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diff --git a/877-0.txt b/877-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6e77e8a --- /dev/null +++ b/877-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,876 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of Little Britain, by Washington Irving + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Little Britain + +Author: Washington Irving + +Release Date: April, 1997 [Etext #877] +Posting Date: July 9, 2009 +Last Updated: September 14, 2016 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: UTF-8 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LITTLE BRITAIN *** + + + + +Produced by Anthony J. Adam and David Widger + + + + + + + + + +LITTLE BRITAIN + +By Washington Irving + + + What I write is most true... I have a whole booke of cases + lying by me which if I should sette foorth, some grave + auntients (within the hearing of Bow bell) would be out of + charity with me.--NASHE. + + +In the centre of the great city of London lies a small neighborhood, +consisting of a cluster of narrow streets and courts, of very venerable +and debilitated houses, which goes by the name of LITTLE BRITAIN. Christ +Church School and St. Bartholomew’s Hospital bound it on the west; +Smithfield and Long Lane on the north; Aldersgate Street, like an arm +of the sea, divides it from the eastern part of the city; whilst the +yawning gulf of Bull-and-Mouth Street separates it from Butcher Lane, +and the regions of Newgate. Over this little territory, thus bounded and +designated, the great dome of St. Paul’s, swelling above the intervening +houses of Paternoster Row, Amen Corner, and Ave Maria Lane, looks down +with an air of motherly protection. + +This quarter derives its appellation from having been, in ancient times, +the residence of the Dukes of Brittany. As London increased, however, +rank and fashion rolled off to the west, and trade, creeping on at their +heels, took possession of their deserted abodes. For some time Little +Britain became the great mart of learning, and was peopled by the busy +and prolific race of booksellers; these also gradually deserted it, and, +emigrating beyond the great strait of Newgate Street, settled down +in Paternoster Row and St. Paul’s Churchyard, where they continue to +increase and multiply even at the present day. + +But though thus falling into decline, Little Britain still bears traces +of its former splendor. There are several houses ready to tumble down, +the fronts of which are magnificently enriched with old oaken carvings +of hideous faces, unknown birds, beasts, and fishes; and fruits and +flowers which it would perplex a naturalist to classify. There are also, +in Aldersgate Street, certain remains of what were once spacious and +lordly family mansions, but which have in latter days been subdivided +into several tenements. Here may often be found the family of a petty +tradesman, with its trumpery furniture, burrowing among the relics of +antiquated finery, in great, rambling, time-stained apartments, with +fretted ceilings, gilded cornices, and enormous marble fireplaces. The +lanes and courts also contain many smaller houses, not on so grand a +scale, but, like your small ancient gentry, sturdily maintaining their +claims to equal antiquity. These have their gable ends to the street; +great bow-windows, with diamond panes set in lead, grotesque carvings, +and low arched door-ways. + +In this most venerable and sheltered little nest have I passed several +quiet years of existence, comfortably lodged in the second floor of +one of the smallest but oldest edifices. My sitting-room is an old +wainscoted chamber, with small panels, and set off with a miscellaneous +array of furniture. I have a particular respect for three or four +high-backed claw-footed chairs, covered with tarnished brocade, which +bear the marks of having seen better days, and have doubtless figured +in some of the old palaces of Little Britain. They seem to me to +keep together, and to look down with sovereign contempt upon their +leathern-bottomed neighbors: as I have seen decayed gentry carry a +high head among the plebeian society with which they were reduced +to associate. The whole front of my sitting-room is taken up with a +bow-window, on the panes of which are recorded the names of previous +occupants for many generations, mingled with scraps of very indifferent +gentlemanlike poetry, written in characters which I can scarcely +decipher, and which extol the charms of many a beauty of Little Britain +who has long, long since bloomed, faded, and passed away. As I am an +idle personage, with no apparent occupation, and pay my bill regularly +every week, I am looked upon as the only independent gentleman of +the neighborhood; and, being curious to learn the internal state of a +community so apparently shut up within itself, I have managed to work my +way into all the concerns and secrets of the place. + +Little Britain may truly be called the heart’s core of the city; the +stronghold of true John Bullism. It is a fragment of London as it was in +its better days, with its antiquated folks and fashions. Here