of King George's -Coronation she invited the special Japanese Envoys -to luncheon, for the express purpose of showing -them her gardens afterwards. She kept the -Japanese garden to the last as a <i>bonne-bouche</i>, -half-expecting these children of the Land of the Rising -Sun to burst into happy tears at this reminder of -their distant island home. The special Envoys -thanked her with true Japanese politeness, and loudly -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P323"></a>323}</span> -expressed their delight at seeing a real English -garden. They added that they had never even -imagined anything like this in Japan, and begged -for a design of it, in order that they might create -a real English garden in their native land on their -return home. -</p> - -<p> -As I have said, no Japanese woman can wear -bright colours without sacrificing her moral -reputation, but little girls may wear all the colours of -the rainbow until they are eight years old or so. -These little girls, with their hair cut straight -across their forehead, are very attractive-looking -creatures, whereas a Japanese boy, with his cropped -head, round face, and projecting teeth, is the -most comically hideous little object imaginable. -These children's appearance is spoilt by an -objectionable superstition which decrees it unlucky to -use a pocket-handkerchief on a child until he, or -she, is nine years old. The result is unspeakably -deplorable. -</p> - -<p> -The interior of our Embassy at Tokyo was -rather a surprise. Owing to the constant -earthquakes in Tokyo and Yokohama, all the buildings -have to be of wood. The British Embassy was -built in London (I believe by a very well-known -firm in Tottenham Court Road), and was shipped -out to Japan complete down to its last detail. -The architect who designed it unhappily took a -glorified suburban villa as his model. So the -Tokyo Embassy house is an enlarged "Belmont," -or "The Cedars," or "Tokyo Towers." Every -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P324"></a>324}</span> -familiar detail is there; the tiled hall, the glazed -door into the garden, and the heavy mahogany -chimneypieces and overmantels. In the library -with its mahogany book-cases, green morocco chairs, -and green plush curtains, it was difficult to realise -that one was not in Hampstead or Upper Tooting. -I always felt that I was quite out of the picture -unless I sallied forth at 9 a.m. with a little black -bag in my hand, and returned at 6 p.m. with some -fish in a bass-basket. In spite of being common-place, -the house was undeniably comfortable. Everything -Japanese was rigidly excluded from it. That -in far-off lands is very natural. People do not care -to be reminded perpetually of the distance they -are away from home. In Calcutta the Maidan, the -local Hyde Park, has nothing Eastern about it. -Except in the Eden Gardens in one corner of it, -where there is a splendid tangle of tropical -vegetation, there is not one single palm tree on the -Maidan. The broad sweeps of turf, clumps of trees, -and winding roads make an excellent imitation of -Hyde Park transferred to the banks of the Hooghly, -and this is intentional. There is one spot in -particular, where the tall Gothic spire of St. Paul's -Cathedral rises out of a clump of trees beyond a -great tank (it may be pointed out that "tank" in -India does not refer to a clumsy, mobile engine of -destruction, but is the word used for a pool or pond), -which might be in Kensington Gardens but for the -temperature. The average Briton likes to be -reminded of his home, and generally manages to carry -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P325"></a>325}</span> -it about with him somehow. The Russian Embassy -at Tokyo had been built in the same way in Paris -and sent out, and was a perfect reproduction of a -French Louis XV house. The garden of the British -Embassy had one striking feature which I have -seen nowhere else; hedges of clipped camellias, four -feet high. When these blossomed in the spring, -they looked like solid walls of pink, crimson, or -white flowers, a really beautiful sight! -</p> - -<p> -Some former British Minister had planted the -public roads round the Embassy with avenues of the -pink-flowering cherry, as a present to the city of -Tokyo. The Japanese affect to look down on the -pink cherry, when compared to their adored white -cherry-blossom, I suppose because there is colour -in it. Certainly the acres of white cherry-blossom -in the Uyeno Park at Tokyo are one of the sights -of Japan. In no other country in the world would -the railways run special trains to enable the -country-people to see the cherries in full bloom in this -Uyeno Park. The blossom is only supposed to be -at its best for three days. In no other country -either would people flock by hundreds to a temple, -as they did at Kyoto, to look at a locally-famed -contrast of red plum-blossom against dark-brown -maple leaves. I liked these Japanese country-people. -The scrupulously neat old peasant women, -with their grey hair combed carefully back, and -their rosy faces, were quite attractive. Their -intense ceremonious politeness to each other always -amused me. Whole family parties would continue -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P326"></a>326}</span> -bowing to each other for ten minutes on end at -railway stations, sucking their breath, and rubbing -their knees. When they had finished, someone -would recommence, and the whole process would -have to be gone through again, the children sucking -their breath louder even than their elders. -Anybody who has lived in a warm climate must be -familiar with the curious sound of thousands of frogs -croaking at once in a pond or marsh at night-time. -The sound of hundreds of Japanese wooden clogs -clattering against the tiles of a railway platform is -exactly like that. In the big Shimbashi station at -Tokyo, as the clogs pattered over the tiles, by -shutting my eyes I could imagine that I was listening to -a frogs' orchestra in some large marsh. -</p> - -<p> -Excessive politeness brings at times its own -penalty. At the beginning of these reminiscences I -have related how I went with a Special Embassy to -Rome in my extreme youth. The day before our -departure from Rome, King Humbert gave a farewell -luncheon party at the Quirinal to the Special -British Ambassador and his suite, including of -course myself. At this luncheon a somewhat comical -incident occurred. -</p> - -<p> -When we took our leave, Queen Margherita, then -still radiantly beautiful, offered her hand first to the -Special British Ambassador. He, a courtly and -gallant gentleman of the old school, at once dropped -on one knee, in spite of his age, and kissed the -Queen's hand "in the grand manner." The -permanent British Ambassador, the late Sir Augustus Paget, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P327"></a>327}</span> -most courteous and genial of men, followed -his temporary colleague's example, and also dropped -on one knee. The Italian Ministers present could -not do less than follow the lead of the foreigners, or -show themselves less courteous than the <i>forestieri</i>, -so they too had perforce to drop on one knee whilst -kissing the Queen's hand. A hugely obese Minister, -buttoned into the tightest of frockcoats, approached -the Queen. With immense difficulty he lowered -himself on to one knee, and kissed the Royal hand; but -no power on earth seemed equal to raising him to -his feet again. The corpulent Minister grew purple -in the face; the most ominous sounds of the rending -of cloth and linen re-echoed through the room; but -still he could not manage to rise. The Queen held -out her hand to assist her husband's adipose adviser -to regain his feet, but he was too dignified, or too -polite, to accept it. The rending of the statesman's -most intimate garments became more audible than -ever; the portly Minister seemed on the verge of an -attack of apoplexy. It must be understood that -the Queen was standing alone before the throne, -with this unfortunate dignitary kneeling before her; -the remainder of the guests were standing in a -semi-circle some twenty feet away. The Queen's mouth -began to twitch ominously, until, in spite of her -self-control, after a few preliminary splutters of -involuntary merriment, she broke down, and absolutely -shook with laughter. Sir Augustus Paget and a -Roman Prince came up and saved the situation by -raising, with infinite difficulty, the unfortunate -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P328"></a>328}</span> -Italian statesman to his feet. As he resumed a -standing position, a perfect Niagara of oddments of -apparel, of tags and scraps of his most private -under-garments, rained upon the floor, and we all -experienced a feeling of intense relief when this -capable, if corpulent, Cabinet Minister was enabled -to regain the background with all his clothing -outwardly intact. -</p> - -<p> -And all this came about from an excess of politeness. -The East has always been the land of flowery -compliments, also the land of hyperbole. I once saw -the answer the Viceroy of India had received from a -certain tributary Prince, who had been reprimanded -in the sharpest fashion by the Government of India. -The native Prince had been warned in the bluntest -of language that unless he mended his ways at once -he would be forthwith deposed, and another ruler -put in his place. A list of his recent enormities was -added, in order to refresh his memory, and the -warning as to the future was again emphasized. The -Prince's answer, addressed direct to the Viceroy, -began as follows: -</p> - -<p> -"Your Excellency's gracious message has reached -me. It was more precious to the eyes than a casket -of rubies; sweeter to the taste than a honeycomb; -more delightful to the ears than the song of ten -thousand nightingales. I spread it out before me, and -read it repeatedly: each time with renewed pleasure." -</p> - -<p> -Considering the nature of the communication, that -native Prince must have been of a touchingly -grateful disposition. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P329"></a>329}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The late Duke of Edinburgh was once presented -with an address at Hong Kong from the Corporation -of Chinese Merchants, in which he was told, -amongst other things, that he "was more glorious -than a phoenix sitting in a crimson nest with -fourteen golden tails streaming behind him." Surely a -charming flight of fancy! -</p> - -<p> -True politeness in China demands that you should -depreciate everything of your own and exalt -everything belonging to your correspondent. Thus, -should you be asking a friend to dinner, you would -entreat him "to leave for one evening the silver -and alabaster palace in which you habitually dwell, -and to condescend to honour the tumble-down -vermin-ridden hovel in which I drag out a wretched -existence. Furthermore, could you forget for one -evening the bird's-nest soup, the delicious sea-slugs, -and the plump puppy-dogs on which you habitually -feast, and deign to poke your head into my -swill-trough, and there devour such loathsome garbage -as a starving dog would reject, I shall feel -unspeakably honoured." The answer will probably come -in some such form as this: "With rapturous -delight have I learnt that, thanks to your courtesy, I -may escape from the pestilential shanty I inhabit, -and pass one unworthy evening in a glorious palace -of crystal and gold in your company. After -starving for months on putrid offal, I shall at length -banquet on unimagined delicacies, etc." Should it be a -large dinner-party, it must tax the host's ingenuity -to vary the self-depreciatory epithets sufficiently. