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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of Thoughts on the Education of
-Daughters, by Mary Wollstonecraft
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: Thoughts on the Education of Daughters
- with Reflections on Female Conduct, in The more important Duties
- of Life
-
-Author: Mary Wollstonecraft
-
-Release Date: February 21, 2022 [eBook #67466]
-
-Language: English
-
-Produced by: Richard Tonsing and the Online Distributed Proofreading
- Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from
- images generously made available by The Internet Archive)
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THOUGHTS ON THE EDUCATION OF
-DAUGHTERS ***
-
-
-
-
-
- THOUGHTS
-
- ON THE
-
- EDUCATION
-
- OF
-
- DAUGHTERS:
-
- WITH
-
- REFLECTIONS ON FEMALE CONDUCT,
-
- IN
-
- The more important DUTIES of LIFE,
-
-
- By MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
-
-
- LONDON:
- PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, N^o 72, ST. PAUL’S
- CHURCH-YARD.
-
- M DCC LXXXVII.
-
-
-
-
- PREFACE.
-
-
-In the following pages I have endeavoured to point out some important
-things with respect to female education. It is true, many treatises have
-been already written; yet it occurred to me, that much still remained to
-be said. I shall not swell these sheets by writing apologies for my
-attempt. I am afraid, indeed, the reflections will, by some, be thought
-too grave; but I could not make them less so without writing affectedly;
-yet, though they may be insipid to the gay, others may not think them
-so; and if they should prove useful to one fellow-creature, and beguile
-any hours, which sorrow has made heavy, I shall think I have not been
-employed in vain.
-
-
-
-
- CONTENTS
-
- PREFACE
- The NURSERY
- MORAL DISCIPLINE
- EXTERIOR ACCOMPLISHMENTS
- ARTIFICIAL MANNERS
- DRESS
- The FINE ARTS
- READING
- BOARDING-SCHOOLS
- The TEMPER
- Unfortunate Situation of Females, fashionably educated, and left without
- a Fortune
- LOVE
- MATRIMONY
- DESULTORY THOUGHTS
- THE BENEFITS WHICH ARISE FROM DISAPPOINTMENTS
- ON THE TREATMENT OF SERVANTS
- THE OBSERVANCE OF SUNDAY
- ON THE MISFORTUNE OF FLUCTUATING PRINCIPLES
- BENEVOLENCE
- CARD-PLAYING
- THE THEATRE
- PUBLIC PLACES
-
-
-
-
- THOUGHTS
- ON THE
-
- EDUCATION
-
- OF
-
- DAUGHTERS.
-
-
-
-
- THE NURSERY.
-
-
-As I conceive it to be the duty of every rational creature to attend to
-its offspring, I am sorry to observe, that reason and duty together have
-not so powerful an influence over human conduct, as instinct has in the
-brute creation. Indolence, and a thoughtless disregard of every thing,
-except the present indulgence, make many mothers, who may have momentary
-starts of tenderness, neglect their children. They follow a pleasing
-impulse, and never reflect that reason should cultivate and govern those
-instincts which are implanted in us to render the path of duty
-pleasant—for if they are not governed they will run wild; and strengthen
-the passions which are ever endeavouring to obtain dominion—I mean
-vanity and self-love.
-
-The first thing to be attended to, is laying the foundation of a good
-constitution. The mother (if there are not very weighty reasons to
-prevent her) ought to suckle her children. Her milk is their proper
-nutriment, and for some time is quite sufficient. Were a regular mode of
-suckling adopted, it would be far from being a laborious task. Children,
-who are left to the care of ignorant nurses, have their stomachs
-overloaded with improper food, which turns acid, and renders them very
-uncomfortable. We should be particularly careful to guard them in their
-infant state from bodily pain; as their minds can then afford them no
-amusement to alleviate it. The first years of a child’s life are
-frequently made miserable through negligence or ignorance. Their
-complaints are mostly in their stomach or bowels; and these complaints
-generally arise from the quality and quantity of their food.
-
-The suckling of a child also excites the warmest glow of tenderness—Its
-dependant, helpless state produces an affection, which may properly be
-termed maternal. I have even felt it, when I have seen a mother perform
-that office; and am of opinion, that maternal tenderness arises quite as
-much from habit as instinct. It is possible, I am convinced, to acquire
-the affection of a parent for an adopted child; it is necessary,
-therefore, for a mother to perform the office of one, in order to
-produce in herself a rational affection for her offspring.
-
-Children very early contract the manners of those about them. It is easy
-to distinguish the child of a well-bred person, if it is not left
-entirely to the nurse’s care. These women are of course ignorant, and to
-keep a child quiet for the moment, they humour all its little caprices.
-Very soon does it begin to be perverse, and eager to be gratified in
-every thing. The usual mode of acting is complying with the humours
-sometimes, and contradicting them at others—just according to the
-dictates of an uncorrected temper. This the infant finds out earlier
-than can be imagined, and it gives rise to an affection devoid of
-respect. Uniformity of conduct is the only feasible method of creating
-both. An inflexible adherence to any rule that has been laid down makes
-children comfortable, and saves the mother and nurse much trouble, as
-they will not often contest, if they have not once conquered. They will,
-I am sure, love and respect a person who treats them properly, if some
-one else does not indiscreetly indulge them. I once heard a judicious
-father say, “He would treat his child as he would his horse: first
-convince it he was its master, and then its friend.” But yet a rigid
-style of behaviour is by no means to be adopted; on the contrary, I wish
-to remark, that it is only in the years of childhood that the happiness
-of a human being depends entirely on others—and to embitter those years
-by needless restraint is cruel. To conciliate affection, affection must
-be shown, and little proofs of it ought always to be given—let them not
-appear weaknesses, and they will sink deep into the young mind, and call
-forth its most amiable propensities. The turbulent passions may be kept
-down till reason begins to dawn.
-
-In the nursery too, they are taught to speak; and there they not only
-hear nonsense, but that nonsense retailed out in such silly, affected
-tones as must disgust;—yet these are the tones which the child first
-imitates, and its innocent playful manner renders them tolerable, if not
-pleasing; but afterwards they are not easily got the better of—nay, many
-women always retain the pretty prattle of the nursery, and do not forget
-to lisp, when they have learnt to languish.
-
-Children are taught revenge and lies in their very cradles. If they fall
-down, or strike their heads against any thing, to quiet them they are
-bid return the injury, and their little hands held out to do it. When
-they cry, or are troublesome, the cat or dog is chastised, or some
-bugbear called to take them away; which only terrifies them at first,
-for they soon find out that the nurse means nothing by these dreadful
-threatenings. Indeed, so well do they discover the fallacy, that I have
-seen little creatures, who could scarcely speak, play over the same
-tricks with their doll or the cat.
-
-How, then, when the mind comes under discipline, can precepts of truth
-be inforced, when the first examples they have had would lead them to
-practice the contrary?
-
-
-
-
- MORAL DISCIPLINE.
-
-
-It has been asserted, “That no being, merely human, could properly
-educate a child.” I entirely coincide with this author; but though
-perfection cannot be attained, and unforeseen events will ever govern
-human conduct, yet still it is our duty to lay down some rule to
-regulate our actions by, and to adhere to it, as consistently as our
-infirmities will permit. To be able to follow Mr. Locke’s system (and
-this may be said of almost all treatises on education) the parents must
-have subdued their own passions, which is not often the case in any
-considerable degree.
-
-The marriage state is too often a state of discord; it does not always
-happen that both parents are rational, and the weakest have it in their
-power to do most mischief.
-
-How then are the tender minds of children to be cultivated?—Mamma is
-only anxious that they should love her best, and perhaps takes pains to
-sow those seeds, which have produced such luxuriant weeds in her own
-mind. Or, what still more frequently occurs, the children are at first
-made play-things of, and when their tempers have been spoiled by
-indiscreet indulgence, they become troublesome, and are mostly left with
-servants; the first notions they imbibe, therefore, are mean and vulgar.
-They are taught cunning, the wisdom of that class of people, and a love
-of truth, the foundation of virtue, is soon obliterated from their
-minds. It is, in my opinion, a well-proved fact, that principles of
-truth are innate. Without reasoning we assent to many truths; we feel
-their force, and artful sophistry can only blunt those feelings which
-nature has implanted in us as instinctive guards to virtue.
-Dissimulation and cunning will soon drive all other good qualities
-before them, and deprive the mind of that beautiful simplicity, which
-can never be too much cherished.
-
-Indeed it is of the utmost consequence to make a child artless, or to
-speak with more propriety, not to teach them to be otherwise; and in
-order to do so we must keep them out of the way of bad examples. Art is
-almost always practiced by servants, and the same methods which children
-observe them to use, to shield themselves from blame, they will
-adopt—and cunning is so nearly allied to falsehood, that it will
-infallibly lead to it—or some foolish prevaricating subterfuge will
-occur; to silence any reproaches of the mind which may arise, if an
-attention to truth has been inculcated.
-
-Another cause or source of art is injudicious correction. Accidents or
-giddy tricks are too frequently punished, and if children can conceal
-these, they will, to avoid chastisement. Restrain them, therefore, but
-never correct them without a very sufficient cause; such as a violation
-of truth, cruelty to animals, inferiors, or those kind of follies which
-lead to vice.