flourish +in great preservation many of the holiday games and customs of yore. +The inhabitants most religiously eat pancakes on Shrove Tuesday, +hot-cross-buns on Good Friday, and roast goose at Michaelmas; they send +love-letters on Valentine’s Day, burn the pope on the fifth of November, +and kiss all the girls under the mistletoe at Christmas. Roast beef and +plum pudding are also held in superstitious veneration, and port and +sherry maintain their grounds as the only true English wines; all others +being considered vile, outlandish beverages. + +Little Britain has its long catalogue of city wonders, which its +inhabitants consider the wonders of the world: such as the great bell +of St. Paul’s, which sours all the beer when it tolls; the figures that +strike the hours at St. Dunstan’s clock; the Monument; the lions in the +Tower; and the wooden giants in Guildhall. They still believe in dreams +and fortune-telling, and an old woman that lives in Bull-and-Mouth +Street makes a tolerable subsistence by detecting stolen goods, +and promising the girls good husbands. They are apt to be rendered +uncomfortable by comets and eclipses; and if a dog howls dolefully at +night, it is looked upon as a sure sign of a death in the place. There +are even many ghost stories current, particularly concerning the old +mansion-houses; in several of which it is said strange sights are +sometimes seen. Lords and ladies, the former in full bottomed wigs, +hanging sleeves, and swords, the latter in lappets, stays, hoops and +brocade, have been seen walking up and down the great waste chambers, +on moonlight nights; and are supposed to be the shades of the ancient +proprietors in their court-dresses. + +Little Britain has likewise its sages and great men. One of the most +important of the former is a tall, dry old gentleman, of the name +of Skryme, who keeps a small apothecary’s shop. He has a cadaverous +countenance, full of cavities and projections; with a brown circle round +each eye, like a pair of horned spectacles. He is much thought of by the +old women, who consider him a kind of conjurer, because he has two of +three stuffed alligators hanging up in his shop, and several snakes in +bottles. He is a great reader of almanacs and newspapers, and is much +given to pore over alarming accounts of plots, conspiracies, fires, +earthquakes, and volcanic eruptions; which last phenomena he considers +as signs of the times. He has always some dismal tale of the kind to +deal out to his customers, with their doses; and thus at the same time +puts both soul and body into an uproar. He is a great believer in omens +and predictions; and has the prophecies of Robert Nixon and Mother +Shipton by heart. No man can make so much out of an eclipse, or even +an unusually dark day; and he shook the tail of the last comet over the +heads of his customers and disciples until they were nearly frightened +out of their wits. He has lately got hold of a popular legend or +prophecy, on which he has been unusually eloquent. There has been a +saying current among the ancient sibyls, who treasure up these things, +that when the grasshopper on the top of the Exchange shook hands with +the dragon on the top of Bow Church Steeple, fearful events would take +place. This strange conjunction, it seems, has as strangely come to +pass. The same architect has been engaged lately on the repairs of the +cupola of the Exchange, and the steeple of Bow church; and, fearful to +relate, the dragon and the grasshopper actually lie, cheek by jole, in +the yard of his workshop. + +“Others,” as Mr. Skryme is accustomed to say, “may go star-gazing, and +look for conjunctions in the heavens, but here is a conjunction on the +earth, near at home, and under our own eyes, which surpasses all +the signs and calculations of astrologers.” Since these portentous +weathercocks have thus laid their heads together, wonderful events had +already occurred. The good old king, notwithstanding that he had lived +eighty-two years, had all at once given up the ghost; another king had +mounted the throne; a royal duke had died suddenly,--another, in France, +had been murdered; there had been radical meetings in all parts of the +kingdom; the bloody scenes at Manchester; the great plot of Cato Street; +and above all, the queen had returned to England! All these sinister +events are recounted by Mr. Skryme, with a mysterious look, and a dismal +shake of the head; and being taken with his drugs, and associated in the +minds of his auditors with stuffed sea-monsters, bottled serpents, and +his own visage, which is a title-page of tribulation, they have spread +great gloom through the minds of the people of Little Britain. They +shake their heads whenever they go by Bow Church, and observe, that they +never expected any good to come of taking down that steeple, which in +old times told nothing but glad tidings, as the history of Whittington +and his Cat bears witness. + +The rival oracle of Little Britain is a substantial cheesemonger, +who lives in a fragment of one of the old family mansions, and is as +magnificently lodged as a round-bellied mite in the midst of