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P330"></a>330}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The mention of food reminds me that it is an -acute difficulty to the stranger in Japan, should -he wander off the beaten track and away from -European hotels. Japanese use neither bread, -butter, nor milk, and these things, as well as meat, -are unprocurable in country districts. Europeans -miss bread terribly, and the Japanese substitute of -cold rice is frankly horrible. Instead of the snowy -piles of smoking-hot, beautifully cooked rice of -India, rice in Japan means a cold, clammy, gelatinous -mass, hideously distasteful to a European interior. -That, eggs, and tea like a decoction of hay constitute -the standard menu of a Japanese country inn. I -never saw either a sheep or cow in Japan, as there -is no pasture. The universal bamboo-grass, with -its sharp edges, pierces the intestines of any animal -feeding on it, and so is worse than useless as fodder -for cattle or sheep. All milk and butter are -imported in a frozen state from Australia, but do not, -of course, penetrate beyond Europe-fashion hotels, -as the people of the country do not care for them. -</p> - -<p> -The exquisite neatness of Japanese farm houses, -with their black and white walls, thatched roofs, -and trim little bamboo fences and gates, is a real -joy to the eye of one who has grown accustomed -to the slipshod untidy East, or even to the -happy-go-lucky methods of the American Continent. I -never remember a Japanese village unequipped -with either electric light or telephones. I really -think geographers must have placed the 180th -degree in the wrong place, and that Japs are really -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P331"></a>331}</span> -the most Western of Westerns, instead of being -the most Eastern of Easterns. Pretty and attractive -as the Japanese country is, its charm was spoilt -for me by the almost total absence of bird and -animal life. There are hardly any wild flowers either, -except deliciously fragrant wild violets. Being in -Japan, it is hardly necessary to say that these violets, -instead of being of the orthodox colour, are bright -yellow. They would be in Japan. This quaint -people who only like trees when they are contorted, -who love flowerless gardens, whose grass kills -cattle, who have evolved peach, plum and cherry trees -which flower gloriously but never bear any fruit, -would naturally have yellow violets. They are -certainly a wonderfully hardy race. I was at -beautiful Nikko in the early spring when they were -building a dam across the Nikko river. The stream has -a tremendous current, and is ice-cold. Men were -working at the dam up to their waists in the icy -river, and little boys kept bringing them baskets -of building stones, up to their necks in the swift -current. Both men and boys issued from the river -as scarlet as lobsters from the intense cold, and -yet they stood about quite unconcernedly in their -dripping thin cotton clothes in the keen wind. Had -they been Europeans, they would all have died of -pneumonia in two days' time. A race must have -great powers of endurance that live in houses with -paper walls without any heating appliances during -the sharp cold of a Japanese winter, and that find -thin cotton clothing sufficient for their wants. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P332"></a>332}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The outlines and pleasing details of those black -and white country dwellings with the graceful curves -of their roofs are a relief to the eye after the -endless miles of ugly little brown rabbit hutches of the -towns. At Tokyo the enclosure and park of the -Emperor's palace lay just outside the gates of our -Embassy, surrounded by a moat so broad that it -could be almost called a lake. It was curious in -the heart of a town to see this moat covered with -innumerable wild duck. Although I have been in -the Imperial palace at Kyoto, I was never inside -the one at Tokyo, so I cannot give any details about -it. The glimpses one obtained from outside of its -severe black and white outlines recalled a European -mediæval castle, and had something strangely -familiar about them. I was never fortunate enough -either to be invited to an Imperial duck-catching -party, which I would have given anything to witness. -The idea of catching wild duck in butterfly nets -would never occur to anyone but the Japanese. -The place where this quaint amusement was -indulged in was an extensive tract of flat ground -intersected by countless reed-fringed little canals and -waterways, much on the lines of a marsh in the -Norfolk Broad district. I saw the Ambassador -on his return from a duck-catching party. With -superhuman efforts, and a vast amount of exercise, -he had managed to capture three ducks, and he -told me that he had had to run like a hare to -achieve even this modest success. All the guests -were expected to appear in high hats and frock-coats -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P333"></a>333}</span> -on these occasions, and I should have dearly -loved to see the Ambassador arrayed in frock-coat -and high hat bounding hot-foot over the marshes, -his butterfly net poised aloft, in pursuit of his -quacking quarry. The newspapers informed us the next -day that the Crown Prince had headed the list as -usual with a bag of twenty-seven ducks, and I -always believe what I see in print. Really Europeans -start heavily handicapped at this peculiar diversion. -I have known many families in England where the -sons of the house are instructed from a very early -age in riding, and in the art of handling a gun and -a trout rod, but even in the most sport-loving -British families the science of catching wild duck in -butterfly nets forms but seldom part of the sporting -curriculum of the rising generation. Though the -Imperial family are Shintoists, I expect that the -Buddhist horror of taking animal life is at the -bottom of this idea of duck-catching, for the ducks -are, I believe, all set free again after their capture. -</p> - -<p> -We always heard that the Emperor and his -family lived entirely on rice and fish in the frugal -Japanese fashion, and that they never tasted meat. -</p> - -<p> -I had the opportunity of seeing a very fine house -of sixty rooms, built in strict Japanese style, and -just completed. Count Mitsu is one of the few very -wealthy men in Japan; he can also trace his -pedigree back for three thousand years. He had built -this house in Tokyo, and as it was supposed to be the -last word in purity of style ("Itchi-Ban," or -"Number One," as the Japanese express it), he very -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P334"></a>334}</span> -kindly invited the ambassador and myself to go all -over it with him. We had, of course, to remove our -shoes on entering, and my pleasure was somewhat -marred by the discovery of a large hole in one sock, -on which I fancied the gaze of the entire Mitsu -family was riveted. Nothing can equal the -high-bred courtesy and politeness of Japanese of really -ancient lineage. Countess Mitsu, of a family as -old as her husband's, had a type of face which we -do not usually associate with Japan, and is only -found in ladies of the Imperial family and some -others equally old. In place of the large head, full -cheeks, and flat features of the ordinary Japanese -woman, Countess Mitsu and her daughters had thin -faces with high aquiline features, giving them an -extraordinarily high-bred and distinguished -appearance. This great house consisted of a vast number -of perfectly empty rooms, destitute of one single -scrap of furniture. There was fine matting on the -floor, a niche with one kakemono hanging in it, one -bronze or other work of art, and a vase with one -single flower, and nothing else whatever. The -Mitsus being a very high caste family, there was no -colour anywhere. The decoration was confined to -black and white and beautifully-finished, unpainted, -unvarnished woodwork, except for the exquisitely -chased bronze door-grips (door-handles would be -an incorrect term for these grips to open and close -the sliding panels). I must confess that I never -saw a more supremely uncomfortable-looking dwelling -in my life. The children's nurseries upstairs -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P335"></a>335}</span> -were a real joy. The panels had been painted by a -Japanese artist with everything calculated to amuse -a child. There were pictures of pink and blue -rabbits, purple frogs, scarlet porcupines, and -grass-green guinea-pigs, all with the most comical -expressions imaginable on their faces. The lamps -were of fish-skin shaped over thin strips of bamboo -into the form of the living fish, then highly coloured, -and fitted with electric globes inside them; weird, -luminous marine monsters! Each child had a little -Chinese dressing-table of mother-of-pearl eighteen -inches high, and a tub of real Chinese "powder-blue" -porcelain as a bath. The windows looked on -to a fascinating dwarf garden ten feet square, with -real waterfalls, tiny rivers of real water, miniature -mountains and dwarf trees, all in perfect proportion. -It was like looking at an extensive landscape -through the wrong end of a telescope. -</p> - -<p> -The polite infants who inhabited this child's -paradise received us with immense courtesy, lying at -full length on the floor on their little tummies, and -wagging their little heads in salutation, till I really -thought they would come off. -</p> - -<p> -The most interesting thing in Count Mitsu's -house was a beautiful little Shinto temple of -bronze-gold lacquer, where all the names of his many -ancestors were inscribed on gilt tablets. Here he and -all his sons (women take no part in ancestor -worship) came nightly, and made a full confession -before the tablets of their ancestors of all they had -done during the day; craving for pardon should -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P336"></a>336}</span> -they have acted in a fashion unworthy of their -family and of Japan. The Count and his sons then -lighted the little red lamps before the tablets of -their forebears to show that they were not forgotten, -and placed the exquisitely