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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/8772-8.txt b/8772-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..04171c0 --- /dev/null +++ b/8772-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,3107 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin) + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Learned Women + +Author: Moliere (Poquelin) + +Posting Date: April 17, 2013 [EBook #8772] +Release Date: August, 2005 +First Posted: August 12, 2003 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + + + + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + + + + + + + + + +THE LEARNED WOMEN + +(LES FEMMES SAVANTES) + + +BY + +MOLIÈRE + + +TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE. + +_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_ + + +BY + +CHARLES HERON WALL + + + +The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see +vol. i. p. 153). + +Molière acted the part of Chrysale. + + + + +PERSONS REPRESENTED + +CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_ + +PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE + +ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_ + +ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE + +BÉLISE, _his sister_ + +CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE + +TRISSOTIN, _a wit_ + +VADIUS, _a learned man_ + +MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_ + +LÉPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE + +JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS + +A NOTARY. + + + +THE LEARNED WOMEN. + + + + +ACT I. + +SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + + +ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of +maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can +enter your head! + +HEN. Yes, sister. + +ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings +of disgust? + +HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to.... + +ARM. Ah! Fie! + +HEN. What? + +ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very +mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a +repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before +it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which +this word implies? + +HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I +only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and +I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one +shudder. + +ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you? + +HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves +me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the +delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you +see no attraction in such a bond? + +ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you +act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think +of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a +husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the +low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour +to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and +matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the +cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is +everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove +yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which +is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous +pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind. +Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself, +sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of +mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the +animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level +of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which +should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many +women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities. + +HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill +different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of +materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar +to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned +men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its +weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with +the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different +instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will +inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will +taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths, +we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble +longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the +productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more +material. + +ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side +we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model, +sister, to cough and spit like her. + +HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our +mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that +her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray, +leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by +wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the +world. + +ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of +taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend +to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre? + +HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I +have made? + +ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the +conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that +Clitandre has publicly sighed for me. + +HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not +share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony, +and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no +pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has +such pretensions? + +ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon +us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a +husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of +our admirers. + +HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have +only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it. + +ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected +lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me +can be dead in his heart? + +HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him. + +ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when +he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but +deceives himself. + +HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to +discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point +he will be sure to give us full information. + + + + +SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me. +Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which +of us has a claim upon your love. + +ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an +explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how +perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses. + +CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to +speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge +before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me +(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this +side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished +things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender +sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an +immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had +made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over +my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked +elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel. +(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds +will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with +compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you +had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing +which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never +to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this +gentle bondage. + +ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in +short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous +that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to +declare it to me. + +HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so +much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can +restrain the madness of anger? + +ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you +respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received +leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you +to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their +choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is +criminal in you to dispose of it yourself. + +HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my +duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced; +and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see +that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I +have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me +the power of loving you without a crime. + +CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind +permission from you. + +ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me +pain. + +HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will +always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons +you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far +from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use +your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will +by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech +you to do so; and in order to secure this end.... + +ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you +seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you. + +HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked +by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even +condescend to do so. + +ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating. + +HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation. + + + + +SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback. + +CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of +her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave, +I will go to your father, to.... + +HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father +easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he +himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness +which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who +governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she +has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more +pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall +in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem. + +CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in +your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female +doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of +everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of +wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that +she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In +short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without +publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of +pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly +respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make +myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she +bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and +wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such +a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings +are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the +markets with wastepaper. + +HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is +unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he +possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to +yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is +engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have +nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house. + +CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot +consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising +his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice, +and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he +writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the +persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good +opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at +all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings +of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all +the honours of the greatest general. + +HEN. You have good eyes to see all that. + +CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with +which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I +pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a +man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of +the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be +Trissotin--and I won my wager. + +HEN. What a tale! + +CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your +aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my +heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother. + + + + +SCENE IV.--BÉLISE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to +reveal to you his sincere devotion.... + +BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me; +although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no +interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language +desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my +charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your +secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but +if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my +sight. + +CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is, +Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to +favour the love I have for her. + +BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle +evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over, +I have never met with anything more ingenious. + +CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my +heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the +ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains; +and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much +towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will +condescend to second my addresses. + +BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I +understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and +not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against +matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your +love returned. + +CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will +you persist in believing what is not? + +BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what +your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am +content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and +that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to +suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by +honour, offer only pure vows on my altars. + +CLI. But.... + +BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more +than I wished to say. + +CLI. But your error.... + +BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear. + +CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Molière ends +this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to +find a rhyme to _davantage._] + +BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more. + + + + +SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_) + +Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so +preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of +more sense. + + + +ACT II. + +SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to +him_). + + +Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press, +insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say +when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he +desires! Never.... + + + + +SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +ARI. Good day to you, brother. + +CHRY. And to you also, brother. + +ARI. Do you know what brings me here? + +CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to +tell me. + +ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now? + +CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house. + +ARI. And what do you think of him? + +CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and +uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit. + +ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see +the esteem you have for him. + +CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome. + +ARI. Ah! + +CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman. + +ARI. So it is said. + +CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word, +we were, both of us, very gay young fellows. + +ARI. I believe it. + +CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke +of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you. + +ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here. + + + + +SCENE III.--BÉLISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE, +ARISTE. + +ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has +fallen in love with Henriette. + +CHRY. What! with my daughter? + +ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover +so smitten! + +BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the +story, and the thing is not as you imagine. + +ARI. How so, sister? + +BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love. + +ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking. + +BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth. + +ARI. He told me so himself. + +BEL. Doubtless. + +ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her +father. + +BEL. Yes, I know. + +ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time +of an alliance so desired by him. + +BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been +employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an +ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the +mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both. + +ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves. + +BEL. You wish to know? + +ARI. Yes; who is it? BEL. Me! + +ARI. You! + +BEL. Myself. + +ARI. Come, I say! sister! + +BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so +wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to +have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante, +Damis, Cléonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms. + +ARI. Do those men love you? + +BEL. Yes; with all their might. + +ARI. They have told you so? + +BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present +time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their +love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering +their hearts and lives to me. + +ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here. + +BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission. + +ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere. + +BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion. + +ARI. Cléonte and Lycidas are both married. + +BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love. + +ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions. + +CHRY. (to BÉLISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies. + +BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle +fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at +those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted +to idle fancies. + + + + +SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy. + +ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that +brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage. +Tell me what answer we can make to his love. + +CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider +his alliance a great honour. + +ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that.... + +CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and +that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one +mind in two bodies. + +ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable +to.... + +CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law. + +ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have +her agree to it also. Let us go.... + +CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife, +and take the business upon myself. + +ARI. But.... + +CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare +her this moment. + +ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and +will return to know.... + +CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to +my wife about it. + + + + +SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a +dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other +folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no +inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.] + +CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine? + +MAR. What is the matter? + +CHRY. Yes. + +MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir. + +CHRY. Sent away? + +MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out. + +CHRY. I don't understand; why has she? + +MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go. + +CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife +is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no.... + + + + +SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick, +leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again. + +CHRY. Gently. + +PHI. No; I will have it so. + +CHRY. What? + +PHI. I insist upon her going. + +CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way +to...? + +PHI. What! you take her part? + +CHRY. Certainly not. + +PHI. You side with her against me? + +CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of. + +PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause? + +CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with servants.... + +PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you. + +CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary? + +PHI. I will have no opposition to my will. + +CHRY. Agreed. + +PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against +her, and share my anger. + +CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right +in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be +forgiven. + +MAR. What is it I have done, then? + +CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know. + +PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing. + +CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some +china? + +PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you +fancy that I should get angry for so little? + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then? + +PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable? + +CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish +to be stolen from us? + +PHI. That would be of little moment. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE) +What! has she shown herself dishonest? + +PHI. It is worse than that. + +CHRY. Worse than that? + +PHI. Worse. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) What! has she...? + +PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons, +insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned +in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born +about 1585; died 1650.] + +CHRY. Is that...? + +PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the +foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and +makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws. + +CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime. + +PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable? + +CHRY. Yes, yes. + +PHI. I should like to see you excuse her. + +CHRY. Heaven forbid! + +BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet +she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language. + +MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't +understand your jargon, not I. + +PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on +reason and polite custom a jargon! + +MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your +fine speeches don't do me no good. + +PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no +good!_ + +BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we +daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting +_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as +you have been told, a negative too many. + +MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as +they speaks in our place. + +PHI. Ah! who can bear it? + +BEL. What a horrible solecism! + +PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear. + +BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding; +_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular. +Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in +Molière's time was pronounced as _grand'mère_ is now. _Gammer_ +seems the nearest approach to this in English.] + +MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer? + +PHI. O heavens! + +BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told +you a hundred times where the word comes from. + +MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise, +[Footnote: In Molière's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious +little. + +BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the +verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive. + +MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people. + +PHI. What martyrdom! + +BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree +with each other. + +MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out? + +PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a +discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away? + +CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go, +don't provoke her, Martine. + +PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in +quite an obliging tone. + +CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place. +(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl. + + + + +SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BÉLISE. + +CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of +sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she +has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle. + +PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to +torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and +reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of +garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the +gutters of all the market-places? + +BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls +Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are +either pleonasm or cacophony. + +CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of +Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather +that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the +verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that +she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on +good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to +make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words, +might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote: +Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.] + +PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one +who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead +of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the +body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and +ought we not to leave it far behind? + +CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it; +_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me. + +BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you +believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over +the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to +feed it with the juices of science. + +CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of +but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude +for.... + +PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays +strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the +purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.] + +BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion. + +CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I +will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad, +and I am greatly troubled at.... + +PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this? + +CHRY. (_to_ BÉLISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least +solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange +ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except +a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you +should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors +of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is +enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are +offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the +moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we +see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for +many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the +minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well, +to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy, +ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers +were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew +enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a +doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived +honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation, +and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she +worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from +behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too +deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest +secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be +known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus, +Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain +knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the +soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in +order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but +the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole +house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while +reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In +short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I +am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this +villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge +clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all +this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am +speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and +particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with +his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying +to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I +believe that he is rather cracked. + +PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language. + +BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A +reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more +vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I +hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon +the spot. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE. + +PHI. Have you any other shaft ready? + +CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak +of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage; +in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under +good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of +a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give +Henriette a proper husband, who.... + +PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you +of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are +blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the +man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit +better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have +duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a +word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the +subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you +have spoken to her. + + + + +SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE. + +ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a +talk together. + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given +her consent? Is the affair settled? + +CHRY. Not quite as yet. + +ARI. Does she refuse? + +CHRY. No. + +ARI. Then she hesitates? + +CHRY. Not in the least. + +ARI. What then? + +CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law. + +ARI. Another man for a son-in-law? + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. What is his name? + +CHRY. Mr. Trissotin. + +ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin.... + +CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin. + +ARI. And you have accepted him? + +CHRY. I? Heaven forbid! + +ARI. What did you say to it? + +CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself. + +ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end +we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her? + +CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was +better for me to say nothing. + +ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not +ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let +his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose +anything she has resolved upon? + +CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a +dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a +terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of +philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and +her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over +the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has +taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a +week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know +where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of +her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love. + +ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has +absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her +authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes +the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer +yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a +man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage +enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your +daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is +possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen +Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom +your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great +philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody +knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a +shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice. + +CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a +little more courage, brother. + +ARI. That's right. + +CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman. + +ARI. Good. + +CHRY. She has abused my gentleness. + +ARI. It is true. + +CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long. + +ARI. Certainly. + +CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter, +and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my +mind. + +ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be. + +CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to +me directly, brother. + +ARI. I will go at once. + +CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at +defiance. + + + + +ACT III. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE. + + +PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses; +they should be weighed word by word. + +ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them. + +BEL. And I am dying for them. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to +me. + +ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure. + +BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears. + +PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires. + +ARM. Lose no time. + +BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure. + +PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam, +but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your +court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since. + +PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its +father. + +TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother. + +BEL. What wit he has! + + + + +SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE. + +PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you +run away? + +HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse. + +PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing +wonders. + +HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and +witty things are not in my line. + +PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret +which you must learn. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you, +and your only care is to charm everybody. + +HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish.... + +BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you. + +PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to +sit down. (LÉPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you +fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium? + +BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall, +and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point +which we call the centre of gravity? + +LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground. + +PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown! + +TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass. + +ARM. Ah! wit is everything! + +BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._) + +PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast. + +TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of +eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to +join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet +which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain +delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think +you will find the taste of it tolerably good. + +ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it. + +PHI. Let us quickly give audience. + +BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to +read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry +to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned. + +PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read. + +TRI. SONN.... + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece. + +ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg. + +TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1] + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes--_ + +[1] +[The sonnet is not of Molière's invention, but is to be found in +_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris, +1663. It is called, _Sonnet à Mademoiselle de Longueville, à présent +Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fièvre quarte_. As, of necessity, the +translation given above is not very literal, I append the original. + + "Votre prudence est endormie, + De traiter magnifiquement, + Et de loger superbement, + Votre plus cruelle ennemie; + + Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die, + De votre riche appartement, + Où cette ingrate insolemment + Attaque votre belle vie! + + Quoi! sans respecter votre rang, + Elle se prend à votre sang, + Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage! + + Si vous la conduisez aux bains, + Sans la marchander davantage, + Noyez-la de vos propres mains." + +The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in +Molière's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently +true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you, +nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.] + +BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning! + +ARM. What a charming turn it has! + +PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses. + +ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is +plunged_. + +BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of +charms for me. + +PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs +joined together sound admirably. + +BEL. Let us hear the rest. + +TRI. + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes_ + +ARM. _Prudence asleep_! + +BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_! + +PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_! + +TRI. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes! + From your apartment richly lined, + Where that ingrate's outrageous mind + At your fair life her javelin throws_. + +BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you. + +ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg. + +PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something +which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint. + +ARM. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes + From your apartment richly lined_. +How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the +metaphor is introduced! + +PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what +admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the +passage is invaluable. + +ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_. + +BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy +expression. + +ARM. I wish I had written it. + +BEL. It is worth a whole poem! + +PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it? + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh + +PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another +should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips; +_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will +she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal +more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I +discover in it a hundred meanings. + +BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will +she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you +realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were +writing something so witty? + +TRI. Ah! ah! + +ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful, +unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her. + +PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to +the triplets, I pray. + +ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg. + +TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_ + +TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_ + +TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever! + +TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._ + +PHI. _Fair life!_ + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _What! without heed for your high line, + She saps your blood with care malign..._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _Redoubling outrage night and day! + If to the bath you take her down, + Without a moment's haggling, pray, + With your own hands the miscreant drown._ + +PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering. + +BEL. I faint. + +ARM. I die from pleasure. + +PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one. + +ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_ + +BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_ + +PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own +hands, there, drown her there in the bath. + +ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty. + +BEL. One promenades through them with rapture. + +PHI. One treads on fine things only. + +ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses. + +TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you.... + +PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more +beautiful. + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has +been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part! + +HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit +does not depend on our will. + +TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you. + +HEN. No. I do not listen. + +PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram. + +TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY +FRIENDS. [2] + +PHI. His titles have always something rare in them. + +ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit. + +TRI. + _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands, + E'en now it costs me more than half my lands, + And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Laïs rides in triumph through the land..._ + +[2] +[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un +carosse de couleur amarante, acheté pour une dame.'