one of his +own Cheshires. Indeed, he is a man of no little standing and importance; +and his renown extends through Huggin Lane, and Lad Lane, and even unto +Aldermanbury. His opinion is very much taken in affairs of state, having +read the Sunday papers for the last half century, together with the +“Gentleman’s Magazine,” Rapin’s “History of England,” and the “Naval +Chronicle.” His head is stored with invaluable maxims which have borne +the test of time and use for centuries. It is his firm opinion that +“it is a moral impossible,” so long as England is true to herself, that +anything can shake her; and he has much to say on the subject of the +national debt, which, somehow or other, he proves to be a great national +bulwark and blessing. He passed the greater part of his life in the +purlieus of Little Britain, until of late years, when, having become +rich, and grown into the dignity of a Sunday cane, he begins to take his +pleasure and see the world. He has therefore made several excursions to +Hampstead, Highgate, and other neighboring towns, where he has +passed whole afternoons in looking back upon the metropolis through a +telescope, and endeavoring to descry the steeple of St. Bartholomew’s. +Not a stage-coachman of Bull-and-Mouth Street but touches his hat as he +passes; and he is considered quite a patron at the coach-office of the +Goose and Gridiron, St. Paul’s churchyard. His family have been very +urgent for him to make an expedition to Margate, but he has great doubts +of those new gimcracks, the steamboats, and indeed thinks himself too +advanced in life to undertake sea-voyages. + +Little Britain has occasionally its factions and divisions, and party +spirit ran very high at one time in consequence of two rival “Burial +Societies” being set up in the place. One held its meeting at the Swan +and Horse Shoe, and was patronized by the cheesemonger; the other at the +Cock and Crown, under the auspices of the apothecary; it is needless to +say that the latter was the most flourishing. I have passed an evening +or two at each, and have acquired much valuable information, as to +the best mode of being buried, the comparative merits of churchyards, +together with divers hints on the subject of patent-iron coffins. I have +heard the question discussed in all its bearings as to the legality +of prohibiting the latter on account of their durability. The feuds +occasioned by these societies have happily died of late; but they were +for a long time prevailing themes of controversy, the people of Little +Britain being extremely solicitous of funereal honors and of lying +comfortably in their graves. + +Besides these two funeral societies there is a third of quite a +different cast, which tends to throw the sunshine of good-humor over +the whole neighborhood. It meets once a week at a little old-fashioned +house, kept by a jolly publican of the name of Wagstaff, and bearing for +insignia a resplendent half-moon, with a most seductive bunch of grapes. +The old edifice is covered with inscriptions to catch the eye of the +thirsty wayfarer, such as “Truman, Hanbury, and Co.’s Entire,” “Wine, +Rum, and Brandy Vaults,” “Old Tom, Rum and Compounds, etc.” This indeed +has been a temple of Bacchus and Momus from time immemorial. It ha +always been in the family of the Wagstaffs, so that its history is +tolerably preserved by the present landlord. It was much frequented by +the gallants and cavalieros of the reign of Elizabeth, and was looked +into now and then by the wits of Charles the Second’s day. But what +Wagstaff principally prides himself upon is, that Henry the Eighth, in +one of his nocturnal rambles, broke the head of one of his ancestors +with his famous walking-staff. This, however, is considered as a rather +dubious and vainglorious boast of the landlord. + +The club which now holds its weekly sessions here goes by the name of +“The Roaring Lads of Little Britain.” They abound in old catches, glees, +and choice stories, that are traditional in the place, and not to be met +with in any other part of the metropolis. There is a madcap undertaker +who is inimitable at a merry song; but the life of the club, and +indeed the prime wit of Little Britain, is bully Wagstaff himself. His +ancestors were all wags before him, and he has inherited with the inn +a large stock of songs and jokes, which go with it from generation to +generation as heirlooms. He is a dapper little fellow, with bandy legs +and pot belly, a red face, with a moist, merry eye, and a little shock +of gray hair behind. At the opening of every club night he is called +in to sing his “Confession of Faith,” which is the famous old drinking +trowl from “Gammer Gurton’s Needle.” He sings it, to be sure, with many +variations, as he received it from his father’s lips; for it has been a +standing favorite at the Half-Moon and Bunch of Grapes ever since it was +written; nay, he affirms that his predecessors have often had the honor +of singing it before the nobility and gentry at Christmas mummeries, +when Little Britain was in all its glory. + +It would do one’s heart good to hear, on a club night, the shouts of +merriment, the