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+The Project Gutenberg eBook of Cabbages and Kings, by O. Henry
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
+most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
+of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
+will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
+using this eBook.
+
+Title: Cabbages and Kings
+
+Author: O. Henry
+
+Release Date: July 23, 2000 [eBook #2777]
+[Most recently updated: February 2, 2022]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+Produced by: Earle C. Beach and Joseph E. Loewenstein, M.D.
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CABBAGES AND KINGS ***
+
+[Illustration]
+
+[Illustration]
+“A little saint with a color more lightful than orange”
+
+
+
+
+CABBAGES AND KINGS
+
+by O. HENRY
+
+
+_Author of “The Four Million,” “The Voice of the
+City,” “The Trimmed Lamp,” “Strictly Business,”
+“Whirligigs,” Etc._
+
+
+
+
+ “The time has come,” the Walrus said,
+ “To talk of many things;
+ Of shoes and ships and sealing-wax,
+ And cabbages and kings.”
+
+ THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER
+
+
+Contents
+
+ THE PROEM BY THE CARPENTER
+ I. “FOX-IN-THE-MORNING”
+ II. THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE
+ III. SMITH
+ IV. CAUGHT
+ V. CUPID’S EXILE NUMBER TWO
+ VI. THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT
+ VII. MONEY MAZE
+ VIII. THE ADMIRAL
+ IX. THE FLAG PARAMOUNT
+ X. THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM
+ XI. THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE
+ XII. SHOES
+ XIII. SHIPS
+ XIV. MASTERS OF ARTS
+ XV. DICKY
+ XVI. ROUGE ET NOIR
+ XVII. TWO RECALLS
+ XVIII. THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE
+
+
+
+
+THE PROEM
+BY THE CARPENTER
+
+
+They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that
+volatile republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio;
+that he had reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of an
+imminent revolution; and that one hundred thousand dollars, government
+funds, which he carried with him in an American leather valise as a
+souvenir of his tempestuous administration, was never afterward
+recovered.
+
+For a _real_, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town
+near a little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of wood
+stands at its head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with a hot
+iron this inscription:
+
+RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES
+Y MIRAFLORES
+PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA
+DE ANCHURIA
+QUE SEA SU JUEZ DIOS
+
+
+It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man
+beyond the grave. “Let God be his judge!”—Even with the hundred
+thousand unfound, though greatly coveted, the hue and cry went no
+further than that.
+
+To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the
+story of the tragic end of their former president; how he strove to
+escape from the country with the public funds and also with Doña Isabel
+Guilbert, the young American opera singer; and how, being apprehended
+by members of the opposing political party in Coralio, he shot himself
+through the head rather than give up the funds, and, in consequence,
+the Señorita Guilbert. They will relate further that Doña Isabel, her
+adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the simultaneous loss of her
+distinguished admirer and the souvenir hundred thousand, dropped anchor
+on this stagnant coast, awaiting a rising tide.
+
+They say, in Coralio, that she found a prompt and prosperous tide in
+the form of Frank Goodwin, an American resident of the town, an
+investor who had grown wealthy by dealing in the products of the
+country—a banana king, a rubber prince, a sarsaparilla, indigo, and
+mahogany baron. The Señorita Guilbert, you will be told, married Señor
+Goodwin one month after the president’s death, thus, in the very moment
+when Fortune had ceased to smile, wresting from her a gift greater than
+the prize withdrawn.
+
+Of the American, Don Frank Goodwin, and of his wife the natives have
+nothing but good to say. Don Frank has lived among them for years, and
+has compelled their respect. His lady is easily queen of what social
+life the sober coast affords. The wife of the governor of the district,
+herself, who was of the proud Castilian family of Monteleon y Dolorosa
+de los Santos y Mendez, feels honoured to unfold her napkin with
+olive-hued, ringed hands at the table of Señora Goodwin. Were you to
+refer (with your northern prejudices) to the vivacious past of Mrs.
+Goodwin when her audacious and gleeful abandon in light opera captured
+the mature president’s fancy, or to her share in that statesman’s
+downfall and malfeasance, the Latin shrug of the shoulder would be your
+only answer and rebuttal. What prejudices there were in Coralio
+concerning Señora Goodwin seemed now to be in her favour, whatever they
+had been in the past.
+
+It would seem that the story is ended, instead of begun; that the close
+of tragedy and the climax of a romance have covered the ground of
+interest; but, to the more curious reader it shall be some slight
+instruction to trace the close threads that underlie the ingenuous web
+of circumstances.
+
+The headpiece bearing the name of President Miraflores is daily
+scrubbed with soap-bark and sand. An old half-breed Indian tends the
+grave with fidelity and the dawdling minuteness of inherited sloth. He
+chops down the weeds and ever-springing grass with his machete, he
+plucks ants and scorpions and beetles from it with his horny fingers,
+and sprinkles its turf with water from the plaza fountain. There is no
+grave anywhere so well kept and ordered.
+
+Only by following out the underlying threads will it be made clear why
+the old Indian, Galvez, is secretly paid to keep green the grave of
+President Miraflores by one who never saw that unfortunate statesman in
+life or in death, and why that one was wont to walk in the twilight,
+casting from a distance looks of gentle sadness upon that unhonoured
+mound.
+
+Elsewhere than at Coralio one learns of the impetuous career of Isabel
+Guilbert. New Orleans gave her birth and the mingled French and Spanish
+creole nature that tinctured her life with such turbulence and warmth.
+She had little education, but a knowledge of men and motives that
+seemed to have come by instinct. Far beyond the common woman was she
+endowed with intrepid rashness, with a love for the pursuit of
+adventure to the brink of danger, and with desire for the pleasures of
+life. Her spirit was one to chafe under any curb; she was Eve after the
+fall, but before the bitterness of it was felt. She wore life as a rose
+in her bosom.
+
+Of the legion of men who had been at her feet it was said that but one
+was so fortunate as to engage her fancy. To President Miraflores, the
+brilliant but unstable ruler of Anchuria, she yielded the key to her
+resolute heart. How, then, do we find her (as the Coralians would have
+told you) the wife of Frank Goodwin, and happily living a life of dull
+and dreamy inaction?
+
+The underlying threads reach far, stretching across the sea. Following
+them out it will be made plain why “Shorty” O’Day, of the Columbia
+Detective Agency, resigned his position. And, for a lighter pastime, it
+shall be a duty and a pleasing sport to wander with Momus beneath the
+tropic stars where Melpomene once stalked austere. Now to cause
+laughter to echo from those lavish jungles and frowning crags where
+formerly rang the cries of pirates’ victims; to lay aside pike and
+cutlass and attack with quip and jollity; to draw one saving titter of
+mirth from the rusty casque of Romance—this were pleasant to do in the
+shade of the lemon-trees on that coast that is curved like lips set for
+smiling.
+
+For there are yet tales of the Spanish Main. That segment of continent
+washed by the tempestuous Caribbean, and presenting to the sea a
+formidable border of tropical jungle topped by the overweening
+Cordilleras, is still begirt by mystery and romance. In past times
+buccaneers and revolutionists roused the echoes of its cliffs, and the
+condor wheeled perpetually above where, in the green groves, they made
+food for him with their matchlocks and toledos. Taken and retaken by
+sea rovers, by adverse powers and by sudden uprising of rebellious
+factions, the historic 300 miles of adventurous coast has scarcely
+known for hundreds of years whom rightly to call its master. Pizarro,
+Balboa, Sir Francis Drake, and Bolivar did what they could to make it a
+part of Christendom. Sir John Morgan, Lafitte and other eminent
+swash-bucklers bombarded and pounded it in the name of Abaddon.
+
+The game still goes on. The guns of the rovers are silenced; but the
+tintype man, the enlarged photograph brigand, the kodaking tourist and
+the scouts of the gentle brigade of fakirs have found it out, and carry
+on the work. The hucksters of Germany, France, and Sicily now bag its
+small change across their counters. Gentleman adventurers throng the
+waiting-rooms of its rulers with proposals for railways and
+concessions. The little _opéra-bouffe_ nations play at government and
+intrigue until some day a big, silent gunboat glides into the offing
+and warns them not to break their toys. And with these changes comes
+also the small adventurer, with empty pockets to fill, light of heart,
+busy-brained—the modern fairy prince, bearing an alarm clock with
+which, more surely than by the sentimental kiss, to awaken the
+beautiful tropics from their centuries’ sleep. Generally he wears a
+shamrock, which he matches pridefully against the extravagant palms;
+and it is he who has driven Melpomene to the wings, and set Comedy to
+dancing before the footlights of the Southern Cross.
+
+So, there is a little tale to tell of many things. Perhaps to the
+promiscuous ear of the Walrus it shall come with most avail; for in it
+there are indeed shoes and ships and sealing-wax and cabbage-palms and
+presidents instead of kings.
+
+Add to these a little love and counterplotting, and scatter everywhere
+throughout the maze a trail of tropical dollars—dollars warmed no more
+by the torrid sun than by the hot palms of the scouts of Fortune—and,
+after all, here seems to be Life, itself, with talk enough to weary the
+most garrulous of Walruses.
+
+
+
+
+I
+“FOX-IN-THE-MORNING”
+
+
+Coralio reclined, in the mid-day heat, like some vacuous beauty
+lounging in a guarded harem. The town lay at the sea’s edge on a strip
+of alluvial coast. It was set like a little pearl in an emerald band.
+Behind it, and seeming almost to topple, imminent, above it, rose the
+sea-following range of the Cordilleras. In front the sea was spread, a
+smiling jailer, but even more incorruptible than the frowning
+mountains. The waves swished along the smooth beach; the parrots
+screamed in the orange and ceiba-trees; the palms waved their limber
+fronds foolishly like an awkward chorus at the prima donna’s cue to
+enter.
+
+Suddenly the town was full of excitement. A native boy dashed down a
+grass-grown street, shrieking: “_Busca el Señor Goodwin. Ha venido un
+telégrafo por el!_”
+
+The word passed quickly. Telegrams do not often come to anyone in
+Coralio. The cry for Señor Goodwin was taken up by a dozen officious
+voices. The main street running parallel to the beach became populated
+with those who desired to expedite the delivery of the despatch. Knots
+of women with complexions varying from palest olive to deepest brown
+gathered at street corners and plaintively carolled: “_Un telégrafo por
+Señor Goodwin!_” The _comandante_, Don Señor el Coronel Encarnación
+Rios, who was loyal to the Ins and suspected Goodwin’s devotion to the
+Outs, hissed: “Aha!” and wrote in his secret memorandum book the
+accusive fact that Señor Goodwin had on that momentous date received a
+telegram.
+
+In the midst of the hullabaloo a man stepped to the door of a small
+wooden building and looked out. Above the door was a sign that read
+“Keogh and Clancy”—a nomenclature that seemed not to be indigenous to
+that tropical soil. The man in the door was Billy Keogh, scout of
+fortune and progress and latter-day rover of the Spanish Main. Tintypes
+and photographs were the weapons with which Keogh and Clancy were at
+that time assailing the hopeless shores. Outside the shop were set two
+large frames filled with specimens of their art and skill.
+
+Keogh leaned in the doorway, his bold and humorous countenance wearing
+a look of interest at the unusual influx of life and sound into the
+street. When the meaning of the disturbance became clear to him he
+placed a hand beside his mouth and shouted: “Hey! Frank!” in such a
+robustious voice that the feeble clamour of the natives was drowned and
+silenced.
+
+Fifty yards away, on the seaward side of the street, stood the abode of
+the consul for the United States. Out from the door of this building
+tumbled Goodwin at the call. He had been smoking with Willard Geddie,
+the consul, on the back porch of the consulate, which was conceded to
+be the coolest spot in Coralio.
+
+“Hurry up,” shouted Keogh. “There’s a riot in town on account of a
+telegram that’s come for you. You want to be careful about these
+things, my boy. It won’t do to trifle with the feelings of the public
+this way. You’ll be getting a pink note some day with violet scent on
+it; and then the country’ll be steeped in the throes of a revolution.”
+
+Goodwin had strolled up the street and met the boy with the message.
+The ox-eyed women gazed at him with shy admiration, for his type drew
+them. He was big, blonde, and jauntily dressed in white linen, with
+buckskin _zapatos_. His manner was courtly, with a sort of kindly
+truculence in it, tempered by a merciful eye. When the telegram had
+been delivered, and the bearer of it dismissed with a gratuity, the
+relieved populace returned to the contiguities of shade from which
+curiosity had drawn it—the women to their baking in the mud ovens under
+the orange-trees, or to the interminable combing of their long,
+straight hair; the men to their cigarettes and gossip in the cantinas.
+
+Goodwin sat on Keogh’s doorstep, and read his telegram. It was from Bob
+Englehart, an American, who lived in San Mateo, the capital city of
+Anchuria, eighty miles in the interior. Englehart was a gold miner, an
+ardent revolutionist and “good people.” That he was a man of resource
+and imagination was proven by the telegram he had sent. It had been his
+task to send a confidential message to his friend in Coralio. This
+could not have been accomplished in either Spanish or English, for the
+eye politic in Anchuria was an active one. The Ins and the Outs were
+perpetually on their guard. But Englehart was a diplomatist. There
+existed but one code upon which he might make requisition with promise
+of safety—the great and potent code of Slang. So, here is the message
+that slipped, unconstrued, through the fingers of curious officials,
+and came to the eye of Goodwin:
+
+His Nibs skedaddled yesterday per jack-rabbit line with all the coin in
+the kitty and the bundle of muslin he’s spoony about. The boodle is six
+figures short. Our crowd in good shape, but we need the spondulicks.
+You collar it. The main guy and the dry goods are headed for the briny.
+You know what to do.
+
+
+BOB.
+
+
+This screed, remarkable as it was, had no mystery for Goodwin. He was
+the most successful of the small advance-guard of speculative Americans
+that had invaded Anchuria, and he had not reached that enviable
+pinnacle without having well exercised the arts of foresight and
+deduction. He had taken up political intrigue as a matter of business.
+He was acute enough to wield a certain influence among the leading
+schemers, and he was prosperous enough to be able to purchase the
+respect of the petty office-holders. There was always a revolutionary
+party; and to it he had always allied himself; for the adherents of a
+new administration received the rewards of their labours. There was now
+a Liberal party seeking to overturn President Miraflores. If the wheel
+successfully revolved, Goodwin stood to win a concession to 30,000
+manzanas of the finest coffee lands in the interior. Certain incidents
+in the recent career of President Miraflores had excited a shrewd
+suspicion in Goodwin’s mind that the government was near a dissolution
+from another cause than that of a revolution, and now Englehart’s
+telegram had come as a corroboration of his wisdom.
+
+The telegram, which had remained unintelligible to the Anchurian
+linguists who had applied to it in vain their knowledge of Spanish and
+elemental English, conveyed a stimulating piece of news to Goodwin’s
+understanding. It informed him that the president of the republic had
+decamped from the capital city with the contents of the treasury.
+Furthermore, that he was accompanied in his flight by that winning
+adventuress Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer, whose troupe of
+performers had been entertained by the president at San Mateo during
+the past month on a scale less modest than that with which royal
+visitors are often content. The reference to the “jack-rabbit line”
+could mean nothing else than the mule-back system of transport that
+prevailed between Coralio and the capital. The hint that the “boodle”
+was “six figures short” made the condition of the national treasury
+lamentably clear. Also it was convincingly true that the ingoing
+party—its way now made a pacific one—would need the “spondulicks.”
+Unless its pledges should be fulfilled, and the spoils held for the
+delectation of the victors, precarious indeed, would be the position of
+the new government. Therefore it was exceeding necessary to “collar the
+main guy,” and recapture the sinews of war and government.
+
+Goodwin handed the message to Keogh.
+
+“Read that, Billy,” he said. “It’s from Bob Englehart. Can you manage
+the cipher?”
+
+Keogh sat in the other half of the doorway, and carefully perused the
+telegram.
+
+“’Tis not a cipher,” he said, finally. “’Tis what they call literature,
+and that’s a system of language put in the mouths of people that
+they’ve never been introduced to by writers of imagination. The
+magazines invented it, but I never knew before that President Norvin
+Green had stamped it with the seal of his approval. ’Tis now no longer
+literature, but language. The dictionaries tried, but they couldn’t
+make it go for anything but dialect. Sure, now that the Western Union
+indorses it, it won’t be long till a race of people will spring up that
+speaks it.”
+
+“You’re running too much to philology, Billy,” said Goodwin. “Do you
+make out the meaning of it?”
+
+“Sure,” replied the philosopher of Fortune. “All languages come easy to
+the man who must know ’em. I’ve even failed to misunderstand an order
+to evacuate in classical Chinese when it was backed up by the muzzle of
+a breech-loader. This little literary essay I hold in my hands means a
+game of Fox-in-the-Morning. Ever play that, Frank, when you was a kid?”
+
+“I think so,” said Goodwin, laughing. “You join hands all ’round, and—”
+
+“You do not,” interrupted Keogh. “You’ve got a fine sporting game mixed
+up in your head with ‘All Around the Rosebush.’ The spirit of
+‘Fox-in-the-Morning’ is opposed to the holding of hands. I’ll tell you
+how it’s played. This president man and his companion in play, they
+stand up over in San Mateo, ready for the run, and shout:
+‘Fox-in-the-Morning!’ Me and you, standing here, we say: ‘Goose and the
+Gander!’ They say: ‘How many miles is it to London town?’ We say: ‘Only
+a few, if your legs are long enough. How many comes out?’ They say:
+‘More than you’re able to catch.’ And then the game commences.”
+
+“I catch the idea,” said Goodwin. “It won’t do to let the goose and
+gander slip through our fingers, Billy; their feathers are too
+valuable. Our crowd is prepared and able to step into the shoes of the
+government at once; but with the treasury empty we’d stay in power
+about as long as a tenderfoot would stick on an untamed bronco. We must
+play the fox on every foot of the coast to prevent their getting out of
+the country.”
+
+“By the mule-back schedule,” said Keogh, “it’s five days down from San
+Mateo. We’ve got plenty of time to set our outposts. There’s only three
+places on the coast where they can hope to sail from—here and Solitas
+and Alazan. They’re the only points we’ll have to guard. It’s as easy
+as a chess problem—fox to play, and mate in three moves. Oh, goosey,
+goosey, gander, whither do you wander? By the blessing of the literary
+telegraph the boodle of this benighted fatherland shall be preserved to
+the honest political party that is seeking to overthrow it.”
+
+The situation had been justly outlined by Keogh. The down trail from
+the capital was at all times a weary road to travel. A jiggety-joggety
+journey it was; ice-cold and hot, wet and dry. The trail climbed
+appalling mountains, wound like a rotten string about the brows of
+breathless precipices, plunged through chilling snow-fed streams, and
+wriggled like a snake through sunless forests teeming with menacing
+insect and animal life. After descending to the foothills it turned to
+a trident, the central prong ending at Alazan. Another branched off to
+Coralio; the third penetrated to Solitas. Between the sea and the
+foothills stretched the five miles breadth of alluvial coast. Here was
+the flora of the tropics in its rankest and most prodigal growth.
+Spaces here and there had been wrested from the jungle and planted with
+bananas and cane and orange groves. The rest was a riot of wild
+vegetation, the home of monkeys, tapirs, jaguars, alligators and
+prodigious reptiles and insects. Where no road was cut a serpent could
+scarcely make its way through the tangle of vines and creepers. Across
+the treacherous mangrove swamps few things without wings could safely
+pass. Therefore the fugitives could hope to reach the coast only by one
+of the routes named.
+
+“Keep the matter quiet, Billy,” advised Goodwin. “We don’t want the Ins
+to know that the president is in flight. I suppose Bob’s information is
+something of a scoop in the capital as yet. Otherwise he would not have
+tried to make his message a confidential one; and besides, everybody
+would have heard the news. I’m going around now to see Dr. Zavalla, and
+start a man up the trail to cut the telegraph wire.”
+
+As Goodwin rose, Keogh threw his hat upon the grass by the door and
+expelled a tremendous sigh.
+
+“What’s the trouble, Billy?” asked Goodwin, pausing. “That’s the first
+time I ever heard you sigh.”
+
+“’Tis the last,” said Keogh. “With that sorrowful puff of wind I resign
+myself to a life of praiseworthy but harassing honesty. What are
+tintypes, if you please, to the opportunities of the great and
+hilarious class of ganders and geese? Not that I would be a president,
+Frank—and the boodle he’s got is too big for me to handle—but in some
+ways I feel my conscience hurting me for addicting myself to
+photographing a nation instead of running away with it. Frank, did you
+ever see the ‘bundle of muslin’ that His Excellency has wrapped up and
+carried off?”
+
+“Isabel Guilbert?” said Goodwin, laughing. “No, I never did. From what
+I’ve heard of her, though, I imagine that she wouldn’t stick at
+anything to carry her point. Don’t get romantic, Billy. Sometimes I
+begin to fear that there’s Irish blood in your ancestry.”
+
+“I never saw her either,” went on Keogh; “but they say she’s got all
+the ladies of mythology, sculpture, and fiction reduced to chromos.
+They say she can look at a man once, and he’ll turn monkey and climb
+trees to pick cocoanuts for her. Think of that president man with Lord
+knows how many hundreds of thousands of dollars in one hand, and this
+muslin siren in the other, galloping down hill on a sympathetic mule
+amid songbirds and flowers! And here is Billy Keogh, because he is
+virtuous, condemned to the unprofitable swindle of slandering the faces
+of missing links on tin for an honest living! ’Tis an injustice of
+nature.”
+
+“Cheer up,” said Goodwin. “You are a pretty poor fox to be envying a
+gander. Maybe the enchanting Guilbert will take a fancy to you and your
+tintypes after we impoverish her royal escort.”
+
+“She could do worse,” reflected Keogh; “but she won’t. ’Tis not a
+tintype gallery, but the gallery of the gods that she’s fitted to
+adorn. She’s a very wicked lady, and the president man is in luck. But
+I hear Clancy swearing in the back room for having to do all the work.”
+And Keogh plunged for the rear of the “gallery,” whistling gaily in a
+spontaneous way that belied his recent sigh over the questionable good
+luck of the flying president.
+
+Goodwin turned from the main street into a much narrower one that
+intersected it at a right angle.
+
+These side streets were covered by a growth of thick, rank grass, which
+was kept to a navigable shortness by the machetes of the police. Stone
+sidewalks, little more than a ledge in width, ran along the base of the
+mean and monotonous adobe houses. At the outskirts of the village these
+streets dwindled to nothing; and here were set the palm-thatched huts
+of the Caribs and the poorer natives, and the shabby cabins of negroes
+from Jamaica and the West India islands. A few structures raised their
+heads above the red-tiled roofs of the one-story houses—the bell tower
+of the _Calaboza_, the Hotel de los Estranjeros, the residence of the
+Vesuvius Fruit Company’s agent, the store and residence of Bernard
+Brannigan, a ruined cathedral in which Columbus had once set foot, and,
+most imposing of all, the Casa Morena—the summer “White House” of the
+President of Anchuria. On the principal street running along the
+beach—the Broadway of Coralio—were the larger stores, the government
+_bodega_ and post-office, the _cuartel_, the rum-shops and the market
+place.
+
+On his way Goodwin passed the house of Bernard Brannigan. It was a
+modern wooden building, two stories in height. The ground floor was
+occupied by Brannigan’s store, the upper one contained the living
+apartments. A wide cool porch ran around the house half way up its
+outer walls. A handsome, vivacious girl neatly dressed in flowing white
+leaned over the railing and smiled down upon Goodwin. She was no darker
+than many an Andalusian of high descent; and she sparkled and glowed
+like a tropical moonlight.
+
+“Good evening, Miss Paula,” said Goodwin, taking off his hat, with his
+ready smile. There was little difference in his manner whether he
+addressed women or men. Everybody in Coralio liked to receive the
+salutation of the big American.
+
+“Is there any news, Mr. Goodwin? Please don’t say no. Isn’t it warm? I
+feel just like Mariana in her moated grange—or was it a range?—it’s hot
+enough.”
+
+“No, there’s no news to tell, I believe,” said Goodwin, with a
+mischievous look in his eye, “except that old Geddie is getting
+grumpier and crosser every day. If something doesn’t happen to relieve
+his mind I’ll have to quit smoking on his back porch—and there’s no
+other place available that is cool enough.”
+
+“He isn’t grumpy,” said Paula Brannigan, impulsively, “when he—”
+
+But she ceased suddenly, and drew back with a deepening colour; for her
+mother had been a _mestizo_ lady, and the Spanish blood had brought to
+Paula a certain shyness that was an adornment to the other half of her
+demonstrative nature.
+
+
+
+
+II
+THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE
+
+
+Willard Geddie, consul for the United States in Coralio, was working
+leisurely on his yearly report. Goodwin, who had strolled in as he did
+daily for a smoke on the much coveted porch, had found him so absorbed
+in his work that he departed after roundly abusing the consul for his
+lack of hospitality.
+
+“I shall complain to the civil service department,” said Goodwin;—“or
+is it a department?—perhaps it’s only a theory. One gets neither
+civility nor service from you. You won’t talk; and you won’t set out
+anything to drink. What kind of a way is that of representing your
+government?”
+
+Goodwin strolled out and across to the hotel to see if he could bully
+the quarantine doctor into a game on Coralio’s solitary billiard table.
+His plans were completed for the interception of the fugitives from the
+capital; and now it was but a waiting game that he had to play.
+
+The consul was interested in his report. He was only twenty-four; and
+he had not been in Coralio long enough for his enthusiasm to cool in
+the heat of the tropics—a paradox that may be allowed between Cancer
+and Capricorn.
+
+So many thousand bunches of bananas, so many thousand oranges and
+cocoanuts, so many ounces of gold dust, pounds of rubber, coffee,
+indigo and sarsaparilla—actually, exports were twenty per cent. greater
+than for the previous year!
+
+A little thrill of satisfaction ran through the consul. Perhaps, he
+thought, the State Department, upon reading his introduction, would
+notice—and then he leaned back in his chair and laughed. He was getting
+as bad as the others. For the moment he had forgotten that Coralio was
+an insignificant town in an insignificant republic lying along the
+by-ways of a second-rate sea. He thought of Gregg, the quarantine
+doctor, who subscribed for the London _Lancet_, expecting to find it
+quoting his reports to the home Board of Health concerning the yellow
+fever germ. The consul knew that not one in fifty of his acquaintances
+in the States had ever heard of Coralio. He knew that two men, at any
+rate, would have to read his report—some underling in the State
+Department and a compositor in the Public Printing Office. Perhaps the
+typesticker would note the increase of commerce in Coralio, and speak
+of it, over the cheese and beer, to a friend.
+
+He had just written: “Most unaccountable is the supineness of the large
+exporters in the United States in permitting the French and German
+houses to practically control the trade interests of this rich and
+productive country”—when he heard the hoarse notes of a steamer’s
+siren.
+
+Geddie laid down his pen and gathered his Panama hat and umbrella. By
+the sound he knew it to be the _Valhalla_, one of the line of fruit
+vessels plying for the Vesuvius Company. Down to _niños_ of five years,
+everyone in Coralio could name you each incoming steamer by the note of
+her siren.
+
+The consul sauntered by a roundabout, shaded way to the beach. By
+reason of long practice he gauged his stroll so accurately that by the
+time he arrived on the sandy shore the boat of the customs officials
+was rowing back from the steamer, which had been boarded and inspected
+according to the laws of Anchuria.
+
+There is no harbour at Coralio. Vessels of the draught of the
+_Valhalla_ must ride at anchor a mile from shore. When they take on
+fruit it is conveyed on lighters and freighter sloops. At Solitas,
+where there was a fine harbour, ships of many kinds were to be seen,
+but in the roadstead off Coralio scarcely any save the fruiters paused.
+Now and then a tramp coaster, or a mysterious brig from Spain, or a
+saucy French barque would hang innocently for a few days in the offing.
+Then the custom-house crew would become doubly vigilant and wary. At
+night a sloop or two would be making strange trips in and out along the
+shore; and in the morning the stock of Three-Star Hennessey, wines and
+drygoods in Coralio would be found vastly increased. It has also been
+said that the customs officials jingled more silver in the pockets of
+their red-striped trousers, and that the record books showed no
+increase in import duties received.
+
+The customs boat and the _Valhalla_ gig reached the shore at the same
+time. When they grounded in the shallow water there was still five
+yards of rolling surf between them and dry sand. Then half-clothed
+Caribs dashed into the water, and brought in on their backs the
+_Valhalla’s_ purser and the little native officials in their cotton
+undershirts, blue trousers with red stripes, and flapping straw hats.
+
+At college Geddie had been a treasure as a first-baseman. He now closed
+his umbrella, stuck it upright in the sand, and stooped, with his hands
+resting upon his knees. The purser, burlesquing the pitcher’s
+contortions, hurled at the consul the heavy roll of newspapers, tied
+with a string, that the steamer always brought for him. Geddie leaped
+high and caught the roll with a sounding “thwack.” The loungers on the
+beach—about a third of the population of the town—laughed and applauded
+delightedly. Every week they expected to see that roll of papers
+delivered and received in that same manner, and they were never
+disappointed. Innovations did not flourish in Coralio.
+
+The consul re-hoisted his umbrella and walked back to the consulate.
+
+This home of a great nation’s representative was a wooden structure of
+two rooms, with a native-built gallery of poles, bamboo and nipa palm
+running on three sides of it. One room was the official apartment,
+furnished chastely with a flat-top desk, a hammock, and three
+uncomfortable cane-seated chairs. Engravings of the first and latest
+president of the country represented hung against the wall. The other
+room was the consul’s living apartment.
+
+It was eleven o’clock when he returned from the beach, and therefore
+breakfast time. Chanca, the Carib woman who cooked for him, was just
+serving the meal on the side of the gallery facing the sea—a spot
+famous as the coolest in Coralio. The breakfast consisted of shark’s
+fin soup, stew of land crabs, breadfruit, a boiled iguana steak,
+aguacates, a freshly cut pineapple, claret and coffee.
+
+Geddie took his seat, and unrolled with luxurious laziness his bundle
+of newspapers. Here in Coralio for two days or longer he would read of
+goings-on in the world very much as we of the world read those
+whimsical contributions to inexact science that assume to portray the
+doings of the Martians. After he had finished with the papers they
+would be sent on the rounds of the other English-speaking residents of
+the town.
+
+The paper that came first to his hand was one of those bulky mattresses
+of printed stuff upon which the readers of certain New York journals
+are supposed to take their Sabbath literary nap. Opening this the
+consul rested it upon the table, supporting its weight with the aid of
+the back of a chair. Then he partook of his meal deliberately, turning
+the leaves from time to time and glancing half idly at the contents.
+
+Presently he was struck by something familiar to him in a picture—a
+half-page, badly printed reproduction of a photograph of a vessel.
+Languidly interested, he leaned for a nearer scrutiny and a view of the
+florid headlines of the column next to the picture.
+
+Yes; he was not mistaken. The engraving was of the eight-hundred-ton
+yacht _Idalia_, belonging to “that prince of good fellows, Midas of the
+money market, and society’s pink of perfection, J. Ward Tolliver.”
+
+Slowly sipping his black coffee, Geddie read the column of print.
+Following a listed statement of Mr. Tolliver’s real estate and bonds,
+came a description of the yacht’s furnishings, and then the grain of
+news no bigger than a mustard seed. Mr. Tolliver, with a party of
+favoured guests, would sail the next day on a six weeks’ cruise along
+the Central American and South American coasts and among the Bahama
+Islands. Among the guests were Mrs. Cumberland Payne and Miss Ida
+Payne, of Norfolk.
+
+The writer, with the fatuous presumption that was demanded of him by
+his readers, had concocted a romance suited to their palates. He
+bracketed the names of Miss Payne and Mr. Tolliver until he had
+well-nigh read the marriage ceremony over them. He played coyly and
+insinuatingly upon the strings of “_on dit_” and “Madame Rumour” and “a
+little bird” and “no one would be surprised,” and ended with
+congratulations.
+
+Geddie, having finished his breakfast, took his papers to the edge of
+the gallery, and sat there in his favourite steamer chair with his feet
+on the bamboo railing. He lighted a cigar, and looked out upon the sea.
+He felt a glow of satisfaction at finding he was so little disturbed by
+what he had read. He told himself that he had conquered the distress
+that had sent him, a voluntary exile, to this far land of the lotus. He
+could never forget Ida, of course; but there was no longer any pain in
+thinking about her. When they had had that misunderstanding and quarrel
+he had impulsively sought this consulship, with the desire to retaliate
+upon her by detaching himself from her world and presence. He had
+succeeded thoroughly in that. During the twelve months of his life in
+Coralio no word had passed between them, though he had sometimes heard
+of her through the dilatory correspondence with the few friends to whom
+he still wrote. Still he could not repress a little thrill of
+satisfaction at knowing that she had not yet married Tolliver or anyone
+else. But evidently Tolliver had not yet abandoned hope.
+
+Well, it made no difference to him now. He had eaten of the lotus. He
+was happy and content in this land of perpetual afternoon. Those old
+days of life in the States seemed like an irritating dream. He hoped
+Ida would be as happy as he was. The climate as balmy as that of
+distant Avalon; the fetterless, idyllic round of enchanted days; the
+life among this indolent, romantic people—a life full of music,
+flowers, and low laughter; the influence of the imminent sea and
+mountains, and the many shapes of love and magic and beauty that
+bloomed in the white tropic nights—with all he was more than content.
+Also, there was Paula Brannigan.
+
+Geddie intended to marry Paula—if, of course, she would consent; but he
+felt rather sure that she would do that. Somehow, he kept postponing
+his proposal. Several times he had been quite near to it; but a
+mysterious something always held him back. Perhaps it was only the
+unconscious, instinctive conviction that the act would sever the last
+tie that bound him to his old world.
+
+He could be very happy with Paula. Few of the native girls could be
+compared with her. She had attended a convent school in New Orleans for
+two years; and when she chose to display her accomplishments no one
+could detect any difference between her and the girls of Norfolk and
+Manhattan. But it was delicious to see her at home dressed, as she
+sometimes was, in the native costume, with bare shoulders and flowing
+sleeves.
+
+Bernard Brannigan was the great merchant of Coralio. Besides his store,
+he maintained a train of pack mules, and carried on a lively trade with
+the interior towns and villages. He had married a native lady of high
+Castilian descent, but with a tinge of Indian brown showing through her
+olive cheek. The union of the Irish and the Spanish had produced, as it
+so often has, an offshoot of rare beauty and variety. They were very
+excellent people indeed, and the upper story of their house was ready
+to be placed at the service of Geddie and Paula as soon as he should
+make up his mind to speak about it.
+
+By the time two hours were whiled away the consul tired of reading. The
+papers lay scattered about him on the gallery. Reclining there, he
+gazed dreamily out upon an Eden. A clump of banana plants interposed
+their broad shields between him and the sun. The gentle slope from the
+consulate to the sea was covered with the dark-green foliage of
+lemon-trees and orange-trees just bursting into bloom. A lagoon pierced
+the land like a dark, jagged crystal, and above it a pale ceiba-tree
+rose almost to the clouds. The waving cocoanut palms on the beach
+flared their decorative green leaves against the slate of an almost
+quiescent sea. His senses were cognizant of brilliant scarlet and
+ochres amid the vert of the coppice, of odours of fruit and bloom and
+the smoke from Chanca’s clay oven under the calabash-tree; of the
+treble laughter of the native women in their huts, the song of the
+robin, the salt taste of the breeze, the diminuendo of the faint surf
+running along the shore—and, gradually, of a white speck, growing to a
+blur, that intruded itself upon the drab prospect of the sea.
+
+Lazily interested, he watched this blur increase until it became the
+_Idalia_ steaming at full speed, coming down the coast. Without
+changing his position he kept his eyes upon the beautiful white yacht
+as she drew swiftly near, and came opposite to Coralio. Then, sitting
+upright, he saw her float steadily past and on. Scarcely a mile of sea
+had separated her from the shore. He had seen the frequent flash of her
+polished brass work and the stripes of her deck-awnings—so much, and no
+more. Like a ship on a magic lantern slide the _Idalia_ had crossed the
+illuminated circle of the consul’s little world, and was gone. Save for
+the tiny cloud of smoke that was left hanging over the brim of the sea,
+she might have been an immaterial thing, a chimera of his idle brain.
+
+Geddie went into his office and sat down to dawdle over his report. If
+the reading of the article in the paper had left him unshaken, this
+silent passing of the _Idalia_ had done for him still more. It had
+brought the calm and peace of a situation from which all uncertainty
+had been erased. He knew that men sometimes hope without being aware of
+it. Now, since she had come two thousand miles and had passed without a
+sign, not even his unconscious self need cling to the past any longer.
+
+After dinner, when the sun was low behind the mountains, Geddie walked
+on the little strip of beach under the cocoanuts. The wind was blowing
+mildly landward, and the surface of the sea was rippled by tiny
+wavelets.
+
+A miniature breaker, spreading with a soft “swish” upon the sand
+brought with it something round and shiny that rolled back again as the
+wave receded. The next influx beached it clear, and Geddie picked it
+up. The thing was a long-necked wine bottle of colourless glass. The
+cork had been driven in tightly to the level of the mouth, and the end
+covered with dark-red sealing-wax. The bottle contained only what
+seemed to be a sheet of paper, much curled from the manipulation it had
+undergone while being inserted. In the sealing-wax was the impression
+of a seal—probably of a signet-ring, bearing the initials of a
+monogram; but the impression had been hastily made, and the letters
+were past anything more certain than a shrewd conjecture. Ida Payne had
+always worn a signet-ring in preference to any other finger decoration.
+Geddie thought he could make out the familiar “I P”; and a queer
+sensation of disquietude went over him. More personal and intimate was
+this reminder of her than had been the sight of the vessel she was
+doubtless on. He walked back to his house, and set the bottle on his
+desk.
+
+Throwing off his hat and coat, and lighting a lamp—for the night had
+crowded precipitately upon the brief twilight—he began to examine his
+piece of sea salvage.
+
+By holding the bottle near the light and turning it judiciously, he
+made out that it contained a double sheet of note-paper filled with
+close writing; further, that the paper was of the same size and shade
+as that always used by Ida; and that, to the best of his belief, the
+handwriting was hers. The imperfect glass of the bottle so distorted
+the rays of light that he could read no word of the writing; but
+certain capital letters, of which he caught comprehensive glimpses,
+were Ida’s, he felt sure.
+
+There was a little smile both of perplexity and amusement in Geddie’s
+eyes as he set the bottle down, and laid three cigars side by side on
+his desk. He fetched his steamer chair from the gallery, and stretched
+himself comfortably. He would smoke those three cigars while
+considering the problem.
+
+For it amounted to a problem. He almost wished that he had not found
+the bottle; but the bottle was there. Why should it have drifted in
+from the sea, whence come so many disquieting things, to disturb his
+peace?
+
+In this dreamy land, where time seemed so redundant, he had fallen into
+the habit of bestowing much thought upon even trifling matters.
+
+He began to speculate upon many fanciful theories concerning the story
+of the bottle, rejecting each in turn.
+
+Ships in danger of wreck or disablement sometimes cast forth such
+precarious messengers calling for aid. But he had seen the _Idalia_ not
+three hours before, safe and speeding. Suppose the crew had mutinied
+and imprisoned the passengers below, and the message was one begging
+for succour! But, premising such an improbable outrage, would the
+agitated captives have taken the pains to fill four pages of note-paper
+with carefully penned arguments to their rescue.
+
+Thus by elimination he soon rid the matter of the more unlikely
+theories, and was reduced—though aversely—to the less assailable one
+that the bottle contained a message to himself. Ida knew he was in
+Coralio; she must have launched the bottle while the yacht was passing
+and the wind blowing fairly toward the shore.
+
+As soon as Geddie reached this conclusion a wrinkle came between his
+brows and a stubborn look settled around his mouth. He sat looking out
+through the doorway at the gigantic fire-flies traversing the quiet
+streets.
+
+If this was a message to him from Ida, what could it mean save an
+overture toward a reconciliation? And if that, why had she not used the
+same methods of the post instead of this uncertain and even flippant
+means of communication? A note in an empty bottle, cast into the sea!
+There was something light and frivolous about it, if not actually
+contemptuous.
+
+The thought stirred his pride and subdued whatever emotions had been
+resurrected by the finding of the bottle.
+
+Geddie put on his coat and hat and walked out. He followed a street
+that led him along the border of the little plaza where a band was
+playing and people were rambling, care-free and indolent. Some timorous
+_señoritas_ scurrying past with fire-flies tangled in the jetty braids
+of their hair glanced at him with shy, flattering eyes. The air was
+languorous with the scent of jasmin and orange-blossoms.
+
+The consul stayed his steps at the house of Bernard Brannigan. Paula
+was swinging in a hammock on the gallery. She rose from it like a bird
+from its nest. The colour came to her cheek at the sound of Geddie’s
+voice.
+
+He was charmed at the sight of her costume—a flounced muslin dress,
+with a little jacket of white flannel, all made with neatness and
+style. He suggested a stroll, and they walked out to the old Indian
+well on the hill road. They sat on the curb, and there Geddie made the
+expected but long-deferred speech. Certain though he had been that she
+would not say him nay, he was thrilled with joy at the completeness and
+sweetness of her surrender. Here was surely a heart made for love and
+steadfastness. Here was no caprice or questionings or captious
+standards of convention.
+
+When Geddie kissed Paula at her door that night he was happier than he
+had ever been before. “Here in this hollow lotus land, ever to live and
+lie reclined” seemed to him, as it has seemed to many mariners, the
+best as well as the easiest. His future would be an ideal one. He had
+attained a Paradise without a serpent. His Eve would be indeed a part
+of him, unbeguiled, and therefore more beguiling. He had made his
+decision to-night, and his heart was full of serene, assured content.
+
+Geddie went back to his house whistling that finest and saddest love
+song, “La Golondrina.” At the door his tame monkey leaped down from his
+shelf, chattering briskly. The consul turned to his desk to get him
+some nuts he usually kept there. Reaching in the half-darkness, his
+hand struck against the bottle. He started as if he had touched the
+cold rotundity of a serpent.
+
+He had forgotten that the bottle was there.
+
+He lighted the lamp and fed the monkey. Then, very deliberately, he
+lighted a cigar, and took the bottle in his hand, and walked down the
+path to the beach.
+
+There was a moon, and the sea was glorious. The breeze had shifted, as
+it did each evening, and was now rushing steadily seaward.
+
+Stepping to the water’s edge, Geddie hurled the unopened bottle far out
+into the sea. It disappeared for a moment, and then shot upward twice
+its length. Geddie stood still, watching it. The moonlight was so
+bright that he could see it bobbing up and down with the little waves.
+Slowly it receded from the shore, flashing and turning as it went. The
+wind was carrying it out to sea. Soon it became a mere speck,
+doubtfully discerned at irregular intervals; and then the mystery of it
+was swallowed up by the greater mystery of the ocean. Geddie stood
+still upon the beach, smoking and looking out upon the water.
+
+“Simon!—Oh, Simon!—wake up there, Simon!” bawled a sonorous voice at
+the edge of the water.
+
+Old Simon Cruz was a half-breed fisherman and smuggler who lived in a
+hut on the beach. Out of his earliest nap Simon was thus awakened.
+
+He slipped on his shoes and went outside. Just landing from one of the
+_Valhalla’s_ boats was the third mate of that vessel, who was an
+acquaintance of Simon’s, and three sailors from the fruiter.
+
+“Go up, Simon,” called the mate, “and find Dr. Gregg or Mr. Goodwin or
+anybody that’s a friend to Mr. Geddie, and bring ’em here at once.”
+
+“Saints of the skies!” said Simon, sleepily, “nothing has happened to
+Mr. Geddie?”
+
+“He’s under that tarpauling,” said the mate, pointing to the boat, “and
+he’s rather more than half drownded. We seen him from the steamer
+nearly a mile out from shore, swimmin’ like mad after a bottle that was
+floatin’ in the water, outward bound. We lowered the gig and started
+for him. He nearly had his hand on the bottle, when he gave out and
+went under. We pulled him out in time to save him, maybe; but the
+doctor is the one to decide that.”
+
+“A bottle?” said the old man, rubbing his eyes. He was not yet fully
+awake. “Where is the bottle?”
+
+“Driftin’ along out there some’eres,” said the mate, jerking his thumb
+toward the sea. “Get on with you, Simon.”
+
+
+
+
+III
+SMITH
+
+
+Goodwin and the ardent patriot, Zavalla, took all the precautions that
+their foresight could contrive to prevent the escape of President
+Miraflores and his companion. They sent trusted messengers up the coast
+to Solitas and Alazan to warn the local leaders of the flight, and to
+instruct them to patrol the water line and arrest the fugitives at all
+hazards should they reveal themselves in that territory. After this was
+done there remained only to cover the district about Coralio and await
+the coming of the quarry. The nets were well spread. The roads were so
+few, the opportunities for embarkation so limited, and the two or three
+probable points of exit so well guarded that it would be strange indeed
+if there should slip through the meshes so much of the country’s
+dignity, romance, and collateral. The president would, without doubt,
+move as secretly as possible, and endeavour to board a vessel by
+stealth from some secluded point along the shore.
+
+On the fourth day after the receipt of Englehart’s telegram the
+_Karlsefin_, a Norwegian steamer chartered by the New Orleans fruit
+trade, anchored off Coralio with three hoarse toots of her siren. The
+_Karlsefin_ was not one of the line operated by the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company. She was something of a dilettante, doing odd jobs for a
+company that was scarcely important enough to figure as a rival to the
+Vesuvius. The movements of the _Karlsefin_ were dependent upon the
+state of the market. Sometimes she would ply steadily between the
+Spanish Main and New Orleans in the regular transport of fruit; next
+she would be making erratic trips to Mobile or Charleston, or even as
+far north as New York, according to the distribution of the fruit
+supply.
+
+Goodwin lounged upon the beach with the usual crowd of idlers that had
+gathered to view the steamer. Now that President Miraflores might be
+expected to reach the borders of his abjured country at any time, the
+orders were to keep a strict and unrelenting watch. Every vessel that
+approached the shores might now be considered a possible means of
+escape for the fugitives; and an eye was kept even on the sloops and
+dories that belonged to the sea-going contingent of Coralio. Goodwin
+and Zavalla moved everywhere, but without ostentation, watching the
+loopholes of escape.
+
+The customs officials crowded importantly into their boat and rowed out
+to the _Karlsefin_. A boat from the steamer landed her purser with his
+papers, and took out the quarantine doctor with his green umbrella and
+clinical thermometer. Next a swarm of Caribs began to load upon
+lighters the thousands of bunches of bananas heaped upon the shore and
+row them out to the steamer. The _Karlsefin_ had no passenger list, and
+was soon done with the attention of the authorities. The purser
+declared that the steamer would remain at anchor until morning, taking
+on her fruit during the night. The _Karlsefin_ had come, he said, from
+New York, to which port her latest load of oranges and cocoanuts had
+been conveyed. Two or three of the freighter sloops were engaged to
+assist in the work, for the captain was anxious to make a quick return
+in order to reap the advantage offered by a certain dearth of fruit in
+the States.
+
+About four o’clock in the afternoon another of those marine monsters,
+not very familiar in those waters, hove in sight, following the fateful
+_Idalia_—a graceful steam yacht, painted a light buff, clean-cut as a
+steel engraving. The beautiful vessel hovered off shore, see-sawing the
+waves as lightly as a duck in a rain barrel. A swift boat manned by a
+crew in uniform came ashore, and a stocky-built man leaped to the
+sands.
+
+The new-comer seemed to turn a disapproving eye upon the rather motley
+congregation of native Anchurians, and made his way at once toward
+Goodwin, who was the most conspicuously Anglo-Saxon figure present.
+Goodwin greeted him with courtesy.
+
+Conversation developed that the newly landed one was named Smith, and
+that he had come in a yacht. A meagre biography, truly; for the yacht
+was most apparent; and the “Smith” not beyond a reasonable guess before
+the revelation. Yet to the eye of Goodwin, who had seen several things,
+there was a discrepancy between Smith and his yacht. A bullet-headed
+man Smith was, with an oblique, dead eye and the moustache of a
+cocktail-mixer. And unless he had shifted costumes before putting off
+for shore he had affronted the deck of his correct vessel clad in a
+pearl-gray derby, a gay plaid suit and vaudeville neckwear. Men owning
+pleasure yachts generally harmonize better with them.
+
+Smith looked business, but he was no advertiser. He commented upon the
+scenery, remarking upon its fidelity to the pictures in the geography;
+and then inquired for the United States consul. Goodwin pointed out the
+starred-and-striped bunting hanging above the little consulate, which
+was concealed behind the orange-trees.
+
+“Mr. Geddie, the consul, will be sure to be there,” said Goodwin. “He
+was very nearly drowned a few days ago while taking a swim in the sea,
+and the doctor has ordered him to remain indoors for some time.”
+
+Smith plowed his way through the sand to the consulate, his
+haberdashery creating violent discord against the smooth tropical blues
+and greens.
+
+Geddie was lounging in his hammock, somewhat pale of face and languid
+in pose. On that night when the _Valhalla’s_ boat had brought him
+ashore apparently drenched to death by the sea, Doctor Gregg and his
+other friends had toiled for hours to preserve the little spark of life
+that remained to him. The bottle, with its impotent message, was gone
+out to sea, and the problem that it had provoked was reduced to a
+simple sum in addition—one and one make two, by the rule of arithmetic;
+one by the rule of romance.
+
+There is a quaint old theory that man may have two souls—a peripheral
+one which serves ordinarily, and a central one which is stirred only at
+certain times, but then with activity and vigour. While under the
+domination of the former a man will shave, vote, pay taxes, give money
+to his family, buy subscription books and comport himself on the
+average plan. But let the central soul suddenly become dominant, and he
+may, in the twinkling of an eye, turn upon the partner of his joys with
+furious execration; he may change his politics while you could snap
+your fingers; he may deal out deadly insult to his dearest friend; he
+may get him, instanter, to a monastery or a dance hall; he may elope,
+or hang himself—or he may write a song or poem, or kiss his wife
+unasked, or give his funds to the search of a microbe. Then the
+peripheral soul will return; and we have our safe, sane citizen again.
+It is but the revolt of the Ego against Order; and its effect is to
+shake up the atoms only that they may settle where they belong.
+
+Geddie’s revulsion had been a mild one—no more than a swim in a summer
+sea after so inglorious an object as a drifting bottle. And now he was
+himself again. Upon his desk, ready for the post, was a letter to his
+government tendering his resignation as consul, to be effective as soon
+as another could be appointed in his place. For Bernard Brannigan, who
+never did things in a half-way manner, was to take Geddie at once for a
+partner in his very profitable and various enterprises; and Paula was
+happily engaged in plans for refurnishing and decorating the upper
+story of the Brannigan house.
+
+The consul rose from his hammock when he saw the conspicuous stranger
+in his door.
+
+“Keep your seat, old man,” said the visitor, with an airy wave of his
+large hand. “My name’s Smith; and I’ve come in a yacht. You are the
+consul—is that right? A big, cool guy on the beach directed me here.
+Thought I’d pay my respects to the flag.”
+
+“Sit down,” said Geddie. “I’ve been admiring your craft ever since it
+came in sight. Looks like a fast sailer. What’s her tonnage?”
+
+“Search me!” said Smith. “I don’t know what she weighs in at. But she’s
+got a tidy gait. The _Rambler_—that’s her name—don’t take the dust of
+anything afloat. This is my first trip on her. I’m taking a squint
+along this coast just to get an idea of the countries where the rubber
+and red pepper and revolutions come from. I had no idea there was so
+much scenery down here. Why, Central Park ain’t in it with this neck of
+the woods. I’m from New York. They get monkeys, and cocoanuts, and
+parrots down here—is that right?”
+
+“We have them all,” said Geddie. “I’m quite sure that our fauna and
+flora would take a prize over Central Park.”
+
+“Maybe they would,” admitted Smith, cheerfully. “I haven’t seen them
+yet. But I guess you’ve got us skinned on the animal and vegetation
+question. You don’t have much travel here, do you?”
+
+“Travel?” queried the consul. “I suppose you mean passengers on the
+steamers. No; very few people land in Coralio. An investor now and
+then—tourists and sight-seers generally go further down the coast to
+one of the larger towns where there is a harbour.”
+
+“I see a ship out there loading up with bananas,” said Smith. “Any
+passengers come on her?”
+
+“That’s the _Karlsefin_,” said the consul. “She’s a tramp fruiter—made
+her last trip to New York, I believe. No; she brought no passengers. I
+saw her boat come ashore, and there was no one. About the only exciting
+recreation we have here is watching steamers when they arrive; and a
+passenger on one of them generally causes the whole town to turn out.
+If you are going to remain in Coralio a while, Mr. Smith, I’ll be glad
+to take you around to meet some people. There are four or five American
+chaps that are good to know, besides the native high-fliers.”
+
+“Thanks,” said the yachtsman, “but I wouldn’t put you to the trouble.
+I’d like to meet the guys you speak of, but I won’t be here long enough
+to do much knocking around. That cool gent on the beach spoke of a
+doctor; can you tell me where I could find him? The _Rambler_ ain’t
+quite as steady on her feet as a Broadway hotel; and a fellow gets a
+touch of seasickness now and then. Thought I’d strike the croaker for a
+handful of the little sugar pills, in case I need ’em.”
+
+“You will be apt to find Dr. Gregg at the hotel,” said the consul. “You
+can see it from the door—it’s that two-story building with the balcony,
+where the orange-trees are.”
+
+The Hotel de los Estranjeros was a dreary hostelry, in great disuse
+both by strangers and friends. It stood at a corner of the Street of
+the Holy Sepulchre. A grove of small orange-trees crowded against one
+side of it, enclosed by a low, rock wall over which a tall man might
+easily step. The house was of plastered adobe, stained a hundred shades
+of colour by the salt breeze and the sun. Upon its upper balcony opened
+a central door and two windows containing broad jalousies instead of
+sashes.
+
+The lower floor communicated by two doorways with the narrow,
+rock-paved sidewalk. The _pulperia_—or drinking shop—of the
+proprietress, Madama Timotea Ortiz, occupied the ground floor. On the
+bottles of brandy, _anisada_, Scotch “smoke” and inexpensive wines
+behind the little counter the dust lay thick save where the fingers of
+infrequent customers had left irregular prints. The upper story
+contained four or five guest-rooms which were rarely put to their
+destined use. Sometimes a fruit-grower, riding in from his plantation
+to confer with his agent, would pass a melancholy night in the dismal
+upper story; sometimes a minor native official on some trifling
+government quest would have his pomp and majesty awed by Madama’s
+sepulchral hospitality. But Madama sat behind her bar content, not
+desiring to quarrel with Fate. If anyone required meat, drink or
+lodging at the Hotel de los Estranjeros they had but to come, and be
+served. _Está bueno._ If they came not, why, then, they came not. _Está
+bueno._
+
+As the exceptional yachtsman was making his way down the precarious
+sidewalk of the Street of the Holy Sepulchre, the solitary permanent
+guest of that decaying hotel sat at its door, enjoying the breeze from
+the sea.
+
+Dr. Gregg, the quarantine physician, was a man of fifty or sixty, with
+a florid face and the longest beard between Topeka and Terra del Fuego.
+He held his position by virtue of an appointment by the Board of Health
+of a seaport city in one of the Southern states. That city feared the
+ancient enemy of every Southern seaport—the yellow fever—and it was the
+duty of Dr. Gregg to examine crew and passengers of every vessel
+leaving Coralio for preliminary symptoms. The duties were light, and
+the salary, for one who lived in Coralio, ample. Surplus time there was
+in plenty; and the good doctor added to his gains by a large private
+practice among the residents of the coast. The fact that he did not
+know ten words of Spanish was no obstacle; a pulse could be felt and a
+fee collected without one being a linguist. Add to the description the
+facts that the doctor had a story to tell concerning the operation of
+trepanning which no listener had ever allowed him to conclude, and that
+he believed in brandy as a prophylactic; and the special points of
+interest possessed by Dr. Gregg will have become exhausted.
+
+The doctor had dragged a chair to the sidewalk. He was coatless, and he
+leaned back against the wall and smoked, while he stroked his beard.
+Surprise came into his pale blue eyes when he caught sight of Smith in
+his unusual and prismatic clothes.
+
+“You’re Dr. Gregg—is that right?” said Smith, feeling the dog’s head
+pin in his tie. “The constable—I mean the consul, told me you hung out
+at this caravansary. My name’s Smith; and I came in a yacht. Taking a
+cruise around, looking at the monkeys and pineapple-trees. Come inside
+and have a drink, Doc. This café looks on the blink, but I guess it can
+set out something wet.”
+
+“I will join you, sir, in just a taste of brandy,” said Dr. Gregg,
+rising quickly. “I find that as a prophylactic a little brandy is
+almost a necessity in this climate.”
+
+As they turned to enter the _pulperia_ a native man, barefoot, glided
+noiselessly up and addressed the doctor in Spanish. He was
+yellowish-brown, like an over-ripe lemon; he wore a cotton shirt and
+ragged linen trousers girded by a leather belt. His face was like an
+animal’s, live and wary, but without promise of much intelligence. This
+man jabbered with animation and so much seriousness that it seemed a
+pity that his words were to be wasted.
+
+Dr. Gregg felt his pulse.
+
+“You sick?” he inquired.
+
+“_Mi mujer está enferma en la casa_,” said the man, thus endeavouring
+to convey the news, in the only language open to him, that his wife lay
+ill in her palm-thatched hut.
+
+The doctor drew a handful of capsules filled with a white powder from
+his trousers pocket. He counted out ten of them into the native’s hand,
+and held up his forefinger impressively.
+
+“Take one,” said the doctor, “every two hours.” He then held up two
+fingers, shaking them emphatically before the native’s face. Next he
+pulled out his watch and ran his finger round its dial twice. Again the
+two fingers confronted the patient’s nose. “Two—two—two hours,”
+repeated the doctor.
+
+“_Si, Señor_,” said the native, sadly.
+
+He pulled a cheap silver watch from his own pocket and laid it in the
+doctor’s hand. “Me bring,” said he, struggling painfully with his scant
+English, “other watchy to-morrow.” Then he departed downheartedly with
+his capsules.
+
+“A very ignorant race of people, sir,” said the doctor, as he slipped
+the watch into his pocket. “He seems to have mistaken my directions for
+taking the physic for the fee. However, it is all right. He owes me an
+account, anyway. The chances are that he won’t bring the other watch.
+You can’t depend on anything they promise you. About that drink, now?
+How did you come to Coralio, Mr. Smith? I was not aware that any boats
+except the _Karlsefin_ had arrived for some days.”
+
+The two leaned against the deserted bar; and Madama set out a bottle
+without waiting for the doctor’s order. There was no dust on it.
+
+After they had drank twice Smith said:
+
+“You say there were no passengers on the _Karlsefin_, Doc? Are you sure
+about that? It seems to me I heard somebody down on the beach say that
+there was one or two aboard.”
+
+“They were mistaken, sir. I myself went out and put all hands through a
+medical examination, as usual. The _Karlsefin_ sails as soon as she
+gets her bananas loaded, which will be about daylight in the morning,
+and she got everything ready this afternoon. No, sir, there was no
+passenger list. Like that Three-Star? A French schooner landed two
+slooploads of it a month ago. If any customs duties on it went to the
+distinguished republic of Anchuria you may have my hat. If you won’t
+have another, come out and let’s sit in the cool a while. It isn’t
+often we exiles get a chance to talk with somebody from the outside
+world.”
+
+The doctor brought out another chair to the sidewalk for his new
+acquaintance. The two seated themselves.
+
+“You are a man of the world,” said Dr. Gregg; “a man of travel and
+experience. Your decision in a matter of ethics and, no doubt, on the
+points of equity, ability and professional probity should be of value.
+I would be glad if you will listen to the history of a case that I
+think stands unique in medical annals.
+
+“About nine years ago, while I was engaged in the practice of medicine
+in my native city, I was called to treat a case of contusion of the
+skull. I made the diagnosis that a splinter of bone was pressing upon
+the brain, and that the surgical operation known as trepanning was
+required. However, as the patient was a gentleman of wealth and
+position, I called in for consultation Dr.—”
+
+Smith rose from his chair, and laid a hand, soft with apology, upon the
+doctor’s shirt sleeve.
+
+“Say, Doc,” he said, solemnly, “I want to hear that story. You’ve got
+me interested; and I don’t want to miss the rest of it. I know it’s a
+loola by the way it begins; and I want to tell it at the next meeting
+of the Barney O’Flynn Association, if you don’t mind. But I’ve got one
+or two matters to attend to first. If I get ’em attended to in time
+I’ll come right back and hear you spiel the rest before bedtime—is that
+right?”
+
+“By all means,” said the doctor, “get your business attended to, and
+then return. I shall wait up for you. You see, one of the most
+prominent physicians at the consultation diagnosed the trouble as a
+blood clot; another said it was an abscess, but I—”
+
+“Don’t tell me now, Doc. Don’t spoil the story. Wait till I come back.
+I want to hear it as it runs off the reel—is that right?”
+
+The mountains reached up their bulky shoulders to receive the level
+gallop of Apollo’s homing steeds, the day died in the lagoons and in
+the shadowed banana groves and in the mangrove swamps, where the great
+blue crabs were beginning to crawl to land for their nightly ramble.
+And it died, at last, upon the highest peaks. Then the brief twilight,
+ephemeral as the flight of a moth, came and went; the Southern Cross
+peeped with its topmost eye above a row of palms, and the fire-flies
+heralded with their torches the approach of soft-footed night.
+
+In the offing the _Karlsefin_ swayed at anchor, her lights seeming to
+penetrate the water to countless fathoms with their shimmering,
+lanceolate reflections. The Caribs were busy loading her by means of
+the great lighters heaped full from the piles of fruit ranged upon the
+shore.
+
+On the sandy beach, with his back against a cocoanut-tree and the stubs
+of many cigars lying around him, Smith sat waiting, never relaxing his
+sharp gaze in the direction of the steamer.
+
+The incongruous yachtsman had concentrated his interest upon the
+innocent fruiter. Twice had he been assured that no passengers had come
+to Coralio on board of her. And yet, with a persistence not to be
+attributed to an idling voyager, he had appealed the case to the higher
+court of his own eyesight. Surprisingly like some gay-coated lizard, he
+crouched at the foot of the cocoanut palm, and with the beady, shifting
+eyes of the selfsame reptile, sustained his espionage on the
+_Karlsefin_.
+
+On the white sands a whiter gig belonging to the yacht was drawn up,
+guarded by one of the white-ducked crew. Not far away in a _pulperia_
+on the shore-following Calle Grande three other sailors swaggered with
+their cues around Coralio’s solitary billiard-table. The boat lay there
+as if under orders to be ready for use at any moment. There was in the
+atmosphere a hint of expectation, of waiting for something to occur,
+which was foreign to the air of Coralio.
+
+Like some passing bird of brilliant plumage, Smith alights on this
+palmy shore but to preen his wings for an instant and then to fly away
+upon silent pinions. When morning dawned there was no Smith, no waiting
+gig, no yacht in the offing. Smith left no intimation of his mission
+there, no footprints to show where he had followed the trail of his
+mystery on the sands of Coralio that night. He came; he spake his
+strange jargon of the asphalt and the cafés; he sat under the
+cocoanut-tree, and vanished. The next morning Coralio, Smithless, ate
+its fried plantain and said: “The man of pictured clothing went himself
+away.” With the _siesta_ the incident passed, yawning, into history.
+
+So, for a time, must Smith pass behind the scenes of the play. He comes
+no more to Coralio nor to Doctor Gregg, who sits in vain, wagging his
+redundant beard, waiting to enrich his derelict audience with his
+moving tale of trepanning and jealousy.
+
+But prosperously to the lucidity of these loose pages, Smith shall
+flutter among them again. In the nick of time he shall come to tell us
+why he strewed so many anxious cigar stumps around the cocoanut palm
+that night. This he must do; for, when he sailed away before the dawn
+in his yacht _Rambler_, he carried with him the answer to a riddle so
+big and preposterous that few in Anchuria had ventured even to propound
+it.
+
+
+
+
+IV
+CAUGHT
+
+
+The plans for the detention of the flying President Miraflores and his
+companion at the coast line seemed hardly likely to fail. Dr. Zavalla
+himself had gone to the port of Alazan to establish a guard at that
+point. At Solitas the Liberal patriot Varras could be depended upon to
+keep close watch. Goodwin held himself responsible for the district
+about Coralio.
+
+The news of the president’s flight had been disclosed to no one in the
+coast towns save trusted members of the ambitious political party that
+was desirous of succeeding to power. The telegraph wire running from
+San Mateo to the coast had been cut far up on the mountain trail by an
+emissary of Zavalla’s. Long before this could be repaired and word
+received along it from the capital the fugitives would have reached the
+coast and the question of escape or capture been solved.
+
+Goodwin had stationed armed sentinels at frequent intervals along the
+shore for a mile in each direction from Coralio. They were instructed
+to keep a vigilant lookout during the night to prevent Miraflores from
+attempting to embark stealthily by means of some boat or sloop found by
+chance at the water’s edge. A dozen patrols walked the streets of
+Coralio unsuspected, ready to intercept the truant official should he
+show himself there.
+
+Goodwin was very well convinced that no precautions had been
+overlooked. He strolled about the streets that bore such high-sounding
+names and were but narrow, grass-covered lanes, lending his own aid to
+the vigil that had been intrusted to him by Bob Englehart.
+
+The town had begun the tepid round of its nightly diversions. A few
+leisurely dandies, clad in white duck, with flowing neckties, and
+swinging slim bamboo canes, threaded the grassy by-ways toward the
+houses of their favoured señoritas. Those who wooed the art of music
+dragged tirelessly at whining concertinas, or fingered lugubrious
+guitars at doors and windows. An occasional soldier from the _cuartel_,
+with flapping straw hat, without coat or shoes, hurried by, balancing
+his long gun like a lance in one hand. From every density of the
+foliage the giant tree frogs sounded their loud and irritating clatter.
+Further out, where the by-ways perished at the brink of the jungle, the
+guttural cries of marauding baboons and the coughing of the alligators
+in the black estuaries fractured the vain silence of the wood.
+
+By ten o’clock the streets were deserted. The oil lamps that had
+burned, a sickly yellow, at random corners, had been extinguished by
+some economical civic agent. Coralio lay sleeping calmly between
+toppling mountains and encroaching sea like a stolen babe in the arms
+of its abductors. Somewhere over in that tropical darkness—perhaps
+already threading the profundities of the alluvial lowlands—the high
+adventurer and his mate were moving toward land’s end. The game of
+Fox-in-the-Morning should be coming soon to its close.
+
+Goodwin, at his deliberate gait, passed the long, low _cuartel_ where
+Coralio’s contingent of Anchuria’s military force slumbered, with its
+bare toes pointed heavenward. There was a law that no civilian might
+come so near the headquarters of that citadel of war after nine
+o’clock, but Goodwin was always forgetting the minor statutes.
+
+“_Quién vive?_” shrieked the sentinel, wrestling prodigiously with his
+lengthy musket.
+
+“_Americano_,” growled Goodwin, without turning his head, and passed
+on, unhalted.
+
+To the right he turned, and to the left up the street that ultimately
+reached the Plaza Nacional. When within the toss of a cigar stump from
+the intersecting Street of the Holy Sepulchre, he stopped suddenly in
+the pathway.
+
+He saw the form of a tall man, clothed in black and carrying a large
+valise, hurry down the cross-street in the direction of the beach. And
+Goodwin’s second glance made him aware of a woman at the man’s elbow on
+the farther side, who seemed to urge forward, if not even to assist,
+her companion in their swift but silent progress. They were no
+Coralians, those two.
+
+Goodwin followed at increased speed, but without any of the artful
+tactics that are so dear to the heart of the sleuth. The American was
+too broad to feel the instinct of the detective. He stood as an agent
+for the people of Anchuria, and but for political reasons he would have
+demanded then and there the money. It was the design of his party to
+secure the imperilled fund, to restore it to the treasury of the
+country, and to declare itself in power without bloodshed or
+resistance.
+
+The couple halted at the door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros, and the
+man struck upon the wood with the impatience of one unused to his entry
+being stayed. Madama was long in response; but after a time her light
+showed, the door was opened, and the guests housed.
+
+Goodwin stood in the quiet street, lighting another cigar. In two
+minutes a faint gleam began to show between the slats of the jalousies
+in the upper story of the hotel. “They have engaged rooms,” said
+Goodwin to himself. “So, then, their arrangements for sailing have yet
+to be made.”
+
+At that moment there came along one Estebán Delgado, a barber, an enemy
+to existing government, a jovial plotter against stagnation in any
+form. This barber was one of Coralio’s saddest dogs, often remaining
+out of doors as late as eleven, post meridian. He was a partisan
+Liberal; and he greeted Goodwin with flatulent importance as a brother
+in the cause. But he had something important to tell.
+
+“What think you, Don Frank!” he cried, in the universal tone of the
+conspirator. “I have to-night shaved _la barba_—what you call the
+‘weeskers’ of the _Presidente_ himself, of this countree! Consider! He
+sent for me to come. In the poor _casita_ of an old woman he awaited
+me—in a verree leetle house in a dark place. _Carramba!_—el Señor
+Presidente to make himself thus secret and obscured! I think he desired
+not to be known—but, _carajo!_ can you shave a man and not see his
+face? This gold piece he gave me, and said it was to be all quite
+still. I think, Don Frank, there is what you call a chip over the bug.”
+
+“Have you ever seen President Miraflores before?” asked Goodwin.
+
+“But once,” answered Estebán. “He is tall; and he had weeskers, verree
+black and sufficient.”
+
+“Was anyone else present when you shaved him?”
+
+“An old Indian woman, Señor, that belonged with the _casa_, and one
+señorita—a ladee of so much beautee!—_ah, Dios!_”
+
+“All right, Estebán,” said Goodwin. “It’s very lucky that you happened
+along with your tonsorial information. The new administration will be
+likely to remember you for this.”
+
+Then in a few words he made the barber acquainted with the crisis into
+which the affairs of the nation had culminated, and instructed him to
+remain outside, keeping watch upon the two sides of the hotel that
+looked upon the street, and observing whether anyone should attempt to
+leave the house by any door or window. Goodwin himself went to the door
+through which the guests had entered, opened it and stepped inside.
+
+Madama had returned downstairs from her journey above to see after the
+comfort of her lodgers. Her candle stood upon the bar. She was about to
+take a thimbleful of rum as a solace for having her rest disturbed. She
+looked up without surprise or alarm as her third caller entered.
+
+“Ah! it is the Señor Goodwin. Not often does he honour my poor house by
+his presence.”
+
+“I must come oftener,” said Goodwin, with the Goodwin smile. “I hear
+that your cognac is the best between Belize to the north and Rio to the
+south. Set out the bottle, Madama, and let us have the proof in _un
+vasito_ for each of us.”
+
+“My _aguardiente_,” said Madama, with pride, “is the best. It grows, in
+beautiful bottles, in the dark places among the banana-trees. _Si,
+Señor._ Only at midnight can they be picked by sailor-men who bring
+them, before daylight comes, to your back door. Good _aguardiente_ is a
+verree difficult fruit to handle, Señor Goodwin.”
+
+Smuggling, in Coralio, was much nearer than competition to being the
+life of trade. One spoke of it slyly, yet with a certain conceit, when
+it had been well accomplished.
+
+“You have guests in the house to-night,” said Goodwin, laying a silver
+dollar upon the counter.
+
+“Why not?” said Madama, counting the change. “Two; but the smallest
+while finished to arrive. One señor, not quite old, and one señorita of
+sufficient handsomeness. To their rooms they have ascended, not
+desiring the to-eat nor the to-drink. Two rooms—_Numero_ 9 and _Numero_
+10.”
+
+“I was expecting that gentleman and that lady,” said Goodwin. “I have
+important _negocios_ that must be transacted. Will you allow me to see
+them?”
+
+“Why not?” sighed Madama, placidly. “Why should not Señor Goodwin
+ascend and speak to his friends? _Está bueno._ Room _Numero_ 9 and room
+_Numero_ 10.”
+
+Goodwin loosened in his coat pocket the American revolver that he
+carried, and ascended the steep, dark stairway.
+
+In the hallway above, the saffron light from a hanging lamp allowed him
+to select the gaudy numbers on the doors. He turned the knob of Number
+9, entered and closed the door behind him.
+
+If that was Isabel Guilbert seated by the table in that poorly
+furnished room, report had failed to do her charms justice. She rested
+her head upon one hand. Extreme fatigue was signified in every line of
+her figure; and upon her countenance a deep perplexity was written. Her
+eyes were gray-irised, and of that mould that seems to have belonged to
+the orbs of all the famous queens of hearts. Their whites were
+singularly clear and brilliant, concealed above the irises by heavy
+horizontal lids, and showing a snowy line below them. Such eyes denote
+great nobility, vigour, and, if you can conceive of it, a most generous
+selfishness. She looked up when the American entered with an expression
+of surprised inquiry, but without alarm.
+
+Goodwin took off his hat and seated himself, with his characteristic
+deliberate ease, upon a corner of the table. He held a lighted cigar
+between his fingers. He took this familiar course because he was sure
+that preliminaries would be wasted upon Miss Guilbert. He knew her
+history, and the small part that the conventions had played in it.
+
+“Good evening,” he said. “Now, madame, let us come to business at once.
+You will observe that I mention no names, but I know who is in the next
+room, and what he carries in that valise. That is the point which
+brings me here. I have come to dictate terms of surrender.”
+
+The lady neither moved nor replied, but steadily regarded the cigar in
+Goodwin’s hand.
+
+“We,” continued the dictator, thoughtfully regarding the neat buckskin
+shoe on his gently swinging foot—“I speak for a considerable majority
+of the people—demand the return of the stolen funds belonging to them.
+Our terms go very little further than that. They are very simple. As an
+accredited spokesman, I promise that our interference will cease if
+they are accepted. Give up the money, and you and your companion will
+be permitted to proceed wherever you will. In fact, assistance will be
+given you in the matter of securing a passage by any outgoing vessel
+you may choose. It is on my personal responsibility that I add
+congratulations to the gentleman in Number 10 upon his taste in
+feminine charms.”
+
+Returning his cigar to his mouth, Goodwin observed her, and saw that
+her eyes followed it and rested upon it with icy and significant
+concentration. Apparently she had not heard a word he had said. He
+understood, tossed the cigar out the window, and, with an amused laugh,
+slid from the table to his feet.
+
+“That is better,” said the lady. “It makes it possible for me to listen
+to you. For a second lesson in good manners, you might now tell me by
+whom I am being insulted.”
+
+“I am sorry,” said Goodwin, leaning one hand on the table, “that my
+time is too brief for devoting much of it to a course of etiquette.
+Come, now; I appeal to your good sense. You have shown yourself, in
+more than one instance, to be well aware of what is to your advantage.
+This is an occasion that demands the exercise of your undoubted
+intelligence. There is no mystery here. I am Frank Goodwin; and I have
+come for the money. I entered this room at a venture. Had I entered the
+other I would have had it before now. Do you want it in words? The
+gentleman in Number 10 has betrayed a great trust. He has robbed his
+people of a large sum, and it is I who will prevent their losing it. I
+do not say who that gentleman is; but if I should be forced to see him
+and he should prove to be a certain high official of the republic, it
+will be my duty to arrest him. The house is guarded. I am offering you
+liberal terms. It is not absolutely necessary that I confer personally
+with the gentleman in the next room. Bring me the valise containing the
+money, and we will call the affair ended.”
+
+The lady arose from her chair and stood for a moment, thinking deeply.
+
+“Do you live here, Mr. Goodwin?” she asked, presently.
+
+“Yes.”
+
+“What is your authority for this intrusion?”
+
+“I am an instrument of the republic. I was advised by wire of the
+movements of the—gentleman in Number 10.”
+
+“May I ask you two or three questions? I believe you to be a man more
+apt to be truthful than—timid. What sort of a town is this—Coralio, I
+think they call it?”
+
+“Not much of a town,” said Goodwin, smiling. “A banana town, as they
+run. Grass huts, ’dobes, five or six two-story houses, accommodations
+limited, population half-breed Spanish and Indian, Caribs and
+blackamoors. No sidewalks to speak of, no amusements. Rather unmoral.
+That’s an offhand sketch, of course.”
+
+“Are there any inducements, say in a social or in a business way, for
+people to reside here?”
+
+“Oh, yes,” answered Goodwin, smiling broadly. “There are no afternoon
+teas, no hand-organs, no department stores—and there is no extradition
+treaty.”
+
+“He told me,” went on the lady, speaking as if to herself, and with a
+slight frown, “that there were towns on this coast of beauty and
+importance; that there was a pleasing social order—especially an
+American colony of cultured residents.”
+
+“There is an American colony,” said Goodwin, gazing at her in some
+wonder. “Some of the members are all right. Some are fugitives from
+justice from the States. I recall two exiled bank presidents, one army
+paymaster under a cloud, a couple of manslayers, and a widow—arsenic, I
+believe, was the suspicion in her case. I myself complete the colony,
+but, as yet, I have not distinguished myself by any particular crime.”
+
+“Do not lose hope,” said the lady, dryly; “I see nothing in your
+actions to-night to guarantee you further obscurity. Some mistake has
+been made; I do not know just where. But _him_ you shall not disturb
+to-night. The journey has fatigued him so that he has fallen asleep, I
+think, in his clothes. You talk of stolen money! I do not understand
+you. Some mistake has been made. I will convince you. Remain where you
+are and I will bring you the valise that you seem to covet so, and show
+it to you.”
+
+She moved toward the closed door that connected the two rooms, but
+stopped, and half turned and bestowed upon Goodwin a grave, searching
+look that ended in a quizzical smile.
+
+“You force my door,” she said, “and you follow your ruffianly behaviour
+with the basest accusations; and yet”—she hesitated, as if to
+reconsider what she was about to say—“and yet—it is a puzzling thing—I
+am sure there has been some mistake.”
+
+She took a step toward the door, but Goodwin stayed her by a light
+touch upon her arm. I have said before that women turned to look at him
+in the streets. He was the viking sort of man, big, good-looking, and
+with an air of kindly truculence. She was dark and proud, glowing or
+pale as her mood moved her. I do not know if Eve were light or dark,
+but if such a woman had stood in the garden I know that the apple would
+have been eaten. This woman was to be Goodwin’s fate, and he did not
+know it; but he must have felt the first throes of destiny, for, as he
+faced her, the knowledge of what report named her turned bitter in his
+throat.
+
+“If there has been any mistake,” he said, hotly, “it was yours. I do
+not blame the man who has lost his country, his honour, and is about to
+lose the poor consolation of his stolen riches as much as I blame you,
+for, by Heaven! I can very well see how he was brought to it. I can
+understand, and pity him. It is such women as you that strew this
+degraded coast with wretched exiles, that make men forget their trusts,
+that drag—”
+
+The lady interrupted him with a weary gesture.
+
+“There is no need to continue your insults,” she said, coldly. “I do
+not understand what you are saying, nor do I know what mad blunder you
+are making; but if the inspection of the contents of a gentleman’s
+portmanteau will rid me of you, let us delay it no longer.”
+
+She passed quickly and noiselessly into the other room, and returned
+with the heavy leather valise, which she handed to the American with an
+air of patient contempt.
+
+Goodwin set the valise quickly upon the table and began to unfasten the
+straps. The lady stood by, with an expression of infinite scorn and
+weariness upon her face.
+
+The valise opened wide to a powerful, sidelong wrench. Goodwin dragged
+out two or three articles of clothing, exposing the bulk of its
+contents—package after package of tightly packed United States bank and
+treasury notes of large denomination. Reckoning from the high figures
+written upon the paper bands that bound them, the total must have come
+closely upon the hundred thousand mark.
+
+Goodwin glanced swiftly at the woman, and saw, with surprise and a
+thrill of pleasure that he wondered at, that she had experienced an
+unmistakable shock. Her eyes grew wide, she gasped, and leaned heavily
+against the table. She had been ignorant, then, he inferred, that her
+companion had looted the government treasury. But why, he angrily asked
+himself, should he be so well pleased to think this wandering and
+unscrupulous singer not so black as report had painted her?
+
+A noise in the other room startled them both. The door swung open, and
+a tall, elderly, dark complexioned man, recently shaven, hurried into
+the room.
+
+All the pictures of President Miraflores represent him as the possessor
+of a luxuriant supply of dark and carefully tended whiskers; but the
+story of the barber, Estebán, had prepared Goodwin for the change.
+
+The man stumbled in from the dark room, his eyes blinking at the
+lamplight, and heavy from sleep.
+
+“What does this mean?” he demanded in excellent English, with a keen
+and perturbed look at the American—“robbery?”
+
+“Very near it,” answered Goodwin. “But I rather think I’m in time to
+prevent it. I represent the people to whom this money belongs, and I
+have come to convey it back to them.” He thrust his hand into a pocket
+of his loose, linen coat.
+
+The other man’s hand went quickly behind him.
+
+“Don’t draw,” called Goodwin, sharply; “I’ve got you covered from my
+pocket.”
+
+The lady stepped forward, and laid one hand upon the shoulder of her
+hesitating companion. She pointed to the table. “Tell me the truth—the
+truth,” she said, in a low voice. “Whose money is that?”
+
+The man did not answer. He gave a deep, long-drawn sigh, leaned and
+kissed her on the forehead, stepped back into the other room and closed
+the door.
+
+Goodwin foresaw his purpose, and jumped for the door, but the report of
+the pistol echoed as his hand touched the knob. A heavy fall followed,
+and some one swept him aside and struggled into the room of the fallen
+man.
+
+A desolation, thought Goodwin, greater than that derived from the loss
+of cavalier and gold must have been in the heart of the enchantress to
+have wrung from her, in that moment, the cry of one turning to the
+all-forgiving, all-comforting earthly consoler—to have made her call
+out from that bloody and dishonoured room—“Oh, mother, mother, mother!”
+
+But there was an alarm outside. The barber, Estebán, at the sound of
+the shot, had raised his voice; and the shot itself had aroused half
+the town. A pattering of feet came up the street, and official orders
+rang out on the still air. Goodwin had a duty to perform. Circumstances
+had made him the custodian of his adopted country’s treasure. Swiftly
+cramming the money into the valise, he closed it, leaned far out of the
+window and dropped it into a thick orange-tree in the little inclosure
+below.
+
+They will tell you in Coralio, as they delight in telling the stranger,
+of the conclusion of that tragic flight. They will tell you how the
+upholders of the law came apace when the alarm was sounded—the
+_Comandante_ in red slippers and a jacket like a head waiter’s and
+girded sword, the soldiers with their interminable guns, followed by
+outnumbering officers struggling into their gold lace and epaulettes;
+the barefooted policemen (the only capables in the lot), and ruffled
+citizens of every hue and description.
+
+They say that the countenance of the dead man was marred sadly by the
+effects of the shot; but he was identified as the fallen president by
+both Goodwin and the barber Estebán. On the next morning messages began
+to come over the mended telegraph wire; and the story of the flight
+from the capital was given out to the public. In San Mateo the
+revolutionary party had seized the sceptre of government, without
+opposition, and the _vivas_ of the mercurial populace quickly effaced
+the interest belonging to the unfortunate Miraflores.
+
+They will relate to you how the new government sifted the towns and
+raked the roads to find the valise containing Anchuria’s surplus
+capital, which the president was known to have carried with him, but
+all in vain. In Coralio Señor Goodwin himself led the searching party
+which combed that town as carefully as a woman combs her hair; but the
+money was not found.
+
+So they buried the dead man, without honours, back of the town near the
+little bridge that spans the mangrove swamp; and for a _real_ a boy
+will show you his grave. They say that the old woman in whose hut the
+barber shaved the president placed the wooden slab at his head, and
+burned the inscription upon it with a hot iron.
+
+You will hear also that Señor Goodwin, like a tower of strength,
+shielded Doña Isabel Guilbert through those subsequent distressful
+days; and that his scruples as to her past career (if he had any)
+vanished; and her adventuresome waywardness (if she had any) left her,
+and they were wedded and were happy.
+
+The American built a home on a little foothill near the town. It is a
+conglomerate structure of native woods that, exported, would be worth a
+fortune, and of brick, palm, glass, bamboo and adobe. There is a
+paradise of nature about it; and something of the same sort within. The
+natives speak of its interior with hands uplifted in admiration. There
+are floors polished like mirrors and covered with hand-woven Indian
+rugs of silk fibre, tall ornaments and pictures, musical instruments
+and papered walls—“figure-it-to-yourself!” they exclaim.
+
+But they cannot tell you in Coralio (as you shall learn) what became of
+the money that Frank Goodwin dropped into the orange-tree. But that
+shall come later; for the palms are fluttering in the breeze, bidding
+us to sport and gaiety.
+
+
+
+
+V
+CUPID’S EXILE NUMBER TWO
+
+
+The United States of America, after looking over its stock of consular
+timber, selected Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood, of Dalesburg, Alabama,
+for a successor to Willard Geddie, resigned.
+
+Without prejudice to Mr. Atwood, it will have to be acknowledged that,
+in this instance, it was the man who sought the office. As with the
+self-banished Geddie, it was nothing less than the artful smiles of
+lovely woman that had driven Johnny Atwood to the desperate expedient
+of accepting office under a despised Federal Government so that he
+might go far, far away and never see again the false, fair face that
+had wrecked his young life. The consulship at Coralio seemed to offer a
+retreat sufficiently removed and romantic enough to inject the
+necessary drama into the pastoral scenes of Dalesburg life.
+
+It was while playing the part of Cupid’s exile that Johnny added his
+handiwork to the long list of casualties along the Spanish Main by his
+famous manipulation of the shoe market, and his unparalleled feat of
+elevating the most despised and useless weed in his own country from
+obscurity to be a valuable product in international commerce.
+
+The trouble began, as trouble often begins instead of ending, with a
+romance. In Dalesburg there was a man named Elijah Hemstetter, who kept
+a general store. His family consisted of one daughter called Rosine, a
+name that atoned much for “Hemstetter.” This young woman was possessed
+of plentiful attractions, so that the young men of the community were
+agitated in their bosoms. Among the more agitated was Johnny, the son
+of Judge Atwood, who lived in the big colonial mansion on the edge of
+Dalesburg.
+
+It would seem that the desirable Rosine should have been pleased to
+return the affection of an Atwood, a name honoured all over the state
+long before and since the war. It does seem that she should have gladly
+consented to have been led into that stately but rather empty colonial
+mansion. But not so. There was a cloud on the horizon, a threatening,
+cumulus cloud, in the shape of a lively and shrewd young farmer in the
+neighbourhood who dared to enter the lists as a rival to the high-born
+Atwood.
+
+One night Johnny propounded to Rosine a question that is considered of
+much importance by the young of the human species. The accessories were
+all there—moonlight, oleanders, magnolias, the mock-bird’s song.
+Whether or no the shadow of Pinkney Dawson, the prosperous young
+farmer, came between them on that occasion is not known; but Rosine’s
+answer was unfavourable. Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood bowed till his
+hat touched the lawn grass, and went away with his head high, but with
+a sore wound in his pedigree and heart. A Hemstetter refuse an Atwood!
+Zounds!
+
+Among other accidents of that year was a Democratic president. Judge
+Atwood was a warhorse of Democracy. Johnny persuaded him to set the
+wheels moving for some foreign appointment. He would go away—away.
+Perhaps in years to come Rosine would think how true, how faithful his
+love had been, and would drop a tear—maybe in the cream she would be
+skimming for Pink Dawson’s breakfast.
+
+The wheels of politics revolved; and Johnny was appointed consul to
+Coralio. Just before leaving he dropped in at Hemstetter’s to say
+good-bye. There was a queer, pinkish look about Rosine’s eyes; and had
+the two been alone, the United States might have had to cast about for
+another consul. But Pink Dawson was there, of course, talking about his
+400-acre orchard, and the three-mile alfalfa tract, and the 200-acre
+pasture. So Johnny shook hands with Rosine as coolly as if he were only
+going to run up to Montgomery for a couple of days. They had the royal
+manner when they chose, those Atwoods.
+
+“If you happen to strike anything in the way of a good investment down
+there, Johnny,” said Pink Dawson, “just let me know, will you? I reckon
+I could lay my hands on a few extra thousands ’most any time for a
+profitable deal.”
+
+“Certainly, Pink,” said Johnny, pleasantly. “If I strike anything of
+the sort I’ll let you in with pleasure.”
+
+So Johnny went down to Mobile and took a fruit steamer for the coast of
+Anchuria.
+
+When the new consul arrived in Coralio the strangeness of the scenes
+diverted him much. He was only twenty-two; and the grief of youth is
+not worn like a garment as it is by older men. It has its seasons when
+it reigns; and then it is unseated for a time by the assertion of the
+keen senses.
+
+Billy Keogh and Johnny seemed to conceive a mutual friendship at once.
+Keogh took the new consul about town and presented him to the handful
+of Americans and the smaller number of French and Germans who made up
+the “foreign” contingent. And then, of course, he had to be more
+formally introduced to the native officials, and have his credentials
+transmitted through an interpreter.
+
+There was something about the young Southerner that the sophisticated
+Keogh liked. His manner was simple almost to boyishness; but he
+possessed the cool carelessness of a man of far greater age and
+experience. Neither uniforms nor titles, red tape nor foreign
+languages, mountains nor sea weighed upon his spirits. He was heir to
+all the ages, an Atwood, of Dalesburg; and you might know every thought
+conceived in his bosom.
+
+Geddie came down to the consulate to explain the duties and workings of
+the office. He and Keogh tried to interest the new consul in their
+description of the work that his government expected him to perform.
+
+“It’s all right,” said Johnny from the hammock that he had set up as
+the official reclining place. “If anything turns up that has to be done
+I’ll let you fellows do it. You can’t expect a Democrat to work during
+his first term of holding office.”
+
+“You might look over these headings,” suggested Geddie, “of the
+different lines of exports you will have to keep account of. The fruit
+is classified; and there are the valuable woods, coffee, rubber—”
+
+“That last account sounds all right,” interrupted Mr. Atwood. “Sounds
+as if it could be stretched. I want to buy a new flag, a monkey, a
+guitar and a barrel of pineapples. Will that rubber account stretch
+over ’em?”
+
+“That’s merely statistics,” said Geddie, smiling. “The expense account
+is what you want. It is supposed to have a slight elasticity. The
+‘stationery’ items are sometimes carelessly audited by the State
+Department.”
+
+“We’re wasting our time,” said Keogh. “This man was born to hold
+office. He penetrates to the root of the art at one step of his eagle
+eye. The true genius of government shows its hand in every word of his
+speech.”
+
+“I didn’t take this job with any intention of working,” explained
+Johnny, lazily. “I wanted to go somewhere in the world where they
+didn’t talk about farms. There are none here, are there?”
+
+“Not the kind you are acquainted with,” answered the ex-consul. “There
+is no such art here as agriculture. There never was a plow or a reaper
+within the boundaries of Anchuria.”
+
+“This is the country for me,” murmured the consul, and immediately he
+fell asleep.
+
+The cheerful tintypist pursued his intimacy with Johnny in spite of
+open charges that he did so to obtain a preëmption on a seat in that
+coveted spot, the rear gallery of the consulate. But whether his
+designs were selfish or purely friendly, Keogh achieved that desirable
+privilege. Few were the nights on which the two could not be found
+reposing there in the sea breeze, with their heels on the railing, and
+the cigars and brandy conveniently near.
+
+One evening they sat thus, mainly silent, for their talk had dwindled
+before the stilling influence of an unusual night.
+
+There was a great, full moon; and the sea was mother-of-pearl. Almost
+every sound was hushed, for the air was but faintly stirring; and the
+town lay panting, waiting for the night to cool. Offshore lay the fruit
+steamer _Andador_, of the Vesuvius line, full-laden and scheduled to
+sail at six in the morning. There were no loiterers on the beach. So
+bright was the moonlight that the two men could see the small pebbles
+shining on the beach where the gentle surf wetted them.
+
+Then down the coast, tacking close to shore, slowly swam a little
+sloop, white-winged like some snowy sea fowl. Its course lay within
+twenty points of the wind’s eye; so it veered in and out again in long,
+slow strokes like the movements of a graceful skater.
+
+Again the tactics of its crew brought it close in shore, this time
+nearly opposite the consulate; and then there blew from the sloop clear
+and surprising notes as if from a horn of elfland. A fairy bugle it
+might have been, sweet and silvery and unexpected, playing with spirit
+the familiar air of “Home, Sweet Home.”
+
+It was a scene set for the land of the lotus. The authority of the sea
+and the tropics, the mystery that attends unknown sails, and the
+prestige of drifting music on moonlit waters gave it an anodynous
+charm. Johnny Atwood felt it, and thought of Dalesburg; but as soon as
+Keogh’s mind had arrived at a theory concerning the peripatetic solo he
+sprang to the railing, and his ear-rending yawp fractured the silence
+of Coralio like a cannon shot.
+
+“Mel-lin-ger a-hoy!”
+
+The sloop was now on its outward tack; but from it came a clear,
+answering hail:
+
+“Good-bye, Billy … go-ing home—bye!”
+
+The _Andador_ was the sloop’s destination. No doubt some passenger with
+a sailing permit from some up-the-coast point had come down in this
+sloop to catch the regular fruit steamer on its return trip. Like a
+coquettish pigeon the little boat tacked on its eccentric way until at
+last its white sail was lost to sight against the larger bulk of the
+fruiter’s side.
+
+“That’s old H. P. Mellinger,” explained Keogh, dropping back into his
+chair. “He’s going back to New York. He was private secretary of the
+late hot-foot president of this grocery and fruit stand that they call
+a country. His job’s over now; and I guess old Mellinger is glad.”
+
+“Why does he disappear to music, like Zo-zo, the magic queen?” asked
+Johnny. “Just to show ’em that he doesn’t care?”
+
+“That noise you heard is a phonograph,” said Keogh. “I sold him that.
+Mellinger had a graft in this country that was the only thing of its
+kind in the world. The tooting machine saved it for him once, and he
+always carried it around with him afterward.”
+
+“Tell me about it,” demanded Johnny, betraying interest.
+
+“I’m no disseminator of narratives,” said Keogh. “I can use language
+for purposes of speech; but when I attempt a discourse the words come
+out as they will, and they may make sense when they strike the
+atmosphere, or they may not.”
+
+“I want to hear about that graft,” persisted Johnny. “You’ve got no
+right to refuse. I’ve told you all about every man, woman and hitching
+post in Dalesburg.”
+
+“You shall hear it,” said Keogh. “I said my instincts of narrative were
+perplexed. Don’t you believe it. It’s an art I’ve acquired along with
+many other of the graces and sciences.”
+
+
+
+
+VI
+THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT
+
+
+“What was this graft?” asked Johnny, with the impatience of the great
+public to whom tales are told.
+
+“’Tis contrary to art and philosophy to give you the information,” said
+Keogh, calmly. “The art of narrative consists in concealing from your
+audience everything it wants to know until after you expose your
+favourite opinions on topics foreign to the subject. A good story is
+like a bitter pill with the sugar coating inside of it. I will begin,
+if you please, with a horoscope located in the Cherokee Nation; and end
+with a moral tune on the phonograph.
+
+“Me and Henry Horsecollar brought the first phonograph to this country.
+Henry was a quarter-breed, quarter-back Cherokee, educated East in the
+idioms of football, and West in contraband whisky, and a gentleman, the
+same as you and me. He was easy and romping in his ways; a man about
+six foot, with a kind of rubber-tire movement. Yes, he was a little man
+about five foot five, or five foot eleven. He was what you would call a
+medium tall man of average smallness. Henry had quit college once, and
+the Muscogee jail three times—the last-named institution on account of
+introducing and selling whisky in the territories. Henry Horsecollar
+never let any cigar stores come up and stand behind him. He didn’t
+belong to that tribe of Indians.
+
+“Henry and me met at Texarkana, and figured out this phonograph scheme.
+He had $360 which came to him out of a land allotment in the
+reservation. I had run down from Little Rock on account of a
+distressful scene I had witnessed on the street there. A man stood on a
+box and passed around some gold watches, screw case, stem-winders,
+Elgin movement, very elegant. Twenty bucks they cost you over the
+counter. At three dollars the crowd fought for the tickers. The man
+happened to find a valise full of them handy, and he passed them out
+like putting hot biscuits on a plate. The backs were hard to unscrew,
+but the crowd put its ear to the case, and they ticked mollifying and
+agreeable. Three of these watches were genuine tickers; the rest were
+only kickers. Hey? Why, empty cases with one of them horny black bugs
+that fly around electric lights in ’em. Them bugs kick off minutes and
+seconds industrious and beautiful. So, this man I was speaking of
+cleaned up $288; and then he went away, because he knew that when it
+came time to wind watches in Little Rock an entomologist would be
+needed, and he wasn’t one.
+
+“So, as I say, Henry had $360, and I had $288. The idea of introducing
+the phonograph to South America was Henry’s; but I took to it freely,
+being fond of machinery of all kinds.
+
+“‘The Latin races,’ says Henry, explaining easy in the idioms he
+learned at college, ‘are peculiarly adapted to be victims of the
+phonograph. They have the artistic temperament. They yearn for music
+and color and gaiety. They give wampum to the hand-organ man and the
+four-legged chicken in the tent when they’re months behind with the
+grocery and the bread-fruit tree.’
+
+“‘Then,’ says I, ‘we’ll export canned music to the Latins; but I’m
+mindful of Mr. Julius Cæsar’s account of ’em where he says: “_Omnia
+Gallia in tres partes divisa est_;” which is the same as to say, “We
+will need all of our gall in devising means to tree them parties.”’
+
+“I hated to make a show of education; but I was disinclined to be
+overdone in syntax by a mere Indian, a member of a race to which we owe
+nothing except the land on which the United States is situated.
+
+“We bought a fine phonograph in Texarkana—one of the best make—and half
+a trunkful of records. We packed up, and took the T. and P. for New
+Orleans. From that celebrated centre of molasses and disfranchised coon
+songs we took a steamer for South America.
+
+“We landed at Solitas, forty miles up the coast from here. ’Twas a
+palatable enough place to look at. The houses were clean and white; and
+to look at ’em stuck around among the scenery they reminded you of
+hard-boiled eggs served with lettuce. There was a block of skyscraper
+mountains in the suburbs; and they kept pretty quiet, like they had
+crept up there and were watching the town. And the sea was remarking
+‘Sh-sh-sh’ on the beach; and now and then a ripe cocoanut would drop
+kerblip in the sand; and that was all there was doing. Yes, I judge
+that town was considerably on the quiet. I judge that after Gabriel
+quits blowing his horn, and the car starts, with Philadelphia swinging
+to the last strap, and Pine Gully, Arkansas, hanging onto the rear
+step, this town of Solitas will wake up and ask if anybody spoke.
+
+“The captain went ashore with us, and offered to conduct what he seemed
+to like to call the obsequies. He introduced Henry and me to the United
+States Consul, and a roan man, the head of the Department of Mercenary
+and Licentious Dispositions, the way it read upon his sign.
+
+“‘I touch here again a week from to-day,’ says the captain.
+
+“‘By that time,’ we told him, ‘we’ll be amassing wealth in the interior
+towns with our galvanized prima donna and correct imitations of Sousa’s
+band excavating a march from a tin mine.’
+
+“‘Ye’ll not,’ says the captain. ‘Ye’ll be hypnotized. Any gentleman in
+the audience who kindly steps upon the stage and looks this country in
+the eye will be converted to the hypothesis that he’s but a fly in the
+Elgin creamery. Ye’ll be standing knee deep in the surf waiting for me,
+and your machine for making Hamburger steak out of the hitherto
+respected art of music will be playing “There’s no place like home.”’
+
+“Henry skinned a twenty off his roll, and received from the Bureau of
+Mercenary Dispositions a paper bearing a red seal and a dialect story,
+and no change.
+
+“Then we got the consul full of red wine, and struck him for a
+horoscope. He was a thin, youngish kind of man, I should say past
+fifty, sort of French-Irish in his affections, and puffed up with
+disconsolation. Yes, he was a flattened kind of a man, in whom drink
+lay stagnant, inclined to corpulence and misery. Yes, I think he was a
+kind of Dutchman, being very sad and genial in his ways.
+
+“‘The marvelous invention,’ he says, ‘entitled the phonograph, has
+never invaded these shores. The people have never heard it. They would
+not believe it if they should. Simple-hearted children of nature,
+progress has never condemned them to accept the work of a can-opener as
+an overture, and rag-time might incite them to a bloody revolution. But
+you can try the experiment. The best chance you have is that the
+populace may not wake up when you play. There’s two ways,’ says the
+consul, ‘they may take it. They may become inebriated with attention,
+like an Atlanta colonel listening to “Marching Through Georgia,” or
+they will get excited and transpose the key of the music with an axe
+and yourselves into a dungeon. In the latter case,’ says the consul,
+‘I’ll do my duty by cabling to the State Department, and I’ll wrap the
+Stars and Stripes around you when you come to be shot, and threaten
+them with the vengeance of the greatest gold export and financial
+reserve nation on earth. The flag is full of bullet holes now,’ says
+the consul, ‘made in that way. Twice before,’ says the consul, ‘I have
+cabled our government for a couple of gunboats to protect American
+citizens. The first time the Department sent me a pair of gum boots.
+The other time was when a man named Pease was going to be executed
+here. They referred that appeal to the Secretary of Agriculture. Let us
+now disturb the señor behind the bar for a subsequence of the red
+wine.’
+
+“Thus soliloquized the consul of Solitas to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+
+“But, notwithstanding, we hired a room that afternoon in the Calle de
+los Angeles, the main street that runs along the shore, and put our
+trunks there. ’Twas a good-sized room, dark and cheerful, but small.
+’Twas on a various street, diversified by houses and conservatory
+plants. The peasantry of the city passed to and fro on the fine
+pasturage between the sidewalks. ’Twas, for the world, like an opera
+chorus when the Royal Kafoozlum is about to enter.
+
+“We were rubbing the dust off the machine and getting fixed to start
+business the next day, when a big, fine-looking white man in white
+clothes stopped at the door and looked in. We extended the invitations,
+and he walked inside and sized us up. He was chewing a long cigar, and
+wrinkling his eyes, meditative, like a girl trying to decide which
+dress to wear to the party.
+
+“‘New York?’ he says to me finally.
+
+“‘Originally, and from time to time,’ I says. ‘Hasn’t it rubbed off
+yet?’
+
+“‘It’s simple,’ says he, ‘when you know how. It’s the fit of the vest.
+They don’t cut vests right anywhere else. Coats, maybe, but not vests.’
+
+“The white man looks at Henry Horsecollar and hesitates.
+
+“‘Injun,’ says Henry; ‘tame Injun.’
+
+“‘Mellinger,’ says the man—‘Homer P. Mellinger. Boys, you’re
+confiscated. You’re babes in the wood without a chaperon or referee,
+and it’s my duty to start you going. I’ll knock out the props and
+launch you proper in the pellucid waters of this tropical mud puddle.
+You’ll have to be christened, and if you’ll come with me I’ll break a
+bottle of wine across your bows, according to Hoyle.’
+
+“Well, for two days Homer P. Mellinger did the honors. That man cut ice
+in Anchuria. He was It. He was the Royal Kafoozlum. If me and Henry was
+babes in the wood, he was a Robin Redbreast from the topmost bough. Him
+and me and Henry Horsecollar locked arms, and toted that phonograph
+around, and had wassail and diversions. Everywhere we found doors open
+we went inside and set the machine going, and Mellinger called upon the
+people to observe the artful music and his two lifelong friends, the
+Señors Americanos. The opera chorus was agitated with esteem, and
+followed us from house to house. There was a different kind of drink to
+be had with every tune. The natives had acquirements of a pleasant
+thing in the way of a drink that gums itself to the recollection. They
+chop off the end of a green cocoanut, and pour in on the juice of it
+French brandy and other adjuvants. We had them and other things.
+
+“Mine and Henry’s money was counterfeit. Everything was on Homer P.
+Mellinger. That man could find rolls of bills concealed in places on
+his person where Hermann the Wizard couldn’t have conjured out a rabbit
+or an omelette. He could have founded universities, and made orchid
+collections, and then had enough left to purchase the colored vote of
+his country. Henry and me wondered what his graft was. One evening he
+told us.
+
+“‘Boys,’ said he, ‘I’ve deceived you. You think I’m a painted
+butterfly; but in fact I’m the hardest worked man in this country. Ten
+years ago I landed on its shores; and two years ago on the point of its
+jaw. Yes, I guess I can get the decision over this ginger cake
+commonwealth at the end of any round I choose. I’ll confide in you
+because you are my countrymen and guests, even if you have assaulted my
+adopted shores with the worst system of noises ever set to music.
+
+“‘My job is private secretary to the president of this republic; and my
+duties are running it. I’m not headlined in the bills, but I’m the
+mustard in the salad dressing just the same. There isn’t a law goes
+before Congress, there isn’t a concession granted, there isn’t an
+import duty levied but what H. P. Mellinger he cooks and seasons it. In
+the front office I fill the president’s inkstand and search visiting
+statesmen for dirks and dynamite; but in the back room I dictate the
+policy of the government. You’d never guess in the world how I got my
+pull. It’s the only graft of its kind on earth. I’ll put you wise. You
+remember the old top-liner in the copy book—“Honesty is the Best
+Policy”? That’s it. I’m working honesty for a graft. I’m the only
+honest man in the republic. The government knows it; the people know
+it; the boodlers know it; the foreign investors know it. I make the
+government keep its faith. If a man is promised a job he gets it. If
+outside capital buys a concession it gets the goods. I run a monopoly
+of square dealing here. There’s no competition. If Colonel Diogenes
+were to flash his lantern in this precinct he’d have my address inside
+of two minutes. There isn’t big money in it, but it’s a sure thing, and
+lets a man sleep of nights.’
+
+“Thus Homer P. Mellinger made oration to me and Henry Horsecollar. And,
+later, he divested himself of this remark:
+
+“‘Boys, I’m to hold a _soirée_ this evening with a gang of leading
+citizens, and I want your assistance. You bring the musical corn
+sheller and give the affair the outside appearance of a function.
+There’s important business on hand, but it mustn’t show. I can talk to
+you people. I’ve been pained for years on account of not having anybody
+to blow off and brag to. I get homesick sometimes, and I’d swap the
+entire perquisites of office for just one hour to have a stein and a
+caviare sandwich somewhere on Thirty-fourth Street, and stand and watch
+the street cars go by, and smell the peanut roaster at old Giuseppe’s
+fruit stand.’
+
+“‘Yes,’ said I, ‘there’s fine caviare at Billy Renfrew’s café, corner
+of Thirty-fourth and—’
+
+“‘God knows it,’ interrupts Mellinger, ‘and if you’d told me you knew
+Billy Renfrew I’d have invented tons of ways of making you happy. Billy
+was my side-kicker in New York. There is a man who never knew what
+crooked was. Here I am working Honesty for a graft, but that man loses
+money on it. Carrambos! I get sick at times of this country.
+Everything’s rotten. From the executive down to the coffee pickers,
+they’re plotting to down each other and skin their friends. If a mule
+driver takes off his hat to an official, that man figures it out that
+he’s a popular idol, and sets his pegs to stir up a revolution and
+upset the administration. It’s one of my little chores as private
+secretary to smell out these revolutions and affix the kibosh before
+they break out and scratch the paint off the government property.
+That’s why I’m down here now in this mildewed coast town. The governor
+of the district and his crew are plotting to uprise. I’ve got every one
+of their names, and they’re invited to listen to the phonograph
+to-night, compliments of H. P. M. That’s the way I’ll get them in a
+bunch, and things are on the programme to happen to them.’
+
+“We three were sitting at table in the cantina of the Purified Saints.
+Mellinger poured out wine, and was looking some worried; I was
+thinking.
+
+“‘They’re a sharp crowd,’ he says, kind of fretful. ‘They’re
+capitalized by a foreign syndicate after rubber, and they’re loaded to
+the muzzle for bribing. I’m sick,’ goes on Mellinger, ‘of comic opera.
+I want to smell East River and wear suspenders again. At times I feel
+like throwing up my job, but I’m d——n fool enough to be sort of proud
+of it. “There’s Mellinger,” they say here. “_Por Dios!_ you can’t touch
+him with a million.” I’d like to take that record back and show it to
+Billy Renfrew some day; and that tightens my grip whenever I see a fat
+thing that I could corral just by winking one eye—and losing my graft.
+By ——, they can’t monkey with me. They know it. What money I get I make
+honest and spend it. Some day I’ll make a pile and go back and eat
+caviare with Billy. To-night I’ll show you how to handle a bunch of
+corruptionists. I’ll show them what Mellinger, private secretary, means
+when you spell it with the cotton and tissue paper off.’
+
+“Mellinger appears shaky, and breaks his glass against the neck of the
+bottle.
+
+“I says to myself, ‘White man, if I’m not mistaken there’s been a bait
+laid out where the tail of your eye could see it.’
+
+“That night, according to arrangements, me and Henry took the
+phonograph to a room in a ’dobe house in a dirty side street, where the
+grass was knee high. ’Twas a long room, lit with smoky oil lamps. There
+was plenty of chairs, and a table at the back end. We set the
+phonograph on the table. Mellinger was there, walking up and down,
+disturbed in his predicaments. He chewed cigars and spat ’em out, and
+he bit the thumb nail of his left hand.
+
+“By and by the invitations to the musicale came sliding in by pairs and
+threes and spade flushes. Their colour was of a diversity, running from
+a three-days’ smoked meerschaum to a patent-leather polish. They were
+as polite as wax, being devastated with enjoyments to give Señor
+Mellinger the good evenings. I understood their Spanish talk—I ran a
+pumping engine two years in a Mexican silver mine, and had it pat—but I
+never let on.
+
+“Maybe fifty of ’em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king
+bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door, and
+escorted him to the grand stand. When I saw that Latin man I knew that
+Mellinger, private secretary, had all the dances on his card taken.
+That was a big, squashy man, the colour of a rubber overshoe, and he
+had an eye like a head waiter’s.
+
+“Mellinger explained, fluent, in the Castilian idioms, that his soul
+was disconcerted with joy at introducing to his respected friends
+America’s greatest invention, the wonder of the age. Henry got the cue
+and run on an elegant brass-band record and the festivities became
+initiated. The governor man had a bit of English under his hat, and
+when the music was choked off he says:
+
+“‘Ver-r-ree fine. _Gr-r-r-r-racias_, the American gentleemen, the so
+esplendeed moosic as to playee.’
+
+“The table was a long one, and Henry and me sat at the end of it next
+the wall. The governor sat at the other end. Homer P. Mellinger stood
+at the side of it. I was just wondering how Mellinger was going to
+handle his crowd, when the home talent suddenly opened the services.
+
+“That governor man was suitable for uprisings and policies. I judge he
+was a ready kind of man, who took his own time. Yes, he was full of
+attention and immediateness. He leaned his hands on the table and
+imposed his face toward the secretary man.
+
+“‘Do the American señors understand Spanish?’ he asks in his native
+accents.
+
+“‘They do not,’ says Mellinger.
+
+“‘Then listen,’ goes on the Latin man, prompt. ‘The musics are of
+sufficient prettiness, but not of necessity. Let us speak of business.
+I well know why we are here, since I observe my compatriots. You had a
+whisper yesterday, Señor Mellinger, of our proposals. To-night we will
+speak out. We know that you stand in the president’s favour, and we
+know your influence. The government will be changed. We know the worth
+of your services. We esteem your friendship and aid so much
+that’—Mellinger raises his hand, but the governor man bottles him up.
+‘Do not speak until I have done.’
+
+“The governor man then draws a package wrapped in paper from his
+pocket, and lays it on the table by Mellinger’s hand.
+
+“‘In that you will find fifty thousand dollars in money of your
+country. You can do nothing against us, but you can be worth that for
+us. Go back to the capital and obey our instructions. Take that money
+now. We trust you. You will find with it a paper giving in detail the
+work you will be expected to do for us. Do not have the unwiseness to
+refuse.’
+
+“The governor man paused, with his eyes fixed on Mellinger, full of
+expressions and observances. I looked at Mellinger, and was glad Billy
+Renfrew couldn’t see him then. The sweat was popping out on his
+forehead, and he stood dumb, tapping the little package with the ends
+of his fingers. The colorado-maduro gang was after his graft. He had
+only to change his politics, and stuff five fingers in his inside
+pocket.
+
+“Henry whispers to me and wants the pause in the programme interpreted.
+I whisper back: ‘H. P. is up against a bribe, senator’s size, and the
+coons have got him going.’ I saw Mellinger’s hand moving closer to the
+package. ‘He’s weakening,’ I whispered to Henry. ‘We’ll remind him,’
+says Henry, ‘of the peanut-roaster on Thirty-fourth Street, New York.’
+
+“Henry stooped down and got a record from the basketful we’d brought,
+slid it in the phonograph, and started her off. It was a cornet solo,
+very neat and beautiful, and the name of it was ‘Home, Sweet Home.’ Not
+one of them fifty odd men in the room moved while it was playing, and
+the governor man kept his eyes steady on Mellinger. I saw Mellinger’s
+head go up little by little, and his hand came creeping away from the
+package. Not until the last note sounded did anybody stir. And then
+Homer P. Mellinger takes up the bundle of boodle and slams it in the
+governor man’s face.
+
+“‘That’s my answer,’ says Mellinger, private secretary, ‘and there’ll
+be another in the morning. I have proofs of conspiracy against every
+man of you. The show is over, gentlemen.’
+
+“‘There’s one more act,’ puts in the governor man. ‘You are a servant,
+I believe, employed by the president to copy letters and answer raps at
+the door. I am governor here. _Señores_, I call upon you in the name of
+the cause to seize this man.’
+
+“That brindled gang of conspirators shoved back their chairs and
+advanced in force. I could see where Mellinger had made a mistake in
+massing his enemy so as to make a grand-stand play. I think he made
+another one, too; but we can pass that, Mellinger’s idea of a graft and
+mine being different, according to estimations and points of view.
+
+“There was only one window and door in that room, and they were in the
+front end. Here was fifty odd Latin men coming in a bunch to obstruct
+the legislation of Mellinger. You may say there were three of us, for
+me and Henry, simultaneous, declared New York City and the Cherokee
+Nation in sympathy with the weaker party.
+
+“Then it was that Henry Horsecollar rose to a point of disorder and
+intervened, showing, admirable, the advantages of education as applied
+to the American Indian’s natural intellect and native refinement. He
+stood up and smoothed back his hair on each side with his hands as you
+have seen little girls do when they play.
+
+“‘Get behind me, both of you,’ says Henry.
+
+“‘What’s it to be, chief?’ I asked.
+
+“‘I’m going to buck centre,’ says Henry, in his football idioms. ‘There
+isn’t a tackle in the lot of them. Follow me close, and rush the game.’
+
+“Then that cultured Red Man exhaled an arrangement of sounds with his
+mouth that made the Latin aggregation pause, with thoughtfulness and
+hesitations. The matter of his proclamation seemed to be a co-operation
+of the Carlisle war-whoop with the Cherokee college yell. He went at
+the chocolate team like a bean out of a little boy’s nigger shooter.
+His right elbow laid out the governor man on the gridiron, and he made
+a lane the length of the crowd so wide that a woman could have carried
+a step-ladder through it without striking against anything. All
+Mellinger and me had to do was to follow.
+
+“It took us just three minutes to get out of that street around to
+military headquarters, where Mellinger had things his own way. A
+colonel and a battalion of bare-toed infantry turned out and went back
+to the scene of the musicale with us, but the conspirator gang was
+gone. But we recaptured the phonograph with honours of war, and marched
+back to the _cuartel_ with it playing ‘All Coons Look Alike to Me.’
+
+“The next day Mellinger takes me and Henry to one side, and begins to
+shed tens and twenties.
+
+“‘I want to buy that phonograph,’ says he. ‘I liked that last tune it
+played at the _soirée_.’
+
+“‘This is more money than the machine is worth,’ says I.
+
+“‘’Tis government expense money,’ says Mellinger. ‘The government pays
+for it, and it’s getting the tune-grinder cheap.’
+
+“Me and Henry knew that pretty well. We knew that it had saved Homer P.
+Mellinger’s graft when he was on the point of losing it; but we never
+let him know we knew it.
+
+“‘Now you boys better slide off further down the coast for a while,’
+says Mellinger, ‘till I get the screws put on these fellows here. If
+you don’t they’ll give you trouble. And if you ever happen to see Billy
+Renfrew again before I do, tell him I’m coming back to New York as soon
+as I can make a stake—honest.’
+
+“Me and Henry laid low until the day the steamer came back. When we saw
+the captain’s boat on the beach we went down and stood in the edge of
+the water. The captain grinned when he saw us.
+
+“‘I told you you’d be waiting,’ he says. ‘Where’s the Hamburger
+machine?’
+
+“‘It stays behind,’ I says, ‘to play “Home, Sweet Home.”’
+
+“‘I told you so,’ says the captain again. ‘Climb in the boat.’
+
+“And that,” said Keogh, “is the way me and Henry Horsecollar introduced
+the phonograph into this country. Henry went back to the States, but
+I’ve been rummaging around in the tropics ever since. They say
+Mellinger never travelled a mile after that without his phonograph. I
+guess it kept him reminded about his graft whenever he saw the siren
+voice of the boodler tip him the wink with a bribe in its hand.”
+
+“I suppose he’s taking it home with him as a souvenir,” remarked the
+consul.
+
+“Not as a souvenir,” said Keogh. “He’ll need two of ’em in New York,
+running day and night.”
+
+
+
+
+VII
+MONEY MAZE
+
+
+The new administration of Anchuria entered upon its duties and
+privileges with enthusiasm. Its first act was to send an agent to
+Coralio with imperative orders to recover, if possible, the sum of
+money ravished from the treasury by the ill-fated Miraflores.
+
+Colonel Emilio Falcon, the private secretary of Losada, the new
+president, was despatched from the capital upon this important mission.
+
+The position of private secretary to a tropical president is a
+responsible one. He must be a diplomat, a spy, a ruler of men, a
+body-guard to his chief, and a smeller-out of plots and nascent
+revolutions. Often he is the power behind the throne, the dictator of
+policy; and a president chooses him with a dozen times the care with
+which he selects a matrimonial mate.
+
+Colonel Falcon, a handsome and urbane gentleman of Castilian courtesy
+and débonnaire manners, came to Coralio with the task before him of
+striking upon the cold trail of the lost money. There he conferred with
+the military authorities, who had received instructions to co-operate
+with him in the search.
+
+Colonel Falcon established his headquarters in one of the rooms of the
+Casa Morena. Here for a week he held informal sittings—much as if he
+were a kind of unified grand jury—and summoned before him all those
+whose testimony might illumine the financial tragedy that had
+accompanied the less momentous one of the late president’s death.
+
+Two or three who were thus examined, among whom was the barber Estebán,
+declared that they had identified the body of the president before its
+burial.
+
+“Of a truth,” testified Estebán before the mighty secretary, “it was
+he, the president. Consider!—how could I shave a man and not see his
+face? He sent for me to shave him in a small house. He had a beard very
+black and thick. Had I ever seen the president before? Why not? I saw
+him once ride forth in a carriage from the _vapor_ in Solitas. When I
+shaved him he gave me a gold piece, and said there was to be no talk.
+But I am a Liberal—I am devoted to my country—and I spake of these
+things to Señor Goodwin.”
+
+“It is known,” said Colonel Falcon, smoothly, “that the late President
+took with him an American leather valise, containing a large amount of
+money. Did you see that?”
+
+“_De veras_—no,” Estebán answered. “The light in the little house was
+but a small lamp by which I could scarcely see to shave the President.
+Such a thing there may have been, but I did not see it. No. Also in the
+room was a young lady—a señorita of much beauty—that I could see even
+in so small a light. But the money, señor, or the thing in which it was
+carried—that I did not see.”
+
+The _comandante_ and other officers gave testimony that they had been
+awakened and alarmed by the noise of a pistol-shot in the Hotel de los
+Estranjeros. Hurrying thither to protect the peace and dignity of the
+republic, they found a man lying dead, with a pistol clutched in his
+hand. Beside him was a young woman, weeping sorely. Señor Goodwin was
+also in the room when they entered it. But of the valise of money they
+saw nothing.
+
+Madame Timotea Ortiz, the proprietress of the hotel in which the game
+of Fox-in-the-Morning had been played out, told of the coming of the
+two guests to her house.
+
+“To my house they came,” said she—“one _señor_, not quite old, and one
+_señorita_ of sufficient handsomeness. They desired not to eat or to
+drink—not even of my _aguardiente_, which is the best. To their rooms
+they ascended—_Numero Nueve_ and _Numero Diez_. Later came Señor
+Goodwin, who ascended to speak with them. Then I heard a great noise
+like that of a _canon_, and they said that the _pobre Presidente_ had
+shot himself. _Está bueno._ I saw nothing of money or of the thing you
+call _veliz_ that you say he carried it in.”
+
+Colonel Falcon soon came to the reasonable conclusion that if anyone in
+Coralio could furnish a clue to the vanished money, Frank Goodwin must
+be the man. But the wise secretary pursued a different course in
+seeking information from the American. Goodwin was a powerful friend to
+the new administration, and one who was not to be carelessly dealt with
+in respect to either his honesty or his courage. Even the private
+secretary of His Excellency hesitated to have this rubber prince and
+mahogany baron haled before him as a common citizen of Anchuria. So he
+sent Goodwin a flowery epistle, each word-petal dripping with honey,
+requesting the favour of an interview. Goodwin replied with an
+invitation to dinner at his own house.
+
+Before the hour named the American walked over to the Casa Morena, and
+greeted his guest frankly and friendly. Then the two strolled, in the
+cool of the afternoon, to Goodwin’s home in the environs.
+
+The American left Colonel Falcon in a big, cool, shadowed room with a
+floor of inlaid and polished woods that any millionaire in the States
+would have envied, excusing himself for a few minutes. He crossed a
+_patio_, shaded with deftly arranged awnings and plants, and entered a
+long room looking upon the sea in the opposite wing of the house. The
+broad jalousies were opened wide, and the ocean breeze flowed in
+through the room, an invisible current of coolness and health.
+Goodwin’s wife sat near one of the windows, making a water-color sketch
+of the afternoon seascape.
+
+Here was a woman who looked to be happy. And more—she looked to be
+content. Had a poet been inspired to pen just similes concerning her
+favour, he would have likened her full, clear eyes, with their
+white-encircled, gray irises, to moonflowers. With none of the
+goddesses whose traditional charms have become coldly classic would the
+discerning rhymester have compared her. She was purely Paradisaic, not
+Olympian. If you can imagine Eve, after the eviction, beguiling the
+flaming warriors and serenely re-entering the Garden, you will have
+her. Just so human, and still so harmonious with Eden seemed Mrs.
+Goodwin.
+
+When her husband entered she looked up, and her lips curved and parted;
+her eyelids fluttered twice or thrice—a movement remindful (Poesy
+forgive us!) of the tail-wagging of a faithful dog—and a little ripple
+went through her like the commotion set up in a weeping willow by a
+puff of wind. Thus she ever acknowledged his coming, were it twenty
+times a day. If they who sometimes sat over their wine in Coralio,
+reshaping old, diverting stories of the madcap career of Isabel
+Guilbert, could have seen the wife of Frank Goodwin that afternoon in
+the estimable aura of her happy wifehood, they might have disbelieved,
+or have agreed to forget, those graphic annals of the life of the one
+for whom their president gave up his country and his honour.
+
+“I have brought a guest to dinner,” said Goodwin. “One Colonel Falcon,
+from San Mateo. He is come on government business. I do not think you
+will care to see him, so I prescribe for you one of those convenient
+and indisputable feminine headaches.”
+
+“He has come to inquire about the lost money, has he not?” asked Mrs.
+Goodwin, going on with her sketch.
+
+“A good guess!” acknowledged Goodwin. “He has been holding an
+inquisition among the natives for three days. I am next on his list of
+witnesses, but as he feels shy about dragging one of Uncle Sam’s
+subjects before him, he consents to give it the outward appearance of a
+social function. He will apply the torture over my own wine and
+provender.”
+
+“Has he found anyone who saw the valise of money?”
+
+“Not a soul. Even Madama Ortiz, whose eyes are so sharp for the sight
+of a revenue official, does not remember that there was any baggage.”
+
+Mrs. Goodwin laid down her brush and sighed.
+
+“I am so sorry, Frank,” she said, “that they are giving you so much
+trouble about the money. But we can’t let them know about it, can we?”
+
+“Not without doing our intelligence a great injustice,” said Goodwin,
+with a smile and a shrug that he had picked up from the natives.
+“_Americano_, though I am, they would have me in the _calaboza_ in half
+an hour if they knew we had appropriated that valise. No; we must
+appear as ignorant about the money as the other ignoramuses in
+Coralio.”
+
+“Do you think that this man they have sent suspects you?” she asked,
+with a little pucker of her brows.
+
+“He’d better not,” said the American, carelessly. “It’s lucky that no
+one caught a sight of the valise except myself. As I was in the rooms
+when the shot was fired, it is not surprising that they should want to
+investigate my part in the affair rather closely. But there’s no cause
+for alarm. This colonel is down on the list of events for a good
+dinner, with a dessert of American ‘bluff’ that will end the matter, I
+think.”
+
+Mrs. Goodwin rose and walked to the window. Goodwin followed and stood
+by her side. She leaned to him, and rested in the protection of his
+strength, as she had always rested since that dark night on which he
+had first made himself her tower of refuge. Thus they stood for a
+little while.
+
+Straight through the lavish growth of tropical branch and leaf and vine
+that confronted them had been cunningly trimmed a vista, that ended at
+the cleared environs of Coralio, on the banks of the mangrove swamp. At
+the other end of the aerial tunnel they could see the grave and wooden
+headpiece that bore the name of the unhappy President Miraflores. From
+this window when the rains forbade the open, and from the green and
+shady slopes of Goodwin’s fruitful lands when the skies were smiling,
+his wife was wont to look upon that grave with a gentle sadness that
+was now scarcely a mar to her happiness.
+
+“I loved him so, Frank!” she said, “even after that terrible flight and
+its awful ending. And you have been so good to me, and have made me so
+happy. It has all grown into such a strange puzzle. If they were to
+find out that we got the money do you think they would force you to
+make the amount good to the government?”
+
+“They would undoubtedly try,” answered Goodwin. “You are right about
+its being a puzzle. And it must remain a puzzle to Falcon and all his
+countrymen until it solves itself. You and I, who know more than anyone
+else, only know half of the solution. We must not let even a hint about
+this money get abroad. Let them come to the theory that the president
+concealed it in the mountains during his journey, or that he found
+means to ship it out of the country before he reached Coralio. I don’t
+think that Falcon suspects me. He is making a close investigation,
+according to his orders, but he will find out nothing.”
+
+Thus they spake together. Had anyone overheard or overseen them as they
+discussed the lost funds of Anchuria there would have been a second
+puzzle presented. For upon the faces and in the bearing of each of them
+was visible (if countenances are to be believed) Saxon honesty and
+pride and honourable thoughts. In Goodwin’s steady eye and firm
+lineaments, moulded into material shape by the inward spirit of
+kindness and generosity and courage, there was nothing reconcilable
+with his words.
+
+As for his wife, physiognomy championed her even in the face of their
+accusive talk. Nobility was in her guise; purity was in her glance. The
+devotion that she manifested had not even the appearance of that
+feeling that now and then inspires a woman to share the guilt of her
+partner out of the pathetic greatness of her love. No, there was a
+discrepancy here between what the eye would have seen and the ear have
+heard.
+
+Dinner was served to Goodwin and his guest in the _patio_, under cool
+foliage and flowers. The American begged the illustrious secretary to
+excuse the absence of Mrs. Goodwin, who was suffering, he said, from a
+headache brought on by a slight _calentura_.
+
+After the meal they lingered, according to the custom, over their
+coffee and cigars. Colonel Falcon, with true Castilian delicacy, waited
+for his host to open the question that they had met to discuss. He had
+not long to wait. As soon as the cigars were lighted, the American
+cleared the way by inquiring whether the secretary’s investigations in
+the town had furnished him with any clue to the lost funds.
+
+“I have found no one yet,” admitted Colonel Falcon, “who even had sight
+of the valise or the money. Yet I have persisted. It has been proven in
+the capital that President Miraflores set out from San Mateo with one
+hundred thousand dollars belonging to the government, accompanied by
+_Señorita_ Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer. The Government,
+officially and personally, is loath to believe,” concluded Colonel
+Falcon, with a smile, “that our late President’s tastes would have
+permitted him to abandon on the route, as excess baggage, either of the
+desirable articles with which his flight was burdened.”
+
+“I suppose you would like to hear what I have to say about the affair,”
+said Goodwin, coming directly to the point. “It will not require many
+words.
+
+“On that night, with others of our friends here, I was keeping a
+lookout for the president, having been notified of his flight by a
+telegram in our national cipher from Englehart, one of our leaders in
+the capital. About ten o’clock that night I saw a man and a woman
+hurrying along the streets. They went to the Hotel de los Estranjeros,
+and engaged rooms. I followed them upstairs, leaving Estebán, who had
+come up, to watch outside. The barber had told me that he had shaved
+the beard from the president’s face that night; therefore I was
+prepared, when I entered the rooms, to find him with a smooth face.
+When I apprehended him in the name of the people he drew a pistol and
+shot himself instantly. In a few minutes many officers and citizens
+were on the spot. I suppose you have been informed of the subsequent
+facts.”
+
+Goodwin paused. Losada’s agent maintained an attitude of waiting, as if
+he expected a continuance.
+
+“And now,” went on the American, looking steadily into the eyes of the
+other man, and giving each word a deliberate emphasis, “you will oblige
+me by attending carefully to what I have to add. I saw no valise or
+receptacle of any kind, or any money belonging to the Republic of
+Anchuria. If President Miraflores decamped with any funds belonging to
+the treasury of this country, or to himself, or to anyone else, I saw
+no trace of it in the house or elsewhere, at that time or at any other.
+Does that statement cover the ground of the inquiry you wished to make
+of me?”
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed, and described a fluent curve with his cigar. His
+duty was performed. Goodwin was not to be disputed. He was a loyal
+supporter of the government, and enjoyed the full confidence of the new
+president. His rectitude had been the capital that had brought him
+fortune in Anchuria, just as it had formed the lucrative “graft” of
+Mellinger, the secretary of Miraflores.
+
+“I thank you, _Señor_ Goodwin,” said Falcon, “for speaking plainly.
+Your word will be sufficient for the president. But, _Señor_ Goodwin, I
+am instructed to pursue every clue that presents itself in this matter.
+There is one that I have not yet touched upon. Our friends in France,
+_señor_, have a saying, ‘_Cherchez la femme_,’ when there is a mystery
+without a clue. But here we do not have to search. The woman who
+accompanied the late President in his flight must surely—”
+
+“I must interrupt you there,” interposed Goodwin. “It is true that when
+I entered the hotel for the purpose of intercepting President
+Miraflores I found a lady there. I must beg of you to remember that
+that lady is now my wife. I speak for her as I do for myself. She knows
+nothing of the fate of the valise or of the money that you are seeking.
+You will say to his excellency that I guarantee her innocence. I do not
+need to add to you, Colonel Falcon, that I do not care to have her
+questioned or disturbed.”
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed again.
+
+“_Por supuesto_, no!” he cried. And to indicate that the inquiry was
+ended he added: “And now, _señor_, let me beg of you to show me that
+sea view from your _galeria_ of which you spoke. I am a lover of the
+sea.”
+
+In the early evening Goodwin walked back to the town with his guest,
+leaving him at the corner of the Calle Grande. As he was returning
+homeward one “Beelzebub” Blythe, with the air of a courtier and the
+outward aspect of a scarecrow, pounced upon him hopefully from the door
+of a _pulperia_.
+
+Blythe had been re-christened “Beelzebub” as an acknowledgment of the
+greatness of his fall. Once in some distant Paradise Lost, he had
+foregathered with the angels of the earth. But Fate had hurled him
+headlong down to the tropics, where flamed in his bosom a fire that was
+seldom quenched. In Coralio they called him a beachcomber; but he was,
+in reality, a categorical idealist who strove to anamorphosize the dull
+verities of life by the means of brandy and rum. As Beelzebub, himself,
+might have held in his clutch with unwitting tenacity his harp or crown
+during his tremendous fall, so his namesake had clung to his
+gold-rimmed eyeglasses as the only souvenir of his lost estate. These
+he wore with impressiveness and distinction while he combed beaches and
+extracted toll from his friends. By some mysterious means he kept his
+drink-reddened face always smoothly shaven. For the rest he sponged
+gracefully upon whomsoever he could for enough to keep him pretty
+drunk, and sheltered from the rains and night dews.
+
+“Hallo, Goodwin!” called the derelict, airily. “I was hoping I’d strike
+you. I wanted to see you particularly. Suppose we go where we can talk.
+Of course you know there’s a chap down here looking up the money old
+Miraflores lost.”
+
+“Yes,” said Goodwin, “I’ve been talking with him. Let’s go into
+Espada’s place. I can spare you ten minutes.”
+
+They went into the _pulperia_ and sat at a little table upon stools
+with rawhide tops.
+
+“Have a drink?” said Goodwin.
+
+“They can’t bring it too quickly,” said Blythe. “I’ve been in a drought
+ever since morning. Hi—_muchacho!—el aguardiente por acá_.”
+
+“Now, what do you want to see me about?” asked Goodwin, when the drinks
+were before them.
+
+“Confound it, old man,” drawled Blythe, “why do you spoil a golden
+moment like this with business? I wanted to see you—well, this has the
+preference.” He gulped down his brandy, and gazed longingly into the
+empty glass.
+
+“Have another?” suggested Goodwin.
+
+“Between gentlemen,” said the fallen angel, “I don’t quite like your
+use of that word ‘another.’ It isn’t quite delicate. But the concrete
+idea that the word represents is not displeasing.”
+
+The glasses were refilled. Blythe sipped blissfully from his, as he
+began to enter the state of a true idealist.
+
+“I must trot along in a minute or two,” hinted Goodwin. “Was there
+anything in particular?”
+
+Blythe did not reply at once.
+
+“Old Losada would make it a hot country,” he remarked at length, “for
+the man who swiped that gripsack of treasury boodle, don’t you think?”
+
+“Undoubtedly, he would,” agreed Goodwin calmly, as he rose leisurely to
+his feet. “I’ll be running over to the house now, old man. Mrs. Goodwin
+is alone. There was nothing important you had to say, was there?”
+
+“That’s all,” said Blythe. “Unless you wouldn’t mind sending in another
+drink from the bar as you go out. Old Espada has closed my account to
+profit and loss. And pay for the lot, will you, like a good fellow?”
+
+“All right,” said Goodwin. “_Buenas noches._”
+
+“Beelzebub” Blythe lingered over his cups, polishing his eyeglasses
+with a disreputable handkerchief.
+
+“I thought I could do it, but I couldn’t,” he muttered to himself after
+a time. “A gentleman can’t blackmail the man that he drinks with.”
+
+
+
+
+VIII
+THE ADMIRAL
+
+
+Spilled milk draws few tears from an Anchurian administration. Many are
+its lacteal sources; and the clocks’ hands point forever to milking
+time. Even the rich cream skimmed from the treasury by the bewitched
+Miraflores did not cause the newly-installed patriots to waste time in
+unprofitable regrets. The government philosophically set about
+supplying the deficiency by increasing the import duties and by
+“suggesting” to wealthy private citizens that contributions according
+to their means would be considered patriotic and in order. Prosperity
+was expected to attend the reign of Losada, the new president. The
+ousted office-holders and military favourites organized a new “Liberal”
+party, and began to lay their plans for a re-succession. Thus the game
+of Anchurian politics began, like a Chinese comedy, to unwind slowly
+its serial length. Here and there Mirth peeps for an instant from the
+wings and illumines the florid lines.
+
+A dozen quarts of champagne in conjunction with an informal sitting of
+the president and his cabinet led to the establishment of the navy and
+the appointment of Felipe Carrera as its admiral.
+
+Next to the champagne the credit of the appointment belongs to Don
+Sabas Placido, the newly confirmed Minister of War.
+
+The president had requested a convention of his cabinet for the
+discussion of questions politic and for the transaction of certain
+routine matters of state. The session had been signally tedious; the
+business and the wine prodigiously dry. A sudden, prankish humour of
+Don Sabas, impelling him to the deed, spiced the grave affairs of state
+with a whiff of agreeable playfulness.
+
+In the dilatory order of business had come a bulletin from the coast
+department of Orilla del Mar reporting the seizure by the custom-house
+officers at the town of Coralio of the sloop _Estrella del Noche_ and
+her cargo of drygoods, patent medicines, granulated sugar and
+three-star brandy. Also six Martini rifles and a barrel of American
+whisky. Caught in the act of smuggling, the sloop with its cargo was
+now, according to law, the property of the republic.
+
+The Collector of Customs, in making his report, departed from the
+conventional forms so far as to suggest that the confiscated vessel be
+converted to the use of the government. The prize was the first capture
+to the credit of the department in ten years. The collector took
+opportunity to pat his department on the back.
+
+It often happened that government officers required transportation from
+point to point along the coast, and means were usually lacking.
+Furthermore, the sloop could be manned by a loyal crew and employed as
+a coast guard to discourage the pernicious art of smuggling. The
+collector also ventured to nominate one to whom the charge of the boat
+could be safely intrusted—a young man of Coralio, Felipe Carrera—not,
+be it understood, one of extreme wisdom, but loyal and the best sailor
+along the coast.
+
+It was upon this hint that the Minister of War acted, executing a rare
+piece of drollery that so enlivened the tedium of executive session.
+
+In the constitution of this small, maritime banana republic was a
+forgotten section that provided for the maintenance of a navy. This
+provision—with many other wiser ones—had lain inert since the
+establishment of the republic. Anchuria had no navy and had no use for
+one. It was characteristic of Don Sabas—a man at once merry, learned,
+whimsical and audacious—that he should have disturbed the dust of this
+musty and sleeping statute to increase the humour of the world by so
+much as a smile from his indulgent colleagues.
+
+With delightful mock seriousness the Minister of War proposed the
+creation of a navy. He argued its need and the glories it might achieve
+with such gay and witty zeal that the travesty overcame with its humour
+even the swart dignity of President Losada himself.
+
+The champagne was bubbling trickily in the veins of the mercurial
+statesmen. It was not the custom of the grave governors of Anchuria to
+enliven their sessions with a beverage so apt to cast a veil of
+disparagement over sober affairs. The wine had been a thoughtful
+compliment tendered by the agent of the Vesuvius Fruit Company as a
+token of amicable relations—and certain consummated deals—between that
+company and the republic of Anchuria.
+
+The jest was carried to its end. A formidable, official document was
+prepared, encrusted with chromatic seals and jaunty with fluttering
+ribbons, bearing the florid signatures of state. This commission
+conferred upon el Señor Don Felipe Carrera the title of Flag Admiral of
+the Republic of Anchuria. Thus within the space of a few minutes and
+the dominion of a dozen “extra dry,” the country took its place among
+the naval powers of the world, and Felipe Carrera became entitled to a
+salute of nineteen guns whenever he might enter port.
+
+The southern races are lacking in that particular kind of humour that
+finds entertainment in the defects and misfortunes bestowed by Nature.
+Owing to this defect in their constitution they are not moved to
+laughter (as are their northern brothers) by the spectacle of the
+deformed, the feeble-minded or the insane.
+
+Felipe Carrera was sent upon earth with but half his wits. Therefore,
+the people of Coralio called him “_El pobrecito loco_”—“the poor little
+crazed one”—saying that God had sent but half of him to earth,
+retaining the other half.
+
+A sombre youth, glowering, and speaking only at the rarest times,
+Felipe was but negatively “loco.” On shore he generally refused all
+conversation. He seemed to know that he was badly handicapped on land,
+where so many kinds of understanding are needed; but on the water his
+one talent set him equal with most men. Few sailors whom God had
+carefully and completely made could handle a sailboat as well. Five
+points nearer the wind than even the best of them he could sail his
+sloop. When the elements raged and set other men to cowering, the
+deficiencies of Felipe seemed of little importance. He was a perfect
+sailor, if an imperfect man. He owned no boat, but worked among the
+crews of the schooners and sloops that skimmed the coast, trading and
+freighting fruit out to the steamers where there was no harbour. It was
+through his famous skill and boldness on the sea, as well as for the
+pity felt for his mental imperfections, that he was recommended by the
+collector as a suitable custodian of the captured sloop.
+
+When the outcome of Don Sabas’ little pleasantry arrived in the form of
+the imposing and preposterous commission, the collector smiled. He had
+not expected such prompt and overwhelming response to his
+recommendation. He despatched a _muchacho_ at once to fetch the future
+admiral.
+
+The collector waited in his official quarters. His office was in the
+Calle Grande, and the sea breezes hummed through its windows all day.
+The collector, in white linen and canvas shoes, philandered with papers
+on an antique desk. A parrot, perched on a pen rack, seasoned the
+official tedium with a fire of choice Castilian imprecations. Two rooms
+opened into the collector’s. In one the clerical force of young men of
+variegated complexions transacted with glitter and parade their several
+duties. Through the open door of the other room could be seen a bronze
+babe, guiltless of clothing, that rollicked upon the floor. In a grass
+hammock a thin woman, tinted a pale lemon, played a guitar and swung
+contentedly in the breeze. Thus surrounded by the routine of his high
+duties and the visible tokens of agreeable domesticity, the collector’s
+heart was further made happy by the power placed in his hands to
+brighten the fortunes of the “innocent” Felipe.
+
+Felipe came and stood before the collector. He was a lad of twenty, not
+ill-favoured in looks, but with an expression of distant and pondering
+vacuity. He wore white cotton trousers, down the seams of which he had
+sewed red stripes with some vague aim at military decoration. A flimsy
+blue shirt fell open at his throat; his feet were bare; he held in his
+hand the cheapest of straw hats from the States.
+
+“Señor Carrera,” said the collector, gravely, producing the showy
+commission, “I have sent for you at the president’s bidding. This
+document that I present to you confers upon you the title of Admiral of
+this great republic, and gives you absolute command of the naval forces
+and fleet of our country. You may think, friend Felipe, that we have no
+navy—but yes! The sloop the _Estrella del Noche_, that my brave men
+captured from the coast smugglers, is to be placed under your command.
+The boat is to be devoted to the services of your country. You will be
+ready at all times to convey officials of the government to points
+along the coast where they may be obliged to visit. You will also act
+as a coast-guard to prevent, as far as you may be able, the crime of
+smuggling. You will uphold the honour and prestige of your country at
+sea, and endeavour to place Anchuria among the proudest naval powers of
+the world. These are your instructions as the Minister of War desires
+me to convey them to you. _Por Dios!_ I do not know how all this is to
+be accomplished, for not one word did his letter contain in respect to
+a crew or to the expenses of this navy. Perhaps you are to provide a
+crew yourself, Señor Admiral—I do not know—but it is a very high honour
+that has descended upon you. I now hand you your commission. When you
+are ready for the boat I will give orders that she shall be made over
+into your charge. That is as far as my instructions go.”
+
+Felipe took the commission that the collector handed to him. He gazed
+through the open window at the sea for a moment, with his customary
+expression of deep but vain pondering. Then he turned without having
+spoken a word, and walked swiftly away through the hot sand of the
+street.
+
+“_Pobrecito loco!_” sighed the collector; and the parrot on the pen
+racks screeched “Loco!—loco!—loco!”
+
+The next morning a strange procession filed through the streets to the
+collector’s office. At its head was the admiral of the navy. Somewhere
+Felipe had raked together a pitiful semblance of a military uniform—a
+pair of red trousers, a dingy blue short jacket heavily ornamented with
+gold braid, and an old fatigue cap that must have been cast away by one
+of the British soldiers in Belize and brought away by Felipe on one of
+his coasting voyages. Buckled around his waist was an ancient ship’s
+cutlass contributed to his equipment by Pedro Lafitte, the baker, who
+proudly asserted its inheritance from his ancestor, the illustrious
+buccaneer. At the admiral’s heels tagged his newly-shipped crew—three
+grinning, glossy, black Caribs, bare to the waist, the sand spurting in
+showers from the spring of their naked feet.
+
+Briefly and with dignity Felipe demanded his vessel of the collector.
+And now a fresh honour awaited him. The collector’s wife, who played
+the guitar and read novels in the hammock all day, had more than a
+little romance in her placid, yellow bosom. She had found in an old
+book an engraving of a flag that purported to be the naval flag of
+Anchuria. Perhaps it had so been designed by the founders of the
+nation; but, as no navy had ever been established, oblivion had claimed
+the flag. Laboriously with her own hands she had made a flag after the
+pattern—a red cross upon a blue-and-white ground. She presented it to
+Felipe with these words: “Brave sailor, this flag is of your country.
+Be true, and defend it with your life. Go you with God.”
+
+For the first time since his appointment the admiral showed a flicker
+of emotion. He took the silken emblem, and passed his hand reverently
+over its surface. “I am the admiral,” he said to the collector’s lady.
+Being on land he could bring himself to no more exuberant expression of
+sentiment. At sea with the flag at the masthead of his navy, some more
+eloquent exposition of feelings might be forthcoming.
+
+Abruptly the admiral departed with his crew. For the next three days
+they were busy giving the _Estrella del Noche_ a new coat of white
+paint trimmed with blue. And then Felipe further adorned himself by
+fastening a handful of brilliant parrot’s plumes in his cap. Again he
+tramped with his faithful crew to the collector’s office and formally
+notified him that the sloop’s name had been changed to _El Nacional_.
+
+During the next few months the navy had its troubles. Even an admiral
+is perplexed to know what to do without any orders. But none came.
+Neither did any salaries. _El Nacional_ swung idly at anchor.
+
+When Felipe’s little store of money was exhausted he went to the
+collector and raised the question of finances.
+
+“Salaries!” exclaimed the collector, with hands raised; “_Valgame
+Dios!_ not one _centavo_ of my own pay have I received for the last
+seven months. The pay of an admiral, do you ask? _Quién sabe?_ Should
+it be less than three thousand _pesos_? _Mira!_ you will see a
+revolution in this country very soon. A good sign of it is when the
+government calls all the time for _pesos_, _pesos_, _pesos_, and pays
+none out.”
+
+Felipe left the collector’s office with a look almost of content on his
+sombre face. A revolution would mean fighting, and then the government
+would need his services. It was rather humiliating to be an admiral
+without anything to do, and have a hungry crew at your heels begging
+for _reales_ to buy plantains and tobacco with.
+
+When he returned to where his happy-go-lucky Caribs were waiting they
+sprang up and saluted, as he had drilled them to do.
+
+“Come, _muchachos_,” said the admiral; “it seems that the government is
+poor. It has no money to give us. We will earn what we need to live
+upon. Thus will we serve our country. Soon”—his heavy eyes almost
+lighted up—“it may gladly call upon us for help.”
+
+Thereafter _El Nacional_ turned out with the other coast craft and
+became a wage-earner. She worked with the lighters freighting bananas
+and oranges out to the fruit steamers that could not approach nearer
+than a mile from the shore. Surely a self-supporting navy deserves red
+letters in the budget of any nation.
+
+After earning enough at freighting to keep himself and his crew in
+provisions for a week Felipe would anchor the navy and hang about the
+little telegraph office, looking like one of the chorus of an insolvent
+comic opera troupe besieging the manager’s den. A hope for orders from
+the capital was always in his heart. That his services as admiral had
+never been called into requirement hurt his pride and patriotism. At
+every call he would inquire, gravely and expectantly, for despatches.
+The operator would pretend to make a search, and then reply:
+
+“Not yet, it seems, _Señor el Almirante—poco tiempo!_”
+
+Outside in the shade of the lime-trees the crew chewed sugar cane or
+slumbered, well content to serve a country that was contented with so
+little service.
+
+One day in the early summer the revolution predicted by the collector
+flamed out suddenly. It had long been smouldering. At the first note of
+alarm the admiral of the navy force and fleet made all sail for a
+larger port on the coast of a neighbouring republic, where he traded a
+hastily collected cargo of fruit for its value in cartridges for the
+five Martini rifles, the only guns that the navy could boast. Then to
+the telegraph office sped the admiral. Sprawling in his favourite
+corner, in his fast-decaying uniform, with his prodigious sabre
+distributed between his red legs, he waited for the long-delayed, but
+now soon expected, orders.
+
+“Not yet, _Señor el Almirante_,” the telegraph clerk would call to
+him—“_poco tiempo!_”
+
+At the answer the admiral would plump himself down with a great
+rattling of scabbard to await the infrequent tick of the little
+instrument on the table.
+
+“They will come,” would be his unshaken reply; “I am the admiral.”
+
+
+
+
+IX
+THE FLAG PARAMOUNT
+
+
+At the head of the insurgent party appeared that Hector and learned
+Theban of the southern republics, Don Sabas Placido. A traveller, a
+soldier, a poet, a scientist, a statesman and a connoisseur—the wonder
+was that he could content himself with the petty, remote life of his
+native country.
+
+“It is a whim of Placido’s,” said a friend who knew him well, “to take
+up political intrigue. It is not otherwise than as if he had come upon
+a new _tempo_ in music, a new bacillus in the air, a new scent, or
+rhyme, or explosive. He will squeeze this revolution dry of sensations,
+and a week afterward will forget it, skimming the seas of the world in
+his brigantine to add to his already world-famous collections.
+Collections of what? _Por Dios!_ of everything from postage stamps to
+prehistoric stone idols.”
+
+But, for a mere dilettante, the æsthetic Placido seemed to be creating
+a lively row. The people admired him; they were fascinated by his
+brilliancy and flattered by his taking an interest in so small a thing
+as his native country. They rallied to the call of his lieutenants in
+the capital, where (somewhat contrary to arrangements) the army
+remained faithful to the government. There was also lively skirmishing
+in the coast towns. It was rumoured that the revolution was aided by
+the Vesuvius Fruit Company, the power that forever stood with chiding
+smile and uplifted finger to keep Anchuria in the class of good
+children. Two of its steamers, the _Traveler_ and the _Salvador_, were
+known to have conveyed insurgent troops from point to point along the
+coast.
+
+As yet there had been no actual uprising in Coralio. Military law
+prevailed, and the ferment was bottled for the time. And then came the
+word that everywhere the revolutionists were encountering defeat. In
+the capital the president’s forces triumphed; and there was a rumour
+that the leaders of the revolt had been forced to fly, hotly pursued.
+
+In the little telegraph office at Coralio there was always a gathering
+of officials and loyal citizens, awaiting news from the seat of
+government. One morning the telegraph key began clicking, and presently
+the operator called, loudly: “One telegram for _el Almirante_, Don
+Señor Felipe Carrera!”
+
+There was a shuffling sound, a great rattling of tin scabbard, and the
+admiral, prompt at his spot of waiting, leaped across the room to
+receive it.
+
+The message was handed to him. Slowly spelling it out, he found it to
+be his first official order—thus running:
+
+Proceed immediately with your vessel to mouth of Rio Ruiz; transport
+beef and provisions to barracks at Alforan.
+
+
+Martinez, General.
+
+
+Small glory, to be sure, in this, his country’s first call. But it had
+called, and joy surged in the admiral’s breast. He drew his cutlass
+belt to another buckle hole, roused his dozing crew, and in a quarter
+of an hour _El Nacional_ was tacking swiftly down coast in a stiff
+landward breeze.
+
+The Rio Ruiz is a small river, emptying into the sea ten miles below
+Coralio. That portion of the coast is wild and solitary. Through a
+gorge in the Cordilleras rushes the Rio Ruiz, cold and bubbling, to
+glide, at last, with breadth and leisure, through an alluvial morass
+into the sea.
+
+In two hours _El Nacional_ entered the river’s mouth. The banks were
+crowded with a disposition of formidable trees. The sumptuous
+undergrowth of the tropics overflowed the land, and drowned itself in
+the fallow waters. Silently the sloop entered there, and met a deeper
+silence. Brilliant with greens and ochres and floral scarlets, the
+umbrageous mouth of the Rio Ruiz furnished no sound or movement save of
+the sea-going water as it purled against the prow of the vessel. Small
+chance there seemed of wresting beef or provisions from that empty
+solitude.
+
+The admiral decided to cast anchor, and, at the chain’s rattle, the
+forest was stimulated to instant and resounding uproar. The mouth of
+the Rio Ruiz had only been taking a morning nap. Parrots and baboons
+screeched and barked in the trees; a whirring and a hissing and a
+booming marked the awakening of animal life; a dark blue bulk was
+visible for an instant, as a startled tapir fought his way through the
+vines.
+
+The navy, under orders, hung in the mouth of the little river for
+hours. The crew served the dinner of shark’s fin soup, plantains, crab
+gumbo and sour wine. The admiral, with a three-foot telescope, closely
+scanned the impervious foliage fifty yards away.
+
+It was nearly sunset when a reverberating “hal-lo-o-o!” came from the
+forest to their left. It was answered; and three men, mounted upon
+mules, crashed through the tropic tangle to within a dozen yards of the
+river’s bank. There they dismounted; and one, unbuckling his belt,
+struck each mule a violent blow with his sword scabbard, so that they,
+with a fling of heels, dashed back again into the forest.
+
+Those were strange-looking men to be conveying beef and provisions. One
+was a large and exceedingly active man, of striking presence. He was of
+the purest Spanish type, with curling, gray-besprinkled, dark hair,
+blue, sparkling eyes, and the pronounced air of a _caballero grande_.
+The other two were small, brown-faced men, wearing white military
+uniforms, high riding boots and swords. The clothes of all were
+drenched, bespattered and rent by the thicket. Some stress of
+circumstance must have driven them, _diable à quatre_, through flood,
+mire and jungle.
+
+“_O-hé! Señor Almirante_,” called the large man. “Send to us your
+boat.”
+
+The dory was lowered, and Felipe, with one of the Caribs, rowed toward
+the left bank.
+
+The large man stood near the water’s brink, waist deep in the curling
+vines. As he gazed upon the scarecrow figure in the stern of the dory a
+sprightly interest beamed upon his mobile face.
+
+Months of wageless and thankless service had dimmed the admiral’s
+splendour. His red trousers were patched and ragged. Most of the bright
+buttons and yellow braid were gone from his jacket. The visor of his
+cap was torn, and depended almost to his eyes. The admiral’s feet were
+bare.
+
+“Dear admiral,” cried the large man, and his voice was like a blast
+from a horn, “I kiss your hands. I knew we could build upon your
+fidelity. You had our despatch—from General Martinez. A little nearer
+with your boat, dear Admiral. Upon these devils of shifting vines we
+stand with the smallest security.”
+
+Felipe regarded him with a stolid face.
+
+“Provisions and beef for the barracks at Alforan,” he quoted.
+
+“No fault of the butchers, _Almirante mio_, that the beef awaits you
+not. But you are come in time to save the cattle. Get us aboard your
+vessel, señor, at once. You first, _caballeros—á priesa!_ Come back for
+me. The boat is too small.”
+
+The dory conveyed the two officers to the sloop, and returned for the
+large man.
+
+“Have you so gross a thing as food, good admiral?” he cried, when
+aboard. “And, perhaps, coffee? Beef and provisions! _Nombre de Dios!_ a
+little longer and we could have eaten one of those mules that you,
+Colonel Rafael, saluted so feelingly with your sword scabbard at
+parting. Let us have food; and then we will sail—for the barracks at
+Alforan—no?”
+
+The Caribs prepared a meal, to which the three passengers of _El
+Nacional_ set themselves with famished delight. About sunset, as was
+its custom, the breeze veered and swept back from the mountains, cool
+and steady, bringing a taste of the stagnant lagoons and mangrove
+swamps that guttered the lowlands. The mainsail of the sloop was
+hoisted and swelled to it, and at that moment they heard shouts and a
+waxing clamour from the bosky profundities of the shore.
+
+“The butchers, my dear admiral,” said the large man, smiling, “too late
+for the slaughter.”
+
+Further than his orders to his crew, the admiral was saying nothing.
+The topsail and jib were spread, and the sloop glided out of the
+estuary. The large man and his companions had bestowed themselves with
+what comfort they could about the bare deck. Belike, the thing big in
+their minds had been their departure from that critical shore; and now
+that the hazard was so far reduced their thoughts were loosed to the
+consideration of further deliverance. But when they saw the sloop turn
+and fly up coast again they relaxed, satisfied with the course the
+admiral had taken.
+
+The large man sat at ease, his spirited blue eye engaged in the
+contemplation of the navy’s commander. He was trying to estimate this
+sombre and fantastic lad, whose impenetrable stolidity puzzled him.
+Himself a fugitive, his life sought, and chafing under the smart of
+defeat and failure, it was characteristic of him to transfer instantly
+his interest to the study of a thing new to him. It was like him, too,
+to have conceived and risked all upon this last desperate and madcap
+scheme—this message to a poor, crazed _fanatico_ cruising about with
+his grotesque uniform and his farcical title. But his companions had
+been at their wits’ end; escape had seemed incredible; and now he was
+pleased with the success of the plan they had called crack-brained and
+precarious.
+
+The brief, tropic twilight seemed to slide swiftly into the pearly
+splendour of a moonlit night. And now the lights of Coralio appeared,
+distributed against the darkening shore to their right. The admiral
+stood, silent, at the tiller; the Caribs, like black panthers, held the
+sheets, leaping noiselessly at his short commands. The three passengers
+were watching intently the sea before them, and when at length they
+came in sight of the bulk of a steamer lying a mile out from the town,
+with her lights radiating deep into the water, they held a sudden
+voluble and close-headed converse. The sloop was speeding as if to
+strike midway between ship and shore.
+
+The large man suddenly separated from his companions and approached the
+scarecrow at the helm.
+
+“My dear admiral,” he said, “the government has been exceedingly
+remiss. I feel all the shame for it that only its ignorance of your
+devoted service has prevented it from sustaining. An inexcusable
+oversight has been made. A vessel, a uniform and a crew worthy of your
+fidelity shall be furnished you. But just now, dear admiral, there is
+business of moment afoot. The steamer lying there is the _Salvador_. I
+and my friends desire to be conveyed to her, where we are sent on the
+government’s business. Do us the favour to shape your course
+accordingly.”
+
+Without replying, the admiral gave a sharp command, and put the tiller
+hard to port. _El Nacional_ swerved, and headed straight as an arrow’s
+course for the shore.
+
+“Do me the favour,” said the large man, a trifle restively, “to
+acknowledge, at least, that you catch the sound of my words.” It was
+possible that the fellow might be lacking in senses as well as
+intellect.
+
+The admiral emitted a croaking, harsh laugh, and spake.
+
+“They will stand you,” he said, “with your face to a wall and shoot you
+dead. That is the way they kill traitors. I knew you when you stepped
+into my boat. I have seen your picture in a book. You are Sabas
+Placido, traitor to your country. With your face to a wall. So, you
+will die. I am the admiral, and I will take you to them. With your face
+to a wall. Yes.”
+
+Don Sabas half turned and waved his hand, with a ringing laugh, toward
+his fellow fugitives. “To you, _caballeros_, I have related the history
+of that session when we issued that O! so ridiculous commission. Of a
+truth our jest has been turned against us. Behold the Frankenstein’s
+monster we have created!”
+
+Don Sabas glanced toward the shore. The lights of Coralio were drawing
+near. He could see the beach, the warehouse of the _Bodega Nacional_,
+the long, low _cuartel_ occupied by the soldiers, and, behind that,
+gleaming in the moonlight, a stretch of high adobe wall. He had seen
+men stood with their faces to that wall and shot dead.
+
+Again he addressed the extravagant figure at the helm.
+
+“It is true,” he said, “that I am fleeing the country. But, receive the
+assurance that I care very little for that. Courts and camps everywhere
+are open to Sabas Placido. _Vaya!_ what is this molehill of a
+republic—this pig’s head of a country—to a man like me? I am a
+_paisano_ of everywhere. In Rome, in London, in Paris, in Vienna, you
+will hear them say: ‘Welcome back, Don Sabas.’ Come!—_tonto_—baboon of
+a boy—admiral, whatever you call yourself, turn your boat. Put us on
+board the _Salvador_, and here is your pay—five hundred _pesos_ in
+money of the _Estados Unidos_—more than your lying government will pay
+you in twenty years.”
+
+Don Sabas pressed a plump purse against the youth’s hand. The admiral
+gave no heed to the words or the movement. Braced against the helm, he
+was holding the sloop dead on her shoreward course. His dull face was
+lit almost to intelligence by some inward conceit that seemed to afford
+him joy, and found utterance in another parrot-like cackle.
+
+“That is why they do it,” he said—“so that you will not see the guns.
+They fire—oom!—and you fall dead. With your face to the wall. Yes.”
+
+The admiral called a sudden order to his crew. The lithe, silent Caribs
+made fast the sheets they held, and slipped down the hatchway into the
+hold of the sloop. When the last one had disappeared, Don Sabas, like a
+big, brown leopard, leaped forward, closed and fastened the hatch and
+stood, smiling.
+
+“No rifles, if you please, dear admiral,” he said. “It was a whimsey of
+mine once to compile a dictionary of the Carib _lengua_. So, I
+understood your order. Perhaps now you will—”
+
+He cut short his words, for he heard the dull “swish” of iron scraping
+along tin. The admiral had drawn the cutlass of Pedro Lafitte, and was
+darting upon him. The blade descended, and it was only by a display of
+surprising agility that the large man escaped, with only a bruised
+shoulder, the glancing weapon. He was drawing his pistol as he sprang,
+and the next instant he shot the admiral down.
+
+Don Sabas stooped over him, and rose again.
+
+“In the heart,” he said briefly. “_Señores_, the navy is abolished.”
+
+Colonel Rafael sprang to the helm, and the other officer hastened to
+loose the mainsail sheets. The boom swung round; _El Nacional_ veered
+and began to tack industriously for the _Salvador_.
+
+“Strike that flag, señor,” called Colonel Rafael. “Our friends on the
+steamer will wonder why we are sailing under it.”
+
+“Well said,” cried Don Sabas. Advancing to the mast he lowered the flag
+to the deck, where lay its too loyal supporter. Thus ended the Minister
+of War’s little piece of after-dinner drollery, and by the same hand
+that began it.
+
+Suddenly Don Sabas gave a great cry of joy, and ran down the slanting
+deck to the side of Colonel Rafael. Across his arm he carried the flag
+of the extinguished navy.
+
+“_Mire! mire! señor._ Ah, _Dios!_ Already can I hear that great bear of
+an _Oestreicher_ shout, _‘Du hast mein herz gebrochen!’ Mire!_ Of my
+friend, Herr Grunitz, of Vienna, you have heard me relate. That man has
+travelled to Ceylon for an orchid—to Patagonia for a headdress—to
+Benares for a slipper—to Mozambique for a spearhead to add to his
+famous collections. Thou knowest, also, _amigo_ Rafael, that I have
+been a gatherer of curios. My collection of battle flags of the world’s
+navies was the most complete in existence until last year. Then Herr
+Grunitz secured two, O! such rare specimens. One of a Barbary state,
+and one of the Makarooroos, a tribe on the west coast of Africa. I have
+not those, but they can be procured. But this flag, señor—do you know
+what it is? Name of God! do you know? See that red cross upon the blue
+and white ground! You never saw it before? _Seguramente no._ It is the
+naval flag of your country. _Mire!_ This rotten tub we stand upon is
+its navy—that dead cockatoo lying there was its commander—that stroke
+of cutlass and single pistol shot a sea battle. All a piece of absurd
+foolery, I grant you—but authentic. There has never been another flag
+like this, and there never will be another. No. It is unique in the
+whole world. Yes. Think of what that means to a collector of flags! Do
+you know, _Coronel mio_, how many golden crowns Herr Grunitz would give
+for this flag? Ten thousand, likely. Well, a hundred thousand would not
+buy it. Beautiful flag! Only flag! Little devil of a most heaven-born
+flag! _O-hé!_ old grumbler beyond the ocean. Wait till Don Sabas comes
+again to the Königin Strasse. He will let you kneel and touch the folds
+of it with one finger. _O-hé!_ old spectacled ransacker of the world!”
+
+Forgotten was the impotent revolution, the danger, the loss, the gall
+of defeat. Possessed solely by the inordinate and unparalleled passion
+of the collector, he strode up and down the little deck, clasping to
+his breast with one hand the paragon of a flag. He snapped his fingers
+triumphantly toward the east. He shouted the paean to his prize in
+trumpet tones, as though he would make old Grunitz hear in his musty
+den beyond the sea.
+
+They were waiting, on the _Salvador_, to welcome them. The sloop came
+close alongside the steamer where her sides were sliced almost to the
+lower deck for the loading of fruit. The sailors of the _Salvador_
+grappled and held her there.
+
+Captain McLeod leaned over the side.
+
+“Well, señor, the jig is up, I’m told.”
+
+“The jig is up?” Don Sabas looked perplexed for a moment. “That
+revolution—ah, yes!” With a shrug of his shoulders he dismissed the
+matter.
+
+The captain learned of the escape and the imprisoned crew.
+
+“Caribs?” he said; “no harm in them.” He slipped down into the sloop
+and kicked loose the hasp of the hatch. The black fellows came tumbling
+up, sweating but grinning.
+
+“Hey! black boys!” said the captain, in a dialect of his own; “you
+sabe, catchy boat and vamos back same place quick.”
+
+They saw him point to themselves, the sloop and Coralio. “Yas, yas!”
+they cried, with broader grins and many nods.
+
+The four—Don Sabas, the two officers and the captain—moved to quit the
+sloop. Don Sabas lagged a little behind, looking at the still form of
+the late admiral, sprawled in his paltry trappings.
+
+“_Pobrecito loco_,” he said softly.
+
+He was a brilliant cosmopolite and a _cognoscente_ of high rank; but,
+after all, he was of the same race and blood and instinct as this
+people. Even as the simple _paisanos_ of Coralio had said it, so said
+Don Sabas. Without a smile, he looked, and said, “The poor little
+crazed one!”
+
+Stooping he raised the limp shoulders, drew the priceless and
+induplicable flag under them and over the breast, pinning it there with
+the diamond star of the Order of San Carlos that he took from the
+collar of his own coat.
+
+He followed after the others, and stood with them upon the deck of the
+_Salvador_. The sailors that steadied _El Nacional_ shoved her off. The
+jabbering Caribs hauled away at the rigging; the sloop headed for the
+shore.
+
+And Herr Grunitz’s collection of naval flags was still the finest in
+the world.
+
+
+
+
+X
+THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM
+
+
+One night when there was no breeze, and Coralio seemed closer than ever
+to the gratings of Avernus, five men were grouped about the door of the
+photograph establishment of Keogh and Clancy. Thus, in all the scorched
+and exotic places of the earth, Caucasians meet when the day’s work is
+done to preserve the fulness of their heritage by the aspersion of
+alien things.
+
+Johnny Atwood lay stretched upon the grass in the undress uniform of a
+Carib, and prated feebly of cool water to be had in the cucumber-wood
+pumps of Dalesburg. Dr. Gregg, through the prestige of his whiskers and
+as a bribe against the relation of his imminent professional tales, was
+conceded the hammock that was swung between the door jamb and a
+calabash-tree. Keogh had moved out upon the grass a little table that
+held the instrument for burnishing completed photographs. He was the
+only busy one of the group. Industriously from between the cylinders of
+the burnisher rolled the finished depictments of Coralio’s citizens.
+Blanchard, the French mining engineer, in his cool linen viewed the
+smoke of his cigarette through his calm glasses, impervious to the
+heat. Clancy sat on the steps, smoking his short pipe. His mood was the
+gossip’s; the others were reduced, by the humidity, to the state of
+disability desirable in an audience.
+
+Clancy was an American with an Irish diathesis and cosmopolitan
+proclivities. Many businesses had claimed him, but not for long. The
+roadster’s blood was in his veins. The voice of the tintype was but one
+of the many callings that had wooed him upon so many roads. Sometimes
+he could be persuaded to oral construction of his voyages into the
+informal and egregious. To-night there were symptoms of divulgement in
+him.
+
+“’Tis elegant weather for filibusterin’,” he volunteered. “It reminds
+me of the time I struggled to liberate a nation from the poisonous
+breath of a tyrant’s clutch. ’Twas hard work. ’Tis strainin’ to the
+back and makes corns on the hands.”
+
+“I didn’t know you had ever lent your sword to an oppressed people,”
+murmured Atwood, from the grass.
+
+“I did,” said Clancy; “and they turned it into a ploughshare.”
+
+“What country was so fortunate as to secure your aid?” airily inquired
+Blanchard.
+
+“Where’s Kamchatka?” asked Clancy, with seeming irrelevance.
+
+“Why, off Siberia somewhere in the Arctic regions,” somebody answered,
+doubtfully.
+
+“I thought that was the cold one,” said Clancy, with a satisfied nod.
+“I’m always gettin’ the two names mixed. ’Twas Guatemala, then—the hot
+one—I’ve been filibusterin’ with. Ye’ll find that country on the map.
+’Tis in the district known as the tropics. By the foresight of
+Providence, it lies on the coast so the geography man could run the
+names of the towns off into the water. They’re an inch long, small
+type, composed of Spanish dialects, and, ’tis my opinion, of the same
+system of syntax that blew up the _Maine_. Yes, ’twas that country I
+sailed against, single-handed, and endeavoured to liberate it from a
+tyrannical government with a single-barreled pickaxe, unloaded at that.
+Ye don’t understand, of course. ’Tis a statement demandin’ elucidation
+and apologies.
+
+“’Twas in New Orleans one morning about the first of June; I was
+standin’ down on the wharf, lookin’ about at the ships in the river.
+There was a little steamer moored right opposite me that seemed about
+ready to sail. The funnels of it were throwin’ out smoke, and a gang of
+roustabouts were carryin’ aboard a pile of boxes that was stacked up on
+the wharf. The boxes were about two feet square, and somethin’ like
+four feet long, and they seemed to be pretty heavy.
+
+“I walked over, careless, to the stack of boxes. I saw one of them had
+been broken in handlin’. ’Twas curiosity made me pull up the loose top
+and look inside. The box was packed full of Winchester rifles. ‘So,
+so,’ says I to myself; ‘somebody’s gettin’ a twist on the neutrality
+laws. Somebody’s aidin’ with munitions of war. I wonder where the
+popguns are goin’?’
+
+“I heard somebody cough, and I turned around. There stood a little,
+round, fat man with a brown face and white clothes, a
+first-class-looking little man, with a four-karat diamond on his finger
+and his eye full of interrogations and respects. I judged he was a kind
+of foreigner—may be from Russia or Japan or the archipelagoes.
+
+“‘Hist!’ says the round man, full of concealments and confidences.
+‘Will the señor respect the discoveryments he has made, that the mans
+on the ship shall not be acquaint? The señor will be a gentleman that
+shall not expose one thing that by accident occur.’
+
+“‘Monseer,’ says I—for I judged him to be a kind of Frenchman—‘receive
+my most exasperated assurances that your secret is safe with James
+Clancy. Furthermore, I will go so far as to remark, Veev la
+Liberty—veev it good and strong. Whenever you hear of a Clancy
+obstructin’ the abolishment of existin’ governments you may notify me
+by return mail.’
+
+“‘The señor is good,’ says the dark, fat man, smilin’ under his black
+mustache. ‘Wish you to come aboard my ship and drink of wine a glass.’
+
+“Bein’ a Clancy, in two minutes me and the foreigner man were seated at
+a table in the cabin of the steamer, with a bottle between us. I could
+hear the heavy boxes bein’ dumped into the hold. I judged that cargo
+must consist of at least 2,000 Winchesters. Me and the brown man drank
+the bottle of stuff, and he called the steward to bring another. When
+you amalgamate a Clancy with the contents of a bottle you practically
+instigate secession. I had heard a good deal about these revolutions in
+them tropical localities, and I begun to want a hand in it.
+
+“‘You goin’ to stir things up in your country, ain’t you, monseer?’
+says I, with a wink to let him know I was on.
+
+“‘Yes, yes,’ said the little man, pounding his fist on the table. ‘A
+change of the greatest will occur. Too long have the people been
+oppressed with the promises and the never-to-happen things to become.
+The great work it shall be carry on. Yes. Our forces shall in the
+capital city strike of the soonest. _Carrambos!_’
+
+“‘_Carrambos_ is the word,’ says I, beginning to invest myself with
+enthusiasm and more wine, ‘likewise veeva, as I said before. May the
+shamrock of old—I mean the banana-vine or the pie-plant, or whatever
+the imperial emblem may be of your down-trodden country, wave forever.’
+
+“‘A thousand thank-yous,’ says the round man, ‘for your emission of
+amicable utterances. What our cause needs of the very most is mans who
+will the work do, to lift it along. Oh, for one thousands strong, good
+mans to aid the General De Vega that he shall to his country bring
+those success and glory! It is hard—oh, so hard to find good mans to
+help in the work.’
+
+“‘Monseer,’ says I, leanin’ over the table and graspin’ his hand, ‘I
+don’t know where your country is, but me heart bleeds for it. The heart
+of a Clancy was never deaf to the sight of an oppressed people. The
+family is filibusterers by birth, and foreigners by trade. If you can
+use James Clancy’s arms and his blood in denudin’ your shores of the
+tyrant’s yoke they’re yours to command.’
+
+“General De Vega was overcome with joy to confiscate my condolence of
+his conspiracies and predicaments. He tried to embrace me across the
+table, but his fatness, and the wine that had been in the bottles,
+prevented. Thus was I welcomed into the ranks of filibustery. Then the
+general man told me his country had the name of Guatemala, and was the
+greatest nation laved by any ocean whatever anywhere. He looked at me
+with tears in his eyes, and from time to time he would emit the remark,
+‘Ah! big, strong, brave mans! That is what my country need.’
+
+“General De Vega, as was the name by which he denounced himself,
+brought out a document for me to sign, which I did, makin’ a fine
+flourish and curlycue with the tail of the ‘y.’
+
+“‘Your passage-money,’ says the general, business-like, ‘shall from
+your pay be deduct.’
+
+“’Twill not,’ says I, haughty. ‘I’ll pay my own passage.’ A hundred and
+eighty dollars I had in my inside pocket, and ’twas no common
+filibuster I was goin’ to be, filibusterin’ for me board and clothes.
+
+“The steamer was to sail in two hours, and I went ashore to get some
+things together I’d need. When I came aboard I showed the general with
+pride the outfit. ’Twas a fine Chinchilla overcoat, Arctic overshoes,
+fur cap and earmuffs, with elegant fleece-lined gloves and woolen
+muffler.
+
+“‘_Carrambos!_’ says the little general. ‘What clothes are these that
+shall go to the tropic?’ And then the little spalpeen laughs, and he
+calls the captain, and the captain calls the purser, and they pipe up
+the chief engineer, and the whole gang leans against the cabin and
+laughs at Clancy’s wardrobe for Guatemala.
+
+“I reflects a bit, serious, and asks the general again to denominate
+the terms by which his country is called. He tells me, and I see then
+that ’twas the t’other one, Kamchatka, I had in mind. Since then I’ve
+had difficulty in separatin’ the two nations in name, climate and
+geographic disposition.
+
+“I paid my passage—twenty-four dollars, first cabin—and ate at table
+with the officer crowd. Down on the lower deck was a gang of
+second-class passengers, about forty of them, seemin’ to be Dagoes and
+the like. I wondered what so many of them were goin’ along for.
+
+“Well, then, in three days we sailed alongside that Guatemala. ’Twas a
+blue country, and not yellow as ’tis miscolored on the map. We landed
+at a town on the coast, where a train of cars was waitin’ for us on a
+dinky little railroad. The boxes on the steamer were brought ashore and
+loaded on the cars. The gang of Dagoes got aboard, too, the general and
+me in the front car. Yes, me and General De Vega headed the revolution,
+as it pulled out of the seaport town. That train travelled about as
+fast as a policeman goin’ to a riot. It penetrated the most conspicuous
+lot of fuzzy scenery ever seen outside a geography. We run some forty
+miles in seven hours, and the train stopped. There was no more
+railroad. ’Twas a sort of camp in a damp gorge full of wildness and
+melancholies. They was gradin’ and choppin’ out the forests ahead to
+continue the road. ‘Here,’ says I to myself, ‘is the romantic haunt of
+the revolutionists. Here will Clancy, by the virtue that is in a
+superior race and the inculcation of Fenian tactics, strike a
+tremendous blow for liberty.’
+
+“They unloaded the boxes from the train and begun to knock the tops
+off. From the first one that was open I saw General De Vega take the
+Winchester rifles and pass them around to a squad of morbid soldiery.
+The other boxes was opened next, and, believe me or not, divil another
+gun was to be seen. Every other box in the load was full of pickaxes
+and spades.
+
+“And then—sorrow be upon them tropics—the proud Clancy and the
+dishonoured Dagoes, each one of them, had to shoulder a pick or a
+spade, and march away to work on that dirty little railroad. Yes; ’twas
+that the Dagoes shipped for, and ’twas that the filibusterin’ Clancy
+signed for, though unbeknownst to himself at the time. In after days I
+found out about it. It seems ’twas hard to get hands to work on that
+road. The intelligent natives of the country was too lazy to work.
+Indeed, the saints know, ’twas unnecessary. By stretchin’ out one hand,
+they could seize the most delicate and costly fruits of the earth, and,
+by stretchin’ out the other, they could sleep for days at a time
+without hearin’ a seven-o’clock whistle or the footsteps of the rent
+man upon the stairs. So, regular, the steamers travelled to the United
+States to seduce labour. Usually the imported spade-slingers died in
+two or three months from eatin’ the over-ripe water and breathin’ the
+violent tropical scenery. Wherefore they made them sign contracts for a
+year, when they hired them, and put an armed guard over the poor divils
+to keep them from runnin’ away.
+
+“’Twas thus I was double-crossed by the tropics through a family
+failin’ of goin’ out of the way to hunt disturbances.
+
+“They gave me a pick, and I took it, meditatin’ an insurrection on the
+spot; but there was the guards handlin’ the Winchesters careless, and I
+come to the conclusion that discretion was the best part of
+filibusterin’. There was about a hundred of us in the gang startin’ out
+to work, and the word was given to move. I steps out of the ranks and
+goes up to that General De Vega man, who was smokin’ a cigar and gazin’
+upon the scene with satisfactions and glory. He smiles at me polite and
+devilish. ‘Plenty work,’ says he, ‘for big, strong mans in Guatemala.
+Yes. T’irty dollars in the month. Good pay. Ah, yes. You strong, brave
+man. Bimeby we push those railroad in the capital very quick. They want
+you go work now. _Adios_, strong mans.’
+
+“‘Monseer,’ says I, lingerin’, ‘will you tell a poor little Irishman
+this: When I set foot on your cockroachy steamer, and breathed liberal
+and revolutionary sentiments into your sour wine, did you think I was
+conspirin’ to sling a pick on your contemptuous little railroad? And
+when you answered me with patriotic recitations, humping up the
+star-spangled cause of liberty, did you have meditations of reducin’ me
+to the ranks of the stump-grubbin’ Dagoes in the chain-gangs of your
+vile and grovelin’ country?’
+
+“The general man expanded his rotundity and laughed considerable. Yes,
+he laughed very long and loud, and I, Clancy, stood and waited.
+
+“‘Comical mans!’ he shouts, at last. ‘So you will kill me from the
+laughing. Yes; it is hard to find the brave, strong mans to aid my
+country. Revolutions? Did I speak of r-r-revolutions? Not one word. I
+say, big, strong mans is need in Guatemala. So. The mistake is of you.
+You have looked in those one box containing those gun for the guard.
+You think all boxes is contain gun? No.
+
+“‘There is not war in Guatemala. But work? Yes. Good. T’irty dollar in
+the month. You shall shoulder one pickaxe, señor, and dig for the
+liberty and prosperity of Guatemala. Off to your work. The guard waits
+for you.’
+
+“‘Little, fat, poodle dog of a brown man,’ says I, quiet, but full of
+indignations and discomforts, ‘things shall happen to you. Maybe not
+right away, but as soon as J. Clancy can formulate somethin’ in the way
+of repartee.’
+
+“The boss of the gang orders us to work. I tramps off with the Dagoes,
+and I hears the distinguished patriot and kidnapper laughin’ hearty as
+we go.
+
+“’Tis a sorrowful fact, for eight weeks I built railroads for that
+misbehavin’ country. I filibustered twelve hours a day with a heavy
+pick and a spade, choppin’ away the luxurious landscape that grew upon
+the right of way. We worked in swamps that smelled like there was a
+leak in the gas mains, trampin’ down a fine assortment of the most
+expensive hothouse plants and vegetables. The scene was tropical beyond
+the wildest imagination of the geography man. The trees was all
+sky-scrapers; the underbrush was full of needles and pins; there was
+monkeys jumpin’ around and crocodiles and pink-tailed mockin’-birds,
+and ye stood knee-deep in the rotten water and grabbled roots for the
+liberation of Guatemala. Of nights we would build smudges in camp to
+discourage the mosquitoes, and sit in the smoke, with the guards pacin’
+all around us. There was two hundred men workin’ on the road—mostly
+Dagoes, nigger-men, Spanish-men and Swedes. Three or four were Irish.
+
+“One old man named Halloran—a man of Hibernian entitlements and
+discretions, explained it to me. He had been workin’ on the road a
+year. Most of them died in less than six months. He was dried up to
+gristle and bone, and shook with chills every third night.
+
+“‘When you first come,’ says he, ‘ye think ye’ll leave right away. But
+they hold out your first month’s pay for your passage over, and by that
+time the tropics has its grip on ye. Ye’re surrounded by a ragin’
+forest full of disreputable beasts—lions and baboons and
+anacondas—waitin’ to devour ye. The sun strikes ye hard, and melts the
+marrow in your bones. Ye get similar to the lettuce-eaters the
+poetry-book speaks about. Ye forget the elevated sintiments of life,
+such as patriotism, revenge, disturbances of the peace and the dacint
+love of a clane shirt. Ye do your work, and ye swallow the kerosene ile
+and rubber pipestems dished up to ye by the Dago cook for food. Ye
+light your pipeful, and say to yoursilf, “Nixt week I’ll break away,”
+and ye go to sleep and call yersilf a liar, for ye know ye’ll never do
+it.’
+
+“‘Who is this general man,’ asks I, ‘that calls himself De Vega?’
+
+“‘’Tis the man,’ says Halloran, ‘who is tryin’ to complete the
+finishin’ of the railroad. ’Twas the project of a private corporation,
+but it busted, and then the government took it up. De Vegy is a big
+politician, and wants to be prisident. The people want the railroad
+completed, as they’re taxed mighty on account of it. The De Vegy man is
+pushin’ it along as a campaign move.’
+
+“‘’Tis not my way,’ says I, ‘to make threats against any man, but
+there’s an account to be settled between the railroad man and James
+O’Dowd Clancy.’
+
+“‘’Twas that way I thought, mesilf, at first,’ Halloran says, with a
+big sigh, ‘until I got to be a lettuce-eater. The fault’s wid these
+tropics. They rejuices a man’s system. ’Tis a land, as the poet says,
+“Where it always seems to be after dinner.” I does me work and smokes
+me pipe and sleeps. There’s little else in life, anyway. Ye’ll get that
+way yersilf, mighty soon. Don’t be harbourin’ any sintiments at all,
+Clancy.’
+
+“‘I can’t help it,’ says I; ‘I’m full of ’em. I enlisted in the
+revolutionary army of this dark country in good faith to fight for its
+liberty, honours and silver candlesticks; instead of which I am set to
+amputatin’ its scenery and grubbin’ its roots. ’Tis the general man
+will have to pay for it.’
+
+“Two months I worked on that railroad before I found a chance to get
+away. One day a gang of us was sent back to the end of the completed
+line to fetch some picks that had been sent down to Port Barrios to be
+sharpened. They were brought on a hand-car, and I noticed, when I
+started away, that the car was left there on the track.
+
+“That night, about twelve, I woke up Halloran and told him my scheme.
+
+“‘Run away?’ says Halloran. ‘Good Lord, Clancy, do ye mean it? Why, I
+ain’t got the nerve. It’s too chilly, and I ain’t slept enough. Run
+away? I told you, Clancy, I’ve eat the lettuce. I’ve lost my grip. ’Tis
+the tropics that’s done it. ’Tis like the poet says: “Forgotten are our
+friends that we have left behind; in the hollow lettuce-land we will
+live and lay reclined.” You better go on, Clancy. I’ll stay, I guess.
+It’s too early and cold, and I’m sleepy.’
+
+“So I had to leave Halloran. I dressed quiet, and slipped out of the
+tent we were in. When the guard came along I knocked him over, like a
+ninepin, with a green cocoanut I had, and made for the railroad. I got
+on that hand-car and made it fly. ’Twas yet a while before daybreak
+when I saw the lights of Port Barrios about a mile away. I stopped the
+hand-car there and walked to the town. I stepped inside the
+corporations of that town with care and hesitations. I was not afraid
+of the army of Guatemala, but me soul quaked at the prospect of a
+hand-to-hand struggle with its employment bureau. ’Tis a country that
+hires its help easy and keeps ’em long. Sure I can fancy Missis America
+and Missis Guatemala passin’ a bit of gossip some fine, still night
+across the mountains. ‘Oh, dear,’ says Missis America, ‘and it’s a lot
+of trouble I’m havin’ ag’in with the help, señora, ma’am.’ ‘Laws, now!’
+says Missis Guatemala, ‘you don’t say so, ma’am! Now, mine never think
+of leavin’ me—te-he! ma’am,’ snickers Missis Guatemala.
+
+“I was wonderin’ how I was goin’ to move away from them tropics without
+bein’ hired again. Dark as it was, I could see a steamer ridin’ in the
+harbour, with smoke emergin’ from her stacks. I turned down a little
+grass street that run down to the water. On the beach I found a little
+brown nigger-man just about to shove off in a skiff.
+
+“‘Hold on, Sambo,’ says I, ‘savve English?’
+
+“‘Heap plenty, yes,’ says he, with a pleasant grin.
+
+“‘What steamer is that?’ I asks him, ‘and where is it going? And what’s
+the news, and the good word and the time of day?’
+
+“‘That steamer the _Conchita_,’ said the brown man, affable and easy,
+rollin’ a cigarette. ‘Him come from New Orleans for load banana. Him
+got load last night. I think him sail in one, two hour. Verree nice day
+we shall be goin’ have. You hear some talkee ’bout big battle, maybe
+so? You think catchee General De Vega, señor? Yes? No?’
+
+“‘How’s that, Sambo?’ says I. ‘Big battle? What battle? Who wants
+catchee General De Vega? I’ve been up at my old gold mines in the
+interior for a couple of months, and haven’t heard any news.’
+
+“‘Oh,’ says the nigger-man, proud to speak the English, ‘verree great
+revolution in Guatemala one week ago. General De Vega, him try be
+president. Him raise armee—one—five—ten thousand mans for fight at the
+government. Those one government send five—forty—hundred thousand
+soldier to suppress revolution. They fight big battle yesterday at
+Lomagrande—that about nineteen or fifty mile in the mountain. That
+government soldier wheep General De Vega—oh, most bad. Five
+hundred—nine hundred—two thousand of his mans is kill. That revolution
+is smash suppress—bust—very quick. General De Vega, him r-r-run away
+fast on one big mule. Yes, _carrambos!_ The general, him r-r-run away,
+and his armee is kill. That government soldier, they try find General
+De Vega verree much. They want catchee him for shoot. You think they
+catchee that general, señor?’
+
+“‘Saints grant it!’ says I. ‘’Twould be the judgment of Providence for
+settin’ the warlike talent of a Clancy to gradin’ the tropics with a
+pick and shovel. But ’tis not so much a question of insurrections now,
+me little man, as ’tis of the hired-man problem. ’Tis anxious I am to
+resign a situation of responsibility and trust with the white wings
+department of your great and degraded country. Row me in your little
+boat out to that steamer, and I’ll give ye five dollars—sinker
+pacers—sinker pacers,’ says I, reducin’ the offer to the language and
+denomination of the tropic dialects.
+
+“‘_Cinco pesos_,’ repeats the little man. ‘Five dollee, you give?’
+
+“’Twas not such a bad little man. He had hesitations at first, sayin’
+that passengers leavin’ the country had to have papers and passports,
+but at last he took me out alongside the steamer.
+
+“Day was just breakin’ as we struck her, and there wasn’t a soul to be
+seen on board. The water was very still, and the nigger-man gave me a
+lift from the boat, and I climbed onto the steamer where her side was
+sliced to the deck for loadin’ fruit. The hatches was open, and I
+looked down and saw the cargo of bananas that filled the hold to within
+six feet of the top. I thinks to myself, ‘Clancy, you better go as a
+stowaway. It’s safer. The steamer men might hand you back to the
+employment bureau. The tropic’ll get you, Clancy, if you don’t watch
+out.’
+
+“So I jumps down easy among the bananas, and digs out a hole to hide in
+among the bunches. In an hour or so I could hear the engines goin’, and
+feel the steamer rockin’, and I knew we were off to sea. They left the
+hatches open for ventilation, and pretty soon it was light enough in
+the hold to see fairly well. I got to feelin’ a bit hungry, and thought
+I’d have a light fruit lunch, by way of refreshment. I creeped out of
+the hole I’d made and stood up straight. Just then I saw another man
+crawl up about ten feet away and reach out and skin a banana and stuff
+it into his mouth. ’Twas a dirty man, black-faced and ragged and
+disgraceful of aspect. Yes, the man was a ringer for the pictures of
+the fat Weary Willie in the funny papers. I looked again, and saw it
+was my general man—De Vega, the great revolutionist, mule-rider and
+pickaxe importer. When he saw me the general hesitated with his mouth
+filled with banana and his eyes the size of cocoanuts.
+
+“‘Hist!’ I says. ‘Not a word, or they’ll put us off and make us walk.
+“Veev la Liberty!”’ I adds, copperin’ the sentiment by shovin’ a banana
+into the source of it. I was certain the general wouldn’t recognize me.
+The nefarious work of the tropics had left me lookin’ different. There
+was half an inch of roan whiskers coverin’ me face, and me costume was
+a pair of blue overalls and a red shirt.
+
+“‘How you come in the ship, señor?’ asked the general as soon as he
+could speak.
+
+“‘By the back door—whist!’ says I. ‘’Twas a glorious blow for liberty
+we struck,’ I continues; ‘but we was overpowered by numbers. Let us
+accept our defeat like brave men and eat another banana.’
+
+“‘Were you in the cause of liberty fightin’, señor?’ says the general,
+sheddin’ tears on the cargo.
+
+“‘To the last,’ says I. ‘’Twas I led the last desperate charge against
+the minions of the tyrant. But it made them mad, and we was forced to
+retreat. ’Twas I, general, procured the mule upon which you escaped.
+Could you give that ripe bunch a little boost this way, general? It’s a
+bit out of my reach. Thanks.’
+
+“‘Say you so, brave patriot?’ said the general, again weepin’. ‘Ah,
+_Dios!_ And I have not the means to reward your devotion. Barely did I
+my life bring away. _Carrambos!_ what a devil’s animal was that mule,
+señor! Like ships in one storm was I dashed about. The skin on myself
+was ripped away with the thorns and vines. Upon the bark of a hundred
+trees did that beast of the infernal bump, and cause outrage to the
+legs of mine. In the night to Port Barrios I came. I dispossess myself
+of that mountain of mule and hasten along the water shore. I find a
+little boat to be tied. I launch myself and row to the steamer. I
+cannot see any mans on board, so I climbed one rope which hang at the
+side. I then myself hide in the bananas. Surely, I say, if the ship
+captains view me, they shall throw me again to those Guatemala. Those
+things are not good. Guatemala will shoot General De Vega. Therefore, I
+am hide and remain silent. Life itself is glorious. Liberty, it is
+pretty good; but so good as life I do not think.’
+
+“Three days, as I said, was the trip to New Orleans. The general man
+and me got to be cronies of the deepest dye. Bananas we ate until they
+were distasteful to the sight and an eyesore to the palate, but to
+bananas alone was the bill of fare reduced. At night I crawls out,
+careful, on the lower deck, and gets a bucket of fresh water.
+
+“That General De Vega was a man inhabited by an engorgement of words
+and sentences. He added to the monotony of the voyage by divestin’
+himself of conversation. He believed I was a revolutionist of his own
+party, there bein’, as he told me, a good many Americans and other
+foreigners in its ranks. ’Twas a braggart and a conceited little
+gabbler it was, though he considered himself a hero. ’Twas on himself
+he wasted all his regrets at the failin’ of his plot. Not a word did
+the little balloon have to say about the other misbehavin’ idiots that
+had been shot, or run themselves to death in his revolution.
+
+“The second day out he was feelin’ pretty braggy and uppish for a
+stowed-away conspirator that owed his existence to a mule and stolen
+bananas. He was tellin’ me about the great railroad he had been
+buildin’, and he relates what he calls a comic incident about a fool
+Irishman he inveigled from New Orleans to sling a pick on his little
+morgue of a narrow-gauge line. ’Twas sorrowful to hear the little,
+dirty general tell the opprobrious story of how he put salt upon the
+tail of that reckless and silly bird, Clancy. Laugh, he did, hearty and
+long. He shook with laughin’, the black-faced rebel and outcast,
+standin’ neck-deep in bananas, without friends or country.
+
+“‘Ah, señor,’ he snickers, ‘to the death you would have laughed at that
+drollest Irish. I say to him: “Strong, big mans is need very much in
+Guatemala.” “I will blows strike for your down-pressed country,” he
+say. “That shall you do,” I tell him. Ah! it was an Irish so comic. He
+sees one box break upon the wharf that contain for the guard a few gun.
+He think there is gun in all the box. But that is all pickaxe. Yes. Ah!
+señor, could you the face of that Irish have seen when they set him to
+the work!’
+
+“’Twas thus the ex-boss of the employment bureau contributed to the
+tedium of the trip with merry jests and anecdote. But now and then he
+would weep upon the bananas and make oration about the lost cause of
+liberty and the mule.
+
+“’Twas a pleasant sound when the steamer bumped against the pier in New
+Orleans. Pretty soon we heard the pat-a-pat of hundreds of bare feet,
+and the Dago gang that unloads the fruit jumped on the deck and down
+into the hold. Me and the general worked a while at passin’ up the
+bunches, and they thought we were part of the gang. After about an hour
+we managed to slip off the steamer onto the wharf.
+
+“’Twas a great honour on the hands of an obscure Clancy, havin’ the
+entertainment of the representative of a great foreign filibusterin’
+power. I first bought for the general and myself many long drinks and
+things to eat that were not bananas. The general man trotted along at
+my side, leavin’ all the arrangements to me. I led him up to Lafayette
+Square and set him on a bench in the little park. Cigarettes I had
+bought for him, and he humped himself down on the seat like a little,
+fat, contented hobo. I look him over as he sets there, and what I see
+pleases me. Brown by nature and instinct, he is now brindled with dirt
+and dust. Praise to the mule, his clothes is mostly strings and flaps.
+Yes, the looks of the general man is agreeable to Clancy.
+
+“I ask him, delicate, if, by any chance, he brought away anybody’s
+money with him from Guatemala. He sighs and bumps his shoulders against
+the bench. Not a cent. All right. Maybe, he tells me, some of his
+friends in the tropic outfit will send him funds later. The general was
+as clear a case of no visible means as I ever saw.
+
+“I told him not to move from the bench, and then I went up to the
+corner of Poydras and Carondelet. Along there is O’Hara’s beat. In five
+minutes along comes O’Hara, a big, fine man, red-faced, with shinin’
+buttons, swingin’ his club. ’Twould be a fine thing for Guatemala to
+move into O’Hara’s precinct. ’Twould be a fine bit of recreation for
+Danny to suppress revolutions and uprisin’s once or twice a week with
+his club.
+
+“‘Is 5046 workin’ yet, Danny?’ says I, walkin’ up to him.
+
+“‘Overtime,’ says O’Hara, lookin’ over me suspicious. ‘Want some of
+it?’
+
+“Fifty-forty-six is the celebrated city ordinance authorizin’ arrest,
+conviction and imprisonment of persons that succeed in concealin’ their
+crimes from the police.
+
+“‘Don’t ye know Jimmy Clancy?’ says I. ‘Ye pink-gilled monster.’ So,
+when O’Hara recognized me beneath the scandalous exterior bestowed upon
+me by the tropics, I backed him into a doorway and told him what I
+wanted, and why I wanted it. ‘All right, Jimmy,’ says O’Hara. ‘Go back
+and hold the bench. I’ll be along in ten minutes.’
+
+“In that time O’Hara strolled through Lafayette Square and spied two
+Weary Willies disgracin’ one of the benches. In ten minutes more J.
+Clancy and General De Vega, late candidate for the presidency of
+Guatemala, was in the station house. The general is badly frightened,
+and calls upon me to proclaim his distinguishments and rank.
+
+“‘The man,’ says I to the police, ‘used to be a railroad man. He’s on
+the bum now. ’Tis a little bughouse he is, on account of losin’ his
+job.’
+
+“‘_Carrambos!_’ says the general, fizzin’ like a little soda-water
+fountain, ‘you fought, señor, with my forces in my native country. Why
+do you say the lies? You shall say I am the General De Vega, one
+soldier, one _caballero_—’
+
+“‘Railroader,’ says I again. ‘On the hog. No good. Been livin’ for
+three days on stolen bananas. Look at him. Ain’t that enough?’
+
+“Twenty-five dollars or sixty days, was what the recorder gave the
+general. He didn’t have a cent, so he took the time. They let me go, as
+I knew they would, for I had money to show, and O’Hara spoke for me.
+Yes; sixty days he got. ’Twas just so long that I slung a pick for the
+great country of Kam—Guatemala.”
+
+Clancy paused. The bright starlight showed a reminiscent look of happy
+content on his seasoned features. Keogh leaned in his chair and gave
+his partner a slap on his thinly-clad back that sounded like the crack
+of the surf on the sands.
+
+“Tell ’em, ye divil,” he chuckled, “how you got even with the tropical
+general in the way of agricultural manœuvrings.”
+
+“Havin’ no money,” concluded Clancy, with unction, “they set him to
+work his fine out with a gang from the parish prison clearing Ursulines
+Street. Around the corner was a saloon decorated genially with electric
+fans and cool merchandise. I made that me headquarters, and every
+fifteen minutes I’d walk around and take a look at the little man
+filibusterin’ with a rake and shovel. ’Twas just such a hot broth of a
+day as this has been. And I’d call at him ‘Hey, monseer!’ and he’d look
+at me black, with the damp showin’ through his shirt in places.
+
+“‘Fat, strong mans,’ says I to General De Vega, ‘is needed in New
+Orleans. Yes. To carry on the good work. Carrambos! Erin go bragh!’”
+
+
+
+
+XI
+THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE
+
+
+Breakfast in Coralio was at eleven. Therefore the people did not go to
+market early. The little wooden market-house stood on a patch of
+short-trimmed grass, under the vivid green foliage of a bread-fruit
+tree.
+
+Thither one morning the venders leisurely convened, bringing their
+wares with them. A porch or platform six feet wide encircled the
+building, shaded from the mid-morning sun by the projecting,
+grass-thatched roof. Upon this platform the venders were wont to
+display their goods—newly-killed beef, fish, crabs, fruit of the
+country, cassava, eggs, _dulces_ and high, tottering stacks of native
+tortillas as large around as the sombrero of a Spanish grandee.
+
+But on this morning they whose stations lay on the seaward side of the
+market-house, instead of spreading their merchandise formed themselves
+into a softly jabbering and gesticulating group. For there upon their
+space of the platform was sprawled, asleep, the unbeautiful figure of
+“Beelzebub” Blythe. He lay upon a ragged strip of cocoa matting, more
+than ever a fallen angel in appearance. His suit of coarse flax,
+soiled, bursting at the seams, crumpled into a thousand diversified
+wrinkles and creases, inclosed him absurdly, like the garb of some
+effigy that had been stuffed in sport and thrown there after indignity
+had been wrought upon it. But firmly upon the high bridge of his nose
+reposed his gold-rimmed glasses, the surviving badge of his ancient
+glory.
+
+The sun’s rays, reflecting quiveringly from the rippling sea upon his
+face, and the voices of the market-men woke “Beelzebub” Blythe. He sat
+up, blinking, and leaned his back against the wall of the market.
+Drawing a blighted silk handkerchief from his pocket, he assiduously
+rubbed and burnished his glasses. And while doing this he became aware
+that his bedroom had been invaded, and that polite brown and yellow men
+were beseeching him to vacate in favour of their market stuff.
+
+If the señor would have the goodness—a thousand pardons for bringing to
+him molestation—but soon would come the _compradores_ for the day’s
+provisions—surely they had ten thousand regrets at disturbing him!
+
+In this manner they expanded to him the intimation that he must clear
+out and cease to clog the wheels of trade.
+
+Blythe stepped from the platform with the air of a prince leaving his
+canopied couch. He never quite lost that air, even at the lowest point
+of his fall. It is clear that the college of good breeding does not
+necessarily maintain a chair of morals within its walls.
+
+Blythe shook out his wry clothing, and moved slowly up the Calle Grande
+through the hot sand. He moved without a destination in his mind. The
+little town was languidly stirring to its daily life. Golden-skinned
+babies tumbled over one another in the grass. The sea breeze brought
+him appetite, but nothing to satisfy it. Throughout Coralio were its
+morning odors—those from the heavily fragrant tropical flowers and from
+the bread baking in the outdoor ovens of clay and the pervading smoke
+of their fires. Where the smoke cleared, the crystal air, with some of
+the efficacy of faith, seemed to remove the mountains almost to the
+sea, bringing them so near that one might count the scarred glades on
+their wooded sides. The light-footed Caribs were swiftly gliding to
+their tasks at the waterside. Already along the bosky trails from the
+banana groves files of horses were slowly moving, concealed, except for
+their nodding heads and plodding legs, by the bunches of green-golden
+fruit heaped upon their backs. On doorsills sat women combing their
+long, black hair and calling, one to another, across the narrow
+thoroughfares. Peace reigned in Coralio—arid and bald peace; but still
+peace.
+
+On that bright morning when Nature seemed to be offering the lotus on
+the Dawn’s golden platter “Beelzebub” Blythe had reached rock bottom.
+Further descent seemed impossible. That last night’s slumber in a
+public place had done for him. As long as he had had a roof to cover
+him there had remained, unbridged, the space that separates a gentleman
+from the beasts of the jungle and the fowls of the air. But now he was
+little more than a whimpering oyster led to be devoured on the sands of
+a Southern sea by the artful walrus, Circumstance, and the implacable
+carpenter, Fate.
+
+To Blythe money was now but a memory. He had drained his friends of all
+that their good-fellowship had to offer; then he had squeezed them to
+the last drop of their generosity; and at the last, Aaron-like, he had
+smitten the rock of their hardening bosoms for the scattering, ignoble
+drops of Charity itself.
+
+He had exhausted his credit to the last _real_. With the minute
+keenness of the shameless sponger he was aware of every source in
+Coralio from which a glass of rum, a meal or a piece of silver could be
+wheedled. Marshalling each such source in his mind, he considered it
+with all the thoroughness and penetration that hunger and thirst lent
+him for the task. All his optimism failed to thresh a grain of hope
+from the chaff of his postulations. He had played out the game. That
+one night in the open had shaken his nerves. Until then there had been
+left to him at least a few grounds upon which he could base his
+unblushing demands upon his neighbours’ stores. Now he must beg instead
+of borrowing. The most brazen sophistry could not dignify by the name
+of “loan” the coin contemptuously flung to a beachcomber who slept on
+the bare boards of the public market.
+
+But on this morning no beggar would have more thankfully received a
+charitable coin, for the demon thirst had him by the throat—the
+drunkard’s matutinal thirst that requires to be slaked at each morning
+station on the road to Tophet.
+
+Blythe walked slowly up the street, keeping a watchful eye for any
+miracle that might drop manna upon him in his wilderness. As he passed
+the popular eating house of Madama Vasquez, Madama’s boarders were just
+sitting down to freshly-baked bread, _aguacates_, pines and delicious
+coffee that sent forth odorous guarantee of its quality upon the
+breeze. Madama was serving; she turned her shy, stolid, melancholy gaze
+for a moment out the window; she saw Blythe, and her expression turned
+more shy and embarrassed. “Beelzebub” owed her twenty _pesos_. He bowed
+as he had once bowed to less embarrassed dames to whom he owed nothing,
+and passed on.
+
+Merchants and their clerks were throwing open the solid wooden doors of
+their shops. Polite but cool were the glances they cast upon Blythe as
+he lounged tentatively by with the remains of his old jaunty air; for
+they were his creditors almost without exception.
+
+At the little fountain in the _plaza_ he made an apology for a toilet
+with his wetted handkerchief. Across the open square filed the dolorous
+line of friends of the prisoners in the _calaboza_, bearing the morning
+meal of the immured. The food in their hands aroused small longing in
+Blythe. It was drink that his soul craved, or money to buy it.
+
+In the streets he met many with whom he had been friends and equals,
+and whose patience and liberality he had gradually exhausted. Willard
+Geddie and Paula cantered past him with the coolest of nods, returning
+from their daily horseback ride along the old Indian road. Keogh passed
+him at another corner, whistling cheerfully and bearing a prize of
+newly-laid eggs for the breakfast of himself and Clancy. The jovial
+scout of Fortune was one of Blythe’s victims who had plunged his hand
+oftenest into his pocket to aid him. But now it seemed that Keogh, too,
+had fortified himself against further invasions. His curt greeting and
+the ominous light in his full, grey eye quickened the steps of
+“Beelzebub,” whom desperation had almost incited to attempt an
+additional “loan.”
+
+Three drinking shops the forlorn one next visited in succession. In all
+of these his money, his credit and his welcome had long since been
+spent; but Blythe felt that he would have fawned in the dust at the
+feet of an enemy that morning for one draught of _aguardiente_. In two
+of the _pulperias_ his courageous petition for drink was met with a
+refusal so polite that it stung worse than abuse. The third
+establishment had acquired something of American methods; and here he
+was seized bodily and cast out upon his hands and knees.
+
+This physical indignity caused a singular change in the man. As he
+picked himself up and walked away, an expression of absolute relief
+came upon his features. The specious and conciliatory smile that had
+been graven there was succeeded by a look of calm and sinister resolve.
+“Beelzebub” had been floundering in the sea of improbity, holding by a
+slender life-line to the respectable world that had cast him overboard.
+He must have felt that with this ultimate shock the line had snapped,
+and have experienced the welcome ease of the drowning swimmer who has
+ceased to struggle.
+
+Blythe walked to the next corner and stood there while he brushed the
+sand from his garments and re-polished his glasses.
+
+“I’ve got to do it—oh, I’ve got to do it,” he told himself, aloud. “If
+I had a quart of rum I believe I could stave it off yet—for a little
+while. But there’s no more rum for—‘Beelzebub,’ as they call me. By the
+flames of Tartarus! if I’m to sit at the right hand of Satan somebody
+has got to pay the court expenses. You’ll have to pony up, Mr. Frank
+Goodwin. You’re a good fellow; but a gentleman must draw the line at
+being kicked into the gutter. Blackmail isn’t a pretty word, but it’s
+the next station on the road I’m travelling.”
