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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Learned Women
+
+Author: Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+Posting Date: April 17, 2013 [EBook #8772]
+Release Date: August, 2005
+First Posted: August 12, 2003
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN
+
+(LES FEMMES SAVANTES)
+
+
+BY
+
+MOLIÈRE
+
+
+TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE.
+
+_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_
+
+
+BY
+
+CHARLES HERON WALL
+
+
+
+The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see
+vol. i. p. 153).
+
+Molière acted the part of Chrysale.
+
+
+
+
+PERSONS REPRESENTED
+
+CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_
+
+PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE
+
+ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_
+
+ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE
+
+BÉLISE, _his sister_
+
+CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE
+
+TRISSOTIN, _a wit_
+
+VADIUS, _a learned man_
+
+MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_
+
+LÉPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE
+
+JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS
+
+A NOTARY.
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN.
+
+
+
+
+ACT I.
+
+SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+
+ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of
+maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can
+enter your head!
+
+HEN. Yes, sister.
+
+ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings
+of disgust?
+
+HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to....
+
+ARM. Ah! Fie!
+
+HEN. What?
+
+ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very
+mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a
+repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before
+it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which
+this word implies?
+
+HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I
+only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and
+I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one
+shudder.
+
+ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you?
+
+HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves
+me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the
+delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you
+see no attraction in such a bond?
+
+ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you
+act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think
+of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a
+husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the
+low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour
+to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and
+matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the
+cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is
+everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove
+yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which
+is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous
+pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind.
+Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself,
+sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of
+mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the
+animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level
+of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which
+should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many
+women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities.
+
+HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill
+different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of
+materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar
+to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned
+men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its
+weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with
+the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different
+instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will
+inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will
+taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths,
+we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble
+longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the
+productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more
+material.
+
+ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side
+we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model,
+sister, to cough and spit like her.
+
+HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our
+mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that
+her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray,
+leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by
+wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the
+world.
+
+ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of
+taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend
+to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre?
+
+HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I
+have made?
+
+ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the
+conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that
+Clitandre has publicly sighed for me.
+
+HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not
+share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony,
+and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no
+pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has
+such pretensions?
+
+ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon
+us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a
+husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of
+our admirers.
+
+HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have
+only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it.
+
+ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected
+lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me
+can be dead in his heart?
+
+HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him.
+
+ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when
+he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but
+deceives himself.
+
+HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to
+discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point
+he will be sure to give us full information.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me.
+Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which
+of us has a claim upon your love.
+
+ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an
+explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how
+perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses.
+
+CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to
+speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge
+before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me
+(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this
+side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished
+things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender
+sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an
+immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had
+made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over
+my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked
+elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel.
+(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds
+will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with
+compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you
+had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing
+which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never
+to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this
+gentle bondage.
+
+ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in
+short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous
+that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to
+declare it to me.
+
+HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so
+much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can
+restrain the madness of anger?
+
+ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you
+respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received
+leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you
+to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their
+choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is
+criminal in you to dispose of it yourself.
+
+HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my
+duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced;
+and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see
+that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I
+have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me
+the power of loving you without a crime.
+
+CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind
+permission from you.
+
+ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me
+pain.
+
+HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will
+always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons
+you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far
+from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use
+your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will
+by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech
+you to do so; and in order to secure this end....
+
+ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you
+seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you.
+
+HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked
+by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even
+condescend to do so.
+
+ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating.
+
+HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback.
+
+CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of
+her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave,
+I will go to your father, to....
+
+HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father
+easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he
+himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness
+which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who
+governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she
+has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more
+pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall
+in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem.
+
+CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in
+your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female
+doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of
+everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of
+wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that
+she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In
+short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without
+publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of
+pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly
+respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make
+myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she
+bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and
+wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such
+a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings
+are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the
+markets with wastepaper.
+
+HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is
+unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he
+possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to
+yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is
+engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have
+nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house.
+
+CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot
+consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising
+his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice,
+and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he
+writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the
+persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good
+opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at
+all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings
+of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all
+the honours of the greatest general.
+
+HEN. You have good eyes to see all that.
+
+CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with
+which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I
+pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a
+man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of
+the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be
+Trissotin--and I won my wager.
+
+HEN. What a tale!
+
+CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your
+aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my
+heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--BÉLISE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to
+reveal to you his sincere devotion....
+
+BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me;
+although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no
+interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language
+desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my
+charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your
+secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but
+if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my
+sight.
+
+CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is,
+Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to
+favour the love I have for her.
+
+BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle
+evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over,
+I have never met with anything more ingenious.
+
+CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my
+heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the
+ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains;
+and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much
+towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will
+condescend to second my addresses.
+
+BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I
+understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and
+not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against
+matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your
+love returned.
+
+CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will
+you persist in believing what is not?
+
+BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what
+your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am
+content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and
+that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to
+suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by
+honour, offer only pure vows on my altars.
+
+CLI. But....
+
+BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more
+than I wished to say.
+
+CLI. But your error....
+
+BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear.
+
+CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Molière ends
+this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to
+find a rhyme to _davantage._]
+
+BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_)
+
+Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so
+preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of
+more sense.
+
+
+
+ACT II.
+
+SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to
+him_).
+
+
+Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press,
+insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say
+when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he
+desires! Never....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Good day to you, brother.
+
+CHRY. And to you also, brother.
+
+ARI. Do you know what brings me here?
+
+CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to
+tell me.
+
+ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now?
+
+CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house.
+
+ARI. And what do you think of him?
+
+CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and
+uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit.
+
+ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see
+the esteem you have for him.
+
+CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome.
+
+ARI. Ah!
+
+CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman.
+
+ARI. So it is said.
+
+CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word,
+we were, both of us, very gay young fellows.
+
+ARI. I believe it.
+
+CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke
+of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you.
+
+ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--BÉLISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE,
+ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has
+fallen in love with Henriette.
+
+CHRY. What! with my daughter?
+
+ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover
+so smitten!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the
+story, and the thing is not as you imagine.
+
+ARI. How so, sister?
+
+BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love.
+
+ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking.
+
+BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth.
+
+ARI. He told me so himself.
+
+BEL. Doubtless.
+
+ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her
+father.
+
+BEL. Yes, I know.
+
+ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time
+of an alliance so desired by him.
+
+BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been
+employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an
+ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the
+mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both.
+
+ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves.
+
+BEL. You wish to know?
+
+ARI. Yes; who is it?  BEL. Me!
+
+ARI. You!
+
+BEL. Myself.
+
+ARI. Come, I say! sister!
+
+BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so
+wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to
+have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante,
+Damis, Cléonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms.
+
+ARI. Do those men love you?
+
+BEL. Yes; with all their might.
+
+ARI. They have told you so?
+
+BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present
+time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their
+love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering
+their hearts and lives to me.
+
+ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here.
+
+BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission.
+
+ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere.
+
+BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion.
+
+ARI. Cléonte and Lycidas are both married.
+
+BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love.
+
+ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions.
+
+CHRY. (to BÉLISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies.
+
+BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle
+fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at
+those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted
+to idle fancies.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy.
+
+ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that
+brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage.
+Tell me what answer we can make to his love.
+
+CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider
+his alliance a great honour.
+
+ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that....
+
+CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and
+that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one
+mind in two bodies.
+
+ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable
+to....
+
+CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have
+her agree to it also. Let us go....
+
+CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife,
+and take the business upon myself.
+
+ARI. But....
+
+CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare
+her this moment.
+
+ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and
+will return to know....
+
+CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to
+my wife about it.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a
+dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other
+folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no
+inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.]
+
+CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine?
+
+MAR. What is the matter?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir.
+
+CHRY. Sent away?
+
+MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out.
+
+CHRY. I don't understand; why has she?
+
+MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go.
+
+CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife
+is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick,
+leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again.
+
+CHRY. Gently.
+
+PHI. No; I will have it so.
+
+CHRY. What?
+
+PHI. I insist upon her going.
+
+CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way
+to...?
+
+PHI. What! you take her part?
+
+CHRY. Certainly not.
+
+PHI. You side with her against me?
+
+CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of.
+
+PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause?
+
+CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with  servants....
+
+PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you.
+
+CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary?
+
+PHI. I will have no opposition to my will.
+
+CHRY. Agreed.
+
+PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against
+her, and share my anger.
+
+CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right
+in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be
+forgiven.
+
+MAR. What is it I have done, then?
+
+CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know.
+
+PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing.
+
+CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some
+china?
+
+PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you
+fancy that I should get angry for so little?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then?
+
+PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable?
+
+CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish
+to be stolen from us?
+
+PHI. That would be of little moment.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE)
+What! has she shown herself dishonest?
+
+PHI. It is worse than that.
+
+CHRY. Worse than that?
+
+PHI. Worse.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) What! has she...?
+
+PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons,
+insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned
+in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born
+about 1585; died 1650.]
+
+CHRY. Is that...?
+
+PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the
+foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and
+makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws.
+
+CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime.
+
+PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable?
+
+CHRY. Yes, yes.
+
+PHI. I should like to see you excuse her.
+
+CHRY. Heaven forbid!
+
+BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet
+she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language.
+
+MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't
+understand your jargon, not I.
+
+PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on
+reason and polite custom a jargon!
+
+MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your
+fine speeches don't do me no good.
+
+PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no
+good!_
+
+BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we
+daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting
+_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as
+you have been told, a negative too many.
+
+MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as
+they speaks in our place.
+
+PHI. Ah! who can bear it?
+
+BEL. What a horrible solecism!
+
+PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear.
+
+BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding;
+_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular.
+Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in
+Molière's time was pronounced as _grand'mère_ is now. _Gammer_
+seems the nearest approach to this in English.]
+
+MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer?
+
+PHI. O heavens!
+
+BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told
+you a hundred times where the word comes from.
+
+MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise,
+[Footnote: In Molière's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious
+little.
+
+BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the
+verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive.
+
+MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people.
+
+PHI. What martyrdom!
+
+BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree
+with each other.
+
+MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out?
+
+PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a
+discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away?
+
+CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go,
+don't provoke her, Martine.
+
+PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in
+quite an obliging tone.
+
+CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place.
+(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BÉLISE.
+
+CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of
+sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she
+has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle.
+
+PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to
+torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and
+reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of
+garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the
+gutters of all the market-places?
+
+BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls
+Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are
+either pleonasm or cacophony.
+
+CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of
+Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather
+that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the
+verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that
+she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on
+good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to
+make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words,
+might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote:
+Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.]
+
+PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one
+who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead
+of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the
+body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and
+ought we not to leave it far behind?
+
+CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it;
+_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me.
+
+BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you
+believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over
+the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to
+feed it with the juices of science.
+
+CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of
+but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude
+for....
+
+PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays
+strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the
+purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.]
+
+BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion.
+
+CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I
+will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad,
+and I am greatly troubled at....
+
+PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ BÉLISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least
+solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange
+ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except
+a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you
+should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors
+of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is
+enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are
+offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the
+moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we
+see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for
+many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the
+minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well,
+to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy,
+ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers
+were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew
+enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a
+doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived
+honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation,
+and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she
+worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from
+behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too
+deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest
+secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be
+known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus,
+Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain
+knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the
+soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in
+order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but
+the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole
+house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while
+reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In
+short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I
+am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this
+villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge
+clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all
+this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am
+speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and
+particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with
+his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying
+to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I
+believe that he is rather cracked.
+
+PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language.
+
+BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A
+reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more
+vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I
+hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon
+the spot.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+PHI. Have you any other shaft ready?
+
+CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak
+of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage;
+in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under
+good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of
+a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give
+Henriette a proper husband, who....
+
+PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you
+of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are
+blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the
+man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit
+better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have
+duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a
+word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the
+subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you
+have spoken to her.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a
+talk together.
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given
+her consent? Is the affair settled?
+
+CHRY. Not quite as yet.
+
+ARI. Does she refuse?
+
+CHRY. No.
+
+ARI. Then she hesitates?
+
+CHRY. Not in the least.
+
+ARI. What then?
+
+CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Another man for a son-in-law?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. What is his name?
+
+CHRY. Mr. Trissotin.
+
+ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin....
+
+CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin.
+
+ARI. And you have accepted him?
+
+CHRY. I? Heaven forbid!
+
+ARI. What did you say to it?
+
+CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself.
+
+ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end
+we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her?
+
+CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was
+better for me to say nothing.
+
+ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not
+ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let
+his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose
+anything she has resolved upon?
+
+CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a
+dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a
+terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of
+philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and
+her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over
+the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has
+taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a
+week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know
+where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of
+her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love.
+
+ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has
+absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her
+authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes
+the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer
+yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a
+man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage
+enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your
+daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is
+possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen
+Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom
+your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great
+philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody
+knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a
+shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice.
+
+CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a
+little more courage, brother.
+
+ARI. That's right.
+
+CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman.
+
+ARI. Good.
+
+CHRY. She has abused my gentleness.
+
+ARI. It is true.
+
+CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long.
+
+ARI. Certainly.
+
+CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter,
+and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my
+mind.
+
+ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be.
+
+CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to
+me directly, brother.
+
+ARI. I will go at once.
+
+CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at
+defiance.
+
+
+
+
+ACT III.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE.
+
+
+PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses;
+they should be weighed word by word.
+
+ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them.
+
+BEL. And I am dying for them.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to
+me.
+
+ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure.
+
+BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears.
+
+PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires.
+
+ARM. Lose no time.
+
+BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure.
+
+PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam,
+but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your
+court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since.
+
+PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its
+father.
+
+TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother.
+
+BEL. What wit he has!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you
+run away?
+
+HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse.
+
+PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing
+wonders.
+
+HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and
+witty things are not in my line.
+
+PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret
+which you must learn.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you,
+and your only care is to charm everybody.
+
+HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish....
+
+BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to
+sit down. (LÉPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you
+fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium?
+
+BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall,
+and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point
+which we call the centre of gravity?
+
+LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown!
+
+TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass.
+
+ARM. Ah! wit is everything!
+
+BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._)
+
+PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast.
+
+TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of
+eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to
+join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet
+which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain
+delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think
+you will find the taste of it tolerably good.
+
+ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it.
+
+PHI. Let us quickly give audience.
+
+BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to
+read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry
+to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned.
+
+PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read.
+
+TRI. SONN....
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece.
+
+ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg.
+
+TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1]
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes--_
+
+[1]
+[The sonnet is not of Molière's invention, but is to be found in
+_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris,
+1663. It is called, _Sonnet à Mademoiselle de Longueville, à présent
+Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fièvre quarte_. As, of necessity, the
+translation given above is not very literal, I append the original.
+
+  "Votre prudence est endormie,
+     De traiter magnifiquement,
+     Et de loger superbement,
+   Votre plus cruelle ennemie;
+
+   Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die,
+     De votre riche appartement,
+     Où cette ingrate insolemment
+   Attaque votre belle vie!
+
+   Quoi! sans respecter votre rang,
+   Elle se prend à votre sang,
+     Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage!
+
+   Si vous la conduisez aux bains,
+     Sans la marchander davantage,
+   Noyez-la de vos propres mains."
+
+The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in
+Molière's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently
+true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you,
+nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.]
+
+BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning!
+
+ARM. What a charming turn it has!
+
+PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses.
+
+ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is
+plunged_.
+
+BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of
+charms for me.
+
+PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs
+joined together sound admirably.
+
+BEL. Let us hear the rest.
+
+TRI.
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes_
+
+ARM. _Prudence asleep_!
+
+BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_!
+
+PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_!
+
+TRI.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!
+    From your apartment richly lined,
+  Where that ingrate's outrageous mind
+    At your fair life her javelin throws_.
+
+BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you.
+
+ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg.
+
+PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something
+which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint.
+
+ARM.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes
+    From your apartment richly lined_.
+How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the
+metaphor is introduced!
+
+PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what
+admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the
+passage is invaluable.
+
+ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_.
+
+BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy
+expression.
+
+ARM. I wish I had written it.
+
+BEL. It is worth a whole poem!
+
+PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it?
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh
+
+PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another
+should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips;
+_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will
+she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal
+more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I
+discover in it a hundred meanings.
+
+BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will
+she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you
+realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were
+writing something so witty?
+
+TRI. Ah! ah!
+
+ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful,
+unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her.
+
+PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to
+the triplets, I pray.
+
+ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg.
+
+TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_
+
+TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_
+
+TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever!
+
+TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._
+
+PHI. _Fair life!_
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _What! without heed for your high line,
+  She saps your blood with care malign..._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _Redoubling outrage night and day!
+     If to the bath you take her down,
+  Without a moment's haggling, pray,
+     With your own hands the miscreant drown._
+
+PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering.
+
+BEL. I faint.
+
+ARM. I die from pleasure.
+
+PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one.
+
+ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_
+
+BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_
+
+PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own
+hands, there, drown her there in the bath.
+
+ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty.
+
+BEL. One promenades through them with rapture.
+
+PHI. One treads on fine things only.
+
+ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses.
+
+TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you....
+
+PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more
+beautiful.
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has
+been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part!