snatches of song, and now and then the choral bursts of +half a dozen discordant voices, which issue from this jovial mansion. At +such times the street is lined with listeners, who enjoy a delight +equal to that of gazing into a confectioner’s window, or snuffing up the +steams of a cookshop. + +There are two annual events which produce great stir and sensation in +Little Britain; these are St. Bartholomew’s Fair, and the Lord Mayor’s +Day. During the time of the fair, which is held in the adjoining regions +of Smithfield, there is nothing going on but gossiping and gadding +about. The late quiet streets of Little Britain are overrun with an +irruption of strange figures and faces; every tavern is a scene of rout +and revel. The fiddle and the song are heard from the tap-room, morning, +noon, and night; and at each window may be seen some group of boon +companions, with half-shut eyes, hats on one side, pipe in mouth, and +tankard in hand, fondling, and prosing, and singing maudlin songs over +their liquor. Even the sober decorum of private families, which I must +say is rigidly kept up at other times among my neighbors, is no proof +against this Saturnalia. There is no such thing as keeping maid-servants +within doors. Their brains are absolutely set madding with Punch and +the Puppet Show; the Flying Horses; Signior Polito; the Fire-Eater; the +celebrated Mr. Paap; and the Irish Giant. The children, too, lavish all +their holiday money in toys and gilt gingerbread, and fill the house +with the Lilliputian din of drums, trumpets, and penny whistles. + +But the Lord mayor’s Day is the great anniversary. The Lord Mayor +is looked up to by the inhabitants of Little Britain as the greatest +potentate upon earth; his gilt coach with six horses as the summit of +human splendor; and his procession, with all the Sheriffs and Aldermen +in his train, as the grandest of earthly pageants. How they exult in +the idea that the King himself dare not enter the city without first +knocking at the gate of Temple Bar, and asking permission of the Lord +Mayor: for if he did, heaven and earth! there is no knowing what might +be the consequence. The man in armor, who rides before the Lord mayor, +and is the city champion, has orders to cut down everybody that offends +against the dignity of the city; and then there is the little man with a +velvet porringer on his head, who sits at the window of the state-coach, +and holds the city sword, as long as a pike-staff--Odd’s blood! If he +once draws that sword, Majesty itself is not safe! + +Under the protection of this mighty potentate, therefore, the good +people of Little Britain sleep in peace. Temple Bar is an effectual +barrier against all interior foes; and as to foreign invasion, the Lord +Mayor has but to throw himself into the Tower, call in the trainbands, +and put the standing army of Beef-eaters under arms, and he may bid +defiance to the world! + +Thus wrapped up in its own concerns, its own habits, and its own +opinions, Little Britain has long flourished as a sound heart to this +great fungous metropolis. I have pleased myself with considering it as +a chosen spot, where the principles of sturdy John Bullism were garnered +up, like seed corn, to renew the national character, when it had run +to waste and degeneracy. I have rejoiced also in the general spirit of +harmony that prevailed throughout it; for though there might now +and then be a few clashes of opinion between the adherents of the +cheesemonger and the apothecary, and an occasional feud between the +burial societies, yet these were but transient clouds, and soon passed +away. The neighbors met with good-will, parted with a shake of the hand, +and never abused each other except behind their backs. + +I could give rare descriptions of snug junketing parties at which I +have been present; where we played at All-fours, Pope-Joan, +Tome-come-tickle-me, and other choice old games; and where we sometimes +had a good old English country dance to the tune of Sir Roger de +Coverley. Once a year, also, the neighbors would gather together, and +go on a gypsy party to Epping Forest. It would have done any man’s heart +good to see the merriment that took place here as we banqueted on +the grass under the trees. How we made the woods ring with bursts of +laughter at the songs of little Wagstaff and the merry undertaker! +After dinner, too, the young folks would play at blind-man’s-buff and +hide-and-seek; and it was amusing to see them tangled among the briers, +and to hear a fine romping girl now and then squeak from among the +bushes. The elder folks would gather round the cheesemonger and the +apothecary to hear them talk politics; for they generally brought out a +newspaper in their pockets, to pass away time in the country. They +would now and then, to be sure, get a little warm in argument; but +their disputes were always adjusted by reference to a worthy old +umbrella-maker, in a double chin, who, never exactly comprehending the +subject, managed somehow or other to decide in favor of both parties. + +All empires, however, says some philosopher or historian, are doomed to +changes and