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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Romance of an Old Fool, by Roswell Field
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Romance of an Old Fool
+
+Author: Roswell Field
+
+Release Date: February 24, 2007 [EBook #20661]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE ROMANCE OF AN OLD FOOL ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Audrey Longhurst, Suzan Flanagan and the Online
+Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
+
+
+
+
+
+--------------------------------------------------
+
+_The_ ROMANCE OF
+   AN OLD FOOL
+
+--------------------------------------------------
+
+ THE ROMANCE
+
+      OF
+
+ AN OLD FOOL
+
+
+      BY
+
+ ROSWELL FIELD
+
+
+   EVANSTON
+WILLIAM S. LORD
+     1902
+
+--------------------------------------------------
+
+_Copyright, 1902, by_
+    ROSWELL FIELD
+
+
+UNIVERSITY PRESS . JOHN WILSON
+ AND SON . CAMBRIDGE, U.S.A.
+
+--------------------------------------------------
+
+                      _To_
+                 MY GODCHILDREN
+
+_With the somewhat unnecessary assurance that
+     it is not an autobiography, this little
+         tale of misconceived attachment
+                is affectionately
+                   inscribed_
+
+--------------------------------------------------
+
+
+
+
+THE ROMANCE _of_ AN OLD FOOL
+
+
+If it had not been for Bunsey, the novelist, I might have
+attained the heights. As a critic Bunsey has never commanded my
+highest admiration, and yet I have had my tender moments for him.
+From a really exacting standpoint he was not much of a novelist,
+and to his failure to win the wealth which is supposed to
+accompany fame I may have owed much of the debt of his sustained
+presence and his fondness for my tobacco. Bunsey had started out
+in life with high ideals, a resolution to lead the purely
+literary existence and to supply the market with a variety of
+choice, didactic essays along the line of high thinking; but the
+demand did not come up to the supply, and presently he abandoned
+his original lofty intention in favor of a sort of dubious
+romance. The financial returns, however, while a trifle more
+regular and encouraging, were not of sufficient importance to
+justify him in giving up his friendly claims on my house, my
+library, my time, my favorite lounge, and my best brand of
+cigars, in return for which he contributed philosophic opinions
+and much strenuous advice on topics in general and literature in
+particular.
+
+From my childhood I have been in the habit of keeping a diary, a
+running comment on the daily incidents of my pleasant but
+uneventful life, and occasionally, when Bunsey's society seemed
+too assertive and familiar, I sought to punish him by reading
+long and numerous excerpts. To do him justice he took the
+chastisement meekly, and even insisted that I was burying a
+remarkable talent, sometimes going to the magnanimous extreme of
+offering to introduce me to his publisher, and to speak a good
+word for me to the editors of certain magazines with whom he
+maintained a brisk correspondence, not infrequently of a
+querulous nature. All these friendly offices I gently put aside,
+in recalling the degradation of Bunsey's ideals, though I went on
+tolerating Bunsey, who had a good heart and an insistent manner.
+In this way I possibly deprived myself of a glorious career.
+
+My ability to befriend Bunsey was due to a felicitous chain of
+circumstances. When the late Mrs. Stanhope passed to her reward,
+she considerately left behind a document making me the recipient
+of her entire and not inconsiderable fortune. This proved a
+most unexpected blow to the church, which had enjoyed the honor
+and pleasure of Mrs. Stanhope's association, and which, quite
+naturally, had hoped to profit by her decease. The late Mrs.
+Stanhope, who I neglected to say was, in the eyes of Heaven,
+the world, and the law, my wife, had not lived with me in that
+utter abandonment to conjugal affection so much to be desired.
+We married to please our families, and we lived apart as much
+as possible to please ourselves. Though not without certain
+physical charms, Mrs. Stanhope was a woman of great moral
+rigidity and religious austerity, who saw life through the
+diminishing end of a sectarian telescope, and who cared far
+more for the distant heathen than for the local convivial pagans
+who composed my _entourage_. She had brought to me a considerable
+sum of money, which I had increased by judicious investments,
+and I dare say that it was in recognition of my business ability,
+as well as possibly in a moment of becoming wifely remorse, that
+she bequeathed to me her property intact. I gave her final
+testimonial services wholly in keeping with her standing as
+a church-woman, and I must say for my friends, whom she had
+severely ignored during her life, that they behaved very
+handsomely on that mournful occasion. They turned out in
+large numbers, and testified in other ways to their regard for
+her unblemished character. I recall, not without emotion after
+all these years, that Bunsey's memorial tribute to the church
+paper--for which he never received a dollar--was a model
+of appreciation as well as of Christian forgiveness and
+self-forgetfulness.
+
+The passing of Mrs. Stanhope made it possible for me to put into
+operation the long-desired plan of retiring a little way into the
+country, not too far from the seductions of the club and the
+city, but far enough to conform to the tastes of a country
+gentleman who likes to whistle to his dogs, putter over his
+roses, and meditate in a comfortable library with the poets and
+philosophers of his fancy. Here, with my good house-keeper,
+Prudence--a name I chose in preference to her mother's selection,
+Elizabeth--and my gardener and man of affairs, Malachy, I lived
+for a number of years at peace with the world and perfectly
+satisfied with myself. Although I was dangerously over forty, and
+my hair, which had been impressively dark, was conspicuously gray
+in spots, my figure was good, my dress correct, and my mirror
+told me that I was still in a position to be in the matrimonial
+running if I tried. I mention these trifling physical details
+merely to save my modesty the humiliation and annoyance of
+referring to them in future, and to prepossess the gentle reader
+wherever the sex makes it highly important.
+
+I do not deny that in certain moments of loneliness which come to
+us, widowers and bachelors alike, I had the impulse to tempt
+again the matrimonial fortune, and counting on my financial
+standing, together with other attractions, I ran over the
+eligible ladies of my acquaintance. But one was a little too old,
+and another was a good deal too flighty. One was too fond of
+society, and another did not like dogs. A fifth spoiled her
+chances by an unwomanly ignorance of horticulture, and a sixth
+perished miserably after returning to me one of my most cherished
+books with the leaves dog-eared and the binding cracked. For I
+hold with the greatest philosophers that she who maltreats a book
+will never make a good wife. And so the years slipped cosily and
+cheerily by, while I grew more contented with my environment and
+less envious of my married friends, and whenever temporary
+melancholy overtook me I moved into the club for a month, or
+slipped across the water, finding in the change of scene
+immediate relief from the monotony of widowerhood.
+
+In thus fortifying myself against the wiles of woman I was much
+abetted by my good Prudence, who never ceased her exhortations as
+to the sinister designs of her sex, and who had a ready word of
+discouragement for any possible candidate who might be in the
+line of succession. "I see that Rogers woman walkin' by the house
+to-day, Mr. John," she would begin, "and I see her turnin' her
+nose up at the new paint on the arbor." (I selected that color
+myself.) "It's queer how that woman does give herself airs,
+considerin' everybody knows she's been ready for ten years to
+take the fust man that asks her." Prudence knew that I had
+escorted the elderly Miss Rogers to the theatre only the week
+before, and had commented pleasantly on the elegance of her
+figure. But the slight put upon my eye for color was too much.
+Wily Prudence!
+
+Or a day or two after I had rendered an act of neighborly
+kindness to the bereaved Mrs. Stebbins she would say quite
+casually:
+
+"I don't want to utter one word agin the poor and afflicted, Mr.
+John, but when the Widder Stebbins hit Cleo with a broom to-day I
+own I b'iled over. I shouldn't tell you if it warn't my duty."
+
+Cleopatra was my favorite cocker spaniel, and any faint
+impression my fair neighbor may have made on my unguarded heart
+was immediately dispelled. Thus subtly and vigilantly my
+house-keeper kept the outer gates of the citadel, and shooed away
+a possible mistress as effectually as she dispersed the predatory
+hens from the garden patch.
+
+But with the younger generation of women, good Prudence was less
+cautious. Any maiden under the very early twenties she regarded
+fair material for my friendly offices, and frequently she visited
+me with expressions commendatory of good conduct.
+
+"I likes to see you with the children, Mr. John, bless 'em, sir.
+And they do all seem to be so fond of you. There's nothin' that
+keeps the heart so young and fresh as goin' with young people,
+just as nothin' ages a man so much as havin' a lot of widders and
+designin' old maids about. Of course," she added, with a return
+of her natural suspicion, "you are old enough to be father to the
+whole bunch, which keeps people from talkin'."
+
+Whether it was Prudence's approbation or my own inclination I
+cannot say, but it soon came about that I was on paternally
+familiar terms with the entire neighborhood of maidens of
+reasonably tender years, and a very important factor in young
+feminine councils. These artful creatures knew exactly when
+their favorite roses were in bloom, exactly when the cherries
+back of the house were ripe, exactly when it was time to go to
+town for another theatre party, to give a picnic up the river, or
+a small and informal dance in the parlors. I was expected to
+remember and observe all birthdays, to be a well-spring of
+benevolence at Christmas, and a free and never-failing florist at
+Easter. I was the recipient of all young griefs and troubles, and
+no girl ever committed herself unconditionally to the arms of her
+lover until she had talked the matter over with Uncle John. All
+this, to a good-looking man of--well, considerably over forty,
+was flattering, but no sinecure.
+
+One morning, in the late spring, it came over me unhappily that
+in a moment of fatal forgetfulness I had promised to be present
+that evening at a card-party--a promise exacted by the "Rogers
+woman," _persona non grata_ to Prudence. A card-party was to me
+in the category with battle and murder and sudden death, from
+which we all petition to be delivered in the book of common
+prayer--but how to be delivered? I could not be called suddenly
+to town, for I had already run that excuse to its full limit. I
+could not conveniently start for Europe on an hour's notice. The
+plea of sickness I dismissed as feminine and unworthy. And while
+I sat debating to what extreme I could tax my over-burdened
+conscience, Malachy appeared with the information that he had
+discovered unmistakable signs of cutworms in the rose-bushes, and
+that the local custodians of the trees were thundering against an
+impending epidemic of brown-tailed moth. Surely my path of duty
+led to the garden. But that card-party? No, let the cutworm work
+his will, and let the brown-tailed moth corrupt; I must take
+refuge in flight, however inglorious. It was then that the good
+angel, who never forsakes a well-meaning man, whispered to me
+that far back in a quiet corner of New England was the little
+village where I had passed my boyhood, which I had deserted for
+five and twenty years, but which still remembered me as "Johnny"
+Stanhope, thanks to the officious longevity of the editor of the
+county paper.
+
+The situation I explained briefly to Prudence and Malachy, and
+swore them into the conspiracy. I threw a few clothes into a
+small trunk, despatched a hypocritical note of regret to Miss
+Rogers, caught the noon train, and was soon beyond the danger
+line. Mrs. Lot, casting an apprehensive glance behind her, could
+not have dreaded more fearful consequences than I, looking back
+on the calamity I was evading. But as we went on and on into the
+cool, quiet country, and felt the soft air stealing down from the
+nearing mountains, I began to experience a lively sense of relief
+and pleasure, and to wonder why I had so long delayed a visit to
+my boyhood home.
+
+I am sorry for the man whose childhood knew only the roar and
+bustle and swiftly shifting scenes of the city. For him there is
+no return in after years, no illusion to be renewed, no joy of
+youth to be substantiated. His habitation has passed away or
+yielded to the inroads of commerce, his landmarks have vanished,
+and he is bewildered by the strange sights that time and trade
+have put upon his memories. But time has no terrors for the
+country-bred boy. The Almighty does not change the mountains and
+the rivers and the great rocks that fortify the scenery, and man
+is slow to push back into the far meadowlands and the hillsides,
+and destroy the simple, primitive life of the fathers.
+
+All of the joy that such a returning pilgrim might have I felt
+when I left the train at the junction, and, scorning the pony
+engine and combination car supplied in later years by the railway
+company as a tribute to progress, set out to walk the two miles
+to the village. Every foot of the country I had played over as a
+boy. Here was the field where Deacon Skinner did his "hayin'";
+just beyond the deacon raised his tobacco crop. That roof over
+there, which I once detected as the top of Jim Pomeroy's barn,
+reminded me of the day of the raisin', when I sprained my ankle
+and thereby saved myself a thrashing for running away. Here was
+Pickerel Pond, the scene of many miraculous draughts, and now I
+crossed Peach brook which babbled along under the road just as
+saucily and untiringly as if it had slept all these years and was
+just awaking to fresh life. A hundred rods up the brook was the
+Widow Parsons's farm, and I knew that if I went through the side
+gate, cut across the barnyard, and kept down to the left, I
+should find that same old stump on which Bill Howland sat the day
+he caught the biggest dace ever pulled out of the quiet pool.
+
+The sun was going down behind Si Thompson's planing mill as I
+stopped at the little red covered bridge that marked the boundary
+of the village. Silas had been dead for twenty years, but it
+seemed to me that it was only yesterday that I heard his nasal
+twang above the roar of the machinery: "Sa-ay, you fellers want
+to git out o' that!" The little bridge had lost much of its color
+and most of its impressiveness, for I remembered when to my
+boyish fancy it seemed a greater triumph of engineering than the
+Victoria bridge at Montreal. And the same old thrill went through
+me as I started to run--just as I did when a boy--and felt the
+planks loosen and creak under my feet. Here was a home-coming
+worth the while.
+
+Hank Pettigrew kept the village tavern. The memory of man, so far
+as I knew, ran not back to the time when Hank did not keep the
+tavern. So I was not in the least surprised, as I entered, to see
+the old man, with his chair tilted back against the wall, his
+knees on a level with his chin, and his eyes fixed on a chromo of
+"Muster Day," which had descended to him through successive
+generations. He did not move as I advanced, or manifest the
+slightest emotion of surprise, merely saying, "Hullo, Johnny,"
+as if he expected me to remark that mother had sent me over to
+see if he had any ice cream left over from dinner. It probably
+did not occur to Hank that I had been absent twenty-five years.
+If it had occurred to him, he would have considered such a
+trifling flight of time not worth mentioning.