-
-Children should be permitted to enter into conversation; but it requires
-great discernment to find out such subjects as will gradually improve
-them. Animals are the first objects which catch their attention; and I
-think little stories about them would not only amuse but instruct at the
-same time, and have the best effect in forming the temper and
-cultivating the good dispositions of the heart. There are many little
-books which have this tendency. One in particular I recollect: The
-Perambulations of a Mouse. I cannot here help mentioning a book of
-hymns, in measured prose, written by the ingenious author of many other
-proper lessons for children. These hymns, I imagine, would contribute to
-fill the heart with religious sentiments and affections; and, if I may
-be allowed the expression, make the Deity obvious to the senses. The
-understanding, however, should not be overloaded any more than the
-stomach. Intellectual improvements, like the growth and formation of the
-body, must be gradual—yet there is no reason why the mind should lie
-fallow, while its “frail tenement” is imperceptibly fitting itself for a
-more reasonable inhabitant. It will not lie fallow; promiscuous seeds
-will be sown by accident, and they will shoot up with the wheat, and
-perhaps never be eradicated.
-
-Whenever a child asks a question, it should always have a reasonable
-answer given it. Its little passions should be engaged. They are mostly
-fond of stories, and proper ones would improve them even while they are
-amused. Instead of these, their heads are filled with improbable tales,
-and superstitious accounts of invisible beings, which breed strange
-prejudices and vain fears in their minds.
-
-The lisp of the nursery is confirmed, and vulgar phrases are acquired;
-which children, if possible, should never hear. To be able to express
-the thoughts with facility and propriety, is of great consequence in
-life, and if children were never led astray in this particular, it would
-prevent much trouble.
-
-The riot too of the kitchen, or any other place where children are left
-only with servants, makes the decent restraint of the parlour irksome. A
-girl, who has vivacity, soon grows a romp; and if there are male
-servants, they go out a walking with them, and will frequently take
-little freedoms with Miss, the bearing with which gives a forwardness to
-her air, and makes her pert. The becoming modesty, which being
-accustomed to converse with superiors, will give a girl, is entirely
-done away. I must own, I am quite charmed when I see a sweet young
-creature, shrinking as it were from observation, and listening rather
-than talking. It is possible a girl may have this manner without having
-a very good understanding. If it should be so, this diffidence prevents
-her from being troublesome.
-
-It is the duty of a parent to preserve a child from receiving wrong
-impressions.—As to prejudices, the first notions we have deserve that
-name; for it is not till we begin to waver in our opinions, that we
-exert our reason to examine them—and then, if they are received, they
-may be called our own.
-
-The first things, then, that children ought to be encouraged to observe,
-are a strict adherence to truth; a proper submission to superiors; and
-condescension to inferiors. These are the main articles; but there are
-many others, which compared to them are trivial, and yet are of
-importance. It is not pleasing to see a child full of bows and grimaces;
-yet they need not be suffered to be rude. They should be employed, and
-such fables and tales may be culled out for them as would excite their
-curiosity. A taste for the beauties of nature should be very early
-cultivated: many things, with respect to the vegetable and animal world,
-may be explained in an amusing way; and this is an innocent source of
-pleasure within every one’s reach.
-
-Above all, try to teach them to combine their ideas. It is of more use
-than can be conceived, for a child to learn to compare things that are
-similar in some respects, and different in others. I wish them to be
-taught to think—thinking, indeed, is a severe exercise, and exercise of
-either mind or body will not at first be entered on, but with a view to
-pleasure. Not that I would have them make long reflections; for when
-they do not arise from experience, they are mostly absurd.
-
-
-
-
- EXTERIOR ACCOMPLISHMENTS.
-
-
-Under this head may be ranked all those accomplishments which merely
-render the person attractive; and those half-learnt ones which do not
-improve the mind. “A little learning of any kind is a dangerous thing;”
-and so far from making a person pleasing, it has the contrary effect.
-
-Parents have mostly some weighty business in hand, which they make a
-pretext to themselves for neglecting the arduous task of educating their
-children; they are therefore sent to school, and the allowance for them
-is so low, that the person who undertakes the charge must have more than
-she can possibly attend to; of course, the mechanical parts of education
-can only be observed. I have known children who could repeat things in
-the order they learnt them, that were quite at a loss when put out of
-the beaten track. If the understanding is not exercised, the memory will
-be employed to little purpose.
-
-Girls learn something of music, drawing, and geography; but they do not
-know enough to engage their attention, and render it an employment of
-the mind. If they can play over a few tunes to their acquaintance, and
-have a drawing or two (half done by the master) to hang up in their
-rooms, they imagine themselves artists for the rest of their lives. It
-is not the being able to execute a trifling landscape, or any thing of
-the kind, that is of consequence—These are at best but trifles, and the
-foolish, indiscriminate praises which are bestowed on them only produce
-vanity. But what is really of no importance, when considered in this
-light, becomes of the utmost, when a girl has a fondness for the art,
-and a desire of excellence. Whatever tends to make a person in some
-measure independent of the senses, is a prop to virtue. Amusing
-employments must first occupy the mind; and as an attention to moral
-duties leads to piety, so whoever weighs one subject will turn to
-others, and new ideas will rush into the mind. The faculties will be
-exercised, and not suffered to sleep, which will give a variety to the
-character.
-
-Dancing and elegance of manners are very pleasing, if too great a stress
-is not laid on them. These acquirements catch the senses, and open the
-way to the heart; but unsupported by solid good qualities, their reign
-is short.
-
-The lively thoughtlessness of youth makes every young creature agreeable
-for the time; but when those years are flown, and sense is not
-substituted in the stead of vivacity, the follies of youth are acted
-over, and they never consider, that the things which please in their
-proper season, disgust out of it. It is very absurd to see a woman,
-whose brow time has marked with wrinkles, aping the manners of a girl in
-her teens.
-
-I do not think it foreign to the present subject to mention the trifling
-conversations women are mostly fond of. In general, they are prone to
-ridicule. As they lay the greatest stress on manners, the most
-respectable characters will not escape its lash, if deficient in this
-article. Ridicule has been, with some people, the boasted test of
-truth—if so, our sex ought to make wonderful improvements; but I am apt
-to think, they often exert this talent till they lose all perception of
-it themselves. Affectation, and not ignorance, is the fair game for
-ridicule; and even affectation some good-natured persons will spare. We
-should never give pain without a design to amend.
-
-Exterior accomplishments are not to be despised, if the acquiring of
-them does not satisfy the possessors, and prevent their cultivating the
-more important ones.
-
-
-
-
- ARTIFICIAL MANNERS.
-
-
-It may be thought, that artificial manners and exterior accomplishments
-are much the same; but I think the former take a far wider range, and
-are materially different. The one arises from affectation, and the other
-seems only an error in judgment.
-
-The emotions of the mind often appear conspicuous in the countenance and
-manner. These emotions, when they arise from sensibility and virtue, are
-inexpressibly pleasing. But it is easier to copy the cast of
-countenance, than to cultivate the virtues which animate and improve it.
-
-How many people are like whitened sepulchres, and careful only about
-appearances! yet if we are too anxious to gain the approbation of the
-world, we must often forfeit our own.
-
-How bewitching is that humble softness of manners which humility gives
-birth to, and how faint are the imitations of affectation! That
-gentleness of behaviour, which makes us courteous to all, and that
-benevolence, which makes us loth to offend any, and studious to please
-every creature, is sometimes copied by the polite; but how aukward is
-the copy! The warmest professions of regard are prostituted on all
-occasions. No distinctions are made, and the esteem which is only due to
-merit, appears to be lavished on all—Nay, affection is affected; at
-least, the language is borrowed, when there is no glow of it in the
-heart. Civility is due to all, but regard or admiration should never be
-expressed when it is not felt.
-
-As humility gives the most pleasing cast to the countenance, so from
-sincerity arises that artlessness of manners which is so engaging. She
-who suffers herself to be seen as she really is, can never be thought
-affected. She is not solicitous to act a part; her endeavour is not to
-hide; but correct her failings, and her face has of course that beauty,
-which an attention to the mind only gives. I never knew a person really
-ugly, who was not foolish or vicious; and I have seen the most beautiful
-features deformed by passion and vice. It is true, regular features
-strike at first; but it is a well ordered mind which occasions those
-turns of expression in the countenance, which make a lasting impression.
-
-Feeling is ridiculous when affected; and even when felt, ought not to be
-displayed. It will appear if genuine; but when pushed forward to notice,
-it is obvious vanity has rivalled sorrow, and that the prettiness of the
-thing is thought of. Let the manners arise from the mind, and let there
-be no disguise for the genuine emotions of the heart.
-
-Things merely ornamental are soon disregarded, and disregard can
-scarcely be borne when there is no internal support.
-
-To have in this uncertain world some stay, which cannot be undermined,
-is of the utmost consequence; and this stay it is, which gives that
-dignity to the manners, which shews that a person does not depend on
-mere human applause for comfort and satisfaction.
-
-
-
-
- DRESS.
-
-
-Many able pens have dwelt on the peculiar foibles of our sex. We have
-been equally desired to avoid the two extremes in dress, and the
-necessity of cleanliness has been insisted on, “As from the body’s
-purity the mind receives a sympathetic aid.”
-
-By far too much of a girl’s time is taken up in dress. This is an
-exterior accomplishment; but I chose to consider it by itself. The body
-hides the mind, and it is, in its turn, obscured by the drapery. I hate
-to see the frame of a picture so glaring, as to catch the eye and divide
-the attention. Dress ought to adorn the person, and not rival it. It may
-be simple, elegant, and becoming, without being expensive; and
-ridiculous fashions disregarded, while singularity is avoided. The
-beauty of dress (I shall raise astonishment by saying so) is its not
-being conspicuous one way or the other; when it neither distorts, or
-hides the human form by unnatural protuberances. If ornaments are much
-studied, a consciousness of being well dressed will appear in the
-face—and surely this mean pride does not give much sublimity to it.
-
-“Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.” And how much
-conversation does dress furnish, which surely cannot be very improving
-or entertaining.