revolutions. Luxury and innovation creep in; factions arise; +and families now and then spring up, whose ambition and intrigues +throw the whole system into confusion. Thus in latter days has the +tranquillity of Little Britain been grievously disturbed, and its golden +simplicity of manners threatened with total subversion by the aspiring +family of a retired butcher. + +The family of the Lambs had long been among the most thriving and +popular in the neighborhood; the Miss Lambs were the belles of Little +Britain, and everybody was pleased when Old Lamb had made money enough +to shut up shop, and put his name on a brass plate on his door. In an +evil hour, however, one of the Miss Lambs had the honor of being a lady +in attendance on the Lady Mayoress, at her grand annual ball, on which +occasion she wore three towering ostrich feathers on her head. The +family never got over it; they were immediately smitten with a passion +for high life; set up a one-horse carriage, put a bit of gold lace round +the errand boy’s hat, and have been the talk and detestation of the +whole neighborhood ever since. They could no longer be induced to +play at Pope-Joan or blindman’s-buff; they could endure no dances but +quadrilles, which nobody had ever heard of in Little Britain; and they +took to reading novels, talking bad French, and playing upon the piano. +Their brother, too, who had been articled to an attorney, set up for a +dandy and a critic, characters hitherto unknown in these parts; and +he confounded the worthy folks exceedingly by talking about Kean, the +opera, and the “Edinburgh Review.” + +What was still worse, the Lambs gave a grand ball, to which they +neglected to invite any of their old neighbors; but they had a great +deal of genteel company from Theobald’s Road, Red-Lion Square, and other +parts towards the west. There were several beaux of their brother’s +acquaintance from Gray’s Inn Lane and Hatton Garden; and not less +than three Aldermen’s ladies with their daughters. This was not to be +forgotten or forgiven. All Little Britain was in an uproar with the +smacking of whips, the lashing of miserable horses, and the rattling and +the jingling of hackney coaches. The gossips of the neighborhood might +be seen popping their nightcaps out at every window, watching the crazy +vehicles rumble by; and there was a knot of virulent old cronies, that +kept a lookout from a house just opposite the retired butcher’s, and +scanned and criticised every one that knocked at the door. + +This dance was a cause of almost open war, and the whole neighborhood +declared they would have nothing more to say to the Lambs. It is +true that Mrs. Lamb, when she had no engagements with her quality +acquaintance, would give little humdrum tea-junketings to some of her +old cronies, “quite,” as she would say, “in a friendly way;” and it is +equally true that her invitations were always accepted, in spite of all +previous vows to the contrary. Nay, the good ladies would sit and be +delighted with the music of the Miss Lambs, who would condescend to +strum an Irish melody for them on the piano; and they would listen +with wonderful interest to Mrs. Lamb’s anecdotes of Alderman Plunket’s +family, of Portsokenward, and the Miss Timberlakes, the rich heiresses +of Crutched-Friars; but then they relieved their consciences, and +averted the reproaches of their confederates, by canvassing at the next +gossiping convocation everything that had passed, and pulling the Lambs +and their rout all to pieces. + +The only one of the family that could not be made fashionable was the +retired butcher himself. Honest Lamb, in spite of the meekness of his +name, was a rough, hearty old fellow, with the voice of a lion, a head +of black hair like a shoe-brush, and a broad face mottled like his own +beef. It was in vain that the daughters always spoke of him as “the old +gentleman,” addressed him as “papa,” in tones of infinite softness, +and endeavored to coax him into a dressing-gown and slippers, and other +gentlemanly habits. Do what they might, there was no keeping down the +butcher. His sturdy nature would break through all their glozings. He +had a hearty vulgar good-humor that was irrepressible. His very jokes +made his sensitive daughters shudder; and he persisted in wearing his +blue cotton coat of a morning, dining at two o’clock, and having a “bit +of sausage with his tea.” + +He was doomed, however, to share the unpopularity of his family. He +found his old comrades gradually growing cold and civil to him; no +longer laughing at his jokes; and now and then throwing out a fling at +“some people,” and a hint about “quality binding.” This both nettled +and perplexed the honest butcher; and his wife and daughters, with +the consummate policy of the shrewder sex, taking advantage of the +circumstance, at length prevailed upon him to give up his afternoon’s +pipe and tankard at Wagstaff’s; to sit after dinner by himself, and +take his pint of port--a liquor he detested--and to nod in his chair in +solitary and dismal gentility. + +The Miss Lambs might now be seen flaunting along the streets in French +bonnets, with