+
+With the question of lodging and supper disposed of, and with the
+modest bribe of a cigar, which Hank furtively exchanged for a
+more accustomed brand of valley leaf, it was not difficult to
+loosen the old landlord's tongue and secure information of my
+playmates. What had become of Teddy Grover, the pride of our
+school on exhibition day? Could we ever forget the afternoon he
+stood up before the minister and the assembled population and
+roared "Marco Bozzaris" until we were sure the sultan was quaking
+in his seraglio? And how he thundered "Blaze with your serried
+columns, I will not bend the knee!" To our excited imaginations
+what dazzling triumphs the future held out for Teddy.
+
+"Yep; Ted's still a-beout. Three days in the week he drives stage
+coach over to Spicerville, and the rest o' the time he does odd
+jobs--sort o' tendin' round."
+
+And Sallie Cotton--black-eyed, curly-haired, mischievous little
+sprite, the agony of the teacher and the love and admiration of
+the boys! Who climbed trees, rattled to school in the butcher
+wagon, never knew a lesson, but was always leading lady in the
+school colloquies, and was surely destined to rise to eminence on
+the American stage if she did not break her neck tumbling out of
+old Skinner's walnut tree?
+
+"Oh, Sal; she married the Congregational minister down to
+Peterfield, and was 'lected president of the Temperance Union and
+secretary of the Endeavorers. Read a piece down at Fust Church
+last week on 'Breakin' Away from Old Standards,' illustratin' the
+alarmin' degen'racy of children nowadays."
+
+And George Hawley, our Achilles, our Samson, our ideal of
+everything manly and courageous! Strong as an ox and brave as a
+lion! Our champion in every form of athletic sports! Who looked
+with contempt on girls and disdained their maidenly advances! Who
+thought only of deeds of muscular prowess, and who seemed to
+carry the assurance of a force that would lead armies and subdue
+nations! What of George?
+
+"Wa-al, George was a-beout not long ago. Had your room for his
+samples. Travellin' for a house down in Boston, and comes here
+reg'lar. Women folks say his last line o' shirt waists war the
+best they ever see."
+
+Oh, the times that change, and change us! Alas, the fleeting
+years, good Posthumus, that work such havoc with our childhood
+dreams and hopes and aspirations!
+
+It was a relief, after the shattering of these idols, to leave
+the society of the communicative Mr. Pettigrew and wander into
+the moonlight. Save as adding beauty to the scenery, the moon
+was comparatively of no assistance, for so well was the little
+village stamped on my memory, and so little had it changed in the
+quarter of a century, that I could have walked blindfolded to any
+suggested point. Naturally I turned my steps toward the home of
+my youth, and as I drew near the old-fashioned, many-gabled
+house, with its settled, substantial air, austere yet inviting,
+its large yard with the huge elms, and the big lamp burning in
+the library or "sittin'-room," where I first dolefully studied
+the geography that told me of a world outside, it seemed to bend
+toward me rather frigidly as if to say reproachfully: "You sold
+me! you sold me!" True, dear old home; in my less prosperous days
+I was guilty of the crime of selling the house that faithfully
+sheltered my family for a hundred years. But have I not repented?
+And have I not returned to buy you back, and to make such further
+reparation as present conditions and true repentance demand? Is
+this less the pleasure than the duty of wealth?
+
+With what sensations of delight I walked softly about the
+grounds, taking note of every familiar tree and bush and stump. I
+could have sworn that not a twig, not a blade of grass, had been
+despoiled or had disappeared in the years that marked my absence.
+I paused reverently under the old willow tree and affectionately
+rubbed my legs, for from this tree my parents had cut the
+instruments of torture for purposes of castigation, and its name,
+the weeping willow, was always associated in my infant mind with
+the direct results of contact with my unwilling person. On a
+level with the top of the willow was the little attic room where
+I slept, and the more sweetly when the crickets chirped, or the
+summer rain beat upon the roof, and where the song of the birds
+in the morning is the happiest music God has given to the
+country. Back of the woodshed I found the remains of an old
+grindstone, perhaps the same heavy crank I had so often
+perspiringly and reluctantly turned. Indeed my reviving memories
+were rather too generously connected with the strenuousness and
+not the pleasures of youth, but I thought of the well-filled lot
+in the old burying-ground on the hillside, and of those lying
+there who had said: "My boy, I am doing this for your good." I
+doubted it at the time, but perhaps they were right. At all
+events the memories were growing pleasanter, for a stretch of
+thirty-five years has many healing qualities, and our childhood
+griefs are such little things in the afterglow.
+
+In the early morning I renewed my rambles, going first to the
+little frame school-house, the old church with its tall spire,
+the saw-mill, the deacon's cider press, the swimming pool, and a
+dozen other places of boyish adventure and misadventure. Your
+true sentimentalist invariably gives the preference to scenes
+over persons, and is so often rewarded by the fidelity with which
+they respond to his eager expectations. It was not until I had
+exhausted every incident of the place that I sought out the
+companions of my school-days. What strange irony of fate is that
+which sends some of us out into the restless world to grow away
+from our old ideals and make others, and restrains some in the
+monotonous rut of village life, to drone peacefully their little
+span! But happy he, who, knowing nothing, misses nothing. If
+there were any village Hampdens, or mute, inglorious Miltons
+among my playmates, they gave no present indications. I found the
+girls considerably older than I expected, the boys less
+interesting than I hoped; but they all welcomed me with that
+grave, unemotional hospitality of the village, and we talked, far
+into the shadows, of our schooltime, the day that is never dead
+while memory endures.
+
+And so it came about that at the close of day I found myself
+standing at the garden gate of the Eastmann cottage. Peleg
+Eastmann had been our village postmaster, a grave, shy man, who
+had received the federal office because the thrifty neighbors
+agreed, irrespective of political feeling, that it was much less
+expensive to give him the office than to support him and his two
+daughters, the prettiest girls in our school. For they further
+agreed that Peleg was a "shif'less sort o' critter" and never
+could make a living, though he was a model postmaster and an
+excellent citizen and neighbor. Hence, when it came Peleg's turn
+to make the journey to the burying-ground in the village hearse,
+the whole community of Meadowvale was scandalized by the
+discovery that he had left his girls a comfortable little
+fortune, enough to keep them in modest wealth. Meadowvale never
+recovered from this shock. It felt that it had been victimized,
+and that its tenderest sensibility had been violated, and when
+his disconsolate daughters put up the granite shaft to their
+father's memory, relating that he had been faithful and just, the
+indignant political leader of the village remarked that it was
+"profanation of Scriptur'."
+
+Thirty years ago I had stood at this little gate with one of the
+Eastmann girls, escorting her home from Stella Perkins's party. I
+had attempted to kiss her good-night, and she had boxed my ears,
+thus contributing a disagreeable finale to an otherwise pleasant
+evening. Time is a great healer and I cherished no resentment at
+this late day toward the repudiator of my caresses. In fact I
+smiled in recollection of the incident as I walked up the
+gravelled path and knocked at the door. I wondered if the same
+vivacious, rosy-cheeked girl would come to meet me, and if I
+should feel in duty bound to make honorable amends. The door was
+opened by a tall, spare woman, who carried a lamp. The light
+reflected directly on her features, showed a face that in any
+other part of the world would be called hard; in New England it
+is merely resolute. It was the face of a woman fifty years of
+age, with massive chin, slightly sunken cheeks, a prominent nose,
+heavy eyebrows, and a high forehead rather scantily streaked by
+gray hair. There was no trace of the girlish bloom I had known,
+of the beauty that once had been hers, but the imperious manner
+of the woman was unmistakable.
+
+"Mary," I began jocularly, "I have come to apologize."
+
+She thrust the lamp forward, peered into my face, and said, with
+not the faintest trace of a smile or the slightest evidence of
+embarrassment:
+
+"Why, that's all right, Johnny Stanhope. I accept your apology.
+Come right in."
+
+I went in. We sat in the sitting-room and talked of our
+school-days and our fortunes. I told her how I had gone down to
+the city, how I had prospered, of my adventures in the world, of
+my marriage--dealing very gently with my relations with the late
+Mrs. Stanhope--of my bereavement and present idyllic existence.
+And she told me of herself, how she had lived on and on in the
+little cottage, caring only for the support and education of her
+niece, Phyllis Kinglake, an orphan for nearly twenty years. "You
+remember Sylvia?" she said, with the first touch of emotion.
+
+Did I remember Sylvia? My little fair-haired playmate with the
+large eyes and the blue veins showing through the delicate beauty
+of her face? Little Sylvia, who first won my boyish affection,
+and with whom I made a solemn contract of marriage when we were
+only seven years old? Did I not remember how I would pass her
+house on my way to school, and stand at the gate and whistle
+until she came shyly out, with her face as red as her little hood
+and tippet, and give me her books to carry, and protest with the
+ever present coquetry of girlhood that she thought I had gone
+long ago? Could I ever forget how I saved my coppers, one by one,
+until I had accumulated a sum large enough to buy a whole
+cocoanut, which I presented to her in the proudest moment of my
+life, and how the other girls tossed their heads with the
+affectation of a sneer, and with pretended indifference to this
+astonishing stroke of fortune? And that fatal evening when I
+provoked my little beauty's wrath, and in all the receding
+opportunities of "Post-Office" and "Copenhagen" she had turned
+her face and rosy lips away from me, until the world was black
+with a hopeless despair? And the singing-school where she was our
+shining ornament, and that blissful night when I stood up with
+her in the village church, while we sang our duet descriptive of
+the special virtues of some particular flower nominated in the
+cantata? And how, growing older and shyer, we still preserved our
+youthful fancy even to the day I struck out into the world, both
+believing in the endurance of the tie that would draw me back?
+What caprice of fate is it that dispels the illusions of youth
+and restores them tenfold in the reflection of after years and
+over the gulf of the grave? Did I remember Sylvia?
+
+Then Mary went on to tell me of Sylvia's happy marriage to George
+Kinglake, how, when little Phyllis had come, and the world was
+at its brightest, the parents had been stricken down in the same
+week by a virulent disease, and how, with her dying breath, the
+mother had asked her sister to look after her little one and
+protect her from sorrow and harm. Very simply this stern-featured
+woman told the story of her efforts to do her duty to her
+sister's child, and it seemed to me that her face grew softer and
+her voice gentler as she went over the years they had grown older
+together, while the beauty of this woman's life was glorified by
+the willing sacrifices of imposed motherhood. I could not see
+Phyllis, for she was spending the night with friends in another
+part of the village. Next time, she hoped, I might be more
+successful.
+
+Walking slowly to the tavern my mind still went back to my little
+playmate and the golden days of youth, and if my heart grew a
+little tenderer, and my eyes were moistened by the recall, what
+need to be ashamed of the emotion? And if in the night I dreamed
+that I was a boy again, and that a fair-haired child played with
+me in the changing glow of dreamland in the best and purest
+scenes of the human comedy, was it a delusion to be dispelled, a
+memory to be put aside? Did I remember Sylvia?
+
+
+
+
+The thought that my train was to leave at ten o'clock did not
+depress me as I awoke, with the sunlight streaming through the
+window, for, after all, I was obliged to admit that the monotony
+of Meadowvale and the sluggishness of my village friends were
+beginning to have an appreciable effect. Then the memory of
+little Sylvia came to me again, and nothing seemed pleasanter, as
+a benediction to the old days, than a visit to the burying-ground
+where she was sleeping. The previous day I had paid the
+obligations of remembrance and respect to the graves of
+my kindred, and it gave me at first an uncomfortable feeling
+to realize that the thought of them was less potent than
+the recollection of this young girl. But was it strange or
+inexcusable? Had they not lived out their lives of honored
+usefulness, and grown old and weary of the battle? And had
+not she passed away just as the greater joys of living were
+unfolding, and the assurance of happiness was the stronger?
+Poor Sylvia!
+
+The spectacle of a correctly dressed, middle-aged man passing
+down the street, bearing a somewhat cumbersome burden of
+lilies-of-the-valley and forget-me-nots, must have had its
+peculiar significance to the inhabitants of the village, and many
+curious glances were my reward. I passed along, however, without
+explanations in distinct violation of rural etiquette. The old
+caretaker of the burying-ground met me at the entrance and gave
+me the directions--second path to the right, half way up the
+hill, just to the left of the big elm. The old man had known me
+as a boy and would have detained me in conversation, but I
+pleaded that my time was short, and reluctantly he let me go my
+way. Slowly up the hill I walked, occasionally pausing to place a
+forget-me-not on the grave of one I had known in childhood. Even
+old Barrows did not escape my passing tribute--a cynical,
+cross-grained old fellow, the aversion of the boys, who tormented
+him and whom he tormented with reciprocal vigor. No need of a
+forget-me-not for Barrows, for he never forgot anything, so I
+gave his somewhat neglected grave the token of a long stem of
+little lilies, in evidence that the past was forgiven, and moved
+on to avoid possible protestation.
+
+I paused under the wide-branching elm to recover my breath. The
+assent had been arduous for a gentleman inclined to portliness
+and with wind impaired by tobacco. I turned to the left, and at
+that moment, just before me, a woman's figure slowly rose from
+the ground. A creeping sensation possessed me. My heart bounded
+and my pulses thrilled. Was this Sylvia risen from the dead?
+Surely it was Sylvia's graceful girlish form! This was Sylvia's
+oval face, with Sylvia's large gray eyes. In such a way Sylvia's
+pretty light hair waved about her temples, and the pink and
+white of her delicate complexion revealed the blue veins.
+Twenty-five years had rolled back in an instant, and I was
+standing in the presence of the past. Alas, the swift passing of
+the illusion, for the conversation of the evening came to me.
+
+"You are Phyllis?" I said.
+
+"I am Phyllis," she answered softly--her mother's voice--"and you
+are Mr. Stanhope. My aunt told me."
+
+I did not answer, for I was staring stupidly at her, reluctant to
+abandon the pleasing fancy that my thinking of her had brought
+her back from the dead again. She did not speak, but glanced
+inquiringly at the flowers I held in my hand.
+
+"I knew your mother, Phyllis," I managed to say. "She was a very
+dear playmate of my childhood. I have brought these flowers to
+put upon her grave. Shall we go together?"
+
+The girl's eyes filled, and she pointed to the rising mound at
+her feet. Silently we bent over and reverently laid the lilies
+and forget-me-nots under the simple headstone.
+
+"May I talk to you of your mother?" I asked.