_ + +"L'amour si chèrement m'a vendu son lien +Qu'il me coûte déjà la moitié de mon bien, +Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse, +Où tant d'or se relève en bosse, +Qu'il étonne tout le pays, +Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Laïs, +Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante, +Dis plutôt qu'il est de ma rente."] + +PHI. Ah! Laïs! what erudition! + +BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million. + +TRI. + _And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Laïs rides in triumph through the land, + Say no more it is amaranth, + Say rather it is o' my rent._ + +ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected +that? + +PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste. + +BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_! +It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my +rent_. + +PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I +saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of +your composition, we could admire in our turn. + +PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I +shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of +the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he +wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I +have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at +the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will +avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by +confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime +knowledge against us. + +ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to +the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the +beauties of lace, or of a new brocade. + +BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim +our emancipation. + +TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I +render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the +splendour of their intellect. PHI. And our sex does you justice in +this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with +proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they +can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they +wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to +deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on +all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to +none. + +TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism. + +PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism. + +ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid. + +BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to +understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter. + +TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism. + +ARM. I like his vortices. + +PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary +here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than +could be given except by very long notes.] + +ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves +by some great discovery. + +TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has +hidden few things from you. + +PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one +discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon. + +BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have +seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the +day had boasted of having done this.] + +ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar, +history, verse, ethics, and politics. + +PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly +the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the +Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder. + +ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and +we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy, +we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs +and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are +preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned +meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to +purge both prose and verse. + +PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise +which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved +by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all +those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of +scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous +commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous +ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted. + +TRI. These are indeed admirable projects. + +BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready. + +TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful. + +ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws, +prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have +wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with +everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves. + + + + +SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE. + +LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to +speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone. +(_They all rise._) + +TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him +the honour of your acquaintance. + +PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us. (TRISSOTIN +_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.) + + + + +SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BÉLISE). At least, let us do him +all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is +going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to +you. + +HEN. But what about? + +PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject. + + + + +SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Ménage who +is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In +presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing +a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits. + +PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value. + +TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows +Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France. + +PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek, +sister! + +BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek! + +ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful! + +PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of +Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BÉLISE _and_ +ARMANDE.) + +HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_) +Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.) + +PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books. + +VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you +to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some +learned discourse. + +PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing. + +TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he +could, if he chose, show you something. + +VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their +productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms, +or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for +me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about +begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers, +often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been +guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the +opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any +unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses +for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion. + +TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others. + +VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours. + +TRI. You have an easy style, and a fine choice of words. + +VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_. + +TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in +sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil. + +VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves +Horace far behind. + +TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets? + +VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write? + +TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus? + +VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals? + +TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad. + +VAD. And in _bouts-rimés_ I think you adorable. + +TRI. If France could appreciate your value-- + +VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius-- + +TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach. + +VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_ +TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to.... + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon +the Princess Urania's fever? + +VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday. + +TRI. Do you know the author of it? + +VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth, +his sonnet is good for nothing. + +TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable. + +VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read +it, you would think like me. + +TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few +people are able to write such a sonnet. + +VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad! + +TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is +that I am the author of it. + +VAD. You? + +TRI. Myself. + +VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened. + +TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you. + +VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader +spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my +ballad. + +TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer +the fashion, and savours of ancient times. + +VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people. + +TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant. + +VAD. That does not make it worse. + +TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants. + +VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you. + +TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others. + +(_They all rise._) + +VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me. + +TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver! + +VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession! + +TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist! + +VAD. Go, you pedantic snob! + +PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about? + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks +and Romans for all your shameful thefts. + +VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your +verses. + +TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made. + +VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse. + +TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it. + +VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote: +Boileau.] + +TRI. I, too, send you to him. + +VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him; +he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors +well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all +his verses you are exposed to his attacks. + +TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the +crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you +the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately, +as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and +his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never +thinks himself victorious. + +VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am. + +TRI. And mine will make you know your master. + +VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin. + +TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote: +Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no +doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.] + + + + +SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in +the sonnet he dares to attack. + +PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of +something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been +tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have +thought of a means of remedying this defect. + +HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for +learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much +trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head, +and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to +have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to +produce fine words. + +PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my +intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face +is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which +only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and +solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you +the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of +knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have +at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius; +(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I +intend you to marry. + +HEN. Me, mother! + +PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little. + +BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for +leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I +yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you +in society. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell +you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me.... + +HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry. + +PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You +understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her +alone for the present. + + + + +SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth; +she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband.... + +HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself? + +ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed. + +HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister. + +ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I +would accept your offer with delight. + +HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an +excellent one. + +ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have +to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in +vain do you think by resistance to.... + + + + +SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my +daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your +glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your +heart consider him as the man I want you to marry. + +ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister. + +HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over +us. + +ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience. + +CHRY. What is the meaning of this? + +ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to +agree on this point, and this other husband.... + +CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please +with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done, +and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once! + + + + +SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders! + +CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me! + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us; +take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How +moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age, +and I can still remember my youthful loving days. + + + + +ACT IV. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE. + + +ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her +obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She +seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at +defiance the will of her mother. + +PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason +subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or +body, form or matter. + +ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and +that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite +of yourself, behaves himself strangely. + +PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him +well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always +unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and +yet he has never desired me to read anything to him. + + + + +SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and +listening unseen_). + +ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's +husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of +speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think +that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of +philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can +rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond +all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not +a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never +could see that he had in his heart any respect for you. + +PHI. Poor idiot! + +ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in +praising you. + +PHI. The churl! + +ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions, +without his ever thinking them fine. + +PHI. The impertinent fellow! + +ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe +what foolish things.... + +CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at +least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what +am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to +destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me +odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great +indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam, +an impartial judge between us. + +ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find +enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has +such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose +fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be +compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless +heart is a monster of immorality. + +CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your +mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it +imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the +offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For +two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care, +duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my +attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed +to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another. +Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after +change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather +turn me away? + +ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it +of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the +purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me +keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense; +and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in +which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material +passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you +must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How +far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The +senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites +the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame +pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only +sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is +mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of +loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their +transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget. + +CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so, +that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached +to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this +separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul +go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that +purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the +soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But +such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross +and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given +to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for +lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble +sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue; +that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable +and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without +giving you cause to be offended at such a thought. + +ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say, +your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a +faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will, +if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you +wish. + +CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to +return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I +sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled +when you disdained me. + +PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my +consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it +enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not +expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny +of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux +esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to +translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself +beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed +to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of +the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives +nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us. +Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has +made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid +verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them. + +PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him +with other eyes than you do. + + + + +SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We +have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us, +and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_. +Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way +it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so +much glass. + +PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman +would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and +above all to hate intellect and knowledge. + +CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain +myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils +people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather +be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain +people. + +TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the +contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything. + +CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and +in deeds. + +TRI. The paradox is rather strong. + +CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very +clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be +wanting. + +TRI. You might cite some without proving your point. + +CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want. + +TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples. + +CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me. + +TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and +not knowledge. + +CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is +more of a fool than an ignorant one. + +TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a +fool are synonymous. + +CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater +connection between pedant and fool. + +TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly. + +CLI. And study adds to nature in the other. + +TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value. + +CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence. + +TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly +take up arms in its defence. + +CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with +learned people of a certain kind. + +TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them +well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind. + +CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a +question with certain people. + +PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir.... + +CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough +without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an +adversary, and as I fight I retreat. + +ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers.... + +CLI. Another ally! I quit the field. + +PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no +one in particular. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can +bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many +other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it. + +TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this +contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The +court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a +certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he +takes up its defence. + +CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great +indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it; +making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for +its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success. +Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which +your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you, +to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is +not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has +good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can +be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without +flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry. + +TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir. + +CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad? + +TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour +to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no +notice from the court. + +CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you +forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me +what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their +writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible +injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours +on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France! +and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These +wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed +and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the +state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that +at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured +down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon +them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think +themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have +said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and +ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming +themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the +indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in +books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for +all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything, +void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they +decry everywhere true learning and knowledge. + +PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows +the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which +excites in your breast.... + + + + +SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN. + +JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and +whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this +letter. + +PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a +piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a +servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the +household to be introduced. + +JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book. + +PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry +your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your +wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage +before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While +you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in +all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus, +where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has +pilfered._" + +We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I +have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an +action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it +does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your +master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I +set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I +esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this +gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). + + + + +SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may +assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you +to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister +of my decision. + +ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman +will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her +heart to rebellion. + +PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring +her to a sense of her duty. + + + + +SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite +according to your views. + +CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety +upon your mind. + +ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful. + +CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation. + +ARM. I hope it may be so. + +CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help. + +ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power. + +CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful. + + + + +SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for +your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in +favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law. + +CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in +the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin? + +ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is +carrying it off over the head of his rival. + +CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night. + +CHRY. To-night? + +CLI. Yes, to-night. + +CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have +you both married. + +CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract. + +CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up. + +CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to +which she must look forward. + +CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for +this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master +but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will +return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my +son-in-law. + +HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition. + +ARI. I will do everything to serve your love. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my +greatest hope is in your constancy. + +HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love. + +CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that. + +HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me. + +CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to +fear. + +HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes, +and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have +resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else. + +CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of +your love. + + + + +ACT V. + +SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN. + + +HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon +that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that, +seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you +listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a +considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has +no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly +grandeur should not show itself in your words only. + +TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your +dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble +air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows +and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured. + +HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and +to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one +can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You +know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that +Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much +less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice +of a husband, and that with your many talents you ought to please me. +I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that +reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness. + +TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give +me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I +have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved. + +HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by +your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my +confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which +springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but +is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases +us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love, +all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus +guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the +violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of +honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he +feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and +will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to +exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up +your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so +precious as yours. + +TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it +can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be +loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms.... + +HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so +many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses +you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that.... + +TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is +only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the +adorable Henriette. + +HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you.... + +TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love, +ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can +put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty +condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who +wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining +such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little +to me how it comes to pass. + +HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by +using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry +a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain +revenge that a husband should fear. + +TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A +philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all +vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from +minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for +Wives,' act iv. scene vi.] + +HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that +philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with +constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit +subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in +giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the +truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another; +and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the +happiness of seeing you my husband. + +TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end. +In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting. + + + + +SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your +duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach +your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is +Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house +again. + +HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to +change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved, +and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do +not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having +her own way. + +CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby? + +HEN. Heaven forbid! + +CHRY. Am I a fool, pray? + +HEN. I do not say that. + +CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense? + +HEN. No, father. + +CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home? + +HEN. Of course. + +CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the +nose? + +HEN. Oh dear, no, father. + +CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me +as you do! + +HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally. + +CHRY. My will is law in this place. + +HEN. Certainly, father. + +CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command. + +HEN. Yes, you are right, father. + +CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family. + +HEN. Agreed. + +CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand. + +HEN. Yes, indeed, father. + +CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you. + +HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary. + +CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your +father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey. + +HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to +you is my earnest wish. + +CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will. + +CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her. + +CHRY. Back me up, all of you. + +MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be. + + + + +SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, +CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style, +and give us a contract couched in noble language? + +NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to +try and change a single word. + +BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for +learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to +have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date +in Ides and Kalends. + +NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would +hiss me. + +PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit +down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares +to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to +know? + +CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do. + +NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride? + +PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage. + +NOT. Good. + +CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is +Henriette. + +NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom? + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give +her. + +CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry +is this gentleman. + +NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down +Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law. + +CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre. + +NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is +to be the future husband. + +PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice. + +CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will. + +NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey. + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes. + +CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of +the wealth which is in my family. + +PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it +were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man. + +CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre. + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband +she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing +is settled. + +CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone. + +MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up +the lead to the men in everything. + +CHRY. That is well said. + +MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the +hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there. + +CHRY. Just so. + +MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his +wife wears the breeches. + +CHRY. It is perfectly true. + +MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master +of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the +henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke +too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on +the ear, he made me pitch it lower. + +CHRY. You speak as you ought. + +MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter. + +CHRY. Certainly. + +MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in +order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about +something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares +neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin. + +CHRY. Excellent. + +PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease. + +MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have +said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my +husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books +agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to +anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who +doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in +short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this +scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly +at times.] + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened +patiently enough to your worthy interpreter? + +CHRY. She has only said the truth. + +PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed. +(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be +united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply; +and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister. + +CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE +and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent? + +HEN. How! father...! + +CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...! + +BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are +establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star; +the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance. + + + + +SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE, +TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE. + +ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad +tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me +bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney. +(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons. + +PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us? + +ARI. You can read it in this letter. + +PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it +will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself. +The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause +that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have +altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_ + +CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost! + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no +way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind +wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost +you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with +all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for +criminals. + +ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest +against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the +court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs." + +PHI. Let us see the other. + +CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts +me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you +had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon, +and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O +Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment! + +PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the +truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he +still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and +please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth +will be sufficient for us and for him. + +TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further. +I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no +intention of forcing the wills of others. + +PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of +fortune. + +TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to +relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for +a heart that will not surrender itself. + +PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto +refused to believe. + +TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how +you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of +the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of +more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble +servant. (_Exit_.) + + + + +SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, +CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE. + +PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little +like a philosopher he has acted. + +CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my +destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess. + +PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward +your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection.... + +HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist +your will. + +CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody +for me.... + +HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired +you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw +that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such +reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity. + +CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery. + +HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the +torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more +than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of +all the sorrows that follow such an engagement. + +ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason +which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre? + +HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with +all my heart. + +ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news +I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to +serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her +philosopher would prove when put to the test. + +CHRY. Heaven be praised! + +PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly +deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to +see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded. + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her. + +ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love? + +PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your +philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned. + +BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart. +Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they +repent ever after. + +CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up +the contract in accordance with what I said. + + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin) + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + +***** This file should be named 8772-8.txt or 8772-8.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/8/7/7/8772/ + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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Hart was the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm +concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared +with anyone. For forty years, he produced and distributed Project +Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. + +Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. +unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily +keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. + +Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: + + www.gutenberg.org + +This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, +including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to +subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. diff --git a/8772-8.zip b/8772-8.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..2a7ef6d --- /dev/null +++ b/8772-8.zip diff --git a/8772.txt b/8772.