+
+HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit
+does not depend on our will.
+
+TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you.
+
+HEN. No. I do not listen.
+
+PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram.
+
+TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY
+FRIENDS. [2]
+
+PHI. His titles have always something rare in them.
+
+ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit.
+
+TRI.
+  _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands,
+  E'en now it costs me more than half my lands,
+  And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Laïs rides in triumph through the land..._
+
+[2]
+[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un
+carosse de couleur amarante, acheté pour une dame.'_
+
+"L'amour si chèrement m'a vendu son lien
+Qu'il me coûte déjà la moitié de mon bien,
+Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse,
+Où tant d'or se relève en bosse,
+Qu'il étonne tout le pays,
+Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Laïs,
+Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante,
+Dis plutôt qu'il est de ma rente."]
+
+PHI. Ah! Laïs! what erudition!
+
+BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million.
+
+TRI.
+  _And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Laïs rides in triumph through the land,
+  Say no more it is amaranth,
+  Say rather it is o' my rent._
+
+ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected
+that?
+
+PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste.
+
+BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_!
+It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my
+rent_.
+
+PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I
+saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of
+your composition, we could admire in our turn.
+
+PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I
+shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of
+the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he
+wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I
+have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at
+the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will
+avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by
+confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime
+knowledge against us.
+
+ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to
+the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the
+beauties of lace, or of a new brocade.
+
+BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim
+our emancipation.
+
+TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I
+render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the
+splendour of their intellect.  PHI. And our sex does you justice in
+this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with
+proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they
+can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they
+wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to
+deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on
+all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to
+none.
+
+TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism.
+
+PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism.
+
+ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid.
+
+BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to
+understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter.
+
+TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism.
+
+ARM. I like his vortices.
+
+PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary
+here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than
+could be given except by very long notes.]
+
+ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves
+by some great discovery.
+
+TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has
+hidden few things from you.
+
+PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one
+discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon.
+
+BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have
+seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the
+day had boasted of having done this.]
+
+ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar,
+history, verse, ethics, and politics.
+
+PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly
+the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the
+Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder.
+
+ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and
+we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy,
+we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs
+and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are
+preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned
+meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to
+purge both prose and verse.
+
+PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise
+which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved
+by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all
+those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of
+scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous
+commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous
+ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted.
+
+TRI. These are indeed admirable projects.
+
+BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready.
+
+TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful.
+
+ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws,
+prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have
+wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with
+everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE.
+
+LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to
+speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone.
+(_They all rise._)
+
+TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him
+the honour of your acquaintance.
+
+PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us.   (TRISSOTIN
+_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BÉLISE). At least, let us do him
+all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is
+going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to
+you.
+
+HEN. But what about?
+
+PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Ménage who
+is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In
+presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing
+a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits.
+
+PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value.
+
+TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows
+Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France.
+
+PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek,
+sister!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek!
+
+ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful!
+
+PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of
+Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BÉLISE _and_
+ARMANDE.)
+
+HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_)
+Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.)
+
+PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books.
+
+VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you
+to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some
+learned discourse.
+
+PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing.
+
+TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he
+could, if he chose, show you something.
+
+VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their
+productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms,
+or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for
+me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about
+begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers,
+often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been
+guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the
+opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any
+unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses
+for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion.
+
+TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others.
+
+VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours.
+
+TRI. You have an easy style, and a fine choice of words.
+
+VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_.
+
+TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in
+sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil.
+
+VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves
+Horace far behind.
+
+TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets?
+
+VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write?
+
+TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus?
+
+VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals?
+
+TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad.
+
+VAD. And in _bouts-rimés_ I think you adorable.
+
+TRI. If France could appreciate your value--
+
+VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius--
+
+TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach.
+
+VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_
+TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to....
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon
+the Princess Urania's fever?
+
+VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday.
+
+TRI. Do you know the author of it?
+
+VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth,
+his sonnet is good for nothing.
+
+TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable.
+
+VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read
+it, you would think like me.
+
+TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few
+people are able to write such a sonnet.
+
+VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad!
+
+TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is
+that I am the author of it.
+
+VAD. You?
+
+TRI. Myself.
+
+VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened.
+
+TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you.
+
+VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader
+spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my
+ballad.
+
+TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer
+the fashion, and savours of ancient times.
+
+VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people.
+
+TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant.
+
+VAD. That does not make it worse.
+
+TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants.
+
+VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you.
+
+TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others.
+
+(_They all rise._)
+
+VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me.
+
+TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver!
+
+VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession!
+
+TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist!
+
+VAD. Go, you pedantic snob!
+
+PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about?
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks
+and Romans for all your shameful thefts.
+
+VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your
+verses.
+
+TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made.
+
+VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse.
+
+TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it.
+
+VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote:
+Boileau.]
+
+TRI. I, too, send you to him.
+
+VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him;
+he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors
+well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all
+his verses you are exposed to his attacks.
+
+TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the
+crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you
+the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately,
+as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and
+his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never
+thinks himself victorious.
+
+VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am.
+
+TRI. And mine will make you know your master.
+
+VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin.
+
+TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote:
+Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no
+doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.]
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in
+the sonnet he dares to attack.
+
+PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of
+something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been
+tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have
+thought of a means of remedying this defect.
+
+HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for
+learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much
+trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head,
+and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to
+have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to
+produce fine words.
+
+PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my
+intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face
+is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which
+only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and
+solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you
+the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of
+knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have
+at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius;
+(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I
+intend you to marry.
+
+HEN. Me, mother!
+
+PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little.
+
+BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for
+leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I
+yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you
+in society.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell
+you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me....
+
+HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry.
+
+PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You
+understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her
+alone for the present.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth;
+she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband....
+
+HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself?
+
+ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed.
+
+HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister.
+
+ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I
+would accept your offer with delight.
+
+HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an
+excellent one.
+
+ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have
+to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in
+vain do you think by resistance to....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my
+daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your
+glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your
+heart consider him as the man I want you to marry.
+
+ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister.
+
+HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over
+us.
+
+ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience.
+
+CHRY. What is the meaning of this?
+
+ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to
+agree on this point, and this other husband....
+
+CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please
+with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done,
+and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders!
+
+CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me!
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us;
+take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How
+moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age,
+and I can still remember my youthful loving days.
+
+
+
+
+ACT IV.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE.
+
+
+ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her
+obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She
+seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at
+defiance the will of her mother.
+
+PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason
+subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or
+body, form or matter.
+
+ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and
+that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite
+of yourself, behaves himself strangely.
+
+PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him
+well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always
+unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and
+yet he has never desired me to read anything to him.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and
+listening unseen_).
+
+ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's
+husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of
+speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think
+that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of
+philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can
+rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond
+all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not
+a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never
+could see that he had in his heart any respect for you.
+
+PHI. Poor idiot!
+
+ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in
+praising you.
+
+PHI. The churl!
+
+ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions,
+without his ever thinking them fine.
+
+PHI. The impertinent fellow!
+
+ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe
+what foolish things....
+
+CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at
+least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what
+am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to
+destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me
+odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great
+indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam,
+an impartial judge between us.
+
+ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find
+enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has
+such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose
+fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be
+compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless
+heart is a monster of immorality.
+
+CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your
+mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it
+imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the
+offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For
+two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care,
+duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my
+attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed
+to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another.
+Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after
+change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather
+turn me away?
+
+ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it
+of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the
+purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me
+keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense;
+and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in
+which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material
+passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you
+must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How
+far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The
+senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites
+the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame
+pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only
+sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is
+mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of
+loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their
+transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget.
+
+CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so,
+that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached
+to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this
+separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul
+go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that
+purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the
+soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But
+such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross
+and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given
+to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for
+lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble
+sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue;
+that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable
+and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without
+giving you cause to be offended at such a thought.
+
+ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say,
+your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a
+faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will,
+if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you
+wish.
+
+CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to
+return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I
+sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled
+when you disdained me.
+
+PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my
+consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it
+enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not
+expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny
+of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux
+esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to
+translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself
+beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed
+to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of
+the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives
+nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us.
+Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has
+made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid
+verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them.
+
+PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him
+with other eyes than you do.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We
+have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us,
+and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_.
+Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way
+it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so
+much glass.
+
+PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman
+would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and
+above all to hate intellect and knowledge.
+
+CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain
+myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils
+people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather
+be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain
+people.
+
+TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the
+contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything.
+
+CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and
+in deeds.
+
+TRI. The paradox is rather strong.
+
+CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very
+clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be
+wanting.
+
+TRI. You might cite some without proving your point.
+
+CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want.
+
+TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples.
+
+CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me.
+
+TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and
+not knowledge.
+
+CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is
+more of a fool than an ignorant one.
+
+TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a
+fool are synonymous.
+
+CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater
+connection between pedant and fool.
+
+TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly.
+
+CLI. And study adds to nature in the other.
+
+TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value.
+
+CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence.
+
+TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly
+take up arms in its defence.
+
+CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with
+learned people of a certain kind.
+
+TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them
+well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind.
+
+CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a
+question with certain people.
+
+PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir....
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough
+without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an
+adversary, and as I fight I retreat.
+
+ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers....
+
+CLI. Another ally! I quit the field.
+
+PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no
+one in particular.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can
+bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many
+other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it.
+
+TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this
+contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The
+court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a
+certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he
+takes up its defence.
+
+CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great
+indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it;
+making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for
+its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success.
+Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which
+your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you,
+to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is
+not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has
+good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can
+be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without
+flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry.
+
+TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir.
+
+CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad?
+
+TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour
+to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no
+notice from the court.
+
+CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you
+forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me
+what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their
+writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible
+injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours
+on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France!
+and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These
+wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed
+and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the
+state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that
+at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured
+down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon
+them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think
+themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have
+said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and
+ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming
+themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the
+indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in
+books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for
+all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything,
+void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they
+decry everywhere true learning and knowledge.
+
+PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows
+the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which
+excites in your breast....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN.
+
+JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and
+whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this
+letter.
+
+PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a
+piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a
+servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the
+household to be introduced.
+
+JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book.
+
+PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry
+your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your
+wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage
+before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While
+you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in
+all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus,
+where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has
+pilfered._"
+
+We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I
+have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an
+action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it
+does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your
+master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I
+set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I
+esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this
+gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN).
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may
+assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you
+to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister
+of my decision.
+
+ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman
+will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her
+heart to rebellion.
+
+PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring
+her to a sense of her duty.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite
+according to your views.
+
+CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety
+upon your mind.
+
+ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful.
+
+CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation.
+
+ARM. I hope it may be so.
+
+CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help.
+
+ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power.
+
+CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for
+your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in
+favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in
+the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin?
+
+ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is
+carrying it off over the head of his rival.
+
+CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night.
+
+CHRY. To-night?
+
+CLI. Yes, to-night.
+
+CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have
+you both married.
+
+CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract.
+
+CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up.
+
+CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to
+which she must look forward.
+
+CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for
+this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master
+but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will
+return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my
+son-in-law.
+
+HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition.
+
+ARI. I will do everything to serve your love.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my
+greatest hope is in your constancy.
+
+HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love.
+
+CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that.
+
+HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me.
+
+CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to
+fear.
+
+HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes,
+and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have
+resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else.
+
+CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of
+your love.
+
+
+
+
+ACT V.
+
+SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN.
+
+
+HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon
+that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that,
+seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you
+listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a
+considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has
+no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly
+grandeur should not show itself in your words only.
+
+TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your
+dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble
+air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows
+and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured.
+
+HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and
+to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one
+can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You
+know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that
+Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much
+less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice
+of a husband, and that with your many talents you ought to please me.
+I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that
+reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness.
+
+TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give
+me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I
+have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved.
+
+HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by
+your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my
+confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which
+springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but
+is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases
+us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love,
+all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus
+guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the
+violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of
+honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he
+feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and
+will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to
+exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up
+your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so
+precious as yours.
+
+TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it
+can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be
+loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms....
+
+HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so
+many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses
+you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that....
+
+TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is
+only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the
+adorable Henriette.
+
+HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you....
+
+TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love,
+ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can
+put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty
+condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who
+wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining
+such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little
+to me how it comes to pass.
+
+HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by
+using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry
+a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain
+revenge that a husband should fear.
+
+TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A
+philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all
+vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from
+minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for
+Wives,' act iv. scene vi.]
+
+HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that
+philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with
+constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit
+subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in
+giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the
+truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another;
+and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the
+happiness of seeing you my husband.
+
+TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end.
+In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your
+duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach
+your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is
+Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house
+again.
+
+HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to
+change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved,
+and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do
+not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having
+her own way.
+
+CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby?
+
+HEN. Heaven forbid!
+
+CHRY. Am I a fool, pray?
+
+HEN. I do not say that.
+
+CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense?
+
+HEN. No, father.
+
+CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home?
+
+HEN. Of course.
+
+CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the
+nose?
+
+HEN. Oh dear, no, father.
+
+CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me
+as you do!
+
+HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally.
+
+CHRY. My will is law in this place.
+
+HEN. Certainly, father.
+
+CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command.
+
+HEN. Yes, you are right, father.
+
+CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family.
+
+HEN. Agreed.
+
+CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand.
+
+HEN. Yes, indeed, father.
+
+CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you.
+
+HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary.
+
+CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your
+father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey.
+
+HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to
+you is my earnest wish.
+
+CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will.
+
+CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her.
+
+CHRY. Back me up, all of you.
+
+MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY,
+CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style,
+and give us a contract couched in noble language?
+
+NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to
+try and change a single word.
+
+BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for
+learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to
+have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date
+in Ides and Kalends.
+
+NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would
+hiss me.
+
+PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit
+down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares
+to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to
+know?
+
+CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do.
+
+NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride?
+
+PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage.
+
+NOT. Good.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is
+Henriette.
+
+NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom?
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give
+her.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry
+is this gentleman.
+
+NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down
+Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre.
+
+NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is
+to be the future husband.
+
+PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice.
+
+CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will.
+
+NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes.
+
+CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of
+the wealth which is in my family.
+
+PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it
+were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man.
+
+CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre.
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband
+she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing
+is settled.
+
+CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone.
+
+MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up
+the lead to the men in everything.
+
+CHRY. That is well said.
+
+MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the
+hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there.
+
+CHRY. Just so.
+
+MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his
+wife wears the breeches.
+
+CHRY. It is perfectly true.
+
+MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master
+of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the
+henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke
+too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on
+the ear, he made me pitch it lower.
+
+CHRY. You speak as you ought.
+
+MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter.
+
+CHRY. Certainly.
+
+MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in
+order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about
+something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares
+neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin.
+
+CHRY. Excellent.
+
+PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease.
+
+MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have
+said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my
+husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books
+agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to
+anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who
+doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in
+short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this
+scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly
+at times.]
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened
+patiently enough to your worthy interpreter?
+
+CHRY. She has only said the truth.
+
+PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed.
+(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be
+united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply;
+and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister.
+
+CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE
+and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent?
+
+HEN. How! father...!
+
+CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...!
+
+BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are
+establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star;
+the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE,
+TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE.
+
+ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad
+tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me
+bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney.
+(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons.
+
+PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us?
+
+ARI. You can read it in this letter.
+
+PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it
+will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself.
+The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause
+that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have
+altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_
+
+CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost!
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no
+way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind
+wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost
+you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with
+all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for
+criminals.
+
+ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest
+against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the
+court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs."
+
+PHI. Let us see the other.
+
+CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts
+me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you
+had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon,
+and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O
+Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment!
+
+PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the
+truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he
+still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and
+please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth
+will be sufficient for us and for him.
+
+TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further.
+I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no
+intention of forcing the wills of others.
+
+PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of
+fortune.
+
+TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to
+relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for
+a heart that will not surrender itself.
+
+PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto
+refused to believe.
+
+TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how
+you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of
+the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of
+more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble
+servant. (_Exit_.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE,
+CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little
+like a philosopher he has acted.
+
+CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my
+destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess.
+
+PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward
+your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection....
+
+HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist
+your will.
+
+CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody
+for me....
+
+HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired
+you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw
+that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such
+reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity.
+
+CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery.
+
+HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the
+torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more
+than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of
+all the sorrows that follow such an engagement.
+
+ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason
+which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre?
+
+HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with
+all my heart.
+
+ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news
+I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to
+serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her
+philosopher would prove when put to the test.
+
+CHRY. Heaven be praised!
+
+PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly
+deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to
+see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her.
+
+ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love?
+
+PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your
+philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned.
+
+BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart.
+Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they
+repent ever after.
+
+CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up
+the contract in accordance with what I said.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
+
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: The Learned Women
+
+Author: Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+Posting Date: April 17, 2013 [EBook #8772]
+Release Date: August, 2005
+First Posted: August 12, 2003
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN
+
+(LES FEMMES SAVANTES)
+
+
+BY
+
+MOLIERE
+
+
+TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE.