unknown beaux; and talking and laughing so loud that it +distressed the nerves of every good lady within hearing. They even +went so far as to attempt patronage, and actually induced a French +dancing-master to set up in the neighborhood; but the worthy folks of +Little Britain took fire at it, and did so persecute the poor Gaul that +he was fain to pack up fiddle and dancing-pumps, and decamp with such +precipitation that he absolutely forgot to pay for his lodgings. + +I had flattered myself, at first, with the idea that all this fiery +indignation on the part of the community was merely the overflowing of +their zeal for good old English manners, and their horror of innovation; +and I applauded the silent contempt they were so vociferous in +expressing, for upstart pride, French fashions, and the Miss Lambs. But +I grieve to say that I soon perceived the infection had taken hold; +and that my neighbors, after condemning, were beginning to follow their +example. I overheard my landlady importuning her husband to let their +daughters have one quarter at French and music, and that they might take +a few lessons in quadrille. I even saw, in the course of a few Sundays, +no less than five French bonnets, precisely like those of the Miss +Lambs, parading about Little Britain. + +I still had my hopes that all this folly would gradually die away; that +the Lambs might move out of the neighborhood; might die, or might run +away with attorneys’ apprentices; and that quiet and simplicity might be +again restored to the community. But unluckily a rival power arose. An +opulent oilman died, and left a widow with a large jointure and a family +of buxom daughters. The young ladies had long been repining in secret +at the parsimony of a prudent father, which kept down all their elegant +aspirings. Their ambition, being now no longer restrained, broke out +into a blaze, and they openly took the field against the family of the +butcher. It is true that the Lambs, having had the first start, had +naturally an advantage of them in the fashionable career. They could +speak a little bad French, play the piano, dance quadrilles, and had +formed high acquaintances; but the Trotters were not to be distanced. +When the Lambs appeared with two feathers in their hats, the Miss +Trotters mounted four, and of twice as fine colors. If the Lambs gave +a dance, the Trotters were sure not to be behindhand: and though they +might not boast of as good company, yet they had double the number, and +were twice as merry. + +The whole community has at length divided itself into fashionable +factions, under the banners of these two families. The old games of +Pope-Joan and Tom-come-tickle-me are entirely discarded; there is no +such thing as getting up an honest country dance; and on my attempting +to kiss a young lady under the mistletoe last Christmas, I was +indignantly repulsed; the Miss Lambs having pronounced it “shocking +vulgar.” Bitter rivalry has also broken out as to the most fashionable +part of Little Britain; the Lambs standing up for the dignity of +the Cross-Keys Square, and the Trotters for the vicinity of St. +Bartholomew’s. + +Thus is this little territory torn by factions and internal dissensions, +like the great empire who name it bears; and what will be the result +would puzzle the apothecary himself, with all his talent at prognostics, +to determine; though I apprehend that it will terminate in the total +downfall of genuine John Bullism. + +The immediate effects are extremely unpleasant to me. Being a single +man, and, as I observed before, rather an idle good-for-nothing +personage, I have been considered the only gentleman by profession in +the place. I stand therefore in high favor with both parties, and have +to hear all their cabinet councils and mutual backbitings. As I am too +civil not to agree with the ladies on all occasions, I have committed +myself most horribly with both parties, by abusing their opponents. +I might manage to reconcile this to my conscience, which is a truly +accommodating one, but I cannot to my apprehension--if the Lambs and +Trotters ever come to a reconciliation, and compare notes, I am ruined! + +I have determined, therefore, to beat a retreat in time, and am actually +looking out for some other nest in this great city, where old English +manners are still kept up; where French is neither eaten, drunk, danced, +nor spoken; and where there are no fashionable families of retired +tradesmen. This found, I will, like a veteran rat, hasten away before I +have an old house about my ears; bid a long, though a sorrowful, adieu +to my present abode, and leave the rival factions of the Lambs and the +Trotters to divide the distracted empire of LITTLE BRITAIN. + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Little Britain, by Washington Irving + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LITTLE BRITAIN *** + +***** This file should be named 877-0.txt or 877-0.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/8/7/877/ + +Produced by Anthony J. Adam and David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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