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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Posthumous Works
+       of the Author of A Vindication of the Rights of Woman
+
+Author: Mary Wollstonecraft
+
+Editor: William Godwin
+
+Release Date: October 29, 2007 [EBook #23233]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POSTHUMOUS WORKS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Jonathan Ingram, Online Distributed Proofreading
+Team at http://www.pgdp.net and the booksmiths at
+http://www.eBookForge.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.
+
+VOL. I.
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. I.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+THE
+
+WRONGS OF WOMAN:
+
+OR,
+
+MARIA.
+
+A FRAGMENT.
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. I.
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE.
+
+
+THE public are here presented with the last literary attempt of an
+author, whose fame has been uncommonly extensive, and whose talents have
+probably been most admired, by the persons by whom talents are estimated
+with the greatest accuracy and discrimination. There are few, to whom her
+writings could in any case have given pleasure, that would have wished
+that this fragment should have been suppressed, because it is a fragment.
+There is a sentiment, very dear to minds of taste and imagination, that
+finds a melancholy delight in contemplating these unfinished productions
+of genius, these sketches of what, if they had been filled up in a manner
+adequate to the writer's conception, would perhaps have given a new
+impulse to the manners of a world.
+
+The purpose and structure of the following work, had long formed a
+favourite subject of meditation with its author, and she judged them
+capable of producing an important effect. The composition had been in
+progress for a period of twelve months. She was anxious to do justice to
+her conception, and recommenced and revised the manuscript several
+different times. So much of it as is here given to the public, she was
+far from considering as finished, and, in a letter to a friend directly
+written on this subject, she says, "I am perfectly aware that some of the
+incidents ought to be transposed, and heightened by more harmonious
+shading; and I wished in some degree to avail myself of criticism, before
+I began to adjust my events into a story, the outline of which I had
+sketched in my mind[x-A]." The only friends to whom the author
+communicated her manuscript, were Mr. Dyson, the translator of the
+Sorcerer, and the present editor; and it was impossible for the most
+inexperienced author to display a stronger desire of profiting by the
+censures and sentiments that might be suggested[x-B].
+
+In revising these sheets for the press, it was necessary for the editor,
+in some places, to connect the more finished parts with the pages of an
+older copy, and a line or two in addition sometimes appeared requisite
+for that purpose. Wherever such a liberty has been taken, the additional
+phrases will be found inclosed in brackets; it being the editor's most
+earnest desire, to intrude nothing of himself into the work, but to give
+to the public the words, as well as ideas, of the real author.
+
+What follows in the ensuing pages, is not a preface regularly drawn out
+by the author, but merely hints for a preface, which, though never filled
+up in the manner the writer intended, appeared to be worth preserving.
+
+W. GODWIN.
+
+
+
+
+AUTHOR'S PREFACE.
+
+
+THE Wrongs of Woman, like the wrongs of the oppressed part of mankind,
+may be deemed necessary by their oppressors: but surely there are a few,
+who will dare to advance before the improvement of the age, and grant
+that my sketches are not the abortion of a distempered fancy, or the
+strong delineations of a wounded heart.
+
+In writing this novel, I have rather endeavoured to pourtray passions
+than manners.
+
+In many instances I could have made the incidents more dramatic, would I
+have sacrificed my main object, the desire of exhibiting the misery and
+oppression, peculiar to women, that arise out of the partial laws and
+customs of society.
+
+In the invention of the story, this view restrained my fancy; and the
+history ought rather to be considered, as of woman, than of an
+individual.
+
+The sentiments I have embodied.
+
+In many works of this species, the hero is allowed to be mortal, and to
+become wise and virtuous as well as happy, by a train of events and
+circumstances. The heroines, on the contrary, are to be born immaculate;
+and to act like goddesses of wisdom, just come forth highly finished
+Minervas from the head of Jove.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[The following is an extract of a letter from the author to a friend, to
+whom she communicated her manuscript.]
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+For my part, I cannot suppose any situation more distressing, than for a
+woman of sensibility, with an improving mind, to be bound to such a man
+as I have described for life; obliged to renounce all the humanizing
+affections, and to avoid cultivating her taste, lest her perception of
+grace and refinement of sentiment, should sharpen to agony the pangs of
+disappointment. Love, in which the imagination mingles its bewitching
+colouring, must be fostered by delicacy. I should despise, or rather call
+her an ordinary woman, who could endure such a husband as I have
+sketched.
+
+These appear to me (matrimonial despotism of heart and conduct) to be the
+peculiar Wrongs of Woman, because they degrade the mind. What are termed
+great misfortunes, may more forcibly impress the mind of common readers;
+they have more of what may justly be termed _stage-effect_; but it is the
+delineation of finer sensations, which, in my opinion, constitutes the
+merit of our best novels. This is what I have in view; and to show the
+wrongs of different classes of women, equally oppressive, though, from
+the difference of education, necessarily various.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[x-A] A more copious extract of this letter is subjoined to the author's
+preface.
+
+[x-B] The part communicated consisted of the first fourteen chapters.
+
+
+
+
+ERRATA.
+
+Page 3, line 2, _dele_ half.
+
+P. 81 and 118, _for_ brackets [--], _read_ inverted commas " thus "
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+VOL. I. AND II.
+
+The Wrongs of Woman, or Maria; a Fragment:
+to which is added, the First Book
+of a Series of Lessons for Children.
+
+VOL. III. AND IV.
+
+Letters and Miscellaneous Pieces.
+
+
+
+
+_WRONGS_
+
+OF
+
+WOMAN.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. I.
+
+
+ABODES of horror have frequently been described, and castles, filled with
+spectres and chimeras, conjured up by the magic spell of genius to harrow
+the soul, and absorb the wondering mind. But, formed of such stuff as
+dreams are made of, what were they to the mansion of despair, in one
+corner of which Maria sat, endeavouring to recal her scattered thoughts!
+
+Surprise, astonishment, that bordered on distraction, seemed to have
+suspended her faculties, till, waking by degrees to a keen sense of
+anguish, a whirlwind of rage and indignation roused her torpid pulse. One
+recollection with frightful velocity following another, threatened to
+fire her brain, and make her a fit companion for the terrific
+inhabitants, whose groans and shrieks were no unsubstantial sounds of
+whistling winds, or startled birds, modulated by a romantic fancy, which
+amuse while they affright; but such tones of misery as carry a dreadful
+certainty directly to the heart. What effect must they then have produced
+on one, true to the touch of sympathy, and tortured by maternal
+apprehension!
+
+Her infant's image was continually floating on Maria's sight, and the
+first smile of intelligence remembered, as none but a mother, an unhappy
+mother, can conceive. She heard her half speaking cooing, and felt the
+little twinkling fingers on her burning bosom--a bosom bursting with the
+nutriment for which this cherished child might now be pining in vain.
+From a stranger she could indeed receive the maternal aliment, Maria was
+grieved at the thought--but who would watch her with a mother's
+tenderness, a mother's self-denial?
+
+The retreating shadows of former sorrows rushed back in a gloomy train,
+and seemed to be pictured on the walls of her prison, magnified by the
+state of mind in which they were viewed--Still she mourned for her child,
+lamented she was a daughter, and anticipated the aggravated ills of life
+that her sex rendered almost inevitable, even while dreading she was no
+more. To think that she was blotted out of existence was agony, when the
+imagination had been long employed to expand her faculties; yet to
+suppose her turned adrift on an unknown sea, was scarcely less
+afflicting.
+
+After being two days the prey of impetuous, varying emotions, Maria began
+to reflect more calmly on her present situation, for she had actually
+been rendered incapable of sober reflection, by the discovery of the act
+of atrocity of which she was the victim. She could not have imagined,
+that, in all the fermentation of civilized depravity, a similar plot
+could have entered a human mind. She had been stunned by an unexpected
+blow; yet life, however joyless, was not to be indolently resigned, or
+misery endured without exertion, and proudly termed patience. She had
+hitherto meditated only to point the dart of anguish, and suppressed the
+heart heavings of indignant nature merely by the force of contempt. Now
+she endeavoured to brace her mind to fortitude, and to ask herself what
+was to be her employment in her dreary cell? Was it not to effect her
+escape, to fly to the succour of her child, and to baffle the selfish
+schemes of her tyrant--her husband?
+
+These thoughts roused her sleeping spirit, and the self-possession
+returned, that seemed to have abandoned her in the infernal solitude into
+which she had been precipitated. The first emotions of overwhelming
+impatience began to subside, and resentment gave place to tenderness, and
+more tranquil meditation; though anger once more stopt the calm current
+of reflection, when she attempted to move her manacled arms. But this
+was an outrage that could only excite momentary feelings of scorn, which
+evaporated in a faint smile; for Maria was far from thinking a personal
+insult the most difficult to endure with magnanimous indifference.
+
+She approached the small grated window of her chamber, and for a
+considerable time only regarded the blue expanse; though it commanded a
+view of a desolate garden, and of part of a huge pile of buildings, that,
+after having been suffered, for half a century, to fall to decay, had
+undergone some clumsy repairs, merely to render it habitable. The ivy had
+been torn off the turrets, and the stones not wanted to patch up the
+breaches of time, and exclude the warring elements, left in heaps in the
+disordered court. Maria contemplated this scene she knew not how long; or
+rather gazed on the walls, and pondered on her situation. To the master
+of this most horrid of prisons, she had, soon after her entrance, raved
+of injustice, in accents that would have justified his treatment, had not
+a malignant smile, when she appealed to his judgment, with a dreadful
+conviction stifled her remonstrating complaints. By force, or openly,
+what could be done? But surely some expedient might occur to an active
+mind, without any other employment, and possessed of sufficient
+resolution to put the risk of life into the balance with the chance of
+freedom.
+
+A woman entered in the midst of these reflections, with a firm,
+deliberate step, strongly marked features, and large black eyes, which
+she fixed steadily on Maria's, as if she designed to intimidate her,
+saying at the same time--"You had better sit down and eat your dinner,
+than look at the clouds."
+
+"I have no appetite," replied Maria, who had previously determined to
+speak mildly, "why then should I eat?"
+
+"But, in spite of that, you must and shall eat something. I have had many
+ladies under my care, who have resolved to starve themselves; but, soon
+or late, they gave up their intent, as they recovered their senses."
+
+"Do you really think me mad?" asked Maria, meeting the searching glance
+of her eye.
+
+"Not just now. But what does that prove?--only that you must be the more
+carefully watched, for appearing at times so reasonable. You have not
+touched a morsel since you entered the house."--Maria sighed
+intelligibly.--"Could any thing but madness produce such a disgust for
+food?"
+
+"Yes, grief; you would not ask the question if you knew what it was." The
+attendant shook her head; and a ghastly smile of desperate fortitude
+served as a forcible reply, and made Maria pause, before she added--"Yet
+I will take some refreshment: I mean not to die.--No; I will preserve my
+senses; and convince even you, sooner than you are aware of, that my
+intellects have never been disturbed, though the exertion of them may
+have been suspended by some infernal drug."
+
+Doubt gathered still thicker on the brow of her guard, as she attempted
+to convict her of mistake.
+
+"Have patience!" exclaimed Maria, with a solemnity that inspired awe. "My
+God! how have I been schooled into the practice!" A suffocation of voice
+betrayed the agonizing emotions she was labouring to keep down; and
+conquering a qualm of disgust, she calmly endeavoured to eat enough to
+prove her docility, perpetually turning to the suspicious female, whose
+observation she courted, while she was making the bed and adjusting the
+room.
+
+"Come to me often," said Maria, with a tone of persuasion, in consequence
+of a vague plan that she had hastily adopted, when, after surveying this
+woman's form and features, she felt convinced that she had an
+understanding above the common standard; "and believe me mad, till you
+are obliged to acknowledge the contrary." The woman was no fool, that is,
+she was superior to her class; nor had misery quite petrified the
+life's-blood of humanity, to which reflections on our own misfortunes
+only give a more orderly course. The manner, rather than the
+expostulations, of Maria made a slight suspicion dart into her mind with
+corresponding sympathy, which various other avocations, and the habit of
+banishing compunction, prevented her, for the present, from examining
+more minutely.
+
+But when she was told that no person, excepting the physician appointed
+by her family, was to be permitted to see the lady at the end of the
+gallery, she opened her keen eyes still wider, and uttered a--"hem!"
+before she enquired--"Why?" She was briefly told, in reply, that the
+malady was hereditary, and the fits not occurring but at very long and
+irregular intervals, she must be carefully watched; for the length of
+these lucid periods only rendered her more mischievous, when any vexation
+or caprice brought on the paroxysm of phrensy.
+
+Had her master trusted her, it is probable that neither pity nor
+curiosity would have made her swerve from the straight line of her
+interest; for she had suffered too much in her intercourse with mankind,
+not to determine to look for support, rather to humouring their passions,
+than courting their approbation by the integrity of her conduct. A deadly
+blight had met her at the very threshold of existence; and the
+wretchedness of her mother seemed a heavy weight fastened on her innocent
+neck, to drag her down to perdition. She could not heroically determine
+to succour an unfortunate; but, offended at the bare supposition that she
+could be deceived with the same ease as a common servant, she no longer
+curbed her curiosity; and, though she never seriously fathomed her own
+intentions, she would sit, every moment she could steal from observation,
+listening to the tale, which Maria was eager to relate with all the
+persuasive eloquence of grief.
+
+It is so cheering to see a human face, even if little of the divinity of
+virtue beam in it, that Maria anxiously expected the return of the
+attendant, as of a gleam of light to break the gloom of idleness.
+Indulged sorrow; she perceived, must blunt or sharpen the faculties to
+the two opposite extremes; producing stupidity, the moping melancholy of
+indolence; or the restless activity of a disturbed imagination. She sunk
+into one state, after being fatigued by the other: till the want of
+occupation became even more painful than the actual pressure or
+apprehension of sorrow; and the confinement that froze her into a nook of
+existence, with an unvaried prospect before her, the most insupportable
+of evils. The lamp of life seemed to be spending itself to chase the
+vapours of a dungeon which no art could dissipate.--And to what purpose
+did she rally all her energy?--Was not the world a vast prison, and women
+born slaves?
+
+Though she failed immediately to rouse a lively sense of injustice in the
+mind of her guard, because it had been sophisticated into misanthropy,
+she touched her heart. Jemima (she had only a claim to a Christian name,
+which had not procured her any Christian privileges) could patiently hear
+of Maria's confinement on false pretences; she had felt the crushing hand
+of power, hardened by the exercise of injustice, and ceased to wonder at
+the perversions of the understanding, which systematize oppression; but,
+when told that her child, only four months old, had been torn from her,
+even while she was discharging the tenderest maternal office, the woman
+awoke in a bosom long estranged from feminine emotions, and Jemima
+determined to alleviate all in her power, without hazarding the loss of
+her place, the sufferings of a wretched mother, apparently injured, and
+certainly unhappy. A sense of right seems to result from the simplest act
+of reason, and to preside over the faculties of the mind, like the
+master-sense of feeling, to rectify the rest; but (for the comparison may
+be carried still farther) how often is the exquisite sensibility of both
+weakened or destroyed by the vulgar occupations, and ignoble pleasures of
+life?
+
+The preserving her situation was, indeed, an important object to Jemima,
+who had been hunted from hole to hole, as if she had been a beast of
+prey, or infected with a moral plague. The wages she received, the
+greater part of which she hoarded, as her only chance for independence,
+were much more considerable than she could reckon on obtaining any where
+else, were it possible that she, an outcast from society, could be
+permitted to earn a subsistence in a reputable family. Hearing Maria
+perpetually complain of listlessness, and the not being able to beguile
+grief by resuming her customary pursuits, she was easily prevailed on, by
+compassion, and that involuntary respect for abilities, which those who
+possess them can never eradicate, to bring her some books and implements
+for writing. Maria's conversation had amused and interested her, and the
+natural consequence was a desire, scarcely observed by herself, of
+obtaining the esteem of a person she admired. The remembrance of better
+days was rendered more lively; and the sentiments then acquired appearing
+less romantic than they had for a long period, a spark of hope roused
+her mind to new activity.
+
+How grateful was her attention to Maria! Oppressed by a dead weight of
+existence, or preyed on by the gnawing worm of discontent, with what
+eagerness did she endeavour to shorten the long days, which left no
+traces behind! She seemed to be sailing on the vast ocean of life,
+without seeing any land-mark to indicate the progress of time; to find
+employment was then to find variety, the animating principle of nature.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. II.
+
+
+EARNESTLY as Maria endeavoured to soothe, by reading, the anguish of her
+wounded mind, her thoughts would often wander from the subject she was
+led to discuss, and tears of maternal tenderness obscured the reasoning
+page. She descanted on "the ills which flesh is heir to," with
+bitterness, when the recollection of her babe was revived by a tale of
+fictitious woe, that bore any resemblance to her own; and her imagination
+was continually employed, to conjure up and embody the various phantoms
+of misery, which folly and vice had let loose on the world. The loss of
+her babe was the tender string; against other cruel remembrances she
+laboured to steel her bosom; and even a ray of hope, in the midst of her
+gloomy reveries, would sometimes gleam on the dark horizon of futurity,
+while persuading herself that she ought to cease to hope, since happiness
+was no where to be found.--But of her child, debilitated by the grief
+with which its mother had been assailed before it saw the light, she
+could not think without an impatient struggle.
+
+"I, alone, by my active tenderness, could have saved," she would exclaim,
+"from an early blight, this sweet blossom; and, cherishing it, I should
+have had something still to love."
+
+In proportion as other expectations were torn from her, this tender one
+had been fondly clung to, and knit into her heart.
+
+The books she had obtained, were soon devoured, by one who had no other
+resource to escape from sorrow, and the feverish dreams of ideal
+wretchedness or felicity, which equally weaken the intoxicated
+sensibility. Writing was then the only alternative, and she wrote some
+rhapsodies descriptive of the state of her mind; but the events of her
+past life pressing on her, she resolved circumstantially to relate them,
+with the sentiments that experience, and more matured reason, would
+naturally suggest. They might perhaps instruct her daughter, and shield
+her from the misery, the tyranny, her mother knew not how to avoid.
+
+This thought gave life to her diction, her soul flowed into it, and she
+soon found the task of recollecting almost obliterated impressions very
+interesting. She lived again in the revived emotions of youth, and
+forgot her present in the retrospect of sorrows that had assumed an
+unalterable character.
+
+Though this employment lightened the weight of time, yet, never losing
+sight of her main object, Maria did not allow any opportunity to slip of
+winning on the affections of Jemima; for she discovered in her a strength
+of mind, that excited her esteem, clouded as it was by the misanthropy of
+despair.
+
+An insulated being, from the misfortune of her birth, she despised and
+preyed on the society by which she had been oppressed, and loved not her
+fellow-creatures, because she had never been beloved. No mother had ever
+fondled her, no father or brother had protected her from outrage; and the
+man who had plunged her into infamy, and deserted her when she stood in
+greatest need of support, deigned not to smooth with kindness the road to
+ruin. Thus degraded, was she let loose on the world; and virtue, never
+nurtured by affection, assumed the stern aspect of selfish independence.
+
+This general view of her life, Maria gathered from her exclamations and
+dry remarks. Jemima indeed displayed a strange mixture of interest and
+suspicion; for she would listen to her with earnestness, and then
+suddenly interrupt the conversation, as if afraid of resigning, by giving
+way to her sympathy, her dear-bought knowledge of the world.
+
+Maria alluded to the possibility of an escape, and mentioned a
+compensation, or reward; but the style in which she was repulsed made her
+cautious, and determine not to renew the subject, till she knew more of
+the character she had to work on. Jemima's countenance, and dark hints,
+seemed to say, "You are an extraordinary woman; but let me consider, this
+may only be one of your lucid intervals." Nay, the very energy of Maria's
+character, made her suspect that the extraordinary animation she
+perceived might be the effect of madness. "Should her husband then
+substantiate his charge, and get possession of her estate, from whence
+would come the promised annuity, or more desired protection? Besides,
+might not a woman, anxious to escape, conceal some of the circumstances
+which made against her? Was truth to be expected from one who had been
+entrapped, kidnapped, in the most fraudulent manner?"
+
+In this train Jemima continued to argue, the moment after compassion and
+respect seemed to make her swerve; and she still resolved not to be
+wrought on to do more than soften the rigour of confinement, till she
+could advance on surer ground.
+
+Maria was not permitted to walk in the garden; but sometimes, from her
+window, she turned her eyes from the gloomy walls, in which she pined
+life away, on the poor wretches who strayed along the walks, and
+contemplated the most terrific of ruins--that of a human soul. What is
+the view of the fallen column, the mouldering arch, of the most exquisite
+workmanship, when compared with this living memento of the fragility, the
+instability, of reason, and the wild luxuriancy of noxious passions?
+Enthusiasm turned adrift, like some rich stream overflowing its banks,
+rushes forward with destructive velocity, inspiring a sublime
+concentration of thought. Thus thought Maria--These are the ravages over
+which humanity must ever mournfully ponder, with a degree of anguish not
+excited by crumbling marble, or cankering brass, unfaithful to the trust
+of monumental fame. It is not over the decaying productions of the mind,
+embodied with the happiest art, we grieve most bitterly. The view of what
+has been done by man, produces a melancholy, yet aggrandizing, sense of
+what remains to be achieved by human intellect; but a mental convulsion,
+which, like the devastation of an earthquake, throws all the elements of
+thought and imagination into confusion, makes contemplation giddy, and
+we fearfully ask on what ground we ourselves stand.
+
+Melancholy and imbecility marked the features of the wretches allowed to
+breathe at large; for the frantic, those who in a strong imagination had
+lost a sense of woe, were closely confined. The playful tricks and
+mischievous devices of their disturbed fancy, that suddenly broke out,
+could not be guarded against, when they were permitted to enjoy any
+portion of freedom; for, so active was their imagination, that every new
+object which accidentally struck their senses, awoke to phrenzy their
+restless passions; as Maria learned from the burden of their incessant
+ravings.
+
+Sometimes, with a strict injunction of silence, Jemima would allow
+Maria, at the close of evening, to stray along the narrow avenues that
+separated the dungeon-like apartments, leaning on her arm. What a change
+of scene! Maria wished to pass the threshold of her prison, yet, when by
+chance she met the eye of rage glaring on her, yet unfaithful to its
+office, she shrunk back with more horror and affright, than if she had
+stumbled over a mangled corpse. Her busy fancy pictured the misery of a
+fond heart, watching over a friend thus estranged, absent, though
+present--over a poor wretch lost to reason and the social joys of
+existence; and losing all consciousness of misery in its excess. What a
+task, to watch the light of reason quivering in the eye, or with
+agonizing expectation to catch the beam of recollection; tantalized by
+hope, only to feel despair more keenly, at finding a much loved face or
+voice, suddenly remembered, or pathetically implored, only to be
+immediately forgotten, or viewed with indifference or abhorrence!
+
+The heart-rending sigh of melancholy sunk into her soul; and when she
+retired to rest, the petrified figures she had encountered, the only
+human forms she was doomed to observe, haunting her dreams with tales of
+mysterious wrongs, made her wish to sleep to dream no more.
+
+Day after day rolled away, and tedious as the present moment appeared,
+they passed in such an unvaried tenor, Maria was surprised to find that
+she had already been six weeks buried alive, and yet had such faint hopes
+of effecting her enlargement. She was, earnestly as she had sought for
+employment, now angry with herself for having been amused by writing her
+narrative; and grieved to think that she had for an instant thought of
+any thing, but contriving to escape.
+
+Jemima had evidently pleasure in her society: still, though she often
+left her with a glow of kindness, she returned with the same chilling
+air; and, when her heart appeared for a moment to open, some suggestion
+of reason forcibly closed it, before she could give utterance to the
+confidence Maria's conversation inspired.
+
+Discouraged by these changes, Maria relapsed into despondency, when she
+was cheered by the alacrity with which Jemima brought her a fresh parcel
+of books; assuring her, that she had taken some pains to obtain them from
+one of the keepers, who attended a gentleman confined in the opposite
+corner of the gallery.
+
+Maria took up the books with emotion. "They come," said she, "perhaps,
+from a wretch condemned, like me, to reason on the nature of madness, by
+having wrecked minds continually under his eye; and almost to wish
+himself--as I do--mad, to escape from the contemplation of it." Her heart
+throbbed with sympathetic alarm; and she turned over the leaves with awe,
+as if they had become sacred from passing through the hands of an
+unfortunate being, oppressed by a similar fate.
+
+Dryden's Fables, Milton's Paradise Lost, with several modern productions,
+composed the collection. It was a mine of treasure. Some marginal notes,
+in Dryden's Fables, caught her attention: they were written with force
+and taste; and, in one of the modern pamphlets, there was a fragment
+left, containing various observations on the present state of society and
+government, with a comparative view of the politics of Europe and
+America. These remarks were written with a degree of generous warmth,
+when alluding to the enslaved state of the labouring majority, perfectly
+in unison with Maria's mode of thinking.
+
+She read them over and over again; and fancy, treacherous fancy, began to
+sketch a character, congenial with her own, from these shadowy
+outlines.--"Was he mad?" She re-perused the marginal notes, and they
+seemed the production of an animated, but not of a disturbed imagination.
+Confined to this speculation, every time she re-read them, some fresh
+refinement of sentiment, or acuteness of thought impressed her, which
+she was astonished at herself for not having before observed.
+
+What a creative power has an affectionate heart! There are beings who
+cannot live without loving, as poets love; and who feel the electric
+spark of genius, wherever it awakens sentiment or grace. Maria had often
+thought, when disciplining her wayward heart, "that to charm, was to be
+virtuous." "They who make me wish to appear the most amiable and good in
+their eyes, must possess in a degree," she would exclaim, "the graces and
+virtues they call into action."
+
+She took up a book on the powers of the human mind; but, her attention
+strayed from cold arguments on the nature of what she felt, while she
+was feeling, and she snapt the chain of the theory to read Dryden's
+Guiscard and Sigismunda.
+
+Maria, in the course of the ensuing day, returned some of the books, with
+the hope of getting others--and more marginal notes. Thus shut out from
+human intercourse, and compelled to view nothing but the prison of vexed
+spirits, to meet a wretch in the same situation, was more surely to find
+a friend, than to imagine a countryman one, in a strange land, where the
+human voice conveys no information to the eager ear.
+
+"Did you ever see the unfortunate being to whom these books belong?"
+asked Maria, when Jemima brought her supper. "Yes. He sometimes walks
+out, between five and six, before the family is stirring, in the
+morning, with two keepers; but even then his hands are confined."
+
+"What! is he so unruly?" enquired Maria, with an accent of
+disappointment.
+
+"No, not that I perceive," replied Jemima; "but he has an untamed look, a
+vehemence of eye, that excites apprehension. Were his hands free, he
+looks as if he could soon manage both his guards: yet he appears
+tranquil."
+
+"If he be so strong, he must be young," observed Maria.
+
+"Three or four and thirty, I suppose; but there is no judging of a person
+in his situation."
+
+"Are you sure that he is mad?" interrupted Maria with eagerness. Jemima
+quitted the room, without replying.
+
+"No, no, he certainly is not!" exclaimed Maria, answering herself; "the
+man who could write those observations was not disordered in his
+intellects."
+
+She sat musing, gazing at the moon, and watching its motion as it seemed
+to glide under the clouds. Then, preparing for bed, she thought, "Of what
+use could I be to him, or he to me, if it be true that he is unjustly
+confined?--Could he aid me to escape, who is himself more closely
+watched?--Still I should like to see him." She went to bed, dreamed of
+her child, yet woke exactly at half after five o'clock, and starting up,
+only wrapped a gown around her, and ran to the window. The morning was
+chill, it was the latter end of September; yet she did not retire to warm
+herself and think in bed, till the sound of the servants, moving about
+the house, convinced her that the unknown would not walk in the garden
+that morning. She was ashamed at feeling disappointed; and began to
+reflect, as an excuse to herself, on the little objects which attract
+attention when there is nothing to divert the mind; and how difficult it
+was for women to avoid growing romantic, who have no active duties or
+pursuits.
+
+At breakfast, Jemima enquired whether she understood French? for, unless
+she did, the stranger's stock of books was exhausted. Maria replied in
+the affirmative; but forbore to ask any more questions respecting the
+person to whom they belonged. And Jemima gave her a new subject for
+contemplation, by describing the person of a lovely maniac, just brought
+into an adjoining chamber. She was singing the pathetic ballad of old Rob
+                 with the most heart-melting falls and pauses. Jemima had
+half-opened the door, when she distinguished her voice, and Maria stood
+close to it, scarcely daring to respire, lest a modulation should escape
+her, so exquisitely sweet, so passionately wild. She began with sympathy
+to pourtray to herself another victim, when the lovely warbler flew, as
+it were, from the spray, and a torrent of unconnected exclamations and
+questions burst from her, interrupted by fits of laughter, so horrid,
+that Maria shut the door, and, turning her eyes up to heaven,
+exclaimed--"Gracious God!"
+
+Several minutes elapsed before Maria could enquire respecting the rumour
+of the house (for this poor wretch was obviously not confined without a
+cause); and then Jemima could only tell her, that it was said, "she had
+been married, against her inclination, to a rich old man, extremely
+jealous (no wonder, for she was a charming creature); and that, in
+consequence of his treatment, or something which hung on her mind, she
+had, during her first lying-in, lost her senses."
+
+What a subject of meditation--even to the very confines of madness.
+
+"Woman, fragile flower! why were you suffered to adorn a world exposed to
+the inroad of such stormy elements?" thought Maria, while the poor
+maniac's strain was still breathing on her ear, and sinking into her very
+soul.
+
+Towards the evening, Jemima brought her Rousseau's _Heloïse_; and she sat
+reading with eyes and heart, till the return of her guard to extinguish
+the light. One instance of her kindness was, the permitting Maria to have
+one, till her own hour of retiring to rest. She had read this work long
+since; but now it seemed to open a new world to her--the only one worth
+inhabiting. Sleep was not to be wooed; yet, far from being fatigued by
+the restless rotation of thought, she rose and opened her window, just as
+the thin watery clouds of twilight made the long silent shadows visible.
+The air swept across her face with a voluptuous freshness that thrilled
+to her heart, awakening indefinable emotions; and the sound of a waving
+branch, or the twittering of a startled bird, alone broke the stillness
+of reposing nature. Absorbed by the sublime sensibility which renders the
+consciousness of existence felicity, Maria was happy, till an autumnal
+scent, wafted by the breeze of morn from the fallen leaves of the
+adjacent wood, made her recollect that the season had changed since her
+confinement; yet life afforded no variety to solace an afflicted heart.
+She returned dispirited to her couch, and thought of her child till the
+broad glare of day again invited her to the window. She looked not for
+the unknown, still how great was her vexation at perceiving the back of a
+man, certainly he, with his two attendants, as he turned into a side-path
+which led to the house! A confused recollection of having seen somebody
+who resembled him, immediately occurred, to puzzle and torment her with
+endless conjectures. Five minutes sooner, and she should have seen his
+face, and been out of suspense--was ever any thing so unlucky! His
+steady, bold step, and the whole air of his person, bursting as it were
+from a cloud, pleased her, and gave an outline to the imagination to
+sketch the individual form she wished to recognize.
+
+Feeling the disappointment more severely than she was willing to believe,
+she flew to Rousseau, as her only refuge from the idea of him, who might
+prove a friend, could she but find a way to interest him in her fate;
+still the personification of Saint Preux, or of an ideal lover far
+superior, was after this imperfect model, of which merely a glance had
+been caught, even to the minutiæ of the coat and hat of the stranger.
+But if she lent St. Preux, or the demi-god of her fancy, his form, she
+richly repaid him by the donation of all St. Preux's sentiments and
+feelings, culled to gratify her own, to which he seemed to have an
+undoubted right, when she read on the margin of an impassioned letter,
+written in the well-known hand--"Rousseau alone, the true Prometheus of
+sentiment, possessed the fire of genius necessary to pourtray the
+passion, the truth of which goes so directly to the heart."
+
+Maria was again true to the hour, yet had finished Rousseau, and begun to
+transcribe some selected passages; unable to quit either the author or
+the window, before she had a glimpse of the countenance she daily longed
+to see; and, when seen, it conveyed no distinct idea to her mind where
+she had seen it before. He must have been a transient acquaintance; but
+to discover an acquaintance was fortunate, could she contrive to attract
+his attention, and excite his sympathy.
+
+Every glance afforded colouring for the picture she was delineating on
+her heart; and once, when the window was half open, the sound of his
+voice reached her. Conviction flashed on her; she had certainly, in a
+moment of distress, heard the same accents. They were manly, and
+characteristic of a noble mind; nay, even sweet--or sweet they seemed to
+her attentive ear.
+
+She started back, trembling, alarmed at the emotion a strange coincidence
+of circumstances inspired, and wondering why she thought so much of a
+stranger, obliged as she had been by his timely interference; [for she
+recollected, by degrees, all the circumstances of their former meeting.]
+She found however that she could think of nothing else; or, if she
+thought of her daughter, it was to wish that she had a father whom her
+mother could respect and love.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. III.
+
+
+WHEN perusing the first parcel of books, Maria had, with her pencil,
+written in one of them a few exclamations, expressive of compassion and
+sympathy, which she scarcely remembered, till turning over the leaves of
+one of the volumes, lately brought to her, a slip of paper dropped out,
+which Jemima hastily snatched up.
+
+"Let me see it," demanded Maria impatiently, "You surely are not afraid
+of trusting me with the effusions of a madman?" "I must consider,"
+replied Jemima; and withdrew, with the paper in her hand.
+
+In a life of such seclusion, the passions gain undue force; Maria
+therefore felt a great degree of resentment and vexation, which she had
+not time to subdue, before Jemima, returning, delivered the paper.
+
+     "Whoever you are, who partake of my fate, accept my sincere
+     commiseration--I would have said protection; but the privilege of
+     man is denied me.
+
+     "My own situation forces a dreadful suspicion on my mind--I may
+     not always languish in vain for freedom--say are you--I cannot
+     ask the question; yet I will remember you when my remembrance can
+     be of any use. I will enquire, _why_ you are so mysteriously
+     detained--and I _will_ have an answer.
+
+     "HENRY DARNFORD."
+
+By the most pressing intreaties, Maria prevailed on Jemima to permit her
+to write a reply to this note. Another and another succeeded, in which
+explanations were not allowed relative to their present situation; but
+Maria, with sufficient explicitness, alluded to a former obligation; and
+they insensibly entered on an interchange of sentiments on the most
+important subjects. To write these letters was the business of the day,
+and to receive them the moment of sunshine. By some means, Darnford
+having discovered Maria's window, when she next appeared at it, he made
+her, behind his keepers, a profound bow of respect and recognition.
+
+Two or three weeks glided away in this kind of intercourse, during which
+period Jemima, to whom Maria had given the necessary information
+respecting her family, had evidently gained some intelligence, which
+increased her desire of pleasing her charge, though she could not yet
+determine to liberate her. Maria took advantage of this favourable
+charge, without too minutely enquiring into the cause; and such was her
+eagerness to hold human converse, and to see her former protector, still
+a stranger to her, that she incessantly requested her guard to gratify
+her more than curiosity.
+
+Writing to Darnford, she was led from the sad objects before her, and
+frequently rendered insensible to the horrid noises around her, which
+previously had continually employed her feverish fancy. Thinking it
+selfish to dwell on her own sufferings, when in the midst of wretches,
+who had not only lost all that endears life, but their very selves, her
+imagination was occupied with melancholy earnestness to trace the mazes
+of misery, through which so many wretches must have passed to this gloomy
+receptacle of disjointed souls, to the grand source of human corruption.
+Often at midnight was she waked by the dismal shrieks of demoniac rage,
+or of excruciating despair, uttered in such wild tones of indescribable
+anguish as proved the total absence of reason, and roused phantoms of
+horror in her mind, far more terrific than all that dreaming superstition
+ever drew. Besides, there was frequently something so inconceivably
+picturesque in the varying gestures of unrestrained passion, so
+irresistibly comic in their sallies, or so heart-piercingly pathetic in
+the little airs they would sing, frequently bursting out after an awful
+silence, as to fascinate the attention, and amuse the fancy, while
+torturing the soul. It was the uproar of the passions which she was
+compelled to observe; and to mark the lucid beam of reason, like a light
+trembling in a socket, or like the flash which divides the threatening
+clouds of angry heaven only to display the horrors which darkness
+shrouded.
+
+Jemima would labour to beguile the tedious evenings, by describing the
+persons and manners of the unfortunate beings, whose figures or voices
+awoke sympathetic sorrow in Maria's bosom; and the stories she told were
+the more interesting, for perpetually leaving room to conjecture
+something extraordinary. Still Maria, accustomed to generalize her
+observations, was led to conclude from all she heard, that it was a
+vulgar error to suppose that people of abilities were the most apt to
+lose the command of reason. On the contrary, from most of the instances
+she could investigate, she thought it resulted, that the passions only
+appeared strong and disproportioned, because the judgment was weak and
+unexercised; and that they gained strength by the decay of reason, as the
+shadows lengthen during the sun's decline.
+
+Maria impatiently wished to see her fellow-sufferer; but Darnford was
+still more earnest to obtain an interview. Accustomed to submit to every
+impulse of passion, and never taught, like women, to restrain the most
+natural, and acquire, instead of the bewitching frankness of nature, a
+factitious propriety of behaviour, every desire became a torrent that
+bore down all opposition.
+
+His travelling trunk, which contained the books lent to Maria, had been
+sent to him, and with a part of its contents he bribed his principal
+keeper; who, after receiving the most solemn promise that he would return
+to his apartment without attempting to explore any part of the house,
+conducted him, in the dusk of the evening, to Maria's room.
+
+Jemima had apprized her charge of the visit, and she expected with
+trembling impatience, inspired by a vague hope that he might again prove
+her deliverer, to see a man who had before rescued her from oppression.
+He entered with an animation of countenance, formed to captivate an
+enthusiast; and, hastily turned his eyes from her to the apartment, which
+he surveyed with apparent emotions of compassionate indignation.
+Sympathy illuminated his eye, and, taking her hand, he respectfully bowed
+on it, exclaiming--"This is extraordinary!--again to meet you, and in
+such circumstances!" Still, impressive as was the coincidence of events
+which brought them once more together, their full hearts did not
+overflow.--[54-A]
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[And though, after this first visit, they were permitted frequently to
+repeat their interviews, they were for some time employed in] a reserved
+conversation, to which all the world might have listened; excepting,
+when discussing some literary subject, flashes of sentiment, inforced by
+each relaxing feature, seemed to remind them that their minds were
+already acquainted.
+
+[By degrees, Darnford entered into the particulars of his story.] In a
+few words, he informed her that he had been a thoughtless, extravagant
+young man; yet, as he described his faults, they appeared to be the
+generous luxuriancy of a noble mind. Nothing like meanness tarnished the
+lustre of his youth, nor had the worm of selfishness lurked in the
+unfolding bud, even while he had been the dupe of others. Yet he tardily
+acquired the experience necessary to guard him against future imposition.
+
+"I shall weary you," continued he, "by my egotism; and did not powerful
+emotions draw me to you,"--his eyes glistened as he spoke, and a
+trembling seemed to run through his manly frame,--"I would not waste
+these precious moments in talking of myself.
+
+"My father and mother were people of fashion; married by their parents.
+He was fond of the turf, she of the card-table. I, and two or three other
+children since dead, were kept at home till we became intolerable. My
+father and mother had a visible dislike to each other, continually
+displayed; the servants were of the depraved kind usually found in the
+houses of people of fortune. My brothers and parents all dying, I was
+left to the care of guardians, and sent to Eton. I never knew the sweets
+of domestic affection, but I felt the want of indulgence and frivolous
+respect at school. I will not disgust you with a recital of the vices of
+my youth, which can scarcely be comprehended by female delicacy. I was
+taught to love by a creature I am ashamed to mention; and the other women
+with whom I afterwards became intimate, were of a class of which you can
+have no knowledge. I formed my acquaintance with them at the theatres;
+and, when vivacity danced in their eyes, I was not easily disgusted by
+the vulgarity which flowed from their lips. Having spent, a few years
+after I was of age, [the whole of] a considerable patrimony, excepting a
+few hundreds, I had no recourse but to purchase a commission in a
+new-raised regiment, destined to subjugate America. The regret I felt to
+renounce a life of pleasure, was counter-balanced by the curiosity I had
+to see America, or rather to travel; [nor had any of those circumstances
+occurred to my youth, which might have been calculated] to bind my
+country to my heart. I shall not trouble you with the details of a
+military life. My blood was still kept in motion; till, towards the close
+of the contest, I was wounded and taken prisoner.
+
+"Confined to my bed, or chair, by a lingering cure, my only refuge from
+the preying activity of my mind, was books, which I read with great
+avidity, profiting by the conversation of my host, a man of sound
+understanding. My political sentiments now underwent a total change; and,
+dazzled by the hospitality of the Americans, I determined to take up my
+abode with freedom. I, therefore, with my usual impetuosity, sold my
+commission, and travelled into the interior parts of the country, to lay
+out my money to advantage. Added to this, I did not much like the
+puritanical manners of the large towns. Inequality of condition was there
+most disgustingly galling. The only pleasure wealth afforded, was to make
+an ostentatious display of it; for the cultivation of the fine arts, or
+literature, had not introduced into the first circles that polish of
+manners which renders the rich so essentially superior to the poor in
+Europe. Added to this, an influx of vices had been let in by the
+Revolution, and the most rigid principles of religion shaken to the
+centre, before the understanding could be gradually emancipated from the
+prejudices which led their ancestors undauntedly to seek an inhospitable
+clime and unbroken soil. The resolution, that led them, in pursuit of
+independence, to embark on rivers like seas, to search for unknown
+shores, and to sleep under the hovering mists of endless forests, whose
+baleful damps agued their limbs, was now turned into commercial
+speculations, till the national character exhibited a phenomenon in the
+history of the human mind--a head enthusiastically enterprising, with
+cold selfishness of heart. And woman, lovely woman!--they charm every
+where--still there is a degree of prudery, and a want of taste and ease
+in the manners of the American women, that renders them, in spite of
+their roses and lilies, far inferior to our European charmers. In the
+country, they have often a bewitching simplicity of character; but, in
+the cities, they have all the airs and ignorance of the ladies who give
+the tone to the circles of the large trading towns in England. They are
+fond of their ornaments, merely because they are good, and not because
+they embellish their persons; and are more gratified to inspire the women
+with jealousy of these exterior advantages, than the men with love. All
+the frivolity which often (excuse me, Madam) renders the society of
+modest women so stupid in England, here seemed to throw still more leaden
+fetters on their charms. Not being an adept in gallantry, I found that I
+could only keep myself awake in their company by making downright love to
+them.
+
+"But, not to intrude on your patience, I retired to the track of land
+which I had purchased in the country, and my time passed pleasantly
+enough while I cut down the trees, built my house, and planted my
+different crops. But winter and idleness came, and I longed for more
+elegant society, to hear what was passing in the world, and to do
+something better than vegetate with the animals that made a very
+considerable part of my household. Consequently, I determined to travel.
+Motion was a substitute for variety of objects; and, passing over immense
+tracks of country, I exhausted my exuberant spirits, without obtaining
+much experience. I every where saw industry the fore-runner and not the
+consequence, of luxury; but this country, every thing being on an ample
+scale, did not afford those picturesque views, which a certain degree of
+cultivation is necessary gradually to produce. The eye wandered without
+an object to fix upon over immeasureable plains, and lakes that seemed
+replenished by the ocean, whilst eternal forests of small clustering
+trees, obstructed the circulation of air, and embarrassed the path,
+without gratifying the eye of taste. No cottage smiling in the waste, no
+travellers hailed us, to give life to silent nature; or, if perchance we
+saw the print of a footstep in our path, it was a dreadful warning to
+turn aside; and the head ached as if assailed by the scalping knife. The
+Indians who hovered on the skirts of the European settlements had only
+learned of their neighbours to plunder, and they stole their guns from
+them to do it with more safety.
+
+"From the woods and back settlements, I returned to the towns, and
+learned to eat and drink most valiantly; but without entering into
+commerce (and I detested commerce) I found I could not live there; and,
+growing heartily weary of the land of liberty and vulgar aristocracy,
+seated on her bags of dollars, I resolved once more to visit Europe. I
+wrote to a distant relation in England, with whom I had been educated,
+mentioning the vessel in which I intended to sail. Arriving in London, my
+senses were intoxicated. I ran from street to street, from theatre to
+theatre, and the women of the town (again I must beg pardon for my
+habitual frankness) appeared to me like angels.
+
+"A week was spent in this thoughtless manner, when, returning very late
+to the hotel in which I had lodged ever since my arrival, I was knocked
+down in a private street, and hurried, in a state of insensibility, into
+a coach, which brought me hither, and I only recovered my senses to be
+treated like one who had lost them. My keepers are deaf to my
+remonstrances and enquiries, yet assure me that my confinement shall not
+last long. Still I cannot guess, though I weary myself with conjectures,
+why I am confined, or in what part of England this house is situated. I
+imagine sometimes that I hear the sea roar, and wished myself again on
+the Atlantic, till I had a glimpse of you[65-A]."
+
+A few moments were only allowed to Maria to comment on this narrative,
+when Darnford left her to her own thoughts, to the "never ending, still
+beginning," task of weighing his words, recollecting his tones of voice,
+and feeling them reverberate on her heart.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[54-A] The copy which had received the author's last corrections, breaks
+off in this place, and the pages which follow, to the end of Chap. IV,
+are printed from a copy in a less finished state.
+
+[65-A] The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer of Maria in a former
+instance, appears to have been an after-thought of the author. This has
+occasioned the omission of any allusion to that circumstance in the
+preceding narration.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. IV.
+
+
+PITY, and the forlorn seriousness of adversity, have both been considered
+as dispositions favourable to love, while satirical writers have
+attributed the propensity to the relaxing effect of idleness, what chance
+then had Maria of escaping, when pity, sorrow, and solitude all conspired
+to soften her mind, and nourish romantic wishes, and, from a natural
+progress, romantic expectations?
+
+Maria was six-and-twenty. But, such was the native soundness of her
+constitution, that time had only given to her countenance the character
+of her mind. Revolving thought, and exercised affections had banished
+some of the playful graces of innocence, producing insensibly that
+irregularity of features which the struggles of the understanding to
+trace or govern the strong emotions of the heart, are wont to imprint on
+the yielding mass. Grief and care had mellowed, without obscuring, the
+bright tints of youth, and the thoughtfulness which resided on her brow
+did not take from the feminine softness of her features; nay, such was
+the sensibility which often mantled over it, that she frequently
+appeared, like a large proportion of her sex, only born to feel; and the
+activity of her well-proportioned, and even almost voluptuous figure,
+inspired the idea of strength of mind, rather than of body. There was a
+simplicity sometimes indeed in her manner, which bordered on infantine
+ingenuousness, that led people of common discernment to underrate her
+talents, and smile at the flights of her imagination. But those who could
+not comprehend the delicacy of her sentiments, were attached by her
+unfailing sympathy, so that she was very generally beloved by characters
+of very different descriptions; still, she was too much under the
+influence of an ardent imagination to adhere to common rules.
+
+There are mistakes of conduct which at five-and-twenty prove the strength
+of the mind, that, ten or fifteen years after, would demonstrate its
+weakness, its incapacity to acquire a sane judgment. The youths who are
+satisfied with the ordinary pleasures of life, and do not sigh after
+ideal phantoms of love and friendship, will never arrive at great
+maturity of understanding; but if these reveries are cherished, as is too
+frequently the case with women, when experience ought to have taught
+them in what human happiness consists, they become as useless as they are
+wretched. Besides, their pains and pleasures are so dependent on outward
+circumstances, on the objects of their affections, that they seldom act
+from the impulse of a nerved mind, able to choose its own pursuit.
+
+Having had to struggle incessantly with the vices of mankind, Maria's
+imagination found repose in pourtraying the possible virtues the world
+might contain. Pygmalion formed an ivory maid, and longed for an
+informing soul. She, on the contrary, combined all the qualities of a
+hero's mind, and fate presented a statue in which she might enshrine
+them.
+
+We mean not to trace the progress of this passion, or recount how often
+Darnford and Maria were obliged to part in the midst of an interesting
+conversation. Jemima ever watched on the tip-toe of fear, and frequently
+separated them on a false alarm, when they would have given worlds to
+remain a little longer together.
+
+A magic lamp now seemed to be suspended in Maria's prison, and fairy
+landscapes flitted round the gloomy walls, late so blank. Rushing from
+the depth of despair, on the seraph wing of hope, she found herself
+happy.--She was beloved, and every emotion was rapturous.
+
+To Darnford she had not shown a decided affection; the fear of outrunning
+his, a sure proof of love, made her often assume a coldness and
+indifference foreign from her character; and, even when giving way to the
+playful emotions of a heart just loosened from the frozen bond of grief,
+there was a delicacy in her manner of expressing her sensibility, which
+made him doubt whether it was the effect of love.
+
+One evening, when Jemima left them, to listen to the sound of a distant
+footstep, which seemed cautiously to approach, he seized Maria's hand--it
+was not withdrawn. They conversed with earnestness of their situation;
+and, during the conversation, he once or twice gently drew her towards
+him. He felt the fragrance of her breath, and longed, yet feared, to
+touch the lips from which it issued; spirits of purity seemed to guard
+them, while all the enchanting graces of love sported on her cheeks, and
+languished in her eyes.
+
+Jemima entering, he reflected on his diffidence with poignant regret,
+and, she once more taking alarm, he ventured, as Maria stood near his
+chair, to approach her lips with a declaration of love. She drew back
+with solemnity, he hung down his head abashed; but lifting his eyes
+timidly, they met her's; she had determined, during that instant, and
+suffered their rays to mingle. He took, with more ardour, reassured, a
+half-consenting, half-reluctant kiss, reluctant only from modesty; and
+there was a sacredness in her dignified manner of reclining her glowing
+face on his shoulder, that powerfully impressed him. Desire was lost in
+more ineffable emotions, and to protect her from insult and sorrow--to
+make her happy, seemed not only the first wish of his heart, but the most
+noble duty of his life. Such angelic confidence demanded the fidelity of
+honour; but could he, feeling her in every pulsation, could he ever
+change, could he be a villain? The emotion with which she, for a moment,
+allowed herself to be pressed to his bosom, the tear of rapturous
+sympathy, mingled with a soft melancholy sentiment of recollected
+disappointment, said--more of truth and faithfulness, than the tongue
+could have given utterance to in hours! They were silent--yet discoursed,
+how eloquently? till, after a moment's reflection, Maria drew her chair
+by the side of his, and, with a composed sweetness of voice, and
+supernatural benignity of countenance, said, "I must open my whole heart
+to you; you must be told who I am, why I am here, and why, telling you I
+am a wife, I blush not to"--the blush spoke the rest.
+
+Jemima was again at her elbow, and the restraint of her presence did not
+prevent an animated conversation, in which love, sly urchin, was ever at
+bo-peep.
+
+So much of heaven did they enjoy, that paradise bloomed around them; or
+they, by a powerful spell, had been transported into Armida's garden.
+Love, the grand enchanter, "lapt them in Elysium," and every sense was
+harmonized to joy and social extacy. So animated, indeed, were their
+accents of tenderness, in discussing what, in other circumstances, would
+have been common-place subjects, that Jemima felt, with surprise, a tear
+of pleasure trickling down her rugged cheeks. She wiped it away, half
+ashamed; and when Maria kindly enquired the cause, with all the eager
+solicitude of a happy being wishing to impart to all nature its
+overflowing felicity, Jemima owned that it was the first tear that social
+enjoyment had ever drawn from her. She seemed indeed to breathe more
+freely; the cloud of suspicion cleared away from her brow; she felt
+herself, for once in her life, treated like a fellow-creature.
+
+Imagination! who can paint thy power; or reflect the evanescent tints of
+hope fostered by thee? A despondent gloom had long obscured Maria's
+horizon--now the sun broke forth, the rainbow appeared, and every
+prospect was fair. Horror still reigned in the darkened cells, suspicion
+lurked in the passages, and whispered along the walls. The yells of men
+possessed, sometimes made them pause, and wonder that they felt so happy,
+in a tomb of living death. They even chid themselves for such apparent
+insensibility; still the world contained not three happier beings. And
+Jemima, after again patrolling the passage, was so softened by the air of
+confidence which breathed around her, that she voluntarily began an
+account of herself.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. V.
+
+
+"MY father," said Jemima, "seduced my mother, a pretty girl, with whom he
+lived fellow-servant; and she no sooner perceived the natural, the
+dreaded consequence, than the terrible conviction flashed on her--that
+she was ruined. Honesty, and a regard for her reputation, had been the
+only principles inculcated by her mother; and they had been so forcibly
+impressed, that she feared shame, more than the poverty to which it would
+lead. Her incessant importunities to prevail upon my father to screen her
+from reproach by marrying her, as he had promised in the fervour of
+seduction, estranged him from her so completely, that her very person
+became distasteful to him; and he began to hate, as well as despise me,
+before I was born.
+
+"My mother, grieved to the soul by his neglect, and unkind treatment,
+actually resolved to famish herself; and injured her health by the
+attempt; though she had not sufficient resolution to adhere to her
+project, or renounce it entirely. Death came not at her call; yet sorrow,
+and the methods she adopted to conceal her condition, still doing the
+work of a house-maid, had such an effect on her constitution, that she
+died in the wretched garret, where her virtuous mistress had forced her
+to take refuge in the very pangs of labour, though my father, after a
+slight reproof, was allowed to remain in his place--allowed by the mother
+of six children, who, scarcely permitting a footstep to be heard, during
+her month's indulgence, felt no sympathy for the poor wretch, denied
+every comfort required by her situation.
+
+"The day my mother died, the ninth after my birth, I was consigned to the
+care of the cheapest nurse my father could find; who suckled her own
+child at the same time, and lodged as many more as she could get, in two
+cellar-like apartments.
+
+"Poverty, and the habit of seeing children die off her hands, had so
+hardened her heart, that the office of a mother did not awaken the
+tenderness of a woman; nor were the feminine caresses which seem a part
+of the rearing of a child, ever bestowed on me. The chicken has a wing to
+shelter under; but I had no bosom to nestle in, no kindred warmth to
+foster me. Left in dirt, to cry with cold and hunger till I was weary,
+and sleep without ever being prepared by exercise, or lulled by kindness
+to rest; could I be expected to become any thing but a weak and rickety
+babe? Still, in spite of neglect, I continued to exist, to learn to curse
+existence," her countenance grew ferocious as she spoke, "and the
+treatment that rendered me miserable, seemed to sharpen my wits. Confined
+then in a damp hovel, to rock the cradle of the succeeding tribe, I
+looked like a little old woman, or a hag shrivelling into nothing. The
+furrows of reflection and care contracted the youthful cheek, and gave a
+sort of supernatural wildness to the ever watchful eye. During this
+period, my father had married another fellow-servant, who loved him less,
+and knew better how to manage his passion, than my mother. She likewise
+proving with child, they agreed to keep a shop: my step-mother, if, being
+an illegitimate offspring, I may venture thus to characterize her, having
+obtained a sum of a rich relation, for that purpose.
+
+"Soon after her lying-in, she prevailed on my father to take me home, to
+save the expence of maintaining me, and of hiring a girl to assist her in
+the care of the child. I was young, it was true, but appeared a knowing
+little thing, and might be made handy. Accordingly I was brought to her
+house; but not to a home--for a home I never knew. Of this child, a
+daughter, she was extravagantly fond; and it was a part of my employment,
+to assist to spoil her, by humouring all her whims, and bearing all her
+caprices. Feeling her own consequence, before she could speak, she had
+learned the art of tormenting me, and if I ever dared to resist, I
+received blows, laid on with no compunctious hand, or was sent to bed
+dinnerless, as well as supperless. I said that it was a part of my daily
+labour to attend this child, with the servility of a slave; still it was
+but a part. I was sent out in all seasons, and from place to place, to
+carry burdens far above my strength, without being allowed to draw near
+the fire, or ever being cheered by encouragement or kindness. No wonder
+then, treated like a creature of another species, that I began to envy,
+and at length to hate, the darling of the house. Yet, I perfectly
+remember, that it was the caresses, and kind expressions of my
+step-mother, which first excited my jealous discontent. Once, I cannot
+forget it, when she was calling in vain her wayward child to kiss her, I
+ran to her, saying, 'I will kiss you, ma'am!' and how did my heart, which
+was in my mouth, sink, what was my debasement of soul, when pushed away
+with--'I do not want you, pert thing!' Another day, when a new gown had
+excited the highest good humour, and she uttered the appropriate _dear_,
+addressed unexpectedly to me, I thought I could never do enough to please
+her; I was all alacrity, and rose proportionably in my own estimation.
+
+"As her daughter grew up, she was pampered with cakes and fruit, while I
+was, literally speaking, fed with the refuse of the table, with her
+leavings. A liquorish tooth is, I believe, common to children, and I used
+to steal any thing sweet, that I could catch up with a chance of
+concealment. When detected, she was not content to chastize me herself at
+the moment, but, on my father's return in the evening (he was a shopman),
+the principal discourse was to recount my faults, and attribute them to
+the wicked disposition which I had brought into the world with me,
+inherited from my mother. He did not fail to leave the marks of his
+resentment on my body, and then solaced himself by playing with my
+sister.--I could have murdered her at those moments. To save myself from
+these unmerciful corrections, I resorted to falshood, and the untruths
+which I sturdily maintained, were brought in judgment against me, to
+support my tyrant's inhuman charge of my natural propensity to vice.
+Seeing me treated with contempt, and always being fed and dressed
+better, my sister conceived a contemptuous opinion of me, that proved an
+obstacle to all affection; and my father, hearing continually of my
+faults, began to consider me as a curse entailed on him for his sins: he
+was therefore easily prevailed on to bind me apprentice to one of my
+step-mother's friends, who kept a slop-shop in Wapping. I was represented
+(as it was said) in my true colours; but she, 'warranted,' snapping her
+fingers, 'that she should break my spirit or heart.'
+
+"My mother replied, with a whine, 'that if any body could make me better,
+it was such a clever woman as herself; though, for her own part, she had
+tried in vain; but good-nature was her fault.'
+
+"I shudder with horror, when I recollect the treatment I had now to
+endure. Not only under the lash of my task-mistress, but the drudge of
+the maid, apprentices and children, I never had a taste of human kindness
+to soften the rigour of perpetual labour. I had been introduced as an
+object of abhorrence into the family; as a creature of whom my
+step-mother, though she had been kind enough to let me live in the house
+with her own child, could make nothing. I was described as a wretch,
+whose nose must be kept to the grinding stone--and it was held there with
+an iron grasp. It seemed indeed the privilege of their superior nature to
+kick me about, like the dog or cat. If I were attentive, I was called
+fawning, if refractory, an obstinate mule, and like a mule I received
+their censure on my loaded back. Often has my mistress, for some
+instance of forgetfulness, thrown me from one side of the kitchen to the
+other, knocked my head against the wall, spit in my face, with various
+refinements on barbarity that I forbear to enumerate, though they were
+all acted over again by the servant, with additional insults, to which
+the appellation of _bastard_, was commonly added, with taunts or sneers.
+But I will not attempt to give you an adequate idea of my situation, lest
+you, who probably have never been drenched with the dregs of human
+misery, should think I exaggerate.
+
+"I stole now, from absolute necessity,--bread; yet whatever else was
+taken, which I had it not in my power to take, was ascribed to me. I was
+the filching cat, the ravenous dog, the dumb brute, who must bear all;
+for if I endeavoured to exculpate myself, I was silenced, without any
+enquiries being made, with 'Hold your tongue, you never tell truth.' Even
+the very air I breathed was tainted with scorn; for I was sent to the
+neighbouring shops with Glutton, Liar, or Thief, written on my forehead.
+This was, at first, the most bitter punishment; but sullen pride, or a
+kind of stupid desperation, made me, at length, almost regardless of the
+contempt, which had wrung from me so many solitary tears at the only
+moments when I was allowed to rest.
+
+"Thus was I the mark of cruelty till my sixteenth year; and then I have
+only to point out a change of misery; for a period I never knew. Allow me
+first to make one observation. Now I look back, I cannot help
+attributing the greater part of my misery, to the misfortune of having
+been thrown into the world without the grand support of life--a mother's
+affection. I had no one to love me; or to make me respected, to enable me
+to acquire respect. I was an egg dropped on the sand; a pauper by nature,
+shunted from family to family, who belonged to nobody--and nobody cared
+for me. I was despised from my birth, and denied the chance of obtaining
+a footing for myself in society. Yes; I had not even the chance of being
+considered as a fellow-creature--yet all the people with whom I lived,
+brutalized as they were by the low cunning of trade, and the despicable
+shifts of poverty, were not without bowels, though they never yearned for
+me. I was, in fact, born a slave, and chained by infamy to slavery
+during the whole of existence, without having any companions to alleviate
+it by sympathy, or teach me how to rise above it by their example. But,
+to resume the thread of my tale--
+
+"At sixteen, I suddenly grew tall, and something like comeliness appeared
+on a Sunday, when I had time to wash my face, and put on clean clothes.
+My master had once or twice caught hold of me in the passage; but I
+instinctively avoided his disgusting caresses. One day however, when the
+family were at a methodist meeting, he contrived to be alone in the house
+with me, and by blows--yes; blows and menaces, compelled me to submit to
+his ferocious desire; and, to avoid my mistress's fury, I was obliged in
+future to comply, and skulk to my loft at his command, in spite of
+increasing loathing.
+
+"The anguish which was now pent up in my bosom, seemed to open a new
+world to me: I began to extend my thoughts beyond myself, and grieve for
+human misery, till I discovered, with horror--ah! what horror!--that I
+was with child. I know not why I felt a mixed sensation of despair and
+tenderness, excepting that, ever called a bastard, a bastard appeared to
+me an object of the greatest compassion in creation.
+
+"I communicated this dreadful circumstance to my master, who was almost
+equally alarmed at the intelligence; for he feared his wife, and public
+censure at the meeting. After some weeks of deliberation had elapsed, I
+in continual fear that my altered shape would be noticed, my master gave
+me a medicine in a phial, which he desired me to take, telling me,
+without any circumlocution, for what purpose it was designed. I burst
+into tears, I thought it was killing myself--yet was such a self as I
+worth preserving? He cursed me for a fool, and left me to my own
+reflections. I could not resolve to take this infernal potion; but I
+wrapped it up in an old gown, and hid it in a corner of my box.
+
+"Nobody yet suspected me, because they had been accustomed to view me as
+a creature of another species. But the threatening storm at last broke
+over my devoted head--never shall I forget it! One Sunday evening when I
+was left, as usual, to take care of the house, my master came home
+intoxicated, and I became the prey of his brutal appetite. His extreme
+intoxication made him forget his customary caution, and my mistress
+entered and found us in a situation that could not have been more hateful
+to her than me. Her husband was 'pot-valiant,' he feared her not at the
+moment, nor had he then much reason, for she instantly turned the whole
+force of her anger another way. She tore off my cap, scratched, kicked,
+and buffetted me, till she had exhausted her strength, declaring, as she
+rested her arm, 'that I had wheedled her husband from her.--But, could
+any thing better be expected from a wretch, whom she had taken into her
+house out of pure charity?' What a torrent of abuse rushed out? till,
+almost breathless, she concluded with saying, 'that I was born a
+strumpet; it ran in my blood, and nothing good could come to those who
+harboured me.'
+
+"My situation was, of course, discovered, and she declared that I should
+not stay another night under the same roof with an honest family. I was
+therefore pushed out of doors, and my trumpery thrown after me, when it
+had been contemptuously examined in the passage, lest I should have
+stolen any thing.
+
+"Behold me then in the street, utterly destitute! Whither could I creep
+for shelter? To my father's roof I had no claim, when not pursued by
+shame--now I shrunk back as from death, from my mother's cruel
+reproaches, my father's execrations. I could not endure to hear him curse
+the day I was born, though life had been a curse to me. Of death I
+thought, but with a confused emotion of terror, as I stood leaning my
+head on a post, and starting at every footstep, lest it should be my
+mistress coming to tear my heart out. One of the boys of the shop passing
+by, heard my tale, and immediately repaired to his master, to give him a
+description of my situation; and he touched the right key--the scandal it
+would give rise to, if I were left to repeat my tale to every enquirer.
+This plea came home to his reason, who had been sobered by his wife's
+rage, the fury of which fell on him when I was out of her reach, and he
+sent the boy to me with half-a-guinea, desiring him to conduct me to a
+house, where beggars, and other wretches, the refuse of society, nightly
+lodged.
+
+"This night was spent in a state of stupefaction, or desperation. I
+detested mankind, and abhorred myself.
+
+"In the morning I ventured out, to throw myself in my master's way, at
+his usual hour of going abroad. I approached him, he 'damned me for a
+b----, declared I had disturbed the peace of the family, and that he had
+sworn to his wife, never to take any more notice of me.' He left me; but,
+instantly returning, he told me that he should speak to his friend, a
+parish-officer, to get a nurse for the brat I laid to him; and advised
+me, if I wished to keep out of the house of correction, not to make free
+with his name.
+
+"I hurried back to my hole, and, rage giving place to despair, sought for
+the potion that was to procure abortion, and swallowed it, with a wish
+that it might destroy me, at the same time that it stopped the sensations
+of new-born life, which I felt with indescribable emotion. My head
+turned round, my heart grew sick, and in the horrors of approaching
+dissolution, mental anguish was swallowed up. The effect of the medicine
+was violent, and I was confined to my bed several days; but, youth and a
+strong constitution prevailing, I once more crawled out, to ask myself
+the cruel question, 'Whither I should go?' I had but two shillings left
+in my pocket, the rest had been expended, by a poor woman who slept in
+the same room, to pay for my lodging, and purchase the necessaries of
+which she partook.
+
+"With this wretch I went into the neighbouring streets to beg, and my
+disconsolate appearance drew a few pence from the idle, enabling me still
+to command a bed; till, recovering from my illness, and taught to put on
+my rags to the best advantage, I was accosted from different motives, and
+yielded to the desire of the brutes I met, with the same detestation that
+I had felt for my still more brutal master. I have since read in novels
+of the blandishments of seduction, but I had not even the pleasure of
+being enticed into vice.
+
+"I shall not," interrupted Jemima, "lead your imagination into all the
+scenes of wretchedness and depravity, which I was condemned to view; or
+mark the different stages of my debasing misery. Fate dragged me through
+the very kennels of society; I was still a slave, a bastard, a common
+property. Become familiar with vice, for I wish to conceal nothing from
+you, I picked the pockets of the drunkards who abused me; and proved by
+my conduct, that I deserved the epithets, with which they loaded me at
+moments when distrust ought to cease.
+
+"Detesting my nightly occupation, though valuing, if I may so use the
+word, my independence, which only consisted in choosing the street in
+which I should wander, or the roof, when I had money, in which I should
+hide my head, I was some time before I could prevail on myself to accept
+of a place in a house of ill fame, to which a girl, with whom I had
+accidentally conversed in the street, had recommended me. I had been
+hunted almost into a a fever, by the watchmen of the quarter of the town
+I frequented; one, whom I had unwittingly offended, giving the word to
+the whole pack. You can scarcely conceive the tyranny exercised by these
+wretches: considering themselves as the instruments of the very laws they
+violate, the pretext which steels their conscience, hardens their heart.
+Not content with receiving from us, outlaws of society (let other women
+talk of favours) a brutal gratification gratuitously as a privilege of
+office, they extort a tithe of prostitution, and harrass with threats the
+poor creatures whose occupation affords not the means to silence the
+growl of avarice. To escape from this persecution, I once more entered
+into servitude.
+
+"A life of comparative regularity restored my health; and--do not
+start--my manners were improved, in a situation where vice sought to
+render itself alluring, and taste was cultivated to fashion the person,
+if not to refine the mind. Besides, the common civility of speech,
+contrasted with the gross vulgarity to which I had been accustomed, was
+something like the polish of civilization. I was not shut out from all
+intercourse of humanity. Still I was galled by the yoke of service, and
+my mistress often flying into violent fits of passion, made me dread a
+sudden dismission, which I understood was always the case. I was
+therefore prevailed on, though I felt a horror of men, to accept the
+offer of a gentleman, rather in the decline of years, to keep his house,
+pleasantly situated in a little village near Hampstead.
+
+"He was a man of great talents, and of brilliant wit; but, a worn-out
+votary of voluptuousness, his desires became fastidious in proportion as
+they grew weak, and the native tenderness of his heart was undermined by
+a vitiated imagination. A thoughtless career of libertinism and social
+enjoyment, had injured his health to such a degree, that, whatever
+pleasure his conversation afforded me (and my esteem was ensured by
+proofs of the generous humanity of his disposition), the being his
+mistress was purchasing it at a very dear rate. With such a keen
+perception of the delicacies of sentiment, with an imagination
+invigorated by the exercise of genius, how could he sink into the
+grossness of sensuality!
+
+"But, to pass over a subject which I recollect with pain, I must remark
+to you, as an answer to your often-repeated question, 'Why my sentiments
+and language were superior to my station?' that I now began to read, to
+beguile the tediousness of solitude, and to gratify an inquisitive,
+active mind. I had often, in my childhood, followed a ballad-singer, to
+hear the sequel of a dismal story, though sure of being severely punished
+for delaying to return with whatever I was sent to purchase. I could just
+spell and put a sentence together, and I listened to the various
+arguments, though often mingled with obscenity, which occurred at the
+table where I was allowed to preside: for a literary friend or two
+frequently came home with my master, to dine and pass the night. Having
+lost the privileged respect of my sex, my presence, instead of
+restraining, perhaps gave the reins to their tongues; still I had the
+advantage of hearing discussions, from which, in the common course of
+life, women are excluded.
+
+"You may easily imagine, that it was only by degrees that I could
+comprehend some of the subjects they investigated, or acquire from their
+reasoning what might be termed a moral sense. But my fondness of reading
+increasing, and my master occasionally shutting himself up in this
+retreat, for weeks together, to write, I had many opportunities of
+improvement. At first, considering money I was right!" (exclaimed Jemima,
+altering her tone of voice) "as the only means, after my loss of
+reputation, of obtaining respect, or even the toleration of humanity, I
+had not the least scruple to secrete a part of the sums intrusted to me,
+and to screen myself from detection by a system of falshood. But,
+acquiring new principles, I began to have the ambition of returning to
+the respectable part of society, and was weak enough to suppose it
+possible. The attention of my unassuming instructor, who, without being
+ignorant of his own powers, possessed great simplicity of manners,
+strengthened the illusion. Having sometimes caught up hints for thought,
+from my untutored remarks, he often led me to discuss the subjects he was
+treating, and would read to me his productions, previous to their
+publication, wishing to profit by the criticism of unsophisticated
+feeling. The aim of his writings was to touch the simple springs of the
+heart; for he despised the would-be oracles, the self-elected
+philosophers, who fright away fancy, while sifting each grain of thought
+to prove that slowness of comprehension is wisdom.
+
+"I should have distinguished this as a moment of sunshine, a happy period
+in my life, had not the repugnance the disgusting libertinism of my
+protector inspired, daily become more painful.--And, indeed, I soon did
+recollect it as such with agony, when his sudden death (for he had
+recourse to the most exhilarating cordials to keep up the convivial tone
+of his spirits) again threw me into the desert of human society. Had he
+had any time for reflection, I am certain he would have left the little
+property in his power to me: but, attacked by the fatal apoplexy in town,
+his heir, a man of rigid morals, brought his wife with him to take
+possession of the house and effects, before I was even informed of his
+death,--'to prevent,' as she took care indirectly to tell me, 'such a
+creature as she supposed me to be, from purloining any of them, had I
+been apprized of the event in time.'
+
+"The grief I felt at the sudden shock the information gave me, which at
+first had nothing selfish in it, was treated with contempt, and I was
+ordered to pack up my clothes; and a few trinkets and books, given me by
+the generous deceased, were contested, while they piously hoped, with a
+reprobating shake of the head, 'that God would have mercy on his sinful
+soul!' With some difficulty, I obtained my arrears of wages; but
+asking--such is the spirit-grinding consequence of poverty and
+infamy--for a character for honesty and economy, which God knows I
+merited, I was told by this--why must I call her woman?--'that it would
+go against her conscience to recommend a kept mistress.' Tears started in
+my eyes, burning tears; for there are situations in which a wretch is
+humbled by the contempt they are conscious they do not deserve.
+
+"I returned to the metropolis; but the solitude of a poor lodging was
+inconceivably dreary, after the society I had enjoyed. To be cut off from
+human converse, now I had been taught to relish it, was to wander a ghost
+among the living. Besides, I foresaw, to aggravate the severity of my
+fate, that my little pittance would soon melt away. I endeavoured to
+obtain needlework; but, not having been taught early, and my hands being
+rendered clumsy by hard work, I did not sufficiently excel to be employed
+by the ready-made linen shops, when so many women, better qualified, were
+suing for it. The want of a character prevented my getting a place; for,
+irksome as servitude would have been to me, I should have made another
+trial, had it been feasible. Not that I disliked employment, but the
+inequality of condition to which I must have submitted. I had acquired a
+taste for literature, during the five years I had lived with a literary
+man, occasionally conversing with men of the first abilities of the age;
+and now to descend to the lowest vulgarity, was a degree of wretchedness
+not to be imagined unfelt. I had not, it is true, tasted the charms of
+affection, but I had been familiar with the graces of humanity.
+
+"One of the gentlemen, whom I had frequently dined in company with, while
+I was treated like a companion, met me in the street, and enquired after
+my health. I seized the occasion, and began to describe my situation; but
+he was in haste to join, at dinner, a select party of choice spirits;
+therefore, without waiting to hear me, he impatiently put a guinea into
+my hand, saying, 'It was a pity such a sensible woman should be in
+distress--he wished me well from his soul.'
+
+"To another I wrote, stating my case, and requesting advice. He was an
+advocate for unequivocal sincerity; and had often, in my presence,
+descanted on the evils which arise in society from the despotism of rank
+and riches.
+
+"In reply, I received a long essay on the energy of the human mind, with
+continual allusions to his own force of character. He added, 'That the
+woman who could write such a letter as I had sent him, could never be in
+want of resources, were she to look into herself, and exert her powers;
+misery was the consequence of indolence, and, as to my being shut out
+from society, it was the lot of man to submit to certain privations.'
+
+"How often have I heard," said Jemima, interrupting her narrative, "in
+conversation, and read in books, that every person willing to work may
+find employment? It is the vague assertion, I believe, of insensible
+indolence, when it relates to men; but, with respect to women, I am sure
+of its fallacy, unless they will submit to the most menial bodily labour;
+and even to be employed at hard labour is out of the reach of many, whose
+reputation misfortune or folly has tainted.
+
+"How writers, professing to be friends to freedom, and the improvement of
+morals, can assert that poverty is no evil, I cannot imagine."
+
+"No more can I," interrupted Maria, "yet they even expatiate on the
+peculiar happiness of indigence, though in what it can consist, excepting
+in brutal rest, when a man can barely earn a subsistence, I cannot
+imagine. The mind is necessarily imprisoned in its own little tenement;
+and, fully occupied by keeping it in repair, has not time to rove abroad
+for improvement. The book of knowledge is closely clasped, against those
+who must fulfil their daily task of severe manual labour or die; and
+curiosity, rarely excited by thought or information, seldom moves on the
+stagnate lake of ignorance."
+
+"As far as I have been able to observe," replied Jemima, "prejudices,
+caught up by chance, are obstinately maintained by the poor, to the
+exclusion of improvement; they have not time to reason or reflect to any
+extent, or minds sufficiently exercised to adopt the principles of
+action, which form perhaps the only basis of contentment in every
+station[114-A]."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+"And independence," said Darnford, "they are necessarily strangers to,
+even the independence of despising their persecutors. If the poor are
+happy, or can be happy, _things are very well as they are_. And I cannot
+conceive on what principle those writers contend for a change of system,
+who support this opinion. The authors on the other side of the question
+are much more consistent, who grant the fact; yet, insisting that it is
+the lot of the majority to be oppressed in this life, kindly turn them
+over to another, to rectify the false weights and measures of this, as
+the only way to justify the dispensations of Providence. I have not,"
+continued Darnford, "an opinion more firmly fixed by observation in my
+mind, than that, though riches may fail to produce proportionate
+happiness, poverty most commonly excludes it, by shutting up all the
+avenues to improvement."
+
+"And as for the affections," added Maria, with a sigh, "how gross, and
+even tormenting do they become, unless regulated by an improving mind!
+The culture of the heart ever, I believe, keeps pace with that of the
+mind. But pray go on," addressing Jemima, "though your narrative gives
+rise to the most painful reflections on the present state of society."
+
+"Not to trouble you," continued she, "with a detailed description of all
+the painful feelings of unavailing exertion, I have only to tell you,
+that at last I got recommended to wash in a few families, who did me the
+favour to admit me into their houses, without the most strict enquiry, to
+wash from one in the morning till eight at night, for eighteen or
+twenty-pence a day. On the happiness to be enjoyed over a washing-tub I
+need not comment; yet you will allow me to observe, that this was a
+wretchedness of situation peculiar to my sex. A man with half my
+industry, and, I may say, abilities, could have procured a decent
+livelihood, and discharged some of the duties which knit mankind
+together; whilst I, who had acquired a taste for the rational, nay, in
+honest pride let me assert it, the virtuous enjoyments of life, was cast
+aside as the filth of society. Condemned to labour, like a machine, only
+to earn bread, and scarcely that, I became melancholy and desperate.
+
+"I have now to mention a circumstance which fills me with remorse, and
+fear it will entirely deprive me of your esteem. A tradesman became
+attached to me, and visited me frequently,--and I at last obtained such a
+power over him, that he offered to take me home to his house.--Consider,
+dear madam, I was famishing: wonder not that I became a wolf!--The only
+reason for not taking me home immediately, was the having a girl in the
+house, with child by him--and this girl--I advised him--yes, I did! would
+I could forget it!--to turn out of doors: and one night he determined to
+follow my advice, Poor wretch! she fell upon her knees, reminded him
+that he had promised to marry her, that her parents were honest!--What
+did it avail?--She was turned out.
+
+"She approached her father's door, in the skirts of London,--listened at
+the shutters,--but could not knock. A watchman had observed her go and
+return several times--Poor wretch!--"The remorse Jemima spoke of, seemed
+to be stinging her to the soul, as she proceeded."
+
+"She left it, and, approaching a tub where horses were watered, she sat
+down in it, and, with desperate resolution, remained in that
+attitude--till resolution was no longer necessary!
+
+"I happened that morning to be going out to wash, anticipating the moment
+when I should escape from such hard labour. I passed by, just as some
+men, going to work, drew out the stiff, cold corpse--Let me not recal the
+horrid moment!--I recognized her pale visage; I listened to the tale told
+by the spectators, and my heart did not burst. I thought of my own state,
+and wondered how I could be such a monster!--I worked hard; and,
+returning home, I was attacked by a fever. I suffered both in body and
+mind. I determined not to live with the wretch. But he did not try me; he
+left the neighbourhood. I once more returned to the wash-tub.
+
+"Still this state, miserable as it was, admitted of aggravation. Lifting
+one day a heavy load, a tub fell against my shin, and gave me great pain.
+I did not pay much attention to the hurt, till it became a serious wound;
+being obliged to work as usual, or starve. But, finding myself at length
+unable to stand for any time, I thought of getting into an hospital.
+Hospitals, it should seem (for they are comfortless abodes for the sick)
+were expressly endowed for the reception of the friendless; yet I, who
+had on that plea a right to assistance, wanted the recommendation of the
+rich and respectable, and was several weeks languishing for admittance;
+fees were demanded on entering; and, what was still more unreasonable,
+security for burying me, that expence not coming into the letter of the
+charity. A guinea was the stipulated sum--I could as soon have raised a
+million; and I was afraid to apply to the parish for an order, lest they
+should have passed me, I knew not whither. The poor woman at whose house
+I lodged, compassionating my state, got me into the hospital; and the
+family where I received the hurt, sent me five shillings, three and
+six-pence of which I gave at my admittance--I know not for what.
+
+"My leg grew quickly better; but I was dismissed before my cure was
+completed, because I could not afford to have my linen washed to appear
+decently, as the virago of a nurse said, when the gentlemen (the
+surgeons) came. I cannot give you an adequate idea of the wretchedness of
+an hospital; every thing is left to the care of people intent on gain.
+The attendants seem to have lost all feeling of compassion in the
+bustling discharge of their offices; death is so familiar to them, that
+they are not anxious to ward it off. Every thing appeared to be conducted
+for the accommodation of the medical men and their pupils, who came to
+make experiments on the poor, for the benefit of the rich. One of the
+physicians, I must not forget to mention, gave me half-a-crown, and
+ordered me some wine, when I was at the lowest ebb. I thought of making
+my case known to the lady-like matron; but her forbidding countenance
+prevented me. She condescended to look on the patients, and make general
+enquiries, two or three times a week; but the nurses knew the hour when
+the visit of ceremony would commence, and every thing was as it should
+be.
+
+"After my dismission, I was more at a loss than ever for a subsistence,
+and, not to weary you with a repetition of the same unavailing attempts,
+unable to stand at the washing-tub, I began to consider the rich and poor
+as natural enemies, and became a thief from principle. I could not now
+cease to reason, but I hated mankind. I despised myself, yet I justified
+my conduct. I was taken, tried, and condemned to six months' imprisonment
+in a house of correction. My soul recoils with horror from the
+remembrance of the insults I had to endure, till, branded with shame, I
+was turned loose in the street, pennyless. I wandered from street to
+street, till, exhausted by hunger and fatigue, I sunk down senseless at a
+door, where I had vainly demanded a morsel of bread. I was sent by the
+inhabitant to the work-house, to which he had surlily bid me go, saying,
+he 'paid enough in conscience to the poor,' when, with parched tongue, I
+implored his charity. If those well-meaning people who exclaim against
+beggars, were acquainted with the treatment the poor receive in many of
+these wretched asylums, they would not stifle so easily involuntary
+sympathy, by saying that they have all parishes to go to, or wonder that
+the poor dread to enter the gloomy walls. What are the common run of
+work-houses, but prisons, in which many respectable old people, worn out
+by immoderate labour, sink into the grave in sorrow, to which they are
+carried like dogs!"
+
+Alarmed by some indistinct noise, Jemima rose hastily to listen, and
+Maria, turning to Darnford, said, "I have indeed been shocked beyond
+expression when I have met a pauper's funeral. A coffin carried on the
+shoulders of three or four ill-looking wretches, whom the imagination
+might easily convert into a band of assassins, hastening to conceal the
+corpse, and quarrelling about the prey on their way. I know it is of
+little consequence how we are consigned to the earth; but I am led by
+this brutal insensibility, to what even the animal creation appears
+forcibly to feel, to advert to the wretched, deserted manner in which
+they died."
+
+"True," rejoined Darnford, "and, till the rich will give more than a part
+of their wealth, till they will give time and attention to the wants of
+the distressed, never let them boast of charity. Let them open their
+hearts, and not their purses, and employ their minds in the service, if
+they are really actuated by humanity; or charitable institutions will
+always be the prey of the lowest order of knaves."
+
+Jemima returning, seemed in haste to finish her tale. "The overseer
+farmed the poor of different parishes, and out of the bowels of poverty
+was wrung the money with which he purchased this dwelling, as a private
+receptacle for madness. He had been a keeper at a house of the same
+description, and conceived that he could make money much more readily in
+his old occupation. He is a shrewd--shall I say it?--villain. He observed
+something resolute in my manner, and offered to take me with him, and
+instruct me how to treat the disturbed minds he meant to intrust to my
+care. The offer of forty pounds a year, and to quit a workhouse, was not
+to be despised, though the condition of shutting my eyes and hardening my
+heart was annexed to it.
+
+"I agreed to accompany him; and four years have I been attendant on many
+wretches, and"--she lowered her voice,--"the witness of many enormities.
+In solitude my mind seemed to recover its force, and many of the
+sentiments which I imbibed in the only tolerable period of my life,
+returned with their full force. Still what should induce me to be the
+champion for suffering humanity?--Who ever risked any thing for me?--Who
+ever acknowledged me to be a fellow-creature?"--
+
+Maria took her hand, and Jemima, more overcome by kindness than she had
+ever been by cruelty, hastened out of the room to conceal her emotions.
+
+Darnford soon after heard his summons, and, taking leave of him, Maria
+promised to gratify his curiosity, with respect to herself, the first
+opportunity.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[114-A] The copy which appears to have received the author's last
+corrections, ends at this place.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. VI.
+
+
+ACTIVE as love was in the heart of Maria, the story she had just heard
+made her thoughts take a wider range. The opening buds of hope closed, as
+if they had put forth too early, and the the happiest day of her life was
+overcast by the most melancholy reflections. Thinking of Jemima's
+peculiar fate and her own, she was led to consider the oppressed state of
+women, and to lament that she had given birth to a daughter. Sleep fled
+from her eyelids, while she dwelt on the wretchedness of unprotected
+infancy, till sympathy with Jemima changed to agony, when it seemed
+probable that her own babe might even now be in the very state she so
+forcibly described.
+
+Maria thought, and thought again. Jemima's humanity had rather been
+benumbed than killed, by the keen frost she had to brave at her entrance
+into life; an appeal then to her feelings, on this tender point, surely
+would not be fruitless; and Maria began to anticipate the delight it
+would afford her to gain intelligence of her child. This project was now
+the only subject of reflection; and she watched impatiently for the dawn
+of day, with that determinate purpose which generally insures success.
+
+At the usual hour, Jemima brought her breakfast, and a tender note from
+Darnford. She ran her eye hastily over it, and her heart calmly hoarded
+up the rapture a fresh assurance of affection, affection such as she
+wished to inspire, gave her, without diverting her mind a moment from its
+design. While Jemima waited to take away the breakfast, Maria alluded to
+the reflections, that had haunted her during the night to the exclusion
+of sleep. She spoke with energy of Jemima's unmerited sufferings, and of
+the fate of a number of deserted females, placed within the sweep of a
+whirlwind, from which it was next to impossible to escape. Perceiving the
+effect her conversation produced on the countenance of her guard, she
+grasped the arm of Jemima with that irresistible warmth which defies
+repulse, exclaiming--"With your heart, and such dreadful experience, can
+you lend your aid to deprive my babe of a mother's tenderness, a mother's
+care? In the name of God, assist me to snatch her from destruction! Let
+me but give her an education--let me but prepare her body and mind to
+encounter the ills which await her sex, and I will teach her to consider
+you as her second mother, and herself as the prop of your age. Yes,
+Jemima, look at me--observe me closely, and read my very soul; you merit
+a better fate;" she held out her hand with a firm gesture of assurance;
+"and I will procure it for you, as a testimony of my esteem, as well as
+of my gratitude."
+
+Jemima had not power to resist this persuasive torrent; and, owning that
+the house in which she was confined, was situated on the banks of the
+Thames, only a few miles from London, and not on the sea-coast, as
+Darnford had supposed, she promised to invent some excuse for her
+absence, and go herself to trace the situation, and enquire concerning
+the health, of this abandoned daughter. Her manner implied an intention
+to do something more, but she seemed unwilling to impart her design; and
+Maria, glad to have obtained the main point, thought it best to leave her
+to the workings of her own mind; convinced that she had the power of
+interesting her still more in favour of herself and child, by a simple
+recital of facts.
+
+In the evening, Jemima informed the impatient mother, that on the morrow
+she should hasten to town before the family hour of rising, and received
+all the information necessary, as a clue to her search. The "Good night!"
+Maria uttered was peculiarly solemn and affectionate. Glad expectation
+sparkled in her eye; and, for the first time since her detention, she
+pronounced the name of her child with pleasureable fondness; and, with
+all the garrulity of a nurse, described her first smile when she
+recognized her mother. Recollecting herself, a still kinder "Adieu!" with
+a "God bless you!"--that seemed to include a maternal benediction,
+dismissed Jemima.
+
+The dreary solitude of the ensuing day, lengthened by impatiently
+dwelling on the same idea, was intolerably wearisome. She listened for
+the sound of a particular clock, which some directions of the wind
+allowed her to hear distinctly. She marked the shadow gaining on the
+wall; and, twilight thickening into darkness, her breath seemed oppressed
+while she anxiously counted nine.--The last sound was a stroke of
+despair on her heart; for she expected every moment, without seeing
+Jemima, to have her light extinguished by the savage female who supplied
+her place. She was even obliged to prepare for bed, restless as she was,
+not to disoblige her new attendant. She had been cautioned not to speak
+too freely to her; but the caution was needless, her countenance would
+still more emphatically have made her shrink back. Such was the ferocity
+of manner, conspicuous in every word and gesture of this hag, that Maria
+was afraid to enquire, why Jemima, who had faithfully promised to see her
+before her door was shut for the night, came not?--and, when the key
+turned in the lock, to consign her to a night of suspence, she felt a
+degree of anguish which the circumstances scarcely justified.
+
+Continually on the watch, the shutting of a door, or the sound of a
+footstep, made her start and tremble with apprehension, something like
+what she felt, when, at her entrance, dragged along the gallery, she
+began to doubt whether she were not surrounded by demons?
+
+Fatigued by an endless rotation of thought and wild alarms, she looked
+like a spectre, when Jemima entered in the morning; especially as her
+eyes darted out of her head, to read in Jemima's countenance, almost as
+pallid, the intelligence she dared not trust her tongue to demand. Jemima
+put down the tea-things, and appeared very busy in arranging the table.
+Maria took up a cup with trembling hand, then forcibly recovering her
+fortitude, and restraining the convulsive movement which agitated the
+muscles of her mouth, she said, "Spare yourself the pain of preparing me
+for your information, I adjure you!--My child is dead!" Jemima solemnly
+answered, "Yes;" with a look expressive of compassion and angry emotions.
+"Leave me," added Maria, making a fresh effort to govern her feelings,
+and hiding her face in her handkerchief, to conceal her anguish--"It is
+enough--I know that my babe is no more--I will hear the particulars when
+I am"--_calmer_, she could not utter; and Jemima, without importuning her
+by idle attempts to console her, left the room.
+
+Plunged in the deepest melancholy, she would not admit Darnford's visits;
+and such is the force of early associations even on strong minds, that,
+for a while, she indulged the superstitious notion that she was justly
+punished by the death of her child, for having for an instant ceased to
+regret her loss. Two or three letters from Darnford, full of soothing,
+manly tenderness, only added poignancy to these accusing emotions; yet
+the passionate style in which he expressed, what he termed the first and
+fondest wish of his heart, "that his affection might make her some amends
+for the cruelty and injustice she had endured," inspired a sentiment of
+gratitude to heaven; and her eyes filled with delicious tears, when, at
+the conclusion of his letter, wishing to supply the place of her unworthy
+relations, whose want of principle he execrated, he assured her, calling
+her his dearest girl, "that it should henceforth be the business of his
+life to make her happy."
+
+He begged, in a note sent the following morning, to be permitted to see
+her, when his presence would be no intrusion on her grief; and so
+earnestly intreated to be allowed, according to promise, to beguile the
+tedious moments of absence, by dwelling on the events of her past life,
+that she sent him the memoirs which had been written for her daughter,
+promising Jemima the perusal as soon as he returned them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. VII.
+
+
+"ADDRESSING these memoirs to you, my child, uncertain whether I shall
+ever have an opportunity of instructing you, many observations will
+probably flow from my heart, which only a mother--a mother schooled in
+misery, could make.
+
+"The tenderness of a father who knew the world, might be great; but could
+it equal that of a mother--of a mother, labouring under a portion of the
+misery, which the constitution of society seems to have entailed on all
+her kind? It is, my child, my dearest daughter, only such a mother, who
+will dare to break through all restraint to provide for your
+happiness--who will voluntarily brave censure herself, to ward off
+sorrow from your bosom. From my narrative, my dear girl, you may gather
+the instruction, the counsel, which is meant rather to exercise than
+influence your mind.--Death may snatch me from you, before you can weigh
+my advice, or enter into my reasoning: I would then, with fond anxiety,
+lead you very early in life to form your grand principle of action, to
+save you from the vain regret of having, through irresolution, let the
+spring-tide of existence pass away, unimproved, unenjoyed.--Gain
+experience--ah! gain it--while experience is worth having, and acquire
+sufficient fortitude to pursue your own happiness; it includes your
+utility, by a direct path. What is wisdom too often, but the owl of the
+goddess, who sits moping in a desolated heart; around me she shrieks,
+but I would invite all the gay warblers of spring to nestle in your
+blooming bosom.--Had I not wasted years in deliberating, after I ceased
+to doubt, how I ought to have acted--I might now be useful and
+happy.--For my sake, warned by my example, always appear what you are,
+and you will not pass through existence without enjoying its genuine
+blessings, love and respect.
+
+"Born in one of the most romantic parts of England, an enthusiastic
+fondness for the varying charms of nature is the first sentiment I
+recollect; or rather it was the first consciousness of pleasure that
+employed and formed my imagination.
+
+"My father had been a captain of a man of war; but, disgusted with the
+service, on account of the preferment of men whose chief merit was their
+family connections or borough interest, he retired into the country; and,
+not knowing what to do with himself--married. In his family, to regain
+his lost consequence, he determined to keep up the same passive
+obedience, as in the vessels in which he had commanded. His orders were
+not to be disputed; and the whole house was expected to fly, at the word
+of command, as if to man the shrouds, or mount aloft in an elemental
+strife, big with life or death. He was to be instantaneously obeyed,
+especially by my mother, whom he very benevolently married for love; but
+took care to remind her of the obligation, when she dared, in the
+slightest instance, to question his absolute authority. My eldest
+brother, it is true, as he grew up, was treated with more respect by my
+father; and became in due form the deputy-tyrant of the house. The
+representative of my father, a being privileged by nature--a boy, and the
+darling of my mother, he did not fail to act like an heir apparent. Such
+indeed was my mother's extravagant partiality, that, in comparison with
+her affection for him, she might be said not to love the rest of her
+children. Yet none of the children seemed to have so little affection for
+her. Extreme indulgence had rendered him so selfish, that he only thought
+of himself; and from tormenting insects and animals, he became the despot
+of his brothers, and still more of his sisters.
+
+"It is perhaps difficult to give you an idea of the petty cares which
+obscured the morning of my life; continual restraint in the most trivial
+matters; unconditional submission to orders, which, as a mere child, I
+soon discovered to be unreasonable, because inconsistent and
+contradictory. Thus are we destined to experience a mixture of
+bitterness, with the recollection of our most innocent enjoyments.
+
+"The circumstances which, during my childhood, occurred to fashion my
+mind, were various; yet, as it would probably afford me more pleasure to
+revive the fading remembrance of new-born delight, than you, my child,
+could feel in the perusal, I will not entice you to stray with me into
+the verdant meadow, to search for the flowers that youthful hopes scatter
+in every path; though, as I write, I almost scent the fresh green of
+spring--of that spring which never returns!
+
+"I had two sisters, and one brother, younger than myself; my brother
+Robert was two years older, and might truly be termed the idol of his
+parents, and the torment of the rest of the family. Such indeed is the
+force of prejudice, that what was called spirit and wit in him, was
+cruelly repressed as forwardness in me.
+
+"My mother had an indolence of character, which prevented her from paying
+much attention to our education. But the healthy breeze of a neighbouring
+heath, on which we bounded at pleasure, volatilized the humours that
+improper food might have generated. And to enjoy open air and freedom,
+was paradise, after the unnatural restraint of our fire-side, where we
+were often obliged to sit three or four hours together, without daring to
+utter a word, when my father was out of humour, from want of employment,
+or of a variety of boisterous amusement. I had however one advantage, an
+instructor, the brother of my father, who, intended for the church, had
+of course received a liberal education. But, becoming attached to a young
+lady of great beauty and large fortune, and acquiring in the world some
+opinions not consonant with the profession for which he was designed, he
+accepted, with the most sanguine expectations of success, the offer of a
+nobleman to accompany him to India, as his confidential secretary.
+
+"A correspondence was regularly kept up with the object of his affection;
+and the intricacies of business, peculiarly wearisome to a man of a
+romantic turn of mind, contributed, with a forced absence, to increase
+his attachment. Every other passion was lost in this master-one, and
+only served to swell the torrent. Her relations, such were his waking
+dreams, who had despised him, would court in their turn his alliance, and
+all the blandishments of taste would grace the triumph of love.--While he
+basked in the warm sunshine of love, friendship also promised to shed its
+dewy freshness; for a friend, whom he loved next to his mistress, was the
+confident, who forwarded the letters from one to the other, to elude the
+observation of prying relations. A friend false in similar circumstances,
+is, my dearest girl, an old tale; yet, let not this example, or the
+frigid caution of cold-blooded moralists, make you endeavour to stifle
+hopes, which are the buds that naturally unfold themselves during the
+spring of life! Whilst your own heart is sincere, always expect to meet
+one glowing with the same sentiments; for to fly from pleasure, is not to
+avoid pain!
+
+"My uncle realized, by good luck, rather than management, a handsome
+fortune; and returning on the wings of love, lost in the most enchanting
+reveries, to England, to share it with his mistress and his friend, he
+found them--united.
+
+"There were some circumstances, not necessary for me to recite, which
+aggravated the guilt of the friend beyond measure, and the deception,
+that had been carried on to the last moment, was so base, it produced the
+most violent effect on my uncle's health and spirits. His native country,
+the world! lately a garden of blooming sweets, blasted by treachery,
+seemed changed into a parched desert, the abode of hissing serpents.
+Disappointment rankled in his heart; and, brooding over his wrongs, he
+was attacked by a raging fever, followed by a derangement of mind, which
+only gave place to habitual melancholy, as he recovered more strength of
+body.
+
+"Declaring an intention never to marry, his relations were ever
+clustering about him, paying the grossest adulation to a man, who,
+disgusted with mankind, received them with scorn, or bitter sarcasms.
+Something in my countenance pleased him, when I began to prattle. Since
+his return, he appeared dead to affection; but I soon, by showing him
+innocent fondness, became a favourite; and endeavouring to enlarge and
+strengthen my mind, I grew dear to him in proportion as I imbibed his
+sentiments. He had a forcible manner of speaking, rendered more so by a
+certain impressive wildness of look and gesture, calculated to engage the
+attention of a young and ardent mind. It is not then surprising that I
+quickly adopted his opinions in preference, and reverenced him as one of
+a superior order of beings. He inculcated, with great warmth,
+self-respect, and a lofty consciousness of acting right, independent of
+the censure or applause of the world; nay, he almost taught me to brave,
+and even despise its censure, when convinced of the rectitude of my own
+intentions.
+
+"Endeavouring to prove to me that nothing which deserved the name of love
+or friendship, existed in the world, he drew such animated pictures of
+his own feelings, rendered permanent by disappointment, as imprinted the
+sentiments strongly on my heart, and animated my imagination. These
+remarks are necessary to elucidate some peculiarities in my character,
+which by the world are indefinitely termed romantic.