+
+_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_
+
+
+BY
+
+CHARLES HERON WALL
+
+
+
+The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see
+vol. i. p. 153).
+
+Moliere acted the part of Chrysale.
+
+
+
+
+PERSONS REPRESENTED
+
+CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_
+
+PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE
+
+ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_
+
+ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE
+
+BELISE, _his sister_
+
+CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE
+
+TRISSOTIN, _a wit_
+
+VADIUS, _a learned man_
+
+MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_
+
+LEPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE
+
+JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS
+
+A NOTARY.
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN.
+
+
+
+
+ACT I.
+
+SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+
+ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of
+maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can
+enter your head!
+
+HEN. Yes, sister.
+
+ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings
+of disgust?
+
+HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to....
+
+ARM. Ah! Fie!
+
+HEN. What?
+
+ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very
+mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a
+repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before
+it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which
+this word implies?
+
+HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I
+only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and
+I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one
+shudder.
+
+ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you?
+
+HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves
+me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the
+delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you
+see no attraction in such a bond?
+
+ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you
+act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think
+of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a
+husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the
+low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour
+to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and
+matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the
+cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is
+everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove
+yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which
+is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous
+pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind.
+Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself,
+sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of
+mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the
+animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level
+of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which
+should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many
+women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities.
+
+HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill
+different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of
+materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar
+to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned
+men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its
+weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with
+the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different
+instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will
+inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will
+taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths,
+we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble
+longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the
+productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more
+material.
+
+ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side
+we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model,
+sister, to cough and spit like her.
+
+HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our
+mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that
+her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray,
+leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by
+wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the
+world.
+
+ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of
+taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend
+to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre?
+
+HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I
+have made?
+
+ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the
+conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that
+Clitandre has publicly sighed for me.
+
+HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not
+share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony,
+and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no
+pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has
+such pretensions?
+
+ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon
+us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a
+husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of
+our admirers.
+
+HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have
+only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it.
+
+ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected
+lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me
+can be dead in his heart?
+
+HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him.
+
+ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when
+he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but
+deceives himself.
+
+HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to
+discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point
+he will be sure to give us full information.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me.
+Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which
+of us has a claim upon your love.
+
+ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an
+explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how
+perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses.
+
+CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to
+speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge
+before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me
+(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this
+side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished
+things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender
+sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an
+immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had
+made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over
+my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked
+elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel.
+(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds
+will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with
+compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you
+had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing
+which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never
+to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this
+gentle bondage.
+
+ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in
+short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous
+that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to
+declare it to me.
+
+HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so
+much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can
+restrain the madness of anger?
+
+ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you
+respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received
+leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you
+to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their
+choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is
+criminal in you to dispose of it yourself.
+
+HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my
+duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced;
+and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see
+that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I
+have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me
+the power of loving you without a crime.
+
+CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind
+permission from you.
+
+ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me
+pain.
+
+HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will
+always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons
+you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far
+from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use
+your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will
+by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech
+you to do so; and in order to secure this end....
+
+ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you
+seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you.
+
+HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked
+by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even
+condescend to do so.
+
+ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating.
+
+HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback.
+
+CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of
+her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave,
+I will go to your father, to....
+
+HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father
+easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he
+himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness
+which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who
+governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she
+has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more
+pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall
+in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem.
+
+CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in
+your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female
+doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of
+everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of
+wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that
+she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In
+short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without
+publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of
+pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly
+respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make
+myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she
+bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and
+wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such
+a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings
+are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the
+markets with wastepaper.
+
+HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is
+unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he
+possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to
+yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is
+engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have
+nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house.
+
+CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot
+consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising
+his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice,
+and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he
+writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the
+persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good
+opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at
+all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings
+of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all
+the honours of the greatest general.
+
+HEN. You have good eyes to see all that.
+
+CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with
+which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I
+pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a
+man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of
+the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be
+Trissotin--and I won my wager.
+
+HEN. What a tale!
+
+CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your
+aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my
+heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--BELISE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to
+reveal to you his sincere devotion....
+
+BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me;
+although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no
+interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language
+desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my
+charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your
+secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but
+if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my
+sight.
+
+CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is,
+Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to
+favour the love I have for her.
+
+BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle
+evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over,
+I have never met with anything more ingenious.
+
+CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my
+heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the
+ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains;
+and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much
+towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will
+condescend to second my addresses.
+
+BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I
+understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and
+not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against
+matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your
+love returned.
+
+CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will
+you persist in believing what is not?
+
+BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what
+your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am
+content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and
+that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to
+suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by
+honour, offer only pure vows on my altars.
+
+CLI. But....
+
+BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more
+than I wished to say.
+
+CLI. But your error....
+
+BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear.
+
+CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Moliere ends
+this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to
+find a rhyme to _davantage._]
+
+BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_)
+
+Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so
+preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of
+more sense.
+
+
+
+ACT II.
+
+SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to
+him_).
+
+
+Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press,
+insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say
+when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he
+desires! Never....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Good day to you, brother.
+
+CHRY. And to you also, brother.
+
+ARI. Do you know what brings me here?
+
+CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to
+tell me.
+
+ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now?
+
+CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house.
+
+ARI. And what do you think of him?
+
+CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and
+uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit.
+
+ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see
+the esteem you have for him.
+
+CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome.
+
+ARI. Ah!
+
+CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman.
+
+ARI. So it is said.
+
+CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word,
+we were, both of us, very gay young fellows.
+
+ARI. I believe it.
+
+CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke
+of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you.
+
+ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--BELISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE,
+ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has
+fallen in love with Henriette.
+
+CHRY. What! with my daughter?
+
+ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover
+so smitten!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the
+story, and the thing is not as you imagine.
+
+ARI. How so, sister?
+
+BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love.
+
+ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking.
+
+BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth.
+
+ARI. He told me so himself.
+
+BEL. Doubtless.
+
+ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her
+father.
+
+BEL. Yes, I know.
+
+ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time
+of an alliance so desired by him.
+
+BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been
+employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an
+ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the
+mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both.
+
+ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves.
+
+BEL. You wish to know?
+
+ARI. Yes; who is it?  BEL. Me!
+
+ARI. You!
+
+BEL. Myself.
+
+ARI. Come, I say! sister!
+
+BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so
+wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to
+have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante,
+Damis, Cleonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms.
+
+ARI. Do those men love you?
+
+BEL. Yes; with all their might.
+
+ARI. They have told you so?
+
+BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present
+time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their
+love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering
+their hearts and lives to me.
+
+ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here.
+
+BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission.
+
+ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere.
+
+BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion.
+
+ARI. Cleonte and Lycidas are both married.
+
+BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love.
+
+ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions.
+
+CHRY. (to BELISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies.
+
+BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle
+fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at
+those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted
+to idle fancies.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy.
+
+ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that
+brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage.
+Tell me what answer we can make to his love.
+
+CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider
+his alliance a great honour.
+
+ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that....
+
+CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and
+that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one
+mind in two bodies.
+
+ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable
+to....
+
+CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have
+her agree to it also. Let us go....
+
+CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife,
+and take the business upon myself.
+
+ARI. But....
+
+CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare
+her this moment.
+
+ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and
+will return to know....
+
+CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to
+my wife about it.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a
+dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other
+folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no
+inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.]
+
+CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine?
+
+MAR. What is the matter?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir.
+
+CHRY. Sent away?
+
+MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out.
+
+CHRY. I don't understand; why has she?
+
+MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go.
+
+CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife
+is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick,
+leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again.
+
+CHRY. Gently.
+
+PHI. No; I will have it so.
+
+CHRY. What?
+
+PHI. I insist upon her going.
+
+CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way
+to...?
+
+PHI. What! you take her part?
+
+CHRY. Certainly not.
+
+PHI. You side with her against me?
+
+CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of.
+
+PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause?
+
+CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with  servants....
+
+PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you.
+
+CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary?
+
+PHI. I will have no opposition to my will.
+
+CHRY. Agreed.
+
+PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against
+her, and share my anger.
+
+CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right
+in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be
+forgiven.
+
+MAR. What is it I have done, then?
+
+CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know.
+
+PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing.
+
+CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some
+china?
+
+PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you
+fancy that I should get angry for so little?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then?
+
+PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable?
+
+CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish
+to be stolen from us?
+
+PHI. That would be of little moment.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE)
+What! has she shown herself dishonest?
+
+PHI. It is worse than that.
+
+CHRY. Worse than that?
+
+PHI. Worse.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) What! has she...?
+
+PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons,
+insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned
+in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born
+about 1585; died 1650.]
+
+CHRY. Is that...?
+
+PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the
+foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and
+makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws.
+
+CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime.
+
+PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable?
+
+CHRY. Yes, yes.
+
+PHI. I should like to see you excuse her.
+
+CHRY. Heaven forbid!
+
+BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet
+she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language.
+
+MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't
+understand your jargon, not I.
+
+PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on
+reason and polite custom a jargon!
+
+MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your
+fine speeches don't do me no good.
+
+PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no
+good!_
+
+BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we
+daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting
+_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as
+you have been told, a negative too many.
+
+MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as
+they speaks in our place.
+
+PHI. Ah! who can bear it?
+
+BEL. What a horrible solecism!
+
+PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear.
+
+BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding;
+_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular.
+Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in
+Moliere's time was pronounced as _grand'mere_ is now. _Gammer_
+seems the nearest approach to this in English.]
+
+MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer?
+
+PHI. O heavens!
+
+BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told
+you a hundred times where the word comes from.
+
+MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise,
+[Footnote: In Moliere's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious
+little.
+
+BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the
+verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive.
+
+MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people.
+
+PHI. What martyrdom!
+
+BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree
+with each other.
+
+MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out?
+
+PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a
+discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away?
+
+CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go,
+don't provoke her, Martine.
+
+PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in
+quite an obliging tone.
+
+CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place.
+(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BELISE.
+
+CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of
+sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she
+has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle.
+
+PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to
+torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and
+reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of
+garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the
+gutters of all the market-places?
+
+BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls
+Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are
+either pleonasm or cacophony.
+
+CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of
+Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather
+that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the
+verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that
+she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on
+good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to
+make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words,
+might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote:
+Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.]
+
+PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one
+who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead
+of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the
+body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and
+ought we not to leave it far behind?
+
+CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it;
+_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me.
+
+BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you
+believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over
+the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to
+feed it with the juices of science.
+
+CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of
+but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude
+for....
+
+PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays
+strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the
+purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.]
+
+BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion.
+
+CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I
+will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad,
+and I am greatly troubled at....
+
+PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ BELISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least
+solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange
+ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except
+a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you
+should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors
+of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is
+enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are
+offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the
+moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we
+see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for
+many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the
+minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well,
+to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy,
+ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers
+were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew
+enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a
+doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived
+honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation,
+and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she
+worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from
+behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too
+deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest
+secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be
+known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus,
+Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain
+knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the
+soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in
+order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but
+the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole
+house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while
+reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In
+short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I
+am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this
+villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge
+clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all
+this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am
+speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and
+particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with
+his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying
+to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I
+believe that he is rather cracked.
+
+PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language.
+
+BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A
+reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more
+vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I
+hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon
+the spot.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+PHI. Have you any other shaft ready?
+
+CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak
+of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage;
+in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under
+good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of
+a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give
+Henriette a proper husband, who....
+
+PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you
+of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are
+blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the
+man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit
+better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have
+duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a
+word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the
+subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you
+have spoken to her.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a
+talk together.
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given
+her consent? Is the affair settled?
+
+CHRY. Not quite as yet.
+
+ARI. Does she refuse?
+
+CHRY. No.
+
+ARI. Then she hesitates?
+
+CHRY. Not in the least.
+
+ARI. What then?
+
+CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Another man for a son-in-law?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. What is his name?
+
+CHRY. Mr. Trissotin.
+
+ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin....
+
+CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin.
+
+ARI. And you have accepted him?
+
+CHRY. I? Heaven forbid!
+
+ARI. What did you say to it?
+
+CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself.
+
+ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end
+we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her?
+
+CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was
+better for me to say nothing.
+
+ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not
+ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let
+his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose
+anything she has resolved upon?
+
+CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a
+dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a
+terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of
+philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and
+her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over
+the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has
+taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a
+week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know
+where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of
+her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love.
+
+ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has
+absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her
+authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes
+the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer
+yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a
+man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage
+enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your
+daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is
+possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen
+Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom
+your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great
+philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody
+knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a
+shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice.
+
+CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a
+little more courage, brother.
+
+ARI. That's right.
+
+CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman.
+
+ARI. Good.
+
+CHRY. She has abused my gentleness.
+
+ARI. It is true.
+
+CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long.
+
+ARI. Certainly.
+
+CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter,
+and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my
+mind.
+
+ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be.
+
+CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to
+me directly, brother.
+
+ARI. I will go at once.
+
+CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at
+defiance.
+
+
+
+
+ACT III.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE.
+
+
+PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses;
+they should be weighed word by word.
+
+ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them.
+
+BEL. And I am dying for them.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to
+me.
+
+ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure.
+
+BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears.
+
+PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires.
+
+ARM. Lose no time.
+
+BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure.
+
+PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam,
+but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your
+court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since.
+
+PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its
+father.
+
+TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother.
+
+BEL. What wit he has!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you
+run away?
+
+HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse.
+
+PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing
+wonders.
+
+HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and
+witty things are not in my line.
+
+PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret
+which you must learn.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you,
+and your only care is to charm everybody.
+
+HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish....
+
+BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LEPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to
+sit down. (LEPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you
+fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium?
+
+BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall,
+and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point
+which we call the centre of gravity?
+
+LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LEPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown!
+
+TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass.
+
+ARM. Ah! wit is everything!
+
+BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._)
+
+PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast.
+
+TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of
+eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to
+join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet
+which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain
+delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think
+you will find the taste of it tolerably good.
+
+ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it.
+
+PHI. Let us quickly give audience.
+
+BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to
+read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry
+to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned.
+
+PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read.
+
+TRI. SONN....
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece.
+
+ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg.
+
+TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1]
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes--_
+
+[1]
+[The sonnet is not of Moliere's invention, but is to be found in
+_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris,
+1663. It is called, _Sonnet a Mademoiselle de Longueville, a present
+Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fievre quarte_. As, of necessity, the
+translation given above is not very literal, I append the original.
+
+  "Votre prudence est endormie,
+     De traiter magnifiquement,
+     Et de loger superbement,
+   Votre plus cruelle ennemie;
+
+   Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die,
+     De votre riche appartement,
+     Ou cette ingrate insolemment
+   Attaque votre belle vie!
+
+   Quoi! sans respecter votre rang,
+   Elle se prend a votre sang,
+     Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage!
+
+   Si vous la conduisez aux bains,
+     Sans la marchander davantage,
+   Noyez-la de vos propres mains."
+
+The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in
+Moliere's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently
+true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you,
+nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.]
+
+BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning!
+
+ARM. What a charming turn it has!
+
+PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses.
+
+ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is
+plunged_.
+
+BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of
+charms for me.
+
+PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs
+joined together sound admirably.
+
+BEL. Let us hear the rest.
+
+TRI.
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes_
+
+ARM. _Prudence asleep_!
+
+BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_!
+
+PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_!
+
+TRI.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!
+    From your apartment richly lined,
+  Where that ingrate's outrageous mind
+    At your fair life her javelin throws_.
+
+BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you.
+
+ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg.
+
+PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something
+which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint.
+
+ARM.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes
+    From your apartment richly lined_.
+How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the
+metaphor is introduced!
+
+PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what
+admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the
+passage is invaluable.
+
+ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_.
+
+BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy
+expression.
+
+ARM. I wish I had written it.
+
+BEL. It is worth a whole poem!
+
+PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it?
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh
+
+PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another
+should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips;
+_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will
+she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal
+more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I
+discover in it a hundred meanings.
+
+BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will
+she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you
+realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were
+writing something so witty?
+
+TRI. Ah! ah!
+
+ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful,
+unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her.
+
+PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to
+the triplets, I pray.
+
+ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg.
+
+TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_
+
+TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_
+
+TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever!
+
+TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._
+
+PHI. _Fair life!_
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _What! without heed for your high line,
+  She saps your blood with care malign..._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _Redoubling outrage night and day!
+     If to the bath you take her down,
+  Without a moment's haggling, pray,
+     With your own hands the miscreant drown._
+
+PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering.
+
+BEL. I faint.
+
+ARM. I die from pleasure.
+
+PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one.
+
+ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_
+
+BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_
+
+PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own
+hands, there, drown her there in the bath.
+
+ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty.
+
+BEL. One promenades through them with rapture.
+
+PHI. One treads on fine things only.
+
+ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses.
+
+TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you....
+
+PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more
+beautiful.
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has
+been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part!
+
+HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit
+does not depend on our will.
+
+TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you.
+
+HEN. No. I do not listen.
+
+PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram.
+
+TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY
+FRIENDS. [2]
+
+PHI. His titles have always something rare in them.
+
+ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit.
+
+TRI.
