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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #66290 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/66290)
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Scandalized Martians, by Arnold Marmor
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: The Scandalized Martians
-
-Author: Arnold Marmor
-
-Release Date: September 13, 2021 [eBook #66290]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed
- Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCANDALIZED MARTIANS ***
-
-
-
-
- The Scandalized Martians
-
- By Arnold Marmor
-
- David Fry wanted to make an epic movie in
- the realistic school. The trouble was, his ideas
- wouldn't pass the censors--here or anyplace else!
-
- [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
- Imagination Stories of Science and Fantasy
- June 1954
- Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
- the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]
-
-
-David Fry was a realist. And also slightly crazy. Maybe that helped in
-this buggy business but David Fry overdid it. "I want her nude," he
-screamed. "Naked."
-
-"Impossible," I informed him as calmly as I could.
-
-"Naked," he bellowed.
-
-"The Breen office won't allow it and you know it."
-
-"I defy them. Those radicals! It'll be my most realistic picture. A
-milestone in film making."
-
-"It won't get the seal of approval."
-
-"So what? I don't need it."
-
-"Every state will ban it."
-
-"Nevada won't ban it."
-
-"Besides, you couldn't get Harriet Desmond to strut around in the raw."
-
-"Oh, no?"
-
-"No."
-
-"Her option comes up in three months."
-
-"So what? You're a director. You have nothing to do with it. That's
-Dwight Howard's department. Look, David, I'll have her in a slip or a
-bathing suit."
-
-"Ronnie," he said, shaking his head. "I like you. You're a writer but
-I like you anyway. I feel that the audience will get the proper impact
-only if she's naked."
-
-"It'll be an impact all right."
-
-"You write the script the way I tell you. I don't want to argue
-anymore. I like you, Ronnie."
-
-"If you want a sexy script I'll make it sexy without being lewd."
-
-"Sexy? Don't be vulgar. I want a down to earth picture like the French
-and Italians make. I want to surpass them with my realism."
-
-"David, what good would it do if I did write the scenario your way?
-The scene would never be shot."
-
-"Enough," he screamed. He clutched his chest. "I feel an attack coming
-on. Leave me. Get out."
-
- * * * * *
-
-Dwight Howard was chief production man at Silver Studios. He listened
-gravely as I spilled my heart out to him.
-
-"He's a great director," Dwight Howard said. He was a large man with
-tiny ears, liquid blue eyes, and the cigars he smoked cost a buck a
-stogie.
-
-"Sure," I said. "A great goofy director. He's nuts just like all
-directors."
-
-He grinned at me. "Directors believe all writers are crazy and writers
-believe all directors are crazy."
-
-"You want me to write the script his way? You want that scene shot with
-Harriet Desmond nude?"
-
-"No, no. Of course not. The whole idea is too ridiculous for words." He
-sighed. "I'll have a talk with him."
-
-David Fry resigned the following day. Tortured and abused actors and
-actresses celebrated for three days and three nights. Dwight Howard
-didn't have to accept the resignation as Fry was bound to Silver
-Studios by an iron clad contract. But a director's work gets sloppy if
-his heart isn't in it. So out went David Fry, the realist.
-
-Nobody in Hollywood heard from Fry in seven months. And nobody seemed
-to care.
-
-One night, as I came home from a party, I was greeted by the screaming
-of the telephone. I held the receiver to my ear. "Maternity hospital,"
-I said.
-
-"Ronnie." It was David Fry.
-
-"Oh. Hello. How's everything?"
-
-"Fine. Great. I've got to see you."
-
-"Well...."
-
-"I'll hop right over."
-
-He hung up and I sighed. I built myself a solid drink and got
-comfortable.
-
-He showed up twenty minutes later. He was thinner, more nervous than
-before.
-
-He flopped on a divan. "You wouldn't believe it," he said.
-
-"Believe what?"
-
-"I want to do a picture. A science picture about a trip to Mars."
-
-"It's been done. And more than once."
-
-"With real Martians?"
-
-I blinked. "I'll get you a drink."
-
-"No. I want a clear head. Hear me out. I've met them."
-
-"Who?"
-
-"Martians. A whole gang of them. Real honest to goodness Martians. It's
-fantastic. But it's true. They landed in the San Fernando Valley."
-
-"That figures."
-
-"I've got my home there. They asked for directions to Hollywood. You
-know what? They came to revolutionize the industry."
-
-"Maybe they're Commies?"
-
-"You should see their equipment. Fantastic. I talked them into staying
-over at my place. They dismantled their ship and have it stored away. I
-want you to do the screen play. It'll be great."
-
-"They... er... weren't detected flying over?"
-
-"They use an anti-radar beam."