+
+"My uncle's increasing affection led him to visit me often. Still, unable
+to rest in any place, he did not remain long in the country to soften
+domestic tyranny; but he brought me books, for which I had a passion, and
+they conspired with his conversation, to make me form an ideal picture of
+life. I shall pass over the tyranny of my father, much as I suffered from
+it; but it is necessary to notice, that it undermined my mother's health;
+and that her temper, continually irritated by domestic bickering, became
+intolerably peevish.
+
+"My eldest brother was articled to a neighbouring attorney, the
+shrewdest, and, I may add, the most unprincipled man in that part of the
+country. As my brother generally came home every Saturday, to astonish my
+mother by exhibiting his attainments, he gradually assumed a right of
+directing the whole family, not excepting my father. He seemed to take a
+peculiar pleasure in tormenting and humbling me; and if I ever ventured
+to complain of this treatment to either my father or mother, I was rudely
+rebuffed for presuming to judge of the conduct of my eldest brother.
+
+"About this period a merchant's family came to settle in our
+neighbourhood. A mansion-house in the village, lately purchased, had been
+preparing the whole spring, and the sight of the costly furniture, sent
+from London, had excited my mother's envy, and roused my father's pride.
+My sensations were very different, and all of a pleasurable kind. I
+longed to see new characters, to break the tedious monotony of my life;
+and to find a friend, such as fancy had pourtrayed. I cannot then
+describe the emotion I felt, the Sunday they made their appearance at
+church. My eyes were rivetted on the pillar round which I expected first
+to catch a glimpse of them, and darted forth to meet a servant who
+hastily preceded a group of ladies, whose white robes and waving plumes,
+seemed to stream along the gloomy aisle, diffusing the light, by which I
+contemplated their figures.
+
+"We visited them in form; and I quickly selected the eldest daughter for
+my friend. The second son, George, paid me particular attention, and
+finding his attainments and manners superior to those of the young men of
+the village, I began to imagine him superior to the rest of mankind. Had
+my home been more comfortable, or my previous acquaintance more numerous,
+I should not probably have been so eager to open my heart to new
+affections.
+
+"Mr. Venables, the merchant, had acquired a large fortune by unremitting
+attention to business; but his health declining rapidly, he was obliged
+to retire, before his son, George, had acquired sufficient experience, to
+enable him to conduct their affairs on the same prudential plan, his
+father had invariably pursued. Indeed, he had laboured to throw off his
+authority, having despised his narrow plans and cautious speculation. The
+eldest son could not be prevailed on to enter the firm; and, to oblige
+his wife, and have peace in the house, Mr. Venables had purchased a
+commission for him in the guards.
+
+"I am now alluding to circumstances which came to my knowledge long
+after; but it is necessary, my dearest child, that you should know the
+character of your father, to prevent your despising your mother; the only
+parent inclined to discharge a parent's duty. In London, George had
+acquired habits of libertinism, which he carefully concealed from his
+father and his commercial connections. The mask he wore, was so complete
+a covering of his real visage, that the praise his father lavished on his
+conduct, and, poor mistaken man! on his principles, contrasted with his
+brother's, rendered the notice he took of me peculiarly flattering.
+Without any fixed design, as I am now convinced, he continued to single
+me out at the dance, press my hand at parting, and utter expressions of
+unmeaning passion, to which I gave a meaning naturally suggested by the
+romantic turn of my thoughts. His stay in the country was short; his
+manners did not entirely please me; but, when he left us, the colouring
+of my picture became more vivid--Whither did not my imagination lead me?
+In short, I fancied myself in love--in love with the disinterestedness,
+fortitude, generosity, dignity, and humanity, with which I had invested
+the hero I dubbed. A circumstance which soon after occurred, rendered all
+these virtues palpable. [The incident is perhaps worth relating on other
+accounts, and therefore I shall describe it distinctly.]
+
+"I had a great affection for my nurse, old Mary, for whom I used often to
+work, to spare her eyes. Mary had a younger sister, married to a sailor,
+while she was suckling me; for my mother only suckled my eldest brother,
+which might be the cause of her extraordinary partiality. Peggy, Mary's
+sister, lived with her, till her husband, becoming a mate in a West-India
+trader, got a little before-hand in the world. He wrote to his wife from
+the first port in the Channel, after his most successful voyage, to
+request her to come to London to meet him; he even wished her to
+determine on living there for the future, to save him the trouble of
+coming to her the moment he came on shore; and to turn a penny by
+keeping a green-stall. It was too much to set out on a journey the
+moment he had finished a voyage, and fifty miles by land, was worse than
+a thousand leagues by sea.
+
+"She packed up her alls, and came to London--but did not meet honest
+Daniel. A common misfortune prevented her, and the poor are bound to
+suffer for the good of their country--he was pressed in the river--and
+never came on shore.
+
+"Peggy was miserable in London, not knowing, as she said, 'the face of
+any living soul.' Besides, her imagination had been employed,
+anticipating a month or six weeks' happiness with her husband. Daniel was
+to have gone with her to Sadler's Wells, and Westminster Abbey, and to
+many sights, which he knew she never heard of in the country. Peggy too
+was thrifty, and how could she manage to put his plan in execution
+alone? He had acquaintance; but she did not know the very name of their
+places of abode. His letters were made up of--How do you does, and God
+bless yous,--information was reserved for the hour of meeting.
+
+"She too had her portion of information, near at heart. Molly and Jacky
+were grown such little darlings, she was almost angry that daddy did not
+see their tricks. She had not half the pleasure she should have had from
+their prattle, could she have recounted to him each night the pretty
+speeches of the day. Some stories, however, were stored up--and Jacky
+could say papa with such a sweet voice, it must delight his heart. Yet
+when she came, and found no Daniel to greet her, when Jacky called papa,
+she wept, bidding 'God bless his innocent soul, that did not know what
+sorrow was.'--But more sorrow was in store for Peggy, innocent as she
+was.--Daniel was killed in the first engagement, and then the _papa_ was
+agony, sounding to the heart.
+
+"She had lived sparingly on his wages, while there was any hope of his
+return; but, that gone, she returned with a breaking heart to the
+country, to a little market town, nearly three miles from our village.
+She did not like to go to service, to be snubbed about, after being her
+own mistress. To put her children out to nurse was impossible: how far
+would her wages go? and to send them to her husband's parish, a distant
+one, was to lose her husband twice over.
+
+"I had heard all from Mary, and made my uncle furnish a little cottage
+for her, to enable her to sell--so sacred was poor Daniel's advice, now
+he was dead and gone--a little fruit, toys and cakes. The minding of the
+shop did not require her whole time, nor even the keeping her children
+clean, and she loved to see them clean; so she took in washing, and
+altogether made a shift to earn bread for her children, still weeping for
+Daniel, when Jacky's arch looks made her think of his father.--It was
+pleasant to work for her children.--'Yes; from morning till night, could
+she have had a kiss from their father, God rest his soul! Yes; had it
+pleased Providence to have let him come back without a leg or an arm, it
+would have been the same thing to her--for she did not love him because
+he maintained them--no; she had hands of her own.'
+
+"The country people were honest, and Peggy left her linen out to dry very
+late. A recruiting party, as she supposed, passing through, made free
+with a large wash; for it was all swept away, including her own and her
+children's little stock.
+
+"This was a dreadful blow; two dozen of shirts, stocks and handkerchiefs.
+She gave the money which she had laid by for half a year's rent, and
+promised to pay two shillings a week till all was cleared; so she did not
+lose her employment. This two shillings a week, and the buying a few
+necessaries for the children, drove her so hard, that she had not a penny
+to pay her rent with, when a twelvemonth's became due.
+
+"She was now with Mary, and had just told her tale, which Mary instantly
+repeated--it was intended for my ear. Many houses in this town, producing
+a borough-interest, were included in the estate purchased by Mr.
+Venables, and the attorney with whom my brother lived, was appointed his
+agent, to collect and raise the rents.
+
+"He demanded Peggy's, and, in spite of her intreaties, her poor goods had
+been seized and sold. So that she had not, and what was worse her
+children, 'for she had known sorrow enough,' a bed to lie on. She knew
+that I was good-natured--right charitable, yet not liking to ask for more
+than needs must, she scorned to petition while people could any how be
+made to wait. But now, should she be turned out of doors, she must
+expect nothing less than to lose all her customers, and then she must
+beg or starve--and what would become of her children?--'had Daniel not
+been pressed--but God knows best--all this could not have happened.'
+
+"I had two mattrasses on my bed; what did I want with two, when such a
+worthy creature must lie on the ground? My mother would be angry, but I
+could conceal it till my uncle came down; and then I would tell him all
+the whole truth, and if he absolved me, heaven would.
+
+"I begged the house-maid to come up stairs with me (servants always feel
+for the distresses of poverty, and so would the rich if they knew what it
+was). She assisted me to tie up the mattrass; I discovering, at the same
+time, that one blanket would serve me till winter, could I persuade my
+sister, who slept with me, to keep my secret. She entering in the midst
+of the package, I gave her some new feathers, to silence her. We got the
+mattrass down the back stairs, unperceived, and I helped to carry it,
+taking with me all the money I had, and what I could borrow from my
+sister.
+
+"When I got to the cottage, Peggy declared that she would not take what I
+had brought secretly; but, when, with all the eager eloquence inspired by
+a decided purpose, I grasped her hand with weeping eyes, assuring her
+that my uncle would screen me from blame, when he was once more in the
+country, describing, at the same time, what she would suffer in parting
+with her children, after keeping them so long from being thrown on the
+parish, she reluctantly consented.
+
+"My project of usefulness ended not here; I determined to speak to the
+attorney; he frequently paid me compliments. His character did not
+intimidate me; but, imagining that Peggy must be mistaken, and that no
+man could turn a deaf ear to such a tale of complicated distress, I
+determined to walk to the town with Mary the next morning, and request
+him to wait for the rent, and keep my secret, till my uncle's return.
+
+"My repose was sweet; and, waking with the first dawn of day, I bounded
+to Mary's cottage. What charms do not a light heart spread over nature!
+Every bird that twittered in a bush, every flower that enlivened the
+hedge, seemed placed there to awaken me to rapture--yes; to rapture. The
+present moment was full fraught with happiness; and on futurity I
+bestowed not a thought, excepting to anticipate my success with the
+attorney.
+
+"This man of the world, with rosy face and simpering features, received
+me politely, nay kindly; listened with complacency to my remonstrances,
+though he scarcely heeded Mary's tears. I did not then suspect, that my
+eloquence was in my complexion, the blush of seventeen, or that, in a
+world where humanity to women is the characteristic of advancing
+civilization, the beauty of a young girl was so much more interesting
+than the distress of an old one. Pressing my hand, he promised to let
+Peggy remain in the house as long as I wished.--I more than returned the
+pressure--I was so grateful and so happy. Emboldened by my innocent
+warmth, he then kissed me--and I did not draw back--I took it for a kiss
+of charity.
+
+"Gay as a lark, I went to dine at Mr. Venables'. I had previously
+obtained five shillings from my father, towards re-clothing the poor
+children of my care, and prevailed on my mother to take one of the girls
+into the house, whom I determined to teach to work and read.
+
+"After dinner, when the younger part of the circle retired to the music
+room, I recounted with energy my tale; that is, I mentioned Peggy's
+distress, without hinting at the steps I had taken to relieve her. Miss
+Venables gave me half-a-crown; the heir five shillings; but George sat
+unmoved. I was cruelly distressed by the disappointment--I scarcely could
+remain on my chair; and, could I have got out of the room unperceived, I
+should have flown home, as if to run away from myself. After several
+vain attempts to rise, I leaned my head against the marble chimney-piece,
+and gazing on the evergreens that filled the fire-place, moralized on the
+vanity of human expectations; regardless of the company. I was roused by
+a gentle tap on my shoulder from behind Charlotte's chair. I turned my
+head, and George slid a guinea into my hand, putting his finger to his
+mouth, to enjoin me silence.
+
+"What a revolution took place, not only in my train of thoughts, but
+feelings! I trembled with emotion--now, indeed, I was in love. Such
+delicacy too, to enhance his benevolence! I felt in my pocket every five
+minutes, only to feel the guinea; and its magic touch invested my hero
+with more than mortal beauty. My fancy had found a basis to erect its
+model of perfection on; and quickly went to work, with all the happy
+credulity of youth, to consider that heart as devoted to virtue, which
+had only obeyed a virtuous impulse. The bitter experience was yet to
+come, that has taught me how very distinct are the principles of virtue,
+from the casual feelings from which they germinate.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. VIII.
+
+
+"I HAVE perhaps dwelt too long on a circumstance, which is only of
+importance as it marks the progress of a deception that has been so fatal
+to my peace; and introduces to your notice a poor girl, whom, intending
+to serve, I led to ruin. Still it is probable that I was not entirely the
+victim of mistake; and that your father, gradually fashioned by the
+world, did not quickly become what I hesitate to call him--out of respect
+to my daughter.
+
+"But, to hasten to the more busy scenes of my life. Mr. Venables and my
+mother died the same summer; and, wholly engrossed by my attention to
+her, I thought of little else. The neglect of her darling, my brother
+Robert, had a violent effect on her weakened mind; for, though boys may
+be reckoned the pillars of the house without doors, girls are often the
+only comfort within. They but too frequently waste their health and
+spirits attending a dying parent, who leaves them in comparative poverty.
+After closing, with filial piety, a father's eyes, they are chased from
+the paternal roof, to make room for the first-born, the son, who is to
+carry the empty family-name down to posterity; though, occupied with his
+own pleasures, he scarcely thought of discharging, in the decline of his
+parent's life, the debt contracted in his childhood. My mother's conduct
+led me to make these reflections. Great as was the fatigue I endured, and
+the affection my unceasing solicitude evinced, of which my mother seemed
+perfectly sensible, still, when my brother, whom I could hardly persuade
+to remain a quarter of an hour in her chamber, was with her alone, a
+short time before her death, she gave him a little hoard, which she had
+been some years accumulating.
+
+"During my mother's illness, I was obliged to manage my father's temper,
+who, from the lingering nature of her malady, began to imagine that it
+was merely fancy. At this period, an artful kind of upper servant
+attracted my father's attention, and the neighbours made many remarks on
+the finery, not honestly got, exhibited at evening service. But I was too
+much occupied with my mother to observe any change in her dress or
+behaviour, or to listen to the whisper of scandal.
+
+"I shall not dwell on the death-bed scene, lively as is the remembrance,
+or on the emotion produced by the last grasp of my mother's cold hand;
+when blessing me, she added, 'A little patience, and all will be over!'
+Ah! my child, how often have those words rung mournfully in my ears--and
+I have exclaimed--'A little more patience, and I too shall be at rest!'
+
+"My father was violently affected by her death, recollected instances of
+his unkindness, and wept like a child.
+
+"My mother had solemnly recommended my sisters to my care, and bid me be
+a mother to them. They, indeed, became more dear to me as they became
+more forlorn; for, during my mother's illness, I discovered the ruined
+state of my father's circumstances, and that he had only been able to
+keep up appearances, by the sums which he borrowed of my uncle.
+
+"My father's grief, and consequent tenderness to his children, quickly
+abated, the house grew still more gloomy or riotous; and my refuge from
+care was again at Mr. Venables'; the young 'squire having taken his
+father's place, and allowing, for the present, his sister to preside at
+his table. George, though dissatisfied with his portion of the fortune,
+which had till lately been all in trade, visited the family as usual. He
+was now full of speculations in trade, and his brow became clouded by
+care. He seemed to relax in his attention to me, when the presence of my
+uncle gave a new turn to his behaviour. I was too unsuspecting, too
+disinterested, to trace these changes to their source.
+
+My home every day became more and more disagreeable to me; my liberty was
+unnecessarily abridged, and my books, on the pretext that they made me
+idle, taken from me. My father's mistress was with child, and he, doating
+on her, allowed or overlooked her vulgar manner of tyrannizing over us. I
+was indignant, especially when I saw her endeavouring to attract, shall I
+say seduce? my younger brother. By allowing women but one way of rising
+in the world, the fostering the libertinism of men, society makes
+monsters of them, and then their ignoble vices are brought forward as a
+proof of inferiority of intellect.
+
+The wearisomeness of my situation can scarcely be described. Though my
+life had not passed in the most even tenour with my mother, it was
+paradise to that I was destined to endure with my father's mistress,
+jealous of her illegitimate authority. My father's former occasional
+tenderness, in spite of his violence of temper, had been soothing to me;
+but now he only met me with reproofs or portentous frowns. The
+house-keeper, as she was now termed, was the vulgar despot of the family;
+and assuming the new character of a fine lady, she could never forgive
+the contempt which was sometimes visible in my countenance, when she
+uttered with pomposity her bad English, or affected to be well bred.
+
+To my uncle I ventured to open my heart; and he, with his wonted
+benevolence, began to consider in what manner he could extricate me out
+of my present irksome situation. In spite of his own disappointment, or,
+most probably, actuated by the feelings that had been petrified, not
+cooled, in all their sanguine fervour, like a boiling torrent of lava
+suddenly dashing into the sea, he thought a marriage of mutual
+inclination (would envious stars permit it) the only chance for happiness
+in this disastrous world. George Venables had the reputation of being
+attentive to business, and my father's example gave great weight to this
+circumstance; for habits of order in business would, he conceived, extend
+to the regulation of the affections in domestic life. George seldom spoke
+in my uncle's company, except to utter a short, judicious question, or to
+make a pertinent remark, with all due deference to his superior judgment;
+so that my uncle seldom left his company without observing, that the
+young man had more in him than people supposed.
+
+In this opinion he was not singular; yet, believe me, and I am not swayed
+by resentment, these speeches so justly poized, this silent deference,
+when the animal spirits of other young people were throwing off youthful
+ebullitions, were not the effect of thought or humility, but sheer
+barrenness of mind, and want of imagination. A colt of mettle will curvet
+and shew his paces. Yes; my dear girl, these prudent young men want all
+the fire necessary to ferment their faculties, and are characterized as
+wise, only because they are not foolish. It is true, that George was by
+no means so great a favourite of mine as during the first year of our
+acquaintance; still, as he often coincided in opinion with me, and echoed
+my sentiments; and having myself no other attachment, I heard with
+pleasure my uncle's proposal; but thought more of obtaining my freedom,
+than of my lover. But, when George, seemingly anxious for my happiness,
+pressed me to quit my present painful situation, my heart swelled with
+gratitude--I knew not that my uncle had promised him five thousand
+pounds.
+
+Had this truly generous man mentioned his intention to me, I should have
+insisted on a thousand pounds being settled on each of my sisters; George
+would have contested; I should have seen his selfish soul; and--gracious
+God! have been spared the misery of discovering, when too late, that I
+was united to a heartless, unprincipled wretch. All my schemes of
+usefulness would not then have been blasted. The tenderness of my heart
+would not have heated my imagination with visions of the ineffable
+delight of happy love; nor would the sweet duty of a mother have been so
+cruelly interrupted.
+
+But I must not suffer the fortitude I have so hardly acquired, to be
+undermined by unavailing regret. Let me hasten forward to describe the
+turbid stream in which I had to wade--but let me exultingly declare that
+it is passed--my soul holds fellowship with him no more. He cut the
+Gordian knot, which my principles, mistaken ones, respected; he dissolved
+the tie, the fetters rather, that ate into my very vitals--and I should
+rejoice, conscious that my mind is freed, though confined in hell itself;
+the only place that even fancy can imagine more dreadful than my present
+abode.
+
+These varying emotions will not allow me to proceed. I heave sigh after
+sigh; yet my heart is still oppressed. For what am I reserved? Why was I
+not born a man, or why was I born at all?
+
+
+END OF VOL. I.
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.
+
+VOL. II.
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. II.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+
+THE
+
+WRONGS OF WOMAN:
+
+OR,
+
+MARIA.
+
+A FRAGMENT.
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+
+VOL. II.
+
+
+
+
+_WRONGS_
+
+OF
+
+WOMAN.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. IX.
+
+
+"I RESUME my pen to fly from thought. I was married; and we hastened to
+London. I had purposed taking one of my sisters with me; for a strong
+motive for marrying, was the desire of having a home at which I could
+receive them, now their own grew so uncomfortable, as not to deserve the
+cheering appellation. An objection was made to her accompanying me, that
+appeared plausible; and I reluctantly acquiesced. I was however willingly
+allowed to take with me Molly, poor Peggy's daughter. London and
+preferment, are ideas commonly associated in the country; and, as
+blooming as May, she bade adieu to Peggy with weeping eyes. I did not
+even feel hurt at the refusal in relation to my sister, till hearing what
+my uncle had done for me, I had the simplicity to request, speaking with
+warmth of their situation, that he would give them a thousand pounds
+a-piece, which seemed to me but justice. He asked me, giving me a kiss,
+'If I had lost my senses?' I started back, as if I had found a wasp in a
+rose-bush. I expostulated. He sneered; and the demon of discord entered
+our paradise, to poison with his pestiferous breath every opening joy.
+
+"I had sometimes observed defects in my husband's understanding; but, led
+astray by a prevailing opinion, that goodness of disposition is of the
+first importance in the relative situations of life, in proportion as I
+perceived the narrowness of his understanding, fancy enlarged the
+boundary of his heart. Fatal error! How quickly is the so much vaunted
+milkiness of nature turned into gall, by an intercourse with the world,
+if more generous juices do not sustain the vital source of virtue!
+
+"One trait in my character was extreme credulity; but, when my eyes were
+once opened, I saw but too clearly all I had before overlooked. My
+husband was sunk in my esteem; still there are youthful emotions, which,
+for a while, fill up the chasm of love and friendship. Besides, it
+required some time to enable me to see his whole character in a just
+light, or rather to allow it to become fixed. While circumstances were
+ripening my faculties, and cultivating my taste, commerce and gross
+relaxations were shutting his against any possibility of improvement,
+till, by stifling every spark of virtue in himself, he began to imagine
+that it no where existed.
+
+"Do not let me lead you astray, my child, I do not mean to assert, that
+any human being is entirely incapable of feeling the generous emotions,
+which are the foundation of every true principle of virtue; but they are
+frequently, I fear, so feeble, that, like the inflammable quality which
+more or less lurks in all bodies, they often lie for ever dormant; the
+circumstances never occurring, necessary to call them into action.
+
+"I discovered however by chance, that, in consequence of some losses in
+trade, the natural effect of his gambling desire to start suddenly into
+riches, the five thousand pounds given me by my uncle, had been paid very
+opportunely. This discovery, strange as you may think the assertion, gave
+me pleasure; my husband's embarrassments endeared him to me. I was glad
+to find an excuse for his conduct to my sisters, and my mind became
+calmer.
+
+"My uncle introduced me to some literary society; and the theatres were a
+never-failing source of amusement to me. My delighted eye followed Mrs.
+Siddons, when, with dignified delicacy, she played Calista; and I
+involuntarily repeated after her, in the same tone, and with a
+long-drawn sigh,
+
+    'Hearts like our's were pair'd--not match'd.'
+
+"These were, at first, spontaneous emotions, though, becoming acquainted
+with men of wit and polished manners, I could not sometimes help
+regretting my early marriage; and that, in my haste to escape from a
+temporary dependence, and expand my newly fledged wings, in an unknown
+sky, I had been caught in a trap, and caged for life. Still the novelty
+of London, and the attentive fondness of my husband, for he had some
+personal regard for me, made several months glide away. Yet, not
+forgetting the situation of my sisters, who were still very young, I
+prevailed on my uncle to settle a thousand pounds on each; and to place
+them in a school near town, where I could frequently visit, as well as
+have them at home with me.
+
+"I now tried to improve my husband's taste, but we had few subjects in
+common; indeed he soon appeared to have little relish for my society,
+unless he was hinting to me the use he could make of my uncle's wealth.
+When we had company, I was disgusted by an ostentatious display of
+riches, and I have often quitted the room, to avoid listening to
+exaggerated tales of money obtained by lucky hits.
+
+"With all my attention and affectionate interest, I perceived that I
+could not become the friend or confident of my husband. Every thing I
+learned relative to his affairs I gathered up by accident; and I vainly
+endeavoured to establish, at our fire-side, that social converse, which
+often renders people of different characters dear to each other.
+Returning from the theatre, or any amusing party, I frequently began to
+relate what I had seen and highly relished; but with sullen taciturnity
+he soon silenced me. I seemed therefore gradually to lose, in his
+society, the soul, the energies of which had just been in action. To such
+a degree, in fact, did his cold, reserved manner affect me, that, after
+spending some days with him alone, I have imagined myself the most stupid
+creature in the world, till the abilities of some casual visitor
+convinced me that I had some dormant animation, and sentiments above the
+dust in which I had been groveling. The very countenance of my husband
+changed; his complexion became sallow, and all the charms of youth were
+vanishing with its vivacity.
+
+"I give you one view of the subject; but these experiments and
+alterations took up the space of five years; during which period, I had
+most reluctantly extorted several sums from my uncle, to save my husband,
+to use his own words, from destruction. At first it was to prevent bills
+being noted, to the injury of his credit; then to bail him; and
+afterwards to prevent an execution from entering the house. I began at
+last to conclude, that he would have made more exertions of his own to
+extricate himself, had he not relied on mine, cruel as was the task he
+imposed on me; and I firmly determined that I would make use of no more
+pretexts.
+
+"From the moment I pronounced this determination, indifference on his
+part was changed into rudeness, or something worse.
+
+"He now seldom dined at home, and continually returned at a late hour,
+drunk, to bed. I retired to another apartment; I was glad, I own, to
+escape from his; for personal intimacy without affection, seemed, to me
+the most degrading, as well as the most painful state in which a woman of
+any taste, not to speak of the peculiar delicacy of fostered sensibility,
+could be placed. But my husband's fondness for women was of the grossest
+kind, and imagination was so wholly out of the question, as to render his
+indulgences of this sort entirely promiscuous, and of the most brutal
+nature. My health suffered, before my heart was entirely estranged by the
+loathsome information; could I then have returned to his sullied arms,
+but as a victim to the prejudices of mankind, who have made women the
+property of their husbands? I discovered even, by his conversation, when
+intoxicated, that his favourites were wantons of the lowest class, who
+could by their vulgar, indecent mirth, which he called nature, rouse his
+sluggish spirits. Meretricious ornaments and manners were necessary to
+attract his attention. He seldom looked twice at a modest woman, and sat
+silent in their company; and the charms of youth and beauty had not the
+slightest effect on his senses, unless the possessors were initiated in
+vice. His intimacy with profligate women, and his habits of thinking,
+gave him a contempt for female endowments; and he would repeat, when
+wine had loosed his tongue, most of the common-place sarcasms levelled at
+them, by men who do not allow them to have minds, because mind would be
+an impediment to gross enjoyment. Men who are inferior to their fellow
+men, are always most anxious to establish their superiority over women.
+But where are these reflections leading me?
+
+"Women who have lost their husband's affection, are justly reproved for
+neglecting their persons, and not taking the same pains to keep, as to
+gain a heart; but who thinks of giving the same advice to men, though
+women are continually stigmatized for being attached to fops; and from
+the nature of their education, are more susceptible of disgust? Yet why a
+woman should be expected to endure a sloven, with more patience than a
+man, and magnanimously to govern herself, I cannot conceive; unless it be
+supposed arrogant in her to look for respect as well as a maintenance. It
+is not easy to be pleased, because, after promising to love, in different
+circumstances, we are told that it is our duty. I cannot, I am sure
+(though, when attending the sick, I never felt disgust) forget my own
+sensations, when rising with health and spirit, and after scenting the
+sweet morning, I have met my husband at the breakfast table. The active
+attention I had been giving to domestic regulations, which were generally
+settled before he rose, or a walk, gave a glow to my countenance, that
+contrasted with his squallid appearance. The squeamishness of stomach
+alone, produced by the last night's intemperance, which he took no pains
+to conceal, destroyed my appetite. I think I now see him lolling in an
+arm-chair, in a dirty powdering gown, soiled linen, ungartered stockings,
+and tangled hair, yawning and stretching himself. The newspaper was
+immediately called for, if not brought in on the tea-board, from which he
+would scarcely lift his eyes while I poured out the tea, excepting to ask
+for some brandy to put into it, or to declare that he could not eat. In
+answer to any question, in his best humour, it was a drawling 'What do
+you say, child?' But if I demanded money for the house expences, which I
+put off till the last moment, his customary reply, often prefaced with an
+oath, was, 'Do you think me, madam, made of money?'--The butcher, the
+baker, must wait; and, what was worse, I was often obliged to witness
+his surly dismission of tradesmen, who were in want of their money, and
+whom I sometimes paid with the presents my uncle gave me for my own use.
+
+"At this juncture my father's mistress, by terrifying his conscience,
+prevailed on him to marry her; he was already become a methodist; and my
+brother, who now practised for himself, had discovered a flaw in the
+settlement made on my mother's children, which set it aside, and he
+allowed my father, whose distress made him submit to any thing, a tithe
+of his own, or rather our fortune.
+
+"My sisters had left school, but were unable to endure home, which my
+father's wife rendered as disagreeable as possible, to get rid of girls
+whom she regarded as spies on her conduct. They were accomplished, yet
+you can (may you never be reduced to the same destitute state!) scarcely
+conceive the trouble I had to place them in the situation of governesses,
+the only one in which even a well-educated woman, with more than ordinary
+talents, can struggle for a subsistence; and even this is a dependence
+next to menial. Is it then surprising, that so many forlorn women, with
+human passions and feelings, take refuge in infamy? Alone in large
+mansions, I say alone, because they had no companions with whom they
+could converse on equal terms, or from whom they could expect the
+endearments of affection, they grew melancholy, and the sound of joy made
+them sad; and the youngest, having a more delicate frame, fell into a
+decline. It was with great difficulty that I, who now almost supported
+the house by loans from my uncle, could prevail on the _master_ of it, to
+allow her a room to die in. I watched her sick bed for some months, and
+then closed her eyes, gentle spirit! for ever. She was pretty, with very
+engaging manners; yet had never an opportunity to marry, excepting to a
+very old man. She had abilities sufficient to have shone in any
+profession, had there been any professions for women, though she shrunk
+at the name of milliner or mantua-maker as degrading to a gentlewoman. I
+would not term this feeling false pride to any one but you, my child,
+whom I fondly hope to see (yes; I will indulge the hope for a moment!)
+possessed of that energy of character which gives dignity to any station;
+and with that clear, firm spirit that will enable you to choose a
+situation for yourself, or submit to be classed in the lowest, if it be
+the only one in which you can be the mistress of your own actions.
+
+"Soon after the death of my sister, an incident occurred, to prove to me
+that the heart of a libertine is dead to natural affection; and to
+convince me, that the being who has appeared all tenderness, to gratify a
+selfish passion, is as regardless of the innocent fruit of it, as of the
+object, when the fit is over. I had casually observed an old,
+mean-looking woman, who called on my husband every two or three months to
+receive some money. One day entering the passage of his little
+counting-house, as she was going out, I heard her say, 'The child is very
+weak; she cannot live long, she will soon die out of your way, so you
+need not grudge her a little physic.'
+
+"'So much the better,' he replied, 'and pray mind your own business, good
+woman.'
+
+"I was struck by his unfeeling, inhuman tone of voice, and drew back,
+determined when the woman came again, to try to speak to her, not out of
+curiosity, I had heard enough, but with the hope of being useful to a
+poor, outcast girl.
+
+"A month or two elapsed before I saw this woman again; and then she had a
+child in her hand that tottered along, scarcely able to sustain her own
+weight. They were going away, to return at the hour Mr. Venables was
+expected; he was now from home. I desired the woman to walk into the
+parlour. She hesitated, yet obeyed. I assured her that I should not
+mention to my husband (the word seemed to weigh on my respiration), that
+I had seen her, or his child. The woman stared at me with astonishment;
+and I turned my eyes on the squalid object [that accompanied her.] She
+could hardly support herself, her complexion was sallow, and her eyes
+inflamed, with an indescribable look of cunning, mixed with the wrinkles
+produced by the peevishness of pain.
+
+"'Poor child!' I exclaimed. 'Ah! you may well say poor child,' replied
+the woman. 'I brought her here to see whether he would have the heart to
+look at her, and not get some advice. I do not know what they deserve who
+nursed her. Why, her legs bent under her like a bow when she came to me,
+and she has never been well since; but, if they were no better paid than
+I am, it is not to be wondered at, sure enough.'
+
+"On further enquiry I was informed, that this miserable spectacle was the
+daughter of a servant, a country girl, who caught Mr. Venables' eye, and
+whom he seduced. On his marriage he sent her away, her situation being
+too visible. After her delivery, she was thrown on the town; and died in
+an hospital within the year. The babe was sent to a parish-nurse, and
+afterwards to this woman, who did not seem much better; but what was to
+be expected from such a close bargain? She was only paid three shillings
+a week for board and washing.
+
+"The woman begged me to give her some old clothes for the child, assuring
+me, that she was almost afraid to ask master for money to buy even a
+pair of shoes.
+
+"I grew sick at heart. And, fearing Mr. Venables might enter, and oblige
+me to express my abhorrence, I hastily enquired where she lived, promised
+to pay her two shillings a week more, and to call on her in a day or two;
+putting a trifle into her hand as a proof of my good intention.
+
+"If the state of this child affected me, what were my feelings at a
+discovery I made respecting Peggy----?[22-A]
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[22-A] The manuscript is imperfect here. An episode seems to have been
+intended, which was never committed to paper.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. X.
+
+
+"MY father's situation was now so distressing, that I prevailed on my
+uncle to accompany me to visit him; and to lend me his assistance, to
+prevent the whole property of the family from becoming the prey of my
+brother's rapacity; for, to extricate himself out of present
+difficulties, my father was totally regardless of futurity. I took down
+with me some presents for my step-mother; it did not require an effort
+for me to treat her with civility, or to forget the past.
+
+"This was the first time I had visited my native village, since my
+marriage. But with what different emotions did I return from the busy
+world, with a heavy weight of experience benumbing my imagination, to
+scenes, that whispered recollections of joy and hope most eloquently to
+my heart! The first scent of the wild flowers from the heath, thrilled
+through my veins, awakening every sense to pleasure. The icy hand of
+despair seemed to be removed from my bosom; and--forgetting my
+husband--the nurtured visions of a romantic mind, bursting on me with all
+their original wildness and gay exuberance, were again hailed as sweet
+realities. I forgot, with equal facility, that I ever felt sorrow, or
+knew care in the country; while a transient rainbow stole athwart the
+cloudy sky of despondency. The picturesque form of several favourite
+trees, and the porches of rude cottages, with their smiling hedges, were
+recognized with the gladsome playfulness of childish vivacity. I could
+have kissed the chickens that pecked on the common; and longed to pat the
+cows, and frolic with the dogs that sported on it. I gazed with delight
+on the windmill, and thought it lucky that it should be in motion, at the
+moment I passed by; and entering the dear green lane, which led directly
+to the village, the sound of the well-known rookery gave that sentimental
+tinge to the varying sensations of my active soul, which only served to
+heighten the lustre of the luxuriant scenery. But, spying, as I advanced,
+the spire, peeping over the withered tops of the aged elms that composed
+the rookery, my thoughts flew immediately to the church-yard, and tears
+of affection, such was the effect of my imagination, bedewed my mother's
+grave! Sorrow gave place to devotional feelings. I wandered through the
+church in fancy, as I used sometimes to do on a Saturday evening. I
+recollected with what fervour I addressed the God of my youth: and once
+more with rapturous love looked above my sorrows to the Father of nature.
+I pause--feeling forcibly all the emotions I am describing; and
+(reminded, as I register my sorrows, of the sublime calm I have felt,
+when in some tremendous solitude, my soul rested on itself, and seemed to
+fill the universe) I insensibly breathe soft, hushing every wayward
+emotion, as if fearing to sully with a sigh, a contentment so extatic.
+
+"Having settled my father's affairs, and, by my exertions in his favour,
+made my brother my sworn foe, I returned to London. My husband's conduct
+was now changed; I had during my absence, received several affectionate,
+penitential letters from him; and he seemed on my arrival, to wish by his
+behaviour to prove his sincerity. I could not then conceive why he acted
+thus; and, when the suspicion darted into my head, that it might arise
+from observing my increasing influence with my uncle, I almost despised
+myself for imagining that such a degree of debasing selfishness could
+exist.
+
+"He became, unaccountable as was the change, tender and attentive; and,
+attacking my weak side, made a confession of his follies, and lamented
+the embarrassments in which I, who merited a far different fate, might be
+involved. He besought me to aid him with my counsel, praised my
+understanding, and appealed to the tenderness of my heart.
+
+"This conduct only inspired me with compassion. I wished to be his
+friend; but love had spread his rosy pinions, and fled far, far away; and
+had not (like some exquisite perfumes, the fine spirit of which is
+continually mingling with the air) left a fragrance behind, to mark where
+he had shook his wings. My husband's renewed caresses then became hateful
+to me; his brutality was tolerable, compared to his distasteful fondness.
+Still, compassion, and the fear of insulting his supposed feelings, by a
+want of sympathy, made me dissemble, and do violence to my delicacy. What
+a task!
+
+"Those who support a system of what I term false refinement, and will
+not allow great part of love in the female, as well as male breast, to
+spring in some respects involuntarily, may not admit that charms are as
+necessary to feed the passion, as virtues to convert the mellowing spirit
+into friendship. To such observers I have nothing to say, any more than
+to the moralists, who insist that women ought to, and can love their
+husbands, because it is their duty. To you, my child, I may add, with a
+heart tremblingly alive to your future conduct, some observations,
+dictated by my present feelings, on calmly reviewing this period of my
+life. When novelists or moralists praise as a virtue, a woman's coldness
+of constitution, and want of passion; and make her yield to the ardour of
+her lover out of sheer compassion, or to promote a frigid plan of future
+comfort, I am disgusted. They may be good women, in the ordinary
+acceptation of the phrase, and do no harm; but they appear to me not to
+have those 'finely fashioned nerves,' which render the senses exquisite.
+They may possess tenderness; but they want that fire of the imagination,
+which produces _active_ sensibility, and _positive_ virtue. How does the
+woman deserve to be characterized, who marries one man, with a heart and
+imagination devoted to another? Is she not an object of pity or contempt,
+when thus sacrilegiously violating the purity of her own feelings? Nay,
+it is as indelicate, when she is indifferent, unless she be
+constitutionally insensible; then indeed it is a mere affair of barter;
+and I have nothing to do with the secrets of trade. Yes; eagerly as I
+wish you to possess true rectitude of mind, and purity of affection, I
+must insist that a heartless conduct is the contrary of virtuous. Truth
+is the only basis of virtue; and we cannot, without depraving our minds,
+endeavour to please a lover or husband, but in proportion as he pleases
+us. Men, more effectually to enslave us, may inculcate this partial
+morality, and lose sight of virtue in subdividing it into the duties of
+particular stations; but let us not blush for nature without a cause!
+
+"After these remarks, I am ashamed to own, that I was pregnant. The
+greatest sacrifice of my principles in my whole life, was the allowing my
+husband again to be familiar with my person, though to this cruel act of
+self-denial, when I wished the earth to open and swallow me, you owe your
+birth; and I the unutterable pleasure of being a mother. There was
+something of delicacy in my husband's bridal attentions; but now his
+tainted breath, pimpled face, and blood-shot eyes, were not more
+repugnant to my senses, than his gross manners, and loveless familiarity
+to my taste.
+
+"A man would only be expected to maintain; yes, barely grant a
+subsistence, to a woman rendered odious by habitual intoxication; but who
+would expect him, or think it possible to love her? And unless 'youth,
+and genial years were flown,' it would be thought equally unreasonable to
+insist, [under penalty of] forfeiting almost every thing reckoned
+valuable in life, that he should not love another: whilst woman, weak in
+reason, impotent in will, is required to moralize, sentimentalize herself
+to stone, and pine her life away, labouring to reform her embruted mate.
+He may even spend in dissipation, and intemperance, the very intemperance
+which renders him so hateful, her property, and by stinting her expences,
+not permit her to beguile in society, a wearisome, joyless life; for over
+their mutual fortune she has no power, it must all pass through his hand.
+And if she be a mother, and in the present state of women, it is a great
+misfortune to be prevented from discharging the duties, and cultivating
+the affections of one, what has she not to endure?--But I have suffered
+the tenderness of one to lead me into reflections that I did not think of
+making, to interrupt my narrative--yet the full heart will overflow.
+
+"Mr. Venables' embarrassments did not now endear him to me; still,
+anxious to befriend him, I endeavoured to prevail on him to retrench his
+expences; but he had always some plausible excuse to give, to justify his
+not following my advice. Humanity, compassion, and the interest produced
+by a habit of living together, made me try to relieve, and sympathize
+with him; but, when I recollected that I was bound to live with such a
+being for ever--my heart died within me; my desire of improvement became
+languid, and baleful, corroding melancholy took possession of my soul.
+Marriage had bastilled me for life. I discovered in myself a capacity for
+the enjoyment of the various pleasures existence affords; yet, fettered
+by the partial laws of society, this fair globe was to me an universal
+blank.
+
+"When I exhorted my husband to economy, I referred to himself. I was
+obliged to practise the most rigid, or contract debts, which I had too
+much reason to fear would never be paid. I despised this paltry privilege
+of a wife, which can only be of use to the vicious or inconsiderate, and
+determined not to increase the torrent that was bearing him down. I was
+then ignorant of the extent of his fraudulent speculations, whom I was
+bound to honour and obey.
+
+"A woman neglected by her husband, or whose manners form a striking
+contrast with his, will always have men on the watch to soothe and
+flatter her. Besides, the forlorn state of a neglected woman, not
+destitute of personal charms, is particularly interesting, and rouses
+that species of pity, which is so near akin, it easily slides into love.
+A man of feeling thinks not of seducing, he is himself seduced by all the
+noblest emotions of his soul. He figures to himself all the sacrifices a
+woman of sensibility must make, and every situation in which his
+imagination places her, touches his heart, and fires his passions.
+Longing to take to his bosom the shorn lamb, and bid the drooping buds of
+hope revive, benevolence changes into passion: and should he then
+discover that he is beloved, honour binds him fast, though foreseeing
+that he may afterwards be obliged to pay severe damages to the man, who
+never appeared to value his wife's society, till he found that there was
+a chance of his being indemnified for the loss of it.
+
+"Such are the partial laws enacted by men; for, only to lay a stress on
+the dependent state of a woman in the grand question of the comforts
+arising from the possession of property, she is [even in this article]
+much more injured by the loss of the husband's affection, than he by that
+of his wife; yet where is she, condemned to the solitude of a deserted
+home, to look for a compensation from the woman, who seduces him from
+her? She cannot drive an unfaithful husband from his house, nor separate,
+or tear, his children from him, however culpable he may be; and he, still
+the master of his own fate, enjoys the smiles of a world, that would
+brand her with infamy, did she, seeking consolation, venture to
+retaliate.
+
+"These remarks are not dictated by experience; but merely by the
+compassion I feel for many amiable women, the _out-laws_ of the world.
+For myself, never encouraging any of the advances that were made to me,
+my lovers dropped off like the untimely shoots of spring. I did not even
+coquet with them; because I found, on examining myself, I could not
+coquet with a man without loving him a little; and I perceived that I
+should not be able to stop at the line of what are termed _innocent
+freedoms_, did I suffer any. My reserve was then the consequence of
+delicacy. Freedom of conduct has emancipated many women's minds; but my
+conduct has most rigidly been governed by my principles, till the
+improvement of my understanding has enabled me to discern the fallacy of
+prejudices at war with nature and reason.
+
+"Shortly after the change I have mentioned in my husband's conduct, my
+uncle was compelled by his declining health, to seek the succour of a
+milder climate, and embark for Lisbon. He left his will in the hands of a
+friend, an eminent solicitor; he had previously questioned me relative to
+my situation and state of mind, and declared very freely, that he could
+place no reliance on the stability of my husband's professions. He had
+been deceived in the unfolding of his character; he now thought it fixed
+in a train of actions that would inevitably lead to ruin and disgrace.
+
+"The evening before his departure, which we spent alone together, he
+folded me to his heart, uttering the endearing appellation of
+'child.'--My more than father! why was I not permitted to perform the
+last duties of one, and smooth the pillow of death? He seemed by his
+manner to be convinced that he should never see me more; yet requested
+me, most earnestly, to come to him, should I be obliged to leave my
+husband. He had before expressed his sorrow at hearing of my pregnancy,
+having determined to prevail on me to accompany him, till I informed him
+of that circumstance. He expressed himself unfeignedly sorry that any new
+tie should bind me to a man whom he thought so incapable of estimating my
+value; such was the kind language of affection.
+
+"I must repeat his own words; they made an indelible impression on my
+mind:
+
+"'The marriage state is certainly that in which women, generally
+speaking, can be most useful; but I am far from thinking that a woman,
+once married, ought to consider the engagement as indissoluble
+(especially if there be no children to reward her for sacrificing her
+feelings) in case her husband merits neither her love, nor esteem. Esteem
+will often supply the place of love; and prevent a woman from being
+wretched, though it may not make her happy. The magnitude of a sacrifice
+ought always to bear some proportion to the utility in view; and for a
+woman to live with a man, for whom she can cherish neither affection nor
+esteem, or even be of any use to him, excepting in the light of a
+house-keeper, is an abjectness of condition, the enduring of which no
+concurrence of circumstances can ever make a duty in the sight of God or
+just men. If indeed she submits to it merely to be maintained in
+idleness, she has no right to complain bitterly of her fate; or to act,
+as a person of independent character might, as if she had a title to
+disregard general rules.
+
+"'But the misfortune is, that many women only submit in appearance, and
+forfeit their own respect to secure their reputation in the world. The
+situation of a woman separated from her husband, is undoubtedly very
+different from that of a man who has left his wife. He, with lordly
+dignity, has shaken of a clog; and the allowing her food and raiment, is
+thought sufficient to secure his reputation from taint. And, should she
+have been inconsiderate, he will be celebrated for his generosity and
+forbearance. Such is the respect paid to the master-key of property! A
+woman, on the contrary, resigning what is termed her natural protector
+(though he never was so, but in name) is despised and shunned, for
+asserting the independence of mind distinctive of a rational being, and
+spurning at slavery.'
+
+"During the remainder of the evening, my uncle's tenderness led him
+frequently to revert to the subject, and utter, with increasing warmth,
+sentiments to the same purport. At length it was necessary to say
+'Farewell!'--and we parted--gracious God! to meet no more.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XI.
+
+
+"A GENTLEMAN of large fortune and of polished manners, had lately visited
+very frequently at our house, and treated me, if possible, with more
+respect than Mr. Venables paid him; my pregnancy was not yet visible, his
+society was a great relief to me, as I had for some time past, to avoid
+expence, confined myself very much at home. I ever disdained unnecessary,
+perhaps even prudent concealments; and my husband, with great ease,
+discovered the amount of my uncle's parting present. A copy of a writ was
+the stale pretext to extort it from me; and I had soon reason to believe
+that it was fabricated for the purpose. I acknowledge my folly in thus
+suffering myself to be continually imposed on. I had adhered to my
+resolution not to apply to my uncle, on the part of my husband, any more;
+yet, when I had received a sum sufficient to supply my own wants, and to
+enable me to pursue a plan I had in view, to settle my younger brother in
+a respectable employment, I allowed myself to be duped by Mr. Venables'
+shallow pretences, and hypocritical professions.
+
+"Thus did he pillage me and my family, thus frustrate all my plans of
+usefulness. Yet this was the man I was bound to respect and esteem: as if
+respect and esteem depended on an arbitrary will of our own! But a wife
+being as much a man's property as his horse, or his ass, she has nothing
+she can call her own. He may use any means to get at what the law
+considers as his, the moment his wife is in possession of it, even to the
+forcing of a lock, as Mr. Venables did, to search for notes in my
+writing-desk--and all this is done with a show of equity, because,
+forsooth, he is responsible for her maintenance.
+
+"The tender mother cannot _lawfully_ snatch from the gripe of the
+gambling spendthrift, or beastly drunkard, unmindful of his offspring,
+the fortune which falls to her by chance; or (so flagrant is the
+injustice) what she earns by her own exertions. No; he can rob her with
+impunity, even to waste publicly on a courtezan; and the laws of her
+country--if women have a country--afford her no protection or redress
+from the oppressor, unless she have the plea of bodily fear; yet how
+many ways are there of goading the soul almost to madness, equally
+unmanly, though not so mean? When such laws were framed, should not
+impartial lawgivers have first decreed, in the style of a great assembly,
+who recognized the existence of an _être suprême_, to fix the national
+belief, that the husband should always be wiser and more virtuous than
+his wife, in order to entitle him, with a show of justice, to keep this
+idiot, or perpetual minor, for ever in bondage. But I must have done--on
+this subject, my indignation continually runs away with me.
+
+"The company of the gentleman I have already mentioned, who had a general
+acquaintance with literature and subjects of taste, was grateful to me;
+my countenance brightened up as he approached, and I unaffectedly
+expressed the pleasure I felt. The amusement his conversation afforded
+me, made it easy to comply with my husband's request, to endeavour to
+render our house agreeable to him.
+
+"His attentions became more pointed; but, as I was not of the number of
+women, whose virtue, as it is termed, immediately takes alarm, I
+endeavoured, rather by raillery than serious expostulation, to give a
+different turn to his conversation. He assumed a new mode of attack, and
+I was, for a while, the dupe of his pretended friendship.
+
+"I had, merely in the style of _badinage_, boasted of my conquest, and
+repeated his lover-like compliments to my husband. But he begged me, for
+God's sake, not to affront his friend, or I should destroy all his
+projects, and be his ruin. Had I had more affection for my husband, I
+should have expressed my contempt of this time-serving politeness: now I
+imagined that I only felt pity; yet it would have puzzled a casuist to
+point out in what the exact difference consisted.
+
+"This friend began now, in confidence, to discover to me the real state
+of my husband's affairs. 'Necessity,' said Mr. S----; why should I reveal
+his name? for he affected to palliate the conduct he could not excuse,
+'had led him to take such steps, by accommodation bills, buying goods on
+credit, to sell them for ready money, and similar transactions, that his
+character in the commercial world was gone. He was considered,' he added,
+lowering his voice, 'on 'Change as a swindler.'
+
+"I felt at that moment the first maternal pang. Aware of the evils my sex
+have to struggle with, I still wished, for my own consolation, to be the
+mother of a daughter; and I could not bear to think, that the _sins_ of
+her father's entailed disgrace, should be added to the ills to which
+woman is heir.
+
+"So completely was I deceived by these shows of friendship (nay, I
+believe, according to his interpretation, Mr. S--really was my friend)
+that I began to consult him respecting the best mode of retrieving my
+husband's character: it is the good name of a woman only that sets to
+rise no more. I knew not that he had been drawn into a whirlpool, out of
+which he had not the energy to attempt to escape. He seemed indeed
+destitute of the power of employing his faculties in any regular
+pursuit. His principles of action were so loose, and his mind so
+uncultivated, that every thing like order appeared to him in the shape of
+restraint; and, like men in the savage state, he required the strong
+stimulus of hope or fear, produced by wild speculations, in which the
+interests of others went for nothing, to keep his spirits awake. He one
+time possessed patriotism, but he knew not what it was to feel honest
+indignation; and pretended to be an advocate for liberty, when, with as
+little affection for the human race as for individuals, he thought of
+nothing but his own gratification. He was just such a citizen, as a
+father. The sums he adroitly obtained by a violation of the laws of his
+country, as well as those of humanity, he would allow a mistress to
+squander; though she was, with the same _sang froid_, consigned, as were
+his children, to poverty, when another proved more attractive.
+
+"On various pretences, his friend continued to visit me; and, observing
+my want of money, he tried to induce me to accept of pecuniary aid; but
+this offer I absolutely rejected, though it was made with such delicacy,
+I could not be displeased.
+
+"One day he came, as I thought accidentally, to dinner. My husband was
+very much engaged in business, and quitted the room soon after the cloth
+was removed. We conversed as usual, till confidential advice led again to
+love. I was extremely mortified. I had a sincere regard for him, and
+hoped that he had an equal friendship for me. I therefore began mildly to
+expostulate with him. This gentleness he mistook for coy encouragement;
+and he would not be diverted from the subject. Perceiving his mistake, I
+seriously asked him how, using such language to me, he could profess to
+be my husband's friend? A significant sneer excited my curiosity, and he,
+supposing this to be my only scruple, took a letter deliberately out of
+his pocket, saying, 'Your husband's honour is not inflexible. How could
+you, with your discernment, think it so? Why, he left the room this very
+day on purpose to give me an opportunity to explain myself; _he_ thought
+me too timid--too tardy.'
+
+"I snatched the letter with indescribable emotion. The purport of it was
+to invite him to dinner, and to ridicule his chivalrous respect for me.
+He assured him, 'that every woman had her price, and, with gross
+indecency, hinted, that he should be glad to have the duty of a husband
+taken off his hands. These he termed _liberal sentiments_. He advised him
+not to shock my romantic notions, but to attack my credulous generosity,
+and weak pity; and concluded with requesting him to lend him five hundred
+pounds for a month or six weeks.' I read this letter twice over; and the
+firm purpose it inspired, calmed the rising tumult of my soul. I rose
+deliberately, requested Mr. S---- to wait a moment, and instantly going
+into the counting-house, desired Mr. Venables to return with me to the
+dining-parlour.
+
+"He laid down his pen, and entered with me, without observing any change
+in my countenance. I shut the door, and, giving him the letter, simply
+asked, 'whether he wrote it, or was it a forgery?'
+
+"Nothing could equal his confusion. His friend's eye met his, and he
+muttered something about a joke--But I interrupted him--'It is
+sufficient--We part for ever.'
+
+"I continued, with solemnity, 'I have borne with your tyranny and
+infidelities. I disdain to utter what I have borne with. I thought you
+unprincipled, but not so decidedly vicious. I formed a tie, in the sight
+of heaven--I have held it sacred; even when men, more conformable to my
+taste, have made me feel--I despise all subterfuge!--that I was not dead
+to love. Neglected by you, I have resolutely stifled the enticing
+emotions, and respected the plighted faith you outraged. And you dare now
+to insult me, by selling me to prostitution!--Yes--equally lost to
+delicacy and principle--you dared sacrilegiously to barter the honour of
+the mother of your child.'
+
+"Then, turning to Mr. S----, I added, 'I call on you, Sir, to witness,'
+and I lifted my hands and eyes to heaven, 'that, as solemnly as I took
+his name, I now abjure it,' I pulled off my ring, and put it on the
+table; 'and that I mean immediately to quit his house, never to enter it
+more. I will provide for myself and child. I leave him as free as I am
+determined to be myself--he shall be answerable for no debts of mine.'
+
+"Astonishment closed their lips, till Mr. Venables, gently pushing his
+friend, with a forced smile, out of the room, nature for a moment
+prevailed, and, appearing like himself, he turned round, burning with
+rage, to me: but there was no terror in the frown, excepting when
+contrasted with the malignant smile which preceded it. He bade me 'leave
+the house at my peril; told me he despised my threats; I had no resource;
+I could not swear the peace against him!--I was not afraid of my
+life!--he had never struck me!'
+
+"He threw the letter in the fire, which I had incautiously left in his
+hands; and, quitting the room, locked the door on me.
+
+"When left alone, I was a moment or two before I could recollect myself.
+One scene had succeeded another with such rapidity, I almost doubted
+whether I was reflecting on a real event. 'Was it possible? Was I,
+indeed, free?'--Yes; free I termed myself, when I decidedly perceived
+the conduct I ought to adopt. How had I panted for liberty--liberty, that
+I would have purchased at any price, but that of my own esteem! I rose,
+and shook myself; opened the window, and methought the air never smelled
+so sweet. The face of heaven grew fairer as I viewed it, and the clouds
+seemed to flit away obedient to my wishes, to give my soul room to
+expand. I was all soul, and (wild as it may appear) felt as if I could
+have dissolved in the soft balmy gale that kissed my cheek, or have
+glided below the horizon on the glowing, descending beams. A seraphic
+satisfaction animated, without agitating my spirits; and my imagination
+collected, in visions sublimely terrible, or soothingly beautiful, an
+immense variety of the endless images, which nature affords, and fancy
+combines, of the grand and fair. The lustre of these bright picturesque
+sketches faded with the setting sun; but I was still alive to the calm
+delight they had diffused through my heart.
+
+"There may be advocates for matrimonial obedience, who, making a
+distinction between the duty of a wife and of a human being, may blame my
+conduct.--To them I write not--my feelings are not for them to analyze;
+and may you, my child, never be able to ascertain, by heart-rending
+experience, what your mother felt before the present emancipation of her
+mind!
+
+"I began to write a letter to my father, after closing one to my uncle;
+not to ask advice, but to signify my determination; when I was
+interrupted by the entrance of Mr. Venables. His manner was changed. His
+views on my uncle's fortune made him averse to my quitting his house, or
+he would, I am convinced, have been glad to have shaken off even the
+slight restraint my presence imposed on him; the restraint of showing me
+some respect. So far from having an affection for me, he really hated me,
+because he was convinced that I must despise him.
+
+"He told me, that, 'As I now had had time to cool and reflect, he did not
+doubt but that my prudence, and nice sense of propriety, would lead me to
+overlook what was passed.'
+
+"'Reflection,' I replied, 'had only confirmed my purpose, and no power on
+earth could divert me from it.'
+
+"Endeavouring to assume a soothing voice and look, when he would
+willingly have tortured me, to force me to feel his power, his
+countenance had an infernal expression, when he desired me, 'Not to
+expose myself to the servants, by obliging him to confine me in my
+apartment; if then I would give my promise not to quit the house
+precipitately, I should be free--and--.' I declared, interrupting him,
+'that I would promise nothing. I had no measures to keep with him--I was
+resolved, and would not condescend to subterfuge.'
+
+"He muttered, 'that I should soon repent of these preposterous airs;'
+and, ordering tea to be carried into my little study, which had a
+communication with my bed-chamber, he once more locked the door upon me,
+and left me to my own meditations. I had passively followed him up
+stairs, not wishing to fatigue myself with unavailing exertion.
+
+"Nothing calms the mind like a fixed purpose. I felt as if I had heaved
+a thousand weight from my heart; the atmosphere seemed lightened; and, if
+I execrated the institutions of society, which thus enable men to
+tyrannize over women, it was almost a disinterested sentiment. I
+disregarded present inconveniences, when my mind had done struggling with
+itself,--when reason and inclination had shaken hands and were at peace.
+I had no longer the cruel task before me, in endless perspective, aye,
+during the tedious for ever of life, of labouring to overcome my
+repugnance--of labouring to extinguish the hopes, the maybes of a lively
+imagination. Death I had hailed as my only chance for deliverance; but,
+while existence had still so many charms, and life promised happiness, I
+shrunk from the icy arms of an unknown tyrant, though far more inviting
+than those of the man, to whom I supposed myself bound without any other
+alternative; and was content to linger a little longer, waiting for I
+knew not what, rather than leave 'the warm precincts of the cheerful
+day,' and all the unenjoyed affection of my nature.
+
+"My present situation gave a new turn to my reflection; and I wondered
+(now the film seemed to be withdrawn, that obscured the piercing sight of
+reason) how I could, previously to the deciding outrage, have considered
+myself as everlastingly united to vice and folly? 'Had an evil genius
+cast a spell at my birth; or a demon stalked out of chaos, to perplex my
+understanding, and enchain my will, with delusive prejudices?'
+
+"I pursued this train of thinking; it led me out of myself, to expatiate
+on the misery peculiar to my sex. 'Are not,' I thought, 'the despots for
+ever stigmatized, who, in the wantonness of power, commanded even the
+most atrocious criminals to be chained to dead bodies? though surely
+those laws are much more inhuman, which forge adamantine fetters to bind
+minds together, that never can mingle in social communion! What indeed
+can equal the wretchedness of that state, in which there is no
+alternative, but to extinguish the affections, or encounter infamy?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XII.
+
+
+"TOWARDS midnight Mr. Venables entered my chamber; and, with calm
+audacity preparing to go to bed, he bade me make haste, 'for that was the
+best place for husbands and wives to end their differences. He had been
+drinking plentifully to aid his courage.
+
+"I did not at first deign to reply. But perceiving that he affected to
+take my silence for consent, I told him that, 'If he would not go to
+another bed, or allow me, I should sit up in my study all night.' He
+attempted to pull me into the chamber, half joking. But I resisted; and,
+as he had determined not to give me any reason for saying that he used
+violence, after a few more efforts, he retired, cursing my obstinacy, to
+bed.
+
+"I sat musing some time longer; then, throwing my cloak around me,
+prepared for sleep on a sopha. And, so fortunate seemed my deliverance,
+so sacred the pleasure of being thus wrapped up in myself, that I slept
+profoundly, and woke with a mind composed to encounter the struggles of
+the day. Mr. Venables did not wake till some hours after; and then he
+came to me half-dressed, yawning and stretching, with haggard eyes, as if
+he scarcely recollected what had passed the preceding evening. He fixed
+his eyes on me for a moment, then, calling me a fool, asked 'How long I
+intended to continue this pretty farce? For his part, he was devilish
+sick of it; but this was the plague of marrying women who pretended to
+know something.'
+
+"I made no other reply to this harangue, than to say, 'That he ought to
+be glad to get rid of a woman so unfit to be his companion--and that any
+change in my conduct would be mean dissimulation; for maturer reflection
+only gave the sacred seal of reason to my first resolution.'
+
+"He looked as if he could have stamped with impatience, at being obliged
+to stifle his rage; but, conquering his anger (for weak people, whose
+passions seem the most ungovernable, restrain them with the greatest
+ease, when they have a sufficient motive), he exclaimed, 'Very pretty,
+upon my soul! very pretty, theatrical flourishes! Pray, fair Roxana,
+stoop from your altitudes, and remember that you are acting a part in
+real life.'
+
+"He uttered this speech with a self-satisfied air, and went down stairs
+to dress.
+
+"In about an hour he came to me again; and in the same tone said, 'That
+he came as my gentleman-usher to hand me down to breakfast.
+
+"'Of the black rod?' asked I.
+
+"This question, and the tone in which I asked it, a little disconcerted
+him. To say the truth, I now felt no resentment; my firm resolution to
+free myself from my ignoble thraldom, had absorbed the various emotions
+which, during six years, had racked my soul. The duty pointed out by my
+principles seemed clear; and not one tender feeling intruded to make me
+swerve: The dislike which my husband had inspired was strong; but it only
+led me to wish to avoid, to wish to let him drop out of my memory; there
+was no misery, no torture that I would not deliberately have chosen,
+rather than renew my lease of servitude.
+
+"During the breakfast, he attempted to reason with me on the folly of
+romantic sentiments; for this was the indiscriminate epithet he gave to
+every mode of conduct or thinking superior to his own. He asserted, 'that
+all the world were governed by their own interest; those who pretended to
+be actuated by different motives, were only deeper knaves, or fools
+crazed by books, who took for gospel all the rodomantade nonsense written
+by men who knew nothing of the world. For his part, he thanked God, he
+was no hypocrite; and, if he stretched a point sometimes, it was always
+with an intention of paying every man his own.'
+
+"He then artfully insinuated, 'that he daily expected a vessel to
+arrive, a successful speculation, that would make him easy for the
+present, and that he had several other schemes actually depending, that
+could not fail. He had no doubt of becoming rich in a few years, though
+he had been thrown back by some unlucky adventures at the setting out.'
+
+"I mildly replied, 'That I wished he might not involve himself still
+deeper.'
+
+"He had no notion that I was governed by a decision of judgment, not to
+be compared with a mere spurt of resentment. He knew not what it was to
+feel indignation against vice, and often boasted of his placable temper,
+and readiness to forgive injuries. True; for he only considered the being
+deceived, as an effort of skill he had not guarded against; and then,
+with a cant of candour, would observe, 'that he did not know how he
+might himself have been tempted to act in the same circumstances.' And,
+as his heart never opened to friendship, it never was wounded by
+disappointment. Every new acquaintance he protested, it is true, was 'the
+cleverest fellow in the world;' and he really thought so; till the
+novelty of his conversation or manners ceased to have any effect on his
+sluggish spirits. His respect for rank or fortune was more permanent,
+though he chanced to have no design of availing himself of the influence
+of either to promote his own views.
+
+"After a prefatory conversation,--my blood (I thought it had been cooler)
+flushed over my whole countenance as he spoke--he alluded to my
+situation. He desired me to reflect--'and act like a prudent woman, as
+the best proof of my superior understanding; for he must own I had sense,
+did I know how to use it. I was not,' he laid a stress on his words,
+'without my passions; and a husband was a convenient cloke.--He was
+liberal in his way of thinking; and why might not we, like many other
+married people, who were above vulgar prejudices, tacitly consent to let
+each other follow their own inclination?--He meant nothing more, in the
+letter I made the ground of complaint; and the pleasure which I seemed to
+take in Mr. S.'s company, led him to conclude, that he was not
+disagreeable to me.'
+
+"A clerk brought in the letters of the day, and I, as I often did, while
+he was discussing subjects of business, went to the _piano forte_, and
+began to play a favourite air to restore myself, as it were, to nature,
+and drive the sophisticated sentiments I had just been obliged to listen
+to, out of my soul.
+
+"They had excited sensations similar to those I have felt, in viewing the
+squalid inhabitants of some of the lanes and back streets of the
+metropolis, mortified at being compelled to consider them as my
+fellow-creatures, as if an ape had claimed kindred with me. Or, as when
+surrounded by a mephitical fog, I have wished to have a volley of cannon
+fired, to clear the incumbered atmosphere, and give me room to breathe
+and move.
+
+"My spirits were all in arms, and I played a kind of extemporary prelude.
+The cadence was probably wild and impassioned, while, lost in thought, I
+made the sounds a kind of echo to my train of thinking.
+
+"Pausing for a moment, I met Mr. Venables' eyes. He was observing me with
+an air of conceited satisfaction, as much as to say--'My last insinuation
+has done the business--she begins to know her own interest.' Then
+gathering up his letters, he said, 'That he hoped he should hear no more
+romantic stuff, well enough in a miss just come from boarding school;'
+and went, as was his custom, to the counting-house. I still continued
+playing; and, turning to a sprightly lesson, I executed it with uncommon
+vivacity. I heard footsteps approach the door, and was soon convinced
+that Mr. Venables was listening; the consciousness only gave more
+animation to my fingers. He went down into the kitchen, and the cook,
+probably by his desire, came to me, to know what I would please to order
+for dinner. Mr. Venables came into the parlour again, with apparent
+carelessness. I perceived that the cunning man was over-reaching himself;
+and I gave my directions as usual, and left the room.
+
+"While I was making some alteration in my dress, Mr. Venables peeped in,
+and, begging my pardon for interrupting me, disappeared. I took up some
+work (I could not read), and two or three messages were sent to me,
+probably for no other purpose, but to enable Mr. Venables to ascertain
+what I was about.
+
+"I listened whenever I heard the street-door open; at last I imagined I
+could distinguish Mr. Venables' step, going out. I laid aside my work;
+my heart palpitated; still I was afraid hastily to enquire; and I waited
+a long half hour, before I ventured to ask the boy whether his master was
+in the counting-house?
+
+"Being answered in the negative, I bade him call me a coach, and
+collecting a few necessaries hastily together, with a little parcel of
+letters and papers which I had collected the preceding evening, I hurried
+into it, desiring the coachman to drive to a distant part of the town.
+
+"I almost feared that the coach would break down before I got out of the
+street; and, when I turned the corner, I seemed to breathe a freer air. I
+was ready to imagine that I was rising above the thick atmosphere of
+earth; or I felt, as wearied souls might be supposed to feel on entering
+another state of existence.
+
+"I stopped at one or two stands of coaches to elude pursuit, and then
+drove round the skirts of the town to seek for an obscure lodging, where
+I wished to remain concealed, till I could avail myself of my uncle's
+protection. I had resolved to assume my own name immediately, and openly
+to avow my determination, without any formal vindication, the moment I
+had found a home, in which I could rest free from the daily alarm of
+expecting to see Mr. Venables enter.
+
+"I looked at several lodgings; but finding that I could not, without a
+reference to some acquaintance, who might inform my tyrant, get
+admittance into a decent apartment--men have not all this trouble--I
+thought of a woman whom I had assisted to furnish a little haberdasher's
+shop, and who I knew had a first floor to let.
+
+"I went to her, and though I could not persuade her, that the quarrel
+between me and Mr. Venables would never be made up, still she agreed to
+conceal me for the present; yet assuring me at the same time, shaking her
+head, that, when a woman was once married, she must bear every thing. Her
+pale face, on which appeared a thousand haggard lines and delving
+wrinkles, produced by what is emphatically termed fretting, inforced her
+remark; and I had afterwards an opportunity of observing the treatment
+she had to endure, which grizzled her into patience. She toiled from
+morning till night; yet her husband would rob the till, and take away the
+money reserved for paying bills; and, returning home drunk, he would
+beat her if she chanced to offend him, though she had a child at the
+breast.
+
+"These scenes awoke me at night; and, in the morning, I heard her, as
+usual, talk to her dear Johnny--he, forsooth, was her master; no slave in
+the West Indies had one more despotic; but fortunately she was of the
+true Russian breed of wives.
+
+"My mind, during the few past days, seemed, as it were, disengaged from
+my body; but, now the struggle was over, I felt very forcibly the effect
+which perturbation of spirits produces on a woman in my situation.
+
+"The apprehension of a miscarriage, obliged me to confine myself to my
+apartment near a fortnight; but I wrote to my uncle's friend for money,
+promising 'to call on him, and explain my situation, when I was well
+enough to go out; mean time I earnestly intreated him, not to mention my
+place of abode to any one, lest my husband--such the law considered
+him--should disturb the mind he could not conquer. I mentioned my
+intention of setting out for Lisbon, to claim my uncle's protection, the
+moment my health would permit.'
+
+"The tranquillity however, which I was recovering, was soon interrupted.
+My landlady came up to me one day, with eyes swollen with weeping, unable
+to utter what she was commanded to say. She declared, 'That she was never
+so miserable in her life; that she must appear an ungrateful monster; and
+that she would readily go down on her knees to me, to intreat me to
+forgive her, as she had done to her husband to spare her the cruel task.'
+Sobs prevented her from proceeding, or answering my impatient enquiries,
+to know what she meant.
+
+"When she became a little more composed, she took a newspaper out of her
+pocket, declaring, 'that her heart smote her, but what could she do?--she
+must obey her husband.' I snatched the paper from her. An advertisement
+quickly met my eye, purporting, that 'Maria Venables had, without any
+assignable cause, absconded from her husband; and any person harbouring
+her, was menaced with the utmost severity of the law.'
+
+"Perfectly acquainted with Mr. Venables' meanness of soul, this step did
+not excite my surprise, and scarcely my contempt. Resentment in my
+breast, never survived love. I bade the poor woman, in a kind tone, wipe
+her eyes, and request her husband to come up, and speak to me himself.
+
+"My manner awed him. He respected a lady, though not a woman; and began
+to mutter out an apology.
+
+"'Mr. Venables was a rich gentleman; he wished to oblige me, but he had
+suffered enough by the law already, to tremble at the thought; besides,
+for certain, we should come together again, and then even I should not
+thank him for being accessary to keeping us asunder.--A husband and wife
+were, God knows, just as one,--and all would come round at last.' He
+uttered a drawling 'Hem!' and then with an arch look, added--'Master
+might have had his little frolics--but--Lord bless your heart!--men
+would be men while the world stands.'
+
+"To argue with this privileged first-born of reason, I perceived, would
+be vain. I therefore only requested him to let me remain another day at
+his house, while I sought for a lodging; and not to inform Mr. Venables
+that I had ever been sheltered there.
+
+"He consented, because he had not the courage to refuse a person for whom
+he had an habitual respect; but I heard the pent-up choler burst forth in
+curses, when he met his wife, who was waiting impatiently at the foot of
+the stairs, to know what effect my expostulations would have on him.
+
+"Without wasting any time in the fruitless indulgence of vexation, I once
+more set out in search of an abode in which I could hide myself for a
+few weeks.
+
+"Agreeing to pay an exorbitant price, I hired an apartment, without any
+reference being required relative to my character: indeed, a glance at my
+shape seemed to say, that my motive for concealment was sufficiently
+obvious. Thus was I obliged to shroud my head in infamy.
+
+"To avoid all danger of detection--I use the appropriate word, my child,
+for I was hunted out like a felon--I determined to take possession of my
+new lodgings that very evening.
+
+"I did not inform my landlady where I was going. I knew that she had a
+sincere affection for me, and would willingly have run any risk to show
+her gratitude; yet I was fully convinced, that a few kind words from
+Johnny would have found the woman in her, and her dear benefactress, as
+she termed me in an agony of tears, would have been sacrificed, to
+recompense her tyrant for condescending to treat her like an equal. He
+could be kind-hearted, as she expressed it, when he pleased. And this
+thawed sternness, contrasted with his habitual brutality, was the more
+acceptable, and could not be purchased at too dear a rate.
+
+"The sight of the advertisement made me desirous of taking refuge with my
+uncle, let what would be the consequence; and I repaired in a hackney
+coach (afraid of meeting some person who might chance to know me, had I
+walked) to the chambers of my uncle's friend.
+
+"He received me with great politeness (my uncle had already prepossessed
+him in my favour), and listened, with interest, to my explanation of the
+motives which had induced me to fly from home, and skulk in obscurity,
+with all the timidity of fear that ought only to be the companion of
+guilt. He lamented, with rather more gallantry than, in my situation, I
+thought delicate, that such a woman should be thrown away on a man
+insensible to the charms of beauty or grace. He seemed at a loss what to
+advise me to do, to evade my husband's search, without hastening to my
+uncle, whom, he hesitating said, I might not find alive. He uttered this
+intelligence with visible regret; requested me, at least, to wait for the
+arrival of the next packet; offered me what money I wanted, and promised
+to visit me.
+
+"He kept his word; still no letter arrived to put an end to my painful
+state of suspense. I procured some books and music, to beguile the
+tedious solitary days.
+
+    'Come, ever smiling Liberty,
+    'And with thee bring thy jocund train:'
+
+I sung--and sung till, saddened by the strain of joy, I bitterly lamented
+the fate that deprived me of all social pleasure. Comparative liberty
+indeed I had possessed myself of; but the jocund train lagged far
+behind!
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XIII.
+
+
+"BY watching my only visitor, my uncle's friend, or by some other means,
+Mr. Venables discovered my residence, and came to enquire for me. The
+maid-servant assured him there was no such person in the house. A bustle
+ensued--I caught the alarm--listened--distinguished his voice, and
+immediately locked the door. They suddenly grew still; and I waited near
+a quarter of an hour, before I heard him open the parlour door, and mount
+the stairs with the mistress of the house, who obsequiously declared that
+she knew nothing of me.
+
+"Finding my door locked, she requested me to 'open it, and prepare to go
+home with my husband, poor gentleman! to whom I had already occasioned
+sufficient vexation.' I made no reply. Mr. Venables then, in an assumed
+tone of softness, intreated me, 'to consider what he suffered, and my own
+reputation, and get the better of childish resentment.' He ran on in the
+same strain, pretending to address me, but evidently adapting his
+discourse to the capacity of the landlady; who, at every pause, uttered
+an exclamation of pity; or 'Yes, to be sure--Very true, sir.'
+
+"Sick of the farce, and perceiving that I could not avoid the hated
+interview, I opened the door, and he entered. Advancing with easy
+assurance to take my hand, I shrunk from his touch, with an involuntary
+start, as I should have done from a noisome reptile, with more disgust
+than terror. His conductress was retiring, to give us, as she said, an
+opportunity to accommodate matters. But I bade her come in, or I would go
+out; and curiosity impelled her to obey me.
+
+"Mr. Venables began to expostulate; and this woman, proud of his
+confidence, to second him. But I calmly silenced her, in the midst of a
+vulgar harangue, and turning to him, asked, 'Why he vainly tormented me?
+declaring that no power on earth should force me back to his house.'
+
+"After a long altercation, the particulars of which, it would be to no
+purpose to repeat, he left the room. Some time was spent in loud
+conversation in the parlour below, and I discovered that he had brought
+his friend, an attorney, with him.
+
+                    *   *   *   *   *   *   *
+*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *
+*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *
+*   *
+
+The tumult on the landing place, brought out a gentleman, who had
+recently taken apartments in the house; he enquired why I was thus
+assailed[91-A]? The voluble attorney instantly repeated the trite tale.
+The stranger turned to me, observing, with the most soothing politeness
+and manly interest, that 'my countenance told a very different story.' He
+added, 'that I should not be insulted, or forced out of the house, by any
+body.'
+
+"'Not by her husband?' asked the attorney.
+
+"'No, sir, not by her husband.' Mr. Venables advanced towards him--But
+there was a decision in his attitude, that so well seconded that of his
+voice,
+
+*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *
+*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *
+*  *  *  *
+
+They left the house: at the same time protesting, that any one that
+should dare to protect me, should be prosecuted with the utmost rigour.
+
+"They were scarcely out of the house, when my landlady came up to me
+again, and begged my pardon, in a very different tone. For, though Mr.
+Venables had bid her, at her peril, harbour me, he had not attended, I
+found, to her broad hints, to discharge the lodging. I instantly promised
+to pay her, and make her a present to compensate for my abrupt departure,
+if she would procure me another lodging, at a sufficient distance; and
+she, in return, repeating Mr. Venables' plausible tale, I raised her
+indignation, and excited her sympathy, by telling her briefly the truth.
+
+"She expressed her commiseration with such honest warmth, that I felt
+soothed; for I have none of that fastidious sensitiveness, which a vulgar
+accent or gesture can alarm to the disregard of real kindness. I was ever
+glad to perceive in others the humane feelings I delighted to exercise;
+and the recollection of some ridiculous characteristic circumstances,
+which have occurred in a moment of emotion, has convulsed me with
+laughter, though at the instant I should have thought it sacrilegious to
+have smiled. Your improvement, my dearest girl, being ever present to me
+while I write, I note these feelings, because women, more accustomed to
+observe manners than actions, are too much alive to ridicule. So much so,
+that their boasted sensibility is often stifled by false delicacy. True
+sensibility, the sensibility which is the auxiliary of virtue, and the
+soul of genius, is in society so occupied with the feelings of others, as
+scarcely to regard its own sensations. With what reverence have I looked
+up at my uncle, the dear parent of my mind! when I have seen the sense of
+his own sufferings, of mind and body, absorbed in a desire to comfort
+those, whose misfortunes were comparatively trivial. He would have been
+ashamed of being as indulgent to himself, as he was to others. 'Genuine
+fortitude,' he would assert, 'consisted in governing our own emotions,
+and making allowance for the weaknesses in our friends, that we would not
+tolerate in ourselves.' But where is my fond regret leading me!
+
+"'Women must be submissive,' said my landlady. 'Indeed what could most
+women do? Who had they to maintain them, but their husbands? Every woman,
+and especially a lady, could not go through rough and smooth, as she had
+done, to earn a little bread.'
+
+"She was in a talking mood, and proceeded to inform me how she had been
+used in the world. 'She knew what it was to have a bad husband, or she
+did not know who should.' I perceived that she would be very much
+mortified, were I not to attend to her tale, and I did not attempt to
+interrupt her, though I wished her, as soon as possible, to go out in
+search of a new abode for me, where I could once more hide my head.
+
+"She began by telling me, 'That she had saved a little money in service;
+and was over-persuaded (we must all be in love once in our lives) to
+marry a likely man, a footman in the family, not worth a groat. My plan,'
+she continued, 'was to take a house, and let out lodgings; and all went
+on well, till my husband got acquainted with an impudent slut, who chose
+to live on other people's means--and then all went to rack and ruin. He
+ran in debt to buy her fine clothes, such clothes as I never thought of
+wearing myself, and--would you believe it?--he signed an execution on my
+very goods, bought with the money I worked so hard to get; and they came
+and took my bed from under me, before I heard a word of the matter. Aye,
+madam, these are misfortunes that you gentlefolks know nothing of,--but
+sorrow is sorrow, let it come which way it will.
+
+"'I sought for a service again--very hard, after having a house of my
+own!--but he used to follow me, and kick up such a riot when he was
+drunk, that I could not keep a place; nay, he even stole my clothes, and
+pawned them; and when I went to the pawnbroker's, and offered to take my
+oath that they were not bought with a farthing of his money, they said,
+'It was all as one, my husband had a right to whatever I had.'
+
+"'At last he listed for a soldier, and I took a house, making an
+agreement to pay for the furniture by degrees; and I almost starved
+myself, till I once more got before-hand in the world.
+
+"'After an absence of six years (God forgive me! I thought he was dead)
+my husband returned; found me out, and came with such a penitent face, I
+forgave him, and clothed him from head to foot. But he had not been a
+week in the house, before some of his creditors arrested him; and, he
+selling my goods, I found myself once more reduced to beggary; for I was
+not as well able to work, go to bed late, and rise early, as when I
+quitted service; and then I thought it hard enough. He was soon tired of
+me, when there was nothing more to be had, and left me again.
+
+"'I will not tell you how I was buffeted about, till, hearing for certain
+that he had died in an hospital abroad, I once more returned to my old
+occupation; but have not yet been able to get my head above water: so,
+madam, you must not be angry if I am afraid to run any risk, when I know
+so well, that women have always the worst of it, when law is to decide.'
+
+"After uttering a few more complaints, I prevailed on my landlady to go
+out in quest of a lodging; and, to be more secure, I condescended to the
+mean shift of changing my name.
+
+"But why should I dwell on similar incidents!--I was hunted, like an
+infected beast, from three different apartments, and should not have been
+allowed to rest in any, had not Mr. Venables, informed of my uncle's
+dangerous state of health, been inspired with the fear of hurrying me out
+of the world as I advanced in my pregnancy, by thus tormenting and
+obliging me to take sudden journeys to avoid him; and then his
+speculations on my uncle's fortune must prove abortive.
+
+"One day, when he had pursued me to an inn, I fainted, hurrying from him;
+and, falling down, the sight of my blood alarmed him, and obtained a
+respite for me. It is strange that he should have retained any hope,
+after observing my unwavering determination; but, from the mildness of my
+behaviour, when I found all my endeavours to change his disposition
+unavailing, he formed an erroneous opinion of my character, imagining
+that, were we once more together, I should part with the money he could
+not legally force from me, with the same facility as formerly. My
+forbearance and occasional sympathy he had mistaken for weakness of
+character; and, because he perceived that I disliked resistance, he
+thought my indulgence and compassion mere selfishness, and never
+discovered that the fear of being unjust, or of unnecessarily wounding
+the feelings of another, was much more painful to me, than any thing I
+could have to endure myself. Perhaps it was pride which made me imagine,
+that I could bear what I dreaded to inflict; and that it was often easier
+to suffer, than to see the sufferings of others.
+
+"I forgot to mention that, during this persecution, I received a letter
+from my uncle, informing me, 'that he only found relief from continual
+change of air; and that he intended to return when the spring was a
+little more advanced (it was now the middle of February), and then we
+would plan a journey to Italy, leaving the fogs and cares of England far
+behind.' He approved of my conduct, promised to adopt my child, and
+seemed to have no doubt of obliging Mr. Venables to hear reason. He wrote
+to his friend, by the same post, desiring him to call on Mr. Venables in
+his name; and, in consequence of the remonstrances he dictated, I was
+permitted to lie-in tranquilly.
+
+"The two or three weeks previous, I had been allowed to rest in peace;
+but, so accustomed was I to pursuit and alarm, that I seldom closed my
+eyes without being haunted by Mr. Venables' image, who seemed to assume
+terrific or hateful forms to torment me, wherever I turned.--Sometimes a
+wild cat, a roaring bull, or hideous assassin, whom I vainly attempted to
+fly; at others he was a demon, hurrying me to the brink of a precipice,
+plunging me into dark waves, or horrid gulfs; and I woke, in violent fits
+of trembling anxiety, to assure myself that it was all a dream, and to
+endeavour to lure my waking thoughts to wander to the delightful Italian
+vales, I hoped soon to visit; or to picture some august ruins, where I
+reclined in fancy on a mouldering column, and escaped, in the
+contemplation of the heart-enlarging virtues of antiquity, from the
+turmoil of cares that had depressed all the daring purposes of my soul.
+But I was not long allowed to calm my mind by the exercise of my
+imagination; for the third day after your birth, my child, I was
+surprised by a visit from my elder brother; who came in the most abrupt
+manner, to inform me of the death of my uncle. He had left the greater
+part of his fortune to my child, appointing me its guardian; in short,
+every step was taken to enable me to be mistress of his fortune, without
+putting any part of it in Mr. Venables' power. My brother came to vent
+his rage on me, for having, as he expressed himself, 'deprived him, my
+uncle's eldest nephew, of his inheritance;' though my uncle's property,
+the fruit of his own exertion, being all in the funds, or on landed
+securities, there was not a shadow of justice in the charge.
+
+"As I sincerely loved my uncle, this intelligence brought on a fever,
+which I struggled to conquer with all the energy of my mind; for, in my
+desolate state, I had it very much at heart to suckle you, my poor babe.
+You seemed my only tie to life, a cherub, to whom I wished to be a
+father, as well as a mother; and the double duty appeared to me to
+produce a proportionate increase of affection. But the pleasure I felt,
+while sustaining you, snatched from the wreck of hope, was cruelly damped
+by melancholy reflections on my widowed state--widowed by the death of my
+uncle. Of Mr. Venables I thought not, even when I thought of the felicity
+of loving your father, and how a mother's pleasure might be exalted, and
+her care softened by a husband's tenderness.--'Ought to be!' I exclaimed;
+and I endeavoured to drive away the tenderness that suffocated me; but
+my spirits were weak, and the unbidden tears would flow. 'Why was I,' I
+would ask thee, but thou didst not heed me,--'cut off from the
+participation of the sweetest pleasure of life?' I imagined with what
+extacy, after the pains of child-bed, I should have presented my little
+stranger, whom I had so long wished to view, to a respectable father, and
+with what maternal fondness I should have pressed them both to my
+heart!--Now I kissed her with less delight, though with the most
+endearing compassion, poor helpless one! when I perceived a slight
+resemblance of him, to whom she owed her existence; or, if any gesture
+reminded me of him, even in his best days, my heart heaved, and I pressed
+the innocent to my bosom, as if to purify it--yes, I blushed to think
+that its purity had been sullied, by allowing such a man to be its
+father.
+
+"After my recovery, I began to think of taking a house in the country, or
+of making an excursion on the continent, to avoid Mr. Venables; and to
+open my heart to new pleasures and affection. The spring was melting into
+summer, and you, my little companion, began to smile--that smile made
+hope bud out afresh, assuring me the world was not a desert. Your
+gestures were ever present to my fancy; and I dwelt on the joy I should
+feel when you would begin to walk and lisp. Watching your wakening mind,
+and shielding from every rude blast my tender blossom, I recovered my
+spirits--I dreamed not of the frost--'the killing frost,' to which you
+were destined to be exposed.--But I lose all patience--and execrate the
+injustice of the world--folly! ignorance!--I should rather call it; but,
+shut up from a free circulation of thought, and always pondering on the
+same griefs, I writhe under the torturing apprehensions, which ought to
+excite only honest indignation, or active compassion; and would, could I
+view them as the natural consequence of things. But, born a woman--and
+born to suffer, in endeavouring to repress my own emotions, I feel more
+acutely the various ills my sex are fated to bear--I feel that the evils
+they are subject to endure, degrade them so far below their oppressors,
+as almost to justify their tyranny; leading at the same time superficial
+reasoners to term that weakness the cause, which is only the consequence
+of short-sighted despotism.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[91-A] The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer of Maria, in an
+early stage of the history, is already stated (Chap. III.) to have been
+an after-thought of the author. This has probably caused the
+imperfectness of the manuscript in the above passage; though, at the same
+time, it must be acknowledged to be somewhat uncertain, whether Darnford
+is the stranger intended in this place. It appears from Chap. XVII. that
+an interference of a more decisive nature was designed to be attributed
+to him.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XIV.
+
+
+"AS my mind grew calmer, the visions of Italy again returned with their
+former glow of colouring; and I resolved on quitting the kingdom for a
+time, in search of the cheerfulness, that naturally results from a change
+of scene, unless we carry the barbed arrow with us, and only see what we
+feel.
+
+"During the period necessary to prepare for a long absence, I sent a
+supply to pay my father's debts, and settled my brothers in eligible
+situations; but my attention was not wholly engrossed by my family,
+though I do not think it necessary to enumerate the common exertions of
+humanity. The manner in which my uncle's property was settled, prevented
+me from making the addition to the fortune of my surviving sister, that I
+could have wished; but I had prevailed on him to bequeath her two
+thousand pounds, and she determined to marry a lover, to whom she had
+been some time attached. Had it not been for this engagement, I should
+have invited her to accompany me in my tour; and I might have escaped the
+pit, so artfully dug in my path, when I was the least aware of danger.
+
+"I had thought of remaining in England, till I weaned my child; but this
+state of freedom was too peaceful to last, and I had soon reason to wish
+to hasten my departure. A friend of Mr. Venables, the same attorney who
+had accompanied him in several excursions to hunt me from my hiding
+places, waited on me to propose a reconciliation. On my refusal, he
+indirectly advised me to make over to my husband--for husband he would
+term him--the greater part of the property I had at command, menacing me
+with continual persecution unless I complied, and that, as a last resort,
+he would claim the child. I did not, though intimidated by the last
+insinuation, scruple to declare, that I would not allow him to squander
+the money left to me for far different purposes, but offered him five
+hundred pounds, if he would sign a bond not to torment me any more. My
+maternal anxiety made me thus appear to waver from my first
+determination, and probably suggested to him, or his diabolical agent,
+the infernal plot, which has succeeded but too well.
+
+"The bond was executed; still I was impatient to leave England. Mischief
+hung in the air when we breathed the same; I wanted seas to divide us,
+and waters to roll between, till he had forgotten that I had the means of
+helping him through a new scheme. Disturbed by the late occurrences, I
+instantly prepared for my departure. My only delay was waiting for a
+maid-servant, who spoke French fluently, and had been warmly recommended
+to me. A valet I was advised to hire, when I fixed on my place of
+residence for any time.
+
+"My God, with what a light heart did I set out for Dover!--It was not my
+country, but my cares, that I was leaving behind. My heart seemed to
+bound with the wheels, or rather appeared the centre on which they
+twirled. I clasped you to my bosom, exclaiming 'And you will be
+safe--quite safe--when--we are once on board the packet.--Would we were
+there!' I smiled at my idle fears, as the natural effect of continual
+alarm; and I scarcely owned to myself that I dreaded Mr. Venables's
+cunning, or was conscious of the horrid delight he would feel, at forming
+stratagem after stratagem to circumvent me. I was already in the snare--I
+never reached the packet--I never saw thee more.--I grow breathless. I
+have scarcely patience to write down the details. The maid--the plausible
+woman I had hired--put, doubtless, some stupifying potion in what I ate
+or drank, the morning I left town. All I know is, that she must have
+quitted the chaise, shameless wretch! and taken (from my breast) my babe
+with her. How could a creature in a female form see me caress thee, and
+steal thee from my arms! I must stop, stop to repress a mother's anguish;
+left, in bitterness of soul, I imprecate the wrath of heaven on this
+tiger, who tore my only comfort from me.
+
+"How long I slept I know not; certainly many hours, for I woke at the
+close of day, in a strange confusion of thought. I was probably roused to
+recollection by some one thundering at a huge, unwieldy gate. Attempting
+to ask where I was, my voice died away, and I tried to raise it in vain,
+as I have done in a dream. I looked for my babe with affright; feared
+that it had fallen out of my lap, while I had so strangely forgotten
+her; and, such was the vague intoxication, I can give it no other name,
+in which I was plunged, I could not recollect when or where I last saw
+you; but I sighed, as if my heart wanted room to clear my head.
+
+"The gates opened heavily, and the sullen sound of many locks and bolts
+drawn back, grated on my very soul, before I was appalled by the creeking
+of the dismal hinges, as they closed after me. The gloomy pile was before
+me, half in ruins; some of the aged trees of the avenue were cut down,
+and left to rot where they fell; and as we approached some mouldering
+steps, a monstrous dog darted forwards to the length of his chain, and
+barked and growled infernally.
+
+"The door was opened slowly, and a murderous visage peeped out, with a
+lantern. 'Hush!' he uttered, in a threatning tone, and the affrighted
+animal stole back to his kennel. The door of the chaise flew back, the
+stranger put down the lantern, and clasped his dreadful arms around me.
+It was certainly the effect of the soporific draught, for, instead of
+exerting my strength, I sunk without motion, though not without sense, on
+his shoulder, my limbs refusing to obey my will. I was carried up the
+steps into a close-shut hall. A candle flaring in the socket, scarcely
+dispersed the darkness, though it displayed to me the ferocious
+countenance of the wretch who held me.
+
+"He mounted a wide staircase. Large figures painted on the walls seemed
+to start on me, and glaring eyes to meet me at every turn. Entering a
+long gallery, a dismal shriek made me spring out of my conductor's arms,
+with I know not what mysterious emotion of terror; but I fell on the
+floor, unable to sustain myself.
+
+"A strange-looking female started out of one of the recesses, and
+observed me with more curiosity than interest; till, sternly bid retire,
+she flitted back like a shadow. Other faces, strongly marked, or
+distorted, peeped through the half-opened doors, and I heard some
+incoherent sounds. I had no distinct idea where I could be--I looked on
+all sides, and almost doubted whether I was alive or dead.
+
+"Thrown on a bed, I immediately sunk into insensibility again; and next
+day, gradually recovering the use of reason, I began, starting
+affrighted from the conviction, to discover where I was confined--I
+insisted on seeing the master of the mansion--I saw him--and perceived
+that I was buried alive.--
+
+"Such, my child, are the events of thy mother's life to this dreadful
+moment--Should she ever escape from the fangs of her enemies, she will
+add the secrets of her prison-house--and--"
+
+Some lines were here crossed out, and the memoirs broke off abruptly with
+the names of Jemima and Darnford.
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX.
+
+[ADVERTISEMENT.
+
+
+THE performance, with a fragment of which the reader has now been
+presented, was designed to consist of three parts. The preceding sheets
+were considered as constituting one of those parts. Those persons who in
+the perusal of the chapters, already written and in some degree finished
+by the author, have felt their hearts awakened, and their curiosity
+excited as to the sequel of the story, will, of course, gladly accept
+even of the broken paragraphs and half-finished sentences, which have
+been found committed to paper, as materials for the remainder. The
+fastidious and cold-hearted critic may perhaps feel himself repelled by
+the incoherent form in which they are presented. But an inquisitive
+temper willingly accepts the most imperfect and mutilated information,
+where better is not to be had: and readers, who in any degree resemble
+the author in her quick apprehension of sentiment, and of the pleasures
+and pains of imagination, will, I believe, find gratification, in
+contemplating sketches, which were designed in a short time to have
+received the finishing touches of her genius; but which must now for ever
+remain a mark to record the triumphs of mortality, over schemes of
+usefulness, and projects of public interest.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XV.
+
+
+DARNFORD returned the memoirs to Maria, with a most affectionate letter,
+in which he reasoned on "the absurdity of the laws respecting matrimony,
+which, till divorces could be more easily obtained, was," he declared,
+"the most insufferable bondage. Ties of this nature could not bind minds
+governed by superior principles; and such beings were privileged to act
+above the dictates of laws they had no voice in framing, if they had
+sufficient strength of mind to endure the natural consequence. In her
+case, to talk of duty, was a farce, excepting what was due to herself.
+Delicacy, as well as reason, forbade her ever to think of returning to
+her husband: was she then to restrain her charming sensibility through
+mere prejudice? These arguments were not absolutely impartial, for he
+disdained to conceal, that, when he appealed to her reason, he felt that
+he had some interest in her heart.--The conviction was not more
+transporting, than sacred--a thousand times a day, he asked himself how
+he had merited such happiness?--and as often he determined to purify the
+heart she deigned to inhabit--He intreated to be again admitted to her
+presence."
+
+He was; and the tear which glistened in his eye, when he respectfully
+pressed her to his bosom, rendered him peculiarly dear to the unfortunate
+mother. Grief had stilled the transports of love, only to render their
+mutual tenderness more touching. In former interviews, Darnford had
+contrived, by a hundred little pretexts, to sit near her, to take her
+hand, or to meet her eyes--now it was all soothing affection, and esteem
+seemed to have rivalled love. He adverted to her narrative, and spoke
+with warmth of the oppression she had endured.--His eyes, glowing with a
+lambent flame, told her how much he wished to restore her to liberty and
+love; but he kissed her hand, as if it had been that of a saint; and
+spoke of the loss of her child, as if it had been his own.--What could
+have been more flattering to Maria?--Every instance of self-denial was
+registered in her heart, and she loved him, for loving her too well to
+give way to the transports of passion.
+
+They met again and again; and Darnford declared, while passion suffused
+his cheeks, that he never before knew what it was to love.--
+
+One morning Jemima informed Maria, that her master intended to wait on
+her, and speak to her without witnesses. He came, and brought a letter
+with him, pretending that he was ignorant of its contents, though he
+insisted on having it returned to him. It was from the attorney already
+mentioned, who informed her of the death of her child, and hinted, "that
+she could not now have a legitimate heir, and that, would she make over
+the half of her fortune during life, she should be conveyed to Dover, and
+permitted to pursue her plan of travelling."
+
+Maria answered with warmth, "That she had no terms to make with the
+murderer of her babe, nor would she purchase liberty at the price of her
+own respect."
+
+She began to expostulate with her jailor; but he sternly bade her "Be
+silent--he had not gone so far, not to go further."
+
+Darnford came in the evening. Jemima was obliged to be absent, and she,
+as usual, locked the door on them, to prevent interruption or
+discovery.--The lovers were, at first, embarrassed; but fell insensibly
+into confidential discourse. Darnford represented, "that they might soon
+be parted," and wished her "to put it out of the power of fate to
+separate them."
+
+As her husband she now received him, and he solemnly pledged himself as
+her protector--and eternal friend.--
+
+There was one peculiarity in Maria's mind: she was more anxious not to
+deceive, than to guard against deception; and had rather trust without
+sufficient reason, than be for ever the prey of doubt. Besides, what are
+we, when the mind has, from reflection, a certain kind of elevation,
+which exalts the contemplation above the little concerns of prudence! We
+see what we wish, and make a world of our own--and, though reality may
+sometimes open a door to misery, yet the moments of happiness procured by
+the imagination, may, without a paradox, be reckoned among the solid
+comforts of life. Maria now, imagining that she had found a being of
+celestial mould--was happy,--nor was she deceived.--He was then plastic
+in her impassioned hand--and reflected all the sentiments which animated
+and warmed her.
+
+-- -- -- --
+-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
+-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XVI.