+  _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands,
+  E'en now it costs me more than half my lands,
+  And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Lais rides in triumph through the land..._
+
+[2]
+[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un
+carosse de couleur amarante, achete pour une dame.'_
+
+"L'amour si cherement m'a vendu son lien
+Qu'il me coute deja la moitie de mon bien,
+Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse,
+Ou tant d'or se releve en bosse,
+Qu'il etonne tout le pays,
+Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Lais,
+Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante,
+Dis plutot qu'il est de ma rente."]
+
+PHI. Ah! Lais! what erudition!
+
+BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million.
+
+TRI.
+  _And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Lais rides in triumph through the land,
+  Say no more it is amaranth,
+  Say rather it is o' my rent._
+
+ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected
+that?
+
+PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste.
+
+BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_!
+It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my
+rent_.
+
+PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I
+saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of
+your composition, we could admire in our turn.
+
+PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I
+shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of
+the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he
+wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I
+have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at
+the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will
+avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by
+confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime
+knowledge against us.
+
+ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to
+the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the
+beauties of lace, or of a new brocade.
+
+BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim
+our emancipation.
+
+TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I
+render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the
+splendour of their intellect.  PHI. And our sex does you justice in
+this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with
+proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they
+can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they
+wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to
+deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on
+all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to
+none.
+
+TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism.
+
+PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism.
+
+ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid.
+
+BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to
+understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter.
+
+TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism.
+
+ARM. I like his vortices.
+
+PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary
+here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than
+could be given except by very long notes.]
+
+ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves
+by some great discovery.
+
+TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has
+hidden few things from you.
+
+PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one
+discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon.
+
+BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have
+seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the
+day had boasted of having done this.]
+
+ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar,
+history, verse, ethics, and politics.
+
+PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly
+the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the
+Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder.
+
+ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and
+we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy,
+we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs
+and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are
+preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned
+meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to
+purge both prose and verse.
+
+PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise
+which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved
+by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all
+those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of
+scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous
+commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous
+ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted.
+
+TRI. These are indeed admirable projects.
+
+BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready.
+
+TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful.
+
+ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws,
+prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have
+wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with
+everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE.
+
+LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to
+speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone.
+(_They all rise._)
+
+TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him
+the honour of your acquaintance.
+
+PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us.   (TRISSOTIN
+_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BELISE). At least, let us do him
+all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is
+going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to
+you.
+
+HEN. But what about?
+
+PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Menage who
+is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In
+presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing
+a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits.
+
+PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value.
+
+TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows
+Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France.
+
+PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek,
+sister!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek!
+
+ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful!
+
+PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of
+Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BELISE _and_
+ARMANDE.)
+
+HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_)
+Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.)
+
+PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books.
+
+VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you
+to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some
+learned discourse.
+
+PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing.
+
+TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he
+could, if he chose, show you something.
+
+VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their
+productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms,
+or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for
+me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about
+begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers,
+often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been
+guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the
+opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any
+unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses
+for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion.
+
+TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others.
+
+VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours.
+
+TRI. You have an easy style, and a fine choice of words.
+
+VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_.
+
+TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in
+sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil.
+
+VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves
+Horace far behind.
+
+TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets?
+
+VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write?
+
+TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus?
+
+VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals?
+
+TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad.
+
+VAD. And in _bouts-rimes_ I think you adorable.
+
+TRI. If France could appreciate your value--
+
+VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius--
+
+TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach.
+
+VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_
+TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to....
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon
+the Princess Urania's fever?
+
+VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday.
+
+TRI. Do you know the author of it?
+
+VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth,
+his sonnet is good for nothing.
+
+TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable.
+
+VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read
+it, you would think like me.
+
+TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few
+people are able to write such a sonnet.
+
+VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad!
+
+TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is
+that I am the author of it.
+
+VAD. You?
+
+TRI. Myself.
+
+VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened.
+
+TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you.
+
+VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader
+spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my
+ballad.
+
+TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer
+the fashion, and savours of ancient times.
+
+VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people.
+
+TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant.
+
+VAD. That does not make it worse.
+
+TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants.
+
+VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you.
+
+TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others.
+
+(_They all rise._)
+
+VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me.
+
+TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver!
+
+VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession!
+
+TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist!
+
+VAD. Go, you pedantic snob!
+
+PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about?
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks
+and Romans for all your shameful thefts.
+
+VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your
+verses.
+
+TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made.
+
+VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse.
+
+TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it.
+
+VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote:
+Boileau.]
+
+TRI. I, too, send you to him.
+
+VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him;
+he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors
+well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all
+his verses you are exposed to his attacks.
+
+TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the
+crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you
+the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately,
+as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and
+his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never
+thinks himself victorious.
+
+VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am.
+
+TRI. And mine will make you know your master.
+
+VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin.
+
+TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote:
+Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no
+doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.]
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in
+the sonnet he dares to attack.
+
+PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of
+something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been
+tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have
+thought of a means of remedying this defect.
+
+HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for
+learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much
+trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head,
+and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to
+have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to
+produce fine words.
+
+PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my
+intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face
+is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which
+only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and
+solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you
+the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of
+knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have
+at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius;
+(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I
+intend you to marry.
+
+HEN. Me, mother!
+
+PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little.
+
+BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for
+leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I
+yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you
+in society.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell
+you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me....
+
+HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry.
+
+PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You
+understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her
+alone for the present.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth;
+she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband....
+
+HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself?
+
+ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed.
+
+HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister.
+
+ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I
+would accept your offer with delight.
+
+HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an
+excellent one.
+
+ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have
+to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in
+vain do you think by resistance to....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my
+daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your
+glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your
+heart consider him as the man I want you to marry.
+
+ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister.
+
+HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over
+us.
+
+ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience.
+
+CHRY. What is the meaning of this?
+
+ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to
+agree on this point, and this other husband....
+
+CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please
+with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done,
+and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders!
+
+CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me!
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us;
+take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How
+moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age,
+and I can still remember my youthful loving days.
+
+
+
+
+ACT IV.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE.
+
+
+ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her
+obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She
+seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at
+defiance the will of her mother.
+
+PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason
+subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or
+body, form or matter.
+
+ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and
+that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite
+of yourself, behaves himself strangely.
+
+PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him
+well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always
+unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and
+yet he has never desired me to read anything to him.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and
+listening unseen_).
+
+ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's
+husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of
+speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think
+that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of
+philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can
+rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond
+all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not
+a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never
+could see that he had in his heart any respect for you.
+
+PHI. Poor idiot!
+
+ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in
+praising you.
+
+PHI. The churl!
+
+ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions,
+without his ever thinking them fine.
+
+PHI. The impertinent fellow!
+
+ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe
+what foolish things....
+
+CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at
+least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what
+am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to
+destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me
+odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great
+indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam,
+an impartial judge between us.
+
+ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find
+enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has
+such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose
+fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be
+compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless
+heart is a monster of immorality.
+
+CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your
+mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it
+imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the
+offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For
+two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care,
+duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my
+attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed
+to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another.
+Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after
+change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather
+turn me away?
+
+ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it
+of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the
+purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me
+keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense;
+and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in
+which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material
+passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you
+must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How
+far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The
+senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites
+the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame
+pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only
+sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is
+mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of
+loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their
+transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget.
+
+CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so,
+that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached
+to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this
+separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul
+go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that
+purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the
+soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But
+such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross
+and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given
+to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for
+lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble
+sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue;
+that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable
+and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without
+giving you cause to be offended at such a thought.
+
+ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say,
+your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a
+faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will,
+if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you
+wish.
+
+CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to
+return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I
+sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled
+when you disdained me.
+
+PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my
+consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it
+enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not
+expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny
+of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux
+esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to
+translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself
+beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed
+to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of
+the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives
+nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us.
+Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has
+made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid
+verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them.
+
+PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him
+with other eyes than you do.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We
+have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us,
+and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_.
+Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way
+it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so
+much glass.
+
+PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman
+would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and
+above all to hate intellect and knowledge.
+
+CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain
+myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils
+people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather
+be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain
+people.
+
+TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the
+contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything.
+
+CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and
+in deeds.
+
+TRI. The paradox is rather strong.
+
+CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very
+clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be
+wanting.
+
+TRI. You might cite some without proving your point.
+
+CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want.
+
+TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples.
+
+CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me.
+
+TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and
+not knowledge.
+
+CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is
+more of a fool than an ignorant one.
+
+TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a
+fool are synonymous.
+
+CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater
+connection between pedant and fool.
+
+TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly.
+
+CLI. And study adds to nature in the other.
+
+TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value.
+
+CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence.
+
+TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly
+take up arms in its defence.
+
+CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with
+learned people of a certain kind.
+
+TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them
+well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind.
+
+CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a
+question with certain people.
+
+PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir....
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough
+without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an
+adversary, and as I fight I retreat.
+
+ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers....
+
+CLI. Another ally! I quit the field.
+
+PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no
+one in particular.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can
+bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many
+other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it.
+
+TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this
+contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The
+court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a
+certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he
+takes up its defence.
+
+CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great
+indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it;
+making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for
+its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success.
+Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which
+your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you,
+to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is
+not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has
+good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can
+be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without
+flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry.
+
+TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir.
+
+CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad?
+
+TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour
+to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no
+notice from the court.
+
+CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you
+forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me
+what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their
+writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible
+injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours
+on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France!
+and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These
+wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed
+and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the
+state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that
+at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured
+down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon
+them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think
+themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have
+said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and
+ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming
+themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the
+indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in
+books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for
+all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything,
+void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they
+decry everywhere true learning and knowledge.
+
+PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows
+the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which
+excites in your breast....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN.
+
+JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and
+whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this
+letter.
+
+PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a
+piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a
+servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the
+household to be introduced.
+
+JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book.
+
+PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry
+your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your
+wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage
+before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While
+you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in
+all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus,
+where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has
+pilfered._"
+
+We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I
+have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an
+action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it
+does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your
+master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I
+set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I
+esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this
+gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN).
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may
+assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you
+to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister
+of my decision.
+
+ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman
+will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her
+heart to rebellion.
+
+PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring
+her to a sense of her duty.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite
+according to your views.
+
+CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety
+upon your mind.
+
+ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful.
+
+CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation.
+
+ARM. I hope it may be so.
+
+CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help.
+
+ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power.
+
+CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for
+your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in
+favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in
+the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin?
+
+ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is
+carrying it off over the head of his rival.
+
+CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night.
+
+CHRY. To-night?
+
+CLI. Yes, to-night.
+
+CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have
+you both married.
+
+CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract.
+
+CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up.
+
+CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to
+which she must look forward.
+
+CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for
+this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master
+but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will
+return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my
+son-in-law.
+
+HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition.
+
+ARI. I will do everything to serve your love.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my
+greatest hope is in your constancy.
+
+HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love.
+
+CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that.
+
+HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me.
+
+CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to
+fear.
+
+HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes,
+and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have
+resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else.
+
+CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of
+your love.
+
+
+
+
+ACT V.
+
+SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN.
+
+
+HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon
+that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that,
+seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you
+listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a
+considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has
+no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly
+grandeur should not show itself in your words only.
+
+TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your
+dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble
+air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows
+and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured.
+
+HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and
+to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one
+can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You
+know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that
+Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much
+less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice
+of a husband, and that with your many talents you ought to please me.
+I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that
+reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness.
+
+TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give
+me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I
+have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved.
+
+HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by
+your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my
+confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which
+springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but
+is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases
+us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love,
+all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus
+guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the
+violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of
+honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he
+feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and
+will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to
+exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up
+your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so
+precious as yours.
+
+TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it
+can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be
+loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms....
+
+HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so
+many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses
+you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that....
+
+TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is
+only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the
+adorable Henriette.
+
+HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you....
+
+TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love,
+ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can
+put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty
+condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who
+wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining
+such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little
+to me how it comes to pass.
+
+HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by
+using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry
+a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain
+revenge that a husband should fear.
+
+TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A
+philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all
+vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from
+minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for
+Wives,' act iv. scene vi.]
+
+HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that
+philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with
+constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit
+subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in
+giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the
+truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another;
+and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the
+happiness of seeing you my husband.
+
+TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end.
+In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your
+duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach
+your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is
+Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house
+again.
+
+HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to
+change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved,
+and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do
+not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having
+her own way.
+
+CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby?
+
+HEN. Heaven forbid!
+
+CHRY. Am I a fool, pray?
+
+HEN. I do not say that.
+
+CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense?
+
+HEN. No, father.
+
+CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home?
+
+HEN. Of course.
+
+CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the
+nose?
+
+HEN. Oh dear, no, father.
+
+CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me
+as you do!
+
+HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally.
+
+CHRY. My will is law in this place.
+
+HEN. Certainly, father.
+
+CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command.
+
+HEN. Yes, you are right, father.
+
+CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family.
+
+HEN. Agreed.
+
+CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand.
+
+HEN. Yes, indeed, father.
+
+CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you.
+
+HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary.
+
+CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your
+father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey.
+
+HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to
+you is my earnest wish.
+
+CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will.
+
+CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her.
+
+CHRY. Back me up, all of you.
+
+MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY,
+CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style,
+and give us a contract couched in noble language?
+
+NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to
+try and change a single word.
+
+BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for
+learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to
+have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date
+in Ides and Kalends.
+
+NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would
+hiss me.
+
+PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit
+down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares
+to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to
+know?
+
+CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do.
+
+NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride?
+
+PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage.
+
+NOT. Good.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is
+Henriette.
+
+NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom?
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give
+her.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry
+is this gentleman.
+
+NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down
+Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre.
+
+NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is
+to be the future husband.
+
+PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice.
+
+CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will.
+
+NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes.
+
+CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of
+the wealth which is in my family.
+
+PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it
+were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man.
+
+CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre.
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband
+she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing
+is settled.
+
+CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone.
+
+MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up
+the lead to the men in everything.
+
+CHRY. That is well said.
+
+MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the
+hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there.
+
+CHRY. Just so.
+
+MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his
+wife wears the breeches.
+
+CHRY. It is perfectly true.
+
+MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master
+of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the
+henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke
+too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on
+the ear, he made me pitch it lower.
+
+CHRY. You speak as you ought.
+
+MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter.
+
+CHRY. Certainly.
+
+MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in
+order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about
+something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares
+neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin.
+
+CHRY. Excellent.
+
+PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease.
+
+MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have
+said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my
+husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books
+agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to
+anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who
+doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in
+short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this
+scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly
+at times.]
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened
+patiently enough to your worthy interpreter?
+
+CHRY. She has only said the truth.
+
+PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed.
+(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be
+united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply;
+and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister.
+
+CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE
+and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent?
+
+HEN. How! father...!
+
+CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...!
+
+BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are
+establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star;
+the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE,
+TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE.
+
+ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad
+tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me
+bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney.
+(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons.
+
+PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us?
+
+ARI. You can read it in this letter.
+
+PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it
+will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself.
+The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause
+that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have
+altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_
+
+CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost!
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no
+way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind
+wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost
+you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with
+all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for
+criminals.
+
+ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest
+against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the
+court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs."
+
+PHI. Let us see the other.
+
+CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts
+me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you
+had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon,
+and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O
+Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment!
+
+PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the
+truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he
+still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and
+please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth
+will be sufficient for us and for him.
+
+TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further.
+I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no
+intention of forcing the wills of others.
+
+PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of
+fortune.
+
+TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to
+relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for
+a heart that will not surrender itself.
+
+PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto
+refused to believe.
+
+TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how
+you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of
+the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of
+more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble
+servant. (_Exit_.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE,
+CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little
+like a philosopher he has acted.
+
+CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my
+destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess.
+
+PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward
+your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection....
+
+HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist
+your will.
+
+CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody
+for me....
+
+HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired
+you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw
+that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such
+reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity.
+
+CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery.
+
+HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the
+torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more
+than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of
+all the sorrows that follow such an engagement.
+
+ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason
+which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre?
+
+HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with
+all my heart.
+
+ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news
+I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to
+serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her
+philosopher would prove when put to the test.
+
+CHRY. Heaven be praised!
+
+PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly
+deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to
+see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her.
+
+ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love?
+
+PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your
+philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned.
+
+BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart.
+Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they
+repent ever after.
+
+CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up
+the contract in accordance with what I said.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+Copyright laws are changing all over the world. Be sure to check the
+copyright laws for your country before downloading or redistributing
+this or any other Project Gutenberg eBook.
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+*****These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!*****
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+Title: The Learned Women
+
+Author: Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+Release Date: August, 2005 [EBook #8772]
+[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule]
+[This file was first posted on August 12, 2003]
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+Edition: 10
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+Language: English
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+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP
+
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN
+
+(LES FEMMES SAVANTES)
+
+
+BY
+
+MOLIERE
+
+
+TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE.
+
+_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_
+
+
+BY
+
+CHARLES HERON WALL
+
+
+
+The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see
+vol. i. p. 153).