+
+With purpose in his steps Blythe now moved rapidly through the town by
+way of its landward environs. He passed through the squalid quarters of
+the improvident negroes and on beyond the picturesque shacks of the
+poorer _mestizos_. From many points along his course he could see,
+through the umbrageous glades, the house of Frank Goodwin on its wooded
+hill. And as he crossed the little bridge over the lagoon he saw the
+old Indian, Galvez, scrubbing at the wooden slab that bore the name of
+Miraflores. Beyond the lagoon the lands of Goodwin began to slope
+gently upward. A grassy road, shaded by a munificent and diverse array
+of tropical flora wound from the edge of an outlying banana grove to
+the dwelling. Blythe took this road with long and purposeful strides.
+
+Goodwin was seated on his coolest gallery, dictating letters to his
+secretary, a sallow and capable native youth. The household adhered to
+the American plan of breakfast; and that meal had been a thing of the
+past for the better part of an hour.
+
+The castaway walked to the steps, and flourished a hand.
+
+“Good morning, Blythe,” said Goodwin, looking up. “Come in and have a
+chair. Anything I can do for you?”
+
+“I want to speak to you in private.”
+
+Goodwin nodded at his secretary, who strolled out under a mango tree
+and lit a cigarette. Blythe took the chair that he had left vacant.
+
+“I want some money,” he began, doggedly.
+
+“I’m sorry,” said Goodwin, with equal directness, “but you can’t have
+any. You’re drinking yourself to death, Blythe. Your friends have done
+all they could to help you to brace up. You won’t help yourself.
+There’s no use furnishing you with money to ruin yourself with any
+longer.”
+
+“Dear man,” said Blythe, tilting back his chair, “it isn’t a question
+of social economy now. It’s past that. I like you, Goodwin; and I’ve
+come to stick a knife between your ribs. I was kicked out of Espada’s
+saloon this morning; and Society owes me reparation for my wounded
+feelings.”
+
+“I didn’t kick you out.”
+
+“No; but in a general way you represent Society; and in a particular
+way you represent my last chance. I’ve had to come down to it, old
+man—I tried to do it a month ago when Losada’s man was here turning
+things over; but I couldn’t do it then. Now it’s different. I want a
+thousand dollars, Goodwin; and you’ll have to give it to me.”
+
+“Only last week,” said Goodwin, with a smile, “a silver dollar was all
+you were asking for.”
+
+“An evidence,” said Blythe, flippantly, “that I was still
+virtuous—though under heavy pressure. The wages of sin should be
+something higher than a _peso_ worth forty-eight cents. Let’s talk
+business. I am the villain in the third act; and I must have my
+merited, if only temporary, triumph. I saw you collar the late
+president’s valiseful of boodle. Oh, I know it’s blackmail; but I’m
+liberal about the price. I know I’m a cheap villain—one of the regular
+sawmill-drama kind—but you’re one of my particular friends, and I don’t
+want to stick you hard.”
+
+“Suppose you go into the details,” suggested Goodwin, calmly arranging
+his letters on the table.
+
+“All right,” said “Beelzebub.” “I like the way you take it. I despise
+histrionics; so you will please prepare yourself for the facts without
+any red fire, calcium or grace notes on the saxophone.
+
+“On the night that His Fly-by-night Excellency arrived in town I was
+very drunk. You will excuse the pride with which I state that fact; but
+it was quite a feat for me to attain that desirable state. Somebody had
+left a cot out under the orange trees in the yard of Madama Ortiz’s
+hotel. I stepped over the wall, laid down upon it, and fell asleep. I
+was awakened by an orange that dropped from the tree upon my nose; and
+I laid there for awhile cursing Sir Isaac Newton, or whoever it was
+that invented gravitation, for not confining his theory to apples.
+
+“And then along came Mr. Miraflores and his true-love with the treasury
+in a valise, and went into the hotel. Next you hove in sight, and held
+a pow-wow with the tonsorial artist who insisted upon talking shop
+after hours. I tried to slumber again; but once more my rest was
+disturbed—this time by the noise of the popgun that went off upstairs.
+Then that valise came crashing down into an orange tree just above my
+head; and I arose from my couch, not knowing when it might begin to
+rain Saratoga trunks. When the army and the constabulary began to
+arrive, with their medals and decorations hastily pinned to their
+pajamas, and their snickersnees drawn, I crawled into the welcome
+shadow of a banana plant. I remained there for an hour, by which time
+the excitement and the people had cleared away. And then, my dear
+Goodwin—excuse me—I saw you sneak back and pluck that ripe and juicy
+valise from the orange tree. I followed you, and saw you take it to
+your own house. A hundred-thousand-dollar crop from one orange tree in
+a season about breaks the record of the fruit-growing industry.
+
+“Being a gentleman at that time, of course, I never mentioned the
+incident to anyone. But this morning I was kicked out of a saloon, my
+code of honour is all out at the elbows, and I’d sell my mother’s
+prayer-book for three fingers of _aguardiente_. I’m not putting on the
+screws hard. It ought to be worth a thousand to you for me to have
+slept on that cot through the whole business without waking up and
+seeing anything.”
+
+Goodwin opened two more letters, and made memoranda in pencil on them.
+Then he called “Manuel!” to his secretary, who came, spryly.
+
+“The _Ariel_—when does she sail?” asked Goodwin.
+
+“Señor,” answered the youth, “at three this afternoon. She drops
+down-coast to Punta Soledad to complete her cargo of fruit. From there
+she sails for New Orleans without delay.”
+
+“_Bueno!_” said Goodwin. “These letters may wait yet awhile.”
+
+The secretary returned to his cigarette under the mango tree.
+
+“In round numbers,” said Goodwin, facing Blythe squarely, “how much
+money do you owe in this town, not including the sums you have
+‘borrowed’ from me?”
+
+“Five hundred—at a rough guess,” answered Blythe, lightly.
+
+“Go somewhere in the town and draw up a schedule of your debts,” said
+Goodwin. “Come back here in two hours, and I will send Manuel with the
+money to pay them. I will also have a decent outfit of clothing ready
+for you. You will sail on the _Ariel_ at three. Manuel will accompany
+you as far as the deck of the steamer. There he will hand you one
+thousand dollars in cash. I suppose that we needn’t discuss what you
+will be expected to do in return.”
+
+“Oh, I understand,” piped Blythe, cheerily. “I was asleep all the time
+on the cot under Madama Ortiz’s orange trees; and I shake off the dust
+of Coralio forever. I’ll play fair. No more of the lotus for me. Your
+proposition is O. K. You’re a good fellow, Goodwin; and I let you off
+light. I’ll agree to everything. But in the meantime—I’ve a devil of a
+thirst on, old man—”
+
+“Not a _centavo_,” said Goodwin, firmly, “until you are on board the
+_Ariel_. You would be drunk in thirty minutes if you had money now.”
+
+But he noticed the blood-streaked eyeballs, the relaxed form and the
+shaking hands of “Beelzebub;” and he stepped into the dining room
+through the low window, and brought out a glass and a decanter of
+brandy.
+
+“Take a bracer, anyway, before you go,” he proposed, even as a man to
+the friend whom he entertains.
+
+“Beelzebub” Blythe’s eyes glistened at the sight of the solace for
+which his soul burned. To-day for the first time his poisoned nerves
+had been denied their steadying dose; and their retort was a mounting
+torment. He grasped the decanter and rattled its crystal mouth against
+the glass in his trembling hand. He flushed the glass, and then stood
+erect, holding it aloft for an instant. For one fleeting moment he held
+his head above the drowning waves of his abyss. He nodded easily at
+Goodwin, raised his brimming glass and murmured a “health” that men had
+used in his ancient Paradise Lost. And then so suddenly that he spilled
+the brandy over his hand, he set down his glass, untasted.
+
+“In two hours,” his dry lips muttered to Goodwin, as he marched down
+the steps and turned his face toward the town.
+
+In the edge of the cool banana grove “Beelzebub” halted, and snapped
+the tongue of his belt buckle into another hole.
+
+“I couldn’t do it,” he explained, feverishly, to the waving banana
+fronds. “I wanted to, but I couldn’t. A gentleman can’t drink with the
+man that he blackmails.”
+
+
+
+
+XII
+SHOES
+
+
+John De Graffenreid Atwood ate of the lotus, root, stem, and flower.
+The tropics gobbled him up. He plunged enthusiastically into his work,
+which was to try to forget Rosine.
+
+Now, they who dine on the lotus rarely consume it plain. There is a
+sauce _au diable_ that goes with it; and the distillers are the chefs
+who prepare it. And on Johnny’s menu card it read “brandy.” With a
+bottle between them, he and Billy Keogh would sit on the porch of the
+little consulate at night and roar out great, indecorous songs, until
+the natives, slipping hastily past, would shrug a shoulder and mutter
+things to themselves about the “_Americanos diablos_.”
+
+One day Johnny’s _mozo_ brought the mail and dumped it on the table.
+Johnny leaned from his hammock, and fingered the four or five letters
+dejectedly. Keogh was sitting on the edge of the table chopping lazily
+with a paper knife at the legs of a centipede that was crawling among
+the stationery. Johnny was in that phase of lotus-eating when all the
+world tastes bitter in one’s mouth.
+
+“Same old thing!” he complained. “Fool people writing for information
+about the country. They want to know all about raising fruit, and how
+to make a fortune without work. Half of ’em don’t even send stamps for
+a reply. They think a consul hasn’t anything to do but write letters.
+Slit those envelopes for me, old man, and see what they want. I’m
+feeling too rocky to move.”
+
+Keogh, acclimated beyond all possibility of ill-humour, drew his chair
+to the table with smiling compliance on his rose-pink countenance, and
+began to slit open the letters. Four of them were from citizens in
+various parts of the United States who seemed to regard the consul at
+Coralio as a cyclopædia of information. They asked long lists of
+questions, numerically arranged, about the climate, products,
+possibilities, laws, business chances, and statistics of the country in
+which the consul had the honour of representing his own government.
+
+“Write ’em, please, Billy,” said that inert official, “just a line,
+referring them to the latest consular report. Tell ’em the State
+Department will be delighted to furnish the literary gems. Sign my
+name. Don’t let your pen scratch, Billy; it’ll keep me awake.”
+
+“Don’t snore,” said Keogh, amiably, “and I’ll do your work for you. You
+need a corps of assistants, anyhow. Don’t see how you ever get out a
+report. Wake up a minute!—here’s one more letter—it’s from your own
+town, too—Dalesburg.”
+
+“That so?” murmured Johnny showing a mild and obligatory interest.
+“What’s it about?”
+
+“Postmaster writes,” explained Keogh. “Says a citizen of the town wants
+some facts and advice from you. Says the citizen has an idea in his
+head of coming down where you are and opening a shoe store. Wants to
+know if you think the business would pay. Says he’s heard of the boom
+along this coast, and wants to get in on the ground floor.”
+
+In spite of the heat and his bad temper, Johnny’s hammock swayed with
+his laughter. Keogh laughed too; and the pet monkey on the top shelf of
+the bookcase chattered in shrill sympathy with the ironical reception
+of the letter from Dalesburg.
+
+“Great bunions!” exclaimed the consul. “Shoe store! What’ll they ask
+about next, I wonder? Overcoat factory, I reckon. Say, Billy—of our
+3,000 citizens, how many do you suppose ever had on a pair of shoes?”
+
+Keogh reflected judicially.
+
+“Let’s see—there’s you and me and—”
+
+“Not me,” said Johnny, promptly and incorrectly, holding up a foot
+encased in a disreputable deerskin _zapato_. “I haven’t been a victim
+to shoes in months.”
+
+“But you’ve got ’em, though,” went on Keogh. “And there’s Goodwin and
+Blanchard and Geddie and old Lutz and Doc Gregg and that Italian that’s
+agent for the banana company, and there’s old Delgado—no; he wears
+sandals. And, oh, yes; there’s Madama Ortiz, ‘what kapes the hotel’—she
+had on a pair of red slippers at the _baile_ the other night. And Miss
+Pasa, her daughter, that went to school in the States—she brought back
+some civilized notions in the way of footgear. And there’s the
+_comandante’s_ sister that dresses up her feet on feast-days—and Mrs.
+Geddie, who wears a two with a Castilian instep—and that’s about all
+the ladies. Let’s see—don’t some of the soldiers at the _cuartel_—no:
+that’s so; they’re allowed shoes only when on the march. In barracks
+they turn their little toeses out to grass.”
+
+“’Bout right,” agreed the consul. “Not over twenty out of the three
+thousand ever felt leather on their walking arrangements. Oh, yes;
+Coralio is just the town for an enterprising shoe store—that doesn’t
+want to part with its goods. Wonder if old Patterson is trying to jolly
+me! He always was full of things he called jokes. Write him a letter,
+Billy. I’ll dictate it. We’ll jolly him back a few.”
+
+Keogh dipped his pen, and wrote at Johnny’s dictation. With many
+pauses, filled in with smoke and sundry travellings of the bottle and
+glasses, the following reply to the Dalesburg communication was
+perpetrated:
+
+Mr. Obadiah Patterson,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+ _Dear Sir:_ In reply to your favour of July 2d, I have the honour
+ to inform you that, according to my opinion, there is no place on
+ the habitable globe that presents to the eye stronger evidence of
+ the need of a first-class shoe store than does the town of Coralio.
+ There are 3,000 inhabitants in the place, and not a single shoe
+ store! The situation speaks for itself. This coast is rapidly
+ becoming the goal of enterprising business men, but the shoe
+ business is one that has been sadly overlooked or neglected. In
+ fact, there are a considerable number of our citizens actually
+ without shoes at present.
+ Besides the want above mentioned, there is also a crying need for a
+ brewery, a college of higher mathematics, a coal yard, and a clean
+ and intellectual Punch and Judy show. I have the honour to be, sir,
+
+
+Your Obt. Servant,
+JOHN DE GRAFFENREID ATWOOD,
+U. S. Consul at Coralio.
+
+
+P.S.—Hello! Uncle Obadiah. How’s the old burg racking along? What would
+the government do without you and me? Look out for a green-headed
+parrot and a bunch of bananas soon, from your old friend
+
+
+JOHNNY.
+
+
+“I throw in that postscript,” explained the consul, “so Uncle Obadiah
+won’t take offence at the official tone of the letter! Now, Billy, you
+get that correspondence fixed up, and send Pancho to the post-office
+with it. The _Ariadne_ takes the mail out to-morrow if they make up
+that load of fruit to-day.”
+
+The night programme in Coralio never varied. The recreations of the
+people were soporific and flat. They wandered about, barefoot and
+aimless, speaking lowly and smoking cigar or cigarette. Looking down on
+the dimly lighted ways one seemed to see a threading maze of brunette
+ghosts tangled with a procession of insane fireflies. In some houses
+the thrumming of lugubrious guitars added to the depression of the
+_triste_ night. Giant tree-frogs rattled in the foliage as loudly as
+the end man’s “bones” in a minstrel troupe. By nine o’clock the streets
+were almost deserted.
+
+Nor at the consulate was there often a change of bill. Keogh would come
+there nightly, for Coralio’s one cool place was the little seaward
+porch of that official residence.
+
+The brandy would be kept moving; and before midnight sentiment would
+begin to stir in the heart of the self-exiled consul. Then he would
+relate to Keogh the story of his ended romance. Each night Keogh would
+listen patiently to the tale, and be ready with untiring sympathy.
+
+“But don’t you think for a minute”—thus Johnny would always conclude
+his woeful narrative—“that I’m grieving about that girl, Billy. I’ve
+forgotten her. She never enters my mind. If she were to enter that door
+right now, my pulse wouldn’t gain a beat. That’s all over long ago.”
+
+“Don’t I know it?” Keogh would answer. “Of course you’ve forgotten her.
+Proper thing to do. Wasn’t quite O. K. of her to listen to the knocks
+that—er—Dink Pawson kept giving you.”
+
+“Pink Dawson!”—a world of contempt would be in Johnny’s tones—“Poor
+white trash! That’s what he was. Had five hundred acres of farming
+land, though; and that counted. Maybe I’ll have a chance to get back at
+him some day. The Dawsons weren’t anybody. Everybody in Alabama knows
+the Atwoods. Say, Billy—did you know my mother was a De Graffenreid?”
+
+“Why, no,” Keogh would say; “is that so?” He had heard it some three
+hundred times.
+
+“Fact. The De Graffenreids of Hancock County. But I never think of that
+girl any more, do I, Billy?”
+
+“Not for a minute, my boy,” would be the last sounds heard by the
+conqueror of Cupid.
+
+At this point Johnny would fall into a gentle slumber, and Keogh would
+saunter out to his own shack under the calabash tree at the edge of the
+plaza.
+
+In a day or two the letter from the Dalesburg postmaster and its answer
+had been forgotten by the Coralio exiles. But on the 26th day of July
+the fruit of the reply appeared upon the tree of events.
+
+The _Andador_, a fruit steamer that visited Coralio regularly, drew
+into the offing and anchored. The beach was lined with spectators while
+the quarantine doctor and the custom-house crew rowed out to attend to
+their duties.
+
+An hour later Billy Keogh lounged into the consulate, clean and cool in
+his linen clothes, and grinning like a pleased shark.
+
+“Guess what?” he said to Johnny, lounging in his hammock.
+
+“Too hot to guess,” said Johnny, lazily.
+
+“Your shoe-store man’s come,” said Keogh, rolling the sweet morsel on
+his tongue, “with a stock of goods big enough to supply the continent
+as far down as Terra del Fuego. They’re carting his cases over to the
+custom-house now. Six barges full they brought ashore and have paddled
+back for the rest. Oh, ye saints in glory! won’t there be regalements
+in the air when he gets onto the joke and has an interview with Mr.
+Consul? It’ll be worth nine years in the tropics just to witness that
+one joyful moment.”
+
+Keogh loved to take his mirth easily. He selected a clean place on the
+matting and lay upon the floor. The walls shook with his enjoyment.
+Johnny turned half over and blinked.
+
+“Don’t tell me,” he said, “that anybody was fool enough to take that
+letter seriously.”
+
+“Four-thousand-dollar stock of goods!” gasped Keogh, in ecstasy. “Talk
+about coals to Newcastle! Why didn’t he take a ship-load of palm-leaf
+fans to Spitzbergen while he was about it? Saw the old codger on the
+beach. You ought to have been there when he put on his specs and
+squinted at the five hundred or so barefooted citizens standing
+around.”
+
+“Are you telling the truth, Billy?” asked the consul, weakly.
+
+“Am I? You ought to see the buncoed gentleman’s daughter he brought
+along. Looks! She makes the brick-dust señoritas here look like
+tar-babies.”
+
+“Go on,” said Johnny, “if you can stop that asinine giggling. I hate to
+see a grown man make a laughing hyena of himself.”
+
+“Name is Hemstetter,” went on Keogh. “He’s a— Hello! what’s the matter
+now?”
+
+Johnny’s moccasined feet struck the floor with a thud as he wriggled
+out of his hammock.
+
+“Get up, you idiot,” he said, sternly, “or I’ll brain you with this
+inkstand. That’s Rosine and her father. Gad! what a drivelling idiot
+old Patterson is! Get up, here, Billy Keogh, and help me. What the
+devil are we going to do? Has all the world gone crazy?”
+
+Keogh rose and dusted himself. He managed to regain a decorous
+demeanour.
+
+“Situation has got to be met, Johnny,” he said, with some success at
+seriousness. “I didn’t think about its being your girl until you spoke.
+First thing to do is to get them comfortable quarters. You go down and
+face the music, and I’ll trot out to Goodwin’s and see if Mrs. Goodwin
+won’t take them in. They’ve got the decentest house in town.”
+
+“Bless you, Billy!” said the consul. “I knew you wouldn’t desert me.
+The world’s bound to come to an end, but maybe we can stave it off for
+a day or two.”
+
+Keogh hoisted his umbrella and set out for Goodwin’s house. Johnny put
+on his coat and hat. He picked up the brandy bottle, but set it down
+again without drinking, and marched bravely down to the beach.
+
+In the shade of the custom-house walls he found Mr. Hemstetter and
+Rosine surrounded by a mass of gaping citizens. The customs officers
+were ducking and scraping, while the captain of the _Andador_
+interpreted the business of the new arrivals. Rosine looked healthy and
+very much alive. She was gazing at the strange scenes around her with
+amused interest. There was a faint blush upon her round cheek as she
+greeted her old admirer. Mr. Hemstetter shook hands with Johnny in a
+very friendly way. He was an oldish, impractical man—one of that
+numerous class of erratic business men who are forever dissatisfied,
+and seeking a change.
+
+“I am very glad to see you, John—may I call you John?” he said. “Let me
+thank you for your prompt answer to our postmaster’s letter of inquiry.
+He volunteered to write to you on my behalf. I was looking about for
+something different in the way of a business in which the profits would
+be greater. I had noticed in the papers that this coast was receiving
+much attention from investors. I am extremely grateful for your advice
+to come. I sold out everything that I possess, and invested the
+proceeds in as fine a stock of shoes as could be bought in the North.
+You have a picturesque town here, John. I hope business will be as good
+as your letter justifies me in expecting.”
+
+Johnny’s agony was abbreviated by the arrival of Keogh, who hurried up
+with the news that Mrs. Goodwin would be much pleased to place rooms at
+the disposal of Mr. Hemstetter and his daughter. So there Mr.
+Hemstetter and Rosine were at once conducted and left to recuperate
+from the fatigue of the voyage, while Johnny went down to see that the
+cases of shoes were safely stored in the customs warehouse pending
+their examination by the officials. Keogh, grinning like a shark,
+skirmished about to find Goodwin, to instruct him not to expose to Mr.
+Hemstetter the true state of Coralio as a shoe market until Johnny had
+been given a chance to redeem the situation, if such a thing were
+possible.
+
+That night the consul and Keogh held a desperate consultation on the
+breezy porch of the consulate.
+
+“Send ’em back home,” began Keogh, reading Johnny’s thoughts.
+
+“I would,” said Johnny, after a little silence; “but I’ve been lying to
+you, Billy.”
+
+“All right about that,” said Keogh, affably.
+
+“I’ve told you hundreds of times,” said Johnny, slowly, “that I had
+forgotten that girl, haven’t I?”
+
+“About three hundred and seventy-five,” admitted the monument of
+patience.
+
+“I lied,” repeated the consul, “every time. I never forgot her for one
+minute. I was an obstinate ass for running away just because she said
+‘No’ once. And I was too proud a fool to go back. I talked with Rosine
+a few minutes this evening up at Goodwin’s. I found out one thing. You
+remember that farmer fellow who was always after her?”
+
+“Dink Pawson?” asked Keogh.
+
+“Pink Dawson. Well, he wasn’t a hill of beans to her. She says she
+didn’t believe a word of the things he told her about me. But I’m sewed
+up now, Billy. That tomfool letter we sent ruined whatever chance I had
+left. She’ll despise me when she finds out that her old father has been
+made the victim of a joke that a decent school boy wouldn’t have been
+guilty of. Shoes! Why he couldn’t sell twenty pairs of shoes in Coralio
+if he kept store here for twenty years. You put a pair of shoes on one
+of these Caribs or Spanish brown boys and what’d he do? Stand on his
+head and squeal until he’d kicked ’em off. None of ’em ever wore shoes
+and they never will. If I send ’em back home I’ll have to tell the
+whole story, and what’ll she think of me? I want that girl worse than
+ever, Billy, and now when she’s in reach I’ve lost her forever because
+I tried to be funny when the thermometer was at 102.”
+
+“Keep cheerful,” said the optimistic Keogh. “And let ’em open the
+store. I’ve been busy myself this afternoon. We can stir up a temporary
+boom in foot-gear anyhow. I’ll buy six pairs when the doors open. I’ve
+been around and seen all the fellows and explained the catastrophe.
+They’ll all buy shoes like they was centipedes. Frank Goodwin will take
+cases of ’em. The Geddies want about eleven pairs between ’em. Clancy
+is going to invest the savings of weeks, and even old Doc Gregg wants
+three pairs of alligator-hide slippers if they’ve got any tens.
+Blanchard got a look at Miss Hemstetter; and as he’s a Frenchman, no
+less than a dozen pairs will do for him.”
+
+“A dozen customers,” said Johnny, “for a $4,000 stock of shoes! It
+won’t work. There’s a big problem here to figure out. You go home,
+Billy, and leave me alone. I’ve got to work at it all by myself. Take
+that bottle of Three-star along with you—no, sir; not another ounce of
+booze for the United States consul. I’ll sit here to-night and pull out
+the think stop. If there’s a soft place on this proposition anywhere
+I’ll land on it. If there isn’t there’ll be another wreck to the credit
+of the gorgeous tropics.”
+
+Keogh left, feeling that he could be of no use. Johnny laid a handful
+of cigars on a table and stretched himself in a steamer chair. When the
+sudden daylight broke, silvering the harbour ripples, he was still
+sitting there. Then he got up, whistling a little tune, and took his
+bath.
+
+At nine o’clock he walked down to the dingy little cable office and
+hung for half an hour over a blank. The result of his application was
+the following message, which he signed and had transmitted at a cost of
+$33:
+
+TO PINKNEY DAWSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+ Draft for $100 comes to you next mail. Ship me immediately 500
+ pounds stiff, dry cockleburrs. New use here in arts. Market price
+ twenty cents pound. Further orders likely. Rush.
+
+
+
+
+XIII
+SHIPS
+
+
+Within a week a suitable building had been secured in the Calle Grande,
+and Mr. Hemstetter’s stock of shoes arranged upon their shelves. The
+rent of the store was moderate; and the stock made a fine showing of
+neat white boxes, attractively displayed.
+
+Johnny’s friends stood by him loyally. On the first day Keogh strolled
+into the store in a casual kind of way about once every hour, and
+bought shoes. After he had purchased a pair each of extension soles,
+congress gaiters, button kids, low-quartered calfs, dancing pumps,
+rubber boots, tans of various hues, tennis shoes and flowered slippers,
+he sought out Johnny to be prompted as to names of other kinds that he
+might inquire for. The other English-speaking residents also played
+their parts nobly by buying often and liberally. Keogh was grand
+marshal, and made them distribute their patronage, thus keeping up a
+fair run of custom for several days.
+
+Mr. Hemstetter was gratified by the amount of business done thus far;
+but expressed surprise that the natives were so backward with their
+custom.
+
+“Oh, they’re awfully shy,” explained Johnny, as he wiped his forehead
+nervously. “They’ll get the habit pretty soon. They’ll come with a rush
+when they do come.”
+
+One afternoon Keogh dropped into the consul’s office, chewing an
+unlighted cigar thoughtfully.
+
+“Got anything up your sleeve?” he inquired of Johnny. “If you have it’s
+about time to show it. If you can borrow some gent’s hat in the
+audience, and make a lot of customers for an idle stock of shoes come
+out of it, you’d better spiel. The boys have all laid in enough
+footwear to last ’em ten years; and there’s nothing doing in the shoe
+store but dolcy far nienty. I just came by there. Your venerable victim
+was standing in the door, gazing through his specs at the bare toes
+passing by his emporium. The natives here have got the true artistic
+temperament. Me and Clancy took eighteen tintypes this morning in two
+hours. There’s been but one pair of shoes sold all day. Blanchard went
+in and bought a pair of fur-lined house-slippers because he thought he
+saw Miss Hemstetter go into the store. I saw him throw the slippers
+into the lagoon afterwards.”
+
+“There’s a Mobile fruit steamer coming in to-morrow or next day,” said
+Johnny. “We can’t do anything until then.”
+
+“What are you going to do—try to create a demand?”
+
+“Political economy isn’t your strong point,” said the consul,
+impudently. “You can’t create a demand. But you can create a necessity
+for a demand. That’s what I am going to do.”
+
+Two weeks after the consul sent his cable, a fruit steamer brought him
+a huge, mysterious brown bale of some unknown commodity. Johnny’s
+influence with the custom-house people was sufficiently strong for him
+to get the goods turned over to him without the usual inspection. He
+had the bale taken to the consulate and snugly stowed in the back room.
+
+That night he ripped open a corner of it and took out a handful of the
+cockleburrs. He examined them with the care with which a warrior
+examines his arms before he goes forth to battle for his lady-love and
+life. The burrs were the ripe August product, as hard as filberts, and
+bristling with spines as tough and sharp as needles. Johnny whistled
+softly a little tune, and went out to find Billy Keogh.
+
+Later in the night, when Coralio was steeped in slumber, he and Billy
+went forth into the deserted streets with their coats bulging like
+balloons. All up and down the Calle Grande they went, sowing the sharp
+burrs carefully in the sand, along the narrow sidewalks, in every foot
+of grass between the silent houses. And then they took the side streets
+and by-ways, missing none. No place where the foot of man, woman or
+child might fall was slighted. Many trips they made to and from the
+prickly hoard. And then, nearly at the dawn, they laid themselves down
+to rest calmly, as great generals do after planning a victory according
+to the revised tactics, and slept, knowing that they had sowed with the
+accuracy of Satan sowing tares and the perseverance of Paul planting.
+
+With the rising sun came the purveyors of fruits and meats, and
+arranged their wares in and around the little market-house. At one end
+of the town near the seashore the market-house stood; and the sowing of
+the burrs had not been carried that far. The dealers waited long past
+the hour when their sales usually began. None came to buy. “_Qué hay?_”
+they began to exclaim, one to another.
+
+At their accustomed time, from every ’dobe and palm hut and
+grass-thatched shack and dim _patio_ glided women—black women, brown
+women, lemon-colored women, women dun and yellow and tawny. They were
+the marketers starting to purchase the family supply of cassava,
+plantains, meat, fowls, and tortillas. Décolleté they were and
+bare-armed and bare-footed, with a single skirt reaching below the
+knee. Stolid and ox-eyed, they stepped from their doorways into the
+narrow paths or upon the soft grass of the streets.
+
+The first to emerge uttered ambiguous squeals, and raised one foot
+quickly. Another step and they sat down, with shrill cries of alarm, to
+pick at the new and painful insects that had stung them upon the feet.
+“_Qué picadores diablos!_” they screeched to one another across the
+narrow ways. Some tried the grass instead of the paths, but there they
+were also stung and bitten by the strange little prickly balls. They
+plumped down in the grass, and added their lamentations to those of
+their sisters in the sandy paths. All through the town was heard the
+plaint of the feminine jabber. The venders in the market still wondered
+why no customers came.
+
+Then men, lords of the earth, came forth. They, too, began to hop, to
+dance, to limp, and to curse. They stood stranded and foolish, or
+stooped to pluck at the scourge that attacked their feet and ankles.
+Some loudly proclaimed the pest to be poisonous spiders of an unknown
+species.
+
+And then the children ran out for their morning romp. And now to the
+uproar was added the howls of limping infants and cockleburred
+childhood. Every minute the advancing day brought forth fresh victims.
+
+Doña Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas stepped from her
+honoured doorway, as was her daily custom, to procure fresh bread from
+the _panaderia_ across the street. She was clad in a skirt of flowered
+yellow satin, a chemise of ruffled linen, and wore a purple mantilla
+from the looms of Spain. Her lemon-tinted feet, alas! were bare. Her
+progress was majestic, for were not her ancestors hidalgos of Aragon?
+Three steps she made across the velvety grass, and set her aristocratic
+sole upon a bunch of Johnny’s burrs. Doña Maria Castillas y Buenventura
+de las Casas emitted a yowl even as a wild-cat. Turning about, she fell
+upon hands and knees, and crawled—ay, like a beast of the field she
+crawled back to her honourable door-sill.
+
+Don Señor Ildefonso Federico Valdazar, _Juez de la Paz_, weighing
+twenty stone, attempted to convey his bulk to the _pulperia_ at the
+corner of the plaza in order to assuage his matutinal thirst. The first
+plunge of his unshod foot into the cool grass struck a concealed mine.
+Don Ildefonso fell like a crumpled cathedral, crying out that he had
+been fatally bitten by a deadly scorpion. Everywhere were the shoeless
+citizens hopping, stumbling, limping, and picking from their feet the
+venomous insects that had come in a single night to harass them.
+
+The first to perceive the remedy was Estebán Delgado, the barber, a man
+of travel and education. Sitting upon a stone, he plucked burrs from
+his toes, and made oration:
+
+“Behold, my friends, these bugs of the devil! I know them well. They
+soar through the skies in swarms like pigeons. These are the dead ones
+that fell during the night. In Yucatan I have seen them as large as
+oranges. Yes! There they hiss like serpents, and have wings like bats.
+It is the shoes—the shoes that one needs! _Zapatos—zapatos para mi!_”
+
+Estebán hobbled to Mr. Hemstetter’s store, and bought shoes. Coming
+out, he swaggered down the street with impunity, reviling loudly the
+bugs of the devil. The suffering ones sat up or stood upon one foot and
+beheld the immune barber. Men, women and children took up the cry:
+“_Zapatos! zapatos!_”
+
+The necessity for the demand had been created. The demand followed.
+That day Mr. Hemstetter sold three hundred pairs of shoes.
+
+“It is really surprising,” he said to Johnny, who came up in the
+evening to help him straighten out the stock, “how trade is picking up.
+Yesterday I made but three sales.”
+
+“I told you they’d whoop things up when they got started,” said the
+consul.
+
+“I think I shall order a dozen more cases of goods, to keep the stock
+up,” said Mr. Hemstetter, beaming through his spectacles.
+
+“I wouldn’t send in any orders yet,” advised Johnny. “Wait till you see
+how the trade holds up.”
+
+Each night Johnny and Keogh sowed the crop that grew dollars by day. At
+the end of ten days two-thirds of the stock of shoes had been sold; and
+the stock of cockleburrs was exhausted. Johnny cabled to Pink Dawson
+for another 500 pounds, paying twenty cents per pound as before. Mr.
+Hemstetter carefully made up an order for $1500 worth of shoes from
+Northern firms. Johnny hung about the store until this order was ready
+for the mail, and succeeded in destroying it before it reached the
+postoffice.
+
+That night he took Rosine under the mango tree by Goodwin’s porch, and
+confessed everything. She looked him in the eye, and said: “You are a
+very wicked man. Father and I will go back home. You say it was a joke?
+I think it is a very serious matter.”
+
+But at the end of half an hour’s argument the conversation had been
+turned upon a different subject. The two were considering the
+respective merits of pale blue and pink wall paper with which the old
+colonial mansion of the Atwoods in Dalesburg was to be decorated after
+the wedding.
+
+On the next morning Johnny confessed to Mr. Hemstetter. The shoe
+merchant put on his spectacles, and said through them: “You strike me
+as being a most extraordinary young scamp. If I had not managed this
+enterprise with good business judgment my entire stock of goods might
+have been a complete loss. Now, how do you propose to dispose of the
+rest of it?”
+
+When the second invoice of cockleburrs arrived Johnny loaded them and
+the remainder of the shoes into a schooner, and sailed down the coast
+to Alazan.
+
+There, in the same dark and diabolical manner, he repeated his success;
+and came back with a bag of money and not so much as a shoestring.
+
+And then he besought his great Uncle of the waving goatee and starred
+vest to accept his resignation, for the lotus no longer lured him. He
+hankered for the spinach and cress of Dalesburg.
+
+The services of Mr. William Terence Keogh as acting consul, _pro tem._,
+were suggested and accepted, and Johnny sailed with the Hemstetters
+back to his native shores.
+
+Keogh slipped into the sinecure of the American consulship with the
+ease that never left him even in such high places. The tintype
+establishment was soon to become a thing of the past, although its
+deadly work along the peaceful and helpless Spanish Main was never
+effaced. The restless partners were about to be off again, scouting
+ahead of the slow ranks of Fortune. But now they would take different
+ways. There were rumours of a promising uprising in Peru; and thither
+the martial Clancy would turn his adventurous steps. As for Keogh, he
+was figuring in his mind and on quires of Government letter-heads a
+scheme that dwarfed the art of misrepresenting the human countenance
+upon tin.
+
+“What suits me,” Keogh used to say, “in the way of a business
+proposition is something diversified that looks like a longer shot than
+it is—something in the way of a genteel graft that isn’t worked enough
+for the correspondence schools to be teaching it by mail. I take the
+long end; but I like to have at least as good a chance to win as a man
+learning to play poker on an ocean steamer, or running for governor of
+Texas on the Republican ticket. And when I cash in my winnings, I don’t
+want to find any widows’ and orphans’ chips in my stack.”
+
+The grass-grown globe was the green table on which Keogh gambled. The
+games he played were of his own invention. He was no grubber after the
+diffident dollar. Nor did he care to follow it with horn and hounds.
+Rather he loved to coax it with egregious and brilliant flies from its
+habitat in the waters of strange streams. Yet Keogh was a business man;
+and his schemes, in spite of their singularity, were as solidly set as
+the plans of a building contractor. In Arthur’s time Sir William Keogh
+would have been a Knight of the Round Table. In these modern days he
+rides abroad, seeking the Graft instead of the Grail.
+
+Three days after Johnny’s departure, two small schooners appeared off
+Coralio. After some delay a boat put off from one of them, and brought
+a sunburned young man ashore. This young man had a shrewd and
+calculating eye; and he gazed with amazement at the strange things that
+he saw. He found on the beach some one who directed him to the consul’s
+office; and thither he made his way at a nervous gait.
+
+Keogh was sprawled in the official chair, drawing caricatures of his
+Uncle’s head on an official pad of paper. He looked up at his visitor.
+
+“Where’s Johnny Atwood?” inquired the sunburned young man, in a
+business tone.
+
+“Gone,” said Keogh, working carefully at Uncle Sam’s necktie.
+
+“That’s just like him,” remarked the nut-brown one, leaning against the
+table. “He always was a fellow to gallivant around instead of ’tending
+to business. Will he be in soon?”
+
+“Don’t think so,” said Keogh, after a fair amount of deliberation.
+
+“I s’pose he’s out at some of his tomfoolery,” conjectured the visitor,
+in a tone of virtuous conviction. “Johnny never would stick to anything
+long enough to succeed. I wonder how he manages to run his business
+here, and never be ’round to look after it.”
+
+“I’m looking after the business just now,” admitted the _pro tem._
+consul.
+
+“Are you—then, say!—where’s the factory?”
+
+“What factory?” asked Keogh, with a mildly polite interest.
+
+“Why, the factory where they use them cockleburrs. Lord knows what they
+use ’em for, anyway! I’ve got the basements of both them ships out
+there loaded with ’em. I’ll give you a bargain in this lot. I’ve had
+every man, woman and child around Dalesburg that wasn’t busy pickin’
+’em for a month. I hired these ships to bring ’em over. Everybody
+thought I was crazy. Now, you can have this lot for fifteen cents a
+pound, delivered on land. And if you want more I guess old Alabam’ can
+come up to the demand. Johnny told me when he left home that if he
+struck anything down here that there was any money in he’d let me in on
+it. Shall I drive the ships in and hitch?”
+
+A look of supreme, almost incredulous, delight dawned in Keogh’s ruddy
+countenance. He dropped his pencil. His eyes turned upon the sunburned
+young man with joy in them mingled with fear lest his ecstasy should
+prove a dream.
+
+“For God’s sake, tell me,” said Keogh, earnestly, “are you Dink
+Pawson?”
+
+“My name is Pinkney Dawson,” said the cornerer of the cockleburr
+market.
+
+Billy Keogh slid rapturously and gently from his chair to his favourite
+strip of matting on the floor.
+
+There were not many sounds in Coralio on that sultry afternoon. Among
+those that were may be mentioned a noise of enraptured and unrighteous
+laughter from a prostrate Irish-American, while a sunburned young man,
+with a shrewd eye, looked on him with wonder and amazement. Also the
+“tramp, tramp, tramp” of many well-shod feet in the streets outside.
+Also the lonesome wash of the waves that beat along the historic shores
+of the Spanish Main.
+
+
+
+
+XIV
+MASTERS OF ARTS
+
+
+A two-inch stub of a blue pencil was the wand with which Keogh
+performed the preliminary acts of his magic. So, with this he covered
+paper with diagrams and figures while he waited for the United States
+of America to send down to Coralio a successor to Atwood, resigned.
+
+The new scheme that his mind had conceived, his stout heart indorsed,
+and his blue pencil corroborated, was laid around the characteristics
+and human frailties of the new president of Anchuria. These
+characteristics, and the situation out of which Keogh hoped to wrest a
+golden tribute, deserve chronicling contributive to the clear order of
+events.
+
+President Losada—many called him Dictator—was a man whose genius would
+have made him conspicuous even among Anglo-Saxons, had not that genius
+been intermixed with other traits that were petty and subversive. He
+had some of the lofty patriotism of Washington (the man he most
+admired), the force of Napoleon, and much of the wisdom of the sages.
+These characteristics might have justified him in the assumption of the
+title of “The Illustrious Liberator,” had they not been accompanied by
+a stupendous and amazing vanity that kept him in the less worthy ranks
+of the dictators.
+
+Yet he did his country great service. With a mighty grasp he shook it
+nearly free from the shackles of ignorance and sloth and the vermin
+that fed upon it, and all but made it a power in the council of
+nations. He established schools and hospitals, built roads, bridges,
+railroads and palaces, and bestowed generous subsidies upon the arts
+and sciences. He was the absolute despot and the idol of his people.
+The wealth of the country poured into his hands. Other presidents had
+been rapacious without reason. Losada amassed enormous wealth, but his
+people had their share of the benefits.
+
+The joint in his armour was his insatiate passion for monuments and
+tokens commemorating his glory. In every town he caused to be erected
+statues of himself bearing legends in praise of his greatness. In the
+walls of every public edifice, tablets were fixed reciting his
+splendour and the gratitude of his subjects. His statuettes and
+portraits were scattered throughout the land in every house and hut.
+One of the sycophants in his court painted him as St. John, with a halo
+and a train of attendants in full uniform. Losada saw nothing
+incongruous in this picture, and had it hung in a church in the
+capital. He ordered from a French sculptor a marble group including
+himself with Napoleon, Alexander the Great, and one or two others whom
+he deemed worthy of the honour.
+
+He ransacked Europe for decorations, employing policy, money and
+intrigue to cajole the orders he coveted from kings and rulers. On
+state occasions his breast was covered from shoulder to shoulder with
+crosses, stars, golden roses, medals and ribbons. It was said that the
+man who could contrive for him a new decoration, or invent some new
+method of extolling his greatness, might plunge a hand deep into the
+treasury.
+
+This was the man upon whom Billy Keogh had his eye. The gentle
+buccaneer had observed the rain of favors that fell upon those who
+ministered to the president’s vanities, and he did not deem it his duty
+to hoist his umbrella against the scattering drops of liquid fortune.
+
+In a few weeks the new consul arrived, releasing Keogh from his
+temporary duties. He was a young man fresh from college, who lived for
+botany alone. The consulate at Coralio gave him the opportunity to
+study tropical flora. He wore smoked glasses, and carried a green
+umbrella. He filled the cool, back porch of the consulate with plants
+and specimens so that space for a bottle and chair was not to be found.
+Keogh gazed on him sadly, but without rancour, and began to pack his
+gripsack. For his new plot against stagnation along the Spanish Main
+required of him a voyage overseas.
+
+Soon came the _Karlsefin_ again—she of the trampish habits—gleaning a
+cargo of cocoanuts for a speculative descent upon the New York market.
+Keogh was booked for a passage on the return trip.
+
+“Yes, I’m going to New York,” he explained to the group of his
+countrymen that had gathered on the beach to see him off. “But I’ll be
+back before you miss me. I’ve undertaken the art education of this
+piebald country, and I’m not the man to desert it while it’s in the
+early throes of tintypes.”
+
+With this mysterious declaration of his intentions Keogh boarded the
+_Karlsefin_.
+
+Ten days later, shivering, with the collar of his thin coat turned
+high, he burst into the studio of Carolus White at the top of a tall
+building in Tenth Street, New York City.
+
+Carolus White was smoking a cigarette and frying sausages over an oil
+stove. He was only twenty-three, and had noble theories about art.
+
+“Billy Keogh!” exclaimed White, extending the hand that was not busy
+with the frying pan. “From what part of the uncivilized world, I
+wonder!”
+
+“Hello, Carry,” said Keogh, dragging forward a stool, and holding his
+fingers close to the stove. “I’m glad I found you so soon. I’ve been
+looking for you all day in the directories and art galleries. The
+free-lunch man on the corner told me where you were, quick. I was sure
+you’d be painting pictures yet.”
+
+Keogh glanced about the studio with the shrewd eye of a connoisseur in
+business.
+
+“Yes, you can do it,” he declared, with many gentle nods of his head.
+“That big one in the corner with the angels and green clouds and
+band-wagon is just the sort of thing we want. What would you call that,
+Carry—scene from Coney Island, ain’t it?”
+
+“That,” said White, “I had intended to call ‘The Translation of
+Elijah,’ but you may be nearer right than I am.”
+
+“Name doesn’t matter,” said Keogh, largely; “it’s the frame and the
+varieties of paint that does the trick. Now, I can tell you in a minute
+what I want. I’ve come on a little voyage of two thousand miles to take
+you in with me on a scheme. I thought of you as soon as the scheme
+showed itself to me. How would you like to go back with me and paint a
+picture? Ninety days for the trip, and five thousand dollars for the
+job.”
+
+“Cereal food or hair-tonic posters?” asked White.
+
+“It isn’t an ad.”
+
+“What kind of a picture is it to be?”
+
+“It’s a long story,” said Keogh.
+
+“Go ahead with it. If you don’t mind, while you talk I’ll just keep my
+eye on these sausages. Let ’em get one shade deeper than a Vandyke
+brown and you spoil ’em.”
+
+Keogh explained his project. They were to return to Coralio, where
+White was to pose as a distinguished American portrait painter who was
+touring in the tropics as a relaxation from his arduous and
+remunerative professional labours. It was not an unreasonable hope,
+even to those who had trod in the beaten paths of business, that an
+artist with so much prestige might secure a commission to perpetuate
+upon canvas the lineaments of the president, and secure a share of the
+_pesos_ that were raining upon the caterers to his weaknesses.
+
+Keogh had set his price at ten thousand dollars. Artists had been paid
+more for portraits. He and White were to share the expenses of the
+trip, and divide the possible profits. Thus he laid the scheme before
+White, whom he had known in the West before one declared for Art and
+the other became a Bedouin.
+
+Before long the two machinators abandoned the rigour of the bare studio
+for a snug corner of a café. There they sat far into the night, with
+old envelopes and Keogh’s stub of blue pencil between them.
+
+At twelve o’clock White doubled up in his chair, with his chin on his
+fist, and shut his eyes at the unbeautiful wall-paper.
+
+“I’ll go you, Billy,” he said, in the quiet tones of decision. “I’ve
+got two or three hundred saved up for sausages and rent; and I’ll take
+the chance with you. Five thousand! It will give me two years in Paris
+and one in Italy. I’ll begin to pack to-morrow.”
+
+“You’ll begin in ten minutes,” said Keogh. “It’s to-morrow now. The
+_Karlsefin_ starts back at four P.M. Come on to your painting shop, and
+I’ll help you.”
+
+For five months in the year Coralio is the Newport of Anchuria. Then
+only does the town possess life. From November to March it is
+practically the seat of government. The president with his official
+family sojourns there; and society follows him. The pleasure-loving
+people make the season one long holiday of amusement and rejoicing.
+_Fiestas_, balls, games, sea bathing, processions and small theatres
+contribute to their enjoyment. The famous Swiss band from the capital
+plays in the little plaza every evening, while the fourteen carriages
+and vehicles in the town circle in funereal but complacent procession.
+Indians from the interior mountains, looking like prehistoric stone
+idols, come down to peddle their handiwork in the streets. The people
+throng the narrow ways, a chattering, happy, careless stream of buoyant
+humanity. Preposterous children rigged out with the shortest of ballet
+skirts and gilt wings, howl, underfoot, among the effervescent crowds.
+Especially is the arrival of the presidential party, at the opening of
+the season, attended with pomp, show and patriotic demonstrations of
+enthusiasm and delight.
+
+When Keogh and White reached their destination, on the return trip of
+the _Karlsefin_, the gay winter season was well begun. As they stepped
+upon the beach they could hear the band playing in the plaza. The
+village maidens, with fireflies already fixed in their dark locks, were
+gliding, barefoot and coy-eyed, along the paths. Dandies in white
+linen, swinging their canes, were beginning their seductive strolls.
+The air was full of human essence, of artificial enticement, of
+coquetry, indolence, pleasure—the man-made sense of existence.
+
+The first two or three days after their arrival were spent in
+preliminaries. Keogh escorted the artist about town, introducing him to
+the little circle of English-speaking residents and pulling whatever
+wires he could to effect the spreading of White’s fame as a painter.
+And then Keogh planned a more spectacular demonstration of the idea he
+wished to keep before the public.
+
+He and White engaged rooms in the Hotel de los Estranjeros. The two
+were clad in new suits of immaculate duck, with American straw hats,
+and carried canes of remarkable uniqueness and inutility. Few
+caballeros in Coralio—even the gorgeously uniformed officers of the
+Anchurian army—were as conspicuous for ease and elegance of demeanour
+as Keogh and his friend, the great American painter, Señor White.
+
+White set up his easel on the beach and made striking sketches of the
+mountain and sea views. The native population formed at his rear in a
+vast, chattering semicircle to watch his work. Keogh, with his care for
+details, had arranged for himself a pose which he carried out with
+fidelity. His rôle was that of friend to the great artist, a man of
+affairs and leisure. The visible emblem of his position was a pocket
+camera.
+
+“For branding the man who owns it,” said he, “a genteel dilettante with
+a bank account and an easy conscience, a steam-yacht ain’t in it with a
+camera. You see a man doing nothing but loafing around making
+snap-shots, and you know right away he reads up well in ‘Bradstreet.’
+You notice these old millionaire boys—soon as they get through taking
+everything else in sight they go to taking photographs. People are more
+impressed by a kodak than they are by a title or a four-carat
+scarf-pin.” So Keogh strolled blandly about Coralio, snapping the
+scenery and the shrinking señoritas, while White posed conspicuously in
+the higher regions of art.
+
+Two weeks after their arrival, the scheme began to bear fruit. An
+aide-de-camp of the president drove to the hotel in a dashing victoria.
+The president desired that Señor White come to the Casa Morena for an
+informal interview.
+
+Keogh gripped his pipe tightly between his teeth. “Not a cent less than
+ten thousand,” he said to the artist—“remember the price. And in gold
+or its equivalent—don’t let him stick you with this bargain-counter
+stuff they call money here.”
+
+“Perhaps it isn’t that he wants,” said White.
+
+“Get out!” said Keogh, with splendid confidence. “I know what he wants.
+He wants his picture painted by the celebrated young American painter
+and filibuster now sojourning in his down-trodden country. Off you go.”
+
+The victoria sped away with the artist. Keogh walked up and down,
+puffing great clouds of smoke from his pipe, and waited. In an hour the
+victoria swept again to the door of the hotel, deposited White, and
+vanished. The artist dashed up the stairs, three at a step. Keogh
+stopped smoking, and became a silent interrogation point.
+
+“Landed,” exclaimed White, with his boyish face flushed with elation.
+“Billy, you are a wonder. He wants a picture. I’ll tell you all about
+it. By Heavens! that dictator chap is a corker! He’s a dictator clear
+down to his finger-ends. He’s a kind of combination of Julius Cæsar,
+Lucifer and Chauncey Depew done in sepia. Polite and grim—that’s his
+way. The room I saw him in was about ten acres big, and looked like a
+Mississippi steamboat with its gilding and mirrors and white paint. He
+talks English better than I can ever hope to. The matter of the price
+came up. I mentioned ten thousand. I expected him to call the guard and
+have me taken out and shot. He didn’t move an eyelash. He just waved
+one of his chestnut hands in a careless way, and said, ‘Whatever you
+say.’ I am to go back to-morrow and discuss with him the details of the
+picture.”
+
+Keogh hung his head. Self-abasement was easy to read in his downcast
+countenance.
+
+“I’m failing, Carry,” he said, sorrowfully. “I’m not fit to handle
+these man’s-size schemes any longer. Peddling oranges in a push-cart is
+about the suitable graft for me. When I said ten thousand, I swear I
+thought I had sized up that brown man’s limit to within two cents. He’d
+have melted down for fifteen thousand just as easy. Say—Carry—you’ll
+see old man Keogh safe in some nice, quiet idiot asylum, won’t you, if
+he makes a break like that again?”
+
+The Casa Morena, although only one story in height, was a building of
+brown stone, luxurious as a palace in its interior. It stood on a low
+hill in a walled garden of splendid tropical flora at the upper edge of
+Coralio. The next day the president’s carriage came again for the
+artist. Keogh went out for a walk along the beach, where he and his
+“picture box” were now familiar sights. When he returned to the hotel
+White was sitting in a steamer-chair on the balcony.
+
+“Well,” said Keogh, “did you and His Nibs decide on the kind of a
+chromo he wants?”
+
+White got up and walked back and forth on the balcony a few times. Then
+he stopped, and laughed strangely. His face was flushed, and his eyes
+were bright with a kind of angry amusement.
+
+“Look here, Billy,” he said, somewhat roughly, “when you first came to
+me in my studio and mentioned a picture, I thought you wanted a Smashed
+Oats or a Hair Tonic poster painted on a range of mountains or the side
+of a continent. Well, either of those jobs would have been Art in its
+highest form compared to the one you’ve steered me against. I can’t
+paint that picture, Billy. You’ve got to let me out. Let me try to tell
+you what that barbarian wants. He had it all planned out and even a
+sketch made of his idea. The old boy doesn’t draw badly at all. But, ye
+goddesses of Art! listen to the monstrosity he expects me to paint. He
+wants himself in the centre of the canvas, of course. He is to be
+painted as Jupiter sitting on Olympus, with the clouds at his feet. At
+one side of him stands George Washington, in full regimentals, with his
+hand on the president’s shoulder. An angel with outstretched wings
+hovers overhead, and is placing a laurel wreath on the president’s
+head, crowning him—Queen of the May, I suppose. In the background is to
+be cannon, more angels and soldiers. The man who would paint that
+picture would have to have the soul of a dog, and would deserve to go
+down into oblivion without even a tin can tied to his tail to sound his
+memory.”
+
+Little beads of moisture crept out all over Billy Keogh’s brow. The
+stub of his blue pencil had not figured out a contingency like this.
+The machinery of his plan had run with flattering smoothness until now.
+He dragged another chair upon the balcony, and got White back to his
+seat. He lit his pipe with apparent calm.
+
+“Now, sonny,” he said, with gentle grimness, “you and me will have an
+Art to Art talk. You’ve got your art and I’ve got mine. Yours is the
+real Pierian stuff that turns up its nose at bock-beer signs and
+oleographs of the Old Mill. Mine’s the art of Business. This was my
+scheme, and it worked out like two-and-two. Paint that president man as
+Old King Cole, or Venus, or a landscape, or a fresco, or a bunch of
+lilies, or anything he thinks he looks like. But get the paint on the
+canvas and collect the spoils. You wouldn’t throw me down, Carry, at
+this stage of the game. Think of that ten thousand.”
+
+“I can’t help thinking of it,” said White, “and that’s what hurts. I’m
+tempted to throw every ideal I ever had down in the mire, and steep my
+soul in infamy by painting that picture. That five thousand meant three
+years of foreign study to me, and I’d almost sell my soul for that.”
+
+“Now it ain’t as bad as that,” said Keogh, soothingly. “It’s a business
+proposition. It’s so much paint and time against money. I don’t fall in
+with your idea that that picture would so everlastingly jolt the art
+side of the question. George Washington was all right, you know, and
+nobody could say a word against the angel. I don’t think so bad of that
+group. If you was to give Jupiter a pair of epaulets and a sword, and
+kind of work the clouds around to look like a blackberry patch, it
+wouldn’t make such a bad battle scene. Why, if we hadn’t already
+settled on the price, he ought to pay an extra thousand for Washington,
+and the angel ought to raise it five hundred.”
+
+“You don’t understand, Billy,” said White, with an uneasy laugh. “Some
+of us fellows who try to paint have big notions about Art. I wanted to
+paint a picture some day that people would stand before and forget that
+it was made of paint. I wanted it to creep into them like a bar of
+music and mushroom there like a soft bullet. And I wanted ’em to go
+away and ask, ‘What else has he done?’ And I didn’t want ’em to find a
+thing; not a portrait nor a magazine cover nor an illustration nor a
+drawing of a girl—nothing but _the_ picture. That’s why I’ve lived on
+fried sausages, and tried to keep true to myself. I persuaded myself to
+do this portrait for the chance it might give me to study abroad. But
+this howling, screaming caricature! Good Lord! can’t you see how it
+is?”
+
+“Sure,” said Keogh, as tenderly as he would have spoken to a child, and
+he laid a long forefinger on White’s knee. “I see. It’s bad to have
+your art all slugged up like that. I know. You wanted to paint a big
+thing like the panorama of the battle of Gettysburg. But let me
+kalsomine you a little mental sketch to consider. Up to date we’re out
+$385.50 on this scheme. Our capital took every cent both of us could
+raise. We’ve got about enough left to get back to New York on. I need
+my share of that ten thousand. I want to work a copper deal in Idaho,
+and make a hundred thousand. That’s the business end of the thing. Come
+down off your art perch, Carry, and let’s land that hatful of dollars.”
+
+“Billy,” said White, with an effort, “I’ll try. I won’t say I’ll do it,
+but I’ll try. I’ll go at it, and put it through if I can.”
+
+“That’s business,” said Keogh heartily. “Good boy! Now, here’s another
+thing—rush that picture—crowd it through as quick as you can. Get a
+couple of boys to help you mix the paint if necessary. I’ve picked up
+some pointers around town. The people here are beginning to get sick of
+Mr. President. They say he’s been too free with concessions; and they
+accuse him of trying to make a dicker with England to sell out the
+country. We want that picture done and paid for before there’s any
+row.”
+
+In the great _patio_ of Casa Morena, the president caused to be
+stretched a huge canvas. Under this White set up his temporary studio.
+For two hours each day the great man sat to him.
+
+White worked faithfully. But, as the work progressed, he had seasons of
+bitter scorn, of infinite self-contempt, of sullen gloom and sardonic
+gaiety. Keogh, with the patience of a great general, soothed, coaxed,
+argued—kept him at the picture.
+
+At the end of a month White announced that the picture was
+completed—Jupiter, Washington, angels, clouds, cannon and all. His face
+was pale and his mouth drawn straight when he told Keogh. He said the
+president was much pleased with it. It was to be hung in the National
+Gallery of Statesmen and Heroes. The artist had been requested to
+return to Casa Morena on the following day to receive payment. At the
+appointed time he left the hotel, silent under his friend’s joyful talk
+of their success.
+
+An hour later he walked into the room where Keogh was waiting, threw
+his hat on the floor, and sat upon the table.
+
+“Billy,” he said, in strained and labouring tones, “I’ve a little money
+out West in a small business that my brother is running. It’s what I’ve
+been living on while I’ve been studying art. I’ll draw out my share and
+pay you back what you’ve lost on this scheme.”
+
+“Lost!” exclaimed Keogh, jumping up. “Didn’t you get paid for the
+picture?”
+
+“Yes, I got paid,” said White. “But just now there isn’t any picture,
+and there isn’t any pay. If you care to hear about it, here are the
+edifying details. The president and I were looking at the painting. His
+secretary brought a bank draft on New York for ten thousand dollars and
+handed it to me. The moment I touched it I went wild. I tore it into
+little pieces and threw them on the floor. A workman was repainting the
+pillars inside the _patio_. A bucket of his paint happened to be
+convenient. I picked up his brush and slapped a quart of blue paint all
+over that ten-thousand-dollar nightmare. I bowed, and walked out. The
+president didn’t move or speak. That was one time he was taken by
+surprise. It’s tough on you, Billy, but I couldn’t help it.”
+
+There seemed to be excitement in Coralio. Outside there was a confused,
+rising murmur pierced by high-pitched cries. “_Bajo el traidor—Muerte
+el traidor!_” were the words they seemed to form.
+
+“Listen to that!” exclaimed White, bitterly: “I know that much Spanish.
+They’re shouting, ‘Down with the traitor!’ I heard them before. I felt
+that they meant me. I was a traitor to Art. The picture had to go.”
+
+“‘Down with the blank fool’ would have suited your case better,” said
+Keogh, with fiery emphasis. “You tear up ten thousand dollars like an
+old rag because the way you’ve spread on five dollars’ worth of paint
+hurts your conscience. Next time I pick a side-partner in a scheme the
+man has got to go before a notary and swear he never even heard the
+word ‘ideal’ mentioned.”
+
+Keogh strode from the room, white-hot. White paid little attention to
+his resentment. The scorn of Billy Keogh seemed a trifling thing beside
+the greater self-scorn he had escaped.
+
+In Coralio the excitement waxed. An outburst was imminent. The cause of
+this demonstration of displeasure was the presence in the town of a
+big, pink-cheeked Englishman, who, it was said, was an agent of his
+government come to clinch the bargain by which the president placed his
+people in the hands of a foreign power. It was charged that not only
+had he given away priceless concessions, but that the public debt was
+to be transferred into the hands of the English, and the custom-houses
+turned over to them as a guarantee. The long-enduring people had
+determined to make their protest felt.
+
+On that night, in Coralio and in other towns, their ire found vent.
+Yelling mobs, mercurial but dangerous, roamed the streets. They
+overthrew the great bronze statue of the president that stood in the
+centre of the plaza, and hacked it to shapeless pieces. They tore from
+public buildings the tablets set there proclaiming the glory of the
+“Illustrious Liberator.” His pictures in the government offices were
+demolished. The mobs even attacked the Casa Morena, but were driven
+away by the military, which remained faithful to the executive. All the
+night terror reigned.
+
+The greatness of Losada was shown by the fact that by noon the next day
+order was restored, and he was still absolute. He issued proclamations
+denying positively that any negotiations of any kind had been entered
+into with England. Sir Stafford Vaughn, the pink-cheeked Englishman,
+also declared in placards and in public print that his presence there
+had no international significance. He was a traveller without guile. In
+fact (so he stated), he had not even spoken with the president or been
+in his presence since his arrival.
+
+During this disturbance, White was preparing for his homeward voyage in
+the steamship that was to sail within two or three days. About noon,
+Keogh, the restless, took his camera out with the hope of speeding the
+lagging hours. The town was now as quiet as if peace had never departed
+from her perch on the red-tiled roofs.
+
+About the middle of the afternoon, Keogh hurried back to the hotel with
+something decidedly special in his air. He retired to the little room
+where he developed his pictures.
+
+Later on he came out to White on the balcony, with a luminous, grim,
+predatory smile on his face.
+
+“Do you know what that is?” he asked, holding up a 4 × 5 photograph
+mounted on cardboard.
+
+“Snap-shot of a señorita sitting in the sand—alliteration
+unintentional,” guessed White, lazily.
+
+“Wrong,” said Keogh with shining eyes. “It’s a slung-shot. It’s a can
+of dynamite. It’s a gold mine. It’s a sight-draft on your president man
+for twenty thousand dollars—yes, sir—twenty thousand this time, and no
+spoiling the picture. No ethics of art in the way. Art! You with your
+smelly little tubes! I’ve got you skinned to death with a kodak. Take a
+look at that.”
+
+White took the picture in his hand, and gave a long whistle.
+
+“Jove!” he exclaimed, “but wouldn’t that stir up a row in town if you
+let it be seen. How in the world did you get it, Billy?”
+
+“You know that high wall around the president man’s back garden? I was
+up there trying to get a bird’s-eye of the town. I happened to notice a
+chink in the wall where a stone and a lot of plaster had slid out.
+Thinks I, I’ll take a peep through to see how Mr. President’s cabbages
+are growing. The first thing I saw was him and this Sir Englishman
+sitting at a little table about twenty feet away. They had the table
+all spread over with documents, and they were hobnobbing over them as
+thick as two pirates. ’Twas a nice corner of the garden, all private
+and shady with palms and orange trees, and they had a pail of champagne
+set by handy in the grass. I knew then was the time for me to make my
+big hit in Art. So I raised the machine up to the crack, and pressed
+the button. Just as I did so them old boys shook hands on the deal—you
+see they took that way in the picture.”
+
+Keogh put on his coat and hat.
+
+“What are you going to do with it?” asked White.
+
+“Me,” said Keogh in a hurt tone, “why, I’m going to tie a pink ribbon
+to it and hang it on the what-not, of course. I’m surprised at you. But
+while I’m out you just try to figure out what ginger-cake potentate
+would be most likely to want to buy this work of art for his private
+collection—just to keep it out of circulation.”
+
+The sunset was reddening the tops of the cocoanut palms when Billy
+Keogh came back from Casa Morena. He nodded to the artist’s questioning
+gaze; and lay down on a cot with his hands under the back of his head.
+
+“I saw him. He paid the money like a little man. They didn’t want to
+let me in at first. I told ’em it was important. Yes, that president
+man is on the plenty-able list. He’s got a beautiful business system
+about the way he uses his brains. All I had to do was to hold up the
+photograph so he could see it, and name the price. He just smiled, and
+walked over to a safe and got the cash. Twenty one-thousand-dollar
+brand-new United States Treasury notes he laid on the table, like I’d
+pay out a dollar and a quarter. Fine notes, too—they crackled with a
+sound like burning the brush off a ten-acre lot.”
+
+“Let’s try the feel of one,” said White, curiously. “I never saw a
+thousand-dollar bill.” Keogh did not immediately respond.
+
+“Carry,” he said, in an absent-minded way, “you think a heap of your
+art, don’t you?”
+
+“More,” said White, frankly, “than has been for the financial good of
+myself and my friends.”
+
+“I thought you were a fool the other day,” went on Keogh, quietly, “and
+I’m not sure now that you wasn’t. But if you was, so am I. I’ve been in
+some funny deals, Carry, but I’ve always managed to scramble fair, and
+match my brains and capital against the other fellow’s. But when it
+comes to—well, when you’ve got the other fellow cinched, and the screws
+on him, and he’s got to put up—why, it don’t strike me as being a man’s
+game. They’ve got a name for it, you know; it’s—confound you, don’t you
+understand? A fellow feels—it’s something like that blamed art of
+yours—he—well, I tore that photograph up and laid the pieces on that
+stack of money and shoved the whole business back across the table.
+‘Excuse me, Mr. Losada,’ I said, ‘but I guess I’ve made a mistake in
+the price. You get the photo for nothing.’ Now, Carry, you get out the
+pencil, and we’ll do some more figuring. I’d like to save enough out of
+our capital for you to have some fried sausages in your joint when you
+get back to New York.”
+
+
+
+
+XV
+DICKY
+
+
+There is little consecutiveness along the Spanish Main. Things happen
+there intermittently. Even Time seems to hang his scythe daily on the
+branch of an orange tree while he takes a siesta and a cigarette.
+
+After the ineffectual revolt against the administration of President
+Losada, the country settled again into quiet toleration of the abuses
+with which he had been charged. In Coralio old political enemies went
+arm-in-arm, lightly eschewing for the time all differences of opinion.
+
+The failure of the art expedition did not stretch the cat-footed Keogh
+upon his back. The ups and downs of Fortune made smooth travelling for
+his nimble steps. His blue pencil stub was at work again before the
+smoke of the steamer on which White sailed had cleared away from the
+horizon. He had but to speak a word to Geddie to find his credit
+negotiable for whatever goods he wanted from the store of Brannigan &
+Company. On the same day on which White arrived in New York Keogh, at
+the rear of a train of five pack mules loaded with hardware and
+cutlery, set his face toward the grim, interior mountains. There the
+Indian tribes wash gold dust from the auriferous streams; and when a
+market is brought to them trading is brisk and _muy bueno_ in the
+Cordilleras.
+
+In Coralio Time folded his wings and paced wearily along his drowsy
+path. They who had most cheered the torpid hours were gone. Clancy had
+sailed on a Spanish barque for Colon, contemplating a cut across the
+isthmus and then a further voyage to end at Calao, where the fighting
+was said to be on. Geddie, whose quiet and genial nature had once
+served to mitigate the frequent dull reaction of lotus eating, was now
+a home-man, happy with his bright orchid, Paula, and never even
+dreaming of or regretting the unsolved, sealed and monogramed Bottle
+whose contents, now inconsiderable, were held safely in the keeping of
+the sea.
+
+Well may the Walrus, most discerning and eclectic of beasts, place
+sealing-wax midway on his programme of topics that fall pertinent and
+diverting upon the ear.
+
+Atwood was gone—he of the hospitable back porch and ingenuous cunning.
+Dr. Gregg, with his trepanning story smouldering within him, was a
+whiskered volcano, always showing signs of imminent eruption, and was
+not to be considered in the ranks of those who might contribute to the
+amelioration of ennui. The new consul’s note chimed with the sad sea
+waves and the violent tropical greens—he had not a bar of Scheherezade
+or of the Round Table in his lute. Goodwin was employed with large
+projects: what time he was loosed from them found him at his home,
+where he loved to be. Therefore it will be seen that there was a dearth
+of fellowship and entertainment among the foreign contingent of
+Coralio.
+
+And then Dicky Maloney dropped down from the clouds upon the town, and
+amused it.
+
+Nobody knew where Dicky Maloney hailed from or how he reached Coralio.
+He appeared there one day; and that was all. He afterward said that he
+came on the fruit steamer _Thor_; but an inspection of the _Thor’s_
+passenger list of that date was found to be Maloneyless. Curiosity,
+however, soon perished; and Dicky took his place among the odd fish
+cast up by the Caribbean.
+
+He was an active, devil-may-care, rollicking fellow with an engaging
+gray eye, the most irresistible grin, a rather dark or much sunburned
+complexion, and a head of the fieriest red hair ever seen in that
+country. Speaking the Spanish language as well as he spoke English, and
+seeming always to have plenty of silver in his pockets, it was not long
+before he was a welcome companion whithersoever he went. He had an
+extreme fondness for _vino blanco_, and gained the reputation of being
+able to drink more of it than any three men in town. Everybody called
+him “Dicky”; everybody cheered up at the sight of him—especially the
+natives, to whom his marvellous red hair and his free-and-easy style
+were a constant delight and envy. Wherever you went in the town you
+would soon see Dicky or hear his genial laugh, and find around him a
+group of admirers who appreciated him both for his good nature and the
+white wine he was always so ready to buy.
+
+A considerable amount of speculation was had concerning the object of
+his sojourn there, until one day he silenced this by opening a small
+shop for the sale of tobacco, _dulces_ and the handiwork of the
+interior Indians—fibre-and-silk-woven goods, deerskin _zapatos_ and
+basketwork of _tule_ reeds. Even then he did not change his habits; for
+he was drinking and playing cards half the day and night with the
+_comandante_, the collector of customs, the _Jefe Politico_ and other
+gay dogs among the native officials.
+
+One day Dicky saw Pasa, the daughter of Madama Ortiz, sitting in the
+side-door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros. He stopped in his tracks,
+still, for the first time in Coralio; and then he sped, swift as a
+deer, to find Vasquez, a gilded native youth, to present him.
+
+The young men had named Pasa “_La Santita Naranjadita_.” _Naranjadita_
+is a Spanish word for a certain colour that you must go to more trouble
+to describe in English. By saying “The little saint, tinted the most
+beautiful-delicate-slightly-orange-golden,” you will approximate the
+description of Madama Ortiz’s daughter.
+
+La Madama Ortiz sold rum in addition to other liquors. Now, you must
+know that the rum expiates whatever opprobrium attends upon the other
+commodities. For rum-making, mind you, is a government monopoly; and to
+keep a government dispensary assures respectability if not preëminence.
+Moreover, the saddest of precisians could find no fault with the
+conduct of the shop. Customers drank there in the lowest of spirits and
+fearsomely, as in the shadow of the dead; for Madama’s ancient and
+vaunted lineage counteracted even the rum’s behest to be merry. For,
+was she not of the Iglesias, who landed with Pizarro? And had not her
+deceased husband been _comisionado de caminos y puentes_ for the
+district?
+
+In the evenings Pasa sat by the window in the room next to the one
+where they drank, and strummed dreamily upon her guitar. And then, by
+twos and threes, would come visiting young caballeros and occupy the
+prim line of chairs set against the wall of this room. They were there
+to besiege the heart of “_La Santita_.” Their method (which is not
+proof against intelligent competition) consisted of expanding the
+chest, looking valorous, and consuming a gross or two of cigarettes.
+Even saints delicately oranged prefer to be wooed differently.
+
+Doña Pasa would tide over the vast chasms of nicotinized silence with
+music from her guitar, while she wondered if the romances she had read
+about gallant and more—more contiguous cavaliers were all lies. At
+somewhat regular intervals Madama would glide in from the dispensary
+with a sort of drought-suggesting gleam in her eye, and there would be
+a rustling of stiffly-starched white trousers as one of the caballeros
+would propose an adjournment to the bar.
+
+That Dicky Maloney would, sooner or later, explore this field was a
+thing to be foreseen. There were few doors in Coralio into which his
+red head had not been poked.
+
+In an incredibly short space of time after his first sight of her he
+was there, seated close beside her rocking chair. There were no
+back-against-the-wall poses in Dicky’s theory of wooing. His plan of
+subjection was an attack at close range. To carry the fortress with one
+concentrated, ardent, eloquent, irresistible _escalade_—that was
+Dicky’s way.
+
+Pasa was descended from the proudest Spanish families in the country.
+Moreover, she had had unusual advantages. Two years in a New Orleans
+school had elevated her ambitions and fitted her for a fate above the
+ordinary maidens of her native land. And yet here she succumbed to the
+first red-haired scamp with a glib tongue and a charming smile that
+came along and courted her properly.
+
+Very soon Dicky took her to the little church on the corner of the
+plaza, and “Mrs. Maloney” was added to her string of distinguished
+names.
+
+And it was her fate to sit, with her patient, saintly eyes and figure
+like a bisque Psyche, behind the sequestered counter of the little
+shop, while Dicky drank and philandered with his frivolous
+acquaintances.
+
+The women, with their naturally fine instinct, saw a chance for
+vivisection, and delicately taunted her with his habits. She turned
+upon them in a beautiful, steady blaze of sorrowful contempt.
+
+“You meat-cows,” she said, in her level, crystal-clear tones; “you know
+nothing of a man. Your men are _maromeros_. They are fit only to roll
+cigarettes in the shade until the sun strikes and shrivels them up.
+They drone in your hammocks and you comb their hair and feed them with
+fresh fruit. My man is of no such blood. Let him drink of the wine.
+When he has taken sufficient of it to drown one of your _flaccitos_ he
+will come home to me more of a man than one thousand of your
+_pobrecitos_. _My_ hair he smooths and braids; to me he sings; he
+himself removes my _zapatos_, and there, there, upon each instep leaves
+a kiss. He holds— Oh, you will never understand! Blind ones who have
+never known a _man_.”
+
+Sometimes mysterious things happened at night about Dicky’s shop. While
+the front of it was dark, in the little room back of it Dicky and a few
+of his friends would sit about a table carrying on some kind of very
+quiet _negocios_ until quite late. Finally he would let them out the
+front door very carefully, and go upstairs to his little saint. These
+visitors were generally conspirator-like men with dark clothes and
+hats. Of course, these dark doings were noticed after a while, and
+talked about.
+
+Dicky seemed to care nothing at all for the society of the alien
+residents of the town. He avoided Goodwin, and his skilful escape from
+the trepanning story of Dr. Gregg is still referred to, in Coralio, as
+a masterpiece of lightning diplomacy.
+
+Many letters arrived, addressed to “Mr. Dicky Maloney,” or “Señor
+Dickee Maloney,” to the considerable pride of Pasa. That so many people
+should desire to write to him only confirmed her own suspicion that the
+light from his red head shone around the world. As to their contents
+she never felt curiosity. There was a wife for you!
+
+The one mistake Dicky made in Coralio was to run out of money at the
+wrong time. Where his money came from was a puzzle, for the sales of
+his shop were next to nothing, but that source failed, and at a
+peculiarly unfortunate time. It was when the _comandante_, Don Señor el
+Coronel Encarnación Rios, looked upon the little saint seated in the
+shop and felt his heart go pitapat.
+
+The _comandante_, who was versed in all the intricate arts of
+gallantry, first delicately hinted at his sentiments by donning his
+dress uniform and strutting up and down fiercely before her window.
+Pasa, glancing demurely with her saintly eyes, instantly perceived his
+resemblance to her parrot, Chichi, and was diverted to the extent of a
+smile. The _comandante_ saw the smile, which was not intended for him.
+Convinced of an impression made, he entered the shop, confidently, and
+advanced to open compliment. Pasa froze; he pranced; she flamed
+royally; he was charmed to injudicious persistence; she commanded him
+to leave the shop; he tried to capture her hand,—and Dicky entered,
+smiling broadly, full of white wine and the devil.
+
+He spent five minutes in punishing the _comandante_ scientifically and
+carefully, so that the pain might be prolonged as far as possible. At
+the end of that time he pitched the rash wooer out the door upon the
+stones of the street, senseless.
+
+A barefooted policeman who had been watching the affair from across the
+street blew a whistle. A squad of four soldiers came running from the
+_cuartel_ around the corner. When they saw that the offender was Dicky,
+they stopped, and blew more whistles, which brought out reënforcements
+of eight. Deeming the odds against them sufficiently reduced, the
+military advanced upon the disturber.
+
+Dicky, being thoroughly imbued with the martial spirit, stooped and
+drew the _comandante’s_ sword, which was girded about him, and charged
+his foe. He chased the standing army four squares, playfully prodding
+its squealing rear and hacking at its ginger-coloured heels.
+
+But he was not so successful with the civic authorities. Six muscular,
+nimble policemen overpowered him and conveyed him, triumphantly but
+warily, to jail. “_El Diablo Colorado_” they dubbed him, and derided
+the military for its defeat.
+
+Dicky, with the rest of the prisoners, could look out through the
+barred door at the grass of the little plaza, at a row of orange trees
+and the red tile roofs and ’dobe walls of a line of insignificant
+stores.
+
+At sunset along a path across this plaza came a melancholy procession
+of sad-faced women bearing plantains, cassaba, bread and fruit—each
+coming with food to some wretch behind those bars to whom she still
+clung and furnished the means of life. Twice a day—morning and
+evening—they were permitted to come. Water was furnished to her
+compulsory guests by the republic, but no food.
+
+That evening Dicky’s name was called by the sentry, and he stepped
+before the bars of the door. There stood his little saint, a black
+mantilla draped about her head and shoulders, her face like glorified
+melancholy, her clear eyes gazing longingly at him as if they might
+draw him between the bars to her. She brought a chicken, some oranges,
+_dulces_ and a loaf of white bread. A soldier inspected the food, and
+passed it in to Dicky. Pasa spoke calmly, as she always did, briefly,
+in her thrilling, flute-like tones. “Angel of my life,” she said, “let
+it not be long that thou art away from me. Thou knowest that life is
+not a thing to be endured with thou not at my side. Tell me if I can do
+aught in this matter. If not, I will wait—a little while. I come again
+in the morning.”
+
+Dicky, with his shoes removed so as not to disturb his fellow
+prisoners, tramped the floor of the jail half the night condemning his
+lack of money and the cause of it—whatever that might have been. He
+knew very well that money would have bought his release at once.
+
+For two days succeeding Pasa came at the appointed times and brought
+him food. He eagerly inquired each time if a letter or package had come
+for him, and she mournfully shook her head.
+
+On the morning of the third day she brought only a small loaf of bread.
+There were dark circles under her eyes. She seemed as calm as ever.
+
+“By jingo,” said Dicky, who seemed to speak in English or Spanish as
+the whim seized him, “this is dry provender, _muchachita_. Is this the
+best you can dig up for a fellow?”
+
+Pasa looked at him as a mother looks at a beloved but capricious babe.
+
+“Think better of it,” she said, in a low voice; “since for the next
+meal there will be nothing. The last _centavo_ is spent.” She pressed
+closer against the grating.
+
+“Sell the goods in the shop—take anything for them.”
+
+“Have I not tried? Did I not offer them for one-tenth their cost? Not
+even one _peso_ would any one give. There is not one _real_ in this
+town to assist Dickee Malonee.”
+
+Dick clenched his teeth grimly. “That’s the _comandante_,” he growled.
+“He’s responsible for that sentiment. Wait, oh, wait till the cards are
+all out.”
+
+Pasa lowered her voice to almost a whisper. “And, listen, heart of my
+heart,” she said, “I have endeavoured to be brave, but I cannot live
+without thee. Three days now—”
+
+Dicky caught a faint gleam of steel from the folds of her mantilla. For
+once she looked in his face and saw it without a smile, stern, menacing
+and purposeful. Then he suddenly raised his hand and his smile came
+back like a gleam of sunshine. The hoarse signal of an incoming
+steamer’s siren sounded in the harbour. Dicky called to the sentry who
+was pacing before the door: “What steamer comes?”
+
+“The _Catarina_.”
+
+“Of the Vesuvius line?”
+
+“Without doubt, of that line.”
+
+“Go you, _picarilla_,” said Dicky joyously to Pasa, “to the American
+consul. Tell him I wish to speak with him. See that he comes at once.
+And look you! let me see a different look in those eyes, for I promise
+your head shall rest upon this arm to-night.”
+
+It was an hour before the consul came. He held his green umbrella under
+his arm, and mopped his forehead impatiently.
+
+“Now, see here, Maloney,” he began, captiously, “you fellows seem to
+think you can cut up any kind of row, and expect me to pull you out of
+it. I’m neither the War Department nor a gold mine. This country has
+its laws, you know, and there’s one against pounding the senses out of
+the regular army. You Irish are forever getting into trouble. I don’t
+see what I can do. Anything like tobacco, now, to make you
+comfortable—or newspapers—”
+
+“Son of Eli,” interrupted Dicky, gravely, “you haven’t changed an iota.
+That is almost a duplicate of the speech you made when old Koen’s
+donkeys and geese got into the chapel loft, and the culprits wanted to
+hide in your room.”
+
+“Oh, heavens!” exclaimed the consul, hurriedly adjusting his
+spectacles. “Are you a Yale man, too? Were you in that crowd? I don’t
+seem to remember any one with red—any one named Maloney. Such a lot of
+college men seem to have misused their advantages. One of the best
+mathematicians of the class of ’91 is selling lottery tickets in
+Belize. A Cornell man dropped off here last month. He was second
+steward on a guano boat. I’ll write to the department if you like,
+Maloney. Or if there’s any tobacco, or newspa—”
+
+“There’s nothing,” interrupted Dicky, shortly, “but this. You go tell
+the captain of the _Catarina_ that Dicky Maloney wants to see him as
+soon as he can conveniently come. Tell him where I am. Hurry. That’s
+all.”
+
+The consul, glad to be let off so easily, hurried away. The captain of
+the _Catarina_, a stout man, Sicilian born, soon appeared, shoving,
+with little ceremony, through the guards to the jail door. The Vesuvius
+Fruit Company had a habit of doing things that way in Anchuria.
+
+“I am exceedingly sorry—exceedingly sorry,” said the captain, “to see
+this occur. I place myself at your service, Mr. Maloney. What you need
+shall be furnished. Whatever you say shall be done.”
+
+Dicky looked at him unsmilingly. His red hair could not detract from
+his attitude of severe dignity as he stood, tall and calm, with his now
+grim mouth forming a horizontal line.
+
+“Captain De Lucco, I believe I still have funds in the hands of your
+company—ample and personal funds. I ordered a remittance last week. The
+money has not arrived. You know what is needed in this game. Money and
+money and more money. Why has it not been sent?”
+
+“By the _Cristobal_,” replied De Lucco, gesticulating, “it was
+despatched. Where is the _Cristobal_? Off Cape Antonio I spoke her with
+a broken shaft. A tramp coaster was towing her back to New Orleans. I
+brought money ashore thinking your need for it might not withstand
+delay. In this envelope is one thousand dollars. There is more if you
+need it, Mr. Maloney.”
+
+“For the present it will suffice,” said Dicky, softening as he crinkled
+the envelope and looked down at the half-inch thickness of smooth,
+dingy bills.
+
+“The long green!” he said, gently, with a new reverence in his gaze.
+“Is there anything it will not buy, Captain?”
+
+“I had three friends,” replied De Lucco, who was a bit of a
+philosopher, “who had money. One of them speculated in stocks and made
+ten million; another is in heaven, and the third married a poor girl
+whom he loved.”
+
+“The answer, then,” said Dicky, “is held by the Almighty, Wall Street
+and Cupid. So, the question remains.”
+
+“This,” queried the captain, including Dicky’s surroundings in a
+significant gesture of his hand, “is it—it is not—it is not connected
+with the business of your little shop? There is no failure in your
+plans?”
+
+“No, no,” said Dicky. “This is merely the result of a little private
+affair of mine, a digression from the regular line of business. They
+say for a complete life a man must know poverty, love and war. But they
+don’t go well together, _capitán mio_. No; there is no failure in my
+business. The little shop is doing very well.”
+
+When the captain had departed Dicky called the sergeant of the jail
+squad and asked:
+
+“Am I _preso_ by the military or by the civil authority?”
+
+“Surely there is no martial law in effect now, señor.”
+
+“_Bueno_. Now go or send to the alcalde, the _Jues de la Paz_ and the
+_Jefe de los Policios_. Tell them I am prepared at once to satisfy the
+demands of justice.” A folded bill of the “long green” slid into the
+sergeant’s hand.
+
+Then Dicky’s smile came back again, for he knew that the hours of his
+captivity were numbered; and he hummed, in time with the sentry’s
+tread:
+
+“They’re hanging men and women now,
+ For lacking of the green.”
+
+
+So, that night Dicky sat by the window of the room over his shop and
+his little saint sat close by, working at something silken and dainty.
+Dicky was thoughtful and grave. His red hair was in an unusual state of
+disorder. Pasa’s fingers often ached to smooth and arrange it, but
+Dicky would never allow it. He was poring, to-night, over a great
+litter of maps and books and papers on his table until that
+perpendicular line came between his brows that always distressed Pasa.
+Presently she went and brought his hat, and stood with it until he
+looked up, inquiringly.
+
+“It is sad for you here,” she explained. “Go out and drink _vino
+blanco_. Come back when you get that smile you used to wear. That is
+what I wish to see.”
+
+Dicky laughed and threw down his papers. “The _vino blanco_ stage is
+past. It has served its turn. Perhaps, after all, there was less
+entered my mouth and more my ears than people thought. But, there will
+be no more maps or frowns to-night. I promise you that. Come.”
+
+They sat upon a reed _silleta_ at the window and watched the quivering
+gleams from the lights of the _Catarina_ reflected in the harbour.
+
+Presently Pasa rippled out one of her infrequent chirrups of audible
+laughter.
+
+“I was thinking,” she began, anticipating Dicky’s question, “of the
+foolish things girls have in their minds. Because I went to school in
+the States I used to have ambitions. Nothing less than to be the
+president’s wife would satisfy me. And, look, thou red picaroon, to
+what obscure fate thou hast stolen me!”
+
+“Don’t give up hope,” said Dicky, smiling. “More than one Irishman has
+been the ruler of a South American country. There was a dictator of
+Chili named O’Higgins. Why not a President Maloney, of Anchuria? Say
+the word, _santita mia_, and we’ll make the race.”
+
+“No, no, no, thou red-haired, reckless one!” sighed Pasa; “I am
+content”—she laid her head against his arm—“here.”
+
+
+
+
+XVI
+ROUGE ET NOIR
+
+
+It has been indicated that disaffection followed the elevation of
+Losada to the presidency. This feeling continued to grow. Throughout
+the entire republic there seemed to be a spirit of silent, sullen
+discontent. Even the old Liberal party to which Goodwin, Zavalla and
+other patriots had lent their aid was disappointed. Losada had failed
+to become a popular idol. Fresh taxes, fresh import duties and, more
+than all, his tolerance of the outrageous oppression of citizens by the
+military had rendered him the most obnoxious president since the
+despicable Alforan. The majority of his own cabinet were out of
+sympathy with him. The army, which he had courted by giving it license
+to tyrannize, had been his main, and thus far adequate support.
+
+But the most impolitic of the administration’s moves had been when it
+antagonized the Vesuvius Fruit Company, an organization plying twelve
+steamers and with a cash capital somewhat larger than Anchuria’s
+surplus and debt combined.
+
+Reasonably an established concern like the Vesuvius would become
+irritated at having a small, retail republic with no rating at all
+attempt to squeeze it. So when the government proxies applied for a
+subsidy they encountered a polite refusal. The president at once
+retaliated by clapping an export duty of one _real_ per bunch on
+bananas—a thing unprecedented in fruit-growing countries. The Vesuvius
+Company had invested large sums in wharves and plantations along the
+Anchurian coast, their agents had erected fine homes in the towns where
+they had their headquarters, and heretofore had worked with the
+republic in good-will and with advantage to both. It would lose an
+immense sum if compelled to move out. The selling price of bananas from
+Vera Cruz to Trinidad was three _reals_ per bunch. This new duty of one
+_real_ would have ruined the fruit growers in Anchuria and have
+seriously discommoded the Vesuvius Company had it declined to pay it.
+But for some reason, the Vesuvius continued to buy Anchurian fruit,
+paying four _reals_ for it; and not suffering the growers to bear the
+loss.
+
+This apparent victory deceived His Excellency; and he began to hunger
+for more of it. He sent an emissary to request a conference with a
+representative of the fruit company. The Vesuvius sent Mr. Franzoni, a
+little, stout, cheerful man, always cool, and whistling airs from
+Verdi’s operas. Señor Espirition, of the office of the Minister of
+Finance, attempted the sandbagging in behalf of Anchuria. The meeting
+took place in the cabin of the _Salvador_, of the Vesuvius line.
+
+Señor Espirition opened negotiations by announcing that the government
+contemplated the building of a railroad to skirt the alluvial coast
+lands. After touching upon the benefits such a road would confer upon
+the interests of the Vesuvius, he reached the definite suggestion that
+a contribution to the road’s expenses of, say, fifty thousand _pesos_
+would not be more than an equivalent to benefits received.
+
+Mr. Franzoni denied that his company would receive any benefits from a
+contemplated road. As its representative he must decline to contribute
+fifty thousand _pesos_. But he would assume the responsibility of
+offering twenty-five.
+
+Did Señor Espirition understand Señor Franzoni to mean twenty-five
+thousand _pesos_?
+
+By no means. Twenty-five _pesos_. And in silver; not in gold.
+
+“Your offer insults my government,” cried Señor Espirition, rising with
+indignation.
+
+“Then,” said Mr. Franzoni, in warning tone, “_we will change it_.”
+
+The offer was never changed. Could Mr. Franzoni have meant the
+government?
+
+This was the state of affairs in Anchuria when the winter season opened
+at Coralio at the end of the second year of Losada’s administration.
+So, when the government and society made its annual exodus to the
+seashore it was evident that the presidential advent would not be
+celebrated by unlimited rejoicing. The tenth of November was the day
+set for the entrance into Coralio of the gay company from the capital.
+A narrow-gauge railroad runs twenty miles into the interior from
+Solitas. The government party travels by carriage from San Mateo to
+this road’s terminal point, and proceeds by train to Solitas. From here
+they march in grand procession to Coralio where, on the day of their
+coming, festivities and ceremonies abound. But this season saw an
+ominous dawning of the tenth of November.
+
+Although the rainy season was over, the day seemed to hark back to
+reeking June. A fine drizzle of rain fell all during the forenoon. The
+procession entered Coralio amid a strange silence.
+
+President Losada was an elderly man, grizzly bearded, with a
+considerable ratio of Indian blood revealed in his cinnamon complexion.
+His carriage headed the procession, surrounded and guarded by Captain
+Cruz and his famous troop of one hundred light horse “_El Ciento
+Huilando_.” Colonel Rocas followed, with a regiment of the regular
+army.
+
+The president’s sharp, beady eyes glanced about him for the expected
+demonstration of welcome; but he faced a stolid, indifferent array of
+citizens. Sight-seers the Anchurians are by birth and habit, and they
+turned out to their last able-bodied unit to witness the scene; but
+they maintained an accusive silence. They crowded the streets to the
+very wheel ruts; they covered the red tile roofs to the eaves, but
+there was never a “_viva_” from them. No wreaths of palm and lemon
+branches or gorgeous strings of paper roses hung from the windows and
+balconies as was the custom. There was an apathy, a dull, dissenting
+disapprobation, that was the more ominous because it puzzled. No one
+feared an outburst, a revolt of the discontents, for they had no
+leader. The president and those loyal to him had never even heard
+whispered a name among them capable of crystallizing the
+dissatisfaction into opposition. No, there could be no danger. The
+people always procured a new idol before they destroyed an old one.
+
+At length, after a prodigious galloping and curvetting of red-sashed
+majors, gold-laced colonels and epauletted generals, the procession
+formed for its annual progress down the Calle Grande to the Casa
+Morena, where the ceremony of welcome to the visiting president always
+took place.
+
+The Swiss band led the line of march. After it pranced the local
+_comandante_, mounted, and a detachment of his troops. Next came a
+carriage with four members of the cabinet, conspicuous among them the
+Minister of War, old General Pilar, with his white moustache and his
+soldierly bearing. Then the president’s vehicle, containing also the
+Ministers of Finance and State; and surrounded by Captain Cruz’s light
+horse formed in a close double file of fours. Following them, the rest
+of the officials of state, the judges and distinguished military and
+social ornaments of public and private life.
+
+As the band struck up, and the movement began, like a bird of ill-omen
+the _Valhalla_, the swiftest steamship of the Vesuvius line, glided
+into the harbour in plain view of the president and his train. Of
+course, there was nothing menacing about its arrival—a business firm
+does not go to war with a nation—but it reminded Señor Espirition and
+others in those carriages that the Vesuvius Fruit Company was
+undoubtedly carrying something up its sleeve for them.
+
+By the time the van of the procession had reached the government
+building, Captain Cronin, of the _Valhalla_, and Mr. Vincenti, member
+of the Vesuvius Company, had landed and were pushing their way, bluff,
+hearty and nonchalant, through the crowd on the narrow sidewalk. Clad
+in white linen, big, debonair, with an air of good-humoured authority,
+they made conspicuous figures among the dark mass of unimposing
+Anchurians, as they penetrated to within a few yards of the steps of
+the Casa Morena. Looking easily above the heads of the crowd, they
+perceived another that towered above the undersized natives. It was the
+fiery poll of Dicky Maloney against the wall close by the lower step;
+and his broad, seductive grin showed that he recognized their presence.
+
+Dicky had attired himself becomingly for the festive occasion in a
+well-fitting black suit. Pasa was close by his side, her head covered
+with the ubiquitous black mantilla.
+
+Mr. Vincenti looked at her attentively.
+
+“Botticelli’s Madonna,” he remarked, gravely. “I wonder when she got
+into the game. I don’t like his getting tangled with the women. I hoped
+he would keep away from them.”
+
+Captain Cronin’s laugh almost drew attention from the parade.
+
+“With that head of hair! Keep away from the women! And a Maloney!
+Hasn’t he got a license? But, nonsense aside, what do you think of the
+prospects? It’s a species of filibustering out of my line.”
+
+Vincenti glanced again at Dicky’s head and smiled.
+
+“_Rouge et noir_,” he said. “There you have it. Make your play,
+gentlemen. Our money is on the red.”
+
+“The lad’s game,” said Cronin, with a commending look at the tall, easy
+figure by the steps. “But ’tis all like fly-by-night theatricals to me.
+The talk’s bigger than the stage; there’s a smell of gasoline in the
+air, and they’re their own audience and scene-shifters.”
+
+They ceased talking, for General Pilar had descended from the first
+carriage and had taken his stand upon the top step of Casa Morena. As
+the oldest member of the cabinet, custom had decreed that he should
+make the address of welcome, presenting the keys of the official
+residence to the president at its close.
+
+General Pilar was one of the most distinguished citizens of the
+republic. Hero of three wars and innumerable revolutions, he was an
+honoured guest at European courts and camps. An eloquent speaker and a
+friend to the people, he represented the highest type of the
+Anchurians.
+
+Holding in his hand the gilt keys of Casa Morena, he began his address
+in a historical form, touching upon each administration and the advance
+of civilization and prosperity from the first dim striving after
+liberty down to present times. Arriving at the régime of President
+Losada, at which point, according to precedent, he should have
+delivered a eulogy upon its wise conduct and the happiness of the
+people, General Pilar paused. Then he silently held up the bunch of
+keys high above his head, with his eyes closely regarding it. The
+ribbon with which they were bound fluttered in the breeze.
+
+“It still blows,” cried the speaker, exultantly. “Citizens of Anchuria,
+give thanks to the saints this night that our air is still free.”
+
+Thus disposing of Losada’s administration, he abruptly reverted to that
+of Olivarra, Anchuria’s most popular ruler. Olivarra had been
+assassinated nine years before while in the prime of life and
+usefulness. A faction of the Liberal party led by Losada himself had
+been accused of the deed. Whether guilty or not, it was eight years
+before the ambitious and scheming Losada had gained his goal.
+
+Upon this theme General Pilar’s eloquence was loosed. He drew the
+picture of the beneficent Olivarra with a loving hand. He reminded the
+people of the peace, the security and the happiness they had enjoyed
+during that period. He recalled in vivid detail and with significant
+contrast the last winter sojourn of President Olivarra in Coralio, when
+his appearance at their fiestas was the signal for thundering _vivas_
+of love and approbation.
+
+The first public expression of sentiment from the people that day
+followed. A low, sustained murmur went among them like the surf rolling
+along the shore.
+
+“Ten dollars to a dinner at the Saint Charles,” remarked Mr. Vincenti,
+“that _rouge_ wins.”
+
+“I never bet against my own interests,” said Captain Cronin, lighting a
+cigar. “Long-winded old boy, for his age. What’s he talking about?”
+
+“My Spanish,” replied Vincenti, “runs about ten words to the minute;
+his is something around two hundred. Whatever he’s saying, he’s getting
+them warmed up.”
+
+“Friends and brothers,” General Pilar was saying, “could I reach out my
+hand this day across the lamentable silence of the grave to Olivarra
+‘the Good,’ to the ruler who was one of you, whose tears fell when you
+sorrowed, and whose smile followed your joy—I would bring him back to
+you, but—Olivarra is dead—dead at the hands of a craven assassin!”
+
+The speaker turned and gazed boldly into the carriage of the president.
+His arm remained extended aloft as if to sustain his peroration. The
+president was listening, aghast, at this remarkable address of welcome.
+He was sunk back upon his seat, trembling with rage and dumb surprise,
+his dark hands tightly gripping the carriage cushions.
+
+Half rising, he extended one arm toward the speaker, and shouted a
+harsh command at Captain Cruz. The leader of the “Flying Hundred” sat
+his horse, immovable, with folded arms, giving no sign of having heard.
+Losada sank back again, his dark features distinctly paling.
+
+“Who says that Olivarra is dead?” suddenly cried the speaker, his
+voice, old as he was, sounding like a battle trumpet. “His body lies in
+the grave, but to the people he loved he has bequeathed his spirit—yes,
+more—his learning, his courage, his kindness—yes, more—his youth, his
+image—people of Anchuria, have you forgotten Ramon, the son of
+Olivarra?”
+
+Cronin and Vincenti, watching closely, saw Dicky Maloney suddenly raise
+his hat, tear off his shock of red hair, leap up the steps and stand at
+the side of General Pilar. The Minister of War laid his arm across the
+young man’s shoulders. All who had known President Olivarra saw again
+his same lion-like pose, the same frank, undaunted expression, the same
+high forehead with the peculiar line of the clustering, crisp black
+hair.
+
+General Pilar was an experienced orator. He seized the moment of
+breathless silence that preceded the storm.
+
+“Citizens of Anchuria,” he trumpeted, holding aloft the keys to Casa
+Morena, “I am here to deliver these keys—the keys to your homes and
+liberty—to your chosen president. Shall I deliver them to Enrico
+Olivarra’s assassin, or to his son?”
+
+“Olivarra! Olivarra!” the crowd shrieked and howled. All vociferated
+the magic name—men, women, children and the parrots.
+
+And the enthusiasm was not confined to the blood of the plebs. Colonel
+Rocas ascended the steps and laid his sword theatrically at young Ramon
+Olivarra’s feet. Four members of the cabinet embraced him. Captain Cruz
+gave a command, and twenty of _El Ciento Huilando_ dismounted and
+arranged themselves in a cordon about the steps of Casa Morena.
+
+But Ramon Olivarra seized that moment to prove himself a born genius
+and politician. He waved those soldiers aside, and descended the steps
+to the street. There, without losing his dignity or the distinguished
+elegance that the loss of his red hair brought him, he took the
+proletariat to his bosom—the barefooted, the dirty, Indians, Caribs,
+babies, beggars, old, young, saints, soldiers and sinners—he missed
+none of them.
+
+While this act of the drama was being presented, the scene shifters had
+been busy at the duties that had been assigned to them. Two of Cruz’s
+dragoons had seized the bridle reins of Losada’s horses; others formed
+a close guard around the carriage; and they galloped off with the
+tyrant and his two unpopular Ministers. No doubt a place had been
+prepared for them. There are a number of well-barred stone apartments
+in Coralio.
+
+“_Rouge_ wins,” said Mr. Vincenti, calmly lighting another cigar.
+
+Captain Cronin had been intently watching the vicinity of the stone
+steps for some time.
+
+“Good boy!” he exclaimed suddenly, as if relieved. “I wondered if he
+was going to forget his Kathleen Mavourneen.”
+
+Young Olivarra had reascended the steps and spoken a few words to
+General Pilar. Then that distinguished veteran descended to the ground
+and approached Pasa, who still stood, wonder-eyed, where Dicky had left
+her. With his plumed hat in his hand, and his medals and decorations
+shining on his breast, the general spoke to her and gave her his arm,
+and they went up the stone steps of the Casa Morena together. And then
+Ramon Olivarra stepped forward and took both her hands before all the
+people.
+
+And while the cheering was breaking out afresh everywhere, Captain
+Cronin and Mr. Vincenti turned and walked back toward the shore where
+the gig was waiting for them.
+
+“There’ll be another ‘_presidente proclamada_’ in the morning,” said
+Mr. Vincenti, musingly. “As a rule they are not as reliable as the
+elected ones, but this youngster seems to have some good stuff in him.
+He planned and manœuvred the entire campaign. Olivarra’s widow, you
+know, was wealthy. After her husband was assassinated she went to the
+States, and educated her son at Yale. The Vesuvius Company hunted him
+up, and backed him in the little game.”
+
+“It’s a glorious thing,” said Cronin, half jestingly, “to be able to
+discharge a government, and insert one of your own choosing, in these
+days.”
+
+“Oh, it is only a matter of business,” said Vincenti, stopping and
+offering the stump of his cigar to a monkey that swung down from a lime
+tree; “and that is what moves the world of to-day. That extra _real_ on
+the price of bananas had to go. We took the shortest way of removing
+it.”
+
+
+
+
+XVII
+TWO RECALLS
+
+
+There remains three duties to be performed before the curtain falls
+upon the patched comedy. Two have been promised: the third is no less
+obligatory.
+
+It was set forth in the programme of this tropic vaudeville that it
+would be made known why Shorty O’Day, of the Columbia Detective Agency,
+lost his position. Also that Smith should come again to tell us what
+mystery he followed that night on the shores of Anchuria when he
+strewed so many cigar stumps around the cocoanut palm during his lonely
+night vigil on the beach. These things were promised; but a bigger
+thing yet remains to be accomplished—the clearing up of a seeming wrong
+that has been done according to the array of chronicled facts
+(truthfully set forth) that have been presented. And one voice,
+speaking, shall do these three things.
+
+Two men sat on a stringer of a North River pier in the City of New
+York. A steamer from the tropics had begun to unload bananas and
+oranges on the pier. Now and then a banana or two would fall from an
+overripe bunch, and one of the two men would shamble forward, seize the
+fruit and return to share it with his companion.
+
+One of the men was in the ultimate stage of deterioration. As far as
+rain and wind and sun could wreck the garments he wore, it had been
+done. In his person the ravages of drink were as plainly visible. And
+yet, upon his high-bridged, rubicund nose was jauntily perched a pair
+of shining and flawless gold-rimmed glasses.
+
+The other man was not so far gone upon the descending Highway of the
+Incompetents. Truly, the flower of his manhood had gone to seed—seed
+that, perhaps, no soil might sprout. But there were still cross-cuts
+along where he travelled through which he might yet regain the pathway
+of usefulness without disturbing the slumbering Miracles. This man was
+short and compactly built. He had an oblique, dead eye, like that of a
+sting-ray, and the moustache of a cocktail mixer. We know the eye and
+the moustache; we know that Smith of the luxurious yacht, the gorgeous
+raiment, the mysterious mission, the magic disappearance, has come
+again, though shorn of the accessories of his former state.
+
+At his third banana, the man with the nose glasses spat it from him
+with a shudder.
+
+“Deuce take all fruit!” he remarked, in a patrician tone of disgust. “I
+lived for two years where these things grow. The memory of their taste
+lingers with you. The oranges are not so bad. Just see if you can
+gather a couple of them, O’Day, when the next broken crate comes up.”
+
+“Did you live down with the monkeys?” asked the other, made tepidly
+garrulous by the sunshine and the alleviating meal of juicy fruit. “I
+was down there, once myself. But only for a few hours. That was when I
+was with the Columbia Detective Agency. The monkey people did me up.
+I’d have my job yet if it hadn’t been for them. I’ll tell you about it.
+
+“One day the chief sent a note around to the office that read: ‘Send
+O’Day here at once for a big piece of business.’ I was the crack
+detective of the agency at that time. They always handed me the big
+jobs. The address the chief wrote from was down in the Wall Street
+district.
+
+“When I got there I found him in a private office with a lot of
+directors who were looking pretty fuzzy. They stated the case. The
+president of the Republic Insurance Company had skipped with about a
+tenth of a million dollars in cash. The directors wanted him back
+pretty bad, but they wanted the money worse. They said they needed it.
+They had traced the old gent’s movements to where he boarded a tramp
+fruit steamer bound for South America that same morning with his
+daughter and a big gripsack—all the family he had.
+
+“One of the directors had his steam yacht coaled and with steam up,
+ready for the trip; and he turned her over to me, cart blongsh. In four
+hours I was on board of her, and hot on the trail of the fruit tub. I
+had a pretty good idea where old Wahrfield—that was his name, J.
+Churchill Wahrfield—would head for. At that time we had a treaty with
+about every foreign country except Belgium and that banana republic,
+Anchuria. There wasn’t a photo of old Wahrfield to be had in New
+York—he had been foxy there—but I had his description. And besides, the
+lady with him would be a dead-give-away anywhere. She was one of the
+high-flyers in Society—not the kind that have their pictures in the
+Sunday papers—but the real sort that open chrysanthemum shows and
+christen battleships.
+
+“Well, sir, we never got a sight of that fruit tub on the road. The
+ocean is a pretty big place; and I guess we took different paths across
+it. But we kept going toward this Anchuria, where the fruiter was bound
+for.
+
+“We struck the monkey coast one afternoon about four. There was a
+ratty-looking steamer off shore taking on bananas. The monkeys were
+loading her up with big barges. It might be the one the old man had
+taken, and it might not. I went ashore to look around. The scenery was
+pretty good. I never saw any finer on the New York stage. I struck an
+American on shore, a big, cool chap, standing around with the monkeys.
+He showed me the consul’s office. The consul was a nice young fellow.
+He said the fruiter was the _Karlsefin_, running generally to New
+Orleans, but took her last cargo to New York. Then I was sure my people
+were on board, although everybody told me that no passengers had
+landed. I didn’t think they would land until after dark, for they might
+have been shy about it on account of seeing that yacht of mine hanging
+around. So, all I had to do was to wait and nab ’em when they came
+ashore. I couldn’t arrest old Wahrfield without extradition papers, but
+my play was to get the cash. They generally give up if you strike ’em
+when they’re tired and rattled and short on nerve.
+
+“After dark I sat under a cocoanut tree on the beach for a while, and
+then I walked around and investigated that town some, and it was enough
+to give you the lions. If a man could stay in New York and be honest,
+he’d better do it than to hit that monkey town with a million.
+
+“Dinky little mud houses; grass over your shoe tops in the streets;
+ladies in low-neck-and-short-sleeves walking around smoking cigars;
+tree frogs rattling like a hose cart going to a ten blow; big mountains
+dropping gravel in the back yards, and the sea licking the paint off in
+front—no, sir—a man had better be in God’s country living on free lunch
+than there.
+
+“The main street ran along the beach, and I walked down it, and then
+turned up a kind of lane where the houses were made of poles and straw.
+I wanted to see what the monkeys did when they weren’t climbing
+cocoanut trees. The very first shack I looked in I saw my people. They
+must have come ashore while I was promenading. A man about fifty,
+smooth face, heavy eyebrows, dressed in black broadcloth, looking like
+he was just about to say, ‘Can any little boy in the Sunday school
+answer that?’ He was freezing on to a grip that weighed like a dozen
+gold bricks, and a swell girl—a regular peach, with a Fifth Avenue
+cut—was sitting on a wooden chair. An old black woman was fixing some
+coffee and beans on a table. The light they had come from a lantern
+hung on a nail. I went and stood in the door, and they looked at me,
+and I said:
+
+“‘Mr. Wahrfield, you are my prisoner. I hope, for the lady’s sake, you
+will take the matter sensibly. You know why I want you.’
+
+“‘Who are you?’ says the old gent.
+
+“‘O’Day,’ says I, ‘of the Columbia Detective Agency. And now, sir, let
+me give you a piece of good advice. You go back and take your medicine
+like a man. Hand ’em back the boodle; and maybe they’ll let you off
+light. Go back easy, and I’ll put in a word for you. I’ll give you five
+minutes to decide.’ I pulled out my watch and waited.
+
+“Then the young lady chipped in. She was one of the genuine
+high-steppers. You could tell by the way her clothes fit and the style
+she had that Fifth Avenue was made for her.
+
+“‘Come inside,’ she says. ‘Don’t stand in the door and disturb the
+whole street with that suit of clothes. Now, what is it you want?’
+
+“‘Three minutes gone,’ I said. ‘I’ll tell you again while the other two
+tick off.
+
+“‘You’ll admit being the president of the Republic, won’t you?’
+
+“‘I am,’ says he.
+
+“‘Well, then,’ says I, ‘it ought to be plain to you. Wanted, in New
+York, J. Churchill Wahrfield, president of the Republic Insurance
+Company.
+
+“‘Also the funds belonging to said company, now in that grip, in the
+unlawful possession of said J. Churchill Wahrfield.’
+
+“‘Oh-h-h-h!’ says the young lady, as if she was thinking, ‘you want to
+take us back to New York?’
+
+“‘To take Mr. Wahrfield. There’s no charge against you, miss. There’ll
+be no objection, of course, to your returning with your father.’
+
+“Of a sudden the girl gave a tiny scream and grabbed the old boy around
+the neck. ‘Oh, father, father!’ she says, kind of contralto, ‘can this
+be true? Have you taken money that is not yours? Speak, father!’ It
+made you shiver to hear the tremolo stop she put on her voice.
+
+“The old boy looked pretty bughouse when she first grappled him, but
+she went on, whispering in his ear and patting his off shoulder till he
+stood still, but sweating a little.
+
+“She got him to one side and they talked together a minute, and then he
+put on some gold eyeglasses and walked up and handed me the grip.
+
+“‘Mr. Detective,’ he says, talking a little broken, ‘I conclude to
+return with you. I have finished to discover that life on this desolate
+and displeased coast would be worse than to die, itself. I will go back
+and hurl myself upon the mercy of the Republic Company. Have you
+brought a sheep?’
+
+“‘Sheep!’ says I; ‘I haven’t a single—’
+
+“‘Ship,’ cut in the young lady. ‘Don’t get funny. Father is of German
+birth, and doesn’t speak perfect English. How did you come?’
+
+“The girl was all broke up. She had a handkerchief to her face, and
+kept saying every little bit, ‘Oh, father, father!’ She walked up to me
+and laid her lily-white hand on the clothes that had pained her at
+first. I smelt a million violets. She was a lulu. I told her I came in
+a private yacht.
+
+“‘Mr. O’Day,’ she says. ‘Oh, take us away from this horrid country at
+once. Can you! Will you! Say you will.’
+
+“‘I’ll try,’ I said, concealing the fact that I was dying to get them
+on salt water before they could change their mind.
+
+“One thing they both kicked against was going through the town to the
+boat landing. Said they dreaded publicity, and now that they were going
+to return, they had a hope that the thing might yet be kept out of the
+papers. They swore they wouldn’t go unless I got them out to the yacht
+without any one knowing it, so I agreed to humour them.
+
+“The sailors who rowed me ashore were playing billiards in a bar-room
+near the water, waiting for orders, and I proposed to have them take
+the boat down the beach half a mile or so, and take us up there. How to
+get them word was the question, for I couldn’t leave the grip with the
+prisoner, and I couldn’t take it with me, not knowing but what the
+monkeys might stick me up.
+
+“The young lady says the old coloured woman would take them a note. I
+sat down and wrote it, and gave it to the dame with plain directions
+what to do, and she grins like a baboon and shakes her head.
+
+“Then Mr. Wahrfield handed her a string of foreign dialect, and she
+nods her head and says, ‘See, señor,’ maybe fifty times, and lights out
+with the note.
+
+“‘Old Augusta only understands German,’ said Miss Wahrfield, smiling at
+me. ‘We stopped in her house to ask where we could find lodging, and
+she insisted upon our having coffee. She tells us she was raised in a
+German family in San Domingo.’
+
+“‘Very likely,’ I said. ‘But you can search me for German words, except
+_nix verstay_ and _noch einst_. I would have called that “See, señor”
+French, though, on a gamble.’
+
+“Well, we three made a sneak around the edge of town so as not to be
+seen. We got tangled in vines and ferns and the banana bushes and
+tropical scenery a good deal. The monkey suburbs was as wild as places
+in Central Park. We came out on the beach a good half mile below. A
+brown chap was lying asleep under a cocoanut tree, with a ten-foot
+musket beside him. Mr. Wahrfield takes up the gun and pitches it into
+the sea. ‘The coast is guarded,’ he says. ‘Rebellion and plots ripen
+like fruit.’ He pointed to the sleeping man, who never stirred. ‘Thus,’
+he says, ‘they perform trusts. Children!’
+
+“I saw our boat coming, and I struck a match and lit a piece of
+newspaper to show them where we were. In thirty minutes we were on
+board the yacht.
+
+“The first thing, Mr. Wahrfield and his daughter and I took the grip
+into the owner’s cabin, opened it up, and took an inventory. There was
+one hundred and five thousand dollars, United States treasury notes, in
+it, besides a lot of diamond jewelry and a couple of hundred Havana
+cigars. I gave the old man the cigars and a receipt for the rest of the
+lot, as agent for the company, and locked the stuff up in my private
+quarters.
+
+“I never had a pleasanter trip than that one. After we got to sea the
+young lady turned out to be the jolliest ever. The very first time we
+sat down to dinner, and the steward filled her glass with
+champagne—that director’s yacht was a regular floating
+Waldorf-Astoria—she winks at me and says, ‘What’s the use to borrow
+trouble, Mr. Fly Cop? Here’s hoping you may live to eat the hen that
+scratches on your grave.’ There was a piano on board, and she sat down
+to it and sung better than you give up two cases to hear plenty times.
+She knew about nine operas clear through. She was sure enough _bon ton_
+and swell. She wasn’t one of the ‘among others present’ kind; she
+belonged on the special mention list!
+
+“The old man, too, perked up amazingly on the way. He passed the
+cigars, and says to me once, quite chipper, out of a cloud of smoke,
+‘Mr. O’Day, somehow I think the Republic Company will not give me the
+much trouble. Guard well the gripvalise of the money, Mr. O’Day, for
+that it must be returned to them that it belongs when we finish to
+arrive.’
+
+“When we landed in New York I ’phoned to the chief to meet us in that
+director’s office. We got in a cab and went there. I carried the grip,
+and we walked in, and I was pleased to see that the chief had got
+together that same old crowd of moneybugs with pink faces and white
+vests to see us march in. I set the grip on the table. ‘There’s the
+money,’ I said.
+
+“‘And your prisoner?’ said the chief.
+
+“I pointed to Mr. Wahrfield, and he stepped forward and says:
+
+“‘The honour of a word with you, sir, to explain.’
+
+“He and the chief went into another room and stayed ten minutes. When
+they came back the chief looked as black as a ton of coal.
+
+“‘Did this gentleman,’ he says to me, ‘have this valise in his
+possession when you first saw him?’
+
+“‘He did,’ said I.
+
+“The chief took up the grip and handed it to the prisoner with a bow,
+and says to the director crowd: ‘Do any of you recognize this
+gentleman?’
+
+“They all shook their pink faces.
+
+“‘Allow me to present,’ he goes on, Señor Miraflores, president of the
+republic of Anchuria. The señor has generously consented to overlook
+this outrageous blunder, on condition that we undertake to secure him
+against the annoyance of public comment. It is a concession on his part
+to overlook an insult for which he might claim international redress. I
+think we can gratefully promise him secrecy in the matter.’
+
+“They gave him a pink nod all round.
+
+“‘O’Day,’ he says to me. ‘As a private detective you’re wasted. In a
+war, where kidnapping governments is in the rules, you’d be invaluable.
+Come down to the office at eleven.’
+
+“I knew what that meant.
+
+“‘So that’s the president of the monkeys,’ says I. ‘Well, why couldn’t
+he have said so?’
+
+“Wouldn’t it jar you?”
+
+
+
+
+XVIII
+THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE
+
+
+Vaudeville is intrinsically episodic and discontinuous. Its audiences
+do not demand dénouements. Sufficient unto each “turn” is the evil
+thereof. No one cares how many romances the singing comédienne may have
+had if she can capably sustain the limelight and a high note or two.
+The audiences reck not if the performing dogs get to the pound the
+moment they have jumped through their last hoop. They do not desire
+bulletins about the possible injuries received by the comic bicyclist
+who retires head-first from the stage in a crash of (property)
+china-ware. Neither do they consider that their seat coupons entitle
+them to be instructed whether or no there is a sentiment between the
+lady solo banjoist and the Irish monologist.
+
+Therefore let us have no lifting of the curtain upon a tableau of the
+united lovers, backgrounded by defeated villainy and derogated by the
+comic, osculating maid and butler, thrown in as a sop to the Cerberi of
+the fifty-cent seats.
+
+But our programme ends with a brief “turn” or two; and then to the
+exits. Whoever sits the show out may find, if he will, the slender
+thread that binds together, though ever so slightly, the story that,
+perhaps, only the Walrus will understand.
+
+_Extracts from a letter from the first vice-president of the Republic
+Insurance Company, of New York City, to Frank Goodwin, of Coralio,
+Republic of Anchuria._
+
+My Dear Mr. Goodwin:—Your communication per Messrs. Howland and
+Fourchet, of New Orleans, has reached us. Also their draft on N. Y. for
+$100,000, the amount abstracted from the funds of this company by the
+late J. Churchill Wahrfield, its former president. … The officers and
+directors unite in requesting me to express to you their sincere esteem
+and thanks for your prompt and much appreciated return of the entire
+missing sum within two weeks from the time of its disappearance. … Can
+assure you that the matter will not be allowed to receive the least
+publicity. … Regret exceedingly the distressing death of Mr. Wahrfield
+by his own hand, but… Congratulations on your marriage to Miss
+Wahrfield … many charms, winning manners, noble and womanly nature and
+envied position in the best metropolitan society…
+
+
+Cordially yours,
+Lucius E. Applegate,
+First Vice-President the Republic Insurance Company.
+
+_The Vitagraphoscope_
+(Moving Pictures)
+
+_The Last Sausage_
+
+SCENE—_An Artist’s Studio._ The artist, a young man of prepossessing
+appearance, sits in a dejected attitude, amid a litter of sketches,
+with his head resting upon his hand. An oil stove stands on a pine box
+in the centre of the studio. The artist rises, tightens his waist belt
+to another hole, and lights the stove. He goes to a tin bread box,
+half-hidden by a screen, takes out a solitary link of sausage, turns
+the box upside-down to show that there is no more, and chucks the
+sausage into a frying-pan, which he sets upon the stove. The flame of
+the stove goes out, showing that there is no more oil. The artist, in
+evident despair, seizes the sausage, in a sudden access of rage, and
+hurls it violently from him. At the same time a door opens, and a man
+who enters receives the sausage forcibly against his nose. He seems to
+cry out; and is observed to make a dance step or two, vigorously. The
+newcomer is a ruddy-faced, active, keen-looking man, apparently of
+Irish ancestry. Next he is observed to laugh immoderately; he kicks
+over the stove; he claps the artist (who is vainly striving to grasp
+his hand) vehemently upon the back. Then he goes through a pantomime
+which to the sufficiently intelligent spectator reveals that he has
+acquired large sums of money by trading pot-metal hatchets and razors
+to the Indians of the Cordillera Mountains for gold dust. He draws a
+roll of money as large as a small loaf of bread from his pocket, and
+waves it above his head, while at the same time he makes pantomime of
+drinking from a glass. The artist hurriedly secures his hat, and the
+two leave the studio together.
+
+_The Writing on the Sands_
+
+SCENE—_The Beach at Nice._ A woman, beautiful, still young, exquisitely
+clothed, complacent, poised, reclines near the water, idly scrawling
+letters in the sand with the staff of her silken parasol. The beauty of
+her face is audacious; her languid pose is one that you feel to be
+impermanent—you wait, expectant, for her to spring or glide or crawl,
+like a panther that has unaccountably become stock-still. She idly
+scrawls in the sand; and the word that she always writes is “Isabel.” A
+man sits a few yards away. You can see that they are companions, even
+if no longer comrades. His face is dark and smooth, and almost
+inscrutable—but not quite. The two speak little together. The man also
+scratches on the sand with his cane. And the word that he writes is
+“Anchuria.” And then he looks out where the Mediterranean and the sky
+intermingle, with death in his gaze.
+
+_The Wilderness and Thou_
+
+SCENE—_The Borders of a Gentleman’s Estate in a Tropical Land._ An old
+Indian, with a mahogany-coloured face, is trimming the grass on a grave
+by a mangrove swamp. Presently he rises to his feet and walks slowly
+toward a grove that is shaded by the gathering, brief twilight. In the
+edge of the grove stand a man who is stalwart, with a kind and
+courteous air, and a woman of a serene and clear-cut loveliness. When
+the old Indian comes up to them the man drops money in his hand. The
+grave-tender, with the stolid pride of his race, takes it as his due,
+and goes his way. The two in the edge of the grove turn back along the
+dim pathway, and walk close, close—for, after all, what is the world at
+its best but a little round field of the moving pictures with two
+walking together in it?
+
+CURTAIN
+
+
+
+
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+<div style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Cabbages and Kings, by O. Henry</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
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+</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Cabbages and Kings</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: O. Henry</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: July 23, 2000 [eBook #2777]<br />
+[Most recently updated: February 2, 2022]</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>Character set encoding: UTF-8</div>
+<div style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Produced by: Earle C. Beach and Joseph E. Loewenstein, M.D.</div>
+<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CABBAGES AND KINGS ***</div>
+
+<div class="fig" style="width:55%;">
+<img src="images/cover.jpg" style="width:100%;" alt="[Illustration]" />
+</div>
+
+<div class="fig" style="width:100%;">
+<img src="images/frontis.jpg" width="406" height="600" alt="[Illustration]" />
+<p class="caption">&ldquo;A little saint with a color more lightful than orange&rdquo;</p>
+</div>
+
+<h1>CABBAGES AND KINGS</h1>
+
+<h2 class="no-break">by O. HENRY</h2>
+
+<h4><i>Author of &ldquo;The Four Million,&rdquo; &ldquo;The Voice of the
+City,&rdquo;<br/>
+&ldquo;The Trimmed Lamp,&rdquo; &ldquo;Strictly Business,&rdquo;
+&ldquo;Whirligigs,&rdquo; Etc.</i></h4>
+
+<hr />
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<p class="letter">
+&ldquo;The time has come,&rdquo; the Walrus said,<br/>
+    &ldquo;To talk of many things;<br/>
+Of shoes and ships and sealing-wax,<br/>
+    And cabbages and kings.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p class="right">
+<small>THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER</small>
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2>Contents</h2>
+
+<table summary="" style="">
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap00">THE PROEM BY THE CARPENTER</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap01">I. “FOX-IN-THE-MORNING”</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap02">II. THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap03">III. SMITH</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap04">IV. CAUGHT</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap05">V. CUPID’S EXILE NUMBER TWO</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap06">VI. THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap07">VII. MONEY MAZE</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap08">VIII. THE ADMIRAL</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap09">IX. THE FLAG PARAMOUNT</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap10">X. THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap11">XI. THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap12">XII. SHOES</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap13">XIII. SHIPS</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap14">XIV. MASTERS OF ARTS</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap15">XV. DICKY</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap16">XVI. ROUGE ET NOIR</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap17">XVII. TWO RECALLS</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+<tr>
+<td> <a href="#chap18">XVIII. THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE</a></td>
+</tr>
+
+</table>
+
+<hr />
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap00"></a>THE PROEM<br/>
+BY THE CARPENTER</h2>
+
+<p>
+They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that volatile
+republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio; that he had
+reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of an imminent revolution;
+and that one hundred thousand dollars, government funds, which he carried with
+him in an American leather valise as a souvenir of his tempestuous
+administration, was never afterward recovered.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For a <i>real</i>, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town near a
+little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of wood stands at its
+head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with a hot iron this inscription:
+</p>
+
+<p class="center">
+RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES<br/>
+Y MIRAFLORES<br/>
+PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA<br/>
+DE ANCHURIA<br/>
+QUE SEA SU JUEZ DIOS
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man beyond the
+grave. &ldquo;Let God be his judge!&rdquo;&mdash;Even with the hundred thousand
+unfound, though greatly coveted, the hue and cry went no further than that.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the story of the
+tragic end of their former president; how he strove to escape from the country
+with the public funds and also with Doña Isabel Guilbert, the young American
+opera singer; and how, being apprehended by members of the opposing political
+party in Coralio, he shot himself through the head rather than give up the
+funds, and, in consequence, the Señorita Guilbert. They will relate further
+that Doña Isabel, her adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the simultaneous
+loss of her distinguished admirer and the souvenir hundred thousand, dropped
+anchor on this stagnant coast, awaiting a rising tide.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They say, in Coralio, that she found a prompt and prosperous tide in the form
+of Frank Goodwin, an American resident of the town, an investor who had grown
+wealthy by dealing in the products of the country&mdash;a banana king, a rubber
+prince, a sarsaparilla, indigo, and mahogany baron. The Señorita Guilbert, you
+will be told, married Señor Goodwin one month after the president&rsquo;s
+death, thus, in the very moment when Fortune had ceased to smile, wresting from
+her a gift greater than the prize withdrawn.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Of the American, Don Frank Goodwin, and of his wife the natives have nothing
+but good to say. Don Frank has lived among them for years, and has compelled
+their respect. His lady is easily queen of what social life the sober coast
+affords. The wife of the governor of the district, herself, who was of the
+proud Castilian family of Monteleon y Dolorosa de los Santos y Mendez, feels
+honoured to unfold her napkin with olive-hued, ringed hands at the table of
+Señora Goodwin. Were you to refer (with your northern prejudices) to the
+vivacious past of Mrs. Goodwin when her audacious and gleeful abandon in light
+opera captured the mature president&rsquo;s fancy, or to her share in that
+statesman&rsquo;s downfall and malfeasance, the Latin shrug of the shoulder
+would be your only answer and rebuttal. What prejudices there were in Coralio
+concerning Señora Goodwin seemed now to be in her favour, whatever they had
+been in the past.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It would seem that the story is ended, instead of begun; that the close of
+tragedy and the climax of a romance have covered the ground of interest; but,
+to the more curious reader it shall be some slight instruction to trace the
+close threads that underlie the ingenuous web of circumstances.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The headpiece bearing the name of President Miraflores is daily scrubbed with
+soap-bark and sand. An old half-breed Indian tends the grave with fidelity and
+the dawdling minuteness of inherited sloth. He chops down the weeds and
+ever-springing grass with his machete, he plucks ants and scorpions and beetles
+from it with his horny fingers, and sprinkles its turf with water from the
+plaza fountain. There is no grave anywhere so well kept and ordered.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Only by following out the underlying threads will it be made clear why the old
+Indian, Galvez, is secretly paid to keep green the grave of President
+Miraflores by one who never saw that unfortunate statesman in life or in death,
+and why that one was wont to walk in the twilight, casting from a distance
+looks of gentle sadness upon that unhonoured mound.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Elsewhere than at Coralio one learns of the impetuous career of Isabel
+Guilbert. New Orleans gave her birth and the mingled French and Spanish creole
+nature that tinctured her life with such turbulence and warmth. She had little
+education, but a knowledge of men and motives that seemed to have come by
+instinct. Far beyond the common woman was she endowed with intrepid rashness,
+with a love for the pursuit of adventure to the brink of danger, and with
+desire for the pleasures of life. Her spirit was one to chafe under any curb;
+she was Eve after the fall, but before the bitterness of it was felt. She wore
+life as a rose in her bosom.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Of the legion of men who had been at her feet it was said that but one was so
+fortunate as to engage her fancy. To President Miraflores, the brilliant but
+unstable ruler of Anchuria, she yielded the key to her resolute heart. How,
+then, do we find her (as the Coralians would have told you) the wife of Frank
+Goodwin, and happily living a life of dull and dreamy inaction?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The underlying threads reach far, stretching across the sea. Following them out
+it will be made plain why &ldquo;Shorty&rdquo; O&rsquo;Day, of the Columbia
+Detective Agency, resigned his position. And, for a lighter pastime, it shall
+be a duty and a pleasing sport to wander with Momus beneath the tropic stars
+where Melpomene once stalked austere. Now to cause laughter to echo from those
+lavish jungles and frowning crags where formerly rang the cries of
+pirates&rsquo; victims; to lay aside pike and cutlass and attack with quip and
+jollity; to draw one saving titter of mirth from the rusty casque of
+Romance&mdash;this were pleasant to do in the shade of the lemon-trees on that
+coast that is curved like lips set for smiling.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For there are yet tales of the Spanish Main. That segment of continent washed
+by the tempestuous Caribbean, and presenting to the sea a formidable border of
+tropical jungle topped by the overweening Cordilleras, is still begirt by
+mystery and romance. In past times buccaneers and revolutionists roused the
+echoes of its cliffs, and the condor wheeled perpetually above where, in the
+green groves, they made food for him with their matchlocks and toledos. Taken
+and retaken by sea rovers, by adverse powers and by sudden uprising of
+rebellious factions, the historic 300 miles of adventurous coast has scarcely
+known for hundreds of years whom rightly to call its master. Pizarro, Balboa,
+Sir Francis Drake, and Bolivar did what they could to make it a part of
+Christendom. Sir John Morgan, Lafitte and other eminent swash-bucklers
+bombarded and pounded it in the name of Abaddon.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The game still goes on. The guns of the rovers are silenced; but the tintype
+man, the enlarged photograph brigand, the kodaking tourist and the scouts of
+the gentle brigade of fakirs have found it out, and carry on the work. The
+hucksters of Germany, France, and Sicily now bag its small change across their
+counters. Gentleman adventurers throng the waiting-rooms of its rulers with
+proposals for railways and concessions. The little <i>opéra-bouffe</i> nations
+play at government and intrigue until some day a big, silent gunboat glides
+into the offing and warns them not to break their toys. And with these changes
+comes also the small adventurer, with empty pockets to fill, light of heart,
+busy-brained&mdash;the modern fairy prince, bearing an alarm clock with which,
+more surely than by the sentimental kiss, to awaken the beautiful tropics from
+their centuries&rsquo; sleep. Generally he wears a shamrock, which he matches
+pridefully against the extravagant palms; and it is he who has driven Melpomene
+to the wings, and set Comedy to dancing before the footlights of the Southern
+Cross.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So, there is a little tale to tell of many things. Perhaps to the promiscuous
+ear of the Walrus it shall come with most avail; for in it there are indeed
+shoes and ships and sealing-wax and cabbage-palms and presidents instead of
+kings.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Add to these a little love and counterplotting, and scatter everywhere
+throughout the maze a trail of tropical dollars&mdash;dollars warmed no more by
+the torrid sun than by the hot palms of the scouts of Fortune&mdash;and, after
+all, here seems to be Life, itself, with talk enough to weary the most
+garrulous of Walruses.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap01"></a>I<br/>
+&ldquo;FOX-IN-THE-MORNING&rdquo;</h2>
+
+<p>
+Coralio reclined, in the mid-day heat, like some vacuous beauty lounging in a
+guarded harem. The town lay at the sea&rsquo;s edge on a strip of alluvial
+coast. It was set like a little pearl in an emerald band. Behind it, and
+seeming almost to topple, imminent, above it, rose the sea-following range of
+the Cordilleras. In front the sea was spread, a smiling jailer, but even more
+incorruptible than the frowning mountains. The waves swished along the smooth
+beach; the parrots screamed in the orange and ceiba-trees; the palms waved
+their limber fronds foolishly like an awkward chorus at the prima donna&rsquo;s
+cue to enter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Suddenly the town was full of excitement. A native boy dashed down a
+grass-grown street, shrieking: &ldquo;<i>Busca el Señor Goodwin. Ha venido un
+telégrafo por el!</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The word passed quickly. Telegrams do not often come to anyone in Coralio. The
+cry for Señor Goodwin was taken up by a dozen officious voices. The main street
+running parallel to the beach became populated with those who desired to
+expedite the delivery of the despatch. Knots of women with complexions varying
+from palest olive to deepest brown gathered at street corners and plaintively
+carolled: &ldquo;<i>Un telégrafo por Señor Goodwin!</i>&rdquo; The
+<i>comandante</i>, Don Señor el Coronel Encarnación Rios, who was loyal to the
+Ins and suspected Goodwin&rsquo;s devotion to the Outs, hissed:
+&ldquo;Aha!&rdquo; and wrote in his secret memorandum book the accusive fact
+that Señor Goodwin had on that momentous date received a telegram.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the midst of the hullabaloo a man stepped to the door of a small wooden
+building and looked out. Above the door was a sign that read &ldquo;Keogh and
+Clancy&rdquo;&mdash;a nomenclature that seemed not to be indigenous to that
+tropical soil. The man in the door was Billy Keogh, scout of fortune and
+progress and latter-day rover of the Spanish Main. Tintypes and photographs
+were the weapons with which Keogh and Clancy were at that time assailing the
+hopeless shores. Outside the shop were set two large frames filled with
+specimens of their art and skill.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh leaned in the doorway, his bold and humorous countenance wearing a look
+of interest at the unusual influx of life and sound into the street. When the
+meaning of the disturbance became clear to him he placed a hand beside his
+mouth and shouted: &ldquo;Hey! Frank!&rdquo; in such a robustious voice that
+the feeble clamour of the natives was drowned and silenced.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Fifty yards away, on the seaward side of the street, stood the abode of the
+consul for the United States. Out from the door of this building tumbled
+Goodwin at the call. He had been smoking with Willard Geddie, the consul, on
+the back porch of the consulate, which was conceded to be the coolest spot in
+Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Hurry up,&rdquo; shouted Keogh. &ldquo;There&rsquo;s a riot in town on
+account of a telegram that&rsquo;s come for you. You want to be careful about
+these things, my boy. It won&rsquo;t do to trifle with the feelings of the
+public this way. You&rsquo;ll be getting a pink note some day with violet scent
+on it; and then the country&rsquo;ll be steeped in the throes of a
+revolution.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin had strolled up the street and met the boy with the message. The
+ox-eyed women gazed at him with shy admiration, for his type drew them. He was
+big, blonde, and jauntily dressed in white linen, with buckskin <i>zapatos</i>.
+His manner was courtly, with a sort of kindly truculence in it, tempered by a
+merciful eye. When the telegram had been delivered, and the bearer of it
+dismissed with a gratuity, the relieved populace returned to the contiguities
+of shade from which curiosity had drawn it&mdash;the women to their baking in
+the mud ovens under the orange-trees, or to the interminable combing of their
+long, straight hair; the men to their cigarettes and gossip in the cantinas.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin sat on Keogh&rsquo;s doorstep, and read his telegram. It was from Bob
+Englehart, an American, who lived in San Mateo, the capital city of Anchuria,
+eighty miles in the interior. Englehart was a gold miner, an ardent
+revolutionist and &ldquo;good people.&rdquo; That he was a man of resource and
+imagination was proven by the telegram he had sent. It had been his task to
+send a confidential message to his friend in Coralio. This could not have been
+accomplished in either Spanish or English, for the eye politic in Anchuria was
+an active one. The Ins and the Outs were perpetually on their guard. But
+Englehart was a diplomatist. There existed but one code upon which he might
+make requisition with promise of safety&mdash;the great and potent code of
+Slang. So, here is the message that slipped, unconstrued, through the fingers
+of curious officials, and came to the eye of Goodwin:
+</p>
+
+<p class="letter">
+His Nibs skedaddled yesterday per jack-rabbit line with all the coin in the
+kitty and the bundle of muslin he&rsquo;s spoony about. The boodle is six
+figures short. Our crowd in good shape, but we need the spondulicks. You collar
+it. The main guy and the dry goods are headed for the briny. You know what to
+do.
+</p>
+
+<p class="right">
+B<small>OB</small>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This screed, remarkable as it was, had no mystery for Goodwin. He was the most
+successful of the small advance-guard of speculative Americans that had invaded
+Anchuria, and he had not reached that enviable pinnacle without having well
+exercised the arts of foresight and deduction. He had taken up political
+intrigue as a matter of business. He was acute enough to wield a certain
+influence among the leading schemers, and he was prosperous enough to be able
+to purchase the respect of the petty office-holders. There was always a
+revolutionary party; and to it he had always allied himself; for the adherents
+of a new administration received the rewards of their labours. There was now a
+Liberal party seeking to overturn President Miraflores. If the wheel
+successfully revolved, Goodwin stood to win a concession to 30,000 manzanas of
+the finest coffee lands in the interior. Certain incidents in the recent career
+of President Miraflores had excited a shrewd suspicion in Goodwin&rsquo;s mind
+that the government was near a dissolution from another cause than that of a
+revolution, and now Englehart&rsquo;s telegram had come as a corroboration of
+his wisdom.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The telegram, which had remained unintelligible to the Anchurian linguists who
+had applied to it in vain their knowledge of Spanish and elemental English,
+conveyed a stimulating piece of news to Goodwin&rsquo;s understanding. It
+informed him that the president of the republic had decamped from the capital
+city with the contents of the treasury. Furthermore, that he was accompanied in
+his flight by that winning adventuress Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer, whose
+troupe of performers had been entertained by the president at San Mateo during
+the past month on a scale less modest than that with which royal visitors are
+often content. The reference to the &ldquo;jack-rabbit line&rdquo; could mean
+nothing else than the mule-back system of transport that prevailed between
+Coralio and the capital. The hint that the &ldquo;boodle&rdquo; was &ldquo;six
+figures short&rdquo; made the condition of the national treasury lamentably
+clear. Also it was convincingly true that the ingoing party&mdash;its way now
+made a pacific one&mdash;would need the &ldquo;spondulicks.&rdquo; Unless its
+pledges should be fulfilled, and the spoils held for the delectation of the
+victors, precarious indeed, would be the position of the new government.
+Therefore it was exceeding necessary to &ldquo;collar the main guy,&rdquo; and
+recapture the sinews of war and government.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin handed the message to Keogh.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Read that, Billy,&rdquo; he said. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s from Bob Englehart.
+Can you manage the cipher?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh sat in the other half of the doorway, and carefully perused the telegram.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Tis not a cipher,&rdquo; he said, finally. &ldquo;&rsquo;Tis what
+they call literature, and that&rsquo;s a system of language put in the mouths
+of people that they&rsquo;ve never been introduced to by writers of
+imagination. The magazines invented it, but I never knew before that President
+Norvin Green had stamped it with the seal of his approval. &rsquo;Tis now no
+longer literature, but language. The dictionaries tried, but they
+couldn&rsquo;t make it go for anything but dialect. Sure, now that the Western
+Union indorses it, it won&rsquo;t be long till a race of people will spring up
+that speaks it.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You&rsquo;re running too much to philology, Billy,&rdquo; said Goodwin.
+&ldquo;Do you make out the meaning of it?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Sure,&rdquo; replied the philosopher of Fortune. &ldquo;All languages
+come easy to the man who must know &rsquo;em. I&rsquo;ve even failed to
+misunderstand an order to evacuate in classical Chinese when it was backed up
+by the muzzle of a breech-loader. This little literary essay I hold in my hands
+means a game of Fox-in-the-Morning. Ever play that, Frank, when you was a
+kid?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I think so,&rdquo; said Goodwin, laughing. &ldquo;You join hands all
+&rsquo;round, and&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You do not,&rdquo; interrupted Keogh. &ldquo;You&rsquo;ve got a fine
+sporting game mixed up in your head with &lsquo;All Around the Rosebush.&rsquo;
+The spirit of &lsquo;Fox-in-the-Morning&rsquo; is opposed to the holding of
+hands. I&rsquo;ll tell you how it&rsquo;s played. This president man and his
+companion in play, they stand up over in San Mateo, ready for the run, and
+shout: &lsquo;Fox-in-the-Morning!&rsquo; Me and you, standing here, we say:
+&lsquo;Goose and the Gander!&rsquo; They say: &lsquo;How many miles is it to
+London town?&rsquo; We say: &lsquo;Only a few, if your legs are long enough.
+How many comes out?&rsquo; They say: &lsquo;More than you&rsquo;re able to
+catch.&rsquo; And then the game commences.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I catch the idea,&rdquo; said Goodwin. &ldquo;It won&rsquo;t do to let
+the goose and gander slip through our fingers, Billy; their feathers are too
+valuable. Our crowd is prepared and able to step into the shoes of the
+government at once; but with the treasury empty we&rsquo;d stay in power about
+as long as a tenderfoot would stick on an untamed bronco. We must play the fox
+on every foot of the coast to prevent their getting out of the country.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;By the mule-back schedule,&rdquo; said Keogh, &ldquo;it&rsquo;s five
+days down from San Mateo. We&rsquo;ve got plenty of time to set our outposts.
+There&rsquo;s only three places on the coast where they can hope to sail
+from&mdash;here and Solitas and Alazan. They&rsquo;re the only points
+we&rsquo;ll have to guard. It&rsquo;s as easy as a chess problem&mdash;fox to
+play, and mate in three moves. Oh, goosey, goosey, gander, whither do you
+wander? By the blessing of the literary telegraph the boodle of this benighted
+fatherland shall be preserved to the honest political party that is seeking to
+overthrow it.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The situation had been justly outlined by Keogh. The down trail from the
+capital was at all times a weary road to travel. A jiggety-joggety journey it
+was; ice-cold and hot, wet and dry. The trail climbed appalling mountains,
+wound like a rotten string about the brows of breathless precipices, plunged
+through chilling snow-fed streams, and wriggled like a snake through sunless
+forests teeming with menacing insect and animal life. After descending to the
+foothills it turned to a trident, the central prong ending at Alazan. Another
+branched off to Coralio; the third penetrated to Solitas. Between the sea and
+the foothills stretched the five miles breadth of alluvial coast. Here was the
+flora of the tropics in its rankest and most prodigal growth. Spaces here and
+there had been wrested from the jungle and planted with bananas and cane and
+orange groves. The rest was a riot of wild vegetation, the home of monkeys,
+tapirs, jaguars, alligators and prodigious reptiles and insects. Where no road
+was cut a serpent could scarcely make its way through the tangle of vines and
+creepers. Across the treacherous mangrove swamps few things without wings could
+safely pass. Therefore the fugitives could hope to reach the coast only by one
+of the routes named.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Keep the matter quiet, Billy,&rdquo; advised Goodwin. &ldquo;We
+don&rsquo;t want the Ins to know that the president is in flight. I suppose
+Bob&rsquo;s information is something of a scoop in the capital as yet.
+Otherwise he would not have tried to make his message a confidential one; and
+besides, everybody would have heard the news. I&rsquo;m going around now to see
+Dr. Zavalla, and start a man up the trail to cut the telegraph wire.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As Goodwin rose, Keogh threw his hat upon the grass by the door and expelled a
+tremendous sigh.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What&rsquo;s the trouble, Billy?&rdquo; asked Goodwin, pausing.
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s the first time I ever heard you sigh.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Tis the last,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;With that sorrowful puff
+of wind I resign myself to a life of praiseworthy but harassing honesty. What
+are tintypes, if you please, to the opportunities of the great and hilarious
+class of ganders and geese? Not that I would be a president, Frank&mdash;and
+the boodle he&rsquo;s got is too big for me to handle&mdash;but in some ways I
+feel my conscience hurting me for addicting myself to photographing a nation
+instead of running away with it. Frank, did you ever see the &lsquo;bundle of
+muslin&rsquo; that His Excellency has wrapped up and carried off?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Isabel Guilbert?&rdquo; said Goodwin, laughing. &ldquo;No, I never did.
+From what I&rsquo;ve heard of her, though, I imagine that she wouldn&rsquo;t
+stick at anything to carry her point. Don&rsquo;t get romantic, Billy.
+Sometimes I begin to fear that there&rsquo;s Irish blood in your
+ancestry.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I never saw her either,&rdquo; went on Keogh; &ldquo;but they say
+she&rsquo;s got all the ladies of mythology, sculpture, and fiction reduced to
+chromos. They say she can look at a man once, and he&rsquo;ll turn monkey and
+climb trees to pick cocoanuts for her. Think of that president man with Lord
+knows how many hundreds of thousands of dollars in one hand, and this muslin
+siren in the other, galloping down hill on a sympathetic mule amid songbirds
+and flowers! And here is Billy Keogh, because he is virtuous, condemned to the
+unprofitable swindle of slandering the faces of missing links on tin for an
+honest living! &rsquo;Tis an injustice of nature.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Cheer up,&rdquo; said Goodwin. &ldquo;You are a pretty poor fox to be
+envying a gander. Maybe the enchanting Guilbert will take a fancy to you and
+your tintypes after we impoverish her royal escort.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;She could do worse,&rdquo; reflected Keogh; &ldquo;but she won&rsquo;t.
+&rsquo;Tis not a tintype gallery, but the gallery of the gods that she&rsquo;s
+fitted to adorn. She&rsquo;s a very wicked lady, and the president man is in
+luck. But I hear Clancy swearing in the back room for having to do all the
+work.&rdquo; And Keogh plunged for the rear of the &ldquo;gallery,&rdquo;
+whistling gaily in a spontaneous way that belied his recent sigh over the
+questionable good luck of the flying president.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin turned from the main street into a much narrower one that intersected
+it at a right angle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+These side streets were covered by a growth of thick, rank grass, which was
+kept to a navigable shortness by the machetes of the police. Stone sidewalks,
+little more than a ledge in width, ran along the base of the mean and
+monotonous adobe houses. At the outskirts of the village these streets dwindled
+to nothing; and here were set the palm-thatched huts of the Caribs and the
+poorer natives, and the shabby cabins of negroes from Jamaica and the West
+India islands. A few structures raised their heads above the red-tiled roofs of
+the one-story houses&mdash;the bell tower of the <i>Calaboza</i>, the Hotel de
+los Estranjeros, the residence of the Vesuvius Fruit Company&rsquo;s agent, the
+store and residence of Bernard Brannigan, a ruined cathedral in which Columbus
+had once set foot, and, most imposing of all, the Casa Morena&mdash;the summer
+&ldquo;White House&rdquo; of the President of Anchuria. On the principal street
+running along the beach&mdash;the Broadway of Coralio&mdash;were the larger
+stores, the government <i>bodega</i> and post-office, the <i>cuartel</i>, the
+rum-shops and the market place.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On his way Goodwin passed the house of Bernard Brannigan. It was a modern
+wooden building, two stories in height. The ground floor was occupied by
+Brannigan&rsquo;s store, the upper one contained the living apartments. A wide
+cool porch ran around the house half way up its outer walls. A handsome,
+vivacious girl neatly dressed in flowing white leaned over the railing and
+smiled down upon Goodwin. She was no darker than many an Andalusian of high
+descent; and she sparkled and glowed like a tropical moonlight.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Good evening, Miss Paula,&rdquo; said Goodwin, taking off his hat, with
+his ready smile. There was little difference in his manner whether he addressed
+women or men. Everybody in Coralio liked to receive the salutation of the big
+American.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Is there any news, Mr. Goodwin? Please don&rsquo;t say no. Isn&rsquo;t
+it warm? I feel just like Mariana in her moated grange&mdash;or was it a
+range?&mdash;it&rsquo;s hot enough.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;No, there&rsquo;s no news to tell, I believe,&rdquo; said Goodwin, with
+a mischievous look in his eye, &ldquo;except that old Geddie is getting
+grumpier and crosser every day. If something doesn&rsquo;t happen to relieve
+his mind I&rsquo;ll have to quit smoking on his back porch&mdash;and
+there&rsquo;s no other place available that is cool enough.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;He isn&rsquo;t grumpy,&rdquo; said Paula Brannigan, impulsively,
+&ldquo;when he&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But she ceased suddenly, and drew back with a deepening colour; for her mother
+had been a <i>mestizo</i> lady, and the Spanish blood had brought to Paula a
+certain shyness that was an adornment to the other half of her demonstrative
+nature.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap02"></a>II<br/>
+THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE</h2>
+
+<p>
+Willard Geddie, consul for the United States in Coralio, was working leisurely
+on his yearly report. Goodwin, who had strolled in as he did daily for a smoke
+on the much coveted porch, had found him so absorbed in his work that he
+departed after roundly abusing the consul for his lack of hospitality.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I shall complain to the civil service department,&rdquo; said
+Goodwin;&mdash;&ldquo;or is it a department?&mdash;perhaps it&rsquo;s only a
+theory. One gets neither civility nor service from you. You won&rsquo;t talk;
+and you won&rsquo;t set out anything to drink. What kind of a way is that of
+representing your government?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin strolled out and across to the hotel to see if he could bully the
+quarantine doctor into a game on Coralio&rsquo;s solitary billiard table. His
+plans were completed for the interception of the fugitives from the capital;
+and now it was but a waiting game that he had to play.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The consul was interested in his report. He was only twenty-four; and he had
+not been in Coralio long enough for his enthusiasm to cool in the heat of the
+tropics&mdash;a paradox that may be allowed between Cancer and Capricorn.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So many thousand bunches of bananas, so many thousand oranges and cocoanuts, so
+many ounces of gold dust, pounds of rubber, coffee, indigo and
+sarsaparilla&mdash;actually, exports were twenty per cent. greater than for the
+previous year!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A little thrill of satisfaction ran through the consul. Perhaps, he thought,
+the State Department, upon reading his introduction, would notice&mdash;and
+then he leaned back in his chair and laughed. He was getting as bad as the
+others. For the moment he had forgotten that Coralio was an insignificant town
+in an insignificant republic lying along the by-ways of a second-rate sea. He
+thought of Gregg, the quarantine doctor, who subscribed for the London
+<i>Lancet</i>, expecting to find it quoting his reports to the home Board of
+Health concerning the yellow fever germ. The consul knew that not one in fifty
+of his acquaintances in the States had ever heard of Coralio. He knew that two
+men, at any rate, would have to read his report&mdash;some underling in the
+State Department and a compositor in the Public Printing Office. Perhaps the
+typesticker would note the increase of commerce in Coralio, and speak of it,
+over the cheese and beer, to a friend.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He had just written: &ldquo;Most unaccountable is the supineness of the large
+exporters in the United States in permitting the French and German houses to
+practically control the trade interests of this rich and productive
+country&rdquo;&mdash;when he heard the hoarse notes of a steamer&rsquo;s siren.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie laid down his pen and gathered his Panama hat and umbrella. By the sound
+he knew it to be the <i>Valhalla</i>, one of the line of fruit vessels plying
+for the Vesuvius Company. Down to <i>niños</i> of five years, everyone in
+Coralio could name you each incoming steamer by the note of her siren.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The consul sauntered by a roundabout, shaded way to the beach. By reason of
+long practice he gauged his stroll so accurately that by the time he arrived on
+the sandy shore the boat of the customs officials was rowing back from the
+steamer, which had been boarded and inspected according to the laws of
+Anchuria.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There is no harbour at Coralio. Vessels of the draught of the <i>Valhalla</i>
+must ride at anchor a mile from shore. When they take on fruit it is conveyed
+on lighters and freighter sloops. At Solitas, where there was a fine harbour,
+ships of many kinds were to be seen, but in the roadstead off Coralio scarcely
+any save the fruiters paused. Now and then a tramp coaster, or a mysterious
+brig from Spain, or a saucy French barque would hang innocently for a few days
+in the offing. Then the custom-house crew would become doubly vigilant and
+wary. At night a sloop or two would be making strange trips in and out along
+the shore; and in the morning the stock of Three-Star Hennessey, wines and
+drygoods in Coralio would be found vastly increased. It has also been said that
+the customs officials jingled more silver in the pockets of their red-striped
+trousers, and that the record books showed no increase in import duties
+received.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The customs boat and the <i>Valhalla</i> gig reached the shore at the same
+time. When they grounded in the shallow water there was still five yards of
+rolling surf between them and dry sand. Then half-clothed Caribs dashed into
+the water, and brought in on their backs the <i>Valhalla&rsquo;s</i> purser and
+the little native officials in their cotton undershirts, blue trousers with red
+stripes, and flapping straw hats.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At college Geddie had been a treasure as a first-baseman. He now closed his
+umbrella, stuck it upright in the sand, and stooped, with his hands resting
+upon his knees. The purser, burlesquing the pitcher&rsquo;s contortions, hurled
+at the consul the heavy roll of newspapers, tied with a string, that the
+steamer always brought for him. Geddie leaped high and caught the roll with a
+sounding &ldquo;thwack.&rdquo; The loungers on the beach&mdash;about a third of
+the population of the town&mdash;laughed and applauded delightedly. Every week
+they expected to see that roll of papers delivered and received in that same
+manner, and they were never disappointed. Innovations did not flourish in
+Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The consul re-hoisted his umbrella and walked back to the consulate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This home of a great nation&rsquo;s representative was a wooden structure of
+two rooms, with a native-built gallery of poles, bamboo and nipa palm running
+on three sides of it. One room was the official apartment, furnished chastely
+with a flat-top desk, a hammock, and three uncomfortable cane-seated chairs.
+Engravings of the first and latest president of the country represented hung
+against the wall. The other room was the consul&rsquo;s living apartment.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was eleven o&rsquo;clock when he returned from the beach, and therefore
+breakfast time. Chanca, the Carib woman who cooked for him, was just serving
+the meal on the side of the gallery facing the sea&mdash;a spot famous as the
+coolest in Coralio. The breakfast consisted of shark&rsquo;s fin soup, stew of
+land crabs, breadfruit, a boiled iguana steak, aguacates, a freshly cut
+pineapple, claret and coffee.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie took his seat, and unrolled with luxurious laziness his bundle of
+newspapers. Here in Coralio for two days or longer he would read of goings-on
+in the world very much as we of the world read those whimsical contributions to
+inexact science that assume to portray the doings of the Martians. After he had
+finished with the papers they would be sent on the rounds of the other
+English-speaking residents of the town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The paper that came first to his hand was one of those bulky mattresses of
+printed stuff upon which the readers of certain New York journals are supposed
+to take their Sabbath literary nap. Opening this the consul rested it upon the
+table, supporting its weight with the aid of the back of a chair. Then he
+partook of his meal deliberately, turning the leaves from time to time and
+glancing half idly at the contents.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Presently he was struck by something familiar to him in a picture&mdash;a
+half-page, badly printed reproduction of a photograph of a vessel. Languidly
+interested, he leaned for a nearer scrutiny and a view of the florid headlines
+of the column next to the picture.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Yes; he was not mistaken. The engraving was of the eight-hundred-ton yacht
+<i>Idalia</i>, belonging to &ldquo;that prince of good fellows, Midas of the
+money market, and society&rsquo;s pink of perfection, J. Ward Tolliver.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Slowly sipping his black coffee, Geddie read the column of print. Following a
+listed statement of Mr. Tolliver&rsquo;s real estate and bonds, came a
+description of the yacht&rsquo;s furnishings, and then the grain of news no
+bigger than a mustard seed. Mr. Tolliver, with a party of favoured guests,
+would sail the next day on a six weeks&rsquo; cruise along the Central American
+and South American coasts and among the Bahama Islands. Among the guests were
+Mrs. Cumberland Payne and Miss Ida Payne, of Norfolk.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The writer, with the fatuous presumption that was demanded of him by his
+readers, had concocted a romance suited to their palates. He bracketed the
+names of Miss Payne and Mr. Tolliver until he had well-nigh read the marriage
+ceremony over them. He played coyly and insinuatingly upon the strings of
+&ldquo;<i>on dit</i>&rdquo; and &ldquo;Madame Rumour&rdquo; and &ldquo;a little
+bird&rdquo; and &ldquo;no one would be surprised,&rdquo; and ended with
+congratulations.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie, having finished his breakfast, took his papers to the edge of the
+gallery, and sat there in his favourite steamer chair with his feet on the
+bamboo railing. He lighted a cigar, and looked out upon the sea. He felt a glow
+of satisfaction at finding he was so little disturbed by what he had read. He
+told himself that he had conquered the distress that had sent him, a voluntary
+exile, to this far land of the lotus. He could never forget Ida, of course; but
+there was no longer any pain in thinking about her. When they had had that
+misunderstanding and quarrel he had impulsively sought this consulship, with
+the desire to retaliate upon her by detaching himself from her world and
+presence. He had succeeded thoroughly in that. During the twelve months of his
+life in Coralio no word had passed between them, though he had sometimes heard
+of her through the dilatory correspondence with the few friends to whom he
+still wrote. Still he could not repress a little thrill of satisfaction at
+knowing that she had not yet married Tolliver or anyone else. But evidently
+Tolliver had not yet abandoned hope.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Well, it made no difference to him now. He had eaten of the lotus. He was happy
+and content in this land of perpetual afternoon. Those old days of life in the
+States seemed like an irritating dream. He hoped Ida would be as happy as he
+was. The climate as balmy as that of distant Avalon; the fetterless, idyllic
+round of enchanted days; the life among this indolent, romantic people&mdash;a
+life full of music, flowers, and low laughter; the influence of the imminent
+sea and mountains, and the many shapes of love and magic and beauty that
+bloomed in the white tropic nights&mdash;with all he was more than content.
+Also, there was Paula Brannigan.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie intended to marry Paula&mdash;if, of course, she would consent; but he
+felt rather sure that she would do that. Somehow, he kept postponing his
+proposal. Several times he had been quite near to it; but a mysterious
+something always held him back. Perhaps it was only the unconscious,
+instinctive conviction that the act would sever the last tie that bound him to
+his old world.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He could be very happy with Paula. Few of the native girls could be compared
+with her. She had attended a convent school in New Orleans for two years; and
+when she chose to display her accomplishments no one could detect any
+difference between her and the girls of Norfolk and Manhattan. But it was
+delicious to see her at home dressed, as she sometimes was, in the native
+costume, with bare shoulders and flowing sleeves.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Bernard Brannigan was the great merchant of Coralio. Besides his store, he
+maintained a train of pack mules, and carried on a lively trade with the
+interior towns and villages. He had married a native lady of high Castilian
+descent, but with a tinge of Indian brown showing through her olive cheek. The
+union of the Irish and the Spanish had produced, as it so often has, an
+offshoot of rare beauty and variety. They were very excellent people indeed,
+and the upper story of their house was ready to be placed at the service of
+Geddie and Paula as soon as he should make up his mind to speak about it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By the time two hours were whiled away the consul tired of reading. The papers
+lay scattered about him on the gallery. Reclining there, he gazed dreamily out
+upon an Eden. A clump of banana plants interposed their broad shields between
+him and the sun. The gentle slope from the consulate to the sea was covered
+with the dark-green foliage of lemon-trees and orange-trees just bursting into
+bloom. A lagoon pierced the land like a dark, jagged crystal, and above it a
+pale ceiba-tree rose almost to the clouds. The waving cocoanut palms on the
+beach flared their decorative green leaves against the slate of an almost
+quiescent sea. His senses were cognizant of brilliant scarlet and ochres amid
+the vert of the coppice, of odours of fruit and bloom and the smoke from
+Chanca&rsquo;s clay oven under the calabash-tree; of the treble laughter of the
+native women in their huts, the song of the robin, the salt taste of the
+breeze, the diminuendo of the faint surf running along the shore&mdash;and,
+gradually, of a white speck, growing to a blur, that intruded itself upon the
+drab prospect of the sea.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Lazily interested, he watched this blur increase until it became the
+<i>Idalia</i> steaming at full speed, coming down the coast. Without changing
+his position he kept his eyes upon the beautiful white yacht as she drew
+swiftly near, and came opposite to Coralio. Then, sitting upright, he saw her
+float steadily past and on. Scarcely a mile of sea had separated her from the
+shore. He had seen the frequent flash of her polished brass work and the
+stripes of her deck-awnings&mdash;so much, and no more. Like a ship on a magic
+lantern slide the <i>Idalia</i> had crossed the illuminated circle of the
+consul&rsquo;s little world, and was gone. Save for the tiny cloud of smoke
+that was left hanging over the brim of the sea, she might have been an
+immaterial thing, a chimera of his idle brain.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie went into his office and sat down to dawdle over his report. If the
+reading of the article in the paper had left him unshaken, this silent passing
+of the <i>Idalia</i> had done for him still more. It had brought the calm and
+peace of a situation from which all uncertainty had been erased. He knew that
+men sometimes hope without being aware of it. Now, since she had come two
+thousand miles and had passed without a sign, not even his unconscious self
+need cling to the past any longer.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After dinner, when the sun was low behind the mountains, Geddie walked on the
+little strip of beach under the cocoanuts. The wind was blowing mildly
+landward, and the surface of the sea was rippled by tiny wavelets.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A miniature breaker, spreading with a soft &ldquo;swish&rdquo; upon the sand
+brought with it something round and shiny that rolled back again as the wave
+receded. The next influx beached it clear, and Geddie picked it up. The thing
+was a long-necked wine bottle of colourless glass. The cork had been driven in
+tightly to the level of the mouth, and the end covered with dark-red
+sealing-wax. The bottle contained only what seemed to be a sheet of paper, much
+curled from the manipulation it had undergone while being inserted. In the
+sealing-wax was the impression of a seal&mdash;probably of a signet-ring,
+bearing the initials of a monogram; but the impression had been hastily made,
+and the letters were past anything more certain than a shrewd conjecture. Ida
+Payne had always worn a signet-ring in preference to any other finger
+decoration. Geddie thought he could make out the familiar &ldquo;I P&rdquo;;
+and a queer sensation of disquietude went over him. More personal and intimate
+was this reminder of her than had been the sight of the vessel she was
+doubtless on. He walked back to his house, and set the bottle on his desk.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Throwing off his hat and coat, and lighting a lamp&mdash;for the night had
+crowded precipitately upon the brief twilight&mdash;he began to examine his
+piece of sea salvage.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By holding the bottle near the light and turning it judiciously, he made out
+that it contained a double sheet of note-paper filled with close writing;
+further, that the paper was of the same size and shade as that always used by
+Ida; and that, to the best of his belief, the handwriting was hers. The
+imperfect glass of the bottle so distorted the rays of light that he could read
+no word of the writing; but certain capital letters, of which he caught
+comprehensive glimpses, were Ida&rsquo;s, he felt sure.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was a little smile both of perplexity and amusement in Geddie&rsquo;s
+eyes as he set the bottle down, and laid three cigars side by side on his desk.
+He fetched his steamer chair from the gallery, and stretched himself
+comfortably. He would smoke those three cigars while considering the problem.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For it amounted to a problem. He almost wished that he had not found the
+bottle; but the bottle was there. Why should it have drifted in from the sea,
+whence come so many disquieting things, to disturb his peace?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In this dreamy land, where time seemed so redundant, he had fallen into the
+habit of bestowing much thought upon even trifling matters.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He began to speculate upon many fanciful theories concerning the story of the
+bottle, rejecting each in turn.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Ships in danger of wreck or disablement sometimes cast forth such precarious
+messengers calling for aid. But he had seen the <i>Idalia</i> not three hours
+before, safe and speeding. Suppose the crew had mutinied and imprisoned the
+passengers below, and the message was one begging for succour! But, premising
+such an improbable outrage, would the agitated captives have taken the pains to
+fill four pages of note-paper with carefully penned arguments to their rescue.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Thus by elimination he soon rid the matter of the more unlikely theories, and
+was reduced&mdash;though aversely&mdash;to the less assailable one that the
+bottle contained a message to himself. Ida knew he was in Coralio; she must
+have launched the bottle while the yacht was passing and the wind blowing
+fairly toward the shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As soon as Geddie reached this conclusion a wrinkle came between his brows and
+a stubborn look settled around his mouth. He sat looking out through the
+doorway at the gigantic fire-flies traversing the quiet streets.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+If this was a message to him from Ida, what could it mean save an overture
+toward a reconciliation? And if that, why had she not used the same methods of
+the post instead of this uncertain and even flippant means of communication? A
+note in an empty bottle, cast into the sea! There was something light and
+frivolous about it, if not actually contemptuous.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The thought stirred his pride and subdued whatever emotions had been
+resurrected by the finding of the bottle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie put on his coat and hat and walked out. He followed a street that led
+him along the border of the little plaza where a band was playing and people
+were rambling, care-free and indolent. Some timorous <i>señoritas</i> scurrying
+past with fire-flies tangled in the jetty braids of their hair glanced at him
+with shy, flattering eyes. The air was languorous with the scent of jasmin and
+orange-blossoms.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The consul stayed his steps at the house of Bernard Brannigan. Paula was
+swinging in a hammock on the gallery. She rose from it like a bird from its
+nest. The colour came to her cheek at the sound of Geddie&rsquo;s voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was charmed at the sight of her costume&mdash;a flounced muslin dress, with
+a little jacket of white flannel, all made with neatness and style. He
+suggested a stroll, and they walked out to the old Indian well on the hill
+road. They sat on the curb, and there Geddie made the expected but
+long-deferred speech. Certain though he had been that she would not say him
+nay, he was thrilled with joy at the completeness and sweetness of her
+surrender. Here was surely a heart made for love and steadfastness. Here was no
+caprice or questionings or captious standards of convention.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When Geddie kissed Paula at her door that night he was happier than he had ever
+been before. &ldquo;Here in this hollow lotus land, ever to live and lie
+reclined&rdquo; seemed to him, as it has seemed to many mariners, the best as
+well as the easiest. His future would be an ideal one. He had attained a
+Paradise without a serpent. His Eve would be indeed a part of him, unbeguiled,
+and therefore more beguiling. He had made his decision to-night, and his heart
+was full of serene, assured content.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie went back to his house whistling that finest and saddest love song,
+&ldquo;La Golondrina.&rdquo; At the door his tame monkey leaped down from his
+shelf, chattering briskly. The consul turned to his desk to get him some nuts
+he usually kept there. Reaching in the half-darkness, his hand struck against
+the bottle. He started as if he had touched the cold rotundity of a serpent.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He had forgotten that the bottle was there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He lighted the lamp and fed the monkey. Then, very deliberately, he lighted a
+cigar, and took the bottle in his hand, and walked down the path to the beach.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was a moon, and the sea was glorious. The breeze had shifted, as it did
+each evening, and was now rushing steadily seaward.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Stepping to the water&rsquo;s edge, Geddie hurled the unopened bottle far out
+into the sea. It disappeared for a moment, and then shot upward twice its
+length. Geddie stood still, watching it. The moonlight was so bright that he
+could see it bobbing up and down with the little waves. Slowly it receded from
+the shore, flashing and turning as it went. The wind was carrying it out to
+sea. Soon it became a mere speck, doubtfully discerned at irregular intervals;
+and then the mystery of it was swallowed up by the greater mystery of the
+ocean. Geddie stood still upon the beach, smoking and looking out upon the
+water.
+</p>
+
+<p class="p2">
+&ldquo;Simon!&mdash;Oh, Simon!&mdash;wake up there, Simon!&rdquo; bawled a
+sonorous voice at the edge of the water.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Old Simon Cruz was a half-breed fisherman and smuggler who lived in a hut on
+the beach. Out of his earliest nap Simon was thus awakened.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He slipped on his shoes and went outside. Just landing from one of the
+<i>Valhalla&rsquo;s</i> boats was the third mate of that vessel, who was an
+acquaintance of Simon&rsquo;s, and three sailors from the fruiter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Go up, Simon,&rdquo; called the mate, &ldquo;and find Dr. Gregg or Mr.
+Goodwin or anybody that&rsquo;s a friend to Mr. Geddie, and bring &rsquo;em
+here at once.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Saints of the skies!&rdquo; said Simon, sleepily, &ldquo;nothing has
+happened to Mr. Geddie?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;He&rsquo;s under that tarpauling,&rdquo; said the mate, pointing to the
+boat, &ldquo;and he&rsquo;s rather more than half drownded. We seen him from
+the steamer nearly a mile out from shore, swimmin&rsquo; like mad after a
+bottle that was floatin&rsquo; in the water, outward bound. We lowered the gig
+and started for him. He nearly had his hand on the bottle, when he gave out and
+went under. We pulled him out in time to save him, maybe; but the doctor is the
+one to decide that.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;A bottle?&rdquo; said the old man, rubbing his eyes. He was not yet
+fully awake. &ldquo;Where is the bottle?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Driftin&rsquo; along out there some&rsquo;eres,&rdquo; said the mate,
+jerking his thumb toward the sea. &ldquo;Get on with you, Simon.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap03"></a>III<br/>
+SMITH</h2>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin and the ardent patriot, Zavalla, took all the precautions that their
+foresight could contrive to prevent the escape of President Miraflores and his
+companion. They sent trusted messengers up the coast to Solitas and Alazan to
+warn the local leaders of the flight, and to instruct them to patrol the water
+line and arrest the fugitives at all hazards should they reveal themselves in
+that territory. After this was done there remained only to cover the district
+about Coralio and await the coming of the quarry. The nets were well spread.
+The roads were so few, the opportunities for embarkation so limited, and the
+two or three probable points of exit so well guarded that it would be strange
+indeed if there should slip through the meshes so much of the country&rsquo;s
+dignity, romance, and collateral. The president would, without doubt, move as
+secretly as possible, and endeavour to board a vessel by stealth from some
+secluded point along the shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On the fourth day after the receipt of Englehart&rsquo;s telegram the
+<i>Karlsefin</i>, a Norwegian steamer chartered by the New Orleans fruit trade,
+anchored off Coralio with three hoarse toots of her siren. The <i>Karlsefin</i>
+was not one of the line operated by the Vesuvius Fruit Company. She was
+something of a dilettante, doing odd jobs for a company that was scarcely
+important enough to figure as a rival to the Vesuvius. The movements of the
+<i>Karlsefin</i> were dependent upon the state of the market. Sometimes she
+would ply steadily between the Spanish Main and New Orleans in the regular
+transport of fruit; next she would be making erratic trips to Mobile or
+Charleston, or even as far north as New York, according to the distribution of
+the fruit supply.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin lounged upon the beach with the usual crowd of idlers that had gathered
+to view the steamer. Now that President Miraflores might be expected to reach
+the borders of his abjured country at any time, the orders were to keep a
+strict and unrelenting watch. Every vessel that approached the shores might now
+be considered a possible means of escape for the fugitives; and an eye was kept
+even on the sloops and dories that belonged to the sea-going contingent of
+Coralio. Goodwin and Zavalla moved everywhere, but without ostentation,
+watching the loopholes of escape.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The customs officials crowded importantly into their boat and rowed out to the
+<i>Karlsefin</i>. A boat from the steamer landed her purser with his papers,
+and took out the quarantine doctor with his green umbrella and clinical
+thermometer. Next a swarm of Caribs began to load upon lighters the thousands
+of bunches of bananas heaped upon the shore and row them out to the steamer.
+The <i>Karlsefin</i> had no passenger list, and was soon done with the
+attention of the authorities. The purser declared that the steamer would remain
+at anchor until morning, taking on her fruit during the night. The
+<i>Karlsefin</i> had come, he said, from New York, to which port her latest
+load of oranges and cocoanuts had been conveyed. Two or three of the freighter
+sloops were engaged to assist in the work, for the captain was anxious to make
+a quick return in order to reap the advantage offered by a certain dearth of
+fruit in the States.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+About four o&rsquo;clock in the afternoon another of those marine monsters, not
+very familiar in those waters, hove in sight, following the fateful
+<i>Idalia</i>&mdash;a graceful steam yacht, painted a light buff, clean-cut as
+a steel engraving. The beautiful vessel hovered off shore, see-sawing the waves
+as lightly as a duck in a rain barrel. A swift boat manned by a crew in uniform
+came ashore, and a stocky-built man leaped to the sands.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The new-comer seemed to turn a disapproving eye upon the rather motley
+congregation of native Anchurians, and made his way at once toward Goodwin, who
+was the most conspicuously Anglo-Saxon figure present. Goodwin greeted him with
+courtesy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Conversation developed that the newly landed one was named Smith, and that he
+had come in a yacht. A meagre biography, truly; for the yacht was most
+apparent; and the &ldquo;Smith&rdquo; not beyond a reasonable guess before the
+revelation. Yet to the eye of Goodwin, who had seen several things, there was a
+discrepancy between Smith and his yacht. A bullet-headed man Smith was, with an
+oblique, dead eye and the moustache of a cocktail-mixer. And unless he had
+shifted costumes before putting off for shore he had affronted the deck of his
+correct vessel clad in a pearl-gray derby, a gay plaid suit and vaudeville
+neckwear. Men owning pleasure yachts generally harmonize better with them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Smith looked business, but he was no advertiser. He commented upon the scenery,
+remarking upon its fidelity to the pictures in the geography; and then inquired
+for the United States consul. Goodwin pointed out the starred-and-striped
+bunting hanging above the little consulate, which was concealed behind the
+orange-trees.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Mr. Geddie, the consul, will be sure to be there,&rdquo; said Goodwin.
+&ldquo;He was very nearly drowned a few days ago while taking a swim in the
+sea, and the doctor has ordered him to remain indoors for some time.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Smith plowed his way through the sand to the consulate, his haberdashery
+creating violent discord against the smooth tropical blues and greens.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie was lounging in his hammock, somewhat pale of face and languid in pose.
+On that night when the <i>Valhalla&rsquo;s</i> boat had brought him ashore
+apparently drenched to death by the sea, Doctor Gregg and his other friends had
+toiled for hours to preserve the little spark of life that remained to him. The
+bottle, with its impotent message, was gone out to sea, and the problem that it
+had provoked was reduced to a simple sum in addition&mdash;one and one make
+two, by the rule of arithmetic; one by the rule of romance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There is a quaint old theory that man may have two souls&mdash;a peripheral one
+which serves ordinarily, and a central one which is stirred only at certain
+times, but then with activity and vigour. While under the domination of the
+former a man will shave, vote, pay taxes, give money to his family, buy
+subscription books and comport himself on the average plan. But let the central
+soul suddenly become dominant, and he may, in the twinkling of an eye, turn
+upon the partner of his joys with furious execration; he may change his
+politics while you could snap your fingers; he may deal out deadly insult to
+his dearest friend; he may get him, instanter, to a monastery or a dance hall;
+he may elope, or hang himself&mdash;or he may write a song or poem, or kiss his
+wife unasked, or give his funds to the search of a microbe. Then the peripheral
+soul will return; and we have our safe, sane citizen again. It is but the
+revolt of the Ego against Order; and its effect is to shake up the atoms only
+that they may settle where they belong.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie&rsquo;s revulsion had been a mild one&mdash;no more than a swim in a
+summer sea after so inglorious an object as a drifting bottle. And now he was
+himself again. Upon his desk, ready for the post, was a letter to his
+government tendering his resignation as consul, to be effective as soon as
+another could be appointed in his place. For Bernard Brannigan, who never did
+things in a half-way manner, was to take Geddie at once for a partner in his
+very profitable and various enterprises; and Paula was happily engaged in plans
+for refurnishing and decorating the upper story of the Brannigan house.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The consul rose from his hammock when he saw the conspicuous stranger in his
+door.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Keep your seat, old man,&rdquo; said the visitor, with an airy wave of
+his large hand. &ldquo;My name&rsquo;s Smith; and I&rsquo;ve come in a yacht.
+You are the consul&mdash;is that right? A big, cool guy on the beach directed
+me here. Thought I&rsquo;d pay my respects to the flag.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Sit down,&rdquo; said Geddie. &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been admiring your craft
+ever since it came in sight. Looks like a fast sailer. What&rsquo;s her
+tonnage?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Search me!&rdquo; said Smith. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t know what she weighs
+in at. But she&rsquo;s got a tidy gait. The <i>Rambler</i>&mdash;that&rsquo;s
+her name&mdash;don&rsquo;t take the dust of anything afloat. This is my first
+trip on her. I&rsquo;m taking a squint along this coast just to get an idea of
+the countries where the rubber and red pepper and revolutions come from. I had
+no idea there was so much scenery down here. Why, Central Park ain&rsquo;t in
+it with this neck of the woods. I&rsquo;m from New York. They get monkeys, and
+cocoanuts, and parrots down here&mdash;is that right?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We have them all,&rdquo; said Geddie. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m quite sure that
+our fauna and flora would take a prize over Central Park.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Maybe they would,&rdquo; admitted Smith, cheerfully. &ldquo;I
+haven&rsquo;t seen them yet. But I guess you&rsquo;ve got us skinned on the
+animal and vegetation question. You don&rsquo;t have much travel here, do
+you?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Travel?&rdquo; queried the consul. &ldquo;I suppose you mean passengers
+on the steamers. No; very few people land in Coralio. An investor now and
+then&mdash;tourists and sight-seers generally go further down the coast to one
+of the larger towns where there is a harbour.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I see a ship out there loading up with bananas,&rdquo; said Smith.
+&ldquo;Any passengers come on her?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s the <i>Karlsefin</i>,&rdquo; said the consul.
+&ldquo;She&rsquo;s a tramp fruiter&mdash;made her last trip to New York, I
+believe. No; she brought no passengers. I saw her boat come ashore, and there
+was no one. About the only exciting recreation we have here is watching
+steamers when they arrive; and a passenger on one of them generally causes the
+whole town to turn out. If you are going to remain in Coralio a while, Mr.
+Smith, I&rsquo;ll be glad to take you around to meet some people. There are
+four or five American chaps that are good to know, besides the native
+high-fliers.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Thanks,&rdquo; said the yachtsman, &ldquo;but I wouldn&rsquo;t put you
+to the trouble. I&rsquo;d like to meet the guys you speak of, but I won&rsquo;t
+be here long enough to do much knocking around. That cool gent on the beach
+spoke of a doctor; can you tell me where I could find him? The <i>Rambler</i>
+ain&rsquo;t quite as steady on her feet as a Broadway hotel; and a fellow gets
+a touch of seasickness now and then. Thought I&rsquo;d strike the croaker for a
+handful of the little sugar pills, in case I need &rsquo;em.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You will be apt to find Dr. Gregg at the hotel,&rdquo; said the consul.
+&ldquo;You can see it from the door&mdash;it&rsquo;s that two-story building
+with the balcony, where the orange-trees are.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Hotel de los Estranjeros was a dreary hostelry, in great disuse both by
+strangers and friends. It stood at a corner of the Street of the Holy
+Sepulchre. A grove of small orange-trees crowded against one side of it,
+enclosed by a low, rock wall over which a tall man might easily step. The house
+was of plastered adobe, stained a hundred shades of colour by the salt breeze
+and the sun. Upon its upper balcony opened a central door and two windows
+containing broad jalousies instead of sashes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The lower floor communicated by two doorways with the narrow, rock-paved
+sidewalk. The <i>pulperia</i>&mdash;or drinking shop&mdash;of the proprietress,
+Madama Timotea Ortiz, occupied the ground floor. On the bottles of brandy,
+<i>anisada</i>, Scotch &ldquo;smoke&rdquo; and inexpensive wines behind the
+little counter the dust lay thick save where the fingers of infrequent
+customers had left irregular prints. The upper story contained four or five
+guest-rooms which were rarely put to their destined use. Sometimes a
+fruit-grower, riding in from his plantation to confer with his agent, would
+pass a melancholy night in the dismal upper story; sometimes a minor native
+official on some trifling government quest would have his pomp and majesty awed
+by Madama&rsquo;s sepulchral hospitality. But Madama sat behind her bar
+content, not desiring to quarrel with Fate. If anyone required meat, drink or
+lodging at the Hotel de los Estranjeros they had but to come, and be served.
+<i>Está bueno.</i> If they came not, why, then, they came not. <i>Está
+bueno.</i>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As the exceptional yachtsman was making his way down the precarious sidewalk of
+the Street of the Holy Sepulchre, the solitary permanent guest of that decaying
+hotel sat at its door, enjoying the breeze from the sea.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dr. Gregg, the quarantine physician, was a man of fifty or sixty, with a florid
+face and the longest beard between Topeka and Terra del Fuego. He held his
+position by virtue of an appointment by the Board of Health of a seaport city
+in one of the Southern states. That city feared the ancient enemy of every
+Southern seaport&mdash;the yellow fever&mdash;and it was the duty of Dr. Gregg
+to examine crew and passengers of every vessel leaving Coralio for preliminary
+symptoms. The duties were light, and the salary, for one who lived in Coralio,
+ample. Surplus time there was in plenty; and the good doctor added to his gains
+by a large private practice among the residents of the coast. The fact that he
+did not know ten words of Spanish was no obstacle; a pulse could be felt and a
+fee collected without one being a linguist. Add to the description the facts
+that the doctor had a story to tell concerning the operation of trepanning
+which no listener had ever allowed him to conclude, and that he believed in
+brandy as a prophylactic; and the special points of interest possessed by Dr.
+Gregg will have become exhausted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The doctor had dragged a chair to the sidewalk. He was coatless, and he leaned
+back against the wall and smoked, while he stroked his beard. Surprise came
+into his pale blue eyes when he caught sight of Smith in his unusual and
+prismatic clothes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You&rsquo;re Dr. Gregg&mdash;is that right?&rdquo; said Smith, feeling
+the dog&rsquo;s head pin in his tie. &ldquo;The constable&mdash;I mean the
+consul, told me you hung out at this caravansary. My name&rsquo;s Smith; and I
+came in a yacht. Taking a cruise around, looking at the monkeys and
+pineapple-trees. Come inside and have a drink, Doc. This café looks on the
+blink, but I guess it can set out something wet.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I will join you, sir, in just a taste of brandy,&rdquo; said Dr. Gregg,
+rising quickly. &ldquo;I find that as a prophylactic a little brandy is almost
+a necessity in this climate.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As they turned to enter the <i>pulperia</i> a native man, barefoot, glided
+noiselessly up and addressed the doctor in Spanish. He was yellowish-brown,
+like an over-ripe lemon; he wore a cotton shirt and ragged linen trousers
+girded by a leather belt. His face was like an animal&rsquo;s, live and wary,
+but without promise of much intelligence. This man jabbered with animation and
+so much seriousness that it seemed a pity that his words were to be wasted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dr. Gregg felt his pulse.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You sick?&rdquo; he inquired.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Mi mujer está enferma en la casa</i>,&rdquo; said the man, thus
+endeavouring to convey the news, in the only language open to him, that his
+wife lay ill in her palm-thatched hut.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The doctor drew a handful of capsules filled with a white powder from his
+trousers pocket. He counted out ten of them into the native&rsquo;s hand, and
+held up his forefinger impressively.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Take one,&rdquo; said the doctor, &ldquo;every two hours.&rdquo; He then
+held up two fingers, shaking them emphatically before the native&rsquo;s face.
+Next he pulled out his watch and ran his finger round its dial twice. Again the
+two fingers confronted the patient&rsquo;s nose. &ldquo;Two&mdash;two&mdash;two
+hours,&rdquo; repeated the doctor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Si, Señor</i>,&rdquo; said the native, sadly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He pulled a cheap silver watch from his own pocket and laid it in the
+doctor&rsquo;s hand. &ldquo;Me bring,&rdquo; said he, struggling painfully with
+his scant English, &ldquo;other watchy to-morrow.&rdquo; Then he departed
+downheartedly with his capsules.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;A very ignorant race of people, sir,&rdquo; said the doctor, as he
+slipped the watch into his pocket. &ldquo;He seems to have mistaken my
+directions for taking the physic for the fee. However, it is all right. He owes
+me an account, anyway. The chances are that he won&rsquo;t bring the other
+watch. You can&rsquo;t depend on anything they promise you. About that drink,
+now? How did you come to Coralio, Mr. Smith? I was not aware that any boats
+except the <i>Karlsefin</i> had arrived for some days.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The two leaned against the deserted bar; and Madama set out a bottle without
+waiting for the doctor&rsquo;s order. There was no dust on it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After they had drank twice Smith said:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You say there were no passengers on the <i>Karlsefin</i>, Doc? Are you
+sure about that? It seems to me I heard somebody down on the beach say that
+there was one or two aboard.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They were mistaken, sir. I myself went out and put all hands through a
+medical examination, as usual. The <i>Karlsefin</i> sails as soon as she gets
+her bananas loaded, which will be about daylight in the morning, and she got
+everything ready this afternoon. No, sir, there was no passenger list. Like
+that Three-Star? A French schooner landed two slooploads of it a month ago. If
+any customs duties on it went to the distinguished republic of Anchuria you may
+have my hat. If you won&rsquo;t have another, come out and let&rsquo;s sit in
+the cool a while. It isn&rsquo;t often we exiles get a chance to talk with
+somebody from the outside world.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The doctor brought out another chair to the sidewalk for his new acquaintance.
+The two seated themselves.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You are a man of the world,&rdquo; said Dr. Gregg; &ldquo;a man of
+travel and experience. Your decision in a matter of ethics and, no doubt, on
+the points of equity, ability and professional probity should be of value. I
+would be glad if you will listen to the history of a case that I think stands
+unique in medical annals.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;About nine years ago, while I was engaged in the practice of medicine in
+my native city, I was called to treat a case of contusion of the skull. I made
+the diagnosis that a splinter of bone was pressing upon the brain, and that the
+surgical operation known as trepanning was required. However, as the patient
+was a gentleman of wealth and position, I called in for consultation
+Dr.&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Smith rose from his chair, and laid a hand, soft with apology, upon the
+doctor&rsquo;s shirt sleeve.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Say, Doc,&rdquo; he said, solemnly, &ldquo;I want to hear that story.
+You&rsquo;ve got me interested; and I don&rsquo;t want to miss the rest of it.
+I know it&rsquo;s a loola by the way it begins; and I want to tell it at the
+next meeting of the Barney O&rsquo;Flynn Association, if you don&rsquo;t mind.
+But I&rsquo;ve got one or two matters to attend to first. If I get &rsquo;em
+attended to in time I&rsquo;ll come right back and hear you spiel the rest
+before bedtime&mdash;is that right?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;By all means,&rdquo; said the doctor, &ldquo;get your business attended
+to, and then return. I shall wait up for you. You see, one of the most
+prominent physicians at the consultation diagnosed the trouble as a blood clot;
+another said it was an abscess, but I&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t tell me now, Doc. Don&rsquo;t spoil the story. Wait till I
+come back. I want to hear it as it runs off the reel&mdash;is that
+right?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The mountains reached up their bulky shoulders to receive the level gallop of
+Apollo&rsquo;s homing steeds, the day died in the lagoons and in the shadowed
+banana groves and in the mangrove swamps, where the great blue crabs were
+beginning to crawl to land for their nightly ramble. And it died, at last, upon
+the highest peaks. Then the brief twilight, ephemeral as the flight of a moth,
+came and went; the Southern Cross peeped with its topmost eye above a row of
+palms, and the fire-flies heralded with their torches the approach of
+soft-footed night.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the offing the <i>Karlsefin</i> swayed at anchor, her lights seeming to
+penetrate the water to countless fathoms with their shimmering, lanceolate
+reflections. The Caribs were busy loading her by means of the great lighters
+heaped full from the piles of fruit ranged upon the shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On the sandy beach, with his back against a cocoanut-tree and the stubs of many
+cigars lying around him, Smith sat waiting, never relaxing his sharp gaze in
+the direction of the steamer.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The incongruous yachtsman had concentrated his interest upon the innocent
+fruiter. Twice had he been assured that no passengers had come to Coralio on
+board of her. And yet, with a persistence not to be attributed to an idling
+voyager, he had appealed the case to the higher court of his own eyesight.
+Surprisingly like some gay-coated lizard, he crouched at the foot of the
+cocoanut palm, and with the beady, shifting eyes of the selfsame reptile,
+sustained his espionage on the <i>Karlsefin</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On the white sands a whiter gig belonging to the yacht was drawn up, guarded by
+one of the white-ducked crew. Not far away in a <i>pulperia</i> on the
+shore-following Calle Grande three other sailors swaggered with their cues
+around Coralio&rsquo;s solitary billiard-table. The boat lay there as if under
+orders to be ready for use at any moment. There was in the atmosphere a hint of
+expectation, of waiting for something to occur, which was foreign to the air of
+Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Like some passing bird of brilliant plumage, Smith alights on this palmy shore
+but to preen his wings for an instant and then to fly away upon silent pinions.
+When morning dawned there was no Smith, no waiting gig, no yacht in the offing.
+Smith left no intimation of his mission there, no footprints to show where he
+had followed the trail of his mystery on the sands of Coralio that night. He
+came; he spake his strange jargon of the asphalt and the cafés; he sat under
+the cocoanut-tree, and vanished. The next morning Coralio, Smithless, ate its
+fried plantain and said: &ldquo;The man of pictured clothing went himself
+away.&rdquo; With the <i>siesta</i> the incident passed, yawning, into history.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So, for a time, must Smith pass behind the scenes of the play. He comes no more
+to Coralio nor to Doctor Gregg, who sits in vain, wagging his redundant beard,
+waiting to enrich his derelict audience with his moving tale of trepanning and
+jealousy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But prosperously to the lucidity of these loose pages, Smith shall flutter
+among them again. In the nick of time he shall come to tell us why he strewed
+so many anxious cigar stumps around the cocoanut palm that night. This he must
+do; for, when he sailed away before the dawn in his yacht <i>Rambler</i>, he
+carried with him the answer to a riddle so big and preposterous that few in
+Anchuria had ventured even to propound it.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap04"></a>IV<br/>
+CAUGHT</h2>
+
+<p>
+The plans for the detention of the flying President Miraflores and his
+companion at the coast line seemed hardly likely to fail. Dr. Zavalla himself
+had gone to the port of Alazan to establish a guard at that point. At Solitas
+the Liberal patriot Varras could be depended upon to keep close watch. Goodwin
+held himself responsible for the district about Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The news of the president&rsquo;s flight had been disclosed to no one in the
+coast towns save trusted members of the ambitious political party that was
+desirous of succeeding to power. The telegraph wire running from San Mateo to
+the coast had been cut far up on the mountain trail by an emissary of
+Zavalla&rsquo;s. Long before this could be repaired and word received along it
+from the capital the fugitives would have reached the coast and the question of
+escape or capture been solved.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin had stationed armed sentinels at frequent intervals along the shore for
+a mile in each direction from Coralio. They were instructed to keep a vigilant
+lookout during the night to prevent Miraflores from attempting to embark
+stealthily by means of some boat or sloop found by chance at the water&rsquo;s
+edge. A dozen patrols walked the streets of Coralio unsuspected, ready to
+intercept the truant official should he show himself there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin was very well convinced that no precautions had been overlooked. He
+strolled about the streets that bore such high-sounding names and were but
+narrow, grass-covered lanes, lending his own aid to the vigil that had been
+intrusted to him by Bob Englehart.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The town had begun the tepid round of its nightly diversions. A few leisurely
+dandies, clad in white duck, with flowing neckties, and swinging slim bamboo
+canes, threaded the grassy by-ways toward the houses of their favoured
+señoritas. Those who wooed the art of music dragged tirelessly at whining
+concertinas, or fingered lugubrious guitars at doors and windows. An occasional
+soldier from the <i>cuartel</i>, with flapping straw hat, without coat or
+shoes, hurried by, balancing his long gun like a lance in one hand. From every
+density of the foliage the giant tree frogs sounded their loud and irritating
+clatter. Further out, where the by-ways perished at the brink of the jungle,
+the guttural cries of marauding baboons and the coughing of the alligators in
+the black estuaries fractured the vain silence of the wood.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By ten o&rsquo;clock the streets were deserted. The oil lamps that had burned,
+a sickly yellow, at random corners, had been extinguished by some economical
+civic agent. Coralio lay sleeping calmly between toppling mountains and
+encroaching sea like a stolen babe in the arms of its abductors. Somewhere over
+in that tropical darkness&mdash;perhaps already threading the profundities of
+the alluvial lowlands&mdash;the high adventurer and his mate were moving toward
+land&rsquo;s end. The game of Fox-in-the-Morning should be coming soon to its
+close.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin, at his deliberate gait, passed the long, low <i>cuartel</i> where
+Coralio&rsquo;s contingent of Anchuria&rsquo;s military force slumbered, with
+its bare toes pointed heavenward. There was a law that no civilian might come
+so near the headquarters of that citadel of war after nine o&rsquo;clock, but
+Goodwin was always forgetting the minor statutes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Quién vive?</i>&rdquo; shrieked the sentinel, wrestling prodigiously
+with his lengthy musket.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Americano</i>,&rdquo; growled Goodwin, without turning his head, and
+passed on, unhalted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+To the right he turned, and to the left up the street that ultimately reached
+the Plaza Nacional. When within the toss of a cigar stump from the intersecting
+Street of the Holy Sepulchre, he stopped suddenly in the pathway.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He saw the form of a tall man, clothed in black and carrying a large valise,
+hurry down the cross-street in the direction of the beach. And Goodwin&rsquo;s
+second glance made him aware of a woman at the man&rsquo;s elbow on the farther
+side, who seemed to urge forward, if not even to assist, her companion in their
+swift but silent progress. They were no Coralians, those two.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin followed at increased speed, but without any of the artful tactics that
+are so dear to the heart of the sleuth. The American was too broad to feel the
+instinct of the detective. He stood as an agent for the people of Anchuria, and
+but for political reasons he would have demanded then and there the money. It
+was the design of his party to secure the imperilled fund, to restore it to the
+treasury of the country, and to declare itself in power without bloodshed or
+resistance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The couple halted at the door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros, and the man
+struck upon the wood with the impatience of one unused to his entry being
+stayed. Madama was long in response; but after a time her light showed, the
+door was opened, and the guests housed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin stood in the quiet street, lighting another cigar. In two minutes a
+faint gleam began to show between the slats of the jalousies in the upper story
+of the hotel. &ldquo;They have engaged rooms,&rdquo; said Goodwin to himself.
+&ldquo;So, then, their arrangements for sailing have yet to be made.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At that moment there came along one Estebán Delgado, a barber, an enemy to
+existing government, a jovial plotter against stagnation in any form. This
+barber was one of Coralio&rsquo;s saddest dogs, often remaining out of doors as
+late as eleven, post meridian. He was a partisan Liberal; and he greeted
+Goodwin with flatulent importance as a brother in the cause. But he had
+something important to tell.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What think you, Don Frank!&rdquo; he cried, in the universal tone of the
+conspirator. &ldquo;I have to-night shaved <i>la barba</i>&mdash;what you call
+the &lsquo;weeskers&rsquo; of the <i>Presidente</i> himself, of this countree!
+Consider! He sent for me to come. In the poor <i>casita</i> of an old woman he
+awaited me&mdash;in a verree leetle house in a dark place.
+<i>Carramba!</i>&mdash;el Señor Presidente to make himself thus secret and
+obscured! I think he desired not to be known&mdash;but, <i>carajo!</i> can you
+shave a man and not see his face? This gold piece he gave me, and said it was
+to be all quite still. I think, Don Frank, there is what you call a chip over
+the bug.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Have you ever seen President Miraflores before?&rdquo; asked Goodwin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;But once,&rdquo; answered Estebán. &ldquo;He is tall; and he had
+weeskers, verree black and sufficient.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Was anyone else present when you shaved him?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;An old Indian woman, Señor, that belonged with the <i>casa</i>, and one
+señorita&mdash;a ladee of so much beautee!&mdash;<i>ah, Dios!</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;All right, Estebán,&rdquo; said Goodwin. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s very lucky
+that you happened along with your tonsorial information. The new administration
+will be likely to remember you for this.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then in a few words he made the barber acquainted with the crisis into which
+the affairs of the nation had culminated, and instructed him to remain outside,
+keeping watch upon the two sides of the hotel that looked upon the street, and
+observing whether anyone should attempt to leave the house by any door or
+window. Goodwin himself went to the door through which the guests had entered,
+opened it and stepped inside.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Madama had returned downstairs from her journey above to see after the comfort
+of her lodgers. Her candle stood upon the bar. She was about to take a
+thimbleful of rum as a solace for having her rest disturbed. She looked up
+without surprise or alarm as her third caller entered.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Ah! it is the Señor Goodwin. Not often does he honour my poor house by
+his presence.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I must come oftener,&rdquo; said Goodwin, with the Goodwin smile.
+&ldquo;I hear that your cognac is the best between Belize to the north and Rio
+to the south. Set out the bottle, Madama, and let us have the proof in <i>un
+vasito</i> for each of us.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;My <i>aguardiente</i>,&rdquo; said Madama, with pride, &ldquo;is the
+best. It grows, in beautiful bottles, in the dark places among the
+banana-trees. <i>Si, Señor.</i> Only at midnight can they be picked by
+sailor-men who bring them, before daylight comes, to your back door. Good
+<i>aguardiente</i> is a verree difficult fruit to handle, Señor Goodwin.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Smuggling, in Coralio, was much nearer than competition to being the life of
+trade. One spoke of it slyly, yet with a certain conceit, when it had been well
+accomplished.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You have guests in the house to-night,&rdquo; said Goodwin, laying a
+silver dollar upon the counter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Why not?&rdquo; said Madama, counting the change. &ldquo;Two; but the
+smallest while finished to arrive. One señor, not quite old, and one señorita
+of sufficient handsomeness. To their rooms they have ascended, not desiring the
+to-eat nor the to-drink. Two rooms&mdash;<i>Numero</i> 9 and <i>Numero</i>
+10.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I was expecting that gentleman and that lady,&rdquo; said Goodwin.
+&ldquo;I have important <i>negocios</i> that must be transacted. Will you allow
+me to see them?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Why not?&rdquo; sighed Madama, placidly. &ldquo;Why should not Señor
+Goodwin ascend and speak to his friends? <i>Está bueno.</i> Room <i>Numero</i>
+9 and room <i>Numero</i> 10.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin loosened in his coat pocket the American revolver that he carried, and
+ascended the steep, dark stairway.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the hallway above, the saffron light from a hanging lamp allowed him to
+select the gaudy numbers on the doors. He turned the knob of Number 9, entered
+and closed the door behind him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+If that was Isabel Guilbert seated by the table in that poorly furnished room,
+report had failed to do her charms justice. She rested her head upon one hand.
+Extreme fatigue was signified in every line of her figure; and upon her
+countenance a deep perplexity was written. Her eyes were gray-irised, and of
+that mould that seems to have belonged to the orbs of all the famous queens of
+hearts. Their whites were singularly clear and brilliant, concealed above the
+irises by heavy horizontal lids, and showing a snowy line below them. Such eyes
+denote great nobility, vigour, and, if you can conceive of it, a most generous
+selfishness. She looked up when the American entered with an expression of
+surprised inquiry, but without alarm.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin took off his hat and seated himself, with his characteristic deliberate
+ease, upon a corner of the table. He held a lighted cigar between his fingers.
+He took this familiar course because he was sure that preliminaries would be
+wasted upon Miss Guilbert. He knew her history, and the small part that the
+conventions had played in it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Good evening,&rdquo; he said. &ldquo;Now, madame, let us come to
+business at once. You will observe that I mention no names, but I know who is
+in the next room, and what he carries in that valise. That is the point which
+brings me here. I have come to dictate terms of surrender.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The lady neither moved nor replied, but steadily regarded the cigar in
+Goodwin&rsquo;s hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We,&rdquo; continued the dictator, thoughtfully regarding the neat
+buckskin shoe on his gently swinging foot&mdash;&ldquo;I speak for a
+considerable majority of the people&mdash;demand the return of the stolen funds
+belonging to them. Our terms go very little further than that. They are very
+simple. As an accredited spokesman, I promise that our interference will cease
+if they are accepted. Give up the money, and you and your companion will be
+permitted to proceed wherever you will. In fact, assistance will be given you
+in the matter of securing a passage by any outgoing vessel you may choose. It
+is on my personal responsibility that I add congratulations to the gentleman in
+Number 10 upon his taste in feminine charms.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Returning his cigar to his mouth, Goodwin observed her, and saw that her eyes
+followed it and rested upon it with icy and significant concentration.
+Apparently she had not heard a word he had said. He understood, tossed the
+cigar out the window, and, with an amused laugh, slid from the table to his
+feet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That is better,&rdquo; said the lady. &ldquo;It makes it possible for me
+to listen to you. For a second lesson in good manners, you might now tell me by
+whom I am being insulted.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I am sorry,&rdquo; said Goodwin, leaning one hand on the table,
+&ldquo;that my time is too brief for devoting much of it to a course of
+etiquette. Come, now; I appeal to your good sense. You have shown yourself, in
+more than one instance, to be well aware of what is to your advantage. This is
+an occasion that demands the exercise of your undoubted intelligence. There is
+no mystery here. I am Frank Goodwin; and I have come for the money. I entered
+this room at a venture. Had I entered the other I would have had it before now.
+Do you want it in words? The gentleman in Number 10 has betrayed a great trust.
+He has robbed his people of a large sum, and it is I who will prevent their
+losing it. I do not say who that gentleman is; but if I should be forced to see
+him and he should prove to be a certain high official of the republic, it will
+be my duty to arrest him. The house is guarded. I am offering you liberal
+terms. It is not absolutely necessary that I confer personally with the
+gentleman in the next room. Bring me the valise containing the money, and we
+will call the affair ended.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The lady arose from her chair and stood for a moment, thinking deeply.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Do you live here, Mr. Goodwin?&rdquo; she asked, presently.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Yes.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What is your authority for this intrusion?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I am an instrument of the republic. I was advised by wire of the
+movements of the&mdash;gentleman in Number 10.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;May I ask you two or three questions? I believe you to be a man more apt
+to be truthful than&mdash;timid. What sort of a town is this&mdash;Coralio, I
+think they call it?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not much of a town,&rdquo; said Goodwin, smiling. &ldquo;A banana town,
+as they run. Grass huts, &rsquo;dobes, five or six two-story houses,
+accommodations limited, population half-breed Spanish and Indian, Caribs and
+blackamoors. No sidewalks to speak of, no amusements. Rather unmoral.
+That&rsquo;s an offhand sketch, of course.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Are there any inducements, say in a social or in a business way, for
+people to reside here?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Oh, yes,&rdquo; answered Goodwin, smiling broadly. &ldquo;There are no
+afternoon teas, no hand-organs, no department stores&mdash;and there is no
+extradition treaty.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;He told me,&rdquo; went on the lady, speaking as if to herself, and with
+a slight frown, &ldquo;that there were towns on this coast of beauty and
+importance; that there was a pleasing social order&mdash;especially an American
+colony of cultured residents.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;There is an American colony,&rdquo; said Goodwin, gazing at her in some
+wonder. &ldquo;Some of the members are all right. Some are fugitives from
+justice from the States. I recall two exiled bank presidents, one army
+paymaster under a cloud, a couple of manslayers, and a widow&mdash;arsenic, I
+believe, was the suspicion in her case. I myself complete the colony, but, as
+yet, I have not distinguished myself by any particular crime.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Do not lose hope,&rdquo; said the lady, dryly; &ldquo;I see nothing in
+your actions to-night to guarantee you further obscurity. Some mistake has been
+made; I do not know just where. But <i>him</i> you shall not disturb to-night.
+The journey has fatigued him so that he has fallen asleep, I think, in his
+clothes. You talk of stolen money! I do not understand you. Some mistake has
+been made. I will convince you. Remain where you are and I will bring you the
+valise that you seem to covet so, and show it to you.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She moved toward the closed door that connected the two rooms, but stopped, and
+half turned and bestowed upon Goodwin a grave, searching look that ended in a
+quizzical smile.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You force my door,&rdquo; she said, &ldquo;and you follow your ruffianly
+behaviour with the basest accusations; and yet&rdquo;&mdash;she hesitated, as
+if to reconsider what she was about to say&mdash;&ldquo;and yet&mdash;it is a
+puzzling thing&mdash;I am sure there has been some mistake.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She took a step toward the door, but Goodwin stayed her by a light touch upon
+her arm. I have said before that women turned to look at him in the streets. He
+was the viking sort of man, big, good-looking, and with an air of kindly
+truculence. She was dark and proud, glowing or pale as her mood moved her. I do
+not know if Eve were light or dark, but if such a woman had stood in the garden
+I know that the apple would have been eaten. This woman was to be
+Goodwin&rsquo;s fate, and he did not know it; but he must have felt the first
+throes of destiny, for, as he faced her, the knowledge of what report named her
+turned bitter in his throat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;If there has been any mistake,&rdquo; he said, hotly, &ldquo;it was
+yours. I do not blame the man who has lost his country, his honour, and is
+about to lose the poor consolation of his stolen riches as much as I blame you,
+for, by Heaven! I can very well see how he was brought to it. I can understand,
+and pity him. It is such women as you that strew this degraded coast with
+wretched exiles, that make men forget their trusts, that drag&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The lady interrupted him with a weary gesture.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;There is no need to continue your insults,&rdquo; she said, coldly.
+&ldquo;I do not understand what you are saying, nor do I know what mad blunder
+you are making; but if the inspection of the contents of a gentleman&rsquo;s
+portmanteau will rid me of you, let us delay it no longer.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She passed quickly and noiselessly into the other room, and returned with the
+heavy leather valise, which she handed to the American with an air of patient
+contempt.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin set the valise quickly upon the table and began to unfasten the straps.
+The lady stood by, with an expression of infinite scorn and weariness upon her
+face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The valise opened wide to a powerful, sidelong wrench. Goodwin dragged out two
+or three articles of clothing, exposing the bulk of its contents&mdash;package
+after package of tightly packed United States bank and treasury notes of large
+denomination. Reckoning from the high figures written upon the paper bands that
+bound them, the total must have come closely upon the hundred thousand mark.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin glanced swiftly at the woman, and saw, with surprise and a thrill of
+pleasure that he wondered at, that she had experienced an unmistakable shock.