+
+We sat down on a rude bench in the path, and I told her of my
+childhood, of the days when Sylvia and I were sweethearts, of our
+little quarrels and frolics, of her mother's beauty and
+gentleness. The girl laughed at the recital of our misadventures,
+and the tears came into her eyes when I touched on my boyish
+affection for my playmate. Then she told me of her own life, so
+peaceful and happy in the little village, and in the neighboring
+town, where she had been educated with all the care and diligence
+of the New England impulse. I looked at my watch.
+
+"It is quarter past eleven," I said ruefully, "and my train left
+at ten."
+
+"There's another train at three," she replied. "You will go home
+and dine with us? We dine at twelve in the country, you know."
+
+If I was somewhat ashamed to face Mary Eastmann, she received us
+with the same stolidity she had manifested when we first met, and
+at once insisted that I should remain for dinner. "Go into the
+parlor," she said abruptly.
+
+Phyllis plucked the sleeve of my coat. "Don't go in there," she
+whispered; "that's Aunt Mary's room exclusively, and I'm afraid
+you'll not find it very cheerful. Come out on the porch."
+
+"I know the room," I whispered back, as we went out together. "At
+least I know the type. Lots of horse-hair belongings. Square
+piano against the wall. Wax flowers under a glass case on the
+mantel. Steel engravings of Washington crossing the Delaware.
+Family album, huge Bible, and 'Famous Women of Two Centuries' on
+the centre table. Seashells, blue wedgwood and German china
+things mingled in delightful confusion on the what-not. If not
+wax flowers, it's wax fruit."
+
+Phyllis laughed--how much her laugh was like her mother's--and
+nodded her head. "Not a bad description," she assented; "you must
+have the gift of second sight."
+
+"Not second sight. Suppose we call it the gift of second
+childhood."
+
+We sat on the porch and looked down on the lawn that sloped to
+the orchard, and watched the robins run across the grass. And I
+pointed out to Phyllis the very tree under which Sylvia and I had
+stood the day we had our first memorable quarrel, confessing that
+while at the time there was no doubt in my mind that Sylvia was
+clearly at fault, I was now prepared to concede, after plenty of
+reflection, that possibly she might have had a reasonable defence.
+The recital of this pathetic incident led to other reminiscences
+connected with the old house and its grounds, and I was hardly in
+the second chapter when Mary came out and ordered us in to dinner.
+Mary never invited, never requested; she merely ordered. We sat at
+the table, and at a severe look from Mary I stopped fumbling with
+my napkin, while Phyllis--sweet saint!--folded her hands and asked
+the divine blessing. Pagan philosopher that I was, I was singularly
+moved by the simple faith of these two women, and I think that when
+I am led back into the fold of my family creed, a girl as young and
+fair and holy as Phyllis will be the angel to guide me.
+
+The dinner was toothsome, the environment fascinating, the
+afternoon perfect, and so it came about quite naturally that I
+missed the three-o'clock train. "There is nothing so disagreeable
+in life," I explained apologetically to my friends, "as a hard
+and fast schedule, which keeps one jumping like an electric
+clock, doing sixty things every hour and never varying the
+performance. Fortunately trains run every day except Sunday, and
+the general order of the universe is not going to be upset
+because I am not checking myself off like a section-hand."
+
+Perhaps Mary did not wholly coincide with my argument, but she
+was called away to her sewing-circle, while Phyllis and I lounged
+lazily on the porch, I continuing my reminiscences. Garrulity
+is not merely the prerogative of age; the privilege of the
+monologue is always that of the old boy who comes back to his
+childhood's home and finds in a pretty girl a charming and
+attentive listener. He is a poor orator, indeed, who cannot
+improve such opportunities. At a convenient lull in the flow of
+discourse we went off to ride, exploring the country roads I knew
+so well, and here began new matter and new reminiscences, patiently
+endured by Phyllis, who was a most delightful girl. And when we
+returned late in the afternoon it was directly in the line of
+circumstances that I should remain for tea; and after tea Phyllis
+played and sang for me in the little parlor, for Phyllis was a
+musician of no small merit. When in reply to my inquiry she sang
+a simple Scotch ballad her mother had sung so touchingly many
+years before, a great lump rose in my throat, and I sat far over
+in the shadow that she and Mary might not see how blurred were my
+eyes, and how unmanageable my emotion. At what age does it come
+to a man and a philosopher that he is no longer ashamed of
+honest, sympathetic tears?
+
+I shall never know whether it was the journey in the train,
+the air and cooking of Meadowvale, or the visits to the
+burying-ground, that upset me, but for the first time in a dozen
+years I found myself dissatisfied with my home. I remarked to
+Malachy that the roses seemed to be in a most discouraging
+condition, and that the garden in general was altogether
+disappointing. I noticed that my dogs barked a great deal, that
+the neighbors had become most tiresome, and that Bunsey was an
+unmitigated nuisance. Even the cuisine, which had been my pride
+and boast, grew at times unbearable, and I had not been home a
+fortnight before I astonished Prudence by positively assuring her
+that the dinner she had set before me was not worth any sane
+man's serious attention. Whereupon that excellent woman announced
+with superb pride that she "guessed it was about time for that
+Rogers woman to give another card-party."
+
+"Prudence," I said severely, for I encourage no flippancy on the
+part of domestics, "that remark, while probably hasty and
+ill-considered, borders on impertinence. I shall overlook it this
+time on account of your faithful services in the past. But don't
+let it happen again. In any event," I amended considerately,
+"don't let it drop in my presence."
+
+Thinking it over I came to the conclusion that Prudence was right
+in the general effect of the suggestion. What I needed was a
+change of scene. Long abstention from travel and variety of
+incident had made me restless and discontented. I had not been in
+Europe for two years. Undoubtedly I was pining for a lazy tour of
+the Continent. The thought decided me. I should book my passage
+on the steamer that sailed the Saturday of the following week.
+
+Strangely enough, at this interesting moment, I received a letter
+from the chairman of the committee on public improvements in the
+village of Meadowvale, announcing that it had been resolved to
+procure new rooms for the village library, and would Mr. John
+Stanhope do his native village the honor of subscribing a small
+amount toward this desirable end. As it is always much easier for
+an indolent man to telegraph than to write letters, I replied by
+wire that Mr. Stanhope felt himself much honored by the request.
+Not entirely satisfied with this confession, I sent a second
+telegram an hour later doubling my subscription. Still my
+conscience troubled me.
+
+"I have not done my duty," I said to myself. "Here I am, a man of
+means, I may say of large wealth, with no special obligations
+resting upon me, and yet I have done nothing to benefit or enrich
+my old home. It is strange that it has not occurred to me before
+what a privilege, what an honor, it is to be a philanthropist
+even in a small way, and with what alacrity those whom Heaven has
+blessed with a fortune should respond to the calls of deserving
+need. I blush for my past thoughtlessness, and I shall hasten to
+atone for my astonishing neglect. My duty lies before me, and I
+shall not shrink from it, whatever the personal inconvenience."
+
+Thereupon I telegraphed for the third time to the chairman that
+it would give Mr. Stanhope the greatest pleasure to put up a
+suitable library for the village of Meadowvale, and, in order to
+guard against any possible misunderstanding, he would depart the
+following day to confer with the committee as to site and
+probable extent of the structure. This concession to my
+conscience comforted me greatly, and I prepared for my journey
+with a lightness that was almost buoyancy. The chairman and two
+of the committee met me at the junction. They were most
+deprecatory and apologetic, and mentioned with evident sorrow
+the absence of several of the members which might cause a
+postponement of the conference until the following day. I bore up
+under this intelligence with astonishing cheerfulness.
+
+"My good friends," I said, "don't let this disturb you for a
+minute. I am not so pressed for time that I cannot wait on your
+reasonable convenience. Your tavern is well kept and the food is
+wholesome. I think I may say that my old friends in Meadowvale
+will interest me until we can come to an amicable understanding.
+Suppose, to be sure of a full meeting, that we fix the time of
+conference at day after to-morrow--a little late in the
+afternoon."
+
+After this suggestion had been received with suitable expressions
+of gratitude, we journeyed together to the village, where I was
+duly turned over to old Pettigrew. And then, as the day was by no
+means done, I strolled down the street and, most naturally and
+quite unthinkingly, found myself a few minutes later looking over
+the Eastmann gate at Phyllis on the porch. To say that this
+charming girl was surprised by my sudden appearance was no less
+true than to admit that she did not seem in the least displeased.
+I positively had no intention of going in, but before I knew it I
+was sitting beside her, relating in the most casual way the
+reason of my coming.
+
+"How good it was of you," said the ingenuous creature, "and how
+delighted and grateful Meadowvale will be. It must be glorious to
+be rich enough to do things for other people."
+
+Now it is not a disagreeable sensation to feel that one is rich
+and good and glorious in the large gray eyes of a very pretty
+woman, and I was conscious of the mild intoxication from the
+compliment. "It is, indeed," I answered magnanimously. "I have
+always maintained that money is given to us in trust for those
+around us, and that in making others happy we find our greatest
+happiness. I regret that I have not wholly lived up to this
+undeniably correct principle."
+
+"It will require at least a thousand dollars," she said naively.
+
+"Oh, at least."
+
+She was silent a moment. Then she said: "I was wondering what I
+would do if I had a thousand dollars to give away."
+
+"What do you think you would do?"
+
+"Speaking for my own preferences I think I should like to
+establish a country club."
+
+"The very thing. If there is one crying want more than another in
+Meadowvale it is a country club, with golf links, tennis courts,
+and shower baths."
+
+"Now you are laughing at me."
+
+"Not at all. Fancy old Hank and you playing a foursome with Aunt
+Mary and me for the cider and apples. Why, it would add years of
+robustness to our waning lives."
+
+"No," said the girl decisively. "It isn't feasible."
+
+"Then," I went on musingly, "we might have an Art Institute, or
+the Phyllis Kinglake School of Expression, or the Meadowvale
+Woman's Club, or the Colonial Dames, or, best of all, the
+Daughters of the American Revolution."
+
+"That shows how little you appreciate the local situation," she
+responded quickly, "for your best of all is worse and worse.
+Imagine an order of Daughters in a place where every woman's
+ancestors did nothing but fight in the Revolution. As well call a
+town meeting at once. Ah,"--with a sigh--"I see that I shall
+never spend the thousand dollars in Meadowvale."
+
+"Don't be too sure of that, my dear Phyllis," I exclaimed in an
+outburst, for I was in a particularly happy and generous mood;
+"and remember that when you do decide how the money is to be
+philanthropically invested we shall see that it is forthcoming."
+
+With such agreeable banter the minutes slipped away, and when
+Mary appeared with the customary invitation to tea, it would have
+been a jolt to the harmonious order of things to decline. I
+cannot say that I have ever cordially approved the austerity of
+the New England tea-table, with its cold bread and biscuits, its
+applesauce, its frugal allowance of sardines, its basket of cake,
+and its not very stimulating pot of tea. But such are the
+compensations of pleasant society that even these chilly viands
+may be forgotten, and I said my "Amen" to Phyllis's sweet and
+modest grace with all the heartiness of a thankful man. As no
+gentleman may, with propriety, run away immediately after he has
+accepted hospitality, I lingered in the evening, and we had more
+music, which so calmed and rested me that I wondered at my past
+nervousness and marvelled that I had even contemplated a journey
+across the water.
+
+How it came about that the next morning Phyllis and I were
+strolling over the village, down by the river and into the
+pleasant woods, I have forgotten, but I dare say that we were
+discussing further developments of philanthropy, and endeavoring
+to come to a conclusion as to the proper disposition of that
+troublesome thousand dollars. The girl was so young and
+joyous, so pretty, so arch, so fascinating with that little
+coquettishness that is not the usual type of the Puritan maiden,
+I could not find it in my heart to remember Mary's words and "try
+to instil in her a closer appreciation of the more serious
+purposes of life." Indeed life is so serious that it is one of
+the blessed decrees of Mother Nature that we have that brief
+allotment of time when it is too serious to think about, and
+youth passes so quickly that it is criminal to rob it of its
+golden hour. In such a presence I felt my own spirits rising, my
+step becoming springy, my whole nature less sluggish, and, had I
+looked in the mirror, I should have confidently expected to see a
+youthful bloom in my cheeks and a return of hair to primary
+conditions.
+
+It is due to this interesting young woman to say that she coyly
+urged me not to forget my other friends, since I was to leave so
+soon, and it pleased me to fancy that she was not altogether
+offended when I spoke somewhat hastily and rather flippantly of
+those of my former companions who had lapsed into tediousness. I
+reminded her also that as the happiest memory of my childhood was
+associated with her mother, so it was sweet to me to be with her
+and live again, in a pleasant dream, the brightness of the past.
+Then, for her mother's sake, she shyly let me take her hand while
+I went over again, not without emotion, the story of my early
+love. Dear little Sylvia!
+
+The meeting of the committee was followed by a general
+congregation of citizens, and I was invited to the platform,
+where I outlined my plans. I hinted that the library was merely
+the beginning of a number of beneficences which I desired to
+contribute to Meadowvale's prosperity, and as I looked down upon
+my listeners and caught sight of Phyllis, glancing up with
+flushed cheeks and sparkling eyes, I was nearly betrayed into
+promises of the most preposterous nature. At the end of
+my remarks--I recall that I spoke with unusual grace and
+eloquence--the chairman stood up and gravely thanked me,
+intimating that I was a credit to Meadowvale and its perfect
+public school system. I fancy I should have been applauded if it
+had been compatible with the nature of the people of Meadowvale
+to make so riotous a demonstration. At the close of the meeting
+it happened, by the purest accident, that I walked home with Mary
+and Phyllis, and when Mary said in her blunt way that I really
+had been most generous, Phyllis did not speak, but she slipped
+her hand under my arm and gave me an appreciative little squeeze,
+which made me regret that I had not pledged another thousand.
+
+I was to leave the next morning, thanks to the officious members
+of the committee, who had so blunderingly hurried matters to
+accommodate me that I had no longer an excuse of remaining. And
+it was for this reason that I went in and sat again in the little
+parlor, while Phyllis sang for me the songs that were my
+favorites, and some her mother sang in the long ago. Memories
+were again pleasantly stirred within me, as was not infrequent in
+those days, and I experienced all the happiness that comes to him
+who is persuaded that he has made himself a little above the
+ordinary attractions of the earth. In this excess of good
+feeling, and stimulated alike by the music and the consciousness
+of a philanthropic impulse, I waited until the moment of parting
+before declaring definitely my excellent intentions.