+
+Moliere acted the part of Chrysale.
+
+
+
+
+PERSONS REPRESENTED
+
+CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_
+
+PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE
+
+ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_
+
+ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE
+
+BELISE, _his sister_
+
+CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE
+
+TRISSOTIN, _a wit_
+
+VADIUS, _a learned man_
+
+MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_
+
+LEPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE
+
+JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS
+
+A NOTARY.
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN.
+
+
+
+
+ACT I.
+
+SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+
+ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of
+maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can
+enter your head!
+
+HEN. Yes, sister.
+
+ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings
+of disgust?
+
+HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to....
+
+ARM. Ah! Fie!
+
+HEN. What?
+
+ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very
+mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a
+repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before
+it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which
+this word implies?
+
+HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I
+only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and
+I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one
+shudder.
+
+ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you?
+
+HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves
+me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the
+delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you
+see no attraction in such a bond?
+
+ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you
+act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think
+of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a
+husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the
+low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour
+to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and
+matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the
+cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is
+everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove
+yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which
+is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous
+pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind.
+Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself,
+sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of
+mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the
+animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level
+of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which
+should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many
+women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities.
+
+HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill
+different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of
+materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar
+to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned
+men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its
+weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with
+the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different
+instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will
+inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will
+taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths,
+we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble
+longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the
+productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more
+material.
+
+ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side
+we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model,
+sister, to cough and spit like her.
+
+HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our
+mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that
+her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray,
+leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by
+wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the
+world.
+
+ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of
+taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend
+to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre?
+
+HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I
+have made?
+
+ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the
+conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that
+Clitandre has publicly sighed for me.
+
+HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not
+share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony,
+and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no
+pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has
+such pretensions?
+
+ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon
+us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a
+husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of
+our admirers.
+
+HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have
+only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it.
+
+ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected
+lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me
+can be dead in his heart?
+
+HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him.
+
+ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when
+he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but
+deceives himself.
+
+HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to
+discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point
+he will be sure to give us full information.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me.
+Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which
+of us has a claim upon your love.
+
+ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an
+explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how
+perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses.
+
+CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to
+speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge
+before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me
+(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this
+side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished
+things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender
+sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an
+immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had
+made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over
+my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked
+elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel.
+(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds
+will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with
+compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you
+had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing
+which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never
+to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this
+gentle bondage.
+
+ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in
+short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous
+that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to
+declare it to me.
+
+HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so
+much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can
+restrain the madness of anger?
+
+ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you
+respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received
+leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you
+to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their
+choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is
+criminal in you to dispose of it yourself.
+
+HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my
+duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced;
+and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see
+that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I
+have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me
+the power of loving you without a crime.
+
+CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind
+permission from you.
+
+ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me
+pain.
+
+HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will
+always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons
+you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far
+from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use
+your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will
+by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech
+you to do so; and in order to secure this end....
+
+ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you
+seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you.
+
+HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked
+by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even
+condescend to do so.
+
+ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating.
+
+HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback.
+
+CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of
+her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave,
+I will go to your father, to....
+
+HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father
+easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he
+himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness
+which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who
+governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she
+has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more
+pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall
+in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem.
+
+CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in
+your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female
+doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of
+everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of
+wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that
+she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In
+short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without
+publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of
+pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly
+respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make
+myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she
+bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and
+wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such
+a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings
+are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the
+markets with wastepaper.
+
+HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is
+unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he
+possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to
+yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is
+engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have
+nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house.
+
+CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot
+consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising
+his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice,
+and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he
+writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the
+persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good
+opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at
+all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings
+of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all
+the honours of the greatest general.
+
+HEN. You have good eyes to see all that.
+
+CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with
+which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I
+pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a
+man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of
+the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be
+Trissotin--and I won my wager.
+
+HEN. What a tale!
+
+CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your
+aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my
+heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--BELISE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to
+reveal to you his sincere devotion....
+
+BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me;
+although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no
+interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language
+desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my
+charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your
+secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but
+if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my
+sight.
+
+CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is,
+Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to
+favour the love I have for her.
+
+BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle
+evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over,
+I have never met with anything more ingenious.
+
+CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my
+heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the
+ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains;
+and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much
+towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will
+condescend to second my addresses.
+
+BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I
+understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and
+not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against
+matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your
+love returned.
+
+CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will
+you persist in believing what is not?
+
+BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what
+your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am
+content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and
+that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to
+suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by
+honour, offer only pure vows on my altars.
+
+CLI. But....
+
+BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more
+than I wished to say.
+
+CLI. But your error....
+
+BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear.
+
+CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Moliere ends
+this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to
+find a rhyme to _davantage._]
+
+BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_)
+
+Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so
+preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of
+more sense.
+
+
+
+ACT II.
+
+SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to
+him_).
+
+
+Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press,
+insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say
+when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he
+desires! Never....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Good day to you, brother.
+
+CHRY. And to you also, brother.
+
+ARI. Do you know what brings me here?
+
+CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to
+tell me.
+
+ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now?
+
+CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house.
+
+ARI. And what do you think of him?
+
+CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and
+uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit.
+
+ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see
+the esteem you have for him.
+
+CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome.
+
+ARI. Ah!
+
+CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman.
+
+ARI. So it is said.
+
+CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word,
+we were, both of us, very gay young fellows.
+
+ARI. I believe it.
+
+CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke
+of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you.
+
+ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--BELISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE,
+ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has
+fallen in love with Henriette.
+
+CHRY. What! with my daughter?
+
+ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover
+so smitten!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the
+story, and the thing is not as you imagine.
+
+ARI. How so, sister?
+
+BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love.
+
+ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking.
+
+BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth.
+
+ARI. He told me so himself.
+
+BEL. Doubtless.
+
+ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her
+father.
+
+BEL. Yes, I know.
+
+ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time
+of an alliance so desired by him.
+
+BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been
+employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an
+ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the
+mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both.
+
+ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves.
+
+BEL. You wish to know?
+
+ARI. Yes; who is it?  BEL. Me!
+
+ARI. You!
+
+BEL. Myself.
+
+ARI. Come, I say! sister!
+
+BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so
+wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to
+have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante,
+Damis, Cleonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms.
+
+ARI. Do those men love you?
+
+BEL. Yes; with all their might.
+
+ARI. They have told you so?
+
+BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present
+time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their
+love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering
+their hearts and lives to me.
+
+ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here.
+
+BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission.
+
+ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere.
+
+BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion.
+
+ARI. Cleonte and Lycidas are both married.
+
+BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love.
+
+ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions.
+
+CHRY. (to BELISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies.
+
+BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle
+fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at
+those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted
+to idle fancies.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy.
+
+ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that
+brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage.
+Tell me what answer we can make to his love.
+
+CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider
+his alliance a great honour.
+
+ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that....
+
+CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and
+that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one
+mind in two bodies.
+
+ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable
+to....
+
+CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have
+her agree to it also. Let us go....
+
+CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife,
+and take the business upon myself.
+
+ARI. But....
+
+CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare
+her this moment.
+
+ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and
+will return to know....
+
+CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to
+my wife about it.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a
+dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other
+folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no
+inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.]
+
+CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine?
+
+MAR. What is the matter?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir.
+
+CHRY. Sent away?
+
+MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out.
+
+CHRY. I don't understand; why has she?
+
+MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go.
+
+CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife
+is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick,
+leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again.
+
+CHRY. Gently.
+
+PHI. No; I will have it so.
+
+CHRY. What?
+
+PHI. I insist upon her going.
+
+CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way
+to...?
+
+PHI. What! you take her part?
+
+CHRY. Certainly not.
+
+PHI. You side with her against me?
+
+CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of.
+
+PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause?
+
+CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with  servants....
+
+PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you.
+
+CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary?
+
+PHI. I will have no opposition to my will.
+
+CHRY. Agreed.
+
+PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against
+her, and share my anger.
+
+CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right
+in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be
+forgiven.
+
+MAR. What is it I have done, then?
+
+CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know.
+
+PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing.
+
+CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some
+china?
+
+PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you
+fancy that I should get angry for so little?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then?
+
+PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable?
+
+CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish
+to be stolen from us?
+
+PHI. That would be of little moment.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE)
+What! has she shown herself dishonest?
+
+PHI. It is worse than that.
+
+CHRY. Worse than that?
+
+PHI. Worse.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) What! has she...?
+
+PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons,
+insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned
+in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born
+about 1585; died 1650.]
+
+CHRY. Is that...?
+
+PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the
+foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and
+makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws.
+
+CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime.
+
+PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable?
+
+CHRY. Yes, yes.
+
+PHI. I should like to see you excuse her.
+
+CHRY. Heaven forbid!
+
+BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet
+she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language.
+
+MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't
+understand your jargon, not I.
+
+PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on
+reason and polite custom a jargon!
+
+MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your
+fine speeches don't do me no good.
+
+PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no
+good!_
+
+BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we
+daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting
+_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as
+you have been told, a negative too many.
+
+MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as
+they speaks in our place.
+
+PHI. Ah! who can bear it?
+
+BEL. What a horrible solecism!
+
+PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear.
+
+BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding;
+_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular.
+Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in
+Moliere's time was pronounced as _grand'mere_ is now. _Gammer_
+seems the nearest approach to this in English.]
+
+MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer?
+
+PHI. O heavens!
+
+BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told
+you a hundred times where the word comes from.
+
+MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise,
+[Footnote: In Moliere's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious
+little.
+
+BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the
+verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive.
+
+MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people.
+
+PHI. What martyrdom!
+
+BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree
+with each other.
+
+MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out?
+
+PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a
+discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away?
+
+CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go,
+don't provoke her, Martine.
+
+PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in
+quite an obliging tone.
+
+CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place.
+(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BELISE.
+
+CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of
+sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she
+has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle.
+
+PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to
+torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and
+reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of
+garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the
+gutters of all the market-places?
+
+BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls
+Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are
+either pleonasm or cacophony.
+
+CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of
+Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather
+that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the
+verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that
+she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on
+good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to
+make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words,
+might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote:
+Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.]
+
+PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one
+who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead
+of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the
+body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and
+ought we not to leave it far behind?
+
+CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it;
+_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me.
+
+BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you
+believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over
+the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to
+feed it with the juices of science.
+
+CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of
+but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude
+for....
+
+PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays
+strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the
+purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.]
+
+BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion.
+
+CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I
+will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad,
+and I am greatly troubled at....
+
+PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ BELISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least
+solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange
+ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except
+a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you
+should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors
+of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is
+enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are
+offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the
+moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we
+see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for
+many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the
+minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well,
+to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy,
+ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers
+were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew
+enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a
+doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived
+honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation,
+and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she
+worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from
+behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too
+deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest
+secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be
+known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus,
+Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain
+knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the
+soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in
+order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but
+the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole
+house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while
+reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In
+short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I
+am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this
+villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge
+clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all
+this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am
+speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and
+particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with
+his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying
+to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I
+believe that he is rather cracked.
+
+PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language.
+
+BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A
+reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more
+vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I
+hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon
+the spot.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+PHI. Have you any other shaft ready?
+
+CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak
+of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage;
+in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under
+good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of
+a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give
+Henriette a proper husband, who....
+
+PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you
+of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are
+blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the
+man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit
+better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have
+duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a
+word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the
+subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you
+have spoken to her.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a
+talk together.
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given
+her consent? Is the affair settled?
+
+CHRY. Not quite as yet.
+
+ARI. Does she refuse?
+
+CHRY. No.
+
+ARI. Then she hesitates?
+
+CHRY. Not in the least.
+
+ARI. What then?
+
+CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Another man for a son-in-law?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. What is his name?
+
+CHRY. Mr. Trissotin.
+
+ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin....
+
+CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin.
+
+ARI. And you have accepted him?
+
+CHRY. I? Heaven forbid!
+
+ARI. What did you say to it?
+
+CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself.
+
+ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end
+we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her?
+
+CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was
+better for me to say nothing.
+
+ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not
+ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let
+his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose
+anything she has resolved upon?
+
+CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a
+dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a
+terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of
+philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and
+her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over
+the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has
+taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a
+week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know
+where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of
+her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love.
+
+ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has
+absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her
+authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes
+the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer
+yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a
+man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage
+enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your
+daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is
+possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen
+Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom
+your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great
+philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody
+knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a
+shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice.
+
+CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a
+little more courage, brother.
+
+ARI. That's right.
+
+CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman.
+
+ARI. Good.
+
+CHRY. She has abused my gentleness.
+
+ARI. It is true.
+
+CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long.
+
+ARI. Certainly.
+
+CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter,
+and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my
+mind.
+
+ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be.
+
+CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to
+me directly, brother.
+
+ARI. I will go at once.
+
+CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at
+defiance.
+
+
+
+
+ACT III.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE.
+
+
+PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses;
+they should be weighed word by word.
+
+ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them.
+
+BEL. And I am dying for them.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to
+me.
+
+ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure.
+
+BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears.
+
+PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires.
+
+ARM. Lose no time.
+
+BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure.
+
+PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam,
+but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your
+court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since.
+
+PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its
+father.
+
+TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother.
+
+BEL. What wit he has!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you
+run away?
+
+HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse.
+
+PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing
+wonders.
+
+HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and
+witty things are not in my line.
+
+PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret
+which you must learn.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you,
+and your only care is to charm everybody.
+
+HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish....
+
+BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LEPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to
+sit down. (LEPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you
+fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium?
+
+BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall,
+and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point
+which we call the centre of gravity?
+
+LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LEPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown!
+
+TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass.
+
+ARM. Ah! wit is everything!
+
+BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._)
+
+PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast.
+
+TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of
+eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to
+join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet
+which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain
+delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think
+you will find the taste of it tolerably good.
+
+ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it.
+
+PHI. Let us quickly give audience.
+
+BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to
+read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry
+to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned.
+
+PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read.
+
+TRI. SONN....
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece.
+
+ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg.
+
+TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1]
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes--_
+
+[1]
+[The sonnet is not of Moliere's invention, but is to be found in
+_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris,
+1663. It is called, _Sonnet a Mademoiselle de Longueville, a present
+Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fievre quarte_. As, of necessity, the
+translation given above is not very literal, I append the original.
+
+  "Votre prudence est endormie,
+     De traiter magnifiquement,
+     Et de loger superbement,
+   Votre plus cruelle ennemie;
+
+   Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die,
+     De votre riche appartement,
+     Ou cette ingrate insolemment
+   Attaque votre belle vie!
+
+   Quoi! sans respecter votre rang,
+   Elle se prend a votre sang,
+     Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage!
+
+   Si vous la conduisez aux bains,
+     Sans la marchander davantage,
+   Noyez-la de vos propres mains."
+
+The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in
+Moliere's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently
+true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you,
+nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.]
+
+BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning!
+
+ARM. What a charming turn it has!
+
+PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses.
+
+ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is
+plunged_.
+
+BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of
+charms for me.
+
+PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs
+joined together sound admirably.
+
+BEL. Let us hear the rest.
+
+TRI.
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes_
+
+ARM. _Prudence asleep_!
+
+BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_!
+
+PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_!
+
+TRI.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!
+    From your apartment richly lined,
+  Where that ingrate's outrageous mind
+    At your fair life her javelin throws_.
+
+BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you.
+
+ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg.
+
+PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something
+which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint.
+
+ARM.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes
+    From your apartment richly lined_.
+How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the
+metaphor is introduced!
+
+PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what
+admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the
+passage is invaluable.
+
+ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_.
+
+BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy
+expression.
+
+ARM. I wish I had written it.
+
+BEL. It is worth a whole poem!
+
+PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it?
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh
+
+PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another
+should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips;
+_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will
+she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal
+more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I
+discover in it a hundred meanings.
+
+BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will
+she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you
+realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were
+writing something so witty?
+
+TRI. Ah! ah!
+
+ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful,
+unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her.
+
+PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to
+the triplets, I pray.
+
+ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg.
+
+TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_
+
+TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_
+
+TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever!
+
+TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._
+
+PHI. _Fair life!_
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _What! without heed for your high line,
+  She saps your blood with care malign..._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _Redoubling outrage night and day!
+     If to the bath you take her down,
+  Without a moment's haggling, pray,
+     With your own hands the miscreant drown._
+
+PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering.
+
+BEL. I faint.
+
+ARM. I die from pleasure.
+
+PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one.
+
+ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_
+
+BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_
+
+PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own
+hands, there, drown her there in the bath.
+
+ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty.
+
+BEL. One promenades through them with rapture.
+
+PHI. One treads on fine things only.
+
+ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses.
+
+TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you....
+
+PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more
+beautiful.
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has
+been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part!
+
+HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit
+does not depend on our will.
+
+TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you.
+
+HEN. No. I do not listen.
+
+PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram.
+
+TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY
+FRIENDS. [2]
+
+PHI. His titles have always something rare in them.
+
+ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit.
+
+TRI.
