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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..bdd0096 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #68113 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/68113) diff --git a/old/68113-0.txt b/old/68113-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index fb39a03..0000000 --- a/old/68113-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,2552 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg eBook of Jingles, by Winifred Sackville Stoner, -Jr. - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you -will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before -using this eBook. - -Title: Jingles - -Author: Winifred Sackville Stoner, Jr. - -Illustrator: Karl Kae Knecht - -Release Date: May 17, 2022 [eBook #68113] - -Language: English - -Produced by: Charlene Taylor, Jwala Kumar Sista and the Online - Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This - file was produced from images generously made available by - The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - -*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JINGLES *** - - - Transcriber's Notes - - 1. Table of Contents with title-wise navigation-links, added by the - transcriber. - - 2. Typographical errors and hyphenation inconsistencies were silently - corrected. - - 3. Some illustrations appearing before chapter heading in the - original, are placed next to heading of relevant chapter. - - 4. The text version is coded for italics and other mark-ups i.e., - (a) Italics are indicated thus _italic_; - (b) Smallcaps thus +Caps+; and - (c) Images are indicated as [Illustration: (with narration...)] - - * * * * * - - - - - JINGLES - - - - - JINGLES - - [Illustration: decorative mark] - - WRITTEN FOR DEAR FRIENDS - BY - WINIFRED SACKVILLE STONER, Jr. - (When five and six years of age) - - [Illustration: decorative mark] - - ILLUSTRATED BY - KARL KAE KNECHT - - Copyright 1909 Smith & Butterfield, Publishers - Winifred Sackville Stoner, Jr. Evansville, Ind. - - - Table of Contents. - - Chapter Page - - A Christmas Wish For All My Friends 6 - - PREFACE 7 - - _AUTHOR AT ONE YEAR OLD_ _Plate 1_ - - The Pet's Christmas Carol 9 - - A Great Surprise 9 - - Santa's Reindeer In The Sky 10 - - Nissen, The Santa Claus of Norway 13 - - After The Fourth Was Over 14 - - A Kitten Gone To Waste 15 - - The New Baby 15 - - Woes Caused By Whooping Bugs 16 - - How Simple Simon Became Wise 16 - - _AUTHOR AT TWO YEARS OLD_ _Plate 2_ - - Too Many Dolls 17 - - The Cat Extincted The Canary 17 - - A Boy's Complaint 18 - - Koppa After Pi 18 - - A Whingwang Sonnet Of An Easter Bonnet 19 - - The Giant Arithmos 20 - - Good Weather Assured 20 - - Roosevelt Complimented By Mama Lion 21 - - All Dentists Go To Heaven 21 - - The Time Of His Life 22 - - King Teddy, The Fearless 23 - - Good Bye To Teddy Bears 23 - - Cats A Kissin (Catechism) 23 - - Hens 24 - - _AUTHOR AT THREE YEARS OLD_ _Plate 3_ - - Please Grandpa, Croak 25 - - Wee Willie's First Hair Cut 25 - - Wise Replies 25 - - It Takes A Cigar A Long Time To Wear Out 26 - - An Esperanto Poem Plain To All 26 - - Answers, Not Questions, Cause Trouble 27 - - The Pure Blooded Pup 28 - - Too ticklish to Count His Ribs 30 - - The Young Mail Carrier 31 - - On Thanksgiving 31 - - Living Valentines Presented By Cupid 32 - - _AUTHOR AT FOUR YEARS OLD_ _Plate 4_ - - Universal Peace 34 - - All The World Cries 35 - - Could Only Ask Questions 35 - - Let The Bumble Be 36 - - Take That Gum from Your mouth And Put Your feet In 37 - - The Tersest Bathing Suit 37 - - Furs Lined With Kittens 38 - - A Boy's Description Of A Goat 38 - - A Riddle 39 - - Grandpa's Head Cums Frew His Hair 39 - - Susan Rewarded For Twenty Year's Service 40 - - _AUTHOR AT FIVE YEARS OLD_ _Plate 5_ - - Bridget Makes Split Pea Soup 41 - - Lazy White Men Sit While Flying Through The Air 41 - - To Save Him From A Whipping 42 - - A Skillet In Society (Alias A Chafing Dish) 43 - - Autos Change Good Luck 44 - - A Boy Who Was Hero And villian 45 - - Wise Ignatius Escapes A Whipping 46 - - Nervous Jelly 47 - - One Johnson More, One Smith Less 48 - - _AUTHOR AT SIX YEARS OLD_ _Plate 6_ - - Pride 49 - - Job Smarter Than Modern Babies 50 - - Only Naughty Children See "Spooks" On Hallow'een 51 - - Six Year Old Girl Writes Poem Hoping To Save Forest Trees 52 - - An Appeal To The Fairies 52 - - -[Illustration: Illustrator writes and signs as: _Best Wishes to my -little friend, Miss Winifred S. Stoner Jr., whose delightful Jingles -I like to illustrate_--_K. K. Knecht_] - - - [Illustration: THE AUTHOR] - -The author of these little rhymes, which have been previously -published in "The Evansville Courier" and several other publications, -was born in Norfolk, Virginia, August 19, 1902. From her babyhood -days she has been a great lover of poetry and began composing -original rhymes when but three years of age. - - - - - A Christmas Wish - For All My Friends - - - While Christmas bells are chiming, oh, may there come to you - A dear sweet little fairy, who's always good and true; - The little HAPPY FAIRY, who drives away dull care, - And makes all things upon the earth seem ever bright and fair. - - She'll whisper to good Santa to bring what you most wish; - So if you have been longing for a fine pudding dish, - He will not, as in by-gone years, forget and bring to you - Something that you do not want, though beautiful and new. - - The HAPPY FAIRY'S MAGIC is in this wondrous leaf, - Which drives away all "bogies," and banishes all grief; - So if you would be happy, wealthy, wise and well. - Kiss the MAGIC WISHING LEAF from HAPPY FAIRY'S DELL. - - - - - PREFACE - - -This little book is dedicated to all of my relatives and to the -following friends: - -Mrs. Lucy Dillard Tabb Okeson, Miss Fannie F. Sams. Mr. and Mrs. -William Webb, Misses Blanche, Helen and Wydie Webb, Mrs. William -Sharp, Mrs. Mc Alpine, Miss Rebekah Mc Alpine, Mrs. John C. Taylor, Dr. -and Mrs. Adams, Walter and Forestall Adams, Miss Isabelle Nusbaum, -Virginia Leigh Morris, Bertram and Virginius Nusbaum, Mr. Albert -Warrington, Neely Warrington, Mr. and Mrs. M. G. Nusbaum, Mrs. -Charles Rowland, Elsie Rowland, Fred Riddle, Barry and Wilson Dodson, -Eugenie and Richard Jones, Christine Neubauer, of Norfolk, Virginia. - -Doctor Zamenhof, Warsaw, Poland; Prof. George Macloskie, LL. D. D. -Sc., of Princeton University; Mrs. George Macloskia, Princeton, N. -J.; M. Edmond Privat, Geneva, Switzerland; Mr. Sharon O. Brown, -Providence, R. I.; Mr. Charles E. Randall, Seattle, Washington; -Mrs. William Westcott, Holley, N. Y.; Mr. and Mrs. William Warren, -Newburgh, Ind. - -Mr. Arthur Baker, Mr. and Mrs. Frederick Guthrie, Mrs. A. R. -Hornbrook, Dr. Walter H. Fox, Miss Berthe Papot, Miss Dorothy -Millican, Miss Polly Young, of Chicago, Illinois. - -Prof. Edwin C. Reed, Washington, D. C.; Mrs. Wilbur F. Crafts, of -the Christian Herald: Dr. D. O. S. Lowell, of Roxbury Latin School; -Rev. Horace Dutton, of the Christian Endeavor World; Dr. William -Gray Nowell, Mr. John Fogg Twombly, Miss Eugenie Ohman, of Boston, -Mass.; Edwin and Dorothy Ehrman, of Rockport, Ind.; Dr. W. Addis, -Guaymas, Mexico; Mrs. Maybelle Anderson, Haverhill, Mass.; Miss -Ella Thomas, Monterey, Cal.; Dorothy Kirk, DesMoines, Iowa, Miss -J. E. Hamand, Schaller, Iowa; Mrs. Annie H. McDermid, Fontanelle, -Iowa; Mrs. Robert Winthrop Barr and Nelson Barr, Chattanooga, Tenn.; -Mrs. Maria T. Bird, Rockland, Maine: Mr. Harry Warren, Mr. Frank -Kirkpatrick, Cincinnati, Ohio; Miss Ruth Rickinson, Columbus, Ohio; -Dr. Clara Todson and Mr. Joseph Burila, Elgin, Ill.; Mr. and Mrs. -Ellis Dungan, Barton, Ohio; Mr. Herbert M. Scott, Moundsville, W. -Va.; Miss Mary F. Kelly Brambleton, Va.; Mrs. W. W. Davies, Richmond, -Va.; Earl Stratton, Jamestown, N. Y.; Miss Lois L. White and Mrs. W. -D. Christman, Washington, Pa.; Max Bosquet, Roanne et Loire, France; -Miss Emily Allen, Miss Jessie and Mary Eggleson, Dr. Levi Old, of -Norfolk, Va. - -Mrs. Linna Hennig Sherman, Miss Adaline Sherman, Mrs. Flora Williams, -Mrs. Alma Shafer, Dr. W. S. Hamilton, Prof. Walter Ross, Prof. C. C. -Brilles, Mr. and Mrs. C. M. Vester, Mrs. J. W. Bryan, Miss Elizabeth -Dean, Miss Margaret O'Brien, of Wheeling, W. Va. - -Mrs. John Speed, Memphis. Tenn.; Mr. Frank Royster, Colorado Springs, -Col.; Dr. Chase, Galveston, Texas; Prof. John E. McFadyen, Mr. and -Mrs. Max Arno Frind, Mr. Robert Sangster, of Toronto, Canada. - -Mrs. Lyde Morrow Petty, Miss Edith Edeburn, Leicester and Kenneth -Fisher, of Pittsburg, Pa.; Mr. and Mrs. Henry D. King, Mr. James G. -Diller, of Brooklyn, N. Y.; Lieutenant Arthur Crenshaw, U. S. N.; -Mrs. Arthur Crenshaw, Shanghai, China; Major H. W. Yemans, U. S. A.; -Capt. G. W. Kirkpatrick, U. S. A.; Francisko Yamota, Osake, Japan. - -Prof. Clayton R. Bowen, Mrs. Margaret Bowen, Meadville, Pa.; Misses -Mame, Jennie and Gwen Leo, Master Chap Leo, Mrs. L. H. Hall, Mr. and -Mrs. Frank Montgomery, Gertrude, Jean and Richard Montgomery. Mrs. -Thompson, Mrs. Lloyd, Mr. J. C. Spencer, Miss Eleanor Long, of Erie, -Pa. - -In Evansville, Indiana: The Editors of "THE COURIER," Mr. Henry C. -Murphy, Mr. Howard Roosa, Mr. Percy Carroll, Mr. Karl Kae Knecht, -Master John Speed Murphy, Miss Josephine Greene, Mr. Alfred Greene, -Master Howard Roosa, Miss O'Hara, Mary Sisson, Virginia Whittemore, -Marjory Moore, Alice Ashby, Martha Denby, Margaret Ruston, Virginia -Clarke, Miss Irene Jenner, Lawrence Jenner, Horace and Fred Cross, -Fritz and Ralph Dryborough, Wesley and John Downer, Oscar Uhl, -Jep Hardig, Raymond Chesley, Walter Weber, Misses Anna and Ella -Runcie, Edna and Alma Speck, Margaret Bacon, Loraine Cutler, Sallie -Whittemore, Salibelle Royster, Janie Sonntag, Katherine Imbusch, -Otilda, Margaret and Katharine Goslee, Harriet Knauth, Katherine -Lewis, Halene Busse, Caroline Patrick, Suzette Dunlevy, Katherine -Wellman, Dorothy Hannett, Mrs. M. O. Fowler, Mr. and Mrs. Walter -Runcie, Dr. L. D. Brose, Mr. Marshall White, Edgar and Melville -Garvin, Dr. and Mrs. W. L. Royster, Ruth Helen Birt, Charles -Sherwood, Mr. Neal Waledn, Mary, Frances, Helen and Hugh Harris, -Charlie Donnelly, Glenn Kirkpatrick, Bertha White. - -Mr. and Mrs. W. F. Wocher, Mrs. Katherine Brown, Mrs. John Candee -Dean, Mrs. William Turner, Miss Mary McEvoy, Miss Ethel Black -Kealing, of Indianapolis, Ind. - -Mrs. Anna Chase Brainard, Dr. S. Y. Howell, Mr. Edward F. Graham, Mr. -Russell R. Johnson, of Buffalo, N. Y., Dr. and Mrs. W. Baker, Terre -Haute, Ind. - - - Plate 1: [Illustration: AUTHOR AT ONE YEAR OLD] - - - - - The Pet's Christmas Carol - - [Illustration: Pet's Christmas Carol] - - - "Tweet-tweet-tweet!" sang the canary, - Which meant that he was very merry, - Because his little mistress Nell, - On Christmas eve had fed him well. - - "Bow-wow-wow!" sang the gay young pup, - "My master's gone away to sup, - But though he won't be here for tea, - Just see the meal he left for me!" - - "Mew-mew-mew!" sang the mamma cat, - "Such milk as this will make me fat, - And oh, I feel so very gay - This cold and frosty Christmas day." - - Each mamma cow sang "Moo-moo-moo!" - And gentle dove sang "Coo-coo-coo!" - And every horse and sheep and pig, - And duck and chicken, small and big, - A carol sang on Christmas eve, - Because a FEAST each did receive. - - - - - A Great Surprise - - (Written for Mother and Daddy.) - - - On the nineteenth day of August, in the year of nineteen two, - Most kind and gracious Madame Stork right over Norfolk flew, - And brought to my dear mother there a wonderful surprise, - A little red brown baby girl with large blackberry eyes. - Now, mother she had asked the stork to bring to her much joy, - And drop a bundle at her door containing a wee boy, - But when the stork made a mistake and brought just little me, - She thought that I was better far than any boy could be. - And wrapped me in the blanket which she'd planned for my wee brother, - And which my dear "MA MIE" had knit to help my busy mother. - She changed the name of Lionel to little Winifred, - And all the things for brother planned, she gave to me instead. - - - - - Santa's Reindeer In The Sky - - (Written for Grandmother Sackville.) - - [Illustration: SANTA'S AEROPLANE] - - - Long, long ago, before this earth had any girls and boys - To hang their stockings on the shelf, expecting Christmas toys, - Good Santa was a big white cloud that floated in the sky; - if you had lived in those old days, you'd seen him floating by. - - But when the children came to rule upon good Mother Earth, - She took kind Santa from the sky and made him God of Mirth; - To bring at every Christmas time good gifts to girls and boys - And make them all so happy with a lot of lovely toys. - - Far, far among the icebergs, in the cold and freezing zone, - She built for him a palace, where he lives almost alone, - With only good old Mrs. Claus to keep him company, - And sometimes Cousin Nicholas for two days or for three. - - Wise Mother Earth she knew this clime would suit good Santa well, - For here no foolish, idle folks would ever come to dwell; - Nor pay the good Saint visits which would waste his precious time, - While he could work much faster here than in a warmer clime. - - But never did he suffer from the icebergs at the Pole, - As Fairies kept his fireplace all full of red hot coal; - Or heaped bright burning logs on it as full as it could hold, - So Santa never felt at all old Jack Frost's biting cold. - - Likewise these Fairies brought to him and his most faithful spouse, - Just everything that they could need to keep a cozy house, - And even cooked their victuals and brought them every day - Exactly at the proper time, upon a huge hot tray. - - And after they had eaten all the dainties on the tiny, - The good kind fairies they would come and take the tray away; - So Mrs. Claus had no excuse for being cross or sad, - Since no experience she had had with Bridgets getting mad. - - When Santa finished all his toys, he put them in a sack, - Where he intended carrying them upon his great broad back, - But Mother Earth surprised the saint and to his palace led - Eight lovely prancing reindeer and a large commodious sled. - - These reindeer were the cousins of swift Pegasus, the steed - Who helped the hero Perseus when he was in great need; - And like the flying hero horse, they lived up in the sky, - 'Till Mother Earth had need of them to help old Santa fly. - - And so on every Christmas eve for full ten hundred years, - Good Santa and his reindeer fleet have banished childrens' tears, - By bringing them 'most all the gifts their little hearts could wish, - And filling stockings, shoes and plates and great round pudding dish. - - But when last Christmas came around, good Mother Earth she said, - "Dear Santa I have something fine for you to use instead - Of your good, faithful reindeer and your big old fashioned sled, - For here's a lovely aeroplane all painted shining red." - - The wise old lady then declared that he could safely fly - With this machine 'most anywhere away up in the sky, - And travel far, far faster than reindeer who were fleet - But stumbled sometimes on the roofs made slippery with sleet. - - The aeroplane could carry well a larger load of toys, - So he could visit more good girls and also little boys, - Who live in far off heathen lands where everyone's a sinner, - But that's no reason each should do without a Christmas dinner. - - With this machine he'd save some time to look out for each pet - Of all the little girls and boys as they so oft forget - To treat their pets most kindly upon the Christmas morn - In memory of the Saviour, who on this day was born. - - And likewise all the horses, the cows and pigs and sheep, - For men so seldom think of them when Christmas time they keep; - And even wild, fierce animals, and fishes in the sea, - Should all be made quite happy at Christmas time to be. - - "I do not like this plan at all of giving up my sled - And my good faithful reindeer," so good old Santa said. - But Mother Earth she laughed at him and said she would repay - The reindeer, whom she would send home, straight to the milky way. - - But Santa was old fashioned and had great fears to fly - Without his sled and reindeer, he'd used in years gone by, - And begged that on his maiden trip these true old friends to take - To help him should the aeroplane prove but a wicked fake. - - The laughing Earth she granted him this very small request, - And early on glad Christmas eve (the eve of all most blest), - He started forth upon his trip, did good old Santa, dear, - Guiding his Wright aeroplane with feelings of great fear. - - But Mother Earth showed she was wise and knew just what was best - To help the good old tired saint while on his children quest; - And fast the good Wright aeroplane it flew both low and high, - So Santa took the Earth's advice, and though he heaved a sigh, - - He dropped the poor old worn out sled as he was passing by, - And people said, who saw it fall, "A METEOR FROM THE SKY!" - Then kissing each good reindeer, he bade them all farewell, - And left them in the MILKY WAY, forever there to dwell. - - And you, my little children, who have heard the tiny hoofs - Of the little flying steeds pattering on the roofs, - If you would like to catch a glimpse of Santa's good reindeer, - Then wait until it's dark some night, and when the sky is clear, - You'll see them very plainly in the broad light MILKY WAY, - And there for all the time to come, these steeds will romp and play. - - [Illustration: Santa's reindeer & Little children] - - - * * * * * - -Written for my Godmother, Mrs. Lucy Dillard Tabb Okeson, of Norfolk, Va. - - - When I was one year old, - So often I've been told, - Dear "Ma Mie" sang to me - This cunning poetry: - "Mousie, pousie, wousie, - In the Boush Street Housie," - And always from that time - I've loved to make a rhyme, - So if it be my fate - To write a poem great, - Then dearest, sweet "Ma Mie," - The praise belongs to thee. - - - - - Nissen, The Santa Claus of Norway - - [Illustration: +Nissen+] - - (The story told in this rhyme was sent to the author by her -globe-trotting friend, Mrs. William Westcott, from Christiana, Norway.) - - - How glad I am that I was born in this land very dear, - Where children have a Santa Claus of whom they have no fear; - A Santa who is always kind, remembering one and all, - When every year at Christmas time, he pays us all a call. - - In far away chill Norway, there NISSEN is the name - Of the Christmas visitor who bears good Santa's fame; - But he's a naughty brownie, so short and very small; - Not a bit like Santa, who is large and fat and tall. - - But like our good gift giver, his beard is long and white, - And he wears a coat of furs and many colors bright; - But instead of bringing goodies to good girls and to boys, - Nice new clothes and books and games and lots of wondrous toys. - - He expects that all the big folks and also little ones, - Should leave his favorite dishes, such as puddings, cakes and buns, - Outside of every doorway, so that he may eat at will - Of these luscious dainties until he has had his fill. - - Then after eating all the cakes his "Tummy-tum" can hold, - He milks the cows and splits the wood (at least so I've been told), - But never thinks to bring nice gifts to little girls and boys, - Whose parents have to trim their trees and buy them all their toys. - - Besides, this naughty NISSEN is cross at times and bad, - And does all sorts of horrid tricks, which I think very sad - At Christmas, when we all should be so kind to one another - And treat each person whom we meet as if he were our brother. - - But NISSEN steals away the cows and even horses fleet, - From all the people who forget to bake him puddings sweet; - And if above a whisper one should dare to speak or sing - About this cranky fellow, then this evil he will bring - Upon the one who dared to throw, his name upon the breeze, - As from that time the guilty one must sneeze and sneeze and sneeze. - - Now in our land we sing loud praise of Santa all the time, - And tell about his goodness great, in prose and jingling rhyme; - And yet it seems the more we sing about the jolly elf, - The more he brings each year to us upon the mantel shelf. - - But children in far Norway are better girls and boys - Than we who live in this fair land and think so much of toys, - That we forget about the pets while feeding our own selves, - Like thoughtless, greedy little pigs or naughty selfish elves. - - While Norway children in the fall they work to gather corn, - And save it for the birds they feed on every Christmas morn, - So we should follow in their steps and feed the wee birds crumbs, - Before we start to feast ourselves on Christmas sugar plums. - - - - - After The Fourth Was Over - - (Written for Uncle Lionel Sackville.) - - [Illustration: NISSEN PLAYING TRICKS] - - - After the Fourth was over, after the play was done, - Poor little John and Willie forgot that they'd had some fun; - John, with his eyes all bandaged, Willie with one eye gone, - Had changed from joyous boys, who rose with the FOURTH'S bright dawn, - Determined to shoot great cannons and frighten some silly girls, - To tie big crackers to dogs' tails, and make the pin wheels whirl. - - Tommy with one hand bound up and with a bepowdered face, - Alex with two burned fingers and bones nearly all out of place; - Edgar with one leg broken and poor little Peter with two, - Thought that they'd had enough sorrow to last them a whole life - through, - But mother, who heard them crying, while soothing her darlings to - sleep, - Was thankful that some of the pieces she yet was able to keep, - And sad for the weeping mother of poor naughty, unlucky Jim, - As the booming JULY CELEBRATION blew the whole head off of him. - - - - - A Kitten Gone To Waste - -(This story was told to the author by Mrs. William Warren, of Newburgh, - Indiana.) - - [Illustration: Kitten gone to waste] - - - When little Mary Alice was only three years old, - She went upon a visit to Aunt Maria Hold, - A lady who was noted for saving everything, - From gold and silver dollars down to a turkey wing. - - She soon taught Mary Alice to never throw away - A single bit of anything which might be used "some day," - And Alice, who was clever, she learned to put away - All bits of ribbon, cloth and lace, and chicken feathers gay. - - Each day she kept quite busy hunting something more - Which she could take to Auntie or add to her own store; - And one day in excitement, she ran in greatest haste, - Crying, "Oh, dear Auntie, sumfins don to waste! - A perfectlee dood kitty is thrown out on the dump - Of the kitchen ash-pile, behind the garden pump!" - - [Illustration: decorative end-mark] - - - - - The New Baby - - (Written for Alfred Greene, Jr., Evansville, Indiana.) - - - When Alfred saw the baby wee the stork to him had brought, - He stood quite silent for a while and thought and thought and thought - Until he'd solved the problem about the CURIOUS ONE - Who'd traveled far from Storkland, though she couldn't walk nor run. - Then to his mother he declared in accents of dismay, - "Dear mother we must send this kid back to her home to-day, - 'Cause someone's cheated us I know and brought us an old child - With bald head and without a tooth and like an Indian wild." - Whenever it begins to cry it almost lifts the roof, - So mother, dear, I think 'tis best for you to keep aloof - From the old ugly Indian thing and send it to Stork-land, - Then you and I'll be glad again and go to hear the band. - - - - - Woes Caused By Whooping Bugs - - (Written for Cousin Harvey Stoner, Jr.) - - [Illustration: Woes caused by bugs] - - - If you don't believe that whooping cough causes lots of woe, - Just catch a few of whooping germs and then I guess you'll know - That whoopee-whoop! and wheepee-wheeps! are not one bit of fun, - When you see others playing games where all must jump and run, - For if you jump or if you run, you start the whoop-oop-oop! - And even when you're tired you can't sleep for the croup, - Caused by the awful whooping bugs, which lurk within your throat - And make your voice sound hoarser than the singing of a goat. - - For fear of spreading whooping-bugs you certainly can't go - To Sunday-school or other school, or even to a show, - But you must stay at home ALONE from three to six long weeks, - And listen to your croaking voice, which whoops and sometimes squeaks. - So therefore take the good advice of a little girl who knows, - And stay away from WHOOPING-COUGH, which causes lots of woes. - - [Illustration: decorative end-mark] - - - - - How Simple Simon Became Wise - - (Written for "St. Nicholas," February, 1909.) - - - Simple Simon met young Heiman reading from a book, - Said Simple Simon to young Heiman, "Let me have a look?" - Said young Heiman to Simple Simon, "I will not selfish be, - My great delight, ST. NICHOLAS, I'll gladly let you see." - - Then Simple Simon and young Heiman spent an hour or two - Reading from this wondrous book, so full of all that's true, - And when they'd finished Simon lad of Mother Goose's fame, - By virtue of his knowledge great, WISE SIMON, he became. - - - Plate 2: [Illustration: AUTHOR AT TWO YEARS OLD] - - - - - Too Many Dolls - - (Written for Wydie Webb, of Norfolk, Va.) - - - Miss Margaret Mary Elizabeth May, - Had one hundred dollies with which she could play, - There were bisque dolls and wax dolls and dolls with real hair, - Red dolls and black dolls and dolls that were fair, - Fat dolls and plump dolls and dolls in the style, - Hipless and jointless and dressed in a smile; - Rag dolls and wood dolls and celluloid boys, - China and paper and Jumping Jack Joys; - Irish and Scotch dolls and dolls from Paris, - And all of the strange lands from over the sea; - Japies and Chinese and dark Esquimos, - Dutchies and Germans and cutest Dagoes; - Dollies from Egypt and dollies from Spain, - Hindoos and Hebrews and one little Dane. - From Poland and Russia they'd traveled afar - By railroad and steamer and also by car - To join other dollies from Johnnie Bull's home, - And lovely Italians from far away Rome. - From Greenland and Iceland, Norway and Greece, - The string of these dollies seemed never to cease. - But Margaret Mary Elizabeth May - Could never decide with which doll to play, - So she was not happy as poor little Sue, - Who in her doll family had only two - Wretched rag dollies without any hair, - But which she considered a most lovely pair, - And these ugly dollies they gave her