-
-It gives rise to envy, and contests for trifling superiority, which do
-not render a woman very respectable to the other sex.
-
-Arts are used to obtain money; and much is squandered away, which if
-saved for charitable purposes, might alleviate the distress of many poor
-families, and soften the heart of the girl who entered into such scenes
-of woe.
-
-In the article of dress may be included the whole tribe of
-beauty-washes, cosmetics, Olympian dew, oriental herbs, liquid bloom,
-and the paint which enlivened Ninon’s face, and bid defiance to time.
-These numerous and essential articles are advertised in so ridiculous a
-style, that the rapid sale of them is a very severe reflection on the
-understanding of those females who encourage it. The dew and herbs, I
-imagine, are very harmless, but I do not know whether the same may be
-said of the paint. White is certainly very prejudicial to the health,
-and never can be made to resemble nature. The red, too, takes off from
-the expression of the countenance, and the beautiful glow which modesty,
-affection, or any other emotion of the mind, gives, can never be seen.
-It is not “a mind-illumined face.” “The body does not charm, because the
-mind is seen,” but just the contrary; and if caught by it a man marries
-a woman thus disguised, he may chance not to be satisfied with her real
-person. A made-up face may strike visitors, but will certainly disgust
-domestic friends. And one obvious inference is drawn, truth is not
-expected to govern the inhabitant of so artificial a form. The false
-life with which rouge animates the eyes, is not of the most delicate
-kind; nor does a woman’s dressing herself in a way to attract
-languishing glances, give us the most advantageous opinion of the purity
-of her mind.
-
-I forgot to mention powder among the deceptions. It is a pity that it
-should be so generally worn. The most beautiful ornament of the features
-is disguised, and the shade it would give to the countenance entirely
-lost. The color of every person’s hair generally suits the complexion,
-and is calculated to set it off. What absurdity then do they run into,
-who use red, blue, and yellow powder!—And what a false taste does it
-exhibit!
-
-The quantity of pomatum is often disgusting. We laugh at the Hottentots,
-and in some things adopt their customs.
-
-Simplicity of Dress, and unaffected manners, should go together. They
-demand respect, and will be admired by people of taste, even when love
-is out of the question.
-
-
-
-
- THE FINE ARTS.
-
-
-Music and painting, and many other ingenious arts, are now brought to
-great perfection, and afford the most rational and delicate pleasure.
-
-It is easy to find out if a young person has a taste for them. If they
-have, do not suffer it to lie dormant. Heaven kindly bestowed it, and a
-great blessing it is; but, like all other blessings, may be perverted:
-yet the intrinsic value is not lessened by the perversion. Should nature
-have been a niggard to them in this respect, persuade them to be silent,
-and not feign raptures they do not feel; for nothing can be more
-ridiculous.
-
-In music I prefer expression to execution. The simple melody of some
-artless airs has often soothed my mind, when it has been harrassed by
-care; and I have been raised from the very depths of sorrow, by the
-sublime harmony of some of Handel’s compositions. I have been lifted
-above this little scene of grief and care, and mused on Him, from whom
-all bounty flows.
-
-A person must have sense, taste, and sensibility, to render their music
-interesting. The nimble dance of the fingers may raise wonder, but not
-delight.
-
-As to drawing, those cannot be really charmed by it, who do not observe
-the beauties of nature, and even admire them.
-
-If a person is fond of tracing the effects of the passions, and marking
-the appearances they give to the countenance, they will be glad to see
-characters displayed on canvass, and enter into the spirit of them; but
-if by them the book of nature has not been read, their admiration is
-childish.
-
-Works of fancy are very amusing, if a girl has a lively fancy; but if
-she makes others do the greatest part of them, and only wishes for the
-credit of doing them, do not encourage her.
-
-Writing may be termed a fine art; and, I am sure, it is a very useful
-one. The style in particular deserves attention. Young people are very
-apt to substitute words for sentiments, and clothe mean thoughts in
-pompous diction. Industry and time are necessary to cure this, and will
-often do it. Children should be led into correspondences, and methods
-adopted to make them write down their sentiments, and they should be
-prevailed on to relate the stories they have read in their own words.
-Writing well is of great consequence in life as to our temporal
-interest, and of still more to the mind; as it teaches a person to
-arrange their thoughts, and digest them. Besides, it forms the only true
-basis of rational and elegant conversation.
-
-Reading, and such arts as have been already mentioned, would fill up the
-time, and prevent a young person’s being lost in dissipation, which
-enervates the mind, and often leads to improper connections. When habits
-are fixed, and a character in some measure formed, the entering into the
-busy world, so far from being dangerous, is useful. Knowledge will
-imperceptibly be acquired, and the taste improved, if admiration is not
-more sought for than improvement. For those seldom make observation who
-are full of themselves.
-
-
-
-
- READING.
-
-
-It is an old, but a very true observation, that the human mind must ever
-be employed. A relish for reading, or any of the fine arts, should be
-cultivated very early in life; and those who reflect can tell, of what
-importance it is for the mind to have some resource in itself, and not
-to be entirely dependant on the senses for employment and amusement. If
-it unfortunately is so, it must submit to meanness, and often to vice,
-in order to gratify them. The wisest and best are too much under their
-influence; and the endeavouring to conquer them, when reason and virtue
-will not give their sanction, constitutes great part of the warfare of
-life. What support, then, have they who are all senses, and who are full
-of schemes, which terminate in temporal objects?
-
-Reading is the most rational employment, if people seek food for the
-understanding, and do not read merely to remember words; or with a view
-to quote celebrated authors, and retail sentiments they do not
-understand or feel. Judicious books enlarge the mind and improve the
-heart, though some, by them, “are made coxcombs whom nature meant for
-fools.”
-
-Those productions which give a wrong account of the human passions, and
-the various accidents of life, ought not to be read before the judgment
-is formed, or at least exercised. Such accounts are one great cause of
-the affectation of young women. Sensibility is described and praised,
-and the effects of it represented in a way so different from nature,
-that those who imitate it must make themselves very ridiculous. A false
-taste is acquired, and sensible books appear dull and insipid after
-those superficial performances, which obtain their full end if they can
-keep the mind in a continual ferment. Gallantry is made the only
-interesting subject with the novelist; reading, therefore, will often
-co-operate to make his fair admirers insignificant.
-
-I do not mean to recommend books of an abstracted or grave cast. There
-are in our language many, in which instruction and amusement are
-blended; the Adventurer is of this kind. I mention this book on account
-of its beautiful allegories and affecting tales, and similar ones may
-easily be selected. Reason strikes most forcibly when illustrated by the
-brilliancy of fancy. The sentiments which are scattered may be observed,
-and when they are relished, and the mind set to work, it may be allowed
-to chuse books for itself, for every thing will then instruct.
-
-I would have every one try to form an opinion of an author themselves,
-though modesty may restrain them from mentioning it. Many are so anxious
-to have the reputation of taste, that they only praise the authors whose
-merit is indisputable. I am sick of hearing of the sublimity of Milton,
-the elegance and harmony of Pope, and the original, untaught genius of
-Shakespear. These cursory remarks are made by some who know nothing of
-nature, and could not enter into the spirit of those authors, or
-understand them.
-
-A florid style mostly passes with the ignorant for fine writing; many
-sentences are admired that have no meaning in them, though they contain
-“words of thundering sound,” and others that have nothing to recommend
-them but sweet and musical terminations.
-
-Books of theology are not calculated for young persons; religion is best
-taught by example. The Bible should be read with particular respect, and
-they should not be taught reading by so sacred a book; lest they might
-consider that as a task, which ought to be a source of the most exalted
-satisfaction.
-
-It may be observed, that I recommend the mind’s being put into a proper
-train, and then left to itself. Fixed rules cannot be given, it must
-depend on the nature and strength of the understanding; and those who
-observe it can best tell what kind of cultivation will improve it. The
-mind is not, cannot be created by the teacher, though it may be
-cultivated, and its real powers found out.
-
-The active spirits of youth may make time glide away without
-intellectual enjoyments; but when the novelty of the scene is worn off,
-the want of them will be felt, and nothing else can fill up the void.
-The mind is confined to the body, and must sink into sensuality; for it
-has nothing to do but to provide for it, “how it shall eat and drink,
-and wherewithal it shall be clothed.”
-
-All kinds of refinement have been found fault with for increasing our
-cares and sorrows; yet surely the contrary effect also arises from them.
-Taste and thought open many sources of pleasure, which do not depend on
-fortune.
-
-No employment of the mind is a sufficient excuse for neglecting domestic
-duties, and I cannot conceive that they are incompatible. A woman may
-fit herself to be the companion and friend of a man of sense, and yet
-know how to take care of his family.
-
-
-
-
- BOARDING-SCHOOLS.
-
-
-If a mother has leisure and good sense, and more than one daughter, I
-think she could best educate them herself; but as many family reasons
-render it necessary sometimes to send them from home, boarding-schools
-are fixed on. I must own it is my opinion, that the manners are too much
-attended to in all schools; and in the nature of things it cannot be
-otherwise, as the reputation of the house depends upon it, and most
-people can judge of them. The temper is neglected, the same lessons are
-taught to all, and some get a smattering of things they have not
-capacity ever to understand; few things are learnt thoroughly, but many
-follies contracted, and an immoderate fondness for dress among the rest.
-
-To prepare a woman to fulfil the important duties of a wife and mother,
-are certainly the objects that should be in view during the early period
-of life; yet accomplishments are most thought of, and they, and
-all-powerful beauty, generally gain the heart; and as the keeping of it
-is not considered of until it is lost, they are deemed of the most
-consequence. A sensible governess cannot attend to the minds of the
-number she is obliged to have. She may have been many years struggling
-to get established, and when fortune smiles, does not chuse to lose the
-opportunity of providing for old age; therefore continues to enlarge her
-school, with a view to accumulate a competency for that purpose.