+
+
+ONE morning confusion seemed to reign in the house, and Jemima came in
+terror, to inform Maria, "that her master had left it, with a
+determination, she was assured (and too many circumstances corroborated
+the opinion, to leave a doubt of its truth) of never returning. I am
+prepared then," said Jemima, "to accompany you in your flight."
+
+Maria started up, her eyes darting towards the door, as if afraid that
+some one should fasten it on her for ever.
+
+Jemima continued, "I have perhaps no right now to expect the performance
+of your promise; but on you it depends to reconcile me with the human
+race."
+
+"But Darnford!"--exclaimed Maria, mournfully--sitting down again, and
+crossing her arms--"I have no child to go to, and liberty has lost its
+sweets."
+
+"I am much mistaken, if Darnford is not the cause of my master's
+flight--his keepers assure me, that they have promised to confine him two
+days longer, and then he will be free--you cannot see him; but they will
+give a letter to him the moment he is free.--In that inform him where he
+may find you in London; fix on some hotel. Give me your clothes; I will
+send them out of the house with mine, and we will slip out at the
+garden-gate. Write your letter while I make these arrangements, but lose
+no time!"
+
+In an agitation of spirit, not to be calmed, Maria began to write to
+Darnford. She called him by the sacred name of "husband," and bade him
+"hasten to her, to share her fortune, or she would return to him."--An
+hotel in the Adelphi was the place of rendezvous.
+
+The letter was sealed and given in charge; and with light footsteps, yet
+terrified at the sound of them, she descended, scarcely breathing, and
+with an indistinct fear that she should never get out at the garden gate.
+Jemima went first.
+
+A being, with a visage that would have suited one possessed by a devil,
+crossed the path, and seized Maria by the arm. Maria had no fear but of
+being detained--"Who are you? what are you?" for the form was scarcely
+human. "If you are made of flesh and blood," his ghastly eyes glared on
+her, "do not stop me!"
+
+"Woman," interrupted a sepulchral voice, "what have I to do with
+thee?"--Still he grasped her hand, muttering a curse.
+
+"No, no; you have nothing to do with me," she exclaimed, "this is a
+moment of life and death!"--
+
+With supernatural force she broke from him, and, throwing her arms round
+Jemima, cried, "Save me!" The being, from whose grasp she had loosed
+herself, took up a stone as they opened the door, and with a kind of
+hellish sport threw it after them. They were out of his reach.
+
+When Maria arrived in town, she drove to the hotel already fixed on. But
+she could not sit still--her child was ever before her; and all that had
+passed during her confinement, appeared to be a dream. She went to the
+house in the suburbs, where, as she now discovered, her babe had been
+sent. The moment she entered, her heart grew sick; but she wondered not
+that it had proved its grave. She made the necessary enquiries, and the
+church-yard was pointed out, in which it rested under a turf. A little
+frock which the nurse's child wore (Maria had made it herself) caught her
+eye. The nurse was glad to sell it for half-a-guinea, and Maria hastened
+away with the relic, and, re-entering the hackney-coach which waited for
+her, gazed on it, till she reached her hotel.
+
+She then waited on the attorney who had made her uncle's will, and
+explained to him her situation. He readily advanced her some of the
+money which still remained in his hands, and promised to take the whole
+of the case into consideration. Maria only wished to be permitted to
+remain in quiet--She found that several bills, apparently with her
+signature, had been presented to her agent, nor was she for a moment at a
+loss to guess by whom they had been forged; yet, equally averse to
+threaten or intreat, she requested her friend [the solicitor] to call on
+Mr. Venables. He was not to be found at home; but at length his agent,
+the attorney, offered a conditional promise to Maria, to leave her in
+peace, as long as she behaved with propriety, if she would give up the
+notes. Maria inconsiderately consented--Darnford was arrived, and she
+wished to be only alive to love; she wished to forget the anguish she
+felt whenever she thought of her child.
+
+They took a ready furnished lodging together, for she was above disguise;
+Jemima insisting on being considered as her house-keeper, and to receive
+the customary stipend. On no other terms would she remain with her
+friend.
+
+Darnford was indefatigable in tracing the mysterious circumstances of his
+confinement. The cause was simply, that a relation, a very distant one,
+to whom he was heir, had died intestate, leaving a considerable fortune.
+On the news of Darnford's arrival [in England, a person, intrusted with
+the management of the property, and who had the writings in his
+possession, determining, by one bold stroke, to strip Darnford of the
+succession,] had planned his confinement; and [as soon as he had taken
+the measures he judged most conducive to his object, this ruffian,
+together with his instrument,] the keeper of the private mad-house, left
+the kingdom. Darnford, who still pursued his enquiries, at last
+discovered that they had fixed their place of refuge at Paris.
+
+Maria and he determined therefore, with the faithful Jemima, to visit
+that metropolis, and accordingly were preparing for the journey, when
+they were informed that Mr. Venables had commenced an action against
+Darnford for seduction and adultery. The indignation Maria felt cannot be
+explained; she repented of the forbearance she had exercised in giving up
+the notes. Darnford could not put off his journey, without risking the
+loss of his property: Maria therefore furnished him with money for his
+expedition; and determined to remain in London till the termination of
+this affair.
+
+She visited some ladies with whom she had formerly been intimate, but was
+refused admittance; and at the opera, or Ranelagh, they could not
+recollect her. Among these ladies there were some, not her most intimate
+acquaintance, who were generally supposed to avail themselves of the
+cloke of marriage, to conceal a mode of conduct, that would for ever have
+damned their fame, had they been innocent, seduced girls. These
+particularly stood aloof.--Had she remained with her husband, practising
+insincerity, and neglecting her child to manage an intrigue, she would
+still have been visited and respected. If, instead of openly living with
+her lover, she could have condescended to call into play a thousand
+arts, which, degrading her own mind, might have allowed the people who
+were not deceived, to pretend to be so, she would have been caressed and
+treated like an honourable woman. "And Brutus[138-A] is an honourable
+man!" said Mark-Antony with equal sincerity.
+
+With Darnford she did not taste uninterrupted felicity; there was a
+volatility in his manner which often distressed her; but love gladdened
+the scene; besides, he was the most tender, sympathizing creature in the
+world. A fondness for the sex often gives an appearance of humanity to
+the behaviour of men, who have small pretensions to the reality; and they
+seem to love others, when they are only pursuing their own
+gratification. Darnford appeared ever willing to avail himself of her
+taste and acquirements, while she endeavoured to profit by his decision
+of character, and to eradicate some of the romantic notions, which had
+taken root in her mind, while in adversity she had brooded over visions
+of unattainable bliss.
+
+The real affections of life, when they are allowed to burst forth, are
+buds pregnant with joy and all the sweet emotions of the soul; yet they
+branch out with wild ease, unlike the artificial forms of felicity,
+sketched by an imagination painful alive. The substantial happiness,
+which enlarges and civilizes the mind, may be compared to the pleasure
+experienced in roving through nature at large, inhaling the sweet gale
+natural to the clime; while the reveries of a feverish imagination
+continually sport themselves in gardens full of aromatic shrubs, which
+cloy while they delight, and weaken the sense of pleasure they gratify.
+The heaven of fancy, below or beyond the stars, in this life, or in those
+ever-smiling regions surrounded by the unmarked ocean of futurity, have
+an insipid uniformity which palls. Poets have imagined scenes of bliss;
+but, fencing out sorrow, all the extatic emotions of the soul, and even
+its grandeur, seem to be equally excluded. We dose over the unruffled
+lake, and long to scale the rocks which fence the happy valley of
+contentment, though serpents hiss in the pathless desert, and danger
+lurks in the unexplored wiles. Maria found herself more indulgent as she
+was happier, and discovered virtues, in characters she had before
+disregarded, while chasing the phantoms of elegance and excellence, which
+sported in the meteors that exhale in the marshes of misfortune. The
+heart is often shut by romance against social pleasure; and, fostering a
+sickly sensibility, grows callous to the soft touches of humanity.
+
+To part with Darnford was indeed cruel.--It was to feel most painfully
+alone; but she rejoiced to think, that she should spare him the care and
+perplexity of the suit, and meet him again, all his own. Marriage, as at
+present constituted, she considered as leading to immorality--yet, as the
+odium of society impedes usefulness, she wished to avow her affection to
+Darnford, by becoming his wife according to established rules; not to be
+confounded with women who act from very different motives, though her
+conduct would be just the same without the ceremony as with it, and her
+expectations from him not less firm. The being summoned to defend herself
+from a charge which she was determined to plead guilty to, was still
+galling, as it roused bitter reflections on the situation of women in
+society.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[138-A] The name in the manuscript is by mistake written Cæsar.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XVII.
+
+
+SUCH was her state of mind when the dogs of law were let loose on her.
+Maria took the task of conducting Darnford's defence upon herself. She
+instructed his counsel to plead guilty to the charge of adultery; but to
+deny that of seduction.
+
+The counsel for the plaintiff opened the cause, by observing, "that his
+client had ever been an indulgent husband, and had borne with several
+defects of temper, while he had nothing criminal to lay to the charge of
+his wife. But that she left his house without assigning any cause. He
+could not assert that she was then acquainted with the defendant; yet,
+when he was once endeavouring to bring her back to her home, this man
+put the peace-officers to flight, and took her he knew not whither. After
+the birth of her child, her conduct was so strange, and a melancholy
+malady having afflicted one of the family, which delicacy forbade the
+dwelling on, it was necessary to confine her. By some means the defendant
+enabled her to make her escape, and they had lived together, in despite
+of all sense of order and decorum. The adultery was allowed, it was not
+necessary to bring any witnesses to prove it; but the seduction, though
+highly probable from the circumstances which he had the honour to state,
+could not be so clearly proved.--It was of the most atrocious kind, as
+decency was set at defiance, and respect for reputation, which shows
+internal compunction, utterly disregarded."
+
+A strong sense of injustice had silenced every emotion, which a mixture
+of true and false delicacy might otherwise have excited in Maria's bosom.
+She only felt in earnest to insist on the privilege of her nature. The
+sarcasms of society, and the condemnation of a mistaken world, were
+nothing to her, compared with acting contrary to those feelings which
+were the foundation of her principles. [She therefore eagerly put herself
+forward, instead of desiring to be absent, on this memorable occasion.]
+
+Convinced that the subterfuges of the law were disgraceful, she wrote a
+paper, which she expressly desired might be read in court:
+
+"Married when scarcely able to distinguish the nature of the engagement,
+I yet submitted to the rigid laws which enslave women, and obeyed the man
+whom I could no longer love. Whether the duties of the state are
+reciprocal, I mean not to discuss; but I can prove repeated infidelities
+which I overlooked or pardoned. Witnesses are not wanting to establish
+these facts. I at present maintain the child of a maid servant, sworn to
+him, and born after our marriage. I am ready to allow, that education and
+circumstances lead men to think and act with less delicacy, than the
+preservation of order in society demands from women; but surely I may
+without assumption declare, that, though I could excuse the birth, I
+could not the desertion of this unfortunate babe:--and, while I despised
+the man, it was not easy to venerate the husband. With proper
+restrictions however, I revere the institution which fraternizes the
+world. I exclaim against the laws which throw the whole weight of the
+yoke on the weaker shoulders, and force women, when they claim
+protectorship as mothers, to sign a contract, which renders them
+dependent on the caprice of the tyrant, whom choice or necessity has
+appointed to reign over them. Various are the cases, in which a woman
+ought to separate herself from her husband; and mine, I may be allowed
+emphatically to insist, comes under the description of the most
+aggravated.
+
+"I will not enlarge on those provocations which only the individual can
+estimate; but will bring forward such charges only, the truth of which is
+an insult upon humanity. In order to promote certain destructive
+speculations, Mr. Venables prevailed on me to borrow certain sums of a
+wealthy relation; and, when I refused further compliance, he thought of
+bartering my person; and not only allowed opportunities to, but urged, a
+friend from whom he borrowed money, to seduce me. On the discovery of
+this act of atrocity, I determined to leave him, and in the most decided
+manner, for ever. I consider all obligation as made void by his conduct;
+and hold, that schisms which proceed from want of principles, can never
+be healed.
+
+"He received a fortune with me to the amount of five thousand pounds. On
+the death of my uncle, convinced that I could provide for my child, I
+destroyed the settlement of that fortune. I required none of my property
+to be returned to me, nor shall enumerate the sums extorted from me
+during six years that we lived together.
+
+"After leaving, what the law considers as my home, I was hunted like a
+criminal from place to place, though I contracted no debts, and demanded
+no maintenance--yet, as the laws sanction such proceeding, and make women
+the property of their husbands, I forbear to animadvert. After the birth
+of my daughter, and the death of my uncle, who left a very considerable
+property to myself and child, I was exposed to new persecution; and,
+because I had, before arriving at what is termed years of discretion,
+pledged my faith, I was treated by the world, as bound for ever to a man
+whose vices were notorious. Yet what are the vices generally known, to
+the various miseries that a woman may be subject to, which, though
+deeply felt, eating into the soul, elude description, and may be glossed
+over! A false morality is even established, which makes all the virtue of
+women consist in chastity, submission, and the forgiveness of injuries.
+
+"I pardon my oppressor--bitterly as I lament the loss of my child, torn
+from me in the most violent manner. But nature revolts, and my soul
+sickens at the bare supposition, that it could ever be a duty to pretend
+affection, when a separation is necessary to prevent my feeling hourly
+aversion.
+
+"To force me to give my fortune, I was imprisoned--yes; in a private
+mad-house.--There, in the heart of misery, I met the man charged with
+seducing me. We became attached--I deemed, and ever shall deem, myself
+free. The death of my babe dissolved the only tie which subsisted
+between me and my, what is termed, lawful husband.
+
+"To this person, thus encountered, I voluntarily gave myself, never
+considering myself as any more bound to transgress the laws of moral
+purity, because the will of my husband might be pleaded in my excuse,
+than to transgress those laws to which [the policy of artificial society
+has] annexed [positive] punishments.----While no command of a husband can
+prevent a woman from suffering for certain crimes, she must be allowed to
+consult her conscience, and regulate her conduct, in some degree, by her
+own sense of right. The respect I owe to myself, demanded my strict
+adherence to my determination of never viewing Mr. Venables in the light
+of a husband, nor could it forbid me from encouraging another. If I am
+unfortunately united to an unprincipled man, am I for ever to be shut out
+from fulfilling the duties of a wife and mother?--I wish my country to
+approve of my conduct; but, if laws exist, made by the strong to oppress
+the weak, I appeal to my own sense of justice, and declare that I will
+not live with the individual, who has violated every moral obligation
+which binds man to man.
+
+"I protest equally against any charge being brought to criminate the man,
+whom I consider as my husband. I was six-and-twenty when I left Mr.
+Venables' roof; if ever I am to be supposed to arrive at an age to direct
+my own actions, I must by that time have arrived at it.--I acted with
+deliberation.--Mr. Darnford found me a forlorn and oppressed woman, and
+promised the protection women in the present state of society want.--But
+the man who now claims me--was he deprived of my society by this conduct?
+The question is an insult to common sense, considering where Mr. Darnford
+met me.--Mr. Venables' door was indeed open to me--nay, threats and
+intreaties were used to induce me to return; but why? Was affection or
+honour the motive?--I cannot, it is true, dive into the recesses of the
+human heart--yet I presume to assert, [borne out as I am by a variety of
+circumstances,] that he was merely influenced by the most rapacious
+avarice.
+
+"I claim then a divorce, and the liberty of enjoying, free from
+molestation, the fortune left to me by a relation, who was well aware of
+the character of the man with whom I had to contend.--I appeal to the
+justice and humanity of the jury--a body of men, whose private judgment
+must be allowed to modify laws, that must be unjust, because definite
+rules can never apply to indefinite circumstances--and I deprecate
+punishment upon the man of my choice, freeing him, as I solemnly do, from
+the charge of seduction.]
+
+"I did not put myself into a situation to justify a charge of adultery,
+till I had, from conviction, shaken off the fetters which bound me to Mr.
+Venables.--While I lived with him, I defy the voice of calumny to sully
+what is termed the fair fame of woman.--Neglected by my husband, I never
+encouraged a lover; and preserved with scrupulous care, what is termed my
+honour, at the expence of my peace, till he, who should have been its
+guardian, laid traps to ensnare me. From that moment I believed myself,
+in the sight of heaven, free--and no power on earth shall force me to
+renounce my resolution."
+
+The judge, in summing up the evidence, alluded to "the fallacy of letting
+women plead their feelings, as an excuse for the violation of the
+marriage-vow. For his part, he had always determined to oppose all
+innovation, and the new-fangled notions which incroached on the good old
+rules of conduct. We did not want French principles in public or private
+life--and, if women were allowed to plead their feelings, as an excuse or
+palliation of infidelity, it was opening a flood-gate for immorality.
+What virtuous woman thought of her feelings?--It was her duty to love and
+obey the man chosen by her parents and relations, who were qualified by
+their experience to judge better for her, than she could for herself. As
+to the charges brought against the husband, they were vague, supported by
+no witnesses, excepting that of imprisonment in a private mad-house. The
+proofs of an insanity in the family, might render that however a prudent
+measure; and indeed the conduct of the lady did not appear that of a
+person of sane mind. Still such a mode of proceeding could not be
+justified, and might perhaps entitle the lady [in another court] to a
+sentence of separation from bed and board, during the joint lives of the
+parties; but he hoped that no Englishman would legalize adultery, by
+enabling the adulteress to enrich her seducer. Too many restrictions
+could not be thrown in the way of divorces, if we wished to maintain the
+sanctity of marriage; and, though they might bear a little hard on a few,
+very few individuals, it was evidently for the good of the whole."
+
+
+
+
+CONCLUSION,
+
+BY THE EDITOR.
+
+
+VERY few hints exist respecting the plan of the remainder of the work. I
+find only two detached sentences, and some scattered heads for the
+continuation of the story. I transcribe the whole.
+
+
+I.
+
+"Darnford's letters were affectionate; but circumstances occasioned
+delays, and the miscarriage of some letters rendered the reception of
+wished-for answers doubtful: his return was necessary to calm Maria's
+mind."
+
+
+II.
+
+"As Darnford had informed her that his business was settled, his delaying
+to return seemed extraordinary; but love to excess, excludes fear or
+suspicion."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The scattered heads for the continuation of the story, are as
+follow[159-A].
+
+
+I.
+
+"Trial for adultery--Maria defends herself--A separation from bed and
+board is the consequence--Her fortune is thrown into chancery--Darnford
+obtains a part of his property--Maria goes into the country."
+
+
+II.
+
+"A prosecution for adultery commenced--Trial--Darnford sets out for
+France--Letters--Once more pregnant--He returns--Mysterious
+behaviour--Visit--Expectation--Discovery--Interview--Consequence."
+
+
+III.
+
+"Sued by her husband--Damages awarded to him--Separation from bed and
+board--Darnford goes abroad--Maria into the country--Provides for her
+father--Is shunned--Returns to London--Expects to see her lover--The
+rack of expectation--Finds herself again with child--Delighted--A
+discovery--A visit--A miscarriage--Conclusion."
+
+
+IV.
+
+"Divorced by her husband--Her lover
+unfaithful--Pregnancy--Miscarriage--Suicide."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[The following passage appears in some respects to deviate from the
+preceding hints. It is superscribed]
+
+
+"THE END.
+
+
+"She swallowed the laudanum; her soul was calm--the tempest had
+subsided--and nothing remained but an eager longing to forget
+herself--to fly from the anguish she endured to escape from thought--from
+this hell of disappointment.
+
+"Still her eyes closed not--one remembrance with frightful velocity
+followed another--All the incidents of her life were in arms, embodied to
+assail her, and prevent her sinking into the sleep of death.--Her
+murdered child again appeared to her, mourning for the babe of which she
+was the tomb.--'And could it have a nobler?--Surely it is better to die
+with me, than to enter on life without a mother's care!--I cannot
+live!--but could I have deserted my child the moment it was born?--thrown
+it on the troubled wave of life, without a hand to support it?'--She
+looked up: 'What have I not suffered!--may I find a father where I am
+going!'--Her head turned; a stupor ensued; a faintness--'Have a little
+patience,' said Maria, holding her swimming head (she thought of her
+mother), 'this cannot last long; and what is a little bodily pain to the
+pangs I have endured?'
+
+"A new vision swam before her. Jemima seemed to enter--leading a little
+creature, that, with tottering footsteps, approached the bed. The voice
+of Jemima sounding as at a distance, called her--she tried to listen, to
+speak, to look!
+
+"'Behold your child!' exclaimed Jemima. Maria started off the bed, and
+fainted.--Violent vomiting followed.
+
+"When she was restored to life, Jemima addressed her with great
+solemnity: '------ led me to suspect, that your husband and brother had
+deceived you, and secreted the child. I would not torment you with
+doubtful hopes, and I left you (at a fatal moment) to search for the
+child!--I snatched her from misery--and (now she is alive again) would
+you leave her alone in the world, to endure what I have endured?'
+
+"Maria gazed wildly at her, her whole frame was convulsed with emotion;
+when the child, whom Jemima had been tutoring all the journey, uttered
+the word 'Mamma!' She caught her to her bosom, and burst into a passion
+of tears--then, resting the child gently on the bed, as if afraid of
+killing it,--she put her hand to her eyes, to conceal as it were the
+agonizing struggle of her soul. She remained silent for five minutes,
+crossing her arms over her bosom, and reclining her head,--then
+exclaimed: 'The conflict is over!--I will live for my child!'"
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+A few readers perhaps, in looking over these hints, will wonder how it
+could have been practicable, without tediousness, or remitting in any
+degree the interest of the story, to have filled, from these slight
+sketches, a number of pages, more considerable than those which have been
+already presented. But, in reality, these hints, simple as they are, are
+pregnant with passion and distress. It is the refuge of barren authors
+only, to crowd their fictions with so great a number of events, as to
+suffer no one of them to sink into the reader's mind. It is the province
+of true genius to develop events, to discover their capabilities, to
+ascertain the different passions and sentiments with which they are
+fraught, and to diversify them with incidents, that give reality to the
+picture, and take a hold upon the mind of a reader of taste, from which
+they can never be loosened. It was particularly the design of the author,
+in the present instance, to make her story subordinate to a great moral
+purpose, that "of exhibiting the misery and oppression, peculiar to
+women, that arise out of the partial laws and customs of society.--This
+view restrained her fancy[166-A]." It was necessary for her, to place in
+a striking point of view, evils that are too frequently overlooked, and
+to drag into light those details of oppression, of which the grosser and
+more insensible part of mankind make little account.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[159-A] To understand these minutes, it is necessary the reader should
+consider each of them as setting out from the same point in the story,
+_viz._ the point to which it is brought down in the preceding chapter.
+
+[166-A] See author's preface.
+
+
+
+
+LESSONS.
+
+
+ADVERTISEMENT,
+
+BY THE EDITOR.
+
+
+THE following pages will, I believe, be judged by every reader of taste
+to have been worth preserving, among the other testimonies the author
+left behind her, of her genius and the soundness of her understanding.
+To such readers I leave the task of comparing these lessons, with other
+works of the same nature previously published. It is obvious that the
+author has struck out a path of her own, and by no means intrenched upon
+the plans of her predecessors.
+
+It may however excite surprise in some persons to find these papers
+annexed to the conclusion of a novel. All I have to offer on this
+subject, consists in the following considerations:
+
+First, something is to be allowed for the difficulty of arranging the
+miscellaneous papers upon very different subjects, which will frequently
+constitute an author's posthumous works.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Secondly, the small portion they occupy in the present volume, will
+perhaps be accepted as an apology, by such good-natured readers (if any
+such there are), to whom the perusal of them shall be a matter of perfect
+indifference.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Thirdly, the circumstance which determined me in annexing them to the
+present work, was the slight association (in default of a strong one)
+between the affectionate and pathetic manner in which Maria Venables
+addresses her infant, in the Wrongs of Woman; and the agonising and
+painful sentiment with which the author originally bequeathed these
+papers, as a legacy for the benefit of her child.
+
+
+
+
+LESSONS.
+
+_The first book of a series which I intended to have written for my
+unfortunate girl[175-A]._
+
+
+LESSON I.
+
+CAT. Dog. Cow. Horse. Sheep. Pig. Bird. Fly.
+
+Man. Boy. Girl. Child.
+
+Head. Hair. Face. Nose. Mouth. Chin. Neck. Arms. Hand. Leg. Foot. Back.
+Breast.
+
+House. Wall. Field. Street. Stone. Grass.
+
+Bed. Chair. Door. Pot. Spoon. Knife. Fork. Plate. Cup. Box. Boy. Bell.
+
+Tree. Leaf. Stick. Whip. Cart. Coach.
+
+Frock. Hat. Coat. Shoes. Shift. Cap.
+
+Bread. Milk. Tea. Meat. Drink. Cake.
+
+
+LESSON II.
+
+Come. Walk. Run. Go. Jump. Dance. Ride. Sit. Stand. Play. Hold. Shake.
+Speak. Sing. Cry. Laugh. Call. Fall.
+
+Day. Night. Sun. Moon. Light. Dark. Sleep. Wake.
+
+Wash. Dress. Kiss. Comb.
+
+Fire. Hot. Burn. Wind. Rain. Cold.
+
+Hurt. Tear. Break. Spill.
+
+Book. See. Look.
+
+Sweet. Good. Clean.
+
+Gone. Lost. Hide. Keep. Give. Take.
+
+One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.
+
+White. Black. Red. Blue. Green. Brown.
+
+
+LESSON III.
+
+STROKE the cat. Play with the Dog. Eat the bread. Drink the milk. Hold
+the cup. Lay down the knife.
+
+Look at the fly. See the horse. Shut the door. Bring the chair. Ring the
+bell. Get your book.
+
+Hide your face. Wipe your nose. Wash your hands. Dirty hands. Why do you
+cry? A clean mouth. Shake hands. I love you. Kiss me now. Good girl.
+
+The bird sings. The fire burns. The cat jumps. The dog runs. The bird
+flies. The cow lies down. The man laughs. The child cries.
+
+
+LESSON IV.
+
+LET me comb your head. Ask Betty to wash your face. Go and see for some
+bread. Drink milk, if you are dry. Play on the floor with the ball. Do
+not touch the ink; you will black your hands.
+
+What do you want to say to me? Speak slow, not so fast. Did you fall? You
+will not cry, not you; the baby cries. Will you walk in the fields?
+
+
+LESSON V.
+
+COME to me, my little girl. Are you tired of playing? Yes. Sit down and
+rest yourself, while I talk to you.
+
+Have you seen the baby? Poor little thing. O here it comes. Look at him.
+How helpless he is. Four years ago you were as feeble as this very little
+boy.
+
+See, he cannot hold up his head. He is forced to lie on his back, if his
+mamma do not turn him to the right or left side, he will soon begin to
+cry. He cries to tell her, that he is tired with lying on his back.
+
+
+LESSON VI.
+
+PERHAPS he is hungry. What shall we give him to eat? Poor fellow, he
+cannot eat. Look in his mouth, he has no teeth.
+
+How did you do when you were a baby like him? You cannot tell. Do you
+want to know? Look then at the dog, with her pretty puppy. You could not
+help yourself as well as the puppy. You could only open your mouth, when
+you were lying, like William, on my knee. So I put you to my breast, and
+you sucked, as the puppy sucks now, for there was milk enough for you.
+
+
+LESSON VII.
+
+WHEN you were hungry, you began to cry, because you could not speak. You
+were seven months without teeth, always sucking. But after you got one,
+you began to gnaw a crust of bread. It was not long before another came
+pop. At ten months you had four pretty white teeth, and you used to bite
+me. Poor mamma! Still I did not cry, because I am not a child, but you
+hurt me very much. So I said to papa, it is time the little girl should
+eat. She is not naughty, yet she hurts me. I have given her a crust of
+bread, and I must look for some other milk.
+
+The cow has got plenty, and her jumping calf eats grass very well. He has
+got more teeth than my little girl. Yes, says papa, and he tapped you on
+the cheek, you are old enough to learn to eat? Come to me, and I will
+teach you, my little dear, for you must not hurt poor mamma, who has
+given you her milk, when you could not take any thing else.
+
+
+LESSON VIII.
+
+YOU were then on the carpet, for you could not walk well. So when you
+were in a hurry, you used to run quick, quick, quick, on your hands and
+feet, like the dog.
+
+Away you ran to papa, and putting both your arms round his leg, for your
+hands were not big enough, you looked up at him, and laughed. What did
+this laugh say, when you could not speak? Cannot you guess by what you
+now say to papa?--Ah! it was, Play with me, papa!--play with me!
+
+Papa began to smile, and you knew that the smile was always--Yes. So you
+got a ball, and papa threw it along the floor--Roll--roll--roll; and you
+ran after it again--and again. How pleased you were. Look at William, he
+smiles; but you could laugh loud--Ha! ha! ha!--Papa laughed louder than
+the little girl, and rolled the ball still faster.
+
+Then he put the ball on a chair, and you were forced to take hold of the
+back, and stand up to reach it. At last you reached too far, and down you
+fell: not indeed on your face, because you put out your hands. You were
+not much hurt; but the palms of your hands smarted with the pain, and you
+began to cry, like a little child.
+
+It is only very little children who cry when they are hurt; and it is to
+tell their mamma, that something is the matter with them. Now you can
+come to me, and say, Mamma, I have hurt myself. Pray rub my hand: it
+smarts. Put something on it, to make it well. A piece of rag, to stop the
+blood. You are not afraid of a little blood--not you. You scratched your
+arm with a pin: it bled a little; but it did you no harm. See, the skin
+is grown over it again.
+
+
+LESSON IX.
+
+TAKE care not to put pins in your mouth, because they will stick in your
+throat, and give you pain. Oh! you cannot think what pain a pin would
+give you in your throat, should it remain there: but, if you by chance
+swallow it, I should be obliged to give you, every morning, something
+bitter to drink. You never tasted any thing so bitter! and you would grow
+very sick. I never put pins in my mouth; but I am older than you, and
+know how to take care of myself.
+
+My mamma took care of me, when I was a little girl, like you. She bade me
+never put any thing in my mouth, without asking her what it was.
+
+When you were a baby, with no more sense than William, you put every
+thing in your mouth to gnaw, to help your teeth to cut through the skin.
+Look at the puppy, how he bites that piece of wood. William presses his
+gums against my finger. Poor boy! he is so young, he does not know what
+he is doing. When you bite any thing, it is because you are hungry.
+
+
+LESSON X.
+
+SEE how much taller you are than William. In four years you have learned
+to eat, to walk, to talk. Why do you smile? You can do much more, you
+think: you can wash your hands and face. Very well. I should never kiss a
+dirty face. And you can comb your head with the pretty comb you always
+put by in your own drawer. To be sure, you do all this to be ready to
+take a walk with me. You would be obliged to stay at home, if you could
+not comb your own hair. Betty is busy getting the dinner ready, and only
+brushes William's hair, because he cannot do it for himself.
+
+Betty is making an apple-pye. You love an apple-pye; but I do not bid you
+make one. Your hands are not strong enough to mix the butter and flour
+together; and you must not try to pare the apples, because you cannot
+manage a great knife.
+
+Never touch the large knives: they are very sharp, and you might cut your
+finger to the bone. You are a little girl, and ought to have a little
+knife. When you are as tall as I am, you shall have a knife as large as
+mine; and when you are as strong as I am, and have learned to manage it,
+you will not hurt yourself.
+
+You can trundle a hoop, you say; and jump over a stick. O, I forgot!--and
+march like the men in the red coats, when papa plays a pretty tune on the
+fiddle.
+
+
+LESSON XI.
+
+WHAT, you think that you shall soon be able to dress yourself entirely? I
+am glad of it: I have something else to do. You may go, and look for your
+frock in the drawer; but I will tie it, till you are stronger. Betty will
+tie it, when I am busy.
+
+I button my gown myself: I do not want a maid to assist me, when I am
+dressing. But you have not yet got sense enough to do it properly, and
+must beg somebody to help you, till you are older.
+
+Children grow older and wiser at the same time. William is not able to
+take a piece of meat, because he has not got the sense which would make
+him think that, without teeth, meat would do him harm. He cannot tell
+what is good for him.
+
+The sense of children grows with them. You know much more than William,
+now you walk alone, and talk; but you do not know as much as the boys and
+girls you see playing yonder, who are half as tall again as you; and they
+do not know half as much as their fathers and mothers, who are men and
+women grown. Papa and I were children, like you; and men and women took
+care of us. I carry William, because he is too weak to walk. I lift you
+over a stile, and over the gutter, when you cannot jump over it.
+
+You know already, that potatoes will not do you any harm: but I must
+pluck the fruit for you, till you are wise enough to know the ripe apples
+and pears. The hard ones would make you sick, and then you must take
+physic. You do not love physic: I do not love it any more than you. But I
+have more sense than you; therefore I take care not to eat unripe fruit,
+or any thing else that would make my stomach ache, or bring out ugly red
+spots on my face.
+
+When I was a child, my mamma chose the fruit for me, to prevent my making
+myself sick. I was just like you; I used to ask for what I saw, without
+knowing whether it was good or bad. Now I have lived a long time, I know
+what is good; I do not want any body to tell me.
+
+
+LESSON XII.
+
+LOOK at those two dogs. The old one brings the ball to me in a moment;
+the young one does not know how. He must be taught.
+
+I can cut your shift in a proper shape. You would not know how to begin.
+You would spoil it; but you will learn.
+
+John digs in the garden, and knows when to put the seed in the ground.
+You cannot tell whether it should be in the winter or summer. Try to find
+it out. When do the trees put out their leaves? In the spring, you say,
+after the cold weather. Fruit would not grow ripe without very warm
+weather. Now I am sure you can guess why the summer is the season for
+fruit.
+
+Papa knows that peas and beans are good for us to eat with our meat. You
+are glad when you see them; but if he did not think for you, and have the
+seed put in the ground, we should have no peas or beans.
+
+
+LESSON XIII.
+
+POOR child, she cannot do much for herself. When I let her do any thing
+for me, it is to please her: for I could do it better myself.
+
+Oh! the poor puppy has tumbled off the stool. Run and stroak him. Put a
+little milk in a saucer to comfort him. You have more sense than he. You
+can pour the milk into the saucer without spilling it. He would cry for a
+day with hunger, without being able to get it. You are wiser than the
+dog, you must help him. The dog will love you for it, and run after you.
+I feed you and take care of you: you love me and follow me for it.
+
+When the book fell down on your foot, it gave you great pain. The poor
+dog felt the same pain just now.
+
+Take care not to hurt him when you play with him. And every morning leave
+a little milk in your bason for him. Do not forget to put the bason in a
+corner, lest somebody should fall over it.
+
+When the snow covers the ground, save the crumbs of bread for the birds.
+In the summer they find feed enough, and do not want you to think about
+them.
+
+I make broth for the poor man who is sick. A sick man is like a child, he
+cannot help himself.
+
+
+LESSON X.
+
+WHEN I caught cold some time ago, I had such a pain in my head, I could
+scarcely hold it up. Papa opened the door very softly, because he loves
+me. You love me, yet you made a noise. You had not the sense to know that
+it made my head worse, till papa told you.
+
+Papa had a pain in the stomach, and he would not eat the fine cherries or
+grapes on the table. When I brought him a cup of camomile tea, he drank
+it without saying a word, or making an ugly face. He knows that I love
+him, and that I would not give him any thing to drink that has a bad
+taste, if it were not to do him good.
+
+You asked me for some apples when your stomach ached; but I was not angry
+with you. If you had been as wise as papa, you would have said, I will
+not eat the apples to-day, I must take some camomile tea.
+
+You say that you do not know how to think. Yes; you do a little. The
+other day papa was tired; he had been walking about all the morning.
+After dinner he fell asleep on the sopha. I did not bid you be quiet; but
+you thought of what papa said to you, when my head ached. This made you
+think that you ought not to make a noise, when papa was resting himself.
+So you came to me, and said to me, very softly, Pray reach me my ball,
+and I will go and play in the garden, till papa wakes.
+
+You were going out; but thinking again, you came back to me on your
+tip-toes. Whisper----whisper. Pray mama, call me, when papa wakes; for I
+shall be afraid to open the door to see, lest I should disturb him.
+
+Away you went.--Creep--creep--and shut the door as softly as I could have
+done myself.
+
+That was thinking. When a child does wrong at first, she does not know
+any better. But, after she has been told that she must not disturb mama,
+when poor mama is unwell, she thinks herself, that she must not wake papa
+when he is tired.
+
+Another day we will see if you can think about any thing else.
+
+THE END.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[175-A] This title which is indorsed on the back of the manuscript, I
+conclude to have been written in a period of desperation, in the month of
+October, 1795.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. III.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+LETTERS
+AND
+MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.
+
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+
+
+VOL. I.
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE.
+
+
+THE following Letters may possibly be found to contain the finest
+examples of the language of sentiment and passion ever presented to the
+world. They bear a striking resemblance to the celebrated romance of
+Werter, though the incidents to which they relate are of a very different
+cast. Probably the readers to whom Werter is incapable of affording
+pleasure, will receive no delight from the present publication. The
+editor apprehends that, in the judgment of those best qualified to
+decide upon the comparison, these Letters will be admitted to have the
+superiority over the fiction of Goethe. They are the offspring of a
+glowing imagination, and a heart penetrated with the passion it essays to
+describe.
+
+To the series of letters constituting the principal article in these two
+volumes, are added various pieces, none of which, it is hoped, will be
+found discreditable to the talents of the author. The slight fragment of
+Letters on the Management of Infants, may be thought a trifle; but it
+seems to have some value, as presenting to us with vividness the
+intention of the writer on this important subject. The publication of a
+few select Letters to Mr. Johnson, appeared to be at once a just monument
+to the sincerity of his friendship, and a valuable and interesting
+specimen of the mind of the writer. The Letter on the Present Character
+of the French Nation, the Extract of the Cave of Fancy, a Tale, and the
+Hints for the Second Part of the Rights of Woman, may, I believe, safely
+be left to speak for themselves. The Essay on Poetry and our Relish for
+the Beauties of Nature, appeared in the Monthly Magazine for April last,
+and is the only piece in this collection which has previously found its
+way to the press.
+
+
+
+
+LETTERS.
+
+
+LETTER I.
+
+Two o'Clock.
+
+MY dear love, after making my arrangements for our snug dinner to-day, I
+have been taken by storm, and obliged to promise to dine, at an early
+hour, with the Miss ----s, the _only_ day they intend to pass here. I
+shall however leave the key in the door, and hope to find you at my
+fire-side when I return, about eight o'clock. Will you not wait for poor
+Joan?--whom you will find better, and till then think very
+affectionately of her.
+
+Yours, truly,
+
+* * * *
+
+I am sitting down to dinner; so do not send an answer.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER II.
+
+Past Twelve o'Clock, Monday night.
+
+[August.]
+
+I OBEY an emotion of my heart, which made me think of wishing thee, my
+love, good-night! before I go to rest, with more tenderness than I can
+to-morrow, when writing a hasty line or two under Colonel ----'s eye. You
+can scarcely imagine with what pleasure I anticipate the day, when we
+are to begin almost to live together; and you would smile to hear how
+many plans of employment I have in my head, now that I am confident my
+heart has found peace in your bosom.--Cherish me with that dignified
+tenderness, which I have only found in you; and your own dear girl will
+try to keep under a quickness of feeling, that has sometimes given you
+pain--Yes, I will be _good_, that I may deserve to be happy; and whilst
+you love me, I cannot again fall into the miserable state, which rendered
+life a burthen almost too heavy to be borne.
+
+But, good-night!--God bless you! Sterne says, that is equal to a
+kiss--yet I would rather give you the kiss into the bargain, glowing with
+gratitude to Heaven, and affection to you. I like the word affection,
+because it signifies something habitual; and we are soon to meet, to try
+whether we have mind enough to keep our hearts warm.
+
+* * * *
+
+I will be at the barrier a little after ten o'clock
+to-morrow[4-A].--Yours--
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER III.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+YOU have often called me, dear girl, but you would now say good, did you
+know how very attentive I have been to the ---- ever since I came to
+Paris. I am not however going to trouble you with the account, because I
+like to see your eyes praise me; and, Milton insinuates, that, during
+such recitals, there are interruptions, not ungrateful to the heart, when
+the honey that drops from the lips is not merely words.
+
+Yet, I shall not (let me tell you before these people enter, to force me
+to huddle away my letter) be content with only a kiss of DUTY--you _must_
+be glad to see me--because you are glad--or I will make love to the
+_shade_ of Mirabeau, to whom my heart continually turned, whilst I was
+talking with Madame ----, forcibly telling me, that it will ever have
+sufficient warmth to love, whether I will or not, sentiment, though I so
+highly respect principle.----
+
+Not that I think Mirabeau utterly devoid of principles--Far from it--and,
+if I had not begun to form a new theory respecting men, I should, in the
+vanity of my heart, have _imagined_ that _I_ could have made something of
+his----it was composed of such materials--Hush! here they come--and love
+flies away in the twinkling of an eye, leaving a little brush of his wing
+on my pale cheeks.
+
+I hope to see Dr. ---- this morning; I am going to Mr. ----'s to meet
+him. ----, and some others, are invited to dine with us to-day; and
+to-morrow I am to spend the day with ----.
+
+I shall probably not be able to return to ---- to-morrow; but it is no
+matter, because I must take a carriage, I have so many books, that I
+immediately want, to take with me.--On Friday then I shall expect you to
+dine with me--and, if you come a little before dinner, it is so long
+since I have seen you, you will not be scolded by yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IV[7-A].
+
+Friday Morning [September.]
+
+A MAN, whom a letter from Mr. ----previously announced, called here
+yesterday for the payment of a draft; and, as he seemed disappointed at
+not finding you at home, I sent him to Mr. ----. I have since seen him,
+and he tells me that he has settled the business.
+
+So much for business!--May I venture to talk a little longer about less
+weighty affairs?--How are you?--I have been following you all along the
+road this comfortless weather; for, when I am absent from those I love,
+my imagination is as lively, as if my senses had never been gratified by
+their presence--I was going to say caresses--and why should I not? I have
+found out that I have more mind than you, in one respect; because I can,
+without any violent effort of reason, find food for love in the same
+object, much longer than you can.--The way to my senses is through my
+heart; but, forgive me! I think there is sometimes a shorter cut to
+yours.
+
+With ninety-nine men out of a hundred, a very sufficient dash of folly is
+necessary to render a woman _piquante_, a soft word for desirable; and,
+beyond these casual ebullitions of sympathy, few look for enjoyment by
+fostering a passion in their hearts. One reason, in short, why I wish my
+whole sex to become wiser, is, that the foolish ones may not, by their
+pretty folly, rob those whose sensibility keeps down their vanity, of the
+few roses that afford them some solace in the thorny road of life.
+
+I do not know how I fell into these reflections, excepting one thought
+produced it--that these continual separations were necessary to warm your
+affection.--Of late, we are always separating.--Crack!--crack!--and away
+you go.--This joke wears the sallow cast of thought; for, though I began
+to write cheerfully, some melancholy tears have found their way into my
+eyes, that linger there, whilst a glow of tenderness at my heart whispers
+that you are one of the best creatures in the world.--Pardon then the
+vagaries of a mind, that has been almost "crazed by care," as well as
+"crossed in hapless love," and bear with me a _little_ longer!--When we
+are settled in the country together, more duties will open before me, and
+my heart, which now, trembling into peace, is agitated by every emotion
+that awakens the remembrance of old griefs, will learn to rest on yours,
+with that dignity your character, not to talk of my own, demands.
+
+Take care of yourself--and write soon to your own girl (you may add dear,
+if you please) who sincerely loves you, and will try to convince you of
+it, by becoming happier.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER V.
+
+Sunday Night.
+
+I HAVE just received your letter, and feel as if I could not go to bed
+tranquilly without saying a few words in reply--merely to tell you, that
+my mind is serene, and my heart affectionate.
+
+Ever since you last saw me inclined to faint, I have felt some gentle
+twitches, which make me begin to think, that I am nourishing a creature
+who will soon be sensible of my care.--This thought has not only produced
+an overflowing of tenderness to you, but made me very attentive to calm
+my mind and take exercise, lest I should destroy an object, in whom we
+are to have a mutual interest, you know. Yesterday--do not
+smile!--finding that I had hurt myself by lifting precipitately a large
+log of wood, I sat down in an agony, till I felt those said twitches
+again.
+
+Are you very busy?
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+So you may reckon on its being finished soon, though not before you come
+home, unless you are detained longer than I now allow myself to believe
+you will.--
+
+Be that as it may, write to me, my best love, and bid me be
+patient--kindly--and the expressions of kindness will again beguile the
+time, as sweetly as they have done to-night.--Tell me also over and over
+again, that your happiness (and you deserve to be happy!) is closely
+connected with mine, and I will try to dissipate, as they rise, the fumes
+of former discontent, that have too often clouded the sunshine, which you
+have endeavoured to diffuse through my mind. God bless you! Take care of
+yourself, and remember with tenderness your affectionate
+
+* * * *
+
+I am going to rest very happy, and you have made me so.--This is the
+kindest good-night I can utter.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VI.
+
+Friday Morning.
+
+I AM glad to find that other people can be unreasonable, as well as
+myself--for be it known to thee, that I answered thy _first_ letter, the
+very night it reached me (Sunday), though thou couldst not receive it
+before Wednesday, because it was not sent off till the next day.--There
+is a full, true, and particular account.--
+
+Yet I am not angry with thee, my love, for I think that it is a proof of
+stupidity, and likewise of a milk-and-water affection, which comes to the
+same thing, when the temper is governed by a square and compass.--There
+is nothing picturesque in this straight-lined equality, and the passions
+always give grace to the actions.
+
+Recollection now makes my heart bound to thee; but, it is not to thy
+money-getting face, though I cannot be seriously displeased with the
+exertion which increases my esteem, or rather is what I should have
+expected from thy character.--No; I have thy honest countenance before
+me--Pop--relaxed by tenderness; a little--little wounded by my whims; and
+thy eyes glistening with sympathy.--Thy lips then feel softer than
+soft--and I rest my cheek on thine, forgetting all the world.--I have not
+left the hue of love out of the picture--the rosy glow; and fancy has
+spread it over my own cheeks, I believe, for I feel them burning, whilst
+a delicious tear trembles in my eye, that would be all your own, if a
+grateful emotion directed to the Father of nature, who has made me thus
+alive to happiness, did not give more warmth to the sentiment it
+divides--I must pause a moment.
+
+Need I tell you that I am tranquil after writing thus?--I do not know
+why, but I have more confidence in your affection, when absent, than
+present; nay, I think that you must love me, for, in the sincerity of my
+heart let me say it, I believe I deserve your tenderness, because I am
+true, and have a degree of sensibility that you can see and relish.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VII.
+
+Sunday Morning [December 29.]
+
+YOU seem to have taken up your abode at H----. Pray sir! when do you
+think of coming home? or, to write very considerately, when will business
+permit you? I shall expect (as the country people say in England) that
+you will make a _power_ of money to indemnify me for your absence.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Well! but, my love, to the old story--am I to see you this week, or this
+month?--I do not know what you are about--for, as you did not tell me, I
+would not ask Mr. ----, who is generally pretty communicative.
+
+I long to see Mrs. ------; not to hear from you, so do not give yourself
+airs, but to get a letter from Mr. ----. And I am half angry with you for
+not informing me whether she had brought one with her or not.--On this
+score I will cork up some of the kind things that were ready to drop from
+my pen, which has never been dipt in gall when addressing you; or, will
+only suffer an exclamation--"The creature!" or a kind look, to escape me,
+when I pass the slippers--which I could not remove from my _salle_ door,
+though they are not the handsomest of their kind.
+
+Be not too anxious to get money!--for nothing worth having is to be
+purchased. God bless you.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VIII.
+
+Monday Night [December 30.]
+
+MY best love, your letter to-night was particularly grateful to my heart,
+depressed by the letters I received by ----, for he brought me several,
+and the parcel of books directed to Mr. ------ was for me. Mr. ------'s
+letter was long and very affectionate; but the account he gives me of his
+own affairs, though he obviously makes the best of them, has vexed me.
+
+A melancholy letter from my sister ------ has also harrassed my
+mind--that from my brother would have given me sincere pleasure; but for
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+There is a spirit of independence in his letter, that will please you;
+and you shall see it, when we are once more over the fire together.--I
+think that you would hail him as a brother, with one of your tender
+looks, when your heart not only gives a lustre to your eye, but a dance
+of playfulness, that he would meet with a glow half made up of
+bashfulness, and a desire to please the----where shall I find a word to
+express the relationship which subsists between us?--Shall I ask the
+little twitcher?--But I have dropt half the sentence that was to tell you
+how much he would be inclined to love the man loved by his sister. I have
+been fancying myself sitting between you, ever since I began to write,
+and my heart has leaped at the thought!--You see how I chat to you.
+
+I did not receive your letter till I came home; and I did not expect it,
+for the post came in much later than usual. It was a cordial to me--and I
+wanted one.
+
+Mr. ---- tells me that he has written again and again.--Love him a
+little!--It would be a kind of separation, if you did not love those I
+love.
+
+There was so much considerate tenderness in your epistle to-night, that,
+if it has not made you dearer to me, it has made me forcibly feel how
+very dear you are to me, by charming away half my cares.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IX.
+
+Tuesday Morning [December 31.]
+
+THOUGH I have just sent a letter off, yet, as captain ---- offers to take
+one, I am not willing to let him go without a kind greeting, because
+trifles of this sort, without having any effect on my mind, damp my
+spirits:--and you, with all your struggles to be manly, have some of this
+same sensibility.--Do not bid it begone, for I love to see it striving to
+master your features; besides, these kind of sympathies are the life of
+affection: and why, in cultivating our understandings, should we try to
+dry up these springs of pleasure, which gush out to give a freshness to
+days browned by care!
+
+The books sent to me are such as we may read together; so I shall not
+look into them till you return; when you shall read, whilst I mend my
+stockings.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER X.
+
+Wednesday Night [January 1.]
+
+AS I have been, you tell me, three days without writing, I ought not to
+complain of two: yet, as I expected to receive a letter this afternoon, I
+am hurt; and why should I, by concealing it, affect the heroism I do not
+feel?
+
+I hate commerce. How differently must ------'s head and heart be
+organized from mine! You will tell me, that exertions are necessary: I am
+weary of them! The face of things, public and private, vexes me. The
+"peace" and clemency which seemed to be dawning a few days ago, disappear
+again. "I am fallen," as Milton said, "on evil days;" for I really
+believe that Europe will be in a state of convulsion, during half a
+century at least. Life is but a labour of patience: it is always rolling
+a great stone up a hill; for, before a person can find a resting-place,
+imagining it is lodged, down it comes again, and all the work is to be
+done over anew!
+
+Should I attempt to write any more, I could not change the strain. My
+head aches, and my heart is heavy. The world appears an "unweeded
+garden," where "things rank and vile" flourish best.
+
+If you do not return soon--or, which is no such mighty matter, talk of
+it--I will throw your slippers out at window, and be off--nobody knows
+where.
+
+* * * *
+
+Finding that I was observed, I told the good women, the two Mrs. ----s,
+simply that I was with child: and let them stare! and ------, and ------,
+nay, all the world, may know it for aught I care!--Yet I wish to avoid
+------'s coarse jokes.
+
+Considering the care and anxiety a woman must have about a child before
+it comes into the world, it seems to me, by a _natural right_, to belong
+to her. When men get immersed in the world, they seem to lose all
+sensations, excepting those necessary to continue or produce life!--Are
+these the privileges of reason? Amongst the feathered race, whilst the
+hen keeps the young warm, her mate stays by to cheer her; but it is
+sufficient for man to condescend to get a child, in order to claim it.--A
+man is a tyrant!
+
+You may now tell me, that, if it were not for me, you would be laughing
+away with some honest fellows in L--n. The casual exercise of social
+sympathy would not be sufficient for me--I should not think such an
+heartless life worth preserving.--It is necessary to be in good-humour
+with you, to be pleased with the world.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Thursday Morning.
+
+I WAS very low-spirited last night, ready to quarrel with your cheerful
+temper, which makes absence easy to you.--And, why should I mince the the
+matter? I was offended at your not even mentioning it.--I do not want to
+be loved like a goddess; but I wish to be necessary to you. God bless
+you[27-A]!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XI.
+
+Monday Night.
+
+I HAVE just received your kind and rational letter, and would fain hide
+my face, glowing with shame for my folly.--I would hide it in your bosom,
+if you would again open it to me, and nestle closely till you bade my
+fluttering heart be still, by saying that you forgave me. With eyes
+overflowing with tears, and in the humblest attitude, I intreat you.--Do
+not turn from me, for indeed I love you fondly, and have been very
+wretched, since the night I was so cruelly hurt by thinking that you had
+no confidence in me----
+
+It is time for me to grow more reasonable, a few more of these caprices
+of sensibility would destroy me. I have, in fact, been very much
+indisposed for a few days past, and the notion that I was tormenting, or
+perhaps killing, a poor little animal, about whom I am grown anxious and
+tender, now I feel it alive, made me worse. My bowels have been
+dreadfully disordered, and every thing I ate or drank disagreed with my
+stomach; still I feel intimations of its existence, though they have been
+fainter.
+
+Do you think that the creature goes regularly to sleep? I am ready to ask
+as many questions as Voltaire's Man of Forty Crowns. Ah! do not continue
+to be angry with me! You perceive that I am already smiling through my
+tears--You have lightened my heart, and my frozen spirits are melting
+into playfulness.
+
+Write the moment you receive this. I shall count the minutes. But drop
+not an angry word--I cannot now bear it. Yet, if you think I deserve a
+scolding (it does not admit of a question, I grant), wait till you come
+back--and then, if you are angry one day, I shall be sure of seeing you
+the next.
+
+------ did not write to you, I suppose, because he talked of going to
+H----. Hearing that I was ill, he called very kindly on me, not dreaming
+that it was some words that he incautiously let fall, which rendered me
+so.
+
+God bless you, my love; do not shut your heart against a return of
+tenderness; and, as I now in fancy cling to you, be more than ever my
+support.--Feel but as affectionate when you read this letter, as I did
+writing it, and you will make happy, your
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XII.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+I WILL never, if I am not entirely cured of quarrelling, begin to
+encourage "quick-coming fancies," when we are separated. Yesterday, my
+love, I could not open your letter for some time; and, though it was not
+half as severe as I merited, it threw me into such a fit of trembling, as
+seriously alarmed me. I did not, as you may suppose, care for a little
+pain on my own account; but all the fears which I have had for a few days
+past, returned with fresh force. This morning I am better; will you not
+be glad to hear it? You perceive that sorrow has almost made a child of
+me, and that I want to be soothed to peace.
+
+One thing you mistake in my character, and imagine that to be coldness
+which is just the contrary. For, when I am hurt by the person most dear
+to me, I must let out a whole torrent of emotions, in which tenderness
+would be uppermost, or stifle them altogether; and it appears to me
+almost a duty to stifle them, when I imagine _that I am treated with
+coldness_.
+
+I am afraid that I have vexed you, my own ----. I know the quickness of
+your feelings--and let me, in the sincerity of my heart, assure you,
+there is nothing I would not suffer to make you happy. My own happiness
+wholly depends on you--and, knowing you, when my reason is not clouded, I
+look forward to a rational prospect of as much felicity as the earth
+affords--with a little dash of rapture into the bargain, if you will look
+at me, when we meet again, as you have sometimes greeted, your humbled,
+yet most affectionate
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIII.
+
+Thursday Night.
+
+I HAVE been wishing the time away, my kind love, unable to rest till I
+knew that my penitential letter had reached your hand--and this
+afternoon, when your tender epistle of Tuesday gave such exquisite
+pleasure to your poor sick girl, her heart smote her to think that you
+were still to receive another cold one.--Burn it also, my ----; yet do
+not forget that even those letters were full of love; and I shall ever
+recollect, that you did not wait to be mollified by my penitence, before
+you took me again to your heart.
+
+I have been unwell, and would not, now I am recovering, take a journey,
+because I have been seriously alarmed and angry with myself, dreading
+continually the fatal consequence of my folly.--But, should you think it
+right to remain at H--, I shall find some opportunity, in the course of a
+fortnight, or less perhaps, to come to you, and before then I shall be
+strong again.--Yet do not be uneasy! I am really better, and never took
+such care of myself, as I have done since you restored my peace of mind.
+The girl is come to warm my bed--so I will tenderly say, good night! and
+write a line or two in the morning.
+
+Morning.
+
+I WISH you were here to walk with me this fine morning! yet your absence
+shall not prevent me. I have stayed at home too much; though, when I was
+so dreadfully out of spirits, I was careless of every thing.
+
+I will now sally forth (you will go with me in my heart) and try whether
+this fine bracing air will not give the vigour to the poor babe, it had,
+before I so inconsiderately gave way to the grief that deranged my
+bowels, and gave a turn to my whole system.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *  * * * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIV.
+
+Saturday Morning.
+
+THE two or three letters, which I have written to you lately, my love,
+will serve as an answer to your explanatory one. I cannot but respect
+your motives and conduct. I always respected them; and was only hurt, by
+what seemed to me a want of confidence, and consequently affection.--I
+thought also, that if you were obliged to stay three months at H--, I
+might as well have been with you.--Well! well, what signifies what I
+brooded over--Let us now be friends!
+
+I shall probably receive a letter from you to-day, sealing my pardon--and
+I will be careful not to torment you with my querulous humours, at
+least, till I see you again. Act as circumstances direct, and I will not
+enquire when they will permit you to return, convinced that you will
+hasten to your * * * *, when you have attained (or lost sight of) the
+object of your journey.
+
+What a picture have you sketched of our fire-side! Yes, my love, my fancy
+was instantly at work, and I found my head on your shoulder, whilst my
+eyes were fixed on the little creatures that were clinging about your
+knees. I did not absolutely determine that there should be six--if you
+have not set your heart on this round number.
+
+I am going to dine with Mrs. ----. I have not been to visit her since the
+first day she came to Paris. I wish indeed to be out in the air as much
+as I can; for the exercise I have taken these two or three days past,
+has been of such service to me, that I hope shortly to tell you, that I
+am quite well. I have scarcely slept before last night, and then not
+much.--The two Mrs. ------s have been very anxious and tender.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+I need not desire you to give the colonel a good bottle of wine.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XV.
+
+Sunday Morning.
+
+I WROTE to you yesterday, my ----; but, finding that the colonel is still
+detained (for his passport was forgotten at the office yesterday) I am
+not willing to let so many days elapse without your hearing from me,
+after having talked of illness and apprehensions.
+
+I cannot boast of being quite recovered, yet I am (I must use my
+Yorkshire phrase; for, when my heart is warm, pop come the expressions of
+childhood into my head) so _lightsome_, that I think it will not _go
+badly with me_.--And nothing shall be wanting on my part, I assure you;
+for I am urged on, not only by an enlivened affection for you, but by a
+new-born tenderness that plays cheerly round my dilating heart.
+
+I was therefore, in defiance of cold and dirt, out in the air the greater
+part of yesterday; and, if I get over this evening without a return of
+the fever that has tormented me, I shall talk no more of illness. I have
+promised the little creature, that its mother, who ought to cherish it,
+will not again plague it, and begged it to pardon me; and, since I could
+not hug either it or you to my breast, I have to my heart.--I am afraid
+to read over this prattle--but it is only for your eye.
+
+I have been seriously vexed, to find that, whilst you were harrassed by
+impediments in your undertakings, I was giving you additional
+uneasiness.--If you can make any of your plans answer--it is well, I do
+not think a _little_ money inconvenient; but, should they fail, we will
+struggle cheerfully together--drawn closer by the pinching blasts of
+poverty.
+
+Adieu, my love! Write often to your poor girl, and write long letters;
+for I not only like them for being longer, but because more heart steals
+into them; and I am happy to catch your heart whenever I can.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVI.
+
+Tuesday Morning.
+
+I SEIZE this opportunity to inform you, that I am to set out on Thursday
+with Mr. ------, and hope to tell you soon (on your lips) how glad I
+shall be to see you. I have just got my passport, so I do not foresee any
+impediment to my reaching H----, to bid you good-night next Friday in my
+new apartment--where I am to meet you and love, in spite of care, to
+smile me to sleep--for I have not caught much rest since we parted.
+
+You have, by your tenderness and worth, twisted yourself more artfully
+round my heart, than I supposed possible.--Let me indulge the thought,
+that I have thrown out some tendrils to cling to the elm by which I wish
+to be supported.--This is talking a new language for me!--But, knowing
+that I am not a parasite-plant, I am willing to receive the proofs of
+affection, that every pulse replies to, when I think of being once more
+in the same house with you.--God bless you!
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVII.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+I ONLY send this as an _avant-coureur_, without jack-boots, to tell you,
+that I am again on the wing, and hope to be with you a few hours after
+you receive it. I shall find you well, and composed, I am sure; or, more
+properly speaking, cheerful.--What is the reason that my spirits are not
+as manageable as yours? Yet, now I think of it, I will not allow that
+your temper is even, though I have promised myself, in order to obtain my
+own forgiveness, that I will not ruffle it for a long, long time--I am
+afraid to say never.
+
+Farewell for a moment!--Do not forget that I am driving towards you in
+person! My mind, unfettered, has flown to you long since, or rather has
+never left you.
+
+I am well, and have no apprehension that I shall find the journey too
+fatiguing, when I follow the lead of my heart.--With my face turned to
+H--my spirits will not sink--and my mind has always hitherto enabled my
+body to do whatever I wished.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVIII.
+
+H--, Thursday Morning, March 12.
+
+WE are such creatures of habit, my love, that, though I cannot say I was
+sorry, childishly so, for your going, when I knew that you were to stay
+such a short time, and I had a plan of employment; yet I could not
+sleep.--I turned to your side of the bed, and tried to make the most of
+the comfort of the pillow, which you used to tell me I was churlish
+about; but all would not do.--I took nevertheless my walk before
+breakfast, though the weather was not very inviting--and here I am,
+wishing you a finer day, and seeing you peep over my shoulder, as I
+write, with one of your kindest looks--when your eyes glisten, and a
+suffusion creeps over your relaxing features.
+
+But I do not mean to dally with you this morning--So God bless you! Take
+care of yourself--and sometimes fold to your heart your affectionate
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIX.
+
+DO not call me stupid, for leaving on the table the little bit of paper I
+was to inclose.--This comes of being in love at the fag-end of a letter
+of business.--You know, you say, they will not chime together.--I had got
+you by the fire-side, with the _gigot_ smoking on the board, to lard your
+poor bare ribs--and behold, I closed my letter without taking the paper
+up, that was directly under my eyes!--What had I got in them to render me
+so blind?--I give you leave to answer the question, if you will not
+scold; for I am
+
+Yours most affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XX.
+
+Sunday, August 17.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I have promised ------ to go with him to his country-house, where he is
+now permitted to dine--I, and the little darling, to be sure[47-A]--whom
+I cannot help kissing with more fondness, since you left us. I think I
+shall enjoy the fine prospect, and that it will rather enliven, than
+satiate my imagination.
+
+I have called on Mrs. ------. She has the manners of a gentlewoman, with
+a dash of the easy French coquetry, which renders her _piquante_.--But
+_Monsieur_ her husband, whom nature never dreamed of casting in either
+the mould of a gentleman or lover, makes but an aukward figure in the
+foreground of the picture.
+
+The H----s are very ugly, without doubt--and the house smelt of commerce
+from top to toe--so that his abortive attempt to display taste, only
+proved it to be one of the things not to be bought with gold. I was in a
+room a moment alone, and my attention was attracted by the _pendule_--A
+nymph was offering up her vows before a smoking altar, to a fat-bottomed
+Cupid (saving your presence), who was kicking his heels in the air.--Ah!
+kick on, thought I; for the demon of traffic will ever fright away the
+loves and graces, that streak with the rosy beams of infant fancy the
+_sombre_ day of life--whilst the imagination, not allowing us to see
+things as they are, enables us to catch a hasty draught of the running
+stream of delight, the thirst for which seems to be given only to
+tantalize us.
+
+But I am philosophizing; nay, perhaps you will call me severe, and bid me
+let the square-headed money-getters alone.--Peace to them! though none of
+the social sprites (and there are not a few of different descriptions,
+who sport about the various inlets to my heart) gave me a twitch to
+restrain my pen.
+
+I have been writing on, expecting poor ------ to come; for, when I began,
+I merely thought of business; and, as this is the idea that most
+naturally associates with your image, I wonder I stumbled on any other.
+
+Yet, as common life, in my opinion, is scarcely worth having, even with a
+_gigot_ every day, and a pudding added thereunto, I will allow you to
+cultivate my judgment, if you will permit me to keep alive the sentiments
+in your heart, which may be termed romantic, because, the offspring of
+the senses and the imagination, they resemble the mother more than the
+father[50-A], when they produce the suffusion I admire.--In spite of icy
+age, I hope still to see it, if you have not determined only to eat and
+drink, and be stupidly useful to the stupid--
+
+Yours
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXI.
+
+H--, August 19, Tuesday.
+
+I RECEIVED both your letters to-day--I had reckoned on hearing from you
+yesterday, therefore was disappointed, though I imputed your silence to
+the right cause. I intended answering your kind letter immediately, that
+you might have felt the pleasure it gave me; but ------ came in, and
+some other things interrupted me; so that the fine vapour has
+evaporated--yet, leaving a sweet scent behind, I have only to tell you,
+what is sufficiently obvious, that the earnest desire I have shown to
+keep my place, or gain more ground in your heart, is a sure proof how
+necessary your affection is to my happiness.--Still I do not think it
+false delicacy, or foolish pride, to wish that your attention to my
+happiness should arise _as much_ from love, which is always rather a
+selfish passion, as reason--that is, I want you to promote my felicity,
+by seeking your own.--For, whatever pleasure it may give me to discover
+your generosity of soul, I would not be dependent for your affection on
+the very quality I most admire. No; there are qualities in your heart,
+which demand my affection; but, unless the attachment appears to me
+clearly mutual, I shall labour only to esteem your character, instead of
+cherishing a tenderness for your person.
+
+I write in a hurry, because the little one, who has been sleeping a long
+time, begins to call for me. Poor thing! when I am sad, I lament that all
+my affections grow on me, till they become too strong for my peace,
+though they all afford me snatches of exquisite enjoyment--This for our
+little girl was at first very reasonable--more the effect of reason, a
+sense of duty, than feeling--now, she has got into my heart and
+imagination, and when I walk out without her, her little figure is ever
+dancing before me.
+
+You too have somehow clung round my heart--I found I could not eat my
+dinner in the great room--and, when I took up the large knife to carve
+for myself, tears rushed into my eyes.--Do not however suppose that I am
+melancholy--for, when you are from me, I not only wonder how I can find
+fault with you--but how I can doubt your affection.
+
+I will not mix any comments on the inclosed (it roused my indignation)
+with the effusion of tenderness, with which I assure you, that you are
+the friend of my bosom, and the prop of my heart.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXII.
+
+H--, August 20.
+
+I WANT to know what steps you have taken respecting ----. Knavery always
+rouses my indignation--I should be gratified to hear that the law had
+chastised ------ severely; but I do not wish you to see him, because the
+business does not now admit of peaceful discussion, and I do not exactly
+know how you would express your contempt.
+
+Pray ask some questions about Tallien--I am still pleased with the
+dignity of his conduct.--The other day, in the cause of humanity, he made
+use of a degree of address, which I admire--and mean to point out to
+you, as one of the few instances of address which do credit to the
+abilities of the man, without taking away from that confidence in his
+openness of heart, which is the true basis of both public and private
+friendship.
+
+Do not suppose that I mean to allude to a little reserve of temper in
+you, of which I have sometimes complained! You have been used to a
+cunning woman, and you almost look for cunning--Nay, in _managing_ my
+happiness, you now and then wounded my sensibility, concealing yourself,
+till honest sympathy, giving you to me without disguise, lets me look
+into a heart, which my half-broken one wishes to creep into, to be
+revived and cherished.----You have frankness of heart, but not often
+exactly that overflowing (_épanchement de coeur_), which becoming almost
+childish, appears a weakness only to the weak.
+
+But I have left poor Tallien. I wanted you to enquire likewise whether,
+as a member declared in the convention, Robespierre really maintained a
+_number_ of mistresses.--Should it prove so, I suspect that they rather
+flattered his vanity than his senses.
+
+Here is a chatting, desultory epistle! But do not suppose that I mean to
+close it without mentioning the little damsel--who has been almost
+springing out of my arm--she certainly looks very like you--but I do not
+love her the less for that, whether I am angry or pleased with you.--
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXIII[58-A].
+
+September 22.
+
+I HAVE just written two letters, that are going by other conveyances, and
+which I reckon on your receiving long before this. I therefore merely
+write, because I know I should be disappointed at seeing any one who had
+left you, if you did not send a letter, were it ever so short, to tell me
+why you did not write a longer--and you will want to be told, over and
+over again, that our little Hercules is quite recovered.
+
+Besides looking at me, there are three other things, which delight
+her--to ride in a coach, to look at a scarlet waistcoat, and hear loud
+music--yesterday, at the _fête_, she enjoyed the two latter; but, to
+honour J. J. Rousseau, I intend to give her a sash, the first she has
+ever had round her--and why not?--for I have always been half in love
+with him.
+
+Well, this you will say is trifling--shall I talk about alum or soap?
+There is nothing picturesque in your present pursuits; my imagination
+then rather chuses to ramble back to the barrier with you, or to see you
+coming to meet me, and my basket of grapes.--With what pleasure do I
+recollect your looks and words, when I have been sitting on the window,
+regarding the waving corn!
+
+Believe me, sage sir, you have not sufficient respect for the
+imagination--I could prove to you in a trice that it is the mother of
+sentiment, the great distinction of our nature, the only purifier of the
+passions--animals have a portion of reason, and equal, if not more
+exquisite, senses; but no trace of imagination, or her offspring taste,
+appears in any of their actions. The impulse of the senses, passions, if
+you will, and the conclusions of reason, draw men together; but the
+imagination is the true fire, stolen from heaven, to animate this cold
+creature of clay, producing all those fine sympathies that lead to
+rapture, rendering men social by expanding their hearts, instead of
+leaving them leisure to calculate how many comforts society affords.
+
+If you call these observations romantic, a phrase in this place which
+would be tantamount to nonsensical, I shall be apt to retort, that you
+are embruted by trade, and the vulgar enjoyments of life--Bring me then
+back your barrier-face, or you shall have nothing to say to my
+barrier-girl; and I shall fly from you, to cherish the remembrances that
+will ever be dear to me; for I am yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXIV.
+
+Evening, Sept. 23.
+
+I HAVE been playing and laughing with the little girl so long, that I
+cannot take up my pen to address you without emotion. Pressing her to my
+bosom, she looked so like you (_entre nous_, your best looks, for I do
+not admire your commercial face) every nerve seemed to vibrate to the
+touch, and I began to think that there was something in the assertion of
+man and wife being one--for you seemed to pervade my whole frame,
+quickening the beat of my heart, and lending me the sympathetic tears you
+excited.
+
+Have I any thing more to say to you? No; not for the present--the rest is
+all flown away; and, indulging tenderness for you, I cannot now complain
+of some people here, who have ruffled my temper for two or three days
+past.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Morning.
+
+YESTERDAY B---- sent to me for my packet of letters. He called on me
+before; and I like him better than I did--that is, I have the same
+opinion of his understanding, but I think with you, he has more
+tenderness and real delicacy of feeling with respect to women, than are
+commonly to be met with. His manner too of speaking of his little girl,
+about the age of mine, interested me. I gave him a letter for my sister,
+and requested him to see her.
+
+I have been interrupted. Mr. ----I suppose will write about business.
+Public affairs I do not descant on, except to tell you that they write
+now with great freedom and truth, and this liberty of the press will
+overthrow the Jacobins, I plainly perceive.
+
+I hope you take care of your health. I have got a habit of restlessness
+at night, which arises, I believe, from activity of mind; for, when I am
+alone, that is, not near one to whom I can open my heart, I sink into
+reveries and trains of thinking, which agitate and fatigue me.
+
+This is my third letter; when am I to hear from you? I need not tell you,
+I suppose, that I am now writing with somebody in the room with me, and
+---- is waiting to carry this to Mr. ----'s. I will then kiss the girl
+for you, and bid you adieu.
+
+I desired you, in one of my other letters, to bring back to me your
+barrier-face--or that you should not be loved by my barrier-girl. I know
+that you will love her more and more, for she is a little affectionate,
+intelligent creature, with as much vivacity, I should think, as you could
+wish for.
+
+I was going to tell you of two or three things which displease me here;
+but they are not of sufficient consequence to interrupt pleasing
+sensations. I have received a letter from Mr. ----. I want you to bring
+----with you. Madame S---- is by me, reading a German translation of your
+letters--she desires me to give her love to you, on account of what you
+say of the negroes.
+
+Yours most affectionately,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXV.
+
+Paris, Sept. 28.
+
+I HAVE written to you three or four letters; but different causes have
+prevented my sending them by the persons who promised to take or forward
+them. The inclosed is one I wrote to go by B----; yet, finding that he
+will not arrive, before I hope, and believe, you will have set out on
+your return, I inclose it to you, and shall give it in charge to ----, as
+Mr. ---- is detained, to whom I also gave a letter.
+
+I cannot help being anxious to hear from you; but I shall not harrass you
+with accounts of inquietudes, or of cares that arise from peculiar
+circumstances.--I have had so many little plagues here, that I have
+almost lamented that I left H----. ----, who is at best a most helpless
+creature, is now, on account of her pregnancy, more trouble than use to
+me, so that I still continue to be almost a slave to the child.--She
+indeed rewards me, for she is a sweet little creature; for, setting aside
+a mother's fondness (which, by the bye, is growing on me, her little
+intelligent smiles sinking into my heart), she has an astonishing degree
+of sensibility and observation. The other day by B----'s child, a fine
+one, she looked like a little sprite.--She is all life and motion, and
+her eyes are not the eyes of a fool--I will swear.
+
+I slept at St. Germain's, in the very room (if you have not forgot) in
+which you pressed me very tenderly to your heart.--I did not forget to
+fold my darling to mine, with sensations that are almost too sacred to
+be alluded to.
+
+Adieu, my love! Take care of yourself, if you wish to be the protector of
+your child, and the comfort of her mother.
+
+I have received, for you, letters from --------. I want to hear how that
+affair finishes, though I do not know whether I have most contempt for
+his folly or knavery.
+
+Your own
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXVI.
+
+October 1.
+
+IT is a heartless task to write letters, without knowing whether they
+will ever reach you.--I have given two to ----, who has been a-going,
+a-going, every day, for a week past; and three others, which were written
+in a low-spirited strain, a little querulous or so, I have not been able
+to forward by the opportunities that were mentioned to me. _Tant mieux!_
+you will say, and I will not say nay; for I should be sorry that the
+contents of a letter, when you are so far away, should damp the pleasure
+that the sight of it would afford--judging of your feelings by my own. I
+just now stumbled on one of the kind letters, which you wrote during your
+last absence. You are then a dear affectionate creature, and I will not
+plague you. The letter which you chance to receive, when the absence is
+so long, ought to bring only tears of tenderness, without any bitter
+alloy, into your eyes.
+
+After your return I hope indeed, that you will not be so immersed in
+business, as during the last three or four months past--for even money,
+taking into the account all the future comforts it is to procure, may be
+gained at too dear a rate, if painful impressions are left on the
+mind.--These impressions were much more lively, soon after you went away,
+than at present--for a thousand tender recollections efface the
+melancholy traces they left on my mind--and every emotion is on the same
+side as my reason, which always was on yours.--Separated, it would be
+almost impious to dwell on real or imaginary imperfections of
+character.--I feel that I love you; and, if I cannot be happy with you, I
+will seek it no where else.
+
+My little darling grows every day more dear to me--and she often has a
+kiss, when we are alone together, which I give her for you, with all my
+heart.
+
+I have been interrupted--and must send off my letter. The liberty of the
+press will produce a great effect here--the _cry of blood will not be
+vain_!--Some more monsters will perish--and the Jacobins are
+conquered.--Yet I almost fear the last slap of the tail of the beast.
+
+I have had several trifling teazing inconveniencies here, which I shall
+not now trouble you with a detail of.--I am sending ---- back; her
+pregnancy rendered her useless. The girl I have got has more vivacity,
+which is better for the child.
+
+I long to hear from you.--Bring a copy of ---- and ---- with you.
+
+---- is still here: he is a lost man.--He really loves his wife, and is
+anxious about his children; but his indiscriminate hospitality and social
+feelings have given him an inveterate habit of drinking, that destroys
+his health, as well as renders his person disgusting.--If his wife had
+more sense, or delicacy, she might restrain him: as it is, nothing will
+save him.
+
+Yours most truly and affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXVII.
+
+October 26.
+
+MY dear love, I began to wish so earnestly to hear from you, that the
+sight of your letters occasioned such pleasurable emotions, I was obliged
+to throw them aside till the little girl and I were alone together; and
+this said little girl, our darling, is become a most intelligent little
+creature, and as gay as a lark, and that in the morning too, which I do
+not find quite so convenient. I once told you, that the sensations before
+she was born, and when she is sucking, were pleasant; but they do not
+deserve to be compared to the emotions I feel, when she stops to smile
+upon me, or laughs outright on meeting me unexpectedly in the street, or
+after a short absence. She has now the advantage of having two good
+nurses, and I am at present able to discharge my duty to her, without
+being the slave of it.
+
+I have therefore employed and amused myself since I got rid of ----, and
+am making a progress in the language amongst other things. I have also
+made some new acquaintance. I have almost _charmed_ a judge of the
+tribunal, R----, who, though I should not have thought it possible, has
+humanity, if not _beaucoup d'esprit_. But let me tell you, if you do not
+make haste back, I shall be half in love with the author of the
+_Marseillaise_, who is a handsome man, a little too broad-faced or so,
+and plays sweetly on the violin.
+
+What do you say to this threat?--why, _entre nous_, I like to give way to
+a sprightly vein, when writing to you, that is, when I am pleased with
+you. "The devil," you know, is proverbially said to be "in a good humour,
+when he is pleased." Will you not then be a good boy, and come back
+quickly to play with your girls? but I shall not allow you to love the
+new-comer best.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+My heart longs for your return, my love, and only looks for, and seeks
+happiness with you; yet do not imagine that I childishly wish you to come
+back, before you have arranged things in such a manner, that it will not
+be necessary for you to leave us soon again; or to make exertions which
+injure your constitution.
+
+Yours most truly and tenderly
+
+* * * *
+
+P.S. "You would oblige me by delivering the inclosed to Mr. ----, and
+pray call for an answer.--It is for a person uncomfortably situated.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXVIII.
+
+Dec. 26.
+
+I HAVE been, my love, for some days tormented by fears, that I would not
+allow to assume a form--I had been expecting you daily--and I heard that
+many vessels had been driven on shore during the late gale.--Well, I now
+see your letter--and find that you are safe; I will not regret then that
+your exertions have hitherto been so unavailing.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Be that as it may, return to me when you have arranged the other matters,
+which ---- has been crowding on you. I want to be sure that you are
+safe--and not separated from me by a sea that must be passed. For,
+feeling that I am happier than I ever was, do you wonder at my sometimes
+dreading that fate has not done persecuting me? Come to me, my dearest
+friend, husband, father of my child!--All these fond ties glow at my
+heart at this moment, and dim my eyes.--With you an independence is
+desirable; and it is always within our reach, if affluence escapes
+us--without you the world again appears empty to me. But I am recurring
+to some of the melancholy thoughts that have flitted across my mind for
+some days past, and haunted my dreams.
+
+My little darling is indeed a sweet child; and I am sorry that you are
+not here, to see her little mind unfold itself. You talk of "dalliance;"
+but certainly no lover was ever more attached to his mistress, than she
+is to me. Her eyes follow me every where, and by affection I have the
+most despotic power over her. She is all vivacity or softness--yes; I
+love her more than I thought I should. When I have been hurt at your
+stay, I have embraced her as my only comfort--when pleased with you, for
+looking and laughing like you; nay, I cannot, I find, long be angry with
+you, whilst I am kissing her for resembling you. But there would be no
+end to these details. Fold us both to your heart; for I am truly and
+affectionately
+
+Yours
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXIX.
+
+December 28.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I do, my love, indeed sincerely sympathize with you in all your
+disappointments.--Yet, knowing that you are well, and think of me with
+affection, I only lament other disappointments, because I am sorry that
+you should thus exert yourself in vain, and that you are kept from me.
+
+------, I know, urges you to stay, and is continually branching out into
+new projects, because he has the idle desire to amass a large fortune,
+rather an immense one, merely to have the credit of having made it. But
+we who are governed by other motives, ought not to be led on by him. When
+we meet, we will discuss this subject--You will listen to reason, and it
+has probably occurred to you, that it will be better, in future, to
+pursue some sober plan, which may demand more time, and still enable you
+to arrive at the same end. It appears to me absurd to waste life in
+preparing to live.
+
+Would it not now be possible to arrange your business in such a manner
+as to avoid the inquietudes, of which I have had my share since your
+departure? Is it not possible to enter into business, as an employment
+necessary to keep the faculties awake, and (to sink a little in the
+expressions) the pot boiling, without suffering what must ever be
+considered as a secondary object, to engross the mind, and drive
+sentiment and affection out of the heart?
+
+I am in a hurry to give this letter to the person who has promised to
+forward it with ------'s. I wish then to counteract, in some measure,
+what he has doubtless recommended most warmly.
+
+Stay, my friend, whilst it is _absolutely_ necessary.--I will give you no
+tenderer name, though it glows at my heart, unless you come the moment
+the settling the _present_ objects permit.--_I do not consent_ to your
+taking any other journey--or the little woman and I will be off, the Lord
+knows where. But, as I had rather owe every thing to your affection, and,
+I may add, to your reason, (for this immoderate desire of wealth, which
+makes ------ so eager to have you remain, is contrary to your principles
+of action), I will not importune you.--I will only tell you, that I long
+to see you--and, being at peace with you, I shall be hurt, rather than
+made angry, by delays.--Having suffered so much in life, do not be
+surprised if I sometimes, when left to myself, grow gloomy, and suppose
+that it was all a dream, and that my happiness is not to last. I say
+happiness, because remembrance retrenches all the dark shades of the
+picture.
+
+My little one begins to show her teeth, and use her legs--She wants you
+to bear your part in the nursing business, for I am fatigued with dancing
+her, and yet she is not satisfied--she wants you to thank her mother for
+taking such care of her, as you only can.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXX.
+
+December 29.
+
+THOUGH I suppose you have later intelligence, yet, as ------ has just
+informed me that he has an opportunity of sending immediately to you, I
+take advantage of it to inclose you
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+How I hate this crooked business! This intercourse with the world, which
+obliges one to see the worst side of human nature! Why cannot you be
+content with the object you had first in view, when you entered into this
+wearisome labyrinth?--I know very well that you have imperceptibly been
+drawn on; yet why does one project, successful or abortive, only give
+place to two others? Is it not sufficient to avoid poverty?--I am
+contented to do my part; and, even here, sufficient to escape from
+wretchedness is not difficult to obtain. And, let me tell you, I have my
+project also--and, if you do not soon return, the little girl and I will
+take care of ourselves; we will not accept any of your cold
+kindness--your distant civilities--no; not we.
+
+This is but half jesting, for I am really tormented by the desire which
+------ manifests to have you remain where you are.--Yet why do I talk to
+you?--If he can persuade you--let him!--for, if you are not happier with
+me, and your own wishes do not make you throw aside these eternal
+projects, I am above using any arguments, though reason as well as
+affection seems to offer them--if our affection be mutual, they will
+occur to you--and you will act accordingly.
+
+Since my arrival here, I have found the German lady, of whom you have
+heard me speak. Her first child died in the month; but she has another,
+about the age of my ------, a fine little creature. They are still but
+contriving to live----earning their daily bread--yet, though they are
+but just above poverty, I envy them.--She is a tender, affectionate
+mother--fatigued even by her attention.--However she has an affectionate
+husband in her turn, to render her care light, and to share her pleasure.
+
+I will own to you that, feeling extreme tenderness for my little girl, I
+grow sad very often when I am playing with her, that you are not here, to
+observe with me how her mind unfolds, and her little heart becomes
+attached!--These appear to me to be true pleasures--and still you suffer
+them to escape you, in search of what we may never enjoy.--It is your own
+maxim to "live in the present moment."--_If you do_--stay, for God's
+sake; but tell me the truth--if not, tell me when I may expect to see
+you, and let me not be always vainly looking for you, till I grow sick at
+heart.
+
+Adieu! I am a little hurt.--I must take my darling to my bosom to comfort
+me.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXI.
+
+December 30.
+
+SHOULD you receive three or four of the letters at once which I have
+written lately, do not think of Sir John Brute, for I do not mean to wife
+you. I only take advantage of every occasion, that one out of three of my
+epistles may reach your hands, and inform you that I am not of ------'s
+opinion, who talks till he makes me angry, of the necessity of your
+staying two or three months longer. I do not like this life of continual
+inquietude--and, _entre nous_, I am determined to try to earn some money
+here myself, in order to convince you that, if you chuse to run about the
+world to get a fortune, it is for yourself--for the little girl and I
+will live without your assistance, unless you are with us. I may be
+termed proud--Be it so--but I will never abandon certain principles of
+action.
+
+The common run of men have such an ignoble way of thinking, that, if they
+debauch their hearts, and prostitute their persons, following perhaps a
+gust of inebriation, they suppose the wife, slave rather, whom they
+maintain, has no right to complain, and ought to receive the sultan,
+whenever he deigns to return, with open arms, though his have been
+polluted by half an hundred promiscuous amours during his absence.
+
+I consider fidelity and constancy as two distinct things; yet the former
+is necessary, to give life to the other--and such a degree of respect do
+I think due to myself, that, if only probity, which is a good thing in
+its place, brings you back, never return!--for, if a wandering of the
+heart, or even a caprice of the imagination detains you--there is an end
+of all my hopes of happiness--I could not forgive it, if I would.
+
+I have gotten into a melancholy mood, you perceive. You know my opinion
+of men in general; you know that I think them systematic tyrants, and
+that it is the rarest thing in the world, to meet with a man with
+sufficient delicacy of feeling to govern desire. When I am thus sad, I
+lament that my little darling, fondly as I doat on her, is a girl.--I am
+sorry to have a tie to a world that for me is ever sown with thorns.
+
+You will call this an ill-humoured letter, when, in fact, it is the
+strongest proof of affection I can give, to dread to lose you. ------ has
+taken such pains to convince me that you must and ought to stay, that it
+has inconceivably depressed my spirits--You have always known my
+opinion--I have ever declared, that two people, who mean to live
+together, ought not to be long separated.--If certain things are more
+necessary to you than me--search for them--Say but one word, and you
+shall never hear of me more.--If not--for God's sake, let us struggle
+with poverty--with any evil, but these continual inquietudes of business,
+which I have been told were to last but a few months, though every day
+the end appears more distant! This is the first letter in this strain
+that I have determined to forward to you; the rest lie by, because I was
+unwilling to give you pain, and I should not now write, if I did not
+think that there would be no conclusion to the schemes, which demand, as
+I am told, your presence.
+
+* * * *[91-A]
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXII.
+
+January 9.
+
+I JUST now received one of your hasty _notes_; for business so entirely
+occupies you, that you have not time, or sufficient command of thought,
+to write letters. Beware! you seem to be got into a whirl of projects and
+schemes, which are drawing you into a gulph, that, if it do not absorb
+your happiness, will infallibly destroy mine.
+
+Fatigued during my youth by the most arduous struggles, not only to
+obtain independence, but to render myself useful, not merely pleasure,
+for which I had the most lively taste, I mean the simple pleasures that
+flow from passion and affection, escaped me, but the most melancholy
+views of life were impressed by a disappointed heart on my mind. Since I
+knew you, I have been endeavouring to go back to my former nature, and
+have allowed some time to glide away, winged with the delight which only
+spontaneous enjoyment can give.--Why have you so soon dissolved the
+charm?
+
+I am really unable to bear the continual inquietude which your and
+------'s never-ending plans produce. This you may term want of
+firmness--but you are mistaken--I have still sufficient firmness to
+pursue my principle of action. The present misery, I cannot find a softer
+word to do justice to my feelings, appears to me unnecessary--and
+therefore I have not firmness to support it as you may think I ought. I
+should have been content, and still wish, to retire with you to a
+farm--My God! any thing, but these continual anxieties--any thing but
+commerce, which debases the mind, and roots out affection from the heart.
+
+I do not mean to complain of subordinate inconveniences----yet I will
+simply observe, that, led to expect you every week, I did not make the
+arrangements required by the present circumstances, to procure the
+necessaries of life. In order to have them, a servant, for that purpose
+only, is indispensible--The want of wood, has made me catch the most
+violent cold I ever had; and my head is so disturbed by continual
+coughing, that I am unable to write without stopping frequently to
+recollect myself.--This however is one of the common evils which must be
+borne with----bodily pain does not touch the heart, though it fatigues
+the spirits.
+
+Still as you talk of your return, even in February, doubtingly, I have
+determined, the moment the weather changes, to wean my child.--It is too
+soon for her to begin to divide sorrow!--And as one has well said,
+"despair is a freeman," we will go and seek our fortune together.
+
+This is not a caprice of the moment--for your absence has given new
+weight to some conclusions, that I was very reluctantly forming before
+you left me.--I do not chuse to be a secondary object.--If your feelings
+were in unison with mine, you would not sacrifice so much to visionary
+prospects of future advantage.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXIII.
+
+Jan. 15.
+
+I WAS just going to begin my letter with the fag end of a song, which
+would only have told you, what I may as well say simply, that it is
+pleasant to forgive those we love. I have received your two letters,
+dated the 26th and 28th of December, and my anger died away. You can
+scarcely conceive the effect some of your letters have produced on me.
+After longing to hear from you during a tedious interval of suspense, I
+have seen a superscription written by you.--Promising myself pleasure,
+and feeling emotion, I have laid it by me, till the person who brought
+it, left the room--when, behold! on opening it, I have found only half a
+dozen hasty lines, that have damped all the rising affection of my soul.
+
+Well, now for business--
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+My animal is well; I have not yet taught her to eat, but nature is doing
+the business. I gave her a crust to assist the cutting of her teeth; and
+now she has two, she makes good use of them to gnaw a crust, biscuit, &c.
+You would laugh to see her; she is just like a little squirrel; she will
+guard a crust for two hours; and, after fixing her eye on an object for
+some time, dart on it with an aim as sure as a bird of prey--nothing can
+equal her life and spirits. I suffer from a cold; but it does not affect
+her. Adieu! do not forget to love us--and come soon to tell us that you
+do.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXIV.
+
+Jan. 30.
+
+FROM the purport of your last letters, I would suppose that this will
+scarcely reach you; and I have already written so many letters, that you
+have either not received, or neglected to acknowledge, I do not find it
+pleasant, or rather I have no inclination, to go over the same ground
+again. If you have received them, and are still detained by new projects,
+it is useless for me to say any more on the subject. I have done with it
+for ever--yet I ought to remind you that your pecuniary interest suffers
+by your absence.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+For my part, my head is turned giddy, by only hearing of plans to make
+money, and my contemptuous feelings have sometimes burst out. I therefore
+was glad that a violent cold gave me a pretext to stay at home, lest I
+should have uttered unseasonable truths.
+
+My child is well, and the spring will perhaps restore me to myself.--I
+have endured many inconveniences this winter, which should I be ashamed
+to mention, if they had been unavoidable. "The secondary pleasures of
+life," you say, "are very necessary to my comfort:" it may be so; but I
+have ever considered them as secondary. If therefore you accuse me of
+wanting the resolution necessary to bear the _common_[100-A] evils of
+life; I should answer, that I have not fashioned my mind to sustain them,
+because I would avoid them, cost what it would----
+
+Adieu!
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXV.
+
+February 9.
+
+THE melancholy presentiment has for some time hung on my spirits, that we
+were parted for ever; and the letters I received this day, by Mr. ----,
+convince me that it was not without foundation. You allude to some other
+letters, which I suppose have miscarried; for most of those I have got,
+were only a few hasty lines, calculated to wound the tenderness the sight
+of the superscriptions excited.
+
+I mean not however to complain; yet so many feelings are struggling for
+utterance, and agitating a heart almost bursting with anguish, that I
+find it very difficult to write with any degree of coherence.
+
+You left me indisposed, though you have taken no notice of it; and the
+most fatiguing journey I ever had, contributed to continue it. However, I
+recovered my health; but a neglected cold, and continual inquietude
+during the last two months, have reduced me to a state of weakness I
+never before experienced. Those who did not know that the canker-worm was
+at work at the core, cautioned me about suckling my child too long.--God
+preserve this poor child, and render her happier than her mother!
+
+But I am wandering from my subject: indeed my head turns giddy, when I
+think that all the confidence I have had in the affection of others is
+come to this.
+
+I did not expect this blow from you. I have done my duty to you and my
+child; and if I am not to have any return of affection to reward me, I
+have the sad consolation of knowing that I deserved a better fate. My
+soul is weary--I am sick at heart; and, but for this little darling, I
+would cease to care about a life, which is now stripped of every charm.
+
+You see how stupid I am, uttering declamation, when I meant simply to
+tell you, that I consider your requesting me to come to you, as merely
+dictated by honour.--Indeed, I scarcely understand you.--You request me
+to come, and then tell me, that you have not given up all thoughts of
+returning to this place.
+
+When I determined to live with you, I was only governed by affection.--I
+would share poverty with you, but I turn with affright from the sea of
+trouble on which you are entering.--I have certain principles of action:
+I know what I look for to found my happiness on.--It is not money.--With
+you I wished for sufficient to procure the comforts of life--as it is,
+less will do.--I can still exert myself to obtain the necessaries of life
+for my child, and she does not want more at present.--I have two or three
+plans in my head to earn our subsistence; for do not suppose that,
+neglected by you, I will lie under obligations of a pecuniary kind to
+you!--No; I would sooner submit to menial service.--I wanted the support
+of your affection--that gone, all is over!--I did not think, when I
+complained of ----'s contemptible avidity to accumulate money, that he
+would have dragged you into his schemes.
+
+I cannot write.--I inclose a fragment of a letter, written soon after
+your departure, and another which tenderness made me keep back when it
+was written.--You will see then the sentiments of a calmer, though not a
+more determined, moment.--Do not insult me by saying, that "our being
+together is paramount to every other consideration!" Were it, you would
+not be running after a bubble, at the expence of my peace of mind.
+
+Perhaps this is the last letter you will ever receive from me.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXVI.
+
+Feb. 10.
+
+YOU talk of "permanent views and future comfort"--not for me, for I am
+dead to hope. The inquietudes of the last winter have finished the
+business, and my heart is not only broken, but my constitution destroyed.
+I conceive myself in a galloping consumption, and the continual anxiety I
+feel at the thought of leaving my child, feeds the fever that nightly
+devours me. It is on her account that I again write to you, to conjure
+you, by all that you hold sacred, to leave her here with the German lady
+you may have heard me mention! She has a child of the same age, and they
+may be brought up together, as I wish her to be brought up. I shall
+write more fully on the subject. To facilitate this, I shall give up my
+present lodgings, and go into the same house. I can live much cheaper
+there, which is now become an object. I have had 3000 livres from ----,
+and I shall take one more, to pay my servant's wages, &c. and then I
+shall endeavour to procure what I want by my own exertions. I shall
+entirely give up the acquaintance of the Americans.
+
+---- and I have not been on good terms a long time. Yesterday he very
+unmanlily exulted over me, on account of your determination to stay. I
+had provoked it, it is true, by some asperities against commerce, which
+have dropped from me, when we have argued about the propriety of your
+remaining where you are; and it is no matter, I have drunk too deep of
+the bitter cup to care about trifles.
+
+When you first entered into these plans, you bounded your views to the
+gaining of a thousand pounds. It was sufficient to have procured a farm
+in America, which would have been an independence. You find now that you
+did not know yourself, and that a certain situation in life is more
+necessary to you than you imagined--more necessary than an uncorrupted
+heart--For a year or two, you may procure yourself what you call
+pleasure; eating, drinking, and women; but, in the solitude of declining
+life, I shall be remembered with regret--I was going to say with remorse,
+but checked my pen.
+
+As I have never concealed the nature of my connection with you, your
+reputation will not suffer. I shall never have a confident: I am content
+with the approbation of my own mind; and, if there be a searcher of
+hearts, mine will not be despised. Reading what you have written relative
+to the desertion of women, I have often wondered how theory and practice
+could be so different, till I recollected, that the sentiments of
+passion, and the resolves of reason, are very distinct. As to my sisters,
+as you are so continually hurried with business, you need not write to
+them--I shall, when my mind is calmer. God bless you! Adieu!
+
+* * * *
+
+This has been such a period of barbarity and misery, I ought not to
+complain of having my share. I wish one moment that I had never heard of
+the cruelties that have been practised here, and the next envy the
+mothers who have been killed with their children. Surely I had suffered
+enough in life, not to be cursed with a fondness, that burns up the vital
+stream I am imparting. You will think me mad: I would I were so, that I
+could forget my misery--so that my head or heart would be still.----
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXVII.
+
+Feb. 19.
+
+WHEN I first received your letter, putting off your return to an
+indefinite time, I felt so hurt, that I know not what I wrote. I am now
+calmer, though it was not the kind of wound over which time has the
+quickest effect; on the contrary, the more I think, the sadder I grow.
+Society fatigues me inexpressibly--So much so, that finding fault with
+every one, I have only reason enough, to discover that the fault is in
+myself. My child alone interests me, and, but for her, I should not take
+any pains to recover my health.
+
+As it is, I shall wean her, and try if by that step (to which I feel a
+repugnance, for it is my only solace) I can get rid of my cough.
+Physicians talk much of the danger attending any complaint on the lungs,
+after a woman has suckled for some months. They lay a stress also on the
+necessity of keeping the mind tranquil--and, my God! how has mine been
+harrassed! But whilst the caprices of other women are gratified, "the
+wind of heaven not suffered to visit them too rudely," I have not found
+a guardian angel, in heaven or on earth, to ward off sorrow or care from
+my bosom.
+
+What sacrifices have you not made for a woman you did not respect!--But I
+will not go over this ground--I want to tell you that I do not understand
+you. You say that you have not given up all thoughts of returning
+here--and I know that it will be necessary--nay, is. I cannot explain
+myself; but if you have not lost your memory, you will easily divine my
+meaning. What! is our life then only to be made up of separations? and am
+I only to return to a country, that has not merely lost all charms for
+me, but for which I feel a repugnance that almost amounts to horror, only
+to be left there a prey to it!
+
+Why is it so necessary that I should return?--brought up here, my girl
+would be freer. Indeed, expecting you to join us, I had formed some plans
+of usefulness that have now vanished with my hopes of happiness.
+
+In the bitterness of my heart, I could complain with reason, that I am
+left here dependent on a man, whose avidity to acquire a fortune has
+rendered him callous to every sentiment connected with social or
+affectionate emotions.--With a brutal insensibility, he cannot help
+displaying the pleasure your determination to stay gives him, in spite of
+the effect it is visible it has had on me.