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..e515652 --- /dev/null +++ b/8772.txt @@ -0,0 +1,3107 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin) + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Learned Women + +Author: Moliere (Poquelin) + +Posting Date: April 17, 2013 [EBook #8772] +Release Date: August, 2005 +First Posted: August 12, 2003 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + + + + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + + + + + + + + + +THE LEARNED WOMEN + +(LES FEMMES SAVANTES) + + +BY + +MOLIERE + + +TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE. + +_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_ + + +BY + +CHARLES HERON WALL + + + +The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see +vol. i. p. 153). + +Moliere acted the part of Chrysale. + + + + +PERSONS REPRESENTED + +CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_ + +PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE + +ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_ + +ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE + +BELISE, _his sister_ + +CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE + +TRISSOTIN, _a wit_ + +VADIUS, _a learned man_ + +MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_ + +LEPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE + +JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS + +A NOTARY. + + + +THE LEARNED WOMEN. + + + + +ACT I. + +SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + + +ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of +maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can +enter your head! + +HEN. Yes, sister. + +ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings +of disgust? + +HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to.... + +ARM. Ah! Fie! + +HEN. What? + +ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very +mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a +repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before +it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which +this word implies? + +HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I +only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and +I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one +shudder. + +ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you? + +HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves +me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the +delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you +see no attraction in such a bond? + +ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you +act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think +of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a +husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the +low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour +to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and +matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the +cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is +everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove +yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which +is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous +pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind. +Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself, +sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of +mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the +animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level +of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which +should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many +women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities. + +HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill +different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of +materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar +to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned +men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its +weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with +the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different +instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will +inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will +taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths, +we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble +longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the +productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more +material. + +ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side +we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model, +sister, to cough and spit like her. + +HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our +mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that +her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray, +leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by +wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the +world. + +ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of +taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend +to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre? + +HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I +have made? + +ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the +conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that +Clitandre has publicly sighed for me. + +HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not +share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony, +and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no +pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has +such pretensions? + +ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon +us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a +husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of +our admirers. + +HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have +only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it. + +ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected +lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me +can be dead in his heart? + +HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him. + +ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when +he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but +deceives himself. + +HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to +discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point +he will be sure to give us full information. + + + + +SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me. +Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which +of us has a claim upon your love. + +ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an +explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how +perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses. + +CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to +speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge +before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me +(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this +side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished +things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender +sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an +immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had +made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over +my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked +elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel. +(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds +will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with +compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you +had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing +which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never +to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this +gentle bondage. + +ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in +short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous +that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to +declare it to me. + +HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so +much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can +restrain the madness of anger? + +ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you +respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received +leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you +to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their +choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is +criminal in you to dispose of it yourself. + +HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my +duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced; +and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see +that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I +have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me +the power of loving you without a crime. + +CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind +permission from you. + +ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me +pain. + +HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will +always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons +you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far +from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use +your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will +by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech +you to do so; and in order to secure this end.... + +ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you +seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you. + +HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked +by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even +condescend to do so. + +ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating. + +HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation. + + + + +SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback. + +CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of +her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave, +I will go to your father, to.... + +HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father +easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he +himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness +which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who +governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she +has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more +pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall +in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem. + +CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in +your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female +doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of +everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of +wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that +she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In +short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without +publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of +pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly +respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make +myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she +bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and +wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such +a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings +are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the +markets with wastepaper. + +HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is +unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he +possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to +yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is +engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have +nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house. + +CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot +consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising +his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice, +and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he +writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the +persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good +opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at +all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings +of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all +the honours of the greatest general. + +HEN. You have good eyes to see all that. + +CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with +which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I +pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a +man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of +the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be +Trissotin--and I won my wager. + +HEN. What a tale! + +CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your +aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my +heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother. + + + + +SCENE IV.--BELISE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to +reveal to you his sincere devotion.... + +BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me; +although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no +interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language +desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my +charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your +secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but +if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my +sight. + +CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is, +Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to +favour the love I have for her. + +BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle +evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over, +I have never met with anything more ingenious. + +CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my +heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the +ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains; +and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much +towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will +condescend to second my addresses. + +BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I +understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and +not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against +matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your +love returned. + +CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will +you persist in believing what is not? + +BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what +your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am +content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and +that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to +suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by +honour, offer only pure vows on my altars. + +CLI. But.... + +BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more +than I wished to say. + +CLI. But your error.... + +BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear. + +CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Moliere ends +this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to +find a rhyme to _davantage._] + +BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more. + + + + +SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_) + +Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so +preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of +more sense. + + + +ACT II. + +SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to +him_). + + +Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press, +insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say +when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he +desires! Never.... + + + + +SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +ARI. Good day to you, brother. + +CHRY. And to you also, brother. + +ARI. Do you know what brings me here? + +CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to +tell me. + +ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now? + +CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house. + +ARI. And what do you think of him? + +CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and +uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit. + +ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see +the esteem you have for him. + +CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome. + +ARI. Ah! + +CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman. + +ARI. So it is said. + +CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word, +we were, both of us, very gay young fellows. + +ARI. I believe it. + +CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke +of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you. + +ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here. + + + + +SCENE III.--BELISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE, +ARISTE. + +ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has +fallen in love with Henriette. + +CHRY. What! with my daughter? + +ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover +so smitten! + +BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the +story, and the thing is not as you imagine. + +ARI. How so, sister? + +BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love. + +ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking. + +BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth. + +ARI. He told me so himself. + +BEL. Doubtless. + +ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her +father. + +BEL. Yes, I know. + +ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time +of an alliance so desired by him. + +BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been +employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an +ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the +mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both. + +ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves. + +BEL. You wish to know? + +ARI. Yes; who is it? BEL. Me! + +ARI. You! + +BEL. Myself. + +ARI. Come, I say! sister! + +BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so +wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to +have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante, +Damis, Cleonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms. + +ARI. Do those men love you? + +BEL. Yes; with all their might. + +ARI. They have told you so? + +BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present +time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their +love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering +their hearts and lives to me. + +ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here. + +BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission. + +ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere. + +BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion. + +ARI. Cleonte and Lycidas are both married. + +BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love. + +ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions. + +CHRY. (to BELISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies. + +BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle +fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at +those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted +to idle fancies. + + + + +SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy. + +ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that +brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage. +Tell me what answer we can make to his love. + +CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider +his alliance a great honour. + +ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that.... + +CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and +that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one +mind in two bodies. + +ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable +to.... + +CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law. + +ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have +her agree to it also. Let us go.... + +CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife, +and take the business upon myself. + +ARI. But.... + +CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare +her this moment. + +ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and +will return to know.... + +CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to +my wife about it. + + + + +SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a +dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other +folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no +inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.] + +CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine? + +MAR. What is the matter? + +CHRY. Yes. + +MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir. + +CHRY. Sent away? + +MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out. + +CHRY. I don't understand; why has she? + +MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go. + +CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife +is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no.... + + + + +SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick, +leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again. + +CHRY. Gently. + +PHI. No; I will have it so. + +CHRY. What? + +PHI. I insist upon her going. + +CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way +to...? + +PHI. What! you take her part? + +CHRY. Certainly not. + +PHI. You side with her against me? + +CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of. + +PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause? + +CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with servants.... + +PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you. + +CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary? + +PHI. I will have no opposition to my will. + +CHRY. Agreed. + +PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against +her, and share my anger. + +CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right +in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be +forgiven. + +MAR. What is it I have done, then? + +CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know. + +PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing. + +CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some +china? + +PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you +fancy that I should get angry for so little? + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then? + +PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable? + +CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish +to be stolen from us? + +PHI. That would be of little moment. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE) +What! has she shown herself dishonest? + +PHI. It is worse than that. + +CHRY. Worse than that? + +PHI. Worse. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) What! has she...? + +PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons, +insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned +in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born +about 1585; died 1650.] + +CHRY. Is that...? + +PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the +foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and +makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws. + +CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime. + +PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable? + +CHRY. Yes, yes. + +PHI. I should like to see you excuse her. + +CHRY. Heaven forbid! + +BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet +she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language. + +MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't +understand your jargon, not I. + +PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on +reason and polite custom a jargon! + +MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your +fine speeches don't do me no good. + +PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no +good!_ + +BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we +daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting +_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as +you have been told, a negative too many. + +MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as +they speaks in our place. + +PHI. Ah! who can bear it? + +BEL. What a horrible solecism! + +PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear. + +BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding; +_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular. +Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in +Moliere's time was pronounced as _grand'mere_ is now. _Gammer_ +seems the nearest approach to this in English.] + +MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer? + +PHI. O heavens! + +BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told +you a hundred times where the word comes from. + +MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise, +[Footnote: In Moliere's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious +little. + +BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the +verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive. + +MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people. + +PHI. What martyrdom! + +BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree +with each other. + +MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out? + +PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a +discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away? + +CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go, +don't provoke her, Martine. + +PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in +quite an obliging tone. + +CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place. +(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl. + + + + +SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BELISE. + +CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of +sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she +has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle. + +PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to +torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and +reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of +garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the +gutters of all the market-places? + +BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls +Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are +either pleonasm or cacophony. + +CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of +Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather +that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the +verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that +she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on +good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to +make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words, +might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote: +Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.] + +PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one +who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead +of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the +body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and +ought we not to leave it far behind? + +CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it; +_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me. + +BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you +believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over +the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to +feed it with the juices of science. + +CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of +but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude +for.... + +PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays +strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the +purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.] + +BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion. + +CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I +will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad, +and I am greatly troubled at.... + +PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this? + +CHRY. (_to_ BELISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least +solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange +ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except +a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you +should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors +of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is +enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are +offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the +moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we +see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for +many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the +minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well, +to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy, +ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers +were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew +enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a +doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived +honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation, +and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she +worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from +behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too +deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest +secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be +known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus, +Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain +knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the +soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in +order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but +the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole +house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while +reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In +short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I +am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this +villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge +clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all +this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am +speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and +particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with +his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying +to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I +believe that he is rather cracked. + +PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language. + +BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A +reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more +vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I +hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon +the spot. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE. + +PHI. Have you any other shaft ready? + +CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak +of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage; +in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under +good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of +a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give +Henriette a proper husband, who.... + +PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you +of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are +blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the +man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit +better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have +duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a +word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the +subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you +have spoken to her. + + + + +SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE. + +ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a +talk together. + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given +her consent? Is the affair settled? + +CHRY. Not quite as yet. + +ARI. Does she refuse? + +CHRY. No. + +ARI. Then she hesitates? + +CHRY. Not in the least. + +ARI. What then? + +CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law. + +ARI. Another man for a son-in-law? + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. What is his name? + +CHRY. Mr. Trissotin. + +ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin.... + +CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin. + +ARI. And you have accepted him? + +CHRY. I? Heaven forbid! + +ARI. What did you say to it? + +CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself. + +ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end +we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her? + +CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was +better for me to say nothing. + +ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not +ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let +his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose +anything she has resolved upon? + +CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a +dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a +terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of +philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and +her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over +the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has +taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a +week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know +where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of +her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love. + +ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has +absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her +authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes +the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer +yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a +man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage +enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your +daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is +possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen +Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom +your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great +philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody +knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a +shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice. + +CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a +little more courage, brother. + +ARI. That's right. + +CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman. + +ARI. Good. + +CHRY. She has abused my gentleness. + +ARI. It is true. + +CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long. + +ARI. Certainly. + +CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter, +and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my +mind. + +ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be. + +CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to +me directly, brother. + +ARI. I will go at once. + +CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at +defiance. + + + + +ACT III. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE. + + +PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses; +they should be weighed word by word. + +ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them. + +BEL. And I am dying for them. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to +me. + +ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure. + +BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears. + +PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires. + +ARM. Lose no time. + +BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure. + +PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam, +but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your +court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since. + +PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its +father. + +TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother. + +BEL. What wit he has! + + + + +SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE. + +PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you +run away? + +HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse. + +PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing +wonders. + +HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and +witty things are not in my line. + +PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret +which you must learn. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you, +and your only care is to charm everybody. + +HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish.... + +BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you. + +PHI. (_to_ LEPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to +sit down. (LEPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you +fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium? + +BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall, +and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point +which we call the centre of gravity? + +LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground. + +PHI. (_to_ LEPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown! + +TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass. + +ARM. Ah! wit is everything! + +BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._) + +PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast. + +TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of +eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to +join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet +which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain +delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think +you will find the taste of it tolerably good. + +ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it. + +PHI. Let us quickly give audience. + +BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to +read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry +to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned. + +PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read. + +TRI. SONN.... + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece. + +ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg. + +TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1] + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes--_ + +[1] +[The sonnet is not of Moliere's invention, but is to be found in +_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris, +1663. It is called, _Sonnet a Mademoiselle de Longueville, a present +Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fievre quarte_. As, of necessity, the +translation given above is not very literal, I append the original. + + "Votre prudence est endormie, + De traiter magnifiquement, + Et de loger superbement, + Votre plus cruelle ennemie; + + Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die, + De votre riche appartement, + Ou cette ingrate insolemment + Attaque votre belle vie! + + Quoi! sans respecter votre rang, + Elle se prend a votre sang, + Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage! + + Si vous la conduisez aux bains, + Sans la marchander davantage, + Noyez-la de vos propres mains." + +The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in +Moliere's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently +true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you, +nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.] + +BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning! + +ARM. What a charming turn it has! + +PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses. + +ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is +plunged_. + +BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of +charms for me. + +PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs +joined together sound admirably. + +BEL. Let us hear the rest. + +TRI. + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes_ + +ARM. _Prudence asleep_! + +BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_! + +PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_! + +TRI. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes! + From your apartment richly lined, + Where that ingrate's outrageous mind + At your fair life her javelin throws_. + +BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you. + +ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg. + +PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something +which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint. + +ARM. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes + From your apartment richly lined_. +How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the +metaphor is introduced! + +PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what +admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the +passage is invaluable. + +ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_. + +BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy +expression. + +ARM. I wish I had written it. + +BEL. It is worth a whole poem! + +PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it? + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh + +PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another +should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips; +_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will +she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal +more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I +discover in it a hundred meanings. + +BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will +she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you +realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were +writing something so witty? + +TRI. Ah! ah! + +ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful, +unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her. + +PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to +the triplets, I pray. + +ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg. + +TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_ + +TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_ + +TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever! + +TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._ + +PHI. _Fair life!_ + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _What! without heed for your high line, + She saps your blood with care malign..._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _Redoubling outrage night and day! + If to the bath you take her down, + Without a moment's haggling, pray, + With your own hands the miscreant drown._ + +PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering. + +BEL. I faint. + +ARM. I die from pleasure. + +PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one. + +ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_ + +BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_ + +PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own +hands, there, drown her there in the bath. + +ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty. + +BEL. One promenades through them with rapture. + +PHI. One treads on fine things only. + +ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses. + +TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you.... + +PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more +beautiful. + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has +been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part! + +HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit +does not depend on our will. + +TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you. + +HEN. No. I do not listen. + +PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram. + +TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY +FRIENDS. [2] + +PHI. His titles have always something rare in them. + +ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit. + +TRI. + _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands, + E'en now it costs me more than half my lands, + And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Lais rides in triumph through the land..._ + +[2] +[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un +carosse de couleur amarante, achete pour une dame.'