-Domestic concerns cannot possibly be made a part of their employment, or
-proper conversations often entered on. Improper books will by stealth be
-introduced, and the bad example of one or two vicious children, in the
-play-hours, infect a number. Their gratitude and tenderness are not
-called forth in the way they might be by maternal affection. Many
-miseries does a girl of a mild disposition suffer, which a tender parent
-could guard her from. I shall not contest about the graces, but the
-virtues are best learnt at home, if a mother will give up her time and
-thoughts to the task; but if she cannot, they should be sent to school;
-for people who do not manage their children well, and have not large
-fortunes, must leave them often with servants, where they are in danger
-of still greater corruptions.
-
-
-
-
- THE TEMPER.
-
-
-The forming of the temper ought to be the continual thought, and the
-first task of a parent or teacher. For to speak moderately, half the
-miseries of life arise from peevishness, or a tyrannical domineering
-temper. The tender, who are so by nature, or those whom religion has
-moulded with so heavenly a disposition, give way for the sake of
-peace—yet still this giving way undermines their domestic comfort, and
-stops the current of affection; they labor for patience, and labor is
-ever painful.
-
-The governing of our temper is truly the business of our whole lives;
-but surely it would very much assist us if we were early put into the
-right road. As it is, when reason gains some strength, she has mountains
-of rubbish to remove, or perhaps exerts all her powers to justify the
-errors of folly and passion, rather than root them out.
-
-A constant attention to the management of the temper produces gentleness
-and humility, and is practised on all occasions, as it is not done “to
-be seen of men.” This meek spirit arises from good sense and resolution,
-and should not be confounded with indolence and timidity; weaknesses of
-mind, which often pass for good nature. She who submits, without
-conviction, to a parent or husband, will as unreasonably tyrannise over
-her servants; for slavish fear and tyranny go together. Resentment,
-indeed, may and will be felt occasionally by the best of human beings;
-yet humility will soon conquer it, and convert scorn and contempt into
-pity, and drive out that hasty pride which is always guarding Self from
-insult; which takes fire on the most trivial occasions, and which will
-not admit of a superior, or even an equal. With such a temper is often
-joined that bashful aukwardness which arises from ignorance, and is
-frequently termed diffidence; but which does not, in my opinion, deserve
-such a distinction. True humility is not innate, but like every other
-good quality must be cultivated. Reflections on miscarriages of conduct,
-and mistakes in opinion, sink it deep into the mind; especially if those
-miscarriages and mistakes have been a cause of pain—when we smart for
-our folly we remember it.
-
-Few people look into their own hearts, or think of their tempers, though
-they severely censure others, on whose side they say the fault always
-lies. Now I am apt to believe, that there is not a temper in the world
-which does not need correction, and of course attention. Those who are
-termed good-humored, are frequently giddy, indolent, and insensible; yet
-because the society they mix with appear seldom displeased with a person
-who does not contest, and will laugh off an affront, they imagine
-themselves pleasing, when they are only not disagreeable. Warm tempers
-are too easily irritated. The one requires a spur, the other a rein.
-Health of mind, as well as body, must in general be obtained by patient
-submission to self-denial, and disagreeable operations.
-
-If the presence of the Deity be inculcated and dwelt on till an habitual
-reverence is established in the mind, it will check the sallies of anger
-and sneers of peevishness, which corrode our peace, and render us
-wretched, without any claim to pity.
-
-The wisdom of the Almighty has so ordered things, that one cause
-produces many effects. While we are looking into another’s mind, and
-forming their temper, we are insensibly correcting our own; and every
-act of benevolence which we exert to our fellow-creatures, does
-ourselves the most essential services. Active virtue fits us for the
-society of more exalted beings. Our philanthrophy is a proof, we are
-told, that we are capable of loving our Creator. Indeed this divine
-love, or charity, appears to me the principal trait that remains of the
-illustrious image of the Deity, which was originally stampt on the soul,
-and which is to be renewed. Exalted views will raise the mind above
-trifling cares, and the many little weaknesses, which make us a torment
-to ourselves and others. Our temper will gradually improve, and vanity,
-which “the creature is made subject to,” has not an entire dominion.
-
-But I have digressed. A judicious parent can only manage a child in this
-important article; and example will best enforce precept.
-
-Be careful, however, not to make hypocrites; smothered flames will blaze
-out with more violence for having been kept down. Expect not to do all
-yourself; experience must enable the child to assist you; you can only
-lay the foundation, or prevent bad propensities from settling into
-habits.
-
-
-
-
-UNFORTUNATE SITUATION OF FEMALES, FASHIONABLY EDUCATED, AND LEFT WITHOUT
- A FORTUNE.
-
-
-I have hitherto only spoken of those females, who will have a provision
-made for them by their parents. But many who have been well, or at least
-fashionably educated, are left without a fortune, and if they are not
-entirely devoid of delicacy, they must frequently remain single.
-
-Few are the modes of earning a subsistence, and those very humiliating.
-Perhaps to be an humble companion to some rich old cousin, or what is
-still worse, to live with strangers, who are so intolerably tyrannical,
-that none of their own relations can bear to live with them, though they
-should even expect a fortune in reversion. It is impossible to enumerate
-the many hours of anguish such a person must spend. Above the servants,
-yet considered by them as a spy, and ever reminded of her inferiority
-when in conversation with the superiors. If she cannot condescend to
-mean flattery, she has not a chance of being a favorite; and should any
-of the visitors take notice of her, and she for a moment forget her
-subordinate state, she is sure to be reminded of it.
-
-Painfully sensible of unkindness, she is alive to every thing, and many
-sarcasms reach her, which were perhaps directed another way. She is
-alone, shut out from equality and confidence, and the concealed anxiety
-impairs her constitution; for she must wear a cheerful face, or be
-dismissed. The being dependant on the caprice of a fellow-creature,
-though certainly very necessary in this state of discipline, is yet a
-very bitter corrective, which we would fain shrink from.
-
-A teacher at a school is only a kind of upper servant, who has more work
-than the menial ones.
-
-A governess to young ladies is equally disagreeable. It is ten to one if
-they meet with a reasonable mother; and if she is not so, she will be
-continually finding fault to prove she is not ignorant, and be
-displeased if her pupils do not improve, but angry if the proper methods
-are taken to make them do so. The children treat them with disrespect,
-and often with insolence. In the mean time life glides away, and the
-spirits with it; “and when youth and genial years are flown,” they have
-nothing to subsist on; or, perhaps, on some extraordinary occasion, some
-small allowance may be made for them, which is thought a great charity.
-
-The few trades which are left, are now gradually falling into the hands
-of the men, and certainly they are not very respectable.
-
-It is hard for a person who has a relish for polished society, to herd
-with the vulgar, or to condescend to mix with her former equals when she
-is considered in a different light. What unwelcome heart-breaking
-knowledge is then poured in on her! I mean a view of the selfishness and
-depravity of the world; for every other acquirement is a source of
-pleasure, though they may occasion temporary inconveniences. How cutting
-is the contempt she meets with!—A young mind looks round for love and
-friendship; but love and friendship fly from poverty: expect them not if
-you are poor! The mind must then sink into meanness, and accommodate
-itself to its new state, or dare to be unhappy. Yet I think no
-reflecting person would give up the experience and improvement they have
-gained, to have avoided the misfortunes; on the contrary, they are
-thankfully ranked amongst the choicest blessings of life, when we are
-not under their immediate pressure.
-
-How earnestly does a mind full of sensibility look for disinterested
-friendship, and long to meet with good unalloyed. When fortune smiles
-they hug the dear delusion; but dream not that it is one. The painted
-cloud disappears suddenly, the scene is changed, and what an aching void
-is left in the heart! a void which only religion can fill up—and how few
-seek this internal comfort!
-
-A woman, who has beauty without sentiment, is in great danger of being
-seduced; and if she has any, cannot guard herself from painful
-mortifications. It is very disagreeable to keep up a continual reserve
-with men she has been formerly familiar with; yet if she places
-confidence, it is ten to one but she is deceived. Few men seriously
-think of marrying an inferior; and if they have honor enough not to take
-advantage of the artless tenderness of a woman who loves, and thinks not
-of the difference of rank, they do not undeceive her until she has
-anticipated happiness, which, contrasted with her dependant situation,
-appears delightful. The disappointment is severe; and the heart receives
-a wound which does not easily admit of a compleat cure, as the good that
-is missed is not valued according to its real worth: for fancy drew the
-picture, and grief delights to create food to feed on.
-
-If what I have written should be read by parents, who are now going on
-in thoughtless extravagance, and anxious only that their daughters may
-be _genteelly educated_, let them consider to what sorrows they expose
-them; for I have not over-coloured the picture.
-
-Though I warn parents to guard against leaving their daughters to
-encounter so much misery; yet if a young woman falls into it, she ought
-not to be discontented. Good must ultimately arise from every thing, to
-those who look beyond this infancy of their being; and here the comfort
-of a good conscience is our only stable support. The main business of
-our lives is to learn to be virtuous; and He who is training us up for
-immortal bliss, knows best what trials will contribute to make us so;
-and our resignation and improvement will render us respectable to
-ourselves, and to that Being, whose approbation is of more value than
-life itself. It is true, tribulation produces anguish, and we would fain
-avoid the bitter cup, though convinced its effects would be the most
-salutary. The Almighty is then the kind parent, who chastens and
-educates, and indulges us not when it would tend to our hurt. He is
-compassion itself, and never wounds but to heal, when the ends of
-correction are answered.
-
-
-
-
- LOVE.