-
-"Oh."
-
-"They can speak every language under the sun."
-
-"Look, David. I'm tired and I want to go to bed. So be nice and go
-sober up."
-
-"You don't believe me?"
-
-"No. In plain language, no."
-
-He extracted a square shaped box from a pocket. "See this gadget? I can
-make myself disappear."
-
-"Do that."
-
-And he did.
-
-"Yow!" I screamed.
-
-He reappeared.
-
-I staggered to the liquor cabinet and made myself a double triple
-whiskey and soda.
-
-"Well?" There was a look of triumph on his face.
-
-"They give you that?"
-
-"A present."
-
-"I've got nothing doing for a week. I'll be there tomorrow morning."
-
-"No. Tonight. You're liable to blab about it."
-
-"Don't you trust me?"
-
-"No. I know you went to see Dwight Howard about me."
-
-"Then why do you want me to write the story?"
-
-"I feel you owe me that. You're honest in some ways. Well?"
-
-"Right. I'll pack a grip if I'm staying over."
-
-"Do that. I've got my car downstairs."
-
- * * * * *
-
-David Fry's home was a Spanish-style ranch which consisted of a herd of
-cattle and horses.
-
-The Martians looked like us except they had no necks and no finger or
-toe nails. Their leader was a giant of a Martian with the name, Dooma.
-They wore slacks and sport jackets which Fry had bought for them. They
-seemed pleasant enough.
-
-I got some sleep and woke that afternoon. Dooma, Fry, and myself sat in
-the front room and talked over the story we were to do.
-
-"We can't trust anyone," Fry said, "so you and I will play the
-earthlings in it. We'll land on Mars and discover life on the planet.
-Dooma and his crew will play the Martians. Real type casting."
-
-"What about sets?" I asked.
-
-"Plenty of background on Mars," Dooma said.
-
-"What?" I exploded.
-
-"Sure," Fry said. "We'll go to Mars and shoot most of the picture
-there. Has anyone ever done that before?"
-
-"Sure," Dooma said.
-
-"I mean anyone on earth," Fry said.
-
-"I don't like it," I said.
-
-"We'll bring you back," Dooma said.
-
-"I still don't like it."
-
-"And we'll do that nude scene," Fry said. "We'll have a couple of
-Martian girls taking a bath nude."
-
-"Oh, no," Dooma said. "That's out."
-
-"But why?" Fry wanted to know.
-
-"The Martian Censors. They won't go for it."
-
-I grinned. "There too?"
-
-"But I want to film life in the raw," Fry said.
-
-Dooma shook his head. "Out of the question."
-
-"We'll do it my way," Fry snarled, "or we won't do it at all."
-
-Dooma stood up. "Well if that's the way you feel about--"
-
-"Now wait a minute," I said. "Hold on. David, we've got a great thing
-here. Don't mess it up."
-
-"I'm the director," Fry screamed. "Nobody is going to tell me my
-business."
-
-"Is everybody in Hollywood like him?" Dooma asked me.
-
-"Some of them are worse."
-
-"I realize we made a grave mistake."
-
-"I made the mistake of taking you into my home," Fry shouted. "I
-treated you like human beings. And this is the thanks I get."
-
-"I won't hear another word." Dooma turned and marched out.
-
-"Now see what you've done?" I was as mad as a wet hen.
-
-"What have I done? All I wanted to do was make a great picture."
-
-"You insulted him. Why, he's liable to go back to Mars and talk them
-into invading us."
-
-"That idiot. What does he know about making pictures?"
-
-Activity brought me to the window. I looked out and saw the Martians
-putting their ship together.
-
-Fry came up behind me.
-
-The ship blasted off and the Martians went back home.
-
-"They were hammy actors anyway," Fry rationalized.