+
+"My dear Mary," I began, turning to that admirable spinster, "you
+know how our childhood was linked by a close family feeling, and
+how you and Sylvia and I planned in our simple ambitions to live
+together in the great world outside. We may say now that this was
+childish romance, and that the caprice of time has made it an
+idle fancy. For many years we have been separated, and only by a
+happy chance have we been brought together. Fortune has been kind
+to me. I am called a rich man, and I believe I may say without
+boasting that I am far beyond the need of anxiety. But to a
+degree I am a lonely man. My sister's child is my one near
+relative in the world, and he is a young man with an excellent
+business, able to take care of himself, and naturally engrossed
+with his own occupations. You can understand that at my time of
+life, alone as I am, and still young enough to appreciate the
+joys of living, I have a feeling of desolation for which no
+riches can compensate. Had fortune given me a daughter, like our
+Phyllis here, I think no happiness could have been so great. It
+has pleased me to look back upon the past, to recall the days of
+our childhood, and to see in Phyllis the image of her mother. Why
+can I not link the present and the future with the past? Why can
+I not look on Phyllis as my own daughter, and give to her all the
+father love I have learned to feel? I do not rob you either of
+her love or her presence. I merely add a new joy to my life, and
+know that in caring for you both and in contributing to her
+happiness, and securing her against misfortune after we are taken
+away, I am carrying out the pledge, however idle at the time, I
+made to Sylvia."
+
+I fancied I saw what may have been the suspicion of a tear in
+Mary Eastmann's eye. It vanished as quickly as it came, and when
+she spoke and thanked me for my generous offer, her voice was as
+calm and her manner as collected as if I had made a casual
+suggestion for attendance at a prayer meeting. She could not
+deny that the opportunity was too enticing to be ignored, and
+she admitted that my fatherly proposition was distinctly
+advantageous. Her New England independence rather revolted at the
+thought of any immediate financial assistance, which was not
+needed, while her New England thrift approved a future settlement
+based on family friendliness of many years' standing. On the
+whole she was inclined to be favorable to my point of view.
+
+As for Phyllis, she had listened to me with undisguised
+amazement. Her big gray eyes had grown larger, and the color left
+her cheeks as I finished. Then the rosy red rushed back, her lip
+quivered and the tears sprang to her eyes. A moment later she
+smiled, then laughed, and was serious again. How incomprehensible
+are these young girls! Poor child! she had never known a father's
+love.
+
+Phyllis followed me to the door. The light, streaming from the
+parlor, shone squarely on her exquisite face. A thrill of
+pleasure went through me as I realized that at last I had a
+daughter whom I could love and cherish. I took her hand in both
+of mine, and, as I released it, I parted the light, wavy hair,
+and kissed her forehead. It seemed to me that she trembled
+slightly, but in a moment she was herself, and a gleam of
+merriment was in her eyes, as she said:
+
+"Of course you will write to me--papa?"
+
+Doubtless the novelty of the situation made me just a little
+embarrassed. To be called "papa" the first time by a pretty girl
+was more embarrassing than I had expected. And why that
+half-laugh in her eye, and why that almost quizzical tone? Was I
+not kind and good enough to be her father, and had I not tried to
+show her every paternal consideration? Was I not honestly
+endeavoring to fulfil a sacred pledge? I was perplexed but not
+discouraged. "I will prove to her," I said to myself with
+firmness, "that I am entirely worthy of her filial affection, and
+that she may lean confidently upon me." And I went straightway
+to bed, and dreamed of her all night as every true father should
+dream of the daughter of his heart and his hope.
+
+
+
+
+In the very nature of things it was necessary that I should
+return frequently to Meadowvale, to confer with the village
+committee and make all proper arrangements for beginning so
+important a local enterprise. While this put an end to my
+projected trip to Europe I accepted the situation with calmness
+and forbearance, satisfied that in the pursuit of duty and in
+giving happiness to my fellow creatures I should have the reward
+of an approving conscience. To my nephew, Frederick Grinnell, I
+gave the task of preparing the plans, and his excellent
+suggestions were cordially adopted. Much of my spare time--and it
+is amazing how much spare time one has in a village--was spent at
+the Eastmann cottage with my new daughter, and in the evening I
+talked to her of the world outside, quite, I fancy, as Othello
+may have spoken to Desdemona, but with a more conservative and a
+better impulse. I unfolded to her the wonders of great London,
+the pleasures of Paris, the beauties of Venice, the sacred
+mysteries of Rome, the noble traditions of Athens. I journeyed
+with her up the Nile and down the Rhine. One night we were in gay
+Vienna, another in Berlin, a third in the grandeur of the
+Alhambra. From the fjords of Norway to the tea houses of Japan
+was the journey of a few minutes, and the indifference of my
+surfeited life gave way before the kindling enthusiasm of this
+lovely country girl, whose world had been the area of scarcely
+more than a township.
+
+But the paternal relation, however honest and commendable my
+intentions, did not seem to thrive as I had fondly hoped. Only in
+her teasing moments would this vivacious creature admit the
+solemnity of our compact, and when she called me "papa" there was
+always that gleam of the eye, with that merriment of tone, which
+may not have been disrespectful but was certainly not filial.
+This troubled me exceedingly. I thought it all over and one night
+I said to her:
+
+"My dear Phyllis, it has become only too evident that you do not
+entertain that deferential feeling for me which a daughter should
+have for a father. I shall not describe your emotions as I have
+analyzed them, but I am satisfied that we shall not make a
+complete success of my long cherished plan. However, I am not
+prepared to withdraw unreservedly from my schemes for your
+comfort and happiness, and since you cannot look upon me as a
+father, or treat me like a father, I have another suggestion to
+offer. Let me be your elder brother, and watch over and guard you
+as a brother's duty should direct. There shall be no diminution
+of my love, no retraction of my promises. Perhaps, in the feeling
+that I am your brother, you will talk with me with greater
+frankness, and feel more closely drawn to me, and we shall be all
+the better and the happier for the change."
+
+Thus speaking I took her pretty hand and carried it respectfully
+to my lips, at the same time patting it affectionately and
+assuring her of my brotherly devotion. And this incomprehensible
+girl threw back her head and laughed; then burst into tears,
+laughed again, flushed to crimson and ran out of the room. I was
+grieved beyond measure. Had I done wrong so quickly and rudely to
+sever a connection so holy? Had the filial feeling been suddenly
+awakened in her breast? Was I depriving this poor child of a
+tender paternal care, for which she longed, but which maidenly
+coyness could not immediately accept?
+
+As a philosopher I have made woman the subject of much research,
+and my library bears witness to the attention I have paid to the
+written opinions of the ablest writers and thinkers of all times,
+who have had anything to do with this fascinating theme. I have
+seen her in all her phases, analyzed her in all her emotions, and
+Bunsey has admitted to me that my theoretical knowledge has been
+of great value to him in dealing subtly with his heroines. And
+yet, despite my complete equipment in mental construction, I am
+constantly surprised by a new development, a sudden and
+unaccountable phenomenon of feminine nature, which undoubtedly
+escaped the experience and reasoning of the experts and sages. It
+is indeed a matter of pride in woman that while man has studied
+her for thousands of years, she continues to exhibit fresh
+delights in her infinite variety of moods and to put forth
+unexpectedly new and astounding shoots.
+
+I saw Phyllis no more that evening, save in my dreams, and it
+was wholly creditable to the goodness of my motives and the
+sincerity of my affection that she abided with me in my
+slumbering fancies with no protracted intermissions. The next
+day she was as sweet and gracious as ever, but I thought her
+tone a little constrained, and when, as a father or brother
+should, I ventured to speak of the tenderness of our family
+relation, a half-imploring look came into her beautiful eyes.
+And when I casually remarked on the softness of her hair, or the
+slenderness of her fingers, her glance was timidly reproachful.
+All this gave me great unhappiness, and I discovered, to my further
+distress, that in my attempt to return to the old familiar footing
+I was neglecting the committee and losing interest in the affairs of
+the library. A certain peevishness took possession of me; I was
+no longer myself, and I lost the gayety and sprightliness which
+had been always my distinguishing virtues.
+
+Furthermore I missed the companionship and solace of my books in
+this emergency, for I had no reference library to which I could
+go in Meadowvale for aid in establishing the true condition of
+this strange girl. I recalled dimly that somewhere on my shelves
+was a volume which contained a fairly analogous case, but while I
+knew that I possessed such a book I could not remember the
+circumstances or the incidents cited, and this added to my
+unrest. Only a student can understand the absolute wretchedness
+which overtakes a man when he finds himself miserably dependent
+on a distant library. For several days I gave myself up entirely
+to my mental depression, greatly wondering at the perplexing
+change in my life, and marvelling that in all my explorations in
+philosophy I had not provided for just such a crisis, whatever it
+might be. One afternoon as I sat in my room at the tavern,
+looking idly out of the window and across the little river which
+rippled by, something seemed to strike me violently in the
+forehead. It may have been a telepathic suggestion, it may have
+been a return to consciousness; at all events it was an idea. I
+leaped from my chair, put on my hat, and proceeded rather
+feverishly to the Eastmann cottage. Phyllis was away for the day;
+Mary was knitting in the sitting-room. I watched her in silence
+for a moment, and then I said abruptly:
+
+"Mary, I think I should like to marry Phyllis."
+
+Mary Eastmann was not the type of woman to lose herself or betray
+astonishment. She pushed her spectacles sharply above her eyes,
+looked at me sternly, and said in a rasping voice.
+
+"John Stanhope, don't be an old fool."
+
+"Whatever I may be, Mary," I answered, much nettled by her tone,
+"I do not think anybody can properly regard me as a fool. As for
+the other qualification," I went on complacently, "I am not so
+old."
+
+"You and Sylvia were the same age, and she would have been
+forty-eight."
+
+"A man is as old as he feels," I ventured, finding refuge in a
+proverb.
+
+"That is evasive, and has nothing to do with the question.
+Beside, what reason have you to believe that Phyllis has the
+slightest desire to marry you?"
+
+"Frankly, not the slightest reason in the world," I replied with
+the utmost candor. "That is why I have been so bold as to speak
+to you on the subject."
+
+"Perhaps you thought I might use my influence to help you
+along?"
+
+"Quite the contrary, my dear Mary, I assure you. I may not know
+very much about women"--I was quite humble when separated from my
+library--"but I do know that nothing is so fatal to a lover's
+prospects as the encouragement of the loved one's relations. You
+see that I am perfectly frank."
+
+"Then you wish my opposition?"
+
+"Come, let us be reasonable. I have told you I wish to marry
+Phyllis. I know my good points, and I am not unacquainted with my
+weak ones. Unhappily I can figure out my age to a day. Alas, I am
+forty-eight, and Phyllis is not yet twenty-three. The difference
+is positively ghastly from a sentimental standpoint, but if I
+love her, and she is not hopelessly indifferent to me, I think
+that even that difficulty can be bridged. You know my position,
+my character, my general reputation. Neither of us knows what
+Phyllis really thinks or what she will say or do in the matter. I
+do not ask either for your opposition or your good offices. I
+have come to you as an old friend and the girl's nearest
+relative to tell you exactly how I feel and what I wish to gain.
+And I ask only that I may have the same chance to win her
+affection that you might grant to a younger man."
+
+Mary's voice was gentler when she spoke again. "John," she said,
+"Phyllis is all I have in the world. It is my one idea to have
+her happily married to a worthy man whom she honestly loves.
+Providence, in inscrutable wisdom, may have decreed that you are
+that man, but," she continued with a sudden return of Yankee
+caution, "I have my doubts, considering your age. However, you
+have acted honorably in coming to me, and while I think Phyllis
+would be a better daughter than wife to you, I cannot speak for
+her. Remember that she is very young and very inexperienced. Her
+acquaintance with men has been slight. You are a man of the world
+and with enough of the surface polish--I don't say it stops with
+that--to dazzle any girl accustomed to such surroundings as we
+have here. Undoubtedly an offer from you would flatter her; it
+might induce her to accept you, thinking that she loved you. Be
+careful. Be sure of your ground before it is too late."
+
+As I walked back to the village I mused on what Mary had said,
+but I felt no apprehension. Most lovers are alike in this--in
+youth, in middle age, in senility. Perhaps the advantage of
+middle life is that a man is more the master of himself, more in
+possession of the faculties necessary to carry him through a
+crisis. Without the impetuous desire of youth, or the deadened
+sensibilities of old age, he has a certain serene confidence that
+is a mixture of love and philosophy. It disturbed me somewhat to
+find with what equanimity I faced a situation which promised
+nothing. It really annoyed me to note that I was picking out
+mentally the place to which I should conduct Phyllis in order to
+have the harmonious environment adapted to a sentimental
+proposition. I remembered that down by the river, just beyond
+the willows, there was an old tree where Sylvia and I--ah, so
+many years ago!--had sat and talked of our lives before us. To
+that sacred spot I would lead Sylvia's daughter, and, passing
+gently from the past to the present, I would tell her of my love
+and of my fondest hopes. How dignified and appropriate such a
+spot for a frank, calm, and self-contained avowal!
+
+Thus philosophically and amiably plotting I walked contentedly
+along, and, looking up, I saw Phyllis coming toward me, swinging
+her hat in her hand, and suggesting in her girlish beauty and
+graceful outline the poet's shepherdess. She did not see me, and,
+yielding to a sudden impulse, I stepped quickly aside in the
+shadow of a neighbor's house, as she passed on with her eyes on
+the ground. I followed at a little distance, and discovered,
+much to my dismay, that she chose the road that led to the
+burying-ground. Now a cemetery is not at all the spot that a man,
+whatever his philosophy, would select for a tender declaration,
+but I was buoyed by the remembrance of Mary's words. "The finger
+of Providence may be in it," I muttered. "The Lord's will be
+done."
+
+Slowly up the winding path she walked, and I as slowly followed.
+When I reached her, she was standing at her mother's grave, just
+as she had stood the morning we first met. I tried to accept this
+as an omen, but failed miserably, and omens, after all, depend on
+the point of view. She raised her eyes, and, seeing me, blushed,
+another omen which means comparatively little to a man who is
+aware of the thousand emotions that are responsible for the blush
+of woman. I was again annoyed by the discovery that my pulses
+were not beating wildly, and that my heart was not throbbing
+tumultuously, and when I addressed a commonplace remark to her I
+was thoroughly ashamed and humiliated. It seemed like taking a
+mean advantage of innocence and inexperience.