-
-
-I think there is not a subject that admits so little of reasoning on as
-love; nor can rules be laid down that will not appear to lean too much
-one way or the other. Circumstances must, in a great measure, govern the
-conduct in this particular; yet who can be a judge in their own case?
-Perhaps, before they begin to consider the matter, they see through the
-medium of passion, and its suggestions are often mistaken for those of
-reason. We can no other way account for the absurd matches we every day
-have an opportunity of observing; for in this respect, even the most
-sensible men and women err. A variety of causes will occasion an
-attachment; an endeavour to supplant another, or being by some accident
-confined to the society of one person. Many have found themselves
-entangled in an affair of honor, who only meant to fill up the heavy
-hours in an amusing way, or raise jealousy in some other bosom.
-
-It is a difficult task to write on a subject when our own passions are
-likely to blind us. Hurried away by our feelings, we are apt to set
-those things down as general maxims, which only our partial experience
-gives rise to. Though it is not easy to say how a person should act
-under the immediate influence of passion, yet they certainly have no
-excuse who are actuated only by vanity, and deceive by an equivocal
-behaviour in order to gratify it. There are quite as many male coquets
-as female, and they are far more pernicious pests to society, as their
-sphere of action is larger, and they are less exposed to the censure of
-the world. A smothered sigh, downcast look, and the many other little
-arts which are played off, may give extreme pain to a sincere, artless
-woman, though she cannot resent, or complain of, the injury. This kind
-of trifling, I think, much more inexcusable than inconstancy; and why it
-is so, appears so obvious, I need not point it out.
-
-People of sense and reflection are most apt to have violent and constant
-passions, and to be preyed on by them. Neither can they, for the sake of
-present pleasure, bear to act in such a manner, as that the retrospect
-should fill them with confusion and regret. Perhaps a delicate mind is
-not susceptible of a greater degree of misery, putting guilt out of the
-question, than what must arise from the consciousness of loving a person
-whom their reason does not approve. This, I am persuaded, has often been
-the case; and the passion must either be rooted out, or the continual
-allowances and excuses that are made will hurt the mind, and lessen the
-respect for virtue. Love, unsupported by esteem, must soon expire, or
-lead to depravity; as, on the contrary, when a worthy person is the
-object, it is the greatest incentive to improvement, and has the best
-effect on the manners and temper. We should always try to fix in our
-minds the rational grounds we have for loving a person, that we may be
-able to recollect them when we feel disgust or resentment; we should
-then habitually practise forbearance, and the many petty disputes which
-interrupt domestic peace would be avoided. A woman cannot reasonably be
-unhappy, if she is attached to a man of sense and goodness, though he
-may not be all she could wish.
-
-I am very far from thinking love irresistible, and not to be conquered.
-“If weak women go astray,” it is they, and not the stars, that are to be
-blamed. A resolute endeavour will almost always overcome difficulties. I
-knew a woman very early in life warmly attached to an agreeable man, yet
-she saw his faults; his principles were unfixed, and his prodigal turn
-would have obliged her to have restrained every benevolent emotion of
-her heart. She exerted her influence to improve him, but in vain did she
-for years try to do it. Convinced of the impossibility, she determined
-not to marry him, though she was forced to encounter poverty and its
-attendants.
-
-It is too universal a maxim with novelists, that love is felt but once;
-though it appears to me, that the heart which is capable of receiving an
-impression at all, and can distinguish, will turn to a new object when
-the first is found unworthy. I am convinced it is practicable, when a
-respect for goodness has the first place in the mind, and notions of
-perfection are not affixed to constancy. Many ladies are delicately
-miserable, and imagine that they are lamenting the loss of a lover, when
-they are full of self-applause, and reflections on their own superior
-refinement. Painful feelings are prolonged beyond their natural course,
-to gratify our desire of appearing heroines, and we deceive ourselves as
-well as others. When any sudden stroke of fate deprives us of those we
-love, we may not readily get the better of the blow; but when we find we
-have been led astray by our passions, and that it was our own
-imaginations which gave the high colouring to the picture, we may be
-certain time will drive it out of our minds. For we cannot often think
-of our folly without being displeased with ourselves, and such
-reflections are quickly banished. Habit and duty will co-operate, and
-religion may overcome what reason has in vain combated with; but
-refinement and romance are often confounded, and sensibility, which
-occasions this kind of inconstancy, is supposed to have the contrary
-effect.
-
-Nothing can more tend to destroy peace of mind, than platonic
-attachments. They are begun in false refinement, and frequently end in
-sorrow, if not in guilt. The two extremes often meet, and virtue carried
-to excess will sometimes lead to the opposite vice. Not that I mean to
-insinuate that there is no such thing as friendship between persons of
-different sexes; I am convinced of the contrary, I only mean to observe,
-that if a woman’s heart is disengaged, she should not give way to a
-pleasing delusion, and imagine she will be satisfied with the friendship
-of a man she admires, and prefers to the rest of the world. The heart is
-very treacherous, and if we do not guard its first emotions, we shall
-not afterwards be able to prevent its sighing for impossibilities. If
-there are any insuperable bars to an union in the common way, try to
-dismiss the dangerous tenderness, or it will undermine your comfort, and
-betray you into many errors. To attempt to raise ourselves above human
-beings is ridiculous; we cannot extirpate our passions, nor is it
-necessary that we should, though it may be wise sometimes not to stray
-too near a precipice, lest we fall over before we are aware. We cannot
-avoid much vexation and sorrow, if we are ever so prudent; it is then
-the part of wisdom to enjoy those gleams of sunshine which do not
-endanger our innocence, or lead to repentance. Love gilds all the
-prospects of life, and though it cannot always exclude apathy, it makes
-many cares appear trifling. Dean Swift hated the world, and only loved
-particular persons; yet pride rivalled them. A foolish wish of rising
-superior to the common wants and desires of the human species made him
-singular, but not respectable. He sacrificed an amiable woman to his
-caprice, and made those shun his company who would have been entertained
-and improved by his conversation, had he loved any one as well as
-himself. Universal benevolence is the first duty, and we should be
-careful not to let any passion so engross our thoughts, as to prevent
-our practising it. After all the dreams of rapture, earthly pleasures
-will not fill the mind, or support it when they have not the sanction of
-reason, or are too much depended on. The tumult of passion will subside,
-and even the pangs of disappointment cease to be felt. But for the
-wicked there is a worm that never dies—a guilty conscience. While that
-calm satisfaction which resignation produces, which cannot be described,
-but may be attained, in some degree, by those who try to keep in the
-strait, though thorny path which leads to bliss, shall sanctify the
-sorrows, and dignify the character of virtue.
-
-
-
-
- MATRIMONY.
-
-
-Early marriages are, in my opinion, a stop to improvement. If we were
-born only “to draw nutrition, propagate and rot,” the sooner the end of
-creation was answered the better: but as women are here allowed to have
-souls, the soul ought to be attended to. In youth a woman endeavours to
-please the other sex, in order, generally speaking, to get married, and
-this endeavour calls forth all her powers. If she has had a tolerable
-education, the foundation only is laid, for the mind does not soon
-arrive at maturity, and should not be engrossed by domestic cares before
-any habits are fixed. The passions also have too much influence over the
-judgment to suffer it to direct her in this most important affair; and
-many women, I am persuaded, marry a man before they are twenty, whom
-they would have rejected some years after. Very frequently, when the
-education has been neglected, the mind improves itself, if it has
-leisure for reflection, and experience to reflect on; but how can this
-happen when they are forced to act before they have had time to think,
-or find that they are unhappily married? Nay, should they be so
-fortunate as to get a good husband, they will not set a proper value on
-him; he will be found much inferior to the lovers described in novels,
-and their want of knowledge makes them frequently disgusted with the
-man, when the fault is in human nature.
-
-When a woman’s mind has gained some strength, she will in all
-probability pay more attention to her actions than a girl can be
-expected to do; and if she thinks seriously, she will chuse for a
-companion a man of principle; and this perhaps young people do not
-sufficiently attend to, or see the necessity of doing. A woman of
-feeling must be very much hurt if she is obliged to keep her children
-out of their father’s company, that their morals may not be injured by
-his conversation; and besides, the whole arduous task of education
-devolves on her, and in such a case it is not very practicable.
-Attention to the education of children must be irksome, when life
-appears to have so many charms, and its pleasures are not found
-fallacious. Many are but just returned from a boarding-school, when they
-are placed at the head of a family, and how fit they are to manage it, I
-leave the judicious to judge. Can they improve a child’s understanding,
-when they are scarcely out of the state of childhood themselves?
-
-Dignity of manners, too, and proper reserve are often wanting. The
-constant attendant on too much familiarity is contempt. Women are often
-before marriage prudish, and afterwards they think they may innocently
-give way to fondness, and overwhelm the poor man with it. They think
-they have a legal right to his affections, and grow remiss in their
-endeavours to please. There are a thousand nameless decencies which good
-sense gives rise to, and artless proofs of regard which flow from the
-heart, and will reach it, if it is not depraved. It has ever occurred to
-me, that it was sufficient for a woman to receive caresses, and not
-bestow them. She ought to distinguish between fondness and tenderness.
-The latter is the sweetest cordial of life; but, like all other
-cordials, should be reserved for particular occasions; to exhilarate the
-spirits, when depressed by sickness, or lost in sorrow. Sensibility will
-best instruct. Some delicacies can never be pointed out or described,
-though they sink deep into the heart, and render the hours of distress
-supportable.
-
-A woman should have so proper a pride, as not easily to forget a
-deliberate affront; though she must not too hastily resent any little
-coolness. We cannot always feel alike, and all are subject to changes of
-temper without an adequate cause.