+
+Till I can earn money, I shall endeavour to borrow some, for I want to
+avoid asking him continually for the sum necessary to maintain me.--Do
+not mistake me, I have never been refused.--Yet I have gone half a dozen
+times to the house to ask for it, and come away without speaking----you
+must guess why--Besides, I wish to avoid hearing of the eternal projects
+to which you have sacrificed my peace--not remembering--but I will be
+silent for ever.----
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXVIII.
+
+April 7.
+
+HERE I am at H----, on the wing towards you, and I write now, only to
+tell you, that you may expect me in the course of three or four days;
+for I shall not attempt to give vent to the different emotions which
+agitate my heart--You may term a feeling, which appears to me to be a
+degree of delicacy that naturally arises from sensibility, pride--Still I
+cannot indulge the very affectionate tenderness which glows in my bosom,
+without trembling, till I see, by your eyes, that it is mutual.
+
+I sit, lost in thought, looking at the sea--and tears rush into my eyes,
+when I find that I am cherishing any fond expectations.--I have indeed
+been so unhappy this winter, I find it as difficult to acquire fresh
+hopes, as to regain tranquillity.--Enough of this--lie still, foolish
+heart!--But for the little girl, I could almost wish that it should cease
+to beat, to be no more alive to the anguish of disappointment.
+
+Sweet little creature! I deprived myself of my only pleasure, when I
+weaned her, about ten days ago.--I am however glad I conquered my
+repugnance.--It was necessary it should be done soon, and I did not wish
+to embitter the renewal of your acquaintance with her, by putting it off
+till we met.--It was a painful exertion to me, and I thought it best to
+throw this inquietude with the rest, into the sack that I would fain
+throw over my shoulder.--I wished to endure it alone, in short--Yet,
+after sending her to sleep in the next room for three or four nights, you
+cannot think with what joy I took her back again to sleep in my bosom!
+
+I suppose I shall find you, when I arrive, for I do not see any necessity
+for your coming to me.--Pray inform Mr. ------, that I have his little
+friend with me.--My wishing to oblige him, made me put myself to some
+inconvenience----and delay my departure; which was irksome to me, who
+have not quite as much philosophy, I would not for the world say
+indifference, as you. God bless you!
+
+Yours truly,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXIX.
+
+Brighthelmstone, Saturday, April 11.
+
+HERE we are, my love, and mean to set out early in the morning; and, if I
+can find you, I hope to dine with you to-morrow.--I shall drive to
+------'s hotel, where ------ tells me you have been--and, if you have
+left it, I hope you will take care to be there to receive us.
+
+I have brought with me Mr. ----'s little friend, and a girl whom I like
+to take care of our little darling--not on the way, for that fell to my
+share.--But why do I write about trifles?--or any thing?--Are we not to
+meet soon?--What does your heart say!
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+I have weaned my ------, and she is now eating away at the white bread.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XL.
+
+London, Friday, May 22.
+
+I HAVE just received your affectionate letter, and am distressed to think
+that I have added to your embarrassments at this troublesome juncture,
+when the exertion of all the faculties of your mind appears to be
+necessary, to extricate you out of your pecuniary difficulties. I suppose
+it was something relative to the circumstance you have mentioned, which
+made ------ request to see me to-day, to _converse about a matter of
+great importance_. Be that as it may, his letter (such is the state of my
+spirits) inconceivably alarmed me, and rendered the last night as
+distressing, as the two former had been.
+
+I have laboured to calm my mind since you left me--Still I find that
+tranquillity is not to be obtained by exertion; it is a feeling so
+different from the resignation of despair!--I am however no longer angry
+with you--nor will I ever utter another complaint--there are arguments
+which convince the reason, whilst they carry death to the heart.--We have
+had too many cruel explanations, that not only cloud every future
+prospect; but embitter the remembrances which alone give life to
+affection.--Let the subject never be revived!
+
+It seems to me that I have not only lost the hope, but the power of being
+happy.--Every emotion is now sharpened by anguish.--My soul has been
+shook, and my tone of feelings destroyed.--I have gone out--and sought
+for dissipation, if not amusement, merely to fatigue still more, I find,
+my irritable nerves----
+
+My friend--my dear friend--examine yourself well--I am out of the
+question; for, alas! I am nothing--and discover what you wish to do--what
+will render you most comfortable--or, to be more explicit--whether you
+desire to live with me, or part for ever? When you can once ascertain it,
+tell me frankly, I conjure you!--for, believe me, I have very
+involuntarily interrupted your peace.
+
+I shall expect you to dinner on Monday, and will endeavour to assume a
+cheerful face to greet you--at any rate I will avoid conversations,
+which only tend to harrass your feelings, because I am most
+affectionately yours,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLI.
+
+Wednesday.
+
+I INCLOSE you the letter, which you desired me to forward, and I am
+tempted very laconically to wish you a good morning--not because I am
+angry, or have nothing to say; but to keep down a wounded spirit.--I
+shall make every effort to calm my mind--yet a strong conviction seems to
+whirl round in the very centre of my brain, which, like the fiat of
+fate, emphatically assures me, that grief has a firm hold of my heart.
+
+God bless you!
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLII.
+
+--, Wednesday, Two o'Clock.
+
+WE arrived here about an hour ago. I am extremely fatigued with the
+child, who would not rest quiet with any body but me, during the
+night--and now we are here in a comfortless, damp room, in a sort of a
+tomb-like house. This however I shall quickly remedy, for, when I have
+finished this letter, (which I must do immediately, because the post goes
+out early), I shall sally forth, and enquire about a vessel and an inn.
+
+I will not distress you by talking of the depression of my spirits, or
+the struggle I had to keep alive my dying heart.--It is even now too full
+to allow me to write with composure.--*****,--dear *****, --am I always
+to be tossed about thus?--shall I never find an asylum to rest
+_contented_ in? How can you love to fly about continually--dropping down,
+as it were, in a new world--cold and strange!--every other day? Why do
+you not attach those tender emotions round the idea of home, which even
+now dim my eyes?--This alone is affection--every thing else is only
+humanity, electrified by sympathy.
+
+I will write to you again to-morrow, when I know how long I am to be
+detained--and hope to get a letter quickly from you, to cheer yours
+sincerely and affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+------ is playing near me in high spirits. She was so pleased with the
+noise of the mail-horn, she has been continually imitating it.----Adieu!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLIII.
+
+Thursday.
+
+A LADY has just sent to offer to take me to ------. I have then only a
+moment to exclaim against the vague manner in which people give
+information    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+But why talk of inconveniences, which are in fact trifling, when compared
+with the sinking of the heart I have felt! I did not intend to touch this
+painful string--God bless you!
+
+Yours truly,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLIV.
+
+Friday, June 12.
+
+I HAVE just received yours dated the 9th, which I suppose was a mistake,
+for it could scarcely have loitered so long on the road. The general
+observations which apply to the state of your own mind, appear to me
+just, as far as they go; and I shall always consider it as one of the
+most serious misfortunes of my life, that I did not meet you, before
+satiety had rendered your senses so fastidious, as almost to close up
+every tender avenue of sentiment and affection that leads to your
+sympathetic heart. You have a heart, my friend, yet, hurried away by the
+impetuosity of inferior feelings, you have sought in vulgar excesses,
+for that gratification which only the heart can bestow.
+
+The common run of men, I know, with strong health and gross appetites,
+must have variety to banish _ennui_, because the imagination never lends
+its magic wand, to convert appetite into love, cemented by according
+reason.--Ah! my friend, you know not the ineffable delight, the exquisite
+pleasure, which arises from a unison of affection and desire, when the
+whole soul and senses are abandoned to a lively imagination, that renders
+every emotion delicate and rapturous. Yes; these are emotions, over which
+satiety has no power, and the recollection of which, even disappointment
+cannot disenchant; but they do not exist without self-denial. These
+emotions, more or less strong, appear to me to be the distinctive
+characteristic of genius, the foundation of taste, and of that exquisite
+relish for the beauties of nature, of which the common herd of eaters and
+drinkers and _child-begeters_, certainly have no idea. You will smile at
+an observation that has just occurred to me:--I consider those minds as
+the most strong and original, whose imagination acts as the stimulus to
+their senses.
+
+Well! you will ask, what is the result of all this reasoning? Why I
+cannot help thinking that it is possible for you, having great strength
+of mind, to return to nature, and regain a sanity of constitution, and
+purity of feeling--which would open your heart to me.--I would fain rest
+there!
+
+Yet, convinced more than ever of the sincerity and tenderness of my
+attachment to you, the involuntary hopes, which a determination to live
+has revived, are not sufficiently strong to dissipate the cloud, that
+despair has spread over futurity. I have looked at the sea, and at my
+child, hardly daring to own to myself the secret wish, that it might
+become our tomb; and that the heart, still so alive to anguish, might
+there be quieted by death. At this moment ten thousand complicated
+sentiments press for utterance, weigh on my heart, and obscure my sight.
+
+Are we ever to meet again? and will you endeavour to render that meeting
+happier than the last? Will you endeavour to restrain your caprices, in
+order to give vigour to affection, and to give play to the checked
+sentiments that nature intended should expand your heart? I cannot
+indeed, without agony, think of your bosom's being continually
+contaminated; and bitter are the tears which exhaust my eyes, when I
+recollect why my child and I are forced to stray from the asylum, in
+which, after so many storms, I had hoped to rest, smiling at angry
+fate.--These are not common sorrows; nor can you perhaps conceive, how
+much active fortitude it requires to labour perpetually to blunt the
+shafts of disappointment.
+
+Examine now yourself, and ascertain whether you can live in
+something-like a settled stile. Let our confidence in future be
+unbounded; consider whether you find it necessary to sacrifice me to what
+you term "the zest of life;" and, when you have once a clear view of your
+own motives, of your own incentive to action, do not deceive me!
+
+The train of thoughts which the writing of this epistle awoke, makes me
+so wretched, that I must take a walk, to rouse and calm my mind. But
+first, let me tell you, that, if you really wish to promote my happiness,
+you will endeavour to give me as much as you can of yourself. You have
+great mental energy; and your judgment seems to me so just, that it is
+only the dupe of your inclination in discussing one subject.
+
+The post does not go out to-day. To-morrow I may write more tranquilly. I
+cannot yet say when the vessel will sail in which I have determined to
+depart.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Saturday Morning.
+
+Your second letter reached me about an hour ago. You were certainly
+wrong, in supposing that I did not mention you with respect; though,
+without my being conscious of it, some sparks of resentment may have
+animated the gloom of despair--Yes; with less affection, I should have
+been more respectful. However the regard which I have for you, is so
+unequivocal to myself, I imagine that it must be sufficiently obvious to
+every body else. Besides, the only letter I intended for the public eye
+was to ----, and that I destroyed from delicacy before you saw them,
+because it was only written (of course warmly in your praise) to prevent
+any odium being thrown on you[133-A].
+
+I am harrassed by your embarrassments, and shall certainly use all my
+efforts, to make the business terminate to your satisfaction in which I
+am engaged.
+
+My friend--my dearest friend--I feel my fate united to yours by the most
+sacred principles of my soul, and the yearns of--yes, I will say it--a
+true, unsophisticated heart.
+
+Yours most truly
+
+* * * *
+
+If the wind be fair, the captain talks of sailing on Monday; but I am
+afraid I shall be detained some days longer. At any rate, continue to
+write, (I want this support) till you are sure I am where I cannot expect
+a letter; and, if any should arrive after my departure, a gentleman (not
+Mr. ----'s friend, I promise you) from whom I have received great
+civilities, will send them after me.
+
+Do write by every occasion! I am anxious to hear how your affairs go on;
+and, still more, to be convinced that you are not separating yourself
+from us. For my little darling is calling papa, and adding her parrot
+word--Come, Come! And will you not come, and let us exert ourselves?--I
+shall recover all my energy, when I am convinced that my exertions will
+draw us more closely together. One more adieu!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLV.
+
+Sunday, June 14.
+
+I RATHER expected to hear from you to-day--I wish you would not fail to
+write to me for a little time, because I am not quite well--Whether I
+have any good sleep or not, I wake in the morning in violent fits of
+trembling--and, in spite of all my efforts, the child--every
+thing--fatigues me, in which I seek for solace or amusement.
+
+Mr. ---- forced on me a letter to a physician of this place; it was
+fortunate, for I should otherwise have had some difficulty to obtain the
+necessary information. His wife is a pretty woman (I can admire, you
+know, a pretty woman, when I am alone) and he an intelligent and rather
+interesting man.--They have behaved to me with great hospitality; and
+poor ------ was never so happy in her life, as amongst their young brood.
+
+They took me in their carriage to ------, and I ran over my favourite
+walks, with a vivacity that would have astonished you.--The town did not
+please me quite so well as formerly--It appeared so diminutive; and, when
+I found that many of the inhabitants had lived in the same houses ever
+since I left it, I could not help wondering how they could thus have
+vegetated, whilst I was running over a world of sorrow, snatching at
+pleasure, and throwing off prejudices. The place where I at present am,
+is much improved; but it is astonishing what strides aristocracy and
+fanaticism have made, since I resided in this country.
+
+The wind does not appear inclined to change, so I am still forced to
+linger--When do you think that you shall be able to set out for France? I
+do not entirely like the aspect of your affairs, and still less your
+connections on either side of the water. Often do I sigh, when I think of
+your entanglements in business, and your extreme restlessness of
+mind.--Even now I am almost afraid to ask you, whether the pleasure of
+being free, does not over-balance the pain you felt at parting with me?
+Sometimes I indulge the hope that you will feel me necessary to you--or
+why should we meet again?--but, the moment after, despair damps my rising
+spirits, aggravated by the emotions of tenderness, which ought to soften
+the cares of life.----God bless you!
+
+Yours sincerely and affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLVI.
+
+June 15.
+
+I WANT to know how you have settled with respect to ------. In short, be
+very particular in your account of all your affairs--let our confidence,
+my dear, be unbounded.--The last time we were separated, was a separation
+indeed on your part--Now you have acted more ingenuously, let the most
+affectionate interchange of sentiments fill up the aching void of
+disappointment. I almost dread that your plans will prove abortive--yet
+should the most unlucky turn send you home to us, convinced that a true
+friend is a treasure, I should not much mind having to struggle with the
+world again. Accuse me not of pride--yet sometimes, when nature has
+opened my heart to its author, I have wondered that you did not set a
+higher value on my heart.
+
+Receive a kiss from ------, I was going to add, if you will not take one
+from me, and believe me yours
+
+Sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+The wind still continues in the same quarter.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLVII.
+
+Tuesday Morning.
+
+THE captain has just sent to inform me, that I must be on board in the
+course of a few hours.--I wished to have stayed till to-morrow. It would
+have been a comfort to me to have received another letter from
+you--Should one arrive, it will be sent after me.
+
+My spirits are agitated, I scarcely know why----The quitting England
+seems to be a fresh parting.--Surely you will not forget me.--A thousand
+weak forebodings assault my soul, and the state of my health renders me
+sensible to every thing. It is surprising that in London, in a continual
+conflict of mind, I was still growing better--whilst here, bowed down by
+the despotic hand of fate, forced into resignation by despair, I seem to
+be fading away--perishing beneath a cruel blight, that withers up all my
+faculties.
+
+The child is perfectly well. My hand seems unwilling to add adieu! I know
+not why this inexpressible sadness has taken possession of me.--It is not
+a presentiment of ill. Yet, having been so perpetually the sport of
+disappointment,--having a heart that has been as it were a mark for
+misery, I dread to meet wretchedness in some new shape.--Well, let it
+come--I care not!--what have I to dread, who have so little to hope for!
+God bless you--I am most affectionately and sincerely yours
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLVIII.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+I WAS hurried on board yesterday about three o'clock, the wind having
+changed. But before evening it veered round to the old point; and here we
+are, in the midst of mists and water, only taking advantage of the tide
+to advance a few miles.
+
+You will scarcely suppose that I left the town with reluctance--yet it
+was even so--for I wished to receive another letter from you, and I felt
+pain at parting, for ever perhaps, from the amiable family, who had
+treated me with so much hospitality and kindness. They will probably send
+me your letter, if it arrives this morning; for here we are likely to
+remain, I am afraid to think how long.
+
+The vessel is very commodious, and the captain a civil, open-hearted kind
+of man. There being no other passengers, I have the cabin to myself,
+which is pleasant; and I have brought a few books with me to beguile
+weariness; but I seem inclined, rather to employ the dead moments of
+suspence in writing some effusions, than in reading.
+
+What are you about? How are your affairs going on? It may be a long time
+before you answer these questions. My dear friend, my heart sinks within
+me!--Why am I forced thus to struggle continually with my affections and
+feelings?--Ah! why are those affections and feelings the source of so
+much misery, when they seem to have been given to vivify my heart, and
+extend my usefulness! But I must not dwell on this subject.--Will you not
+endeavour to cherish all the affection you can for me? What am I
+saying?--Rather forget me, if you can--if other gratifications are dearer
+to you.--How is every remembrance of mine embittered by disappointment?
+What a world is this!--They only seem happy, who never look beyond
+sensual or artificial enjoyments.--Adieu!
+
+------ begins to play with the cabin-boy, and is as gay as a lark.--I
+will labour to be tranquil; and am in every mood,
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLIX.
+
+Thursday.
+
+HERE I am still--and I have just received your letter of Monday by the
+pilot, who promised to bring it to me, if we were detained, as he
+expected, by the wind.--It is indeed wearisome to be thus tossed about
+without going forward.--I have a violent head-ache--yet I am obliged to
+take care of the child, who is a little tormented by her teeth, because
+------ is unable to do any thing, she is rendered so sick by the motion
+of the ship, as we ride at anchor.
+
+These are however trifling inconveniences, compared with anguish of
+mind--compared with the sinking of a broken heart.--To tell you the
+truth, I never suffered in my life so much from depression of
+spirits--from despair.--I do not sleep--or, if I close my eyes, it is to
+have the most terrifying dreams, in which I often meet you with different
+casts of countenance.
+
+I will not, my dear ------, torment you by dwelling on my sufferings--and
+will use all my efforts to calm my mind, instead of deadening it--at
+present it is most painfully active. I find I am not equal to these
+continual struggles--yet your letter this morning has afforded me some
+comfort--and I will try to revive hope. One thing let me tell you--when
+we meet again--surely we are to meet!--it must be to part no more. I mean
+not to have seas between us--it is more than I can support.
+
+The pilot is hurrying me--God bless you.
+
+In spite of the commodiousness of the vessel, every thing here would
+disgust my senses, had I nothing else to think of--"When the mind's free,
+the body's delicate;"--mine has been too much hurt to regard trifles.
+
+Yours most truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER L.
+
+Saturday.
+
+THIS is the fifth dreary day I have been imprisoned by the wind, with
+every outward object to disgust the senses, and unable to banish the
+remembrances that sadden my heart.
+
+How am I altered by disappointment!--When going to ----, ten years ago,
+the elasticity of my mind was sufficient to ward off weariness--and the
+imagination still could dip her brush in the rainbow of fancy, and sketch
+futurity in smiling colours. Now I am going towards the North in search
+of sunbeams!--Will any ever warm this desolated heart? All nature seems
+to frown--or rather mourn with me.--Every thing is cold--cold as my
+expectations! Before I left the shore, tormented, as I now am, by these
+North east _chillers_, I could not help exclaiming--Give me, gracious
+Heaven! at least, genial weather, if I am never to meet the genial
+affection that still warms this agitated bosom--compelling life to linger
+there.
+
+I am now going on shore with the captain, though the weather be rough,
+to seek for milk, &c. at a little village, and to take a walk--after
+which I hope to sleep--for, confined here, surrounded by disagreeable
+smells, I have lost the little appetite I had; and I lie awake, till
+thinking almost drives me to the brink of madness--only to the brink, for
+I never forget, even in the feverish slumbers I sometimes fall into, the
+misery I am labouring to blunt the the sense of, by every exertion in my
+power.
+
+Poor ------ still continues sick, and ------ grows weary when the weather
+will not allow her to remain on deck.
+
+I hope this will be the last letter I shall write from England to
+you--are you not tired of this lingering adieu?
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LI.
+
+Sunday Morning.
+
+THE captain last night, after I had written my letter to you intended to
+be left at a little village, offered to go to ---- to pass to-day. We had
+a troublesome sail--and now I must hurry on board again, for the wind has
+changed.
+
+I half expected to find a letter from you here. Had you written one
+haphazard, it would have been kind and considerate--you might have known,
+had you thought, that the wind would not permit me to depart. These are
+attentions, more grateful to the heart than offers of service--But why
+do I foolishly continue to look for them?
+
+Adieu! adieu! My friend--your friendship is very cold--you see I am
+hurt.--God bless you! I may perhaps be, some time or other, independent
+in every sense of the word--Ah! there is but one sense of it of
+consequence. I will break or bend this weak heart--yet even now it is
+full.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+The child is well; I did not leave her on board.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LII.
+
+June 27, Saturday.
+
+I ARRIVED in ------ this afternoon, after vainly attempting to land at
+----. I have now but a moment, before the post goes out, to inform you we
+have got here; though not without considerable difficulty, for we were
+set ashore in a boat above twenty miles below.
+
+What I suffered in the vessel I will not now descant upon--nor mention
+the pleasure I received from the sight of the rocky coast.--This morning
+however, walking to join the carriage that was to transport us to this
+place, I fell, without any previous warning, senseless on the rocks--and
+how I escaped with life I can scarcely guess. I was in a stupour for a
+quarter of an hour; the suffusion of blood at last restored me to my
+senses--the contusion is great, and my brain confused. The child is well.
+
+Twenty miles ride in the rain, after my accident, has sufficiently
+deranged me--and here I could not get a fire to warm me, or any thing
+warm to eat; the inns are mere stables--I must nevertheless go to bed.
+For God's sake, let me hear from you immediately, my friend! I am not
+well and yet you see I cannot die.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LIII.
+
+June 29.
+
+I WROTE to you by the last post, to inform you of my arrival; and I
+believe I alluded to the extreme fatigue I endured on ship-board, owing
+to ------'s illness, and the roughness of the weather--I likewise
+mentioned to you my fall, the effects of which I still feel, though I do
+not think it will have any serious consequences.
+
+------ will go with me, if I find it necessary to go to ------. The inns
+here are so bad, I was forced to accept of an apartment in his house. I
+am overwhelmed with civilities on all sides, and fatigued with the
+endeavours to amuse me, from which I cannot escape.
+
+My friend--my friend, I am not well--a deadly weight of sorrow lies
+heavily on my heart. I am again tossed on the troubled billows of life;
+and obliged to cope with difficulties, without being buoyed up by the
+hopes that alone render them bearable. "How flat, dull, and
+unprofitable," appears to me all the bustle into which I see people here
+so eagerly enter! I long every night to go to bed, to hide my melancholy
+face in my pillow; but there is a canker-worm in my bosom that never
+sleeps.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LIV.
+
+July 1.
+
+I LABOUR in vain to calm my mind--my soul has been overwhelmed by sorrow
+and disappointment. Every thing fatigues me--this is a life that cannot
+last long. It is you who must determine with respect to futurity--and,
+when you have, I will act accordingly--I mean, we must either resolve to
+live together, or part for ever, I cannot bear these continual
+struggles--But I wish you to examine carefully your own heart and mind;
+and, if you perceive the least chance of being happier without me than
+with me, or if your inclination leans capriciously to that side, do not
+dissemble; but tell me frankly that you will never see me more. I will
+then adopt the plan I mentioned to you--for we must either live together,
+or I will be entirely independent.
+
+My heart is so oppressed, I cannot write with precision--You know however
+that what I so imperfectly express, are not the crude sentiments of the
+moment--You can only contribute to my comfort (it is the consolation I am
+in need of) by being with me--and, if the tenderest friendship is of any
+value, why will you not look to me for a degree of satisfaction that
+heartless affections cannot bestow?
+
+Tell me then, will you determine to meet me at Basle?--I shall, I should
+imagine, be at ------ before the close of August; and, after you settle
+your affairs at Paris, could we not meet there?
+
+God bless you!
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+Poor ------ has suffered during the journey with her teeth.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LV.
+
+July 3.
+
+THERE was a gloominess diffused through your last letter, the impression
+of which still rests on my mind--though, recollecting how quickly you
+throw off the forcible feelings of the moment, I flatter myself it has
+long since given place to your usual cheerfulness.
+
+Believe me (and my eyes fill with tears of tenderness as I assure you)
+there is nothing I would not endure in the way of privation, rather than
+disturb your tranquillity.--If I am fated to be unhappy, I will labour to
+hide my sorrows in my own bosom; and you shall always find me a faithful,
+affectionate friend.
+
+I grow more and more attached to my little girl--and I cherish this
+affection without fear, because it must be a long time before it can
+become bitterness of soul.--She is an interesting creature.--On
+ship-board, how often as I gazed at the sea, have I longed to bury my
+troubled bosom in the less troubled deep; asserting with Brutus, "that
+the virtue I had followed too far, was merely an empty name!" and
+nothing but the sight of her--her playful smiles, which seemed to cling
+and twine round my heart--could have stopped me.
+
+What peculiar misery has fallen to my share! To act up to my principles,
+I have laid the strictest restraint on my very thoughts--yes; not to
+sully the delicacy of my feelings, I have reined in my imagination; and
+started with affright from every sensation, (I allude to ----) that
+stealing with balmy sweetness into my soul, led me to scent from afar the
+fragrance of reviving nature.
+
+My friend, I have dearly paid for one conviction.--Love, in some minds,
+is an affair of sentiment, arising from the same delicacy of perception
+(or taste) as renders them alive to the beauties of nature, poetry, &c,
+alive to the charms of those evanescent graces that are, as it were,
+impalpable--they must be felt, they cannot be described.
+
+Love is a want of my heart. I have examined myself lately with more care
+than formerly, and find, that to deaden is not to calm the mind--Aiming
+at tranquillity, I have almost destroyed all the energy of my
+soul--almost rooted out what renders it estimable--Yes, I have damped
+that enthusiasm of character, which converts the grossest materials into
+a fuel, that imperceptibly feeds hopes, which aspire above common
+enjoyment. Despair, since the birth of my child, has rendered me
+stupid--soul and body seemed to be fading away before the withering touch
+of disappointment.
+
+I am now endeavouring to recover myself--and such is the elasticity of my
+constitution, and the purity of the atmosphere here, that health unsought
+for, begins to reanimate my countenance.
+
+I have the sincerest esteem and affection for you--but the desire of
+regaining peace, (do you understand me?) has made me forget the respect
+due to my own emotions--sacred emotions, that are the sure harbingers of
+the delights I was formed to enjoy--and shall enjoy, for nothing can
+extinguish the heavenly spark.
+
+Still, when we meet again, I will not torment you, I promise you. I blush
+when I recollect my former conduct--and will not in future confound
+myself with the beings whom I feel to be my inferiors.--I will listen to
+delicacy, or pride.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LVI.
+
+July 4.
+
+I HOPE to hear from you by to-morrow's mail. My dearest friend! I cannot
+tear my affections from you--and, though every remembrance stings me to
+the soul, I think of you, till I make allowance for the very defects of
+character, that have given such a cruel stab to my peace.
+
+Still however I am more alive, than you have seen me for a long, long
+time. I have a degree of vivacity, even in my grief, which is preferable
+to the benumbing stupour that, for the last year, has frozen up all my
+faculties.--Perhaps this change is more owing to returning health, than
+to the vigour of my reason--for, in spite of sadness (and surely I have
+had my share), the purity of this air, and the being continually out in
+it, for I sleep in the country every night, has made an alteration in my
+appearance that really surprises me.--The rosy fingers of health already
+streak my cheeks--and I have seen a _physical_ life in my eyes, after I
+have been climbing the rocks, that resembled the fond, credulous hopes of
+youth.
+
+With what a cruel sigh have I recollected that I had forgotten to
+hope!--Reason, or rather experience, does not thus cruelly damp poor
+------'s pleasures; she plays all day in the garden with ------'s
+children, and makes friends for herself.
+
+Do not tell me, that you are happier without us--Will you not come to us
+in Switzerland? Ah, why do not you love us with more sentiment?--why are
+you a creature of such sympathy, that the warmth of your feelings, or
+rather quickness of your senses, hardens your heart? It is my misfortune,
+that my imagination is perpetually shading your defects, and lending you
+charms, whilst the grossness of your senses makes you (call me not vain)
+overlook graces in me, that only dignity of mind, and the sensibility of
+an expanded heart can give.--God bless you! Adieu.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LVII.
+
+July 7.
+
+I COULD not help feeling extremely mortified last post, at not receiving
+a letter from you. My being at ------was but a chance, and you might have
+hazarded it; and would a year ago.
+
+I shall not however complain--There are misfortunes so great, as to
+silence the usual expressions of sorrow--Believe me, there is such a
+thing as a broken heart! There are characters whose very energy preys
+upon them; and who, ever inclined to cherish by reflection some passion,
+cannot rest satisfied with the common comforts of life. I have
+endeavoured to fly from myself, and launched into all the dissipation
+possible here, only to feel keener anguish, when alone with my child.
+
+Still, could any thing please me--had not disappointment cut me off from
+life, this romantic country, these fine evenings, would interest me.--My
+God! can any thing? and am I ever to feel alive only to painful
+sensations?--But it cannot--it shall not last long.
+
+The post is again arrived; I have sent to seek for letters, only to be
+wounded to the soul by a negative.--My brain seems on fire, I must go
+into the air.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LVIII.
+
+July 14.
+
+I AM now on my journey to ------. I felt more at leaving my child, than I
+thought I should--and, whilst at night I imagined every instant that I
+heard the half-formed sounds of her voice,--I asked myself how I could
+think of parting with her for ever, of leaving her thus helpless?
+
+Poor lamb! It may run very well in a tale, that "God will temper the
+winds to the shorn lamb!" but how can I expect that she will be shielded,
+when my naked bosom has had to brave continually the pitiless storm?
+Yes; I could add, with poor Lear--What is the war of elements to the
+pangs of disappointed affection, and the horror arising from a discovery
+of a breach of confidence, that snaps every social tie!
+
+All is not right somewhere!--When you first knew me, I was not thus lost.
+I could still confide--for I opened my heart to you--of this only comfort
+you have deprived me, whilst my happiness, you tell me, was your first
+object. Strange want of judgment!
+
+I will not complain; but, from the soundness of your understanding, I am
+convinced, if you give yourself leave to reflect, you will also feel,
+that your conduct to me, so far from being generous, has not been
+just.--I mean not to allude to factitious principles of morality; but to
+the simple basis of all rectitude.--However I did not intend to
+argue--Your not writing is cruel--and my reason is perhaps disturbed by
+constant wretchedness.
+
+Poor ------ would fain have accompanied me, out of tenderness; for my
+fainting, or rather convulsion, when I landed, and my sudden changes of
+countenance since, have alarmed her so much, that she is perpetually
+afraid of some accident--But it would have injured the child this warm
+season, as she is cutting her teeth.
+
+I hear not of your having written to me at ----. Very well! Act as you
+please--there is nothing I fear or care for! When I see whether I can, or
+cannot obtain the money I am come here about, I will not trouble you with
+letters to which you do not reply.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LIX.
+
+July 18.
+
+I AM here in ----, separated from my child--and here I must remain a
+month at least, or I might as well never have come.    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I have begun -------- which will, I hope, discharge all my obligations of
+a pecuniary kind.--I am lowered in my own eyes, on account of my not
+having done it sooner.
+
+I shall make no further comments on your silence. God bless you!
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LX.
+
+July 30.
+
+I HAVE just received two of your letters, dated the 26th and 30th of
+June; and you must have received several from me, informing you of my
+detention, and how much I was hurt by your silence.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Write to me then, my friend, and write explicitly. I have suffered, God
+knows, since I left you. Ah! you have never felt this kind of sickness of
+heart!--My mind however is at present painfully active, and the sympathy
+I feel almost rises to agony. But this is not a subject of complaint, it
+has afforded me pleasure,--and reflected pleasure is all I have to hope
+for--if a spark of hope be yet alive in my forlorn bosom.
+
+I will try to write with a degree of composure. I wish for us to live
+together, because I want you to acquire an habitual tenderness for my
+poor girl. I cannot bear to think of leaving her alone in the world, or
+that she should only be protected by your sense of duty. Next to
+preserving her, my most earnest wish is not to disturb your peace. I have
+nothing to expect, and little to fear, in life--There are wounds that can
+never be healed--but they may be allowed to fester in silence without
+wincing.
+
+When we meet again, you shall be convinced that I have more resolution
+than you give me credit for. I will not torment you. If I am destined
+always to be disappointed and unhappy, I will conceal the anguish I
+cannot dissipate; and the tightened cord of life or reason will at last
+snap, and set me free.
+
+Yes; I shall be happy--This heart is worthy of the bliss its feelings
+anticipate--and I cannot even persuade myself, wretched as they have made
+me, that my principles and sentiments are not founded in nature and
+truth. But to have done with these subjects.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I have been seriously employed in this way since I came to ----; yet I
+never was so much in the air.--I walk, I ride on horseback--row, bathe,
+and even sleep in the fields; my health is consequently improved. The
+child, ------informs me, is well. I long to be with her.
+
+Write to me immediately--were I only to think of myself, I could wish you
+to return to me, poor, with the simplicity of character, part of which
+you seem lately to have lost, that first attached to you.
+
+Yours most affectionately
+
+* * * *  * * * * *
+
+I have been subscribing other letters--so I mechanically did the same to
+yours.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXI.
+
+August 5.
+
+EMPLOYMENT and exercise have been of great service to me; and I have
+entirely recovered the strength and activity I lost during the time of my
+nursing. I have seldom been in better health; and my mind, though
+trembling to the touch of anguish, is calmer--yet still the same.--I
+have, it is true, enjoyed some tranquillity, and more happiness here,
+than for a long--long time past.--(I say happiness, for I can give no
+other appellation to the exquisite delight this wild country and fine
+summer have afforded me.)--Still, on examining my heart, I find that it
+is so constituted, I cannot live without some particular affection--I am
+afraid not without a passion--and I feel the want of it more in society,
+than in solitude--
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Writing to you, whenever an affectionate epithet occurs--my eyes fill
+with tears, and my trembling hand stops--you may then depend on my
+resolution, when with you. If I am doomed to be unhappy, I will confine
+my anguish in my own bosom--tenderness, rather than passion, has made me
+sometimes overlook delicacy--the same tenderness will in future restrain
+me. God bless you!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXII.
+
+August 7.
+
+AIR, exercise, and bathing, have restored me to health, braced my
+muscles, and covered my ribs, even whilst I have recovered my former
+activity.--I cannot tell you that my mind is calm, though I have snatched
+some moments of exquisite delight, wandering through the woods, and
+resting on the rocks.
+
+This state of suspense, my friend, is intolerable; we must determine on
+something--and soon;--we must meet shortly, or part for ever. I am
+sensible that I acted foolishly--but I was wretched--when we were
+together--Expecting too much, I let the pleasure I might have caught,
+slip from me. I cannot live with you--I ought not--if you form another
+attachment. But I promise you, mine shall not be intruded on you. Little
+reason have I to expect a shadow of happiness, after the cruel
+disappointments that have rent my heart; but that of my child seems to
+depend on our being together. Still I do not wish you to sacrifice a
+chance of enjoyment for an uncertain good. I feel a conviction, that I
+can provide for her, and it shall be my object--if we are indeed to part
+to meet no more. Her affection must not be divided. She must be a comfort
+to me--if I am to have no other--and only know me as her support.--I feel
+that I cannot endure the anguish of corresponding with you--if we are
+only to correspond.--No; if you seek for happiness elsewhere, my letters
+shall not interrupt your repose. I will be dead to you. I cannot express
+to you what pain it gives me to write about an eternal separation.--You
+must determine--examine yourself--But, for God's sake! spare me the
+anxiety of uncertainty!--I may sink under the trial; but I will not
+complain.
+
+Adieu! If I had any thing more to say to you, it is all flown, and
+absorbed by the most tormenting apprehensions, yet I scarcely know what
+new form of misery I have to dread.
+
+I ought to beg your pardon for having sometimes written peevishly; but
+you will impute it to affection, if you understand any thing of the heart
+of
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXIII.
+
+August 9.
+
+FIVE of your letters have been sent after me from ----. One, dated the
+14th of July, was written in a style which I may have merited, but did
+not expect from you. However this is not a time to reply to it, except to
+assure you that you shall not be tormented with any more complaints. I am
+disgusted with myself for having so long importuned you with my
+affection.----
+
+My child is very well. We shall soon meet, to part no more, I hope--I
+mean, I and my girl.--I shall wait with some degree of anxiety till I am
+informed how your affairs terminate.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXIV.
+
+August 26.
+
+I ARRIVED here last night, and with the most exquisite delight, once more
+pressed my babe to my heart. We shall part no more. You perhaps cannot
+conceive the pleasure it gave me, to see her run about, and play alone.
+Her increasing intelligence attaches me more and more to her. I have
+promised her that I will fulfil my duty to her; and nothing in future
+shall make me forget it. I will also exert myself to obtain an
+independence for her; but I will not be too anxious on this head.
+
+I have already told you, that I have recovered my health. Vigour, and
+even vivacity of mind, have returned with a renovated constitution. As
+for peace, we will not talk of it. I was not made, perhaps, to enjoy the
+calm contentment so termed.--
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+You tell me that my letters torture you; I will not describe the effect
+yours have on me. I received three this morning, the last dated the 7th
+of this month. I mean not to give vent to the emotions they
+produced.--Certainly you are right; our minds are not congenial. I have
+lived in an ideal world, and fostered sentiments that you do not
+comprehend--or you would not treat me thus. I am not, I will not be,
+merely an object of compassion--a clog, however light, to teize you.
+Forget that I exist: I will never remind you. Something emphatical
+whispers me to put an end to these struggles. Be free--I will not
+torment, when I cannot please. I can take care of my child; you need not
+continually tell me that our fortune is inseparable, _that you will try
+to cherish tenderness_ for me. Do no violence to yourself! When we are
+separated, our interest, since you give so much weight to pecuniary
+considerations, will be entirely divided. I want not protection without
+affection; and support I need not, whilst my faculties are undisturbed.
+I had a dislike to living in England; but painful feelings must give way
+to superior considerations. I may not be able to acquire the sum
+necessary to maintain my child and self elsewhere. It is too late to go
+to Switzerland. I shall not remain at ----, living expensively. But be
+not alarmed! I shall not force myself on you any more.
+
+Adieu! I am agitated--my whole frame is convulsed--my lips tremble, as if
+shook by cold, though fire seems to be circulating in my veins.
+
+God bless you.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXV.
+
+September 6.
+
+I RECEIVED just now your letter of the 20th. I had written you a letter
+last night, into which imperceptibly slipt some of my bitterness of soul.
+I will copy the part relative to business. I am not sufficiently vain to
+imagine that I can, for more than a moment, cloud your enjoyment of
+life--to prevent even that, you had better never hear from me--and repose
+on the idea that I am happy.
+
+Gracious God! It is impossible for me to stifle something like
+resentment, when I receive fresh proofs of your indifference. What I
+have suffered this last year, is not to be forgotten! I have not that
+happy substitute for wisdom, insensibility--and the lively sympathies
+which bind me to my fellow-creatures, are all of a painful kind.--They
+are the agonies of a broken heart--pleasure and I have shaken hands.
+
+I see here nothing but heaps of ruins, and only converse with people
+immersed in trade and sensuality.
+
+I am weary of travelling--yet seem to have no home--no resting place to
+look to.--I am strangely cast off.--How often, passing through the rocks,
+I have thought, "But for this child, I would lay my head on one of them,
+and never open my eyes again!" With a heart feelingly alive to all the
+affections of my nature--I have never met with one, softer than the stone
+that I would fain take for my last pillow. I once thought I had, but it
+was all a delusion. I meet with families continually, who are bound
+together by affection or principle--and, when I am conscious that I have
+fulfilled the duties of my station, almost to a forgetfulness of myself,
+I am ready to demand, in a murmuring tone, of Heaven, "Why am I thus
+abandoned?"
+
+You say now   --   --   --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I do not understand you. It is necessary for you to write more
+explicitly--and determine on some mode of conduct.--I cannot endure this
+suspense--Decide--Do you fear to strike another blow? We live together,
+or eternally part!--I shall not write to you again, till I receive an
+answer to this. I must compose my tortured soul, before I write on
+indifferent subjects.   --   --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I do not know whether I write intelligibly, for my head is
+disturbed.--But this you ought to pardon--for it is with difficulty
+frequently that I make out what you mean to say--You write, I suppose, at
+Mr. ----'s after dinner, when your head is not the clearest--and as for
+your heart, if you have one, I see nothing like the dictates of
+affection, unless a glimpse when you mention, the child.--Adieu!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXVI.
+
+September 25.
+
+I HAVE just finished a letter, to be given in charge to captain ------.
+In that I complained of your silence, and expressed my surprise that
+three mails should have arrived without bringing a line for me. Since I
+closed it, I hear of another, and still no letter.--I am labouring to
+write calmly--this silence is a refinement on cruelty. Had captain ------
+remained a few days longer, I would have returned with him to England.
+What have I to do here? I have repeatedly written to you fully. Do you
+do the same--and quickly. Do not leave me in suspense. I have not
+deserved this of you. I cannot write, my mind is so distressed. Adieu!
+
+* * * *
+
+
+END VOL. III.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[4-A] The child is in a subsequent letter called the "barrier girl,"
+probably from a supposition that she owed her existence to this
+interview.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+[7-A] This and the thirteen following letters appear to have been written
+during a separation of several months; the date, Paris.
+
+[27-A] Some further letters, written during the remainder of the week, in
+a similar strain to the preceding, appear to have been destroyed by the
+person to whom they were addressed.
+
+[47-A] The child spoken of in some preceding letters, had now been born a
+considerable time.
+
+[50-A] She means, "the latter more than the former."
+
+EDITOR.
+
+[58-A] This is the first of a series of letters written during a
+separation of many months, to which no cordial meeting ever succeeded.
+They were sent from Paris, and bear the address of London.
+
+[91-A] The person to whom the letters are addressed, was about this time
+at Ramsgate, on his return, as he professed, to Paris, when he was
+recalled, as it should seem, to London, by the further pressure of
+business now accumulated upon him.
+
+[100-A] This probably alludes to some expression of the person to whom
+the letters are addressed, in which he treated as common evils, things
+upon which the letter writer was disposed to bestow a different
+appellation.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+[133-A] This passage refers to letters written under a purpose of
+suicide, and not intended to be opened till after the catastrophe.
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. IV.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+
+LETTERS
+
+AND
+
+MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. II.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+                                                       Page
+Letters                                                   1
+Letter on the Present Character of the French Nation     39
+Fragment of Letters on the Management of Infants         55
+Letters to Mr. Johnson                                   61
+Extract of the Cave of Fancy, a Tale                     99
+On Poetry and our Relish for the Beauties of Nature     159
+Hints                                                   179
+
+
+
+
+ERRATA.
+
+
+Page 10, line 8, _for_ I write you, _read_ I write to you.
+---- 20, -- 9, _read_ bring them to ----.
+---- 146, -- 2 from the bottom, after over, insert a comma.
+
+
+
+
+LETTERS.
+
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXVII.
+
+September 27.
+
+WHEN you receive this, I shall either have landed, or be hovering on the
+British coast--your letter of the 18th decided me.
+
+By what criterion of principle or affection, you term my questions
+extraordinary and unnecessary, I cannot determine.--You desire me to
+decide--I had decided. You must have had long ago two letters of mine,
+from ------, to the same purport, to consider.--In these, God knows!
+there was but too much affection, and the agonies of a distracted mind
+were but too faithfully pourtrayed!--What more then had I to say?--The
+negative was to come from you.--You had perpetually recurred to your
+promise of meeting me in the autumn--Was it extraordinary that I should
+demand a yes, or no?--Your letter is written with extreme harshness,
+coldness I am accustomed to, in it I find not a trace of the tenderness
+of humanity, much less of friendship.--I only see a desire to heave a
+load off your shoulders.
+
+I am above disputing about words.--It matters not in what terms you
+decide.
+
+The tremendous power who formed this heart, must have foreseen that, in a
+world in which self-interest, in various shapes, is the principal mobile,
+I had little chance of escaping misery.--To the fiat of fate I submit.--I
+am content to be wretched; but I will not be contemptible.--Of me you
+have no cause to complain, but for having had too much regard for
+you--for having expected a degree of permanent happiness, when you only
+sought for a momentary gratification.
+
+I am strangely deficient in sagacity.--Uniting myself to you, your
+tenderness seemed to make me amends for all my former misfortunes.--On
+this tenderness and affection with what confidence did I rest!--but I
+leaned on a spear, that has pierced me to the heart.--You have thrown off
+a faithful friend, to pursue the caprices of the moment.--We certainly
+are differently organized; for even now, when conviction has been stamped
+on my soul by sorrow, I can scarcely believe it possible. It depends at
+present on you, whether you will see me or not.--I shall take no step,
+till I see or hear from you.
+
+Preparing myself for the worst--I have determined, if your next letter be
+like the last, to write to Mr. ------to procure me an obscure lodging,
+and not to inform any body of my arrival.--There I will endeavour in a
+few months to obtain the sum necessary to take me to France--from you I
+will not receive any more.--I am not yet sufficiently humbled to depend
+on your beneficence.
+
+Some people, whom my unhappiness has interested, though they know not
+the extent of it, will assist me to attain the object I have in view, the
+independence of my child. Should a peace take place, ready money will go
+a great way in France--and I will borrow a sum, which my industry _shall_
+enable me to pay at my leisure, to purchase a small estate for my
+girl.--The assistance I shall find necessary to complete her education, I
+can get at an easy rate at Paris--I can introduce her to such society as
+she will like--and thus, securing for her all the chance for happiness,
+which depends on me, I shall die in peace, persuaded that the felicity
+which has hitherto cheated my expectation, will not always elude my
+grasp. No poor tempest-tossed mariner ever more earnestly longed to
+arrive at his port.
+
+* * * *
+
+I shall not come up in the vessel all the way, because I have no place to
+go to. Captain ------ will inform you where I am. It is needless to add,
+that I am not in a state of mind to bear suspense--and that I wish to see
+you, though it be for the last time.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXVIII.
+
+Sunday, October 4.
+
+I WROTE to you by the packet, to inform you, that your letter of the 18th
+of last month, had determined me to set out with captain ------; but, as
+we sailed very quick, I take it for granted, that you have not yet
+received it.
+
+You say, I must decide for myself.--I had decided, that it was most for
+the interest of my little girl, and for my own comfort, little as I
+expect, for us to live together; and I even thought that you would be
+glad, some years hence, when the tumult of business was over, to repose
+in the society of an affectionate friend, and mark the progress of our
+interesting child, whilst endeavouring to be of use in the circle you at
+last resolved to rest in; for you cannot run about for ever.
+
+From the tenour of your last letter however, I am led to imagine, that
+you have formed some new attachment.--If it be so, let me earnestly
+request you to see me once more, and immediately. This is the only proof
+I require of the friendship you profess for me. I will then decide,
+since you boggle about a mere form.
+
+I am labouring to write with calmness--but the extreme anguish I feel, at
+landing without having any friend to receive me, and even to be conscious
+that the friend whom I most wish to see, will feel a disagreeable
+sensation at being informed of my arrival, does not come under the
+description of common misery. Every emotion yields to an overwhelming
+flood of sorrow--and the playfulness of my child distresses me.--On her
+account, I wished to remain a few days here, comfortless as is my
+situation.--Besides, I did not wish to surprise you. You have told me,
+that you would make any sacrifice to promote my happiness--and, even in
+your last unkind letter, you talk of the ties which bind you to me and
+my child.--Tell me, that you wish it, and I will cut this Gordian knot.
+
+I now most earnestly intreat you to write to me, without fail, by the
+return of the post. Direct your letter to be left at the post-office, and
+tell me whether you will come to me here, or where you will meet me. I
+can receive your letter on Wednesday morning.
+
+Do not keep me in suspense.--I expect nothing from you, or any human
+being: my die is cast!--I have fortitude enough to determine to do my
+duty; yet I cannot raise my depressed spirits, or calm my trembling
+heart.--That being who moulded it thus, knows that I am unable to tear up
+by the roots the propensity to affection which has been the torment of my
+life--but life will have an end!
+
+Should you come here (a few months ago I could not have doubted it) you
+will find me at ------. If you prefer meeting me on the road, tell me
+where.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXIX.
+
+I WRITE you now on my knees; imploring you to send my child and the maid
+with ----, to Paris, to be consigned to the care of Madame ----, rue
+----, section de ----. Should they be removed, ---- can give their
+direction.
+
+Let the maid have all my clothes, without distinction.
+
+Pray pay the cook her wages, and do not mention the confession which I
+forced from her--a little sooner or later is of no consequence. Nothing
+but my extreme stupidity could have rendered me blind so long. Yet,
+whilst you assured me that you had no attachment, I thought we might
+still have lived together.
+
+I shall make no comments on your conduct; or any appeal to the world. Let
+my wrongs sleep with me! Soon, very soon shall I be at peace. When you
+receive this, my burning head will be cold.
+
+I would encounter a thousand deaths, rather than a night like the last.
+Your treatment has thrown my mind into a state of chaos; yet I am serene.
+I go to find comfort, and my only fear is, that my poor body will be
+insulted by an endeavour to recal my hated existence. But I shall plunge
+into the Thames where there is the least chance of my being snatched from
+the death I seek.
+
+God bless you! May you never know by experience what you have made me
+endure. Should your sensibility ever awake, remorse will find its way to
+your heart; and, in the midst of business and sensual pleasure, I shall
+appear before you, the victim of your deviation from rectitude.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXX.
+
+Sunday Morning.
+
+I HAVE only to lament, that, when the bitterness of death was past, I was
+inhumanly brought back to life and misery. But a fixed determination is
+not to be baffled by disappointment; nor will I allow that to be a
+frantic attempt, which was one of the calmest acts of reason. In this
+respect, I am only accountable to myself. Did I care for what is termed
+reputation, it is by other circumstances that I should be dishonoured.
+
+You say, "that you know not how to extricate ourselves out of the
+wretchedness into which we have been plunged." You are extricated long
+since.--But I forbear to comment.----If I am condemned to live longer, it
+is a living death.
+
+It appears to me, that you lay much more stress on delicacy, than on
+principle; for I am unable to discover what sentiment of delicacy would
+have been violated, by your visiting a wretched friend--if indeed you
+have any friendship for me.--But since your new attachment is the only
+thing sacred in your eyes, I am silent--Be happy! My complaints shall
+never more damp your enjoyment--perhaps I am mistaken in supposing that
+even my death could, for more than a moment.--This is what you call
+magnanimity--It is happy for yourself, that you possess this quality in
+the highest degree.
+
+Your continually asserting, that you will do all in your power to
+contribute to my comfort (when you only allude to pecuniary assistance),
+appears to me a flagrant breach of delicacy.--I want not such vulgar
+comfort, nor will I accept it. I never wanted but your heart--That gone,
+you have nothing more to give. Had I only poverty to fear, I should not
+shrink from life.--Forgive me then, if I say, that I shall consider any
+direct or indirect attempt to supply my necessities, as an insult which I
+have not merited--and as rather done out of tenderness for your own
+reputation, than for me. Do not mistake me; I do not think that you value
+money (therefore I will not accept what you do not care for) though I do
+much less, because certain privations are not painful to me. When I am
+dead, respect for yourself will make you take care of the child.
+
+I write with difficulty--probably I shall never write to you
+again.--Adieu!
+
+God bless you!
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXI.
+
+Monday Morning.
+
+I AM compelled at last to say that you treat me ungenerously. I agree
+with you, that--    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+But let the obliquity now fall on me.--I fear neither poverty nor infamy.
+I am unequal to the task of writing--and explanations are not necessary.--
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+My child may have to blush for her mother's want of prudence--and may
+lament that the rectitude of my heart made me above vulgar precautions;
+but she shall not despise me for meanness.--You are now perfectly
+free.--God bless you.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXIII.
+
+Saturday Night.
+
+I HAVE been hurt by indirect enquiries, which appear to me not to be
+dictated by any tenderness to me.--You ask "If I am well or
+tranquil?"--They who think me so, must want a heart to estimate my
+feelings by.--I chuse then to be the organ of my own sentiments.
+
+I must tell you, that I am very much mortified by your continually
+offering me pecuniary assistance--and, considering your going to the new
+house, as an open avowal that you abandon me, let me tell you that I
+will sooner perish than receive any thing from you--and I say this at the
+moment when I am disappointed in my first attempt to obtain a temporary
+supply. But this even pleases me; an accumulation of disappointments and
+misfortunes seems to suit the habit of my mind.--
+
+Have but a little patience, and I will remove myself where it will not be
+necessary for you to talk--of course, not to think of me. But let me see,
+written by yourself--for I will not receive it through any other
+medium--that the affair is finished.--It is an insult to me to suppose,
+that I can be reconciled, or recover my spirits; but, if you hear nothing
+of me, it will be the same thing to you.
+
+* * * *
+
+Even your seeing me, has been to oblige other people, and not to sooth my
+distracted mind.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXIV.
+
+Thursday Afternoon.
+
+MR. ------ having forgot to desire you to send the things of mine which
+were left at the house, I have to request you to let ------ bring them
+onto ------.
+
+I shall go this evening to the lodging; so you need not be restrained
+from coming here to transact your business.--And, whatever I may think,
+and feel--you need not fear that I shall publicly complain--No! If I
+have any criterion to judge of right and wrong, I have been most
+ungenerously treated: but, wishing now only to hide myself, I shall be
+silent as the grave in which I long to forget myself. I shall protect and
+provide for my child.--I only mean by this to say, that you having
+nothing to fear from my desperation.
+
+Farewel.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXV.
+
+London, November 27.
+
+
+THE letter, without an address, which you put up with the letters you
+returned, did not meet my eyes till just now.--I had thrown the letters
+aside--I did not wish to look over a register of sorrow.
+
+My not having seen it, will account for my having written to you with
+anger--under the impression your departure, without even a line left for
+me, made on me, even after your late conduct, which could not lead me to
+expect much attention to my sufferings.
+
+In fact, "the decided conduct, which appeared to me so unfeeling," has
+almost overturned my reason; my mind is injured--I scarcely know where I
+am, or what I do.--The grief I cannot conquer (for some cruel
+recollections never quit me, banishing almost every other) I labour to
+conceal in total solitude.--My life therefore is but an exercise of
+fortitude, continually on the stretch--and hope never gleams in this
+tomb, where I am buried alive.
+
+But I meant to reason with you, and not to complain.--You tell me, "that
+I shall judge more coolly of your mode of acting, some time hence." But
+is it not possible that _passion_ clouds your reason, as much as it does
+mine?--and ought you not to doubt, whether those principles are so
+"exalted," as you term them, which only lead to your own gratification?
+In other words, whether it be just to have no principle of action, but
+that of following your inclination, trampling on the affection you have
+fostered, and the expectations you have excited?
+
+My affection for you is rooted in my heart.--I know you are not what you
+now seem--nor will you always act, or feel, as you now do, though I may
+never be comforted by the change.--Even at Paris, my image will haunt
+you.--You will see my pale face--and sometimes the tears of anguish will
+drop on your heart, which you have forced from mine.
+
+I cannot write. I thought I could quickly have refuted all your
+_ingenious_ arguments; but my head is confused.--Right or wrong, I am
+miserable!
+
+It seems to me, that my conduct has always been governed by the strictest
+principles of justice and truth.--Yet, how wretched have my social
+feelings, and delicacy of sentiment rendered me!--I have loved with my
+whole soul, only to discover that I had no chance of a return--and that
+existence is a burthen without it.
+
+I do not perfectly understand you.--If, by the offer of your friendship,
+you still only mean pecuniary support--I must again reject it.--Trifling
+are the ills of poverty in the scale of my misfortunes.--God bless you!
+
+* * * *
+
+I have been treated ungenerously--if I understand what is
+generosity.----You seem to me only to have been anxious to shake me
+off--regardless whether you dashed me to atoms by the fall.--In truth I
+have been rudely handled. _Do you judge coolly_, and I trust you will
+not continue to call those capricious feelings "the most refined," which
+would undermine not only the most sacred principles, but the affections
+which unite mankind.----You would render mothers unnatural--and there
+would be no such thing as a father!--If your theory of morals is the most
+"exalted," it is certainly the most easy.--It does not require much
+magnanimity, to determine to please ourselves for the moment, let others
+suffer what they will!
+
+Excuse me for again tormenting you, my heart thirsts for justice from
+you--and whilst I recollect that you approved Miss ------'s conduct--I am
+convinced you will not always justify your own.
+
+Beware of the deceptions of passion! It will not always banish from your
+mind, that you have acted ignobly--and condescended to subterfuge to
+gloss over the conduct you could not excuse.--Do truth and principle
+require such sacrifices?
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXVI.
+
+London, December 8.
+
+HAVING just been informed that ------ is to return immediately to Paris,
+I would not miss a sure opportunity of writing, because I am not certain
+that my last, by Dover has reached you.
+
+Resentment, and even anger, are momentary emotions with me--and I wished
+to tell you so, that if you ever think of me, it may not be in the light
+of an enemy.
+
+That I have not been used _well_ I must ever feel; perhaps, not always
+with the keen anguish I do at present--for I began even now to write
+calmly, and I cannot restrain my tears.
+
+I am stunned!--Your late conduct still appears to me a frightful
+dream.--Ah! ask yourself if you have not condescended to employ a little
+address, I could almost say cunning, unworthy of you?--Principles are
+sacred things--and we never play with truth, with impunity.
+
+The expectation (I have too fondly nourished it) of regaining your
+affection, every day grows fainter and fainter.--Indeed, it seems to me,
+when I am more sad than usual, that I shall never see you more.--Yet you
+will not always forget me.--You will feel something like remorse, for
+having lived only for yourself--and sacrificed my peace to inferior
+gratifications. In a comfortless old age, you will remember that you had
+one disinterested friend, whose heart you wounded to the quick. The hour
+of recollection will come--and you will not be satisfied to act the part
+of a boy, till you fall into that of a dotard. I know that your mind,
+your heart, and your principles of action, are all superior to your
+present conduct. You do, you must, respect me--and you will be sorry to
+forfeit my esteem.
+
+You know best whether I am still preserving the remembrance of an
+imaginary being.--I once thought that I knew you thoroughly--but now I am
+obliged to leave some doubts that involuntarily press on me, to be
+cleared up by time.
+
+You may render me unhappy; but cannot make me contemptible in my own
+eyes.--I shall still be able to support my child, though I am
+disappointed in some other plans of usefulness, which I once believed
+would have afforded you equal pleasure.
+
+Whilst I was with you, I restrained my natural generosity, because I
+thought your property in jeopardy.--When I went to --------, I requested
+you, _if you could conveniently_, not to forget my father, sisters, and
+some other people, whom I was interested about.--Money was lavished away,
+yet not only my requests were neglected, but some trifling debts were not
+discharged, that now come on me.--Was this friendship--or generosity?
+Will you not grant you have forgotten yourself? Still I have an
+affection for you.--God bless you.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXVII.
+
+AS the parting from you for ever is the most serious event of my life, I
+will once expostulate with you, and call not the language of truth and
+feeling ingenuity!
+
+I know the soundness of your understanding--and know that it is
+impossible for you always to confound the caprices of every wayward
+inclination with the manly dictates of principle.
+
+You tell me "that I torment you."--Why do I?----Because you cannot
+estrange your heart entirely from me--and you feel that justice is on my
+side. You urge, "that your conduct was unequivocal."--It was not.--When
+your coolness has hurt me, with what tenderness have you endeavoured to
+remove the impression!--and even before I returned to England, you took
+great pains to convince me, that all my uneasiness was occasioned by the
+effect of a worn-out constitution--and you concluded your letter with
+these words, "Business alone has kept me from you.--Come to any port, and
+I will fly down to my two dear girls with a heart all their own."
+
+With these assurances, is it extraordinary that I should believe what I
+wished? I might--and did think that you had a struggle with old
+propensities; but I still thought that I and virtue should at last
+prevail. I still thought that you had a magnanimity of character, which
+would enable you to conquer yourself.
+
+--------, believe me, it is not romance, you have acknowledged to me
+feelings of this kind.--You could restore me to life and hope, and the
+satisfaction you would feel, would amply repay you.
+
+In tearing myself from you, it is my own heart I pierce--and the time
+will come, when you will lament that you have thrown away a heart, that,
+even in the moment of passion, you cannot despise.--I would owe every
+thing to your generosity--but, for God's sake, keep me no longer in
+suspense!--Let me see you once more!--
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXVIII.
+
+YOU must do as you please with respect to the child.--I could wish that
+it might be done soon, that my name may be no more mentioned to you. It
+is now finished.--Convinced that you have neither regard nor friendship,
+I disdain to utter a reproach, though I have had reason to think, that
+the "forbearance" talked of, has not been very delicate.--It is however
+of no consequence.--I am glad you are satisfied with your own conduct.
+
+I now solemnly assure you, that this is an eternal farewel.--Yet I flinch
+not from the duties which tie me to life.
+
+That there is "sophistry" on one side or other, is certain; but now it
+matters not on which. On my part it has not been a question of words. Yet
+your understanding or mine must be strangely warped--for what you term
+"delicacy," appears to me to be exactly the contrary. I have no criterion
+for morality, and have thought in vain, if the sensations which lead you
+to follow an ancle or step, be the sacred foundation of principle and
+affection. Mine has been of a very different nature, or it would not have
+stood the brunt of your sarcasms.
+
+The sentiment in me is still sacred. If there be any part of me that will
+survive the sense of my misfortunes, it is the purity of my affections.
+The impetuosity of your senses, may have led you to term mere animal
+desire, the source of principle; and it may give zest to some years to
+come.--Whether you will always think so, I shall never know.
+
+It is strange that, in spite of all you do, something like conviction
+forces me to believe, that you are not what you appear to be.
+
+I part with you in peace.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+LETTER
+ON THE
+PRESENT CHARACTER
+OF THE
+FRENCH NATION.
+
+
+LETTER
+
+_Introductory to a Series of Letters on the Present Character of the
+French Nation._
+
+
+Paris, February 15, 1793.
+
+My dear friend,
+
+IT is necessary perhaps for an observer of mankind, to guard as carefully
+the remembrance of the first impression made by a nation, as by a
+countenance; because we imperceptibly lose sight of the national
+character, when we become more intimate with individuals. It is not then
+useless or presumptuous to note, that, when I first entered Paris, the
+striking contrast of riches and poverty, elegance and slovenliness,
+urbanity and deceit, every where caught my eye, and saddened my soul; and
+these impressions are still the foundation of my remarks on the manners,
+which flatter the senses, more than they interest the heart, and yet
+excite more interest than esteem.
+
+The whole mode of life here tends indeed to render the people frivolous,
+and, to borrow their favourite epithet, amiable. Ever on the wing, they
+are always sipping the sparkling joy on the brim of the cup, leaving
+satiety in the bottom for those who venture to drink deep. On all sides
+they trip along, buoyed up by animal spirits, and seemingly so void of
+care, that often, when I am walking on the _Boulevards_, it occurs to me,
+that they alone understand the full import of the term leisure; and they
+trifle their time away with such an air of contentment, I know not how to
+wish them wiser at the expence of their gaiety. They play before me like
+motes in a sunbeam, enjoying the passing ray; whilst an English head,
+searching for more solid happiness, loses, in the analysis of pleasure,
+the volatile sweets of the moment. Their chief enjoyment, it is true,
+rises from vanity: but it is not the vanity that engenders vexation of
+spirit; on the contrary, it lightens the heavy burthen of life, which
+reason too often weighs, merely to shift from one shoulder to the other.
+
+Investigating the modification of the passion, as I would analyze the
+elements that give a form to dead matter, I shall attempt to trace to
+their source the causes which have combined to render this nation the
+most polished, in a physical sense, and probably the most superficial in
+the world; and I mean to follow the windings of the various streams that
+disembogue into a terrific gulf, in which all the dignity of our nature
+is absorbed. For every thing has conspired to make the French the most
+sensual people in the world; and what can render the heart so hard, or so
+effectually stifle every moral emotion, as the refinements of sensuality?
+
+The frequent repetition of the word French, appears invidious; let me
+then make a previous observation, which I beg you not to lose sight of,
+when I speak rather harshly of a land flowing with milk and honey.
+Remember that it is not the morals of a particular people that I would
+decry; for are we not all of the same stock? But I wish calmly to
+consider the stage of civilization in which I find the French, and,
+giving a sketch of their character, and unfolding the circumstances which
+have produced its identity, I shall endeavour to throw some light on the
+history of man, and on the present important subjects of discussion.
+
+I would I could first inform you that, out of the chaos of vices and
+follies, prejudices and virtues, rudely jumbled together, I saw the fair
+form of Liberty slowly rising, and Virtue expanding her wings to shelter
+all her children! I should then hear the account of the barbarities that
+have rent the bosom of France patiently, and bless the firm hand that
+lopt off the rotten limbs. But, if the aristocracy of birth is levelled
+with the ground, only to make room for that of riches, I am afraid that
+the morals of the people will not be much improved by the change, or the
+government rendered less venal. Still it is not just to dwell on the
+misery produced by the present struggle, without adverting to the
+standing evils of the old system. I am grieved--sorely grieved--when I
+think of the blood that has stained the cause of freedom at Paris; but I
+also hear the same live stream cry aloud from the highways, through which
+the retreating armies passed with famine and death in their rear, and I
+hide my face with awe before the inscrutable ways of providence, sweeping
+in such various directions the besom of destruction over the sons of men.
+
+Before I came to France, I cherished, you know, an opinion, that strong
+virtues might exist with the polished manners produced by the progress
+of civilization; and I even anticipated the epoch, when, in the course of
+improvement, men would labour to become virtuous, without being goaded on
+by misery. But now, the perspective of the golden age, fading before the
+attentive eye of observation, almost eludes my sight; and, losing thus in
+part my theory of a more perfect state, start not, my friend, if I bring
+forward an opinion, which at the first glance seems to be levelled
+against the existence of God! I am not become an Atheist, I assure you,
+by residing at Paris: yet I begin to fear that vice, or, if you will,
+evil, is the grand mobile of action, and that, when the passions are
+justly poized, we become harmless, and in the same proportion useless.
+
+The wants of reason are very few; and, were we to consider
+dispassionately the real value of most things, we should probably rest
+satisfied with the simple gratification of our physical necessities, and
+be content with negative goodness: for it is frequently, only that
+wanton, the Imagination, with her artful coquetry, who lures us forward,
+and makes us run over a rough road, pushing aside every obstacle merely
+to catch a disappointment.
+
+The desire also of being useful to others, is continually damped by
+experience; and, if the exertions of humanity were not in some measure
+their own reward, who would endure misery, or struggle with care, to make
+some people ungrateful, and others idle?
+
+You will call these melancholy effusions, and guess that, fatigued by
+the vivacity, which has all the bustling folly of childhood, without the
+innocence which renders ignorance charming, I am too severe in my
+strictures. It may be so; and I am aware that the good effects of the
+revolution will be last felt at Paris; where surely the soul of Epicurus
+has long been at work to root out the simple emotions of the heart,
+which, being natural, are always moral. Rendered cold and artificial by
+the selfish enjoyments of the senses, which the government fostered, is
+it surprising that simplicity of manners, and singleness of heart, rarely
+appear, to recreate me with the wild odour of nature, so passing sweet?
+
+Seeing how deep the fibres of mischief have shot, I sometimes ask, with a
+doubting accent, Whether a nation can go back to the purity of manners
+which has hitherto been maintained unsullied only by the keen air of
+poverty, when, emasculated by pleasure, the luxuries of prosperity are
+become the wants of nature? I cannot yet give up the hope, that a fairer
+day is dawning on Europe, though I must hesitatingly observe, that little
+is to be expected from the narrow principle of commerce which seems every
+where to be shoving aside _the point of honour_ of the _noblesse_. I can
+look beyond the evils of the moment, and do not expect muddied water to
+become clear before it has had time to stand; yet, even for the moment,
+it is the most terrific of all sights, to see men vicious without
+warmth--to see the order that should be the superscription of virtue,
+cultivated to give security to crimes which only thoughtlessness could
+palliate. Disorder is, in fact, the very essence of vice, though with the
+wild wishes of a corrupt fancy humane emotions often kindly mix to soften
+their atrocity. Thus humanity, generosity, and even self-denial,
+sometimes render a character grand, and even useful, when hurried away by
+lawless passions; but what can equal the turpitude of a cold calculator
+who lives for himself alone, and considering his fellow-creatures merely
+as machines of pleasure, never forgets that honesty is the best policy?
+Keeping ever within the pale of the law, he crushes his thousands with
+impunity; but it is with that degree of management, which makes him, to
+borrow a significant vulgarism, a villain _in grain_. The very excess of
+his depravation preserves him, whilst the more respectable beast of prey,
+who prowls about like the lion, and roars to announce his approach,
+falls into a snare.
+
+You may think it too soon to form an opinion of the future government,
+yet it is impossible to avoid hazarding some conjectures, when every
+thing whispers me, that names, not principles, are changed, and when I
+see that the turn of the tide has left the dregs of the old system to
+corrupt the new. For the same pride of office, the same desire of power
+are still visible; with this aggravation, that, fearing to return to
+obscurity after having but just acquired a relish for distinction, each
+hero, or philosopher, for all are dubbed with these new titles,
+endeavours to make hay while the sun shines; and every petty municipal
+officer, become the idol, or rather the tyrant of the day, stalks like a
+cock on a dunghil.
+
+I shall now conclude this desultory letter; which however will enable you
+to foresee that I shall treat more of morals than manners.
+
+Yours ------
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+FRAGMENT
+OF
+LETTERS
+ON THE
+MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+Introductory Letter.
+LETTER II. Management of the Mother during pregnancy: bathing.
+LETTER III. Lying-in.
+LETTER IV. The first month: diet: clothing.
+LETTER V. The three following months.
+LETTER VI. The remainder of the first year.
+LETTER VII. The second year, &c: conclusion.
+
+
+LETTERS ON THE MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER I.
+
+I OUGHT to apologize for not having written to you on the subject you
+mentioned; but, to tell you the truth, it grew upon me: and, instead of
+an answer, I have begun a series of letters on the management of children
+in their infancy. Replying then to your question, I have the public in
+my thoughts, and shall endeavour to show what modes appear to me
+necessary, to render the infancy of children more healthy and happy. I
+have long thought, that the cause which renders children as hard to rear
+as the most fragile plant, is our deviation from simplicity. I know that
+some able physicians have recommended the method I have pursued, and I
+mean to point out the good effects I have observed in practice. I am
+aware that many matrons will exclaim against me, and dwell on the number
+of children they have brought up, as their mothers did before them,
+without troubling themselves with new-fangled notions; yet, though, in my
+uncle Toby's words, they should attempt to silence me, by "wishing I had
+seen their large" families, I must suppose, while a third part of the
+human species, according to the most accurate calculation, die during
+their infancy, just at the threshold of life, that there is some error in
+the modes adopted by mothers and nurses, which counteracts their own
+endeavours. I may be mistaken in some particulars; for general rules,
+founded on the soundest reason, demand individual modification; but, if I
+can persuade any of the rising generation to exercise their reason on
+this head, I am content. My advice will probably be found most useful to
+mothers in the middle class; and it is from them that the lower
+imperceptibly gains improvement. Custom, produced by reason in one, may
+safely be the effect of imitation in the other.--    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+
+
+
+LETTERS
+TO
+Mr. JOHNSON,
+_BOOKSELLER_,
+IN
+ST. PAUL'S CHURCH-YARD.
+
+
+LETTERS
+TO
+Mr. JOHNSON.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+LETTER I.
+
+Dublin, April 14, [1787.]
+
+Dear sir,
+
+I AM still an invalid--and begin to believe that I ought never to expect
+to enjoy health. My mind preys on my body--and, when I endeavour to be
+useful, I grow too much interested for my own peace. Confined almost
+entirely to the society of children, I am anxiously solicitous for their
+future welfare, and mortified beyond measure, when counteracted in my
+endeavours to improve them.--I feel all a mother's fears for the swarm of
+little ones which surround me, and observe disorders, without having
+power to apply the proper remedies. How can I be reconciled to life, when
+it is always a painful warfare, and when I am deprived of all the
+pleasures I relish?--I allude to rational conversations, and domestic
+affections. Here, alone, a poor solitary individual in a strange land,
+tied to one spot, and subject to the caprice of another, can I be
+contented? I am desirous to convince you that I have _some_ cause for
+sorrow--and am not without reason detached from life. I shall hope to
+hear that you are well, and am yours sincerely
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER II.
+
+Henley, Thursday, Sept 13.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+SINCE I saw you, I have, literally speaking, _enjoyed_ solitude. My
+sister could not accompany me in my rambles; I therefore wandered alone,
+by the side of the Thames, and in the neighbouring beautiful fields and
+pleasure grounds: the prospects were of such a placid kind, I _caught_
+tranquillity while I surveyed them--my mind was _still_, though active.
+Were I to give you an account how I have spent my time, you would
+smile.--I found an old French bible here, and amused myself with
+comparing it with our English translation; then I would listen to the
+falling leaves, or observe the various tints the autumn gave to them--At
+other times, the singing of a robin, or the noise of a water-mill,
+engaged my attention--partial attention--, for I was, at the same time
+perhaps discussing some knotty point, or straying from this _tiny_ world
+to new systems. After these excursions, I returned to the family meals,
+told the children stories (they think me _vastly_ agreeable), and my
+sister was amused.--Well, will you allow me to call this way of passing
+my days pleasant?
+
+I was just going to mend my pen; but I believe it will enable me to say
+all I have to add to this epistle. Have you yet heard of an habitation
+for me? I often think of my new plan of life; and, lest my sister should
+try to prevail on me to alter it, I have avoided mentioning it to her. I
+am determined!--Your sex generally laugh at female determinations; but
+let me tell you, I never yet resolved to do, any thing of consequence,
+that I did not adhere resolutely to it, till I had accomplished my
+purpose, improbable as it might have appeared to a more timid mind. In
+the course of near nine-and-twenty years, I have gathered some
+experience, and felt many _severe_ disappointments--and what is the
+amount? I long for a little peace and _independence_! Every obligation we
+receive from our fellow-creatures is a new shackle, takes from our native
+freedom, and debases the mind, makes us mere earthworms--I am not fond of
+grovelling!
+
+I am, sir, yours, &c.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER III.
+
+Market Harborough, Sept. 20.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+YOU left me with three opulent tradesmen; their conversation was not
+calculated to beguile the way, when the sable curtain concealed the
+beauties of nature. I listened to the tricks of trade--and shrunk away,
+without wishing to grow rich; even the novelty of the subjects did not
+render them pleasing; fond as I am of tracing the passions in all their
+different forms--I was not surprised by any glimpse of the sublime, or
+beautiful--though one of them imagined I would be a useful partner in a
+good _firm_. I was very much fatigued, and have scarcely recovered
+myself. I do not expect to enjoy the same tranquil pleasures Henley
+afforded: I meet with new objects to employ my mind; but many painful
+emotions are complicated with the reflections they give rise to.
+
+I do not intend to enter on the _old_ topic, yet hope to hear from
+you--and am yours, &c.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IV.
+
+Friday Night.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+THOUGH your remarks are generally judicious--I cannot _now_ concur with
+you, I mean with respect to the preface[67-A], and have not altered it.
+I hate the usual smooth way of exhibiting proud humility. A general rule
+_only_ extends to the majority--and, believe me, the few judicious
+parents who may peruse my book, will not feel themselves hurt--and the
+weak are too vain to mind what is said in a book intended for children.
+
+I return you the Italian MS.--but do not hastily imagine that I am
+indolent. I would not spare any labour to do my duty--and, after the most
+laborious day, that single thought would solace me more than any
+pleasures the senses could enjoy. I find I could not translate the MS.
+well. If it was not a MS, I should not be so easily intimidated; but the
+hand, and errors in orthography, or abbreviations, are a stumbling-block
+at the first setting out.--I cannot bear to do any thing I cannot do
+well--and I should lose time in the vain attempt.
+
+I had, the other day, the satisfaction of again receiving a letter from
+my poor, dear Margaret[69-A].--With all a mother's fondness I could
+transcribe a part of it--She says, every day her affection to me, and
+dependence on heaven increase, &c.--I miss her innocent caresses--and
+sometimes indulge a pleasing hope, that she may be allowed to cheer my
+childless age--if I am to live to be old.--At any rate, I may hear of the
+virtues I may not contemplate--and my reason may permit me to love a
+female.--I now allude to ------. I have received another letter from her,
+and her childish complaints vex me--indeed they do--As usual, good-night.
+
+MARY.
+
+If parents attended to their children, I would not have written the
+stories; for, what are books--compared to conversations which affection
+inforces!--
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER V.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+REMEMBER you are to settle _my account_, as I want to know how much I am
+in your debt--but do not suppose that I feel any uneasiness on that
+score. The generality of people in trade would not be much obliged to me
+for a like civility, _but you were a man_ before you were a
+bookseller--so I am your sincere friend,
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VI.
+
+Friday Morning.
+
+I AM sick with vexation--and wish I could knock my foolish head against
+the wall, that bodily pain might make me feel less anguish from
+self-reproach! To say the truth, I was never more displeased with myself,
+and I will tell you the cause.--You may recollect that I did not mention
+to you the circumstance of ------ having a fortune left to him; nor did a
+hint of it drop from me when I conversed with my sister; because I knew
+he had a sufficient motive for concealing it. Last Sunday, when his
+character was aspersed, as I thought, unjustly, in the heat of
+vindication I informed ****** that he was now independent; but, at the
+same time, desired him not to repeat my information to B----; yet, last
+Tuesday, he told him all--and the boy at B----'s gave Mrs. ------ an
+account of it. As Mr. ------ knew he had only made a confident of me (I
+blush to think of it!) he guessed the channel of intelligence, and this
+morning came (not to reproach me, I wish he had!) but to point out the
+injury I have done him.--Let what will be the consequence, I will
+reimburse him, if I deny myself the necessaries of life--and even then my
+folly will sting me.--Perhaps you can scarcely conceive the misery I at
+this moment endure--that I, whose power of doing good is so limited,
+should do harm, galls my very soul. ****** may laugh at these
+qualms--but, supposing Mr. ------ to be unworthy, I am not the less to
+blame. Surely it is hell to despise one's self!--I did not want this
+additional vexation--at this time I have many that hang heavily on my
+spirits. I shall not call on you this month--nor stir out.--My stomach
+has been so suddenly and violently affected, I am unable to lean over the
+desk.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VII.
+
+AS I am become a reviewer, I think it right, in the way of business, to
+consider the subject. You have alarmed the editor of the Critical, as the
+advertisement prefixed to the Appendix plainly shows. The Critical
+appears to me to be a timid, mean production, and its success is a
+reflection on the taste and judgment of the public; but, as a body, who
+ever gave it credit for much? The voice of the people is only the voice
+of truth, when some man of abilities has had time to get fast hold of the
+GREAT NOSE of the monster. Of course, local fame is generally a clamour,
+and dies away. The Appendix to the Monthly afforded me more amusement,
+though every article almost wants energy and a _cant_ of virtue and
+liberality is strewed over it; always tame, and eager to pay court to
+established fame. The account of Necker is one unvaried tone of
+admiration. Surely men were born only to provide for the sustenance of
+the body by enfeebling the mind!
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VIII.
+
+YOU made me very low-spirited last night, by your manner of talking.--You
+are my only friend--the only person I am _intimate_ with.--I never had a
+father, or a brother--you have been both to me, ever since I knew
+you--yet I have sometimes been very petulant.--I have been thinking of
+those instances of ill-humour and quickness, and they appeared like
+crimes.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IX.
+
+Saturday Night.
+
+I AM a mere animal, and instinctive emotions too often silence the
+suggestions of reason. Your note--I can scarcely tell why, hurt me--and
+produced a kind of winterly smile, which diffuses a beam of despondent
+tranquillity over the features. I have been very ill--Heaven knows it was
+more than fancy--After some sleepless, wearisome nights, towards the
+morning I have grown delirious.--Last Thursday, in particular, I imagined
+------ was thrown into great distress by his folly; and I, unable to
+assist him, was in an agony. My nerves were in such a painful state of
+irritation--I suffered more than I can express--Society was
+necessary--and might have diverted me till I gained more strength; but I
+blushed when I recollected how often I had teazed you with childish
+complaints, and the reveries of a disordered imagination. I even
+_imagined_ that I intruded on you, because you never called on me--though
+you perceived that I was not well.--I have nourished a sickly kind of
+delicacy, which gives me many unnecessary pangs.--I acknowledge that life
+is but a jest--and often a frightful dream--yet catch myself every day
+searching for something serious--and feel real misery from the
+disappointment. I am a strange compound of weakness and resolution!
+However, if I must suffer, I will endeavour to suffer in silence. There
+is certainly a great defect in my mind--my wayward heart creates its own
+misery--Why I am made thus I cannot tell; and, till I can form some idea
+of the whole of my existence, I must be content to weep and dance like a
+child--long for a toy, and be tired of it as soon as I get it.
+
+We must each of us wear a fool's cap; but mine, alas! has lost its bells,
+and is grown so heavy, I find it intolerably troublesome.----Good-night!
+I have been pursuing a number of strange thoughts since I began to write,
+and have actually both wept and laughed immoderately--Surely I am a
+fool--
+
+MARY W.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER X.
+
+Monday Morning.
+
+I REALLY want a German grammar, as I intend to attempt to learn that
+language--and I will tell you the reason why.--While I live, I am
+persuaded, I must exert my understanding to procure an independence, and
+render myself useful. To make the task easier, I ought to store my mind
+with knowledge--The seed time is passing away. I see the necessity of
+labouring now--and of that necessity I do not complain; on the contrary,
+I am thankful that I have more than common incentives to pursue
+knowledge, and draw my pleasures from the employments that are within my
+reach. You perceive this is not a gloomy day--I feel at this moment
+particularly grateful to you--without your humane and _delicate_
+assistance, how many obstacles should I not have had to encounter--too
+often should I have been out of patience with my fellow-creatures, whom I
+wish to love!--Allow me to love you, my dear sir, and call friend a being
+I respect.--Adieu!
+
+MARY W.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XI.
+
+I THOUGHT you _very_ unkind, nay, very unfeeling, last night. My cares
+and vexations--I will say what I allow myself to think--do me honour, as
+they arise from my disinterestedness and _unbending_ principles; nor can
+that mode of conduct be a reflection on my understanding, which enables
+me to bear misery, rather than selfishly live for myself alone. I am not
+the only character deserving of respect, that has had to struggle with
+various sorrows--while inferior minds have enjoyed local fame and present
+comfort.--Dr. Johnson's cares almost drove him mad--but, I suppose, you
+would quietly have told him, he was a fool for not being calm, and that
+wise men striving against the stream, can yet be in good humour. I have
+done with insensible human wisdom,--"indifference cold in wisdom's
+guise,"--and turn to the source of perfection--who perhaps never
+disregarded an almost broken heart, especially when a respect, a
+practical respect, for virtue, sharpened the wounds of adversity. I am
+ill--I stayed in bed this morning till eleven o'clock, only thinking of
+getting money to extricate myself out of some of my difficulties--The
+struggle is now over. I will condescend to try to obtain some in a
+disagreeable way.
+
+Mr. ------ called on me just now--pray did you know his motive for
+calling[82-A]?--I think him impertinently officious.--He had left the
+house before it occurred to me in the strong light it does now, or I
+should have told him so--My poverty makes me proud--I will not be
+insulted by a superficial puppy.--His intimacy with Miss ------ gave him
+a privilege, which he should not have assumed with me--a proposal might
+be made to his cousin, a milliner's girl, which should not have been
+mentioned to me. Pray tell him that I am offended--and do not wish to see
+him again!--When I meet him at your house, I shall leave the room, since
+I cannot pull him by the nose. I can force my spirit to leave my
+body--but it shall never bend to support that body--God of heaven, save
+thy child from this living death!--I scarcely know what I write. My hand
+trembles--I am very sick--sick at heart.----
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XII.
+
+Tuesday Evening.
+
+Sir,
+
+WHEN you left me this morning, and I reflected a moment--your _officious_
+message, which at first appeared to me a joke--looked so very like an
+insult--I cannot forget it--To prevent then the necessity of forcing a
+smile--when I chance to meet you--I take the earliest opportunity of
+informing you of my real sentiments.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIII.
+
+Wednesday, 3 o'clock.
+
+Sir,
+
+IT is inexpressibly disagreeable to me to be obliged to enter again on a
+subject, that has already raised a tumult of _indignant_ emotions in my
+bosom, which I was labouring to suppress when I received your letter. I
+shall now _condescend_ to answer your epistle; but let me first tell you,
+that, in my _unprotected_ situation, I make a point of never forgiving a
+_deliberate insult_--and in that light I consider your late officious
+conduct. It is not according to my nature to mince matters--I will then
+tell you in plain terms, what I think. I have ever considered you in the
+light of a _civil_ acquaintance--on the word friend I lay a peculiar
+emphasis--and, as a mere acquaintance, you were rude and _cruel_, to step
+forward to insult a woman, whose conduct and misfortunes demand respect.
+If my friend, Mr. Johnson, had made the proposal--I should have been
+severely hurt--have thought him unkind and unfeeling, but not
+_impertinent_.--The privilege of intimacy you had no claim to--and should
+have referred the man to myself--if you had not sufficient discernment to
+quash it at once. I am, sir, poor and destitute.--Yet I have a spirit
+that will never bend, or take indirect methods, to obtain the consequence
+I despise; nay, if to support life it was necessary to act contrary to my
+principles, the struggle would soon be over. I can bear any thing but my
+own contempt.
+
+In a few words, what I call an insult, is the bare supposition that I
+could for a moment think of _prostituting_ my person for a maintenance;
+for in that point of view does such a marriage appear to me, who consider
+right and wrong in the abstract, and never by words and local opinions
+shield myself from the reproaches of my own heart and understanding.
+
+It is needless to say more--Only you must excuse me when I add, that I
+wish never to see, but as a perfect stranger, a person who could so
+grossly mistake my character. An apology is not necessary--if you were
+inclined to make one--nor any further expostulations.--I again repeat, I
+cannot overlook an affront; few indeed have sufficient delicacy to
+respect poverty, even where it gives lustre to a character--and I tell
+you sir, I am POOR--yet can live without your benevolent exertions.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIV.
+
+I SEND you _all_ the books I had to review except Dr. J--'s Sermons,
+which I have begun. If you wish me to look over any more trash this
+month--you must send it directly. I have been so low-spirited since I saw
+you--I was quite glad, last night, to feel myself affected by some
+passages in Dr. J--'s sermon on the death of his wife--I seemed
+(suddenly) to _find_ my _soul_ again--It has been for some time I cannot
+tell where. Send me the Speaker--and _Mary_, I want one--and I shall soon
+want some paper--you may as well send it at the same time--for I am
+trying to brace my nerves that I may be industrious.--I am afraid reason
+is not a good bracer--for I have been reasoning a long time with my
+untoward spirits--and yet my hand trembles.--I could finish a period very
+_prettily_ now, by saying that it ought to be steady when I add that I am
+yours sincerely,
+
+MARY.
+
+If you do not like the manner in which I reviewed Dr. J--'s s---- on his
+wife, be it known unto you--I _will_ not do it any other way--I felt some
+pleasure in paying a just tribute of respect to the memory of a
+man--who, spite of his faults, I have an affection for--I say _have_, for
+I believe he is somewhere--_where_ my soul has been gadding perhaps;--but
+_you_ do not live on conjectures.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XV.
+
+MY dear sir, I send you a chapter which I am pleased with, now I see it
+in one point of view--and, as I have made free with the author, I hope
+you will not have often to say--what does this mean?
+
+You forgot you were to make out my account--I am, of course, over head
+and ears in debt; but I have not that kind of pride, which makes some
+dislike to be obliged to those they respect.--On the contrary, when I
+involuntarily lament that I have not a father or brother, I thankfully
+recollect that I have received unexpected kindness from you and a few
+others.--So reason allows, what nature impels me to--for I cannot live
+without loving my fellow-creatures--nor can I love them, without
+discovering some virtue.
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVI.
+
+Paris, December 26, 1792.
+
+I SHOULD immediately on the receipt of your letter, my dear friend, have
+thanked you for your punctuality, for it highly gratified me, had I not
+wished to wait till I could tell you that this day was not stained with
+blood. Indeed the prudent precautions taken by the National Convention to
+prevent a tumult, made me suppose that the dogs of faction would not dare
+to bark, much less to bite, however true to their scent; and I was not
+mistaken; for the citizens, who were all called out, are returning home
+with composed countenances, shouldering their arms. About nine o'clock
+this morning, the king passed by my window, moving silently along
+(excepting now and then a few strokes on the drum, which rendered the
+stillness more awful) through empty streets, surrounded by the national
+guards, who, clustering round the carriage, seemed to deserve their name.
+The inhabitants flocked to their windows, but the casements were all
+shut, not a voice was heard, nor did I see any thing like an insulting
+gesture.--For the first time since I entered France, I bowed to the
+majesty of the people, and respected the propriety of behaviour so
+perfectly in unison with my own feelings. I can scarcely tell you why,
+but an association of ideas made the tears flow insensibly from my eyes,
+when I saw Louis sitting, with more dignity than I expected from his
+character, in a hackney coach, going to meet death, where so many of his
+race have triumphed. My fancy instantly brought Louis XIV before me,
+entering the capital with all his pomp, after one of the victories most
+flattering to his pride, only to see the sunshine of prosperity
+overshadowed by the sublime gloom of misery. I have been alone ever
+since; and, though my mind is calm, I cannot dismiss the lively images
+that have filled my imagination all the day.--Nay, do not smile, but pity
+me; for, once or twice, lifting my eyes from the paper, I have seen eyes
+glare through a glass-door opposite my chair and bloody hands shook at
+me. Not the distant sound of a footstep can I hear.--My apartments are
+remote from those of the servants, the only persons who sleep with me in
+an immense hotel, one folding door opening after another.--I wish I had
+even kept the cat with me!--I want to see something alive; death in so
+many frightful shapes has taken hold of my fancy.--I am going to
+bed--and, for the first time in my life, I cannot put out the candle.
+
+M. W.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[67-A] To Original Stories.
+
+[69-A] Countess Mount Cashel.
+
+[82-A] This alludes to a foolish proposal of marriage for mercenary
+considerations, which the gentleman here mentioned thought proper to
+recommend to her. The two letters which immediately follow, are addressed
+to the gentleman himself.
+
+
+
+
+EXTRACT
+
+OF THE
+
+CAVE OF FANCY.
+
+A TALE.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[_Begun to be written in the year 1787, but never completed_]
+
+
+CAVE OF FANCY.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. I.
+
+
+YE who expect constancy where every thing is changing, and peace in the
+midst of tumult, attend to the voice of experience, and mark in time the
+footsteps of disappointment, or life will be lost in desultory wishes,
+and death arrive before the dawn of wisdom.
+
+In a sequestered valley, surrounded by rocky mountains that intercepted
+many of the passing clouds, though sunbeams variegated their ample sides,
+lived a sage, to whom nature had unlocked her most hidden secrets. His
+hollow eyes, sunk in their orbits, retired from the view of vulgar
+objects, and turned inwards, overleaped the boundary prescribed to human
+knowledge. Intense thinking during fourscore and ten years, had whitened
+the scattered locks on his head, which, like the summit of the distant
+mountain, appeared to be bound by an eternal frost.
+
+On the sandy waste behind the mountains, the track of ferocious beasts
+might be traced, and sometimes the mangled limbs which they left,
+attracted a hovering flight of birds of prey. An extensive wood the sage
+had forced to rear its head in a soil by no means congenial, and the firm
+trunks of the trees seemed to frown with defiance on time; though the
+spoils of innumerable summers covered the roots, which resembled fangs;
+so closely did they cling to the unfriendly sand, where serpents hissed,
+and snakes, rolling out their vast folds, inhaled the noxious vapours.
+The ravens and owls who inhabited the solitude, gave also a thicker gloom
+to the everlasting twilight, and the croaking of the former a monotony,
+in unison with the gloom; whilst lions and tygers, shunning even this
+faint semblance of day, sought the dark caverns, and at night, when they
+shook off sleep, their roaring would make the whole valley resound,
+confounded with the screechings of the bird of night.
+
+One mountain rose sublime, towering above all, on the craggy sides of
+which a few sea-weeds grew, washed by the ocean, that with tumultuous
+roar rushed to assault, and even undermine, the huge barrier that stopped
+its progress; and ever and anon a ponderous mass, loosened from the
+cliff, to which it scarcely seemed to adhere, always threatening to fall,
+fell into the flood, rebounding as it fell, and the sound was re-echoed
+from rock to rock. Look where you would, all was without form, as if
+nature, suddenly stopping her hand, had left chaos a retreat.
+
+Close to the most remote side of it was the sage's abode. It was a rude
+hut, formed of stumps of trees and matted twigs, to secure him from the
+inclemency of the weather; only through small apertures crossed with
+rushes, the wind entered in wild murmurs, modulated by these
+obstructions. A clear spring broke out of the middle of the adjacent
+rock, which, dropping slowly into a cavity it had hollowed, soon
+overflowed, and then ran, struggling to free itself from the cumbrous
+fragments, till, become a deep, silent stream, it escaped through reeds,
+and roots of trees, whose blasted tops overhung and darkened the current.
+
+One side of the hut was supported by the rock, and at midnight, when the
+sage struck the inclosed part, it yawned wide, and admitted him into a
+cavern in the very bowels of the earth, where never human foot before had
+trod; and the various spirits, which inhabit the different regions of
+nature, were here obedient to his potent word. The cavern had been formed
+by the great inundation of waters, when the approach of a comet forced
+them from their source; then, when the fountains of the great deep were
+broken up, a stream rushed out of the centre of the earth, where the
+spirits, who have lived on it, are confined to purify themselves from
+the dross contracted in their first stage of existence; and it flowed in
+black waves, for ever bubbling along the cave, the extent of which had
+never been explored. From the sides and top, water distilled, and,
+petrifying as it fell, took fantastic shapes, that soon divided it into
+apartments, if so they might be called. In the foam, a wearied spirit
+would sometimes rise, to catch the most distant glimpse of light, or
+taste the vagrant breeze, which the yawning of the rock admitted, when
+Sagestus, for that was the name of the hoary sage, entered. Some, who
+were refined and almost cleared from vicious spots, he would allow to
+leave, for a limited time, their dark prison-house; and, flying on the
+winds across the bleak northern ocean, or rising in an exhalation till
+they reached a sun-beam, they thus re-visited the haunts of men. These
+were the guardian angels, who in soft whispers restrain the vicious, and
+animate the wavering wretch who stands suspended between virtue and vice.
+
+Sagestus had spent a night in the cavern, as he often did, and he left
+the silent vestibule of the grave, just as the sun, emerging from the
+ocean, dispersed the clouds, which were not half so dense as those he had
+left. All that was human in him rejoiced at the sight of reviving life,
+and he viewed with pleasure the mounting sap rising to expand the herbs,
+which grew spontaneously in this wild--when, turning his eyes towards the
+sea, he found that death had been at work during his absence, and
+terrific marks of a furious storm still spread horror around. Though the
+day was serene, and threw bright rays on eyes for ever shut, it dawned
+not for the wretches who hung pendent on the craggy rocks, or were
+stretched lifeless on the sand. Some, struggling, had dug themselves a
+grave; others had resigned their breath before the impetuous surge
+whirled them on shore. A few, in whom the vital spark was not so soon
+dislodged, had clung to loose fragments; it was the grasp of death;
+embracing the stone, they stiffened; and the head, no longer erect,
+rested on the mass which the arms encircled. It felt not the agonizing
+gripe, nor heard the sigh that broke the heart in twain.
+
+Resting his chin on an oaken club, the sage looked on every side, to see
+if he could discern any who yet breathed. He drew nearer, and thought he
+saw, at the first glance, the unclosed eyes glare; but soon perceived
+that they were a mere glassy substance, mute as the tongue; the jaws were
+fallen, and, in some of the tangled locks, hands were clinched; nay, even
+the nails had entered sharpened by despair. The blood flew rapidly to his
+heart; it was flesh; he felt he was still a man, and the big tear paced
+down his iron cheeks, whose muscles had not for a long time been relaxed
+by such humane emotions. A moment he breathed quick, then heaved a sigh,
+and his wonted calm returned with an unaccustomed glow of tenderness; for
+the ways of heaven were not hid from him; he lifted up his eyes to the
+common Father of nature, and all was as still in his bosom, as the smooth
+deep, after having closed over the huge vessel from which the wretches
+had fled.
+
+Turning round a part of the rock that jutted out, meditating on the ways
+of Providence, a weak infantine voice reached his ears; it was lisping
+out the name of mother. He looked, and beheld a blooming child leaning
+over, and kissing with eager fondness, lips that were insensible to the
+warm pressure. Starting at the sight of the sage, she fixed her eyes on
+him, "Wake her, ah! wake her," she cried, "or the sea will catch us."
+Again he felt compassion, for he saw that the mother slept the sleep of
+death. He stretched out his hand, and, smoothing his brow, invited her to
+approach; but she still intreated him to wake her mother, whom she
+continued to call, with an impatient tremulous voice. To detach her from
+the body by persuasion would not have been very easy. Sagestus had a
+quicker method to effect his purpose; he took out a box which contained a
+soporific powder, and as soon as the fumes reached her brain, the powers
+of life were suspended.
+
+He carried her directly to his hut, and left her sleeping profoundly on
+his rushy couch.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. II.
+
+
+AGAIN Sagestus approached the dead, to view them with a more scrutinizing
+eye. He was perfectly acquainted with the construction of the human body,
+knew the traces that virtue or vice leaves on the whole frame; they were
+now indelibly fixed by death; nay more, he knew by the shape of the solid
+structure, how far the spirit could range, and saw the barrier beyond
+which it could not pass: the mazes of fancy he explored, measured the
+stretch of thought, and, weighing all in an even balance, could tell whom
+nature had stamped an hero, a poet, or philosopher.
+
+By their appearance, at a transient glance, he knew that the vessel must
+have contained many passengers, and that some of them were above the
+vulgar, with respect to fortune and education; he then walked leisurely
+among the dead, and narrowly observed their pallid features.