+  _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands,
+  E'en now it costs me more than half my lands,
+  And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Lais rides in triumph through the land..._
+
+[2]
+[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un
+carosse de couleur amarante, achete pour une dame.'_
+
+"L'amour si cherement m'a vendu son lien
+Qu'il me coute deja la moitie de mon bien,
+Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse,
+Ou tant d'or se releve en bosse,
+Qu'il etonne tout le pays,
+Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Lais,
+Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante,
+Dis plutot qu'il est de ma rente."]
+
+PHI. Ah! Lais! what erudition!
+
+BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million.
+
+TRI.
+  _And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Lais rides in triumph through the land,
+  Say no more it is amaranth,
+  Say rather it is o' my rent._
+
+ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected
+that?
+
+PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste.
+
+BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_!
+It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my
+rent_.
+
+PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I
+saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of
+your composition, we could admire in our turn.
+
+PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I
+shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of
+the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he
+wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I
+have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at
+the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will
+avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by
+confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime
+knowledge against us.
+
+ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to
+the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the
+beauties of lace, or of a new brocade.
+
+BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim
+our emancipation.
+
+TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I
+render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the
+splendour of their intellect.  PHI. And our sex does you justice in
+this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with
+proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they
+can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they
+wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to
+deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on
+all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to
+none.
+
+TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism.
+
+PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism.
+
+ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid.
+
+BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to
+understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter.
+
+TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism.
+
+ARM. I like his vortices.
+
+PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary
+here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than
+could be given except by very long notes.]
+
+ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves
+by some great discovery.
+
+TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has
+hidden few things from you.
+
+PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one
+discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon.
+
+BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have
+seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the
+day had boasted of having done this.]
+
+ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar,
+history, verse, ethics, and politics.
+
+PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly
+the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the
+Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder.
+
+ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and
+we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy,
+we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs
+and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are
+preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned
+meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to
+purge both prose and verse.
+
+PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise
+which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved
+by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all
+those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of
+scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous
+commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous
+ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted.
+
+TRI. These are indeed admirable projects.
+
+BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready.
+
+TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful.
+
+ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws,
+prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have
+wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with
+everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE.
+
+LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to
+speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone.
+(_They all rise._)
+
+TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him
+the honour of your acquaintance.
+
+PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us.   (TRISSOTIN
+_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BELISE). At least, let us do him
+all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is
+going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to
+you.
+
+HEN. But what about?
+
+PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Menage who
+is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In
+presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing
+a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits.
+
+PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value.
+
+TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows
+Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France.
+
+PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek,
+sister!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek!
+
+ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful!
+
+PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of
+Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BELISE _and_
+ARMANDE.)
+
+HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_)
+Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.)
+
+PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books.
+
+VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you
+to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some
+learned discourse.
+
+PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing.
+
+TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he
+could, if he chose, show you something.
+
+VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their
+productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms,
+or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for
+me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about
+begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers,
+often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been
+guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the
+opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any
+unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses
+for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion.
+
+TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others.
+
+VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours.  TRI. You have an easy
+style, and a fine choice of words.
+
+VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_.
+
+TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in
+sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil.
+
+VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves
+Horace far behind.
+
+TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets?
+
+VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write?
+
+TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus?
+
+VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals?
+
+TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad.
+
+VAD. And in _bouts-rimes_ I think you adorable.
+
+TRI. If France could appreciate your value--
+
+VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius--
+
+TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach.
+
+VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_
+TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to....
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon
+the Princess Urania's fever?
+
+VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday.
+
+TRI. Do you know the author of it?
+
+VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth,
+his sonnet is good for nothing.
+
+TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable.
+
+VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read
+it, you would think like me.
+
+TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few
+people are able to write such a sonnet.
+
+VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad!
+
+TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is
+that I am the author of it.
+
+VAD. You?
+
+TRI. Myself.
+
+VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened.
+
+TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you.
+
+VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader
+spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my
+ballad.
+
+TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer
+the fashion, and savours of ancient times.
+
+VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people.
+
+TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant.
+
+VAD. That does not make it worse.
+
+TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants.
+
+VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you.
+
+TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others.
+
+(_They all rise._)
+
+VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me.
+
+TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver!
+
+VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession!
+
+TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist!
+
+VAD. Go, you pedantic snob!
+
+PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about?
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks
+and Romans for all your shameful thefts.
+
+VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your
+verses.
+
+TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made.
+
+VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse.
+
+TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it.
+
+VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote:
+Boileau.]
+
+TRI. I, too, send you to him.
+
+VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him;
+he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors
+well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all
+his verses you are exposed to his attacks.
+
+TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the
+crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you
+the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately,
+as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and
+his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never
+thinks himself victorious.
+
+VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am.
+
+TRI. And mine will make you know your master.
+
+VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin.
+
+TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote:
+Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no
+doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.]
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in
+the sonnet he dares to attack.
+
+PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of
+something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been
+tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have
+thought of a means of remedying this defect.
+
+HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for
+learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much
+trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head,
+and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to
+have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to
+produce fine words.
+
+PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my
+intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face
+is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which
+only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and
+solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you
+the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of
+knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have
+at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius;
+(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I
+intend you to marry.
+
+HEN. Me, mother!
+
+PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little.
+
+BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for
+leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I
+yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you
+in society.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell
+you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me....
+
+HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry.
+
+PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You
+understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her
+alone for the present.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth;
+she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband....
+
+HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself?
+
+ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed.
+
+HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister.
+
+ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I
+would accept your offer with delight.
+
+HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an
+excellent one.
+
+ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have
+to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in
+vain do you think by resistance to....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my
+daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your
+glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your
+heart consider him as the man I want you to marry.
+
+ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister.
+
+HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over
+us.
+
+ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience.
+
+CHRY. What is the meaning of this?
+
+ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to
+agree on this point, and this other husband....
+
+CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please
+with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done,
+and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders!
+
+CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me!
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us;
+take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How
+moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age,
+and I can still remember my youthful loving days.
+
+
+
+
+ACT IV.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE.
+
+
+ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her
+obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She
+seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at
+defiance the will of her mother.
+
+PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason
+subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or
+body, form or matter.
+
+ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and
+that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite
+of yourself, behaves himself strangely.
+
+PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him
+well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always
+unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and
+yet he has never desired me to read anything to him.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and
+listening unseen_).
+
+ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's
+husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of
+speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think
+that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of
+philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can
+rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond
+all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not
+a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never
+could see that he had in his heart any respect for you.
+
+PHI. Poor idiot!
+
+ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in
+praising you.
+
+PHI. The churl!
+
+ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions,
+without his ever thinking them fine.
+
+PHI. The impertinent fellow!
+
+ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe
+what foolish things....
+
+CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at
+least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what
+am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to
+destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me
+odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great
+indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam,
+an impartial judge between us.
+
+ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find
+enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has
+such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose
+fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be
+compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless
+heart is a monster of immorality.
+
+CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your
+mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it
+imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the
+offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For
+two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care,
+duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my
+attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed
+to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another.
+Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after
+change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather
+turn me away?
+
+ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it
+of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the
+purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me
+keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense;
+and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in
+which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material
+passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you
+must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How
+far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The
+senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites
+the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame
+pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only
+sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is
+mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of
+loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their
+transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget.
+
+CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so,
+that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached
+to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this
+separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul
+go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that
+purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the
+soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But
+such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross
+and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given
+to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for
+lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble
+sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue;
+that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable
+and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without
+giving you cause to be offended at such a thought.
+
+ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say,
+your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a
+faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will,
+if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you
+wish.
+
+CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to
+return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I
+sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled
+when you disdained me.
+
+PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my
+consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it
+enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not
+expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny
+of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux
+esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to
+translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself
+beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed
+to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of
+the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives
+nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us.
+Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has
+made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid
+verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them.
+
+PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him
+with other eyes than you do.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We
+have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us,
+and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_.
+Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way
+it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so
+much glass.
+
+PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman
+would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and
+above all to hate intellect and knowledge.
+
+CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain
+myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils
+people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather
+be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain
+people.
+
+TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the
+contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything.
+
+CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and
+in deeds.
+
+TRI. The paradox is rather strong.
+
+CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very
+clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be
+wanting.
+
+TRI. You might cite some without proving your point.
+
+CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want.
+
+TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples.
+
+CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me.
+
+TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and
+not knowledge.
+
+CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is
+more of a fool than an ignorant one.
+
+TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a
+fool are synonymous.
+
+CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater
+connection between pedant and fool.
+
+TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly.
+
+CLI. And study adds to nature in the other.
+
+TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value.
+
+CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence.
+
+TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly
+take up arms in its defence.
+
+CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with
+learned people of a certain kind.
+
+TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them
+well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind.
+
+CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a
+question with certain people.
+
+PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir....
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough
+without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an
+adversary, and as I fight I retreat.
+
+ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers....
+
+CLI. Another ally! I quit the field.
+
+PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no
+one in particular.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can
+bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many
+other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it.
+
+TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this
+contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The
+court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a
+certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he
+takes up its defence.
+
+CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great
+indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it;
+making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for
+its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success.
+Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which
+your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you,
+to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is
+not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has
+good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can
+be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without
+flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry.
+
+TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir.
+
+CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad?
+
+TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour
+to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no
+notice from the court.
+
+CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you
+forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me
+what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their
+writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible
+injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours
+on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France!
+and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These
+wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed
+and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the
+state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that
+at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured
+down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon
+them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think
+themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have
+said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and
+ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming
+themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the
+indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in
+books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for
+all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything,
+void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they
+decry everywhere true learning and knowledge.
+
+PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows
+the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which
+excites in your breast....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN.
+
+JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and
+whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this
+letter.
+
+PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a
+piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a
+servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the
+household to be introduced.
+
+JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book.
+
+PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry
+your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your
+wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage
+before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While
+you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in
+all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus,
+where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has
+pilfered._"
+
+We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I
+have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an
+action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it
+does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your
+master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I
+set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I
+esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this
+gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN).
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may
+assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you
+to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister
+of my decision.
+
+ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman
+will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her
+heart to rebellion.
+
+PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring
+her to a sense of her duty.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite
+according to your views.
+
+CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety
+upon your mind.
+
+ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful.
+
+CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation.
+
+ARM. I hope it may be so.
+
+CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help.
+
+ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power.
+
+CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for
+your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in
+favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in
+the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin?
+
+ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is
+carrying it off over the head of his rival.
+
+CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night.
+
+CHRY. To-night?
+
+CLI. Yes, to-night.
+
+CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have
+you both married.
+
+CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract.
+
+CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up.
+
+CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to
+which she must look forward.
+
+CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for
+this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master
+but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will
+return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my
+son-in-law.
+
+HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition.
+
+ARI. I will do everything to serve your love.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my
+greatest hope is in your constancy.
+
+HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love.
+
+CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that.
+
+HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me.
+
+CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to
+fear.
+
+HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes,
+and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have
+resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else.
+
+CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of
+your love.
+
+
+
+
+ACT V.
+
+SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN.
+
+
+HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon
+that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that,
+seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you
+listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a
+considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has
+no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly
+grandeur should not show itself in your words only.
+
+TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your
+dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble
+air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows
+and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured.
+
+HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and
+to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one
+can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You
+know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that
+Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much
+less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice
+of a husband, and that with your many talents yon ought to please me.
+I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that
+reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness.
+
+TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give
+me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I
+have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved.
+
+HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by
+your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my
+confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which
+springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but
+is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases
+us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love,
+all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus
+guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the
+violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of
+honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he
+feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and
+will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to
+exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up
+your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so
+precious as yours.
+
+TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it
+can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be
+loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms....
+
+HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so
+many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses
+you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that....
+
+TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is
+only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the
+adorable Henriette.
+
+HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you....
+
+TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love,
+ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can
+put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty
+condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who
+wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining
+such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little
+to me how it comes to pass.
+
+HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by
+using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry
+a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain
+revenge that a husband should fear.
+
+TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A
+philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all
+vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from
+minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for
+Wives,' act iv. scene vi.]
+
+HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that
+philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with
+constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit
+subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in
+giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the
+truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another;
+and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the
+happiness of seeing you my husband.
+
+TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end.
+In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your
+duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach
+your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is
+Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house
+again.
+
+HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to
+change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved,
+and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do
+not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having
+her own way.
+
+CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby?
+
+HEN. Heaven forbid!
+
+CHRY. Am I a fool, pray?
+
+HEN. I do not say that.
+
+CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense?
+
+HEN. No, father.
+
+CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home?
+
+HEN. Of course.
+
+CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the
+nose?
+
+HEN. Oh dear, no, father.
+
+CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me
+as you do!
+
+HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally.
+
+CHRY. My will is law in this place.
+
+HEN. Certainly, father.
+
+CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command.
+
+HEN. Yes, you are right, father.
+
+CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family.
+
+HEN. Agreed.
+
+CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand.
+
+HEN. Yes, indeed, father.
+
+CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you.
+
+HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary.
+
+CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your
+father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey.
+
+HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to
+you is my earnest wish.
+
+CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will.
+
+CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her.
+
+CHRY. Back me up, all of you.
+
+MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY,
+CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style,
+and give us a contract couched in noble language?
+
+NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to
+try and change a single word.
+
+BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for
+learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to
+have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date
+in Ides and Kalends.
+
+NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would
+hiss me.
+
+PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit
+down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares
+to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to
+know?
+
+CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do.
+
+NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride?
+
+PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage.
+
+NOT. Good.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is
+Henriette.
+
+NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom?
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give
+her.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry
+is this gentleman.
+
+NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down
+Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre.
+
+NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is
+to be the future husband.
+
+PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice.
+
+CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will.
+
+NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes.
+
+CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of
+the wealth which is in my family.
+
+PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it
+were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man.
+
+CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre.
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband
+she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing
+is settled.
+
+CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone.
+
+MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up
+the lead to the men in everything.
+
+CHRY. That is well said.
+
+MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the
+hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there.
+
+CHRY. Just so.
+
+MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his
+wife wears the breeches.
+
+CHRY. It is perfectly true.
+
+MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master
+of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the
+henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke
+too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on
+the ear, he made me pitch it lower.
+
+CHRY. You speak as you ought.
+
+MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter.
+
+CHRY. Certainly.
+
+MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in
+order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about
+something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares
+neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin.
+
+CHRY. Excellent.
+
+PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease.
+
+MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have
+said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my
+husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books
+agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to
+anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who
+doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in
+short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this
+scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly
+at times.]
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened
+patiently enough to your worthy interpreter?
+
+CHRY. She has only said the truth.
+
+PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed.
+(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be
+united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply;
+and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister.
+
+CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE
+and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent?
+
+HEN. How! father...!
+
+CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...!
+
+BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are
+establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star;
+the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE,
+TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE.
+
+ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad
+tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me
+bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney.
+(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons.
+
+PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us?
+
+ARI. You can read it in this letter.
+
+PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it
+will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself.
+The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause
+that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have
+altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_
+
+CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost!
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no
+way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind
+wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost
+you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with
+all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for
+criminals.
+
+ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest
+against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the
+court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs."
+
+PHI. Let us see the other.
+
+CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts
+me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you
+had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon,
+and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O
+Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment!
+
+PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the
+truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he
+still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and
+please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth
+will be sufficient for us and for him.
+
+TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further.
+I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no
+intention of forcing the wills of others.
+
+PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of
+fortune.
+
+TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to
+relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for
+a heart that will not surrender itself.
+
+PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto
+refused to believe.
+
+TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how
+you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of
+the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of
+more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble
+servant. (_Exit_.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE,
+CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little
+like a philosopher he has acted.
+
+CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my
+destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess.
+
+PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward
+your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection....
+
+HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist
+your will.
+
+CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody
+for me....
+
+HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired
+you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw
+that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such
+reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity.
+
+CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery.
+
+HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the
+torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more
+than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of
+all the sorrows that follow such an engagement.
+
+ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason
+which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre?
+
+HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with
+all my heart.
+
+ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news
+I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to
+serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her
+philosopher would prove when put to the test.
+
+CHRY. Heaven be praised!
+
+PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly
+deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to
+see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her.
+
+ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love?
+
+PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your
+philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned.
+
+BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart.
+Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they
+repent ever after.
+
+CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up
+the contract in accordance with what I said.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
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+*****These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!*****
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+Title: The Learned Women
+
+Author: Moliere (Poquelin)
+
+Release Date: August, 2005 [EBook #8772]
+[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule]
+[This file was first posted on August 12, 2003]
+
+Edition: 10
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP
+
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN
+
+(LES FEMMES SAVANTES)
+
+
+BY
+
+MOLIÈRE
+
+
+TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE.
+
+_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_
+
+
+BY
+
+CHARLES HERON WALL
+
+
+
+The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see
+vol. i. p. 153).
+
+Molière acted the part of Chrysale.