-
-Reason must often be called in to fill up the vacuums of life; but too
-many of our sex suffer theirs to lie dormant. A little ridicule and
-smart turn of expression, often confutes without convincing; and tricks
-are played off to raise tenderness, even while they are forfeiting
-esteem.
-
-Women are said to be the weaker vessel, and many are the miseries which
-this weakness brings on them. Men have in some respects very much the
-advantage. If they have a tolerable understanding, it has a chance to be
-cultivated. They are forced to see human nature as it is, and are not
-left to dwell on the pictures of their own imaginations. Nothing, I am
-sure, calls forth the faculties so much as the being obliged to struggle
-with the world; and this is not a woman’s province in a married state.
-Her sphere of action is not large, and if she is not taught to look into
-her own heart, how trivial are her occupations and pursuits! What little
-arts engross and narrow her mind! “Cunning fills up the mighty void of
-sense,” and cares, which do not improve the heart or understanding, take
-up her attention. Of course, she falls a prey to childish anger, and
-silly capricious humors, which render her rather insignificant than
-vicious.
-
-In a comfortable situation, a cultivated mind is necessary to render a
-woman contented; and in a miserable one, it is her only consolation. A
-sensible, delicate woman, who by some strange accident, or mistake, is
-joined to a fool or a brute, must be wretched beyond all names of
-wretchedness, if her views are confined to the present scene. Of what
-importance, then, is intellectual improvement, when our comfort here,
-and happiness hereafter, depends upon it.
-
-Principles of religion should be fixed, and the mind not left to
-fluctuate in the time of distress, when it can receive succour from no
-other quarter. The conviction that every thing is working for our good
-will scarcely produce resignation, when we are deprived of our dearest
-hopes. How they can be satisfied, who have not this conviction, I cannot
-conceive; I rather think they will turn to some worldly support, and
-fall into folly, if not vice. For a little refinement only leads a woman
-into the wilds of romance, if she is not religious; nay, more, there is
-no true sentiment without it, nor perhaps any other effectual check to
-the passions.
-
-
-
-
- DESULTORY THOUGHTS.
-
-
-As every kind of domestic concern and family business is properly a
-woman’s province, to enable her to discharge her duty she should study
-the different branches of it. Nothing is more useful in a family than a
-little knowledge of physic, sufficient to make the mistress of it a
-judicious nurse. Many a person, who has had a sensible physician to
-attend them, have been lost for want of the other; for tenderness,
-without judgment, sometimes does more harm than good.
-
-The ignorant imagine there is something very mysterious in the practice
-of physic. They expect a medicine to work like a charm, and know nothing
-of the progress and crisis of disorders. The keeping of the patient low
-appears cruel, all kind of regimen is disregarded, and though the fever
-rages, they cannot be persuaded not to give them inflammatory food. “How
-(say they) can a person get well without nourishment?”
-
-The mind, too, should be soothed at the same time; and indeed, whenever
-it sinks, soothing is, at first, better than reasoning. The slackened
-nerves are not to be braced by words. When a mind is worried by care, or
-oppressed by sorrow, it cannot in a moment grow tranquil, and attend to
-the voice of reason.
-
-St. Paul says, “No chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous; but
-grievous: nevertheless, afterwards it yieldeth the peaceable fruits of
-righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.” It is plain, from
-these words of the Apostle, and from many other parts of Scripture, that
-afflictions are necessary to teach us true wisdom, and that in spite of
-this conviction, men would fain avoid the bitter draught, though certain
-that the drinking of it would be conducive to the purifying of their
-hearts. He who made us must know what will tend to our ultimate good;
-yet still all this is grievous, and the heart will throb with anguish
-when deprived of what it loves, and the tongue can scarcely faulter out
-an acquiescence to the Divine Will, when it is so contrary to our own.
-Due allowance ought then to be made for human infirmities, and the
-unhappy should be considered as objects of compassion, rather than
-blame. But in a very different stile does consolatory advice generally
-run; for instead of pouring oil or wine into the wound, it tends to
-convince the unfortunate persons that they are weak as well as unhappy.
-I am apt to imagine, that sorrow and resignation are not incompatible;
-and that though religion cannot make some disappointments pleasant, it
-prevents our repining, even while we smart under them. Did our feelings
-and reason always coincide, our passage through this world could not
-justly be termed a warfare, and faith would no longer be a virtue. It is
-our preferring the things that are not seen, to those which are, that
-proves us to be the heirs of promise.
-
-On the sacred word of the Most High, we rely with firm assurance, that
-the sufferings of the present life will work out a far more exceeding
-and eternal weight of glory; yet still they are allowed to be
-afflictions, which, though temporary, must still be grievous.
-
-The difference between those who sorrow without hope, and those who look
-up to Heaven, is not that the one feel more than the other, for they may
-be both equally depressed; but the latter think of the peaceable fruits
-which are to result from the discipline, and therefore patiently submit.
-
-I have almost run into a sermon,—and I shall not make an apology for it.
-
-Whatever contributes to make us compassionate and resolute, is of the
-utmost consequence; both these qualities are necessary, if we are
-confined to a sick chamber. Various are the misfortunes of life, and it
-may be the lot of most of us to see death in all its terrors, when it
-attacks a friend; yet even then we must exert our friendship, and try to
-chear the departing spirit.
-
-
-
-
- THE BENEFITS WHICH ARISE FROM DISAPPOINTMENTS.
-
-
-Most women, and men too, have no character at all. Just opinions and
-virtuous passions appear by starts, and while we are giving way to the
-love and admiration which those qualities raise, they are quite
-different creatures. It is reflection which forms habits, and fixes
-principles indelibly on the heart; without it, the mind is like a wreck
-drifted about by every squall. The passion that we think most of will
-soon rival all the rest; it is then in our power, this way, to
-strengthen our good dispositions, and in some measure to establish a
-character, which will not depend on every accidental impulse. To be
-convinced of truths, and yet not to feel or act up to them, is a common
-thing. Present pleasure drives all before it, and adversity is
-mercifully sent to force us to think.
-
-In the school of adversity we learn knowledge as well as virtue; yet we
-lament our hard fate, dwell on our disappointments, and never consider
-that our own wayward minds, and inconsistent hearts, require these
-needful correctives. Medicines are not sent to persons in health.
-
-It is a well-known remark, that our very wishes give us not our wish. I
-have often thought it might be set down as a maxim, that the greatest
-disappointment we can meet with is the gratification of our fondest
-wishes. But truth is sometimes not pleasant; we turn from it, and doat
-on an illusion; and if we were not in a probationary state, we should do
-well to thicken the cloud, rather than dispel it.
-
-There are some who delight in observing moral beauty, and their souls
-sicken when forced to view crimes and follies which could never hurt
-them. How numerous are the sorrows which reach such bosoms! They may
-truly be called _human creatures_; on every side they touch their
-fellow-mortals, and vibrate to the touch. Common humanity points out the
-important duties of our station; but sensibility (a kind of instinct,
-strengthened by reflection) can only teach the numberless minute things
-which give pain or pleasure.
-
-A benevolent mind often suffers more than the object it commiserates,
-and will bear an inconvenience itself to shelter another from it. It
-makes allowance for failings though it longs to meet perfection, which
-it seems formed to adore. The Author of all good continually calls
-himself, a God long-suffering; and those most resemble him who practice
-forbearance. Love and compassion are the most delightful feelings of the
-soul, and to exert them to all that breathe is the wish of the
-benevolent heart. To struggle with ingratitude and selfishness is
-grating beyond expression: and the sense we have of our weakness, though
-useful, is not pleasant. Thus it is with us, when we look for happiness,
-we meet with vexations: and if, now and then, we give way to tenderness,
-or any of the amiable passions, and taste pleasure, the mind, strained
-beyond its usual tone, falls into apathy. And yet we were made to be
-happy! But our passions will not contribute much to our bliss, till they
-are under the dominion of reason, and till that reason is enlightened
-and improved. Then sighing will cease, and all tears will be wiped away
-by that Being, in whose presence there is fulness of joy.
-
-A person of tenderness must ever have particular attachments, and ever
-be disappointed; yet still they must be attached, in spite of human
-frailty; for if the mind is not kept in motion by either hope or fear,
-it sinks into the dreadful state before-mentioned.
-
-I have very often heard it made a subject of ridicule, that when a
-person is disappointed in this world, they turn to the next. Nothing can
-be more natural than the transition; and it seems to me the scheme of
-Providence, that our finding things unsatisfactory here, should force us
-to think of the better country to which we are going.
-
-
-
-
- ON THE TREATMENT OF SERVANTS.
-
-
-The management of servants is a great part of the employment of a
-woman’s life; and her own temper depends very much on her behaviour to
-them.
-
-Servants are, in general, ignorant and cunning; we must consider their
-characters, if we would treat them properly, and continually practise
-forbearance. The same methods we use with children may be adopted with
-regard to them. Act uniformly, and never find fault without a just
-cause; and when there is, be positive, but not angry. A mind that is not
-too much engrossed by trifles, will not be discomposed by every little
-domestic disaster; and a thinking person can very readily make allowance
-for those faults which arise from want of reflection and education. I
-have seen the peace of a whole family disturbed by some trivial, cross
-accident, and hours spent in useless upbraidings about some mistake
-which would never have been thought of, but for the consequences that
-arose from it. An error in judgment or an accident should not be
-severely reprehended. It is a proof of wisdom to profit by experience,
-and not lament irremediable evils.