delight, - As with them she played from morning 'till night. - - [Illustration: decorative end-mark] - - - - - The Cat Extincted The Canary - - (Written for Josephine Greene, Evansville, Ind.) - - [Illustration: Naughty pussy cat extincted the canary] - - - "Josephine," asked the teacher, "can you tell to me - Any bird that's now extinct, but used on earth to be?" - - "Oh, yes, Miss Jane," said Josephine, "our sweet canary, Jim, - Because the naughty pussy cat she quite extincted him." - - - - - A Boy's Complaint - - (Written for John Speed Murphy, Evansville, Indiana.) - - [Illustration: "BABEE"] - - Grandma calls me Johnnie, father calls me John, - My sweetheart calls me Buddy, and the boys call me Don, - But mother, oh dear mother, whenever I come near, - She calls me darling BABY and sometimes "BABY DEAR." - - I like the name of Johnnie, I'm proud of my name John, - I don't mind hearing Buddy and the shorter name of Don, - But though I love dear mother far more than all the rest, - Her name of DARLING BABY I thoroughly detest. - - You see when I am playing with boys in the street, - And pitching ball or doing some extraordinary feat, - It makes me feel so little to hear my mother call, - "Watch out my darling BABY, be careful lest you fall!" - - I'm not a darling baby, nor little baby dear, - I'm quite a great big boy and have no baby fear, - But I can't stand the guying the boys give to me, - When mother starts to calling that hateful name--"BABEE." - - - - - Koppa After Pi - - - I've very little Latin and very little Greek - Stored away in my small brain, which yet is very weak, - But one thing I'll remember, I think until I die, - And that is that the KOPPA follows after PI. - And mother says perhaps this solves the very reason why - The "Kops" they follow after cooks well trained in baking pie. - - - - - A Whingwang Sonnet Of An Easter Bonnet - - (Written for Cousin Marian Stoner.) - - [Illustration: Little girl without curl] - - - Once there was a little girl, - But she didn't have a curl, - Though she had an Easter-bonnet - With ostrich plumes and flowers on it, - Since like her mother she aspired - A la mode to be attired. - - But when she rose on Easter morn - With deepest grief her heart was torn, - For oh, alas! the rain was falling - In torrents great; to her appalling, - As well she knew 'twould spoil her bonnet - With ostrich plumes and flowers on it. - - Her hair in papers she had worn - The whole night through and tortures borne - In hopes to have a curl or two - To wear beneath her bonnet new. - But now, alas, the horrid rain - Would make her hair all straight again. - - And so with fear of straightened hair, - Which might cause folks to laugh and stare, - And likewise to protect her bonnet - With ostrich plumes and flowers on it, - She thought it best to stay away - From Sabbath school on Easter day. - - - - - The Giant Arithmos - - -This story was told to the author by her teacher, Mrs. A. R. Hornbrook, - of the Hornbrook Correspondence School of Mathematics, 5622 - Ellis Avenue, Chicago, Ill. - - - Great Jack-the-Giant-Killer brave, he killed all giants bad, - But one good giant's life was spared by this bold warrior lad. - ARITHMOS was this giant great, and all bright girls and boys - Should love the famous Giant-King far more than all their toys. - He's very old, and very great, and also wondrous wise, - For he can count all things on earth and even tell their size. - He knows how many birds there are; how high each bird can fly, - But never does he boast, or brag, or stoop to tell a lie. - He is so tall that he can reach up to the starry sky - And count the stars and meteors bright as swiftly they go by. - 'Tis he alone can tell you when a great eclipse will come - And darken the moon's lady or the old man in the sun. - He's always so good natured and obliging to us all; - He'll help us with our lessons hard when for his aid we call, - And tell us just the number of ripe apples on a plate, - How far away Chicago is, and if the train is late. - In fact he always answers us whene'er we ask "HOW MANY?" - And for his work and trouble never thinks to ask a penny. - All teachers and professors couldn't teach without his aid, - And men in every business know through him they will be paid. - We cannot sing in perfect time, nor even play a drum, - Divide an apple, buy a doll nor do the smallest sum, - And even BRIDGE by ladies fair cannot at all be played - Unless this mighty GIANT-KING will kindly lend his aid. - So as we cannot get along without "ARITHMOS LORE," - We all should learn his wondrous truths and love him more and more. - - - - - Good Weather Assured - - (Written for the Evansville Courier, February 3, 1909.) - - - When the second of February rolls around, - Out of his hole in the cold, dark ground - Comes Mr. Groundhog to look at the sky - And see if the season of summer is nigh; - So that he in the fields may merrily run - And eat farmers' crops 'neath the light o' the sun. - But if his own shadow he unfortunately sees, - In the greatest of terror he falls on his knees, - And quickly returns to his subterra home, - Resolving that he will not again roam - 'Till six stormy weeks have slowly gone by - And then once again, perhaps he will try - To put his flat head above the cold ground, - And take a survey of the earth all around. - So I made up my mind that during the year - I'd keep him at home so he couldn't appear. - And to bring wintry weather he hadn't a chance - For of his own shadow he caught not a glance. - - - - - Roosevelt Complimented By Mama Lion - - [Illustration] - - - One day last week King Teddy arose with old King Sun, - And seeing a huge lion, he seized his trusty gun - And made the King of Jungle-land quickly homeward run, - While Teddy followed after and thought it lots of fun. - King Lion reached his cavern home, trembling in great fear, - But when Queen Lion heard his tale, she simply scratched one ear, - Then shrugged her shoulders a la hump and to her husband said, - "In all the best newspapers, how often have I read, - That Teddy loves all parents who large families possess, - And I am sure with many cubs our happy den is blessed." - - Then brave and proud Queen Lion she carried out each babe, - And placed it in the doorway of her Afro-Jungle cave; - And there she proudly waited for King Teddy to appear, - For of his teeth and of his gun she hadn't any fear. - The coward King of Jungle Land, he bid himself inside, - And when he heard King Teddy's voice his bones shook in his hide; - But soon he knew his tears were vain when Teddy laughing said, - "As mother of fine sextets, you surely rank ahead - Of all the lions I have met in circus tent or den, - To meet you I'm DEE-LIGHTED, and I hope we'll meet again." - - - - - All Dentists Go To Heaven - - (Written for Dr. Richard Morris, Evansville, Ind.) - - - I don't like dentists, because they hurt me - With horrid bad pinchers as sharp as can be. - They pick at my teeth and scratch in my head - Until I begin to wish I were dead. - But I read in the paper (so I suppose it's so) - That all of the dentists to Heaven will go, - Because they are needed away up there - To make gold crowns for the angels fair. - - - - - The Time Of His Life - - (Written after seeing a cartoon by Mr. Karl Kae Knecht in the - Evansville Courier.) - - [Illustration: When He Met a School of Twelve Hippopotami] - - - There are many schools of learning and also schools of game, - But the school with largest members bears KING HIPPO'S name, - And big and little people, yes even EVANS' FLEET, - Would think it quite unpleasant a Hippo school to meet. - - But Bwana Tumbo Teddy, who knows no thought of fear, - Laughed in joyous pleasure as the SCHOOL drew near, - And smiling at the leader, he made her stiff with fright, - As from his parted mouthpiece his white teeth came in sight. - - Then Bwana seized his rifle and taking steady aim, - He fired at Queen Hippo and made her front legs lame, - Then shooting at her sisters, and brothers left and right, - He scattered all the mighty beasts and drove them out of sight. - - All those he killed, this hunter brave, then quickly towed ashore, - Saying, "I'M DE-LIGHTED, and I hope to meet some more - SCHOOLS OF HIPPOPOTAMI that feel inclined for strife, - As in this Hippo-battle I'd the time of my whole life." - - - - - King Teddy, The Fearless - - The names of tropical diseases mentioned in this rhyme were given - to the author by a young doctor who thought they could not be made - to rhyme. - - - King Teddy has much courage to fight both beasts and men - With pistols and with broadswords and with the mighty pen. - And now in Afric jungles he's busy fighting fleas, - Mosquitoes, and big tigers and monstrous bumble bees; - Huge elephants, gorillas, and awful Guinea-worms, - Sloughing phagedaena, and sleeping sickness germs, - Tinea imbricata, piedra and goundou, - Malaria and the ainhum, pinta and the sprue, - Chyluria, mycetoma, leprosy and yaws, - Afric dysentery and maybe lions' claws, - Bubonic plague and dengue and dreadful tropic-boils, - Fevers black and yellow and sometimes serpents' coils, - Tinea Madagascar, Dhobie itch, screw worms, - Beri-beri and craw-craw and all the Afric-germs; - With dread sun-traumatism, and abscess of the liver, - Yet none of these great terrors can make King Teddy shiver. - - - - - Good Bye To Teddy Bears - - - Good-bye to all the Teddy Bears, both big and small! - The "Billy Possums" are in style for one and all, - We little girls, like older folks, are bound to keep in style, - And so we have to change our toys most every little while. - - When Roosevelt or "Teddy," was ruler o'er this land, - All stylish girls and clever boys kept bears on hand - To play with and to walk with and to put to bed at night, - As "Teddy Bears" were symbols of the Rooseveltian light. - - But when King Teddy left his throne, Taft got his seat, - And soft brown teddies disappeared from home and street, - While "Billy Possums" came to rule for two years or for three, - When "BRYAN KITTENS" will be hatched and all the rage will be. - - - - - Cats A Kissin (Catechism) - - (Written for Cousin Patricia Rehn.) - - - Last week my cousin Patti, who isn't yet quite three, - Went to our good Sunday School with mother and with me. - She sat quite still and listened well to all the teacher said, - Until I thought she stowed away much knowledge in her head. - But when that evening Auntie asked, "What did my darling hear - When she went to Sunday school; tell me, won't you, dear?" - She shrugged her little shoulders and said, "Not anyfing - Except dey said some funny words and den began to sing; - Though 'bout de cats a kissin', well, the teacher said you should - Teach me ev'ry evenin' and den I'd be so dood." - - - - - Hens - - (Written for Aunt Mary Helena Rehn.) - - [Illustration: Cluck cluck no nails for me to cut.] - - - What curious birds are common hens! - They make good broth and even pens. - They have no teeth, no hair, no nose, - But sport a comb red as a rose. - They have no arms or funny bones - That causes folks to let forth groans, - Their victuals they all swallow whole - And use a craw for a chopping bowl. - They have no hands, they have no wrists, - And without hands they can't make fists, - But for one thing they should rejoice - And cluck aloud with cheerful voice; - Not having hands, they have no nails, - Which are the cause of many wails, - For once a week we girls and boys - Must put aside our games and toys - And all our nice exciting tales, - While mother trims our finger nails. - - - Plate 3: [Illustration: AUTHOR AT THREE YEARS OLD] - - - - - Please Grandpa, Croak - - [Illustration: Granddaddy - young Harry] - - - "Grandaddy," said young Harry, "do a good turn for me, - By croaking like a big bull frog so I can plainly see - If Daddy told the honest truth or only cracked a joke - Because he said I'd have some "dough" if you would only croak." - - - - - Wee Willie's First Hair Cut - - - Last Friday, for the first time, wee Willie went with me - To the colored barber, who bowed most graciously - And asked the little fellow how should he crop his curls, - Close to his head, in medium length, or bobbed like little girls? - Wee Willie answered promptly, "My hair, please, barber, crop - Like my own dear Daddy's, wif a small round hole on top." - - - - - Wise Replies - - (Written for Uncle Thomas Cresswell, London, Eng.) - - - "Joan of Arc, and who was she?" - Asked the teacher of little Leigh. - "Wife of Noah, of course," said she, - "Who sailed the ark upon the sea." - - "John's so wise he laughed at Leigh - When she tried to answer me, - So in the future for replies - We'll always go to John the wise. - Now what is lava, Johnnie, dear, - Can it be found in places near?" - - "Why, certainly," said smiling John, - "Most every day Dad puts it on, - And covers nearly his whole face - With lava thick in every place." - - - - - It Takes A Cigar A Long Time To Wear Out - - (Written for Mr. Harry Warren, Cincinnati, Ohio.) - - [Illustration] - - - When Harry Warren was a boy only five years old, - He wasn't then as he is now, so very big and bold, - But he was very much afraid of bad tobacco smoke, - Which seems to those who know him now to be a funny joke. - - He had an uncle on whose knee he loved to sit each day - And listen to exciting tales about the Pixies gay, - But when this uncle had a light upon a long cigar, - Then little Harry used to sit away from it as far - As he could manage well to get upon his uncle's knee, - Since Harry feared tobacco smoke more than a bumble bee. - - One day while sitting way far out upon his uncle's knee, - He grew so very tired as he waited there to see - The end of the long smoker which made smoke all about - And said, "It takes that big cigar a long time to wear out." - - - - - An Esperanto Poem Plain To All - - (Written for Prof Macloskie, Princeton University.) - - - Hundido krias--"Bow-wow-wow!" - Katido krias--"Meow-meow!" - Bovido krias--"Moo-moo-moo!" - Kolombo krias--"Coo-coo-coo!" - Shafido krias--"Baa-baa-baa!" - Infano krias--"Ma-ma-ma!" - - - - - Answers, Not Questions, Cause Trouble - - This story was told to the author by Mrs. Frederick Guthrie, of - Chicago, Ill. - - -MOTHER. - - "Don't bother your father with questions, Ervane, - He's tired of hearing you ask to explain - Why fishes can't walk or ride on the land? - How lizards and fleas can live in the sand? - What causes the sun to set in the west - And always to sleep in one golden nest? - When will the time come for children to fly - And play in the clouds with the birds in the sky? - Such foolish, vain questions, they trouble your dad - And sometimes I fear they make him quite sad." - - "No, mother," replied the inquisitive lad, - "It's the ANSWERS not QUESTIONS that trouble poor Dad." - - - - - The Pure Blooded Pup - - (Written for Mrs. Anna Chase Brainard, of Buffalo, N. Y.) - - - Once there was a little pup who lived in far off Kent, - Where he was born some years ago in kennels of Lord Dent; - His mother was of purest blood and likewise was his Pa, - So he arrived upon this earth without a single flaw. - - His tail was just the proper size and so was each small ear, - His shapely legs and nose and paws, they pleased his mother dear; - And with her soft and scarlet tongue she kissed her baby pup - And loved him, oh, so dearly, that she almost ate him up. - - The keeper of the kennels when he saw this terrier pup, - Declared, "It's just a beauty and will surely win "THE CUP" - For being a fox terrier of very purest breed - And now to my dear master I'll go with greatest speed - - And tell him of this puppy who will bring our kennels fame - And ask him what he thinks will be a truly proper name - For the most perfect terrier that ever came to Kent; - It seems to me he should be called for my great master "Dent." - - The master when he heard the news that a new pup had come, - Left off his game of playing cards and drinking pints of rum, - And hastened to the kennels to behold the wondrous pup, - Who at the coming dog show was to win the great prize cup. - - The mother dog she wagged her tail, with pride she was puffed up, - As her great master stood right near and smiled upon her pup, - While saying, "Higgens, listen well to what I have to say, - And care for this good mother dog and her fine pup each day. - - I'll name him for my ancestor, the great and famous Kent, - And in that name to the dog show next year he shall be sent, - Where I am sure he'll win the prize above all others there - For he is perfect in his shape and has fine silky hair." - - So little Kent was tended well and petted every day, - He never had to seek for bones and only had to play, - And having nothing else to do on mischief he was bent, - Was this aristocratic pup, owned by the great Lord Dent. - - And when a year had passed around, one day the master came - To take him to the London show, where he would win great fame; - But Kent was very naughty, as he did not wish to go - Away from his good kennel home to any prize dog show. - - At last his master whipped Pup Kent and oh, but he did swear - Because Kent snapped at Higgens, who was combing his fine hair - And putting on a collar with a chain of golden beads; - Such ornaments Kent could not see that any puppy needs. - - At last the royal pup was dressed in pupdom regal style, - And drove in a fine carriage, oh, for many a weary mile, - Until he came to London town, where nothing he could see, - Because all things were bidden with a fog as thick as could be. - - Before he'd even time to think, this 'ristocratic pup, - He found himself in a small cage with all the doors shut up, - And many men were standing round and gazing long at him, - While passing comments on his shape of head, and tail, and limb. - - Kent glared at them in silence and he would not wag his tail, - In fact just like a good young boy who might be put in jail - When he had never done a thing to break the country's law, - So felt this little terrier, this pup without a flaw. - - And when the judges thought that he should have the ribbon blue - Because of his most perfect blood shown by the records true, - He snapped and barked and even bit at those who came quite near - To tie the lovely ribbon on the neck of "PUPPY DEAR." - - So they decided that despite his wondrous pedigree - There yet was something in his blood that ought not there to be - And gave the prize, a silver cup, to a more common dog, - Who lay so still and quiet that he might have been a log. - - But when that evening our Lord Dent beheld with great surprise - That a less blooded terrier had won the noble prize, - He felt so very angry that he wished to beat Pup Kent, - And ordered that the beastly dog should quickly home be sent. - - But while poor Kent was going home so sad and in disgrace, - He got away from Higgens and he found another place - Far, far away from kennels of the great and wealthy Dent, - Near to a peaceful village, the runaway he went. - - Here he lay down so tired and thought of many a bone, - Which now was being gnawed each day by his good ma alone, - Since Dent, her darling puppy boy, was oh, so far away, - Oh, how he wished to gnaw a bone with his good ma this day! - - But as he lay a dreaming of lovely things to eat, - Quite suddenly a large gray rat ran right across his feet, - And after it there followed an Irishman named Pat, - Who sought to make a timely end of bad old Mister Rat. - - Big Pat was armed with a huge club and called to his old dog, - "Now, come along ye lazy baste, before he's in the bog!" - Then Kent he jumped and in one bound he seized poor Mister Rat, - Shook him about 'till he was dead and then brought him to Pat. - - Big Pat he gazed in wonder at the clever little dog, - And sitting down upon a large and green moss covered log, - Said, "Shure, ye bate this lazy hound that kennot catch a rat, - And if ye'll stay right here, me boy, I'll trate ye well," says Pat. - - Then proudly Kent he wagged his tail and tried so hard to smile - Upon the good old Irishman, who patted him awhile, - Then coaxed the stranger after him right through a broad green lane, - Which led to the fine country home of good Sir Michael Kane. - - And here Pat introduced the pup to all the family, - And they were all so very kind as any folks could be, - They patted his soft silky hair and praised him to the sky, - And gave him a big gravy dish all filled with nice meat pie, - And likewise a huge saucer, which was full of real sweet cream, - Which made the hungry doggie think that he was in a dream. - - So here Dog Kent decided was the best place for to dwell, - And here he still is living and is feeling very well. - He goes each morning to the barn and helps his good friend Pat - To catch the naughty rodents, who are called the name of RAT. - - The cook she feeds him daily, and he captures all the mice, - Which love to haunt the kitchen of the cleanly Bridget Bryce. - While little Mikey loves dear Kent far more than all his toys, - And says he'd rather play with him than any girls or boys, - Because he never minds a bit to jump right in the pond - And bring to land a stick or stone or weeping willow wand. - - He always acts politely to all who may come near, - And so all strangers pet him and think he is a dear. - They like his soft and silky hair, which proves he has good blood, - And never does he make folks mad by tracking floors with mud. - - He's wiser than most common dogs, whose hair is rough and coarse, - His bark is always pleasant, and 'tis never loud nor hoarse; - He's swifter also than slow dogs who cannot catch a rat, - Because they always eat too much and get so very fat. - - - MORAL. - - - This story proves that good, pure blood is a fine thing to own, - But it can't help the puppies or the children all alone, - Unless these youthful puppies and the children, very small, - Learn to keep quite busy and to have a smile for all. - - - - - Too ticklish to Count His Ribs - - (Written for Richard Montgomery, Erie, Pa.) - - [Illustration: Psychology teacher asked Dickie Gray.] - - - In the class of physiology the teacher asked one day, - How many ribs have you, my boy, tell me, Dickie Gray? - And wiggling, giggling Dickie very promptly made reply, - "Dear teacher, I must tell the truth, for I could never lie, - But as for ribs I cannot say how many I possess, - For I'm too awful ticklish to count them, I confess." - - - - - The Young Mail Carrier - - (Written for Mr. and Mrs. W. F. Wocher, Indianapolis, Ind.) - - [Illustration: Billy and his Mother] - - - Young Billy from his lovely home disappeared one day, - And when his mother missed her lad she thought he'd run away, - But soon the sprightly little chap came quickly running back, - Bearing on his shoulders small, a large round leather sack, - And said, "Dear mother, I have been a very good, kind boy, - Trying like the Bible says, to bring our neighbors joy. - I played I was a postman and I paid each one a call, - And to the people in this block, I gave them letters, all." - - MOTHER: "But where, my precious little lad, my darling, honey pet, - Where in the name of goodness these letters did you get?" - - BILLY: "I found them with no trouble; they were the ones that you - Kept in your top bureau drawer, all tied with ribbons blue." - - - - - On Thanksgiving - - - Before you eat good turkey, rich mince and pumpkin pies - On that great feast or feast days when "tum-tums" grow in size, - The good old day THANKSGIVING, the best day in the year, - When all should be so thankful around the board of cheer, - Then don't forget the poor ones, the hungry, cold and sad, - Go fill their empty tables and make the whole world glad. - - - - - Living Valentines Presented By Cupid - -Written February, 1909, for an entertainment at St. Paul's Episcopal - Sunday School, Evansville, Ind. - - - CUPID: "I'm glad to see you all to-night, - And it will give my heart delight - Some lovely valentines to show - And make you wish you had a beau." (SHOWS BOW.) - - FIRST PICTURE--A SUNBONNET BABY. - CUPID: "Here's a little baby fair, - But you can't see her face or hair." - - BABY: "I'm some one who loves you (POINTING AT AUDIENCE). - Can't you guess who?" - - SECOND PICTURE--BOY WEARING A LARGE HAT AND WITH - BACK TURNED TO THE AUDIENCE. - CUPID: "Here's another, called 'GUESS WHO,' - Come to say, 'How do you do.'" - - BOY: "I'm for my own dear valentine. - Guess me and I'll be thine." - - THIRD PICTURE--HEART'S DELIGHT. - CUPID: "This is Heart's Delight, - Look at her face, so beaming bright." - - HEART'S DELIGHT: "If you love me, oh, my dear, - This is how I will appear." (SMILES AND SINGS A SONG.) - - FOURTH PICTURE--HEART'S SORROW. - CUPID: "Watch this poor aching heart of sorrow, - He'll cry all day and perhaps to-morrow. - - HEART'S SORROW: "If you do not love me, dear, - This is how I will appear." - - FIFTH PICTURE--TWO JAPS. - CUPID: "Allow me the pleasure to show to thee - A very sweet picture from over the sea." - - THE JAPS HOLD FANS IN FRONT OF FACES AND SING: - "Jap a ling a ling, Jap aling a lee, - You're my Jappie baby, - If you lovee me as I lovee you - No knife can cut our love in two." - - CUPID: "I'll tell you what they said, - I'm sure they mean to wed. - Cho, cho, cho, cho, nano hagi tomare - Nano haga eyay nawraw teni tomare. - Dai dai mushi, dai dai mushi - Tsuno chitto dashare - Ame kaze foku kara tsuno chitto dashare." - - SIXTH PICTURE--FRENCH VALENTINE. - CUPID: "Now I'll show you a lady from far away France - Who says, 'Parlez-vous' and knows how to dance." - - FRENCH VALENTINE: "Je vous aime, je vous adore - Que voulez-vous de plus encore?" - FRENCH VALENTINE DANCES. - - SEVENTH PICTURE--GERMAN VALENTINE. - CUPID: "This is a lady who wants a beau, - In her own language she'll tell you so." - - GERMAN VALENTINE: "Ich liebe dich, lieben sie mich?" - - EIGHTH PICTURE--COMIC VALENTINE. - CUPID: "This a comic, to make you smile, - And keep you good humored a little while." - - COMIC, HOLDING A LARGE GRAVY SPOON IN ONE HAND, YELLOW - MOON IN OTHER. - "Of all earthly joys, I love best to spoon - With thee, oh, my darling, 'neath the light o' the moon." - - NINTH PICTURE--ANOTHER COMIC. - CUPID: "Another comic will now appear, - I hope that you his plea will hear." - - BOY DRESSED IN RIDICULOUS COSTUME, KNEELING AND - HOLDING A CARDBOARD HEART: - BOY: "My heart is thine, my soul is thine, - Won't you be my valentine?" - - TENTH PICTURE--THE OLD-FASHIONED VALENTINE. - CUPID: "The pleasure now, dear friends, is mine, - To show you one more valentine. - This is my dear sweet valentine, - Sent to us from 'Ye olden time.'" - - GIRL DRESSED IN OLD-FASHIONED COSTUME: - "I am an old-fashioned dame, - But I love you just the same." - - CUPID: "And I am an Esperanto valentine, - For me dear friends, you all should pine. - Karulin' mi amas vin, - Chu vi amas, amas min? - Kaj nun mi deziras vin - Estu mia valentin'!" - - - Plate 4: [Illustration: AUTHOR AT FOUR YEARS OLD] - - [Illustration: decorative mark] - - - - - Universal Peace - - (Written for Mr. Charles Randall, Seattle, Washington, (Mia Onklo - Karlo.) - - [Illustration: +No EATA You--No. Me Know+ ESPERANTO+ - - +Knecht+] - - - Not long ago, Sir Wu Ting Fang, - A song of peace most sweetly sang, - Suggesting that the Pension Millions, - Given yearly will be billions - Unless all wars be made to cease - By a Tribunal ruled by "PEACE." - - But good Sir Fang he did not go - Far off to Hague or else he'd know - That Peace Tribunals bring not "PEACE," - Nor cause all bloody wars to cease; - As every man from each strange land - All other men can't understand - E'en when the learned GO-BETWEEN - Tries to explain and makes a scene. - - Of mighty sword and mightier pen - Poets have sung time and again, - But they forgot in songs they sung - To praise the power of a COMMON TONGUE, - And ne'er will banners of PEACE be unfurled - 'Till ESPERANTO rules over the world. - - - - - All The World Cries - - (Written for Katherine Wellman, Evansville, Ind.) - - [Illustration: CRYING ANIMALS AND PETS] - - - "Quack-quack-quack-quack!" cries Auntie Duck, - While Mother Hen goes "Cluck-cluck-cluck!" - And Papa Dog cries, "Bowwow-wow," - And Sister Cat, "Me-ow, me-ow!" - - "Eek-eek- eek- eek!" squeals Grandma Pig, - I'm growing, oh, so fat and big;" - While "Cackle-cackle" all the day, - The little goslings like to say. - - Proud Grandpa Turkey struts along - With his eternal gobble-song: - Sir Horse he whinnies, "Hee-hee-hee!" - And "buzzey-buzzey" goes Miss Bee. - Sis Maud, the Mule, cries "Hee-hee-haw!" - And Missy Crow goes "Caw-caw-caw!" - Good Madam Cow cries, "Moo-moo-moo!" - And gentle Doves they "Coo-coo-coo!" - The Baby Lambs cry, "Baa-baa-baa!" - And little Kids squeal, "Ma-ma-ma!" - - - - - Could Only Ask Questions - - (Written for Miss Edna Speck, Evansville, Ind.) - - - "Madelaine," asked her mother, when home she came at noon, - "How did you like your teacher, or can't you tell so soon?" - MADELAINE. - "Oh, yes, I formed my 'pinion long 'fore I started home, - She's rather pleasant, looks quite wise, and wears a lovely comb, - But surely she is stupid in spite of her wise looks, - 'Cause she only asked us questions from out a lot of books. - - - - - Let The Bumble Be - - (Written for Cousin Virginia Rehn.) - - [Illustration: STUNG...