+
+His eye first rested on a form in which proportion reigned, and, stroking
+back the hair, a spacious forehead met his view; warm fancy had revelled
+there, and her airy dance had left vestiges, scarcely visible to a mortal
+eye. Some perpendicular lines pointed out that melancholy had
+predominated in his constitution; yet the straggling hairs of his
+eye-brows showed that anger had often shook his frame; indeed, the four
+temperatures, like the four elements, had resided in this little world,
+and produced harmony. The whole visage was bony, and an energetic frown
+had knit the flexible skin of his brow; the kingdom within had been
+extensive; and the wild creations of fancy had there "a local habitation
+and a name." So exquisite was his sensibility, so quick his
+comprehension, that he perceived various combinations in an instant; he
+caught truth as she darted towards him, saw all her fair proportion at a
+glance, and the flash of his eye spoke the quick senses which conveyed
+intelligence to his mind; the sensorium indeed was capacious, and the
+sage imagined he saw the lucid beam, sparkling with love or ambition, in
+characters of fire, which a graceful curve of the upper eyelid shaded.
+The lips were a little deranged by contempt; and a mixture of vanity and
+self-complacency formed a few irregular lines round them. The chin had
+suffered from sensuality, yet there were still great marks of vigour in
+it, as if advanced with stern dignity. The hand accustomed to command,
+and even tyrannize, was unnerved; but its appearance convinced Sagestus,
+that he had oftener wielded a thought than a weapon; and that he had
+silenced, by irresistible conviction, the superficial disputant, and the
+being, who doubted because he had not strength to believe, who, wavering
+between different borrowed opinions, first caught at one straw, then at
+another, unable to settle into any consistency of character. After gazing
+a few moments, Sagestus turned away exclaiming, How are the stately oaks
+torn up by a tempest, and the bow unstrung, that could force the arrow
+beyond the ken of the eye!
+
+What a different face next met his view! The forehead was short, yet well
+set together; the nose small, but a little turned up at the end; and a
+draw-down at the sides of his mouth, proved that he had been a humourist,
+who minded the main chance, and could joke with his acquaintance, while
+he eagerly devoured a dainty which he was not to pay for. His lips shut
+like a box whose hinges had often been mended; and the muscles, which
+display the soft emotion of the heart on the cheeks, were grown quite
+rigid, so that, the vessels that should have moistened them not having
+much communication with the grand source of passions, the fine volatile
+fluid had evaporated, and they became mere dry fibres, which might be
+pulled by any misfortune that threatened himself, but were not
+sufficiently elastic to be moved by the miseries of others. His joints
+were inserted compactly, and with celerity they had performed all the
+animal functions, without any of the grace which results from the
+imagination mixing with the senses.
+
+A huge form was stretched near him, that exhibited marks of overgrown
+infancy; every part was relaxed; all appeared imperfect. Yet, some
+undulating lines on the puffed-out cheeks, displayed signs of timid,
+servile good nature; and the skin of the forehead had been so often drawn
+up by wonder, that the few hairs of the eyebrows were fixed in a sharp
+arch, whilst an ample chin rested in lobes of flesh on his protuberant
+breast.
+
+By his side was a body that had scarcely ever much life in it--sympathy
+seemed to have drawn them together--every feature and limb was round and
+fleshy, and, if a kind of brutal cunning had not marked the face, it
+might have been mistaken for an automaton, so unmixed was the phlegmatic
+fluid. The vital spark was buried deep in a soft mass of matter,
+resembling the pith in young elder, which, when found, is so equivocal,
+that it only appears a moister part of the same body.
+
+Another part of the beach was covered with sailors, whose bodies
+exhibited marks of strength and brutal courage.--Their characters were
+all different, though of the same class; Sagestus did not stay to
+discriminate them, satisfied with a rough sketch. He saw indolence roused
+by a love of humour, or rather bodily fun; sensuality and prodigality
+with a vein of generosity running through it; a contempt of danger with
+gross superstition; supine senses, only to be kept alive by noisy,
+tumultuous pleasures, or that kind of novelty which borders on absurdity:
+this formed the common outline, and the rest were rather dabs than
+shades.
+
+Sagestus paused, and remembered it had been said by an earthly wit, that
+"many a flower is born to blush unseen, and waste its sweetness on the
+desart air." How little, he exclaimed, did that poet know of the ways of
+heaven! And yet, in this respect, they are direct; the hands before me,
+were designed to pull a rope, knock down a sheep, or perform the servile
+offices of life; no "mute, inglorious poet" rests amongst them, and he
+who is superior to his fellow, does not rise above mediocrity. The genius
+that sprouts from a dunghil soon shakes off the heterogenous mass; those
+only grovel, who have not power to fly.
+
+He turned his step towards the mother of the orphan: another female was
+at some distance; and a man who, by his garb, might have been the
+husband, or brother, of the former, was not far off.
+
+Him the sage surveyed with an attentive eye, and bowed with respect to
+the inanimate clay, that lately had been the dwelling of a most
+benevolent spirit. The head was square, though the features were not very
+prominent; but there was a great harmony in every part, and the turn of
+the nostrils and lips evinced, that the soul must have had taste, to
+which they had served as organs. Penetration and judgment were seated on
+the brows that overhung the eye. Fixed as it was, Sagestus quickly
+discerned the expression it must have had; dark and pensive, rather from
+slowness of comprehension than melancholy, it seemed to absorb the light
+of knowledge, to drink it in ray by ray; nay, a new one was not allowed
+to enter his head till the last was arranged: an opinion was thus
+cautiously received, and maturely weighed, before it was added to the
+general stock. As nature led him to mount from a part to the whole, he
+was most conversant with the beautiful, and rarely comprehended the
+sublime; yet, said Sagestus, with a softened tone, he was all heart, full
+of forbearance, and desirous to please every fellow-creature; but from a
+nobler motive than a love of admiration; the fumes of vanity never
+mounted to cloud his brain, or tarnish his beneficence. The fluid in
+which those placid eyes swam, is now congealed; how often has tenderness
+given them the finest water! Some torn parts of the child's dress hung
+round his arm, which led the sage to conclude, that he had saved the
+child; every line in his face confirmed the conjecture; benevolence
+indeed strung the nerves that naturally were not very firm; it was the
+great knot that tied together the scattered qualities, and gave the
+distinct stamp to the character.
+
+The female whom he next approached, and supposed to be an attendant on
+the other, was below the middle size, and her legs were so
+disproportionably short, that, when she moved, she must have waddled
+along; her elbows were drawn in to touch her long taper, waist, and the
+air of her whole body was an affectation of gentility. Death could not
+alter the rigid hang of her limbs, or efface the simper that had
+stretched her mouth; the lips were thin, as if nature intended she should
+mince her words; her nose was small, and sharp at the end; and the
+forehead, unmarked by eyebrows, was wrinkled by the discontent that had
+sunk her cheeks, on which Sagestus still discerned faint traces of
+tenderness; and fierce good-nature, he perceived had sometimes animated
+the little spark of an eye that anger had oftener lighted. The same
+thought occurred to him that the sight of the sailors had suggested, Men
+and women are all in their proper places--this female was intended to
+fold up linen and nurse the sick.
+
+Anxious to observe the mother of his charge, he turned to the lily that
+had been so rudely snapped, and, carefully observing it, traced every
+fine line to its source. There was a delicacy in her form, so truly
+feminine, that an involuntary desire to cherish such a being, made the
+sage again feel the almost forgotten sensations of his nature. On
+observing her more closely, he discovered that her natural delicacy had
+been increased by an improper education, to a degree that took away all
+vigour from her faculties. And its baneful influence had had such an
+effect on her mind, that few traces of the exertions of it appeared on
+her face, though the fine finish of her features, and particularly the
+form of the forehead, convinced the sage that her understanding might
+have risen considerably above mediocrity, had the wheels ever been put in
+motion; but, clogged by prejudices, they never turned quite round, and,
+whenever she considered a subject, she stopped before she came to a
+conclusion. Assuming a mask of propriety, she had banished nature; yet
+its tendency was only to be diverted, not stifled. Some lines, which took
+from the symmetry of the mouth, not very obvious to a superficial
+observer, struck Sagestus, and they appeared to him characters of
+indolent obstinacy. Not having courage to form an opinion of her own, she
+adhered, with blind partiality, to those she adopted, which she received
+in the lump, and, as they always remained unopened, of course she only
+saw the even gloss on the outside. Vestiges of anger were visible on her
+brow, and the sage concluded, that she had often been offended with, and
+indeed would scarcely make any allowance for, those who did not coincide
+with her in opinion, as things always appear self-evident that have never
+been examined; yet her very weakness gave a charming timidity to her
+countenance; goodness and tenderness pervaded every lineament, and melted
+in her dark blue eyes. The compassion that wanted activity, was sincere,
+though it only embellished her face, or produced casual acts of charity
+when a moderate alms could relieve present distress. Unacquainted with
+life, fictitious, unnatural distress drew the tears that were not shed
+for real misery. In its own shape, human wretchedness excites a little
+disgust in the mind that has indulged sickly refinement. Perhaps the
+sage gave way to a little conjecture in drawing the last conclusion; but
+his conjectures generally arose from distinct ideas, and a dawn of light
+allowed him to see a great way farther than common mortals.
+
+He was now convinced that the orphan was not very unfortunate in having
+lost such a mother. The parent that inspires fond affection without
+respect, is seldom an useful one; and they only are respectable, who
+consider right and wrong abstracted from local forms and accidental
+modifications.
+
+Determined to adopt the child, he named it after himself, Sagesta, and
+retired to the hut where the innocent slept, to think of the best method
+of educating this child, whom the angry deep had spared.
+
+[The last branch of the education of Sagesta, consisted of a variety of
+characters and stories presented to her in the Cave of Fancy, of which
+the following is a specimen.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAP.
+
+
+A FORM now approached that particularly struck and interested Sagesta.
+The sage, observing what passed in her mind, bade her ever trust to the
+first impression. In life, he continued, try to remember the effect the
+first appearance of a stranger has on your mind; and, in proportion to
+your sensibility, you may decide on the character. Intelligence glances
+from eyes that have the same pursuits, and a benevolent heart soon traces
+the marks of benevolence on the countenance of an unknown
+fellow-creature; and not only the countenance, but the gestures, the
+voice, loudly speak truth to the unprejudiced mind.
+
+Whenever a stranger advances towards you with a tripping step, receives
+you with broad smiles, and a profusion of compliments, and yet you find
+yourself embarrassed and unable to return the salutation with equal
+cordiality, be assured that such a person is affected, and endeavours to
+maintain a very good character in the eyes of the world, without really
+practising the social virtues which dress the face in looks of unfeigned
+complacency. Kindred minds are drawn to each other by expressions which
+elude description; and, like the calm breeze that plays on a smooth lake,
+they are rather felt than seen. Beware of a man who always appears in
+good humour; a selfish design too frequently lurks in the smiles the
+heart never curved; or there is an affectation of candour that destroys
+all strength of character, by blending truth and falshood into an
+unmeaning mass. The mouth, in fact, seems to be the feature where you may
+trace every kind of dissimulation, from the simper of vanity, to the
+fixed smile of the designing villain. Perhaps, the modulations of the
+voice will still more quickly give a key to the character than even the
+turns of the mouth, or the words that issue from it; often do the tones
+of unpractised dissemblers give the lie to their assertions. Many people
+never speak in an unnatural voice, but when they are insincere: the
+phrases not corresponding with the dictates of the heart, have nothing to
+keep them in tune. In the course of an argument however, you may easily
+discover whether vanity or conviction stimulates the disputant, though
+his inflated countenance may be turned from you, and you may not see the
+gestures which mark self-sufficiency. He stopped, and the spirit began.
+
+I have wandered through the cave; and, as soon as I have taught you a
+useful lesson, I shall take my flight where my tears will cease to flow,
+and where mine eyes will no more be shocked with the sight of guilt and
+sorrow. Before many moons have changed, thou wilt enter, O mortal! into
+that world I have lately left. Listen to my warning voice, and trust not
+too much to the goodness which I perceive resides in thy breast. Let it
+be reined in by principles, lest thy very virtue sharpen the sting of
+remorse, which as naturally follows disorder in the moral world, as pain
+attends on intemperance in the physical. But my history will afford you
+more instruction than mere advice. Sagestus concurred in opinion with
+her, observing that the senses of children should be the first object of
+improvement; then their passions worked on; and judgment the fruit, must
+be the acquirement of the being itself, when out of leading-strings. The
+spirit bowed assent, and, without any further prelude, entered on her
+history.
+
+My mother was a most respectable character, but she was yoked to a man
+whose follies and vices made her ever feel the weight of her chains. The
+first sensation I recollect, was pity; for I have seen her weep over me
+and the rest of her babes, lamenting that the extravagance of a father
+would throw us destitute on the world. But, though my father was
+extravagant, and seldom thought of any thing but his own pleasures, our
+education was not neglected. In solitude, this employment was my mother's
+only solace; and my father's pride made him procure us masters; nay,
+sometimes he was so gratified by our improvement, that he would embrace
+us with tenderness, and intreat my mother to forgive him, with marks of
+real contrition. But the affection his penitence gave rise to, only
+served to expose her to continual disappointments, and keep hope alive
+merely to torment her. After a violent debauch he would let his beard
+grow, and the sadness that reigned in the house I shall never forget; he
+was ashamed to meet even the eyes of his children. This is so contrary to
+the nature of things, it gave me exquisite pain; I used, at those times,
+to show him extreme respect. I could not bear to see my parent humble
+himself before me. However neither his constitution, nor fortune could
+long bear the constant waste. He had, I have observed, a childish
+affection for his children, which was displayed in caresses that
+gratified him for the moment, yet never restrained the headlong fury of
+his appetites; his momentary repentance wrung his heart, without
+influencing his conduct; and he died, leaving an encumbered wreck of a
+good estate.
+
+As we had always lived in splendid poverty, rather than in affluence, the
+shock was not so great; and my mother repressed her anguish, and
+concealed some circumstances, that she might not shed a destructive
+mildew over the gaiety of youth.
+
+So fondly did I doat on this dear parent, that she engrossed all my
+tenderness; her sorrows had knit me firmly to her, and my chief care was
+to give her proofs of affection. The gallantry that afforded my
+companions, the few young people my mother forced me to mix with, so much
+pleasure, I despised; I wished more to be loved than admired, for I could
+love. I adored virtue; and my imagination, chasing a chimerical object,
+overlooked the common pleasures of life; they were not sufficient for my
+happiness. A latent fire made me burn to rise superior to my
+contemporaries in wisdom and virtue; and tears of joy and emulation
+filled my eyes when I read an account of a great action--I felt
+admiration, not astonishment.
+
+My mother had two particular friends, who endeavoured to settle her
+affairs; one was a middle-aged man, a merchant; the human breast never
+enshrined a more benevolent heart. His manners were rather rough, and he
+bluntly spoke his thoughts without observing the pain it gave; yet he
+possessed extreme tenderness, as far as his discernment went. Men do not
+make sufficient distinction, said she, digressing from her story to
+address Sagestus, between tenderness and sensibility.
+
+To give the shortest definition of sensibility, replied the sage, I
+should say that it is the result of acute senses, finely fashioned
+nerves, which vibrate at the slightest touch, and convey such clear
+intelligence to the brain, that it does not require to be arranged by the
+judgment. Such persons instantly enter into the characters of others, and
+instinctively discern what will give pain to every human being; their own
+feelings are so varied that they seem to contain in themselves, not only
+all the passions of the species, but their various modifications.
+Exquisite pain and pleasure is their portion; nature wears for them a
+different aspect than is displayed to common mortals. One moment it is a
+paradise; all is beautiful: a cloud arises, an emotion receives a sudden
+damp; darkness invades the sky, and the world is an unweeded garden;--but
+go on with your narrative, said Sagestus, recollecting himself.
+
+She proceeded. The man I am describing was humanity itself; but
+frequently he did not understand me; many of my feelings were not to be
+analyzed by his common sense. His friendships, for he had many friends,
+gave him pleasure unmixed with pain; his religion was coldly reasonable,
+because he wanted fancy, and he did not feel the necessity of finding,
+or creating, a perfect object, to answer the one engraved on his heart:
+the sketch there was faint. He went with the stream, and rather caught a
+character from the society he lived in, than spread one around him. In my
+mind many opinions were graven with a pen of brass, which he thought
+chimerical: but time could not erase them, and I now recognize them as
+the seeds of eternal happiness: they will soon expand in those realms
+where I shall enjoy the bliss adapted to my nature; this is all we need
+ask of the Supreme Being; happiness must follow the completion of his
+designs. He however could live quietly, without giving a preponderancy to
+many important opinions that continually obtruded on my mind; not having
+an enthusiastic affection for his fellow creatures, he did them good,
+without suffering from their follies. He was particularly attached to me,
+and I felt for him all the affection of a daughter; often, when he had
+been interesting himself to promote my welfare, have I lamented that he
+was not my father; lamented that the vices of mine had dried up one
+source of pure affection.
+
+The other friend I have already alluded to, was of a very different
+character; greatness of mind, and those combinations of feeling which are
+so difficult to describe, raised him above the throng, that bustle their
+hour out, lie down to sleep, and are forgotten. But I shall soon see him,
+she exclaimed, as much superior to his former self, as he then rose in my
+eyes above his fellow creatures! As she spoke, a glow of delight
+animated each feature; her countenance appeared transparent; and she
+silently anticipated the happiness she should enjoy, when she entered
+those mansions, where death-divided friends should meet, to part no more;
+where human weakness could not damp their bliss, or poison the cup of joy
+that, on earth, drops from the lips as soon as tasted, or, if some daring
+mortal snatches a hasty draught, what was sweet to the taste becomes a
+root of bitterness.
+
+He was unfortunate, had many cares to struggle with, and I marked on his
+cheeks traces of the same sorrows that sunk my own. He was unhappy I say,
+and perhaps pity might first have awoke my tenderness; for, early in
+life, an artful woman worked on his compassionate soul, and he united his
+fate to a being made up of such jarring elements, that he was still
+alone. The discovery did not extinguish that propensity to love, a high
+sense of virtue fed. I saw him sick and unhappy, without a friend to
+sooth the hours languor made heavy; often did I sit a long winter's
+evening by his side, railing at the swift wings of time, and terming my
+love, humanity.
+
+Two years passed in this manner, silently rooting my affection; and it
+might have continued calm, if a fever had not brought him to the very
+verge of the grave. Though still deceived, I was miserable that the
+customs of the world did not allow me to watch by him; when sleep forsook
+his pillow, my wearied eyes were not closed, and my anxious spirit
+hovered round his bed. I saw him, before he had recovered his strength;
+and, when his hand touched mine, life almost retired, or flew to meet
+the touch. The first look found a ready way to my heart, and thrilled
+through every vein. We were left alone, and insensibly began to talk of
+the immortality of the soul; I declared that I could not live without
+this conviction. In the ardour of conversation he pressed my hand to his
+heart; it rested there a moment, and my emotions gave weight to my
+opinion, for the affection we felt was not of a perishable nature.--A
+silence ensued, I know not how long; he then threw my hand from him, as
+if it had been a serpent; formally complained of the weather, and
+adverted to twenty other uninteresting subjects. Vain efforts! Our hearts
+had already spoken to each other.
+
+Feebly did I afterwards combat an affection, which seemed twisted in
+every fibre of my heart. The world stood still when I thought of him; it
+moved heavily at best, with one whose very constitution seemed to mark
+her out for misery. But I will not dwell on the passion I too fondly
+nursed. One only refuge had I on earth; I could not resolutely desolate
+the scene my fancy flew to, when worldly cares, when a knowledge of
+mankind, which my circumstances forced on me, rendered every other
+insipid. I was afraid of the unmarked vacuity of common life; yet, though
+I supinely indulged myself in fairy-land, when I ought to have been more
+actively employed, virtue was still the first mover of my actions; she
+dressed my love in such enchanting colours, and spread the net I could
+never break. Our corresponding feelings confounded our very souls; and
+in many conversations we almost intuitively discerned each other's
+sentiments; the heart opened itself, not chilled by reserve, nor afraid
+of misconstruction. But, if virtue inspired love, love gave new energy to
+virtue, and absorbed every selfish passion. Never did even a wish escape
+me, that my lover should not fulfil the hard duties which fate had
+imposed on him. I only dissembled with him in one particular; I
+endeavoured to soften his wife's too conspicuous follies, and extenuated
+her failings in an indirect manner. To this I was prompted by a loftiness
+of spirit; I should have broken the band of life, had I ceased to respect
+myself. But I will hasten to an important change in my circumstances.
+
+My mother, who had concealed the real state of her affairs from me, was
+now impelled to make me her confident, that I might assist to discharge
+her mighty debt of gratitude. The merchant, my more than father, had
+privately assisted her: but a fatal civil-war reduced his large property
+to a bare competency; and an inflammation in his eyes, that arose from a
+cold he had caught at a wreck, which he watched during a stormy night to
+keep off the lawless colliers, almost deprived him of sight. His life had
+been spent in society, and he scarcely knew how to fill the void; for his
+spirit would not allow him to mix with his former equals as an humble
+companion; he who had been treated with uncommon respect, could not brook
+their insulting pity. From the resource of solitude, reading, the
+complaint in his eyes cut him off, and he became our constant visitor.
+
+Actuated by the sincerest affection, I used to read to him, and he
+mistook my tenderness for love. How could I undeceive him, when every
+circumstance frowned on him! Too soon I found that I was his only
+comfort; I, who rejected his hand when fortune smiled, could not now
+second her blow; and, in a moment of enthusiastic gratitude and tender
+compassion, I offered him my hand.--It was received with pleasure;
+transport was not made for his soul; nor did he discover that nature had
+separated us, by making me alive to such different sensations. My mother
+was to live with us, and I dwelt on this circumstance to banish cruel
+recollections, when the bent bow returned to its former state.
+
+With a bursting heart and a firm voice, I named the day when I was to
+seal my promise. It came, in spite of my regret; I had been previously
+preparing myself for the awful ceremony, and answered the solemn question
+with a resolute tone, that would silence the dictates of my heart; it was
+a forced, unvaried one; had nature modulated it, my secret would have
+escaped. My active spirit was painfully on the watch to repress every
+tender emotion. The joy in my venerable parent's countenance, the
+tenderness of my husband, as he conducted me home, for I really had a
+sincere affection for him, the gratulations of my mind, when I thought
+that this sacrifice was heroic, all tended to deceive me; but the joy of
+victory over the resigned, pallid look of my lover, haunted my
+imagination, and fixed itself in the centre of my brain.--Still I
+imagined, that his spirit was near me, that he only felt sorrow for my
+loss, and without complaint resigned me to my duty.
+
+I was left alone a moment; my two elbows rested on a table to support my
+chin. Ten thousand thoughts darted with astonishing velocity through my
+mind. My eyes were dry; I was on the brink of madness. At this moment a
+strange association was made by my imagination; I thought of Gallileo,
+who when he left the inquisition, looked upwards, and cried out, "Yet it
+moves." A shower of tears, like the refreshing drops of heaven, relieved
+my parched sockets; they fell disregarded on the table; and, stamping
+with my foot, in an agony I exclaimed, "Yet I love." My husband entered
+before I had calmed these tumultuous emotions, and tenderly took my
+hand. I snatched it from him; grief and surprise were marked on his
+countenance; I hastily stretched it out again. My heart smote me, and I
+removed the transient mist by an unfeigned endeavour to please him.
+
+A few months after, my mind grew calmer; and, if a treacherous
+imagination, if feelings many accidents revived, sometimes plunged me
+into melancholy, I often repeated with steady conviction, that virtue was
+not an empty name, and that, in following the dictates of duty, I had not
+bidden adieu to content.
+
+In the course of a few years, the dear object of my fondest affection,
+said farewel, in dying accents. Thus left alone, my grief became dear;
+and I did not feel solitary, because I thought I might, without a crime,
+indulge a passion, that grew more ardent than ever when my imagination
+only presented him to my view, and restored my former activity of soul
+which the late calm had rendered torpid. I seemed to find myself again,
+to find the eccentric warmth that gave me identity of character. Reason
+had governed my conduct, but could not change my nature; this voluptuous
+sorrow was superior to every gratification of sense, and death more
+firmly united our hearts.
+
+Alive to every human affection, I smoothed my mothers passage to
+eternity, and so often gave my husband sincere proofs of affection, he
+never supposed that I was actuated by a more fervent attachment. My
+melancholy, my uneven spirits, he attributed to my extreme sensibility,
+and loved me the better for possessing qualities he could not
+comprehend.
+
+At the close of a summer's day, some years after, I wandered with
+careless steps over a pathless common; various anxieties had rendered the
+hours which the sun had enlightened heavy; sober evening came on; I
+wished to still "my mind, and woo lone quiet in her silent walk." The
+scene accorded with my feelings; it was wild and grand; and the spreading
+twilight had almost confounded the distant sea with the barren, blue
+hills that melted from my sight. I sat down on a rising ground; the rays
+of the departing sun illumined the horizon, but so indistinctly, that I
+anticipated their total extinction. The death of Nature led me to a still
+more interesting subject, that came home to my bosom, the death of him I
+loved. A village-bell was tolling; I listened, and thought of the moment
+when I heard his interrupted breath, and felt the agonizing fear, that
+the same sound would never more reach my ears, and that the intelligence
+glanced from my eyes, would no more be felt. The spoiler had seized his
+prey; the sun was fled, what was this world to me! I wandered to another,
+where death and darkness could not enter; I pursued the sun beyond the
+mountains, and the soul escaped from this vale of tears. My reflections
+were tinged with melancholy, but they were sublime.--I grasped a mighty
+whole, and smiled on the king of terrors; the tie which bound me to my
+friends he could not break; the same mysterious knot united me to the
+source of all goodness and happiness. I had seen the divinity reflected
+in a face I loved; I had read immortal characters displayed on a human
+countenance, and forgot myself whilst I gazed. I could not think of
+immortality, without recollecting the ecstacy I felt, when my heart first
+whispered to me that I was beloved; and again did I feel the sacred tie
+of mutual affection; fervently I prayed to the father of mercies; and
+rejoiced that he could see every turn of a heart, whose movements I could
+not perfectly understand. My passion seemed a pledge of immortality; I
+did not wish to hide it from the all-searching eye of heaven. Where
+indeed could I go from his presence? and, whilst it was dear to me,
+though darkness might reign during the night of life, joy would come when
+I awoke to life everlasting.
+
+I now turned my step towards home, when the appearance of a girl, who
+stood weeping on the common, attracted my attention. I accosted her, and
+soon heard her simple tale; that her father was gone to sea, and her
+mother sick in bed. I followed her to their little dwelling, and relieved
+the sick wretch. I then again sought my own abode; but death did not now
+haunt my fancy. Contriving to give the poor creature I had left more
+effectual relief, I reached my own garden-gate very weary, and rested on
+it.--Recollecting the turns of my mind during the walk, I exclaimed,
+Surely life may thus be enlivened by active benevolence, and the sleep of
+death, like that I am now disposed to fall into, may be sweet!
+
+My life was now unmarked by any extraordinary change, and a few days ago
+I entered this cavern; for through it every mortal must pass; and here I
+have discovered, that I neglected many opportunities of being useful,
+whilst I fostered a devouring flame. Remorse has not reached me, because
+I firmly adhered to my principles, and I have also discovered that I saw
+through a false medium. Worthy as the mortal was I adored, I should not
+long have loved him with the ardour I did, had fate united us, and broken
+the delusion the imagination so artfully wove. His virtues, as they now
+do, would have extorted my esteem; but he who formed the human soul, only
+can fill it, and the chief happiness of an immortal being must arise from
+the same source as its existence. Earthly love leads to heavenly, and
+prepares us for a more exalted state; if it does not change its nature,
+and destroy itself, by trampling on the virtue, that constitutes its
+essence, and allies us to the Deity.
+
+
+
+
+ON
+
+POETRY,
+
+AND
+
+OUR RELISH FOR THE BEAUTIES OF NATURE.
+
+
+ON
+
+POETRY, &c.
+
+
+A TASTE for rural scenes, in the present state of society, appears to be
+very often an artificial sentiment, rather inspired by poetry and
+romances, than a real perception of the beauties of nature. But, as it is
+reckoned a proof of refined taste to praise the calm pleasures which the
+country affords, the theme is never exhausted. Yet it may be made a
+question, whether this romantic kind of declamation, has much effect on
+the conduct of those, who leave, for a season, the crowded cities in
+which they were bred.
+
+I have been led to these reflections, by observing, when I have resided
+for any length of time in the country, how few people seem to contemplate
+nature with their own eyes. I have "brushed the dew away" in the morning;
+but, pacing over the printless grass, I have wondered that, in such
+delightful situations, the sun was allowed to rise in solitary majesty,
+whilst my eyes alone hailed its beautifying beams. The webs of the
+evening have still been spread across the hedged path, unless some
+labouring man, trudging to work, disturbed the fairy structure; yet, in
+spite of this supineness, when I joined the social circle, every tongue
+rang changes on the pleasures of the country.
+
+Having frequently had occasion to make the same observation, I was led to
+endeavour, in one of my solitary rambles, to trace the cause, and
+likewise to enquire why the poetry written in the infancy of society, is
+most natural: which, strictly speaking (for _natural_ is a very
+indefinite expression) is merely to say, that it is the transcript of
+immediate sensations, in all their native wildness and simplicity, when
+fancy, awakened by the sight of interesting objects, was most actively at
+work. At such moments, sensibility quickly furnishes similes, and the
+sublimated spirits combine images, which rising spontaneously, it is not
+necessary coldly to ransack the understanding or memory, till the
+laborious efforts of judgment exclude present sensations, and damp the
+fire of enthusiasm.
+
+The effusions of a vigorous mind, will ever tell us how far the
+understanding has been enlarged by thought, and stored with knowledge.
+The richness of the soil even appears on the surface; and the result of
+profound thinking, often mixing, with playful grace, in the reveries of
+the poet, smoothly incorporates with the ebullitions of animal spirits,
+when the finely fashioned nerve vibrates acutely with rapture, or when,
+relaxed by soft melancholy, a pleasing languor prompts the long-drawn
+sigh, and feeds the slowly falling tear.
+
+The poet, the man of strong feelings, gives us only an image of his mind,
+when he was actually alone, conversing with himself, and marking the
+impression which nature had made on his own heart.--If, at this sacred
+moment, the idea of some departed friend, some tender recollection when
+the soul was most alive to tenderness, intruded unawares into his
+thoughts, the sorrow which it produced is artlessly, yet poetically
+expressed--and who can avoid sympathizing?
+
+Love to man leads to devotion--grand and sublime images strike the
+imagination--God is seen in every floating cloud, and comes from the
+misty mountain to receive the noblest homage of an intelligent
+creature--praise. How solemn is the moment, when all affections and
+remembrances fade before the sublime admiration which the wisdom and
+goodness of God inspires, when he is worshipped in a _temple not made
+with hands_, and the world seems to contain only the mind that formed,
+and the mind that contemplates it! These are not the weak responses of
+ceremonial devotion; nor, to express them, would the poet need another
+poet's aid: his heart burns within him, and he speaks the language of
+truth and nature with resistless energy.
+
+Inequalities, of course, are observable in his effusions; and a less
+vigorous fancy, with more taste, would have produced more elegance and
+uniformity; but, as passages are softened or expunged during the cooler
+moments of reflection, the understanding is gratified at the expence of
+those involuntary sensations, which, like the beauteous tints of an
+evening sky, are so evanescent, that they melt into new forms before they
+can be analyzed. For however eloquently we may boast of our reason, man
+must often be delighted he cannot tell why, or his blunt feelings are not
+made to relish the beauties which nature, poetry, or any of the imitative
+arts, afford.
+
+The imagery of the ancients seems naturally to have been borrowed from
+surrounding objects and their mythology. When a hero is to be transported
+from one place to another, across pathless wastes, is any vehicle so
+natural, as one of the fleecy clouds on which the poet has often gazed,
+scarcely conscious that he wished to make it his chariot? Again, when
+nature seems to present obstacles to his progress at almost every step,
+when the tangled forest and steep mountain stand as barriers, to pass
+over which the mind longs for supernatural aid; an interposing deity, who
+walks on the waves, and rules the storm, severely felt in the first
+attempts to cultivate a country, will receive from the impassioned fancy
+"a local habitation and a name."
+
+It would be a philosophical enquiry, and throw some light on the history
+of the human mind, to trace, as far as our information will allow us to
+trace, the spontaneous feelings and ideas which have produced the images
+that now frequently appear unnatural, because they are remote; and
+disgusting, because they have been servilely copied by poets, whose
+habits of thinking, and views of nature must have been different; for,
+though the understanding seldom disturbs the current of our present
+feelings, without dissipating the gay clouds which fancy has been
+embracing, yet it silently gives the colour to the whole tenour of them,
+and the dream is over, when truth is grossly violated, or images
+introduced, selected from books, and not from local manners or popular
+prejudices.
+
+In a more advanced state of civilization, a poet is rather the creature
+of art, than of nature. The books that he reads in his youth, become a
+hot-bed in which artificial fruits are produced, beautiful to the common
+eye, though they want the true hue and flavour. His images do not arise
+from sensations; they are copies; and, like the works of the painters who
+copy ancient statues when they draw men and women of their own times, we
+acknowledge that the features are fine, and the proportions just; yet
+they are men of stone; insipid figures, that never convey to the mind the
+idea of a portrait taken from life, where the soul gives spirit and
+homogeneity to the whole. The silken wings of fancy are shrivelled by
+rules; and a desire of attaining elegance of diction, occasions an
+attention to words, incompatible with sublime, impassioned thoughts.
+
+A boy of abilities, who has been taught the structure of verse at school,
+and been roused by emulation to compose rhymes whilst he was reading
+works of genius, may, by practice, produce pretty verses, and even become
+what is often termed an elegant poet: yet his readers, without knowing
+what to find fault with, do not find themselves warmly interested. In the
+works of the poets who fasten on their affections, they see grosser
+faults, and the very images which shock their taste in the modern; still
+they do not appear as puerile or extrinsic in one as the
+other.--Why?--because they did not appear so to the author.
+
+It may sound paradoxical, after observing that those productions want
+vigour, that are merely the work of imitation, in which the understanding
+has violently directed, if not extinguished, the blaze of fancy, to
+assert, that, though genius be only another word for exquisite
+sensibility, the first observers of nature, the true poets, exercised
+their understanding much more than their imitators. But they exercised it
+to discriminate things, whilst their followers were busy to borrow
+sentiments and arrange words.
+
+Boys who have received a classical education, load their memory with
+words, and the correspondent ideas are perhaps never distinctly
+comprehended. As a proof of this assertion, I must observe, that I have
+known many young people who could write tolerably smooth verses, and
+string epithets prettily together, when their prose themes showed the
+barrenness of their minds, and how superficial the cultivation must have
+been, which their understanding had received.
+
+Dr. Johnson, I know, has given a definition of genius, which would
+overturn my reasoning, if I were to admit it.--He imagines, that _a
+strong mind, accidentally led to some particular study_ in which it
+excels, is a genius.--Not to stop to investigate the causes which
+produced this happy _strength_ of mind, experience seems to prove, that
+those minds have appeared most vigorous, that have pursued a study, after
+nature had discovered a bent; for it would be absurd to suppose, that a
+slight impression made on the weak faculties of a boy, is the fiat of
+fate, and not to be effaced by any succeeding impression, or unexpected
+difficulty. Dr. Johnson in fact, appears sometimes to be of the same
+opinion (how consistently I shall not now enquire), especially when he
+observes, "that Thomson looked on nature with the eye which she only
+gives to a poet."
+
+But, though it should be allowed that books may produce some poets, I
+fear they will never be the poets who charm our cares to sleep, or extort
+admiration. They may diffuse taste, and polish the language; but I am
+inclined to conclude that they will seldom rouse the passions, or amend
+the heart.
+
+And, to return to the first subject of discussion, the reason why most
+people are more interested by a scene described by a poet, than by a
+view of nature, probably arises from the want of a lively imagination.
+The poet contracts the prospect, and, selecting the most picturesque part
+in his _camera_, the judgment is directed, and the whole force of the
+languid faculty turned towards the objects which excited the most
+forcible emotions in the poet's heart; the reader consequently feels the
+enlivened description, though he was not able to receive a first
+impression from the operations of his own mind.
+
+Besides, it may be further observed, that gross minds are only to be
+moved by forcible representations. To rouse the thoughtless, objects must
+be presented, calculated to produce tumultuous emotions; the
+unsubstantial, picturesque forms which a contemplative man gazes on, and
+often follows with ardour till he is mocked by a glimpse of unattainable
+excellence, appear to them the light vapours of a dreaming enthusiast,
+who gives up the substance for the shadow. It is not within that they
+seek amusement; their eyes are seldom turned on themselves; consequently
+their emotions, though sometimes fervid, are always transient, and the
+nicer perceptions which distinguish the man of genuine taste, are not
+felt, or make such a slight impression as scarcely to excite any
+pleasurable sensations. Is it surprising then that they are often
+overlooked, even by those who are delighted by the same images
+concentrated by the poet?
+
+But even this numerous class is exceeded, by witlings, who, anxious to
+appear to have wit and taste, do not allow their understandings or
+feelings any liberty; for, instead of cultivating their faculties and
+reflecting on their operations, they are busy collecting prejudices; and
+are predetermined to admire what the suffrage of time announces as
+excellent, not to store up a fund of amusement for themselves, but to
+enable them to talk.
+
+These hints will assist the reader to trace some of the causes why the
+beauties of nature are not forcibly felt, when civilization, or rather
+luxury, has made considerable advances--those calm sensations are not
+sufficiently lively to serve as a relaxation to the voluptuary, or even
+to the moderate pursuer of artificial pleasures. In the present state of
+society, the understanding must bring back the feelings to nature, or the
+sensibility must have such native strength, as rather to be whetted than
+destroyed by the strong exercises of passion.
+
+That the most valuable things are liable to the greatest perversion, is
+however as trite as true:--for the same sensibility, or quickness of
+senses, which makes a man relish the tranquil scenes of nature, when
+sensation, rather than reason, imparts delight, frequently makes a
+libertine of him, by leading him to prefer the sensual tumult of love a
+little refined by sentiment, to the calm pleasures of affectionate
+friendship, in whose sober satisfactions, reason, mixing her
+tranquillizing convictions, whispers, that content, not happiness, is the
+reward of virtue in this world.
+
+
+
+
+HINTS.
+
+[_Chiefly designed to have been incorporated in the Second Part of the_
+Vindication of the Rights of Woman.]
+
+
+HINTS.
+
+
+1.
+
+INDOLENCE is the source of nervous complaints, and a whole host of cares.
+This devil might say that his name was legion.
+
+
+2.
+
+It should be one of the employments of women of fortune, to visit
+hospitals, and superintend the conduct of inferiors.
+
+
+3.
+
+It is generally supposed, that the imagination of women is particularly
+active, and leads them astray. Why then do we seek by education only to
+exercise their imagination and feeling, till the understanding, grown
+rigid by disuse, is unable to exercise itself--and the superfluous
+nourishment the imagination and feeling have received, renders the former
+romantic, and the latter weak?
+
+
+4.
+
+Few men have risen to any great eminence in learning, who have not
+received something like a regular education. Why are women expected to
+surmount difficulties that men are not equal to?
+
+
+5.
+
+Nothing can be more absurd than the ridicule of the critic, that the
+heroine of his mock-tragedy was in love with the very man whom she ought
+least to have loved; he could not have given a better reason. How can
+passion gain strength any other way? In Otaheite, love cannot be known,
+where the obstacles to irritate an indiscriminate appetite, and sublimate
+the simple sensations of desire till they mount to passion, are never
+known. There a man or woman cannot love the very person they ought not to
+have loved--nor does jealousy ever fan the flame.
+
+
+6.
+
+It has frequently been observed, that, when women have an object in view,
+they pursue it with more steadiness than men, particularly love. This is
+not a compliment. Passion pursues with more heat than reason, and with
+most ardour during the absence of reason.
+
+
+7.
+
+Men are more subject to the physical love than women. The confined
+education of women makes them more subject to jealousy.
+
+
+8.
+
+Simplicity seems, in general, the consequence of ignorance, as I have
+observed in the characters of women and sailors--the being confined to
+one track of impressions.
+
+
+9.
+
+I know of no other way of preserving the chastity of mankind, than that
+of rendering women rather objects of love than desire. The difference is
+great. Yet, while women are encouraged to ornament their persons at the
+expence of their minds, while indolence renders them helpless and
+lascivious (for what other name can be given to the common intercourse
+between the sexes?) they will be, generally speaking, only objects of
+desire; and, to such women, men cannot be constant. Men, accustomed only
+to have their senses moved, merely seek for a selfish gratification in
+the society of women, and their sexual instinct, being neither supported
+by the understanding nor the heart, must be excited by variety.
+
+
+10.
+
+We ought to respect old opinions; though prejudices, blindly adopted,
+lead to error, and preclude all exercise of the reason.
+
+The emulation which often makes a boy mischievous, is a generous spur;
+and the old remark, that unlucky, turbulent boys, make the wisest and
+best men, is true, spite of Mr. Knox's arguments. It has been observed,
+that the most adventurous horses, when tamed or domesticated, are the
+most mild and tractable.
+
+
+11.
+
+The children who start up suddenly at twelve or fourteen, and fall into
+decays, in consequence, as it is termed, of outgrowing their strength,
+are in general, I believe, those children, who have been bred up with
+mistaken tenderness, and not allowed to sport and take exercise in the
+open air. This is analogous to plants: for it is found that they run up
+sickly, long stalks, when confined.
+
+
+12.
+
+Children should be taught to feel deference, not to practise submission.
+
+
+13.
+
+It is always a proof of false refinement, when a fastidious taste
+overpowers sympathy.
+
+
+14.
+
+Lust appears to be the most natural companion of wild ambition; and love
+of human praise, of that dominion erected by cunning.
+
+
+15.
+
+"Genius decays as judgment increases." Of course, those who have the
+least genius, have the earliest appearance of wisdom.
+
+
+16.
+
+A knowledge of the fine arts, is seldom subservient to the promotion of
+either religion or virtue. Elegance is often indecency; witness our
+prints.
+
+
+17.
+
+There does not appear to be any evil in the world, but what is necessary.
+The doctrine of rewards and punishments, not considered as a means of
+reformation, appears to me an infamous libel on divine goodness.
+
+
+18.
+
+Whether virtue is founded on reason or revelation, virtue is wisdom, and
+vice is folly. Why are positive punishments?
+
+
+19.
+
+Few can walk alone. The staff of Christianity is the necessary support of
+human weakness. But an acquaintance with the nature of man and virtue,
+with just sentiments on the attributes, would be sufficient, without a
+voice from heaven, to lead some to virtue, but not the mob.
+
+
+20.
+
+I only expect the natural reward of virtue, whatever it may be. I rely
+not on a positive reward.
+
+The justice of God can be vindicated by a belief in a future state--but
+a continuation of being vindicates it as clearly, as the positive system
+of rewards and punishments--by evil educing good for the individual, and
+not for an imaginary whole. The happiness of the whole must arise from
+the happiness of the constituent parts, or this world is not a state of
+trial, but a school.
+
+
+21.
+
+The vices acquired by Augustus to retain his power, must have tainted his
+soul, and prevented that increase of happiness a good man expects in the
+next stage of existence. This was a natural punishment.
+
+
+22.
+
+The lover is ever most deeply enamoured, when it is with he knows not
+what--and the devotion of a mystic has a rude Gothic grandeur in it,
+which the respectful adoration of a philosopher will never reach. I may
+be thought fanciful; but it has continually occurred to me, that, though,
+I allow, reason in this world is the mother of wisdom--yet some flights
+of the imagination seem to reach what wisdom cannot teach--and, while
+they delude us here, afford a glorious hope, if not a foretaste, of what
+we may expect hereafter. He that created us, did not mean to mark us with
+ideal images of grandeur, the _baseless fabric of a vision_--No--that
+perfection we follow with hopeless ardour when the whisperings of reason
+are heard, may be found, when not incompatible with our state, in the
+round of eternity. Perfection indeed must, even then, be a comparative
+idea--but the wisdom, the happiness of a superior state, has been
+supposed to be intuitive, and the happiest effusions of human genius have
+seemed like inspiration--the deductions of reason destroy sublimity.
+
+
+23.
+
+I am more and more convinced, that poetry is the first effervescence of
+the imagination, and the forerunner of civilization.
+
+
+24.
+
+When the Arabs had no trace of literature or science, they composed
+beautiful verses on the subjects of love and war. The flights of the
+imagination, and the laboured deductions of reason, appear almost
+incompatible.
+
+
+25.
+
+Poetry certainly flourishes most in the first rude state of society. The
+passions speak most eloquently, when they are not shackled by reason.
+The sublime expression, which has been so often quoted, [Genesis, ch. 1,
+ver. 3.] is perhaps a barbarous flight; or rather the grand conception of
+an uncultivated mind; for it is contrary to nature and experience, to
+suppose that this account is founded on facts--It is doubtless a sublime
+allegory. But a cultivated mind would not thus have described the
+creation--for, arguing from analogy, it appears that creation must have
+been a comprehensive plan, and that the Supreme Being always uses second
+causes, slowly and silently to fulfil his purpose. This is, in reality, a
+more sublime view of that power which wisdom supports: but it is not the
+sublimity that would strike the impassioned mind, in which the
+imagination took place of intellect. Tell a being, whose affections and
+passions have been more exercised than his reason, that God said, _Let
+there be light! and there was light_; and he would prostrate himself
+before the Being who could thus call things out of nothing, as if they
+were: but a man in whom reason had taken place of passion, would not
+adore, till wisdom was conspicuous as well as power, for his admiration
+must be founded on principle.
+
+
+26.
+
+Individuality is ever conspicuous in those enthusiastic flights of fancy,
+in which reason is left behind, without being lost sight of.
+
+
+27.
+
+The mind has been too often brought to the test of enquiries which only
+reach to matter--put into the crucible, though the magnetic and electric
+fluid escapes from the experimental philosopher.
+
+
+28.
+
+Mr. Kant has observed, that the understanding is sublime, the imagination
+beautiful--yet it is evident, that poets, and men who undoubtedly possess
+the liveliest imagination, are most touched by the sublime, while men who
+have cold, enquiring minds, have not this exquisite feeling in any great
+degree, and indeed seem to lose it as they cultivate their reason.
+
+
+29.
+
+The Grecian buildings are graceful--they fill the mind with all those
+pleasing emotions, which elegance and beauty never fail to excite in a
+cultivated mind--utility and grace strike us in unison--the mind is
+satisfied--things appear just what they ought to be: a calm satisfaction
+is felt, but the imagination has nothing to do--no obscurity darkens the
+gloom--like reasonable content, we can say why we are pleased--and this
+kind of pleasure may be lasting, but it is never great.
+
+
+30.
+
+When we say that a person is an original, it is only to say in other
+words that he thinks. "The less a man has cultivated his rational
+faculties, the more powerful is the principle of imitation, over his
+actions, and his habits of thinking. Most women, of course, are more
+influenced by the behaviour, the fashions, and the opinions of those with
+whom they associate, than men." (Smellie.)
+
+When we read a book which supports our favourite opinions, how eagerly do
+we suck in the doctrines, and suffer our minds placidly to reflect the
+images which illustrate the tenets we have embraced? We indolently or
+quietly acquiesce in the conclusion, and our spirit animates and connects
+the various subjects. But, on the contrary, when we peruse a skilful
+writer, who does not coincide in opinion with us, how is the mind on the
+watch to detect fallacy? And this coolness often prevents our being
+carried away by a stream of eloquence, which the prejudiced mind terms
+declamation--a pomp of words.--We never allow ourselves to be warmed;
+and, after contending with the writer, are more confirmed in our own
+opinion, as much perhaps from a spirit of contradiction as from
+reason.--Such is the strength of man!
+
+
+31.
+
+It is the individual manner of seeing and feeling, pourtrayed by a strong
+imagination in bold images that have struck the senses, which creates
+all the charms of poetry. A great reader is always quoting the
+description of another's emotions; a strong imagination delights to paint
+its own. A writer of genius makes us feel; an inferior author reason.
+
+
+32.
+
+Some principle prior to self-love must have existed: the feeling which
+produced the pleasure, must have existed before the experience.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+
+Transcriber's Notes:
+
+1. Obvious punctuation errors repaired.
+
+2. This text contains blank space and lines of "--" and "*" characters.
+These are replicated from the printed pages, presumably they indicate
+censored text from the original source.
+
+3. The listed errata at the beginning of Volume 1 and Volume 4 have been
+applied to the text.
+
+4. The text as printed used incipits and 'long s' font. The incipits have
+not been replicated in this version, but can be viewed on 'long s' HTML
+version of the text or the page images linked from the HTML versions.
+
+5. Corrections:
+Volume 1, Page 33, "accuteness" changed to "acuteness"
+Volume 1, Page 51, "unfortutunate" changed to "unfortunate"
+Volume 1, Page 57, "resource" changed to "recourse"
+Volume 1, Page 90, "hunted" changed to "shunted"
+Volume 1, Page 103, "carreer" changed to "career"
+Volume 1, Page 161, "plased" changed to "pleased"
+Volume 2, Page 116, "and and" changed to "and"
+Volume 3, Page 35, "a r" changed to "air"
+Volume 3, Page 81, "he he" changed to "he"
+Volume 3, Page 120, "explananations" changed to "explanations"
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft
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+      The Project Gutenberg eBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft Godwin
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+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Posthumous Works
+       of the Author of A Vindication of the Rights of Woman
+
+Author: Mary Wollstonecraft
+
+Editor: William Godwin
+
+Release Date: October 29, 2007 [EBook #23233]
+Last Updated: May 4, 2018
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POSTHUMOUS WORKS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Jonathan Ingram, Online Distributed Proofreading
+Team at http://www.pgdp.net and the booksmiths at
+http://www.eBookForge.net
+
+HTML file revised by David Widger
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<h1>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2>CONTENTS</h2>
+<h3>Modern Text</h3>
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap">
+<a href="#V1">VOL. I.</a> and
+<a href="#V2">II.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">The Wrongs of Woman, or Maria; a Fragment:
+to which is added, the First Book
+of a Series of Lessons for Children.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap">
+<a href="#V3">VOL. III.</a> and
+<a href="#V4">IV.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">Letters and Miscellaneous Pieces.</p>
+
+<h3>Text in 'Long S' Format</h3>
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap">
+<a href="#V1S">VOL. I.</a> and
+<a href="#V2S">II.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">The Wrongs of Woman, or Maria; a Fragment:
+to which is added, the Fir&#383;t Book
+of a Series of Le&#383;&#383;ons for Children.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap">
+<a href="#V3S">VOL. III.</a> and
+<a href="#V4S">IV.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">Letters and Mi&#383;cellaneous Pieces.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+
+<div class='tnote'><h3>Transcriber's Notes</h3>
+<p><b>1.</b> Corrections which have been made are indicated by dotted lines under
+the corrected text.
+Scroll the mouse over the word and the original text will <ins class="err"
+title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'apprear'">appear</ins>.</p>
+
+<p><b>2.</b> This text contains blank space and lines of "&mdash;&mdash;" and "*" characters.
+These are replicated from the printed pages, presumably they indicate censored text from
+the original source.</p>
+
+<p><b>3.</b> The listed errata at the beginning of Volume 1 and Volume 4 have been applied
+to the text.</p>
+
+<p><b>4.</b> The text as printed used incipits and long s font. The incipits have not
+been replicated in this version, but can be viewed on the page images. A version of
+the text containing the long s font has been made available.</p>
+</div>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-i" id="APg_1-i"></a>[<a href="images/v1-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h1><a name="V1" id="V1"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>VOL. I.</h2>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-ii" id="APg_1-ii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-iii" id="APg_1-iii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. I.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-iv" id="APg_1-iv"></a>[<a href="images/v1-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-v" id="APg_1-v"></a>[<a href="images/v1-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>THE</h3>
+
+<h1>WRONGS OF WOMAN:</h1>
+
+<h3>OR,</h3>
+
+<h1>MARIA.</h1>
+
+<h2>A FRAGMENT.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. I.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-vi" id="APg_1-vi"></a>[<a href="images/v1-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-vii" id="APg_1-vii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-vii.png">vii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2><a name="AV1_PREFACE" id="AV1_PREFACE"></a>PREFACE.</h2>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> public are here presented with
+the last literary attempt of an author,
+whose fame has been uncommonly extensive,
+and whose talents have probably
+been most admired, by the persons
+by whom talents are estimated
+with the greatest accuracy and discrimination.
+There are few, to whom
+her writings could in any case have<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-viii" id="APg_1-viii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-viii.png">viii</a>]</span>
+given pleasure, that would have wished
+that this fragment should have been
+suppressed, because it is a fragment.
+There is a sentiment, very dear to minds
+of taste and imagination, that finds a
+melancholy delight in contemplating
+these unfinished productions of genius,
+these sketches of what, if they had
+been filled up in a manner adequate to
+the writer's conception, would perhaps
+have given a new impulse to the
+manners of a world.</p>
+
+<p>The purpose and structure of the
+following work, had long formed a
+favourite subject of meditation with
+its author, and she judged them capable
+of producing an important effect.<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-ix" id="APg_1-ix"></a>[<a href="images/v1-ix.png">ix</a>]</span>
+The composition had been in progress
+for a period of twelve months. She
+was anxious to do justice to her conception,
+and recommenced and revised
+the manuscript several different times.
+So much of it as is here given to the
+public, she was far from considering
+as finished, and, in a letter to a friend
+directly written on this subject, she
+says, "I am perfectly aware that some of
+the incidents ought to be transposed,
+and heightened by more harmonious
+shading; and I wished in some degree
+to avail myself of criticism, before I
+began to adjust my events into a story,
+the outline of which I had sketched in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-x" id="APg_1-x"></a>[<a href="images/v1-x.png">x</a>]</span>
+my mind<a name="AFNanchor_X-A_1" id="AFNanchor_X-A_1"></a><a href="#AFootnote_X-A_1" class="fnanchor">[x-A]</a>." The only friends to whom
+the author communicated her manuscript,
+were Mr. Dyson, the translator
+of the Sorcerer, and the present editor;
+and it was impossible for the most inexperienced
+author to display a stronger
+desire of profiting by the censures and
+sentiments that might be suggested<a name="AFNanchor_X-B_2" id="AFNanchor_X-B_2"></a><a href="#AFootnote_X-B_2" class="fnanchor">[x-B]</a>.</p>
+
+<p>In revising these sheets for the press,
+it was necessary for the editor, in some
+places, to connect the more finished<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xi" id="APg_1-xi"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xi.png">xi</a>]</span>
+parts with the pages of an older copy,
+and a line or two in addition sometimes
+appeared requisite for that purpose.
+Wherever such a liberty has been
+taken, the additional phrases will be
+found inclosed in brackets; it being
+the editor's most earnest desire, to
+intrude nothing of himself into the
+work, but to give to the public the
+words, as well as ideas, of the real
+author.</p>
+
+<p>What follows in the ensuing pages,
+is not a preface regularly drawn out
+by the author, but merely hints for a
+preface, which, though never filled up
+in the manner the writer intended,
+appeared to be worth preserving.</p>
+
+<p class="right">W. GODWIN.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xii" id="APg_1-xii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xii.png">xii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xiii" id="APg_1-xiii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xiii.png">xiii</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="AAUTHORs_PREFACE" id="AAUTHORs_PREFACE"></a><span class="smcap">AUTHOR's PREFACE.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> Wrongs of Woman, like the
+wrongs of the oppressed part of mankind,
+may be deemed necessary by
+their oppressors: but surely there are
+a few, who will dare to advance before
+the improvement of the age, and
+grant that my sketches are not the
+abortion of a distempered fancy, or
+the strong delineations of a wounded
+heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xiv" id="APg_1-xiv"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xiv.png">xiv</a>]</span>In writing this novel, I have rather
+endeavoured to pourtray passions than
+manners.</p>
+
+<p>In many instances I could have made
+the incidents more dramatic, would I
+have sacrificed my main object, the
+desire of exhibiting the misery and
+oppression, peculiar to women, that
+arise out of the partial laws and customs
+of society.</p>
+
+<p>In the invention of the story, this
+view restrained my fancy; and the
+history ought rather to be considered,
+as of woman, than of an individual.</p>
+
+<p>The sentiments I have embodied.</p>
+
+<p>In many works of this species, the
+hero is allowed to be mortal, and to<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xv" id="APg_1-xv"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xv.png">xv</a>]</span>
+become wise and virtuous as well as
+happy, by a train of events and circumstances.
+The heroines, on the
+contrary, are to be born immaculate;
+and to act like goddesses of wisdom, just
+come forth highly finished Minervas
+from the head of Jove.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p>[The following is an extract of a
+letter from the author to a friend, to
+whom she communicated her manuscript.]</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>For my part, I cannot suppose any
+situation more distressing, than for a<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xvi" id="APg_1-xvi"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xvi.png">xvi</a>]</span>
+woman of sensibility, with an improving
+mind, to be bound to such a man
+as I have described for life; obliged
+to renounce all the humanizing affections,
+and to avoid cultivating her
+taste, lest her perception of grace and
+refinement of sentiment, should sharpen
+to agony the pangs of disappointment.
+Love, in which the imagination
+mingles its bewitching colouring,
+must be fostered by delicacy. I should
+despise, or rather call her an ordinary
+woman, who could endure such a husband
+as I have sketched.</p>
+
+<p>These appear to me (matrimonial
+despotism of heart and conduct) to be
+the peculiar Wrongs of Woman, be<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xvii" id="APg_1-xvii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xvii.png">xvii</a>]</span>cause
+they degrade the mind. What
+are termed great misfortunes, may
+more forcibly impress the mind of common
+readers; they have more of what
+may justly be termed <i>stage-effect</i>; but
+it is the delineation of finer sensations,
+which, in my opinion, constitutes the
+merit of our best novels. This is what
+I have in view; and to show the
+wrongs of different classes of women,
+equally oppressive, though, from the
+difference of education, necessarily
+various.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_X-A_1" id="AFootnote_X-A_1"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_X-A_1"><span class="label">[x-A]</span></a> A more copious extract of this letter is subjoined
+to the author's preface.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_X-B_2" id="AFootnote_X-B_2"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_X-B_2"><span class="label">[x-B]</span></a> The part communicated consisted of the
+first fourteen chapters.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xviii" id="APg_1-xviii"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xviii.png">xviii</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="AERRATA" id="AERRATA"></a>ERRATA.</h2>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p>Page 3, line 2, <i>dele</i> half.</p>
+
+<p>P. 81 and 118, <i>for</i> brackets [&mdash;], <i>read</i>
+inverted commas " thus "</p></div>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xix" id="APg_1-xix"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xix.png">xix</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="AV1_CONTENTS" id="AV1_CONTENTS"></a>CONTENTS.</h2>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap"><a href="#V1">VOL. I.</a> and <a href="#V2">II.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">The Wrongs of Woman, or Maria; a Fragment:
+to which is added, the First Book
+of a Series of Lessons for Children.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap"><a href="#V3">VOL. III.</a> and <a href="#V4">IV.</a></span></p>
+.
+<p class="center">Letters and Miscellaneous Pieces.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xx" id="APg_1-xx"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xx.png">xx</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-1" id="APg_1-1"></a>[<a href="images/v1-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3><a name="AV1_WRONGS" id="AV1_WRONGS"></a><i>WRONGS</i></h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_I" id="ACHAP_I"></a>CHAP. I.</h2>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Abodes</span> of horror have frequently
+been described, and castles, filled with
+spectres and chimeras, conjured up by
+the magic spell of genius to harrow the
+soul, and absorb the wondering mind.
+But, formed of such stuff as dreams are
+made of, what were they to the mansion
+of despair, in one corner of which
+Maria sat, endeavouring to recal her
+scattered thoughts!</p>
+
+<p>Surprise, astonishment, that bordered
+on distraction, seemed to have suspend<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-2" id="APg_1-2"></a>[<a href="images/v1-2.png">2</a>]</span>ed
+her faculties, till, waking by degrees
+to a keen sense of anguish, a
+whirlwind of rage and indignation
+roused her torpid pulse. One recollection
+with frightful velocity following
+another, threatened to fire her brain,
+and make her a fit companion for the
+terrific inhabitants, whose groans and
+shrieks were no unsubstantial sounds of
+whistling winds, or startled birds, modulated
+by a romantic fancy, which
+amuse while they affright; but such
+tones of misery as carry a dreadful certainty
+directly to the heart. What
+effect must they then have produced on
+one, true to the touch of sympathy, and
+tortured by maternal apprehension<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '.!'">!</ins></p>
+
+<p>Her infant's image was continually
+floating on Maria's sight, and the first
+smile of intelligence remembered, as
+none but a mother, an unhappy mo<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-3" id="APg_1-3"></a>[<a href="images/v1-3.png">3</a>]</span>ther,
+can conceive. She heard her half
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads 'speaking half'">speaking</ins> cooing, and felt the little
+twinkling fingers on her burning bosom&mdash;a
+bosom bursting with the nutriment
+for which this cherished child
+might now be pining in vain. From
+a stranger she could indeed receive the
+maternal aliment, Maria was grieved
+at the thought&mdash;but who would watch
+her with a mother's tenderness, a mother's
+self-denial?</p>
+
+<p>The retreating shadows of former
+sorrows rushed back in a gloomy train,
+and seemed to be pictured on the walls
+of her prison, magnified by the state
+of mind in which they were viewed&mdash;Still
+she mourned for her child, lamented
+she was a daughter, and anticipated
+the aggravated ills of life that her sex
+rendered almost inevitable, even while
+dreading she was no more. To think<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-4" id="APg_1-4"></a>[<a href="images/v1-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+that she was blotted out of existence
+was agony, when the imagination had
+been long employed to expand her
+faculties; yet to suppose her turned
+adrift on an unknown sea, was scarcely
+less afflicting.</p>
+
+<p>After being two days the prey of impetuous,
+varying emotions, Maria began
+to reflect more calmly on her present
+situation, for she had actually been rendered
+incapable of sober reflection, by
+the discovery of the act of atrocity of
+which she was the victim. She could
+not have imagined, that, in all the fermentation
+of civilized depravity, a similar
+plot could have entered a human
+mind. She had been stunned by an unexpected
+blow; yet life, however joyless,
+was not to be indolently resigned,
+or misery endured without exertion,
+and proudly termed patience. She<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-5" id="APg_1-5"></a>[<a href="images/v1-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+had hitherto meditated only to point
+the dart of anguish, and suppressed
+the heart heavings of indignant nature
+merely by the force of contempt. Now
+she endeavoured to brace her mind to
+fortitude, and to ask herself what was
+to be her employment in her dreary
+cell? Was it not to effect her escape,
+to fly to the succour of her child, and
+to baffle the selfish schemes of her tyrant&mdash;her
+husband?</p>
+
+<p>These thoughts roused her sleeping
+spirit, and the self-possession returned,
+that seemed to have abandoned her in
+the infernal solitude into which she
+had been precipitated. The first emotions
+of overwhelming impatience began
+to subside, and resentment gave
+place to tenderness, and more tranquil
+meditation; though anger once more
+stopt the calm current of reflection<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '.'">,</ins><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-6" id="APg_1-6"></a>[<a href="images/v1-6.png">6</a>]</span>
+when she attempted to move her manacled
+arms. But this was an outrage
+that could only excite momentary feelings
+of scorn, which evaporated in a
+faint smile; for Maria was far from
+thinking a personal insult the most difficult
+to endure with magnanimous indifference.</p>
+
+<p>She approached the small grated
+window of her chamber, and for a
+considerable time only regarded the
+blue expanse; though it commanded
+a view of a desolate garden, and of
+part of a huge pile of buildings, that,
+after having been suffered, for half a
+century, to fall to decay, had undergone
+some clumsy repairs, merely to
+render it habitable. The ivy had been
+torn off the turrets, and the stones not
+wanted to patch up the breaches of
+time, and exclude the warring ele<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-7" id="APg_1-7"></a>[<a href="images/v1-7.png">7</a>]</span>ments,
+left in heaps in the disordered
+court. Maria contemplated this scene
+she knew not how long; or rather
+gazed on the walls, and pondered on
+her situation. To the master of this
+most horrid of prisons, she had, soon
+after her entrance, raved of injustice,
+in accents that would have justified
+his treatment, had not a malignant
+smile, when she appealed to his judgment,
+with a dreadful conviction stifled
+her remonstrating complaints. By
+force, or openly, what could be done?
+But surely some expedient might occur
+to an active mind, without any other
+employment, and possessed of sufficient
+resolution to put the risk of life into
+the balance with the chance of freedom.</p>
+
+<p>A woman entered in the midst of
+these reflections, with a firm, deliberate<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-8" id="APg_1-8"></a>[<a href="images/v1-8.png">8</a>]</span>
+step, strongly marked features, and
+large black eyes, which she fixed
+steadily on Maria's, as if she designed
+to intimidate her, saying at the same
+time&mdash;"You had better sit down and
+eat your dinner, than look at the
+clouds."</p>
+
+<p>"I have no appetite," replied Maria,
+who had previously determined to
+speak mildly, "why then should I
+eat?"</p>
+
+<p>"But, in spite of that, you must
+and shall eat something. I have had
+many ladies under my care, who have
+resolved to starve themselves; but, soon
+or late, they gave up their intent, as
+they recovered their senses."</p>
+
+<p>"Do you really think me mad?"
+asked Maria, meeting the searching
+glance of her eye.</p>
+
+<p>"Not just now. But what does<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-9" id="APg_1-9"></a>[<a href="images/v1-9.png">9</a>]</span>
+that prove?&mdash;only that you must be
+the more carefully watched, for appearing
+at times so reasonable. You
+have not touched a morsel since you
+entered the house."&mdash;Maria sighed intelligibly.&mdash;"Could
+any thing but madness
+produce such a disgust for food?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, grief; you would not ask
+the question if you knew what it
+was." The attendant shook her head;
+and a ghastly smile of desperate fortitude
+served as a forcible reply, and
+made Maria pause, before she added&mdash;"Yet
+I will take some refreshment:
+I mean not to die.&mdash;No; I will preserve
+my senses; and convince even
+you, sooner than you are aware of,
+that my intellects have never been disturbed,
+though the exertion of them
+may have been suspended by some infernal
+drug."</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-10" id="APg_1-10"></a>[<a href="images/v1-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+Doubt gathered still thicker on the
+brow of her guard, as she attempted
+to convict her of mistake.</p>
+
+<p>"Have patience!" exclaimed Maria,
+with a solemnity that inspired awe.
+"My God! how have I been schooled
+into the practice!" A suffocation of
+voice betrayed the agonizing emotions
+she was labouring to keep down; and
+conquering a qualm of disgust, she
+calmly endeavoured to eat enough to
+prove her docility, perpetually turning
+to the suspicious female, whose observation
+she courted, while she was
+making the bed and adjusting the
+room.</p>
+
+<p>"Come to me often," said Maria,
+with a tone of persuasion, in consequence
+of a vague plan that she had
+hastily adopted, when, after surveying
+this woman's form and features, she<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-11" id="APg_1-11"></a>[<a href="images/v1-11.png">11</a>]</span>
+felt convinced that she had an understanding
+above the common standard;
+"and believe me mad, till you are
+obliged to acknowledge the contrary."
+The woman was no fool, that is, she
+was superior to her class; nor had
+misery quite petrified the life's-blood
+of humanity, to which reflections on
+our own misfortunes only give a more
+orderly course. The manner, rather
+than the expostulations, of Maria
+made a slight suspicion dart into her
+mind with corresponding sympathy,
+which various other avocations, and
+the habit of banishing compunction,
+prevented her, for the present, from
+examining more minutely.</p>
+
+<p>But when she was told that no person,
+excepting the physician appointed by
+her family, was to be permitted to see
+the lady at the end of the gallery, she<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-12" id="APg_1-12"></a>[<a href="images/v1-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+opened her keen eyes still wider, and
+uttered a&mdash;"hem!" before she enquired&mdash;"Why?"
+She was briefly told, in
+reply, that the malady was hereditary,
+and the fits not occurring but at very
+long and irregular intervals, she must
+be carefully watched; for the length of
+these lucid periods only rendered her
+more mischievous, when any vexation
+or caprice brought on the paroxysm of
+phrensy.</p>
+
+<p>Had her master trusted her, it is
+probable that neither pity nor curiosity
+would have made her swerve from the
+straight line of her interest; for she
+had suffered too much in her intercourse
+with mankind, not to determine
+to look for support, rather to humouring
+their passions, than courting
+their approbation by the integrity of
+her conduct. A deadly blight had met<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-13" id="APg_1-13"></a>[<a href="images/v1-13.png">13</a>]</span>
+her at the very threshold of existence;
+and the wretchedness of her mother
+seemed a heavy weight fastened on her
+innocent neck, to drag her down to
+perdition. She could not heroically
+determine to succour an unfortunate;
+but, offended at the bare supposition
+that she could be deceived with the
+same ease as a common servant, she
+no longer curbed her curiosity; and,
+though she never seriously fathomed
+her own intentions, she would sit, every
+moment she could steal from observation,
+listening to the tale, which Maria
+was eager to relate with all the persuasive
+eloquence of grief.</p>
+
+<p>It is so cheering to see a human
+face, even if little of the divinity of
+virtue beam in it, that Maria anxiously
+expected the return of the attendant,
+as of a gleam of light to break the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-14" id="APg_1-14"></a>[<a href="images/v1-14.png">14</a>]</span>
+gloom of idleness. Indulged sorrow;
+she perceived, must blunt or sharpen
+the faculties to the two opposite extremes;
+producing stupidity, the moping
+melancholy of indolence; or the
+restless activity of a disturbed imagination.
+She sunk into one state, after
+being fatigued by the other: till the
+want of occupation became even more
+painful than the actual pressure or apprehension
+of sorrow; and the confinement
+that froze her into a nook of
+existence, with an unvaried prospect
+before her, the most insupportable of
+evils. The lamp of life seemed to be
+spending itself to chase the vapours of
+a dungeon which no art could dissipate.&mdash;And
+to what purpose did she
+rally all her energy?&mdash;Was not the
+world a vast prison, and women born
+slaves?</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-15" id="APg_1-15"></a>[<a href="images/v1-15.png">15</a>]</span>
+Though she failed immediately to
+rouse a lively sense of injustice in the
+mind of her guard, because it had
+been sophisticated into misanthropy,
+she touched her heart. Jemima (she
+had only a claim to a Christian name,
+which had not procured her any Christian
+privileges) could patiently hear of
+Maria's confinement on false pretences;
+she had felt the crushing hand of
+power, hardened by the exercise of
+injustice, and ceased to wonder at the
+perversions of the understanding, which
+systematize oppression; but, when told
+that her child, only four months old,
+had been torn from her, even while
+she was discharging the tenderest maternal
+office, the woman awoke in a
+bosom long estranged from feminine
+emotions, and Jemima determined to
+alleviate all in her power, without ha<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-16" id="APg_1-16"></a>[<a href="images/v1-16.png">16</a>]</span>zarding
+the loss of her place, the sufferings
+of a wretched mother, apparently
+injured, and certainly unhappy.
+A sense of right seems to result from
+the simplest act of reason, and to preside
+over the faculties of the mind,
+like the master-sense of feeling, to
+rectify the rest; but (for the comparison
+may be carried still farther) how
+often is the exquisite sensibility of
+both weakened or destroyed by the
+vulgar occupations, and ignoble pleasures
+of life?</p>
+
+<p>The preserving her situation was,
+indeed, an important object to Jemima,
+who had been hunted from hole
+to hole, as if she had been a beast of
+prey, or infected with a moral plague.
+The wages she received, the greater
+part of which she hoarded, as her only
+chance for independence, were much<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-17" id="APg_1-17"></a>[<a href="images/v1-17.png">17</a>]</span>
+more considerable than she could reckon
+on obtaining any where else, were
+it possible that she, an outcast from
+society, could be permitted to earn a
+subsistence in a reputable family. Hearing
+Maria perpetually complain of listlessness,
+and the not being able to beguile
+grief by resuming her customary
+pursuits, she was easily prevailed on,
+by compassion, and that involuntary
+respect for abilities, which those who
+possess them can never eradicate, to
+bring her some books and implements
+for writing. Maria's conversation had
+amused and interested her, and the natural
+consequence was a desire, scarcely
+observed by herself, of obtaining the
+esteem of a person she admired. The
+remembrance of better days was rendered
+more lively; and the sentiments
+then acquired appearing less romantic<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-18" id="APg_1-18"></a>[<a href="images/v1-18.png">18</a>]</span>
+than they had for a long period, a
+spark of hope roused her mind to new
+activity.</p>
+
+<p>How grateful was her attention to
+Maria! Oppressed by a dead weight
+of existence, or preyed on by the
+gnawing worm of discontent, with
+what eagerness did she endeavour to
+shorten the long days, which left no
+traces behind! She seemed to be
+sailing on the vast ocean of life, without
+seeing any land-mark to indicate
+the progress of time; to find employment
+was then to find variety, the
+animating principle of nature.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-19" id="APg_1-19"></a>[<a href="images/v1-19.png">19</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_II" id="ACHAP_II"></a>CHAP. II.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Earnestly</span> as Maria endeavoured
+to soothe, by reading, the anguish
+of her wounded mind, her thoughts
+would often wander from the subject
+she was led to discuss, and tears of
+maternal tenderness obscured the reasoning
+page. She descanted on "the
+ills which flesh is heir to," with bitterness,
+when the recollection of her
+babe was revived by a tale of fictitious
+woe, that bore any resemblance to her
+own; and her imagination was continually
+employed, to conjure up and
+embody the various phantoms of misery,
+which folly and vice had let loose
+on the world. The loss of her babe
+was the tender string; against other
+cruel remembrances she laboured to<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-20" id="APg_1-20"></a>[<a href="images/v1-20.png">20</a>]</span>
+steel her bosom; and even a ray of
+hope, in the midst of her gloomy reveries,
+would sometimes gleam on the
+dark horizon of futurity, while persuading
+herself that she ought to cease
+to hope, since happiness was no where
+to be found.&mdash;But of her child, debilitated
+by the grief with which its
+mother had been assailed before it saw
+the light, she could not think without
+an impatient struggle.</p>
+
+<p>"I, alone, by my active tenderness,
+could have saved," she would exclaim,
+"from an early blight, this sweet
+blossom; and, cherishing it, I should
+have had something still to love."</p>
+
+<p>In proportion as other expectations
+were torn from her, this tender one
+had been fondly clung to, and knit
+into her heart.</p>
+
+<p>The books she had obtained, were<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-21" id="APg_1-21"></a>[<a href="images/v1-21.png">21</a>]</span>
+soon devoured, by one who had no
+other resource to escape from sorrow,
+and the feverish dreams of ideal wretchedness
+or felicity, which equally weaken
+the intoxicated sensibility. Writing
+was then the only alternative, and
+she wrote some rhapsodies descriptive
+of the state of her mind; but the
+events of her past life pressing on her,
+she resolved circumstantially to relate
+them, with the sentiments that experience,
+and more matured reason,
+would naturally suggest. They might
+perhaps instruct her daughter, and
+shield her from the misery, the tyranny,
+her mother knew not how to avoid.</p>
+
+<p>This thought gave life to her diction,
+her soul flowed into it, and she soon
+found the task of recollecting almost
+obliterated impressions very interesting.
+She lived again in the revived emo<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-22" id="APg_1-22"></a>[<a href="images/v1-22.png">22</a>]</span>tions
+of youth, and forgot her present
+in the retrospect of sorrows that had
+assumed an unalterable character.</p>
+
+<p>Though this employment lightened
+the weight of time, yet, never losing
+sight of her main object, Maria did
+not allow any opportunity to slip of
+winning on the affections of Jemima;
+for she discovered in her a strength of
+mind, that excited her esteem, clouded
+as it was by the misanthropy of despair.</p>
+
+<p>An insulated being, from the misfortune
+of her birth, she despised and
+preyed on the society by which she
+had been oppressed, and loved not her
+fellow-creatures, because she had never
+been beloved. No mother had ever
+fondled her, no father or brother had
+protected her from outrage; and the
+man who had plunged her into in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-23" id="APg_1-23"></a>[<a href="images/v1-23.png">23</a>]</span>famy,
+and deserted her when she stood
+in greatest need of support, deigned
+not to smooth with kindness the road
+to ruin. Thus degraded, was she let
+loose on the world; and virtue, never
+nurtured by affection, assumed the stern
+aspect of selfish independence.</p>
+
+<p>This general view of her life, Maria
+gathered from her exclamations and
+dry remarks. Jemima indeed displayed
+a strange mixture of interest
+and suspicion; for she would listen to
+her with earnestness, and then suddenly
+interrupt the conversation, as if
+afraid of resigning, by giving way to
+her sympathy, her dear-bought knowledge
+of the world.</p>
+
+<p>Maria alluded to the possibility of
+an escape, and mentioned a compensation,
+or reward; but the style in which
+she was repulsed made her cautious,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-24" id="APg_1-24"></a>[<a href="images/v1-24.png">24</a>]</span>
+and determine not to renew the subject,
+till she knew more of the character
+she had to work on. Jemima's
+countenance, and dark hints, seemed
+to say, "You are an extraordinary
+woman; but let me consider, this may
+only be one of your lucid intervals."
+Nay, the very energy of Maria's character,
+made her suspect that the extraordinary
+animation she perceived
+might be the effect of madness. "Should
+her husband then substantiate his
+charge, and get possession of her estate,
+from whence would come the promised
+annuity, or more desired protection?
+Besides, might not a woman, anxious
+to escape, conceal some of the circumstances
+which made against her? Was
+truth to be expected from one who
+had been entrapped, kidnapped, in
+the most fraudulent manner?"</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-25" id="APg_1-25"></a>[<a href="images/v1-25.png">25</a>]</span>
+In this train Jemima continued to
+argue, the moment after compassion
+and respect seemed to make her swerve;
+and she still resolved not to be wrought
+on to do more than soften the rigour
+of confinement, till she could advance
+on surer ground.</p>
+
+<p>Maria was not permitted to walk in
+the garden; but sometimes, from her
+window, she turned her eyes from the
+gloomy walls, in which she pined life
+away, on the poor wretches who strayed
+along the walks, and contemplated
+the most terrific of ruins&mdash;that of a
+human soul. What is the view of the
+fallen column, the mouldering arch, of
+the most exquisite workmanship, when
+compared with this living memento of
+the fragility, the instability, of reason,
+and the wild luxuriancy of noxious
+passions? Enthusiasm turned adrift,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-26" id="APg_1-26"></a>[<a href="images/v1-26.png">26</a>]</span>
+like some rich stream overflowing its
+banks, rushes forward with destructive
+velocity, inspiring a sublime concentration
+of thought. Thus thought
+Maria&mdash;These are the ravages over
+which humanity must ever mournfully
+ponder, with a degree of anguish not
+excited by crumbling marble, or cankering
+brass, unfaithful to the trust of
+monumental fame. It is not over the
+decaying productions of the mind, embodied
+with the happiest art, we grieve
+most bitterly. The view of what has
+been done by man, produces a melancholy,
+yet aggrandizing, sense of what
+remains to be achieved by human intellect;
+but a mental convulsion, which,
+like the devastation of an earthquake,
+throws all the elements of thought and
+imagination into confusion, makes con<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-27" id="APg_1-27"></a>[<a href="images/v1-27.png">27</a>]</span>templation
+giddy, and we fearfully ask
+on what ground we ourselves stand.</p>
+
+<p>Melancholy and imbecility marked
+the features of the wretches allowed to
+breathe at large; for the frantic, those
+who in a strong imagination had lost a
+sense of woe, were closely confined.
+The playful tricks and mischievous devices
+of their disturbed fancy, that suddenly
+broke out, could not be guarded
+against, when they were permitted to
+enjoy any portion of freedom; for,
+so active was their imagination, that
+every new object which accidentally
+struck their senses, awoke to phrenzy
+their restless passions; as Maria learned
+from the burden of their incessant
+ravings.</p>
+
+<p>Sometimes, with a strict injunction
+of silence, Jemima would allow Maria,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-28" id="APg_1-28"></a>[<a href="images/v1-28.png">28</a>]</span>
+at the close of evening, to stray along
+the narrow avenues that separated the
+dungeon-like apartments, leaning on
+her arm. What a change of scene!
+Maria wished to pass the threshold of
+her prison, yet, when by chance she
+met the eye of rage glaring on her, yet
+unfaithful to its office, she shrunk back
+with more horror and affright, than if
+she had stumbled over a mangled corpse.
+Her busy fancy pictured the misery of a
+fond heart, watching over a friend thus
+estranged, absent, though present&mdash;over
+a poor wretch lost to reason and the
+social joys of existence; and losing all
+consciousness of misery in its excess.
+What a task, to watch the light of reason
+quivering in the eye, or with agonizing
+expectation to catch the beam of recollection;
+tantalized by hope, only to
+feel despair more keenly, at finding a<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-29" id="APg_1-29"></a>[<a href="images/v1-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+much loved face or voice, suddenly remembered,
+or pathetically implored,
+only to be immediately forgotten, or
+viewed with indifference or abhorrence!</p>
+
+<p>The heart-rending sigh of melancholy
+sunk into her soul; and when she retired
+to rest, the petrified figures she
+had encountered, the only human forms
+she was doomed to observe, haunting
+her dreams with tales of mysterious
+wrongs, made her wish to sleep to dream
+no more.</p>
+
+<p>Day after day rolled away, and tedious
+as the present moment appeared,
+they passed in such an unvaried tenor,
+Maria was surprised to find that she
+had already been six weeks buried alive,
+and yet had such faint hopes of effecting
+her enlargement. She was, earnestly
+as she had sought for employment,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-30" id="APg_1-30"></a>[<a href="images/v1-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+now angry with herself for having been
+amused by writing her narrative; and
+grieved to think that she had for an instant
+thought of any thing, but contriving
+to escape.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima had evidently pleasure in
+her society: still, though she often left
+her with a glow of kindness, she returned
+with the same chilling air; and,
+when her heart appeared for a moment
+to open, some suggestion of reason forcibly
+closed it, before she could give
+utterance to the confidence Maria's
+conversation inspired.</p>
+
+<p>Discouraged by these changes, Maria
+relapsed into despondency, when she
+was cheered by the alacrity with which
+Jemima brought her a fresh parcel of
+books; assuring her, that she had taken
+some pains to obtain them from one of
+the keepers, who attended a gentle<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-31" id="APg_1-31"></a>[<a href="images/v1-31.png">31</a>]</span>man
+confined in the opposite corner of
+the gallery.</p>
+
+<p>Maria took up the books with emotion.
+"They come," said she, "perhaps,
+from a wretch condemned, like
+me, to reason on the nature of madness,
+by having wrecked minds continually
+under his eye; and almost to wish himself&mdash;as
+I do&mdash;mad, to escape from the
+contemplation of it." Her heart throbbed
+with sympathetic alarm; and she
+turned over the leaves with awe, as if
+they had become sacred from passing
+through the hands of an unfortunate
+being, oppressed by a similar fate.</p>
+
+<p>Dryden's Fables, Milton's Paradise
+Lost, with several modern productions,
+composed the collection. It was a
+mine of treasure. Some marginal notes,
+in Dryden's Fables, caught her attention:
+they were written with force<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-32" id="APg_1-32"></a>[<a href="images/v1-32.png">32</a>]</span>
+and taste; and, in one of the modern
+pamphlets, there was a fragment left,
+containing various observations on the
+present state of society and government,
+with a comparative view of the
+politics of Europe and America. These
+remarks were written with a degree of
+generous warmth, when alluding to the
+enslaved state of the labouring majority,
+perfectly in unison with Maria's mode
+of thinking.</p>
+
+<p>She read them over and over again;
+and fancy, treacherous fancy, began to
+sketch a character, congenial with her
+own, from these shadowy outlines.&mdash;"Was
+he mad?" She re-perused the
+marginal notes, and they seemed the
+production of an animated, but not of a
+disturbed imagination. Confined to
+this speculation, every time she re-read
+them, some fresh refinement of<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-33" id="APg_1-33"></a>[<a href="images/v1-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+sentiment, or <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'accuteness'">acuteness</ins> of thought
+impressed her, which she was astonished
+at herself for not having before observed.</p>
+
+<p>What a creative power has an affectionate
+heart! There are beings who
+cannot live without loving, as poets
+love; and who feel the electric spark
+of genius, wherever it awakens sentiment
+or grace. Maria had often thought,
+when disciplining her wayward heart,
+"that to charm, was to be virtuous."
+"They who make me wish to appear
+the most amiable and good in their eyes,
+must possess in a degree," she would
+exclaim, "the graces and virtues they
+call into action."</p>
+
+<p>She took up a book on the powers of
+the human mind; but, her attention
+strayed from cold arguments on the
+nature of what she felt, while she was<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-34" id="APg_1-34"></a>[<a href="images/v1-34.png">34</a>]</span>
+feeling, and she snapt the chain of the
+theory to read Dryden's Guiscard and
+Sigismunda.</p>
+
+<p>Maria, in the course of the ensuing
+day, returned some of the books, with
+the hope of getting others&mdash;and more
+marginal notes. Thus shut out from
+human intercourse, and compelled to
+view nothing but the prison of vexed
+spirits, to meet a wretch in the same
+situation, was more surely to find a
+friend, than to imagine a countryman
+one, in a strange land, where the human
+voice conveys no information to
+the eager ear.</p>
+
+<p>"Did you ever see the unfortunate
+being to whom these books belong?"
+asked Maria, when Jemima brought
+her supper. "Yes. He sometimes
+walks out, between five and six, before
+the family is stirring, in the morning,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-35" id="APg_1-35"></a>[<a href="images/v1-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+with two keepers; but even then his
+hands are confined."</p>
+
+<p>"What! is he so unruly?" enquired
+Maria, with an accent of disappointment.</p>
+
+<p>"No, not that I perceive," replied
+Jemima; "but he has an untamed
+look, a vehemence of eye, that excites
+apprehension. Were his hands free,
+he looks as if he could soon manage
+both his guards: yet he appears
+tranquil."</p>
+
+<p>"If he be so strong, he must be
+young," observed Maria.</p>
+
+<p>"Three or four and thirty, I suppose;
+but there is no judging of a
+person in his situation."</p>
+
+<p>"Are you sure that he is mad?"
+interrupted Maria with eagerness. Jemima
+quitted the room, without replying.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-36" id="APg_1-36"></a>[<a href="images/v1-36.png">36</a>]</span>
+"No, no, he certainly is not!" exclaimed
+Maria, answering herself;
+"the man who could write those observations
+was not disordered in his
+intellects."</p>
+
+<p>She sat musing, gazing at the moon,
+and watching its motion as it seemed
+to glide under the clouds. Then, preparing
+for bed, she thought, "Of
+what use could I be to him, or he to
+me, if it be true that he is unjustly
+confined?&mdash;Could he aid me to escape,
+who is himself more closely watched?&mdash;Still
+I should like to see him." She
+went to bed, dreamed of her child,
+yet woke exactly at half after five
+o'clock, and starting up, only wrapped
+a gown around her, and ran to the
+window. The morning was chill, it
+was the latter end of September; yet
+she did not retire to warm herself and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-37" id="APg_1-37"></a>[<a href="images/v1-37.png">37</a>]</span>
+think in bed, till the sound of the
+servants, moving about the house, convinced
+her that the unknown would
+not walk in the garden that morning.
+She was ashamed at feeling disappointed;
+and began to reflect, as an excuse
+to herself, on the little objects which
+attract attention when there is nothing
+to divert the mind; and how difficult
+it was for women to avoid growing
+romantic, who have no active duties
+or pursuits.</p>
+
+<p>At breakfast, Jemima enquired whether
+she understood French? for, unless
+she did, the stranger's stock of
+books was exhausted. Maria replied
+in the affirmative; but forbore to ask
+any more questions respecting the person
+to whom they belonged. And Jemima
+gave her a new subject for contemplation,
+by describing the person<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-38" id="APg_1-38"></a>[<a href="images/v1-38.png">38</a>]</span>
+of a lovely maniac, just brought into
+an adjoining chamber. She was singing
+the pathetic ballad of old Rob &ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;
+with the most heart-melting
+falls and pauses. Jemima had half-opened
+the door, when she distinguished
+her voice, and Maria stood close to it,
+scarcely daring to respire, lest a modulation
+should escape her, so exquisitely
+sweet, so passionately wild. She
+began with sympathy to pourtray to
+herself another victim, when the lovely
+warbler flew, as it were, from the
+spray, and a torrent of unconnected
+exclamations and questions burst from
+her, interrupted by fits of laughter, so
+horrid, that Maria shut the door, and,
+turning her eyes up to heaven, exclaimed&mdash;"Gracious
+God!"</p>
+
+<p>Several minutes elapsed before Maria
+could enquire respecting the ru<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-39" id="APg_1-39"></a>[<a href="images/v1-39.png">39</a>]</span>mour
+of the house (for this poor
+wretch was obviously not confined
+without a cause); and then Jemima
+could only tell her, that it was said,
+"she had been married, against her
+inclination, to a rich old man, extremely
+jealous (no wonder, for she
+was a charming creature); and that,
+in consequence of his treatment, or
+something which hung on her mind,
+she had, during her first lying-in, lost
+her senses."</p>
+
+<p>What a subject of meditation&mdash;even
+to the very confines of madness.</p>
+
+<p>"Woman, fragile flower! why
+were you suffered to adorn a world
+exposed to the inroad of such stormy
+elements?" thought Maria, while the
+poor maniac's strain was still breathing
+on her ear, and sinking into her very
+soul.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-40" id="APg_1-40"></a>[<a href="images/v1-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+Towards the evening, Jemima brought
+her Rousseau's <i>Helo&iuml;se</i>; and she sat
+reading with eyes and heart, till the
+return of her guard to extinguish the
+light. One instance of her kindness
+was, the permitting Maria to have
+one, till her own hour of retiring to
+rest. She had read this work long
+since; but now it seemed to open a
+new world to her&mdash;the only one worth
+inhabiting. Sleep was not to be
+wooed; yet, far from being fatigued
+by the restless rotation of thought, she
+rose and opened her window, just as
+the thin watery clouds of twilight
+made the long silent shadows visible.
+The air swept across her face with a
+voluptuous freshness that thrilled to
+her heart, awakening indefinable emotions;
+and the sound of a waving
+branch, or the twittering of a startled<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-41" id="APg_1-41"></a>[<a href="images/v1-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+bird, alone broke the stillness of reposing
+nature. Absorbed by the sublime
+sensibility which renders the consciousness
+of existence felicity, Maria
+was happy, till an autumnal scent,
+wafted by the breeze of morn from
+the fallen leaves of the adjacent wood,
+made her recollect that the season had
+changed since her confinement; yet
+life afforded no variety to solace an
+afflicted heart. She returned dispirited
+to her couch, and thought of her child
+till the broad glare of day again invited
+her to the window. She looked
+not for the unknown, still how great
+was her vexation at perceiving the
+back of a man, certainly he, with his
+two attendants, as he turned into a
+side-path which led to the house! A
+confused recollection of having seen
+somebody who resembled him, imme<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-42" id="APg_1-42"></a>[<a href="images/v1-42.png">42</a>]</span>diately
+occurred, to puzzle and torment
+her with endless conjectures. Five
+minutes sooner, and she should have
+seen his face, and been out of suspense&mdash;was
+ever any thing so unlucky!
+His steady, bold step, and the whole
+air of his person, bursting as it were
+from a cloud, pleased her, and gave
+an outline to the imagination to sketch
+the individual form she wished to recognize.</p>
+
+<p>Feeling the disappointment more
+severely than she was willing to believe,
+she flew to Rousseau, as her
+only refuge from the idea of him, who
+might prove a friend, could she but
+find a way to interest him in her fate;
+still the personification of Saint Preux,
+or of an ideal lover far superior, was
+after this imperfect model, of which
+merely a glance had been caught,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-43" id="APg_1-43"></a>[<a href="images/v1-43.png">43</a>]</span>
+even to the minuti&aelig; of the coat and
+hat of the stranger. But if she lent
+St. Preux, or the demi-god of her
+fancy, his form, she richly repaid him
+by the donation of all St. Preux's
+sentiments and feelings, culled to gratify
+her own, to which he seemed to
+have an undoubted right, when she
+read on the margin of an impassioned
+letter, written in the well-known hand&mdash;"Rousseau
+alone, the true Prometheus
+of sentiment, possessed the fire
+of genius necessary to pourtray the
+passion, the truth of which goes so
+directly to the heart."</p>
+
+<p>Maria was again true to the hour, yet
+had finished Rousseau, and begun to
+transcribe some selected passages; unable
+to quit either the author or the window,
+before she had a glimpse of the
+countenance she daily longed to see;<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-44" id="APg_1-44"></a>[<a href="images/v1-44.png">44</a>]</span>
+and, when seen, it conveyed no distinct
+idea to her mind where she had
+seen it before. He must have been a
+transient acquaintance; but to discover
+an acquaintance was fortunate, could
+she contrive to attract his attention,
+and excite his sympathy.</p>
+
+<p>Every glance afforded colouring for
+the picture she was delineating on her
+heart; and once, when the window
+was half open, the sound of his voice
+reached her. Conviction flashed on
+her; she had certainly, in a moment
+of distress, heard the same accents.
+They were manly, and characteristic
+of a noble mind; nay, even sweet&mdash;or
+sweet they seemed to her attentive
+ear.</p>
+
+<p>She started back, trembling, alarmed
+at the emotion a strange coincidence
+of circumstances inspired, and wonder<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-45" id="APg_1-45"></a>[<a href="images/v1-45.png">45</a>]</span>ing
+why she thought so much of a
+stranger, obliged as she had been by
+his timely interference; [for she recollected,
+by degrees, all the circumstances
+of their former meeting.] She
+found however that she could think
+of nothing else; or, if she thought of
+her daughter, it was to wish that she
+had a father whom her mother could
+respect and love.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-46" id="APg_1-46"></a>[<a href="images/v1-46.png">46</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_III" id="ACHAP_III"></a>CHAP. III.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> perusing the first parcel of
+books, Maria had, with her pencil, written
+in one of them a few exclamations,
+expressive of compassion and sympathy,
+which she scarcely remembered, till
+turning over the leaves of one of the
+volumes, lately brought to her, a slip
+of paper dropped out, which Jemima
+hastily snatched up.</p>
+
+<p>"Let me see it," demanded Maria
+impatiently, "You surely are not
+afraid of trusting me with the effusions
+of a madman?" "I must consider," replied
+Jemima; and withdrew, with
+the paper in her hand.</p>
+
+<p>In a life of such seclusion, the passions
+gain undue force; Maria therefore
+felt a great degree of resentment and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-47" id="APg_1-47"></a>[<a href="images/v1-47.png">47</a>]</span>
+vexation, which she had not time to
+subdue, before Jemima, returning, delivered
+the paper.</p>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p>"Whoever you are, who partake of
+my fate, accept my sincere commiseration&mdash;I
+would have said protection;
+but the privilege of man is denied me.</p>
+
+<p>"My own situation forces a dreadful
+suspicion on my mind&mdash;I may not always
+languish in vain for freedom&mdash;say
+are you&mdash;I cannot ask the question;
+yet I will remember you when my remembrance
+can be of any use. I will
+enquire, <i>why</i> you are so mysteriously
+detained&mdash;and I <i>will</i> have an answer.</p>
+
+<p class="right">"<span class="smcap">henry darnford</span>."</p></div>
+
+<p>By the most pressing intreaties, Maria
+prevailed on Jemima to permit her to
+write a reply to this note. Another<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-48" id="APg_1-48"></a>[<a href="images/v1-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+and another succeeded, in which explanations
+were not allowed relative to
+their present situation; but Maria, with
+sufficient explicitness, alluded to a former
+obligation; and they insensibly entered
+on an interchange of sentiments
+on the most important subjects. To
+write these letters was the business of
+the day, and to receive them the moment
+of sunshine. By some means,
+Darnford having discovered Maria's
+window, when she next appeared at
+it, he made her, behind his keepers, a
+profound bow of respect and recognition.</p>
+
+<p>Two or three weeks glided away in
+this kind of intercourse, during which
+period Jemima, to whom Maria had
+given the necessary information respecting
+her family, had evidently gained
+some intelligence, which increased her<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-49" id="APg_1-49"></a>[<a href="images/v1-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+desire of pleasing her charge, though
+she could not yet determine to liberate
+her. Maria took advantage of this
+favourable charge, without too minutely
+enquiring into the cause; and such
+was her eagerness to hold human converse,
+and to see her former protector,
+still a stranger to her, that she incessantly
+requested her guard to gratify her more
+than curiosity.</p>
+
+<p>Writing to Darnford, she was led
+from the sad objects before her, and
+frequently rendered insensible to the
+horrid noises around her, which previously
+had continually employed her
+feverish fancy. Thinking it selfish to
+dwell on her own sufferings, when in
+the midst of wretches, who had not
+only lost all that endears life, but their
+very selves, her imagination was oc<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-50" id="APg_1-50"></a>[<a href="images/v1-50.png">50</a>]</span>cupied
+with melancholy earnestness to
+trace the mazes of misery, through
+which so many wretches must have
+passed to this gloomy receptacle of disjointed
+souls, to the grand source of
+human corruption. Often at midnight
+was she waked by the dismal shrieks of
+demoniac rage, or of excruciating despair,
+uttered in such wild tones of indescribable
+anguish as proved the total
+absence of reason, and roused phantoms
+of horror in her mind, far more
+terrific than all that dreaming superstition
+ever drew. Besides, there was
+frequently something so inconceivably
+picturesque in the varying gestures of
+unrestrained passion, so irresistibly comic
+in their sallies, or so heart-piercingly
+pathetic in the little airs they would
+sing, frequently bursting out after an
+awful silence, as to fascinate the at<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-51" id="APg_1-51"></a>[<a href="images/v1-51.png">51</a>]</span>tention,
+and amuse the fancy, while
+torturing the soul. It was the uproar
+of the passions which she was compelled
+to observe; and to mark the
+lucid beam of reason, like a light
+trembling in a socket, or like the
+flash which divides the threatening
+clouds of angry heaven only to display
+the horrors which darkness shrouded.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima would labour to beguile the
+tedious evenings, by describing the
+persons and manners of the <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'unfortutunate'">unfortunate</ins>
+beings, whose figures or voices
+awoke sympathetic sorrow in Maria's
+bosom; and the stories she told were
+the more interesting, for perpetually
+leaving room to conjecture something
+extraordinary. Still Maria, accustomed
+to generalize her observations, was
+led to conclude from all she heard,
+that it was a vulgar error to suppose<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-52" id="APg_1-52"></a>[<a href="images/v1-52.png">52</a>]</span>
+that people of abilities were the most
+apt to lose the command of reason.
+On the contrary, from most of the instances
+she could investigate, she thought
+it resulted, that the passions only appeared
+strong and disproportioned, because
+the judgment was weak and unexercised;
+and that they gained strength
+by the decay of reason, as the shadows
+lengthen during the sun's decline.</p>
+
+<p>Maria impatiently wished to see her
+fellow-sufferer; but Darnford was still
+more earnest to obtain an interview.