carved little ivory -"ghost-ship" two inches long in its place, should any of -their ancestors wish to return that night from the -Land of Spirits to their old home. -</p> - -<p> -The underlying idea of undying family affection -is rather a beautiful one. -</p> - -<p> -That same evening I went to a very interesting -dinner-party at the house of Prince Arisugawa, a -son-in-law of the Emperor's. Both the dinner and -the house were on European lines, but the main -point of interest was that it was a gathering of -all the Generals and Admirals who had taken a -prominent part in the Russo-Japanese war. I was -placed between an Admiral and a General, but -found it difficult to communicate with them, -Japanese being conspicuously bad linguists. The -General could speak a little fairly unintelligible -German; the Admiral could stutter a very little -Russian. It was a pity that the roads of communication -were so blocked for us, for I shall probably -never again sit between two men who had had such -thrilling experiences. I cursed the builders of the -Tower of Babel for erecting this linguistic barrier -between us. -</p> - -<p> -I found that I was a full head taller than all the -Japanese in the room. Princess Arisugawa appeared -later. This tiny, dainty, graceful little lady -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P337"></a>337}</span> -had the same strongly aquiline type of features as -Countess Mitsu, and the same high-bred look of -distinction. She was beautifully dressed in -European style, and had Rue de la Paix written all over -her clothes and her jewels. I have seldom seen -anyone with such taking graceful dignity as this -daughter of the Imperial house, in spite of her -diminutive stature. -</p> - -<p> -The old families in Japan have a pretty custom -of presenting every European guest with a little -black-and-gold lacquer box, two inches high, full -of sweetmeats, of the sort we called in my youth -"hundreds and thousands." These little boxes -bear on their tops in gold lacquer the badge or -crest of the family, thus serving as permanent -souvenirs. -</p> - -<p> -In a small community such as the European -diplomats formed at Tokyo, the peculiarities and -foibles of the "chers collègues" formed naturally -an unending topic of conversation. There was one -foreign representative who was determined to avoid -bankruptcy, could the most rigorously careful -regulation of his expenditure avert such a catastrophe. -His official position forced him to give occasional -dinner-parties, much, I imagine, against his -inclinations. He always, in the winter months, borrowed -all the available oil-stoves from his colleagues and -friends, when one of these festivities was contemplated, -in order to warm his official residence without -having to go to the expense of fires. He had in -some mad fit of extravagance bought two dozen of -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P338"></a>338}</span> -a really fine claret some years before. The wine had -long since been drunk; the bottles he still retained -<i>with their labels</i>. It was his custom to buy the -cheapest and roughest red wine he could find, and -then enshrine it in these old bottles with their -mendacious labels. At his dinner-parties these -time-worn bottles were always ranged down the -tables. The evidence of palate and eye was -conflicting. The palate (as far as it could -discriminate through the awful reek with which the -oil-stoves filled the room), pronounced it sour, -immature <i>vin ordinaire</i>. The label on the bottle -proclaimed it Château Margaux of 1874, actually -bottled at the Château itself. Politeness dictated -that we should compliment our host on this exquisite -vintage, which had, perhaps, begun to feel (as -we all do) the effects of extreme old age. A cynical -Dutch colleague might possibly hazard a few -remarks, lamenting the effects of the Japanese -climate on "les premiers crus de Bordeaux." -</p> - -<p> -Life at any post would be dull were it not for -the little failings of the "chers collègues," which -always give one something to talk of. -</p> - -<p> -The Japanese are ruining the beauty of their -country by their insane mania for advertising. The -railways are lined with advertisements; a beautiful -hillside is desecrated by a giant advertisement, -cut in the turf, and filled in with white concrete. -Even the ugly little streets of brown packing-cases -are plastered with advertisements. The fact that -these advertisements are all in Chinese characters -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P339"></a>339}</span> -give them a rather pleasing exotic flavour at first; -that soon wears off, and then one is only too -thankful not to be able to read them. They remain a -hideous disfigurement of a fair land. -</p> - -<p> -One large Japanese-owned department store in -Tokyo had a brass band playing in front of it all -day, producing an ear-splitting din. The bandsmen -were little Japanese boys dressed, of all things -in the world, as Highlanders. No one who has -not seen it can imagine the intensely grotesque -effect of a little stumpy, bandy-legged Jap boy -in a red tartan kilt, bare knees, and a Glengarry -bonnet. No one who has not heard them can -conceive the appalling sounds they produced from -their brass instruments, or can form any -conception of the Japanese idea of "rag-time." -</p> - -<p> -We have in this country some very competent -amateurs who, to judge from the picture papers, -have reduced the gentle art of self-advertisement -to a science. -</p> - -<p> -I think these ladies would be repaid for the -trouble of a voyage to Japan by the new ideas in -advertisement they would pick up from that -enterprising people. They need not blow their own -trumpets, like the little Jap Highlander -bandsmen; they can get it done for them as they know, -by the Press. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="chap11"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P340"></a>340}</span></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER XI -</h3> - -<p class="intro"> -Petrograd through middle-aged eyes—Russians very constant -friends—Russia an Empire of shams—Over-centralisation -in administration—The system hopeless—A complete change -of scene—The West Indies—Trinidad—Personal Character -of Nicholas II—The weak point in an Autocracy—The -Empress—An opportunity missed—The Great Collapse—Terrible -stories—Love of human beings for ceremonial—Some -personal apologies—Conclusion. -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p> -I returned twice to Petrograd in later years, the -last occasion being in 1912. A young man is -generally content with the surface of things, and -accepts them at their face value, without attempting -to probe deeper. With advancing years comes the -desire to test beneath the surface. To the eye, -there is but little difference between electro-plate -and solid silver, though one deep scratch on the -burnished expanse of the former is sufficient to -reveal the baser metal underlying it. -</p> - -<p> -Things Russian have for some reason always had -a strange attraction for me, and their glamour had -not departed even after so many years. It was -pleasant, too, to hear the soft, sibilant Russian -tongue again. My first return visit was at -mid-summer, and seeing Peter's City wreathed in the -tender vivid greenery of Northern foliage, and -bathed in sunshine, I wondered how I could ever -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P341"></a>341}</span> -have mentally labelled it with the epithet "dreary." Rising -from the clear swift-rushing waters of the -many-channelled Neva, its stately pillared classical -buildings outlined through the soft golden haze -in half-tones of faintest cobalt and rose-madder, -this Northern Venice appeared a dream-city, -almost unreal in its setting of blue waters and golden -domes, lightly veiled in opal mist. -</p> - -<p> -Russians are not as a rule long-lived, and the -great majority of my old friends had passed away. -I could not help being affected by the manner in -which the survivors amongst them welcomed me -back. "Cher ami," said the bearer of a great -Russian name to me, "thirty-three years ago we -adopted you as a Russian. You were a mere boy -then, you are now getting an old man, but as -long as any of your friends of old days are alive, -our houses are always open to you, and you will -always find a place for you at our tables, without -an invitation. We Russians do not change, and -we never forget our old friends. We know that -you like us and our country, and my husband and -I offer you all we have." No one could fail to be -touched by such steadfast friendship, so characteristic -of these warm-hearted people. -</p> - -<p> -The great charm of Russians with three or four -hundred years of tradition behind them is their -entire lack of pretence and their hatred of shams. -They are absolutely natural. They often gave me -as their reason for disliking foreigners the -artificiality of non-Russians, though they expressly -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P342"></a>342}</span> -exempted our own nationality from this charge. That -is, I think, the reason why most Englishmen get -on so well with educated Russians. -</p> - -<p> -Seeing Petrograd with the wearied eyes of -experienced middle age, I quite realised that the -imposing palaces that front the line of the quays -and seem almost to float on the Neva, are every -one of them built on piles, driven deep into the -marshy subsoil. Every single house in the city -rests on the same artificial base. Montferrand -the Frenchman's great cathedral of St. Isaac has -had its north front shored up by scaffolding for -thirty years. Otherwise it would have collapsed, -as the unstable subsoil is unable to bear so great -a burden. On the Highest Authority we know -that only a house built on the rock can endure. -This city of Petrograd was built on a quagmire, and -was typical, in that respect, of the vast Empire -of which it was the capital: an Empire erected by -Peter on shifting sand. The whole fabric of this -Empire struck my maturer senses as being one -gigantic piece of "camouflage." -</p> - -<p> -For instance, a building close to St. Isaac's bears -on its stately front the inscription "Governing -Senate" (I may add that the terse, crisp Russian -for this is "Pravitelsvouyuschui Senat"). To an -ordinary individual the term would seem to -indicate what it says; he would be surprised to learn -that, so far from "governing," the Senate had -neither legislative nor administrative powers of -its own. It was merely a consultative body without -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P343"></a>343}</span> -any delegate initiative; only empowered to -recommend steps for carrying into effect the orders -it received. -</p> - -<p> -And so with many other things. There were -imposing façades, with awe-inspiring inscriptions, -but I had a curious feeling that everything stopped -at the façade, and there was nothing behind