+Knecht+] - - - One day I saw a bumble bee bumbling on a rose, - And as I stood admiring him he stung me on the nose. - My nose in pain, it swelled so large it looked like a potato, - So Daddy said, though Mother thought 'twas more like a tomato. - And now dear children this advice I hope you'll take from me, - And when you see a bumble bee just let that bumble be. - - - - - Take That Gum From Your Mouth And Put Your Feet In - - (Written for Cousin Pauline Sackville.) - - [Illustration] - - - Young Susie was quite noted for having great large feet, - And for working both her jaws, this maid could not be beat. - Her wad of gum she always bore with her unto the school, - Though well she knew she might be spanked, for 'twas against the rule, - But skillfully she hid this gum, did naughty little Sue, - Though oft' behind her little book she took a little chew, - But once when she was building up a castle in the air, - And thought she was a lady rich and most entrancing fair, - While stretching out her legs and feet into the narrow aisle - And thinking of sweet Bobby Jones, the maid began to smile. - Then suddenly the teacher cried, above the school room's din, - "Take that gum from out your mouth and put your feet right in." - - - - - The Tersest Bathing Suit - - This story was told to the author by Mr. Marshall White, - Evansville, Ind. - - - When to the seashore Robert went, with Ma and Sister Nell, - He met a wise professor, who soon taught him to spell, - Likewise to read of fairy lore and use a real steel pen - To write to his own father dear, who like most all the men - Must ever stay at home and work to earn the cents to pay - For wife and children's outing 'till the summer slips away. - - Now all the strange, uncommon words which little Bob could find, - He stored away and tried to keep in his small, active mind - So as to use in writing notes to his dear fat old Dad, - And when the big folks used strange words it made him very glad. - So one day when of something TERSE he heard his sister tell, - He asked her for its meaning and he thus rewarded Nell - By writing to his father, dear, "Oh, Daddy, you should see - Nell's awful TERSEST bathing suit, which won't reach to her knee." - - - - - Furs Lined With Kittens - - (Written for Adaline Sherman, Wheeling. W. Va.) - - [Illustration] - - - Said a rich little girl, who was boasting one day, - "I'ze too many furs, so I throws dem away," - But her poor little friend, who fine furs had none, - In braggadocia could not be outdone, - And proudly she showed her little fur mittens - And said, "I'ze sum odders, do deys lined wid kittens." - - - - - A Boy's Description Of A Goat - - (Written for Cousin James Diller.) - - - When the teacher asked young Leo to write a little rhyme - Describing some strange animal he'd seen at any time, - He seized his long slate pencil and this is what he wrote - About the common animal, which children call a goat: - A goat is stronger than a pig, - But often it is not as big. - It has four legs just like a horse, - But never runs on a race-course. - It gives good milk, though not as much - As cows and elephants and such, - But more than any bull or ox, - Rooster, ram, or sly old fox. - Like any mule a goat likes hay - And all tin cans we throw away. - He's useful and I'm fond of him, - But some good folks have a strange whim - To hold their noses when he's near, - And act as if they greatly fear - To touch his fur which has the smell - Of something I know very well. - The odor I'd know anywhere, - It's like Dad's tonic for his hair. - - - - - A Riddle - - (Written for Miss Mame Leo, Erie, Pa.) - - [Illustration] - - - One night 'neath the light of a silvery moon - There sat on a log pile a very fat coon - And also a little most cunning brown fellow - Eating of melon so juicy and mellow. - The large robust coon and the wee little one - Thought they were having a bushel of fun, - And laughed very loudly in notes of pure glee, - For they were as happy as happy could be. - - So here is a riddle I'll give now to you, - Guess the relations there was 'twixt the two. - -ANSWER. - - Most everyone answers, "Why, father and son." - Not so--'twas a Mammy and her little one. - - - - - Grandpa's Head Cums Frew His Hair - - (Written for Margaret Ruston, Evansville, Ind., and Mr. Wm. Warren - Newburg, Ind.) - - - When Margaret was a youngster scarcely two years old, - At climbing chairs and tables this lass was very bold, - And one day when her grandpa was seated in his chair - She climbed upon the rounded rungs as if they were a stair, - And looking at her Grandpa's head, which fast was growing bald, - She cried out, "Dearest Grandpa, one time you must hab failed," - Or maybe you've been naughty and dot an awful scare, - Which taused de top ob yu's round head to tum right frew de hair. - - - - - Susan Rewarded For Twenty Year's Service - - (Written for Dr. and Mrs. W. Baker, Terre Haute, Ind.) - - [Illustration] - - - Professor Theophilus Socrates Snook, - One day paid a visit to Susan, his cook, - And beaming upon her with kindliest look - Said, "Susan, my dear, please gaze at tins book. - In here you may learn of elephantiasis, - And also the hookworm, uncinariasis; - Of craw-craw and chiggers, of ainhum and sprue, - And all that I've written about them is true. - Now, Susan, to me you've been faithful, my dear, - In keeping my house for many a year; - For years nearly twenty you've been now with me, - Cooking my victuals just as they should be, - And truly I think a reward I should pay - To one who has labored from day unto day. - So when I discovered a wondrous new germ, - Which causes young children to wiggle and squirm, - I thought that this bug for you I would name - And bring you great glory and honor and fame. - It's a wondrous discovery, this ungomariasis, - And so we will call it the SUSANBONPIASIS." - - "No, thank you, your honor," said Susan Bawben, - "I had the bugs once and don't want 'em again, - And if you onsist upon callin' me BUGS, - I'll lave you alone wid your books and your drugs." - - - Plate 5: [Illustration: AUTHOR AT FIVE YEARS OLD] - - - - - Bridget Makes Split Pea Soup - - (Written for Lieutenant and Mrs. Arthur Crenshaw, U. S. N.) - - [Illustration: K.K.] - - - "Bridget," asked the mistress, "whatever is the matter, - Nothing ready for our Lunch excepting pancake batter? - Why, I invited guests to come for lunch at half past one - And they've been waiting all this time and yet there's nothing done." - - "Well, mum," replied Miss Bridget, "the fault is all your own, - For split pea soup you ordered and workin' here alone, - It's took me most two hours while tryin' just to split - Three hundred of these blarsted peas, which give me most a fit, - And as there's still three hundred, 'twill take two hours more - To split the pesky little things, shure as me name's MAHORE!" - - - - - Lazy White Men Sit While Flying Through The Air - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - Poor Lo, the Indian, disrespects his brothers wise and fair, - Who now on aeroplanes are wont to make trips through the air. - He watches them go circling like birds up in the skies, - Then grunts, "Heap lazy white man, he sits down when he flies." - - - - - To Save Him From A Whipping - - (Written for Howard Roosa, Evansville, Ind.) - - [Illustration: K.] - - - When Mrs. Hall, who had spent the day - With Mrs. Greene, was going away, - Wee curly headed naughty Joe - Begged so hard that she wouldn't go. - - Now all the day this roguish lad - Had disobeyed and been quite bad, - So Mrs. Hall, in great surprise, - Paused and looked in his brown eyes, - While saying, "I'm so glad to know - You love me truly, dearest Joe." - - "Oh, 'tisent that," said honest Joe, - "I wouldn't mind for you to go - Except my mother said to-day, - She'd whip me when you went away." - - - - - A Skillet In Society (Alias A Chafing Dish) - - (Written for Mrs. Katherine Brown, Indianapolis, Ind.) - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - I heard my mother, just to-day, asking dear old dad, - To buy her a nice chafing-dish and make her very glad; - Though he declared its cooking was a waste of alcohol, - Causing indigestion and perhaps a doctor's call. - I inner saw a chafing-dish and so I longed to know - How it looked and what 'twas for and so and so and so; - But mother would not answer and daddy went away, - So I sought the kitchen, where Bridget holds her sway, - And asked her if she ever saw, since she began to cook, - A chafing-dish on pantry shelf or pictured in a book? - Then Bridget turned her pug nose up with a "contempshus" air, - And gave a twist to her small knot of brick dust colored hair, - And said, "A chafing-dish, my dear, so says Miss B. Moriety, - Is but a common skillet pan that's got in High Society." - - - - - Autos Change Good Luck - - (Written for Uncle Cicero Stoner.) - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - Poor Uncle Zeke, he's very sad, and says the whole world's wrong, - For when he was a little boy it was a common song, - To sing about the luck which came from finding a horse shoe, - And in those good old lucky days the sign was always true. - - But Sunday when poor Uncle Zeke was walking on the street, - He saw a lucky horseshoe which was lying at his feet, - And as he stooped to seize the prize which lay before him there, - Along an automobile came and whizzed him in the air. - - To-day I saw him lying still and pale upon his couch, - And oh, my goodness gracious, but he had an awful grouch! - His hands and arms in bandages were tied securely up, - And on his forehead was a bump like Aunt Mariah's cup. - - He told me I should listen well and take his counsel sage, - And never try to get good luck in this fierce auto age, - By picking up a horse's shoe in street or country road - No more than I would stoop to seize a common green back toad. - - - - - A Boy Who Was Hero And villian - - (Written for Uncle Ernest, Sackville.) - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - One day in a big meeting held by a MERCY-BAND, - The leader asked each little boy to hold up his right hand - If he could tell of any deed of kindness he had done - In saving some poor animal or helping any one. - Then Ernest held his hand on high and pride suffused his face, - As from his seat he quickly rose and took the speaker's place, - While speaking loud in accents clear, "I saved a little pup - Who had his tail in a tin can all tied securely up. - I took the can from off his tail and made him bark with joy, - So mother said and so said dad--I was a darling boy." - - "And so say I," the leader said, while calling him her "DEAR," - "But how I wish the wicked boy who did the deed was here." - ERNEST. - "Well, here he is, for I'm the boy who did that deed as well, - So I could take the tin can off and of my goodness tell." - - - - - Wise Ignatius Escapes A Whipping - - (Written for Edgar and Melville Garvin, Evansville, Ind.) - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - "Father," said learned Ignatius, as the strap was preparing to fall - Down on his trouserless bare-skin, "I don't mind a whipping at all, - But are you quite certain, dear father, the strap has been well - sterilized - For virulent germs in old leather are often concealed and disguised; - And surely by violent impact with textile and soft porous skin, - But lately exposed to the street's dust there's danger of entering in - Upon my most delicate system, and then comes the big doctor's fee, - So dear father show you're a wise man and touch not that strap upon - me." - - While the learned youth plead, lo! his father upon that dread strap - loosed his hold, - And thus he escaped from a whipping, Ignatius, the wise and the bold. - - - - - Nervous Jelly - - (Written for Charles Donnelly, Evansville, Ind.) - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - One day when there was company, wee greedy Lillie May, - Took the jelly nearly all when it was passed her way; - And in great haste she ate it up with her small silver spoon, - But oh, alas, the Piggiewig! she was discovered soon - By mother, who was greatly shocked to see her naughty elf - Eating like a greedy boy from off the kitchen shelf. - But mother couldn't scold aloud for fear the guest would hear, - And so she softly whispered, "Don't eat that way, my dear." - Then Mrs. Dean, the company, she patted Lillie's head, - And smiling at the jellied face, she to the culprit said, - "I've always liked the jelly good which makes my bread so sweet, - And surely it tastes better still when with a spoon we eat - This lovely, wobbling dainty, which is loved by one and all, - From little girls and tiny boys to great men, large and tall." - This speech encouraged Lillie May, who nodded her wise head - And said, "Besides dis jelly is too nervous for to spread." - - - - - One Johnson More, One Smith Less - - (Written for Salibelle Royster, Smith's Mills, Kentucky.) - - [Illustration] - - - When Zekiel Rastus Johnson had the courage to propose - To lovely Miss Amanda Smith, she turned up her flat nose - And said, "Now Rastus Johnson, how dare you ask of me" - To change my 'ristocratic name and Mrs. Johnson be, - When now in the directory, the Johnsons are ahead - Of our most noted family, so 'course I would not wed - With you to make one Johnson more to swell the Johnson line, - While Smiths in number take back seats where they can never shine. - - - Plate 6: [Illustration: AUTHOR AT SIX YEARS OLD] - - - - - Pride - - (Written for St. Nicholas, June, 1909.) - - [Illustration: KNECHT] - - - The Bible says that pride's the cause of people falling down, - And an example of this truth I once saw in our town, - When we were driving on the street and watching passers-by, - From out a store stepped a fine dude, all dressed in silk hat high, - And pants so tight he could not take a single manly stride, - His moustache curled and round his neck a ribbon pink and wide, - While in his hand a gold head cane, which he twirled round and round, - So that the people all would know a great man was in town; - But being filled with pride of self he did not know his heel - Had come in contact with a part of a banana peel - Until it felled him to the earth and smashed his silk hat's crown - And even then he did not know 'twas PRIDE that knocked him down. - - - - - Job Smarter Than Modern Babies - - [Illustration: K] - - - "Mother," said Lida, "why can't brother speak, - Is he so stupid or only just weak, - Like poor ancient Grandma, when she has a cold, - And loses her voice so she can't even scold?" - - "No, darling," said mother, "your brother can't talk, - Eat sugar candy, nor even yet walk, - As he is a baby the size of your doll, - And babies can't talk when they are so small." - - "Then, mother," said Lida, "the kids nowadays - Are not half so smart in all of their ways - As babies who lived in the long, long ago, - For dear teacher told me (so 'course it is so,) - That Job in the Bible cursed the day he was born, - I 'spose like big Tom, when he can't play his horn." - - - - - Only Naughty Children See "Spooks" On Hallow'een - - (Written for Aunt Winifred Broad, - Stockleigh Pomeroy, England.) - - [Illustration: decorative border KNECHT] - - - Witches and goblins, spooks and elves, - With sprites and gnomes from elf-land delves, - To-night are flying here and there, - Yes, up and down and everywhere. - For this one night in all the year, - They rule the earth and bring great fear - To all the naughty little boys - Who tease good girls and break their toys. - - These spooks they also make girls sad - When they are selfish, cross and bad; - So when it's dark, bad boys and maids - They see these awful fearsome shades, - And that is why with covered heads, - They trembling lie in their warm beds. - - But even there, they goblins see, - Spooks, and gnomes and all that be - Abroad upon weird Hallow'een, - When all the wizards may be seen - By naughty kids and grown up folks, - Who like to play most wicked jokes. - - But good young girls and gentle boys, - The kids who are their mothers' joys, - They like the dark just as the light, - For spooks ne'er come within their sight, - And in their dreams the lovely elves - Show them bright scenes from fairy delves. - - So, if to-night you are afraid - Of any spook or any shade, - We'll know you are a naughty child, - So cross and willful, rude and wild. - - - - - Six Year Old Girl Writes Poem Hoping To Save Forest Trees - - (From "The Woman's National Daily.") - - -The following rhyme was written by a little 6-year-old-girl in hopes -to save a beautiful forest near Evansville, Ind., and to help the -Children's Outing Farm. A short account of the little girl's work -as an Esperantist appeared in a recent issue of The National Daily -and a number of articles concerning her abilities as a linguist have -appeared in other publications. - -She is the youngest child in the world holding a diploma from Dr. -Zamenhof for being able to read, write and speak in Esperanto, and -she also speaks French as well as English. - -This little girl, who was born in Norfolk, Va., has been a lover of -books since her babyhood days. She knew Mother Goose by heart when -but 1 year of age and learned to read when but 2. At 4 she read -Lamb's Tales of Shakespeare and had finished the fifth reader. A few -months ago she was sent to school, but could not be graded, as she -could read, write and spell anything, but knew nothing of arithmetic. -The noted mathematician, Mrs. Hornbrook, of Chicago, having met the -little girl at Chautauqua, N. Y., and knowing of her mental powers, -asked to instruct her in this branch, and she soon taught her the -rudiments of arithmetic. - -She is the daughter of Dr. J. B. Stoner, Surgeon in the Public Health -and Marine Hospital Service, and Winifred Sackville Stoner, President -of the Woman's Esperanto League. - - - - - An Appeal To The Fairies - - - Good Fairies, save the lovely trees which live on Coal Mine Hill! - Their home has been your home so long, your hearts with grief would - fill - Should stout men armed with axes come and fell them to the earth, - These monarchs of the forest, these jewels of great worth. - The giant oaks and stately elms, the rulers of this wood, - Have watched the growth of Evansville and helped it as they could. - They gave their shade and soft bright leaves to make a downy nest - To shelter the first baby boy that Evansville possessed. - Before this city had a church in which both bad and good - Could ask forgiveness of the Lord, they worshipped in this wood; - And those who love the beautiful and lovely scenes to see, - They climb upon this grassy hill and stand beneath some tree, - While gazing far as eye can reach to fair Kentucky's lands, - Or looking at the river shore on which our city stands. - Above their heads the bright blue sky, green grass beneath their feet, - And all around a lovely scene such as we seldom meet; - Green pastures with cows grazing, broad river flowing by, - And many tall church spires lifted toward the sky. - No fitter place for children nor grown-up folks could be - Than on this lovely Coal Mine Hill where Nature we may see. - 'Tis here the little orphans and poor children all around - Find the greatest pleasures which in this woods abound. - So, dearest, kindest Fairies, please rescue these grand trees, - And save them for the children--we ask you on our knees. - - THE END - -*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JINGLES *** - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the -United States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online -at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you -are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the -country where you are located before using this eBook. -</div> - -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Jingles</p> -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Winifred Sackville Stoner, Jr.</p> -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Illustrator: Karl Kae Knecht</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: May 17, 2022 [eBook #68113]</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</p> - <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em; text-align:left'>Produced by: Charlene Taylor, Jwala Kumar Sista and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.)</p> -<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JINGLES ***</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp48" id="cover" style="max-width: 40.625em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/cover.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_1">[1]</span></p> - -<div class="tnotes"> -<p class="center xlarge"><a id="Transcriber-Note"></a><span class="u">Transcriber's Notes</span></p> -<p>1. Table of Contents with title-wise navigation-links, added by the transcriber.</p> -<p>2. Typographical errors and hyphenation inconsistencies were silently corrected.</p> -<p>3. Some illustrations appearing before chapter heading in the original, -are placed next to heading of relevant chapter.</p> -<p>4.The cover image was created from the title page by the transcriber and is placed in the public domain.</p> -</div> -<p class="center bold xlarge space-below">Table of Contents.