_ + +"L'amour si cherement m'a vendu son lien +Qu'il me coute deja la moitie de mon bien, +Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse, +Ou tant d'or se releve en bosse, +Qu'il etonne tout le pays, +Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Lais, +Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante, +Dis plutot qu'il est de ma rente."] + +PHI. Ah! Lais! what erudition! + +BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million. + +TRI. + _And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Lais rides in triumph through the land, + Say no more it is amaranth, + Say rather it is o' my rent._ + +ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected +that? + +PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste. + +BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_! +It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my +rent_. + +PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I +saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of +your composition, we could admire in our turn. + +PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I +shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of +the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he +wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I +have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at +the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will +avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by +confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime +knowledge against us. + +ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to +the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the +beauties of lace, or of a new brocade. + +BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim +our emancipation. + +TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I +render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the +splendour of their intellect. PHI. And our sex does you justice in +this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with +proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they +can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they +wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to +deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on +all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to +none. + +TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism. + +PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism. + +ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid. + +BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to +understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter. + +TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism. + +ARM. I like his vortices. + +PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary +here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than +could be given except by very long notes.] + +ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves +by some great discovery. + +TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has +hidden few things from you. + +PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one +discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon. + +BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have +seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the +day had boasted of having done this.] + +ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar, +history, verse, ethics, and politics. + +PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly +the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the +Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder. + +ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and +we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy, +we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs +and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are +preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned +meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to +purge both prose and verse. + +PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise +which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved +by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all +those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of +scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous +commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous +ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted. + +TRI. These are indeed admirable projects. + +BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready. + +TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful. + +ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws, +prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have +wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with +everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves. + + + + +SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE. + +LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to +speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone. +(_They all rise._) + +TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him +the honour of your acquaintance. + +PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us. (TRISSOTIN +_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.) + + + + +SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BELISE). At least, let us do him +all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is +going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to +you. + +HEN. But what about? + +PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject. + + + + +SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Menage who +is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In +presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing +a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits. + +PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value. + +TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows +Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France. + +PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek, +sister! + +BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek! + +ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful! + +PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of +Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BELISE _and_ +ARMANDE.) + +HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_) +Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.) + +PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books. + +VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you +to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some +learned discourse. + +PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing. + +TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he +could, if he chose, show you something. + +VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their +productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms, +or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for +me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about +begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers, +often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been +guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the +opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any +unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses +for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion. + +TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others. + +VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours. + +TRI. You have an easy style, and a fine choice of words. + +VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_. + +TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in +sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil. + +VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves +Horace far behind. + +TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets? + +VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write? + +TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus? + +VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals? + +TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad. + +VAD. And in _bouts-rimes_ I think you adorable. + +TRI. If France could appreciate your value-- + +VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius-- + +TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach. + +VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_ +TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to.... + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon +the Princess Urania's fever? + +VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday. + +TRI. Do you know the author of it? + +VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth, +his sonnet is good for nothing. + +TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable. + +VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read +it, you would think like me. + +TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few +people are able to write such a sonnet. + +VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad! + +TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is +that I am the author of it. + +VAD. You? + +TRI. Myself. + +VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened. + +TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you. + +VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader +spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my +ballad. + +TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer +the fashion, and savours of ancient times. + +VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people. + +TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant. + +VAD. That does not make it worse. + +TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants. + +VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you. + +TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others. + +(_They all rise._) + +VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me. + +TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver! + +VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession! + +TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist! + +VAD. Go, you pedantic snob! + +PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about? + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks +and Romans for all your shameful thefts. + +VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your +verses. + +TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made. + +VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse. + +TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it. + +VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote: +Boileau.] + +TRI. I, too, send you to him. + +VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him; +he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors +well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all +his verses you are exposed to his attacks. + +TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the +crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you +the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately, +as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and +his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never +thinks himself victorious. + +VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am. + +TRI. And mine will make you know your master. + +VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin. + +TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote: +Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no +doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.] + + + + +SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in +the sonnet he dares to attack. + +PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of +something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been +tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have +thought of a means of remedying this defect. + +HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for +learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much +trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head, +and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to +have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to +produce fine words. + +PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my +intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face +is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which +only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and +solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you +the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of +knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have +at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius; +(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I +intend you to marry. + +HEN. Me, mother! + +PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little. + +BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for +leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I +yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you +in society. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell +you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me.... + +HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry. + +PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You +understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her +alone for the present. + + + + +SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth; +she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband.... + +HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself? + +ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed. + +HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister. + +ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I +would accept your offer with delight. + +HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an +excellent one. + +ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have +to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in +vain do you think by resistance to.... + + + + +SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my +daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your +glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your +heart consider him as the man I want you to marry. + +ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister. + +HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over +us. + +ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience. + +CHRY. What is the meaning of this? + +ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to +agree on this point, and this other husband.... + +CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please +with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done, +and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once! + + + + +SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders! + +CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me! + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us; +take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How +moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age, +and I can still remember my youthful loving days. + + + + +ACT IV. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE. + + +ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her +obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She +seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at +defiance the will of her mother. + +PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason +subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or +body, form or matter. + +ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and +that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite +of yourself, behaves himself strangely. + +PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him +well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always +unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and +yet he has never desired me to read anything to him. + + + + +SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and +listening unseen_). + +ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's +husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of +speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think +that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of +philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can +rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond +all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not +a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never +could see that he had in his heart any respect for you. + +PHI. Poor idiot! + +ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in +praising you. + +PHI. The churl! + +ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions, +without his ever thinking them fine. + +PHI. The impertinent fellow! + +ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe +what foolish things.... + +CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at +least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what +am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to +destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me +odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great +indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam, +an impartial judge between us. + +ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find +enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has +such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose +fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be +compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless +heart is a monster of immorality. + +CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your +mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it +imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the +offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For +two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care, +duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my +attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed +to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another. +Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after +change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather +turn me away? + +ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it +of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the +purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me +keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense; +and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in +which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material +passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you +must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How +far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The +senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites +the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame +pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only +sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is +mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of +loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their +transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget. + +CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so, +that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached +to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this +separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul +go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that +purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the +soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But +such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross +and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given +to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for +lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble +sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue; +that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable +and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without +giving you cause to be offended at such a thought. + +ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say, +your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a +faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will, +if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you +wish. + +CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to +return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I +sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled +when you disdained me. + +PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my +consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it +enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not +expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny +of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux +esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to +translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself +beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed +to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of +the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives +nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us. +Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has +made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid +verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them. + +PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him +with other eyes than you do. + + + + +SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We +have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us, +and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_. +Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way +it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so +much glass. + +PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman +would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and +above all to hate intellect and knowledge. + +CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain +myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils +people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather +be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain +people. + +TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the +contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything. + +CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and +in deeds. + +TRI. The paradox is rather strong. + +CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very +clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be +wanting. + +TRI. You might cite some without proving your point. + +CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want. + +TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples. + +CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me. + +TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and +not knowledge. + +CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is +more of a fool than an ignorant one. + +TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a +fool are synonymous. + +CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater +connection between pedant and fool. + +TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly. + +CLI. And study adds to nature in the other. + +TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value. + +CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence. + +TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly +take up arms in its defence. + +CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with +learned people of a certain kind. + +TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them +well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind. + +CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a +question with certain people. + +PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir.... + +CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough +without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an +adversary, and as I fight I retreat. + +ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers.... + +CLI. Another ally! I quit the field. + +PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no +one in particular. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can +bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many +other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it. + +TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this +contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The +court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a +certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he +takes up its defence. + +CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great +indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it; +making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for +its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success. +Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which +your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you, +to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is +not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has +good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can +be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without +flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry. + +TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir. + +CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad? + +TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour +to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no +notice from the court. + +CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you +forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me +what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their +writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible +injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours +on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France! +and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These +wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed +and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the +state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that +at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured +down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon +them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think +themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have +said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and +ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming +themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the +indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in +books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for +all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything, +void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they +decry everywhere true learning and knowledge. + +PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows +the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which +excites in your breast.... + + + + +SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN. + +JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and +whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this +letter. + +PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a +piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a +servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the +household to be introduced. + +JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book. + +PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry +your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your +wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage +before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While +you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in +all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus, +where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has +pilfered._" + +We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I +have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an +action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it +does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your +master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I +set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I +esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this +gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). + + + + +SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may +assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you +to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister +of my decision. + +ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman +will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her +heart to rebellion. + +PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring +her to a sense of her duty. + + + + +SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite +according to your views. + +CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety +upon your mind. + +ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful. + +CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation. + +ARM. I hope it may be so. + +CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help. + +ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power. + +CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful. + + + + +SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for +your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in +favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law. + +CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in +the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin? + +ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is +carrying it off over the head of his rival. + +CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night. + +CHRY. To-night? + +CLI. Yes, to-night. + +CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have +you both married. + +CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract. + +CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up. + +CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to +which she must look forward. + +CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for +this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master +but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will +return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my +son-in-law. + +HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition. + +ARI. I will do everything to serve your love. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my +greatest hope is in your constancy. + +HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love. + +CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that. + +HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me. + +CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to +fear. + +HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes, +and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have +resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else. + +CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of +your love. + + + + +ACT V. + +SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN. + + +HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon +that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that, +seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you +listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a +considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has +no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly +grandeur should not show itself in your words only. + +TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your +dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble +air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows +and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured. + +HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and +to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one +can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You +know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that +Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much +less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice +of a husband, and that with your many talents you ought to please me. +I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that +reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness. + +TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give +me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I +have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved. + +HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by +your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my +confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which +springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but +is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases +us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love, +all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus +guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the +violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of +honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he +feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and +will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to +exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up +your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so +precious as yours. + +TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it +can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be +loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms.... + +HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so +many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses +you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that.... + +TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is +only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the +adorable Henriette. + +HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you.... + +TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love, +ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can +put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty +condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who +wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining +such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little +to me how it comes to pass. + +HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by +using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry +a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain +revenge that a husband should fear. + +TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A +philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all +vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from +minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for +Wives,' act iv. scene vi.] + +HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that +philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with +constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit +subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in +giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the +truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another; +and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the +happiness of seeing you my husband. + +TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end. +In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting. + + + + +SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your +duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach +your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is +Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house +again. + +HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to +change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved, +and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do +not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having +her own way. + +CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby? + +HEN. Heaven forbid! + +CHRY. Am I a fool, pray? + +HEN. I do not say that. + +CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense? + +HEN. No, father. + +CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home? + +HEN. Of course. + +CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the +nose? + +HEN. Oh dear, no, father. + +CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me +as you do! + +HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally. + +CHRY. My will is law in this place. + +HEN. Certainly, father. + +CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command. + +HEN. Yes, you are right, father. + +CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family. + +HEN. Agreed. + +CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand. + +HEN. Yes, indeed, father. + +CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you. + +HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary. + +CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your +father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey. + +HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to +you is my earnest wish. + +CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will. + +CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her. + +CHRY. Back me up, all of you. + +MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be. + + + + +SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, +CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style, +and give us a contract couched in noble language? + +NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to +try and change a single word. + +BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for +learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to +have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date +in Ides and Kalends. + +NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would +hiss me. + +PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit +down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares +to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to +know? + +CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do. + +NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride? + +PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage. + +NOT. Good. + +CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is +Henriette. + +NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom? + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give +her. + +CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry +is this gentleman. + +NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down +Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law. + +CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre. + +NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is +to be the future husband. + +PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice. + +CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will. + +NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey. + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes. + +CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of +the wealth which is in my family. + +PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it +were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man. + +CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre. + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband +she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing +is settled. + +CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone. + +MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up +the lead to the men in everything. + +CHRY. That is well said. + +MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the +hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there. + +CHRY. Just so. + +MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his +wife wears the breeches. + +CHRY. It is perfectly true. + +MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master +of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the +henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke +too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on +the ear, he made me pitch it lower. + +CHRY. You speak as you ought. + +MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter. + +CHRY. Certainly. + +MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in +order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about +something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares +neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin. + +CHRY. Excellent. + +PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease. + +MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have +said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my +husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books +agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to +anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who +doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in +short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this +scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly +at times.] + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened +patiently enough to your worthy interpreter? + +CHRY. She has only said the truth. + +PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed. +(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be +united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply; +and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister. + +CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE +and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent? + +HEN. How! father...! + +CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...! + +BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are +establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star; +the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance. + + + + +SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE, +TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE. + +ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad +tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me +bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney. +(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons. + +PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us? + +ARI. You can read it in this letter. + +PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it +will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself. +The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause +that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have +altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_ + +CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost! + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no +way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind +wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost +you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with +all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for +criminals. + +ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest +against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the +court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs." + +PHI. Let us see the other. + +CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts +me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you +had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon, +and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O +Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment! + +PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the +truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he +still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and +please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth +will be sufficient for us and for him. + +TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further. +I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no +intention of forcing the wills of others. + +PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of +fortune. + +TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to +relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for +a heart that will not surrender itself. + +PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto +refused to believe. + +TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how +you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of +the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of +more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble +servant. (_Exit_.) + + + + +SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, +CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE. + +PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little +like a philosopher he has acted. + +CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my +destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess. + +PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward +your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection.... + +HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist +your will. + +CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody +for me.... + +HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired +you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw +that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such +reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity. + +CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery. + +HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the +torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more +than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of +all the sorrows that follow such an engagement. + +ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason +which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre? + +HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with +all my heart. + +ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news +I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to +serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her +philosopher would prove when put to the test. + +CHRY. Heaven be praised! + +PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly +deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to +see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded. + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her. + +ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love? + +PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your +philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned. + +BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart. +Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they +repent ever after. + +CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up +the contract in accordance with what I said. + + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin) + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + +***** This file should be named 8772.txt or 8772.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/8/7/7/8772/ + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You can also find out about how to make a +donation to Project Gutenberg, and how to get involved. + + +**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** + +**eBooks Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** + +*****These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!***** + + +Title: The Learned Women + +Author: Moliere (Poquelin) + +Release Date: August, 2005 [EBook #8772] +[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule] +[This file was first posted on August 12, 2003] + +Edition: 10 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + + + + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + + + + +THE LEARNED WOMEN + +(LES FEMMES SAVANTES) + + +BY + +MOLIERE + + +TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH PROSE. + +_WITH SHORT INTRODUCTIONS AND EXPLANATORY NOTES_ + + +BY + +CHARLES HERON WALL + + + +The comedy of 'Les Femmes Savantes' was acted on March 11, 1692 (see +vol. i. p. 153). + +Moliere acted the part of Chrysale. + + + + +PERSONS REPRESENTED + +CHRYSALE, _an honest bourgeois_ + +PHILAMINTE, _wife to_ CHRYSALE + +ARMANDE & HENRIETTE, _their daughters_ + +ARISTE, _brother to_ CHRYSALE + +BELISE, _his sister_ + +CLITANDRE, _lover to_ HENRIETTE + +TRISSOTIN, _a wit_ + +VADIUS, _a learned man_ + +MARTINE, _a kitchen-maid_ + +LEPINE, _servant to_ CHRYSALE + +JULIEN, _servant to_ VADIUS + +A NOTARY. + + + +THE LEARNED WOMEN. + + + + +ACT I. + +SCENE I.--ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + + +ARM. What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of +maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can +enter your head! + +HEN. Yes, sister. + +ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings +of disgust? + +HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to.... + +ARM. Ah! Fie! + +HEN. What? + +ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very +mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a +repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before +it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which +this word implies? + +HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I +only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and +I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one +shudder. + +ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you? + +HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves +me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the +delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you +see no attraction in such a bond? + +ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you +act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think +of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a +husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the +low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour +to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and +matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the +cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is +everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove +yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which +is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous +pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind. +Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself, +sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of +mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the +animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level +of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which +should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many +women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities. + +HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill +different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of +materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar +to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned +men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its +weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with +the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different +instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will +inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will +taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths, +we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble +longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the +productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more +material. + +ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side +we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model, +sister, to cough and spit like her. + +HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our +mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that +her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray, +leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by +wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the +world. + +ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of +taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend +to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre? + +HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I +have made? + +ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the +conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that +Clitandre has publicly sighed for me. + +HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not +share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony, +and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no +pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has +such pretensions? + +ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon +us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a +husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of +our admirers. + +HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have +only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it. + +ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected +lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me +can be dead in his heart? + +HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him. + +ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when +he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but +deceives himself. + +HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to +discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point +he will be sure to give us full information. + + + + +SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me. +Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which +of us has a claim upon your love. + +ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an +explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how +perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses. + +CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to +speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge +before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me +(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this +side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished +things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender +sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an +immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had +made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over +my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked +elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel. +(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds +will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with +compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you +had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing +which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never +to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this +gentle bondage. + +ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in +short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous +that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to +declare it to me. + +HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so +much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can +restrain the madness of anger? + +ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you +respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received +leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you +to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their +choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is +criminal in you to dispose of it yourself. + +HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my +duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced; +and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see +that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I +have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me +the power of loving you without a crime. + +CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind +permission from you. + +ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me +pain. + +HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will +always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons +you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far +from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use +your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will +by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech +you to do so; and in order to secure this end.... + +ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you +seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you. + +HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked +by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even +condescend to do so. + +ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating. + +HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation. + + + + +SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback. + +CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of +her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave, +I will go to your father, to.... + +HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father +easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he +himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness +which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who +governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she +has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more +pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall +in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem. + +CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in +your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female +doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of +everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of +wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that +she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In +short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without +publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of +pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly +respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make +myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she +bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and +wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such +a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings +are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the +markets with wastepaper. + +HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is +unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he +possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to +yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is +engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have +nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house. + +CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot +consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising +his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice, +and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he +writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the +persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good +opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at +all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings +of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all +the honours of the greatest general. + +HEN. You have good eyes to see all that. + +CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with +which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I +pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a +man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of +the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be +Trissotin--and I won my wager. + +HEN. What a tale! + +CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your +aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my +heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother. + + + + +SCENE IV.--BELISE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to +reveal to you his sincere devotion.... + +BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me; +although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no +interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language +desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my +charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your +secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but +if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my +sight. + +CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is, +Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to +favour the love I have for her. + +BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle +evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over, +I have never met with anything more ingenious. + +CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my +heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the +ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains; +and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much +towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will +condescend to second my addresses. + +BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I +understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and +not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against +matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your +love returned. + +CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will +you persist in believing what is not? + +BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what +your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am +content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and +that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to +suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by +honour, offer only pure vows on my altars. + +CLI. But.... + +BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more +than I wished to say. + +CLI. But your error.... + +BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear. + +CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Moliere ends +this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to +find a rhyme to _davantage._] + +BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more. + + + + +SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_) + +Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so +preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of +more sense. + + + +ACT II. + +SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to +him_). + + +Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press, +insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say +when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he +desires! Never.... + + + + +SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +ARI. Good day to you, brother. + +CHRY. And to you also, brother. + +ARI. Do you know what brings me here? + +CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to +tell me. + +ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now? + +CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house. + +ARI. And what do you think of him? + +CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and +uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit. + +ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see +the esteem you have for him. + +CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome. + +ARI. Ah! + +CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman. + +ARI. So it is said. + +CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word, +we were, both of us, very gay young fellows. + +ARI. I believe it. + +CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke +of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you. + +ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here. + + + + +SCENE III.--BELISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE, +ARISTE. + +ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has +fallen in love with Henriette. + +CHRY. What! with my daughter? + +ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover +so smitten! + +BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the +story, and the thing is not as you imagine. + +ARI. How so, sister? + +BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love. + +ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking. + +BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth. + +ARI. He told me so himself. + +BEL. Doubtless. + +ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her +father. + +BEL. Yes, I know. + +ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time +of an alliance so desired by him. + +BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been +employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an +ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the +mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both. + +ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves. + +BEL. You wish to know? + +ARI. Yes; who is it? BEL. Me! + +ARI. You! + +BEL. Myself. + +ARI. Come, I say! sister! + +BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so +wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to +have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante, +Damis, Cleonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms. + +ARI. Do those men love you? + +BEL. Yes; with all their might. + +ARI. They have told you so? + +BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present +time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their +love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering +their hearts and lives to me. + +ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here. + +BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission. + +ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere. + +BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion. + +ARI. Cleonte and Lycidas are both married. + +BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love. + +ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions. + +CHRY. (to BELISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies. + +BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle +fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at +those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted +to idle fancies. + + + + +SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy. + +ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that +brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage. +Tell me what answer we can make to his love. + +CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider +his alliance a great honour. + +ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that.... + +CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and +that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one +mind in two bodies. + +ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable +to.... + +CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law. + +ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have +her agree to it also. Let us go.... + +CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife, +and take the business upon myself. + +ARI. But.... + +CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare +her this moment. + +ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and +will return to know.... + +CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to +my wife about it. + + + + +SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a +dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other +folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no +inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.] + +CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine? + +MAR. What is the matter? + +CHRY. Yes. + +MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir. + +CHRY. Sent away? + +MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out. + +CHRY. I don't understand; why has she? + +MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go. + +CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife +is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no.... + + + + +SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick, +leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again. + +CHRY. Gently. + +PHI. No; I will have it so. + +CHRY. What? + +PHI. I insist upon her going. + +CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way +to...? + +PHI. What! you take her part? + +CHRY. Certainly not. + +PHI. You side with her against me? + +CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of. + +PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause? + +CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with servants.... + +PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you. + +CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary? + +PHI. I will have no opposition to my will. + +CHRY. Agreed. + +PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against +her, and share my anger. + +CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right +in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be +forgiven. + +MAR. What is it I have done, then? + +CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know. + +PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing. + +CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some +china? + +PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you +fancy that I should get angry for so little? + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then? + +PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable? + +CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish +to be stolen from us? + +PHI. That would be of little moment. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE) +What! has she shown herself dishonest? + +PHI. It is worse than that. + +CHRY. Worse than that? + +PHI. Worse. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) What! has she...? + +PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons, +insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned +in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born +about 1585; died 1650.] + +CHRY. Is that...? + +PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the +foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and +makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws. + +CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime. + +PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable? + +CHRY. Yes, yes. + +PHI. I should like to see you excuse her. + +CHRY. Heaven forbid! + +BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet +she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language. + +MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't +understand your jargon, not I. + +PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on +reason and polite custom a jargon! + +MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your +fine speeches don't do me no good. + +PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no +good!_ + +BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we +daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting +_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as +you have been told, a negative too many. + +MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as +they speaks in our place. + +PHI. Ah! who can bear it? + +BEL. What a horrible solecism! + +PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear. + +BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding; +_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular. +Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in +Moliere's time was pronounced as _grand'mere_ is now. _Gammer_ +seems the nearest approach to this in English.] + +MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer? + +PHI. O heavens! + +BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told +you a hundred times where the word comes from. + +MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise, +[Footnote: In Moliere's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious +little. + +BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the +verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive. + +MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people. + +PHI. What martyrdom! + +BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree +with each other. + +MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out? + +PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a +discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away? + +CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go, +don't provoke her, Martine. + +PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in +quite an obliging tone. + +CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place. +(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl. + + + + +SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BELISE. + +CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of +sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she +has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle. + +PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to +torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and +reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of +garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the +gutters of all the market-places? + +BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls +Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are +either pleonasm or cacophony. + +CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of +Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather +that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the +verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that +she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on +good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to +make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words, +might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote: +Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.] + +PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one +who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead +of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the +body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and +ought we not to leave it far behind? + +CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it; +_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me. + +BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you +believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over +the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to +feed it with the juices of science. + +CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of +but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude +for.... + +PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays +strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the +purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.] + +BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion. + +CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I +will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad, +and I am greatly troubled at.... + +PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this? + +CHRY. (_to_ BELISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least +solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange +ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except +a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you +should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors +of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is +enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are +offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the +moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we +see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for +many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the +minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well, +to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy, +ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers +were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew +enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a +doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived +honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation, +and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she +worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from +behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too +deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest +secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be +known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus, +Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain +knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the +soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in +order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but +the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole +house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while +reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In +short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I +am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this +villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge +clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all +this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am +speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and +particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with +his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying +to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I +believe that he is rather cracked. + +PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language. + +BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A +reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more +vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I +hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon +the spot. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE. + +PHI. Have you any other shaft ready? + +CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak +of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage; +in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under +good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of +a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give +Henriette a proper husband, who.... + +PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you +of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are +blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the +man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit +better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have +duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a +word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the +subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you +have spoken to her. + + + + +SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE. + +ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a +talk together. + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given +her consent? Is the affair settled? + +CHRY. Not quite as yet. + +ARI. Does she refuse? + +CHRY. No. + +ARI. Then she hesitates? + +CHRY. Not in the least. + +ARI. What then? + +CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law. + +ARI. Another man for a son-in-law? + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. What is his name? + +CHRY. Mr. Trissotin. + +ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin.... + +CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin. + +ARI. And you have accepted him? + +CHRY. I? Heaven forbid! + +ARI. What did you say to it? + +CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself. + +ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end +we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her? + +CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was +better for me to say nothing. + +ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not +ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let +his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose +anything she has resolved upon? + +CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a +dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a +terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of +philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and +her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over +the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has +taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a +week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know +where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of +her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love. + +ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has +absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her +authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes +the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer +yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a +man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage +enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your +daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is +possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen +Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom +your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great +philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody +knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a +shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice. + +CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a +little more courage, brother. + +ARI. That's right. + +CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman. + +ARI. Good. + +CHRY. She has abused my gentleness. + +ARI. It is true. + +CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long. + +ARI. Certainly. + +CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter, +and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my +mind. + +ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be. + +CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to +me directly, brother. + +ARI. I will go at once. + +CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at +defiance. + + + + +ACT III. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE. + + +PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses; +they should be weighed word by word. + +ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them. + +BEL. And I am dying for them. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to +me. + +ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure. + +BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears. + +PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires. + +ARM. Lose no time. + +BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure. + +PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam, +but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your +court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since. + +PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its +father. + +TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother. + +BEL. What wit he has! + + + + +SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE. + +PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you +run away? + +HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse. + +PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing +wonders. + +HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and +witty things are not in my line. + +PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret +which you must learn. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you, +and your only care is to charm everybody. + +HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish.... + +BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you. + +PHI. (_to_ LEPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to +sit down. (LEPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you +fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium? + +BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall, +and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point +which we call the centre of gravity? + +LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground. + +PHI. (_to_ LEPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown! + +TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass. + +ARM. Ah! wit is everything! + +BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._) + +PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast. + +TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of +eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to +join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet +which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain +delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think +you will find the taste of it tolerably good. + +ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it. + +PHI. Let us quickly give audience. + +BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to +read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry +to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned. + +PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read. + +TRI. SONN.... + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece. + +ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg. + +TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1] + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes--_ + +[1] +[The sonnet is not of Moliere's invention, but is to be found in +_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris, +1663. It is called, _Sonnet a Mademoiselle de Longueville, a present +Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fievre quarte_. As, of necessity, the +translation given above is not very literal, I append the original. + + "Votre prudence est endormie, + De traiter magnifiquement, + Et de loger superbement, + Votre plus cruelle ennemie; + + Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die, + De votre riche appartement, + Ou cette ingrate insolemment + Attaque votre belle vie! + + Quoi! sans respecter votre rang, + Elle se prend a votre sang, + Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage! + + Si vous la conduisez aux bains, + Sans la marchander davantage, + Noyez-la de vos propres mains." + +The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in +Moliere's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently +true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you, +nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.] + +BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning! + +ARM. What a charming turn it has! + +PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses. + +ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is +plunged_. + +BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of +charms for me. + +PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs +joined together sound admirably. + +BEL. Let us hear the rest. + +TRI. + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes_ + +ARM. _Prudence asleep_! + +BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_! + +PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_! + +TRI. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes! + From your apartment richly lined, + Where that ingrate's outrageous mind + At your fair life her javelin throws_. + +BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you. + +ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg. + +PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something +which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint. + +ARM. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes + From your apartment richly lined_. +How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the +metaphor is introduced! + +PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what +admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the +passage is invaluable. + +ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_. + +BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy +expression. + +ARM. I wish I had written it. + +BEL. It is worth a whole poem! + +PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it? + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh + +PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another +should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips; +_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will +she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal +more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I +discover in it a hundred meanings. + +BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will +she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you +realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were +writing something so witty? + +TRI. Ah! ah! + +ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful, +unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her. + +PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to +the triplets, I pray. + +ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg. + +TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_ + +TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_ + +TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever! + +TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._ + +PHI. _Fair life!_ + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _What! without heed for your high line, + She saps your blood with care malign..._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _Redoubling outrage night and day! + If to the bath you take her down, + Without a moment's haggling, pray, + With your own hands the miscreant drown._ + +PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering. + +BEL. I faint. + +ARM. I die from pleasure. + +PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one. + +ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_ + +BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_ + +PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own +hands, there, drown her there in the bath. + +ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty. + +BEL. One promenades through them with rapture. + +PHI. One treads on fine things only. + +ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses. + +TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you.... + +PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more +beautiful. + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has +been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part! + +HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit +does not depend on our will. + +TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you. + +HEN. No. I do not listen. + +PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram. + +TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY +FRIENDS. [2] + +PHI. His titles have always something rare in them. + +ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit. + +TRI. + _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands, + E'en now it costs me more than half my lands, + And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Lais rides in triumph through the land..._ + +[2] +[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un +carosse de couleur amarante, achete pour une dame.'