+Her eyes grew wide, she gasped, and leaned heavily against the table. She had
+been ignorant, then, he inferred, that her companion had looted the government
+treasury. But why, he angrily asked himself, should he be so well pleased to
+think this wandering and unscrupulous singer not so black as report had painted
+her?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A noise in the other room startled them both. The door swung open, and a tall,
+elderly, dark complexioned man, recently shaven, hurried into the room.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+All the pictures of President Miraflores represent him as the possessor of a
+luxuriant supply of dark and carefully tended whiskers; but the story of the
+barber, Estebán, had prepared Goodwin for the change.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The man stumbled in from the dark room, his eyes blinking at the lamplight, and
+heavy from sleep.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What does this mean?&rdquo; he demanded in excellent English, with a
+keen and perturbed look at the American&mdash;&ldquo;robbery?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Very near it,&rdquo; answered Goodwin. &ldquo;But I rather think
+I&rsquo;m in time to prevent it. I represent the people to whom this money
+belongs, and I have come to convey it back to them.&rdquo; He thrust his hand
+into a pocket of his loose, linen coat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The other man&rsquo;s hand went quickly behind him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t draw,&rdquo; called Goodwin, sharply; &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got
+you covered from my pocket.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The lady stepped forward, and laid one hand upon the shoulder of her hesitating
+companion. She pointed to the table. &ldquo;Tell me the truth&mdash;the
+truth,&rdquo; she said, in a low voice. &ldquo;Whose money is that?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The man did not answer. He gave a deep, long-drawn sigh, leaned and kissed her
+on the forehead, stepped back into the other room and closed the door.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin foresaw his purpose, and jumped for the door, but the report of the
+pistol echoed as his hand touched the knob. A heavy fall followed, and some one
+swept him aside and struggled into the room of the fallen man.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A desolation, thought Goodwin, greater than that derived from the loss of
+cavalier and gold must have been in the heart of the enchantress to have wrung
+from her, in that moment, the cry of one turning to the all-forgiving,
+all-comforting earthly consoler&mdash;to have made her call out from that
+bloody and dishonoured room&mdash;&ldquo;Oh, mother, mother, mother!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But there was an alarm outside. The barber, Estebán, at the sound of the shot,
+had raised his voice; and the shot itself had aroused half the town. A
+pattering of feet came up the street, and official orders rang out on the still
+air. Goodwin had a duty to perform. Circumstances had made him the custodian of
+his adopted country&rsquo;s treasure. Swiftly cramming the money into the
+valise, he closed it, leaned far out of the window and dropped it into a thick
+orange-tree in the little inclosure below.
+</p>
+
+<p class="p2">
+They will tell you in Coralio, as they delight in telling the stranger, of the
+conclusion of that tragic flight. They will tell you how the upholders of the
+law came apace when the alarm was sounded&mdash;the <i>Comandante</i> in red
+slippers and a jacket like a head waiter&rsquo;s and girded sword, the soldiers
+with their interminable guns, followed by outnumbering officers struggling into
+their gold lace and epaulettes; the barefooted policemen (the only capables in
+the lot), and ruffled citizens of every hue and description.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They say that the countenance of the dead man was marred sadly by the effects
+of the shot; but he was identified as the fallen president by both Goodwin and
+the barber Estebán. On the next morning messages began to come over the mended
+telegraph wire; and the story of the flight from the capital was given out to
+the public. In San Mateo the revolutionary party had seized the sceptre of
+government, without opposition, and the <i>vivas</i> of the mercurial populace
+quickly effaced the interest belonging to the unfortunate Miraflores.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They will relate to you how the new government sifted the towns and raked the
+roads to find the valise containing Anchuria&rsquo;s surplus capital, which the
+president was known to have carried with him, but all in vain. In Coralio Señor
+Goodwin himself led the searching party which combed that town as carefully as
+a woman combs her hair; but the money was not found.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So they buried the dead man, without honours, back of the town near the little
+bridge that spans the mangrove swamp; and for a <i>real</i> a boy will show you
+his grave. They say that the old woman in whose hut the barber shaved the
+president placed the wooden slab at his head, and burned the inscription upon
+it with a hot iron.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+You will hear also that Señor Goodwin, like a tower of strength, shielded Doña
+Isabel Guilbert through those subsequent distressful days; and that his
+scruples as to her past career (if he had any) vanished; and her adventuresome
+waywardness (if she had any) left her, and they were wedded and were happy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The American built a home on a little foothill near the town. It is a
+conglomerate structure of native woods that, exported, would be worth a
+fortune, and of brick, palm, glass, bamboo and adobe. There is a paradise of
+nature about it; and something of the same sort within. The natives speak of
+its interior with hands uplifted in admiration. There are floors polished like
+mirrors and covered with hand-woven Indian rugs of silk fibre, tall ornaments
+and pictures, musical instruments and papered
+walls&mdash;&ldquo;figure-it-to-yourself!&rdquo; they exclaim.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But they cannot tell you in Coralio (as you shall learn) what became of the
+money that Frank Goodwin dropped into the orange-tree. But that shall come
+later; for the palms are fluttering in the breeze, bidding us to sport and
+gaiety.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap05"></a>V<br/>
+CUPID&rsquo;S EXILE NUMBER TWO</h2>
+
+<p>
+The United States of America, after looking over its stock of consular timber,
+selected Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood, of Dalesburg, Alabama, for a successor
+to Willard Geddie, resigned.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Without prejudice to Mr. Atwood, it will have to be acknowledged that, in this
+instance, it was the man who sought the office. As with the self-banished
+Geddie, it was nothing less than the artful smiles of lovely woman that had
+driven Johnny Atwood to the desperate expedient of accepting office under a
+despised Federal Government so that he might go far, far away and never see
+again the false, fair face that had wrecked his young life. The consulship at
+Coralio seemed to offer a retreat sufficiently removed and romantic enough to
+inject the necessary drama into the pastoral scenes of Dalesburg life.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was while playing the part of Cupid&rsquo;s exile that Johnny added his
+handiwork to the long list of casualties along the Spanish Main by his famous
+manipulation of the shoe market, and his unparalleled feat of elevating the
+most despised and useless weed in his own country from obscurity to be a
+valuable product in international commerce.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The trouble began, as trouble often begins instead of ending, with a romance.
+In Dalesburg there was a man named Elijah Hemstetter, who kept a general store.
+His family consisted of one daughter called Rosine, a name that atoned much for
+&ldquo;Hemstetter.&rdquo; This young woman was possessed of plentiful
+attractions, so that the young men of the community were agitated in their
+bosoms. Among the more agitated was Johnny, the son of Judge Atwood, who lived
+in the big colonial mansion on the edge of Dalesburg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It would seem that the desirable Rosine should have been pleased to return the
+affection of an Atwood, a name honoured all over the state long before and
+since the war. It does seem that she should have gladly consented to have been
+led into that stately but rather empty colonial mansion. But not so. There was
+a cloud on the horizon, a threatening, cumulus cloud, in the shape of a lively
+and shrewd young farmer in the neighbourhood who dared to enter the lists as a
+rival to the high-born Atwood.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One night Johnny propounded to Rosine a question that is considered of much
+importance by the young of the human species. The accessories were all
+there&mdash;moonlight, oleanders, magnolias, the mock-bird&rsquo;s song.
+Whether or no the shadow of Pinkney Dawson, the prosperous young farmer, came
+between them on that occasion is not known; but Rosine&rsquo;s answer was
+unfavourable. Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood bowed till his hat touched the
+lawn grass, and went away with his head high, but with a sore wound in his
+pedigree and heart. A Hemstetter refuse an Atwood! Zounds!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Among other accidents of that year was a Democratic president. Judge Atwood was
+a warhorse of Democracy. Johnny persuaded him to set the wheels moving for some
+foreign appointment. He would go away&mdash;away. Perhaps in years to come
+Rosine would think how true, how faithful his love had been, and would drop a
+tear&mdash;maybe in the cream she would be skimming for Pink Dawson&rsquo;s
+breakfast.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The wheels of politics revolved; and Johnny was appointed consul to Coralio.
+Just before leaving he dropped in at Hemstetter&rsquo;s to say good-bye. There
+was a queer, pinkish look about Rosine&rsquo;s eyes; and had the two been
+alone, the United States might have had to cast about for another consul. But
+Pink Dawson was there, of course, talking about his 400-acre orchard, and the
+three-mile alfalfa tract, and the 200-acre pasture. So Johnny shook hands with
+Rosine as coolly as if he were only going to run up to Montgomery for a couple
+of days. They had the royal manner when they chose, those Atwoods.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;If you happen to strike anything in the way of a good investment down
+there, Johnny,&rdquo; said Pink Dawson, &ldquo;just let me know, will you? I
+reckon I could lay my hands on a few extra thousands &rsquo;most any time for a
+profitable deal.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Certainly, Pink,&rdquo; said Johnny, pleasantly. &ldquo;If I strike
+anything of the sort I&rsquo;ll let you in with pleasure.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So Johnny went down to Mobile and took a fruit steamer for the coast of
+Anchuria.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the new consul arrived in Coralio the strangeness of the scenes diverted
+him much. He was only twenty-two; and the grief of youth is not worn like a
+garment as it is by older men. It has its seasons when it reigns; and then it
+is unseated for a time by the assertion of the keen senses.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Billy Keogh and Johnny seemed to conceive a mutual friendship at once. Keogh
+took the new consul about town and presented him to the handful of Americans
+and the smaller number of French and Germans who made up the
+&ldquo;foreign&rdquo; contingent. And then, of course, he had to be more
+formally introduced to the native officials, and have his credentials
+transmitted through an interpreter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was something about the young Southerner that the sophisticated Keogh
+liked. His manner was simple almost to boyishness; but he possessed the cool
+carelessness of a man of far greater age and experience. Neither uniforms nor
+titles, red tape nor foreign languages, mountains nor sea weighed upon his
+spirits. He was heir to all the ages, an Atwood, of Dalesburg; and you might
+know every thought conceived in his bosom.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Geddie came down to the consulate to explain the duties and workings of the
+office. He and Keogh tried to interest the new consul in their description of
+the work that his government expected him to perform.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It&rsquo;s all right,&rdquo; said Johnny from the hammock that he had
+set up as the official reclining place. &ldquo;If anything turns up that has to
+be done I&rsquo;ll let you fellows do it. You can&rsquo;t expect a Democrat to
+work during his first term of holding office.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You might look over these headings,&rdquo; suggested Geddie, &ldquo;of
+the different lines of exports you will have to keep account of. The fruit is
+classified; and there are the valuable woods, coffee, rubber&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That last account sounds all right,&rdquo; interrupted Mr. Atwood.
+&ldquo;Sounds as if it could be stretched. I want to buy a new flag, a monkey,
+a guitar and a barrel of pineapples. Will that rubber account stretch over
+&rsquo;em?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s merely statistics,&rdquo; said Geddie, smiling. &ldquo;The
+expense account is what you want. It is supposed to have a slight elasticity.
+The &lsquo;stationery&rsquo; items are sometimes carelessly audited by the
+State Department.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We&rsquo;re wasting our time,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;This man was
+born to hold office. He penetrates to the root of the art at one step of his
+eagle eye. The true genius of government shows its hand in every word of his
+speech.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I didn&rsquo;t take this job with any intention of working,&rdquo;
+explained Johnny, lazily. &ldquo;I wanted to go somewhere in the world where
+they didn&rsquo;t talk about farms. There are none here, are there?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not the kind you are acquainted with,&rdquo; answered the ex-consul.
+&ldquo;There is no such art here as agriculture. There never was a plow or a
+reaper within the boundaries of Anchuria.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;This is the country for me,&rdquo; murmured the consul, and immediately
+he fell asleep.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The cheerful tintypist pursued his intimacy with Johnny in spite of open
+charges that he did so to obtain a preëmption on a seat in that coveted spot,
+the rear gallery of the consulate. But whether his designs were selfish or
+purely friendly, Keogh achieved that desirable privilege. Few were the nights
+on which the two could not be found reposing there in the sea breeze, with
+their heels on the railing, and the cigars and brandy conveniently near.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One evening they sat thus, mainly silent, for their talk had dwindled before
+the stilling influence of an unusual night.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was a great, full moon; and the sea was mother-of-pearl. Almost every
+sound was hushed, for the air was but faintly stirring; and the town lay
+panting, waiting for the night to cool. Offshore lay the fruit steamer
+<i>Andador</i>, of the Vesuvius line, full-laden and scheduled to sail at six
+in the morning. There were no loiterers on the beach. So bright was the
+moonlight that the two men could see the small pebbles shining on the beach
+where the gentle surf wetted them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then down the coast, tacking close to shore, slowly swam a little sloop,
+white-winged like some snowy sea fowl. Its course lay within twenty points of
+the wind&rsquo;s eye; so it veered in and out again in long, slow strokes like
+the movements of a graceful skater.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Again the tactics of its crew brought it close in shore, this time nearly
+opposite the consulate; and then there blew from the sloop clear and surprising
+notes as if from a horn of elfland. A fairy bugle it might have been, sweet and
+silvery and unexpected, playing with spirit the familiar air of &ldquo;Home,
+Sweet Home.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was a scene set for the land of the lotus. The authority of the sea and the
+tropics, the mystery that attends unknown sails, and the prestige of drifting
+music on moonlit waters gave it an anodynous charm. Johnny Atwood felt it, and
+thought of Dalesburg; but as soon as Keogh&rsquo;s mind had arrived at a theory
+concerning the peripatetic solo he sprang to the railing, and his ear-rending
+yawp fractured the silence of Coralio like a cannon shot.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Mel-lin-ger a-hoy!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The sloop was now on its outward tack; but from it came a clear, answering
+hail:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Good-bye, Billy … go-ing home&mdash;bye!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The <i>Andador</i> was the sloop&rsquo;s destination. No doubt some passenger
+with a sailing permit from some up-the-coast point had come down in this sloop
+to catch the regular fruit steamer on its return trip. Like a coquettish pigeon
+the little boat tacked on its eccentric way until at last its white sail was
+lost to sight against the larger bulk of the fruiter&rsquo;s side.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s old H. P. Mellinger,&rdquo; explained Keogh, dropping back
+into his chair. &ldquo;He&rsquo;s going back to New York. He was private
+secretary of the late hot-foot president of this grocery and fruit stand that
+they call a country. His job&rsquo;s over now; and I guess old Mellinger is
+glad.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Why does he disappear to music, like Zo-zo, the magic queen?&rdquo;
+asked Johnny. &ldquo;Just to show &rsquo;em that he doesn&rsquo;t care?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That noise you heard is a phonograph,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;I sold
+him that. Mellinger had a graft in this country that was the only thing of its
+kind in the world. The tooting machine saved it for him once, and he always
+carried it around with him afterward.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Tell me about it,&rdquo; demanded Johnny, betraying interest.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;m no disseminator of narratives,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;I can
+use language for purposes of speech; but when I attempt a discourse the words
+come out as they will, and they may make sense when they strike the atmosphere,
+or they may not.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I want to hear about that graft,&rdquo; persisted Johnny.
+&ldquo;You&rsquo;ve got no right to refuse. I&rsquo;ve told you all about every
+man, woman and hitching post in Dalesburg.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You shall hear it,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;I said my instincts of
+narrative were perplexed. Don&rsquo;t you believe it. It&rsquo;s an art
+I&rsquo;ve acquired along with many other of the graces and sciences.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap06"></a>VI<br/>
+THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT</h2>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What was this graft?&rdquo; asked Johnny, with the impatience of the
+great public to whom tales are told.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Tis contrary to art and philosophy to give you the
+information,&rdquo; said Keogh, calmly. &ldquo;The art of narrative consists in
+concealing from your audience everything it wants to know until after you
+expose your favourite opinions on topics foreign to the subject. A good story
+is like a bitter pill with the sugar coating inside of it. I will begin, if you
+please, with a horoscope located in the Cherokee Nation; and end with a moral
+tune on the phonograph.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Me and Henry Horsecollar brought the first phonograph to this country.
+Henry was a quarter-breed, quarter-back Cherokee, educated East in the idioms
+of football, and West in contraband whisky, and a gentleman, the same as you
+and me. He was easy and romping in his ways; a man about six foot, with a kind
+of rubber-tire movement. Yes, he was a little man about five foot five, or five
+foot eleven. He was what you would call a medium tall man of average smallness.
+Henry had quit college once, and the Muscogee jail three times&mdash;the
+last-named institution on account of introducing and selling whisky in the
+territories. Henry Horsecollar never let any cigar stores come up and stand
+behind him. He didn&rsquo;t belong to that tribe of Indians.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Henry and me met at Texarkana, and figured out this phonograph scheme.
+He had $360 which came to him out of a land allotment in the reservation. I had
+run down from Little Rock on account of a distressful scene I had witnessed on
+the street there. A man stood on a box and passed around some gold watches,
+screw case, stem-winders, Elgin movement, very elegant. Twenty bucks they cost
+you over the counter. At three dollars the crowd fought for the tickers. The
+man happened to find a valise full of them handy, and he passed them out like
+putting hot biscuits on a plate. The backs were hard to unscrew, but the crowd
+put its ear to the case, and they ticked mollifying and agreeable. Three of
+these watches were genuine tickers; the rest were only kickers. Hey? Why, empty
+cases with one of them horny black bugs that fly around electric lights in
+&rsquo;em. Them bugs kick off minutes and seconds industrious and beautiful.
+So, this man I was speaking of cleaned up $288; and then he went away, because
+he knew that when it came time to wind watches in Little Rock an entomologist
+would be needed, and he wasn&rsquo;t one.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;So, as I say, Henry had $360, and I had $288. The idea of introducing
+the phonograph to South America was Henry&rsquo;s; but I took to it freely,
+being fond of machinery of all kinds.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;The Latin races,&rsquo; says Henry, explaining easy in the idioms
+he learned at college, &lsquo;are peculiarly adapted to be victims of the
+phonograph. They have the artistic temperament. They yearn for music and color
+and gaiety. They give wampum to the hand-organ man and the four-legged chicken
+in the tent when they&rsquo;re months behind with the grocery and the
+bread-fruit tree.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Then,&rsquo; says I, &lsquo;we&rsquo;ll export canned music to
+the Latins; but I&rsquo;m mindful of Mr. Julius Cæsar&rsquo;s account of
+&rsquo;em where he says: &ldquo;<i>Omnia Gallia in tres partes divisa
+est</i>;&rdquo; which is the same as to say, &ldquo;We will need all of our
+gall in devising means to tree them parties.&rdquo;&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I hated to make a show of education; but I was disinclined to be
+overdone in syntax by a mere Indian, a member of a race to which we owe nothing
+except the land on which the United States is situated.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We bought a fine phonograph in Texarkana&mdash;one of the best
+make&mdash;and half a trunkful of records. We packed up, and took the T. and P.
+for New Orleans. From that celebrated centre of molasses and disfranchised coon
+songs we took a steamer for South America.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We landed at Solitas, forty miles up the coast from here. &rsquo;Twas a
+palatable enough place to look at. The houses were clean and white; and to look
+at &rsquo;em stuck around among the scenery they reminded you of hard-boiled
+eggs served with lettuce. There was a block of skyscraper mountains in the
+suburbs; and they kept pretty quiet, like they had crept up there and were
+watching the town. And the sea was remarking &lsquo;Sh-sh-sh&rsquo; on the
+beach; and now and then a ripe cocoanut would drop kerblip in the sand; and
+that was all there was doing. Yes, I judge that town was considerably on the
+quiet. I judge that after Gabriel quits blowing his horn, and the car starts,
+with Philadelphia swinging to the last strap, and Pine Gully, Arkansas, hanging
+onto the rear step, this town of Solitas will wake up and ask if anybody spoke.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The captain went ashore with us, and offered to conduct what he seemed
+to like to call the obsequies. He introduced Henry and me to the United States
+Consul, and a roan man, the head of the Department of Mercenary and Licentious
+Dispositions, the way it read upon his sign.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I touch here again a week from to-day,&rsquo; says the captain.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;By that time,&rsquo; we told him, &lsquo;we&rsquo;ll be amassing
+wealth in the interior towns with our galvanized prima donna and correct
+imitations of Sousa&rsquo;s band excavating a march from a tin mine.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Ye&rsquo;ll not,&rsquo; says the captain. &lsquo;Ye&rsquo;ll be
+hypnotized. Any gentleman in the audience who kindly steps upon the stage and
+looks this country in the eye will be converted to the hypothesis that
+he&rsquo;s but a fly in the Elgin creamery. Ye&rsquo;ll be standing knee deep
+in the surf waiting for me, and your machine for making Hamburger steak out of
+the hitherto respected art of music will be playing &ldquo;There&rsquo;s no
+place like home.&rdquo;&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Henry skinned a twenty off his roll, and received from the Bureau of
+Mercenary Dispositions a paper bearing a red seal and a dialect story, and no
+change.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Then we got the consul full of red wine, and struck him for a horoscope.
+He was a thin, youngish kind of man, I should say past fifty, sort of
+French-Irish in his affections, and puffed up with disconsolation. Yes, he was
+a flattened kind of a man, in whom drink lay stagnant, inclined to corpulence
+and misery. Yes, I think he was a kind of Dutchman, being very sad and genial
+in his ways.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;The marvelous invention,&rsquo; he says, &lsquo;entitled the
+phonograph, has never invaded these shores. The people have never heard it.
+They would not believe it if they should. Simple-hearted children of nature,
+progress has never condemned them to accept the work of a can-opener as an
+overture, and rag-time might incite them to a bloody revolution. But you can
+try the experiment. The best chance you have is that the populace may not wake
+up when you play. There&rsquo;s two ways,&rsquo; says the consul, &lsquo;they
+may take it. They may become inebriated with attention, like an Atlanta colonel
+listening to &ldquo;Marching Through Georgia,&rdquo; or they will get excited
+and transpose the key of the music with an axe and yourselves into a dungeon.
+In the latter case,&rsquo; says the consul, &lsquo;I&rsquo;ll do my duty by
+cabling to the State Department, and I&rsquo;ll wrap the Stars and Stripes
+around you when you come to be shot, and threaten them with the vengeance of
+the greatest gold export and financial reserve nation on earth. The flag is
+full of bullet holes now,&rsquo; says the consul, &lsquo;made in that way.
+Twice before,&rsquo; says the consul, &lsquo;I have cabled our government for a
+couple of gunboats to protect American citizens. The first time the Department
+sent me a pair of gum boots. The other time was when a man named Pease was
+going to be executed here. They referred that appeal to the Secretary of
+Agriculture. Let us now disturb the señor behind the bar for a subsequence of
+the red wine.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Thus soliloquized the consul of Solitas to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;But, notwithstanding, we hired a room that afternoon in the Calle de los
+Angeles, the main street that runs along the shore, and put our trunks there.
+&rsquo;Twas a good-sized room, dark and cheerful, but small. &rsquo;Twas on a
+various street, diversified by houses and conservatory plants. The peasantry of
+the city passed to and fro on the fine pasturage between the sidewalks.
+&rsquo;Twas, for the world, like an opera chorus when the Royal Kafoozlum is
+about to enter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We were rubbing the dust off the machine and getting fixed to start
+business the next day, when a big, fine-looking white man in white clothes
+stopped at the door and looked in. We extended the invitations, and he walked
+inside and sized us up. He was chewing a long cigar, and wrinkling his eyes,
+meditative, like a girl trying to decide which dress to wear to the party.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;New York?&rsquo; he says to me finally.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Originally, and from time to time,&rsquo; I says.
+&lsquo;Hasn&rsquo;t it rubbed off yet?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;It&rsquo;s simple,&rsquo; says he, &lsquo;when you know how.
+It&rsquo;s the fit of the vest. They don&rsquo;t cut vests right anywhere else.
+Coats, maybe, but not vests.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The white man looks at Henry Horsecollar and hesitates.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Injun,&rsquo; says Henry; &lsquo;tame Injun.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Mellinger,&rsquo; says the man&mdash;&lsquo;Homer P. Mellinger.
+Boys, you&rsquo;re confiscated. You&rsquo;re babes in the wood without a
+chaperon or referee, and it&rsquo;s my duty to start you going. I&rsquo;ll
+knock out the props and launch you proper in the pellucid waters of this
+tropical mud puddle. You&rsquo;ll have to be christened, and if you&rsquo;ll
+come with me I&rsquo;ll break a bottle of wine across your bows, according to
+Hoyle.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well, for two days Homer P. Mellinger did the honors. That man cut ice
+in Anchuria. He was It. He was the Royal Kafoozlum. If me and Henry was babes
+in the wood, he was a Robin Redbreast from the topmost bough. Him and me and
+Henry Horsecollar locked arms, and toted that phonograph around, and had
+wassail and diversions. Everywhere we found doors open we went inside and set
+the machine going, and Mellinger called upon the people to observe the artful
+music and his two lifelong friends, the Señors Americanos. The opera chorus was
+agitated with esteem, and followed us from house to house. There was a
+different kind of drink to be had with every tune. The natives had acquirements
+of a pleasant thing in the way of a drink that gums itself to the recollection.
+They chop off the end of a green cocoanut, and pour in on the juice of it
+French brandy and other adjuvants. We had them and other things.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Mine and Henry&rsquo;s money was counterfeit. Everything was on Homer P.
+Mellinger. That man could find rolls of bills concealed in places on his person
+where Hermann the Wizard couldn&rsquo;t have conjured out a rabbit or an
+omelette. He could have founded universities, and made orchid collections, and
+then had enough left to purchase the colored vote of his country. Henry and me
+wondered what his graft was. One evening he told us.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Boys,&rsquo; said he, &lsquo;I&rsquo;ve deceived you. You think
+I&rsquo;m a painted butterfly; but in fact I&rsquo;m the hardest worked man in
+this country. Ten years ago I landed on its shores; and two years ago on the
+point of its jaw. Yes, I guess I can get the decision over this ginger cake
+commonwealth at the end of any round I choose. I&rsquo;ll confide in you
+because you are my countrymen and guests, even if you have assaulted my adopted
+shores with the worst system of noises ever set to music.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;My job is private secretary to the president of this republic;
+and my duties are running it. I&rsquo;m not headlined in the bills, but
+I&rsquo;m the mustard in the salad dressing just the same. There isn&rsquo;t a
+law goes before Congress, there isn&rsquo;t a concession granted, there
+isn&rsquo;t an import duty levied but what H. P. Mellinger he cooks and seasons
+it. In the front office I fill the president&rsquo;s inkstand and search
+visiting statesmen for dirks and dynamite; but in the back room I dictate the
+policy of the government. You&rsquo;d never guess in the world how I got my
+pull. It&rsquo;s the only graft of its kind on earth. I&rsquo;ll put you wise.
+You remember the old top-liner in the copy book&mdash;&ldquo;Honesty is the
+Best Policy&rdquo;? That&rsquo;s it. I&rsquo;m working honesty for a graft.
+I&rsquo;m the only honest man in the republic. The government knows it; the
+people know it; the boodlers know it; the foreign investors know it. I make the
+government keep its faith. If a man is promised a job he gets it. If outside
+capital buys a concession it gets the goods. I run a monopoly of square dealing
+here. There&rsquo;s no competition. If Colonel Diogenes were to flash his
+lantern in this precinct he&rsquo;d have my address inside of two minutes.
+There isn&rsquo;t big money in it, but it&rsquo;s a sure thing, and lets a man
+sleep of nights.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Thus Homer P. Mellinger made oration to me and Henry Horsecollar. And,
+later, he divested himself of this remark:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Boys, I&rsquo;m to hold a <i>soirée</i> this evening with a gang
+of leading citizens, and I want your assistance. You bring the musical corn
+sheller and give the affair the outside appearance of a function. There&rsquo;s
+important business on hand, but it mustn&rsquo;t show. I can talk to you
+people. I&rsquo;ve been pained for years on account of not having anybody to
+blow off and brag to. I get homesick sometimes, and I&rsquo;d swap the entire
+perquisites of office for just one hour to have a stein and a caviare sandwich
+somewhere on Thirty-fourth Street, and stand and watch the street cars go by,
+and smell the peanut roaster at old Giuseppe&rsquo;s fruit stand.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Yes,&rsquo; said I, &lsquo;there&rsquo;s fine caviare at Billy
+Renfrew&rsquo;s café, corner of Thirty-fourth and&mdash;&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;God knows it,&rsquo; interrupts Mellinger, &lsquo;and if
+you&rsquo;d told me you knew Billy Renfrew I&rsquo;d have invented tons of ways
+of making you happy. Billy was my side-kicker in New York. There is a man who
+never knew what crooked was. Here I am working Honesty for a graft, but that
+man loses money on it. Carrambos! I get sick at times of this country.
+Everything&rsquo;s rotten. From the executive down to the coffee pickers,
+they&rsquo;re plotting to down each other and skin their friends. If a mule
+driver takes off his hat to an official, that man figures it out that
+he&rsquo;s a popular idol, and sets his pegs to stir up a revolution and upset
+the administration. It&rsquo;s one of my little chores as private secretary to
+smell out these revolutions and affix the kibosh before they break out and
+scratch the paint off the government property. That&rsquo;s why I&rsquo;m down
+here now in this mildewed coast town. The governor of the district and his crew
+are plotting to uprise. I&rsquo;ve got every one of their names, and
+they&rsquo;re invited to listen to the phonograph to-night, compliments of H.
+P. M. That&rsquo;s the way I&rsquo;ll get them in a bunch, and things are on
+the programme to happen to them.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We three were sitting at table in the cantina of the Purified Saints.
+Mellinger poured out wine, and was looking some worried; I was thinking.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;They&rsquo;re a sharp crowd,&rsquo; he says, kind of fretful.
+&lsquo;They&rsquo;re capitalized by a foreign syndicate after rubber, and
+they&rsquo;re loaded to the muzzle for bribing. I&rsquo;m sick,&rsquo; goes on
+Mellinger, &lsquo;of comic opera. I want to smell East River and wear
+suspenders again. At times I feel like throwing up my job, but I&rsquo;m
+d&mdash;&mdash;n fool enough to be sort of proud of it. &ldquo;There&rsquo;s
+Mellinger,&rdquo; they say here. &ldquo;<i>Por Dios!</i> you can&rsquo;t touch
+him with a million.&rdquo; I&rsquo;d like to take that record back and show it
+to Billy Renfrew some day; and that tightens my grip whenever I see a fat thing
+that I could corral just by winking one eye&mdash;and losing my graft. By
+&mdash;&mdash;, they can&rsquo;t monkey with me. They know it. What money I get
+I make honest and spend it. Some day I&rsquo;ll make a pile and go back and eat
+caviare with Billy. To-night I&rsquo;ll show you how to handle a bunch of
+corruptionists. I&rsquo;ll show them what Mellinger, private secretary, means
+when you spell it with the cotton and tissue paper off.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Mellinger appears shaky, and breaks his glass against the neck of the
+bottle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I says to myself, &lsquo;White man, if I&rsquo;m not mistaken
+there&rsquo;s been a bait laid out where the tail of your eye could see
+it.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That night, according to arrangements, me and Henry took the phonograph
+to a room in a &rsquo;dobe house in a dirty side street, where the grass was
+knee high. &rsquo;Twas a long room, lit with smoky oil lamps. There was plenty
+of chairs, and a table at the back end. We set the phonograph on the table.
+Mellinger was there, walking up and down, disturbed in his predicaments. He
+chewed cigars and spat &rsquo;em out, and he bit the thumb nail of his left
+hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;By and by the invitations to the musicale came sliding in by pairs and
+threes and spade flushes. Their colour was of a diversity, running from a
+three-days&rsquo; smoked meerschaum to a patent-leather polish. They were as
+polite as wax, being devastated with enjoyments to give Señor Mellinger the
+good evenings. I understood their Spanish talk&mdash;I ran a pumping engine two
+years in a Mexican silver mine, and had it pat&mdash;but I never let on.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Maybe fifty of &rsquo;em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king
+bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door, and escorted
+him to the grand stand. When I saw that Latin man I knew that Mellinger,
+private secretary, had all the dances on his card taken. That was a big,
+squashy man, the colour of a rubber overshoe, and he had an eye like a head
+waiter&rsquo;s.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Mellinger explained, fluent, in the Castilian idioms, that his soul was
+disconcerted with joy at introducing to his respected friends America&rsquo;s
+greatest invention, the wonder of the age. Henry got the cue and run on an
+elegant brass-band record and the festivities became initiated. The governor
+man had a bit of English under his hat, and when the music was choked off he
+says:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Ver-r-ree fine. <i>Gr-r-r-r-racias</i>, the American gentleemen,
+the so esplendeed moosic as to playee.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The table was a long one, and Henry and me sat at the end of it next the
+wall. The governor sat at the other end. Homer P. Mellinger stood at the side
+of it. I was just wondering how Mellinger was going to handle his crowd, when
+the home talent suddenly opened the services.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That governor man was suitable for uprisings and policies. I judge he
+was a ready kind of man, who took his own time. Yes, he was full of attention
+and immediateness. He leaned his hands on the table and imposed his face toward
+the secretary man.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Do the American señors understand Spanish?&rsquo; he asks in his
+native accents.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;They do not,&rsquo; says Mellinger.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Then listen,&rsquo; goes on the Latin man, prompt. &lsquo;The
+musics are of sufficient prettiness, but not of necessity. Let us speak of
+business. I well know why we are here, since I observe my compatriots. You had
+a whisper yesterday, Señor Mellinger, of our proposals. To-night we will speak
+out. We know that you stand in the president&rsquo;s favour, and we know your
+influence. The government will be changed. We know the worth of your services.
+We esteem your friendship and aid so much that&rsquo;&mdash;Mellinger raises
+his hand, but the governor man bottles him up. &lsquo;Do not speak until I have
+done.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The governor man then draws a package wrapped in paper from his pocket,
+and lays it on the table by Mellinger&rsquo;s hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;In that you will find fifty thousand dollars in money of your
+country. You can do nothing against us, but you can be worth that for us. Go
+back to the capital and obey our instructions. Take that money now. We trust
+you. You will find with it a paper giving in detail the work you will be
+expected to do for us. Do not have the unwiseness to refuse.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The governor man paused, with his eyes fixed on Mellinger, full of
+expressions and observances. I looked at Mellinger, and was glad Billy Renfrew
+couldn&rsquo;t see him then. The sweat was popping out on his forehead, and he
+stood dumb, tapping the little package with the ends of his fingers. The
+colorado-maduro gang was after his graft. He had only to change his politics,
+and stuff five fingers in his inside pocket.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Henry whispers to me and wants the pause in the programme interpreted. I
+whisper back: &lsquo;H. P. is up against a bribe, senator&rsquo;s size, and the
+coons have got him going.&rsquo; I saw Mellinger&rsquo;s hand moving closer to
+the package. &lsquo;He&rsquo;s weakening,&rsquo; I whispered to Henry.
+&lsquo;We&rsquo;ll remind him,&rsquo; says Henry, &lsquo;of the peanut-roaster
+on Thirty-fourth Street, New York.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Henry stooped down and got a record from the basketful we&rsquo;d
+brought, slid it in the phonograph, and started her off. It was a cornet solo,
+very neat and beautiful, and the name of it was &lsquo;Home, Sweet Home.&rsquo;
+Not one of them fifty odd men in the room moved while it was playing, and the
+governor man kept his eyes steady on Mellinger. I saw Mellinger&rsquo;s head go
+up little by little, and his hand came creeping away from the package. Not
+until the last note sounded did anybody stir. And then Homer P. Mellinger takes
+up the bundle of boodle and slams it in the governor man&rsquo;s face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;That&rsquo;s my answer,&rsquo; says Mellinger, private secretary,
+&lsquo;and there&rsquo;ll be another in the morning. I have proofs of
+conspiracy against every man of you. The show is over, gentlemen.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;There&rsquo;s one more act,&rsquo; puts in the governor man.
+&lsquo;You are a servant, I believe, employed by the president to copy letters
+and answer raps at the door. I am governor here. <i>Señores</i>, I call upon
+you in the name of the cause to seize this man.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That brindled gang of conspirators shoved back their chairs and advanced
+in force. I could see where Mellinger had made a mistake in massing his enemy
+so as to make a grand-stand play. I think he made another one, too; but we can
+pass that, Mellinger&rsquo;s idea of a graft and mine being different,
+according to estimations and points of view.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;There was only one window and door in that room, and they were in the
+front end. Here was fifty odd Latin men coming in a bunch to obstruct the
+legislation of Mellinger. You may say there were three of us, for me and Henry,
+simultaneous, declared New York City and the Cherokee Nation in sympathy with
+the weaker party.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Then it was that Henry Horsecollar rose to a point of disorder and
+intervened, showing, admirable, the advantages of education as applied to the
+American Indian&rsquo;s natural intellect and native refinement. He stood up
+and smoothed back his hair on each side with his hands as you have seen little
+girls do when they play.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Get behind me, both of you,&rsquo; says Henry.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;What&rsquo;s it to be, chief?&rsquo; I asked.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I&rsquo;m going to buck centre,&rsquo; says Henry, in his
+football idioms. &lsquo;There isn&rsquo;t a tackle in the lot of them. Follow
+me close, and rush the game.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Then that cultured Red Man exhaled an arrangement of sounds with his
+mouth that made the Latin aggregation pause, with thoughtfulness and
+hesitations. The matter of his proclamation seemed to be a co-operation of the
+Carlisle war-whoop with the Cherokee college yell. He went at the chocolate
+team like a bean out of a little boy&rsquo;s nigger shooter. His right elbow
+laid out the governor man on the gridiron, and he made a lane the length of the
+crowd so wide that a woman could have carried a step-ladder through it without
+striking against anything. All Mellinger and me had to do was to follow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It took us just three minutes to get out of that street around to
+military headquarters, where Mellinger had things his own way. A colonel and a
+battalion of bare-toed infantry turned out and went back to the scene of the
+musicale with us, but the conspirator gang was gone. But we recaptured the
+phonograph with honours of war, and marched back to the <i>cuartel</i> with it
+playing &lsquo;All Coons Look Alike to Me.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The next day Mellinger takes me and Henry to one side, and begins to
+shed tens and twenties.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I want to buy that phonograph,&rsquo; says he. &lsquo;I liked
+that last tune it played at the <i>soirée</i>.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;This is more money than the machine is worth,&rsquo; says I.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;&rsquo;Tis government expense money,&rsquo; says Mellinger.
+&lsquo;The government pays for it, and it&rsquo;s getting the tune-grinder
+cheap.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Me and Henry knew that pretty well. We knew that it had saved Homer P.
+Mellinger&rsquo;s graft when he was on the point of losing it; but we never let
+him know we knew it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Now you boys better slide off further down the coast for a
+while,&rsquo; says Mellinger, &lsquo;till I get the screws put on these fellows
+here. If you don&rsquo;t they&rsquo;ll give you trouble. And if you ever happen
+to see Billy Renfrew again before I do, tell him I&rsquo;m coming back to New
+York as soon as I can make a stake&mdash;honest.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Me and Henry laid low until the day the steamer came back. When we saw
+the captain&rsquo;s boat on the beach we went down and stood in the edge of the
+water. The captain grinned when he saw us.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I told you you&rsquo;d be waiting,&rsquo; he says.
+&lsquo;Where&rsquo;s the Hamburger machine?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;It stays behind,&rsquo; I says, &lsquo;to play &ldquo;Home, Sweet
+Home.&rdquo;&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I told you so,&rsquo; says the captain again. &lsquo;Climb in the
+boat.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;And that,&rdquo; said Keogh, &ldquo;is the way me and Henry Horsecollar
+introduced the phonograph into this country. Henry went back to the States, but
+I&rsquo;ve been rummaging around in the tropics ever since. They say Mellinger
+never travelled a mile after that without his phonograph. I guess it kept him
+reminded about his graft whenever he saw the siren voice of the boodler tip him
+the wink with a bribe in its hand.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I suppose he&rsquo;s taking it home with him as a souvenir,&rdquo;
+remarked the consul.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not as a souvenir,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;He&rsquo;ll need two of
+&rsquo;em in New York, running day and night.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap07"></a>VII<br/>
+MONEY MAZE</h2>
+
+<p>
+The new administration of Anchuria entered upon its duties and privileges with
+enthusiasm. Its first act was to send an agent to Coralio with imperative
+orders to recover, if possible, the sum of money ravished from the treasury by
+the ill-fated Miraflores.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Emilio Falcon, the private secretary of Losada, the new president, was
+despatched from the capital upon this important mission.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The position of private secretary to a tropical president is a responsible one.
+He must be a diplomat, a spy, a ruler of men, a body-guard to his chief, and a
+smeller-out of plots and nascent revolutions. Often he is the power behind the
+throne, the dictator of policy; and a president chooses him with a dozen times
+the care with which he selects a matrimonial mate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Falcon, a handsome and urbane gentleman of Castilian courtesy and
+débonnaire manners, came to Coralio with the task before him of striking upon
+the cold trail of the lost money. There he conferred with the military
+authorities, who had received instructions to co-operate with him in the
+search.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Falcon established his headquarters in one of the rooms of the Casa
+Morena. Here for a week he held informal sittings&mdash;much as if he were a
+kind of unified grand jury&mdash;and summoned before him all those whose
+testimony might illumine the financial tragedy that had accompanied the less
+momentous one of the late president&rsquo;s death.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Two or three who were thus examined, among whom was the barber Estebán,
+declared that they had identified the body of the president before its burial.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Of a truth,&rdquo; testified Estebán before the mighty secretary,
+&ldquo;it was he, the president. Consider!&mdash;how could I shave a man and
+not see his face? He sent for me to shave him in a small house. He had a beard
+very black and thick. Had I ever seen the president before? Why not? I saw him
+once ride forth in a carriage from the <i>vapor</i> in Solitas. When I shaved
+him he gave me a gold piece, and said there was to be no talk. But I am a
+Liberal&mdash;I am devoted to my country&mdash;and I spake of these things to
+Señor Goodwin.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It is known,&rdquo; said Colonel Falcon, smoothly, &ldquo;that the late
+President took with him an American leather valise, containing a large amount
+of money. Did you see that?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>De veras</i>&mdash;no,&rdquo; Estebán answered. &ldquo;The light in
+the little house was but a small lamp by which I could scarcely see to shave
+the President. Such a thing there may have been, but I did not see it. No. Also
+in the room was a young lady&mdash;a señorita of much beauty&mdash;that I could
+see even in so small a light. But the money, señor, or the thing in which it
+was carried&mdash;that I did not see.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The <i>comandante</i> and other officers gave testimony that they had been
+awakened and alarmed by the noise of a pistol-shot in the Hotel de los
+Estranjeros. Hurrying thither to protect the peace and dignity of the republic,
+they found a man lying dead, with a pistol clutched in his hand. Beside him was
+a young woman, weeping sorely. Señor Goodwin was also in the room when they
+entered it. But of the valise of money they saw nothing.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Madame Timotea Ortiz, the proprietress of the hotel in which the game of
+Fox-in-the-Morning had been played out, told of the coming of the two guests to
+her house.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;To my house they came,&rdquo; said she&mdash;&ldquo;one <i>señor</i>,
+not quite old, and one <i>señorita</i> of sufficient handsomeness. They desired
+not to eat or to drink&mdash;not even of my <i>aguardiente</i>, which is the
+best. To their rooms they ascended&mdash;<i>Numero Nueve</i> and <i>Numero
+Diez</i>. Later came Señor Goodwin, who ascended to speak with them. Then I
+heard a great noise like that of a <i>canon</i>, and they said that the
+<i>pobre Presidente</i> had shot himself. <i>Está bueno.</i> I saw nothing of
+money or of the thing you call <i>veliz</i> that you say he carried it
+in.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Falcon soon came to the reasonable conclusion that if anyone in Coralio
+could furnish a clue to the vanished money, Frank Goodwin must be the man. But
+the wise secretary pursued a different course in seeking information from the
+American. Goodwin was a powerful friend to the new administration, and one who
+was not to be carelessly dealt with in respect to either his honesty or his
+courage. Even the private secretary of His Excellency hesitated to have this
+rubber prince and mahogany baron haled before him as a common citizen of
+Anchuria. So he sent Goodwin a flowery epistle, each word-petal dripping with
+honey, requesting the favour of an interview. Goodwin replied with an
+invitation to dinner at his own house.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Before the hour named the American walked over to the Casa Morena, and greeted
+his guest frankly and friendly. Then the two strolled, in the cool of the
+afternoon, to Goodwin&rsquo;s home in the environs.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The American left Colonel Falcon in a big, cool, shadowed room with a floor of
+inlaid and polished woods that any millionaire in the States would have envied,
+excusing himself for a few minutes. He crossed a <i>patio</i>, shaded with
+deftly arranged awnings and plants, and entered a long room looking upon the
+sea in the opposite wing of the house. The broad jalousies were opened wide,
+and the ocean breeze flowed in through the room, an invisible current of
+coolness and health. Goodwin&rsquo;s wife sat near one of the windows, making a
+water-color sketch of the afternoon seascape.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Here was a woman who looked to be happy. And more&mdash;she looked to be
+content. Had a poet been inspired to pen just similes concerning her favour, he
+would have likened her full, clear eyes, with their white-encircled, gray
+irises, to moonflowers. With none of the goddesses whose traditional charms
+have become coldly classic would the discerning rhymester have compared her.
+She was purely Paradisaic, not Olympian. If you can imagine Eve, after the
+eviction, beguiling the flaming warriors and serenely re-entering the Garden,
+you will have her. Just so human, and still so harmonious with Eden seemed Mrs.
+Goodwin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When her husband entered she looked up, and her lips curved and parted; her
+eyelids fluttered twice or thrice&mdash;a movement remindful (Poesy forgive
+us!) of the tail-wagging of a faithful dog&mdash;and a little ripple went
+through her like the commotion set up in a weeping willow by a puff of wind.
+Thus she ever acknowledged his coming, were it twenty times a day. If they who
+sometimes sat over their wine in Coralio, reshaping old, diverting stories of
+the madcap career of Isabel Guilbert, could have seen the wife of Frank Goodwin
+that afternoon in the estimable aura of her happy wifehood, they might have
+disbelieved, or have agreed to forget, those graphic annals of the life of the
+one for whom their president gave up his country and his honour.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I have brought a guest to dinner,&rdquo; said Goodwin. &ldquo;One
+Colonel Falcon, from San Mateo. He is come on government business. I do not
+think you will care to see him, so I prescribe for you one of those convenient
+and indisputable feminine headaches.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;He has come to inquire about the lost money, has he not?&rdquo; asked
+Mrs. Goodwin, going on with her sketch.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;A good guess!&rdquo; acknowledged Goodwin. &ldquo;He has been holding an
+inquisition among the natives for three days. I am next on his list of
+witnesses, but as he feels shy about dragging one of Uncle Sam&rsquo;s subjects
+before him, he consents to give it the outward appearance of a social function.
+He will apply the torture over my own wine and provender.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Has he found anyone who saw the valise of money?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not a soul. Even Madama Ortiz, whose eyes are so sharp for the sight of
+a revenue official, does not remember that there was any baggage.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mrs. Goodwin laid down her brush and sighed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I am so sorry, Frank,&rdquo; she said, &ldquo;that they are giving you
+so much trouble about the money. But we can&rsquo;t let them know about it, can
+we?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not without doing our intelligence a great injustice,&rdquo; said
+Goodwin, with a smile and a shrug that he had picked up from the natives.
+&ldquo;<i>Americano</i>, though I am, they would have me in the <i>calaboza</i>
+in half an hour if they knew we had appropriated that valise. No; we must
+appear as ignorant about the money as the other ignoramuses in Coralio.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Do you think that this man they have sent suspects you?&rdquo; she
+asked, with a little pucker of her brows.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;He&rsquo;d better not,&rdquo; said the American, carelessly.
+&ldquo;It&rsquo;s lucky that no one caught a sight of the valise except myself.
+As I was in the rooms when the shot was fired, it is not surprising that they
+should want to investigate my part in the affair rather closely. But
+there&rsquo;s no cause for alarm. This colonel is down on the list of events
+for a good dinner, with a dessert of American &lsquo;bluff&rsquo; that will end
+the matter, I think.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mrs. Goodwin rose and walked to the window. Goodwin followed and stood by her
+side. She leaned to him, and rested in the protection of his strength, as she
+had always rested since that dark night on which he had first made himself her
+tower of refuge. Thus they stood for a little while.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Straight through the lavish growth of tropical branch and leaf and vine that
+confronted them had been cunningly trimmed a vista, that ended at the cleared
+environs of Coralio, on the banks of the mangrove swamp. At the other end of
+the aerial tunnel they could see the grave and wooden headpiece that bore the
+name of the unhappy President Miraflores. From this window when the rains
+forbade the open, and from the green and shady slopes of Goodwin&rsquo;s
+fruitful lands when the skies were smiling, his wife was wont to look upon that
+grave with a gentle sadness that was now scarcely a mar to her happiness.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I loved him so, Frank!&rdquo; she said, &ldquo;even after that terrible
+flight and its awful ending. And you have been so good to me, and have made me
+so happy. It has all grown into such a strange puzzle. If they were to find out
+that we got the money do you think they would force you to make the amount good
+to the government?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They would undoubtedly try,&rdquo; answered Goodwin. &ldquo;You are
+right about its being a puzzle. And it must remain a puzzle to Falcon and all
+his countrymen until it solves itself. You and I, who know more than anyone
+else, only know half of the solution. We must not let even a hint about this
+money get abroad. Let them come to the theory that the president concealed it
+in the mountains during his journey, or that he found means to ship it out of
+the country before he reached Coralio. I don&rsquo;t think that Falcon suspects
+me. He is making a close investigation, according to his orders, but he will
+find out nothing.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Thus they spake together. Had anyone overheard or overseen them as they
+discussed the lost funds of Anchuria there would have been a second puzzle
+presented. For upon the faces and in the bearing of each of them was visible
+(if countenances are to be believed) Saxon honesty and pride and honourable
+thoughts. In Goodwin&rsquo;s steady eye and firm lineaments, moulded into
+material shape by the inward spirit of kindness and generosity and courage,
+there was nothing reconcilable with his words.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As for his wife, physiognomy championed her even in the face of their accusive
+talk. Nobility was in her guise; purity was in her glance. The devotion that
+she manifested had not even the appearance of that feeling that now and then
+inspires a woman to share the guilt of her partner out of the pathetic
+greatness of her love. No, there was a discrepancy here between what the eye
+would have seen and the ear have heard.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dinner was served to Goodwin and his guest in the <i>patio</i>, under cool
+foliage and flowers. The American begged the illustrious secretary to excuse
+the absence of Mrs. Goodwin, who was suffering, he said, from a headache
+brought on by a slight <i>calentura</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After the meal they lingered, according to the custom, over their coffee and
+cigars. Colonel Falcon, with true Castilian delicacy, waited for his host to
+open the question that they had met to discuss. He had not long to wait. As
+soon as the cigars were lighted, the American cleared the way by inquiring
+whether the secretary&rsquo;s investigations in the town had furnished him with
+any clue to the lost funds.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I have found no one yet,&rdquo; admitted Colonel Falcon, &ldquo;who even
+had sight of the valise or the money. Yet I have persisted. It has been proven
+in the capital that President Miraflores set out from San Mateo with one
+hundred thousand dollars belonging to the government, accompanied by
+<i>Señorita</i> Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer. The Government, officially
+and personally, is loath to believe,&rdquo; concluded Colonel Falcon, with a
+smile, &ldquo;that our late President&rsquo;s tastes would have permitted him
+to abandon on the route, as excess baggage, either of the desirable articles
+with which his flight was burdened.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I suppose you would like to hear what I have to say about the
+affair,&rdquo; said Goodwin, coming directly to the point. &ldquo;It will not
+require many words.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;On that night, with others of our friends here, I was keeping a lookout
+for the president, having been notified of his flight by a telegram in our
+national cipher from Englehart, one of our leaders in the capital. About ten
+o&rsquo;clock that night I saw a man and a woman hurrying along the streets.
+They went to the Hotel de los Estranjeros, and engaged rooms. I followed them
+upstairs, leaving Estebán, who had come up, to watch outside. The barber had
+told me that he had shaved the beard from the president&rsquo;s face that
+night; therefore I was prepared, when I entered the rooms, to find him with a
+smooth face. When I apprehended him in the name of the people he drew a pistol
+and shot himself instantly. In a few minutes many officers and citizens were on
+the spot. I suppose you have been informed of the subsequent facts.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin paused. Losada&rsquo;s agent maintained an attitude of waiting, as if
+he expected a continuance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;And now,&rdquo; went on the American, looking steadily into the eyes of
+the other man, and giving each word a deliberate emphasis, &ldquo;you will
+oblige me by attending carefully to what I have to add. I saw no valise or
+receptacle of any kind, or any money belonging to the Republic of Anchuria. If
+President Miraflores decamped with any funds belonging to the treasury of this
+country, or to himself, or to anyone else, I saw no trace of it in the house or
+elsewhere, at that time or at any other. Does that statement cover the ground
+of the inquiry you wished to make of me?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Falcon bowed, and described a fluent curve with his cigar. His duty was
+performed. Goodwin was not to be disputed. He was a loyal supporter of the
+government, and enjoyed the full confidence of the new president. His rectitude
+had been the capital that had brought him fortune in Anchuria, just as it had
+formed the lucrative &ldquo;graft&rdquo; of Mellinger, the secretary of
+Miraflores.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I thank you, <i>Señor</i> Goodwin,&rdquo; said Falcon, &ldquo;for
+speaking plainly. Your word will be sufficient for the president. But,
+<i>Señor</i> Goodwin, I am instructed to pursue every clue that presents itself
+in this matter. There is one that I have not yet touched upon. Our friends in
+France, <i>señor</i>, have a saying, &lsquo;<i>Cherchez la femme</i>,&rsquo;
+when there is a mystery without a clue. But here we do not have to search. The
+woman who accompanied the late President in his flight must
+surely&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I must interrupt you there,&rdquo; interposed Goodwin. &ldquo;It is true
+that when I entered the hotel for the purpose of intercepting President
+Miraflores I found a lady there. I must beg of you to remember that that lady
+is now my wife. I speak for her as I do for myself. She knows nothing of the
+fate of the valise or of the money that you are seeking. You will say to his
+excellency that I guarantee her innocence. I do not need to add to you, Colonel
+Falcon, that I do not care to have her questioned or disturbed.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Falcon bowed again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Por supuesto</i>, no!&rdquo; he cried. And to indicate that the
+inquiry was ended he added: &ldquo;And now, <i>señor</i>, let me beg of you to
+show me that sea view from your <i>galeria</i> of which you spoke. I am a lover
+of the sea.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the early evening Goodwin walked back to the town with his guest, leaving
+him at the corner of the Calle Grande. As he was returning homeward one
+&ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; Blythe, with the air of a courtier and the outward
+aspect of a scarecrow, pounced upon him hopefully from the door of a
+<i>pulperia</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Blythe had been re-christened &ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; as an acknowledgment of
+the greatness of his fall. Once in some distant Paradise Lost, he had
+foregathered with the angels of the earth. But Fate had hurled him headlong
+down to the tropics, where flamed in his bosom a fire that was seldom quenched.
+In Coralio they called him a beachcomber; but he was, in reality, a categorical
+idealist who strove to anamorphosize the dull verities of life by the means of
+brandy and rum. As Beelzebub, himself, might have held in his clutch with
+unwitting tenacity his harp or crown during his tremendous fall, so his
+namesake had clung to his gold-rimmed eyeglasses as the only souvenir of his
+lost estate. These he wore with impressiveness and distinction while he combed
+beaches and extracted toll from his friends. By some mysterious means he kept
+his drink-reddened face always smoothly shaven. For the rest he sponged
+gracefully upon whomsoever he could for enough to keep him pretty drunk, and
+sheltered from the rains and night dews.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Hallo, Goodwin!&rdquo; called the derelict, airily. &ldquo;I was hoping
+I&rsquo;d strike you. I wanted to see you particularly. Suppose we go where we
+can talk. Of course you know there&rsquo;s a chap down here looking up the
+money old Miraflores lost.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Yes,&rdquo; said Goodwin, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been talking with him.
+Let&rsquo;s go into Espada&rsquo;s place. I can spare you ten minutes.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They went into the <i>pulperia</i> and sat at a little table upon stools with
+rawhide tops.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Have a drink?&rdquo; said Goodwin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They can&rsquo;t bring it too quickly,&rdquo; said Blythe.
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;ve been in a drought ever since morning.
+Hi&mdash;<i>muchacho!&mdash;el aguardiente por acá</i>.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Now, what do you want to see me about?&rdquo; asked Goodwin, when the
+drinks were before them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Confound it, old man,&rdquo; drawled Blythe, &ldquo;why do you spoil a
+golden moment like this with business? I wanted to see you&mdash;well, this has
+the preference.&rdquo; He gulped down his brandy, and gazed longingly into the
+empty glass.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Have another?&rdquo; suggested Goodwin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Between gentlemen,&rdquo; said the fallen angel, &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t
+quite like your use of that word &lsquo;another.&rsquo; It isn&rsquo;t quite
+delicate. But the concrete idea that the word represents is not
+displeasing.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The glasses were refilled. Blythe sipped blissfully from his, as he began to
+enter the state of a true idealist.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I must trot along in a minute or two,&rdquo; hinted Goodwin. &ldquo;Was
+there anything in particular?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Blythe did not reply at once.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Old Losada would make it a hot country,&rdquo; he remarked at length,
+&ldquo;for the man who swiped that gripsack of treasury boodle, don&rsquo;t you
+think?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Undoubtedly, he would,&rdquo; agreed Goodwin calmly, as he rose
+leisurely to his feet. &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll be running over to the house now, old
+man. Mrs. Goodwin is alone. There was nothing important you had to say, was
+there?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s all,&rdquo; said Blythe. &ldquo;Unless you wouldn&rsquo;t
+mind sending in another drink from the bar as you go out. Old Espada has closed
+my account to profit and loss. And pay for the lot, will you, like a good
+fellow?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;All right,&rdquo; said Goodwin. &ldquo;<i>Buenas noches.</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; Blythe lingered over his cups, polishing his eyeglasses
+with a disreputable handkerchief.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I thought I could do it, but I couldn&rsquo;t,&rdquo; he muttered to
+himself after a time. &ldquo;A gentleman can&rsquo;t blackmail the man that he
+drinks with.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap08"></a>VIII<br/>
+THE ADMIRAL</h2>
+
+<p>
+Spilled milk draws few tears from an Anchurian administration. Many are its
+lacteal sources; and the clocks&rsquo; hands point forever to milking time.
+Even the rich cream skimmed from the treasury by the bewitched Miraflores did
+not cause the newly-installed patriots to waste time in unprofitable regrets.
+The government philosophically set about supplying the deficiency by increasing
+the import duties and by &ldquo;suggesting&rdquo; to wealthy private citizens
+that contributions according to their means would be considered patriotic and
+in order. Prosperity was expected to attend the reign of Losada, the new
+president. The ousted office-holders and military favourites organized a new
+&ldquo;Liberal&rdquo; party, and began to lay their plans for a re-succession.
+Thus the game of Anchurian politics began, like a Chinese comedy, to unwind
+slowly its serial length. Here and there Mirth peeps for an instant from the
+wings and illumines the florid lines.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A dozen quarts of champagne in conjunction with an informal sitting of the
+president and his cabinet led to the establishment of the navy and the
+appointment of Felipe Carrera as its admiral.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Next to the champagne the credit of the appointment belongs to Don Sabas
+Placido, the newly confirmed Minister of War.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The president had requested a convention of his cabinet for the discussion of
+questions politic and for the transaction of certain routine matters of state.
+The session had been signally tedious; the business and the wine prodigiously
+dry. A sudden, prankish humour of Don Sabas, impelling him to the deed, spiced
+the grave affairs of state with a whiff of agreeable playfulness.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the dilatory order of business had come a bulletin from the coast department
+of Orilla del Mar reporting the seizure by the custom-house officers at the
+town of Coralio of the sloop <i>Estrella del Noche</i> and her cargo of
+drygoods, patent medicines, granulated sugar and three-star brandy. Also six
+Martini rifles and a barrel of American whisky. Caught in the act of smuggling,
+the sloop with its cargo was now, according to law, the property of the
+republic.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Collector of Customs, in making his report, departed from the conventional
+forms so far as to suggest that the confiscated vessel be converted to the use
+of the government. The prize was the first capture to the credit of the
+department in ten years. The collector took opportunity to pat his department
+on the back.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It often happened that government officers required transportation from point
+to point along the coast, and means were usually lacking. Furthermore, the
+sloop could be manned by a loyal crew and employed as a coast guard to
+discourage the pernicious art of smuggling. The collector also ventured to
+nominate one to whom the charge of the boat could be safely intrusted&mdash;a
+young man of Coralio, Felipe Carrera&mdash;not, be it understood, one of
+extreme wisdom, but loyal and the best sailor along the coast.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was upon this hint that the Minister of War acted, executing a rare piece of
+drollery that so enlivened the tedium of executive session.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the constitution of this small, maritime banana republic was a forgotten
+section that provided for the maintenance of a navy. This provision&mdash;with
+many other wiser ones&mdash;had lain inert since the establishment of the
+republic. Anchuria had no navy and had no use for one. It was characteristic of
+Don Sabas&mdash;a man at once merry, learned, whimsical and
+audacious&mdash;that he should have disturbed the dust of this musty and
+sleeping statute to increase the humour of the world by so much as a smile from
+his indulgent colleagues.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+With delightful mock seriousness the Minister of War proposed the creation of a
+navy. He argued its need and the glories it might achieve with such gay and
+witty zeal that the travesty overcame with its humour even the swart dignity of
+President Losada himself.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The champagne was bubbling trickily in the veins of the mercurial statesmen. It
+was not the custom of the grave governors of Anchuria to enliven their sessions
+with a beverage so apt to cast a veil of disparagement over sober affairs. The
+wine had been a thoughtful compliment tendered by the agent of the Vesuvius
+Fruit Company as a token of amicable relations&mdash;and certain consummated
+deals&mdash;between that company and the republic of Anchuria.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The jest was carried to its end. A formidable, official document was prepared,
+encrusted with chromatic seals and jaunty with fluttering ribbons, bearing the
+florid signatures of state. This commission conferred upon el Señor Don Felipe
+Carrera the title of Flag Admiral of the Republic of Anchuria. Thus within the
+space of a few minutes and the dominion of a dozen &ldquo;extra dry,&rdquo; the
+country took its place among the naval powers of the world, and Felipe Carrera
+became entitled to a salute of nineteen guns whenever he might enter port.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The southern races are lacking in that particular kind of humour that finds
+entertainment in the defects and misfortunes bestowed by Nature. Owing to this
+defect in their constitution they are not moved to laughter (as are their
+northern brothers) by the spectacle of the deformed, the feeble-minded or the
+insane.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Felipe Carrera was sent upon earth with but half his wits. Therefore, the
+people of Coralio called him &ldquo;<i>El pobrecito
+loco</i>&rdquo;&mdash;&ldquo;the poor little crazed one&rdquo;&mdash;saying
+that God had sent but half of him to earth, retaining the other half.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A sombre youth, glowering, and speaking only at the rarest times, Felipe was
+but negatively &ldquo;loco.&rdquo; On shore he generally refused all
+conversation. He seemed to know that he was badly handicapped on land, where so
+many kinds of understanding are needed; but on the water his one talent set him
+equal with most men. Few sailors whom God had carefully and completely made
+could handle a sailboat as well. Five points nearer the wind than even the best
+of them he could sail his sloop. When the elements raged and set other men to
+cowering, the deficiencies of Felipe seemed of little importance. He was a
+perfect sailor, if an imperfect man. He owned no boat, but worked among the
+crews of the schooners and sloops that skimmed the coast, trading and
+freighting fruit out to the steamers where there was no harbour. It was through
+his famous skill and boldness on the sea, as well as for the pity felt for his
+mental imperfections, that he was recommended by the collector as a suitable
+custodian of the captured sloop.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the outcome of Don Sabas&rsquo; little pleasantry arrived in the form of
+the imposing and preposterous commission, the collector smiled. He had not
+expected such prompt and overwhelming response to his recommendation. He
+despatched a <i>muchacho</i> at once to fetch the future admiral.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The collector waited in his official quarters. His office was in the Calle
+Grande, and the sea breezes hummed through its windows all day. The collector,
+in white linen and canvas shoes, philandered with papers on an antique desk. A
+parrot, perched on a pen rack, seasoned the official tedium with a fire of
+choice Castilian imprecations. Two rooms opened into the collector&rsquo;s. In
+one the clerical force of young men of variegated complexions transacted with
+glitter and parade their several duties. Through the open door of the other
+room could be seen a bronze babe, guiltless of clothing, that rollicked upon
+the floor. In a grass hammock a thin woman, tinted a pale lemon, played a
+guitar and swung contentedly in the breeze. Thus surrounded by the routine of
+his high duties and the visible tokens of agreeable domesticity, the
+collector&rsquo;s heart was further made happy by the power placed in his hands
+to brighten the fortunes of the &ldquo;innocent&rdquo; Felipe.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Felipe came and stood before the collector. He was a lad of twenty, not
+ill-favoured in looks, but with an expression of distant and pondering vacuity.
+He wore white cotton trousers, down the seams of which he had sewed red stripes
+with some vague aim at military decoration. A flimsy blue shirt fell open at
+his throat; his feet were bare; he held in his hand the cheapest of straw hats
+from the States.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Señor Carrera,&rdquo; said the collector, gravely, producing the showy
+commission, &ldquo;I have sent for you at the president&rsquo;s bidding. This
+document that I present to you confers upon you the title of Admiral of this
+great republic, and gives you absolute command of the naval forces and fleet of
+our country. You may think, friend Felipe, that we have no navy&mdash;but yes!
+The sloop the <i>Estrella del Noche</i>, that my brave men captured from the
+coast smugglers, is to be placed under your command. The boat is to be devoted
+to the services of your country. You will be ready at all times to convey
+officials of the government to points along the coast where they may be obliged
+to visit. You will also act as a coast-guard to prevent, as far as you may be
+able, the crime of smuggling. You will uphold the honour and prestige of your
+country at sea, and endeavour to place Anchuria among the proudest naval powers
+of the world. These are your instructions as the Minister of War desires me to
+convey them to you. <i>Por Dios!</i> I do not know how all this is to be
+accomplished, for not one word did his letter contain in respect to a crew or
+to the expenses of this navy. Perhaps you are to provide a crew yourself, Señor
+Admiral&mdash;I do not know&mdash;but it is a very high honour that has
+descended upon you. I now hand you your commission. When you are ready for the
+boat I will give orders that she shall be made over into your charge. That is
+as far as my instructions go.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Felipe took the commission that the collector handed to him. He gazed through
+the open window at the sea for a moment, with his customary expression of deep
+but vain pondering. Then he turned without having spoken a word, and walked
+swiftly away through the hot sand of the street.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Pobrecito loco!</i>&rdquo; sighed the collector; and the parrot on
+the pen racks screeched &ldquo;Loco!&mdash;loco!&mdash;loco!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The next morning a strange procession filed through the streets to the
+collector&rsquo;s office. At its head was the admiral of the navy. Somewhere
+Felipe had raked together a pitiful semblance of a military uniform&mdash;a
+pair of red trousers, a dingy blue short jacket heavily ornamented with gold
+braid, and an old fatigue cap that must have been cast away by one of the
+British soldiers in Belize and brought away by Felipe on one of his coasting
+voyages. Buckled around his waist was an ancient ship&rsquo;s cutlass
+contributed to his equipment by Pedro Lafitte, the baker, who proudly asserted
+its inheritance from his ancestor, the illustrious buccaneer. At the
+admiral&rsquo;s heels tagged his newly-shipped crew&mdash;three grinning,
+glossy, black Caribs, bare to the waist, the sand spurting in showers from the
+spring of their naked feet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Briefly and with dignity Felipe demanded his vessel of the collector. And now a
+fresh honour awaited him. The collector&rsquo;s wife, who played the guitar and
+read novels in the hammock all day, had more than a little romance in her
+placid, yellow bosom. She had found in an old book an engraving of a flag that
+purported to be the naval flag of Anchuria. Perhaps it had so been designed by
+the founders of the nation; but, as no navy had ever been established, oblivion
+had claimed the flag. Laboriously with her own hands she had made a flag after
+the pattern&mdash;a red cross upon a blue-and-white ground. She presented it to
+Felipe with these words: &ldquo;Brave sailor, this flag is of your country. Be
+true, and defend it with your life. Go you with God.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For the first time since his appointment the admiral showed a flicker of
+emotion. He took the silken emblem, and passed his hand reverently over its
+surface. &ldquo;I am the admiral,&rdquo; he said to the collector&rsquo;s lady.
+Being on land he could bring himself to no more exuberant expression of
+sentiment. At sea with the flag at the masthead of his navy, some more eloquent
+exposition of feelings might be forthcoming.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Abruptly the admiral departed with his crew. For the next three days they were
+busy giving the <i>Estrella del Noche</i> a new coat of white paint trimmed
+with blue. And then Felipe further adorned himself by fastening a handful of
+brilliant parrot&rsquo;s plumes in his cap. Again he tramped with his faithful
+crew to the collector&rsquo;s office and formally notified him that the
+sloop&rsquo;s name had been changed to <i>El Nacional</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+During the next few months the navy had its troubles. Even an admiral is
+perplexed to know what to do without any orders. But none came. Neither did any
+salaries. <i>El Nacional</i> swung idly at anchor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When Felipe&rsquo;s little store of money was exhausted he went to the
+collector and raised the question of finances.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Salaries!&rdquo; exclaimed the collector, with hands raised;
+&ldquo;<i>Valgame Dios!</i> not one <i>centavo</i> of my own pay have I
+received for the last seven months. The pay of an admiral, do you ask? <i>Quién
+sabe?</i> Should it be less than three thousand <i>pesos</i>? <i>Mira!</i> you
+will see a revolution in this country very soon. A good sign of it is when the
+government calls all the time for <i>pesos</i>, <i>pesos</i>, <i>pesos</i>, and
+pays none out.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Felipe left the collector&rsquo;s office with a look almost of content on his
+sombre face. A revolution would mean fighting, and then the government would
+need his services. It was rather humiliating to be an admiral without anything
+to do, and have a hungry crew at your heels begging for <i>reales</i> to buy
+plantains and tobacco with.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When he returned to where his happy-go-lucky Caribs were waiting they sprang up
+and saluted, as he had drilled them to do.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Come, <i>muchachos</i>,&rdquo; said the admiral; &ldquo;it seems that
+the government is poor. It has no money to give us. We will earn what we need
+to live upon. Thus will we serve our country. Soon&rdquo;&mdash;his heavy eyes
+almost lighted up&mdash;&ldquo;it may gladly call upon us for help.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Thereafter <i>El Nacional</i> turned out with the other coast craft and became
+a wage-earner. She worked with the lighters freighting bananas and oranges out
+to the fruit steamers that could not approach nearer than a mile from the
+shore. Surely a self-supporting navy deserves red letters in the budget of any
+nation.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After earning enough at freighting to keep himself and his crew in provisions
+for a week Felipe would anchor the navy and hang about the little telegraph
+office, looking like one of the chorus of an insolvent comic opera troupe
+besieging the manager&rsquo;s den. A hope for orders from the capital was
+always in his heart. That his services as admiral had never been called into
+requirement hurt his pride and patriotism. At every call he would inquire,
+gravely and expectantly, for despatches. The operator would pretend to make a
+search, and then reply:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not yet, it seems, <i>Señor el Almirante&mdash;poco tiempo!</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Outside in the shade of the lime-trees the crew chewed sugar cane or slumbered,
+well content to serve a country that was contented with so little service.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One day in the early summer the revolution predicted by the collector flamed
+out suddenly. It had long been smouldering. At the first note of alarm the
+admiral of the navy force and fleet made all sail for a larger port on the
+coast of a neighbouring republic, where he traded a hastily collected cargo of
+fruit for its value in cartridges for the five Martini rifles, the only guns
+that the navy could boast. Then to the telegraph office sped the admiral.
+Sprawling in his favourite corner, in his fast-decaying uniform, with his
+prodigious sabre distributed between his red legs, he waited for the
+long-delayed, but now soon expected, orders.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not yet, <i>Señor el Almirante</i>,&rdquo; the telegraph clerk would
+call to him&mdash;&ldquo;<i>poco tiempo!</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At the answer the admiral would plump himself down with a great rattling of
+scabbard to await the infrequent tick of the little instrument on the table.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They will come,&rdquo; would be his unshaken reply; &ldquo;I am the
+admiral.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap09"></a>IX<br/>
+THE FLAG PARAMOUNT</h2>
+
+<p>
+At the head of the insurgent party appeared that Hector and learned Theban of
+the southern republics, Don Sabas Placido. A traveller, a soldier, a poet, a
+scientist, a statesman and a connoisseur&mdash;the wonder was that he could
+content himself with the petty, remote life of his native country.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It is a whim of Placido&rsquo;s,&rdquo; said a friend who knew him well,
+&ldquo;to take up political intrigue. It is not otherwise than as if he had
+come upon a new <i>tempo</i> in music, a new bacillus in the air, a new scent,
+or rhyme, or explosive. He will squeeze this revolution dry of sensations, and
+a week afterward will forget it, skimming the seas of the world in his
+brigantine to add to his already world-famous collections. Collections of what?
+<i>Por Dios!</i> of everything from postage stamps to prehistoric stone
+idols.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But, for a mere dilettante, the æsthetic Placido seemed to be creating a lively
+row. The people admired him; they were fascinated by his brilliancy and
+flattered by his taking an interest in so small a thing as his native country.
+They rallied to the call of his lieutenants in the capital, where (somewhat
+contrary to arrangements) the army remained faithful to the government. There
+was also lively skirmishing in the coast towns. It was rumoured that the
+revolution was aided by the Vesuvius Fruit Company, the power that forever
+stood with chiding smile and uplifted finger to keep Anchuria in the class of
+good children. Two of its steamers, the <i>Traveler</i> and the
+<i>Salvador</i>, were known to have conveyed insurgent troops from point to
+point along the coast.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As yet there had been no actual uprising in Coralio. Military law prevailed,
+and the ferment was bottled for the time. And then came the word that
+everywhere the revolutionists were encountering defeat. In the capital the
+president&rsquo;s forces triumphed; and there was a rumour that the leaders of
+the revolt had been forced to fly, hotly pursued.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the little telegraph office at Coralio there was always a gathering of
+officials and loyal citizens, awaiting news from the seat of government. One
+morning the telegraph key began clicking, and presently the operator called,
+loudly: &ldquo;One telegram for <i>el Almirante</i>, Don Señor Felipe
+Carrera!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was a shuffling sound, a great rattling of tin scabbard, and the admiral,
+prompt at his spot of waiting, leaped across the room to receive it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The message was handed to him. Slowly spelling it out, he found it to be his
+first official order&mdash;thus running:
+</p>
+
+<p class="letter">
+Proceed immediately with your vessel to mouth of Rio Ruiz; transport beef and
+provisions to barracks at Alforan.
+</p>
+
+<p class="right">
+Martinez, General.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Small glory, to be sure, in this, his country&rsquo;s first call. But it had
+called, and joy surged in the admiral&rsquo;s breast. He drew his cutlass belt
+to another buckle hole, roused his dozing crew, and in a quarter of an hour
+<i>El Nacional</i> was tacking swiftly down coast in a stiff landward breeze.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Rio Ruiz is a small river, emptying into the sea ten miles below Coralio.
+That portion of the coast is wild and solitary. Through a gorge in the
+Cordilleras rushes the Rio Ruiz, cold and bubbling, to glide, at last, with
+breadth and leisure, through an alluvial morass into the sea.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In two hours <i>El Nacional</i> entered the river&rsquo;s mouth. The banks were
+crowded with a disposition of formidable trees. The sumptuous undergrowth of
+the tropics overflowed the land, and drowned itself in the fallow waters.
+Silently the sloop entered there, and met a deeper silence. Brilliant with
+greens and ochres and floral scarlets, the umbrageous mouth of the Rio Ruiz
+furnished no sound or movement save of the sea-going water as it purled against
+the prow of the vessel. Small chance there seemed of wresting beef or
+provisions from that empty solitude.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The admiral decided to cast anchor, and, at the chain&rsquo;s rattle, the
+forest was stimulated to instant and resounding uproar. The mouth of the Rio
+Ruiz had only been taking a morning nap. Parrots and baboons screeched and
+barked in the trees; a whirring and a hissing and a booming marked the
+awakening of animal life; a dark blue bulk was visible for an instant, as a
+startled tapir fought his way through the vines.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The navy, under orders, hung in the mouth of the little river for hours. The
+crew served the dinner of shark&rsquo;s fin soup, plantains, crab gumbo and
+sour wine. The admiral, with a three-foot telescope, closely scanned the
+impervious foliage fifty yards away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was nearly sunset when a reverberating &ldquo;hal-lo-o-o!&rdquo; came from
+the forest to their left. It was answered; and three men, mounted upon mules,
+crashed through the tropic tangle to within a dozen yards of the river&rsquo;s
+bank. There they dismounted; and one, unbuckling his belt, struck each mule a
+violent blow with his sword scabbard, so that they, with a fling of heels,
+dashed back again into the forest.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Those were strange-looking men to be conveying beef and provisions. One was a
+large and exceedingly active man, of striking presence. He was of the purest
+Spanish type, with curling, gray-besprinkled, dark hair, blue, sparkling eyes,
+and the pronounced air of a <i>caballero grande</i>. The other two were small,
+brown-faced men, wearing white military uniforms, high riding boots and swords.
+The clothes of all were drenched, bespattered and rent by the thicket. Some
+stress of circumstance must have driven them, <i>diable à quatre</i>, through
+flood, mire and jungle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>O-hé! Señor Almirante</i>,&rdquo; called the large man. &ldquo;Send
+to us your boat.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The dory was lowered, and Felipe, with one of the Caribs, rowed toward the left
+bank.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The large man stood near the water&rsquo;s brink, waist deep in the curling
+vines. As he gazed upon the scarecrow figure in the stern of the dory a
+sprightly interest beamed upon his mobile face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Months of wageless and thankless service had dimmed the admiral&rsquo;s
+splendour. His red trousers were patched and ragged. Most of the bright buttons
+and yellow braid were gone from his jacket. The visor of his cap was torn, and
+depended almost to his eyes. The admiral&rsquo;s feet were bare.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Dear admiral,&rdquo; cried the large man, and his voice was like a blast
+from a horn, &ldquo;I kiss your hands. I knew we could build upon your
+fidelity. You had our despatch&mdash;from General Martinez. A little nearer
+with your boat, dear Admiral. Upon these devils of shifting vines we stand with
+the smallest security.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Felipe regarded him with a stolid face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Provisions and beef for the barracks at Alforan,&rdquo; he quoted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;No fault of the butchers, <i>Almirante mio</i>, that the beef awaits you
+not. But you are come in time to save the cattle. Get us aboard your vessel,
+señor, at once. You first, <i>caballeros&mdash;á priesa!</i> Come back for me.
+The boat is too small.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The dory conveyed the two officers to the sloop, and returned for the large
+man.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Have you so gross a thing as food, good admiral?&rdquo; he cried, when
+aboard. &ldquo;And, perhaps, coffee? Beef and provisions! <i>Nombre de
+Dios!</i> a little longer and we could have eaten one of those mules that you,
+Colonel Rafael, saluted so feelingly with your sword scabbard at parting. Let
+us have food; and then we will sail&mdash;for the barracks at
+Alforan&mdash;no?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Caribs prepared a meal, to which the three passengers of <i>El Nacional</i>
+set themselves with famished delight. About sunset, as was its custom, the
+breeze veered and swept back from the mountains, cool and steady, bringing a
+taste of the stagnant lagoons and mangrove swamps that guttered the lowlands.
+The mainsail of the sloop was hoisted and swelled to it, and at that moment
+they heard shouts and a waxing clamour from the bosky profundities of the
+shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The butchers, my dear admiral,&rdquo; said the large man, smiling,
+&ldquo;too late for the slaughter.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Further than his orders to his crew, the admiral was saying nothing. The
+topsail and jib were spread, and the sloop glided out of the estuary. The large
+man and his companions had bestowed themselves with what comfort they could
+about the bare deck. Belike, the thing big in their minds had been their
+departure from that critical shore; and now that the hazard was so far reduced
+their thoughts were loosed to the consideration of further deliverance. But
+when they saw the sloop turn and fly up coast again they relaxed, satisfied
+with the course the admiral had taken.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The large man sat at ease, his spirited blue eye engaged in the contemplation
+of the navy&rsquo;s commander. He was trying to estimate this sombre and
+fantastic lad, whose impenetrable stolidity puzzled him. Himself a fugitive,
+his life sought, and chafing under the smart of defeat and failure, it was
+characteristic of him to transfer instantly his interest to the study of a
+thing new to him. It was like him, too, to have conceived and risked all upon
+this last desperate and madcap scheme&mdash;this message to a poor, crazed
+<i>fanatico</i> cruising about with his grotesque uniform and his farcical
+title. But his companions had been at their wits&rsquo; end; escape had seemed
+incredible; and now he was pleased with the success of the plan they had called
+crack-brained and precarious.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The brief, tropic twilight seemed to slide swiftly into the pearly splendour of
+a moonlit night. And now the lights of Coralio appeared, distributed against
+the darkening shore to their right. The admiral stood, silent, at the tiller;
+the Caribs, like black panthers, held the sheets, leaping noiselessly at his
+short commands. The three passengers were watching intently the sea before
+them, and when at length they came in sight of the bulk of a steamer lying a
+mile out from the town, with her lights radiating deep into the water, they
+held a sudden voluble and close-headed converse. The sloop was speeding as if
+to strike midway between ship and shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The large man suddenly separated from his companions and approached the
+scarecrow at the helm.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;My dear admiral,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;the government has been
+exceedingly remiss. I feel all the shame for it that only its ignorance of your
+devoted service has prevented it from sustaining. An inexcusable oversight has
+been made. A vessel, a uniform and a crew worthy of your fidelity shall be
+furnished you. But just now, dear admiral, there is business of moment afoot.
+The steamer lying there is the <i>Salvador</i>. I and my friends desire to be
+conveyed to her, where we are sent on the government&rsquo;s business. Do us
+the favour to shape your course accordingly.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Without replying, the admiral gave a sharp command, and put the tiller hard to
+port. <i>El Nacional</i> swerved, and headed straight as an arrow&rsquo;s
+course for the shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Do me the favour,&rdquo; said the large man, a trifle restively,
+&ldquo;to acknowledge, at least, that you catch the sound of my words.&rdquo;
+It was possible that the fellow might be lacking in senses as well as
+intellect.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The admiral emitted a croaking, harsh laugh, and spake.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They will stand you,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;with your face to a wall and
+shoot you dead. That is the way they kill traitors. I knew you when you stepped
+into my boat. I have seen your picture in a book. You are Sabas Placido,
+traitor to your country. With your face to a wall. So, you will die. I am the
+admiral, and I will take you to them. With your face to a wall. Yes.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Don Sabas half turned and waved his hand, with a ringing laugh, toward his
+fellow fugitives. &ldquo;To you, <i>caballeros</i>, I have related the history
+of that session when we issued that O! so ridiculous commission. Of a truth our
+jest has been turned against us. Behold the Frankenstein&rsquo;s monster we
+have created!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Don Sabas glanced toward the shore. The lights of Coralio were drawing near. He
+could see the beach, the warehouse of the <i>Bodega Nacional</i>, the long, low
+<i>cuartel</i> occupied by the soldiers, and, behind that, gleaming in the
+moonlight, a stretch of high adobe wall. He had seen men stood with their faces
+to that wall and shot dead.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Again he addressed the extravagant figure at the helm.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It is true,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;that I am fleeing the country. But,
+receive the assurance that I care very little for that. Courts and camps
+everywhere are open to Sabas Placido. <i>Vaya!</i> what is this molehill of a
+republic&mdash;this pig&rsquo;s head of a country&mdash;to a man like me? I am
+a <i>paisano</i> of everywhere. In Rome, in London, in Paris, in Vienna, you
+will hear them say: &lsquo;Welcome back, Don Sabas.&rsquo;
+Come!&mdash;<i>tonto</i>&mdash;baboon of a boy&mdash;admiral, whatever you call
+yourself, turn your boat. Put us on board the <i>Salvador</i>, and here is your
+pay&mdash;five hundred <i>pesos</i> in money of the <i>Estados
+Unidos</i>&mdash;more than your lying government will pay you in twenty
+years.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Don Sabas pressed a plump purse against the youth&rsquo;s hand. The admiral
+gave no heed to the words or the movement. Braced against the helm, he was
+holding the sloop dead on her shoreward course. His dull face was lit almost to
+intelligence by some inward conceit that seemed to afford him joy, and found
+utterance in another parrot-like cackle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That is why they do it,&rdquo; he said&mdash;&ldquo;so that you will not
+see the guns. They fire&mdash;oom!&mdash;and you fall dead. With your face to
+the wall. Yes.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The admiral called a sudden order to his crew. The lithe, silent Caribs made
+fast the sheets they held, and slipped down the hatchway into the hold of the
+sloop. When the last one had disappeared, Don Sabas, like a big, brown leopard,
+leaped forward, closed and fastened the hatch and stood, smiling.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;No rifles, if you please, dear admiral,&rdquo; he said. &ldquo;It was a
+whimsey of mine once to compile a dictionary of the Carib <i>lengua</i>. So, I
+understood your order. Perhaps now you will&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He cut short his words, for he heard the dull &ldquo;swish&rdquo; of iron
+scraping along tin. The admiral had drawn the cutlass of Pedro Lafitte, and was
+darting upon him. The blade descended, and it was only by a display of
+surprising agility that the large man escaped, with only a bruised shoulder,
+the glancing weapon. He was drawing his pistol as he sprang, and the next
+instant he shot the admiral down.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Don Sabas stooped over him, and rose again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;In the heart,&rdquo; he said briefly. &ldquo;<i>Señores</i>, the navy is
+abolished.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Colonel Rafael sprang to the helm, and the other officer hastened to loose the
+mainsail sheets. The boom swung round; <i>El Nacional</i> veered and began to
+tack industriously for the <i>Salvador</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Strike that flag, señor,&rdquo; called Colonel Rafael. &ldquo;Our
+friends on the steamer will wonder why we are sailing under it.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well said,&rdquo; cried Don Sabas. Advancing to the mast he lowered the
+flag to the deck, where lay its too loyal supporter. Thus ended the Minister of
+War&rsquo;s little piece of after-dinner drollery, and by the same hand that
+began it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Suddenly Don Sabas gave a great cry of joy, and ran down the slanting deck to
+the side of Colonel Rafael. Across his arm he carried the flag of the
+extinguished navy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Mire! mire! señor.</i> Ah, <i>Dios!</i> Already can I hear that great
+bear of an <i>Oestreicher</i> shout, <i>&lsquo;Du hast mein herz
+gebrochen!&rsquo; Mire!</i> Of my friend, Herr Grunitz, of Vienna, you have
+heard me relate. That man has travelled to Ceylon for an orchid&mdash;to
+Patagonia for a headdress&mdash;to Benares for a slipper&mdash;to Mozambique
+for a spearhead to add to his famous collections. Thou knowest, also,
+<i>amigo</i> Rafael, that I have been a gatherer of curios. My collection of
+battle flags of the world&rsquo;s navies was the most complete in existence
+until last year. Then Herr Grunitz secured two, O! such rare specimens. One of
+a Barbary state, and one of the Makarooroos, a tribe on the west coast of
+Africa. I have not those, but they can be procured. But this flag,
+señor&mdash;do you know what it is? Name of God! do you know? See that red
+cross upon the blue and white ground! You never saw it before? <i>Seguramente
+no.</i> It is the naval flag of your country. <i>Mire!</i> This rotten tub we
+stand upon is its navy&mdash;that dead cockatoo lying there was its
+commander&mdash;that stroke of cutlass and single pistol shot a sea battle. All
+a piece of absurd foolery, I grant you&mdash;but authentic. There has never
+been another flag like this, and there never will be another. No. It is unique
+in the whole world. Yes. Think of what that means to a collector of flags! Do
+you know, <i>Coronel mio</i>, how many golden crowns Herr Grunitz would give
+for this flag? Ten thousand, likely. Well, a hundred thousand would not buy it.
+Beautiful flag! Only flag! Little devil of a most heaven-born flag!
+<i>O-hé!</i> old grumbler beyond the ocean. Wait till Don Sabas comes again to
+the Königin Strasse. He will let you kneel and touch the folds of it with one
+finger. <i>O-hé!</i> old spectacled ransacker of the world!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Forgotten was the impotent revolution, the danger, the loss, the gall of
+defeat. Possessed solely by the inordinate and unparalleled passion of the
+collector, he strode up and down the little deck, clasping to his breast with
+one hand the paragon of a flag. He snapped his fingers triumphantly toward the
+east. He shouted the paean to his prize in trumpet tones, as though he would
+make old Grunitz hear in his musty den beyond the sea.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They were waiting, on the <i>Salvador</i>, to welcome them. The sloop came
+close alongside the steamer where her sides were sliced almost to the lower
+deck for the loading of fruit. The sailors of the <i>Salvador</i> grappled and
+held her there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Captain McLeod leaned over the side.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well, señor, the jig is up, I&rsquo;m told.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The jig is up?&rdquo; Don Sabas looked perplexed for a moment.
+&ldquo;That revolution&mdash;ah, yes!&rdquo; With a shrug of his shoulders he
+dismissed the matter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The captain learned of the escape and the imprisoned crew.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Caribs?&rdquo; he said; &ldquo;no harm in them.&rdquo; He slipped down
+into the sloop and kicked loose the hasp of the hatch. The black fellows came
+tumbling up, sweating but grinning.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Hey! black boys!&rdquo; said the captain, in a dialect of his own;
+&ldquo;you sabe, catchy boat and vamos back same place quick.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They saw him point to themselves, the sloop and Coralio. &ldquo;Yas,
+yas!&rdquo; they cried, with broader grins and many nods.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The four&mdash;Don Sabas, the two officers and the captain&mdash;moved to quit
+the sloop. Don Sabas lagged a little behind, looking at the still form of the
+late admiral, sprawled in his paltry trappings.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Pobrecito loco</i>,&rdquo; he said softly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was a brilliant cosmopolite and a <i>cognoscente</i> of high rank; but,
+after all, he was of the same race and blood and instinct as this people. Even
+as the simple <i>paisanos</i> of Coralio had said it, so said Don Sabas.
+Without a smile, he looked, and said, &ldquo;The poor little crazed one!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Stooping he raised the limp shoulders, drew the priceless and induplicable flag
+under them and over the breast, pinning it there with the diamond star of the
+Order of San Carlos that he took from the collar of his own coat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He followed after the others, and stood with them upon the deck of the
+<i>Salvador</i>. The sailors that steadied <i>El Nacional</i> shoved her off.
+The jabbering Caribs hauled away at the rigging; the sloop headed for the
+shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And Herr Grunitz&rsquo;s collection of naval flags was still the finest in the
+world.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap10"></a>X<br/>
+THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM</h2>
+
+<p>
+One night when there was no breeze, and Coralio seemed closer than ever to the
+gratings of Avernus, five men were grouped about the door of the photograph
+establishment of Keogh and Clancy. Thus, in all the scorched and exotic places
+of the earth, Caucasians meet when the day&rsquo;s work is done to preserve the
+fulness of their heritage by the aspersion of alien things.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Johnny Atwood lay stretched upon the grass in the undress uniform of a Carib,
+and prated feebly of cool water to be had in the cucumber-wood pumps of
+Dalesburg. Dr. Gregg, through the prestige of his whiskers and as a bribe
+against the relation of his imminent professional tales, was conceded the
+hammock that was swung between the door jamb and a calabash-tree. Keogh had
+moved out upon the grass a little table that held the instrument for burnishing
+completed photographs. He was the only busy one of the group. Industriously
+from between the cylinders of the burnisher rolled the finished depictments of
+Coralio&rsquo;s citizens. Blanchard, the French mining engineer, in his cool
+linen viewed the smoke of his cigarette through his calm glasses, impervious to
+the heat. Clancy sat on the steps, smoking his short pipe. His mood was the
+gossip&rsquo;s; the others were reduced, by the humidity, to the state of
+disability desirable in an audience.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Clancy was an American with an Irish diathesis and cosmopolitan proclivities.
+Many businesses had claimed him, but not for long. The roadster&rsquo;s blood
+was in his veins. The voice of the tintype was but one of the many callings
+that had wooed him upon so many roads. Sometimes he could be persuaded to oral
+construction of his voyages into the informal and egregious. To-night there
+were symptoms of divulgement in him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Tis elegant weather for filibusterin&rsquo;,&rdquo; he
+volunteered. &ldquo;It reminds me of the time I struggled to liberate a nation
+from the poisonous breath of a tyrant&rsquo;s clutch. &rsquo;Twas hard work.
+&rsquo;Tis strainin&rsquo; to the back and makes corns on the hands.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I didn&rsquo;t know you had ever lent your sword to an oppressed
+people,&rdquo; murmured Atwood, from the grass.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I did,&rdquo; said Clancy; &ldquo;and they turned it into a
+ploughshare.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What country was so fortunate as to secure your aid?&rdquo; airily
+inquired Blanchard.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Kamchatka?&rdquo; asked Clancy, with seeming irrelevance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Why, off Siberia somewhere in the Arctic regions,&rdquo; somebody
+answered, doubtfully.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I thought that was the cold one,&rdquo; said Clancy, with a satisfied
+nod. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m always gettin&rsquo; the two names mixed. &rsquo;Twas
+Guatemala, then&mdash;the hot one&mdash;I&rsquo;ve been filibusterin&rsquo;
+with. Ye&rsquo;ll find that country on the map. &rsquo;Tis in the district
+known as the tropics. By the foresight of Providence, it lies on the coast so
+the geography man could run the names of the towns off into the water.
+They&rsquo;re an inch long, small type, composed of Spanish dialects, and,
+&rsquo;tis my opinion, of the same system of syntax that blew up the
+<i>Maine</i>. Yes, &rsquo;twas that country I sailed against, single-handed,
+and endeavoured to liberate it from a tyrannical government with a
+single-barreled pickaxe, unloaded at that. Ye don&rsquo;t understand, of
+course. &rsquo;Tis a statement demandin&rsquo; elucidation and apologies.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twas in New Orleans one morning about the first of June; I was
+standin&rsquo; down on the wharf, lookin&rsquo; about at the ships in the
+river. There was a little steamer moored right opposite me that seemed about
+ready to sail. The funnels of it were throwin&rsquo; out smoke, and a gang of
+roustabouts were carryin&rsquo; aboard a pile of boxes that was stacked up on
+the wharf. The boxes were about two feet square, and somethin&rsquo; like four
+feet long, and they seemed to be pretty heavy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I walked over, careless, to the stack of boxes. I saw one of them had
+been broken in handlin&rsquo;. &rsquo;Twas curiosity made me pull up the loose
+top and look inside. The box was packed full of Winchester rifles. &lsquo;So,
+so,&rsquo; says I to myself; &lsquo;somebody&rsquo;s gettin&rsquo; a twist on
+the neutrality laws. Somebody&rsquo;s aidin&rsquo; with munitions of war. I
+wonder where the popguns are goin&rsquo;?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I heard somebody cough, and I turned around. There stood a little,
+round, fat man with a brown face and white clothes, a first-class-looking
+little man, with a four-karat diamond on his finger and his eye full of
+interrogations and respects. I judged he was a kind of foreigner&mdash;may be
+from Russia or Japan or the archipelagoes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Hist!&rsquo; says the round man, full of concealments and
+confidences. &lsquo;Will the señor respect the discoveryments he has made, that
+the mans on the ship shall not be acquaint? The señor will be a gentleman that
+shall not expose one thing that by accident occur.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Monseer,&rsquo; says I&mdash;for I judged him to be a kind of
+Frenchman&mdash;&lsquo;receive my most exasperated assurances that your secret
+is safe with James Clancy. Furthermore, I will go so far as to remark, Veev la
+Liberty&mdash;veev it good and strong. Whenever you hear of a Clancy
+obstructin&rsquo; the abolishment of existin&rsquo; governments you may notify
+me by return mail.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;The señor is good,&rsquo; says the dark, fat man, smilin&rsquo;
+under his black mustache. &lsquo;Wish you to come aboard my ship and drink of
+wine a glass.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Bein&rsquo; a Clancy, in two minutes me and the foreigner man were
+seated at a table in the cabin of the steamer, with a bottle between us. I
+could hear the heavy boxes bein&rsquo; dumped into the hold. I judged that
+cargo must consist of at least 2,000 Winchesters. Me and the brown man drank
+the bottle of stuff, and he called the steward to bring another. When you
+amalgamate a Clancy with the contents of a bottle you practically instigate
+secession. I had heard a good deal about these revolutions in them tropical
+localities, and I begun to want a hand in it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;You goin&rsquo; to stir things up in your country, ain&rsquo;t
+you, monseer?&rsquo; says I, with a wink to let him know I was on.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Yes, yes,&rsquo; said the little man, pounding his fist on the
+table. &lsquo;A change of the greatest will occur. Too long have the people
+been oppressed with the promises and the never-to-happen things to become. The
+great work it shall be carry on. Yes. Our forces shall in the capital city
+strike of the soonest. <i>Carrambos!</i>&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;<i>Carrambos</i> is the word,&rsquo; says I, beginning to invest
+myself with enthusiasm and more wine, &lsquo;likewise veeva, as I said before.
+May the shamrock of old&mdash;I mean the banana-vine or the pie-plant, or
+whatever the imperial emblem may be of your down-trodden country, wave
+forever.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;A thousand thank-yous,&rsquo; says the round man, &lsquo;for your
+emission of amicable utterances. What our cause needs of the very most is mans
+who will the work do, to lift it along. Oh, for one thousands strong, good mans
+to aid the General De Vega that he shall to his country bring those success and
+glory! It is hard&mdash;oh, so hard to find good mans to help in the
+work.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Monseer,&rsquo; says I, leanin&rsquo; over the table and
+graspin&rsquo; his hand, &lsquo;I don&rsquo;t know where your country is, but
+me heart bleeds for it. The heart of a Clancy was never deaf to the sight of an
+oppressed people. The family is filibusterers by birth, and foreigners by
+trade. If you can use James Clancy&rsquo;s arms and his blood in denudin&rsquo;
+your shores of the tyrant&rsquo;s yoke they&rsquo;re yours to command.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;General De Vega was overcome with joy to confiscate my condolence of his
+conspiracies and predicaments. He tried to embrace me across the table, but his
+fatness, and the wine that had been in the bottles, prevented. Thus was I
+welcomed into the ranks of filibustery. Then the general man told me his
+country had the name of Guatemala, and was the greatest nation laved by any
+ocean whatever anywhere. He looked at me with tears in his eyes, and from time
+to time he would emit the remark, &lsquo;Ah! big, strong, brave mans! That is
+what my country need.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;General De Vega, as was the name by which he denounced himself, brought
+out a document for me to sign, which I did, makin&rsquo; a fine flourish and
+curlycue with the tail of the &lsquo;y.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Your passage-money,&rsquo; says the general, business-like,
+&lsquo;shall from your pay be deduct.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twill not,&rsquo; says I, haughty. &lsquo;I&rsquo;ll pay my own
+passage.&rsquo; A hundred and eighty dollars I had in my inside pocket, and
+&rsquo;twas no common filibuster I was goin&rsquo; to be, filibusterin&rsquo;
+for me board and clothes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The steamer was to sail in two hours, and I went ashore to get some
+things together I&rsquo;d need. When I came aboard I showed the general with
+pride the outfit. &rsquo;Twas a fine Chinchilla overcoat, Arctic overshoes, fur
+cap and earmuffs, with elegant fleece-lined gloves and woolen muffler.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;<i>Carrambos!</i>&rsquo; says the little general. &lsquo;What
+clothes are these that shall go to the tropic?&rsquo; And then the little
+spalpeen laughs, and he calls the captain, and the captain calls the purser,
+and they pipe up the chief engineer, and the whole gang leans against the cabin
+and laughs at Clancy&rsquo;s wardrobe for Guatemala.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I reflects a bit, serious, and asks the general again to denominate the
+terms by which his country is called. He tells me, and I see then that
+&rsquo;twas the t&rsquo;other one, Kamchatka, I had in mind. Since then
+I&rsquo;ve had difficulty in separatin&rsquo; the two nations in name, climate
+and geographic disposition.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I paid my passage&mdash;twenty-four dollars, first cabin&mdash;and ate
+at table with the officer crowd. Down on the lower deck was a gang of
+second-class passengers, about forty of them, seemin&rsquo; to be Dagoes and
+the like. I wondered what so many of them were goin&rsquo; along for.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well, then, in three days we sailed alongside that Guatemala.
+&rsquo;Twas a blue country, and not yellow as &rsquo;tis miscolored on the map.
+We landed at a town on the coast, where a train of cars was waitin&rsquo; for
+us on a dinky little railroad. The boxes on the steamer were brought ashore and
+loaded on the cars. The gang of Dagoes got aboard, too, the general and me in
+the front car. Yes, me and General De Vega headed the revolution, as it pulled
+out of the seaport town. That train travelled about as fast as a policeman
+goin&rsquo; to a riot. It penetrated the most conspicuous lot of fuzzy scenery
+ever seen outside a geography. We run some forty miles in seven hours, and the
+train stopped. There was no more railroad. &rsquo;Twas a sort of camp in a damp
+gorge full of wildness and melancholies. They was gradin&rsquo; and
+choppin&rsquo; out the forests ahead to continue the road. &lsquo;Here,&rsquo;
+says I to myself, &lsquo;is the romantic haunt of the revolutionists. Here will
+Clancy, by the virtue that is in a superior race and the inculcation of Fenian
+tactics, strike a tremendous blow for liberty.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They unloaded the boxes from the train and begun to knock the tops off.
+From the first one that was open I saw General De Vega take the Winchester
+rifles and pass them around to a squad of morbid soldiery. The other boxes was
+opened next, and, believe me or not, divil another gun was to be seen. Every
+other box in the load was full of pickaxes and spades.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;And then&mdash;sorrow be upon them tropics&mdash;the proud Clancy and
+the dishonoured Dagoes, each one of them, had to shoulder a pick or a spade,
+and march away to work on that dirty little railroad. Yes; &rsquo;twas that the
+Dagoes shipped for, and &rsquo;twas that the filibusterin&rsquo; Clancy signed
+for, though unbeknownst to himself at the time. In after days I found out about
+it. It seems &rsquo;twas hard to get hands to work on that road. The
+intelligent natives of the country was too lazy to work. Indeed, the saints
+know, &rsquo;twas unnecessary. By stretchin&rsquo; out one hand, they could
+seize the most delicate and costly fruits of the earth, and, by
+stretchin&rsquo; out the other, they could sleep for days at a time without
+hearin&rsquo; a seven-o&rsquo;clock whistle or the footsteps of the rent man
+upon the stairs. So, regular, the steamers travelled to the United States to
+seduce labour. Usually the imported spade-slingers died in two or three months
+from eatin&rsquo; the over-ripe water and breathin&rsquo; the violent tropical
+scenery. Wherefore they made them sign contracts for a year, when they hired
+them, and put an armed guard over the poor divils to keep them from
+runnin&rsquo; away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twas thus I was double-crossed by the tropics through a family
+failin&rsquo; of goin&rsquo; out of the way to hunt disturbances.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They gave me a pick, and I took it, meditatin&rsquo; an insurrection on
+the spot; but there was the guards handlin&rsquo; the Winchesters careless, and
+I come to the conclusion that discretion was the best part of
+filibusterin&rsquo;. There was about a hundred of us in the gang startin&rsquo;
+out to work, and the word was given to move. I steps out of the ranks and goes
+up to that General De Vega man, who was smokin&rsquo; a cigar and gazin&rsquo;
+upon the scene with satisfactions and glory. He smiles at me polite and
+devilish. &lsquo;Plenty work,&rsquo; says he, &lsquo;for big, strong mans in
+Guatemala. Yes. T&rsquo;irty dollars in the month. Good pay. Ah, yes. You
+strong, brave man. Bimeby we push those railroad in the capital very quick.
+They want you go work now. <i>Adios</i>, strong mans.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Monseer,&rsquo; says I, lingerin&rsquo;, &lsquo;will you tell a
+poor little Irishman this: When I set foot on your cockroachy steamer, and
+breathed liberal and revolutionary sentiments into your sour wine, did you
+think I was conspirin&rsquo; to sling a pick on your contemptuous little
+railroad? And when you answered me with patriotic recitations, humping up the
+star-spangled cause of liberty, did you have meditations of reducin&rsquo; me
+to the ranks of the stump-grubbin&rsquo; Dagoes in the chain-gangs of your vile
+and grovelin&rsquo; country?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The general man expanded his rotundity and laughed considerable. Yes, he
+laughed very long and loud, and I, Clancy, stood and waited.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Comical mans!&rsquo; he shouts, at last. &lsquo;So you will kill
+me from the laughing. Yes; it is hard to find the brave, strong mans to aid my
+country. Revolutions? Did I speak of r-r-revolutions? Not one word. I say, big,
+strong mans is need in Guatemala. So. The mistake is of you. You have looked in
+those one box containing those gun for the guard. You think all boxes is
+contain gun? No.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;There is not war in Guatemala. But work? Yes. Good. T&rsquo;irty
+dollar in the month. You shall shoulder one pickaxe, señor, and dig for the
+liberty and prosperity of Guatemala. Off to your work. The guard waits for
+you.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Little, fat, poodle dog of a brown man,&rsquo; says I, quiet, but
+full of indignations and discomforts, &lsquo;things shall happen to you. Maybe
+not right away, but as soon as J. Clancy can formulate somethin&rsquo; in the
+way of repartee.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The boss of the gang orders us to work. I tramps off with the Dagoes,
+and I hears the distinguished patriot and kidnapper laughin&rsquo; hearty as we
+go.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Tis a sorrowful fact, for eight weeks I built railroads for that
+misbehavin&rsquo; country. I filibustered twelve hours a day with a heavy pick
+and a spade, choppin&rsquo; away the luxurious landscape that grew upon the
+right of way. We worked in swamps that smelled like there was a leak in the gas
+mains, trampin&rsquo; down a fine assortment of the most expensive hothouse
+plants and vegetables. The scene was tropical beyond the wildest imagination of
+the geography man. The trees was all sky-scrapers; the underbrush was full of
+needles and pins; there was monkeys jumpin&rsquo; around and crocodiles and
+pink-tailed mockin&rsquo;-birds, and ye stood knee-deep in the rotten water and
+grabbled roots for the liberation of Guatemala. Of nights we would build
+smudges in camp to discourage the mosquitoes, and sit in the smoke, with the
+guards pacin&rsquo; all around us. There was two hundred men workin&rsquo; on
+the road&mdash;mostly Dagoes, nigger-men, Spanish-men and Swedes. Three or four
+were Irish.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;One old man named Halloran&mdash;a man of Hibernian entitlements and
+discretions, explained it to me. He had been workin&rsquo; on the road a year.
+Most of them died in less than six months. He was dried up to gristle and bone,
+and shook with chills every third night.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;When you first come,&rsquo; says he, &lsquo;ye think ye&rsquo;ll
+leave right away. But they hold out your first month&rsquo;s pay for your
+passage over, and by that time the tropics has its grip on ye. Ye&rsquo;re
+surrounded by a ragin&rsquo; forest full of disreputable beasts&mdash;lions and
+baboons and anacondas&mdash;waitin&rsquo; to devour ye. The sun strikes ye
+hard, and melts the marrow in your bones. Ye get similar to the lettuce-eaters
+the poetry-book speaks about. Ye forget the elevated sintiments of life, such
+as patriotism, revenge, disturbances of the peace and the dacint love of a
+clane shirt. Ye do your work, and ye swallow the kerosene ile and rubber
+pipestems dished up to ye by the Dago cook for food. Ye light your pipeful, and
+say to yoursilf, &ldquo;Nixt week I&rsquo;ll break away,&rdquo; and ye go to
+sleep and call yersilf a liar, for ye know ye&rsquo;ll never do it.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Who is this general man,&rsquo; asks I, &lsquo;that calls himself
+De Vega?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;&rsquo;Tis the man,&rsquo; says Halloran, &lsquo;who is
+tryin&rsquo; to complete the finishin&rsquo; of the railroad. &rsquo;Twas the
+project of a private corporation, but it busted, and then the government took
+it up. De Vegy is a big politician, and wants to be prisident. The people want
+the railroad completed, as they&rsquo;re taxed mighty on account of it. The De
+Vegy man is pushin&rsquo; it along as a campaign move.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;&rsquo;Tis not my way,&rsquo; says I, &lsquo;to make threats
+against any man, but there&rsquo;s an account to be settled between the
+railroad man and James O&rsquo;Dowd Clancy.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;&rsquo;Twas that way I thought, mesilf, at first,&rsquo; Halloran
+says, with a big sigh, &lsquo;until I got to be a lettuce-eater. The
+fault&rsquo;s wid these tropics. They rejuices a man&rsquo;s system. &rsquo;Tis
+a land, as the poet says, &ldquo;Where it always seems to be after
+dinner.&rdquo; I does me work and smokes me pipe and sleeps. There&rsquo;s
+little else in life, anyway. Ye&rsquo;ll get that way yersilf, mighty soon.
+Don&rsquo;t be harbourin&rsquo; any sintiments at all, Clancy.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I can&rsquo;t help it,&rsquo; says I; &lsquo;I&rsquo;m full of
+&rsquo;em. I enlisted in the revolutionary army of this dark country in good
+faith to fight for its liberty, honours and silver candlesticks; instead of
+which I am set to amputatin&rsquo; its scenery and grubbin&rsquo; its roots.
+&rsquo;Tis the general man will have to pay for it.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Two months I worked on that railroad before I found a chance to get
+away. One day a gang of us was sent back to the end of the completed line to
+fetch some picks that had been sent down to Port Barrios to be sharpened. They
+were brought on a hand-car, and I noticed, when I started away, that the car
+was left there on the track.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That night, about twelve, I woke up Halloran and told him my scheme.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Run away?&rsquo; says Halloran. &lsquo;Good Lord, Clancy, do ye
+mean it? Why, I ain&rsquo;t got the nerve. It&rsquo;s too chilly, and I
+ain&rsquo;t slept enough. Run away? I told you, Clancy, I&rsquo;ve eat the
+lettuce. I&rsquo;ve lost my grip. &rsquo;Tis the tropics that&rsquo;s done it.
+&rsquo;Tis like the poet says: &ldquo;Forgotten are our friends that we have
+left behind; in the hollow lettuce-land we will live and lay reclined.&rdquo;
+You better go on, Clancy. I&rsquo;ll stay, I guess. It&rsquo;s too early and
+cold, and I&rsquo;m sleepy.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;So I had to leave Halloran. I dressed quiet, and slipped out of the tent
+we were in. When the guard came along I knocked him over, like a ninepin, with
+a green cocoanut I had, and made for the railroad. I got on that hand-car and
+made it fly. &rsquo;Twas yet a while before daybreak when I saw the lights of
+Port Barrios about a mile away. I stopped the hand-car there and walked to the
+town. I stepped inside the corporations of that town with care and hesitations.
+I was not afraid of the army of Guatemala, but me soul quaked at the prospect
+of a hand-to-hand struggle with its employment bureau. &rsquo;Tis a country
+that hires its help easy and keeps &rsquo;em long. Sure I can fancy Missis
+America and Missis Guatemala passin&rsquo; a bit of gossip some fine, still
+night across the mountains. &lsquo;Oh, dear,&rsquo; says Missis America,
+&lsquo;and it&rsquo;s a lot of trouble I&rsquo;m havin&rsquo; ag&rsquo;in with
+the help, señora, ma&rsquo;am.&rsquo; &lsquo;Laws, now!&rsquo; says Missis
+Guatemala, &lsquo;you don&rsquo;t say so, ma&rsquo;am! Now, mine never think of
+leavin&rsquo; me&mdash;te-he! ma&rsquo;am,&rsquo; snickers Missis Guatemala.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I was wonderin&rsquo; how I was goin&rsquo; to move away from them
+tropics without bein&rsquo; hired again. Dark as it was, I could see a steamer
+ridin&rsquo; in the harbour, with smoke emergin&rsquo; from her stacks. I
+turned down a little grass street that run down to the water. On the beach I
+found a little brown nigger-man just about to shove off in a skiff.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Hold on, Sambo,&rsquo; says I, &lsquo;savve English?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Heap plenty, yes,&rsquo; says he, with a pleasant grin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;What steamer is that?&rsquo; I asks him, &lsquo;and where is it
+going? And what&rsquo;s the news, and the good word and the time of day?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;That steamer the <i>Conchita</i>,&rsquo; said the brown man,
+affable and easy, rollin&rsquo; a cigarette. &lsquo;Him come from New Orleans
+for load banana. Him got load last night. I think him sail in one, two hour.
+Verree nice day we shall be goin&rsquo; have. You hear some talkee &rsquo;bout
+big battle, maybe so? You think catchee General De Vega, señor? Yes? No?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;How&rsquo;s that, Sambo?&rsquo; says I. &lsquo;Big battle? What
+battle? Who wants catchee General De Vega? I&rsquo;ve been up at my old gold
+mines in the interior for a couple of months, and haven&rsquo;t heard any
+news.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Oh,&rsquo; says the nigger-man, proud to speak the English,
+&lsquo;verree great revolution in Guatemala one week ago. General De Vega, him
+try be president. Him raise armee&mdash;one&mdash;five&mdash;ten thousand mans
+for fight at the government. Those one government send
+five&mdash;forty&mdash;hundred thousand soldier to suppress revolution. They
+fight big battle yesterday at Lomagrande&mdash;that about nineteen or fifty
+mile in the mountain. That government soldier wheep General De Vega&mdash;oh,
+most bad. Five hundred&mdash;nine hundred&mdash;two thousand of his mans is
+kill. That revolution is smash suppress&mdash;bust&mdash;very quick. General De
+Vega, him r-r-run away fast on one big mule. Yes, <i>carrambos!</i> The
+general, him r-r-run away, and his armee is kill. That government soldier, they
+try find General De Vega verree much. They want catchee him for shoot. You
+think they catchee that general, señor?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Saints grant it!&rsquo; says I. &lsquo;&rsquo;Twould be the
+judgment of Providence for settin&rsquo; the warlike talent of a Clancy to
+gradin&rsquo; the tropics with a pick and shovel. But &rsquo;tis not so much a
+question of insurrections now, me little man, as &rsquo;tis of the hired-man
+problem. &rsquo;Tis anxious I am to resign a situation of responsibility and
+trust with the white wings department of your great and degraded country. Row
+me in your little boat out to that steamer, and I&rsquo;ll give ye five
+dollars&mdash;sinker pacers&mdash;sinker pacers,&rsquo; says I, reducin&rsquo;
+the offer to the language and denomination of the tropic dialects.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;<i>Cinco pesos</i>,&rsquo; repeats the little man. &lsquo;Five
+dollee, you give?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twas not such a bad little man. He had hesitations at first,
+sayin&rsquo; that passengers leavin&rsquo; the country had to have papers and
+passports, but at last he took me out alongside the steamer.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Day was just breakin&rsquo; as we struck her, and there wasn&rsquo;t a
+soul to be seen on board. The water was very still, and the nigger-man gave me
+a lift from the boat, and I climbed onto the steamer where her side was sliced
+to the deck for loadin&rsquo; fruit. The hatches was open, and I looked down
+and saw the cargo of bananas that filled the hold to within six feet of the
+top. I thinks to myself, &lsquo;Clancy, you better go as a stowaway. It&rsquo;s
+safer. The steamer men might hand you back to the employment bureau. The
+tropic&rsquo;ll get you, Clancy, if you don&rsquo;t watch out.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;So I jumps down easy among the bananas, and digs out a hole to hide in
+among the bunches. In an hour or so I could hear the engines goin&rsquo;, and
+feel the steamer rockin&rsquo;, and I knew we were off to sea. They left the
+hatches open for ventilation, and pretty soon it was light enough in the hold
+to see fairly well. I got to feelin&rsquo; a bit hungry, and thought I&rsquo;d
+have a light fruit lunch, by way of refreshment. I creeped out of the hole
+I&rsquo;d made and stood up straight. Just then I saw another man crawl up
+about ten feet away and reach out and skin a banana and stuff it into his
+mouth. &rsquo;Twas a dirty man, black-faced and ragged and disgraceful of
+aspect. Yes, the man was a ringer for the pictures of the fat Weary Willie in
+the funny papers. I looked again, and saw it was my general man&mdash;De Vega,
+the great revolutionist, mule-rider and pickaxe importer. When he saw me the
+general hesitated with his mouth filled with banana and his eyes the size of
+cocoanuts.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Hist!&rsquo; I says. &lsquo;Not a word, or they&rsquo;ll put us
+off and make us walk. &ldquo;Veev la Liberty!&rdquo;&rsquo; I adds,
+copperin&rsquo; the sentiment by shovin&rsquo; a banana into the source of it.
+I was certain the general wouldn&rsquo;t recognize me. The nefarious work of
+the tropics had left me lookin&rsquo; different. There was half an inch of roan
+whiskers coverin&rsquo; me face, and me costume was a pair of blue overalls and
+a red shirt.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;How you come in the ship, señor?&rsquo; asked the general as soon
+as he could speak.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;By the back door&mdash;whist!&rsquo; says I. &lsquo;&rsquo;Twas a
+glorious blow for liberty we struck,&rsquo; I continues; &lsquo;but we was
+overpowered by numbers. Let us accept our defeat like brave men and eat another
+banana.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Were you in the cause of liberty fightin&rsquo;, señor?&rsquo;
+says the general, sheddin&rsquo; tears on the cargo.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;To the last,&rsquo; says I. &lsquo;&rsquo;Twas I led the last
+desperate charge against the minions of the tyrant. But it made them mad, and
+we was forced to retreat. &rsquo;Twas I, general, procured the mule upon which
+you escaped. Could you give that ripe bunch a little boost this way, general?
+It&rsquo;s a bit out of my reach. Thanks.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Say you so, brave patriot?&rsquo; said the general, again
+weepin&rsquo;. &lsquo;Ah, <i>Dios!</i> And I have not the means to reward your
+devotion. Barely did I my life bring away. <i>Carrambos!</i> what a
+devil&rsquo;s animal was that mule, señor! Like ships in one storm was I dashed
+about. The skin on myself was ripped away with the thorns and vines. Upon the
+bark of a hundred trees did that beast of the infernal bump, and cause outrage
+to the legs of mine. In the night to Port Barrios I came. I dispossess myself
+of that mountain of mule and hasten along the water shore. I find a little boat
+to be tied. I launch myself and row to the steamer. I cannot see any mans on
+board, so I climbed one rope which hang at the side. I then myself hide in the
+bananas. Surely, I say, if the ship captains view me, they shall throw me again
+to those Guatemala. Those things are not good. Guatemala will shoot General De
+Vega. Therefore, I am hide and remain silent. Life itself is glorious. Liberty,
+it is pretty good; but so good as life I do not think.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Three days, as I said, was the trip to New Orleans. The general man and
+me got to be cronies of the deepest dye. Bananas we ate until they were
+distasteful to the sight and an eyesore to the palate, but to bananas alone was
+the bill of fare reduced. At night I crawls out, careful, on the lower deck,
+and gets a bucket of fresh water.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That General De Vega was a man inhabited by an engorgement of words and
+sentences. He added to the monotony of the voyage by divestin&rsquo; himself of
+conversation. He believed I was a revolutionist of his own party, there
+bein&rsquo;, as he told me, a good many Americans and other foreigners in its
+ranks. &rsquo;Twas a braggart and a conceited little gabbler it was, though he
+considered himself a hero. &rsquo;Twas on himself he wasted all his regrets at
+the failin&rsquo; of his plot. Not a word did the little balloon have to say
+about the other misbehavin&rsquo; idiots that had been shot, or run themselves
+to death in his revolution.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The second day out he was feelin&rsquo; pretty braggy and uppish for a
+stowed-away conspirator that owed his existence to a mule and stolen bananas.
+He was tellin&rsquo; me about the great railroad he had been buildin&rsquo;,
+and he relates what he calls a comic incident about a fool Irishman he
+inveigled from New Orleans to sling a pick on his little morgue of a
+narrow-gauge line. &rsquo;Twas sorrowful to hear the little, dirty general tell
+the opprobrious story of how he put salt upon the tail of that reckless and
+silly bird, Clancy. Laugh, he did, hearty and long. He shook with
+laughin&rsquo;, the black-faced rebel and outcast, standin&rsquo; neck-deep in
+bananas, without friends or country.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Ah, señor,&rsquo; he snickers, &lsquo;to the death you would have
+laughed at that drollest Irish. I say to him: &ldquo;Strong, big mans is need
+very much in Guatemala.&rdquo; &ldquo;I will blows strike for your down-pressed
+country,&rdquo; he say. &ldquo;That shall you do,&rdquo; I tell him. Ah! it was
+an Irish so comic. He sees one box break upon the wharf that contain for the
+guard a few gun. He think there is gun in all the box. But that is all pickaxe.
+Yes. Ah! señor, could you the face of that Irish have seen when they set him to
+the work!&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twas thus the ex-boss of the employment bureau contributed to the
+tedium of the trip with merry jests and anecdote. But now and then he would
+weep upon the bananas and make oration about the lost cause of liberty and the
+mule.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twas a pleasant sound when the steamer bumped against the pier in
+New Orleans. Pretty soon we heard the pat-a-pat of hundreds of bare feet, and
+the Dago gang that unloads the fruit jumped on the deck and down into the hold.
+Me and the general worked a while at passin&rsquo; up the bunches, and they
+thought we were part of the gang. After about an hour we managed to slip off
+the steamer onto the wharf.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Twas a great honour on the hands of an obscure Clancy,
+havin&rsquo; the entertainment of the representative of a great foreign
+filibusterin&rsquo; power. I first bought for the general and myself many long
+drinks and things to eat that were not bananas. The general man trotted along
+at my side, leavin&rsquo; all the arrangements to me. I led him up to Lafayette
+Square and set him on a bench in the little park. Cigarettes I had bought for
+him, and he humped himself down on the seat like a little, fat, contented hobo.
+I look him over as he sets there, and what I see pleases me. Brown by nature
+and instinct, he is now brindled with dirt and dust. Praise to the mule, his
+clothes is mostly strings and flaps. Yes, the looks of the general man is
+agreeable to Clancy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I ask him, delicate, if, by any chance, he brought away anybody&rsquo;s
+money with him from Guatemala. He sighs and bumps his shoulders against the
+bench. Not a cent. All right. Maybe, he tells me, some of his friends in the
+tropic outfit will send him funds later. The general was as clear a case of no
+visible means as I ever saw.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I told him not to move from the bench, and then I went up to the corner
+of Poydras and Carondelet. Along there is O&rsquo;Hara&rsquo;s beat. In five
+minutes along comes O&rsquo;Hara, a big, fine man, red-faced, with
+shinin&rsquo; buttons, swingin&rsquo; his club. &rsquo;Twould be a fine thing
+for Guatemala to move into O&rsquo;Hara&rsquo;s precinct. &rsquo;Twould be a
+fine bit of recreation for Danny to suppress revolutions and uprisin&rsquo;s
+once or twice a week with his club.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Is 5046 workin&rsquo; yet, Danny?&rsquo; says I, walkin&rsquo; up
+to him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Overtime,&rsquo; says O&rsquo;Hara, lookin&rsquo; over me
+suspicious. &lsquo;Want some of it?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Fifty-forty-six is the celebrated city ordinance authorizin&rsquo;
+arrest, conviction and imprisonment of persons that succeed in concealin&rsquo;
+their crimes from the police.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Don&rsquo;t ye know Jimmy Clancy?&rsquo; says I. &lsquo;Ye
+pink-gilled monster.&rsquo; So, when O&rsquo;Hara recognized me beneath the
+scandalous exterior bestowed upon me by the tropics, I backed him into a
+doorway and told him what I wanted, and why I wanted it. &lsquo;All right,
+Jimmy,&rsquo; says O&rsquo;Hara. &lsquo;Go back and hold the bench. I&rsquo;ll
+be along in ten minutes.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;In that time O&rsquo;Hara strolled through Lafayette Square and spied
+two Weary Willies disgracin&rsquo; one of the benches. In ten minutes more J.
+Clancy and General De Vega, late candidate for the presidency of Guatemala, was
+in the station house. The general is badly frightened, and calls upon me to
+proclaim his distinguishments and rank.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;The man,&rsquo; says I to the police, &lsquo;used to be a
+railroad man. He&rsquo;s on the bum now. &rsquo;Tis a little bughouse he is, on
+account of losin&rsquo; his job.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;<i>Carrambos!</i>&rsquo; says the general, fizzin&rsquo; like a
+little soda-water fountain, &lsquo;you fought, señor, with my forces in my
+native country. Why do you say the lies? You shall say I am the General De
+Vega, one soldier, one <i>caballero</i>&mdash;&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Railroader,&rsquo; says I again. &lsquo;On the hog. No good. Been
+livin&rsquo; for three days on stolen bananas. Look at him. Ain&rsquo;t that
+enough?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Twenty-five dollars or sixty days, was what the recorder gave the
+general. He didn&rsquo;t have a cent, so he took the time. They let me go, as I
+knew they would, for I had money to show, and O&rsquo;Hara spoke for me. Yes;
+sixty days he got. &rsquo;Twas just so long that I slung a pick for the great
+country of Kam&mdash;Guatemala.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Clancy paused. The bright starlight showed a reminiscent look of happy content
+on his seasoned features. Keogh leaned in his chair and gave his partner a slap
+on his thinly-clad back that sounded like the crack of the surf on the sands.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Tell &rsquo;em, ye divil,&rdquo; he chuckled, &ldquo;how you got even
+with the tropical general in the way of agricultural manœuvrings.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Havin&rsquo; no money,&rdquo; concluded Clancy, with unction,
+&ldquo;they set him to work his fine out with a gang from the parish prison
+clearing Ursulines Street. Around the corner was a saloon decorated genially
+with electric fans and cool merchandise. I made that me headquarters, and every
+fifteen minutes I&rsquo;d walk around and take a look at the little man
+filibusterin&rsquo; with a rake and shovel. &rsquo;Twas just such a hot broth
+of a day as this has been. And I&rsquo;d call at him &lsquo;Hey,
+monseer!&rsquo; and he&rsquo;d look at me black, with the damp showin&rsquo;
+through his shirt in places.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Fat, strong mans,&rsquo; says I to General De Vega, &lsquo;is
+needed in New Orleans. Yes. To carry on the good work. Carrambos! Erin go
+bragh!&rsquo;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap11"></a>XI<br/>
+THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE</h2>
+
+<p>
+Breakfast in Coralio was at eleven. Therefore the people did not go to market
+early. The little wooden market-house stood on a patch of short-trimmed grass,
+under the vivid green foliage of a bread-fruit tree.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Thither one morning the venders leisurely convened, bringing their wares with
+them. A porch or platform six feet wide encircled the building, shaded from the
+mid-morning sun by the projecting, grass-thatched roof. Upon this platform the
+venders were wont to display their goods&mdash;newly-killed beef, fish, crabs,
+fruit of the country, cassava, eggs, <i>dulces</i> and high, tottering stacks
+of native tortillas as large around as the sombrero of a Spanish grandee.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But on this morning they whose stations lay on the seaward side of the
+market-house, instead of spreading their merchandise formed themselves into a
+softly jabbering and gesticulating group. For there upon their space of the
+platform was sprawled, asleep, the unbeautiful figure of
+&ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; Blythe. He lay upon a ragged strip of cocoa matting,
+more than ever a fallen angel in appearance. His suit of coarse flax, soiled,
+bursting at the seams, crumpled into a thousand diversified wrinkles and
+creases, inclosed him absurdly, like the garb of some effigy that had been
+stuffed in sport and thrown there after indignity had been wrought upon it. But
+firmly upon the high bridge of his nose reposed his gold-rimmed glasses, the
+surviving badge of his ancient glory.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The sun&rsquo;s rays, reflecting quiveringly from the rippling sea upon his
+face, and the voices of the market-men woke &ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; Blythe. He
+sat up, blinking, and leaned his back against the wall of the market. Drawing a
+blighted silk handkerchief from his pocket, he assiduously rubbed and burnished
+his glasses. And while doing this he became aware that his bedroom had been
+invaded, and that polite brown and yellow men were beseeching him to vacate in
+favour of their market stuff.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+If the señor would have the goodness&mdash;a thousand pardons for bringing to
+him molestation&mdash;but soon would come the <i>compradores</i> for the
+day&rsquo;s provisions&mdash;surely they had ten thousand regrets at disturbing
+him!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In this manner they expanded to him the intimation that he must clear out and
+cease to clog the wheels of trade.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Blythe stepped from the platform with the air of a prince leaving his canopied
+couch. He never quite lost that air, even at the lowest point of his fall. It
+is clear that the college of good breeding does not necessarily maintain a
+chair of morals within its walls.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Blythe shook out his wry clothing, and moved slowly up the Calle Grande through
+the hot sand. He moved without a destination in his mind. The little town was
+languidly stirring to its daily life. Golden-skinned babies tumbled over one
+another in the grass. The sea breeze brought him appetite, but nothing to
+satisfy it. Throughout Coralio were its morning odors&mdash;those from the
+heavily fragrant tropical flowers and from the bread baking in the outdoor
+ovens of clay and the pervading smoke of their fires. Where the smoke cleared,
+the crystal air, with some of the efficacy of faith, seemed to remove the
+mountains almost to the sea, bringing them so near that one might count the
+scarred glades on their wooded sides. The light-footed Caribs were swiftly
+gliding to their tasks at the waterside. Already along the bosky trails from
+the banana groves files of horses were slowly moving, concealed, except for
+their nodding heads and plodding legs, by the bunches of green-golden fruit
+heaped upon their backs. On doorsills sat women combing their long, black hair
+and calling, one to another, across the narrow thoroughfares. Peace reigned in
+Coralio&mdash;arid and bald peace; but still peace.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On that bright morning when Nature seemed to be offering the lotus on the
+Dawn&rsquo;s golden platter &ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; Blythe had reached rock
+bottom. Further descent seemed impossible. That last night&rsquo;s slumber in a
+public place had done for him. As long as he had had a roof to cover him there
+had remained, unbridged, the space that separates a gentleman from the beasts
+of the jungle and the fowls of the air. But now he was little more than a
+whimpering oyster led to be devoured on the sands of a Southern sea by the
+artful walrus, Circumstance, and the implacable carpenter, Fate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+To Blythe money was now but a memory. He had drained his friends of all that
+their good-fellowship had to offer; then he had squeezed them to the last drop
+of their generosity; and at the last, Aaron-like, he had smitten the rock of
+their hardening bosoms for the scattering, ignoble drops of Charity itself.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He had exhausted his credit to the last <i>real</i>. With the minute keenness
+of the shameless sponger he was aware of every source in Coralio from which a
+glass of rum, a meal or a piece of silver could be wheedled. Marshalling each
+such source in his mind, he considered it with all the thoroughness and
+penetration that hunger and thirst lent him for the task. All his optimism
+failed to thresh a grain of hope from the chaff of his postulations. He had
+played out the game. That one night in the open had shaken his nerves. Until
+then there had been left to him at least a few grounds upon which he could base
+his unblushing demands upon his neighbours&rsquo; stores. Now he must beg
+instead of borrowing. The most brazen sophistry could not dignify by the name
+of &ldquo;loan&rdquo; the coin contemptuously flung to a beachcomber who slept
+on the bare boards of the public market.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But on this morning no beggar would have more thankfully received a charitable
+coin, for the demon thirst had him by the throat&mdash;the drunkard&rsquo;s
+matutinal thirst that requires to be slaked at each morning station on the road
+to Tophet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Blythe walked slowly up the street, keeping a watchful eye for any miracle that
+might drop manna upon him in his wilderness. As he passed the popular eating
+house of Madama Vasquez, Madama&rsquo;s boarders were just sitting down to
+freshly-baked bread, <i>aguacates</i>, pines and delicious coffee that sent
+forth odorous guarantee of its quality upon the breeze. Madama was serving; she
+turned her shy, stolid, melancholy gaze for a moment out the window; she saw
+Blythe, and her expression turned more shy and embarrassed.
+&ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; owed her twenty <i>pesos</i>. He bowed as he had once
+bowed to less embarrassed dames to whom he owed nothing, and passed on.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Merchants and their clerks were throwing open the solid wooden doors of their
+shops. Polite but cool were the glances they cast upon Blythe as he lounged
+tentatively by with the remains of his old jaunty air; for they were his
+creditors almost without exception.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At the little fountain in the <i>plaza</i> he made an apology for a toilet with
+his wetted handkerchief. Across the open square filed the dolorous line of
+friends of the prisoners in the <i>calaboza</i>, bearing the morning meal of
+the immured. The food in their hands aroused small longing in Blythe. It was
+drink that his soul craved, or money to buy it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the streets he met many with whom he had been friends and equals, and whose
+patience and liberality he had gradually exhausted. Willard Geddie and Paula
+cantered past him with the coolest of nods, returning from their daily
+horseback ride along the old Indian road. Keogh passed him at another corner,
+whistling cheerfully and bearing a prize of newly-laid eggs for the breakfast
+of himself and Clancy. The jovial scout of Fortune was one of Blythe&rsquo;s
+victims who had plunged his hand oftenest into his pocket to aid him. But now
+it seemed that Keogh, too, had fortified himself against further invasions. His
+curt greeting and the ominous light in his full, grey eye quickened the steps
+of &ldquo;Beelzebub,&rdquo; whom desperation had almost incited to attempt an
+additional &ldquo;loan.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Three drinking shops the forlorn one next visited in succession. In all of
+these his money, his credit and his welcome had long since been spent; but
+Blythe felt that he would have fawned in the dust at the feet of an enemy that
+morning for one draught of <i>aguardiente</i>. In two of the <i>pulperias</i>
+his courageous petition for drink was met with a refusal so polite that it
+stung worse than abuse. The third establishment had acquired something of
+American methods; and here he was seized bodily and cast out upon his hands and
+knees.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This physical indignity caused a singular change in the man. As he picked
+himself up and walked away, an expression of absolute relief came upon his
+features. The specious and conciliatory smile that had been graven there was
+succeeded by a look of calm and sinister resolve. &ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; had
+been floundering in the sea of improbity, holding by a slender life-line to the
+respectable world that had cast him overboard. He must have felt that with this
+ultimate shock the line had snapped, and have experienced the welcome ease of
+the drowning swimmer who has ceased to struggle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Blythe walked to the next corner and stood there while he brushed the sand from
+his garments and re-polished his glasses.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got to do it&mdash;oh, I&rsquo;ve got to do it,&rdquo; he
+told himself, aloud. &ldquo;If I had a quart of rum I believe I could stave it
+off yet&mdash;for a little while. But there&rsquo;s no more rum
+for&mdash;&lsquo;Beelzebub,&rsquo; as they call me. By the flames of Tartarus!
+if I&rsquo;m to sit at the right hand of Satan somebody has got to pay the
+court expenses. You&rsquo;ll have to pony up, Mr. Frank Goodwin. You&rsquo;re a
+good fellow; but a gentleman must draw the line at being kicked into the
+gutter. Blackmail isn&rsquo;t a pretty word, but it&rsquo;s the next station on
+the road I&rsquo;m travelling.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+With purpose in his steps Blythe now moved rapidly through the town by way of
+its landward environs. He passed through the squalid quarters of the
+improvident negroes and on beyond the picturesque shacks of the poorer
+<i>mestizos</i>. From many points along his course he could see, through the
+umbrageous glades, the house of Frank Goodwin on its wooded hill. And as he
+crossed the little bridge over the lagoon he saw the old Indian, Galvez,
+scrubbing at the wooden slab that bore the name of Miraflores. Beyond the
+lagoon the lands of Goodwin began to slope gently upward. A grassy road, shaded
+by a munificent and diverse array of tropical flora wound from the edge of an
+outlying banana grove to the dwelling. Blythe took this road with long and
+purposeful strides.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin was seated on his coolest gallery, dictating letters to his secretary,
+a sallow and capable native youth. The household adhered to the American plan
+of breakfast; and that meal had been a thing of the past for the better part of
+an hour.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The castaway walked to the steps, and flourished a hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Good morning, Blythe,&rdquo; said Goodwin, looking up. &ldquo;Come in
+and have a chair. Anything I can do for you?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I want to speak to you in private.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin nodded at his secretary, who strolled out under a mango tree and lit a
+cigarette. Blythe took the chair that he had left vacant.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I want some money,&rdquo; he began, doggedly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;m sorry,&rdquo; said Goodwin, with equal directness, &ldquo;but
+you can&rsquo;t have any. You&rsquo;re drinking yourself to death, Blythe. Your
+friends have done all they could to help you to brace up. You won&rsquo;t help
+yourself. There&rsquo;s no use furnishing you with money to ruin yourself with
+any longer.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Dear man,&rdquo; said Blythe, tilting back his chair, &ldquo;it
+isn&rsquo;t a question of social economy now. It&rsquo;s past that. I like you,
+Goodwin; and I&rsquo;ve come to stick a knife between your ribs. I was kicked
+out of Espada&rsquo;s saloon this morning; and Society owes me reparation for
+my wounded feelings.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I didn&rsquo;t kick you out.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;No; but in a general way you represent Society; and in a particular way
+you represent my last chance. I&rsquo;ve had to come down to it, old
+man&mdash;I tried to do it a month ago when Losada&rsquo;s man was here turning
+things over; but I couldn&rsquo;t do it then. Now it&rsquo;s different. I want
+a thousand dollars, Goodwin; and you&rsquo;ll have to give it to me.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Only last week,&rdquo; said Goodwin, with a smile, &ldquo;a silver
+dollar was all you were asking for.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;An evidence,&rdquo; said Blythe, flippantly, &ldquo;that I was still
+virtuous&mdash;though under heavy pressure. The wages of sin should be
+something higher than a <i>peso</i> worth forty-eight cents. Let&rsquo;s talk
+business. I am the villain in the third act; and I must have my merited, if
+only temporary, triumph. I saw you collar the late president&rsquo;s valiseful
+of boodle. Oh, I know it&rsquo;s blackmail; but I&rsquo;m liberal about the
+price. I know I&rsquo;m a cheap villain&mdash;one of the regular sawmill-drama
+kind&mdash;but you&rsquo;re one of my particular friends, and I don&rsquo;t
+want to stick you hard.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Suppose you go into the details,&rdquo; suggested Goodwin, calmly
+arranging his letters on the table.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;All right,&rdquo; said &ldquo;Beelzebub.&rdquo; &ldquo;I like the way
+you take it. I despise histrionics; so you will please prepare yourself for the
+facts without any red fire, calcium or grace notes on the saxophone.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;On the night that His Fly-by-night Excellency arrived in town I was very
+drunk. You will excuse the pride with which I state that fact; but it was quite
+a feat for me to attain that desirable state. Somebody had left a cot out under
+the orange trees in the yard of Madama Ortiz&rsquo;s hotel. I stepped over the
+wall, laid down upon it, and fell asleep. I was awakened by an orange that
+dropped from the tree upon my nose; and I laid there for awhile cursing Sir
+Isaac Newton, or whoever it was that invented gravitation, for not confining
+his theory to apples.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;And then along came Mr. Miraflores and his true-love with the treasury
+in a valise, and went into the hotel. Next you hove in sight, and held a
+pow-wow with the tonsorial artist who insisted upon talking shop after hours. I
+tried to slumber again; but once more my rest was disturbed&mdash;this time by
+the noise of the popgun that went off upstairs. Then that valise came crashing
+down into an orange tree just above my head; and I arose from my couch, not
+knowing when it might begin to rain Saratoga trunks. When the army and the
+constabulary began to arrive, with their medals and decorations hastily pinned
+to their pajamas, and their snickersnees drawn, I crawled into the welcome
+shadow of a banana plant. I remained there for an hour, by which time the
+excitement and the people had cleared away. And then, my dear
+Goodwin&mdash;excuse me&mdash;I saw you sneak back and pluck that ripe and
+juicy valise from the orange tree. I followed you, and saw you take it to your
+own house. A hundred-thousand-dollar crop from one orange tree in a season
+about breaks the record of the fruit-growing industry.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Being a gentleman at that time, of course, I never mentioned the
+incident to anyone. But this morning I was kicked out of a saloon, my code of
+honour is all out at the elbows, and I&rsquo;d sell my mother&rsquo;s
+prayer-book for three fingers of <i>aguardiente</i>. I&rsquo;m not putting on
+the screws hard. It ought to be worth a thousand to you for me to have slept on
+that cot through the whole business without waking up and seeing
+anything.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Goodwin opened two more letters, and made memoranda in pencil on them. Then he
+called &ldquo;Manuel!&rdquo; to his secretary, who came, spryly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The <i>Ariel</i>&mdash;when does she sail?&rdquo; asked Goodwin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Señor,&rdquo; answered the youth, &ldquo;at three this afternoon. She
+drops down-coast to Punta Soledad to complete her cargo of fruit. From there
+she sails for New Orleans without delay.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Bueno!</i>&rdquo; said Goodwin. &ldquo;These letters may wait yet
+awhile.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The secretary returned to his cigarette under the mango tree.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;In round numbers,&rdquo; said Goodwin, facing Blythe squarely,
+&ldquo;how much money do you owe in this town, not including the sums you have
+&lsquo;borrowed&rsquo; from me?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Five hundred&mdash;at a rough guess,&rdquo; answered Blythe, lightly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Go somewhere in the town and draw up a schedule of your debts,&rdquo;
+said Goodwin. &ldquo;Come back here in two hours, and I will send Manuel with
+the money to pay them. I will also have a decent outfit of clothing ready for
+you. You will sail on the <i>Ariel</i> at three. Manuel will accompany you as
+far as the deck of the steamer. There he will hand you one thousand dollars in
+cash. I suppose that we needn&rsquo;t discuss what you will be expected to do
+in return.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Oh, I understand,&rdquo; piped Blythe, cheerily. &ldquo;I was asleep all
+the time on the cot under Madama Ortiz&rsquo;s orange trees; and I shake off
+the dust of Coralio forever. I&rsquo;ll play fair. No more of the lotus for me.
+Your proposition is O. K. You&rsquo;re a good fellow, Goodwin; and I let you
+off light. I&rsquo;ll agree to everything. But in the meantime&mdash;I&rsquo;ve
+a devil of a thirst on, old man&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not a <i>centavo</i>,&rdquo; said Goodwin, firmly, &ldquo;until you are
+on board the <i>Ariel</i>. You would be drunk in thirty minutes if you had
+money now.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But he noticed the blood-streaked eyeballs, the relaxed form and the shaking
+hands of &ldquo;Beelzebub;&rdquo; and he stepped into the dining room through
+the low window, and brought out a glass and a decanter of brandy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Take a bracer, anyway, before you go,&rdquo; he proposed, even as a man
+to the friend whom he entertains.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; Blythe&rsquo;s eyes glistened at the sight of the
+solace for which his soul burned. To-day for the first time his poisoned nerves
+had been denied their steadying dose; and their retort was a mounting torment.
+He grasped the decanter and rattled its crystal mouth against the glass in his
+trembling hand. He flushed the glass, and then stood erect, holding it aloft
+for an instant. For one fleeting moment he held his head above the drowning
+waves of his abyss. He nodded easily at Goodwin, raised his brimming glass and
+murmured a &ldquo;health&rdquo; that men had used in his ancient Paradise Lost.
+And then so suddenly that he spilled the brandy over his hand, he set down his
+glass, untasted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;In two hours,&rdquo; his dry lips muttered to Goodwin, as he marched
+down the steps and turned his face toward the town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the edge of the cool banana grove &ldquo;Beelzebub&rdquo; halted, and
+snapped the tongue of his belt buckle into another hole.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I couldn&rsquo;t do it,&rdquo; he explained, feverishly, to the waving
+banana fronds. &ldquo;I wanted to, but I couldn&rsquo;t. A gentleman
+can&rsquo;t drink with the man that he blackmails.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap12"></a>XII<br/>
+SHOES</h2>
+
+<p>
+John De Graffenreid Atwood ate of the lotus, root, stem, and flower. The
+tropics gobbled him up. He plunged enthusiastically into his work, which was to
+try to forget Rosine.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Now, they who dine on the lotus rarely consume it plain. There is a sauce <i>au
+diable</i> that goes with it; and the distillers are the chefs who prepare it.
+And on Johnny&rsquo;s menu card it read &ldquo;brandy.&rdquo; With a bottle
+between them, he and Billy Keogh would sit on the porch of the little consulate
+at night and roar out great, indecorous songs, until the natives, slipping
+hastily past, would shrug a shoulder and mutter things to themselves about the
+&ldquo;<i>Americanos diablos</i>.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One day Johnny&rsquo;s <i>mozo</i> brought the mail and dumped it on the table.
+Johnny leaned from his hammock, and fingered the four or five letters
+dejectedly. Keogh was sitting on the edge of the table chopping lazily with a
+paper knife at the legs of a centipede that was crawling among the stationery.
+Johnny was in that phase of lotus-eating when all the world tastes bitter in
+one&rsquo;s mouth.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Same old thing!&rdquo; he complained. &ldquo;Fool people writing for
+information about the country. They want to know all about raising fruit, and
+how to make a fortune without work. Half of &rsquo;em don&rsquo;t even send
+stamps for a reply. They think a consul hasn&rsquo;t anything to do but write
+letters. Slit those envelopes for me, old man, and see what they want.
+I&rsquo;m feeling too rocky to move.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh, acclimated beyond all possibility of ill-humour, drew his chair to the
+table with smiling compliance on his rose-pink countenance, and began to slit
+open the letters. Four of them were from citizens in various parts of the
+United States who seemed to regard the consul at Coralio as a cyclopædia of
+information. They asked long lists of questions, numerically arranged, about
+the climate, products, possibilities, laws, business chances, and statistics of
+the country in which the consul had the honour of representing his own
+government.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Write &rsquo;em, please, Billy,&rdquo; said that inert official,
+&ldquo;just a line, referring them to the latest consular report. Tell
+&rsquo;em the State Department will be delighted to furnish the literary gems.
+Sign my name. Don&rsquo;t let your pen scratch, Billy; it&rsquo;ll keep me
+awake.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t snore,&rdquo; said Keogh, amiably, &ldquo;and I&rsquo;ll do
+your work for you. You need a corps of assistants, anyhow. Don&rsquo;t see how
+you ever get out a report. Wake up a minute!&mdash;here&rsquo;s one more
+letter&mdash;it&rsquo;s from your own town, too&mdash;Dalesburg.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That so?&rdquo; murmured Johnny showing a mild and obligatory interest.
+&ldquo;What&rsquo;s it about?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Postmaster writes,&rdquo; explained Keogh. &ldquo;Says a citizen of the
+town wants some facts and advice from you. Says the citizen has an idea in his
+head of coming down where you are and opening a shoe store. Wants to know if
+you think the business would pay. Says he&rsquo;s heard of the boom along this
+coast, and wants to get in on the ground floor.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In spite of the heat and his bad temper, Johnny&rsquo;s hammock swayed with his
+laughter. Keogh laughed too; and the pet monkey on the top shelf of the
+bookcase chattered in shrill sympathy with the ironical reception of the letter
+from Dalesburg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Great bunions!&rdquo; exclaimed the consul. &ldquo;Shoe store!
+What&rsquo;ll they ask about next, I wonder? Overcoat factory, I reckon. Say,
+Billy&mdash;of our 3,000 citizens, how many do you suppose ever had on a pair
+of shoes?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh reflected judicially.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Let&rsquo;s see&mdash;there&rsquo;s you and me and&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not me,&rdquo; said Johnny, promptly and incorrectly, holding up a foot
+encased in a disreputable deerskin <i>zapato</i>. &ldquo;I haven&rsquo;t been a
+victim to shoes in months.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;But you&rsquo;ve got &rsquo;em, though,&rdquo; went on Keogh. &ldquo;And
+there&rsquo;s Goodwin and Blanchard and Geddie and old Lutz and Doc Gregg and
+that Italian that&rsquo;s agent for the banana company, and there&rsquo;s old
+Delgado&mdash;no; he wears sandals. And, oh, yes; there&rsquo;s Madama Ortiz,
+&lsquo;what kapes the hotel&rsquo;&mdash;she had on a pair of red slippers at
+the <i>baile</i> the other night. And Miss Pasa, her daughter, that went to
+school in the States&mdash;she brought back some civilized notions in the way
+of footgear. And there&rsquo;s the <i>comandante&rsquo;s</i> sister that
+dresses up her feet on feast-days&mdash;and Mrs. Geddie, who wears a two with a
+Castilian instep&mdash;and that&rsquo;s about all the ladies. Let&rsquo;s
+see&mdash;don&rsquo;t some of the soldiers at the <i>cuartel</i>&mdash;no:
+that&rsquo;s so; they&rsquo;re allowed shoes only when on the march. In
+barracks they turn their little toeses out to grass.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&rsquo;Bout right,&rdquo; agreed the consul. &ldquo;Not over twenty out
+of the three thousand ever felt leather on their walking arrangements. Oh, yes;
+Coralio is just the town for an enterprising shoe store&mdash;that
+doesn&rsquo;t want to part with its goods. Wonder if old Patterson is trying to
+jolly me! He always was full of things he called jokes. Write him a letter,
+Billy. I&rsquo;ll dictate it. We&rsquo;ll jolly him back a few.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh dipped his pen, and wrote at Johnny&rsquo;s dictation. With many pauses,
+filled in with smoke and sundry travellings of the bottle and glasses, the
+following reply to the Dalesburg communication was perpetrated:
+</p>
+
+<p class="letter">
+Mr. Obadiah Patterson,<br/>
+    Dalesburg, Ala.<br/>
+    <i>Dear Sir:</i> In reply to your favour of July 2d, I have the honour to
+inform you that, according to my opinion, there is no place on the habitable
+globe that presents to the eye stronger evidence of the need of a first-class
+shoe store than does the town of Coralio. There are 3,000 inhabitants in the
+place, and not a single shoe store! The situation speaks for itself. This coast
+is rapidly becoming the goal of enterprising business men, but the shoe
+business is one that has been sadly overlooked or neglected. In fact, there are
+a considerable number of our citizens actually without shoes at present.<br/>
+    Besides the want above mentioned, there is also a crying need for a
+brewery, a college of higher mathematics, a coal yard, and a clean and
+intellectual Punch and Judy show. I have the honour to be, sir,
+</p>
+
+<p class="right">
+Your Obt. Servant,<br/>
+J<small>OHN</small> D<small>E</small> G<small>RAFFENREID</small>
+A<small>TWOOD</small>,<br/>
+U. S. Consul at Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p class="letter">
+P.S.&mdash;Hello! Uncle Obadiah. How&rsquo;s the old burg racking along? What
+would the government do without you and me? Look out for a green-headed parrot
+and a bunch of bananas soon, from your old friend
+</p>
+
+<p class="right">
+J<small>OHNNY</small>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I throw in that postscript,&rdquo; explained the consul, &ldquo;so Uncle
+Obadiah won&rsquo;t take offence at the official tone of the letter! Now,
+Billy, you get that correspondence fixed up, and send Pancho to the post-office
+with it. The <i>Ariadne</i> takes the mail out to-morrow if they make up that
+load of fruit to-day.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The night programme in Coralio never varied. The recreations of the people were
+soporific and flat. They wandered about, barefoot and aimless, speaking lowly
+and smoking cigar or cigarette. Looking down on the dimly lighted ways one
+seemed to see a threading maze of brunette ghosts tangled with a procession of
+insane fireflies. In some houses the thrumming of lugubrious guitars added to
+the depression of the <i>triste</i> night. Giant tree-frogs rattled in the
+foliage as loudly as the end man&rsquo;s &ldquo;bones&rdquo; in a minstrel
+troupe. By nine o&rsquo;clock the streets were almost deserted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Nor at the consulate was there often a change of bill. Keogh would come there
+nightly, for Coralio&rsquo;s one cool place was the little seaward porch of
+that official residence.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The brandy would be kept moving; and before midnight sentiment would begin to
+stir in the heart of the self-exiled consul. Then he would relate to Keogh the
+story of his ended romance. Each night Keogh would listen patiently to the
+tale, and be ready with untiring sympathy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;But don&rsquo;t you think for a minute&rdquo;&mdash;thus Johnny would
+always conclude his woeful narrative&mdash;&ldquo;that I&rsquo;m grieving about
+that girl, Billy. I&rsquo;ve forgotten her. She never enters my mind. If she
+were to enter that door right now, my pulse wouldn&rsquo;t gain a beat.
+That&rsquo;s all over long ago.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t I know it?&rdquo; Keogh would answer. &ldquo;Of course
+you&rsquo;ve forgotten her. Proper thing to do. Wasn&rsquo;t quite O. K. of her
+to listen to the knocks that&mdash;er&mdash;Dink Pawson kept giving you.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Pink Dawson!&rdquo;&mdash;a world of contempt would be in Johnny&rsquo;s
+tones&mdash;&ldquo;Poor white trash! That&rsquo;s what he was. Had five hundred
+acres of farming land, though; and that counted. Maybe I&rsquo;ll have a chance
+to get back at him some day. The Dawsons weren&rsquo;t anybody. Everybody in
+Alabama knows the Atwoods. Say, Billy&mdash;did you know my mother was a De
+Graffenreid?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Why, no,&rdquo; Keogh would say; &ldquo;is that so?&rdquo; He had heard
+it some three hundred times.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Fact. The De Graffenreids of Hancock County. But I never think of that
+girl any more, do I, Billy?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Not for a minute, my boy,&rdquo; would be the last sounds heard by the
+conqueror of Cupid.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At this point Johnny would fall into a gentle slumber, and Keogh would saunter
+out to his own shack under the calabash tree at the edge of the plaza.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In a day or two the letter from the Dalesburg postmaster and its answer had
+been forgotten by the Coralio exiles. But on the 26th day of July the fruit of
+the reply appeared upon the tree of events.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The <i>Andador</i>, a fruit steamer that visited Coralio regularly, drew into
+the offing and anchored. The beach was lined with spectators while the
+quarantine doctor and the custom-house crew rowed out to attend to their
+duties.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+An hour later Billy Keogh lounged into the consulate, clean and cool in his
+linen clothes, and grinning like a pleased shark.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Guess what?&rdquo; he said to Johnny, lounging in his hammock.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Too hot to guess,&rdquo; said Johnny, lazily.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Your shoe-store man&rsquo;s come,&rdquo; said Keogh, rolling the sweet
+morsel on his tongue, &ldquo;with a stock of goods big enough to supply the
+continent as far down as Terra del Fuego. They&rsquo;re carting his cases over
+to the custom-house now. Six barges full they brought ashore and have paddled
+back for the rest. Oh, ye saints in glory! won&rsquo;t there be regalements in
+the air when he gets onto the joke and has an interview with Mr. Consul?
+It&rsquo;ll be worth nine years in the tropics just to witness that one joyful
+moment.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh loved to take his mirth easily. He selected a clean place on the matting
+and lay upon the floor. The walls shook with his enjoyment. Johnny turned half
+over and blinked.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t tell me,&rdquo; he said, &ldquo;that anybody was fool enough
+to take that letter seriously.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Four-thousand-dollar stock of goods!&rdquo; gasped Keogh, in ecstasy.
+&ldquo;Talk about coals to Newcastle! Why didn&rsquo;t he take a ship-load of
+palm-leaf fans to Spitzbergen while he was about it? Saw the old codger on the
+beach. You ought to have been there when he put on his specs and squinted at
+the five hundred or so barefooted citizens standing around.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Are you telling the truth, Billy?&rdquo; asked the consul, weakly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Am I? You ought to see the buncoed gentleman&rsquo;s daughter he brought
+along. Looks! She makes the brick-dust señoritas here look like
+tar-babies.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Go on,&rdquo; said Johnny, &ldquo;if you can stop that asinine giggling.
+I hate to see a grown man make a laughing hyena of himself.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Name is Hemstetter,&rdquo; went on Keogh. &ldquo;He&rsquo;s a&mdash;
+Hello! what&rsquo;s the matter now?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Johnny&rsquo;s moccasined feet struck the floor with a thud as he wriggled out
+of his hammock.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Get up, you idiot,&rdquo; he said, sternly, &ldquo;or I&rsquo;ll brain
+you with this inkstand. That&rsquo;s Rosine and her father. Gad! what a
+drivelling idiot old Patterson is! Get up, here, Billy Keogh, and help me. What
+the devil are we going to do? Has all the world gone crazy?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh rose and dusted himself. He managed to regain a decorous demeanour.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Situation has got to be met, Johnny,&rdquo; he said, with some success
+at seriousness. &ldquo;I didn&rsquo;t think about its being your girl until you
+spoke. First thing to do is to get them comfortable quarters. You go down and
+face the music, and I&rsquo;ll trot out to Goodwin&rsquo;s and see if Mrs.
+Goodwin won&rsquo;t take them in. They&rsquo;ve got the decentest house in
+town.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Bless you, Billy!&rdquo; said the consul. &ldquo;I knew you
+wouldn&rsquo;t desert me. The world&rsquo;s bound to come to an end, but maybe
+we can stave it off for a day or two.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh hoisted his umbrella and set out for Goodwin&rsquo;s house. Johnny put on
+his coat and hat. He picked up the brandy bottle, but set it down again without
+drinking, and marched bravely down to the beach.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the shade of the custom-house walls he found Mr. Hemstetter and Rosine
+surrounded by a mass of gaping citizens. The customs officers were ducking and
+scraping, while the captain of the <i>Andador</i> interpreted the business of
+the new arrivals. Rosine looked healthy and very much alive. She was gazing at
+the strange scenes around her with amused interest. There was a faint blush
+upon her round cheek as she greeted her old admirer. Mr. Hemstetter shook hands
+with Johnny in a very friendly way. He was an oldish, impractical man&mdash;one
+of that numerous class of erratic business men who are forever dissatisfied,
+and seeking a change.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I am very glad to see you, John&mdash;may I call you John?&rdquo; he
+said. &ldquo;Let me thank you for your prompt answer to our postmaster&rsquo;s
+letter of inquiry. He volunteered to write to you on my behalf. I was looking
+about for something different in the way of a business in which the profits
+would be greater. I had noticed in the papers that this coast was receiving
+much attention from investors. I am extremely grateful for your advice to come.
+I sold out everything that I possess, and invested the proceeds in as fine a
+stock of shoes as could be bought in the North. You have a picturesque town
+here, John. I hope business will be as good as your letter justifies me in
+expecting.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Johnny&rsquo;s agony was abbreviated by the arrival of Keogh, who hurried up
+with the news that Mrs. Goodwin would be much pleased to place rooms at the
+disposal of Mr. Hemstetter and his daughter. So there Mr. Hemstetter and Rosine
+were at once conducted and left to recuperate from the fatigue of the voyage,
+while Johnny went down to see that the cases of shoes were safely stored in the
+customs warehouse pending their examination by the officials. Keogh, grinning
+like a shark, skirmished about to find Goodwin, to instruct him not to expose
+to Mr. Hemstetter the true state of Coralio as a shoe market until Johnny had
+been given a chance to redeem the situation, if such a thing were possible.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+That night the consul and Keogh held a desperate consultation on the breezy
+porch of the consulate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Send &rsquo;em back home,&rdquo; began Keogh, reading Johnny&rsquo;s
+thoughts.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I would,&rdquo; said Johnny, after a little silence; &ldquo;but
+I&rsquo;ve been lying to you, Billy.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;All right about that,&rdquo; said Keogh, affably.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;ve told you hundreds of times,&rdquo; said Johnny, slowly,
+&ldquo;that I had forgotten that girl, haven&rsquo;t I?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;About three hundred and seventy-five,&rdquo; admitted the monument of
+patience.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I lied,&rdquo; repeated the consul, &ldquo;every time. I never forgot
+her for one minute. I was an obstinate ass for running away just because she
+said &lsquo;No&rsquo; once. And I was too proud a fool to go back. I talked
+with Rosine a few minutes this evening up at Goodwin&rsquo;s. I found out one
+thing. You remember that farmer fellow who was always after her?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Dink Pawson?&rdquo; asked Keogh.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Pink Dawson. Well, he wasn&rsquo;t a hill of beans to her. She says she
+didn&rsquo;t believe a word of the things he told her about me. But I&rsquo;m
+sewed up now, Billy. That tomfool letter we sent ruined whatever chance I had
+left. She&rsquo;ll despise me when she finds out that her old father has been
+made the victim of a joke that a decent school boy wouldn&rsquo;t have been
+guilty of. Shoes! Why he couldn&rsquo;t sell twenty pairs of shoes in Coralio
+if he kept store here for twenty years. You put a pair of shoes on one of these
+Caribs or Spanish brown boys and what&rsquo;d he do? Stand on his head and
+squeal until he&rsquo;d kicked &rsquo;em off. None of &rsquo;em ever wore shoes
+and they never will. If I send &rsquo;em back home I&rsquo;ll have to tell the
+whole story, and what&rsquo;ll she think of me? I want that girl worse than
+ever, Billy, and now when she&rsquo;s in reach I&rsquo;ve lost her forever
+because I tried to be funny when the thermometer was at 102.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Keep cheerful,&rdquo; said the optimistic Keogh. &ldquo;And let
+&rsquo;em open the store. I&rsquo;ve been busy myself this afternoon. We can
+stir up a temporary boom in foot-gear anyhow. I&rsquo;ll buy six pairs when the
+doors open. I&rsquo;ve been around and seen all the fellows and explained the
+catastrophe. They&rsquo;ll all buy shoes like they was centipedes. Frank
+Goodwin will take cases of &rsquo;em. The Geddies want about eleven pairs
+between &rsquo;em. Clancy is going to invest the savings of weeks, and even old
+Doc Gregg wants three pairs of alligator-hide slippers if they&rsquo;ve got any
+tens. Blanchard got a look at Miss Hemstetter; and as he&rsquo;s a Frenchman,
+no less than a dozen pairs will do for him.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;A dozen customers,&rdquo; said Johnny, &ldquo;for a $4,000 stock of
+shoes! It won&rsquo;t work. There&rsquo;s a big problem here to figure out. You
+go home, Billy, and leave me alone. I&rsquo;ve got to work at it all by myself.
+Take that bottle of Three-star along with you&mdash;no, sir; not another ounce
+of booze for the United States consul. I&rsquo;ll sit here to-night and pull
+out the think stop. If there&rsquo;s a soft place on this proposition anywhere
+I&rsquo;ll land on it. If there isn&rsquo;t there&rsquo;ll be another wreck to
+the credit of the gorgeous tropics.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh left, feeling that he could be of no use. Johnny laid a handful of cigars
+on a table and stretched himself in a steamer chair. When the sudden daylight
+broke, silvering the harbour ripples, he was still sitting there. Then he got
+up, whistling a little tune, and took his bath.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At nine o&rsquo;clock he walked down to the dingy little cable office and hung
+for half an hour over a blank. The result of his application was the following
+message, which he signed and had transmitted at a cost of $33:
+</p>
+
+<p class="letter">
+T<small>O</small> P<small>INKNEY</small> D<small>AWSON</small>,<br/>
+    Dalesburg, Ala.<br/>
+    Draft for $100 comes to you next mail. Ship me immediately 500 pounds
+stiff, dry cockleburrs. New use here in arts. Market price twenty cents pound.
+Further orders likely. Rush.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap13"></a>XIII<br/>
+SHIPS</h2>
+
+<p>
+Within a week a suitable building had been secured in the Calle Grande, and Mr.
+Hemstetter&rsquo;s stock of shoes arranged upon their shelves. The rent of the
+store was moderate; and the stock made a fine showing of neat white boxes,
+attractively displayed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Johnny&rsquo;s friends stood by him loyally. On the first day Keogh strolled
+into the store in a casual kind of way about once every hour, and bought shoes.
+After he had purchased a pair each of extension soles, congress gaiters, button
+kids, low-quartered calfs, dancing pumps, rubber boots, tans of various hues,
+tennis shoes and flowered slippers, he sought out Johnny to be prompted as to
+names of other kinds that he might inquire for. The other English-speaking
+residents also played their parts nobly by buying often and liberally. Keogh
+was grand marshal, and made them distribute their patronage, thus keeping up a
+fair run of custom for several days.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Hemstetter was gratified by the amount of business done thus far; but
+expressed surprise that the natives were so backward with their custom.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Oh, they&rsquo;re awfully shy,&rdquo; explained Johnny, as he wiped his
+forehead nervously. &ldquo;They&rsquo;ll get the habit pretty soon.
+They&rsquo;ll come with a rush when they do come.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One afternoon Keogh dropped into the consul&rsquo;s office, chewing an
+unlighted cigar thoughtfully.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Got anything up your sleeve?&rdquo; he inquired of Johnny. &ldquo;If you
+have it&rsquo;s about time to show it. If you can borrow some gent&rsquo;s hat
+in the audience, and make a lot of customers for an idle stock of shoes come
+out of it, you&rsquo;d better spiel. The boys have all laid in enough footwear
+to last &rsquo;em ten years; and there&rsquo;s nothing doing in the shoe store
+but dolcy far nienty. I just came by there. Your venerable victim was standing
+in the door, gazing through his specs at the bare toes passing by his emporium.
+The natives here have got the true artistic temperament. Me and Clancy took
+eighteen tintypes this morning in two hours. There&rsquo;s been but one pair of
+shoes sold all day. Blanchard went in and bought a pair of fur-lined
+house-slippers because he thought he saw Miss Hemstetter go into the store. I
+saw him throw the slippers into the lagoon afterwards.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;There&rsquo;s a Mobile fruit steamer coming in to-morrow or next
+day,&rdquo; said Johnny. &ldquo;We can&rsquo;t do anything until then.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What are you going to do&mdash;try to create a demand?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Political economy isn&rsquo;t your strong point,&rdquo; said the consul,
+impudently. &ldquo;You can&rsquo;t create a demand. But you can create a
+necessity for a demand. That&rsquo;s what I am going to do.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Two weeks after the consul sent his cable, a fruit steamer brought him a huge,
+mysterious brown bale of some unknown commodity. Johnny&rsquo;s influence with
+the custom-house people was sufficiently strong for him to get the goods turned
+over to him without the usual inspection. He had the bale taken to the
+consulate and snugly stowed in the back room.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+That night he ripped open a corner of it and took out a handful of the
+cockleburrs. He examined them with the care with which a warrior examines his
+arms before he goes forth to battle for his lady-love and life. The burrs were
+the ripe August product, as hard as filberts, and bristling with spines as
+tough and sharp as needles. Johnny whistled softly a little tune, and went out
+to find Billy Keogh.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Later in the night, when Coralio was steeped in slumber, he and Billy went
+forth into the deserted streets with their coats bulging like balloons. All up
+and down the Calle Grande they went, sowing the sharp burrs carefully in the
+sand, along the narrow sidewalks, in every foot of grass between the silent
+houses. And then they took the side streets and by-ways, missing none. No place
+where the foot of man, woman or child might fall was slighted. Many trips they
+made to and from the prickly hoard. And then, nearly at the dawn, they laid
+themselves down to rest calmly, as great generals do after planning a victory
+according to the revised tactics, and slept, knowing that they had sowed with
+the accuracy of Satan sowing tares and the perseverance of Paul planting.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+With the rising sun came the purveyors of fruits and meats, and arranged their
+wares in and around the little market-house. At one end of the town near the
+seashore the market-house stood; and the sowing of the burrs had not been
+carried that far. The dealers waited long past the hour when their sales
+usually began. None came to buy. &ldquo;<i>Qué hay?</i>&rdquo; they began to
+exclaim, one to another.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At their accustomed time, from every &rsquo;dobe and palm hut and
+grass-thatched shack and dim <i>patio</i> glided women&mdash;black women, brown
+women, lemon-colored women, women dun and yellow and tawny. They were the
+marketers starting to purchase the family supply of cassava, plantains, meat,
+fowls, and tortillas. Décolleté they were and bare-armed and bare-footed, with
+a single skirt reaching below the knee. Stolid and ox-eyed, they stepped from
+their doorways into the narrow paths or upon the soft grass of the streets.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first to emerge uttered ambiguous squeals, and raised one foot quickly.
+Another step and they sat down, with shrill cries of alarm, to pick at the new
+and painful insects that had stung them upon the feet. &ldquo;<i>Qué picadores
+diablos!</i>&rdquo; they screeched to one another across the narrow ways. Some
+tried the grass instead of the paths, but there they were also stung and bitten
+by the strange little prickly balls. They plumped down in the grass, and added
+their lamentations to those of their sisters in the sandy paths. All through
+the town was heard the plaint of the feminine jabber. The venders in the market
+still wondered why no customers came.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then men, lords of the earth, came forth. They, too, began to hop, to dance, to
+limp, and to curse. They stood stranded and foolish, or stooped to pluck at the
+scourge that attacked their feet and ankles. Some loudly proclaimed the pest to
+be poisonous spiders of an unknown species.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And then the children ran out for their morning romp. And now to the uproar was
+added the howls of limping infants and cockleburred childhood. Every minute the
+advancing day brought forth fresh victims.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Doña Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas stepped from her honoured
+doorway, as was her daily custom, to procure fresh bread from the
+<i>panaderia</i> across the street. She was clad in a skirt of flowered yellow
+satin, a chemise of ruffled linen, and wore a purple mantilla from the looms of
+Spain. Her lemon-tinted feet, alas! were bare. Her progress was majestic, for
+were not her ancestors hidalgos of Aragon? Three steps she made across the
+velvety grass, and set her aristocratic sole upon a bunch of Johnny&rsquo;s
+burrs. Doña Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas emitted a yowl even as a
+wild-cat. Turning about, she fell upon hands and knees, and crawled&mdash;ay,
+like a beast of the field she crawled back to her honourable door-sill.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Don Señor Ildefonso Federico Valdazar, <i>Juez de la Paz</i>, weighing twenty
+stone, attempted to convey his bulk to the <i>pulperia</i> at the corner of the
+plaza in order to assuage his matutinal thirst. The first plunge of his unshod
+foot into the cool grass struck a concealed mine. Don Ildefonso fell like a
+crumpled cathedral, crying out that he had been fatally bitten by a deadly
+scorpion. Everywhere were the shoeless citizens hopping, stumbling, limping,
+and picking from their feet the venomous insects that had come in a single
+night to harass them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first to perceive the remedy was Estebán Delgado, the barber, a man of
+travel and education. Sitting upon a stone, he plucked burrs from his toes, and
+made oration:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Behold, my friends, these bugs of the devil! I know them well. They soar
+through the skies in swarms like pigeons. These are the dead ones that fell
+during the night. In Yucatan I have seen them as large as oranges. Yes! There
+they hiss like serpents, and have wings like bats. It is the shoes&mdash;the
+shoes that one needs! <i>Zapatos&mdash;zapatos para mi!</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Estebán hobbled to Mr. Hemstetter&rsquo;s store, and bought shoes. Coming out,
+he swaggered down the street with impunity, reviling loudly the bugs of the
+devil. The suffering ones sat up or stood upon one foot and beheld the immune
+barber. Men, women and children took up the cry: &ldquo;<i>Zapatos!
+zapatos!</i>&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The necessity for the demand had been created. The demand followed. That day
+Mr. Hemstetter sold three hundred pairs of shoes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It is really surprising,&rdquo; he said to Johnny, who came up in the
+evening to help him straighten out the stock, &ldquo;how trade is picking up.
+Yesterday I made but three sales.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I told you they&rsquo;d whoop things up when they got started,&rdquo;
+said the consul.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I think I shall order a dozen more cases of goods, to keep the stock
+up,&rdquo; said Mr. Hemstetter, beaming through his spectacles.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I wouldn&rsquo;t send in any orders yet,&rdquo; advised Johnny.
+&ldquo;Wait till you see how the trade holds up.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Each night Johnny and Keogh sowed the crop that grew dollars by day. At the end
+of ten days two-thirds of the stock of shoes had been sold; and the stock of
+cockleburrs was exhausted. Johnny cabled to Pink Dawson for another 500 pounds,
+paying twenty cents per pound as before. Mr. Hemstetter carefully made up an
+order for $1500 worth of shoes from Northern firms. Johnny hung about the store
+until this order was ready for the mail, and succeeded in destroying it before
+it reached the postoffice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+That night he took Rosine under the mango tree by Goodwin&rsquo;s porch, and
+confessed everything. She looked him in the eye, and said: &ldquo;You are a
+very wicked man. Father and I will go back home. You say it was a joke? I think
+it is a very serious matter.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But at the end of half an hour&rsquo;s argument the conversation had been
+turned upon a different subject. The two were considering the respective merits
+of pale blue and pink wall paper with which the old colonial mansion of the
+Atwoods in Dalesburg was to be decorated after the wedding.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On the next morning Johnny confessed to Mr. Hemstetter. The shoe merchant put
+on his spectacles, and said through them: &ldquo;You strike me as being a most
+extraordinary young scamp. If I had not managed this enterprise with good
+business judgment my entire stock of goods might have been a complete loss.
+Now, how do you propose to dispose of the rest of it?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the second invoice of cockleburrs arrived Johnny loaded them and the
+remainder of the shoes into a schooner, and sailed down the coast to Alazan.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There, in the same dark and diabolical manner, he repeated his success; and
+came back with a bag of money and not so much as a shoestring.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And then he besought his great Uncle of the waving goatee and starred vest to
+accept his resignation, for the lotus no longer lured him. He hankered for the
+spinach and cress of Dalesburg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The services of Mr. William Terence Keogh as acting consul, <i>pro tem.</i>,
+were suggested and accepted, and Johnny sailed with the Hemstetters back to his
+native shores.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh slipped into the sinecure of the American consulship with the ease that
+never left him even in such high places. The tintype establishment was soon to
+become a thing of the past, although its deadly work along the peaceful and
+helpless Spanish Main was never effaced. The restless partners were about to be
+off again, scouting ahead of the slow ranks of Fortune. But now they would take
+different ways. There were rumours of a promising uprising in Peru; and thither
+the martial Clancy would turn his adventurous steps. As for Keogh, he was
+figuring in his mind and on quires of Government letter-heads a scheme that
+dwarfed the art of misrepresenting the human countenance upon tin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What suits me,&rdquo; Keogh used to say, &ldquo;in the way of a business
+proposition is something diversified that looks like a longer shot than it
+is&mdash;something in the way of a genteel graft that isn&rsquo;t worked enough
+for the correspondence schools to be teaching it by mail. I take the long end;
+but I like to have at least as good a chance to win as a man learning to play
+poker on an ocean steamer, or running for governor of Texas on the Republican
+ticket. And when I cash in my winnings, I don&rsquo;t want to find any
+widows&rsquo; and orphans&rsquo; chips in my stack.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The grass-grown globe was the green table on which Keogh gambled. The games he
+played were of his own invention. He was no grubber after the diffident dollar.
+Nor did he care to follow it with horn and hounds. Rather he loved to coax it
+with egregious and brilliant flies from its habitat in the waters of strange
+streams. Yet Keogh was a business man; and his schemes, in spite of their
+singularity, were as solidly set as the plans of a building contractor. In
+Arthur&rsquo;s time Sir William Keogh would have been a Knight of the Round
+Table. In these modern days he rides abroad, seeking the Graft instead of the
+Grail.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Three days after Johnny&rsquo;s departure, two small schooners appeared off
+Coralio. After some delay a boat put off from one of them, and brought a
+sunburned young man ashore. This young man had a shrewd and calculating eye;
+and he gazed with amazement at the strange things that he saw. He found on the
+beach some one who directed him to the consul&rsquo;s office; and thither he
+made his way at a nervous gait.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh was sprawled in the official chair, drawing caricatures of his
+Uncle&rsquo;s head on an official pad of paper. He looked up at his visitor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Where&rsquo;s Johnny Atwood?&rdquo; inquired the sunburned young man, in
+a business tone.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Gone,&rdquo; said Keogh, working carefully at Uncle Sam&rsquo;s necktie.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s just like him,&rdquo; remarked the nut-brown one, leaning
+against the table. &ldquo;He always was a fellow to gallivant around instead of
+&rsquo;tending to business. Will he be in soon?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t think so,&rdquo; said Keogh, after a fair amount of
+deliberation.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I s&rsquo;pose he&rsquo;s out at some of his tomfoolery,&rdquo;
+conjectured the visitor, in a tone of virtuous conviction. &ldquo;Johnny never
+would stick to anything long enough to succeed. I wonder how he manages to run
+his business here, and never be &rsquo;round to look after it.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;m looking after the business just now,&rdquo; admitted the
+<i>pro tem.</i> consul.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Are you&mdash;then, say!&mdash;where&rsquo;s the factory?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What factory?&rdquo; asked Keogh, with a mildly polite interest.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Why, the factory where they use them cockleburrs. Lord knows what they
+use &rsquo;em for, anyway! I&rsquo;ve got the basements of both them ships out
+there loaded with &rsquo;em. I&rsquo;ll give you a bargain in this lot.
+I&rsquo;ve had every man, woman and child around Dalesburg that wasn&rsquo;t
+busy pickin&rsquo; &rsquo;em for a month. I hired these ships to bring
+&rsquo;em over. Everybody thought I was crazy. Now, you can have this lot for
+fifteen cents a pound, delivered on land. And if you want more I guess old
+Alabam&rsquo; can come up to the demand. Johnny told me when he left home that
+if he struck anything down here that there was any money in he&rsquo;d let me
+in on it. Shall I drive the ships in and hitch?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A look of supreme, almost incredulous, delight dawned in Keogh&rsquo;s ruddy
+countenance. He dropped his pencil. His eyes turned upon the sunburned young
+man with joy in them mingled with fear lest his ecstasy should prove a dream.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;For God&rsquo;s sake, tell me,&rdquo; said Keogh, earnestly, &ldquo;are
+you Dink Pawson?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;My name is Pinkney Dawson,&rdquo; said the cornerer of the cockleburr
+market.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Billy Keogh slid rapturously and gently from his chair to his favourite strip
+of matting on the floor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were not many sounds in Coralio on that sultry afternoon. Among those
+that were may be mentioned a noise of enraptured and unrighteous laughter from
+a prostrate Irish-American, while a sunburned young man, with a shrewd eye,
+looked on him with wonder and amazement. Also the &ldquo;tramp, tramp,
+tramp&rdquo; of many well-shod feet in the streets outside. Also the lonesome
+wash of the waves that beat along the historic shores of the Spanish Main.
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap14"></a>XIV<br/>
+MASTERS OF ARTS</h2>
+
+<p>
+A two-inch stub of a blue pencil was the wand with which Keogh performed the
+preliminary acts of his magic. So, with this he covered paper with diagrams and
+figures while he waited for the United States of America to send down to
+Coralio a successor to Atwood, resigned.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The new scheme that his mind had conceived, his stout heart indorsed, and his
+blue pencil corroborated, was laid around the characteristics and human
+frailties of the new president of Anchuria. These characteristics, and the
+situation out of which Keogh hoped to wrest a golden tribute, deserve
+chronicling contributive to the clear order of events.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+President Losada&mdash;many called him Dictator&mdash;was a man whose genius
+would have made him conspicuous even among Anglo-Saxons, had not that genius
+been intermixed with other traits that were petty and subversive. He had some
+of the lofty patriotism of Washington (the man he most admired), the force of
+Napoleon, and much of the wisdom of the sages. These characteristics might have
+justified him in the assumption of the title of &ldquo;The Illustrious
+Liberator,&rdquo; had they not been accompanied by a stupendous and amazing
+vanity that kept him in the less worthy ranks of the dictators.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Yet he did his country great service. With a mighty grasp he shook it nearly
+free from the shackles of ignorance and sloth and the vermin that fed upon it,
+and all but made it a power in the council of nations. He established schools
+and hospitals, built roads, bridges, railroads and palaces, and bestowed
+generous subsidies upon the arts and sciences. He was the absolute despot and
+the idol of his people. The wealth of the country poured into his hands. Other
+presidents had been rapacious without reason. Losada amassed enormous wealth,
+but his people had their share of the benefits.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The joint in his armour was his insatiate passion for monuments and tokens
+commemorating his glory. In every town he caused to be erected statues of
+himself bearing legends in praise of his greatness. In the walls of every
+public edifice, tablets were fixed reciting his splendour and the gratitude of
+his subjects. His statuettes and portraits were scattered throughout the land
+in every house and hut. One of the sycophants in his court painted him as St.
+John, with a halo and a train of attendants in full uniform. Losada saw nothing
+incongruous in this picture, and had it hung in a church in the capital. He
+ordered from a French sculptor a marble group including himself with Napoleon,
+Alexander the Great, and one or two others whom he deemed worthy of the honour.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He ransacked Europe for decorations, employing policy, money and intrigue to
+cajole the orders he coveted from kings and rulers. On state occasions his
+breast was covered from shoulder to shoulder with crosses, stars, golden roses,
+medals and ribbons. It was said that the man who could contrive for him a new
+decoration, or invent some new method of extolling his greatness, might plunge
+a hand deep into the treasury.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This was the man upon whom Billy Keogh had his eye. The gentle buccaneer had
+observed the rain of favors that fell upon those who ministered to the
+president&rsquo;s vanities, and he did not deem it his duty to hoist his
+umbrella against the scattering drops of liquid fortune.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In a few weeks the new consul arrived, releasing Keogh from his temporary
+duties. He was a young man fresh from college, who lived for botany alone. The
+consulate at Coralio gave him the opportunity to study tropical flora. He wore
+smoked glasses, and carried a green umbrella. He filled the cool, back porch of
+the consulate with plants and specimens so that space for a bottle and chair
+was not to be found. Keogh gazed on him sadly, but without rancour, and began
+to pack his gripsack. For his new plot against stagnation along the Spanish
+Main required of him a voyage overseas.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Soon came the <i>Karlsefin</i> again&mdash;she of the trampish
+habits&mdash;gleaning a cargo of cocoanuts for a speculative descent upon the
+New York market. Keogh was booked for a passage on the return trip.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Yes, I&rsquo;m going to New York,&rdquo; he explained to the group of
+his countrymen that had gathered on the beach to see him off. &ldquo;But
+I&rsquo;ll be back before you miss me. I&rsquo;ve undertaken the art education
+of this piebald country, and I&rsquo;m not the man to desert it while
+it&rsquo;s in the early throes of tintypes.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+With this mysterious declaration of his intentions Keogh boarded the
+<i>Karlsefin</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Ten days later, shivering, with the collar of his thin coat turned high, he
+burst into the studio of Carolus White at the top of a tall building in Tenth
+Street, New York City.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carolus White was smoking a cigarette and frying sausages over an oil stove. He
+was only twenty-three, and had noble theories about art.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Billy Keogh!&rdquo; exclaimed White, extending the hand that was not
+busy with the frying pan. &ldquo;From what part of the uncivilized world, I
+wonder!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Hello, Carry,&rdquo; said Keogh, dragging forward a stool, and holding
+his fingers close to the stove. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m glad I found you so soon.
+I&rsquo;ve been looking for you all day in the directories and art galleries.
+The free-lunch man on the corner told me where you were, quick. I was sure
+you&rsquo;d be painting pictures yet.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh glanced about the studio with the shrewd eye of a connoisseur in
+business.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Yes, you can do it,&rdquo; he declared, with many gentle nods of his
+head. &ldquo;That big one in the corner with the angels and green clouds and
+band-wagon is just the sort of thing we want. What would you call that,
+Carry&mdash;scene from Coney Island, ain&rsquo;t it?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That,&rdquo; said White, &ldquo;I had intended to call &lsquo;The
+Translation of Elijah,&rsquo; but you may be nearer right than I am.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Name doesn&rsquo;t matter,&rdquo; said Keogh, largely; &ldquo;it&rsquo;s
+the frame and the varieties of paint that does the trick. Now, I can tell you
+in a minute what I want. I&rsquo;ve come on a little voyage of two thousand
+miles to take you in with me on a scheme. I thought of you as soon as the
+scheme showed itself to me. How would you like to go back with me and paint a
+picture? Ninety days for the trip, and five thousand dollars for the
+job.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Cereal food or hair-tonic posters?&rdquo; asked White.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It isn&rsquo;t an ad.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What kind of a picture is it to be?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It&rsquo;s a long story,&rdquo; said Keogh.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Go ahead with it. If you don&rsquo;t mind, while you talk I&rsquo;ll
+just keep my eye on these sausages. Let &rsquo;em get one shade deeper than a
+Vandyke brown and you spoil &rsquo;em.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh explained his project. They were to return to Coralio, where White was to
+pose as a distinguished American portrait painter who was touring in the
+tropics as a relaxation from his arduous and remunerative professional labours.
+It was not an unreasonable hope, even to those who had trod in the beaten paths
+of business, that an artist with so much prestige might secure a commission to
+perpetuate upon canvas the lineaments of the president, and secure a share of
+the <i>pesos</i> that were raining upon the caterers to his weaknesses.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh had set his price at ten thousand dollars. Artists had been paid more for
+portraits. He and White were to share the expenses of the trip, and divide the
+possible profits. Thus he laid the scheme before White, whom he had known in
+the West before one declared for Art and the other became a Bedouin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Before long the two machinators abandoned the rigour of the bare studio for a
+snug corner of a café. There they sat far into the night, with old envelopes
+and Keogh&rsquo;s stub of blue pencil between them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At twelve o&rsquo;clock White doubled up in his chair, with his chin on his
+fist, and shut his eyes at the unbeautiful wall-paper.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;ll go you, Billy,&rdquo; he said, in the quiet tones of
+decision. &ldquo;I&rsquo;ve got two or three hundred saved up for sausages and
+rent; and I&rsquo;ll take the chance with you. Five thousand! It will give me
+two years in Paris and one in Italy. I&rsquo;ll begin to pack to-morrow.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You&rsquo;ll begin in ten minutes,&rdquo; said Keogh. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s
+to-morrow now. The <i>Karlsefin</i> starts back at four P.M. Come on to your
+painting shop, and I&rsquo;ll help you.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For five months in the year Coralio is the Newport of Anchuria. Then only does
+the town possess life. From November to March it is practically the seat of
+government. The president with his official family sojourns there; and society
+follows him. The pleasure-loving people make the season one long holiday of
+amusement and rejoicing. <i>Fiestas</i>, balls, games, sea bathing, processions
+and small theatres contribute to their enjoyment. The famous Swiss band from
+the capital plays in the little plaza every evening, while the fourteen
+carriages and vehicles in the town circle in funereal but complacent
+procession. Indians from the interior mountains, looking like prehistoric stone
+idols, come down to peddle their handiwork in the streets. The people throng
+the narrow ways, a chattering, happy, careless stream of buoyant humanity.
+Preposterous children rigged out with the shortest of ballet skirts and gilt
+wings, howl, underfoot, among the effervescent crowds. Especially is the
+arrival of the presidential party, at the opening of the season, attended with
+pomp, show and patriotic demonstrations of enthusiasm and delight.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When Keogh and White reached their destination, on the return trip of the
+<i>Karlsefin</i>, the gay winter season was well begun. As they stepped upon
+the beach they could hear the band playing in the plaza. The village maidens,
+with fireflies already fixed in their dark locks, were gliding, barefoot and
+coy-eyed, along the paths. Dandies in white linen, swinging their canes, were
+beginning their seductive strolls. The air was full of human essence, of
+artificial enticement, of coquetry, indolence, pleasure&mdash;the man-made
+sense of existence.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first two or three days after their arrival were spent in preliminaries.
+Keogh escorted the artist about town, introducing him to the little circle of
+English-speaking residents and pulling whatever wires he could to effect the
+spreading of White&rsquo;s fame as a painter. And then Keogh planned a more
+spectacular demonstration of the idea he wished to keep before the public.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He and White engaged rooms in the Hotel de los Estranjeros. The two were clad
+in new suits of immaculate duck, with American straw hats, and carried canes of
+remarkable uniqueness and inutility. Few caballeros in Coralio&mdash;even the
+gorgeously uniformed officers of the Anchurian army&mdash;were as conspicuous
+for ease and elegance of demeanour as Keogh and his friend, the great American
+painter, Señor White.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+White set up his easel on the beach and made striking sketches of the mountain
+and sea views. The native population formed at his rear in a vast, chattering
+semicircle to watch his work. Keogh, with his care for details, had arranged
+for himself a pose which he carried out with fidelity. His rôle was that of
+friend to the great artist, a man of affairs and leisure. The visible emblem of
+his position was a pocket camera.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;For branding the man who owns it,&rdquo; said he, &ldquo;a genteel
+dilettante with a bank account and an easy conscience, a steam-yacht
+ain&rsquo;t in it with a camera. You see a man doing nothing but loafing around
+making snap-shots, and you know right away he reads up well in
+&lsquo;Bradstreet.&rsquo; You notice these old millionaire boys&mdash;soon as
+they get through taking everything else in sight they go to taking photographs.
+People are more impressed by a kodak than they are by a title or a four-carat
+scarf-pin.&rdquo; So Keogh strolled blandly about Coralio, snapping the scenery
+and the shrinking señoritas, while White posed conspicuously in the higher
+regions of art.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Two weeks after their arrival, the scheme began to bear fruit. An aide-de-camp
+of the president drove to the hotel in a dashing victoria. The president
+desired that Señor White come to the Casa Morena for an informal interview.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh gripped his pipe tightly between his teeth. &ldquo;Not a cent less than
+ten thousand,&rdquo; he said to the artist&mdash;&ldquo;remember the price. And
+in gold or its equivalent&mdash;don&rsquo;t let him stick you with this
+bargain-counter stuff they call money here.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Perhaps it isn&rsquo;t that he wants,&rdquo; said White.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Get out!&rdquo; said Keogh, with splendid confidence. &ldquo;I know what
+he wants. He wants his picture painted by the celebrated young American painter
+and filibuster now sojourning in his down-trodden country. Off you go.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The victoria sped away with the artist. Keogh walked up and down, puffing great
+clouds of smoke from his pipe, and waited. In an hour the victoria swept again
+to the door of the hotel, deposited White, and vanished. The artist dashed up
+the stairs, three at a step. Keogh stopped smoking, and became a silent
+interrogation point.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Landed,&rdquo; exclaimed White, with his boyish face flushed with
+elation. &ldquo;Billy, you are a wonder. He wants a picture. I&rsquo;ll tell
+you all about it. By Heavens! that dictator chap is a corker! He&rsquo;s a
+dictator clear down to his finger-ends. He&rsquo;s a kind of combination of
+Julius Cæsar, Lucifer and Chauncey Depew done in sepia. Polite and
+grim&mdash;that&rsquo;s his way. The room I saw him in was about ten acres big,
+and looked like a Mississippi steamboat with its gilding and mirrors and white
+paint. He talks English better than I can ever hope to. The matter of the price
+came up. I mentioned ten thousand. I expected him to call the guard and have me
+taken out and shot. He didn&rsquo;t move an eyelash. He just waved one of his
+chestnut hands in a careless way, and said, &lsquo;Whatever you say.&rsquo; I
+am to go back to-morrow and discuss with him the details of the picture.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh hung his head. Self-abasement was easy to read in his downcast
+countenance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;m failing, Carry,&rdquo; he said, sorrowfully. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m
+not fit to handle these man&rsquo;s-size schemes any longer. Peddling oranges
+in a push-cart is about the suitable graft for me. When I said ten thousand, I
+swear I thought I had sized up that brown man&rsquo;s limit to within two
+cents. He&rsquo;d have melted down for fifteen thousand just as easy.
+Say&mdash;Carry&mdash;you&rsquo;ll see old man Keogh safe in some nice, quiet
+idiot asylum, won&rsquo;t you, if he makes a break like that again?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Casa Morena, although only one story in height, was a building of brown
+stone, luxurious as a palace in its interior. It stood on a low hill in a
+walled garden of splendid tropical flora at the upper edge of Coralio. The next
+day the president&rsquo;s carriage came again for the artist. Keogh went out
+for a walk along the beach, where he and his &ldquo;picture box&rdquo; were now
+familiar sights. When he returned to the hotel White was sitting in a
+steamer-chair on the balcony.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well,&rdquo; said Keogh, &ldquo;did you and His Nibs decide on the kind
+of a chromo he wants?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+White got up and walked back and forth on the balcony a few times. Then he
+stopped, and laughed strangely. His face was flushed, and his eyes were bright
+with a kind of angry amusement.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Look here, Billy,&rdquo; he said, somewhat roughly, &ldquo;when you
+first came to me in my studio and mentioned a picture, I thought you wanted a
+Smashed Oats or a Hair Tonic poster painted on a range of mountains or the side
+of a continent. Well, either of those jobs would have been Art in its highest
+form compared to the one you&rsquo;ve steered me against. I can&rsquo;t paint
+that picture, Billy. You&rsquo;ve got to let me out. Let me try to tell you
+what that barbarian wants. He had it all planned out and even a sketch made of
+his idea. The old boy doesn&rsquo;t draw badly at all. But, ye goddesses of
+Art! listen to the monstrosity he expects me to paint. He wants himself in the
+centre of the canvas, of course. He is to be painted as Jupiter sitting on
+Olympus, with the clouds at his feet. At one side of him stands George
+Washington, in full regimentals, with his hand on the president&rsquo;s
+shoulder. An angel with outstretched wings hovers overhead, and is placing a
+laurel wreath on the president&rsquo;s head, crowning him&mdash;Queen of the
+May, I suppose. In the background is to be cannon, more angels and soldiers.
+The man who would paint that picture would have to have the soul of a dog, and
+would deserve to go down into oblivion without even a tin can tied to his tail
+to sound his memory.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Little beads of moisture crept out all over Billy Keogh&rsquo;s brow. The stub
+of his blue pencil had not figured out a contingency like this. The machinery
+of his plan had run with flattering smoothness until now. He dragged another
+chair upon the balcony, and got White back to his seat. He lit his pipe with
+apparent calm.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Now, sonny,&rdquo; he said, with gentle grimness, &ldquo;you and me will
+have an Art to Art talk. You&rsquo;ve got your art and I&rsquo;ve got mine.
+Yours is the real Pierian stuff that turns up its nose at bock-beer signs and
+oleographs of the Old Mill. Mine&rsquo;s the art of Business. This was my
+scheme, and it worked out like two-and-two. Paint that president man as Old
+King Cole, or Venus, or a landscape, or a fresco, or a bunch of lilies, or
+anything he thinks he looks like. But get the paint on the canvas and collect
+the spoils. You wouldn&rsquo;t throw me down, Carry, at this stage of the game.
+Think of that ten thousand.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I can&rsquo;t help thinking of it,&rdquo; said White, &ldquo;and
+that&rsquo;s what hurts. I&rsquo;m tempted to throw every ideal I ever had down
+in the mire, and steep my soul in infamy by painting that picture. That five
+thousand meant three years of foreign study to me, and I&rsquo;d almost sell my
+soul for that.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Now it ain&rsquo;t as bad as that,&rdquo; said Keogh, soothingly.
+&ldquo;It&rsquo;s a business proposition. It&rsquo;s so much paint and time
+against money. I don&rsquo;t fall in with your idea that that picture would so
+everlastingly jolt the art side of the question. George Washington was all
+right, you know, and nobody could say a word against the angel. I don&rsquo;t
+think so bad of that group. If you was to give Jupiter a pair of epaulets and a
+sword, and kind of work the clouds around to look like a blackberry patch, it
+wouldn&rsquo;t make such a bad battle scene. Why, if we hadn&rsquo;t already
+settled on the price, he ought to pay an extra thousand for Washington, and the
+angel ought to raise it five hundred.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You don&rsquo;t understand, Billy,&rdquo; said White, with an uneasy
+laugh. &ldquo;Some of us fellows who try to paint have big notions about Art. I
+wanted to paint a picture some day that people would stand before and forget
+that it was made of paint. I wanted it to creep into them like a bar of music
+and mushroom there like a soft bullet. And I wanted &rsquo;em to go away and
+ask, &lsquo;What else has he done?&rsquo; And I didn&rsquo;t want &rsquo;em to
+find a thing; not a portrait nor a magazine cover nor an illustration nor a
+drawing of a girl&mdash;nothing but <i>the</i> picture. That&rsquo;s why
+I&rsquo;ve lived on fried sausages, and tried to keep true to myself. I
+persuaded myself to do this portrait for the chance it might give me to study
+abroad. But this howling, screaming caricature! Good Lord! can&rsquo;t you see
+how it is?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Sure,&rdquo; said Keogh, as tenderly as he would have spoken to a child,
+and he laid a long forefinger on White&rsquo;s knee. &ldquo;I see. It&rsquo;s
+bad to have your art all slugged up like that. I know. You wanted to paint a
+big thing like the panorama of the battle of Gettysburg. But let me kalsomine
+you a little mental sketch to consider. Up to date we&rsquo;re out $385.50 on
+this scheme. Our capital took every cent both of us could raise. We&rsquo;ve
+got about enough left to get back to New York on. I need my share of that ten
+thousand. I want to work a copper deal in Idaho, and make a hundred thousand.
+That&rsquo;s the business end of the thing. Come down off your art perch,
+Carry, and let&rsquo;s land that hatful of dollars.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Billy,&rdquo; said White, with an effort, &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll try. I
+won&rsquo;t say I&rsquo;ll do it, but I&rsquo;ll try. I&rsquo;ll go at it, and
+put it through if I can.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;That&rsquo;s business,&rdquo; said Keogh heartily. &ldquo;Good boy! Now,
+here&rsquo;s another thing&mdash;rush that picture&mdash;crowd it through as
+quick as you can. Get a couple of boys to help you mix the paint if necessary.
+I&rsquo;ve picked up some pointers around town. The people here are beginning
+to get sick of Mr. President. They say he&rsquo;s been too free with
+concessions; and they accuse him of trying to make a dicker with England to
+sell out the country. We want that picture done and paid for before
+there&rsquo;s any row.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the great <i>patio</i> of Casa Morena, the president caused to be stretched
+a huge canvas. Under this White set up his temporary studio. For two hours each
+day the great man sat to him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+White worked faithfully. But, as the work progressed, he had seasons of bitter
+scorn, of infinite self-contempt, of sullen gloom and sardonic gaiety. Keogh,
+with the patience of a great general, soothed, coaxed, argued&mdash;kept him at
+the picture.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At the end of a month White announced that the picture was
+completed&mdash;Jupiter, Washington, angels, clouds, cannon and all. His face
+was pale and his mouth drawn straight when he told Keogh. He said the president
+was much pleased with it. It was to be hung in the National Gallery of
+Statesmen and Heroes. The artist had been requested to return to Casa Morena on
+the following day to receive payment. At the appointed time he left the hotel,
+silent under his friend&rsquo;s joyful talk of their success.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+An hour later he walked into the room where Keogh was waiting, threw his hat on
+the floor, and sat upon the table.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Billy,&rdquo; he said, in strained and labouring tones,
+&ldquo;I&rsquo;ve a little money out West in a small business that my brother
+is running. It&rsquo;s what I&rsquo;ve been living on while I&rsquo;ve been
+studying art. I&rsquo;ll draw out my share and pay you back what you&rsquo;ve
+lost on this scheme.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Lost!&rdquo; exclaimed Keogh, jumping up. &ldquo;Didn&rsquo;t you get
+paid for the picture?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Yes, I got paid,&rdquo; said White. &ldquo;But just now there
+isn&rsquo;t any picture, and there isn&rsquo;t any pay. If you care to hear
+about it, here are the edifying details. The president and I were looking at
+the painting. His secretary brought a bank draft on New York for ten thousand
+dollars and handed it to me. The moment I touched it I went wild. I tore it
+into little pieces and threw them on the floor. A workman was repainting the
+pillars inside the <i>patio</i>. A bucket of his paint happened to be
+convenient. I picked up his brush and slapped a quart of blue paint all over
+that ten-thousand-dollar nightmare. I bowed, and walked out. The president
+didn&rsquo;t move or speak. That was one time he was taken by surprise.
+It&rsquo;s tough on you, Billy, but I couldn&rsquo;t help it.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There seemed to be excitement in Coralio. Outside there was a confused, rising
+murmur pierced by high-pitched cries. &ldquo;<i>Bajo el traidor&mdash;Muerte el
+traidor!</i>&rdquo; were the words they seemed to form.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Listen to that!&rdquo; exclaimed White, bitterly: &ldquo;I know that
+much Spanish. They&rsquo;re shouting, &lsquo;Down with the traitor!&rsquo; I
+heard them before. I felt that they meant me. I was a traitor to Art. The
+picture had to go.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Down with the blank fool&rsquo; would have suited your case
+better,&rdquo; said Keogh, with fiery emphasis. &ldquo;You tear up ten thousand
+dollars like an old rag because the way you&rsquo;ve spread on five
+dollars&rsquo; worth of paint hurts your conscience. Next time I pick a
+side-partner in a scheme the man has got to go before a notary and swear he
+never even heard the word &lsquo;ideal&rsquo; mentioned.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh strode from the room, white-hot. White paid little attention to his
+resentment. The scorn of Billy Keogh seemed a trifling thing beside the greater
+self-scorn he had escaped.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In Coralio the excitement waxed. An outburst was imminent. The cause of this
+demonstration of displeasure was the presence in the town of a big,
+pink-cheeked Englishman, who, it was said, was an agent of his government come
+to clinch the bargain by which the president placed his people in the hands of
+a foreign power. It was charged that not only had he given away priceless
+concessions, but that the public debt was to be transferred into the hands of
+the English, and the custom-houses turned over to them as a guarantee. The
+long-enduring people had determined to make their protest felt.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On that night, in Coralio and in other towns, their ire found vent. Yelling
+mobs, mercurial but dangerous, roamed the streets. They overthrew the great
+bronze statue of the president that stood in the centre of the plaza, and
+hacked it to shapeless pieces. They tore from public buildings the tablets set
+there proclaiming the glory of the &ldquo;Illustrious Liberator.&rdquo; His
+pictures in the government offices were demolished. The mobs even attacked the
+Casa Morena, but were driven away by the military, which remained faithful to
+the executive. All the night terror reigned.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The greatness of Losada was shown by the fact that by noon the next day order
+was restored, and he was still absolute. He issued proclamations denying
+positively that any negotiations of any kind had been entered into with
+England. Sir Stafford Vaughn, the pink-cheeked Englishman, also declared in
+placards and in public print that his presence there had no international
+significance. He was a traveller without guile. In fact (so he stated), he had
+not even spoken with the president or been in his presence since his arrival.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+During this disturbance, White was preparing for his homeward voyage in the
+steamship that was to sail within two or three days. About noon, Keogh, the
+restless, took his camera out with the hope of speeding the lagging hours. The
+town was now as quiet as if peace had never departed from her perch on the
+red-tiled roofs.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+About the middle of the afternoon, Keogh hurried back to the hotel with
+something decidedly special in his air. He retired to the little room where he
+developed his pictures.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Later on he came out to White on the balcony, with a luminous, grim, predatory
+smile on his face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Do you know what that is?&rdquo; he asked, holding up a 4 &times; 5
+photograph mounted on cardboard.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Snap-shot of a señorita sitting in the sand&mdash;alliteration
+unintentional,&rdquo; guessed White, lazily.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Wrong,&rdquo; said Keogh with shining eyes. &ldquo;It&rsquo;s a
+slung-shot. It&rsquo;s a can of dynamite. It&rsquo;s a gold mine. It&rsquo;s a
+sight-draft on your president man for twenty thousand dollars&mdash;yes,
+sir&mdash;twenty thousand this time, and no spoiling the picture. No ethics of
+art in the way. Art! You with your smelly little tubes! I&rsquo;ve got you
+skinned to death with a kodak. Take a look at that.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+White took the picture in his hand, and gave a long whistle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Jove!&rdquo; he exclaimed, &ldquo;but wouldn&rsquo;t that stir up a row
+in town if you let it be seen. How in the world did you get it, Billy?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You know that high wall around the president man&rsquo;s back garden? I
+was up there trying to get a bird&rsquo;s-eye of the town. I happened to notice
+a chink in the wall where a stone and a lot of plaster had slid out. Thinks I,
+I&rsquo;ll take a peep through to see how Mr. President&rsquo;s cabbages are
+growing. The first thing I saw was him and this Sir Englishman sitting at a
+little table about twenty feet away. They had the table all spread over with
+documents, and they were hobnobbing over them as thick as two pirates.
+&rsquo;Twas a nice corner of the garden, all private and shady with palms and
+orange trees, and they had a pail of champagne set by handy in the grass. I
+knew then was the time for me to make my big hit in Art. So I raised the
+machine up to the crack, and pressed the button. Just as I did so them old boys
+shook hands on the deal&mdash;you see they took that way in the picture.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Keogh put on his coat and hat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;What are you going to do with it?&rdquo; asked White.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Me,&rdquo; said Keogh in a hurt tone, &ldquo;why, I&rsquo;m going to tie
+a pink ribbon to it and hang it on the what-not, of course. I&rsquo;m surprised
+at you. But while I&rsquo;m out you just try to figure out what ginger-cake
+potentate would be most likely to want to buy this work of art for his private
+collection&mdash;just to keep it out of circulation.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The sunset was reddening the tops of the cocoanut palms when Billy Keogh came
+back from Casa Morena. He nodded to the artist&rsquo;s questioning gaze; and
+lay down on a cot with his hands under the back of his head.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I saw him. He paid the money like a little man. They didn&rsquo;t want
+to let me in at first. I told &rsquo;em it was important. Yes, that president
+man is on the plenty-able list. He&rsquo;s got a beautiful business system
+about the way he uses his brains. All I had to do was to hold up the photograph
+so he could see it, and name the price. He just smiled, and walked over to a
+safe and got the cash. Twenty one-thousand-dollar brand-new United States
+Treasury notes he laid on the table, like I&rsquo;d pay out a dollar and a
+quarter. Fine notes, too&mdash;they crackled with a sound like burning the
+brush off a ten-acre lot.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Let&rsquo;s try the feel of one,&rdquo; said White, curiously. &ldquo;I
+never saw a thousand-dollar bill.&rdquo; Keogh did not immediately respond.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Carry,&rdquo; he said, in an absent-minded way, &ldquo;you think a heap
+of your art, don&rsquo;t you?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;More,&rdquo; said White, frankly, &ldquo;than has been for the financial
+good of myself and my friends.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I thought you were a fool the other day,&rdquo; went on Keogh, quietly,
+&ldquo;and I&rsquo;m not sure now that you wasn&rsquo;t. But if you was, so am
+I. I&rsquo;ve been in some funny deals, Carry, but I&rsquo;ve always managed to
+scramble fair, and match my brains and capital against the other
+fellow&rsquo;s. But when it comes to&mdash;well, when you&rsquo;ve got the
+other fellow cinched, and the screws on him, and he&rsquo;s got to put
+up&mdash;why, it don&rsquo;t strike me as being a man&rsquo;s game.
+They&rsquo;ve got a name for it, you know; it&rsquo;s&mdash;confound you,
+don&rsquo;t you understand? A fellow feels&mdash;it&rsquo;s something like that
+blamed art of yours&mdash;he&mdash;well, I tore that photograph up and laid the
+pieces on that stack of money and shoved the whole business back across the
+table. &lsquo;Excuse me, Mr. Losada,&rsquo; I said, &lsquo;but I guess
+I&rsquo;ve made a mistake in the price. You get the photo for nothing.&rsquo;
+Now, Carry, you get out the pencil, and we&rsquo;ll do some more figuring.
+I&rsquo;d like to save enough out of our capital for you to have some fried
+sausages in your joint when you get back to New York.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap15"></a>XV<br/>
+DICKY</h2>
+
+<p>
+There is little consecutiveness along the Spanish Main. Things happen there
+intermittently. Even Time seems to hang his scythe daily on the branch of an
+orange tree while he takes a siesta and a cigarette.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After the ineffectual revolt against the administration of President Losada,
+the country settled again into quiet toleration of the abuses with which he had
+been charged. In Coralio old political enemies went arm-in-arm, lightly
+eschewing for the time all differences of opinion.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The failure of the art expedition did not stretch the cat-footed Keogh upon his
+back. The ups and downs of Fortune made smooth travelling for his nimble steps.