it. -</p> - -<p> -Students of history will remember how, on the -occasion of Catherine the Great's visit to the -Crimea, her favourite, Potemkin, had "camouflage" -villages erected along the line of her progress, -so that wherever she went she found merry -peasants (specially selected from the Imperial -theatres) singing and dancing amidst flower-wreathed -cottages. These villages were then taken down, -and re-erected some fifty miles further along the -Empress's way, with the same inhabitants. It -was really a triumph of "camouflage," and did -great credit to Potemkin's inventive faculty. -Catherine returned North with most agreeable -recollections of the teeming population of the Crimea; of -its delightfully picturesque villages, and of the -ideal conditions of life prevailing there. -</p> - -<p> -The whole Russian Empire appeared to my -middle-aged eyes to be like Potemkin's toy villages. -</p> - -<p> -My second later visit to Petrograd was in 1912, -in midwinter, when I came to the unmistakable -conclusion that the epithet "dreary" was not -misplaced. The vast open spaces and broad streets -with their scanty traffic were unutterably depressing -during the short hours of uncertain daylight, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P344"></a>344}</span> -whilst the whirling snowflakes fell incessantly, and -the low, leaden sky pressed like a heavy pall over -this lifeless city of perpetual twilight. -</p> - -<p> -The particular business on which I had gone to -Petrograd took me daily to the various Ministries, -and their gloomy interiors became very familiar -to me. -</p> - -<p> -I then saw that in these Ministries the impossible -had been attempted in the way of centralisation. -The principle of the Autocracy had been carried -into the administrative domain, and every trivial -detail affecting the government of an Empire -stretching from the Pacific to the Baltic was in -theory controlled by one man, the Minister of the -Department concerned. Russians are conspicuously -lacking in initiative and in organising power. -The lack of initiative is perhaps the necessary -corollary of an Autocracy, for under an Autocracy -it would be unsafe for any private individual to -show much original driving power: and organisation -surely means successful delegation. A born -organiser chooses his subordinates with great care; -having chosen them, he delegates certain duties to -them, and as long as they perform these duties to -his satisfaction he does not interfere with them. -The Russian system was just the reverse: everything -was nominally concentrated in the hands of one man. -A really able and zealous Minister might possibly -have settled a hundredth part of the questions -daily submitted for his personal decision. It -required no great political foresight to understand -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P345"></a>345}</span> -that, were this administrative machine subjected -to any unusual strain, it would collapse into -hopeless confusion. -</p> - -<p> -Being no longer young, I found the penetrating -damp cold of Petrograd very trying. The airlessness -too of the steam-heated and hermetically sealed -houses affected me. I had, in any case, intended to -proceed to the West Indies as soon as my task in -Petrograd was concluded. As my business occupied -a far longer time than I had anticipated, I -determined to go direct to London from Petrograd, -stay two nights there, and then join the mail -steamer for the West Indies. -</p> - -<p> -Thus it came about that I was drinking my -morning coffee in a room of the British Embassy at -Petrograd, looking through the double windows at -the driving snowflakes falling on the Troitsky -Square, at the frozen hummocks of the Neva, and -at the sheepskin-clothed peasants plodding through -the fresh-fallen snowdrifts, whilst the grey -cotton-wool sky seemed to press down almost on to the -roofs of the houses, and the golden needle of the -Fortress Church gleamed dully through the murky -atmosphere. Three weeks afterwards to a day, I -was sitting in the early morning on a balcony on -the upper floor of Government House, Trinidad, -clad in the lightest of pyjamas, enjoying the only -approach to coolness to be found in that sultry -island. The balcony overlooked the famous Botanic -Gardens which so enraptured Charles Kingsley. In -front of me rose a gigantic Saman tree, larger than -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P346"></a>346}</span> -any oak, one mass of tenderest green, and of -tassels of silky pink blossoms. At dawn, the dew -still lay on those blossoms, and swarms of hummingbirds, -flashing living jewels of ruby, sapphire, and -emerald, were darting to and fro taking their toll -of the nectar. The nutmeg trees were in flower, -perfuming the whole air, and the fragrance of a -yellow tree-gardenia, an importation from West -Africa, was almost overpowering. The chatter of the -West Indian negroes, and of the East Indian coolies -employed in the Botanic Gardens, replaced the soft, -hissing Russian language, and over the gorgeous -tropical tangle of the gardens the Venezulean -mountains of the mainland rose mistily blue across the -waters of the Gulf of Paria. I do not believe that -in three short weeks it would be possible to find a -greater change in climatic, geographical, or social -conditions. From a temperature of 5° below zero -to 94° in the shade; from the Gulf of Finland to -the Spanish Main; from snow and ice to the exuberant -tropical vegetation of one of the hottest islands -in the world! The change, too, from the lifeless, -snow-swept streets of Petrograd, monotonously grey -in the sad-coloured Northern winter daylight, to -the gaily painted bungalows of the white inhabitants -of the Port-of-Spain, standing in gardens blazing -with impossibly brilliant flowers of scarlet, -orange, and vivid blue, quivering under the fierce rays -of the sun, was sufficiently startling. The only -flowers I have ever seen to rival the garish -rainbow brilliance of the gardens of Port-of-Spain -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P347"></a>347}</span> -were the painted ones in the "Zauber-Garten" in -the second act of "Parsifal," as given at Bayreuth. -</p> - -<p> -It so happened that when Nicholas II visited -India in 1890 as Heir-Apparent, I stayed in the -same house with him for ten days, and consequently -saw a great deal of him. He was, I am convinced, -a most conscientious man, intensely anxious to -fulfill his duty to the people he would one day rule; -but he was inconstant of purpose, and his -intellectual equipment was insufficient for his -responsibilities. The fatal flaw in an Autocracy is that -everything obviously hinges on the personal -character of the Autocrat. It would be absurd to -expect an unbroken series of rulers of first-class -ability. It is, I suppose, for this reason that the -succession to the Russian throne was, in theory at -all events, not hereditary. The Tsars of old -nominated their successors, and I think I am right in -saying that the Emperors still claimed the privilege. -In fact, to set any limitations to the power of an -Autocrat would be a contradiction in terms. -</p> - -<p> -Nicholas II was always influenced by those -surrounding him, and it cannot be said that he chose -his associates with much discretion. There was, in -particular, one fatal influence very near indeed to -him. From those well qualified to judge, I hear that -it is unjust to accuse the Empress of being a -Germanophile, or of being in any way a traitor to the -interests of her adopted country. She was obsessed -with one idea: to hand on the Autocracy intact to -her idolised little son, and she had, in addition, a -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P348"></a>348}</span> -great love of power. When the love of power -takes possession of a woman, it seems to change -her whole character, and my own experience is -that no woman will ever voluntarily surrender one -scrap of that power, be the consequences what they -may. When to a naturally imperious nature there -is joined a neurotic, hysterical temperament, the -consequences can be disastrous. The baneful -influence of the obscene illiterate monk Rasputin over -the Empress is a matter of common knowledge, and -she, poor woman, paid dearly enough for her faults. -I always think that Nicholas II missed the great -opportunity of his life on that fateful Sunday, -January 22, 1905, when thousands of workmen, -headed by Father Gapon (who subsequently proved -to be an agent provocateur in the pay of the -police), marched to the Winter Palace and clamoured -for an interview with their Emperor. Had Nicholas -II gone out entirely alone to meet the deputations, -as I feel sure his father and grandfather would have -done, I firmly believe that it would have changed -the whole course of events; but his courage failed -him. A timid Autocrat is self-condemned. Instead -of meeting their Sovereign, the crowd were -met by machine-guns. In 1912, Nicholas II had -only slept one night in Petrograd since his -accession, and the Empress had only made day visits. -Not even the Ambassadresses had seen the Empress -for six years, and there had been no Court -entertainments at all. -</p> - -<p> -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P349"></a>349}</span> -</p> - -<p> -The Imperial couple remained in perpetual -seclusion at Tsarskoe Selo. -</p> - -<p> -In my days, Alexander II was constantly to be -seen driving in the streets of Petrograd entirely -alone and unattended, without any escort whatever. -The only things that marked out his sledge were -the two splendid horses (the one in shafts, the -loose "pristashka" galloping alongside in long -traces), and the kaftan of his coachman, which -was green instead of the universal blue of public -and private carriages alike. -</p> - -<p> -The low mutterings of the coming storm were -very audible in 1912. Personally, I thought the -change would take the form of a "Palace Revolution," -so common in Russian history; <i>i.e.