</p> - -<table summary="contents"> -<tbody> - -<tr><td class="tdl">Chapter</td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr">Page</td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Christmas_Wish_For_All_My_Friends">A Christmas Wish For All My Friends</a> -</td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_6"> 6</a></td></tr> - -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#PREFACE">PREFACE</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_7"> 7</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#plate_1"><i>AUTHOR AT ONE YEAR OLD</i></a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#plate_1"><i>Plate 1</i></a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Pets_Christmas_Carol">The Pet's Christmas Carol</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_9"> 9</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Great_Surprise">A Great Surprise</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_9"> 9</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Santas_Reindeer_In_The_Sky">Santa's Reindeer In The Sky</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_10">10</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Nissen_The_Santa_Claus_of_Norway">Nissen, The Santa Claus of Norway</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_13">13</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#After_The_Fourth_Was_Over">After The Fourth Was Over</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_14">14</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Kitten_Gone_To_Waste">A Kitten Gone To Waste</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_15">15</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_New_Baby">The New Baby</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_15">15</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Woes_Caused_By_Whooping_Bugs">Woes Caused By Whooping Bugs</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_16">16</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#How_Simple_Simon_Became_Wise">How Simple Simon Became Wise</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_16">16</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#plate_2"><i>AUTHOR AT TWO YEARS OLD</i></a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#plate_2"><i>Plate 2</i></a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Too_Many_Dolls">Too Many Dolls</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_17">17</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Cat_Extincted_The_Canary">The Cat Extincted The Canary</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_17">17</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Boys_Complaint">A Boy's Complaint</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_18">18</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Koppa_After_Pi">Koppa After Pi</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_18">18</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Whingwang_Sonnet_Of_An_Easter_Bonnet">A Whingwang Sonnet Of An Easter Bonnet</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_19">19</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Giant_Arithmos">The Giant Arithmos</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_20">20</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Good_Weather_Assured">Good Weather Assured</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_20">20</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Roosevelt_Complimented_By_Mama_Lion">Roosevelt Complimented By Mama Lion</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_21">21</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#All_Dentists_Go_To_Heaven">All Dentists Go To Heaven</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_21">21</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Time_Of_His_Life">The Time Of His Life</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_22">22</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#King_Teddy_The_Fearless">King Teddy, The Fearless</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_23">23</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Good_Bye_To_Teddy_Bears">Good Bye To Teddy Bears</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_23">23</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Cats_A_Kissin_Catechism">Cats A Kissin (Catechism)</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_23">23</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Hens">Hens</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_24">24</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#plate_3"><i>AUTHOR AT THREE YEAR OLD</i></a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#plate_3"><i>Plate 3</i></a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Please_Grandpa_Croak">Please Grandpa, Croak</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_25">25</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Wee_Willies_First_Hair_Cut">Wee Willie's First Hair Cut</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_25">25</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Wise_Replies">Wise Replies</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_25">25</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#It_Takes_A_Cigar_A_Long_Time_To_Wear_Out">It Takes A Cigar A Long Time To Wear Out</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_26">26</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#An_Esperanto_Poem_Plain_To_All">An Esperanto Poem Plain To All</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_26">26</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Answers_Not_Questions_Cause_Trouble">Answers, Not Questions, Cause Trouble</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_27">27</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Pure_Blooded_Pup">The Pure Blooded Pup</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_28">28</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Too_ticklish_to_Count_His_Ribs">Too ticklish to Count His Ribs</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_30">30</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Young_Mail_Carrier">The Young Mail Carrier</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_31">31</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#On_Thanksgiving">On Thanksgiving</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_31">31</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Living_Valentines_Presented_By_Cupid">Living Valentines Presented By Cupid</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_32">32</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#plate_4"><i>AUTHOR AT FOUR YEARS OLD</i></a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#plate_4"><i>Plate 4</i></a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Universal_Peace">Universal Peace</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_34">34</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#All_The_World_Cries">All The World Cries</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_35">35</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Could_Only_Ask_Questions">Could Only Ask Questions</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_35">35</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Let_The_Bumble_Be">Let The Bumble Be</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_36">36</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Take_That_Gum_From_Your_Mouth_And_Put_Your_Feet_In">Take That Gum From Your Mouth And Put Your Feet In</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_37">37</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#The_Tersest_Bathing_Suit">The Tersest Bathing Suit</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_37">37</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Furs_Lined_With_Kittens">Furs Lined With Kittens</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_38">38</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Boys_Description_Of_A_Goat">A Boy's Description Of A Goat</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_38">38</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Riddle">A Riddle</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_39">39</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Grandpas_Head_Cums_Frew_His_Hair">Grandpa's Head Cums Frew His Hair</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_39">39</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Susan_Rewarded_For_Twenty_Years_Service">Susan Rewarded For Twenty Year's Service</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_40">40</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#plate_5"><i>AUTHOR AT FIVE YEARS OLD</i></a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#plate_5"><i>Plate 5</i></a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Bridget_Makes_Split_Pea_Soup">Bridget Makes Split Pea Soup</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_41">41</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Lazy_White_Men_Sit_While_Flying_Through_The_Air">Lazy White Men Sit While Flying Through The Air</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_41">41</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#To_Save_Him_From_A_Whipping">To Save Him From A Whipping</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_42">42</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Skillet_In_Society_Alias_A_Chafing_Dish">A Skillet In Society (Alias A Chafing Dish)</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_43">43</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Autos_Change_Good_Luck">Autos Change Good Luck</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_44">44</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#A_Boy_Who_Was_Hero_And_villian">A Boy Who Was Hero And villian</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_45">45</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Wise_Ignatius_Escapes_A_Whipping">Wise Ignatius Escapes A Whipping</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_46">46</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Nervous_Jelly">Nervous Jelly</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_47">47</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#One_Johnson_More_One_Smith_Less">One Johnson More, One Smith Less</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_48">48</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#plate_6"><i>AUTHOR AT SIX YEARS OLD</i></a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#plate_6"><i>Plate 6</i></a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Pride">Pride</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_49">49</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Job_Smarter_Than_Modern_Babies">Job Smarter Than Modern Babies</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_50">50</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Only_Naughty_Children_See_Spooks">Only Naughty Children See "Spooks" On Hallow'een</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_51">51</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#Six_Year_Old_Girl_Writes_Poem_Hoping_To_Save_Forest_Trees">Six Year Old Girl Writes Poem Hoping To Save Forest Trees</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_52">52</a></td></tr> -<tr><td class="tdl"><a href="#An_Appeal_To_The_Fairies">An Appeal To The Fairies</a></td><td class="tdc"></td><td class="tdr"><a href="#Page_52">52</a></td></tr> - -</tbody> -</table> - - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_2">[2]</span></p> -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="gap5t"></p> -<h1>JINGLES</h1> -<p class="gap5b"></p> -</div> -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_3">[3]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="gap5t"></p> -<div class="bbox center"> -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="tpimage.jpg" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/tpimage.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="medium center">WRITTEN FOR DEAR FRIENDS</p> -<p class="small center">BY</p> -<p class="large center">WINIFRED SACKVILLE STONER, Jr.</p> -<p class="small center">(When five and six years of age)</p> -<p class="small center">ILLUSTRATED BY</p> -<p class="medium center">BY</p> -<p class="large center">KARL KAE KNECHT</p> -<p class="space-above"></p> -<p class="split-para medium left">Copyright 1909<span class="two medium right">Smith & Butterfield, <br />Publishers</span></p> -<p class="split-para medium left">Winifred Sackville Stoner, Jr.<span class="two medium right">Evansville, Ind.</span></p> -<p class="space-above"></p> -</div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_4">[4]</span></p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image004" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image004.png" alt="" /> -</div> - -<p class="caption center">[<i>Best Wishes to my little friend, Miss Winifred S. Stoner Jr., -whose delightful Jingles I like to illustrate--K. K. Knecht</i>]</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_5">[5]</span></p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp62" id="image005" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image005.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<p class="caption cb large">THE AUTHOR</p> -<p>The author of these little rhymes, which have been previously published -in "The Evansville Courier" and several other publications, was -born in Norfolk, Virginia, August 19, 1902. From her babyhood days -she has been a great lover of poetry and began composing original rhymes -when but three years of age.</p> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_6">[6]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter bbox"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Christmas_Wish_For_All_My_Friends">A Christmas Wish<br />For All My Friends</h2> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -While Christmas bells are chiming, oh, may there come to you</div><div class="verse"> -A dear sweet little fairy, who's always good and true;</div><div class="verse"> -The little HAPPY FAIRY, who drives away dull care,</div><div class="verse"> -And makes all things upon the earth seem ever bright and fair.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -She'll whisper to good Santa to bring what you most wish;</div><div class="verse"> -So if you have been longing for a fine pudding dish,</div><div class="verse"> -He will not, as in by-gone years, forget and bring to you</div><div class="verse"> -Something that you do not want, though beautiful and new.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The HAPPY FAIRY'S MAGIC is in this wondrous leaf,</div><div class="verse"> -Which drives away all "bogies," and banishes all grief;</div><div class="verse"> -So if you would be happy, wealthy, wise and well.</div><div class="verse"> -Kiss the MAGIC WISHING LEAF from HAPPY FAIRY'S DELL.</div> -</div> -</div></div> -</div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_7">[7]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="PREFACE"><span class="xlarge">PREFACE</span></h2> -</div> -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image007" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image007.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<p>This little book is dedicated to all of my relatives and to the following -friends:</p> - -<p>Mrs. Lucy Dillard Tabb Okeson, Miss Fannie F. Sams. Mr. and Mrs. -William Webb, Misses Blanche, Helen and Wydie Webb, Mrs. William -Sharp, Mrs. McAlpine, Miss Rebekah McAlpine, Mrs. John C. Taylor, -Dr. and Mrs. Adams, Walter and Forestall Adams, Miss Isabelle Nusbaum, -Virginia Leigh Morris, Bertram and Virginius Nusbaum, Mr. Albert -Warrington, Neely Warrington, Mr. and Mrs. M. G. Nusbaum, Mrs. -Charles Rowland, Elsie Rowland, Fred Riddle, Barry and Wilson Dodson, -Eugenie and Richard Jones, Christine Neubauer, of Norfolk, Virginia.</p> - -<p>Doctor Zamenhof, Warsaw, Poland; Prof. George Macloskie, LL. D. -D. Sc., of Princeton University; Mrs. George Macloskia, Princeton, N. J.; -M. Edmond Privat, Geneva, Switzerland; Mr. Sharon O. Brown, Providence, -R. I.; Mr. Charles E. Randall, Seattle, Washington; Mrs. William -Westcott, Holley, N. Y.; Mr. and Mrs. William Warren, Newburgh, Ind.</p> - -<p>Mr. Arthur Baker, Mr. and Mrs. Frederick Guthrie, Mrs. A. R. Hornbrook, -Dr. Walter H. Fox, Miss Berthe Papot, Miss Dorothy Millican, Miss -Polly Young, of Chicago, Illinois.</p> - -<p>Prof. Edwin C. Reed, Washington, D. C.; Mrs. Wilbur F. Crafts, of -the Christian Herald: Dr. D. O. S. Lowell, of Roxbury Latin School; -Rev. Horace Dutton, of the Christian Endeavor World; Dr. William Gray -Nowell, Mr. John Fogg Twombly, Miss Eugenie Ohman, of Boston, Mass.; -Edwin and Dorothy Ehrman, of Rockport, Ind.; Dr. W. Addis, Guaymas, -Mexico; Mrs. Maybelle Anderson, Haverhill, Mass.; Miss Ella Thomas, -Monterey, Cal.; Dorothy Kirk, DesMoines, Iowa, Miss J. E. Hamand, -Schaller, Iowa; Mrs. Annie H. McDermid, Fontanelle, Iowa; Mrs. Robert -Winthrop Barr and Nelson Barr, Chattanooga, Tenn.; Mrs. Maria T. Bird, -Rockland, Maine: Mr. Harry Warren, Mr. Frank Kirkpatrick, Cincinnati, -Ohio; Miss Ruth Rickinson, Columbus, Ohio; Dr. Clara Todson and Mr. -Joseph Burila, Elgin, Ill.; Mr. and Mrs. Ellis Dungan, Barton, Ohio; Mr. -Herbert M. Scott, Moundsville, W. Va.; Miss Mary F. Kelly Brambleton, -Va.; Mrs. W. W. Davies, Richmond, Va.; Earl Stratton, Jamestown, N. Y.; -Miss Lois L. White and Mrs. W. D. Christman, Washington, Pa.; Max -Bosquet, Roanne et Loire, France; Miss Emily Allen, Miss Jessie and -Mary Eggleson, Dr. Levi Old, of Norfolk, Va.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_8">[8]</span></p> - -<p>Mrs. Linna Hennig Sherman, Miss Adaline Sherman, Mrs. Flora Williams, -Mrs. Alma Shafer, Dr. W. S. Hamilton, Prof. Walter Ross, Prof. -C. C. Brilles, Mr. and Mrs. C. M. Vester, Mrs. J. W. Bryan, Miss Elizabeth -Dean, Miss Margaret O'Brien, of Wheeling, W. Va.</p> - -<p>Mrs. John Speed, Memphis. Tenn.; Mr. Frank Royster, Colorado -Springs, Col.; Dr. Chase, Galveston, Texas; Prof. John E. McFadyen, Mr. -and Mrs. Max Arno Frind, Mr. Robert Sangster, of Toronto, Canada.</p> - -<p>Mrs. Lyde Morrow Petty, Miss Edith Edeburn, Leicester and Kenneth -Fisher, of Pittsburg, Pa.; Mr. and Mrs. Henry D. King, Mr. James -G. Diller, of Brooklyn, N. Y.; Lieutenant Arthur Crenshaw, U. S. N.; -Mrs. Arthur Crenshaw, Shanghai, China; Major H. W. Yemans, U. S. A.; -Capt. G. W. Kirkpatrick, U. S. A.; Francisko Yamota, Osake, Japan.</p> - -<p>Prof. Clayton R. Bowen, Mrs. Margaret Bowen, Meadville, Pa.; -Misses Mame, Jennie and Gwen Leo, Master Chap Leo, Mrs. L. H. Hall, -Mr. and Mrs. Frank Montgomery, Gertrude, Jean and Richard Montgomery. -Mrs. Thompson, Mrs. Lloyd, Mr. J. C. Spencer, Miss Eleanor -Long, of Erie, Pa.</p> - -<p>In Evansville, Indiana: The Editors of "THE COURIER," Mr. -Henry C. Murphy, Mr. Howard Roosa, Mr. Percy Carroll, Mr. Karl Kae -Knecht, Master John Speed Murphy, Miss Josephine Greene, Mr. Alfred -Greene, Master Howard Roosa, Miss O'Hara, Mary Sisson, Virginia -Whittemore, Marjory Moore, Alice Ashby, Martha Denby, Margaret Ruston, -Virginia Clarke, Miss Irene Jenner, Lawrence Jenner, Horace and -Fred Cross, Fritz and Ralph Dryborough, Wesley and John Downer, Oscar -Uhl, Jep Hardig, Raymond Chesley, Walter Weber, Misses Anna and -Ella Runcie, Edna and Alma Speck, Margaret Bacon, Loraine Cutler, -Sallie Whittemore, Salibelle Royster, Janie Sonntag, Katherine Imbusch, -Otilda, Margaret and Katharine Goslee, Harriet Knauth, Katherine Lewis, -Halene Busse, Caroline Patrick, Suzette Dunlevy, Katherine Wellman, -Dorothy Hannett, Mrs. M. O. Fowler, Mr. and Mrs. Walter Runcie, Dr. -L. D. Brose, Mr. Marshall White, Edgar and Melville Garvin, -Dr. and Mrs. W. L. Royster, Ruth Helen Birt, Charles Sherwood, Mr. -Neal Waledn, Mary, Frances, Helen and Hugh Harris, Charlie Donnelly, -Glenn Kirkpatrick, Bertha White.</p> - -<p>Mr. and Mrs. W. F. Wocher, Mrs. Katherine Brown, Mrs. John -Candee Dean, Mrs. William Turner, Miss Mary McEvoy, Miss Ethel Black -Kealing, of Indianapolis, Ind.</p> - -<p>Mrs. Anna Chase Brainard, Dr. S. Y. Howell, Mr. Edward F. Graham, -Mr. Russell R. Johnson, of Buffalo, N. Y., Dr. and Mrs. W. Baker, -Terre Haute, Ind.</p> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="center"><span id="plate_1">Plate 1</span></p> -<div class="bbox2 center"> -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="plate_008-1year_age" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/plate_008-1year-age.jpg" alt="" /></div> -<p class="caption center">[AUTHOR AT ONE YEAR OLD]</p> -</div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_9">[9]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Pets_Christmas_Carol"><span class="font1 large">The Pet's Christmas Carol</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image009a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image009a.jpg" alt="" /> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -"Tweet-tweet-tweet!" sang the canary,</div><div class="verse"> -Which meant that he was very merry,</div><div class="verse"> -Because his little mistress Nell,</div><div class="verse"> -On Christmas eve had fed him well.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -"Bow-wow-wow!" sang the gay young pup,</div><div class="verse"> -"My master's gone away to sup,</div><div class="verse"> -But though he won't be here for tea,</div><div class="verse"> -Just see the meal he left for me!"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -"Mew-mew-mew!" sang the mamma cat,</div><div class="verse"> -"Such milk as this will make me fat,</div><div class="verse"> -And oh, I feel so very gay</div><div class="verse"> -This cold and frosty Christmas day."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Each mamma cow sang "Moo-moo-moo!"</div><div class="verse"> -And gentle dove sang "Coo-coo-coo!"</div><div class="verse"> -And every horse and sheep and pig,</div><div class="verse"> -And duck and chicken, small and big,</div><div class="verse"> -A carol sang on Christmas eve,</div><div class="verse"> -Because a FEAST each did receive.</div> -</div> -</div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image009b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image009b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Great_Surprise"><span class="font1 large">A Great Surprise</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Mother and Daddy.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -On the nineteenth day of August, in the year of nineteen two,</div><div class="verse"> -Most kind and gracious Madame Stork right over Norfolk flew,</div><div class="verse"> -And brought to my dear mother there a wonderful surprise,</div><div class="verse"> -A little red brown baby girl with large blackberry eyes.</div><div class="verse"> -Now, mother she had asked the stork to bring to her much joy,</div><div class="verse"> -And drop a bundle at her door containing a wee boy,</div><div class="verse"> -But when the stork made a mistake and brought just little me,</div><div class="verse"> -She thought that I was better far than any boy could be.</div><div class="verse"> -And wrapped me in the blanket which she'd planned for my wee brother,</div><div class="verse"> -And which my dear "MA MIE" had knit to help my busy mother.</div><div class="verse"> -She changed the name of Lionel to little Winifred,</div><div class="verse"> -And all the things for brother planned, she gave to me instead.</div> -</div> -</div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_10">[10]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Santas_Reindeer_In_The_Sky"><span class="font1 large">Santa's Reindeer In The Sky</span></h2> -</div> -<p class="cb">(Written for Grandmother Sackville.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image010" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image010.jpg" alt="" /> -<p class="caption center">[SANTA'S AEROPLANE]</p> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Long, long ago, before this earth had any girls and boys</div><div class="verse"> -To hang their stockings on the shelf, expecting Christmas toys,</div><div class="verse"> -Good Santa was a big white cloud that floated in the sky;</div><div class="verse"> -if you had lived in those old days, you'd seen him floating by. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But when the children came to rule upon good Mother Earth,</div><div class="verse"> -She took kind Santa from the sky and made him God of Mirth;</div><div class="verse"> -To bring at every Christmas time good gifts to girls and boys</div><div class="verse"> -And make them all so happy with a lot of lovely toys. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Far, far among the icebergs, in the cold and freezing zone,</div><div class="verse"> -She built for him a palace, where he lives almost alone,</div><div class="verse"> -With only good old Mrs. Claus to keep him company,</div><div class="verse"> -And sometimes Cousin Nicholas for two days or for three. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Wise Mother Earth she knew this clime would suit good Santa well,</div><div class="verse"> -For here no foolish, idle folks would ever come to dwell;</div><div class="verse"> -Nor pay the good Saint visits which would waste his precious time,</div><div class="verse"> -While he could work much faster here than in a warmer clime. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But never did he suffer from the icebergs at the Pole,</div><div class="verse"> -As Fairies kept his fireplace all full of red hot coal;</div><div class="verse"> -Or heaped bright burning logs on it as full as it could hold,</div><div class="verse"> -So Santa never felt at all old Jack Frost's biting cold. -</div></div> -</div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_11">[11]</span></p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Likewise these Fairies brought to him and his most faithful spouse,</div><div class="verse"> -Just everything that they could need to keep a cozy house,</div><div class="verse"> -And even cooked their victuals and brought them every day</div><div class="verse"> -Exactly at the proper time, upon a huge hot tray. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And after they had eaten all the dainties on the tiny,</div><div class="verse"> -The good kind fairies they would come and take the tray away;</div><div class="verse"> -So Mrs. Claus had no excuse for being cross or sad,</div><div class="verse"> -Since no experience she had had with Bridgets getting mad. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -When Santa finished all his toys, he put them in a sack,</div><div class="verse"> -Where he intended carrying them upon his great broad back,</div><div class="verse"> -But Mother Earth surprised the saint and to his palace led</div><div class="verse"> -Eight lovely prancing reindeer and a large commodious sled. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -These reindeer were the cousins of swift Pegasus, the steed</div><div class="verse"> -Who helped the hero Perseus when he was in great need;</div><div class="verse"> -And like the flying hero horse, they lived up in the sky,</div><div class="verse"> -'Till Mother Earth had need of them to help old Santa fly. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And so on every Christmas eve for full ten hundred years,</div><div class="verse"> -Good Santa and his reindeer fleet have banished childrens' tears,</div><div class="verse"> -By bringing them 'most all the gifts their little hearts could wish,</div><div class="verse"> -And filling stockings, shoes and plates and great round pudding dish. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But when last Christmas came around, good Mother Earth she said,</div><div class="verse"> -"Dear Santa I have something fine for you to use instead</div><div class="verse"> -Of your good, faithful reindeer and your big old fashioned sled,</div><div class="verse"> -For here's a lovely aeroplane all painted shining red." -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The wise old lady then declared that he could safely fly</div><div class="verse"> -With this machine 'most anywhere away up in the sky,</div><div class="verse"> -And travel far, far faster than reindeer who were fleet</div><div class="verse"> -But stumbled sometimes on the roofs made slippery with sleet. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The aeroplane could carry well a larger load of toys,</div><div class="verse"> -So he could visit more good girls and also little boys,</div><div class="verse"> -Who live in far off heathen lands where everyone's a sinner,</div><div class="verse"> -But that's no reason each should do without a Christmas dinner. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -With this machine he'd save some time to look out for each pet</div><div class="verse"> -Of all the little girls and boys as they so oft forget</div><div class="verse"> -To treat their pets most kindly upon the Christmas morn</div><div class="verse"> -In memory of the Saviour, who on this day was born. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And likewise all the horses, the cows and pigs and sheep,</div><div class="verse"> -For men so seldom think of them when Christmas time they keep;</div><div class="verse"> -And even wild, fierce animals, and fishes in the sea,</div><div class="verse"> -Should all be made quite happy at Christmas time to be. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -"I do not like this plan at all of giving up my sled</div><div class="verse"> -And my good faithful reindeer," so good old Santa said.</div><div class="verse"> -But Mother Earth she laughed at him and said she would repay</div><div class="verse"> -The reindeer, whom she would send home, straight to the milky way. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But Santa was old fashioned and had great fears to fly</div><div class="verse"> -Without his sled and reindeer, he'd used in years gone by,</div><div class="verse"> -And begged that on his maiden trip these true old friends to take</div><div class="verse"> -To help him should the aeroplane prove but a wicked fake.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_12">[12]</span></p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The laughing Earth she granted him this very small request,</div><div class="verse"> -And early on glad Christmas eve (the eve of all most blest),</div><div class="verse"> -He started forth upon his trip, did good old Santa, dear,</div><div class="verse"> -Guiding his Wright aeroplane with feelings of great fear. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But Mother Earth showed she was wise and knew just what was best</div><div class="verse"> -To help the good old tired saint while on his children quest;</div><div class="verse"> -And fast the good Wright aeroplane it flew both low and high,</div><div class="verse"> -So Santa took the Earth's advice, and though he heaved a sigh, -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -He dropped the poor old worn out sled as he was passing by,</div><div class="verse"> -And people said, who saw it fall, "A METEOR FROM THE SKY!"</div><div class="verse"> -Then kissing each good reindeer, he bade them all farewell,</div><div class="verse"> -And left them in the MILKY WAY, forever there to dwell. -</div></div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And you, my little children, who have heard the tiny hoofs</div><div class="verse"> -Of the little flying steeds pattering on the roofs,</div><div class="verse"> -If you would like to catch a glimpse of Santa's good reindeer,</div><div class="verse"> -Then wait until it's dark some night, and when the sky is clear,</div><div class="verse"> -You'll see them very plainly in the broad light MILKY WAY,</div><div class="verse"> -And there for all the time to come, these steeds will romp and play. -</div></div> -</div></div> - - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image012a" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image012a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image012b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image012b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="cb">Written for my Godmother, Mrs. Lucy Dillard Tabb Okeson, of Norfolk, Va.</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When I was one year old,</div><div class="verse"> -So often I've been told,</div><div class="verse"> -Dear "Ma Mie" sang to me</div><div class="verse"> -This cunning poetry:</div><div class="verse"> -"Mousie, pousie, wousie,</div><div class="verse"> -In the Boush Street Housie,"</div><div class="verse"> -And always from that time</div><div class="verse"> -I've loved to make a rhyme,</div><div class="verse"> -So if it be my fate</div><div class="verse"> -To write a poem great,</div><div class="verse"> -Then dearest, sweet "Ma Mie,"</div><div class="verse"> -The praise belongs to thee.</div> -</div></div></div> -</div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_13">[13]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Nissen_The_Santa_Claus_of_Norway"><span class="font1 large">Nissen, The Santa Claus of Norway</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="image013" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image013.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[<span class="smcap">Nissen</span>]</p> - -<p class="cb">(The story told in this rhyme was sent to the author by her globe-trotting -friend, Mrs. William Westcott, from Christiana, Norway.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -How glad I am that I was born in this land very dear,</div><div class="verse"> -Where children have a Santa Claus of whom they have no fear;</div><div class="verse"> -A Santa who is always kind, remembering one and all,</div><div class="verse"> -When every year at Christmas time, he pays us all a call.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -In far away chill Norway, there NISSEN is the name</div><div class="verse"> -Of the Christmas visitor who bears good Santa's fame;</div><div class="verse"> -But he's a naughty brownie, so short and very small;</div><div class="verse"> -Not a bit like Santa, who is large and fat and tall.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But like our good gift giver, his beard is long and white,</div> -<div class="verse"> -And he wears a coat of furs and many colors bright;</div> -<div class="verse"> -But instead of bringing goodies to good girls and to boys,</div> -<div class="verse"> -Nice new clothes and books and games and lots of wondrous toys.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -He expects that all the big folks and also little ones,</div> -<div class="verse"> -Should leave his favorite dishes, such as puddings, cakes and buns,</div> -<div class="verse"> -Outside of every doorway, so that he may eat at will</div> -<div class="verse"> -Of these luscious dainties until he has had his fill.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Then after eating all the cakes his "Tummy-tum" can hold,</div><div class="verse"> -He milks the cows and splits the wood (at least so I've been told),</div><div class="verse"> -But never thinks to bring nice gifts to little girls and boys,</div><div class="verse"> -Whose parents have to trim their trees and buy them all their toys.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Besides, this naughty NISSEN is cross at times and bad,</div><div class="verse"> -And does all sorts of horrid tricks, which I think very sad</div><div class="verse"> -At Christmas, when we all should be so kind to one another</div><div class="verse"> -And treat each person whom we meet as if he were our brother.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But NISSEN steals away the cows and even horses fleet,</div><div class="verse"> -From all the people who forget to bake him puddings sweet;</div><div class="verse"> -And if above a whisper one should dare to speak or sing</div><div class="verse"> -About this cranky fellow, then this evil he will bring</div><div class="verse"> -Upon the one who dared to throw, his name upon the breeze,</div><div class="verse"> -As from that time the guilty one must sneeze and sneeze and sneeze.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_14">[14]</span></p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Now in our land we sing loud praise of Santa all the time,</div><div class="verse"> -And tell about his goodness great, in prose and jingling rhyme;</div><div class="verse"> -And yet it seems the more we sing about the jolly elf,</div><div class="verse"> -The more he brings each year to us upon the mantel shelf.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But children in far Norway are better girls and boys</div><div class="verse"> -Than we who live in this fair land and think so much of toys,</div><div class="verse"> -That we forget about the pets while feeding our own selves,</div><div class="verse"> -Like thoughtless, greedy little pigs or naughty selfish elves.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -While Norway children in the fall they work to gather corn,</div><div class="verse"> -And save it for the birds they feed on every Christmas morn,</div><div class="verse"> -So we should follow in their steps and feed the wee birds crumbs,</div><div class="verse"> -Before we start to feast ourselves on Christmas sugar plums.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="After_The_Fourth_Was_Over"><span class="font1 large">After The Fourth Was Over</span></h2> -</div> -<p class="cb">(Written for Uncle Lionel Sackville.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image014a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image014a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<p class="caption center">[NISSEN PLAYING TRICKS]</p> -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image014b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image014b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -After the Fourth was over, after the play was done,</div><div class="verse"> -Poor little John and Willie forgot that they'd had some fun;</div><div class="verse"> -John, with his eyes all bandaged, Willie with one eye gone,</div><div class="verse"> -Had changed from joyous boys, who rose with the FOURTH'S bright dawn,</div><div class="verse"> -Determined to shoot great cannons and frighten some silly girls,</div><div class="verse"> -To tie big crackers to dogs' tails, and make the pin wheels whirl.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Tommy with one hand bound up and with a bepowdered face,</div><div class="verse"> -Alex with two burned fingers and bones nearly all out of place;</div><div class="verse"> -Edgar with one leg broken and poor little Peter with two,</div><div class="verse"> -Thought that they'd had enough sorrow to last them a whole life through,</div><div class="verse"> -But mother, who heard them crying, while soothing her darlings to sleep,</div><div class="verse"> -Was thankful that some of the pieces she yet was able to keep,</div><div class="verse"> -And sad for the weeping mother of poor naughty, unlucky Jim,</div><div class="verse"> -As the booming JULY CELEBRATION blew the whole head off of him.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_15">[15]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Kitten_Gone_To_Waste"><span class="font1 large">A Kitten Gone To Waste</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(This story was told to the author by Mrs. William Warren, of Newburgh, -Indiana.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image015a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image015a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -When little Mary Alice was only three years old,</div><div class="verse"> -She went upon a visit to Aunt Maria Hold,</div><div class="verse"> -A lady who was noted for saving everything,</div><div class="verse"> -From gold and silver dollars down to a turkey wing.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -She soon taught Mary Alice to never throw away</div><div class="verse"> -A single bit of anything which might be used "some day,"</div><div class="verse"> -And Alice, who was clever, she learned to put away</div><div class="verse"> -All bits of ribbon, cloth and lace, and chicken feathers gay.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Each day she kept quite busy hunting something more</div><div class="verse"> -Which she could take to Auntie or add to her own store;</div><div class="verse"> -And one day in excitement, she ran in greatest haste,</div><div class="verse"> -Crying, "Oh, dear Auntie, sumfins don to waste!</div><div class="verse"> -A perfectlee dood kitty is thrown out on the dump</div><div class="verse"> -Of the kitchen ash-pile, behind the garden pump!"</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image015b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image015b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_New_Baby"><span class="font1 large">The New Baby</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Alfred Greene, Jr., Evansville, Indiana.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -When Alfred saw the baby wee the stork to him had brought,</div><div class="verse"> -He stood quite silent for a while and thought and thought and thought</div><div class="verse"> -Until he'd solved the problem about the CURIOUS ONE</div><div class="verse"> -Who'd traveled far from Storkland, though she couldn't walk nor run.</div><div class="verse"> -Then to his mother he declared in accents of dismay,</div><div class="verse"> -"Dear mother we must send this kid back to her home to-day,</div><div class="verse"> -'Cause someone's cheated us I know and brought us an old child</div><div class="verse"> -With bald head and without a tooth and like an Indian wild."</div><div class="verse"> -Whenever it begins to cry it almost lifts the roof,</div><div class="verse"> -So mother, dear, I think 'tis best for you to keep aloof</div><div class="verse"> -From the old ugly Indian thing and send it to Stork-land,</div><div class="verse"> -Then you and I'll be glad again and go to hear the band.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_16">[16]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Woes_Caused_By_Whooping_Bugs"><span class="font1 large">Woes Caused By Whooping Bugs</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Cousin Harvey Stoner, Jr.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image016a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image016a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -If you don't believe that whooping cough causes lots of woe,</div><div class="verse"> -Just catch a few of whooping germs and then I guess you'll know</div><div class="verse"> -That whoopee-whoop! and wheepee-wheeps! are not one bit of fun,</div><div class="verse"> -When you see others playing games where all must jump and run,</div><div class="verse"> -For if you jump or if you run, you start the whoop-oop-oop!</div><div class="verse"> -And even when you're tired you can't sleep for the croup,</div><div class="verse"> -Caused by the awful whooping bugs, which lurk within your throat</div><div class="verse"> -And make your voice sound hoarser than the singing of a goat.</div> -</div> - -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -For fear of spreading whooping-bugs you certainly can't go</div><div class="verse"> -To Sunday-school or other school, or even to a show,</div><div class="verse"> -But you must stay at home ALONE from three to six long weeks,</div><div class="verse"> -And listen to your croaking voice, which whoops and sometimes squeaks.</div><div class="verse"> -So therefore take the good advice of a little girl who knows,</div><div class="verse"> -And stay away from WHOOPING-COUGH, which causes lots of woes.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image016b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image016b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="How_Simple_Simon_Became_Wise"><span class="font1 large">How Simple Simon Became Wise</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for "St. Nicholas," February, 1909.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Simple Simon met young Heiman reading from a book,</div><div class="verse"> -Said Simple Simon to young Heiman, "Let me have a look?"</div><div class="verse"> -Said young Heiman to Simple Simon, "I will not selfish be,</div><div class="verse"> -My great delight, ST. NICHOLAS, I'll gladly let you see."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Then Simple Simon and young Heiman spent an hour or two</div><div class="verse"> -Reading from this wondrous book, so full of all that's true,</div><div class="verse"> -And when they'd finished Simon lad of Mother Goose's fame,</div><div class="verse"> -By virtue of his knowledge great, WISE SIMON, he became.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="center"><span id="plate_2">Plate 2</span></p> -<div class="bbox2 center"> -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="plate_016-2_years_age" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/plate_016-2-years-age.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[AUTHOR AT TWO YEARS OLD]</p> -</div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_17">[17]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Too_Many_Dolls"><span class="font1 large">Too Many Dolls</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Wydie Webb, of Norfolk, Va.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Miss Margaret Mary Elizabeth May,</div><div class="verse"> -Had one hundred dollies with which she could play,</div><div class="verse"> -There were bisque dolls and wax dolls and dolls with real hair,</div><div class="verse"> -Red dolls and black dolls and dolls that were fair,</div><div class="verse"> -Fat dolls and plump dolls and dolls in the style,</div><div class="verse"> -Hipless and jointless and dressed in a smile;</div><div class="verse"> -Rag dolls and wood dolls and celluloid boys,</div><div class="verse"> -China and paper and Jumping Jack Joys;</div><div class="verse"> -Irish and Scotch dolls and dolls from Paris,</div><div class="verse"> -And all of the strange lands from over the sea;</div><div class="verse"> -Japies and Chinese and dark Esquimos,</div><div class="verse"> -Dutchies and Germans and cutest Dagoes;</div><div class="verse"> -Dollies from Egypt and dollies from Spain,</div><div class="verse"> -Hindoos and Hebrews and one little Dane.</div><div class="verse"> -From Poland and Russia they'd traveled afar</div><div class="verse"> -By railroad and steamer and also by car</div><div class="verse"> -To join other dollies from Johnnie Bull's home,</div><div class="verse"> -And lovely Italians from far away Rome.</div><div class="verse"> -From Greenland and Iceland, Norway and Greece,</div><div class="verse"> -The string of these dollies seemed never to cease.</div><div class="verse"> -But Margaret Mary Elizabeth May</div><div class="verse"> -Could never decide with which doll to play,</div><div class="verse"> -So she was not happy as poor little Sue,</div><div class="verse"> -Who in her doll family had only two</div><div class="verse"> -Wretched rag dollies without any hair,</div><div class="verse"> -But which she considered a most lovely pair,</div><div class="verse"> -And these ugly dollies they gave her delight,</div><div class="verse"> -As with them she played from morning 'till night.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image016c" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image016c.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Cat_Extincted_The_Canary"><span class="font1 large">The Cat Extincted The Canary</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Josephine Greene, Evansville, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image017" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image017.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Josephine," asked the teacher, "can you tell to me</div><div class="verse"> -Any bird that's now extinct, but used on earth to be?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -"Oh, yes, Miss Jane," said Josephine, "our sweet canary, Jim,</div><div class="verse"> -Because the naughty pussy cat she quite extincted him."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_18">[18]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Boys_Complaint"><span class="font1 large">A Boy's Complaint</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for John Speed Murphy, Evansville, Indiana.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp75" id="image018a" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image018a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Grandma calls me Johnnie, father calls me John,</div><div class="verse"> -My sweetheart calls me Buddy, and the boys call me Don,</div><div class="verse"> -But mother, oh dear mother, whenever I come near,</div><div class="verse"> -She calls me darling BABY and sometimes "BABY DEAR."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -I like the name of Johnnie, I'm proud of my name John,</div><div class="verse"> -I don't mind hearing Buddy and the shorter name of Don,</div><div class="verse"> -But though I love dear mother far more than all the rest,</div><div class="verse"> -Her name of DARLING BABY I thoroughly detest.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -You see when I am playing with boys in the street,</div><div class="verse"> -And pitching ball or doing some extraordinary feat,</div><div class="verse"> -It makes me feel so little to hear my mother call,</div><div class="verse"> -"Watch out my darling BABY, be careful lest you fall!"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -I'm not a darling baby, nor little baby dear,</div><div class="verse"> -I'm quite a great big boy and have no baby fear,</div><div class="verse"> -But I can't stand the guying the boys give to me,</div><div class="verse"> -When mother starts to calling that hateful name—"BABEE."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image018b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image018b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Koppa_After_Pi"><span class="font1 large">Koppa After Pi</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -I've very little Latin and very little Greek</div><div class="verse"> -Stored away in my small brain, which yet is very weak,</div><div class="verse"> -But one thing I'll remember, I think until I die,</div><div class="verse"> -And that is that the KOPPA follows after PI.</div><div class="verse"> -And mother says perhaps this solves the very reason why</div><div class="verse"> -The "Kops" they follow after cooks well trained in baking pie.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_19">[19]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Whingwang_Sonnet_Of_An_Easter_Bonnet"><span class="font1 large">A Whingwang Sonnet Of An Easter Bonnet</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Cousin Marian Stoner.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image019" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image019.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Once there was a little girl,</div><div class="verse"> -But she didn't have a curl,</div><div class="verse"> -Though she had an Easter-bonnet</div><div class="verse"> -With ostrich plumes and flowers on it,</div><div class="verse"> -Since like her mother she aspired</div><div class="verse"> -A la mode to be attired.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But when she rose on Easter morn</div><div class="verse"> -With deepest grief her heart was torn,</div><div class="verse"> -For oh, alas! the rain was falling</div><div class="verse"> -In torrents great; to her appalling,</div><div class="verse"> -As well she knew 'twould spoil her bonnet</div><div class="verse"> -With ostrich plumes and flowers on it.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Her hair in papers she had worn</div><div class="verse"> -The whole night through and tortures borne</div><div class="verse"> -In hopes to have a curl or two</div><div class="verse"> -To wear beneath her bonnet new.</div><div class="verse"> -But now, alas, the horrid rain</div><div class="verse"> -Would make her hair all straight again.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And so with fear of straightened hair,</div><div class="verse"> -Which might cause folks to laugh and stare,</div><div class="verse"> -And likewise to protect her bonnet</div><div class="verse"> -With ostrich plumes and flowers on it,</div><div class="verse"> -She thought it best to stay away</div><div class="verse"> -From Sabbath school on Easter day.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_20">[20]</span></p> - -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Giant_Arithmos"><span class="font1 large">The Giant Arithmos</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">This story was told to the author by her teacher, Mrs. A. R. Hornbrook, -of the Hornbrook Correspondence School of Mathematics, 5622 -Ellis Avenue, Chicago, Ill.</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Great Jack-the-Giant-Killer brave, he killed all giants bad,</div><div class="verse"> -But one good giant's life was spared by this bold warrior lad.</div><div class="verse"> -ARITHMOS was this giant great, and all bright girls and boys</div><div class="verse"> -Should love the famous Giant-King far more than all their toys.</div><div class="verse"> -He's very old, and very great, and also wondrous wise,</div><div class="verse"> -For he can count all things on earth and even tell their size.</div><div class="verse"> -He knows how many birds there are; how high each bird can fly,</div><div class="verse"> -But never does he boast, or brag, or stoop to tell a lie.</div><div class="verse"> -He is so tall that he can reach up to the starry sky</div><div class="verse"> -And count the stars and meteors bright as swiftly they go by.</div><div class="verse"> -'Tis he alone can tell you when a great eclipse will come</div><div class="verse"> -And darken the moon's lady or the old man in the sun.</div><div class="verse"> -He's always so good natured and obliging to us all;</div><div class="verse"> -He'll help us with our lessons hard when for his aid we call,</div><div class="verse"> -And tell us just the number of ripe apples on a plate,</div><div class="verse"> -How far away Chicago is, and if the train is late.</div><div class="verse"> -In fact he always answers us whene'er we ask "HOW MANY?"</div><div class="verse"> -And for his work and trouble never thinks to ask a penny.</div><div class="verse"> -All teachers and professors couldn't teach without his aid,</div><div class="verse"> -And men in every business know through him they will be paid.</div><div class="verse"> -We cannot sing in perfect time, nor even play a drum,</div><div class="verse"> -Divide an apple, buy a doll nor do the smallest sum,</div><div class="verse"> -And even BRIDGE by ladies fair cannot at all be played</div><div class="verse"> -Unless this mighty GIANT-KING will kindly lend his aid.