+His blue pencil stub was at work again before the smoke of the steamer on which
+White sailed had cleared away from the horizon. He had but to speak a word to
+Geddie to find his credit negotiable for whatever goods he wanted from the
+store of Brannigan &amp; Company. On the same day on which White arrived in New
+York Keogh, at the rear of a train of five pack mules loaded with hardware and
+cutlery, set his face toward the grim, interior mountains. There the Indian
+tribes wash gold dust from the auriferous streams; and when a market is brought
+to them trading is brisk and <i>muy bueno</i> in the Cordilleras.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In Coralio Time folded his wings and paced wearily along his drowsy path. They
+who had most cheered the torpid hours were gone. Clancy had sailed on a Spanish
+barque for Colon, contemplating a cut across the isthmus and then a further
+voyage to end at Calao, where the fighting was said to be on. Geddie, whose
+quiet and genial nature had once served to mitigate the frequent dull reaction
+of lotus eating, was now a home-man, happy with his bright orchid, Paula, and
+never even dreaming of or regretting the unsolved, sealed and monogramed Bottle
+whose contents, now inconsiderable, were held safely in the keeping of the sea.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Well may the Walrus, most discerning and eclectic of beasts, place sealing-wax
+midway on his programme of topics that fall pertinent and diverting upon the
+ear.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Atwood was gone&mdash;he of the hospitable back porch and ingenuous cunning.
+Dr. Gregg, with his trepanning story smouldering within him, was a whiskered
+volcano, always showing signs of imminent eruption, and was not to be
+considered in the ranks of those who might contribute to the amelioration of
+ennui. The new consul&rsquo;s note chimed with the sad sea waves and the
+violent tropical greens&mdash;he had not a bar of Scheherezade or of the Round
+Table in his lute. Goodwin was employed with large projects: what time he was
+loosed from them found him at his home, where he loved to be. Therefore it will
+be seen that there was a dearth of fellowship and entertainment among the
+foreign contingent of Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And then Dicky Maloney dropped down from the clouds upon the town, and amused
+it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Nobody knew where Dicky Maloney hailed from or how he reached Coralio. He
+appeared there one day; and that was all. He afterward said that he came on the
+fruit steamer <i>Thor</i>; but an inspection of the <i>Thor&rsquo;s</i>
+passenger list of that date was found to be Maloneyless. Curiosity, however,
+soon perished; and Dicky took his place among the odd fish cast up by the
+Caribbean.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was an active, devil-may-care, rollicking fellow with an engaging gray eye,
+the most irresistible grin, a rather dark or much sunburned complexion, and a
+head of the fieriest red hair ever seen in that country. Speaking the Spanish
+language as well as he spoke English, and seeming always to have plenty of
+silver in his pockets, it was not long before he was a welcome companion
+whithersoever he went. He had an extreme fondness for <i>vino blanco</i>, and
+gained the reputation of being able to drink more of it than any three men in
+town. Everybody called him &ldquo;Dicky&rdquo;; everybody cheered up at the
+sight of him&mdash;especially the natives, to whom his marvellous red hair and
+his free-and-easy style were a constant delight and envy. Wherever you went in
+the town you would soon see Dicky or hear his genial laugh, and find around him
+a group of admirers who appreciated him both for his good nature and the white
+wine he was always so ready to buy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A considerable amount of speculation was had concerning the object of his
+sojourn there, until one day he silenced this by opening a small shop for the
+sale of tobacco, <i>dulces</i> and the handiwork of the interior
+Indians&mdash;fibre-and-silk-woven goods, deerskin <i>zapatos</i> and
+basketwork of <i>tule</i> reeds. Even then he did not change his habits; for he
+was drinking and playing cards half the day and night with the
+<i>comandante</i>, the collector of customs, the <i>Jefe Politico</i> and other
+gay dogs among the native officials.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One day Dicky saw Pasa, the daughter of Madama Ortiz, sitting in the side-door
+of the Hotel de los Estranjeros. He stopped in his tracks, still, for the first
+time in Coralio; and then he sped, swift as a deer, to find Vasquez, a gilded
+native youth, to present him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The young men had named Pasa &ldquo;<i>La Santita Naranjadita</i>.&rdquo;
+<i>Naranjadita</i> is a Spanish word for a certain colour that you must go to
+more trouble to describe in English. By saying &ldquo;The little saint, tinted
+the most beautiful-delicate-slightly-orange-golden,&rdquo; you will approximate
+the description of Madama Ortiz&rsquo;s daughter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+La Madama Ortiz sold rum in addition to other liquors. Now, you must know that
+the rum expiates whatever opprobrium attends upon the other commodities. For
+rum-making, mind you, is a government monopoly; and to keep a government
+dispensary assures respectability if not preëminence. Moreover, the saddest of
+precisians could find no fault with the conduct of the shop. Customers drank
+there in the lowest of spirits and fearsomely, as in the shadow of the dead;
+for Madama&rsquo;s ancient and vaunted lineage counteracted even the
+rum&rsquo;s behest to be merry. For, was she not of the Iglesias, who landed
+with Pizarro? And had not her deceased husband been <i>comisionado de caminos y
+puentes</i> for the district?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the evenings Pasa sat by the window in the room next to the one where they
+drank, and strummed dreamily upon her guitar. And then, by twos and threes,
+would come visiting young caballeros and occupy the prim line of chairs set
+against the wall of this room. They were there to besiege the heart of
+&ldquo;<i>La Santita</i>.&rdquo; Their method (which is not proof against
+intelligent competition) consisted of expanding the chest, looking valorous,
+and consuming a gross or two of cigarettes. Even saints delicately oranged
+prefer to be wooed differently.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Doña Pasa would tide over the vast chasms of nicotinized silence with music
+from her guitar, while she wondered if the romances she had read about gallant
+and more&mdash;more contiguous cavaliers were all lies. At somewhat regular
+intervals Madama would glide in from the dispensary with a sort of
+drought-suggesting gleam in her eye, and there would be a rustling of
+stiffly-starched white trousers as one of the caballeros would propose an
+adjournment to the bar.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+That Dicky Maloney would, sooner or later, explore this field was a thing to be
+foreseen. There were few doors in Coralio into which his red head had not been
+poked.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In an incredibly short space of time after his first sight of her he was there,
+seated close beside her rocking chair. There were no back-against-the-wall
+poses in Dicky&rsquo;s theory of wooing. His plan of subjection was an attack
+at close range. To carry the fortress with one concentrated, ardent, eloquent,
+irresistible <i>escalade</i>&mdash;that was Dicky&rsquo;s way.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Pasa was descended from the proudest Spanish families in the country. Moreover,
+she had had unusual advantages. Two years in a New Orleans school had elevated
+her ambitions and fitted her for a fate above the ordinary maidens of her
+native land. And yet here she succumbed to the first red-haired scamp with a
+glib tongue and a charming smile that came along and courted her properly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Very soon Dicky took her to the little church on the corner of the plaza, and
+&ldquo;Mrs. Maloney&rdquo; was added to her string of distinguished names.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And it was her fate to sit, with her patient, saintly eyes and figure like a
+bisque Psyche, behind the sequestered counter of the little shop, while Dicky
+drank and philandered with his frivolous acquaintances.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The women, with their naturally fine instinct, saw a chance for vivisection,
+and delicately taunted her with his habits. She turned upon them in a
+beautiful, steady blaze of sorrowful contempt.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;You meat-cows,&rdquo; she said, in her level, crystal-clear tones;
+&ldquo;you know nothing of a man. Your men are <i>maromeros</i>. They are fit
+only to roll cigarettes in the shade until the sun strikes and shrivels them
+up. They drone in your hammocks and you comb their hair and feed them with
+fresh fruit. My man is of no such blood. Let him drink of the wine. When he has
+taken sufficient of it to drown one of your <i>flaccitos</i> he will come home
+to me more of a man than one thousand of your <i>pobrecitos</i>. <i>My</i> hair
+he smooths and braids; to me he sings; he himself removes my <i>zapatos</i>,
+and there, there, upon each instep leaves a kiss. He holds&mdash; Oh, you will
+never understand! Blind ones who have never known a <i>man</i>.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Sometimes mysterious things happened at night about Dicky&rsquo;s shop. While
+the front of it was dark, in the little room back of it Dicky and a few of his
+friends would sit about a table carrying on some kind of very quiet
+<i>negocios</i> until quite late. Finally he would let them out the front door
+very carefully, and go upstairs to his little saint. These visitors were
+generally conspirator-like men with dark clothes and hats. Of course, these
+dark doings were noticed after a while, and talked about.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky seemed to care nothing at all for the society of the alien residents of
+the town. He avoided Goodwin, and his skilful escape from the trepanning story
+of Dr. Gregg is still referred to, in Coralio, as a masterpiece of lightning
+diplomacy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Many letters arrived, addressed to &ldquo;Mr. Dicky Maloney,&rdquo; or
+&ldquo;Señor Dickee Maloney,&rdquo; to the considerable pride of Pasa. That so
+many people should desire to write to him only confirmed her own suspicion that
+the light from his red head shone around the world. As to their contents she
+never felt curiosity. There was a wife for you!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The one mistake Dicky made in Coralio was to run out of money at the wrong
+time. Where his money came from was a puzzle, for the sales of his shop were
+next to nothing, but that source failed, and at a peculiarly unfortunate time.
+It was when the <i>comandante</i>, Don Señor el Coronel Encarnación Rios,
+looked upon the little saint seated in the shop and felt his heart go pitapat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The <i>comandante</i>, who was versed in all the intricate arts of gallantry,
+first delicately hinted at his sentiments by donning his dress uniform and
+strutting up and down fiercely before her window. Pasa, glancing demurely with
+her saintly eyes, instantly perceived his resemblance to her parrot, Chichi,
+and was diverted to the extent of a smile. The <i>comandante</i> saw the smile,
+which was not intended for him. Convinced of an impression made, he entered the
+shop, confidently, and advanced to open compliment. Pasa froze; he pranced; she
+flamed royally; he was charmed to injudicious persistence; she commanded him to
+leave the shop; he tried to capture her hand,&mdash;and Dicky entered, smiling
+broadly, full of white wine and the devil.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He spent five minutes in punishing the <i>comandante</i> scientifically and
+carefully, so that the pain might be prolonged as far as possible. At the end
+of that time he pitched the rash wooer out the door upon the stones of the
+street, senseless.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A barefooted policeman who had been watching the affair from across the street
+blew a whistle. A squad of four soldiers came running from the <i>cuartel</i>
+around the corner. When they saw that the offender was Dicky, they stopped, and
+blew more whistles, which brought out reënforcements of eight. Deeming the odds
+against them sufficiently reduced, the military advanced upon the disturber.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky, being thoroughly imbued with the martial spirit, stooped and drew the
+<i>comandante&rsquo;s</i> sword, which was girded about him, and charged his
+foe. He chased the standing army four squares, playfully prodding its squealing
+rear and hacking at its ginger-coloured heels.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But he was not so successful with the civic authorities. Six muscular, nimble
+policemen overpowered him and conveyed him, triumphantly but warily, to jail.
+&ldquo;<i>El Diablo Colorado</i>&rdquo; they dubbed him, and derided the
+military for its defeat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky, with the rest of the prisoners, could look out through the barred door
+at the grass of the little plaza, at a row of orange trees and the red tile
+roofs and &rsquo;dobe walls of a line of insignificant stores.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At sunset along a path across this plaza came a melancholy procession of
+sad-faced women bearing plantains, cassaba, bread and fruit&mdash;each coming
+with food to some wretch behind those bars to whom she still clung and
+furnished the means of life. Twice a day&mdash;morning and evening&mdash;they
+were permitted to come. Water was furnished to her compulsory guests by the
+republic, but no food.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+That evening Dicky&rsquo;s name was called by the sentry, and he stepped before
+the bars of the door. There stood his little saint, a black mantilla draped
+about her head and shoulders, her face like glorified melancholy, her clear
+eyes gazing longingly at him as if they might draw him between the bars to her.
+She brought a chicken, some oranges, <i>dulces</i> and a loaf of white bread. A
+soldier inspected the food, and passed it in to Dicky. Pasa spoke calmly, as
+she always did, briefly, in her thrilling, flute-like tones. &ldquo;Angel of my
+life,&rdquo; she said, &ldquo;let it not be long that thou art away from me.
+Thou knowest that life is not a thing to be endured with thou not at my side.
+Tell me if I can do aught in this matter. If not, I will wait&mdash;a little
+while. I come again in the morning.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky, with his shoes removed so as not to disturb his fellow prisoners,
+tramped the floor of the jail half the night condemning his lack of money and
+the cause of it&mdash;whatever that might have been. He knew very well that
+money would have bought his release at once.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For two days succeeding Pasa came at the appointed times and brought him food.
+He eagerly inquired each time if a letter or package had come for him, and she
+mournfully shook her head.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On the morning of the third day she brought only a small loaf of bread. There
+were dark circles under her eyes. She seemed as calm as ever.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;By jingo,&rdquo; said Dicky, who seemed to speak in English or Spanish
+as the whim seized him, &ldquo;this is dry provender, <i>muchachita</i>. Is
+this the best you can dig up for a fellow?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Pasa looked at him as a mother looks at a beloved but capricious babe.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Think better of it,&rdquo; she said, in a low voice; &ldquo;since for
+the next meal there will be nothing. The last <i>centavo</i> is spent.&rdquo;
+She pressed closer against the grating.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Sell the goods in the shop&mdash;take anything for them.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Have I not tried? Did I not offer them for one-tenth their cost? Not
+even one <i>peso</i> would any one give. There is not one <i>real</i> in this
+town to assist Dickee Malonee.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dick clenched his teeth grimly. &ldquo;That&rsquo;s the
+<i>comandante</i>,&rdquo; he growled. &ldquo;He&rsquo;s responsible for that
+sentiment. Wait, oh, wait till the cards are all out.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Pasa lowered her voice to almost a whisper. &ldquo;And, listen, heart of my
+heart,&rdquo; she said, &ldquo;I have endeavoured to be brave, but I cannot
+live without thee. Three days now&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky caught a faint gleam of steel from the folds of her mantilla. For once
+she looked in his face and saw it without a smile, stern, menacing and
+purposeful. Then he suddenly raised his hand and his smile came back like a
+gleam of sunshine. The hoarse signal of an incoming steamer&rsquo;s siren
+sounded in the harbour. Dicky called to the sentry who was pacing before the
+door: &ldquo;What steamer comes?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The <i>Catarina</i>.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Of the Vesuvius line?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Without doubt, of that line.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Go you, <i>picarilla</i>,&rdquo; said Dicky joyously to Pasa, &ldquo;to
+the American consul. Tell him I wish to speak with him. See that he comes at
+once. And look you! let me see a different look in those eyes, for I promise
+your head shall rest upon this arm to-night.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was an hour before the consul came. He held his green umbrella under his
+arm, and mopped his forehead impatiently.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Now, see here, Maloney,&rdquo; he began, captiously, &ldquo;you fellows
+seem to think you can cut up any kind of row, and expect me to pull you out of
+it. I&rsquo;m neither the War Department nor a gold mine. This country has its
+laws, you know, and there&rsquo;s one against pounding the senses out of the
+regular army. You Irish are forever getting into trouble. I don&rsquo;t see
+what I can do. Anything like tobacco, now, to make you comfortable&mdash;or
+newspapers&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Son of Eli,&rdquo; interrupted Dicky, gravely, &ldquo;you haven&rsquo;t
+changed an iota. That is almost a duplicate of the speech you made when old
+Koen&rsquo;s donkeys and geese got into the chapel loft, and the culprits
+wanted to hide in your room.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Oh, heavens!&rdquo; exclaimed the consul, hurriedly adjusting his
+spectacles. &ldquo;Are you a Yale man, too? Were you in that crowd? I
+don&rsquo;t seem to remember any one with red&mdash;any one named Maloney. Such
+a lot of college men seem to have misused their advantages. One of the best
+mathematicians of the class of &rsquo;91 is selling lottery tickets in Belize.
+A Cornell man dropped off here last month. He was second steward on a guano
+boat. I&rsquo;ll write to the department if you like, Maloney. Or if
+there&rsquo;s any tobacco, or newspa&mdash;&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;There&rsquo;s nothing,&rdquo; interrupted Dicky, shortly, &ldquo;but
+this. You go tell the captain of the <i>Catarina</i> that Dicky Maloney wants
+to see him as soon as he can conveniently come. Tell him where I am. Hurry.
+That&rsquo;s all.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The consul, glad to be let off so easily, hurried away. The captain of the
+<i>Catarina</i>, a stout man, Sicilian born, soon appeared, shoving, with
+little ceremony, through the guards to the jail door. The Vesuvius Fruit
+Company had a habit of doing things that way in Anchuria.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I am exceedingly sorry&mdash;exceedingly sorry,&rdquo; said the captain,
+&ldquo;to see this occur. I place myself at your service, Mr. Maloney. What you
+need shall be furnished. Whatever you say shall be done.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky looked at him unsmilingly. His red hair could not detract from his
+attitude of severe dignity as he stood, tall and calm, with his now grim mouth
+forming a horizontal line.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Captain De Lucco, I believe I still have funds in the hands of your
+company&mdash;ample and personal funds. I ordered a remittance last week. The
+money has not arrived. You know what is needed in this game. Money and money
+and more money. Why has it not been sent?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;By the <i>Cristobal</i>,&rdquo; replied De Lucco, gesticulating,
+&ldquo;it was despatched. Where is the <i>Cristobal</i>? Off Cape Antonio I
+spoke her with a broken shaft. A tramp coaster was towing her back to New
+Orleans. I brought money ashore thinking your need for it might not withstand
+delay. In this envelope is one thousand dollars. There is more if you need it,
+Mr. Maloney.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;For the present it will suffice,&rdquo; said Dicky, softening as he
+crinkled the envelope and looked down at the half-inch thickness of smooth,
+dingy bills.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The long green!&rdquo; he said, gently, with a new reverence in his
+gaze. &ldquo;Is there anything it will not buy, Captain?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I had three friends,&rdquo; replied De Lucco, who was a bit of a
+philosopher, &ldquo;who had money. One of them speculated in stocks and made
+ten million; another is in heaven, and the third married a poor girl whom he
+loved.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The answer, then,&rdquo; said Dicky, &ldquo;is held by the Almighty,
+Wall Street and Cupid. So, the question remains.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;This,&rdquo; queried the captain, including Dicky&rsquo;s surroundings
+in a significant gesture of his hand, &ldquo;is it&mdash;it is not&mdash;it is
+not connected with the business of your little shop? There is no failure in
+your plans?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;No, no,&rdquo; said Dicky. &ldquo;This is merely the result of a little
+private affair of mine, a digression from the regular line of business. They
+say for a complete life a man must know poverty, love and war. But they
+don&rsquo;t go well together, <i>capitán mio</i>. No; there is no failure in my
+business. The little shop is doing very well.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the captain had departed Dicky called the sergeant of the jail squad and
+asked:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Am I <i>preso</i> by the military or by the civil authority?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Surely there is no martial law in effect now, señor.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Bueno</i>. Now go or send to the alcalde, the <i>Jues de la Paz</i>
+and the <i>Jefe de los Policios</i>. Tell them I am prepared at once to satisfy
+the demands of justice.&rdquo; A folded bill of the &ldquo;long green&rdquo;
+slid into the sergeant&rsquo;s hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then Dicky&rsquo;s smile came back again, for he knew that the hours of his
+captivity were numbered; and he hummed, in time with the sentry&rsquo;s tread:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+&ldquo;They&rsquo;re hanging men and women now,<br/>
+    For lacking of the green.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So, that night Dicky sat by the window of the room over his shop and his little
+saint sat close by, working at something silken and dainty. Dicky was
+thoughtful and grave. His red hair was in an unusual state of disorder.
+Pasa&rsquo;s fingers often ached to smooth and arrange it, but Dicky would
+never allow it. He was poring, to-night, over a great litter of maps and books
+and papers on his table until that perpendicular line came between his brows
+that always distressed Pasa. Presently she went and brought his hat, and stood
+with it until he looked up, inquiringly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It is sad for you here,&rdquo; she explained. &ldquo;Go out and drink
+<i>vino blanco</i>. Come back when you get that smile you used to wear. That is
+what I wish to see.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky laughed and threw down his papers. &ldquo;The <i>vino blanco</i> stage is
+past. It has served its turn. Perhaps, after all, there was less entered my
+mouth and more my ears than people thought. But, there will be no more maps or
+frowns to-night. I promise you that. Come.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They sat upon a reed <i>silleta</i> at the window and watched the quivering
+gleams from the lights of the <i>Catarina</i> reflected in the harbour.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Presently Pasa rippled out one of her infrequent chirrups of audible laughter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I was thinking,&rdquo; she began, anticipating Dicky&rsquo;s question,
+&ldquo;of the foolish things girls have in their minds. Because I went to
+school in the States I used to have ambitions. Nothing less than to be the
+president&rsquo;s wife would satisfy me. And, look, thou red picaroon, to what
+obscure fate thou hast stolen me!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Don&rsquo;t give up hope,&rdquo; said Dicky, smiling. &ldquo;More than
+one Irishman has been the ruler of a South American country. There was a
+dictator of Chili named O&rsquo;Higgins. Why not a President Maloney, of
+Anchuria? Say the word, <i>santita mia</i>, and we&rsquo;ll make the
+race.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;No, no, no, thou red-haired, reckless one!&rdquo; sighed Pasa; &ldquo;I
+am content&rdquo;&mdash;she laid her head against his
+arm&mdash;&ldquo;here.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap16"></a>XVI<br/>
+ROUGE ET NOIR</h2>
+
+<p>
+It has been indicated that disaffection followed the elevation of Losada to the
+presidency. This feeling continued to grow. Throughout the entire republic
+there seemed to be a spirit of silent, sullen discontent. Even the old Liberal
+party to which Goodwin, Zavalla and other patriots had lent their aid was
+disappointed. Losada had failed to become a popular idol. Fresh taxes, fresh
+import duties and, more than all, his tolerance of the outrageous oppression of
+citizens by the military had rendered him the most obnoxious president since
+the despicable Alforan. The majority of his own cabinet were out of sympathy
+with him. The army, which he had courted by giving it license to tyrannize, had
+been his main, and thus far adequate support.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But the most impolitic of the administration&rsquo;s moves had been when it
+antagonized the Vesuvius Fruit Company, an organization plying twelve steamers
+and with a cash capital somewhat larger than Anchuria&rsquo;s surplus and debt
+combined.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Reasonably an established concern like the Vesuvius would become irritated at
+having a small, retail republic with no rating at all attempt to squeeze it. So
+when the government proxies applied for a subsidy they encountered a polite
+refusal. The president at once retaliated by clapping an export duty of one
+<i>real</i> per bunch on bananas&mdash;a thing unprecedented in fruit-growing
+countries. The Vesuvius Company had invested large sums in wharves and
+plantations along the Anchurian coast, their agents had erected fine homes in
+the towns where they had their headquarters, and heretofore had worked with the
+republic in good-will and with advantage to both. It would lose an immense sum
+if compelled to move out. The selling price of bananas from Vera Cruz to
+Trinidad was three <i>reals</i> per bunch. This new duty of one <i>real</i>
+would have ruined the fruit growers in Anchuria and have seriously discommoded
+the Vesuvius Company had it declined to pay it. But for some reason, the
+Vesuvius continued to buy Anchurian fruit, paying four <i>reals</i> for it; and
+not suffering the growers to bear the loss.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This apparent victory deceived His Excellency; and he began to hunger for more
+of it. He sent an emissary to request a conference with a representative of the
+fruit company. The Vesuvius sent Mr. Franzoni, a little, stout, cheerful man,
+always cool, and whistling airs from Verdi&rsquo;s operas. Señor Espirition, of
+the office of the Minister of Finance, attempted the sandbagging in behalf of
+Anchuria. The meeting took place in the cabin of the <i>Salvador</i>, of the
+Vesuvius line.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Señor Espirition opened negotiations by announcing that the government
+contemplated the building of a railroad to skirt the alluvial coast lands.
+After touching upon the benefits such a road would confer upon the interests of
+the Vesuvius, he reached the definite suggestion that a contribution to the
+road&rsquo;s expenses of, say, fifty thousand <i>pesos</i> would not be more
+than an equivalent to benefits received.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Franzoni denied that his company would receive any benefits from a
+contemplated road. As its representative he must decline to contribute fifty
+thousand <i>pesos</i>. But he would assume the responsibility of offering
+twenty-five.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Did Señor Espirition understand Señor Franzoni to mean twenty-five thousand
+<i>pesos</i>?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By no means. Twenty-five <i>pesos</i>. And in silver; not in gold.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Your offer insults my government,&rdquo; cried Señor Espirition, rising
+with indignation.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Then,&rdquo; said Mr. Franzoni, in warning tone, &ldquo;<i>we will
+change it</i>.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The offer was never changed. Could Mr. Franzoni have meant the government?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This was the state of affairs in Anchuria when the winter season opened at
+Coralio at the end of the second year of Losada&rsquo;s administration. So,
+when the government and society made its annual exodus to the seashore it was
+evident that the presidential advent would not be celebrated by unlimited
+rejoicing. The tenth of November was the day set for the entrance into Coralio
+of the gay company from the capital. A narrow-gauge railroad runs twenty miles
+into the interior from Solitas. The government party travels by carriage from
+San Mateo to this road&rsquo;s terminal point, and proceeds by train to
+Solitas. From here they march in grand procession to Coralio where, on the day
+of their coming, festivities and ceremonies abound. But this season saw an
+ominous dawning of the tenth of November.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Although the rainy season was over, the day seemed to hark back to reeking
+June. A fine drizzle of rain fell all during the forenoon. The procession
+entered Coralio amid a strange silence.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+President Losada was an elderly man, grizzly bearded, with a considerable ratio
+of Indian blood revealed in his cinnamon complexion. His carriage headed the
+procession, surrounded and guarded by Captain Cruz and his famous troop of one
+hundred light horse &ldquo;<i>El Ciento Huilando</i>.&rdquo; Colonel Rocas
+followed, with a regiment of the regular army.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The president&rsquo;s sharp, beady eyes glanced about him for the expected
+demonstration of welcome; but he faced a stolid, indifferent array of citizens.
+Sight-seers the Anchurians are by birth and habit, and they turned out to their
+last able-bodied unit to witness the scene; but they maintained an accusive
+silence. They crowded the streets to the very wheel ruts; they covered the red
+tile roofs to the eaves, but there was never a &ldquo;<i>viva</i>&rdquo; from
+them. No wreaths of palm and lemon branches or gorgeous strings of paper roses
+hung from the windows and balconies as was the custom. There was an apathy, a
+dull, dissenting disapprobation, that was the more ominous because it puzzled.
+No one feared an outburst, a revolt of the discontents, for they had no leader.
+The president and those loyal to him had never even heard whispered a name
+among them capable of crystallizing the dissatisfaction into opposition. No,
+there could be no danger. The people always procured a new idol before they
+destroyed an old one.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At length, after a prodigious galloping and curvetting of red-sashed majors,
+gold-laced colonels and epauletted generals, the procession formed for its
+annual progress down the Calle Grande to the Casa Morena, where the ceremony of
+welcome to the visiting president always took place.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Swiss band led the line of march. After it pranced the local
+<i>comandante</i>, mounted, and a detachment of his troops. Next came a
+carriage with four members of the cabinet, conspicuous among them the Minister
+of War, old General Pilar, with his white moustache and his soldierly bearing.
+Then the president&rsquo;s vehicle, containing also the Ministers of Finance
+and State; and surrounded by Captain Cruz&rsquo;s light horse formed in a close
+double file of fours. Following them, the rest of the officials of state, the
+judges and distinguished military and social ornaments of public and private
+life.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As the band struck up, and the movement began, like a bird of ill-omen the
+<i>Valhalla</i>, the swiftest steamship of the Vesuvius line, glided into the
+harbour in plain view of the president and his train. Of course, there was
+nothing menacing about its arrival&mdash;a business firm does not go to war
+with a nation&mdash;but it reminded Señor Espirition and others in those
+carriages that the Vesuvius Fruit Company was undoubtedly carrying something up
+its sleeve for them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By the time the van of the procession had reached the government building,
+Captain Cronin, of the <i>Valhalla</i>, and Mr. Vincenti, member of the
+Vesuvius Company, had landed and were pushing their way, bluff, hearty and
+nonchalant, through the crowd on the narrow sidewalk. Clad in white linen, big,
+debonair, with an air of good-humoured authority, they made conspicuous figures
+among the dark mass of unimposing Anchurians, as they penetrated to within a
+few yards of the steps of the Casa Morena. Looking easily above the heads of
+the crowd, they perceived another that towered above the undersized natives. It
+was the fiery poll of Dicky Maloney against the wall close by the lower step;
+and his broad, seductive grin showed that he recognized their presence.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dicky had attired himself becomingly for the festive occasion in a well-fitting
+black suit. Pasa was close by his side, her head covered with the ubiquitous
+black mantilla.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Vincenti looked at her attentively.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Botticelli&rsquo;s Madonna,&rdquo; he remarked, gravely. &ldquo;I wonder
+when she got into the game. I don&rsquo;t like his getting tangled with the
+women. I hoped he would keep away from them.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Captain Cronin&rsquo;s laugh almost drew attention from the parade.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;With that head of hair! Keep away from the women! And a Maloney!
+Hasn&rsquo;t he got a license? But, nonsense aside, what do you think of the
+prospects? It&rsquo;s a species of filibustering out of my line.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Vincenti glanced again at Dicky&rsquo;s head and smiled.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Rouge et noir</i>,&rdquo; he said. &ldquo;There you have it. Make
+your play, gentlemen. Our money is on the red.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The lad&rsquo;s game,&rdquo; said Cronin, with a commending look at the
+tall, easy figure by the steps. &ldquo;But &rsquo;tis all like fly-by-night
+theatricals to me. The talk&rsquo;s bigger than the stage; there&rsquo;s a
+smell of gasoline in the air, and they&rsquo;re their own audience and
+scene-shifters.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They ceased talking, for General Pilar had descended from the first carriage
+and had taken his stand upon the top step of Casa Morena. As the oldest member
+of the cabinet, custom had decreed that he should make the address of welcome,
+presenting the keys of the official residence to the president at its close.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+General Pilar was one of the most distinguished citizens of the republic. Hero
+of three wars and innumerable revolutions, he was an honoured guest at European
+courts and camps. An eloquent speaker and a friend to the people, he
+represented the highest type of the Anchurians.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Holding in his hand the gilt keys of Casa Morena, he began his address in a
+historical form, touching upon each administration and the advance of
+civilization and prosperity from the first dim striving after liberty down to
+present times. Arriving at the régime of President Losada, at which point,
+according to precedent, he should have delivered a eulogy upon its wise conduct
+and the happiness of the people, General Pilar paused. Then he silently held up
+the bunch of keys high above his head, with his eyes closely regarding it. The
+ribbon with which they were bound fluttered in the breeze.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It still blows,&rdquo; cried the speaker, exultantly. &ldquo;Citizens of
+Anchuria, give thanks to the saints this night that our air is still
+free.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Thus disposing of Losada&rsquo;s administration, he abruptly reverted to that
+of Olivarra, Anchuria&rsquo;s most popular ruler. Olivarra had been
+assassinated nine years before while in the prime of life and usefulness. A
+faction of the Liberal party led by Losada himself had been accused of the
+deed. Whether guilty or not, it was eight years before the ambitious and
+scheming Losada had gained his goal.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Upon this theme General Pilar&rsquo;s eloquence was loosed. He drew the picture
+of the beneficent Olivarra with a loving hand. He reminded the people of the
+peace, the security and the happiness they had enjoyed during that period. He
+recalled in vivid detail and with significant contrast the last winter sojourn
+of President Olivarra in Coralio, when his appearance at their fiestas was the
+signal for thundering <i>vivas</i> of love and approbation.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first public expression of sentiment from the people that day followed. A
+low, sustained murmur went among them like the surf rolling along the shore.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Ten dollars to a dinner at the Saint Charles,&rdquo; remarked Mr.
+Vincenti, &ldquo;that <i>rouge</i> wins.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I never bet against my own interests,&rdquo; said Captain Cronin,
+lighting a cigar. &ldquo;Long-winded old boy, for his age. What&rsquo;s he
+talking about?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;My Spanish,&rdquo; replied Vincenti, &ldquo;runs about ten words to the
+minute; his is something around two hundred. Whatever he&rsquo;s saying,
+he&rsquo;s getting them warmed up.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Friends and brothers,&rdquo; General Pilar was saying, &ldquo;could I
+reach out my hand this day across the lamentable silence of the grave to
+Olivarra &lsquo;the Good,&rsquo; to the ruler who was one of you, whose tears
+fell when you sorrowed, and whose smile followed your joy&mdash;I would bring
+him back to you, but&mdash;Olivarra is dead&mdash;dead at the hands of a craven
+assassin!&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The speaker turned and gazed boldly into the carriage of the president. His arm
+remained extended aloft as if to sustain his peroration. The president was
+listening, aghast, at this remarkable address of welcome. He was sunk back upon
+his seat, trembling with rage and dumb surprise, his dark hands tightly
+gripping the carriage cushions.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Half rising, he extended one arm toward the speaker, and shouted a harsh
+command at Captain Cruz. The leader of the &ldquo;Flying Hundred&rdquo; sat his
+horse, immovable, with folded arms, giving no sign of having heard. Losada sank
+back again, his dark features distinctly paling.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Who says that Olivarra is dead?&rdquo; suddenly cried the speaker, his
+voice, old as he was, sounding like a battle trumpet. &ldquo;His body lies in
+the grave, but to the people he loved he has bequeathed his spirit&mdash;yes,
+more&mdash;his learning, his courage, his kindness&mdash;yes, more&mdash;his
+youth, his image&mdash;people of Anchuria, have you forgotten Ramon, the son of
+Olivarra?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Cronin and Vincenti, watching closely, saw Dicky Maloney suddenly raise his
+hat, tear off his shock of red hair, leap up the steps and stand at the side of
+General Pilar. The Minister of War laid his arm across the young man&rsquo;s
+shoulders. All who had known President Olivarra saw again his same lion-like
+pose, the same frank, undaunted expression, the same high forehead with the
+peculiar line of the clustering, crisp black hair.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+General Pilar was an experienced orator. He seized the moment of breathless
+silence that preceded the storm.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Citizens of Anchuria,&rdquo; he trumpeted, holding aloft the keys to
+Casa Morena, &ldquo;I am here to deliver these keys&mdash;the keys to your
+homes and liberty&mdash;to your chosen president. Shall I deliver them to
+Enrico Olivarra&rsquo;s assassin, or to his son?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Olivarra! Olivarra!&rdquo; the crowd shrieked and howled. All
+vociferated the magic name&mdash;men, women, children and the parrots.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And the enthusiasm was not confined to the blood of the plebs. Colonel Rocas
+ascended the steps and laid his sword theatrically at young Ramon
+Olivarra&rsquo;s feet. Four members of the cabinet embraced him. Captain Cruz
+gave a command, and twenty of <i>El Ciento Huilando</i> dismounted and arranged
+themselves in a cordon about the steps of Casa Morena.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But Ramon Olivarra seized that moment to prove himself a born genius and
+politician. He waved those soldiers aside, and descended the steps to the
+street. There, without losing his dignity or the distinguished elegance that
+the loss of his red hair brought him, he took the proletariat to his
+bosom&mdash;the barefooted, the dirty, Indians, Caribs, babies, beggars, old,
+young, saints, soldiers and sinners&mdash;he missed none of them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+While this act of the drama was being presented, the scene shifters had been
+busy at the duties that had been assigned to them. Two of Cruz&rsquo;s dragoons
+had seized the bridle reins of Losada&rsquo;s horses; others formed a close
+guard around the carriage; and they galloped off with the tyrant and his two
+unpopular Ministers. No doubt a place had been prepared for them. There are a
+number of well-barred stone apartments in Coralio.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;<i>Rouge</i> wins,&rdquo; said Mr. Vincenti, calmly lighting another
+cigar.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Captain Cronin had been intently watching the vicinity of the stone steps for
+some time.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Good boy!&rdquo; he exclaimed suddenly, as if relieved. &ldquo;I
+wondered if he was going to forget his Kathleen Mavourneen.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Young Olivarra had reascended the steps and spoken a few words to General
+Pilar. Then that distinguished veteran descended to the ground and approached
+Pasa, who still stood, wonder-eyed, where Dicky had left her. With his plumed
+hat in his hand, and his medals and decorations shining on his breast, the
+general spoke to her and gave her his arm, and they went up the stone steps of
+the Casa Morena together. And then Ramon Olivarra stepped forward and took both
+her hands before all the people.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And while the cheering was breaking out afresh everywhere, Captain Cronin and
+Mr. Vincenti turned and walked back toward the shore where the gig was waiting
+for them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;There&rsquo;ll be another &lsquo;<i>presidente proclamada</i>&rsquo; in
+the morning,&rdquo; said Mr. Vincenti, musingly. &ldquo;As a rule they are not
+as reliable as the elected ones, but this youngster seems to have some good
+stuff in him. He planned and manœuvred the entire campaign. Olivarra&rsquo;s
+widow, you know, was wealthy. After her husband was assassinated she went to
+the States, and educated her son at Yale. The Vesuvius Company hunted him up,
+and backed him in the little game.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;It&rsquo;s a glorious thing,&rdquo; said Cronin, half jestingly,
+&ldquo;to be able to discharge a government, and insert one of your own
+choosing, in these days.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Oh, it is only a matter of business,&rdquo; said Vincenti, stopping and
+offering the stump of his cigar to a monkey that swung down from a lime tree;
+&ldquo;and that is what moves the world of to-day. That extra <i>real</i> on
+the price of bananas had to go. We took the shortest way of removing it.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap17"></a>XVII<br/>
+TWO RECALLS</h2>
+
+<p>
+There remains three duties to be performed before the curtain falls upon the
+patched comedy. Two have been promised: the third is no less obligatory.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was set forth in the programme of this tropic vaudeville that it would be
+made known why Shorty O&rsquo;Day, of the Columbia Detective Agency, lost his
+position. Also that Smith should come again to tell us what mystery he followed
+that night on the shores of Anchuria when he strewed so many cigar stumps
+around the cocoanut palm during his lonely night vigil on the beach. These
+things were promised; but a bigger thing yet remains to be
+accomplished&mdash;the clearing up of a seeming wrong that has been done
+according to the array of chronicled facts (truthfully set forth) that have
+been presented. And one voice, speaking, shall do these three things.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Two men sat on a stringer of a North River pier in the City of New York. A
+steamer from the tropics had begun to unload bananas and oranges on the pier.
+Now and then a banana or two would fall from an overripe bunch, and one of the
+two men would shamble forward, seize the fruit and return to share it with his
+companion.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+One of the men was in the ultimate stage of deterioration. As far as rain and
+wind and sun could wreck the garments he wore, it had been done. In his person
+the ravages of drink were as plainly visible. And yet, upon his high-bridged,
+rubicund nose was jauntily perched a pair of shining and flawless gold-rimmed
+glasses.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The other man was not so far gone upon the descending Highway of the
+Incompetents. Truly, the flower of his manhood had gone to seed&mdash;seed
+that, perhaps, no soil might sprout. But there were still cross-cuts along
+where he travelled through which he might yet regain the pathway of usefulness
+without disturbing the slumbering Miracles. This man was short and compactly
+built. He had an oblique, dead eye, like that of a sting-ray, and the moustache
+of a cocktail mixer. We know the eye and the moustache; we know that Smith of
+the luxurious yacht, the gorgeous raiment, the mysterious mission, the magic
+disappearance, has come again, though shorn of the accessories of his former
+state.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At his third banana, the man with the nose glasses spat it from him with a
+shudder.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Deuce take all fruit!&rdquo; he remarked, in a patrician tone of
+disgust. &ldquo;I lived for two years where these things grow. The memory of
+their taste lingers with you. The oranges are not so bad. Just see if you can
+gather a couple of them, O&rsquo;Day, when the next broken crate comes
+up.&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Did you live down with the monkeys?&rdquo; asked the other, made tepidly
+garrulous by the sunshine and the alleviating meal of juicy fruit. &ldquo;I was
+down there, once myself. But only for a few hours. That was when I was with the
+Columbia Detective Agency. The monkey people did me up. I&rsquo;d have my job
+yet if it hadn&rsquo;t been for them. I&rsquo;ll tell you about it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;One day the chief sent a note around to the office that read:
+&lsquo;Send O&rsquo;Day here at once for a big piece of business.&rsquo; I was
+the crack detective of the agency at that time. They always handed me the big
+jobs. The address the chief wrote from was down in the Wall Street district.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;When I got there I found him in a private office with a lot of directors
+who were looking pretty fuzzy. They stated the case. The president of the
+Republic Insurance Company had skipped with about a tenth of a million dollars
+in cash. The directors wanted him back pretty bad, but they wanted the money
+worse. They said they needed it. They had traced the old gent&rsquo;s movements
+to where he boarded a tramp fruit steamer bound for South America that same
+morning with his daughter and a big gripsack&mdash;all the family he had.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;One of the directors had his steam yacht coaled and with steam up, ready
+for the trip; and he turned her over to me, cart blongsh. In four hours I was
+on board of her, and hot on the trail of the fruit tub. I had a pretty good
+idea where old Wahrfield&mdash;that was his name, J. Churchill
+Wahrfield&mdash;would head for. At that time we had a treaty with about every
+foreign country except Belgium and that banana republic, Anchuria. There
+wasn&rsquo;t a photo of old Wahrfield to be had in New York&mdash;he had been
+foxy there&mdash;but I had his description. And besides, the lady with him
+would be a dead-give-away anywhere. She was one of the high-flyers in
+Society&mdash;not the kind that have their pictures in the Sunday
+papers&mdash;but the real sort that open chrysanthemum shows and christen
+battleships.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well, sir, we never got a sight of that fruit tub on the road. The ocean
+is a pretty big place; and I guess we took different paths across it. But we
+kept going toward this Anchuria, where the fruiter was bound for.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;We struck the monkey coast one afternoon about four. There was a
+ratty-looking steamer off shore taking on bananas. The monkeys were loading her
+up with big barges. It might be the one the old man had taken, and it might
+not. I went ashore to look around. The scenery was pretty good. I never saw any
+finer on the New York stage. I struck an American on shore, a big, cool chap,
+standing around with the monkeys. He showed me the consul&rsquo;s office. The
+consul was a nice young fellow. He said the fruiter was the <i>Karlsefin</i>,
+running generally to New Orleans, but took her last cargo to New York. Then I
+was sure my people were on board, although everybody told me that no passengers
+had landed. I didn&rsquo;t think they would land until after dark, for they
+might have been shy about it on account of seeing that yacht of mine hanging
+around. So, all I had to do was to wait and nab &rsquo;em when they came
+ashore. I couldn&rsquo;t arrest old Wahrfield without extradition papers, but
+my play was to get the cash. They generally give up if you strike &rsquo;em
+when they&rsquo;re tired and rattled and short on nerve.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;After dark I sat under a cocoanut tree on the beach for a while, and
+then I walked around and investigated that town some, and it was enough to give
+you the lions. If a man could stay in New York and be honest, he&rsquo;d better
+do it than to hit that monkey town with a million.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Dinky little mud houses; grass over your shoe tops in the streets;
+ladies in low-neck-and-short-sleeves walking around smoking cigars; tree frogs
+rattling like a hose cart going to a ten blow; big mountains dropping gravel in
+the back yards, and the sea licking the paint off in front&mdash;no,
+sir&mdash;a man had better be in God&rsquo;s country living on free lunch than
+there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The main street ran along the beach, and I walked down it, and then
+turned up a kind of lane where the houses were made of poles and straw. I
+wanted to see what the monkeys did when they weren&rsquo;t climbing cocoanut
+trees. The very first shack I looked in I saw my people. They must have come
+ashore while I was promenading. A man about fifty, smooth face, heavy eyebrows,
+dressed in black broadcloth, looking like he was just about to say, &lsquo;Can
+any little boy in the Sunday school answer that?&rsquo; He was freezing on to a
+grip that weighed like a dozen gold bricks, and a swell girl&mdash;a regular
+peach, with a Fifth Avenue cut&mdash;was sitting on a wooden chair. An old
+black woman was fixing some coffee and beans on a table. The light they had
+come from a lantern hung on a nail. I went and stood in the door, and they
+looked at me, and I said:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Mr. Wahrfield, you are my prisoner. I hope, for the lady&rsquo;s
+sake, you will take the matter sensibly. You know why I want you.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Who are you?&rsquo; says the old gent.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;O&rsquo;Day,&rsquo; says I, &lsquo;of the Columbia Detective
+Agency. And now, sir, let me give you a piece of good advice. You go back and
+take your medicine like a man. Hand &rsquo;em back the boodle; and maybe
+they&rsquo;ll let you off light. Go back easy, and I&rsquo;ll put in a word for
+you. I&rsquo;ll give you five minutes to decide.&rsquo; I pulled out my watch
+and waited.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Then the young lady chipped in. She was one of the genuine
+high-steppers. You could tell by the way her clothes fit and the style she had
+that Fifth Avenue was made for her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Come inside,&rsquo; she says. &lsquo;Don&rsquo;t stand in the
+door and disturb the whole street with that suit of clothes. Now, what is it
+you want?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Three minutes gone,&rsquo; I said. &lsquo;I&rsquo;ll tell you
+again while the other two tick off.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;You&rsquo;ll admit being the president of the Republic,
+won&rsquo;t you?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I am,&rsquo; says he.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Well, then,&rsquo; says I, &lsquo;it ought to be plain to you.
+Wanted, in New York, J. Churchill Wahrfield, president of the Republic
+Insurance Company.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Also the funds belonging to said company, now in that grip, in
+the unlawful possession of said J. Churchill Wahrfield.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Oh-h-h-h!&rsquo; says the young lady, as if she was thinking,
+&lsquo;you want to take us back to New York?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;To take Mr. Wahrfield. There&rsquo;s no charge against you, miss.
+There&rsquo;ll be no objection, of course, to your returning with your
+father.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Of a sudden the girl gave a tiny scream and grabbed the old boy around
+the neck. &lsquo;Oh, father, father!&rsquo; she says, kind of contralto,
+&lsquo;can this be true? Have you taken money that is not yours? Speak,
+father!&rsquo; It made you shiver to hear the tremolo stop she put on her
+voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The old boy looked pretty bughouse when she first grappled him, but she
+went on, whispering in his ear and patting his off shoulder till he stood
+still, but sweating a little.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;She got him to one side and they talked together a minute, and then he
+put on some gold eyeglasses and walked up and handed me the grip.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Mr. Detective,&rsquo; he says, talking a little broken, &lsquo;I
+conclude to return with you. I have finished to discover that life on this
+desolate and displeased coast would be worse than to die, itself. I will go
+back and hurl myself upon the mercy of the Republic Company. Have you brought a
+sheep?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Sheep!&rsquo; says I; &lsquo;I haven&rsquo;t a
+single&mdash;&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Ship,&rsquo; cut in the young lady. &lsquo;Don&rsquo;t get funny.
+Father is of German birth, and doesn&rsquo;t speak perfect English. How did you
+come?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The girl was all broke up. She had a handkerchief to her face, and kept
+saying every little bit, &lsquo;Oh, father, father!&rsquo; She walked up to me
+and laid her lily-white hand on the clothes that had pained her at first. I
+smelt a million violets. She was a lulu. I told her I came in a private yacht.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Mr. O&rsquo;Day,&rsquo; she says. &lsquo;Oh, take us away from
+this horrid country at once. Can you! Will you! Say you will.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;I&rsquo;ll try,&rsquo; I said, concealing the fact that I was
+dying to get them on salt water before they could change their mind.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;One thing they both kicked against was going through the town to the
+boat landing. Said they dreaded publicity, and now that they were going to
+return, they had a hope that the thing might yet be kept out of the papers.
+They swore they wouldn&rsquo;t go unless I got them out to the yacht without
+any one knowing it, so I agreed to humour them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The sailors who rowed me ashore were playing billiards in a bar-room
+near the water, waiting for orders, and I proposed to have them take the boat
+down the beach half a mile or so, and take us up there. How to get them word
+was the question, for I couldn&rsquo;t leave the grip with the prisoner, and I
+couldn&rsquo;t take it with me, not knowing but what the monkeys might stick me
+up.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The young lady says the old coloured woman would take them a note. I sat
+down and wrote it, and gave it to the dame with plain directions what to do,
+and she grins like a baboon and shakes her head.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Then Mr. Wahrfield handed her a string of foreign dialect, and she nods
+her head and says, &lsquo;See, señor,&rsquo; maybe fifty times, and lights out
+with the note.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Old Augusta only understands German,&rsquo; said Miss Wahrfield,
+smiling at me. &lsquo;We stopped in her house to ask where we could find
+lodging, and she insisted upon our having coffee. She tells us she was raised
+in a German family in San Domingo.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Very likely,&rsquo; I said. &lsquo;But you can search me for
+German words, except <i>nix verstay</i> and <i>noch einst</i>. I would have
+called that &ldquo;See, señor&rdquo; French, though, on a gamble.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Well, we three made a sneak around the edge of town so as not to be
+seen. We got tangled in vines and ferns and the banana bushes and tropical
+scenery a good deal. The monkey suburbs was as wild as places in Central Park.
+We came out on the beach a good half mile below. A brown chap was lying asleep
+under a cocoanut tree, with a ten-foot musket beside him. Mr. Wahrfield takes
+up the gun and pitches it into the sea. &lsquo;The coast is guarded,&rsquo; he
+says. &lsquo;Rebellion and plots ripen like fruit.&rsquo; He pointed to the
+sleeping man, who never stirred. &lsquo;Thus,&rsquo; he says, &lsquo;they
+perform trusts. Children!&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I saw our boat coming, and I struck a match and lit a piece of newspaper
+to show them where we were. In thirty minutes we were on board the yacht.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The first thing, Mr. Wahrfield and his daughter and I took the grip into
+the owner&rsquo;s cabin, opened it up, and took an inventory. There was one
+hundred and five thousand dollars, United States treasury notes, in it, besides
+a lot of diamond jewelry and a couple of hundred Havana cigars. I gave the old
+man the cigars and a receipt for the rest of the lot, as agent for the company,
+and locked the stuff up in my private quarters.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I never had a pleasanter trip than that one. After we got to sea the
+young lady turned out to be the jolliest ever. The very first time we sat down
+to dinner, and the steward filled her glass with champagne&mdash;that
+director&rsquo;s yacht was a regular floating Waldorf-Astoria&mdash;she winks
+at me and says, &lsquo;What&rsquo;s the use to borrow trouble, Mr. Fly Cop?
+Here&rsquo;s hoping you may live to eat the hen that scratches on your
+grave.&rsquo; There was a piano on board, and she sat down to it and sung
+better than you give up two cases to hear plenty times. She knew about nine
+operas clear through. She was sure enough <i>bon ton</i> and swell. She
+wasn&rsquo;t one of the &lsquo;among others present&rsquo; kind; she belonged
+on the special mention list!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The old man, too, perked up amazingly on the way. He passed the cigars,
+and says to me once, quite chipper, out of a cloud of smoke, &lsquo;Mr.
+O&rsquo;Day, somehow I think the Republic Company will not give me the much
+trouble. Guard well the gripvalise of the money, Mr. O&rsquo;Day, for that it
+must be returned to them that it belongs when we finish to arrive.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;When we landed in New York I &rsquo;phoned to the chief to meet us in
+that director&rsquo;s office. We got in a cab and went there. I carried the
+grip, and we walked in, and I was pleased to see that the chief had got
+together that same old crowd of moneybugs with pink faces and white vests to
+see us march in. I set the grip on the table. &lsquo;There&rsquo;s the
+money,&rsquo; I said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;And your prisoner?&rsquo; said the chief.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I pointed to Mr. Wahrfield, and he stepped forward and says:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;The honour of a word with you, sir, to explain.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;He and the chief went into another room and stayed ten minutes. When
+they came back the chief looked as black as a ton of coal.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Did this gentleman,&rsquo; he says to me, &lsquo;have this valise
+in his possession when you first saw him?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;He did,&rsquo; said I.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;The chief took up the grip and handed it to the prisoner with a bow, and
+says to the director crowd: &lsquo;Do any of you recognize this
+gentleman?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They all shook their pink faces.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;Allow me to present,&rsquo; he goes on, Señor Miraflores,
+president of the republic of Anchuria. The señor has generously consented to
+overlook this outrageous blunder, on condition that we undertake to secure him
+against the annoyance of public comment. It is a concession on his part to
+overlook an insult for which he might claim international redress. I think we
+can gratefully promise him secrecy in the matter.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;They gave him a pink nod all round.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;O&rsquo;Day,&rsquo; he says to me. &lsquo;As a private detective
+you&rsquo;re wasted. In a war, where kidnapping governments is in the rules,
+you&rsquo;d be invaluable. Come down to the office at eleven.&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;I knew what that meant.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;&lsquo;So that&rsquo;s the president of the monkeys,&rsquo; says I.
+&lsquo;Well, why couldn&rsquo;t he have said so?&rsquo;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+&ldquo;Wouldn&rsquo;t it jar you?&rdquo;
+</p>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div class="chapter">
+
+<h2><a name="chap18"></a>XVIII<br/>
+THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE</h2>
+
+<p>
+Vaudeville is intrinsically episodic and discontinuous. Its audiences do not
+demand dénouements. Sufficient unto each &ldquo;turn&rdquo; is the evil
+thereof. No one cares how many romances the singing comédienne may have had if
+she can capably sustain the limelight and a high note or two. The audiences
+reck not if the performing dogs get to the pound the moment they have jumped
+through their last hoop. They do not desire bulletins about the possible
+injuries received by the comic bicyclist who retires head-first from the stage
+in a crash of (property) china-ware. Neither do they consider that their seat
+coupons entitle them to be instructed whether or no there is a sentiment
+between the lady solo banjoist and the Irish monologist.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Therefore let us have no lifting of the curtain upon a tableau of the united
+lovers, backgrounded by defeated villainy and derogated by the comic,
+osculating maid and butler, thrown in as a sop to the Cerberi of the fifty-cent
+seats.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But our programme ends with a brief &ldquo;turn&rdquo; or two; and then to the
+exits. Whoever sits the show out may find, if he will, the slender thread that
+binds together, though ever so slightly, the story that, perhaps, only the
+Walrus will understand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+<i>Extracts from a letter from the first vice-president of the Republic
+Insurance Company, of New York City, to Frank Goodwin, of Coralio, Republic of
+Anchuria.</i>
+</p>
+
+<p class="letter">
+My Dear Mr. Goodwin:&mdash;Your communication per Messrs. Howland and Fourchet,
+of New Orleans, has reached us. Also their draft on N. Y. for $100,000, the
+amount abstracted from the funds of this company by the late J. Churchill
+Wahrfield, its former president. … The officers and directors unite in
+requesting me to express to you their sincere esteem and thanks for your prompt
+and much appreciated return of the entire missing sum within two weeks from the
+time of its disappearance. … Can assure you that the matter will not be allowed
+to receive the least publicity. … Regret exceedingly the distressing death of
+Mr. Wahrfield by his own hand, but… Congratulations on your marriage to Miss
+Wahrfield … many charms, winning manners, noble and womanly nature and envied
+position in the best metropolitan society…
+</p>
+
+<p class="right">
+Cordially yours,<br/>
+Lucius E. Applegate,<br/>
+First Vice-President the Republic Insurance Company.
+</p>
+
+<h3><i>The Vitagraphoscope</i><br/>
+(Moving Pictures)</h3>
+
+<h3><i>The Last Sausage</i></h3>
+
+<p>
+SCENE&mdash;<i>An Artist&rsquo;s Studio.</i> The artist, a young man of
+prepossessing appearance, sits in a dejected attitude, amid a litter of
+sketches, with his head resting upon his hand. An oil stove stands on a pine
+box in the centre of the studio. The artist rises, tightens his waist belt to
+another hole, and lights the stove. He goes to a tin bread box, half-hidden by
+a screen, takes out a solitary link of sausage, turns the box upside-down to
+show that there is no more, and chucks the sausage into a frying-pan, which he
+sets upon the stove. The flame of the stove goes out, showing that there is no
+more oil. The artist, in evident despair, seizes the sausage, in a sudden
+access of rage, and hurls it violently from him. At the same time a door opens,
+and a man who enters receives the sausage forcibly against his nose. He seems
+to cry out; and is observed to make a dance step or two, vigorously. The
+newcomer is a ruddy-faced, active, keen-looking man, apparently of Irish
+ancestry. Next he is observed to laugh immoderately; he kicks over the stove;
+he claps the artist (who is vainly striving to grasp his hand) vehemently upon
+the back. Then he goes through a pantomime which to the sufficiently
+intelligent spectator reveals that he has acquired large sums of money by
+trading pot-metal hatchets and razors to the Indians of the Cordillera
+Mountains for gold dust. He draws a roll of money as large as a small loaf of
+bread from his pocket, and waves it above his head, while at the same time he
+makes pantomime of drinking from a glass. The artist hurriedly secures his hat,
+and the two leave the studio together.
+</p>
+
+<h3><i>The Writing on the Sands</i></h3>
+
+<p>
+SCENE&mdash;<i>The Beach at Nice.</i> A woman, beautiful, still young,
+exquisitely clothed, complacent, poised, reclines near the water, idly
+scrawling letters in the sand with the staff of her silken parasol. The beauty
+of her face is audacious; her languid pose is one that you feel to be
+impermanent&mdash;you wait, expectant, for her to spring or glide or crawl,
+like a panther that has unaccountably become stock-still. She idly scrawls in
+the sand; and the word that she always writes is &ldquo;Isabel.&rdquo; A man
+sits a few yards away. You can see that they are companions, even if no longer
+comrades. His face is dark and smooth, and almost inscrutable&mdash;but not
+quite. The two speak little together. The man also scratches on the sand with
+his cane. And the word that he writes is &ldquo;Anchuria.&rdquo; And then he
+looks out where the Mediterranean and the sky intermingle, with death in his
+gaze.
+</p>
+
+<h3><i>The Wilderness and Thou</i></h3>
+
+<p>
+SCENE&mdash;<i>The Borders of a Gentleman&rsquo;s Estate in a Tropical
+Land.</i> An old Indian, with a mahogany-coloured face, is trimming the grass
+on a grave by a mangrove swamp. Presently he rises to his feet and walks slowly
+toward a grove that is shaded by the gathering, brief twilight. In the edge of
+the grove stand a man who is stalwart, with a kind and courteous air, and a
+woman of a serene and clear-cut loveliness. When the old Indian comes up to
+them the man drops money in his hand. The grave-tender, with the stolid pride
+of his race, takes it as his due, and goes his way. The two in the edge of the
+grove turn back along the dim pathway, and walk close, close&mdash;for, after
+all, what is the world at its best but a little round field of the moving
+pictures with two walking together in it?
+</p>
+
+<h3>CURTAIN</h3>
+
+</div><!--end chapter-->
+
+<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CABBAGES AND KINGS ***</div>
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #2777 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/2777)
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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Cabbages and Kings, by O. Henry
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: Cabbages and Kings
+
+
+Author: O. Henry
+
+
+
+Release Date: July 23, 2000 [eBook #2777]
+Most recently updated June 5, 2019
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CABBAGES AND KINGS***
+
+
+E-text prepared by Earle C. Beach
+and revised by Joseph E. Loewenstein, M.D.
+
+
+
+Editorial note:
+
+ This volume is the only work of O. Henry which approaches
+ being a novel. The stories are related and should be read
+ in the sequence in which they occur in the text.
+
+
+ Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this
+ file which includes the original illustration.
+ See 2777-h.htm or 2777-h.zip:
+ (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/7/7/2777/2777-h/24910-h.htm)
+ or
+ (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/7/7/2777/2777-h.zip)
+
+
+
+
+
+CABBAGES AND KINGS
+
+by
+
+O. HENRY
+
+Author of "The Four Million," "The Voice of the City,"
+"The Trimmed Lamp," "Strictly Business," "Whirligigs," Etc.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[ILLUSTRATION: "A little saint with a color more lightful
+than orange" (frontispiece)]
+
+
+
+
+"The time has come," the Walrus said,
+ "To talk of many things;
+Of shoes and ships and sealing-wax,
+ And cabbages and kings."
+
+ THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER
+
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+ THE PROEM: BY THE CARPENTER
+ I. "FOX-IN-THE-MORNING"
+ II. THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE
+ III. SMITH
+ IV. CAUGHT
+ V. CUPID'S EXILE NUMBER TWO
+ VI. THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT
+ VII. MONEY MAZE
+ VIII. THE ADMIRAL
+ IX. THE FLAG PARAMOUNT
+ X. THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM
+ XI. THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE
+ XII. SHOES
+ XIII. SHIPS
+ XIV. MASTERS OF ARTS
+ XV. DICKY
+ XVI. ROUGE ET NOIR
+ XVII. TWO RECALLS
+ XVIII. THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE
+
+
+
+
+THE PROEM
+
+BY THE CARPENTER
+
+
+They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that
+volatile republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio;
+that he had reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of
+an imminent revolution; and that one hundred thousand dollars,
+government funds, which he carried with him in an American leather
+valise as a souvenir of his tempestuous administration, was never
+afterward recovered.
+
+For a _real_, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town
+near a little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of
+wood stands at its head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with
+a hot iron this inscription:
+
+
+ RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES
+
+ Y MIRAFLORES
+
+ PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA
+
+ DE ANCHURIA
+
+ QUE SEA SU JUEZ DIOS
+
+
+It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man
+beyond the grave. "Let God be his judge!"--Even with the hundred
+thousand unfound, though greatly coveted, the hue and cry went no
+further than that.
+
+To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the
+story of the tragic end of their former president; how he strove to
+escape from the country with the public funds and also with Doa
+Isabel Guilbert, the young American opera singer; and how, being
+apprehended by members of the opposing political party in Coralio,
+he shot himself through the head rather than give up the funds, and,
+in consequence, the Seorita Guilbert. They will relate further
+that Doa Isabel, her adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the
+simultaneous loss of her distinguished admirer and the souvenir
+hundred thousand, dropped anchor on this stagnant coast, awaiting a
+rising tide.
+
+They say, in Coralio, that she found a prompt and prosperous tide
+in the form of Frank Goodwin, an American resident of the town, an
+investor who had grown wealthy by dealing in the products of the
+country--a banana king, a rubber prince, a sarsaparilla, indigo, and
+mahogany baron. The Seorita Guilbert, you will be told, married
+Seor Goodwin one month after the president's death, thus, in the
+very moment when Fortune had ceased to smile, wresting from her a
+gift greater than the prize withdrawn.
+
+Of the American, Don Frank Goodwin, and of his wife the natives have
+nothing but good to say. Don Frank has lived among them for years,
+and has compelled their respect. His lady is easily queen of what
+social life the sober coast affords. The wife of the governor of the
+district, herself, who was of the proud Castilian family of Monteleon
+y Dolorosa de los Santos y Mendez, feels honoured to unfold her
+napkin with olive-hued, ringed hands at the table of Seora Goodwin.
+Were you to refer (with your northern prejudices) to the vivacious
+past of Mrs. Goodwin when her audacious and gleeful abandon in light
+opera captured the mature president's fancy, or to her share in that
+statesman's downfall and malfeasance, the Latin shrug of the shoulder
+would be your only answer and rebuttal. What prejudices there were
+in Coralio concerning Seora Goodwin seemed now to be in her favour,
+whatever they had been in the past.
+
+It would seem that the story is ended, instead of begun; that the
+close of tragedy and the climax of a romance have covered the ground
+of interest; but, to the more curious reader it shall be some slight
+instruction to trace the close threads that underlie the ingenuous
+web of circumstances.
+
+The headpiece bearing the name of President Miraflores is daily
+scrubbed with soap-bark and sand. An old half-breed Indian tends the
+grave with fidelity and the dawdling minuteness of inherited sloth.
+He chops down the weeds and ever-springing grass with his machete, he
+plucks ants and scorpions and beetles from it with his horny fingers,
+and sprinkles its turf with water from the plaza fountain. There is
+no grave anywhere so well kept and ordered.
+
+Only by following out the underlying threads will it be made clear
+why the old Indian, Galvez, is secretly paid to keep green the
+grave of President Miraflores by one who never saw that unfortunate
+statesman in life or in death, and why that one was wont to walk in
+the twilight, casting from a distance looks of gentle sadness upon
+that unhonoured mound.
+
+Elsewhere than at Coralio one learns of the impetuous career
+of Isabel Guilbert. New Orleans gave her birth and the mingled
+French and Spanish creole nature that tinctured her life with such
+turbulence and warmth. She had little education, but a knowledge of
+men and motives that seemed to have come by instinct. Far beyond the
+common woman was she endowed with intrepid rashness, with a love for
+the pursuit of adventure to the brink of danger, and with desire for
+the pleasures of life. Her spirit was one to chafe under any curb;
+she was Eve after the fall, but before the bitterness of it was felt.
+She wore life as a rose in her bosom.
+
+Of the legion of men who had been at her feet it was said that but
+one was so fortunate as to engage her fancy. To President Miraflores,
+the brilliant but unstable ruler of Anchuria, she yielded the key to
+her resolute heart. How, then, do we find her (as the Coralians would
+have told you) the wife of Frank Goodwin, and happily living a life
+of dull and dreamy inaction?
+
+The underlying threads reach far, stretching across the sea.
+Following them out it will be made plain why "Shorty" O'Day, of the
+Columbia Detective Agency, resigned his position. And, for a lighter
+pastime, it shall be a duty and a pleasing sport to wander with Momus
+beneath the tropic stars where Melpomene once stalked austere. Now to
+cause laughter to echo from those lavish jungles and frowning crags
+where formerly rang the cries of pirates' victims; to lay aside pike
+and cutlass and attack with quip and jollity; to draw one saving
+titter of mirth from the rusty casque of Romance--this were pleasant
+to do in the shade of the lemon-trees on that coast that is curved
+like lips set for smiling.
+
+For there are yet tales of the Spanish Main. That segment of
+continent washed by the tempestuous Caribbean, and presenting to the
+sea a formidable border of tropical jungle topped by the overweening
+Cordilleras, is still begirt by mystery and romance. In past times
+buccaneers and revolutionists roused the echoes of its cliffs, and
+the condor wheeled perpetually above where, in the green groves,
+they made food for him with their matchlocks and toledos. Taken and
+retaken by sea rovers, by adverse powers and by sudden uprising of
+rebellious factions, the historic 300 miles of adventurous coast has
+scarcely known for hundreds of years whom rightly to call its master.
+Pizarro, Balboa, Sir Francis Drake, and Bolivar did what they could
+to make it a part of Christendom. Sir John Morgan, Lafitte and other
+eminent swash-bucklers bombarded and pounded it in the name of
+Abaddon.
+
+The game still goes on. The guns of the rovers are silenced; but the
+tintype man, the enlarged photograph brigand, the kodaking tourist
+and the scouts of the gentle brigade of fakirs have found it out, and
+carry on the work. The hucksters of Germany, France, and Sicily now
+bag its small change across their counters. Gentleman adventurers
+throng the waiting-rooms of its rulers with proposals for railways
+and concessions. The little _opra-bouffe_ nations play at government
+and intrigue until some day a big, silent gunboat glides into the
+offing and warns them not to break their toys. And with these changes
+comes also the small adventurer, with empty pockets to fill, light of
+heart, busy-brained--the modern fairy prince, bearing an alarm clock
+with which, more surely than by the sentimental kiss, to awaken the
+beautiful tropics from their centuries' sleep. Generally he wears a
+shamrock, which he matches pridefully against the extravagant palms;
+and it is he who has driven Melpomene to the wings, and set Comedy to
+dancing before the footlights of the Southern Cross.
+
+So, there is a little tale to tell of many things. Perhaps to the
+promiscuous ear of the Walrus it shall come with most avail; for in
+it there are indeed shoes and ships and sealing-wax and cabbage-palms
+and presidents instead of kings.
+
+Add to these a little love and counterplotting, and scatter
+everywhere throughout the maze a trail of tropical dollars--dollars
+warmed no more by the torrid sun than by the hot palms of the scouts
+of Fortune--and, after all, here seems to be Life, itself, with talk
+enough to weary the most garrulous of Walruses.
+
+
+
+
+I
+
+"FOX-IN-THE-MORNING"
+
+
+Coralio reclined, in the mid-day heat, like some vacuous beauty
+lounging in a guarded harem. The town lay at the sea's edge on a
+strip of alluvial coast. It was set like a little pearl in an emerald
+band. Behind it, and seeming almost to topple, imminent, above it,
+rose the sea-following range of the Cordilleras. In front the sea
+was spread, a smiling jailer, but even more incorruptible than the
+frowning mountains. The waves swished along the smooth beach; the
+parrots screamed in the orange and ceiba-trees; the palms waved their
+limber fronds foolishly like an awkward chorus at the prima donna's
+cue to enter.
+
+Suddenly the town was full of excitement. A native boy dashed down a
+grass-grown street, shrieking: "_Busca el Seor Goodwin. Ha venido un
+telgrafo por el!_"
+
+The word passed quickly. Telegrams do not often come to anyone in
+Coralio. The cry for Seor Goodwin was taken up by a dozen officious
+voices. The main street running parallel to the beach became
+populated with those who desired to expedite the delivery of the
+despatch. Knots of women with complexions varying from palest olive
+to deepest brown gathered at street corners and plaintively carolled:
+"_Un telgrafo por Seor Goodwin!_" The _comandante_, Don Seor el
+Coronel Encarnacin Rios, who was loyal to the Ins and suspected
+Goodwin's devotion to the Outs, hissed: "Aha!" and wrote in his
+secret memorandum book the accusive fact that Seor Goodwin had on
+that momentous date received a telegram.
+
+In the midst of the hullabaloo a man stepped to the door of a small
+wooden building and looked out. Above the door was a sign that read
+"Keogh and Clancy"--a nomenclature that seemed not to be indigenous
+to that tropical soil. The man in the door was Billy Keogh, scout
+of fortune and progress and latter-day rover of the Spanish Main.
+Tintypes and photographs were the weapons with which Keogh and Clancy
+were at that time assailing the hopeless shores. Outside the shop
+were set two large frames filled with specimens of their art and
+skill.
+
+Keogh leaned in the doorway, his bold and humorous countenance
+wearing a look of interest at the unusual influx of life and sound
+into the street. When the meaning of the disturbance became clear to
+him he placed a hand beside his mouth and shouted: "Hey! Frank!" in
+such a robustious voice that the feeble clamour of the natives was
+drowned and silenced.
+
+Fifty yards away, on the seaward side of the street, stood the abode
+of the consul for the United States. Out from the door of this
+building tumbled Goodwin at the call. He had been smoking with
+Willard Geddie, the consul, on the back porch of the consulate, which
+was conceded to be the coolest spot in Coralio.
+
+"Hurry up," shouted Keogh. "There's a riot in town on account of a
+telegram that's come for you. You want to be careful about these
+things, my boy. It won't do to trifle with the feelings of the
+public this way. You'll be getting a pink note some day with violet
+scent on it; and then the country'll be steeped in the throes of a
+revolution."
+
+Goodwin had strolled up the street and met the boy with the message.
+The ox-eyed women gazed at him with shy admiration, for his type drew
+them. He was big, blonde, and jauntily dressed in white linen, with
+buckskin _zapatos_. His manner was courtly, with a sort of kindly
+truculence in it, tempered by a merciful eye. When the telegram had
+been delivered, and the bearer of it dismissed with a gratuity, the
+relieved populace returned to the contiguities of shade from which
+curiosity had drawn it--the women to their baking in the mud ovens
+under the orange-trees, or to the interminable combing of their
+long, straight hair; the men to their cigarettes and gossip in the
+cantinas.
+
+Goodwin sat on Keogh's doorstep, and read his telegram. It was from
+Bob Englehart, an American, who lived in San Mateo, the capital city
+of Anchuria, eighty miles in the interior. Englehart was a gold
+miner, an ardent revolutionist and "good people." That he was a man
+of resource and imagination was proven by the telegram he had sent.
+It had been his task to send a confidential message to his friend in
+Coralio. This could not have been accomplished in either Spanish or
+English, for the eye politic in Anchuria was an active one. The Ins
+and the Outs were perpetually on their guard. But Englehart was a
+diplomatist. There existed but one code upon which he might make
+requisition with promise of safety--the great and potent code of
+Slang. So, here is the message that slipped, unconstrued, through
+the fingers of curious officials, and came to the eye of Goodwin:
+
+
+ His Nibs skedaddled yesterday per jack-rabbit line with all
+ the coin in the kitty and the bundle of muslin he's spoony
+ about. The boodle is six figures short. Our crowd in good
+ shape, but we need the spondulicks. You collar it. The main
+ guy and the dry goods are headed for the briny. You know
+ what to do.
+
+ BOB.
+
+
+This screed, remarkable as it was, had no mystery for Goodwin. He
+was the most successful of the small advance-guard of speculative
+Americans that had invaded Anchuria, and he had not reached that
+enviable pinnacle without having well exercised the arts of foresight
+and deduction. He had taken up political intrigue as a matter of
+business. He was acute enough to wield a certain influence among
+the leading schemers, and he was prosperous enough to be able to
+purchase the respect of the petty office-holders. There was always
+a revolutionary party; and to it he had always allied himself; for
+the adherents of a new administration received the rewards of their
+labours. There was now a Liberal party seeking to overturn President
+Miraflores. If the wheel successfully revolved, Goodwin stood to
+win a concession to 30,000 manzanas of the finest coffee lands in
+the interior. Certain incidents in the recent career of President
+Miraflores had excited a shrewd suspicion in Goodwin's mind that the
+government was near a dissolution from another cause than that of a
+revolution, and now Englehart's telegram had come as a corroboration
+of his wisdom.
+
+The telegram, which had remained unintelligible to the Anchurian
+linguists who had applied to it in vain their knowledge of Spanish
+and elemental English, conveyed a stimulating piece of news to
+Goodwin's understanding. It informed him that the president of the
+republic had decamped from the capital city with the contents of the
+treasury. Furthermore, that he was accompanied in his flight by that
+winning adventuress Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer, whose troupe
+of performers had been entertained by the president at San Mateo
+during the past month on a scale less modest than that with which
+royal visitors are often content. The reference to the "jack-rabbit
+line" could mean nothing else than the mule-back system of transport
+that prevailed between Coralio and the capital. The hint that the
+"boodle" was "six figures short" made the condition of the national
+treasury lamentably clear. Also it was convincingly true that the
+ingoing party--its way now made a pacific one--would need the
+"spondulicks." Unless its pledges should be fulfilled, and the spoils
+held for the delectation of the victors, precarious indeed, would
+be the position of the new government. Therefore it was exceeding
+necessary to "collar the main guy," and recapture the sinews of war
+and government.
+
+Goodwin handed the message to Keogh.
+
+"Read that, Billy," he said. "It's from Bob Englehart. Can you manage
+the cipher?"
+
+Keogh sat in the other half of the doorway, and carefully perused the
+telegram.
+
+"'Tis not a cipher," he said, finally. "'Tis what they call
+literature, and that's a system of language put in the mouths
+of people that they've never been introduced to by writers of
+imagination. The magazines invented it, but I never knew before that
+President Norvin Green had stamped it with the seal of his approval.
+'Tis now no longer literature, but language. The dictionaries tried,
+but they couldn't make it go for anything but dialect. Sure, now that
+the Western Union indorses it, it won't be long till a race of people
+will spring up that speaks it."
+
+"You're running too much to philology, Billy," said Goodwin. "Do you
+make out the meaning of it?"
+
+"Sure," replied the philosopher of Fortune. "All languages come easy
+to the man who must know 'em. I've even failed to misunderstand an
+order to evacuate in classical Chinese when it was backed up by the
+muzzle of a breech-loader. This little literary essay I hold in my
+hands means a game of Fox-in-the-Morning. Ever play that, Frank, when
+you was a kid?"
+
+"I think so," said Goodwin, laughing. "You join hands all 'round,
+and--"
+
+"You do not," interrupted Keogh. "You've got a fine sporting game
+mixed up in your head with 'All Around the Rosebush.' The spirit of
+'Fox-in-the-Morning' is opposed to the holding of hands. I'll tell
+you how it's played. This president man and his companion in play,
+they stand up over in San Mateo, ready for the run, and shout:
+'Fox-in-the-Morning!' Me and you, standing here, we say: 'Goose and
+the Gander!' They say: 'How many miles is it to London town?' We say:
+'Only a few, if your legs are long enough. How many comes out?' They
+say: 'More than you're able to catch.' And then the game commences."
+
+"I catch the idea," said Goodwin. "It won't do to let the goose
+and gander slip through our fingers, Billy; their feathers are too
+valuable. Our crowd is prepared and able to step into the shoes of
+the government at once; but with the treasury empty we'd stay in
+power about as long as a tenderfoot would stick on an untamed bronco.
+We must play the fox on every foot of the coast to prevent their
+getting out of the country."
+
+"By the mule-back schedule," said Keogh, "it's five days down from
+San Mateo. We've got plenty of time to set our outposts. There's only
+three places on the coast where they can hope to sail from--here and
+Solitas and Alazan. They're the only points we'll have to guard. It's
+as easy as a chess problem--fox to play, and mate in three moves. Oh,
+goosey, goosey, gander, whither do you wander? By the blessing of the
+literary telegraph the boodle of this benighted fatherland shall be
+preserved to the honest political party that is seeking to overthrow
+it."
+
+The situation had been justly outlined by Keogh. The down trail
+from the capital was at all times a weary road to travel. A
+jiggety-joggety journey it was; ice-cold and hot, wet and dry. The
+trail climbed appalling mountains, wound like a rotten string about
+the brows of breathless precipices, plunged through chilling snow-fed
+streams, and wriggled like a snake through sunless forests teeming
+with menacing insect and animal life. After descending to the
+foothills it turned to a trident, the central prong ending at Alazan.
+Another branched off to Coralio; the third penetrated to Solitas.
+Between the sea and the foothills stretched the five miles breadth of
+alluvial coast. Here was the flora of the tropics in its rankest and
+most prodigal growth. Spaces here and there had been wrested from the
+jungle and planted with bananas and cane and orange groves. The rest
+was a riot of wild vegetation, the home of monkeys, tapirs, jaguars,
+alligators and prodigious reptiles and insects. Where no road was cut
+a serpent could scarcely make its way through the tangle of vines and
+creepers. Across the treacherous mangrove swamps few things without
+wings could safely pass. Therefore the fugitives could hope to reach
+the coast only by one of the routes named.
+
+"Keep the matter quiet, Billy," advised Goodwin. "We don't want
+the Ins to know that the president is in flight. I suppose Bob's
+information is something of a scoop in the capital as yet. Otherwise
+he would not have tried to make his message a confidential one; and
+besides, everybody would have heard the news. I'm going around now to
+see Dr. Zavalla, and start a man up the trail to cut the telegraph
+wire."
+
+As Goodwin rose, Keogh threw his hat upon the grass by the door and
+expelled a tremendous sigh.
+
+"What's the trouble, Billy?" asked Goodwin, pausing. "That's the
+first time I ever heard you sigh."
+
+"'Tis the last," said Keogh. "With that sorrowful puff of wind I
+resign myself to a life of praiseworthy but harassing honesty. What
+are tintypes, if you please, to the opportunities of the great
+and hilarious class of ganders and geese? Not that I would be a
+president, Frank--and the boodle he's got is too big for me to
+handle--but in some ways I feel my conscience hurting me for
+addicting myself to photographing a nation instead of running away
+with it. Frank, did you ever see the 'bundle of muslin' that His
+Excellency has wrapped up and carried off?"
+
+"Isabel Guilbert?" said Goodwin, laughing. "No, I never did. From
+what I've heard of her, though, I imagine that she wouldn't stick at
+anything to carry her point. Don't get romantic, Billy. Sometimes I
+begin to fear that there's Irish blood in your ancestry."
+
+"I never saw her either," went on Keogh; "but they say she's got all
+the ladies of mythology, sculpture, and fiction reduced to chromos.
+They say she can look at a man once, and he'll turn monkey and climb
+trees to pick cocoanuts for her. Think of that president man with
+Lord knows how many hundreds of thousands of dollars in one hand, and
+this muslin siren in the other, galloping down hill on a sympathetic
+mule amid songbirds and flowers! And here is Billy Keogh, because he
+is virtuous, condemned to the unprofitable swindle of slandering the
+faces of missing links on tin for an honest living! 'Tis an injustice
+of nature."
+
+"Cheer up," said Goodwin. "You are a pretty poor fox to be envying a
+gander. Maybe the enchanting Guilbert will take a fancy to you and
+your tintypes after we impoverish her royal escort."
+
+"She could do worse," reflected Keogh; "but she won't. 'Tis not a
+tintype gallery, but the gallery of the gods that she's fitted to
+adorn. She's a very wicked lady, and the president man is in luck.
+But I hear Clancy swearing in the back room for having to do all the
+work." And Keogh plunged for the rear of the "gallery," whistling
+gaily in a spontaneous way that belied his recent sigh over the
+questionable good luck of the flying president.
+
+Goodwin turned from the main street into a much narrower one that
+intersected it at a right angle.
+
+These side streets were covered by a growth of thick, rank grass,
+which was kept to a navigable shortness by the machetes of the
+police. Stone sidewalks, little more than a ledge in width, ran along
+the base of the mean and monotonous adobe houses. At the outskirts
+of the village these streets dwindled to nothing; and here were set
+the palm-thatched huts of the Caribs and the poorer natives, and the
+shabby cabins of negroes from Jamaica and the West India islands. A
+few structures raised their heads above the red-tiled roofs of the
+one-story houses--the bell tower of the _Calaboza_, the Hotel de los
+Estranjeros, the residence of the Vesuvius Fruit Company's agent,
+the store and residence of Bernard Brannigan, a ruined cathedral in
+which Columbus had once set foot, and, most imposing of all, the
+Casa Morena--the summer "White House" of the President of Anchuria.
+On the principal street running along the beach--the Broadway
+of Coralio--were the larger stores, the government _bodega_ and
+post-office, the _cuartel_, the rum-shops and the market place.
+
+On his way Goodwin passed the house of Bernard Brannigan. It was a
+modern wooden building, two stories in height. The ground floor was
+occupied by Brannigan's store, the upper one contained the living
+apartments. A wide cool porch ran around the house half way up its
+outer walls. A handsome, vivacious girl neatly dressed in flowing
+white leaned over the railing and smiled down upon Goodwin. She was
+no darker than many an Andalusian of high descent; and she sparkled
+and glowed like a tropical moonlight.
+
+"Good evening, Miss Paula," said Goodwin, taking off his hat, with
+his ready smile. There was little difference in his manner whether
+he addressed women or men. Everybody in Coralio liked to receive the
+salutation of the big American.
+
+"Is there any news, Mr. Goodwin? Please don't say no. Isn't it
+warm? I feel just like Mariana in her moated grange--or was it a
+range?--it's hot enough."
+
+"No, there's no news to tell, I believe," said Goodwin, with a
+mischievous look in his eye, "except that old Geddie is getting
+grumpier and crosser every day. If something doesn't happen to
+relieve his mind I'll have to quit smoking on his back porch--and
+there's no other place available that is cool enough."
+
+"He isn't grumpy," said Paula Brannigan, impulsively, "when he--"
+
+But she ceased suddenly, and drew back with a deepening colour; for
+her mother had been a _mestizo_ lady, and the Spanish blood had
+brought to Paula a certain shyness that was an adornment to the other
+half of her demonstrative nature.
+
+
+
+
+II
+
+THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE
+
+
+Willard Geddie, consul for the United States in Coralio, was working
+leisurely on his yearly report. Goodwin, who had strolled in as he
+did daily for a smoke on the much coveted porch, had found him so
+absorbed in his work that he departed after roundly abusing the
+consul for his lack of hospitality.
+
+"I shall complain to the civil service department," said
+Goodwin;--"or is it a department?--perhaps it's only a theory. One
+gets neither civility nor service from you. You won't talk; and
+you won't set out anything to drink. What kind of a way is that of
+representing your government?"
+
+Goodwin strolled out and across to the hotel to see if he could bully
+the quarantine doctor into a game on Coralio's solitary billiard
+table. His plans were completed for the interception of the fugitives
+from the capital; and now it was but a waiting game that he had to
+play.
+
+The consul was interested in his report. He was only twenty-four; and
+he had not been in Coralio long enough for his enthusiasm to cool in
+the heat of the tropics--a paradox that may be allowed between Cancer
+and Capricorn.
+
+So many thousand bunches of bananas, so many thousand oranges and
+cocoanuts, so many ounces of gold dust, pounds of rubber, coffee,
+indigo and sarsaparilla--actually, exports were twenty per cent.
+greater than for the previous year!
+
+A little thrill of satisfaction ran through the consul. Perhaps, he
+thought, the State Department, upon reading his introduction, would
+notice--and then he leaned back in his chair and laughed. He was
+getting as bad as the others. For the moment he had forgotten that
+Coralio was an insignificant town in an insignificant republic lying
+along the by-ways of a second-rate sea. He thought of Gregg, the
+quarantine doctor, who subscribed for the London _Lancet_, expecting
+to find it quoting his reports to the home Board of Health concerning
+the yellow fever germ. The consul knew that not one in fifty of his
+acquaintances in the States had ever heard of Coralio. He knew that
+two men, at any rate, would have to read his report--some underling
+in the State Department and a compositor in the Public Printing
+Office. Perhaps the typesticker would note the increase of commerce
+in Coralio, and speak of it, over the cheese and beer, to a friend.
+
+He had just written: "Most unaccountable is the supineness of the
+large exporters in the United States in permitting the French and
+German houses to practically control the trade interests of this
+rich and productive country"--when he heard the hoarse notes of a
+steamer's siren.
+
+Geddie laid down his pen and gathered his Panama hat and umbrella. By
+the sound he knew it to be the _Valhalla_, one of the line of fruit
+vessels plying for the Vesuvius Company. Down to _nios_ of five
+years, everyone in Coralio could name you each incoming steamer by
+the note of her siren.
+
+The consul sauntered by a roundabout, shaded way to the beach. By
+reason of long practice he gauged his stroll so accurately that
+by the time he arrived on the sandy shore the boat of the customs
+officials was rowing back from the steamer, which had been boarded
+and inspected according to the laws of Anchuria.
+
+There is no harbour at Coralio. Vessels of the draught of the
+_Valhalla_ must ride at anchor a mile from shore. When they take on
+fruit it is conveyed on lighters and freighter sloops. At Solitas,
+where there was a fine harbour, ships of many kinds were to be seen,
+but in the roadstead off Coralio scarcely any save the fruiters
+paused. Now and then a tramp coaster, or a mysterious brig from
+Spain, or a saucy French barque would hang innocently for a few
+days in the offing. Then the custom-house crew would become doubly
+vigilant and wary. At night a sloop or two would be making strange
+trips in and out along the shore; and in the morning the stock of
+Three-Star Hennessey, wines and drygoods in Coralio would be found
+vastly increased. It has also been said that the customs officials
+jingled more silver in the pockets of their red-striped trousers, and
+that the record books showed no increase in import duties received.
+
+The customs boat and the _Valhalla_ gig reached the shore at the same
+time. When they grounded in the shallow water there was still five
+yards of rolling surf between them and dry sand. Then half-clothed
+Caribs dashed into the water, and brought in on their backs the
+_Valhalla's_ purser and the little native officials in their cotton
+undershirts, blue trousers with red stripes, and flapping straw hats.
+
+At college Geddie had been a treasure as a first-baseman. He now
+closed his umbrella, stuck it upright in the sand, and stooped,
+with his hands resting upon his knees. The purser, burlesquing
+the pitcher's contortions, hurled at the consul the heavy roll of
+newspapers, tied with a string, that the steamer always brought for
+him. Geddie leaped high and caught the roll with a sounding "thwack."
+The loungers on the beach--about a third of the population of the
+town--laughed and applauded delightedly. Every week they expected to
+see that roll of papers delivered and received in that same manner,
+and they were never disappointed. Innovations did not flourish in
+Coralio.
+
+The consul re-hoisted his umbrella and walked back to the consulate.
+
+This home of a great nation's representative was a wooden structure
+of two rooms, with a native-built gallery of poles, bamboo and
+nipa palm running on three sides of it. One room was the official
+apartment, furnished chastely with a flat-top desk, a hammock, and
+three uncomfortable cane-seated chairs. Engravings of the first and
+latest president of the country represented hung against the wall.
+The other room was the consul's living apartment.
+
+It was eleven o'clock when he returned from the beach, and therefore
+breakfast time. Chanca, the Carib woman who cooked for him, was just
+serving the meal on the side of the gallery facing the sea--a spot
+famous as the coolest in Coralio. The breakfast consisted of shark's
+fin soup, stew of land crabs, breadfruit, a boiled iguana steak,
+aguacates, a freshly cut pineapple, claret and coffee.
+
+Geddie took his seat, and unrolled with luxurious laziness his bundle
+of newspapers. Here in Coralio for two days or longer he would read
+of goings-on in the world very much as we of the world read those
+whimsical contributions to inexact science that assume to portray the
+doings of the Martians. After he had finished with the papers they
+would be sent on the rounds of the other English-speaking residents
+of the town.
+
+The paper that came first to his hand was one of those bulky
+mattresses of printed stuff upon which the readers of certain New
+York journals are supposed to take their Sabbath literary nap.
+Opening this the consul rested it upon the table, supporting its
+weight with the aid of the back of a chair. Then he partook of his
+meal deliberately, turning the leaves from time to time and glancing
+half idly at the contents.
+
+Presently he was struck by something familiar to him in a picture--a
+half-page, badly printed reproduction of a photograph of a vessel.
+Languidly interested, he leaned for a nearer scrutiny and a view of
+the florid headlines of the column next to the picture.
+
+Yes; he was not mistaken. The engraving was of the eight-hundred-ton
+yacht _Idalia_, belonging to "that prince of good fellows, Midas
+of the money market, and society's pink of perfection, J. Ward
+Tolliver."
+
+Slowly sipping his black coffee, Geddie read the column of print.
+Following a listed statement of Mr. Tolliver's real estate and bonds,
+came a description of the yacht's furnishings, and then the grain of
+news no bigger than a mustard seed. Mr. Tolliver, with a party of
+favoured guests, would sail the next day on a six weeks' cruise along
+the Central American and South American coasts and among the Bahama
+Islands. Among the guests were Mrs. Cumberland Payne and Miss Ida
+Payne, of Norfolk.
+
+The writer, with the fatuous presumption that was demanded of him
+by his readers, had concocted a romance suited to their palates.
+He bracketed the names of Miss Payne and Mr. Tolliver until he had
+well-nigh read the marriage ceremony over them. He played coyly and
+insinuatingly upon the strings of "_on dit_" and "Madame Rumour"
+and "a little bird" and "no one would be surprised," and ended with
+congratulations.
+
+Geddie, having finished his breakfast, took his papers to the edge of
+the gallery, and sat there in his favourite steamer chair with his
+feet on the bamboo railing. He lighted a cigar, and looked out upon
+the sea. He felt a glow of satisfaction at finding he was so little
+disturbed by what he had read. He told himself that he had conquered
+the distress that had sent him, a voluntary exile, to this far
+land of the lotus. He could never forget Ida, of course; but there
+was no longer any pain in thinking about her. When they had had
+that misunderstanding and quarrel he had impulsively sought this
+consulship, with the desire to retaliate upon her by detaching
+himself from her world and presence. He had succeeded thoroughly in
+that. During the twelve months of his life in Coralio no word had
+passed between them, though he had sometimes heard of her through the
+dilatory correspondence with the few friends to whom he still wrote.
+Still he could not repress a little thrill of satisfaction at knowing
+that she had not yet married Tolliver or anyone else. But evidently
+Tolliver had not yet abandoned hope.
+
+Well, it made no difference to him now. He had eaten of the lotus. He
+was happy and content in this land of perpetual afternoon. Those old
+days of life in the States seemed like an irritating dream. He hoped
+Ida would be as happy as he was. The climate as balmy as that of
+distant Avalon; the fetterless, idyllic round of enchanted days;
+the life among this indolent, romantic people--a life full of music,
+flowers, and low laughter; the influence of the imminent sea and
+mountains, and the many shapes of love and magic and beauty that
+bloomed in the white tropic nights--with all he was more than
+content. Also, there was Paula Brannigan.
+
+Geddie intended to marry Paula--if, of course, she would consent;
+but he felt rather sure that she would do that. Somehow, he kept
+postponing his proposal. Several times he had been quite near to it;
+but a mysterious something always held him back. Perhaps it was only
+the unconscious, instinctive conviction that the act would sever the
+last tie that bound him to his old world.
+
+He could be very happy with Paula. Few of the native girls could be
+compared with her. She had attended a convent school in New Orleans
+for two years; and when she chose to display her accomplishments no
+one could detect any difference between her and the girls of Norfolk
+and Manhattan. But it was delicious to see her at home dressed, as
+she sometimes was, in the native costume, with bare shoulders and
+flowing sleeves.
+
+Bernard Brannigan was the great merchant of Coralio. Besides his
+store, he maintained a train of pack mules, and carried on a lively
+trade with the interior towns and villages. He had married a native
+lady of high Castilian descent, but with a tinge of Indian brown
+showing through her olive cheek. The union of the Irish and the
+Spanish had produced, as it so often has, an offshoot of rare beauty
+and variety. They were very excellent people indeed, and the upper
+story of their house was ready to be placed at the service of Geddie
+and Paula as soon as he should make up his mind to speak about it.
+
+By the time two hours were whiled away the consul tired of reading.
+The papers lay scattered about him on the gallery. Reclining there,
+he gazed dreamily out upon an Eden. A clump of banana plants
+interposed their broad shields between him and the sun. The gentle
+slope from the consulate to the sea was covered with the dark-green
+foliage of lemon-trees and orange-trees just bursting into bloom. A
+lagoon pierced the land like a dark, jagged crystal, and above it a
+pale ceiba-tree rose almost to the clouds. The waving cocoanut palms
+on the beach flared their decorative green leaves against the slate
+of an almost quiescent sea. His senses were cognizant of brilliant
+scarlet and ochres amid the vert of the coppice, of odours of
+fruit and bloom and the smoke from Chanca's clay oven under the
+calabash-tree; of the treble laughter of the native women in their
+huts, the song of the robin, the salt taste of the breeze, the
+diminuendo of the faint surf running along the shore--and, gradually,
+of a white speck, growing to a blur, that intruded itself upon the
+drab prospect of the sea.
+
+Lazily interested, he watched this blur increase until it became
+the _Idalia_ steaming at full speed, coming down the coast. Without
+changing his position he kept his eyes upon the beautiful white yacht
+as she drew swiftly near, and came opposite to Coralio. Then, sitting
+upright, he saw her float steadily past and on. Scarcely a mile of
+sea had separated her from the shore. He had seen the frequent flash
+of her polished brass work and the stripes of her deck-awnings--so
+much, and no more. Like a ship on a magic lantern slide the _Idalia_
+had crossed the illuminated circle of the consul's little world, and
+was gone. Save for the tiny cloud of smoke that was left hanging
+over the brim of the sea, she might have been an immaterial thing, a
+chimera of his idle brain.
+
+Geddie went into his office and sat down to dawdle over his report.
+If the reading of the article in the paper had left him unshaken,
+this silent passing of the _Idalia_ had done for him still more.
+It had brought the calm and peace of a situation from which all
+uncertainty had been erased. He knew that men sometimes hope without
+being aware of it. Now, since she had come two thousand miles and had
+passed without a sign, not even his unconscious self need cling to
+the past any longer.
+
+After dinner, when the sun was low behind the mountains, Geddie
+walked on the little strip of beach under the cocoanuts. The wind was
+blowing mildly landward, and the surface of the sea was rippled by
+tiny wavelets.
+
+A miniature breaker, spreading with a soft "swish" upon the sand
+brought with it something round and shiny that rolled back again as
+the wave receded. The next influx beached it clear, and Geddie picked
+it up. The thing was a long-necked wine bottle of colourless glass.
+The cork had been driven in tightly to the level of the mouth, and
+the end covered with dark-red sealing-wax. The bottle contained only
+what seemed to be a sheet of paper, much curled from the manipulation
+it had undergone while being inserted. In the sealing-wax was the
+impression of a seal--probably of a signet-ring, bearing the initials
+of a monogram; but the impression had been hastily made, and the
+letters were past anything more certain than a shrewd conjecture. Ida
+Payne had always worn a signet-ring in preference to any other finger
+decoration. Geddie thought he could make out the familiar "I P"; and
+a queer sensation of disquietude went over him. More personal and
+intimate was this reminder of her than had been the sight of the
+vessel she was doubtless on. He walked back to his house, and set the
+bottle on his desk.
+
+Throwing off his hat and coat, and lighting a lamp--for the night had
+crowded precipitately upon the brief twilight--he began to examine
+his piece of sea salvage.
+
+By holding the bottle near the light and turning it judiciously, he
+made out that it contained a double sheet of note-paper filled with
+close writing; further, that the paper was of the same size and shade
+as that always used by Ida; and that, to the best of his belief, the
+handwriting was hers. The imperfect glass of the bottle so distorted
+the rays of light that he could read no word of the writing; but
+certain capital letters, of which he caught comprehensive glimpses,
+were Ida's, he felt sure.
+
+There was a little smile both of perplexity and amusement in Geddie's
+eyes as he set the bottle down, and laid three cigars side by side
+on his desk. He fetched his steamer chair from the gallery, and
+stretched himself comfortably. He would smoke those three cigars
+while considering the problem.
+
+For it amounted to a problem. He almost wished that he had not found
+the bottle; but the bottle was there. Why should it have drifted in
+from the sea, whence come so many disquieting things, to disturb his
+peace?
+
+In this dreamy land, where time seemed so redundant, he had fallen
+into the habit of bestowing much thought upon even trifling matters.
+
+He began to speculate upon many fanciful theories concerning the
+story of the bottle, rejecting each in turn.
+
+Ships in danger of wreck or disablement sometimes cast forth such
+precarious messengers calling for aid. But he had seen the _Idalia_
+not three hours before, safe and speeding. Suppose the crew had
+mutinied and imprisoned the passengers below, and the message was
+one begging for succour! But, premising such an improbable outrage,
+would the agitated captives have taken the pains to fill four pages
+of note-paper with carefully penned arguments to their rescue.
+
+Thus by elimination he soon rid the matter of the more unlikely
+theories, and was reduced--though aversely--to the less assailable
+one that the bottle contained a message to himself. Ida knew he was
+in Coralio; she must have launched the bottle while the yacht was
+passing and the wind blowing fairly toward the shore.
+
+As soon as Geddie reached this conclusion a wrinkle came between his
+brows and a stubborn look settled around his mouth. He sat looking
+out through the doorway at the gigantic fire-flies traversing the
+quiet streets.
+
+If this was a message to him from Ida, what could it mean save an
+overture toward a reconciliation? And if that, why had she not used
+the same methods of the post instead of this uncertain and even
+flippant means of communication? A note in an empty bottle, cast into
+the sea! There was something light and frivolous about it, if not
+actually contemptuous.
+
+The thought stirred his pride and subdued whatever emotions had been
+resurrected by the finding of the bottle.
+
+Geddie put on his coat and hat and walked out. He followed a street
+that led him along the border of the little plaza where a band was
+playing and people were rambling, care-free and indolent. Some
+timorous _seoritas_ scurrying past with fire-flies tangled in the
+jetty braids of their hair glanced at him with shy, flattering eyes.
+The air was languorous with the scent of jasmin and orange-blossoms.
+
+The consul stayed his steps at the house of Bernard Brannigan. Paula
+was swinging in a hammock on the gallery. She rose from it like a
+bird from its nest. The colour came to her cheek at the sound of
+Geddie's voice.
+
+He was charmed at the sight of her costume--a flounced muslin dress,
+with a little jacket of white flannel, all made with neatness and
+style. He suggested a stroll, and they walked out to the old Indian
+well on the hill road. They sat on the curb, and there Geddie made
+the expected but long-deferred speech. Certain though he had been
+that she would not say him nay, he was thrilled with joy at the
+completeness and sweetness of her surrender. Here was surely a heart
+made for love and steadfastness. Here was no caprice or questionings
+or captious standards of convention.
+
+When Geddie kissed Paula at her door that night he was happier than
+he had ever been before. "Here in this hollow lotus land, ever to
+live and lie reclined" seemed to him, as it has seemed to many
+mariners, the best as well as the easiest. His future would be an
+ideal one. He had attained a Paradise without a serpent. His Eve
+would be indeed a part of him, unbeguiled, and therefore more
+beguiling. He had made his decision to-night, and his heart was full
+of serene, assured content.
+
+Geddie went back to his house whistling that finest and saddest love
+song, "La Golondrina." At the door his tame monkey leaped down from
+his shelf, chattering briskly. The consul turned to his desk to get
+him some nuts he usually kept there. Reaching in the half-darkness,
+his hand struck against the bottle. He started as if he had touched
+the cold rotundity of a serpent.
+
+He had forgotten that the bottle was there.
+
+He lighted the lamp and fed the monkey. Then, very deliberately, he
+lighted a cigar, and took the bottle in his hand, and walked down the
+path to the beach.
+
+There was a moon, and the sea was glorious. The breeze had shifted,
+as it did each evening, and was now rushing steadily seaward.
+
+Stepping to the water's edge, Geddie hurled the unopened bottle far
+out into the sea. It disappeared for a moment, and then shot upward
+twice its length. Geddie stood still, watching it. The moonlight was
+so bright that he could see it bobbing up and down with the little
+waves. Slowly it receded from the shore, flashing and turning as it
+went. The wind was carrying it out to sea. Soon it became a mere
+speck, doubtfully discerned at irregular intervals; and then the
+mystery of it was swallowed up by the greater mystery of the ocean.
+Geddie stood still upon the beach, smoking and looking out upon the
+water.
+
+
+
+"Simon!--Oh, Simon!--wake up there, Simon!" bawled a sonorous voice
+at the edge of the water.
+
+Old Simon Cruz was a half-breed fisherman and smuggler who lived in a
+hut on the beach. Out of his earliest nap Simon was thus awakened.
+
+He slipped on his shoes and went outside. Just landing from one of
+the _Valhalla's_ boats was the third mate of that vessel, who was an
+acquaintance of Simon's, and three sailors from the fruiter.
+
+"Go up, Simon," called the mate, "and find Dr. Gregg or Mr. Goodwin
+or anybody that's a friend to Mr. Geddie, and bring 'em here at
+once."
+
+"Saints of the skies!" said Simon, sleepily, "nothing has happened to
+Mr. Geddie?"
+
+"He's under that tarpauling," said the mate, pointing to the boat,
+"and he's rather more than half drownded. We seen him from the
+steamer nearly a mile out from shore, swimmin' like mad after a
+bottle that was floatin' in the water, outward bound. We lowered the
+gig and started for him. He nearly had his hand on the bottle, when
+he gave out and went under. We pulled him out in time to save him,
+maybe; but the doctor is the one to decide that."
+
+"A bottle?" said the old man, rubbing his eyes. He was not yet fully
+awake. "Where is the bottle?"
+
+"Driftin' along out there some'eres," said the mate, jerking his
+thumb toward the sea. "Get on with you, Simon."
+
+
+
+
+III
+
+SMITH
+
+
+Goodwin and the ardent patriot, Zavalla, took all the precautions
+that their foresight could contrive to prevent the escape of
+President Miraflores and his companion. They sent trusted messengers
+up the coast to Solitas and Alazan to warn the local leaders of the
+flight, and to instruct them to patrol the water line and arrest
+the fugitives at all hazards should they reveal themselves in that
+territory. After this was done there remained only to cover the
+district about Coralio and await the coming of the quarry. The nets
+were well spread. The roads were so few, the opportunities for
+embarkation so limited, and the two or three probable points of exit
+so well guarded that it would be strange indeed if there should slip
+through the meshes so much of the country's dignity, romance, and
+collateral. The president would, without doubt, move as secretly
+as possible, and endeavour to board a vessel by stealth from some
+secluded point along the shore.
+
+On the fourth day after the receipt of Englehart's telegram the
+_Karlsefin_, a Norwegian steamer chartered by the New Orleans fruit
+trade, anchored off Coralio with three hoarse toots of her siren. The
+_Karlsefin_ was not one of the line operated by the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company. She was something of a dilettante, doing odd jobs for a
+company that was scarcely important enough to figure as a rival to
+the Vesuvius. The movements of the _Karlsefin_ were dependent upon
+the state of the market. Sometimes she would ply steadily between the
+Spanish Main and New Orleans in the regular transport of fruit; next
+she would be making erratic trips to Mobile or Charleston, or even
+as far north as New York, according to the distribution of the fruit
+supply.
+
+Goodwin lounged upon the beach with the usual crowd of idlers that
+had gathered to view the steamer. Now that President Miraflores might
+be expected to reach the borders of his abjured country at any time,
+the orders were to keep a strict and unrelenting watch. Every vessel
+that approached the shores might now be considered a possible means
+of escape for the fugitives; and an eye was kept even on the sloops
+and dories that belonged to the sea-going contingent of Coralio.
+Goodwin and Zavalla moved everywhere, but without ostentation,
+watching the loopholes of escape.
+
+The customs officials crowded importantly into their boat and rowed
+out to the _Karlsefin_. A boat from the steamer landed her purser
+with his papers, and took out the quarantine doctor with his green
+umbrella and clinical thermometer. Next a swarm of Caribs began to
+load upon lighters the thousands of bunches of bananas heaped upon
+the shore and row them out to the steamer. The _Karlsefin_ had
+no passenger list, and was soon done with the attention of the
+authorities. The purser declared that the steamer would remain at
+anchor until morning, taking on her fruit during the night. The
+_Karlsefin_ had come, he said, from New York, to which port her
+latest load of oranges and cocoanuts had been conveyed. Two or three
+of the freighter sloops were engaged to assist in the work, for the
+captain was anxious to make a quick return in order to reap the
+advantage offered by a certain dearth of fruit in the States.
+
+About four o'clock in the afternoon another of those marine monsters,
+not very familiar in those waters, hove in sight, following the
+fateful _Idalia_--a graceful steam yacht, painted a light buff,
+clean-cut as a steel engraving. The beautiful vessel hovered off
+shore, see-sawing the waves as lightly as a duck in a rain barrel.
+A swift boat manned by a crew in uniform came ashore, and a
+stocky-built man leaped to the sands.
+
+The new-comer seemed to turn a disapproving eye upon the rather
+motley congregation of native Anchurians, and made his way at once
+toward Goodwin, who was the most conspicuously Anglo-Saxon figure
+present. Goodwin greeted him with courtesy.
+
+Conversation developed that the newly landed one was named Smith,
+and that he had come in a yacht. A meagre biography, truly; for the
+yacht was most apparent; and the "Smith" not beyond a reasonable
+guess before the revelation. Yet to the eye of Goodwin, who had seen
+several things, there was a discrepancy between Smith and his yacht.
+A bullet-headed man Smith was, with an oblique, dead eye and the
+moustache of a cocktail-mixer. And unless he had shifted costumes
+before putting off for shore he had affronted the deck of his correct
+vessel clad in a pearl-gray derby, a gay plaid suit and vaudeville
+neckwear. Men owning pleasure yachts generally harmonize better with
+them.
+
+Smith looked business, but he was no advertiser. He commented upon
+the scenery, remarking upon its fidelity to the pictures in the
+geography; and then inquired for the United States consul. Goodwin
+pointed out the starred-and-striped bunting hanging above the little
+consulate, which was concealed behind the orange-trees.
+
+"Mr. Geddie, the consul, will be sure to be there," said Goodwin. "He
+was very nearly drowned a few days ago while taking a swim in the
+sea, and the doctor has ordered him to remain indoors for some time."
+
+Smith plowed his way through the sand to the consulate, his
+haberdashery creating violent discord against the smooth tropical
+blues and greens.
+
+Geddie was lounging in his hammock, somewhat pale of face and languid
+in pose. On that night when the _Valhalla's_ boat had brought him
+ashore apparently drenched to death by the sea, Doctor Gregg and his
+other friends had toiled for hours to preserve the little spark of
+life that remained to him. The bottle, with its impotent message, was
+gone out to sea, and the problem that it had provoked was reduced
+to a simple sum in addition--one and one make two, by the rule of
+arithmetic; one by the rule of romance.
+
+There is a quaint old theory that man may have two souls--a
+peripheral one which serves ordinarily, and a central one which is
+stirred only at certain times, but then with activity and vigour.
+While under the domination of the former a man will shave, vote, pay
+taxes, give money to his family, buy subscription books and comport
+himself on the average plan. But let the central soul suddenly become
+dominant, and he may, in the twinkling of an eye, turn upon the
+partner of his joys with furious execration; he may change his
+politics while you could snap your fingers; he may deal out deadly
+insult to his dearest friend; he may get him, instanter, to a
+monastery or a dance hall; he may elope, or hang himself--or he may
+write a song or poem, or kiss his wife unasked, or give his funds to
+the search of a microbe. Then the peripheral soul will return; and we
+have our safe, sane citizen again. It is but the revolt of the Ego
+against Order; and its effect is to shake up the atoms only that they
+may settle where they belong.
+
+Geddie's revulsion had been a mild one--no more than a swim in a
+summer sea after so inglorious an object as a drifting bottle. And
+now he was himself again. Upon his desk, ready for the post, was a
+letter to his government tendering his resignation as consul, to be
+effective as soon as another could be appointed in his place. For
+Bernard Brannigan, who never did things in a half-way manner, was to
+take Geddie at once for a partner in his very profitable and various
+enterprises; and Paula was happily engaged in plans for refurnishing
+and decorating the upper story of the Brannigan house.
+
+The consul rose from his hammock when he saw the conspicuous stranger
+in his door.
+
+"Keep your seat, old man," said the visitor, with an airy wave of his
+large hand. "My name's Smith; and I've come in a yacht. You are the
+consul--is that right? A big, cool guy on the beach directed me here.
+Thought I'd pay my respects to the flag."
+
+"Sit down," said Geddie. "I've been admiring your craft ever since it
+came in sight. Looks like a fast sailer. What's her tonnage?"
+
+"Search me!" said Smith. "I don't know what she weighs in at. But
+she's got a tidy gait. The _Rambler_--that's her name--don't take the
+dust of anything afloat. This is my first trip on her. I'm taking a
+squint along this coast just to get an idea of the countries where
+the rubber and red pepper and revolutions come from. I had no idea
+there was so much scenery down here. Why, Central Park ain't in it
+with this neck of the woods. I'm from New York. They get monkeys, and
+cocoanuts, and parrots down here--is that right?"
+
+"We have them all," said Geddie. "I'm quite sure that our fauna and
+flora would take a prize over Central Park."
+
+"Maybe they would," admitted Smith, cheerfully. "I haven't seen them
+yet. But I guess you've got us skinned on the animal and vegetation
+question. You don't have much travel here, do you?"
+
+"Travel?" queried the consul. "I suppose you mean passengers on the
+steamers. No; very few people land in Coralio. An investor now and
+then--tourists and sight-seers generally go further down the coast to
+one of the larger towns where there is a harbour."
+
+"I see a ship out there loading up with bananas," said Smith. "Any
+passengers come on her?"
+
+"That's the _Karlsefin_," said the consul. "She's a tramp
+fruiter--made her last trip to New York, I believe. No; she brought
+no passengers. I saw her boat come ashore, and there was no one.
+About the only exciting recreation we have here is watching steamers
+when they arrive; and a passenger on one of them generally causes
+the whole town to turn out. If you are going to remain in Coralio
+a while, Mr. Smith, I'll be glad to take you around to meet some
+people. There are four or five American chaps that are good to know,
+besides the native high-fliers."
+
+"Thanks," said the yachtsman, "but I wouldn't put you to the trouble.
+I'd like to meet the guys you speak of, but I won't be here long
+enough to do much knocking around. That cool gent on the beach spoke
+of a doctor; can you tell me where I could find him? The _Rambler_
+ain't quite as steady on her feet as a Broadway hotel; and a fellow
+gets a touch of seasickness now and then. Thought I'd strike the
+croaker for a handful of the little sugar pills, in case I need 'em."
+
+"You will be apt to find Dr. Gregg at the hotel," said the consul.
+"You can see it from the door--it's that two-story building with the
+balcony, where the orange-trees are."
+
+The Hotel de los Estranjeros was a dreary hostelry, in great disuse
+both by strangers and friends. It stood at a corner of the Street of
+the Holy Sepulchre. A grove of small orange-trees crowded against one
+side of it, enclosed by a low, rock wall over which a tall man might
+easily step. The house was of plastered adobe, stained a hundred
+shades of colour by the salt breeze and the sun. Upon its upper
+balcony opened a central door and two windows containing broad
+jalousies instead of sashes.
+
+The lower floor communicated by two doorways with the narrow,
+rock-paved sidewalk. The _pulperia_--or drinking shop--of the
+proprietress, Madama Timotea Ortiz, occupied the ground floor. On the
+bottles of brandy, _anisada_, Scotch "smoke" and inexpensive wines
+behind the little counter the dust lay thick save where the fingers
+of infrequent customers had left irregular prints. The upper story
+contained four or five guest-rooms which were rarely put to their
+destined use. Sometimes a fruit-grower, riding in from his plantation
+to confer with his agent, would pass a melancholy night in the dismal
+upper story; sometimes a minor native official on some trifling
+government quest would have his pomp and majesty awed by Madama's
+sepulchral hospitality. But Madama sat behind her bar content, not
+desiring to quarrel with Fate. If anyone required meat, drink or
+lodging at the Hotel de los Estranjeros they had but to come, and be
+served. _Est bueno._ If they came not, why, then, they came not.
+_Est bueno._
+
+As the exceptional yachtsman was making his way down the precarious
+sidewalk of the Street of the Holy Sepulchre, the solitary permanent
+guest of that decaying hotel sat at its door, enjoying the breeze
+from the sea.
+
+Dr. Gregg, the quarantine physician, was a man of fifty or sixty,
+with a florid face and the longest beard between Topeka and Terra
+del Fuego. He held his position by virtue of an appointment by the
+Board of Health of a seaport city in one of the Southern states.
+That city feared the ancient enemy of every Southern seaport--the
+yellow fever--and it was the duty of Dr. Gregg to examine crew and
+passengers of every vessel leaving Coralio for preliminary symptoms.
+The duties were light, and the salary, for one who lived in Coralio,
+ample. Surplus time there was in plenty; and the good doctor added
+to his gains by a large private practice among the residents of the
+coast. The fact that he did not know ten words of Spanish was no
+obstacle; a pulse could be felt and a fee collected without one being
+a linguist. Add to the description the facts that the doctor had
+a story to tell concerning the operation of trepanning which no
+listener had ever allowed him to conclude, and that he believed
+in brandy as a prophylactic; and the special points of interest
+possessed by Dr. Gregg will have become exhausted.
+
+The doctor had dragged a chair to the sidewalk. He was coatless, and
+he leaned back against the wall and smoked, while he stroked his
+beard. Surprise came into his pale blue eyes when he caught sight of
+Smith in his unusual and prismatic clothes.
+
+"You're Dr. Gregg--is that right?" said Smith, feeling the dog's head
+pin in his tie. "The constable--I mean the consul, told me you hung
+out at this caravansary. My name's Smith; and I came in a yacht.
+Taking a cruise around, looking at the monkeys and pineapple-trees.
+Come inside and have a drink, Doc. This caf looks on the blink, but
+I guess it can set out something wet."
+
+"I will join you, sir, in just a taste of brandy," said Dr. Gregg,
+rising quickly. "I find that as a prophylactic a little brandy is
+almost a necessity in this climate."
+
+As they turned to enter the _pulperia_ a native man, barefoot,
+glided noiselessly up and addressed the doctor in Spanish. He was
+yellowish-brown, like an over-ripe lemon; he wore a cotton shirt and
+ragged linen trousers girded by a leather belt. His face was like an
+animal's, live and wary, but without promise of much intelligence.
+This man jabbered with animation and so much seriousness that it
+seemed a pity that his words were to be wasted.
+
+Dr. Gregg felt his pulse.
+
+"You sick?" he inquired.
+
+"_Mi mujer est enferma en la casa_," said the man, thus endeavouring
+to convey the news, in the only language open to him, that his wife
+lay ill in her palm-thatched hut.
+
+The doctor drew a handful of capsules filled with a white powder from
+his trousers pocket. He counted out ten of them into the native's
+hand, and held up his forefinger impressively.
+
+"Take one," said the doctor, "every two hours." He then held up two
+fingers, shaking them emphatically before the native's face. Next he
+pulled out his watch and ran his finger round its dial twice. Again
+the two fingers confronted the patient's nose. "Two--two--two hours,"
+repeated the doctor.
+
+"_Si, Seor_," said the native, sadly.
+
+He pulled a cheap silver watch from his own pocket and laid it in
+the doctor's hand. "Me bring," said he, struggling painfully with
+his scant English, "other watchy to-morrow." Then he departed
+downheartedly with his capsules.
+
+"A very ignorant race of people, sir," said the doctor, as he slipped
+the watch into his pocket. "He seems to have mistaken my directions
+for taking the physic for the fee. However, it is all right. He owes
+me an account, anyway. The chances are that he won't bring the other
+watch. You can't depend on anything they promise you. About that
+drink, now? How did you come to Coralio, Mr. Smith? I was not aware
+that any boats except the _Karlsefin_ had arrived for some days."
+
+The two leaned against the deserted bar; and Madama set out a bottle
+without waiting for the doctor's order. There was no dust on it.
+
+After they had drank twice Smith said:
+
+"You say there were no passengers on the _Karlsefin_, Doc? Are you
+sure about that? It seems to me I heard somebody down on the beach
+say that there was one or two aboard."
+
+"They were mistaken, sir. I myself went out and put all hands through
+a medical examination, as usual. The _Karlsefin_ sails as soon as she
+gets her bananas loaded, which will be about daylight in the morning,
+and she got everything ready this afternoon. No, sir, there was no
+passenger list. Like that Three-Star? A French schooner landed two
+slooploads of it a month ago. If any customs duties on it went to the
+distinguished republic of Anchuria you may have my hat. If you won't
+have another, come out and let's sit in the cool a while. It isn't
+often we exiles get a chance to talk with somebody from the outside
+world."
+
+The doctor brought out another chair to the sidewalk for his new
+acquaintance. The two seated themselves.
+
+"You are a man of the world," said Dr. Gregg; "a man of travel and
+experience. Your decision in a matter of ethics and, no doubt, on
+the points of equity, ability and professional probity should be of
+value. I would be glad if you will listen to the history of a case
+that I think stands unique in medical annals.
+
+"About nine years ago, while I was engaged in the practice of
+medicine in my native city, I was called to treat a case of contusion
+of the skull. I made the diagnosis that a splinter of bone was
+pressing upon the brain, and that the surgical operation known as
+trepanning was required. However, as the patient was a gentleman of
+wealth and position, I called in for consultation Dr.--"
+
+Smith rose from his chair, and laid a hand, soft with apology, upon
+the doctor's shirt sleeve.
+
+"Say, Doc," he said, solemnly, "I want to hear that story. You've got
+me interested; and I don't want to miss the rest of it. I know it's a
+loola by the way it begins; and I want to tell it at the next meeting
+of the Barney O'Flynn Association, if you don't mind. But I've got
+one or two matters to attend to first. If I get 'em attended to
+in time I'll come right back and hear you spiel the rest before
+bedtime--is that right?"
+
+"By all means," said the doctor, "get your business attended to,
+and then return. I shall wait up for you. You see, one of the most
+prominent physicians at the consultation diagnosed the trouble as a
+blood clot; another said it was an abscess, but I--"
+
+"Don't tell me now, Doc. Don't spoil the story. Wait till I come
+back. I want to hear it as it runs off the reel--is that right?"
+
+The mountains reached up their bulky shoulders to receive the level
+gallop of Apollo's homing steeds, the day died in the lagoons and
+in the shadowed banana groves and in the mangrove swamps, where the
+great blue crabs were beginning to crawl to land for their nightly
+ramble. And it died, at last, upon the highest peaks. Then the brief
+twilight, ephemeral as the flight of a moth, came and went; the
+Southern Cross peeped with its topmost eye above a row of palms,
+and the fire-flies heralded with their torches the approach of
+soft-footed night.
+
+In the offing the _Karlsefin_ swayed at anchor, her lights seeming
+to penetrate the water to countless fathoms with their shimmering,
+lanceolate reflections. The Caribs were busy loading her by means of
+the great lighters heaped full from the piles of fruit ranged upon
+the shore.
+
+On the sandy beach, with his back against a cocoanut-tree and the
+stubs of many cigars lying around him, Smith sat waiting, never
+relaxing his sharp gaze in the direction of the steamer.
+
+The incongruous yachtsman had concentrated his interest upon the
+innocent fruiter. Twice had he been assured that no passengers had
+come to Coralio on board of her. And yet, with a persistence not to
+be attributed to an idling voyager, he had appealed the case to the
+higher court of his own eyesight. Surprisingly like some gay-coated
+lizard, he crouched at the foot of the cocoanut palm, and with the
+beady, shifting eyes of the selfsame reptile, sustained his espionage
+on the _Karlsefin_.
+
+On the white sands a whiter gig belonging to the yacht was drawn up,
+guarded by one of the white-ducked crew. Not far away in a _pulperia_
+on the shore-following Calle Grande three other sailors swaggered
+with their cues around Coralio's solitary billiard-table. The boat
+lay there as if under orders to be ready for use at any moment. There
+was in the atmosphere a hint of expectation, of waiting for something
+to occur, which was foreign to the air of Coralio.
+
+Like some passing bird of brilliant plumage, Smith alights on this
+palmy shore but to preen his wings for an instant and then to fly
+away upon silent pinions. When morning dawned there was no Smith, no
+waiting gig, no yacht in the offing. Smith left no intimation of his
+mission there, no footprints to show where he had followed the trail
+of his mystery on the sands of Coralio that night. He came; he spake
+his strange jargon of the asphalt and the cafs; he sat under the
+cocoanut-tree, and vanished. The next morning Coralio, Smithless,
+ate its fried plantain and said: "The man of pictured clothing went
+himself away." With the _siesta_ the incident passed, yawning, into
+history.
+
+So, for a time, must Smith pass behind the scenes of the play. He
+comes no more to Coralio nor to Doctor Gregg, who sits in vain,
+wagging his redundant beard, waiting to enrich his derelict audience
+with his moving tale of trepanning and jealousy.
+
+But prosperously to the lucidity of these loose pages, Smith shall
+flutter among them again. In the nick of time he shall come to tell
+us why he strewed so many anxious cigar stumps around the cocoanut
+palm that night. This he must do; for, when he sailed away before
+the dawn in his yacht _Rambler_, he carried with him the answer to a
+riddle so big and preposterous that few in Anchuria had ventured even
+to propound it.
+
+
+
+
+IV
+
+CAUGHT
+
+
+The plans for the detention of the flying President Miraflores
+and his companion at the coast line seemed hardly likely to fail.
+Dr. Zavalla himself had gone to the port of Alazan to establish a
+guard at that point. At Solitas the Liberal patriot Varras could be
+depended upon to keep close watch. Goodwin held himself responsible
+for the district about Coralio.
+
+The news of the president's flight had been disclosed to no one in
+the coast towns save trusted members of the ambitious political party
+that was desirous of succeeding to power. The telegraph wire running
+from San Mateo to the coast had been cut far up on the mountain trail
+by an emissary of Zavalla's. Long before this could be repaired and
+word received along it from the capital the fugitives would have
+reached the coast and the question of escape or capture been solved.
+
+Goodwin had stationed armed sentinels at frequent intervals along the
+shore for a mile in each direction from Coralio. They were instructed
+to keep a vigilant lookout during the night to prevent Miraflores
+from attempting to embark stealthily by means of some boat or sloop
+found by chance at the water's edge. A dozen patrols walked the
+streets of Coralio unsuspected, ready to intercept the truant
+official should he show himself there.
+
+Goodwin was very well convinced that no precautions had been
+overlooked. He strolled about the streets that bore such
+high-sounding names and were but narrow, grass-covered lanes, lending
+his own aid to the vigil that had been intrusted to him by Bob
+Englehart.
+
+The town had begun the tepid round of its nightly diversions. A few
+leisurely dandies, clad in white duck, with flowing neckties, and
+swinging slim bamboo canes, threaded the grassy by-ways toward the
+houses of their favoured seoritas. Those who wooed the art of music
+dragged tirelessly at whining concertinas, or fingered lugubrious
+guitars at doors and windows. An occasional soldier from the
+_cuartel_, with flapping straw hat, without coat or shoes, hurried
+by, balancing his long gun like a lance in one hand. From every
+density of the foliage the giant tree frogs sounded their loud and
+irritating clatter. Further out, where the by-ways perished at the
+brink of the jungle, the guttural cries of marauding baboons and the
+coughing of the alligators in the black estuaries fractured the vain
+silence of the wood.
+
+By ten o'clock the streets were deserted. The oil lamps that had
+burned, a sickly yellow, at random corners, had been extinguished
+by some economical civic agent. Coralio lay sleeping calmly between
+toppling mountains and encroaching sea like a stolen babe in the arms
+of its abductors. Somewhere over in that tropical darkness--perhaps
+already threading the profundities of the alluvial lowlands--the high
+adventurer and his mate were moving toward land's end. The game of
+Fox-in-the-Morning should be coming soon to its close.
+
+Goodwin, at his deliberate gait, passed the long, low _cuartel_ where
+Coralio's contingent of Anchuria's military force slumbered, with its
+bare toes pointed heavenward. There was a law that no civilian might
+come so near the headquarters of that citadel of war after nine
+o'clock, but Goodwin was always forgetting the minor statutes.
+
+"_Quin vive?_" shrieked the sentinel, wrestling prodigiously with
+his lengthy musket.
+
+"_Americano_," growled Goodwin, without turning his head, and passed
+on, unhalted.
+
+To the right he turned, and to the left up the street that ultimately
+reached the Plaza Nacional. When within the toss of a cigar stump
+from the intersecting Street of the Holy Sepulchre, he stopped
+suddenly in the pathway.
+
+He saw the form of a tall man, clothed in black and carrying a large
+valise, hurry down the cross-street in the direction of the beach.
+And Goodwin's second glance made him aware of a woman at the man's
+elbow on the farther side, who seemed to urge forward, if not even to
+assist, her companion in their swift but silent progress. They were
+no Coralians, those two.
+
+Goodwin followed at increased speed, but without any of the artful
+tactics that are so dear to the heart of the sleuth. The American was
+too broad to feel the instinct of the detective. He stood as an agent
+for the people of Anchuria, and but for political reasons he would
+have demanded then and there the money. It was the design of his
+party to secure the imperilled fund, to restore it to the treasury
+of the country, and to declare itself in power without bloodshed or
+resistance.
+
+The couple halted at the door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros, and
+the man struck upon the wood with the impatience of one unused to his
+entry being stayed. Madama was long in response; but after a time her
+light showed, the door was opened, and the guests housed.
+
+Goodwin stood in the quiet street, lighting another cigar. In
+two minutes a faint gleam began to show between the slats of the
+jalousies in the upper story of the hotel. "They have engaged rooms,"
+said Goodwin to himself. "So, then, their arrangements for sailing
+have yet to be made."
+
+At that moment there came along one Estebn Delgado, a barber, an
+enemy to existing government, a jovial plotter against stagnation
+in any form. This barber was one of Coralio's saddest dogs, often
+remaining out of doors as late as eleven, post meridian. He was a
+partisan Liberal; and he greeted Goodwin with flatulent importance as
+a brother in the cause. But he had something important to tell.
+
+"What think you, Don Frank!" he cried, in the universal tone of the
+conspirator. "I have to-night shaved _la barba_--what you call the
+'weeskers' of the _Presidente_ himself, of this countree! Consider!
+He sent for me to come. In the poor _casita_ of an old woman he
+awaited me--in a verree leetle house in a dark place. _Carramba!_--el
+Seor Presidente to make himself thus secret and obscured! I think he
+desired not to be known--but, _carajo!_ can you shave a man and not
+see his face? This gold piece he gave me, and said it was to be all
+quite still. I think, Don Frank, there is what you call a chip over
+the bug."
+
+"Have you ever seen President Miraflores before?" asked Goodwin.
+
+"But once," answered Estebn. "He is tall; and he had weeskers,
+verree black and sufficient."
+
+"Was anyone else present when you shaved him?"
+
+"An old Indian woman, Seor, that belonged with the _casa_, and one
+seorita--a ladee of so much beautee!--_ah, Dios!_"
+
+"All right, Estebn," said Goodwin. "It's very lucky that
+you happened along with your tonsorial information. The new
+administration will be likely to remember you for this."
+
+Then in a few words he made the barber acquainted with the crisis
+into which the affairs of the nation had culminated, and instructed
+him to remain outside, keeping watch upon the two sides of the hotel
+that looked upon the street, and observing whether anyone should
+attempt to leave the house by any door or window. Goodwin himself
+went to the door through which the guests had entered, opened it and
+stepped inside.
+
+Madama had returned downstairs from her journey above to see after
+the comfort of her lodgers. Her candle stood upon the bar. She was
+about to take a thimbleful of rum as a solace for having her rest
+disturbed. She looked up without surprise or alarm as her third
+caller entered.
+
+"Ah! it is the Seor Goodwin. Not often does he honour my poor house
+by his presence."
+
+"I must come oftener," said Goodwin, with the Goodwin smile. "I hear
+that your cognac is the best between Belize to the north and Rio to
+the south. Set out the bottle, Madama, and let us have the proof in
+_un vasito_ for each of us."
+
+"My _aguardiente_," said Madama, with pride, "is the best. It grows,
+in beautiful bottles, in the dark places among the banana-trees. _Si,
+Seor._ Only at midnight can they be picked by sailor-men who bring
+them, before daylight comes, to your back door. Good _aguardiente_ is
+a verree difficult fruit to handle, Seor Goodwin."
+
+Smuggling, in Coralio, was much nearer than competition to being the
+life of trade. One spoke of it slyly, yet with a certain conceit,
+when it had been well accomplished.
+
+"You have guests in the house to-night," said Goodwin, laying a
+silver dollar upon the counter.
+
+"Why not?" said Madama, counting the change. "Two; but the smallest
+while finished to arrive. One seor, not quite old, and one seorita
+of sufficient handsomeness. To their rooms they have ascended, not
+desiring the to-eat nor the to-drink. Two rooms--_Numero_ 9 and
+_Numero_ 10."
+
+"I was expecting that gentleman and that lady," said Goodwin. "I have
+important _negocios_ that must be transacted. Will you allow me to
+see them?"
+
+"Why not?" sighed Madama, placidly. "Why should not Seor Goodwin
+ascend and speak to his friends? _Est bueno._ Room _Numero_ 9 and
+room _Numero_ 10."
+
+Goodwin loosened in his coat pocket the American revolver that he
+carried, and ascended the steep, dark stairway.
+
+In the hallway above, the saffron light from a hanging lamp allowed
+him to select the gaudy numbers on the doors. He turned the knob of
+Number 9, entered and closed the door behind him.
+
+If that was Isabel Guilbert seated by the table in that poorly
+furnished room, report had failed to do her charms justice. She
+rested her head upon one hand. Extreme fatigue was signified in every
+line of her figure; and upon her countenance a deep perplexity was
+written. Her eyes were gray-irised, and of that mould that seems to
+have belonged to the orbs of all the famous queens of hearts. Their
+whites were singularly clear and brilliant, concealed above the
+irises by heavy horizontal lids, and showing a snowy line below them.
+Such eyes denote great nobility, vigour, and, if you can conceive of
+it, a most generous selfishness. She looked up when the American
+entered with an expression of surprised inquiry, but without alarm.
+
+Goodwin took off his hat and seated himself, with his characteristic
+deliberate ease, upon a corner of the table. He held a lighted cigar
+between his fingers. He took this familiar course because he was sure
+that preliminaries would be wasted upon Miss Guilbert. He knew her
+history, and the small part that the conventions had played in it.
+
+"Good evening," he said. "Now, madame, let us come to business at
+once. You will observe that I mention no names, but I know who is in
+the next room, and what he carries in that valise. That is the point
+which brings me here. I have come to dictate terms of surrender."
+
+The lady neither moved nor replied, but steadily regarded the cigar
+in Goodwin's hand.
+
+"We," continued the dictator, thoughtfully regarding the neat
+buckskin shoe on his gently swinging foot--"I speak for a
+considerable majority of the people--demand the return of the stolen
+funds belonging to them. Our terms go very little further than that.
+They are very simple. As an accredited spokesman, I promise that our
+interference will cease if they are accepted. Give up the money, and
+you and your companion will be permitted to proceed wherever you
+will. In fact, assistance will be given you in the matter of securing
+a passage by any outgoing vessel you may choose. It is on my personal
+responsibility that I add congratulations to the gentleman in Number
+10 upon his taste in feminine charms."
+
+Returning his cigar to his mouth, Goodwin observed her, and saw that
+her eyes followed it and rested upon it with icy and significant
+concentration. Apparently she had not heard a word he had said. He
+understood, tossed the cigar out the window, and, with an amused
+laugh, slid from the table to his feet.
+
+"That is better," said the lady. "It makes it possible for me to
+listen to you. For a second lesson in good manners, you might now
+tell me by whom I am being insulted."
+
+"I am sorry," said Goodwin, leaning one hand on the table, "that my
+time is too brief for devoting much of it to a course of etiquette.
+Come, now; I appeal to your good sense. You have shown yourself,
+in more than one instance, to be well aware of what is to your
+advantage. This is an occasion that demands the exercise of your
+undoubted intelligence. There is no mystery here. I am Frank Goodwin;
+and I have come for the money. I entered this room at a venture. Had
+I entered the other I would have had it before now. Do you want it in
+words? The gentleman in Number 10 has betrayed a great trust. He has
+robbed his people of a large sum, and it is I who will prevent their
+losing it. I do not say who that gentleman is; but if I should be
+forced to see him and he should prove to be a certain high official
+of the republic, it will be my duty to arrest him. The house is
+guarded. I am offering you liberal terms. It is not absolutely
+necessary that I confer personally with the gentleman in the next
+room. Bring me the valise containing the money, and we will call the
+affair ended."
+
+The lady arose from her chair and stood for a moment, thinking
+deeply.
+
+"Do you live here, Mr. Goodwin?" she asked, presently.
+
+"Yes."
+
+"What is your authority for this intrusion?"
+
+"I am an instrument of the republic. I was advised by wire of the
+movements of the--gentleman in Number 10."
+
+"May I ask you two or three questions? I believe you to be a man more
+apt to be truthful than--timid. What sort of a town is this--Coralio,
+I think they call it?"
+
+"Not much of a town," said Goodwin, smiling. "A banana town, as they
+run. Grass huts, 'dobes, five or six two-story houses, accommodations
+limited, population half-breed Spanish and Indian, Caribs and
+blackamoors. No sidewalks to speak of, no amusements. Rather unmoral.
+That's an offhand sketch, of course."
+
+"Are there any inducements, say in a social or in a business way, for
+people to reside here?"
+
+"Oh, yes," answered Goodwin, smiling broadly. "There are no afternoon
+teas, no hand-organs, no department stores--and there is no
+extradition treaty."
+
+"He told me," went on the lady, speaking as if to herself, and with
+a slight frown, "that there were towns on this coast of beauty and
+importance; that there was a pleasing social order--especially an
+American colony of cultured residents."
+
+"There is an American colony," said Goodwin, gazing at her in some
+wonder. "Some of the members are all right. Some are fugitives
+from justice from the States. I recall two exiled bank presidents,
+one army paymaster under a cloud, a couple of manslayers, and a
+widow--arsenic, I believe, was the suspicion in her case. I myself
+complete the colony, but, as yet, I have not distinguished myself by
+any particular crime."
+
+"Do not lose hope," said the lady, dryly; "I see nothing in your
+actions to-night to guarantee you further obscurity. Some mistake
+has been made; I do not know just where. But _him_ you shall not
+disturb to-night. The journey has fatigued him so that he has fallen
+asleep, I think, in his clothes. You talk of stolen money! I do not
+understand you. Some mistake has been made. I will convince you.
+Remain where you are and I will bring you the valise that you seem to
+covet so, and show it to you."
+
+She moved toward the closed door that connected the two rooms, but
+stopped, and half turned and bestowed upon Goodwin a grave, searching
+look that ended in a quizzical smile.
+
+"You force my door," she said, "and you follow your ruffianly
+behaviour with the basest accusations; and yet"--she hesitated, as if
+to reconsider what she was about to say--"and yet--it is a puzzling
+thing--I am sure there has been some mistake."
+
+She took a step toward the door, but Goodwin stayed her by a light
+touch upon her arm. I have said before that women turned to look at
+him in the streets. He was the viking sort of man, big, good-looking,
+and with an air of kindly truculence. She was dark and proud, glowing
+or pale as her mood moved her. I do not know if Eve were light or
+dark, but if such a woman had stood in the garden I know that the
+apple would have been eaten. This woman was to be Goodwin's fate,
+and he did not know it; but he must have felt the first throes of
+destiny, for, as he faced her, the knowledge of what report named her
+turned bitter in his throat.
+
+"If there has been any mistake," he said, hotly, "it was yours. I do
+not blame the man who has lost his country, his honour, and is about
+to lose the poor consolation of his stolen riches as much as I blame
+you, for, by Heaven! I can very well see how he was brought to it.
+I can understand, and pity him. It is such women as you that strew
+this degraded coast with wretched exiles, that make men forget their
+trusts, that drag--"
+
+The lady interrupted him with a weary gesture.
+
+"There is no need to continue your insults," she said, coldly.
+"I do not understand what you are saying, nor do I know what mad
+blunder you are making; but if the inspection of the contents of
+a gentleman's portmanteau will rid me of you, let us delay it no
+longer."
+
+She passed quickly and noiselessly into the other room, and returned
+with the heavy leather valise, which she handed to the American with
+an air of patient contempt.
+
+Goodwin set the valise quickly upon the table and began to unfasten
+the straps. The lady stood by, with an expression of infinite scorn
+and weariness upon her face.
+
+The valise opened wide to a powerful, sidelong wrench. Goodwin
+dragged out two or three articles of clothing, exposing the bulk of
+its contents--package after package of tightly packed United States
+bank and treasury notes of large denomination. Reckoning from the
+high figures written upon the paper bands that bound them, the total
+must have come closely upon the hundred thousand mark.
+
+Goodwin glanced swiftly at the woman, and saw, with surprise and a
+thrill of pleasure that he wondered at, that she had experienced
+an unmistakable shock. Her eyes grew wide, she gasped, and leaned
+heavily against the table. She had been ignorant, then, he inferred,
+that her companion had looted the government treasury. But why, he
+angrily asked himself, should he be so well pleased to think this
+wandering and unscrupulous singer not so black as report had painted
+her?
+
+A noise in the other room startled them both. The door swung open,
+and a tall, elderly, dark complexioned man, recently shaven, hurried
+into the room.
+
+All the pictures of President Miraflores represent him as the
+possessor of a luxuriant supply of dark and carefully tended
+whiskers; but the story of the barber, Estebn, had prepared Goodwin
+for the change.
+
+The man stumbled in from the dark room, his eyes blinking at the
+lamplight, and heavy from sleep.
+
+"What does this mean?" he demanded in excellent English, with a keen
+and perturbed look at the American--"robbery?"
+
+"Very near it," answered Goodwin. "But I rather think I'm in time to
+prevent it. I represent the people to whom this money belongs, and
+I have come to convey it back to them." He thrust his hand into a
+pocket of his loose, linen coat.
+
+The other man's hand went quickly behind him.
+
+"Don't draw," called Goodwin, sharply; "I've got you covered from my
+pocket."
+
+The lady stepped forward, and laid one hand upon the shoulder of
+her hesitating companion. She pointed to the table. "Tell me the
+truth--the truth," she said, in a low voice. "Whose money is that?"
+
+The man did not answer. He gave a deep, long-drawn sigh, leaned and
+kissed her on the forehead, stepped back into the other room and
+closed the door.
+
+Goodwin foresaw his purpose, and jumped for the door, but the report
+of the pistol echoed as his hand touched the knob. A heavy fall
+followed, and some one swept him aside and struggled into the room of
+the fallen man.
+
+A desolation, thought Goodwin, greater than that derived from
+the loss of cavalier and gold must have been in the heart of the
+enchantress to have wrung from her, in that moment, the cry of one
+turning to the all-forgiving, all-comforting earthly consoler--to
+have made her call out from that bloody and dishonoured room--"Oh,
+mother, mother, mother!"
+
+But there was an alarm outside. The barber, Estebn, at the sound
+of the shot, had raised his voice; and the shot itself had aroused
+half the town. A pattering of feet came up the street, and official
+orders rang out on the still air. Goodwin had a duty to perform.
+Circumstances had made him the custodian of his adopted country's
+treasure. Swiftly cramming the money into the valise, he closed it,
+leaned far out of the window and dropped it into a thick orange-tree
+in the little inclosure below.
+
+
+
+They will tell you in Coralio, as they delight in telling the
+stranger, of the conclusion of that tragic flight. They will tell
+you how the upholders of the law came apace when the alarm was
+sounded--the _Comandante_ in red slippers and a jacket like a head
+waiter's and girded sword, the soldiers with their interminable guns,
+followed by outnumbering officers struggling into their gold lace and
+epaulettes; the barefooted policemen (the only capables in the lot),
+and ruffled citizens of every hue and description.
+
+They say that the countenance of the dead man was marred sadly by the
+effects of the shot; but he was identified as the fallen president
+by both Goodwin and the barber Estebn. On the next morning messages
+began to come over the mended telegraph wire; and the story of the
+flight from the capital was given out to the public. In San Mateo the
+revolutionary party had seized the sceptre of government, without
+opposition, and the _vivas_ of the mercurial populace quickly effaced
+the interest belonging to the unfortunate Miraflores.
+
+They will relate to you how the new government sifted the towns and
+raked the roads to find the valise containing Anchuria's surplus
+capital, which the president was known to have carried with him, but
+all in vain. In Coralio Seor Goodwin himself led the searching party
+which combed that town as carefully as a woman combs her hair; but
+the money was not found.
+
+So they buried the dead man, without honours, back of the town near
+the little bridge that spans the mangrove swamp; and for a _real_ a
+boy will show you his grave. They say that the old woman in whose hut
+the barber shaved the president placed the wooden slab at his head,
+and burned the inscription upon it with a hot iron.
+
+You will hear also that Seor Goodwin, like a tower of strength,
+shielded Doa Isabel Guilbert through those subsequent distressful
+days; and that his scruples as to her past career (if he had any)
+vanished; and her adventuresome waywardness (if she had any) left
+her, and they were wedded and were happy.
+
+The American built a home on a little foothill near the town. It is a
+conglomerate structure of native woods that, exported, would be worth
+a fortune, and of brick, palm, glass, bamboo and adobe. There is a
+paradise of nature about it; and something of the same sort within.
+The natives speak of its interior with hands uplifted in admiration.
+There are floors polished like mirrors and covered with hand-woven
+Indian rugs of silk fibre, tall ornaments and pictures, musical
+instruments and papered walls--"figure-it-to-yourself!" they exclaim.
+
+But they cannot tell you in Coralio (as you shall learn) what became
+of the money that Frank Goodwin dropped into the orange-tree. But
+that shall come later; for the palms are fluttering in the breeze,
+bidding us to sport and gaiety.
+
+
+
+
+V
+
+CUPID'S EXILE NUMBER TWO
+
+
+The United States of America, after looking over its stock of
+consular timber, selected Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood, of
+Dalesburg, Alabama, for a successor to Willard Geddie, resigned.
+
+Without prejudice to Mr. Atwood, it will have to be acknowledged
+that, in this instance, it was the man who sought the office. As with
+the self-banished Geddie, it was nothing less than the artful smiles
+of lovely woman that had driven Johnny Atwood to the desperate
+expedient of accepting office under a despised Federal Government so
+that he might go far, far away and never see again the false, fair
+face that had wrecked his young life. The consulship at Coralio
+seemed to offer a retreat sufficiently removed and romantic enough
+to inject the necessary drama into the pastoral scenes of Dalesburg
+life.
+
+It was while playing the part of Cupid's exile that Johnny added his
+handiwork to the long list of casualties along the Spanish Main by
+his famous manipulation of the shoe market, and his unparalleled feat
+of elevating the most despised and useless weed in his own country
+from obscurity to be a valuable product in international commerce.
+
+The trouble began, as trouble often begins instead of ending, with a
+romance. In Dalesburg there was a man named Elijah Hemstetter, who
+kept a general store. His family consisted of one daughter called
+Rosine, a name that atoned much for "Hemstetter." This young woman
+was possessed of plentiful attractions, so that the young men of the
+community were agitated in their bosoms. Among the more agitated
+was Johnny, the son of Judge Atwood, who lived in the big colonial
+mansion on the edge of Dalesburg.
+
+It would seem that the desirable Rosine should have been pleased to
+return the affection of an Atwood, a name honoured all over the state
+long before and since the war. It does seem that she should have
+gladly consented to have been led into that stately but rather empty
+colonial mansion. But not so. There was a cloud on the horizon, a
+threatening, cumulus cloud, in the shape of a lively and shrewd young
+farmer in the neighbourhood who dared to enter the lists as a rival
+to the high-born Atwood.
+
+One night Johnny propounded to Rosine a question that is considered
+of much importance by the young of the human species. The accessories
+were all there--moonlight, oleanders, magnolias, the mock-bird's
+song. Whether or no the shadow of Pinkney Dawson, the prosperous
+young farmer, came between them on that occasion is not known; but
+Rosine's answer was unfavourable. Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood
+bowed till his hat touched the lawn grass, and went away with his
+head high, but with a sore wound in his pedigree and heart. A
+Hemstetter refuse an Atwood! Zounds!
+
+Among other accidents of that year was a Democratic president. Judge
+Atwood was a warhorse of Democracy. Johnny persuaded him to set the
+wheels moving for some foreign appointment. He would go away--away.
+Perhaps in years to come Rosine would think how true, how faithful
+his love had been, and would drop a tear--maybe in the cream she
+would be skimming for Pink Dawson's breakfast.
+
+The wheels of politics revolved; and Johnny was appointed consul to
+Coralio. Just before leaving he dropped in at Hemstetter's to say
+good-bye. There was a queer, pinkish look about Rosine's eyes; and
+had the two been alone, the United States might have had to cast
+about for another consul. But Pink Dawson was there, of course,
+talking about his 400-acre orchard, and the three-mile alfalfa tract,
+and the 200-acre pasture. So Johnny shook hands with Rosine as coolly
+as if he were only going to run up to Montgomery for a couple of
+days. They had the royal manner when they chose, those Atwoods.
+
+"If you happen to strike anything in the way of a good investment
+down there, Johnny," said Pink Dawson, "just let me know, will you? I
+reckon I could lay my hands on a few extra thousands 'most any time
+for a profitable deal."
+
+"Certainly, Pink," said Johnny, pleasantly. "If I strike anything of
+the sort I'll let you in with pleasure."
+
+So Johnny went down to Mobile and took a fruit steamer for the coast
+of Anchuria.
+
+When the new consul arrived in Coralio the strangeness of the scenes
+diverted him much. He was only twenty-two; and the grief of youth is
+not worn like a garment as it is by older men. It has its seasons
+when it reigns; and then it is unseated for a time by the assertion
+of the keen senses.
+
+Billy Keogh and Johnny seemed to conceive a mutual friendship at
+once. Keogh took the new consul about town and presented him to the
+handful of Americans and the smaller number of French and Germans
+who made up the "foreign" contingent. And then, of course, he had to
+be more formally introduced to the native officials, and have his
+credentials transmitted through an interpreter.
+
+There was something about the young Southerner that the sophisticated
+Keogh liked. His manner was simple almost to boyishness; but he
+possessed the cool carelessness of a man of far greater age and
+experience. Neither uniforms nor titles, red tape nor foreign
+languages, mountains nor sea weighed upon his spirits. He was heir
+to all the ages, an Atwood, of Dalesburg; and you might know every
+thought conceived in his bosom.
+
+Geddie came down to the consulate to explain the duties and workings
+of the office. He and Keogh tried to interest the new consul in their
+description of the work that his government expected him to perform.
+
+"It's all right," said Johnny from the hammock that he had set up as
+the official reclining place. "If anything turns up that has to be
+done I'll let you fellows do it. You can't expect a Democrat to work
+during his first term of holding office."
+
+"You might look over these headings," suggested Geddie, "of the
+different lines of exports you will have to keep account of. The
+fruit is classified; and there are the valuable woods, coffee,
+rubber--"
+
+"That last account sounds all right," interrupted Mr. Atwood. "Sounds
+as if it could be stretched. I want to buy a new flag, a monkey, a
+guitar and a barrel of pineapples. Will that rubber account stretch
+over 'em?"
+
+"That's merely statistics," said Geddie, smiling. "The expense
+account is what you want. It is supposed to have a slight elasticity.
+The 'stationery' items are sometimes carelessly audited by the State
+Department."
+
+"We're wasting our time," said Keogh. "This man was born to hold
+office. He penetrates to the root of the art at one step of his eagle
+eye. The true genius of government shows its hand in every word of
+his speech."
+
+"I didn't take this job with any intention of working," explained
+Johnny, lazily. "I wanted to go somewhere in the world where they
+didn't talk about farms. There are none here, are there?"
+
+"Not the kind you are acquainted with," answered the ex-consul.
+"There is no such art here as agriculture. There never was a plow or
+a reaper within the boundaries of Anchuria."
+
+"This is the country for me," murmured the consul, and immediately he
+fell asleep.
+
+The cheerful tintypist pursued his intimacy with Johnny in spite
+of open charges that he did so to obtain a premption on a seat in
+that coveted spot, the rear gallery of the consulate. But whether
+his designs were selfish or purely friendly, Keogh achieved that
+desirable privilege. Few were the nights on which the two could not
+be found reposing there in the sea breeze, with their heels on the
+railing, and the cigars and brandy conveniently near.
+
+One evening they sat thus, mainly silent, for their talk had dwindled
+before the stilling influence of an unusual night.
+
+There was a great, full moon; and the sea was mother-of-pearl. Almost
+every sound was hushed, for the air was but faintly stirring; and
+the town lay panting, waiting for the night to cool. Offshore lay
+the fruit steamer _Andador_, of the Vesuvius line, full-laden and
+scheduled to sail at six in the morning. There were no loiterers on
+the beach. So bright was the moonlight that the two men could see the
+small pebbles shining on the beach where the gentle surf wetted them.
+
+Then down the coast, tacking close to shore, slowly swam a little
+sloop, white-winged like some snowy sea fowl. Its course lay within
+twenty points of the wind's eye; so it veered in and out again in
+long, slow strokes like the movements of a graceful skater.
+
+Again the tactics of its crew brought it close in shore, this time
+nearly opposite the consulate; and then there blew from the sloop
+clear and surprising notes as if from a horn of elfland. A fairy
+bugle it might have been, sweet and silvery and unexpected, playing
+with spirit the familiar air of "Home, Sweet Home."
+
+It was a scene set for the land of the lotus. The authority of the
+sea and the tropics, the mystery that attends unknown sails, and the
+prestige of drifting music on moonlit waters gave it an anodynous
+charm. Johnny Atwood felt it, and thought of Dalesburg; but as soon
+as Keogh's mind had arrived at a theory concerning the peripatetic
+solo he sprang to the railing, and his ear-rending yawp fractured the
+silence of Coralio like a cannon shot.
+
+"Mel-lin-ger a-hoy!"
+
+The sloop was now on its outward tack; but from it came a clear,
+answering hail:
+
+"Good-bye, Billy . . . go-ing home--bye!"
+
+The _Andador_ was the sloop's destination. No doubt some passenger
+with a sailing permit from some up-the-coast point had come down in
+this sloop to catch the regular fruit steamer on its return trip.
+Like a coquettish pigeon the little boat tacked on its eccentric way
+until at last its white sail was lost to sight against the larger
+bulk of the fruiter's side.
+
+"That's old H. P. Mellinger," explained Keogh, dropping back into his
+chair. "He's going back to New York. He was private secretary of the
+late hot-foot president of this grocery and fruit stand that they
+call a country. His job's over now; and I guess old Mellinger is
+glad."
+
+"Why does he disappear to music, like Zo-zo, the magic queen?" asked
+Johnny. "Just to show 'em that he doesn't care?"
+
+"That noise you heard is a phonograph," said Keogh. "I sold him that.
+Mellinger had a graft in this country that was the only thing of its
+kind in the world. The tooting machine saved it for him once, and he
+always carried it around with him afterward."
+
+"Tell me about it," demanded Johnny, betraying interest.
+
+"I'm no disseminator of narratives," said Keogh. "I can use language
+for purposes of speech; but when I attempt a discourse the words
+come out as they will, and they may make sense when they strike the
+atmosphere, or they may not."
+
+"I want to hear about that graft," persisted Johnny. "You've got
+no right to refuse. I've told you all about every man, woman and
+hitching post in Dalesburg."
+
+"You shall hear it," said Keogh. "I said my instincts of narrative
+were perplexed. Don't you believe it. It's an art I've acquired along
+with many other of the graces and sciences."
+
+
+
+
+VI
+
+THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT
+
+
+"What was this graft?" asked Johnny, with the impatience of the great
+public to whom tales are told.
+
+"'Tis contrary to art and philosophy to give you the information,"
+said Keogh, calmly. "The art of narrative consists in concealing from
+your audience everything it wants to know until after you expose your
+favourite opinions on topics foreign to the subject. A good story is
+like a bitter pill with the sugar coating inside of it. I will begin,
+if you please, with a horoscope located in the Cherokee Nation; and
+end with a moral tune on the phonograph.
+
+"Me and Henry Horsecollar brought the first phonograph to this
+country. Henry was a quarter-breed, quarter-back Cherokee, educated
+East in the idioms of football, and West in contraband whisky, and
+a gentleman, the same as you and me. He was easy and romping in his
+ways; a man about six foot, with a kind of rubber-tire movement. Yes,
+he was a little man about five foot five, or five foot eleven. He was
+what you would call a medium tall man of average smallness. Henry had
+quit college once, and the Muscogee jail three times--the last-named
+institution on account of introducing and selling whisky in the
+territories. Henry Horsecollar never let any cigar stores come up and
+stand behind him. He didn't belong to that tribe of Indians.
+
+"Henry and me met at Texarkana, and figured out this phonograph
+scheme. He had $360 which came to him out of a land allotment in
+the reservation. I had run down from Little Rock on account of a
+distressful scene I had witnessed on the street there. A man stood on
+a box and passed around some gold watches, screw case, stem-winders,
+Elgin movement, very elegant. Twenty bucks they cost you over the
+counter. At three dollars the crowd fought for the tickers. The man
+happened to find a valise full of them handy, and he passed them out
+like putting hot biscuits on a plate. The backs were hard to unscrew,
+but the crowd put its ear to the case, and they ticked mollifying and
+agreeable. Three of these watches were genuine tickers; the rest were
+only kickers. Hey? Why, empty cases with one of them horny black bugs
+that fly around electric lights in 'em. Them bugs kick off minutes
+and seconds industrious and beautiful. So, this man I was speaking
+of cleaned up $288; and then he went away, because he knew that when
+it came time to wind watches in Little Rock an entomologist would be
+needed, and he wasn't one.
+
+"So, as I say, Henry had $360, and I had $288. The idea of
+introducing the phonograph to South America was Henry's; but I took
+to it freely, being fond of machinery of all kinds.
+
+"'The Latin races,' says Henry, explaining easy in the idioms he
+learned at college, 'are peculiarly adapted to be victims of the
+phonograph. They have the artistic temperament. They yearn for music
+and color and gaiety. They give wampum to the hand-organ man and the
+four-legged chicken in the tent when they're months behind with the
+grocery and the bread-fruit tree.'
+
+"'Then,' says I, 'we'll export canned music to the Latins; but I'm
+mindful of Mr. Julius Csar's account of 'em where he says: "_Omnia
+Gallia in tres partes divisa est_;" which is the same as to say, "We
+will need all of our gall in devising means to tree them parties."'
+
+"I hated to make a show of education; but I was disinclined to be
+overdone in syntax by a mere Indian, a member of a race to which we
+owe nothing except the land on which the United States is situated.
+
+"We bought a fine phonograph in Texarkana--one of the best make--and
+half a trunkful of records. We packed up, and took the T. and
+P. for New Orleans. From that celebrated centre of molasses and
+disfranchised coon songs we took a steamer for South America.
+
+"We landed at Solitas, forty miles up the coast from here. 'Twas a
+palatable enough place to look at. The houses were clean and white;
+and to look at 'em stuck around among the scenery they reminded
+you of hard-boiled eggs served with lettuce. There was a block of
+skyscraper mountains in the suburbs; and they kept pretty quiet, like
+they had crept up there and were watching the town. And the sea was
+remarking 'Sh-sh-sh' on the beach; and now and then a ripe cocoanut
+would drop kerblip in the sand; and that was all there was doing.
+Yes, I judge that town was considerably on the quiet. I judge that
+after Gabriel quits blowing his horn, and the car starts, with
+Philadelphia swinging to the last strap, and Pine Gully, Arkansas,
+hanging onto the rear step, this town of Solitas will wake up and ask
+if anybody spoke.
+
+"The captain went ashore with us, and offered to conduct what he
+seemed to like to call the obsequies. He introduced Henry and me to
+the United States Consul, and a roan man, the head of the Department
+of Mercenary and Licentious Dispositions, the way it read upon his
+sign.
+
+"'I touch here again a week from to-day,' says the captain.
+
+"'By that time,' we told him, 'we'll be amassing wealth in the
+interior towns with our galvanized prima donna and correct imitations
+of Sousa's band excavating a march from a tin mine.'
+
+"'Ye'll not,' says the captain. 'Ye'll be hypnotized. Any gentleman
+in the audience who kindly steps upon the stage and looks this
+country in the eye will be converted to the hypothesis that he's but
+a fly in the Elgin creamery. Ye'll be standing knee deep in the surf
+waiting for me, and your machine for making Hamburger steak out of
+the hitherto respected art of music will be playing "There's no place
+like home."'
+
+"Henry skinned a twenty off his roll, and received from the Bureau
+of Mercenary Dispositions a paper bearing a red seal and a dialect
+story, and no change.
+
+"Then we got the consul full of red wine, and struck him for a
+horoscope. He was a thin, youngish kind of man, I should say past
+fifty, sort of French-Irish in his affections, and puffed up with
+disconsolation. Yes, he was a flattened kind of a man, in whom drink
+lay stagnant, inclined to corpulence and misery. Yes, I think he was
+a kind of Dutchman, being very sad and genial in his ways.
+
+"'The marvelous invention,' he says, 'entitled the phonograph, has
+never invaded these shores. The people have never heard it. They
+would not believe it if they should. Simple-hearted children of
+nature, progress has never condemned them to accept the work of a
+can-opener as an overture, and rag-time might incite them to a bloody
+revolution. But you can try the experiment. The best chance you have
+is that the populace may not wake up when you play. There's two
+ways,' says the consul, 'they may take it. They may become inebriated
+with attention, like an Atlanta colonel listening to "Marching
+Through Georgia," or they will get excited and transpose the key of
+the music with an axe and yourselves into a dungeon. In the latter
+case,' says the consul, 'I'll do my duty by cabling to the State
+Department, and I'll wrap the Stars and Stripes around you when you
+come to be shot, and threaten them with the vengeance of the greatest
+gold export and financial reserve nation on earth. The flag is
+full of bullet holes now,' says the consul, 'made in that way.
+Twice before,' says the consul, 'I have cabled our government for a
+couple of gunboats to protect American citizens. The first time the
+Department sent me a pair of gum boots. The other time was when a man
+named Pease was going to be executed here. They referred that appeal
+to the Secretary of Agriculture. Let us now disturb the seor behind
+the bar for a subsequence of the red wine.'
+
+"Thus soliloquized the consul of Solitas to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+
+"But, notwithstanding, we hired a room that afternoon in the Calle de
+los Angeles, the main street that runs along the shore, and put our
+trunks there. 'Twas a good-sized room, dark and cheerful, but small.
+'Twas on a various street, diversified by houses and conservatory
+plants. The peasantry of the city passed to and fro on the fine
+pasturage between the sidewalks. 'Twas, for the world, like an opera
+chorus when the Royal Kafoozlum is about to enter.
+
+"We were rubbing the dust off the machine and getting fixed to
+start business the next day, when a big, fine-looking white man in
+white clothes stopped at the door and looked in. We extended the
+invitations, and he walked inside and sized us up. He was chewing a
+long cigar, and wrinkling his eyes, meditative, like a girl trying to
+decide which dress to wear to the party.
+
+"'New York?' he says to me finally.
+
+"'Originally, and from time to time,' I says. 'Hasn't it rubbed off
+yet?'
+
+"'It's simple,' says he, 'when you know how. It's the fit of the
+vest. They don't cut vests right anywhere else. Coats, maybe, but not
+vests.'
+
+"The white man looks at Henry Horsecollar and hesitates.
+
+"'Injun,' says Henry; 'tame Injun.'
+
+"'Mellinger,' says the man--'Homer P. Mellinger. Boys, you're
+confiscated. You're babes in the wood without a chaperon or referee,
+and it's my duty to start you going. I'll knock out the props and
+launch you proper in the pellucid waters of this tropical mud puddle.
+You'll have to be christened, and if you'll come with me I'll break a
+bottle of wine across your bows, according to Hoyle.'
+
+"Well, for two days Homer P. Mellinger did the honors. That man cut
+ice in Anchuria. He was It. He was the Royal Kafoozlum. If me and
+Henry was babes in the wood, he was a Robin Redbreast from the
+topmost bough. Him and me and Henry Horsecollar locked arms, and
+toted that phonograph around, and had wassail and diversions.
+Everywhere we found doors open we went inside and set the machine
+going, and Mellinger called upon the people to observe the artful
+music and his two lifelong friends, the Seors Americanos. The opera
+chorus was agitated with esteem, and followed us from house to house.
+There was a different kind of drink to be had with every tune. The
+natives had acquirements of a pleasant thing in the way of a drink
+that gums itself to the recollection. They chop off the end of a
+green cocoanut, and pour in on the juice of it French brandy and
+other adjuvants. We had them and other things.
+
+"Mine and Henry's money was counterfeit. Everything was on Homer P.
+Mellinger. That man could find rolls of bills concealed in places
+on his person where Hermann the Wizard couldn't have conjured out a
+rabbit or an omelette. He could have founded universities, and made
+orchid collections, and then had enough left to purchase the colored
+vote of his country. Henry and me wondered what his graft was. One
+evening he told us.
+
+"'Boys,' said he, 'I've deceived you. You think I'm a painted
+butterfly; but in fact I'm the hardest worked man in this country.
+Ten years ago I landed on its shores; and two years ago on the point
+of its jaw. Yes, I guess I can get the decision over this ginger cake
+commonwealth at the end of any round I choose. I'll confide in you
+because you are my countrymen and guests, even if you have assaulted
+my adopted shores with the worst system of noises ever set to music.
+
+"'My job is private secretary to the president of this republic; and
+my duties are running it. I'm not headlined in the bills, but I'm the
+mustard in the salad dressing just the same. There isn't a law goes
+before Congress, there isn't a concession granted, there isn't an
+import duty levied but what H. P. Mellinger he cooks and seasons
+it. In the front office I fill the president's inkstand and search
+visiting statesmen for dirks and dynamite; but in the back room I
+dictate the policy of the government. You'd never guess in the world
+how I got my pull. It's the only graft of its kind on earth. I'll put
+you wise. You remember the old top-liner in the copy book--"Honesty
+is the Best Policy"? That's it. I'm working honesty for a graft. I'm
+the only honest man in the republic. The government knows it; the
+people know it; the boodlers know it; the foreign investors know it.
+I make the government keep its faith. If a man is promised a job he
+gets it. If outside capital buys a concession it gets the goods. I
+run a monopoly of square dealing here. There's no competition. If
+Colonel Diogenes were to flash his lantern in this precinct he'd have
+my address inside of two minutes. There isn't big money in it, but
+it's a sure thing, and lets a man sleep of nights.'
+
+"Thus Homer P. Mellinger made oration to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+And, later, he divested himself of this remark:
+
+"'Boys, I'm to hold a _soire_ this evening with a gang of leading
+citizens, and I want your assistance. You bring the musical corn
+sheller and give the affair the outside appearance of a function.
+There's important business on hand, but it mustn't show. I can talk
+to you people. I've been pained for years on account of not having
+anybody to blow off and brag to. I get homesick sometimes, and I'd
+swap the entire perquisites of office for just one hour to have a
+stein and a caviare sandwich somewhere on Thirty-fourth Street, and
+stand and watch the street cars go by, and smell the peanut roaster
+at old Giuseppe's fruit stand.'
+
+"'Yes,' said I, 'there's fine caviare at Billy Renfrew's caf, corner
+of Thirty-fourth and--'
+
+"'God knows it,' interrupts Mellinger, 'and if you'd told me you knew
+Billy Renfrew I'd have invented tons of ways of making you happy.
+Billy was my side-kicker in New York. There is a man who never knew
+what crooked was. Here I am working Honesty for a graft, but that man
+loses money on it. Carrambos! I get sick at times of this country.
+Everything's rotten. From the executive down to the coffee pickers,
+they're plotting to down each other and skin their friends. If a mule
+driver takes off his hat to an official, that man figures it out that
+he's a popular idol, and sets his pegs to stir up a revolution and
+upset the administration. It's one of my little chores as private
+secretary to smell out these revolutions and affix the kibosh before
+they break out and scratch the paint off the government property.
+That's why I'm down here now in this mildewed coast town. The
+governor of the district and his crew are plotting to uprise. I've
+got every one of their names, and they're invited to listen to the
+phonograph to-night, compliments of H. P. M. That's the way I'll get
+them in a bunch, and things are on the programme to happen to them.'
+
+"We three were sitting at table in the cantina of the Purified
+Saints. Mellinger poured out wine, and was looking some worried; I
+was thinking.
+
+"'They're a sharp crowd,' he says, kind of fretful. 'They're
+capitalized by a foreign syndicate after rubber, and they're loaded
+to the muzzle for bribing. I'm sick,' goes on Mellinger, 'of comic
+opera. I want to smell East River and wear suspenders again. At times
+I feel like throwing up my job, but I'm d----n fool enough to be sort
+of proud of it. "There's Mellinger," they say here. "_Por Dios!_ you
+can't touch him with a million." I'd like to take that record back
+and show it to Billy Renfrew some day; and that tightens my grip
+whenever I see a fat thing that I could corral just by winking one
+eye--and losing my graft. By ----, they can't monkey with me. They
+know it. What money I get I make honest and spend it. Some day I'll
+make a pile and go back and eat caviare with Billy. To-night I'll
+show you how to handle a bunch of corruptionists. I'll show them what
+Mellinger, private secretary, means when you spell it with the cotton
+and tissue paper off.'
+
+"Mellinger appears shaky, and breaks his glass against the neck of
+the bottle.
+
+"I says to myself, 'White man, if I'm not mistaken there's been a
+bait laid out where the tail of your eye could see it.'
+
+"That night, according to arrangements, me and Henry took the
+phonograph to a room in a 'dobe house in a dirty side street, where
+the grass was knee high. 'Twas a long room, lit with smoky oil lamps.
+There was plenty of chairs, and a table at the back end. We set the
+phonograph on the table. Mellinger was there, walking up and down,
+disturbed in his predicaments. He chewed cigars and spat 'em out, and
+he bit the thumb nail of his left hand.
+
+"By and by the invitations to the musicale came sliding in by pairs
+and threes and spade flushes. Their colour was of a diversity,
+running from a three-days' smoked meerschaum to a patent-leather
+polish. They were as polite as wax, being devastated with enjoyments
+to give Seor Mellinger the good evenings. I understood their Spanish
+talk--I ran a pumping engine two years in a Mexican silver mine, and
+had it pat--but I never let on.
+
+"Maybe fifty of 'em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king
+bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door, and
+escorted him to the grand stand. When I saw that Latin man I knew
+that Mellinger, private secretary, had all the dances on his card
+taken. That was a big, squashy man, the colour of a rubber overshoe,
+and he had an eye like a head waiter's.
+
+"Mellinger explained, fluent, in the Castilian idioms, that his soul
+was disconcerted with joy at introducing to his respected friends
+America's greatest invention, the wonder of the age. Henry got the
+cue and run on an elegant brass-band record and the festivities
+became initiated. The governor man had a bit of English under his
+hat, and when the music was choked off he says:
+
+"'Ver-r-ree fine. _Gr-r-r-r-racias_, the American gentleemen, the so
+esplendeed moosic as to playee.'
+
+"The table was a long one, and Henry and me sat at the end of it next
+the wall. The governor sat at the other end. Homer P. Mellinger stood
+at the side of it. I was just wondering how Mellinger was going to
+handle his crowd, when the home talent suddenly opened the services.
+
+"That governor man was suitable for uprisings and policies. I judge
+he was a ready kind of man, who took his own time. Yes, he was full
+of attention and immediateness. He leaned his hands on the table and
+imposed his face toward the secretary man.
+
+"'Do the American seors understand Spanish?' he asks in his native
+accents.
+
+"'They do not,' says Mellinger.
+
+"'Then listen,' goes on the Latin man, prompt. 'The musics are
+of sufficient prettiness, but not of necessity. Let us speak
+of business. I well know why we are here, since I observe my
+compatriots. You had a whisper yesterday, Seor Mellinger, of our
+proposals. To-night we will speak out. We know that you stand in
+the president's favour, and we know your influence. The government
+will be changed. We know the worth of your services. We esteem your
+friendship and aid so much that'--Mellinger raises his hand, but the
+governor man bottles him up. 'Do not speak until I have done.'
+
+"The governor man then draws a package wrapped in paper from his
+pocket, and lays it on the table by Mellinger's hand.
+
+"'In that you will find fifty thousand dollars in money of your
+country. You can do nothing against us, but you can be worth that for
+us. Go back to the capital and obey our instructions. Take that money
+now. We trust you. You will find with it a paper giving in detail the
+work you will be expected to do for us. Do not have the unwiseness to
+refuse.'
+
+"The governor man paused, with his eyes fixed on Mellinger, full of
+expressions and observances. I looked at Mellinger, and was glad
+Billy Renfrew couldn't see him then. The sweat was popping out on his
+forehead, and he stood dumb, tapping the little package with the ends
+of his fingers. The colorado-maduro gang was after his graft. He had
+only to change his politics, and stuff five fingers in his inside
+pocket.
+
+"Henry whispers to me and wants the pause in the programme
+interpreted. I whisper back: 'H. P. is up against a bribe, senator's
+size, and the coons have got him going.' I saw Mellinger's hand
+moving closer to the package. 'He's weakening,' I whispered to
+Henry. 'We'll remind him,' says Henry, 'of the peanut-roaster on
+Thirty-fourth Street, New York.'
+
+"Henry stooped down and got a record from the basketful we'd brought,
+slid it in the phonograph, and started her off. It was a cornet solo,
+very neat and beautiful, and the name of it was 'Home, Sweet Home.'
+Not one of them fifty odd men in the room moved while it was playing,
+and the governor man kept his eyes steady on Mellinger. I saw
+Mellinger's head go up little by little, and his hand came creeping
+away from the package. Not until the last note sounded did anybody
+stir. And then Homer P. Mellinger takes up the bundle of boodle and
+slams it in the governor man's face.
+
+"'That's my answer,' says Mellinger, private secretary, 'and there'll
+be another in the morning. I have proofs of conspiracy against every
+man of you. The show is over, gentlemen.'
+
+"'There's one more act,' puts in the governor man. 'You are a
+servant, I believe, employed by the president to copy letters and
+answer raps at the door. I am governor here. _Seores_, I call upon
+you in the name of the cause to seize this man.'
+
+"That brindled gang of conspirators shoved back their chairs and
+advanced in force. I could see where Mellinger had made a mistake in
+massing his enemy so as to make a grand-stand play. I think he made
+another one, too; but we can pass that, Mellinger's idea of a graft
+and mine being different, according to estimations and points of
+view.
+
+"There was only one window and door in that room, and they were in
+the front end. Here was fifty odd Latin men coming in a bunch to
+obstruct the legislation of Mellinger. You may say there were three
+of us, for me and Henry, simultaneous, declared New York City and the
+Cherokee Nation in sympathy with the weaker party.
+
+"Then it was that Henry Horsecollar rose to a point of disorder
+and intervened, showing, admirable, the advantages of education
+as applied to the American Indian's natural intellect and native
+refinement. He stood up and smoothed back his hair on each side with
+his hands as you have seen little girls do when they play.
+
+"'Get behind me, both of you,' says Henry.
+
+"'What's it to be, chief?' I asked.
+
+"'I'm going to buck centre,' says Henry, in his football idioms.
+'There isn't a tackle in the lot of them. Follow me close, and rush
+the game.'
+
+"Then that cultured Red Man exhaled an arrangement of sounds with
+his mouth that made the Latin aggregation pause, with thoughtfulness
+and hesitations. The matter of his proclamation seemed to be a
+co-operation of the Carlisle war-whoop with the Cherokee college
+yell. He went at the chocolate team like a bean out of a little boy's
+nigger shooter. His right elbow laid out the governor man on the
+gridiron, and he made a lane the length of the crowd so wide that a
+woman could have carried a step-ladder through it without striking
+against anything. All Mellinger and me had to do was to follow.
+
+"It took us just three minutes to get out of that street around to
+military headquarters, where Mellinger had things his own way. A
+colonel and a battalion of bare-toed infantry turned out and went
+back to the scene of the musicale with us, but the conspirator gang
+was gone. But we recaptured the phonograph with honours of war, and
+marched back to the _cuartel_ with it playing 'All Coons Look Alike
+to Me.'
+
+"The next day Mellinger takes me and Henry to one side, and begins to
+shed tens and twenties.
+
+"'I want to buy that phonograph,' says he. 'I liked that last tune it
+played at the _soire_.'
+
+"'This is more money than the machine is worth,' says I.
+
+"''Tis government expense money,' says Mellinger. 'The government
+pays for it, and it's getting the tune-grinder cheap.'
+
+"Me and Henry knew that pretty well. We knew that it had saved Homer
+P. Mellinger's graft when he was on the point of losing it; but we
+never let him know we knew it.
+
+"'Now you boys better slide off further down the coast for a while,'
+says Mellinger, 'till I get the screws put on these fellows here. If
+you don't they'll give you trouble. And if you ever happen to see
+Billy Renfrew again before I do, tell him I'm coming back to New York
+as soon as I can make a stake--honest.'
+
+"Me and Henry laid low until the day the steamer came back. When we
+saw the captain's boat on the beach we went down and stood in the
+edge of the water. The captain grinned when he saw us.
+
+"'I told you you'd be waiting,' he says. 'Where's the Hamburger
+machine?'
+
+"'It stays behind,' I says, 'to play "Home, Sweet Home."'
+
+"'I told you so,' says the captain again. 'Climb in the boat.'
+
+"And that," said Keogh, "is the way me and Henry Horsecollar
+introduced the phonograph into this country. Henry went back to the
+States, but I've been rummaging around in the tropics ever since.
+They say Mellinger never travelled a mile after that without his
+phonograph. I guess it kept him reminded about his graft whenever he
+saw the siren voice of the boodler tip him the wink with a bribe in
+its hand."
+
+"I suppose he's taking it home with him as a souvenir," remarked the
+consul.
+
+"Not as a souvenir," said Keogh. "He'll need two of 'em in New York,
+running day and night."
+
+
+
+
+VII
+
+MONEY MAZE
+
+
+The new administration of Anchuria entered upon its duties and
+privileges with enthusiasm. Its first act was to send an agent to
+Coralio with imperative orders to recover, if possible, the sum of
+money ravished from the treasury by the ill-fated Miraflores.
+
+Colonel Emilio Falcon, the private secretary of Losada, the new
+president, was despatched from the capital upon this important
+mission.
+
+The position of private secretary to a tropical president is a
+responsible one. He must be a diplomat, a spy, a ruler of men, a
+body-guard to his chief, and a smeller-out of plots and nascent
+revolutions. Often he is the power behind the throne, the dictator of
+policy; and a president chooses him with a dozen times the care with
+which he selects a matrimonial mate.
+
+Colonel Falcon, a handsome and urbane gentleman of Castilian courtesy
+and dbonnaire manners, came to Coralio with the task before him of
+striking upon the cold trail of the lost money. There he conferred
+with the military authorities, who had received instructions to
+co-operate with him in the search.
+
+Colonel Falcon established his headquarters in one of the rooms of
+the Casa Morena. Here for a week he held informal sittings--much as
+if he were a kind of unified grand jury--and summoned before him all
+those whose testimony might illumine the financial tragedy that had
+accompanied the less momentous one of the late president's death.
+
+Two or three who were thus examined, among whom was the barber
+Estebn, declared that they had identified the body of the president
+before its burial.
+
+"Of a truth," testified Estebn before the mighty secretary, "it was
+he, the president. Consider!--how could I shave a man and not see his
+face? He sent for me to shave him in a small house. He had a beard
+very black and thick. Had I ever seen the president before? Why not?
+I saw him once ride forth in a carriage from the _vapor_ in Solitas.
+When I shaved him he gave me a gold piece, and said there was to be
+no talk. But I am a Liberal--I am devoted to my country--and I spake
+of these things to Seor Goodwin."
+
+"It is known," said Colonel Falcon, smoothly, "that the late
+President took with him an American leather valise, containing a
+large amount of money. Did you see that?"
+
+"_De veras_--no," Estebn answered. "The light in the little house
+was but a small lamp by which I could scarcely see to shave the
+President. Such a thing there may have been, but I did not see
+it. No. Also in the room was a young lady--a seorita of much
+beauty--that I could see even in so small a light. But the money,
+seor, or the thing in which it was carried--that I did not see."
+
+The _comandante_ and other officers gave testimony that they had been
+awakened and alarmed by the noise of a pistol-shot in the Hotel de
+los Estranjeros. Hurrying thither to protect the peace and dignity of
+the republic, they found a man lying dead, with a pistol clutched in
+his hand. Beside him was a young woman, weeping sorely. Seor Goodwin
+was also in the room when they entered it. But of the valise of money
+they saw nothing.
+
+Madame Timotea Ortiz, the proprietress of the hotel in which the game
+of Fox-in-the-Morning had been played out, told of the coming of the
+two guests to her house.
+
+"To my house they came," said she--"one _seor_, not quite old, and
+one _seorita_ of sufficient handsomeness. They desired not to eat or
+to drink--not even of my _aguardiente_, which is the best. To their
+rooms they ascended--_Numero Nueve_ and _Numero Diez_. Later came
+Seor Goodwin, who ascended to speak with them. Then I heard a
+great noise like that of a _canon_, and they said that the _pobre
+Presidente_ had shot himself. _Est bueno._ I saw nothing of money or
+of the thing you call _veliz_ that you say he carried it in."
+
+Colonel Falcon soon came to the reasonable conclusion that if anyone
+in Coralio could furnish a clue to the vanished money, Frank Goodwin
+must be the man. But the wise secretary pursued a different course in
+seeking information from the American. Goodwin was a powerful friend
+to the new administration, and one who was not to be carelessly
+dealt with in respect to either his honesty or his courage. Even the
+private secretary of His Excellency hesitated to have this rubber
+prince and mahogany baron haled before him as a common citizen of
+Anchuria. So he sent Goodwin a flowery epistle, each word-petal
+dripping with honey, requesting the favour of an interview. Goodwin
+replied with an invitation to dinner at his own house.
+
+Before the hour named the American walked over to the Casa Morena,
+and greeted his guest frankly and friendly. Then the two strolled, in
+the cool of the afternoon, to Goodwin's home in the environs.
+
+The American left Colonel Falcon in a big, cool, shadowed room with a
+floor of inlaid and polished woods that any millionaire in the States
+would have envied, excusing himself for a few minutes. He crossed a
+_patio_, shaded with deftly arranged awnings and plants, and entered
+a long room looking upon the sea in the opposite wing of the house.
+The broad jalousies were opened wide, and the ocean breeze flowed
+in through the room, an invisible current of coolness and health.
+Goodwin's wife sat near one of the windows, making a water-color
+sketch of the afternoon seascape.
+
+Here was a woman who looked to be happy. And more--she looked to be
+content. Had a poet been inspired to pen just similes concerning
+her favour, he would have likened her full, clear eyes, with their
+white-encircled, gray irises, to moonflowers. With none of the
+goddesses whose traditional charms have become coldly classic
+would the discerning rhymester have compared her. She was purely
+Paradisaic, not Olympian. If you can imagine Eve, after the eviction,
+beguiling the flaming warriors and serenely re-entering the Garden,
+you will have her. Just so human, and still so harmonious with Eden
+seemed Mrs. Goodwin.
+
+When her husband entered she looked up, and her lips curved and
+parted; her eyelids fluttered twice or thrice--a movement remindful
+(Poesy forgive us!) of the tail-wagging of a faithful dog--and a
+little ripple went through her like the commotion set up in a weeping
+willow by a puff of wind. Thus she ever acknowledged his coming, were
+it twenty times a day. If they who sometimes sat over their wine
+in Coralio, reshaping old, diverting stories of the madcap career
+of Isabel Guilbert, could have seen the wife of Frank Goodwin that
+afternoon in the estimable aura of her happy wifehood, they might
+have disbelieved, or have agreed to forget, those graphic annals of
+the life of the one for whom their president gave up his country and
+his honour.
+
+"I have brought a guest to dinner," said Goodwin. "One Colonel
+Falcon, from San Mateo. He is come on government business. I do not
+think you will care to see him, so I prescribe for you one of those
+convenient and indisputable feminine headaches."
+
+"He has come to inquire about the lost money, has he not?" asked Mrs.
+Goodwin, going on with her sketch.
+
+"A good guess!" acknowledged Goodwin. "He has been holding an
+inquisition among the natives for three days. I am next on his list
+of witnesses, but as he feels shy about dragging one of Uncle Sam's
+subjects before him, he consents to give it the outward appearance
+of a social function. He will apply the torture over my own wine and
+provender."
+
+"Has he found anyone who saw the valise of money?"
+
+"Not a soul. Even Madama Ortiz, whose eyes are so sharp for the sight
+of a revenue official, does not remember that there was any baggage."
+
+Mrs. Goodwin laid down her brush and sighed.
+
+"I am so sorry, Frank," she said, "that they are giving you so much
+trouble about the money. But we can't let them know about it, can
+we?"
+
+"Not without doing our intelligence a great injustice," said Goodwin,
+with a smile and a shrug that he had picked up from the natives.
+"_Americano_, though I am, they would have me in the _calaboza_ in
+half an hour if they knew we had appropriated that valise. No; we
+must appear as ignorant about the money as the other ignoramuses in
+Coralio."
+
+"Do you think that this man they have sent suspects you?" she asked,
+with a little pucker of her brows.
+
+"He'd better not," said the American, carelessly. "It's lucky that no
+one caught a sight of the valise except myself. As I was in the rooms
+when the shot was fired, it is not surprising that they should want
+to investigate my part in the affair rather closely. But there's no
+cause for alarm. This colonel is down on the list of events for a
+good dinner, with a dessert of American 'bluff' that will end the
+matter, I think."
+
+Mrs. Goodwin rose and walked to the window. Goodwin followed and
+stood by her side. She leaned to him, and rested in the protection of
+his strength, as she had always rested since that dark night on which
+he had first made himself her tower of refuge. Thus they stood for a
+little while.
+
+Straight through the lavish growth of tropical branch and leaf
+and vine that confronted them had been cunningly trimmed a vista,
+that ended at the cleared environs of Coralio, on the banks of the
+mangrove swamp. At the other end of the aerial tunnel they could see
+the grave and wooden headpiece that bore the name of the unhappy
+President Miraflores. From this window when the rains forbade the
+open, and from the green and shady slopes of Goodwin's fruitful
+lands when the skies were smiling, his wife was wont to look upon
+that grave with a gentle sadness that was now scarcely a mar to her
+happiness.
+
+"I loved him so, Frank!" she said, "even after that terrible flight
+and its awful ending. And you have been so good to me, and have made
+me so happy. It has all grown into such a strange puzzle. If they
+were to find out that we got the money do you think they would force
+you to make the amount good to the government?"
+
+"They would undoubtedly try," answered Goodwin. "You are right about
+its being a puzzle. And it must remain a puzzle to Falcon and all
+his countrymen until it solves itself. You and I, who know more than
+anyone else, only know half of the solution. We must not let even a
+hint about this money get abroad. Let them come to the theory that
+the president concealed it in the mountains during his journey, or
+that he found means to ship it out of the country before he reached
+Coralio. I don't think that Falcon suspects me. He is making a close
+investigation, according to his orders, but he will find out
+nothing."
+
+Thus they spake together. Had anyone overheard or overseen them as
+they discussed the lost funds of Anchuria there would have been a
+second puzzle presented. For upon the faces and in the bearing of
+each of them was visible (if countenances are to be believed) Saxon
+honesty and pride and honourable thoughts. In Goodwin's steady eye
+and firm lineaments, moulded into material shape by the inward
+spirit of kindness and generosity and courage, there was nothing
+reconcilable with his words.
+
+As for his wife, physiognomy championed her even in the face of their
+accusive talk. Nobility was in her guise; purity was in her glance.
+The devotion that she manifested had not even the appearance of that
+feeling that now and then inspires a woman to share the guilt of her
+partner out of the pathetic greatness of her love. No, there was a
+discrepancy here between what the eye would have seen and the ear
+have heard.
+
+Dinner was served to Goodwin and his guest in the _patio_, under cool
+foliage and flowers. The American begged the illustrious secretary to
+excuse the absence of Mrs. Goodwin, who was suffering, he said, from
+a headache brought on by a slight _calentura_.
+
+After the meal they lingered, according to the custom, over their
+coffee and cigars. Colonel Falcon, with true Castilian delicacy,
+waited for his host to open the question that they had met to
+discuss. He had not long to wait. As soon as the cigars were lighted,
+the American cleared the way by inquiring whether the secretary's
+investigations in the town had furnished him with any clue to the
+lost funds.
+
+"I have found no one yet," admitted Colonel Falcon, "who even had
+sight of the valise or the money. Yet I have persisted. It has been
+proven in the capital that President Miraflores set out from San
+Mateo with one hundred thousand dollars belonging to the government,
+accompanied by _Seorita_ Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer. The
+Government, officially and personally, is loathe to believe,"
+concluded Colonel Falcon, with a smile, "that our late President's
+tastes would have permitted him to abandon on the route, as excess
+baggage, either of the desirable articles with which his flight was
+burdened."
+
+"I suppose you would like to hear what I have to say about the
+affair," said Goodwin, coming directly to the point. "It will not
+require many words.
+
+"On that night, with others of our friends here, I was keeping a
+lookout for the president, having been notified of his flight by a
+telegram in our national cipher from Englehart, one of our leaders
+in the capital. About ten o'clock that night I saw a man and a
+woman hurrying along the streets. They went to the Hotel de los
+Estranjeros, and engaged rooms. I followed them upstairs, leaving
+Estebn, who had come up, to watch outside. The barber had told me
+that he had shaved the beard from the president's face that night;
+therefore I was prepared, when I entered the rooms, to find him with
+a smooth face. When I apprehended him in the name of the people he
+drew a pistol and shot himself instantly. In a few minutes many
+officers and citizens were on the spot. I suppose you have been
+informed of the subsequent facts."
+
+Goodwin paused. Losada's agent maintained an attitude of waiting, as
+if he expected a continuance.
+
+"And now," went on the American, looking steadily into the eyes of
+the other man, and giving each word a deliberate emphasis, "you will
+oblige me by attending carefully to what I have to add. I saw no
+valise or receptacle of any kind, or any money belonging to the
+Republic of Anchuria. If President Miraflores decamped with any funds
+belonging to the treasury of this country, or to himself, or to
+anyone else, I saw no trace of it in the house or elsewhere, at that
+time or at any other. Does that statement cover the ground of the
+inquiry you wished to make of me?"
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed, and described a fluent curve with his cigar.
+His duty was performed. Goodwin was not to be disputed. He was a
+loyal supporter of the government, and enjoyed the full confidence
+of the new president. His rectitude had been the capital that had
+brought him fortune in Anchuria, just as it had formed the lucrative
+"graft" of Mellinger, the secretary of Miraflores.
+
+"I thank you, _Seor_ Goodwin," said Falcon, "for speaking plainly.
+Your word will be sufficient for the president. But, _Seor_ Goodwin,
+I am instructed to pursue every clue that presents itself in this
+matter. There is one that I have not yet touched upon. Our friends
+in France, _seor_, have a saying, '_Cherchez la femme_,' when there
+is a mystery without a clue. But here we do not have to search. The
+woman who accompanied the late President in his flight must surely--"
+
+"I must interrupt you there," interposed Goodwin. "It is true that
+when I entered the hotel for the purpose of intercepting President
+Miraflores I found a lady there. I must beg of you to remember that
+that lady is now my wife. I speak for her as I do for myself. She
+knows nothing of the fate of the valise or of the money that you
+are seeking. You will say to his excellency that I guarantee her
+innocence. I do not need to add to you, Colonel Falcon, that I do not
+care to have her questioned or disturbed."
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed again.
+
+"_Por supuesto_, no!" he cried. And to indicate that the inquiry was
+ended he added: "And now, _seor_, let me beg of you to show me that
+sea view from your _galeria_ of which you spoke. I am a lover of the
+sea."
+
+In the early evening Goodwin walked back to the town with his guest,
+leaving him at the corner of the Calle Grande. As he was returning
+homeward one "Beelzebub" Blythe, with the air of a courtier and the
+outward aspect of a scarecrow, pounced upon him hopefully from the
+door of a _pulperia_.
+
+Blythe had been re-christened "Beelzebub" as an acknowledgment of the
+greatness of his fall. Once in some distant Paradise Lost, he had
+foregathered with the angels of the earth. But Fate had hurled him
+headlong down to the tropics, where flamed in his bosom a fire that
+was seldom quenched. In Coralio they called him a beachcomber; but he
+was, in reality, a categorical idealist who strove to anamorphosize
+the dull verities of life by the means of brandy and rum. As
+Beelzebub, himself, might have held in his clutch with unwitting
+tenacity his harp or crown during his tremendous fall, so his
+namesake had clung to his gold-rimmed eyeglasses as the only souvenir
+of his lost estate. These he wore with impressiveness and distinction
+while he combed beaches and extracted toll from his friends. By some
+mysterious means he kept his drink-reddened face always smoothly
+shaven. For the rest he sponged gracefully upon whomsoever he could
+for enough to keep him pretty drunk, and sheltered from the rains and
+night dews.
+
+"Hallo, Goodwin!" called the derelict, airily. "I was hoping I'd
+strike you. I wanted to see you particularly. Suppose we go where we
+can talk. Of course you know there's a chap down here looking up the
+money old Miraflores lost."
+
+"Yes," said Goodwin, "I've been talking with him. Let's go into
+Espada's place. I can spare you ten minutes."
+
+They went into the _pulperia_ and sat at a little table upon stools
+with rawhide tops.
+
+"Have a drink?" said Goodwin.
+
+"They can't bring it too quickly," said Blythe. "I've been in a
+drought ever since morning. Hi--_muchacho!--el aguardiente por ac_."
+
+"Now, what do you want to see me about?" asked Goodwin, when the
+drinks were before them.
+
+"Confound it, old man," drawled Blythe, "why do you spoil a golden
+moment like this with business? I wanted to see you--well, this has
+the preference." He gulped down his brandy, and gazed longingly into
+the empty glass.
+
+"Have another?" suggested Goodwin.
+
+"Between gentlemen," said the fallen angel, "I don't quite like your
+use of that word 'another.' It isn't quite delicate. But the concrete
+idea that the word represents is not displeasing."
+
+The glasses were refilled. Blythe sipped blissfully from his, as he
+began to enter the state of a true idealist.
+
+"I must trot along in a minute or two," hinted Goodwin. "Was there
+anything in particular?"
+
+Blythe did not reply at once.
+
+"Old Losada would make it a hot country," he remarked at length,
+"for the man who swiped that gripsack of treasury boodle, don't you
+think?"
+
+"Undoubtedly, he would," agreed Goodwin calmly, as he rose leisurely
+to his feet. "I'll be running over to the house now, old man. Mrs.
+Goodwin is alone. There was nothing important you had to say, was
+there?"
+
+"That's all," said Blythe. "Unless you wouldn't mind sending in
+another drink from the bar as you go out. Old Espada has closed my
+account to profit and loss. And pay for the lot, will you, like a
+good fellow?"
+
+"All right," said Goodwin. "_Buenas noches._"
+
+"Beelzebub" Blythe lingered over his cups, polishing his eyeglasses
+with a disreputable handkerchief.
+
+"I thought I could do it, but I couldn't," he muttered to himself
+after a time. "A gentleman can't blackmail the man that he drinks
+with."
+
+
+
+
+VIII
+
+THE ADMIRAL
+
+
+Spilled milk draws few tears from an Anchurian administration. Many
+are its lacteal sources; and the clocks' hands point forever to
+milking time. Even the rich cream skimmed from the treasury by the
+bewitched Miraflores did not cause the newly-installed patriots to
+waste time in unprofitable regrets. The government philosophically
+set about supplying the deficiency by increasing the import duties
+and by "suggesting" to wealthy private citizens that contributions
+according to their means would be considered patriotic and in
+order. Prosperity was expected to attend the reign of Losada, the
+new president. The ousted office-holders and military favourites
+organized a new "Liberal" party, and began to lay their plans for
+a re-succession. Thus the game of Anchurian politics began, like a
+Chinese comedy, to unwind slowly its serial length. Here and there
+Mirth peeps for an instant from the wings and illumines the florid
+lines.
+
+A dozen quarts of champagne in conjunction with an informal sitting
+of the president and his cabinet led to the establishment of the navy
+and the appointment of Felipe Carrera as its admiral.
+
+Next to the champagne the credit of the appointment belongs to Don
+Sabas Placido, the newly confirmed Minister of War.
+
+The president had requested a convention of his cabinet for the
+discussion of questions politic and for the transaction of certain
+routine matters of state. The session had been signally tedious; the
+business and the wine prodigiously dry. A sudden, prankish humour of
+Don Sabas, impelling him to the deed, spiced the grave affairs of
+state with a whiff of agreeable playfulness.
+
+In the dilatory order of business had come a bulletin from the
+coast department of Orilla del Mar reporting the seizure by the
+custom-house officers at the town of Coralio of the sloop _Estrella
+del Noche_ and her cargo of drygoods, patent medicines, granulated
+sugar and three-star brandy. Also six Martini rifles and a barrel of
+American whisky. Caught in the act of smuggling, the sloop with its
+cargo was now, according to law, the property of the republic.
+
+The Collector of Customs, in making his report, departed from the
+conventional forms so far as to suggest that the confiscated vessel
+be converted to the use of the government. The prize was the first
+capture to the credit of the department in ten years. The collector
+took opportunity to pat his department on the back.
+
+It often happened that government officers required transportation
+from point to point along the coast, and means were usually lacking.
+Furthermore, the sloop could be manned by a loyal crew and employed
+as a coast guard to discourage the pernicious art of smuggling. The
+collector also ventured to nominate one to whom the charge of the
+boat could be safely intrusted--a young man of Coralio, Felipe
+Carrera--not, be it understood, one of extreme wisdom, but loyal and
+the best sailor along the coast.
+
+It was upon this hint that the Minister of War acted, executing a
+rare piece of drollery that so enlivened the tedium of executive
+session.
+
+In the constitution of this small, maritime banana republic was a
+forgotten section that provided for the maintenance of a navy. This
+provision--with many other wiser ones--had lain inert since the
+establishment of the republic. Anchuria had no navy and had no use
+for one. It was characteristic of Don Sabas--a man at once merry,
+learned, whimsical and audacious--that he should have disturbed the
+dust of this musty and sleeping statute to increase the humour of the
+world by so much as a smile from his indulgent colleagues.
+
+With delightful mock seriousness the Minister of War proposed the
+creation of a navy. He argued its need and the glories it might
+achieve with such gay and witty zeal that the travesty overcame with
+its humour even the swart dignity of President Losada himself.
+
+The champagne was bubbling trickily in the veins of the mercurial
+statesmen. It was not the custom of the grave governors of Anchuria
+to enliven their sessions with a beverage so apt to cast a veil of
+disparagement over sober affairs. The wine had been a thoughtful
+compliment tendered by the agent of the Vesuvius Fruit Company as a
+token of amicable relations--and certain consummated deals--between
+that company and the republic of Anchuria.
+
+The jest was carried to its end. A formidable, official document was
+prepared, encrusted with chromatic seals and jaunty with fluttering
+ribbons, bearing the florid signatures of state. This commission
+conferred upon el Seor Don Felipe Carrera the title of Flag Admiral
+of the Republic of Anchuria. Thus within the space of a few minutes
+and the dominion of a dozen "extra dry," the country took its place
+among the naval powers of the world, and Felipe Carrera became
+entitled to a salute of nineteen guns whenever he might enter port.
+
+The southern races are lacking in that particular kind of humour
+that finds entertainment in the defects and misfortunes bestowed by
+Nature. Owing to this defect in their constitution they are not moved
+to laughter (as are their northern brothers) by the spectacle of the
+deformed, the feeble-minded or the insane.
+
+Felipe Carrera was sent upon earth with but half his wits. Therefore,
+the people of Coralio called him "_El pobrecito loco_"--"the poor
+little crazed one"--saying that God had sent but half of him to
+earth, retaining the other half.
+
+A sombre youth, glowering, and speaking only at the rarest times,
+Felipe was but negatively "loco." On shore he generally refused all
+conversation. He seemed to know that he was badly handicapped on
+land, where so many kinds of understanding are needed; but on the
+water his one talent set him equal with most men. Few sailors whom
+God had carefully and completely made could handle a sailboat as
+well. Five points nearer the wind than even the best of them he
+could sail his sloop. When the elements raged and set other men to
+cowering, the deficiencies of Felipe seemed of little importance.
+He was a perfect sailor, if an imperfect man. He owned no boat, but
+worked among the crews of the schooners and sloops that skimmed the
+coast, trading and freighting fruit out to the steamers where there
+was no harbour. It was through his famous skill and boldness on the
+sea, as well as for the pity felt for his mental imperfections, that
+he was recommended by the collector as a suitable custodian of the
+captured sloop.
+
+When the outcome of Don Sabas' little pleasantry arrived in the form
+of the imposing and preposterous commission, the collector smiled.
+He had not expected such prompt and overwhelming response to his
+recommendation. He despatched a _muchacho_ at once to fetch the
+future admiral.
+
+The collector waited in his official quarters. His office was in the
+Calle Grande, and the sea breezes hummed through its windows all day.
+The collector, in white linen and canvas shoes, philandered with
+papers on an antique desk. A parrot, perched on a pen rack, seasoned
+the official tedium with a fire of choice Castilian imprecations. Two
+rooms opened into the collector's. In one the clerical force of young
+men of variegated complexions transacted with glitter and parade
+their several duties. Through the open door of the other room could
+be seen a bronze babe, guiltless of clothing, that rollicked upon the
+floor. In a grass hammock a thin woman, tinted a pale lemon, played
+a guitar and swung contentedly in the breeze. Thus surrounded by
+the routine of his high duties and the visible tokens of agreeable
+domesticity, the collector's heart was further made happy by the
+power placed in his hands to brighten the fortunes of the "innocent"
+Felipe.
+
+Felipe came and stood before the collector. He was a lad of twenty,
+not ill-favoured in looks, but with an expression of distant and
+pondering vacuity. He wore white cotton trousers, down the seams
+of which he had sewed red stripes with some vague aim at military
+decoration. A flimsy blue shirt fell open at his throat; his feet
+were bare; he held in his hand the cheapest of straw hats from the
+States.
+
+"Seor Carrera," said the collector, gravely, producing the showy
+commission, "I have sent for you at the president's bidding. This
+document that I present to you confers upon you the title of Admiral
+of this great republic, and gives you absolute command of the naval
+forces and fleet of our country. You may think, friend Felipe, that
+we have no navy--but yes! The sloop the _Estrella del Noche_, that my
+brave men captured from the coast smugglers, is to be placed under
+your command. The boat is to be devoted to the services of your
+country. You will be ready at all times to convey officials of the
+government to points along the coast where they may be obliged to
+visit. You will also act as a coast-guard to prevent, as far as you
+may be able, the crime of smuggling. You will uphold the honour and
+prestige of your country at sea, and endeavour to place Anchuria
+among the proudest naval powers of the world. These are your
+instructions as the Minister of War desires me to convey them to you.
+_Por Dios!_ I do not know how all this is to be accomplished, for
+not one word did his letter contain in respect to a crew or to the
+expenses of this navy. Perhaps you are to provide a crew yourself,
+Seor Admiral--I do not know--but it is a very high honour that has
+descended upon you. I now hand you your commission. When you are
+ready for the boat I will give orders that she shall be made over
+into your charge. That is as far as my instructions go."
+
+Felipe took the commission that the collector handed to him. He gazed
+through the open window at the sea for a moment, with his customary
+expression of deep but vain pondering. Then he turned without having
+spoken a word, and walked swiftly away through the hot sand of the
+street.
+
+"_Pobrecito loco!_" sighed the collector; and the parrot on the pen
+racks screeched "Loco!--loco!--loco!"
+
+The next morning a strange procession filed through the streets to
+the collector's office. At its head was the admiral of the navy.
+Somewhere Felipe had raked together a pitiful semblance of a military
+uniform--a pair of red trousers, a dingy blue short jacket heavily
+ornamented with gold braid, and an old fatigue cap that must have
+been cast away by one of the British soldiers in Belize and brought
+away by Felipe on one of his coasting voyages. Buckled around his
+waist was an ancient ship's cutlass contributed to his equipment by
+Pedro Lafitte, the baker, who proudly asserted its inheritance from
+his ancestor, the illustrious buccaneer. At the admiral's heels
+tagged his newly-shipped crew--three grinning, glossy, black Caribs,
+bare to the waist, the sand spurting in showers from the spring of
+their naked feet.
+
+Briefly and with dignity Felipe demanded his vessel of the collector.
+And now a fresh honour awaited him. The collector's wife, who played
+the guitar and read novels in the hammock all day, had more than a
+little romance in her placid, yellow bosom. She had found in an old
+book an engraving of a flag that purported to be the naval flag of
+Anchuria. Perhaps it had so been designed by the founders of the
+nation; but, as no navy had ever been established, oblivion had
+claimed the flag. Laboriously with her own hands she had made a flag
+after the pattern--a red cross upon a blue-and-white ground. She
+presented it to Felipe with these words: "Brave sailor, this flag is
+of your country. Be true, and defend it with your life. Go you with
+God."
+
+For the first time since his appointment the admiral showed a flicker
+of emotion. He took the silken emblem, and passed his hand reverently
+over its surface. "I am the admiral," he said to the collector's
+lady. Being on land he could bring himself to no more exuberant
+expression of sentiment. At sea with the flag at the masthead of his
+navy, some more eloquent exposition of feelings might be forthcoming.
+
+Abruptly the admiral departed with his crew. For the next three days
+they were busy giving the _Estrella del Noche_ a new coat of white
+paint trimmed with blue. And then Felipe further adorned himself by
+fastening a handful of brilliant parrot's plumes in his cap. Again he
+tramped with his faithful crew to the collector's office and formally
+notified him that the sloop's name had been changed to _El Nacional_.
+
+During the next few months the navy had its troubles. Even an admiral
+is perplexed to know what to do without any orders. But none came.
+Neither did any salaries. _El Nacional_ swung idly at anchor.
+
+When Felipe's little store of money was exhausted he went to the
+collector and raised the question of finances.
+
+"Salaries!" exclaimed the collector, with hands raised; "_Valgame
+Dios!_ not one _centavo_ of my own pay have I received for the last
+seven months. The pay of an admiral, do you ask? _Quin sabe?_ Should
+it be less than three thousand _pesos_? _Mira!_ you will see a
+revolution in this country very soon. A good sign of it is when the
+government calls all the time for _pesos_, _pesos_, _pesos_, and pays
+none out."
+
+Felipe left the collector's office with a look almost of content
+on his sombre face. A revolution would mean fighting, and then the
+government would need his services. It was rather humiliating to be
+an admiral without anything to do, and have a hungry crew at your
+heels begging for _reales_ to buy plantains and tobacco with.
+
+When he returned to where his happy-go-lucky Caribs were waiting they
+sprang up and saluted, as he had drilled them to do.
+
+"Come, _muchachos_," said the admiral; "it seems that the government
+is poor. It has no money to give us. We will earn what we need to
+live upon. Thus will we serve our country. Soon"--his heavy eyes
+almost lighted up--"it may gladly call upon us for help."
+
+Thereafter _El Nacional_ turned out with the other coast craft and
+became a wage-earner. She worked with the lighters freighting bananas
+and oranges out to the fruit steamers that could not approach nearer
+than a mile from the shore. Surely a self-supporting navy deserves
+red letters in the budget of any nation.
+
+After earning enough at freighting to keep himself and his crew in
+provisions for a week Felipe would anchor the navy and hang about
+the little telegraph office, looking like one of the chorus of an
+insolvent comic opera troupe besieging the manager's den. A hope for
+orders from the capital was always in his heart. That his services as
+admiral had never been called into requirement hurt his pride and
+patriotism. At every call he would inquire, gravely and expectantly,
+for despatches. The operator would pretend to make a search, and then
+reply:
+
+"Not yet, it seems, _Seor el Almirante--poco tiempo!_"
+
+Outside in the shade of the lime-trees the crew chewed sugar cane or
+slumbered, well content to serve a country that was contented with so
+little service.
+
+One day in the early summer the revolution predicted by the collector
+flamed out suddenly. It had long been smouldering. At the first note
+of alarm the admiral of the navy force and fleet made all sail for a
+larger port on the coast of a neighbouring republic, where he traded
+a hastily collected cargo of fruit for its value in cartridges for
+the five Martini rifles, the only guns that the navy could boast.
+Then to the telegraph office sped the admiral. Sprawling in his
+favourite corner, in his fast-decaying uniform, with his prodigious
+sabre distributed between his red legs, he waited for the
+long-delayed, but now soon expected, orders.
+
+"Not yet, _Seor el Almirante_," the telegraph clerk would call to
+him--"_poco tiempo!_"
+
+At the answer the admiral would plump himself down with a great
+rattling of scabbard to await the infrequent tick of the little
+instrument on the table.
+
+"They will come," would be his unshaken reply; "I am the admiral."
+
+
+
+
+IX
+
+THE FLAG PARAMOUNT
+
+
+At the head of the insurgent party appeared that Hector and learned
+Theban of the southern republics, Don Sabas Placido. A traveller,
+a soldier, a poet, a scientist, a statesman and a connoisseur--the
+wonder was that he could content himself with the petty, remote life
+of his native country.
+
+"It is a whim of Placido's," said a friend who knew him well, "to
+take up political intrigue. It is not otherwise than as if he had
+come upon a new _tempo_ in music, a new bacillus in the air, a new
+scent, or rhyme, or explosive. He will squeeze this revolution dry of
+sensations, and a week afterward will forget it, skimming the seas
+of the world in his brigantine to add to his already world-famous
+collections. Collections of what? _Por Dios!_ of everything from
+postage stamps to prehistoric stone idols."