+
+
+
+
+PERSONS REPRESENTED
+
+CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_
+
+PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE
+
+ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_
+
+ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE
+
+BÉLISE, _his sister_
+
+CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE
+
+TRISSOTIN, _a wit_
+
+VADIUS, _a learned man_
+
+MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_
+
+LÉPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE
+
+JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS
+
+A NOTARY.
+
+
+
+THE LEARNED WOMEN.
+
+
+
+
+ACT I.
+
+SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+
+ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of
+maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can
+enter your head!
+
+HEN. Yes, sister.
+
+ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings
+of disgust?
+
+HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to....
+
+ARM. Ah! Fie!
+
+HEN. What?
+
+ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very
+mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a
+repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before
+it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which
+this word implies?
+
+HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I
+only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and
+I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one
+shudder.
+
+ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you?
+
+HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves
+me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the
+delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you
+see no attraction in such a bond?
+
+ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you
+act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think
+of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a
+husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the
+low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour
+to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and
+matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the
+cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is
+everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove
+yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which
+is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous
+pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind.
+Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself,
+sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of
+mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the
+animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level
+of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which
+should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many
+women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities.
+
+HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill
+different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of
+materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar
+to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned
+men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its
+weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with
+the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different
+instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will
+inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will
+taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths,
+we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble
+longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the
+productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more
+material.
+
+ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side
+we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model,
+sister, to cough and spit like her.
+
+HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our
+mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that
+her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray,
+leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by
+wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the
+world.
+
+ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of
+taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend
+to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre?
+
+HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I
+have made?
+
+ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the
+conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that
+Clitandre has publicly sighed for me.
+
+HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not
+share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony,
+and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no
+pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has
+such pretensions?
+
+ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon
+us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a
+husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of
+our admirers.
+
+HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have
+only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it.
+
+ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected
+lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me
+can be dead in his heart?
+
+HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him.
+
+ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when
+he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but
+deceives himself.
+
+HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to
+discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point
+he will be sure to give us full information.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me.
+Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which
+of us has a claim upon your love.
+
+ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an
+explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how
+perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses.
+
+CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to
+speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge
+before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me
+(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this
+side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished
+things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender
+sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an
+immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had
+made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over
+my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked
+elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel.
+(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds
+will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with
+compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you
+had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing
+which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never
+to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this
+gentle bondage.
+
+ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in
+short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous
+that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to
+declare it to me.
+
+HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so
+much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can
+restrain the madness of anger?
+
+ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you
+respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received
+leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you
+to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their
+choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is
+criminal in you to dispose of it yourself.
+
+HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my
+duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced;
+and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see
+that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I
+have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me
+the power of loving you without a crime.
+
+CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind
+permission from you.
+
+ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me
+pain.
+
+HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will
+always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons
+you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far
+from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use
+your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will
+by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech
+you to do so; and in order to secure this end....
+
+ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you
+seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you.
+
+HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked
+by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even
+condescend to do so.
+
+ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating.
+
+HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback.
+
+CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of
+her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave,
+I will go to your father, to....
+
+HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father
+easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he
+himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness
+which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who
+governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she
+has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more
+pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall
+in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem.
+
+CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in
+your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female
+doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of
+everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of
+wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that
+she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In
+short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without
+publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of
+pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly
+respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make
+myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she
+bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and
+wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such
+a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings
+are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the
+markets with wastepaper.
+
+HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is
+unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he
+possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to
+yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is
+engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have
+nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house.
+
+CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot
+consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising
+his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice,
+and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he
+writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the
+persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good
+opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at
+all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings
+of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all
+the honours of the greatest general.
+
+HEN. You have good eyes to see all that.
+
+CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with
+which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I
+pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a
+man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of
+the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be
+Trissotin--and I won my wager.
+
+HEN. What a tale!
+
+CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your
+aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my
+heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--BÉLISE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to
+reveal to you his sincere devotion....
+
+BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me;
+although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no
+interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language
+desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my
+charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your
+secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but
+if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my
+sight.
+
+CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is,
+Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to
+favour the love I have for her.
+
+BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle
+evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over,
+I have never met with anything more ingenious.
+
+CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my
+heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the
+ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains;
+and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much
+towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will
+condescend to second my addresses.
+
+BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I
+understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and
+not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against
+matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your
+love returned.
+
+CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will
+you persist in believing what is not?
+
+BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what
+your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am
+content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and
+that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to
+suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by
+honour, offer only pure vows on my altars.
+
+CLI. But....
+
+BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more
+than I wished to say.
+
+CLI. But your error....
+
+BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear.
+
+CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Molière ends
+this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to
+find a rhyme to _davantage._]
+
+BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_)
+
+Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so
+preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of
+more sense.
+
+
+
+ACT II.
+
+SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to
+him_).
+
+
+Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press,
+insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say
+when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he
+desires! Never....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Good day to you, brother.
+
+CHRY. And to you also, brother.
+
+ARI. Do you know what brings me here?
+
+CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to
+tell me.
+
+ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now?
+
+CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house.
+
+ARI. And what do you think of him?
+
+CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and
+uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit.
+
+ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see
+the esteem you have for him.
+
+CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome.
+
+ARI. Ah!
+
+CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman.
+
+ARI. So it is said.
+
+CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word,
+we were, both of us, very gay young fellows.
+
+ARI. I believe it.
+
+CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke
+of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you.
+
+ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--BÉLISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE,
+ARISTE.
+
+ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has
+fallen in love with Henriette.
+
+CHRY. What! with my daughter?
+
+ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover
+so smitten!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the
+story, and the thing is not as you imagine.
+
+ARI. How so, sister?
+
+BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love.
+
+ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking.
+
+BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth.
+
+ARI. He told me so himself.
+
+BEL. Doubtless.
+
+ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her
+father.
+
+BEL. Yes, I know.
+
+ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time
+of an alliance so desired by him.
+
+BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been
+employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an
+ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the
+mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both.
+
+ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves.
+
+BEL. You wish to know?
+
+ARI. Yes; who is it?  BEL. Me!
+
+ARI. You!
+
+BEL. Myself.
+
+ARI. Come, I say! sister!
+
+BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so
+wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to
+have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante,
+Damis, Cléonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms.
+
+ARI. Do those men love you?
+
+BEL. Yes; with all their might.
+
+ARI. They have told you so?
+
+BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present
+time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their
+love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering
+their hearts and lives to me.
+
+ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here.
+
+BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission.
+
+ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere.
+
+BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion.
+
+ARI. Cléonte and Lycidas are both married.
+
+BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love.
+
+ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions.
+
+CHRY. (to BÉLISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies.
+
+BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle
+fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at
+those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted
+to idle fancies.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE.
+
+CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy.
+
+ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that
+brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage.
+Tell me what answer we can make to his love.
+
+CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider
+his alliance a great honour.
+
+ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that....
+
+CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and
+that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one
+mind in two bodies.
+
+ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable
+to....
+
+CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have
+her agree to it also. Let us go....
+
+CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife,
+and take the business upon myself.
+
+ARI. But....
+
+CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare
+her this moment.
+
+ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and
+will return to know....
+
+CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to
+my wife about it.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a
+dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other
+folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no
+inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.]
+
+CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine?
+
+MAR. What is the matter?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir.
+
+CHRY. Sent away?
+
+MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out.
+
+CHRY. I don't understand; why has she?
+
+MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go.
+
+CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife
+is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick,
+leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again.
+
+CHRY. Gently.
+
+PHI. No; I will have it so.
+
+CHRY. What?
+
+PHI. I insist upon her going.
+
+CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way
+to...?
+
+PHI. What! you take her part?
+
+CHRY. Certainly not.
+
+PHI. You side with her against me?
+
+CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of.
+
+PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause?
+
+CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with  servants....
+
+PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you.
+
+CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary?
+
+PHI. I will have no opposition to my will.
+
+CHRY. Agreed.
+
+PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against
+her, and share my anger.
+
+CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right
+in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be
+forgiven.
+
+MAR. What is it I have done, then?
+
+CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know.
+
+PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing.
+
+CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some
+china?
+
+PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you
+fancy that I should get angry for so little?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then?
+
+PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable?
+
+CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish
+to be stolen from us?
+
+PHI. That would be of little moment.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE)
+What! has she shown herself dishonest?
+
+PHI. It is worse than that.
+
+CHRY. Worse than that?
+
+PHI. Worse.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) What! has she...?
+
+PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons,
+insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned
+in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born
+about 1585; died 1650.]
+
+CHRY. Is that...?
+
+PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the
+foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and
+makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws.
+
+CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime.
+
+PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable?
+
+CHRY. Yes, yes.
+
+PHI. I should like to see you excuse her.
+
+CHRY. Heaven forbid!
+
+BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet
+she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language.
+
+MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't
+understand your jargon, not I.
+
+PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on
+reason and polite custom a jargon!
+
+MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your
+fine speeches don't do me no good.
+
+PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no
+good!_
+
+BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we
+daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting
+_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as
+you have been told, a negative too many.
+
+MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as
+they speaks in our place.
+
+PHI. Ah! who can bear it?
+
+BEL. What a horrible solecism!
+
+PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear.
+
+BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding;
+_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular.
+Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in
+Molière's time was pronounced as _grand'mère_ is now. _Gammer_
+seems the nearest approach to this in English.]
+
+MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer?
+
+PHI. O heavens!
+
+BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told
+you a hundred times where the word comes from.
+
+MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise,
+[Footnote: In Molière's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious
+little.
+
+BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the
+verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive.
+
+MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people.
+
+PHI. What martyrdom!
+
+BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree
+with each other.
+
+MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out?
+
+PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a
+discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away?
+
+CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go,
+don't provoke her, Martine.
+
+PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in
+quite an obliging tone.
+
+CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place.
+(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BÉLISE.
+
+CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of
+sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she
+has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle.
+
+PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to
+torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and
+reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of
+garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the
+gutters of all the market-places?
+
+BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls
+Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are
+either pleonasm or cacophony.
+
+CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of
+Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather
+that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the
+verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that
+she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on
+good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to
+make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words,
+might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote:
+Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.]
+
+PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one
+who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead
+of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the
+body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and
+ought we not to leave it far behind?
+
+CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it;
+_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me.
+
+BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you
+believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over
+the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to
+feed it with the juices of science.
+
+CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of
+but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude
+for....
+
+PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays
+strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the
+purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.]
+
+BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion.
+
+CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I
+will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad,
+and I am greatly troubled at....
+
+PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this?
+
+CHRY. (_to_ BÉLISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least
+solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange
+ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except
+a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you
+should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors
+of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is
+enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are
+offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the
+moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we
+see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for
+many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the
+minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well,
+to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy,
+ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers
+were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew
+enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a
+doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived
+honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation,
+and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she
+worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from
+behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too
+deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest
+secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be
+known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus,
+Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain
+knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the
+soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in
+order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but
+the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole
+house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while
+reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In
+short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I
+am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this
+villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge
+clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all
+this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am
+speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and
+particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with
+his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying
+to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I
+believe that he is rather cracked.
+
+PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language.
+
+BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A
+reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more
+vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I
+hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon
+the spot.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+PHI. Have you any other shaft ready?
+
+CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak
+of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage;
+in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under
+good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of
+a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give
+Henriette a proper husband, who....
+
+PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you
+of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are
+blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the
+man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit
+better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have
+duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a
+word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the
+subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you
+have spoken to her.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE.
+
+ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a
+talk together.
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given
+her consent? Is the affair settled?
+
+CHRY. Not quite as yet.
+
+ARI. Does she refuse?
+
+CHRY. No.
+
+ARI. Then she hesitates?
+
+CHRY. Not in the least.
+
+ARI. What then?
+
+CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law.
+
+ARI. Another man for a son-in-law?
+
+CHRY. Yes.
+
+ARI. What is his name?
+
+CHRY. Mr. Trissotin.
+
+ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin....
+
+CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin.
+
+ARI. And you have accepted him?
+
+CHRY. I? Heaven forbid!
+
+ARI. What did you say to it?
+
+CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself.
+
+ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end
+we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her?
+
+CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was
+better for me to say nothing.
+
+ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not
+ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let
+his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose
+anything she has resolved upon?
+
+CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a
+dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a
+terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of
+philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and
+her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over
+the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has
+taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a
+week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know
+where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of
+her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love.
+
+ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has
+absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her
+authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes
+the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer
+yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a
+man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage
+enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your
+daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is
+possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen
+Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom
+your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great
+philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody
+knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a
+shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice.
+
+CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a
+little more courage, brother.
+
+ARI. That's right.
+
+CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman.
+
+ARI. Good.
+
+CHRY. She has abused my gentleness.
+
+ARI. It is true.
+
+CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long.
+
+ARI. Certainly.
+
+CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter,
+and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my
+mind.
+
+ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be.
+
+CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to
+me directly, brother.
+
+ARI. I will go at once.
+
+CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at
+defiance.
+
+
+
+
+ACT III.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE.
+
+
+PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses;
+they should be weighed word by word.
+
+ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them.
+
+BEL. And I am dying for them.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to
+me.
+
+ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure.
+
+BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears.
+
+PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires.
+
+ARM. Lose no time.
+
+BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure.
+
+PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam,
+but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your
+court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since.
+
+PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its
+father.
+
+TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother.
+
+BEL. What wit he has!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you
+run away?
+
+HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse.
+
+PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing
+wonders.
+
+HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and
+witty things are not in my line.
+
+PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret
+which you must learn.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you,
+and your only care is to charm everybody.
+
+HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish....
+
+BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to
+sit down. (LÉPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you
+fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium?
+
+BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall,
+and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point
+which we call the centre of gravity?
+
+LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground.
+
+PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown!
+
+TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass.
+
+ARM. Ah! wit is everything!
+
+BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._)
+
+PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast.
+
+TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of
+eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to
+join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet
+which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain
+delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think
+you will find the taste of it tolerably good.
+
+ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it.
+
+PHI. Let us quickly give audience.
+
+BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to
+read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry
+to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned.
+
+PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read.
+
+TRI. SONN....
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece.
+
+ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg.
+
+TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1]
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes--_
+
+[1]
+[The sonnet is not of Molière's invention, but is to be found in
+_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris,
+1663. It is called, _Sonnet à Mademoiselle de Longueville, à présent
+Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fièvre quarte_. As, of necessity, the
+translation given above is not very literal, I append the original.
+
+  "Votre prudence est endormie,
+     De traiter magnifiquement,
+     Et de loger superbement,
+   Votre plus cruelle ennemie;
+
+   Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die,
+     De votre riche appartement,
+     Où cette ingrate insolemment
+   Attaque votre belle vie!
+
+   Quoi! sans respecter votre rang,
+   Elle se prend à votre sang,
+     Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage!
+
+   Si vous la conduisez aux bains,
+     Sans la marchander davantage,
+   Noyez-la de vos propres mains."
+
+The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in
+Molière's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently
+true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you,
+nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.]
+
+BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning!
+
+ARM. What a charming turn it has!
+
+PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses.
+
+ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is
+plunged_.
+
+BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of
+charms for me.
+
+PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs
+joined together sound admirably.
+
+BEL. Let us hear the rest.
+
+TRI.
+  _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose
+    Is plunged; if thus superbly kind,
+  A lodging gorgeously you can find
+    For the most cruel of your foes_
+
+ARM. _Prudence asleep_!
+
+BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_!
+
+PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_!
+
+TRI.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!
+    From your apartment richly lined,
+  Where that ingrate's outrageous mind
+    At your fair life her javelin throws_.
+
+BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you.
+
+ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg.
+
+PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something
+which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint.
+
+ARM.
+  _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes
+    From your apartment richly lined_.
+How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the
+metaphor is introduced!
+
+PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what
+admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the
+passage is invaluable.
+
+ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_.
+
+BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy
+expression.
+
+ARM. I wish I had written it.
+
+BEL. It is worth a whole poem!
+
+PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it?
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh
+
+PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another
+should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips;
+_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will
+she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal
+more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I
+discover in it a hundred meanings.
+
+BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply.
+
+PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will
+she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you
+realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were
+writing something so witty?
+
+TRI. Ah! ah!
+
+ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful,
+unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her.
+
+PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to
+the triplets, I pray.
+
+ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg.
+
+TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_
+
+TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_
+
+TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever!
+
+TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._
+
+PHI. _Fair life!_
+
+ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _What! without heed for your high line,
+  She saps your blood with care malign..._
+
+PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah!
+
+TRI.
+  _Redoubling outrage night and day!
+     If to the bath you take her down,
+  Without a moment's haggling, pray,
+     With your own hands the miscreant drown._
+
+PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering.
+
+BEL. I faint.
+
+ARM. I die from pleasure.
+
+PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one.
+
+ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_
+
+BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_
+
+PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own
+hands, there, drown her there in the bath.
+
+ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty.
+
+BEL. One promenades through them with rapture.
+
+PHI. One treads on fine things only.
+
+ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses.
+
+TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you....
+
+PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more
+beautiful.
+
+BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has
+been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part!
+
+HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit
+does not depend on our will.
+
+TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you.
+
+HEN. No. I do not listen.
+
+PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram.