</i>, that -the existing Sovereign would be dethroned and -another installed in his place. -</p> - -<p> -I cannot say how thankful I am that so few of -my old friends lived to see the final collapse, and -that they were spared the agonies of witnessing -the subsequent orgies of murder, spoliation, and -lust that overwhelmed the unhappy land and -deluged it in blood. -</p> - -<p> -Horrible stories have reached us of a kindly, -white-headed old couple being imprisoned for months -in a narrow cell of the Fortress, and then being -taken out at dawn, and butchered without trial; of -a highly cultivated old lady of seventy-six being -driven from her bed by the mob, and thrust into -the bitter cold of a Petrograd street in January, -in her night-dress, and there clubbed to death in -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P350"></a>350}</span> -the snow. God grant that these stories may be untrue; -the evidence, though, is terribly circumstantial, -and from Russia comes only an ominous silence. -</p> - -<p> -If I am asked what will be the eventual outcome -in Russia, I hazard no prophecies. The strong vein -of fatalism in the Russian character must be taken -into consideration, also the curious lack of initiative. -They are a people who revel in endless futile -talk, and love to get drunk on words and phrases. -Eighty per cent. of the population are grossly -ignorant peasants, living in isolated communities, -and I fail to see how they can take any combined -action. It must be remembered that, with the -exception of Lenin, the men who have grasped the -reins of power are not Russians, but Jews, mainly of -German or Polish origin. They do not, therefore, -share the fatal inertness of the Russian temperament. -</p> - -<p> -I started with the idea of giving some description -of a state of things which has, perhaps, vanished -for all time from what were five years ago the -three great Empires of Eastern Europe. -</p> - -<p> -There is, I think, inherent in all human beings -a love of ceremonial. The great influence the -Roman and Eastern Churches exercise over their -adherents is due, I venture to say, in a great measure -to their gorgeous ceremonial. In proof of this, -I would instance lands where a severer form of -religion prevails, and where this innate love of -ceremonial finds its rest in the elaborate ritual of -Masonic and kindred bodies, since it is denied it in -ecclesiastical matters. The reason that Buddhism, -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P351"></a>351}</span> -imported from China into Japan in the sixth -century, succeeded so largely in ousting Shintoism, -the ancient national religion, was that there is -neither ritual nor ceremonial in a Shinto temple, -and the complicated ceremonies of Buddhism -supplied this curious craving in human nature, until -eventually Buddhism and Shintoism entered into a -sort of ecclesiastical partnership together. -</p> - -<p> -I have far exceeded the limits which I started -by assigning to myself and, in extenuation, can -only plead that old age is proverbially garrulous. -I am also fully conscious that I have at times strayed -far from my subject, but in excuse I can urge -that but few people have seen, in five different -continents, as much of the surface of this globe and -of its inhabitants as it has fallen to my lot to do. -Half-forgotten incidents, irrelevant it may be to -the subject in hand, crowd back to the mind, and -tempt one far afield. It is quite possible that these -bypaths of reminiscence, though interesting to the -writer, may prove wearisome to the reader, so for -them I tender my apologies. -</p> - -<p> -I have endeavoured to transfer to others pictures -which remain very clear-cut and vivid in my own -mind. I cannot tell whether I have succeeded in -doing this, and I hazard no opinion as to whether -the world is a gainer or a loser by the disappearance -of the pomp and circumstance, the glitter and -glamour of the three great Courts of Eastern -Europe. -</p> - -<p> -The curtain has been rung down, perhaps -<span class="pagenum">{<a id="P352"></a>352}</span> -definitely, on the brave show. The play is played; the -scenery set for the great spectacle is either ruined -or else wantonly destroyed; the puppets who took -part in the brilliant pageant are many of them -(God help them!) broken beyond power of -repair.—<i>Finita la commedia!</i> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><a id="index"></a></p> - -<p><span class="pagenum">{<a id="P355"></a>355}</span></p> - -<h3> -INDEX -</h3> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -A -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Abdurrahman Khan, <a href="#P316">316</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -A deaf diplomat, <a href="#P32">32</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Aehrenthal, Baron von, <a href="#P306">306</a>, - -<a href="#P308">308</a>, <a href="#P309">309</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Agra Palace, India, <a href="#P186">186</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -A journalist outwitted, <a href="#P310">310</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Akbar, <a href="#P186">186</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Albuquerque, <a href="#P237">237</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Alexander II, <a href="#P116">116</a>; attempted -assassination of, in 1880, -<a href="#P125">125</a>, assassination of, <a href="#P157">157</a> -<i>sqq.</i>; sorrow of the people -for, <a href="#P159">159</a>; funeral of, <a href="#P159">159</a> -<i>sqq.</i>; King Edward and -Queen Alexandra at, <a href="#P162">162</a>, -<a href="#P208">208</a>, <a href="#P349">349</a>. -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Alexander III, Order of the -Garter conferred on, <a href="#P162">162</a> -<i>sqq.</i>; precautions for safety -of, <a href="#P164">164</a>, <a href="#P189">189</a>. -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Alexandra Colony, <a href="#P269">269</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ali Pasha and the Congress of -Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66</a>. -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Alsace, <a href="#P15">15</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ampthill, Lady, <a href="#P27">27</a>; saves the -life of William II, <a href="#P73">73</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ampthill, Lord, <a href="#P26">26</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Andrassy, Count, and the -Congress of Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -An embarrassing situation, <a href="#P114">114</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -An exclusive Court, <a href="#P63">63</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Arabi Pasha, <a href="#P201">201</a>, <a href="#P204">204</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Argentine girls, beauty of, <a href="#P260">260</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Aristocratic waitresses, <a href="#P24">24-25</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Arisugawa, Prince, <a href="#P336">336</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Arisugawa, Princess, <a href="#P336">336</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Asuncion, <a href="#P276">276</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Augusta, Empress, <a href="#P34">34</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Austria, disappearance of the -Court, <a href="#P13">13</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Austrian aristocracy, -characteristics of, <a href="#P49">49</a>; -interrelationship of, <a href="#P50">50</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Austrian diplomat, a deaf, <a href="#P32">32</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Awkward predicament, an, <a href="#P137">137-138</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -B -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bahia, <a href="#P240">240</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Barmecides' feast, a, <a href="#P25">25</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bay of Chaleurs, <a href="#P300">300</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Beaconsfield, Lord, and the -Congress of Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66</a>, <a href="#P67">67</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bear hunt in Russia, a, <a href="#P139">139-141</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Beauharnais, Countess Zena, <a href="#P179">179</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Beethoven, <a href="#P59">59</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bieloselskaya, Princess, <a href="#P179">179</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bismarck, <a href="#P16">16</a> <i>sqq.</i>, <a href="#P27">27</a>, <a href="#P28">28</a>; on -male and female nations, <a href="#P28">28</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bismarck, Count Herbert, <a href="#P30">30</a>, -<a href="#P39">39</a>, <a href="#P308">308</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Biting-fish in South America, -<a href="#P274">274</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Blessing of the Neva, the, <a href="#P122">122</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Blowitz, M. de, <a href="#P68">68</a>, <a href="#P69">69</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Botanic Gardens at Rio de -Janeiro, the, <a href="#P245">245</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Brazil, <a href="#P238">238</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -British Minister, a, in Carnival -time, <a href="#P250">250</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Broadminded Scots parents, -<a href="#P111">111</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Buckingham Palace and Berlin -Schloss compared, <a href="#P39">39-40</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Buenos Ayres, <a href="#P248">248</a> <i>sqq.</i>; -carnival at, <a href="#P250">250</a>; masked balls -in, <a href="#P255">255</a>; sport in, <a href="#P264">264</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Bulow, Hans von, <a href="#P26">26</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -C -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Calcutta, the Maidan at, <a href="#P321">321</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Camp," the, Buenos Ayres, -<a href="#P249">249</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Campbell, Colonel, <a href="#P234">234</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Canada, <a href="#P300">300</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Carnival at Buenos Ayres, the, -<a href="#P249">249</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Cathedrals, three famous Moscow, <a href="#P183">183</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Carolath-Beuthen, Princess, <a href="#P39">39</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Catherine the Great, <a href="#P192">192</a>; and -the violet in Tsarskoe Park, -<a href="#P194">194</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Charlemagne, <a href="#P50">50</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Cintra, <a href="#P235">235</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Circus in Lisbon, <a href="#P221">221</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Circus performer who became a -Bishop, <a href="#P225">225-226</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Classification of nationalities, -Bismarck's, <a href="#P28">28</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Clown, the author's personal -experience as a, <a href="#P223">223</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Commercial Court Chamberlain, a, <a href="#P243">243</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Congress of 1878, the, in -Berlin, <a