+
+We sat together on the little bench, and for the first time in
+our acquaintance she appeared embarrassed, as if she knew what
+was passing in my mind. I have always believed that women, in
+addition to their acknowledged intuition, have a special sense
+that enables them to anticipate a declaration of passion, and I
+had no doubt that Phyllis was fully prepared for my confession in
+spite of her embarrassment. This induced me to proceed to the
+point without unnecessary preliminaries.
+
+"Phyllis," I said, not without a certain agreeable ardor, "I have
+been talking with Aunt Mary."
+
+"Indeed?"
+
+"And about you."
+
+"Really?"
+
+"When I say that I have been talking with Aunt Mary, and about
+you," I continued in a grieved tone, for I do not like jerky
+responses, "I wish you to understand that it was in connection
+with no ordinary topic. Phyllis,"--I spoke with the utmost
+tenderness--"can you not guess the nature of our discussion?"
+
+Phyllis was equal to the emergency; her embarrassment had
+disappeared. "I am glad," she said, "that your conversation so
+far as it related to me was out of the ordinary. I suppose I may
+ask what the topic was--that is, if you don't mind telling."
+
+This was approaching the serious. "Phyllis, I was telling Aunt
+Mary that I loved you and wished to make you my wife."
+
+A flash, half merry, half angry, came to her eye. "That was
+thoughtful of you. Is it customary for gentlemen in the city,
+when they think they love a girl, to honor all her relations with
+their confidence before they speak to the girl herself?"
+
+I took her hand. She made the slightest motion to withdraw it,
+and permitted it to remain in my grasp. "Phyllis," I said with
+all earnestness, "do not misunderstand me. I sought you at the
+house. You were absent. Your Aunt Mary and I have been friends
+from childhood, and it was only natural that out of my heart I
+spoke the words that were in my mind. I told her that I loved
+you, just as at that moment I might have shouted it from the
+housetop. My heart was full of you and I had to speak. Can't you
+understand?"
+
+The girl was still obdurate, and she spoke with some petulance.
+"If that is the case, perhaps it is just as well that it was Aunt
+Mary and not one of the neighbors."
+
+"Dear little Phyllis, you are not angry with me because I love
+you? You cannot remain angry with me because I confessed my love
+before I met you to-day? If you had only seen with what
+applications of cold water your aunt rewarded my confidence, you
+would pity and not reproach me."
+
+For a minute the girl was silent. Then she asked softly: "How
+long have you known that you loved me?"
+
+"Must I answer that question candidly and unreservedly?"
+
+"Unreservedly and candidly."
+
+I seized her other hand and held her firmly. "About fifty
+minutes."
+
+She laughed, rather joyously I thought. "And having loved me for
+fully fifty minutes, you wish to make me your wife? Confiding
+man!"
+
+"Little girl," I said tenderly, "let us be serious. If my dull
+consciousness did not awaken till an hour ago, my heart tells me
+that I have loved you ever since I first saw you standing near
+this spot. I am not going to ask you now whether you love me, or
+ever can learn to love me. It is happiness enough for me to-day
+to know how much I love you, and to know that I have told you of
+that love. I do not care to have my dream too rudely and too
+suddenly dispelled. Very probably you do not care for me as I
+should like to have you care for me, but do not make a jest of my
+affection. I am wholly aware of the preposterousness of my
+demands in many respects"--this sounded very conventional and
+commonplace, but every lover must say it--"and, believe me, I
+shudder when I think of what I have dared confess."
+
+Then she said with the most delightful demureness: "Mr. Stanhope,
+is it likely that a girl would sit in a burying-ground on a bench
+with a gentleman, allowing him to hold both her hands, unless she
+cared for him a little--just a little?"
+
+Up to this moment I had fairly forgotten that I was depriving her
+of all power of resistance, but with such encouragement I took an
+even more sympathetic grasp and sat a trifle closer, while the
+minutes ticked away. A robin flew down from the tree near by and
+saucily hopped toward us, until at a rebuking call from his mate
+he flew away, and I fancied that I could hear them talking over
+the situation, and drawing conclusions from their own happiness.
+Phyllis was the first to break the charming spell.
+
+"Mr. Stanhope," she asked, hardly above a whisper, "what did Aunt
+Mary say when you told her that you wished to make me your
+wife?"
+
+"She said, Phyllis, that Providence may have decreed that I am
+the man to bring you happiness."
+
+And still in that same enchanting whisper, with her face a little
+rosier, as she half hid it below my shoulder: "Mr. Stanhope, do
+you think that a girl with my Christian training could fly in the
+face of Providence?"
+
+
+
+
+The philosopher was in love. It comes, I have no doubt, to every
+well-ordered man to be in love once. Some there are who maintain,
+with plausibility, that the passion we call love may be of
+frequent recurrence, and they point to the passing fancies of
+boys and girls, the romances of moonlight, the repeated sighings
+of the fickle Corydon, and the matrimonial entanglements of the
+aging Lydia, as evidence for their argument. That there are
+varying degrees of the ecstatic emotion cannot be truthfully
+denied. Heaven has wisely decreed that the heart, once filled
+with its ideal, may be compensated for the bitter hour of sorrow
+by the soothing balm of a new affection, and it is even possible
+that the second love may be more satisfying than the first, the
+third or fourth more typical of exaltation than its predecessors.
+But love, whether early or late, in the perfect absorption of the
+faculties comes only once; as compared with this remarkable
+mental state all other conditions are unemotional, unfilling.
+
+The true lover rises early, before the world is astir. If it is
+summer and in the country, his thoughts lead him to the cool
+groves, the shady banks of the river, the retired spots where he
+may uninterruptedly commune with his happiness or his misery, and
+reflect on the blessings that are to be, or should be, his. Was
+it not then as a true lover that in the early morning I walked
+into the country, and down the banks of the stream where Sylvia
+and I had strayed and talked in the sunny days of youth? And
+nature seemed a part of the wedding procession, and the squirrels
+on the fence rails, and the robins, wrens, and wood-thrushes in
+the trees chirped and twittered: "John Stanhope is in love! John
+Stanhope is in love!" And the mocking crow, lazily flapping his
+wings at a safe distance, croaked enviously: "Ha, ha! old
+Stanhope is in love. Ha, ha!" Yet the whole conspiracy of
+animated nature could not make old Stanhope in his present
+exaltation regretful of his age or ashamed of his passion.
+
+Mary Eastmann had accepted the situation without comment. She
+neither congratulated nor demurred, but went on with her
+household duties with the same method and precision as before.
+Men may come and go, hearts may be won and lost, republics may
+totter and empires may fall, but the grand scheme of sweeping,
+dusting, bed-making, and cooking knows no interruption. If I did
+not understand I at least commended this housewifely prudence,
+and often when the domestic battle was at its height I would
+spirit away my little charmer for the discussion of topics within
+my comprehension. At the outset I had declared that while it had
+pleased Providence to begin our romance in a burying-ground, I
+did not propose to sacrifice all tender sentiment to meditations
+among the tombs, and I bore her away to the old tree down by the
+river, where we sat for hours together as I unfolded my plans for
+our future life.
+
+A man who has sat at the feet of the philosophers from Ovid to
+Schopenhauer, and has gorged his intellect with the abstract
+principles of love, naturally adapts himself to the professorial
+capacity, and I soon saw that Phyllis, while one of the most
+lovable, one of the sweetest of girls, was almost wholly ignorant
+of the psychology of passion. I could not expect that a young
+girl of twenty-two would discourse glibly of the emotion in its
+intellectual phase, but I could not bear the thought that she
+should enter lightly into so serious a compact, and without
+gaining a reasonable comprehension of its mental analysis. Hence,
+as opportunity presented, I enriched her mind with the beauties
+of love from the standpoint of philosophers and thinkers, and
+showed her the priceless blessings that must result from a union
+dictated by careful provision of reasoning. To these addresses
+she listened with sweet patience, and if she did not always grasp
+their meaning, she showed much admiration for my erudition and
+frequently remarked that she had no idea that love was so
+abstruse a science. It seemed to me, in the serenity of my years
+and the calm assurance of my love, that I was a most persistent
+wooer, and I was greatly grieved when she broke out rather
+petulantly one afternoon:
+
+"I don't believe you really love me."
+
+"You don't believe I love you? And why?"
+
+She hesitated, half abashed by her own outburst, then added a
+little defiantly: "Well, in the first place, you never quarrel
+with me."
+
+"And why should I quarrel with you? Aren't you the most amiable,
+the most perfect little woman in the world?"
+
+"Oh, of course; I know all that. But I have always read, and
+always believed, that when two persons are truly, deeply in love,
+they have most exciting quarrels. Is it not true that in all
+romances the man is eternally quarrelling with the girl and
+bidding her farewell forever?"
+
+"Yes, and coming back in ten minutes to weep and grovel at her
+feet and beg her to forgive him. My dear little Phyllis, why
+should I bid you farewell forever, when I am morally certain that
+in half that time I should be cringing in the turf, weeping and
+begging you to say that all is forgiven and forgotten?"
+
+"That would be lovely," she said pensively.
+
+"Perhaps, but it would be very undignified and unnecessary. And I
+am not at all sure that you would admire me in that attitude even
+if I did imitate the heroes of romance. A weeping lover is much
+more agreeable in a novel than in actual life. However if you
+insist that we must quarrel, in order to demonstrate the
+sincerity of my affection, I shall suggest that we have our spats
+when we part for the night, in order that no precious waking
+hours may be lost."
+
+"You are joking," she exclaimed with a little pout.
+
+"Not at all. Still," I added reflectively, "even this plan has
+its disadvantages, for if we quarrel when we part at night, it
+will necessitate my return to your window, which would not only
+annoy your aunt but might scandalize the neighbors. Furthermore
+it might give me a shocking cold, unless you immediately
+repented, for the nights are very damp. No," I sighed with great
+feeling, "all this seems impracticable. You must give me a better
+reason for my coldness."
+
+Phyllis toyed with a clover blossom, and made no answer. I went
+on:
+
+"As a slight indication of my unlover-like hauteur, let me
+confess that I am going to bring you a marvellously glittering
+bauble when I come back from the city, something that will
+bewilder you by day and dazzle you by night."
+
+She shrugged her shoulders. "Of course you are; you are always
+giving me presents."
+
+I laughed at this. "Well, suppose I am; I have never heard that
+it is a sign of waning affection to bestow gifts on the loved
+one."
+
+"You refuse me nothing. I dare say you would give me the Boston
+State House if I wished it."
+
+"No, you are wrong there," I replied decisively. "If I bought the
+State House I should be compelled to include the emblematic
+codfish, and you know my aversion to codfish."
+
+She smiled at the thought, recalling the Sunday breakfast, and
+then with a roguish look and a half-embarrassed laugh she said:
+"At all events you cannot deny that you did not kiss me when you
+left last night."
+
+"Didn't I?" I asked in amazement, and then, quite thrown off my
+guard, I added thoughtlessly: "I had forgotten."
+
+"That," she replied quietly, "was because you were so taken up
+with the philosophy of love, and the mental attitude, that you
+overlooked the physical demonstration. Do you remember the
+conversation?"
+
+Unfortunately I did. I recalled that I had spent an hour or more
+defining the moral status of love and proving the sufficing
+reason. It was not a pleasant reflection that so agreeable and
+instructive a conversation was not thoroughly appreciated.
+
+"We spoke at length on love," I ventured feebly.
+
+"That is, you did," she replied. "I'll admit that it was better
+than an ordinary sermon, because the subject was more personal.
+But don't you think we admitted the sufficing reason at
+the start, and isn't it natural that a girl who has been
+conventionally brought up is pretty well satisfied in her own
+mind of the moral status? Of course," she added, with a toss of
+her pretty head, "I am not asking you or anybody else to kiss me.
+I am merely curious to know if this plays any part in the
+philosophy of love as understood by the greatest thinkers."
+
+Her speech had given me time to pull myself together. "No," I
+said with marked emphasis, "I did not kiss you, because I had
+noted the unworthy suspicions you have expressed to-day, and
+I was hurt and grieved. It was hard for me to exhibit my
+displeasure in this way, and I am regretful now that I have
+learned that it was simply playfulness on your part. Don't
+interrupt. I am satisfied that the pure merriment of your nature
+is responsible for this assault, and I shall take great pleasure
+in making up this evening for the deficiencies of last night."
+
+She laughed and we were friends again. And with such jocular
+asperities the days passed quickly and agreeably until my nephew
+arrived with the plans and specifications. Frederick Grinnell was
+not only my nephew, but an architect of reputation and promise,
+considering his years and experience. Like Phyllis he had been
+left an orphan early in life, and it had been my pleasure and
+privilege to give him an education and see that he was fairly
+started in life. While I think I may say that Frederick was not
+quite so attractive as was I at his age, he was nevertheless a
+fine, manly young fellow, tall, well put together, of good
+habits, industrious and devoted to his profession. It pleased me
+to see that he admired Phyllis's pretty face and bright, animated
+manner; but one evening, when I fancied that he was too deeply
+stirred by her really beautiful voice, I took the opportunity to
+converse with him confidentially as we walked back to the tavern.
+
+"I have been intending to tell you, Frederick," I began a little
+airily, "of the relations existing between Miss Kinglake and
+myself. So far it has been a profound secret"--I did not then
+know that the entire village was gossiping about it--"but I feel
+that I owe it to you, as my nearest relative, to admit that Miss
+Kinglake and I are engaged."
+
+I paused, and noting that he did not wince or appear in the least
+degree discomposed, continued:
+
+"Of course you will respect my confidence in this matter. Of
+course," I added magnanimously, "it will be perfectly proper for
+you to signify to Miss Kinglake that you are aware of our little
+secret as that will put us all on a better basis and lead to no
+misunderstandings. It would be awkward to play at cross purposes,
+and I should be extremely sorry, my dear boy, to think that I had
+withheld anything from you, for you have always enjoyed my
+fullest trust."
+
+Whatever he may have thought, his manner betrayed no unusual
+interest. "I congratulate you," he replied very calmly.