+
+TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY
+FRIENDS. [2]
+
+PHI. His titles have always something rare in them.
+
+ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit.
+
+TRI.
+  _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands,
+  E'en now it costs me more than half my lands,
+  And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Laïs rides in triumph through the land..._
+
+[2]
+[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un
+carosse de couleur amarante, acheté pour une dame.'_
+
+"L'amour si chèrement m'a vendu son lien
+Qu'il me coûte déjà la moitié de mon bien,
+Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse,
+Où tant d'or se relève en bosse,
+Qu'il étonne tout le pays,
+Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Laïs,
+Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante,
+Dis plutôt qu'il est de ma rente."]
+
+PHI. Ah! Laïs! what erudition!
+
+BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million.
+
+TRI.
+  _And when this chariot meets your eyes,
+  Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise
+  That people all astonished stand,
+  And Laïs rides in triumph through the land,
+  Say no more it is amaranth,
+  Say rather it is o' my rent._
+
+ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected
+that?
+
+PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste.
+
+BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_!
+It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my
+rent_.
+
+PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I
+saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of
+your composition, we could admire in our turn.
+
+PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I
+shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of
+the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he
+wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I
+have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at
+the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will
+avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by
+confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime
+knowledge against us.
+
+ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to
+the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the
+beauties of lace, or of a new brocade.
+
+BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim
+our emancipation.
+
+TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I
+render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the
+splendour of their intellect.  PHI. And our sex does you justice in
+this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with
+proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they
+can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they
+wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to
+deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on
+all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to
+none.
+
+TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism.
+
+PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism.
+
+ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid.
+
+BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to
+understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter.
+
+TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism.
+
+ARM. I like his vortices.
+
+PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary
+here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than
+could be given except by very long notes.]
+
+ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves
+by some great discovery.
+
+TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has
+hidden few things from you.
+
+PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one
+discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon.
+
+BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have
+seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the
+day had boasted of having done this.]
+
+ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar,
+history, verse, ethics, and politics.
+
+PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly
+the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the
+Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder.
+
+ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and
+we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy,
+we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs
+and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are
+preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned
+meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to
+purge both prose and verse.
+
+PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise
+which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved
+by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all
+those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of
+scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous
+commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous
+ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted.
+
+TRI. These are indeed admirable projects.
+
+BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready.
+
+TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful.
+
+ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws,
+prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have
+wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with
+everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE.
+
+LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to
+speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone.
+(_They all rise._)
+
+TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him
+the honour of your acquaintance.
+
+PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us.   (TRISSOTIN
+_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BÉLISE). At least, let us do him
+all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is
+going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to
+you.
+
+HEN. But what about?
+
+PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Ménage who
+is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In
+presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing
+a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits.
+
+PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value.
+
+TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows
+Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France.
+
+PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek,
+sister!
+
+BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek!
+
+ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful!
+
+PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of
+Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BÉLISE _and_
+ARMANDE.)
+
+HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_)
+Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.)
+
+PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books.
+
+VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you
+to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some
+learned discourse.
+
+PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing.
+
+TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he
+could, if he chose, show you something.
+
+VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their
+productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms,
+or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for
+me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about
+begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers,
+often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been
+guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the
+opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any
+unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses
+for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion.
+
+TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others.
+
+VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours.  TRI. You have an easy
+style, and a fine choice of words.
+
+VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_.
+
+TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in
+sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil.
+
+VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves
+Horace far behind.
+
+TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets?
+
+VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write?
+
+TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus?
+
+VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals?
+
+TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad.
+
+VAD. And in _bouts-rimés_ I think you adorable.
+
+TRI. If France could appreciate your value--
+
+VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius--
+
+TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach.
+
+VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_
+TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to....
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon
+the Princess Urania's fever?
+
+VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday.
+
+TRI. Do you know the author of it?
+
+VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth,
+his sonnet is good for nothing.
+
+TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable.
+
+VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read
+it, you would think like me.
+
+TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few
+people are able to write such a sonnet.
+
+VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad!
+
+TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is
+that I am the author of it.
+
+VAD. You?
+
+TRI. Myself.
+
+VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened.
+
+TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you.
+
+VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader
+spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my
+ballad.
+
+TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer
+the fashion, and savours of ancient times.
+
+VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people.
+
+TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant.
+
+VAD. That does not make it worse.
+
+TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants.
+
+VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you.
+
+TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others.
+
+(_They all rise._)
+
+VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me.
+
+TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver!
+
+VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession!
+
+TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist!
+
+VAD. Go, you pedantic snob!
+
+PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about?
+
+TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks
+and Romans for all your shameful thefts.
+
+VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your
+verses.
+
+TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made.
+
+VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse.
+
+TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it.
+
+VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote:
+Boileau.]
+
+TRI. I, too, send you to him.
+
+VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him;
+he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors
+well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all
+his verses you are exposed to his attacks.
+
+TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the
+crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you
+the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately,
+as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and
+his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never
+thinks himself victorious.
+
+VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am.
+
+TRI. And mine will make you know your master.
+
+VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin.
+
+TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote:
+Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no
+doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.]
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE.
+
+TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in
+the sonnet he dares to attack.
+
+PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of
+something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been
+tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have
+thought of a means of remedying this defect.
+
+HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for
+learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much
+trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head,
+and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to
+have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to
+produce fine words.
+
+PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my
+intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face
+is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which
+only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and
+solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you
+the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of
+knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have
+at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius;
+(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I
+intend you to marry.
+
+HEN. Me, mother!
+
+PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little.
+
+BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for
+leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I
+yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you
+in society.
+
+TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell
+you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me....
+
+HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry.
+
+PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You
+understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her
+alone for the present.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth;
+she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband....
+
+HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself?
+
+ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed.
+
+HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister.
+
+ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I
+would accept your offer with delight.
+
+HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an
+excellent one.
+
+ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have
+to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in
+vain do you think by resistance to....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my
+daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your
+glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your
+heart consider him as the man I want you to marry.
+
+ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister.
+
+HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over
+us.
+
+ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience.
+
+CHRY. What is the meaning of this?
+
+ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to
+agree on this point, and this other husband....
+
+CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please
+with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done,
+and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once!
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders!
+
+CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me!
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us;
+take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How
+moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age,
+and I can still remember my youthful loving days.
+
+
+
+
+ACT IV.
+
+SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE.
+
+
+ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her
+obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She
+seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at
+defiance the will of her mother.
+
+PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason
+subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or
+body, form or matter.
+
+ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and
+that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite
+of yourself, behaves himself strangely.
+
+PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him
+well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always
+unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and
+yet he has never desired me to read anything to him.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and
+listening unseen_).
+
+ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's
+husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of
+speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think
+that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of
+philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can
+rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond
+all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not
+a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never
+could see that he had in his heart any respect for you.
+
+PHI. Poor idiot!
+
+ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in
+praising you.
+
+PHI. The churl!
+
+ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions,
+without his ever thinking them fine.
+
+PHI. The impertinent fellow!
+
+ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe
+what foolish things....
+
+CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at
+least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what
+am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to
+destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me
+odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great
+indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam,
+an impartial judge between us.
+
+ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find
+enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has
+such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose
+fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be
+compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless
+heart is a monster of immorality.
+
+CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your
+mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it
+imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the
+offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For
+two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care,
+duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my
+attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed
+to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another.
+Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after
+change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather
+turn me away?
+
+ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it
+of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the
+purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me
+keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense;
+and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in
+which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material
+passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you
+must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How
+far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The
+senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites
+the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame
+pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only
+sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is
+mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of
+loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their
+transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget.
+
+CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so,
+that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached
+to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this
+separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul
+go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that
+purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the
+soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But
+such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross
+and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given
+to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for
+lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble
+sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue;
+that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable
+and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without
+giving you cause to be offended at such a thought.
+
+ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say,
+your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a
+faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will,
+if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you
+wish.
+
+CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to
+return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I
+sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled
+when you disdained me.
+
+PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my
+consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it
+enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not
+expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny
+of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux
+esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to
+translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself
+beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed
+to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of
+the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives
+nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us.
+Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has
+made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid
+verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them.
+
+PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him
+with other eyes than you do.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We
+have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us,
+and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_.
+Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way
+it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so
+much glass.
+
+PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman
+would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and
+above all to hate intellect and knowledge.
+
+CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain
+myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils
+people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather
+be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain
+people.
+
+TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the
+contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything.
+
+CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and
+in deeds.
+
+TRI. The paradox is rather strong.
+
+CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very
+clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be
+wanting.
+
+TRI. You might cite some without proving your point.
+
+CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want.
+
+TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples.
+
+CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me.
+
+TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and
+not knowledge.
+
+CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is
+more of a fool than an ignorant one.
+
+TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a
+fool are synonymous.
+
+CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater
+connection between pedant and fool.
+
+TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly.
+
+CLI. And study adds to nature in the other.
+
+TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value.
+
+CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence.
+
+TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly
+take up arms in its defence.
+
+CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with
+learned people of a certain kind.
+
+TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them
+well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind.
+
+CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a
+question with certain people.
+
+PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir....
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough
+without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an
+adversary, and as I fight I retreat.
+
+ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers....
+
+CLI. Another ally! I quit the field.
+
+PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no
+one in particular.
+
+CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can
+bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many
+other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it.
+
+TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this
+contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The
+court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a
+certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he
+takes up its defence.
+
+CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great
+indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it;
+making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for
+its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success.
+Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which
+your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you,
+to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is
+not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has
+good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can
+be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without
+flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry.
+
+TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir.
+
+CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad?
+
+TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour
+to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no
+notice from the court.
+
+CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you
+forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me
+what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their
+writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible
+injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours
+on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France!
+and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These
+wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed
+and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the
+state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that
+at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured
+down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon
+them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think
+themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have
+said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and
+ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming
+themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the
+indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in
+books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for
+all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything,
+void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they
+decry everywhere true learning and knowledge.
+
+PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows
+the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which
+excites in your breast....
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN.
+
+JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and
+whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this
+letter.
+
+PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a
+piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a
+servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the
+household to be introduced.
+
+JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book.
+
+PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry
+your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your
+wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage
+before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While
+you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in
+all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus,
+where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has
+pilfered._"
+
+We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I
+have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an
+action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it
+does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your
+master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I
+set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I
+esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this
+gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN).
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may
+assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you
+to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister
+of my decision.
+
+ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman
+will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her
+heart to rebellion.
+
+PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring
+her to a sense of her duty.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE.
+
+ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite
+according to your views.
+
+CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety
+upon your mind.
+
+ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful.
+
+CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation.
+
+ARM. I hope it may be so.
+
+CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help.
+
+ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power.
+
+CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for
+your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in
+favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in
+the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin?
+
+ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is
+carrying it off over the head of his rival.
+
+CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night.
+
+CHRY. To-night?
+
+CLI. Yes, to-night.
+
+CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have
+you both married.
+
+CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract.
+
+CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up.
+
+CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to
+which she must look forward.
+
+CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for
+this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master
+but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will
+return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my
+son-in-law.
+
+HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition.
+
+ARI. I will do everything to serve your love.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE.
+
+CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my
+greatest hope is in your constancy.
+
+HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love.
+
+CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that.
+
+HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me.
+
+CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to
+fear.
+
+HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes,
+and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have
+resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else.
+
+CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of
+your love.
+
+
+
+
+ACT V.
+
+SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN.
+
+
+HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon
+that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that,
+seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you
+listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a
+considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has
+no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly
+grandeur should not show itself in your words only.
+
+TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your
+dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble
+air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows
+and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured.
+
+HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and
+to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one
+can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You
+know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that
+Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much
+less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice
+of a husband, and that with your many talents yon ought to please me.
+I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that
+reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness.
+
+TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give
+me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I
+have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved.
+
+HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by
+your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my
+confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which
+springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but
+is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases
+us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love,
+all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus
+guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the
+violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of
+honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he
+feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and
+will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to
+exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up
+your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so
+precious as yours.
+
+TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it
+can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be
+loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms....
+
+HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so
+many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses
+you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that....
+
+TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is
+only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the
+adorable Henriette.
+
+HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you....
+
+TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love,
+ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can
+put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty
+condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who
+wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining
+such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little
+to me how it comes to pass.
+
+HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by
+using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry
+a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain
+revenge that a husband should fear.
+
+TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A
+philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all
+vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from
+minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for
+Wives,' act iv. scene vi.]
+
+HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that
+philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with
+constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit
+subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in
+giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the
+truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another;
+and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the
+happiness of seeing you my husband.
+
+TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end.
+In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE.
+
+CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your
+duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach
+your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is
+Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house
+again.
+
+HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to
+change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved,
+and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do
+not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having
+her own way.
+
+CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby?
+
+HEN. Heaven forbid!
+
+CHRY. Am I a fool, pray?
+
+HEN. I do not say that.
+
+CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense?
+
+HEN. No, father.
+
+CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home?
+
+HEN. Of course.
+
+CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the
+nose?
+
+HEN. Oh dear, no, father.
+
+CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me
+as you do!
+
+HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally.
+
+CHRY. My will is law in this place.
+
+HEN. Certainly, father.
+
+CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command.
+
+HEN. Yes, you are right, father.
+
+CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family.
+
+HEN. Agreed.
+
+CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand.
+
+HEN. Yes, indeed, father.
+
+CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you.
+
+HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary.
+
+CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your
+father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey.
+
+HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to
+you is my earnest wish.
+
+CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will.
+
+CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her.
+
+CHRY. Back me up, all of you.
+
+MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY,
+CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style,
+and give us a contract couched in noble language?
+
+NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to
+try and change a single word.
+
+BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for
+learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to
+have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date
+in Ides and Kalends.
+
+NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would
+hiss me.
+
+PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit
+down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares
+to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to
+know?
+
+CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do.
+
+NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride?
+
+PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage.
+
+NOT. Good.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is
+Henriette.
+
+NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom?
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give
+her.
+
+CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry
+is this gentleman.
+
+NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one.
+
+PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down
+Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law.
+
+CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre.
+
+NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is
+to be the future husband.
+
+PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice.
+
+CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will.
+
+NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey.
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes.
+
+CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of
+the wealth which is in my family.
+
+PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it
+were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man.
+
+CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre.
+
+PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband
+she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing
+is settled.
+
+CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone.
+
+MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up
+the lead to the men in everything.
+
+CHRY. That is well said.
+
+MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the
+hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there.
+
+CHRY. Just so.
+
+MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his
+wife wears the breeches.
+
+CHRY. It is perfectly true.
+
+MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master
+of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the
+henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke
+too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on
+the ear, he made me pitch it lower.
+
+CHRY. You speak as you ought.
+
+MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter.
+
+CHRY. Certainly.
+
+MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in
+order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about
+something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares
+neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin.
+
+CHRY. Excellent.
+
+PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease.
+
+MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have
+said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my
+husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books
+agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to
+anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who
+doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in
+short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this
+scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly
+at times.]
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened
+patiently enough to your worthy interpreter?
+
+CHRY. She has only said the truth.
+
+PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed.
+(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be
+united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply;
+and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister.
+
+CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE
+and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent?
+
+HEN. How! father...!
+
+CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...!
+
+BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are
+establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star;
+the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance.
+
+
+
+
+SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE,
+TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE.
+
+ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad
+tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me
+bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_
+PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney.
+(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons.
+
+PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us?
+
+ARI. You can read it in this letter.
+
+PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it
+will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself.
+The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause
+that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have
+altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_
+
+CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost!
+
+PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no
+way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind
+wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost
+you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with
+all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for
+criminals.
+
+ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest
+against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the
+court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs."
+
+PHI. Let us see the other.
+
+CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts
+me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you
+had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon,
+and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O
+Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment!
+
+PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the
+truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he
+still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and
+please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth
+will be sufficient for us and for him.
+
+TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further.
+I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no
+intention of forcing the wills of others.
+
+PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of
+fortune.
+
+TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to
+relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for
+a heart that will not surrender itself.
+
+PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto
+refused to believe.
+
+TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how
+you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of
+the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of
+more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble
+servant. (_Exit_.)
+
+
+
+
+SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE,
+CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE.
+
+PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little
+like a philosopher he has acted.
+
+CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my
+destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess.
+
+PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward
+your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection....
+
+HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist
+your will.
+
+CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody
+for me....
+
+HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired
+you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw
+that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such
+reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity.
+
+CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery.
+
+HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the
+torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more
+than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of
+all the sorrows that follow such an engagement.
+
+ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason
+which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre?
+
+HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with
+all my heart.
+
+ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news
+I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to
+serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her
+philosopher would prove when put to the test.
+
+CHRY. Heaven be praised!
+
+PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly
+deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to
+see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded.
+
+CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her.
+
+ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love?
+
+PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your
+philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned.
+
+BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart.
+Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they
+repent ever after.
+
+CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up
+the contract in accordance with what I said.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin)
+
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