-
-A benevolent person must ever wish to see those around them comfortable,
-and try to be the cause of that comfort. The wide difference which
-education makes, I should suppose, would prevent familiarity in the way
-of equality; yet kindness must be shewn, if we are desirous that our
-domestics should be attached to our interest and persons. How pleasing
-it is to be attended with a smile of willingness, to be consulted when
-they are at a loss, and looked up to as a friend and benefactor when
-they are in distress. It is true we may often meet with ingratitude, but
-it ought not to discourage us; the refreshing showers of heaven
-fertilize the fields of the unworthy, as well as the just. We should
-nurse them in illness, and our superior judgment in those matters would
-often alleviate their pains.
-
-Above all, we owe them a good example. The ceremonials of religion, on
-their account, should be attended to; as they always reverence them to a
-superstitious degree, or else neglect them. We should not shock the
-faith of the meanest fellow-creature; nay more, we should comply with
-their prejudices; for their religious notions are so over-run with them,
-that they are not easily separated; and by trying to pluck up the tares,
-we may root up the wheat with them.
-
-The woman who gives way to caprice and ill-humour in the kitchen, cannot
-easily smooth her brow when her husband returns to his fire-side; nay,
-he may not only see the wrinkles of anger, but hear the disputes at
-second-hand. I heard a Gentleman say, it would break any man’s heart to
-hear his wife argue such a case. Men who are employed about things of
-consequence, think these affairs more insignificant than they really
-are; for the warmth with which we engage in any business increases its
-importance, and our not entering into them has the contrary effect.
-
-The behaviour of girls to servants is generally in extremes; too
-familiar or haughty. Indeed the one often produces the other, as a
-check, when the freedoms are troublesome.
-
-We cannot make our servants wise or good, but we may teach them to be
-decent and orderly; and order leads to some degree of morality.
-
-
-
-
- THE OBSERVANCE OF SUNDAY.
-
-
-The institution of keeping the seventh day holy was wisely ordered by
-Providence for two purposes. To rest the body, and call off the mind
-from the too eager pursuit of the shadows of this life, which, I am
-afraid, often obscure the prospect of futurity, and fix our thoughts on
-earth. A respect for this ordinance is, I am persuaded, of the utmost
-consequence to national religion. The vulgar have such a notion of it,
-that with them, going to church, and being religious, are almost
-synonymous terms. They are so lost in their senses, that if this day did
-not continually remind them, they would soon forget that there was a God
-in the world. Some forms are necessary to support vital religion, and
-without them it would soon languish, and at last expire.
-
-It is unfortunate, that this day is either kept with puritanical
-exactness, which renders it very irksome, or lost in dissipation and
-thoughtlessness. Either way is very prejudicial to the minds of children
-and servants, who ought not to be let run wild, not confined too
-strictly; and, above all, should not see their parents or masters
-indulge themselves in things which are generally thought wrong. I am
-fully persuaded, that servants have such a notion of card-playing, that
-where-ever it is practised of a Sunday their minds are hurt; and the
-barrier between good and evil in some measure broken down. Servants, who
-are accustomed to bodily labour, will fall into as laborious pleasures,
-if they are not gently restrained, and some substitute found out for
-them.
-
-Such a close attention to a family may appear to many very disagreeable;
-but the path of duty will be found pleasant after some time; and the
-passions being employed this way, will, by degrees, come under the
-subjection of reason. I mean not to be rigid, the obstructions which
-arise in the way of our duty, do not strike a speculatist; I know, too,
-that in the moment of action, even a well-disposed mind is often carried
-away by the present impulse, and that it requires some experience to be
-able to distinguish the dictates of reason from those of passion. The
-truth is seldom found out until the tumult is over; we then wake as from
-a dream, and when we survey what we have done, and feel the folly of it,
-we might call on reason and say, why sleepest thou? Yet though people
-are led astray by their passions, and even relapse after the most bitter
-repentance, they should not despair, but still try to regain the right
-road, and cultivate such habits as may assist them.
-
-I never knew much social virtue to reside in a house where the sabbath
-was grossly violated.
-
-
-
-
- ON THE MISFORTUNE OF FLUCTUATING PRINCIPLES.
-
-
-If we look for any comfort in friendship or society, we must associate
-with those who have fixed principles with respect to religion; for
-without them, repeated experience convinces me, the most shining
-qualities are unstable, and not to be depended on.
-
-It has often been a matter of surprise to me, that so few people examine
-the tenets of the religion they profess, or are christians through
-conviction. They have no anchor to rest on, nor any fixed chart to
-direct them in the doubtful voyage of life; how then can they hope to
-find the “haven of rest?” But they think not of it, and cannot be
-expected to forego present advantages. Noble actions must arise from
-noble thoughts and views; when they are confined to this world, they
-must be groveling.
-
-Faith, with respect to the promise of eternal happiness, can only enable
-us to combat with our passions, with a chance of victory. There are many
-who pay no attention to revelation, and more, perhaps, who have not any
-fixed belief in it. The sure word of comfort is neglected; and how
-people can live without it, I can scarcely conceive. For as the sun
-renews the face of nature, and chases away darkness from the world, so
-does this, still greater blessing, have the same effect on the mind, and
-enlightens and cheers it when every thing else fails.
-
-A true sense of our infirmities is the way to make us christians in the
-most extensive sense of the word. A mind depressed with a weight of
-weaknesses can only find comfort in the promises of the Gospel. The
-assistance there offered must raise the humble soul; and the account of
-the atonement that has been made, gives a rational ground for resting in
-hope until the toil of virtue is over, and faith has nothing to be
-exercised on.
-
-It is the fashion now for young men to be deists. And many a one has
-improper books sent adrift in a sea of doubts—of which there is no end.
-This is not a land of certainty; there is no confining the wandering
-reason, and but one clue to prevent its being lost in endless
-researches. Reason is indeed the heaven-lighted lamp in man, and may
-safely be trusted when not entirely depended on; but when it pretends to
-discover what is beyond its ken, it certainly stretches the line too
-far, and runs into absurdity. Some speculations are idle and others
-hurtful, as they raise pride, and turn the thoughts to subjects that
-ought to be left unexplored. With love and awe we should think of the
-High and Lofty One, that inhabiteth eternity! and not presume to say how
-He must exist who created us. How unfortunate it is, that man must sink
-into a brute, and not employ his mind, or else, by thinking, grow so
-proud, as often to imagine himself a superior being! It is not the
-doubts of profound thinkers that I here allude to, but the crude notions
-which young men sport away when together, and sometimes in the company
-of young women, to make them wonder at their superior wisdom! There
-cannot be any thing more dangerous to a mind, not accustomed to think,
-than doubts delivered in a ridiculing way. They never go deep enough to
-solve them, of course they stick by them; and though they might not
-influence their conduct, if a fear of the world prevents their being
-guilty of vices, yet their thoughts are not restrained, and they should
-be observed diligently, “For out of them are the issues of life.” A nice
-sense of right and wrong ought to be acquired, and then not only great
-vices will be avoided, but every little meanness; truth will reign in
-the inward parts, and mercy will attend her.
-
-I have indeed so much compassion for those young females who are
-entering into the world without fixed principles, that I would fain
-persuade them to examine a little into the matter. For though in the
-season of gaiety they may not feel the want of them, in that of distress
-where will they fly for succour? Even with this support, life is a labor
-of patience—a conflict; and the utmost we can gain is a small portion of
-peace, a kind of watchful tranquillity, that is liable to continual
-interruptions.
-
- “Then keep each passion down, however dear;
- “Trust me, the tender are the most severe.
- “Guard, while ’tis thine, thy philosophic ease,
- “And ask no joy but that of virtuous peace;
- “That bids defiance to the storms of fate:
- “High bliss is only for a higher state.”
- THOMSON.
-
-
-
-
- BENEVOLENCE.
-
-
-This first, and most amiable virtue, is often found in young persons
-that afterwards grow selfish; a knowledge of the arts of others, is an
-excuse to them for practicing the same; and because they have been
-deceived once, or have found objects unworthy of their charity—if any
-one appeals to their feelings, the formidable word Imposture instantly
-banishes the compassionate emotions, and silences conscience. I do not
-mean to confine the exercise of benevolence to alms-giving, though it is
-a very material part of it. Faith, hope, and charity ought to attend us
-in our passage through this world; but the two first leave us when we
-die, while the other is to be the constant inmate of our breast through
-all eternity. We ought not to suffer the heavenly spark to be quenched
-by selfishness; if we do, how can we expect it to revive, when the soul
-is disentangled from the body, and should be prepared for the realms of
-love? Forbearance and liberality of sentiment are the virtues of
-maturity. Children should be taught every thing in a positive way; and
-their own experience can only teach them afterwards to make distinctions
-and allowances. It is then the inferior part of benevolence that comes
-within their sphere of action, and it should not be suffered to sleep.
-Some part of the money that is allowed them for pocket-money, they
-should be encouraged to lay out this way, and the short-lived emotions
-of pity continually retraced ’till they grow into habits.
-
-I knew a child that would, when very young, sit down and cry if it met a
-poor person, after it had laid out its money in cakes; this occurred
-once or twice, and the tears were shed with additional distress every
-time; till at last it resisted the temptation, and saved the money.
-
-I think it a very good method for girls to have a certain allowance for
-cloaths. A mother can easily, without seeming to do it, observe how they
-spend it, and direct them accordingly. By these means they would learn
-the value of money, and be obliged to contrive. This would be a
-practical lesson of œconomy superior to all the theories that could be
-thought of. The having a fixed stipend, too, would enable them to be
-charitable, in the true sense of the word, as they would then give their
-own; and by denying themselves little ornaments, and doing their own
-work, they might increase the sum appropriated to charitable purposes.
-
-A lively principle of this kind would also overcome indolence; for I
-have known people wasteful and penurious at the same time; but the
-wastefulness was to spare themselves trouble, and others only felt the
-effects of their penury, to make the balance even.