+Accustomed to submit to every impulse
+of passion, and never taught, like
+women, to restrain the most natural,
+and acquire, instead of the bewitching
+frankness of nature, a factitious propriety
+of behaviour, every desire became
+a torrent that bore down all opposition.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-53" id="APg_1-53"></a>[<a href="images/v1-53.png">53</a>]</span>
+His travelling trunk, which contained
+the books lent to Maria, had
+been sent to him, and with a part of
+its contents he bribed his principal
+keeper; who, after receiving the most
+solemn promise that he would return
+to his apartment without attempting
+to explore any part of the house, conducted
+him, in the dusk of the evening,
+to Maria's room.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima had apprized her charge of
+the visit, and she expected with trembling
+impatience, inspired by a vague
+hope that he might again prove her
+deliverer, to see a man who had before
+rescued her from oppression. He entered
+with an animation of countenance,
+formed to captivate an enthusiast;
+and, hastily turned his eyes from
+her to the apartment, which he surveyed
+with apparent emotions of com<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-54" id="APg_1-54"></a>[<a href="images/v1-54.png">54</a>]</span>passionate
+indignation. Sympathy illuminated
+his eye, and, taking her hand,
+he respectfully bowed on it, exclaiming&mdash;"This
+is extraordinary!&mdash;again
+to meet you, and in such circumstances!"
+Still, impressive as was the
+coincidence of events which brought
+them once more together, their full
+hearts did not overflow.&mdash;<a name="AFNanchor_54-A_3" id="AFNanchor_54-A_3"></a><a href="#AFootnote_54-A_3" class="fnanchor">[54-A]</a></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>[And though, after this first visit,
+they were permitted frequently to repeat
+their interviews, they were for
+some time employed in] a reserved
+conversation, to which all the world<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-55" id="APg_1-55"></a>[<a href="images/v1-55.png">55</a>]</span>
+might have listened; excepting, when
+discussing some literary subject, flashes
+of sentiment, inforced by each relaxing
+feature, seemed to remind them
+that their minds were already acquainted.</p>
+
+<p>[By degrees, Darnford entered into
+the particulars of his story.] In a few
+words, he informed her that he had been
+a thoughtless, extravagant young man;
+yet, as he described his faults, they appeared
+to be the generous luxuriancy of
+a noble mind. Nothing like meanness
+tarnished the lustre of his youth, nor had
+the worm of selfishness lurked in the unfolding
+bud, even while he had been the
+dupe of others. Yet he tardily acquired
+the experience necessary to guard
+him against future imposition.</p>
+
+<p>"I shall weary you," continued he,
+"by my egotism; and did not power<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-56" id="APg_1-56"></a>[<a href="images/v1-56.png">56</a>]</span>ful
+emotions draw me to you,"&mdash;his
+eyes glistened as he spoke, and a trembling
+seemed to run through his manly
+frame,&mdash;"I would not waste these precious
+moments in talking of myself.</p>
+
+<p>"My father and mother were people
+of fashion; married by their parents. He
+was fond of the turf, she of the card-table.
+I, and two or three other children
+since dead, were kept at home
+till we became intolerable. My father
+and mother had a visible dislike
+to each other, continually displayed;
+the servants were of the depraved kind
+usually found in the houses of people
+of fortune. My brothers and parents
+all dying, I was left to the care of
+guardians, and sent to Eton. I never
+knew the sweets of domestic affection,
+but I felt the want of indulgence and
+frivolous respect at school. I will not<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-57" id="APg_1-57"></a>[<a href="images/v1-57.png">57</a>]</span>
+disgust you with a recital of the vices
+of my youth, which can scarcely be comprehended
+by female delicacy. I was
+taught to love by a creature I am
+ashamed to mention; and the other
+women with whom I afterwards became
+intimate, were of a class of which
+you can have no knowledge. I formed
+my acquaintance with them at the
+theatres; and, when vivacity danced
+in their eyes, I was not easily disgusted
+by the vulgarity which flowed from
+their lips. Having spent, a few years
+after I was of age, [the whole of] a
+considerable patrimony, excepting a
+few hundreds, I had no <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'resource'">recourse</ins> but
+to purchase a commission in a new-raised
+regiment, destined to subjugate
+America. The regret I felt to renounce
+a life of pleasure, was counter-balanced
+by the curiosity I had to see<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-58" id="APg_1-58"></a>[<a href="images/v1-58.png">58</a>]</span>
+America, or rather to travel; [nor
+had any of those circumstances occurred
+to my youth, which might have
+been calculated] to bind my country
+to my heart. I shall not trouble you
+with the details of a military life. My
+blood was still kept in motion; till,
+towards the close of the contest, I was
+wounded and taken prisoner.</p>
+
+<p>"Confined to my bed, or chair, by a
+lingering cure, my only refuge from
+the preying activity of my mind, was
+books, which I read with great avidity,
+profiting by the conversation of my
+host, a man of sound understanding.
+My political sentiments now underwent
+a total change; and, dazzled by
+the hospitality of the Americans, I
+determined to take up my abode with
+freedom. I, therefore, with my usual
+impetuosity, sold my commission, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-59" id="APg_1-59"></a>[<a href="images/v1-59.png">59</a>]</span>
+travelled into the interior parts of the
+country, to lay out my money to advantage.
+Added to this, I did not
+much like the puritanical manners of
+the large towns. Inequality of condition
+was there most disgustingly galling.
+The only pleasure wealth afforded,
+was to make an ostentatious
+display of it; for the cultivation of
+the fine arts, or literature, had not introduced
+into the first circles that polish
+of manners which renders the rich so essentially
+superior to the poor in Europe.
+Added to this, an influx of vices had
+been let in by the Revolution, and the
+most rigid principles of religion shaken
+to the centre, before the understanding
+could be gradually emancipated from
+the prejudices which led their ancestors
+undauntedly to seek an inhospitable
+clime and unbroken soil. The resolu<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-60" id="APg_1-60"></a>[<a href="images/v1-60.png">60</a>]</span>tion,
+that led them, in pursuit of independence,
+to embark on rivers like
+seas, to search for unknown shores,
+and to sleep under the hovering mists
+of endless forests, whose baleful damps
+agued their limbs, was now turned into
+commercial speculations, till the national
+character exhibited a phenomenon
+in the history of the human mind&mdash;a
+head enthusiastically enterprising, with
+cold selfishness of heart. And woman,
+lovely woman!&mdash;they charm every
+where&mdash;still there is a degree of prudery,
+and a want of taste and ease in
+the manners of the American women,
+that renders them, in spite of their roses
+and lilies, far inferior to our European
+charmers. In the country, they have
+often a bewitching simplicity of character;
+but, in the cities, they have all
+the airs and ignorance of the ladies who<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-61" id="APg_1-61"></a>[<a href="images/v1-61.png">61</a>]</span>
+give the tone to the circles of the large
+trading towns in England. They are
+fond of their ornaments, merely because
+they are good, and not because
+they embellish their persons; and are
+more gratified to inspire the women
+with jealousy of these exterior advantages,
+than the men with love. All
+the frivolity which often (excuse me,
+Madam) renders the society of modest
+women so stupid in England, here
+seemed to throw still more leaden fetters
+on their charms. Not being an
+adept in gallantry, I found that I could
+only keep myself awake in their company
+by making downright love to
+them.</p>
+
+<p>"But, not to intrude on your patience,
+I retired to the track of land
+which I had purchased in the country,
+and my time passed pleasantly enough<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-62" id="APg_1-62"></a>[<a href="images/v1-62.png">62</a>]</span>
+while I cut down the trees, built my
+house, and planted my different crops.
+But winter and idleness came, and I
+longed for more elegant society, to hear
+what was passing in the world, and to
+do something better than vegetate with
+the animals that made a very considerable
+part of my household. Consequently,
+I determined to travel. Motion was
+a substitute for variety of objects; and,
+passing over immense tracks of country,
+I exhausted my exuberant spirits, without
+obtaining much experience. I every
+where saw industry the fore-runner
+and not the consequence, of luxury;
+but this country, every thing being on
+an ample scale, did not afford those
+picturesque views, which a certain degree
+of cultivation is necessary gradually
+to produce. The eye wandered
+without an object to fix upon over im<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-63" id="APg_1-63"></a>[<a href="images/v1-63.png">63</a>]</span>measureable
+plains, and lakes that seemed
+replenished by the ocean, whilst eternal
+forests of small clustering trees, obstructed
+the circulation of air, and embarrassed
+the path, without gratifying
+the eye of taste. No cottage smiling in
+the waste, no travellers hailed us, to give
+life to silent nature; or, if perchance
+we saw the print of a footstep in our
+path, it was a dreadful warning to turn
+aside; and the head ached as if assailed
+by the scalping knife. The Indians
+who hovered on the skirts of the European
+settlements had only learned of
+their neighbours to plunder, and they
+stole their guns from them to do it with
+more safety.</p>
+
+<p>"From the woods and back settlements,
+I returned to the towns, and
+learned to eat and drink most valiantly;
+but without entering into commerce<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-64" id="APg_1-64"></a>[<a href="images/v1-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+(and I detested commerce) I found I
+could not live there; and, growing heartily
+weary of the land of liberty and
+vulgar aristocracy, seated on her bags
+of dollars, I resolved once more to visit
+Europe. I wrote to a distant relation
+in England, with whom I had been
+educated, mentioning the vessel in
+which I intended to sail. Arriving in
+London, my senses were intoxicated. I
+ran from street to street, from theatre
+to theatre, and the women of the town
+(again I must beg pardon for my habitual
+frankness) appeared to me like
+angels.</p>
+
+<p>"A week was spent in this thoughtless
+manner, when, returning very late
+to the hotel in which I had lodged ever
+since my arrival, I was knocked down
+in a private street, and hurried, in a state
+of insensibility, into a coach, which<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-65" id="APg_1-65"></a>[<a href="images/v1-65.png">65</a>]</span>
+brought me hither, and I only recovered
+my senses to be treated like one
+who had lost them. My keepers are
+deaf to my remonstrances and enquiries,
+yet assure me that my confinement
+shall not last long. Still I cannot guess,
+though I weary myself with conjectures,
+why I am confined, or in what
+part of England this house is situated.
+I imagine sometimes that I hear the
+sea roar, and wished myself again on
+the Atlantic, till I had a glimpse of
+you<a name="AFNanchor_65-A_4" id="AFNanchor_65-A_4"></a><a href="#AFootnote_65-A_4" class="fnanchor">[65-A]</a>."</p>
+
+<p>A few moments were only allowed to
+Maria to comment on this narrative,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-66" id="APg_1-66"></a>[<a href="images/v1-66.png">66</a>]</span>
+when Darnford left her to her own
+thoughts, to the "never ending, still
+beginning," task of weighing his words,
+recollecting his tones of voice, and feeling
+them reverberate on her heart.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_54-A_3" id="AFootnote_54-A_3"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_54-A_3"><span class="label">[54-A]</span></a> The copy which had received the author's
+last corrections, breaks off in this place, and the
+pages which follow, to the end of Chap. IV, are
+printed from a copy in a less finished state.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_65-A_4" id="AFootnote_65-A_4"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_65-A_4"><span class="label">[65-A]</span></a> The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer
+of Maria in a former instance, appears to have
+been an after-thought of the author. This has
+occasioned the omission of any allusion to that
+circumstance in the preceding narration.
+</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-67" id="APg_1-67"></a>[<a href="images/v1-67.png">67</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_IV" id="ACHAP_IV"></a>CHAP. IV.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Pity</span>, and the forlorn seriousness of
+adversity, have both been considered as
+dispositions favourable to love, while
+satirical writers have attributed the
+propensity to the relaxing effect of
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing comma">idleness,</ins> what chance then had Maria
+of escaping, when pity, sorrow,
+and solitude all conspired to soften her
+mind, and nourish romantic wishes,
+and, from a natural progress, romantic
+expectations?</p>
+
+<p>Maria was six-and-twenty. But,
+such was the native soundness of her
+constitution, that time had only given
+to her countenance the character of her
+mind. Revolving thought, and exercised
+affections had banished some of<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-68" id="APg_1-68"></a>[<a href="images/v1-68.png">68</a>]</span>
+the playful graces of innocence, producing
+insensibly that irregularity of
+features which the struggles of the understanding
+to trace or govern the
+strong emotions of the heart, are wont
+to imprint on the yielding mass. Grief
+and care had mellowed, without obscuring,
+the bright tints of youth, and
+the thoughtfulness which resided on her
+brow did not take from the feminine
+softness of her features; nay, such was
+the sensibility which often mantled over
+it, that she frequently appeared, like a
+large proportion of her sex, only born
+to feel; and the activity of her well-proportioned,
+and even almost voluptuous
+figure, inspired the idea of
+strength of mind, rather than of body.
+There was a simplicity sometimes indeed
+in her manner, which bordered
+on infantine ingenuousness, that led peo<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-69" id="APg_1-69"></a>[<a href="images/v1-69.png">69</a>]</span>ple
+of common discernment to underrate
+her talents, and smile at the flights
+of her imagination. But those who
+could not comprehend the delicacy of
+her sentiments, were attached by her
+unfailing sympathy, so that she was very
+generally beloved by characters of very
+different descriptions; still, she was too
+much under the influence of an ardent
+imagination to adhere to common rules.</p>
+
+<p>There are mistakes of conduct which
+at five-and-twenty prove the strength of
+the mind, that, ten or fifteen years after,
+would demonstrate its weakness, its incapacity
+to acquire a sane judgment.
+The youths who are satisfied with the
+ordinary pleasures of life, and do not
+sigh after ideal phantoms of love and
+friendship, will never arrive at great maturity
+of understanding; but if these reveries
+are cherished, as is too frequently<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-70" id="APg_1-70"></a>[<a href="images/v1-70.png">70</a>]</span>
+the case with women, when experience
+ought to have taught them in what human
+happiness consists, they become as
+useless as they are wretched. Besides,
+their pains and pleasures are so dependent
+on outward circumstances, on the
+objects of their affections, that they
+seldom act from the impulse of a nerved
+mind, able to choose its own pursuit.</p>
+
+<p>Having had to struggle incessantly
+with the vices of mankind, Maria's
+imagination found repose in pourtraying
+the possible virtues the world might
+contain. Pygmalion formed an ivory
+maid, and longed for an informing soul.
+She, on the contrary, combined all the
+qualities of a hero's mind, and fate
+presented a statue in which she might
+enshrine them.</p>
+
+<p>We mean not to trace the progress
+of this passion, or recount how often<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-71" id="APg_1-71"></a>[<a href="images/v1-71.png">71</a>]</span>
+Darnford and Maria were obliged to
+part in the midst of an interesting conversation.
+Jemima ever watched on
+the tip-toe of fear, and frequently separated
+them on a false alarm, when
+they would have given worlds to remain
+a little longer together.</p>
+
+<p>A magic lamp now seemed to be suspended
+in Maria's prison, and fairy
+landscapes flitted round the gloomy
+walls, late so blank. Rushing from the
+depth of despair, on the seraph wing of
+hope, she found herself happy.&mdash;She was
+beloved, and every emotion was rapturous.</p>
+
+<p>To Darnford she had not shown a decided
+affection; the fear of outrunning
+his, a sure proof of love, made her often
+assume a coldness and indifference foreign
+from her character; and, even when
+giving way to the playful emotions of a<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-72" id="APg_1-72"></a>[<a href="images/v1-72.png">72</a>]</span>
+heart just loosened from the frozen
+bond of grief, there was a delicacy in
+her manner of expressing her sensibility,
+which made him doubt whether it
+was the effect of love.</p>
+
+<p>One evening, when Jemima left them,
+to listen to the sound of a distant footstep,
+which seemed cautiously to approach,
+he seized Maria's hand&mdash;it was
+not withdrawn. They conversed with
+earnestness of their situation; and, during
+the conversation, he once or twice
+gently drew her towards him. He felt
+the fragrance of her breath, and longed,
+yet feared, to touch the lips from
+which it issued; spirits of purity seemed
+to guard them, while all the enchanting
+graces of love sported on her cheeks,
+and languished in her eyes.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima entering, he reflected on his
+diffidence with poignant regret, and,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-73" id="APg_1-73"></a>[<a href="images/v1-73.png">73</a>]</span>
+she once more taking alarm, he ventured,
+as Maria stood near his chair, to
+approach her lips with a declaration of
+love. She drew back with solemnity,
+he hung down his head abashed; but
+lifting his eyes timidly, they met her's;
+she had determined, during that instant,
+and suffered their rays to mingle. He
+took, with more ardour, reassured, a
+half-consenting, half-reluctant kiss, reluctant
+only from modesty; and there
+was a sacredness in her dignified manner
+of reclining her glowing face on
+his shoulder, that powerfully impressed
+him. Desire was lost in more ineffable
+emotions, and to protect her from insult
+and sorrow&mdash;to make her happy,
+seemed not only the first wish of his heart,
+but the most noble duty of his life.
+Such angelic confidence demanded the
+fidelity of honour; but could he, feel<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-74" id="APg_1-74"></a>[<a href="images/v1-74.png">74</a>]</span>ing
+her in every pulsation, could he
+ever change, could he be a villain? The
+emotion with which she, for a moment,
+allowed herself to be pressed to his bosom,
+the tear of rapturous sympathy,
+mingled with a soft melancholy sentiment
+of recollected disappointment,
+said&mdash;more of truth and faithfulness,
+than the tongue could have given utterance
+to in hours! They were silent&mdash;yet
+discoursed, how eloquently? till,
+after a moment's reflection, Maria drew
+her chair by the side of his, and, with
+a composed sweetness of voice, and
+supernatural benignity of countenance,
+said, "I must open my whole heart
+to you; you must be told who I am,
+why I am here, and why, telling you
+I am a wife, I blush not to"&mdash;the blush
+spoke the rest.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima was again at her elbow, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-75" id="APg_1-75"></a>[<a href="images/v1-75.png">75</a>]</span>
+the restraint of her presence did not
+prevent an animated conversation, in
+which love, sly urchin, was ever at bo-peep.</p>
+
+<p>So much of heaven did they enjoy,
+that paradise bloomed around them; or
+they, by a powerful spell, had been
+transported into Armida's garden. Love,
+the grand enchanter, "lapt them in Elysium,"
+and every sense was harmonized
+to joy and social extacy. So animated,
+indeed, were their accents of tenderness,
+in discussing what, in other circumstances,
+would have been common-place
+subjects, that Jemima felt, with
+surprise, a tear of pleasure trickling
+down her rugged cheeks. She wiped
+it away, half ashamed; and when Maria
+kindly enquired the cause, with all
+the eager solicitude of a happy being
+wishing to impart to all nature its<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-76" id="APg_1-76"></a>[<a href="images/v1-76.png">76</a>]</span>
+overflowing felicity, Jemima owned
+that it was the first tear that social enjoyment
+had ever drawn from her. She
+seemed indeed to breathe more freely;
+the cloud of suspicion cleared away
+from her brow; she felt herself, for
+once in her life, treated like a fellow-creature.</p>
+
+<p>Imagination! who can paint thy
+power; or reflect the evanescent tints
+of hope fostered by thee? A despondent
+gloom had long obscured Maria's horizon&mdash;now
+the sun broke forth, the
+rainbow appeared, and every prospect
+was fair. Horror still reigned in the
+darkened cells, suspicion lurked in the
+passages, and whispered along the
+walls. The yells of men possessed,
+sometimes made them pause, and wonder
+that they felt so happy, in a tomb
+of living death. They even chid them<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-77" id="APg_1-77"></a>[<a href="images/v1-77.png">77</a>]</span>selves
+for such apparent insensibility;
+still the world contained not three happier
+beings. And Jemima, after again
+patrolling the passage, was so softened
+by the air of confidence which breathed
+around her, that she voluntarily began
+an account of herself.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-78" id="APg_1-78"></a>[<a href="images/v1-78.png">78</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_V" id="ACHAP_V"></a>CHAP. V.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">My</span> father," said Jemima, "seduced
+my mother, a pretty girl, with whom
+he lived fellow-servant; and she no
+sooner perceived the natural, the dreaded
+consequence, than the terrible conviction
+flashed on her&mdash;that she was
+ruined. Honesty, and a regard for her
+reputation, had been the only principles
+inculcated by her mother; and
+they had been so forcibly impressed, that
+she feared shame, more than the poverty
+to which it would lead. Her incessant
+importunities to prevail upon my father
+to screen her from reproach by marrying
+her, as he had promised in the
+fervour of seduction, estranged him from
+her so completely, that her very person<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-79" id="APg_1-79"></a>[<a href="images/v1-79.png">79</a>]</span>
+became distasteful to him; and he began
+to hate, as well as despise me, before
+I was born.</p>
+
+<p>"My mother, grieved to the soul by
+his neglect, and unkind treatment, actually
+resolved to famish herself; and
+injured her health by the attempt;
+though she had not sufficient resolution
+to adhere to her project, or renounce it
+entirely. Death came not at her call;
+yet sorrow, and the methods she adopted
+to conceal her condition, still doing the
+work of a house-maid, had such an
+effect on her constitution, that she died
+in the wretched garret, where her virtuous
+mistress had forced her to take
+refuge in the very pangs of labour,
+though my father, after a slight reproof,
+was allowed to remain in his place&mdash;allowed
+by the mother of six children,
+who, scarcely permitting a footstep to<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-80" id="APg_1-80"></a>[<a href="images/v1-80.png">80</a>]</span>
+be heard, during her month's indulgence,
+felt no sympathy for the poor
+wretch, denied every comfort required
+by her situation.</p>
+
+<p>"The day my mother died, the
+ninth after my birth, I was consigned
+to the care of the cheapest nurse my
+father could find; who suckled her own
+child at the same time, and lodged as
+many more as she could get, in two
+cellar-like apartments.</p>
+
+<p>"Poverty, and the habit of seeing
+children die off her hands, had so
+hardened her heart, that the office of a
+mother did not awaken the tenderness
+of a woman; nor were the feminine
+caresses which seem a part of the rearing
+of a child, ever bestowed on me.
+The chicken has a wing to shelter under;
+but I had no bosom to nestle in,
+no kindred warmth to foster me. Left<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-81" id="APg_1-81"></a>[<a href="images/v1-81.png">81</a>]</span>
+in dirt, to cry with cold and hunger
+till I was weary, and sleep without ever
+being prepared by exercise, or lulled
+by kindness to rest; could I be expected
+to become any thing but a weak and
+rickety babe? Still, in spite of neglect,
+I continued to exist, to learn to
+curse existence,<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads '['">"</ins> her countenance grew
+ferocious as she spoke, <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads ']'">"</ins>and the treatment
+that rendered me miserable, seemed
+to sharpen my wits. Confined then
+in a damp hovel, to rock the cradle of
+the succeeding tribe, I looked like a
+little old woman, or a hag shrivelling into
+nothing. The furrows of reflection and
+care contracted the youthful cheek,
+and gave a sort of supernatural wildness
+to the ever watchful eye. During
+this period, my father had married another
+fellow-servant, who loved him
+less, and knew better how to manage<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-82" id="APg_1-82"></a>[<a href="images/v1-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+his passion, than my mother. She likewise
+proving with child, they agreed
+to keep a shop: my step-mother, if, being
+an illegitimate offspring, I may
+venture thus to characterize her, having
+obtained a sum of a rich relation,
+for that purpose.</p>
+
+<p>"Soon after her lying-in, she prevailed
+on my father to take me home, to save
+the expence of maintaining me, and
+of hiring a girl to assist her in the care
+of the child. I was young, it was true,
+but appeared a knowing little thing,
+and might be made handy. Accordingly
+I was brought to her house; but
+not to a home&mdash;for a home I never
+knew. Of this child, a daughter, she
+was extravagantly fond; and it was a
+part of my employment, to assist to spoil
+her, by humouring all her whims, and
+bearing all her caprices. Feeling her<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-83" id="APg_1-83"></a>[<a href="images/v1-83.png">83</a>]</span>
+own consequence, before she could
+speak, she had learned the art of tormenting
+me, and if I ever dared to resist,
+I received blows, laid on with no
+compunctious hand, or was sent to bed
+dinnerless, as well as supperless. I said
+that it was a part of my daily labour to
+attend this child, with the servility of a
+slave; still it was but a part. I was
+sent out in all seasons, and from place
+to place, to carry burdens far above
+my strength, without being allowed to
+draw near the fire, or ever being
+cheered by encouragement or kindness.
+No wonder then, treated like a
+creature of another species, that I began
+to envy, and at length to hate,
+the darling of the house. Yet, I perfectly
+remember, that it was the caresses,
+and kind expressions of my step-mother,
+which first excited my jealous<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-84" id="APg_1-84"></a>[<a href="images/v1-84.png">84</a>]</span>
+discontent. Once, I cannot forget it,
+when she was calling in vain her wayward
+child to kiss her, I ran to her,
+saying, 'I will kiss you, ma'am!' and
+how did my heart, which was in my
+mouth, sink, what was my debasement
+of soul, when pushed away with&mdash;'I
+do not want you, pert thing!'
+Another day, when a new gown had
+excited the highest good humour, and
+she uttered the appropriate <i>dear</i>, addressed
+unexpectedly to me, I thought
+I could never do enough to please her;
+I was all alacrity, and rose proportionably
+in my own estimation.</p>
+
+<p>"As her daughter grew up, she was
+pampered with cakes and fruit, while
+I was, literally speaking, fed with the
+refuse of the table, with her leavings.
+A liquorish tooth is, I believe, common
+to children, and I used to steal any<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-85" id="APg_1-85"></a>[<a href="images/v1-85.png">85</a>]</span>
+thing sweet, that I could catch up with
+a chance of concealment. When detected,
+she was not content to chastize
+me herself at the moment, but, on my
+father's return in the evening (he was
+a shopman), the principal discourse was
+to recount my faults, and attribute
+them to the wicked disposition which I
+had brought into the world with me,
+inherited from my mother. He did not
+fail to leave the marks of his resentment
+on my body, and then solaced
+himself by playing with my sister.&mdash;I
+could have murdered her at those moments.
+To save myself from these unmerciful
+corrections, I resorted to falshood,
+and the untruths which I sturdily
+maintained, were brought in judgment
+against me, to support my tyrant's
+inhuman charge of my natural propensity
+to vice. Seeing me treated with<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-86" id="APg_1-86"></a>[<a href="images/v1-86.png">86</a>]</span>
+contempt, and always being fed and
+dressed better, my sister conceived a
+contemptuous opinion of me, that
+proved an obstacle to all affection; and
+my father, hearing continually of my
+faults, began to consider me as a curse
+entailed on him for his sins: he was
+therefore easily prevailed on to bind
+me apprentice to one of my step-mother's
+friends, who kept a slop-shop in
+Wapping. I was represented (as it
+was said) in my true colours; but she,
+'warranted,' snapping her fingers,
+'that she should break my spirit or
+heart.'</p>
+
+<p>"My mother replied, with a whine,
+'that if any body could make me better,
+it was such a clever woman as herself;
+though, for her own part, she had
+tried in vain; but good-nature was her
+fault.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-87" id="APg_1-87"></a>[<a href="images/v1-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+"I shudder with horror, when I recollect
+the treatment I had now to endure.
+Not only under the lash of my task-mistress,
+but the drudge of the maid,
+apprentices and children, I never had
+a taste of human kindness to soften the
+rigour of perpetual labour. I had been
+introduced as an object of abhorrence
+into the family; as a creature of whom
+my step-mother, though she had been
+kind enough to let me live in the house
+with her own child, could make nothing.
+I was described as a wretch,
+whose nose must be kept to the grinding
+stone&mdash;and it was held there with
+an iron grasp. It seemed indeed the
+privilege of their superior nature to kick
+me about, like the dog or cat. If I
+were attentive, I was called fawning,
+if refractory, an obstinate mule, and
+like a mule I received their censure on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-88" id="APg_1-88"></a>[<a href="images/v1-88.png">88</a>]</span>
+my loaded back. Often has my mistress,
+for some instance of forgetfulness, thrown
+me from one side of the kitchen to the
+other, knocked my head against the
+wall, spit in my face, with various refinements
+on barbarity that I forbear to
+enumerate, though they were all acted
+over again by the servant, with additional
+insults, to which the appellation
+of <i>bastard</i>, was commonly added, with
+taunts or sneers. But I will not attempt
+to give you an adequate idea of
+my situation, lest you, who probably
+have never been drenched with the
+dregs of human misery, should think I
+exaggerate.</p>
+
+<p>"I stole now, from absolute necessity,&mdash;bread;
+yet whatever else was
+taken, which I had it not in my power
+to take, was ascribed to me. I was
+the filching cat, the ravenous dog, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-89" id="APg_1-89"></a>[<a href="images/v1-89.png">89</a>]</span>
+dumb brute, who must bear all; for if
+I endeavoured to exculpate myself, I
+was silenced, without any enquiries
+being made, with 'Hold your tongue,
+you never tell truth.' Even the very
+air I breathed was tainted with scorn;
+for I was sent to the neighbouring shops
+with Glutton, Liar, or Thief, written on
+my forehead. This was, at first, the
+most bitter punishment; but sullen
+pride, or a kind of stupid desperation,
+made me, at length, almost regardless
+of the contempt, which had wrung
+from me so many solitary tears at the
+only moments when I was allowed to
+rest.</p>
+
+<p>"Thus was I the mark of cruelty till
+my sixteenth year; and then I have
+only to point out a change of misery;
+for a period I never knew. Allow me
+first to make one observation. Now I<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-90" id="APg_1-90"></a>[<a href="images/v1-90.png">90</a>]</span>
+look back, I cannot help attributing the
+greater part of my misery, to the misfortune
+of having been thrown into the
+world without the grand support of life&mdash;a
+mother's affection. I had no one to
+love me; or to make me respected, to
+enable me to acquire respect. I was an
+egg dropped on the sand; a pauper by
+nature, <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'hunted'">shunted</ins> from family to family,
+who belonged to nobody&mdash;and nobody
+cared for me. I was despised from my
+birth, and denied the chance of obtaining
+a footing for myself in society. Yes;
+I had not even the chance of being
+considered as a fellow-creature&mdash;yet all
+the people with whom I lived, brutalized
+as they were by the low cunning
+of trade, and the despicable shifts of
+poverty, were not without bowels,
+though they never yearned for me. I
+was, in fact, born a slave, and chained<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-91" id="APg_1-91"></a>[<a href="images/v1-91.png">91</a>]</span>
+by infamy to slavery during the whole
+of existence, without having any companions
+to alleviate it by sympathy, or
+teach me how to rise above it by their
+example. But, to resume the thread of
+my tale&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>"At sixteen, I suddenly grew tall,
+and something like comeliness appeared
+on a Sunday, when I had time to wash
+my face, and put on clean clothes. My
+master had once or twice caught hold
+of me in the passage; but I instinctively
+avoided his disgusting caresses. One
+day however, when the family were
+at a methodist meeting, he contrived to
+be alone in the house with me, and by
+blows&mdash;yes; blows and menaces, compelled
+me to submit to his ferocious
+desire; and, to avoid my mistress's
+fury, I was obliged in future to comply,
+and skulk to my loft at his com<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-92" id="APg_1-92"></a>[<a href="images/v1-92.png">92</a>]</span>mand,
+in spite of increasing loathing.</p>
+
+<p>"The anguish which was now pent
+up in my bosom, seemed to open a new
+world to me: I began to extend my
+thoughts beyond myself, and grieve
+for human misery, till I discovered,
+with horror&mdash;ah! what horror!&mdash;that I
+was with child. I know not why I felt
+a mixed sensation of despair and tenderness,
+excepting that, ever called a
+bastard, a bastard appeared to me an
+object of the greatest compassion in
+creation.</p>
+
+<p>"I communicated this dreadful circumstance
+to my master, who was almost
+equally alarmed at the intelligence;
+for he feared his wife, and public
+censure at the meeting. After some
+weeks of deliberation had elapsed, I in
+continual fear that my altered shape<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-93" id="APg_1-93"></a>[<a href="images/v1-93.png">93</a>]</span>
+would be noticed, my master gave me
+a medicine in a phial, which he desired
+me to take, telling me, without any
+circumlocution, for what purpose it
+was designed. I burst into tears, I
+thought it was killing myself&mdash;yet was
+such a self as I worth preserving? He
+cursed me for a fool, and left me to my
+own reflections. I could not resolve to
+take this infernal potion; but I wrapped
+it up in an old gown, and hid it
+in a corner of my box.</p>
+
+<p>"Nobody yet suspected me, because
+they had been accustomed to view me
+as a creature of another species. But
+the threatening storm at last broke over
+my devoted head&mdash;never shall I forget
+it! One Sunday evening when I was
+left, as usual, to take care of the house,
+my master came home intoxicated, and
+I became the prey of his brutal appe<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-94" id="APg_1-94"></a>[<a href="images/v1-94.png">94</a>]</span>tite.
+His extreme intoxication made
+him forget his customary caution, and
+my mistress entered and found us in a
+situation that could not have been more
+hateful to her than me. Her husband
+was 'pot-valiant,' he feared her not
+at the moment, nor had he then much
+reason, for she instantly turned the
+whole force of her anger another
+way. She tore off my cap, scratched,
+kicked, and buffetted me, till she had
+exhausted her strength, declaring, as she
+rested her arm, 'that I had wheedled
+her husband from her.&mdash;But, could any
+thing better be expected from a wretch,
+whom she had taken into her house out
+of pure charity?' What a torrent of
+abuse rushed out? till, almost breathless,
+she concluded with saying, 'that I
+was born a strumpet; it ran in my<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-95" id="APg_1-95"></a>[<a href="images/v1-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+blood, and nothing good could come
+to those who harboured me.'</p>
+
+<p>"My situation was, of course, discovered,
+and she declared that I should
+not stay another night under the same
+roof with an honest family. I was
+therefore pushed out of doors, and my
+trumpery thrown after me, when it had
+been contemptuously examined in the
+passage, lest I should have stolen any
+thing.</p>
+
+<p>"Behold me then in the street, utterly
+destitute! Whither could I creep for
+shelter? To my father's roof I had no
+claim, when not pursued by shame&mdash;now
+I shrunk back as from death, from
+my mother's cruel reproaches, my father's
+execrations. I could not endure
+to hear him curse the day I was born,
+though life had been a curse to me. Of
+death I thought, but with a confused<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-96" id="APg_1-96"></a>[<a href="images/v1-96.png">96</a>]</span>
+emotion of terror, as I stood leaning
+my head on a post, and starting at every
+footstep, lest it should be my mistress
+coming to tear my heart out. One of
+the boys of the shop passing by, heard
+my tale, and immediately repaired to
+his master, to give him a description of
+my situation; and he touched the right
+key&mdash;the scandal it would give rise to,
+if I were left to repeat my tale to every
+enquirer. This plea came home to his
+reason, who had been sobered by his
+wife's rage, the fury of which fell on
+him when I was out of her reach, and
+he sent the boy to me with half-a-guinea,
+desiring him to conduct me to a
+house, where beggars, and other
+wretches, the refuse of society, nightly
+lodged.</p>
+
+<p>"This night was spent in a state of
+stupefaction, or desperation. I detested
+mankind, and abhorred myself.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-97" id="APg_1-97"></a>[<a href="images/v1-97.png">97</a>]</span>
+"In the morning I ventured out, to
+throw myself in my master's way, at his
+usual hour of going abroad. I approached
+him, he 'damned me for a
+b&mdash;&mdash;, declared I had disturbed the
+peace of the family, and that he had
+sworn to his wife, never to take any
+more notice of me.' He left me; but,
+instantly returning, he told me that he
+should speak to his friend, a parish-officer,
+to get a nurse for the brat I laid
+to him; and advised me, if I wished to
+keep out of the house of correction, not
+to make free with his name.</p>
+
+<p>"I hurried back to my hole, and, rage
+giving place to despair, sought for the
+potion that was to procure abortion, and
+swallowed it, with a wish that it might
+destroy me, at the same time that it
+stopped the sensations of new-born life,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-98" id="APg_1-98"></a>[<a href="images/v1-98.png">98</a>]</span>
+which I felt with indescribable emotion.
+My head turned round, my heart grew
+sick, and in the horrors of approaching
+dissolution, mental anguish was swallowed
+up. The effect of the medicine
+was violent, and I was confined to my
+bed several days; but, youth and a
+strong constitution prevailing, I once
+more crawled out, to ask myself the
+cruel question, 'Whither I should
+go?' I had but two shillings left in
+my pocket, the rest had been expended,
+by a poor woman who slept in the
+same room, to pay for my lodging,
+and purchase the necessaries of which
+she partook.</p>
+
+<p>"With this wretch I went into the
+neighbouring streets to beg, and my
+disconsolate appearance drew a few
+pence from the idle, enabling me still
+to command a bed; till, recovering<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-99" id="APg_1-99"></a>[<a href="images/v1-99.png">99</a>]</span>
+from my illness, and taught to put on
+my rags to the best advantage, I was
+accosted from different motives, and
+yielded to the desire of the brutes I met,
+with the same detestation that I had
+felt for my still more brutal master.
+I have since read in novels of the blandishments
+of seduction, but I had not
+even the pleasure of being enticed
+into vice.</p>
+
+<p>"I shall not," interrupted Jemima,
+"lead your imagination into all the
+scenes of wretchedness and depravity,
+which I was condemned to view; or
+mark the different stages of my debasing
+misery. Fate dragged me
+through the very kennels of society;
+I was still a slave, a bastard, a common
+property. Become familiar with vice,
+for I wish to conceal nothing from you,
+I picked the pockets of the drunkards<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-100" id="APg_1-100"></a>[<a href="images/v1-100.png">100</a>]</span>
+who abused me; and proved by my
+conduct, that I deserved the epithets,
+with which they loaded me at moments
+when distrust ought to cease.</p>
+
+<p>"Detesting my nightly occupation,
+though valuing, if I may so use the
+word, my independence, which only
+consisted in choosing the street in which
+I should wander, or the roof, when I
+had money, in which I should hide my
+head, I was some time before I could
+prevail on myself to accept of a place
+in a house of ill fame, to which a girl,
+with whom I had accidentally conversed
+in the street, had recommended
+me. I had been hunted almost into a
+a fever, by the watchmen of the quarter
+of the town I frequented; one,
+whom I had unwittingly offended, giving
+the word to the whole pack. You
+can scarcely conceive the tyranny ex<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-101" id="APg_1-101"></a>[<a href="images/v1-101.png">101</a>]</span>ercised
+by these wretches: considering
+themselves as the instruments of
+the very laws they violate, the pretext
+which steels their conscience, hardens
+their heart. Not content with receiving
+from us, outlaws of society (let
+other women talk of favours) a brutal
+gratification gratuitously as a privilege
+of office, they extort a tithe of prostitution,
+and harrass with threats the
+poor creatures whose occupation affords
+not the means to silence the growl of
+avarice. To escape from this persecution,
+I once more entered into servitude.</p>
+
+<p>"A life of comparative regularity
+restored my health; and&mdash;do not start&mdash;my
+manners were improved, in a situation
+where vice sought to render itself
+alluring, and taste was cultivated to
+fashion the person, if not to refine the
+mind. Besides, the common civility of<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-102" id="APg_1-102"></a>[<a href="images/v1-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+speech, contrasted with the gross vulgarity
+to which I had been accustomed,
+was something like the polish of civilization.
+I was not shut out from all intercourse
+of humanity. Still I was galled
+by the yoke of service, and my mistress
+often flying into violent fits of passion,
+made me dread a sudden dismission,
+which I understood was always the
+case. I was therefore prevailed on,
+though I felt a horror of men, to accept
+the offer of a gentleman, rather in the
+decline of years, to keep his house,
+pleasantly situated in a little village
+near Hampstead.</p>
+
+<p>"He was a man of great talents, and
+of brilliant wit; but, a worn-out votary
+of voluptuousness, his desires became
+fastidious in proportion as they
+grew weak, and the native tenderness
+of his heart was undermined by a vi<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-103" id="APg_1-103"></a>[<a href="images/v1-103.png">103</a>]</span>tiated
+imagination. A thoughtless <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'carreer'">career</ins>
+of libertinism and social enjoyment,
+had injured his health to such a
+degree, that, whatever pleasure his conversation
+afforded me (and my esteem
+was ensured by proofs of the generous
+humanity of his disposition), the being
+his mistress was purchasing it at a very
+dear rate. With such a keen perception
+of the delicacies of sentiment,
+with an imagination invigorated by
+the exercise of genius, how could he
+sink into the grossness of sensuality!</p>
+
+<p>"But, to pass over a subject which I
+recollect with pain, I must remark to
+you, as an answer to your often-repeated
+question, 'Why my sentiments and
+language were superior to my station?'
+that I now began to read, to beguile
+the tediousness of solitude, and to
+gratify an inquisitive, active mind. I<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-104" id="APg_1-104"></a>[<a href="images/v1-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+had often, in my childhood, followed a
+ballad-singer, to hear the sequel of a
+dismal story, though sure of being severely
+punished for delaying to return
+with whatever I was sent to purchase. I
+could just spell and put a sentence together,
+and I listened to the various arguments,
+though often mingled with
+obscenity, which occurred at the table
+where I was allowed to preside: for a
+literary friend or two frequently came
+home with my master, to dine and pass
+the night. Having lost the privileged respect
+of my sex, my presence, instead
+of restraining, perhaps gave the reins
+to their tongues; still I had the advantage
+of hearing discussions, from which,
+in the common course of life, women
+are excluded.</p>
+
+<p>"You may easily imagine, that it
+was only by degrees that I could com<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-105" id="APg_1-105"></a>[<a href="images/v1-105.png">105</a>]</span>prehend
+some of the subjects they investigated,
+or acquire from their reasoning
+what might be termed a moral
+sense. But my fondness of reading increasing,
+and my master occasionally
+shutting himself up in this retreat, for
+weeks together, to write, I had many
+opportunities of improvement. At
+first, considering money <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '(I was right!&quot; exclaimed'">I was right!" (</ins>exclaimed Jemima, altering her tone of
+voice) "as the only means, after my loss
+of reputation, of obtaining respect, or
+even the toleration of humanity, I had
+not the least scruple to secrete a part of
+the sums intrusted to me, and to screen
+myself from detection by a system of
+falshood. But, acquiring new principles,
+I began to have the ambition of
+returning to the respectable part of society,
+and was weak enough to suppose
+it possible. The attention of my unas<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-106" id="APg_1-106"></a>[<a href="images/v1-106.png">106</a>]</span>suming
+instructor, who, without being
+ignorant of his own powers, possessed
+great simplicity of manners, strengthened
+the illusion. Having sometimes
+caught up hints for thought, from my
+untutored remarks, he often led me to
+discuss the subjects he was treating,
+and would read to me his productions,
+previous to their publication, wishing
+to profit by the criticism of unsophisticated
+feeling. The aim of his writings
+was to touch the simple springs of
+the heart; for he despised the would-be
+oracles, the self-elected philosophers,
+who fright away fancy, while sifting
+each grain of thought to prove that
+slowness of comprehension is wisdom.</p>
+
+<p>"I should have distinguished this as
+a moment of sunshine, a happy period
+in my life, had not the repugnance the
+disgusting libertinism of my protector<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-107" id="APg_1-107"></a>[<a href="images/v1-107.png">107</a>]</span>
+inspired, daily become more painful.&mdash;And,
+indeed, I soon did recollect it as
+such with agony, when his sudden
+death (for he had recourse to the most
+exhilarating cordials to keep up the
+convivial tone of his spirits) again
+threw me into the desert of human society.
+Had he had any time for reflection,
+I am certain he would have
+left the little property in his power to
+me: but, attacked by the fatal apoplexy
+in town, his heir, a man of
+rigid morals, brought his wife with
+him to take possession of the house and
+effects, before I was even informed of
+his death,&mdash;'to prevent,' as she took
+care indirectly to tell me, 'such a
+creature as she supposed me to be, from
+purloining any of them, had I been
+apprized of the event in time.'</p>
+
+<p>"The grief I felt at the sudden<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-108" id="APg_1-108"></a>[<a href="images/v1-108.png">108</a>]</span>
+shock the information gave me, which
+at first had nothing selfish in it, was
+treated with contempt, and I was ordered
+to pack up my clothes; and a few
+trinkets and books, given me by the
+generous deceased, were contested,
+while they piously hoped, with a reprobating
+shake of the head, 'that
+God would have mercy on his sinful
+soul!' With some difficulty, I obtained
+my arrears of wages; but asking&mdash;such
+is the spirit-grinding consequence
+of poverty and infamy&mdash;for a character
+for honesty and economy, which God
+knows I merited, I was told by this&mdash;why
+must I call her woman?&mdash;'that
+it would go against her conscience to
+recommend a kept mistress.' Tears
+started in my eyes, burning tears; for
+there are situations in which a wretch<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-109" id="APg_1-109"></a>[<a href="images/v1-109.png">109</a>]</span>
+is humbled by the contempt they are
+conscious they do not deserve.</p>
+
+<p>"I returned to the metropolis; but
+the solitude of a poor lodging was inconceivably
+dreary, after the society I
+had enjoyed. To be cut off from human
+converse, now I had been taught
+to relish it, was to wander a ghost
+among the living. Besides, I foresaw, to
+aggravate the severity of my fate, that
+my little pittance would soon melt
+away. I endeavoured to obtain needlework;
+but, not having been taught early,
+and my hands being rendered clumsy
+by hard work, I did not sufficiently excel
+to be employed by the ready-made
+linen shops, when so many women,
+better qualified, were suing for it.
+The want of a character prevented my
+getting a place; for, irksome as servitude
+would have been to me, I should<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-110" id="APg_1-110"></a>[<a href="images/v1-110.png">110</a>]</span>
+have made another trial, had it been
+feasible. Not that I disliked employment,
+but the inequality of condition
+to which I must have submitted.
+I had acquired a taste for literature,
+during the five years I had lived with
+a literary man, occasionally conversing
+with men of the first abilities of the
+age; and now to descend to the lowest
+vulgarity, was a degree of wretchedness
+not to be imagined unfelt. I had
+not, it is true, tasted the charms of affection,
+but I had been familiar with
+the graces of humanity.</p>
+
+<p>"One of the gentlemen, whom I
+had frequently dined in company with,
+while I was treated like a companion,
+met me in the street, and enquired
+after my health. I seized the occasion,
+and began to describe my situation;
+but he was in haste to join, at dinner,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-111" id="APg_1-111"></a>[<a href="images/v1-111.png">111</a>]</span>
+a select party of choice spirits; therefore,
+without waiting to hear me, he
+impatiently put a guinea into my hand,
+saying, 'It was a pity such a sensible
+woman should be in distress&mdash;he wished
+me well from his soul.'</p>
+
+<p>"To another I wrote, stating my case,
+and requesting advice. He was an advocate
+for unequivocal sincerity; and
+had often, in my presence, descanted
+on the evils which arise in society from
+the despotism of rank and riches.</p>
+
+<p>"In reply, I received a long essay on
+the energy of the human mind, with
+continual allusions to his own force of
+character. He added, 'That the woman
+who could write such a letter as I
+had sent him, could never be in want
+of resources, were she to look into herself,
+and exert her powers; misery was
+the consequence of indolence, and, as<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-112" id="APg_1-112"></a>[<a href="images/v1-112.png">112</a>]</span>
+to my being shut out from society, it
+was the lot of man to submit to certain
+privations.'</p>
+
+<p>"How often have I heard," said
+Jemima, interrupting her narrative,
+"in conversation, and read in books,
+that every person willing to work may
+find employment? It is the vague assertion,
+I believe, of insensible indolence,
+when it relates to men; but, with
+respect to women, I am sure of its fallacy,
+unless they will submit to the
+most menial bodily labour; and even
+to be employed at hard labour is out of
+the reach of many, whose reputation
+misfortune or folly has tainted.</p>
+
+<p>"How writers, professing to be friends
+to freedom, and the improvement of
+morals, can assert that poverty is no
+evil, I cannot imagine."</p>
+
+<p>"No more can I," interrupted Ma<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-113" id="APg_1-113"></a>[<a href="images/v1-113.png">113</a>]</span>ria,
+"yet they even expatiate on the
+peculiar happiness of indigence, though
+in what it can consist, excepting in
+brutal rest, when a man can barely earn
+a subsistence, I cannot imagine. The
+mind is necessarily imprisoned in its
+own little tenement; and, fully occupied
+by keeping it in repair, has not
+time to rove abroad for improvement.
+The book of knowledge is closely
+clasped, against those who must fulfil
+their daily task of severe manual labour
+or die; and curiosity, rarely excited by
+thought or information, seldom moves
+on the stagnate lake of ignorance."</p>
+
+<p>"As far as I have been able to observe,"
+replied Jemima, "prejudices,
+caught up by chance, are obstinately
+maintained by the poor, to the exclusion
+of improvement; they have not
+time to reason or reflect to any extent,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-114" id="APg_1-114"></a>[<a href="images/v1-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+or minds sufficiently exercised to adopt
+the principles of action, which form
+perhaps the only basis of contentment
+in every station<a name="AFNanchor_114-A_5" id="AFNanchor_114-A_5"></a><a href="#AFootnote_114-A_5" class="fnanchor">[114-A]</a>."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>"And independence," said Darnford,
+"they are necessarily strangers to,
+even the independence of despising their
+persecutors. If the poor are happy, or
+can be happy, <i>things are very well as they
+are</i>. And I cannot conceive on what
+principle those writers contend for a
+change of system, who support this
+opinion. The authors on the other
+side of the question are much more
+consistent, who grant the fact; yet, insisting
+that it is the lot of the majority<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-115" id="APg_1-115"></a>[<a href="images/v1-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+to be oppressed in this life, kindly turn
+them over to another, to rectify the
+false weights and measures of this, as
+the only way to justify the dispensations
+of Providence. I have not," continued
+Darnford, "an opinion more firmly
+fixed by observation in my mind, than
+that, though riches may fail to produce
+proportionate happiness, poverty most
+commonly excludes it, by shutting up
+all the avenues to improvement."</p>
+
+<p>"And as for the affections," added
+Maria, with a sigh, "how gross, and
+even tormenting do they become, unless
+regulated by an improving mind!
+The culture of the heart ever, I believe,
+keeps pace with that of the
+mind. But pray go on," addressing
+Jemima, "though your narrative gives
+rise to the most painful reflections on
+the present state of society."</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-116" id="APg_1-116"></a>[<a href="images/v1-116.png">116</a>]</span>
+"Not to trouble you," continued
+she, "with a detailed description of all
+the painful feelings of unavailing exertion,
+I have only to tell you, that at
+last I got recommended to wash in a
+few families, who did me the favour
+to admit me into their houses, without
+the most strict enquiry, to wash from
+one in the morning till eight at night,
+for eighteen or twenty-pence a day.
+On the happiness to be enjoyed over a
+washing-tub I need not comment; yet
+you will allow me to observe, that this
+was a wretchedness of situation peculiar
+to my sex. A man with half my industry,
+and, I may say, abilities, could
+have procured a decent livelihood, and
+discharged some of the duties which
+knit mankind together; whilst I, who
+had acquired a taste for the rational, nay,
+in honest pride let me assert it, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-117" id="APg_1-117"></a>[<a href="images/v1-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+virtuous enjoyments of life, was cast
+aside as the filth of society. Condemned
+to labour, like a machine, only
+to earn bread, and scarcely that, I became
+melancholy and desperate.</p>
+
+<p>"I have now to mention a circumstance
+which fills me with remorse, and
+fear it will entirely deprive me of your
+esteem. A tradesman became attached
+to me, and visited me frequently,&mdash;and
+I at last obtained such a power over
+him, that he offered to take me home
+to his house.&mdash;Consider, dear madam,
+I was famishing: wonder not that I became
+a wolf!&mdash;The only reason for not
+taking me home immediately, was the
+having a girl in the house, with child
+by him&mdash;and this girl&mdash;I advised him&mdash;yes,
+I did! would I could forget it!&mdash;to
+turn out of doors: and one night he
+determined to follow my advice, Poor<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-118" id="APg_1-118"></a>[<a href="images/v1-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+wretch! she fell upon her knees, reminded
+him that he had promised to
+marry her, that her parents were honest!&mdash;What
+did it avail?&mdash;She was turned
+out.</p>
+
+<p>"She approached her father's door,
+in the skirts of London,&mdash;listened at
+the shutters,&mdash;but could not knock. A
+watchman had observed her go and
+return several times&mdash;Poor wretch!&mdash;<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads '['">"</ins> The
+remorse Jemima spoke of, seemed
+to be stinging her to the soul, as she
+proceeded.<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads ']'">"</ins></p>
+
+<p>"She left it, and, approaching a
+tub where horses were watered, she
+sat down in it, and, with desperate resolution,
+remained in that attitude&mdash;till
+resolution was no longer necessary!</p>
+
+<p>"I happened that morning to be
+going out to wash, anticipating the
+moment when I should escape from<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-119" id="APg_1-119"></a>[<a href="images/v1-119.png">119</a>]</span>
+such hard labour. I passed by, just as
+some men, going to work, drew out
+the stiff, cold corpse&mdash;Let me not recal
+the horrid moment!&mdash;I recognized
+her pale visage; I listened to the tale
+told by the spectators, and my heart
+did not burst. I thought of my own
+state, and wondered how I could be
+such a monster!&mdash;I worked hard; and,
+returning home, I was attacked by a
+fever. I suffered both in body and mind.
+I determined not to live with the
+wretch. But he did not try me; he
+left the neighbourhood. I once more
+returned to the wash-tub.</p>
+
+<p>"Still this state, miserable as it was,
+admitted of aggravation. Lifting one
+day a heavy load, a tub fell against my
+shin, and gave me great pain. I did
+not pay much attention to the hurt,
+till it became a serious wound; being<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-120" id="APg_1-120"></a>[<a href="images/v1-120.png">120</a>]</span>
+obliged to work as usual, or starve.
+But, finding myself at length unable
+to stand for any time, I thought of
+getting into an hospital. Hospitals, it
+should seem (for they are comfortless
+abodes for the sick) were expressly endowed
+for the reception of the friendless;
+yet I, who had on that plea a
+right to assistance, wanted the recommendation
+of the rich and respectable,
+and was several weeks languishing for admittance;
+fees were demanded on entering;
+and, what was still more unreasonable,
+security for burying me, that expence
+not coming into the letter of the
+charity. A guinea was the stipulated sum&mdash;I
+could as soon have raised a million;
+and I was afraid to apply to the parish
+for an order, lest they should have
+passed me, I knew not whither. The
+poor woman at whose house I lodged,
+compassionating my state, got me into<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-121" id="APg_1-121"></a>[<a href="images/v1-121.png">121</a>]</span>
+the hospital; and the family where I
+received the hurt, sent me five shillings,
+three and six-pence of which I gave at
+my admittance&mdash;I know not for what.</p>
+
+<p>"My leg grew quickly better; but
+I was dismissed before my cure was
+completed, because I could not afford
+to have my linen washed to appear decently,
+as the virago of a nurse said,
+when the gentlemen (the surgeons)
+came. I cannot give you an adequate
+idea of the wretchedness of an hospital;
+every thing is left to the care of people
+intent on gain. The attendants seem
+to have lost all feeling of compassion in
+the bustling discharge of their offices;
+death is so familiar to them, that they
+are not anxious to ward it off. Every
+thing appeared to be conducted for the
+accommodation of the medical men
+and their pupils, who came to make<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-122" id="APg_1-122"></a>[<a href="images/v1-122.png">122</a>]</span>
+experiments on the poor, for the benefit
+of the rich. One of the physicians,
+I must not forget to mention, gave me
+half-a-crown, and ordered me some
+wine, when I was at the lowest ebb. I
+thought of making my case known to
+the lady-like matron; but her forbidding
+countenance prevented me. She
+condescended to look on the patients,
+and make general enquiries, two or
+three times a week; but the nurses
+knew the hour when the visit of ceremony
+would commence, and every
+thing was as it should be.</p>
+
+<p>"After my dismission, I was more at
+a loss than ever for a subsistence, and,
+not to weary you with a repetition of
+the same unavailing attempts, unable
+to stand at the washing-tub, I began to
+consider the rich and poor as natural
+enemies, and became a thief from prin<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-123" id="APg_1-123"></a>[<a href="images/v1-123.png">123</a>]</span>ciple.
+I could not now cease to reason,
+but I hated mankind. I despised myself,
+yet I justified my conduct. I was
+taken, tried, and condemned to six
+months' imprisonment in a house of
+correction. My soul recoils with horror
+from the remembrance of the insults I
+had to endure, till, branded with shame,
+I was turned loose in the street, pennyless.
+I wandered from street to street,
+till, exhausted by hunger and fatigue, I
+sunk down senseless at a door, where
+I had vainly demanded a morsel of
+bread. I was sent by the inhabitant to
+the work-house, to which he had surlily
+bid me go, saying, he 'paid enough
+in conscience to the poor,' when, with
+parched tongue, I implored his charity.
+If those well-meaning people who exclaim
+against beggars, were acquainted
+with the treatment the poor receive in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-124" id="APg_1-124"></a>[<a href="images/v1-124.png">124</a>]</span>
+many of these wretched asylums, they
+would not stifle so easily involuntary
+sympathy, by saying that they have all
+parishes to go to, or wonder that the
+poor dread to enter the gloomy walls.
+What are the common run of work-houses,
+but prisons, in which many
+respectable old people, worn out by
+immoderate labour, sink into the grave
+in sorrow, to which they are carried
+like dogs!"</p>
+
+<p>Alarmed by some indistinct noise,
+Jemima rose hastily to listen, and Maria,
+turning to Darnford, said, "I have indeed
+been shocked beyond expression
+when I have met a pauper's funeral. A
+coffin carried on the shoulders of three
+or four ill-looking wretches, whom the
+imagination might easily convert into a
+band of assassins, hastening to conceal
+the corpse, and quarrelling about the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-125" id="APg_1-125"></a>[<a href="images/v1-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+prey on their way. I know it is of
+little consequence how we are consigned
+to the earth; but I am led by
+this brutal insensibility, to what even
+the animal creation appears forcibly to
+feel, to advert to the wretched, deserted
+manner in which they died."</p>
+
+<p>"True," rejoined Darnford, "and,
+till the rich will give more than a part
+of their wealth, till they will give time
+and attention to the wants of the distressed,
+never let them boast of charity.
+Let them open their hearts, and not
+their purses, and employ their minds
+in the service, if they are really actuated
+by humanity; or charitable institutions
+will always be the prey of the
+lowest order of knaves."</p>
+
+<p>Jemima returning, seemed in haste
+to finish her tale. "The overseer
+farmed the poor of different parishes,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-126" id="APg_1-126"></a>[<a href="images/v1-126.png">126</a>]</span>
+and out of the bowels of poverty was
+wrung the money with which he purchased
+this dwelling, as a private receptacle
+for madness. He had been
+a keeper at a house of the same description,
+and conceived that he could
+make money much more readily in his
+old occupation. He is a shrewd&mdash;shall
+I say it?&mdash;villain. He observed something
+resolute in my manner, and offered
+to take me with him, and instruct
+me how to treat the disturbed minds he
+meant to intrust to my care. The
+offer of forty pounds a year, and to quit
+a workhouse, was not to be despised,
+though the condition of shutting my
+eyes and hardening my heart was annexed
+to it.</p>
+
+<p>"I agreed to accompany him; and
+four years have I been attendant on
+many wretches, and"&mdash;she lowered<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-127" id="APg_1-127"></a>[<a href="images/v1-127.png">127</a>]</span>
+her voice,&mdash;"the witness of many
+enormities. In solitude my mind
+seemed to recover its force, and many
+of the sentiments which I imbibed in
+the only tolerable period of my life, returned
+with their full force. Still
+what should induce me to be the champion
+for suffering humanity?&mdash;Who
+ever risked any thing for me?&mdash;Who
+ever acknowledged me to be a fellow-creature?"&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Maria took her hand, and Jemima,
+more overcome by kindness than she
+had ever been by cruelty, hastened out
+of the room to conceal her emotions.</p>
+
+<p>Darnford soon after heard his summons,
+and, taking leave of him, Maria
+promised to gratify his curiosity,
+with respect to herself, the first
+opportunity.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_114-A_5" id="AFootnote_114-A_5"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_114-A_5"><span class="label">[114-A]</span></a> The copy which appears to have received the
+author's last corrections, ends at this place.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-128" id="APg_1-128"></a>[<a href="images/v1-128.png">128</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_VI" id="ACHAP_VI"></a>CHAP. VI.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Active</span> as love was in the heart
+of Maria, the story she had just heard
+made her thoughts take a wider range.
+The opening buds of hope closed, as
+if they had put forth too early, and the
+the happiest day of her life was overcast
+by the most melancholy reflections.
+Thinking of Jemima's peculiar fate
+and her own, she was led to consider
+the oppressed state of women, and to
+lament that she had given birth to a
+daughter. Sleep fled from her eyelids,
+while she dwelt on the wretchedness
+of unprotected infancy, till sympathy
+with Jemima changed to agony,
+when it seemed probable that her own<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-129" id="APg_1-129"></a>[<a href="images/v1-129.png">129</a>]</span>
+babe might even now be in the very
+state she so forcibly described.</p>
+
+<p>Maria thought, and thought again.
+Jemima's humanity had rather been
+benumbed than killed, by the keen
+frost she had to brave at her entrance
+into life; an appeal then to her feelings,
+on this tender point, surely
+would not be fruitless; and Maria began
+to anticipate the delight it would
+afford her to gain intelligence of her
+child. This project was now the only
+subject of reflection; and she watched
+impatiently for the dawn of day, with
+that determinate purpose which generally
+insures success.</p>
+
+<p>At the usual hour, Jemima brought
+her breakfast, and a tender note from
+Darnford. She ran her eye hastily over
+it, and her heart calmly hoarded up
+the rapture a fresh assurance of affec<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-130" id="APg_1-130"></a>[<a href="images/v1-130.png">130</a>]</span>tion,
+affection such as she wished to
+inspire, gave her, without diverting her
+mind a moment from its design. While
+Jemima waited to take away the
+breakfast, Maria alluded to the reflections,
+that had haunted her during the
+night to the exclusion of sleep. She
+spoke with energy of Jemima's unmerited
+sufferings, and of the fate of a
+number of deserted females, placed
+within the sweep of a whirlwind, from
+which it was next to impossible to
+escape. Perceiving the effect her conversation
+produced on the countenance
+of her guard, she grasped the arm of
+Jemima with that irresistible warmth
+which defies repulse, exclaiming&mdash;"With
+your heart, and such dreadful
+experience, can you lend your aid to
+deprive my babe of a mother's tenderness,
+a mother's care? In the name<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-131" id="APg_1-131"></a>[<a href="images/v1-131.png">131</a>]</span>
+of God, assist me to snatch her from
+destruction! Let me but give her an
+education&mdash;let me but prepare her
+body and mind to encounter the ills
+which await her sex, and I will teach
+her to consider you as her second mother,
+and herself as the prop of your
+age. Yes, Jemima, look at me&mdash;observe
+me closely, and read my very soul;
+you merit a better fate;" she held out
+her hand with a firm gesture of assurance;
+"and I will procure it for you,
+as a testimony of my esteem, as well as
+of my gratitude."</p>
+
+<p>Jemima had not power to resist this
+persuasive torrent; and, owning that
+the house in which she was confined,
+was situated on the banks of the
+Thames, only a few miles from London,
+and not on the sea-coast, as Darnford
+had supposed, she promised to in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-132" id="APg_1-132"></a>[<a href="images/v1-132.png">132</a>]</span>vent
+some excuse for her absence, and
+go herself to trace the situation, and
+enquire concerning the health, of this
+abandoned daughter. Her manner
+implied an intention to do something
+more, but she seemed unwilling to
+impart her design; and Maria, glad to
+have obtained the main point, thought
+it best to leave her to the workings of
+her own mind; convinced that she had
+the power of interesting her still more
+in favour of herself and child, by a
+simple recital of facts.</p>
+
+<p>In the evening, Jemima informed the
+impatient mother, that on the morrow
+she should hasten to town before the family
+hour of rising, and received all
+the information necessary, as a clue to
+her search. The "Good night!" Maria
+uttered was peculiarly solemn and
+affectionate. Glad expectation spar<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-133" id="APg_1-133"></a>[<a href="images/v1-133.png">133</a>]</span>kled
+in her eye; and, for the first time
+since her detention, she pronounced
+the name of her child with pleasureable
+fondness; and, with all the garrulity
+of a nurse, described her first
+smile when she recognized her mother.
+Recollecting herself, a still
+kinder "Adieu!" with a "God
+bless you!"&mdash;that seemed to include
+a maternal benediction, dismissed
+Jemima.</p>
+
+<p>The dreary solitude of the ensuing
+day, lengthened by impatiently dwelling
+on the same idea, was intolerably
+wearisome. She listened for the sound
+of a particular clock, which some directions
+of the wind allowed her to
+hear distinctly. She marked the shadow
+gaining on the wall; and, twilight
+thickening into darkness, her breath
+seemed oppressed while she anxiously<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-134" id="APg_1-134"></a>[<a href="images/v1-134.png">134</a>]</span>
+counted nine.&mdash;The last sound was a
+stroke of despair on her heart; for she
+expected every moment, without seeing
+Jemima, to have her light extinguished
+by the savage female who supplied
+her place. She was even obliged
+to prepare for bed, restless as she was,
+not to disoblige her new attendant.
+She had been cautioned not to speak
+too freely to her; but the caution was
+needless, her countenance would still
+more emphatically have made her
+shrink back. Such was the ferocity of
+manner, conspicuous in every word
+and gesture of this hag, that Maria was
+afraid to enquire, why Jemima, who
+had faithfully promised to see her before
+her door was shut for the night, came
+not?&mdash;and, when the key turned in the
+lock, to consign her to a night of suspence,
+she felt a degree of anguish<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-135" id="APg_1-135"></a>[<a href="images/v1-135.png">135</a>]</span>
+which the circumstances scarcely justified.</p>
+
+<p>Continually on the watch, the shutting
+of a door, or the sound of a footstep,
+made her start and tremble with
+apprehension, something like what she
+felt, when, at her entrance, dragged
+along the gallery, she began to doubt
+whether she were not surrounded by
+demons?</p>
+
+<p>Fatigued by an endless rotation of
+thought and wild alarms, she looked
+like a spectre, when Jemima entered
+in the morning; especially as her eyes
+darted out of her head, to read in Jemima's
+countenance, almost as pallid,
+the intelligence she dared not trust her
+tongue to demand. Jemima put down
+the tea-things, and appeared very busy
+in arranging the table. Maria took up
+a cup with trembling hand, then for<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-136" id="APg_1-136"></a>[<a href="images/v1-136.png">136</a>]</span>cibly
+recovering her fortitude, and restraining
+the convulsive movement
+which agitated the muscles of her
+mouth, she said, "Spare yourself the
+pain of preparing me for your information,
+I adjure you!&mdash;My child is dead!"
+Jemima solemnly answered, "Yes;"
+with a look expressive of compassion
+and angry emotions. "Leave me,"
+added Maria, making a fresh effort to
+govern her feelings, and hiding her face
+in her handkerchief, to conceal her anguish&mdash;"It
+is enough&mdash;I know that my
+babe is no more&mdash;I will hear the particulars
+when I am"&mdash;<i>calmer</i>, she could not
+utter; and Jemima, without importuning
+her by idle attempts to console her,
+left the room.</p>
+
+<p>Plunged in the deepest melancholy,
+she would not admit Darnford's visits;
+and such is the force of early associa<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-137" id="APg_1-137"></a>[<a href="images/v1-137.png">137</a>]</span>tions
+even on strong minds, that, for
+a while, she indulged the superstitious
+notion that she was justly punished by
+the death of her child, for having for an
+instant ceased to regret her loss. Two
+or three letters from Darnford, full of
+soothing, manly tenderness, only added
+poignancy to these accusing emotions;
+yet the passionate style in which he expressed,
+what he termed the first and
+fondest wish of his heart, "that his affection
+might make her some amends
+for the cruelty and injustice she had endured,"
+inspired a sentiment of gratitude
+to heaven; and her eyes filled
+with delicious tears, when, at the conclusion
+of his letter, wishing to supply
+the place of her unworthy relations,
+whose want of principle he execrated,
+he assured her, calling her his dearest
+girl, "that it should henceforth be the
+business of his life to make her happy."</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-138" id="APg_1-138"></a>[<a href="images/v1-138.png">138</a>]</span>
+He begged, in a note sent the following
+morning, to be permitted to see
+her, when his presence would be no intrusion
+on her grief; and so earnestly
+intreated to be allowed, according to
+promise, to beguile the tedious moments
+of absence, by dwelling on the
+events of her past life, that she sent him
+the memoirs which had been written
+for her daughter, promising Jemima the
+perusal as soon as he returned them.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-139" id="APg_1-139"></a>[<a href="images/v1-139.png">139</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_VII" id="ACHAP_VII"></a>CHAP. VII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">Addressing</span> these memoirs to
+you, my child, uncertain whether I
+shall ever have an opportunity of instructing
+you, many observations will
+probably flow from my heart, which
+only a mother&mdash;a mother schooled in
+misery, could make.</p>
+
+<p>"The tenderness of a father who knew
+the world, might be great; but could it
+equal that of a mother&mdash;of a mother,
+labouring under a portion of the misery,
+which the constitution of society seems
+to have entailed on all her kind? It is,
+my child, my dearest daughter, only
+such a mother, who will dare to break
+through all restraint to provide for your
+happiness&mdash;who will voluntarily brave<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-140" id="APg_1-140"></a>[<a href="images/v1-140.png">140</a>]</span>
+censure herself, to ward off sorrow from
+your bosom. From my narrative, my
+dear girl, you may gather the instruction,
+the counsel, which is meant rather
+to exercise than influence your
+mind.&mdash;Death may snatch me from you,
+before you can weigh my advice, or
+enter into my reasoning: I would then,
+with fond anxiety, lead you very early
+in life to form your grand principle of
+action, to save you from the vain regret
+of having, through irresolution, let the
+spring-tide of existence pass away, unimproved,
+unenjoyed.&mdash;Gain experience&mdash;ah!
+gain it&mdash;while experience is
+worth having, and acquire sufficient
+fortitude to pursue your own happiness;
+it includes your utility, by a direct path.
+What is wisdom too often, but the
+owl of the goddess, who sits moping
+in a desolated heart; around me she<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-141" id="APg_1-141"></a>[<a href="images/v1-141.png">141</a>]</span>
+shrieks, but I would invite all the gay
+warblers of spring to nestle in your
+blooming bosom.&mdash;Had I not wasted
+years in deliberating, after I ceased to
+doubt, how I ought to have acted&mdash;I
+might now be useful and happy.&mdash;For
+my sake, warned by my example, always
+appear what you are, and you
+will not pass through existence without
+enjoying its genuine blessings, love and
+respect.</p>
+
+<p>"Born in one of the most romantic
+parts of England, an enthusiastic fondness
+for the varying charms of nature
+is the first sentiment I recollect; or rather
+it was the first consciousness of
+pleasure that employed and formed my
+imagination.</p>
+
+<p>"My father had been a captain
+of a man of war; but, disgusted with
+the service, on account of the pre<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-142" id="APg_1-142"></a>[<a href="images/v1-142.png">142</a>]</span>ferment
+of men whose chief merit was
+their family connections or borough
+interest, he retired into the country;
+and, not knowing what to do with
+himself&mdash;married. In his family, to
+regain his lost consequence, he determined
+to keep up the same passive obedience,
+as in the vessels in which he had
+commanded. His orders were not to be
+disputed; and the whole house was expected
+to fly, at the word of command,
+as if to man the shrouds, or mount aloft
+in an elemental strife, big with life or
+death. He was to be instantaneously
+obeyed, especially by my mother, whom
+he very benevolently married for love;
+but took care to remind her of the obligation,
+when she dared, in the slightest
+instance, to question his absolute authority.
+My eldest brother, it is true, as
+he grew up, was treated with more re<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-143" id="APg_1-143"></a>[<a href="images/v1-143.png">143</a>]</span>spect
+by my father; and became in due
+form the deputy-tyrant of the house.
+The representative of my father, a being
+privileged by nature&mdash;a boy, and
+the darling of my mother, he did not
+fail to act like an heir apparent. Such
+indeed was my mother's extravagant
+partiality, that, in comparison with her
+affection for him, she might be said not
+to love the rest of her children. Yet
+none of the children seemed to have so
+little affection for her. Extreme indulgence
+had rendered him so selfish,
+that he only thought of himself; and
+from tormenting insects and animals, he
+became the despot of his brothers, and
+still more of his sisters.</p>
+
+<p>"It is perhaps difficult to give you an
+idea of the petty cares which obscured
+the morning of my life; continual restraint
+in the most trivial matters; un<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-144" id="APg_1-144"></a>[<a href="images/v1-144.png">144</a>]</span>conditional
+submission to orders, which,
+as a mere child, I soon discovered to be
+unreasonable, because inconsistent and
+contradictory. Thus are we destined
+to experience a mixture of bitterness,
+with the recollection of our most innocent
+enjoyments.</p>
+
+<p>"The circumstances which, during
+my childhood, occurred to fashion my
+mind, were various; yet, as it would
+probably afford me more pleasure to
+revive the fading remembrance of new-born
+delight, than you, my child, could
+feel in the perusal, I will not entice
+you to stray with me into the verdant
+meadow, to search for the flowers that
+youthful hopes scatter in every path;
+though, as I write, I almost scent the
+fresh green of spring&mdash;of that spring
+which never returns!</p>
+
+<p>"I had two sisters, and one brother,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-145" id="APg_1-145"></a>[<a href="images/v1-145.png">145</a>]</span>
+younger than myself; my brother Robert
+was two years older, and might
+truly be termed the idol of his parents,
+and the torment of the rest of the family.
+Such indeed is the force of prejudice,
+that what was called spirit and
+wit in him, was cruelly repressed as
+forwardness in me.</p>
+
+<p>"My mother had an indolence of
+character, which prevented her from
+paying much attention to our education.
+But the healthy breeze of a
+neighbouring heath, on which we
+bounded at pleasure, volatilized the
+humours that improper food might
+have generated. And to enjoy open
+air and freedom, was paradise, after
+the unnatural restraint of our fire-side,
+where we were often obliged to sit
+three or four hours together, without
+daring to utter a word, when my fa<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-146" id="APg_1-146"></a>[<a href="images/v1-146.png">146</a>]</span>ther
+was out of humour, from want of
+employment, or of a variety of boisterous
+amusement. I had however one
+advantage, an instructor, the brother
+of my father, who, intended for the
+church, had of course received a
+liberal education. But, becoming attached
+to a young lady of great beauty
+and large fortune, and acquiring in the
+world some opinions not consonant
+with the profession for which he was
+designed, he accepted, with the most
+sanguine expectations of success, the
+offer of a nobleman to accompany him
+to India, as his confidential secretary.</p>
+
+<p>"A correspondence was regularly
+kept up with the object of his affection;
+and the intricacies of business, peculiarly
+wearisome to a man of a romantic
+turn of mind, contributed, with a forced
+absence, to increase his attachment.<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-147" id="APg_1-147"></a>[<a href="images/v1-147.png">147</a>]</span>
+Every other passion was lost in this
+master-one, and only served to swell the
+torrent. Her relations, such were his
+waking dreams, who had despised him,
+would court in their turn his alliance,
+and all the blandishments of taste would
+grace the triumph of love.&mdash;While he
+basked in the warm sunshine of love,
+friendship also promised to shed its
+dewy freshness; for a friend, whom he
+loved next to his mistress, was the confident,
+who forwarded the letters from
+one to the other, to elude the observation
+of prying relations. A friend false
+in similar circumstances, is, my dearest
+girl, an old tale; yet, let not this example,
+or the frigid caution of cold-blooded
+moralists, make you endeavour
+to stifle hopes, which are the buds that
+naturally unfold themselves during the
+spring of life! Whilst your own heart<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-148" id="APg_1-148"></a>[<a href="images/v1-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+is sincere, always expect to meet one
+glowing with the same sentiments; for
+to fly from pleasure, is not to avoid
+pain!</p>
+
+<p>"My uncle realized, by good luck,
+rather than management, a handsome
+fortune; and returning on the wings of
+love, lost in the most enchanting reveries,
+to England, to share it with his
+mistress and his friend, he found them&mdash;united.</p>
+
+<p>"There were some circumstances, not
+necessary for me to recite, which aggravated
+the guilt of the friend beyond measure,
+and the deception, that had been carried
+on to the last moment, was so base,
+it produced the most violent effect on
+my uncle's health and spirits. His native
+country, the world! lately a garden of
+blooming sweets, blasted by treachery,
+seemed changed into a parched desert,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-149" id="APg_1-149"></a>[<a href="images/v1-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+the abode of hissing serpents. Disappointment
+rankled in his heart; and,
+brooding over his wrongs, he was attacked
+by a raging fever, followed by
+a derangement of mind, which only
+gave place to habitual melancholy, as
+he recovered more strength of body.</p>
+
+<p>"Declaring an intention never to
+marry, his relations were ever clustering
+about him, paying the grossest adulation
+to a man, who, disgusted with
+mankind, received them with scorn, or
+bitter sarcasms. Something in my
+countenance pleased him, when I began
+to prattle. Since his return, he appeared
+dead to affection; but I soon,
+by showing him innocent fondness, became
+a favourite; and endeavouring
+to enlarge and strengthen my mind, I
+grew dear to him in proportion as I imbibed
+his sentiments. He had a forcible<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-150" id="APg_1-150"></a>[<a href="images/v1-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+manner of speaking, rendered more
+so by a certain impressive wildness of
+look and gesture, calculated to engage
+the attention of a young and ardent
+mind. It is not then surprising that I
+quickly adopted his opinions in preference,
+and reverenced him as one of
+a superior order of beings. He inculcated,
+with great warmth, self-respect,
+and a lofty consciousness of acting
+right, independent of the censure or
+applause of the world; nay, he almost
+taught me to brave, and even despise
+its censure, when convinced of the rectitude
+of my own intentions.</p>
+
+<p>"Endeavouring to prove to me that
+nothing which deserved the name of
+love or friendship, existed in the world,
+he drew such animated pictures of his
+own feelings, rendered permanent by
+disappointment, as imprinted the sen<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-151" id="APg_1-151"></a>[<a href="images/v1-151.png">151</a>]</span>timents
+strongly on my heart, and animated
+my imagination. These remarks
+are necessary to elucidate some peculiarities
+in my character, which by the
+world are indefinitely termed romantic.</p>
+
+<p>"My uncle's increasing affection led
+him to visit me often. Still, unable to
+rest in any place, he did not remain
+long in the country to soften domestic
+tyranny; but he brought me books, for
+which I had a passion, and they conspired
+with his conversation, to make
+me form an ideal picture of life. I shall
+pass over the tyranny of my father,
+much as I suffered from it; but it is
+necessary to notice, that it undermined
+my mother's health; and that
+her temper, continually irritated by
+domestic bickering, became intolerably
+peevish.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-152" id="APg_1-152"></a>[<a href="images/v1-152.png">152</a>]</span>
+"My eldest brother was articled to a
+neighbouring attorney, the shrewdest,
+and, I may add, the most unprincipled
+man in that part of the country. As
+my brother generally came home every
+Saturday, to astonish my mother by
+exhibiting his attainments, he gradually
+assumed a right of directing the
+whole family, not excepting my father.
+He seemed to take a peculiar pleasure
+in tormenting and humbling me; and
+if I ever ventured to complain of this
+treatment to either my father or mother,
+I was rudely rebuffed for presuming
+to judge of the conduct of my eldest
+brother.</p>
+
+<p>"About this period a merchant's
+family came to settle in our neighbourhood.
+A mansion-house in the village,
+lately purchased, had been preparing
+the whole spring, and the sight of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-153" id="APg_1-153"></a>[<a href="images/v1-153.png">153</a>]</span>
+costly furniture, sent from London, had
+excited my mother's envy, and roused
+my father's pride. My sensations were
+very different, and all of a pleasurable
+kind. I longed to see new characters,
+to break the tedious monotony of my
+life; and to find a friend, such as fancy
+had pourtrayed. I cannot then describe
+the emotion I felt, the Sunday they
+made their appearance at church. My
+eyes were rivetted on the pillar round
+which I expected first to catch a glimpse
+of them, and darted forth to meet a
+servant who hastily preceded a group
+of ladies, whose white robes and waving
+plumes, seemed to stream along the
+gloomy aisle, diffusing the light, by
+which I contemplated their figures.</p>
+
+<p>"We visited them in form; and I
+quickly selected the eldest daughter for
+my friend. The second son, George,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-154" id="APg_1-154"></a>[<a href="images/v1-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+paid me particular attention, and finding
+his attainments and manners superior
+to those of the young men of the
+village, I began to imagine him superior
+to the rest of mankind. Had my home
+been more comfortable, or my previous
+acquaintance more numerous, I should
+not probably have been so eager to
+open my heart to new affections.</p>
+
+<p>"Mr. Venables, the merchant, had
+acquired a large fortune by unremitting
+attention to business; but his health declining
+rapidly, he was obliged to retire,
+before his son, George, had acquired
+sufficient experience, to enable
+him to conduct their affairs on the same
+prudential plan, his father had invariably
+pursued. Indeed, he had laboured
+to throw off his authority,
+having despised his narrow plans and
+cautious speculation. The eldest son<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-155" id="APg_1-155"></a>[<a href="images/v1-155.png">155</a>]</span>
+could not be prevailed on to enter the
+firm; and, to oblige his wife, and have
+peace in the house, Mr. Venables had
+purchased a commission for him in the
+guards.</p>
+
+<p>"I am now alluding to circumstances
+which came to my knowledge long
+after; but it is necessary, my dearest
+child, that you should know the character
+of your father, to prevent your
+despising your mother; the only parent
+inclined to discharge a parent's duty.
+In London, George had acquired habits
+of libertinism, which he carefully concealed
+from his father and his commercial
+connections. The mask he
+wore, was so complete a covering of
+his real visage, that the praise his father
+lavished on his conduct, and, poor
+mistaken man! on his principles, contrasted
+with his brother's, rendered the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-156" id="APg_1-156"></a>[<a href="images/v1-156.png">156</a>]</span>
+notice he took of me peculiarly flattering.
+Without any fixed design, as I
+am now convinced, he continued to
+single me out at the dance, press my
+hand at parting, and utter expressions
+of unmeaning passion, to which I gave
+a meaning naturally suggested by the
+romantic turn of my thoughts. His
+stay in the country was short; his manners
+did not entirely please me; but,
+when he left us, the colouring of my
+picture became more vivid&mdash;Whither
+did not my imagination lead me? In
+short, I fancied myself in love&mdash;in love
+with the disinterestedness, fortitude,
+generosity, dignity, and humanity, with
+which I had invested the hero I dubbed.
+A circumstance which soon after
+occurred, rendered all these virtues
+palpable. [The incident is perhaps
+worth relating on other accounts, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-157" id="APg_1-157"></a>[<a href="images/v1-157.png">157</a>]</span>
+therefore I shall describe it distinctly.]</p>
+
+<p>"I had a great affection for my nurse,
+old Mary, for whom I used often to
+work, to spare her eyes. Mary had a
+younger sister, married to a sailor, while
+she was suckling me; for my mother
+only suckled my eldest brother, which
+might be the cause of her extraordinary
+partiality. Peggy, Mary's sister, lived
+with her, till her husband, becoming a
+mate in a West-India trader, got a little
+before-hand in the world. He
+wrote to his wife from the first port in
+the Channel, after his most successful
+voyage, to request her to come to
+London to meet him; he even wished
+her to determine on living there for the
+future, to save him the trouble of coming
+to her the moment he came on
+shore; and to turn a penny by keeping<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-158" id="APg_1-158"></a>[<a href="images/v1-158.png">158</a>]</span>
+a green-stall. It was too much to set out
+on a journey the moment he had finished
+a voyage, and fifty miles by land, was
+worse than a thousand leagues by sea.</p>
+
+<p>"She packed up her alls, and came to
+London&mdash;but did not meet honest Daniel.
+A common misfortune prevented
+her, and the poor are bound to suffer
+for the good of their country&mdash;he was
+pressed in the river&mdash;and never came on
+shore.</p>
+
+<p>"Peggy was miserable in London,
+not knowing, as she said, 'the face of
+any living soul.' Besides, her imagination
+had been employed, anticipating
+a month or six weeks' happiness with
+her husband. Daniel was to have gone
+with her to Sadler's Wells, and Westminster
+Abbey, and to many sights,
+which he knew she never heard of in
+the country. Peggy too was thrifty,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-159" id="APg_1-159"></a>[<a href="images/v1-159.png">159</a>]</span>
+and how could she manage to put his
+plan in execution alone? He had acquaintance;
+but she did not know the
+very name of their places of abode.
+His letters were made up of&mdash;How do
+you does, and God bless yous,&mdash;information
+was reserved for the hour of
+meeting.</p>
+
+<p>"She too had her portion of information,
+near at heart. Molly and Jacky
+were grown such little darlings, she
+was almost angry that daddy did not
+see their tricks. She had not half the
+pleasure she should have had from their
+prattle, could she have recounted to
+him each night the pretty speeches of
+the day. Some stories, however, were
+stored up&mdash;and Jacky could say papa
+with such a sweet voice, it must delight
+his heart. Yet when she came, and
+found no Daniel to greet her, when<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-160" id="APg_1-160"></a>[<a href="images/v1-160.png">160</a>]</span>
+Jacky called papa, she wept, bidding
+'God bless his innocent soul, that
+did not know what sorrow was.'&mdash;But
+more sorrow was in store for Peggy,
+innocent as she was.&mdash;Daniel was killed
+in the first engagement, and then
+the <i>papa</i> was agony, sounding to the
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>"She had lived sparingly on his wages,
+while there was any hope of his return;
+but, that gone, she returned with a
+breaking heart to the country, to a
+little market town, nearly three miles
+from our village. She did not like to
+go to service, to be snubbed about,
+after being her own mistress. To put
+her children out to nurse was impossible:
+how far would her wages go? and
+to send them to her husband's parish, a
+distant one, was to lose her husband
+twice over.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-161" id="APg_1-161"></a>[<a href="images/v1-161.png">161</a>]</span>
+"I had heard all from Mary, and
+made my uncle furnish a little cottage
+for her, to enable her to sell&mdash;so sacred
+was poor Daniel's advice, now he was
+dead and gone&mdash;a little fruit, toys and
+cakes. The minding of the shop did
+not require her whole time, nor even
+the keeping her children clean, and
+she loved to see them clean; so she took
+in washing, and altogether made a shift
+to earn bread for her children, still
+weeping for Daniel, when Jacky's arch
+looks made her think of his father.&mdash;It
+was pleasant to work for her children.&mdash;'Yes;
+from morning till night,
+could she have had a kiss from their
+father, God rest his soul! Yes; had
+it <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'plased'">pleased</ins> Providence to have let him
+come back without a leg or an arm, it
+would have been the same thing to her&mdash;for
+she did not love him because he<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-162" id="APg_1-162"></a>[<a href="images/v1-162.png">162</a>]</span>
+maintained them&mdash;no; she had hands
+of her own.'</p>
+
+<p>"The country people were honest,
+and Peggy left her linen out to dry
+very late. A recruiting party, as she
+supposed, passing through, made free
+with a large wash; for it was all swept
+away, including her own and her children's
+little stock.</p>
+
+<p>"This was a dreadful blow; two dozen
+of shirts, stocks and handkerchiefs.
+She gave the money which she
+had laid by for half a year's rent, and
+promised to pay two shillings a week
+till all was cleared; so she did not lose
+her employment. This two shillings a
+week, and the buying a few necessaries
+for the children, drove her so hard,
+that she had not a penny to pay her rent
+with, when a twelvemonth's became
+due.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-163" id="APg_1-163"></a>[<a href="images/v1-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+"She was now with Mary, and had
+just told her tale, which Mary instantly
+repeated&mdash;it was intended for my
+ear. Many houses in this town, producing
+a borough-interest, were included
+in the estate purchased by Mr.
+Venables, and the attorney with whom
+my brother lived, was appointed his
+agent, to collect and raise the rents.</p>
+
+<p>"He demanded Peggy's, and, in
+spite of her intreaties, her poor goods
+had been seized and sold. So that she
+had not, and what was worse her children,
+'for she had known sorrow
+enough,' a bed to lie on. She knew
+that I was good-natured&mdash;right charitable,
+yet not liking to ask for more
+than needs must, she scorned to petition
+while people could any how be
+made to wait. But now, should she
+be turned out of doors, she must ex<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-164" id="APg_1-164"></a>[<a href="images/v1-164.png">164</a>]</span>pect
+nothing less than to lose all her
+customers, and then she must beg or
+starve&mdash;and what would become of her
+children?&mdash;'had Daniel not been
+pressed&mdash;but God knows best&mdash;all this
+could not have happened.'</p>
+
+<p>"I had two mattrasses on my bed;
+what did I want with two, when
+such a worthy creature must lie on the
+ground? My mother would be angry,
+but I could conceal it till my uncle
+came down; and then I would tell him
+all the whole truth, and if he absolved
+me, heaven would.</p>
+
+<p>"I begged the house-maid to come
+up stairs with me (servants always feel
+for the distresses of poverty, and so
+would the rich if they knew what it
+was). She assisted me to tie up the
+mattrass; I discovering, at the same
+time, that one blanket would serve me<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-165" id="APg_1-165"></a>[<a href="images/v1-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+till winter, could I persuade my sister,
+who slept with me, to keep my secret.
+She entering in the midst of the package,
+I gave her some new feathers, to
+silence her. We got the mattrass
+down the back stairs, unperceived,
+and I helped to carry it, taking with
+me all the money I had, and what I
+could borrow from my sister.</p>
+
+<p>"When I got to the cottage, Peggy
+declared that she would not take what
+I had brought secretly; but, when,
+with all the eager eloquence inspired
+by a decided purpose, I grasped her
+hand with weeping eyes, assuring her
+that my uncle would screen me from
+blame, when he was once more in the
+country, describing, at the same time,
+what she would suffer in parting with
+her children, after keeping them so
+long from being thrown on the parish,
+she reluctantly consented.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-166" id="APg_1-166"></a>[<a href="images/v1-166.png">166</a>]</span>
+"My project of usefulness ended not
+here; I determined to speak to the
+attorney; he frequently paid me compliments.
+His character did not intimidate
+me; but, imagining that Peggy
+must be mistaken, and that no man
+could turn a deaf ear to such a tale of
+complicated distress, I determined to
+walk to the town with Mary the next
+morning, and request him to wait for
+the rent, and keep my secret, till my
+uncle's return.</p>
+
+<p>"My repose was sweet; and, waking
+with the first dawn of day, I bounded
+to Mary's cottage. What charms do
+not a light heart spread over nature!
+Every bird that twittered in a bush,
+every flower that enlivened the hedge,
+seemed placed there to awaken me to
+rapture&mdash;yes; to rapture. The present
+moment was full fraught with happi<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-167" id="APg_1-167"></a>[<a href="images/v1-167.png">167</a>]</span>ness;
+and on futurity I bestowed not a
+thought, excepting to anticipate my
+success with the attorney.</p>
+
+<p>"This man of the world, with rosy
+face and simpering features, received
+me politely, nay kindly; listened with
+complacency to my remonstrances,
+though he scarcely heeded Mary's tears.
+I did not then suspect, that my eloquence
+was in my complexion, the
+blush of seventeen, or that, in a world
+where humanity to women is the characteristic
+of advancing civilization, the
+beauty of a young girl was so much
+more interesting than the distress of an
+old one. Pressing my hand, he promised
+to let Peggy remain in the house
+as long as I wished.&mdash;I more than returned
+the pressure&mdash;I was so grateful
+and so happy. Emboldened by my innocent
+warmth, he then kissed me<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-168" id="APg_1-168"></a>[<a href="images/v1-168.png">168</a>]</span>&mdash;and
+I did not draw back&mdash;I took it for
+a kiss of charity.</p>
+
+<p>"Gay as a lark, I went to dine at Mr.
+Venables'. I had previously obtained
+five shillings from my father, towards
+re-clothing the poor children of my
+care, and prevailed on my mother to
+take one of the girls into the house, whom
+I determined to teach to work and read.</p>
+
+<p>"After dinner, when the younger part
+of the circle retired to the music room,
+I recounted with energy my tale; that
+is, I mentioned Peggy's distress, without
+hinting at the steps I had taken to
+relieve her. Miss Venables gave me
+half-a-crown; the heir five shillings;
+but George sat unmoved. I was cruelly
+distressed by the disappointment&mdash;I
+scarcely could remain on my chair;
+and, could I have got out of the room
+unperceived, I should have flown home,
+as if to run away from myself. After<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-169" id="APg_1-169"></a>[<a href="images/v1-169.png">169</a>]</span>
+several vain attempts to rise, I leaned
+my head against the marble chimney-piece,
+and gazing on the evergreens
+that filled the fire-place, moralized on
+the vanity of human expectations; regardless
+of the company. I was roused
+by a gentle tap on my shoulder from
+behind Charlotte's chair. I turned
+my head, and George slid a guinea into
+my hand, putting his finger to his
+mouth, to enjoin me silence.</p>
+
+<p>"What a revolution took place, not
+only in my train of thoughts, but feelings!
+I trembled with emotion&mdash;now,
+indeed, I was in love. Such delicacy
+too, to enhance his benevolence! I felt
+in my pocket every five minutes, only
+to feel the guinea; and its magic touch
+invested my hero with more than mortal
+beauty. My fancy had found a basis
+to erect its model of perfection on;<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-170" id="APg_1-170"></a>[<a href="images/v1-170.png">170</a>]</span>
+and quickly went to work, with all the
+happy credulity of youth, to consider
+that heart as devoted to virtue, which
+had only obeyed a virtuous impulse.
+The bitter experience was yet to come,
+that has taught me how very distinct
+are the principles of virtue, from the
+casual feelings from which they germinate.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-171" id="APg_1-171"></a>[<a href="images/v1-171.png">171</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_VIII" id="ACHAP_VIII"></a>CHAP. VIII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">I have</span> perhaps dwelt too long on
+a circumstance, which is only of importance
+as it marks the progress of a
+deception that has been so fatal to my
+peace; and introduces to your notice a
+poor girl, whom, intending to serve, I led
+to ruin. Still it is probable that I was
+not entirely the victim of mistake; and
+that your father, gradually fashioned
+by the world, did not quickly become
+what I hesitate to call him&mdash;out of
+respect to my daughter.</p>
+
+<p>"But, to hasten to the more busy
+scenes of my life. Mr. Venables and
+my mother died the same summer;
+and, wholly engrossed by my attention
+to her, I thought of little else.
+The neglect of her darling, my brother
+Robert, had a violent effect on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-172" id="APg_1-172"></a>[<a href="images/v1-172.png">172</a>]</span>
+her weakened mind; for, though boys
+may be reckoned the pillars of the
+house without doors, girls are often the
+only comfort within. They but too frequently
+waste their health and spirits
+attending a dying parent, who leaves
+them in comparative poverty. After
+closing, with filial piety, a father's
+eyes, they are chased from the paternal
+roof, to make room for the first-born,
+the son, who is to carry the
+empty family-name down to posterity;
+though, occupied with his own pleasures,
+he scarcely thought of discharging,
+in the decline of his parent's life,
+the debt contracted in his childhood.
+My mother's conduct led me to make
+these reflections. Great as was the fatigue
+I endured, and the affection my
+unceasing solicitude evinced, of which
+my mother seemed perfectly sensible,
+still, when my brother, whom I could<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-173" id="APg_1-173"></a>[<a href="images/v1-173.png">173</a>]</span>
+hardly persuade to remain a quarter of
+an hour in her chamber, was with her
+alone, a short time before her death,
+she gave him a little hoard, which she
+had been some years accumulating.</p>
+
+<p>"During my mother's illness, I was
+obliged to manage my father's temper,
+who, from the lingering nature of her
+malady, began to imagine that it was
+merely fancy. At this period, an artful
+kind of upper servant attracted my
+father's attention, and the neighbours
+made many remarks on the finery, not
+honestly got, exhibited at evening service.
+But I was too much occupied
+with my mother to observe any change
+in her dress or behaviour, or to listen to
+the whisper of scandal.</p>
+
+<p>"I shall not dwell on the death-bed
+scene, lively as is the remembrance,
+or on the emotion produced by the last<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-174" id="APg_1-174"></a>[<a href="images/v1-174.png">174</a>]</span>
+grasp of my mother's cold hand; when
+blessing me, she added, 'A little patience,
+and all will be over!' Ah!
+my child, how often have those words
+rung mournfully in my ears&mdash;and I
+have exclaimed&mdash;'A little more patience,
+and I too shall be at rest!'</p>
+
+<p>"My father was violently affected
+by her death, recollected instances of
+his unkindness, and wept like a child.</p>
+
+<p>"My mother had solemnly recommended
+my sisters to my care, and bid
+me be a mother to them. They, indeed,
+became more dear to me as they
+became more forlorn; for, during my
+mother's illness, I discovered the ruined
+state of my father's circumstances,
+and that he had only been able to keep
+up appearances, by the sums which he
+borrowed of my uncle.</p>
+
+<p>"My father's grief, and consequent<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-175" id="APg_1-175"></a>[<a href="images/v1-175.png">175</a>]</span>
+tenderness to his children, quickly
+abated, the house grew still more
+gloomy or riotous; and my refuge
+from care was again at Mr. Venables';
+the young 'squire having taken his father's
+place, and allowing, for the present,
+his sister to preside at his table.
+George, though dissatisfied with his
+portion of the fortune, which had till
+lately been all in trade, visited the family
+as usual. He was now full of speculations
+in trade, and his brow became
+clouded by care. He seemed to relax
+in his attention to me, when the presence
+of my uncle gave a new turn to
+his behaviour. I was too unsuspecting,
+too disinterested, to trace these changes
+to their source.</p>
+
+<p>My home every day became more
+and more disagreeable to me; my liberty
+was unnecessarily abridged, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-176" id="APg_1-176"></a>[<a href="images/v1-176.png">176</a>]</span>
+my books, on the pretext that they made
+me idle, taken from me. My father's
+mistress was with child, and he, doating
+on her, allowed or overlooked her
+vulgar manner of tyrannizing over us.