+
+But, for a mere dilettante, the sthetic Placido seemed to be
+creating a lively row. The people admired him; they were fascinated
+by his brilliancy and flattered by his taking an interest in so
+small a thing as his native country. They rallied to the call of his
+lieutenants in the capital, where (somewhat contrary to arrangements)
+the army remained faithful to the government. There was also lively
+skirmishing in the coast towns. It was rumoured that the revolution
+was aided by the Vesuvius Fruit Company, the power that forever
+stood with chiding smile and uplifted finger to keep Anchuria in the
+class of good children. Two of its steamers, the _Traveler_ and the
+_Salvador_, were known to have conveyed insurgent troops from point
+to point along the coast.
+
+As yet there had been no actual uprising in Coralio. Military law
+prevailed, and the ferment was bottled for the time. And then came
+the word that everywhere the revolutionists were encountering defeat.
+In the capital the president's forces triumphed; and there was a
+rumour that the leaders of the revolt had been forced to fly, hotly
+pursued.
+
+In the little telegraph office at Coralio there was always a
+gathering of officials and loyal citizens, awaiting news from the
+seat of government. One morning the telegraph key began clicking,
+and presently the operator called, loudly: "One telegram for _el
+Almirante_, Don Seor Felipe Carrera!"
+
+There was a shuffling sound, a great rattling of tin scabbard, and
+the admiral, prompt at his spot of waiting, leaped across the room to
+receive it.
+
+The message was handed to him. Slowly spelling it out, he found it to
+be his first official order--thus running:
+
+
+ Proceed immediately with your vessel to mouth of Rio Ruiz;
+ transport beef and provisions to barracks at Alforan.
+
+ Martinez, General.
+
+
+Small glory, to be sure, in this, his country's first call. But it
+had called, and joy surged in the admiral's breast. He drew his
+cutlass belt to another buckle hole, roused his dozing crew, and in a
+quarter of an hour _El Nacional_ was tacking swiftly down coast in a
+stiff landward breeze.
+
+The Rio Ruiz is a small river, emptying into the sea ten miles below
+Coralio. That portion of the coast is wild and solitary. Through a
+gorge in the Cordilleras rushes the Rio Ruiz, cold and bubbling, to
+glide, at last, with breadth and leisure, through an alluvial morass
+into the sea.
+
+In two hours _El Nacional_ entered the river's mouth. The banks
+were crowded with a disposition of formidable trees. The sumptuous
+undergrowth of the tropics overflowed the land, and drowned itself in
+the fallow waters. Silently the sloop entered there, and met a deeper
+silence. Brilliant with greens and ochres and floral scarlets, the
+umbrageous mouth of the Rio Ruiz furnished no sound or movement save
+of the sea-going water as it purled against the prow of the vessel.
+Small chance there seemed of wresting beef or provisions from that
+empty solitude.
+
+The admiral decided to cast anchor, and, at the chain's rattle, the
+forest was stimulated to instant and resounding uproar. The mouth of
+the Rio Ruiz had only been taking a morning nap. Parrots and baboons
+screeched and barked in the trees; a whirring and a hissing and a
+booming marked the awakening of animal life; a dark blue bulk was
+visible for an instant, as a startled tapir fought his way through
+the vines.
+
+The navy, under orders, hung in the mouth of the little river for
+hours. The crew served the dinner of shark's fin soup, plantains,
+crab gumbo and sour wine. The admiral, with a three-foot telescope,
+closely scanned the impervious foliage fifty yards away.
+
+It was nearly sunset when a reverberating "hal-lo-o-o!" came from the
+forest to their left. It was answered; and three men, mounted upon
+mules, crashed through the tropic tangle to within a dozen yards of
+the river's bank. There they dismounted; and one, unbuckling his
+belt, struck each mule a violent blow with his sword scabbard, so
+that they, with a fling of heels, dashed back again into the forest.
+
+Those were strange-looking men to be conveying beef and provisions.
+One was a large and exceedingly active man, of striking presence. He
+was of the purest Spanish type, with curling, gray-besprinkled, dark
+hair, blue, sparkling eyes, and the pronounced air of a _caballero
+grande_. The other two were small, brown-faced men, wearing white
+military uniforms, high riding boots and swords. The clothes of all
+were drenched, bespattered and rent by the thicket. Some stress of
+circumstance must have driven them, _diable quatre_, through flood,
+mire and jungle.
+
+"_O-h! Seor Almirante_," called the large man. "Send to us your
+boat."
+
+The dory was lowered, and Felipe, with one of the Caribs, rowed
+toward the left bank.
+
+The large man stood near the water's brink, waist deep in the curling
+vines. As he gazed upon the scarecrow figure in the stern of the dory
+a sprightly interest beamed upon his mobile face.
+
+Months of wageless and thankless service had dimmed the admiral's
+splendour. His red trousers were patched and ragged. Most of the
+bright buttons and yellow braid were gone from his jacket. The visor
+of his cap was torn, and depended almost to his eyes. The admiral's
+feet were bare.
+
+"Dear admiral," cried the large man, and his voice was like a blast
+from a horn, "I kiss your hands. I knew we could build upon your
+fidelity. You had our despatch--from General Martinez. A little
+nearer with your boat, dear Admiral. Upon these devils of shifting
+vines we stand with the smallest security."
+
+Felipe regarded him with a stolid face.
+
+"Provisions and beef for the barracks at Alforan," he quoted.
+
+"No fault of the butchers, _Almirante mio_, that the beef awaits you
+not. But you are come in time to save the cattle. Get us aboard your
+vessel, seor, at once. You first, _caballeros-- priesa!_ Come back
+for me. The boat is too small."
+
+The dory conveyed the two officers to the sloop, and returned for the
+large man.
+
+"Have you so gross a thing as food, good admiral?" he cried, when
+aboard. "And, perhaps, coffee? Beef and provisions! _Nombre de Dios!_
+a little longer and we could have eaten one of those mules that you,
+Colonel Rafael, saluted so feelingly with your sword scabbard at
+parting. Let us have food; and then we will sail--for the barracks at
+Alforan--no?"
+
+The Caribs prepared a meal, to which the three passengers of _El
+Nacional_ set themselves with famished delight. About sunset, as was
+its custom, the breeze veered and swept back from the mountains, cool
+and steady, bringing a taste of the stagnant lagoons and mangrove
+swamps that guttered the lowlands. The mainsail of the sloop was
+hoisted and swelled to it, and at that moment they heard shouts and a
+waxing clamour from the bosky profundities of the shore.
+
+"The butchers, my dear admiral," said the large man, smiling, "too
+late for the slaughter."
+
+Further than his orders to his crew, the admiral was saying nothing.
+The topsail and jib were spread, and the sloop glided out of the
+estuary. The large man and his companions had bestowed themselves
+with what comfort they could about the bare deck. Belike, the thing
+big in their minds had been their departure from that critical shore;
+and now that the hazard was so far reduced their thoughts were loosed
+to the consideration of further deliverance. But when they saw the
+sloop turn and fly up coast again they relaxed, satisfied with the
+course the admiral had taken.
+
+The large man sat at ease, his spirited blue eye engaged in the
+contemplation of the navy's commander. He was trying to estimate this
+sombre and fantastic lad, whose impenetrable stolidity puzzled him.
+Himself a fugitive, his life sought, and chafing under the smart
+of defeat and failure, it was characteristic of him to transfer
+instantly his interest to the study of a thing new to him. It
+was like him, too, to have conceived and risked all upon this
+last desperate and madcap scheme--this message to a poor, crazed
+_fanatico_ cruising about with his grotesque uniform and his farcical
+title. But his companions had been at their wits' end; escape had
+seemed incredible; and now he was pleased with the success of the
+plan they had called crack-brained and precarious.
+
+The brief, tropic twilight seemed to slide swiftly into the pearly
+splendour of a moonlit night. And now the lights of Coralio appeared,
+distributed against the darkening shore to their right. The admiral
+stood, silent, at the tiller; the Caribs, like black panthers, held
+the sheets, leaping noiselessly at his short commands. The three
+passengers were watching intently the sea before them, and when at
+length they came in sight of the bulk of a steamer lying a mile out
+from the town, with her lights radiating deep into the water, they
+held a sudden voluble and close-headed converse. The sloop was
+speeding as if to strike midway between ship and shore.
+
+The large man suddenly separated from his companions and approached
+the scarecrow at the helm.
+
+"My dear admiral," he said, "the government has been exceedingly
+remiss. I feel all the shame for it that only its ignorance of your
+devoted service has prevented it from sustaining. An inexcusable
+oversight has been made. A vessel, a uniform and a crew worthy of
+your fidelity shall be furnished you. But just now, dear admiral,
+there is business of moment afoot. The steamer lying there is the
+_Salvador_. I and my friends desire to be conveyed to her, where we
+are sent on the government's business. Do us the favour to shape your
+course accordingly."
+
+Without replying, the admiral gave a sharp command, and put the
+tiller hard to port. _El Nacional_ swerved, and headed straight as an
+arrow's course for the shore.
+
+"Do me the favour," said the large man, a trifle restively, "to
+acknowledge, at least, that you catch the sound of my words." It
+was possible that the fellow might be lacking in senses as well as
+intellect.
+
+The admiral emitted a croaking, harsh laugh, and spake.
+
+"They will stand you," he said, "with your face to a wall and shoot
+you dead. That is the way they kill traitors. I knew you when you
+stepped into my boat. I have seen your picture in a book. You are
+Sabas Placido, traitor to your country. With your face to a wall. So,
+you will die. I am the admiral, and I will take you to them. With
+your face to a wall. Yes."
+
+Don Sabas half turned and waved his hand, with a ringing laugh,
+toward his fellow fugitives. "To you, _caballeros_, I have related
+the history of that session when we issued that O! so ridiculous
+commission. Of a truth our jest has been turned against us. Behold
+the Frankenstein's monster we have created!"
+
+Don Sabas glanced toward the shore. The lights of Coralio were
+drawing near. He could see the beach, the warehouse of the _Bodega
+Nacional_, the long, low _cuartel_ occupied by the soldiers, and,
+behind that, gleaming in the moonlight, a stretch of high adobe wall.
+He had seen men stood with their faces to that wall and shot dead.
+
+Again he addressed the extravagant figure at the helm.
+
+"It is true," he said, "that I am fleeing the country. But, receive
+the assurance that I care very little for that. Courts and camps
+everywhere are open to Sabas Placido. _Vaya!_ what is this molehill
+of a republic--this pig's head of a country--to a man like me? I am a
+_paisano_ of everywhere. In Rome, in London, in Paris, in Vienna, you
+will hear them say: 'Welcome back, Don Sabas.' Come!--_tonto_--baboon
+of a boy--admiral, whatever you call yourself, turn your boat. Put us
+on board the _Salvador_, and here is your pay--five hundred _pesos_
+in money of the _Estados Unidos_--more than your lying government
+will pay you in twenty years."
+
+Don Sabas pressed a plump purse against the youth's hand. The admiral
+gave no heed to the words or the movement. Braced against the helm,
+he was holding the sloop dead on her shoreward course. His dull face
+was lit almost to intelligence by some inward conceit that seemed to
+afford him joy, and found utterance in another parrot-like cackle.
+
+"That is why they do it," he said--"so that you will not see the
+guns. They fire--oom!--and you fall dead. With your face to the wall.
+Yes."
+
+The admiral called a sudden order to his crew. The lithe, silent
+Caribs made fast the sheets they held, and slipped down the hatchway
+into the hold of the sloop. When the last one had disappeared, Don
+Sabas, like a big, brown leopard, leaped forward, closed and fastened
+the hatch and stood, smiling.
+
+"No rifles, if you please, dear admiral," he said. "It was a whimsey
+of mine once to compile a dictionary of the Carib _lengua_. So, I
+understood your order. Perhaps now you will--"
+
+He cut short his words, for he heard the dull "swish" of iron
+scraping along tin. The admiral had drawn the cutlass of Pedro
+Lafitte, and was darting upon him. The blade descended, and it was
+only by a display of surprising agility that the large man escaped,
+with only a bruised shoulder, the glancing weapon. He was drawing his
+pistol as he sprang, and the next instant he shot the admiral down.
+
+Don Sabas stooped over him, and rose again.
+
+"In the heart," he said briefly. "_Seores_, the navy is abolished."
+
+Colonel Rafael sprang to the helm, and the other officer hastened to
+loose the mainsail sheets. The boom swung round; _El Nacional_ veered
+and began to tack industriously for the _Salvador_.
+
+"Strike that flag, seor," called Colonel Rafael. "Our friends on the
+steamer will wonder why we are sailing under it."
+
+"Well said," cried Don Sabas. Advancing to the mast he lowered the
+flag to the deck, where lay its too loyal supporter. Thus ended the
+Minister of War's little piece of after-dinner drollery, and by the
+same hand that began it.
+
+Suddenly Don Sabas gave a great cry of joy, and ran down the slanting
+deck to the side of Colonel Rafael. Across his arm he carried the
+flag of the extinguished navy.
+
+"_Mire! mire! seor._ Ah, _Dios!_ Already can I hear that great bear
+of an _Oestreicher_ shout, _'Du hast mein herz gebrochen!' Mire!_
+Of my friend, Herr Grunitz, of Vienna, you have heard me relate.
+That man has travelled to Ceylon for an orchid--to Patagonia for a
+headdress--to Benares for a slipper--to Mozambique for a spearhead
+to add to his famous collections. Thou knowest, also, _amigo_ Rafael,
+that I have been a gatherer of curios. My collection of battle flags
+of the world's navies was the most complete in existence until last
+year. Then Herr Grunitz secured two, O! such rare specimens. One of a
+Barbary state, and one of the Makarooroos, a tribe on the west coast
+of Africa. I have not those, but they can be procured. But this flag,
+seor--do you know what it is? Name of God! do you know? See that
+red cross upon the blue and white ground! You never saw it before?
+_Seguramente no._ It is the naval flag of your country. _Mire!_
+This rotten tub we stand upon is its navy--that dead cockatoo lying
+there was its commander--that stroke of cutlass and single pistol
+shot a sea battle. All a piece of absurd foolery, I grant you--but
+authentic. There has never been another flag like this, and there
+never will be another. No. It is unique in the whole world. Yes.
+Think of what that means to a collector of flags! Do you know,
+_Coronel mio_, how many golden crowns Herr Grunitz would give for
+this flag? Ten thousand, likely. Well, a hundred thousand would not
+buy it. Beautiful flag! Only flag! Little devil of a most heaven-born
+flag! _O-h!_ old grumbler beyond the ocean. Wait till Don Sabas
+comes again to the Knigin Strasse. He will let you kneel and touch
+the folds of it with one finger. _O-h!_ old spectacled ransacker of
+the world!"
+
+Forgotten was the impotent revolution, the danger, the loss, the
+gall of defeat. Possessed solely by the inordinate and unparalleled
+passion of the collector, he strode up and down the little deck,
+clasping to his breast with one hand the paragon of a flag. He
+snapped his fingers triumphantly toward the east. He shouted the
+paean to his prize in trumpet tones, as though he would make old
+Grunitz hear in his musty den beyond the sea.
+
+They were waiting, on the _Salvador_, to welcome them. The sloop came
+close alongside the steamer where her sides were sliced almost to the
+lower deck for the loading of fruit. The sailors of the _Salvador_
+grappled and held her there.
+
+Captain McLeod leaned over the side.
+
+"Well, seor, the jig is up, I'm told."
+
+"The jig is up?" Don Sabas looked perplexed for a moment. "That
+revolution--ah, yes!" With a shrug of his shoulders he dismissed the
+matter.
+
+The captain learned of the escape and the imprisoned crew.
+
+"Caribs?" he said; "no harm in them." He slipped down into the sloop
+and kicked loose the hasp of the hatch. The black fellows came
+tumbling up, sweating but grinning.
+
+"Hey! black boys!" said the captain, in a dialect of his own; "you
+sabe, catchy boat and vamos back same place quick."
+
+They saw him point to themselves, the sloop and Coralio. "Yas, yas!"
+they cried, with broader grins and many nods.
+
+The four--Don Sabas, the two officers and the captain--moved to quit
+the sloop. Don Sabas lagged a little behind, looking at the still
+form of the late admiral, sprawled in his paltry trappings.
+
+"_Pobrecito loco_," he said softly.
+
+He was a brilliant cosmopolite and a _cognoscente_ of high rank; but,
+after all, he was of the same race and blood and instinct as this
+people. Even as the simple _paisanos_ of Coralio had said it, so said
+Don Sabas. Without a smile, he looked, and said, "The poor little
+crazed one!"
+
+Stooping he raised the limp shoulders, drew the priceless and
+induplicable flag under them and over the breast, pinning it there
+with the diamond star of the Order of San Carlos that he took from
+the collar of his own coat.
+
+He followed after the others, and stood with them upon the deck of
+the _Salvador_. The sailors that steadied _El Nacional_ shoved her
+off. The jabbering Caribs hauled away at the rigging; the sloop
+headed for the shore.
+
+And Herr Grunitz's collection of naval flags was still the finest in
+the world.
+
+
+
+
+X
+
+THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM
+
+
+One night when there was no breeze, and Coralio seemed closer than
+ever to the gratings of Avernus, five men were grouped about the door
+of the photograph establishment of Keogh and Clancy. Thus, in all the
+scorched and exotic places of the earth, Caucasians meet when the
+day's work is done to preserve the fulness of their heritage by the
+aspersion of alien things.
+
+Johnny Atwood lay stretched upon the grass in the undress uniform
+of a Carib, and prated feebly of cool water to be had in the
+cucumber-wood pumps of Dalesburg. Dr. Gregg, through the prestige of
+his whiskers and as a bribe against the relation of his imminent
+professional tales, was conceded the hammock that was swung between
+the door jamb and a calabash-tree. Keogh had moved out upon the grass
+a little table that held the instrument for burnishing completed
+photographs. He was the only busy one of the group. Industriously
+from between the cylinders of the burnisher rolled the finished
+depictments of Coralio's citizens. Blanchard, the French mining
+engineer, in his cool linen viewed the smoke of his cigarette through
+his calm glasses, impervious to the heat. Clancy sat on the steps,
+smoking his short pipe. His mood was the gossip's; the others were
+reduced, by the humidity, to the state of disability desirable in an
+audience.
+
+Clancy was an American with an Irish diathesis and cosmopolitan
+proclivities. Many businesses had claimed him, but not for long.
+The roadster's blood was in his veins. The voice of the tintype was
+but one of the many callings that had wooed him upon so many roads.
+Sometimes he could be persuaded to oral construction of his voyages
+into the informal and egregious. To-night there were symptoms of
+divulgement in him.
+
+"'Tis elegant weather for filibusterin'," he volunteered. "It reminds
+me of the time I struggled to liberate a nation from the poisonous
+breath of a tyrant's clutch. 'Twas hard work. 'Tis strainin' to the
+back and makes corns on the hands."
+
+"I didn't know you had ever lent your sword to an oppressed people,"
+murmured Atwood, from the grass.
+
+"I did," said Clancy; "and they turned it into a ploughshare."
+
+"What country was so fortunate as to secure your aid?" airily
+inquired Blanchard.
+
+"Where's Kamchatka?" asked Clancy, with seeming irrelevance.
+
+"Why, off Siberia somewhere in the Arctic regions," somebody
+answered, doubtfully.
+
+"I thought that was the cold one," said Clancy, with a satisfied nod.
+"I'm always gettin' the two names mixed. 'Twas Guatemala, then--the
+hot one--I've been filibusterin' with. Ye'll find that country on the
+map. 'Tis in the district known as the tropics. By the foresight of
+Providence, it lies on the coast so the geography man could run the
+names of the towns off into the water. They're an inch long, small
+type, composed of Spanish dialects, and, 'tis my opinion, of the same
+system of syntax that blew up the _Maine_. Yes, 'twas that country I
+sailed against, single-handed, and endeavoured to liberate it from
+a tyrannical government with a single-barreled pickaxe, unloaded
+at that. Ye don't understand, of course. 'Tis a statement demandin'
+elucidation and apologies.
+
+"'Twas in New Orleans one morning about the first of June; I was
+standin' down on the wharf, lookin' about at the ships in the river.
+There was a little steamer moored right opposite me that seemed about
+ready to sail. The funnels of it were throwin' out smoke, and a gang
+of roustabouts were carryin' aboard a pile of boxes that was stacked
+up on the wharf. The boxes were about two feet square, and somethin'
+like four feet long, and they seemed to be pretty heavy.
+
+"I walked over, careless, to the stack of boxes. I saw one of them
+had been broken in handlin'. 'Twas curiosity made me pull up the
+loose top and look inside. The box was packed full of Winchester
+rifles. 'So, so,' says I to myself; 'somebody's gettin' a twist on
+the neutrality laws. Somebody's aidin' with munitions of war. I
+wonder where the popguns are goin'?'
+
+"I heard somebody cough, and I turned around. There stood a
+little, round, fat man with a brown face and white clothes, a
+first-class-looking little man, with a four-karat diamond on his
+finger and his eye full of interrogations and respects. I judged
+he was a kind of foreigner--may be from Russia or Japan or the
+archipelagoes.
+
+"'Hist!' says the round man, full of concealments and confidences.
+'Will the seor respect the discoveryments he has made, that the mans
+on the ship shall not be acquaint? The seor will be a gentleman that
+shall not expose one thing that by accident occur.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I--for I judged him to be a kind of
+Frenchman--'receive my most exasperated assurances that your secret
+is safe with James Clancy. Furthermore, I will go so far as to
+remark, Veev la Liberty--veev it good and strong. Whenever you hear
+of a Clancy obstructin' the abolishment of existin' governments you
+may notify me by return mail.'
+
+"'The seor is good,' says the dark, fat man, smilin' under his
+black mustache. 'Wish you to come aboard my ship and drink of wine a
+glass.'
+
+"Bein' a Clancy, in two minutes me and the foreigner man were seated
+at a table in the cabin of the steamer, with a bottle between us. I
+could hear the heavy boxes bein' dumped into the hold. I judged that
+cargo must consist of at least 2,000 Winchesters. Me and the brown
+man drank the bottle of stuff, and he called the steward to bring
+another. When you amalgamate a Clancy with the contents of a bottle
+you practically instigate secession. I had heard a good deal about
+these revolutions in them tropical localities, and I begun to want a
+hand in it.
+
+"'You goin' to stir things up in your country, ain't you, monseer?'
+says I, with a wink to let him know I was on.
+
+"'Yes, yes,' said the little man, pounding his fist on the table.
+'A change of the greatest will occur. Too long have the people been
+oppressed with the promises and the never-to-happen things to become.
+The great work it shall be carry on. Yes. Our forces shall in the
+capital city strike of the soonest. _Carrambos!_'
+
+"'_Carrambos_ is the word,' says I, beginning to invest myself with
+enthusiasm and more wine, 'likewise veeva, as I said before. May the
+shamrock of old--I mean the banana-vine or the pie-plant, or whatever
+the imperial emblem may be of your down-trodden country, wave
+forever.'
+
+"'A thousand thank-yous,' says the round man, 'for your emission of
+amicable utterances. What our cause needs of the very most is mans
+who will the work do, to lift it along. Oh, for one thousands strong,
+good mans to aid the General De Vega that he shall to his country
+bring those success and glory! It is hard--oh, so hard to find good
+mans to help in the work.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I, leanin' over the table and graspin' his hand,
+'I don't know where your country is, but me heart bleeds for it. The
+heart of a Clancy was never deaf to the sight of an oppressed people.
+The family is filibusterers by birth, and foreigners by trade. If you
+can use James Clancy's arms and his blood in denudin' your shores of
+the tyrant's yoke they're yours to command.'
+
+"General De Vega was overcome with joy to confiscate my condolence of
+his conspiracies and predicaments. He tried to embrace me across the
+table, but his fatness, and the wine that had been in the bottles,
+prevented. Thus was I welcomed into the ranks of filibustery. Then
+the general man told me his country had the name of Guatemala, and
+was the greatest nation laved by any ocean whatever anywhere. He
+looked at me with tears in his eyes, and from time to time he would
+emit the remark, 'Ah! big, strong, brave mans! That is what my
+country need.'
+
+"General De Vega, as was the name by which he denounced himself,
+brought out a document for me to sign, which I did, makin' a fine
+flourish and curlycue with the tail of the 'y.'
+
+"'Your passage-money,' says the general, business-like, 'shall from
+your pay be deduct.'
+
+"'Twill not,' says I, haughty. 'I'll pay my own passage.' A hundred
+and eighty dollars I had in my inside pocket, and 'twas no common
+filibuster I was goin' to be, filibusterin' for me board and clothes.
+
+"The steamer was to sail in two hours, and I went ashore to get some
+things together I'd need. When I came aboard I showed the general
+with pride the outfit. 'Twas a fine Chinchilla overcoat, Arctic
+overshoes, fur cap and earmuffs, with elegant fleece-lined gloves and
+woolen muffler.
+
+"'_Carrambos!_' says the little general. 'What clothes are these that
+shall go to the tropic?' And then the little spalpeen laughs, and he
+calls the captain, and the captain calls the purser, and they pipe up
+the chief engineer, and the whole gang leans against the cabin and
+laughs at Clancy's wardrobe for Guatemala.
+
+"I reflects a bit, serious, and asks the general again to denominate
+the terms by which his country is called. He tells me, and I see then
+that 'twas the t'other one, Kamchatka, I had in mind. Since then I've
+had difficulty in separatin' the two nations in name, climate and
+geographic disposition.
+
+"I paid my passage--twenty-four dollars, first cabin--and ate at
+table with the officer crowd. Down on the lower deck was a gang of
+second-class passengers, about forty of them, seemin' to be Dagoes
+and the like. I wondered what so many of them were goin' along for.
+
+"Well, then, in three days we sailed alongside that Guatemala. 'Twas
+a blue country, and not yellow as 'tis miscolored on the map. We
+landed at a town on the coast, where a train of cars was waitin' for
+us on a dinky little railroad. The boxes on the steamer were brought
+ashore and loaded on the cars. The gang of Dagoes got aboard, too,
+the general and me in the front car. Yes, me and General De Vega
+headed the revolution, as it pulled out of the seaport town. That
+train travelled about as fast as a policeman goin' to a riot. It
+penetrated the most conspicuous lot of fuzzy scenery ever seen
+outside a geography. We run some forty miles in seven hours, and the
+train stopped. There was no more railroad. 'Twas a sort of camp in a
+damp gorge full of wildness and melancholies. They was gradin' and
+choppin' out the forests ahead to continue the road. 'Here,' says I
+to myself, 'is the romantic haunt of the revolutionists. Here will
+Clancy, by the virtue that is in a superior race and the inculcation
+of Fenian tactics, strike a tremendous blow for liberty.'
+
+"They unloaded the boxes from the train and begun to knock the tops
+off. From the first one that was open I saw General De Vega take the
+Winchester rifles and pass them around to a squad of morbid soldiery.
+The other boxes was opened next, and, believe me or not, divil
+another gun was to be seen. Every other box in the load was full of
+pickaxes and spades.
+
+"And then--sorrow be upon them tropics--the proud Clancy and the
+dishonoured Dagoes, each one of them, had to shoulder a pick or a
+spade, and march away to work on that dirty little railroad. Yes;
+'twas that the Dagoes shipped for, and 'twas that the filibusterin'
+Clancy signed for, though unbeknownst to himself at the time. In
+after days I found out about it. It seems 'twas hard to get hands
+to work on that road. The intelligent natives of the country was
+too lazy to work. Indeed, the saints know, 'twas unnecessary. By
+stretchin' out one hand, they could seize the most delicate and
+costly fruits of the earth, and, by stretchin' out the other, they
+could sleep for days at a time without hearin' a seven-o'clock
+whistle or the footsteps of the rent man upon the stairs. So,
+regular, the steamers travelled to the United States to seduce
+labour. Usually the imported spade-slingers died in two or three
+months from eatin' the over-ripe water and breathin' the violent
+tropical scenery. Wherefore they made them sign contracts for a year,
+when they hired them, and put an armed guard over the poor divils to
+keep them from runnin' away.
+
+"'Twas thus I was double-crossed by the tropics through a family
+failin' of goin' out of the way to hunt disturbances.
+
+"They gave me a pick, and I took it, meditatin' an insurrection on
+the spot; but there was the guards handlin' the Winchesters careless,
+and I come to the conclusion that discretion was the best part of
+filibusterin'. There was about a hundred of us in the gang startin'
+out to work, and the word was given to move. I steps out of the ranks
+and goes up to that General De Vega man, who was smokin' a cigar and
+gazin' upon the scene with satisfactions and glory. He smiles at me
+polite and devilish. 'Plenty work,' says he, 'for big, strong mans in
+Guatemala. Yes. T'irty dollars in the month. Good pay. Ah, yes. You
+strong, brave man. Bimeby we push those railroad in the capital very
+quick. They want you go work now. _Adios_, strong mans.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I, lingerin', 'will you tell a poor little Irishman
+this: When I set foot on your cockroachy steamer, and breathed
+liberal and revolutionary sentiments into your sour wine, did you
+think I was conspirin' to sling a pick on your contemptuous little
+railroad? And when you answered me with patriotic recitations,
+humping up the star-spangled cause of liberty, did you have
+meditations of reducin' me to the ranks of the stump-grubbin' Dagoes
+in the chain-gangs of your vile and grovelin' country?'
+
+"The general man expanded his rotundity and laughed considerable.
+Yes, he laughed very long and loud, and I, Clancy, stood and waited.
+
+"'Comical mans!' he shouts, at last. 'So you will kill me from the
+laughing. Yes; it is hard to find the brave, strong mans to aid my
+country. Revolutions? Did I speak of r-r-revolutions? Not one word.
+I say, big, strong mans is need in Guatemala. So. The mistake is of
+you. You have looked in those one box containing those gun for the
+guard. You think all boxes is contain gun? No.
+
+"'There is not war in Guatemala. But work? Yes. Good. T'irty dollar
+in the month. You shall shoulder one pickaxe, seor, and dig for the
+liberty and prosperity of Guatemala. Off to your work. The guard
+waits for you.'
+
+"'Little, fat, poodle dog of a brown man,' says I, quiet, but full of
+indignations and discomforts, 'things shall happen to you. Maybe not
+right away, but as soon as J. Clancy can formulate somethin' in the
+way of repartee.'
+
+"The boss of the gang orders us to work. I tramps off with the
+Dagoes, and I hears the distinguished patriot and kidnapper laughin'
+hearty as we go.
+
+"'Tis a sorrowful fact, for eight weeks I built railroads for that
+misbehavin' country. I filibustered twelve hours a day with a heavy
+pick and a spade, choppin' away the luxurious landscape that grew
+upon the right of way. We worked in swamps that smelled like there
+was a leak in the gas mains, trampin' down a fine assortment of the
+most expensive hothouse plants and vegetables. The scene was tropical
+beyond the wildest imagination of the geography man. The trees was
+all sky-scrapers; the underbrush was full of needles and pins;
+there was monkeys jumpin' around and crocodiles and pink-tailed
+mockin'-birds, and ye stood knee-deep in the rotten water and
+grabbled roots for the liberation of Guatemala. Of nights we would
+build smudges in camp to discourage the mosquitoes, and sit in the
+smoke, with the guards pacin' all around us. There was two hundred
+men workin' on the road--mostly Dagoes, nigger-men, Spanish-men and
+Swedes. Three or four were Irish.
+
+"One old man named Halloran--a man of Hibernian entitlements and
+discretions, explained it to me. He had been workin' on the road a
+year. Most of them died in less than six months. He was dried up to
+gristle and bone, and shook with chills every third night.
+
+"'When you first come,' says he, 'ye think ye'll leave right away.
+But they hold out your first month's pay for your passage over, and
+by that time the tropics has its grip on ye. Ye're surrounded by a
+ragin' forest full of disreputable beasts--lions and baboons and
+anacondas--waitin' to devour ye. The sun strikes ye hard, and melts
+the marrow in your bones. Ye get similar to the lettuce-eaters the
+poetry-book speaks about. Ye forget the elevated sintiments of life,
+such as patriotism, revenge, disturbances of the peace and the dacint
+love of a clane shirt. Ye do your work, and ye swallow the kerosene
+ile and rubber pipestems dished up to ye by the Dago cook for food.
+Ye light your pipeful, and say to yoursilf, "Nixt week I'll break
+away," and ye go to sleep and call yersilf a liar, for ye know ye'll
+never do it.'
+
+"'Who is this general man,' asks I, 'that calls himself De Vega?'
+
+"''Tis the man,' says Halloran, 'who is tryin' to complete
+the finishin' of the railroad. 'Twas the project of a private
+corporation, but it busted, and then the government took it up. De
+Vegy is a big politician, and wants to be prisident. The people want
+the railroad completed, as they're taxed mighty on account of it. The
+De Vegy man is pushin' it along as a campaign move.'
+
+"''Tis not my way,' says I, 'to make threats against any man, but
+there's an account to be settled between the railroad man and James
+O'Dowd Clancy.'
+
+"''Twas that way I thought, mesilf, at first,' Halloran says, with a
+big sigh, 'until I got to be a lettuce-eater. The fault's wid these
+tropics. They rejuices a man's system. 'Tis a land, as the poet says,
+"Where it always seems to be after dinner." I does me work and smokes
+me pipe and sleeps. There's little else in life, anyway. Ye'll get
+that way yersilf, mighty soon. Don't be harbourin' any sintiments at
+all, Clancy.'
+
+"'I can't help it,' says I; 'I'm full of 'em. I enlisted in the
+revolutionary army of this dark country in good faith to fight for
+its liberty, honours and silver candlesticks; instead of which I
+am set to amputatin' its scenery and grubbin' its roots. 'Tis the
+general man will have to pay for it.'
+
+"Two months I worked on that railroad before I found a chance to get
+away. One day a gang of us was sent back to the end of the completed
+line to fetch some picks that had been sent down to Port Barrios to
+be sharpened. They were brought on a hand-car, and I noticed, when I
+started away, that the car was left there on the track.
+
+"That night, about twelve, I woke up Halloran and told him my scheme.
+
+"'Run away?' says Halloran. 'Good Lord, Clancy, do ye mean it? Why, I
+ain't got the nerve. It's too chilly, and I ain't slept enough. Run
+away? I told you, Clancy, I've eat the lettuce. I've lost my grip.
+'Tis the tropics that's done it. 'Tis like the poet says: "Forgotten
+are our friends that we have left behind; in the hollow lettuce-land
+we will live and lay reclined." You better go on, Clancy. I'll stay,
+I guess. It's too early and cold, and I'm sleepy.'
+
+"So I had to leave Halloran. I dressed quiet, and slipped out of the
+tent we were in. When the guard came along I knocked him over, like
+a ninepin, with a green cocoanut I had, and made for the railroad.
+I got on that hand-car and made it fly. 'Twas yet a while before
+daybreak when I saw the lights of Port Barrios about a mile away. I
+stopped the hand-car there and walked to the town. I stepped inside
+the corporations of that town with care and hesitations. I was not
+afraid of the army of Guatemala, but me soul quaked at the prospect
+of a hand-to-hand struggle with its employment bureau. 'Tis a country
+that hires its help easy and keeps 'em long. Sure I can fancy Missis
+America and Missis Guatemala passin' a bit of gossip some fine, still
+night across the mountains. 'Oh, dear,' says Missis America, 'and
+it's a lot of trouble I'm havin' ag'in with the help, seora, ma'am.'
+'Laws, now!' says Missis Guatemala, 'you don't say so, ma'am! Now,
+mine never think of leavin' me--te-he! ma'am,' snickers Missis
+Guatemala.
+
+"I was wonderin' how I was goin' to move away from them tropics
+without bein' hired again. Dark as it was, I could see a steamer
+ridin' in the harbour, with smoke emergin' from her stacks. I turned
+down a little grass street that run down to the water. On the beach I
+found a little brown nigger-man just about to shove off in a skiff.
+
+"'Hold on, Sambo,' says I, 'savve English?'
+
+"'Heap plenty, yes,' says he, with a pleasant grin.
+
+"'What steamer is that?' I asks him, 'and where is it going? And
+what's the news, and the good word and the time of day?'
+
+"'That steamer the _Conchita_,' said the brown man, affable and easy,
+rollin' a cigarette. 'Him come from New Orleans for load banana. Him
+got load last night. I think him sail in one, two hour. Verree nice
+day we shall be goin' have. You hear some talkee 'bout big battle,
+maybe so? You think catchee General De Vega, seor? Yes? No?'
+
+"'How's that, Sambo?' says I. 'Big battle? What battle? Who wants
+catchee General De Vega? I've been up at my old gold mines in the
+interior for a couple of months, and haven't heard any news.'
+
+"'Oh,' says the nigger-man, proud to speak the English, 'verree great
+revolution in Guatemala one week ago. General De Vega, him try be
+president. Him raise armee--one--five--ten thousand mans for fight
+at the government. Those one government send five--forty--hundred
+thousand soldier to suppress revolution. They fight big battle
+yesterday at Lomagrande--that about nineteen or fifty mile in the
+mountain. That government soldier wheep General De Vega--oh, most
+bad. Five hundred--nine hundred--two thousand of his mans is kill.
+That revolution is smash suppress--bust--very quick. General De Vega,
+him r-r-run away fast on one big mule. Yes, _carrambos!_ The general,
+him r-r-run away, and his armee is kill. That government soldier,
+they try find General De Vega verree much. They want catchee him for
+shoot. You think they catchee that general, seor?'
+
+"'Saints grant it!' says I. ''Twould be the judgment of Providence
+for settin' the warlike talent of a Clancy to gradin' the tropics
+with a pick and shovel. But 'tis not so much a question of
+insurrections now, me little man, as 'tis of the hired-man problem.
+'Tis anxious I am to resign a situation of responsibility and trust
+with the white wings department of your great and degraded country.
+Row me in your little boat out to that steamer, and I'll give ye five
+dollars--sinker pacers--sinker pacers,' says I, reducin' the offer to
+the language and denomination of the tropic dialects.
+
+"'_Cinco pesos_,' repeats the little man. 'Five dollee, you give?'
+
+"'Twas not such a bad little man. He had hesitations at first, sayin'
+that passengers leavin' the country had to have papers and passports,
+but at last he took me out alongside the steamer.
+
+"Day was just breakin' as we struck her, and there wasn't a soul to
+be seen on board. The water was very still, and the nigger-man gave
+me a lift from the boat, and I climbed onto the steamer where her
+side was sliced to the deck for loadin' fruit. The hatches was open,
+and I looked down and saw the cargo of bananas that filled the hold
+to within six feet of the top. I thinks to myself, 'Clancy, you
+better go as a stowaway. It's safer. The steamer men might hand you
+back to the employment bureau. The tropic'll get you, Clancy, if you
+don't watch out.'
+
+"So I jumps down easy among the bananas, and digs out a hole to hide
+in among the bunches. In an hour or so I could hear the engines
+goin', and feel the steamer rockin', and I knew we were off to sea.
+They left the hatches open for ventilation, and pretty soon it
+was light enough in the hold to see fairly well. I got to feelin'
+a bit hungry, and thought I'd have a light fruit lunch, by way
+of refreshment. I creeped out of the hole I'd made and stood up
+straight. Just then I saw another man crawl up about ten feet away
+and reach out and skin a banana and stuff it into his mouth. 'Twas
+a dirty man, black-faced and ragged and disgraceful of aspect. Yes,
+the man was a ringer for the pictures of the fat Weary Willie in the
+funny papers. I looked again, and saw it was my general man--De Vega,
+the great revolutionist, mule-rider and pickaxe importer. When he saw
+me the general hesitated with his mouth filled with banana and his
+eyes the size of cocoanuts.
+
+"'Hist!' I says. 'Not a word, or they'll put us off and make us walk.
+"Veev la Liberty!"' I adds, copperin' the sentiment by shovin' a
+banana into the source of it. I was certain the general wouldn't
+recognize me. The nefarious work of the tropics had left me lookin'
+different. There was half an inch of roan whiskers coverin' me face,
+and me costume was a pair of blue overalls and a red shirt.
+
+"'How you come in the ship, seor?' asked the general as soon as he
+could speak.
+
+"'By the back door--whist!' says I. ''Twas a glorious blow for
+liberty we struck,' I continues; 'but we was overpowered by numbers.
+Let us accept our defeat like brave men and eat another banana.'
+
+"'Were you in the cause of liberty fightin', seor?' says the
+general, sheddin' tears on the cargo.
+
+"'To the last,' says I. ''Twas I led the last desperate charge
+against the minions of the tyrant. But it made them mad, and we was
+forced to retreat. 'Twas I, general, procured the mule upon which
+you escaped. Could you give that ripe bunch a little boost this way,
+general? It's a bit out of my reach. Thanks.'
+
+"'Say you so, brave patriot?' said the general, again weepin'. 'Ah,
+_Dios!_ And I have not the means to reward your devotion. Barely did
+I my life bring away. _Carrambos!_ what a devil's animal was that
+mule, seor! Like ships in one storm was I dashed about. The skin
+on myself was ripped away with the thorns and vines. Upon the bark
+of a hundred trees did that beast of the infernal bump, and cause
+outrage to the legs of mine. In the night to Port Barrios I came. I
+dispossess myself of that mountain of mule and hasten along the water
+shore. I find a little boat to be tied. I launch myself and row to
+the steamer. I cannot see any mans on board, so I climbed one rope
+which hang at the side. I then myself hide in the bananas. Surely, I
+say, if the ship captains view me, they shall throw me again to those
+Guatemala. Those things are not good. Guatemala will shoot General
+De Vega. Therefore, I am hide and remain silent. Life itself is
+glorious. Liberty, it is pretty good; but so good as life I do not
+think.'
+
+"Three days, as I said, was the trip to New Orleans. The general man
+and me got to be cronies of the deepest dye. Bananas we ate until
+they were distasteful to the sight and an eyesore to the palate, but
+to bananas alone was the bill of fare reduced. At night I crawls out,
+careful, on the lower deck, and gets a bucket of fresh water.
+
+"That General De Vega was a man inhabited by an engorgement of words
+and sentences. He added to the monotony of the voyage by divestin'
+himself of conversation. He believed I was a revolutionist of his own
+party, there bein', as he told me, a good many Americans and other
+foreigners in its ranks. 'Twas a braggart and a conceited little
+gabbler it was, though he considered himself a hero. 'Twas on himself
+he wasted all his regrets at the failin' of his plot. Not a word did
+the little balloon have to say about the other misbehavin' idiots
+that had been shot, or run themselves to death in his revolution.
+
+"The second day out he was feelin' pretty braggy and uppish for a
+stowed-away conspirator that owed his existence to a mule and stolen
+bananas. He was tellin' me about the great railroad he had been
+buildin', and he relates what he calls a comic incident about a fool
+Irishman he inveigled from New Orleans to sling a pick on his little
+morgue of a narrow-gauge line. 'Twas sorrowful to hear the little,
+dirty general tell the opprobrious story of how he put salt upon the
+tail of that reckless and silly bird, Clancy. Laugh, he did, hearty
+and long. He shook with laughin', the black-faced rebel and outcast,
+standin' neck-deep in bananas, without friends or country.
+
+"'Ah, seor,' he snickers, 'to the death you would have laughed at
+that drollest Irish. I say to him: "Strong, big mans is need very
+much in Guatemala." "I will blows strike for your down-pressed
+country," he say. "That shall you do," I tell him. Ah! it was an
+Irish so comic. He sees one box break upon the wharf that contain for
+the guard a few gun. He think there is gun in all the box. But that
+is all pickaxe. Yes. Ah! seor, could you the face of that Irish have
+seen when they set him to the work!'
+
+"'Twas thus the ex-boss of the employment bureau contributed to the
+tedium of the trip with merry jests and anecdote. But now and then he
+would weep upon the bananas and make oration about the lost cause of
+liberty and the mule.
+
+"'Twas a pleasant sound when the steamer bumped against the pier in
+New Orleans. Pretty soon we heard the pat-a-pat of hundreds of bare
+feet, and the Dago gang that unloads the fruit jumped on the deck and
+down into the hold. Me and the general worked a while at passin' up
+the bunches, and they thought we were part of the gang. After about
+an hour we managed to slip off the steamer onto the wharf.
+
+"'Twas a great honour on the hands of an obscure Clancy, havin' the
+entertainment of the representative of a great foreign filibusterin'
+power. I first bought for the general and myself many long drinks
+and things to eat that were not bananas. The general man trotted
+along at my side, leavin' all the arrangements to me. I led him
+up to Lafayette Square and set him on a bench in the little park.
+Cigarettes I had bought for him, and he humped himself down on the
+seat like a little, fat, contented hobo. I look him over as he sets
+there, and what I see pleases me. Brown by nature and instinct, he
+is now brindled with dirt and dust. Praise to the mule, his clothes
+is mostly strings and flaps. Yes, the looks of the general man is
+agreeable to Clancy.
+
+"I ask him, delicate, if, by any chance, he brought away anybody's
+money with him from Guatemala. He sighs and bumps his shoulders
+against the bench. Not a cent. All right. Maybe, he tells me, some
+of his friends in the tropic outfit will send him funds later. The
+general was as clear a case of no visible means as I ever saw.
+
+"I told him not to move from the bench, and then I went up to the
+corner of Poydras and Carondelet. Along there is O'Hara's beat. In
+five minutes along comes O'Hara, a big, fine man, red-faced, with
+shinin' buttons, swingin' his club. 'Twould be a fine thing for
+Guatemala to move into O'Hara's precinct. 'Twould be a fine bit of
+recreation for Danny to suppress revolutions and uprisin's once or
+twice a week with his club.
+
+"'Is 5046 workin' yet, Danny?' says I, walkin' up to him.
+
+"'Overtime,' says O'Hara, lookin' over me suspicious. 'Want some of
+it?'
+
+"Fifty-forty-six is the celebrated city ordinance authorizin' arrest,
+conviction and imprisonment of persons that succeed in concealin'
+their crimes from the police.
+
+"'Don't ye know Jimmy Clancy?' says I. 'Ye pink-gilled monster.' So,
+when O'Hara recognized me beneath the scandalous exterior bestowed
+upon me by the tropics, I backed him into a doorway and told him what
+I wanted, and why I wanted it. 'All right, Jimmy,' says O'Hara. 'Go
+back and hold the bench. I'll be along in ten minutes.'
+
+"In that time O'Hara strolled through Lafayette Square and spied two
+Weary Willies disgracin' one of the benches. In ten minutes more J.
+Clancy and General De Vega, late candidate for the presidency of
+Guatemala, was in the station house. The general is badly frightened,
+and calls upon me to proclaim his distinguishments and rank.
+
+"'The man,' says I to the police, 'used to be a railroad man. He's on
+the bum now. 'Tis a little bughouse he is, on account of losin' his
+job.'
+
+"'_Carrambos!_' says the general, fizzin' like a little soda-water
+fountain, 'you fought, seor, with my forces in my native country.
+Why do you say the lies? You shall say I am the General De Vega, one
+soldier, one _caballero_--'
+
+"'Railroader,' says I again. 'On the hog. No good. Been livin' for
+three days on stolen bananas. Look at him. Ain't that enough?'
+
+"Twenty-five dollars or sixty days, was what the recorder gave the
+general. He didn't have a cent, so he took the time. They let me go,
+as I knew they would, for I had money to show, and O'Hara spoke for
+me. Yes; sixty days he got. 'Twas just so long that I slung a pick
+for the great country of Kam--Guatemala."
+
+Clancy paused. The bright starlight showed a reminiscent look of
+happy content on his seasoned features. Keogh leaned in his chair and
+gave his partner a slap on his thinly-clad back that sounded like the
+crack of the surf on the sands.
+
+"Tell 'em, ye divil," he chuckled, "how you got even with the
+tropical general in the way of agricultural manoeuvrings."
+
+"Havin' no money," concluded Clancy, with unction, "they set him
+to work his fine out with a gang from the parish prison clearing
+Ursulines Street. Around the corner was a saloon decorated genially
+with electric fans and cool merchandise. I made that me headquarters,
+and every fifteen minutes I'd walk around and take a look at the
+little man filibusterin' with a rake and shovel. 'Twas just such
+a hot broth of a day as this has been. And I'd call at him 'Hey,
+monseer!' and he'd look at me black, with the damp showin' through
+his shirt in places.
+
+"'Fat, strong mans,' says I to General De Vega, 'is needed in New
+Orleans. Yes. To carry on the good work. Carrambos! Erin go bragh!'"
+
+
+
+
+XI
+
+THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE
+
+
+Breakfast in Coralio was at eleven. Therefore the people did not go
+to market early. The little wooden market-house stood on a patch of
+short-trimmed grass, under the vivid green foliage of a bread-fruit
+tree.
+
+Thither one morning the venders leisurely convened, bringing their
+wares with them. A porch or platform six feet wide encircled the
+building, shaded from the mid-morning sun by the projecting,
+grass-thatched roof. Upon this platform the venders were wont to
+display their goods--newly-killed beef, fish, crabs, fruit of the
+country, cassava, eggs, _dulces_ and high, tottering stacks of native
+tortillas as large around as the sombrero of a Spanish grandee.
+
+But on this morning they whose stations lay on the seaward side of
+the market-house, instead of spreading their merchandise formed
+themselves into a softly jabbering and gesticulating group. For
+there upon their space of the platform was sprawled, asleep, the
+unbeautiful figure of "Beelzebub" Blythe. He lay upon a ragged strip
+of cocoa matting, more than ever a fallen angel in appearance. His
+suit of coarse flax, soiled, bursting at the seams, crumpled into
+a thousand diversified wrinkles and creases, inclosed him absurdly,
+like the garb of some effigy that had been stuffed in sport and
+thrown there after indignity had been wrought upon it. But firmly
+upon the high bridge of his nose reposed his gold-rimmed glasses, the
+surviving badge of his ancient glory.
+
+The sun's rays, reflecting quiveringly from the rippling sea upon his
+face, and the voices of the market-men woke "Beelzebub" Blythe. He
+sat up, blinking, and leaned his back against the wall of the market.
+Drawing a blighted silk handkerchief from his pocket, he assiduously
+rubbed and burnished his glasses. And while doing this he became
+aware that his bedroom had been invaded, and that polite brown and
+yellow men were beseeching him to vacate in favour of their market
+stuff.
+
+If the seor would have the goodness--a thousand pardons for bringing
+to him molestation--but soon would come the _compradores_ for the
+day's provisions--surely they had ten thousand regrets at disturbing
+him!
+
+In this manner they expanded to him the intimation that he must clear
+out and cease to clog the wheels of trade.
+
+Blythe stepped from the platform with the air of a prince leaving
+his canopied couch. He never quite lost that air, even at the lowest
+point of his fall. It is clear that the college of good breeding does
+not necessarily maintain a chair of morals within its walls.
+
+Blythe shook out his wry clothing, and moved slowly up the Calle
+Grande through the hot sand. He moved without a destination in his
+mind. The little town was languidly stirring to its daily life.
+Golden-skinned babies tumbled over one another in the grass. The sea
+breeze brought him appetite, but nothing to satisfy it. Throughout
+Coralio were its morning odors--those from the heavily fragrant
+tropical flowers and from the bread baking in the outdoor ovens of
+clay and the pervading smoke of their fires. Where the smoke cleared,
+the crystal air, with some of the efficacy of faith, seemed to remove
+the mountains almost to the sea, bringing them so near that one might
+count the scarred glades on their wooded sides. The light-footed
+Caribs were swiftly gliding to their tasks at the waterside. Already
+along the bosky trails from the banana groves files of horses were
+slowly moving, concealed, except for their nodding heads and plodding
+legs, by the bunches of green-golden fruit heaped upon their backs.
+On doorsills sat women combing their long, black hair and calling,
+one to another, across the narrow thoroughfares. Peace reigned in
+Coralio--arid and bald peace; but still peace.
+
+On that bright morning when Nature seemed to be offering the lotus on
+the Dawn's golden platter "Beelzebub" Blythe had reached rock bottom.
+Further descent seemed impossible. That last night's slumber in
+a public place had done for him. As long as he had had a roof to
+cover him there had remained, unbridged, the space that separates a
+gentleman from the beasts of the jungle and the fowls of the air. But
+now he was little more than a whimpering oyster led to be devoured on
+the sands of a Southern sea by the artful walrus, Circumstance, and
+the implacable carpenter, Fate.
+
+To Blythe money was now but a memory. He had drained his friends of
+all that their good-fellowship had to offer; then he had squeezed
+them to the last drop of their generosity; and at the last,
+Aaron-like, he had smitten the rock of their hardening bosoms for the
+scattering, ignoble drops of Charity itself.
+
+He had exhausted his credit to the last _real_. With the minute
+keenness of the shameless sponger he was aware of every source in
+Coralio from which a glass of rum, a meal or a piece of silver could
+be wheedled. Marshalling each such source in his mind, he considered
+it with all the thoroughness and penetration that hunger and thirst
+lent him for the task. All his optimism failed to thresh a grain of
+hope from the chaff of his postulations. He had played out the game.
+That one night in the open had shaken his nerves. Until then there
+had been left to him at least a few grounds upon which he could base
+his unblushing demands upon his neighbours' stores. Now he must beg
+instead of borrowing. The most brazen sophistry could not dignify by
+the name of "loan" the coin contemptuously flung to a beachcomber who
+slept on the bare boards of the public market.
+
+But on this morning no beggar would have more thankfully received
+a charitable coin, for the demon thirst had him by the throat--the
+drunkard's matutinal thirst that requires to be slaked at each
+morning station on the road to Tophet.
+
+Blythe walked slowly up the street, keeping a watchful eye for any
+miracle that might drop manna upon him in his wilderness. As he
+passed the popular eating house of Madama Vasquez, Madama's boarders
+were just sitting down to freshly-baked bread, _aguacates_, pines and
+delicious coffee that sent forth odorous guarantee of its quality
+upon the breeze. Madama was serving; she turned her shy, stolid,
+melancholy gaze for a moment out the window; she saw Blythe, and her
+expression turned more shy and embarrassed. "Beelzebub" owed her
+twenty _pesos_. He bowed as he had once bowed to less embarrassed
+dames to whom he owed nothing, and passed on.
+
+Merchants and their clerks were throwing open the solid wooden doors
+of their shops. Polite but cool were the glances they cast upon
+Blythe as he lounged tentatively by with the remains of his old
+jaunty air; for they were his creditors almost without exception.
+
+At the little fountain in the _plaza_ he made an apology for a toilet
+with his wetted handkerchief. Across the open square filed the
+dolorous line of friends of the prisoners in the _calaboza_, bearing
+the morning meal of the immured. The food in their hands aroused
+small longing in Blythe. It was drink that his soul craved, or money
+to buy it.
+
+In the streets he met many with whom he had been friends and equals,
+and whose patience and liberality he had gradually exhausted.
+Willard Geddie and Paula cantered past him with the coolest of nods,
+returning from their daily horseback ride along the old Indian road.
+Keogh passed him at another corner, whistling cheerfully and bearing
+a prize of newly-laid eggs for the breakfast of himself and Clancy.
+The jovial scout of Fortune was one of Blythe's victims who had
+plunged his hand oftenest into his pocket to aid him. But now it
+seemed that Keogh, too, had fortified himself against further
+invasions. His curt greeting and the ominous light in his full, grey
+eye quickened the steps of "Beelzebub," whom desperation had almost
+incited to attempt an additional "loan."
+
+Three drinking shops the forlorn one next visited in succession. In
+all of these his money, his credit and his welcome had long since
+been spent; but Blythe felt that he would have fawned in the dust at
+the feet of an enemy that morning for one draught of _aguardiente_.
+In two of the _pulperias_ his courageous petition for drink was met
+with a refusal so polite that it stung worse than abuse. The third
+establishment had acquired something of American methods; and here he
+was seized bodily and cast out upon his hands and knees.
+
+This physical indignity caused a singular change in the man. As he
+picked himself up and walked away, an expression of absolute relief
+came upon his features. The specious and conciliatory smile that
+had been graven there was succeeded by a look of calm and sinister
+resolve. "Beelzebub" had been floundering in the sea of improbity,
+holding by a slender life-line to the respectable world that had
+cast him overboard. He must have felt that with this ultimate shock
+the line had snapped, and have experienced the welcome ease of the
+drowning swimmer who has ceased to struggle.
+
+Blythe walked to the next corner and stood there while he brushed the
+sand from his garments and re-polished his glasses.
+
+"I've got to do it--oh, I've got to do it," he told himself, aloud.
+"If I had a quart of rum I believe I could stave it off yet--for a
+little while. But there's no more rum for--'Beelzebub,' as they call
+me. By the flames of Tartarus! if I'm to sit at the right hand of
+Satan somebody has got to pay the court expenses. You'll have to pony
+up, Mr. Frank Goodwin. You're a good fellow; but a gentleman must
+draw the line at being kicked into the gutter. Blackmail isn't a
+pretty word, but it's the next station on the road I'm travelling."
+
+With purpose in his steps Blythe now moved rapidly through the town
+by way of its landward environs. He passed through the squalid
+quarters of the improvident negroes and on beyond the picturesque
+shacks of the poorer _mestizos_. From many points along his course he
+could see, through the umbrageous glades, the house of Frank Goodwin
+on its wooded hill. And as he crossed the little bridge over the
+lagoon he saw the old Indian, Galvez, scrubbing at the wooden slab
+that bore the name of Miraflores. Beyond the lagoon the lands of
+Goodwin began to slope gently upward. A grassy road, shaded by a
+munificent and diverse array of tropical flora wound from the edge of
+an outlying banana grove to the dwelling. Blythe took this road with
+long and purposeful strides.
+
+Goodwin was seated on his coolest gallery, dictating letters to his
+secretary, a sallow and capable native youth. The household adhered
+to the American plan of breakfast; and that meal had been a thing of
+the past for the better part of an hour.
+
+The castaway walked to the steps, and flourished a hand.
+
+"Good morning, Blythe," said Goodwin, looking up. "Come in and have a
+chair. Anything I can do for you?"
+
+"I want to speak to you in private."
+
+Goodwin nodded at his secretary, who strolled out under a mango tree
+and lit a cigarette. Blythe took the chair that he had left vacant.
+
+"I want some money," he began, doggedly.
+
+"I'm sorry," said Goodwin, with equal directness, "but you can't have
+any. You're drinking yourself to death, Blythe. Your friends have
+done all they could to help you to brace up. You won't help yourself.
+There's no use furnishing you with money to ruin yourself with any
+longer."
+
+"Dear man," said Blythe, tilting back his chair, "it isn't a question
+of social economy now. It's past that. I like you, Goodwin; and I've
+come to stick a knife between your ribs. I was kicked out of Espada's
+saloon this morning; and Society owes me reparation for my wounded
+feelings."
+
+"I didn't kick you out."
+
+"No; but in a general way you represent Society; and in a particular
+way you represent my last chance. I've had to come down to it, old
+man--I tried to do it a month ago when Losada's man was here turning
+things over; but I couldn't do it then. Now it's different. I want a
+thousand dollars, Goodwin; and you'll have to give it to me."
+
+"Only last week," said Goodwin, with a smile, "a silver dollar was
+all you were asking for."
+
+"An evidence," said Blythe, flippantly, "that I was still
+virtuous--though under heavy pressure. The wages of sin should be
+something higher than a _peso_ worth forty-eight cents. Let's talk
+business. I am the villain in the third act; and I must have my
+merited, if only temporary, triumph. I saw you collar the late
+president's valiseful of boodle. Oh, I know it's blackmail; but I'm
+liberal about the price. I know I'm a cheap villain--one of the
+regular sawmill-drama kind--but you're one of my particular friends,
+and I don't want to stick you hard."
+
+"Suppose you go into the details," suggested Goodwin, calmly
+arranging his letters on the table.
+
+"All right," said "Beelzebub." "I like the way you take it. I despise
+histrionics; so you will please prepare yourself for the facts
+without any red fire, calcium or grace notes on the saxophone.
+
+"On the night that His Fly-by-night Excellency arrived in town I
+was very drunk. You will excuse the pride with which I state that
+fact; but it was quite a feat for me to attain that desirable state.
+Somebody had left a cot out under the orange trees in the yard of
+Madama Ortiz's hotel. I stepped over the wall, laid down upon it, and
+fell asleep. I was awakened by an orange that dropped from the tree
+upon my nose; and I laid there for awhile cursing Sir Isaac Newton,
+or whoever it was that invented gravitation, for not confining his
+theory to apples.
+
+"And then along came Mr. Miraflores and his true-love with the
+treasury in a valise, and went into the hotel. Next you hove in
+sight, and held a pow-wow with the tonsorial artist who insisted upon
+talking shop after hours. I tried to slumber again; but once more my
+rest was disturbed--this time by the noise of the popgun that went
+off upstairs. Then that valise came crashing down into an orange
+tree just above my head; and I arose from my couch, not knowing
+when it might begin to rain Saratoga trunks. When the army and the
+constabulary began to arrive, with their medals and decorations
+hastily pinned to their pajamas, and their snickersnees drawn, I
+crawled into the welcome shadow of a banana plant. I remained there
+for an hour, by which time the excitement and the people had cleared
+away. And then, my dear Goodwin--excuse me--I saw you sneak back and
+pluck that ripe and juicy valise from the orange tree. I followed
+you, and saw you take it to your own house. A hundred-thousand-dollar
+crop from one orange tree in a season about breaks the record of the
+fruit-growing industry.
+
+"Being a gentleman at that time, of course, I never mentioned the
+incident to anyone. But this morning I was kicked out of a saloon,
+my code of honour is all out at the elbows, and I'd sell my mother's
+prayer-book for three fingers of _aguardiente_. I'm not putting on
+the screws hard. It ought to be worth a thousand to you for me to
+have slept on that cot through the whole business without waking up
+and seeing anything."
+
+Goodwin opened two more letters, and made memoranda in pencil on
+them. Then he called "Manuel!" to his secretary, who came, spryly.
+
+"The _Ariel_--when does she sail?" asked Goodwin.
+
+"Seor," answered the youth, "at three this afternoon. She drops
+down-coast to Punta Soledad to complete her cargo of fruit. From
+there she sails for New Orleans without delay."
+
+"_Bueno!_" said Goodwin. "These letters may wait yet awhile."
+
+The secretary returned to his cigarette under the mango tree.
+
+"In round numbers," said Goodwin, facing Blythe squarely, "how much
+money do you owe in this town, not including the sums you have
+'borrowed' from me?"
+
+"Five hundred--at a rough guess," answered Blythe, lightly.
+
+"Go somewhere in the town and draw up a schedule of your debts," said
+Goodwin. "Come back here in two hours, and I will send Manuel with
+the money to pay them. I will also have a decent outfit of clothing
+ready for you. You will sail on the _Ariel_ at three. Manuel will
+accompany you as far as the deck of the steamer. There he will hand
+you one thousand dollars in cash. I suppose that we needn't discuss
+what you will be expected to do in return."
+
+"Oh, I understand," piped Blythe, cheerily. "I was asleep all the
+time on the cot under Madama Ortiz's orange trees; and I shake off
+the dust of Coralio forever. I'll play fair. No more of the lotus
+for me. Your proposition is O. K. You're a good fellow, Goodwin;
+and I let you off light. I'll agree to everything. But in the
+meantime--I've a devil of a thirst on, old man--"
+
+"Not a _centavo_," said Goodwin, firmly, "until you are on board the
+_Ariel_. You would be drunk in thirty minutes if you had money now."
+
+But he noticed the blood-streaked eyeballs, the relaxed form and the
+shaking hands of "Beelzebub;" and he stepped into the dining room
+through the low window, and brought out a glass and a decanter of
+brandy.
+
+"Take a bracer, anyway, before you go," he proposed, even as a man to
+the friend whom he entertains.
+
+"Beelzebub" Blythe's eyes glistened at the sight of the solace for
+which his soul burned. To-day for the first time his poisoned nerves
+had been denied their steadying dose; and their retort was a mounting
+torment. He grasped the decanter and rattled its crystal mouth
+against the glass in his trembling hand. He flushed the glass, and
+then stood erect, holding it aloft for an instant. For one fleeting
+moment he held his head above the drowning waves of his abyss. He
+nodded easily at Goodwin, raised his brimming glass and murmured a
+"health" that men had used in his ancient Paradise Lost. And then so
+suddenly that he spilled the brandy over his hand, he set down his
+glass, untasted.
+
+"In two hours," his dry lips muttered to Goodwin, as he marched down
+the steps and turned his face toward the town.
+
+In the edge of the cool banana grove "Beelzebub" halted, and snapped
+the tongue of his belt buckle into another hole.
+
+"I couldn't do it," he explained, feverishly, to the waving banana
+fronds. "I wanted to, but I couldn't. A gentleman can't drink with
+the man that he blackmails."
+
+
+
+
+XII
+
+SHOES
+
+
+John De Graffenreid Atwood ate of the lotus, root, stem, and flower.
+The tropics gobbled him up. He plunged enthusiastically into his
+work, which was to try to forget Rosine.
+
+Now, they who dine on the lotus rarely consume it plain. There is a
+sauce _au diable_ that goes with it; and the distillers are the chefs
+who prepare it. And on Johnny's menu card it read "brandy." With a
+bottle between them, he and Billy Keogh would sit on the porch of the
+little consulate at night and roar out great, indecorous songs, until
+the natives, slipping hastily past, would shrug a shoulder and mutter
+things to themselves about the "_Americanos diablos_."
+
+One day Johnny's _mozo_ brought the mail and dumped it on the table.
+Johnny leaned from his hammock, and fingered the four or five
+letters dejectedly. Keogh was sitting on the edge of the table
+chopping lazily with a paper knife at the legs of a centipede that
+was crawling among the stationery. Johnny was in that phase of
+lotus-eating when all the world tastes bitter in one's mouth.
+
+"Same old thing!" he complained. "Fool people writing for information
+about the country. They want to know all about raising fruit, and how
+to make a fortune without work. Half of 'em don't even send stamps
+for a reply. They think a consul hasn't anything to do but write
+letters. Slit those envelopes for me, old man, and see what they
+want. I'm feeling too rocky to move."
+
+Keogh, acclimated beyond all possibility of ill-humour, drew
+his chair to the table with smiling compliance on his rose-pink
+countenance, and began to slit open the letters. Four of them were
+from citizens in various parts of the United States who seemed to
+regard the consul at Coralio as a cyclopdia of information. They
+asked long lists of questions, numerically arranged, about the
+climate, products, possibilities, laws, business chances, and
+statistics of the country in which the consul had the honour of
+representing his own government.
+
+"Write 'em, please, Billy," said that inert official, "just a line,
+referring them to the latest consular report. Tell 'em the State
+Department will be delighted to furnish the literary gems. Sign my
+name. Don't let your pen scratch, Billy; it'll keep me awake."
+
+"Don't snore," said Keogh, amiably, "and I'll do your work for you.
+You need a corps of assistants, anyhow. Don't see how you ever get
+out a report. Wake up a minute!--here's one more letter--it's from
+your own town, too--Dalesburg."
+
+"That so?" murmured Johnny showing a mild and obligatory interest.
+"What's it about?"
+
+"Postmaster writes," explained Keogh. "Says a citizen of the town
+wants some facts and advice from you. Says the citizen has an idea in
+his head of coming down where you are and opening a shoe store. Wants
+to know if you think the business would pay. Says he's heard of the
+boom along this coast, and wants to get in on the ground floor."
+
+In spite of the heat and his bad temper, Johnny's hammock swayed
+with his laughter. Keogh laughed too; and the pet monkey on the top
+shelf of the bookcase chattered in shrill sympathy with the ironical
+reception of the letter from Dalesburg.
+
+"Great bunions!" exclaimed the consul. "Shoe store! What'll they ask
+about next, I wonder? Overcoat factory, I reckon. Say, Billy--of our
+3,000 citizens, how many do you suppose ever had on a pair of shoes?"
+
+Keogh reflected judicially.
+
+"Let's see--there's you and me and--"
+
+"Not me," said Johnny, promptly and incorrectly, holding up a foot
+encased in a disreputable deerskin _zapato_. "I haven't been a victim
+to shoes in months."
+
+"But you've got 'em, though," went on Keogh. "And there's Goodwin
+and Blanchard and Geddie and old Lutz and Doc Gregg and that Italian
+that's agent for the banana company, and there's old Delgado--no;
+he wears sandals. And, oh, yes; there's Madama Ortiz, 'what kapes
+the hotel'--she had on a pair of red slippers at the _baile_ the
+other night. And Miss Pasa, her daughter, that went to school in
+the States--she brought back some civilized notions in the way of
+footgear. And there's the _comandante's_ sister that dresses up her
+feet on feast-days--and Mrs. Geddie, who wears a two with a Castilian
+instep--and that's about all the ladies. Let's see--don't some of the
+soldiers at the _cuartel_--no: that's so; they're allowed shoes only
+when on the march. In barracks they turn their little toeses out to
+grass."
+
+"'Bout right," agreed the consul. "Not over twenty out of the three
+thousand ever felt leather on their walking arrangements. Oh, yes;
+Coralio is just the town for an enterprising shoe store--that doesn't
+want to part with its goods. Wonder if old Patterson is trying to
+jolly me! He always was full of things he called jokes. Write him a
+letter, Billy. I'll dictate it. We'll jolly him back a few."
+
+Keogh dipped his pen, and wrote at Johnny's dictation. With many
+pauses, filled in with smoke and sundry travellings of the bottle
+and glasses, the following reply to the Dalesburg communication was
+perpetrated:
+
+
+ MR. OBADIAH PATTERSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+
+ _Dear Sir:_ In reply to your favour of July 2d, I have the
+ honour to inform you that, according to my opinion, there
+ is no place on the habitable globe that presents to the eye
+ stronger evidence of the need of a first-class shoe store
+ than does the town of Coralio. There are 3,000 inhabitants
+ in the place, and not a single shoe store! The situation
+ speaks for itself. This coast is rapidly becoming the goal
+ of enterprising business men, but the shoe business is one
+ that has been sadly overlooked or neglected. In fact, there
+ are a considerable number of our citizens actually without
+ shoes at present.
+
+ Besides the want above mentioned, there is also a crying
+ need for a brewery, a college of higher mathematics, a coal
+ yard, and a clean and intellectual Punch and Judy show. I
+ have the honour to be, sir,
+
+ Your Obt. Servant,
+
+ JOHN DE GRAFFENREID ATWOOD,
+ U. S. Consul at Coralio.
+
+ P.S.--Hello! Uncle Obadiah. How's the old burg racking
+ along? What would the government do without you and me?
+ Look out for a green-headed parrot and a bunch of bananas
+ soon, from your old friend
+
+ JOHNNY.
+
+
+"I throw in that postscript," explained the consul, "so Uncle Obadiah
+won't take offence at the official tone of the letter! Now, Billy,
+you get that correspondence fixed up, and send Pancho to the
+post-office with it. The _Ariadne_ takes the mail out to-morrow if
+they make up that load of fruit to-day."
+
+The night programme in Coralio never varied. The recreations of the
+people were soporific and flat. They wandered about, barefoot and
+aimless, speaking lowly and smoking cigar or cigarette. Looking
+down on the dimly lighted ways one seemed to see a threading maze
+of brunette ghosts tangled with a procession of insane fireflies.
+In some houses the thrumming of lugubrious guitars added to the
+depression of the _triste_ night. Giant tree-frogs rattled in the
+foliage as loudly as the end man's "bones" in a minstrel troupe. By
+nine o'clock the streets were almost deserted.
+
+Nor at the consulate was there often a change of bill. Keogh would
+come there nightly, for Coralio's one cool place was the little
+seaward porch of that official residence.
+
+The brandy would be kept moving; and before midnight sentiment would
+begin to stir in the heart of the self-exiled consul. Then he would
+relate to Keogh the story of his ended romance. Each night Keogh
+would listen patiently to the tale, and be ready with untiring
+sympathy.
+
+"But don't you think for a minute"--thus Johnny would always conclude
+his woeful narrative--"that I'm grieving about that girl, Billy. I've
+forgotten her. She never enters my mind. If she were to enter that
+door right now, my pulse wouldn't gain a beat. That's all over long
+ago."
+
+"Don't I know it?" Keogh would answer. "Of course you've forgotten
+her. Proper thing to do. Wasn't quite O. K. of her to listen to the
+knocks that--er--Dink Pawson kept giving you."
+
+"Pink Dawson!"--a world of contempt would be in Johnny's tones--"Poor
+white trash! That's what he was. Had five hundred acres of farming
+land, though; and that counted. Maybe I'll have a chance to get back
+at him some day. The Dawsons weren't anybody. Everybody in Alabama
+knows the Atwoods. Say, Billy--did you know my mother was a De
+Graffenreid?"
+
+"Why, no," Keogh would say; "is that so?" He had heard it some three
+hundred times.
+
+"Fact. The De Graffenreids of Hancock County. But I never think of
+that girl any more, do I, Billy?"
+
+"Not for a minute, my boy," would be the last sounds heard by the
+conqueror of Cupid.
+
+At this point Johnny would fall into a gentle slumber, and Keogh
+would saunter out to his own shack under the calabash tree at the
+edge of the plaza.
+
+In a day or two the letter from the Dalesburg postmaster and its
+answer had been forgotten by the Coralio exiles. But on the 26th day
+of July the fruit of the reply appeared upon the tree of events.
+
+The _Andador_, a fruit steamer that visited Coralio regularly, drew
+into the offing and anchored. The beach was lined with spectators
+while the quarantine doctor and the custom-house crew rowed out to
+attend to their duties.
+
+An hour later Billy Keogh lounged into the consulate, clean and cool
+in his linen clothes, and grinning like a pleased shark.
+
+"Guess what?" he said to Johnny, lounging in his hammock.
+
+"Too hot to guess," said Johnny, lazily.
+
+"Your shoe-store man's come," said Keogh, rolling the sweet morsel on
+his tongue, "with a stock of goods big enough to supply the continent
+as far down as Terra del Fuego. They're carting his cases over to
+the custom-house now. Six barges full they brought ashore and have
+paddled back for the rest. Oh, ye saints in glory! won't there
+be regalements in the air when he gets onto the joke and has an
+interview with Mr. Consul? It'll be worth nine years in the tropics
+just to witness that one joyful moment."
+
+Keogh loved to take his mirth easily. He selected a clean place
+on the matting and lay upon the floor. The walls shook with his
+enjoyment. Johnny turned half over and blinked.
+
+"Don't tell me," he said, "that anybody was fool enough to take that
+letter seriously."
+
+"Four-thousand-dollar stock of goods!" gasped Keogh, in ecstasy.
+"Talk about coals to Newcastle! Why didn't he take a ship-load of
+palm-leaf fans to Spitzbergen while he was about it? Saw the old
+codger on the beach. You ought to have been there when he put on his
+specs and squinted at the five hundred or so barefooted citizens
+standing around."
+
+"Are you telling the truth, Billy?" asked the consul, weakly.
+
+"Am I? You ought to see the buncoed gentleman's daughter he brought
+along. Looks! She makes the brick-dust seoritas here look like
+tar-babies."
+
+"Go on," said Johnny, "if you can stop that asinine giggling. I hate
+to see a grown man make a laughing hyena of himself."
+
+"Name is Hemstetter," went on Keogh. "He's a-- Hello! what's the
+matter now?"
+
+Johnny's moccasined feet struck the floor with a thud as he wriggled
+out of his hammock.
+
+"Get up, you idiot," he said, sternly, "or I'll brain you with this
+inkstand. That's Rosine and her father. Gad! what a drivelling idiot
+old Patterson is! Get up, here, Billy Keogh, and help me. What the
+devil are we going to do? Has all the world gone crazy?"
+
+Keogh rose and dusted himself. He managed to regain a decorous
+demeanour.
+
+"Situation has got to be met, Johnny," he said, with some success
+at seriousness. "I didn't think about its being your girl until you
+spoke. First thing to do is to get them comfortable quarters. You go
+down and face the music, and I'll trot out to Goodwin's and see if
+Mrs. Goodwin won't take them in. They've got the decentest house in
+town."
+
+"Bless you, Billy!" said the consul. "I knew you wouldn't desert me.
+The world's bound to come to an end, but maybe we can stave it off
+for a day or two."
+
+Keogh hoisted his umbrella and set out for Goodwin's house. Johnny
+put on his coat and hat. He picked up the brandy bottle, but set it
+down again without drinking, and marched bravely down to the beach.
+
+In the shade of the custom-house walls he found Mr. Hemstetter and
+Rosine surrounded by a mass of gaping citizens. The customs officers
+were ducking and scraping, while the captain of the _Andador_
+interpreted the business of the new arrivals. Rosine looked healthy
+and very much alive. She was gazing at the strange scenes around her
+with amused interest. There was a faint blush upon her round cheek as
+she greeted her old admirer. Mr. Hemstetter shook hands with Johnny
+in a very friendly way. He was an oldish, impractical man--one
+of that numerous class of erratic business men who are forever
+dissatisfied, and seeking a change.
+
+"I am very glad to see you, John--may I call you John?" he said. "Let
+me thank you for your prompt answer to our postmaster's letter of
+inquiry. He volunteered to write to you on my behalf. I was looking
+about for something different in the way of a business in which the
+profits would be greater. I had noticed in the papers that this coast
+was receiving much attention from investors. I am extremely grateful
+for your advice to come. I sold out everything that I possess, and
+invested the proceeds in as fine a stock of shoes as could be bought
+in the North. You have a picturesque town here, John. I hope business
+will be as good as your letter justifies me in expecting."
+
+Johnny's agony was abbreviated by the arrival of Keogh, who hurried
+up with the news that Mrs. Goodwin would be much pleased to place
+rooms at the disposal of Mr. Hemstetter and his daughter. So there
+Mr. Hemstetter and Rosine were at once conducted and left to
+recuperate from the fatigue of the voyage, while Johnny went down
+to see that the cases of shoes were safely stored in the customs
+warehouse pending their examination by the officials. Keogh, grinning
+like a shark, skirmished about to find Goodwin, to instruct him not
+to expose to Mr. Hemstetter the true state of Coralio as a shoe
+market until Johnny had been given a chance to redeem the situation,
+if such a thing were possible.
+
+That night the consul and Keogh held a desperate consultation on the
+breezy porch of the consulate.
+
+"Send 'em back home," began Keogh, reading Johnny's thoughts.
+
+"I would," said Johnny, after a little silence; "but I've been lying
+to you, Billy."
+
+"All right about that," said Keogh, affably.
+
+"I've told you hundreds of times," said Johnny, slowly, "that I had
+forgotten that girl, haven't I?"
+
+"About three hundred and seventy-five," admitted the monument of
+patience.
+
+"I lied," repeated the consul, "every time. I never forgot her for
+one minute. I was an obstinate ass for running away just because she
+said 'No' once. And I was too proud a fool to go back. I talked with
+Rosine a few minutes this evening up at Goodwin's. I found out one
+thing. You remember that farmer fellow who was always after her?"
+
+"Dink Pawson?" asked Keogh.
+
+"Pink Dawson. Well, he wasn't a hill of beans to her. She says she
+didn't believe a word of the things he told her about me. But I'm
+sewed up now, Billy. That tomfool letter we sent ruined whatever
+chance I had left. She'll despise me when she finds out that her old
+father has been made the victim of a joke that a decent school boy
+wouldn't have been guilty of. Shoes! Why he couldn't sell twenty
+pairs of shoes in Coralio if he kept store here for twenty years. You
+put a pair of shoes on one of these Caribs or Spanish brown boys and
+what'd he do? Stand on his head and squeal until he'd kicked 'em off.
+None of 'em ever wore shoes and they never will. If I send 'em back
+home I'll have to tell the whole story, and what'll she think of
+me? I want that girl worse than ever, Billy, and now when she's in
+reach I've lost her forever because I tried to be funny when the
+thermometer was at 102."
+
+"Keep cheerful," said the optimistic Keogh. "And let 'em open the
+store. I've been busy myself this afternoon. We can stir up a
+temporary boom in foot-gear anyhow. I'll buy six pairs when the doors
+open. I've been around and seen all the fellows and explained the
+catastrophe. They'll all buy shoes like they was centipedes. Frank
+Goodwin will take cases of 'em. The Geddies want about eleven pairs
+between 'em. Clancy is going to invest the savings of weeks, and even
+old Doc Gregg wants three pairs of alligator-hide slippers if they've
+got any tens. Blanchard got a look at Miss Hemstetter; and as he's a
+Frenchman, no less than a dozen pairs will do for him."
+
+"A dozen customers," said Johnny, "for a $4,000 stock of shoes! It
+won't work. There's a big problem here to figure out. You go home,
+Billy, and leave me alone. I've got to work at it all by myself. Take
+that bottle of Three-star along with you--no, sir; not another ounce
+of booze for the United States consul. I'll sit here to-night and
+pull out the think stop. If there's a soft place on this proposition
+anywhere I'll land on it. If there isn't there'll be another wreck to
+the credit of the gorgeous tropics."
+
+Keogh left, feeling that he could be of no use. Johnny laid a handful
+of cigars on a table and stretched himself in a steamer chair. When
+the sudden daylight broke, silvering the harbour ripples, he was
+still sitting there. Then he got up, whistling a little tune, and
+took his bath.
+
+At nine o'clock he walked down to the dingy little cable office and
+hung for half an hour over a blank. The result of his application was
+the following message, which he signed and had transmitted at a cost
+of $33:
+
+
+ TO PINKNEY DAWSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+
+ Draft for $100 comes to you next mail. Ship me immediately
+ 500 pounds stiff, dry cockleburrs. New use here in arts.
+ Market price twenty cents pound. Further orders likely.
+ Rush.
+
+
+
+
+XIII
+
+SHIPS
+
+
+Within a week a suitable building had been secured in the Calle
+Grande, and Mr. Hemstetter's stock of shoes arranged upon their
+shelves. The rent of the store was moderate; and the stock made a
+fine showing of neat white boxes, attractively displayed.
+
+Johnny's friends stood by him loyally. On the first day Keogh
+strolled into the store in a casual kind of way about once every
+hour, and bought shoes. After he had purchased a pair each of
+extension soles, congress gaiters, button kids, low-quartered calfs,
+dancing pumps, rubber boots, tans of various hues, tennis shoes and
+flowered slippers, he sought out Johnny to be prompted as to names
+of other kinds that he might inquire for. The other English-speaking
+residents also played their parts nobly by buying often and
+liberally. Keogh was grand marshal, and made them distribute their
+patronage, thus keeping up a fair run of custom for several days.
+
+Mr. Hemstetter was gratified by the amount of business done thus far;
+but expressed surprise that the natives were so backward with their
+custom.
+
+"Oh, they're awfully shy," explained Johnny, as he wiped his forehead
+nervously. "They'll get the habit pretty soon. They'll come with a
+rush when they do come."
+
+One afternoon Keogh dropped into the consul's office, chewing an
+unlighted cigar thoughtfully.
+
+"Got anything up your sleeve?" he inquired of Johnny. "If you have
+it's about time to show it. If you can borrow some gent's hat in the
+audience, and make a lot of customers for an idle stock of shoes
+come out of it, you'd better spiel. The boys have all laid in enough
+footwear to last 'em ten years; and there's nothing doing in the shoe
+store but dolcy far nienty. I just came by there. Your venerable
+victim was standing in the door, gazing through his specs at the
+bare toes passing by his emporium. The natives here have got the
+true artistic temperament. Me and Clancy took eighteen tintypes this
+morning in two hours. There's been but one pair of shoes sold all
+day. Blanchard went in and bought a pair of fur-lined house-slippers
+because he thought he saw Miss Hemstetter go into the store. I saw
+him throw the slippers into the lagoon afterwards."
+
+"There's a Mobile fruit steamer coming in to-morrow or next day,"
+said Johnny. "We can't do anything until then."
+
+"What are you going to do--try to create a demand?"
+
+"Political economy isn't your strong point," said the consul,
+impudently. "You can't create a demand. But you can create a
+necessity for a demand. That's what I am going to do."
+
+Two weeks after the consul sent his cable, a fruit steamer brought
+him a huge, mysterious brown bale of some unknown commodity. Johnny's
+influence with the custom-house people was sufficiently strong for
+him to get the goods turned over to him without the usual inspection.
+He had the bale taken to the consulate and snugly stowed in the back
+room.
+
+That night he ripped open a corner of it and took out a handful of
+the cockleburrs. He examined them with the care with which a warrior
+examines his arms before he goes forth to battle for his lady-love
+and life. The burrs were the ripe August product, as hard as
+filberts, and bristling with spines as tough and sharp as needles.
+Johnny whistled softly a little tune, and went out to find Billy
+Keogh.
+
+Later in the night, when Coralio was steeped in slumber, he and Billy
+went forth into the deserted streets with their coats bulging like
+balloons. All up and down the Calle Grande they went, sowing the
+sharp burrs carefully in the sand, along the narrow sidewalks, in
+every foot of grass between the silent houses. And then they took the
+side streets and by-ways, missing none. No place where the foot of
+man, woman or child might fall was slighted. Many trips they made to
+and from the prickly hoard. And then, nearly at the dawn, they laid
+themselves down to rest calmly, as great generals do after planning
+a victory according to the revised tactics, and slept, knowing that
+they had sowed with the accuracy of Satan sowing tares and the
+perseverance of Paul planting.
+
+With the rising sun came the purveyors of fruits and meats, and
+arranged their wares in and around the little market-house. At one
+end of the town near the seashore the market-house stood; and the
+sowing of the burrs had not been carried that far. The dealers waited
+long past the hour when their sales usually began. None came to buy.
+"_Qu hay?_" they began to exclaim, one to another.
+
+At their accustomed time, from every 'dobe and palm hut and
+grass-thatched shack and dim _patio_ glided women--black women, brown
+women, lemon-colored women, women dun and yellow and tawny. They
+were the marketers starting to purchase the family supply of cassava,
+plantains, meat, fowls, and tortillas. Dcollet they were and
+bare-armed and bare-footed, with a single skirt reaching below the
+knee. Stolid and ox-eyed, they stepped from their doorways into the
+narrow paths or upon the soft grass of the streets.
+
+The first to emerge uttered ambiguous squeals, and raised one foot
+quickly. Another step and they sat down, with shrill cries of alarm,
+to pick at the new and painful insects that had stung them upon the
+feet. "_Qu picadores diablos!_" they screeched to one another across
+the narrow ways. Some tried the grass instead of the paths, but there
+they were also stung and bitten by the strange little prickly balls.
+They plumped down in the grass, and added their lamentations to those
+of their sisters in the sandy paths. All through the town was heard
+the plaint of the feminine jabber. The venders in the market still
+wondered why no customers came.
+
+Then men, lords of the earth, came forth. They, too, began to hop,
+to dance, to limp, and to curse. They stood stranded and foolish, or
+stooped to pluck at the scourge that attacked their feet and ankles.
+Some loudly proclaimed the pest to be poisonous spiders of an unknown
+species.
+
+And then the children ran out for their morning romp. And now to
+the uproar was added the howls of limping infants and cockleburred
+childhood. Every minute the advancing day brought forth fresh
+victims.
+
+Doa Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas stepped from her
+honoured doorway, as was her daily custom, to procure fresh bread
+from the _panaderia_ across the street. She was clad in a skirt of
+flowered yellow satin, a chemise of ruffled linen, and wore a purple
+mantilla from the looms of Spain. Her lemon-tinted feet, alas! were
+bare. Her progress was majestic, for were not her ancestors hidalgos
+of Aragon? Three steps she made across the velvety grass, and
+set her aristocratic sole upon a bunch of Johnny's burrs. Doa
+Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas emitted a yowl even
+as a wild-cat. Turning about, she fell upon hands and knees, and
+crawled--ay, like a beast of the field she crawled back to her
+honourable door-sill.
+
+Don Seor Ildefonso Federico Valdazar, _Juez de la Paz_, weighing
+twenty stone, attempted to convey his bulk to the _pulperia_ at
+the corner of the plaza in order to assuage his matutinal thirst.
+The first plunge of his unshod foot into the cool grass struck a
+concealed mine. Don Ildefonso fell like a crumpled cathedral, crying
+out that he had been fatally bitten by a deadly scorpion. Everywhere
+were the shoeless citizens hopping, stumbling, limping, and picking
+from their feet the venomous insects that had come in a single night
+to harass them.
+
+The first to perceive the remedy was Estebn Delgado, the barber, a
+man of travel and education. Sitting upon a stone, he plucked burrs
+from his toes, and made oration:
+
+"Behold, my friends, these bugs of the devil! I know them well. They
+soar through the skies in swarms like pigeons. These are the dead
+ones that fell during the night. In Yucatan I have seen them as large
+as oranges. Yes! There they hiss like serpents, and have wings like
+bats. It is the shoes--the shoes that one needs! _Zapatos--zapatos
+para mi!_"
+
+Estebn hobbled to Mr. Hemstetter's store, and bought shoes. Coming
+out, he swaggered down the street with impunity, reviling loudly the
+bugs of the devil. The suffering ones sat up or stood upon one foot
+and beheld the immune barber. Men, women and children took up the
+cry: "_Zapatos! zapatos!_"
+
+The necessity for the demand had been created. The demand followed.
+That day Mr. Hemstetter sold three hundred pairs of shoes.
+
+"It is really surprising," he said to Johnny, who came up in the
+evening to help him straighten out the stock, "how trade is picking
+up. Yesterday I made but three sales."
+
+"I told you they'd whoop things up when they got started," said the
+consul.
+
+"I think I shall order a dozen more cases of goods, to keep the stock
+up," said Mr. Hemstetter, beaming through his spectacles.
+
+"I wouldn't send in any orders yet," advised Johnny. "Wait till you
+see how the trade holds up."
+
+Each night Johnny and Keogh sowed the crop that grew dollars by day.
+At the end of ten days two-thirds of the stock of shoes had been
+sold; and the stock of cockleburrs was exhausted. Johnny cabled to
+Pink Dawson for another 500 pounds, paying twenty cents per pound as
+before. Mr. Hemstetter carefully made up an order for $1500 worth of
+shoes from Northern firms. Johnny hung about the store until this
+order was ready for the mail, and succeeded in destroying it before
+it reached the postoffice.
+
+That night he took Rosine under the mango tree by Goodwin's porch,
+and confessed everything. She looked him in the eye, and said: "You
+are a very wicked man. Father and I will go back home. You say it was
+a joke? I think it is a very serious matter."
+
+But at the end of half an hour's argument the conversation had
+been turned upon a different subject. The two were considering the
+respective merits of pale blue and pink wall paper with which the
+old colonial mansion of the Atwoods in Dalesburg was to be decorated
+after the wedding.
+
+On the next morning Johnny confessed to Mr. Hemstetter. The shoe
+merchant put on his spectacles, and said through them: "You strike me
+as being a most extraordinary young scamp. If I had not managed this
+enterprise with good business judgment my entire stock of goods might
+have been a complete loss. Now, how do you propose to dispose of the
+rest of it?"
+
+When the second invoice of cockleburrs arrived Johnny loaded them and
+the remainder of the shoes into a schooner, and sailed down the coast
+to Alazan.
+
+There, in the same dark and diabolical manner, he repeated his
+success; and came back with a bag of money and not so much as a
+shoestring.
+
+And then he besought his great Uncle of the waving goatee and starred
+vest to accept his resignation, for the lotus no longer lured him. He
+hankered for the spinach and cress of Dalesburg.
+
+The services of Mr. William Terence Keogh as acting consul, _pro
+tem._, were suggested and accepted, and Johnny sailed with the
+Hemstetters back to his native shores.
+
+Keogh slipped into the sinecure of the American consulship with
+the ease that never left him even in such high places. The tintype
+establishment was soon to become a thing of the past, although its
+deadly work along the peaceful and helpless Spanish Main was never
+effaced. The restless partners were about to be off again, scouting
+ahead of the slow ranks of Fortune. But now they would take different
+ways. There were rumours of a promising uprising in Peru; and thither
+the martial Clancy would turn his adventurous steps. As for Keogh, he
+was figuring in his mind and on quires of Government letter-heads a
+scheme that dwarfed the art of misrepresenting the human countenance
+upon tin.
+
+"What suits me," Keogh used to say, "in the way of a business
+proposition is something diversified that looks like a longer shot
+than it is--something in the way of a genteel graft that isn't worked
+enough for the correspondence schools to be teaching it by mail. I
+take the long end; but I like to have at least as good a chance to
+win as a man learning to play poker on an ocean steamer, or running
+for governor of Texas on the Republican ticket. And when I cash in my
+winnings, I don't want to find any widows' and orphans' chips in my
+stack."
+
+The grass-grown globe was the green table on which Keogh gambled. The
+games he played were of his own invention. He was no grubber after
+the diffident dollar. Nor did he care to follow it with horn and
+hounds. Rather he loved to coax it with egregious and brilliant flies
+from its habitat in the waters of strange streams. Yet Keogh was a
+business man; and his schemes, in spite of their singularity, were as
+solidly set as the plans of a building contractor. In Arthur's time
+Sir William Keogh would have been a Knight of the Round Table. In
+these modern days he rides abroad, seeking the Graft instead of the
+Grail.
+
+Three days after Johnny's departure, two small schooners appeared
+off Coralio. After some delay a boat put off from one of them, and
+brought a sunburned young man ashore. This young man had a shrewd and
+calculating eye; and he gazed with amazement at the strange things
+that he saw. He found on the beach some one who directed him to the
+consul's office; and thither he made his way at a nervous gait.
+
+Keogh was sprawled in the official chair, drawing caricatures of
+his Uncle's head on an official pad of paper. He looked up at his
+visitor.
+
+"Where's Johnny Atwood?" inquired the sunburned young man, in a
+business tone.
+
+"Gone," said Keogh, working carefully at Uncle Sam's necktie.
+
+"That's just like him," remarked the nut-brown one, leaning against
+the table. "He always was a fellow to gallivant around instead of
+'tending to business. Will he be in soon?"
+
+"Don't think so," said Keogh, after a fair amount of deliberation.
+
+"I s'pose he's out at some of his tomfoolery," conjectured the
+visitor, in a tone of virtuous conviction. "Johnny never would stick
+to anything long enough to succeed. I wonder how he manages to run
+his business here, and never be 'round to look after it."
+
+"I'm looking after the business just now," admitted the _pro tem._
+consul.
+
+"Are you--then, say!--where's the factory?"
+
+"What factory?" asked Keogh, with a mildly polite interest.
+
+"Why, the factory where they use them cockleburrs. Lord knows what
+they use 'em for, anyway! I've got the basements of both them ships
+out there loaded with 'em. I'll give you a bargain in this lot. I've
+had every man, woman and child around Dalesburg that wasn't busy
+pickin' 'em for a month. I hired these ships to bring 'em over.
+Everybody thought I was crazy. Now, you can have this lot for fifteen
+cents a pound, delivered on land. And if you want more I guess old
+Alabam' can come up to the demand. Johnny told me when he left home
+that if he struck anything down here that there was any money in he'd
+let me in on it. Shall I drive the ships in and hitch?"
+
+A look of supreme, almost incredulous, delight dawned in Keogh's
+ruddy countenance. He dropped his pencil. His eyes turned upon the
+sunburned young man with joy in them mingled with fear lest his
+ecstasy should prove a dream.
+
+"For God's sake, tell me," said Keogh, earnestly, "are you Dink
+Pawson?"
+
+"My name is Pinkney Dawson," said the cornerer of the cockleburr
+market.
+
+Billy Keogh slid rapturously and gently from his chair to his
+favourite strip of matting on the floor.
+
+There were not many sounds in Coralio on that sultry afternoon.
+Among those that were may be mentioned a noise of enraptured and
+unrighteous laughter from a prostrate Irish-American, while a
+sunburned young man, with a shrewd eye, looked on him with wonder and
+amazement. Also the "tramp, tramp, tramp" of many well-shod feet in
+the streets outside. Also the lonesome wash of the waves that beat
+along the historic shores of the Spanish Main.
+
+
+
+
+XIV
+
+MASTERS OF ARTS
+
+
+A two-inch stub of a blue pencil was the wand with which Keogh
+performed the preliminary acts of his magic. So, with this he covered
+paper with diagrams and figures while he waited for the United States
+of America to send down to Coralio a successor to Atwood, resigned.
+
+The new scheme that his mind had conceived, his stout heart indorsed,
+and his blue pencil corroborated, was laid around the characteristics
+and human frailties of the new president of Anchuria. These
+characteristics, and the situation out of which Keogh hoped to wrest
+a golden tribute, deserve chronicling contributive to the clear order
+of events.
+
+President Losada--many called him Dictator--was a man whose genius
+would have made him conspicuous even among Anglo-Saxons, had not
+that genius been intermixed with other traits that were petty and
+subversive. He had some of the lofty patriotism of Washington (the
+man he most admired), the force of Napoleon, and much of the wisdom
+of the sages. These characteristics might have justified him in the
+assumption of the title of "The Illustrious Liberator," had they not
+been accompanied by a stupendous and amazing vanity that kept him in
+the less worthy ranks of the dictators.
+
+Yet he did his country great service. With a mighty grasp he shook it
+nearly free from the shackles of ignorance and sloth and the vermin
+that fed upon it, and all but made it a power in the council of
+nations. He established schools and hospitals, built roads, bridges,
+railroads and palaces, and bestowed generous subsidies upon the arts
+and sciences. He was the absolute despot and the idol of his people.
+The wealth of the country poured into his hands. Other presidents had
+been rapacious without reason. Losada amassed enormous wealth, but
+his people had their share of the benefits.
+
+The joint in his armour was his insatiate passion for monuments and
+tokens commemorating his glory. In every town he caused to be erected
+statues of himself bearing legends in praise of his greatness. In
+the walls of every public edifice, tablets were fixed reciting his
+splendour and the gratitude of his subjects. His statuettes and
+portraits were scattered throughout the land in every house and hut.
+One of the sycophants in his court painted him as St. John, with a
+halo and a train of attendants in full uniform. Losada saw nothing
+incongruous in this picture, and had it hung in a church in the
+capital. He ordered from a French sculptor a marble group including
+himself with Napoleon, Alexander the Great, and one or two others
+whom he deemed worthy of the honour.
+
+He ransacked Europe for decorations, employing policy, money and
+intrigue to cajole the orders he coveted from kings and rulers. On
+state occasions his breast was covered from shoulder to shoulder with
+crosses, stars, golden roses, medals and ribbons. It was said that
+the man who could contrive for him a new decoration, or invent some
+new method of extolling his greatness, might plunge a hand deep into
+the treasury.
+
+This was the man upon whom Billy Keogh had his eye. The gentle
+buccaneer had observed the rain of favors that fell upon those who
+ministered to the president's vanities, and he did not deem it his
+duty to hoist his umbrella against the scattering drops of liquid
+fortune.
+
+In a few weeks the new consul arrived, releasing Keogh from his
+temporary duties. He was a young man fresh from college, who lived
+for botany alone. The consulate at Coralio gave him the opportunity
+to study tropical flora. He wore smoked glasses, and carried a green
+umbrella. He filled the cool, back porch of the consulate with plants
+and specimens so that space for a bottle and chair was not to be
+found. Keogh gazed on him sadly, but without rancour, and began to
+pack his gripsack. For his new plot against stagnation along the
+Spanish Main required of him a voyage overseas.
+
+Soon came the _Karlsefin_ again--she of the trampish habits--gleaning
+a cargo of cocoanuts for a speculative descent upon the New York
+market. Keogh was booked for a passage on the return trip.
+
+"Yes, I'm going to New York," he explained to the group of his
+countrymen that had gathered on the beach to see him off. "But I'll
+be back before you miss me. I've undertaken the art education of this
+piebald country, and I'm not the man to desert it while it's in the
+early throes of tintypes."
+
+With this mysterious declaration of his intentions Keogh boarded the
+_Karlsefin_.
+
+Ten days later, shivering, with the collar of his thin coat turned
+high, he burst into the studio of Carolus White at the top of a tall
+building in Tenth Street, New York City.
+
+Carolus White was smoking a cigarette and frying sausages over an oil
+stove. He was only twenty-three, and had noble theories about art.
+
+"Billy Keogh!" exclaimed White, extending the hand that was not busy
+with the frying pan. "From what part of the uncivilized world, I
+wonder!"
+
+"Hello, Carry," said Keogh, dragging forward a stool, and holding his
+fingers close to the stove. "I'm glad I found you so soon. I've been
+looking for you all day in the directories and art galleries. The
+free-lunch man on the corner told me where you were, quick. I was
+sure you'd be painting pictures yet."
+
+Keogh glanced about the studio with the shrewd eye of a connoisseur
+in business.
+
+"Yes, you can do it," he declared, with many gentle nods of his head.
+"That big one in the corner with the angels and green clouds and
+band-wagon is just the sort of thing we want. What would you call
+that, Carry--scene from Coney Island, ain't it?"
+
+"That," said White, "I had intended to call 'The Translation of
+Elijah,' but you may be nearer right than I am."
+
+"Name doesn't matter," said Keogh, largely; "it's the frame and the
+varieties of paint that does the trick. Now, I can tell you in a
+minute what I want. I've come on a little voyage of two thousand
+miles to take you in with me on a scheme. I thought of you as soon as
+the scheme showed itself to me. How would you like to go back with
+me and paint a picture? Ninety days for the trip, and five thousand
+dollars for the job."
+
+"Cereal food or hair-tonic posters?" asked White.
+
+"It isn't an ad."
+
+"What kind of a picture is it to be?"
+
+"It's a long story," said Keogh.
+
+"Go ahead with it. If you don't mind, while you talk I'll just keep
+my eye on these sausages. Let 'em get one shade deeper than a Vandyke
+brown and you spoil 'em."
+
+Keogh explained his project. They were to return to Coralio, where
+White was to pose as a distinguished American portrait painter who
+was touring in the tropics as a relaxation from his arduous and
+remunerative professional labours. It was not an unreasonable hope,
+even to those who had trod in the beaten paths of business, that an
+artist with so much prestige might secure a commission to perpetuate
+upon canvas the lineaments of the president, and secure a share of
+the _pesos_ that were raining upon the caterers to his weaknesses.
+
+Keogh had set his price at ten thousand dollars. Artists had been
+paid more for portraits. He and White were to share the expenses of
+the trip, and divide the possible profits. Thus he laid the scheme
+before White, whom he had known in the West before one declared for
+Art and the other became a Bedouin.
+
+Before long the two machinators abandoned the rigour of the bare
+studio for a snug corner of a caf. There they sat far into the
+night, with old envelopes and Keogh's stub of blue pencil between
+them.
+
+At twelve o'clock White doubled up in his chair, with his chin on his
+fist, and shut his eyes at the unbeautiful wall-paper.
+
+"I'll go you, Billy," he said, in the quiet tones of decision. "I've
+got two or three hundred saved up for sausages and rent; and I'll
+take the chance with you. Five thousand! It will give me two years in
+Paris and one in Italy. I'll begin to pack to-morrow."
+
+"You'll begin in ten minutes," said Keogh. "It's to-morrow now. The
+_Karlsefin_ starts back at four P.M. Come on to your painting shop,
+and I'll help you."
+
+For five months in the year Coralio is the Newport of Anchuria.
+Then only does the town possess life. From November to March it is
+practically the seat of government. The president with his official
+family sojourns there; and society follows him. The pleasure-loving
+people make the season one long holiday of amusement and rejoicing.
+_Fiestas_, balls, games, sea bathing, processions and small theatres
+contribute to their enjoyment. The famous Swiss band from the
+capital plays in the little plaza every evening, while the fourteen
+carriages and vehicles in the town circle in funereal but complacent
+procession. Indians from the interior mountains, looking like
+prehistoric stone idols, come down to peddle their handiwork in the
+streets. The people throng the narrow ways, a chattering, happy,
+careless stream of buoyant humanity. Preposterous children rigged out
+with the shortest of ballet skirts and gilt wings, howl, underfoot,
+among the effervescent crowds. Especially is the arrival of the
+presidential party, at the opening of the season, attended with pomp,
+show and patriotic demonstrations of enthusiasm and delight.
+
+When Keogh and White reached their destination, on the return trip
+of the _Karlsefin_, the gay winter season was well begun. As they
+stepped upon the beach they could hear the band playing in the plaza.
+The village maidens, with fireflies already fixed in their dark
+locks, were gliding, barefoot and coy-eyed, along the paths. Dandies
+in white linen, swinging their canes, were beginning their seductive
+strolls. The air was full of human essence, of artificial enticement,
+of coquetry, indolence, pleasure--the man-made sense of existence.
+
+The first two or three days after their arrival were spent in
+preliminaries. Keogh escorted the artist about town, introducing
+him to the little circle of English-speaking residents and pulling
+whatever wires he could to effect the spreading of White's fame as a
+painter. And then Keogh planned a more spectacular demonstration of
+the idea he wished to keep before the public.
+
+He and White engaged rooms in the Hotel de los Estranjeros. The
+two were clad in new suits of immaculate duck, with American straw
+hats, and carried canes of remarkable uniqueness and inutility. Few
+caballeros in Coralio--even the gorgeously uniformed officers of
+the Anchurian army--were as conspicuous for ease and elegance of
+demeanour as Keogh and his friend, the great American painter, Seor
+White.
+
+White set up his easel on the beach and made striking sketches of the
+mountain and sea views. The native population formed at his rear in a
+vast, chattering semicircle to watch his work. Keogh, with his care
+for details, had arranged for himself a pose which he carried out
+with fidelity. His rle was that of friend to the great artist, a
+man of affairs and leisure. The visible emblem of his position was a
+pocket camera.
+
+"For branding the man who owns it," said he, "a genteel dilettante
+with a bank account and an easy conscience, a steam-yacht ain't in it
+with a camera. You see a man doing nothing but loafing around making
+snap-shots, and you know right away he reads up well in 'Bradstreet.'
+You notice these old millionaire boys--soon as they get through
+taking everything else in sight they go to taking photographs.
+People are more impressed by a kodak than they are by a title or
+a four-carat scarf-pin." So Keogh strolled blandly about Coralio,
+snapping the scenery and the shrinking seoritas, while White posed
+conspicuously in the higher regions of art.
+
+Two weeks after their arrival, the scheme began to bear fruit.
+An aide-de-camp of the president drove to the hotel in a dashing
+victoria. The president desired that Seor White come to the Casa
+Morena for an informal interview.
+
+Keogh gripped his pipe tightly between his teeth. "Not a cent less
+than ten thousand," he said to the artist--"remember the price.
+And in gold or its equivalent--don't let him stick you with this
+bargain-counter stuff they call money here."
+
+"Perhaps it isn't that he wants," said White.
+
+"Get out!" said Keogh, with splendid confidence. "I know what he
+wants. He wants his picture painted by the celebrated young American
+painter and filibuster now sojourning in his down-trodden country.
+Off you go."
+
+The victoria sped away with the artist. Keogh walked up and down,
+puffing great clouds of smoke from his pipe, and waited. In an hour
+the victoria swept again to the door of the hotel, deposited White,
+and vanished. The artist dashed up the stairs, three at a step. Keogh
+stopped smoking, and became a silent interrogation point.
+
+"Landed," exclaimed White, with his boyish face flushed with elation.
+"Billy, you are a wonder. He wants a picture. I'll tell you all about
+it. By Heavens! that dictator chap is a corker! He's a dictator clear
+down to his finger-ends. He's a kind of combination of Julius Csar,
+Lucifer and Chauncey Depew done in sepia. Polite and grim--that's his
+way. The room I saw him in was about ten acres big, and looked like
+a Mississippi steamboat with its gilding and mirrors and white paint.
+He talks English better than I can ever hope to. The matter of the
+price came up. I mentioned ten thousand. I expected him to call the
+guard and have me taken out and shot. He didn't move an eyelash. He
+just waved one of his chestnut hands in a careless way, and said,
+'Whatever you say.' I am to go back to-morrow and discuss with him
+the details of the picture."
+
+Keogh hung his head. Self-abasement was easy to read in his downcast
+countenance.
+
+"I'm failing, Carry," he said, sorrowfully. "I'm not fit to handle
+these man's-size schemes any longer. Peddling oranges in a push-cart
+is about the suitable graft for me. When I said ten thousand, I
+swear I thought I had sized up that brown man's limit to within
+two cents. He'd have melted down for fifteen thousand just as easy.
+Say--Carry--you'll see old man Keogh safe in some nice, quiet idiot
+asylum, won't you, if he makes a break like that again?"
+
+The Casa Morena, although only one story in height, was a building of
+brown stone, luxurious as a palace in its interior. It stood on a low
+hill in a walled garden of splendid tropical flora at the upper edge
+of Coralio. The next day the president's carriage came again for the
+artist. Keogh went out for a walk along the beach, where he and his
+"picture box" were now familiar sights. When he returned to the hotel
+White was sitting in a steamer-chair on the balcony.
+
+"Well," said Keogh, "did you and His Nibs decide on the kind of a
+chromo he wants?"
+
+White got up and walked back and forth on the balcony a few times.
+Then he stopped, and laughed strangely. His face was flushed, and his
+eyes were bright with a kind of angry amusement.
+
+"Look here, Billy," he said, somewhat roughly, "when you first came
+to me in my studio and mentioned a picture, I thought you wanted a
+Smashed Oats or a Hair Tonic poster painted on a range of mountains
+or the side of a continent. Well, either of those jobs would have
+been Art in its highest form compared to the one you've steered me
+against. I can't paint that picture, Billy. You've got to let me
+out. Let me try to tell you what that barbarian wants. He had it
+all planned out and even a sketch made of his idea. The old boy
+doesn't draw badly at all. But, ye goddesses of Art! listen to the
+monstrosity he expects me to paint. He wants himself in the centre
+of the canvas, of course. He is to be painted as Jupiter sitting
+on Olympus, with the clouds at his feet. At one side of him stands
+George Washington, in full regimentals, with his hand on the
+president's shoulder. An angel with outstretched wings hovers
+overhead, and is placing a laurel wreath on the president's head,
+crowning him--Queen of the May, I suppose. In the background is to
+be cannon, more angels and soldiers. The man who would paint that
+picture would have to have the soul of a dog, and would deserve to go
+down into oblivion without even a tin can tied to his tail to sound
+his memory."
+
+Little beads of moisture crept out all over Billy Keogh's brow. The
+stub of his blue pencil had not figured out a contingency like this.
+The machinery of his plan had run with flattering smoothness until
+now. He dragged another chair upon the balcony, and got White back to
+his seat. He lit his pipe with apparent calm.
+
+"Now, sonny," he said, with gentle grimness, "you and me will have
+an Art to Art talk. You've got your art and I've got mine. Yours is
+the real Pierian stuff that turns up its nose at bock-beer signs and
+oleographs of the Old Mill. Mine's the art of Business. This was my
+scheme, and it worked out like two-and-two. Paint that president man
+as Old King Cole, or Venus, or a landscape, or a fresco, or a bunch
+of lilies, or anything he thinks he looks like. But get the paint on
+the canvas and collect the spoils. You wouldn't throw me down, Carry,
+at this stage of the game. Think of that ten thousand."
+
+"I can't help thinking of it," said White, "and that's what hurts.
+I'm tempted to throw every ideal I ever had down in the mire, and
+steep my soul in infamy by painting that picture. That five thousand
+meant three years of foreign study to me, and I'd almost sell my soul
+for that."
+
+"Now it ain't as bad as that," said Keogh, soothingly. "It's a
+business proposition. It's so much paint and time against money. I
+don't fall in with your idea that that picture would so everlastingly
+jolt the art side of the question. George Washington was all right,
+you know, and nobody could say a word against the angel. I don't
+think so bad of that group. If you was to give Jupiter a pair of
+epaulets and a sword, and kind of work the clouds around to look
+like a blackberry patch, it wouldn't make such a bad battle scene.
+Why, if we hadn't already settled on the price, he ought to pay an
+extra thousand for Washington, and the angel ought to raise it five
+hundred."
+
+"You don't understand, Billy," said White, with an uneasy laugh.
+"Some of us fellows who try to paint have big notions about Art. I
+wanted to paint a picture some day that people would stand before and
+forget that it was made of paint. I wanted it to creep into them like
+a bar of music and mushroom there like a soft bullet. And I wanted
+'em to go away and ask, 'What else has he done?' And I didn't want
+'em to find a thing; not a portrait nor a magazine cover nor an
+illustration nor a drawing of a girl--nothing but _the_ picture.
+That's why I've lived on fried sausages, and tried to keep true
+to myself. I persuaded myself to do this portrait for the chance
+it might give me to study abroad. But this howling, screaming
+caricature! Good Lord! can't you see how it is?"
+
+"Sure," said Keogh, as tenderly as he would have spoken to a child,
+and he laid a long forefinger on White's knee. "I see. It's bad to
+have your art all slugged up like that. I know. You wanted to paint a
+big thing like the panorama of the battle of Gettysburg. But let me
+kalsomine you a little mental sketch to consider. Up to date we're
+out $385.50 on this scheme. Our capital took every cent both of us
+could raise. We've got about enough left to get back to New York on.
+I need my share of that ten thousand. I want to work a copper deal
+in Idaho, and make a hundred thousand. That's the business end of
+the thing. Come down off your art perch, Carry, and let's land that
+hatful of dollars."
+
+"Billy," said White, with an effort, "I'll try. I won't say I'll do
+it, but I'll try. I'll go at it, and put it through if I can."
+
+"That's business," said Keogh heartily. "Good boy! Now, here's
+another thing--rush that picture--crowd it through as quick as you
+can. Get a couple of boys to help you mix the paint if necessary.
+I've picked up some pointers around town. The people here are
+beginning to get sick of Mr. President. They say he's been too free
+with concessions; and they accuse him of trying to make a dicker with
+England to sell out the country. We want that picture done and paid
+for before there's any row."
+
+In the great _patio_ of Casa Morena, the president caused to be
+stretched a huge canvas. Under this White set up his temporary
+studio. For two hours each day the great man sat to him.
+
+White worked faithfully. But, as the work progressed, he had seasons
+of bitter scorn, of infinite self-contempt, of sullen gloom and
+sardonic gaiety. Keogh, with the patience of a great general,
+soothed, coaxed, argued--kept him at the picture.
+
+At the end of a month White announced that the picture was
+completed--Jupiter, Washington, angels, clouds, cannon and all. His
+face was pale and his mouth drawn straight when he told Keogh. He
+said the president was much pleased with it. It was to be hung in
+the National Gallery of Statesmen and Heroes. The artist had been
+requested to return to Casa Morena on the following day to receive
+payment. At the appointed time he left the hotel, silent under his
+friend's joyful talk of their success.
+
+An hour later he walked into the room where Keogh was waiting, threw
+his hat on the floor, and sat upon the table.
+
+"Billy," he said, in strained and labouring tones, "I've a little
+money out West in a small business that my brother is running. It's
+what I've been living on while I've been studying art. I'll draw out
+my share and pay you back what you've lost on this scheme."
+
+"Lost!" exclaimed Keogh, jumping up. "Didn't you get paid for the
+picture?"
+
+"Yes, I got paid," said White. "But just now there isn't any picture,
+and there isn't any pay. If you care to hear about it, here are the
+edifying details. The president and I were looking at the painting.
+His secretary brought a bank draft on New York for ten thousand
+dollars and handed it to me. The moment I touched it I went wild. I
+tore it into little pieces and threw them on the floor. A workman
+was repainting the pillars inside the _patio_. A bucket of his paint
+happened to be convenient. I picked up his brush and slapped a quart
+of blue paint all over that ten-thousand-dollar nightmare. I bowed,
+and walked out. The president didn't move or speak. That was one time
+he was taken by surprise. It's tough on you, Billy, but I couldn't
+help it."
+
+There seemed to be excitement in Coralio. Outside there was a
+confused, rising murmur pierced by high-pitched cries. "_Bajo el
+traidor--Muerte el traidor!_" were the words they seemed to form.
+
+"Listen to that!" exclaimed White, bitterly: "I know that much
+Spanish. They're shouting, 'Down with the traitor!' I heard them
+before. I felt that they meant me. I was a traitor to Art. The
+picture had to go."
+
+"'Down with the blank fool' would have suited your case better," said
+Keogh, with fiery emphasis. "You tear up ten thousand dollars like an
+old rag because the way you've spread on five dollars' worth of paint
+hurts your conscience. Next time I pick a side-partner in a scheme
+the man has got to go before a notary and swear he never even heard
+the word 'ideal' mentioned."
+
+Keogh strode from the room, white-hot. White paid little attention
+to his resentment. The scorn of Billy Keogh seemed a trifling thing
+beside the greater self-scorn he had escaped.
+
+In Coralio the excitement waxed. An outburst was imminent. The cause
+of this demonstration of displeasure was the presence in the town of
+a big, pink-cheeked Englishman, who, it was said, was an agent of his
+government come to clinch the bargain by which the president placed
+his people in the hands of a foreign power. It was charged that not
+only had he given away priceless concessions, but that the public
+debt was to be transferred into the hands of the English, and the
+custom-houses turned over to them as a guarantee. The long-enduring
+people had determined to make their protest felt.
+
+On that night, in Coralio and in other towns, their ire found vent.
+Yelling mobs, mercurial but dangerous, roamed the streets. They
+overthrew the great bronze statue of the president that stood in the
+centre of the plaza, and hacked it to shapeless pieces. They tore
+from public buildings the tablets set there proclaiming the glory
+of the "Illustrious Liberator." His pictures in the government
+offices were demolished. The mobs even attacked the Casa Morena, but
+were driven away by the military, which remained faithful to the
+executive. All the night terror reigned.
+
+The greatness of Losada was shown by the fact that by noon the
+next day order was restored, and he was still absolute. He issued
+proclamations denying positively that any negotiations of any
+kind had been entered into with England. Sir Stafford Vaughn, the
+pink-cheeked Englishman, also declared in placards and in public
+print that his presence there had no international significance. He
+was a traveller without guile. In fact (so he stated), he had not
+even spoken with the president or been in his presence since his
+arrival.
+
+During this disturbance, White was preparing for his homeward voyage
+in the steamship that was to sail within two or three days. About
+noon, Keogh, the restless, took his camera out with the hope of
+speeding the lagging hours. The town was now as quiet as if peace had
+never departed from her perch on the red-tiled roofs.
+
+About the middle of the afternoon, Keogh hurried back to the hotel
+with something decidedly special in his air. He retired to the little
+room where he developed his pictures.
+
+Later on he came out to White on the balcony, with a luminous, grim,
+predatory smile on his face.
+
+"Do you know what that is?" he asked, holding up a 4 5 photograph
+mounted on cardboard.
+
+"Snap-shot of a seorita sitting in the sand--alliteration
+unintentional," guessed White, lazily.
+
+"Wrong," said Keogh with shining eyes. "It's a slung-shot. It's a can
+of dynamite. It's a gold mine. It's a sight-draft on your president
+man for twenty thousand dollars--yes, sir--twenty thousand this time,
+and no spoiling the picture. No ethics of art in the way. Art! You
+with your smelly little tubes! I've got you skinned to death with a
+kodak. Take a look at that."
+
+White took the picture in his hand, and gave a long whistle.
+
+"Jove!" he exclaimed, "but wouldn't that stir up a row in town if you
+let it be seen. How in the world did you get it, Billy?"
+
+"You know that high wall around the president man's back garden?
+I was up there trying to get a bird's-eye of the town. I happened
+to notice a chink in the wall where a stone and a lot of plaster
+had slid out. Thinks I, I'll take a peep through to see how Mr.
+President's cabbages are growing. The first thing I saw was him and
+this Sir Englishman sitting at a little table about twenty feet away.
+They had the table all spread over with documents, and they were
+hobnobbing over them as thick as two pirates. 'Twas a nice corner
+of the garden, all private and shady with palms and orange trees,
+and they had a pail of champagne set by handy in the grass. I knew
+then was the time for me to make my big hit in Art. So I raised the
+machine up to the crack, and pressed the button. Just as I did so
+them old boys shook hands on the deal--you see they took that way in
+the picture."
+
+Keogh put on his coat and hat.
+
+"What are you going to do with it?" asked White.
+
+"Me," said Keogh in a hurt tone, "why, I'm going to tie a pink ribbon
+to it and hang it on the what-not, of course. I'm surprised at
+you. But while I'm out you just try to figure out what ginger-cake
+potentate would be most likely to want to buy this work of art for
+his private collection--just to keep it out of circulation."
+
+The sunset was reddening the tops of the cocoanut palms when
+Billy Keogh came back from Casa Morena. He nodded to the artist's
+questioning gaze; and lay down on a cot with his hands under the back
+of his head.
+
+"I saw him. He paid the money like a little man. They didn't want to
+let me in at first. I told 'em it was important. Yes, that president
+man is on the plenty-able list. He's got a beautiful business system
+about the way he uses his brains. All I had to do was to hold
+up the photograph so he could see it, and name the price. He
+just smiled, and walked over to a safe and got the cash. Twenty
+one-thousand-dollar brand-new United States Treasury notes he laid
+on the table, like I'd pay out a dollar and a quarter. Fine notes,
+too--they crackled with a sound like burning the brush off a ten-acre
+lot."
+
+"Let's try the feel of one," said White, curiously. "I never saw a
+thousand-dollar bill." Keogh did not immediately respond.
+
+"Carry," he said, in an absent-minded way, "you think a heap of your
+art, don't you?"
+
+"More," said White, frankly, "than has been for the financial good of
+myself and my friends."
+
+"I thought you were a fool the other day," went on Keogh, quietly,
+"and I'm not sure now that you wasn't. But if you was, so am I. I've
+been in some funny deals, Carry, but I've always managed to scramble
+fair, and match my brains and capital against the other fellow's. But
+when it comes to--well, when you've got the other fellow cinched,
+and the screws on him, and he's got to put up--why, it don't strike
+me as being a man's game. They've got a name for it, you know;
+it's--confound you, don't you understand? A fellow feels--it's
+something like that blamed art of yours--he--well, I tore that
+photograph up and laid the pieces on that stack of money and shoved
+the whole business back across the table. 'Excuse me, Mr. Losada,'
+I said, 'but I guess I've made a mistake in the price. You get the
+photo for nothing.' Now, Carry, you get out the pencil, and we'll do
+some more figuring. I'd like to save enough out of our capital for
+you to have some fried sausages in your joint when you get back to
+New York."
+
+
+
+
+XV
+
+DICKY
+
+
+There is little consecutiveness along the Spanish Main. Things happen
+there intermittently. Even Time seems to hang his scythe daily on the
+branch of an orange tree while he takes a siesta and a cigarette.
+
+After the ineffectual revolt against the administration of President
+Losada, the country settled again into quiet toleration of the abuses
+with which he had been charged. In Coralio old political enemies
+went arm-in-arm, lightly eschewing for the time all differences of
+opinion.
+
+The failure of the art expedition did not stretch the cat-footed
+Keogh upon his back. The ups and downs of Fortune made smooth
+travelling for his nimble steps. His blue pencil stub was at work
+again before the smoke of the steamer on which White sailed had
+cleared away from the horizon. He had but to speak a word to Geddie
+to find his credit negotiable for whatever goods he wanted from the
+store of Brannigan & Company. On the same day on which White arrived
+in New York Keogh, at the rear of a train of five pack mules loaded
+with hardware and cutlery, set his face toward the grim, interior
+mountains. There the Indian tribes wash gold dust from the auriferous
+streams; and when a market is brought to them trading is brisk and
+_muy bueno_ in the Cordilleras.
+
+In Coralio Time folded his wings and paced wearily along his drowsy
+path. They who had most cheered the torpid hours were gone. Clancy
+had sailed on a Spanish barque for Colon, contemplating a cut across
+the isthmus and then a further voyage to end at Calao, where the
+fighting was said to be on. Geddie, whose quiet and genial nature had
+once served to mitigate the frequent dull reaction of lotus eating,
+was now a home-man, happy with his bright orchid, Paula, and never
+even dreaming of or regretting the unsolved, sealed and monogramed
+Bottle whose contents, now inconsiderable, were held safely in the
+keeping of the sea.
+
+Well may the Walrus, most discerning and eclectic of beasts, place
+sealing-wax midway on his programme of topics that fall pertinent and
+diverting upon the ear.
+
+Atwood was gone--he of the hospitable back porch and ingenuous
+cunning. Dr. Gregg, with his trepanning story smouldering within him,
+was a whiskered volcano, always showing signs of imminent eruption,
+and was not to be considered in the ranks of those who might
+contribute to the amelioration of ennui. The new consul's note chimed
+with the sad sea waves and the violent tropical greens--he had not a
+bar of Scheherezade or of the Round Table in his lute. Goodwin was
+employed with large projects: what time he was loosed from them found
+him at his home, where he loved to be. Therefore it will be seen that
+there was a dearth of fellowship and entertainment among the foreign
+contingent of Coralio.
+
+And then Dicky Maloney dropped down from the clouds upon the town,
+and amused it.
+
+Nobody knew where Dicky Maloney hailed from or how he reached
+Coralio. He appeared there one day; and that was all. He afterward
+said that he came on the fruit steamer _Thor_; but an inspection of
+the _Thor's_ passenger list of that date was found to be Maloneyless.
+Curiosity, however, soon perished; and Dicky took his place among the
+odd fish cast up by the Caribbean.
+
+He was an active, devil-may-care, rollicking fellow with an engaging
+gray eye, the most irresistible grin, a rather dark or much sunburned
+complexion, and a head of the fieriest red hair ever seen in that
+country. Speaking the Spanish language as well as he spoke English,
+and seeming always to have plenty of silver in his pockets, it was
+not long before he was a welcome companion whithersoever he went. He
+had an extreme fondness for _vino blanco_, and gained the reputation
+of being able to drink more of it than any three men in town.
+Everybody called him "Dicky"; everybody cheered up at the sight of
+him--especially the natives, to whom his marvellous red hair and his
+free-and-easy style were a constant delight and envy. Wherever you
+went in the town you would soon see Dicky or hear his genial laugh,
+and find around him a group of admirers who appreciated him both for
+his good nature and the white wine he was always so ready to buy.
+
+A considerable amount of speculation was had concerning the object of
+his sojourn there, until one day he silenced this by opening a small
+shop for the sale of tobacco, _dulces_ and the handiwork of the
+interior Indians--fibre-and-silk-woven goods, deerskin _zapatos_ and
+basketwork of _tule_ reeds. Even then he did not change his habits;
+for he was drinking and playing cards half the day and night with the
+_comandante_, the collector of customs, the _Jefe Politico_ and other
+gay dogs among the native officials.
+
+One day Dicky saw Pasa, the daughter of Madama Ortiz, sitting in the
+side-door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros. He stopped in his tracks,
+still, for the first time in Coralio; and then he sped, swift as a
+deer, to find Vasquez, a gilded native youth, to present him.
+
+The young men had named Pasa "_La Santita Naranjadita_."
+_Naranjadita_ is a Spanish word for a certain colour that you must go
+to more trouble to describe in English. By saying "The little saint,
+tinted the most beautiful-delicate-slightly-orange-golden," you will
+approximate the description of Madama Ortiz's daughter.
+
+La Madama Ortiz sold rum in addition to other liquors. Now, you must
+know that the rum expiates whatever opprobrium attends upon the other
+commodities. For rum-making, mind you, is a government monopoly;
+and to keep a government dispensary assures respectability if not
+preminence. Moreover, the saddest of precisians could find no fault
+with the conduct of the shop. Customers drank there in the lowest of
+spirits and fearsomely, as in the shadow of the dead; for Madama's
+ancient and vaunted lineage counteracted even the rum's behest to be
+merry. For, was she not of the Iglesias, who landed with Pizarro? And
+had not her deceased husband been _comisionado de caminos y puentes_
+for the district?
+
+In the evenings Pasa sat by the window in the room next to the one
+where they drank, and strummed dreamily upon her guitar. And then,
+by twos and threes, would come visiting young caballeros and occupy
+the prim line of chairs set against the wall of this room. They were
+there to besiege the heart of "_La Santita_." Their method (which is
+not proof against intelligent competition) consisted of expanding the
+chest, looking valorous, and consuming a gross or two of cigarettes.
+Even saints delicately oranged prefer to be wooed differently.
+
+Doa Pasa would tide over the vast chasms of nicotinized silence
+with music from her guitar, while she wondered if the romances she
+had read about gallant and more--more contiguous cavaliers were all
+lies. At somewhat regular intervals Madama would glide in from the
+dispensary with a sort of drought-suggesting gleam in her eye, and
+there would be a rustling of stiffly-starched white trousers as one
+of the caballeros would propose an adjournment to the bar.
+
+That Dicky Maloney would, sooner or later, explore this field was a
+thing to be foreseen. There were few doors in Coralio into which his
+red head had not been poked.
+
+In an incredibly short space of time after his first sight of her
+he was there, seated close beside her rocking chair. There were no
+back-against-the-wall poses in Dicky's theory of wooing. His plan of
+subjection was an attack at close range. To carry the fortress with
+one concentrated, ardent, eloquent, irresistible _escalade_--that was
+Dicky's way.
+
+Pasa was descended from the proudest Spanish families in the country.
+Moreover, she had had unusual advantages. Two years in a New Orleans
+school had elevated her ambitions and fitted her for a fate above the
+ordinary maidens of her native land. And yet here she succumbed to
+the first red-haired scamp with a glib tongue and a charming smile
+that came along and courted her properly.
+
+Very soon Dicky took her to the little church on the corner of the
+plaza, and "Mrs. Maloney" was added to her string of distinguished
+names.
+
+And it was her fate to sit, with her patient, saintly eyes and figure
+like a bisque Psyche, behind the sequestered counter of the little
+shop, while Dicky drank and philandered with his frivolous
+acquaintances.
+
+The women, with their naturally fine instinct, saw a chance for
+vivisection, and delicately taunted her with his habits. She turned
+upon them in a beautiful, steady blaze of sorrowful contempt.
+
+"You meat-cows," she said, in her level, crystal-clear tones; "you
+know nothing of a man. Your men are _maromeros_. They are fit only to
+roll cigarettes in the shade until the sun strikes and shrivels them
+up. They drone in your hammocks and you comb their hair and feed
+them with fresh fruit. My man is of no such blood. Let him drink of
+the wine. When he has taken sufficient of it to drown one of your
+_flaccitos_ he will come home to me more of a man than one thousand
+of your _pobrecitos_. _My_ hair he smooths and braids; to me he
+sings; he himself removes my _zapatos_, and there, there, upon each
+instep leaves a kiss. He holds-- Oh, you will never understand! Blind
+ones who have never known a _man_."
+
+Sometimes mysterious things happened at night about Dicky's shop.
+While the front of it was dark, in the little room back of it Dicky
+and a few of his friends would sit about a table carrying on some
+kind of very quiet _negocios_ until quite late. Finally he would let
+them out the front door very carefully, and go upstairs to his little
+saint. These visitors were generally conspirator-like men with dark
+clothes and hats. Of course, these dark doings were noticed after a
+while, and talked about.
+
+Dicky seemed to care nothing at all for the society of the alien
+residents of the town. He avoided Goodwin, and his skilful escape
+from the trepanning story of Dr. Gregg is still referred to, in
+Coralio, as a masterpiece of lightning diplomacy.
+
+Many letters arrived, addressed to "Mr. Dicky Maloney," or "Seor
+Dickee Maloney," to the considerable pride of Pasa. That so many
+people should desire to write to him only confirmed her own suspicion
+that the light from his red head shone around the world. As to their
+contents she never felt curiosity. There was a wife for you!
+
+The one mistake Dicky made in Coralio was to run out of money at the
+wrong time. Where his money came from was a puzzle, for the sales
+of his shop were next to nothing, but that source failed, and at a
+peculiarly unfortunate time. It was when the _comandante_, Don Seor
+el Coronel Encarnacion Rios, looked upon the little saint seated in
+the shop and felt his heart go pitapat.
+
+The _comandante_, who was versed in all the intricate arts of
+gallantry, first delicately hinted at his sentiments by donning his
+dress uniform and strutting up and down fiercely before her window.
+Pasa, glancing demurely with her saintly eyes, instantly perceived
+his resemblance to her parrot, Chichi, and was diverted to the extent
+of a smile. The _comandante_ saw the smile, which was not intended
+for him. Convinced of an impression made, he entered the shop,
+confidently, and advanced to open compliment. Pasa froze; he pranced;
+she flamed royally; he was charmed to injudicious persistence; she
+commanded him to leave the shop; he tried to capture her hand,--and
+Dicky entered, smiling broadly, full of white wine and the devil.
+
+He spent five minutes in punishing the _comandante_ scientifically
+and carefully, so that the pain might be prolonged as far as
+possible. At the end of that time he pitched the rash wooer out the
+door upon the stones of the street, senseless.
+
+A barefooted policeman who had been watching the affair from across
+the street blew a whistle. A squad of four soldiers came running from
+the _cuartel_ around the corner. When they saw that the offender
+was Dicky, they stopped, and blew more whistles, which brought out
+renforcements of eight. Deeming the odds against them sufficiently
+reduced, the military advanced upon the disturber.
+
+Dicky, being thoroughly imbued with the martial spirit, stooped
+and drew the _comandante's_ sword, which was girded about him, and
+charged his foe. He chased the standing army four squares, playfully
+prodding its squealing rear and hacking at its ginger-coloured heels.
+
+But he was not so successful with the civic authorities. Six
+muscular, nimble policemen overpowered him and conveyed him,
+triumphantly but warily, to jail. "_El Diablo Colorado_" they dubbed
+him, and derided the military for its defeat.
+
+Dicky, with the rest of the prisoners, could look out through
+the barred door at the grass of the little plaza, at a row of
+orange trees and the red tile roofs and 'dobe walls of a line of
+insignificant stores.
+
+At sunset along a path across this plaza came a melancholy procession
+of sad-faced women bearing plantains, cassaba, bread and fruit--each
+coming with food to some wretch behind those bars to whom she still
+clung and furnished the means of life. Twice a day--morning and
+evening--they were permitted to come. Water was furnished to her
+compulsory guests by the republic, but no food.
+
+That evening Dicky's name was called by the sentry, and he stepped
+before the bars of the door. There stood his little saint, a black
+mantilla draped about her head and shoulders, her face like glorified
+melancholy, her clear eyes gazing longingly at him as if they might
+draw him between the bars to her. She brought a chicken, some
+oranges, _dulces_ and a loaf of white bread. A soldier inspected the
+food, and passed it in to Dicky. Pasa spoke calmly, as she always
+did, briefly, in her thrilling, flute-like tones. "Angel of my life,"
+she said, "let it not be long that thou art away from me. Thou
+knowest that life is not a thing to be endured with thou not at
+my side. Tell me if I can do aught in this matter. If not, I will
+wait--a little while. I come again in the morning."
+
+Dicky, with his shoes removed so as not to disturb his fellow
+prisoners, tramped the floor of the jail half the night condemning
+his lack of money and the cause of it--whatever that might have been.
+He knew very well that money would have bought his release at once.
+
+For two days succeeding Pasa came at the appointed times and brought
+him food. He eagerly inquired each time if a letter or package had
+come for him, and she mournfully shook her head.
+
+On the morning of the third day she brought only a small loaf of
+bread. There were dark circles under her eyes. She seemed as calm as
+ever.
+
+"By jingo," said Dicky, who seemed to speak in English or Spanish as
+the whim seized him, "this is dry provender, _muchachita_. Is this
+the best you can dig up for a fellow?"
+
+Pasa looked at him as a mother looks at a beloved but capricious
+babe.
+
+"Think better of it," she said, in a low voice; "since for the next
+meal there will be nothing. The last _centavo_ is spent." She pressed
+closer against the grating.
+
+"Sell the goods in the shop--take anything for them."
+
+"Have I not tried? Did I not offer them for one-tenth their cost? Not
+even one _peso_ would any one give. There is not one _real_ in this
+town to assist Dickee Malonee."
+
+Dick clenched his teeth grimly. "That's the _comandante_," he
+growled. "He's responsible for that sentiment. Wait, oh, wait till
+the cards are all out."
+
+Pasa lowered her voice to almost a whisper. "And, listen, heart of my
+heart," she said, "I have endeavoured to be brave, but I cannot live
+without thee. Three days now--"
+
+Dicky caught a faint gleam of steel from the folds of her mantilla.
+For once she looked in his face and saw it without a smile, stern,
+menacing and purposeful. Then he suddenly raised his hand and his
+smile came back like a gleam of sunshine. The hoarse signal of an
+incoming steamer's siren sounded in the harbour. Dicky called to the
+sentry who was pacing before the door: "What steamer comes?"
+
+"The _Catarina_."
+
+"Of the Vesuvius line?"
+
+"Without doubt, of that line."
+
+"Go you, _picarilla_," said Dicky joyously to Pasa, "to the American
+consul. Tell him I wish to speak with him. See that he comes at
+once. And look you! let me see a different look in those eyes, for I
+promise your head shall rest upon this arm to-night."
+
+It was an hour before the consul came. He held his green umbrella
+under his arm, and mopped his forehead impatiently.
+
+"Now, see here, Maloney," he began, captiously, "you fellows seem to
+think you can cut up any kind of row, and expect me to pull you out
+of it. I'm neither the War Department nor a gold mine. This country
+has its laws, you know, and there's one against pounding the senses
+out of the regular army. You Irish are forever getting into trouble.
+I don't see what I can do. Anything like tobacco, now, to make you
+comfortable--or newspapers--"
+
+"Son of Eli," interrupted Dicky, gravely, "you haven't changed an
+iota. That is almost a duplicate of the speech you made when old
+Koen's donkeys and geese got into the chapel loft, and the culprits
+wanted to hide in your room."
+
+"Oh, heavens!" exclaimed the consul, hurriedly adjusting his
+spectacles. "Are you a Yale man, too? Were you in that crowd? I don't
+seem to remember any one with red--any one named Maloney. Such a lot
+of college men seem to have misused their advantages. One of the best
+mathematicians of the class of '91 is selling lottery tickets in
+Belize. A Cornell man dropped off here last month. He was second
+steward on a guano boat. I'll write to the department if you like,
+Maloney. Or if there's any tobacco, or newspa--"
+
+"There's nothing," interrupted Dicky, shortly, "but this. You go tell
+the captain of the _Catarina_ that Dicky Maloney wants to see him as
+soon as he can conveniently come. Tell him where I am. Hurry. That's
+all."
+
+The consul, glad to be let off so easily, hurried away. The captain
+of the _Catarina_, a stout man, Sicilian born, soon appeared,
+shoving, with little ceremony, through the guards to the jail door.
+The Vesuvius Fruit Company had a habit of doing things that way in
+Anchuria.
+
+"I am exceedingly sorry--exceedingly sorry," said the captain, "to
+see this occur. I place myself at your service, Mr. Maloney. What you
+need shall be furnished. Whatever you say shall be done."
+
+Dicky looked at him unsmilingly. His red hair could not detract from
+his attitude of severe dignity as he stood, tall and calm, with his
+now grim mouth forming a horizontal line.
+
+"Captain De Lucco, I believe I still have funds in the hands of your
+company--ample and personal funds. I ordered a remittance last week.
+The money has not arrived. You know what is needed in this game.
+Money and money and more money. Why has it not been sent?"
+
+"By the _Cristobal_," replied De Lucco, gesticulating, "it was
+despatched. Where is the _Cristobal_? Off Cape Antonio I spoke her
+with a broken shaft. A tramp coaster was towing her back to New
+Orleans. I brought money ashore thinking your need for it might not
+withstand delay. In this envelope is one thousand dollars. There is
+more if you need it, Mr. Maloney."
+
+"For the present it will suffice," said Dicky, softening as he
+crinkled the envelope and looked down at the half-inch thickness of
+smooth, dingy bills.
+
+"The long green!" he said, gently, with a new reverence in his gaze.
+"Is there anything it will not buy, Captain?"
+
+"I had three friends," replied De Lucco, who was a bit of a
+philosopher, "who had money. One of them speculated in stocks and
+made ten million; another is in heaven, and the third married a poor
+girl whom he loved."
+
+"The answer, then," said Dicky, "is held by the Almighty, Wall Street
+and Cupid. So, the question remains."
+
+"This," queried the captain, including Dicky's surroundings in
+a significant gesture of his hand, "is it--it is not--it is not
+connected with the business of your little shop? There is no failure
+in your plans?"
+
+"No, no," said Dicky. "This is merely the result of a little private
+affair of mine, a digression from the regular line of business. They
+say for a complete life a man must know poverty, love and war. But
+they don't go well together, _capitn mio_. No; there is no failure
+in my business. The little shop is doing very well."
+
+When the captain had departed Dicky called the sergeant of the jail
+squad and asked:
+
+"Am I _preso_ by the military or by the civil authority?"
+
+"Surely there is no martial law in effect now, seor."
+
+"_Bueno_. Now go or send to the alcalde, the _Jues de la Paz_ and the
+_Jefe de los Policios_. Tell them I am prepared at once to satisfy
+the demands of justice." A folded bill of the "long green" slid into
+the sergeant's hand.
+
+Then Dicky's smile came back again, for he knew that the hours of his
+captivity were numbered; and he hummed, in time with the sentry's
+tread:
+
+
+ "_They're hanging men and women now,
+ For lacking of the green._"
+
+
+So, that night Dicky sat by the window of the room over his shop
+and his little saint sat close by, working at something silken and
+dainty. Dicky was thoughtful and grave. His red hair was in an
+unusual state of disorder. Pasa's fingers often ached to smooth and
+arrange it, but Dicky would never allow it. He was poring, to-night,
+over a great litter of maps and books and papers on his table until
+that perpendicular line came between his brows that always distressed
+Pasa. Presently she went and brought his hat, and stood with it until
+he looked up, inquiringly.
+
+"It is sad for you here," she explained. "Go out and drink _vino
+blanco_. Come back when you get that smile you used to wear. That is
+what I wish to see."
+
+Dicky laughed and threw down his papers. "The _vino blanco_ stage
+is past. It has served its turn. Perhaps, after all, there was less
+entered my mouth and more my ears than people thought. But, there
+will be no more maps or frowns to-night. I promise you that. Come."
+
+They sat upon a reed _silleta_ at the window and watched the
+quivering gleams from the lights of the _Catarina_ reflected in the
+harbour.
+
+Presently Pasa rippled out one of her infrequent chirrups of audible
+laughter.
+
+"I was thinking," she began, anticipating Dicky's question, "of the
+foolish things girls have in their minds. Because I went to school
+in the States I used to have ambitions. Nothing less than to be the
+president's wife would satisfy me. And, look, thou red picaroon, to
+what obscure fate thou hast stolen me!"
+
+"Don't give up hope," said Dicky, smiling. "More than one Irishman
+has been the ruler of a South American country. There was a dictator
+of Chili named O'Higgins. Why not a President Maloney, of Anchuria?
+Say the word, _santita mia_, and we'll make the race."
+
+"No, no, no, thou red-haired, reckless one!" sighed Pasa; "I am
+content"--she laid her head against his arm--"here."
+
+
+
+
+XVI
+
+ROUGE ET NOIR
+
+
+It has been indicated that disaffection followed the elevation of
+Losada to the presidency. This feeling continued to grow. Throughout
+the entire republic there seemed to be a spirit of silent, sullen
+discontent. Even the old Liberal party to which Goodwin, Zavalla and
+other patriots had lent their aid was disappointed. Losada had failed
+to become a popular idol. Fresh taxes, fresh import duties and, more
+than all, his tolerance of the outrageous oppression of citizens by
+the military had rendered him the most obnoxious president since
+the despicable Alforan. The majority of his own cabinet were out
+of sympathy with him. The army, which he had courted by giving it
+license to tyrannize, had been his main, and thus far adequate
+support.
+
+But the most impolitic of the administration's moves had been when it
+antagonized the Vesuvius Fruit Company, an organization plying twelve
+steamers and with a cash capital somewhat larger than Anchuria's
+surplus and debt combined.
+
+Reasonably an established concern like the Vesuvius would become
+irritated at having a small, retail republic with no rating at all
+attempt to squeeze it. So when the government proxies applied for
+a subsidy they encountered a polite refusal. The president at once
+retaliated by clapping an export duty of one _real_ per bunch on
+bananas--a thing unprecedented in fruit-growing countries. The
+Vesuvius Company had invested large sums in wharves and plantations
+along the Anchurian coast, their agents had erected fine homes in the
+towns where they had their headquarters, and heretofore had worked
+with the republic in good-will and with advantage to both. It would
+lose an immense sum if compelled to move out. The selling price
+of bananas from Vera Cruz to Trinidad was three _reals_ per bunch.
+This new duty of one _real_ would have ruined the fruit growers in
+Anchuria and have seriously discommoded the Vesuvius Company had it
+declined to pay it. But for some reason, the Vesuvius continued to
+buy Anchurian fruit, paying four _reals_ for it; and not suffering
+the growers to bear the loss.
+
+This apparent victory deceived His Excellency; and he began to hunger
+for more of it. He sent an emissary to request a conference with a
+representative of the fruit company. The Vesuvius sent Mr. Franzoni,
+a little, stout, cheerful man, always cool, and whistling airs from
+Verdi's operas. Seor Espirition, of the office of the Minister of
+Finance, attempted the sandbagging in behalf of Anchuria. The meeting
+took place in the cabin of the _Salvador_, of the Vesuvius line.
+
+Seor Espirition opened negotiations by announcing that the
+government contemplated the building of a railroad to skirt the
+alluvial coast lands. After touching upon the benefits such a road
+would confer upon the interests of the Vesuvius, he reached the
+definite suggestion that a contribution to the road's expenses of,
+say, fifty thousand _pesos_ would not be more than an equivalent to
+benefits received.
+
+Mr. Franzoni denied that his company would receive any benefits
+from a contemplated road. As its representative he must decline
+to contribute fifty thousand _pesos_. But he would assume the
+responsibility of offering twenty-five.
+
+Did Seor Espirition understand Seor Franzoni to mean twenty-five
+thousand _pesos_?
+
+By no means. Twenty-five _pesos_. And in silver; not in gold.
+
+"Your offer insults my government," cried Seor Espirition, rising
+with indignation.
+
+"Then," said Mr. Franzoni, in warning tone, "_we will change it_."
+
+The offer was never changed. Could Mr. Franzoni have meant the
+government?
+
+This was the state of affairs in Anchuria when the winter season
+opened at Coralio at the end of the second year of Losada's
+administration. So, when the government and society made its annual
+exodus to the seashore it was evident that the presidential advent
+would not be celebrated by unlimited rejoicing. The tenth of November
+was the day set for the entrance into Coralio of the gay company
+from the capital. A narrow-gauge railroad runs twenty miles into the
+interior from Solitas. The government party travels by carriage from
+San Mateo to this road's terminal point, and proceeds by train to
+Solitas. From here they march in grand procession to Coralio where,
+on the day of their coming, festivities and ceremonies abound. But
+this season saw an ominous dawning of the tenth of November.
+
+Although the rainy season was over, the day seemed to hark back to
+reeking June. A fine drizzle of rain fell all during the forenoon.
+The procession entered Coralio amid a strange silence.
+
+President Losada was an elderly man, grizzly bearded, with a
+considerable ratio of Indian blood revealed in his cinnamon
+complexion. His carriage headed the procession, surrounded and
+guarded by Captain Cruz and his famous troop of one hundred light
+horse "_El Ciento Huilando_." Colonel Rocas followed, with a regiment
+of the regular army.
+
+The president's sharp, beady eyes glanced about him for the expected
+demonstration of welcome; but he faced a stolid, indifferent array of
+citizens. Sight-seers the Anchurians are by birth and habit, and they
+turned out to their last able-bodied unit to witness the scene; but
+they maintained an accusive silence. They crowded the streets to the
+very wheel ruts; they covered the red tile roofs to the eaves, but
+there was never a "_viva_" from them. No wreaths of palm and lemon
+branches or gorgeous strings of paper roses hung from the windows and
+balconies as was the custom. There was an apathy, a dull, dissenting
+disapprobation, that was the more ominous because it puzzled. No
+one feared an outburst, a revolt of the discontents, for they had
+no leader. The president and those loyal to him had never even
+heard whispered a name among them capable of crystallizing the
+dissatisfaction into opposition. No, there could be no danger. The
+people always procured a new idol before they destroyed an old one.
+
+At length, after a prodigious galloping and curvetting of red-sashed
+majors, gold-laced colonels and epauletted generals, the procession
+formed for its annual progress down the Calle Grande to the Casa
+Morena, where the ceremony of welcome to the visiting president
+always took place.
+
+The Swiss band led the line of march. After it pranced the local
+_comandante_, mounted, and a detachment of his troops. Next came a
+carriage with four members of the cabinet, conspicuous among them
+the Minister of War, old General Pilar, with his white moustache and
+his soldierly bearing. Then the president's vehicle, containing also
+the Ministers of Finance and State; and surrounded by Captain Cruz's
+light horse formed in a close double file of fours. Following them,
+the rest of the officials of state, the judges and distinguished
+military and social ornaments of public and private life.
+
+As the band struck up, and the movement began, like a bird of
+ill-omen the _Valhalla_, the swiftest steamship of the Vesuvius line,
+glided into the harbour in plain view of the president and his train.
+Of course, there was nothing menacing about its arrival--a business
+firm does not go to war with a nation--but it reminded Seor
+Espirition and others in those carriages that the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company was undoubtedly carrying something up its sleeve for them.
+
+By the time the van of the procession had reached the government
+building, Captain Cronin, of the _Valhalla_, and Mr. Vincenti, member
+of the Vesuvius Company, had landed and were pushing their way,
+bluff, hearty and nonchalant, through the crowd on the narrow
+sidewalk. Clad in white linen, big, debonair, with an air of
+good-humoured authority, they made conspicuous figures among the
+dark mass of unimposing Anchurians, as they penetrated to within a
+few yards of the steps of the Casa Morena. Looking easily above the
+heads of the crowd, they perceived another that towered above the
+undersized natives. It was the fiery poll of Dicky Maloney against
+the wall close by the lower step; and his broad, seductive grin
+showed that he recognized their presence.
+
+Dicky had attired himself becomingly for the festive occasion in a
+well-fitting black suit. Pasa was close by his side, her head covered
+with the ubiquitous black mantilla.
+
+Mr. Vincenti looked at her attentively.
+
+"Botticelli's Madonna," he remarked, gravely. "I wonder when she got
+into the game. I don't like his getting tangled with the women. I
+hoped he would keep away from them."
+
+Captain Cronin's laugh almost drew attention from the parade.
+
+"With that head of hair! Keep away from the women! And a Maloney!
+Hasn't he got a license? But, nonsense aside, what do you think of
+the prospects? It's a species of filibustering out of my line."
+
+Vincenti glanced again at Dicky's head and smiled.
+
+"_Rouge et noir_," he said. "There you have it. Make your play,
+gentlemen. Our money is on the red."
+
+"The lad's game," said Cronin, with a commending look at the tall,
+easy figure by the steps. "But 'tis all like fly-by-night theatricals
+to me. The talk's bigger than the stage; there's a smell of gasoline
+in the air, and they're their own audience and scene-shifters."
+
+They ceased talking, for General Pilar had descended from the first
+carriage and had taken his stand upon the top step of Casa Morena. As
+the oldest member of the cabinet, custom had decreed that he should
+make the address of welcome, presenting the keys of the official
+residence to the president at its close.
+
+General Pilar was one of the most distinguished citizens of the
+republic. Hero of three wars and innumerable revolutions, he was an
+honoured guest at European courts and camps. An eloquent speaker
+and a friend to the people, he represented the highest type of the
+Anchurians.
+
+Holding in his hand the gilt keys of Casa Morena, he began his
+address in a historical form, touching upon each administration
+and the advance of civilization and prosperity from the first dim
+striving after liberty down to present times. Arriving at the
+rgime of President Losada, at which point, according to precedent,
+he should have delivered a eulogy upon its wise conduct and the
+happiness of the people, General Pilar paused. Then he silently held
+up the bunch of keys high above his head, with his eyes closely
+regarding it. The ribbon with which they were bound fluttered in the
+breeze.
+
+"It still blows," cried the speaker, exultantly. "Citizens of
+Anchuria, give thanks to the saints this night that our air is still
+free."
+
+Thus disposing of Losada's administration, he abruptly reverted
+to that of Olivarra, Anchuria's most popular ruler. Olivarra had
+been assassinated nine years before while in the prime of life and
+usefulness. A faction of the Liberal party led by Losada himself had
+been accused of the deed. Whether guilty or not, it was eight years
+before the ambitious and scheming Losada had gained his goal.
+
+Upon this theme General Pilar's eloquence was loosed. He drew the
+picture of the beneficent Olivarra with a loving hand. He reminded
+the people of the peace, the security and the happiness they had
+enjoyed during that period. He recalled in vivid detail and with
+significant contrast the last winter sojourn of President Olivarra
+in Coralio, when his appearance at their fiestas was the signal for
+thundering _vivas_ of love and approbation.
+
+The first public expression of sentiment from the people that day
+followed. A low, sustained murmur went among them like the surf
+rolling along the shore.
+
+"Ten dollars to a dinner at the Saint Charles," remarked Mr.
+Vincenti, "that _rouge_ wins."
+
+"I never bet against my own interests," said Captain Cronin, lighting
+a cigar. "Long-winded old boy, for his age. What's he talking about?"
+
+"My Spanish," replied Vincenti, "runs about ten words to the minute;
+his is something around two hundred. Whatever he's saying, he's
+getting them warmed up."
+
+"Friends and brothers," General Pilar was saying, "could I reach
+out my hand this day across the lamentable silence of the grave to
+Olivarra 'the Good,' to the ruler who was one of you, whose tears
+fell when you sorrowed, and whose smile followed your joy--I would
+bring him back to you, but--Olivarra is dead--dead at the hands of a
+craven assassin!"
+
+The speaker turned and gazed boldly into the carriage of the
+president. His arm remained extended aloft as if to sustain his
+peroration. The president was listening, aghast, at this remarkable
+address of welcome. He was sunk back upon his seat, trembling with
+rage and dumb surprise, his dark hands tightly gripping the carriage
+cushions.
+
+Half rising, he extended one arm toward the speaker, and shouted a
+harsh command at Captain Cruz. The leader of the "Flying Hundred"
+sat his horse, immovable, with folded arms, giving no sign of having
+heard. Losada sank back again, his dark features distinctly paling.
+
+"Who says that Olivarra is dead?" suddenly cried the speaker, his
+voice, old as he was, sounding like a battle trumpet. "His body
+lies in the grave, but to the people he loved he has bequeathed his
+spirit--yes, more--his learning, his courage, his kindness--yes,
+more--his youth, his image--people of Anchuria, have you forgotten
+Ramon, the son of Olivarra?"
+
+Cronin and Vincenti, watching closely, saw Dicky Maloney suddenly
+raise his hat, tear off his shock of red hair, leap up the steps and
+stand at the side of General Pilar. The Minister of War laid his
+arm across the young man's shoulders. All who had known President
+Olivarra saw again his same lion-like pose, the same frank, undaunted
+expression, the same high forehead with the peculiar line of the
+clustering, crisp black hair.
+
+General Pilar was an experienced orator. He seized the moment of
+breathless silence that preceded the storm.
+
+"Citizens of Anchuria," he trumpeted, holding aloft the keys to Casa
+Morena, "I am here to deliver these keys--the keys to your homes and
+liberty--to your chosen president. Shall I deliver them to Enrico
+Olivarra's assassin, or to his son?"
+
+"Olivarra! Olivarra!" the crowd shrieked and howled. All vociferated
+the magic name--men, women, children and the parrots.
+
+And the enthusiasm was not confined to the blood of the plebs.
+Colonel Rocas ascended the steps and laid his sword theatrically at
+young Ramon Olivarra's feet. Four members of the cabinet embraced
+him. Captain Cruz gave a command, and twenty of _El Ciento Huilando_
+dismounted and arranged themselves in a cordon about the steps of
+Casa Morena.
+
+But Ramon Olivarra seized that moment to prove himself a born genius
+and politician. He waved those soldiers aside, and descended the
+steps to the street. There, without losing his dignity or the
+distinguished elegance that the loss of his red hair brought him,
+he took the proletariat to his bosom--the barefooted, the dirty,
+Indians, Caribs, babies, beggars, old, young, saints, soldiers and
+sinners--he missed none of them.
+
+While this act of the drama was being presented, the scene shifters
+had been busy at the duties that had been assigned to them. Two
+of Cruz's dragoons had seized the bridle reins of Losada's horses;
+others formed a close guard around the carriage; and they galloped
+off with the tyrant and his two unpopular Ministers. No doubt a place
+had been prepared for them. There are a number of well-barred stone
+apartments in Coralio.
+
+"_Rouge_ wins," said Mr. Vincenti, calmly lighting another cigar.
+
+Captain Cronin had been intently watching the vicinity of the stone
+steps for some time.
+
+"Good boy!" he exclaimed suddenly, as if relieved. "I wondered if he
+was going to forget his Kathleen Mavourneen."
+
+Young Olivarra had reascended the steps and spoken a few words to
+General Pilar. Then that distinguished veteran descended to the
+ground and approached Pasa, who still stood, wonder-eyed, where Dicky
+had left her. With his plumed hat in his hand, and his medals and
+decorations shining on his breast, the general spoke to her and gave
+her his arm, and they went up the stone steps of the Casa Morena
+together. And then Ramon Olivarra stepped forward and took both her
+hands before all the people.
+
+And while the cheering was breaking out afresh everywhere, Captain
+Cronin and Mr. Vincenti turned and walked back toward the shore where
+the gig was waiting for them.
+
+"There'll be another '_presidente proclamada_' in the morning,"
+said Mr. Vincenti, musingly. "As a rule they are not as reliable as
+the elected ones, but this youngster seems to have some good stuff
+in him. He planned and manoeuvred the entire campaign. Olivarra's
+widow, you know, was wealthy. After her husband was assassinated
+she went to the States, and educated her son at Yale. The Vesuvius
+Company hunted him up, and backed him in the little game."
+
+"It's a glorious thing," said Cronin, half jestingly, "to be able to
+discharge a government, and insert one of your own choosing, in these
+days."
+
+"Oh, it is only a matter of business," said Vincenti, stopping and
+offering the stump of his cigar to a monkey that swung down from a
+lime tree; "and that is what moves the world of to-day. That extra
+_real_ on the price of bananas had to go. We took the shortest way of
+removing it."
+
+
+
+
+XVII
+
+TWO RECALLS
+
+
+There remains three duties to be performed before the curtain falls
+upon the patched comedy. Two have been promised: the third is no less
+obligatory.
+
+It was set forth in the programme of this tropic vaudeville that
+it would be made known why Shorty O'Day, of the Columbia Detective
+Agency, lost his position. Also that Smith should come again to tell
+us what mystery he followed that night on the shores of Anchuria when
+he strewed so many cigar stumps around the cocoanut palm during his
+lonely night vigil on the beach. These things were promised; but a
+bigger thing yet remains to be accomplished--the clearing up of a
+seeming wrong that has been done according to the array of chronicled
+facts (truthfully set forth) that have been presented. And one voice,
+speaking, shall do these three things.
+
+Two men sat on a stringer of a North River pier in the City of New
+York. A steamer from the tropics had begun to unload bananas and
+oranges on the pier. Now and then a banana or two would fall from an
+overripe bunch, and one of the two men would shamble forward, seize
+the fruit and return to share it with his companion.
+
+One of the men was in the ultimate stage of deterioration. As far as
+rain and wind and sun could wreck the garments he wore, it had been
+done. In his person the ravages of drink were as plainly visible. And
+yet, upon his high-bridged, rubicund nose was jauntily perched a pair
+of shining and flawless gold-rimmed glasses.
+
+The other man was not so far gone upon the descending Highway of the
+Incompetents. Truly, the flower of his manhood had gone to seed--seed
+that, perhaps, no soil might sprout. But there were still cross-cuts
+along where he travelled through which he might yet regain the
+pathway of usefulness without disturbing the slumbering Miracles.
+This man was short and compactly built. He had an oblique, dead eye,
+like that of a sting-ray, and the moustache of a cocktail mixer. We
+know the eye and the moustache; we know that Smith of the luxurious
+yacht, the gorgeous raiment, the mysterious mission, the magic
+disappearance, has come again, though shorn of the accessories of his
+former state.
+
+At his third banana, the man with the nose glasses spat it from him
+with a shudder.
+
+"Deuce take all fruit!" he remarked, in a patrician tone of disgust.
+"I lived for two years where these things grow. The memory of their
+taste lingers with you. The oranges are not so bad. Just see if you
+can gather a couple of them, O'Day, when the next broken crate comes
+up."
+
+"Did you live down with the monkeys?" asked the other, made tepidly
+garrulous by the sunshine and the alleviating meal of juicy fruit. "I
+was down there, once myself. But only for a few hours. That was when
+I was with the Columbia Detective Agency. The monkey people did me
+up. I'd have my job yet if it hadn't been for them. I'll tell you
+about it.
+
+"One day the chief sent a note around to the office that read: 'Send
+O'Day here at once for a big piece of business.' I was the crack
+detective of the agency at that time. They always handed me the big
+jobs. The address the chief wrote from was down in the Wall Street
+district.
+
+"When I got there I found him in a private office with a lot of
+directors who were looking pretty fuzzy. They stated the case. The
+president of the Republic Insurance Company had skipped with about
+a tenth of a million dollars in cash. The directors wanted him back
+pretty bad, but they wanted the money worse. They said they needed
+it. They had traced the old gent's movements to where he boarded a
+tramp fruit steamer bound for South America that same morning with
+his daughter and a big gripsack--all the family he had.
+
+"One of the directors had his steam yacht coaled and with steam up,
+ready for the trip; and he turned her over to me, cart blongsh. In
+four hours I was on board of her, and hot on the trail of the fruit
+tub. I had a pretty good idea where old Wahrfield--that was his name,
+J. Churchill Wahrfield--would head for. At that time we had a treaty
+with about every foreign country except Belgium and that banana
+republic, Anchuria. There wasn't a photo of old Wahrfield to be
+had in New York--he had been foxy there--but I had his description.
+And besides, the lady with him would be a dead-give-away anywhere.
+She was one of the high-flyers in Society--not the kind that have
+their pictures in the Sunday papers--but the real sort that open
+chrysanthemum shows and christen battleships.
+
+"Well, sir, we never got a sight of that fruit tub on the road. The
+ocean is a pretty big place; and I guess we took different paths
+across it. But we kept going toward this Anchuria, where the fruiter
+was bound for.
+
+"We struck the monkey coast one afternoon about four. There was a
+ratty-looking steamer off shore taking on bananas. The monkeys were
+loading her up with big barges. It might be the one the old man had
+taken, and it might not. I went ashore to look around. The scenery
+was pretty good. I never saw any finer on the New York stage. I
+struck an American on shore, a big, cool chap, standing around with
+the monkeys. He showed me the consul's office. The consul was a
+nice young fellow. He said the fruiter was the _Karlsefin_, running
+generally to New Orleans, but took her last cargo to New York. Then
+I was sure my people were on board, although everybody told me that
+no passengers had landed. I didn't think they would land until after
+dark, for they might have been shy about it on account of seeing that
+yacht of mine hanging around. So, all I had to do was to wait and nab
+'em when they came ashore. I couldn't arrest old Wahrfield without
+extradition papers, but my play was to get the cash. They generally
+give up if you strike 'em when they're tired and rattled and short on
+nerve.
+
+"After dark I sat under a cocoanut tree on the beach for a while,
+and then I walked around and investigated that town some, and it was
+enough to give you the lions. If a man could stay in New York and
+be honest, he'd better do it than to hit that monkey town with a
+million.
+
+"Dinky little mud houses; grass over your shoe tops in the streets;
+ladies in low-neck-and-short-sleeves walking around smoking cigars;
+tree frogs rattling like a hose cart going to a ten blow; big
+mountains dropping gravel in the back yards, and the sea licking the
+paint off in front--no, sir--a man had better be in God's country
+living on free lunch than there.
+
+"The main street ran along the beach, and I walked down it, and
+then turned up a kind of lane where the houses were made of poles
+and straw. I wanted to see what the monkeys did when they weren't
+climbing cocoanut trees. The very first shack I looked in I saw
+my people. They must have come ashore while I was promenading. A
+man about fifty, smooth face, heavy eyebrows, dressed in black
+broadcloth, looking like he was just about to say, 'Can any little
+boy in the Sunday school answer that?' He was freezing on to a grip
+that weighed like a dozen gold bricks, and a swell girl--a regular
+peach, with a Fifth Avenue cut--was sitting on a wooden chair. An old
+black woman was fixing some coffee and beans on a table. The light
+they had come from a lantern hung on a nail. I went and stood in the
+door, and they looked at me, and I said:
+
+"'Mr. Wahrfield, you are my prisoner. I hope, for the lady's sake,
+you will take the matter sensibly. You know why I want you.'
+
+"'Who are you?' says the old gent.
+
+"'O'Day,' says I, 'of the Columbia Detective Agency. And now, sir,
+let me give you a piece of good advice. You go back and take your
+medicine like a man. Hand 'em back the boodle; and maybe they'll let
+you off light. Go back easy, and I'll put in a word for you. I'll
+give you five minutes to decide.' I pulled out my watch and waited.
+
+"Then the young lady chipped in. She was one of the genuine
+high-steppers. You could tell by the way her clothes fit and the
+style she had that Fifth Avenue was made for her.
+
+"'Come inside,' she says. 'Don't stand in the door and disturb the
+whole street with that suit of clothes. Now, what is it you want?'
+
+"'Three minutes gone,' I said. 'I'll tell you again while the other
+two tick off.
+
+"'You'll admit being the president of the Republic, won't you?'
+
+"'I am,' says he.
+
+"'Well, then,' says I, 'it ought to be plain to you. Wanted, in New
+York, J. Churchill Wahrfield, president of the Republic Insurance
+Company.
+
+"'Also the funds belonging to said company, now in that grip, in the
+unlawful possession of said J. Churchill Wahrfield.'
+
+"'Oh-h-h-h!' says the young lady, as if she was thinking, 'you want
+to take us back to New York?'
+
+"'To take Mr. Wahrfield. There's no charge against you, miss.
+There'll be no objection, of course, to your returning with your
+father.'
+
+"Of a sudden the girl gave a tiny scream and grabbed the old boy
+around the neck. 'Oh, father, father!' she says, kind of contralto,
+'can this be true? Have you taken money that is not yours? Speak,
+father!' It made you shiver to hear the tremolo stop she put on her
+voice.
+
+"The old boy looked pretty bughouse when she first grappled him, but
+she went on, whispering in his ear and patting his off shoulder till
+he stood still, but sweating a little.
+
+"She got him to one side and they talked together a minute, and then
+he put on some gold eyeglasses and walked up and handed me the grip.
+
+"'Mr. Detective,' he says, talking a little broken, 'I conclude
+to return with you. I have finished to discover that life on this
+desolate and displeased coast would be worse than to die, itself. I
+will go back and hurl myself upon the mercy of the Republic Company.
+Have you brought a sheep?'
+
+"'Sheep!' says I; 'I haven't a single--'
+
+"'Ship,' cut in the young lady. 'Don't get funny. Father is of German
+birth, and doesn't speak perfect English. How did you come?'
+
+"The girl was all broke up. She had a handkerchief to her face, and
+kept saying every little bit, 'Oh, father, father!' She walked up to
+me and laid her lily-white hand on the clothes that had pained her at
+first. I smelt a million violets. She was a lulu. I told her I came
+in a private yacht.
+
+"'Mr. O'Day,' she says. 'Oh, take us away from this horrid country at
+once. Can you! Will you! Say you will.'
+
+"'I'll try,' I said, concealing the fact that I was dying to get them
+on salt water before they could change their mind.
+
+"One thing they both kicked against was going through the town to the
+boat landing. Said they dreaded publicity, and now that they were
+going to return, they had a hope that the thing might yet be kept out
+of the papers. They swore they wouldn't go unless I got them out to
+the yacht without any one knowing it, so I agreed to humour them.
+
+"The sailors who rowed me ashore were playing billiards in a bar-room
+near the water, waiting for orders, and I proposed to have them take
+the boat down the beach half a mile or so, and take us up there. How
+to get them word was the question, for I couldn't leave the grip with
+the prisoner, and I couldn't take it with me, not knowing but what
+the monkeys might stick me up.
+
+"The young lady says the old coloured woman would take them a note. I
+sat down and wrote it, and gave it to the dame with plain directions
+what to do, and she grins like a baboon and shakes her head.
+
+"Then Mr. Wahrfield handed her a string of foreign dialect, and she
+nods her head and says, 'See, seor,' maybe fifty times, and lights
+out with the note.
+
+"'Old Augusta only understands German,' said Miss Wahrfield, smiling
+at me. 'We stopped in her house to ask where we could find lodging,
+and she insisted upon our having coffee. She tells us she was raised
+in a German family in San Domingo.'
+
+"'Very likely,' I said. 'But you can search me for German words,
+except _nix verstay_ and _noch einst_. I would have called that "See,
+seor" French, though, on a gamble.'
+
+"Well, we three made a sneak around the edge of town so as not to
+be seen. We got tangled in vines and ferns and the banana bushes
+and tropical scenery a good deal. The monkey suburbs was as wild as
+places in Central Park. We came out on the beach a good half mile
+below. A brown chap was lying asleep under a cocoanut tree, with
+a ten-foot musket beside him. Mr. Wahrfield takes up the gun and
+pitches it into the sea. 'The coast is guarded,' he says. 'Rebellion
+and plots ripen like fruit.' He pointed to the sleeping man, who
+never stirred. 'Thus,' he says, 'they perform trusts. Children!'
+
+"I saw our boat coming, and I struck a match and lit a piece of
+newspaper to show them where we were. In thirty minutes we were on
+board the yacht.
+
+"The first thing, Mr. Wahrfield and his daughter and I took the grip
+into the owner's cabin, opened it up, and took an inventory. There
+was one hundred and five thousand dollars, United States treasury
+notes, in it, besides a lot of diamond jewelry and a couple of
+hundred Havana cigars. I gave the old man the cigars and a receipt
+for the rest of the lot, as agent for the company, and locked the
+stuff up in my private quarters.
+
+"I never had a pleasanter trip than that one. After we got to
+sea the young lady turned out to be the jolliest ever. The very
+first time we sat down to dinner, and the steward filled her glass
+with champagne--that director's yacht was a regular floating
+Waldorf-Astoria--she winks at me and says, 'What's the use to borrow
+trouble, Mr. Fly Cop? Here's hoping you may live to eat the hen that
+scratches on your grave.' There was a piano on board, and she sat
+down to it and sung better than you give up two cases to hear plenty
+times. She knew about nine operas clear through. She was sure enough
+_bon ton_ and swell. She wasn't one of the 'among others present'
+kind; she belonged on the special mention list!
+
+"The old man, too, perked up amazingly on the way. He passed the
+cigars, and says to me once, quite chipper, out of a cloud of smoke,
+'Mr. O'Day, somehow I think the Republic Company will not give me the
+much trouble. Guard well the gripvalise of the money, Mr. O'Day, for
+that it must be returned to them that it belongs when we finish to
+arrive.'
+
+"When we landed in New York I 'phoned to the chief to meet us in that
+director's office. We got in a cab and went there. I carried the
+grip, and we walked in, and I was pleased to see that the chief had
+got together that same old crowd of moneybugs with pink faces and
+white vests to see us march in. I set the grip on the table. 'There's
+the money,' I said.
+
+"'And your prisoner?' said the chief.
+
+"I pointed to Mr. Wahrfield, and he stepped forward and says:
+
+"'The honour of a word with you, sir, to explain.'
+
+"He and the chief went into another room and stayed ten minutes. When
+they came back the chief looked as black as a ton of coal.
+
+"'Did this gentleman,' he says to me, 'have this valise in his
+possession when you first saw him?'
+
+"'He did,' said I.
+
+"The chief took up the grip and handed it to the prisoner with a
+bow, and says to the director crowd: 'Do any of you recognize this
+gentleman?'
+
+"They all shook their pink faces.
+
+"'Allow me to present,' he goes on, Seor Miraflores, president of
+the republic of Anchuria. The seor has generously consented to
+overlook this outrageous blunder, on condition that we undertake
+to secure him against the annoyance of public comment. It is a
+concession on his part to overlook an insult for which he might claim
+international redress. I think we can gratefully promise him secrecy
+in the matter.'
+
+"They gave him a pink nod all round.
+
+"'O'Day,' he says to me. 'As a private detective you're wasted.
+In a war, where kidnapping governments is in the rules, you'd be
+invaluable. Come down to the office at eleven.'
+
+"I knew what that meant.
+
+"'So that's the president of the monkeys,' says I. 'Well, why
+couldn't he have said so?'
+
+"Wouldn't it jar you?"
+
+
+
+
+XVIII
+
+THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE
+
+
+Vaudeville is intrinsically episodic and discontinuous. Its audiences
+do not demand dnoements. Sufficient unto each "turn" is the evil
+thereof. No one cares how many romances the singing comdienne may
+have had if she can capably sustain the limelight and a high note or
+two. The audiences reck not if the performing dogs get to the pound
+the moment they have jumped through their last hoop. They do not
+desire bulletins about the possible injuries received by the comic
+bicyclist who retires head-first from the stage in a crash of
+(property) china-ware. Neither do they consider that their seat
+coupons entitle them to be instructed whether or no there is a
+sentiment between the lady solo banjoist and the Irish monologist.
+
+Therefore let us have no lifting of the curtain upon a tableau of the
+united lovers, backgrounded by defeated villainy and derogated by the
+comic, osculating maid and butler, thrown in as a sop to the Cerberi
+of the fifty-cent seats.
+
+But our programme ends with a brief "turn" or two; and then to the
+exits. Whoever sits the show out may find, if he will, the slender
+thread that binds together, though ever so slightly, the story that,
+perhaps, only the Walrus will understand.
+
+
+_Extracts from a letter from the first vice-president of the Republic
+Insurance Company, of New York City, to Frank Goodwin, of Coralio,
+Republic of Anchuria._
+
+
+ My Dear Mr. Goodwin:--Your communication per Messrs.
+ Howland and Fourchet, of New Orleans, has reached us. Also
+ their draft on N. Y. for $100,000, the amount abstracted
+ from the funds of this company by the late J. Churchill
+ Wahrfield, its former president. . . . The officers
+ and directors unite in requesting me to express to you
+ their sincere esteem and thanks for your prompt and much
+ appreciated return of the entire missing sum within two
+ weeks from the time of its disappearance. . . . Can assure
+ you that the matter will not be allowed to receive the
+ least publicity. . . . Regret exceedingly the distressing
+ death of Mr. Wahrfield by his own hand, but . . .
+ Congratulations on your marriage to Miss Wahrfield . . .
+ many charms, winning manners, noble and womanly nature and
+ envied position in the best metropolitan society. . . .
+
+ Cordially yours,
+
+ LUCIUS E. APPLEGATE,
+ First Vice-President the Republic Insurance Company.
+
+
+
+The Vitagraphoscope
+(Moving Pictures)
+
+The Last Sausage
+
+SCENE--_An Artist's Studio._ The artist, a young man of prepossessing
+appearance, sits in a dejected attitude, amid a litter of sketches,
+with his head resting upon his hand. An oil stove stands on a pine
+box in the centre of the studio. The artist rises, tightens his waist
+belt to another hole, and lights the stove. He goes to a tin bread
+box, half-hidden by a screen, takes out a solitary link of sausage,
+turns the box upside-down to show that there is no more, and chucks
+the sausage into a frying-pan, which he sets upon the stove. The
+flame of the stove goes out, showing that there is no more oil. The
+artist, in evident despair, seizes the sausage, in a sudden access of
+rage, and hurls it violently from him. At the same time a door opens,
+and a man who enters receives the sausage forcibly against his nose.
+He seems to cry out; and is observed to make a dance step or two,
+vigorously. The newcomer is a ruddy-faced, active, keen-looking
+man, apparently of Irish ancestry. Next he is observed to laugh
+immoderately; he kicks over the stove; he claps the artist (who is
+vainly striving to grasp his hand) vehemently upon the back. Then
+he goes through a pantomime which to the sufficiently intelligent
+spectator reveals that he has acquired large sums of money by trading
+pot-metal hatchets and razors to the Indians of the Cordillera
+Mountains for gold dust. He draws a roll of money as large as a small
+loaf of bread from his pocket, and waves it above his head, while at
+the same time he makes pantomime of drinking from a glass. The artist
+hurriedly secures his hat, and the two leave the studio together.
+
+
+The Writing on the Sands
+
+SCENE--_The Beach at Nice._ A woman, beautiful, still young,
+exquisitely clothed, complacent, poised, reclines near the water,
+idly scrawling letters in the sand with the staff of her silken
+parasol. The beauty of her face is audacious; her languid pose is one
+that you feel to be impermanent--you wait, expectant, for her to
+spring or glide or crawl, like a panther that has unaccountably
+become stock-still. She idly scrawls in the sand; and the word that
+she always writes is "Isabel." A man sits a few yards away. You can
+see that they are companions, even if no longer comrades. His face is
+dark and smooth, and almost inscrutable--but not quite. The two speak
+little together. The man also scratches on the sand with his cane.
+And the word that he writes is "Anchuria." And then he looks out
+where the Mediterranean and the sky intermingle, with death in his
+gaze.
+
+
+The Wilderness and Thou
+
+SCENE--_The Borders of a Gentleman's Estate in a Tropical Land._ An
+old Indian, with a mahogany-coloured face, is trimming the grass on a
+grave by a mangrove swamp. Presently he rises to his feet and walks
+slowly toward a grove that is shaded by the gathering, brief
+twilight. In the edge of the grove stand a man who is stalwart, with
+a kind and courteous air, and a woman of a serene and clear-cut
+loveliness. When the old Indian comes up to them the man drops money
+in his hand. The grave-tender, with the stolid pride of his race,
+takes it as his due, and goes his way. The two in the edge of the
+grove turn back along the dim pathway, and walk close, close--for,
+after all, what is the world at its best but a little round field of
+the moving pictures with two walking together in it?
+
+CURTAIN
+
+
+
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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Cabbages and Kings, by O. Henry
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: Cabbages and Kings
+
+
+Author: O. Henry
+
+
+
+Release Date: July 23, 2000 [eBook #2777]
+Most recently updated June 5, 2019
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CABBAGES AND KINGS***
+
+
+E-text prepared by Earle C. Beach
+and revised by Joseph E. Loewenstein, M.D.
+
+
+
+Editorial note:
+
+ This volume is the only work of O. Henry which approaches
+ being a novel. The stories are related and should be read
+ in the sequence in which they occur in the text.
+
+
+ Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this
+ file which includes the original illustration.
+ See 2777-h.htm or 2777-h.zip:
+ (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/7/7/2777/2777-h/24910-h.htm)
+ or
+ (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/7/7/2777/2777-h.zip)
+
+
+
+
+
+CABBAGES AND KINGS
+
+by
+
+O. HENRY
+
+Author of "The Four Million," "The Voice of the City,"
+"The Trimmed Lamp," "Strictly Business," "Whirligigs," Etc.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[ILLUSTRATION: "A little saint with a color more lightful
+than orange" (frontispiece)]
+
+
+
+
+"The time has come," the Walrus said,
+ "To talk of many things;
+Of shoes and ships and sealing-wax,
+ And cabbages and kings."
+
+ THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER
+
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+ THE PROEM: BY THE CARPENTER
+ I. "FOX-IN-THE-MORNING"
+ II. THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE
+ III. SMITH
+ IV. CAUGHT
+ V. CUPID'S EXILE NUMBER TWO
+ VI. THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT
+ VII. MONEY MAZE
+ VIII. THE ADMIRAL
+ IX. THE FLAG PARAMOUNT
+ X. THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM
+ XI. THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE
+ XII. SHOES
+ XIII. SHIPS
+ XIV. MASTERS OF ARTS
+ XV. DICKY
+ XVI. ROUGE ET NOIR
+ XVII. TWO RECALLS
+ XVIII. THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE
+
+
+
+
+THE PROEM
+
+BY THE CARPENTER
+
+
+They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that
+volatile republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio;
+that he had reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of
+an imminent revolution; and that one hundred thousand dollars,
+government funds, which he carried with him in an American leather
+valise as a souvenir of his tempestuous administration, was never
+afterward recovered.
+
+For a _real_, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town
+near a little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of
+wood stands at its head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with
+a hot iron this inscription:
+
+
+ RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES
+
+ Y MIRAFLORES
+
+ PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA
+
+ DE ANCHURIA
+
+ QUE SEA SU JUEZ DIOS
+
+
+It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man
+beyond the grave. "Let God be his judge!"--Even with the hundred
+thousand unfound, though greatly coveted, the hue and cry went no
+further than that.
+
+To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the
+story of the tragic end of their former president; how he strove to
+escape from the country with the public funds and also with Dona
+Isabel Guilbert, the young American opera singer; and how, being
+apprehended by members of the opposing political party in Coralio,
+he shot himself through the head rather than give up the funds, and,
+in consequence, the Senorita Guilbert. They will relate further
+that Dona Isabel, her adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the
+simultaneous loss of her distinguished admirer and the souvenir
+hundred thousand, dropped anchor on this stagnant coast, awaiting a
+rising tide.
+
+They say, in Coralio, that she found a prompt and prosperous tide
+in the form of Frank Goodwin, an American resident of the town, an
+investor who had grown wealthy by dealing in the products of the
+country--a banana king, a rubber prince, a sarsaparilla, indigo, and
+mahogany baron. The Senorita Guilbert, you will be told, married
+Senor Goodwin one month after the president's death, thus, in the
+very moment when Fortune had ceased to smile, wresting from her a
+gift greater than the prize withdrawn.
+
+Of the American, Don Frank Goodwin, and of his wife the natives have
+nothing but good to say. Don Frank has lived among them for years,
+and has compelled their respect. His lady is easily queen of what
+social life the sober coast affords. The wife of the governor of the
+district, herself, who was of the proud Castilian family of Monteleon
+y Dolorosa de los Santos y Mendez, feels honoured to unfold her
+napkin with olive-hued, ringed hands at the table of Senora Goodwin.
+Were you to refer (with your northern prejudices) to the vivacious
+past of Mrs. Goodwin when her audacious and gleeful abandon in light
+opera captured the mature president's fancy, or to her share in that
+statesman's downfall and malfeasance, the Latin shrug of the shoulder
+would be your only answer and rebuttal. What prejudices there were
+in Coralio concerning Senora Goodwin seemed now to be in her favour,
+whatever they had been in the past.
+
+It would seem that the story is ended, instead of begun; that the
+close of tragedy and the climax of a romance have covered the ground
+of interest; but, to the more curious reader it shall be some slight
+instruction to trace the close threads that underlie the ingenuous
+web of circumstances.
+
+The headpiece bearing the name of President Miraflores is daily
+scrubbed with soap-bark and sand. An old half-breed Indian tends the
+grave with fidelity and the dawdling minuteness of inherited sloth.
+He chops down the weeds and ever-springing grass with his machete, he
+plucks ants and scorpions and beetles from it with his horny fingers,
+and sprinkles its turf with water from the plaza fountain. There is
+no grave anywhere so well kept and ordered.
+
+Only by following out the underlying threads will it be made clear
+why the old Indian, Galvez, is secretly paid to keep green the
+grave of President Miraflores by one who never saw that unfortunate
+statesman in life or in death, and why that one was wont to walk in
+the twilight, casting from a distance looks of gentle sadness upon
+that unhonoured mound.
+
+Elsewhere than at Coralio one learns of the impetuous career
+of Isabel Guilbert. New Orleans gave her birth and the mingled
+French and Spanish creole nature that tinctured her life with such
+turbulence and warmth. She had little education, but a knowledge of
+men and motives that seemed to have come by instinct. Far beyond the
+common woman was she endowed with intrepid rashness, with a love for
+the pursuit of adventure to the brink of danger, and with desire for
+the pleasures of life. Her spirit was one to chafe under any curb;
+she was Eve after the fall, but before the bitterness of it was felt.
+She wore life as a rose in her bosom.
+
+Of the legion of men who had been at her feet it was said that but
+one was so fortunate as to engage her fancy. To President Miraflores,
+the brilliant but unstable ruler of Anchuria, she yielded the key to
+her resolute heart. How, then, do we find her (as the Coralians would
+have told you) the wife of Frank Goodwin, and happily living a life
+of dull and dreamy inaction?
+
+The underlying threads reach far, stretching across the sea.
+Following them out it will be made plain why "Shorty" O'Day, of the
+Columbia Detective Agency, resigned his position. And, for a lighter
+pastime, it shall be a duty and a pleasing sport to wander with Momus
+beneath the tropic stars where Melpomene once stalked austere. Now to
+cause laughter to echo from those lavish jungles and frowning crags
+where formerly rang the cries of pirates' victims; to lay aside pike
+and cutlass and attack with quip and jollity; to draw one saving
+titter of mirth from the rusty casque of Romance--this were pleasant
+to do in the shade of the lemon-trees on that coast that is curved
+like lips set for smiling.
+
+For there are yet tales of the Spanish Main. That segment of
+continent washed by the tempestuous Caribbean, and presenting to the
+sea a formidable border of tropical jungle topped by the overweening
+Cordilleras, is still begirt by mystery and romance. In past times
+buccaneers and revolutionists roused the echoes of its cliffs, and
+the condor wheeled perpetually above where, in the green groves,
+they made food for him with their matchlocks and toledos. Taken and
+retaken by sea rovers, by adverse powers and by sudden uprising of
+rebellious factions, the historic 300 miles of adventurous coast has
+scarcely known for hundreds of years whom rightly to call its master.
+Pizarro, Balboa, Sir Francis Drake, and Bolivar did what they could
+to make it a part of Christendom. Sir John Morgan, Lafitte and other
+eminent swash-bucklers bombarded and pounded it in the name of
+Abaddon.
+
+The game still goes on. The guns of the rovers are silenced; but the
+tintype man, the enlarged photograph brigand, the kodaking tourist
+and the scouts of the gentle brigade of fakirs have found it out, and
+carry on the work. The hucksters of Germany, France, and Sicily now
+bag its small change across their counters. Gentleman adventurers
+throng the waiting-rooms of its rulers with proposals for railways
+and concessions. The little _opera-bouffe_ nations play at government
+and intrigue until some day a big, silent gunboat glides into the
+offing and warns them not to break their toys. And with these changes
+comes also the small adventurer, with empty pockets to fill, light of
+heart, busy-brained--the modern fairy prince, bearing an alarm clock
+with which, more surely than by the sentimental kiss, to awaken the
+beautiful tropics from their centuries' sleep. Generally he wears a
+shamrock, which he matches pridefully against the extravagant palms;
+and it is he who has driven Melpomene to the wings, and set Comedy to
+dancing before the footlights of the Southern Cross.
+
+So, there is a little tale to tell of many things. Perhaps to the
+promiscuous ear of the Walrus it shall come with most avail; for in
+it there are indeed shoes and ships and sealing-wax and cabbage-palms
+and presidents instead of kings.
+
+Add to these a little love and counterplotting, and scatter
+everywhere throughout the maze a trail of tropical dollars--dollars
+warmed no more by the torrid sun than by the hot palms of the scouts
+of Fortune--and, after all, here seems to be Life, itself, with talk
+enough to weary the most garrulous of Walruses.
+
+
+
+
+I
+
+"FOX-IN-THE-MORNING"
+
+
+Coralio reclined, in the mid-day heat, like some vacuous beauty
+lounging in a guarded harem. The town lay at the sea's edge on a
+strip of alluvial coast. It was set like a little pearl in an emerald
+band. Behind it, and seeming almost to topple, imminent, above it,
+rose the sea-following range of the Cordilleras. In front the sea
+was spread, a smiling jailer, but even more incorruptible than the
+frowning mountains. The waves swished along the smooth beach; the
+parrots screamed in the orange and ceiba-trees; the palms waved their
+limber fronds foolishly like an awkward chorus at the prima donna's
+cue to enter.
+
+Suddenly the town was full of excitement. A native boy dashed down a
+grass-grown street, shrieking: "_Busca el Senor Goodwin. Ha venido un
+telegrafo por el!_"
+
+The word passed quickly. Telegrams do not often come to anyone in
+Coralio. The cry for Senor Goodwin was taken up by a dozen officious
+voices. The main street running parallel to the beach became
+populated with those who desired to expedite the delivery of the
+despatch. Knots of women with complexions varying from palest olive
+to deepest brown gathered at street corners and plaintively carolled:
+"_Un telegrafo por Senor Goodwin!_" The _comandante_, Don Senor el
+Coronel Encarnacion Rios, who was loyal to the Ins and suspected
+Goodwin's devotion to the Outs, hissed: "Aha!" and wrote in his
+secret memorandum book the accusive fact that Senor Goodwin had on
+that momentous date received a telegram.
+
+In the midst of the hullabaloo a man stepped to the door of a small
+wooden building and looked out. Above the door was a sign that read
+"Keogh and Clancy"--a nomenclature that seemed not to be indigenous
+to that tropical soil. The man in the door was Billy Keogh, scout
+of fortune and progress and latter-day rover of the Spanish Main.
+Tintypes and photographs were the weapons with which Keogh and Clancy
+were at that time assailing the hopeless shores. Outside the shop
+were set two large frames filled with specimens of their art and
+skill.
+
+Keogh leaned in the doorway, his bold and humorous countenance
+wearing a look of interest at the unusual influx of life and sound
+into the street. When the meaning of the disturbance became clear to
+him he placed a hand beside his mouth and shouted: "Hey! Frank!" in
+such a robustious voice that the feeble clamour of the natives was
+drowned and silenced.
+
+Fifty yards away, on the seaward side of the street, stood the abode
+of the consul for the United States. Out from the door of this
+building tumbled Goodwin at the call. He had been smoking with
+Willard Geddie, the consul, on the back porch of the consulate, which
+was conceded to be the coolest spot in Coralio.
+
+"Hurry up," shouted Keogh. "There's a riot in town on account of a
+telegram that's come for you. You want to be careful about these
+things, my boy. It won't do to trifle with the feelings of the
+public this way. You'll be getting a pink note some day with violet
+scent on it; and then the country'll be steeped in the throes of a
+revolution."
+
+Goodwin had strolled up the street and met the boy with the message.
+The ox-eyed women gazed at him with shy admiration, for his type drew
+them. He was big, blonde, and jauntily dressed in white linen, with
+buckskin _zapatos_. His manner was courtly, with a sort of kindly
+truculence in it, tempered by a merciful eye. When the telegram had
+been delivered, and the bearer of it dismissed with a gratuity, the
+relieved populace returned to the contiguities of shade from which
+curiosity had drawn it--the women to their baking in the mud ovens
+under the orange-trees, or to the interminable combing of their
+long, straight hair; the men to their cigarettes and gossip in the
+cantinas.
+
+Goodwin sat on Keogh's doorstep, and read his telegram. It was from
+Bob Englehart, an American, who lived in San Mateo, the capital city
+of Anchuria, eighty miles in the interior. Englehart was a gold
+miner, an ardent revolutionist and "good people." That he was a man
+of resource and imagination was proven by the telegram he had sent.
+It had been his task to send a confidential message to his friend in
+Coralio. This could not have been accomplished in either Spanish or
+English, for the eye politic in Anchuria was an active one. The Ins
+and the Outs were perpetually on their guard. But Englehart was a
+diplomatist. There existed but one code upon which he might make
+requisition with promise of safety--the great and potent code of
+Slang. So, here is the message that slipped, unconstrued, through
+the fingers of curious officials, and came to the eye of Goodwin:
+
+
+ His Nibs skedaddled yesterday per jack-rabbit line with all
+ the coin in the kitty and the bundle of muslin he's spoony
+ about. The boodle is six figures short. Our crowd in good
+ shape, but we need the spondulicks. You collar it. The main
+ guy and the dry goods are headed for the briny. You know
+ what to do.
+
+ BOB.
+
+
+This screed, remarkable as it was, had no mystery for Goodwin. He
+was the most successful of the small advance-guard of speculative
+Americans that had invaded Anchuria, and he had not reached that
+enviable pinnacle without having well exercised the arts of foresight
+and deduction. He had taken up political intrigue as a matter of
+business. He was acute enough to wield a certain influence among
+the leading schemers, and he was prosperous enough to be able to
+purchase the respect of the petty office-holders. There was always
+a revolutionary party; and to it he had always allied himself; for
+the adherents of a new administration received the rewards of their
+labours. There was now a Liberal party seeking to overturn President
+Miraflores. If the wheel successfully revolved, Goodwin stood to
+win a concession to 30,000 manzanas of the finest coffee lands in
+the interior. Certain incidents in the recent career of President
+Miraflores had excited a shrewd suspicion in Goodwin's mind that the
+government was near a dissolution from another cause than that of a
+revolution, and now Englehart's telegram had come as a corroboration
+of his wisdom.
+
+The telegram, which had remained unintelligible to the Anchurian
+linguists who had applied to it in vain their knowledge of Spanish
+and elemental English, conveyed a stimulating piece of news to
+Goodwin's understanding. It informed him that the president of the
+republic had decamped from the capital city with the contents of the
+treasury. Furthermore, that he was accompanied in his flight by that
+winning adventuress Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer, whose troupe
+of performers had been entertained by the president at San Mateo
+during the past month on a scale less modest than that with which
+royal visitors are often content. The reference to the "jack-rabbit
+line" could mean nothing else than the mule-back system of transport
+that prevailed between Coralio and the capital. The hint that the
+"boodle" was "six figures short" made the condition of the national
+treasury lamentably clear. Also it was convincingly true that the
+ingoing party--its way now made a pacific one--would need the
+"spondulicks." Unless its pledges should be fulfilled, and the spoils
+held for the delectation of the victors, precarious indeed, would
+be the position of the new government. Therefore it was exceeding
+necessary to "collar the main guy," and recapture the sinews of war
+and government.
+
+Goodwin handed the message to Keogh.
+
+"Read that, Billy," he said. "It's from Bob Englehart. Can you manage
+the cipher?"
+
+Keogh sat in the other half of the doorway, and carefully perused the
+telegram.
+
+"'Tis not a cipher," he said, finally. "'Tis what they call
+literature, and that's a system of language put in the mouths
+of people that they've never been introduced to by writers of
+imagination. The magazines invented it, but I never knew before that
+President Norvin Green had stamped it with the seal of his approval.
+'Tis now no longer literature, but language. The dictionaries tried,
+but they couldn't make it go for anything but dialect. Sure, now that
+the Western Union indorses it, it won't be long till a race of people
+will spring up that speaks it."
+
+"You're running too much to philology, Billy," said Goodwin. "Do you
+make out the meaning of it?"
+
+"Sure," replied the philosopher of Fortune. "All languages come easy
+to the man who must know 'em. I've even failed to misunderstand an
+order to evacuate in classical Chinese when it was backed up by the
+muzzle of a breech-loader. This little literary essay I hold in my
+hands means a game of Fox-in-the-Morning. Ever play that, Frank, when
+you was a kid?"
+
+"I think so," said Goodwin, laughing. "You join hands all 'round,
+and--"
+
+"You do not," interrupted Keogh. "You've got a fine sporting game
+mixed up in your head with 'All Around the Rosebush.' The spirit of
+'Fox-in-the-Morning' is opposed to the holding of hands. I'll tell
+you how it's played. This president man and his companion in play,
+they stand up over in San Mateo, ready for the run, and shout:
+'Fox-in-the-Morning!' Me and you, standing here, we say: 'Goose and
+the Gander!' They say: 'How many miles is it to London town?' We say:
+'Only a few, if your legs are long enough. How many comes out?' They
+say: 'More than you're able to catch.' And then the game commences."
+
+"I catch the idea," said Goodwin. "It won't do to let the goose
+and gander slip through our fingers, Billy; their feathers are too
+valuable. Our crowd is prepared and able to step into the shoes of
+the government at once; but with the treasury empty we'd stay in
+power about as long as a tenderfoot would stick on an untamed bronco.
+We must play the fox on every foot of the coast to prevent their
+getting out of the country."
+
+"By the mule-back schedule," said Keogh, "it's five days down from
+San Mateo. We've got plenty of time to set our outposts. There's only
+three places on the coast where they can hope to sail from--here and
+Solitas and Alazan. They're the only points we'll have to guard. It's
+as easy as a chess problem--fox to play, and mate in three moves. Oh,
+goosey, goosey, gander, whither do you wander? By the blessing of the
+literary telegraph the boodle of this benighted fatherland shall be
+preserved to the honest political party that is seeking to overthrow
+it."
+
+The situation had been justly outlined by Keogh. The down trail
+from the capital was at all times a weary road to travel. A
+jiggety-joggety journey it was; ice-cold and hot, wet and dry. The
+trail climbed appalling mountains, wound like a rotten string about
+the brows of breathless precipices, plunged through chilling snow-fed
+streams, and wriggled like a snake through sunless forests teeming
+with menacing insect and animal life. After descending to the
+foothills it turned to a trident, the central prong ending at Alazan.
+Another branched off to Coralio; the third penetrated to Solitas.
+Between the sea and the foothills stretched the five miles breadth of
+alluvial coast. Here was the flora of the tropics in its rankest and
+most prodigal growth. Spaces here and there had been wrested from the
+jungle and planted with bananas and cane and orange groves. The rest
+was a riot of wild vegetation, the home of monkeys, tapirs, jaguars,
+alligators and prodigious reptiles and insects. Where no road was cut
+a serpent could scarcely make its way through the tangle of vines and
+creepers. Across the treacherous mangrove swamps few things without
+wings could safely pass. Therefore the fugitives could hope to reach
+the coast only by one of the routes named.
+
+"Keep the matter quiet, Billy," advised Goodwin. "We don't want
+the Ins to know that the president is in flight. I suppose Bob's
+information is something of a scoop in the capital as yet. Otherwise
+he would not have tried to make his message a confidential one; and
+besides, everybody would have heard the news. I'm going around now to
+see Dr. Zavalla, and start a man up the trail to cut the telegraph
+wire."
+
+As Goodwin rose, Keogh threw his hat upon the grass by the door and
+expelled a tremendous sigh.
+
+"What's the trouble, Billy?" asked Goodwin, pausing. "That's the
+first time I ever heard you sigh."
+
+"'Tis the last," said Keogh. "With that sorrowful puff of wind I
+resign myself to a life of praiseworthy but harassing honesty. What
+are tintypes, if you please, to the opportunities of the great
+and hilarious class of ganders and geese? Not that I would be a
+president, Frank--and the boodle he's got is too big for me to
+handle--but in some ways I feel my conscience hurting me for
+addicting myself to photographing a nation instead of running away
+with it. Frank, did you ever see the 'bundle of muslin' that His
+Excellency has wrapped up and carried off?"
+
+"Isabel Guilbert?" said Goodwin, laughing. "No, I never did. From
+what I've heard of her, though, I imagine that she wouldn't stick at
+anything to carry her point. Don't get romantic, Billy. Sometimes I
+begin to fear that there's Irish blood in your ancestry."
+
+"I never saw her either," went on Keogh; "but they say she's got all
+the ladies of mythology, sculpture, and fiction reduced to chromos.
+They say she can look at a man once, and he'll turn monkey and climb
+trees to pick cocoanuts for her. Think of that president man with
+Lord knows how many hundreds of thousands of dollars in one hand, and
+this muslin siren in the other, galloping down hill on a sympathetic
+mule amid songbirds and flowers! And here is Billy Keogh, because he
+is virtuous, condemned to the unprofitable swindle of slandering the
+faces of missing links on tin for an honest living! 'Tis an injustice
+of nature."
+
+"Cheer up," said Goodwin. "You are a pretty poor fox to be envying a
+gander. Maybe the enchanting Guilbert will take a fancy to you and
+your tintypes after we impoverish her royal escort."
+
+"She could do worse," reflected Keogh; "but she won't. 'Tis not a
+tintype gallery, but the gallery of the gods that she's fitted to
+adorn. She's a very wicked lady, and the president man is in luck.
+But I hear Clancy swearing in the back room for having to do all the
+work." And Keogh plunged for the rear of the "gallery," whistling
+gaily in a spontaneous way that belied his recent sigh over the
+questionable good luck of the flying president.
+
+Goodwin turned from the main street into a much narrower one that
+intersected it at a right angle.
+
+These side streets were covered by a growth of thick, rank grass,
+which was kept to a navigable shortness by the machetes of the
+police. Stone sidewalks, little more than a ledge in width, ran along
+the base of the mean and monotonous adobe houses. At the outskirts
+of the village these streets dwindled to nothing; and here were set
+the palm-thatched huts of the Caribs and the poorer natives, and the
+shabby cabins of negroes from Jamaica and the West India islands. A
+few structures raised their heads above the red-tiled roofs of the
+one-story houses--the bell tower of the _Calaboza_, the Hotel de los
+Estranjeros, the residence of the Vesuvius Fruit Company's agent,
+the store and residence of Bernard Brannigan, a ruined cathedral in
+which Columbus had once set foot, and, most imposing of all, the
+Casa Morena--the summer "White House" of the President of Anchuria.
+On the principal street running along the beach--the Broadway
+of Coralio--were the larger stores, the government _bodega_ and
+post-office, the _cuartel_, the rum-shops and the market place.
+
+On his way Goodwin passed the house of Bernard Brannigan. It was a
+modern wooden building, two stories in height. The ground floor was
+occupied by Brannigan's store, the upper one contained the living
+apartments. A wide cool porch ran around the house half way up its
+outer walls. A handsome, vivacious girl neatly dressed in flowing
+white leaned over the railing and smiled down upon Goodwin. She was
+no darker than many an Andalusian of high descent; and she sparkled
+and glowed like a tropical moonlight.
+
+"Good evening, Miss Paula," said Goodwin, taking off his hat, with
+his ready smile. There was little difference in his manner whether
+he addressed women or men. Everybody in Coralio liked to receive the
+salutation of the big American.
+
+"Is there any news, Mr. Goodwin? Please don't say no. Isn't it
+warm? I feel just like Mariana in her moated grange--or was it a
+range?--it's hot enough."
+
+"No, there's no news to tell, I believe," said Goodwin, with a
+mischievous look in his eye, "except that old Geddie is getting
+grumpier and crosser every day. If something doesn't happen to
+relieve his mind I'll have to quit smoking on his back porch--and
+there's no other place available that is cool enough."
+
+"He isn't grumpy," said Paula Brannigan, impulsively, "when he--"
+
+But she ceased suddenly, and drew back with a deepening colour; for
+her mother had been a _mestizo_ lady, and the Spanish blood had
+brought to Paula a certain shyness that was an adornment to the other
+half of her demonstrative nature.
+
+
+
+
+II
+
+THE LOTUS AND THE BOTTLE
+
+
+Willard Geddie, consul for the United States in Coralio, was working
+leisurely on his yearly report. Goodwin, who had strolled in as he
+did daily for a smoke on the much coveted porch, had found him so
+absorbed in his work that he departed after roundly abusing the
+consul for his lack of hospitality.
+
+"I shall complain to the civil service department," said
+Goodwin;--"or is it a department?--perhaps it's only a theory. One
+gets neither civility nor service from you. You won't talk; and
+you won't set out anything to drink. What kind of a way is that of
+representing your government?"
+
+Goodwin strolled out and across to the hotel to see if he could bully
+the quarantine doctor into a game on Coralio's solitary billiard
+table. His plans were completed for the interception of the fugitives
+from the capital; and now it was but a waiting game that he had to
+play.
+
+The consul was interested in his report. He was only twenty-four; and
+he had not been in Coralio long enough for his enthusiasm to cool in
+the heat of the tropics--a paradox that may be allowed between Cancer
+and Capricorn.
+
+So many thousand bunches of bananas, so many thousand oranges and
+cocoanuts, so many ounces of gold dust, pounds of rubber, coffee,
+indigo and sarsaparilla--actually, exports were twenty per cent.
+greater than for the previous year!
+
+A little thrill of satisfaction ran through the consul. Perhaps, he
+thought, the State Department, upon reading his introduction, would
+notice--and then he leaned back in his chair and laughed. He was
+getting as bad as the others. For the moment he had forgotten that
+Coralio was an insignificant town in an insignificant republic lying
+along the by-ways of a second-rate sea. He thought of Gregg, the
+quarantine doctor, who subscribed for the London _Lancet_, expecting
+to find it quoting his reports to the home Board of Health concerning
+the yellow fever germ. The consul knew that not one in fifty of his
+acquaintances in the States had ever heard of Coralio. He knew that
+two men, at any rate, would have to read his report--some underling
+in the State Department and a compositor in the Public Printing
+Office. Perhaps the typesticker would note the increase of commerce
+in Coralio, and speak of it, over the cheese and beer, to a friend.
+
+He had just written: "Most unaccountable is the supineness of the
+large exporters in the United States in permitting the French and
+German houses to practically control the trade interests of this
+rich and productive country"--when he heard the hoarse notes of a
+steamer's siren.
+
+Geddie laid down his pen and gathered his Panama hat and umbrella. By
+the sound he knew it to be the _Valhalla_, one of the line of fruit
+vessels plying for the Vesuvius Company. Down to _ninos_ of five
+years, everyone in Coralio could name you each incoming steamer by
+the note of her siren.
+
+The consul sauntered by a roundabout, shaded way to the beach. By
+reason of long practice he gauged his stroll so accurately that
+by the time he arrived on the sandy shore the boat of the customs
+officials was rowing back from the steamer, which had been boarded
+and inspected according to the laws of Anchuria.
+
+There is no harbour at Coralio. Vessels of the draught of the
+_Valhalla_ must ride at anchor a mile from shore. When they take on
+fruit it is conveyed on lighters and freighter sloops. At Solitas,
+where there was a fine harbour, ships of many kinds were to be seen,
+but in the roadstead off Coralio scarcely any save the fruiters
+paused. Now and then a tramp coaster, or a mysterious brig from
+Spain, or a saucy French barque would hang innocently for a few
+days in the offing. Then the custom-house crew would become doubly
+vigilant and wary. At night a sloop or two would be making strange
+trips in and out along the shore; and in the morning the stock of
+Three-Star Hennessey, wines and drygoods in Coralio would be found
+vastly increased. It has also been said that the customs officials
+jingled more silver in the pockets of their red-striped trousers, and
+that the record books showed no increase in import duties received.
+
+The customs boat and the _Valhalla_ gig reached the shore at the same
+time. When they grounded in the shallow water there was still five
+yards of rolling surf between them and dry sand. Then half-clothed
+Caribs dashed into the water, and brought in on their backs the
+_Valhalla's_ purser and the little native officials in their cotton
+undershirts, blue trousers with red stripes, and flapping straw hats.
+
+At college Geddie had been a treasure as a first-baseman. He now
+closed his umbrella, stuck it upright in the sand, and stooped,
+with his hands resting upon his knees. The purser, burlesquing
+the pitcher's contortions, hurled at the consul the heavy roll of
+newspapers, tied with a string, that the steamer always brought for
+him. Geddie leaped high and caught the roll with a sounding "thwack."
+The loungers on the beach--about a third of the population of the
+town--laughed and applauded delightedly. Every week they expected to
+see that roll of papers delivered and received in that same manner,
+and they were never disappointed. Innovations did not flourish in
+Coralio.
+
+The consul re-hoisted his umbrella and walked back to the consulate.
+
+This home of a great nation's representative was a wooden structure
+of two rooms, with a native-built gallery of poles, bamboo and
+nipa palm running on three sides of it. One room was the official
+apartment, furnished chastely with a flat-top desk, a hammock, and
+three uncomfortable cane-seated chairs. Engravings of the first and
+latest president of the country represented hung against the wall.
+The other room was the consul's living apartment.