</div><div class="verse"> -So as we cannot get along without "ARITHMOS LORE,"</div><div class="verse"> -We all should learn his wondrous truths and love him more and more.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image020" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image020.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Good_Weather_Assured"><span class="font1 large">Good Weather Assured</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for the Evansville Courier, February 3, 1909.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When the second of February rolls around,</div><div class="verse"> -Out of his hole in the cold, dark ground</div><div class="verse"> -Comes Mr. Groundhog to look at the sky</div><div class="verse"> -And see if the season of summer is nigh;</div><div class="verse"> -So that he in the fields may merrily run</div><div class="verse"> -And eat farmers' crops 'neath the light o' the sun.</div><div class="verse"> -But if his own shadow he unfortunately sees,</div><div class="verse"> -In the greatest of terror he falls on his knees,</div><div class="verse"> -And quickly returns to his subterra home,</div><div class="verse"> -Resolving that he will not again roam</div><div class="verse"> -'Till six stormy weeks have slowly gone by</div><div class="verse"> -And then once again, perhaps he will try</div><div class="verse"> -To put his flat head above the cold ground,</div><div class="verse"> -And take a survey of the earth all around.</div><div class="verse"> -So I made up my mind that during the year</div><div class="verse"> -I'd keep him at home so he couldn't appear.</div><div class="verse"> -And to bring wintry weather he hadn't a chance</div><div class="verse"> -For of his own shadow he caught not a glance.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_21">[21]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Roosevelt_Complimented_By_Mama_Lion"><span class="font1 large">Roosevelt Complimented By Mama Lion</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp93" id="image021a" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image021a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -One day last week King Teddy arose with old King Sun,</div><div class="verse"> -And seeing a huge lion, he seized his trusty gun</div><div class="verse"> -And made the King of Jungle-land quickly homeward run,</div><div class="verse"> -While Teddy followed after and thought it lots of fun.</div><div class="verse"> -King Lion reached his cavern home, trembling in great fear,</div><div class="verse"> -But when Queen Lion heard his tale, she simply scratched one ear,</div><div class="verse"> -Then shrugged her shoulders a la hump and to her husband said,</div><div class="verse"> -"In all the best newspapers, how often have I read,</div><div class="verse"> -That Teddy loves all parents who large families possess,</div><div class="verse"> -And I am sure with many cubs our happy den is blessed."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Then brave and proud Queen Lion she carried out each babe,</div><div class="verse"> -And placed it in the doorway of her Afro-Jungle cave;</div><div class="verse"> -And there she proudly waited for King Teddy to appear,</div><div class="verse"> -For of his teeth and of his gun she hadn't any fear.</div><div class="verse"> -The coward King of Jungle Land, he bid himself inside,</div><div class="verse"> -And when he heard King Teddy's voice his bones shook in his hide;</div><div class="verse"> -But soon he knew his tears were vain when Teddy laughing said,</div><div class="verse"> -"As mother of fine sextets, you surely rank ahead</div><div class="verse"> -Of all the lions I have met in circus tent or den,</div><div class="verse"> -To meet you I'm DEE-LIGHTED, and I hope we'll meet again."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image021b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image021b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="All_Dentists_Go_To_Heaven"><span class="font1 large">All Dentists Go To Heaven</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Dr. Richard Morris, Evansville, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -I don't like dentists, because they hurt me</div><div class="verse"> -With horrid bad pinchers as sharp as can be.</div><div class="verse"> -They pick at my teeth and scratch in my head</div><div class="verse"> -Until I begin to wish I were dead.</div><div class="verse"> -But I read in the paper (so I suppose it's so)</div><div class="verse"> -That all of the dentists to Heaven will go,</div><div class="verse"> -Because they are needed away up there</div><div class="verse"> -To make gold crowns for the angels fair.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_22">[22]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Time_Of_His_Life"><span class="font1 large">The Time Of His Life</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written after seeing a cartoon by Mr. Karl Kae Knecht in the -Evansville Courier.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp85" id="image022" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image022.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[ When He Met a School of Twelve Hippopotami]</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -There are many schools of learning and also schools of game,</div><div class="verse"> -But the school with largest members bears KING HIPPO'S name,</div><div class="verse"> -And big and little people, yes even EVANS' FLEET,</div><div class="verse"> -Would think it quite unpleasant a Hippo school to meet.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But Bwana Tumbo Teddy, who knows no thought of fear,</div><div class="verse"> -Laughed in joyous pleasure as the SCHOOL drew near,</div><div class="verse"> -And smiling at the leader, he made her stiff with fright,</div><div class="verse"> -As from his parted mouthpiece his white teeth came in sight.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Then Bwana seized his rifle and taking steady aim,</div><div class="verse"> -He fired at Queen Hippo and made her front legs lame,</div><div class="verse"> -Then shooting at her sisters, and brothers left and right,</div><div class="verse"> -He scattered all the mighty beasts and drove them out of sight.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -All those he killed, this hunter brave, then quickly towed ashore,</div><div class="verse"> -Saying, "I'M DE-LIGHTED, and I hope to meet some more</div><div class="verse"> -SCHOOLS OF HIPPOPOTAMI that feel inclined for strife,</div><div class="verse"> -As in this Hippo-battle I'd the time of my whole life."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_23">[23]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="King_Teddy_The_Fearless"><span class="font1 large">King Teddy, The Fearless</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">The names of tropical diseases mentioned in this rhyme were given -to the author by a young doctor who thought they could not be made to -rhyme.</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -King Teddy has much courage to fight both beasts and men</div><div class="verse"> -With pistols and with broadswords and with the mighty pen.</div><div class="verse"> -And now in Afric jungles he's busy fighting fleas,</div><div class="verse"> -Mosquitoes, and big tigers and monstrous bumble bees;</div><div class="verse"> -Huge elephants, gorillas, and awful Guinea-worms,</div><div class="verse"> -Sloughing phagedaena, and sleeping sickness germs,</div><div class="verse"> -Tinea imbricata, piedra and goundou,</div><div class="verse"> -Malaria and the ainhum, pinta and the sprue,</div><div class="verse"> -Chyluria, mycetoma, leprosy and yaws,</div><div class="verse"> -Afric dysentery and maybe lions' claws,</div><div class="verse"> -Bubonic plague and dengue and dreadful tropic-boils,</div><div class="verse"> -Fevers black and yellow and sometimes serpents' coils,</div><div class="verse"> -Tinea Madagascar, Dhobie itch, screw worms,</div><div class="verse"> -Beri-beri and craw-craw and all the Afric-germs;</div><div class="verse"> -With dread sun-traumatism, and abscess of the liver,</div><div class="verse"> -Yet none of these great terrors can make King Teddy shiver.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image023a" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image023a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Good_Bye_To_Teddy_Bears"><span class="font1 large">Good Bye To Teddy Bears</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Good-bye to all the Teddy Bears, both big and small!</div><div class="verse"> -The "Billy Possums" are in style for one and all,</div><div class="verse"> -We little girls, like older folks, are bound to keep in style,</div><div class="verse"> -And so we have to change our toys most every little while.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When Roosevelt or "Teddy," was ruler o'er this land,</div><div class="verse"> -All stylish girls and clever boys kept bears on hand</div><div class="verse"> -To play with and to walk with and to put to bed at night,</div><div class="verse"> -As "Teddy Bears" were symbols of the Rooseveltian light.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But when King Teddy left his throne, Taft got his seat,</div><div class="verse"> -And soft brown teddies disappeared from home and street,</div><div class="verse"> -While "Billy Possums" came to rule for two years or for three,</div><div class="verse"> -When "BRYAN KITTENS" will be hatched and all the rage will be.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image023b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image023b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Cats_A_Kissin_Catechism"><span class="font1 large">Cats A Kissin (Catechism)</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Cousin Patricia Rehn.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Last week my cousin Patti, who isn't yet quite three,</div><div class="verse"> -Went to our good Sunday School with mother and with me.</div><div class="verse"> -She sat quite still and listened well to all the teacher said,</div><div class="verse"> -Until I thought she stowed away much knowledge in her head.</div><div class="verse"> -But when that evening Auntie asked, "What did my darling hear</div><div class="verse"> -When she went to Sunday school; tell me, won't you, dear?"</div><div class="verse"> -She shrugged her little shoulders and said, "Not anyfing</div><div class="verse"> -Except dey said some funny words and den began to sing;</div><div class="verse"> -Though 'bout de cats a kissin', well, the teacher said you should</div><div class="verse"> -Teach me ev'ry evenin' and den I'd be so dood."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_24">[24]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Hens"><span class="font1 large">Hens</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Aunt Mary Helena Rehn.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp75" id="image024" style="max-width: 31.25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image024.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -What curious birds are common hens!</div><div class="verse"> -They make good broth and even pens.</div><div class="verse"> -They have no teeth, no hair, no nose,</div><div class="verse"> -But sport a comb red as a rose.</div><div class="verse"> -They have no arms or funny bones</div><div class="verse"> -That causes folks to let forth groans,</div><div class="verse"> -Their victuals they all swallow whole</div><div class="verse"> -And use a craw for a chopping bowl.</div><div class="verse"> -They have no hands, they have no wrists,</div><div class="verse"> -And without hands they can't make fists,</div><div class="verse"> -But for one thing they should rejoice</div><div class="verse"> -And cluck aloud with cheerful voice;</div><div class="verse"> -Not having hands, they have no nails,</div><div class="verse"> -Which are the cause of many wails,</div><div class="verse"> -For once a week we girls and boys</div><div class="verse"> -Must put aside our games and toys</div><div class="verse"> -And all our nice exciting tales,</div><div class="verse"> -While mother trims our finger nails.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="center"><span id="plate_3">Plate 3</span></p> -<div class="bbox2"> -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="plate_024-3_years_age" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/plate_024-3-years-age.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[AUTHOR AT THREE YEARS OLD]</p> -</div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_25">[25]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Please_Grandpa_Croak"><span class="font1 large">Please Grandpa, Croak</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image025a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image025a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Grandaddy," said young Harry, "do a good turn for me,</div><div class="verse"> -By croaking like a big bull frog so I can plainly see</div><div class="verse"> -If Daddy told the honest truth or only cracked a joke</div><div class="verse"> -Because he said I'd have some "dough" if you would only croak."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image025b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image025b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Wee_Willies_First_Hair_Cut"><span class="font1 large">Wee Willie's First Hair Cut</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Last Friday, for the first time, wee Willie went with me</div><div class="verse"> -To the colored barber, who bowed most graciously</div><div class="verse"> -And asked the little fellow how should he crop his curls,</div><div class="verse"> -Close to his head, in medium length, or bobbed like little girls?</div><div class="verse"> -Wee Willie answered promptly, "My hair, please, barber, crop</div><div class="verse"> -Like my own dear Daddy's, wif a small round hole on top."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image025c" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image025c.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Wise_Replies"><span class="font1 large">Wise Replies</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Uncle Thomas Cresswell, London, Eng.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Joan of Arc, and who was she?"</div><div class="verse"> -Asked the teacher of little Leigh.</div><div class="verse"> -"Wife of Noah, of course," said she,</div><div class="verse"> -"Who sailed the ark upon the sea."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"John's so wise he laughed at Leigh</div><div class="verse"> -When she tried to answer me,</div><div class="verse"> -So in the future for replies</div><div class="verse"> -We'll always go to John the wise.</div><div class="verse"> -Now what is lava, Johnnie, dear,</div><div class="verse"> -Can it be found in places near?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Why, certainly," said smiling John,</div><div class="verse"> -"Most every day Dad puts it on,</div><div class="verse"> -And covers nearly his whole face</div><div class="verse"> -With lava thick in every place."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_26">[26]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="It_Takes_A_Cigar_A_Long_Time_To_Wear_Out"><span class="font1 large">It Takes A Cigar A Long Time To Wear Out</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Mr. Harry Warren, Cincinnati, Ohio.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image026" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image026.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When Harry Warren was a boy only five years old,</div><div class="verse"> -He wasn't then as he is now, so very big and bold,</div><div class="verse"> -But he was very much afraid of bad tobacco smoke,</div><div class="verse"> -Which seems to those who know him now to be a funny joke.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -He had an uncle on whose knee he loved to sit each day</div><div class="verse"> -And listen to exciting tales about the Pixies gay,</div><div class="verse"> -But when this uncle had a light upon a long cigar,</div><div class="verse"> -Then little Harry used to sit away from it as far</div><div class="verse"> -As he could manage well to get upon his uncle's knee,</div><div class="verse"> -Since Harry feared tobacco smoke more than a bumble bee.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -One day while sitting way far out upon his uncle's knee,</div><div class="verse"> -He grew so very tired as he waited there to see</div><div class="verse"> -The end of the long smoker which made smoke all about</div><div class="verse"> -And said, "It takes that big cigar a long time to wear out."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image026b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image026b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="An_Esperanto_Poem_Plain_To_All"><span class="font1 large">An Esperanto Poem Plain To All</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Prof Macloskie, Princeton University.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Hundido krias—"Bow-wow-wow!"</div><div class="verse"> -Katido krias—"Meow-meow!"</div><div class="verse"> -Bovido krias—"Moo-moo-moo!"</div><div class="verse"> -Kolombo krias—"Coo-coo-coo!"</div><div class="verse"> -Shafido krias—"Baa-baa-baa!"</div><div class="verse"> -Infano krias—"Ma-ma-ma!"</div> -</div></div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_27">[27]</span></p> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Answers_Not_Questions_Cause_Trouble"><span class="font1 large">Answers, Not Questions, Cause Trouble</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">This story was told to the author by Mrs. Frederick Guthrie, of -Chicago, Ill.</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image027" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image027.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<span class="i-2">MOTHER.<br /></span> -<br /> -"Don't bother your father with questions, Ervane,</div><div class="verse"> -He's tired of hearing you ask to explain</div><div class="verse"> -Why fishes can't walk or ride on the land?</div><div class="verse"> -How lizards and fleas can live in the sand?</div><div class="verse"> -What causes the sun to set in the west</div><div class="verse"> -And always to sleep in one golden nest?</div><div class="verse"> -When will the time come for children to fly</div><div class="verse"> -And play in the clouds with the birds in the sky?</div><div class="verse"> -Such foolish, vain questions, they trouble your dad</div><div class="verse"> -And sometimes I fear they make him quite sad."</div><div class="verse"> -</div><div class="verse"> -"No, mother," replied the inquisitive lad,</div><div class="verse"> -"It's the ANSWERS not QUESTIONS that trouble poor Dad."</div><div class="verse"> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_28">[28]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Pure_Blooded_Pup"><span class="font1 large">The Pure Blooded Pup</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Mrs. Anna Chase Brainard, of Buffalo, N. Y.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Once there was a little pup who lived in far off Kent,</div><div class="verse"> -Where he was born some years ago in kennels of Lord Dent;</div><div class="verse"> -His mother was of purest blood and likewise was his Pa,</div><div class="verse"> -So he arrived upon this earth without a single flaw.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -His tail was just the proper size and so was each small ear,</div><div class="verse"> -His shapely legs and nose and paws, they pleased his mother dear;</div><div class="verse"> -And with her soft and scarlet tongue she kissed her baby pup</div><div class="verse"> -And loved him, oh, so dearly, that she almost ate him up.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The keeper of the kennels when he saw this terrier pup,</div><div class="verse"> -Declared, "It's just a beauty and will surely win "THE CUP"</div><div class="verse"> -For being a fox terrier of very purest breed</div><div class="verse"> -And now to my dear master I'll go with greatest speed</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And tell him of this puppy who will bring our kennels fame</div><div class="verse"> -And ask him what he thinks will be a truly proper name</div><div class="verse"> -For the most perfect terrier that ever came to Kent;</div><div class="verse"> -It seems to me he should be called for my great master "Dent."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The master when he heard the news that a new pup had come,</div><div class="verse"> -Left off his game of playing cards and drinking pints of rum,</div><div class="verse"> -And hastened to the kennels to behold the wondrous pup,</div><div class="verse"> -Who at the coming dog show was to win the great prize cup.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The mother dog she wagged her tail, with pride she was puffed up,</div><div class="verse"> -As her great master stood right near and smiled upon her pup,</div><div class="verse"> -While saying, "Higgens, listen well to what I have to say,</div><div class="verse"> -And care for this good mother dog and her fine pup each day.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -I'll name him for my ancestor, the great and famous Kent,</div><div class="verse"> -And in that name to the dog show next year he shall be sent,</div><div class="verse"> -Where I am sure he'll win the prize above all others there</div><div class="verse"> -For he is perfect in his shape and has fine silky hair."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -So little Kent was tended well and petted every day,</div><div class="verse"> -He never had to seek for bones and only had to play,</div><div class="verse"> -And having nothing else to do on mischief he was bent,</div><div class="verse"> -Was this aristocratic pup, owned by the great Lord Dent.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And when a year had passed around, one day the master came</div><div class="verse"> -To take him to the London show, where he would win great fame;</div><div class="verse"> -But Kent was very naughty, as he did not wish to go</div><div class="verse"> -Away from his good kennel home to any prize dog show.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -At last his master whipped Pup Kent and oh, but he did swear</div><div class="verse"> -Because Kent snapped at Higgens, who was combing his fine hair</div><div class="verse"> -And putting on a collar with a chain of golden beads;</div><div class="verse"> -Such ornaments Kent could not see that any puppy needs.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -At last the royal pup was dressed in pupdom regal style,</div><div class="verse"> -And drove in a fine carriage, oh, for many a weary mile,</div><div class="verse"> -Until he came to London town, where nothing he could see,</div><div class="verse"> -Because all things were bidden with a fog as thick as could be.</div> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_29">[29]</span></p> - -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Before he'd even time to think, this 'ristocratic pup,</div><div class="verse"> -He found himself in a small cage with all the doors shut up,</div><div class="verse"> -And many men were standing round and gazing long at him,</div><div class="verse"> -While passing comments on his shape of head, and tail, and limb.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Kent glared at them in silence and he would not wag his tail,</div><div class="verse"> -In fact just like a good young boy who might be put in jail</div><div class="verse"> -When he had never done a thing to break the country's law,</div><div class="verse"> -So felt this little terrier, this pup without a flaw.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And when the judges thought that he should have the ribbon blue</div><div class="verse"> -Because of his most perfect blood shown by the records true,</div><div class="verse"> -He snapped and barked and even bit at those who came quite near</div><div class="verse"> -To tie the lovely ribbon on the neck of "PUPPY DEAR."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -So they decided that despite his wondrous pedigree</div><div class="verse"> -There yet was something in his blood that ought not there to be</div><div class="verse"> -And gave the prize, a silver cup, to a more common dog,</div><div class="verse"> -Who lay so still and quiet that he might have been a log.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But when that evening our Lord Dent beheld with great surprise</div><div class="verse"> -That a less blooded terrier had won the noble prize,</div><div class="verse"> -He felt so very angry that he wished to beat Pup Kent,</div><div class="verse"> -And ordered that the beastly dog should quickly home be sent.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But while poor Kent was going home so sad and in disgrace,</div><div class="verse"> -He got away from Higgens and he found another place</div><div class="verse"> -Far, far away from kennels of the great and wealthy Dent,</div><div class="verse"> -Near to a peaceful village, the runaway he went.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Here he lay down so tired and thought of many a bone,</div><div class="verse"> -Which now was being gnawed each day by his good ma alone,</div><div class="verse"> -Since Dent, her darling puppy boy, was oh, so far away,</div><div class="verse"> -Oh, how he wished to gnaw a bone with his good ma this day!</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -But as he lay a dreaming of lovely things to eat,</div><div class="verse"> -Quite suddenly a large gray rat ran right across his feet,</div><div class="verse"> -And after it there followed an Irishman named Pat,</div><div class="verse"> -Who sought to make a timely end of bad old Mister Rat.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Big Pat was armed with a huge club and called to his old dog,</div><div class="verse"> -"Now, come along ye lazy baste, before he's in the bog!"