-
-*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCANDALIZED MARTIANS ***
-
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-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: The Scandalized Martians</p>
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-<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Arnold Marmor</div>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: September 13, 2021 [eBook #66290]</div>
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-
-<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCANDALIZED MARTIANS ***</div>
-
-<div class="titlepage">
-
-<h1>The Scandalized Martians</h1>
-
-<h2>By Arnold Marmor</h2>
-
-<p>David Fry wanted to make an epic movie in<br />
-the realistic school. The trouble was, his ideas<br />
-wouldn't pass the censors&mdash;here or anyplace else!</p>
-
-<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br />
-Imagination Stories of Science and Fantasy<br />
-June 1954<br />
-Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br />
-the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap" />
-
-<p>David Fry was a realist. And also slightly crazy. Maybe that helped in
-this buggy business but David Fry overdid it. "I want her nude," he
-screamed. "Naked."</p>
-
-<p>"Impossible," I informed him as calmly as I could.</p>
-
-<p>"Naked," he bellowed.</p>
-
-<p>"The Breen office won't allow it and you know it."</p>
-
-<p>"I defy them. Those radicals! It'll be my most realistic picture. A
-milestone in film making."</p>
-
-<p>"It won't get the seal of approval."</p>
-
-<p>"So what? I don't need it."</p>
-
-<p>"Every state will ban it."</p>
-
-<p>"Nevada won't ban it."</p>
-
-<p>"Besides, you couldn't get Harriet Desmond to strut around in the raw."</p>
-
-<p>"Oh, no?"</p>
-
-<p>"No."</p>
-
-<p>"Her option comes up in three months."</p>
-
-<p>"So what? You're a director. You have nothing to do with it. That's
-Dwight Howard's department. Look, David, I'll have her in a slip or a
-bathing suit."</p>
-
-<p>"Ronnie," he said, shaking his head. "I like you. You're a writer but
-I like you anyway. I feel that the audience will get the proper impact
-only if she's naked."</p>
-
-<p>"It'll be an impact all right."</p>
-
-<p>"You write the script the way I tell you. I don't want to argue
-anymore. I like you, Ronnie."</p>
-
-<p>"If you want a sexy script I'll make it sexy without being lewd."</p>
-
-<p>"Sexy? Don't be vulgar. I want a down to earth picture like the French
-and Italians make. I want to surpass them with my realism."</p>
-
-<p>"David, what good would it do if I did write the scenario your way?
-The scene would never be shot."</p>
-
-<p>"Enough," he screamed. He clutched his chest. "I feel an attack coming
-on. Leave me. Get out."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>Dwight Howard was chief production man at Silver Studios. He listened
-gravely as I spilled my heart out to him.</p>
-
-<p>"He's a great director," Dwight Howard said. He was a large man with
-tiny ears, liquid blue eyes, and the cigars he smoked cost a buck a
-stogie.</p>
-
-<p>"Sure," I said. "A great goofy director. He's nuts just like all
-directors."</p>
-
-<p>He grinned at me. "Directors believe all writers are crazy and writers
-believe all directors are crazy."</p>
-
-<p>"You want me to write the script his way? You want that scene shot with
-Harriet Desmond nude?"</p>
-
-<p>"No, no. Of course not. The whole idea is too ridiculous for words." He
-sighed. "I'll have a talk with him."</p>
-
-<p>David Fry resigned the following day. Tortured and abused actors and
-actresses celebrated for three days and three nights. Dwight Howard
-didn't have to accept the resignation as Fry was bound to Silver
-Studios by an iron clad contract. But a director's work gets sloppy if
-his heart isn't in it. So out went David Fry, the realist.</p>
-
-<p>Nobody in Hollywood heard from Fry in seven months. And nobody seemed
-to care.</p>
-
-<p>One night, as I came home from a party, I was greeted by the screaming
-of the telephone. I held the receiver to my ear. "Maternity hospital,"
-I said.</p>
-
-<p>"Ronnie." It was David Fry.</p>
-
-<p>"Oh. Hello. How's everything?"</p>
-
-<p>"Fine. Great. I've got to see you."</p>
-
-<p>"Well...."</p>
-
-<p>"I'll hop right over."</p>
-
-<p>He hung up and I sighed. I built myself a solid drink and got
-comfortable.</p>
-
-<p>He showed up twenty minutes later. He was thinner, more nervous than
-before.</p>
-
-<p>He flopped on a divan. "You wouldn't believe it," he said.</p>
-
-<p>"Believe what?"</p>
-
-<p>"I want to do a picture. A science picture about a trip to Mars."</p>
-
-<p>"It's been done. And more than once."</p>
-
-<p>"With real Martians?"</p>
-
-<p>I blinked. "I'll get you a drink."</p>
-