+
+It was eleven o'clock when he returned from the beach, and therefore
+breakfast time. Chanca, the Carib woman who cooked for him, was just
+serving the meal on the side of the gallery facing the sea--a spot
+famous as the coolest in Coralio. The breakfast consisted of shark's
+fin soup, stew of land crabs, breadfruit, a boiled iguana steak,
+aguacates, a freshly cut pineapple, claret and coffee.
+
+Geddie took his seat, and unrolled with luxurious laziness his bundle
+of newspapers. Here in Coralio for two days or longer he would read
+of goings-on in the world very much as we of the world read those
+whimsical contributions to inexact science that assume to portray the
+doings of the Martians. After he had finished with the papers they
+would be sent on the rounds of the other English-speaking residents
+of the town.
+
+The paper that came first to his hand was one of those bulky
+mattresses of printed stuff upon which the readers of certain New
+York journals are supposed to take their Sabbath literary nap.
+Opening this the consul rested it upon the table, supporting its
+weight with the aid of the back of a chair. Then he partook of his
+meal deliberately, turning the leaves from time to time and glancing
+half idly at the contents.
+
+Presently he was struck by something familiar to him in a picture--a
+half-page, badly printed reproduction of a photograph of a vessel.
+Languidly interested, he leaned for a nearer scrutiny and a view of
+the florid headlines of the column next to the picture.
+
+Yes; he was not mistaken. The engraving was of the eight-hundred-ton
+yacht _Idalia_, belonging to "that prince of good fellows, Midas
+of the money market, and society's pink of perfection, J. Ward
+Tolliver."
+
+Slowly sipping his black coffee, Geddie read the column of print.
+Following a listed statement of Mr. Tolliver's real estate and bonds,
+came a description of the yacht's furnishings, and then the grain of
+news no bigger than a mustard seed. Mr. Tolliver, with a party of
+favoured guests, would sail the next day on a six weeks' cruise along
+the Central American and South American coasts and among the Bahama
+Islands. Among the guests were Mrs. Cumberland Payne and Miss Ida
+Payne, of Norfolk.
+
+The writer, with the fatuous presumption that was demanded of him
+by his readers, had concocted a romance suited to their palates.
+He bracketed the names of Miss Payne and Mr. Tolliver until he had
+well-nigh read the marriage ceremony over them. He played coyly and
+insinuatingly upon the strings of "_on dit_" and "Madame Rumour"
+and "a little bird" and "no one would be surprised," and ended with
+congratulations.
+
+Geddie, having finished his breakfast, took his papers to the edge of
+the gallery, and sat there in his favourite steamer chair with his
+feet on the bamboo railing. He lighted a cigar, and looked out upon
+the sea. He felt a glow of satisfaction at finding he was so little
+disturbed by what he had read. He told himself that he had conquered
+the distress that had sent him, a voluntary exile, to this far
+land of the lotus. He could never forget Ida, of course; but there
+was no longer any pain in thinking about her. When they had had
+that misunderstanding and quarrel he had impulsively sought this
+consulship, with the desire to retaliate upon her by detaching
+himself from her world and presence. He had succeeded thoroughly in
+that. During the twelve months of his life in Coralio no word had
+passed between them, though he had sometimes heard of her through the
+dilatory correspondence with the few friends to whom he still wrote.
+Still he could not repress a little thrill of satisfaction at knowing
+that she had not yet married Tolliver or anyone else. But evidently
+Tolliver had not yet abandoned hope.
+
+Well, it made no difference to him now. He had eaten of the lotus. He
+was happy and content in this land of perpetual afternoon. Those old
+days of life in the States seemed like an irritating dream. He hoped
+Ida would be as happy as he was. The climate as balmy as that of
+distant Avalon; the fetterless, idyllic round of enchanted days;
+the life among this indolent, romantic people--a life full of music,
+flowers, and low laughter; the influence of the imminent sea and
+mountains, and the many shapes of love and magic and beauty that
+bloomed in the white tropic nights--with all he was more than
+content. Also, there was Paula Brannigan.
+
+Geddie intended to marry Paula--if, of course, she would consent;
+but he felt rather sure that she would do that. Somehow, he kept
+postponing his proposal. Several times he had been quite near to it;
+but a mysterious something always held him back. Perhaps it was only
+the unconscious, instinctive conviction that the act would sever the
+last tie that bound him to his old world.
+
+He could be very happy with Paula. Few of the native girls could be
+compared with her. She had attended a convent school in New Orleans
+for two years; and when she chose to display her accomplishments no
+one could detect any difference between her and the girls of Norfolk
+and Manhattan. But it was delicious to see her at home dressed, as
+she sometimes was, in the native costume, with bare shoulders and
+flowing sleeves.
+
+Bernard Brannigan was the great merchant of Coralio. Besides his
+store, he maintained a train of pack mules, and carried on a lively
+trade with the interior towns and villages. He had married a native
+lady of high Castilian descent, but with a tinge of Indian brown
+showing through her olive cheek. The union of the Irish and the
+Spanish had produced, as it so often has, an offshoot of rare beauty
+and variety. They were very excellent people indeed, and the upper
+story of their house was ready to be placed at the service of Geddie
+and Paula as soon as he should make up his mind to speak about it.
+
+By the time two hours were whiled away the consul tired of reading.
+The papers lay scattered about him on the gallery. Reclining there,
+he gazed dreamily out upon an Eden. A clump of banana plants
+interposed their broad shields between him and the sun. The gentle
+slope from the consulate to the sea was covered with the dark-green
+foliage of lemon-trees and orange-trees just bursting into bloom. A
+lagoon pierced the land like a dark, jagged crystal, and above it a
+pale ceiba-tree rose almost to the clouds. The waving cocoanut palms
+on the beach flared their decorative green leaves against the slate
+of an almost quiescent sea. His senses were cognizant of brilliant
+scarlet and ochres amid the vert of the coppice, of odours of
+fruit and bloom and the smoke from Chanca's clay oven under the
+calabash-tree; of the treble laughter of the native women in their
+huts, the song of the robin, the salt taste of the breeze, the
+diminuendo of the faint surf running along the shore--and, gradually,
+of a white speck, growing to a blur, that intruded itself upon the
+drab prospect of the sea.
+
+Lazily interested, he watched this blur increase until it became
+the _Idalia_ steaming at full speed, coming down the coast. Without
+changing his position he kept his eyes upon the beautiful white yacht
+as she drew swiftly near, and came opposite to Coralio. Then, sitting
+upright, he saw her float steadily past and on. Scarcely a mile of
+sea had separated her from the shore. He had seen the frequent flash
+of her polished brass work and the stripes of her deck-awnings--so
+much, and no more. Like a ship on a magic lantern slide the _Idalia_
+had crossed the illuminated circle of the consul's little world, and
+was gone. Save for the tiny cloud of smoke that was left hanging
+over the brim of the sea, she might have been an immaterial thing, a
+chimera of his idle brain.
+
+Geddie went into his office and sat down to dawdle over his report.
+If the reading of the article in the paper had left him unshaken,
+this silent passing of the _Idalia_ had done for him still more.
+It had brought the calm and peace of a situation from which all
+uncertainty had been erased. He knew that men sometimes hope without
+being aware of it. Now, since she had come two thousand miles and had
+passed without a sign, not even his unconscious self need cling to
+the past any longer.
+
+After dinner, when the sun was low behind the mountains, Geddie
+walked on the little strip of beach under the cocoanuts. The wind was
+blowing mildly landward, and the surface of the sea was rippled by
+tiny wavelets.
+
+A miniature breaker, spreading with a soft "swish" upon the sand
+brought with it something round and shiny that rolled back again as
+the wave receded. The next influx beached it clear, and Geddie picked
+it up. The thing was a long-necked wine bottle of colourless glass.
+The cork had been driven in tightly to the level of the mouth, and
+the end covered with dark-red sealing-wax. The bottle contained only
+what seemed to be a sheet of paper, much curled from the manipulation
+it had undergone while being inserted. In the sealing-wax was the
+impression of a seal--probably of a signet-ring, bearing the initials
+of a monogram; but the impression had been hastily made, and the
+letters were past anything more certain than a shrewd conjecture. Ida
+Payne had always worn a signet-ring in preference to any other finger
+decoration. Geddie thought he could make out the familiar "I P"; and
+a queer sensation of disquietude went over him. More personal and
+intimate was this reminder of her than had been the sight of the
+vessel she was doubtless on. He walked back to his house, and set the
+bottle on his desk.
+
+Throwing off his hat and coat, and lighting a lamp--for the night had
+crowded precipitately upon the brief twilight--he began to examine
+his piece of sea salvage.
+
+By holding the bottle near the light and turning it judiciously, he
+made out that it contained a double sheet of note-paper filled with
+close writing; further, that the paper was of the same size and shade
+as that always used by Ida; and that, to the best of his belief, the
+handwriting was hers. The imperfect glass of the bottle so distorted
+the rays of light that he could read no word of the writing; but
+certain capital letters, of which he caught comprehensive glimpses,
+were Ida's, he felt sure.
+
+There was a little smile both of perplexity and amusement in Geddie's
+eyes as he set the bottle down, and laid three cigars side by side
+on his desk. He fetched his steamer chair from the gallery, and
+stretched himself comfortably. He would smoke those three cigars
+while considering the problem.
+
+For it amounted to a problem. He almost wished that he had not found
+the bottle; but the bottle was there. Why should it have drifted in
+from the sea, whence come so many disquieting things, to disturb his
+peace?
+
+In this dreamy land, where time seemed so redundant, he had fallen
+into the habit of bestowing much thought upon even trifling matters.
+
+He began to speculate upon many fanciful theories concerning the
+story of the bottle, rejecting each in turn.
+
+Ships in danger of wreck or disablement sometimes cast forth such
+precarious messengers calling for aid. But he had seen the _Idalia_
+not three hours before, safe and speeding. Suppose the crew had
+mutinied and imprisoned the passengers below, and the message was
+one begging for succour! But, premising such an improbable outrage,
+would the agitated captives have taken the pains to fill four pages
+of note-paper with carefully penned arguments to their rescue.
+
+Thus by elimination he soon rid the matter of the more unlikely
+theories, and was reduced--though aversely--to the less assailable
+one that the bottle contained a message to himself. Ida knew he was
+in Coralio; she must have launched the bottle while the yacht was
+passing and the wind blowing fairly toward the shore.
+
+As soon as Geddie reached this conclusion a wrinkle came between his
+brows and a stubborn look settled around his mouth. He sat looking
+out through the doorway at the gigantic fire-flies traversing the
+quiet streets.
+
+If this was a message to him from Ida, what could it mean save an
+overture toward a reconciliation? And if that, why had she not used
+the same methods of the post instead of this uncertain and even
+flippant means of communication? A note in an empty bottle, cast into
+the sea! There was something light and frivolous about it, if not
+actually contemptuous.
+
+The thought stirred his pride and subdued whatever emotions had been
+resurrected by the finding of the bottle.
+
+Geddie put on his coat and hat and walked out. He followed a street
+that led him along the border of the little plaza where a band was
+playing and people were rambling, care-free and indolent. Some
+timorous _senoritas_ scurrying past with fire-flies tangled in the
+jetty braids of their hair glanced at him with shy, flattering eyes.
+The air was languorous with the scent of jasmin and orange-blossoms.
+
+The consul stayed his steps at the house of Bernard Brannigan. Paula
+was swinging in a hammock on the gallery. She rose from it like a
+bird from its nest. The colour came to her cheek at the sound of
+Geddie's voice.
+
+He was charmed at the sight of her costume--a flounced muslin dress,
+with a little jacket of white flannel, all made with neatness and
+style. He suggested a stroll, and they walked out to the old Indian
+well on the hill road. They sat on the curb, and there Geddie made
+the expected but long-deferred speech. Certain though he had been
+that she would not say him nay, he was thrilled with joy at the
+completeness and sweetness of her surrender. Here was surely a heart
+made for love and steadfastness. Here was no caprice or questionings
+or captious standards of convention.
+
+When Geddie kissed Paula at her door that night he was happier than
+he had ever been before. "Here in this hollow lotus land, ever to
+live and lie reclined" seemed to him, as it has seemed to many
+mariners, the best as well as the easiest. His future would be an
+ideal one. He had attained a Paradise without a serpent. His Eve
+would be indeed a part of him, unbeguiled, and therefore more
+beguiling. He had made his decision to-night, and his heart was full
+of serene, assured content.
+
+Geddie went back to his house whistling that finest and saddest love
+song, "La Golondrina." At the door his tame monkey leaped down from
+his shelf, chattering briskly. The consul turned to his desk to get
+him some nuts he usually kept there. Reaching in the half-darkness,
+his hand struck against the bottle. He started as if he had touched
+the cold rotundity of a serpent.
+
+He had forgotten that the bottle was there.
+
+He lighted the lamp and fed the monkey. Then, very deliberately, he
+lighted a cigar, and took the bottle in his hand, and walked down the
+path to the beach.
+
+There was a moon, and the sea was glorious. The breeze had shifted,
+as it did each evening, and was now rushing steadily seaward.
+
+Stepping to the water's edge, Geddie hurled the unopened bottle far
+out into the sea. It disappeared for a moment, and then shot upward
+twice its length. Geddie stood still, watching it. The moonlight was
+so bright that he could see it bobbing up and down with the little
+waves. Slowly it receded from the shore, flashing and turning as it
+went. The wind was carrying it out to sea. Soon it became a mere
+speck, doubtfully discerned at irregular intervals; and then the
+mystery of it was swallowed up by the greater mystery of the ocean.
+Geddie stood still upon the beach, smoking and looking out upon the
+water.
+
+
+
+"Simon!--Oh, Simon!--wake up there, Simon!" bawled a sonorous voice
+at the edge of the water.
+
+Old Simon Cruz was a half-breed fisherman and smuggler who lived in a
+hut on the beach. Out of his earliest nap Simon was thus awakened.
+
+He slipped on his shoes and went outside. Just landing from one of
+the _Valhalla's_ boats was the third mate of that vessel, who was an
+acquaintance of Simon's, and three sailors from the fruiter.
+
+"Go up, Simon," called the mate, "and find Dr. Gregg or Mr. Goodwin
+or anybody that's a friend to Mr. Geddie, and bring 'em here at
+once."
+
+"Saints of the skies!" said Simon, sleepily, "nothing has happened to
+Mr. Geddie?"
+
+"He's under that tarpauling," said the mate, pointing to the boat,
+"and he's rather more than half drownded. We seen him from the
+steamer nearly a mile out from shore, swimmin' like mad after a
+bottle that was floatin' in the water, outward bound. We lowered the
+gig and started for him. He nearly had his hand on the bottle, when
+he gave out and went under. We pulled him out in time to save him,
+maybe; but the doctor is the one to decide that."
+
+"A bottle?" said the old man, rubbing his eyes. He was not yet fully
+awake. "Where is the bottle?"
+
+"Driftin' along out there some'eres," said the mate, jerking his
+thumb toward the sea. "Get on with you, Simon."
+
+
+
+
+III
+
+SMITH
+
+
+Goodwin and the ardent patriot, Zavalla, took all the precautions
+that their foresight could contrive to prevent the escape of
+President Miraflores and his companion. They sent trusted messengers
+up the coast to Solitas and Alazan to warn the local leaders of the
+flight, and to instruct them to patrol the water line and arrest
+the fugitives at all hazards should they reveal themselves in that
+territory. After this was done there remained only to cover the
+district about Coralio and await the coming of the quarry. The nets
+were well spread. The roads were so few, the opportunities for
+embarkation so limited, and the two or three probable points of exit
+so well guarded that it would be strange indeed if there should slip
+through the meshes so much of the country's dignity, romance, and
+collateral. The president would, without doubt, move as secretly
+as possible, and endeavour to board a vessel by stealth from some
+secluded point along the shore.
+
+On the fourth day after the receipt of Englehart's telegram the
+_Karlsefin_, a Norwegian steamer chartered by the New Orleans fruit
+trade, anchored off Coralio with three hoarse toots of her siren. The
+_Karlsefin_ was not one of the line operated by the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company. She was something of a dilettante, doing odd jobs for a
+company that was scarcely important enough to figure as a rival to
+the Vesuvius. The movements of the _Karlsefin_ were dependent upon
+the state of the market. Sometimes she would ply steadily between the
+Spanish Main and New Orleans in the regular transport of fruit; next
+she would be making erratic trips to Mobile or Charleston, or even
+as far north as New York, according to the distribution of the fruit
+supply.
+
+Goodwin lounged upon the beach with the usual crowd of idlers that
+had gathered to view the steamer. Now that President Miraflores might
+be expected to reach the borders of his abjured country at any time,
+the orders were to keep a strict and unrelenting watch. Every vessel
+that approached the shores might now be considered a possible means
+of escape for the fugitives; and an eye was kept even on the sloops
+and dories that belonged to the sea-going contingent of Coralio.
+Goodwin and Zavalla moved everywhere, but without ostentation,
+watching the loopholes of escape.
+
+The customs officials crowded importantly into their boat and rowed
+out to the _Karlsefin_. A boat from the steamer landed her purser
+with his papers, and took out the quarantine doctor with his green
+umbrella and clinical thermometer. Next a swarm of Caribs began to
+load upon lighters the thousands of bunches of bananas heaped upon
+the shore and row them out to the steamer. The _Karlsefin_ had
+no passenger list, and was soon done with the attention of the
+authorities. The purser declared that the steamer would remain at
+anchor until morning, taking on her fruit during the night. The
+_Karlsefin_ had come, he said, from New York, to which port her
+latest load of oranges and cocoanuts had been conveyed. Two or three
+of the freighter sloops were engaged to assist in the work, for the
+captain was anxious to make a quick return in order to reap the
+advantage offered by a certain dearth of fruit in the States.
+
+About four o'clock in the afternoon another of those marine monsters,
+not very familiar in those waters, hove in sight, following the
+fateful _Idalia_--a graceful steam yacht, painted a light buff,
+clean-cut as a steel engraving. The beautiful vessel hovered off
+shore, see-sawing the waves as lightly as a duck in a rain barrel.
+A swift boat manned by a crew in uniform came ashore, and a
+stocky-built man leaped to the sands.
+
+The new-comer seemed to turn a disapproving eye upon the rather
+motley congregation of native Anchurians, and made his way at once
+toward Goodwin, who was the most conspicuously Anglo-Saxon figure
+present. Goodwin greeted him with courtesy.
+
+Conversation developed that the newly landed one was named Smith,
+and that he had come in a yacht. A meagre biography, truly; for the
+yacht was most apparent; and the "Smith" not beyond a reasonable
+guess before the revelation. Yet to the eye of Goodwin, who had seen
+several things, there was a discrepancy between Smith and his yacht.
+A bullet-headed man Smith was, with an oblique, dead eye and the
+moustache of a cocktail-mixer. And unless he had shifted costumes
+before putting off for shore he had affronted the deck of his correct
+vessel clad in a pearl-gray derby, a gay plaid suit and vaudeville
+neckwear. Men owning pleasure yachts generally harmonize better with
+them.
+
+Smith looked business, but he was no advertiser. He commented upon
+the scenery, remarking upon its fidelity to the pictures in the
+geography; and then inquired for the United States consul. Goodwin
+pointed out the starred-and-striped bunting hanging above the little
+consulate, which was concealed behind the orange-trees.
+
+"Mr. Geddie, the consul, will be sure to be there," said Goodwin. "He
+was very nearly drowned a few days ago while taking a swim in the
+sea, and the doctor has ordered him to remain indoors for some time."
+
+Smith plowed his way through the sand to the consulate, his
+haberdashery creating violent discord against the smooth tropical
+blues and greens.
+
+Geddie was lounging in his hammock, somewhat pale of face and languid
+in pose. On that night when the _Valhalla's_ boat had brought him
+ashore apparently drenched to death by the sea, Doctor Gregg and his
+other friends had toiled for hours to preserve the little spark of
+life that remained to him. The bottle, with its impotent message, was
+gone out to sea, and the problem that it had provoked was reduced
+to a simple sum in addition--one and one make two, by the rule of
+arithmetic; one by the rule of romance.
+
+There is a quaint old theory that man may have two souls--a
+peripheral one which serves ordinarily, and a central one which is
+stirred only at certain times, but then with activity and vigour.
+While under the domination of the former a man will shave, vote, pay
+taxes, give money to his family, buy subscription books and comport
+himself on the average plan. But let the central soul suddenly become
+dominant, and he may, in the twinkling of an eye, turn upon the
+partner of his joys with furious execration; he may change his
+politics while you could snap your fingers; he may deal out deadly
+insult to his dearest friend; he may get him, instanter, to a
+monastery or a dance hall; he may elope, or hang himself--or he may
+write a song or poem, or kiss his wife unasked, or give his funds to
+the search of a microbe. Then the peripheral soul will return; and we
+have our safe, sane citizen again. It is but the revolt of the Ego
+against Order; and its effect is to shake up the atoms only that they
+may settle where they belong.
+
+Geddie's revulsion had been a mild one--no more than a swim in a
+summer sea after so inglorious an object as a drifting bottle. And
+now he was himself again. Upon his desk, ready for the post, was a
+letter to his government tendering his resignation as consul, to be
+effective as soon as another could be appointed in his place. For
+Bernard Brannigan, who never did things in a half-way manner, was to
+take Geddie at once for a partner in his very profitable and various
+enterprises; and Paula was happily engaged in plans for refurnishing
+and decorating the upper story of the Brannigan house.
+
+The consul rose from his hammock when he saw the conspicuous stranger
+in his door.
+
+"Keep your seat, old man," said the visitor, with an airy wave of his
+large hand. "My name's Smith; and I've come in a yacht. You are the
+consul--is that right? A big, cool guy on the beach directed me here.
+Thought I'd pay my respects to the flag."
+
+"Sit down," said Geddie. "I've been admiring your craft ever since it
+came in sight. Looks like a fast sailer. What's her tonnage?"
+
+"Search me!" said Smith. "I don't know what she weighs in at. But
+she's got a tidy gait. The _Rambler_--that's her name--don't take the
+dust of anything afloat. This is my first trip on her. I'm taking a
+squint along this coast just to get an idea of the countries where
+the rubber and red pepper and revolutions come from. I had no idea
+there was so much scenery down here. Why, Central Park ain't in it
+with this neck of the woods. I'm from New York. They get monkeys, and
+cocoanuts, and parrots down here--is that right?"
+
+"We have them all," said Geddie. "I'm quite sure that our fauna and
+flora would take a prize over Central Park."
+
+"Maybe they would," admitted Smith, cheerfully. "I haven't seen them
+yet. But I guess you've got us skinned on the animal and vegetation
+question. You don't have much travel here, do you?"
+
+"Travel?" queried the consul. "I suppose you mean passengers on the
+steamers. No; very few people land in Coralio. An investor now and
+then--tourists and sight-seers generally go further down the coast to
+one of the larger towns where there is a harbour."
+
+"I see a ship out there loading up with bananas," said Smith. "Any
+passengers come on her?"
+
+"That's the _Karlsefin_," said the consul. "She's a tramp
+fruiter--made her last trip to New York, I believe. No; she brought
+no passengers. I saw her boat come ashore, and there was no one.
+About the only exciting recreation we have here is watching steamers
+when they arrive; and a passenger on one of them generally causes
+the whole town to turn out. If you are going to remain in Coralio
+a while, Mr. Smith, I'll be glad to take you around to meet some
+people. There are four or five American chaps that are good to know,
+besides the native high-fliers."
+
+"Thanks," said the yachtsman, "but I wouldn't put you to the trouble.
+I'd like to meet the guys you speak of, but I won't be here long
+enough to do much knocking around. That cool gent on the beach spoke
+of a doctor; can you tell me where I could find him? The _Rambler_
+ain't quite as steady on her feet as a Broadway hotel; and a fellow
+gets a touch of seasickness now and then. Thought I'd strike the
+croaker for a handful of the little sugar pills, in case I need 'em."
+
+"You will be apt to find Dr. Gregg at the hotel," said the consul.
+"You can see it from the door--it's that two-story building with the
+balcony, where the orange-trees are."
+
+The Hotel de los Estranjeros was a dreary hostelry, in great disuse
+both by strangers and friends. It stood at a corner of the Street of
+the Holy Sepulchre. A grove of small orange-trees crowded against one
+side of it, enclosed by a low, rock wall over which a tall man might
+easily step. The house was of plastered adobe, stained a hundred
+shades of colour by the salt breeze and the sun. Upon its upper
+balcony opened a central door and two windows containing broad
+jalousies instead of sashes.
+
+The lower floor communicated by two doorways with the narrow,
+rock-paved sidewalk. The _pulperia_--or drinking shop--of the
+proprietress, Madama Timotea Ortiz, occupied the ground floor. On the
+bottles of brandy, _anisada_, Scotch "smoke" and inexpensive wines
+behind the little counter the dust lay thick save where the fingers
+of infrequent customers had left irregular prints. The upper story
+contained four or five guest-rooms which were rarely put to their
+destined use. Sometimes a fruit-grower, riding in from his plantation
+to confer with his agent, would pass a melancholy night in the dismal
+upper story; sometimes a minor native official on some trifling
+government quest would have his pomp and majesty awed by Madama's
+sepulchral hospitality. But Madama sat behind her bar content, not
+desiring to quarrel with Fate. If anyone required meat, drink or
+lodging at the Hotel de los Estranjeros they had but to come, and be
+served. _Esta bueno._ If they came not, why, then, they came not.
+_Esta bueno._
+
+As the exceptional yachtsman was making his way down the precarious
+sidewalk of the Street of the Holy Sepulchre, the solitary permanent
+guest of that decaying hotel sat at its door, enjoying the breeze
+from the sea.
+
+Dr. Gregg, the quarantine physician, was a man of fifty or sixty,
+with a florid face and the longest beard between Topeka and Terra
+del Fuego. He held his position by virtue of an appointment by the
+Board of Health of a seaport city in one of the Southern states.
+That city feared the ancient enemy of every Southern seaport--the
+yellow fever--and it was the duty of Dr. Gregg to examine crew and
+passengers of every vessel leaving Coralio for preliminary symptoms.
+The duties were light, and the salary, for one who lived in Coralio,
+ample. Surplus time there was in plenty; and the good doctor added
+to his gains by a large private practice among the residents of the
+coast. The fact that he did not know ten words of Spanish was no
+obstacle; a pulse could be felt and a fee collected without one being
+a linguist. Add to the description the facts that the doctor had
+a story to tell concerning the operation of trepanning which no
+listener had ever allowed him to conclude, and that he believed
+in brandy as a prophylactic; and the special points of interest
+possessed by Dr. Gregg will have become exhausted.
+
+The doctor had dragged a chair to the sidewalk. He was coatless, and
+he leaned back against the wall and smoked, while he stroked his
+beard. Surprise came into his pale blue eyes when he caught sight of
+Smith in his unusual and prismatic clothes.
+
+"You're Dr. Gregg--is that right?" said Smith, feeling the dog's head
+pin in his tie. "The constable--I mean the consul, told me you hung
+out at this caravansary. My name's Smith; and I came in a yacht.
+Taking a cruise around, looking at the monkeys and pineapple-trees.
+Come inside and have a drink, Doc. This cafe looks on the blink, but
+I guess it can set out something wet."
+
+"I will join you, sir, in just a taste of brandy," said Dr. Gregg,
+rising quickly. "I find that as a prophylactic a little brandy is
+almost a necessity in this climate."
+
+As they turned to enter the _pulperia_ a native man, barefoot,
+glided noiselessly up and addressed the doctor in Spanish. He was
+yellowish-brown, like an over-ripe lemon; he wore a cotton shirt and
+ragged linen trousers girded by a leather belt. His face was like an
+animal's, live and wary, but without promise of much intelligence.
+This man jabbered with animation and so much seriousness that it
+seemed a pity that his words were to be wasted.
+
+Dr. Gregg felt his pulse.
+
+"You sick?" he inquired.
+
+"_Mi mujer esta enferma en la casa_," said the man, thus endeavouring
+to convey the news, in the only language open to him, that his wife
+lay ill in her palm-thatched hut.
+
+The doctor drew a handful of capsules filled with a white powder from
+his trousers pocket. He counted out ten of them into the native's
+hand, and held up his forefinger impressively.
+
+"Take one," said the doctor, "every two hours." He then held up two
+fingers, shaking them emphatically before the native's face. Next he
+pulled out his watch and ran his finger round its dial twice. Again
+the two fingers confronted the patient's nose. "Two--two--two hours,"
+repeated the doctor.
+
+"_Si, Senor_," said the native, sadly.
+
+He pulled a cheap silver watch from his own pocket and laid it in
+the doctor's hand. "Me bring," said he, struggling painfully with
+his scant English, "other watchy to-morrow." Then he departed
+downheartedly with his capsules.
+
+"A very ignorant race of people, sir," said the doctor, as he slipped
+the watch into his pocket. "He seems to have mistaken my directions
+for taking the physic for the fee. However, it is all right. He owes
+me an account, anyway. The chances are that he won't bring the other
+watch. You can't depend on anything they promise you. About that
+drink, now? How did you come to Coralio, Mr. Smith? I was not aware
+that any boats except the _Karlsefin_ had arrived for some days."
+
+The two leaned against the deserted bar; and Madama set out a bottle
+without waiting for the doctor's order. There was no dust on it.
+
+After they had drank twice Smith said:
+
+"You say there were no passengers on the _Karlsefin_, Doc? Are you
+sure about that? It seems to me I heard somebody down on the beach
+say that there was one or two aboard."
+
+"They were mistaken, sir. I myself went out and put all hands through
+a medical examination, as usual. The _Karlsefin_ sails as soon as she
+gets her bananas loaded, which will be about daylight in the morning,
+and she got everything ready this afternoon. No, sir, there was no
+passenger list. Like that Three-Star? A French schooner landed two
+slooploads of it a month ago. If any customs duties on it went to the
+distinguished republic of Anchuria you may have my hat. If you won't
+have another, come out and let's sit in the cool a while. It isn't
+often we exiles get a chance to talk with somebody from the outside
+world."
+
+The doctor brought out another chair to the sidewalk for his new
+acquaintance. The two seated themselves.
+
+"You are a man of the world," said Dr. Gregg; "a man of travel and
+experience. Your decision in a matter of ethics and, no doubt, on
+the points of equity, ability and professional probity should be of
+value. I would be glad if you will listen to the history of a case
+that I think stands unique in medical annals.
+
+"About nine years ago, while I was engaged in the practice of
+medicine in my native city, I was called to treat a case of contusion
+of the skull. I made the diagnosis that a splinter of bone was
+pressing upon the brain, and that the surgical operation known as
+trepanning was required. However, as the patient was a gentleman of
+wealth and position, I called in for consultation Dr.--"
+
+Smith rose from his chair, and laid a hand, soft with apology, upon
+the doctor's shirt sleeve.
+
+"Say, Doc," he said, solemnly, "I want to hear that story. You've got
+me interested; and I don't want to miss the rest of it. I know it's a
+loola by the way it begins; and I want to tell it at the next meeting
+of the Barney O'Flynn Association, if you don't mind. But I've got
+one or two matters to attend to first. If I get 'em attended to
+in time I'll come right back and hear you spiel the rest before
+bedtime--is that right?"
+
+"By all means," said the doctor, "get your business attended to,
+and then return. I shall wait up for you. You see, one of the most
+prominent physicians at the consultation diagnosed the trouble as a
+blood clot; another said it was an abscess, but I--"
+
+"Don't tell me now, Doc. Don't spoil the story. Wait till I come
+back. I want to hear it as it runs off the reel--is that right?"
+
+The mountains reached up their bulky shoulders to receive the level
+gallop of Apollo's homing steeds, the day died in the lagoons and
+in the shadowed banana groves and in the mangrove swamps, where the
+great blue crabs were beginning to crawl to land for their nightly
+ramble. And it died, at last, upon the highest peaks. Then the brief
+twilight, ephemeral as the flight of a moth, came and went; the
+Southern Cross peeped with its topmost eye above a row of palms,
+and the fire-flies heralded with their torches the approach of
+soft-footed night.
+
+In the offing the _Karlsefin_ swayed at anchor, her lights seeming
+to penetrate the water to countless fathoms with their shimmering,
+lanceolate reflections. The Caribs were busy loading her by means of
+the great lighters heaped full from the piles of fruit ranged upon
+the shore.
+
+On the sandy beach, with his back against a cocoanut-tree and the
+stubs of many cigars lying around him, Smith sat waiting, never
+relaxing his sharp gaze in the direction of the steamer.
+
+The incongruous yachtsman had concentrated his interest upon the
+innocent fruiter. Twice had he been assured that no passengers had
+come to Coralio on board of her. And yet, with a persistence not to
+be attributed to an idling voyager, he had appealed the case to the
+higher court of his own eyesight. Surprisingly like some gay-coated
+lizard, he crouched at the foot of the cocoanut palm, and with the
+beady, shifting eyes of the selfsame reptile, sustained his espionage
+on the _Karlsefin_.
+
+On the white sands a whiter gig belonging to the yacht was drawn up,
+guarded by one of the white-ducked crew. Not far away in a _pulperia_
+on the shore-following Calle Grande three other sailors swaggered
+with their cues around Coralio's solitary billiard-table. The boat
+lay there as if under orders to be ready for use at any moment. There
+was in the atmosphere a hint of expectation, of waiting for something
+to occur, which was foreign to the air of Coralio.
+
+Like some passing bird of brilliant plumage, Smith alights on this
+palmy shore but to preen his wings for an instant and then to fly
+away upon silent pinions. When morning dawned there was no Smith, no
+waiting gig, no yacht in the offing. Smith left no intimation of his
+mission there, no footprints to show where he had followed the trail
+of his mystery on the sands of Coralio that night. He came; he spake
+his strange jargon of the asphalt and the cafes; he sat under the
+cocoanut-tree, and vanished. The next morning Coralio, Smithless,
+ate its fried plantain and said: "The man of pictured clothing went
+himself away." With the _siesta_ the incident passed, yawning, into
+history.
+
+So, for a time, must Smith pass behind the scenes of the play. He
+comes no more to Coralio nor to Doctor Gregg, who sits in vain,
+wagging his redundant beard, waiting to enrich his derelict audience
+with his moving tale of trepanning and jealousy.
+
+But prosperously to the lucidity of these loose pages, Smith shall
+flutter among them again. In the nick of time he shall come to tell
+us why he strewed so many anxious cigar stumps around the cocoanut
+palm that night. This he must do; for, when he sailed away before
+the dawn in his yacht _Rambler_, he carried with him the answer to a
+riddle so big and preposterous that few in Anchuria had ventured even
+to propound it.
+
+
+
+
+IV
+
+CAUGHT
+
+
+The plans for the detention of the flying President Miraflores
+and his companion at the coast line seemed hardly likely to fail.
+Dr. Zavalla himself had gone to the port of Alazan to establish a
+guard at that point. At Solitas the Liberal patriot Varras could be
+depended upon to keep close watch. Goodwin held himself responsible
+for the district about Coralio.
+
+The news of the president's flight had been disclosed to no one in
+the coast towns save trusted members of the ambitious political party
+that was desirous of succeeding to power. The telegraph wire running
+from San Mateo to the coast had been cut far up on the mountain trail
+by an emissary of Zavalla's. Long before this could be repaired and
+word received along it from the capital the fugitives would have
+reached the coast and the question of escape or capture been solved.
+
+Goodwin had stationed armed sentinels at frequent intervals along the
+shore for a mile in each direction from Coralio. They were instructed
+to keep a vigilant lookout during the night to prevent Miraflores
+from attempting to embark stealthily by means of some boat or sloop
+found by chance at the water's edge. A dozen patrols walked the
+streets of Coralio unsuspected, ready to intercept the truant
+official should he show himself there.
+
+Goodwin was very well convinced that no precautions had been
+overlooked. He strolled about the streets that bore such
+high-sounding names and were but narrow, grass-covered lanes, lending
+his own aid to the vigil that had been intrusted to him by Bob
+Englehart.
+
+The town had begun the tepid round of its nightly diversions. A few
+leisurely dandies, clad in white duck, with flowing neckties, and
+swinging slim bamboo canes, threaded the grassy by-ways toward the
+houses of their favoured senoritas. Those who wooed the art of music
+dragged tirelessly at whining concertinas, or fingered lugubrious
+guitars at doors and windows. An occasional soldier from the
+_cuartel_, with flapping straw hat, without coat or shoes, hurried
+by, balancing his long gun like a lance in one hand. From every
+density of the foliage the giant tree frogs sounded their loud and
+irritating clatter. Further out, where the by-ways perished at the
+brink of the jungle, the guttural cries of marauding baboons and the
+coughing of the alligators in the black estuaries fractured the vain
+silence of the wood.
+
+By ten o'clock the streets were deserted. The oil lamps that had
+burned, a sickly yellow, at random corners, had been extinguished
+by some economical civic agent. Coralio lay sleeping calmly between
+toppling mountains and encroaching sea like a stolen babe in the arms
+of its abductors. Somewhere over in that tropical darkness--perhaps
+already threading the profundities of the alluvial lowlands--the high
+adventurer and his mate were moving toward land's end. The game of
+Fox-in-the-Morning should be coming soon to its close.
+
+Goodwin, at his deliberate gait, passed the long, low _cuartel_ where
+Coralio's contingent of Anchuria's military force slumbered, with its
+bare toes pointed heavenward. There was a law that no civilian might
+come so near the headquarters of that citadel of war after nine
+o'clock, but Goodwin was always forgetting the minor statutes.
+
+"_Quien vive?_" shrieked the sentinel, wrestling prodigiously with
+his lengthy musket.
+
+"_Americano_," growled Goodwin, without turning his head, and passed
+on, unhalted.
+
+To the right he turned, and to the left up the street that ultimately
+reached the Plaza Nacional. When within the toss of a cigar stump
+from the intersecting Street of the Holy Sepulchre, he stopped
+suddenly in the pathway.
+
+He saw the form of a tall man, clothed in black and carrying a large
+valise, hurry down the cross-street in the direction of the beach.
+And Goodwin's second glance made him aware of a woman at the man's
+elbow on the farther side, who seemed to urge forward, if not even to
+assist, her companion in their swift but silent progress. They were
+no Coralians, those two.
+
+Goodwin followed at increased speed, but without any of the artful
+tactics that are so dear to the heart of the sleuth. The American was
+too broad to feel the instinct of the detective. He stood as an agent
+for the people of Anchuria, and but for political reasons he would
+have demanded then and there the money. It was the design of his
+party to secure the imperilled fund, to restore it to the treasury
+of the country, and to declare itself in power without bloodshed or
+resistance.
+
+The couple halted at the door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros, and
+the man struck upon the wood with the impatience of one unused to his
+entry being stayed. Madama was long in response; but after a time her
+light showed, the door was opened, and the guests housed.
+
+Goodwin stood in the quiet street, lighting another cigar. In
+two minutes a faint gleam began to show between the slats of the
+jalousies in the upper story of the hotel. "They have engaged rooms,"
+said Goodwin to himself. "So, then, their arrangements for sailing
+have yet to be made."
+
+At that moment there came along one Esteban Delgado, a barber, an
+enemy to existing government, a jovial plotter against stagnation
+in any form. This barber was one of Coralio's saddest dogs, often
+remaining out of doors as late as eleven, post meridian. He was a
+partisan Liberal; and he greeted Goodwin with flatulent importance as
+a brother in the cause. But he had something important to tell.
+
+"What think you, Don Frank!" he cried, in the universal tone of the
+conspirator. "I have to-night shaved _la barba_--what you call the
+'weeskers' of the _Presidente_ himself, of this countree! Consider!
+He sent for me to come. In the poor _casita_ of an old woman he
+awaited me--in a verree leetle house in a dark place. _Carramba!_--el
+Senor Presidente to make himself thus secret and obscured! I think he
+desired not to be known--but, _carajo!_ can you shave a man and not
+see his face? This gold piece he gave me, and said it was to be all
+quite still. I think, Don Frank, there is what you call a chip over
+the bug."
+
+"Have you ever seen President Miraflores before?" asked Goodwin.
+
+"But once," answered Esteban. "He is tall; and he had weeskers,
+verree black and sufficient."
+
+"Was anyone else present when you shaved him?"
+
+"An old Indian woman, Senor, that belonged with the _casa_, and one
+senorita--a ladee of so much beautee!--_ah, Dios!_"
+
+"All right, Esteban," said Goodwin. "It's very lucky that
+you happened along with your tonsorial information. The new
+administration will be likely to remember you for this."
+
+Then in a few words he made the barber acquainted with the crisis
+into which the affairs of the nation had culminated, and instructed
+him to remain outside, keeping watch upon the two sides of the hotel
+that looked upon the street, and observing whether anyone should
+attempt to leave the house by any door or window. Goodwin himself
+went to the door through which the guests had entered, opened it and
+stepped inside.
+
+Madama had returned downstairs from her journey above to see after
+the comfort of her lodgers. Her candle stood upon the bar. She was
+about to take a thimbleful of rum as a solace for having her rest
+disturbed. She looked up without surprise or alarm as her third
+caller entered.
+
+"Ah! it is the Senor Goodwin. Not often does he honour my poor house
+by his presence."
+
+"I must come oftener," said Goodwin, with the Goodwin smile. "I hear
+that your cognac is the best between Belize to the north and Rio to
+the south. Set out the bottle, Madama, and let us have the proof in
+_un vasito_ for each of us."
+
+"My _aguardiente_," said Madama, with pride, "is the best. It grows,
+in beautiful bottles, in the dark places among the banana-trees. _Si,
+Senor._ Only at midnight can they be picked by sailor-men who bring
+them, before daylight comes, to your back door. Good _aguardiente_ is
+a verree difficult fruit to handle, Senor Goodwin."
+
+Smuggling, in Coralio, was much nearer than competition to being the
+life of trade. One spoke of it slyly, yet with a certain conceit,
+when it had been well accomplished.
+
+"You have guests in the house to-night," said Goodwin, laying a
+silver dollar upon the counter.
+
+"Why not?" said Madama, counting the change. "Two; but the smallest
+while finished to arrive. One senor, not quite old, and one senorita
+of sufficient handsomeness. To their rooms they have ascended, not
+desiring the to-eat nor the to-drink. Two rooms--_Numero_ 9 and
+_Numero_ 10."
+
+"I was expecting that gentleman and that lady," said Goodwin. "I have
+important _negocios_ that must be transacted. Will you allow me to
+see them?"
+
+"Why not?" sighed Madama, placidly. "Why should not Senor Goodwin
+ascend and speak to his friends? _Esta bueno._ Room _Numero_ 9 and
+room _Numero_ 10."
+
+Goodwin loosened in his coat pocket the American revolver that he
+carried, and ascended the steep, dark stairway.
+
+In the hallway above, the saffron light from a hanging lamp allowed
+him to select the gaudy numbers on the doors. He turned the knob of
+Number 9, entered and closed the door behind him.
+
+If that was Isabel Guilbert seated by the table in that poorly
+furnished room, report had failed to do her charms justice. She
+rested her head upon one hand. Extreme fatigue was signified in every
+line of her figure; and upon her countenance a deep perplexity was
+written. Her eyes were gray-irised, and of that mould that seems to
+have belonged to the orbs of all the famous queens of hearts. Their
+whites were singularly clear and brilliant, concealed above the
+irises by heavy horizontal lids, and showing a snowy line below them.
+Such eyes denote great nobility, vigour, and, if you can conceive of
+it, a most generous selfishness. She looked up when the American
+entered with an expression of surprised inquiry, but without alarm.
+
+Goodwin took off his hat and seated himself, with his characteristic
+deliberate ease, upon a corner of the table. He held a lighted cigar
+between his fingers. He took this familiar course because he was sure
+that preliminaries would be wasted upon Miss Guilbert. He knew her
+history, and the small part that the conventions had played in it.
+
+"Good evening," he said. "Now, madame, let us come to business at
+once. You will observe that I mention no names, but I know who is in
+the next room, and what he carries in that valise. That is the point
+which brings me here. I have come to dictate terms of surrender."
+
+The lady neither moved nor replied, but steadily regarded the cigar
+in Goodwin's hand.
+
+"We," continued the dictator, thoughtfully regarding the neat
+buckskin shoe on his gently swinging foot--"I speak for a
+considerable majority of the people--demand the return of the stolen
+funds belonging to them. Our terms go very little further than that.
+They are very simple. As an accredited spokesman, I promise that our
+interference will cease if they are accepted. Give up the money, and
+you and your companion will be permitted to proceed wherever you
+will. In fact, assistance will be given you in the matter of securing
+a passage by any outgoing vessel you may choose. It is on my personal
+responsibility that I add congratulations to the gentleman in Number
+10 upon his taste in feminine charms."
+
+Returning his cigar to his mouth, Goodwin observed her, and saw that
+her eyes followed it and rested upon it with icy and significant
+concentration. Apparently she had not heard a word he had said. He
+understood, tossed the cigar out the window, and, with an amused
+laugh, slid from the table to his feet.
+
+"That is better," said the lady. "It makes it possible for me to
+listen to you. For a second lesson in good manners, you might now
+tell me by whom I am being insulted."
+
+"I am sorry," said Goodwin, leaning one hand on the table, "that my
+time is too brief for devoting much of it to a course of etiquette.
+Come, now; I appeal to your good sense. You have shown yourself,
+in more than one instance, to be well aware of what is to your
+advantage. This is an occasion that demands the exercise of your
+undoubted intelligence. There is no mystery here. I am Frank Goodwin;
+and I have come for the money. I entered this room at a venture. Had
+I entered the other I would have had it before now. Do you want it in
+words? The gentleman in Number 10 has betrayed a great trust. He has
+robbed his people of a large sum, and it is I who will prevent their
+losing it. I do not say who that gentleman is; but if I should be
+forced to see him and he should prove to be a certain high official
+of the republic, it will be my duty to arrest him. The house is
+guarded. I am offering you liberal terms. It is not absolutely
+necessary that I confer personally with the gentleman in the next
+room. Bring me the valise containing the money, and we will call the
+affair ended."
+
+The lady arose from her chair and stood for a moment, thinking
+deeply.
+
+"Do you live here, Mr. Goodwin?" she asked, presently.
+
+"Yes."
+
+"What is your authority for this intrusion?"
+
+"I am an instrument of the republic. I was advised by wire of the
+movements of the--gentleman in Number 10."
+
+"May I ask you two or three questions? I believe you to be a man more
+apt to be truthful than--timid. What sort of a town is this--Coralio,
+I think they call it?"
+
+"Not much of a town," said Goodwin, smiling. "A banana town, as they
+run. Grass huts, 'dobes, five or six two-story houses, accommodations
+limited, population half-breed Spanish and Indian, Caribs and
+blackamoors. No sidewalks to speak of, no amusements. Rather unmoral.
+That's an offhand sketch, of course."
+
+"Are there any inducements, say in a social or in a business way, for
+people to reside here?"
+
+"Oh, yes," answered Goodwin, smiling broadly. "There are no afternoon
+teas, no hand-organs, no department stores--and there is no
+extradition treaty."
+
+"He told me," went on the lady, speaking as if to herself, and with
+a slight frown, "that there were towns on this coast of beauty and
+importance; that there was a pleasing social order--especially an
+American colony of cultured residents."
+
+"There is an American colony," said Goodwin, gazing at her in some
+wonder. "Some of the members are all right. Some are fugitives
+from justice from the States. I recall two exiled bank presidents,
+one army paymaster under a cloud, a couple of manslayers, and a
+widow--arsenic, I believe, was the suspicion in her case. I myself
+complete the colony, but, as yet, I have not distinguished myself by
+any particular crime."
+
+"Do not lose hope," said the lady, dryly; "I see nothing in your
+actions to-night to guarantee you further obscurity. Some mistake
+has been made; I do not know just where. But _him_ you shall not
+disturb to-night. The journey has fatigued him so that he has fallen
+asleep, I think, in his clothes. You talk of stolen money! I do not
+understand you. Some mistake has been made. I will convince you.
+Remain where you are and I will bring you the valise that you seem to
+covet so, and show it to you."
+
+She moved toward the closed door that connected the two rooms, but
+stopped, and half turned and bestowed upon Goodwin a grave, searching
+look that ended in a quizzical smile.
+
+"You force my door," she said, "and you follow your ruffianly
+behaviour with the basest accusations; and yet"--she hesitated, as if
+to reconsider what she was about to say--"and yet--it is a puzzling
+thing--I am sure there has been some mistake."
+
+She took a step toward the door, but Goodwin stayed her by a light
+touch upon her arm. I have said before that women turned to look at
+him in the streets. He was the viking sort of man, big, good-looking,
+and with an air of kindly truculence. She was dark and proud, glowing
+or pale as her mood moved her. I do not know if Eve were light or
+dark, but if such a woman had stood in the garden I know that the
+apple would have been eaten. This woman was to be Goodwin's fate,
+and he did not know it; but he must have felt the first throes of
+destiny, for, as he faced her, the knowledge of what report named her
+turned bitter in his throat.
+
+"If there has been any mistake," he said, hotly, "it was yours. I do
+not blame the man who has lost his country, his honour, and is about
+to lose the poor consolation of his stolen riches as much as I blame
+you, for, by Heaven! I can very well see how he was brought to it.
+I can understand, and pity him. It is such women as you that strew
+this degraded coast with wretched exiles, that make men forget their
+trusts, that drag--"
+
+The lady interrupted him with a weary gesture.
+
+"There is no need to continue your insults," she said, coldly.
+"I do not understand what you are saying, nor do I know what mad
+blunder you are making; but if the inspection of the contents of
+a gentleman's portmanteau will rid me of you, let us delay it no
+longer."
+
+She passed quickly and noiselessly into the other room, and returned
+with the heavy leather valise, which she handed to the American with
+an air of patient contempt.
+
+Goodwin set the valise quickly upon the table and began to unfasten
+the straps. The lady stood by, with an expression of infinite scorn
+and weariness upon her face.
+
+The valise opened wide to a powerful, sidelong wrench. Goodwin
+dragged out two or three articles of clothing, exposing the bulk of
+its contents--package after package of tightly packed United States
+bank and treasury notes of large denomination. Reckoning from the
+high figures written upon the paper bands that bound them, the total
+must have come closely upon the hundred thousand mark.
+
+Goodwin glanced swiftly at the woman, and saw, with surprise and a
+thrill of pleasure that he wondered at, that she had experienced
+an unmistakable shock. Her eyes grew wide, she gasped, and leaned
+heavily against the table. She had been ignorant, then, he inferred,
+that her companion had looted the government treasury. But why, he
+angrily asked himself, should he be so well pleased to think this
+wandering and unscrupulous singer not so black as report had painted
+her?
+
+A noise in the other room startled them both. The door swung open,
+and a tall, elderly, dark complexioned man, recently shaven, hurried
+into the room.
+
+All the pictures of President Miraflores represent him as the
+possessor of a luxuriant supply of dark and carefully tended
+whiskers; but the story of the barber, Esteban, had prepared Goodwin
+for the change.
+
+The man stumbled in from the dark room, his eyes blinking at the
+lamplight, and heavy from sleep.
+
+"What does this mean?" he demanded in excellent English, with a keen
+and perturbed look at the American--"robbery?"
+
+"Very near it," answered Goodwin. "But I rather think I'm in time to
+prevent it. I represent the people to whom this money belongs, and
+I have come to convey it back to them." He thrust his hand into a
+pocket of his loose, linen coat.
+
+The other man's hand went quickly behind him.
+
+"Don't draw," called Goodwin, sharply; "I've got you covered from my
+pocket."
+
+The lady stepped forward, and laid one hand upon the shoulder of
+her hesitating companion. She pointed to the table. "Tell me the
+truth--the truth," she said, in a low voice. "Whose money is that?"
+
+The man did not answer. He gave a deep, long-drawn sigh, leaned and
+kissed her on the forehead, stepped back into the other room and
+closed the door.
+
+Goodwin foresaw his purpose, and jumped for the door, but the report
+of the pistol echoed as his hand touched the knob. A heavy fall
+followed, and some one swept him aside and struggled into the room of
+the fallen man.
+
+A desolation, thought Goodwin, greater than that derived from
+the loss of cavalier and gold must have been in the heart of the
+enchantress to have wrung from her, in that moment, the cry of one
+turning to the all-forgiving, all-comforting earthly consoler--to
+have made her call out from that bloody and dishonoured room--"Oh,
+mother, mother, mother!"
+
+But there was an alarm outside. The barber, Esteban, at the sound
+of the shot, had raised his voice; and the shot itself had aroused
+half the town. A pattering of feet came up the street, and official
+orders rang out on the still air. Goodwin had a duty to perform.
+Circumstances had made him the custodian of his adopted country's
+treasure. Swiftly cramming the money into the valise, he closed it,
+leaned far out of the window and dropped it into a thick orange-tree
+in the little inclosure below.
+
+
+
+They will tell you in Coralio, as they delight in telling the
+stranger, of the conclusion of that tragic flight. They will tell
+you how the upholders of the law came apace when the alarm was
+sounded--the _Comandante_ in red slippers and a jacket like a head
+waiter's and girded sword, the soldiers with their interminable guns,
+followed by outnumbering officers struggling into their gold lace and
+epaulettes; the barefooted policemen (the only capables in the lot),
+and ruffled citizens of every hue and description.
+
+They say that the countenance of the dead man was marred sadly by the
+effects of the shot; but he was identified as the fallen president
+by both Goodwin and the barber Esteban. On the next morning messages
+began to come over the mended telegraph wire; and the story of the
+flight from the capital was given out to the public. In San Mateo the
+revolutionary party had seized the sceptre of government, without
+opposition, and the _vivas_ of the mercurial populace quickly effaced
+the interest belonging to the unfortunate Miraflores.
+
+They will relate to you how the new government sifted the towns and
+raked the roads to find the valise containing Anchuria's surplus
+capital, which the president was known to have carried with him, but
+all in vain. In Coralio Senor Goodwin himself led the searching party
+which combed that town as carefully as a woman combs her hair; but
+the money was not found.
+
+So they buried the dead man, without honours, back of the town near
+the little bridge that spans the mangrove swamp; and for a _real_ a
+boy will show you his grave. They say that the old woman in whose hut
+the barber shaved the president placed the wooden slab at his head,
+and burned the inscription upon it with a hot iron.
+
+You will hear also that Senor Goodwin, like a tower of strength,
+shielded Dona Isabel Guilbert through those subsequent distressful
+days; and that his scruples as to her past career (if he had any)
+vanished; and her adventuresome waywardness (if she had any) left
+her, and they were wedded and were happy.
+
+The American built a home on a little foothill near the town. It is a
+conglomerate structure of native woods that, exported, would be worth
+a fortune, and of brick, palm, glass, bamboo and adobe. There is a
+paradise of nature about it; and something of the same sort within.
+The natives speak of its interior with hands uplifted in admiration.
+There are floors polished like mirrors and covered with hand-woven
+Indian rugs of silk fibre, tall ornaments and pictures, musical
+instruments and papered walls--"figure-it-to-yourself!" they exclaim.
+
+But they cannot tell you in Coralio (as you shall learn) what became
+of the money that Frank Goodwin dropped into the orange-tree. But
+that shall come later; for the palms are fluttering in the breeze,
+bidding us to sport and gaiety.
+
+
+
+
+V
+
+CUPID'S EXILE NUMBER TWO
+
+
+The United States of America, after looking over its stock of
+consular timber, selected Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood, of
+Dalesburg, Alabama, for a successor to Willard Geddie, resigned.
+
+Without prejudice to Mr. Atwood, it will have to be acknowledged
+that, in this instance, it was the man who sought the office. As with
+the self-banished Geddie, it was nothing less than the artful smiles
+of lovely woman that had driven Johnny Atwood to the desperate
+expedient of accepting office under a despised Federal Government so
+that he might go far, far away and never see again the false, fair
+face that had wrecked his young life. The consulship at Coralio
+seemed to offer a retreat sufficiently removed and romantic enough
+to inject the necessary drama into the pastoral scenes of Dalesburg
+life.
+
+It was while playing the part of Cupid's exile that Johnny added his
+handiwork to the long list of casualties along the Spanish Main by
+his famous manipulation of the shoe market, and his unparalleled feat
+of elevating the most despised and useless weed in his own country
+from obscurity to be a valuable product in international commerce.
+
+The trouble began, as trouble often begins instead of ending, with a
+romance. In Dalesburg there was a man named Elijah Hemstetter, who
+kept a general store. His family consisted of one daughter called
+Rosine, a name that atoned much for "Hemstetter." This young woman
+was possessed of plentiful attractions, so that the young men of the
+community were agitated in their bosoms. Among the more agitated
+was Johnny, the son of Judge Atwood, who lived in the big colonial
+mansion on the edge of Dalesburg.
+
+It would seem that the desirable Rosine should have been pleased to
+return the affection of an Atwood, a name honoured all over the state
+long before and since the war. It does seem that she should have
+gladly consented to have been led into that stately but rather empty
+colonial mansion. But not so. There was a cloud on the horizon, a
+threatening, cumulus cloud, in the shape of a lively and shrewd young
+farmer in the neighbourhood who dared to enter the lists as a rival
+to the high-born Atwood.
+
+One night Johnny propounded to Rosine a question that is considered
+of much importance by the young of the human species. The accessories
+were all there--moonlight, oleanders, magnolias, the mock-bird's
+song. Whether or no the shadow of Pinkney Dawson, the prosperous
+young farmer, came between them on that occasion is not known; but
+Rosine's answer was unfavourable. Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood
+bowed till his hat touched the lawn grass, and went away with his
+head high, but with a sore wound in his pedigree and heart. A
+Hemstetter refuse an Atwood! Zounds!
+
+Among other accidents of that year was a Democratic president. Judge
+Atwood was a warhorse of Democracy. Johnny persuaded him to set the
+wheels moving for some foreign appointment. He would go away--away.
+Perhaps in years to come Rosine would think how true, how faithful
+his love had been, and would drop a tear--maybe in the cream she
+would be skimming for Pink Dawson's breakfast.
+
+The wheels of politics revolved; and Johnny was appointed consul to
+Coralio. Just before leaving he dropped in at Hemstetter's to say
+good-bye. There was a queer, pinkish look about Rosine's eyes; and
+had the two been alone, the United States might have had to cast
+about for another consul. But Pink Dawson was there, of course,
+talking about his 400-acre orchard, and the three-mile alfalfa tract,
+and the 200-acre pasture. So Johnny shook hands with Rosine as coolly
+as if he were only going to run up to Montgomery for a couple of
+days. They had the royal manner when they chose, those Atwoods.
+
+"If you happen to strike anything in the way of a good investment
+down there, Johnny," said Pink Dawson, "just let me know, will you? I
+reckon I could lay my hands on a few extra thousands 'most any time
+for a profitable deal."
+
+"Certainly, Pink," said Johnny, pleasantly. "If I strike anything of
+the sort I'll let you in with pleasure."
+
+So Johnny went down to Mobile and took a fruit steamer for the coast
+of Anchuria.
+
+When the new consul arrived in Coralio the strangeness of the scenes
+diverted him much. He was only twenty-two; and the grief of youth is
+not worn like a garment as it is by older men. It has its seasons
+when it reigns; and then it is unseated for a time by the assertion
+of the keen senses.
+
+Billy Keogh and Johnny seemed to conceive a mutual friendship at
+once. Keogh took the new consul about town and presented him to the
+handful of Americans and the smaller number of French and Germans
+who made up the "foreign" contingent. And then, of course, he had to
+be more formally introduced to the native officials, and have his
+credentials transmitted through an interpreter.
+
+There was something about the young Southerner that the sophisticated
+Keogh liked. His manner was simple almost to boyishness; but he
+possessed the cool carelessness of a man of far greater age and
+experience. Neither uniforms nor titles, red tape nor foreign
+languages, mountains nor sea weighed upon his spirits. He was heir
+to all the ages, an Atwood, of Dalesburg; and you might know every
+thought conceived in his bosom.
+
+Geddie came down to the consulate to explain the duties and workings
+of the office. He and Keogh tried to interest the new consul in their
+description of the work that his government expected him to perform.
+
+"It's all right," said Johnny from the hammock that he had set up as
+the official reclining place. "If anything turns up that has to be
+done I'll let you fellows do it. You can't expect a Democrat to work
+during his first term of holding office."
+
+"You might look over these headings," suggested Geddie, "of the
+different lines of exports you will have to keep account of. The
+fruit is classified; and there are the valuable woods, coffee,
+rubber--"
+
+"That last account sounds all right," interrupted Mr. Atwood. "Sounds
+as if it could be stretched. I want to buy a new flag, a monkey, a
+guitar and a barrel of pineapples. Will that rubber account stretch
+over 'em?"
+
+"That's merely statistics," said Geddie, smiling. "The expense
+account is what you want. It is supposed to have a slight elasticity.
+The 'stationery' items are sometimes carelessly audited by the State
+Department."
+
+"We're wasting our time," said Keogh. "This man was born to hold
+office. He penetrates to the root of the art at one step of his eagle
+eye. The true genius of government shows its hand in every word of
+his speech."
+
+"I didn't take this job with any intention of working," explained
+Johnny, lazily. "I wanted to go somewhere in the world where they
+didn't talk about farms. There are none here, are there?"
+
+"Not the kind you are acquainted with," answered the ex-consul.
+"There is no such art here as agriculture. There never was a plow or
+a reaper within the boundaries of Anchuria."
+
+"This is the country for me," murmured the consul, and immediately he
+fell asleep.
+
+The cheerful tintypist pursued his intimacy with Johnny in spite
+of open charges that he did so to obtain a preemption on a seat in
+that coveted spot, the rear gallery of the consulate. But whether
+his designs were selfish or purely friendly, Keogh achieved that
+desirable privilege. Few were the nights on which the two could not
+be found reposing there in the sea breeze, with their heels on the
+railing, and the cigars and brandy conveniently near.
+
+One evening they sat thus, mainly silent, for their talk had dwindled
+before the stilling influence of an unusual night.
+
+There was a great, full moon; and the sea was mother-of-pearl. Almost
+every sound was hushed, for the air was but faintly stirring; and
+the town lay panting, waiting for the night to cool. Offshore lay
+the fruit steamer _Andador_, of the Vesuvius line, full-laden and
+scheduled to sail at six in the morning. There were no loiterers on
+the beach. So bright was the moonlight that the two men could see the
+small pebbles shining on the beach where the gentle surf wetted them.
+
+Then down the coast, tacking close to shore, slowly swam a little
+sloop, white-winged like some snowy sea fowl. Its course lay within
+twenty points of the wind's eye; so it veered in and out again in
+long, slow strokes like the movements of a graceful skater.
+
+Again the tactics of its crew brought it close in shore, this time
+nearly opposite the consulate; and then there blew from the sloop
+clear and surprising notes as if from a horn of elfland. A fairy
+bugle it might have been, sweet and silvery and unexpected, playing
+with spirit the familiar air of "Home, Sweet Home."
+
+It was a scene set for the land of the lotus. The authority of the
+sea and the tropics, the mystery that attends unknown sails, and the
+prestige of drifting music on moonlit waters gave it an anodynous
+charm. Johnny Atwood felt it, and thought of Dalesburg; but as soon
+as Keogh's mind had arrived at a theory concerning the peripatetic
+solo he sprang to the railing, and his ear-rending yawp fractured the
+silence of Coralio like a cannon shot.
+
+"Mel-lin-ger a-hoy!"
+
+The sloop was now on its outward tack; but from it came a clear,
+answering hail:
+
+"Good-bye, Billy . . . go-ing home--bye!"
+
+The _Andador_ was the sloop's destination. No doubt some passenger
+with a sailing permit from some up-the-coast point had come down in
+this sloop to catch the regular fruit steamer on its return trip.
+Like a coquettish pigeon the little boat tacked on its eccentric way
+until at last its white sail was lost to sight against the larger
+bulk of the fruiter's side.
+
+"That's old H. P. Mellinger," explained Keogh, dropping back into his
+chair. "He's going back to New York. He was private secretary of the
+late hot-foot president of this grocery and fruit stand that they
+call a country. His job's over now; and I guess old Mellinger is
+glad."
+
+"Why does he disappear to music, like Zo-zo, the magic queen?" asked
+Johnny. "Just to show 'em that he doesn't care?"
+
+"That noise you heard is a phonograph," said Keogh. "I sold him that.
+Mellinger had a graft in this country that was the only thing of its
+kind in the world. The tooting machine saved it for him once, and he
+always carried it around with him afterward."
+
+"Tell me about it," demanded Johnny, betraying interest.
+
+"I'm no disseminator of narratives," said Keogh. "I can use language
+for purposes of speech; but when I attempt a discourse the words
+come out as they will, and they may make sense when they strike the
+atmosphere, or they may not."
+
+"I want to hear about that graft," persisted Johnny. "You've got
+no right to refuse. I've told you all about every man, woman and
+hitching post in Dalesburg."
+
+"You shall hear it," said Keogh. "I said my instincts of narrative
+were perplexed. Don't you believe it. It's an art I've acquired along
+with many other of the graces and sciences."
+
+
+
+
+VI
+
+THE PHONOGRAPH AND THE GRAFT
+
+
+"What was this graft?" asked Johnny, with the impatience of the great
+public to whom tales are told.
+
+"'Tis contrary to art and philosophy to give you the information,"
+said Keogh, calmly. "The art of narrative consists in concealing from
+your audience everything it wants to know until after you expose your
+favourite opinions on topics foreign to the subject. A good story is
+like a bitter pill with the sugar coating inside of it. I will begin,
+if you please, with a horoscope located in the Cherokee Nation; and
+end with a moral tune on the phonograph.
+
+"Me and Henry Horsecollar brought the first phonograph to this
+country. Henry was a quarter-breed, quarter-back Cherokee, educated
+East in the idioms of football, and West in contraband whisky, and
+a gentleman, the same as you and me. He was easy and romping in his
+ways; a man about six foot, with a kind of rubber-tire movement. Yes,
+he was a little man about five foot five, or five foot eleven. He was
+what you would call a medium tall man of average smallness. Henry had
+quit college once, and the Muscogee jail three times--the last-named
+institution on account of introducing and selling whisky in the
+territories. Henry Horsecollar never let any cigar stores come up and
+stand behind him. He didn't belong to that tribe of Indians.
+
+"Henry and me met at Texarkana, and figured out this phonograph
+scheme. He had $360 which came to him out of a land allotment in
+the reservation. I had run down from Little Rock on account of a
+distressful scene I had witnessed on the street there. A man stood on
+a box and passed around some gold watches, screw case, stem-winders,
+Elgin movement, very elegant. Twenty bucks they cost you over the
+counter. At three dollars the crowd fought for the tickers. The man
+happened to find a valise full of them handy, and he passed them out
+like putting hot biscuits on a plate. The backs were hard to unscrew,
+but the crowd put its ear to the case, and they ticked mollifying and
+agreeable. Three of these watches were genuine tickers; the rest were
+only kickers. Hey? Why, empty cases with one of them horny black bugs
+that fly around electric lights in 'em. Them bugs kick off minutes
+and seconds industrious and beautiful. So, this man I was speaking
+of cleaned up $288; and then he went away, because he knew that when
+it came time to wind watches in Little Rock an entomologist would be
+needed, and he wasn't one.
+
+"So, as I say, Henry had $360, and I had $288. The idea of
+introducing the phonograph to South America was Henry's; but I took
+to it freely, being fond of machinery of all kinds.
+
+"'The Latin races,' says Henry, explaining easy in the idioms he
+learned at college, 'are peculiarly adapted to be victims of the
+phonograph. They have the artistic temperament. They yearn for music
+and color and gaiety. They give wampum to the hand-organ man and the
+four-legged chicken in the tent when they're months behind with the
+grocery and the bread-fruit tree.'
+
+"'Then,' says I, 'we'll export canned music to the Latins; but I'm
+mindful of Mr. Julius Caesar's account of 'em where he says: "_Omnia
+Gallia in tres partes divisa est_;" which is the same as to say, "We
+will need all of our gall in devising means to tree them parties."'
+
+"I hated to make a show of education; but I was disinclined to be
+overdone in syntax by a mere Indian, a member of a race to which we
+owe nothing except the land on which the United States is situated.
+
+"We bought a fine phonograph in Texarkana--one of the best make--and
+half a trunkful of records. We packed up, and took the T. and
+P. for New Orleans. From that celebrated centre of molasses and
+disfranchised coon songs we took a steamer for South America.
+
+"We landed at Solitas, forty miles up the coast from here. 'Twas a
+palatable enough place to look at. The houses were clean and white;
+and to look at 'em stuck around among the scenery they reminded
+you of hard-boiled eggs served with lettuce. There was a block of
+skyscraper mountains in the suburbs; and they kept pretty quiet, like
+they had crept up there and were watching the town. And the sea was
+remarking 'Sh-sh-sh' on the beach; and now and then a ripe cocoanut
+would drop kerblip in the sand; and that was all there was doing.
+Yes, I judge that town was considerably on the quiet. I judge that
+after Gabriel quits blowing his horn, and the car starts, with
+Philadelphia swinging to the last strap, and Pine Gully, Arkansas,
+hanging onto the rear step, this town of Solitas will wake up and ask
+if anybody spoke.
+
+"The captain went ashore with us, and offered to conduct what he
+seemed to like to call the obsequies. He introduced Henry and me to
+the United States Consul, and a roan man, the head of the Department
+of Mercenary and Licentious Dispositions, the way it read upon his
+sign.
+
+"'I touch here again a week from to-day,' says the captain.
+
+"'By that time,' we told him, 'we'll be amassing wealth in the
+interior towns with our galvanized prima donna and correct imitations
+of Sousa's band excavating a march from a tin mine.'
+
+"'Ye'll not,' says the captain. 'Ye'll be hypnotized. Any gentleman
+in the audience who kindly steps upon the stage and looks this
+country in the eye will be converted to the hypothesis that he's but
+a fly in the Elgin creamery. Ye'll be standing knee deep in the surf
+waiting for me, and your machine for making Hamburger steak out of
+the hitherto respected art of music will be playing "There's no place
+like home."'
+
+"Henry skinned a twenty off his roll, and received from the Bureau
+of Mercenary Dispositions a paper bearing a red seal and a dialect
+story, and no change.
+
+"Then we got the consul full of red wine, and struck him for a
+horoscope. He was a thin, youngish kind of man, I should say past
+fifty, sort of French-Irish in his affections, and puffed up with
+disconsolation. Yes, he was a flattened kind of a man, in whom drink
+lay stagnant, inclined to corpulence and misery. Yes, I think he was
+a kind of Dutchman, being very sad and genial in his ways.
+
+"'The marvelous invention,' he says, 'entitled the phonograph, has
+never invaded these shores. The people have never heard it. They
+would not believe it if they should. Simple-hearted children of
+nature, progress has never condemned them to accept the work of a
+can-opener as an overture, and rag-time might incite them to a bloody
+revolution. But you can try the experiment. The best chance you have
+is that the populace may not wake up when you play. There's two
+ways,' says the consul, 'they may take it. They may become inebriated
+with attention, like an Atlanta colonel listening to "Marching
+Through Georgia," or they will get excited and transpose the key of
+the music with an axe and yourselves into a dungeon. In the latter
+case,' says the consul, 'I'll do my duty by cabling to the State
+Department, and I'll wrap the Stars and Stripes around you when you
+come to be shot, and threaten them with the vengeance of the greatest
+gold export and financial reserve nation on earth. The flag is
+full of bullet holes now,' says the consul, 'made in that way.
+Twice before,' says the consul, 'I have cabled our government for a
+couple of gunboats to protect American citizens. The first time the
+Department sent me a pair of gum boots. The other time was when a man
+named Pease was going to be executed here. They referred that appeal
+to the Secretary of Agriculture. Let us now disturb the senor behind
+the bar for a subsequence of the red wine.'
+
+"Thus soliloquized the consul of Solitas to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+
+"But, notwithstanding, we hired a room that afternoon in the Calle de
+los Angeles, the main street that runs along the shore, and put our
+trunks there. 'Twas a good-sized room, dark and cheerful, but small.
+'Twas on a various street, diversified by houses and conservatory
+plants. The peasantry of the city passed to and fro on the fine
+pasturage between the sidewalks. 'Twas, for the world, like an opera
+chorus when the Royal Kafoozlum is about to enter.
+
+"We were rubbing the dust off the machine and getting fixed to
+start business the next day, when a big, fine-looking white man in
+white clothes stopped at the door and looked in. We extended the
+invitations, and he walked inside and sized us up. He was chewing a
+long cigar, and wrinkling his eyes, meditative, like a girl trying to
+decide which dress to wear to the party.
+
+"'New York?' he says to me finally.
+
+"'Originally, and from time to time,' I says. 'Hasn't it rubbed off
+yet?'
+
+"'It's simple,' says he, 'when you know how. It's the fit of the
+vest. They don't cut vests right anywhere else. Coats, maybe, but not
+vests.'
+
+"The white man looks at Henry Horsecollar and hesitates.
+
+"'Injun,' says Henry; 'tame Injun.'
+
+"'Mellinger,' says the man--'Homer P. Mellinger. Boys, you're
+confiscated. You're babes in the wood without a chaperon or referee,
+and it's my duty to start you going. I'll knock out the props and
+launch you proper in the pellucid waters of this tropical mud puddle.
+You'll have to be christened, and if you'll come with me I'll break a
+bottle of wine across your bows, according to Hoyle.'
+
+"Well, for two days Homer P. Mellinger did the honors. That man cut
+ice in Anchuria. He was It. He was the Royal Kafoozlum. If me and
+Henry was babes in the wood, he was a Robin Redbreast from the
+topmost bough. Him and me and Henry Horsecollar locked arms, and
+toted that phonograph around, and had wassail and diversions.
+Everywhere we found doors open we went inside and set the machine
+going, and Mellinger called upon the people to observe the artful
+music and his two lifelong friends, the Senors Americanos. The opera
+chorus was agitated with esteem, and followed us from house to house.
+There was a different kind of drink to be had with every tune. The
+natives had acquirements of a pleasant thing in the way of a drink
+that gums itself to the recollection. They chop off the end of a
+green cocoanut, and pour in on the juice of it French brandy and
+other adjuvants. We had them and other things.
+
+"Mine and Henry's money was counterfeit. Everything was on Homer P.
+Mellinger. That man could find rolls of bills concealed in places
+on his person where Hermann the Wizard couldn't have conjured out a
+rabbit or an omelette. He could have founded universities, and made
+orchid collections, and then had enough left to purchase the colored
+vote of his country. Henry and me wondered what his graft was. One
+evening he told us.
+
+"'Boys,' said he, 'I've deceived you. You think I'm a painted
+butterfly; but in fact I'm the hardest worked man in this country.
+Ten years ago I landed on its shores; and two years ago on the point
+of its jaw. Yes, I guess I can get the decision over this ginger cake
+commonwealth at the end of any round I choose. I'll confide in you
+because you are my countrymen and guests, even if you have assaulted
+my adopted shores with the worst system of noises ever set to music.
+
+"'My job is private secretary to the president of this republic; and
+my duties are running it. I'm not headlined in the bills, but I'm the
+mustard in the salad dressing just the same. There isn't a law goes
+before Congress, there isn't a concession granted, there isn't an
+import duty levied but what H. P. Mellinger he cooks and seasons
+it. In the front office I fill the president's inkstand and search
+visiting statesmen for dirks and dynamite; but in the back room I
+dictate the policy of the government. You'd never guess in the world
+how I got my pull. It's the only graft of its kind on earth. I'll put
+you wise. You remember the old top-liner in the copy book--"Honesty
+is the Best Policy"? That's it. I'm working honesty for a graft. I'm
+the only honest man in the republic. The government knows it; the
+people know it; the boodlers know it; the foreign investors know it.
+I make the government keep its faith. If a man is promised a job he
+gets it. If outside capital buys a concession it gets the goods. I
+run a monopoly of square dealing here. There's no competition. If
+Colonel Diogenes were to flash his lantern in this precinct he'd have
+my address inside of two minutes. There isn't big money in it, but
+it's a sure thing, and lets a man sleep of nights.'
+
+"Thus Homer P. Mellinger made oration to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+And, later, he divested himself of this remark:
+
+"'Boys, I'm to hold a _soiree_ this evening with a gang of leading
+citizens, and I want your assistance. You bring the musical corn
+sheller and give the affair the outside appearance of a function.
+There's important business on hand, but it mustn't show. I can talk
+to you people. I've been pained for years on account of not having
+anybody to blow off and brag to. I get homesick sometimes, and I'd
+swap the entire perquisites of office for just one hour to have a
+stein and a caviare sandwich somewhere on Thirty-fourth Street, and
+stand and watch the street cars go by, and smell the peanut roaster
+at old Giuseppe's fruit stand.'
+
+"'Yes,' said I, 'there's fine caviare at Billy Renfrew's cafe, corner
+of Thirty-fourth and--'
+
+"'God knows it,' interrupts Mellinger, 'and if you'd told me you knew
+Billy Renfrew I'd have invented tons of ways of making you happy.
+Billy was my side-kicker in New York. There is a man who never knew
+what crooked was. Here I am working Honesty for a graft, but that man
+loses money on it. Carrambos! I get sick at times of this country.
+Everything's rotten. From the executive down to the coffee pickers,
+they're plotting to down each other and skin their friends. If a mule
+driver takes off his hat to an official, that man figures it out that
+he's a popular idol, and sets his pegs to stir up a revolution and
+upset the administration. It's one of my little chores as private
+secretary to smell out these revolutions and affix the kibosh before
+they break out and scratch the paint off the government property.
+That's why I'm down here now in this mildewed coast town. The
+governor of the district and his crew are plotting to uprise. I've
+got every one of their names, and they're invited to listen to the
+phonograph to-night, compliments of H. P. M. That's the way I'll get
+them in a bunch, and things are on the programme to happen to them.'
+
+"We three were sitting at table in the cantina of the Purified
+Saints. Mellinger poured out wine, and was looking some worried; I
+was thinking.
+
+"'They're a sharp crowd,' he says, kind of fretful. 'They're
+capitalized by a foreign syndicate after rubber, and they're loaded
+to the muzzle for bribing. I'm sick,' goes on Mellinger, 'of comic
+opera. I want to smell East River and wear suspenders again. At times
+I feel like throwing up my job, but I'm d----n fool enough to be sort
+of proud of it. "There's Mellinger," they say here. "_Por Dios!_ you
+can't touch him with a million." I'd like to take that record back
+and show it to Billy Renfrew some day; and that tightens my grip
+whenever I see a fat thing that I could corral just by winking one
+eye--and losing my graft. By ----, they can't monkey with me. They
+know it. What money I get I make honest and spend it. Some day I'll
+make a pile and go back and eat caviare with Billy. To-night I'll
+show you how to handle a bunch of corruptionists. I'll show them what
+Mellinger, private secretary, means when you spell it with the cotton
+and tissue paper off.'
+
+"Mellinger appears shaky, and breaks his glass against the neck of
+the bottle.
+
+"I says to myself, 'White man, if I'm not mistaken there's been a
+bait laid out where the tail of your eye could see it.'
+
+"That night, according to arrangements, me and Henry took the
+phonograph to a room in a 'dobe house in a dirty side street, where
+the grass was knee high. 'Twas a long room, lit with smoky oil lamps.
+There was plenty of chairs, and a table at the back end. We set the
+phonograph on the table. Mellinger was there, walking up and down,
+disturbed in his predicaments. He chewed cigars and spat 'em out, and
+he bit the thumb nail of his left hand.
+
+"By and by the invitations to the musicale came sliding in by pairs
+and threes and spade flushes. Their colour was of a diversity,
+running from a three-days' smoked meerschaum to a patent-leather
+polish. They were as polite as wax, being devastated with enjoyments
+to give Senor Mellinger the good evenings. I understood their Spanish
+talk--I ran a pumping engine two years in a Mexican silver mine, and
+had it pat--but I never let on.
+
+"Maybe fifty of 'em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king
+bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door, and
+escorted him to the grand stand. When I saw that Latin man I knew
+that Mellinger, private secretary, had all the dances on his card
+taken. That was a big, squashy man, the colour of a rubber overshoe,
+and he had an eye like a head waiter's.
+
+"Mellinger explained, fluent, in the Castilian idioms, that his soul
+was disconcerted with joy at introducing to his respected friends
+America's greatest invention, the wonder of the age. Henry got the
+cue and run on an elegant brass-band record and the festivities
+became initiated. The governor man had a bit of English under his
+hat, and when the music was choked off he says:
+
+"'Ver-r-ree fine. _Gr-r-r-r-racias_, the American gentleemen, the so
+esplendeed moosic as to playee.'
+
+"The table was a long one, and Henry and me sat at the end of it next
+the wall. The governor sat at the other end. Homer P. Mellinger stood
+at the side of it. I was just wondering how Mellinger was going to
+handle his crowd, when the home talent suddenly opened the services.
+
+"That governor man was suitable for uprisings and policies. I judge
+he was a ready kind of man, who took his own time. Yes, he was full
+of attention and immediateness. He leaned his hands on the table and
+imposed his face toward the secretary man.
+
+"'Do the American senors understand Spanish?' he asks in his native
+accents.
+
+"'They do not,' says Mellinger.
+
+"'Then listen,' goes on the Latin man, prompt. 'The musics are
+of sufficient prettiness, but not of necessity. Let us speak
+of business. I well know why we are here, since I observe my
+compatriots. You had a whisper yesterday, Senor Mellinger, of our
+proposals. To-night we will speak out. We know that you stand in
+the president's favour, and we know your influence. The government
+will be changed. We know the worth of your services. We esteem your
+friendship and aid so much that'--Mellinger raises his hand, but the
+governor man bottles him up. 'Do not speak until I have done.'
+
+"The governor man then draws a package wrapped in paper from his
+pocket, and lays it on the table by Mellinger's hand.
+
+"'In that you will find fifty thousand dollars in money of your
+country. You can do nothing against us, but you can be worth that for
+us. Go back to the capital and obey our instructions. Take that money
+now. We trust you. You will find with it a paper giving in detail the
+work you will be expected to do for us. Do not have the unwiseness to
+refuse.'
+
+"The governor man paused, with his eyes fixed on Mellinger, full of
+expressions and observances. I looked at Mellinger, and was glad
+Billy Renfrew couldn't see him then. The sweat was popping out on his
+forehead, and he stood dumb, tapping the little package with the ends
+of his fingers. The colorado-maduro gang was after his graft. He had
+only to change his politics, and stuff five fingers in his inside
+pocket.
+
+"Henry whispers to me and wants the pause in the programme
+interpreted. I whisper back: 'H. P. is up against a bribe, senator's
+size, and the coons have got him going.' I saw Mellinger's hand
+moving closer to the package. 'He's weakening,' I whispered to
+Henry. 'We'll remind him,' says Henry, 'of the peanut-roaster on
+Thirty-fourth Street, New York.'
+
+"Henry stooped down and got a record from the basketful we'd brought,
+slid it in the phonograph, and started her off. It was a cornet solo,
+very neat and beautiful, and the name of it was 'Home, Sweet Home.'
+Not one of them fifty odd men in the room moved while it was playing,
+and the governor man kept his eyes steady on Mellinger. I saw
+Mellinger's head go up little by little, and his hand came creeping
+away from the package. Not until the last note sounded did anybody
+stir. And then Homer P. Mellinger takes up the bundle of boodle and
+slams it in the governor man's face.
+
+"'That's my answer,' says Mellinger, private secretary, 'and there'll
+be another in the morning. I have proofs of conspiracy against every
+man of you. The show is over, gentlemen.'
+
+"'There's one more act,' puts in the governor man. 'You are a
+servant, I believe, employed by the president to copy letters and
+answer raps at the door. I am governor here. _Senores_, I call upon
+you in the name of the cause to seize this man.'
+
+"That brindled gang of conspirators shoved back their chairs and
+advanced in force. I could see where Mellinger had made a mistake in
+massing his enemy so as to make a grand-stand play. I think he made
+another one, too; but we can pass that, Mellinger's idea of a graft
+and mine being different, according to estimations and points of
+view.
+
+"There was only one window and door in that room, and they were in
+the front end. Here was fifty odd Latin men coming in a bunch to
+obstruct the legislation of Mellinger. You may say there were three
+of us, for me and Henry, simultaneous, declared New York City and the
+Cherokee Nation in sympathy with the weaker party.
+
+"Then it was that Henry Horsecollar rose to a point of disorder
+and intervened, showing, admirable, the advantages of education
+as applied to the American Indian's natural intellect and native
+refinement. He stood up and smoothed back his hair on each side with
+his hands as you have seen little girls do when they play.
+
+"'Get behind me, both of you,' says Henry.
+
+"'What's it to be, chief?' I asked.
+
+"'I'm going to buck centre,' says Henry, in his football idioms.
+'There isn't a tackle in the lot of them. Follow me close, and rush
+the game.'
+
+"Then that cultured Red Man exhaled an arrangement of sounds with
+his mouth that made the Latin aggregation pause, with thoughtfulness
+and hesitations. The matter of his proclamation seemed to be a
+co-operation of the Carlisle war-whoop with the Cherokee college
+yell. He went at the chocolate team like a bean out of a little boy's
+nigger shooter. His right elbow laid out the governor man on the
+gridiron, and he made a lane the length of the crowd so wide that a
+woman could have carried a step-ladder through it without striking
+against anything. All Mellinger and me had to do was to follow.
+
+"It took us just three minutes to get out of that street around to
+military headquarters, where Mellinger had things his own way. A
+colonel and a battalion of bare-toed infantry turned out and went
+back to the scene of the musicale with us, but the conspirator gang
+was gone. But we recaptured the phonograph with honours of war, and
+marched back to the _cuartel_ with it playing 'All Coons Look Alike
+to Me.'
+
+"The next day Mellinger takes me and Henry to one side, and begins to
+shed tens and twenties.
+
+"'I want to buy that phonograph,' says he. 'I liked that last tune it
+played at the _soiree_.'
+
+"'This is more money than the machine is worth,' says I.
+
+"''Tis government expense money,' says Mellinger. 'The government
+pays for it, and it's getting the tune-grinder cheap.'
+
+"Me and Henry knew that pretty well. We knew that it had saved Homer
+P. Mellinger's graft when he was on the point of losing it; but we
+never let him know we knew it.
+
+"'Now you boys better slide off further down the coast for a while,'
+says Mellinger, 'till I get the screws put on these fellows here. If
+you don't they'll give you trouble. And if you ever happen to see
+Billy Renfrew again before I do, tell him I'm coming back to New York
+as soon as I can make a stake--honest.'
+
+"Me and Henry laid low until the day the steamer came back. When we
+saw the captain's boat on the beach we went down and stood in the
+edge of the water. The captain grinned when he saw us.
+
+"'I told you you'd be waiting,' he says. 'Where's the Hamburger
+machine?'
+
+"'It stays behind,' I says, 'to play "Home, Sweet Home."'
+
+"'I told you so,' says the captain again. 'Climb in the boat.'
+
+"And that," said Keogh, "is the way me and Henry Horsecollar
+introduced the phonograph into this country. Henry went back to the
+States, but I've been rummaging around in the tropics ever since.
+They say Mellinger never travelled a mile after that without his
+phonograph. I guess it kept him reminded about his graft whenever he
+saw the siren voice of the boodler tip him the wink with a bribe in
+its hand."
+
+"I suppose he's taking it home with him as a souvenir," remarked the
+consul.
+
+"Not as a souvenir," said Keogh. "He'll need two of 'em in New York,
+running day and night."
+
+
+
+
+VII
+
+MONEY MAZE
+
+
+The new administration of Anchuria entered upon its duties and
+privileges with enthusiasm. Its first act was to send an agent to
+Coralio with imperative orders to recover, if possible, the sum of
+money ravished from the treasury by the ill-fated Miraflores.
+
+Colonel Emilio Falcon, the private secretary of Losada, the new
+president, was despatched from the capital upon this important
+mission.
+
+The position of private secretary to a tropical president is a
+responsible one. He must be a diplomat, a spy, a ruler of men, a
+body-guard to his chief, and a smeller-out of plots and nascent
+revolutions. Often he is the power behind the throne, the dictator of
+policy; and a president chooses him with a dozen times the care with
+which he selects a matrimonial mate.
+
+Colonel Falcon, a handsome and urbane gentleman of Castilian courtesy
+and debonnaire manners, came to Coralio with the task before him of
+striking upon the cold trail of the lost money. There he conferred
+with the military authorities, who had received instructions to
+co-operate with him in the search.
+
+Colonel Falcon established his headquarters in one of the rooms of
+the Casa Morena. Here for a week he held informal sittings--much as
+if he were a kind of unified grand jury--and summoned before him all
+those whose testimony might illumine the financial tragedy that had
+accompanied the less momentous one of the late president's death.
+
+Two or three who were thus examined, among whom was the barber
+Esteban, declared that they had identified the body of the president
+before its burial.
+
+"Of a truth," testified Esteban before the mighty secretary, "it was
+he, the president. Consider!--how could I shave a man and not see his
+face? He sent for me to shave him in a small house. He had a beard
+very black and thick. Had I ever seen the president before? Why not?
+I saw him once ride forth in a carriage from the _vapor_ in Solitas.
+When I shaved him he gave me a gold piece, and said there was to be
+no talk. But I am a Liberal--I am devoted to my country--and I spake
+of these things to Senor Goodwin."
+
+"It is known," said Colonel Falcon, smoothly, "that the late
+President took with him an American leather valise, containing a
+large amount of money. Did you see that?"
+
+"_De veras_--no," Esteban answered. "The light in the little house
+was but a small lamp by which I could scarcely see to shave the
+President. Such a thing there may have been, but I did not see
+it. No. Also in the room was a young lady--a senorita of much
+beauty--that I could see even in so small a light. But the money,
+senor, or the thing in which it was carried--that I did not see."
+
+The _comandante_ and other officers gave testimony that they had been
+awakened and alarmed by the noise of a pistol-shot in the Hotel de
+los Estranjeros. Hurrying thither to protect the peace and dignity of
+the republic, they found a man lying dead, with a pistol clutched in
+his hand. Beside him was a young woman, weeping sorely. Senor Goodwin
+was also in the room when they entered it. But of the valise of money
+they saw nothing.
+
+Madame Timotea Ortiz, the proprietress of the hotel in which the game
+of Fox-in-the-Morning had been played out, told of the coming of the
+two guests to her house.
+
+"To my house they came," said she--"one _senor_, not quite old, and
+one _senorita_ of sufficient handsomeness. They desired not to eat or
+to drink--not even of my _aguardiente_, which is the best. To their
+rooms they ascended--_Numero Nueve_ and _Numero Diez_. Later came
+Senor Goodwin, who ascended to speak with them. Then I heard a
+great noise like that of a _canon_, and they said that the _pobre
+Presidente_ had shot himself. _Esta bueno._ I saw nothing of money or
+of the thing you call _veliz_ that you say he carried it in."
+
+Colonel Falcon soon came to the reasonable conclusion that if anyone
+in Coralio could furnish a clue to the vanished money, Frank Goodwin
+must be the man. But the wise secretary pursued a different course in
+seeking information from the American. Goodwin was a powerful friend
+to the new administration, and one who was not to be carelessly
+dealt with in respect to either his honesty or his courage. Even the
+private secretary of His Excellency hesitated to have this rubber
+prince and mahogany baron haled before him as a common citizen of
+Anchuria. So he sent Goodwin a flowery epistle, each word-petal
+dripping with honey, requesting the favour of an interview. Goodwin
+replied with an invitation to dinner at his own house.
+
+Before the hour named the American walked over to the Casa Morena,
+and greeted his guest frankly and friendly. Then the two strolled, in
+the cool of the afternoon, to Goodwin's home in the environs.
+
+The American left Colonel Falcon in a big, cool, shadowed room with a
+floor of inlaid and polished woods that any millionaire in the States
+would have envied, excusing himself for a few minutes. He crossed a
+_patio_, shaded with deftly arranged awnings and plants, and entered
+a long room looking upon the sea in the opposite wing of the house.
+The broad jalousies were opened wide, and the ocean breeze flowed
+in through the room, an invisible current of coolness and health.
+Goodwin's wife sat near one of the windows, making a water-color
+sketch of the afternoon seascape.
+
+Here was a woman who looked to be happy. And more--she looked to be
+content. Had a poet been inspired to pen just similes concerning
+her favour, he would have likened her full, clear eyes, with their
+white-encircled, gray irises, to moonflowers. With none of the
+goddesses whose traditional charms have become coldly classic
+would the discerning rhymester have compared her. She was purely
+Paradisaic, not Olympian. If you can imagine Eve, after the eviction,
+beguiling the flaming warriors and serenely re-entering the Garden,
+you will have her. Just so human, and still so harmonious with Eden
+seemed Mrs. Goodwin.
+
+When her husband entered she looked up, and her lips curved and
+parted; her eyelids fluttered twice or thrice--a movement remindful
+(Poesy forgive us!) of the tail-wagging of a faithful dog--and a
+little ripple went through her like the commotion set up in a weeping
+willow by a puff of wind. Thus she ever acknowledged his coming, were
+it twenty times a day. If they who sometimes sat over their wine
+in Coralio, reshaping old, diverting stories of the madcap career
+of Isabel Guilbert, could have seen the wife of Frank Goodwin that
+afternoon in the estimable aura of her happy wifehood, they might
+have disbelieved, or have agreed to forget, those graphic annals of
+the life of the one for whom their president gave up his country and
+his honour.
+
+"I have brought a guest to dinner," said Goodwin. "One Colonel
+Falcon, from San Mateo. He is come on government business. I do not
+think you will care to see him, so I prescribe for you one of those
+convenient and indisputable feminine headaches."
+
+"He has come to inquire about the lost money, has he not?" asked Mrs.
+Goodwin, going on with her sketch.
+
+"A good guess!" acknowledged Goodwin. "He has been holding an
+inquisition among the natives for three days. I am next on his list
+of witnesses, but as he feels shy about dragging one of Uncle Sam's
+subjects before him, he consents to give it the outward appearance
+of a social function. He will apply the torture over my own wine and
+provender."
+
+"Has he found anyone who saw the valise of money?"
+
+"Not a soul. Even Madama Ortiz, whose eyes are so sharp for the sight
+of a revenue official, does not remember that there was any baggage."
+
+Mrs. Goodwin laid down her brush and sighed.
+
+"I am so sorry, Frank," she said, "that they are giving you so much
+trouble about the money. But we can't let them know about it, can
+we?"
+
+"Not without doing our intelligence a great injustice," said Goodwin,
+with a smile and a shrug that he had picked up from the natives.
+"_Americano_, though I am, they would have me in the _calaboza_ in
+half an hour if they knew we had appropriated that valise. No; we
+must appear as ignorant about the money as the other ignoramuses in
+Coralio."
+
+"Do you think that this man they have sent suspects you?" she asked,
+with a little pucker of her brows.
+
+"He'd better not," said the American, carelessly. "It's lucky that no
+one caught a sight of the valise except myself. As I was in the rooms
+when the shot was fired, it is not surprising that they should want
+to investigate my part in the affair rather closely. But there's no
+cause for alarm. This colonel is down on the list of events for a
+good dinner, with a dessert of American 'bluff' that will end the
+matter, I think."
+
+Mrs. Goodwin rose and walked to the window. Goodwin followed and
+stood by her side. She leaned to him, and rested in the protection of
+his strength, as she had always rested since that dark night on which
+he had first made himself her tower of refuge. Thus they stood for a
+little while.
+
+Straight through the lavish growth of tropical branch and leaf
+and vine that confronted them had been cunningly trimmed a vista,
+that ended at the cleared environs of Coralio, on the banks of the
+mangrove swamp. At the other end of the aerial tunnel they could see
+the grave and wooden headpiece that bore the name of the unhappy
+President Miraflores. From this window when the rains forbade the
+open, and from the green and shady slopes of Goodwin's fruitful
+lands when the skies were smiling, his wife was wont to look upon
+that grave with a gentle sadness that was now scarcely a mar to her
+happiness.
+
+"I loved him so, Frank!" she said, "even after that terrible flight
+and its awful ending. And you have been so good to me, and have made
+me so happy. It has all grown into such a strange puzzle. If they
+were to find out that we got the money do you think they would force
+you to make the amount good to the government?"
+
+"They would undoubtedly try," answered Goodwin. "You are right about
+its being a puzzle. And it must remain a puzzle to Falcon and all
+his countrymen until it solves itself. You and I, who know more than
+anyone else, only know half of the solution. We must not let even a
+hint about this money get abroad. Let them come to the theory that
+the president concealed it in the mountains during his journey, or
+that he found means to ship it out of the country before he reached
+Coralio. I don't think that Falcon suspects me. He is making a close
+investigation, according to his orders, but he will find out
+nothing."
+
+Thus they spake together. Had anyone overheard or overseen them as
+they discussed the lost funds of Anchuria there would have been a
+second puzzle presented. For upon the faces and in the bearing of
+each of them was visible (if countenances are to be believed) Saxon
+honesty and pride and honourable thoughts. In Goodwin's steady eye
+and firm lineaments, moulded into material shape by the inward
+spirit of kindness and generosity and courage, there was nothing
+reconcilable with his words.
+
+As for his wife, physiognomy championed her even in the face of their
+accusive talk. Nobility was in her guise; purity was in her glance.
+The devotion that she manifested had not even the appearance of that
+feeling that now and then inspires a woman to share the guilt of her
+partner out of the pathetic greatness of her love. No, there was a
+discrepancy here between what the eye would have seen and the ear
+have heard.
+
+Dinner was served to Goodwin and his guest in the _patio_, under cool
+foliage and flowers. The American begged the illustrious secretary to
+excuse the absence of Mrs. Goodwin, who was suffering, he said, from
+a headache brought on by a slight _calentura_.
+
+After the meal they lingered, according to the custom, over their
+coffee and cigars. Colonel Falcon, with true Castilian delicacy,
+waited for his host to open the question that they had met to
+discuss. He had not long to wait. As soon as the cigars were lighted,
+the American cleared the way by inquiring whether the secretary's
+investigations in the town had furnished him with any clue to the
+lost funds.
+
+"I have found no one yet," admitted Colonel Falcon, "who even had
+sight of the valise or the money. Yet I have persisted. It has been
+proven in the capital that President Miraflores set out from San
+Mateo with one hundred thousand dollars belonging to the government,
+accompanied by _Senorita_ Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer. The
+Government, officially and personally, is loathe to believe,"
+concluded Colonel Falcon, with a smile, "that our late President's
+tastes would have permitted him to abandon on the route, as excess
+baggage, either of the desirable articles with which his flight was
+burdened."
+
+"I suppose you would like to hear what I have to say about the
+affair," said Goodwin, coming directly to the point. "It will not
+require many words.
+
+"On that night, with others of our friends here, I was keeping a
+lookout for the president, having been notified of his flight by a
+telegram in our national cipher from Englehart, one of our leaders
+in the capital. About ten o'clock that night I saw a man and a
+woman hurrying along the streets. They went to the Hotel de los
+Estranjeros, and engaged rooms. I followed them upstairs, leaving
+Esteban, who had come up, to watch outside. The barber had told me
+that he had shaved the beard from the president's face that night;
+therefore I was prepared, when I entered the rooms, to find him with
+a smooth face. When I apprehended him in the name of the people he
+drew a pistol and shot himself instantly. In a few minutes many
+officers and citizens were on the spot. I suppose you have been
+informed of the subsequent facts."
+
+Goodwin paused. Losada's agent maintained an attitude of waiting, as
+if he expected a continuance.
+
+"And now," went on the American, looking steadily into the eyes of
+the other man, and giving each word a deliberate emphasis, "you will
+oblige me by attending carefully to what I have to add. I saw no
+valise or receptacle of any kind, or any money belonging to the
+Republic of Anchuria. If President Miraflores decamped with any funds
+belonging to the treasury of this country, or to himself, or to
+anyone else, I saw no trace of it in the house or elsewhere, at that
+time or at any other. Does that statement cover the ground of the
+inquiry you wished to make of me?"
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed, and described a fluent curve with his cigar.
+His duty was performed. Goodwin was not to be disputed. He was a
+loyal supporter of the government, and enjoyed the full confidence
+of the new president. His rectitude had been the capital that had
+brought him fortune in Anchuria, just as it had formed the lucrative
+"graft" of Mellinger, the secretary of Miraflores.
+
+"I thank you, _Senor_ Goodwin," said Falcon, "for speaking plainly.
+Your word will be sufficient for the president. But, _Senor_ Goodwin,
+I am instructed to pursue every clue that presents itself in this
+matter. There is one that I have not yet touched upon. Our friends
+in France, _senor_, have a saying, '_Cherchez la femme_,' when there
+is a mystery without a clue. But here we do not have to search. The
+woman who accompanied the late President in his flight must surely--"
+
+"I must interrupt you there," interposed Goodwin. "It is true that
+when I entered the hotel for the purpose of intercepting President
+Miraflores I found a lady there. I must beg of you to remember that
+that lady is now my wife. I speak for her as I do for myself. She
+knows nothing of the fate of the valise or of the money that you
+are seeking. You will say to his excellency that I guarantee her
+innocence. I do not need to add to you, Colonel Falcon, that I do not
+care to have her questioned or disturbed."
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed again.
+
+"_Por supuesto_, no!" he cried. And to indicate that the inquiry was
+ended he added: "And now, _senor_, let me beg of you to show me that
+sea view from your _galeria_ of which you spoke. I am a lover of the
+sea."
+
+In the early evening Goodwin walked back to the town with his guest,
+leaving him at the corner of the Calle Grande. As he was returning
+homeward one "Beelzebub" Blythe, with the air of a courtier and the
+outward aspect of a scarecrow, pounced upon him hopefully from the
+door of a _pulperia_.
+
+Blythe had been re-christened "Beelzebub" as an acknowledgment of the
+greatness of his fall. Once in some distant Paradise Lost, he had
+foregathered with the angels of the earth. But Fate had hurled him
+headlong down to the tropics, where flamed in his bosom a fire that
+was seldom quenched. In Coralio they called him a beachcomber; but he
+was, in reality, a categorical idealist who strove to anamorphosize
+the dull verities of life by the means of brandy and rum. As
+Beelzebub, himself, might have held in his clutch with unwitting
+tenacity his harp or crown during his tremendous fall, so his
+namesake had clung to his gold-rimmed eyeglasses as the only souvenir
+of his lost estate. These he wore with impressiveness and distinction
+while he combed beaches and extracted toll from his friends. By some
+mysterious means he kept his drink-reddened face always smoothly
+shaven. For the rest he sponged gracefully upon whomsoever he could
+for enough to keep him pretty drunk, and sheltered from the rains and
+night dews.
+
+"Hallo, Goodwin!" called the derelict, airily. "I was hoping I'd
+strike you. I wanted to see you particularly. Suppose we go where we
+can talk. Of course you know there's a chap down here looking up the
+money old Miraflores lost."
+
+"Yes," said Goodwin, "I've been talking with him. Let's go into
+Espada's place. I can spare you ten minutes."
+
+They went into the _pulperia_ and sat at a little table upon stools
+with rawhide tops.
+
+"Have a drink?" said Goodwin.
+
+"They can't bring it too quickly," said Blythe. "I've been in a
+drought ever since morning. Hi--_muchacho!--el aguardiente por aca_."
+
+"Now, what do you want to see me about?" asked Goodwin, when the
+drinks were before them.
+
+"Confound it, old man," drawled Blythe, "why do you spoil a golden
+moment like this with business? I wanted to see you--well, this has
+the preference." He gulped down his brandy, and gazed longingly into
+the empty glass.
+
+"Have another?" suggested Goodwin.
+
+"Between gentlemen," said the fallen angel, "I don't quite like your
+use of that word 'another.' It isn't quite delicate. But the concrete
+idea that the word represents is not displeasing."
+
+The glasses were refilled. Blythe sipped blissfully from his, as he
+began to enter the state of a true idealist.
+
+"I must trot along in a minute or two," hinted Goodwin. "Was there
+anything in particular?"
+
+Blythe did not reply at once.
+
+"Old Losada would make it a hot country," he remarked at length,
+"for the man who swiped that gripsack of treasury boodle, don't you
+think?"
+
+"Undoubtedly, he would," agreed Goodwin calmly, as he rose leisurely
+to his feet. "I'll be running over to the house now, old man. Mrs.
+Goodwin is alone. There was nothing important you had to say, was
+there?"
+
+"That's all," said Blythe. "Unless you wouldn't mind sending in
+another drink from the bar as you go out. Old Espada has closed my
+account to profit and loss. And pay for the lot, will you, like a
+good fellow?"
+
+"All right," said Goodwin. "_Buenas noches._"
+
+"Beelzebub" Blythe lingered over his cups, polishing his eyeglasses
+with a disreputable handkerchief.
+
+"I thought I could do it, but I couldn't," he muttered to himself
+after a time. "A gentleman can't blackmail the man that he drinks
+with."
+
+
+
+
+VIII
+
+THE ADMIRAL
+
+
+Spilled milk draws few tears from an Anchurian administration. Many
+are its lacteal sources; and the clocks' hands point forever to
+milking time. Even the rich cream skimmed from the treasury by the
+bewitched Miraflores did not cause the newly-installed patriots to
+waste time in unprofitable regrets. The government philosophically
+set about supplying the deficiency by increasing the import duties
+and by "suggesting" to wealthy private citizens that contributions
+according to their means would be considered patriotic and in
+order. Prosperity was expected to attend the reign of Losada, the
+new president. The ousted office-holders and military favourites
+organized a new "Liberal" party, and began to lay their plans for
+a re-succession. Thus the game of Anchurian politics began, like a
+Chinese comedy, to unwind slowly its serial length. Here and there
+Mirth peeps for an instant from the wings and illumines the florid
+lines.
+
+A dozen quarts of champagne in conjunction with an informal sitting
+of the president and his cabinet led to the establishment of the navy
+and the appointment of Felipe Carrera as its admiral.
+
+Next to the champagne the credit of the appointment belongs to Don
+Sabas Placido, the newly confirmed Minister of War.
+
+The president had requested a convention of his cabinet for the
+discussion of questions politic and for the transaction of certain
+routine matters of state. The session had been signally tedious; the
+business and the wine prodigiously dry. A sudden, prankish humour of
+Don Sabas, impelling him to the deed, spiced the grave affairs of
+state with a whiff of agreeable playfulness.
+
+In the dilatory order of business had come a bulletin from the
+coast department of Orilla del Mar reporting the seizure by the
+custom-house officers at the town of Coralio of the sloop _Estrella
+del Noche_ and her cargo of drygoods, patent medicines, granulated
+sugar and three-star brandy. Also six Martini rifles and a barrel of
+American whisky. Caught in the act of smuggling, the sloop with its
+cargo was now, according to law, the property of the republic.
+
+The Collector of Customs, in making his report, departed from the
+conventional forms so far as to suggest that the confiscated vessel
+be converted to the use of the government. The prize was the first
+capture to the credit of the department in ten years. The collector
+took opportunity to pat his department on the back.
+
+It often happened that government officers required transportation
+from point to point along the coast, and means were usually lacking.
+Furthermore, the sloop could be manned by a loyal crew and employed
+as a coast guard to discourage the pernicious art of smuggling. The
+collector also ventured to nominate one to whom the charge of the
+boat could be safely intrusted--a young man of Coralio, Felipe
+Carrera--not, be it understood, one of extreme wisdom, but loyal and
+the best sailor along the coast.
+
+It was upon this hint that the Minister of War acted, executing a
+rare piece of drollery that so enlivened the tedium of executive
+session.
+
+In the constitution of this small, maritime banana republic was a
+forgotten section that provided for the maintenance of a navy. This
+provision--with many other wiser ones--had lain inert since the
+establishment of the republic. Anchuria had no navy and had no use
+for one. It was characteristic of Don Sabas--a man at once merry,
+learned, whimsical and audacious--that he should have disturbed the
+dust of this musty and sleeping statute to increase the humour of the
+world by so much as a smile from his indulgent colleagues.
+
+With delightful mock seriousness the Minister of War proposed the
+creation of a navy. He argued its need and the glories it might
+achieve with such gay and witty zeal that the travesty overcame with
+its humour even the swart dignity of President Losada himself.
+
+The champagne was bubbling trickily in the veins of the mercurial
+statesmen. It was not the custom of the grave governors of Anchuria
+to enliven their sessions with a beverage so apt to cast a veil of
+disparagement over sober affairs. The wine had been a thoughtful
+compliment tendered by the agent of the Vesuvius Fruit Company as a
+token of amicable relations--and certain consummated deals--between
+that company and the republic of Anchuria.
+
+The jest was carried to its end. A formidable, official document was
+prepared, encrusted with chromatic seals and jaunty with fluttering
+ribbons, bearing the florid signatures of state. This commission
+conferred upon el Senor Don Felipe Carrera the title of Flag Admiral
+of the Republic of Anchuria. Thus within the space of a few minutes
+and the dominion of a dozen "extra dry," the country took its place
+among the naval powers of the world, and Felipe Carrera became
+entitled to a salute of nineteen guns whenever he might enter port.
+
+The southern races are lacking in that particular kind of humour
+that finds entertainment in the defects and misfortunes bestowed by
+Nature. Owing to this defect in their constitution they are not moved
+to laughter (as are their northern brothers) by the spectacle of the
+deformed, the feeble-minded or the insane.
+
+Felipe Carrera was sent upon earth with but half his wits. Therefore,
+the people of Coralio called him "_El pobrecito loco_"--"the poor
+little crazed one"--saying that God had sent but half of him to
+earth, retaining the other half.
+
+A sombre youth, glowering, and speaking only at the rarest times,
+Felipe was but negatively "loco." On shore he generally refused all
+conversation. He seemed to know that he was badly handicapped on
+land, where so many kinds of understanding are needed; but on the
+water his one talent set him equal with most men. Few sailors whom
+God had carefully and completely made could handle a sailboat as
+well. Five points nearer the wind than even the best of them he
+could sail his sloop. When the elements raged and set other men to
+cowering, the deficiencies of Felipe seemed of little importance.
+He was a perfect sailor, if an imperfect man. He owned no boat, but
+worked among the crews of the schooners and sloops that skimmed the
+coast, trading and freighting fruit out to the steamers where there
+was no harbour. It was through his famous skill and boldness on the
+sea, as well as for the pity felt for his mental imperfections, that
+he was recommended by the collector as a suitable custodian of the
+captured sloop.
+
+When the outcome of Don Sabas' little pleasantry arrived in the form
+of the imposing and preposterous commission, the collector smiled.
+He had not expected such prompt and overwhelming response to his
+recommendation. He despatched a _muchacho_ at once to fetch the
+future admiral.
+
+The collector waited in his official quarters. His office was in the
+Calle Grande, and the sea breezes hummed through its windows all day.
+The collector, in white linen and canvas shoes, philandered with
+papers on an antique desk. A parrot, perched on a pen rack, seasoned
+the official tedium with a fire of choice Castilian imprecations. Two
+rooms opened into the collector's. In one the clerical force of young
+men of variegated complexions transacted with glitter and parade
+their several duties. Through the open door of the other room could
+be seen a bronze babe, guiltless of clothing, that rollicked upon the
+floor. In a grass hammock a thin woman, tinted a pale lemon, played
+a guitar and swung contentedly in the breeze. Thus surrounded by
+the routine of his high duties and the visible tokens of agreeable
+domesticity, the collector's heart was further made happy by the
+power placed in his hands to brighten the fortunes of the "innocent"
+Felipe.
+
+Felipe came and stood before the collector. He was a lad of twenty,
+not ill-favoured in looks, but with an expression of distant and
+pondering vacuity. He wore white cotton trousers, down the seams
+of which he had sewed red stripes with some vague aim at military
+decoration. A flimsy blue shirt fell open at his throat; his feet
+were bare; he held in his hand the cheapest of straw hats from the
+States.
+
+"Senor Carrera," said the collector, gravely, producing the showy
+commission, "I have sent for you at the president's bidding. This
+document that I present to you confers upon you the title of Admiral
+of this great republic, and gives you absolute command of the naval
+forces and fleet of our country. You may think, friend Felipe, that
+we have no navy--but yes! The sloop the _Estrella del Noche_, that my
+brave men captured from the coast smugglers, is to be placed under
+your command. The boat is to be devoted to the services of your
+country. You will be ready at all times to convey officials of the
+government to points along the coast where they may be obliged to
+visit. You will also act as a coast-guard to prevent, as far as you
+may be able, the crime of smuggling. You will uphold the honour and
+prestige of your country at sea, and endeavour to place Anchuria
+among the proudest naval powers of the world. These are your
+instructions as the Minister of War desires me to convey them to you.
+_Por Dios!_ I do not know how all this is to be accomplished, for
+not one word did his letter contain in respect to a crew or to the
+expenses of this navy. Perhaps you are to provide a crew yourself,
+Senor Admiral--I do not know--but it is a very high honour that has
+descended upon you. I now hand you your commission. When you are
+ready for the boat I will give orders that she shall be made over
+into your charge. That is as far as my instructions go."
+
+Felipe took the commission that the collector handed to him. He gazed
+through the open window at the sea for a moment, with his customary
+expression of deep but vain pondering. Then he turned without having
+spoken a word, and walked swiftly away through the hot sand of the
+street.
+
+"_Pobrecito loco!_" sighed the collector; and the parrot on the pen
+racks screeched "Loco!--loco!--loco!"
+
+The next morning a strange procession filed through the streets to
+the collector's office. At its head was the admiral of the navy.
+Somewhere Felipe had raked together a pitiful semblance of a military
+uniform--a pair of red trousers, a dingy blue short jacket heavily
+ornamented with gold braid, and an old fatigue cap that must have
+been cast away by one of the British soldiers in Belize and brought
+away by Felipe on one of his coasting voyages. Buckled around his
+waist was an ancient ship's cutlass contributed to his equipment by
+Pedro Lafitte, the baker, who proudly asserted its inheritance from
+his ancestor, the illustrious buccaneer. At the admiral's heels
+tagged his newly-shipped crew--three grinning, glossy, black Caribs,
+bare to the waist, the sand spurting in showers from the spring of
+their naked feet.
+
+Briefly and with dignity Felipe demanded his vessel of the collector.
+And now a fresh honour awaited him. The collector's wife, who played
+the guitar and read novels in the hammock all day, had more than a
+little romance in her placid, yellow bosom. She had found in an old
+book an engraving of a flag that purported to be the naval flag of
+Anchuria. Perhaps it had so been designed by the founders of the
+nation; but, as no navy had ever been established, oblivion had
+claimed the flag. Laboriously with her own hands she had made a flag
+after the pattern--a red cross upon a blue-and-white ground. She
+presented it to Felipe with these words: "Brave sailor, this flag is
+of your country. Be true, and defend it with your life. Go you with
+God."
+
+For the first time since his appointment the admiral showed a flicker
+of emotion. He took the silken emblem, and passed his hand reverently
+over its surface. "I am the admiral," he said to the collector's
+lady. Being on land he could bring himself to no more exuberant
+expression of sentiment. At sea with the flag at the masthead of his
+navy, some more eloquent exposition of feelings might be forthcoming.
+
+Abruptly the admiral departed with his crew. For the next three days
+they were busy giving the _Estrella del Noche_ a new coat of white
+paint trimmed with blue. And then Felipe further adorned himself by
+fastening a handful of brilliant parrot's plumes in his cap. Again he
+tramped with his faithful crew to the collector's office and formally
+notified him that the sloop's name had been changed to _El Nacional_.
+
+During the next few months the navy had its troubles. Even an admiral
+is perplexed to know what to do without any orders. But none came.
+Neither did any salaries. _El Nacional_ swung idly at anchor.
+
+When Felipe's little store of money was exhausted he went to the
+collector and raised the question of finances.
+
+"Salaries!" exclaimed the collector, with hands raised; "_Valgame
+Dios!_ not one _centavo_ of my own pay have I received for the last
+seven months. The pay of an admiral, do you ask? _Quien sabe?_ Should
+it be less than three thousand _pesos_? _Mira!_ you will see a
+revolution in this country very soon. A good sign of it is when the
+government calls all the time for _pesos_, _pesos_, _pesos_, and pays
+none out."
+
+Felipe left the collector's office with a look almost of content
+on his sombre face. A revolution would mean fighting, and then the
+government would need his services. It was rather humiliating to be
+an admiral without anything to do, and have a hungry crew at your
+heels begging for _reales_ to buy plantains and tobacco with.
+
+When he returned to where his happy-go-lucky Caribs were waiting they
+sprang up and saluted, as he had drilled them to do.
+
+"Come, _muchachos_," said the admiral; "it seems that the government
+is poor. It has no money to give us. We will earn what we need to
+live upon. Thus will we serve our country. Soon"--his heavy eyes
+almost lighted up--"it may gladly call upon us for help."
+
+Thereafter _El Nacional_ turned out with the other coast craft and
+became a wage-earner. She worked with the lighters freighting bananas
+and oranges out to the fruit steamers that could not approach nearer
+than a mile from the shore. Surely a self-supporting navy deserves
+red letters in the budget of any nation.
+
+After earning enough at freighting to keep himself and his crew in
+provisions for a week Felipe would anchor the navy and hang about
+the little telegraph office, looking like one of the chorus of an
+insolvent comic opera troupe besieging the manager's den. A hope for
+orders from the capital was always in his heart. That his services as
+admiral had never been called into requirement hurt his pride and
+patriotism. At every call he would inquire, gravely and expectantly,
+for despatches. The operator would pretend to make a search, and then
+reply:
+
+"Not yet, it seems, _Senor el Almirante--poco tiempo!_"
+
+Outside in the shade of the lime-trees the crew chewed sugar cane or
+slumbered, well content to serve a country that was contented with so
+little service.
+
+One day in the early summer the revolution predicted by the collector
+flamed out suddenly. It had long been smouldering. At the first note
+of alarm the admiral of the navy force and fleet made all sail for a
+larger port on the coast of a neighbouring republic, where he traded
+a hastily collected cargo of fruit for its value in cartridges for
+the five Martini rifles, the only guns that the navy could boast.
+Then to the telegraph office sped the admiral. Sprawling in his
+favourite corner, in his fast-decaying uniform, with his prodigious
+sabre distributed between his red legs, he waited for the
+long-delayed, but now soon expected, orders.
+
+"Not yet, _Senor el Almirante_," the telegraph clerk would call to
+him--"_poco tiempo!_"
+
+At the answer the admiral would plump himself down with a great
+rattling of scabbard to await the infrequent tick of the little
+instrument on the table.
+
+"They will come," would be his unshaken reply; "I am the admiral."
+
+
+
+
+IX
+
+THE FLAG PARAMOUNT
+
+
+At the head of the insurgent party appeared that Hector and learned
+Theban of the southern republics, Don Sabas Placido. A traveller,
+a soldier, a poet, a scientist, a statesman and a connoisseur--the
+wonder was that he could content himself with the petty, remote life
+of his native country.
+
+"It is a whim of Placido's," said a friend who knew him well, "to
+take up political intrigue. It is not otherwise than as if he had
+come upon a new _tempo_ in music, a new bacillus in the air, a new
+scent, or rhyme, or explosive. He will squeeze this revolution dry of
+sensations, and a week afterward will forget it, skimming the seas
+of the world in his brigantine to add to his already world-famous
+collections. Collections of what? _Por Dios!_ of everything from
+postage stamps to prehistoric stone idols."
+
+But, for a mere dilettante, the aesthetic Placido seemed to be
+creating a lively row. The people admired him; they were fascinated
+by his brilliancy and flattered by his taking an interest in so
+small a thing as his native country. They rallied to the call of his
+lieutenants in the capital, where (somewhat contrary to arrangements)
+the army remained faithful to the government. There was also lively
+skirmishing in the coast towns. It was rumoured that the revolution
+was aided by the Vesuvius Fruit Company, the power that forever
+stood with chiding smile and uplifted finger to keep Anchuria in the
+class of good children. Two of its steamers, the _Traveler_ and the
+_Salvador_, were known to have conveyed insurgent troops from point
+to point along the coast.
+
+As yet there had been no actual uprising in Coralio. Military law
+prevailed, and the ferment was bottled for the time. And then came
+the word that everywhere the revolutionists were encountering defeat.
+In the capital the president's forces triumphed; and there was a
+rumour that the leaders of the revolt had been forced to fly, hotly
+pursued.
+
+In the little telegraph office at Coralio there was always a
+gathering of officials and loyal citizens, awaiting news from the
+seat of government. One morning the telegraph key began clicking,
+and presently the operator called, loudly: "One telegram for _el
+Almirante_, Don Senor Felipe Carrera!"
+
+There was a shuffling sound, a great rattling of tin scabbard, and
+the admiral, prompt at his spot of waiting, leaped across the room to
+receive it.
+
+The message was handed to him. Slowly spelling it out, he found it to
+be his first official order--thus running:
+
+
+ Proceed immediately with your vessel to mouth of Rio Ruiz;
+ transport beef and provisions to barracks at Alforan.
+
+ Martinez, General.
+
+
+Small glory, to be sure, in this, his country's first call. But it
+had called, and joy surged in the admiral's breast. He drew his
+cutlass belt to another buckle hole, roused his dozing crew, and in a
+quarter of an hour _El Nacional_ was tacking swiftly down coast in a
+stiff landward breeze.
+
+The Rio Ruiz is a small river, emptying into the sea ten miles below
+Coralio. That portion of the coast is wild and solitary. Through a
+gorge in the Cordilleras rushes the Rio Ruiz, cold and bubbling, to
+glide, at last, with breadth and leisure, through an alluvial morass
+into the sea.
+
+In two hours _El Nacional_ entered the river's mouth. The banks
+were crowded with a disposition of formidable trees. The sumptuous
+undergrowth of the tropics overflowed the land, and drowned itself in
+the fallow waters. Silently the sloop entered there, and met a deeper
+silence. Brilliant with greens and ochres and floral scarlets, the
+umbrageous mouth of the Rio Ruiz furnished no sound or movement save
+of the sea-going water as it purled against the prow of the vessel.
+Small chance there seemed of wresting beef or provisions from that
+empty solitude.
+
+The admiral decided to cast anchor, and, at the chain's rattle, the
+forest was stimulated to instant and resounding uproar. The mouth of
+the Rio Ruiz had only been taking a morning nap. Parrots and baboons
+screeched and barked in the trees; a whirring and a hissing and a
+booming marked the awakening of animal life; a dark blue bulk was
+visible for an instant, as a startled tapir fought his way through
+the vines.
+
+The navy, under orders, hung in the mouth of the little river for
+hours. The crew served the dinner of shark's fin soup, plantains,
+crab gumbo and sour wine. The admiral, with a three-foot telescope,
+closely scanned the impervious foliage fifty yards away.
+
+It was nearly sunset when a reverberating "hal-lo-o-o!" came from the
+forest to their left. It was answered; and three men, mounted upon
+mules, crashed through the tropic tangle to within a dozen yards of
+the river's bank. There they dismounted; and one, unbuckling his
+belt, struck each mule a violent blow with his sword scabbard, so
+that they, with a fling of heels, dashed back again into the forest.
+
+Those were strange-looking men to be conveying beef and provisions.
+One was a large and exceedingly active man, of striking presence. He
+was of the purest Spanish type, with curling, gray-besprinkled, dark
+hair, blue, sparkling eyes, and the pronounced air of a _caballero
+grande_. The other two were small, brown-faced men, wearing white
+military uniforms, high riding boots and swords. The clothes of all
+were drenched, bespattered and rent by the thicket. Some stress of
+circumstance must have driven them, _diable a quatre_, through flood,
+mire and jungle.
+
+"_O-he! Senor Almirante_," called the large man. "Send to us your
+boat."
+
+The dory was lowered, and Felipe, with one of the Caribs, rowed
+toward the left bank.
+
+The large man stood near the water's brink, waist deep in the curling
+vines. As he gazed upon the scarecrow figure in the stern of the dory
+a sprightly interest beamed upon his mobile face.
+
+Months of wageless and thankless service had dimmed the admiral's
+splendour. His red trousers were patched and ragged. Most of the
+bright buttons and yellow braid were gone from his jacket. The visor
+of his cap was torn, and depended almost to his eyes. The admiral's
+feet were bare.
+
+"Dear admiral," cried the large man, and his voice was like a blast
+from a horn, "I kiss your hands. I knew we could build upon your
+fidelity. You had our despatch--from General Martinez. A little
+nearer with your boat, dear Admiral. Upon these devils of shifting
+vines we stand with the smallest security."
+
+Felipe regarded him with a stolid face.
+
+"Provisions and beef for the barracks at Alforan," he quoted.
+
+"No fault of the butchers, _Almirante mio_, that the beef awaits you
+not. But you are come in time to save the cattle. Get us aboard your
+vessel, senor, at once. You first, _caballeros--a priesa!_ Come back
+for me. The boat is too small."
+
+The dory conveyed the two officers to the sloop, and returned for the
+large man.
+
+"Have you so gross a thing as food, good admiral?" he cried, when
+aboard. "And, perhaps, coffee? Beef and provisions! _Nombre de Dios!_
+a little longer and we could have eaten one of those mules that you,
+Colonel Rafael, saluted so feelingly with your sword scabbard at
+parting. Let us have food; and then we will sail--for the barracks at
+Alforan--no?"
+
+The Caribs prepared a meal, to which the three passengers of _El
+Nacional_ set themselves with famished delight. About sunset, as was
+its custom, the breeze veered and swept back from the mountains, cool
+and steady, bringing a taste of the stagnant lagoons and mangrove
+swamps that guttered the lowlands. The mainsail of the sloop was
+hoisted and swelled to it, and at that moment they heard shouts and a
+waxing clamour from the bosky profundities of the shore.
+
+"The butchers, my dear admiral," said the large man, smiling, "too
+late for the slaughter."
+
+Further than his orders to his crew, the admiral was saying nothing.
+The topsail and jib were spread, and the sloop glided out of the
+estuary. The large man and his companions had bestowed themselves
+with what comfort they could about the bare deck. Belike, the thing
+big in their minds had been their departure from that critical shore;
+and now that the hazard was so far reduced their thoughts were loosed
+to the consideration of further deliverance. But when they saw the
+sloop turn and fly up coast again they relaxed, satisfied with the
+course the admiral had taken.
+
+The large man sat at ease, his spirited blue eye engaged in the
+contemplation of the navy's commander. He was trying to estimate this
+sombre and fantastic lad, whose impenetrable stolidity puzzled him.
+Himself a fugitive, his life sought, and chafing under the smart
+of defeat and failure, it was characteristic of him to transfer
+instantly his interest to the study of a thing new to him. It
+was like him, too, to have conceived and risked all upon this
+last desperate and madcap scheme--this message to a poor, crazed
+_fanatico_ cruising about with his grotesque uniform and his farcical
+title. But his companions had been at their wits' end; escape had
+seemed incredible; and now he was pleased with the success of the
+plan they had called crack-brained and precarious.
+
+The brief, tropic twilight seemed to slide swiftly into the pearly
+splendour of a moonlit night. And now the lights of Coralio appeared,
+distributed against the darkening shore to their right. The admiral
+stood, silent, at the tiller; the Caribs, like black panthers, held
+the sheets, leaping noiselessly at his short commands. The three
+passengers were watching intently the sea before them, and when at
+length they came in sight of the bulk of a steamer lying a mile out
+from the town, with her lights radiating deep into the water, they
+held a sudden voluble and close-headed converse. The sloop was
+speeding as if to strike midway between ship and shore.
+
+The large man suddenly separated from his companions and approached
+the scarecrow at the helm.
+
+"My dear admiral," he said, "the government has been exceedingly
+remiss. I feel all the shame for it that only its ignorance of your
+devoted service has prevented it from sustaining. An inexcusable
+oversight has been made. A vessel, a uniform and a crew worthy of
+your fidelity shall be furnished you. But just now, dear admiral,
+there is business of moment afoot. The steamer lying there is the
+_Salvador_. I and my friends desire to be conveyed to her, where we
+are sent on the government's business. Do us the favour to shape your
+course accordingly."
+
+Without replying, the admiral gave a sharp command, and put the
+tiller hard to port. _El Nacional_ swerved, and headed straight as an
+arrow's course for the shore.
+
+"Do me the favour," said the large man, a trifle restively, "to
+acknowledge, at least, that you catch the sound of my words." It
+was possible that the fellow might be lacking in senses as well as
+intellect.
+
+The admiral emitted a croaking, harsh laugh, and spake.
+
+"They will stand you," he said, "with your face to a wall and shoot
+you dead. That is the way they kill traitors. I knew you when you
+stepped into my boat. I have seen your picture in a book. You are
+Sabas Placido, traitor to your country. With your face to a wall. So,
+you will die. I am the admiral, and I will take you to them. With
+your face to a wall. Yes."
+
+Don Sabas half turned and waved his hand, with a ringing laugh,
+toward his fellow fugitives. "To you, _caballeros_, I have related
+the history of that session when we issued that O! so ridiculous
+commission. Of a truth our jest has been turned against us. Behold
+the Frankenstein's monster we have created!"
+
+Don Sabas glanced toward the shore. The lights of Coralio were
+drawing near. He could see the beach, the warehouse of the _Bodega
+Nacional_, the long, low _cuartel_ occupied by the soldiers, and,
+behind that, gleaming in the moonlight, a stretch of high adobe wall.
+He had seen men stood with their faces to that wall and shot dead.
+
+Again he addressed the extravagant figure at the helm.
+
+"It is true," he said, "that I am fleeing the country. But, receive
+the assurance that I care very little for that. Courts and camps
+everywhere are open to Sabas Placido. _Vaya!_ what is this molehill
+of a republic--this pig's head of a country--to a man like me? I am a
+_paisano_ of everywhere. In Rome, in London, in Paris, in Vienna, you
+will hear them say: 'Welcome back, Don Sabas.' Come!--_tonto_--baboon
+of a boy--admiral, whatever you call yourself, turn your boat. Put us
+on board the _Salvador_, and here is your pay--five hundred _pesos_
+in money of the _Estados Unidos_--more than your lying government
+will pay you in twenty years."
+
+Don Sabas pressed a plump purse against the youth's hand. The admiral
+gave no heed to the words or the movement. Braced against the helm,
+he was holding the sloop dead on her shoreward course. His dull face
+was lit almost to intelligence by some inward conceit that seemed to
+afford him joy, and found utterance in another parrot-like cackle.
+
+"That is why they do it," he said--"so that you will not see the
+guns. They fire--oom!--and you fall dead. With your face to the wall.
+Yes."
+
+The admiral called a sudden order to his crew. The lithe, silent
+Caribs made fast the sheets they held, and slipped down the hatchway
+into the hold of the sloop. When the last one had disappeared, Don
+Sabas, like a big, brown leopard, leaped forward, closed and fastened
+the hatch and stood, smiling.
+
+"No rifles, if you please, dear admiral," he said. "It was a whimsey
+of mine once to compile a dictionary of the Carib _lengua_. So, I
+understood your order. Perhaps now you will--"
+
+He cut short his words, for he heard the dull "swish" of iron
+scraping along tin. The admiral had drawn the cutlass of Pedro
+Lafitte, and was darting upon him. The blade descended, and it was
+only by a display of surprising agility that the large man escaped,
+with only a bruised shoulder, the glancing weapon. He was drawing his
+pistol as he sprang, and the next instant he shot the admiral down.
+
+Don Sabas stooped over him, and rose again.
+
+"In the heart," he said briefly. "_Senores_, the navy is abolished."
+
+Colonel Rafael sprang to the helm, and the other officer hastened to
+loose the mainsail sheets. The boom swung round; _El Nacional_ veered
+and began to tack industriously for the _Salvador_.
+
+"Strike that flag, senor," called Colonel Rafael. "Our friends on the
+steamer will wonder why we are sailing under it."
+
+"Well said," cried Don Sabas. Advancing to the mast he lowered the
+flag to the deck, where lay its too loyal supporter. Thus ended the
+Minister of War's little piece of after-dinner drollery, and by the
+same hand that began it.
+
+Suddenly Don Sabas gave a great cry of joy, and ran down the slanting
+deck to the side of Colonel Rafael. Across his arm he carried the
+flag of the extinguished navy.
+
+"_Mire! mire! senor._ Ah, _Dios!_ Already can I hear that great bear
+of an _Oestreicher_ shout, _'Du hast mein herz gebrochen!' Mire!_
+Of my friend, Herr Grunitz, of Vienna, you have heard me relate.
+That man has travelled to Ceylon for an orchid--to Patagonia for a
+headdress--to Benares for a slipper--to Mozambique for a spearhead
+to add to his famous collections. Thou knowest, also, _amigo_ Rafael,
+that I have been a gatherer of curios. My collection of battle flags
+of the world's navies was the most complete in existence until last
+year. Then Herr Grunitz secured two, O! such rare specimens. One of a
+Barbary state, and one of the Makarooroos, a tribe on the west coast
+of Africa. I have not those, but they can be procured. But this flag,
+senor--do you know what it is? Name of God! do you know? See that
+red cross upon the blue and white ground! You never saw it before?
+_Seguramente no._ It is the naval flag of your country. _Mire!_
+This rotten tub we stand upon is its navy--that dead cockatoo lying
+there was its commander--that stroke of cutlass and single pistol
+shot a sea battle. All a piece of absurd foolery, I grant you--but
+authentic. There has never been another flag like this, and there
+never will be another. No. It is unique in the whole world. Yes.
+Think of what that means to a collector of flags! Do you know,
+_Coronel mio_, how many golden crowns Herr Grunitz would give for
+this flag? Ten thousand, likely. Well, a hundred thousand would not
+buy it. Beautiful flag! Only flag! Little devil of a most heaven-born
+flag! _O-he!_ old grumbler beyond the ocean. Wait till Don Sabas
+comes again to the Koenigin Strasse. He will let you kneel and touch
+the folds of it with one finger. _O-he!_ old spectacled ransacker of
+the world!"
+
+Forgotten was the impotent revolution, the danger, the loss, the
+gall of defeat. Possessed solely by the inordinate and unparalleled
+passion of the collector, he strode up and down the little deck,
+clasping to his breast with one hand the paragon of a flag. He
+snapped his fingers triumphantly toward the east. He shouted the
+paean to his prize in trumpet tones, as though he would make old
+Grunitz hear in his musty den beyond the sea.
+
+They were waiting, on the _Salvador_, to welcome them. The sloop came
+close alongside the steamer where her sides were sliced almost to the
+lower deck for the loading of fruit. The sailors of the _Salvador_
+grappled and held her there.
+
+Captain McLeod leaned over the side.
+
+"Well, senor, the jig is up, I'm told."
+
+"The jig is up?" Don Sabas looked perplexed for a moment. "That
+revolution--ah, yes!" With a shrug of his shoulders he dismissed the
+matter.
+
+The captain learned of the escape and the imprisoned crew.
+
+"Caribs?" he said; "no harm in them." He slipped down into the sloop
+and kicked loose the hasp of the hatch. The black fellows came
+tumbling up, sweating but grinning.
+
+"Hey! black boys!" said the captain, in a dialect of his own; "you
+sabe, catchy boat and vamos back same place quick."
+
+They saw him point to themselves, the sloop and Coralio. "Yas, yas!"
+they cried, with broader grins and many nods.
+
+The four--Don Sabas, the two officers and the captain--moved to quit
+the sloop. Don Sabas lagged a little behind, looking at the still
+form of the late admiral, sprawled in his paltry trappings.
+
+"_Pobrecito loco_," he said softly.
+
+He was a brilliant cosmopolite and a _cognoscente_ of high rank; but,
+after all, he was of the same race and blood and instinct as this
+people. Even as the simple _paisanos_ of Coralio had said it, so said
+Don Sabas. Without a smile, he looked, and said, "The poor little
+crazed one!"
+
+Stooping he raised the limp shoulders, drew the priceless and
+induplicable flag under them and over the breast, pinning it there
+with the diamond star of the Order of San Carlos that he took from
+the collar of his own coat.
+
+He followed after the others, and stood with them upon the deck of
+the _Salvador_. The sailors that steadied _El Nacional_ shoved her
+off. The jabbering Caribs hauled away at the rigging; the sloop
+headed for the shore.
+
+And Herr Grunitz's collection of naval flags was still the finest in
+the world.
+
+
+
+
+X
+
+THE SHAMROCK AND THE PALM
+
+
+One night when there was no breeze, and Coralio seemed closer than
+ever to the gratings of Avernus, five men were grouped about the door
+of the photograph establishment of Keogh and Clancy. Thus, in all the
+scorched and exotic places of the earth, Caucasians meet when the
+day's work is done to preserve the fulness of their heritage by the
+aspersion of alien things.
+
+Johnny Atwood lay stretched upon the grass in the undress uniform
+of a Carib, and prated feebly of cool water to be had in the
+cucumber-wood pumps of Dalesburg. Dr. Gregg, through the prestige of
+his whiskers and as a bribe against the relation of his imminent
+professional tales, was conceded the hammock that was swung between
+the door jamb and a calabash-tree. Keogh had moved out upon the grass
+a little table that held the instrument for burnishing completed
+photographs. He was the only busy one of the group. Industriously
+from between the cylinders of the burnisher rolled the finished
+depictments of Coralio's citizens. Blanchard, the French mining
+engineer, in his cool linen viewed the smoke of his cigarette through
+his calm glasses, impervious to the heat. Clancy sat on the steps,
+smoking his short pipe. His mood was the gossip's; the others were
+reduced, by the humidity, to the state of disability desirable in an
+audience.
+
+Clancy was an American with an Irish diathesis and cosmopolitan
+proclivities. Many businesses had claimed him, but not for long.
+The roadster's blood was in his veins. The voice of the tintype was
+but one of the many callings that had wooed him upon so many roads.
+Sometimes he could be persuaded to oral construction of his voyages
+into the informal and egregious. To-night there were symptoms of
+divulgement in him.
+
+"'Tis elegant weather for filibusterin'," he volunteered. "It reminds
+me of the time I struggled to liberate a nation from the poisonous
+breath of a tyrant's clutch. 'Twas hard work. 'Tis strainin' to the
+back and makes corns on the hands."
+
+"I didn't know you had ever lent your sword to an oppressed people,"
+murmured Atwood, from the grass.
+
+"I did," said Clancy; "and they turned it into a ploughshare."
+
+"What country was so fortunate as to secure your aid?" airily
+inquired Blanchard.
+
+"Where's Kamchatka?" asked Clancy, with seeming irrelevance.
+
+"Why, off Siberia somewhere in the Arctic regions," somebody
+answered, doubtfully.
+
+"I thought that was the cold one," said Clancy, with a satisfied nod.
+"I'm always gettin' the two names mixed. 'Twas Guatemala, then--the
+hot one--I've been filibusterin' with. Ye'll find that country on the
+map. 'Tis in the district known as the tropics. By the foresight of
+Providence, it lies on the coast so the geography man could run the
+names of the towns off into the water. They're an inch long, small
+type, composed of Spanish dialects, and, 'tis my opinion, of the same
+system of syntax that blew up the _Maine_. Yes, 'twas that country I
+sailed against, single-handed, and endeavoured to liberate it from
+a tyrannical government with a single-barreled pickaxe, unloaded
+at that. Ye don't understand, of course. 'Tis a statement demandin'
+elucidation and apologies.
+
+"'Twas in New Orleans one morning about the first of June; I was
+standin' down on the wharf, lookin' about at the ships in the river.
+There was a little steamer moored right opposite me that seemed about
+ready to sail. The funnels of it were throwin' out smoke, and a gang
+of roustabouts were carryin' aboard a pile of boxes that was stacked
+up on the wharf. The boxes were about two feet square, and somethin'
+like four feet long, and they seemed to be pretty heavy.
+
+"I walked over, careless, to the stack of boxes. I saw one of them
+had been broken in handlin'. 'Twas curiosity made me pull up the
+loose top and look inside. The box was packed full of Winchester
+rifles. 'So, so,' says I to myself; 'somebody's gettin' a twist on
+the neutrality laws. Somebody's aidin' with munitions of war. I
+wonder where the popguns are goin'?'
+
+"I heard somebody cough, and I turned around. There stood a
+little, round, fat man with a brown face and white clothes, a
+first-class-looking little man, with a four-karat diamond on his
+finger and his eye full of interrogations and respects. I judged
+he was a kind of foreigner--may be from Russia or Japan or the
+archipelagoes.
+
+"'Hist!' says the round man, full of concealments and confidences.
+'Will the senor respect the discoveryments he has made, that the mans
+on the ship shall not be acquaint? The senor will be a gentleman that
+shall not expose one thing that by accident occur.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I--for I judged him to be a kind of
+Frenchman--'receive my most exasperated assurances that your secret
+is safe with James Clancy. Furthermore, I will go so far as to
+remark, Veev la Liberty--veev it good and strong. Whenever you hear
+of a Clancy obstructin' the abolishment of existin' governments you
+may notify me by return mail.'
+
+"'The senor is good,' says the dark, fat man, smilin' under his
+black mustache. 'Wish you to come aboard my ship and drink of wine a
+glass.'
+
+"Bein' a Clancy, in two minutes me and the foreigner man were seated
+at a table in the cabin of the steamer, with a bottle between us. I
+could hear the heavy boxes bein' dumped into the hold. I judged that
+cargo must consist of at least 2,000 Winchesters. Me and the brown
+man drank the bottle of stuff, and he called the steward to bring
+another. When you amalgamate a Clancy with the contents of a bottle
+you practically instigate secession. I had heard a good deal about
+these revolutions in them tropical localities, and I begun to want a
+hand in it.
+
+"'You goin' to stir things up in your country, ain't you, monseer?'
+says I, with a wink to let him know I was on.
+
+"'Yes, yes,' said the little man, pounding his fist on the table.
+'A change of the greatest will occur. Too long have the people been
+oppressed with the promises and the never-to-happen things to become.
+The great work it shall be carry on. Yes. Our forces shall in the
+capital city strike of the soonest. _Carrambos!_'
+
+"'_Carrambos_ is the word,' says I, beginning to invest myself with
+enthusiasm and more wine, 'likewise veeva, as I said before. May the
+shamrock of old--I mean the banana-vine or the pie-plant, or whatever
+the imperial emblem may be of your down-trodden country, wave
+forever.'
+
+"'A thousand thank-yous,' says the round man, 'for your emission of
+amicable utterances. What our cause needs of the very most is mans
+who will the work do, to lift it along. Oh, for one thousands strong,
+good mans to aid the General De Vega that he shall to his country
+bring those success and glory! It is hard--oh, so hard to find good
+mans to help in the work.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I, leanin' over the table and graspin' his hand,
+'I don't know where your country is, but me heart bleeds for it. The
+heart of a Clancy was never deaf to the sight of an oppressed people.
+The family is filibusterers by birth, and foreigners by trade. If you
+can use James Clancy's arms and his blood in denudin' your shores of
+the tyrant's yoke they're yours to command.'
+
+"General De Vega was overcome with joy to confiscate my condolence of
+his conspiracies and predicaments. He tried to embrace me across the
+table, but his fatness, and the wine that had been in the bottles,
+prevented. Thus was I welcomed into the ranks of filibustery. Then
+the general man told me his country had the name of Guatemala, and
+was the greatest nation laved by any ocean whatever anywhere. He
+looked at me with tears in his eyes, and from time to time he would
+emit the remark, 'Ah! big, strong, brave mans! That is what my
+country need.'
+
+"General De Vega, as was the name by which he denounced himself,
+brought out a document for me to sign, which I did, makin' a fine
+flourish and curlycue with the tail of the 'y.'
+
+"'Your passage-money,' says the general, business-like, 'shall from
+your pay be deduct.'
+
+"'Twill not,' says I, haughty. 'I'll pay my own passage.' A hundred
+and eighty dollars I had in my inside pocket, and 'twas no common
+filibuster I was goin' to be, filibusterin' for me board and clothes.
+
+"The steamer was to sail in two hours, and I went ashore to get some
+things together I'd need. When I came aboard I showed the general
+with pride the outfit. 'Twas a fine Chinchilla overcoat, Arctic
+overshoes, fur cap and earmuffs, with elegant fleece-lined gloves and
+woolen muffler.
+
+"'_Carrambos!_' says the little general. 'What clothes are these that
+shall go to the tropic?' And then the little spalpeen laughs, and he
+calls the captain, and the captain calls the purser, and they pipe up
+the chief engineer, and the whole gang leans against the cabin and
+laughs at Clancy's wardrobe for Guatemala.
+
+"I reflects a bit, serious, and asks the general again to denominate
+the terms by which his country is called. He tells me, and I see then
+that 'twas the t'other one, Kamchatka, I had in mind. Since then I've
+had difficulty in separatin' the two nations in name, climate and
+geographic disposition.
+
+"I paid my passage--twenty-four dollars, first cabin--and ate at
+table with the officer crowd. Down on the lower deck was a gang of
+second-class passengers, about forty of them, seemin' to be Dagoes
+and the like. I wondered what so many of them were goin' along for.
+
+"Well, then, in three days we sailed alongside that Guatemala. 'Twas
+a blue country, and not yellow as 'tis miscolored on the map. We
+landed at a town on the coast, where a train of cars was waitin' for
+us on a dinky little railroad. The boxes on the steamer were brought
+ashore and loaded on the cars. The gang of Dagoes got aboard, too,
+the general and me in the front car. Yes, me and General De Vega
+headed the revolution, as it pulled out of the seaport town. That
+train travelled about as fast as a policeman goin' to a riot. It
+penetrated the most conspicuous lot of fuzzy scenery ever seen
+outside a geography. We run some forty miles in seven hours, and the
+train stopped. There was no more railroad. 'Twas a sort of camp in a
+damp gorge full of wildness and melancholies. They was gradin' and
+choppin' out the forests ahead to continue the road. 'Here,' says I
+to myself, 'is the romantic haunt of the revolutionists. Here will
+Clancy, by the virtue that is in a superior race and the inculcation
+of Fenian tactics, strike a tremendous blow for liberty.'
+
+"They unloaded the boxes from the train and begun to knock the tops
+off. From the first one that was open I saw General De Vega take the
+Winchester rifles and pass them around to a squad of morbid soldiery.
+The other boxes was opened next, and, believe me or not, divil
+another gun was to be seen. Every other box in the load was full of
+pickaxes and spades.
+
+"And then--sorrow be upon them tropics--the proud Clancy and the
+dishonoured Dagoes, each one of them, had to shoulder a pick or a
+spade, and march away to work on that dirty little railroad. Yes;
+'twas that the Dagoes shipped for, and 'twas that the filibusterin'
+Clancy signed for, though unbeknownst to himself at the time. In
+after days I found out about it. It seems 'twas hard to get hands
+to work on that road. The intelligent natives of the country was
+too lazy to work. Indeed, the saints know, 'twas unnecessary. By
+stretchin' out one hand, they could seize the most delicate and
+costly fruits of the earth, and, by stretchin' out the other, they
+could sleep for days at a time without hearin' a seven-o'clock
+whistle or the footsteps of the rent man upon the stairs. So,
+regular, the steamers travelled to the United States to seduce
+labour. Usually the imported spade-slingers died in two or three
+months from eatin' the over-ripe water and breathin' the violent
+tropical scenery. Wherefore they made them sign contracts for a year,
+when they hired them, and put an armed guard over the poor divils to
+keep them from runnin' away.
+
+"'Twas thus I was double-crossed by the tropics through a family
+failin' of goin' out of the way to hunt disturbances.
+
+"They gave me a pick, and I took it, meditatin' an insurrection on
+the spot; but there was the guards handlin' the Winchesters careless,
+and I come to the conclusion that discretion was the best part of
+filibusterin'. There was about a hundred of us in the gang startin'
+out to work, and the word was given to move. I steps out of the ranks
+and goes up to that General De Vega man, who was smokin' a cigar and
+gazin' upon the scene with satisfactions and glory. He smiles at me
+polite and devilish. 'Plenty work,' says he, 'for big, strong mans in
+Guatemala. Yes. T'irty dollars in the month. Good pay. Ah, yes. You
+strong, brave man. Bimeby we push those railroad in the capital very
+quick. They want you go work now. _Adios_, strong mans.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I, lingerin', 'will you tell a poor little Irishman
+this: When I set foot on your cockroachy steamer, and breathed
+liberal and revolutionary sentiments into your sour wine, did you
+think I was conspirin' to sling a pick on your contemptuous little
+railroad? And when you answered me with patriotic recitations,
+humping up the star-spangled cause of liberty, did you have
+meditations of reducin' me to the ranks of the stump-grubbin' Dagoes
+in the chain-gangs of your vile and grovelin' country?'
+
+"The general man expanded his rotundity and laughed considerable.
+Yes, he laughed very long and loud, and I, Clancy, stood and waited.
+
+"'Comical mans!' he shouts, at last. 'So you will kill me from the
+laughing. Yes; it is hard to find the brave, strong mans to aid my
+country. Revolutions? Did I speak of r-r-revolutions? Not one word.
+I say, big, strong mans is need in Guatemala. So. The mistake is of
+you. You have looked in those one box containing those gun for the
+guard. You think all boxes is contain gun? No.
+
+"'There is not war in Guatemala. But work? Yes. Good. T'irty dollar
+in the month. You shall shoulder one pickaxe, senor, and dig for the
+liberty and prosperity of Guatemala. Off to your work. The guard
+waits for you.'
+
+"'Little, fat, poodle dog of a brown man,' says I, quiet, but full of
+indignations and discomforts, 'things shall happen to you. Maybe not
+right away, but as soon as J. Clancy can formulate somethin' in the
+way of repartee.'
+
+"The boss of the gang orders us to work. I tramps off with the
+Dagoes, and I hears the distinguished patriot and kidnapper laughin'
+hearty as we go.
+
+"'Tis a sorrowful fact, for eight weeks I built railroads for that
+misbehavin' country. I filibustered twelve hours a day with a heavy
+pick and a spade, choppin' away the luxurious landscape that grew
+upon the right of way. We worked in swamps that smelled like there
+was a leak in the gas mains, trampin' down a fine assortment of the
+most expensive hothouse plants and vegetables. The scene was tropical
+beyond the wildest imagination of the geography man. The trees was
+all sky-scrapers; the underbrush was full of needles and pins;
+there was monkeys jumpin' around and crocodiles and pink-tailed
+mockin'-birds, and ye stood knee-deep in the rotten water and
+grabbled roots for the liberation of Guatemala. Of nights we would
+build smudges in camp to discourage the mosquitoes, and sit in the
+smoke, with the guards pacin' all around us. There was two hundred
+men workin' on the road--mostly Dagoes, nigger-men, Spanish-men and
+Swedes. Three or four were Irish.
+
+"One old man named Halloran--a man of Hibernian entitlements and
+discretions, explained it to me. He had been workin' on the road a
+year. Most of them died in less than six months. He was dried up to
+gristle and bone, and shook with chills every third night.
+
+"'When you first come,' says he, 'ye think ye'll leave right away.
+But they hold out your first month's pay for your passage over, and
+by that time the tropics has its grip on ye. Ye're surrounded by a
+ragin' forest full of disreputable beasts--lions and baboons and
+anacondas--waitin' to devour ye. The sun strikes ye hard, and melts
+the marrow in your bones. Ye get similar to the lettuce-eaters the
+poetry-book speaks about. Ye forget the elevated sintiments of life,
+such as patriotism, revenge, disturbances of the peace and the dacint
+love of a clane shirt. Ye do your work, and ye swallow the kerosene
+ile and rubber pipestems dished up to ye by the Dago cook for food.
+Ye light your pipeful, and say to yoursilf, "Nixt week I'll break
+away," and ye go to sleep and call yersilf a liar, for ye know ye'll
+never do it.'
+
+"'Who is this general man,' asks I, 'that calls himself De Vega?'
+
+"''Tis the man,' says Halloran, 'who is tryin' to complete
+the finishin' of the railroad. 'Twas the project of a private
+corporation, but it busted, and then the government took it up. De
+Vegy is a big politician, and wants to be prisident. The people want
+the railroad completed, as they're taxed mighty on account of it. The
+De Vegy man is pushin' it along as a campaign move.'
+
+"''Tis not my way,' says I, 'to make threats against any man, but
+there's an account to be settled between the railroad man and James
+O'Dowd Clancy.'
+
+"''Twas that way I thought, mesilf, at first,' Halloran says, with a
+big sigh, 'until I got to be a lettuce-eater. The fault's wid these
+tropics. They rejuices a man's system. 'Tis a land, as the poet says,
+"Where it always seems to be after dinner." I does me work and smokes
+me pipe and sleeps. There's little else in life, anyway. Ye'll get
+that way yersilf, mighty soon. Don't be harbourin' any sintiments at
+all, Clancy.'
+
+"'I can't help it,' says I; 'I'm full of 'em. I enlisted in the
+revolutionary army of this dark country in good faith to fight for
+its liberty, honours and silver candlesticks; instead of which I
+am set to amputatin' its scenery and grubbin' its roots. 'Tis the
+general man will have to pay for it.'
+
+"Two months I worked on that railroad before I found a chance to get
+away. One day a gang of us was sent back to the end of the completed
+line to fetch some picks that had been sent down to Port Barrios to
+be sharpened. They were brought on a hand-car, and I noticed, when I
+started away, that the car was left there on the track.
+
+"That night, about twelve, I woke up Halloran and told him my scheme.
+
+"'Run away?' says Halloran. 'Good Lord, Clancy, do ye mean it? Why, I
+ain't got the nerve. It's too chilly, and I ain't slept enough. Run
+away? I told you, Clancy, I've eat the lettuce. I've lost my grip.
+'Tis the tropics that's done it. 'Tis like the poet says: "Forgotten
+are our friends that we have left behind; in the hollow lettuce-land
+we will live and lay reclined." You better go on, Clancy. I'll stay,
+I guess. It's too early and cold, and I'm sleepy.'
+
+"So I had to leave Halloran. I dressed quiet, and slipped out of the
+tent we were in. When the guard came along I knocked him over, like
+a ninepin, with a green cocoanut I had, and made for the railroad.
+I got on that hand-car and made it fly. 'Twas yet a while before
+daybreak when I saw the lights of Port Barrios about a mile away. I
+stopped the hand-car there and walked to the town. I stepped inside
+the corporations of that town with care and hesitations. I was not
+afraid of the army of Guatemala, but me soul quaked at the prospect
+of a hand-to-hand struggle with its employment bureau. 'Tis a country
+that hires its help easy and keeps 'em long. Sure I can fancy Missis
+America and Missis Guatemala passin' a bit of gossip some fine, still
+night across the mountains. 'Oh, dear,' says Missis America, 'and
+it's a lot of trouble I'm havin' ag'in with the help, senora, ma'am.'
+'Laws, now!' says Missis Guatemala, 'you don't say so, ma'am! Now,
+mine never think of leavin' me--te-he! ma'am,' snickers Missis
+Guatemala.
+
+"I was wonderin' how I was goin' to move away from them tropics
+without bein' hired again. Dark as it was, I could see a steamer
+ridin' in the harbour, with smoke emergin' from her stacks. I turned
+down a little grass street that run down to the water. On the beach I
+found a little brown nigger-man just about to shove off in a skiff.
+
+"'Hold on, Sambo,' says I, 'savve English?'
+
+"'Heap plenty, yes,' says he, with a pleasant grin.
+
+"'What steamer is that?' I asks him, 'and where is it going? And
+what's the news, and the good word and the time of day?'
+
+"'That steamer the _Conchita_,' said the brown man, affable and easy,
+rollin' a cigarette. 'Him come from New Orleans for load banana. Him
+got load last night. I think him sail in one, two hour. Verree nice
+day we shall be goin' have. You hear some talkee 'bout big battle,
+maybe so? You think catchee General De Vega, senor? Yes? No?'
+
+"'How's that, Sambo?' says I. 'Big battle? What battle? Who wants
+catchee General De Vega? I've been up at my old gold mines in the
+interior for a couple of months, and haven't heard any news.'
+
+"'Oh,' says the nigger-man, proud to speak the English, 'verree great
+revolution in Guatemala one week ago. General De Vega, him try be
+president. Him raise armee--one--five--ten thousand mans for fight
+at the government. Those one government send five--forty--hundred
+thousand soldier to suppress revolution. They fight big battle
+yesterday at Lomagrande--that about nineteen or fifty mile in the
+mountain. That government soldier wheep General De Vega--oh, most
+bad. Five hundred--nine hundred--two thousand of his mans is kill.
+That revolution is smash suppress--bust--very quick. General De Vega,
+him r-r-run away fast on one big mule. Yes, _carrambos!_ The general,
+him r-r-run away, and his armee is kill. That government soldier,
+they try find General De Vega verree much. They want catchee him for
+shoot. You think they catchee that general, senor?'
+
+"'Saints grant it!' says I. ''Twould be the judgment of Providence
+for settin' the warlike talent of a Clancy to gradin' the tropics
+with a pick and shovel. But 'tis not so much a question of
+insurrections now, me little man, as 'tis of the hired-man problem.
+'Tis anxious I am to resign a situation of responsibility and trust
+with the white wings department of your great and degraded country.
+Row me in your little boat out to that steamer, and I'll give ye five
+dollars--sinker pacers--sinker pacers,' says I, reducin' the offer to
+the language and denomination of the tropic dialects.
+
+"'_Cinco pesos_,' repeats the little man. 'Five dollee, you give?'
+
+"'Twas not such a bad little man. He had hesitations at first, sayin'
+that passengers leavin' the country had to have papers and passports,
+but at last he took me out alongside the steamer.
+
+"Day was just breakin' as we struck her, and there wasn't a soul to
+be seen on board. The water was very still, and the nigger-man gave
+me a lift from the boat, and I climbed onto the steamer where her
+side was sliced to the deck for loadin' fruit. The hatches was open,
+and I looked down and saw the cargo of bananas that filled the hold
+to within six feet of the top. I thinks to myself, 'Clancy, you
+better go as a stowaway. It's safer. The steamer men might hand you
+back to the employment bureau. The tropic'll get you, Clancy, if you
+don't watch out.'
+
+"So I jumps down easy among the bananas, and digs out a hole to hide
+in among the bunches. In an hour or so I could hear the engines
+goin', and feel the steamer rockin', and I knew we were off to sea.
+They left the hatches open for ventilation, and pretty soon it
+was light enough in the hold to see fairly well. I got to feelin'
+a bit hungry, and thought I'd have a light fruit lunch, by way
+of refreshment. I creeped out of the hole I'd made and stood up
+straight. Just then I saw another man crawl up about ten feet away
+and reach out and skin a banana and stuff it into his mouth. 'Twas
+a dirty man, black-faced and ragged and disgraceful of aspect. Yes,
+the man was a ringer for the pictures of the fat Weary Willie in the
+funny papers. I looked again, and saw it was my general man--De Vega,
+the great revolutionist, mule-rider and pickaxe importer. When he saw
+me the general hesitated with his mouth filled with banana and his
+eyes the size of cocoanuts.
+
+"'Hist!' I says. 'Not a word, or they'll put us off and make us walk.
+"Veev la Liberty!"' I adds, copperin' the sentiment by shovin' a
+banana into the source of it. I was certain the general wouldn't
+recognize me. The nefarious work of the tropics had left me lookin'
+different. There was half an inch of roan whiskers coverin' me face,
+and me costume was a pair of blue overalls and a red shirt.
+
+"'How you come in the ship, senor?' asked the general as soon as he
+could speak.
+
+"'By the back door--whist!' says I. ''Twas a glorious blow for
+liberty we struck,' I continues; 'but we was overpowered by numbers.
+Let us accept our defeat like brave men and eat another banana.'
+
+"'Were you in the cause of liberty fightin', senor?' says the
+general, sheddin' tears on the cargo.
+
+"'To the last,' says I. ''Twas I led the last desperate charge
+against the minions of the tyrant. But it made them mad, and we was
+forced to retreat. 'Twas I, general, procured the mule upon which
+you escaped. Could you give that ripe bunch a little boost this way,
+general? It's a bit out of my reach. Thanks.'
+
+"'Say you so, brave patriot?' said the general, again weepin'. 'Ah,
+_Dios!_ And I have not the means to reward your devotion. Barely did
+I my life bring away. _Carrambos!_ what a devil's animal was that
+mule, senor! Like ships in one storm was I dashed about. The skin
+on myself was ripped away with the thorns and vines. Upon the bark
+of a hundred trees did that beast of the infernal bump, and cause
+outrage to the legs of mine. In the night to Port Barrios I came. I
+dispossess myself of that mountain of mule and hasten along the water
+shore. I find a little boat to be tied. I launch myself and row to
+the steamer. I cannot see any mans on board, so I climbed one rope
+which hang at the side. I then myself hide in the bananas. Surely, I
+say, if the ship captains view me, they shall throw me again to those
+Guatemala. Those things are not good. Guatemala will shoot General
+De Vega. Therefore, I am hide and remain silent. Life itself is
+glorious. Liberty, it is pretty good; but so good as life I do not
+think.'
+
+"Three days, as I said, was the trip to New Orleans. The general man
+and me got to be cronies of the deepest dye. Bananas we ate until
+they were distasteful to the sight and an eyesore to the palate, but
+to bananas alone was the bill of fare reduced. At night I crawls out,
+careful, on the lower deck, and gets a bucket of fresh water.
+
+"That General De Vega was a man inhabited by an engorgement of words
+and sentences. He added to the monotony of the voyage by divestin'
+himself of conversation. He believed I was a revolutionist of his own
+party, there bein', as he told me, a good many Americans and other
+foreigners in its ranks. 'Twas a braggart and a conceited little
+gabbler it was, though he considered himself a hero. 'Twas on himself
+he wasted all his regrets at the failin' of his plot. Not a word did
+the little balloon have to say about the other misbehavin' idiots
+that had been shot, or run themselves to death in his revolution.
+
+"The second day out he was feelin' pretty braggy and uppish for a
+stowed-away conspirator that owed his existence to a mule and stolen
+bananas. He was tellin' me about the great railroad he had been
+buildin', and he relates what he calls a comic incident about a fool
+Irishman he inveigled from New Orleans to sling a pick on his little
+morgue of a narrow-gauge line. 'Twas sorrowful to hear the little,
+dirty general tell the opprobrious story of how he put salt upon the
+tail of that reckless and silly bird, Clancy. Laugh, he did, hearty
+and long. He shook with laughin', the black-faced rebel and outcast,
+standin' neck-deep in bananas, without friends or country.
+
+"'Ah, senor,' he snickers, 'to the death you would have laughed at
+that drollest Irish. I say to him: "Strong, big mans is need very
+much in Guatemala." "I will blows strike for your down-pressed
+country," he say. "That shall you do," I tell him. Ah! it was an
+Irish so comic. He sees one box break upon the wharf that contain for
+the guard a few gun. He think there is gun in all the box. But that
+is all pickaxe. Yes. Ah! senor, could you the face of that Irish have
+seen when they set him to the work!'
+
+"'Twas thus the ex-boss of the employment bureau contributed to the
+tedium of the trip with merry jests and anecdote. But now and then he
+would weep upon the bananas and make oration about the lost cause of
+liberty and the mule.
+
+"'Twas a pleasant sound when the steamer bumped against the pier in
+New Orleans. Pretty soon we heard the pat-a-pat of hundreds of bare
+feet, and the Dago gang that unloads the fruit jumped on the deck and
+down into the hold. Me and the general worked a while at passin' up
+the bunches, and they thought we were part of the gang. After about
+an hour we managed to slip off the steamer onto the wharf.
+
+"'Twas a great honour on the hands of an obscure Clancy, havin' the
+entertainment of the representative of a great foreign filibusterin'
+power. I first bought for the general and myself many long drinks
+and things to eat that were not bananas. The general man trotted
+along at my side, leavin' all the arrangements to me. I led him
+up to Lafayette Square and set him on a bench in the little park.
+Cigarettes I had bought for him, and he humped himself down on the
+seat like a little, fat, contented hobo. I look him over as he sets
+there, and what I see pleases me. Brown by nature and instinct, he
+is now brindled with dirt and dust. Praise to the mule, his clothes
+is mostly strings and flaps. Yes, the looks of the general man is
+agreeable to Clancy.
+
+"I ask him, delicate, if, by any chance, he brought away anybody's
+money with him from Guatemala. He sighs and bumps his shoulders
+against the bench. Not a cent. All right. Maybe, he tells me, some
+of his friends in the tropic outfit will send him funds later. The
+general was as clear a case of no visible means as I ever saw.
+
+"I told him not to move from the bench, and then I went up to the
+corner of Poydras and Carondelet. Along there is O'Hara's beat. In
+five minutes along comes O'Hara, a big, fine man, red-faced, with
+shinin' buttons, swingin' his club. 'Twould be a fine thing for
+Guatemala to move into O'Hara's precinct. 'Twould be a fine bit of
+recreation for Danny to suppress revolutions and uprisin's once or
+twice a week with his club.
+
+"'Is 5046 workin' yet, Danny?' says I, walkin' up to him.
+
+"'Overtime,' says O'Hara, lookin' over me suspicious. 'Want some of
+it?'
+
+"Fifty-forty-six is the celebrated city ordinance authorizin' arrest,
+conviction and imprisonment of persons that succeed in concealin'
+their crimes from the police.
+
+"'Don't ye know Jimmy Clancy?' says I. 'Ye pink-gilled monster.' So,
+when O'Hara recognized me beneath the scandalous exterior bestowed
+upon me by the tropics, I backed him into a doorway and told him what
+I wanted, and why I wanted it. 'All right, Jimmy,' says O'Hara. 'Go
+back and hold the bench. I'll be along in ten minutes.'
+
+"In that time O'Hara strolled through Lafayette Square and spied two
+Weary Willies disgracin' one of the benches. In ten minutes more J.
+Clancy and General De Vega, late candidate for the presidency of
+Guatemala, was in the station house. The general is badly frightened,
+and calls upon me to proclaim his distinguishments and rank.
+
+"'The man,' says I to the police, 'used to be a railroad man. He's on
+the bum now. 'Tis a little bughouse he is, on account of losin' his
+job.'
+
+"'_Carrambos!_' says the general, fizzin' like a little soda-water
+fountain, 'you fought, senor, with my forces in my native country.
+Why do you say the lies? You shall say I am the General De Vega, one
+soldier, one _caballero_--'
+
+"'Railroader,' says I again. 'On the hog. No good. Been livin' for
+three days on stolen bananas. Look at him. Ain't that enough?'
+
+"Twenty-five dollars or sixty days, was what the recorder gave the
+general. He didn't have a cent, so he took the time. They let me go,
+as I knew they would, for I had money to show, and O'Hara spoke for
+me. Yes; sixty days he got. 'Twas just so long that I slung a pick
+for the great country of Kam--Guatemala."
+
+Clancy paused. The bright starlight showed a reminiscent look of
+happy content on his seasoned features. Keogh leaned in his chair and
+gave his partner a slap on his thinly-clad back that sounded like the
+crack of the surf on the sands.
+
+"Tell 'em, ye divil," he chuckled, "how you got even with the
+tropical general in the way of agricultural manoeuvrings."
+
+"Havin' no money," concluded Clancy, with unction, "they set him
+to work his fine out with a gang from the parish prison clearing
+Ursulines Street. Around the corner was a saloon decorated genially
+with electric fans and cool merchandise. I made that me headquarters,
+and every fifteen minutes I'd walk around and take a look at the
+little man filibusterin' with a rake and shovel. 'Twas just such
+a hot broth of a day as this has been. And I'd call at him 'Hey,
+monseer!' and he'd look at me black, with the damp showin' through
+his shirt in places.
+
+"'Fat, strong mans,' says I to General De Vega, 'is needed in New
+Orleans. Yes. To carry on the good work. Carrambos! Erin go bragh!'"
+
+
+
+
+XI
+
+THE REMNANTS OF THE CODE
+
+
+Breakfast in Coralio was at eleven. Therefore the people did not go
+to market early. The little wooden market-house stood on a patch of
+short-trimmed grass, under the vivid green foliage of a bread-fruit
+tree.
+
+Thither one morning the venders leisurely convened, bringing their
+wares with them. A porch or platform six feet wide encircled the
+building, shaded from the mid-morning sun by the projecting,
+grass-thatched roof. Upon this platform the venders were wont to
+display their goods--newly-killed beef, fish, crabs, fruit of the
+country, cassava, eggs, _dulces_ and high, tottering stacks of native
+tortillas as large around as the sombrero of a Spanish grandee.
+
+But on this morning they whose stations lay on the seaward side of
+the market-house, instead of spreading their merchandise formed
+themselves into a softly jabbering and gesticulating group. For
+there upon their space of the platform was sprawled, asleep, the
+unbeautiful figure of "Beelzebub" Blythe. He lay upon a ragged strip
+of cocoa matting, more than ever a fallen angel in appearance. His
+suit of coarse flax, soiled, bursting at the seams, crumpled into
+a thousand diversified wrinkles and creases, inclosed him absurdly,
+like the garb of some effigy that had been stuffed in sport and
+thrown there after indignity had been wrought upon it. But firmly
+upon the high bridge of his nose reposed his gold-rimmed glasses, the
+surviving badge of his ancient glory.
+
+The sun's rays, reflecting quiveringly from the rippling sea upon his
+face, and the voices of the market-men woke "Beelzebub" Blythe. He
+sat up, blinking, and leaned his back against the wall of the market.
+Drawing a blighted silk handkerchief from his pocket, he assiduously
+rubbed and burnished his glasses. And while doing this he became
+aware that his bedroom had been invaded, and that polite brown and
+yellow men were beseeching him to vacate in favour of their market
+stuff.
+
+If the senor would have the goodness--a thousand pardons for bringing
+to him molestation--but soon would come the _compradores_ for the
+day's provisions--surely they had ten thousand regrets at disturbing
+him!
+
+In this manner they expanded to him the intimation that he must clear
+out and cease to clog the wheels of trade.
+
+Blythe stepped from the platform with the air of a prince leaving
+his canopied couch. He never quite lost that air, even at the lowest
+point of his fall. It is clear that the college of good breeding does
+not necessarily maintain a chair of morals within its walls.
+
+Blythe shook out his wry clothing, and moved slowly up the Calle
+Grande through the hot sand. He moved without a destination in his
+mind. The little town was languidly stirring to its daily life.
+Golden-skinned babies tumbled over one another in the grass. The sea
+breeze brought him appetite, but nothing to satisfy it. Throughout
+Coralio were its morning odors--those from the heavily fragrant
+tropical flowers and from the bread baking in the outdoor ovens of
+clay and the pervading smoke of their fires. Where the smoke cleared,
+the crystal air, with some of the efficacy of faith, seemed to remove
+the mountains almost to the sea, bringing them so near that one might
+count the scarred glades on their wooded sides. The light-footed
+Caribs were swiftly gliding to their tasks at the waterside. Already
+along the bosky trails from the banana groves files of horses were
+slowly moving, concealed, except for their nodding heads and plodding
+legs, by the bunches of green-golden fruit heaped upon their backs.
+On doorsills sat women combing their long, black hair and calling,
+one to another, across the narrow thoroughfares. Peace reigned in
+Coralio--arid and bald peace; but still peace.
+
+On that bright morning when Nature seemed to be offering the lotus on
+the Dawn's golden platter "Beelzebub" Blythe had reached rock bottom.
+Further descent seemed impossible. That last night's slumber in
+a public place had done for him. As long as he had had a roof to
+cover him there had remained, unbridged, the space that separates a
+gentleman from the beasts of the jungle and the fowls of the air. But
+now he was little more than a whimpering oyster led to be devoured on
+the sands of a Southern sea by the artful walrus, Circumstance, and
+the implacable carpenter, Fate.
+
+To Blythe money was now but a memory. He had drained his friends of
+all that their good-fellowship had to offer; then he had squeezed
+them to the last drop of their generosity; and at the last,
+Aaron-like, he had smitten the rock of their hardening bosoms for the
+scattering, ignoble drops of Charity itself.
+
+He had exhausted his credit to the last _real_. With the minute
+keenness of the shameless sponger he was aware of every source in
+Coralio from which a glass of rum, a meal or a piece of silver could
+be wheedled. Marshalling each such source in his mind, he considered
+it with all the thoroughness and penetration that hunger and thirst
+lent him for the task. All his optimism failed to thresh a grain of
+hope from the chaff of his postulations. He had played out the game.
+That one night in the open had shaken his nerves. Until then there
+had been left to him at least a few grounds upon which he could base
+his unblushing demands upon his neighbours' stores. Now he must beg
+instead of borrowing. The most brazen sophistry could not dignify by
+the name of "loan" the coin contemptuously flung to a beachcomber who
+slept on the bare boards of the public market.
+
+But on this morning no beggar would have more thankfully received
+a charitable coin, for the demon thirst had him by the throat--the
+drunkard's matutinal thirst that requires to be slaked at each
+morning station on the road to Tophet.
+
+Blythe walked slowly up the street, keeping a watchful eye for any
+miracle that might drop manna upon him in his wilderness. As he
+passed the popular eating house of Madama Vasquez, Madama's boarders
+were just sitting down to freshly-baked bread, _aguacates_, pines and
+delicious coffee that sent forth odorous guarantee of its quality
+upon the breeze. Madama was serving; she turned her shy, stolid,
+melancholy gaze for a moment out the window; she saw Blythe, and her
+expression turned more shy and embarrassed. "Beelzebub" owed her
+twenty _pesos_. He bowed as he had once bowed to less embarrassed
+dames to whom he owed nothing, and passed on.
+
+Merchants and their clerks were throwing open the solid wooden doors
+of their shops. Polite but cool were the glances they cast upon
+Blythe as he lounged tentatively by with the remains of his old
+jaunty air; for they were his creditors almost without exception.
+
+At the little fountain in the _plaza_ he made an apology for a toilet
+with his wetted handkerchief. Across the open square filed the
+dolorous line of friends of the prisoners in the _calaboza_, bearing
+the morning meal of the immured. The food in their hands aroused
+small longing in Blythe. It was drink that his soul craved, or money
+to buy it.
+
+In the streets he met many with whom he had been friends and equals,
+and whose patience and liberality he had gradually exhausted.
+Willard Geddie and Paula cantered past him with the coolest of nods,
+returning from their daily horseback ride along the old Indian road.
+Keogh passed him at another corner, whistling cheerfully and bearing
+a prize of newly-laid eggs for the breakfast of himself and Clancy.
+The jovial scout of Fortune was one of Blythe's victims who had
+plunged his hand oftenest into his pocket to aid him. But now it
+seemed that Keogh, too, had fortified himself against further
+invasions. His curt greeting and the ominous light in his full, grey
+eye quickened the steps of "Beelzebub," whom desperation had almost
+incited to attempt an additional "loan."
+
+Three drinking shops the forlorn one next visited in succession. In
+all of these his money, his credit and his welcome had long since
+been spent; but Blythe felt that he would have fawned in the dust at
+the feet of an enemy that morning for one draught of _aguardiente_.
+In two of the _pulperias_ his courageous petition for drink was met
+with a refusal so polite that it stung worse than abuse. The third
+establishment had acquired something of American methods; and here he
+was seized bodily and cast out upon his hands and knees.
+
+This physical indignity caused a singular change in the man. As he
+picked himself up and walked away, an expression of absolute relief
+came upon his features. The specious and conciliatory smile that
+had been graven there was succeeded by a look of calm and sinister
+resolve. "Beelzebub" had been floundering in the sea of improbity,
+holding by a slender life-line to the respectable world that had
+cast him overboard. He must have felt that with this ultimate shock
+the line had snapped, and have experienced the welcome ease of the
+drowning swimmer who has ceased to struggle.
+
+Blythe walked to the next corner and stood there while he brushed the
+sand from his garments and re-polished his glasses.
+
+"I've got to do it--oh, I've got to do it," he told himself, aloud.
+"If I had a quart of rum I believe I could stave it off yet--for a
+little while. But there's no more rum for--'Beelzebub,' as they call
+me. By the flames of Tartarus! if I'm to sit at the right hand of
+Satan somebody has got to pay the court expenses. You'll have to pony
+up, Mr. Frank Goodwin. You're a good fellow; but a gentleman must
+draw the line at being kicked into the gutter. Blackmail isn't a
+pretty word, but it's the next station on the road I'm travelling."
+
+With purpose in his steps Blythe now moved rapidly through the town
+by way of its landward environs. He passed through the squalid
+quarters of the improvident negroes and on beyond the picturesque
+shacks of the poorer _mestizos_. From many points along his course he
+could see, through the umbrageous glades, the house of Frank Goodwin
+on its wooded hill. And as he crossed the little bridge over the
+lagoon he saw the old Indian, Galvez, scrubbing at the wooden slab
+that bore the name of Miraflores. Beyond the lagoon the lands of
+Goodwin began to slope gently upward. A grassy road, shaded by a
+munificent and diverse array of tropical flora wound from the edge of
+an outlying banana grove to the dwelling. Blythe took this road with
+long and purposeful strides.
+
+Goodwin was seated on his coolest gallery, dictating letters to his
+secretary, a sallow and capable native youth. The household adhered
+to the American plan of breakfast; and that meal had been a thing of
+the past for the better part of an hour.
+
+The castaway walked to the steps, and flourished a hand.
+
+"Good morning, Blythe," said Goodwin, looking up. "Come in and have a
+chair. Anything I can do for you?"
+
+"I want to speak to you in private."
+
+Goodwin nodded at his secretary, who strolled out under a mango tree
+and lit a cigarette. Blythe took the chair that he had left vacant.
+
+"I want some money," he began, doggedly.
+
+"I'm sorry," said Goodwin, with equal directness, "but you can't have
+any. You're drinking yourself to death, Blythe. Your friends have
+done all they could to help you to brace up. You won't help yourself.
+There's no use furnishing you with money to ruin yourself with any
+longer."
+
+"Dear man," said Blythe, tilting back his chair, "it isn't a question
+of social economy now. It's past that. I like you, Goodwin; and I've
+come to stick a knife between your ribs. I was kicked out of Espada's
+saloon this morning; and Society owes me reparation for my wounded
+feelings."
+
+"I didn't kick you out."
+
+"No; but in a general way you represent Society; and in a particular
+way you represent my last chance. I've had to come down to it, old
+man--I tried to do it a month ago when Losada's man was here turning
+things over; but I couldn't do it then. Now it's different. I want a
+thousand dollars, Goodwin; and you'll have to give it to me."
+
+"Only last week," said Goodwin, with a smile, "a silver dollar was
+all you were asking for."
+
+"An evidence," said Blythe, flippantly, "that I was still
+virtuous--though under heavy pressure. The wages of sin should be
+something higher than a _peso_ worth forty-eight cents. Let's talk
+business. I am the villain in the third act; and I must have my
+merited, if only temporary, triumph. I saw you collar the late
+president's valiseful of boodle. Oh, I know it's blackmail; but I'm
+liberal about the price. I know I'm a cheap villain--one of the
+regular sawmill-drama kind--but you're one of my particular friends,
+and I don't want to stick you hard."
+
+"Suppose you go into the details," suggested Goodwin, calmly
+arranging his letters on the table.
+
+"All right," said "Beelzebub." "I like the way you take it. I despise
+histrionics; so you will please prepare yourself for the facts
+without any red fire, calcium or grace notes on the saxophone.
+
+"On the night that His Fly-by-night Excellency arrived in town I
+was very drunk. You will excuse the pride with which I state that
+fact; but it was quite a feat for me to attain that desirable state.
+Somebody had left a cot out under the orange trees in the yard of
+Madama Ortiz's hotel. I stepped over the wall, laid down upon it, and
+fell asleep. I was awakened by an orange that dropped from the tree
+upon my nose; and I laid there for awhile cursing Sir Isaac Newton,
+or whoever it was that invented gravitation, for not confining his
+theory to apples.
+
+"And then along came Mr. Miraflores and his true-love with the
+treasury in a valise, and went into the hotel. Next you hove in
+sight, and held a pow-wow with the tonsorial artist who insisted upon
+talking shop after hours. I tried to slumber again; but once more my
+rest was disturbed--this time by the noise of the popgun that went
+off upstairs. Then that valise came crashing down into an orange
+tree just above my head; and I arose from my couch, not knowing
+when it might begin to rain Saratoga trunks. When the army and the
+constabulary began to arrive, with their medals and decorations
+hastily pinned to their pajamas, and their snickersnees drawn, I
+crawled into the welcome shadow of a banana plant. I remained there
+for an hour, by which time the excitement and the people had cleared
+away. And then, my dear Goodwin--excuse me--I saw you sneak back and
+pluck that ripe and juicy valise from the orange tree. I followed
+you, and saw you take it to your own house. A hundred-thousand-dollar
+crop from one orange tree in a season about breaks the record of the
+fruit-growing industry.
+
+"Being a gentleman at that time, of course, I never mentioned the
+incident to anyone. But this morning I was kicked out of a saloon,
+my code of honour is all out at the elbows, and I'd sell my mother's
+prayer-book for three fingers of _aguardiente_. I'm not putting on
+the screws hard. It ought to be worth a thousand to you for me to
+have slept on that cot through the whole business without waking up
+and seeing anything."
+
+Goodwin opened two more letters, and made memoranda in pencil on
+them. Then he called "Manuel!" to his secretary, who came, spryly.
+
+"The _Ariel_--when does she sail?" asked Goodwin.
+
+"Senor," answered the youth, "at three this afternoon. She drops
+down-coast to Punta Soledad to complete her cargo of fruit. From
+there she sails for New Orleans without delay."
+
+"_Bueno!_" said Goodwin. "These letters may wait yet awhile."
+
+The secretary returned to his cigarette under the mango tree.
+
+"In round numbers," said Goodwin, facing Blythe squarely, "how much
+money do you owe in this town, not including the sums you have
+'borrowed' from me?"
+
+"Five hundred--at a rough guess," answered Blythe, lightly.
+
+"Go somewhere in the town and draw up a schedule of your debts," said
+Goodwin. "Come back here in two hours, and I will send Manuel with
+the money to pay them. I will also have a decent outfit of clothing
+ready for you. You will sail on the _Ariel_ at three. Manuel will
+accompany you as far as the deck of the steamer. There he will hand
+you one thousand dollars in cash. I suppose that we needn't discuss
+what you will be expected to do in return."
+
+"Oh, I understand," piped Blythe, cheerily. "I was asleep all the
+time on the cot under Madama Ortiz's orange trees; and I shake off
+the dust of Coralio forever. I'll play fair. No more of the lotus
+for me. Your proposition is O. K. You're a good fellow, Goodwin;
+and I let you off light. I'll agree to everything. But in the
+meantime--I've a devil of a thirst on, old man--"
+
+"Not a _centavo_," said Goodwin, firmly, "until you are on board the
+_Ariel_. You would be drunk in thirty minutes if you had money now."
+
+But he noticed the blood-streaked eyeballs, the relaxed form and the
+shaking hands of "Beelzebub;" and he stepped into the dining room
+through the low window, and brought out a glass and a decanter of
+brandy.
+
+"Take a bracer, anyway, before you go," he proposed, even as a man to
+the friend whom he entertains.
+
+"Beelzebub" Blythe's eyes glistened at the sight of the solace for
+which his soul burned. To-day for the first time his poisoned nerves
+had been denied their steadying dose; and their retort was a mounting
+torment. He grasped the decanter and rattled its crystal mouth
+against the glass in his trembling hand. He flushed the glass, and
+then stood erect, holding it aloft for an instant. For one fleeting
+moment he held his head above the drowning waves of his abyss. He
+nodded easily at Goodwin, raised his brimming glass and murmured a
+"health" that men had used in his ancient Paradise Lost. And then so
+suddenly that he spilled the brandy over his hand, he set down his
+glass, untasted.
+
+"In two hours," his dry lips muttered to Goodwin, as he marched down
+the steps and turned his face toward the town.
+
+In the edge of the cool banana grove "Beelzebub" halted, and snapped
+the tongue of his belt buckle into another hole.
+
+"I couldn't do it," he explained, feverishly, to the waving banana
+fronds. "I wanted to, but I couldn't. A gentleman can't drink with
+the man that he blackmails."
+
+
+
+
+XII
+
+SHOES
+
+
+John De Graffenreid Atwood ate of the lotus, root, stem, and flower.
+The tropics gobbled him up. He plunged enthusiastically into his
+work, which was to try to forget Rosine.
+
+Now, they who dine on the lotus rarely consume it plain. There is a
+sauce _au diable_ that goes with it; and the distillers are the chefs
+who prepare it. And on Johnny's menu card it read "brandy." With a
+bottle between them, he and Billy Keogh would sit on the porch of the
+little consulate at night and roar out great, indecorous songs, until
+the natives, slipping hastily past, would shrug a shoulder and mutter
+things to themselves about the "_Americanos diablos_."
+
+One day Johnny's _mozo_ brought the mail and dumped it on the table.
+Johnny leaned from his hammock, and fingered the four or five
+letters dejectedly. Keogh was sitting on the edge of the table
+chopping lazily with a paper knife at the legs of a centipede that
+was crawling among the stationery. Johnny was in that phase of
+lotus-eating when all the world tastes bitter in one's mouth.
+
+"Same old thing!" he complained. "Fool people writing for information
+about the country. They want to know all about raising fruit, and how
+to make a fortune without work. Half of 'em don't even send stamps
+for a reply. They think a consul hasn't anything to do but write
+letters. Slit those envelopes for me, old man, and see what they
+want. I'm feeling too rocky to move."
+
+Keogh, acclimated beyond all possibility of ill-humour, drew
+his chair to the table with smiling compliance on his rose-pink
+countenance, and began to slit open the letters. Four of them were
+from citizens in various parts of the United States who seemed to
+regard the consul at Coralio as a cyclopaedia of information. They
+asked long lists of questions, numerically arranged, about the
+climate, products, possibilities, laws, business chances, and
+statistics of the country in which the consul had the honour of
+representing his own government.
+
+"Write 'em, please, Billy," said that inert official, "just a line,
+referring them to the latest consular report. Tell 'em the State
+Department will be delighted to furnish the literary gems. Sign my
+name. Don't let your pen scratch, Billy; it'll keep me awake."
+
+"Don't snore," said Keogh, amiably, "and I'll do your work for you.
+You need a corps of assistants, anyhow. Don't see how you ever get
+out a report. Wake up a minute!--here's one more letter--it's from
+your own town, too--Dalesburg."
+
+"That so?" murmured Johnny showing a mild and obligatory interest.
+"What's it about?"
+
+"Postmaster writes," explained Keogh. "Says a citizen of the town
+wants some facts and advice from you. Says the citizen has an idea in
+his head of coming down where you are and opening a shoe store. Wants
+to know if you think the business would pay. Says he's heard of the
+boom along this coast, and wants to get in on the ground floor."
+
+In spite of the heat and his bad temper, Johnny's hammock swayed
+with his laughter. Keogh laughed too; and the pet monkey on the top
+shelf of the bookcase chattered in shrill sympathy with the ironical
+reception of the letter from Dalesburg.
+
+"Great bunions!" exclaimed the consul. "Shoe store! What'll they ask
+about next, I wonder? Overcoat factory, I reckon. Say, Billy--of our
+3,000 citizens, how many do you suppose ever had on a pair of shoes?"
+
+Keogh reflected judicially.
+
+"Let's see--there's you and me and--"
+
+"Not me," said Johnny, promptly and incorrectly, holding up a foot
+encased in a disreputable deerskin _zapato_. "I haven't been a victim
+to shoes in months."
+
+"But you've got 'em, though," went on Keogh. "And there's Goodwin
+and Blanchard and Geddie and old Lutz and Doc Gregg and that Italian
+that's agent for the banana company, and there's old Delgado--no;
+he wears sandals. And, oh, yes; there's Madama Ortiz, 'what kapes
+the hotel'--she had on a pair of red slippers at the _baile_ the
+other night. And Miss Pasa, her daughter, that went to school in
+the States--she brought back some civilized notions in the way of
+footgear. And there's the _comandante's_ sister that dresses up her
+feet on feast-days--and Mrs. Geddie, who wears a two with a Castilian
+instep--and that's about all the ladies. Let's see--don't some of the
+soldiers at the _cuartel_--no: that's so; they're allowed shoes only
+when on the march. In barracks they turn their little toeses out to
+grass."
+
+"'Bout right," agreed the consul. "Not over twenty out of the three
+thousand ever felt leather on their walking arrangements. Oh, yes;
+Coralio is just the town for an enterprising shoe store--that doesn't
+want to part with its goods. Wonder if old Patterson is trying to
+jolly me! He always was full of things he called jokes. Write him a
+letter, Billy. I'll dictate it. We'll jolly him back a few."
+
+Keogh dipped his pen, and wrote at Johnny's dictation. With many
+pauses, filled in with smoke and sundry travellings of the bottle
+and glasses, the following reply to the Dalesburg communication was
+perpetrated:
+
+
+ MR. OBADIAH PATTERSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+
+ _Dear Sir:_ In reply to your favour of July 2d, I have the
+ honour to inform you that, according to my opinion, there
+ is no place on the habitable globe that presents to the eye
+ stronger evidence of the need of a first-class shoe store
+ than does the town of Coralio. There are 3,000 inhabitants
+ in the place, and not a single shoe store! The situation
+ speaks for itself. This coast is rapidly becoming the goal
+ of enterprising business men, but the shoe business is one
+ that has been sadly overlooked or neglected. In fact, there
+ are a considerable number of our citizens actually without
+ shoes at present.
+
+ Besides the want above mentioned, there is also a crying
+ need for a brewery, a college of higher mathematics, a coal
+ yard, and a clean and intellectual Punch and Judy show. I
+ have the honour to be, sir,
+
+ Your Obt. Servant,
+
+ JOHN DE GRAFFENREID ATWOOD,
+ U. S. Consul at Coralio.
+
+ P.S.--Hello! Uncle Obadiah. How's the old burg racking
+ along? What would the government do without you and me?
+ Look out for a green-headed parrot and a bunch of bananas
+ soon, from your old friend
+
+ JOHNNY.
+
+
+"I throw in that postscript," explained the consul, "so Uncle Obadiah
+won't take offence at the official tone of the letter! Now, Billy,
+you get that correspondence fixed up, and send Pancho to the
+post-office with it. The _Ariadne_ takes the mail out to-morrow if
+they make up that load of fruit to-day."
+
+The night programme in Coralio never varied. The recreations of the
+people were soporific and flat. They wandered about, barefoot and
+aimless, speaking lowly and smoking cigar or cigarette. Looking
+down on the dimly lighted ways one seemed to see a threading maze
+of brunette ghosts tangled with a procession of insane fireflies.
+In some houses the thrumming of lugubrious guitars added to the
+depression of the _triste_ night. Giant tree-frogs rattled in the
+foliage as loudly as the end man's "bones" in a minstrel troupe. By
+nine o'clock the streets were almost deserted.
+
+Nor at the consulate was there often a change of bill. Keogh would
+come there nightly, for Coralio's one cool place was the little
+seaward porch of that official residence.
+
+The brandy would be kept moving; and before midnight sentiment would
+begin to stir in the heart of the self-exiled consul. Then he would
+relate to Keogh the story of his ended romance. Each night Keogh
+would listen patiently to the tale, and be ready with untiring
+sympathy.
+
+"But don't you think for a minute"--thus Johnny would always conclude
+his woeful narrative--"that I'm grieving about that girl, Billy. I've
+forgotten her. She never enters my mind. If she were to enter that
+door right now, my pulse wouldn't gain a beat. That's all over long
+ago."
+
+"Don't I know it?" Keogh would answer. "Of course you've forgotten
+her. Proper thing to do. Wasn't quite O. K. of her to listen to the
+knocks that--er--Dink Pawson kept giving you."
+
+"Pink Dawson!"--a world of contempt would be in Johnny's tones--"Poor
+white trash! That's what he was. Had five hundred acres of farming
+land, though; and that counted. Maybe I'll have a chance to get back
+at him some day. The Dawsons weren't anybody. Everybody in Alabama
+knows the Atwoods. Say, Billy--did you know my mother was a De
+Graffenreid?"
+
+"Why, no," Keogh would say; "is that so?" He had heard it some three
+hundred times.
+
+"Fact. The De Graffenreids of Hancock County. But I never think of
+that girl any more, do I, Billy?"
+
+"Not for a minute, my boy," would be the last sounds heard by the
+conqueror of Cupid.
+
+At this point Johnny would fall into a gentle slumber, and Keogh
+would saunter out to his own shack under the calabash tree at the
+edge of the plaza.
+
+In a day or two the letter from the Dalesburg postmaster and its
+answer had been forgotten by the Coralio exiles. But on the 26th day
+of July the fruit of the reply appeared upon the tree of events.
+
+The _Andador_, a fruit steamer that visited Coralio regularly, drew
+into the offing and anchored. The beach was lined with spectators
+while the quarantine doctor and the custom-house crew rowed out to
+attend to their duties.
+
+An hour later Billy Keogh lounged into the consulate, clean and cool
+in his linen clothes, and grinning like a pleased shark.
+
+"Guess what?" he said to Johnny, lounging in his hammock.
+
+"Too hot to guess," said Johnny, lazily.
+
+"Your shoe-store man's come," said Keogh, rolling the sweet morsel on
+his tongue, "with a stock of goods big enough to supply the continent
+as far down as Terra del Fuego. They're carting his cases over to
+the custom-house now. Six barges full they brought ashore and have
+paddled back for the rest. Oh, ye saints in glory! won't there
+be regalements in the air when he gets onto the joke and has an
+interview with Mr. Consul? It'll be worth nine years in the tropics
+just to witness that one joyful moment."
+
+Keogh loved to take his mirth easily. He selected a clean place
+on the matting and lay upon the floor. The walls shook with his
+enjoyment. Johnny turned half over and blinked.
+
+"Don't tell me," he said, "that anybody was fool enough to take that
+letter seriously."
+
+"Four-thousand-dollar stock of goods!" gasped Keogh, in ecstasy.
+"Talk about coals to Newcastle! Why didn't he take a ship-load of
+palm-leaf fans to Spitzbergen while he was about it? Saw the old
+codger on the beach. You ought to have been there when he put on his
+specs and squinted at the five hundred or so barefooted citizens
+standing around."
+
+"Are you telling the truth, Billy?" asked the consul, weakly.
+
+"Am I? You ought to see the buncoed gentleman's daughter he brought
+along. Looks! She makes the brick-dust senoritas here look like
+tar-babies."
+
+"Go on," said Johnny, "if you can stop that asinine giggling. I hate
+to see a grown man make a laughing hyena of himself."
+
+"Name is Hemstetter," went on Keogh. "He's a-- Hello! what's the
+matter now?"
+
+Johnny's moccasined feet struck the floor with a thud as he wriggled
+out of his hammock.
+
+"Get up, you idiot," he said, sternly, "or I'll brain you with this
+inkstand. That's Rosine and her father. Gad! what a drivelling idiot
+old Patterson is! Get up, here, Billy Keogh, and help me. What the
+devil are we going to do? Has all the world gone crazy?"
+
+Keogh rose and dusted himself. He managed to regain a decorous
+demeanour.
+
+"Situation has got to be met, Johnny," he said, with some success
+at seriousness. "I didn't think about its being your girl until you
+spoke. First thing to do is to get them comfortable quarters. You go
+down and face the music, and I'll trot out to Goodwin's and see if
+Mrs. Goodwin won't take them in. They've got the decentest house in
+town."
+
+"Bless you, Billy!" said the consul. "I knew you wouldn't desert me.
+The world's bound to come to an end, but maybe we can stave it off
+for a day or two."
+
+Keogh hoisted his umbrella and set out for Goodwin's house. Johnny
+put on his coat and hat. He picked up the brandy bottle, but set it
+down again without drinking, and marched bravely down to the beach.
+
+In the shade of the custom-house walls he found Mr. Hemstetter and
+Rosine surrounded by a mass of gaping citizens. The customs officers
+were ducking and scraping, while the captain of the _Andador_
+interpreted the business of the new arrivals. Rosine looked healthy
+and very much alive. She was gazing at the strange scenes around her
+with amused interest. There was a faint blush upon her round cheek as
+she greeted her old admirer. Mr. Hemstetter shook hands with Johnny
+in a very friendly way. He was an oldish, impractical man--one
+of that numerous class of erratic business men who are forever
+dissatisfied, and seeking a change.
+
+"I am very glad to see you, John--may I call you John?" he said. "Let
+me thank you for your prompt answer to our postmaster's letter of
+inquiry. He volunteered to write to you on my behalf. I was looking
+about for something different in the way of a business in which the
+profits would be greater. I had noticed in the papers that this coast
+was receiving much attention from investors. I am extremely grateful
+for your advice to come. I sold out everything that I possess, and
+invested the proceeds in as fine a stock of shoes as could be bought
+in the North. You have a picturesque town here, John. I hope business
+will be as good as your letter justifies me in expecting."
+
+Johnny's agony was abbreviated by the arrival of Keogh, who hurried
+up with the news that Mrs. Goodwin would be much pleased to place
+rooms at the disposal of Mr. Hemstetter and his daughter. So there
+Mr. Hemstetter and Rosine were at once conducted and left to
+recuperate from the fatigue of the voyage, while Johnny went down
+to see that the cases of shoes were safely stored in the customs
+warehouse pending their examination by the officials. Keogh, grinning
+like a shark, skirmished about to find Goodwin, to instruct him not
+to expose to Mr. Hemstetter the true state of Coralio as a shoe
+market until Johnny had been given a chance to redeem the situation,
+if such a thing were possible.
+
+That night the consul and Keogh held a desperate consultation on the
+breezy porch of the consulate.
+
+"Send 'em back home," began Keogh, reading Johnny's thoughts.
+
+"I would," said Johnny, after a little silence; "but I've been lying
+to you, Billy."
+
+"All right about that," said Keogh, affably.
+
+"I've told you hundreds of times," said Johnny, slowly, "that I had
+forgotten that girl, haven't I?"
+
+"About three hundred and seventy-five," admitted the monument of
+patience.
+
+"I lied," repeated the consul, "every time. I never forgot her for
+one minute. I was an obstinate ass for running away just because she
+said 'No' once. And I was too proud a fool to go back. I talked with
+Rosine a few minutes this evening up at Goodwin's. I found out one
+thing. You remember that farmer fellow who was always after her?"
+
+"Dink Pawson?" asked Keogh.
+
+"Pink Dawson. Well, he wasn't a hill of beans to her. She says she
+didn't believe a word of the things he told her about me. But I'm
+sewed up now, Billy. That tomfool letter we sent ruined whatever
+chance I had left. She'll despise me when she finds out that her old
+father has been made the victim of a joke that a decent school boy
+wouldn't have been guilty of. Shoes! Why he couldn't sell twenty
+pairs of shoes in Coralio if he kept store here for twenty years. You
+put a pair of shoes on one of these Caribs or Spanish brown boys and
+what'd he do? Stand on his head and squeal until he'd kicked 'em off.
+None of 'em ever wore shoes and they never will. If I send 'em back
+home I'll have to tell the whole story, and what'll she think of
+me? I want that girl worse than ever, Billy, and now when she's in
+reach I've lost her forever because I tried to be funny when the
+thermometer was at 102."
+
+"Keep cheerful," said the optimistic Keogh. "And let 'em open the
+store. I've been busy myself this afternoon. We can stir up a
+temporary boom in foot-gear anyhow. I'll buy six pairs when the doors
+open. I've been around and seen all the fellows and explained the
+catastrophe. They'll all buy shoes like they was centipedes. Frank
+Goodwin will take cases of 'em. The Geddies want about eleven pairs
+between 'em. Clancy is going to invest the savings of weeks, and even
+old Doc Gregg wants three pairs of alligator-hide slippers if they've
+got any tens. Blanchard got a look at Miss Hemstetter; and as he's a
+Frenchman, no less than a dozen pairs will do for him."
+
+"A dozen customers," said Johnny, "for a $4,000 stock of shoes! It
+won't work. There's a big problem here to figure out. You go home,
+Billy, and leave me alone. I've got to work at it all by myself. Take
+that bottle of Three-star along with you--no, sir; not another ounce
+of booze for the United States consul. I'll sit here to-night and
+pull out the think stop. If there's a soft place on this proposition
+anywhere I'll land on it. If there isn't there'll be another wreck to
+the credit of the gorgeous tropics."
+
+Keogh left, feeling that he could be of no use. Johnny laid a handful
+of cigars on a table and stretched himself in a steamer chair. When
+the sudden daylight broke, silvering the harbour ripples, he was
+still sitting there. Then he got up, whistling a little tune, and
+took his bath.
+
+At nine o'clock he walked down to the dingy little cable office and
+hung for half an hour over a blank. The result of his application was
+the following message, which he signed and had transmitted at a cost
+of $33:
+
+
+ TO PINKNEY DAWSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+
+ Draft for $100 comes to you next mail. Ship me immediately
+ 500 pounds stiff, dry cockleburrs. New use here in arts.
+ Market price twenty cents pound. Further orders likely.
+ Rush.
+
+
+
+
+XIII
+
+SHIPS
+
+
+Within a week a suitable building had been secured in the Calle
+Grande, and Mr. Hemstetter's stock of shoes arranged upon their
+shelves. The rent of the store was moderate; and the stock made a
+fine showing of neat white boxes, attractively displayed.
+
+Johnny's friends stood by him loyally. On the first day Keogh
+strolled into the store in a casual kind of way about once every
+hour, and bought shoes. After he had purchased a pair each of
+extension soles, congress gaiters, button kids, low-quartered calfs,
+dancing pumps, rubber boots, tans of various hues, tennis shoes and
+flowered slippers, he sought out Johnny to be prompted as to names
+of other kinds that he might inquire for. The other English-speaking
+residents also played their parts nobly by buying often and
+liberally. Keogh was grand marshal, and made them distribute their
+patronage, thus keeping up a fair run of custom for several days.
+
+Mr. Hemstetter was gratified by the amount of business done thus far;
+but expressed surprise that the natives were so backward with their
+custom.
+
+"Oh, they're awfully shy," explained Johnny, as he wiped his forehead
+nervously. "They'll get the habit pretty soon. They'll come with a
+rush when they do come."
+
+One afternoon Keogh dropped into the consul's office, chewing an
+unlighted cigar thoughtfully.
+
+"Got anything up your sleeve?" he inquired of Johnny. "If you have
+it's about time to show it. If you can borrow some gent's hat in the
+audience, and make a lot of customers for an idle stock of shoes
+come out of it, you'd better spiel. The boys have all laid in enough
+footwear to last 'em ten years; and there's nothing doing in the shoe
+store but dolcy far nienty. I just came by there. Your venerable
+victim was standing in the door, gazing through his specs at the
+bare toes passing by his emporium. The natives here have got the
+true artistic temperament. Me and Clancy took eighteen tintypes this
+morning in two hours. There's been but one pair of shoes sold all
+day. Blanchard went in and bought a pair of fur-lined house-slippers
+because he thought he saw Miss Hemstetter go into the store. I saw
+him throw the slippers into the lagoon afterwards."
+
+"There's a Mobile fruit steamer coming in to-morrow or next day,"
+said Johnny. "We can't do anything until then."
+
+"What are you going to do--try to create a demand?"
+
+"Political economy isn't your strong point," said the consul,
+impudently. "You can't create a demand. But you can create a
+necessity for a demand. That's what I am going to do."
+
+Two weeks after the consul sent his cable, a fruit steamer brought
+him a huge, mysterious brown bale of some unknown commodity. Johnny's
+influence with the custom-house people was sufficiently strong for
+him to get the goods turned over to him without the usual inspection.
+He had the bale taken to the consulate and snugly stowed in the back
+room.
+
+That night he ripped open a corner of it and took out a handful of
+the cockleburrs. He examined them with the care with which a warrior
+examines his arms before he goes forth to battle for his lady-love
+and life. The burrs were the ripe August product, as hard as
+filberts, and bristling with spines as tough and sharp as needles.
+Johnny whistled softly a little tune, and went out to find Billy
+Keogh.
+
+Later in the night, when Coralio was steeped in slumber, he and Billy
+went forth into the deserted streets with their coats bulging like
+balloons. All up and down the Calle Grande they went, sowing the
+sharp burrs carefully in the sand, along the narrow sidewalks, in
+every foot of grass between the silent houses. And then they took the
+side streets and by-ways, missing none. No place where the foot of
+man, woman or child might fall was slighted. Many trips they made to
+and from the prickly hoard. And then, nearly at the dawn, they laid
+themselves down to rest calmly, as great generals do after planning
+a victory according to the revised tactics, and slept, knowing that
+they had sowed with the accuracy of Satan sowing tares and the
+perseverance of Paul planting.
+
+With the rising sun came the purveyors of fruits and meats, and
+arranged their wares in and around the little market-house. At one
+end of the town near the seashore the market-house stood; and the
+sowing of the burrs had not been carried that far. The dealers waited
+long past the hour when their sales usually began. None came to buy.
+"_Que hay?_" they began to exclaim, one to another.
+
+At their accustomed time, from every 'dobe and palm hut and
+grass-thatched shack and dim _patio_ glided women--black women, brown
+women, lemon-colored women, women dun and yellow and tawny. They
+were the marketers starting to purchase the family supply of cassava,
+plantains, meat, fowls, and tortillas. Decollete they were and
+bare-armed and bare-footed, with a single skirt reaching below the
+knee. Stolid and ox-eyed, they stepped from their doorways into the
+narrow paths or upon the soft grass of the streets.
+
+The first to emerge uttered ambiguous squeals, and raised one foot
+quickly. Another step and they sat down, with shrill cries of alarm,
+to pick at the new and painful insects that had stung them upon the
+feet. "_Que picadores diablos!_" they screeched to one another across
+the narrow ways. Some tried the grass instead of the paths, but there
+they were also stung and bitten by the strange little prickly balls.
+They plumped down in the grass, and added their lamentations to those
+of their sisters in the sandy paths. All through the town was heard
+the plaint of the feminine jabber. The venders in the market still
+wondered why no customers came.
+
+Then men, lords of the earth, came forth. They, too, began to hop,
+to dance, to limp, and to curse. They stood stranded and foolish, or
+stooped to pluck at the scourge that attacked their feet and ankles.
+Some loudly proclaimed the pest to be poisonous spiders of an unknown
+species.
+
+And then the children ran out for their morning romp. And now to
+the uproar was added the howls of limping infants and cockleburred
+childhood. Every minute the advancing day brought forth fresh
+victims.
+
+Dona Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas stepped from her
+honoured doorway, as was her daily custom, to procure fresh bread
+from the _panaderia_ across the street. She was clad in a skirt of
+flowered yellow satin, a chemise of ruffled linen, and wore a purple
+mantilla from the looms of Spain. Her lemon-tinted feet, alas! were
+bare. Her progress was majestic, for were not her ancestors hidalgos
+of Aragon? Three steps she made across the velvety grass, and
+set her aristocratic sole upon a bunch of Johnny's burrs. Dona
+Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas emitted a yowl even
+as a wild-cat. Turning about, she fell upon hands and knees, and
+crawled--ay, like a beast of the field she crawled back to her
+honourable door-sill.
+
+Don Senor Ildefonso Federico Valdazar, _Juez de la Paz_, weighing
+twenty stone, attempted to convey his bulk to the _pulperia_ at
+the corner of the plaza in order to assuage his matutinal thirst.
+The first plunge of his unshod foot into the cool grass struck a
+concealed mine. Don Ildefonso fell like a crumpled cathedral, crying
+out that he had been fatally bitten by a deadly scorpion. Everywhere
+were the shoeless citizens hopping, stumbling, limping, and picking
+from their feet the venomous insects that had come in a single night
+to harass them.