</div><div class="verse"> -Then Kent he jumped and in one bound he seized poor Mister Rat,</div><div class="verse"> -Shook him about 'till he was dead and then brought him to Pat.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Big Pat he gazed in wonder at the clever little dog,</div><div class="verse"> -And sitting down upon a large and green moss covered log,</div><div class="verse"> -Said, "Shure, ye bate this lazy hound that kennot catch a rat,</div><div class="verse"> -And if ye'll stay right here, me boy, I'll trate ye well," says Pat.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -Then proudly Kent he wagged his tail and tried so hard to smile</div><div class="verse"> -Upon the good old Irishman, who patted him awhile,</div><div class="verse"> -Then coaxed the stranger after him right through a broad green lane,</div><div class="verse"> -Which led to the fine country home of good Sir Michael Kane.</div> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_30">[30]</span></p> - -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -And here Pat introduced the pup to all the family,</div><div class="verse"> -And they were all so very kind as any folks could be,</div><div class="verse"> -They patted his soft silky hair and praised him to the sky,</div><div class="verse"> -And gave him a big gravy dish all filled with nice meat pie,</div><div class="verse"> -And likewise a huge saucer, which was full of real sweet cream,</div><div class="verse"> -Which made the hungry doggie think that he was in a dream.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -So here Dog Kent decided was the best place for to dwell,</div><div class="verse"> -And here he still is living and is feeling very well.</div><div class="verse"> -He goes each morning to the barn and helps his good friend Pat</div><div class="verse"> -To catch the naughty rodents, who are called the name of RAT.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The cook she feeds him daily, and he captures all the mice,</div><div class="verse"> -Which love to haunt the kitchen of the cleanly Bridget Bryce.</div><div class="verse"> -While little Mikey loves dear Kent far more than all his toys,</div><div class="verse"> -And says he'd rather play with him than any girls or boys,</div><div class="verse"> -Because he never minds a bit to jump right in the pond</div><div class="verse"> -And bring to land a stick or stone or weeping willow wand.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -He always acts politely to all who may come near,</div><div class="verse"> -And so all strangers pet him and think he is a dear.</div><div class="verse"> -They like his soft and silky hair, which proves he has good blood,</div><div class="verse"> -And never does he make folks mad by tracking floors with mud.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -He's wiser than most common dogs, whose hair is rough and coarse,</div><div class="verse"> -His bark is always pleasant, and 'tis never loud nor hoarse;</div><div class="verse"> -He's swifter also than slow dogs who cannot catch a rat,</div><div class="verse"> -Because they always eat too much and get so very fat.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<span class="i-2">MORAL.<br /></span> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -This story proves that good, pure blood is a fine thing to own,</div><div class="verse"> -But it can't help the puppies or the children all alone,</div><div class="verse"> -Unless these youthful puppies and the children, very small,</div><div class="verse"> -Learn to keep quite busy and to have a smile for all.</div> -</div> -</div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image030a" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image030a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Too_ticklish_to_Count_His_Ribs"><span class="font1 large">Too ticklish to Count His Ribs</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Richard Montgomery, Erie, Pa.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image030b" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image030b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -In the class of physiology the teacher asked one day,</div><div class="verse"> -How many ribs have you, my boy, tell me, Dickie Gray?</div><div class="verse"> -And wiggling, giggling Dickie very promptly made reply,</div><div class="verse"> -"Dear teacher, I must tell the truth, for I could never lie,</div><div class="verse"> -But as for ribs I cannot say how many I possess,</div><div class="verse"> -For I'm too awful ticklish to count them, I confess."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_31">[31]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Young_Mail_Carrier"><span class="font1 large">The Young Mail Carrier</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Mr. and Mrs. W. F. Wocher, Indianapolis, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image031a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image031a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Young Billy from his lovely home disappeared one day,</div><div class="verse"> -And when his mother missed her lad she thought he'd run away,</div><div class="verse"> -But soon the sprightly little chap came quickly running back,</div><div class="verse"> -Bearing on his shoulders small, a large round leather sack,</div><div class="verse"> -And said, "Dear mother, I have been a very good, kind boy,</div><div class="verse"> -Trying like the Bible says, to bring our neighbors joy.</div><div class="verse"> -I played I was a postman and I paid each one a call,</div><div class="verse"> -And to the people in this block, I gave them letters, all."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -MOTHER: "But where, my precious little lad, my darling, honey pet,</div><div class="verse"> -Where in the name of goodness these letters did you get?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -BILLY: "I found them with no trouble; they were the ones that you</div><div class="verse"> -Kept in your top bureau drawer, all tied with ribbons blue."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image031b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image031b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="On_Thanksgiving"><span class="font1 large">On Thanksgiving</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Before you eat good turkey, rich mince and pumpkin pies</div><div class="verse"> -On that great feast or feast days when "tum-tums" grow in size,</div><div class="verse"> -The good old day THANKSGIVING, the best day in the year,</div><div class="verse"> -When all should be so thankful around the board of cheer,</div><div class="verse"> -Then don't forget the poor ones, the hungry, cold and sad,</div><div class="verse"> -Go fill their empty tables and make the whole world glad.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_32">[32]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Living_Valentines_Presented_By_Cupid"><span class="font1 large">Living Valentines Presented By Cupid</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">Written February, 1909, for an entertainment at St. Paul's Episcopal -Sunday School, Evansville, Ind.</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "I'm glad to see you all to-night,</div><div class="verse"> -And it will give my heart delight</div><div class="verse"> -Some lovely valentines to show</div><div class="verse"> -And make you wish you had a beau." (SHOWS BOW.)</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">FIRST PICTURE—A SUNBONNET BABY.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "Here's a little baby fair,</div><div class="verse"> -But you can't see her face or hair."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -BABY: "I'm some one who loves you (POINTING AT AUDIENCE).</div><div class="verse"> -Can't you guess who?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">SECOND PICTURE—BOY WEARING A LARGE HAT AND WITH</span></div><div class="verse"> -BACK TURNED TO THE AUDIENCE.</div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "Here's another, called 'GUESS WHO,'</div><div class="verse"> -Come to say, 'How do you do.'"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -BOY: "I'm for my own dear valentine.</div><div class="verse"> -Guess me and I'll be thine."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">THIRD PICTURE—HEART'S DELIGHT.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "This is Heart's Delight,</div><div class="verse"> -Look at her face, so beaming bright."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -HEART'S DELIGHT: "If you love me, oh, my dear,</div><div class="verse"> -This is how I will appear." (SMILES AND SINGS A SONG.)</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">FOURTH PICTURE—HEART'S SORROW.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "Watch this poor aching heart of sorrow,</div><div class="verse"> -He'll cry all day and perhaps to-morrow.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -HEART'S SORROW: "If you do not love me, dear,</div><div class="verse"> -This is how I will appear."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -FIFTH PICTURE—TWO JAPS.</div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "Allow me the pleasure to show to thee</div><div class="verse"> -A very sweet picture from over the sea."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">THE JAPS HOLD FANS IN FRONT OF FACES AND SING:</span></div><div class="verse"> -"Jap a ling a ling, Jap aling a lee,</div><div class="verse"> -You're my Jappie baby,</div><div class="verse"> -If you lovee me as I lovee you</div><div class="verse"> -No knife can cut our love in two."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "I'll tell you what they said,</div><div class="verse"> -I'm sure they mean to wed.</div><div class="verse"> -Cho, cho, cho, cho, nano hagi tomare</div><div class="verse"> -Nano haga eyay nawraw teni tomare.</div><div class="verse"> -Dai dai mushi, dai dai mushi</div><div class="verse"> -Tsuno chitto dashare</div><div class="verse"> -Ame kaze foku kara tsuno chitto dashare."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">SIXTH PICTURE—FRENCH VALENTINE.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "Now I'll show you a lady from far away France</div><div class="verse"> -Who says, 'Parlez-vous' and knows how to dance."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -FRENCH VALENTINE: "Je vous aime, je vous adore</div><div class="verse"> -Que voulez-vous de plus encore?"</div><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">FRENCH VALENTINE DANCES.</span></div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">SEVENTH PICTURE—GERMAN VALENTINE.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "This is a lady who wants a beau,</div><div class="verse"> -In her own language she'll tell you so."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -GERMAN VALENTINE: "Ich liebe dich, lieben sie mich?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">EIGHTH PICTURE—COMIC VALENTINE.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "This a comic, to make you smile,</div><div class="verse"> -And keep you good humored a little while."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">COMIC, HOLDING A LARGE GRAVY SPOON IN ONE HAND, YELLOW</span></div><div class="verse"> -MOON IN OTHER.</div><div class="verse"> -"Of all earthly joys, I love best to spoon</div><div class="verse"> -With thee, oh, my darling, 'neath the light o' the moon."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">NINTH PICTURE—ANOTHER COMIC.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "Another comic will now appear,</div><div class="verse"> -I hope that you his plea will hear."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">BOY DRESSED IN RIDICULOUS COSTUME, KNEELING AND</span></div><div class="verse"> -HOLDING A CARDBOARD HEART:</div><div class="verse"> -BOY: "My heart is thine, my soul is thine,</div><div class="verse"> -Won't you be my valentine?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">TENTH PICTURE—THE OLD-FASHIONED VALENTINE.</span></div><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "The pleasure now, dear friends, is mine,</div><div class="verse"> -To show you one more valentine.</div><div class="verse"> -This is my dear sweet valentine,</div><div class="verse"> -Sent to us from 'Ye olden time.'"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -<span style="margin-left: 2em;">GIRL DRESSED IN OLD-FASHIONED COSTUME:</span></div><div class="verse"> -"I am an old-fashioned dame,</div><div class="verse"> -But I love you just the same."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -CUPID: "And I am an Esperanto valentine,</div><div class="verse"> -For me dear friends, you all should pine.</div><div class="verse"> -Karulin' mi amas vin,</div><div class="verse"> -Chu vi amas, amas min?</div><div class="verse"> -Kaj nun mi deziras vin</div><div class="verse"> -Estu mia valentin'!"</div> -</div> -</div></div> -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_33">[33]</span></p> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="center"><span id="plate_4">Plate 4</span></p> -<div class="bbox2"> -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="plate_032-4_years_age" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/plate_032-4-years-age.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[AUTHOR AT FOUR YEARS OLD]</p> -</div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image033" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image033.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_34">[34]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Universal_Peace"><span class="font1 large">Universal Peace</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Mr. Charles Randall, Seattle, Washington, (Mia Onklo -Karlo.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image034" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image034.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[ <span class="smcap">No EATA You—No. Me Know</span> ESPERANTO...<span class="smcap">Knecht</span>]</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Not long ago, Sir Wu Ting Fang,</div><div class="verse"> -A song of peace most sweetly sang,</div><div class="verse"> -Suggesting that the Pension Millions,</div><div class="verse"> -Given yearly will be billions</div><div class="verse"> -Unless all wars be made to cease</div><div class="verse"> -By a Tribunal ruled by "PEACE."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But good Sir Fang he did not go</div><div class="verse"> -Far off to Hague or else he'd know</div><div class="verse"> -That Peace Tribunals bring not "PEACE,"</div><div class="verse"> -Nor cause all bloody wars to cease;</div><div class="verse"> -As every man from each strange land</div><div class="verse"> -All other men can't understand</div><div class="verse"> -E'en when the learned GO-BETWEEN</div><div class="verse"> -Tries to explain and makes a scene.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Of mighty sword and mightier pen</div><div class="verse"> -Poets have sung time and again,</div><div class="verse"> -But they forgot in songs they sung</div><div class="verse"> -To praise the power of a COMMON TONGUE,</div><div class="verse"> -And ne'er will banners of PEACE be unfurled</div><div class="verse"> -'Till ESPERANTO rules over the world.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_35">[35]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="All_The_World_Cries"><span class="font1 large">All The World Cries</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Katherine Wellman, Evansville, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image035a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image035a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Quack-quack-quack-quack!" cries Auntie Duck,</div><div class="verse"> -While Mother Hen goes "Cluck-cluck-cluck!"</div><div class="verse"> -And Papa Dog cries, "Bowwow-wow,"</div><div class="verse"> -And Sister Cat, "Me-ow, me-ow!"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Eek-eek- eek- eek!" squeals Grandma Pig,</div><div class="verse"> -I'm growing, oh, so fat and big;"</div><div class="verse"> -While "Cackle-cackle" all the day,</div><div class="verse"> -The little goslings like to say.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Proud Grandpa Turkey struts along</div><div class="verse"> -With his eternal gobble-song:</div><div class="verse"> -Sir Horse he whinnies, "Hee-hee-hee!"</div><div class="verse"> -And "buzzey-buzzey" goes Miss Bee.</div><div class="verse"> -Sis Maud, the Mule, cries "Hee-hee-haw!"</div><div class="verse"> -And Missy Crow goes "Caw-caw-caw!"</div><div class="verse"> -Good Madam Cow cries, "Moo-moo-moo!"</div><div class="verse"> -And gentle Doves they "Coo-coo-coo!"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"><div class="verse"> -The Baby Lambs cry, "Baa-baa-baa!"</div><div class="verse"> -And little Kids squeal, "Ma-ma-ma!"</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image035b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image035b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Could_Only_Ask_Questions"><span class="font1 large">Could Only Ask Questions</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Miss Edna Speck, Evansville, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Madelaine," asked her mother, when home she came at noon,</div><div class="verse"> -"How did you like your teacher, or can't you tell so soon?"</div><div class="verse"> -MADELAINE.</div> -<div class="verse"> -"Oh, yes, I formed my 'pinion long 'fore I started home,</div><div class="verse"> -She's rather pleasant, looks quite wise, and wears a lovely comb,</div><div class="verse"> -But surely she is stupid in spite of her wise looks,</div><div class="verse"> -'Cause she only asked us questions from out a lot of books.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_36">[36]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Let_The_Bumble_Be"><span class="font1 large">Let The Bumble Be</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Cousin Virginia Rehn.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image036" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image036.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[ STUNG]...<span class="smcap">Knecht</span></p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -One day I saw a bumble bee bumbling on a rose,</div><div class="verse"> -And as I stood admiring him he stung me on the nose.</div><div class="verse"> -My nose in pain, it swelled so large it looked like a potato,</div><div class="verse"> -So Daddy said, though Mother thought 'twas more like a tomato.</div><div class="verse"> -And now dear children this advice I hope you'll take from me,</div><div class="verse"> -And when you see a bumble bee just let that bumble be.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_37">[37]</span></p> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Take_That_Gum_From_Your_Mouth_And_Put_Your_Feet_In"><span class="font1 large">Take That Gum From Your Mouth And Put Your Feet In</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Cousin Pauline Sackville.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image037a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image037a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Young Susie was quite noted for having great large feet,</div><div class="verse"> -And for working both her jaws, this maid could not be beat.</div><div class="verse"> -Her wad of gum she always bore with her unto the school,</div><div class="verse"> -Though well she knew she might be spanked, for 'twas against the rule,</div><div class="verse"> -But skillfully she hid this gum, did naughty little Sue,</div><div class="verse"> -Though oft' behind her little book she took a little chew,</div><div class="verse"> -But once when she was building up a castle in the air,</div><div class="verse"> -And thought she was a lady rich and most entrancing fair,</div><div class="verse"> -While stretching out her legs and feet into the narrow aisle</div><div class="verse"> -And thinking of sweet Bobby Jones, the maid began to smile.</div><div class="verse"> -Then suddenly the teacher cried, above the school room's din,</div><div class="verse"> -"Take that gum from out your mouth and put your feet right in."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image037b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image037b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="The_Tersest_Bathing_Suit"><span class="font1 large">The Tersest Bathing Suit</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">This story was told to the author by Mr. Marshall White, Evansville, -Ind.</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When to the seashore Robert went, with Ma and Sister Nell,</div><div class="verse"> -He met a wise professor, who soon taught him to spell,</div><div class="verse"> -Likewise to read of fairy lore and use a real steel pen</div><div class="verse"> -To write to his own father dear, who like most all the men</div><div class="verse"> -Must ever stay at home and work to earn the cents to pay</div><div class="verse"> -For wife and children's outing 'till the summer slips away.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Now all the strange, uncommon words which little Bob could find,</div><div class="verse"> -He stored away and tried to keep in his small, active mind</div><div class="verse"> -So as to use in writing notes to his dear fat old Dad,</div><div class="verse"> -And when the big folks used strange words it made him very glad.</div><div class="verse"> -So one day when of something TERSE he heard his sister tell,</div><div class="verse"> -He asked her for its meaning and he thus rewarded Nell</div><div class="verse"> -By writing to his father, dear, "Oh, Daddy, you should see</div><div class="verse"> -Nell's awful TERSEST bathing suit, which won't reach to her knee."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_38">[38]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Furs_Lined_With_Kittens"><span class="font1 large">Furs Lined With Kittens</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Adaline Sherman, Wheeling. W. Va.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image038a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image038a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Said a rich little girl, who was boasting one day,</div><div class="verse"> -"I'ze too many furs, so I throws dem away,"</div><div class="verse"> -But her poor little friend, who fine furs had none,</div><div class="verse"> -In braggadocia could not be outdone,</div><div class="verse"> -And proudly she showed her little fur mittens</div><div class="verse"> -And said, "I'ze sum odders, do deys lined wid kittens."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image038b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image038b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Boys_Description_Of_A_Goat"><span class="font1 large">A Boy's Description Of A Goat</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Cousin James Diller.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When the teacher asked young Leo to write a little rhyme</div><div class="verse"> -Describing some strange animal he'd seen at any time,</div><div class="verse"> -He seized his long slate pencil and this is what he wrote</div><div class="verse"> -About the common animal, which children call a goat:</div><div class="verse"> -A goat is stronger than a pig,</div><div class="verse"> -But often it is not as big.</div><div class="verse"> -It has four legs just like a horse,</div><div class="verse"> -But never runs on a race-course.</div><div class="verse"> -It gives good milk, though not as much</div><div class="verse"> -As cows and elephants and such,</div><div class="verse"> -But more than any bull or ox,</div><div class="verse"> -Rooster, ram, or sly old fox.</div><div class="verse"> -Like any mule a goat likes hay</div><div class="verse"> -And all tin cans we throw away.</div><div class="verse"> -He's useful and I'm fond of him,</div><div class="verse"> -But some good folks have a strange whim</div><div class="verse"> -To hold their noses when he's near,</div><div class="verse"> -And act as if they greatly fear</div><div class="verse"> -To touch his fur which has the smell</div><div class="verse"> -Of something I know very well.</div><div class="verse"> -The odor I'd know anywhere,</div><div class="verse"> -It's like Dad's tonic for his hair.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_39">[39]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Riddle"><span class="font1 large">A Riddle</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Miss Mame Leo, Erie, Pa.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image039a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image039a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -One night 'neath the light of a silvery moon</div><div class="verse"> -There sat on a log pile a very fat coon</div><div class="verse"> -And also a little most cunning brown fellow</div><div class="verse"> -Eating of melon so juicy and mellow.</div><div class="verse"> -The large robust coon and the wee little one</div><div class="verse"> -Thought they were having a bushel of fun,</div><div class="verse"> -And laughed very loudly in notes of pure glee,</div><div class="verse"> -For they were as happy as happy could be.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -So here is a riddle I'll give now to you,</div><div class="verse"> -Guess the relations there was 'twixt the two.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -<span class="i-2">ANSWER.</span></div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Most everyone answers, "Why, father and son."</div><div class="verse"> -Not so—'twas a Mammy and her little one.