_ + +"L'amour si cherement m'a vendu son lien +Qu'il me coute deja la moitie de mon bien, +Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse, +Ou tant d'or se releve en bosse, +Qu'il etonne tout le pays, +Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Lais, +Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante, +Dis plutot qu'il est de ma rente."] + +PHI. Ah! Lais! what erudition! + +BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million. + +TRI. + _And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Lais rides in triumph through the land, + Say no more it is amaranth, + Say rather it is o' my rent._ + +ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected +that? + +PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste. + +BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_! +It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my +rent_. + +PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I +saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of +your composition, we could admire in our turn. + +PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I +shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of +the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he +wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I +have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at +the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will +avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by +confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime +knowledge against us. + +ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to +the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the +beauties of lace, or of a new brocade. + +BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim +our emancipation. + +TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I +render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the +splendour of their intellect. PHI. And our sex does you justice in +this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with +proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they +can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they +wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to +deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on +all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to +none. + +TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism. + +PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism. + +ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid. + +BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to +understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter. + +TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism. + +ARM. I like his vortices. + +PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary +here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than +could be given except by very long notes.] + +ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves +by some great discovery. + +TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has +hidden few things from you. + +PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one +discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon. + +BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have +seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the +day had boasted of having done this.] + +ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar, +history, verse, ethics, and politics. + +PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly +the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the +Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder. + +ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and +we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy, +we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs +and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are +preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned +meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to +purge both prose and verse. + +PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise +which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved +by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all +those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of +scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous +commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous +ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted. + +TRI. These are indeed admirable projects. + +BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready. + +TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful. + +ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws, +prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have +wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with +everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves. + + + + +SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LEPINE. + +LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to +speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone. +(_They all rise._) + +TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him +the honour of your acquaintance. + +PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us. (TRISSOTIN +_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.) + + + + +SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BELISE). At least, let us do him +all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is +going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to +you. + +HEN. But what about? + +PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject. + + + + +SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Menage who +is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In +presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing +a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits. + +PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value. + +TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows +Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France. + +PHI. (_to_ BELISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek, +sister! + +BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek! + +ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful! + +PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of +Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BELISE _and_ +ARMANDE.) + +HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_) +Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.) + +PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books. + +VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you +to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some +learned discourse. + +PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing. + +TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he +could, if he chose, show you something. + +VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their +productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms, +or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for +me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about +begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers, +often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been +guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the +opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any +unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses +for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion. + +TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others. + +VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours. TRI. You have an easy +style, and a fine choice of words. + +VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_. + +TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in +sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil. + +VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves +Horace far behind. + +TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets? + +VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write? + +TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus? + +VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals? + +TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad. + +VAD. And in _bouts-rimes_ I think you adorable. + +TRI. If France could appreciate your value-- + +VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius-- + +TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach. + +VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_ +TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to.... + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon +the Princess Urania's fever? + +VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday. + +TRI. Do you know the author of it? + +VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth, +his sonnet is good for nothing. + +TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable. + +VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read +it, you would think like me. + +TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few +people are able to write such a sonnet. + +VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad! + +TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is +that I am the author of it. + +VAD. You? + +TRI. Myself. + +VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened. + +TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you. + +VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader +spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my +ballad. + +TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer +the fashion, and savours of ancient times. + +VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people. + +TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant. + +VAD. That does not make it worse. + +TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants. + +VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you. + +TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others. + +(_They all rise._) + +VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me. + +TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver! + +VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession! + +TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist! + +VAD. Go, you pedantic snob! + +PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about? + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks +and Romans for all your shameful thefts. + +VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your +verses. + +TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made. + +VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse. + +TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it. + +VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote: +Boileau.] + +TRI. I, too, send you to him. + +VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him; +he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors +well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all +his verses you are exposed to his attacks. + +TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the +crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you +the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately, +as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and +his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never +thinks himself victorious. + +VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am. + +TRI. And mine will make you know your master. + +VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin. + +TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote: +Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no +doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.] + + + + +SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BELISE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in +the sonnet he dares to attack. + +PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of +something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been +tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have +thought of a means of remedying this defect. + +HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for +learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much +trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head, +and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to +have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to +produce fine words. + +PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my +intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face +is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which +only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and +solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you +the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of +knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have +at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius; +(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I +intend you to marry. + +HEN. Me, mother! + +PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little. + +BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for +leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I +yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you +in society. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell +you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me.... + +HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry. + +PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You +understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her +alone for the present. + + + + +SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth; +she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband.... + +HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself? + +ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed. + +HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister. + +ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I +would accept your offer with delight. + +HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an +excellent one. + +ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have +to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in +vain do you think by resistance to.... + + + + +SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my +daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your +glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your +heart consider him as the man I want you to marry. + +ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister. + +HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over +us. + +ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience. + +CHRY. What is the meaning of this? + +ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to +agree on this point, and this other husband.... + +CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please +with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done, +and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once! + + + + +SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders! + +CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me! + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us; +take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How +moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age, +and I can still remember my youthful loving days. + + + + +ACT IV. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE. + + +ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her +obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She +seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at +defiance the will of her mother. + +PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason +subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or +body, form or matter. + +ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and +that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite +of yourself, behaves himself strangely. + +PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him +well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always +unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and +yet he has never desired me to read anything to him. + + + + +SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and +listening unseen_). + +ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's +husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of +speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think +that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of +philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can +rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond +all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not +a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never +could see that he had in his heart any respect for you. + +PHI. Poor idiot! + +ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in +praising you. + +PHI. The churl! + +ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions, +without his ever thinking them fine. + +PHI. The impertinent fellow! + +ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe +what foolish things.... + +CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at +least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what +am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to +destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me +odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great +indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam, +an impartial judge between us. + +ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find +enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has +such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose +fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be +compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless +heart is a monster of immorality. + +CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your +mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it +imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the +offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For +two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care, +duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my +attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed +to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another. +Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after +change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather +turn me away? + +ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it +of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the +purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me +keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense; +and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in +which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material +passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you +must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How +far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The +senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites +the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame +pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only +sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is +mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of +loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their +transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget. + +CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so, +that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached +to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this +separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul +go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that +purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the +soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But +such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross +and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given +to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for +lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble +sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue; +that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable +and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without +giving you cause to be offended at such a thought. + +ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say, +your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a +faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will, +if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you +wish. + +CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to +return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I +sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled +when you disdained me. + +PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my +consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it +enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not +expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny +of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux +esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to +translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself +beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed +to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of +the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives +nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us. +Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has +made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid +verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them. + +PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him +with other eyes than you do. + + + + +SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We +have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us, +and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_. +Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way +it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so +much glass. + +PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman +would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and +above all to hate intellect and knowledge. + +CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain +myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils +people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather +be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain +people. + +TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the +contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything. + +CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and +in deeds. + +TRI. The paradox is rather strong. + +CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very +clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be +wanting. + +TRI. You might cite some without proving your point. + +CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want. + +TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples. + +CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me. + +TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and +not knowledge. + +CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is +more of a fool than an ignorant one. + +TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a +fool are synonymous. + +CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater +connection between pedant and fool. + +TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly. + +CLI. And study adds to nature in the other. + +TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value. + +CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence. + +TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly +take up arms in its defence. + +CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with +learned people of a certain kind. + +TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them +well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind. + +CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a +question with certain people. + +PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir.... + +CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough +without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an +adversary, and as I fight I retreat. + +ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers.... + +CLI. Another ally! I quit the field. + +PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no +one in particular. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can +bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many +other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it. + +TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this +contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The +court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a +certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he +takes up its defence. + +CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great +indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it; +making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for +its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success. +Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which +your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you, +to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is +not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has +good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can +be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without +flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry. + +TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir. + +CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad? + +TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour +to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no +notice from the court. + +CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you +forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me +what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their +writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible +injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours +on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France! +and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These +wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed +and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the +state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that +at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured +down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon +them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think +themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have +said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and +ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming +themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the +indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in +books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for +all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything, +void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they +decry everywhere true learning and knowledge. + +PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows +the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which +excites in your breast.... + + + + +SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN. + +JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and +whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this +letter. + +PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a +piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a +servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the +household to be introduced. + +JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book. + +PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry +your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your +wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage +before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While +you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in +all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus, +where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has +pilfered._" + +We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I +have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an +action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it +does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your +master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I +set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I +esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this +gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). + + + + +SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may +assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you +to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister +of my decision. + +ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman +will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her +heart to rebellion. + +PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring +her to a sense of her duty. + + + + +SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite +according to your views. + +CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety +upon your mind. + +ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful. + +CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation. + +ARM. I hope it may be so. + +CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help. + +ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power. + +CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful. + + + + +SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for +your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in +favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law. + +CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in +the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin? + +ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is +carrying it off over the head of his rival. + +CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night. + +CHRY. To-night? + +CLI. Yes, to-night. + +CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have +you both married. + +CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract. + +CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up. + +CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to +which she must look forward. + +CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for +this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master +but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will +return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my +son-in-law. + +HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition. + +ARI. I will do everything to serve your love. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my +greatest hope is in your constancy. + +HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love. + +CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that. + +HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me. + +CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to +fear. + +HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes, +and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have +resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else. + +CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of +your love. + + + + +ACT V. + +SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN. + + +HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon +that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that, +seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you +listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a +considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has +no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly +grandeur should not show itself in your words only. + +TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your +dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble +air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows +and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured. + +HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and +to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one +can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You +know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that +Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much +less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice +of a husband, and that with your many talents yon ought to please me. +I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that +reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness. + +TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give +me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I +have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved. + +HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by +your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my +confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which +springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but +is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases +us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love, +all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus +guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the +violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of +honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he +feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and +will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to +exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up +your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so +precious as yours. + +TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it +can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be +loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms.... + +HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so +many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses +you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that.... + +TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is +only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the +adorable Henriette. + +HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you.... + +TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love, +ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can +put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty +condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who +wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining +such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little +to me how it comes to pass. + +HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by +using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry +a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain +revenge that a husband should fear. + +TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A +philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all +vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from +minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for +Wives,' act iv. scene vi.] + +HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that +philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with +constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit +subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in +giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the +truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another; +and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the +happiness of seeing you my husband. + +TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end. +In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting. + + + + +SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your +duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach +your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is +Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house +again. + +HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to +change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved, +and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do +not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having +her own way. + +CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby? + +HEN. Heaven forbid! + +CHRY. Am I a fool, pray? + +HEN. I do not say that. + +CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense? + +HEN. No, father. + +CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home? + +HEN. Of course. + +CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the +nose? + +HEN. Oh dear, no, father. + +CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me +as you do! + +HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally. + +CHRY. My will is law in this place. + +HEN. Certainly, father. + +CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command. + +HEN. Yes, you are right, father. + +CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family. + +HEN. Agreed. + +CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand. + +HEN. Yes, indeed, father. + +CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you. + +HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary. + +CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your +father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey. + +HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to +you is my earnest wish. + +CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will. + +CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her. + +CHRY. Back me up, all of you. + +MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be. + + + + +SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, +CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style, +and give us a contract couched in noble language? + +NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to +try and change a single word. + +BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for +learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to +have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date +in Ides and Kalends. + +NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would +hiss me. + +PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit +down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares +to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to +know? + +CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do. + +NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride? + +PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage. + +NOT. Good. + +CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is +Henriette. + +NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom? + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give +her. + +CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry +is this gentleman. + +NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down +Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law. + +CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre. + +NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is +to be the future husband. + +PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice. + +CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will. + +NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey. + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes. + +CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of +the wealth which is in my family. + +PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it +were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man. + +CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre. + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband +she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing +is settled. + +CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone. + +MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up +the lead to the men in everything. + +CHRY. That is well said. + +MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the +hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there. + +CHRY. Just so. + +MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his +wife wears the breeches. + +CHRY. It is perfectly true. + +MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master +of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the +henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke +too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on +the ear, he made me pitch it lower. + +CHRY. You speak as you ought. + +MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter. + +CHRY. Certainly. + +MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in +order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about +something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares +neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin. + +CHRY. Excellent. + +PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease. + +MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have +said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my +husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books +agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to +anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who +doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in +short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this +scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly +at times.] + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened +patiently enough to your worthy interpreter? + +CHRY. She has only said the truth. + +PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed. +(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be +united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply; +and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister. + +CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE +and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent? + +HEN. How! father...! + +CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...! + +BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are +establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star; +the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance. + + + + +SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE, +TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE. + +ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad +tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me +bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney. +(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons. + +PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us? + +ARI. You can read it in this letter. + +PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it +will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself. +The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause +that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have +altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_ + +CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost! + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no +way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind +wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost +you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with +all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for +criminals. + +ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest +against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the +court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs." + +PHI. Let us see the other. + +CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts +me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you +had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon, +and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O +Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment! + +PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the +truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he +still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and +please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth +will be sufficient for us and for him. + +TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further. +I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no +intention of forcing the wills of others. + +PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of +fortune. + +TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to +relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for +a heart that will not surrender itself. + +PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto +refused to believe. + +TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how +you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of +the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of +more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble +servant. (_Exit_.) + + + + +SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BELISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, +CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE. + +PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little +like a philosopher he has acted. + +CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my +destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess. + +PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward +your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection.... + +HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist +your will. + +CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody +for me.... + +HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired +you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw +that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such +reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity. + +CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery. + +HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the +torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more +than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of +all the sorrows that follow such an engagement. + +ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason +which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre? + +HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with +all my heart. + +ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news +I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to +serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her +philosopher would prove when put to the test. + +CHRY. Heaven be praised! + +PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly +deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to +see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded. + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her. + +ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love? + +PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your +philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned. + +BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart. +Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they +repent ever after. + +CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up +the contract in accordance with what I said. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin) + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + +This file should be named 7lwom10.txt or 7lwom10.zip +Corrected EDITIONS of our eBooks get a new NUMBER, 7lwom11.txt +VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, 7lwom10a.txt + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + +Project Gutenberg eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the US +unless a copyright notice is included. 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What! Sister, you will give up the sweet and enchanting title of +maiden? You can entertain thoughts of marrying! This vulgar wish can +enter your head! + +HEN. Yes, sister. + +ARM. Ah! Who can bear that "yes"? Can anyone hear it without feelings +of disgust? + +HEN. What is there in marriage which can oblige you, sister, to.... + +ARM. Ah! Fie! + +HEN. What? + +ARM. Fie! I tell you. Can you not conceive what offence the very +mention of such a word presents to the imagination, and what a +repulsive image it offers to the thoughts? Do you not shudder before +it? And can you bring yourself to accept all the consequences which +this word implies? + +HEN. When I consider all the consequences which this word implies, I +only have offered to my thoughts a husband, children, and a home; and +I see nothing in all this to defile the imagination, or to make one +shudder. + +ARM. O heavens! Can such ties have charms for you? + +HEN. And what at my age can I do better than take a husband who loves +me, and whom I love, and through such a tender union secure the +delights of an innocent life? If there be conformity of tastes, do you +see no attraction in such a bond? + +ARM. Ah! heavens! What a grovelling disposition! What a poor part you +act in the world, to confine yourself to family affairs, and to think +of no more soul-stirring pleasures than those offered by an idol of a +husband and by brats of children! Leave these base pleasures to the +low and vulgar. Raise your thoughts to more exalted objects; endeavour +to cultivate a taste for nobler pursuits; and treating sense and +matter with contempt, give yourself, as we do, wholly to the +cultivation of your mind. You have for an example our mother, who is +everywhere honoured with the name of learned. Try, as we do, to prove +yourself her daughter; aspire to the enlightened intellectuality which +is found in our family, and acquire a taste for the rapturous +pleasures which the love of study brings to the heart and mind. +Instead of being in bondage to the will of a man, marry yourself, +sister, to philosophy, for it alone raises you above the rest of +mankind, gives sovereign empire to reason, and submits to its laws the +animal part, with those grovelling desires which lower us to the level +of the brute. These are the gentle flames, the sweet ties, which +should fill every moment of life. And the cares to which I see so many +women given up, appear to me pitiable frivolities. + +HEN. Heaven, whose will is supreme, forms us at our birth to fill +different spheres; and it is not every mind which is composed of +materials fit to make a philosopher. If your mind is created to soar +to those heights which are attained by the speculations of learned +men, mine is fitted, sister, to take a meaner flight and to centre its +weakness on the petty cares of the world. Let us not interfere with +the just decrees of Heaven; but let each of us follow our different +instincts. You, borne on the wings of a great and noble genius, will +inhabit the lofty regions of philosophy; I, remaining here below, will +taste the terrestrial charms of matrimony. Thus, in our several paths, +we shall still imitate our mother: you, in her mind and its noble +longings; I, in her grosser senses and coarser pleasures; you, in the +productions of genius and light, and I, sister, in productions more +material. + +ARM. When we wish to take a person for a model, it is the nobler side +we should imitate; and it is not taking our mother for a model, +sister, to cough and spit like her. + +HEN. But you would not have been what you boast yourself to be if our +mother had had only her nobler qualities; and well it is for you that +her lofty genius did not always devote itself to philosophy. Pray, +leave me to those littlenesses to which you owe life, and do not, by +wishing me to imitate you, deny some little savant entrance into the +world. + +ARM. I see that you cannot be cured of the foolish infatuation of +taking a husband to yourself. But, pray, let us know whom you intend +to marry; I suppose that you do not aim at Clitandre? + +HEN. And why should I not? Does he lack merit? Is it a low choice I +have made? + +ARM. Certainly not; but it would not be honest to take away the +conquest of another; and it is a fact not unknown to the world that +Clitandre has publicly sighed for me. + +HEN. Yes; but all those sighs are mere vanities for you; you do not +share human weaknesses; your mind has for ever renounced matrimony, +and philosophy has all your love. Thus, having in your heart no +pretensions to Clitandre, what does it matter to you if another has +such pretensions? + +ARM. The empire which reason holds over the senses does not call upon +us to renounce the pleasure of adulation; and we may refuse for a +husband a man of merit whom we would willingly see swell the number of +our admirers. + +HEN. I have not prevented him from continuing his worship, but have +only received the homage of his passion when you had rejected it. + +ARM. But do you find entire safety, tell me, in the vows of a rejected +lover? Do you think his passion for you so great that all love for me +can be dead in his heart? + +HEN. He tells me so, sister, and I trust him. + +ARM. Do not, sister, be so ready to trust him; and be sure that, when +he says he gives me up and loves you, he really does not mean it, but +deceives himself. + +HEN. I cannot say; but if you wish it, it will be easy for us to +discover the true state of things. I see him coming, and on this point +he will be sure to give us full information. + + + + +SCENE II.--CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Clitandre, deliver me from a doubt my sister has raised in me. +Pray open your heart to us; tell us the truth, and let us know which +of us has a claim upon your love. + +ARM. No, no; I will not force upon your love the hardship of an +explanation. I have too much respect for others, and know how +perplexing it is to make an open avowal before witnesses. + +CLI. No; my heart cannot dissemble, and it is no hardship to me to +speak openly. Such a step in no way perplexes me, and I acknowledge +before all, freely and openly, that the tender chains which bind me +(_pointing to_ HENRIETTE), my homage and my love, are all on this +side. Such a confession can cause you no surprise, for you wished +things to be thus. I was touched by your attractions, and my tender +sighs told you enough of my ardent desires; my heart offered you an +immortal love, but you did not think the conquest which your eyes had +made noble enough. I have suffered many slights, for you reigned over +my heart like a tyrant; but weary at last with so much pain, I looked +elsewhere for a conqueror more gentle, and for chains less cruel. +(_Pointing to_ HENRIETTE) I have met with them here, and my bonds +will forever be precious to me. These eyes have looked upon me with +compassion, and have dried my tears. They have not despised what you +had refused. Such kindness has captivated me, and there is nothing +which would now break my chains. Therefore I beseech you, Madam, never +to make an attempt to regain a heart which has resolved to die in this +gentle bondage. + +ARM. Bless me, Sir, who told you that I had such a desire, and, in +short, that I cared so much for you? I think it tolerably ridiculous +that you should imagine such a thing, and very impertinent in you to +declare it to me. + +HEN. Ah! gently, sister. Where is now that moral sense which has so +much power over that which is merely animal in us, and which can +restrain the madness of anger? + +ARM. And you, who speak to me, what moral sense have you when you +respond to a love which is offered to you before you have received +leave from those who have given you birth? Know that duty subjects you +to their laws, and that you may love only in accordance with their +choice; for they have a supreme authority over your heart, and it is +criminal in you to dispose of it yourself. + +HEN. I thank you for the great kindness you show me in teaching me my +duty. My heart intends to follow the line of conduct you have traced; +and to show you that I profit by your advice, pray, Clitandre, see +that your love is strengthened by the consent of those from whom I +have received birth. Acquire thus a right over my wishes, and for me +the power of loving you without a crime. + +CLI. I will do so with all diligence. I only waited for this kind +permission from you. + +ARM. You triumph, sister, and seem to fancy that you thereby give me +pain. + +HEN. I, sister? By no means. I know that the laws of reason will +always have full power over your senses, and that, through the lessons +you derive from wisdom, you are altogether above such weakness. Far +from thinking you moved by any vexation, I believe that you will use +your influence to help me, will second his demand of my hand, and will +by your approbation hasten the happy day of our marriage. I beseech +you to do so; and in order to secure this end.... + +ARM. Your little mind thinks it grand to resort to raillery, and you +seem wonderfully proud of a heart which I abandon to you. + +HEN. Abandoned it may be; yet this heart, sister, is not so disliked +by you but that, if you could regain it by stooping, you would even +condescend to do so. + +ARM. I scorn to answer such foolish prating. + +HEN. You do well; and you show us inconceivable moderation. + + + + +SCENE III.--CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +HEN. Your frank confession has rather taken her aback. + +CLI. She deserves such freedom of speech, and all the haughtiness of +her proud folly merits my outspokenness! But since you give me leave, +I will go to your father, to.... + +HEN. The safest thing to do would be to gain my mother over. My father +easily consents to everything, but he places little weight on what he +himself resolves. He has received from Heaven a certain gentleness +which makes him readily submit to the will of his wife. It is she who +governs, and who in a dictatorial tone lays down the law whenever she +has made up her mind to anything. I wish I could see in you a more +pliant spirit towards her and towards my aunt. If you would but fall +in with their views, you would secure their favour and their esteem. + +CLI. I am so sincere that I can never bring myself to praise, even in +your sister, that side of her character which resembles theirs. Female +doctors are not to my taste. I like a woman to have some knowledge of +everything; but I cannot admire in her the revolting passion of +wishing to be clever for the mere sake of being clever. I prefer that +she should, at times, affect ignorance of what she really knows. In +short, I like her to hide her knowledge, and to be learned without +publishing her learning abroad, quoting the authors, making use of +pompous words, and being witty under the least provocation. I greatly +respect your mother, but I cannot approve her wild fancies, nor make +myself an echo of what she says. I cannot support the praises she +bestows upon that literary hero of hers, Mr. Trissotin, who vexes and +wearies me to death. I cannot bear to see her have any esteem for such +a man, and to see her reckon among men of genius a fool whose writings +are everywhere hissed; a pedant whose liberal pen furnishes all the +markets with wastepaper. + +HEN. His writings, his speeches, in short, everything in him is +unpleasant to me; and I feel towards him as you do. But as he +possesses great ascendancy over my mother, you must force yourself to +yield somewhat. A lover should make his court where his heart is +engaged; he should win the favour of everyone; and in order to have +nobody opposed to his love, try to please even the dog of the house. + +CLI. Yes, you are right; but Mr. Trissotin is hateful to me. I cannot +consent, in order to win his favour, to dishonour myself by praising +his works. It is through them that he was first brought to my notice, +and I knew him before I had seen him. I saw in the trash which he +writes all that his pedantic person everywhere shows forth; the +persistent haughtiness of his presumption, the intrepidity of the good +opinion he has of his person, the calm overweening confidence which at +all times makes him so satisfied with himself, and with the writings +of which he boasts; so that he would not exchange his renown for all +the honours of the greatest general. + +HEN. You have good eyes to see all that. + +CLI. I even guessed what he was like; and by means of the verses with +which he deluges us, I saw what the poet must be. So well had I +pictured to myself all his features and gait that one day, meeting a +man in the galleries of the Palace of Justice [footnote: the resort of +the best company in those days.], I laid a wager that it must be +Trissotin--and I won my wager. + +HEN. What a tale! + +CLI. No, I assure you that it is the perfect truth. But I see your +aunt coming; allow me, I pray you, to tell her of the longings of my +heart, and to gain her kind help with your mother. + + + + +SCENE IV.--BÉLISE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. Suffer a lover, Madam, to profit by such a propitious moment to +reveal to you his sincere devotion.... + +BEL. Ah! gently! Beware of opening your heart too freely to me; +although I have placed you in the list of my lovers, you must use no +interpreter but your eyes, and never explain by another language +desires which are an insult to me. Love me; sigh for me; burn for my +charms; but let me know nothing of it. I can shut my eyes to your +secret flame, as long as you keep yourself to dumb interpreters; but +if your mouth meddle in the matter, I must for ever banish you from my +sight. + +CLI. Do not be alarmed at the intentions of my heart. Henriette is, +Madam, the object of my love, and I come ardently to conjure you to +favour the love I have for her. + +BEL. Ah! truly now, the subterfuge shows excellent wit. This subtle +evasion deserves praise; and in all the romances I have glanced over, +I have never met with anything more ingenious. + +CLI. This is no attempt at wit, Madam; it is the avowal of what my +heart feels. Heaven has bound me to the beauty of Henriette by the +ties of an unchangeable love. Henriette holds me in her lovely chains; +and to marry Henriette is the end of all my hopes. You can do much +towards it; and what I have come to ask you is that you will +condescend to second my addresses. + +BEL. I see the end to which your demand would gently head, and I +understand whom you mean under that name. The metaphor is clever; and +not to depart from it, let me tell you that Henriette rebels against +matrimony, and that you must love her without any hope of having your +love returned. + +CLI. But, Madam, what is the use of such a perplexing debate? Why will +you persist in believing what is not? + +BEL. Dear me! Do not trouble yourself so much. Leave off denying what +your looks have often made me understand. Let it suffice that I am +content with the subterfuge your love has so skilfully adopted, and +that under the figure to which respect has limited it, I am willing to +suffer its homage; always provided that its transports, guided by +honour, offer only pure vows on my altars. + +CLI. But.... + +BEL. Farewell. This ought really to satisfy you, and I have said more +than I wished to say. + +CLI. But your error.... + +BEL. Leave me. I am blushing now; and my modesty has had much to bear. + +CLI. May I be hanged if I love you; and.... [Footnote: Molière ends +this line with _sage_, with, apparently, no other motive than to +find a rhyme to _davantage._] + +BEL. No, no. I will hear nothing more. + + + + +SCENE V. CLITANDRE (_alone_) + +Deuce take the foolish woman with her dreams! Was anything so +preposterous ever heard of? I must go and ask the help of a person of +more sense. + + + +ACT II. + +SCENE I.--ARISTE (_leaving_ CLITANDRE, _and still speaking to +him_). + + +Yes; I will bring you an answer as soon as I can. I will press, +insist, do all that should be done. How many things a lover has to say +when one would suffice; and how impatient he is for all that he +desires! Never.... + + + + +SCENE II; CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +ARI. Good day to you, brother. + +CHRY. And to you also, brother. + +ARI. Do you know what brings me here? + +CHRY. No, I do not; but I am ready to hear it, if it pleases you to +tell me. + +ARI. You have known Clitandre for some time now? + +CHRY. Certainly; and he often comes to our house. + +ARI. And what do you think of him? + +CHRY. I think him to be a man of honour, wit, courage, and +uprightness, and I know very few people who have more merit. + +ARI. A certain wish of his has brought me here; and I am glad to see +the esteem you have for him. + +CHRY. I became acquainted with his late father when I was in Rome. + +ARI. Ah! + +CHRY. He was a perfect gentleman. + +ARI. So it is said. + +CHRY. We were only about twenty-eight years of age, and, upon my word, +we were, both of us, very gay young fellows. + +ARI. I believe it. + +CHRY. We greatly affected the Roman ladies, and everybody there spoke +of our pranks. We made many people jealous, I can tell you. + +ARI. Excellent; but let us come to what brings me here. + + + + +SCENE III.--BÉLISE (_entering softly and listening_), CHRYSALE, +ARISTE. + +ARI. Clitandre has chosen me to be his interpreter to you; he has +fallen in love with Henriette. + +CHRY. What! with my daughter? + +ARI. Yes. Clitandre is delighted with her, and you never saw a lover +so smitten! + +BEL. (_to_ ARISTE). No, no; you are mistaken. You do not know the +story, and the thing is not as you imagine. + +ARI. How so, sister? + +BEL. Clitandre deceives you; it is with another that he is in love. + +ARI. It is not with Henriette that he is in love? You are joking. + +BEL. No; I am telling the perfect truth. + +ARI. He told me so himself. + +BEL. Doubtless. + +ARI. You see me here, sister, commissioned by him to ask her of her +father. + +BEL. Yes, I know. + +ARI. And he besought me, in the name of his love, to hasten the time +of an alliance so desired by him. + +BEL. Better and better. No more gallant subterfuge could have been +employed. But let me tell you that Henriette is an excuse, an +ingenious veil, a pretext, brother, to cover another flame, the +mystery of which I know; and most willingly will I enlighten you both. + +ARI. Since you know so much, sister, pray tell us whom he loves. + +BEL. You wish to know? + +ARI. Yes; who is it? BEL. Me! + +ARI. You! + +BEL. Myself. + +ARI. Come, I say! sister! + +BEL. What do you mean by this "Come, I say"? And what is there so +wonderful in what I tell you? I am handsome enough, I should think, to +have more than one heart in subjection to my empire; and Dorante, +Damis, Cléonte, and Lycidas show well enough the power of my charms. + +ARI. Do those men love you? + +BEL. Yes; with all their might. + +ARI. They have told you so? + +BEL. No one would take such a liberty; they have, up to the present +time, respected me so much that they have never spoken to me of their +love. But the dumb interpreters have done their office in offering +their hearts and lives to me. + +ARI. I hardly ever see Damis here. + +BEL. It is to show me a more respectful submission. + +ARI. Dorante, with sharp words, abuses you everywhere. + +BEL. It is the transport of a jealous passion. + +ARI. Cléonte and Lycidas are both married. + +BEL. It was the despair to which I had reduced their love. + +ARI. Upon my word, sister, these are mere visions. + +CHRY. (to BÉLISE). You had better get rid of these idle fancies. + +BEL. Ah! idle fancies! They are idle fancies, you think. I have idle +fancies! Really, "idle fancies" is excellent. I greatly rejoice at +those idle fancies, brothers, and I did not know that I was addicted +to idle fancies. + + + + +SCENE IV.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE. + +CHRY. Our sister is decidedly crazy. + +ARI. It grows upon her every day. But let us resume the subject that +brings me here. Clitandre asks you to give him Henriette in marriage. +Tell me what answer we can make to his love. + +CHRY. Do you ask it? I consent to it with all my heart; and I consider +his alliance a great honour. + +ARI. You know that he is not wealthy, that.... + +CHRY. That is a thing of no consequence. He is rich in virtue, and +that is better than wealth. Moreover, his father and I were but one +mind in two bodies. + +ARI. Let us speak to your wife, and try to render her favourable +to.... + +CHRY. It is enough. I accept him for my son-in-law. + +ARI. Yes; but to support your consent, it will not be amiss to have +her agree to it also. Let us go.... + +CHRY. You are joking? There is no need of this. I answer for my wife, +and take the business upon myself. + +ARI. But.... + +CHRY. Leave it to me, I say, and fear nothing. I will go, and prepare +her this moment. + +ARI. Let it be so. I will go and see Henriette on the subject, and +will return to know.... + +CHRY. It is a settled thing, and I will go without delay and talk to +my wife about it. + + + + +SCENE V.-CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +MAR. Just like my luck! Alas! they be true sayings, they be--"Give a +dog a bad name and hang him," and--"One doesn't get fat in other +folk's service." [Footnote: Or, more literally, "Service is no +inheritance;" but this does not sound familiar enough in English.] + +CHRY. What is it? What is the matter with you, Martine? + +MAR. What is the matter? + +CHRY. Yes. + +MAR. The matter is that I am sent away, Sir. + +CHRY. Sent away? + +MAR. Yes; mistress has turned me out. + +CHRY. I don't understand; why has she? + +MAR. I am threatened with a sound beating if I don't go. + +CHRY. No; you will stop here. I am quite satisfied with you. My wife +is a little hasty at times, and I will not, no.... + + + + +SCENE VI.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, CHRYSALE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_seeing_ MARTINE). What! I see you here, you hussy! Quick, +leave this place, and never let me set my eyes upon you again. + +CHRY. Gently. + +PHI. No; I will have it so. + +CHRY. What? + +PHI. I insist upon her going. + +CHRY. But what has she done wrong, that you wish her in this way +to...? + +PHI. What! you take her part? + +CHRY. Certainly not. + +PHI. You side with her against me? + +CHRY. Oh! dear me, no; I only ask what she is guilty of. + +PHI. Am I one to send her away without just cause? + +CHRY. I do not say that; but we must, with servants.... + +PHI. No; she must leave this place, I tell you. + +CHRY. Let it be so; who says anything to the contrary? + +PHI. I will have no opposition to my will. + +CHRY. Agreed. + +PHI. And like a reasonable husband, you should take my part against +her, and share my anger. + +CHRY. So I do. (_Turning towards_ MARTINE.) Yes; my wife is right +in sending you away, baggage that you are; your crime cannot be +forgiven. + +MAR. What is it I have done, then? + +CHRY. (_aside_). Upon my word, I don't know. + +PHI. She is capable even now of looking upon it as nothing. + +CHRY. Has she caused your anger by breaking some looking-glass or some +china? + +PHI. Do you think that I would send her away for that? And do you +fancy that I should get angry for so little? + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). What is the meaning of this? (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) The thing is of great importance, then? + +PHI. Certainly; did you ever find me unreasonable? + +CHRY. Has she, through carelessness, allowed some ewer or silver dish +to be stolen from us? + +PHI. That would be of little moment. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). Oh! oh! I say, Miss! (_To_ PHILAMINTE) +What! has she shown herself dishonest? + +PHI. It is worse than that. + +CHRY. Worse than that? + +PHI. Worse. + +CHRY. (_to_ MARTINE). How the deuce! you jade. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) What! has she...? + +PHI. She has with unparalleled impudence, after thirty lessons, +insulted my ear by the improper use of a low and vulgar word condemned +in express terms by Vaugelas. [Footnote: The French grammarian, born +about 1585; died 1650.] + +CHRY. Is that...? + +PHI. What! In spite of our remonstrances to be always sapping the +foundation of all knowledge--of grammar which rules even kings, and +makes them, with a high hand, obey her laws. + +CHRY. I thought her guilty of the greatest crime. + +PHI. What! You do not think the crime unpardonable? + +CHRY. Yes, yes. + +PHI. I should like to see you excuse her. + +CHRY. Heaven forbid! + +BEL. It is really pitiful. All constructions are destroyed by her; yet +she has a hundred times been told the laws of the language. + +MAR. All that you preach there is no doubt very fine, but I don't +understand your jargon, not I. + +PHI. Did you ever see such impudence? To call a language founded on +reason and polite custom a jargon! + +MAR. Provided one is understood, one speaks well enough, and all your +fine speeches don't do me no good. + +PHI. You see! Is not that her way of speaking, _don't do me no +good!_ + +BEL. O intractable brains! How is it that, in spite of the trouble we +daily take, we cannot teach you to speak with congruity? In putting +_not_ with _no_, you have spoken redundantly, and it is, as +you have been told, a negative too many. + +MAR. Oh my! I ain't no scholar like you, and I speak straight out as +they speaks in our place. + +PHI. Ah! who can bear it? + +BEL. What a horrible solecism! + +PHI. It is enough to destroy a delicate ear. + +BEL. You are, I must acknowledge, very dull of understanding; +_they_ is in the plural number, and _speaks_ is in the singular. +Will you thus all your life offend grammar? [Footnote: _Grammaire_ in +Molière's time was pronounced as _grand'mère_ is now. _Gammer_ +seems the nearest approach to this in English.] + +MAR. Who speaks of offending either gammer or gaffer? + +PHI. O heavens! + +BEL. The word _grammar_ is misunderstood by you, and I have told +you a hundred times where the word comes from. + +MAR. Faith, let it come from Chaillot, Auteuil, or Pontoise, +[Footnote: In Molière's time villages close to Paris.] I care precious +little. + +BEL. What a boorish mind! _Grammar_ teaches us the laws of the +verb and nominative case, as well as of the adjective and substantive. + +MAR. Sure, let me tell you, Ma'am, that I don't know those people. + +PHI. What martyrdom! + +BEL. They are names of words, and you ought to notice how they agree +with each other. + +MAR. What does it matter whether they agree or fall out? + +PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Goodness gracious! put an end to such a +discussion. (_To_ CHRYSALE) And so you will not send her away? + +CHRY. Oh! yes. (_Aside_) I must put up with her caprice, Go, +don't provoke her, Martine. + +PHI. How! you are afraid of offending the hussy! you speak to her in +quite an obliging tone. + +CHRY. I? Not at all. (_In a rough tone_) Go, leave this place. +(_In a softer tone_) Go away, my poor girl. + + + + +SCENE VII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE, BÉLISE. + +CHRY. She is gone, and you are satisfied, but I do not approve of +sending her away in this fashion. She answers very well for what she +has to do, and you turn her out of my house for a trifle. + +PHI. Do you wish me to keep her for ever in my service, for her to +torture my ears incessantly, to infringe all the laws of custom and +reason, by a barbarous accumulation of errors of speech, and of +garbled expressions tacked together with proverbs dragged out of the +gutters of all the market-places? + +BEL. It is true that one sickens at hearing her talk; she pulls +Vaugelas to pieces, and the least defects of her gross intellect are +either pleonasm or cacophony. + +CHRY. What does it matter if she fails to observe the laws of +Vaugelas, provided she does not fail in her cooking? I had much rather +that while picking her herbs, she should join wrongly the nouns to the +verbs, and repeat a hundred times a coarse or vulgar word, than that +she should burn my roast, or put too much salt in my broth. I live on +good soup, and not on fine language. Vaugelas does not teach how to +make broth; and Malherbe and Balzac, so clever in learned words, +might, in cooking, have proved themselves but fools. [Footnote: +Malherbe, 1555-1628; Balzac, 1594-1654.] + +PHI. How shocking such a coarse speech sounds; and how unworthy of one +who calls himself a man, to be always bent on material things, instead +of rising towards those which are intellectual. Is that dross, the +body, of importance enough to deserve even a passing thought? and +ought we not to leave it far behind? + +CHRY. Well, my body is myself, and I mean to take care of it; +_dross_ if you like, but my dross is dear to me. + +BEL. The body and the mind, brother, exist together; but if you +believe all the learned world, the mind ought to take precedence over +the body, and our first care, our most earnest endeavour, must be to +feed it with the juices of science. + +CHRY. Upon my word, if you talk of feeding your mind, you make use of +but poor diet, as everybody knows; and you have no care, no solicitude +for.... + +PHI. Ah! _Solicitude_ is unpleasant to my ear: it betrays +strangely its antiquity. [Footnote: Many of the words condemned by the +purists of the time have died out; _solicitude_ still remains.] + +BEL. It is true that it is dreadfully starched and out of fashion. + +CHRY. I can bear this no longer. You will have me speak out, then? I +will raise the mask, and discharge my spleen. Every one calls you mad, +and I am greatly troubled at.... + +PHI. Ah! what is the meaning of this? + +CHRY. (_to_ BÉLISE). I am speaking to you, sister. The least +solecism one makes in speaking irritates you; but you make strange +ones in conduct. Your everlasting books do not satisfy me, and, except +a big Plutarch to put my bands in [Footnote: To keep them flat.], you +should burn all this useless lumber, and leave learning to the doctors +of the town. Take away from the garret that long telescope, which is +enough to frighten people, and a hundred other baubles which are +offensive to the sight. Do not try to discover what is passing in the +moon, and think a little more of what is happening at home, where we +see everything going topsy-turvy. It is not right, and that too for +many reasons, that a woman should study and know so much. To form the +minds of her children to good manners, to make her household go well, +to look after the servants, and regulate all expenses with economy, +ought to be her principal study, and all her philosophy. Our fathers +were much more sensible on this point: with them, a wife always knew +enough when the extent of her genius enabled her to distinguish a +doublet from a pair of breeches. She did not read, but she lived +honestly; her family was the subject of all her learned conversation, +and for hooks she had needles, thread, and a thimble, with which she +worked at her daughter's trousseau. Women, in our days, are far from +behaving thus: they must write and become authors. No science is too +deep for them. It is worse in my house than anywhere else; the deepest +secrets are understood, and everything is known except what should be +known. Everyone knows how go the moon and the polar star, Venus, +Saturn, and Mars, with which I have nothing to do. And in this vain +knowledge, which they go so far to fetch, they know nothing of the +soup of which I stand in need. My servants all wish to be learned, in +order to please you; and all alike occupy themselves with anything but +the work they have to do. Reasoning is the occupation of the whole +house, and reasoning banishes all reason. One burns my roast while +reading some story; another dreams of verses when I call for drink. In +short, they all follow your example, and although I have servants, I +am not served. One poor girl alone was left me, untouched by this +villainous fashion; and now, behold, she is sent away with a huge +clatter because she fails to speak Vaugelas. I tell you, sister, all +this offends me, for as I have already said, it is to you I am +speaking. I dislike to see all those Latin-mongers in my house, and +particularly Mr. Trissotin. It is he who has turned your heads with +his verses. All his talk is mere rubbish, and one is for ever trying +to find out what he has said after he has done speaking. For my part I +believe that he is rather cracked. + +PHI. What coarseness, O heavens! both in thought and language. + +BEL. Can there be a more gross assemblage of corpuscles, [Footnote: A +reference to the corpuscular philosophy] a mind composed of more +vulgar atoms? Is it possible that I can come from the same blood? I +hate myself for being of your race, and out of pure shame I abandon +the spot. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--PHILAMINTE, CHRYSALE. + +PHI. Have you any other shaft ready? + +CHRY. I? No. Don't let us dispute any longer. I've done. Let's speak +of something else. Your eldest daughter shows a dislike to marriage; +in short, she is a philosopher, and I've nothing to say. She is under +good management, and you do well by her. But her younger sister is of +a different disposition, and I think it would be right to give +Henriette a proper husband, who.... + +PHI. It is what I have been thinking about, and I wish to speak to you +of what I intend to do. This Mr. Trissotin on whose account we are +blamed, and who has not the honour of being esteemed by you; is the +man whom I have chosen to be her husband; and I can judge of his merit +better than you can. All discussion is superfluous here, for I have +duly resolved that it should be so. I will ask you also not to say a +word of it to your daughter before I have spoken to her on the +subject. I can justify my conduct, and I shall be sure to know if you +have spoken to her. + + + + +SCENE IX.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE. + +ARI. Well! your wife has just left, and I see that you must have had a +talk together. + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. And how did you succeed? Shall we have Henriette? Has she given +her consent? Is the affair settled? + +CHRY. Not quite as yet. + +ARI. Does she refuse? + +CHRY. No. + +ARI. Then she hesitates? + +CHRY. Not in the least. + +ARI. What then? + +CHRY. Well! she offers me another man for a son-in-law. + +ARI. Another man for a son-in-law? + +CHRY. Yes. + +ARI. What is his name? + +CHRY. Mr. Trissotin. + +ARI. What! that Mr. Trissotin.... + +CHRY. Yes, he who always speaks of verse and Latin. + +ARI. And you have accepted him? + +CHRY. I? Heaven forbid! + +ARI. What did you say to it? + +CHRY. Nothing. I am glad that I did not speak, and commit myself. + +ARI. Your reason is excellent, and it is a great step towards the end +we have in view. Did you not propose Clitandre to her? + +CHRY. No; for as she talked of another son-in-law, I thought it was +better for me to say nothing. + +ARI. Your prudence is to the last degree wonderful! Are you not +ashamed of your weakness? How can a man be so poor-spirited as to let +his wife have absolute power over him, and never dare to oppose +anything she has resolved upon? + +CHRY. Ah! it is easy, brother, for you to speak; you don't know what a +dislike I have to a row, and how I love rest and peace. My wife has a +terrible disposition. She makes a great show of the name of +philosopher, but she is not the less passionate on that account; and +her philosophy, which makes her despise all riches, has no power over +the bitterness of her anger. However little I oppose what she has +taken into her head, I raise a terrible storm which lasts at least a +week. She makes me tremble when she begins her outcries; I don't know +where to hide myself. She is a perfect virago; and yet, in spite of +her diabolical temper, I must call her my darling and my love. + +ARI. You are talking nonsense. Between ourselves, your wife has +absolute power over you only because of your own cowardice. Her +authority is founded upon your own weakness; it is from you she takes +the name of mistress. You give way to her haughty manners, and suffer +yourself to be led by the nose like a fool. What! you call yourself a +man, and cannot for once make your wife obey you, and have courage +enough to say, "I will have it so?" You will, without shame, see your +daughter sacrificed to the mad visions with which the family is +possessed? You will confer your wealth on a man because of half-a-dozen +Latin words with which the ass talks big before them--a pedant whom +your wife compliments at every turn with the names of wit and great +philosopher whose verses were never equalled, whereas everybody +knows that he is anything but all that. Once more I tell you, it is a +shame, and you deserve that people should laugh at your cowardice. + +CHRY. Yes, you are right, and I see that I am wrong. I must pluck up a +little more courage, brother. + +ARI. That's right. + +CHRY. It is shameful to be so submissive under the tyranny of a woman. + +ARI. Good. + +CHRY. She has abused my gentleness. + +ARI. It is true. + +CHRY. My easy-going ways have lasted too long. + +ARI. Certainly. + +CHRY. And to-day I will let her know that my daughter is my daughter, +and that I am the master, to choose a husband for her according to my +mind. + +ARI. You are reasonable now, and as you should be. + +CHRY. You are for Clitandre, and you know where he lives; send him to +me directly, brother. + +ARI. I will go at once. + +CHRY. I have borne it too long. I will be a man, and set everybody at +defiance. + + + + +ACT III. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE. + + +PHI. Ah! Let us sit down here to listen comfortably to these verses; +they should be weighed word by word. + +ARM. I am all anxiety to hear them. + +BEL. And I am dying for them. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Whatever comes from you is a delight to +me. + +ARM. It is to me an unparalleled pleasure. + +BEL. It is a delicious repast offered to my ears. + +PHI. Do not let us languish under such pressing desires. + +ARM. Lose no time. + +BEL. Begin quickly and hasten our pleasure. + +PHI. Offer your epigram to our impatience. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Alas! it is but a new-born child, Madam, +but its fate ought truly to touch your heart, for it was in your +court-yard that I brought it forth, but a moment since. + +PHI. To make it dear to me, it is sufficient for me to know its +father. + +TRI. Your approbation may serve it as a mother. + +BEL. What wit he has! + + + + +SCENE II.--HENRIETTE, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE. + +PHI. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _who is going away_). Stop! why do you +run away? + +HEN. I fear to disturb such sweet intercourse. + +PHI. Come nearer, and with both ears share in the delight of hearing +wonders. + +HEN. I have little understanding for the beauties of authorship, and +witty things are not in my line. + +PHI. No matter. Besides, I wish afterwards to tell you of a secret +which you must learn. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Knowledge has nothing that can touch you, +and your only care is to charm everybody. + +HEN. One as little as the other, and I have no wish.... + +BEL. Ah! let us think of the new-born babe, I beg of you. + +PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE). Now, little page, bring some seats for us to +sit down. (LÉPINE _slips down_.) You senseless boy, how can you +fall down after having learnt the laws of equilibrium? + +BEL. Do you not perceive, ignorant fellow, the causes of your fall, +and that it proceeds from your having deviated from the fixed point +which we call the centre of gravity? + +LEP. I perceived it, Madam, when I was on the ground. + +PHI. (_to_ LÉPINE, _who goes out_). The awkward clown! + +TRI. It is fortunate for him that he is not made of glass. + +ARM. Ah! wit is everything! + +BEL. It never ceases. (_They sit down._) + +PHI. Serve us quickly your admirable feast. + +TRI. To satisfy, the great hunger which is here shown to me, a dish of +eight verses seems but little; and I think that I should do well to +join to the epigram, or rather to the madrigal, the ragout of a sonnet +which, in the eyes of a princess, was thought to have a certain +delicacy in it. It is throughout seasoned with Attic salt, and I think +you will find the taste of it tolerably good. + +ARM. Ah! I have no doubt of it. + +PHI. Let us quickly give audience. + +BEL. (_interrupting_ TRISSOTIN _each time he is about to +read_). I feel, beforehand, my heart beating for joy. I love poetry +to distraction, particularly when the verses are gallantly turned. + +PHI. If we go on speaking he will never be able to read. + +TRI. SONN.... + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Be silent, my niece. + +ARM. Ah! let him read, I beg. + +TRI. SONNET TO THE PRINCESS URANIA ON HER FEVER.[1] + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes--_ + +[1] +[The sonnet is not of Molière's invention, but is to be found in +_Les Oeuvres galantes en prose et en vers de M. Cotin_, Paris, +1663. It is called, _Sonnet à Mademoiselle de Longueville, à présent +Duchesse de Nemours, sur sa fièvre quarte_. As, of necessity, the +translation given above is not very literal, I append the original. + + "Votre prudence est endormie, + De traiter magnifiquement, + Et de loger superbement, + Votre plus cruelle ennemie; + + Faites-la sortir quoi qu'on die, + De votre riche appartement, + Où cette ingrate insolemment + Attaque votre belle vie! + + Quoi! sans respecter votre rang, + Elle se prend à votre sang, + Et nuit et jour vous fait outrage! + + Si vous la conduisez aux bains, + Sans la marchander davantage, + Noyez-la de vos propres mains." + +The _die_ of _quoi qu'on die_ was the regular form in +Molière's time, and had nothing archaic about it. This is sufficiently +true of "Will she, nill she" (compare Shakespeare's "And, will you, +nill you, I will marry you") to excuse its use here.] + +BEL. Ah! what a pretty beginning! + +ARM. What a charming turn it has! + +PHI. He alone possesses the talent of making easy verses. + +ARM. We must yield to _prudence fast in sleep's repose is +plunged_. + +BEL. A _lodging for the most cruel of your foes_ is full of +charms for me. + +PHI. I like _superbly_ and _gorgeously_; these two adverbs +joined together sound admirably. + +BEL. Let us hear the rest. + +TRI. + _Your prudence fast in sleep's repose + Is plunged; if thus superbly kind, + A lodging gorgeously you can find + For the most cruel of your foes_ + +ARM. _Prudence asleep_! + +BEL. _Lodge one's enemy_! + +PHI. _Superbly and gorgeously_! + +TRI. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes! + From your apartment richly lined, + Where that ingrate's outrageous mind + At your fair life her javelin throws_. + +BEL. Ah! gently. Allow me to breathe, I beseech you. + +ARM. Give us time to admire, I beg. + +PHI. One feels, at hearing these verses, an indescribable something +which goes through one's inmost soul, and makes one feel quite faint. + +ARM. + _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes + From your apartment richly lined_. +How prettily _rich apartment_ is said here, and with what wit the +metaphor is introduced! + +PHI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ Ah! in what +admirable taste that _will she, nill she_, is! To my mind the +passage is invaluable. + +ARM. My heart is also in love with _will she, nill she_. + +BEL. I am of your opinion; _will she, nill she_, is a happy +expression. + +ARM. I wish I had written it. + +BEL. It is worth a whole poem! + +PHI. But do you, like me, understand thoroughly the wit of it? + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Oh! oh + +PHIL. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes_! Although another +should take the fever's part, pay no attention; laugh at the gossips; +_will she, nill she, quick, out she goes. Will she, nill she, will +she, nill she_. This _will she, nill she_, says a great deal +more than it seems. I do not know if every one is like me, but I +discover in it a hundred meanings. + +BEL. It is true that it says more than its size seems to imply. + +PHI. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). But when you wrote this charming _Will +she, nill she_, did you yourself understand all its energy? Did you +realise all that it tells us, and did you then think that you were +writing something so witty? + +TRI. Ah! ah! + +ARM. I have likewise the _ingrate_ in my head; this ungrateful, +unjust, uncivil fever that ill-treats people who entertain her. + +PHI. In short, both the stanzas are admirable. Let us come quickly to +the triplets, I pray. + +ARM. Ah! once more, _will she, nill she_, I beg. + +TRI. _Will she, nill she, quick, out she goes!_ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Will she, nill she!_ + +TRI. _From your apartment richly lined._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. _Rich apartment!_ + +TRI. _Where that ingrate's outrageous mind._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. That ungrateful fever! + +TRI. _At your fair life her javelin throws._ + +PHI. _Fair life!_ + +ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _What! without heed for your high line, + She saps your blood with care malign..._ + +PHI., ARM. _and_ BEL. Ah! + +TRI. + _Redoubling outrage night and day! + If to the bath you take her down, + Without a moment's haggling, pray, + With your own hands the miscreant drown._ + +PHI. Ah! it is quite overpowering. + +BEL. I faint. + +ARM. I die from pleasure. + +PHI. A thousand sweet thrills seize one. + +ARM. _If to the bath you take her down,_ + +BEL. _Without a moment's haggling, pray,_ + +PHI. _With your own hands the miscreant drown_. With your own +hands, there, drown her there in the bath. + +ARM. In your verses we meet at each step with charming beauty. + +BEL. One promenades through them with rapture. + +PHI. One treads on fine things only. + +ARM. They are little lanes all strewn with roses. + +TRI. Then the sonnet seems to you.... + +PHI. Admirable, new; and never did any one make anything more +beautiful. + +BEL. (_to_ HENRIETTE). What! my niece, you listen to what has +been read without emotion! You play there but a sorry part! + +HEN. We each of us play the best part we can, my aunt, and to be a wit +does not depend on our will. + +TRI. My verses, perhaps, are tedious to you. + +HEN. No. I do not listen. + +PHI. Ah! let us hear the epigram. + +TRI. ON A CARRIAGE OF THE COLOUR OF AMARANTH GIVEN TO ONE OF HIS LADY +FRIENDS. [2] + +PHI. His titles have always something rare in them. + +ARM. They prepare one for a hundred flashes of wit. + +TRI. + _Love for his bonds so dear a price demands, + E'en now it costs me more than half my lands, + And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Laïs rides in triumph through the land..._ + +[2] +[This epigram is also by Cotin. It is called, _'Madrigal sur un +carosse de couleur amarante, acheté pour une dame.'_ + +"L'amour si chèrement m'a vendu son lien +Qu'il me coûte déjà la moitié de mon bien, +Et quand tu vois ce beau carrosse, +Où tant d'or se relève en bosse, +Qu'il étonne tout le pays, +Et fait pompeusement triompher ma Laïs, +Ne dis plus qu'il est amarante, +Dis plutôt qu'il est de ma rente."] + +PHI. Ah! Laïs! what erudition! + +BEL. The cover is pretty, and worth a million. + +TRI. + _And when this chariot meets your eyes, + Where so much gold emboss'd doth rise + That people all astonished stand, + And Laïs rides in triumph through the land, + Say no more it is amaranth, + Say rather it is o' my rent._ + +ARM. Oh, oh, oh! this is beyond everything; who would have expected +that? + +PHI. He is the only one to write in such taste. + +BEL. Say no more it is _amaranth, say rather it is o' my rent_! +It can be declined; _my rent; of my rent; to my rent; from my +rent_. + +PHI. I do not know whether I was prepossessed from the first moment I +saw you, but I admire all your prose and verse whenever I see it. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). If you would only show us something of +your composition, we could admire in our turn. + +PHI. I have done nothing in verse; but I have reason to hope that I +shall, shortly, be able, as a friend, to show you eight chapters of +the plan of our Academy. Plato only touched on the subject when he +wrote the treatise of his Republic; but I will complete the idea as I +have arranged it on paper in prose. For, in short, I am truly angry at +the wrong which is done us in regard to intelligence; and I will +avenge the whole sex for the unworthy place which men assign us by +confining our talents to trifles, and by shutting the door of sublime +knowledge against us. + +ARM. It is insulting our sex too grossly to limit our intelligence to +the power of judging of a skirt, of the make of a garment, of the +beauties of lace, or of a new brocade. + +BEL. We must rise above this shameful condition, and bravely proclaim +our emancipation. + +TRI. Every one knows my respect for the fairer sex, and that if I +render homage to the brightness of their eyes, I also honour the +splendour of their intellect. PHI. And our sex does you justice in +this respect: but we will show to certain minds who treat us with +proud contempt that women also have knowledge; that, like men, they +can hold learned meetings--regulated, too, by better rules; that they +wish to unite what elsewhere is kept apart, join noble language to +deep learning, reveal nature's laws by a thousand experiments; and on +all questions proposed, admit every party, and ally themselves to +none. + +TRI. For order, I prefer peripateticism. + +PHI. For abstractions I love Platonism. + +ARM. Epicurus pleases me, for his tenets are solid. + +BEL. I agree with the doctrine of atoms: but I find it difficult to +understand a vacuum, and I much prefer subtile matter. + +TRI. I quite agree with Descartes about magnetism. + +ARM. I like his vortices. + +PHI. And I his falling worlds. [Footnote: Notes do not seem necessary +here; a good English dictionary will give better explanations than +could be given except by very long notes.] + +ARM. I long to see our assembly opened, and to distinguish ourselves +by some great discovery. + +TRI. Much is expected from your enlightened knowledge, for nature has +hidden few things from you. + +PHI. For my part, I have, without boasting, already made one +discovery; I have plainly seen men in the moon. + +BEL. I have not, I believe, as yet quite distinguished men, but I have +seen steeples as plainly as I see you. [Footnote: An astronomer of the +day had boasted of having done this.] + +ARM. In addition to natural philosophy, we will dive into grammar, +history, verse, ethics, and politics. + +PHI. I find in ethics charms which delight my heart; it was formerly +the admiration of great geniuses; but I give the preference to the +Stoics, and I think nothing so grand as their founder. + +ARM. Our regulations in respect to language will soon be known, and +we mean to create a revolution. Through a just or natural antipathy, +we have each of us taken a mortal hatred to certain words, both verbs +and nouns, and these we mutually abandon to each other. We are +preparing sentences of death against them, we shall open our learned +meetings by the proscription of the diverse words of which we mean to +purge both prose and verse. + +PHI. But the greatest project of our assembly--a noble enterprise +which transports me with joy, a glorious design which will be approved +by all the lofty geniuses of posterity--is the cutting out of all +those filthy syllables which, in the finest words, are a source of +scandal: those eternal jests of the fools of all times; those nauseous +commonplaces of wretched buffoons; those sources of infamous +ambiguity, with which the purity of women is insulted. + +TRI. These are indeed admirable projects. + +BEL. You shall see our regulations when they are quite ready. + +TRI. They cannot fail to be wise and beautiful. + +ARM. We shall by our laws be the judges of all works; by our laws, +prose and verse will both alike be submitted to us. No one will have +wit except us or our friends. We shall try to find fault with +everything, and esteem no one capable of writing but ourselves. + + + + +SCENE III--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN, LÉPINE. + +LEP. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). Sir, there is a gentleman who wants to +speak to you; he is dressed all in black, and speaks in a soft tone. +(_They all rise._) + +TRI. It is that learned friend who entreated me so much to procure him +the honour of your acquaintance. + +PHI. You have our full leave to present him to us. (TRISSOTIN +_goes out to meet_ VADIUS.) + + + + +SCENE IV.