+
+Now that so perfect an understanding existed in the immediate
+family circle, I gave myself no further uneasiness. I was truly
+rejoiced to notice that Frederick was deferentially polite to
+Phyllis, and I encouraged him to show her those polite attentions
+which my betrothed would reasonably expect from my nephew. And at
+times I even insisted that he should represent me at certain
+gatherings of Phyllis's friends, who were too young and
+frivolous to claim my serious attention. When he protested, and
+pleaded headache, business, or other sign of disinclination, I
+rallied him good-humoredly on his lack of gallantry.
+
+"Nonsense, my boy," I argued; "a young fellow of your spirit
+should be only too glad to go out with a pretty girl and enjoy
+himself. You certainly would not deprive Phyllis of an evening's
+pleasure because your uncle has a stiff knee which interferes
+with his dancing, and--confound it, you know they never let me
+smoke at these frolics. Come now, be a good fellow and show the
+proper family impulse."
+
+As they went off together I looked at them admiringly and rather
+fancied that I saw in them a suggestion of what Sylvia and I had
+been when we made the rounds of the birthday parties. For it is
+fair to confess that the image of Sylvia did not infrequently
+rise before me, and I constantly saw in Phyllis the replica of
+her adorable mother. In my happiest moments I spoke of this
+suggestion to Phyllis, and continued to regale her with fragments
+of my early life associated with her family. At first I thought
+that the girl was somewhat piqued, fearing that Frederick was
+thrust upon her, although she admitted that he was good-looking,
+polite, and danced extremely well, but I succeeded in convincing
+her that true love should not be gauged by the low standards of
+hot-night dancing, and that all philosophers agree that the
+purest affection springs from quiet contemplation, such as I
+should enjoy while she was making merry with her friends. To this
+she once ventured to remark that in that case perhaps my
+affection would thrive to greater advantage if I contented myself
+with thinking about her and not seeing her at all, a suggestion
+which wounded me in my tenderest sensibilities, for I was
+very much in love. I was also not a little disturbed when,
+supplemental to my reminiscences, Mary went back to the past and
+humorously drew pictures of me as her own early lover. There is
+considerable difference between the impalpable, airy spirit of
+the fancy and a wrinkled and austere feminine actuality of fifty.
+
+In the midst of these innocent and improving pleasures a small
+cloud appeared in the summer sky. I received a letter addressed
+in a peculiar but not ornate hand, and I opened it with
+misgivings and read it with consternation.
+
+  MR. STANHOPE SIR: Prudence and I thinks youd better come home.
+  The plummer was hear twice yisterday and the cutworms is awfle.
+  Hero got glass in her foot and the brown tale moths is bad
+  again wich is al for the presnt.
+
+                                        Respecfuly
+
+                                        MALACHY.
+
+Duty is one of the exactions of life which I have never shirked
+when there seemed no possible way of evading it, but in this
+instance the call of duty was compromised by matters of equal
+urgency, for nothing can be more important than the successful
+administration of the affairs of love. It was a happy thought
+that suggested to me a way out of the difficulty, which was
+neither more nor less than that we should all go to the city
+together. I sprang the proposition at a family conference.
+Phyllis was delighted. "There is always so much to be seen in the
+city," she cried, "and I shall meet Mr. Bunsey. It has been one
+of the dreams of my life to know a real literary man."
+
+This appeared to call for an explanation. Heaven knows I am not
+jealous of Bunsey, and would not deprive him of a single
+distinction that is honestly his. But a regard for the truth,
+coupled with much doubt as to Bunsey's ability to live up to such
+lively expectations, compelled me to resort to a little gentle
+correction.
+
+"My dear Phyllis," I said, "you must disabuse your mind of that
+fallacy. Bunsey is a popular novelist, not a literary man."
+
+"But isn't a novelist a literary man?" she asked in amazement.
+
+"Not necessarily," I replied pityingly. "In fact I may say not
+usually. Of course we are speaking of popular novelists. The
+popularity of the novelist is in proportion to his lack of
+literary style. The distinctive popular charm of Bunsey is that
+he is not literary--at least, if he is, his critics have not
+succeeded in discovering it; he successfully conceals his crime.
+If he is popular, it is because he is not literary; if he were
+literary he could not be popular."
+
+"That does not seem right," said my little Puritan.
+
+"It is not a question of ethics at all, but a matter of
+taste. However, don't be prejudiced against Bunsey because
+he is a product of the time and fairly representative of the
+civilization. You shall meet him and shall learn from him how a
+man may succeed in so-called literature without any hampering
+literary qualifications."
+
+Mary did not receive my proposition in a thankful and
+conciliatory spirit. She shook her head doubtfully, and when we
+were alone together, she gave voice to her fears.
+
+"Phyllis is country-bred," she said, "and knows nothing of the
+toils and snares that beset young girls in the city."
+
+"Toils and snares," I echoed. "One might gather from your
+objections that we contemplate taking Phyllis to the city merely
+to expose her to temptation and corrupt the serenity of her mind.
+You seem to forget the elevating influences of my modest home."
+
+"No, John; I dare say that your home is not objectionable, taken
+by itself. But I am not blind to the seductions of the great
+city. You too forget," she added, with a touch of complacency,
+"that I am not inexperienced or without knowledge of the
+profligacy of the town."
+
+"Granting all this," I said, highly diverted by her earnestness,
+"and what are some of these seductions you have in mind?"
+
+"Theatres," she replied promptly, "theatres and late hours,
+midnight suppers--and cocktails."
+
+I laughed uproariously. "My dear Mary, if these deadly sins and
+perils alarm you, we'll cut them out. I care little for theatres,
+and less for midnight suppers. And as for cocktails, I shall make
+it my peculiar charge to see that Phyllis never hears the
+abominable word. Allowing for the removal of these temptations, I
+still think that a trip to the city would do our country flower a
+world of good, though I have nothing but praise for the manner in
+which you have brought her up."
+
+"John," she answered very gravely, "I have endeavored to do my
+duty as I saw it. I have tried to bring Phyllis up in the nurture
+and admonition of the Lord."
+
+The expression carried me back to my childhood, and I bit my
+lips. "Of course you have," I said. "Wasn't I brought up in this
+same village, in the same way? Did not my good mother and my
+blessed, grandmother inflict nurture and admonition upon me, that
+I might grow up as you see me, a true child of the pilgrim
+fathers? The nurture, I remember, was a particularly hard seat in
+our particularly gloomy old meetinghouse, and the admonition took
+up the greater part of the Sabbath day, with a disenchanting
+prospect of further admonition at home if I failed to keep awake.
+I do not mean to say that I am not thankful for the experience.
+In truth I am doubly thankful--thankful that I had it, and
+thankful that it is over."
+
+To this Mary vouchsafed no further remonstrance than a
+distrustful shake of the head. Excellent woman! Is it not to such
+as you, earnest, faithful, self-sacrificing, God-fearing, that
+the best in young manhood, the purest in young womanhood, owe the
+strength of the qualities that are the vital force of the
+nation?
+
+
+
+
+In the end the united opposition was too much for Mary's
+arguments, and to town we went. The pleasure of the journey, on
+my part, was somewhat clouded as to the welcome we should receive
+from Prudence, and truly it acquired my greatest powers of
+dissimulation to feign an easy indifference and air of authority
+before that worthy creature, as with the most studied politeness
+and formal hospitality she received us at the gate. Prudence and
+I had sparred so many years that we were like two expert
+athletes, and while neither apparently noticed the other, each
+was perfectly conscious of the adversary's slightest movement.
+Hence I detected at once her strong aversion to Mary, whom she
+immediately selected as a probable mistress, and I saw her
+several times vainly try to repress a grimace of disdain and
+wrath. It was my first impulse to follow Prudence into the
+kitchen, after the ladies had gone to their rooms, and make a
+clean breast of the untoward tidings, but I lacked the moral
+courage and contented myself with an inward show of strength. Why
+should I pander to this woman's caprices? Was I not master in my
+own house? Should I not do as I pleased? I would punish her with
+the severity of my silence, and perhaps in a week or two, when
+she was more tractable, I would condescend to tell her exactly
+how matters stood. In this I would be firm.
+
+But the next morning, before my guests were out of bed, I decided
+that I was not acting wisely. Was not Prudence an old, faithful,
+and trustworthy servant? Had she not been loyal to my interests,
+and was not her whole life wrapped up in my comfort? Surely I
+wronged her to withhold from her the confidence she had so fairly
+earned, and the flush of shame came to my face as I reflected
+that I was indulging my first deceit. I took a turn in the
+garden, in the heavenly cool of the early morning, to compose my
+nerves for a very probable ordeal, and then I walked boldly into
+the kitchen where Prudence sat, with a wooden bowl in her lap,
+paring apples.
+
+It was one of the unwritten laws of the cuisine that Prudence was
+never to be disturbed when engaged in this delicate operation.
+She maintained that it destroyed the symmetry of the peel, and
+I dare say she was right. Consequently she looked at me
+reproachfully as I entered, and bent again more assiduously to
+her work. I was much flustered by the ill omen, but I knew that
+if I hesitated I was lost; so I advanced valorously, though with
+accelerated pulse, and said with all the calmness I could
+command:
+
+"Prudence, I think it only right to tell you that I am going to
+be married."
+
+One apple rolled from the bowl down along the floor and under the
+kitchen stove. I cannot conceive of any shock, however great,
+that would cause Prudence to lose more than one apple. Partly to
+conciliate, and partly to conceal my own trepidation, I made a
+gallant effort to rescue the wanderer, and as I poked the
+hiding-place with my stick, I heard her say: "Lord, I know'd it'd
+come!"
+
+"The fact that it has come, Prudence," I answered with a sickly
+attempt at gayety, "does not seem to be a reason why you should
+call with such vehemence on your Maker. There does not appear to
+be any need of Providential interposition. Things are not so bad
+as all that."
+
+I always used my most elegant English when conversing with
+Prudence. If she did not understand it, it flattered her to think
+that I paid this tribute to her intelligence.
+
+"Mr. John," she said, and there was a suspicious break in her
+voice, "for twenty years I have tried to do my duty by you, and
+now that I must go--"
+
+"Go?" I interrupted; "who said you must go? Who spoke about
+anybody's going? You certainly do not expect to turn that bowl
+of apples over to me and leave me to get breakfast?"
+
+"No, Mr. John, I shall go on and do my duty, as I see it, until
+you have made all your plans and are comfortable."
+
+"Now, look here, Prudence, I am very comfortable as things are,
+thank you. And you will pardon me if I say I cannot understand
+why you should go at all. I shall continue to eat, I hope, after
+I am married, and I think it altogether probable that I shall
+require a house-keeper and a cook. I believe they do have such
+things in well-regulated families."
+
+"At my age, and with my experience, and considerin' how we
+have lived, Mr. John, I couldn't get along with a mistress,
+'specially," she added with a touch of malice, "with a woman
+considerable older than me."
+
+"Older than you? What are you talking about? Miss Kinglake is
+young enough to be your daughter."
+
+Another apple rolled on the floor. "Miss Kinglake!" she exclaimed
+in astonishment, "that lamb? Good Lord, I thought you were goin'
+to marry the other one!"
+
+"Prudence," I said rather hotly, for I did not relish her
+amazement, "you will oblige me by not speaking of these ladies as
+the 'lamb' and 'the other one.' I might gather from your remarks
+that I am a sort of ravening wolf, instead of a well-meaning
+gentleman who is merely exercising the privilege of selecting a
+wife. But," I said, checking myself, for I was ashamed of my
+explosion, "I shall be magnanimous enough to believe that you are
+delighted with my choice, and that I have your congratulations.
+You will be glad to know that Miss Kinglake and I are perfectly
+satisfied with each other, and that we are both entirely
+satisfied with you. And now that we understand the situation, I
+think I may presume that we shall have breakfast at the usual
+hour this morning, and to-morrow morning, and for many mornings
+to come. And, by the way, Prudence, while I have honored you
+with my confidence, permit me to impress it upon you that this
+revelation is not village gossip as yet, and you will put me
+under further obligations by not mentioning the circumstance.
+Good-morning, Prudence. Kindly call the ladies at eight o'clock."
+
+And thereupon I hastily departed, leaving the good woman in a
+state of stupefaction, since, for the first and only time in our
+long and controversial association, had I retired with the last
+word. Taking a second turn in the garden I encountered Malachy,
+and my conscience reproached me. "Am I doing right," I asked
+myself, "in withholding the glad news from this faithful servant
+who has shown himself so worthy of my confidence? Is it not my
+duty to tell him--not so much to interest him in his future
+mistress as to demonstrate the trust I repose in him?"
+
+Malachy received my confidence with less excitement than I had
+expected. In fact I was slightly humiliated by his seeming lack
+of gratitude. He touched his hat very respectfully, and observed
+irrelevantly that the roses below the arbor were looking
+uncommonly well. This was a poor reward for my attempt at
+consideration, and further convinced me of the uselessness
+of establishing anything like intimate relations with the
+proletariat.
+
+"By the way, Malachy," I said in parting, "you will keep this
+matter a profound secret. Miss Kinglake and I are desirous that
+we shall not be annoyed by village chatter and premature
+congratulations."
+
+Having discharged my duty to my good servants, I felt that my
+obligations, so far as the relation with Phyllis was concerned,
+were at an end, and the morning wore away without further
+misgivings of disloyalty. In the afternoon Bunsey came over for
+his daily smoke, and as we sat together in the library, and I
+noticed the entire absence of suspicion in his manner, my heart
+smote me. "Truly," I reasoned silently, "I am behaving ill to an
+old friend who has never withheld from me the very secrets of his
+soul. Should I not be as generous, as outspoken, with him as he
+has always proved to me? Should I not confide to him this one
+precious secret, at the same time swearing him to preserve it as
+he would his life?"
+
+I blew out a ring of smoke, and then I began with the utmost
+seriousness: "Bunsey, how do you like the ladies?"
+
+He shifted his position, tipped the ashes from his cigar, and
+replied tranquilly: "Oh, I dare say I shall in time."
+
+The answer vexed me. Bunsey was a bachelor, and should have been
+therefore the more impressionable. I forgot for the moment, in my
+annoyance, that he was a novelist, and had been so diligently
+creating lovely and impossible women to order that he was not
+easily moved by the realities of humanity.
+
+"At all events," I replied with delicate irony, "I am glad that
+the future is hopeful for the ladies. My reason for asking the
+question was simply to lead the way to a confidence I intend to
+repose in you. To proceed expeditiously to the end of a long
+story, I intend to marry one of them."