+
+The first to perceive the remedy was Esteban Delgado, the barber, a
+man of travel and education. Sitting upon a stone, he plucked burrs
+from his toes, and made oration:
+
+"Behold, my friends, these bugs of the devil! I know them well. They
+soar through the skies in swarms like pigeons. These are the dead
+ones that fell during the night. In Yucatan I have seen them as large
+as oranges. Yes! There they hiss like serpents, and have wings like
+bats. It is the shoes--the shoes that one needs! _Zapatos--zapatos
+para mi!_"
+
+Esteban hobbled to Mr. Hemstetter's store, and bought shoes. Coming
+out, he swaggered down the street with impunity, reviling loudly the
+bugs of the devil. The suffering ones sat up or stood upon one foot
+and beheld the immune barber. Men, women and children took up the
+cry: "_Zapatos! zapatos!_"
+
+The necessity for the demand had been created. The demand followed.
+That day Mr. Hemstetter sold three hundred pairs of shoes.
+
+"It is really surprising," he said to Johnny, who came up in the
+evening to help him straighten out the stock, "how trade is picking
+up. Yesterday I made but three sales."
+
+"I told you they'd whoop things up when they got started," said the
+consul.
+
+"I think I shall order a dozen more cases of goods, to keep the stock
+up," said Mr. Hemstetter, beaming through his spectacles.
+
+"I wouldn't send in any orders yet," advised Johnny. "Wait till you
+see how the trade holds up."
+
+Each night Johnny and Keogh sowed the crop that grew dollars by day.
+At the end of ten days two-thirds of the stock of shoes had been
+sold; and the stock of cockleburrs was exhausted. Johnny cabled to
+Pink Dawson for another 500 pounds, paying twenty cents per pound as
+before. Mr. Hemstetter carefully made up an order for $1500 worth of
+shoes from Northern firms. Johnny hung about the store until this
+order was ready for the mail, and succeeded in destroying it before
+it reached the postoffice.
+
+That night he took Rosine under the mango tree by Goodwin's porch,
+and confessed everything. She looked him in the eye, and said: "You
+are a very wicked man. Father and I will go back home. You say it was
+a joke? I think it is a very serious matter."
+
+But at the end of half an hour's argument the conversation had
+been turned upon a different subject. The two were considering the
+respective merits of pale blue and pink wall paper with which the
+old colonial mansion of the Atwoods in Dalesburg was to be decorated
+after the wedding.
+
+On the next morning Johnny confessed to Mr. Hemstetter. The shoe
+merchant put on his spectacles, and said through them: "You strike me
+as being a most extraordinary young scamp. If I had not managed this
+enterprise with good business judgment my entire stock of goods might
+have been a complete loss. Now, how do you propose to dispose of the
+rest of it?"
+
+When the second invoice of cockleburrs arrived Johnny loaded them and
+the remainder of the shoes into a schooner, and sailed down the coast
+to Alazan.
+
+There, in the same dark and diabolical manner, he repeated his
+success; and came back with a bag of money and not so much as a
+shoestring.
+
+And then he besought his great Uncle of the waving goatee and starred
+vest to accept his resignation, for the lotus no longer lured him. He
+hankered for the spinach and cress of Dalesburg.
+
+The services of Mr. William Terence Keogh as acting consul, _pro
+tem._, were suggested and accepted, and Johnny sailed with the
+Hemstetters back to his native shores.
+
+Keogh slipped into the sinecure of the American consulship with
+the ease that never left him even in such high places. The tintype
+establishment was soon to become a thing of the past, although its
+deadly work along the peaceful and helpless Spanish Main was never
+effaced. The restless partners were about to be off again, scouting
+ahead of the slow ranks of Fortune. But now they would take different
+ways. There were rumours of a promising uprising in Peru; and thither
+the martial Clancy would turn his adventurous steps. As for Keogh, he
+was figuring in his mind and on quires of Government letter-heads a
+scheme that dwarfed the art of misrepresenting the human countenance
+upon tin.
+
+"What suits me," Keogh used to say, "in the way of a business
+proposition is something diversified that looks like a longer shot
+than it is--something in the way of a genteel graft that isn't worked
+enough for the correspondence schools to be teaching it by mail. I
+take the long end; but I like to have at least as good a chance to
+win as a man learning to play poker on an ocean steamer, or running
+for governor of Texas on the Republican ticket. And when I cash in my
+winnings, I don't want to find any widows' and orphans' chips in my
+stack."
+
+The grass-grown globe was the green table on which Keogh gambled. The
+games he played were of his own invention. He was no grubber after
+the diffident dollar. Nor did he care to follow it with horn and
+hounds. Rather he loved to coax it with egregious and brilliant flies
+from its habitat in the waters of strange streams. Yet Keogh was a
+business man; and his schemes, in spite of their singularity, were as
+solidly set as the plans of a building contractor. In Arthur's time
+Sir William Keogh would have been a Knight of the Round Table. In
+these modern days he rides abroad, seeking the Graft instead of the
+Grail.
+
+Three days after Johnny's departure, two small schooners appeared
+off Coralio. After some delay a boat put off from one of them, and
+brought a sunburned young man ashore. This young man had a shrewd and
+calculating eye; and he gazed with amazement at the strange things
+that he saw. He found on the beach some one who directed him to the
+consul's office; and thither he made his way at a nervous gait.
+
+Keogh was sprawled in the official chair, drawing caricatures of
+his Uncle's head on an official pad of paper. He looked up at his
+visitor.
+
+"Where's Johnny Atwood?" inquired the sunburned young man, in a
+business tone.
+
+"Gone," said Keogh, working carefully at Uncle Sam's necktie.
+
+"That's just like him," remarked the nut-brown one, leaning against
+the table. "He always was a fellow to gallivant around instead of
+'tending to business. Will he be in soon?"
+
+"Don't think so," said Keogh, after a fair amount of deliberation.
+
+"I s'pose he's out at some of his tomfoolery," conjectured the
+visitor, in a tone of virtuous conviction. "Johnny never would stick
+to anything long enough to succeed. I wonder how he manages to run
+his business here, and never be 'round to look after it."
+
+"I'm looking after the business just now," admitted the _pro tem._
+consul.
+
+"Are you--then, say!--where's the factory?"
+
+"What factory?" asked Keogh, with a mildly polite interest.
+
+"Why, the factory where they use them cockleburrs. Lord knows what
+they use 'em for, anyway! I've got the basements of both them ships
+out there loaded with 'em. I'll give you a bargain in this lot. I've
+had every man, woman and child around Dalesburg that wasn't busy
+pickin' 'em for a month. I hired these ships to bring 'em over.
+Everybody thought I was crazy. Now, you can have this lot for fifteen
+cents a pound, delivered on land. And if you want more I guess old
+Alabam' can come up to the demand. Johnny told me when he left home
+that if he struck anything down here that there was any money in he'd
+let me in on it. Shall I drive the ships in and hitch?"
+
+A look of supreme, almost incredulous, delight dawned in Keogh's
+ruddy countenance. He dropped his pencil. His eyes turned upon the
+sunburned young man with joy in them mingled with fear lest his
+ecstasy should prove a dream.
+
+"For God's sake, tell me," said Keogh, earnestly, "are you Dink
+Pawson?"
+
+"My name is Pinkney Dawson," said the cornerer of the cockleburr
+market.
+
+Billy Keogh slid rapturously and gently from his chair to his
+favourite strip of matting on the floor.
+
+There were not many sounds in Coralio on that sultry afternoon.
+Among those that were may be mentioned a noise of enraptured and
+unrighteous laughter from a prostrate Irish-American, while a
+sunburned young man, with a shrewd eye, looked on him with wonder and
+amazement. Also the "tramp, tramp, tramp" of many well-shod feet in
+the streets outside. Also the lonesome wash of the waves that beat
+along the historic shores of the Spanish Main.
+
+
+
+
+XIV
+
+MASTERS OF ARTS
+
+
+A two-inch stub of a blue pencil was the wand with which Keogh
+performed the preliminary acts of his magic. So, with this he covered
+paper with diagrams and figures while he waited for the United States
+of America to send down to Coralio a successor to Atwood, resigned.
+
+The new scheme that his mind had conceived, his stout heart indorsed,
+and his blue pencil corroborated, was laid around the characteristics
+and human frailties of the new president of Anchuria. These
+characteristics, and the situation out of which Keogh hoped to wrest
+a golden tribute, deserve chronicling contributive to the clear order
+of events.
+
+President Losada--many called him Dictator--was a man whose genius
+would have made him conspicuous even among Anglo-Saxons, had not
+that genius been intermixed with other traits that were petty and
+subversive. He had some of the lofty patriotism of Washington (the
+man he most admired), the force of Napoleon, and much of the wisdom
+of the sages. These characteristics might have justified him in the
+assumption of the title of "The Illustrious Liberator," had they not
+been accompanied by a stupendous and amazing vanity that kept him in
+the less worthy ranks of the dictators.
+
+Yet he did his country great service. With a mighty grasp he shook it
+nearly free from the shackles of ignorance and sloth and the vermin
+that fed upon it, and all but made it a power in the council of
+nations. He established schools and hospitals, built roads, bridges,
+railroads and palaces, and bestowed generous subsidies upon the arts
+and sciences. He was the absolute despot and the idol of his people.
+The wealth of the country poured into his hands. Other presidents had
+been rapacious without reason. Losada amassed enormous wealth, but
+his people had their share of the benefits.
+
+The joint in his armour was his insatiate passion for monuments and
+tokens commemorating his glory. In every town he caused to be erected
+statues of himself bearing legends in praise of his greatness. In
+the walls of every public edifice, tablets were fixed reciting his
+splendour and the gratitude of his subjects. His statuettes and
+portraits were scattered throughout the land in every house and hut.
+One of the sycophants in his court painted him as St. John, with a
+halo and a train of attendants in full uniform. Losada saw nothing
+incongruous in this picture, and had it hung in a church in the
+capital. He ordered from a French sculptor a marble group including
+himself with Napoleon, Alexander the Great, and one or two others
+whom he deemed worthy of the honour.
+
+He ransacked Europe for decorations, employing policy, money and
+intrigue to cajole the orders he coveted from kings and rulers. On
+state occasions his breast was covered from shoulder to shoulder with
+crosses, stars, golden roses, medals and ribbons. It was said that
+the man who could contrive for him a new decoration, or invent some
+new method of extolling his greatness, might plunge a hand deep into
+the treasury.
+
+This was the man upon whom Billy Keogh had his eye. The gentle
+buccaneer had observed the rain of favors that fell upon those who
+ministered to the president's vanities, and he did not deem it his
+duty to hoist his umbrella against the scattering drops of liquid
+fortune.
+
+In a few weeks the new consul arrived, releasing Keogh from his
+temporary duties. He was a young man fresh from college, who lived
+for botany alone. The consulate at Coralio gave him the opportunity
+to study tropical flora. He wore smoked glasses, and carried a green
+umbrella. He filled the cool, back porch of the consulate with plants
+and specimens so that space for a bottle and chair was not to be
+found. Keogh gazed on him sadly, but without rancour, and began to
+pack his gripsack. For his new plot against stagnation along the
+Spanish Main required of him a voyage overseas.
+
+Soon came the _Karlsefin_ again--she of the trampish habits--gleaning
+a cargo of cocoanuts for a speculative descent upon the New York
+market. Keogh was booked for a passage on the return trip.
+
+"Yes, I'm going to New York," he explained to the group of his
+countrymen that had gathered on the beach to see him off. "But I'll
+be back before you miss me. I've undertaken the art education of this
+piebald country, and I'm not the man to desert it while it's in the
+early throes of tintypes."
+
+With this mysterious declaration of his intentions Keogh boarded the
+_Karlsefin_.
+
+Ten days later, shivering, with the collar of his thin coat turned
+high, he burst into the studio of Carolus White at the top of a tall
+building in Tenth Street, New York City.
+
+Carolus White was smoking a cigarette and frying sausages over an oil
+stove. He was only twenty-three, and had noble theories about art.
+
+"Billy Keogh!" exclaimed White, extending the hand that was not busy
+with the frying pan. "From what part of the uncivilized world, I
+wonder!"
+
+"Hello, Carry," said Keogh, dragging forward a stool, and holding his
+fingers close to the stove. "I'm glad I found you so soon. I've been
+looking for you all day in the directories and art galleries. The
+free-lunch man on the corner told me where you were, quick. I was
+sure you'd be painting pictures yet."
+
+Keogh glanced about the studio with the shrewd eye of a connoisseur
+in business.
+
+"Yes, you can do it," he declared, with many gentle nods of his head.
+"That big one in the corner with the angels and green clouds and
+band-wagon is just the sort of thing we want. What would you call
+that, Carry--scene from Coney Island, ain't it?"
+
+"That," said White, "I had intended to call 'The Translation of
+Elijah,' but you may be nearer right than I am."
+
+"Name doesn't matter," said Keogh, largely; "it's the frame and the
+varieties of paint that does the trick. Now, I can tell you in a
+minute what I want. I've come on a little voyage of two thousand
+miles to take you in with me on a scheme. I thought of you as soon as
+the scheme showed itself to me. How would you like to go back with
+me and paint a picture? Ninety days for the trip, and five thousand
+dollars for the job."
+
+"Cereal food or hair-tonic posters?" asked White.
+
+"It isn't an ad."
+
+"What kind of a picture is it to be?"
+
+"It's a long story," said Keogh.
+
+"Go ahead with it. If you don't mind, while you talk I'll just keep
+my eye on these sausages. Let 'em get one shade deeper than a Vandyke
+brown and you spoil 'em."
+
+Keogh explained his project. They were to return to Coralio, where
+White was to pose as a distinguished American portrait painter who
+was touring in the tropics as a relaxation from his arduous and
+remunerative professional labours. It was not an unreasonable hope,
+even to those who had trod in the beaten paths of business, that an
+artist with so much prestige might secure a commission to perpetuate
+upon canvas the lineaments of the president, and secure a share of
+the _pesos_ that were raining upon the caterers to his weaknesses.
+
+Keogh had set his price at ten thousand dollars. Artists had been
+paid more for portraits. He and White were to share the expenses of
+the trip, and divide the possible profits. Thus he laid the scheme
+before White, whom he had known in the West before one declared for
+Art and the other became a Bedouin.
+
+Before long the two machinators abandoned the rigour of the bare
+studio for a snug corner of a cafe. There they sat far into the
+night, with old envelopes and Keogh's stub of blue pencil between
+them.
+
+At twelve o'clock White doubled up in his chair, with his chin on his
+fist, and shut his eyes at the unbeautiful wall-paper.
+
+"I'll go you, Billy," he said, in the quiet tones of decision. "I've
+got two or three hundred saved up for sausages and rent; and I'll
+take the chance with you. Five thousand! It will give me two years in
+Paris and one in Italy. I'll begin to pack to-morrow."
+
+"You'll begin in ten minutes," said Keogh. "It's to-morrow now. The
+_Karlsefin_ starts back at four P.M. Come on to your painting shop,
+and I'll help you."
+
+For five months in the year Coralio is the Newport of Anchuria.
+Then only does the town possess life. From November to March it is
+practically the seat of government. The president with his official
+family sojourns there; and society follows him. The pleasure-loving
+people make the season one long holiday of amusement and rejoicing.
+_Fiestas_, balls, games, sea bathing, processions and small theatres
+contribute to their enjoyment. The famous Swiss band from the
+capital plays in the little plaza every evening, while the fourteen
+carriages and vehicles in the town circle in funereal but complacent
+procession. Indians from the interior mountains, looking like
+prehistoric stone idols, come down to peddle their handiwork in the
+streets. The people throng the narrow ways, a chattering, happy,
+careless stream of buoyant humanity. Preposterous children rigged out
+with the shortest of ballet skirts and gilt wings, howl, underfoot,
+among the effervescent crowds. Especially is the arrival of the
+presidential party, at the opening of the season, attended with pomp,
+show and patriotic demonstrations of enthusiasm and delight.
+
+When Keogh and White reached their destination, on the return trip
+of the _Karlsefin_, the gay winter season was well begun. As they
+stepped upon the beach they could hear the band playing in the plaza.
+The village maidens, with fireflies already fixed in their dark
+locks, were gliding, barefoot and coy-eyed, along the paths. Dandies
+in white linen, swinging their canes, were beginning their seductive
+strolls. The air was full of human essence, of artificial enticement,
+of coquetry, indolence, pleasure--the man-made sense of existence.
+
+The first two or three days after their arrival were spent in
+preliminaries. Keogh escorted the artist about town, introducing
+him to the little circle of English-speaking residents and pulling
+whatever wires he could to effect the spreading of White's fame as a
+painter. And then Keogh planned a more spectacular demonstration of
+the idea he wished to keep before the public.
+
+He and White engaged rooms in the Hotel de los Estranjeros. The
+two were clad in new suits of immaculate duck, with American straw
+hats, and carried canes of remarkable uniqueness and inutility. Few
+caballeros in Coralio--even the gorgeously uniformed officers of
+the Anchurian army--were as conspicuous for ease and elegance of
+demeanour as Keogh and his friend, the great American painter, Senor
+White.
+
+White set up his easel on the beach and made striking sketches of the
+mountain and sea views. The native population formed at his rear in a
+vast, chattering semicircle to watch his work. Keogh, with his care
+for details, had arranged for himself a pose which he carried out
+with fidelity. His role was that of friend to the great artist, a
+man of affairs and leisure. The visible emblem of his position was a
+pocket camera.
+
+"For branding the man who owns it," said he, "a genteel dilettante
+with a bank account and an easy conscience, a steam-yacht ain't in it
+with a camera. You see a man doing nothing but loafing around making
+snap-shots, and you know right away he reads up well in 'Bradstreet.'
+You notice these old millionaire boys--soon as they get through
+taking everything else in sight they go to taking photographs.
+People are more impressed by a kodak than they are by a title or
+a four-carat scarf-pin." So Keogh strolled blandly about Coralio,
+snapping the scenery and the shrinking senoritas, while White posed
+conspicuously in the higher regions of art.
+
+Two weeks after their arrival, the scheme began to bear fruit.
+An aide-de-camp of the president drove to the hotel in a dashing
+victoria. The president desired that Senor White come to the Casa
+Morena for an informal interview.
+
+Keogh gripped his pipe tightly between his teeth. "Not a cent less
+than ten thousand," he said to the artist--"remember the price.
+And in gold or its equivalent--don't let him stick you with this
+bargain-counter stuff they call money here."
+
+"Perhaps it isn't that he wants," said White.
+
+"Get out!" said Keogh, with splendid confidence. "I know what he
+wants. He wants his picture painted by the celebrated young American
+painter and filibuster now sojourning in his down-trodden country.
+Off you go."
+
+The victoria sped away with the artist. Keogh walked up and down,
+puffing great clouds of smoke from his pipe, and waited. In an hour
+the victoria swept again to the door of the hotel, deposited White,
+and vanished. The artist dashed up the stairs, three at a step. Keogh
+stopped smoking, and became a silent interrogation point.
+
+"Landed," exclaimed White, with his boyish face flushed with elation.
+"Billy, you are a wonder. He wants a picture. I'll tell you all about
+it. By Heavens! that dictator chap is a corker! He's a dictator clear
+down to his finger-ends. He's a kind of combination of Julius Caesar,
+Lucifer and Chauncey Depew done in sepia. Polite and grim--that's his
+way. The room I saw him in was about ten acres big, and looked like
+a Mississippi steamboat with its gilding and mirrors and white paint.
+He talks English better than I can ever hope to. The matter of the
+price came up. I mentioned ten thousand. I expected him to call the
+guard and have me taken out and shot. He didn't move an eyelash. He
+just waved one of his chestnut hands in a careless way, and said,
+'Whatever you say.' I am to go back to-morrow and discuss with him
+the details of the picture."
+
+Keogh hung his head. Self-abasement was easy to read in his downcast
+countenance.
+
+"I'm failing, Carry," he said, sorrowfully. "I'm not fit to handle
+these man's-size schemes any longer. Peddling oranges in a push-cart
+is about the suitable graft for me. When I said ten thousand, I
+swear I thought I had sized up that brown man's limit to within
+two cents. He'd have melted down for fifteen thousand just as easy.
+Say--Carry--you'll see old man Keogh safe in some nice, quiet idiot
+asylum, won't you, if he makes a break like that again?"
+
+The Casa Morena, although only one story in height, was a building of
+brown stone, luxurious as a palace in its interior. It stood on a low
+hill in a walled garden of splendid tropical flora at the upper edge
+of Coralio. The next day the president's carriage came again for the
+artist. Keogh went out for a walk along the beach, where he and his
+"picture box" were now familiar sights. When he returned to the hotel
+White was sitting in a steamer-chair on the balcony.
+
+"Well," said Keogh, "did you and His Nibs decide on the kind of a
+chromo he wants?"
+
+White got up and walked back and forth on the balcony a few times.
+Then he stopped, and laughed strangely. His face was flushed, and his
+eyes were bright with a kind of angry amusement.
+
+"Look here, Billy," he said, somewhat roughly, "when you first came
+to me in my studio and mentioned a picture, I thought you wanted a
+Smashed Oats or a Hair Tonic poster painted on a range of mountains
+or the side of a continent. Well, either of those jobs would have
+been Art in its highest form compared to the one you've steered me
+against. I can't paint that picture, Billy. You've got to let me
+out. Let me try to tell you what that barbarian wants. He had it
+all planned out and even a sketch made of his idea. The old boy
+doesn't draw badly at all. But, ye goddesses of Art! listen to the
+monstrosity he expects me to paint. He wants himself in the centre
+of the canvas, of course. He is to be painted as Jupiter sitting
+on Olympus, with the clouds at his feet. At one side of him stands
+George Washington, in full regimentals, with his hand on the
+president's shoulder. An angel with outstretched wings hovers
+overhead, and is placing a laurel wreath on the president's head,
+crowning him--Queen of the May, I suppose. In the background is to
+be cannon, more angels and soldiers. The man who would paint that
+picture would have to have the soul of a dog, and would deserve to go
+down into oblivion without even a tin can tied to his tail to sound
+his memory."
+
+Little beads of moisture crept out all over Billy Keogh's brow. The
+stub of his blue pencil had not figured out a contingency like this.
+The machinery of his plan had run with flattering smoothness until
+now. He dragged another chair upon the balcony, and got White back to
+his seat. He lit his pipe with apparent calm.
+
+"Now, sonny," he said, with gentle grimness, "you and me will have
+an Art to Art talk. You've got your art and I've got mine. Yours is
+the real Pierian stuff that turns up its nose at bock-beer signs and
+oleographs of the Old Mill. Mine's the art of Business. This was my
+scheme, and it worked out like two-and-two. Paint that president man
+as Old King Cole, or Venus, or a landscape, or a fresco, or a bunch
+of lilies, or anything he thinks he looks like. But get the paint on
+the canvas and collect the spoils. You wouldn't throw me down, Carry,
+at this stage of the game. Think of that ten thousand."
+
+"I can't help thinking of it," said White, "and that's what hurts.
+I'm tempted to throw every ideal I ever had down in the mire, and
+steep my soul in infamy by painting that picture. That five thousand
+meant three years of foreign study to me, and I'd almost sell my soul
+for that."
+
+"Now it ain't as bad as that," said Keogh, soothingly. "It's a
+business proposition. It's so much paint and time against money. I
+don't fall in with your idea that that picture would so everlastingly
+jolt the art side of the question. George Washington was all right,
+you know, and nobody could say a word against the angel. I don't
+think so bad of that group. If you was to give Jupiter a pair of
+epaulets and a sword, and kind of work the clouds around to look
+like a blackberry patch, it wouldn't make such a bad battle scene.
+Why, if we hadn't already settled on the price, he ought to pay an
+extra thousand for Washington, and the angel ought to raise it five
+hundred."
+
+"You don't understand, Billy," said White, with an uneasy laugh.
+"Some of us fellows who try to paint have big notions about Art. I
+wanted to paint a picture some day that people would stand before and
+forget that it was made of paint. I wanted it to creep into them like
+a bar of music and mushroom there like a soft bullet. And I wanted
+'em to go away and ask, 'What else has he done?' And I didn't want
+'em to find a thing; not a portrait nor a magazine cover nor an
+illustration nor a drawing of a girl--nothing but _the_ picture.
+That's why I've lived on fried sausages, and tried to keep true
+to myself. I persuaded myself to do this portrait for the chance
+it might give me to study abroad. But this howling, screaming
+caricature! Good Lord! can't you see how it is?"
+
+"Sure," said Keogh, as tenderly as he would have spoken to a child,
+and he laid a long forefinger on White's knee. "I see. It's bad to
+have your art all slugged up like that. I know. You wanted to paint a
+big thing like the panorama of the battle of Gettysburg. But let me
+kalsomine you a little mental sketch to consider. Up to date we're
+out $385.50 on this scheme. Our capital took every cent both of us
+could raise. We've got about enough left to get back to New York on.
+I need my share of that ten thousand. I want to work a copper deal
+in Idaho, and make a hundred thousand. That's the business end of
+the thing. Come down off your art perch, Carry, and let's land that
+hatful of dollars."
+
+"Billy," said White, with an effort, "I'll try. I won't say I'll do
+it, but I'll try. I'll go at it, and put it through if I can."
+
+"That's business," said Keogh heartily. "Good boy! Now, here's
+another thing--rush that picture--crowd it through as quick as you
+can. Get a couple of boys to help you mix the paint if necessary.
+I've picked up some pointers around town. The people here are
+beginning to get sick of Mr. President. They say he's been too free
+with concessions; and they accuse him of trying to make a dicker with
+England to sell out the country. We want that picture done and paid
+for before there's any row."
+
+In the great _patio_ of Casa Morena, the president caused to be
+stretched a huge canvas. Under this White set up his temporary
+studio. For two hours each day the great man sat to him.
+
+White worked faithfully. But, as the work progressed, he had seasons
+of bitter scorn, of infinite self-contempt, of sullen gloom and
+sardonic gaiety. Keogh, with the patience of a great general,
+soothed, coaxed, argued--kept him at the picture.
+
+At the end of a month White announced that the picture was
+completed--Jupiter, Washington, angels, clouds, cannon and all. His
+face was pale and his mouth drawn straight when he told Keogh. He
+said the president was much pleased with it. It was to be hung in
+the National Gallery of Statesmen and Heroes. The artist had been
+requested to return to Casa Morena on the following day to receive
+payment. At the appointed time he left the hotel, silent under his
+friend's joyful talk of their success.
+
+An hour later he walked into the room where Keogh was waiting, threw
+his hat on the floor, and sat upon the table.
+
+"Billy," he said, in strained and labouring tones, "I've a little
+money out West in a small business that my brother is running. It's
+what I've been living on while I've been studying art. I'll draw out
+my share and pay you back what you've lost on this scheme."
+
+"Lost!" exclaimed Keogh, jumping up. "Didn't you get paid for the
+picture?"
+
+"Yes, I got paid," said White. "But just now there isn't any picture,
+and there isn't any pay. If you care to hear about it, here are the
+edifying details. The president and I were looking at the painting.
+His secretary brought a bank draft on New York for ten thousand
+dollars and handed it to me. The moment I touched it I went wild. I
+tore it into little pieces and threw them on the floor. A workman
+was repainting the pillars inside the _patio_. A bucket of his paint
+happened to be convenient. I picked up his brush and slapped a quart
+of blue paint all over that ten-thousand-dollar nightmare. I bowed,
+and walked out. The president didn't move or speak. That was one time
+he was taken by surprise. It's tough on you, Billy, but I couldn't
+help it."
+
+There seemed to be excitement in Coralio. Outside there was a
+confused, rising murmur pierced by high-pitched cries. "_Bajo el
+traidor--Muerte el traidor!_" were the words they seemed to form.
+
+"Listen to that!" exclaimed White, bitterly: "I know that much
+Spanish. They're shouting, 'Down with the traitor!' I heard them
+before. I felt that they meant me. I was a traitor to Art. The
+picture had to go."
+
+"'Down with the blank fool' would have suited your case better," said
+Keogh, with fiery emphasis. "You tear up ten thousand dollars like an
+old rag because the way you've spread on five dollars' worth of paint
+hurts your conscience. Next time I pick a side-partner in a scheme
+the man has got to go before a notary and swear he never even heard
+the word 'ideal' mentioned."
+
+Keogh strode from the room, white-hot. White paid little attention
+to his resentment. The scorn of Billy Keogh seemed a trifling thing
+beside the greater self-scorn he had escaped.
+
+In Coralio the excitement waxed. An outburst was imminent. The cause
+of this demonstration of displeasure was the presence in the town of
+a big, pink-cheeked Englishman, who, it was said, was an agent of his
+government come to clinch the bargain by which the president placed
+his people in the hands of a foreign power. It was charged that not
+only had he given away priceless concessions, but that the public
+debt was to be transferred into the hands of the English, and the
+custom-houses turned over to them as a guarantee. The long-enduring
+people had determined to make their protest felt.
+
+On that night, in Coralio and in other towns, their ire found vent.
+Yelling mobs, mercurial but dangerous, roamed the streets. They
+overthrew the great bronze statue of the president that stood in the
+centre of the plaza, and hacked it to shapeless pieces. They tore
+from public buildings the tablets set there proclaiming the glory
+of the "Illustrious Liberator." His pictures in the government
+offices were demolished. The mobs even attacked the Casa Morena, but
+were driven away by the military, which remained faithful to the
+executive. All the night terror reigned.
+
+The greatness of Losada was shown by the fact that by noon the
+next day order was restored, and he was still absolute. He issued
+proclamations denying positively that any negotiations of any
+kind had been entered into with England. Sir Stafford Vaughn, the
+pink-cheeked Englishman, also declared in placards and in public
+print that his presence there had no international significance. He
+was a traveller without guile. In fact (so he stated), he had not
+even spoken with the president or been in his presence since his
+arrival.
+
+During this disturbance, White was preparing for his homeward voyage
+in the steamship that was to sail within two or three days. About
+noon, Keogh, the restless, took his camera out with the hope of
+speeding the lagging hours. The town was now as quiet as if peace had
+never departed from her perch on the red-tiled roofs.
+
+About the middle of the afternoon, Keogh hurried back to the hotel
+with something decidedly special in his air. He retired to the little
+room where he developed his pictures.
+
+Later on he came out to White on the balcony, with a luminous, grim,
+predatory smile on his face.
+
+"Do you know what that is?" he asked, holding up a 4 x 5 photograph
+mounted on cardboard.
+
+"Snap-shot of a senorita sitting in the sand--alliteration
+unintentional," guessed White, lazily.
+
+"Wrong," said Keogh with shining eyes. "It's a slung-shot. It's a can
+of dynamite. It's a gold mine. It's a sight-draft on your president
+man for twenty thousand dollars--yes, sir--twenty thousand this time,
+and no spoiling the picture. No ethics of art in the way. Art! You
+with your smelly little tubes! I've got you skinned to death with a
+kodak. Take a look at that."
+
+White took the picture in his hand, and gave a long whistle.
+
+"Jove!" he exclaimed, "but wouldn't that stir up a row in town if you
+let it be seen. How in the world did you get it, Billy?"
+
+"You know that high wall around the president man's back garden?
+I was up there trying to get a bird's-eye of the town. I happened
+to notice a chink in the wall where a stone and a lot of plaster
+had slid out. Thinks I, I'll take a peep through to see how Mr.
+President's cabbages are growing. The first thing I saw was him and
+this Sir Englishman sitting at a little table about twenty feet away.
+They had the table all spread over with documents, and they were
+hobnobbing over them as thick as two pirates. 'Twas a nice corner
+of the garden, all private and shady with palms and orange trees,
+and they had a pail of champagne set by handy in the grass. I knew
+then was the time for me to make my big hit in Art. So I raised the
+machine up to the crack, and pressed the button. Just as I did so
+them old boys shook hands on the deal--you see they took that way in
+the picture."
+
+Keogh put on his coat and hat.
+
+"What are you going to do with it?" asked White.
+
+"Me," said Keogh in a hurt tone, "why, I'm going to tie a pink ribbon
+to it and hang it on the what-not, of course. I'm surprised at
+you. But while I'm out you just try to figure out what ginger-cake
+potentate would be most likely to want to buy this work of art for
+his private collection--just to keep it out of circulation."
+
+The sunset was reddening the tops of the cocoanut palms when
+Billy Keogh came back from Casa Morena. He nodded to the artist's
+questioning gaze; and lay down on a cot with his hands under the back
+of his head.
+
+"I saw him. He paid the money like a little man. They didn't want to
+let me in at first. I told 'em it was important. Yes, that president
+man is on the plenty-able list. He's got a beautiful business system
+about the way he uses his brains. All I had to do was to hold
+up the photograph so he could see it, and name the price. He
+just smiled, and walked over to a safe and got the cash. Twenty
+one-thousand-dollar brand-new United States Treasury notes he laid
+on the table, like I'd pay out a dollar and a quarter. Fine notes,
+too--they crackled with a sound like burning the brush off a ten-acre
+lot."
+
+"Let's try the feel of one," said White, curiously. "I never saw a
+thousand-dollar bill." Keogh did not immediately respond.
+
+"Carry," he said, in an absent-minded way, "you think a heap of your
+art, don't you?"
+
+"More," said White, frankly, "than has been for the financial good of
+myself and my friends."
+
+"I thought you were a fool the other day," went on Keogh, quietly,
+"and I'm not sure now that you wasn't. But if you was, so am I. I've
+been in some funny deals, Carry, but I've always managed to scramble
+fair, and match my brains and capital against the other fellow's. But
+when it comes to--well, when you've got the other fellow cinched,
+and the screws on him, and he's got to put up--why, it don't strike
+me as being a man's game. They've got a name for it, you know;
+it's--confound you, don't you understand? A fellow feels--it's
+something like that blamed art of yours--he--well, I tore that
+photograph up and laid the pieces on that stack of money and shoved
+the whole business back across the table. 'Excuse me, Mr. Losada,'
+I said, 'but I guess I've made a mistake in the price. You get the
+photo for nothing.' Now, Carry, you get out the pencil, and we'll do
+some more figuring. I'd like to save enough out of our capital for
+you to have some fried sausages in your joint when you get back to
+New York."
+
+
+
+
+XV
+
+DICKY
+
+
+There is little consecutiveness along the Spanish Main. Things happen
+there intermittently. Even Time seems to hang his scythe daily on the
+branch of an orange tree while he takes a siesta and a cigarette.
+
+After the ineffectual revolt against the administration of President
+Losada, the country settled again into quiet toleration of the abuses
+with which he had been charged. In Coralio old political enemies
+went arm-in-arm, lightly eschewing for the time all differences of
+opinion.
+
+The failure of the art expedition did not stretch the cat-footed
+Keogh upon his back. The ups and downs of Fortune made smooth
+travelling for his nimble steps. His blue pencil stub was at work
+again before the smoke of the steamer on which White sailed had
+cleared away from the horizon. He had but to speak a word to Geddie
+to find his credit negotiable for whatever goods he wanted from the
+store of Brannigan & Company. On the same day on which White arrived
+in New York Keogh, at the rear of a train of five pack mules loaded
+with hardware and cutlery, set his face toward the grim, interior
+mountains. There the Indian tribes wash gold dust from the auriferous
+streams; and when a market is brought to them trading is brisk and
+_muy bueno_ in the Cordilleras.
+
+In Coralio Time folded his wings and paced wearily along his drowsy
+path. They who had most cheered the torpid hours were gone. Clancy
+had sailed on a Spanish barque for Colon, contemplating a cut across
+the isthmus and then a further voyage to end at Calao, where the
+fighting was said to be on. Geddie, whose quiet and genial nature had
+once served to mitigate the frequent dull reaction of lotus eating,
+was now a home-man, happy with his bright orchid, Paula, and never
+even dreaming of or regretting the unsolved, sealed and monogramed
+Bottle whose contents, now inconsiderable, were held safely in the
+keeping of the sea.
+
+Well may the Walrus, most discerning and eclectic of beasts, place
+sealing-wax midway on his programme of topics that fall pertinent and
+diverting upon the ear.
+
+Atwood was gone--he of the hospitable back porch and ingenuous
+cunning. Dr. Gregg, with his trepanning story smouldering within him,
+was a whiskered volcano, always showing signs of imminent eruption,
+and was not to be considered in the ranks of those who might
+contribute to the amelioration of ennui. The new consul's note chimed
+with the sad sea waves and the violent tropical greens--he had not a
+bar of Scheherezade or of the Round Table in his lute. Goodwin was
+employed with large projects: what time he was loosed from them found
+him at his home, where he loved to be. Therefore it will be seen that
+there was a dearth of fellowship and entertainment among the foreign
+contingent of Coralio.
+
+And then Dicky Maloney dropped down from the clouds upon the town,
+and amused it.
+
+Nobody knew where Dicky Maloney hailed from or how he reached
+Coralio. He appeared there one day; and that was all. He afterward
+said that he came on the fruit steamer _Thor_; but an inspection of
+the _Thor's_ passenger list of that date was found to be Maloneyless.
+Curiosity, however, soon perished; and Dicky took his place among the
+odd fish cast up by the Caribbean.
+
+He was an active, devil-may-care, rollicking fellow with an engaging
+gray eye, the most irresistible grin, a rather dark or much sunburned
+complexion, and a head of the fieriest red hair ever seen in that
+country. Speaking the Spanish language as well as he spoke English,
+and seeming always to have plenty of silver in his pockets, it was
+not long before he was a welcome companion whithersoever he went. He
+had an extreme fondness for _vino blanco_, and gained the reputation
+of being able to drink more of it than any three men in town.
+Everybody called him "Dicky"; everybody cheered up at the sight of
+him--especially the natives, to whom his marvellous red hair and his
+free-and-easy style were a constant delight and envy. Wherever you
+went in the town you would soon see Dicky or hear his genial laugh,
+and find around him a group of admirers who appreciated him both for
+his good nature and the white wine he was always so ready to buy.
+
+A considerable amount of speculation was had concerning the object of
+his sojourn there, until one day he silenced this by opening a small
+shop for the sale of tobacco, _dulces_ and the handiwork of the
+interior Indians--fibre-and-silk-woven goods, deerskin _zapatos_ and
+basketwork of _tule_ reeds. Even then he did not change his habits;
+for he was drinking and playing cards half the day and night with the
+_comandante_, the collector of customs, the _Jefe Politico_ and other
+gay dogs among the native officials.
+
+One day Dicky saw Pasa, the daughter of Madama Ortiz, sitting in the
+side-door of the Hotel de los Estranjeros. He stopped in his tracks,
+still, for the first time in Coralio; and then he sped, swift as a
+deer, to find Vasquez, a gilded native youth, to present him.
+
+The young men had named Pasa "_La Santita Naranjadita_."
+_Naranjadita_ is a Spanish word for a certain colour that you must go
+to more trouble to describe in English. By saying "The little saint,
+tinted the most beautiful-delicate-slightly-orange-golden," you will
+approximate the description of Madama Ortiz's daughter.
+
+La Madama Ortiz sold rum in addition to other liquors. Now, you must
+know that the rum expiates whatever opprobrium attends upon the other
+commodities. For rum-making, mind you, is a government monopoly;
+and to keep a government dispensary assures respectability if not
+preeminence. Moreover, the saddest of precisians could find no fault
+with the conduct of the shop. Customers drank there in the lowest of
+spirits and fearsomely, as in the shadow of the dead; for Madama's
+ancient and vaunted lineage counteracted even the rum's behest to be
+merry. For, was she not of the Iglesias, who landed with Pizarro? And
+had not her deceased husband been _comisionado de caminos y puentes_
+for the district?
+
+In the evenings Pasa sat by the window in the room next to the one
+where they drank, and strummed dreamily upon her guitar. And then,
+by twos and threes, would come visiting young caballeros and occupy
+the prim line of chairs set against the wall of this room. They were
+there to besiege the heart of "_La Santita_." Their method (which is
+not proof against intelligent competition) consisted of expanding the
+chest, looking valorous, and consuming a gross or two of cigarettes.
+Even saints delicately oranged prefer to be wooed differently.
+
+Dona Pasa would tide over the vast chasms of nicotinized silence
+with music from her guitar, while she wondered if the romances she
+had read about gallant and more--more contiguous cavaliers were all
+lies. At somewhat regular intervals Madama would glide in from the
+dispensary with a sort of drought-suggesting gleam in her eye, and
+there would be a rustling of stiffly-starched white trousers as one
+of the caballeros would propose an adjournment to the bar.
+
+That Dicky Maloney would, sooner or later, explore this field was a
+thing to be foreseen. There were few doors in Coralio into which his
+red head had not been poked.
+
+In an incredibly short space of time after his first sight of her
+he was there, seated close beside her rocking chair. There were no
+back-against-the-wall poses in Dicky's theory of wooing. His plan of
+subjection was an attack at close range. To carry the fortress with
+one concentrated, ardent, eloquent, irresistible _escalade_--that was
+Dicky's way.
+
+Pasa was descended from the proudest Spanish families in the country.
+Moreover, she had had unusual advantages. Two years in a New Orleans
+school had elevated her ambitions and fitted her for a fate above the
+ordinary maidens of her native land. And yet here she succumbed to
+the first red-haired scamp with a glib tongue and a charming smile
+that came along and courted her properly.
+
+Very soon Dicky took her to the little church on the corner of the
+plaza, and "Mrs. Maloney" was added to her string of distinguished
+names.
+
+And it was her fate to sit, with her patient, saintly eyes and figure
+like a bisque Psyche, behind the sequestered counter of the little
+shop, while Dicky drank and philandered with his frivolous
+acquaintances.
+
+The women, with their naturally fine instinct, saw a chance for
+vivisection, and delicately taunted her with his habits. She turned
+upon them in a beautiful, steady blaze of sorrowful contempt.
+
+"You meat-cows," she said, in her level, crystal-clear tones; "you
+know nothing of a man. Your men are _maromeros_. They are fit only to
+roll cigarettes in the shade until the sun strikes and shrivels them
+up. They drone in your hammocks and you comb their hair and feed
+them with fresh fruit. My man is of no such blood. Let him drink of
+the wine. When he has taken sufficient of it to drown one of your
+_flaccitos_ he will come home to me more of a man than one thousand
+of your _pobrecitos_. _My_ hair he smooths and braids; to me he
+sings; he himself removes my _zapatos_, and there, there, upon each
+instep leaves a kiss. He holds-- Oh, you will never understand! Blind
+ones who have never known a _man_."
+
+Sometimes mysterious things happened at night about Dicky's shop.
+While the front of it was dark, in the little room back of it Dicky
+and a few of his friends would sit about a table carrying on some
+kind of very quiet _negocios_ until quite late. Finally he would let
+them out the front door very carefully, and go upstairs to his little
+saint. These visitors were generally conspirator-like men with dark
+clothes and hats. Of course, these dark doings were noticed after a
+while, and talked about.
+
+Dicky seemed to care nothing at all for the society of the alien
+residents of the town. He avoided Goodwin, and his skilful escape
+from the trepanning story of Dr. Gregg is still referred to, in
+Coralio, as a masterpiece of lightning diplomacy.
+
+Many letters arrived, addressed to "Mr. Dicky Maloney," or "Senor
+Dickee Maloney," to the considerable pride of Pasa. That so many
+people should desire to write to him only confirmed her own suspicion
+that the light from his red head shone around the world. As to their
+contents she never felt curiosity. There was a wife for you!
+
+The one mistake Dicky made in Coralio was to run out of money at the
+wrong time. Where his money came from was a puzzle, for the sales
+of his shop were next to nothing, but that source failed, and at a
+peculiarly unfortunate time. It was when the _comandante_, Don Senor
+el Coronel Encarnacion Rios, looked upon the little saint seated in
+the shop and felt his heart go pitapat.
+
+The _comandante_, who was versed in all the intricate arts of
+gallantry, first delicately hinted at his sentiments by donning his
+dress uniform and strutting up and down fiercely before her window.
+Pasa, glancing demurely with her saintly eyes, instantly perceived
+his resemblance to her parrot, Chichi, and was diverted to the extent
+of a smile. The _comandante_ saw the smile, which was not intended
+for him. Convinced of an impression made, he entered the shop,
+confidently, and advanced to open compliment. Pasa froze; he pranced;
+she flamed royally; he was charmed to injudicious persistence; she
+commanded him to leave the shop; he tried to capture her hand,--and
+Dicky entered, smiling broadly, full of white wine and the devil.
+
+He spent five minutes in punishing the _comandante_ scientifically
+and carefully, so that the pain might be prolonged as far as
+possible. At the end of that time he pitched the rash wooer out the
+door upon the stones of the street, senseless.
+
+A barefooted policeman who had been watching the affair from across
+the street blew a whistle. A squad of four soldiers came running from
+the _cuartel_ around the corner. When they saw that the offender
+was Dicky, they stopped, and blew more whistles, which brought out
+reenforcements of eight. Deeming the odds against them sufficiently
+reduced, the military advanced upon the disturber.
+
+Dicky, being thoroughly imbued with the martial spirit, stooped
+and drew the _comandante's_ sword, which was girded about him, and
+charged his foe. He chased the standing army four squares, playfully
+prodding its squealing rear and hacking at its ginger-coloured heels.
+
+But he was not so successful with the civic authorities. Six
+muscular, nimble policemen overpowered him and conveyed him,
+triumphantly but warily, to jail. "_El Diablo Colorado_" they dubbed
+him, and derided the military for its defeat.
+
+Dicky, with the rest of the prisoners, could look out through
+the barred door at the grass of the little plaza, at a row of
+orange trees and the red tile roofs and 'dobe walls of a line of
+insignificant stores.
+
+At sunset along a path across this plaza came a melancholy procession
+of sad-faced women bearing plantains, cassaba, bread and fruit--each
+coming with food to some wretch behind those bars to whom she still
+clung and furnished the means of life. Twice a day--morning and
+evening--they were permitted to come. Water was furnished to her
+compulsory guests by the republic, but no food.
+
+That evening Dicky's name was called by the sentry, and he stepped
+before the bars of the door. There stood his little saint, a black
+mantilla draped about her head and shoulders, her face like glorified
+melancholy, her clear eyes gazing longingly at him as if they might
+draw him between the bars to her. She brought a chicken, some
+oranges, _dulces_ and a loaf of white bread. A soldier inspected the
+food, and passed it in to Dicky. Pasa spoke calmly, as she always
+did, briefly, in her thrilling, flute-like tones. "Angel of my life,"
+she said, "let it not be long that thou art away from me. Thou
+knowest that life is not a thing to be endured with thou not at
+my side. Tell me if I can do aught in this matter. If not, I will
+wait--a little while. I come again in the morning."
+
+Dicky, with his shoes removed so as not to disturb his fellow
+prisoners, tramped the floor of the jail half the night condemning
+his lack of money and the cause of it--whatever that might have been.
+He knew very well that money would have bought his release at once.
+
+For two days succeeding Pasa came at the appointed times and brought
+him food. He eagerly inquired each time if a letter or package had
+come for him, and she mournfully shook her head.
+
+On the morning of the third day she brought only a small loaf of
+bread. There were dark circles under her eyes. She seemed as calm as
+ever.
+
+"By jingo," said Dicky, who seemed to speak in English or Spanish as
+the whim seized him, "this is dry provender, _muchachita_. Is this
+the best you can dig up for a fellow?"
+
+Pasa looked at him as a mother looks at a beloved but capricious
+babe.
+
+"Think better of it," she said, in a low voice; "since for the next
+meal there will be nothing. The last _centavo_ is spent." She pressed
+closer against the grating.
+
+"Sell the goods in the shop--take anything for them."
+
+"Have I not tried? Did I not offer them for one-tenth their cost? Not
+even one _peso_ would any one give. There is not one _real_ in this
+town to assist Dickee Malonee."
+
+Dick clenched his teeth grimly. "That's the _comandante_," he
+growled. "He's responsible for that sentiment. Wait, oh, wait till
+the cards are all out."
+
+Pasa lowered her voice to almost a whisper. "And, listen, heart of my
+heart," she said, "I have endeavoured to be brave, but I cannot live
+without thee. Three days now--"
+
+Dicky caught a faint gleam of steel from the folds of her mantilla.
+For once she looked in his face and saw it without a smile, stern,
+menacing and purposeful. Then he suddenly raised his hand and his
+smile came back like a gleam of sunshine. The hoarse signal of an
+incoming steamer's siren sounded in the harbour. Dicky called to the
+sentry who was pacing before the door: "What steamer comes?"
+
+"The _Catarina_."
+
+"Of the Vesuvius line?"
+
+"Without doubt, of that line."
+
+"Go you, _picarilla_," said Dicky joyously to Pasa, "to the American
+consul. Tell him I wish to speak with him. See that he comes at
+once. And look you! let me see a different look in those eyes, for I
+promise your head shall rest upon this arm to-night."
+
+It was an hour before the consul came. He held his green umbrella
+under his arm, and mopped his forehead impatiently.
+
+"Now, see here, Maloney," he began, captiously, "you fellows seem to
+think you can cut up any kind of row, and expect me to pull you out
+of it. I'm neither the War Department nor a gold mine. This country
+has its laws, you know, and there's one against pounding the senses
+out of the regular army. You Irish are forever getting into trouble.
+I don't see what I can do. Anything like tobacco, now, to make you
+comfortable--or newspapers--"
+
+"Son of Eli," interrupted Dicky, gravely, "you haven't changed an
+iota. That is almost a duplicate of the speech you made when old
+Koen's donkeys and geese got into the chapel loft, and the culprits
+wanted to hide in your room."
+
+"Oh, heavens!" exclaimed the consul, hurriedly adjusting his
+spectacles. "Are you a Yale man, too? Were you in that crowd? I don't
+seem to remember any one with red--any one named Maloney. Such a lot
+of college men seem to have misused their advantages. One of the best
+mathematicians of the class of '91 is selling lottery tickets in
+Belize. A Cornell man dropped off here last month. He was second
+steward on a guano boat. I'll write to the department if you like,
+Maloney. Or if there's any tobacco, or newspa--"
+
+"There's nothing," interrupted Dicky, shortly, "but this. You go tell
+the captain of the _Catarina_ that Dicky Maloney wants to see him as
+soon as he can conveniently come. Tell him where I am. Hurry. That's
+all."
+
+The consul, glad to be let off so easily, hurried away. The captain
+of the _Catarina_, a stout man, Sicilian born, soon appeared,
+shoving, with little ceremony, through the guards to the jail door.
+The Vesuvius Fruit Company had a habit of doing things that way in
+Anchuria.
+
+"I am exceedingly sorry--exceedingly sorry," said the captain, "to
+see this occur. I place myself at your service, Mr. Maloney. What you
+need shall be furnished. Whatever you say shall be done."
+
+Dicky looked at him unsmilingly. His red hair could not detract from
+his attitude of severe dignity as he stood, tall and calm, with his
+now grim mouth forming a horizontal line.
+
+"Captain De Lucco, I believe I still have funds in the hands of your
+company--ample and personal funds. I ordered a remittance last week.
+The money has not arrived. You know what is needed in this game.
+Money and money and more money. Why has it not been sent?"
+
+"By the _Cristobal_," replied De Lucco, gesticulating, "it was
+despatched. Where is the _Cristobal_? Off Cape Antonio I spoke her
+with a broken shaft. A tramp coaster was towing her back to New
+Orleans. I brought money ashore thinking your need for it might not
+withstand delay. In this envelope is one thousand dollars. There is
+more if you need it, Mr. Maloney."
+
+"For the present it will suffice," said Dicky, softening as he
+crinkled the envelope and looked down at the half-inch thickness of
+smooth, dingy bills.
+
+"The long green!" he said, gently, with a new reverence in his gaze.
+"Is there anything it will not buy, Captain?"
+
+"I had three friends," replied De Lucco, who was a bit of a
+philosopher, "who had money. One of them speculated in stocks and
+made ten million; another is in heaven, and the third married a poor
+girl whom he loved."
+
+"The answer, then," said Dicky, "is held by the Almighty, Wall Street
+and Cupid. So, the question remains."
+
+"This," queried the captain, including Dicky's surroundings in
+a significant gesture of his hand, "is it--it is not--it is not
+connected with the business of your little shop? There is no failure
+in your plans?"
+
+"No, no," said Dicky. "This is merely the result of a little private
+affair of mine, a digression from the regular line of business. They
+say for a complete life a man must know poverty, love and war. But
+they don't go well together, _capitan mio_. No; there is no failure
+in my business. The little shop is doing very well."
+
+When the captain had departed Dicky called the sergeant of the jail
+squad and asked:
+
+"Am I _preso_ by the military or by the civil authority?"
+
+"Surely there is no martial law in effect now, senor."
+
+"_Bueno_. Now go or send to the alcalde, the _Jues de la Paz_ and the
+_Jefe de los Policios_. Tell them I am prepared at once to satisfy
+the demands of justice." A folded bill of the "long green" slid into
+the sergeant's hand.
+
+Then Dicky's smile came back again, for he knew that the hours of his
+captivity were numbered; and he hummed, in time with the sentry's
+tread:
+
+
+ "_They're hanging men and women now,
+ For lacking of the green._"
+
+
+So, that night Dicky sat by the window of the room over his shop
+and his little saint sat close by, working at something silken and
+dainty. Dicky was thoughtful and grave. His red hair was in an
+unusual state of disorder. Pasa's fingers often ached to smooth and
+arrange it, but Dicky would never allow it. He was poring, to-night,
+over a great litter of maps and books and papers on his table until
+that perpendicular line came between his brows that always distressed
+Pasa. Presently she went and brought his hat, and stood with it until
+he looked up, inquiringly.
+
+"It is sad for you here," she explained. "Go out and drink _vino
+blanco_. Come back when you get that smile you used to wear. That is
+what I wish to see."
+
+Dicky laughed and threw down his papers. "The _vino blanco_ stage
+is past. It has served its turn. Perhaps, after all, there was less
+entered my mouth and more my ears than people thought. But, there
+will be no more maps or frowns to-night. I promise you that. Come."
+
+They sat upon a reed _silleta_ at the window and watched the
+quivering gleams from the lights of the _Catarina_ reflected in the
+harbour.
+
+Presently Pasa rippled out one of her infrequent chirrups of audible
+laughter.
+
+"I was thinking," she began, anticipating Dicky's question, "of the
+foolish things girls have in their minds. Because I went to school
+in the States I used to have ambitions. Nothing less than to be the
+president's wife would satisfy me. And, look, thou red picaroon, to
+what obscure fate thou hast stolen me!"
+
+"Don't give up hope," said Dicky, smiling. "More than one Irishman
+has been the ruler of a South American country. There was a dictator
+of Chili named O'Higgins. Why not a President Maloney, of Anchuria?
+Say the word, _santita mia_, and we'll make the race."
+
+"No, no, no, thou red-haired, reckless one!" sighed Pasa; "I am
+content"--she laid her head against his arm--"here."
+
+
+
+
+XVI
+
+ROUGE ET NOIR
+
+
+It has been indicated that disaffection followed the elevation of
+Losada to the presidency. This feeling continued to grow. Throughout
+the entire republic there seemed to be a spirit of silent, sullen
+discontent. Even the old Liberal party to which Goodwin, Zavalla and
+other patriots had lent their aid was disappointed. Losada had failed
+to become a popular idol. Fresh taxes, fresh import duties and, more
+than all, his tolerance of the outrageous oppression of citizens by
+the military had rendered him the most obnoxious president since
+the despicable Alforan. The majority of his own cabinet were out
+of sympathy with him. The army, which he had courted by giving it
+license to tyrannize, had been his main, and thus far adequate
+support.
+
+But the most impolitic of the administration's moves had been when it
+antagonized the Vesuvius Fruit Company, an organization plying twelve
+steamers and with a cash capital somewhat larger than Anchuria's
+surplus and debt combined.
+
+Reasonably an established concern like the Vesuvius would become
+irritated at having a small, retail republic with no rating at all
+attempt to squeeze it. So when the government proxies applied for
+a subsidy they encountered a polite refusal. The president at once
+retaliated by clapping an export duty of one _real_ per bunch on
+bananas--a thing unprecedented in fruit-growing countries. The
+Vesuvius Company had invested large sums in wharves and plantations
+along the Anchurian coast, their agents had erected fine homes in the
+towns where they had their headquarters, and heretofore had worked
+with the republic in good-will and with advantage to both. It would
+lose an immense sum if compelled to move out. The selling price
+of bananas from Vera Cruz to Trinidad was three _reals_ per bunch.
+This new duty of one _real_ would have ruined the fruit growers in
+Anchuria and have seriously discommoded the Vesuvius Company had it
+declined to pay it. But for some reason, the Vesuvius continued to
+buy Anchurian fruit, paying four _reals_ for it; and not suffering
+the growers to bear the loss.
+
+This apparent victory deceived His Excellency; and he began to hunger
+for more of it. He sent an emissary to request a conference with a
+representative of the fruit company. The Vesuvius sent Mr. Franzoni,
+a little, stout, cheerful man, always cool, and whistling airs from
+Verdi's operas. Senor Espirition, of the office of the Minister of
+Finance, attempted the sandbagging in behalf of Anchuria. The meeting
+took place in the cabin of the _Salvador_, of the Vesuvius line.
+
+Senor Espirition opened negotiations by announcing that the
+government contemplated the building of a railroad to skirt the
+alluvial coast lands. After touching upon the benefits such a road
+would confer upon the interests of the Vesuvius, he reached the
+definite suggestion that a contribution to the road's expenses of,
+say, fifty thousand _pesos_ would not be more than an equivalent to
+benefits received.
+
+Mr. Franzoni denied that his company would receive any benefits
+from a contemplated road. As its representative he must decline
+to contribute fifty thousand _pesos_. But he would assume the
+responsibility of offering twenty-five.
+
+Did Senor Espirition understand Senor Franzoni to mean twenty-five
+thousand _pesos_?
+
+By no means. Twenty-five _pesos_. And in silver; not in gold.
+
+"Your offer insults my government," cried Senor Espirition, rising
+with indignation.
+
+"Then," said Mr. Franzoni, in warning tone, "_we will change it_."
+
+The offer was never changed. Could Mr. Franzoni have meant the
+government?
+
+This was the state of affairs in Anchuria when the winter season
+opened at Coralio at the end of the second year of Losada's
+administration. So, when the government and society made its annual
+exodus to the seashore it was evident that the presidential advent
+would not be celebrated by unlimited rejoicing. The tenth of November
+was the day set for the entrance into Coralio of the gay company
+from the capital. A narrow-gauge railroad runs twenty miles into the
+interior from Solitas. The government party travels by carriage from
+San Mateo to this road's terminal point, and proceeds by train to
+Solitas. From here they march in grand procession to Coralio where,
+on the day of their coming, festivities and ceremonies abound. But
+this season saw an ominous dawning of the tenth of November.
+
+Although the rainy season was over, the day seemed to hark back to
+reeking June. A fine drizzle of rain fell all during the forenoon.
+The procession entered Coralio amid a strange silence.
+
+President Losada was an elderly man, grizzly bearded, with a
+considerable ratio of Indian blood revealed in his cinnamon
+complexion. His carriage headed the procession, surrounded and
+guarded by Captain Cruz and his famous troop of one hundred light
+horse "_El Ciento Huilando_." Colonel Rocas followed, with a regiment
+of the regular army.
+
+The president's sharp, beady eyes glanced about him for the expected
+demonstration of welcome; but he faced a stolid, indifferent array of
+citizens. Sight-seers the Anchurians are by birth and habit, and they
+turned out to their last able-bodied unit to witness the scene; but
+they maintained an accusive silence. They crowded the streets to the
+very wheel ruts; they covered the red tile roofs to the eaves, but
+there was never a "_viva_" from them. No wreaths of palm and lemon
+branches or gorgeous strings of paper roses hung from the windows and
+balconies as was the custom. There was an apathy, a dull, dissenting
+disapprobation, that was the more ominous because it puzzled. No
+one feared an outburst, a revolt of the discontents, for they had
+no leader. The president and those loyal to him had never even
+heard whispered a name among them capable of crystallizing the
+dissatisfaction into opposition. No, there could be no danger. The
+people always procured a new idol before they destroyed an old one.
+
+At length, after a prodigious galloping and curvetting of red-sashed
+majors, gold-laced colonels and epauletted generals, the procession
+formed for its annual progress down the Calle Grande to the Casa
+Morena, where the ceremony of welcome to the visiting president
+always took place.
+
+The Swiss band led the line of march. After it pranced the local
+_comandante_, mounted, and a detachment of his troops. Next came a
+carriage with four members of the cabinet, conspicuous among them
+the Minister of War, old General Pilar, with his white moustache and
+his soldierly bearing. Then the president's vehicle, containing also
+the Ministers of Finance and State; and surrounded by Captain Cruz's
+light horse formed in a close double file of fours. Following them,
+the rest of the officials of state, the judges and distinguished
+military and social ornaments of public and private life.
+
+As the band struck up, and the movement began, like a bird of
+ill-omen the _Valhalla_, the swiftest steamship of the Vesuvius line,
+glided into the harbour in plain view of the president and his train.
+Of course, there was nothing menacing about its arrival--a business
+firm does not go to war with a nation--but it reminded Senor
+Espirition and others in those carriages that the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company was undoubtedly carrying something up its sleeve for them.
+
+By the time the van of the procession had reached the government
+building, Captain Cronin, of the _Valhalla_, and Mr. Vincenti, member
+of the Vesuvius Company, had landed and were pushing their way,
+bluff, hearty and nonchalant, through the crowd on the narrow
+sidewalk. Clad in white linen, big, debonair, with an air of
+good-humoured authority, they made conspicuous figures among the
+dark mass of unimposing Anchurians, as they penetrated to within a
+few yards of the steps of the Casa Morena. Looking easily above the
+heads of the crowd, they perceived another that towered above the
+undersized natives. It was the fiery poll of Dicky Maloney against
+the wall close by the lower step; and his broad, seductive grin
+showed that he recognized their presence.
+
+Dicky had attired himself becomingly for the festive occasion in a
+well-fitting black suit. Pasa was close by his side, her head covered
+with the ubiquitous black mantilla.
+
+Mr. Vincenti looked at her attentively.
+
+"Botticelli's Madonna," he remarked, gravely. "I wonder when she got
+into the game. I don't like his getting tangled with the women. I
+hoped he would keep away from them."
+
+Captain Cronin's laugh almost drew attention from the parade.
+
+"With that head of hair! Keep away from the women! And a Maloney!
+Hasn't he got a license? But, nonsense aside, what do you think of
+the prospects? It's a species of filibustering out of my line."
+
+Vincenti glanced again at Dicky's head and smiled.
+
+"_Rouge et noir_," he said. "There you have it. Make your play,
+gentlemen. Our money is on the red."
+
+"The lad's game," said Cronin, with a commending look at the tall,
+easy figure by the steps. "But 'tis all like fly-by-night theatricals
+to me. The talk's bigger than the stage; there's a smell of gasoline
+in the air, and they're their own audience and scene-shifters."
+
+They ceased talking, for General Pilar had descended from the first
+carriage and had taken his stand upon the top step of Casa Morena. As
+the oldest member of the cabinet, custom had decreed that he should
+make the address of welcome, presenting the keys of the official
+residence to the president at its close.
+
+General Pilar was one of the most distinguished citizens of the
+republic. Hero of three wars and innumerable revolutions, he was an
+honoured guest at European courts and camps. An eloquent speaker
+and a friend to the people, he represented the highest type of the
+Anchurians.
+
+Holding in his hand the gilt keys of Casa Morena, he began his
+address in a historical form, touching upon each administration
+and the advance of civilization and prosperity from the first dim
+striving after liberty down to present times. Arriving at the
+regime of President Losada, at which point, according to precedent,
+he should have delivered a eulogy upon its wise conduct and the
+happiness of the people, General Pilar paused. Then he silently held
+up the bunch of keys high above his head, with his eyes closely
+regarding it. The ribbon with which they were bound fluttered in the
+breeze.
+
+"It still blows," cried the speaker, exultantly. "Citizens of
+Anchuria, give thanks to the saints this night that our air is still
+free."
+
+Thus disposing of Losada's administration, he abruptly reverted
+to that of Olivarra, Anchuria's most popular ruler. Olivarra had
+been assassinated nine years before while in the prime of life and
+usefulness. A faction of the Liberal party led by Losada himself had
+been accused of the deed. Whether guilty or not, it was eight years
+before the ambitious and scheming Losada had gained his goal.
+
+Upon this theme General Pilar's eloquence was loosed. He drew the
+picture of the beneficent Olivarra with a loving hand. He reminded
+the people of the peace, the security and the happiness they had
+enjoyed during that period. He recalled in vivid detail and with
+significant contrast the last winter sojourn of President Olivarra
+in Coralio, when his appearance at their fiestas was the signal for
+thundering _vivas_ of love and approbation.
+
+The first public expression of sentiment from the people that day
+followed. A low, sustained murmur went among them like the surf
+rolling along the shore.
+
+"Ten dollars to a dinner at the Saint Charles," remarked Mr.
+Vincenti, "that _rouge_ wins."
+
+"I never bet against my own interests," said Captain Cronin, lighting
+a cigar. "Long-winded old boy, for his age. What's he talking about?"
+
+"My Spanish," replied Vincenti, "runs about ten words to the minute;
+his is something around two hundred. Whatever he's saying, he's
+getting them warmed up."
+
+"Friends and brothers," General Pilar was saying, "could I reach
+out my hand this day across the lamentable silence of the grave to
+Olivarra 'the Good,' to the ruler who was one of you, whose tears
+fell when you sorrowed, and whose smile followed your joy--I would
+bring him back to you, but--Olivarra is dead--dead at the hands of a
+craven assassin!"
+
+The speaker turned and gazed boldly into the carriage of the
+president. His arm remained extended aloft as if to sustain his
+peroration. The president was listening, aghast, at this remarkable
+address of welcome. He was sunk back upon his seat, trembling with
+rage and dumb surprise, his dark hands tightly gripping the carriage
+cushions.
+
+Half rising, he extended one arm toward the speaker, and shouted a
+harsh command at Captain Cruz. The leader of the "Flying Hundred"
+sat his horse, immovable, with folded arms, giving no sign of having
+heard. Losada sank back again, his dark features distinctly paling.
+
+"Who says that Olivarra is dead?" suddenly cried the speaker, his
+voice, old as he was, sounding like a battle trumpet. "His body
+lies in the grave, but to the people he loved he has bequeathed his
+spirit--yes, more--his learning, his courage, his kindness--yes,
+more--his youth, his image--people of Anchuria, have you forgotten
+Ramon, the son of Olivarra?"
+
+Cronin and Vincenti, watching closely, saw Dicky Maloney suddenly
+raise his hat, tear off his shock of red hair, leap up the steps and
+stand at the side of General Pilar. The Minister of War laid his
+arm across the young man's shoulders. All who had known President
+Olivarra saw again his same lion-like pose, the same frank, undaunted
+expression, the same high forehead with the peculiar line of the
+clustering, crisp black hair.
+
+General Pilar was an experienced orator. He seized the moment of
+breathless silence that preceded the storm.
+
+"Citizens of Anchuria," he trumpeted, holding aloft the keys to Casa
+Morena, "I am here to deliver these keys--the keys to your homes and
+liberty--to your chosen president. Shall I deliver them to Enrico
+Olivarra's assassin, or to his son?"
+
+"Olivarra! Olivarra!" the crowd shrieked and howled. All vociferated
+the magic name--men, women, children and the parrots.
+
+And the enthusiasm was not confined to the blood of the plebs.
+Colonel Rocas ascended the steps and laid his sword theatrically at
+young Ramon Olivarra's feet. Four members of the cabinet embraced
+him. Captain Cruz gave a command, and twenty of _El Ciento Huilando_
+dismounted and arranged themselves in a cordon about the steps of
+Casa Morena.
+
+But Ramon Olivarra seized that moment to prove himself a born genius
+and politician. He waved those soldiers aside, and descended the
+steps to the street. There, without losing his dignity or the
+distinguished elegance that the loss of his red hair brought him,
+he took the proletariat to his bosom--the barefooted, the dirty,
+Indians, Caribs, babies, beggars, old, young, saints, soldiers and
+sinners--he missed none of them.
+
+While this act of the drama was being presented, the scene shifters
+had been busy at the duties that had been assigned to them. Two
+of Cruz's dragoons had seized the bridle reins of Losada's horses;
+others formed a close guard around the carriage; and they galloped
+off with the tyrant and his two unpopular Ministers. No doubt a place
+had been prepared for them. There are a number of well-barred stone
+apartments in Coralio.
+
+"_Rouge_ wins," said Mr. Vincenti, calmly lighting another cigar.
+
+Captain Cronin had been intently watching the vicinity of the stone
+steps for some time.
+
+"Good boy!" he exclaimed suddenly, as if relieved. "I wondered if he
+was going to forget his Kathleen Mavourneen."
+
+Young Olivarra had reascended the steps and spoken a few words to
+General Pilar. Then that distinguished veteran descended to the
+ground and approached Pasa, who still stood, wonder-eyed, where Dicky
+had left her. With his plumed hat in his hand, and his medals and
+decorations shining on his breast, the general spoke to her and gave
+her his arm, and they went up the stone steps of the Casa Morena
+together. And then Ramon Olivarra stepped forward and took both her
+hands before all the people.
+
+And while the cheering was breaking out afresh everywhere, Captain
+Cronin and Mr. Vincenti turned and walked back toward the shore where
+the gig was waiting for them.
+
+"There'll be another '_presidente proclamada_' in the morning,"
+said Mr. Vincenti, musingly. "As a rule they are not as reliable as
+the elected ones, but this youngster seems to have some good stuff
+in him. He planned and manoeuvred the entire campaign. Olivarra's
+widow, you know, was wealthy. After her husband was assassinated
+she went to the States, and educated her son at Yale. The Vesuvius
+Company hunted him up, and backed him in the little game."
+
+"It's a glorious thing," said Cronin, half jestingly, "to be able to
+discharge a government, and insert one of your own choosing, in these
+days."
+
+"Oh, it is only a matter of business," said Vincenti, stopping and
+offering the stump of his cigar to a monkey that swung down from a
+lime tree; "and that is what moves the world of to-day. That extra
+_real_ on the price of bananas had to go. We took the shortest way of
+removing it."
+
+
+
+
+XVII
+
+TWO RECALLS
+
+
+There remains three duties to be performed before the curtain falls
+upon the patched comedy. Two have been promised: the third is no less
+obligatory.
+
+It was set forth in the programme of this tropic vaudeville that
+it would be made known why Shorty O'Day, of the Columbia Detective
+Agency, lost his position. Also that Smith should come again to tell
+us what mystery he followed that night on the shores of Anchuria when
+he strewed so many cigar stumps around the cocoanut palm during his
+lonely night vigil on the beach. These things were promised; but a
+bigger thing yet remains to be accomplished--the clearing up of a
+seeming wrong that has been done according to the array of chronicled
+facts (truthfully set forth) that have been presented. And one voice,
+speaking, shall do these three things.
+
+Two men sat on a stringer of a North River pier in the City of New
+York. A steamer from the tropics had begun to unload bananas and
+oranges on the pier. Now and then a banana or two would fall from an
+overripe bunch, and one of the two men would shamble forward, seize
+the fruit and return to share it with his companion.
+
+One of the men was in the ultimate stage of deterioration. As far as
+rain and wind and sun could wreck the garments he wore, it had been
+done. In his person the ravages of drink were as plainly visible. And
+yet, upon his high-bridged, rubicund nose was jauntily perched a pair
+of shining and flawless gold-rimmed glasses.
+
+The other man was not so far gone upon the descending Highway of the
+Incompetents. Truly, the flower of his manhood had gone to seed--seed
+that, perhaps, no soil might sprout. But there were still cross-cuts
+along where he travelled through which he might yet regain the
+pathway of usefulness without disturbing the slumbering Miracles.
+This man was short and compactly built. He had an oblique, dead eye,
+like that of a sting-ray, and the moustache of a cocktail mixer. We
+know the eye and the moustache; we know that Smith of the luxurious
+yacht, the gorgeous raiment, the mysterious mission, the magic
+disappearance, has come again, though shorn of the accessories of his
+former state.
+
+At his third banana, the man with the nose glasses spat it from him
+with a shudder.
+
+"Deuce take all fruit!" he remarked, in a patrician tone of disgust.
+"I lived for two years where these things grow. The memory of their
+taste lingers with you. The oranges are not so bad. Just see if you
+can gather a couple of them, O'Day, when the next broken crate comes
+up."
+
+"Did you live down with the monkeys?" asked the other, made tepidly
+garrulous by the sunshine and the alleviating meal of juicy fruit. "I
+was down there, once myself. But only for a few hours. That was when
+I was with the Columbia Detective Agency. The monkey people did me
+up. I'd have my job yet if it hadn't been for them. I'll tell you
+about it.
+
+"One day the chief sent a note around to the office that read: 'Send
+O'Day here at once for a big piece of business.' I was the crack
+detective of the agency at that time. They always handed me the big
+jobs. The address the chief wrote from was down in the Wall Street
+district.
+
+"When I got there I found him in a private office with a lot of
+directors who were looking pretty fuzzy. They stated the case. The
+president of the Republic Insurance Company had skipped with about
+a tenth of a million dollars in cash. The directors wanted him back
+pretty bad, but they wanted the money worse. They said they needed
+it. They had traced the old gent's movements to where he boarded a
+tramp fruit steamer bound for South America that same morning with
+his daughter and a big gripsack--all the family he had.
+
+"One of the directors had his steam yacht coaled and with steam up,
+ready for the trip; and he turned her over to me, cart blongsh. In
+four hours I was on board of her, and hot on the trail of the fruit
+tub. I had a pretty good idea where old Wahrfield--that was his name,
+J. Churchill Wahrfield--would head for. At that time we had a treaty
+with about every foreign country except Belgium and that banana
+republic, Anchuria. There wasn't a photo of old Wahrfield to be
+had in New York--he had been foxy there--but I had his description.
+And besides, the lady with him would be a dead-give-away anywhere.
+She was one of the high-flyers in Society--not the kind that have
+their pictures in the Sunday papers--but the real sort that open
+chrysanthemum shows and christen battleships.
+
+"Well, sir, we never got a sight of that fruit tub on the road. The
+ocean is a pretty big place; and I guess we took different paths
+across it. But we kept going toward this Anchuria, where the fruiter
+was bound for.
+
+"We struck the monkey coast one afternoon about four. There was a
+ratty-looking steamer off shore taking on bananas. The monkeys were
+loading her up with big barges. It might be the one the old man had
+taken, and it might not. I went ashore to look around. The scenery
+was pretty good. I never saw any finer on the New York stage. I
+struck an American on shore, a big, cool chap, standing around with
+the monkeys. He showed me the consul's office. The consul was a
+nice young fellow. He said the fruiter was the _Karlsefin_, running
+generally to New Orleans, but took her last cargo to New York. Then
+I was sure my people were on board, although everybody told me that
+no passengers had landed. I didn't think they would land until after
+dark, for they might have been shy about it on account of seeing that
+yacht of mine hanging around. So, all I had to do was to wait and nab
+'em when they came ashore. I couldn't arrest old Wahrfield without
+extradition papers, but my play was to get the cash. They generally
+give up if you strike 'em when they're tired and rattled and short on
+nerve.
+
+"After dark I sat under a cocoanut tree on the beach for a while,
+and then I walked around and investigated that town some, and it was
+enough to give you the lions. If a man could stay in New York and
+be honest, he'd better do it than to hit that monkey town with a
+million.
+
+"Dinky little mud houses; grass over your shoe tops in the streets;
+ladies in low-neck-and-short-sleeves walking around smoking cigars;
+tree frogs rattling like a hose cart going to a ten blow; big
+mountains dropping gravel in the back yards, and the sea licking the
+paint off in front--no, sir--a man had better be in God's country
+living on free lunch than there.
+
+"The main street ran along the beach, and I walked down it, and
+then turned up a kind of lane where the houses were made of poles
+and straw. I wanted to see what the monkeys did when they weren't
+climbing cocoanut trees. The very first shack I looked in I saw
+my people. They must have come ashore while I was promenading. A
+man about fifty, smooth face, heavy eyebrows, dressed in black
+broadcloth, looking like he was just about to say, 'Can any little
+boy in the Sunday school answer that?' He was freezing on to a grip
+that weighed like a dozen gold bricks, and a swell girl--a regular
+peach, with a Fifth Avenue cut--was sitting on a wooden chair. An old
+black woman was fixing some coffee and beans on a table. The light
+they had come from a lantern hung on a nail. I went and stood in the
+door, and they looked at me, and I said:
+
+"'Mr. Wahrfield, you are my prisoner. I hope, for the lady's sake,
+you will take the matter sensibly. You know why I want you.'
+
+"'Who are you?' says the old gent.
+
+"'O'Day,' says I, 'of the Columbia Detective Agency. And now, sir,
+let me give you a piece of good advice. You go back and take your
+medicine like a man. Hand 'em back the boodle; and maybe they'll let
+you off light. Go back easy, and I'll put in a word for you. I'll
+give you five minutes to decide.' I pulled out my watch and waited.
+
+"Then the young lady chipped in. She was one of the genuine
+high-steppers. You could tell by the way her clothes fit and the
+style she had that Fifth Avenue was made for her.
+
+"'Come inside,' she says. 'Don't stand in the door and disturb the
+whole street with that suit of clothes. Now, what is it you want?'
+
+"'Three minutes gone,' I said. 'I'll tell you again while the other
+two tick off.
+
+"'You'll admit being the president of the Republic, won't you?'
+
+"'I am,' says he.
+
+"'Well, then,' says I, 'it ought to be plain to you. Wanted, in New
+York, J. Churchill Wahrfield, president of the Republic Insurance
+Company.
+
+"'Also the funds belonging to said company, now in that grip, in the
+unlawful possession of said J. Churchill Wahrfield.'
+
+"'Oh-h-h-h!' says the young lady, as if she was thinking, 'you want
+to take us back to New York?'
+
+"'To take Mr. Wahrfield. There's no charge against you, miss.
+There'll be no objection, of course, to your returning with your
+father.'
+
+"Of a sudden the girl gave a tiny scream and grabbed the old boy
+around the neck. 'Oh, father, father!' she says, kind of contralto,
+'can this be true? Have you taken money that is not yours? Speak,
+father!' It made you shiver to hear the tremolo stop she put on her
+voice.
+
+"The old boy looked pretty bughouse when she first grappled him, but
+she went on, whispering in his ear and patting his off shoulder till
+he stood still, but sweating a little.
+
+"She got him to one side and they talked together a minute, and then
+he put on some gold eyeglasses and walked up and handed me the grip.
+
+"'Mr. Detective,' he says, talking a little broken, 'I conclude
+to return with you. I have finished to discover that life on this
+desolate and displeased coast would be worse than to die, itself. I
+will go back and hurl myself upon the mercy of the Republic Company.
+Have you brought a sheep?'
+
+"'Sheep!' says I; 'I haven't a single--'
+
+"'Ship,' cut in the young lady. 'Don't get funny. Father is of German
+birth, and doesn't speak perfect English. How did you come?'
+
+"The girl was all broke up. She had a handkerchief to her face, and
+kept saying every little bit, 'Oh, father, father!' She walked up to
+me and laid her lily-white hand on the clothes that had pained her at
+first. I smelt a million violets. She was a lulu. I told her I came
+in a private yacht.
+
+"'Mr. O'Day,' she says. 'Oh, take us away from this horrid country at
+once. Can you! Will you! Say you will.'
+
+"'I'll try,' I said, concealing the fact that I was dying to get them
+on salt water before they could change their mind.
+
+"One thing they both kicked against was going through the town to the
+boat landing. Said they dreaded publicity, and now that they were
+going to return, they had a hope that the thing might yet be kept out
+of the papers. They swore they wouldn't go unless I got them out to
+the yacht without any one knowing it, so I agreed to humour them.
+
+"The sailors who rowed me ashore were playing billiards in a bar-room
+near the water, waiting for orders, and I proposed to have them take
+the boat down the beach half a mile or so, and take us up there. How
+to get them word was the question, for I couldn't leave the grip with
+the prisoner, and I couldn't take it with me, not knowing but what
+the monkeys might stick me up.
+
+"The young lady says the old coloured woman would take them a note. I
+sat down and wrote it, and gave it to the dame with plain directions
+what to do, and she grins like a baboon and shakes her head.
+
+"Then Mr. Wahrfield handed her a string of foreign dialect, and she
+nods her head and says, 'See, senor,' maybe fifty times, and lights
+out with the note.
+
+"'Old Augusta only understands German,' said Miss Wahrfield, smiling
+at me. 'We stopped in her house to ask where we could find lodging,
+and she insisted upon our having coffee. She tells us she was raised
+in a German family in San Domingo.'
+
+"'Very likely,' I said. 'But you can search me for German words,
+except _nix verstay_ and _noch einst_. I would have called that "See,
+senor" French, though, on a gamble.'
+
+"Well, we three made a sneak around the edge of town so as not to
+be seen. We got tangled in vines and ferns and the banana bushes
+and tropical scenery a good deal. The monkey suburbs was as wild as
+places in Central Park. We came out on the beach a good half mile
+below. A brown chap was lying asleep under a cocoanut tree, with
+a ten-foot musket beside him. Mr. Wahrfield takes up the gun and
+pitches it into the sea. 'The coast is guarded,' he says. 'Rebellion
+and plots ripen like fruit.' He pointed to the sleeping man, who
+never stirred. 'Thus,' he says, 'they perform trusts. Children!'
+
+"I saw our boat coming, and I struck a match and lit a piece of
+newspaper to show them where we were. In thirty minutes we were on
+board the yacht.
+
+"The first thing, Mr. Wahrfield and his daughter and I took the grip
+into the owner's cabin, opened it up, and took an inventory. There
+was one hundred and five thousand dollars, United States treasury
+notes, in it, besides a lot of diamond jewelry and a couple of
+hundred Havana cigars. I gave the old man the cigars and a receipt
+for the rest of the lot, as agent for the company, and locked the
+stuff up in my private quarters.
+
+"I never had a pleasanter trip than that one. After we got to
+sea the young lady turned out to be the jolliest ever. The very
+first time we sat down to dinner, and the steward filled her glass
+with champagne--that director's yacht was a regular floating
+Waldorf-Astoria--she winks at me and says, 'What's the use to borrow
+trouble, Mr. Fly Cop? Here's hoping you may live to eat the hen that
+scratches on your grave.' There was a piano on board, and she sat
+down to it and sung better than you give up two cases to hear plenty
+times. She knew about nine operas clear through. She was sure enough
+_bon ton_ and swell. She wasn't one of the 'among others present'
+kind; she belonged on the special mention list!
+
+"The old man, too, perked up amazingly on the way. He passed the
+cigars, and says to me once, quite chipper, out of a cloud of smoke,
+'Mr. O'Day, somehow I think the Republic Company will not give me the
+much trouble. Guard well the gripvalise of the money, Mr. O'Day, for
+that it must be returned to them that it belongs when we finish to
+arrive.'
+
+"When we landed in New York I 'phoned to the chief to meet us in that
+director's office. We got in a cab and went there. I carried the
+grip, and we walked in, and I was pleased to see that the chief had
+got together that same old crowd of moneybugs with pink faces and
+white vests to see us march in. I set the grip on the table. 'There's
+the money,' I said.
+
+"'And your prisoner?' said the chief.
+
+"I pointed to Mr. Wahrfield, and he stepped forward and says:
+
+"'The honour of a word with you, sir, to explain.'
+
+"He and the chief went into another room and stayed ten minutes. When
+they came back the chief looked as black as a ton of coal.
+
+"'Did this gentleman,' he says to me, 'have this valise in his
+possession when you first saw him?'
+
+"'He did,' said I.
+
+"The chief took up the grip and handed it to the prisoner with a
+bow, and says to the director crowd: 'Do any of you recognize this
+gentleman?'
+
+"They all shook their pink faces.
+
+"'Allow me to present,' he goes on, Senor Miraflores, president of
+the republic of Anchuria. The senor has generously consented to
+overlook this outrageous blunder, on condition that we undertake
+to secure him against the annoyance of public comment. It is a
+concession on his part to overlook an insult for which he might claim
+international redress. I think we can gratefully promise him secrecy
+in the matter.'
+
+"They gave him a pink nod all round.
+
+"'O'Day,' he says to me. 'As a private detective you're wasted.
+In a war, where kidnapping governments is in the rules, you'd be
+invaluable. Come down to the office at eleven.'
+
+"I knew what that meant.
+
+"'So that's the president of the monkeys,' says I. 'Well, why
+couldn't he have said so?'
+
+"Wouldn't it jar you?"
+
+
+
+
+XVIII
+
+THE VITAGRAPHOSCOPE
+
+
+Vaudeville is intrinsically episodic and discontinuous. Its audiences
+do not demand denouements. Sufficient unto each "turn" is the evil
+thereof. No one cares how many romances the singing comedienne may
+have had if she can capably sustain the limelight and a high note or
+two. The audiences reck not if the performing dogs get to the pound
+the moment they have jumped through their last hoop. They do not
+desire bulletins about the possible injuries received by the comic
+bicyclist who retires head-first from the stage in a crash of
+(property) china-ware. Neither do they consider that their seat
+coupons entitle them to be instructed whether or no there is a
+sentiment between the lady solo banjoist and the Irish monologist.
+
+Therefore let us have no lifting of the curtain upon a tableau of the
+united lovers, backgrounded by defeated villainy and derogated by the
+comic, osculating maid and butler, thrown in as a sop to the Cerberi
+of the fifty-cent seats.
+
+But our programme ends with a brief "turn" or two; and then to the
+exits. Whoever sits the show out may find, if he will, the slender
+thread that binds together, though ever so slightly, the story that,
+perhaps, only the Walrus will understand.
+
+
+_Extracts from a letter from the first vice-president of the Republic
+Insurance Company, of New York City, to Frank Goodwin, of Coralio,
+Republic of Anchuria._
+
+
+ My Dear Mr. Goodwin:--Your communication per Messrs.
+ Howland and Fourchet, of New Orleans, has reached us. Also
+ their draft on N. Y. for $100,000, the amount abstracted
+ from the funds of this company by the late J. Churchill
+ Wahrfield, its former president. . . . The officers
+ and directors unite in requesting me to express to you
+ their sincere esteem and thanks for your prompt and much
+ appreciated return of the entire missing sum within two
+ weeks from the time of its disappearance. . . . Can assure
+ you that the matter will not be allowed to receive the
+ least publicity. . . . Regret exceedingly the distressing
+ death of Mr. Wahrfield by his own hand, but . . .
+ Congratulations on your marriage to Miss Wahrfield . . .
+ many charms, winning manners, noble and womanly nature and
+ envied position in the best metropolitan society. . . .
+
+ Cordially yours,
+
+ LUCIUS E. APPLEGATE,
+ First Vice-President the Republic Insurance Company.
+
+
+
+The Vitagraphoscope
+(Moving Pictures)
+
+The Last Sausage
+
+SCENE--_An Artist's Studio._ The artist, a young man of prepossessing
+appearance, sits in a dejected attitude, amid a litter of sketches,
+with his head resting upon his hand. An oil stove stands on a pine
+box in the centre of the studio. The artist rises, tightens his waist
+belt to another hole, and lights the stove. He goes to a tin bread
+box, half-hidden by a screen, takes out a solitary link of sausage,
+turns the box upside-down to show that there is no more, and chucks
+the sausage into a frying-pan, which he sets upon the stove. The
+flame of the stove goes out, showing that there is no more oil. The
+artist, in evident despair, seizes the sausage, in a sudden access of
+rage, and hurls it violently from him. At the same time a door opens,
+and a man who enters receives the sausage forcibly against his nose.
+He seems to cry out; and is observed to make a dance step or two,
+vigorously. The newcomer is a ruddy-faced, active, keen-looking
+man, apparently of Irish ancestry. Next he is observed to laugh
+immoderately; he kicks over the stove; he claps the artist (who is
+vainly striving to grasp his hand) vehemently upon the back. Then
+he goes through a pantomime which to the sufficiently intelligent
+spectator reveals that he has acquired large sums of money by trading
+pot-metal hatchets and razors to the Indians of the Cordillera
+Mountains for gold dust. He draws a roll of money as large as a small
+loaf of bread from his pocket, and waves it above his head, while at
+the same time he makes pantomime of drinking from a glass. The artist
+hurriedly secures his hat, and the two leave the studio together.
+
+
+The Writing on the Sands
+
+SCENE--_The Beach at Nice._ A woman, beautiful, still young,
+exquisitely clothed, complacent, poised, reclines near the water,
+idly scrawling letters in the sand with the staff of her silken
+parasol. The beauty of her face is audacious; her languid pose is one
+that you feel to be impermanent--you wait, expectant, for her to
+spring or glide or crawl, like a panther that has unaccountably
+become stock-still. She idly scrawls in the sand; and the word that
+she always writes is "Isabel." A man sits a few yards away. You can
+see that they are companions, even if no longer comrades. His face is
+dark and smooth, and almost inscrutable--but not quite. The two speak
+little together. The man also scratches on the sand with his cane.
+And the word that he writes is "Anchuria." And then he looks out
+where the Mediterranean and the sky intermingle, with death in his
+gaze.
+
+
+The Wilderness and Thou
+
+SCENE--_The Borders of a Gentleman's Estate in a Tropical Land._ An
+old Indian, with a mahogany-coloured face, is trimming the grass on a
+grave by a mangrove swamp. Presently he rises to his feet and walks
+slowly toward a grove that is shaded by the gathering, brief
+twilight. In the edge of the grove stand a man who is stalwart, with
+a kind and courteous air, and a woman of a serene and clear-cut
+loveliness. When the old Indian comes up to them the man drops money
+in his hand. The grave-tender, with the stolid pride of his race,
+takes it as his due, and goes his way. The two in the edge of the
+grove turn back along the dim pathway, and walk close, close--for,
+after all, what is the world at its best but a little round field of
+the moving pictures with two walking together in it?
+
+CURTAIN
+
+
+
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+
+
+CABBAGES AND KINGS
+
+by O Henry
+
+
+
+
+Contents
+
+The Proem
+"Fox-in-the-Morning"
+The Lotus and the Bottle
+Smith
+Caught
+Cupid's Exile Number Two
+The Phonograph and the Graft
+Money Maze
+The Admiral
+The Flag Paramount
+The Shamrock and the Palm
+The Remnants of the Code
+Shoes
+Ships
+Masters of Arts
+Dicky
+Rouge et Noir
+Two Recalls
+The Vitagraphoscope
+
+
+
+
+CABBAGES AND KINGS
+
+
+The Proem
+
+By the Carpenter
+
+They will tell you in Anchuria, that President Miraflores, of that
+volatile republic, died by his own hand in the coast town of Coralio;
+that he had reached thus far in flight from the inconveniences of
+an imminent revolution; and that one hundred thousand dollars,
+government funds, which he carried with him in an American leather
+valise as a souvenir of his tempestuous administration, was never
+afterward recovered.
+
+For a ~real~, a boy will show you his grave. It is back of the town
+near a little bridge that spans a mangrove swamp. A plain slab of
+wood stands at its head. Some one has burned upon the headstone with
+a hot iron this inscription:
+
+ RAMON ANGEL DE LAS CRUZES
+ Y MIRAFLORES
+ PRESIDENTE DE LA REPUBLICA
+ DE ANCHURIA
+ QUE SEA SU JUEZ DIOS
+
+It is characteristic of this buoyant people that they pursue no man
+beyond the grave. "Let God be his judge!"--Even with the hundred
+thousand unfound, though they greatly coveted, the hue and cry went
+no further than that.
+
+To the stranger or the guest the people of Coralio will relate the
+story of the tragic end of their former president; how he strove
+to escape from the country with the publice funds and also with Dona
+Isabel Guilbert, the young American opera singer; and how, being
+apprehended by members of the opposing political party in Coralio,
+he shot himself through the head rather than give up the funds, and,
+in consequence, the Senorita Guilbert. They will relate further
+that Dona Isabel, her adventurous bark of fortune shoaled by the
+simultaneous loss of her distinguished admirer and the souvenir
+hundred thousand, dropped anchor on this stagnant coast, awaiting
+a rising tide.
+
+They say, in Coralio, that she found a prompt and prosperous tide
+in the form of Frank Goodwin, an American resident of the town,
+an investor who had grown wealthy by dealing in the products of
+the country--a banana king, a rubber prince, a sarsaparilla, indigo
+and mahogany baron. The Senorita Guilbert, you will be told, married
+Senor Goodwin one month after the president's death, thus, in the
+very moment when Fortune had ceased to smile, wresting from her
+a gift greater than the prize withdrawn.
+
+Of the American, Don Frank Goodwin, and of his wife the natives have
+nothing but good to say. Don Frank has lived among them for years,
+and has compelled their respect. His lady is easily queen of what
+social life the sober coast affords. The wife of the governor of the
+district, herself, who was of the proud Castilian family of Monteleon
+y Dolorosa de los Santos y Mendez, feels honored to unfold her napkin
+with olive-hued, ringed hands at the table of Senora Goodwin. Were
+you to refer (with your northern prejudices) to the vivacious past
+of Mrs. Goodwin when her audacious and gleeful abandon in light opera
+captured the mature president's fancy, or to her share in that
+statesman's downfall and malfeasance, the Latin shrug of the shoulder
+would be your only answer and rebuttal. What prejudices there were
+in Coralio concerning Senora Goodwin seemed now to be in her favor,
+whatever they had been in the past.
+
+It would seem that the story is ended, instead of begun; that the
+close of tragedy and the climax of a romance have covered the ground
+of interest; but, to the more curious reader it shall be some slight
+instruction to trace the close threads that underlie the ingenious
+web of circumstances.
+
+The headpiece bearing the name of President Miraflores is daily
+scrubbed with soap-bark and sand. An old half-breed Indian tends the
+grave with fidelity and the dawdling minuteness of inherited sloth.
+He chops down the weeds and ever-springing grass with his machete, he
+plucks ants and scorpions and beetles from it with his horny fingers,
+and sprinkles its turf with water from the plaza fountain. There is
+no grave anywhere so well kept and ordered.
+
+Only by following out the underlying threads will it be made clear
+why the old Indian, Galves, is secretly paid to keep green the grave
+of President Miraflores by one who never saw that unfortunate
+statesman in life or in death, and why that one was wont to walk
+in the twilight, casting from a distance looks of gentle sadness upon
+that unhonored mound.
+
+Elsewhere than at Coralio one learns of the impetuous career
+of Isabel Guilbert. New Orleans gave her birth and the mingled
+French and Spanish creole nature that tinctured her life with such
+turbulence and warmth. She had little education, but a knowledge of
+men and motives that seemed to have come by instinct. Far beyond the
+common woman was she endowed with intrepid rashness, with a love for
+the pursuit of adventure to the brink of danger, and with desire for
+the pleasures of life. Her spirit was one to chafe under any curb;
+she was Eve after the fall, but before the bitterness of it was felt.
+She wore life as a rose in her bosom.
+
+Of the legion of men who had been at her feet it was said that
+but one was so fortunate as to engage her fancy. To President
+Miraflores, the brilliant but unstable ruler of Anchuria, she yielded
+the key to her resolute heart. How, then, do we find her (as the
+Coralians would have told you) the wife of Frank Goodwin, and happily
+living a life of dull and dreamy inaction?
+
+The underlying threads reach far, stretching across the sea.
+Following them out it will be made plain why "Shorty" O'Day, of the
+Columbia Detective Agency, resigned his position. And, for a lighter
+pastime, it shall be a duty and a pleasing sport to wander with Momus
+beneath the tropic stars where Melpomene once stalked austere. Now
+to cause laughter to echo from those lavish jungles and frowing crags
+where formerly rang the cries of pirate's victims; to lay aside pike
+and cutlass and attack with quip and jollity; to draw one saving
+titter of mirth from the rusty casque of Romance--this were pleasant
+to do in the shade of the lemon-trees on that coast that is curved
+like lips set for smiling.
+
+For there are yet tales of the Spanish Main. That segment of
+continent washed by the tempestuous Caribbean, and presenting to the
+sea a formidable border of tropicle jungle topped by the overweening
+Cordilleras, is still begirt by mystery and romance. In past times,
+buccaneers and revolutionists roused the echoes of its cliffs, and
+the condor wheeled perpetually above where, in the green groves,
+they made food for him with their matchlocks and toledos. Taken and
+retaken by sea rovers, by adverse powers and by sudden uprising of
+rebellious factions, the historic 300 miles of adventurous coast has
+scarcely known for hundreds of years whom rightly to call its master.
+Pizarro, Balboa, Sir Francis Drake, and Bolivar did what they could
+to make it a part of Christendom. Sir John Morgan, Lafitte and other
+eminent swashbucklers bombarded and pounded it in the name of
+Abaddon.
+
+The game still goes on. The guns of the rovers are silenced; but the
+tintype man, the enlarged photograph brigand, the kodaking tourist
+and the scouts of the gentle brigade of fakirs have found it out, and
+carry on the work. The hucksters of Germany, France, and Sicily now
+bag in small change across their counters. Gentlemen adventurers
+throng the waiting-rooms of its rulers with proposals for railways
+and concessions. The little ~opera-bouffe~ nations play at
+government and intrigue until some day a big, silent gunboat glides
+into the offing and warns them not to break their toys. And with
+these changes comes also the small adventurer, with empty pockets to
+fill, light of heart, busy-brained--the modern fairy prince, bearing
+an alarm clock with which, more surely than by the sentimental
+kiss, to awaken the beautiful tropics from their centuries' sleep.
+Generally he wears a shamrock, which he matches pridefully against
+the extravagant palms; and it is he who had driven Melpomene to
+the wings, and set Comedy to dancing before the footlights of the
+Southern Cross.
+
+So, there is a little tale to tell of many things. Perhaps to the
+promiscuous ear of the Walrus it shall come with most avail; for in
+it there are indeed shoes and ships and sealing-wax and cabbage-palms
+and presidents instead of kings.
+
+Add to these a little love and counterplotting, and scatter
+everywhere throughout the maze a trail of tropical dollars--dollars
+warmed no more by the torrid sun than by the hot palms of the scouts
+of Fortune--and, after all, here seems to be Life, itself, with talk
+enough to weary the most garrulous of Walruses.
+
+
+
+I
+
+"Fox-in-the-Morning"
+
+Coralio reclined, in the mid-day heat, like some vacuous beauty
+lounging in a guarded harem. The town lay at the sea's edge on
+a strip of alluvial coast. It was set like a little pearl in an
+emerald band. Behind it, and seeming almost to topple, imminent,
+above it, rose the sea-following range of the Cordilleras. In front
+the sea was spread, a smiling jailer, but even more incorruptible
+than the frowning mountains. The waves swished along the smooth
+beach; the parrots screamed in the orange and ceiba-trees; the palms
+waved their limber fronds foolishly like an awkward chorus at the
+prima donna's cue to enter.
+
+Suddenly the town was full of excitement. A native boy dashed down
+a grass-grown street, shrieking: "~Busca el Senor~ Goodwin. ~Ha
+venido un telegrafo por el!~"
+
+The word passed quickly. Telegrams do not come to any one in
+Coralio. The cry for Senor Goodwin was taken up by a dozen officious
+voices. The main street running parallel to the beach became
+populated with those who desired to expedite the delivery of the
+dispatch. Knots of women with complexions varying from palest olive
+to deepest brown gathered at street corners and plaintively carolled:
+"~Un telegrafo por Senor~ Goodwin!" The ~comandante~, Don Senor
+el Coronel Encarnacion Rios, who was loyal to the Ins and suspected
+Goodwin's devotion to the Outs, hissed: "Aha!" and wrote in his
+secret memorandum book the accusive fact that Senor Goodwin had on
+that momentous date received a telegram.
+
+In the midst of the hullabaloo a man stepped to the door of a small
+wooden building and looked out. Above the door was a sign that read
+"Keogh and Clancy"--a nomenclature that seemed not to be indigenous
+to that tropical soil. The man in the door was Billy Keogh, scout
+of fortune and progress and latter-day rover of the Spanish Main.
+Tintypes and photographs were the weapons with which Keogh and Clancy
+were at that time assailing the hopeless shores. Outside the shop
+were set two large frames filled with specimens fo their art and
+skill.
+
+Keogh leaned in the doorway, his bold and humorous countenance
+wearing a look of interest at the unusual influx of life and sound
+in the street. When the meaning of the disturbance became clear
+to him he placed a hand beside his mouth and shouted: "Hey! Frank!"
+in such a robustious voice that the feeble clamor of the natives was
+drowned and silenced.
+
+Fifty yards away, on the seaward side of the street, stood the
+abode of the consul for the United States. Out from the door of
+this building tumbled Goodwin at the call. He had been smoking
+with Willard Geddie, the consul, on the back porch of the consulate,
+which was conceded to be the coolest spot in Coralio.
+
+"Hurry up," shouted Keogh. "There's a riot in town on account of
+a telegram that's come for you. You want to be careful about these
+things, my boy. It won't do to trifle with the feelings of the public
+this way. You'll be getting a pink note some day with violet scent
+on it; and then the country'll be steeped in the throes of a
+revolution."
+
+Goodwin had strolled up the street and met the boy with the message.
+The ox-eyed women gazed at him with shy admiration, for his type
+drew them. He was big, blond, and jauntily dressed in white linen,
+with buckskin ~zapatos~. His manner was courtly, with a merciful
+eye. When the telegram had been delivered, and the bearer of it
+dismissed with a gratuity, the relieved populace returned to the
+contiguities of shade from which curiosity had drawn it--the women
+to their baking in the mud ovens under the orange-trees, or to the
+interminable combing of their long, straight hair; the men to their
+cigarettes and gossip in the cantinas.
+
+Goodwin sat on Keogh's doorstep, and read his telegram. It was from
+Bob Englehart, an American, who lived in San Mateo, the capital city
+of Anchuria, eighty miles in the interior. Englehart was a gold
+miner, an ardent revolutionist and "good people." That he was a man
+of resource and imagination was proven by the telegram he had sent.
+It had had been his task to send a confidential message to his friend
+in Coralio. This could not have been accomplished in either Spanish
+or English, for the eye politic in Anchuria was an active one. But
+Englehart was a diplomatist. There existed but one code upon which
+he might make requisition with promise of safety--the great and
+potent code of Slang. So, here is the message that slipped,
+unconstrued, through the fingers of curious officials, and came
+to the eye of Goodwin:
+
+ "His Nibs skedaddled yesterday per jack-rabbit line with all the
+ coin in the kitty and the bundle of muslin he's spoony about. The
+ boodle is six figures short. Our crowd in good shape, but we need
+ the spondulicks. You collar it. The main guy and the dry goods
+ are headed for the briny. You to know what to do.
+
+ BOB."
+
+This screed, remarkable as it was, had no mystery for Goodwin.
+He was the most successful of the small advance-guard of speculative
+Americans that had invaded Anchuria, and he had not reached that
+enviable pinnacle without having well exercised the arts of foresight
+and deduction. He had taken up political intrigue as a matter of
+business. He was acute enough to wield a certain influence among
+the leading schemers, and he was prosperous enough to be able to
+purchase the respect of the petty-officeholders. There was always
+a revolutionary party; and to it he had allied himself; for the
+adherents of a new administration received the rewards of their
+labors. There was now a Liberal party seeking to overturn President
+Miraflores. If the wheel successfully revolved, Goodwin stood to win
+a concession to 30,000 manzanas of the finest coffee lands in the
+interior. Certain incidents in the recent career of President
+Miraflores had excited a shrewd suspicion in Goodwin's mind that the
+government was near a dissolution from another cause than that of a
+revolution, and now Englehart's telegram had come as a corroboration
+of his wisdom.
+
+The telegram, which had remained unintelligible to the Anchurian
+linguists who had applied to it in vain their knowledge of Spanish
+and elemental English, conveyed a stimulating piece of news to
+Goodwin's understanding. It informed him that the president of the
+republic had decamped from the capital city with the contents of the
+treasury. Furthermore, that he was accompanied in his flight by that
+winning adventuress Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer, whose troupe
+of performers had been entertained by the president at San Mateo
+during the past month on a scale less modest than that with which
+royal visitors are often content. The reference to the "jackrabbit
+line" could mean nothing else than the mule-back system of transport
+that prevailed between Coralio and the capital. The hint that the
+"boodle" was "six figures short" made the condition of the national
+treasury lamentably clear. Also it was convincingly true that the
+ingoing party--its way now made a pacific one--would need the
+"spondulicks." Unless its pledges should be fulfilled, and the
+spoils held for the delectation of the victors, precarious indeed,
+would be the position of the new government. Therefore it was
+exceeding necessary to "collar the main guy," and recapture the
+sinews of war and government.
+
+Goodwin handed the message to Keogh.
+
+"Read that, Billy," he said. "It's from Bob Englehart. Can you
+manage the cipher?"
+
+Keogh sat in the other half of the doorway, and carefully perused
+the telegram.
+
+"'Tis not a cipher," he said, finally. "'Tis what they call
+literature, and that's a system of language put in the mouths
+of people that they've never been introduced to by writers of
+imagination. The magazines invented it, but I never knew before that
+President Norvin Green had stamped it with the seal of his approval.
+'Tis now no longer literature, but language. The dictionaries tried,
+but they couldn't make it go for anything but dialect. Sure, now
+that the Western Union indorses it, it won't be long till a race of
+people will spring up that speaks it."
+
+"You're running too much to philology, Billy," said Goodwin. "Do you
+make out the meaning of it?"
+
+"Sure," replied the philosopher of Fortune. "All languages come easy
+to the man who must know 'em. I've even failed to misunderstand an
+order to evacuate in classical Chinese when it was backed up by the
+muzzle of a breech-loader. This little literary essay I hold in my
+hands means a game of Fox-in-the-Morning. Ever play that, Frank,
+when you was a kid?"
+
+"I think so," said Goodwin, laughing. "You join hands all 'round,
+and--"
+
+"You do not," interrupted Keogh. "You've got a fine sporting game
+mixed up in your head with 'All Around the Rosebush.' The spirit of
+'Fox-in-the-Morning' is opposed to the holding of hands. I'll tell
+you how it's played. This president man and his companion in play,
+they stand up over in San Mateo, ready for the run, and shout:
+"Fox-in-the-Morning!' Me and you, standing here, we say: 'Goose
+and Gander!' They say: 'How many miles is it to London town?' We
+say: 'Only a few, if your legs are long enough. How many comes out?'
+They say: 'More than you're able to catch.' And then the game
+commences."
+
+"I catch the idea," said Goodwin. "It won't do to let the goose
+and gander slip through your fingers, Billy; their feathers are too
+valuable. Our crowd is prepared and able to step into the shoes
+of the government at once; but with the treasury empty we'd stay
+in power about as long as a tenderfoot would stick on an untamed
+bronco. We must play the fox on every foot of the coast to prevent
+their getting out of the country."
+
+"By the mule-back schedule," said Keogh, "it's five days down from
+San Mateo. We've got plenty of time to set our outposts. There's
+only three places on the coast where they can hope to sail from--here
+and Solitas and Alazan. They're the only points we'll have to guard.
+It's as easy as a chess problem--fox to play, and mate in three
+moves. Oh, goosey, goosey, gander, whither do you wander? By the
+blessing of the literary telegraph the boodle of this benighted
+fatherland shall be preserved to the honest political party that
+is seeking to overthrow it."
+
+The situation had been justly outlined by Keogh. The down trail
+from the capital was at all times a weary road to travel. A jiggety-
+joggety journey it was; ice-cold and hot, wet and dry. The trail
+climbed appalling mountains, wound like a rotten string about the
+brows of breathless precipices, plunged through chilling snow-fed
+streams, and wriggled like a snake through sunless forests teeming
+with menacing insect and animal life. After descending to the
+foothills it turned to a trident, the central prong ending at Alazan.
+Another branched off to Coralio; the third penetrated to Solitas.
+Between the sea and the foothills stretched the five miles breadth
+of alluvial coast. Here was the flora ofthe tropics in its rankest
+and most prodigal growth. Spaces here and there had been wrested
+from the jungle and planted with bananas and cane and orange groves.
+The rest was a riot of wild vegetation, the home of monkeys, tapirs,
+jaguars, alligators, and prodigious reptiles and insects. Where no
+road was cut a serpent could scarcely make its way through the tangle
+of vines and creepers. Across the treacherous mangrove swamps few
+things without wings could safely pass. Therefore the fugitives
+could hope to reach the coast only by one of the routes named.
+
+"Keep the matter quiet, Billy," advised Goodwin. "We don't want
+the Ins to know that the president is in flight. I suppose Bob's
+information is something of a scoop in the capital as yet. Otherwise
+he would not have tried to make his message a confidential one; and,
+besides, everybody would have heard the news. I'm going around now
+to see Dr. Zavalla, and start a man up the trail to cut the telegraph
+wire."
+
+As Goodwin rose, Keogh threw his hat upon the grass by the door and
+expelled a tremendous sigh.
+
+"What's the trouble, Billy?" asked Goodwin, pausing. "That's the
+first time I heard you sigh."
+
+"'Tis the last," said Keogh. "With that sorrowful puff of wind
+I resign myself to a life of praiseworthy but harassing honesty.
+What are tintypes, if you please, to the opportunities of the great
+and hilarious class of ganders and geese? Not that I would be a
+president, Frank--and the boodle he's got is too big for me to handle
+--but in some ways I feel my conscience hurting me for addicting
+myself to photographing a nation instead of running away with it.
+Frank, did you ever see the 'bundle of muslin' that His Excellency
+has wrapped up and carried off?"
+
+"Isabel Guilbert?" said Goodwin, laughing. "No, I never did. From
+what I've heard of her, though, I imagine that she wouldn't stick at
+anything to carry her point. Don't get romantic, Billy. Sometimes
+I begin to fear that there's Irish blood in your ancestry."
+
+"I never saw her either," went on Keogh; "but they say she's got all
+the ladies of mythology, sculpture, and fiction reduced to chromos.
+They say she can look at a man once, and he'll turn monkey and climb
+trees to pick coconuts for her. Think of that president man with
+Lord know how many hundreds of thousands of dollars in one hand,
+and this muslin siren in the other, galloping down the hill on a
+sympathetic mule amid songbirds and flowers! And here is Billy
+Keogh, because he is virtuous, condemned to the unprofitable swindle
+of slandering the faces of missing links on tin for an honest living!
+'Tis an injustice of nature."
+
+"Cheer up," said Goodwin. "You are a pretty poor fox to be envying
+a gander. Maybe the enchanting Guilbert will take a fancy to you and
+your tintypes after we impoverish her royal escort."
+
+"She could do worse," reflected Keogh; "but she won't. 'Tis not
+a tintype gallery, but a gallery of the gods that she's fitted to
+adorn. She's a very wicked lady, and the president man is in luck.
+But I hear Clancy swearing in the back room for having to do all the
+work." And Keogh plunged for the rear of the "gallery," whistling
+gaily in a spontaneous way that belied his recent sigh over the
+questionable good luck of the flying president.
+
+Goodwin turned from the main street into a much narrower one that
+intersected it at a right angle.
+
+These side streets were covered by a growth of thick, rank grass,
+which was kept to a navigable shortness by the machetes of the
+police. Stone sidewalks, little more than a ledge in width, ran
+along the base of the mean and monotonous adobe houses. At the
+outskirts of the village these streets dwindled to nothing; and here
+were set the palm-thatched huts of the Caribs and the poorer natives,
+and the shabby cabins of negroes from Jamaica and the West India
+islands. A few structures raised their heads above the red-tiled
+roofs of the one-story houses--the bell tower of the ~Calaboza~,
+the Hotel de los Extranjeros, the residence of the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company's agent, the store and residence of Bernard Brannigan,
+a ruined cathedral in which Columbus had once set foot, and, most
+imposing of all, the Casa Morena--the summer "White House" of
+the President of Anchuria. On the principal street running along
+the beach--the Broadway of Coralio--were the larger stores, the
+government ~bodega~ and post-office, the ~cuartel~, the rum-shops
+and the market place.
+
+On his way Goodwin passed the house of Bernard Brannigan. It was a
+modern wooden building, two stories in height. The ground floor was
+occupied by Brannigan's store, the upper one contained the living
+apartments. A wide cool porch ran around the house half way up its
+outer walls. A handsome, vivacious girl neatly dressed in flowing
+white leaned over the railing and smiled down upon Goodwin. She was
+no darker than many an Andalusian of high descent; and she sparkled
+and glowed like a tropical moonlight.
+
+"Good evening, Miss Paula," said Goodwin, taking off his hat, with
+his ready smile. There was little difference in his manner whether
+he addressed women or men. Everybody in Coralio liked to receive
+the salutation of the big American.
+
+"Is there any news, Mr. Goodwin? Please don't say no. Isn't it
+warm? I feel just like Mariana in her moated grange--or was it a
+range?--it's hot enough."
+
+"No, there's no news to tell, I believe," said Goodwin, with a
+mischievous look in his eye, "except that old Geddie is getting
+grumpier and crosser every day. If something doesn't happen to
+relieve his mind I'll have to quit smoking on his back porch--and
+there's no other place available that is cool enough."
+
+"He isn't grumpy," said Paula Brannigan, impulsively, "when he--"
+
+But she ceased suddenly, and drew back with a deepening color;
+for her mother had been a ~mestizo~ lady, and the Spanish blood
+had brought to Paula a certain shyness that was an adornment to
+the other half of her demonstrative nature.
+
+
+
+II
+
+The Lotus And The Bottle
+
+Willard Greddie, consul for the United States in Coralio, was working
+leisurely on his yearly report. Goodwin, who had strolled in as he
+did daily for a smoke on the much coveted porch, had found him so
+absorbed in his work that he departed after roundly abusing the
+consul for his lack of hospitality.
+
+"I shall complain to the civil service department," said Goodwin;--
+"or is it a department?--perhaps it's only a theory. One gets neither
+civility nor service from you. You won't talk; and you won't set out
+anything to drink. What kind of a way is that of representing your
+government?"
+
+Goodwin strolled out and across to the hotel to see if he could bully
+the quarantine doctor into a game on Coralio's solitary billiard
+table. His plans were completed for the interception of the
+fugitives from the capital; and now it was but a waiting game that
+he had to play.
+
+The consul was interested in his report. He was only twenty-four;
+and he had not been in Coralio long enough for his enthusiasm to cool
+in the heat of the tropics--a paradox that may be allowed between
+Cancer and Capricorn.
+
+So many thousand bunches of bananas, so mnay thousand oranges and
+coconuts, so many ounces of gold dust, pounds of rubber, coffee,
+indigo and sarparilla--actually, exports were twenty per cent greater
+than for the previous year!
+
+A little thrill of satisfaction ran through the consul. Perhaps,
+he thought, the State Department, upon reading his introduction,
+would notice--and then he leaned back in his chair and laughed.
+He was getting as bad as the others. For the moment he had forgotten
+that Coralio was an insignificant republic lying along the by-ways
+of a second-rate sea. He thought of Gregg, the quarantine doctor,
+who subscribed for the London ~Lancet~, expecting to find it quoting
+his reports to the home Board of Health concerning the yellow fever
+germ. The consul knew that not one in fifty of his acquaintances in
+the States had ever heard of Coralio. He knew that two men, at any
+rate, would have to read his report--some underling in the State
+Department and a compositor in the Public Printing Office. Perhaps
+the typesticker would note the increase of commerce in Coralio, and
+speak of it, over the cheese and beer, to a friend.
+
+He had just written: "Most unaccountable is the supineness of the
+large exporters in the United States in permitting the French and
+German houses to practically control the trade interests of this
+rich and productive country"--when he heard the hoarse notes of
+a steamer's siren.
+
+Geddie laid down his pen and gathered his Panama hat and umbrella.
+By the sound he knew it to be the ~Valhalla~, one of the line of
+fruit vessels plying for the Vesuvius Company. Down to ~ninos~ of
+five years, every one in Coralio could name you each incoming steamer
+by the note of her siren.
+
+The consul sauntered by a roundabout, shaded way to the beach.
+By reason of long practice he gauged his stroll so accurately that
+by the time he arrived on the sandy shore the boat of the customs
+officials was rowing back from the steamer, which had been boarded
+and inspected according to the laws of Anchuria.
+
+There is no harbor at Coralio. Vessels of the draught of the
+~Valhalla~ must ride at anchor a mile from shore. When they take on
+fruit it is conveyed on lighters and freighter sloops. At Solitas,
+where there was a fine harbor, ships of many kinds were to be seen,
+but in the roadstead off Coralio scarcely any save the fruiters
+paused. Now and then a tramp coaster, or a mysterious brig from
+Spain, and then a tramp coaster, or a mysterious brig from Spain,
+or a saucy French barque would hang innocently for a few days in
+the offing. Then the custom-house crew would become doubly vigilant
+and wary. At night a sloop or two would be making strange trips in
+and out along the shore; and in the morning the stock of Three-Star
+Hennessey, wines and drygoods in Coralio would be found vastly
+increased. It has also been said that the customs officials jingled
+more silver in the pockets of their red-striped trousers, and that
+the record books showed no increase in import duties received.
+
+The custom's boat and the ~Valhalla~ gig reached the shore at the
+same time. When they grounded in the shallow water there was still
+five yards of rolling surf between them and dry sand. Then half-
+clothed Caribs dashed into the water, and brought in on their backs
+the ~Valhalla's~ purser, and the little native officials in their
+cotton undershirts, blue trousers with red stripes, and flapping
+straw hats.
+
+At college Geddie had been a treasure as a first-baseman. He now
+closed his umbrella, stuck it upright in the sand, and stooped,
+with his hands resting upon his knees. The purser, burlesquing
+the pitcher's contortions, hurled at the consul the heavy roll of
+newspapers, tied with a string, that the steamer always brought for
+him. Geddie leaped high and caught the roll with a sounding "thwack."
+The loungers on the beach--about a third of the population of the
+town--laughed and applauded delightedly. Every week they expected
+to see that roll of papers delivered and received in that same
+manner, and they were never disappointed. Innovations did not
+flourish in Coralio.
+
+The consul re-hoisted his umbrella and walked back to the consulate.
+
+This home of a great nation's representative was a wooden structure
+of two rooms, with a native-built gallery of poles, bamboo and
+nipa palm running on three sides of it. One room was the official
+apartment, furnished chastely with a flat-top desk, a hammock, and
+three uncomfortable cane-seated chairs. Engravings of the first and
+latest president of the country represented hung against the wall.
+The other room was the consul's living apartment.
+
+It was eleven o'clock when he returned from the beach, and therefore
+breakfast time. Chanca, the Carib woman who cooked for him, was just
+serving the meal on the side of the gallery facing the sea--a spot
+famous as the coolest in Coralio. The breakfast consisted of shark's
+fin soup, stew of land crabs, breadfruit, a boiled iguana steak,
+aquacates, a freshly cut pineapple, claret and coffee.
+
+Geddie took his seat, and unrolled with luxurious laziness his bundle
+of newspapers. Here in Coralio for two days or longer he would read
+the goings-on in the world very much as we of the world read those
+whimsical contributions to inexact science that assume to portray the
+doings of the Martians. After he had finished with the papers they
+would be sent on the rounds of the other English-speaking residents
+of the town.
+
+The paper that came first to his hand was one of those bulky
+mattresses of printed stuff upon which the readers of certain
+New York journals are supposed to take their Sabbath literary nap.
+Opening this the consul rested it upon the table, supporting its
+weight with the aid of the back of a chair. Then he partook of his
+meal deliberately, turning the leaves from time to time and glancing
+half idly at the contents.
+
+Presently he was struck by something familiar to him in a picture--
+a half-page, badly printed reproduction of a photograph of a vessel.
+Languidly interested, he leaned for a nearer scrutiny and a view of
+the florid headlines of the column next to the picture.
+
+Yes; he was not mistaken. The engraving was of the eight-hundred-ton
+yacht ~Idalia~, belonging to "that prince of good fellows, Midas of
+the money market, and society's pink of perfection, J. Ward Tolliver."
+
+Slowly sipping his black coffee, Geddie read the column of print.
+Following a listed statement of Mr. Tolliver's real estate and bonds,
+came a description of the yacht's furnishings, and then the grain of
+news no bigger than a mustard seed. Mr. Tolliver, with a party of
+favored guests, would sail the next day on a six weeks' cruise along
+the Central American and South American coasts and among the Bahama
+Islands. Among the guests were Mrs. Cumberland Payne and Miss Ida
+Payne, of Norfolk.
+
+The writer, with the fatuous presumption that was demanded of him
+by his readers, had concocted a romance suited to their palates.
+He bracketed the names of Miss Payne and Mr. Tolliver until he had
+well-nigh read the marriage ceremony over them. He played coyly and
+insinuatingly upon the strings of "~on dit~" and "Madame Rumor" and
+"a little bird" and "no one would be surprised," and ended with
+congratulations.
+
+Geddie, having finished his breakfast, took his papers to the edge
+of the gallery, and sat there in his favorite steamer chair with his
+feet on the bamboo railing. He lighted a cigar, and looked out upon
+the sea. He felt a glow of satisfaction at finding he was so little
+disturbed by what he had read. He told himself that he had conquered
+the distress that had sent him, a voluntary exile, to this far land
+of the lotus. He could never forget Ida, of course; but there was
+no longer any pain in thinking about her. When they had had that
+misunderstanding and quarrel he had impulsively sought this
+consulship, with the desire to retaliate upon her by detaching
+himself from her world and presence. He had succeeded thoroughly
+in that. During the twelve months of his life in Coralio no word had
+passed between them, though he had sometimes heard of her through the
+dilatory correspondence with the few friends to whom he still wrote.
+Still he could not repress a little thrill of satisfaction at knowing
+that she had not yet married Tolliver or any one else. But evidently
+Tolliver had not yet abandoned hope.
+
+Well, it made no difference to him now. He had eaten of the lotus.
+He was happy and content in this land of perpetual afternoon. Those
+old days of life in the States seemed like an irritating dream. He
+hoped Ida would be as happy as he was. The climate as balmy as that
+of distant Avalon; the fetterless, idyllic round of enchanted days;
+the life among this indolent, romantic people--a life full of music,
+flowers, and low laughter; the influence of the imminent sea and
+mountains, and the many shapes of love and magic and beauty that
+bloomed in the white tropic nights--with all he was more than
+content. Also, there was Paula Brannigan.
+
+Geddie intended to marry Paula--if, of course, she would consent;
+but he felt rather sure that she would do that. Somehow, he kept
+postponing his proposal. Several times he had been quite near to it;
+but a mysterious something always held him back. Perhaps it was only
+the unconscious, instinctive conviction that the act would sever the
+last tie that bound him to his old world.
+
+He could be very happy with Paula. Few of the native girls could be
+compared with her. She had attended a convent school in New Orleans
+for two years; and when she chose to display her accomplishments no
+one could detect any difference between her and the girls of Norfolk
+and Manhattan. But it was delicious to see her at home dressed, as
+she sometimes was, in the native costume, with bare shoulders and
+flowing sleeves.
+
+Bernard Brannigan was the great merchant of Coralio. Besides his
+store, he maintained a train of pack mules, and carried on a lively
+trade with the interior towns and villages. He had married a native
+lady of high Castilian descent, but with a tinge of Indian brown
+showing through her olive cheek. The union of the Irish and the
+Spanish had produced, as it so often has, an offshoot of rare beauty
+and variety. They were very excellent people indeed, and the upper
+story of the house was ready to be placed at the service of Geddie
+and Paula as soon as he should make up his mind to speak about it.
+
+By the time two hours were whiled away the consul tired of reading.
+The papers lay scattered about him on the gallery. Reclining there,
+he gazed dreamily out upon an Eden. A clump of banana plants
+interposed their broad shields between him and the sun. The gentle
+slope from the consulate to the sea was covered with the dark-green
+foliage of lemon-trees and orange-trees just bursting into bloom.
+A lagoon pierced the land like a dark, jagged crystal, and above it a
+pale ceiba-tree rose almost to the clouds. The waving coconut palms
+on the beach flared their decorative green leaves against the slate
+of an almost quiescent sea. His senses were cognizant of brilliant
+scarlet and ochres and the vert of the coppice, of odors of fruit and
+bloom and the smoke from Chanca's clay oven under the calabash-tree;
+of the treble laughter of the native women in their huts, the song of
+the robin, the salt taste of the breeze, the diminuendo of the faint
+surf running along the shore--and, gradually, of a white speck,
+growing to a blur, that intruded itself upon the drab prospect of
+the sea.
+
+Lazily interested, he watched this blur increase until it became
+the ~Idalia~ steaming at full speed, coming down the coast. Without
+changing his position he kept his eyes upon the beautiful white yacht
+as she drew swiftly near, and came opposite to Coralio. Then, sitting
+upright, he saw her float steadily past and on. He had seen the
+frequent splash of her polished brass work and the stripes of her
+deck-awnings--so much, and no more. Like a ship on a magic lantern
+slide the ~Idalia~ had crossed the illuminated circle of the consul's
+little world, and was gone. Save for the tiny cloud of smoke that
+was left hanging over the brim of the sea, she might have been an
+immaterial thing, a chimera of his idle brain.
+
+Geddie went into his office and sat down to dawdle over his report.
+If the reading of the article in the paper had left him unshaken,
+this silent passing of the ~Idalia~ had done for him still more.
+It had brought the calm and peace of a situation from which all
+uncertainty had been erased. He knew that men sometimes hope without
+being aware of it. Now, since she had come two thousand miles and
+had passed without a sign, not even his unconscious self need cling
+to the past any longer.
+
+After dinner, when the sun was low behind the mountains, Geddie
+walked on the little strip of beach under the coconuts. The wind
+was blowing mildly landward, and the surface of the sea was rippled
+by tiny wavelets.
+
+A miniature breaker, spreading with a soft "swish" upon the sand
+brought with its something round and shiny that rolled back again
+as the wave receded. The next influx beached it clear, and Geddie
+picked it up. The thing was a long-necked wine bottle of colorless
+glass. The cork had been driven in tightly to the level of the
+mouth, and the end covered with dark-red sealing-wax. The bottle
+contained only what seemed to be a sheet of paper, much curled from
+the manipulation it had undergone while being inserted. In the
+sealing-wax was the impression of a seal--probably of a signet-ring,
+bearing the initials of a monogram; but the impression had been
+hastily made, and the letters were past anything more certain than
+a shrewd conjecture. Ida Payne had always worn a signet-ring in
+preference to any other finger decoration. Geddie thought he could
+make out the familiar "I P"; and a queer sensation of disquietude
+went over him. More personal and intimate was this reminder of
+her than had been the sight of the vessel she was doubtless on.
+He walked back to his house, and set the bottle on his desk.
+
+Throwing off his hat and coat, and lighting a lamp--for the night had
+crowded precipitately upon the brief twilight--he began to examine
+his piece of sea salvage.
+
+By holding the bottle near the light and turning it judiciously, he
+made out that it contained a double sheet of note-paper filled with
+close writing; further, that the paper was of the same size and shade
+as that always used by Ida; and that, to the best of his belief, the
+handwriting was hers. The imperfect glass of the bottle so distorted
+the rays of light that he could read no word of the writing; but
+certain capital letters, of which he caught comprehensive glimpses,
+were Ida's, he felt sure.
+
+There was a little smile both of perplexity and amusement in Geddie's
+eyes as he set the bottle down, and laid three cigars side by side
+on his desk. He fetched his steamer chair from the gallery, and
+stretched himself comfortably. He would smoke those three cigars
+while considering the problem.
+
+For it amounted to a problem. He almost wished that he had not found
+the bottle; but the bottle was there. Why should it have drifted in
+from the sea, whence come so many disquieting things, to disturb his
+peace?
+
+In this dreamy land, where time seemed so redundant, he had fallen
+into the habit of bestowing much thought upon even trifling matters.
+
+He bagan to speculate upon many fanciful theories concerning the
+story of the bottle, rejecting each in turn.
+
+Ships in danger of wreck or disablement sometimes cast forth such
+precarious messengers calling for aid. But he had seen the ~Idalia~
+not three hours before, safe and speeding. Suppose the crew had
+mutinied and imprisoned the passengers below, and the message was one
+begging for succor! But, premising such an improbable outrage, would
+the agitated captives have taken the pains to fill four pages of
+note-paper with carefully penned arguments to their rescue.
+
+Thus by elimination he soon rid the matter of the more unlikely
+theories, and was reduced--though aversely--to the less assailable
+ones that the bottle contained a message to himself. Ida knew he
+was in Coralio; she must have launched the bottle while the yacht
+was passing and the wind blowing fairly toward the shore.
+
+As soon as Geddie reached this conclusion a wrinkle came between his
+brows and a stubborn look settled around his mouth. He sat looking
+out through the doorway at the gigantic fire-flies traversing the
+quiet streets.
+
+If this was a message to him from Ida, what could it mean save an
+overture at reconciliation? And if that, why had she not used the
+same methods of the post instead of this uncertain and even flippant
+means of communication? A note in an empty bottle, cast into the
+sea! There was something light and frivolous about it, if not
+actually contemptuous.
+
+The thought stirred his pride, and subdued whatever emotions had been
+resurrected by the finding of the bottle.
+
+Geddie put on his coat and hat and walked out. He followed a street
+that led him along the border of the little plaza where a band was
+playing and people were rambling, care-free and indolent. Some
+timorous ~senoritas~ scurrying past with fire-flies tangled in the
+jetty braids of their hair glanced at him with shy, flattering eyes.
+The air was languorous with the scent of jasmin and orange-blossoms.
+
+The consul stayed his steps at the house of Bernard Brannigan. Paula
+was swinging in a hammock on the gallery. She rose from it like a
+bird from its nest. The color came to her cheeck at the sound of
+Geddie's voice.
+
+He was charmed at the sight of her costume--a flounced muslin dress,
+with a little jacket of white flannel, all made with neatness and
+style. He suggested a stroll, and they walked out to the old Indian
+well on the hill road. They sat on the curb, and there Geddie made
+the expected but long-deferred speech. Certain though he had been
+that she would not say him nay, he was still thrilled at the
+completeness and sweetness of her surrender. Here was surely a heart
+made for love and steadfastness. Here was no caprice or questionings
+or captious standards of convention.
+
+When Geddie kissed Paula at her door that night he was happier than
+he had ever been before. "Here in this hollow lotus land, ever
+to live and lie reclined" seemed to him, as it has seemed to many
+mariners, the best as well as the easiest. His future would be
+an ideal one. He had attained a Paradise without a serpent. His
+Eve would be indeed a part of him, unbeguiled, and therefore more
+beguiling. He had made his decision tonight, and his heart was full
+of serene, assured content.
+
+Geddie went back to his house whistling that finest and saddest love
+song, "La Golondrina." At the door his tame monkey leaped down from
+his shelf, chattering briskly. The consul turned to his desk to get
+him some nuts he usually kept there. Reaching in the half-darkness,
+his hand struck against the bottle. He started as if he had touched
+the cold rotundity of a serpent.
+
+He had forgotten that the bottle was there.
+
+He lighted the lamp and fed the monkey. Then, very deliberately,
+he lighted a cigar, and took the bottle in his hand, and walked down
+the path to the beach.
+
+There was a moon, and the sea was glorious. The breeze had shifted,
+as it did each evening, and was now rushing steadily seaward.
+
+Stepping to the water's edge, Geddie hurled the unopened bottle far
+out into the sea. It disappeared for a moment, and then shot upward
+twice its length. Geddie stood still, watching it. The moonlight
+was so bright that he could see it bobbing up and down with the
+little waves. Slowly it receded from the shore, flashing and turning
+as it went. The wind was carrying it out to sea. Soon it became a
+mere speck, doubtfully discerned at irregular intervals; and then the
+mystery of it was swallowed up by the greater mystery of the ocean.
+Geddie stood still upon the beach, smoking and looking out upon the
+water.
+
+
+"Simon!--Oh, Simon!--Wake up there, Simon!" bawled a sonorous voice
+at the edge of the water.
+
+Old Simon Cruz was a half-breed fisherman and smuggler who lived in a
+hut on the beach. Out of his earliest nap Simon was thus awakened.
+
+He slipped on his shoes and went outside. Just landing from one of
+the ~Valhalla's~ boats was the third mate of that vessel, who was an
+acquaintance of Simon's, and three sailors from the fruiter.
+
+"Go up, Simon," called the mate, "and find Doctor Gregg or Mr.
+Goodwin or anybody that's a friend to Mr. Geddie, and bring 'em here
+at once."
+
+"Saints of the skies!" said Simon, sleepily, "nothing has happened
+to Mr. Geddie?"
+
+"He's under that tarpauling," said the mate, pointing to the boat,
+"and he's rather more than half drowned. We seen him from the
+steamer nearly a mile out from shore, swimmin' like mad after a
+bottle that was floatin' in the water, outward bound. We lowered the
+gig and started for him. He nearly had his hand on the bottle, when
+he gave out and went under. We pulled him out in time to save him,
+maybe; but the doctor is the one to decide that."
+
+"A bottle?" said the old man, rubbing his eyes. He was not yet fully
+awake. "Where is the bottle?"
+
+"Driftin' along out there some'eres," said the mate, jerking his
+thumb toward the sea. "Get on with you, Simon."
+
+
+
+III
+
+Smith
+
+Goodwin and the ardent patriot, Zavalla, took all the precautions
+that their foresight could contrive to prevent the escape of
+President Miraflores and his companion. The sent trusted messengers
+up the coast to Solitas and Alazan to warn the local leaders of
+the flight, and to instruct them to patrol the water line and arrest
+the fugitives at all hazards should they reveal themselves in that
+territory. After this was done there remained only to cover
+the district about Coralio and await the coming of the quarry.
+The nets were well spread. The roads were so few, the opportunities
+for embarkation so limited, and the two or three probable points of
+exit so well guarded that it would be strange indeed if there should
+slip through the meshes so much of the country's dignity, romance,
+and collateral. The president would, without doubt, move as secretly
+as possible, and endeavor to board a vessel by stealth from some
+secluded point along the shore.
+
+On the fourth day after the receipt of Englehart's telegram the
+~Karlsefin~, a Norwegian steamer chartered by the New Orleans fruit
+trade, anchored off Coralio with three horse toots of her siren.
+The ~Karlesfin~ ws not one of the line operated by the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company. She was something of a dilettante, doing odd jobs for a
+company that was scarcely important enough to figure as a rival to
+the Vesuvius. The movements of the ~Karlesfin~ were dependent upon
+the state of the market. Sometimes she would ply steadily between
+the Spanish Main and New Orleans in the regular transport of fruit;
+next she would be maing erratic trips to Mobile or Charleston, or
+even as far north as New York, according to the distribution of
+the fruit supply.
+
+Goodwin lounged upon the beach with the susual crowd of idlers that
+had gathered to view the steamer. Now that President Miraflores
+might be expected to reach the borders of his abjured country at any
+time, the orders were to keep a strict and unrelenting watch. Every
+vessel that approached the shores might now be considered a possible
+means of escape for the fugitives; and an eye was kept even on
+the slopes and dories that belonged to the sea-going contingent
+of Coralio. Goodwin and Zavalla moved everywhere, but without
+ostentation, watching the loopholes of escape.
+
+The customs official crowded importantly into their boat and rowed
+out to the ~Karlesfin~. A boat from the steamer landed her purser
+with his papers, and took out the quarantine doctor with his green
+umbrella and clinical thermometer. Next a swarm of Caribs began
+to load upon lighters the thousands of bunches of bananas heaped
+upon the shore and row them out to the steamer. The ~Karlesfin~
+had no passenger list, and was soon done with the attention of
+the authorities. The purser declared that the steamer would remain
+at anchor until morning, taking on her fruit during the night.
+The ~Karlesfin~ had come, he said, from New York, to which port her
+latest load of oranges and coconuts had been conveyed. Two or three
+of the freighter sloops were engaged to assist in the work, for
+the captain was anxious to make a quick return in order to reap
+the advantage offered by a certain dearth of fruit in the States.
+
+About four o'clock in the afternoon another of those marine monsters,
+not very familiar in those waters, hove in sight, following the
+fateful ~Idalia~--a graceful steam yacht, painted a light buff,
+clean-cut as a steel engraving. The beautiful vessel hovered off
+shore, see-sawing the waves as lightly as a duck in a rain barrel.
+A swift boat manned by a crew in uniform came ashore, and a stocky-
+built man leaped to the sands.
+
+The newcomer seemed to turn a disapproving eye upon the rather motley
+congregation of native Anchurians, and made his way at once toward
+Goodwin, who was the most conspicuously Anglo-Saxon figure present.
+Goodwin greeted him with courtesy.
+
+Conversation developed that the newly landed one was named Smith,
+and that he had come in a yacht. A meagre biography, truly; for
+the yacht was most apparent; and the "Smith" not beyond a reasonable
+guess before the revelation. Yet to the eye of Goodwin, who has
+seen several things, there was a discrepancy between Smith and his
+yacht. A bullet-headed man Smith was, with an oblique, dead eye
+and the moustache of a cocktail-mixer. And unless he had shifted
+costumes before putting off for shore he had affronted the deck of
+his correct vessel clad in a pearl-gray derby, a gay plaid suit and
+vaudeville neckwear. Men owning pleasure yachts generally harmonize
+better with them.
+
+Smith looked business, but he was no advertiser. He commented upon
+the scenery, remarking upon its fidelity to the pictures in the
+geography; and then inquired for the United States consul. Goodwin
+pointed out the starred-and-striped bunting hanging from above the
+little consulate, which was concealed behind the orange-trees.
+
+"Mr. Geddie, the consul, will be sure to be there," said Goodwin.
+"He was very nearly drowned a few days ago while taking a swim in the
+sea, and the doctor has ordered him to remain indoors for some time."
+
+Smith ploughed his way through the sand to the consulate, his
+haberdashery creating violent discord against the smooth tropical
+blues and greens.
+
+Geddie was lounging in his hammock, somewhat pale of face and languid
+in pose. On that night when the ~Valhalla's~ boat had brought him
+ashore apparently drenched to death by the sea, Doctor Gregg and his
+other friends had toiled for hours to preserve the little spark of
+life that remained to him. The bottle, with its impotent message,
+was gone out to sea, and the problem that it had provoked was reduced
+to a simple sum in addition--one and one make two, by the rule of
+arithmetic; one by the rule of romance.
+
+There is a quaint old theory that man may have two souls--a
+peripheral one which serves ordinarily, and a central one which
+is stirred only at certain times, but then with activity and vigor.
+While under the domination of the former a man will shave, vote, pay
+taxes, give money to his family, buy subscription books and comport
+himself on the average plan. But let the central soul suddenly
+become dominant, and he may, in the twinkling of an eye, turn upon
+the partner of his joys with furious execration; he may change his
+politics while you could snap your fingers; he may deal out deadly
+insult to his dearest friend; he may get him, instanter, to a
+monastery or a dance hall; he may elope, or hang himself--or he may
+write a song or poem, or kiss his wife unasked, or give his funds
+to the search of a microbe. Then the peripheral soul will return;
+and we have our safe, sane citizen again. It is but the revolt of
+the Ego against Order; and its effect is to shake up the atoms only
+that they may settle where they belong.
+
+Geddie's revulsion had been a mild one--no more than a swim in
+a summer sea after so inglorious an object as a drifting bottle.
+And now he was himself again. Upon his desk, ready for the post,
+was a letter to his government tendering his resignation as consul,
+to be effective as soon as another could be appointed in his place.
+For Bernard Brannigan, who never did things in a half-way manner,
+was to take Geddie at once for a partner in his very profitable
+and various enterprises; and Paula was happily engaged in plans for
+refurnishing and decorating the upper story of the Brannigan house.
+
+The consul rose from his hammock when he saw the conspicuous stranger
+at this door.
+
+"Keep your seat, old man," said the visitor, with an airy wave of his
+large hand. "My name's Smith; and I've come in a yacht. You are the
+consul--is that right? A big, cool guy on the beach directed me here.
+Thought I'd pay my respects to the flag."
+
+"Sit down, said Geddie. "I've been admiring your craft ever since it
+came in sight. Looks like a fast sailer. What's her tonnage?"
+
+"Search me!" said Smith. "I don't know what she weighs in at. But
+she's got a tidy gait. The ~Rambler~--that's her name--don't take
+the dust of anything afloat. This is my first trip on her. I'm
+taking a squint along this coast just to get an idea of the countries
+where the rubber and red pepper and revolutions come from. I had no
+idea there was so much scenery down here. Why, Central Park ain't
+in it with this neck of the woods. I'm from New York. They get
+monkeys, and coconuts, and parrots down here--is that right?"
+
+"We have them all," said Geddie. "I'm quite sure that our fauna and
+flora would take a prize over Central Park."
+
+"Maybe they would," admitted Smith, cheerfully. "I haven't seen them
+yet. But I guess you've got us skinned on the animal and vegetation
+question. You don't have much travel here, do you?"
+
+"Travel?" queried the consul. "I suppose you mean passengers on
+steamers. No; very few people land in Coralio. An investor now and
+then--tourists and sightseers generally go further down the coast to
+one of the larger towns where there is a harbor."
+
+"I see a ship out there loading up with bananas," said Smith. "Any
+passengers come on her?"
+
+"That's the ~Karlesfin~," said the consul. "She's a tramp fruiter--
+made her last trip to New York, I believe. No; she brought no
+passengers. I saw her boat come ashore, and there was no one. About
+the only exciting recreation we have here is watching steamers when
+they arrive; and a passenger on one of them generally causes the
+whole town to turn out. If you are going to remain in Coralio
+a while, Mr. Smith, I'll be glad to take you around to meet some
+people. There are four or five American chaps that are good to know,
+besides the native high-fliers."
+
+"Thanks," said the yachtsman, "but I wouldn't put you the trouble.
+I'd like to meet the guys you speak of, but I won't be here long
+enough to do much knocking around. That cool gent on the beach spoke
+of a doctor; can you tell me where to find him? The ~Rambler~ ain't
+quite as steady on her feet as a Broadway hotel; and a fellow gets
+a touch of seasickness now and then. Thought I'd strike the croaker
+for a handful of the little sugar pills, in case I need 'em."
+
+"You will be apt to find Doctor Gregg at the hotel," said the consul.
+"You can see it from the door--it's that two-story building with the
+balcony, where the orange-trees are."
+
+The Hotel de los Extranjeros was a dreary hostelry, in great disuse
+both by strangers and friends. It stood at a corner of the Street
+of the Holy Sepulchre. A grove of small orange-trees crowded against
+one side of it, enclosed by a low, rock wall over which a tall man
+might easily step. The house was of plastered adobe, stained a
+hundred shades of color by the salt breeze and the sun. Upon its
+upper balcony opened a central door and two windows containing broad
+jalousies instead of sashes.
+
+The lower floor communicated by two doorways with the narrow,
+rock-paved sidewalk. The ~pulperia~--or drinking shop--of the
+proprietess, Madama Timotea Ortiz, occupied the ground floor. On
+the bottles of brandy, ~anisada~, Scotch "smoke," and inexpensive
+wines behind the little counter the dust lay thick save where the
+fingers of infrequent customers had left irregular prints. The upper
+story contained four or five guest-rooms which were rarely put to
+their destined use. Sometimes a fruitgrower, riding in from his
+plantation to confer with his agent, would pass a melancholy night
+in the dismal upper story; sometimes a minor native official on some
+trifling government quest would have his pomp and majesty awed by
+Madama's sepulchral hospitality. But Madama sat behind her bar
+content, not desiring to quarrel with Fate. If any one required
+meat, drink or lodging at the Hotel de los Extranjeros they had but
+to come, and be served. ~Esta bueno~. If they came not, why, then,
+they came not. ~Esta bueno~.
+
+As the exceptional yachtsman was making his way down the precarious
+sidewalk of the Street of the Holy Sepulchre, the solitary permanent
+guest of that decaying hotel sat at its door, enjoying the breeze
+from the sea.
+
+Doctor Gregg, the quarantine physician, was a man of fifty or sixty,
+with a florid face and the longest beard between Topeka and Terra
+del Fuego. He held his position by virtue of an appointment by
+the Board of Health of a seaport city in one of the Southern states.
+That city feared the ancient enemy of every Southern seaport--the
+yellow fever--and it was the duty of Doctor Gregg to examine crew and
+passengers of every vessel leaving Coralio for preliminary symptoms.
+The duties were light, and the salary, for one who lived in Coralio,
+ample. Surplus time there was in plenty; and the good doctor added
+to his gains by a large private practice among the residents of the
+coast. The fact that he did not know ten words of Spanish was no
+obstacle; a pulse could be felt and a fee collected without one being
+a linguist. Add to the description the facts that the doctor had
+a story to tell concerning the operation of trepanning which no
+listener had ever allowed him to conclude, and that he believed
+in brandy as a prophylactic; and the special points of interest
+possessed by Doctor Gregg will have become exhausted.
+
+The doctor had dragged a chair to the sidewalk. He was coatless,
+and he leaned back against the wall and smoked, while he stroked his
+beard. Surprise came into his pale blue eyes when he caught sight
+of Smith in his unusual and prismatic clothes.
+
+"You're Doctor Gregg--is that right?" said Smith, feeling the dog's
+head pin in his tie. "The constable--I mean the consul, told me
+you hung out at this caravansary. My name's Smith; and I came in a
+yacht. Taking a cruise around, looking at the monkeys and pineapple-
+trees. Come inside and have a drink, Doc. This cafe looks on the
+blink, but I guess it can set out something wet."
+
+"I will join you, sir, in just a taste of brandy," said Doctor Gregg,
+rising quickly. "I find that as a prophylactic a little brandy is
+almost a necessity in this climate."
+
+As they turned to enter the ~pulperia~ a native man, barefoot,
+glided noiselessly up and addressed the doctor in Spanish. He was
+yellowish-brown, like an over-ripe lemon; he wore a cotton shirt and
+ragged linen trousers girded by a leather belt. His face was like
+an animal's, live and wary, but without promise of much intelligence.
+This man jabbered with animation and so much seriousness that it
+seemed a pity that his words were to be wasted.
+
+Doctor Gregg felt his pulse.
+
+"You sick?" he inquired.
+
+"~Mi mujer es enferma en la casa,~" said the man, thus endeavoring
+to convey the news, in the only language open to him, that his wife
+lay ill in her palm-thatched hut.
+
+The doctor drew a handful of capsules filled with a white powder from
+his trousers pocket. He counted out ten of them into the native's
+hand, and held up his forefinger impressively.
+
+"Take one," said the doctor, "every two hours." He then held up two
+fingers, shaking them emphatically before the native's face. Next he
+pulled out his watch and ran his finger round the dial twice. Again
+the two fingers confronted the patient's nose. "Two--two--two
+hours," repeated the doctor.
+
+"~Si, Senor,~" said the native, sadly.
+
+He pulled a cheap silver watch from his own pocket and laid it in
+the doctor's hand. "Me bring," said he, struggling painfully with
+his scant English, "other watchy tomorrow," then he departed
+downheartedly with his capsules.
+
+"A very ignorant race of people, sir," said the doctor, as he slipped
+the watch into his pocket. "He seems to have mistaken my directions
+for taking the physic for the fee. However, it is all right. He owes
+me an account, anyway. The chances are that he won't bring the other
+watch. You can't depend on anything they promise you. About that
+drink, now? How did you come to Coralio, Mr. Smith? I was not aware
+that any boats except the ~Karlesfin~ had arrived for some days."
+
+The two leaned against the deserted bar; and Madama set out a bottle
+without waiting for the doctor's order. There was no dust on it.
+
+After they had drank twice Smith said:
+
+"You say there were no passengers on the ~Karlesfin~, Doc? Are you
+sure about that? It seems to me I heard somebody down on the beach
+say that there was one or two aboard."
+
+"They were mistaken, sir. I myself went out and put all hands
+through a medical examination, as usual. The ~Karlesfin~ sails
+as soon as she gets her bananas loaded, which will be about daylight
+in the morning, and she got everything ready this afternoon. No,
+sir, there was no passenger list. Like that Three-Star? A French
+schooner landed two slooploads of it a month ago. If any customs
+duties on it went to the distinguished republic of Anchuria you may
+have my hat. If you won't have another, come out and let's sit
+in the cool a while. It isn't often we exiles get a chance to talk
+with somebody from the outside world."
+
+The doctor brought out another chair to the sidewalk for his new
+acquaintance. The two seated themselves.
+
+"You are a man of the world," said Doctor Gregg; "a man of travel
+and experience. Your decision in a matter of ethics and, no doubt,
+on the points of equity, ability and professional probity should be
+of value. I would be glad if you will listen to the history of a
+case that I think stands unique in medical annals.
+
+"About nine years ago, while I was engaged in the practice of
+medicine in my native city, I was called to treat a case of contusion
+of the skull. I made the diagnosis that a splinter of bone was
+pressing upon the brain, and that the surgical operation known as
+trepanning was required. However, as the patient was a gentleman
+of wealth and position, I called in for consultation Doctor--"
+
+Smith rose from his chair, and laid a hand, soft with apology,
+upon the doctor's shirt sleeve.
+
+"Say, Doc," he said, solemnly, "I want to hear that story. You've
+got me interrested; and I don't want to miss the rest of it. I know
+it's a loola by the way it begins; and I want to tell it at the next
+meeting of the Barney O'Flynn Association, if you don't mind.
+But I've got one or two matters to attend to first. If I get 'em
+attended to in time I'll come right back and hear you spiel the rest
+before bedtime--is that right?"
+
+"By all means," said the doctor, "get your business attended to,
+and then return. I shall wait up for you. You see, one of the most
+prominent physicians at the consultation diagnosed the trouble as
+a blood clot; another said it was an abscess, but I--"
+
+"Don't tell me now, Doc. Don't spoil the story. Wait till I come
+back. I want to hear it as it runs off the reel--is that right?"
+
+The mountains reached up their bulky shoulders to receive the level
+gallop of Apollo's homing steeds, the day died in the lagoons and
+in the shadowed banana groves and in the mangrove swamps, where the
+great blue crabs were beginning to crawl to land for their nightly
+ramble. And it died, at last, upon the highest peaks. Then the
+brief twilight, ephemeral as the flight of a moth, came and went;
+the Southern Cross peeped with its topmost eye above a row of palms,
+and the fire-flies heralded with their torches and approach of
+soft-footed night.
+
+In the offing the ~Karlesfin~ swayed at anchor, her lights seeming
+to penetrate the water to countless fathoms with their shimmering,
+lanceolate reflections. The Caribs were busy loading her by means
+of the great lighters heaped full from the piles of fruit ranged upon
+the shore.
+
+On the sandy beach, with his back against a coconut-tree and the stubs
+of many cigars lying around him, Smith sat waiting, never relaxing
+his sharp gaze in the direction of the steamer.
+
+The incongruous yachtsman had concentrated his interest upon the
+innocent fruiter. Twice had he been assured that no passengers had
+come to Coralio on board of her. And yet, with a persistence not to
+be attributed to an idling voyager, he had appealed the case to the
+higher court of his own eyesight. Surprisingly like some gay-coated
+lizard, he crouched at the foot of the coconut palm, and with the
+beady, shifting eyes of the selfsame reptile, sustained his espionage
+on the ~Karlesfin~.
+
+On the white sands a whiter gig belonging to the yacht was drawn up,
+guarded by one of the white-ducked crew. Not far away in a ~pulperia~
+on the shore-following Calle Grande three other sailors swaggerred
+with their cues around Coralio's solitary billiard-table. The boat
+lay there as if under orders to be ready for use at any moment.
+There was in the atmosphere a hint of expectation, of waiting for
+something to occur, which was foreign to the air of Coralio.
+
+Like some passing bird of brilliant plumage, Smith alights on this
+palmy shore but to preen his wings for an instant and then to fly
+away upon silent pinions. When morning dawned there was no Smith,
+no waiting gig, no yacht in the offing, Smith left no intimation of
+his mission there, no footprints to show where he had followed the
+trail of his mystery on the sands of Coralio that night. He came;
+he spake his strange jargon of the asphalt and the cafes; he sat
+under the coconut-tree, and vanished. The next morning Coralio,
+Smithless, ate its fried plantain and said: "The man of pictured
+clothing went himself away." With the ~siesta~ the incident passed,
+yawning, into history.
+
+So, for a time, must Smith pass behind the scenes of the play.
+He comes no more to Coralio, nor to Doctor Gregg, who sits in vain,
+wagging his redundant beard, waiting to enrich his derelict audience
+with his moving tale of trepanning and jealousy.
+
+But prosperously to the lucidity of these loose pages, Smith shall
+flutter among them again. In the nick of time he shall come to tell
+us why he strewed so many anxious cigar stumps around the coconut
+palm that night. This he must do; for, when he sailed away before
+the dawn in his yacht ~Rambler~, he carried with him the answer to
+a riddle so big and preposterous that few in Anchuria had ventured
+even to propound it.
+
+
+
+IV
+
+Caught
+
+The plans for the detention of the flying President Miraflores and
+his companion at the coast line seemed hardly likely to fail. Doctor
+Zavalla himself had gone to the port of Alazan to establish a guard
+at that point. At Solitas the Liberal patriot Varras could be
+depended upon to keep close watch. Goodwin held himself responsible
+for the district about Coralio.
+
+The news of the president's flight had been disclosed to no one in
+the coast towns save trusted members of the ambitious political party
+that was desirous of succeeding to power. The telegraph wire running
+from San Mateo to the coast had been cut far up on the mountain trail
+by an emissary of Zavalla's. Long before this could be repaired and
+word received along it from the capital the fugitives would have
+reached the coast and the question of escape or capture been solved.
+
+Goodwin had stationed armed sentinels at frequent intervals along
+the shore for a mile in each direction from Coralio. They were
+instructed to keep a vigilant lookout during the night to prevent
+Miraflores from attempting to embark stealthily by means of some boat
+or sloop found by chance at the water's edge. A dozen patrols walked
+the streets of Coralio unsuspected, ready to intercept the truant
+official should he show himself there.
+
+Goodwin was very well convinced that no precautions had been
+overlooked. He strolled about the streets that bore such high-
+sounding names and were but narrow, grass-covered lanes, lending his
+own aid to the vigil that had been intrusted to him by Bob Englehart.
+
+The town had begun the tepid round of its nightly diversions. A few
+leisurely dandies, cald in white duck, with flowing neckties, and
+swinging slim bamboo canes, threaded the grassy by-ways toward the
+houses of their favored senoritas. Those who wooed the art of music
+dragged tirelessly at whining concertinas, or fingered lugubrious
+guitars at doors and windows. An occasional soldier from the
+~cuartel~, with flapping straw hat, without coat or shoes, hurried
+by, balancing his long gun like a lance in one hand. From every
+density of the foliage the giant tree frogs sounded their loud and
+irritating clatter. Further out, the guttural cries of marauding
+baboons and the coughing of the alligators in the black estuaries
+fractured the vain silence of the wood.
+
+By ten o'clock the streets were deserted. The oil lamps that had
+burned, a sickly yellow, at random corners, had been extinguished
+by some economical civic agent. Coralio lay sleeping calmly between
+toppling mountains and encroaching sea like a stolen babe in the arms
+of its abductors. Somewhere over in that tropical darkness--perhaps
+already threading the profundities of the alluvial lowlands--the high
+adventurer and his mate were moving toward land's end. The game of
+Fox-in-the-Morning should be coming soon to its close.
+
+Goodwin, at his deliberate gait, passed the long, low ~cuartel~ where
+Coralio's contingent of Anchuria's military force slumbered, with its
+bare toes pointed heavenward. There was a law that no civilian might
+come so near the headquarters of that citadel of war after nine
+o'clock, but Goodwin was always forgetting the minor statutes.
+
+"~Quien vive,~" shrieked the sentinel, wrestling prodigiously with
+his lengthy musket.
+
+"~Americano,~" growled Goodwin, without turning his head, and passed
+on, unhalted.
+
+To the right he turned, and to the left up the street that ultimately
+reached the Plaza Nacional. When within the toss of a cigar stump
+from the intersecting Street of the Holy Sepulchre, he stopped
+suddenly in the pathway.
+
+He saw the form of a tall man, clothed in black and carrying a large
+valise, hurry down the cross-street in the direction of the beach.
+And Goodwin's second glance made him aware of a woman at the man's
+elbow on the farther side, who seemed to urge forward, if not even
+to assist, her companion in their swift but silent progress. They
+were no Coralians, those two.
+
+Goodwin followed at increased speed, but without any of the artful
+tactics that are so dear to the heart of the sleuth. The American
+was too broad to feel the instinct of the detective. He stood as
+an agent for the people of Anchuria, and but for political reasons
+he would have demanded then and there the money. It was the design
+of his party to secure the imperilled fund, to restore it to the
+treasury of the country, and to declare itself in power without
+bloodshed or resistance.
+
+The couple halted at the door of the Hotel de los Extranjeros,
+and the man struck upon the wood with the impatience of one unused
+to his entry being stayed. Madama was long in response, but after
+a time her light showed, the door was opened, and the guests housed.
+
+Goodwin stoodin the quiet street, lighting another cigar. In
+two minutes, a faint gleam began to show between the slats of the
+jalousies in the upper story of the hotel. "They have engaged rooms,"
+said Goodwin to himself. "So, then, their arrangements for sailing
+have yet to be made."
+
+At the moment there came along one Esteban Delgado, a barber,
+an enemy to existing government, a jovial plotter against stagnation
+in any form. This barber was one of Coralio's saddest dogs, often
+remaining out of doors as late as eleven, post meridian. He was
+a partisan Liberal; and he greeted Goodwin with flatulent importance
+as a brother in the cause. But he had something important to tell.
+
+"What think you, Don Frank!" he cried, in the universal tone of the
+conspirator. "I have tonight shaved ~la barba~--what you call the
+'weeskers' of the ~Presidente~ himself, of this countree! Consider!
+He sent for me to come. In the poor ~casita~ of an old woman he
+awaited me--in a verree leetle house in a dark place. ~Carramba!~
+--el Senor Presidente to make himself thus secret and obscured!
+I shave a man and not see his face? This gold piece he gave me, and
+said it was to be all quite still. I think, Don Frank, there is what
+you call a chip over the bug."
+
+"Have you ever seen President Miraflores before?" asked Goodwin.
+
+"But once," answered Esteban. "He is tall; and he had weeskers,
+verree black and sufficient."
+
+"Was any one else present when you shaved him?"
+
+"An old Indian woman, Senor, that belonged with the ~casa~, and one
+senorita--a ladee of so much beautee!--~ah, Dios!~"
+
+"All right, Esteban," said Goodwin. "It's very lucky that you
+happened along with your tonsorial information. The new
+administration will be likely to remember you for this."
+
+Then in a few words he made the barber acquainted with the crisis
+into which the affairs of the nation had culminated, and instructed
+him to remain outside, keeping watch upon the two sides of the hotel
+that looked upon the street, and observing whether any one should
+attempt to leave the house by any door or window. Goodwin himself
+went to the door through which the guests had entered, opened it and
+stepped inside.
+
+Madama had returned downstairs from her journey above to see after
+the comfort of her lodgers. Her candle stood upon the bar. She was
+about to take a thimbleful of rum as a solace for having her rest
+disturbed. She looked up without surprise or alarm as her third
+caller entered.
+
+"Ah! it is the Senor Goodwin. Not often does he honor my poor house
+with his presence."
+
+"I must come oftener," said Goodwin, with a Goodwin smile. "I hear
+that your cognac is the best between Belize to the north and Rio to
+the south. Set out the bottle, Madama, and let us have the proof in
+~un vasito~ for each of us."
+
+"My ~aguardiente~," said Madama, with pride, "is the best. It grows,
+in beautiful bottles, in the dark places among the banana-trees.
+~Si, Senor~. Only at midnight can they be picked by sailor-men
+who bring them, before daylight comes, to your back door. Good
+~aguardiente~ is a verree difficult fruit to handle, Senor Goodwin."
+
+Smuggling, in Coralio, was much nearer than competition to being the
+life of trade. One spoke of it slyly, yet with a certain conceit,
+when it had been well accomplished.
+
+"You have guests in the house tonight," said Goodwin, laying a silver
+dollar upon the counter.
+
+"Why not?" said Madama, counting the change. "Two; but the smallest
+while finished to arrive. One senor, not quite old, and one senorita
+of sufficient hadsomeness. To their rooms they have ascended, not
+desiring the to-eat nor the to-drink. Two rooms--~Numero~9 and
+~Numero~ 10."
+
+"I was expecting that gentleman and that lady," said Goodwin. "I have
+important ~negocios~ that must be transacted. Will you allow me
+to see them?"
+
+"Why not?" sighed Madama, placidly. "Why should not Senor Goodwin
+ascend and speak to his friends? ~Esta bueno~. Romm ~Numero~ 9 and
+romm ~Numero~ 10."
+
+Goodwin loosened in his coat pocket the American revolver that he
+carried, and ascended the steep, dark stairway.
+
+In the hallway above, the saffron light from a hanging lamp allowed
+him to select the gaudy numbers on the doors. He turned the knob on
+Number 9, entered and closed the door behind him.
+
+If that was Isabel Guilbert seated by the table in that poorly
+furnished room, report had failed to do her charms justice. She
+rested her head upon one hand. Extreme fatigue was signified in
+every line of her figure; and upon her countenance a deep perplexity
+was written. Her eyes were gray-irised, and of that mold that seems
+to have belonged to the orbs of all the famous queens of hearts.
+Their whites were singularly clear and brilliant, concealed above
+the irises by heavy horizontal lids, and showing a snowy line between
+them. Such eyes denote great nobility, vigor, and, if you can
+conceive of it, a most generous selfishness. She looked up when
+the American entered, with an expression of surprised inquiry, but
+without alarm.
+
+Goodwin took off his hat and seated himself, with his characteristic
+deliberate ease, upon a corner of the table. He held a lighted cigar
+between his fingers. He took this familiar course because he was
+sure that preliminaries would be wasted upon Miss Guilbert. He knew
+her history, and the small part that the conventions had played in it.
+
+"Good evening," he said. "Now, madame, let us come to business at
+once. You will observe that I mention no names, but I know who is in
+the next room, and what he carries in that valise. That is the point
+which brings me here. I have come to dictate terms of surrender."
+
+The lady neither moved nor replied, but steadily regarded the cigar
+in Goodwin's hand.
+
+"We," continued the dictator, thoughtfully regarding the neat buckskin
+shoe on his gently swinging foot--"I speak for a considerable majority
+of the people--demand the return of the stolen funds belonging to
+them. Our terms go very little further than that. They are very
+simple. As an accredited spokesman, I promise that our interference
+will cease if they are accepted. Give up the money, and you and your
+companion will be permitted to proceed wherever you will. In fact,
+assistance will be given you in the matter of securing a passage
+by any outgoing vessel you may choose. It is on my personal
+responsibility that I add congratulations to the gentleman in Number
+10 upon his taste in feminine charms."
+
+Returning his cigar to his mouth, Goodwin observed her, and saw that
+her eyes followed it and rested upon it with icy and significant
+concentration. Apparently she had not heard a word he had said.
+He understood, tossed the cigar out the window, and, with an amused
+laugh, slid from the table to his feet.
+
+"That is better," said the lady. "It makes it possible for me to
+listen to you. For a second lesson in good manners, you might now
+tell me by whom I am being insulted."
+
+"I am sorry," said Goodwin, leaning one hand on the table, "that my
+time is too brief for devoting much of it to a course of etiquette.
+Come, now; I appeal to you good sense. You have shown yourself,
+in more than one instance, to be well aware of what is to your
+advantage. This is an occasion that demands the exercise of your
+undoubted intelligence. There is no mystery here. I am Frank
+Goodwin; and I have come for the money. I entered this room at a
+venture. Had I entered the other I would have had it before me now.
+Do you want it in words? The gentleman in Number 10 has betrayed
+a great trust. He has robbed his people of a large sum, and it is
+I who will prevent their losing it. I do not say who that gentleman
+is; but if I should be forced to see him and he should prove to be
+a certain high official of the republic, it will be my duty to arrest
+him. The house is guarded. I am offering you liberal terms. It is
+not absolutely necessary that I confer personally with the gentleman
+in the next room. Bring me the valise containing the money, and we
+will call the affair ended."
+
+The lady arose from her chair and stood for a moment, thinking
+deeply.
+
+"Do you live here, Mr. Goodwin?" she asked, presently.
+
+"Yes."
+
+"What is your authority for this intrusion?"
+
+"I am an instrument of the republic. I was advised by wire of the
+movements of the--gentleman in Number 10."
+
+"May I ask you two or three questions? I believe you to be a man
+more apt to be truthful than--timid. What sort of town is this--
+Coralio, I think they call it?"
+
+"Not much of a town," said Goodwin, smiling. "A banana town, as they
+run. Grass huts, 'dobes, five or six two-story houses, accomodations
+limited, population half-breed Spanish and Indian, Caribs and
+blackamoors. No sidewalks to speak of, no amusements. Rather
+unmoral. That'a an offhand sketch, of course."
+
+"Are there any inducements, say in a social or in a business way,
+for people to reside here?"
+
+"Oh, yes," answered Goodwin, smiling broadly. "There are no
+afternoon teas, no hand-organs, no department stores--and there
+is no extradition treaty."
+
+"He told me," went on the lady, speaking as if to herself, and with
+a slight frown, "that there were towns on this coast of beauty and
+importance; that there was a pleasing social order--especially an
+American colony of cultured residents."
+
+"There is an American colony," said Goodwin, gazing at her in some
+wonder. "Some of the members are all right. Some are fugitives from
+justice from the States. I recall two exiled bank presidents, one
+army paymaster under a cloud, a couple of manslayers, and a widow--
+arsenic, I believe, was the suspicion in her case. I myself complete
+the colony, but, as yet, I have not distinguished myself by any
+particular crime."
+
+"Do not lose hope," said the lady, dryly; "I see nothing in your
+actions tonight to guarantee you further obscurity. Some mistake has
+been made; I do not know just where. But ~him~ you shall not disturb
+tonight. The journey has fatigued him so that he has fallen asleep,
+I think, in his clothes. You talk of stolen money! I do not
+understand you. Some mistake has been made. I will convince you.
+Remain where you are and I will bring you the valise that you seem
+to covet so, and show it to you."
+
+She moved toward the closed door that connected the two rooms, but
+stopped, and half turned and bestowed upon Goodwin a grave, searching
+look that ended in a quizzical smile.
+
+"You force my door," she said, "and you follow your ruffianly behavior
+with the basest accusations; and yet"--she hesitated, as if to
+reconsider what she was about to say--"and yet--it is a puzzling
+thing--I am sure there has been some mistake."
+
+She took a step toward the door, but Goodwin stayed her by a light
+touch upon her arm. I have said before that women turned to look
+at him in the streets. He was the viking sort of man, big, good-
+looking, and with an air of kindly truculence. She was dark and
+proud, glowing or pale as her mood moved her. I do not know if Eve
+were light or dark, but if such a woman had stood in the garden
+I know that the apple would have been eaten. This woman was to be
+Goodwin's fate, and he did not know it; but he must have felt the
+first throes of destiny, for, as he faced her, the knowledge of what
+report named her turned bitter in her throat.
+
+"If there has been any mistake," he said, hotly, "it was yours. I do
+not blame the man who has lost his country, his honor, and is about
+to lose the poor consolation of his stolen riches as much as I blame
+you, for, by Heaven! I can very well see how he was brought to it.
+I can understand, and pity him. It is such women as you that strew
+this degraded coast with wretched exiles, that make men forget their
+trusts, that drag--"
+
+The lady interrupted him with a weary gesture.
+
+"There is no need to continue your insults," she said, coldly.
+"I do not understand what you are saying, nor do I know what mad
+blunder you are making; but if the inspection of the contents of
+a gentleman's portmanteau will rid me of you, let us delay it no
+longer."
+
+She passed quickly and noiselessly into the other room, and returned
+with the heavy leather valise, which she handed to the American with
+an air of patient contempt.
+
+Goodwin set the valise quickly upon the table and began to unfasten
+the straps. The Lady stood by, with an expression of infinite scorn
+and weariness upon her face.
+
+The valise opened wide to a powerful, sidelong wrench. Goodwin
+dragged out two or three articles of clothing, exposing the bulk of
+its contents--package after package of tightly packed United States
+bank and treasury notes of large denomination. Reckoning from the
+high figures written upon the paper bands that bound them, the total
+must have come closely upon the hundred thousand mark.
+
+Goodwin glanced swiftly at the woman, and saw, with surprise and
+a thrill of pleasure that he wondered at, that she had experienced
+an unmistakeable shock. Her eyes grew wide, she gasped, and leaned
+heavily against the table. She had been ignorant, then, he inferred,
+that her companion had looted the government treasury. But why,
+he angrily asked himself, should he be so well pleased to think this
+wandering and unscrupulous singer not so black as report had painted
+her?
+
+A noise in the other room startled them both. The door swung open,
+and a tall, elderly, dark complexioned man, recently shaven, hurried
+into the room.
+
+All the pictures of President Miraflores represent him as the
+possessor of a luxuriant supply of dark and carefully tended whiskers;
+but the story of the barber, Esteban, had prepared Goodwin for
+the change.
+
+The man stumbled in from the dark room, his eyes blinking at the
+lamplight, and heavy from sleep.
+
+"What does this mean?" he demanded in excellent English, with a keen
+and perturbed look at the American--"robbery?"
+
+"Very near it," answered Goodwin. "But I rather think I'm in time
+to prevent it. I represent the people to whom this money belongs,
+and I have come to convey it back to them." He thrust his hand into
+a pocket of his loose, linen coat.
+
+The other man's hand went quickly behind him.
+
+"Don't draw," called Goodwin, sharply; "I've got you covered from
+my pocket."
+
+The lady stepped forward, and laid one hand upon the shoulder of her
+hesitating companion. She pointed to the table. "Tell me the truth
+--the truth," she said, in a low voice. "Whose money is that?"
+
+The man did not answer. He gave a deep, long-drawn sigh, leaned
+and kissed her on the forehead, stepped back into the other room
+and closed the door.
+
+Goodwin foresaw his purpose, and jumped for the door, but the report
+of the pistol echoed as his hand touched the knob. A heavy fall
+followed, and some one swept him aside and struggled into the room
+of the fallen man.
+
+A desolation, thought Goodwin, greater than that derived from
+the loss of cavalier and gold must have been in the heart of the
+enchantress to have wrung from her, in that moment, the cry of one
+turning to the all-forgiving, all-comforting earthly consoler--to
+have made her call out from that bloody and dishonored room--"Oh,
+mother, mother, mother!"
+
+But there was an alarm outside. The barber, Esteban, at the sound
+of the shot, had raised his voice; and the shot itself had aroused
+half the town. A pattering of feet came up the street, and official
+orders rang out on the still air. Goodwin had a duty to perform.
+Circumstances had made him the custodian of his adopted country's
+treasure. Swiftly cramming the money into the valise, he closed it,
+leaned far out of the window and dropped it into a thick orange-tree
+in the little inclosure below.
+
+
+They will tell you in Coralio, as they delight in telling the
+stranger, of the conclusion of that tragic flight. They will tell
+you how the upholders of the law came apace when the alarm was
+sounded--the ~Comandante~ in red slippers and a jacket like a head
+waiter's and girded sword, the soldiers with their interminable guns,
+followed by outnumbering officers struggling into their gold and lace
+epaulettes; the bare-footed policemen (the only capables in the lot),
+and ruffled citizens of every hue and description.
+
+They say that the countenance of the dead man was marred sadly by
+the effects of the shot; but he was identified as the fallen president
+by both Goodwin and the barber Esteban. On the next morning messages
+began to come over the mended telegraph wire; and the story of the
+flight from the capital was given out to the public. In San Mateo
+the revolutionary party had seized the sceptre of government, without
+opposition, and the ~vivas~ of the mercurial populace quickly effaced
+the interest belonging to the unfortunate Miraflores.
+
+They will relate to you how the new government sifted the towns
+and raked the roads to find the valise containing Anchuria's surplus
+capital, which the president was known to have carried with him,
+but all in vain. In Coralio Senor Goodwin himself led the searching
+party which combed that town as carefully as a woman combs her hair;
+but the money was not found.
+
+So they buried the dead man, without honors, back of the town near
+the little bridge that spans the mangrove swamp; and for a ~real~
+a boy will show you his grave. They say that the old woman in whose
+hut the barber shaved the president placed the wooden slab at his
+head, and burned the inscription upon it with a hot iron.
+
+You will hear also that Senor Goodwin, like a tower of strength,
+shielded Dona Isabel Guilbert through those subsequent distressful
+days; and that his scruples as to her past career (if he had any)
+vanished; and her adventuresome waywardness (if she had any) left
+her, and they were wedded and were happy.
+
+The American built a home on a little foothill near the town. It is
+a conglomerate structure of native woods that, exported, would be
+worth a fortune, and of brick, palm, glass, bamboo and adobe. There
+is a paradise of nature about it; and something of the same sort
+within. The natives speak of its interior with hands uplifted in
+admiration. There are floors polished like mirrors and covered with
+hand-woven Indian rugs of silk fibre, tall ornaments and pictures,
+musical instruments and papered walls--"figure-it-to-yourself!"
+they exclaim.
+
+But they cannot tell you in Coralio (as you shall learn) what became
+of the money that Frank Goodwin dropped into the orange-tree. But
+that shall come later; for the palms are fluttering in the breeze,
+bidding us to sport and gaiety.
+
+
+
+V
+
+Cupid's Exile Number Two
+
+The United States of America, after looking over its stock of
+consular timber, selected Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood, of
+Dalesburg, Alabama, for a successor to Willard Geddie, resigned.
+
+Without prejudice to Mr. Atwood, it will have to be acknowledged
+that, in this instance, it was the man who sought the office. As
+with the self-banished Geddie, it was nothing less than the artful
+smiles of lovely woman that had driven Johnny Atwood to the desperate
+expedient of accepting office under a despised Federal Government
+so that he might go far, far away and never see again the false, fair
+face that had wrecked his young life. The consulship at Coralio
+seemed to offer a retreat sufficiently removed and romantic enough
+to inject the necessary drama into the pastoral scenes of Dalesburg
+life.
+
+It was while playing the part of Cupid's exile that Johnny added his
+handiwork to the long list of casualties along the Spanish Main by
+his famous manipulation of the shoe market, and his unparalleled feat
+of elevating the most despised and useless weed in his own country
+from obscurity to be a valuable product in international commerce.
+
+The trouble began, as trouble often begins instead of ending, with
+a romance. In Dalesburg there was a man named Elijah Hemstetter, who
+kept a general store. His family consisted of one daughter called
+Rosine, a name that atoned much for "Hemstetter." This young woman
+was possessed of plentiful attractions, so that the young men of
+the community were agitated in their bosoms. Among the more agitated
+was Johnny, the son of Judge Atwood, who lived in the big colonial
+mansion on the edge of Dalesburg.
+
+It would seem that the desirable Rosine should have been pleased to
+return the affection of an Atwood, a name honored all over the state
+long before and since the war. It does seem that she should have
+gladly consented to have been led into that stately but rather empty
+colonial mansion. But not so. There was a cloud on the horizon, a
+threatening, cumulus cloud, in the shape of a lively and shrewd young
+farmer in the neighborhood who dared to enter the lists as a rival to
+the high-born Atwood.
+
+One night Johnny propounded to Rosine a question that is considered
+of much importance by the young of the human species. The accessories
+were all there--moonlight, oleanders, magnolias, the mockingbird's
+song. Whether or no the shadow of Pinkney Dawson, that prosperous
+young farmer came between them on that occasion is not known; but
+Rosine's answer was unfavorable. Mr. John De Graffenreid Atwood bowed
+till his hat touched the lawn grass, and went away with his head high,
+but with a sore wound in his pedigree and heart. A Hemstetter refuse
+an Atwood! Zounds!
+
+Among other accidents of that year was a Democratic president. Judge
+Atwood was a warhorse of Democracy. Johnny persuaded him to set the
+wheels moving for some foreign appointment. He would go away--away.
+Perhaps in years to come Rosine would think how true, how faithful
+his love had been, and would drop a tear--maybe in the cream she
+would be skimming for Pink Dawson's breakfast.
+
+The wheels of politics revolved; and Johnny was appointed consul to
+Coralio. Just before leaving he dropped in at Hemstetter's to say
+good-bye. There was a queer, pinkish look about Rosine's eyes; and
+had the two been alone, the United States might have had to cast
+about for another consul. But Pink Dawson was there, of course,
+talking about his 400-acre orchard, and the three-mile alfalfa tract,
+and the 200-acre pasture. So Johnny shook hands with Rosine as
+coolly as if he were only going to run up to Montgomery for a couple
+of days. They had the royal manner when they chose, those Atwoods.
+
+"If you happen to strike anything in the way of a good investment
+down there, Johnny," said Pink Dawson, "just let me know, will you?
+I reckon I could lay my hands on a few extra thousands 'most any time
+for a profitable deal."
+
+"Certainly, Pink," said Johnny, pleasantly. "If I strike anything of
+that sort I'll let you in with pleasure."
+
+So Johnny went down to Mobile and took a fruit steamer for the coast
+of Anchuria.
+
+When the new consul arrived in Coralio the strangeness of the scenes
+diverted him much. He was only twenty-two; and the grief of youth
+was not worn like a garment as it is by older men. It has its
+seasons when it reigns; and then it is unseated for time by the
+assertion of the keen senses.
+
+Billy Keogh and Johnny seemed to conceive a mutual friendship at
+once. Keogh took the new consul about town and presented him to the
+handful of Americans and the smaller number of French and Germans who
+made up the "foreign" contingent. And then, of course, he had to be
+more formally introduced to the native officials, and have his
+credentials transmitted through an interpreter.
+
+There was something about the young Southerner that the sophisticated
+Keogh liked. His manner was simple almost to boyishness; but he
+possessed the cool carelessness of a man of far greater age and
+experience. Neither uniforms nor titles, red tape nor foreign
+languages, mountains nor sea weighed upon his spirits. He was heir
+to all ages, an Atwood, of Dalesburg; and you might know every
+thought conceived to his bosom.
+
+Geddie came down to the consulate to explain the duties and workings
+of the office. He and Keogh tried to interest the new consul in
+their description of the work that his government expected him to
+perform.
+
+"It's all right," said Johnnie from the hammock that he had set up as
+the official reclining place. "If anything turns up that has to be
+done I'll let you fellows do it. You can't expect a Democrat to work
+during his first term of holding office."
+
+"You might look over these headings," suggested Geddie, "of the
+different lines of exports you will have to keep account of. The
+fruit is classified; and there are the valuable woods, coffee,
+rubber--"
+
+"That last account sounds all right," interrupted Mr. Atwood. "Sounds
+as if it could be stretched. I want to buy a new flag, a monkey, a
+guitar and a barrel of pineapples. Will the rubber account stretch
+over 'em?"
+
+"That's merely statistics," said Geddie, smiling. "The expense
+account is what you want. It is supposed to have a slight elasticity.
+The 'stationery' items are sometimes carelessly audited by the State
+Department."
+
+"We're wasting our time," said Keogh. "This man was born to hold
+office. He penetrates to the root of the art at one step of his
+eagle eye. The true genius of government shows its hand in every
+word of his speech."
+
+"I didn't take this job with any intention of working," explained
+Johnny, lazily. "I wanted to go somewhere in the world where they
+didn't talk about farms. There are none here, are there?"
+
+"Not the kind you are acquainted with," answered the ex-consul.
+"There is no such art here as agriculture. There never was a plow
+or a reaper within the boundaries of Anchuria."
+
+"This is the country for me," murmured the consul, and immediately
+he fell asleep.
+
+The cheerful tintypist pursued his intimacy with Johnny in spite
+of open charges that he did so to obtain a preemption on a seat in
+that coveted spot, the rear gallery of the consulate. But whether
+his designs were selfish or purely friendly, Keogh achieved that
+desirable privilege. Few were the nights on which the two could
+not be found reposing there in the sea breeze, with their heels on
+the railing, and the cigars and brandy conveniently near.
+
+One evening they sat thus, mainly silent, for their talk had dwindled
+before the stilling influence of an unusual night.
+
+There was a great, full moon; and the sea mother-of-pearl. Almost
+every sound was hushed, for the air was but faintly stirring; and
+the town lay panting, waiting for the night to cool. Offshore lay
+the fruit steamer ~Andador~, of the Vesuvius line, full-laden and
+scheduled to sail at six in the morning. There were no loiterers on
+the beach. So bright was the moonlight that the two men could see
+the small pebbles shining on the beach where the gentle surf wetted
+them.
+
+Then down the coast, tacking close to shore, slowly swam a little
+sloop, white-winged like some snowy sea fowl. Its course lay within
+twenty points of the wind's eye; so it veered in and out again in
+long, slow strokes like the movements of a graceful skater.
+
+Again the tactics of its crew brought it close in shore, this time
+nearly opposite the consulate; and then there blew from the sloop
+clear and surprising notes as if from a horn of elfland. A fairy
+bugle it might have been, sweet and silvery and unexpected, playing
+with spirit the familiar air of "Home, Sweet Home."
+
+It was a scene set for the land of the lotus. The authority of the
+sea and the tropics, the mystery that attends unknown sails, and the
+prestige of drifting music on moonlit waters gave it an anodynous
+charm. Johnny Atwood felt it, and thought of Dalesburg; but as soon
+as Keogh's mind had arrived at a theory concerning the peripatetic
+solo he sprang to the railing, and his ear-rending yawp fractured
+the silence of Coralio like a cannon shot.
+
+"Mel-lin-ger a-hoy!"
+
+The sloop was now on its outward tack; but from it came a clear,
+answering hail:
+
+"Good-bye, Billy... go-ing home--bye!"
+
+The ~Andador~ was the sloop's destination. No doubt some passenger
+with a sailing permit from some up-the-coast point had come down
+in this sloop to catch the regular fruit steamer on its return trip.
+Like a coquettish pigeon the little boat tacked on its eccentric way
+until at last its white sail was lost to sight against the larger
+bulk of the fruiter's side.
+
+"That's old H. P. Mellinger," explained Keogh, dropping back into his
+chair. "He's going back to New York. He was a private secretary of
+the late hot-foot president of this grocery and fruit stand that they
+call a country. His job's over now; and I guess old Mellinger is
+glad."
+
+"Why does he disappear to music, like Zo-zo, the magic queen?" asked
+Johnny. "Just to show 'em that he doesn't care?"
+
+"That noise you heard is a phonograph," said Keogh. "I sold him
+that. Mellinger had a graft in this country that was the only thing
+of its kind in the world. The tooting machine saved it for him once,
+and he always carried it around with him afterward."
+
+"Tell me about it," demanded Johnny, betraying interest.
+
+"I'm no disseminator of narratives," said Keogh. "I can use language
+for purposes of speech; but when I attempt a discourse the words come
+out as they will, and they may make sense when they strike the
+atmosphere, or they may not."
+
+"I want to hear about the graft," persisted Johnny, "You've got no
+right to refuse. I've told you all about every man, woman and
+hitching post in Dalesburg."
+
+"You shall hear it," said Keogh. "I said my instincts of narrative
+were perplexed. Don't you believe it. It's an art I've acquired
+along with many other of the graces and sciences."
+
+
+
+VI
+
+The Phonograph and the Graft
+
+"What was this this graft? asked Johnny, with the impatience of
+the great public to whom tales are told.
+
+"'Tis contrary to art and philosophy to give you the information,"
+said Keogh, calmly. "The art of narrative consists in concealing
+from your audience everything it wants to know until after you expose
+your favorite opinions on topics foreign to the subject. A good
+story is like a bitter pill with the sugar coating inside of it.
+I will begin, if you please, with a horoscope located in the Cherokee
+Nation; and end with a moral tune on the phonograph.
+
+"Me and Henry Horsecollar brought the first phonograph to this
+country. Henry was a quarter-breed, quarter-back cherokee, educated
+East in the idioms of football, and West in contraband whiskey, and
+a gentleman, the same as you and me. He was easy and romping in
+his ways; a man about six foot, with a kind of rubber-tire movement.
+Yes, he was a little man about five foot five, or five foot eleven.
+He was what you would call a medium tall man of average smallness.
+Henry had quit college once, and the Muscogee jail three times--the
+last-named institution on account of introducing and selling whisky
+in the territories. Henry Horsecollar never let any cigar stores
+come up and stand behind him. He didn't belong to that tribe of
+Indians.
+
+"Henry and me met at Texarkana, and figured out this phonograph
+scheme. He had $360 which came to him out of a land allotment
+in the reservation. I had run down from Little Rock on account
+of a distressful scene I had witnessed on the street there. A man
+stood on a box and passed around some gold watches, screw case,
+stem-winders, Elgin movement, very elegant. Twenty bucks they cost
+you over the counter. At three dollars the crowd fought for the
+tickers. The man happened to find a valise full of them handy, and
+he passed them out like putting hot biscuits on a plate. The backs
+were hard to unscrew, but the crowd put its ear to the case, and
+they ticked mollifying and agreeable. Three of these watches were
+genuine tickers; the rest were only kickers. Hey? Why, empty cases
+with one of them horny black bugs that fly around electric lights
+in 'em. Them bugs kick off minutes and seconds industrious and
+beautiful. So, this man I was speaking of cleaned up $288; and then
+he went away, because he knew that when it came time to wind watches
+in Little Rock an entomologist would be needed, and he wasn't one.
+
+"So, as I say, Henry had $360 and I had $288. The idea of introducing
+the phonograph to South America was Henry's; but I took to it freely,
+being fond of machinery of all kinds.
+
+"'The Latin races,' says Henry, explaining easy in the idioms he
+learned at college, 'are peculiarly adapted to be victims of the
+phonograph. They yearn for music and color and gaiety. They give
+wampum to the hand-organ man and the four-legged chicken in the tent
+when they're three months behind with the grocery and the bread-fruit
+tree."
+
+"'Then,' says I, 'we'll export canned music to the Latins; but I'm
+mindful of Mr. Julius Caesar's account of 'em where he says: ~"Omnia
+Gallia in tres partes divisa est"~; which is the same as to say, "We
+will need all of our gall in devising means to tree them parties."'
+
+"I hated to make a show of education; but I was disinclined to be
+overdone in syntax by a mere Indian, a member of a race to which we
+owe nothing except the land on which the United States is situated.
+
+"We bought a fine phonograph in Texarkana--one of the best make--and
+half a trunkful of records. We packed up, and took the T. and P.
+for New Orleans. From that celebrated center of molasses and
+disfranchised coon songs we took a steamer for South America.
+
+"We landed at Solitas, forty miles up the coast from here. 'Twas
+a palatable enough place to look at. The houses were clean and white;
+and to look at 'em stuck around among the scenery they reminded you
+of hard-boiled eggs served with lettuce. There was a block of
+skyscraper mountains in the suburbs; and they kept pretty quiet,
+like they had crept up there and were watching the town. And the sea
+was remarking 'Sh-sh-sh' on the beach; and now and then a ripe coconut
+would drop kerblip in the sand; and that was all there was doing.
+Yes, I judge that town was considerably on the quiet. I judge that
+after Gabriel quits blowing his horn, and the car starts, with
+Philadelphia swinging to the last strap, and Pine Gully, Arkansas,
+hanging onto the rear step, this town of Solitas will wake up and ask
+if anybody spoke.
+
+"The captain went ashore with us, and offered to conduct what he
+seemed to like to call the obsequies. He introduced Henry and me to
+the United States Consul, and a roan man, the head of the Department
+of Mercenary and Licentious Dispostions, the way it read upon his
+sign.
+
+"'I thouch here again a week from today,' says the captain.
+
+"'By that time,' we told him, 'we'll be amassing wealth in the
+interior towns with our galvanized prima donna and correct imitations
+of Sousa's band excavating a march from a tin mine.'
+
+"'Ye'll not,' says the captain. 'Ye'll be hypnotized. Any gentleman
+in the audience who kindly steps upon the stage and looks this country
+in the eye will be converted to the hypothesis that he's but a fly
+in the Elgin creamery. Ye'll be standing knee deep in the surf
+waiting for me, and your machine for making Hamburger steak out of
+the hitherto respected art of music will be playing "There's no place
+like home."'
+
+"Henry skinned a twenty off his roll, and received from the Bureau
+of Mercenary Dispositions a paper bearing a red seal and a dialect
+story, and no change.
+
+"Then we got the consul full of red wine, and struck him for a
+horoscope. He was a thin, youngish kind of man, I should say past
+fifty, sort of French-Irish in his affections, and puffed up with
+disconsolation. Yes, he was a flattened kind of man, in whom drink
+lay stagnant, inclined to corpulence and misery. Yes, I think he
+was a kind of Dutchman, being very sad and genial in his ways.
+
+"'The marvelous invention,' he says, 'entitled the phonograph, has
+never invaded these shores. The people have never heard it. They
+would not believe it if they should. Simple-hearted children of
+nature, progress has never condemned them to accept the work of
+a can-opener as an overture, and rag-time might incite them to a
+bloody revolution. But you can try the experiment. The best chance
+you have is that the populace may not wake up when you play. There's
+two ways,' says the consul, 'they may take it. They may become
+inebriated with attention, like an Atlanta colonel listening to
+"Marching Through Georgia," or they will get excited and transpose
+the key of the music with an axe and yourselves into a dungeon. In
+the latter case,' says the consul, 'I'll do my duty by cabling to the
+State Department, and I'll wrap the Stars and Stripes around you when
+you come to be shot, and threaten them with the vengeance of the
+greatest gold export and financial reserve nation on earth. The flag
+is full of bullet holes now,' says the consul, 'made in that way.
+Twice before,' says the consul, 'I have cabled our government for a
+couple of gunboats to protect American citizens. The first time the
+Department sent me a pair of gum boots. The other time was when a man
+named Pease was going to be executed here. They referred that appeal
+to the Secretary of Agriculture. Let us now disturb the senor behind
+the bar for a subsequence of the red wine.'
+
+"Thus soliloquized the consul of Solitas to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+
+"But, notwithstanding, we hired a room that afternoon in the Calle de
+los Angeles, the main street that runs along the shore, and put our
+trunks there. 'Twas a good-sized room, dark and cheerful, but small.
+'Twas on a various street, diversified by houses and conservatory
+plants. The peasantry of the city passed to and fro on the fine
+pasturage between the sidewalks. 'Twas, for the world, like an opera
+chorus when the Royal Kafoozlum is about to enter.
+
+"We were rubbing the dust off the machine and getting fixed to start
+business the next day, when a big, fine-looking white man in white
+clothes stopped at the door and looked in. We extended the
+invitations, and he walked inside and sized us up. He was chewing
+a long cigar, and wrinkling his eyes, meditative, like a girl trying
+to decide which dress to wear to the party.
+
+"'New York?' he says to me finally.
+
+"'Originally, and from time to time,' I says. 'Hasn't it rubbed off
+yet?'
+
+"'It's simple,' says he, 'when you know how. It's the fit of
+the vest. They don't cut vests right anywhere else. Coats, maybe,
+but not vests.'
+
+"The white man looks at Henry Horsecollar and hesitates.
+
+"'Injun,' says Henry; 'tame Injun.'
+
+"'Mellinger,' says the man--'Homer P. Mellinger. Boys, you're
+confiscated. You're babes in the wood without a chaperon or referee,
+and it's my duty to start you going. I'll knock out the props and
+launch you proper in the pellucid waters of this tropical mud puddle.
+You'll have to be christened, and if you'll come with me I'll break
+a bottle of wine across your bows, according to Hoyle.'
+
+"Well, for two days Homer P. Mellinger did the honors. That man cut
+ice in Anchuria. He was It. He was the Royal Kafoozlum. If me and
+Henry was babes in the wood, he was a Robin Redbreast from the topmost
+bough. Him and me and Henry Horsecollar locked arms, and toted that
+phonograph around, and had wassail and diversions. Everywhere we
+found doors open we went inside and set the machine going, and
+Mellinger called upon the people to observe the artful music and his
+two lifelong friends, the Senores Americanos. The opera chorus was
+agitated with esteem, and followed us from house to house. There was
+a different kind of drink to be had with every tune. The natives
+had acquirements of a pleasant thing in the way of a drink that gums
+itself to the recollection. They chop off the end of a green coconut,
+and pour in on the juice of it French brandy and other adjuvants.
+We had them and other things.
+
+"Mine and Henry's money was counterfeit. Everything was on Homer
+P. Mellinger. That man could find rolls of bills concealed in places
+on his person where Hermann the Wizard couldn't have conjured out a
+rabbit or an omelette. He could have founded universities, and made
+orchid collections, and then had enough left to purchase the colored
+vote of his country. Henry and me wondered what his graft was. One
+evening he told us.
+
+"'Boys, said he, I've deceived you. You think I'm a painted
+butterfly; but in fact I'm the hardest worked man in this country.
+Ten years ago I landed on its shores; and two years ago on the point
+of its jaw. Yes, I guess I can get the decision over this ginger cake
+commonwealth at the end of any round I choose. I'll confide in you
+because you are my countrymen and guests, even if you have assaulted
+my adopted shores with the worst system of noises ever set to music.
+
+"'My job is private secretary to the president of this republic;
+and my duties are running it. I'm not headlined in the bills, but I'm
+the mustard in the salad dressing just the same. There isn't a law
+goes before Congress, there isn't a concession granted, there isn't
+an import duty levied but what H. P. Mellinger he cooks and seasons
+it. In the front office I fill the president's inkstand and search
+visiting statesmen for dirks and dynamite; but in the back room I
+dictate the policy of the government. You'd never guess in the world
+how I got my pull. It's the only graft of its kind on earth. I'll
+put you wise. You remember the old top-liner in the copy book--
+Honesty is the Best Policy?" That's it. I'm working honestly for a
+graft. I'm the only honest man in the republic. The government knows
+it; the people know it; the boodlers know it; the foreign investors
+know it. I make the government keep its faith. If a man is promised
+a job he gets it. If outside capital buys a concession it gets
+the goods. I run the monopoly of square dealing here. There's no
+competition. If Colonel Diogenes were to flash his lantern in this
+precinct he'd have my address inside of two minutes. There isn't big
+money in it, but it's a sure thing, and lets a man sleep of nights.'
+
+"Thus Homer P. Mellinger made oration to me and Henry Horsecollar.
+And, later, he divested himself of this remark:
+
+"'Boys, I'm to hold a ~soiree~ this evening with a gang of leading
+citizens, and I want your assistance. You bring the musical corn
+sheller and give the affair the outside appearance of a function.
+There's important business on hand, but it mustn't show. I can talk
+to you people. I've been pained for years on account of not having
+anybody to blow off and brag to. I get homesick sometimes, and I'd
+swap the entire perquisites of office for just one hour to have a
+stein and a caviar sandwich somewhere on Thirty-fourth Street, and
+stand and watch the street cars go by, and smell the peanut roaster
+at old Giuseppe's fruit stand.'
+
+"'Yes,' said I, 'there's fine caviar at Billy Renfrew's cafe, corner
+of Thirty-fourth and--'
+
+"'God knows it,' interrupts Mellinger, 'and if you'd told me you knew
+Billy Renfrew I'd have invented tons of ways of making you happy.
+Billy was my side-kicker in New York. There is a man who never knew
+what crooked was. Here I am working Honesty for a graft, but that
+man loses money on it. Carrambos! I get sick at times of this
+country. Everything's rotten. From the executive down to the coffee
+pickers, they're plotting to down each other and skin their friends.
+If a mule driver takes off his hat to an official, that man figures
+it out that he's a popular idol, and set his pegs to stir up a
+revolution and upset the administration. It's one of my little chores
+as private secretary to smell out these revolutions and affix the
+kibosh before they break out and scratch the paint off the government
+property. That's why I'm down here now in this mildewed coast town.
+The governor of the district and his crew are plotting to uprise.
+I've got every one of their names, and they're invited to listen
+to the phonograph tonight, compliments of H. P. M. That's the way
+I'll get them in a bunch, and things are on the program to happen
+to them.'
+
+"We three were sitting at table in the cantina of the Purified Saints.
+Mellinger poured out wine, and was looking some worried; I was
+thinking.
+
+"'They're a sharp crowd,' he says, kind of fretful. 'They're
+capitalized by a foreign syndicate after rubber, and they're loaded
+to the muzzle for bribing. I'm sick,' goes on Mellinger, 'of comic
+opera. I want to smell East River and wear suspenders again. At
+times I feel loke throwing up my job, but I'm d--n fool enough to
+be sort of proud of it. "There's Mellinger," they say here. "~Por
+dios!~ you can't touch him with a million." I'd like to take that
+record back and show it to Billy Renfrow some day; and that tightens
+my grip whenever I see a fat thing that I could corral just by
+winking one eye--and losing my graft. By--, they can't monkey
+with me. They know it. What money I get I make honest and spend it.
+Some day, I'll make a pile and go back and eat caviar with Billy.
+Tonight I'll show you how to handle a bunch of corruptionists. I'll
+show them what Mellinger, private secretary, means when you spell it
+with the cotton and tissue paper off.'
+
+"Mellinger appears shaky, and breaks his glass against the neck of
+the bottle.
+
+"I says to myself, 'White man, if I'm not mistaken there's been a
+bait laid out where the tail of your eye could see it.'
+
+"That night, according to arrangements, me and Henry took the
+phonograph to a room in a 'dobe house in a dirty side street, where
+the grass was knee high. 'Twas a long room, lit with smoky oil lamps.
+There was plenty of chairs, and a table at the back end. We set the
+phonograph on the table. Mellinger was there, walking up and down,
+disturbed in his predicaments. He chewed cigars and spat 'em out,
+and he bit the thumb nail of his left hand.
+
+"By and by the invitations to the musicale come sliding in by pairs
+and threes and spade flushes. Their color was of a diversity, running
+from a three-day's smoked meerschaum to a patent-leather polish.
+They were as polite as wax, being devastated with enjoyments to give
+Senor Mellinger the good evenings. I understood their Spanish talk
+--I ran a pumping engine two years in a Mexican silver mine, and had
+it pat--but I never let on.
+
+"Maybe fifty of 'em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king
+bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door,
+and escorted him to the grand stand. When I saw that Latin man I
+knew that Mellinger, private secretary, had all the dances on his card
+taken. That was a big, squashy man, the color of a rubber overshoe,
+and he had an eye like a head waiter's.
+
+"Mellinger explained, fluent, in the Castilian idioms, that his soul
+was disconcerted with joy at introducing to his respected friends
+America's greatest invention, the wonder of the age. Henry got the
+cue and run on an elegant brass-band record and the festivities became
+initiated. The governor man had a bit of English under his hat, and
+when the music was choked off he says:
+
+"'Ver-r-ree fine. ~Gr-r'r-r-racias~, the American gentlemen, the so
+esplendeed moosic as to playee.'
+
+"The table was a long one, and Henry and me sat at the end of it next
+the wall. The governor sat at the other end. Homer P. Mellinger
+stood at the side of it. I was just wondering how Mellinger was
+going to handle his crowd, when the home talent suddenly opened the
+services.
+
+"That governor man was suitable for uprisings and policies. I judge
+he was a ready kind of man, who took his own time. Yes, he was full
+of attention and immediateness. He leaned his hands on the table and
+imposed his face toward the secretary man.
+
+"'Do the American senors understand Spanish?' he asks in his native
+accents.
+
+"'They do not,' says Mellinger.
+
+"'Then listen,' goes on the Latin man, prompt. 'The musics are
+of sufficient prettiness, but not of necessity. Let us speak
+of business. I well know why we are here, since I observe my
+compatriots. You had a whisper yesterday, Senor Mellinger, of our
+proposals. Tonight we will speak out. We know that you stand in
+the president's favor, and we know your influence. The government
+will be changed. We know the worth of your services. We esteem
+your friendship and aid so much that'--Mellinger praises his hand,
+but the governor man bottles him up. 'Do not speak until I have
+done.'
+
+"The governor man then draws a package wrapped in paper from his
+pocket, and lays it on the table by Mellinger's hand.
+
+"'In that you will find fifty thousand dollars in money of your
+country. You can do nothing against us, but you can be worth that
+for us. Go back to the capital and obey our instructions. Take
+that money now. We trust you. You will find with it a paper giving
+in detail the work you will be expected to do for us. Do not have
+the unwiseness to refuse.'
+
+"'The governor man paused, with his eyes fixed on Mellinger, full
+of expressions and observances. I looked at Mellinger, and was glad
+Billy Renfrew couldn't see him then. The sweat was popping out on his
+forehead, and he stood dumb, tapping the little package with the ends
+of his fingers. The colorado-maduro gang was after his graft. He had
+only to change his politics, and stuff five fingers in his inside
+pocket.
+
+"Henry whispers to me and wants the pause in the program interpreted.
+I whisper back: 'H. P. is up against a bribe, senator's size, and the
+coons have got him going.' I saw Mellinger's hand moving closer to
+the package. 'He's weakening,' I whispered to Henry. 'We'll remind
+him,' says Henry, 'of the peanut-roaster on Thirty-fourth Street,
+New York."
+
+"Henry stooped down and got a record from the basketful we'd brought,
+slid it in the phonograph, and started her off. It was a cornet solo,
+very neat and beautiful, and the name of it was 'Home, Sweet Home.'
+Not one of them fifty odd men in the room moved while it was playing,
+and the governor man kept his eyes steady on Mellinger. I saw
+Mellinger's head go up little by little and his hand came creeping
+away from the package. Not until the last note sounded did anybody
+stir. And there Homer P. Mellinger takes up the bundle of boodle
+and slams it in the governor man's face.
+
+"'That's my answer,' says Mellinger, private secretary, 'and there'll
+be another in the morning. I have proofs of conspiracy against every
+man of you. The show is over, gentlemen.'
+
+"'There's one more act,' puts in the governor man. 'You are a
+servant, I believe, employed by the president to copy letters and
+answer raps at the door. I am governor here. Senores, I call upon
+you in the name of the cause to seize this man.'
+
+"That brindled gang of conspirators shoved back their chairs and
+advanced in force. I could see where Mellinger had made a mistake in
+massing his enemy so as to make a grand-stand play. I think he made
+another one, too; but we can pass that, Mellinger's idea of a graft
+and mine being different, according to estimations and points of view.
+
+"There was only one window and door in that room, and they were in
+the front end. Here was fifty odd Latin men coming in a bunch to
+obstruct the legislation of Mellinger. You may say there were three
+of us, for me and Henry, simultaneous, declared New York City and
+the Cherokee Nation in sympathy with the weaker party.
+
+"Then it was that Henry Horsecollar rose to a point of disorder and
+intervened, showing, admirable, the advantages of education as applied
+to the American Indian's natural intellect and native refinement.
+He stood up and smoothed back his hair on each side with his hands
+as you have seen little girls do when they play.
+
+"'Get behind me, both of you,' says Henry
+
+"'What's it to be, chief?' I asked.
+
+"'I'm going to buck center,' says Henry, in his football idioms.
+There isn't a tackle in the lot of them. Follow me close, and rush
+the game.'
+
+"'Then that cultured Red Man exhaled an arrangement of sounds with
+his mouth that made the Latin aggregation pause, with thoughtfulness
+and hesitations. The matter of his proclamation seemed to be a
+cooperation of the Carlisle war-whoop with the Cherokee college yell.
+He went at the chocolate team like a bean out of a little boy's nigger
+shooter. His right elbow laid out the governor man on the gridiron,
+and he made a lane the length of the crowd so wide that a woman
+could have carried a stepladder through it without striking against
+anything. All Mellinger and me had to do was to follow.
+
+"It took us just three minutes to get out of that street around
+to military headquarters, where Mellinger had things his own way.
+A colonel and a battalion of bare-toed infantry turned out and went
+back to the scene of the musicale with us, but the conspirator gang
+was gone. But we recaptured the phonograph with honors of war, and
+marched back to the ~cuartel~ with it playing 'All Coons Look Alike
+to Me.'
+
+"The next day Mellinger takes me and Henry to one side, and begins
+to shed tens and twenties.
+
+"'I want to buy that phonograph,' says he. I liked that last tune
+it played at the ~soiree~.'
+
+"'This is more money than the machine is worth,' says I.
+
+"'Tis government expense money,' says Mellinger. The government pays
+for it, and it's getting the tune-grinder cheap.'
+
+"Me and Henry knew that pretty well. We knew that it had saved Homer
+P. Mellinger's graft when he was on the point of losing it; but we
+never let him know we knew it.
+
+"'Now you boys better slide off further down the coast for a while,'
+says Mellinger, 'till I get the screws put on these fellows here.
+If you don't they'll give you trouble. And if you ever happen to see
+Billy Renfrew again before I do, tell him I'm coming back to New York
+as soon as I can make a stake--honest.'
+
+"Me and Henry laid low until the day the steamer came back. When we
+saw the captain's boat on the beach we went down and stood in the edge
+of the water. The captain grinned when he saw us.
+
+"'I told you you'd be waiting,' he says. 'Where's the Hamburger
+machine?'
+
+"'It stays behind,' I says, 'to play "Home, Sweet Home."'
+
+"'I told you so,' says the captain again. 'Climb in the boat.'
+
+"And that," said Keogh, "is the way me and Henry Horsecollar
+introduced the phonograph into this country. Henry went back to
+the States, but I've been rummaging around in the tropics ever since.
+They say Mellinger never travelled a mile after that without his
+phonograph. I guess it kept him reminded about his graft whenever
+he saw the siren voice of the boodler tip him the wink with a bribe
+in his hand."
+
+"I suppose he's taking it home with him as a souvenir, remarked the
+consul.
+
+"Not as a souvenir," said Keogh. "He'll need two of 'em in New York,
+running day and night."
+
+
+
+VII
+
+Money Maze
+
+The new administration of Anchuria entered upon its duties and
+privileges with enthusiasm. Its first act was to send an agent
+to Coralio with imperative orders to recover, if possible, the sum
+of money ravished from the treasury by the ill-fated Miraflores.
+
+Colonel Emilio Falcon, the private secretary of Losada, the new
+president, was despatched from the capital upon this important
+mission.
+
+The position of private secretary to a tropical president is
+a responsible one. He must be a diplomat, a spy, a ruler of men,
+a body-guard to his chief, and a smeller-out of plots and nascent
+revolutions. Often he is the power behind the throne, the dictator
+of policy; and a president chooses him with a dozen times the care
+with which he selects a matrimonial mate.
+
+Colonel Falcon, a handsome and urbane gentleman of Castilian courtesy
+and debonnaire manners, came to Coralio with the task before him of
+striking upon the cold trail of the lost money. There he conferred
+with the military authorities, who had received instructions to
+cooperate with him in the search.
+
+Colonel Falcon established his headquarters in one of the rooms of
+the Casa Morena. Here for a week he held informal sittings--much as
+if he were a kind of unified grand jury--and summoned before him all
+those whose testimony might illumine the financial tragedy that had
+accompanied the less momentous one of the late president's death.
+
+Two or three who were thus examined, among whom was the barber
+Esteban, declared that they had identified the body of the president
+before its burial.
+
+"Of a truth," testified Esteban before the mighty secretary, "it was
+he, the president. Consider!--how could I shave a man and not see his
+face? He sent for me to shave him in a small house. He had a beard
+very black and thick. Had I ever seen the president before? Why not?
+I saw him once ride forth in a carriage from the ~vapor~ in Solitas.
+When I shaved him he gave me a gold piece, and said there was to be no
+talk. But I am a Liberal--I am devoted to my country--and I spake of
+these things to Senor Goodwin."
+
+"It is known," said Colonel Falcon, smoothly, "that the late President
+took with him an American leather valise, containing a large amount of
+money. Did you see that?"
+
+"~De veras~--no," Esteban answered. "The light in the little house
+was but a small lamp by which I could scarcely see to shave the
+President. Such a thing there may have been, but I did not see it.