+I was indignant, especially when I saw
+her endeavouring to attract, shall I
+say seduce? my younger brother. By
+allowing women but one way of rising
+in the world, the fostering the libertinism
+of men, society makes monsters
+of them, and then their ignoble
+vices are brought forward as a proof of
+inferiority of intellect.</p>
+
+<p>The wearisomeness of my situation
+can scarcely be described. Though my
+life had not passed in the most even tenour
+with my mother, it was paradise
+to that I was destined to endure with
+my father's mistress, jealous of her illegitimate
+authority. My father's former<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-177" id="APg_1-177"></a>[<a href="images/v1-177.png">177</a>]</span>
+occasional tenderness, in spite of his
+violence of temper, had been soothing
+to me; but now he only met me with
+reproofs or portentous frowns. The
+house-keeper, as she was now termed,
+was the vulgar despot of the family;
+and assuming the new character of a
+fine lady, she could never forgive the
+contempt which was sometimes visible
+in my countenance, when she uttered
+with pomposity her bad English, or
+affected to be well bred.</p>
+
+<p>To my uncle I ventured to open my
+heart; and he, with his wonted benevolence,
+began to consider in what
+manner he could extricate me out of
+my present irksome situation. In spite
+of his own disappointment, or, most
+probably, actuated by the feelings that
+had been petrified, not cooled, in all
+their sanguine fervour, like a boiling
+torrent of lava suddenly dashing into<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-178" id="APg_1-178"></a>[<a href="images/v1-178.png">178</a>]</span>
+the sea, he thought a marriage of mutual
+inclination (would envious stars
+permit it) the only chance for happiness
+in this disastrous world. George
+Venables had the reputation of being
+attentive to business, and my father's
+example gave great weight to this circumstance;
+for habits of order in business
+would, he conceived, extend to
+the regulation of the affections in domestic
+life. George seldom spoke in
+my uncle's company, except to utter a
+short, judicious question, or to make a
+pertinent remark, with all due deference
+to his superior judgment; so that
+my uncle seldom left his company without
+observing, that the young man had
+more in him than people supposed.</p>
+
+<p>In this opinion he was not singular;
+yet, believe me, and I am not swayed
+by resentment, these speeches so justly<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-179" id="APg_1-179"></a>[<a href="images/v1-179.png">179</a>]</span>
+poized, this silent deference, when the
+animal spirits of other young people
+were throwing off youthful ebullitions,
+were not the effect of thought or humility,
+but sheer barrenness of mind,
+and want of imagination. A colt of
+mettle will curvet and shew his paces.
+Yes; my dear girl, these prudent
+young men want all the fire necessary
+to ferment their faculties, and are characterized
+as wise, only because they
+are not foolish. It is true, that George
+was by no means so great a favourite
+of mine as during the first year of our
+acquaintance; still, as he often coincided
+in opinion with me, and echoed
+my sentiments; and having myself no
+other attachment, I heard with pleasure
+my uncle's proposal; but thought
+more of obtaining my freedom, than
+of my lover. But, when George, seem<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-180" id="APg_1-180"></a>[<a href="images/v1-180.png">180</a>]</span>ingly
+anxious for my happiness, pressed
+me to quit my present painful situation,
+my heart swelled with gratitude&mdash;I
+knew not that my uncle had promised
+him five thousand pounds.</p>
+
+<p>Had this truly generous man mentioned
+his intention to me, I should have insisted
+on a thousand pounds being settled
+on each of my sisters; George would
+have contested; I should have seen his
+selfish soul; and&mdash;gracious God! have
+been spared the misery of discovering,
+when too late, that I was united to a
+heartless, unprincipled wretch. All
+my schemes of usefulness would not
+then have been blasted. The tenderness
+of my heart would not have heated
+my imagination with visions of the
+ineffable delight of happy love; nor
+would the sweet duty of a mother have
+been so cruelly interrupted.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-181" id="APg_1-181"></a>[<a href="images/v1-181.png">181</a>]</span>
+But I must not suffer the fortitude
+I have so hardly acquired, to be undermined
+by unavailing regret. Let me
+hasten forward to describe the turbid
+stream in which I had to wade&mdash;but
+let me exultingly declare that it is
+passed&mdash;my soul holds fellowship with
+him no more. He cut the Gordian
+knot, which my principles, mistaken
+ones, respected; he dissolved the tie, the
+fetters rather, that ate into my very
+vitals&mdash;and I should rejoice, conscious
+that my mind is freed, though confined
+in hell itself; the only place that even
+fancy can imagine more dreadful than
+my present abode.</p>
+
+<p>These varying emotions will not allow
+me to proceed. I heave sigh after
+sigh; yet my heart is still oppressed.
+For what am I reserved? Why was I not
+born a man, or why was I born at all?</p>
+
+
+<h4>END OF VOL. I.</h4>
+<hr class="full" />
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-i_S" id="APg_1-i_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h1><a name="V1S" id="V1S"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>VOL. I.</h2>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-ii_S" id="APg_1-ii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-iii_S" id="APg_1-iii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. I.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-iv_S" id="APg_1-iv_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-v_S" id="APg_1-v_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>THE</h3>
+
+<h1>WRONGS OF WOMAN:</h1>
+
+<h3>OR,</h3>
+
+<h1>MARIA.</h1>
+
+<h2>A FRAGMENT.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. I.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-vi_S" id="APg_1-vi_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-vii_S" id="APg_1-vii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-vii.png">vii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2><a name="AV1_PREFACE_S" id="AV1_PREFACE_S"></a>PREFACE.</h2>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> public are here pre&#383;ented with
+the la&#383;t literary attempt of an author,
+who&#383;e fame has been uncommonly exten&#383;ive,
+and who&#383;e talents have probably
+been mo&#383;t admired, by the per&#383;ons
+by whom talents are e&#383;timated
+with the greate&#383;t accuracy and di&#383;crimination.
+There are few, to whom
+her writings could in any ca&#383;e have<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-viii_S" id="APg_1-viii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-viii.png">viii</a>]</span>
+given plea&#383;ure, that would have wi&#383;hed
+that this fragment &#383;hould have been
+&#383;uppre&#383;&#383;ed, becau&#383;e it is a fragment.
+There is a &#383;entiment, very dear to minds
+of ta&#383;te and imagination, that finds a
+melancholy delight in contemplating
+the&#383;e unfini&#383;hed productions of genius,
+the&#383;e &#383;ketches of what, if they had
+been filled up in a manner adequate to
+the writer's conception, would perhaps
+have given a new impul&#383;e to the
+manners of a world.</p>
+
+<p>The purpo&#383;e and &#383;tructure of the
+following work, had long formed a
+favourite &#383;ubject of meditation with
+its author, and &#383;he judged them capable
+of producing an important effect.<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-ix_S" id="APg_1-ix_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-ix.png">ix</a>]</span>
+The compo&#383;ition had been in progre&#383;s
+for a period of twelve months. She
+was anxious to do ju&#383;tice to her conception,
+and recommenced and revi&#383;ed
+the manu&#383;cript &#383;everal different times.
+So much of it as is here given to the
+public, &#383;he was far from con&#383;idering
+as fini&#383;hed, and, in a letter to a friend
+directly written on this &#383;ubject, &#383;he
+&#383;ays, "I am perfectly aware that &#383;ome of
+the incidents ought to be tran&#383;po&#383;ed,
+and heightened by more harmonious
+&#383;hading; and I wi&#383;hed in &#383;ome degree
+to avail my&#383;elf of critici&#383;m, before I
+began to adju&#383;t my events into a &#383;tory,
+the outline of which I had &#383;ketched in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-x_S" id="APg_1-x_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-x.png">x</a>]</span>
+my mind<a name="AFNanchor_X-A_1_S" id="AFNanchor_X-A_1_S"></a><a href="#AFootnote_X-A_1_S" class="fnanchor">[x-A]</a>." The only friends to whom
+the author communicated her manu&#383;cript,
+were Mr. Dy&#383;on, the tran&#383;lator
+of the Sorcerer, and the pre&#383;ent editor;
+and it was impo&#383;&#383;ible for the mo&#383;t inexperienced
+author to di&#383;play a &#383;tronger
+de&#383;ire of profiting by the cen&#383;ures and
+&#383;entiments that might be &#383;ugge&#383;ted<a name="AFNanchor_X-B_2_S" id="AFNanchor_X-B_2_S"></a><a href="#AFootnote_X-B_2_S" class="fnanchor">[x-B]</a>.</p>
+
+<p>In revi&#383;ing the&#383;e &#383;heets for the pre&#383;s,
+it was nece&#383;&#383;ary for the editor, in &#383;ome
+places, to connect the more fini&#383;hed<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xi_S" id="APg_1-xi_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xi.png">xi</a>]</span>
+parts with the pages of an older copy,
+and a line or two in addition &#383;ometimes
+appeared requi&#383;ite for that purpo&#383;e.
+Wherever &#383;uch a liberty has been
+taken, the additional phra&#383;es will be
+found inclo&#383;ed in brackets; it being
+the editor's mo&#383;t earne&#383;t de&#383;ire, to
+intrude nothing of him&#383;elf into the
+work, but to give to the public the
+words, as well as ideas, of the real
+author.</p>
+
+<p>What follows in the en&#383;uing pages,
+is not a preface regularly drawn out
+by the author, but merely hints for a
+preface, which, though never filled up
+in the manner the writer intended,
+appeared to be worth pre&#383;erving.</p>
+
+<p class="right">W. GODWIN.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xii_S" id="APg_1-xii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xii.png">xii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xiii_S" id="APg_1-xiii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xiii.png">xiii</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="AAUTHORs_PREFACE_S" id="AAUTHORs_PREFACE_S"></a><span class="smcap">AUTHOR's PREFACE.</span></h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> Wrongs of Woman, like the
+wrongs of the oppre&#383;&#383;ed part of mankind,
+may be deemed nece&#383;&#383;ary by
+their oppre&#383;&#383;ors: but &#383;urely there are
+a few, who will dare to advance before
+the improvement of the age, and
+grant that my &#383;ketches are not the
+abortion of a di&#383;tempered fancy, or
+the &#383;trong delineations of a wounded
+heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xiv_S" id="APg_1-xiv_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xiv.png">xiv</a>]</span>In writing this novel, I have rather
+endeavoured to pourtray pa&#383;&#383;ions than
+manners.</p>
+
+<p>In many in&#383;tances I could have made
+the incidents more dramatic, would I
+have &#383;acrificed my main object, the
+de&#383;ire of exhibiting the mi&#383;ery and
+oppre&#383;&#383;ion, peculiar to women, that
+ari&#383;e out of the partial laws and cu&#383;toms
+of &#383;ociety.</p>
+
+<p>In the invention of the &#383;tory, this
+view re&#383;trained my fancy; and the
+hi&#383;tory ought rather to be con&#383;idered,
+as of woman, than of an individual.</p>
+
+<p>The &#383;entiments I have embodied.</p>
+
+<p>In many works of this &#383;pecies, the
+hero is allowed to be mortal, and to<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xv_S" id="APg_1-xv_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xv.png">xv</a>]</span>
+become wi&#383;e and virtuous as well as
+happy, by a train of events and circum&#383;tances.
+The heroines, on the
+contrary, are to be born immaculate;
+and to act like godde&#383;&#383;es of wi&#383;dom, ju&#383;t
+come forth highly fini&#383;hed Minervas
+from the head of Jove.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p>[The following is an extract of a
+letter from the author to a friend, to
+whom &#383;he communicated her manu&#383;cript.]</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>For my part, I cannot &#383;uppo&#383;e any
+&#383;ituation more di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ing, than for a<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xvi_S" id="APg_1-xvi_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xvi.png">xvi</a>]</span>
+woman of &#383;en&#383;ibility, with an improving
+mind, to be bound to &#383;uch a man
+as I have de&#383;cribed for life; obliged
+to renounce all the humanizing affections,
+and to avoid cultivating her
+ta&#383;te, le&#383;t her perception of grace and
+refinement of &#383;entiment, &#383;hould &#383;harpen
+to agony the pangs of di&#383;appointment.
+Love, in which the imagination
+mingles its bewitching colouring,
+mu&#383;t be fo&#383;tered by delicacy. I &#383;hould
+de&#383;pi&#383;e, or rather call her an ordinary
+woman, who could endure &#383;uch a hu&#383;band
+as I have &#383;ketched.</p>
+
+<p>The&#383;e appear to me (matrimonial
+de&#383;poti&#383;m of heart and conduct) to be
+the peculiar Wrongs of Woman, be<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xvii_S" id="APg_1-xvii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xvii.png">xvii</a>]</span>cau&#383;e
+they degrade the mind. What
+are termed great mi&#383;fortunes, may
+more forcibly impre&#383;s the mind of common
+readers; they have more of what
+may ju&#383;tly be termed <i>&#383;tage-effect</i>; but
+it is the delineation of finer &#383;en&#383;ations,
+which, in my opinion, con&#383;titutes the
+merit of our be&#383;t novels. This is what
+I have in view; and to &#383;how the
+wrongs of different cla&#383;&#383;es of women,
+equally oppre&#383;&#383;ive, though, from the
+difference of education, nece&#383;&#383;arily
+various.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_X-A_1_S" id="AFootnote_X-A_1_S"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_X-A_1_S"><span class="label">[x-A]</span></a> A more copious extract of this letter is &#383;ubjoined
+to the author's preface.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_X-B_2_S" id="AFootnote_X-B_2_S"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_X-B_2_S"><span class="label">[x-B]</span></a> The part communicated con&#383;i&#383;ted of the
+fir&#383;t fourteen chapters.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xviii_S" id="APg_1-xviii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xviii.png">xviii</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="AERRATA_S" id="AERRATA_S"></a>ERRATA.</h2>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p>Page 3, line 2, <i>dele</i> half.</p>
+
+<p>P. 81 and 118, <i>for</i> brackets [&mdash;], <i>read</i>
+inverted commas " thus "</p></div>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xix_S" id="APg_1-xix_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xix.png">xix</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="AV1_CONTENTS_S" id="AV1_CONTENTS_S"></a>CONTENTS.</h2>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap"><a href="#V1">VOL. I.</a> and <a href="#V2">II.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">The Wrongs of Woman, or Maria; a Fragment:
+to which is added, the Fir&#383;t Book
+of a Series of Le&#383;&#383;ons for Children.</p>
+
+<p class="center"><span class="smcap"><a href="#V3">VOL. III.</a> and <a href="#V4">IV.</a></span></p>
+
+<p class="center">Letters and Mi&#383;cellaneous Pieces.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-xx_S" id="APg_1-xx_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-xx.png">xx</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-1_S" id="APg_1-1_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3><a name="AV1_WRONGS_S" id="AV1_WRONGS_S"></a><i>WRONGS</i></h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_I_S" id="ACHAP_I_S"></a>CHAP. I.</h2>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Abodes</span> of horror have frequently
+been de&#383;cribed, and ca&#383;tles, filled with
+&#383;pectres and chimeras, conjured up by
+the magic &#383;pell of genius to harrow the
+&#383;oul, and ab&#383;orb the wondering mind.
+But, formed of &#383;uch &#383;tuff as dreams are
+made of, what were they to the man&#383;ion
+of de&#383;pair, in one corner of which
+Maria &#383;at, endeavouring to recal her
+&#383;cattered thoughts!</p>
+
+<p>Surpri&#383;e, a&#383;toni&#383;hment, that bordered
+on di&#383;traction, &#383;eemed to have &#383;u&#383;pend<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-2_S" id="APg_1-2_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-2.png">2</a>]</span>ed
+her faculties, till, waking by degrees
+to a keen &#383;en&#383;e of angui&#383;h, a
+whirlwind of rage and indignation
+rou&#383;ed her torpid pul&#383;e. One recollection
+with frightful velocity following
+another, threatened to fire her brain,
+and make her a fit companion for the
+terrific inhabitants, who&#383;e groans and
+&#383;hrieks were no un&#383;ub&#383;tantial &#383;ounds of
+whi&#383;tling winds, or &#383;tartled birds, modulated
+by a romantic fancy, which
+amu&#383;e while they affright; but &#383;uch
+tones of mi&#383;ery as carry a dreadful certainty
+directly to the heart. What
+effect mu&#383;t they then have produced on
+one, true to the touch of &#383;ympathy, and
+tortured by maternal apprehen&#383;ion<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '.!'">!</ins></p>
+
+<p>Her infant's image was continually
+floating on Maria's &#383;ight, and the fir&#383;t
+&#383;mile of intelligence remembered, as
+none but a mother, an unhappy mo<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-3_S" id="APg_1-3_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-3.png">3</a>]</span>ther,
+can conceive. She heard her half
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads 'speaking half'">&#383;peaking</ins> cooing, and felt the little
+twinkling fingers on her burning bo&#383;om&mdash;a
+bo&#383;om bur&#383;ting with the nutriment
+for which this cheri&#383;hed child
+might now be pining in vain. From
+a &#383;tranger &#383;he could indeed receive the
+maternal aliment, Maria was grieved
+at the thought&mdash;but who would watch
+her with a mother's tenderne&#383;s, a mother's
+&#383;elf-denial?</p>
+
+<p>The retreating &#383;hadows of former
+&#383;orrows ru&#383;hed back in a gloomy train,
+and &#383;eemed to be pictured on the walls
+of her pri&#383;on, magnified by the &#383;tate
+of mind in which they were viewed&mdash;Still
+&#383;he mourned for her child, lamented
+&#383;he was a daughter, and anticipated
+the aggravated ills of life that her &#383;ex
+rendered almo&#383;t inevitable, even while
+dreading &#383;he was no more. To think<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-4_S" id="APg_1-4_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+that &#383;he was blotted out of exi&#383;tence
+was agony, when the imagination had
+been long employed to expand her
+faculties; yet to &#383;uppo&#383;e her turned
+adrift on an unknown &#383;ea, was &#383;carcely
+le&#383;s afflicting.</p>
+
+<p>After being two days the prey of impetuous,
+varying emotions, Maria began
+to reflect more calmly on her pre&#383;ent
+&#383;ituation, for &#383;he had actually been rendered
+incapable of &#383;ober reflection, by
+the di&#383;covery of the act of atrocity of
+which &#383;he was the victim. She could
+not have imagined, that, in all the fermentation
+of civilized depravity, a &#383;imilar
+plot could have entered a human
+mind. She had been &#383;tunned by an unexpected
+blow; yet life, however joyle&#383;s,
+was not to be indolently re&#383;igned,
+or mi&#383;ery endured without exertion,
+and proudly termed patience. She<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-5_S" id="APg_1-5_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+had hitherto meditated only to point
+the dart of angui&#383;h, and &#383;uppre&#383;&#383;ed
+the heart heavings of indignant nature
+merely by the force of contempt. Now
+&#383;he endeavoured to brace her mind to
+fortitude, and to a&#383;k her&#383;elf what was
+to be her employment in her dreary
+cell? Was it not to effect her e&#383;cape,
+to fly to the &#383;uccour of her child, and
+to baffle the &#383;elfi&#383;h &#383;chemes of her tyrant&mdash;her
+hu&#383;band?</p>
+
+<p>The&#383;e thoughts rou&#383;ed her &#383;leeping
+&#383;pirit, and the &#383;elf-po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion returned,
+that &#383;eemed to have abandoned her in
+the infernal &#383;olitude into which &#383;he
+had been precipitated. The fir&#383;t emotions
+of overwhelming impatience began
+to &#383;ub&#383;ide, and re&#383;entment gave
+place to tenderne&#383;s, and more tranquil
+meditation; though anger once more
+&#383;topt the calm current of reflection<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '.'">,</ins><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-6_S" id="APg_1-6_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-6.png">6</a>]</span>
+when &#383;he attempted to move her manacled
+arms. But this was an outrage
+that could only excite momentary feelings
+of &#383;corn, which evaporated in a
+faint &#383;mile; for Maria was far from
+thinking a per&#383;onal in&#383;ult the mo&#383;t difficult
+to endure with magnanimous indifference.</p>
+
+<p>She approached the &#383;mall grated
+window of her chamber, and for a
+con&#383;iderable time only regarded the
+blue expan&#383;e; though it commanded
+a view of a de&#383;olate garden, and of
+part of a huge pile of buildings, that,
+after having been &#383;uffered, for half a
+century, to fall to decay, had undergone
+&#383;ome clum&#383;y repairs, merely to
+render it habitable. The ivy had been
+torn off the turrets, and the &#383;tones not
+wanted to patch up the breaches of
+time, and exclude the warring ele<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-7_S" id="APg_1-7_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-7.png">7</a>]</span>ments,
+left in heaps in the di&#383;ordered
+court. Maria contemplated this &#383;cene
+&#383;he knew not how long; or rather
+gazed on the walls, and pondered on
+her &#383;ituation. To the ma&#383;ter of this
+mo&#383;t horrid of pri&#383;ons, &#383;he had, &#383;oon
+after her entrance, raved of inju&#383;tice,
+in accents that would have ju&#383;tified
+his treatment, had not a malignant
+&#383;mile, when &#383;he appealed to his judgment,
+with a dreadful conviction &#383;tifled
+her remon&#383;trating complaints. By
+force, or openly, what could be done?
+But &#383;urely &#383;ome expedient might occur
+to an active mind, without any other
+employment, and po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed of &#383;ufficient
+re&#383;olution to put the ri&#383;k of life into
+the balance with the chance of freedom.</p>
+
+<p>A woman entered in the mid&#383;t of
+the&#383;e reflections, with a firm, deliberate<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-8_S" id="APg_1-8_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-8.png">8</a>]</span>
+&#383;tep, &#383;trongly marked features, and
+large black eyes, which &#383;he fixed
+&#383;teadily on Maria's, as if &#383;he de&#383;igned
+to intimidate her, &#383;aying at the &#383;ame
+time&mdash;"You had better &#383;it down and
+eat your dinner, than look at the
+clouds."</p>
+
+<p>"I have no appetite," replied Maria,
+who had previou&#383;ly determined to
+&#383;peak mildly, "why then &#383;hould I
+eat?"</p>
+
+<p>"But, in &#383;pite of that, you mu&#383;t
+and &#383;hall eat &#383;omething. I have had
+many ladies under my care, who have
+re&#383;olved to &#383;tarve them&#383;elves; but, &#383;oon
+or late, they gave up their intent, as
+they recovered their &#383;en&#383;es."</p>
+
+<p>"Do you really think me mad?"
+a&#383;ked Maria, meeting the &#383;earching
+glance of her eye.</p>
+
+<p>"Not ju&#383;t now. But what does<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-9_S" id="APg_1-9_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-9.png">9</a>]</span>
+that prove?&mdash;only that you mu&#383;t be
+the more carefully watched, for appearing
+at times &#383;o rea&#383;onable. You
+have not touched a mor&#383;el &#383;ince you
+entered the hou&#383;e."&mdash;Maria &#383;ighed intelligibly.&mdash;"Could
+any thing but madne&#383;s
+produce &#383;uch a di&#383;gu&#383;t for food?"</p>
+
+<p>"Yes, grief; you would not a&#383;k
+the que&#383;tion if you knew what it
+was." The attendant &#383;hook her head;
+and a gha&#383;tly &#383;mile of de&#383;perate fortitude
+&#383;erved as a forcible reply, and
+made Maria pau&#383;e, before &#383;he added&mdash;"Yet
+I will take &#383;ome refre&#383;hment:
+I mean not to die.&mdash;No; I will pre&#383;erve
+my &#383;en&#383;es; and convince even
+you, &#383;ooner than you are aware of,
+that my intellects have never been di&#383;turbed,
+though the exertion of them
+may have been &#383;u&#383;pended by &#383;ome infernal
+drug."</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-10_S" id="APg_1-10_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+Doubt gathered &#383;till thicker on the
+brow of her guard, as &#383;he attempted
+to convict her of mi&#383;take.</p>
+
+<p>"Have patience!" exclaimed Maria,
+with a &#383;olemnity that in&#383;pired awe.
+"My God! how have I been &#383;chooled
+into the practice!" A &#383;uffocation of
+voice betrayed the agonizing emotions
+&#383;he was labouring to keep down; and
+conquering a qualm of di&#383;gu&#383;t, &#383;he
+calmly endeavoured to eat enough to
+prove her docility, perpetually turning
+to the &#383;u&#383;picious female, who&#383;e ob&#383;ervation
+&#383;he courted, while &#383;he was
+making the bed and adju&#383;ting the
+room.</p>
+
+<p>"Come to me often," &#383;aid Maria,
+with a tone of per&#383;ua&#383;ion, in con&#383;equence
+of a vague plan that &#383;he had
+ha&#383;tily adopted, when, after &#383;urveying
+this woman's form and features, &#383;he<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-11_S" id="APg_1-11_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-11.png">11</a>]</span>
+felt convinced that &#383;he had an under&#383;tanding
+above the common &#383;tandard;
+"and believe me mad, till you are
+obliged to acknowledge the contrary."
+The woman was no fool, that is, &#383;he
+was &#383;uperior to her cla&#383;s; nor had
+mi&#383;ery quite petrified the life's-blood
+of humanity, to which reflections on
+our own mi&#383;fortunes only give a more
+orderly cour&#383;e. The manner, rather
+than the expo&#383;tulations, of Maria
+made a &#383;light &#383;u&#383;picion dart into her
+mind with corre&#383;ponding &#383;ympathy,
+which various other avocations, and
+the habit of bani&#383;hing compunction,
+prevented her, for the pre&#383;ent, from
+examining more minutely.</p>
+
+<p>But when &#383;he was told that no per&#383;on,
+excepting the phy&#383;ician appointed by
+her family, was to be permitted to &#383;ee
+the lady at the end of the gallery, &#383;he<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-12_S" id="APg_1-12_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+opened her keen eyes &#383;till wider, and
+uttered a&mdash;"hem!" before &#383;he enquired&mdash;"Why?"
+She was briefly told, in
+reply, that the malady was hereditary,
+and the fits not occurring but at very
+long and irregular intervals, &#383;he mu&#383;t
+be carefully watched; for the length of
+the&#383;e lucid periods only rendered her
+more mi&#383;chievous, when any vexation
+or caprice brought on the paroxy&#383;m of
+phren&#383;y.</p>
+
+<p>Had her ma&#383;ter tru&#383;ted her, it is
+probable that neither pity nor curio&#383;ity
+would have made her &#383;werve from the
+&#383;traight line of her intere&#383;t; for &#383;he
+had &#383;uffered too much in her intercour&#383;e
+with mankind, not to determine
+to look for &#383;upport, rather to humouring
+their pa&#383;&#383;ions, than courting
+their approbation by the integrity of
+her conduct. A deadly blight had met<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-13_S" id="APg_1-13_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-13.png">13</a>]</span>
+her at the very thre&#383;hold of exi&#383;tence;
+and the wretchedne&#383;s of her mother
+&#383;eemed a heavy weight fa&#383;tened on her
+innocent neck, to drag her down to
+perdition. She could not heroically
+determine to &#383;uccour an unfortunate;
+but, offended at the bare &#383;uppo&#383;ition
+that &#383;he could be deceived with the
+&#383;ame ea&#383;e as a common &#383;ervant, &#383;he
+no longer curbed her curio&#383;ity; and,
+though &#383;he never &#383;eriou&#383;ly fathomed
+her own intentions, &#383;he would &#383;it, every
+moment &#383;he could &#383;teal from ob&#383;ervation,
+li&#383;tening to the tale, which Maria
+was eager to relate with all the per&#383;ua&#383;ive
+eloquence of grief.</p>
+
+<p>It is &#383;o cheering to &#383;ee a human
+face, even if little of the divinity of
+virtue beam in it, that Maria anxiou&#383;ly
+expected the return of the attendant,
+as of a gleam of light to break the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-14_S" id="APg_1-14_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-14.png">14</a>]</span>
+gloom of idlene&#383;s. Indulged &#383;orrow;
+&#383;he perceived, mu&#383;t blunt or &#383;harpen
+the faculties to the two oppo&#383;ite extremes;
+producing &#383;tupidity, the moping
+melancholy of indolence; or the
+re&#383;tle&#383;s activity of a di&#383;turbed imagination.
+She &#383;unk into one &#383;tate, after
+being fatigued by the other: till the
+want of occupation became even more
+painful than the actual pre&#383;&#383;ure or apprehen&#383;ion
+of &#383;orrow; and the confinement
+that froze her into a nook of
+exi&#383;tence, with an unvaried pro&#383;pect
+before her, the mo&#383;t in&#383;upportable of
+evils. The lamp of life &#383;eemed to be
+&#383;pending it&#383;elf to cha&#383;e the vapours of
+a dungeon which no art could di&#383;&#383;ipate.&mdash;And
+to what purpo&#383;e did &#383;he
+rally all her energy?&mdash;Was not the
+world a va&#383;t pri&#383;on, and women born
+&#383;laves?</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-15_S" id="APg_1-15_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-15.png">15</a>]</span>
+Though &#383;he failed immediately to
+rou&#383;e a lively &#383;en&#383;e of inju&#383;tice in the
+mind of her guard, becau&#383;e it had
+been &#383;ophi&#383;ticated into mi&#383;anthropy,
+&#383;he touched her heart. Jemima (&#383;he
+had only a claim to a Chri&#383;tian name,
+which had not procured her any Chri&#383;tian
+privileges) could patiently hear of
+Maria's confinement on fal&#383;e pretences;
+&#383;he had felt the cru&#383;hing hand of
+power, hardened by the exerci&#383;e of
+inju&#383;tice, and cea&#383;ed to wonder at the
+perver&#383;ions of the under&#383;tanding, which
+&#383;y&#383;tematize oppre&#383;&#383;ion; but, when told
+that her child, only four months old,
+had been torn from her, even while
+&#383;he was di&#383;charging the tendere&#383;t maternal
+office, the woman awoke in a
+bo&#383;om long e&#383;tranged from feminine
+emotions, and Jemima determined to
+alleviate all in her power, without ha<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-16_S" id="APg_1-16_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-16.png">16</a>]</span>zarding
+the lo&#383;s of her place, the &#383;ufferings
+of a wretched mother, apparently
+injured, and certainly unhappy.
+A &#383;en&#383;e of right &#383;eems to re&#383;ult from
+the &#383;imple&#383;t act of rea&#383;on, and to pre&#383;ide
+over the faculties of the mind,
+like the ma&#383;ter-&#383;en&#383;e of feeling, to
+rectify the re&#383;t; but (for the compari&#383;on
+may be carried &#383;till farther) how
+often is the exqui&#383;ite &#383;en&#383;ibility of
+both weakened or de&#383;troyed by the
+vulgar occupations, and ignoble plea&#383;ures
+of life?</p>
+
+<p>The pre&#383;erving her &#383;ituation was,
+indeed, an important object to Jemima,
+who had been hunted from hole
+to hole, as if &#383;he had been a bea&#383;t of
+prey, or infected with a moral plague.
+The wages &#383;he received, the greater
+part of which &#383;he hoarded, as her only
+chance for independence, were much<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-17_S" id="APg_1-17_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-17.png">17</a>]</span>
+more con&#383;iderable than &#383;he could reckon
+on obtaining any where el&#383;e, were
+it po&#383;&#383;ible that &#383;he, an outca&#383;t from
+&#383;ociety, could be permitted to earn a
+&#383;ub&#383;i&#383;tence in a reputable family. Hearing
+Maria perpetually complain of li&#383;tle&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s,
+and the not being able to beguile
+grief by re&#383;uming her cu&#383;tomary
+pur&#383;uits, &#383;he was ea&#383;ily prevailed on,
+by compa&#383;&#383;ion, and that involuntary
+re&#383;pect for abilities, which tho&#383;e who
+po&#383;&#383;e&#383;s them can never eradicate, to
+bring her &#383;ome books and implements
+for writing. Maria's conver&#383;ation had
+amu&#383;ed and intere&#383;ted her, and the natural
+con&#383;equence was a de&#383;ire, &#383;carcely
+ob&#383;erved by her&#383;elf, of obtaining the
+e&#383;teem of a per&#383;on &#383;he admired. The
+remembrance of better days was rendered
+more lively; and the &#383;entiments
+then acquired appearing le&#383;s romantic<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-18_S" id="APg_1-18_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-18.png">18</a>]</span>
+than they had for a long period, a
+&#383;park of hope rou&#383;ed her mind to new
+activity.</p>
+
+<p>How grateful was her attention to
+Maria! Oppre&#383;&#383;ed by a dead weight
+of exi&#383;tence, or preyed on by the
+gnawing worm of di&#383;content, with
+what eagerne&#383;s did &#383;he endeavour to
+&#383;horten the long days, which left no
+traces behind! She &#383;eemed to be
+&#383;ailing on the va&#383;t ocean of life, without
+&#383;eeing any land-mark to indicate
+the progre&#383;s of time; to find employment
+was then to find variety, the
+animating principle of nature.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-19_S" id="APg_1-19_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-19.png">19</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_II_S" id="ACHAP_II_S"></a>CHAP. II.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Earne&#383;tly</span> as Maria endeavoured
+to &#383;oothe, by reading, the angui&#383;h
+of her wounded mind, her thoughts
+would often wander from the &#383;ubject
+&#383;he was led to di&#383;cu&#383;s, and tears of
+maternal tenderne&#383;s ob&#383;cured the rea&#383;oning
+page. She de&#383;canted on "the
+ills which fle&#383;h is heir to," with bitterne&#383;s,
+when the recollection of her
+babe was revived by a tale of fictitious
+woe, that bore any re&#383;emblance to her
+own; and her imagination was continually
+employed, to conjure up and
+embody the various phantoms of mi&#383;ery,
+which folly and vice had let loo&#383;e
+on the world. The lo&#383;s of her babe
+was the tender &#383;tring; again&#383;t other
+cruel remembrances &#383;he laboured to<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-20_S" id="APg_1-20_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-20.png">20</a>]</span>
+&#383;teel her bo&#383;om; and even a ray of
+hope, in the mid&#383;t of her gloomy reveries,
+would &#383;ometimes gleam on the
+dark horizon of futurity, while per&#383;uading
+her&#383;elf that &#383;he ought to cea&#383;e
+to hope, &#383;ince happine&#383;s was no where
+to be found.&mdash;But of her child, debilitated
+by the grief with which its
+mother had been a&#383;&#383;ailed before it &#383;aw
+the light, &#383;he could not think without
+an impatient &#383;truggle.</p>
+
+<p>"I, alone, by my active tenderne&#383;s,
+could have &#383;aved," &#383;he would exclaim,
+"from an early blight, this &#383;weet
+blo&#383;&#383;om; and, cheri&#383;hing it, I &#383;hould
+have had &#383;omething &#383;till to love."</p>
+
+<p>In proportion as other expectations
+were torn from her, this tender one
+had been fondly clung to, and knit
+into her heart.</p>
+
+<p>The books &#383;he had obtained, were<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-21_S" id="APg_1-21_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-21.png">21</a>]</span>
+&#383;oon devoured, by one who had no
+other re&#383;ource to e&#383;cape from &#383;orrow,
+and the feveri&#383;h dreams of ideal wretchedne&#383;s
+or felicity, which equally weaken
+the intoxicated &#383;en&#383;ibility. Writing
+was then the only alternative, and
+&#383;he wrote &#383;ome rhap&#383;odies de&#383;criptive
+of the &#383;tate of her mind; but the
+events of her pa&#383;t life pre&#383;&#383;ing on her,
+&#383;he re&#383;olved circum&#383;tantially to relate
+them, with the &#383;entiments that experience,
+and more matured rea&#383;on,
+would naturally &#383;ugge&#383;t. They might
+perhaps in&#383;truct her daughter, and
+&#383;hield her from the mi&#383;ery, the tyranny,
+her mother knew not how to avoid.</p>
+
+<p>This thought gave life to her diction,
+her &#383;oul flowed into it, and &#383;he &#383;oon
+found the ta&#383;k of recollecting almo&#383;t
+obliterated impre&#383;&#383;ions very intere&#383;ting.
+She lived again in the revived emo<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-22_S" id="APg_1-22_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-22.png">22</a>]</span>tions
+of youth, and forgot her pre&#383;ent
+in the retro&#383;pect of &#383;orrows that had
+a&#383;&#383;umed an unalterable character.</p>
+
+<p>Though this employment lightened
+the weight of time, yet, never lo&#383;ing
+&#383;ight of her main object, Maria did
+not allow any opportunity to &#383;lip of
+winning on the affections of Jemima;
+for &#383;he di&#383;covered in her a &#383;trength of
+mind, that excited her e&#383;teem, clouded
+as it was by the mi&#383;anthropy of de&#383;pair.</p>
+
+<p>An in&#383;ulated being, from the mi&#383;fortune
+of her birth, &#383;he de&#383;pi&#383;ed and
+preyed on the &#383;ociety by which &#383;he
+had been oppre&#383;&#383;ed, and loved not her
+fellow-creatures, becau&#383;e &#383;he had never
+been beloved. No mother had ever
+fondled her, no father or brother had
+protected her from outrage; and the
+man who had plunged her into in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-23_S" id="APg_1-23_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-23.png">23</a>]</span>famy,
+and de&#383;erted her when &#383;he &#383;tood
+in greate&#383;t need of &#383;upport, deigned
+not to &#383;mooth with kindne&#383;s the road
+to ruin. Thus degraded, was &#383;he let
+loo&#383;e on the world; and virtue, never
+nurtured by affection, a&#383;&#383;umed the &#383;tern
+a&#383;pect of &#383;elfi&#383;h independence.</p>
+
+<p>This general view of her life, Maria
+gathered from her exclamations and
+dry remarks. Jemima indeed di&#383;played
+a &#383;trange mixture of intere&#383;t
+and &#383;u&#383;picion; for &#383;he would li&#383;ten to
+her with earne&#383;tne&#383;s, and then &#383;uddenly
+interrupt the conver&#383;ation, as if
+afraid of re&#383;igning, by giving way to
+her &#383;ympathy, her dear-bought knowledge
+of the world.</p>
+
+<p>Maria alluded to the po&#383;&#383;ibility of
+an e&#383;cape, and mentioned a compen&#383;ation,
+or reward; but the &#383;tyle in which
+&#383;he was repul&#383;ed made her cautious,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-24_S" id="APg_1-24_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-24.png">24</a>]</span>
+and determine not to renew the &#383;ubject,
+till &#383;he knew more of the character
+&#383;he had to work on. Jemima's
+countenance, and dark hints, &#383;eemed
+to &#383;ay, "You are an extraordinary
+woman; but let me con&#383;ider, this may
+only be one of your lucid intervals."
+Nay, the very energy of Maria's character,
+made her &#383;u&#383;pect that the extraordinary
+animation &#383;he perceived
+might be the effect of madne&#383;s. "Should
+her hu&#383;band then &#383;ub&#383;tantiate his
+charge, and get po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of her e&#383;tate,
+from whence would come the promi&#383;ed
+annuity, or more de&#383;ired protection?
+Be&#383;ides, might not a woman, anxious
+to e&#383;cape, conceal &#383;ome of the circum&#383;tances
+which made again&#383;t her? Was
+truth to be expected from one who
+had been entrapped, kidnapped, in
+the mo&#383;t fraudulent manner?"</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-25_S" id="APg_1-25_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-25.png">25</a>]</span>
+In this train Jemima continued to
+argue, the moment after compa&#383;&#383;ion
+and re&#383;pect &#383;eemed to make her &#383;werve;
+and &#383;he &#383;till re&#383;olved not to be wrought
+on to do more than &#383;often the rigour
+of confinement, till &#383;he could advance
+on &#383;urer ground.</p>
+
+<p>Maria was not permitted to walk in
+the garden; but &#383;ometimes, from her
+window, &#383;he turned her eyes from the
+gloomy walls, in which &#383;he pined life
+away, on the poor wretches who &#383;trayed
+along the walks, and contemplated
+the mo&#383;t terrific of ruins&mdash;that of a
+human &#383;oul. What is the view of the
+fallen column, the mouldering arch, of
+the mo&#383;t exqui&#383;ite workman&#383;hip, when
+compared with this living memento of
+the fragility, the in&#383;tability, of rea&#383;on,
+and the wild luxuriancy of noxious
+pa&#383;&#383;ions? Enthu&#383;ia&#383;m turned adrift,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-26_S" id="APg_1-26_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-26.png">26</a>]</span>
+like &#383;ome rich &#383;tream overflowing its
+banks, ru&#383;hes forward with de&#383;tructive
+velocity, in&#383;piring a &#383;ublime concentration
+of thought. Thus thought
+Maria&mdash;The&#383;e are the ravages over
+which humanity mu&#383;t ever mournfully
+ponder, with a degree of angui&#383;h not
+excited by crumbling marble, or cankering
+bra&#383;s, unfaithful to the tru&#383;t of
+monumental fame. It is not over the
+decaying productions of the mind, embodied
+with the happie&#383;t art, we grieve
+mo&#383;t bitterly. The view of what has
+been done by man, produces a melancholy,
+yet aggrandizing, &#383;en&#383;e of what
+remains to be achieved by human intellect;
+but a mental convul&#383;ion, which,
+like the deva&#383;tation of an earthquake,
+throws all the elements of thought and
+imagination into confu&#383;ion, makes con<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-27_S" id="APg_1-27_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-27.png">27</a>]</span>templation
+giddy, and we fearfully a&#383;k
+on what ground we our&#383;elves &#383;tand.</p>
+
+<p>Melancholy and imbecility marked
+the features of the wretches allowed to
+breathe at large; for the frantic, tho&#383;e
+who in a &#383;trong imagination had lo&#383;t a
+&#383;en&#383;e of woe, were clo&#383;ely confined.
+The playful tricks and mi&#383;chievous devices
+of their di&#383;turbed fancy, that &#383;uddenly
+broke out, could not be guarded
+again&#383;t, when they were permitted to
+enjoy any portion of freedom; for,
+&#383;o active was their imagination, that
+every new object which accidentally
+&#383;truck their &#383;en&#383;es, awoke to phrenzy
+their re&#383;tle&#383;s pa&#383;&#383;ions; as Maria learned
+from the burden of their ince&#383;&#383;ant
+ravings.</p>
+
+<p>Sometimes, with a &#383;trict injunction
+of &#383;ilence, Jemima would allow Maria,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-28_S" id="APg_1-28_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-28.png">28</a>]</span>
+at the clo&#383;e of evening, to &#383;tray along
+the narrow avenues that &#383;eparated the
+dungeon-like apartments, leaning on
+her arm. What a change of &#383;cene!
+Maria wi&#383;hed to pa&#383;s the thre&#383;hold of
+her pri&#383;on, yet, when by chance &#383;he
+met the eye of rage glaring on her, yet
+unfaithful to its office, &#383;he &#383;hrunk back
+with more horror and affright, than if
+&#383;he had &#383;tumbled over a mangled corp&#383;e.
+Her bu&#383;y fancy pictured the mi&#383;ery of a
+fond heart, watching over a friend thus
+e&#383;tranged, ab&#383;ent, though pre&#383;ent&mdash;over
+a poor wretch lo&#383;t to rea&#383;on and the
+&#383;ocial joys of exi&#383;tence; and lo&#383;ing all
+con&#383;ciou&#383;ne&#383;s of mi&#383;ery in its exce&#383;s.
+What a ta&#383;k, to watch the light of rea&#383;on
+quivering in the eye, or with agonizing
+expectation to catch the beam of recollection;
+tantalized by hope, only to
+feel de&#383;pair more keenly, at finding a<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-29_S" id="APg_1-29_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+much loved face or voice, &#383;uddenly remembered,
+or pathetically implored,
+only to be immediately forgotten, or
+viewed with indifference or abhorrence!</p>
+
+<p>The heart-rending &#383;igh of melancholy
+&#383;unk into her &#383;oul; and when &#383;he retired
+to re&#383;t, the petrified figures &#383;he
+had encountered, the only human forms
+&#383;he was doomed to ob&#383;erve, haunting
+her dreams with tales of my&#383;terious
+wrongs, made her wi&#383;h to &#383;leep to dream
+no more.</p>
+
+<p>Day after day rolled away, and tedious
+as the pre&#383;ent moment appeared,
+they pa&#383;&#383;ed in &#383;uch an unvaried tenor,
+Maria was &#383;urpri&#383;ed to find that &#383;he
+had already been &#383;ix weeks buried alive,
+and yet had &#383;uch faint hopes of effecting
+her enlargement. She was, earne&#383;tly
+as &#383;he had &#383;ought for employment,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-30_S" id="APg_1-30_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+now angry with her&#383;elf for having been
+amu&#383;ed by writing her narrative; and
+grieved to think that &#383;he had for an in&#383;tant
+thought of any thing, but contriving
+to e&#383;cape.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima had evidently plea&#383;ure in
+her &#383;ociety: &#383;till, though &#383;he often left
+her with a glow of kindne&#383;s, &#383;he returned
+with the &#383;ame chilling air; and,
+when her heart appeared for a moment
+to open, &#383;ome &#383;ugge&#383;tion of rea&#383;on forcibly
+clo&#383;ed it, before &#383;he could give
+utterance to the confidence Maria's
+conver&#383;ation in&#383;pired.</p>
+
+<p>Di&#383;couraged by the&#383;e changes, Maria
+relap&#383;ed into de&#383;pondency, when &#383;he
+was cheered by the alacrity with which
+Jemima brought her a fre&#383;h parcel of
+books; a&#383;&#383;uring her, that &#383;he had taken
+&#383;ome pains to obtain them from one of
+the keepers, who attended a gentle<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-31_S" id="APg_1-31_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-31.png">31</a>]</span>man
+confined in the oppo&#383;ite corner of
+the gallery.</p>
+
+<p>Maria took up the books with emotion.
+"They come," &#383;aid &#383;he, "perhaps,
+from a wretch condemned, like
+me, to rea&#383;on on the nature of madne&#383;s,
+by having wrecked minds continually
+under his eye; and almo&#383;t to wi&#383;h him&#383;elf&mdash;as
+I do&mdash;mad, to e&#383;cape from the
+contemplation of it." Her heart throbbed
+with &#383;ympathetic alarm; and &#383;he
+turned over the leaves with awe, as if
+they had become &#383;acred from pa&#383;&#383;ing
+through the hands of an unfortunate
+being, oppre&#383;&#383;ed by a &#383;imilar fate.</p>
+
+<p>Dryden's Fables, Milton's Paradi&#383;e
+Lo&#383;t, with &#383;everal modern productions,
+compo&#383;ed the collection. It was a
+mine of trea&#383;ure. Some marginal notes,
+in Dryden's Fables, caught her attention:
+they were written with force<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-32_S" id="APg_1-32_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-32.png">32</a>]</span>
+and ta&#383;te; and, in one of the modern
+pamphlets, there was a fragment left,
+containing various ob&#383;ervations on the
+pre&#383;ent &#383;tate of &#383;ociety and government,
+with a comparative view of the
+politics of Europe and America. The&#383;e
+remarks were written with a degree of
+generous warmth, when alluding to the
+en&#383;laved &#383;tate of the labouring majority,
+perfectly in uni&#383;on with Maria's mode
+of thinking.</p>
+
+<p>She read them over and over again;
+and fancy, treacherous fancy, began to
+&#383;ketch a character, congenial with her
+own, from the&#383;e &#383;hadowy outlines.&mdash;"Was
+he mad?" She re-peru&#383;ed the
+marginal notes, and they &#383;eemed the
+production of an animated, but not of a
+di&#383;turbed imagination. Confined to
+this &#383;peculation, every time &#383;he re-read
+them, &#383;ome fre&#383;h refinement of<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-33_S" id="APg_1-33_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+&#383;entiment, or <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'accutene&#383;s'">acutene&#383;s</ins> of thought
+impre&#383;&#383;ed her, which &#383;he was a&#383;toni&#383;hed
+at her&#383;elf for not having before ob&#383;erved.</p>
+
+<p>What a creative power has an affectionate
+heart! There are beings who
+cannot live without loving, as poets
+love; and who feel the electric &#383;park
+of genius, wherever it awakens &#383;entiment
+or grace. Maria had often thought,
+when di&#383;ciplining her wayward heart,
+"that to charm, was to be virtuous."
+"They who make me wi&#383;h to appear
+the mo&#383;t amiable and good in their eyes,
+mu&#383;t po&#383;&#383;e&#383;s in a degree," &#383;he would
+exclaim, "the graces and virtues they
+call into action."</p>
+
+<p>She took up a book on the powers of
+the human mind; but, her attention
+&#383;trayed from cold arguments on the
+nature of what &#383;he felt, while &#383;he was<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-34_S" id="APg_1-34_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-34.png">34</a>]</span>
+feeling, and &#383;he &#383;napt the chain of the
+theory to read Dryden's Gui&#383;card and
+Sigi&#383;munda.</p>
+
+<p>Maria, in the cour&#383;e of the en&#383;uing
+day, returned &#383;ome of the books, with
+the hope of getting others&mdash;and more
+marginal notes. Thus &#383;hut out from
+human intercour&#383;e, and compelled to
+view nothing but the pri&#383;on of vexed
+&#383;pirits, to meet a wretch in the &#383;ame
+&#383;ituation, was more &#383;urely to find a
+friend, than to imagine a countryman
+one, in a &#383;trange land, where the human
+voice conveys no information to
+the eager ear.</p>
+
+<p>"Did you ever &#383;ee the unfortunate
+being to whom the&#383;e books belong?"
+a&#383;ked Maria, when Jemima brought
+her &#383;upper. "Yes. He &#383;ometimes
+walks out, between five and &#383;ix, before
+the family is &#383;tirring, in the morning,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-35_S" id="APg_1-35_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+with two keepers; but even then his
+hands are confined."</p>
+
+<p>"What! is he &#383;o unruly?" enquired
+Maria, with an accent of di&#383;appointment.</p>
+
+<p>"No, not that I perceive," replied
+Jemima; "but he has an untamed
+look, a vehemence of eye, that excites
+apprehen&#383;ion. Were his hands free,
+he looks as if he could &#383;oon manage
+both his guards: yet he appears
+tranquil."</p>
+
+<p>"If he be &#383;o &#383;trong, he mu&#383;t be
+young," ob&#383;erved Maria.</p>
+
+<p>"Three or four and thirty, I &#383;uppo&#383;e;
+but there is no judging of a
+per&#383;on in his &#383;ituation."</p>
+
+<p>"Are you &#383;ure that he is mad?"
+interrupted Maria with eagerne&#383;s. Jemima
+quitted the room, without replying.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-36_S" id="APg_1-36_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-36.png">36</a>]</span>
+"No, no, he certainly is not!" exclaimed
+Maria, an&#383;wering her&#383;elf;
+"the man who could write tho&#383;e ob&#383;ervations
+was not di&#383;ordered in his
+intellects."</p>
+
+<p>She &#383;at mu&#383;ing, gazing at the moon,
+and watching its motion as it &#383;eemed
+to glide under the clouds. Then, preparing
+for bed, &#383;he thought, "Of
+what u&#383;e could I be to him, or he to
+me, if it be true that he is unju&#383;tly
+confined?&mdash;Could he aid me to e&#383;cape,
+who is him&#383;elf more clo&#383;ely watched?&mdash;Still
+I &#383;hould like to &#383;ee him." She
+went to bed, dreamed of her child,
+yet woke exactly at half after five
+o'clock, and &#383;tarting up, only wrapped
+a gown around her, and ran to the
+window. The morning was chill, it
+was the latter end of September; yet
+&#383;he did not retire to warm her&#383;elf and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-37_S" id="APg_1-37_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-37.png">37</a>]</span>
+think in bed, till the &#383;ound of the
+&#383;ervants, moving about the hou&#383;e, convinced
+her that the unknown would
+not walk in the garden that morning.
+She was a&#383;hamed at feeling di&#383;appointed;
+and began to reflect, as an excu&#383;e
+to her&#383;elf, on the little objects which
+attract attention when there is nothing
+to divert the mind; and how difficult
+it was for women to avoid growing
+romantic, who have no active duties
+or pur&#383;uits.</p>
+
+<p>At breakfa&#383;t, Jemima enquired whether
+&#383;he under&#383;tood French? for, unle&#383;s
+&#383;he did, the &#383;tranger's &#383;tock of
+books was exhau&#383;ted. Maria replied
+in the affirmative; but forbore to a&#383;k
+any more que&#383;tions re&#383;pecting the per&#383;on
+to whom they belonged. And Jemima
+gave her a new &#383;ubject for contemplation,
+by de&#383;cribing the per&#383;on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-38_S" id="APg_1-38_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-38.png">38</a>]</span>
+of a lovely maniac, ju&#383;t brought into
+an adjoining chamber. She was &#383;inging
+the pathetic ballad of old Rob &ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;
+with the mo&#383;t heart-melting
+falls and pau&#383;es. Jemima had half-opened
+the door, when &#383;he di&#383;tingui&#383;hed
+her voice, and Maria &#383;tood clo&#383;e to it,
+&#383;carcely daring to re&#383;pire, le&#383;t a modulation
+&#383;hould e&#383;cape her, &#383;o exqui&#383;itely
+&#383;weet, &#383;o pa&#383;&#383;ionately wild. She
+began with &#383;ympathy to pourtray to
+her&#383;elf another victim, when the lovely
+warbler flew, as it were, from the
+&#383;pray, and a torrent of unconnected
+exclamations and que&#383;tions bur&#383;t from
+her, interrupted by fits of laughter, &#383;o
+horrid, that Maria &#383;hut the door, and,
+turning her eyes up to heaven, exclaimed&mdash;"Gracious
+God!"</p>
+
+<p>Several minutes elap&#383;ed before Maria
+could enquire re&#383;pecting the ru<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-39_S" id="APg_1-39_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-39.png">39</a>]</span>mour
+of the hou&#383;e (for this poor
+wretch was obviou&#383;ly not confined
+without a cau&#383;e); and then Jemima
+could only tell her, that it was &#383;aid,
+"&#383;he had been married, again&#383;t her
+inclination, to a rich old man, extremely
+jealous (no wonder, for &#383;he
+was a charming creature); and that,
+in con&#383;equence of his treatment, or
+&#383;omething which hung on her mind,
+&#383;he had, during her fir&#383;t lying-in, lo&#383;t
+her &#383;en&#383;es."</p>
+
+<p>What a &#383;ubject of meditation&mdash;even
+to the very confines of madne&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>"Woman, fragile flower! why
+were you &#383;uffered to adorn a world
+expo&#383;ed to the inroad of &#383;uch &#383;tormy
+elements?" thought Maria, while the
+poor maniac's &#383;train was &#383;till breathing
+on her ear, and &#383;inking into her very
+&#383;oul.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-40_S" id="APg_1-40_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+Towards the evening, Jemima brought
+her Rou&#383;&#383;eau's <i>Helo&iuml;&#383;e</i>; and &#383;he &#383;at
+reading with eyes and heart, till the
+return of her guard to extingui&#383;h the
+light. One in&#383;tance of her kindne&#383;s
+was, the permitting Maria to have
+one, till her own hour of retiring to
+re&#383;t. She had read this work long
+&#383;ince; but now it &#383;eemed to open a
+new world to her&mdash;the only one worth
+inhabiting. Sleep was not to be
+wooed; yet, far from being fatigued
+by the re&#383;tle&#383;s rotation of thought, &#383;he
+ro&#383;e and opened her window, ju&#383;t as
+the thin watery clouds of twilight
+made the long &#383;ilent &#383;hadows vi&#383;ible.
+The air &#383;wept acro&#383;s her face with a
+voluptuous fre&#383;hne&#383;s that thrilled to
+her heart, awakening indefinable emotions;
+and the &#383;ound of a waving
+branch, or the twittering of a &#383;tartled<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-41_S" id="APg_1-41_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+bird, alone broke the &#383;tillne&#383;s of repo&#383;ing
+nature. Ab&#383;orbed by the &#383;ublime
+&#383;en&#383;ibility which renders the con&#383;ciou&#383;ne&#383;s
+of exi&#383;tence felicity, Maria
+was happy, till an autumnal &#383;cent,
+wafted by the breeze of morn from
+the fallen leaves of the adjacent wood,
+made her recollect that the &#383;ea&#383;on had
+changed &#383;ince her confinement; yet
+life afforded no variety to &#383;olace an
+afflicted heart. She returned di&#383;pirited
+to her couch, and thought of her child
+till the broad glare of day again invited
+her to the window. She looked
+not for the unknown, &#383;till how great
+was her vexation at perceiving the
+back of a man, certainly he, with his
+two attendants, as he turned into a
+&#383;ide-path which led to the hou&#383;e! A
+confu&#383;ed recollection of having &#383;een
+&#383;omebody who re&#383;embled him, imme<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-42_S" id="APg_1-42_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-42.png">42</a>]</span>diately
+occurred, to puzzle and torment
+her with endle&#383;s conjectures. Five
+minutes &#383;ooner, and &#383;he &#383;hould have
+&#383;een his face, and been out of &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e&mdash;was
+ever any thing &#383;o unlucky!
+His &#383;teady, bold &#383;tep, and the whole
+air of his per&#383;on, bur&#383;ting as it were
+from a cloud, plea&#383;ed her, and gave
+an outline to the imagination to &#383;ketch
+the individual form &#383;he wi&#383;hed to recognize.</p>
+
+<p>Feeling the di&#383;appointment more
+&#383;everely than &#383;he was willing to believe,
+&#383;he flew to Rou&#383;&#383;eau, as her
+only refuge from the idea of him, who
+might prove a friend, could &#383;he but
+find a way to intere&#383;t him in her fate;
+&#383;till the per&#383;onification of Saint Preux,
+or of an ideal lover far &#383;uperior, was
+after this imperfect model, of which
+merely a glance had been caught,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-43_S" id="APg_1-43_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-43.png">43</a>]</span>
+even to the minuti&aelig; of the coat and
+hat of the &#383;tranger. But if &#383;he lent
+St. Preux, or the demi-god of her
+fancy, his form, &#383;he richly repaid him
+by the donation of all St. Preux's
+&#383;entiments and feelings, culled to gratify
+her own, to which he &#383;eemed to
+have an undoubted right, when &#383;he
+read on the margin of an impa&#383;&#383;ioned
+letter, written in the well-known hand&mdash;"Rou&#383;&#383;eau
+alone, the true Prometheus
+of &#383;entiment, po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed the fire
+of genius nece&#383;&#383;ary to pourtray the
+pa&#383;&#383;ion, the truth of which goes &#383;o
+directly to the heart."</p>
+
+<p>Maria was again true to the hour, yet
+had fini&#383;hed Rou&#383;&#383;eau, and begun to
+tran&#383;cribe &#383;ome &#383;elected pa&#383;&#383;ages; unable
+to quit either the author or the window,
+before &#383;he had a glimp&#383;e of the
+countenance &#383;he daily longed to &#383;ee;<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-44_S" id="APg_1-44_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-44.png">44</a>]</span>
+and, when &#383;een, it conveyed no di&#383;tinct
+idea to her mind where &#383;he had
+&#383;een it before. He mu&#383;t have been a
+tran&#383;ient acquaintance; but to di&#383;cover
+an acquaintance was fortunate, could
+&#383;he contrive to attract his attention,
+and excite his &#383;ympathy.</p>
+
+<p>Every glance afforded colouring for
+the picture &#383;he was delineating on her
+heart; and once, when the window
+was half open, the &#383;ound of his voice
+reached her. Conviction fla&#383;hed on
+her; &#383;he had certainly, in a moment
+of di&#383;tre&#383;s, heard the &#383;ame accents.
+They were manly, and characteri&#383;tic
+of a noble mind; nay, even &#383;weet&mdash;or
+&#383;weet they &#383;eemed to her attentive
+ear.</p>
+
+<p>She &#383;tarted back, trembling, alarmed
+at the emotion a &#383;trange coincidence
+of circum&#383;tances in&#383;pired, and wonder<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-45_S" id="APg_1-45_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-45.png">45</a>]</span>ing
+why &#383;he thought &#383;o much of a
+&#383;tranger, obliged as &#383;he had been by
+his timely interference; [for &#383;he recollected,
+by degrees, all the circum&#383;tances
+of their former meeting.] She
+found however that &#383;he could think
+of nothing el&#383;e; or, if &#383;he thought of
+her daughter, it was to wi&#383;h that &#383;he
+had a father whom her mother could
+re&#383;pect and love.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-46_S" id="APg_1-46_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-46.png">46</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_III_S" id="ACHAP_III_S"></a>CHAP. III.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> peru&#383;ing the fir&#383;t parcel of
+books, Maria had, with her pencil, written
+in one of them a few exclamations,
+expre&#383;&#383;ive of compa&#383;&#383;ion and &#383;ympathy,
+which &#383;he &#383;carcely remembered, till
+turning over the leaves of one of the
+volumes, lately brought to her, a &#383;lip
+of paper dropped out, which Jemima
+ha&#383;tily &#383;natched up.</p>
+
+<p>"Let me &#383;ee it," demanded Maria
+impatiently, "You &#383;urely are not
+afraid of tru&#383;ting me with the effu&#383;ions
+of a madman?" "I mu&#383;t con&#383;ider," replied
+Jemima; and withdrew, with
+the paper in her hand.</p>
+
+<p>In a life of &#383;uch &#383;eclu&#383;ion, the pa&#383;&#383;ions
+gain undue force; Maria therefore
+felt a great degree of re&#383;entment and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-47_S" id="APg_1-47_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-47.png">47</a>]</span>
+vexation, which &#383;he had not time to
+&#383;ubdue, before Jemima, returning, delivered
+the paper.</p>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p>"Whoever you are, who partake of
+my fate, accept my &#383;incere commi&#383;eration&mdash;I
+would have &#383;aid protection;
+but the privilege of man is denied me.</p>
+
+<p>"My own &#383;ituation forces a dreadful
+&#383;u&#383;picion on my mind&mdash;I may not always
+langui&#383;h in vain for freedom&mdash;&#383;ay
+are you&mdash;I cannot a&#383;k the que&#383;tion;
+yet I will remember you when my remembrance
+can be of any u&#383;e. I will
+enquire, <i>why</i> you are &#383;o my&#383;teriou&#383;ly
+detained&mdash;and I <i>will</i> have an an&#383;wer.</p>
+
+<p class="right">"<span class="smcap">henry darnford</span>."</p></div>
+
+<p>By the mo&#383;t pre&#383;&#383;ing intreaties, Maria
+prevailed on Jemima to permit her to
+write a reply to this note. Another<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-48_S" id="APg_1-48_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+and another &#383;ucceeded, in which explanations
+were not allowed relative to
+their pre&#383;ent &#383;ituation; but Maria, with
+&#383;ufficient explicitne&#383;s, alluded to a former
+obligation; and they in&#383;en&#383;ibly entered
+on an interchange of &#383;entiments
+on the mo&#383;t important &#383;ubjects. To
+write the&#383;e letters was the bu&#383;ine&#383;s of
+the day, and to receive them the moment
+of &#383;un&#383;hine. By &#383;ome means,
+Darnford having di&#383;covered Maria's
+window, when &#383;he next appeared at
+it, he made her, behind his keepers, a
+profound bow of re&#383;pect and recognition.</p>
+
+<p>Two or three weeks glided away in
+this kind of intercour&#383;e, during which
+period Jemima, to whom Maria had
+given the nece&#383;&#383;ary information re&#383;pecting
+her family, had evidently gained
+&#383;ome intelligence, which increa&#383;ed her<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-49_S" id="APg_1-49_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+de&#383;ire of plea&#383;ing her charge, though
+&#383;he could not yet determine to liberate
+her. Maria took advantage of this
+favourable charge, without too minutely
+enquiring into the cau&#383;e; and &#383;uch
+was her eagerne&#383;s to hold human conver&#383;e,
+and to &#383;ee her former protector,
+&#383;till a &#383;tranger to her, that &#383;he ince&#383;&#383;antly
+reque&#383;ted her guard to gratify her more
+than curio&#383;ity.</p>
+
+<p>Writing to Darnford, &#383;he was led
+from the &#383;ad objects before her, and
+frequently rendered in&#383;en&#383;ible to the
+horrid noi&#383;es around her, which previou&#383;ly
+had continually employed her
+feveri&#383;h fancy. Thinking it &#383;elfi&#383;h to
+dwell on her own &#383;ufferings, when in
+the mid&#383;t of wretches, who had not
+only lo&#383;t all that endears life, but their
+very &#383;elves, her imagination was oc<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-50_S" id="APg_1-50_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-50.png">50</a>]</span>cupied
+with melancholy earne&#383;tne&#383;s to
+trace the mazes of mi&#383;ery, through
+which &#383;o many wretches mu&#383;t have
+pa&#383;&#383;ed to this gloomy receptacle of di&#383;jointed
+&#383;ouls, to the grand &#383;ource of
+human corruption. Often at midnight
+was &#383;he waked by the di&#383;mal &#383;hrieks of
+demoniac rage, or of excruciating de&#383;pair,
+uttered in &#383;uch wild tones of inde&#383;cribable
+angui&#383;h as proved the total
+ab&#383;ence of rea&#383;on, and rou&#383;ed phantoms
+of horror in her mind, far more
+terrific than all that dreaming &#383;uper&#383;tition
+ever drew. Be&#383;ides, there was
+frequently &#383;omething &#383;o inconceivably
+picture&#383;que in the varying ge&#383;tures of
+unre&#383;trained pa&#383;&#383;ion, &#383;o irre&#383;i&#383;tibly comic
+in their &#383;allies, or &#383;o heart-piercingly
+pathetic in the little airs they would
+&#383;ing, frequently bur&#383;ting out after an
+awful &#383;ilence, as to fa&#383;cinate the at<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-51_S" id="APg_1-51_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-51.png">51</a>]</span>tention,
+and amu&#383;e the fancy, while
+torturing the &#383;oul. It was the uproar
+of the pa&#383;&#383;ions which &#383;he was compelled
+to ob&#383;erve; and to mark the
+lucid beam of rea&#383;on, like a light
+trembling in a &#383;ocket, or like the
+fla&#383;h which divides the threatening
+clouds of angry heaven only to di&#383;play
+the horrors which darkne&#383;s &#383;hrouded.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima would labour to beguile the
+tedious evenings, by de&#383;cribing the
+per&#383;ons and manners of the <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'unfortutunate'">unfortunate</ins>
+beings, who&#383;e figures or voices
+awoke &#383;ympathetic &#383;orrow in Maria's
+bo&#383;om; and the &#383;tories &#383;he told were
+the more intere&#383;ting, for perpetually
+leaving room to conjecture &#383;omething
+extraordinary. Still Maria, accu&#383;tomed
+to generalize her ob&#383;ervations, was
+led to conclude from all &#383;he heard,
+that it was a vulgar error to &#383;uppo&#383;e<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-52_S" id="APg_1-52_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-52.png">52</a>]</span>
+that people of abilities were the mo&#383;t
+apt to lo&#383;e the command of rea&#383;on.
+On the contrary, from mo&#383;t of the in&#383;tances
+&#383;he could inve&#383;tigate, &#383;he thought
+it re&#383;ulted, that the pa&#383;&#383;ions only appeared
+&#383;trong and di&#383;proportioned, becau&#383;e
+the judgment was weak and unexerci&#383;ed;
+and that they gained &#383;trength
+by the decay of rea&#383;on, as the &#383;hadows
+lengthen during the &#383;un's decline.</p>
+
+<p>Maria impatiently wi&#383;hed to &#383;ee her
+fellow-&#383;ufferer; but Darnford was &#383;till
+more earne&#383;t to obtain an interview.
+Accu&#383;tomed to &#383;ubmit to every impul&#383;e
+of pa&#383;&#383;ion, and never taught, like
+women, to re&#383;train the mo&#383;t natural,
+and acquire, in&#383;tead of the bewitching
+frankne&#383;s of nature, a factitious propriety
+of behaviour, every de&#383;ire became
+a torrent that bore down all oppo&#383;ition.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-53_S" id="APg_1-53_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-53.png">53</a>]</span>
+His travelling trunk, which contained
+the books lent to Maria, had
+been &#383;ent to him, and with a part of
+its contents he bribed his principal
+keeper; who, after receiving the mo&#383;t
+&#383;olemn promi&#383;e that he would return
+to his apartment without attempting
+to explore any part of the hou&#383;e, conducted
+him, in the du&#383;k of the evening,
+to Maria's room.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima had apprized her charge of
+the vi&#383;it, and &#383;he expected with trembling
+impatience, in&#383;pired by a vague
+hope that he might again prove her
+deliverer, to &#383;ee a man who had before
+re&#383;cued her from oppre&#383;&#383;ion. He entered
+with an animation of countenance,
+formed to captivate an enthu&#383;ia&#383;t;
+and, ha&#383;tily turned his eyes from
+her to the apartment, which he &#383;urveyed
+with apparent emotions of com<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-54_S" id="APg_1-54_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-54.png">54</a>]</span>pa&#383;&#383;ionate
+indignation. Sympathy illuminated
+his eye, and, taking her hand,
+he re&#383;pectfully bowed on it, exclaiming&mdash;"This
+is extraordinary!&mdash;again
+to meet you, and in &#383;uch circum&#383;tances!"
+Still, impre&#383;&#383;ive as was the
+coincidence of events which brought
+them once more together, their full
+hearts did not overflow.&mdash;<a name="AFNanchor_54-A_3_S" id="AFNanchor_54-A_3_S"></a><a href="#AFootnote_54-A_3_S" class="fnanchor">[54-A]</a></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>[And though, after this fir&#383;t vi&#383;it,
+they were permitted frequently to repeat
+their interviews, they were for
+&#383;ome time employed in] a re&#383;erved
+conver&#383;ation, to which all the world<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-55_S" id="APg_1-55_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-55.png">55</a>]</span>
+might have li&#383;tened; excepting, when
+di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ing &#383;ome literary &#383;ubject, fla&#383;hes
+of &#383;entiment, inforced by each relaxing
+feature, &#383;eemed to remind them
+that their minds were already acquainted.</p>
+
+<p>[By degrees, Darnford entered into
+the particulars of his &#383;tory.] In a few
+words, he informed her that he had been
+a thoughtle&#383;s, extravagant young man;
+yet, as he de&#383;cribed his faults, they appeared
+to be the generous luxuriancy of
+a noble mind. Nothing like meanne&#383;s
+tarni&#383;hed the lu&#383;tre of his youth, nor had
+the worm of &#383;elfi&#383;hne&#383;s lurked in the unfolding
+bud, even while he had been the
+dupe of others. Yet he tardily acquired
+the experience nece&#383;&#383;ary to guard
+him again&#383;t future impo&#383;ition.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;hall weary you," continued he,
+"by my egoti&#383;m; and did not power<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-56_S" id="APg_1-56_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-56.png">56</a>]</span>ful
+emotions draw me to you,"&mdash;his
+eyes gli&#383;tened as he &#383;poke, and a trembling
+&#383;eemed to run through his manly
+frame,&mdash;"I would not wa&#383;te the&#383;e precious
+moments in talking of my&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>"My father and mother were people
+of fa&#383;hion; married by their parents. He
+was fond of the turf, &#383;he of the card-table.
+I, and two or three other children
+&#383;ince dead, were kept at home
+till we became intolerable. My father
+and mother had a vi&#383;ible di&#383;like
+to each other, continually di&#383;played;
+the &#383;ervants were of the depraved kind
+u&#383;ually found in the hou&#383;es of people
+of fortune. My brothers and parents
+all dying, I was left to the care of
+guardians, and &#383;ent to Eton. I never
+knew the &#383;weets of dome&#383;tic affection,
+but I felt the want of indulgence and
+frivolous re&#383;pect at &#383;chool. I will not<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-57_S" id="APg_1-57_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-57.png">57</a>]</span>
+di&#383;gu&#383;t you with a recital of the vices
+of my youth, which can &#383;carcely be comprehended
+by female delicacy. I was
+taught to love by a creature I am
+a&#383;hamed to mention; and the other
+women with whom I afterwards became
+intimate, were of a cla&#383;s of which
+you can have no knowledge. I formed
+my acquaintance with them at the
+theatres; and, when vivacity danced
+in their eyes, I was not ea&#383;ily di&#383;gu&#383;ted
+by the vulgarity which flowed from
+their lips. Having &#383;pent, a few years
+after I was of age, [the whole of] a
+con&#383;iderable patrimony, excepting a
+few hundreds, I had no <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 're&#383;ource'">recour&#383;e</ins> but
+to purcha&#383;e a commi&#383;&#383;ion in a new-rai&#383;ed
+regiment, de&#383;tined to &#383;ubjugate
+America. The regret I felt to renounce
+a life of plea&#383;ure, was counter-balanced
+by the curio&#383;ity I had to &#383;ee<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-58_S" id="APg_1-58_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-58.png">58</a>]</span>
+America, or rather to travel; [nor
+had any of tho&#383;e circum&#383;tances occurred
+to my youth, which might have
+been calculated] to bind my country
+to my heart. I &#383;hall not trouble you
+with the details of a military life. My
+blood was &#383;till kept in motion; till,
+towards the clo&#383;e of the conte&#383;t, I was
+wounded and taken pri&#383;oner.</p>
+
+<p>"Confined to my bed, or chair, by a
+lingering cure, my only refuge from
+the preying activity of my mind, was
+books, which I read with great avidity,
+profiting by the conver&#383;ation of my
+ho&#383;t, a man of &#383;ound under&#383;tanding.
+My political &#383;entiments now underwent
+a total change; and, dazzled by
+the ho&#383;pitality of the Americans, I
+determined to take up my abode with
+freedom. I, therefore, with my u&#383;ual
+impetuo&#383;ity, &#383;old my commi&#383;&#383;ion, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-59_S" id="APg_1-59_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-59.png">59</a>]</span>
+travelled into the interior parts of the
+country, to lay out my money to advantage.
+Added to this, I did not
+much like the puritanical manners of
+the large towns. Inequality of condition
+was there mo&#383;t di&#383;gu&#383;tingly galling.
+The only plea&#383;ure wealth afforded,
+was to make an o&#383;tentatious
+di&#383;play of it; for the cultivation of
+the fine arts, or literature, had not introduced
+into the fir&#383;t circles that poli&#383;h
+of manners which renders the rich &#383;o e&#383;&#383;entially
+&#383;uperior to the poor in Europe.
+Added to this, an influx of vices had
+been let in by the Revolution, and the
+mo&#383;t rigid principles of religion &#383;haken
+to the centre, before the under&#383;tanding
+could be gradually emancipated from
+the prejudices which led their ance&#383;tors
+undauntedly to &#383;eek an inho&#383;pitable
+clime and unbroken &#383;oil. The re&#383;olu<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-60_S" id="APg_1-60_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-60.png">60</a>]</span>tion,
+that led them, in pur&#383;uit of independence,
+to embark on rivers like
+&#383;eas, to &#383;earch for unknown &#383;hores,
+and to &#383;leep under the hovering mi&#383;ts
+of endle&#383;s fore&#383;ts, who&#383;e baleful damps
+agued their limbs, was now turned into
+commercial &#383;peculations, till the national
+character exhibited a phenomenon
+in the hi&#383;tory of the human mind&mdash;a
+head enthu&#383;ia&#383;tically enterpri&#383;ing, with
+cold &#383;elfi&#383;hne&#383;s of heart. And woman,
+lovely woman!&mdash;they charm every
+where&mdash;&#383;till there is a degree of prudery,
+and a want of ta&#383;te and ea&#383;e in
+the manners of the American women,
+that renders them, in &#383;pite of their ro&#383;es
+and lilies, far inferior to our European
+charmers. In the country, they have
+often a bewitching &#383;implicity of character;
+but, in the cities, they have all
+the airs and ignorance of the ladies who<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-61_S" id="APg_1-61_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-61.png">61</a>]</span>
+give the tone to the circles of the large
+trading towns in England. They are
+fond of their ornaments, merely becau&#383;e
+they are good, and not becau&#383;e
+they embelli&#383;h their per&#383;ons; and are
+more gratified to in&#383;pire the women
+with jealou&#383;y of the&#383;e exterior advantages,
+than the men with love. All
+the frivolity which often (excu&#383;e me,
+Madam) renders the &#383;ociety of mode&#383;t
+women &#383;o &#383;tupid in England, here
+&#383;eemed to throw &#383;till more leaden fetters
+on their charms. Not being an
+adept in gallantry, I found that I could
+only keep my&#383;elf awake in their company
+by making downright love to
+them.</p>
+
+<p>"But, not to intrude on your patience,
+I retired to the track of land
+which I had purcha&#383;ed in the country,
+and my time pa&#383;&#383;ed plea&#383;antly enough<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-62_S" id="APg_1-62_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-62.png">62</a>]</span>
+while I cut down the trees, built my
+hou&#383;e, and planted my different crops.
+But winter and idlene&#383;s came, and I
+longed for more elegant &#383;ociety, to hear
+what was pa&#383;&#383;ing in the world, and to
+do &#383;omething better than vegetate with
+the animals that made a very con&#383;iderable
+part of my hou&#383;ehold. Con&#383;equently,
+I determined to travel. Motion was
+a &#383;ub&#383;titute for variety of objects; and,
+pa&#383;&#383;ing over immen&#383;e tracks of country,
+I exhau&#383;ted my exuberant &#383;pirits, without
+obtaining much experience. I every
+where &#383;aw indu&#383;try the fore-runner
+and not the con&#383;equence, of luxury;
+but this country, every thing being on
+an ample &#383;cale, did not afford tho&#383;e
+picture&#383;que views, which a certain degree
+of cultivation is nece&#383;&#383;ary gradually
+to produce. The eye wandered
+without an object to fix upon over im<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-63_S" id="APg_1-63_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-63.png">63</a>]</span>mea&#383;ureable
+plains, and lakes that &#383;eemed
+repleni&#383;hed by the ocean, whil&#383;t eternal
+fore&#383;ts of &#383;mall clu&#383;tering trees, ob&#383;tructed
+the circulation of air, and embarra&#383;&#383;ed
+the path, without gratifying
+the eye of ta&#383;te. No cottage &#383;miling in
+the wa&#383;te, no travellers hailed us, to give
+life to &#383;ilent nature; or, if perchance
+we &#383;aw the print of a foot&#383;tep in our
+path, it was a dreadful warning to turn
+a&#383;ide; and the head ached as if a&#383;&#383;ailed
+by the &#383;calping knife. The Indians
+who hovered on the &#383;kirts of the European
+&#383;ettlements had only learned of
+their neighbours to plunder, and they
+&#383;tole their guns from them to do it with
+more &#383;afety.</p>
+
+<p>"From the woods and back &#383;ettlements,
+I returned to the towns, and
+learned to eat and drink mo&#383;t valiantly;
+but without entering into commerce<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-64_S" id="APg_1-64_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+(and I dete&#383;ted commerce) I found I
+could not live there; and, growing heartily
+weary of the land of liberty and
+vulgar ari&#383;tocracy, &#383;eated on her bags
+of dollars, I re&#383;olved once more to vi&#383;it
+Europe. I wrote to a di&#383;tant relation
+in England, with whom I had been
+educated, mentioning the ve&#383;&#383;el in
+which I intended to &#383;ail. Arriving in
+London, my &#383;en&#383;es were intoxicated. I
+ran from &#383;treet to &#383;treet, from theatre
+to theatre, and the women of the town
+(again I mu&#383;t beg pardon for my habitual
+frankne&#383;s) appeared to me like
+angels.</p>
+
+<p>"A week was &#383;pent in this thoughtle&#383;s
+manner, when, returning very late
+to the hotel in which I had lodged ever
+&#383;ince my arrival, I was knocked down
+in a private &#383;treet, and hurried, in a &#383;tate
+of in&#383;en&#383;ibility, into a coach, which<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-65_S" id="APg_1-65_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-65.png">65</a>]</span>
+brought me hither, and I only recovered
+my &#383;en&#383;es to be treated like one
+who had lo&#383;t them. My keepers are
+deaf to my remon&#383;trances and enquiries,
+yet a&#383;&#383;ure me that my confinement
+&#383;hall not la&#383;t long. Still I cannot gue&#383;s,
+though I weary my&#383;elf with conjectures,
+why I am confined, or in what
+part of England this hou&#383;e is &#383;ituated.
+I imagine &#383;ometimes that I hear the
+&#383;ea roar, and wi&#383;hed my&#383;elf again on
+the Atlantic, till I had a glimp&#383;e of
+you<a name="AFNanchor_65-A_4_S" id="AFNanchor_65-A_4_S"></a><a href="#AFootnote_65-A_4_S" class="fnanchor">[65-A]</a>."</p>
+
+<p>A few moments were only allowed to
+Maria to comment on this narrative,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-66_S" id="APg_1-66_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-66.png">66</a>]</span>
+when Darnford left her to her own
+thoughts, to the "never ending, &#383;till
+beginning," ta&#383;k of weighing his words,
+recollecting his tones of voice, and feeling
+them reverberate on her heart.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_54-A_3_S" id="AFootnote_54-A_3_S"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_54-A_3_S"><span class="label">[54-A]</span></a> The copy which had received the author's
+la&#383;t corrections, breaks off in this place, and the
+pages which follow, to the end of Chap. IV, are
+printed from a copy in a le&#383;s fini&#383;hed &#383;tate.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_65-A_4_S" id="AFootnote_65-A_4_S"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_65-A_4_S"><span class="label">[65-A]</span></a> The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer
+of Maria in a former in&#383;tance, appears to have
+been an after-thought of the author. This has
+occa&#383;ioned the omi&#383;&#383;ion of any allu&#383;ion to that
+circum&#383;tance in the preceding narration.
+</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-67_S" id="APg_1-67_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-67.png">67</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_IV_S" id="ACHAP_IV_S"></a>CHAP. IV.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Pity</span>, and the forlorn &#383;eriou&#383;ne&#383;s of
+adver&#383;ity, have both been con&#383;idered as
+di&#383;po&#383;itions favourable to love, while
+&#383;atirical writers have attributed the
+propen&#383;ity to the relaxing effect of
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing comma">idlene&#383;s,</ins> what chance then had Maria
+of e&#383;caping, when pity, &#383;orrow,
+and &#383;olitude all con&#383;pired to &#383;often her
+mind, and nouri&#383;h romantic wi&#383;hes,
+and, from a natural progre&#383;s, romantic
+expectations?</p>
+
+<p>Maria was &#383;ix-and-twenty. But,
+&#383;uch was the native &#383;oundne&#383;s of her
+con&#383;titution, that time had only given
+to her countenance the character of her
+mind. Revolving thought, and exerci&#383;ed
+affections had bani&#383;hed &#383;ome of<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-68_S" id="APg_1-68_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-68.png">68</a>]</span>
+the playful graces of innocence, producing
+in&#383;en&#383;ibly that irregularity of
+features which the &#383;truggles of the under&#383;tanding
+to trace or govern the
+&#383;trong emotions of the heart, are wont
+to imprint on the yielding ma&#383;s. Grief
+and care had mellowed, without ob&#383;curing,
+the bright tints of youth, and
+the thoughtfulne&#383;s which re&#383;ided on her
+brow did not take from the feminine
+&#383;oftne&#383;s of her features; nay, &#383;uch was
+the &#383;en&#383;ibility which often mantled over
+it, that &#383;he frequently appeared, like a
+large proportion of her &#383;ex, only born
+to feel; and the activity of her well-proportioned,
+and even almo&#383;t voluptuous
+figure, in&#383;pired the idea of
+&#383;trength of mind, rather than of body.
+There was a &#383;implicity &#383;ometimes indeed
+in her manner, which bordered
+on infantine ingenuou&#383;ne&#383;s, that led peo<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-69_S" id="APg_1-69_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-69.png">69</a>]</span>ple
+of common di&#383;cernment to underrate
+her talents, and &#383;mile at the flights
+of her imagination. But tho&#383;e who
+could not comprehend the delicacy of
+her &#383;entiments, were attached by her
+unfailing &#383;ympathy, &#383;o that &#383;he was very
+generally beloved by characters of very
+different de&#383;criptions; &#383;till, &#383;he was too
+much under the influence of an ardent
+imagination to adhere to common rules.</p>
+
+<p>There are mi&#383;takes of conduct which
+at five-and-twenty prove the &#383;trength of
+the mind, that, ten or fifteen years after,
+would demon&#383;trate its weakne&#383;s, its incapacity
+to acquire a &#383;ane judgment.
+The youths who are &#383;ati&#383;fied with the
+ordinary plea&#383;ures of life, and do not
+&#383;igh after ideal phantoms of love and
+friend&#383;hip, will never arrive at great maturity
+of under&#383;tanding; but if the&#383;e reveries
+are cheri&#383;hed, as is too frequently<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-70_S" id="APg_1-70_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-70.png">70</a>]</span>
+the ca&#383;e with women, when experience
+ought to have taught them in what human
+happine&#383;s con&#383;i&#383;ts, they become as
+u&#383;ele&#383;s as they are wretched. Be&#383;ides,
+their pains and plea&#383;ures are &#383;o dependent
+on outward circum&#383;tances, on the
+objects of their affections, that they
+&#383;eldom act from the impul&#383;e of a nerved
+mind, able to choo&#383;e its own pur&#383;uit.</p>
+
+<p>Having had to &#383;truggle ince&#383;&#383;antly
+with the vices of mankind, Maria's
+imagination found repo&#383;e in pourtraying
+the po&#383;&#383;ible virtues the world might
+contain. Pygmalion formed an ivory
+maid, and longed for an informing &#383;oul.
+She, on the contrary, combined all the
+qualities of a hero's mind, and fate
+pre&#383;ented a &#383;tatue in which &#383;he might
+en&#383;hrine them.</p>
+
+<p>We mean not to trace the progre&#383;s
+of this pa&#383;&#383;ion, or recount how often<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-71_S" id="APg_1-71_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-71.png">71</a>]</span>
+Darnford and Maria were obliged to
+part in the mid&#383;t of an intere&#383;ting conver&#383;ation.
+Jemima ever watched on
+the tip-toe of fear, and frequently &#383;eparated
+them on a fal&#383;e alarm, when
+they would have given worlds to remain
+a little longer together.</p>
+
+<p>A magic lamp now &#383;eemed to be &#383;u&#383;pended
+in Maria's pri&#383;on, and fairy
+land&#383;capes flitted round the gloomy
+walls, late &#383;o blank. Ru&#383;hing from the
+depth of de&#383;pair, on the &#383;eraph wing of
+hope, &#383;he found her&#383;elf happy.&mdash;She was
+beloved, and every emotion was rapturous.</p>
+
+<p>To Darnford &#383;he had not &#383;hown a decided
+affection; the fear of outrunning
+his, a &#383;ure proof of love, made her often
+a&#383;&#383;ume a coldne&#383;s and indifference foreign
+from her character; and, even when
+giving way to the playful emotions of a<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-72_S" id="APg_1-72_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-72.png">72</a>]</span>
+heart ju&#383;t loo&#383;ened from the frozen
+bond of grief, there was a delicacy in
+her manner of expre&#383;&#383;ing her &#383;en&#383;ibility,
+which made him doubt whether it
+was the effect of love.</p>
+
+<p>One evening, when Jemima left them,
+to li&#383;ten to the &#383;ound of a di&#383;tant foot&#383;tep,
+which &#383;eemed cautiou&#383;ly to approach,
+he &#383;eized Maria's hand&mdash;it was
+not withdrawn. They conver&#383;ed with
+earne&#383;tne&#383;s of their &#383;ituation; and, during
+the conver&#383;ation, he once or twice
+gently drew her towards him. He felt
+the fragrance of her breath, and longed,
+yet feared, to touch the lips from
+which it i&#383;&#383;ued; &#383;pirits of purity &#383;eemed
+to guard them, while all the enchanting
+graces of love &#383;ported on her cheeks,
+and langui&#383;hed in her eyes.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima entering, he reflected on his
+diffidence with poignant regret, and,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-73_S" id="APg_1-73_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-73.png">73</a>]</span>
+&#383;he once more taking alarm, he ventured,
+as Maria &#383;tood near his chair, to
+approach her lips with a declaration of
+love. She drew back with &#383;olemnity,
+he hung down his head aba&#383;hed; but
+lifting his eyes timidly, they met her's;
+&#383;he had determined, during that in&#383;tant,
+and &#383;uffered their rays to mingle. He
+took, with more ardour, rea&#383;&#383;ured, a
+half-con&#383;enting, half-reluctant ki&#383;s, reluctant
+only from mode&#383;ty; and there
+was a &#383;acredne&#383;s in her dignified manner
+of reclining her glowing face on
+his &#383;houlder, that powerfully impre&#383;&#383;ed
+him. De&#383;ire was lo&#383;t in more ineffable
+emotions, and to protect her from in&#383;ult
+and &#383;orrow&mdash;to make her happy,
+&#383;eemed not only the fir&#383;t wi&#383;h of his heart,
+but the mo&#383;t noble duty of his life.
+Such angelic confidence demanded the
+fidelity of honour; but could he, feel<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-74_S" id="APg_1-74_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-74.png">74</a>]</span>ing
+her in every pul&#383;ation, could he
+ever change, could he be a villain? The
+emotion with which &#383;he, for a moment,
+allowed her&#383;elf to be pre&#383;&#383;ed to his bo&#383;om,
+the tear of rapturous &#383;ympathy,
+mingled with a &#383;oft melancholy &#383;entiment
+of recollected di&#383;appointment,
+&#383;aid&mdash;more of truth and faithfulne&#383;s,
+than the tongue could have given utterance
+to in hours! They were &#383;ilent&mdash;yet
+di&#383;cour&#383;ed, how eloquently? till,
+after a moment's reflection, Maria drew
+her chair by the &#383;ide of his, and, with
+a compo&#383;ed &#383;weetne&#383;s of voice, and
+&#383;upernatural benignity of countenance,
+&#383;aid, "I mu&#383;t open my whole heart
+to you; you mu&#383;t be told who I am,
+why I am here, and why, telling you
+I am a wife, I blu&#383;h not to"&mdash;the blu&#383;h
+&#383;poke the re&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima was again at her elbow, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-75_S" id="APg_1-75_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-75.png">75</a>]</span>
+the re&#383;traint of her pre&#383;ence did not
+prevent an animated conver&#383;ation, in
+which love, &#383;ly urchin, was ever at bo-peep.</p>
+
+<p>So much of heaven did they enjoy,
+that paradi&#383;e bloomed around them; or
+they, by a powerful &#383;pell, had been
+tran&#383;ported into Armida's garden. Love,
+the grand enchanter, "lapt them in Ely&#383;ium,"
+and every &#383;en&#383;e was harmonized
+to joy and &#383;ocial extacy. So animated,
+indeed, were their accents of tenderne&#383;s,
+in di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ing what, in other circum&#383;tances,
+would have been common-place
+&#383;ubjects, that Jemima felt, with
+&#383;urpri&#383;e, a tear of plea&#383;ure trickling
+down her rugged cheeks. She wiped
+it away, half a&#383;hamed; and when Maria
+kindly enquired the cau&#383;e, with all
+the eager &#383;olicitude of a happy being
+wi&#383;hing to impart to all nature its<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-76_S" id="APg_1-76_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-76.png">76</a>]</span>
+overflowing felicity, Jemima owned
+that it was the fir&#383;t tear that &#383;ocial enjoyment
+had ever drawn from her. She
+&#383;eemed indeed to breathe more freely;
+the cloud of &#383;u&#383;picion cleared away
+from her brow; &#383;he felt her&#383;elf, for
+once in her life, treated like a fellow-creature.</p>
+
+<p>Imagination! who can paint thy
+power; or reflect the evane&#383;cent tints
+of hope fo&#383;tered by thee? A de&#383;pondent
+gloom had long ob&#383;cured Maria's horizon&mdash;now
+the &#383;un broke forth, the
+rainbow appeared, and every pro&#383;pect
+was fair. Horror &#383;till reigned in the
+darkened cells, &#383;u&#383;picion lurked in the
+pa&#383;&#383;ages, and whi&#383;pered along the
+walls. The yells of men po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed,
+&#383;ometimes made them pau&#383;e, and wonder
+that they felt &#383;o happy, in a tomb
+of living death. They even chid them<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-77_S" id="APg_1-77_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-77.png">77</a>]</span>&#383;elves
+for &#383;uch apparent in&#383;en&#383;ibility;
+&#383;till the world contained not three happier
+beings. And Jemima, after again
+patrolling the pa&#383;&#383;age, was &#383;o &#383;oftened
+by the air of confidence which breathed
+around her, that &#383;he voluntarily began
+an account of her&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-78_S" id="APg_1-78_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-78.png">78</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_V_S" id="ACHAP_V_S"></a>CHAP. V.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">My</span> father," &#383;aid Jemima, "&#383;educed
+my mother, a pretty girl, with whom
+he lived fellow-&#383;ervant; and &#383;he no
+&#383;ooner perceived the natural, the dreaded
+con&#383;equence, than the terrible conviction
+fla&#383;hed on her&mdash;that &#383;he was
+ruined. Hone&#383;ty, and a regard for her
+reputation, had been the only principles
+inculcated by her mother; and
+they had been &#383;o forcibly impre&#383;&#383;ed, that
+&#383;he feared &#383;hame, more than the poverty
+to which it would lead. Her ince&#383;&#383;ant
+importunities to prevail upon my father
+to &#383;creen her from reproach by marrying
+her, as he had promi&#383;ed in the
+fervour of &#383;eduction, e&#383;tranged him from
+her &#383;o completely, that her very per&#383;on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-79_S" id="APg_1-79_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-79.png">79</a>]</span>
+became di&#383;ta&#383;teful to him; and he began
+to hate, as well as de&#383;pi&#383;e me, before
+I was born.</p>
+
+<p>"My mother, grieved to the &#383;oul by
+his neglect, and unkind treatment, actually
+re&#383;olved to fami&#383;h her&#383;elf; and
+injured her health by the attempt;
+though &#383;he had not &#383;ufficient re&#383;olution
+to adhere to her project, or renounce it
+entirely. Death came not at her call;
+yet &#383;orrow, and the methods &#383;he adopted
+to conceal her condition, &#383;till doing the
+work of a hou&#383;e-maid, had &#383;uch an
+effect on her con&#383;titution, that &#383;he died
+in the wretched garret, where her virtuous
+mi&#383;tre&#383;s had forced her to take
+refuge in the very pangs of labour,
+though my father, after a &#383;light reproof,
+was allowed to remain in his place&mdash;allowed
+by the mother of &#383;ix children,
+who, &#383;carcely permitting a foot&#383;tep to<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-80_S" id="APg_1-80_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-80.png">80</a>]</span>
+be heard, during her month's indulgence,
+felt no &#383;ympathy for the poor
+wretch, denied every comfort required
+by her &#383;ituation.</p>
+
+<p>"The day my mother died, the
+ninth after my birth, I was con&#383;igned
+to the care of the cheape&#383;t nur&#383;e my
+father could find; who &#383;uckled her own
+child at the &#383;ame time, and lodged as
+many more as &#383;he could get, in two
+cellar-like apartments.</p>
+
+<p>"Poverty, and the habit of &#383;eeing
+children die off her hands, had &#383;o
+hardened her heart, that the office of a
+mother did not awaken the tenderne&#383;s
+of a woman; nor were the feminine
+care&#383;&#383;es which &#383;eem a part of the rearing
+of a child, ever be&#383;towed on me.
+The chicken has a wing to &#383;helter under;
+but I had no bo&#383;om to ne&#383;tle in,
+no kindred warmth to fo&#383;ter me. Left<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-81_S" id="APg_1-81_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-81.png">81</a>]</span>
+in dirt, to cry with cold and hunger
+till I was weary, and &#383;leep without ever
+being prepared by exerci&#383;e, or lulled
+by kindne&#383;s to re&#383;t; could I be expected
+to become any thing but a weak and
+rickety babe? Still, in &#383;pite of neglect,
+I continued to exi&#383;t, to learn to
+cur&#383;e exi&#383;tence,<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads '['">"</ins> her countenance grew
+ferocious as &#383;he &#383;poke, <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads ']'">"</ins>and the treatment
+that rendered me mi&#383;erable, &#383;eemed
+to &#383;harpen my wits. Confined then
+in a damp hovel, to rock the cradle of
+the &#383;ucceeding tribe, I looked like a
+little old woman, or a hag &#383;hrivelling into
+nothing. The furrows of reflection and
+care contracted the youthful cheek,
+and gave a &#383;ort of &#383;upernatural wildne&#383;s
+to the ever watchful eye. During
+this period, my father had married another
+fellow-&#383;ervant, who loved him
+le&#383;s, and knew better how to manage<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-82_S" id="APg_1-82_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+his pa&#383;&#383;ion, than my mother. She likewi&#383;e
+proving with child, they agreed
+to keep a &#383;hop: my &#383;tep-mother, if, being
+an illegitimate off&#383;pring, I may
+venture thus to characterize her, having
+obtained a &#383;um of a rich relation,
+for that purpo&#383;e.</p>
+
+<p>"Soon after her lying-in, &#383;he prevailed
+on my father to take me home, to &#383;ave
+the expence of maintaining me, and
+of hiring a girl to a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t her in the care
+of the child. I was young, it was true,
+but appeared a knowing little thing,
+and might be made handy. Accordingly
+I was brought to her hou&#383;e; but
+not to a home&mdash;for a home I never
+knew. Of this child, a daughter, &#383;he
+was extravagantly fond; and it was a
+part of my employment, to a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t to &#383;poil
+her, by humouring all her whims, and
+bearing all her caprices. Feeling her<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-83_S" id="APg_1-83_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-83.png">83</a>]</span>
+own con&#383;equence, before &#383;he could
+&#383;peak, &#383;he had learned the art of tormenting
+me, and if I ever dared to re&#383;i&#383;t,
+I received blows, laid on with no
+compunctious hand, or was &#383;ent to bed
+dinnerle&#383;s, as well as &#383;upperle&#383;s. I &#383;aid
+that it was a part of my daily labour to
+attend this child, with the &#383;ervility of a
+&#383;lave; &#383;till it was but a part. I was
+&#383;ent out in all &#383;ea&#383;ons, and from place
+to place, to carry burdens far above
+my &#383;trength, without being allowed to
+draw near the fire, or ever being
+cheered by encouragement or kindne&#383;s.
+No wonder then, treated like a
+creature of another &#383;pecies, that I began
+to envy, and at length to hate,
+the darling of the hou&#383;e. Yet, I perfectly
+remember, that it was the care&#383;&#383;es,
+and kind expre&#383;&#383;ions of my &#383;tep-mother,
+which fir&#383;t excited my jealous<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-84_S" id="APg_1-84_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-84.png">84</a>]</span>
+di&#383;content. Once, I cannot forget it,
+when &#383;he was calling in vain her wayward
+child to ki&#383;s her, I ran to her,
+&#383;aying, 'I will ki&#383;s you, ma'am!' and
+how did my heart, which was in my
+mouth, &#383;ink, what was my deba&#383;ement
+of &#383;oul, when pu&#383;hed away with&mdash;'I
+do not want you, pert thing!'
+Another day, when a new gown had
+excited the highe&#383;t good humour, and
+&#383;he uttered the appropriate <i>dear</i>, addre&#383;&#383;ed
+unexpectedly to me, I thought
+I could never do enough to plea&#383;e her;
+I was all alacrity, and ro&#383;e proportionably
+in my own e&#383;timation.</p>
+
+<p>"As her daughter grew up, &#383;he was
+pampered with cakes and fruit, while
+I was, literally &#383;peaking, fed with the
+refu&#383;e of the table, with her leavings.