+
+Bunsey's tranquillity was unshaken. "Which one?"
+
+"Which one?" I echoed with heat, "why, Miss Kinglake, of course."
+
+"Does she intend to marry you?"
+
+"Naturally."
+
+"Or unnaturally?"
+
+"Confound your impertinence!" I roared, "what do you mean by
+that?"
+
+"No impertinence, at all, my dear fellow. In fact it is most
+pertinent. Miss Kinglake is a girl, and you--well, you voted for
+Grant."
+
+"Which is your gentle way of saying that I am too old."
+
+"No, not too old; just old enough--to know better."
+
+"We are never too old to love," I said, conscious that I was
+uttering a melancholy platitude.
+
+"Too old to love? Heaven forbid! But we may be too old to
+marry--at least to marry anybody worth while. Come, Stanhope,
+tell me: do you really love this young woman?"
+
+"Love her? Here I have been telling you that I intend to marry a
+charming girl, and you turn about and ask me if I love her. Of
+course I love her. I have been loving her in one way and another
+for years."
+
+"What do you mean by that? I thought you only met her a few weeks
+ago."
+
+I smiled pityingly. "So I did, but for years she has been my
+affinity. Incidentally I don't mind saying I began by loving her
+mother."
+
+Bunsey sat up straight. "Oh, you loved her mother. Was her mother
+pretty?"
+
+"She was as you see Phyllis. In fact I think she was, if
+anything, a trifle prettier. We were playmates and schoolmates,
+and in the nature of things, if I had not wandered off to the
+city, I presume we should have married. Dear little Sylvia," I
+went on musingly, "I can see her at this moment, looking down
+from heaven and smiling on my union with her daughter. For if
+ever a match was made in heaven this was. Confound it! what are
+you doing now?"
+
+While I was talking Bunsey had reached over, taken a sheet of
+paper and was busily writing. He looked up carelessly.
+
+"Your story interests me, and is such good material that I
+thought I would make a few notes. Young boy loves young
+girl--goes to city--forgets her--young girl marries--has charming
+daughter--dies--years pass--venerable gentleman returns--sees
+daughter--great emotion on part of v. g.--thinks he loves
+her--proposes--accepted--mar--no, there I think I must stop for
+the present."
+
+"Oh, don't stop there, I beg," I said sarcastically; "if you are
+thinking of using these materials for one of your popular
+novels, be sure to throw in a few duels, several heartrending
+catastrophes, and other incidents of what you call 'action,'
+appropriately expressed in bad English."
+
+Bunsey was imperturbable. "Thank you for your appreciative
+estimate of my literary style," he replied coolly; "but really,
+my consideration for my old friend deprives me of the pleasure of
+robbing his diary."
+
+I was still out of temper. "Bunsey, I don't mind favoring you
+with a further confidence. You're an ass!"
+
+With this parting shot I strode out of the library, when,
+remembering the sacredness of my revelation, I turned back.
+
+"Of course you will understand, Bunsey, that however flippantly
+you may choose to regard what I have said to you, you will have
+the decency to keep the subject-matter to yourself. I do not ask
+your congratulations or your approval, but I demand your
+secrecy."
+
+"The ass brays acknowledgments," answered Bunsey meekly, helping
+himself to another cigar. "You may rely on my loyal and devoted
+interest. The fact that I have heard your secret twice before
+to-day shall not open my lips or cause me to violate your trust."
+
+Notwithstanding my attitude of indifference I was greatly
+troubled by Bunsey's unfeeling suggestion. Could it be possible
+that I had mistaken my own heart? Was I, yielding, as I had
+believed, to the first strong passion of my life, only deluding
+myself with a remembrance of my vanished youth? I dismissed the
+thought impatiently. For, after all, was not Bunsey a hopeless
+cynic, a fellow without a single emotion of the ennobling
+sentiment of man toward woman, a sordid story-teller, who created
+characters for money, wrecked homes, committed literary murders,
+played unfeelingly on the tenderest sensibilities, and boasted
+openly that the only angels were those made by a stroke of the
+pen and retailed at department store book-counters? And while
+thus reasoning Phyllis came to me, so winsome in her girlish
+beauty, so radiant in the happiness I had infused into her life,
+so joyous in the pleasures of the present, that I laughed at my
+own doubts, reproached myself for my own unworthy suspicions, and
+straightway forgot both Bunsey and his evil promptings.
+
+
+
+
+Love at eight and forty is a very pleasant and indolent emotion,
+marking the most delightful stage in the progress of the great
+human passion. At twenty-five we talk it; at thirty-five we act
+it; at forty-five it is pleasant to sit down and think about it.
+The very young man loves without really analyzing. Ten years
+later he analyzes without really loving. In another decade he has
+compounded the proportions of love and analysis, and becomes,
+under favoring conditions, the most dangerous and hence the most
+acceptable of suitors. The man in middle life takes his adored
+one tolerantly, and keeps his reservations to himself. In the
+ordinary course of events he has acquired a certain knowledge of
+feminine character, he knows the rocks and the shoals of love,
+and, skillful pilot that he is, he avoids them. He is sure of his
+course, master of his equipment. If he errs at all--but I
+anticipate.
+
+Those were very joyous days, notwithstanding the applications
+of cold water so liberally bestowed by my confidential advisers.
+And eagerly and successfully I exerted myself to convince
+the doubting ones in general, and Bunsey in particular, how
+absurd were their suspicions, and how apparent it was that Phyllis
+and I had been purposely created for each other. Mary threw
+herself into our pleasures as heartily and joyously as her New
+England nature would permit, which was never a very riotous
+demonstration, and Phyllis, with the effervescence and enthusiasm
+of girlhood, eagerly assented to every proposition that had
+its pleasure-seeking side; while I, as a thoughtful lover
+should, busied myself in schemes for summer dissipation, thankful
+that it was in my power to prove so devoted a knight, and
+inwardly rejoicing at my triumph over those who had taxed me
+with such unworthy thoughts. Even Frederick--good fellow that
+he was--allowed himself unusual days of vacation to partake of our
+merriment, and it pleased me greatly to see that when business
+cares or physical disinclination kept me off the programme, he no
+longer allowed his indifference to interfere with his duty as my
+nephew and personal representative. Such, I take it, is the
+obligation of all young men similarly placed.
+
+For, before many weeks had passed, I discovered that it was not
+wise to allow the fleeting dissipations of the moment, however
+alluring, to monopolize time which should be given to the serious
+affairs of life. I found that a cramped position in a boat in the
+hot sun brought on nervous headaches, and that too much time in
+the garden when the dew was falling was conducive to lumbago.
+Furthermore I had been invited by a neighboring university to
+deliver my celebrated lecture on the protagonism of Plato, and
+several new and excellent thoughts had come to me which required
+careful and elaborate development. I explained these matters
+conscientiously and fully to Phyllis, and while she offered no
+unreasonable protest, her pretty face clouded, and she did me the
+honor to say that half the enjoyment was removed by my absence.
+Once she even went so far as to declare that Plato was a "horrid
+man," and that she believed I thought more of him than of her--a
+most ridiculous conclusion but so essentially feminine that I
+forgave her at once. And, when she came to me, and put her arms
+around my neck and urged me to go with her to a tennis match--a
+foolish game where grown-up people knock little balls over a net
+with a battledore--I pointed out to her that such spectacles,
+while eminently proper for young folk, argued a failing mind in
+those of maturer years. With a charming pout she said:
+
+"Do you think you would have refused to go if my mother had asked
+you?"
+
+Now tennis is a sport that has come up since Sylvia and I were
+children together, but I recalled, with a guilty blush, the time
+when she and I won the village championship in doubles in an all
+day siege of croquet, so what could I say in my own defence?
+Therefore I went with Phyllis to the tennis-court and sat for two
+long and inexpressibly dreary hours watching the senseless and
+stupid proceedings. It was pleasant to reflect that I was with
+Sylvia's daughter, and I tried to imagine that the keen interest
+of youth still remained, but I was sadly out of place. I am
+satisfied that this game of tennis has nothing of the fascinating
+quality of croquet. On our arrival home Phyllis kissed me, and
+thanked me for what she called my "self-denial," but after that
+one experience Frederick represented me at the tennis-court, as,
+indeed, the good-natured boy consented to do at many similar
+festivities.
+
+And so the summer wore gradually away, one day's enjoyment
+lazily following another's, with nothing to disturb the serenity
+of my life, or to interfere with the calm content into which I
+had settled. Phyllis was everything that a moderate and
+reasonable lover could wish--kind, gentle, affectionate within
+the bounds of maidenly discretion, attentive to my wishes,
+and considerate of my caprices. The more I saw of her the
+more I was persuaded that I had chosen wisely and well. One
+afternoon--Frederick, at my suggestion, had gallantly given up
+his work in the office and taken Phyllis down the river. I sat
+with Bunsey in the library, and took occasion to expound to him
+the philosophy of perfect love.
+
+"The trouble is," I said, "that people rush blindly into
+matrimony. They think they are in love, work themselves up to the
+proper pitch of madness, propose and marry while they are in
+delirium. Hence, so much of the wretchedness and misery that we
+see in the homes of our friends. For my part I am committed to
+the doctrine of affinities. It is true that I, like many others,
+was guilty of the usual folly in my youth, and perhaps that gave
+me the wisdom to wait for my second venture until precisely the
+fight party came along. Matrimony, Bunsey, is an exact science.
+If we regulate our passion, control all silly emotion, study
+feminine nature as critically and methodically as we investigate
+a mathematical problem, and commit ourselves only when the
+affinity presents herself, we shall make no mistakes. For, after
+all, what is an affinity? Nothing more than a human being sent by
+Providence as perfectly adapted to the wheels and curves of your
+nature."
+
+"A very pretty theory," retorted Bunsey, grimly; "and, by the
+way, when do you think of rushing into matrimony?"
+
+"Really," I said, somewhat confused, "to be entirely honest with
+you, I have not settled on any particular day. You see Phyllis
+should have her fling. She is very young."
+
+"True, but you are not."
+
+As Bunsey said this he rose and tossed his cigar out of the
+window. "Stanhope," he went on, "we are old friends, and I don't
+wish to be continually seeming to interfere with your business,
+but if I were a man with fifty years leering hideously at me, and
+engaged to a pretty girl of two and twenty, I'd make quick work
+of it before Providence came along with a younger affinity in a
+Panama hat, negligee shirt, and duck trousers."
+
+I stared at him with a sort of helpless amazement. "Exactly what
+do you mean?" I asked.
+
+"Well," he answered, shrugging his shoulders, "at the risk of
+being kicked out of the house, let me say that I think such an
+affinity has already presented himself."
+
+"Indeed, and who may that be?"
+
+"Suppose we say Frederick."
+
+"My nephew?"
+
+"Exactly; your nephew. He is an uncommonly good-looking fellow,
+and, thanks to his uncle's childlike belief in Providence and
+the doctrine of affinities, he has most unusual opportunities to
+test that doctrine for himself. I dare say that he is making a
+formal study of the situation at this very moment, and inviting
+Providence to appear on the scene as his sponsor."
+
+What more was said at this interview, if, indeed, it did
+not terminate with this brutal statement, I cannot recall,
+for Bunsey, usually so flippant and cynical, spoke with an
+earnestness that stunned me. My knowledge of the philosophy of
+love told me that he was wrong; my observation of the actualities
+of life made me fear that he might be right. Theoretically, I
+could not have been mistaken in my course; practically, I began
+to see weak spots in the chain of evidence. Swiftly, I ran over
+the events of the spring and summer, and as little spots no
+bigger than a man's hand magnified themselves into black clouds,
+Bunsey, sitting opposite, seemed to grow larger and larger, and
+his smile more malicious and demon-like. Possibly, had I been a
+younger and more impetuous man, I should have flown into a
+passion, taken Bunsey at his word, and kicked him out of the
+house; but the philosophy of the thing engrossed me, filled me
+with half fear, half curiosity, and engaged all my mental
+faculties. Had I been mistaken? Could I be deceived in the
+daughter of Sylvia?
+
+However strong my suspicions may have been, they were not
+increased when, with the evening, Phyllis and Frederick came home
+from their excursion. Never was Phyllis more unreserved, more
+cordial, more joyous, more attentive to the little wants, which
+I, in a mean and shameful test, imposed on her. She could not be
+acting a part, this New England girl, with her alert conscience,
+her Puritan impulse and training, her aversion to everything that
+savored of deceit. And Frederick was as much at his ease as if I
+knew nothing, as if I had not heard of his duplicity, as if the
+whole house and grounds were not ringing with accusations of his
+unworthiness. Such are the phenomena of the philosophy of middle
+life, I insisted that he should remain for the evening, and,
+after dinner, with that contrariness accountable only in a true
+student of psychology, I made a trifling excuse and walked down
+to the square, leaving them together.
+
+The curfew was ringing as, returning, I entered the lower gate at
+the end of the garden, and passed slowly along by the arbor. It
+may have been Providence, it may have been chance, it certainly
+was not philosophy that directed my steps to the far side of the
+syringa hedge which shut me off from the view of those who might
+come down to the rustic seat at the foot of the cherry tree. At
+least I had no intention of playing the spy, and when I heard
+Frederick's voice, and knew instinctively that Phyllis was with
+him, I quickened my pace that I might not be a sharer of their
+secrets. But an irresistible impulse made me pause when I heard
+the foolish fellow say:
+
+"After to-night I shall not come again. It is better for us to
+break now than to wait until it is too late."
+
+Her reply I could not hear. Presently he said, and a little
+brokenly:
+
+"I have fought it all out. It has been hard, so hard, but I must
+meet it as it comes."
+
+Then I heard Phyllis's voice: "It is for the best."
+
+"I believe that you care for me. I know how much I care for you,
+and how much this effort is costing me. We were too late. No
+other course in honor presents itself. God knows how eagerly and
+hopelessly I have sought a way out of this tangle of duty."
+
+Again I heard Phyllis's voice, sunk almost to a whisper: "I have
+given my word; it is for the best."
+
+"The governor has been so good to me," Frederick exclaimed
+resentfully, "that I feel like a criminal even at this moment
+when I am making for him the sacrifice of a life. He has been my
+father, my protector. What I am I owe to him, and I must meet him
+like a grateful and honest man. You would not have it otherwise?"