-<p>"No. I want a clear head. Hear me out. I've met them."</p>
-
-<p>"Who?"</p>
-
-<p>"Martians. A whole gang of them. Real honest to goodness Martians. It's
-fantastic. But it's true. They landed in the San Fernando Valley."</p>
-
-<p>"That figures."</p>
-
-<p>"I've got my home there. They asked for directions to Hollywood. You
-know what? They came to revolutionize the industry."</p>
-
-<p>"Maybe they're Commies?"</p>
-
-<p>"You should see their equipment. Fantastic. I talked them into staying
-over at my place. They dismantled their ship and have it stored away. I
-want you to do the screen play. It'll be great."</p>
-
-<p>"They... er... weren't detected flying over?"</p>
-
-<p>"They use an anti-radar beam."</p>
-
-<p>"Oh."</p>
-
-<p>"They can speak every language under the sun."</p>
-
-<p>"Look, David. I'm tired and I want to go to bed. So be nice and go
-sober up."</p>
-
-<p>"You don't believe me?"</p>
-
-<p>"No. In plain language, no."</p>
-
-<p>He extracted a square shaped box from a pocket. "See this gadget? I can
-make myself disappear."</p>
-
-<p>"Do that."</p>
-
-<p>And he did.</p>
-
-<p>"Yow!" I screamed.</p>
-
-<p>He reappeared.</p>
-
-<p>I staggered to the liquor cabinet and made myself a double triple
-whiskey and soda.</p>
-
-<p>"Well?" There was a look of triumph on his face.</p>
-
-<p>"They give you that?"</p>
-
-<p>"A present."</p>
-
-<p>"I've got nothing doing for a week. I'll be there tomorrow morning."</p>
-
-<p>"No. Tonight. You're liable to blab about it."</p>
-
-<p>"Don't you trust me?"</p>
-
-<p>"No. I know you went to see Dwight Howard about me."</p>
-
-<p>"Then why do you want me to write the story?"</p>
-
-<p>"I feel you owe me that. You're honest in some ways. Well?"</p>
-
-<p>"Right. I'll pack a grip if I'm staying over."</p>
-
-<p>"Do that. I've got my car downstairs."</p>
-
-<hr class="tb" />
-
-<p>David Fry's home was a Spanish-style ranch which consisted of a herd of
-cattle and horses.</p>
-
-<p>The Martians looked like us except they had no necks and no finger or
-toe nails. Their leader was a giant of a Martian with the name, Dooma.
-They wore slacks and sport jackets which Fry had bought for them. They
-seemed pleasant enough.</p>
-
-<p>I got some sleep and woke that afternoon. Dooma, Fry, and myself sat in
-the front room and talked over the story we were to do.</p>
-
-<p>"We can't trust anyone," Fry said, "so you and I will play the
-earthlings in it. We'll land on Mars and discover life on the planet.
-Dooma and his crew will play the Martians. Real type casting."</p>
-
-<p>"What about sets?" I asked.</p>
-
-<p>"Plenty of background on Mars," Dooma said.</p>
-
-<p>"What?" I exploded.</p>
-
-<p>"Sure," Fry said. "We'll go to Mars and shoot most of the picture
-there. Has anyone ever done that before?"</p>
-
-<p>"Sure," Dooma said.</p>
-
-<p>"I mean anyone on earth," Fry said.</p>
-
-<p>"I don't like it," I said.</p>
-
-<p>"We'll bring you back," Dooma said.</p>
-
-<p>"I still don't like it."</p>
-
-<p>"And we'll do that nude scene," Fry said. "We'll have a couple of
-Martian girls taking a bath nude."</p>
-
-<p>"Oh, no," Dooma said. "That's out."</p>
-
-<p>"But why?" Fry wanted to know.</p>
-
-<p>"The Martian Censors. They won't go for it."</p>
-
-<p>I grinned. "There too?"</p>
-
-<p>"But I want to film life in the raw," Fry said.</p>
-
-<p>Dooma shook his head. "Out of the question."</p>
-
-<p>"We'll do it my way," Fry snarled, "or we won't do it at all."</p>
-
-<p>Dooma stood up. "Well if that's the way you feel about&mdash;"</p>
-
-<p>"Now wait a minute," I said. "Hold on. David, we've got a great thing
-here. Don't mess it up."</p>
-
-<p>"I'm the director," Fry screamed. "Nobody is going to tell me my
-business."</p>
-
-<p>"Is everybody in Hollywood like him?" Dooma asked me.</p>
-
-<p>"Some of them are worse."</p>
-
-<p>"I realize we made a grave mistake."</p>
-
-<p>"I made the mistake of taking you into my home," Fry shouted. "I
-treated you like human beings. And this is the thanks I get."</p>
-
-<p>"I won't hear another word." Dooma turned and marched out.</p>
-
-<p>"Now see what you've done?" I was as mad as a wet hen.</p>
-
-<p>"What have I done? All I wanted to do was make a great picture."</p>
-
-<p>"You insulted him. Why, he's liable to go back to Mars and talk them
-into invading us."</p>
-
-<p>"That idiot. What does he know about making pictures?"</p>
-
-<p>Activity brought me to the window. I looked out and saw the Martians
-putting their ship together.</p>
-
-<p>Fry came up behind me.</p>
-
-<p>The ship blasted off and the Martians went back home.</p>
-
-<p>"They were hammy actors anyway," Fry rationalized.</p>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCANDALIZED MARTIANS ***</div>
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