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +PHI. (_to_ ARMANDE _and_ BÉLISE). At least, let us do him +all the honours of our knowledge. (_To_ HENRIETTE, _who is +going_) Stop! I told you very plainly that I wanted to speak to +you. + +HEN. But what about? + +PHI. You will soon be enlightened on the subject. + + + + +SCENE V.--TRISSOTIN, VADIUS, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. (_introducing_ VADIUS). [Footnote: It is probably Ménage who +is here laughed at.] Here is the gentleman who is dying to see you. In +presenting him I am not afraid, Madam, of being accused of introducing +a profane person to you; he can hold his place among the wits. + +PHI. The hand which introduces him sufficiently proves his value. + +TRI. He has a perfect knowledge of the ancient authors, and knows +Greek, Madam, as well as any man in France. + +PHI. (_to_ BÉLISE). Greek! O heaven! Greek! He understands Greek, +sister! + +BEL. (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah, niece! Greek! + +ARM. Greek! ah! how delightful! + +PHI. What, Sir, you understand Greek? Allow me, I beg, for the love of +Greek, to embrace you. (VADIUS _embraces also_ BÉLISE _and_ +ARMANDE.) + +HEN. (_to_ VADIUS, _who comes forward to embrace her_) +Excuse me, Sir, I do not understand Greek. (_They sit down_.) + +PHI. I have a wonderful respect for Greek books. + +VAD. I fear that the anxiety which calls me to render my homage to you +to-day, Madam, may render me importunate. I may have disturbed some +learned discourse. + +PHI. Sir, with Greek in possession, you can spoil nothing. + +TRI. Moreover, he does wonders in prose as well as in verse, and he +could, if he chose, show you something. + +VAD. The fault of authors is to burden conversation with their +productions; to be at the Palais, in the walks, in the drawing-rooms, +or at table, the indefatigable readers of their tedious verses. As for +me, I think nothing more ridiculous than an author who goes about +begging for praise, who, preying on the ears of the first comers, +often makes them the martyrs of his night watches. I have never been +guilty of such foolish conceit, and I am in that respect of the +opinion of a Greek, who by an express law forbade all his wise men any +unbecoming anxiety to read their works.--Here are some little verses +for young lovers upon which I should like to have your opinion. + +TRI. Your verses have beauties unequalled by any others. + +VAD. Venus and the Graces reign in all yours. TRI. You have an easy +style, and a fine choice of words. + +VAD. In all your writings one finds _ithos_ and _pathos_. + +TRI. We have seen some eclogues of your composition which surpass in +sweetness those of Theocritus and Virgil. + +VAD. Your odes have a noble, gallant, and tender manner, which leaves +Horace far behind. + +TRI. Is there anything more lovely than your canzonets? + +VAD. Is there anything equal to the sonnets you write? + +TRI. Is there anything more charming than your little rondeaus? + +VAD. Anything so full of wit as your madrigals? + +TRI. You are particularly admirable in the ballad. + +VAD. And in _bouts-rimés_ I think you adorable. + +TRI. If France could appreciate your value-- + +VAD. If the age could render justice to a lofty genius-- + +TRI. You would ride in the streets in a gilt coach. + +VAD. We should see the public erect statues to you. Hem...(_to_ +TRISSOTIN). It is a ballad; and I wish you frankly to.... + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Have you heard a certain little sonnet upon +the Princess Urania's fever? + +VAD. Yes; I heard it read yesterday. + +TRI. Do you know the author of it? + +VAD. No, I do not; but I know very well that, to tell him the truth, +his sonnet is good for nothing. + +TRI. Yet a great many people think it admirable. + +VAD. It does not prevent it from being wretched; and if you had read +it, you would think like me. + +TRI. I know that I should differ from you altogether, and that few +people are able to write such a sonnet. + +VAD. Heaven forbid that I should ever write one so bad! + +TRI. I maintain that a better one cannot be made, and my reason is +that I am the author of it. + +VAD. You? + +TRI. Myself. + +VAD. I cannot understand how the thing can have happened. + +TRI. It is unfortunate that I had not the power of pleasing you. + +VAD. My mind must have wandered during the reading, or else the reader +spoilt the sonnet; but let us leave that subject, and come to my +ballad. + +TRI. The ballad is, to my mind, but an insipid thing; it is no longer +the fashion, and savours of ancient times. + +VAD. Yet a ballad has charms for many people. + +TRI. It does not prevent me from thinking it unpleasant. + +VAD. That does not make it worse. + +TRI. It has wonderful attractions for pedants. + +VAD. Yet we see that it does not please you. + +TRI. You stupidly give your qualities to others. + +(_They all rise._) + +VAD. You very impertinently cast yours upon me. + +TRI. Go, you little dunce! you pitiful quill-driver! + +VAD. Go, you penny-a-liner! you disgrace to the profession! + +TRI. Go, you book-maker, you impudent plagiarist! + +VAD. Go, you pedantic snob! + +PHI. Ah! gentlemen, what are you about? + +TRI. (_to_ VADIUS). Go, go, and make restitution to the Greeks +and Romans for all your shameful thefts. + +VAD. Go and do penance on Parnassus for having murdered Horace in your +verses. + +TRI. Remember your book, and the little noise it made. + +VAD. And you, remember your bookseller, reduced to the workhouse. + +TRI. My glory is established; in vain would you endeavour to shake it. + +VAD. Yes, yes; I send you to the author of the 'Satires.' [Footnote: +Boileau.] + +TRI. I, too, send you to him. + +VAD. I have the satisfaction of having been honourably treated by him; +he gives me a passing thrust, and includes me among several authors +well known at the Palais; but he never leaves you in peace, and in all +his verses you are exposed to his attacks. + +TRI: By that we see the honourable rank I hold. He leaves you in the +crowd, and esteems one blow enough to crush you. He has never done you +the honour of repeating his attacks, whereas he assails me separately, +as a noble adversary against whom all his efforts are necessary; and +his blows, repeated against me on all occasions, show that he never +thinks himself victorious. + +VAD. My pen will teach you what sort of man I am. + +TRI. And mine will make you know your master. + +VAD. I defy you in verse, prose, Greek and Latin. + +TRI. Very well, we shall meet each other alone at Barbin's. [Footnote: +Barbin, a famous bookseller. The arms chosen for the duel would no +doubt be books. See "The Lutrin," by Boileau.] + + + + +SCENE VI.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE. + +TRI. Do not blame my anger. It is your judgment I defend, Madam, in +the sonnet he dares to attack. + +PHI. I will do all I can to reconcile you. But let us speak of +something else. Come here, Henriette. I have for some time now been +tormented at finding in you a want of intellectuality, but I have +thought of a means of remedying this defect. + +HEN. You take unnecessary trouble for my sake. I have no love for +learned discourses. I like to take life easy, and it is too much +trouble to be intellectual. Such ambition does not trouble my head, +and I am perfectly satisfied, mother, with being stupid. I prefer to +have only a common way of talking, and not to torment myself to +produce fine words. + +PHI. That may be; but this stupidity wounds me, and it is not my +intention to suffer such a stain on my family. The beauty of the face +is a fragile ornament, a passing flower, a moment's brightness which +only belongs to the epidermis; whereas that of the mind is lasting and +solid. I have therefore been feeling about for the means of giving you +the beauty which time cannot remove--of creating in you the love of +knowledge, of insinuating solid learning into you; and the way I have +at last determined upon is to unite you to a man full of genius; +(_showing_ TRISSOTIN) to this gentleman, in fact. It is he whom I +intend you to marry. + +HEN. Me, mother! + +PHI. Yes, you! just play the fool a little. + +BEL. (_to_ TRISSOTIN). I understand you; your eyes ask me for +leave to engage elsewhere a heart I possess. Be at peace, I consent. I +yield you up to this union; it is a marriage which will establish you +in society. + +TRI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). In my delight, I hardly know what to tell +you, Madam, and this marriage with which I am honoured puts me.... + +HEN. Gently, Sir; it is not concluded yet; do not be in such a hurry. + +PHI. What a way of answering! Do you know that if ... but enough. You +understand me. (_To_ TRISSOTIN) She will obey. Let us leave her +alone for the present. + + + + +SCENE VII.--HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +ARM. You see how our mother's anxiety for your welfare shines forth; +she could not have chosen a more illustrious husband.... + +HEN. If the choice is so good, why do you not take him for yourself? + +ARM. It is upon you, and not upon me, that his hand is bestowed. + +HEN. I yield him up entirely to you as my elder Sister. + +ARM. If marriage seemed so pleasant to me as it seems to be to you, I +would accept your offer with delight. + +HEN. If I loved pedants as you do, I should think the match an +excellent one. + +ARM. Although our tastes differ so in this case, you will still have +to obey our parents, sister. A mother has full power over us, and in +vain do you think by resistance to.... + + + + +SCENE VIII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE. + +CHRY. (_to_ HENRIETTE, _as he presents_ CLITANDRE). Now, my +daughter, you must show your approval of what I do. Take off your +glove, shake hands with this gentleman, and from henceforth in your +heart consider him as the man I want you to marry. + +ARM. Your inclinations on this side are strong enough, sister. + +HEN. We must obey our parents, sister; a father has full power over +us. + +ARM. A mother should have a share of obedience. + +CHRY. What is the meaning of this? + +ARM. I say that I greatly fear you and my mother are not likely to +agree on this point, and this other husband.... + +CHRY. Be silent, you saucy baggage: philosophise as much as you please +with her, and do not meddle with what I do. Tell her what I have done, +and warn her that she is not to come and make me angry. Go at once! + + + + +SCENE IX.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +ARI. That's right; you are doing wonders! + +CLI. What transport! what joy! Ah! how kind fortune is to me! + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). Come, take her hand and pass before us; +take her to her room. Ah! what sweet caresses. (_to_ ARISTE) How +moved my heart is before this tenderness; it cheers up one's old age, +and I can still remember my youthful loving days. + + + + +ACT IV. + +SCENE I.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE. + + +ARM. Yes, there was no hesitation in her; she made a display of her +obedience, and her heart scarcely took time to hear the order. She +seemed less to obey the will of her father than affect to set at +defiance the will of her mother. + +PHI. I will soon show her to which of us two the laws of reason +subject her wishes, and who ought to govern, mother or father, mind or +body, form or matter. + +ARM. At least, they owed you the compliment of consulting you; and +that little gentleman who resolves to become your son-in-law, in spite +of yourself, behaves himself strangely. + +PHI. He has not yet reached the goal of his desires. I thought him +well made, and approved of your love; but his manners were always +unpleasant to me. He knows that I write a little, thank heaven, and +yet he has never desired me to read anything to him. + + + + +SCENE II--ARMANDE, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE (_entering softly and +listening unseen_). + +ARM. If I were you, I would not allow him to become Henriette's +husband. It would be wrong to impute to me the least thought of +speaking like an interested person in this matter, and false to think +that the base trick he is playing me secretly vexes me. By the help of +philosophy, my soul is fortified against such trials; by it we can +rise above everything. But to see him treat you so, provokes me beyond +all endurance. Honour requires you to resist his wishes, and he is not +a man in whom you could find pleasure. In our talks together I never +could see that he had in his heart any respect for you. + +PHI. Poor idiot! + +ARM. In spite of all the reports of your glory, he was always cold in +praising you. + +PHI. The churl! + +ARM. And twenty times have I read to him some of your new productions, +without his ever thinking them fine. + +PHI. The impertinent fellow! + +ARM. We were often at variance about it, and you could hardly believe +what foolish things.... + +CLI (_to_ ARMANDE). Ah! gently, pray. A little charity, or at +least a little truthfulness. What harm have I done to you? and of what +am I guilty that you should thus arm all your eloquence against me to +destroy me, and that you should take so much trouble to render me +odious to those whose assistance I need? Tell me why this great +indignation? (_To_ PHILAMINTE) I am willing to make you, Madam, +an impartial judge between us. + +ARM. If I felt this great wrath with which you accuse me, I could find +enough to authorise it. You deserve it but too well. A first love has +such sacred claims over our hearts, that it would be better to lose +fortune and renounce life than to love a second time. Nothing can be +compared to the crime of changing one's vows, and every faithless +heart is a monster of immorality. + +CLI. Do you call that infidelity, Madam, which the haughtiness of your +mind has forced upon me? I have done nothing but obey the commands it +imposed upon me; and if I offend you, you are the primary cause of the +offence. At first your charms took entire possession of my heart. For +two years I loved you with devoted love; there was no assiduous care, +duty, respect, service, which I did not offer you. But all my +attentions, all my cares, had no power over you. I found you opposed +to my dearest wishes; and what you refused I offered to another. +Consider then, if the fault is mine or yours. Does my heart run after +change, or do you force me to it? Do I leave you, or do you not rather +turn me away? + +ARM. Do you call it being opposed to your love, Sir, if I deprive it +of what there is vulgar in it, and if I wish to reduce it to the +purity in which the beauty of perfect love consists? You cannot for me +keep your thoughts clear and disentangled from the commerce of sense; +and you do not enter into the charms of that union of two hearts in +which the body is ignored. You can only love with a gross and material +passion; and in order to maintain in you the love I have created, you +must have marriage, and all that follows. Ah! what strange love! How +far great souls are from burning with these terrestrial flames! The +senses have no share in all their ardour; their noble passion unites +the hearts only, and treats all else as unworthy. Theirs is a flame +pure and clear like a celestial fire. With this they breathe only +sinless sighs, and never yield to base desires. Nothing impure is +mixed in what they propose to themselves. They love for the sake of +loving, and for nothing else. It is only to the soul that all their +transports are directed, and the body they altogether forget. + +CLI. Unfortunately, Madam, I feel, if you will forgive my saying so, +that I have a body as well as a soul; and that I am too much attached +to that body for me totally to forget it. I do not understand this +separation. Heaven has denied me such philosophy, and my body and soul +go together. There is nothing so beautiful, as you well say, as that +purified love which is directed only to the heart, those unions of the +soul and those tender thoughts so free from the commerce of sense. But +such love is too refined for me. I am, as you observe, a little gross +and material. I love with all my being; and, in the love that is given +to me, I wish to include the whole person. This is not a subject for +lofty self-denial; and, without wishing to wrong your noble +sentiments, I see that in the world my method has a certain vogue; +that marriage is somewhat the fashion, and passes for a tie honourable +and tender enough to have made me wish to become your husband, without +giving you cause to be offended at such a thought. + +ARM. Well, well! Sir, since without being convinced by what I say, +your grosser feelings will be satisfied; since to reduce you to a +faithful love, you must have carnal ties and material chains, I will, +if I have my mother's permission, bring my mind to consent to all you +wish. + +CLI. It is too late; another has accepted before you and if I were to +return to you, I should basely abuse the place of rest in which I +sought refuge, and should wound the goodness of her to whom I fled +when you disdained me. + +PHI. But, Sir, when you thus look forward, do you believe in my +consent to this other marriage? In the midst of your dreams, let it +enter your mind that I have another husband ready for her. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, reconsider your choice, I beseech you; and do not +expose me to such a disgrace. Do not doom me to the unworthy destiny +of seeing myself the rival of Mr. Trissotin. The love of _beaux +esprits_ [Footnote: No single word has given me so much trouble to +translate as this word _esprit_. This time I acknowledge myself +beaten.], which goes against me in your mind, could not have opposed +to me a less noble adversary. There are people whom the bad taste of +the age has reckoned among men of genius; but Mr. Trissotin deceives +nobody, and everyone does justice to the writings he gives us. +Everywhere but here he is esteemed at his just value; and what has +made me wonder above all things is to see you exalt to the sky, stupid +verses which you would have disowned had you yourself written them. + +PHI. If you judge of him differently from us, it is that we see him +with other eyes than you do. + + + + +SCENE III.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +TRI. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). I come to announce you great news. We +have had a narrow escape while we slept. A world passed all along us, +and fell right across our vortex. [Footnote: _Tourbillon_. +Compare act iii scene ii. Another reference to Cotin.] If in its way +it had met with our earth, it would have dashed us to pieces like so +much glass. + +PHI. Let us put off this subject till another season. This gentleman +would understand nothing of it; he professes to cherish ignorance, and +above all to hate intellect and knowledge. + +CLI. This is not altogether the fact; allow me, Madam, to explain +myself. I only hate that kind of intellect and learning which spoils +people. These are good and beautiful in themselves; but I had rather +be numbered among the ignorant than to see myself learned like certain +people. + +TRI. For my part I do not believe, whatever opinion may be held to the +contrary, that knowledge can ever spoil anything. + +CLI. And I hold that knowledge can make great fools both in words and +in deeds. + +TRI. The paradox is rather strong. + +CLI. It would be easy to find proofs; and I believe without being very +clever, that if reasons should fail, notable examples would not be +wanting. + +TRI. You might cite some without proving your point. + +CLI. I should not have far to go to find what I want. + +TRI. As far as I am concerned, I fail to see those notable examples. + +CLI. I see them so well that they almost blind me. + +TRI. I believed hitherto that it was ignorance which made fools, and +not knowledge. + +CLI. You made a great mistake; and I assure you that a learned fool is +more of a fool than an ignorant one. + +TRI. Common sense is against your maxims, since an ignorant man and a +fool are synonymous. + +CLI. If you cling to the strict uses of words, there is a greater +connection between pedant and fool. + +TRI. Folly in the one shows itself openly. + +CLI. And study adds to nature in the other. + +TRI. Knowledge has always its intrinsic value. + +CLI. Knowledge in a pedant becomes impertinence. + +TRI. Ignorance must have great charms for you, since you so eagerly +take up arms in its defence. + +CLI. If ignorance has such charms for me, it is since I have met with +learned people of a certain kind. + +TRI. These learned people of a certain kind may, when we know them +well, be as good as other people of a certain other kind. + +CLI. Yes, if we believe certain learned men; but that remains a +question with certain people. + +PHI. (_to CLITANDRE_.) It seems to me, Sir.... + +CLI. Ah! Madam, I beg of you; this gentleman is surely strong enough +without assistance. I have enough to do already with so strong an +adversary, and as I fight I retreat. + +ARM. But the offensive eagerness with which your answers.... + +CLI. Another ally! I quit the field. + +PHI. Such combats are allowed in conversation, provided you attack no +one in particular. + +CLI. Ah! Madam, there is nothing in all this to offend him. He can +bear raillery as well as any man in France; and he has supported many +other blows without finding his glory tarnished by it. + +TRI. I am not surprised to see this gentleman take such a part in this +contest. He belongs to the court; that is saying everything. The +court, as every one well knows, does not care for learning; it has a +certain interest in supporting ignorance. And it is as a courtier he +takes up its defence. + +CLI. Your are very angry with this poor court. The misfortune is great +indeed to see you men of learning day after day declaiming against it; +making it responsible for all your troubles; calling it to account for +its bad taste, and seeing in it the scapegoat of your ill-success. +Allow me, Mr. Trissotin, to tell you, with all the respect with which +your name inspires me, that you would do well, your brethren and you, +to speak of the court in a more moderate tone; that, after all, it is +not so very stupid as all you gentlemen make it out to be; that it has +good sense enough to appreciate everything; that some good taste can +be acquired there; and that the common sense found there is, without +flattery, well worth all the learning of pedantry. + +TRI. We See some effects of its good taste, Sir. + +CLI. Where do you see, Sir, that its taste is so bad? + +TRI. Where, Sir! Do not Rasius and Balbus by their learning do honour +to France? and yet their merit, so very patent to all, attracts no +notice from the court. + +CLI. I see whence your sorrow comes, and that, through modesty, you +forbear, Sir, to rank yourself with these. Not to drag you in, tell me +what your able heroes do for their country? What service do their +writings render it that they should accuse the court of horrible +injustice, and complain everywhere that it fails to pour down favours +on their learned names? Their knowledge is of great moment to France! +and the court stands in great need of the books they write! These +wretched scribblers get it into their little heads that to be printed +and bound in calf makes them at once important personages in the +state; that with their pens they regulate the destiny of crowns; that +at the least mention of their productions, pensions ought to be poured +down upon them; that the eyes of the whole universe are fixed upon +them, and the glory of their name spread everywhere! They think +themselves prodigies of learning because they know what others have +said before them; because for thirty years they have had eyes and +ears, and have employed nine or ten thousand nights or so in cramming +themselves with Greek and Latin, and in filling their heads with the +indiscriminate plunder of all the old rubbish which lies scattered in +books. They always seem intoxicated with their own knowledge, and for +all merit are rich in importunate babble. Unskilful in everything, +void of common sense, and full of absurdity and impertinence, they +decry everywhere true learning and knowledge. + +PHI. You speak very warmly on the subject, and this transport shows +the working of ill-nature in you. It is the name of rival which +excites in your breast.... + + + + +SCENE IV.--TRISSOTIN, PHILAMINTE, CLITANDRE, ARMANDE, JULIAN. + +JUL. The learned gentleman who paid you a visit just now, Madam, and +whose humble servant I have the honour to be, exhorts you to read this +letter. + +PHI. However important this letter may be, learn, friend, that it is a +piece of rudeness to come and interrupt a conversation, and that a +servant who knows his place should apply first to the people of the +household to be introduced. + +JUL. I will note that down, Madam, in my book. + +PHI. (_reads_). "_Trissotin boasts, Madam, that he is to marry +your daughter. I give you notice that his philosophy aims only at your +wealth, and that you would do well not to conclude this marriage +before you have seen the poem which I am composing against him. While +you are waiting for this portrait, in which I intend to paint him in +all his colours, I send you Horace, Virgil, Terence, and Catullus, +where you will find marked in the margin all the passages he has +pilfered._" + +We see there merit attacked by many enemies because of the marriage I +have decided upon. But this general ill-feeling only prompts me to an +action which will confound envy, and make it feel that whatever it +does only hastens the end. (_To_ JULIAN) Tell all this to your +master; tell him also that in order to let him know how much value I +set on his disinterested advice, and how worthy of being followed I +esteem it, this very evening I shall marry my daughter to this +gentleman (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). + + + + +SCENE V.--PHILAMINTE, ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +PHI. (_to_ CLITANDRE). You, Sir, as a friend of the family, may +assist at the signing of the contract, for I am willing to invite you +to it. Armande, be sure you send for the notary, and tell your sister +of my decision. + +ARM. There is no need of saying anything to my sister; this gentleman +will be pretty sure to take the news to her, and try and dispose her +heart to rebellion. + +PHI. We shall see who has most power over her, and whether I can bring +her to a sense of her duty. + + + + +SCENE VI.--ARMANDE, CLITANDRE. + +ARM. I am very sorry to see, Sir, that things are not going quite +according to your views. + +CLI. I shall go and do all I can not to leave this serious anxiety +upon your mind. + +ARM. I am afraid that your efforts will not be very successful. + +CLI. You may perhaps see that your fears are without foundation. + +ARM. I hope it may be so. + +CLI. I am persuaded that I shall have all your help. + +ARM. Yes, I will second you with all my power. + +CLI. And I shall be sure to be most grateful. + + + + +SCENE VII.--CHRYSALE, ARISTE, HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. I should be most unfortunate without your assistance, Sir, for +your wife has rejected my offer, and, her mind being prepossessed in +favour of Trissotin, she insists upon having him for a son-in-law. + +CHRY. But what fancy is this that she has got into her head? Why in +the world will she have this Mr. Trissotin? + +ARI. It is because he has the honour of rhyming with Latin that he is +carrying it off over the head of his rival. + +CLI. She wants to conclude this marriage to-night. + +CHRY. To-night? + +CLI. Yes, to-night. + +CHRY. Well! and this very night I will, in order to thwart her, have +you both married. + +CLI. She has sent for the notary to draw up the contract. + +CHRY. And I will go and fetch him for the one he must draw up. + +CLI. And Henriette is to be told by her sister of the marriage to +which she must look forward. + +CHRY. And I command her with full authority to prepare herself for +this other alliance. Ah! I will show them if there is any other master +but myself to give orders in the house. (_To_ HENRIETTE) We will +return soon. Now, come along with me, brother; and you also, my +son-in-law. + +HEN. (_to_ ARISTE). Alas! try to keep him in this disposition. + +ARI. I will do everything to serve your love. + + + + +SCENE VIII.--HENRIETTE, CLITANDRE. + +CLI. However great may be the help that is promised to my love, my +greatest hope is in your constancy. + +HEN. You know that you may be sure of my love. + +CLI. I see nothing to fear as long as I have that. + +HEN. You see to what a union they mean to force me. + +CLI. As long as your heart belongs entirely to me, I see nothing to +fear. + +HEN. I will try everything for the furtherance of our dearest wishes, +and if after all I cannot be yours, there is a sure retreat I have +resolved upon, which will save me from belonging to any one else. + +CLI. May Heaven spare me from ever receiving from you that proof of +your love. + + + + +ACT V. + +SCENE I.--HENRIETTE, TRISSOTIN. + + +HEN. It is about the marriage which my mother has set her heart upon +that I wish, Sir, to speak privately to you; and I thought that, +seeing how our home is disturbed by it, I should be able to make you +listen to reason. You are aware that with me you will receive a +considerable dowry; but money, which we see so many people esteem, has +no charms worthy of a philosopher; and contempt for wealth and earthly +grandeur should not show itself in your words only. + +TRI. Therefore it is not that which charms me in you; but your +dazzling beauty, your sweet and piercing eyes, your grace, your noble +air--these are the wealth, the riches, which have won for you my vows +and love; it is of those treasures only that I am enamoured. + +HEN. I thank you for your generous love; I ought to feel grateful and +to respond to it; I regret that I cannot; I esteem you as much as one +can esteem another; but in me I find an obstacle to loving you. You +know that a heart cannot be given to two people, and I feel that +Clitandre has taken entire possession of mine. I know that he has much +less merit than you, that I have not fit discrimination for the choice +of a husband, and that with your many talents yon ought to please me. +I see that I am wrong, but I cannot help it; and all the power that +reason has over me is to make me angry with myself for such blindness. + +TRI. The gift of your hand, to which I am allowed to aspire, will give +me the heart possessed by Clitandre; for by a thousand tender cares I +have reason to hope that I shall succeed in making myself loved. + +HEN. No; my heart is bound to its first love, and cannot be touched by +your cares and attention. I explain myself plainly with you, and my +confession ought in no way to hurt your feelings. The love which +springs up in the heart is not, as you know, the effect of merit, but +is partly decided by caprice; and oftentimes, when some one pleases +us, we can barely find the reason. If choice and wisdom guided love, +all the tenderness of my heart would be for you; but love is not thus +guided. Leave me, I pray, to my blindness; and do not profit by the +violence which, for your sake, is imposed on my obedience. A man of +honour will owe nothing to the power which parents have over us; he +feels a repugnance to exact a self-sacrifice from her he loves, and +will not obtain a heart by force. Do not encourage my mother to +exercise, for your sake, the absolute power she has over me. Give up +your love for me, and carry to another the homage of a heart so +precious as yours. + +TRI. For this heart to satisfy you, you must impose upon it laws it +can obey. Could it cease to love you, Madam, unless you ceased to be +loveable, and could cease to display those celestial charms.... + +HEN. Ah! Sir, leave aside all this trash; you are encumbered with so +many Irises, Phyllises, Amaranthas, which everywhere in your verses +you paint as charming, and to whom you swear such love, that.... + +TRI. It is the mind that speaks, and not the heart. With them it is +only the poet that is in love; but it is in earnest that I love the +adorable Henriette. + +HEN. Ah, Sir, I beg of you.... + +TRI. If I offend you, my offence is not likely to cease. This love, +ignored by you to this day, will be of eternal duration. Nothing can +put a stop to its delightful transports; and although your beauty +condemns my endeavours, I cannot refuse the help of a mother who +wishes to crown such a precious flame. Provided I succeed in obtaining +such great happiness, provided I obtain your hand, it matters little +to me how it comes to pass. + +HEN. But are you aware, Sir, that you risk more than you think by +using violence; and to be plain with you, that it is not safe to marry +a girl against her wish, for she might well have recourse to a certain +revenge that a husband should fear. + +TRI. Such a speech has nothing that can make me alter my purpose. A +philosopher is prepared against every event. Cured by reason of all +vulgar weaknesses, he rises above these things, and is far from +minding what does not depend on him. [Footnote: Compare 'School for +Wives,' act iv. scene vi.] + +HEN. Truly, Sir, I am delighted to hear you; and I had no idea that +philosophy was so capable of teaching men to bear such accidents with +constancy. This wonderful strength of mind deserves to have a fit +subject to illustrate it, and to find one who may take pleasure in +giving it an occasion for its full display. As, however, to say the +truth, I do not feel equal to the task, I will leave it to another; +and, between ourselves, I assure you that I renounce altogether the +happiness of seeing you my husband. + +TRI. (_going_). We shall see by-and-by how the affair will end. +In the next room, close at hand, is the notary waiting. + + + + +SCENE II.--CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE. + +CHRY. I am glad, my daughter, to see you; come here and fulfil your +duty, by showing obedience to the will of your father. I will teach +your mother how to behave, and, to defy her more fully, here is +Martine, whom I have brought back to take her old place in the house +again. + +HEN. Your resolution deserves praise. I beg of you, father, never to +change the disposition you are in. Be firm in what you have resolved, +and do not suffer yourself to be the dupe of your own good-nature. Do +not yield; and I pray you to act so as to hinder my mother from having +her own way. + +CHRY. How! Do you take me for a booby? + +HEN. Heaven forbid! + +CHRY. Am I a fool, pray? + +HEN. I do not say that. + +CHRY. Am I thought unfit to have the decision of a man of sense? + +HEN. No, father. + +CHRY. Ought I not at my age to know how to be master at home? + +HEN. Of course. + +CHRY. Do you think me weak enough to allow my wife to lead me by the +nose? + +HEN. Oh dear, no, father. + +CHRY. Well, then, what do you mean? You are a nice girl to speak to me +as you do! + +HEN. If I have displeased you, father, I have done so unintentionally. + +CHRY. My will is law in this place. + +HEN. Certainly, father. + +CHRY. No one but myself has in this house a right to command. + +HEN. Yes, you are right, father. + +CHRY. It is I who hold the place of chief of the family. + +HEN. Agreed. + +CHRY. It is I who ought to dispose of my daughter's hand. + +HEN. Yes, indeed, father. + +CHRY. Heaven has given me full power over you. + +HEN. No one, father, says anything to the contrary. + +CHRY. And as to choosing a husband, I will show you that it is your +father, and not your mother, whom you have to obey. + +HEN. Alas! in that you respond to my dearest wish. Exact obedience to +you is my earnest wish. + +CHRY. We shall see if my wife will prove rebellious to my will. + +CLI. Here she is, and she brings the notary with her. + +CHRY. Back me up, all of you. + +MAR. Leave that to me; I will take care to encourage you, if need be. + + + + +SCENE III.--PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, +CHRYSALE, CLITANDRE, HENRIETTE, MARTINE. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). Can you not alter your barbarous style, +and give us a contract couched in noble language? + +NOT. Our style is very good, and I should be a blockhead, Madam, to +try and change a single word. + +BEL. Ah! what barbarism in the very midst of France! But yet, Sir, for +learning's sake, allow us, instead of crowns, livres, and francs, to +have the dowry expressed in minae and talents, and to express the date +in Ides and Kalends. + +NOT. I, Madam? If I were to do such a thing, all my colleagues would +hiss me. + +PHI. It is useless to complain of all this barbarism. Come, Sir, sit +down and write. (_Seeing_ MARTINE) Ah! this impudent hussy dares +to show herself here again! Why was she brought back, I should like to +know? + +CHRY. We will tell you by-and-by; we have now something else to do. + +NOT. Let us proceed with the contract. Where is the future bride? + +PHI. It is the younger daughter I give in marriage. + +NOT. Good. + +CHRY. (_showing_ HENRIETTE). Yes, Sir, here she is; her name is +Henriette. + +NOT. Very well; and the future bridegroom? + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). This gentleman is the husband I give +her. + +CHRY. (_showing_ CLITANDRE). And the husband I wish her to marry +is this gentleman. + +NOT. Two husbands! Custom does not allow of more than one. + +PHI. (_to the_ NOTARY). What is it that is stopping you? Put down +Mr. Trissotin as my son-in-law. + +CHRY. For my son-in-law put down Mr. Clitandre. + +NOT. Try and agree together, and come to a quiet decision as to who is +to be the future husband. + +PHI. Abide, Sir, abide by my own choice. + +CHRY. Do, Sir, do according to my will. + +NOT. Tell me which of the two I must obey. + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! you will go against my wishes. + +CHRY. I cannot allow my daughter to be sought after only because of +the wealth which is in my family. + +PHI. Really! as if anyone here thought of your wealth, and as if it +were a subject worthy the anxiety of a wise man. + +CHRY. In short, I have fixed on Clitandre. + +PHI. (_showing_ TRISSOTIN). And I am decided that for a husband +she shall have this gentleman. My choice shall be followed; the thing +is settled. + +CHRY. Heyday! you assume here a very high tone. + +MAR. 'Tisn't for the wife to lay down the law, and I be one to give up +the lead to the men in everything. + +CHRY. That is well said. + +MAR. If my discharge was as sure as a gun, what I says is, that the +hen hadn't ought to be heard when the cock's there. + +CHRY. Just so. + +MAR. And we all know that a man is always chaffed, when at home his +wife wears the breeches. + +CHRY. It is perfectly true. + +MAR. I says that, if I had a husband, I would have him be the master +of the house. I should not care a bit for him if he played the +henpecked husband; and if I resisted him out of caprice, or if I spoke +too loud, I should think it quite right if, with a couple of boxes on +the ear, he made me pitch it lower. + +CHRY. You speak as you ought. + +MAR. Master is quite right to want a proper husband for his daughter. + +CHRY. Certainly. + +MAR. Why should he refuse her Clitandre, who is young and handsome, in +order to give her a scholar, who is always splitting hairs about +something? She wants a husband and not a pedagogue, and as she cares +neither for Greek nor Latin, she has no need of Mr. Trissotin. + +CHRY. Excellent. + +PHI. We must suffer her to chatter on at her ease. + +MAR. Learned people are only good to preach in a pulpit, and I have +said a thousand times that I wouldn't have a learned man for my +husband. Learning is not at all what is wanted in a household. Books +agree badly with marriage, and if ever I consent to engage myself to +anybody, it will be to a husband who has no other book but me, who +doesn't know _a_ from _b_--no offence to you, Madam--and, in +short, who would be clever only for his wife. [Footnote: In this +scene, as in act ii. scenes v. and vi., Martine speaks very correctly +at times.] + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). Is it finished? and have I listened +patiently enough to your worthy interpreter? + +CHRY. She has only said the truth. + +PHI. And I, to put an end to this dispute, will have my wish obeyed. +(_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) Henriette _and_ this gentleman shall be +united at once. I have said it, and I will have it so. Make no reply; +and if you have given your word to Clitandre, offer him her elder sister. + +CHRY. Ah! this is a way out of the difficulty. (_To_ HENRIETTE +and CLITANDRE) Come, do you consent? + +HEN. How! father...! + +CLI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). What! Sir...! + +BEL. Propositions more to his taste might be made. But we are +establishing a kind of love which must be as pure as the morning-star; +the thinking substance is admitted, but not the material substance. + + + + +SCENE IV.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, HENRIETTE, ARMANDE, +TRISSOTIN, A NOTARY, CLITANDRE, MARTINE. + +ARI. I am sorry to have to trouble this happy ceremony by the sad +tidings of which I am obliged to be bearer. These two letters make me +bring news which have made me feel grievously for you. (_To_ +PHILAMINTE) One letter is for you, and comes from your attorney. +(_To_ CHRYSALE) The other comes from Lyons. + +PHI. What misfortune can be sent us worthy of troubling us? + +ARI. You can read it in this letter. + +PHI. _"Madam, I have asked your brother to give you this letter; it +will tell you news which I did not dare to come and tell you myself. +The great negligence you have shown in your affairs has been the cause +that the clerk of your attorney has not forewarned me, and you have +altogether lost the lawsuit which you ought to have gained."_ + +CHRY. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). Your lawsuit lost! + +PHI. (_to_ CHRYSALE). You seem very much upset; my heart is in no +way troubled by such a blow. Show, show like me, a less vulgar mind +wherewith to brave the ills of fortune. "Your want of care will cost +you forty thousand crowns, and you are condemned to pay this sum with +all costs." Condemned? Ah! this is a shocking word, and only fit for +criminals. + +ARI. It is the wrong word, no doubt, and you, with reason, protest +against it. It should have been, "You are desired by an order of the +court to pay immediately forty thousand crowns and costs." + +PHI. Let us see the other. + +CHRY. _"Sir, the friendship which binds me to your brother prompts +me to take a lively interest in all that concerns you. I know that you +had placed your fortune entirely in the hands of Argante and Damon, +and I acquaint you with the news that they have both failed."_ O +Heaven! to lose everything thus in a moment! + +PHI. (_to CHRYSALE_.) Ah! what a shameful outburst Fie! For the +truly wise there is no fatal change of fortune, and, losing all, he +still remains himself. Let us finish the business we have in hand; and +please cast aside your sorrow. (_Showing_ TRISSOTIN) His wealth +will be sufficient for us and for him. + +TRI. No, Madam; cease, I pray you, from pressing this affair further. +I see that everybody is opposed to this marriage, and I have no +intention of forcing the wills of others. + +PHI. This reflection, Sir, comes very quickly after our reverse of +fortune. + +TRI. I am tired at last of so much resistance, and prefer to +relinquish all attempts at removing these obstacles. I do not wish for +a heart that will not surrender itself. + +PHI. I see in you, and that not to your honour, what I have hitherto +refused to believe. + +TRI. You may see whatever you please, and it matters little to me how +you take what you see. I am not a man to put up with the disgrace of +the refusals with which I have been insulted here. I am well worthy of +more consideration, and whoever thinks otherwise, I am her humble +servant. (_Exit_.) + + + + +SCENE V.--ARISTE, CHRYSALE, PHILAMINTE, BÉLISE, ARMANDE, HENRIETTE, +CLITANDRE, A NOTARY, MARTINE. + +PHI. How plainly he has disclosed his mercenary soul, and how little +like a philosopher he has acted. + +CLI. I have no pretension to being one; but, Madam, I will link my +destiny to yours, and I offer you, with myself, all that I possess. + +PHI. Yon delight me, Sir, by this generous action, and I will reward +your love. Yes, I grant Henriette to the eager affection.... + +HEN. No, mother. I have altered my mind; forgive me if now I resist +your will. + +CLI. What! do you refuse me happiness, and now that I see everybody +for me.... + +HEN. I know how little you possess, Clitandre; and I always desired +you for a husband when, by satisfying my most ardent wishes, I saw +that our marriage would improve your fortune. But in the face of such +reverses, I love you enough not to burden you with our adversity. + +CLI. With you any destiny would be happiness, without you misery. + +HEN. Love in its ardour generally speaks thus. Let us avoid the +torture of vexatious recriminations. Nothing irritates such a tie more +than the wretched wants of life. After a time we accuse each other of +all the sorrows that follow such an engagement. + +ARI. (_to_ HENRIETTE). Is what you have just said the only reason +which makes you refuse to marry Clitandre? + +HEN. Yes; otherwise you would see me ready to fly to this union with +all my heart. + +ARI. Suffer yourself, then, to be bound by such gentle ties. The news +I brought you was false. It was a stratagem, a happy thought I had to +serve your love by deceiving my sister, and by showing her what her +philosopher would prove when put to the test. + +CHRY. Heaven be praised! + +PHI. I am delighted at heart for the vexation which this cowardly +deserter will feel. The punishment of his sordid avarice will be to +see in what a splendid manner this match will be concluded. + +CHRY. (_to_ CLITANDRE). I told you that you would marry her. + +ARM. (_to_ PHILAMINTE). So, then, you sacrifice me to their love? + +PHI. It will not be to sacrifice you; you have the support of your +philosophy, and you can with a contented mind see their love crowned. + +BEL. Let him take care, for I still retain my place in his heart. +Despair often leads people to conclude a hasty marriage, of which they +repent ever after. + +CHRY. (_to the_ NOTARY). Now, Sir, execute my orders, and draw up +the contract in accordance with what I said. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Learned Women, by Moliere (Poquelin) + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE LEARNED WOMEN *** + +This file should be named 8lwom10.txt or 8lwom10.zip +Corrected EDITIONS of our eBooks get a new NUMBER, 8lwom11.txt +VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, 8lwom10a.txt + +Produced by Delphine Lettau, Charles Franks and the people at DP + +Project Gutenberg eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the US +unless a copyright notice is included. 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