-
-Women too often confine their love and charity to their own families.
-They fix not in their minds the precedency of moral obligations, or make
-their feelings give way to duty. Goodwill to all the human race should
-dwell in our bosoms, nor should love to individuals induce us to violate
-this first of duties, or make us sacrifice the interest of any
-fellow-creature, to promote that of another, whom we happen to be more
-partial to. A parent, under distressed circumstances, should be
-supported, even though it should prevent our saving a fortune for a
-child; nay more, should they be both in distress at the same time, the
-prior obligation should be first discharged.
-
-Under this head may be included the treatment of animals. Over them many
-children tyrannize with impunity; and find amusement in tormenting, or
-wantonly killing, any insect that comes in their way, though it does
-them no injury. I am persuaded, if they were told stories of them, and
-led to take an interest in their welfare and occupations, they would be
-tender to them; as it is, they think man the only thing of consequence
-in the creation. I once prevented a girl’s killing ants, for sport, by
-adapting Mr. Addison’s account of them to her understanding. Ever after
-she was careful not to tread on them, lest she should distress the whole
-community.
-
-Stories of insects and animals are the first that should rouse the
-childish passions, and exercise humanity; and then they will rise to
-man, and from him to his Maker.
-
-
-
-
- CARD-PLAYING.
-
-
-Card-playing is now the constant amusement, I may say employment, of
-young and old, in genteel life. After all the fatigue of the toilet,
-blooming girls are set down to card-tables, and the most unpleasing
-passions called forth. Avarice does not wait for grey hairs and
-wrinkles, but marks a countenance where the loves and graces ought to
-revel. The hours that should be spent in improving the mind, or in
-innocent mirth, are thus thrown away; and if the stake is not
-considerable enough to rouse the passions, lost in insipidity, and a
-habit acquired which may lead to serious mischief. Not to talk of
-gaming, many people play for more than they can well afford to lose, and
-this sours their temper. Cards are the universal refuge to which the
-idle and the ignorant resort, to pass life away, and to keep their
-inactive souls awake, by the tumult of hope and fear.
-
- “Unknown to them, when sensual pleasures cloy,
- “To fill the languid pause with finer joy;
- “Unknown those powers that raise the soul to flame,
- “Catch every nerve, and vibrate through the frame.”
-
-And, of course, this is their favourite amusement. Silent, stupid
-attention appears necessary; and too frequently little arts are
-practised which debase the character, and at best give it a trifling
-turn. Certainly nothing can be more absurd than permitting girls to
-acquire a fondness for cards. In youth the imagination is lively, and
-novelty gives charms to every scene; pleasure almost obtrudes itself,
-and the pliable mind and warm affections are easily wrought on. They
-want not those resources, which even respectable and sensible persons
-sometimes find necessary, when they see life, as it is unsatisfactory,
-and cannot anticipate pleasures, which they know will fade when nearly
-viewed. Youth is the season of activity, and should not be lost in
-listlessness. Knowledge ought to be acquired, a laudable ambition
-encouraged; and even the errors of passion may produce useful
-experience, expand the faculties, and teach them to know their own
-hearts. The most shining abilities, and the most amiable dispositions of
-the mind, require culture, and a proper situation, not only to ripen and
-improve them, but to guard them against the perversions of vice, and the
-contagious influence of bad examples.
-
-
-
-
- THE THEATRE.
-
-
-The amusements which this place afford are generally supposed the most
-rational, and are really so to a cultivated mind; yet one that is not
-quite formed may learn affectation at the theatre. Many of our admired
-tragedies are too full of declamation, and a false display of the
-passions. A heroine is often made to grieve ten or twenty years, and yet
-the unabated sorrow has not given her cheeks a pallid hue; she still
-inspires the most violent passion in every beholder, and her own yields
-not to time. The prominent features of a passion are easily copied,
-while the more delicate touches are overlooked. That start of
-Cordelia’s, when her father says, “I think that Lady is my daughter,”
-has affected me beyond measure, when I could unmoved hear Calista
-describe the cave in which she would live “Until her tears had washed
-her guilt away.”
-
-The principal characters are too frequently made to rise above human
-nature, or sink below it; and this occasions many false conclusions. The
-chief use of dramatic performances should be to teach us to discriminate
-characters; but if we rest in separating the good from the bad, we are
-very superficial observers. May I venture a conjecture?—I cannot help
-thinking, that every human creature has some spark of goodness, which
-their long-suffering and benevolent Father gives them an opportunity of
-improving, though they may perversely smother it before they cease to
-breathe.
-
-Death is treated in too slight a manner; and sought, when
-disappointments occur, with a degree of impatience, which proves that
-the main end of life has not been considered. That fearful punishment of
-sin, and convulsion of nature, is too often exposed to public view.
-Until very lately I never had the courage even to look at a person dying
-on the stage. The hour of death is not the time for the display of
-passions; nor do I think it natural it should: the mind is then
-dreadfully disturbed, and the trifling sorrows of this world not thought
-of. The deaths on the stage, in spite of the boasted sensibility of the
-age, seem to have much the same effect on a polite audience, as the
-execution of malefactors has on the mob that follow them to Tyburn.
-
-The worst species of immorality is inculcated, and life (which is to
-determine the fate of eternity) thrown away when a kingdom or mistress
-is lost. Patience and submission to the will of Heaven, and those
-virtues which render us useful to society, are not brought forward to
-view; nor can they occasion those surprising turns of fortune which most
-delight vulgar minds. The almost imperceptible progress of the passions,
-which Shakespeare has so finely delineated, are not sufficiently
-observed, though the start of the actor is applauded. Few tragedies, I
-think, will please a person of discernment, and their sensibility is
-sure to be hurt.
-
-Young persons, who are happily situated, do well to enter into
-fictitious distress; and if they have any judicious person to direct
-their judgment, it may be improved while their hearts are melted. Yet I
-would not have them confine their compassion to the distresses
-occasioned by love; and perhaps their feelings might more profitably be
-roused, if they were to see sometimes the complicated, misery of
-sickness and poverty, and weep for the beggar instead of the king.
-
-Comedy is not now so censurable as it was some years ago; and a chaste
-ear is not often shocked with indecencies. When follies are pointed out,
-and vanity ridiculed, it may be very improving; and perhaps the stage is
-the only place where ridicule is useful.
-
-What I have said is certainly only applicable to those who go to see the
-play, and not to shew themselves and waste time. The most insignificant
-amusement will afford instruction to thinking minds, and the most
-rational will be lost on a vacant one.
-
-Remarks on the actors are frequently very tiresome. It is a fashionable
-topic, and a thread-bare one; it requires great abilities, and a
-knowledge of nature, to be a competent judge; and those who do not enter
-into the spirit of the author, are not qualified to converse with
-confidence on the subject.
-
-
-
-
- PUBLIC PLACES.
-
-
-Under this head I rank all those places, which are open to an
-indiscriminate resort of company. There seems at present such a rage for
-pleasure, that when adversity does not call home the thoughts, the whole
-day is mostly spent in preparations and plans, or in actual dissipation.
-Solitude appears insupportable, and domestic comfort stupid. And though
-the amusements may not always be relished, the mind is so enervated it
-cannot exert itself to find out any other substitute. An immoderate
-fondness for dress is acquired, and many fashionable females spend half
-the night in going from one place to another to display their finery,
-repeat commonplace compliments, and raise envy in their acquaintance
-whom they endeavour to outshine. Women, who are engaged in those scenes,
-must spend more time in dress than they ought to do, and it will occupy
-their thoughts when they should be better employed.
-
-In the fine Lady how few traits do we observe of those affections which
-dignify human nature! If she has any maternal tenderness, it is of a
-childish kind. We cannot be too careful not to verge on this character;
-though she lives many years she is still a child in understanding, and
-of so little use to society, that her death would scarcely be observed.
-
-Dissipation leads to poverty, which cannot be patiently borne by those
-who have lived on the vain applause of others, on account of outward
-advantages; these were the things they imagined of most consequence, and
-of course they are tormented with false shame, when by a reverse of
-fortune they are deprived of them.
-
-A young innocent girl, when she first enters into gay scenes, finds her
-spirits so raised by them, that she would often be lost in delight, if
-she was not checked by observing the behaviour of a class of females who
-attend those places. What a painful train of reflections do then arise
-in the mind, and convictions of the vice and folly of the world are
-prematurely forced on it. It is no longer a paradise, for innocence is
-not there; the taint of vice poisons every enjoyment, and affectation,
-though despised, is very contagious. If these reflections do not occur,
-languor follows the extraordinary exertions, and weak minds fall a prey
-to imaginary distress, to banish which they are obliged to take as a
-remedy what produced the disease.
-
-We talk of amusements unbending the mind; so they ought; yet even in the
-hours of relaxation we are acquiring habits. A mind accustomed to
-observe can never be quite idle, and will catch improvement on all
-occasions. Our pursuits and pleasures should have the same tendency, and
-every thing concur to prepare us for a state of purity and happiness.
-There vice and folly will not poison our pleasures; our faculties will
-expand; and not mistake their objects; and we shall no longer “see as
-through a glass darkly, but know, even as we are known.”
-
-
- FINIS.
-
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
-
-
-
- TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES
-
-
- 1. P. 97, changed “is was sufficient” to “it was sufficient”.
- 2. Silently corrected obvious typographical errors and variations in
- spelling.
- 3. Retained archaic, non-standard, and uncertain spellings as printed.
- 4. Enclosed italics font in _underscores_.
- 5. Denoted superscripts by a caret before a single superscript
- character or a series of superscripted characters enclosed in
- curly braces, e.g. M^r. or M^{ister}.
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