+No. Also in the room was a young lady--a senorita of much beauty--
+that I could see even in so small a light. But the money, senor, or
+the thing in which it was carried--that I did not see."
+
+The ~comandante~ and other officers gave testimony that they had been
+awakened and alarmed by the noise of a pistol-shot in the Hotel de
+los Extranjeros. Hurrying thither to protect the peace and dignity
+of the republic, they found a man lying dead, with a pistol clutched
+in his hand. Beside him was a young woman, weeping sorely. Senor
+Goodwin was also in the room when they entered it. But of the valise
+of money they saw nothing.
+
+Madame Timotea Ortiz, the proprietress of the hotel in which the game
+of Fox-in-the-Morning had been played out, told of the coming of the
+two guests to her house.
+
+"To my house they came," said she--"one ~senor~ not quite old, and
+one ~senorita~ of sufficient handsomeness. They desired not to eat
+or to drink--not even of my ~aguardiente~, which is the best. To
+their rooms they ascended--~Numero Nueve~ and ~Numero Diez~. Later
+came Senor Goodwin, who ascended to speak with them. Then I heard
+a great noise like that of a ~canon~, and they said that the ~pobre
+Presidente~ had shot himself. ~Esta bueno~. I saw nothing of money
+or of the thing you call ~veliz~ that you say he carried it in."
+
+Colonel Falcon soon came to the reasonable conclusion that if any one
+in Coralio could furnish a clue to the vanished money, Frank Goodwin
+must be the man. But the wise secretary pursued a different course
+in seeking information from the American. Goodwin was a powerful
+friend to the new administration, and one who was not to be carelessly
+dealt with in respect to either his honesty or his courage. Even
+the private secretary of His Excellency hesitated to have this rubber
+prince and mahogany baron haled before him as a common citizen
+of Anchuria. So he sent Goodwin a flowery epistle, each word-petal
+dripping with honey, requesting the favor of an interview. Goodwin
+replied with an invitation to dinner at his own house.
+
+Before the hour named the American walked over to the Casa Morena,
+and greeted his guest frankly and friendly. Then the two strolled,
+in the cool of the afternoon, to Goodwin's home in the environs.
+
+The American left Colonel Falcon in a big, cool, shadowed room
+with a floor of inlaid and polished woods that any millionaire
+in the States Would have envied, excusing himself for a few minutes.
+He crossed a ~patio~, shaded with deftly arranged awnings and plants,
+and entered a long room looking upon the sea in the opposite wing
+of the house. The broad jalousies were opened wide, and the ocean
+breeze flowed in through the room, an invisible current of coolness
+and health. Goodwin's wife sat near one of the windows, making
+a water-color sketch of the afternoon seascape.
+
+Here was a woman who looked to be happy. And more--she looked to
+be content. Had a poet been inspired to pen just similes concerning
+her favor, he would have likened her full, clear eyes, with their
+white-encircled, gray irises, to moonflowers. With none of the
+goddesses whose traditional charms have become coldly classic
+would the discerning rhymester have compared her. She was purely
+Paradisaic, not Olympian. If you can imagine Eve, after the eviction,
+beguiling the flaming warriors and serenely reentering the Garden,
+you will have her. Just so human, and still so harmonious with Eden
+seemed Mrs. Goodwin.
+
+When her husband entered she looked up, and her lips curved and
+parted; her eyelids fluttered twice or thrice--a movement remindful
+(Proesy forgive us!) of the tail-wagging of a faithful dog--and a
+little ripple went through her like the commotion set up in a weeping
+willow by a puff of wind. Thus she ever acknowledged his coming,
+were it twenty times a day. If they who sometimes sat over their wine
+in Coralio, reshaping old, diverting stories of the madcap career
+of Isabel Guilbert, could have seen the wife of Frank Goodwin that
+afternoon in the estimable aura of her happy wifehood, they might
+have disbelieved, or have agreed to forget, those graphic annals of
+the life of the one for whom their president gave up his country and
+his honor.
+
+"I have brought a guest to dinner," said Goodwin. "One Colonel
+Falcon, from San Mateo. He is come on government business. I do not
+think you will care to see him, so I prescribe for you one of those
+convenient and indisputable feminine headaches."
+
+"He has come to inquire about the lost money, has he not?" asked
+Mrs. Goodwin, going on with her sketch.
+
+"A good guess!" acknowledged Goodwin. "He has been holding an
+inquisition among the natives for three days. I am next on his list
+of witnesses, but as he feels shy about dragging one of Uncle Sam's
+subjects before him, he consents to give it the outward appearance
+of a social function. He will apply the torture over my own wine
+and provender."
+
+"Has he found any one who saw the valise of money?"
+
+"Not a soul. Even Madama Ortiz, whose eyes are so sharp for the sight
+of a revenue official, does not remember that there was any baggage."
+
+Mrs. Goodwin laid down her brush and sighed.
+
+"I am so sorry, Frank," she said, "that they are giving you so much
+trouble about the money. But we can't let them know about it, can
+we?"
+
+"Not without doing our intelligence a great injustice," said Goodwin,
+with a smile and a shrug that he had picked up from the natives.
+"~Americano~, though I am, they would have me in the ~calaboza~ in
+half an hour if they knew we had appropriated that valise. No; we
+must appear as ignorant about the money as the other ignoramuses in
+Coralio."
+
+"Do you think that this man they have sent suspects you?" she asked,
+with a little pucker of her brows. "He'd better not," said the
+American, carelessly. "It's lucky that no one caught a sight of the
+valise except myself. As I was in the rooms when the shot was fired,
+it is not surprising that they should want to investigate my part
+in the affair rather closely. But there's no cause for alarm.
+This colonel is down on the list of events for a good dinner, with
+a dessert of American 'bluff' that will end the matter, I think."
+
+Mrs. Goodwin rose and walked to the window. Goodwin followed and
+stood by her side. She leaned to him, and rested in the protection
+of his strength, as she had always rested since that dark night
+on which he had first made himself her tower of refuge. Thus they
+stood for a little while.
+
+Straight through the lavish growth of tropical branch and leaf and
+vine that confronted them had been cunningly trimmed a vista, that
+ended at the cleared environs of Coralio, on the banks of the mangrove
+swamp. At the other end of the aerial tunnel they could see the grave
+and wooden headpiece that bore the name of the unhappy President
+Miraflores. From this window when the rains forbade the open,
+and from the green and shady slopes of Goodwin's fruitful lands when
+the skies were smiling, his wife was wont to look upon that grave
+with a gentle sadness that was now scarcely a mar to her happiness.
+
+"I loved him so, Frank!" she said, "even after that terrible flight
+and its awful ending. And you have been so good to me, and have made
+me so happy. It has all grown into such a strange puzzle. If they
+were to find out that we got the money do you think they would force
+you to make the amount good to the government?"
+
+"They would undoubtedly try," answered Goodwin. "You are right about
+its being a puzzle. And it must remain a puzzle to Falcon and all
+his countrymen until it solves itself. You and I, who know more than
+any one else, only know half of the solution. We must not let even
+a hint about this money get abroad. Let them come to the theory that
+the president concealed it in the mountains during his journey, or
+that he found means to ship it out of the country before he reached
+Coralio. I don't think that Falcon suspects me. He is making
+a closer investigation, according to his orders, but he will find out
+nothing."
+
+Thus they spake together. Had any one overheard or overseen them
+as they discussed the lost funds of Anchuria there would have been
+a second puzzle presented. For upon the faces and in the bearing
+of each of them was visible (if countenances are to be believed) Saxon
+honesty and pride and honorable thoughts. In Goodwin's steady eye
+and firm lineaments, molded into material shape by the inward spirit
+of kindness and generosity and courage, there was nothing reconcilable
+with his words.
+
+As for his wife, physiognomy championed her even in the face of their
+accusive talk. Nobility was in her guise; purity was in her glance.
+The devotion that she manifested had not even the appearance of that
+feeling that now and then inspires a woman to share the guilt of
+her partner out of the pathetic greatness other love. No, there was
+a discrepancy here between what the eye would have seen and the ear
+have heard.
+
+Dinner was served to Goodwin and his guest in the patio, under cool
+foliage and flowers. The American begged the illustrious secretary
+to excuse the absence of Mrs. Goodwin, who was suffering, he said,
+from a headache brought on by a slight ~calentura~.
+
+After the meal they lingered, according to the custom, over their
+coffee and cigars. Colonel Falcon, with true Castilian delicacy,
+waited for his host to open the question that they had met to discuss.
+He had not long to wait. As soon as the cigars were lighted,
+the American cleared the way by inquiring whether the secretary's
+investigations in the town had furnished him with any clue to
+the lost funds.
+
+"I have found no one yet," admitted Colonel Falcon, "who even had
+sight of the valise or the money. Yet I have persisted. It has
+been proven in the capital that President Miraflores set out
+from San Mateo with one hundred thousand dollars belonging to the
+government, accompanied by Senorita Isabel Guilbert, the opera singer.
+The Government, officially and personally, is loathe to believe,"
+concluded Colonel Falcon, with a smile, "that our late President's
+tastes would have permitted him to abandon on the route, as excess
+baggage, either of the desirable articles with which his flight was
+burdened."
+
+"I suppose you would like to hear what I have to say about the
+affair," said Goodwin, coming directly to the point. "It will not
+require many words."
+
+"On that night, with others of our friends here, I was keeping
+a lookout for the president, having been notified of his flight
+by a telegram in our national cipher from Englehart, one of our
+leaders in the capital. About ten o'clock that night I saw a man
+and a woman hurrying along the streets. They went to the Hotel de
+los Extranjeros, and engaged rooms. I followed them upstairs, leaving
+Esteban, who had come up, to watch outside. The barber had told me
+that he had shaved the beard from the president's face that night;
+therefore I was prepared, when I entered the rooms, to find him
+with a smooth face. When I apprehended him in the name of the people
+he drew a pistol and shot himself instantly. In a few minutes many
+officers and citizens were on the spot. I suppose you have been
+informed of the subsequent facts."
+
+Goodwin paused. Losada's agent maintained an attitude of waiting,
+as if he expected a continuance.
+
+"And now," went on the American, looking steadily into the eyes of
+the other man, and giving each word a deliberate emphasis, "you will
+oblige me by attending carefully to what I have to add. I saw no
+valise or receptacle of any kind, or any money belonging to the
+Republic of Anchuria. If President Miraflores decamped with any funds
+belonging to the treasury of this country, or to himself, or to any
+one else, I saw no trace of it in the house or elsewhere, at that time
+or at any other. Does that statement cover the ground of the inquiry
+you wished to make of me?"
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed, and described a fluent curve with his cigar.
+His duty was performed. Goodwin was not to be disputed. He was
+a loyal supporter of the government, and enjoyed the full confidence
+of the new president. His rectitude had been the capital that had
+brought him fortune in Anchuria, just as it had formed the lucrative
+"graft" of Mellinger, the secretary of Miraflores.
+
+"I thank you, ~Senor~ Goodwin, " said Falcon, "for speaking plainly.
+But, ~Senor~ Goodwin, I am instructed to pursue every clue that
+presents itself in this matter. There is one that I have not yet
+touched upon. Our friends in France, senor, have a saying, '~Cherchez
+la femme~,' when there is a mystery without a clue. But here we do
+not have to search. The woman who accompanied the late President
+in his flight must surely--"
+
+"I must interrupt you there," interposed Goodwin. "It is true that
+when I entered the hotel for the purpose of intercepting President
+Miraflores I found a lady there. I must beg of you to remember that
+that lady is now my wife. I speak for her as I do for myself. She
+knows nothing of the fate of the valise or of the money that you
+are seeking. You will say to his excellency that I guarantee her
+innocence. I do not need to add to you, Colonel Falcon, that I do
+not care to have her questioned or disturbed."
+
+Colonel Falcon bowed again.
+
+"~Por supuesto~, no!" he cried. And to indicate that the inquiry
+was ended he added: "And now, senor, let me beg of you to show me
+that sea view from your galeria of which you spoke. I am a lover
+of the sea."
+
+In the early evening Goodwin walked back to the town with his guest,
+leaving him at the corner of the Calle Grande. As he was returning
+homeward one "Beelzebub" Blythe, with the air of a courtier and
+the outward aspect of a scarecrow, pounced upon him hopefully from
+the door of a ~pulperia~.
+
+Blythe had been re-christened "Beelzebub" as an acknowledgement of
+the greatness of his fall. Once in some distant Paradise Lost, he had
+foregathered with the angels of the earth. But Fate had hurled him
+headlong down to the tropics, where flamed in his bosom a fire that
+was seldom quenched. In Coralio they called him a beach-comber; but
+he was, in reality, a categorical idealist who strove to anamorphosize
+the dull verities of life by the means of brandy and rum. As
+Beelzebub, himself, might have held in his clutch with unwitting
+tenacity his harp or crown during his tremendous fall, so his namesake
+had clung to his gold-rimmed eyeglasses as the only souvenir of his
+lost estate. These he wore with impressiveness and distinction while
+he combed beaches and extracted toll from his friends. By some
+mysterious means he kept his drink-reddened face always smoothly
+shaven. For the rest he sponged gracefully upon whomsoever he could
+for enough to keep him pretty drunk, and sheltered from the rains and
+night dews.
+
+"Hallo, Goodwin!" called the derelict, airily. "I was hoping I'd
+strike you. I wanted to see you particularly. Suppose we go where
+we can talk. Of course you know there's a chap down here looking up
+the money old Miraflores lost."
+
+"Yes," said Goodwin, "I've been talking with him. Let's go into
+Espada's place. I can spare you ten minutes."
+
+They went into the ~pulperia~ and sat at a little table upon stools
+with rawhide tops.
+
+"Have a drink?" said Goodwin.
+
+"They can't bring it too quickly," said Blythe. "I've been in
+a drought ever since morning. Hi!--~muchacho!--el aguardiente por
+aca~."
+
+"Now, what do you want to see me about?" asked Goodwin, when the
+drinks were before them.
+
+"Confound it, old man," drawled Blythe, "why do you spoil a golden
+moment like this with business? I wanted to see you--well, this
+has the preference." He gulped down his brandy, and gazed longingly
+into the empty glass.
+
+"Have another?" suggested Goodwin.
+
+"Between gentlemen," said the fallen angel, "I don't quite like
+your use of that word 'another.' It isn't quite delicate. But
+the concrete idea that the word represents is not displeasing."
+
+The glasses were refilled. Blythe sipped blissfully from his, as
+he began to enter the state of a true idealist.
+
+"I must trot along in a minute or two," hinted Goodwin. "Was there
+anything in particular?"
+
+Blythe did not reply at once.
+
+"Old Losada would make it a hot country," he remarked at length, "for
+the man who swiped that gripsack of treasury boodle, don't you think?"
+
+"Undoubtedly, he would," agreed Goodwin calmly, as he rose leisurely
+to his feet. "I'll be running over to the house, now old man. Mrs.
+Goodwin is alone. There was nothing important you had to say, was
+there?"
+
+"That's all," said Blythe. "Unless you wouldn't mind sending in
+another drink from the bar as you go out. Old Espada has closed my
+account to profit and loss. And pay for the lot, will you, like a
+good fellow?"
+
+"All right," said Goodwin. "~Buenas noches~."
+
+"Beezlebub" Blythe lingered over his cups, polishing his eyeglasses
+with a disreputable handkerchief.
+
+"I thought I could do it, but I couldn't," he muttered to himself
+after a time. "A gentleman can't blackmail the man that he drinks
+with."
+
+
+
+VIII
+
+The Admiral
+
+Spilled milk draws few tears from an Anchurian administration.
+Many are its lacteal sources; and the clocks' hands point forever
+to milking time. Even the rich cream skimmed from the treasury by
+the bewitched Miraflores did not cause the newly installed patriots
+to waste time in unprofitable regrets. The government philosophically
+set about supplying the deficiency by increasing the import duties
+and by "suggesting" to wealthy private citizens that contributions
+according to their means would be considered patriotic and in order.
+Prosperity was expected to attend the reign of Losada, the new
+president. The ousted office-holders and military favorites
+organized a new "Liberal" party, and began to lay their plans
+for a re-succession. Thus the game of Anchurian politics began, like
+a Chinese comedy, to unwind slowly its serial length. Here and there
+Mirth peeps for an instant from the wings and illumines the florid
+lines.
+
+A dozen quarts of champagne in conjunction with an informal sitting
+of the president and his cabinet led to the establishment of the navy
+and the appointment of Felipe Carrera as its admiral.
+
+Next to the champagne the credit of the appointment belongs to Don
+Sabas Placido, the newly confirmed Minister of War.
+
+The president had requested a convention of his cabinet for the
+discussion of questions politic and for the transaction of certain
+routine matters of state. The session had been signally tedious;
+the business and the wine prodigiously dry. A sudden, prankish humor
+of Don Sabas, impelling him to the deed, spiced the grave affairs
+of state with a whiff of agreeable playfulness. In the dilatory
+order of business had come a bulletin from the coast department
+of Orilla del Mar reporting the seizure by the custom-house officers
+at the town of Coralio of the sloop ~Estrella del Noche~ and her cargo
+of drygoods, patent medicines, granulated sugar and three-star brandy.
+Also six Martini rifles and a barrel of American whiskey. Caught
+in the act of smuggling, the sloop with its cargo was now, according
+to law, the property of the republic.
+
+The Collector of Customs, in making his report, departed from the
+conventional forms so far as to suggest that the confiscated vessel
+be converted to the use of the government. The prize was the first
+capture to the credit of the department in ten years. The collector
+took opportunity to pat his department on the back.
+
+It often happened that government officers required transportation
+from point to point along the coast, and means were usually lacking.
+Furthermore, the sloop could be manned by a loyal crew and employed
+as a coast guard to discourage the pernicious art of smuggling. The
+collector also ventured to nominate one to whom the charge of the boat
+could be safely intrusted--a young man of Coralio, Felipe Carrera--
+not, be it understood, one of extreme wisdom, but loyal and the best
+sailor along the coast.
+
+It was upon this hint that the Minister of War acted, executing a
+rare piece of drollery that so enlivened the tedium of the executive
+session.
+
+In the consultation of this small, maritime banana republic was
+a forgotten section that provided for the maintenance of a navy.
+This provision--with many other wiser ones--had lain inert since
+the establishment of the republic. Anchuria had no navy and had
+no use for one. It was characteristic of Don Sabasa man at once
+merry, learned, whimsical and audacious--that he should have disturbed
+the dust of this musty and sleeping statute to increase the humor
+of the world by so much as a smile from his indulgent colleagues.
+
+With delightful mock seriousness the Minister of War proposed the
+creation of a navy. He argued its need and the glories it might
+achieve with such gay and witty zeal that the travesty overcame with
+its humor even the swart dignity of President Losada himself.
+
+The champagne was bubbling trickily in the veins of the mercurial
+statesmen. It was not the custom of the grave governors of Anchuria
+to enliven their sessions with a beverage so apt to cast a veil
+of disparagement over sober affairs. The wine had been a thoughtful
+compliment tendered by the agent of the Vesuvius Fruit Company as
+a token of amicable relations--and certain consummated deals--between
+that company and the republic of Anchuria.
+
+The jest was carried to its end. A formidable, official document was
+prepared, encrusted with chromatic seals and jaunty with fluttering
+ribbons, bearing the florid signatures of state. This commission
+conferred upon el Senor Don Felipe Carrera the title of Flag Admiral
+of the Republic of Anchuria. Thus within the space of a few minutes
+and the dominion of a dozen "extra dry" the country took its place
+among the naval powers of the world, and Felipe Carrera became
+entitled to a salute of nineteen guns whenever he might enter port.
+
+The southern races are lacking in that particular kind of humor that
+finds entertainment in the defects and misfortunes bestowed by Nature.
+Owing to this defect in their constitution they are not moved to
+laughter (as are their northern brothers) by the spectacle of the
+deformed, the feeble-minded or the insane.
+
+Felipe Carrera was sent upon earth with but half his wits. Therefore,
+the people of Coralio called him "~El pobrecito loco~" the poor little
+crazed one"--saying that God had sent but half of him to earth,
+retaining the other half.
+
+A sombre youth, glowering, and speaking only at the rarest times,
+Felipe was but negatively "loco." On shore he generally refused all
+conversation. He seemed to know that he was badly handicapped on
+land, where so many kinds of understanding are needed; but on the
+water his one talent set him equal with most men. Few sailors whom
+God had carefully and completely made could handle a sailboat as well.
+Five points nearer the wind than the best of them he could sail his
+sloop. When the elements raged and set other men to cowering, the
+deficiencies of Felipe seemed of little importance. He was a perfect
+sailor, if an imperfect man. He owned no boat, but worked among the
+crews of the schooners and sloops that skimmed the coast, trading and
+freighting fruit out to the steamers where there was no harbor. It
+was through his famous skill and boldness on the sea, as well as for
+the pity felt for his mental imperfections, that he was recommended by
+the collector as a suitable custodian of the captured sloop.
+
+When the outcome of Don Sabas' little pleasantry arrived in the form
+of the imposing and preposterous commission, the collector smiled.
+He had not expected such prompt and overwhelming response to
+his recommendation. He despatched a ~muchacho~ at once to fetch
+the future admiral.
+
+The collector waited in his official quarters. His office was in
+the Calle Grande, and the sea breezes hummed through its windows all
+day. The collector, in white linen and canvas shoes, philandered with
+papers on an antique desk. A parrot, perched on a pen rack, seasoned
+the official tedium with a fire of choice Castilian imprecations.
+Two rooms opened into the Collector's. In one the clerical force of
+young men of variegated complexions transacted with glitter and parade
+their several duties. Through the open door of the other room could
+be seen a bronze babe, guiltless of clothing, that rollicked upon the
+floor. In a grass hammock a thin woman, tinted a pale lemon, played
+a guitar and swung contentedly in the breeze. Thus surrounded by
+the routine of his high duties and the visible tokens of agreeable
+domesticity, the collector's heart was further made happy by the power
+placed in his hands to brighten the fortunes of the "innocent" Felipe.
+
+Felipe came and stood before the collector. He was a lad of twenty,
+not ill-favored in looks, but with an expression of distant and
+pondering vacuity. He wore white cotton trousers, down the seams
+of which he had sewed red stripes with some vague aim at military
+decoration. A flimsy blue shirt fell open at his throat; his feet
+were bare; he held in his hand the cheapest of straw hats from the
+States.
+
+"Senor Carrera," said the collector, gravely, producing the showy
+commission, "I have sent for you at the president's bidding. This
+document that I present to you confers upon you the title of Admiral
+of this great republic, and gives you absolute command of the naval
+forces and fleet of our country. You may think, friend Felipe, that
+we have no navy--but yes! The sloop the ~Estrella del Noche~, that
+my brave men captured from the coast smugglers, is to be placed under
+your command. The boat is to be devoted to the services of your
+country. You will be ready at all times to convey officials of the
+government to points along the coast where they may be obliged to
+visit. You will also act as a coast-guard to prevent, as far as you
+may be able, the crime of smuggling. You will uphold the honor and
+prestige of your country at sea, and endeavor to place Anchuria among
+the proudest naval powers of the world. These are your instructions
+as the Minister of War desires me to convey them to you. ~Por Dios!~
+I do not know how all this is to be accomplished, for not one word
+did his letter contain in respect to a crew or to the expenses of this
+navy. Perhaps you are to provide a crew yourself, Senor Admiral--I do
+not know--but it is a very high honor that has descended upon you. I
+now hand you your commission. When you are ready for the boat I will
+give orders that she shall be made over into your charge. That is as
+far as my instructions go."
+
+Felipe took the commission that the collector handed to him. He gazed
+through the open window at the sea for a moment, with his customary
+expression of deep but vain pondering. Then he turned without having
+spoken a word, and walked swiftly away through the hot sand of the
+street.
+
+"~Pobrecito loco!~" sighed the collector; and the parrot on the pen
+racks screeched "Loco!loco!loco!"
+
+The next morning a strange procession filed through the streets
+to the collector's office. At its head was the admiral of the navy.
+Somewhere Felipe had raked together a pitiful semblance of a military
+uniform--a pair of red trousers, a dingy blue short jacket heavily
+ornamented with gold braid, and an old fatigue cap that must have been
+cast away by one of the British soldiers in Belize and brought away
+by Felipe on one of his coasting voyages. Buckled around his waist
+was an ancient ship's cutlass contributed to his equipment by Pedro
+Lafitte, the baker, who proudly asserted its inheritance from his
+ancestor, the illustrious buccaneer. At the admiral's heels tagged
+his newly shipped crew--three grinning, glossy, black Caribs, bare to
+the waist, the sand spurting in showers from the spring of their naked
+feet.
+
+Briefly and with dignity Felipe demanded his vessel of the collector.
+And now a fresh honor awaited him. The collector's wife, who played
+the guitar and read novels in the hammock all day, had more than
+a little romance in her placid, yellow bosom. She had found in
+an old book an engraving of a flag that purported to be the naval
+flag of Anchuria. Perhaps it had so been designed by the founders
+of the nation; but, as no navy had ever been established, oblivion
+had claimed the flag. Laboriously with her own hands she had made
+a flag after the pattern--a red cross upon a blue-and-white ground.
+he presented it to Felipe with these words: "Brave sailor, this flag
+is of your country. Be true, and defend it with your life. Go you
+with God."
+
+For the first time since his appointment the admiral showed a flicker
+of emotion. He took the silken emblem, and passed his hand reverently
+over its surface, "I am the admiral," he said to the collector's lady.
+Being on land he could bring himself to no more exuberant expression
+of sentiment. At sea with the flag at the masthead of his navy, some
+more eloquent exposition of feelings might be forthcoming.
+
+Abruptly the admiral departed with his crew. For the next three days
+they were busy giving the ~Estrella del Noche~ a new coat of white
+paint trimmed with blue. And then Felipe further adorned himself by
+fastening a handful of brilliant parrot's plumes in his cap. Again
+he tramped with his faithful crew to the collector's office and
+formally notified him that the sloop's name had been changed to ~El
+Nacional~.
+
+During the next few months the navy had its troubles. Even an admiral
+is perplexed to know what to do without any orders. But none came.
+Neither did any salaries. ~El Nacional~ swung idly at anchor.
+
+When Felipe's little store of money was exhausted he went to the
+collector and raised the question of finances.
+
+"Salaries!" exclaimed the collector, with hands raised; "~Valgame
+Dios~! not one ~centavo~ of my own pay have I received for the last
+seven months. The pay of an admiral, do you ask? ~Quien sabe~?
+Should it be less than three thousand ~pesos~? ~Mira~! you will see
+a revolution in this country very soon. A good sign of it is when
+the government calls all the time for ~pesos, pesos, pesos~, and pays
+none out."
+
+Felipe left the collector's office with a look almost of content
+on his sombre face. A revolution would mean fighting, and then
+the government would need his services. It was rather humiliating
+to be an admiral without anything to do, and have a hungry crew at your
+heels begging for ~reales~ to buy plantains and tobacco with.
+
+When he returned to where his happy-go-lucky Caribs were waiting
+they sprang up and saluted, as he had drilled them to do. "Come,
+~muchachos~," said the admiral; "it seems that the government is poor.
+It has no money to give us. We will earn what we need to live upon.
+Thus will we serve our country. Soon"--his heavy eyes almost lighted
+up--"it may gladly call upon us for help."
+
+Thereafter ~El Nacional~ turned out with the other coast craft and
+became a wage-earner. She worked with the lighters freighting bananas
+and oranges out to the fruit steamers that could not approach nearer
+than a mile from the shore. Surely a self-supporting navy deserves
+red letters in the budget of any nation.
+
+After earning enough at freighting to keep himself and his crew
+in provisions for a week Felipe would anchor the navy and hang about
+the little telegraph office, looking like one of the chorus of an
+insolvent comic opera troupe besieging the manager's den. A hope for
+orders from the capital was always in his heart. That his services
+as admiral had never been called into requirement hurt his pride and
+patriotism. At every call he would inquire, gravely and expectantly,
+for despatches. The operator would pretend to make a search, and
+then reply:
+
+"Not yet, it seems, ~Senor el Almirante--poco tiempo~!"
+
+Outside in the shade of the lime-trees the crew chewed sugar cane
+or slumbered, well content to serve a country that was contented
+with so little service.
+
+One day in the early summer the revolution predicted by the collector
+flamed out suddenly. It had long been smoldering. At the first note
+of alarm the admiral of the navy force and fleet made all sail for
+a larger port on the coast of a neighboring republic, where he traded
+a hastily collected cargo of fruit for its value in cartridges for the
+five Martini rifles, the only guns that the navy could boast. Then
+to the telegraph office sped the admiral. Sprawling in his favorite
+corner, in his fast-decaying uniform, with his prodigious sabre
+distributed between his red legs, he waited for the long-delayed,
+but now soon expected, orders.
+
+"Not yet, ~Senor el Almirante~" the telegraph clerk would call to him
+--"~poco tiempo~!"
+
+At the answer the admiral would plump himself down with a great
+rattling of scabbard to await the infrequent tick of the little
+instrument on the table.
+
+"They will come," would be his unshaken reply; "I am the admiral."
+
+
+
+IX
+
+The Flag Paramount
+
+At the head of the insurgent party appeared that Hector and learned
+Theban of the southern republics, Don Sabas Placido. A traveller,
+a soldier, a poet, a scientist, a statesman and a connoisseur--the
+wonder was that he could content himself with the petty, remote life
+of his native country.
+
+"It is a whim of Placido's," said a friend who knew him well,
+"to take up political intrigue. It is not otherwise than as if he
+had come upon a new tempo in music, a new bacillus in the air, a new
+scent, or rhyme, or explosive. He will squeeze this revolution dry
+of sensations, and a week afterward will forget it, skimming the seas
+of the world in his brigantine to add to his already world-famous
+collections. Collections of what? ~Por Dios~! of everything from
+postage stamps to prehistoric stone idols."
+
+But, for a mere dilettante, the aesthetic Placido seemed to be
+creating a lively row. The people admired him; they were fascinated
+by his brilliancy and flattered by his taking an interest in so small
+a thing as his native country. They rallied to the call of his
+lieutenants in the capital, where (somewhat contrary to arrangements)
+the army remained faithful to the government. There was also lively
+skirmishing in the coast towns. It was rumored that the revolution
+was aided by the Vesuvius Fruit Company, the power that forever stood
+with chiding smile and uplifted finger to keep Anchuria in the class
+of good children. Two of its steamers, the ~Traveler~ and the
+~Salvador~, were known to have conveyed insurgent troops from point
+to point along the coast.
+
+As yet there had been no actual uprising in Coralio. Military law
+prevailed, and the ferment was bottled for the time. And then came
+the word that everywhere the revolutionists were encountering defeat.
+In the capital the president's forces triumphed; and there was a rumor
+that the leaders of the revolt had been forced to fly, hotly pursued.
+
+In the little telegraph office at Coralio there was always
+a gathering of officials and loyal citizens, awaiting news from
+the seat of government. One morning the telegraph key began clicking,
+and presently the operator called, loudly: "One telegram for
+~el Almirante~, Don Senor Felipe Carrera!"
+
+There was a shuffling sound, a great rattling of tin scabbard, and
+the admiral, prompt at his spot of waiting, leaped across the room
+to receive it.
+
+The message was handed to him. Slowly spelling it out, he found it
+to be his first official order--thus running:
+
+ "Proceed immediately with your vessel to mouth of Rio Ruiz;
+ transport beef and provisions to barracks at Alforan.
+ ~Martinez, General.~"
+
+Small glory, to be sure, in this, his country's first call. But
+it had called, and joy surged in the admiral's breast. He drew his
+cutlass belt to another buckle hole, roused his dozing crew, and in
+a quarter of an hour ~El Nacional~ was tacking swiftly down coast in
+a stiff landward breeze.
+
+The Rio Ruiz is a small river, emptying into the sea ten miles below
+Coralio. That portion of the coast is wild and solitary. Through
+a gorge in the Cordilleras rushes the Rio Ruiz, cold and bubbling,
+to glide at last, with breadth and leisure, through an alluvial morass
+into the sea.
+
+In two hours ~El Nacional~ entered the river's mouth. The banks
+were crowded with a disposition of formidable trees. The sumptuous
+undergrowth of the tropics overflowed the land, and drowned itself
+in the fallow waters.
+
+Silently the sloop entered there, and met a deeper silence. Brilliant
+with greens and ochres and floral, scarlets, the umbrageous mouth
+of the Rio Ruiz furnished no sound or movement save of the sea-going
+water as it purled against the prow of the vessel. Small chance there
+seemed of wresting beef or provisions from that empty solitude.
+
+The admiral decided to cast anchor, and, at the chain's rattle,
+the forest was stimulated to instant and resounding uproar. The mouth
+of the Rio Ruiz had only been taking a morning nap. Parrots and
+baboons screeched and barked in the trees; a whirring and a hissing
+and a booming marked the awakening of animal life; a dark blue bulk
+was visible for an instant, as a startled tapir fought his way through
+the vines.
+
+The navy, under orders, hung in the mouth of the little river for
+hours. The crew served the dinner of shark's fin soup, plantains,
+crab gumbo and sour wine. The admiral, with a three-foot telescope,
+closely scanned the impervious foliage fifty yards away.
+
+It was nearly sunset when a reverberating "hal-lo-o-o!" came from
+the forest to their left. It was answered; and three men, mounted
+upon mules, crashed through the tropic tangle to within a dozen yards
+of the river's bank. There they dismounted; and one, unbuckling
+his belt, struck each mule a violent blow with his sword scabbard,
+so that they, with a fling of heels, dashed back again into
+the forest.
+
+Those were strange-looking men to be conveying beef and provisions.
+One was a large and exceedingly active man, of striking presence. He
+was of the purest Spanish type, with curling, gray-besprinkled, dark
+hair, blue, sparkling eyes, and the pronounced air of a ~caballero
+grande~. The other two were small, brown-faced men, wearing white
+military uniforms, high riding boots and swords. The clothes of all
+were drenched, bespattered and rent by the thicket. Some stress of
+circumstance must have driven them, ~diable a quatre~, through flood,
+mire and jungle.
+
+"~O-he! Senor Almirante~," called the large man. "Send to us your
+boat."
+
+The dory was lowered, and Felipe, with one of the Caribs, rowed toward
+the left bank.
+
+The large man stood near the water's brink, waist deep in the curling
+vines. As he gazed upon the scarecrow figure in the stern of the dory
+a sprightly interest beamed upon his mobile face.
+
+Months of wageless and thankless service had dimmed the admiral's
+splendor. His red trousers were patched and ragged. Most of the
+bright buttons and yellow braid were gone from his jacket. The visor
+of his cap was torn, and depended almost to his eyes. The admiral's
+feet were bare.
+
+"Dear Admiral," cried the large man, and his voice was like a blast
+from a horn, "I kiss your hands. I knew we could build upon your
+fidelity. You had our despatch--from General Martinez. A little
+nearer with your boat, dear Admiral. Upon these devils of shifting
+vines we stand with the smallest security."
+
+Felipe regarded him with a stolid face.
+
+"Provisions and beef for the barracks at Alforan," he quoted.
+
+"No fault of the butchers, ~Almirante mio~, that the beef awaits you
+not. But you are come in time to save the cattle. Get us aboard your
+vessel, senor, at once. You first, ~caballeros--a priesa!~ Come back
+for me. The boat is too small."
+
+The dory conveyed the two officers to the sloop, and returned for
+the large man.
+
+"Have you so gross a thing as food, good Admiral?" he cried, when
+aboard. "And, perhaps, coffee? Beef and provisions! ~Nombre de
+Dios!~ a little longer and we could have eaten one of those mules that
+you, Colonel Rafael, saluted so feelingly with your sword scabbard at
+parting. Let us have food; and then we will sail--for the barracks
+at Alforan--no?"
+
+The Caribs prepared a meal, to which the three passengers of ~El
+Nacional~ set themselves with famished delight. About sunset, as was
+its custom, the breeze veered and swept back from the mountains, cool
+and steady, bringing a taste of the stagnant lagoons and mangrove
+swamps that guttered the lowlands. The mainsail of the sloop was
+hoisted and swelled to it, and at that moment they heard shouts and
+a waxing clamor from the bosky profundities of the shore.
+
+"The butchers, my dear Admiral," said the large man, smiling, "too
+late for the slaughter."
+
+Further than his orders to his crew, the admiral was saying nothing.
+The topsail and jib were spread, and the sloop elided out of the
+estuary. The large man and his companions had bestowed themselves
+with what comfort they could about the bare deck. Belike, the thing
+big in their minds had been their departure from that critical shore;
+and now that the hazard was so far reduced their thoughts were loosed
+to the consideration of further deliverance. But when they saw the
+sloop turn and fly up coast again they relaxed, satisfied with the
+course the admiral had taken.
+
+The large man sat at ease, his spirited blue eye engaged in
+the contemplation of the navy's commander. He was trying to estimate
+this sombre and fantastic lad, whose impenetrable stolidity puzzled
+him. Himself a fugitive, his life sought, and chafing under the smart
+of defeat and failure, it was characteristic of him to transfer
+instantly his interest to the study of a thing new to him. It was
+like him, too, to have conceived and risked all upon this last
+desperate and madcap scheme--this message to a poor, crazed ~fanatico~
+cruising about with his grotesque uniform and his farcical title.
+But his companions had been at their wits' end; escape had seemed
+incredible; and now he was pleased with the success of the plan they
+had called crack-brained and precarious.
+
+The brief, tropic twilight seemed to slide swiftly into the pearly
+splendor of a moonlit night. And now the lights of Coralio appeared,
+distributed against the darkening shore to their right. The admiral
+stood, silent, at the tiller; the Caribs, like black panthers, held
+the sheets, leaping noiselessly at his short commands. The three
+passengers were watching intently the sea before them, and when at
+length they came in sight of the bulk of a steamer lying a mile out
+from the town, with her lights radiating deep into the water, they
+held a sudden voluble and close-headed converse. The sloop was
+speeding as if to strike midway between ship and shore.
+
+The large man suddenly separated from his companions and approached
+the scarecrow at the helm.
+
+"My dear Admiral," he said, "the government has been exceedingly
+remiss. I feel all the shame for it that only its ignorance of your
+devoted service has prevented it from sustaining. An inexcusable
+oversight has been made. A vessel, a uniform and a crew worthy
+of your fidelity shall be furnished you. But just now, dear Admiral,
+there is business of moment afoot. The steamer lying there is the
+~Salvador~. I and my friends desire to be conveyed to her, where we
+are sent on the government's business. Do us the favor to shape your
+course accordingly."
+
+Without replying, the admiral gave a sharp command, and put the tiller
+hard to port. ~El Nacional~ swerved, and headed straight as an
+arrow's course for the shore.
+
+"Do me the favor," said the large man, a trifle restively,
+"to acknowledge, at least, that you catch the sound of my words."
+It was possible that the fellow might be lacking in senses as well
+as intellect.
+
+The admiral emitted a croaking, harsh laugh, and spake.
+
+"They will stand you," he said, "with your face to a wall and shoot
+you dead. That is the way they kill traitors. I knew you when you
+stepped into my boat. I have seen your picture in a book. You are
+Sabas Placido, traitor to your country. With your face to a wall.
+So, you will die. I am the admiral, and I will take you to them.
+With your face to a wall. Yes."
+
+Don Sabas half turned and waved his hand, with a ringing laugh,
+toward his fellow fugitives. "To you, ~caballeros~, I have related
+the history of that session when we issued that 0! so ridiculous
+commission. Of a truth our jest has been turned against us. Behold
+the Frankenstein's monster we have created!"
+
+Don Sabas glanced toward the shore. The lights of Coralio were
+drawing near. He could see the beach, the warehouse of the ~Bodega
+Nacional~, the long, low ~cuartel~ occupied by the soldiers, and
+behind that, gleaming in the moonlight, a stretch of high adobe wall.
+He had seen men stood with their faces to that wall and shot dead.
+
+Again he addressed the extravagant figure at the helm.
+
+"It is true," he said, "that I am fleeing the country. But, receive
+the assurance that I care very little for that. Courts and camps
+everywhere are open to Sabas Placido. ~Vaya!~ what is this molehill
+of a republic--this pig's head of a country--to a man like me? I am
+a ~paisano~ of everywhere. In Rome, in London, in Paris, in Vienna,
+you will hear them say: 'Welcome back, Don Sabas.' Come!--~tonto~--
+baboon of a boy--admiral, whatever you call yourself, turn your boat.
+Put us on board the ~Salvador~, and here is your pay--five hundred
+pesos in money of the ~Estados Unidos~--more than your lying
+government will pay you in twenty years."
+
+Don Sabas pressed a plump purse against the youth's hand. The admiral
+gave no heed to the words or the movement. Braced against the helm,
+he was holding the sloop dead on her shoreward course. His dull face
+was lit almost to intelligence by some inward conceit that seemed to
+afford him joy, and found utterance in another parrot-like cackle.
+
+"That is why they do it," he said--"so that you will not see the guns.
+They fire--boom!--and you fall dead. With your face to the wall.
+Yes."
+
+The admiral called a sudden order to his crew. The lithe, silent
+Caribs made fast the sheets they held, and slipped down the hatchway
+into the hold of the sloop. When the last one had disappeared, Don
+Sabas, like a big, brown leopard, leaped forward, closed and fastened
+the hatch and stood, smiling.
+
+"No rifles, if you please, dear admiral," he said. "It was a whimsey
+of mine once to compile a dictionary of the Carib ~lengua~. So,
+I understood your order. Perhaps now you will--"
+
+He cut short his words, for he heard the dull "swish" of iron scraping
+along tin. The admiral had drawn the cutlass of Pedro Lafitte,
+and was darting upon him. The blade descended, and it was only by
+a display of surprising agility that the large man escaped, with only
+a bruised shoulder, the glancing weapon. He was drawing his pistol
+as he sprang, and the next instant he shot the admiral down.
+
+Don Sabas stooped over him, and rose again.
+
+"In the heart," he said briefly. "~Senores~, the navy is abolished."
+
+Colonel Rafael sprang to the helm, and the other officer hastened to
+loose the mainsail sheets. The boom swung round; ~El Nacional~ veered
+and began to tack industriously for the ~Salvador~.
+
+"Strike that flag, senor," called Colonel Rafael. "Our friends on
+the steamer will wonder why we are sailing under it."
+
+"Well said," cried Don Sabas. Advancing to the mast he lowered the
+flag to the deck, where lay its too loyal supporter. Thus ended the
+Minister of War's little piece of after-dinner drollery, and by the
+same hand that began it.
+
+Suddenly Don Sabas gave a great cry of joy, and ran down the slanting
+deck to the side of Colonel Rafael. Across his arm he carried the
+flag of the extinguished navy.
+
+"~Mire! mire! senor. Ah, ~Dios!~ Already can I hear that great bear
+of an Oestreicher~ shout, ~'Du hast mein herz gebrochen!' Mire!~
+Of my friend, Herr Grunitz, of Vienna, you have heard me relate.
+That man has travelled to Ceylon for an orchid--to Patagonia for
+a headdress --to Benares for a slipper--to Mozambique for a spearhead
+to add to his famous collections. Thou knowest, also, ~amigo~ Rafael,
+that I have been a gatherer of curios. My collection of battle flags
+of the world's navies was the most complete in existence until last
+year. Then Herr Grunitz secured two, 0! such rare specimens. One
+of a Barberry state, and one of the Makarooroos, a tribe on the west
+coast of Africa. I have not those, but they can be procured. But
+this flag, senor--do you know what it is? Name of God! do you know?
+See that red cross upon the blue and white ground! You never saw
+it before? ~Seguramente no~. It is the naval flag of your country.
+~Mire!~ This rotten tub we stand upon is its navy--that dead cockatoo
+lying there was its commander--that stroke of cutlass and single
+pistol shot a sea battle. All a piece of absurd foolery, I grant you
+--but authentic. There has never been another flag like this, and
+there never will be another. No. It is unique in the whole world.
+Yes. Think of what that means to a collector of flags! Do you know,
+~Coronel mio~, how many golden crowns Herr Grunitz would give for this
+flag? Ten thousand, likely. Well, a hundred thousand would not buy
+it. Beautiful flag! Only flag! Little devil of a most heaven-born
+flag! ~O'he!~ old grumbler beyond the ocean. Wait till Don Sabas
+comes again to the Konigin Strasse. He will let you kneel and touch
+the folds of it with one finger. ~O-he!~ old spectacled ransacker
+of the world!"
+
+Forgotten was the impotent revolution, the danger, the loss, the gall
+of defeat. Possessed solely by the inordinate and unparalleled
+passion of the collector, he strode up and down the little deck,
+clasping to his breast with one hand the paragon of a flag. He
+snapped his fingers triumphantly toward the east. He shouted the
+paean to his prize in trumpet tones, as though he would make old
+Grunitz hear in his musty den beyond the sea.
+
+They were waiting, on the ~Salvador~, to welcome them. The sloop came
+close alongside the steamer where her sides were sliced almost to the
+lower deck for the loading of fruit. The sailors of the ~Salvador~
+grappled and held her there.
+
+Captain McLeod leaned over the side.
+
+"Well, ~senor~, the jig is up, I'm told."
+
+"The jig is up?" Don Sabas looked perplexed for a moment. "That
+revolution--ah, yes!" With a shrug of his shoulders he dismissed
+the matter.
+
+The captain learned of the escape and the imprisoned crew.
+
+"Caribs!" he said; "no harm in them." He slipped down into the sloop
+and kicked loose the hasp of the hatch. The black fellows came
+tumbling up, sweating but grinning.
+
+"Hey! black boys!" said the captain, in a dialect of his own; "you
+sabe, catchy boat and vamos back same place quick."
+
+They saw him point to themselves, the sloop and Coralio. "Yas, yas!"
+they cried, with broader grins and many nods.
+
+The four--Don Sabas, the two officers and the captain--moved to quit
+the sloop. Don Sabas lagged a little behind, looking at the still
+form of the late admiral, sprawled in his paltry trappings.
+
+"~Pobrecito loco~," he said softly.
+
+He was a brilliant cosmopolite and a ~cognoscente~ of high rank;
+but, after all, he was of the same race and blood and instinct as
+this people. Even as the simple ~paisanos~ of Coralio had said it,
+so said Don Sabas. Without a smile, he looked, and said, "The poor
+little crazed one!"
+
+Stooping he raised the limp shoulders, drew the priceless and
+induplicable flag under them and over the breast, pinning it there
+with the diamond star of the Order of San Carlos that he took from
+the collar of his own coat.
+
+He followed after the others, and stood with them upon the deck of
+the ~Salvador~. The sailors that steadied ~El Nacional~ shoved her
+off. The jabbering Caribs hauled away at the rigging; the sloop
+headed for the shore.
+
+And Herr Grunitz's collection of naval flags was still the finest
+in the world.
+
+
+
+X
+
+The Shamrock and the Palm
+
+One night when there was no breeze, and Coralio seemed closer than
+ever to the gratings of Avernus, five men were grouped about the door
+of the photograph establishment of Keogh and Clancy. Thus, in all
+the scorched and exotic places of the earth, Caucasians meet when
+the day's work is done to preserve the fulness of their heritage
+by the aspersion of alien things.
+
+Johnny Atwood lay stretched upon the grass in the undress uniform of
+a Carib, and prated feebly of cool water to be had in the cucumber-
+wood pumps of Dalesburg. Doctor Gregg, through the prestige of
+his whiskers and as a bribe against the relation of his imminent
+professional tales, was conceded the hammock that was swung between
+the door jamb and a calabash-tree. Keogh had moved out upon the grass
+a little table that held the instrument for burnishing completed
+photographs. He was the only busy one of the group. Industriously
+from between the cylinders of the burnisher rolled the finished
+depictments of Coralio's citizens. Blanchard, the French mining
+engineer, in his cool linen viewed the smoke of his cigarette through
+his calm glasses, impervious to the heat. Clancy sat on the steps,
+smoking his short pipe. His mood was the gossip's; the others were
+reduced, by the humidity, to the state of disability desirable in
+an audience.
+
+Clancy was an American with an Irish diathesis and cosmopolitan
+proclivities. Many businesses had claimed him, but not for long.
+The roadster's blood was in his veins. The voice of the tintype was
+but one of the many callings that had wooed him upon so many roads.
+Sometimes he could be persuaded to oral construction of his voyages
+into the informal and egregious. Tonight there were symptoms of
+divulgement in him.
+
+"'Tis elegant weather for filibustering'," he volunteered. "It
+reminds me of the time I struggled to liberate a nation from the
+poisonous breath of a tyrant's clutch. 'Twas hard work. 'Tis
+straining to the back and makes corns on the hands."
+
+"I didn't know you had ever lent your sword to an oppressed people,"
+murmured Atwood, from the grass.
+
+"I did," said Clancy; "and they turned it into a plowshare."
+
+"What country was so fortunate as to secure your aid?" airily inquired
+Blanchard.
+
+"Where's Kamchatka?" asked Clancy, with seeming irrelevance.
+
+"Why, off Siberia somewhere in the Arctic regions," somebody answered,
+doubtfully.
+
+"I thought that was the cold one," said Clancy, with a satisfied nod.
+"I'm always gettin' the two names mixed. 'Twas Guatemala, then--the
+hot one--I've been filibusterin' with. Ye'll find that country on
+the map. 'Tis in the district known as the tropics. By the foresight
+of Providence, it lies on the coast so the geography men could run the
+names of the towns off into the water. They're an inch long, small
+type, composed of Spanish dialects, and, 'tis my opinion, of the same
+system of syntax that blew up the ~Maine~. Yes, 'twas that country
+I sailed against, single-handed, and endeavored to liberate it from
+a tyrannical government with a single-barrelled pickaxe, unloaded
+at that. Ye don't understand, of course. 'Tis a statement demandin'
+elucidation and apologies.
+
+"'Twas in New Orleans one morning about the first ofJune; I was
+standing down on the wharf, looking about at the ships in the river.
+There was a little steamer moored right opposite me that seemed about
+ready to sail. The funnels of it were throwing out smoke, and a gang
+of roustabouts were carrying aboard a pile of boxes that was stacked
+up on the wharf. The boxes were about two feet square, and something
+like four feet long, and they seemed to be pretty heavy.
+
+"I walked over, careless, to the stack of boxes. I saw one of them
+had been broken in handlin'. 'Twas curiosity made me pull up
+the loose top and look inside. The box was packed full of Winchester
+rifles. 'So, so,' says I to myself; 'somebody's gettin' a twist
+on the neutrality laws. Somebody's aidin' with munitions of war.
+I wonder where the popguns are goin'?'
+
+"I heard somebody cough, and I turned around. There stood a little,
+round, fat man with a brown face and white clothes, a first-class-
+looking little man, with a four-karat diamond on his finger and
+his eye full of interrogations and respects. I judged he was a kind
+of foreigner--may be from Russia or Japan or the archipelagoes.
+
+"'Hist!' says the round man, full of concealments and confidences.
+'Will the senor respect the discoveryments he has made, that the mans
+on the ship shall not be acquaint? The senor will be a gentleman
+that shall not expose one thing that by accident occur.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I--for I judged him to be a kind of Frenchman--
+'receive my most exasperated assurances that your secret is safe with
+James Clancy. Furthermore, I will go so far as to remark, Veev la
+Liberty--veev it good and strong. Whenever you hear of a Clancy
+obstructin' the abolishment of existin' governments you may notify
+me by return mail.'
+
+"'The senor is good,' says the dark, fat man, smilin' under his black
+mustache. 'Wish you to come aboard my ship and drink of wine a glass.'
+
+"Bein' a Clancy, in two minutes me and the foreigner man were seated
+at a table in the cabin of the steamer, with a bottle between us. I
+could hear the heavy boxes bein' dumped into the hold. I judged that
+cargo must consist of at least 2,000 Winchesters. Me and the brown
+man drank the bottle of stuff, and he called the steward to bring
+another. When you amalgamate a Clancy with the contents of a bottle
+you practically instigate secession. I had heard a good deal about
+these revolutions in them tropical localities, and I begun to want
+a hand in it.
+
+"'You goin' to stir things up in your country, ain't you, monseer?'
+says I, with a wink to let him know I was on.
+
+"'Yes, yes,' said the little man, pounding his fist on the table.
+'A change of the greatest will occur. Too long have the people been
+oppressed with the promises and the never-to-happen things to become.
+The great work it shall be carry on. Yes. Our forces shall in the
+capital city strike of the soonest. ~Carrambos!~'
+
+"'~Carrambos~ is the word,' says I, beginning to invest myself with
+enthusiasm and more wine, 'likewise veeva, as I said before. May the
+shamrock of old--I mean the banana-vine or the pie-plant, or whatever
+the imperial emblem may be of your down-trodden country, wave
+forever.'
+
+"'A thousand thank-yous,' says the round man, 'for your emission of
+amicable utterances. What our cause needs of the very most is mans
+who will the work do, to lift it along. Oh, for one thousands strong,
+good mans to aid the General De Vega that he shall to his country
+bring those success and glory! It is hard--oh, so hard to find good
+mans to help in the work.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I, leanin' over the table and graspin' his hand,
+I don't know where your country is, but me heart bleeds for it. The
+heart of a Clancy was never deaf to the sight of an oppressed people.
+The family is filibusterers by birth, and foreigners by trade. If you
+can use James Clancy's arms and his blood in denuding your shores of
+the tyrant's yoke they're yours to command.'
+
+"General De Vega was overcome with joy to confiscate my condolence
+of his conspiracies and predicaments. He tried to embrace me across
+the table, but his fatness, and the wine that had been in the bottles,
+prevented. Thus was I welcomed into the ranks of filibustery. Then
+the general man told me his country had the name of Guatemala, and was
+the greatest nation laved by any ocean whatever anywhere. He looked
+at me with tears in his eyes, and from time to time he would emit the
+remark, 'Ah! big, strong, brave mans! That is what my country need.'
+
+"General De Vega, as was the name by which he denounced himself,
+brought out a document for me to sign, which I did, makin' a fine
+flourish and curlycue with the tail of the 'y.'
+
+"'Your passage-money,' says the general, business-like, 'shall from
+your pay be deduct.'
+
+"''Twill not,' says I, haughty. I'll pay my own passage.' A hundred
+and eighty dollars I had in my inside pocket, and 'twas no common
+filibuster I was goin' to be, filibusterin' for me board and clothes.
+
+"The steamer was to sail in two hours, and I went ashore to get some
+things together I'd need. When I came aboard I showed the general
+with pride the outfit. 'Twas a fine Chinchilla overcoat, Arctic
+overshoes, fur cap and earmuffs, with elegant fleece-lined gloves
+and woollen muffler.
+
+"~'Carrambos!~ says the little general. 'What clothes are these that
+shall go to the tropic?' And then the little spalpeen laughs, and he
+calls the captain, and the captain calls the purser, and they pipe up
+the chief engineer, and the whole gang leans against the cabin and
+laughs at Clancy's wardrobe for Guatemala.
+
+"I reflects a bit, serious, and asks the general again to denominate
+the terms by which his country is called. He tells me, and I see then
+that 'twas the t'other one, Kamchatka, I had in mind. Since then I've
+had difficulty in separatin' the two nations in name, climate and
+geographic disposition.
+
+"I paid my passage--twenty-four dollars, first cabin--and ate at
+table with the officer crowd. Down on the lower deck was a gang
+of second-class passengers, about forty of them, seemin' to be Dagoes
+and the like. I wondered what so many of them were goin' along for.
+
+"Well, then, in three days we sailed alongside that Guatemala. 'Twas
+a blue country, and not yellow as 'tis miscolored on the map. We
+landed at a town on the coast, where a train of cars was waitin' for
+us on a dinky little railroad. The boxes on the steamer were brought
+ashore and loaded on the cars. The gang of Dagoes got aboard, too,
+the general and me in the front car. Yes, me and General De Vega
+headed the revolution, as it pulled out of the seaport town. That
+train travelled about as fast as a policeman goin' to a riot. It
+penetrated the most conspicuous lot of fuzzy scenery ever seen outside
+a geography. We run some forty miles in seven hours, and the train
+stopped. There was no more railroad. 'Twas a sort of camp in a damp
+gorge full of wildness and melancholies. They was grading and
+choppin' out the forests ahead to continue the road. 'Here,' says
+I to myself, 'is the romantic haunt of the revolutionists. Here will
+Clancy, by the virtue that is in a superior race and the inculcation
+of Fenian tactics, strike a tremendous blow for liberty.'
+
+"They unloaded the boxes from the train and begun to knock the tops
+off. From the first one that was open I saw General De Vega take the
+Winchester rifles and pass them around to a squad of morbid soldiery.
+The other boxes was opened next, and, believe me or not, divil another
+gun was to be seen. Every other box in the load was full of pickaxes
+and spades.
+
+"And then--sorrow be upon them tropics--the proud Clancy and
+the dishonored Dagoes, each one of them, had to shoulder a pick or
+a spade, and march away to work on that dirty little railroad. Yes;
+'twas that the Dagoes shipped for, and 'twas that the filibusterin'
+Clancy signed for, though unbeknownst to himself at the time. In
+after days I found out about it. It seems 'twas hard to get hands
+to work on that road. The intelligent natives of the country was
+too lazy to work. Indeed, the saints know, 'twas unnecessary. By
+stretchin' out one hand, they could seize the most delicate and costly
+fruits of the earth, and, by stretchin' out the other, they could
+sleep for days at a time without hearin' a seven o'clock whistle
+or the footsteps of the rent man upon the stairs. So, regular, the
+steamers travelled to the United States to seduce labor. Usually the
+imported spade-slingers died in two or three months from eatin' the
+over-ripe water and breathing the violent tropical scenery. Wherefore
+they made them sign contracts for a year, when they hired them, and
+put an armed guard over the poor devils to keep them from runnin'
+away.
+
+"'Twas thus I was double-crossed by the tropics through a family
+failing of goin' out of the way to hunt disturbances.
+
+"They gave me a pick, and I took it, meditating an insurrection on
+the spot; but there was the guards handling the Winchesters careless,
+and I come to the conclusion that discretion was the best part of
+filibusterin'. There was about a hundred of us in the gang starting
+out to work, and the word was given to move. I steps out of the ranks
+and goes up to that General De Vega man, who was smokin' a cigar and
+gazin' upon the scene with satisfactions and glory. He smiles at me
+polite and devilish. 'Plenty work,' says he, 'for big, strong mans
+in Guatemala. Yes. Thirty dollars in the month. Good pay. Ah, yes.
+You strong, brave man. Bimeby we push those railroad in the capital
+very quick. They want you go work now. ~Adios~, strong mans.'
+
+"'Monseer,' says I, lingerin', 'will you tell a poor little Irishman
+this: When I set foot on your cockroachy steamer, and breathed
+liberal and revolutionary sentiments into your sour wine, did you
+think I was conspirin' to sling a pick on your contemptuous little
+railroad? And when you answered me with patriotic recitations,
+humping up the star-spangled cause of liberty, did you have
+meditations of reducin' me to the ranks of the stump-grubbin' Dagoes
+in the chain-gangs of your vile and grovelin' country?'
+
+'The general man expanded his rotundity and laughed considerable.
+Yes, he laughed very long and loud, and I, Clancy, stood and waited.
+
+"'Comical mans!' he shouts, at last. 'So you will kill me from the
+laughing. Yes; it is hard to find the brave, strong mans to aid my
+country. Revolutions? Did I speak of r-r-revolutions? Not one
+word. I say, big, strong man is need in Guatemala. So. The mistake
+is of you. You have looked in those one box containing those gun
+for the guard. You think all boxes is contain gun? No.
+
+"'There is not war in Guatemala. But work? Yes. Good. Thirty dollar
+in the month. You shall shoulder one pickaxe, senor, and dig for
+the liberty and prosperity of Guatemala. Off to your work. The guard
+waits for you.'
+
+"'Little, fat, poodle dog of a brown man,' says I, quiet, but full of
+indignations and discomforts, 'things shall happen to you. Maybe not
+right away, but as soon as J. Clancy can formulate somethin' in the
+way of repartee.'
+
+"The boss of the gang orders us to work. I tramps off with the
+Dagoes, and I hears the distinguished patriot and kidnapper laughin'
+hearty as we go.
+
+"Tis a sorrowful fact, for eight weeks I built railroads for that
+misbehavin' country. I filibustered twelve hours a day with a heavy
+pick and a spade, choppin' away the luxurious landscape that grew
+upon the right of way. We worked in swamps that smelled like there
+was a leak in the gas mains, trampin' down a fine assortment of
+the most expensive hothouse plants and vegetables. The scene was
+tropical beyond the wildest imagination of the geography man. The
+trees was all sky-scrapers; the underbrush was full of needles and
+pins; there was monkeys jumpin' around and crocodiles and pink-tailed
+mockin'-birds, and ye stood knee-deep in the rotten water and grabbled
+roots for the liberation of Guatemala. Of nights we would build
+smudges in camp to discourage the mosquitoes, and sit in the smoke,
+with the guards pacin' all around us. There was two hundred men
+working on the road--mostly Dagoes, nigger-men, Spanish-men and
+Swedes. Three or four were Irish.
+
+"One old man named Halloran--a man of Hibernian entitlements and
+discretions, explained it to me. He had been working on the road
+a year. Most of them died in less than six months. He was dried up
+to gristle and bone, and shook with chills every third night. "'When
+you first come,' says he, 'ye think ye'll leave right away. But they
+hold out your first month's pay for your passage over, and by that
+time the tropics has its grip on ye. Ye're surrounded by a ragin'
+forest full of disreputable beasts--lions and baboons and anacondas--
+waiting to devour ye. The sun strikes ye hard, and melts the marrow
+in your bones. Ye get similar to the lettuce--eaters the poetry-books
+speaks about. Ye forget the elevated sintiments of life, such as
+patriotism, revenge, disturbances of the peace and the dacint love of
+a clane shirt. Ye do your work, and ye swallow the kerosene ile and
+rubber pipestems dished up to ye by the Dago cook for food. Ye light
+your pipeful, and say to yourself, "Nixt week I'll break away," and ye
+go to sleep and call yersilf a liar, for ye know yell never do it.'
+
+ 'Who is this general man,' asks I, 'that calls himself De Vega?'
+
+"'Tis the man,' says Halloran, 'who is tryin' to complete the
+finishin' of the railroad. 'Twas the project of a private
+corporation, but it busted, and then the government took it up.
+De Vegy is a big politician, and wants to be president. The people
+want the railroad completed, as they're taxed mighty on account of it.
+The De Vegy man is pushing it along as a campaign move.'
+
+"''Tis not my way,' says I, 'to make threats against any man, but
+there's an account to be settled between the railroad man and James
+O'Dowd Clancy.'
+
+"''Twas that way I thought, mesilf, at first,' Halloran says, with
+a big sigh, 'until I got to be a lettuce-eater. The fault's wid these
+tropics. They rejuices a man's system. 'Tis a land, as the poet
+says, "Where it always seems to be after dinner." I does me work
+and smokes me pipe and sleeps. There's little else in life, anyway.
+Ye'll get that way yersilf, mighty soon. Don't be harborin' any
+sentiments at all, Clancy.'
+
+"'I can't help it,' says I; I'm full of 'em. I enlisted in the
+revolutionary army of this dark country in good faith to fight for
+its liberty, honors, and silver candlesticks; instead of which I am
+set to amputatin' its scenery and grubbin' its roots. 'Tis the
+general man will have to pay for it.'
+
+"Two months I worked on that railroad before I found a chance to get
+away. One day a gang of us was sent back to the end of the completed
+line to fetch some picks that had been sent down to Port Barrios to
+be sharpened. They were brought on a hand-car, and I noticed, when
+I started away, that the car was left there on the track.
+
+"That night, about twelve, I woke up Halloran and told him my scheme.
+
+"'Run away?' says Halloran. 'Good Lord, Clancy, do ye mean it? Why,
+I ain't got the nerve. It's too chilly, and I ain't slept enough.
+Run away? I told you, Clancy, I've eat the lettuce. I've lost my
+grip. 'Tis the tropics that's done it. 'Tis like the poet says:
+"Forgotten are our friends that we have left behind; in the hollow
+lettuce-land we will live and lay reclined." You better go on,
+Clancy. I'll stay, I guess. It's too early and cold, and I'm
+sleepy.'
+
+"So I had to leave Halloran. I dressed quiet, and slipped out
+of the tent we were in. When the guard came along I knocked him
+over, like a ninepin, with a green coconut I had, and made for the
+railroad. I got on that hand-car and made it fly. 'Twas yet a while
+before daybreak when I saw the lights of Port Barrios about a mile
+away. I stopped the hand-car there and walked to the town. I stepped
+inside the corporations of that town with care and hesitations.
+I was not afraid of the army of Guatemala, but me soul quaked at
+the prospect of a hand-to-hand struggle with its employment bureau.
+'Tis a country that hires its help easy and keeps 'em long. Sure I
+can fancy Missis America and Missis Guatemala passin' a bit of gossip
+some fine, still night across the mountains. 'Oh, dear,' says Missis
+America, 'and it's a lot of trouble I'm havin' ag'in with the help,
+senora, ma'am.' 'Laws, now!' says Missis Guatemala, 'you don't say
+so, ma'am! now, mine never think ofleavin me--te-he! ma'am,' snickers
+Missis Guatemala.
+
+"I was wonderin' how I was goin' to move away from them tropics
+without bein' hired again. Dark as it was, I could see a steamer
+ridin' in the harbor, with smoke emergin' from her stacks. I turned
+down a little grass street that run down to the water. On the beach
+I found a little brown nigger-man just about to shove off in a skiff.
+
+"'Hold on, Sambo,' says I, 'savve English?'
+
+"'Heap plenty, yes,' says he, with a pleasant grin.
+
+"'What steamer is that?' I asks him, 'and where is it going? And
+what's the news, and the good word and the time of day?'
+
+" 'That steamer the ~Conchita~,' said the brown man, affable and easy,
+rollin' a cigarette. 'Him come from New Orleans for load banana.
+Him got load last night. I think him sail in one, two hour. Verree
+nice day we shall be goin' have. You hear some talkee 'bout big
+battle, maybe so? You think catchee General De Vega, senor? Yes?
+No?'
+
+"'How's that, Sambo?' says I. 'Big battle? What battle? Who wants
+catchee General De Vega? I've been up at my old gold mines in the
+interior for a couple of months, and haven't heard any news.'
+
+"'Oh,' says the nigger-man, proud to speak the English, 'verree great
+revolution in Guatemala one week ago. General De Vega, him try be
+president. Him raise armee--one--five--ten thousand mans for fight
+at the government. Those one government send five--forty--hundred
+thousand soldier to suppress revolution. They fight big battle
+yesterday at Lomagrande--that about nineteen or fifty mile in the
+mountain. That government soldier wheep General De Vega--oh, most
+bad. Five hundred--nine hundred--two thousand of his mans is kill.
+That revolution is smash suppress--bust--very quick. General De Vega,
+him r-r-run away fast on one big mule. Yes, ~carrambos!~ The
+general, him r-r-run away, and his armee is kill. That government
+soldier, they try find General De Vega verree much. They want catchee
+him for shoot. You think they catchee that general, senor?'
+
+"'Saints grant it!' says I. ''Twould be the judgment of Providence
+for settin' the warlike talent of a Clancy to gradin' the tropics
+with a pick and shovel. But 'tis not so much a question of
+insurrections now, me little man, as 'tis of the hired-man problem.
+'Tis anxious I am to resign a situation of responsibility and trust
+with the white wings department of your great and degraded country.
+Row me in your little boat out to that steamer, and I'll give ye five
+dollars--sinker pacers--sinker pacers,' says I, reducing the offer
+to the language and denomination of the tropic dialects.
+
+"'Cinco pesos,' repeats the little man. Five dollee, you give?'
+
+"'Twas not such a bad little man. He had hesitations at first,
+sayin' that passengers leavin' the country had to have papers and
+passports, but at last he took me out alongside the steamer.
+
+"Day was just breakin' as we struck her, and there wasn't a soul to
+be seen on board. The water was very still, and the nigger-man gave
+me a lift from the boat, and I climbed onto the steamer where her side
+was sliced to the deck for loadin' fruit. The hatches was open, and
+I looked down and saw the cargo of bananas that filled the hold to
+within six feet of the top. I thinks to myself, 'Clancy, you better
+go as a stowaway. It's safer. The steamer men might hand you back
+to the employment bureau. The tropic'll get you, Clancy, if you
+don't watch out.'
+
+"So I jumps down easy among the bananas, and digs out a hole to hide
+in among the bunches. In an hour or so I could hear the engines
+goin', and feel the steamer rockin', and I knew we were off to sea.
+They left the hatches open for ventilation, and pretty soon it was
+light enough in the hold to see fairly well. I got to feelin'
+a bit hungry, and thought I'd have a light fruit lunch, by way
+of refreshment. I creeped out of the hole I'd made and stood up
+straight. Just then I saw another man crawl up about ten feet away
+and reach out and skin a banana and stuff it into his mouth. 'Twas
+a dirty man, black-faced and ragged and disgraceful of aspect. Yes,
+the man was a ringer for the pictures of the fat Weary Willie in the
+funny papers. I looked again, and saw it was my general man--De Vega,
+the great revolutionist, mule-rider and pickaxe importer. When he
+saw me the general hesitated with his mouth filled with banana and
+his eyes the size of coconuts.
+
+"'Hist!' I says. 'Not a word, or they'll put us off and make us walk.
+"Veev la Liberty!"' I adds, copperin' the sentiment by shovin' a
+banana into the source of it. I was certain the general wouldn't
+recognize me. The nefarious work of the tropics had left me lookin'
+different. There was half an inch of roan whiskers coverin' me face,
+and me costume was a pair of blue overalls and a red shirt.
+
+"'How you come in the ship, senor?' asked the general as soon as he
+could speak.
+
+"'By the back door--whist!' says I. ''Twas a glorious blow for
+liberty we struck,' I continues; 'but we was overpowered by numbers.
+Let us accept our defeat like brave men and eat another banana.'
+
+"'Were you in the cause of liberty fightin', senor?' says the general,
+sheddin' tears on the cargo.
+
+"'To the last,' says I. ''Twas I led the last desperate charge
+against the minions of the tyrant. But it made them mad, and we was
+forced to retreat. 'Twas I, general, procured the mule upon which
+you escaped. Could you give that ripe bunch a little boost this way,
+general? It's a bit out of my reach. Thanks.'
+
+"'Say you so, brave patriot?' said the general, again weepin'. 'Ah,
+~Dios!~ And I have not the means to reward your devotion. Barely
+did I my life bring away. ~Carrambos!~ what a devil's animal was that
+mule, senor! Like ships in one storm was I dashed about. The skin
+on myself was ripped away with the thorns and vines. Upon the bark
+of a hundred trees did that beast of the infernal bump, and cause
+outrage to the legs of mine. In the night to Port Barrios I came.
+I dispossess myself of that mountain of mule and hasten along the
+water shore. I find a little boat to be tied. I launch myself and
+row to the steamer. I cannot see any mans on board, so I climbed one
+rope which hang at the side. I then myself hide in the bananas.
+Surely, I say, if the ship captains view me, they shall throw me again
+to those Guatemala. Those things are not good. Guatemala will shoot
+General De Vega. Therefore, I am hide and remain silent. Life itself
+is glorious. Liberty, it is pretty good; but so good as life I do not
+think.'
+
+"Three days, as I said, was the trip to New Orleans. The general man
+and me got to be cronies of the deepest dye. Bananas we ate until
+they were distasteful to the sight and an eyesore to the palate, but
+to bananas alone was the bill of fare reduced. At night I crawls out,
+careful, on the lower deck, and gets a bucketful of fresh water.
+
+"That General De Vega was a man inhabited by an engorgement of words
+and sentences. He added to the monotony of the voyage by divestin'
+himself of conversation. He believed I was a revolutionist of his
+own party, there bein' as he told me, a good many Americans and other
+foreigners in its ranks. 'Twas a braggart and a conceited little
+gabbler it was, though he considered himself a hero. 'Twas on himself
+he wasted all his regrets at the failing of his plot. Not a word did
+the little balloon have to say about the other misbehaving idiots that
+had been shot, or run themselves to death in his revolution.
+
+"The second day out he was feelin' pretty braggy and uppish for a
+stowed-away conspirator that owed his existence to a mule and stolen
+bananas. He was tellin' me about the great railroad he had been
+buildin', and he relates what he calls a comic incident about a fool
+Irishman he inveigled from New Orleans to sling a pick on his little
+morgue of a narrow-gauge line. 'Twas sorrowful to hear the little,
+dirty general tell the opprobrious story of how he put salt upon the
+tail of that reckless and silly bird, Clancy. Laugh, he did, hearty
+and long. He shook with laughin', the black-faced rebel and outcast,
+standing neck-deep in bananas, without friends or country.
+
+"'Ah, senor,' he snickers, 'to death you would have laughed at that
+drollest Irish. I say to him: "Strong, big mans is need very much
+in Guatemala." "I will blows strike for your down-pressed country,"
+he say. "That shall you do," I tell him. Ah! it was an Irish so
+comic. He sees one box break upon the wharf that contain for the
+guard a few gun. He think there is gun in all the box. But that is
+all pickaxe. Yes. Ah! senor, could you the face of that Irish have
+seen when they set him to the work!'
+
+"'Twas thus the ex-boss of the employment bureau contributed to the
+tedium of the trip with merry jests and anecdote. But now and then
+he would weep upon the bananas and make oration about the lost cause
+of liberty and the mule.
+
+"'Twas a pleasant sound when the steamer bumped against the pier in
+New Orleans. Pretty soon we heard the pat-a-pat of hundreds of bare
+feet, and the Dago gang that unloads the fruit jumped on the deck and
+down into the hold. Me and the general worked a while at passing up
+the bunches, and they thought we were part of the gang. After about
+an hour we managed to slip off the steamer onto the wharf.
+
+"'Twas a great honor on the hands of an obscure Clancy, havin' the
+entertainment of the representative of a great foreign filibustering
+power. I first bought for the general and myself many long drinks
+and things to eat that were not bananas. The general man trotted
+along at my side, leaving all the arrangements to me. I led him
+up to Lafayette Square and set him on a bench in the little park.
+Cigarettes I had bought for him, and he humped himself down on the
+seat like a little, fat, contented hobo. I look him over as he sets
+there, and what I see pleases me. Brown by nature and instinct, he
+is now brindled with dirt and dust. Praise to the mule, his clothes
+is mostly strings and flaps. Yes, the looks of the general man is
+agreeable to Clancy.
+
+"I asks him, delicate, if, by any chance, he brought away anybody's
+money with him from Guatemala. He sighs and humps his shoulders
+against the bench. Not a cent. All right. Maybe, he tells me,
+some of his friends in the tropic outfit will send him funds later.
+The general was as clear a case of no visible means as I ever saw.
+
+"I told him not to move from the bench, and then I went up to the
+corner of Poydras and Carondelet. Along there is O'Hara's beat.
+In five minutes along comes O'Hara, a big, fine man, red-faced,
+with shinin' buttons, swinging his club. 'Twould be a fine thing
+for Guatemala to move into O'Hara's precinct. 'Twould be a fine bit
+of recreation for Danny to suppress revolutions and uprisins once or
+twice a week with his club.
+
+"'Is 5046 workin' yet, Danny?' says I, walking up to him.
+
+"'Overtime,' says O'Hara, looking over me suspicious. 'Want some
+of it?'
+
+"Fifty-forty-six is the celebrated city ordinance authorizing arrest,
+conviction and imprisonment of persons that succeed in concealing
+their crimes from the police.
+
+"'Don't ye know Jimmy Clancy?' says I. 'Ye pink-gilled monster.'
+So, when O'Hara recognized me beneath the scandalous exterior bestowed
+upon me by the tropics, I backed him into a doorway and told him what
+I wanted, and why I wanted it. 'All right, Jimmy,' says O'Hara. 'Go
+back and hold the bench. I'll be along in ten minutes.'
+
+"In that time O'Hara strolled through Lafayette Square and spied two
+Weary Willies disgracin' one of the benches. In ten minutes more
+J. Clancy and General De Vega, late candidate for the presidency of
+Guatemala, was in the station house. The general is badly frightened,
+and calls upon me to proclaim his distinguishments and rank.
+
+"'The man,' says I to the police, 'used to be a railroad man. He's
+on the bum now. 'Tis a little bughouse he is, on account of losin'
+his job.'
+
+"'~Carrambos!~' says the general, fizzin' like a little soda-fountain,
+'you fought, senor, with my forces in my native country. Why do you
+say the lies? You shall say I am the General De Vega, one soldier,
+one ~caballero~--'
+
+"'Railroader,' says I again. 'On the hog. No good. Been livin' for
+three days on stolen bananas. Look at him. Ain't that enough?'
+
+"Twenty-five dollars or sixty days, was what the recorder gave the
+general. He didn't have a cent, so he took the time. They let me go,
+as I knew they would, for I had money to show, and O'Hara spoke for
+me. Yes; sixty days he got. 'Twas just so long as I slung a pick
+for the great country of Kam--Guatemala."
+
+Clancy paused. The bright starlight showed a reminiscent look of
+happy content on his seasoned features. Keogh leaned in his chair
+and gave his partner a slap on his thinly clad back that sounded
+like the crack of the surf on the sands.
+
+"Tell 'em, ye divil," he chuckled, "how you got even with the tropical
+general in the way of agricultural maneuverings."
+
+"'Having no money," concluded Clancy, with unction, "they set him
+to work his fine out with a gang from the parish prison clearing
+Ursulines Street. Around the corner was a saloon decorated genially
+with electric fans and cool merchandise. I made that me headquarters,
+and every fifteen minutes I'd walk around and take a look at the
+little man filibusterin' with a rake and shovel. 'Twas just such
+a hot broth of a day as this has been. And I'd call at him 'Hey,
+monseer!' and he'd look at me black, with the damp showin' through
+his shirt in places.
+
+"'Fat, strong mans,' says I to General De Vega, 'is needed in New
+Orleans. Yes. To carry on the good work. Carrambos! Erin go
+bragh!"
+
+
+
+XI
+
+The Remnants of the Code
+
+Breakfast in Coralio was at eleven. Therefore the people did not go
+to market early. The little wooden market-house stood on a patch of
+short-trimmed grass, under the vivid green foliage of a bread-fruit
+tree.
+
+Thither one morning the venders leisurely convened, bringing their
+wares with them. A porch or platform six feet wide encircled the
+building, shaded from the mid-morning sun by the projecting, grass-
+thatched roof. Upon this platform the venders were wont to display
+their goods--newly killed beef, fish, crabs, fruit of the country,
+cassava, eggs, ~dulces~ and high, tottering stacks of native tortillas
+as large around as the sombrero of a Spanish grandee.
+
+But on this morning they whose stations lay on the seaward side
+of the market-house, instead of spreading their merchandise formed
+themselves into a softly jabbering and gesticulating group. For there
+upon their space of the platform was sprawled, asleep, the unbeautiful
+figure of "Beelzebub" Blythe. He lay upon a ragged strip of cocoa
+matting, more than ever a fallen angel in appearance. His suit of
+coarse flax, soiled, bursting at the seams, crumpled into a thousand
+diversified wrinkles and creases, inclosed him absurdly, like the garb
+of some effigy that had been stuffed in sport and thrown there after
+indignity had been wrought upon it. But firmly upon the high bridge
+of his nose reposed his gold-rimmed glasses, the surviving badge of
+his ancient glory.
+
+The sun's rays, reflecting quiveringly from the rippling sea upon his
+face, and the voices of the market-men woke "Beelzebub" Blythe. He
+sat up, blinking, and leaned his back against the wall of the market.
+Drawing a blighted silk handkerchief from his pocket, he assiduously
+rubbed and burnished his glasses. And while doing this he became
+aware that his bedroom had been invaded, and that polite brown and
+yellow men were beseeching him to vacate in favor of their market
+stuff.
+
+If the senor would have the goodness--a thousand pardons for bringing
+to him molestation--but soon would come the ~compradores~ for the
+day's provisions--surely they had ten thousand regrets at disturbing
+him!
+
+In this manner they expanded to him the intimation that he must clear
+out and cease to clog the wheels of trade.
+
+Blythe stepped from the platform with the air of a prince leaving
+his canopied couch. He never quite lost that air, even at the lowest
+point of his fall. It is clear that the college of good breeding does
+not necessarily maintain a chair of morals within its walls.
+
+Blythe shook out his wry clothing, and moved slowly up the Calle
+Grande through the hot sand. He moved without a destination in
+his mind. The little town was languidly stirring to its daily life.
+Golden-skinned babies tumbled over one another in the grass. The sea
+breeze brought him appetite, but nothing to satisfy it. Throughout
+Coralio were its morning odors--those from the heavily fragrant
+tropical flowers and from the bread baking in the outdoor ovens of
+clay and the pervading smoke of their fires. Where the smoke cleared,
+the crystal air, with some of the efficacy of faith, seemed to remove
+the mountains almost to the sea, bringing them so near that one might
+count the scarred glades on their wooded sides. The light-footed
+Caribs were swiftly gliding to their tasks at the waterside. Already
+along the bosky trails from the banana groves files of horses were
+slowly moving, concealed, except for their nodding heads and plodding
+legs, by the bunches of green-golden fruit heaped upon their backs.
+On doorsills sat women combing their long, black hair and calling, one
+to another, across the narrow thoroughfares. Peace reigned in Coralio
+--arid and bald peace; but still peace.
+
+On that bright morning when Nature seemed to be offering the lotus
+on the Dawn's golden platter "Beelzebub" Blythe had reached rock
+bottom. Further descent seemed impossible. That last night's slumber
+in a public place had done for him. As long as he had had a roof
+to cover him there had remained, unbridged, the space that separates
+a gentleman from the beasts of the jungle and the fowls of the air.
+But now he was little more than a whimpering oyster led to be devoured
+on the sands of a Southern sea by the artful walrus, Circumstance,
+and the implacable carpenter, Fate.
+
+To Blythe money was now but a memory. He had drained his friends
+of all that their good-fellowship had to offer; then he had squeezed
+them to the last drop of their generosity; and at last, Aaron-like,
+he had smitten the rock of their hardening bosoms for the scattering,
+ignoble drops of Charity itself.
+
+He had exhausted his credit to the last real. With the minute
+keenness of the shameless sponger he was aware of every source in
+Coralio from which a glass of rum, a meal or a piece of silver could
+be wheedled. Marshalling each such source in his mind, he considered
+it with all the thoroughness and penetration that hunger and thirst
+lent him for the task. All his optimism failed to thresh a grain of
+hope from the chaff of his postulations. He had played out the game.
+That one night in the open had shaken his nerves. Until then there
+had been left to him at least a few grounds upon which he could base
+his unblushing demands upon his neighbors' stores. Now he must beg
+instead of borrowing. The most brazen sophistry could not dignify
+by the name of "loan" the coin contemptuously flung to a beachcomber
+who slept on the bare boards of the public market.
+
+But on this morning no beggar would have more thankfully received
+a charitable coin, for the demon thirst had him by the throat--the
+drunkard's matutinal thirst that requires to be slaked at each morning
+station on the road to Tophet.
+
+Blythe walked slowly up the street, keeping a watchful eye for any
+miracle that might drop manna upon him in his wilderness. As he
+passed the popular eating house of Madama Vasquez, Madama's boarders
+were just sitting down to freshly baked bread, ~aguacates~, pines
+and delicious coffee that sent forth odorous guarantee of its quality
+upon the breeze. Madama was serving; she turned her shy, stolid,
+melancholy gaze for a moment out the window; she saw Blythe, and
+her expression turned more shy and embarrassed. "Beelzebub" owed
+her twenty pesos. He bowed as he had once bowed to less embarrassed
+dames to whom he owed nothing, and passed on.
+
+Merchants and their clerks were throwing open the solid wooden doors
+of their shops. Polite but cool were the glances they cast upon
+Blythe as he lounged tentatively by with the remains of his old jaunty
+air; for they were his creditors almost without exception.
+
+At the little fountain in the ~plaza~ he made an apology for a toilet
+with his wetted handkerchief. Across the open square filed the
+dolorous line of friends to the prisoners in the calaboza, bearing
+the morning meal of the immured. The food in their hands roused small
+longing in Blythe.
+
+It was drink that his soul craved, or money to buy it. In the streets
+he met many with whom he had been friends and equals, and whose
+patience and liberality he had gradually exhausted. Willard Geddie
+and Paula cantered past him with the coolest of nods, returning from
+their daily horseback ride along the old Indian road. Keogh passed
+him at another corner, whistling cheerfully and bearing a prize of
+newly laid eggs for the breakfast of himself and Clancy. The jovial
+scout of Fortune was one of Blythe's victims who had plunged his hand
+oftenest into his pocket to aid him. But now it seemed that Keogh,
+too, had fortified himself against further invasions. His curt
+greeting and the ominous light in his full, gray eye quickened the
+steps of "Beelzebub," whom desperation had almost incited to attempt
+an additional "loan."
+
+Three drinking shops the forlorn one next visited in succession.
+In all of these his money, his credit and his welcome had long since
+been spent; but Blythe felt that he would have fawned in the dust at
+the feet of an enemy that morning for one draught of ~aguardiente~.
+In two of the ~pulperias~ his courageous petition for drink was met
+with a refusal so polite that it stung worse than abuse. The third
+establishment had acquired something of American methods; and here
+he was seized bodily and cast out upon his hands and knees.
+
+This physical indignity caused a singular change in the man.
+As he picked himself up and walked away, an expression of absolute
+relief came upon his features. The specious and conciliatory
+smile that had been graven there was succeeded by a look of calm
+and sinister resolve. "Beelzebub" had been floundering in the sea
+of improbability, holding by a slender life-line to the respectable
+world that had cast him overboard. He must have felt that with this
+ultimate shock the line had snapped, and have experienced the welcome
+ease of the drowning swimmer who has ceased to struggle.
+
+Blythe walked to the next corner and stood there while he brushed
+the sand from his garments and repolished his glasses.
+
+"I've got to do it--oh, I've got to do it," he told himself, aloud.
+"If I had a quart of rum I believe I could stave it off yet--for a
+little while. But there's no more rum for--'Beelzebub,' as they call
+me. By the flames of Tartarus! if I'm to sit at the right hand of
+Satan somebody has got to pay the court expenses. You'll have to pony
+up, Mr. Frank Goodwin. You're a good fellow; but a gentleman must
+draw the line at being kicked into the gutter. Blackmail isn't a
+pretty word, but it's the next station on the road I'm travelling."
+
+With purpose in his steps Blythe now moved rapidly through the town
+by way of its landward environs. He passed through the squalid
+quarters of the improvident negroes and on beyond the picturesque
+shacks of the poorer mestizos. From many points along his course he
+could see, through the umbrageous glades, the house of Frank Goodwin
+on its wooded hill. And as he crossed the little bridge over the
+lagoon he saw the old Indian, Galvez, scrubbing at the wooden slab
+that bore the name of Miraflores. Beyond the lagoon the lands of
+Goodwin began to slope gently upward. A grassy road, shaded by
+a munificent and diverse array of tropical flora wound from the edge
+of an outlying banana grove to the dwelling. Blythe took this road
+with long and purposeful strides.
+
+Goodwin was seated on his coolest gallery, dictating letters to his
+secretary, a sallow and capable native youth. The household adhered
+to the American plan of breakfast; and that meal had been a thing of
+the past for the better part of an hour.
+
+The castaway walked to the steps, and flourished a hand.
+
+"Good morning, Blythe, said Goodwin, looking up. "Come in and have
+a chair. Anything I can do for you?"
+
+"I want to speak to you in private."
+
+Goodwin nodded at his secretary, who strolled out under a mango tree
+and lit a cigarette. Blythe took the chair that he had left vacant.
+
+"I want some money," he began, doggedly.
+
+"I'm sorry," said Goodwin, with equal directness, "but you can't have
+any. You're drinking yourself to death, Blythe. Your friends have
+done all they could to help you to brace up. You won't help yourself.
+There's no use furnishing you with money to ruin yourself with any
+longer."
+
+"Dear man," said Blythe, tilting back his chair, "it isn't a question
+of social economy now. It's past that. I like you, Goodwin; and I've
+come to stick a knife between your ribs. I was kicked out of Espada's
+saloon this morning; and Society owes me reparation for my wounded
+feelings."
+
+"I didn't kick you out."
+
+"No--but in a general way you represent Society; and in a particular
+way you represent my last chance. I've had to come down to it, old
+man--I tried to do it a month ago when Losada's man was here turning
+things over; but I couldn't do it then. Now it's different. I want
+a thousand dollars, Goodwin; and you'll have to give it to me."
+
+"Only last week," said Goodwin, with a smile, "a silver dollar was
+all you were asking for."
+
+"An evidence," said Blythe, flippantly, "that I was still virtuous--
+though under heavy pressure. The wages of sin should be something
+higher than a peso worth forty-eight cents. Let's talk business.
+I am the villain in the third act; and I must have my merited,
+if only temporary, triumph. I saw you collar the late president's
+valiseful of boodle. Oh, I know it's blackmail; but I'm liberal
+about the price. I know I'm a cheap villain--one of the regular
+sawmill-drama kind--but you're one of my particular friends, and
+I don't want to stick you hard."
+
+"Suppose you go into the details," suggested Goodwin, calmly
+arranging his letters on the table.
+
+"All right," said "Beelzebub." "I like the way you take it.
+I despise histrionics; so you will please prepare yourself for
+the facts without any red fire, calcium or grace notes on
+the saxophone.
+
+"On the night that His Fly-by-night Excellency arrived in town I was
+very drunk. You will excuse the pride with which I state that fact;
+but it was quite a feat for me to attain that desirable state.
+Somebody had left a cot out under the orange trees in the yard of
+Madama Ortiz's hotel. I stepped over the wall, laid down upon it,
+and fell asleep. I was awakened by an orange that dropped from
+the tree upon my nose; and I laid there for a while cursing Sir Isaac
+Newton, or whoever it was that invented gravitation, for not confining
+his theory to apples.
+
+"And then along came Mr. Miraflores and his true-love with the
+treasury in a valise, and went into the hotel. Next you hove in
+sight, and held a pow-wow with the tonsorial artist who insisted
+upon talking shop after hours. I tried to slumber again; but once
+more my rest was disturbed--this time by the noise of the popgun
+that went off upstairs. Then that valise came crashing down into
+an orange tree just above my head; and I arose from my couch, not
+knowing when it might begin to rain Saratoga trunks. When the army
+and the constabulary began to arrive, with their medals and
+decorations hastily pinned to their pajamas, and their snickersnees
+drawn, I crawled into the welcome shadow of a banana plant. I
+remained there for an hour, by which time the excitement and the
+people had cleared away. And then, my dear Goodwin--excuse me--I saw
+you sneak back and pluck that ripe and juicy valise from the orange
+tree. I followed you, and saw you take it to your own house. A
+hundred-thousand-dollar crop from one orange tree in a season about
+breaks the record of the fruit-growing industry.
+
+"Being a gentleman at that time, of course I never mentioned the
+incident to any one. But this morning I was kicked out of a saloon,
+my code of honor is all out at the elbows, and I'd sell my mother's
+prayer-book for three fingers of ~aguardiente~. I'm not putting
+on the screws hard. It ought to be worth a thousand to you for me
+to have slept on that cot through the whole business without waking
+up and seeing anything."
+
+Goodwin opened two more letters, and made memoranda in pencil on them.
+Then he called "Manuel!" to his secretary, who came, spryly.
+
+"The ~Ariel~--when does she sail?" asked Goodwin. "Senor," answered
+the youth, "at three this afternoon. She drops down-coast to Punta
+Soledad to complete her cargo of fruit. From there she sails for New
+Orleans without delay."
+
+"~Bueno!~" said Goodwin. "These letters may wait yet awhile."
+
+The secretary returned to his cigarette under the mango tree.
+
+In round numbers," said Goodwin, facing Blythe squarely, "how much
+money do you owe in this town, not including the sums you have
+'borrowed' from me?"
+
+"Five hundred--at a rough guess," answered Blythe, lightly.
+
+"Go somewhere in the town and draw up a schedule of your debts," said
+Goodwin. "Come back here in two hours, and I will send Manuel with
+the money to pay them. I will also have a decent outfit of clothing
+ready for you. You will sail on the ~Ariel~ at three. Manuel will
+accompany you as far as the deck of the steamer. There he will hand
+you one thousand dollars in cash. I suppose that we needn't discuss
+what you will be expected to do in return?"
+
+"Oh, I understand," piped Blythe, cheerily. "I was asleep all the
+time on the cot under Madama Ortiz's orange trees; and I shake off
+the dust of Coralio forever. I'll play fair. No more of the lotus
+for me. Your proposition is 0. K. Youre a good fellow, Goodwin; and
+I let you off light. I'll agree to everything. But in the meantime
+--I've a devil of a thirst on, old man--"
+
+"Not a ~centavo~," said Goodwin, firmly, "until you are on board the
+~Ariel~. You would be drunk in thirty minutes if you had money now."
+
+But he noticed the blood-streaked eyeballs, the relaxed form and
+the shaking hands of "Beelzebub"; and he stepped into the dining
+room through the low window, and brought out a glass and a decanter
+of brandy.
+
+"Take a bracer, anyway, before you go," he proposed, even as a man
+to the friend whom he entertains.
+
+"Beelzebub" Blythe's eyes glistened at the sight of the solace for
+which his soul burned. Today for the first time his poisoned nerves
+had been denied their steadying dose; and their retort was a mounting
+torment. He grasped the decanter and rattled its crystal mouth
+against the glass in his trembling hand. He flushed the glass,
+and then stood erect, holding it aloft for an instant. For one
+fleeting moment he held his head above the drowning waves of
+his abyss. He nodded easily at Goodwin, raised his brimming glass
+and murmured a "health" that men had used in his ancient Paradise
+Lost. And then so suddenly that he spilled the brandy over his hand,
+he set down his glass, untasted.
+
+"In two hours," his dry lips muttered to Goodwin, as he marched down
+the steps and turned his face toward the town.
+
+In the edge of the cool banana grove "Beelzebub" halted, and snapped
+the tongue of his belt buckle into another hole.
+
+"I couldn't do it," he explained, feverishly, to the waving banana
+fronds. "I wanted to, but I couldn't. A gentleman can't drink with
+the man that he blackmails."
+
+
+
+XII
+
+Shoes
+
+John De Graffenreid Atwood ate of the lotus, root, stem, and flower.
+The tropics gobbled him up. He plunged enthusiastically into his
+work, which was to try to forget Rosine.
+
+Now, they who dine on the lotus rarely consume it plain. There is
+a sauce ~au diable~ that goes with it; and the distillers are the
+chefs who prepare it. And on Johnny's menu card it read "brandy."
+With a bottle between them, he and Billy Keogh would sit on the porch
+of the little consulate at night and roar out great, indecorous songs,
+until the natives, slipping hastily past, would shrug a shoulder and
+mutter things to themselves about the "~Americanos diablos~."
+
+One day Johnny's ~mozo~ brought the mail and dumped it on the table.
+Johnny leaned from his hammock, and fingered the four or five letters
+dejectedly. Keogh was sitting on the edge of the table chopping
+lazily with a paper knife at the legs of a centipede that was crawling
+among the stationery. Johnny was in that phase of lotus-eating when
+all the world tastes bitter in one's mouth.
+
+"Same old thing!" he complained. "Fool people writing for information
+about the country. They want to know all about raising fruit, and how
+to make a fortune without work. Half of 'em don't even send stamps
+for a reply. They think a consul hasn't anything to do but write
+letters. Slit those envelopes for me, old man, and see what they
+want. I'm feeling too rocky to move."
+
+Keogh, acclimated beyond all possibility of ill-humor, drew his chair
+to the table with smiling compliance on his rose-pink countenance,
+and began to slit open the letters. Four of them were from citizens
+in various parts of the United States who seemed to regard the consul
+at Coralio as a cyclopedia of information. They asked long lists
+of questions, numerically arranged, about the climate, products,
+possibilities, laws, business chances, and statistics of the country
+in which the consul had the honor of representing his own government.
+
+"Write 'em, please, Billy," said that inert official, "just a line,
+referring them to the latest consular report. Tell 'em the State
+Department will be delighted to furnish the literary gems. Sign my
+name. Don't let your pen scratch, Billy; it'll keep me awake."
+
+"Don't snore," said Keogh, amiably, "and I'll do your work for you.
+You need a corps of assistants, anyhow. Don't see how you ever get
+out a report. Wake up a minute--here's one more letter--it's from
+your own town, too--Dalesburg."
+
+"That so?" murmured Johnny showing a mild and obligatory interest.
+"What's it about?"
+
+"Postmaster writes," explained Keogh. "Says a citizen of the town
+wants some facts and advice from you. Says the citizen has an idea
+in his head of coming down where you are and opening a shoe store.
+Wants to know if you think the business would pay. Says he's heard
+of the boom along this coast, and wants to get in on the ground
+floor."
+
+In spite of the heat and his bad temper, Johnny's hammock swayed
+with his laughter. Keogh laughed too; and the pet monkey on the top
+shelf of the bookcase chattered in shrill sympathy with the ironical
+reception of the letter from Dalesburg.
+
+"Great bunions!" exclaimed the consul. "Shoe store! What'll they ask
+about next, I wonder? Overcoat factory, I reckon. Say, Billy--of our
+3,000 citizens, how many do you suppose ever had on a pair of shoes?"
+
+Keogh reflected judicially.
+
+"Let's see--there's you and me and--"
+
+"Not me," said Johnny, promptly and incorrectly, holding up a foot
+encased in a disreputable deerskin ~zapato~. "I haven't been a victim
+to shoes in months."
+
+"But you've got 'em, though," went on Keogh. "And there's Goodwin
+and Blanchard and Geddie and old Lutz and Doc Gregg and that Italian
+that's agent for the banana company, and there's old Delgado--no; he
+wears sandals. And, oh, yes; there's Madama Ortiz, 'what kapes the
+hotel'--she had on a pair of red kid slippers at the ~baile~ the other
+night. And Miss Pasa, her daughter, that went to school in the States
+--she brought back some civilized notions in the way of footgear. And
+there's the ~comandante's~ sister that dresses up her feet on feast-
+days--and Mrs. Geddie, who wears a two with a Castilian instep--and
+that's about all the ladies. Let's see--don't some of the soldiers at
+the ~cuartel~--no: that's so; they're allowed shoes only when on the
+march. In barracks they turn their little toeses out to grass."
+
+"'Bout right," agreed the consul. "Not over twenty out of the three
+thousand ever felt leather on their walking arrangements. Oh, yes;
+Coralio is just the town for an enterprising shoe store--that doesn't
+want to part with its goods. Wonder if old Patterson is trying to
+jolly me! He always was full of things he called jokes. Write him
+a letter, Billy. I'll dictate it. We'll jolly him back a few."
+
+Keogh dipped his pen, and wrote at Johnny's dictation. With many
+pauses, filled in with smoke and sundry travellings of the bottle
+and glasses, the following reply to the Dalesburg communication was
+perpetrated:
+
+ MR. OBADIAH PATTERSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+
+ ~Dear Sir~: in reply to your favor of July 2d. I have the honor
+ to inform you that, according to my opinion, there is no place on
+ the habitable globe that presents to the eye stronger evidence of
+ the need of a first-class shoe store than does the town of Coralio.
+ There are 3,000 inhabitants in the place, and not a single shoe
+ store! The situation speaks for itself. This coast is rapidly
+ becoming the goal of enterprising business men, but the shoe
+ business is one that has been sadly overlooked or neglected.
+ In fact, there are a considerable number of our citizens actually
+ without shoes at present.
+
+ Besides the want above mentioned, there is also a crying need
+ for a brewery, a college of higher mathematics, a coal yard, and a
+ clean and intellectual Punch and Judy show. I have the honor to be,
+
+ Your Obt. Servant,
+ ~John De Graffenreid Atwood~,
+ U.S. CONSUL AT CORALIO.
+
+ P.S.--Hello! Uncle Obadiah. How's the old burg racking along?
+ What would the government do without you and me? Look out for
+ a green-headed parrot and a bunch of bananas soon, from your old
+ friend
+
+ ~Johnny~,
+
+
+"I throw in that postscript," explained the consul, "so Uncle Obadiah
+won't take offense at the official tone of the letter! Now, Billy,
+you get that correspondence fixed up, and send Pancho to the post-
+office with it. The ~Ariadne~ takes the mail out tomorrow if they
+make up that load of fruit today."
+
+The night programme in Coralio never varied. The recreations of
+the people were soporific and flat. They wandered about, barefoot
+and aimless, speaking lowly and smoking cigar or cigarette. Looking
+down on the dimly lighted ways one seemed to see a threading maze
+of brunette ghosts tangled with a procession of insane fireflies.
+In some houses the thrumming of lugubrious guitars added to
+the depression of the ~triste~ night. Giant tree-frogs rattled in
+the foliage as loudly as the end man's "bones" in a minstrel troupe.
+By nine o'clock the streets were almost deserted.
+
+Not at the consulate was there often a change of bill. Keogh would
+come there nightly, for Coralio's one cool place was the little porch
+of that official residence. The brandy would be kept moving; and
+before midnight sentiment would begin to stir in the heart of the
+self-exiled consul. Then he would relate to Keogh the story of his
+ended romance. Each night Keogh would listen patiently to the tale,
+and be ready with untiring sympathy.
+
+"But don't you think for a minute"--thus Johnny would always conclude
+his woeful narrative--"that I'm grieving about that girl, Billy. I've
+forgotten her. She never enters my mind. If she were to enter that
+door right now, my pulse wouldn't gain a beat. That's all over long
+ago."
+
+"Don't I know it?" Keogh would answer. "Of course you've forgotten
+her. Proper thing to do. Wasn't quite 0. K. of her to listen to the
+knocks that--er--Dink Pawson kept giving you."
+
+"Pink Dawson!"--a word of contempt would be in Johnny's tones--"Poor
+white trash! That's what he was. Had five hundred acres of farming
+land, though; and that counted. Maybe I'll have a chance to get back
+at him some day. The Dawsons weren't anybody. Everybody in Alabama
+knows the Atwoods. Say, Billy--did you know my mother was a
+De Graffenreid?"
+
+"Why, no," Keogh would say; "is that so?" He had heard it some three
+hundred times.
+
+"Fact. The De Graffenreids of Hancock County. But I never think
+of that girl any more, do I, Billy?"
+
+"Not for a minute, my boy," would be the last sounds heard by
+the conqueror of Cupid.
+
+At this point Johnny would fall into a gentle slumber, and Keogh would
+saunter out to his own shack under the calabash tree at the edge of
+the plaza.
+
+In a day or two the letter from the Dalesburg postmaster and its
+answer had been forgotten by the Coralio exiles. But on the 26th day
+of July the fruit of the reply appeared upon the tree of events.
+
+The ~Andador~, a fruit steamer that visited Coralio regularly, drew
+into the offing and anchored. The beach was lined with spectators
+while the quarantine doctor and the custom-house crew rowed out to
+attend to their duties.
+
+An hour later Billy Keogh lounged into the consulate, clean and cool
+in his linen clothes, and grinning like a pleased shark. "Guess
+what?" he said to Johnny, lounging in his hammock.
+
+"Too hot to guess," said Johnny, lazily.
+
+"Your shoe-store man's come," said Keogh, rolling the sweet morsel on
+his tongue, "with a stock of goods big enough to supply the continent
+as far down as Tierra del Fuego. They're carting his cases over to
+the custom-house now. Six barges full they brought ashore and have
+paddled back for the rest. Oh, ye saints in glory! won't there be
+regalements in the air when he gets onto the joke and has an interview
+with Mr. Consul? It'll be worth nine years in the tropics just to
+witness that one joyful moment."
+
+Keogh loved to take his mirth easily. He selected a clean place
+on the matting and lay upon the floor. The walls shook with his
+enjoyment. Johnny turned half over and blinked.
+
+"Didn't tell me," he said, "that anybody was fool enough to take
+that letter seriously."
+
+"Four-thousand-dollar stock of goods!" gasped Keogh, in ecstasy.
+"Talk about coals to Newcastle! Why didn't he take a ship-load of
+palm-leaf fans to Spitzenbergen while he was about it? Saw the old
+codger on the beach. You ought to have been there when he put on
+his specs and squinted at the five hundred or so barefooted citizens
+standing around."
+
+"Are you telling the truth, Billy?" asked the consul, weakly.
+
+"Am I? You ought to see the buncoed gentleman's daughter he brought
+along. Looks! She makes the brick-dust senoritas here look like
+tar-babies."
+
+"Go on," said Johnny, "if you can stop that asinine giggling. I hate
+to see a grown man make a laughing hyena of himself."
+
+"Name is Hemstetter," went on Keogh. "He's a--Hello! what's the matter
+now?"
+
+Johnny's moccasined feet struck the floor with a thud as he wriggled
+out of his hammock.
+
+"Get up, you idiot," he said, sternly, "or I'll brain you with this
+inkstand. That's Rosine and her father. Gad! what a drivelling idiot
+old Patterson is! Get up, here, Billy Keogh, and help me. What the
+devil are we going to do? Has all the world gone crazy?"
+
+Keogh rose and dusted himself. He managed to regain a decorous
+demeanor.
+
+"Situation has got to be met, Johnny," he said, with some success
+at seriousness. "I didn't think about its being your girl until you
+spoke. First thing to do is to get them comfortable quarters. You
+go down and face the music, and I'll trot out to Goodwin's and see
+if Mrs. Goodwin won't take them in. They've got the decentest house
+in town."
+
+"Bless you, Billy!" said the consul. "I knew you wouldn't desert me.
+The world's bound to come to an end, but maybe we can stave it off for
+a day or two."
+
+Keogh hoisted his umbrella and set out for Goodwin's house. Johnny
+put on his coat and hat. He picked up the brandy bottle, but set it
+down again without drinking, and marched bravely down to the beach.
+
+In the shade of the custom-house walls he found Mr. Hemstetter
+and Rosine surrounded by a mass of gaping citizens. The customs
+officers were ducking and scraping, while the captain of the Andador
+interpreted the business of the new arrivals. Rosine looked healthy
+and very much alive. She was gazing at the strange scenes around her
+with amused interest. There was a faint blush upon her round cheek
+as she greeted her old admirer. Mr. Hemstetter shook hands with
+Johnny in a very friendly way. He was an oldish, impractical man
+--one of that numerous class of erratic business men who are forever
+dissatisfied, and seeking a change.
+
+"I am very glad to see you, John--may I call you John?" he said.
+"Let me thank you for your prompt answer to our postmaster's letter
+of inquiry. He volunteered to write to you on my behalf. I was
+looking about for something different in the way of a business
+in which the profits would be greater. I had noticed in the papers
+that this coast was receiving much attention from investors. I am
+extremely grateful for your advice to come. I sold out everything
+that I possess, and invested the proceeds in as fine a stock of shoes
+as could be bought in the North. You have a picturesque town here,
+John. I hope business will be as good as your letter justifies me
+in expecting."
+
+Johnny's agony was abbreviated by the arrival of Keogh, who hurried up
+with the news that Mrs. Goodwin would be much pleased to place rooms
+at the disposal of Mr. Hemstetter and his daughter. So there Mr.
+Hemstetter and Rosine were at once conducted and left to recuperate
+from the fatigue of the voyage, while Johnny went down to see that
+the cases of shoes were safely stored in the customs warehouse pending
+their examination by the officials. Keogh, grinning like a shark,
+skirmished about to find Goodwin, to instruct him not to expose to
+Mr. Hemstetter the true state of Coralio as a shoe market until Johnny
+had been given a chance to redeem the situation, if such a thing were
+possible.
+
+That night the consul and Keogh held a desperate consultation on
+the breezy porch of the consulate.
+
+Send em back home," began Keogh, reading Johnny's thoughts.
+
+"I would," said Johnny, after a little silence; "but I've been lying
+to you, Billy."
+
+"All right about that," said Keogh, affably.
+
+"I've told you hundreds of times," said Johnny, slowly, "that I had
+forgotten that girl, haven't I?"
+
+"About three hundred and seventy-five," admitted the monument
+of patience.
+
+"I lied," repeated the consul, "every time. I never forgot her for
+one moment. I was an obstinate ass for running away just because she
+said 'No' once. And I was too proud a fool to go back. I talked with
+Rosine a few minutes this evening up at Goodwin's. I found out one
+thing. You remember that farmer fellow who was always after her?"
+
+"Dink Pawson?" asked Keogh.
+
+"Pink Dawson. Well, he wasn't a hill of beans to her. She says she
+didn't believe a word of the things be told her about me. But I'm
+sewed up now, Billy. That tomfool letter we sent ruined whatever
+chance I had left. She'll despise me when she finds out that her
+old father has been made the victim of a joke that a decent schoolboy
+wouldn't have been guilty of. Shoes! Why he couldn't sell twenty
+pairs of shoes in Coralio if he kept store here for twenty years. You
+put a pair of shoes on one of these Caribs or Spanish brown boys and
+what'd he do? Stand on his head and squeal until he'd kicked 'em off.
+None of 'em ever wore shoes and they never will. If I send 'em back
+home I'll have to tell the whole story, and what'll she think of me?
+I want that girl worse than ever, Billy, and now when she's in reach
+I've lost her forever because I tried to be funny when the thermometer
+was at 102."
+
+"Keep cheerful," said the optimistic Keogh. "And let 'em open
+the store. I've been busy myself this afternoon. We can stir up a
+temporary boom in foot-gear anyhow. I'll buy six pairs when the doors
+open. I've been around and seen all the fellows and explained the
+catastrophe. They'll all buy shoes like they was centipedes. Frank
+Goodwin will take cases of 'em. The Geddies want about eleven pairs
+between 'em. Clancy is going to invest the savings of weeks, and even
+old Doc Gregg wants three pairs of alligator-hide slippers if they've
+got any tens. Blanchard got a look at Miss Hemstetter; and as he's
+a Frenchman, no less than a dozen pairs will do for him."
+
+"A dozen customers," said Johnny, "for a $4,000 stock of shoes!
+It won't work. There's a big problem here to figure out. You go
+home, Billy, and leave me alone. I've got to work at it all by
+myself. Take that bottle of Three-star along with you--no, sir;
+not another ounce of booze for the United States consul. I'll sit
+here tonight and pull out the think stop. If there's a soft place
+on this proposition anywhere I'll land on it. If there isn't
+there'll be another wreck to the credit of the gorgeous tropics."
+
+Keogh left, feeling that he could be of no use. Johnny laid a handful
+of cigars on a table and stretched himself in a steamer chair. When
+the sudden daylight broke, silvering the harbor ripples, he was still
+sitting there. Then he got up, whistling a little tune, and took his
+bath.
+
+At nine o'clock he walked down to the dingy little cable office and
+hung for half an hour over a blank. The result of his application was
+the following message, which he signed and had transmitted at a cost
+of $33:
+
+ TO PINKNEY DAWSON,
+ Dalesburg, Ala.
+
+ Draft for $100 comes to you next mail. Ship me immediately 500
+ pounds stiff, dry cockleburrs. New use here in arts. Market price
+ twenty cents pound. Further orders likely. Rush.
+
+
+
+XIII
+
+Ships
+
+Within a week a suitable building had been secured in the Calle
+Grande, and Mr. Hemstetter's stock of shoes arranged upon their
+shelves. The rent of the store was moderate; and the stock made
+a fine showing of neat white boxes, attractively displayed.
+
+Johnny's friends stood by him loyally. On the first day Keogh
+strolled into the store in a casual kind of way about once every hour,
+and bought shoes. After he had purchased a pair each of extension
+soles, congress gaiters, button kids, low-quartered calfs, dancing
+pumps, rubber boots, tans of various hues, tennis shoes and flowered
+slippers, he sought out Johnny to be prompted as to the names of other
+kinds that he might inquire for. The other English-speaking residents
+also played their parts nobly by buying often and liberally. Keogh
+was grand marshal, and made them distribute their patronage, thus
+keeping up a fair run of custom for several days.
+
+Mr. Hemstetter was gratified by the amount of business done thus far;
+but expressed surprise that the natives were so backward with their
+custom.
+
+"Oh, they're awfully shy," explained Johnny, as he wiped his forehead
+nervously. "They'll get the habit pretty soon. They'll come with
+a rush when they do come."
+
+One afternoon Keogh dropped into the consul's office, chewing an
+unlighted cigar thoughtfully.
+
+"Got anything up your sleeve?" he inquired of Johnny. "If you have
+it's about time to show it. If you can borrow some gent's hat in
+the audience, and make a lot of customers for an idle stock of shoes
+come out of it you'd better spiel. The boys have all laid in enough
+footwear to last 'em ten years; and there's nothing doing in the shoe
+store but dolcy far nienty. I just came by there. Your venerable
+victim was standing in the door, gazing through his specs at the bare
+toes passing by his emporium. The natives here have got the true
+artistic temperament. Me and Clancy took eighteen tintypes this
+morning in two hours. There's been but one pair of shoes sold all
+day. Blanchard went in and bought a pair of furlined house-slippers
+because he thought he saw Miss Hemstetter go into the store. I saw
+him throw the slippers into the lagoon afterwards."
+
+"There's a Mobile fruit steamer coming in tomorrow or next day," said
+Johnny. We can't do anything until then."
+
+"What are you going to do--try to create a demand?"
+
+"Political economy isn't your strong point," said the consul,
+impudently. "You can't create a demand. But you can create
+a necessity for a demand. That's what I am going to do."
+
+Two weeks after the consul sent his cable, a fruit steamer brought
+him a huge, mysterious brown bale of some unknown commodity. Johnny's
+influence with the custom-house people was sufficiently strong for
+him to get the goods turned over to him without the usual inspection.
+He had the bale taken to the consulate and snugly stowed in the back
+room. That night he ripped open a corner of it and took out a handful
+of the cockleburrs. He examined them with the care with which a
+warrior examines his arms before he goes forth to battle for his
+lady-love and life. The burrs were the ripe August product, as hard
+as filberts, and bristling with spines as tough and sharp as needles.
+Johnny whistled softly a little tune, and went out to find Billy
+Keogh.
+
+Later in the night, when Coralio was steeped in slumber, he and Billy
+went forth into the deserted streets with their coats bulging like
+balloons. All up and down the Calle Grande they went, sowing the
+sharp burrs carefully in the sand, along the narrow sidewalks, in
+every foot of grass between the silent houses. And then they took
+the side streets and byways, missing none. No place where the foot of
+man, woman or child might fall was slighted. Many trips they made to
+and from the prickly hoard. And then, nearly at the dawn, they laid
+themselves down to rest calmly, as great generals do after planning
+a victory according to the revised tactics, and slept, knowing that
+they had sowed with the accuracy of Satan sowing tares and the
+perseverance of Paul planting.
+
+With the rising sun came the purveyors of fruits and meats, and
+arranged their wares in and around the little market-house. At
+one end of the town near the seashore the market-house stood; and
+the sowing of the burrs had not been carried that far. The dealers
+waited long past the hour when their sales usually began. None
+came to buy. "!Que hay?~" they began to exclaim, one to another.
+At their accustomed time, from every 'dobe and palm hut and grass-
+thatched shack and dim ~patio~ glided women--black women, brown
+women, lemon-colored women, women dun and yellow and tawny. They
+were the marketers starting to purchase the family supply of cassava,
+plantains, meat, fowls, and tortillas. Decollete they were and
+bare-armed and bare-footed, with a single skirt reaching below
+the knee. Stolid and ox-eyed, they stepped from their doorways
+into the narrow paths or upon the soft grass of the streets.
+
+The first to emerge uttered ambiguous squeals, and raised one foot
+quickly. Another step and they sat down, with shrill cries of alarm,
+to pick at the new and painful insects that had stung them upon the
+feet. "~Que picadores diablos!~" they screeched to one another across
+the narrow ways. Some tried the grass instead of the paths, but there
+they were also stung and bitten by the strange little prickly balls.
+They plumped down in the grass, and added their lamentations to those
+of their sisters in the sandy paths. All through the town was heard
+the plaint of the feminine jabber. The venders in the market still
+wondered why no customers came.
+
+Then men, lords of the earth, came forth. They, too, began to hop,
+to dance, to limp, and to curse. They stood stranded and foolish,
+or stopped to pluck at the scourge that attacked their feet and
+ankles. Some loudly proclaimed the pest to be poisonous spiders
+of an unknown species.
+
+And then the children ran out for their morning romp. And now to
+the uproar was added the howls of limping infants and cockleburred
+childhood. Every minute the advancing day brought forth fresh
+victims.
+
+Dona Maria Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas stepped from her
+honored doorway, as was her daily custom, to procure fresh bread
+from the ~panaderia~ across the street. She was clad in a skirt of
+flowered, yellow satin, a chemise of ruffled linen, and wore a purple
+mantilla from the looms of Spain. Her lemon-tinted feet, alas! were
+bare. Her progress was majestic, for were not her ancestors hidalgos
+of Aragon? Three steps she made across the velvety grass, and set
+her aristocratic sole upon a bunch of Johnny's burrs. Dona Maria
+Castillas y Buenventura de las Casas emitted a yowl even as a
+wild-cat. Turning about, she fell upon hands and knees, and crawled
+--ay, like a beast of the field she crawled back to her honorable
+door-sill.
+
+Don Senor Ildefonso Federico Valdazar, ~Juez de la Paz~, weighing
+twenty stone, attempted to convey his bulk to the ~pulperia~ at the
+corner of the plaza in order to assuage his matutinal thirst. The
+first plunge of his unshod foot into the cool grass struck a concealed
+mine. Don Ildefonso fell like a crumpled cathedral, crying out that
+he had been fatally bitten by a deadly scorpion. Everywhere were the
+shoeless citizens hopping, stumbling, limping, and picking from their
+feet the venomous insects that had come in a single night to harass
+them.
+
+The first to perceive the remedy was Esteban Delgado, the barber, a
+man of travel and education. Sitting upon a stone, he plucked burrs
+from his toes, and made oration:
+
+"Behold, my friends, these bugs of the devil! I know them well.
+They soar through the skies in swarms like pigeons. These are dead
+ones that fell during the night. In Yucatan I have seen them as large
+as oranges. Yes! There they hiss like serpents, and have wings like
+bats. It is the shoes--the shoes that one needs! ~Zapatos--zapatos
+para mi!~"
+
+Esteban hobbled to Mr. Hemstetter's store, and bought shoes. Coming
+out, he swaggered down the street with impunity, reviling loudly the
+bugs of the devil. The suffering ones sat up or stood upon one foot
+and beheld the immune barber. Men, women and children took up the
+cry: "~Zapatos! zapatos!~"
+
+The necessity for the demand had been created. The demand followed.
+That day Mr. Hemstetter sold three hundred pairs of shoes.
+
+"It is really surprising," he said to Johnny, who came up in the
+evening to help him straighten out the stock, "how trade is picking
+up. Yesterday I made but three sales."
+
+"I told you they'd whoop things up when they got started," said the
+consul.
+
+"I think I shall order a dozen more cases of goods, to keep the stock
+up," said Mr. Hemstetter, beaming through his spectacles.
+
+"I wouldn't send in any orders yet," advised Johnny. "Wait till you
+see how the trade holds up."
+
+Each night Johnny and Keogh sowed the crop that grew dollars by day.
+At the end of ten days two-thirds of the stock of shoes had been
+sold; and the stock of cockleburrs was exhausted. Johnny cabled
+to Pink Dawson for another 500 pounds, paying twenty cents per pound
+as before. Mr. Hemstetter carefully made up an order for $1500 worth
+of shoes from Northern firms. Johnny hung about the store until this
+order was ready for the mail, and succeeded in destroying it before
+it reached the postoffice.
+
+That night he took Rosine under the mango tree by Godwin's porch,
+and confessed everything. She looked him in the eye, and said: "You
+are a very wicked man. Father and I will go back home. You say it
+was a joke? I think it is a very serious matter."
+
+But at the end of half an hour's argument the conversation had been
+turned upon a different subject. The two were considering the
+respective merits of pale blue and pink wall-paper with which the old
+colonial mansion of the Atwoods in Dalesburg was to be decorated after
+the wedding.
+
+On the next morning Johnny confessed to Mr. Hemstetter. The shoe
+merchant put on his spectacles, and said through them: "You strike me
+as being a most extraordinary young scamp. If I had not managed this
+enterprise with good business judgment my entire stock of goods might
+have been a complete loss. Now, how do you propose to dispose of the
+rest of it?"
+
+When the second invoice of cockleburrs arrived Johnny loaded them and
+the remainder of the shoes into schooner, and sailed down the coast
+to Alazan. There, in the same dark and diabolical manner, he repeated
+his success: and came back with a bag of money and not so much as
+a shoestring.
+
+And then he besought his great Uncle of the waving goatee and starred
+vest to accept his resignation, for the lotus no longer lured him.
+He hankered for the spinach and cress of Dalesburg.
+
+The services of Mr. William Terence Keogh as acting consul, pro term.,
+were suggested and accepted, and Johnny sailed with the Hemstetters
+back to his native shores.
+
+Keogh slipped into the sinecure of the American consulship with
+the ease that never left him even in such high places. The tintype
+establishment was soon to become a thing of the past, although its
+deadly work along the peaceful and helpless Spanish Main was never
+effaced. The restless partners were about to be off again, scouting
+ahead of the slow ranks of Fortune. But now they would take different
+ways. There were rumors of a promising uprising in Peru; and thither
+the martial Clancy would turn his adventurous steps. As for Keogh,
+he was figuring in his mind and on quires of Government letter-heads
+a scheme that dwarfed the art of misrepresenting the human countenance
+upon tin.
+
+"What suits me," Keogh used to say, "in the way of a business
+proposition is something diversified that looks like a longer shot
+than it is--something in the way of a genteel graft that isn't worked
+enough for the correspondence schools to be teaching it by mail.
+I take the long end; but I like to have at least as good a chance to
+win as a man learning to play poker on an ocean steamer, or running
+for governor of Texas on the Republican ticket. And when I cash in
+my winnings I don't want to find any widows' and orphans' chips in
+my stack."
+
+The grass-grown globe was the green table on which Keogh gambled.
+The games he played were of his own invention. He was no grubber
+after the diffident dollar. Nor did he care to follow it with horn
+and hounds. Rather he loved to coax it with egregious and brilliant
+flies from its habitat in the waters of strange streams. Yet Keogh
+was a business man; and his schemes, in spite of their singularity,
+were as solidly set as the plans of a building contractor. In
+Arthur's time Sir William Keogh would have been a Knight of the Round
+Table. In these modern days he rides abroad, seeking the Graft
+instead of the Grail.
+
+Three days after Johnny's departure, two small schooners appeared
+off Coralio. After some delay a boat put off from one of them, and
+brought a sunburned young man ashore. This young man had a shrewd
+and calculating eye; and he gazed with amazement at the strange things
+that he saw. He found on the beach some one who directed him to the
+consul's office; and thither he made his way at a nervous gait.
+
+Keogh was sprawled in the official chair, drawing caricatures
+of his Uncle's head on an official pad of paper. He looked up
+at his visitor.
+
+"Where's Johnny Atwood?" inquired the sunburned young man, in
+a business tone.
+
+"Gone," said Keogh, working carefully at Uncle Sam's necktie.
+
+"That's just like him," remarked the nut-brown one, leaning against
+the table. "He always was a fellow to gallivant around instead of
+'tending to business. Will he be in soon?"
+
+"Don't think so," said Keogh, after a fair amount of deliberation.
+"I s'pose he's out at some of his tomfoolery," conjectured the
+visitor, in a tone of virtuous conviction. "Johnny never would stick
+to anything long enough to succeed. I wonder how he manages to run
+his business here, and never be 'round to look after it."
+
+"I'm looking after the business just now," admitted the pro term.
+consul.
+
+"Are you--then, say--where's the factory?"
+
+"What factory?" asked Keogh, with a mildly polite interest.
+
+"Why, the factory where they use them cockleburrs. Lord knows what
+they use 'em for, anyway! I've got the basements of both them ships
+out there loaded with 'em. I'll give you a bargain in this lot.
+I've had every man, woman and child around Dalesburg that wasn't
+busy pickin' 'em for a month. I hired these ships to bring 'em over.
+Everybody thought I was crazy. Now, you can have this lot for fifteen
+cents a pound, delivered on land. And if you want more I guess old
+Alabam' can come up to the demand. Johnny told me when he left home
+that if he struck anything down here that there was any money in he'd
+let me in on it. Shall I drive the ships in and hitch?"
+
+A look of supreme, almost incredulous, delight dawned in Keogh's
+ruddy countenance. He dropped his pencil. His eyes turned upon
+the sunburned young man with joy in them mingled with fear lest
+his ecstasy should prove a dream.
+
+"For God's sake tell me," said Keogh, earnestly, "are you Dink
+Pawson?"
+
+"My name is Pinkney Dawson," said the cornerer of the cockleburr
+market.
+
+Billy Keogh slid rapturously and gently from his chair to his favorite
+strip of matting on the floor.
+
+There were not many sounds in Coralio on that sultry afternoon. Among
+those that were may be mentioned a noise of enraptured and unrighteous
+laughter from a prostrate Irish-American, while a sunburned young man,
+with a shrewd eye, looked on him with wonder and amazement. Also the
+"tramp, tramp, tramp" of many well-shod feet in the streets outside.
+Also the lonesome wash of the waves that beat along the historic
+shores of the Spanish Main.
+
+
+
+XIV
+
+Masters of Arts
+
+A two-inch stub of a blue pencil was the wand with which Keogh
+performed the preliminary acts of his magic. So, with this he covered
+paper with diagrams and figures while he waited for the United States
+of America to send down to Coralio a successor to Atwood, resigned.
+
+The new scheme that his mind had conceived, his stout heart indorsed,
+and his blue pencil corroborated, was laid around the characteristics
+and human frailties of the new president ofAnchuria. These
+characteristics, and the situation out of which Keogh hoped to wrest
+a golden tribute, deserve chronicling contributive to the clear order
+of events.
+
+President Losada--many called him Dictator--was a man whose genius
+would have made him conspicuous even among Anglo-Saxons, had not
+that genius been intermixed with other traits that were petty and
+subversive. He had some of the lofty patriotism of Washington (the
+man he most admired), the force of Napoleon, and much of the wisdom
+of the sages. These characteristics might have justified him the
+assumption of the title of "The Illustrious Liberator," had they not
+been accompanied by a stupendous and amazing vanity that kept him
+in the less worthy ranks of the dictators.
+
+Yet he did his country great service. With a mighty grasp he shook
+it nearly free from the shackles of ignorance and sloth and the vermin
+that fed upon it, and all but made it a power in the council of
+nations. He established schools and hospitals, built roads, bridges,
+railroads and palaces, and bestowed generous subsidies upon the arts
+and sciences. He was the absolute despot and the idol of his people.
+The wealth of the country poured into his hands. Other presidents had
+been rapacious without reason. Losada amassed enormous wealth, but
+his people had their share of the benefits.
+
+The joint in his armor was his insatiate passion for monuments and
+tokens commemorating his glory. In every town he caused to be erected
+statues of himself bearing legends in praise of his greatness. In
+the walls of every public edifice, tablets were fixed reciting his
+splendor and the gratitude of his subjects. His statuettes and
+portraits were scattered throughout the land in every house and hut.
+One of the sycophants in his court painted him as St. John, with a
+halo and a train of attendants in full uniform. Losada saw nothing
+incongruous in this picture, and had it hung in a church in the
+capital. He ordered from a French sculptor a marble group including
+himself with Napoleon, Alexander the Great, and one or two others whom
+he deemed worthy of the honor.
+
+He ransacked Europe for decorations, employing policy, money and
+intrigue to cajole the orders he coveted from kings and rulers.
+On state occasions his breast was covered from shoulder to shoulder
+with crosses, stars, golden roses, medals and ribbons. It was said
+that the man who could contrive for him a new decoration, or invent
+some new method of extolling his greatness, might plunge a hand deep
+into the treasury.
+
+This was the man upon whom Billy Keogh had his eye. The gentle
+buccaneer had observed the rain of favors that fell upon those who
+ministered to the president's vanities, and he did not deem it his
+duty to hoist his umbrella against the scattering drops of liquid
+fortune.
+
+In a few weeks the new consul arrived, releasing Keogh from his
+temporary duties. He was a young man fresh from college, who lived
+for botany alone. The consulate at Coralio gave him the opportunity
+to study tropical flora. He wore smoked glasses, and carried a green
+umbrella. He filled the cool, back porch of the consulate with
+plants and specimens so that space for a bottle and chair was not
+to be found. Keogh gazed on him sadly, but without rancor, and began
+to pack his gripsack. For his new plot against stagnation along the
+Spanish Main required of him a voyage overseas.
+
+Soon came the ~Karlsefin~ again--she of the trampish habits--gleaning
+a cargo of coconuts for a speculative descent upon the New York
+market. Keogh was booked for a passage on the return trip.
+
+"Yes, I'm going to New York," he explained to the group of his
+countrymen that had gathered on the beach to see him off. "But
+I'll be back before you miss me. I've undertaken the art education
+of this piebald country, and I'm not the man to desert it while it's
+in the early throes of tintypes."
+
+With this mysterious declaration of his intentions Keogh boarded
+the ~Karlsefin~.
+
+Ten days later, shivering, with the collar of his thin coat turned
+high, he burst into the studio of Carolus White at the top of a tall
+building in Tenth Street, New York City.
+
+Carolus White was smoking a cigarette and frying sausages over an oil
+stove. He was only twenty-three, and had noble theories about art.
+
+"Billy Knight!" exclaimed White, extending the hand that was not
+busy with the frying pan. "From what part of the uncivilized world,
+I wonder!"
+
+"Hello, Carry," said Keogh, dragging forward a stool, and holding
+his fingers close to the stove. "I'm glad I found you so soon. I've
+been looking for you all day in the directories and art galleries.
+The free-lunch man on the corner told me where you were, quick.
+I was sure you'd be painting pictures yet."
+
+Keogh glanced about the studio with the shrewd eye of a connoisseur
+in business.
+
+"Yes, you can do it," he declared, with many gentle nods of his head.
+"That big one in the corner with the angels and greeh clouds and
+band-wagon is just the sort of thing we want. What would you call
+that, Carry--scene from Coney Island, ain't it?"
+
+'That," said White, "I had intended to call The Translation of
+Elijah,' but you may be nearer right than I am."
+
+"Name doesn't matter," said Keogh, largely; "it's the frame and
+the varieties of paint that does the trick. Now, I can tell you in
+a minute what I want. I've come on a little voyage of two thousand
+miles to take you in with me on a scheme. I thought of you as soon
+as the scheme showed itself to me. How would you like to go back
+with me and paint a picture? Ninety days for the trip, and five
+thousand dollars for the job."
+
+"Cereal food or hair-tonic posters?" asked White.
+
+"It isn't an ad."
+
+"What kind of a picture is it to be?"
+
+"It's a long story," said Keogh.
+
+"Go ahead with it. If you don't mind, while you talk I'll just keep
+my eye on these sausages. Let 'em get one shade deeper than a Vandyke
+brown and you spoil 'em."
+
+Keogh explained his project. They were to return to Coralio, where
+White was to pose as a distinguished American portrait painter who
+was touring in the tropics as a relaxation from his arduous and
+remunerative professional labors. It was not an unreasonable hope,
+even to those who trod in the beaten paths of business, that an artist
+with so much prestige might secure a commission to perpetuate upon
+canvas the lineaments of the president, and secure a share of the
+~pesos~ that were raining upon the caterers to his weaknesses.
+
+Keogh had set his price at ten thousand dollars. Artists had been
+paid more for portraits. He and White were to share the expenses of
+the trip, and divide the possible profits. Thus he laid the scheme
+before White, whom he had known in the West before one declared for
+Art and the other became a Bedouin.
+
+Before long the two machinators abandoned the rigor of the bare studio
+for a snug corner of a cafe. There they sat far into the night, with
+old envelopes and Keogh's stub of blue pencil between them.
+
+At twelve o'clock White doubled up in his chair, with his chin on
+his fist, and shut his eyes at the unbeautiful wall-paper.
+
+"I'll go you, Billy," he said, in the quiet tones of decision. "I've
+got two or three hundred saved up for sausages and rent; and I'll take
+the chance with you. Five thousand! It will give me two years in
+Paris and one in Italy. I'll begin to pack tomorrow."
+
+"You'll begin in ten minutes," said Keogh. "It's to-morrow now. The
+~Karlsefin~ starts back at four P.M. Come on to your painting shop,
+and I'll help you."
+
+For five months in the year Coralio is the Newport of Anchuria.
+Then only does the town possess life. From November to March it is
+practically the seat of government. The president with his official
+family sojourns there; and society follows him. The pleasure-loving
+people make the season one long holiday of amusement and rejoicing.
+~Fiestas~, balls, games, sea bathing, processions and small theatres
+contribute to their enjoyment. The famous Swiss band from the capital
+plays in the little plaza every evening, while the fourteen carriages
+and vehicles in the town circle in funereal but complacent procession.
+Indians from the interior mountains, looking like pre-historic stone
+idols, come down to peddle their handiwork in the streets. The people
+throng the narrow ways, a chattering, happy, careless stream of
+buoyant humanity. Preposterous children rigged out with the
+shortest of ballet skirts and gilt wings, howl, underfoot, among the
+effervescent crowds. Especially is the arrival of the presidential
+party, at the opening of the season, attended with pomp, show and
+patriotic demonstrations of enthusiasm and delight.
+
+When Keogh and White reached their destination, on the return trip
+of the ~Karlsefin~, the gay winter season was well begun. As they
+stepped upon the beach they could hear the band playing in the plaza.
+The village maidens, with fireflies already fixed in their dark locks,
+were gliding, barefoot and coy-eyed, along the paths. Dandies in
+white linen, swinging their canes, were beginning their seductive
+strolls. The air was full of human essence, of artificial enticement,
+of coquetry, indolence, pleasure--the man-made sense of existence.
+
+The first two or three days after their arrival were spent in
+preliminaries. Keogh escorted the artist about town, introducing
+him to the little circle of English-speaking residents and pulling
+whatever wires he could to effect the spreading of White's fame as
+a painter. And then Keogh planned a more spectacular demonstration
+of the idea he wished to keep before the public.
+
+He and White engaged rooms in the Hotel de los Extranjeros. The two
+were clad in new suits of immaculate duck, with American straw hats,
+and carried canes of remarkable uniqueness and inutility. Few
+caballeros in Coralio--even the gorgeously uniformed officers of the
+Anchurian army--were as conspicuous for ease and elegance of demeanor
+as Keogh and his friend, the great American painter, Senor White.
+
+White set up his easel on the beach and made striking sketches of the
+mountain and sea views. The native population formed at his rear in
+a vast, chattering semicircle to watch his work. Keogh, with his care
+for details, had arranged for himself a pose which he carried out with
+fidelity. His ro1e was that of friend to the great artist, a man of
+affairs and leisure. The visible emblem of his position was a pocket
+camera.
+
+"For branding the man who owns it," said he, "a genteel dilettante
+with a bank account and an easy conscience, a steam-yacht ain't in it
+with a camera. You see a man doing nothing but loafing around making
+snap-shots, and you know right away he reads up well in 'Bradstreet.'
+You notice these old millionaire boys--soon as they get through taking
+everything else in sight they go to taking photographs. People are
+more impressed by a kodak than they are by a title or a four-karat
+scarf-pin." So Keogh strolled blandly about Coralio, snapping the
+scenery and the shrinking senoritas, while White posed conspicuously
+in the higher regions of art.
+
+Two weeks after their arrival, the scheme began to bear fruit.
+An aide-de-camp of the president drove to the hotel in a dashing
+victoria. The president desired that Senor White come to the Casa
+Morena for an informal interview.
+
+Keogh gripped his pipe tightly between his teeth. "Not a cent
+less than ten thousand," he said to the artist--"remember the price.
+And in gold or its equivalent--don't let him stick you with this
+bargain-counter stuff they call money here."
+
+"Perhaps it isn't that he wants," said White.
+
+"Get out!" said Keogh, with splendid confidence. "I know what he
+wants. He wants his picture painted by the celebrated young American
+painter and filibuster now sojourning in his down-trodden country.
+Off you go."
+
+The victoria sped away with the artist. Keogh walked up and down,
+puffing great clouds of smoke from his pipe, and waited. In an hour
+the victoria swept again to the door of the hotel, deposited White,
+and vanished. The artist dashed up the stairs, three at a step.
+Keogh stopped smoking, and became a silent interrogation point.
+
+"Landed," exclaimed White, with his boyish face flushed with elation.
+"Billy, you are a wonder. He wants a picture. I'll tell you all
+about it. By Heavens! that dictator chap is a corker! He's a
+dictator clear down to his finger-ends. He's a kind of combination
+of Julius Caesar, Lucifer and Chauncey Depew done in sepia. Polite
+and grim--that's his way. The room I saw him in was about ten acres
+big, and looked like a Mississippi steamboat with its gilding and
+mirrors and white paint. He talks English better than I can ever
+hope to. The matter of the price came up. I mentioned ten thousand.
+I expected him to call the guard and have me taken out and shot.
+He didn't move an eyelash. He just waved one of his chestnut hands
+in a careless way, and said, 'Whatever you say.' I am to go back
+tomorrow and discuss with him the details of the picture."
+
+Keogh hung his head. Self-abasement was easy to read in his downcast
+countenance.
+
+"I'm failing, Carry," he said, sorrowfully. "I'm not fit to handle
+these man's-size schemes any longer. Peddling oranges in a push-cart
+is about the suitable graft for me. When I said ten thousand, I swear
+I thought I had sized up that brown man's limit to within two cents.
+He'd have melted down for fifteen thousand just as easy. Say--Carry--
+you'll see old man Keogh safe in some nice, quiet idiot asylum, won't
+you, if he makes a break like that again?"
+
+The Casa Morena, although only one story in height, was a building
+of brown stone, luxurious as a palace in its interior. It stood on
+a low hill in a walled garden of splendid tropical flora at the upper
+edge of Coralio. The next day the president's carriage came again
+for the artist. Keogh went out for a walk along the beach, where he
+and his "picture box" were now familiar sights. When he returned to
+the hotel White was sitting in a steamer-chair on the balcony.
+
+"Well," said Keogh, "did you and His Nibs decide on the kind of
+a chromo he wants?"
+
+White got up and walked back and forth on the balcony a few times.
+Then he stopped, and laughed strangely. His face was flushed, and
+his eyes were bright with a kind of angry amusement.
+
+"Look here, Billy," he said, somewhat roughly, "when you first came
+to me in my studio and mentioned a picture, I thought you wanted a
+Smashed Oats or a Hair Tonic poster painted on a range of mountains
+or the side of a continent. Well, either of those jobs would have
+been Art in its highest form compared to the one you've steered me
+against. I can't paint that picture, Billy. You've got to let me
+out. Let me try to tell you what that barbarian wants. He had it
+all planned out and even a sketch made of his idea. The old boy
+doesn't draw badly at all. But, ye goddesses of Art! listen to the
+monstrosity he expects me to paint. He wants himself in the center
+of the canvas, of course. He is to be painted as Jupiter sitting
+on Olympus, with the clouds at his feet. At one side of him stands
+George Washington, in full regimentals, with his hand on the
+president's shoulder. An angel with outstretched wings hovers
+overhead, and is placing a laurel wreath on the president's head,
+crowning him--Queen of the May, I suppose. In the background is
+to be cannon, more angels and soldiers. The man who would paint
+that picture would have to have the soul of a dog, and would deserve
+to go down into oblivion without even a tin can tied to his tail
+to sound his memory."
+
+Little beads of moisture crept out all over Billy Keogh's brow.
+The stub of his blue pencil had not figured out a contingency like
+this. The machinery of his plan had run with flattering smoothness
+until now. He dragged another chair upon the balcony, and got White
+back to his seat. He lit his pipe with apparent calm.
+
+"Now, sonny," he said, with gentle grimness, "you and me will have
+an Art to Art talk. You've got your art and I've got mine. Yours
+is the real Pierian stuff that turns up its nose at bock-beer signs
+and oleographs of the Old Mill. Mine's the art of Business.
+ This was my scheme, and it worked out like two-and-two. Paint
+that president man as Old King Cole, or Venus, or a landscape, or
+a fresco, or a bunch of lilies, or anything he thinks he looks like.
+But get the paint on the canvas and collect the spoils. You wouldn't
+throw me down, Carry, at this stage of the game. Think of that ten
+thousand."
+
+"I can't help thinking of it," said White, "and that's what hurts.
+I'm tempted to throw every ideal I ever had down in the mire, and
+steep my soul in infamy by painting that picture. That five thousand
+meant three years of foreign study to me, and I'd almost sell my soul
+for that. "
+
+"Now it ain't as bad as that," said Keogh, soothingly. "It's a
+business proposition. It's so much paint and time against money. I
+don't fall in with your idea that that picture would so everlastingly
+jolt the art side of the question. George Washington was all right,
+you know, and nobody could say a word against the angel. I don't
+think so bad of that group. If you was to give Jupiter a pair of
+epaulets and a sword, and kind of work the clouds around to look like
+a blackberry patch, it wouldn't make such a bad battle scene. Why,
+if we hadn't already settled on the price, he ought to pay an extra
+thousand for Washington, and the angel ought to raise it five
+hundred."
+
+"You don't understand, Billy," said White, with an uneasy laugh.
+"Some of us fellows who try to paint have big notions about Art.
+I wanted to paint a picture some day that people would stand before
+and forget that it was made of paint. I wanted it to creep into them
+like a bar of music and mushroom there like a soft bullet. And I
+wanted 'em to go away and ask, 'What else has he done?' And I didn't
+want 'em to find a thing; not a portrait nor a magazine cover nor an
+illustration nor a drawing of a girl--nothing but the picture. That's
+why I've lived on fried sausages, and tried to keep true to myself.
+I persuaded myself to do this portrait for the chance it might give me
+to study abroad. But this howling, screaming caricature! Good Lord!
+can't you see how it is?"
+
+"Sure," said Keogh, as tenderly as he would have spoken to a child,
+and he laid a long forefinger on White's knee. "I see. It's bad to
+have your art all slugged up like that. I know. You wanted to paint
+a big thing like the panorama of the battle of Gettysburg. But let me
+kalsomine you a little mental sketch to consider. Up to date we're
+out $385.50 on this scheme. Our capital took every cent both of us
+could raise. We've got about enough left to get back to New York on.
+I need my share of that ten thousand. I want to work a copper deal
+in Idaho, and make a hundred thousand. That's the business end of
+the thing. Come down off your art perch, Carry, and let's land that
+hatful of dollars."
+
+"Billy," said White, with an effort, "I'll try. I won't say I'll
+do it, but I'll try. I'll go at it, and put it through if I can."
+
+"That's business," said Keogh, heartily. "Good boy! Now, here's
+another thing--rush that picture--crowd it through as quick as you
+can. Get a couple of boys to help you mix the paint if necessary.
+I've picked up some pointers around town. The people here are
+beginning to get sick of Mr. President. They say he's been too free
+with concessions; and they accuse him of trying to make a dicker with
+England to sell out the country. We want that picture done and paid
+for before there's any row."
+
+In the great patio of Casa Morena, the president caused to be
+stretched a huge canvas. Under this White set up his temporary
+studio. For two hours each day the great man sat to him.
+
+White worked faithfully. But, as the work progressed, he had seasons
+of bitter scorn, of infinite self-contempt, of sullen gloom and
+sardonic gaiety. Keogh, with the patience of a great general,
+soothed, coaxed, argued--kept him at the picture.
+
+At the end of a month White announced that the picture was completed--
+Jupiter, Washington, angels, clouds, cannon and all. His face was
+pale and his mouth drawn straight when he told Keogh. He said the
+president was much pleased with it. It was to be hung in the National
+Gallery of Statesmen and Heroes. The artist had been requested to
+return to Casa Morena on the following day to receive payment. At
+the appointed time he left the hotel, silent under his friend's
+joyful talk of their success.
+
+An hour later he walked into the room where Keogh was waiting, threw
+his hat on the floor, and sat upon the table.
+
+"Billy," he said, in strained and laboring tones, "I've a little money
+out West in a small business that my brother is running. It's what
+I've been living on while I've been studying art. I'll draw out my
+share and pay you back what you've lost on this scheme."
+
+"Lost!" exclaimed Keogh, jumping up. "Didn't you get paid for
+the picture?"
+
+"Yes, I got paid," said White. "But just now there isn't any picture,
+and there isn't any pay. If you care to hear about it, here are the
+edifying details. The president and I were looking at the painting.
+His secretary brought a bank draft on New York for ten thousand
+dollars and handed it to me. The moment I touched it I went wild.
+I tore it into little pieces and threw them on the floor. A workman
+was repainting the pillars inside the ~patio~. A bucket of his paint
+happened to be convenient. I picked up his brush and slapped a quart
+of blue paint all over that ten-thousand-dollar nightmare. I bowed,
+and walked out. The president didn't move or speak. That was one
+time he was taken by surprise. It's tough on you, Billy, but I
+couldn't help it."
+
+There seemed to be excitement in Coralio. Outside there was
+a confused, rising murmur pierced by high-pitched cries. "~Bajo
+el traidor--Muerte el traidor!~" were the words they seemed
+to form.
+
+"Listen to that!" exclaimed White, bitterly; "I know that much
+Spanish. They're shouting, 'Down with the traitor!' I heard them
+before. I felt that they meant me. I was a traitor to Art.
+The picture had to go."
+
+"'Down with the blank fool' would have suited your case better,"
+said Keogh, with fiery emphasis. "You tear up ten thousand dollars
+like an old rag because the way you've spread on five dollars' worth
+of paint hurts your conscience. Next time I pick a side-partner in
+a scheme the man has got to go before a notary and swear he never
+even heard the word 'ideal' mentioned."
+
+Keogh strode from the room, white-hot. White paid little attention
+to his resentment. The scorn of Billy Keogh seemed a trifling thing
+beside the greater self-scorn he had escaped.
+
+In Coralio the excitement waxed. An outburst was imminent. The cause
+of this demonstration of displeasure was,the presence in the town of
+a big, pink-cheeked Englishman, who, it was said, was an agent of his
+government come to clinch the bargain by which the president placed
+his people in the hands of a foreign power. It was charged that not
+only had he given away priceless concessions, but that the public debt
+was to be transferred into the hands of the English, and the custom-
+houses turned over to them as a guarantee. The long-enduring people
+had determined to make their protest felt.
+
+On that night, in Coralio and in other towns, their ire found vent.
+Veiling mobs, mercurial but dangerous, roamed the streets. They
+overthrew the great bronze statue of the president that stood in
+the center of the plaza, and hacked it to shapeless pieces. They
+tore from public buildings the tablets set there proclaiming the glory
+of the "Illustrious Liberator." His pictures in the government
+offices were demolished. The mobs even attacked the Casa Morena,
+but were driven away by the military, which remained faithful to
+the executive. All the night terror reigned.
+
+The greatness of Losada was shown by the fact that by noon the next
+day order was restored and he was still absolute. He issued
+proclamations denying positively that any negotiation of any kind had
+been entered into with England. Sir Stafford Vaughn, the pink-cheeked
+Englishman, also declared in placards and in public print that his
+presence there had no international significance. He was a traveller
+without guile. In fact (so he stated), he had not even spoken with
+the president or been in his presence since his arrival.
+
+During this disturbance, White was preparing for his homeward voyage
+in the steamship that was to sail within two or three days. About
+noon, Keogh, the restless, took his camera out with the hope of
+speeding the lagging hours. The town was now as quiet as if peace
+had never departed from her perch on the red-tiled roofs.
+
+About the middle of the afternoon, Keogh hurried back to the hotel
+with something decidedly special in his air. He retired to the little
+room where he developed his pictures.
+
+Later on he came out to White on the balcony, with a luminous, grim
+predatory smile on his face.
+
+"Do you know what that is?" he asked, holding up a 4 x 5 photograph
+mounted on cardboard.
+
+"Snap-shot of a senorita sitting in the sand--alliteration
+unintentional," guessed White, lazily.
+
+ VVVV
+"Wrong," saidKeogh with shining eyes. "It's a slung-shot. It's a can
+of dynamite. It's a gold mine. It's a sight-draft on your president
+man for twenty thousand dollars--yes, sir--twenty thousand this time,
+and no spoiling the picture. No ethics of art in the way. Art! You
+with your smelly little tubes! I've got you skinned to death with
+a kodak. Take a look at that."
+
+White took the picture in his hand, and gave a long whistle.
+
+"Jove!" he exclaimed, "but wouldn't that stir up a row in town if
+you let it be seen. How in the world did you get it, Billy?"
+
+"You know that high wall around the president man's back garden?
+I was up there trying to get a bird's eye of the town. I happened to
+notice a chink in the wall where a stone and a lot of plaster had slid
+out. Thinks I, I'll take a peep through to see how Mr. President's
+cabbages are growing. The first thing I saw was him and this Sir
+Englishman sitting at a little table about twenty feet away. They
+had the table all spread over with documents, and they were hobnobbing
+over them as thick as two pirates. 'Twas a nice corner of the garden,
+all private and shady with palms and orange trees, and they had a pail
+of champagne set by handy in the grass. I knew then was the time
+for me to make my big hit in Art. So I raised the machine up to the
+crack, and pressed the button. Just as I did so them old boys shook
+hands on the deal--you see they took that way in the picture."
+
+Keogh put on his coat and hat.
+
+"What are you going to do with it?" asked White.
+
+"Me," said Keogh in a hurt tone, "why, I'm going to tie a pink ribbon
+to it and hang it on the what-not, of course. I'm surprised at you.
+But while I'm out you just try to figure out what ginger-cake
+potentate would be most likely to want to buy this work of art for
+his private collection--just to keep it out of circulation."
+
+The sunset was reddening the tops of the coconut palms when Billy
+Keogh came back from Casa Morena. He nodded to the artist's
+questioning gaze; and lay down on a cot with his hands under the back
+of his head.
+
+"I saw him. He paid the money like a little man. They didn't want
+to let me in at first. I told 'em it was important. Yes, that
+president man is on the plenty-able list. He's got a beautiful
+business system about the way he uses his brains. All I had to do
+was to hold up the photograph so he could see it, and name the price.
+He just smiled, and walked over to a safe and got the cash. Twenty
+one-thousand-dollar brand-new United States Treasury notes he laid on
+the table, like I'd pay out a dollar and a quarter. Fine notes, too
+--they crackled with a sound like burning the brush off a ten-acre
+lot."
+
+"Let's try the feel of one," said White, curiously. "I never saw
+a thousand-dollar bill." Keogh did not immediately respond.
+
+"Carry," he said, in an absent-minded way, "you think a heap of
+your art, don't you?
+
+"More," said White, frankly, "than has been for the financial good
+of my self and my friends."
+
+"I thought you were a fool the other day," went on Keogh, quietly,
+"and I'm not sure now that you wasn't. But if you was, so am I. I've
+been in some funny deals, Carry, but I've always managed to scramble
+fair, and match my brains and capital against the other fellow's.
+ But when it comes to--well, when you've got the other fellow cinched,
+and the screws on him, and he's got to put up--why, it don't strike me
+as being a man's game. They've got a name for it, you know; it's--
+confound you, don't you understand. A fellow feels--it's some thing
+like that blamed art of yours--he--well, I tore that photograph up and
+laid the pieces on that stack of money and shoved the whole business
+back across the table. 'Excuse me, Mr. Losada,' I said, 'but I guess
+I've made a mistake in the price. You get the photo for nothing.
+Now, Carry, you get out the pencil, and we'll do some more figuring.
+I'd like to save enough out of our capital for you to have some fried
+sausages in your joint when you get back to New York.
+
+
+
+XV
+
+Dickey
+
+There is little consecutiveness along the Spanish Main. Things happen
+there intermittently. Even Time seems hang his scythe daily on the
+branch of an orange tree while he takes a siesta and a cigarette.
+
+After the ineffectual revolt against the administration of President
+Losada, the country settled again into quiet toleration of the abuses
+with which he had been charged. In Coralio old political enemies went
+arm-in-arm, lightly eschewing for the time all differences of opinion.
+
+The failure of the art expedition did not stretch the cat-footed Keogh
+upon his back. The ups and downs of Fortune made smooth travelling
+for his nimble steps. His blue pencil stub was at work again before
+the smoke of the steamer on which White sailed had cleared away from
+the horizon. He had but to speak a word to Geddie to find his credit
+negotiable for whatever goods he wanted from the store of Brannigan
+& Company. On the same day on which White arrived in New York Keogh,
+at the rear of a train of five pack mules loaded with hardware and
+cutlery, set his face toward the grim, interior mountains. There
+the Indian tribes wash gold dust from the auriferous streams; and
+when a market is brought to them trading is brisk and ~muy bueno~
+in the Cordilleras.
+
+In Coralio Time folded his wings and paced wearily along his drowsy
+path. They who had most cheered the torpid hours were gone. Clancy
+had sailed on a Spanish barque for Colon, contemplating a cut across
+the isthmus and then a further voyage to end at Callao, where the
+fighting was said to be on. Geddie, whose quiet and genial nature had
+once served to mitigate the frequent dull reaction of lotus eating,
+was now a home-man, happy with his bright orchid, Paula, and never
+even dreaming of or regretting the unsolved, sealed and monogramed
+Bottle whose contents, now inconsiderable, were held safely in the
+keeping of the sea.
+
+Well may the Walrus, most discerning and eclectic of beasts, place
+sealing-wax midway on his program of topics that fall pertinent and
+diverting upon the ear.
+Atwood was gone--he of the hospitable back porch and ingenuous
+cunning. Doctor Gregg, with his trepanning story smoldering within
+him, was a whiskered volcano, always showing signs of imminent
+eruption, and was not to be considered in the ranks of those who
+might contribute to the amelioration of ennui. The new consul's note
+chimed with the sad sea waves and the violent tropical greens--he had
+not a bar of Scheherezade or of the Round Table in his lute. Goodwin
+was employed with large projects: what time he was loosed from them
+found him at his home, where he loved to be. Therefore it will be
+seen that there was a dearth of fellowship and entertainment among
+the foreign contingent of Coralio.
+
+And then Dicky Maloney dropped down from the clouds upon the town,
+and amused it.
+
+Nobody knew where Dicky Maloney hailed from or how he reached Coralio.
+He appeared there one day; and that was all. He afterward said that
+he came on the fruit steamer ~Thor~, but an inspection of the ~Thor's~
+passenger list of that date was found to be Maloneyless. Curiosity,
+however, soon perished; and Dicky took his place among the odd fish
+cast up by the Caribbean.
+
+He was an active, devil-may-care, rollicking fellow with an engaging
+gray eye, the most irresistible grin, a rather dark or much sunburned
+complexion, and a head of the fieriest red hair ever seen in that
+country. Speaking the Spanish language as well as he spoke English,
+and seeming always to have plenty of silver in his pockets, it was not
+long before he was a welcome companion whithersoever he went. He had
+an extreme fondness for ~vino blanco~, and gained the reputation of
+being able to drink more of it than any three men in town. Everybody
+called him "Dicky"; everybody cheered up at the sight of him--
+especially the natives, to whom his marvellous red hair and his free-
+and-easy style were a constant delight and envy. Wherever you went
+in the town you would soon see Dicky or hear his genial laugh, and
+find around him a group of admirers who appreciated him both for
+his good nature and the white wine he was always so ready to buy.
+
+A considerable amount of speculation was had concerning the object of
+his sojourn there, until one day he silenced this by opening a small
+shop for the sale of tobacco, ~dulces~ and the handiwork of the
+interior Indians--fibre-and-silk-woven goods, deerskin ~zapatos~ and
+basketwork of tule reeds. Even then he did not change his habits;
+for he was drinking and playing cards half the day and night with
+the ~comandante~, the collector of customs, the ~jefe politico~ and
+other gay dogs among the native officials.
+
+One day Dicky saw Pasa, the daughter of Madama Ortiz, sitting in the
+side-door of the Hotel de los Extranjeros. He stopped in his tracks,
+still, for the first time in Coralio; and then he sped, swift as
+a deer, to find Vasquez, a gilded native youth, to present him.
+
+The young men had named Pasa ~La Santita Naranjadita~." ~Naranjadita~
+is a Spanish word for a certain color that you must go to more trouble
+to describe in English. By saying "The little saint, tinted the most
+beautiful-delicate-slightly-orange-golden," you will approximate
+the description of Madama Ortiz's daughter.
+
+La Madama Ortiz sold rum in addition to other liquors. Now, you must
+know that the rum expiates whatever opprobrium attends upon the other
+commodities. For rum-making, mind you, is a government monopoly;
+and to keep a government dispensary assures respectability if not
+preeminence. Moreover, the saddest of precisians could find no fault
+with the conduct of the shop. Customers drank there in the lowest
+of spirits and fearsomely, as in the shadow of the dead for Madama's
+ancient and vaunted lineage counteracted even the rum's behest to be
+merry. For, was she not of the ~Iglesias~, who landed with Pizarro?
+And had not her deceased husband been ~comisionado de caminos y
+puentes~ for the district?
+
+In the evenings Pasa sat by the window in the room next to the one
+where they drank, and strummed dreamily upon her guitar. And then,
+by twos and threes, would come visiting young caballeros and occupy
+the prim line of chairs set against the wall of this room. They were
+there to besiege the heart of ~La Santita~." Their method (which
+is not proof against intelligent competition) consisted of expanding
+the chest, looking valorous, and consuming a gross or two of
+cigarettes. Even saints delicately oranged prefer to be wooed
+differently.
+
+Dona Pasa would tide over the vast chasms of nicotinized silence with
+music from her guitar, while she wondered if the romances she had read
+about gallant and more--more contiguous cavaliers were all lies. At
+somewhat regular intervals Madama would glide in from the dispensary
+with a sort of drought-suggesting gleam in her eye, and there would be
+a rustling of stiffly starched white trousers as one of the caballeros
+would propose an adjournment to the bar.
+
+That Dicky Maloney would, sooner or later, explore this field was
+a thing to be foreseen. There were few doors in Coralio into which
+his red head had not been poked.
+
+In an incredibly short space of time after his first sight of her
+he was there, seated close beside her rocking chair. There was no
+back-against-the-wall poses in Dicky's theory of wooing. His plan
+of subjection was an attack at close range. To carry the fortress
+with one concentrated, ardent, eloquent, irresistible ~escalade~--
+that was Dicky's way.
+
+Pasa was descended from the proudest Spanish families in the country.
+Moreover, she had had unusual advantages. Two years in a New Orleans
+school had elevated her ambitions and fitted her for a fate above
+the ordinary maidens of her native land. And yet here she succumbed
+to the first red-haired scamp with a glib tongue and a charming smile
+that came along and courted her properly.
+
+Very soon Dicky took her to the little church on the corner of the
+plaza, and "Mrs. Maloney" was added to her string of distinguished
+names.
+
+And it was her fate to sit, with her patient, saintly eyes and figure
+like a bisque Psyche, behind the sequestered counter of the little
+shop, while Dicky drank and philandered with is frivolous
+acquaintances.
+
+The women, with their naturally fine instinct, saw a chance for
+vivisection, and delicately taunted her with his habits. She turned
+upon them in a beautiful, steady blaze of sorrowful contempt.
+
+"You meat-cows," she said, in her level, crystal-clear tones; "you
+know nothing of a man. Your men are ~maromeros~. They are fit only
+to roll cigarettes in the shade until the sun strikes and shrivels
+them up. They drone in your hammocks and you comb their hair and feed
+them with fresh fruit. My man is of no such blood. Let him drink
+of the wine. When he has taken sufficient of it to drown one of your
+~flaccitos~ he will come home to me more of a man than one thousand
+of your ~pobrecitos~. My hair he smooths and braids; to me he sings;
+he himself removes my zapatos, and there, there, upon each instep
+leaves a kiss. He holds--Oh, you will never understand! Blind ones
+who have never known a ~man~."
+
+Sometimes mysterious things happened at night about Dicky's shop.
+While the front of it was dark, in the little room back of it Dicky
+and a few of his friends would sit about a table carrying on some kind
+of very quiet ~negocios~ until quite late. Finally he would let them
+out the front door very carefully, and go upstairs to his little
+saint. These visitors were generally conspirator-like men with dark
+clothes and hats. Of course, these dark things were noticed after
+a while, and talked about.
+
+Dicky seemed to care nothing at all for the society of the alien
+residents of the town. He avoided Goodwin, and his skilful escape
+from the trepanning story of Doctor Gregg is still referred to,
+in Coralio, as a masterpiece of lightning diplomacy.
+
+Many letters arrived, addressed to "Mr. Dicky Maloney," or "Senor
+Dickee Maloney," to the considerable pride of Pasa. That so many
+people should desire to write to him only confirmed her own suspicion
+that the light from his red head shone around the world. As to their
+contents she never felt curiosity. There was a wife to you!
+
+The one mistake Dicky made in Coralio was to run out of money at the
+wrong time. Where his money came from was a puzzle, for the sales
+of his shop were next to nothing, but that source failed, and at a
+peculiarly unfortunate time. It was when the ~comandante~, Don Senor
+el Coronel Encarnacion Rios, looked upon the little saint seated in
+the shop and felt his heart go pitapat.
+
+The ~comandante~, who was versed in all the intricate art of
+gallantry, first delicately hinted at his sentiments by donning his
+dress uniform and strutting up and down fiercely before her window.
+Pasa, glancing demurely with her saintly eyes, instantly perceived
+his resemblance to her parrot, Chichi, and was diverted to the extent
+of smile. The ~comandante~ saw the smile, which was not intended
+for him. Convinced of an impression made, he entered the shop,
+confidently, and advanced to open compliment. Pasa froze; he pranced;
+she flamed royally; he was charmed to injudicious persistence; she
+commanded him to leave the shop; he tried to capture her hand and--
+Dicky entered, smiling broadly, full of white wine and the devil.
+
+He spent five minutes in punishing the comandante scientifically and
+carefully, so that the pain might be prolonged as far as possible.
+At the end of that time he pitched the rash wooer out the door upon
+the stones of the street, senseless.
+
+A barefooted policeman who had been watching the affair from across
+the street blew a whistle. A squad of four soldiers came running
+from the cuartel around the corner. When they saw that the offender
+was Dicky, they stopped, and blew more whistles, which brought out
+reinforcements of eight. Deeming the odds against them sufficiently
+reduced, the military advanced upon the disturber.
+
+Dicky, being thoroughly imbued with the martial spirit, stooped and
+drew the ~comandante's~ sword, which was girded about him, and charged
+his foe. He chased the standing army four squares, playfully prodding
+its squealing rear and hacking at its ginger-colored heels.
+
+But he was not so successful with the civic authorities. Six
+muscular, nimble policemen overpowered him and conveyed him,
+triumphantly but warily, to jail. "~El Diablo Colorado~" they
+dubbed him, and derided the military for its defeat.
+
+Dicky, with the rest of the prisoners, could look out through the
+barred door at the grass of the little plaza, at a row of orange trees
+and the red tile roofs and 'dobe walls of a line of insignificant
+stores.
+
+At sunset along a path across this plaza came a melancholy procession
+of sad-faced women bearing plantains, cassava, bread and fruit--each
+coming with food to some wretch behind those bars to whom she still
+clung and furnished the means of life. Twice a day--morning and
+evening--they were permitted to come. Water was furnished to her
+compulsory guests by the republic, but no food.
+
+That evening Dicky's name was called by the sentry, and he stepped
+before the bars of the door. There stood his little saint, a black
+mantilla draped about her head and shoulders, her face like glorified
+melancholy, her clear eyes gazing longingly at him as if they might
+draw him between the bars to her. She brought a chicken, some
+oranges, dulces and a loaf of white bread. A soldier inspected
+the food, and passed it in to Dicky. Pasa spoke calmly, as she always
+did, briefly, in her thrilling, flute-like tones. "Angel of my life,"
+she said, "let it not be long that thou art away from me. Thou
+knowest that life is not a thing to be endured with thou not at
+my side. Tell me if I can do aught in this matter. If not, I will
+wait--a little while. I come again in the morning."
+
+Dicky, with his shoes removed so as not to disturb his fellow
+prisoners, tramped the floor of the jail half the night condemning
+his lack of money and the cause of it--whatever that might have been.
+He knew very well that money would have brought his release at once.
+
+For two days succeeding Pasa came at the appointed times and brought
+him food. He eagerly inquired each time if a letter or package had
+come for him, and she mournfully shook her head.
+
+On the morning of the third day she brought only a small loaf of
+bread. There were dark circles under her eyes. She seemed as calm
+as ever.
+
+"By jingo," said Dicky, who seemed to speak in English or Spanish as
+the whim seized him, "this is dry provender, ~muchachita~. Is this
+the best you can dig up for a fellow?"
+
+Pasa looked at him as a mother looks at a beloved but capricious babe.
+
+"Think better of it," she said, in a low voice; "since for the next
+meal there will be nothing. The last ~centavo~ is spent." She
+pressed closer against the grating.
+
+"Sell the goods in the shop--take anything for them."
+
+"Have I not tried? Did I not offer them for one-tenth their cost?
+Not even one ~peso~ would any one give. There is not one ~real~ in
+this town to assist Dickee Malonee."
+
+Dick clenched his teeth grimly. 'That's the ~comandante~," he growled.
+"He's responsible for that sentiment. Wait, oh, wait till the cards
+are all out."
+
+Pasa lowered her voice to almost a whisper. "And, listen, heart of
+my heart," she said, "I have endeavored to be brave, but I cannot
+live without thee. Three days now--"
+
+Dicky caught a faint gleam of steel from the folds of her mantilla.
+For once she looked in his face and saw it without a smile, stern,
+menacing and purposeful. Then he suddenly raised his hand and his
+smile came back like a gleam of sunshine. The hoarse signal of an
+incoming steamer's siren sounded in the harbor. Dicky called to
+the sentry who was pacing before the door: "What steamer comes?"
+
+"The ~Catarina~."
+
+"Of the Vesuvius line?"
+
+"Without doubt, of that line."
+
+"Go you, ~picarilla~, "said Dicky joyously to Pasa, "to the American
+consul. Tell him I wish to speak with him. See that he comes
+at once. And look you! let me see a different look in those eyes,
+for I promise your head shall rest upon this arm tonight.
+
+It was an hour before the consul came. He held his green umbrella
+under his arm, and mopped his forehead impatiently.
+
+"Now, see here, Maloney, "he began, captiously, "you fellows seem
+to think you can cut up any kind of row, and expect me to pull you out
+of it. I'm neither the War Department nor a gold mine. This country
+has its laws, you know, and there's one against pounding the senses
+out of the regular army. You Irish are forever getting into trouble.
+I don't see what I can do. Anything like tobacco, now, to make you
+comfortable--or newspapers--"
+
+"Son of Eli," interrupted Dicky, gravely, "you haven't changed
+an iota. That is almost a duplicate of the speech you made when old
+Koen's donkeys and geese got into the chapel loft, and the culprits
+wanted to hide in your room."
+
+"Oh, heavens!" exclaimed the consul, hurriedly adjusting his
+spectacles. "Are you a Yale man, too? Were you in that crowd?
+I don't seem to remember any one with red--any one named Maloney.
+ Such a lot of college men seem to have misused their advantages.
+ One of the best mathematicians of the class of '91 is selling
+lottery tickets in Belize. A Cornell man dropped off here last
+month. He was second steward on a guano boat. I'll write to
+the department if you like, Maloney. Or if there's any tobacco,
+or newspa--"
+
+'There's nothing," interrupted Dicky, shortly, "but this. You go
+tell the captain of the ~Catarina~ that Dicky Maloney wants to see
+him as soon as he can conveniently come. Tell him where I am.
+Hurry. That's all."
+
+The consul, glad to be let off so easily, hurried away. The captain
+of the ~Catarina~, a stout man, Sicilian born, soon appeared,
+shoving, with little ceremony, through the guards to the jail door.
+The Vesuvius Fruit Company had a habit of doing things that way
+in Anchuria.
+
+"I am exceeding sorry--exceeding sorry," said the captain, "to see
+this occur. I place myself at your service, Mr. Maloney. What you
+need shall be furnished. Whatever you say shall be done."
+
+Dicky looked at him unsmilingly. His red hair could not detract
+from his attitude of severe dignity as he stood, tall and calm, with
+his now grim mouth forming a horizontal line.
+
+"Captain De Lucco, I believe I still have funds in the hands of your
+company--ample and personal funds. I ordered a remittance last week.
+The money has not arrived. You know what is needed in this game.
+Money and money and more money. Why has it not been sent?"
+
+"By the ~Cristobal~," replied De Lucco, gesticulating, "it was
+despatched. Where is the ~Cristobal~? Off Cape Antonio I spoke
+her with a broken shaft. A tramp coaster was towing her back to New
+Orleans. I brought money ashore thinking your need for it might not
+withstand delay. In this envelope is one thousand dollars. There
+is more if you need it, Mr. Maloney."
+
+"For the present it will suffice," said Dicky, softening as he
+crinkled the envelope and looked down at the half-inch thickness
+of smooth, dingy bills.
+
+"The long green!" he said, gently, with a new reverence in his gaze.
+"Is there anything it will not buy, Captain?"
+
+"I had three friends," replied De Lucco, who was a bit of
+a philosopher, "who had money. One of them speculated in stocks
+and made ten million; another is in heaven, and the third married
+a poor girl whom he loved."
+
+"The answer, then," said Dicky, "is held by the Almighty, Wall
+Street, and Cupid. So, the question remains."
+
+"This," queried the captain, including Dicky's surroundings in
+a significant gesture of his hand, "is it--it is notiit is not
+connected with the business of your little shop? There is no
+failure in your plans?"
+
+"No, no," said Dicky. "This is merely the result of a little private
+affair of mine, a digression from the regular line of business.
+They say for a complete life a man must know poverty, love, and war.
+But they don't go well together, ~capitan mio~. No; there is no
+failure in my business. The little shop is doing very well."
+
+When the captain had departed Dicky called the sergeant of the jail
+squad and asked:
+
+"Am I ~preso~ by the military or by the civil authority?"
+
+"Surely there is no martial law in effect now, senor."
+
+"~Bueno~. Now go or send to the ~alcalde~, the ~Juez de la Paz~
+and the ~Jefe de los Policios~. Tell them I am prepared at once to
+satisfy the demands of justice." A folded bill of the "long green"
+slid into the sergeant's hand.
+
+Then Dicky's smile came back again, for he knew that the hours of
+his captivity were numbered; and he hummed, in time with the sentry's
+tread:
+
+ "They're hanging men and women now,
+ For lacking of the green."
+
+So, that night Dicky sat by the window of the room over his shop an
+his little saint sat close by, working at something silken and dainty.
+Dicky was thoughtful and grave. His red hair was in an unusual
+state of disorder. Pasa's fingers often ached to smooth and arrange
+it, but Dicky would never allow it. He was poring, tonight, over
+a great litter of maps and books and papers on his table until that
+perpendicular line came between his brows that always distressed Pasa.
+Presently she went and brought his hat, and stood with it until he
+looked up, inquiringly.
+
+"It is sad for you here," she explained. "Go out and drink ~vino
+blanco~. Come back when you get that smile you used to wear.
+That is what I wish to see."
+
+Dicky laughed and threw down his papers. "The ~vino blanco~ stage
+is past. It has served its turn. Perhaps, after all, there was less
+entered my mouth and more my ears than people thought. But, there
+will be no more maps or frowns tonight. I promise you that. Come."
+
+They sat upon a reed ~silleta~ at the window and watched the quivering
+gleams from the lights of the ~Catarina~ reflected in the harbor.
+
+Presently Pasa rippled out one of her infrequent chirrups of audible
+laughter.
+
+"I was thinking," she began, anticipating Dicky's question, "of
+the foolish things girls have in their minds. Because I went to
+school in the States I used to have ambitions. Nothing less than
+to be the president's wife would satisfy me. And, look, thou red
+picaroon, to what obscure fate thou hast stolen me!"
+
+"Don't give up hope," said Dicky, smiling. "More than one Irishman
+has been the ruler of a South American country. There was a dictator
+of Chili named O'Higgins. Why not a President Maloney, of Anchuria?
+Say the word, ~santita mia~, and we'll make the race."
+
+"No, no, no, thou red-haired, reckless one!" sighed Pasa; "I am
+content"--she laid her head against his arm--"here."
+
+
+
+XVI
+
+Rouge et Noir
+
+It has been indicated that disaffection followed the elevation of
+Losada to the presidency. This feeling continued to grow. Throughout
+the entire republic there seemed to be a spirit of silent, sullen
+discontent. Even the old Liberal party to which Goodwin, Zavalla and
+other patriots had lent their aid was disappointed. Losada had failed
+to become a popular idol. Fresh taxes, fresh import duties and,
+more than all, his tolerance of the outrageous oppression of citizens
+by the military had rendered him the most obnoxious president since
+the despicable Alforan. The majority of his own cabinet were out
+of sympathy with him. The army, which he had courted by giving it
+license to tyrannize, had been his main, and thus far adequate,
+support.
+
+But the most impolitic of the administration's moves had been when
+it antagonized the Vesuvius Fruit Company, an organization plying
+twelve steamers with a cash capital somewhat larger than Anchuria's
+surplus and debt combined.
+
+Reasonably, an established concern like the Vesuvius would become
+irritated at having a small, retail republic with no rating at all
+attempt to squeeze it. So, when the government proxies applied for
+a subsidy they encountered a polite refusal. The president at once
+retaliated by clapping an export duty of one ~real~ per bunch on
+bananas--a thing unprecedented in fruit-growing countries. The
+Vesuvius Company had invested large sums in wharves and plantations
+along the Anchurian coast, their agents had erected fine homes in
+the towns where they had their headquarters, and heretofore had worked
+with the republic in good-will and with advantage to both. It would
+lose an immense sum if compelled to move out. The selling price of
+bananas from Vera Cruz to Trinidad was three ~reales~ per bunch.
+This new duty of one ~real~ would have ruined the fruit growers in
+Anchuria and have seriously discommoded the Vesuvius Company had it
+declined to pay it. But for some reason, the Vesuvius continued to
+buy Anchurian fruit, paying four ~reals~ for it; and not suffering
+the growers to bear the loss.
+
+This apparent victory deceived His Excellency; and he began to hunger
+for more of it. He sent an emissary to request a conference with a
+representative of the fruit company. The Vesuvius sent Mr. Franzoni,
+a little, stout, cheerful man, always cool, and whistling airs from
+Verdi's operas. Senor Espirition, of the office of the Minister
+of Finance, attempted the sandbagging in behalf of Anchuria. The
+meeting took place in the cabin of the ~Salvador~, of the Vesuvius
+line.
+
+Senor Espirition opened negotiations by announcing that the government
+contemplated the building of a railroad to skirt the alluvial coast
+lands. After touching upon the benefits such a road would confer upon
+the interests of the Vesuvius, he reached the definite suggestion that
+a contribution to the road's expenses of, say, fifty thousand ~pesos~
+would not be more than an equivalent to benefits received.
+
+Mr. Franzoni denied that his company would receive any benefits
+from a contemplated road. As its representative he must decline
+to contribute fifty thousand ~pesos~. But he would assume
+the responsibility of offering twenty-five.
+
+Did Senor Espirition understand Senor Franzoni to mean twenty-five
+thousand ~pesos~?
+
+By no means. Twenty-five ~pesos~. And in silver, not in gold.
+
+"Your offer insults my government," cried Senor Espirition, rising,
+with indignation.
+
+"Then," said Mr. Franzoni, in warning tone, "~we will change it.~"
+
+The offer was never changed. Could Mr. Franzoni have meant the
+government?
+
+This was the state of affairs in Anchuria when the winter season
+opened at Coralio at the end of the second year of Losada's
+administration. So, when the government and society made its annual
+exodus to the seashore it was evident that the presidential advent
+would not be celebrated by unlimited rejoicing. The tenth of November
+was the day set for the entrance into Coralio of the gay company
+from the capital. A narrow-gauge railroad runs twenty miles into
+the interior from Solitas. The government party travels by carriage
+from San Mateo to this road's terminal point, and proceeds by train
+to Solitas. From here they march in grand procession to Coralio
+where, on the day of their coming, festivities and ceremonies abound.
+But this season saw an ominous dawning of the tenth of November.
+
+Although the rainy season was over, the day seemed to hark back to
+reeking June. A fine drizzle of rain fell all during the forenoon.
+The procession entered Coralio amid a strange silence.
+
+President Losada was an elderly man, grizzly bearded, with
+a considerable ratio of Indian blood revealed in his cinnamon
+complexion. His carriage headed the procession, surrounded
+and guarded by Captain Cruz and his famous troop of one hundred
+light horse "~El Ciento Huilando~." Colonel Rocas followed,
+with a regiment of the regular army.
+
+The president's sharp, beady eyes glanced about him for the expected
+demonstration of welcome; but he faced a stolid, indifferent array
+of citizens. Sightseers the Anchurians are by birth and habit, and
+they turned out to their last able-bodied unit to witness the scene;
+but they maintained an accusive silence. They crowded the streets
+to the very wheel ruts; they covered the red tile roofs to the eaves,
+but there was never a "~viva~" from them. No wreaths of palm
+and lemon branches or gorgeous strings of paper roses hung from
+the windows and balconies as was the custom. There was an apathy,
+a dull, dissenting disapprobation, that was the more ominous because
+it puzzled. No one feared an outburst, a revolt of the discontents,
+for they had no leader. The president and those loyal to him had
+never even heard whispered a name among them capable of crystallizing
+the dissatisfaction into opposition. No, there could be no danger.
+The people always procured a new idol before they destroyed an old
+one.
+
+At length, after a prodigious galloping and curvetting of red-sashed
+majors, gold-laced colonels and epauletted generals, the procession
+formed for its annual progress down the Calle Grande to the Casa
+Morena, where the ceremony of welcome to the visiting president
+always took place.
+
+The Swiss band led the line of march. After it pranced the local
+~comandante~, mounted, and a detachment of his troops. Next came
+a carriage with four members of the cabinet, conspicuous among them
+the Minister of War, old General Pilar, with his white moustache
+and his soldierly bearing. Then the president's vehicle, containing
+also the Ministers of Finance and State; and surrounded by
+Captain Cruz's light horse formed in a close double file of fours.
+Following them, the rest of the officials of state, the judges and
+distinguished military and social ornaments of public and private
+life.
+
+As the band struck up, and the movement began, like a bird of
+ill-omen the ~Valhalla~, the swiftest steamship of the Vesuvius line,
+glided into the harbor in plain view of the president and his train.
+Of course, there was nothing menacing about its arrival--a business
+firm does not go to war with a nation--but it reminded Senor
+Espirition and others in those carriages that the Vesuvius Fruit
+Company was undoubtedly carrying something up its sleeve for them.
+
+By the time the van of the procession had reached the government
+building, Captain Cronin, of the ~Valhalla~, and Mr. Vincenti,
+member of the Vesuvius Company, had landed and were pushing their
+way, bluff, hearty and nonchalant, through the crowd on the narrow
+sidewalk. Clad in white linen, big, debonair, with an air of
+good-humored authority, they made conspicuous figures among the dark
+mass of unimposing Anchurians, as they penetrated to within a few
+yards of the steps of the Casa Morena. Looking easily above
+the heads of the crowd, they perceived another that towered above
+the undersized natives. It was the fiery poll of Dicky Maloney
+against the wall close by the lower step; and his broad, seductive
+grin showed that he recognized their presence.
+
+Dicky had attired himself becomingly for the festive occasion in
+a well-fitting black suit. Pasa was close by his side, her head
+covered with the ubiquitous black mantilla. Mr. Vincenti looked
+at her attentively.
+
+"Botticelli's Madonna, he remarked, gravely. "I wonder when she
+got into the game. I don't like his getting tangled with the women.
+I hoped he would keep away from them."
+
+Captain Cronin's laugh almost drew attention from the parade.
+
+"With that head of hair! Keep away from the women! And a Maloney!
+Hasn't he got a license? But, nonsense aside, what do you think of
+the prospects? It's a species of filibustering out of my line."
+
+Vincenti glanced again at Dicky's head and smiled. "~Rouge et noir~,"
+he said. "There you have it. Make your play, gentlemen. Our money
+is on the red."
+
+"The lad's game," said Cronin, with a commending look at the tall,
+easy figure by the steps. "But 'tis all like fly-by-night theatricals
+to me. The talk's bigger than the stage; there's a smell of gasoline
+in the air, and they're their own audience and scene-shifters."
+
+They ceased talking, for General Pilar had descended from the first
+carriage and had taken his stand upon the top step of Casa Morena.
+As the oldest member of the cabinet, custom had decreed that he should
+make the address of welcome, presenting the keys of the official
+residence to the president at its close.
+
+General Pilar was one of the most distinguished citizens of the
+republic. Hero of three wars and innumerable revolutions, he was
+an honored guest at European courts and camps. An eloquent speaker
+and a friend to the people, he represented the highest type of
+the Anchurians.
+
+Holding in his hand the gilt keys of Casa Morena, he began his address
+in a historical form, touching upon each administration and the
+advance of civilization and prosperity from the first dim striving
+after liberty down to present times. Arriving at the regime of
+President Losada, at which point, according to precedent, he should
+have delivered a eulogy upon its wise conduct and the happiness of
+the people, General Pilar paused. Then he silently held up the bunch
+of keys high above his head, with his eyes closely regarding it.
+The ribbon with which they were bound fluttered in the breeze.
+
+"It still blows," cried the speaker, exultantly. "Citizens of
+Anchuria, give thanks to the saints this night that our air is
+still free."
+
+Thus disposing of Losada's administration, he abruptly reverted
+to that of Olivarra, Anchuria's most popular ruler. Olivarra had
+been assassinated nine years before while in the prime of life and
+usefulness. A faction of the Liberal party led by Losada himself
+had been accused of the deed. Whether guilty or not, it was eight
+years before the ambitious and scheming Losada had gained his goal.
+
+Upon this theme General Pilar's eloquence was loosed. He drew the
+picture of the beneficent Olivarra with a loving hand. He reminded
+the people of the peace, the security and the happiness they had
+enjoyed during that period. He recalled in vivid detail and with
+significant contrast the last winter sojourn of President Olivarra
+in Coralio, when his appearance at their fiestas was the signal
+for thundering vivas of love and approbation.
+
+The first public expression of sentiment from the people that day
+followed. A low, sustained murmur went among them like the surf
+rolling along the shore.
+
+"Ten dollars to a dinner at the Saint Charles," remarked Mr. Vincenti,
+"that rouge wins."
+
+"I never bet against my own interests," said Captain Cronin, lighting
+a cigar. "Long-winded old boy for his age. What's he talking about?"
+
+"My Spanish," replied Vincenti, "runs about ten words to the minute;
+his is something around two hundred. Whatever he s saying, he's
+getting them warmed up."
+
+"Friends and brothers," General Pilar was saying, "could I reach out
+my hand this day across the lamentable silence of the grave to
+Olivarra the Good, to the ruler who was one of you, whose tears fell
+when you sorrowed and whose smile followed your joy--I would bring him
+back to you, but--Olivarra is dead--dead at the hands of a craven
+assassin!"
+
+The speaker turned and gazed boldly into the carriage of the
+president. His arm remained extended aloft as if to sustain his
+peroration. The president was listening aghast, at this remarkable
+address of welcome. He was sunk back upon his seat, trembling with
+rage and dumb surprise, his dark hands tightly gripping the carriage
+cushions.
+
+Half rising, he extended one arm toward the speaker and shouted
+a harsh command at Captain Cruz. The leader of the "Flying Hundred"
+sat his horse, immovable, with folded arms, giving no sign of having
+heard. Losada sank back again, his dark features distinctly paling.
+
+Who says that Olivarra is dead?" suddenly cried the speaker,
+his voice, old as he was, sounding like a battle trumpet. His body
+lies in the grave, but to the people he loved he has bequeathed
+his spirit--yes, more--his learning, his courage, his kindness--yes,
+more--his youth, his image--people of Anchuria, have you forgotten
+Ramon, the son of Olivarra?"
+
+Cronin and Vincenti, watching closely, saw Dicky Maloney suddenly
+raise his hat, tear off his shock of red hair, leap up the steps
+and stand at the side of General Pilar. The Minister of War laid
+his arm across the young man's shoulders. All who had known President
+Olivarra saw again his same lion-like pose, the same frank, undaunted
+expression, the same high forehead with the peculiar line of
+the clustering, crisp black hair.
+
+General Pilar was an experienced orator. He seized the moment
+of breathless silence that preceded the storm.
+
+"Citizens of Anchuria," he trumpeted, holding aloft the keys of Casa
+Morena, "I am here to deliver these keys--the keys to your homes and
+liberty--to your chosen president. Shall I deliver them to Enrico
+Olivarra's assassin, or to his son?"
+
+"Olivarra! Olivarra!" the crowd shrieked and howled. All vociferated
+the magic name--men, women, children and the parrots.
+
+And the enthusiasm was not confined to the blood of the plebs.
+Colonel Rocas ascended the steps and laid his sword theatrically
+at young Ramon Olivarra's feet. Four members of the cabinet embraced
+him. Captain Cruz gave a command, and twenty of ~El Ciento Huilando~
+dismounted and arranged themselves in a cordon about the steps
+of Casa Morena.
+
+But Ramon Olivarra seized that moment to prove himself a born
+genius and politician. He waved those soldiers aside, and descended
+the steps to the street. There, without losing his dignity or
+the distinguished elegance that the loss of his red hair brought
+him, betook the proletariat to his bosom--the barefooted, the dirty,
+Indians, Caribs, babies, beggars, old, young, saints, soldiers
+and sinners--he missed none of them.
+
+While this act of the drama was being presented, the scene shifters
+had been busy at the duties that had been assigned to them. Two
+of Cruz's dragoons had seized the bridle reins of Losada's horses;
+others formed a close guard around the carriage; and they galloped
+off with the tyrant and his two unpopular Ministers. No doubt a place
+had been prepared for them. There are a number of well-barred stone
+apartments in Coralio.
+
+"~Rouge~ wins," said Mr. Vincenti, calmly lighting another cigar.
+
+Captain Cronin had been intently watching the vicinity of the stone
+steps for some time.
+
+"Good boy!" he exclaimed suddenly, as if relieved. "I wondered if
+he was going to forget his Kathleen Mavourneen."
+
+Young Olivarra had reascended the steps and spoken a few words to
+General Pilar. Then that distinguished veteran descended to the
+ground and approached Pasa, who still stood, wonder-eyed, where Dicky
+had left her. With his plumed hat in his hand, and his medals and
+decorations shining on his breast, the general spoke to her and gave
+her his arm, and they went up the stone steps of the Casa Morena
+together. And then Ramon Olivarra stepped forward and took both
+her hands before all the people.
+
+And while the cheering was breaking out afresh everywhere, Captain
+Cronin and Mr. Vincenti turned and walked back toward the shore where
+the gig was waiting for them.
+
+"There'll be another '~presidente proclamada~' in the morning," said
+Mr. Vincenti, musingly. "As a rule they are not as reliable as the
+elected ones, but this youngster seems to have some good stuff in him.
+He planned and maneuvered the entire campaign. Olivarra's widow,
+you know, was wealthy. After her husband was assassinated she went
+to the States, and educated her son at Yale. The Vesuvius Company
+hunted him up, and backed him in the little game."
+
+"It's a glorious thing," said Cronin, half jestingly, "to be able
+to discharge a government, and insert one of your own choosing, in
+these days."
+
+"Oh, it is only amatter of business," said Vincenti, stopping and
+offering the stump of his cigar to a monkey that swung down from
+a lime tree; "and that is what moves the world of today. That extra
+real on the price of bananas had to go. We took the shortest way
+of removing it."
+
+
+
+XVII
+
+Two Recalls
+
+There remains three duties to be performed before the curtain falls
+upon the patched comedy. Two have been promised: the third is no
+less obligatory.
+
+It was set forth in the program of this tropic vaudeville that
+it would be made known why Shorty 0'Day, of the Columbia Detective
+Agency, lost his position. Also that Smith should come again to tell
+us what mystery he followed that night on the shores of Anchuria when
+he strewed so many cigar stumps around the coconut palm during his
+lonely night vigil on the beach. These things were promised; but
+a bigger thing yet remains to be accomplished--the clearing up of a
+seeming wrong that has been done according to the array of chronicled
+facts (truthfully set forth) that have been presented. And one voice,
+speaking, shall do these three things.
+
+Two men sat on a stringer of a North River pier in the City of New
+York. A steamer from the tropics had begun to unload bananas and
+oranges on the pier. Now and then a banana or two would fall from
+an overripe bunch, and one of the two men would shamble forward,
+seize the fruit and return to share it with his companion.
+
+One of the men was in the ultimate stage of deterioration. As far as
+rain and wind and sun could wreck the garments he wore, it had been
+done. In his person the ravages of drink were as plainly visible.
+And yet, upon his high-bridged, rubicund nose was jauntily perched
+a pair of shining and flawless gold-rimmed glasses.
+
+The other man was not so far gone upon the descending Highway of the
+Incompetents. Truly, the flower of his manhood had gone to seed--seed
+that, perhaps, no soil might sprout. But there were still cross-cuts
+along where he travelled through which he might yet regain the pathway
+of usefulness without disturbing the slumbering Miracles. This man
+was short and compactly built. He had an oblique, dead eye, like
+that of a sting-ray, and the moustache of a cocktail mixer. We know
+the eye and the moustache; we know that Smith of the luxurious yacht,
+the gorgeous raiment, the mysterious mission, the magic disappearance,
+has come again, though shorn of the accessories of his former state.
+
+At his third banana, the man with the nose glasses spat it from him
+with a shudder.
+
+"Deuce take all fruit!" he remarked, in a patrician tone of disgust.
+"I lived for two years where these things grow. The memory of their
+taste lingers with you. The oranges are not so bad. Just see if you
+can gather a couple of them, O'Day, when the next broken crate comes
+up."
+
+Did you live down with the monkeys?" asked the other, made tepidly
+garrulous by the sunshine and the alleviating meal of juicy fruit.
+"I was down there, once myself. But only for a few hours. That was
+when I was with the Columbia Detective Agency. The monkey people
+did me up. I'd have my job yet if it hadn't been for them. I'll
+tell you about it.
+
+"One day the chief sent a note around to the office that read: 'Send
+O'Day here at once for a big piece of business.' I was the crack
+detective of the agency at that time. They always handed me the big
+jobs. The address the chief wrote from was down in the Wall Street
+district.
+
+"When I got there I found him in a private office with a lot of
+directors who were looking pretty fuzzy. They stated the case.
+The president of the Republic Insurance Company had skipped with
+about a tenth of a million dollars in cash. The directors wanted
+him back pretty bad, but they wanted the money worse. They said
+they needed it. They had traced the old gent's movements to where
+he boarded a tramp fruit steamer bound for South America that same
+morning with his daughter and a big gripsack--all the family
+he had.
+
+"One of the directors had his steam yacht coaled and with steam up,
+ready for a trip; and he turned her over to me, cart blongsh. In
+four hours I was on board of her, and hot on the trail of the fruit
+tub. I had a pretty good idea where old Wahrfield--that was his name,
+J. Churchill Wahrfield--would head for. At that time we had a treaty
+with about every foreign country except Belgium and that banana
+republic, Anchuria. There wasn't a photo of old Wahrfield to be
+had in New York--he had been foxy there--but I had his description.
+And besides, the lady with him would be a dead-give-away anywhere.
+She was one of the high-flyers in Society--not the kind that have
+their pictures in the Sunday papers--but the real sort that open
+chrysanthemum shows and christen battleships.
+
+"Well, sir, we never got a sight of that fruit tub on the road.
+The ocean is a pretty big place; and I guess we took different
+paths across it. But we kept going toward this Anchuria, where
+the fruiter was bound for.
+
+"We struck the monkey coast one afternoon about four. There was a
+ratty-looking steamer off shore taking on bananas. The monkeys were
+loading her up with big barges. It might be the one the old man had
+taken, and it might not. I went ashore to look around. The scenery
+was pretty good. I never saw any finer on the New York stage.
+I struck an American on shore, a big, cool chap, standing around
+with the monkeys. He showed me the consul's office. The consul was
+a nice young fellow. He said the fruiter was the ~Karlsefin~, running
+generally to New Orleans, but took her last cargo to New York. Then
+I was sure my people were on board, although everybody told me that
+no passengers had landed. I didn't think they would land until after
+dark, for they might have been shy about it on account of seeing that
+yacht of mine hanging around. So, all I had to do was to wait and nab
+'em when they came ashore. I couldn't arrest old Wahrfield without
+extradition papers, but my play was to get the cash. They generally
+give up if you strike 'em when they're tired and rattled and short
+on nerve.
+
+"After dark I sat under a coconut tree on the beach for a while,
+and then I walked around and investigated that town some, and it was
+enough to give you the lions. If a man could stay in New York and be
+honest, he'd better do it than to hit that monkey town with a million.
+
+"Dinky little mud houses; grass over your shoe tops in the streets;
+ladies in low-neck-and-short-sleeves walking around smoking cigars;
+tree-frogs rattling like a hose cart going to a ten blow; big
+mountains dropping gravel in the back yards, and the sea licking
+the paint off in front--no, sir--a man had better be in God's country
+living on free lunch than there.
+
+"The main street ran along the beach, and I walked down it, and
+then turned up a kind of lane where the houses were made of poles
+and straw. I wanted to see what the monkeys did when they weren't
+climbing coconut trees. The very first shack I looked in I saw my
+people. They must have come ashore while I was promenading. A man
+about fifty, smooth face, heavy eyebrows, dressed in black broadcloth,
+looking like he was just about to say, "Can any little boy in the
+Sunday school answer that?' He was freezing on to a grip that weighed
+like a dozen gold bricks, and a swell girl--a regular peach, with
+a Fifth Avenue cut--was sitting on a wooden chair. An old black woman
+was fixing some coffee and beans on a table. The light they had come
+from a lantern hung on a nail. I went and stood in the door, and they
+looked at me, and I said:
+
+"Mr. Wahrfield, you are my prisoner. I hope, for the lady's sake,
+you will take the matter sensibly. You know why I want you.'
+
+"'Who are you?' says the old gent.
+
+"'O'Day,' says I, 'of the Columbia Detective Agency. And now, sir,
+let me give you a piece of good advice. You go back and take your
+medicine like a man. Hand 'em back the boodle; and maybe they'll let
+you off light. Go back easy, and I'll put in a word for you. I'll
+give you five minutes to decide." I pulled out my watch and waited.
+
+"Then the young lady chipped in. She was one of the genuine
+high-steppers. You could tell by the way her clothes fit and
+the style she had that Fifth Avenue was made for her.
+
+"'Come inside,' she says. 'Don't stand in the door and disturb the
+whole street with that suit of clothes. Now, what is it you want?'
+
+"'Three minutes gone,' I said. 'I'll tell you again while the other
+two tick off.'
+
+"'You'll admit being the president of the Republic, won't you?'
+
+"'I am,' says he.
+
+
+'Well, then,' says I, 'it ought to be plain to you. Wanted, in
+New York, J. Churchill Wahrfield, president of the Republic Insurance
+Company.
+
+"'Also the funds belonging to said company, now in that grip, in
+the unlawful possession of said J. Churchill Wahrfield.'
+
+"'Oh-h-h-h!' says the young lady, as if she was thinking, 'you want
+to take us back to New York?'
+
+"'To take Mr. Wahrfield. There's no charge against you, miss.
+There'll be no objection, of course, to your returning with your
+father.'
+
+"Of a sudden the girl gave a tiny scream and grabbed the old boy
+around the neck. 'Oh, father, father!' she says, kind of contralto,
+'can this be true? Have you taken money that is not yours? Speak,
+father!' It made you shiver to hear the tremolo stop she put on her
+voice.
+
+"The old boy looked pretty bughouse when she first grappled him,
+but she went on, whispering in his ear and patting his offshoulder
+till he stood still, but sweating a little.
+
+"She got him to one side and they talked together a minute, and then
+he put on some gold eyeglasses and walked up and handed me the grip.
+
+"'Mr. Detective,' he says, talking a little broken, 'I conclude
+to return with you. I have finished to discover that life on this
+desolate and displeased coast would be worse than to die, itself.
+I will go back and hurl myself upon the mercy of the Republic Company.
+Have you brought a sheep?'
+
+"'Sheep!' says I; 'I haven't a single--'
+
+"'Ship,' cut in the young lady. 'Don't get funny. Father is of
+German birth, and doesn't speak perfect English. How did you come
+up?'
+
+"The girl was all broke up. She had a handkerchief to her face,
+and kept saying every little bit, '0h, father, father!' She walked
+up to me and laid her lily-white hand on the clothes that had pained
+her at first. I smelt a million violets. She was a lulu. I told
+her I came in a private yacht.
+
+"'Mr. O'Day,' she says. 'Oh, take us away from this horrid country
+at once. Can you! Will you! Say you will.'
+
+"'I'll try,' I said, concealing the fact that I was dying to get them
+on salt water before they could change their mind.
+
+"One thing they both kicked against was going through the town to
+the boat landing. Said they dreaded publicity, and now that they
+were going to return, they had a hope that the thing might yet be
+kept out of the papers. They swore they wouldn't go unless I got
+them out to the yacht without any one knowing it, so I agreed
+to humor them.
+
+"The sailors who rowed me ashore were playing billiards in a bar-room
+near the water, waiting for orders, and I proposed to have them take
+the boat down the beach half a mile or so, and take us up there.
+How to get them word was the question, for I couldn't leave the grip
+with the prisoner, and I couldn't take it with me, not knowing but
+what the monkeys might stick me up.
+
+"The young lady says the old colored woman would take them a note.
+I sat down and wrote it, and gave it to the dame with plain directions
+what to do, and she grins like a baboon and shakes her head.
+
+"Then Mr. Wahrfield handed her a string of foreign dialect, and she
+nods her head and says, 'See, senor' maybe fifty times, and lights
+out with the note.
+
+"'0ld Augusta only understands German,' said Miss Wahrfield, smiling
+at me. 'We stopped in her house to ask where we could find lodging,
+and she insisted upon our having coffee. She tells us she was raised
+in a German family in San Domingo.'
+
+"'Very likely,' I said. 'But you can search me for German words,
+except ~nix verstay~ and ~noch einst~, I would have called that
+"See, senor" French, though, on a gamble.'
+
+"Well, we three made a sneak around the edge of town so as not to
+be seen. We got tangled in vines and ferns and the banana bushes
+and tropical scenery a good deal. The monkey suburbs was as wild
+as places in Central Park. We came out on the beach a good half
+mile below. A brown chap was lying asleep under a coconut tree,
+with a ten-foot musket beside him. Mr. Wahrfield takes up the gun
+and pitches it into the sea. 'The coast is guarded,' he says.
+'Rebellion and plots ripen like fruit.' He pointed to the sleeping
+man, who never stirred. 'Thus,' he says, 'they perform trusts.
+Children!'
+
+"I saw our boat coming, and I struck a match and lit a piece of
+newspaper to show them where we were. In thirty minutes we were
+on board the yacht.
+
+"The first thing, Mr. Wahrfield and his daughter and I took the grip
+into the owner's cabin, opened it up, and took an inventory. There
+was one hundred and five thousand dollars. United States treasury
+notes in it, besides a lot of diamond jewelry and a couple of hundred
+Havana cigars. I gave the old man the cigars and a receipt for the
+rest of the lot, as agent for the company, and locked the stuff up
+in my private quarters.
+
+"I never had a pleasanter trip than that one. After we got to sea
+the young lady turned out to be the jolliest ever. The very first
+time we sat down to dinner, and the steward filled her glass with
+champagne--that director's yacht was a regular floating Waldorf-
+Astoria--she winks at me and says, 'What's the use to borrow trouble,
+Mr. Fly Cop? Here's hoping you may live to eat the hen that scratches
+on your grave.' There was a piano on board, and she sat down to it
+and sung better than you give up two cases to hear plenty times. She
+knew about nine operas clean through. She was sure enough ~bon ton~
+and swell. She wasn't one of the 'among others present' kind; she
+belonged on the special mention list!
+
+"The old man, too, perked up amazingly on the way. He passed the
+cigars, and says to me once, quite chipper, out of a cloud of smoke,
+'Mr. O'Day, somehow I think the Republic Company will not give me
+the much trouble. Guard well the gripvalise of the money, Mr. O'Day,
+for that it must be returned to them that it belongs when we finish
+to arrive.'
+
+"When we landed in New York I 'phoned to the chief to meet us in
+that director's office. We got in a cab and went there. I carried
+the grip, and we walked in, and I was pleased to see that the chief
+had got together that same old crowd of moneybugs with pink faces
+and white vests to see us march in. I set the grip on the table.
+'There's the money,' I said.
+
+"'And your prisoner?' said the chief.
+
+"I pointed to Mr. Wahrfield, and he stepped forward and says:
+
+"'The honor of a word with you, sir, to explain.'
+
+"He and the chief went into another room and stayed ten minutes.
+When they came back the chief looked as black as a ton of coal.
+
+"'Did this gentleman,' he says to me, 'have this valise in
+his possession when you first saw him?'
+
+"'He did,' said I.
+
+"The chief took up the grip and handed it to the prisoner with
+a bow, and says to the director crowd: 'Do any of you recognize
+this gentleman?'
+
+"They all shook their pink faces.
+
+"'Allow me to present,' he goes on, 'Senor Miraflores, president
+of the republic of Anchuria. The senor has generously consented
+to overlook this outrageous blunder, on condition that we undertake
+to secure him against the annoyance of public comment. It is a
+concession on his part to overlook an insult for which he might
+claim international redress. I think we can gratefully promise him
+secrecy in the matter.'
+
+"They gave him a pink nod all round.
+
+"'O'Day,' he says to me. 'As a private detective you're wasted.
+In a war, where kidnapping governments is in the rules, you'd be
+invaluable. Come down to the office at eleven.'
+
+"I knew what that meant.
+
+"'So that's the president of the monkeys,' says I. 'Well,
+why couldn't he have said so?'
+
+"Wouldn't it jar you?"
+
+
+
+XVIII
+
+The Vitagraphoscope
+
+Vaudeville is intrinsically episodic and discontinuous. Its audiences
+do not demand denouements. Sufficient unto each "turn" is the evil
+thereof. No one cares how many romances the singing comedienne may
+have had if she can capably sustain the limelight and a high note or
+two. The audiences reck not if the performing dogs get to the pound
+the moment they have jumped through their last hoop. They do not
+desire bulletins about the possible injuries received by the comic
+cyclist who retires head-first from the stage in a crash of (property)
+china-ware. Neither do they consider that their seat coupons entitle
+them to be instructed whether or no there is a sentiment between the
+lady solo banjoist and the Irish monologist.
+
+Therefore let us have no lifting of the curtain upon a tableau of
+the united lovers, backgrounded by defeated villainy and derogated
+by the comic, osculating maid and butler, thrown in as a sop to
+the Cerberi of the fifty-cent seats.
+
+But our program ends with a brief "turn" or two; and then to the
+exits. Whoever sits the show out may find, if he will, the slender
+thread that binds together, though ever so slightly, the story that,
+perhaps, only the Walrus will understand.
+
+
+~Extracts from a letter from the first vice-president of the Republic
+Insurance Company, of New York City, to Frank Goodwin, of Coralio,
+Republic of Anchuria.~
+
+~My Dear Mr. Goodwin:~--Your communication per Messrs. Howland and
+Fourchet, of New Orleans, has reached us. Also their draft on N.Y.
+for $100,000, the amount abstracted from the funds of this company
+by the late J. Churchill Wahrfield, its former president.... The
+officers and directors unite in requesting me to express to you their
+sincere esteem and thanks for your prompt and much appreciated return
+of the entire missing sum within two weeks from the time of its
+disappearance.... Can assure you that the matter will not be allowed
+to receive the least publicity.... Regret exceedingly the distressing
+death of Mr. Wahrfield by his own hand, but... Congratulations on your
+marriage to Miss Wahrfield... many charms, winning manners, noble and
+womanly nature and envied position in the best metropolitan
+society....
+
+~Cordially yours,
+Lucius E. Applegate,~
+FIRST VICE-PRESIDENT THE REPUBLIC INSURANCE
+COMPANY.
+
+
+
+~The Vitagraphoscope~
+(Moving Pictures)
+~The Last Sausage~
+
+SCENE--An Artist's Studio. The artist, a young man of prepossessing
+appearance, sits in a dejected attitude, amid a litter of sketches,
+with his head resting upon his hand. An oil stove stands on a pine
+box in the center of the studio. The artist rises, tightens his waist
+belt to another hole, and lights the stove. He goes to a tin bread
+box, half-hidden by a screen, takes out a solitary link of sausage,
+turns the box upside-down to show that there is no more, and chucks
+the sausage into a frying-pan, which he sets upon the stove.
+The flame of the stove goes out, showing that there is no more oil.
+The artist, in evident despair, seizes the sausage, in a sudden access
+of rage, and hurls it violently from him. At the same time a door
+opens, and a man who enters receives the sausage forcibly against
+his nose. He seems to cry out; and is observed to make a dance step
+or two, vigorously. The newcomer is a ruddy-faced, active, keen-
+looking man, apparently of Irish ancestry. Next he is observed
+to laugh immoderately; he kicks over the stove; he claps the artist
+(who is vainly striving to grasp his hand) vehemently upon the back.
+Then he goes through a pantomime which to the sufficiently intelligent
+spectator reveals that he has acquired large sums of money by trading
+pot-metal hatchets and razors to the Indians of the Cordillera
+Mountains for gold dust. He draws a roll of money as large as
+a small loaf of bread from his pocket, and waves it above his head,
+while at the same time he makes pantomime of drinking from a glass.
+The artist hurriedly secures his hat, and the two leave the studio
+together.
+
+
+~The Writing on the Sands~
+
+SCENE--The Beach at Nice. A woman, beautiful, still young,
+exquisitely clothed, complacent, poised, reclines near the water,
+idly scrawling letters in the sand with the staff of her silken
+parasol. The beauty of her face is audacious; her languid pose
+is one that you feel to be impermanent--you wait, expectant, for her
+to spring or glide or crawl, like a panther that has unaccountably
+become stock-still. She idly scrawls in the sand; and the word that
+she always writes is "Isabel." A man sits a few yards away. You can
+see that they are companions, ever if no longer comrades. His face
+is dark and smooth, and almost inscrutable--but not quite. The two
+speak little together. The man also scratches on the sand with his
+cane. And the word that he writes is "Anchuria." And then he looks
+out where the Mediterranean and the sky intermingle with death in
+his gaze.
+
+
+~The Wilderness and Thou~
+
+SCENE--~The Borders of a Gentleman's Estate in a Tropical Land.~
+An old Indian, with a mahogany-colored face, is trimming the grass
+on a grave by a mangrove swamp. Presently he rises to his feet and
+walks slowly toward a grove that is shaded by the gathering, brief
+twilight. In the edge of the grove stands a man who is stalwart,
+with a kind and courteous air, and a woman of a serene and clear-cut
+loveliness. When the old Indian comes up to them the man drops money
+in his hand. The grave-tender, with the stolid pride of his race,
+takes it as his due, and goes his way. The two in the edge of
+the grove turn back along the dim pathway, and walk close, close--
+for, after all, what is the world at its best but a little round
+field of the moving pictures with two walking together in it?
+
+CURTAIN
+
+
+
+
+
+End of The Project Gutenberg Etext of Cabbages and Kings, by O Henry
+
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