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image039b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image039b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Grandpas_Head_Cums_Frew_His_Hair"><span class="font1 large">Grandpa's Head Cums Frew His Hair</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Margaret Ruston, Evansville, Ind., and Mr. Wm. Warren -Newburg, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When Margaret was a youngster scarcely two years old,</div><div class="verse"> -At climbing chairs and tables this lass was very bold,</div><div class="verse"> -And one day when her grandpa was seated in his chair</div><div class="verse"> -She climbed upon the rounded rungs as if they were a stair,</div><div class="verse"> -And looking at her Grandpa's head, which fast was growing bald,</div><div class="verse"> -She cried out, "Dearest Grandpa, one time you must hab failed,</div><div class="verse"> -Or maybe you've been naughty and dot an awful scare,</div><div class="verse"> -Which taused de top ob yu's round head to tum right frew de hair."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_40">[40]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Susan_Rewarded_For_Twenty_Years_Service"><span class="font1 large">Susan Rewarded For Twenty Year's Service</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Dr. and Mrs. W. Baker, Terre Haute, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image040" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image040.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Professor Theophilus Socrates Snook,</div><div class="verse"> -One day paid a visit to Susan, his cook,</div><div class="verse"> -And beaming upon her with kindliest look</div><div class="verse"> -Said, "Susan, my dear, please gaze at tins book.</div><div class="verse"> -In here you may learn of elephantiasis,</div><div class="verse"> -And also the hookworm, uncinariasis;</div><div class="verse"> -Of craw-craw and chiggers, of ainhum and sprue,</div><div class="verse"> -And all that I've written about them is true.</div><div class="verse"> -Now, Susan, to me you've been faithful, my dear,</div><div class="verse"> -In keeping my house for many a year;</div><div class="verse"> -For years nearly twenty you've been now with me,</div><div class="verse"> -Cooking my victuals just as they should be,</div><div class="verse"> -And truly I think a reward I should pay</div><div class="verse"> -To one who has labored from day unto day.</div><div class="verse"> -So when I discovered a wondrous new germ,</div><div class="verse"> -Which causes young children to wiggle and squirm,</div><div class="verse"> -I thought that this bug for you I would name</div><div class="verse"> -And bring you great glory and honor and fame.</div><div class="verse"> -It's a wondrous discovery, this ungomariasis,</div><div class="verse"> -And so we will call it the SUSANBONPIASIS."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"No, thank you, your honor," said Susan Bawben,</div><div class="verse"> -"I had the bugs once and don't want 'em again,</div><div class="verse"> -And if you onsist upon callin' me BUGS,</div><div class="verse"> -I'll lave you alone wid your books and your drugs."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="center"><span id="plate_5">Plate 5</span></p> -<div class="bbox2"> -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="plate_040-5_years_age" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/plate_040-5-years-age.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[AUTHOR AT FIVE YEARS OLD]</p> -</div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_41">[41]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Bridget_Makes_Split_Pea_Soup"><span class="font1 large">Bridget Makes Split Pea Soup</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Lieutenant and Mrs. Arthur Crenshaw, U. S. N.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image041a" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image041a.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Bridget," asked the mistress, "whatever is the matter,</div><div class="verse"> -Nothing ready for our Lunch excepting pancake batter?</div><div class="verse"> -Why, I invited guests to come for lunch at half past one</div><div class="verse"> -And they've been waiting all this time and yet there's nothing done."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Well, mum," replied Miss Bridget, "the fault is all your own,</div><div class="verse"> -For split pea soup you ordered and workin' here alone,</div><div class="verse"> -It's took me most two hours while tryin' just to split</div><div class="verse"> -Three hundred of these blarsted peas, which give me most a fit,</div><div class="verse"> -And as there's still three hundred, 'twill take two hours more</div><div class="verse"> -To split the pesky little things, shure as me name's MAHORE!"</div> -</div></div></div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image041b" style="max-width: 18.75em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image041b.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Lazy_White_Men_Sit_While_Flying_Through_The_Air"><span class="font1 large">Lazy White Men Sit While Flying Through The Air</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image041c" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image041c.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Poor Lo, the Indian, disrespects his brothers wise and fair,</div><div class="verse"> -Who now on aeroplanes are wont to make trips through the air.</div><div class="verse"> -He watches them go circling like birds up in the skies,</div><div class="verse"> -Then grunts, "Heap lazy white man, he sits down when he flies."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_42">[42]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="To_Save_Him_From_A_Whipping"><span class="font1 large">To Save Him From A Whipping</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Howard Roosa, Evansville, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image042" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image042.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When Mrs. Hall, who had spent the day</div><div class="verse"> -With Mrs. Greene, was going away,</div><div class="verse"> -Wee curly headed naughty Joe</div><div class="verse"> -Begged so hard that she wouldn't go.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Now all the day this roguish lad</div><div class="verse"> -Had disobeyed and been quite bad,</div><div class="verse"> -So Mrs. Hall, in great surprise,</div><div class="verse"> -Paused and looked in his brown eyes,</div><div class="verse"> -While saying, "I'm so glad to know</div><div class="verse"> -You love me truly, dearest Joe."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Oh, 'tisent that," said honest Joe,</div><div class="verse"> -"I wouldn't mind for you to go</div><div class="verse"> -Except my mother said to-day,</div><div class="verse"> -She'd whip me when you went away."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_43">[43]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Skillet_In_Society_Alias_A_Chafing_Dish"><span class="font1 large">A Skillet In Society (Alias A Chafing Dish)</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Mrs. Katherine Brown, Indianapolis, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image043" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image043.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -I heard my mother, just to-day, asking dear old dad,</div><div class="verse"> -To buy her a nice chafing-dish and make her very glad;</div><div class="verse"> -Though he declared its cooking was a waste of alcohol,</div><div class="verse"> -Causing indigestion and perhaps a doctor's call.</div><div class="verse"> -I inner saw a chafing-dish and so I longed to know</div><div class="verse"> -How it looked and what 'twas for and so and so and so;</div><div class="verse"> -But mother would not answer and daddy went away,</div><div class="verse"> -So I sought the kitchen, where Bridget holds her sway,</div><div class="verse"> -And asked her if she ever saw, since she began to cook,</div><div class="verse"> -A chafing-dish on pantry shelf or pictured in a book?</div><div class="verse"> -Then Bridget turned her pug nose up with a "contempshus" air,</div><div class="verse"> -And gave a twist to her small knot of brick dust colored hair,</div><div class="verse"> -And said, "A chafing-dish, my dear, so says Miss B. Moriety,</div><div class="verse"> -Is but a common skillet pan that's got in High Society."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_44">[44]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Autos_Change_Good_Luck"><span class="font1 large">Autos Change Good Luck</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Uncle Cicero Stoner.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image044" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image044.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Poor Uncle Zeke, he's very sad, and says the whole world's wrong,</div><div class="verse"> -For when he was a little boy it was a common song,</div><div class="verse"> -To sing about the luck which came from finding a horse shoe,</div><div class="verse"> -And in those good old lucky days the sign was always true.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But Sunday when poor Uncle Zeke was walking on the street,</div><div class="verse"> -He saw a lucky horseshoe which was lying at his feet,</div><div class="verse"> -And as he stooped to seize the prize which lay before him there,</div><div class="verse"> -Along an automobile came and whizzed him in the air.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -To-day I saw him lying still and pale upon his couch,</div><div class="verse"> -And oh, my goodness gracious, but he had an awful grouch!</div><div class="verse"> -His hands and arms in bandages were tied securely up,</div><div class="verse"> -And on his forehead was a bump like Aunt Mariah's cup.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -He told me I should listen well and take his counsel sage,</div><div class="verse"> -And never try to get good luck in this fierce auto age,</div><div class="verse"> -By picking up a horse's shoe in street or country road</div><div class="verse"> -No more than I would stoop to seize a common green back toad.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_45">[45]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_Boy_Who_Was_Hero_And_villian"><span class="font1 large">A Boy Who Was Hero And villian</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Uncle Ernest, Sackville.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image045" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image045.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="stanza"> -One day in a big meeting held by a MERCY-BAND,</div><div class="verse"> -The leader asked each little boy to hold up his right hand</div><div class="verse"> -If he could tell of any deed of kindness he had done</div><div class="verse"> -In saving some poor animal or helping any one.</div><div class="verse"> -Then Ernest held his hand on high and pride suffused his face,</div><div class="verse"> -As from his seat he quickly rose and took the speaker's place,</div><div class="verse"> -While speaking loud in accents clear, "I saved a little pup</div><div class="verse"> -Who had his tail in a tin can all tied securely up.</div><div class="verse"> -I took the can from off his tail and made him bark with joy,</div><div class="verse"> -So mother said and so said dad—I was a darling boy."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"And so say I," the leader said, while calling him her "DEAR,"</div><div class="verse"> -"But how I wish the wicked boy who did the deed was here."</div> -ERNEST.</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Well, here he is, for I'm the boy who did that deed as well,</div><div class="verse"> -So I could take the tin can off and of my goodness tell."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_46">[46]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Wise_Ignatius_Escapes_A_Whipping"><span class="font1 large">Wise Ignatius Escapes A Whipping</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Edgar and Melville Garvin, Evansville, Ind.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image046" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image046.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Father," said learned Ignatius, as the strap was preparing to fall</div><div class="verse"> -Down on his trouserless bare-skin, "I don't mind a whipping at all,</div><div class="verse"> -But are you quite certain, dear father, the strap has been well sterilized</div><div class="verse"> -For virulent germs in old leather are often concealed and disguised;</div><div class="verse"> -And surely by violent impact with textile and soft porous skin,</div><div class="verse"> -But lately exposed to the street's dust there's danger of entering in</div><div class="verse"> -Upon my most delicate system, and then comes the big doctor's fee,</div><div class="verse"> -So dear father show you're a wise man and touch not that strap upon me."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -While the learned youth plead, lo! his father upon that dread strap loosed his hold,</div><div class="verse"> -And thus he escaped from a whipping, Ignatius, the wise and the bold.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_47">[47]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Nervous_Jelly"><span class="font1 large">Nervous Jelly</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Charles Donnelly, Evansville, Ind.)</p> -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image047" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image047.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -One day when there was company, wee greedy Lillie May,</div><div class="verse"> -Took the jelly nearly all when it was passed her way;</div><div class="verse"> -And in great haste she ate it up with her small silver spoon,</div><div class="verse"> -But oh, alas, the Piggiewig! she was discovered soon</div><div class="verse"> -By mother, who was greatly shocked to see her naughty elf</div><div class="verse"> -Eating like a greedy boy from off the kitchen shelf.</div><div class="verse"> -But mother couldn't scold aloud for fear the guest would hear,</div><div class="verse"> -And so she softly whispered, "Don't eat that way, my dear."</div><div class="verse"> -Then Mrs. Dean, the company, she patted Lillie's head,</div><div class="verse"> -And smiling at the jellied face, she to the culprit said,</div><div class="verse"> -"I've always liked the jelly good which makes my bread so sweet,</div><div class="verse"> -And surely it tastes better still when with a spoon we eat</div><div class="verse"> -This lovely, wobbling dainty, which is loved by one and all,</div><div class="verse"> -From little girls and tiny boys to great men, large and tall."</div><div class="verse"> -This speech encouraged Lillie May, who nodded her wise head</div><div class="verse"> -And said, "Besides dis jelly is too nervous for to spread."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_48">[48]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="One_Johnson_More_One_Smith_Less"><span class="font1 large">One Johnson More, One Smith Less</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Salibelle Royster, Smith's Mills, Kentucky.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image048" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image048.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -When Zekiel Rastus Johnson had the courage to propose</div><div class="verse"> -To lovely Miss Amanda Smith, she turned up her flat nose</div><div class="verse"> -And said, "Now Rastus Johnson, how dare you ask of me</div><div class="verse"> -To change my 'ristocratic name and Mrs. Johnson be,</div><div class="verse"> -When now in the directory, the Johnsons are ahead</div><div class="verse"> -Of our most noted family, so 'course I would not wed</div><div class="verse"> -With you to make one Johnson more to swell the Johnson line,</div><div class="verse"> -While Smiths in number take back seats where they can never shine."</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p class="center"><span id="plate_6">Plate 6</span></p> -<div class="bbox2"> -<div class="figcenter illowp50" id="plate_048-6_years_age" style="max-width: 25em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/plate_048-6-years-age.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<p class="caption center">[AUTHOR AT SIX YEARS OLD]</p> -</div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_49">[49]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Pride"><span class="font1 large">Pride</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for St. Nicholas, June, 1909.)</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image049" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image049.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -The Bible says that pride's the cause of people falling down,</div><div class="verse"> -And an example of this truth I once saw in our town,</div><div class="verse"> -When we were driving on the street and watching passers-by,</div><div class="verse"> -From out a store stepped a fine dude, all dressed in silk hat high,</div><div class="verse"> -And pants so tight he could not take a single manly stride,</div><div class="verse"> -His moustache curled and round his neck a ribbon pink and wide,</div><div class="verse"> -While in his hand a gold head cane, which he twirled round and round,</div><div class="verse"> -So that the people all would know a great man was in town;</div><div class="verse"> -But being filled with pride of self he did not know his heel</div><div class="verse"> -Had come in contact with a part of a banana peel</div><div class="verse"> -Until it felled him to the earth and smashed his silk hat's crown</div><div class="verse"> -And even then he did not know 'twas PRIDE that knocked him down.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_50">[50]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Job_Smarter_Than_Modern_Babies"><span class="font1 large">Job Smarter Than Modern Babies</span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image050" style="max-width: 37.5em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image050.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Mother," said Lida, "why can't brother speak,</div><div class="verse"> -Is he so stupid or only just weak,</div><div class="verse"> -Like poor ancient Grandma, when she has a cold,</div><div class="verse"> -And loses her voice so she can't even scold?"</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"No, darling," said mother, "your brother can't talk,</div><div class="verse"> -Eat sugar candy, nor even yet walk,</div><div class="verse"> -As he is a baby the size of your doll,</div><div class="verse"> -And babies can't talk when they are so small."</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -"Then, mother," said Lida, "the kids nowadays</div><div class="verse"> -Are not half so smart in all of their ways</div><div class="verse"> -As babies who lived in the long, long ago,</div><div class="verse"> -For dear teacher told me (so 'course it is so,)</div><div class="verse"> -That Job in the Bible cursed the day he was born,</div><div class="verse"> -I 'spose like big Tom, when he can't play his horn."</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_51">[51]</span></p> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Only_Naughty_Children_See_Spooks"><span class="font1 large">Only Naughty Children See "Spooks" -On Hallow'een</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(Written for Aunt Winifred Broad,<br /> -Stockleigh Pomeroy, England.)</p> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Witches and goblins, spooks and elves,</div><div class="verse"> -With sprites and gnomes from elf-land delves,</div><div class="verse"> -To-night are flying here and there,</div><div class="verse"> -Yes, up and down and everywhere.</div><div class="verse"> -For this one night in all the year,</div><div class="verse"> -They rule the earth and bring great fear</div><div class="verse"> -To all the naughty little boys</div><div class="verse"> -Who tease good girls and break their toys.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -These spooks they also make girls sad</div><div class="verse"> -When they are selfish, cross and bad;</div><div class="verse"> -So when it's dark, bad boys and maids</div><div class="verse"> -They see these awful fearsome shades,</div><div class="verse"> -And that is why with covered heads,</div><div class="verse"> -They trembling lie in their warm beds.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But even there, they goblins see,</div><div class="verse"> -Spooks, and gnomes and all that be</div><div class="verse"> -Abroad upon weird Hallow'een,</div><div class="verse"> -When all the wizards may be seen</div><div class="verse"> -By naughty kids and grown up folks,</div><div class="verse"> -Who like to play most wicked jokes.</div> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -But good young girls and gentle boys,</div><div class="verse"> -The kids who are their mothers' joys,</div><div class="verse"> -They like the dark just as the light,</div><div class="verse"> -For spooks ne'er come within their sight,</div><div class="verse"> -And in their dreams the lovely elves</div> -Show them bright scenes from fairy delves.</div><div class="verse"> -</div> -<div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -So, if to-night you are afraid</div><div class="verse"> -Of any spook or any shade,</div><div class="verse"> -We'll know you are a naughty child,</div><div class="verse"> -So cross and willful, rude and wild.</div> -</div></div></div> - -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> - -<div class="chapter"> -<p><span class="pagenum" id="Page_52">[52]</span></p> - -<h2 class="nobreak" id="Six_Year_Old_Girl_Writes_Poem_Hoping_To_Save_Forest_Trees"><span class="font1 large">Six Year Old Girl Writes Poem Hoping To Save Forest Trees</span></h2> -</div> - -<p class="cb">(From "The Woman's National Daily.")</p> - -<p>The following rhyme was written by a little 6-year-old-girl in hopes -to save a beautiful forest near Evansville, Ind., and to help the Children's -Outing Farm. A short account of the little girl's work as an -Esperantist appeared in a recent issue of The National Daily and a number -of articles concerning her abilities as a linguist have appeared in -other publications.</p> - -<p>She is the youngest child in the world holding a diploma from Dr. -Zamenhof for being able to read, write and speak in Esperanto, and she -also speaks French as well as English.</p> - -<p>This little girl, who was born in Norfolk, Va., has been a lover of -books since her babyhood days. She knew Mother Goose by heart when -but 1 year of age and learned to read when but 2. At 4 she read Lamb's -Tales of Shakespeare and had finished the fifth reader. A few months -ago she was sent to school, but could not be graded, as she could read, -write and spell anything, but knew nothing of arithmetic. The noted -mathematician, Mrs. Hornbrook, of Chicago, having met the little girl -at Chautauqua, N. Y., and knowing of her mental powers, asked to instruct -her in this branch, and she soon taught her the rudiments of arithmetic.</p> - -<p>She is the daughter of Dr. J. B. Stoner, Surgeon in the Public -Health and Marine Hospital Service, and Winifred Sackville Stoner, -President of the Woman's Esperanto League.</p> - -<div class="figcenter illowp100" id="image052" style="max-width: 25.4375em;"> - <img class="w100" src="images/image052.jpg" alt="" /> -</div> - -<div class="chapter"> -<h2 class="nobreak" id="An_Appeal_To_The_Fairies"><span class="font1 large"><span class="font1 large">An Appeal To The Fairies</span></span></h2> -</div> - -<div class="poetry"><div class="poem"><div class="stanza"> -<div class="verse"> -Good Fairies, save the lovely trees which live on Coal Mine Hill!<br /> -Their home has been your home so long, your hearts with grief wou</div><div class="verse"> -Should stout men armed with axes come and fell them to the earth,</div><div class="verse"> -These monarchs of the forest, these jewels of great worth.</div><div class="verse"> -The giant oaks and stately elms, the rulers of this wood,</div><div class="verse"> -Have watched the growth of Evansville and helped it as they could.</div><div class="verse"> -They gave their shade and soft bright leaves to make a downy nest</div><div class="verse"> -To shelter the first baby boy that Evansville possessed.</div><div class="verse"> -Before this city had a church in which both bad and good</div><div class="verse"> -Could ask forgiveness of the Lord, they worshipped in this wood;</div><div class="verse"> -And those who love the beautiful and lovely scenes to see,</div><div class="verse"> -They climb upon this grassy hill and stand beneath some tree,</div><div class="verse"> -While gazing far as eye can reach to fair Kentucky's lands,</div><div class="verse"> -Or looking at the river shore on which our city stands.</div><div class="verse"> -Above their heads the bright blue sky, green grass beneath their feet,</div><div class="verse"> -And all around a lovely scene such as we seldom meet;</div><div class="verse"> -Green pastures with cows grazing, broad river flowing by,</div><div class="verse"> -And many tall church spires lifted toward the sky.</div><div class="verse"> -No fitter place for children nor grown-up folks could be</div><div class="verse"> -Than on this lovely Coal Mine Hill where Nature we may see.</div><div class="verse"> -'Tis here the little orphans and poor children all around</div><div class="verse"> -Find the greatest pleasures which in this woods abound.</div><div class="verse"> -So, dearest, kindest Fairies, please rescue these grand trees,</div><div class="verse"> -And save them for the children—we ask you on our knees.</div> -</div></div></div> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> -<p class="center">THE END</p> -<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" /> -<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK JINGLES ***</div> -<div style='text-align:left'> - -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will -be renamed. -</div> - -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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