href="#P66">66</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Connaught, Duchess of, <a href="#P43">43</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Conversational difficulties, <a href="#P43">43-47</a>, <a href="#P166">166</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Court beauties, <a href="#P39">39</a>, <a href="#P179">179</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Courting in Portugal, a curious -custom, <a href="#P217">217</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Croissants"--Viennese roll, -origin of, <a href="#P57">57</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Crown Prince, <a href="#P79">79</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Culinary curiosities in Japan, -<a href="#P318">318-319</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Curious sporting incidents, <a href="#P145">145</a> -<i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -D -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Darwin, <a href="#P257">257</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dawn in a Finnish forest, -<a href="#P174">174</a> <i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Deaf and dumb people," <a href="#P134">134</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Deference paid to Austrian -Archdukes, <a href="#P63">63</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Delyanoff, M., Minister of -Education, <a href="#P127">127</a>; curious -obsequies of, <a href="#P127">127-129</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Delyanoff, Mme., <a href="#P127">127</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dentist, a polite, <a href="#P205">205-206</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Depreciated currency in the -Argentine, <a href="#P275">275</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -De Reszke, Edouard, <a href="#P220">220</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -De Reszke, Jean, <a href="#P220">220</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -De Reszke, Mlle., <a href="#P220">220</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Diaz, <a href="#P237">237</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dolgorouki, Prince Alexander, -<a href="#P180">180</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dolgorouki, Princess Kitty, <a href="#P179">179</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dolgorouki, Princess Mary, -<a href="#P179">179</a>, <a href="#P180">180</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dom Fernando, <a href="#P212">212</a>, <a href="#P213">213</a>, -<a href="#P235">235</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dom Luiz, <a href="#P212">212-213</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dom Pedro, Emperor of -Brazil, <a href="#P243">243-244-245-246</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Doré, Gustave, <a href="#P234">234-235</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dowdeswell, Admiral, <a href="#P231">231</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Drunkenness in Russia, <a href="#P141">141-142</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Duc de Croy, the, a Belgian -and an Austrian subject, -<a href="#P53">53</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dué, M., Swedish Minister to -Russia, <a href="#P128">128</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dufferin, Marchioness of, <a href="#P88">88-89</a>, -<a href="#P129">129</a>, <a href="#P139">139</a>, <a href="#P154">154</a>, <a href="#P159">159</a>, <a href="#P160">160</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Dufferin, Marquis of, Ambassador -to Petrograd, <a href="#P88">88</a> <i>sqq.</i>, -<a href="#P128">128</a>, <a href="#P129">129</a>, <a href="#P153">153</a>; his diplomatic -methods, <a href="#P156">156-157-310</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -E -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Easter Supper in Russia, the, -<a href="#P109">109</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Easy-going Austria, <a href="#P49">49</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Edinburgh, Duchess of, <a href="#P125">125</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Edinburgh, Duke of, <a href="#P123">123</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Elector of Brandenburg, <a href="#P52">52</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Emperor Frederick, <a href="#P34">34</a>, <a href="#P79">79</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Emperor William I, <a href="#P32">32-33</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Empress Marie, <a href="#P208">208</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Empress Elisabeth, <a href="#P63">63-64</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Empress Frederick, <a href="#P33">33</a>, <a href="#P79">79</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -England, "Junker" Party's -hostility to, <a href="#P20">20</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Environs of Berlin, <a href="#P70">70</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -European Courts, disappearance of, <a href="#P13">13</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Exciting salmon fishing, <a href="#P166">166-167</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Expensive entertainment, an, -<a href="#P153">153</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Exquisite Russian church -music, <a href="#P92">92</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Extradition Treaty between -Great Britain and Paraguay, -<a href="#P204">204</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -F -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ferdinand of Saxe-Coburg, -Prince, <a href="#P212">212</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Finland, <a href="#P164">164-165</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Footman as entomologist, the, -<a href="#P246">246-247</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Formosa, <a href="#P277">277</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Fortress Church, Petrograd, -<a href="#P89">89</a>, <a href="#P90">90</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Francis II, last of the Holy -Roman Emperors, <a href="#P50">50-51</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Franz Josef of Austria, <a href="#P52">52</a>, <a href="#P308">308</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Frederick Charles of Prussia, -Princess, <a href="#P34">34</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Frederick Count of Hohenzollern, <a href="#P52">52</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Frederick the Great, <a href="#P27">27</a>, <a href="#P36">36</a>, -<a href="#P74">74-75</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Frederick William I, <a href="#P74">74</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -French Ambassador's ball at -Moscow, unusual incident at, -<a href="#P190">190-191</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -G -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gapon, Father, <a href="#P348">348</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gargantuan dinner, a, <a href="#P187">187-188</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gatchina Palace, <a href="#P208">208</a>; children's -play-room at, <a href="#P209">209-210</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -George V, <a href="#P186">186</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -German "door-politeness," <a href="#P219">219</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Germany, disappearance of the -Court, <a href="#P13">13</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Germany, music in, <a href="#P22">22-23</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ghika, Prince, Roumanian -Minister to Russia, <a href="#P128">128</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Giers, M. de, Russian Minister -for Foreign Affairs, <a href="#P103">103</a>, -<a href="#P202">202</a>, <a href="#P203">203</a>, <a href="#P204">204</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gigantic Court Pages, <a href="#P40">40</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gonçalves, <a href="#P241">241</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gortchakoff, Prince, and the -Congress of Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66</a>, -<a href="#P67">67</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gourmet, an ecclesiastical, <a href="#P41">41-45</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gran Chaco, the, <a href="#P268">268</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Groote Constantia, <a href="#P197">197</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Gulf between Russian nobility -and peasants, <a href="#P147">147</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -> -H -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Harraka Niska, <a href="#P164">164</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Henry the Navigator, Prince, -<a href="#P237">237</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Hilarious funeral, a, <a href="#P127">127-128</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Hohenzollerns ever a grasping -race, <a href="#P52">52</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Holy Roman Emperor," the, -<a href="#P50">50</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Hooveny M. van der, Netherlands -Minister to Russia, -<a href="#P128">128</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Howard, Dick, <a href="#P207">207</a>, <a href="#P281">281</a>, <a href="#P285">285</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Humbert, King, <a href="#P326">326</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Hungary, invasion of, by the -Turks in 1683, <a href="#P56">56</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -> -I -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ice-boating on the Gulf of Finland, <a href="#P176">176</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -India, <a href="#P186">186</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Indoor games, Russians' love -for, <a href="#P177">177</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Inelegant palaces, <a href="#P75">75</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Inquisitive peasant, an, <a href="#P135">135</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Intelligenzia," the, <a href="#P104">104</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Irritating customs in Vienna, -<a href="#P54">54-55</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ismail, Khedive of Egypt, <a href="#P201">201</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ivan III, <a href="#P184">184</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -J -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Japan, <a href="#P317">317-330</a>, <a href="#P343">343</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Japanese