+
+And for the third time Phyllis answered: "It is for the best."
+
+Had I been of that remarkable stuff of which your true hero is
+made, of which Bunsey's heroes are made, and had I come up to the
+very reasonable expectations of the followers of literary
+romance, I should have burst through the syringa with passion in
+my face and rage in my heart and precipitated a tragedy. Or, on
+the other side, I should have taken those ridiculous children by
+the hand, and ended their suffering with my blessing then and
+there. But as I am only of very common clay, with little liking
+for heroics, I did what any selfish and unappreciative man would
+have done, and stole quietly away. I even felt a sort of fierce
+joy in the knowledge of the security of my position, a mean
+exultation in the thought that Phyllis was bound to me, and that
+those from whom I might reasonably fear the most, acknowledged
+the hopelessness of their case. Most strangely there came to me
+no resentment with the knowledge that I had been supplanted by my
+nephew in the affections of the girl; the fact that she loved
+another surprised rather than agitated me. My argument was upset,
+my doctrine of affinities had been seriously damaged in my
+individual case, and here was I, who should have been yielding to
+the pangs of disappointment, or raging with wounded pride,
+reflecting with considerable calmness on the reverses of a
+philosopher.
+
+I went into the library and lighted a cigar. I threw myself into
+an easy-chair, and as I looked up I saw a spider-web in a corner
+of the ceiling. "I must speak to Prudence about that in the
+morning," I said to myself with annoyance. Then for the first
+time it came to me that I was out of temper, for I am customarily
+tranquil and not easily upset. My mind wandered rapidly from one
+thing to another, and oddly enough I caught myself humming a
+little tune which had no sort of relevancy to the events of the
+day. I tried to dismiss the incident of the garden as the
+temporary folly of a romantic girl, which would wear itself out
+with a week's absence. Why should it trouble me? Had I been
+lacking in kindness or affection? Should I be disturbed because a
+few boat rides and the influence of moonlight had wrought on a
+mere child? Was I not secure in her promise, and had I not heard
+her say she had given her word? As for Frederick, was he not my
+debtor? Had he not confessed it? Then why give more thought to
+the matter? It was awkward, but both were young and both would
+outlive it. Sylvia and I were young, and we outlived it.
+
+But still kept ringing in my ears that despairing half-whisper:
+"It is for the best."
+
+Petulantly I threw away my cigar and went up to my room. I walked
+over to the dressing-case and turned up the gas. The shadow
+displeased me and I lighted the opposite jet. Then I stood
+squarely before the mirror and looked critically at the
+reflection.
+
+Yes, John Stanhope, you are growing old. That expanding forehead,
+with the retreating hairs, tells the tale of time. The gray upon
+your cheeks is whitening and the razor must be used more
+vigilantly to further deception. Those creases in your face can
+no longer be dismissed as character lines; the shagginess of your
+eyebrows has the flying years to account for it. Plainly, John,
+you and humbug must part company. You are not of this generation
+and it is not for you.
+
+I turned down the gas, threw open the window and let the
+moonlight filter in through the elms and over the tops of the
+little pines. The soft beauty of the night soothed me, and
+gradually and very gently my irritation and annoyance slipped
+away. Why should not a young girl, radiant in youth and beauty,
+affect a young man of her generation? What has an old fellow,
+with all his money and worldly experience and burnt-out youth, to
+give in exchange for that intoxication which every girl may
+properly regard her lawful gift? Undoubtedly I should make a
+better husband, as husbands go, than my romantic nephew, and any
+woman of rare common sense would see the advantages of my
+position, but why burden a woman with that rare common sense
+which robs her of the first and sweetest of her dreams? No, John
+Stanhope, go back to your pipe and your books and your gardening,
+your life of selfish, indolent do-nothing. Take life as it comes
+most easily and naturally. By sparing one heart you may save two.
+
+And that nephew of mine--what a fine, manly fellow he proved
+himself when put to the test! The governor had been good to him
+and he was going to stand by the governor. How my heart jumped,
+and what a warm little feeling there was about the internal
+cockles as I recalled his words. Bravely said, my boy, and nobly
+done! I fear I should not have been so generous at your age, and
+with Sylvia--
+
+And with Sylvia! How the past crowded back at the thought of her!
+Who are you, old dreamer, who neglected the gift the good gods
+provided in the heydey of your youth to return to chase the
+phantom of the past? Behind that little white cloud, sailing far
+into the north, Sylvia may be peeping at you, and smiling at the
+delusion of her ancient wooer. Or why not think that she is
+pleading with you--pleading for her child and the lover, as she
+might have pleaded for herself and somebody else, had somebody
+else known his own heart before it was too late?
+
+I watched the white cloud as it passed on and on, growing smaller
+and fainter as it receded. I settled back still deeper in my
+chair and sighed. And then--O unworthy knight of love!--and then,
+I fell asleep.
+
+
+
+
+In the morning, before the family was astir, I wrote a note,
+pleading a sudden and imperative call to town, and vanished for
+the day. I argued with myself that such a step was a delicate
+consideration for a young woman, who, having listened to a
+confession of love a few hours before, would be hardly at her
+ease at a breakfast-table conversation. Incidentally I was not
+altogether sure of myself, although I was much refreshed by an
+excellent night's sleep which comes to every philosopher with
+courage and strength to rise above the unpleasant things of life.
+If Phyllis had yielded to an emotion of grief, there was little
+trace of it when we met at evening. I fancied that she was
+somewhat paler, and her manner at times seemed a little listless,
+but otherwise there was no great departure from her usual
+demeanor. As for myself the long sunshine of a summer day and the
+conviction that at last the opportunity had come to me to play
+the role of a minor hero gave me a peace that amounted almost to
+buoyancy. No need had I of the teachings of the musty old
+philosophers reposing on my bookshelves. John Stanhope had
+learned more of life in a few short hours than all his tomes
+could impart. His books had helped him many times in diagnosing
+the cases of his friends; when John fell ill they mocked and
+deceived him.
+
+Opportunely enough Phyllis followed me into the library, and when
+at my request she sat on a little stool at my feet, and I held
+her hand and stroked her soft light hair, a pang went through my
+heart, for I felt that she might be near me for the last time.
+The philosopher had yet much to learn. For several minutes we
+were both silent. Of the two I was doubtless the more ill at
+ease, though I concealed it bravely.
+
+"Phyllis," I said at last, "did you ever get over a childish
+fondness for fairy-stories?"
+
+She smiled at this--was I wrong in fancying that her smile was
+that of sadness?--and answered: "I hope not."
+
+"Because," I went on, bending over and affectionately patting the
+hand I held, "a little fairy-tale has been running through my
+head all day, and I have decided that you shall be the first to
+hear it and pass on its merits. And because," I added gayly, "if
+it has your approval I may wish to publish it. Shall I begin?"
+
+She nodded her head--I could swear now to the weariness the poor
+child was so staunchly fighting--and looked off toward the
+sunset.
+
+"Once upon a time--you see that I am conventional--there lived a
+beautiful young princess, on whom a wicked old troll had cast an
+evil eye. Now this wicked troll was not so hideous as the trolls
+we see in our fairy-books--I must say that--but he was so wicked
+that even this deficiency could not excuse him. The princess was
+as young and innocent--I was going to say as simple--as she was
+beautiful, and the wicked troll talked so much of his experience
+in the world, and boasted so hugely of his wealth and generosity
+and other shining virtues, that the imagination of the poor
+little princess was quite fired, and she was flattered into
+thinking that here was a treasure not to be lightly put aside.
+And so, in a foolish moment she consented to be his bride, and he
+took her away to his castle--I believe trolls do have castles--to
+make ready for the marriage. While the preparations were going
+on, and the wicked old troll was laughing with glee to think how
+he had deluded a princess, a handsome young prince appeared on
+the scene, and what so natural as that the princess should
+immediately contrast him with the troll. And it came about, also
+quite naturally, that before the prince and the princess knew
+that anything was happening, they fell so violently in love with
+each other that the birds, and the bees, and the flowers in the
+garden, and the squirrels in the trees sang and hummed and
+gossiped and chattered about it."
+
+Here I paused. Phyllis did not look up, but I felt a shiver run
+through her body as I stroked her hair and put my arm around her
+shoulder to caress away her fear.
+
+"But it happened that although the princess was so much in love
+that at times she must have forgotten even the existence of the
+old troll, she was still possessed of that most inconvenient and
+annoying internal arrangement which we call the New England
+conscience, and one night, when the prince had declared his love
+with more ardor than usual, she remembered the past, how she had
+promised to marry the troll, and how she must keep her word, as
+all good princesses do. And the prince, who was a very upright
+young man, most foolishly listened to her, and agreed to give her
+up. Whereupon these poor children, having resolved that it was
+for the best--"
+
+Phyllis looked up quickly. Her face was white, and a look, half
+of fear, half of reproach, came to her eyes. She sank down and
+hid her face in her hands. Both my arms were around her and I
+even laughed.
+
+"Dear little princess," I whispered, "don't give way yet. The
+best is still to come. For you must remember that this is a
+fairy-tale and all fairy-tales have a good ending. And, to make a
+long story short, this wicked old troll was not a troll at all,
+but a fairy-godmother, who had taken the form for good purposes.
+I would have said fairy-godfather, but I have never come across a
+fairy-godfather in all my reading, and I must be truthful. Well,
+the fairy-godmother came along right in the nick of time--and, of
+course, you know who married and lived happily ever after?"
+
+The convulsive movement of the poor child's body told me she
+was weeping. And I, being a philosopher, and more or less
+hard-hearted, as all philosophers are, let her weep on. Presently
+she said in a voice hardly audible:
+
+"I gave you my promise and I meant to keep it. I am trying so
+hard to keep it."
+
+"Of course you are, little girl, but why try? A bad promise is
+far better broken than kept, and, come to think of it, I am not
+at all sure that I am anxious to have you keep it. How do you
+know that I am not making a desperate effort to secure my own
+release?"
+
+She raised her head quite unexpectedly and caught me with the
+tears in my eyes. My eyes always were weak. "Why, you are
+crying!" she said.
+
+"Of course I'm crying. I always cry when I am particularly well
+pleased. It is a family peculiarity. You should see me at the
+theatre. At a farce comedy I am a depressing sight, and that is
+the reason I always avoid the front seats."
+
+Then realizing that I might be carrying my gayety too far, I went
+on more soberly:
+
+"Can't you see, Phyllis, that the old fool's romance must come to
+an end? Don't you understand that had I the selfish wish to hold
+you to a thoughtless promise, our adventure would terminate only
+in misery to us both? Perhaps you and I have been the last to see
+it, I, because I was thinking too much of myself, you, because
+you were carried away by an exalted sense of duty. Thank heaven
+it is clear to us both now. For it is clear, isn't it, dear?"
+
+The foolish girl did not reply, but she kissed my hand, and it is
+astonishing how that little act of affection touched and
+strengthened me.
+
+"So we are going to make a new start and begin right. To-morrow I
+shall see Frederick and make a proposition to him, and if that
+rascal does not give up his heroics and come down to his plain
+duty as I see it--well, so much the worse for him. No, don't
+raise objections"--she had started to speak--"for I am always
+quarrelsome when I cannot have my own way. Go to your room and
+think it over, and remember," I said more gently, for that old
+tide of the past was coming in, "that you are Sylvia's daughter,
+and that Sylvia would have trusted me and counselled you to obey
+me in all things."
+
+Slowly and with averted face Phyllis rose and walked toward the
+door. I had commanded her, and yet I felt a sharp pang of
+bitterness that she had yielded so quickly to my words. It seemed
+at the moment that everything was passing out of my life; that
+Phyllis, that Sylvia, that all the once sweet, continuous memory
+was lost to me forever. I could not call her back, and I could
+not hope that she would return. Philosopher that I was I could
+not explain the sinking and the fear that took possession of me.
+The philosopher did not know himself. All his thought and all his
+reasoning could not solve the simple riddle the quick intuition
+of a girl made clear.
+
+She had reached the door before she paused. Then she turned. I
+had risen mechanically and stood looking at her. As slowly she
+came back and waited as if for me to speak. And when the dull
+philosopher groped helplessly for words and could not meet the
+appealing eyes, she put her hands on his shoulders, and laid her
+warm, young face on his heart, and said, "Father!"
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The night was peacefully beautiful. I had strolled out of the
+garden and down to the river, and there along the bridle-path on
+the winding bank I walked for miles. Absorbed in my own thoughts
+I gave no heed to my little dog, Hero, trotting at my side and
+looking anxiously up at me with her large brown eyes, as if
+saying in her dog fashion: "Don't worry, old man; I'm here!" A
+strange, inexplicable happiness had fallen to him who thought he
+knew all others, and did not know even himself. I crossed the
+river to return on the opposite shore, and all the way back,
+through the arching trees, the shadows danced in the moonlight
+and the crickets chirped merrily. Life seemed so contrary, so
+bewildering, for I thought of the wedding music in those early
+mornings at my boyhood home, and I wondered at the optimism of
+Nature in attuning all emotions to a joyous note.
+
+Again in my garden I saw a half-light in Phyllis's room. Coming
+nearer I saw that she was standing at the window, with the same
+cloud on her face that had betrayed the battle with her
+conscience. At sight of her all the joyous emotion of my new
+tenderness overwhelmed me and I cried out cheerily:
+
+"Good-night, Phyllis!"
+
+Something in my voice sent a smile to her eyes and gladness to
+her heart, as, half leaning from the window, she kissed her hand
+to me and called back softly: "Good-night, father dear!"
+
+The south wind came, bringing the scent of the rose and the
+honeysuckle, and stirring the drowsy branches of the elms. The
+river rippled merrily in the moonlight, hurrying to bear the
+tidings of happiness to the greater waters, and off in the
+distance the blue hills lifted their heads above the haze. Toward
+the north scudded the friendly little white cloud, and it seemed
+again a soothing fancy that Sylvia--
+
+O sweet and pleasant world!
+
+
+
+
+TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES
+
+Page 103: Changed housekeeper to house-keeper for consistency.
+
+Page 116: Changed typo "effervesence" to "effervescence."
+
+Page 142: Changed typo "moolight" to "moonlight."
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg's The Romance of an Old Fool, by Roswell Field
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