advertising, <a href="#P338">338</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Japanese politeness, <a href="#P334">334</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Jardine, Captain, <a href="#P284">284</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Jena, <a href="#P16">16</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Jomini, Baron, <a href="#P103">103</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Junker" Party, hostility of, -towards England, <a href="#P20">20</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -K -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Karolyi, Countess, Austrian -Ambassadress in Berlin, <a href="#P38">38</a>, -<a href="#P63">63</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Katheodory Pasha and the -Congress of Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Kiderlin-Waechter, Baron von, -<a href="#P306">306-307</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -King Edward attends -Alexander II's funeral, <a href="#P162">162</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -King of Prussia proclaimed -German Emperor at Versailles, <a href="#P15">15</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Kingsley, Charles, <a href="#P345">345</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Klepsch, Colonel, <a href="#P309">309</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Koltesha, <a href="#P167">167-168-169</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Koltesba, shooting at, <a href="#P168">168</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Königgrätz, <a href="#P15">15</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Kremlin, the, <a href="#P182">182</a> <i>sqq.</i>; the -Great Palace, <a href="#P185">185</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Kyoto, the Emperor's palace, -<a href="#P321">321</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -L -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ladies' unchangeable Court -fashions in Russia, <a href="#P117">117</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lapp encampment on the Neva, -<a href="#P112">112-113</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lawson, Sir Wilfrid, <a href="#P307">307</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lazareff and the great Orloff -diamond, <a href="#P124">124</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Leopold I, <a href="#P52">52</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Les Bals des Palmiers," <a href="#P120">120</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Leuchtenberg, Duchess of, <i>see</i> -Beauharnais -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Liebknecht, Herr, <a href="#P29">29</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lisbon, <a href="#P211">211</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lisbon, beauty of, <a href="#P229">229</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lister, Lord, <a href="#P192">192</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Liszt, <a href="#P26">26</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lobkowitz Palace, <a href="#P59">59</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lobkowitz, Prince, <a href="#P59">59</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lopez, Francisco, <a href="#P277">277</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lorraine, <a href="#P15">15</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Louis XIV, <a href="#P52">52</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Louis XVI, <a href="#P57">57</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Louise Margaret of Prussia, -Princess, <a href="#P43">43</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Louise, Queen, of Prussia, -<a href="#P30">30-31</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Lovendal, Count, Danish Minister -in Petrograd, <a href="#P306">306-307</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Luncheon in pyjamas, <a href="#P154">154</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Luxembourg Palace, the, <a href="#P36">36</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -M -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Making the Circle," trying -ordeal of Prussian Princesses, <a href="#P43">43</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Margherita, Queen, <a href="#P326">326</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Maria II, Queen, <a href="#P212">212</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Marie Antoinette, <a href="#P57">57</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Mendelssohn, <a href="#P31">31</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Midnight drive, an exciting, -<a href="#P150">150-151</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Militarism in Germany, <a href="#P15">15</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Misguided midshipmen, <a href="#P231">231-232</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Mitsu, Count, <a href="#P333">333</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Mitsu, Countess, <a href="#P334">334</a>, <a href="#P337">337</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Moltke, Field-Marshal von, <a href="#P30">30</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Montebello, Comte de, French -Ambassador, <a href="#P189">189-190</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Montebello, Comtesse de, <a href="#P189">189</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Montferrand, M., Architect of -St. Isaac's, Petrograd, <a href="#P91">91</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Moscow, beauty of, <a href="#P181">181-182</a> -<i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Moscow cathedrals, three famous, <a href="#P183">183</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Moscow, Imperial Treasury at, -splendour of, <a href="#P184">184</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Music, Germans as lovers of, -<a href="#P22">22</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Musical chairs" in Japan, <a href="#P319">319</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -N -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Napoleon I, <a href="#P16">16</a>; coronation of, -<a href="#P50">50-51</a>; bribes electors of -Bavaria, Württemberg, and -Saxony, <a href="#P51">51</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Napoleon III," <a href="#P36">36-37</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Narrow escape from drowning -of William II, <a href="#P73">73</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Natural beauties of Brazil, -<a href="#P246">246</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Neva, blessing of the, <a href="#P121">121</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Newspaper enterprise, <a href="#P316">316</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Nicholas I, <a href="#P185">185-194</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Nicholas II, <a href="#P158">158</a>, <a href="#P189">189</a>, <a href="#P347">347</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Nihilist friends, <a href="#P104">104</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Nikko river, Japan, <a href="#P331">331</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Nondescript waiters, <a href="#P184">184</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Novel form of sport, a, <a href="#P171">171-172</a> <i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -O -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Old Schloss, Berlin, <a href="#P34">34-35</a>; -comparison with Buckingham Palace, <a href="#P39">39-40</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Opera in Lisbon, <a href="#P221">221</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Organ Mountains, the, <a href="#P245">245</a>, -<a href="#P248">248</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Oriental traits in Russian character, <a href="#P101">101</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Orloff diamond, the, <a href="#P124">124</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -P -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Paget, Sir Augustus, <a href="#P327">327</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Palaeologus, Sophia, wife of -Ivan III, <a href="#P184">184</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Paraguay, <a href="#P276">276</a> <i>sqq.</i>; Extradition -Treaty between Great -Britain and, <a href="#P204">204</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Paraguayan race meeting, a, -<a href="#P281">281</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Paraguayan women, attractive, -<a href="#P282">282</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Parana river, the, <a href="#P277">277</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Patiño Cué, <a href="#P285">285</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Peace Congress between Russia -and Turkey in Berlin, -1878, <a href="#P66">66</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Peasant's house in Russia, a, -<a href="#P131">131-132</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Pernambuco, <a href="#P240">240</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Peter the Great, <a href="#P51">51</a>, <a href="#P95">95</a>, <a href="#P102">102-103</a> <i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Peterhof, <a href="#P196">196</a>; its charming -park, <a href="#P197">197</a>; a plethora of -palaces round, <a href="#P198">198</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Petrograd, transference to, <a href="#P76">76</a>; -a disappointing capital, <a href="#P86">86</a>; -English Embassy at, <a href="#P89">89</a>; -Palace ball, <a href="#P119">119</a>; balls at, -peculiarities of, <a href="#P178">178</a>; famous -Society beauties of, <a href="#P179">179</a>; -inclement climate of, <a href="#P193">193</a>; -revisited, <a href="#P340">340</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Petropolis, diversions at, <a href="#P245">245-246</a>, <a href="#P248">248</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Pombal, Marquis de, <a href="#P230">230</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Portugal, two Kings of, <a href="#P212">212</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Portuguese bull-fights, bloodless, -<a href="#P214">214</a> <i>sqq.</i>; comparison of -with Spanish, <a href="#P216">216</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Portuguese coinage, <a href="#P228">228</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Portuguese politeness, <a href="#P220">220</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Potemkin, <a href="#P343">343</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Potsdam, <a href="#P71">71-72</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Potsdam Palaces, <a href="#P74">74-75</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Prussian militarism, <a href="#P15">15</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Prussian Princesses, a trying -ordeal, <a href="#P43">43</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Princesse Château," <a href="#P95">95</a> <i>sqq.</i>, -<a href="#P180">180</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Pugnacious Court Pages, <a href="#P40">40-41</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -Q -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Quebec, <a href="#P300">300</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Queen Alexandra attends -Alexander II's funeral, <a href="#P162">162</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Queen Victoria, queenly dignity -of, <a href="#P116">116</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Queen Victoria confers Order -of the Garter on Alexander -III, <a href="#P162">162</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Quirinal at Rome, the, <a href="#P14">14</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -R -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Radziwill, Princess William, <a href="#P39">39</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Rag-time" and Rubinstein, <a href="#P25">25-26</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Rasputin, <a href="#P348">348</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Rauch, <a href="#P31">31</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Red-bearded priest, the, <a href="#P110">110</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Richter, Gustav, <a href="#P30">30</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Richter, Mme., <a href="#P31">31</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -River Plate, the, <a href="#P299">299</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Ring," the, in Berlin, <a href="#P23">23</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Rio de Janeiro, beauty of, <a href="#P240">240</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Rome, the Quirinal, <a href="#P14">14</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Rubinstein and "Rag-time," <a href="#P25">25-26</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russia, disappearance of the -Court, <a href="#P13">13</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russia and Turkey, Peace -Congress in Berlin, <a href="#P66">66</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian frontier police, <a href="#P84">84</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian gipsies, <a href="#P149">149-150</a>; their -fascinating singing, <a href="#P151">151-152</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian illusions, <a href="#P198">198-199</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian Imperial Yacht Club, -the, <a href="#P100">100</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian ladies' unchangeable -Court fashions, <a href="#P117">117</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian language, difficulties -exaggerated, <a href="#P94">94</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian limitations, <a href="#P102">102</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian police, <a href="#P77">77</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russian village habits, <a href="#P146">146</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Russians really Orientals, <a href="#P101">101</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -S -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Sadowa, <a href="#P15">15</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -St. Isaac's church, Petrograd, -<a href="#P91">91</a>; midnight Easter Mass -at, <a href="#P105">105</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Salisbury, Lord, and the Congress -of Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66-69</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Scandalized governess, a, <a href="#P155">155</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Schleinitz, Mme. de, <a href="#P25">25</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Schlüssel-Geld," an unpopular tax, <a href="#P55">55</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Schouvaloff, Count Peter, and -the Peace Congress in Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P66">66</a>; <a href="#P180">180</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Schouvaloff, Countess Betsy, -<a href="#P179">179-180</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Secret Police in Russia, the, <a href="#P99">99</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Seven Weeks' War, the, <a href="#P15">15</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Shah Jehan, <a href="#P186">186-196</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Shennan, Mr. David, <a href="#P261">261-262</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Sigismund, <a href="#P52">52</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ski-ing, <a href="#P168">168</a> <i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Skobeleff, General, <a href="#P179">179</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Slovenly Russian uniforms, <a href="#P118">118</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Sobieski, John, King of Poland, -routs the Turks, <a href="#P56">56</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Spanish and Portuguese bull-fights, -difference between, -<a href="#P216">216</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Sport in Russia, <a href="#P128">128-129</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Strauss, Johann, <a href="#P58">58</a>; an exacting -conductor, <a href="#P59">59</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -"Street of toleration," the, <a href="#P126">126</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Strousberg, Herr, railway magnate, <a href="#P31">31</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Stürmer, M., destroyer of the -Russian Empire, <a href="#P158">158</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Sullivan, Sir Arthur, in Petrograd, <a href="#P93">93</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -T -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Talleyrand, <a href="#P50">50</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tel-el-Kebir, <a href="#P204">204</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tetschen, <a href="#P48">48</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Teutonic Knights, the, <a href="#P16">16</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tewfik, <a href="#P201">201</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tigre, the, <a href="#P299">299</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Toboganning in Finland, <a href="#P174">174-175</a> <i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tokugawa dynasty, <a href="#P320">320</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tokyo, <a href="#P317">317</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tokyo, Uyeno Park at, <a href="#P325">325</a>; -<a href="#P332">332</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Trinidad, <a href="#P345">345</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tsarskoe Park, curiosities in, -<a href="#P193">193</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Tsarskoe Selo, <a href="#P191">191</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Turkey and Russia, Peace -Congress in Berlin, <a href="#P66">66</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Turks, invasion of Hungary, -by, in 1683, <a href="#P56">56</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Turks routed by John Sobieski -in 1683, <a href="#P56">56</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -U -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Ultimatum to Russia, a young -man's, <a href="#P202">202</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Unusual occupants of a palace, -<a href="#P126">126</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Urbain, the cook, <a href="#P42">42</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -V -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Van der Stell, Governor, <a href="#P197">197</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Vasco de Gama, <a href="#P237">237</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Victoria, Queen, <a href="#P42">42</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Victor Emmanuel, <a href="#P14">14</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Vienna, <a href="#P48">48</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Vienna, delightful environs of, -<a href="#P64">64</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Viennese Court entertainments, -<a href="#P62">62</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Viennese orchestras, <a href="#P55">55</a> <i>sq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Viennese restaurants and -orchestras, excellence of, <a href="#P55">55</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Viennese women, comeliness of, -<a href="#P57">57</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Villages in Russia, similarity -of, <a href="#P131">131-132</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Vladimir, Grand Duke and -death of Alexander II, <a href="#P159">159</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -W -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Waddington, M., and the -Congress of Berlin, 1878, <a href="#P67">67</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Wagner, the "Ring" in -Berlin, <a href="#P23">23-24</a>, <a href="#P25">25</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Waitresses, aristocratic, <a href="#P24">24-25</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Water-throwing at Buenos -Ayres Carnival, <a href="#P249">249</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Wends, the, <a href="#P16">16</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -William IV, <a href="#P72">72</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Winter Palace, Petrograd, the, -<a href="#P114">114-122</a> <i>sqq.</i> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Wolseley, Sir Garnet, <a href="#P204">204</a> -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Wolves as fellow travelers, -<a href="#P131">131</a> -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<p class="t3b"> -Y -</p> - -<p class="index"> -Yellow fever at Rio de Janeiro, -<a href="#P241">241-242-243</a> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> - - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Vanished Pomps of Yesterday, by -Frederic Hamilton - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE VANISHED POMPS OF YESTERDAY *** - -***** This file should be named 60901-h.htm or 60901-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/0/9/0/60901/ - -Produced by Al Haines -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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