+A liquori&#383;h tooth is, I believe, common
+to children, and I u&#383;ed to &#383;teal any<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-85_S" id="APg_1-85_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-85.png">85</a>]</span>
+thing &#383;weet, that I could catch up with
+a chance of concealment. When detected,
+&#383;he was not content to cha&#383;tize
+me her&#383;elf at the moment, but, on my
+father's return in the evening (he was
+a &#383;hopman), the principal di&#383;cour&#383;e was
+to recount my faults, and attribute
+them to the wicked di&#383;po&#383;ition which I
+had brought into the world with me,
+inherited from my mother. He did not
+fail to leave the marks of his re&#383;entment
+on my body, and then &#383;olaced
+him&#383;elf by playing with my &#383;i&#383;ter.&mdash;I
+could have murdered her at tho&#383;e moments.
+To &#383;ave my&#383;elf from the&#383;e unmerciful
+corrections, I re&#383;orted to fal&#383;hood,
+and the untruths which I &#383;turdily
+maintained, were brought in judgment
+again&#383;t me, to &#383;upport my tyrant's
+inhuman charge of my natural propen&#383;ity
+to vice. Seeing me treated with<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-86_S" id="APg_1-86_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-86.png">86</a>]</span>
+contempt, and always being fed and
+dre&#383;&#383;ed better, my &#383;i&#383;ter conceived a
+contemptuous opinion of me, that
+proved an ob&#383;tacle to all affection; and
+my father, hearing continually of my
+faults, began to con&#383;ider me as a cur&#383;e
+entailed on him for his &#383;ins: he was
+therefore ea&#383;ily prevailed on to bind
+me apprentice to one of my &#383;tep-mother's
+friends, who kept a &#383;lop-&#383;hop in
+Wapping. I was repre&#383;ented (as it
+was &#383;aid) in my true colours; but &#383;he,
+'warranted,' &#383;napping her fingers,
+'that &#383;he &#383;hould break my &#383;pirit or
+heart.'</p>
+
+<p>"My mother replied, with a whine,
+'that if any body could make me better,
+it was &#383;uch a clever woman as her&#383;elf;
+though, for her own part, &#383;he had
+tried in vain; but good-nature was her
+fault.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-87_S" id="APg_1-87_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+"I &#383;hudder with horror, when I recollect
+the treatment I had now to endure.
+Not only under the la&#383;h of my ta&#383;k-mi&#383;tre&#383;s,
+but the drudge of the maid,
+apprentices and children, I never had
+a ta&#383;te of human kindne&#383;s to &#383;often the
+rigour of perpetual labour. I had been
+introduced as an object of abhorrence
+into the family; as a creature of whom
+my &#383;tep-mother, though &#383;he had been
+kind enough to let me live in the hou&#383;e
+with her own child, could make nothing.
+I was de&#383;cribed as a wretch,
+who&#383;e no&#383;e mu&#383;t be kept to the grinding
+&#383;tone&mdash;and it was held there with
+an iron gra&#383;p. It &#383;eemed indeed the
+privilege of their &#383;uperior nature to kick
+me about, like the dog or cat. If I
+were attentive, I was called fawning,
+if refractory, an ob&#383;tinate mule, and
+like a mule I received their cen&#383;ure on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-88_S" id="APg_1-88_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-88.png">88</a>]</span>
+my loaded back. Often has my mi&#383;tre&#383;s,
+for &#383;ome in&#383;tance of forgetfulne&#383;s, thrown
+me from one &#383;ide of the kitchen to the
+other, knocked my head again&#383;t the
+wall, &#383;pit in my face, with various refinements
+on barbarity that I forbear to
+enumerate, though they were all acted
+over again by the &#383;ervant, with additional
+in&#383;ults, to which the appellation
+of <i>ba&#383;tard</i>, was commonly added, with
+taunts or &#383;neers. But I will not attempt
+to give you an adequate idea of
+my &#383;ituation, le&#383;t you, who probably
+have never been drenched with the
+dregs of human mi&#383;ery, &#383;hould think I
+exaggerate.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;tole now, from ab&#383;olute nece&#383;&#383;ity,&mdash;bread;
+yet whatever el&#383;e was
+taken, which I had it not in my power
+to take, was a&#383;cribed to me. I was
+the filching cat, the ravenous dog, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-89_S" id="APg_1-89_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-89.png">89</a>]</span>
+dumb brute, who mu&#383;t bear all; for if
+I endeavoured to exculpate my&#383;elf, I
+was &#383;ilenced, without any enquiries
+being made, with 'Hold your tongue,
+you never tell truth.' Even the very
+air I breathed was tainted with &#383;corn;
+for I was &#383;ent to the neighbouring &#383;hops
+with Glutton, Liar, or Thief, written on
+my forehead. This was, at fir&#383;t, the
+mo&#383;t bitter puni&#383;hment; but &#383;ullen
+pride, or a kind of &#383;tupid de&#383;peration,
+made me, at length, almo&#383;t regardle&#383;s
+of the contempt, which had wrung
+from me &#383;o many &#383;olitary tears at the
+only moments when I was allowed to
+re&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>"Thus was I the mark of cruelty till
+my &#383;ixteenth year; and then I have
+only to point out a change of mi&#383;ery;
+for a period I never knew. Allow me
+fir&#383;t to make one ob&#383;ervation. Now I<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-90_S" id="APg_1-90_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-90.png">90</a>]</span>
+look back, I cannot help attributing the
+greater part of my mi&#383;ery, to the mi&#383;fortune
+of having been thrown into the
+world without the grand &#383;upport of life&mdash;a
+mother's affection. I had no one to
+love me; or to make me re&#383;pected, to
+enable me to acquire re&#383;pect. I was an
+egg dropped on the &#383;and; a pauper by
+nature, <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'hunted'">&#383;hunted</ins> from family to family,
+who belonged to nobody&mdash;and nobody
+cared for me. I was de&#383;pi&#383;ed from my
+birth, and denied the chance of obtaining
+a footing for my&#383;elf in &#383;ociety. Yes;
+I had not even the chance of being
+con&#383;idered as a fellow-creature&mdash;yet all
+the people with whom I lived, brutalized
+as they were by the low cunning
+of trade, and the de&#383;picable &#383;hifts of
+poverty, were not without bowels,
+though they never yearned for me. I
+was, in fact, born a &#383;lave, and chained<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-91_S" id="APg_1-91_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-91.png">91</a>]</span>
+by infamy to &#383;lavery during the whole
+of exi&#383;tence, without having any companions
+to alleviate it by &#383;ympathy, or
+teach me how to ri&#383;e above it by their
+example. But, to re&#383;ume the thread of
+my tale&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>"At &#383;ixteen, I &#383;uddenly grew tall,
+and &#383;omething like comeline&#383;s appeared
+on a Sunday, when I had time to wa&#383;h
+my face, and put on clean clothes. My
+ma&#383;ter had once or twice caught hold
+of me in the pa&#383;&#383;age; but I in&#383;tinctively
+avoided his di&#383;gu&#383;ting care&#383;&#383;es. One
+day however, when the family were
+at a methodi&#383;t meeting, he contrived to
+be alone in the hou&#383;e with me, and by
+blows&mdash;yes; blows and menaces, compelled
+me to &#383;ubmit to his ferocious
+de&#383;ire; and, to avoid my mi&#383;tre&#383;s's
+fury, I was obliged in future to comply,
+and &#383;kulk to my loft at his com<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-92_S" id="APg_1-92_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-92.png">92</a>]</span>mand,
+in &#383;pite of increa&#383;ing loathing.</p>
+
+<p>"The angui&#383;h which was now pent
+up in my bo&#383;om, &#383;eemed to open a new
+world to me: I began to extend my
+thoughts beyond my&#383;elf, and grieve
+for human mi&#383;ery, till I di&#383;covered,
+with horror&mdash;ah! what horror!&mdash;that I
+was with child. I know not why I felt
+a mixed &#383;en&#383;ation of de&#383;pair and tenderne&#383;s,
+excepting that, ever called a
+ba&#383;tard, a ba&#383;tard appeared to me an
+object of the greate&#383;t compa&#383;&#383;ion in
+creation.</p>
+
+<p>"I communicated this dreadful circum&#383;tance
+to my ma&#383;ter, who was almo&#383;t
+equally alarmed at the intelligence;
+for he feared his wife, and public
+cen&#383;ure at the meeting. After &#383;ome
+weeks of deliberation had elap&#383;ed, I in
+continual fear that my altered &#383;hape<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-93_S" id="APg_1-93_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-93.png">93</a>]</span>
+would be noticed, my ma&#383;ter gave me
+a medicine in a phial, which he de&#383;ired
+me to take, telling me, without any
+circumlocution, for what purpo&#383;e it
+was de&#383;igned. I bur&#383;t into tears, I
+thought it was killing my&#383;elf&mdash;yet was
+&#383;uch a &#383;elf as I worth pre&#383;erving? He
+cur&#383;ed me for a fool, and left me to my
+own reflections. I could not re&#383;olve to
+take this infernal potion; but I wrapped
+it up in an old gown, and hid it
+in a corner of my box.</p>
+
+<p>"Nobody yet &#383;u&#383;pected me, becau&#383;e
+they had been accu&#383;tomed to view me
+as a creature of another &#383;pecies. But
+the threatening &#383;torm at la&#383;t broke over
+my devoted head&mdash;never &#383;hall I forget
+it! One Sunday evening when I was
+left, as u&#383;ual, to take care of the hou&#383;e,
+my ma&#383;ter came home intoxicated, and
+I became the prey of his brutal appe<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-94_S" id="APg_1-94_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-94.png">94</a>]</span>tite.
+His extreme intoxication made
+him forget his cu&#383;tomary caution, and
+my mi&#383;tre&#383;s entered and found us in a
+&#383;ituation that could not have been more
+hateful to her than me. Her hu&#383;band
+was 'pot-valiant,' he feared her not
+at the moment, nor had he then much
+rea&#383;on, for &#383;he in&#383;tantly turned the
+whole force of her anger another
+way. She tore off my cap, &#383;cratched,
+kicked, and buffetted me, till &#383;he had
+exhau&#383;ted her &#383;trength, declaring, as &#383;he
+re&#383;ted her arm, 'that I had wheedled
+her hu&#383;band from her.&mdash;But, could any
+thing better be expected from a wretch,
+whom &#383;he had taken into her hou&#383;e out
+of pure charity?' What a torrent of
+abu&#383;e ru&#383;hed out? till, almo&#383;t breathle&#383;s,
+&#383;he concluded with &#383;aying, 'that I
+was born a &#383;trumpet; it ran in my<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-95_S" id="APg_1-95_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+blood, and nothing good could come
+to tho&#383;e who harboured me.'</p>
+
+<p>"My &#383;ituation was, of cour&#383;e, di&#383;covered,
+and &#383;he declared that I &#383;hould
+not &#383;tay another night under the &#383;ame
+roof with an hone&#383;t family. I was
+therefore pu&#383;hed out of doors, and my
+trumpery thrown after me, when it had
+been contemptuou&#383;ly examined in the
+pa&#383;&#383;age, le&#383;t I &#383;hould have &#383;tolen any
+thing.</p>
+
+<p>"Behold me then in the &#383;treet, utterly
+de&#383;titute! Whither could I creep for
+&#383;helter? To my father's roof I had no
+claim, when not pur&#383;ued by &#383;hame&mdash;now
+I &#383;hrunk back as from death, from
+my mother's cruel reproaches, my father's
+execrations. I could not endure
+to hear him cur&#383;e the day I was born,
+though life had been a cur&#383;e to me. Of
+death I thought, but with a confu&#383;ed<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-96_S" id="APg_1-96_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-96.png">96</a>]</span>
+emotion of terror, as I &#383;tood leaning
+my head on a po&#383;t, and &#383;tarting at every
+foot&#383;tep, le&#383;t it &#383;hould be my mi&#383;tre&#383;s
+coming to tear my heart out. One of
+the boys of the &#383;hop pa&#383;&#383;ing by, heard
+my tale, and immediately repaired to
+his ma&#383;ter, to give him a de&#383;cription of
+my &#383;ituation; and he touched the right
+key&mdash;the &#383;candal it would give ri&#383;e to,
+if I were left to repeat my tale to every
+enquirer. This plea came home to his
+rea&#383;on, who had been &#383;obered by his
+wife's rage, the fury of which fell on
+him when I was out of her reach, and
+he &#383;ent the boy to me with half-a-guinea,
+de&#383;iring him to conduct me to a
+hou&#383;e, where beggars, and other
+wretches, the refu&#383;e of &#383;ociety, nightly
+lodged.</p>
+
+<p>"This night was &#383;pent in a &#383;tate of
+&#383;tupefaction, or de&#383;peration. I dete&#383;ted
+mankind, and abhorred my&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-97_S" id="APg_1-97_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-97.png">97</a>]</span>
+"In the morning I ventured out, to
+throw my&#383;elf in my ma&#383;ter's way, at his
+u&#383;ual hour of going abroad. I approached
+him, he 'damned me for a
+b&mdash;&mdash;, declared I had di&#383;turbed the
+peace of the family, and that he had
+&#383;worn to his wife, never to take any
+more notice of me.' He left me; but,
+in&#383;tantly returning, he told me that he
+&#383;hould &#383;peak to his friend, a pari&#383;h-officer,
+to get a nur&#383;e for the brat I laid
+to him; and advi&#383;ed me, if I wi&#383;hed to
+keep out of the hou&#383;e of correction, not
+to make free with his name.</p>
+
+<p>"I hurried back to my hole, and, rage
+giving place to de&#383;pair, &#383;ought for the
+potion that was to procure abortion, and
+&#383;wallowed it, with a wi&#383;h that it might
+de&#383;troy me, at the &#383;ame time that it
+&#383;topped the &#383;en&#383;ations of new-born life,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-98_S" id="APg_1-98_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-98.png">98</a>]</span>
+which I felt with inde&#383;cribable emotion.
+My head turned round, my heart grew
+&#383;ick, and in the horrors of approaching
+di&#383;&#383;olution, mental angui&#383;h was &#383;wallowed
+up. The effect of the medicine
+was violent, and I was confined to my
+bed &#383;everal days; but, youth and a
+&#383;trong con&#383;titution prevailing, I once
+more crawled out, to a&#383;k my&#383;elf the
+cruel que&#383;tion, 'Whither I &#383;hould
+go?' I had but two &#383;hillings left in
+my pocket, the re&#383;t had been expended,
+by a poor woman who &#383;lept in the
+&#383;ame room, to pay for my lodging,
+and purcha&#383;e the nece&#383;&#383;aries of which
+&#383;he partook.</p>
+
+<p>"With this wretch I went into the
+neighbouring &#383;treets to beg, and my
+di&#383;con&#383;olate appearance drew a few
+pence from the idle, enabling me &#383;till
+to command a bed; till, recovering<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-99_S" id="APg_1-99_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-99.png">99</a>]</span>
+from my illne&#383;s, and taught to put on
+my rags to the be&#383;t advantage, I was
+acco&#383;ted from different motives, and
+yielded to the de&#383;ire of the brutes I met,
+with the &#383;ame dete&#383;tation that I had
+felt for my &#383;till more brutal ma&#383;ter.
+I have &#383;ince read in novels of the blandi&#383;hments
+of &#383;eduction, but I had not
+even the plea&#383;ure of being enticed
+into vice.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;hall not," interrupted Jemima,
+"lead your imagination into all the
+&#383;cenes of wretchedne&#383;s and depravity,
+which I was condemned to view; or
+mark the different &#383;tages of my deba&#383;ing
+mi&#383;ery. Fate dragged me
+through the very kennels of &#383;ociety;
+I was &#383;till a &#383;lave, a ba&#383;tard, a common
+property. Become familiar with vice,
+for I wi&#383;h to conceal nothing from you,
+I picked the pockets of the drunkards<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-100_S" id="APg_1-100_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-100.png">100</a>]</span>
+who abu&#383;ed me; and proved by my
+conduct, that I de&#383;erved the epithets,
+with which they loaded me at moments
+when di&#383;tru&#383;t ought to cea&#383;e.</p>
+
+<p>"Dete&#383;ting my nightly occupation,
+though valuing, if I may &#383;o u&#383;e the
+word, my independence, which only
+con&#383;i&#383;ted in choo&#383;ing the &#383;treet in which
+I &#383;hould wander, or the roof, when I
+had money, in which I &#383;hould hide my
+head, I was &#383;ome time before I could
+prevail on my&#383;elf to accept of a place
+in a hou&#383;e of ill fame, to which a girl,
+with whom I had accidentally conver&#383;ed
+in the &#383;treet, had recommended
+me. I had been hunted almo&#383;t into a
+a fever, by the watchmen of the quarter
+of the town I frequented; one,
+whom I had unwittingly offended, giving
+the word to the whole pack. You
+can &#383;carcely conceive the tyranny ex<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-101_S" id="APg_1-101_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-101.png">101</a>]</span>erci&#383;ed
+by the&#383;e wretches: con&#383;idering
+them&#383;elves as the in&#383;truments of
+the very laws they violate, the pretext
+which &#383;teels their con&#383;cience, hardens
+their heart. Not content with receiving
+from us, outlaws of &#383;ociety (let
+other women talk of favours) a brutal
+gratification gratuitou&#383;ly as a privilege
+of office, they extort a tithe of pro&#383;titution,
+and harra&#383;s with threats the
+poor creatures who&#383;e occupation affords
+not the means to &#383;ilence the growl of
+avarice. To e&#383;cape from this per&#383;ecution,
+I once more entered into &#383;ervitude.</p>
+
+<p>"A life of comparative regularity
+re&#383;tored my health; and&mdash;do not &#383;tart&mdash;my
+manners were improved, in a &#383;ituation
+where vice &#383;ought to render it&#383;elf
+alluring, and ta&#383;te was cultivated to
+fa&#383;hion the per&#383;on, if not to refine the
+mind. Be&#383;ides, the common civility of<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-102_S" id="APg_1-102_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+&#383;peech, contra&#383;ted with the gro&#383;s vulgarity
+to which I had been accu&#383;tomed,
+was &#383;omething like the poli&#383;h of civilization.
+I was not &#383;hut out from all intercour&#383;e
+of humanity. Still I was galled
+by the yoke of &#383;ervice, and my mi&#383;tre&#383;s
+often flying into violent fits of pa&#383;&#383;ion,
+made me dread a &#383;udden di&#383;mi&#383;&#383;ion,
+which I under&#383;tood was always the
+ca&#383;e. I was therefore prevailed on,
+though I felt a horror of men, to accept
+the offer of a gentleman, rather in the
+decline of years, to keep his hou&#383;e,
+plea&#383;antly &#383;ituated in a little village
+near Hamp&#383;tead.</p>
+
+<p>"He was a man of great talents, and
+of brilliant wit; but, a worn-out votary
+of voluptuou&#383;ne&#383;s, his de&#383;ires became
+fa&#383;tidious in proportion as they
+grew weak, and the native tenderne&#383;s
+of his heart was undermined by a vi<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-103_S" id="APg_1-103_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-103.png">103</a>]</span>tiated
+imagination. A thoughtle&#383;s <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'carreer'">career</ins>
+of libertini&#383;m and &#383;ocial enjoyment,
+had injured his health to &#383;uch a
+degree, that, whatever plea&#383;ure his conver&#383;ation
+afforded me (and my e&#383;teem
+was en&#383;ured by proofs of the generous
+humanity of his di&#383;po&#383;ition), the being
+his mi&#383;tre&#383;s was purcha&#383;ing it at a very
+dear rate. With &#383;uch a keen perception
+of the delicacies of &#383;entiment,
+with an imagination invigorated by
+the exerci&#383;e of genius, how could he
+&#383;ink into the gro&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s of &#383;en&#383;uality!</p>
+
+<p>"But, to pa&#383;s over a &#383;ubject which I
+recollect with pain, I mu&#383;t remark to
+you, as an an&#383;wer to your often-repeated
+que&#383;tion, 'Why my &#383;entiments and
+language were &#383;uperior to my &#383;tation?'
+that I now began to read, to beguile
+the tediou&#383;ne&#383;s of &#383;olitude, and to
+gratify an inqui&#383;itive, active mind. I<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-104_S" id="APg_1-104_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+had often, in my childhood, followed a
+ballad-&#383;inger, to hear the &#383;equel of a
+di&#383;mal &#383;tory, though &#383;ure of being &#383;everely
+puni&#383;hed for delaying to return
+with whatever I was &#383;ent to purcha&#383;e. I
+could ju&#383;t &#383;pell and put a &#383;entence together,
+and I li&#383;tened to the various arguments,
+though often mingled with
+ob&#383;cenity, which occurred at the table
+where I was allowed to pre&#383;ide: for a
+literary friend or two frequently came
+home with my ma&#383;ter, to dine and pa&#383;s
+the night. Having lo&#383;t the privileged re&#383;pect
+of my &#383;ex, my pre&#383;ence, in&#383;tead
+of re&#383;training, perhaps gave the reins
+to their tongues; &#383;till I had the advantage
+of hearing di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ions, from which,
+in the common cour&#383;e of life, women
+are excluded.</p>
+
+<p>"You may ea&#383;ily imagine, that it
+was only by degrees that I could com<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-105_S" id="APg_1-105_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-105.png">105</a>]</span>prehend
+&#383;ome of the &#383;ubjects they inve&#383;tigated,
+or acquire from their rea&#383;oning
+what might be termed a moral
+&#383;en&#383;e. But my fondne&#383;s of reading increa&#383;ing,
+and my ma&#383;ter occa&#383;ionally
+&#383;hutting him&#383;elf up in this retreat, for
+weeks together, to write, I had many
+opportunities of improvement. At
+fir&#383;t, con&#383;idering money <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '(I was right!&quot; exclaimed'">I was right!" (</ins>exclaimed Jemima, altering her tone of
+voice) "as the only means, after my lo&#383;s
+of reputation, of obtaining re&#383;pect, or
+even the toleration of humanity, I had
+not the lea&#383;t &#383;cruple to &#383;ecrete a part of
+the &#383;ums intru&#383;ted to me, and to &#383;creen
+my&#383;elf from detection by a &#383;y&#383;tem of
+fal&#383;hood. But, acquiring new principles,
+I began to have the ambition of
+returning to the re&#383;pectable part of &#383;ociety,
+and was weak enough to &#383;uppo&#383;e
+it po&#383;&#383;ible. The attention of my una&#383;<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-106_S" id="APg_1-106_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-106.png">106</a>]</span>&#383;uming
+in&#383;tructor, who, without being
+ignorant of his own powers, po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed
+great &#383;implicity of manners, &#383;trengthened
+the illu&#383;ion. Having &#383;ometimes
+caught up hints for thought, from my
+untutored remarks, he often led me to
+di&#383;cu&#383;s the &#383;ubjects he was treating,
+and would read to me his productions,
+previous to their publication, wi&#383;hing
+to profit by the critici&#383;m of un&#383;ophi&#383;ticated
+feeling. The aim of his writings
+was to touch the &#383;imple &#383;prings of
+the heart; for he de&#383;pi&#383;ed the would-be
+oracles, the &#383;elf-elected philo&#383;ophers,
+who fright away fancy, while &#383;ifting
+each grain of thought to prove that
+&#383;lowne&#383;s of comprehen&#383;ion is wi&#383;dom.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;hould have di&#383;tingui&#383;hed this as
+a moment of &#383;un&#383;hine, a happy period
+in my life, had not the repugnance the
+di&#383;gu&#383;ting libertini&#383;m of my protector<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-107_S" id="APg_1-107_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-107.png">107</a>]</span>
+in&#383;pired, daily become more painful.&mdash;And,
+indeed, I &#383;oon did recollect it as
+&#383;uch with agony, when his &#383;udden
+death (for he had recour&#383;e to the mo&#383;t
+exhilarating cordials to keep up the
+convivial tone of his &#383;pirits) again
+threw me into the de&#383;ert of human &#383;ociety.
+Had he had any time for reflection,
+I am certain he would have
+left the little property in his power to
+me: but, attacked by the fatal apoplexy
+in town, his heir, a man of
+rigid morals, brought his wife with
+him to take po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of the hou&#383;e and
+effects, before I was even informed of
+his death,&mdash;'to prevent,' as &#383;he took
+care indirectly to tell me, '&#383;uch a
+creature as &#383;he &#383;uppo&#383;ed me to be, from
+purloining any of them, had I been
+apprized of the event in time.'</p>
+
+<p>"The grief I felt at the &#383;udden<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-108_S" id="APg_1-108_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-108.png">108</a>]</span>
+&#383;hock the information gave me, which
+at fir&#383;t had nothing &#383;elfi&#383;h in it, was
+treated with contempt, and I was ordered
+to pack up my clothes; and a few
+trinkets and books, given me by the
+generous decea&#383;ed, were conte&#383;ted,
+while they piou&#383;ly hoped, with a reprobating
+&#383;hake of the head, 'that
+God would have mercy on his &#383;inful
+&#383;oul!' With &#383;ome difficulty, I obtained
+my arrears of wages; but a&#383;king&mdash;&#383;uch
+is the &#383;pirit-grinding con&#383;equence
+of poverty and infamy&mdash;for a character
+for hone&#383;ty and economy, which God
+knows I merited, I was told by this&mdash;why
+mu&#383;t I call her woman?&mdash;'that
+it would go again&#383;t her con&#383;cience to
+recommend a kept mi&#383;tre&#383;s.' Tears
+&#383;tarted in my eyes, burning tears; for
+there are &#383;ituations in which a wretch<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-109_S" id="APg_1-109_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-109.png">109</a>]</span>
+is humbled by the contempt they are
+con&#383;cious they do not de&#383;erve.</p>
+
+<p>"I returned to the metropolis; but
+the &#383;olitude of a poor lodging was inconceivably
+dreary, after the &#383;ociety I
+had enjoyed. To be cut off from human
+conver&#383;e, now I had been taught
+to reli&#383;h it, was to wander a gho&#383;t
+among the living. Be&#383;ides, I fore&#383;aw, to
+aggravate the &#383;everity of my fate, that
+my little pittance would &#383;oon melt
+away. I endeavoured to obtain needlework;
+but, not having been taught early,
+and my hands being rendered clum&#383;y
+by hard work, I did not &#383;ufficiently excel
+to be employed by the ready-made
+linen &#383;hops, when &#383;o many women,
+better qualified, were &#383;uing for it.
+The want of a character prevented my
+getting a place; for, irk&#383;ome as &#383;ervitude
+would have been to me, I &#383;hould<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-110_S" id="APg_1-110_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-110.png">110</a>]</span>
+have made another trial, had it been
+fea&#383;ible. Not that I di&#383;liked employment,
+but the inequality of condition
+to which I mu&#383;t have &#383;ubmitted.
+I had acquired a ta&#383;te for literature,
+during the five years I had lived with
+a literary man, occa&#383;ionally conver&#383;ing
+with men of the fir&#383;t abilities of the
+age; and now to de&#383;cend to the lowe&#383;t
+vulgarity, was a degree of wretchedne&#383;s
+not to be imagined unfelt. I had
+not, it is true, ta&#383;ted the charms of affection,
+but I had been familiar with
+the graces of humanity.</p>
+
+<p>"One of the gentlemen, whom I
+had frequently dined in company with,
+while I was treated like a companion,
+met me in the &#383;treet, and enquired
+after my health. I &#383;eized the occa&#383;ion,
+and began to de&#383;cribe my &#383;ituation;
+but he was in ha&#383;te to join, at dinner,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-111_S" id="APg_1-111_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-111.png">111</a>]</span>
+a &#383;elect party of choice &#383;pirits; therefore,
+without waiting to hear me, he
+impatiently put a guinea into my hand,
+&#383;aying, 'It was a pity &#383;uch a &#383;en&#383;ible
+woman &#383;hould be in di&#383;tre&#383;s&mdash;he wi&#383;hed
+me well from his &#383;oul.'</p>
+
+<p>"To another I wrote, &#383;tating my ca&#383;e,
+and reque&#383;ting advice. He was an advocate
+for unequivocal &#383;incerity; and
+had often, in my pre&#383;ence, de&#383;canted
+on the evils which ari&#383;e in &#383;ociety from
+the de&#383;poti&#383;m of rank and riches.</p>
+
+<p>"In reply, I received a long e&#383;&#383;ay on
+the energy of the human mind, with
+continual allu&#383;ions to his own force of
+character. He added, 'That the woman
+who could write &#383;uch a letter as I
+had &#383;ent him, could never be in want
+of re&#383;ources, were &#383;he to look into her&#383;elf,
+and exert her powers; mi&#383;ery was
+the con&#383;equence of indolence, and, as<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-112_S" id="APg_1-112_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-112.png">112</a>]</span>
+to my being &#383;hut out from &#383;ociety, it
+was the lot of man to &#383;ubmit to certain
+privations.'</p>
+
+<p>"How often have I heard," &#383;aid
+Jemima, interrupting her narrative,
+"in conver&#383;ation, and read in books,
+that every per&#383;on willing to work may
+find employment? It is the vague a&#383;&#383;ertion,
+I believe, of in&#383;en&#383;ible indolence,
+when it relates to men; but, with
+re&#383;pect to women, I am &#383;ure of its fallacy,
+unle&#383;s they will &#383;ubmit to the
+mo&#383;t menial bodily labour; and even
+to be employed at hard labour is out of
+the reach of many, who&#383;e reputation
+mi&#383;fortune or folly has tainted.</p>
+
+<p>"How writers, profe&#383;&#383;ing to be friends
+to freedom, and the improvement of
+morals, can a&#383;&#383;ert that poverty is no
+evil, I cannot imagine."</p>
+
+<p>"No more can I," interrupted Ma<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-113_S" id="APg_1-113_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-113.png">113</a>]</span>ria,
+"yet they even expatiate on the
+peculiar happine&#383;s of indigence, though
+in what it can con&#383;i&#383;t, excepting in
+brutal re&#383;t, when a man can barely earn
+a &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;tence, I cannot imagine. The
+mind is nece&#383;&#383;arily impri&#383;oned in its
+own little tenement; and, fully occupied
+by keeping it in repair, has not
+time to rove abroad for improvement.
+The book of knowledge is clo&#383;ely
+cla&#383;ped, again&#383;t tho&#383;e who mu&#383;t fulfil
+their daily ta&#383;k of &#383;evere manual labour
+or die; and curio&#383;ity, rarely excited by
+thought or information, &#383;eldom moves
+on the &#383;tagnate lake of ignorance."</p>
+
+<p>"As far as I have been able to ob&#383;erve,"
+replied Jemima, "prejudices,
+caught up by chance, are ob&#383;tinately
+maintained by the poor, to the exclu&#383;ion
+of improvement; they have not
+time to rea&#383;on or reflect to any extent,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-114_S" id="APg_1-114_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+or minds &#383;ufficiently exerci&#383;ed to adopt
+the principles of action, which form
+perhaps the only ba&#383;is of contentment
+in every &#383;tation<a name="AFNanchor_114-A_5_S" id="AFNanchor_114-A_5_S"></a><a href="#AFootnote_114-A_5_S" class="fnanchor">[114-A]</a>."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>"And independence," &#383;aid Darnford,
+"they are nece&#383;&#383;arily &#383;trangers to,
+even the independence of de&#383;pi&#383;ing their
+per&#383;ecutors. If the poor are happy, or
+can be happy, <i>things are very well as they
+are</i>. And I cannot conceive on what
+principle tho&#383;e writers contend for a
+change of &#383;y&#383;tem, who &#383;upport this
+opinion. The authors on the other
+&#383;ide of the que&#383;tion are much more
+con&#383;i&#383;tent, who grant the fact; yet, in&#383;i&#383;ting
+that it is the lot of the majority<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-115_S" id="APg_1-115_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+to be oppre&#383;&#383;ed in this life, kindly turn
+them over to another, to rectify the
+fal&#383;e weights and mea&#383;ures of this, as
+the only way to ju&#383;tify the di&#383;pen&#383;ations
+of Providence. I have not," continued
+Darnford, "an opinion more firmly
+fixed by ob&#383;ervation in my mind, than
+that, though riches may fail to produce
+proportionate happine&#383;s, poverty mo&#383;t
+commonly excludes it, by &#383;hutting up
+all the avenues to improvement."</p>
+
+<p>"And as for the affections," added
+Maria, with a &#383;igh, "how gro&#383;s, and
+even tormenting do they become, unle&#383;s
+regulated by an improving mind!
+The culture of the heart ever, I believe,
+keeps pace with that of the
+mind. But pray go on," addre&#383;&#383;ing
+Jemima, "though your narrative gives
+ri&#383;e to the mo&#383;t painful reflections on
+the pre&#383;ent &#383;tate of &#383;ociety."</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-116_S" id="APg_1-116_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-116.png">116</a>]</span>
+"Not to trouble you," continued
+&#383;he, "with a detailed de&#383;cription of all
+the painful feelings of unavailing exertion,
+I have only to tell you, that at
+la&#383;t I got recommended to wa&#383;h in a
+few families, who did me the favour
+to admit me into their hou&#383;es, without
+the mo&#383;t &#383;trict enquiry, to wa&#383;h from
+one in the morning till eight at night,
+for eighteen or twenty-pence a day.
+On the happine&#383;s to be enjoyed over a
+wa&#383;hing-tub I need not comment; yet
+you will allow me to ob&#383;erve, that this
+was a wretchedne&#383;s of &#383;ituation peculiar
+to my &#383;ex. A man with half my indu&#383;try,
+and, I may &#383;ay, abilities, could
+have procured a decent livelihood, and
+di&#383;charged &#383;ome of the duties which
+knit mankind together; whil&#383;t I, who
+had acquired a ta&#383;te for the rational, nay,
+in hone&#383;t pride let me a&#383;&#383;ert it, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-117_S" id="APg_1-117_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+virtuous enjoyments of life, was ca&#383;t
+a&#383;ide as the filth of &#383;ociety. Condemned
+to labour, like a machine, only
+to earn bread, and &#383;carcely that, I became
+melancholy and de&#383;perate.</p>
+
+<p>"I have now to mention a circum&#383;tance
+which fills me with remor&#383;e, and
+fear it will entirely deprive me of your
+e&#383;teem. A trade&#383;man became attached
+to me, and vi&#383;ited me frequently,&mdash;and
+I at la&#383;t obtained &#383;uch a power over
+him, that he offered to take me home
+to his hou&#383;e.&mdash;Con&#383;ider, dear madam,
+I was fami&#383;hing: wonder not that I became
+a wolf!&mdash;The only rea&#383;on for not
+taking me home immediately, was the
+having a girl in the hou&#383;e, with child
+by him&mdash;and this girl&mdash;I advi&#383;ed him&mdash;yes,
+I did! would I could forget it!&mdash;to
+turn out of doors: and one night he
+determined to follow my advice, Poor<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-118_S" id="APg_1-118_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+wretch! &#383;he fell upon her knees, reminded
+him that he had promi&#383;ed to
+marry her, that her parents were hone&#383;t!&mdash;What
+did it avail?&mdash;She was turned
+out.</p>
+
+<p>"She approached her father's door,
+in the &#383;kirts of London,&mdash;li&#383;tened at
+the &#383;hutters,&mdash;but could not knock. A
+watchman had ob&#383;erved her go and
+return &#383;everal times&mdash;Poor wretch!&mdash;<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads '['">"</ins> The
+remor&#383;e Jemima &#383;poke of, &#383;eemed
+to be &#383;tinging her to the &#383;oul, as &#383;he
+proceeded.<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: Errata: original reads ']'">"</ins></p>
+
+<p>"She left it, and, approaching a
+tub where hor&#383;es were watered, &#383;he
+&#383;at down in it, and, with de&#383;perate re&#383;olution,
+remained in that attitude&mdash;till
+re&#383;olution was no longer nece&#383;&#383;ary!</p>
+
+<p>"I happened that morning to be
+going out to wa&#383;h, anticipating the
+moment when I &#383;hould e&#383;cape from<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-119_S" id="APg_1-119_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-119.png">119</a>]</span>
+&#383;uch hard labour. I pa&#383;&#383;ed by, ju&#383;t as
+&#383;ome men, going to work, drew out
+the &#383;tiff, cold corp&#383;e&mdash;Let me not recal
+the horrid moment!&mdash;I recognized
+her pale vi&#383;age; I li&#383;tened to the tale
+told by the &#383;pectators, and my heart
+did not bur&#383;t. I thought of my own
+&#383;tate, and wondered how I could be
+&#383;uch a mon&#383;ter!&mdash;I worked hard; and,
+returning home, I was attacked by a
+fever. I &#383;uffered both in body and mind.
+I determined not to live with the
+wretch. But he did not try me; he
+left the neighbourhood. I once more
+returned to the wa&#383;h-tub.</p>
+
+<p>"Still this &#383;tate, mi&#383;erable as it was,
+admitted of aggravation. Lifting one
+day a heavy load, a tub fell again&#383;t my
+&#383;hin, and gave me great pain. I did
+not pay much attention to the hurt,
+till it became a &#383;erious wound; being<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-120_S" id="APg_1-120_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-120.png">120</a>]</span>
+obliged to work as u&#383;ual, or &#383;tarve.
+But, finding my&#383;elf at length unable
+to &#383;tand for any time, I thought of
+getting into an ho&#383;pital. Ho&#383;pitals, it
+&#383;hould &#383;eem (for they are comfortle&#383;s
+abodes for the &#383;ick) were expre&#383;&#383;ly endowed
+for the reception of the friendle&#383;s;
+yet I, who had on that plea a
+right to a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance, wanted the recommendation
+of the rich and re&#383;pectable,
+and was &#383;everal weeks langui&#383;hing for admittance;
+fees were demanded on entering;
+and, what was &#383;till more unrea&#383;onable,
+&#383;ecurity for burying me, that expence
+not coming into the letter of the
+charity. A guinea was the &#383;tipulated &#383;um&mdash;I
+could as &#383;oon have rai&#383;ed a million;
+and I was afraid to apply to the pari&#383;h
+for an order, le&#383;t they &#383;hould have
+pa&#383;&#383;ed me, I knew not whither. The
+poor woman at who&#383;e hou&#383;e I lodged,
+compa&#383;&#383;ionating my &#383;tate, got me into<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-121_S" id="APg_1-121_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-121.png">121</a>]</span>
+the ho&#383;pital; and the family where I
+received the hurt, &#383;ent me five &#383;hillings,
+three and &#383;ix-pence of which I gave at
+my admittance&mdash;I know not for what.</p>
+
+<p>"My leg grew quickly better; but
+I was di&#383;mi&#383;&#383;ed before my cure was
+completed, becau&#383;e I could not afford
+to have my linen wa&#383;hed to appear decently,
+as the virago of a nur&#383;e &#383;aid,
+when the gentlemen (the &#383;urgeons)
+came. I cannot give you an adequate
+idea of the wretchedne&#383;s of an ho&#383;pital;
+every thing is left to the care of people
+intent on gain. The attendants &#383;eem
+to have lo&#383;t all feeling of compa&#383;&#383;ion in
+the bu&#383;tling di&#383;charge of their offices;
+death is &#383;o familiar to them, that they
+are not anxious to ward it off. Every
+thing appeared to be conducted for the
+accommodation of the medical men
+and their pupils, who came to make<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-122_S" id="APg_1-122_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-122.png">122</a>]</span>
+experiments on the poor, for the benefit
+of the rich. One of the phy&#383;icians,
+I mu&#383;t not forget to mention, gave me
+half-a-crown, and ordered me &#383;ome
+wine, when I was at the lowe&#383;t ebb. I
+thought of making my ca&#383;e known to
+the lady-like matron; but her forbidding
+countenance prevented me. She
+conde&#383;cended to look on the patients,
+and make general enquiries, two or
+three times a week; but the nur&#383;es
+knew the hour when the vi&#383;it of ceremony
+would commence, and every
+thing was as it &#383;hould be.</p>
+
+<p>"After my di&#383;mi&#383;&#383;ion, I was more at
+a lo&#383;s than ever for a &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;tence, and,
+not to weary you with a repetition of
+the &#383;ame unavailing attempts, unable
+to &#383;tand at the wa&#383;hing-tub, I began to
+con&#383;ider the rich and poor as natural
+enemies, and became a thief from prin<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-123_S" id="APg_1-123_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-123.png">123</a>]</span>ciple.
+I could not now cea&#383;e to rea&#383;on,
+but I hated mankind. I de&#383;pi&#383;ed my&#383;elf,
+yet I ju&#383;tified my conduct. I was
+taken, tried, and condemned to &#383;ix
+months' impri&#383;onment in a hou&#383;e of
+correction. My &#383;oul recoils with horror
+from the remembrance of the in&#383;ults I
+had to endure, till, branded with &#383;hame,
+I was turned loo&#383;e in the &#383;treet, pennyle&#383;s.
+I wandered from &#383;treet to &#383;treet,
+till, exhau&#383;ted by hunger and fatigue, I
+&#383;unk down &#383;en&#383;ele&#383;s at a door, where
+I had vainly demanded a mor&#383;el of
+bread. I was &#383;ent by the inhabitant to
+the work-hou&#383;e, to which he had &#383;urlily
+bid me go, &#383;aying, he 'paid enough
+in con&#383;cience to the poor,' when, with
+parched tongue, I implored his charity.
+If tho&#383;e well-meaning people who exclaim
+again&#383;t beggars, were acquainted
+with the treatment the poor receive in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-124_S" id="APg_1-124_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-124.png">124</a>]</span>
+many of the&#383;e wretched a&#383;ylums, they
+would not &#383;tifle &#383;o ea&#383;ily involuntary
+&#383;ympathy, by &#383;aying that they have all
+pari&#383;hes to go to, or wonder that the
+poor dread to enter the gloomy walls.
+What are the common run of work-hou&#383;es,
+but pri&#383;ons, in which many
+re&#383;pectable old people, worn out by
+immoderate labour, &#383;ink into the grave
+in &#383;orrow, to which they are carried
+like dogs!"</p>
+
+<p>Alarmed by &#383;ome indi&#383;tinct noi&#383;e,
+Jemima ro&#383;e ha&#383;tily to li&#383;ten, and Maria,
+turning to Darnford, &#383;aid, "I have indeed
+been &#383;hocked beyond expre&#383;&#383;ion
+when I have met a pauper's funeral. A
+coffin carried on the &#383;houlders of three
+or four ill-looking wretches, whom the
+imagination might ea&#383;ily convert into a
+band of a&#383;&#383;a&#383;&#383;ins, ha&#383;tening to conceal
+the corp&#383;e, and quarrelling about the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-125_S" id="APg_1-125_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+prey on their way. I know it is of
+little con&#383;equence how we are con&#383;igned
+to the earth; but I am led by
+this brutal in&#383;en&#383;ibility, to what even
+the animal creation appears forcibly to
+feel, to advert to the wretched, de&#383;erted
+manner in which they died."</p>
+
+<p>"True," rejoined Darnford, "and,
+till the rich will give more than a part
+of their wealth, till they will give time
+and attention to the wants of the di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ed,
+never let them boa&#383;t of charity.
+Let them open their hearts, and not
+their pur&#383;es, and employ their minds
+in the &#383;ervice, if they are really actuated
+by humanity; or charitable in&#383;titutions
+will always be the prey of the
+lowe&#383;t order of knaves."</p>
+
+<p>Jemima returning, &#383;eemed in ha&#383;te
+to fini&#383;h her tale. "The over&#383;eer
+farmed the poor of different pari&#383;hes,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-126_S" id="APg_1-126_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-126.png">126</a>]</span>
+and out of the bowels of poverty was
+wrung the money with which he purcha&#383;ed
+this dwelling, as a private receptacle
+for madne&#383;s. He had been
+a keeper at a hou&#383;e of the &#383;ame de&#383;cription,
+and conceived that he could
+make money much more readily in his
+old occupation. He is a &#383;hrewd&mdash;&#383;hall
+I &#383;ay it?&mdash;villain. He ob&#383;erved &#383;omething
+re&#383;olute in my manner, and offered
+to take me with him, and in&#383;truct
+me how to treat the di&#383;turbed minds he
+meant to intru&#383;t to my care. The
+offer of forty pounds a year, and to quit
+a workhou&#383;e, was not to be de&#383;pi&#383;ed,
+though the condition of &#383;hutting my
+eyes and hardening my heart was annexed
+to it.</p>
+
+<p>"I agreed to accompany him; and
+four years have I been attendant on
+many wretches, and"&mdash;&#383;he lowered<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-127_S" id="APg_1-127_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-127.png">127</a>]</span>
+her voice,&mdash;"the witne&#383;s of many
+enormities. In &#383;olitude my mind
+&#383;eemed to recover its force, and many
+of the &#383;entiments which I imbibed in
+the only tolerable period of my life, returned
+with their full force. Still
+what &#383;hould induce me to be the champion
+for &#383;uffering humanity?&mdash;Who
+ever ri&#383;ked any thing for me?&mdash;Who
+ever acknowledged me to be a fellow-creature?"&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Maria took her hand, and Jemima,
+more overcome by kindne&#383;s than &#383;he
+had ever been by cruelty, ha&#383;tened out
+of the room to conceal her emotions.</p>
+
+<p>Darnford &#383;oon after heard his &#383;ummons,
+and, taking leave of him, Maria
+promi&#383;ed to gratify his curio&#383;ity,
+with re&#383;pect to her&#383;elf, the fir&#383;t
+opportunity.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="AFootnote_114-A_5_S" id="AFootnote_114-A_5_S"></a><a href="#AFNanchor_114-A_5_S"><span class="label">[114-A]</span></a> The copy which appears to have received the
+author's la&#383;t corrections, ends at this place.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-128_S" id="APg_1-128_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-128.png">128</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_VI_S" id="ACHAP_VI_S"></a>CHAP. VI.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Active</span> as love was in the heart
+of Maria, the &#383;tory &#383;he had ju&#383;t heard
+made her thoughts take a wider range.
+The opening buds of hope clo&#383;ed, as
+if they had put forth too early, and the
+the happie&#383;t day of her life was overca&#383;t
+by the mo&#383;t melancholy reflections.
+Thinking of Jemima's peculiar fate
+and her own, &#383;he was led to con&#383;ider
+the oppre&#383;&#383;ed &#383;tate of women, and to
+lament that &#383;he had given birth to a
+daughter. Sleep fled from her eyelids,
+while &#383;he dwelt on the wretchedne&#383;s
+of unprotected infancy, till &#383;ympathy
+with Jemima changed to agony,
+when it &#383;eemed probable that her own<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-129_S" id="APg_1-129_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-129.png">129</a>]</span>
+babe might even now be in the very
+&#383;tate &#383;he &#383;o forcibly de&#383;cribed.</p>
+
+<p>Maria thought, and thought again.
+Jemima's humanity had rather been
+benumbed than killed, by the keen
+fro&#383;t &#383;he had to brave at her entrance
+into life; an appeal then to her feelings,
+on this tender point, &#383;urely
+would not be fruitle&#383;s; and Maria began
+to anticipate the delight it would
+afford her to gain intelligence of her
+child. This project was now the only
+&#383;ubject of reflection; and &#383;he watched
+impatiently for the dawn of day, with
+that determinate purpo&#383;e which generally
+in&#383;ures &#383;ucce&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>At the u&#383;ual hour, Jemima brought
+her breakfa&#383;t, and a tender note from
+Darnford. She ran her eye ha&#383;tily over
+it, and her heart calmly hoarded up
+the rapture a fre&#383;h a&#383;&#383;urance of affec<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-130_S" id="APg_1-130_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-130.png">130</a>]</span>tion,
+affection &#383;uch as &#383;he wi&#383;hed to
+in&#383;pire, gave her, without diverting her
+mind a moment from its de&#383;ign. While
+Jemima waited to take away the
+breakfa&#383;t, Maria alluded to the reflections,
+that had haunted her during the
+night to the exclu&#383;ion of &#383;leep. She
+&#383;poke with energy of Jemima's unmerited
+&#383;ufferings, and of the fate of a
+number of de&#383;erted females, placed
+within the &#383;weep of a whirlwind, from
+which it was next to impo&#383;&#383;ible to
+e&#383;cape. Perceiving the effect her conver&#383;ation
+produced on the countenance
+of her guard, &#383;he gra&#383;ped the arm of
+Jemima with that irre&#383;i&#383;tible warmth
+which defies repul&#383;e, exclaiming&mdash;"With
+your heart, and &#383;uch dreadful
+experience, can you lend your aid to
+deprive my babe of a mother's tenderne&#383;s,
+a mother's care? In the name<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-131_S" id="APg_1-131_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-131.png">131</a>]</span>
+of God, a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t me to &#383;natch her from
+de&#383;truction! Let me but give her an
+education&mdash;let me but prepare her
+body and mind to encounter the ills
+which await her &#383;ex, and I will teach
+her to con&#383;ider you as her &#383;econd mother,
+and her&#383;elf as the prop of your
+age. Yes, Jemima, look at me&mdash;ob&#383;erve
+me clo&#383;ely, and read my very &#383;oul;
+you merit a better fate;" &#383;he held out
+her hand with a firm ge&#383;ture of a&#383;&#383;urance;
+"and I will procure it for you,
+as a te&#383;timony of my e&#383;teem, as well as
+of my gratitude."</p>
+
+<p>Jemima had not power to re&#383;i&#383;t this
+per&#383;ua&#383;ive torrent; and, owning that
+the hou&#383;e in which &#383;he was confined,
+was &#383;ituated on the banks of the
+Thames, only a few miles from London,
+and not on the &#383;ea-coa&#383;t, as Darnford
+had &#383;uppo&#383;ed, &#383;he promi&#383;ed to in<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-132_S" id="APg_1-132_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-132.png">132</a>]</span>vent
+&#383;ome excu&#383;e for her ab&#383;ence, and
+go her&#383;elf to trace the &#383;ituation, and
+enquire concerning the health, of this
+abandoned daughter. Her manner
+implied an intention to do &#383;omething
+more, but &#383;he &#383;eemed unwilling to
+impart her de&#383;ign; and Maria, glad to
+have obtained the main point, thought
+it be&#383;t to leave her to the workings of
+her own mind; convinced that &#383;he had
+the power of intere&#383;ting her &#383;till more
+in favour of her&#383;elf and child, by a
+&#383;imple recital of facts.</p>
+
+<p>In the evening, Jemima informed the
+impatient mother, that on the morrow
+&#383;he &#383;hould ha&#383;ten to town before the family
+hour of ri&#383;ing, and received all
+the information nece&#383;&#383;ary, as a clue to
+her &#383;earch. The "Good night!" Maria
+uttered was peculiarly &#383;olemn and
+affectionate. Glad expectation &#383;par<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-133_S" id="APg_1-133_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-133.png">133</a>]</span>kled
+in her eye; and, for the fir&#383;t time
+&#383;ince her detention, &#383;he pronounced
+the name of her child with plea&#383;ureable
+fondne&#383;s; and, with all the garrulity
+of a nur&#383;e, de&#383;cribed her fir&#383;t
+&#383;mile when &#383;he recognized her mother.
+Recollecting her&#383;elf, a &#383;till
+kinder "Adieu!" with a "God
+ble&#383;s you!"&mdash;that &#383;eemed to include
+a maternal benediction, di&#383;mi&#383;&#383;ed
+Jemima.</p>
+
+<p>The dreary &#383;olitude of the en&#383;uing
+day, lengthened by impatiently dwelling
+on the &#383;ame idea, was intolerably
+weari&#383;ome. She li&#383;tened for the &#383;ound
+of a particular clock, which &#383;ome directions
+of the wind allowed her to
+hear di&#383;tinctly. She marked the &#383;hadow
+gaining on the wall; and, twilight
+thickening into darkne&#383;s, her breath
+&#383;eemed oppre&#383;&#383;ed while &#383;he anxiou&#383;ly<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-134_S" id="APg_1-134_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-134.png">134</a>]</span>
+counted nine.&mdash;The la&#383;t &#383;ound was a
+&#383;troke of de&#383;pair on her heart; for &#383;he
+expected every moment, without &#383;eeing
+Jemima, to have her light extingui&#383;hed
+by the &#383;avage female who &#383;upplied
+her place. She was even obliged
+to prepare for bed, re&#383;tle&#383;s as &#383;he was,
+not to di&#383;oblige her new attendant.
+She had been cautioned not to &#383;peak
+too freely to her; but the caution was
+needle&#383;s, her countenance would &#383;till
+more emphatically have made her
+&#383;hrink back. Such was the ferocity of
+manner, con&#383;picuous in every word
+and ge&#383;ture of this hag, that Maria was
+afraid to enquire, why Jemima, who
+had faithfully promi&#383;ed to &#383;ee her before
+her door was &#383;hut for the night, came
+not?&mdash;and, when the key turned in the
+lock, to con&#383;ign her to a night of &#383;u&#383;pence,
+&#383;he felt a degree of angui&#383;h<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-135_S" id="APg_1-135_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-135.png">135</a>]</span>
+which the circum&#383;tances &#383;carcely ju&#383;tified.</p>
+
+<p>Continually on the watch, the &#383;hutting
+of a door, or the &#383;ound of a foot&#383;tep,
+made her &#383;tart and tremble with
+apprehen&#383;ion, &#383;omething like what &#383;he
+felt, when, at her entrance, dragged
+along the gallery, &#383;he began to doubt
+whether &#383;he were not &#383;urrounded by
+demons?</p>
+
+<p>Fatigued by an endle&#383;s rotation of
+thought and wild alarms, &#383;he looked
+like a &#383;pectre, when Jemima entered
+in the morning; e&#383;pecially as her eyes
+darted out of her head, to read in Jemima's
+countenance, almo&#383;t as pallid,
+the intelligence &#383;he dared not tru&#383;t her
+tongue to demand. Jemima put down
+the tea-things, and appeared very bu&#383;y
+in arranging the table. Maria took up
+a cup with trembling hand, then for<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-136_S" id="APg_1-136_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-136.png">136</a>]</span>cibly
+recovering her fortitude, and re&#383;training
+the convul&#383;ive movement
+which agitated the mu&#383;cles of her
+mouth, &#383;he &#383;aid, "Spare your&#383;elf the
+pain of preparing me for your information,
+I adjure you!&mdash;My child is dead!"
+Jemima &#383;olemnly an&#383;wered, "Yes;"
+with a look expre&#383;&#383;ive of compa&#383;&#383;ion
+and angry emotions. "Leave me,"
+added Maria, making a fre&#383;h effort to
+govern her feelings, and hiding her face
+in her handkerchief, to conceal her angui&#383;h&mdash;"It
+is enough&mdash;I know that my
+babe is no more&mdash;I will hear the particulars
+when I am"&mdash;<i>calmer</i>, &#383;he could not
+utter; and Jemima, without importuning
+her by idle attempts to con&#383;ole her,
+left the room.</p>
+
+<p>Plunged in the deepe&#383;t melancholy,
+&#383;he would not admit Darnford's vi&#383;its;
+and &#383;uch is the force of early a&#383;&#383;ocia<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-137_S" id="APg_1-137_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-137.png">137</a>]</span>tions
+even on &#383;trong minds, that, for
+a while, &#383;he indulged the &#383;uper&#383;titious
+notion that &#383;he was ju&#383;tly puni&#383;hed by
+the death of her child, for having for an
+in&#383;tant cea&#383;ed to regret her lo&#383;s. Two
+or three letters from Darnford, full of
+&#383;oothing, manly tenderne&#383;s, only added
+poignancy to the&#383;e accu&#383;ing emotions;
+yet the pa&#383;&#383;ionate &#383;tyle in which he expre&#383;&#383;ed,
+what he termed the fir&#383;t and
+fonde&#383;t wi&#383;h of his heart, "that his affection
+might make her &#383;ome amends
+for the cruelty and inju&#383;tice &#383;he had endured,"
+in&#383;pired a &#383;entiment of gratitude
+to heaven; and her eyes filled
+with delicious tears, when, at the conclu&#383;ion
+of his letter, wi&#383;hing to &#383;upply
+the place of her unworthy relations,
+who&#383;e want of principle he execrated,
+he a&#383;&#383;ured her, calling her his deare&#383;t
+girl, "that it &#383;hould henceforth be the
+bu&#383;ine&#383;s of his life to make her happy."</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-138_S" id="APg_1-138_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-138.png">138</a>]</span>
+He begged, in a note &#383;ent the following
+morning, to be permitted to &#383;ee
+her, when his pre&#383;ence would be no intru&#383;ion
+on her grief; and &#383;o earne&#383;tly
+intreated to be allowed, according to
+promi&#383;e, to beguile the tedious moments
+of ab&#383;ence, by dwelling on the
+events of her pa&#383;t life, that &#383;he &#383;ent him
+the memoirs which had been written
+for her daughter, promi&#383;ing Jemima the
+peru&#383;al as &#383;oon as he returned them.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-139_S" id="APg_1-139_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-139.png">139</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_VII_S" id="ACHAP_VII_S"></a>CHAP. VII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">Addre&#383;&#383;ing</span> the&#383;e memoirs to
+you, my child, uncertain whether I
+&#383;hall ever have an opportunity of in&#383;tructing
+you, many ob&#383;ervations will
+probably flow from my heart, which
+only a mother&mdash;a mother &#383;chooled in
+mi&#383;ery, could make.</p>
+
+<p>"The tenderne&#383;s of a father who knew
+the world, might be great; but could it
+equal that of a mother&mdash;of a mother,
+labouring under a portion of the mi&#383;ery,
+which the con&#383;titution of &#383;ociety &#383;eems
+to have entailed on all her kind? It is,
+my child, my deare&#383;t daughter, only
+&#383;uch a mother, who will dare to break
+through all re&#383;traint to provide for your
+happine&#383;s&mdash;who will voluntarily brave<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-140_S" id="APg_1-140_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-140.png">140</a>]</span>
+cen&#383;ure her&#383;elf, to ward off &#383;orrow from
+your bo&#383;om. From my narrative, my
+dear girl, you may gather the in&#383;truction,
+the coun&#383;el, which is meant rather
+to exerci&#383;e than influence your
+mind.&mdash;Death may &#383;natch me from you,
+before you can weigh my advice, or
+enter into my rea&#383;oning: I would then,
+with fond anxiety, lead you very early
+in life to form your grand principle of
+action, to &#383;ave you from the vain regret
+of having, through irre&#383;olution, let the
+&#383;pring-tide of exi&#383;tence pa&#383;s away, unimproved,
+unenjoyed.&mdash;Gain experience&mdash;ah!
+gain it&mdash;while experience is
+worth having, and acquire &#383;ufficient
+fortitude to pur&#383;ue your own happine&#383;s;
+it includes your utility, by a direct path.
+What is wi&#383;dom too often, but the
+owl of the godde&#383;s, who &#383;its moping
+in a de&#383;olated heart; around me &#383;he<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-141_S" id="APg_1-141_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-141.png">141</a>]</span>
+&#383;hrieks, but I would invite all the gay
+warblers of &#383;pring to ne&#383;tle in your
+blooming bo&#383;om.&mdash;Had I not wa&#383;ted
+years in deliberating, after I cea&#383;ed to
+doubt, how I ought to have acted&mdash;I
+might now be u&#383;eful and happy.&mdash;For
+my &#383;ake, warned by my example, always
+appear what you are, and you
+will not pa&#383;s through exi&#383;tence without
+enjoying its genuine ble&#383;&#383;ings, love and
+re&#383;pect.</p>
+
+<p>"Born in one of the mo&#383;t romantic
+parts of England, an enthu&#383;ia&#383;tic fondne&#383;s
+for the varying charms of nature
+is the fir&#383;t &#383;entiment I recollect; or rather
+it was the fir&#383;t con&#383;ciou&#383;ne&#383;s of
+plea&#383;ure that employed and formed my
+imagination.</p>
+
+<p>"My father had been a captain
+of a man of war; but, di&#383;gu&#383;ted with
+the &#383;ervice, on account of the pre<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-142_S" id="APg_1-142_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-142.png">142</a>]</span>ferment
+of men who&#383;e chief merit was
+their family connections or borough
+intere&#383;t, he retired into the country;
+and, not knowing what to do with
+him&#383;elf&mdash;married. In his family, to
+regain his lo&#383;t con&#383;equence, he determined
+to keep up the &#383;ame pa&#383;&#383;ive obedience,
+as in the ve&#383;&#383;els in which he had
+commanded. His orders were not to be
+di&#383;puted; and the whole hou&#383;e was expected
+to fly, at the word of command,
+as if to man the &#383;hrouds, or mount aloft
+in an elemental &#383;trife, big with life or
+death. He was to be in&#383;tantaneou&#383;ly
+obeyed, e&#383;pecially by my mother, whom
+he very benevolently married for love;
+but took care to remind her of the obligation,
+when &#383;he dared, in the &#383;lighte&#383;t
+in&#383;tance, to que&#383;tion his ab&#383;olute authority.
+My elde&#383;t brother, it is true, as
+he grew up, was treated with more re<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-143_S" id="APg_1-143_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-143.png">143</a>]</span>&#383;pect
+by my father; and became in due
+form the deputy-tyrant of the hou&#383;e.
+The repre&#383;entative of my father, a being
+privileged by nature&mdash;a boy, and
+the darling of my mother, he did not
+fail to act like an heir apparent. Such
+indeed was my mother's extravagant
+partiality, that, in compari&#383;on with her
+affection for him, &#383;he might be &#383;aid not
+to love the re&#383;t of her children. Yet
+none of the children &#383;eemed to have &#383;o
+little affection for her. Extreme indulgence
+had rendered him &#383;o &#383;elfi&#383;h,
+that he only thought of him&#383;elf; and
+from tormenting in&#383;ects and animals, he
+became the de&#383;pot of his brothers, and
+&#383;till more of his &#383;i&#383;ters.</p>
+
+<p>"It is perhaps difficult to give you an
+idea of the petty cares which ob&#383;cured
+the morning of my life; continual re&#383;traint
+in the mo&#383;t trivial matters; un<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-144_S" id="APg_1-144_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-144.png">144</a>]</span>conditional
+&#383;ubmi&#383;&#383;ion to orders, which,
+as a mere child, I &#383;oon di&#383;covered to be
+unrea&#383;onable, becau&#383;e incon&#383;i&#383;tent and
+contradictory. Thus are we de&#383;tined
+to experience a mixture of bitterne&#383;s,
+with the recollection of our mo&#383;t innocent
+enjoyments.</p>
+
+<p>"The circum&#383;tances which, during
+my childhood, occurred to fa&#383;hion my
+mind, were various; yet, as it would
+probably afford me more plea&#383;ure to
+revive the fading remembrance of new-born
+delight, than you, my child, could
+feel in the peru&#383;al, I will not entice
+you to &#383;tray with me into the verdant
+meadow, to &#383;earch for the flowers that
+youthful hopes &#383;catter in every path;
+though, as I write, I almo&#383;t &#383;cent the
+fre&#383;h green of &#383;pring&mdash;of that &#383;pring
+which never returns!</p>
+
+<p>"I had two &#383;i&#383;ters, and one brother,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-145_S" id="APg_1-145_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-145.png">145</a>]</span>
+younger than my&#383;elf; my brother Robert
+was two years older, and might
+truly be termed the idol of his parents,
+and the torment of the re&#383;t of the family.
+Such indeed is the force of prejudice,
+that what was called &#383;pirit and
+wit in him, was cruelly repre&#383;&#383;ed as
+forwardne&#383;s in me.</p>
+
+<p>"My mother had an indolence of
+character, which prevented her from
+paying much attention to our education.
+But the healthy breeze of a
+neighbouring heath, on which we
+bounded at plea&#383;ure, volatilized the
+humours that improper food might
+have generated. And to enjoy open
+air and freedom, was paradi&#383;e, after
+the unnatural re&#383;traint of our fire-&#383;ide,
+where we were often obliged to &#383;it
+three or four hours together, without
+daring to utter a word, when my fa<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-146_S" id="APg_1-146_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-146.png">146</a>]</span>ther
+was out of humour, from want of
+employment, or of a variety of boi&#383;terous
+amu&#383;ement. I had however one
+advantage, an in&#383;tructor, the brother
+of my father, who, intended for the
+church, had of cour&#383;e received a
+liberal education. But, becoming attached
+to a young lady of great beauty
+and large fortune, and acquiring in the
+world &#383;ome opinions not con&#383;onant
+with the profe&#383;&#383;ion for which he was
+de&#383;igned, he accepted, with the mo&#383;t
+&#383;anguine expectations of &#383;ucce&#383;s, the
+offer of a nobleman to accompany him
+to India, as his confidential &#383;ecretary.</p>
+
+<p>"A corre&#383;pondence was regularly
+kept up with the object of his affection;
+and the intricacies of bu&#383;ine&#383;s, peculiarly
+weari&#383;ome to a man of a romantic
+turn of mind, contributed, with a forced
+ab&#383;ence, to increa&#383;e his attachment.<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-147_S" id="APg_1-147_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-147.png">147</a>]</span>
+Every other pa&#383;&#383;ion was lo&#383;t in this
+ma&#383;ter-one, and only &#383;erved to &#383;well the
+torrent. Her relations, &#383;uch were his
+waking dreams, who had de&#383;pi&#383;ed him,
+would court in their turn his alliance,
+and all the blandi&#383;hments of ta&#383;te would
+grace the triumph of love.&mdash;While he
+ba&#383;ked in the warm &#383;un&#383;hine of love,
+friend&#383;hip al&#383;o promi&#383;ed to &#383;hed its
+dewy fre&#383;hne&#383;s; for a friend, whom he
+loved next to his mi&#383;tre&#383;s, was the confident,
+who forwarded the letters from
+one to the other, to elude the ob&#383;ervation
+of prying relations. A friend fal&#383;e
+in &#383;imilar circum&#383;tances, is, my deare&#383;t
+girl, an old tale; yet, let not this example,
+or the frigid caution of cold-blooded
+morali&#383;ts, make you endeavour
+to &#383;tifle hopes, which are the buds that
+naturally unfold them&#383;elves during the
+&#383;pring of life! Whil&#383;t your own heart<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-148_S" id="APg_1-148_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+is &#383;incere, always expect to meet one
+glowing with the &#383;ame &#383;entiments; for
+to fly from plea&#383;ure, is not to avoid
+pain!</p>
+
+<p>"My uncle realized, by good luck,
+rather than management, a hand&#383;ome
+fortune; and returning on the wings of
+love, lo&#383;t in the mo&#383;t enchanting reveries,
+to England, to &#383;hare it with his
+mi&#383;tre&#383;s and his friend, he found them&mdash;united.</p>
+
+<p>"There were &#383;ome circum&#383;tances, not
+nece&#383;&#383;ary for me to recite, which aggravated
+the guilt of the friend beyond mea&#383;ure,
+and the deception, that had been carried
+on to the la&#383;t moment, was &#383;o ba&#383;e,
+it produced the mo&#383;t violent effect on
+my uncle's health and &#383;pirits. His native
+country, the world! lately a garden of
+blooming &#383;weets, bla&#383;ted by treachery,
+&#383;eemed changed into a parched de&#383;ert,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-149_S" id="APg_1-149_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+the abode of hi&#383;&#383;ing &#383;erpents. Di&#383;appointment
+rankled in his heart; and,
+brooding over his wrongs, he was attacked
+by a raging fever, followed by
+a derangement of mind, which only
+gave place to habitual melancholy, as
+he recovered more &#383;trength of body.</p>
+
+<p>"Declaring an intention never to
+marry, his relations were ever clu&#383;tering
+about him, paying the gro&#383;&#383;e&#383;t adulation
+to a man, who, di&#383;gu&#383;ted with
+mankind, received them with &#383;corn, or
+bitter &#383;arca&#383;ms. Something in my
+countenance plea&#383;ed him, when I began
+to prattle. Since his return, he appeared
+dead to affection; but I &#383;oon,
+by &#383;howing him innocent fondne&#383;s, became
+a favourite; and endeavouring
+to enlarge and &#383;trengthen my mind, I
+grew dear to him in proportion as I imbibed
+his &#383;entiments. He had a forcible<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-150_S" id="APg_1-150_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+manner of &#383;peaking, rendered more
+&#383;o by a certain impre&#383;&#383;ive wildne&#383;s of
+look and ge&#383;ture, calculated to engage
+the attention of a young and ardent
+mind. It is not then &#383;urpri&#383;ing that I
+quickly adopted his opinions in preference,
+and reverenced him as one of
+a &#383;uperior order of beings. He inculcated,
+with great warmth, &#383;elf-re&#383;pect,
+and a lofty con&#383;ciou&#383;ne&#383;s of acting
+right, independent of the cen&#383;ure or
+applau&#383;e of the world; nay, he almo&#383;t
+taught me to brave, and even de&#383;pi&#383;e
+its cen&#383;ure, when convinced of the rectitude
+of my own intentions.</p>
+
+<p>"Endeavouring to prove to me that
+nothing which de&#383;erved the name of
+love or friend&#383;hip, exi&#383;ted in the world,
+he drew &#383;uch animated pictures of his
+own feelings, rendered permanent by
+di&#383;appointment, as imprinted the &#383;en<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-151_S" id="APg_1-151_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-151.png">151</a>]</span>timents
+&#383;trongly on my heart, and animated
+my imagination. The&#383;e remarks
+are nece&#383;&#383;ary to elucidate &#383;ome peculiarities
+in my character, which by the
+world are indefinitely termed romantic.</p>
+
+<p>"My uncle's increa&#383;ing affection led
+him to vi&#383;it me often. Still, unable to
+re&#383;t in any place, he did not remain
+long in the country to &#383;often dome&#383;tic
+tyranny; but he brought me books, for
+which I had a pa&#383;&#383;ion, and they con&#383;pired
+with his conver&#383;ation, to make
+me form an ideal picture of life. I &#383;hall
+pa&#383;s over the tyranny of my father,
+much as I &#383;uffered from it; but it is
+nece&#383;&#383;ary to notice, that it undermined
+my mother's health; and that
+her temper, continually irritated by
+dome&#383;tic bickering, became intolerably
+peevi&#383;h.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-152_S" id="APg_1-152_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-152.png">152</a>]</span>
+"My elde&#383;t brother was articled to a
+neighbouring attorney, the &#383;hrewde&#383;t,
+and, I may add, the mo&#383;t unprincipled
+man in that part of the country. As
+my brother generally came home every
+Saturday, to a&#383;toni&#383;h my mother by
+exhibiting his attainments, he gradually
+a&#383;&#383;umed a right of directing the
+whole family, not excepting my father.
+He &#383;eemed to take a peculiar plea&#383;ure
+in tormenting and humbling me; and
+if I ever ventured to complain of this
+treatment to either my father or mother,
+I was rudely rebuffed for pre&#383;uming
+to judge of the conduct of my elde&#383;t
+brother.</p>
+
+<p>"About this period a merchant's
+family came to &#383;ettle in our neighbourhood.
+A man&#383;ion-hou&#383;e in the village,
+lately purcha&#383;ed, had been preparing
+the whole &#383;pring, and the &#383;ight of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-153_S" id="APg_1-153_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-153.png">153</a>]</span>
+co&#383;tly furniture, &#383;ent from London, had
+excited my mother's envy, and rou&#383;ed
+my father's pride. My &#383;en&#383;ations were
+very different, and all of a plea&#383;urable
+kind. I longed to &#383;ee new characters,
+to break the tedious monotony of my
+life; and to find a friend, &#383;uch as fancy
+had pourtrayed. I cannot then de&#383;cribe
+the emotion I felt, the Sunday they
+made their appearance at church. My
+eyes were rivetted on the pillar round
+which I expected fir&#383;t to catch a glimp&#383;e
+of them, and darted forth to meet a
+&#383;ervant who ha&#383;tily preceded a group
+of ladies, who&#383;e white robes and waving
+plumes, &#383;eemed to &#383;tream along the
+gloomy ai&#383;le, diffu&#383;ing the light, by
+which I contemplated their figures.</p>
+
+<p>"We vi&#383;ited them in form; and I
+quickly &#383;elected the elde&#383;t daughter for
+my friend. The &#383;econd &#383;on, George,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-154_S" id="APg_1-154_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+paid me particular attention, and finding
+his attainments and manners &#383;uperior
+to tho&#383;e of the young men of the
+village, I began to imagine him &#383;uperior
+to the re&#383;t of mankind. Had my home
+been more comfortable, or my previous
+acquaintance more numerous, I &#383;hould
+not probably have been &#383;o eager to
+open my heart to new affections.</p>
+
+<p>"Mr. Venables, the merchant, had
+acquired a large fortune by unremitting
+attention to bu&#383;ine&#383;s; but his health declining
+rapidly, he was obliged to retire,
+before his &#383;on, George, had acquired
+&#383;ufficient experience, to enable
+him to conduct their affairs on the &#383;ame
+prudential plan, his father had invariably
+pur&#383;ued. Indeed, he had laboured
+to throw off his authority,
+having de&#383;pi&#383;ed his narrow plans and
+cautious &#383;peculation. The elde&#383;t &#383;on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-155_S" id="APg_1-155_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-155.png">155</a>]</span>
+could not be prevailed on to enter the
+firm; and, to oblige his wife, and have
+peace in the hou&#383;e, Mr. Venables had
+purcha&#383;ed a commi&#383;&#383;ion for him in the
+guards.</p>
+
+<p>"I am now alluding to circum&#383;tances
+which came to my knowledge long
+after; but it is nece&#383;&#383;ary, my deare&#383;t
+child, that you &#383;hould know the character
+of your father, to prevent your
+de&#383;pi&#383;ing your mother; the only parent
+inclined to di&#383;charge a parent's duty.
+In London, George had acquired habits
+of libertini&#383;m, which he carefully concealed
+from his father and his commercial
+connections. The ma&#383;k he
+wore, was &#383;o complete a covering of
+his real vi&#383;age, that the prai&#383;e his father
+lavi&#383;hed on his conduct, and, poor
+mi&#383;taken man! on his principles, contra&#383;ted
+with his brother's, rendered the<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-156_S" id="APg_1-156_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-156.png">156</a>]</span>
+notice he took of me peculiarly flattering.
+Without any fixed de&#383;ign, as I
+am now convinced, he continued to
+&#383;ingle me out at the dance, pre&#383;s my
+hand at parting, and utter expre&#383;&#383;ions
+of unmeaning pa&#383;&#383;ion, to which I gave
+a meaning naturally &#383;ugge&#383;ted by the
+romantic turn of my thoughts. His
+&#383;tay in the country was &#383;hort; his manners
+did not entirely plea&#383;e me; but,
+when he left us, the colouring of my
+picture became more vivid&mdash;Whither
+did not my imagination lead me? In
+&#383;hort, I fancied my&#383;elf in love&mdash;in love
+with the di&#383;intere&#383;tedne&#383;s, fortitude,
+genero&#383;ity, dignity, and humanity, with
+which I had inve&#383;ted the hero I dubbed.
+A circum&#383;tance which &#383;oon after
+occurred, rendered all the&#383;e virtues
+palpable. [The incident is perhaps
+worth relating on other accounts, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-157_S" id="APg_1-157_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-157.png">157</a>]</span>
+therefore I &#383;hall de&#383;cribe it di&#383;tinctly.]</p>
+
+<p>"I had a great affection for my nur&#383;e,
+old Mary, for whom I u&#383;ed often to
+work, to &#383;pare her eyes. Mary had a
+younger &#383;i&#383;ter, married to a &#383;ailor, while
+&#383;he was &#383;uckling me; for my mother
+only &#383;uckled my elde&#383;t brother, which
+might be the cau&#383;e of her extraordinary
+partiality. Peggy, Mary's &#383;i&#383;ter, lived
+with her, till her hu&#383;band, becoming a
+mate in a We&#383;t-India trader, got a little
+before-hand in the world. He
+wrote to his wife from the fir&#383;t port in
+the Channel, after his mo&#383;t &#383;ucce&#383;&#383;ful
+voyage, to reque&#383;t her to come to
+London to meet him; he even wi&#383;hed
+her to determine on living there for the
+future, to &#383;ave him the trouble of coming
+to her the moment he came on
+&#383;hore; and to turn a penny by keeping<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-158_S" id="APg_1-158_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-158.png">158</a>]</span>
+a green-&#383;tall. It was too much to &#383;et out
+on a journey the moment he had fini&#383;hed
+a voyage, and fifty miles by land, was
+wor&#383;e than a thou&#383;and leagues by &#383;ea.</p>
+
+<p>"She packed up her alls, and came to
+London&mdash;but did not meet hone&#383;t Daniel.
+A common mi&#383;fortune prevented
+her, and the poor are bound to &#383;uffer
+for the good of their country&mdash;he was
+pre&#383;&#383;ed in the river&mdash;and never came on
+&#383;hore.</p>
+
+<p>"Peggy was mi&#383;erable in London,
+not knowing, as &#383;he &#383;aid, 'the face of
+any living &#383;oul.' Be&#383;ides, her imagination
+had been employed, anticipating
+a month or &#383;ix weeks' happine&#383;s with
+her hu&#383;band. Daniel was to have gone
+with her to Sadler's Wells, and We&#383;tmin&#383;ter
+Abbey, and to many &#383;ights,
+which he knew &#383;he never heard of in
+the country. Peggy too was thrifty,<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-159_S" id="APg_1-159_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-159.png">159</a>]</span>
+and how could &#383;he manage to put his
+plan in execution alone? He had acquaintance;
+but &#383;he did not know the
+very name of their places of abode.
+His letters were made up of&mdash;How do
+you does, and God ble&#383;s yous,&mdash;information
+was re&#383;erved for the hour of
+meeting.</p>
+
+<p>"She too had her portion of information,
+near at heart. Molly and Jacky
+were grown &#383;uch little darlings, &#383;he
+was almo&#383;t angry that daddy did not
+&#383;ee their tricks. She had not half the
+plea&#383;ure &#383;he &#383;hould have had from their
+prattle, could &#383;he have recounted to
+him each night the pretty &#383;peeches of
+the day. Some &#383;tories, however, were
+&#383;tored up&mdash;and Jacky could &#383;ay papa
+with &#383;uch a &#383;weet voice, it mu&#383;t delight
+his heart. Yet when &#383;he came, and
+found no Daniel to greet her, when<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-160_S" id="APg_1-160_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-160.png">160</a>]</span>
+Jacky called papa, &#383;he wept, bidding
+'God ble&#383;s his innocent &#383;oul, that
+did not know what &#383;orrow was.'&mdash;But
+more &#383;orrow was in &#383;tore for Peggy,
+innocent as &#383;he was.&mdash;Daniel was killed
+in the fir&#383;t engagement, and then
+the <i>papa</i> was agony, &#383;ounding to the
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>"She had lived &#383;paringly on his wages,
+while there was any hope of his return;
+but, that gone, &#383;he returned with a
+breaking heart to the country, to a
+little market town, nearly three miles
+from our village. She did not like to
+go to &#383;ervice, to be &#383;nubbed about,
+after being her own mi&#383;tre&#383;s. To put
+her children out to nur&#383;e was impo&#383;&#383;ible:
+how far would her wages go? and
+to &#383;end them to her hu&#383;band's pari&#383;h, a
+di&#383;tant one, was to lo&#383;e her hu&#383;band
+twice over.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-161_S" id="APg_1-161_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-161.png">161</a>]</span>
+"I had heard all from Mary, and
+made my uncle furni&#383;h a little cottage
+for her, to enable her to &#383;ell&mdash;&#383;o &#383;acred
+was poor Daniel's advice, now he was
+dead and gone&mdash;a little fruit, toys and
+cakes. The minding of the &#383;hop did
+not require her whole time, nor even
+the keeping her children clean, and
+&#383;he loved to &#383;ee them clean; &#383;o &#383;he took
+in wa&#383;hing, and altogether made a &#383;hift
+to earn bread for her children, &#383;till
+weeping for Daniel, when Jacky's arch
+looks made her think of his father.&mdash;It
+was plea&#383;ant to work for her children.&mdash;'Yes;
+from morning till night,
+could &#383;he have had a ki&#383;s from their
+father, God re&#383;t his &#383;oul! Yes; had
+it <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'pla&#383;ed'">plea&#383;ed</ins> Providence to have let him
+come back without a leg or an arm, it
+would have been the &#383;ame thing to her&mdash;for
+&#383;he did not love him becau&#383;e he<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-162_S" id="APg_1-162_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-162.png">162</a>]</span>
+maintained them&mdash;no; &#383;he had hands
+of her own.'</p>
+
+<p>"The country people were hone&#383;t,
+and Peggy left her linen out to dry
+very late. A recruiting party, as &#383;he
+&#383;uppo&#383;ed, pa&#383;&#383;ing through, made free
+with a large wa&#383;h; for it was all &#383;wept
+away, including her own and her children's
+little &#383;tock.</p>
+
+<p>"This was a dreadful blow; two dozen
+of &#383;hirts, &#383;tocks and handkerchiefs.
+She gave the money which &#383;he
+had laid by for half a year's rent, and
+promi&#383;ed to pay two &#383;hillings a week
+till all was cleared; &#383;o &#383;he did not lo&#383;e
+her employment. This two &#383;hillings a
+week, and the buying a few nece&#383;&#383;aries
+for the children, drove her &#383;o hard,
+that &#383;he had not a penny to pay her rent
+with, when a twelvemonth's became
+due.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-163_S" id="APg_1-163_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+"She was now with Mary, and had
+ju&#383;t told her tale, which Mary in&#383;tantly
+repeated&mdash;it was intended for my
+ear. Many hou&#383;es in this town, producing
+a borough-intere&#383;t, were included
+in the e&#383;tate purcha&#383;ed by Mr.
+Venables, and the attorney with whom
+my brother lived, was appointed his
+agent, to collect and rai&#383;e the rents.</p>
+
+<p>"He demanded Peggy's, and, in
+&#383;pite of her intreaties, her poor goods
+had been &#383;eized and &#383;old. So that &#383;he
+had not, and what was wor&#383;e her children,
+'for &#383;he had known &#383;orrow
+enough,' a bed to lie on. She knew
+that I was good-natured&mdash;right charitable,
+yet not liking to a&#383;k for more
+than needs mu&#383;t, &#383;he &#383;corned to petition
+while people could any how be
+made to wait. But now, &#383;hould &#383;he
+be turned out of doors, &#383;he mu&#383;t ex<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-164_S" id="APg_1-164_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-164.png">164</a>]</span>pect
+nothing le&#383;s than to lo&#383;e all her
+cu&#383;tomers, and then &#383;he mu&#383;t beg or
+&#383;tarve&mdash;and what would become of her
+children?&mdash;'had Daniel not been
+pre&#383;&#383;ed&mdash;but God knows be&#383;t&mdash;all this
+could not have happened.'</p>
+
+<p>"I had two mattra&#383;&#383;es on my bed;
+what did I want with two, when
+&#383;uch a worthy creature mu&#383;t lie on the
+ground? My mother would be angry,
+but I could conceal it till my uncle
+came down; and then I would tell him
+all the whole truth, and if he ab&#383;olved
+me, heaven would.</p>
+
+<p>"I begged the hou&#383;e-maid to come
+up &#383;tairs with me (&#383;ervants always feel
+for the di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;es of poverty, and &#383;o
+would the rich if they knew what it
+was). She a&#383;&#383;i&#383;ted me to tie up the
+mattra&#383;s; I di&#383;covering, at the &#383;ame
+time, that one blanket would &#383;erve me<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-165_S" id="APg_1-165_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+till winter, could I per&#383;uade my &#383;i&#383;ter,
+who &#383;lept with me, to keep my &#383;ecret.
+She entering in the mid&#383;t of the package,
+I gave her &#383;ome new feathers, to
+&#383;ilence her. We got the mattra&#383;s
+down the back &#383;tairs, unperceived,
+and I helped to carry it, taking with
+me all the money I had, and what I
+could borrow from my &#383;i&#383;ter.</p>
+
+<p>"When I got to the cottage, Peggy
+declared that &#383;he would not take what
+I had brought &#383;ecretly; but, when,
+with all the eager eloquence in&#383;pired
+by a decided purpo&#383;e, I gra&#383;ped her
+hand with weeping eyes, a&#383;&#383;uring her
+that my uncle would &#383;creen me from
+blame, when he was once more in the
+country, de&#383;cribing, at the &#383;ame time,
+what &#383;he would &#383;uffer in parting with
+her children, after keeping them &#383;o
+long from being thrown on the pari&#383;h,
+&#383;he reluctantly con&#383;ented.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-166_S" id="APg_1-166_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-166.png">166</a>]</span>
+"My project of u&#383;efulne&#383;s ended not
+here; I determined to &#383;peak to the
+attorney; he frequently paid me compliments.
+His character did not intimidate
+me; but, imagining that Peggy
+mu&#383;t be mi&#383;taken, and that no man
+could turn a deaf ear to &#383;uch a tale of
+complicated di&#383;tre&#383;s, I determined to
+walk to the town with Mary the next
+morning, and reque&#383;t him to wait for
+the rent, and keep my &#383;ecret, till my
+uncle's return.</p>
+
+<p>"My repo&#383;e was &#383;weet; and, waking
+with the fir&#383;t dawn of day, I bounded
+to Mary's cottage. What charms do
+not a light heart &#383;pread over nature!
+Every bird that twittered in a bu&#383;h,
+every flower that enlivened the hedge,
+&#383;eemed placed there to awaken me to
+rapture&mdash;yes; to rapture. The pre&#383;ent
+moment was full fraught with happi<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-167_S" id="APg_1-167_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-167.png">167</a>]</span>ne&#383;s;
+and on futurity I be&#383;towed not a
+thought, excepting to anticipate my
+&#383;ucce&#383;s with the attorney.</p>
+
+<p>"This man of the world, with ro&#383;y
+face and &#383;impering features, received
+me politely, nay kindly; li&#383;tened with
+complacency to my remon&#383;trances,
+though he &#383;carcely heeded Mary's tears.
+I did not then &#383;u&#383;pect, that my eloquence
+was in my complexion, the
+blu&#383;h of &#383;eventeen, or that, in a world
+where humanity to women is the characteri&#383;tic
+of advancing civilization, the
+beauty of a young girl was &#383;o much
+more intere&#383;ting than the di&#383;tre&#383;s of an
+old one. Pre&#383;&#383;ing my hand, he promi&#383;ed
+to let Peggy remain in the hou&#383;e
+as long as I wi&#383;hed.&mdash;I more than returned
+the pre&#383;&#383;ure&mdash;I was &#383;o grateful
+and &#383;o happy. Emboldened by my innocent
+warmth, he then ki&#383;&#383;ed me<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-168_S" id="APg_1-168_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-168.png">168</a>]</span>&mdash;and
+I did not draw back&mdash;I took it for
+a ki&#383;s of charity.</p>
+
+<p>"Gay as a lark, I went to dine at Mr.
+Venables'. I had previou&#383;ly obtained
+five &#383;hillings from my father, towards
+re-clothing the poor children of my
+care, and prevailed on my mother to
+take one of the girls into the hou&#383;e, whom
+I determined to teach to work and read.</p>
+
+<p>"After dinner, when the younger part
+of the circle retired to the mu&#383;ic room,
+I recounted with energy my tale; that
+is, I mentioned Peggy's di&#383;tre&#383;s, without
+hinting at the &#383;teps I had taken to
+relieve her. Mi&#383;s Venables gave me
+half-a-crown; the heir five &#383;hillings;
+but George &#383;at unmoved. I was cruelly
+di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ed by the di&#383;appointment&mdash;I
+&#383;carcely could remain on my chair;
+and, could I have got out of the room
+unperceived, I &#383;hould have flown home,
+as if to run away from my&#383;elf. After<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-169_S" id="APg_1-169_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-169.png">169</a>]</span>
+&#383;everal vain attempts to ri&#383;e, I leaned
+my head again&#383;t the marble chimney-piece,
+and gazing on the evergreens
+that filled the fire-place, moralized on
+the vanity of human expectations; regardle&#383;s
+of the company. I was rou&#383;ed
+by a gentle tap on my &#383;houlder from
+behind Charlotte's chair. I turned
+my head, and George &#383;lid a guinea into
+my hand, putting his finger to his
+mouth, to enjoin me &#383;ilence.</p>
+
+<p>"What a revolution took place, not
+only in my train of thoughts, but feelings!
+I trembled with emotion&mdash;now,
+indeed, I was in love. Such delicacy
+too, to enhance his benevolence! I felt
+in my pocket every five minutes, only
+to feel the guinea; and its magic touch
+inve&#383;ted my hero with more than mortal
+beauty. My fancy had found a ba&#383;is
+to erect its model of perfection on;<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-170_S" id="APg_1-170_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-170.png">170</a>]</span>
+and quickly went to work, with all the
+happy credulity of youth, to con&#383;ider
+that heart as devoted to virtue, which
+had only obeyed a virtuous impul&#383;e.
+The bitter experience was yet to come,
+that has taught me how very di&#383;tinct
+are the principles of virtue, from the
+ca&#383;ual feelings from which they germinate.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-171_S" id="APg_1-171_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-171.png">171</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="ACHAP_VIII_S" id="ACHAP_VIII_S"></a>CHAP. VIII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">I have</span> perhaps dwelt too long on
+a circum&#383;tance, which is only of importance
+as it marks the progre&#383;s of a
+deception that has been &#383;o fatal to my
+peace; and introduces to your notice a
+poor girl, whom, intending to &#383;erve, I led
+to ruin. Still it is probable that I was
+not entirely the victim of mi&#383;take; and
+that your father, gradually fa&#383;hioned
+by the world, did not quickly become
+what I he&#383;itate to call him&mdash;out of
+re&#383;pect to my daughter.</p>
+
+<p>"But, to ha&#383;ten to the more bu&#383;y
+&#383;cenes of my life. Mr. Venables and
+my mother died the &#383;ame &#383;ummer;
+and, wholly engro&#383;&#383;ed by my attention
+to her, I thought of little el&#383;e.
+The neglect of her darling, my brother
+Robert, had a violent effect on<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-172_S" id="APg_1-172_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-172.png">172</a>]</span>
+her weakened mind; for, though boys
+may be reckoned the pillars of the
+hou&#383;e without doors, girls are often the
+only comfort within. They but too frequently
+wa&#383;te their health and &#383;pirits
+attending a dying parent, who leaves
+them in comparative poverty. After
+clo&#383;ing, with filial piety, a father's
+eyes, they are cha&#383;ed from the paternal
+roof, to make room for the fir&#383;t-born,
+the &#383;on, who is to carry the
+empty family-name down to po&#383;terity;
+though, occupied with his own plea&#383;ures,
+he &#383;carcely thought of di&#383;charging,
+in the decline of his parent's life,
+the debt contracted in his childhood.
+My mother's conduct led me to make
+the&#383;e reflections. Great as was the fatigue
+I endured, and the affection my
+uncea&#383;ing &#383;olicitude evinced, of which
+my mother &#383;eemed perfectly &#383;en&#383;ible,
+&#383;till, when my brother, whom I could<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-173_S" id="APg_1-173_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-173.png">173</a>]</span>
+hardly per&#383;uade to remain a quarter of
+an hour in her chamber, was with her
+alone, a &#383;hort time before her death,
+&#383;he gave him a little hoard, which &#383;he
+had been &#383;ome years accumulating.</p>
+
+<p>"During my mother's illne&#383;s, I was
+obliged to manage my father's temper,
+who, from the lingering nature of her
+malady, began to imagine that it was
+merely fancy. At this period, an artful
+kind of upper &#383;ervant attracted my
+father's attention, and the neighbours
+made many remarks on the finery, not
+hone&#383;tly got, exhibited at evening &#383;ervice.
+But I was too much occupied
+with my mother to ob&#383;erve any change
+in her dre&#383;s or behaviour, or to li&#383;ten to
+the whi&#383;per of &#383;candal.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;hall not dwell on the death-bed
+&#383;cene, lively as is the remembrance,
+or on the emotion produced by the la&#383;t<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-174_S" id="APg_1-174_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-174.png">174</a>]</span>
+gra&#383;p of my mother's cold hand; when
+ble&#383;&#383;ing me, &#383;he added, 'A little patience,
+and all will be over!' Ah!
+my child, how often have tho&#383;e words
+rung mournfully in my ears&mdash;and I
+have exclaimed&mdash;'A little more patience,
+and I too &#383;hall be at re&#383;t!'</p>
+
+<p>"My father was violently affected
+by her death, recollected in&#383;tances of
+his unkindne&#383;s, and wept like a child.</p>
+
+<p>"My mother had &#383;olemnly recommended
+my &#383;i&#383;ters to my care, and bid
+me be a mother to them. They, indeed,
+became more dear to me as they
+became more forlorn; for, during my
+mother's illne&#383;s, I di&#383;covered the ruined
+&#383;tate of my father's circum&#383;tances,
+and that he had only been able to keep
+up appearances, by the &#383;ums which he
+borrowed of my uncle.</p>
+
+<p>"My father's grief, and con&#383;equent<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-175_S" id="APg_1-175_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-175.png">175</a>]</span>
+tenderne&#383;s to his children, quickly
+abated, the hou&#383;e grew &#383;till more
+gloomy or riotous; and my refuge
+from care was again at Mr. Venables';
+the young '&#383;quire having taken his father's
+place, and allowing, for the pre&#383;ent,
+his &#383;i&#383;ter to pre&#383;ide at his table.
+George, though di&#383;&#383;ati&#383;fied with his
+portion of the fortune, which had till
+lately been all in trade, vi&#383;ited the family
+as u&#383;ual. He was now full of &#383;peculations
+in trade, and his brow became
+clouded by care. He &#383;eemed to relax
+in his attention to me, when the pre&#383;ence
+of my uncle gave a new turn to
+his behaviour. I was too un&#383;u&#383;pecting,
+too di&#383;intere&#383;ted, to trace the&#383;e changes
+to their &#383;ource.</p>
+
+<p>My home every day became more
+and more di&#383;agreeable to me; my liberty
+was unnece&#383;&#383;arily abridged, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-176_S" id="APg_1-176_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-176.png">176</a>]</span>
+my books, on the pretext that they made
+me idle, taken from me. My father's
+mi&#383;tre&#383;s was with child, and he, doating
+on her, allowed or overlooked her
+vulgar manner of tyrannizing over us.
+I was indignant, e&#383;pecially when I &#383;aw
+her endeavouring to attract, &#383;hall I
+&#383;ay &#383;educe? my younger brother. By
+allowing women but one way of ri&#383;ing
+in the world, the fo&#383;tering the libertini&#383;m
+of men, &#383;ociety makes mon&#383;ters
+of them, and then their ignoble
+vices are brought forward as a proof of
+inferiority of intellect.</p>
+
+<p>The weari&#383;omene&#383;s of my &#383;ituation
+can &#383;carcely be de&#383;cribed. Though my
+life had not pa&#383;&#383;ed in the mo&#383;t even tenour
+with my mother, it was paradi&#383;e
+to that I was de&#383;tined to endure with
+my father's mi&#383;tre&#383;s, jealous of her illegitimate
+authority. My father's former<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-177_S" id="APg_1-177_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-177.png">177</a>]</span>
+occa&#383;ional tenderne&#383;s, in &#383;pite of his
+violence of temper, had been &#383;oothing
+to me; but now he only met me with
+reproofs or portentous frowns. The
+hou&#383;e-keeper, as &#383;he was now termed,
+was the vulgar de&#383;pot of the family;
+and a&#383;&#383;uming the new character of a
+fine lady, &#383;he could never forgive the
+contempt which was &#383;ometimes vi&#383;ible
+in my countenance, when &#383;he uttered
+with pompo&#383;ity her bad Engli&#383;h, or
+affected to be well bred.</p>
+
+<p>To my uncle I ventured to open my
+heart; and he, with his wonted benevolence,
+began to con&#383;ider in what
+manner he could extricate me out of
+my pre&#383;ent irk&#383;ome &#383;ituation. In &#383;pite
+of his own di&#383;appointment, or, mo&#383;t
+probably, actuated by the feelings that
+had been petrified, not cooled, in all
+their &#383;anguine fervour, like a boiling
+torrent of lava &#383;uddenly da&#383;hing into<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-178_S" id="APg_1-178_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-178.png">178</a>]</span>
+the &#383;ea, he thought a marriage of mutual
+inclination (would envious &#383;tars
+permit it) the only chance for happine&#383;s
+in this di&#383;a&#383;trous world. George
+Venables had the reputation of being
+attentive to bu&#383;ine&#383;s, and my father's
+example gave great weight to this circum&#383;tance;
+for habits of order in bu&#383;ine&#383;s
+would, he conceived, extend to
+the regulation of the affections in dome&#383;tic
+life. George &#383;eldom &#383;poke in
+my uncle's company, except to utter a
+&#383;hort, judicious que&#383;tion, or to make a
+pertinent remark, with all due deference
+to his &#383;uperior judgment; &#383;o that
+my uncle &#383;eldom left his company without
+ob&#383;erving, that the young man had
+more in him than people &#383;uppo&#383;ed.</p>
+
+<p>In this opinion he was not &#383;ingular;
+yet, believe me, and I am not &#383;wayed
+by re&#383;entment, the&#383;e &#383;peeches &#383;o ju&#383;tly<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-179_S" id="APg_1-179_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-179.png">179</a>]</span>
+poized, this &#383;ilent deference, when the
+animal &#383;pirits of other young people
+were throwing off youthful ebullitions,
+were not the effect of thought or humility,
+but &#383;heer barrenne&#383;s of mind,
+and want of imagination. A colt of
+mettle will curvet and &#383;hew his paces.
+Yes; my dear girl, the&#383;e prudent
+young men want all the fire nece&#383;&#383;ary
+to ferment their faculties, and are characterized
+as wi&#383;e, only becau&#383;e they
+are not fooli&#383;h. It is true, that George
+was by no means &#383;o great a favourite
+of mine as during the fir&#383;t year of our
+acquaintance; &#383;till, as he often coincided
+in opinion with me, and echoed
+my &#383;entiments; and having my&#383;elf no
+other attachment, I heard with plea&#383;ure
+my uncle's propo&#383;al; but thought
+more of obtaining my freedom, than
+of my lover. But, when George, &#383;eem<span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-180_S" id="APg_1-180_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-180.png">180</a>]</span>ingly
+anxious for my happine&#383;s, pre&#383;&#383;ed
+me to quit my pre&#383;ent painful &#383;ituation,
+my heart &#383;welled with gratitude&mdash;I
+knew not that my uncle had promi&#383;ed
+him five thou&#383;and pounds.</p>
+
+<p>Had this truly generous man mentioned
+his intention to me, I &#383;hould have in&#383;i&#383;ted
+on a thou&#383;and pounds being &#383;ettled
+on each of my &#383;i&#383;ters; George would
+have conte&#383;ted; I &#383;hould have &#383;een his
+&#383;elfi&#383;h &#383;oul; and&mdash;gracious God! have
+been &#383;pared the mi&#383;ery of di&#383;covering,
+when too late, that I was united to a
+heartle&#383;s, unprincipled wretch. All
+my &#383;chemes of u&#383;efulne&#383;s would not
+then have been bla&#383;ted. The tenderne&#383;s
+of my heart would not have heated
+my imagination with vi&#383;ions of the
+ineffable delight of happy love; nor
+would the &#383;weet duty of a mother have
+been &#383;o cruelly interrupted.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="APg_1-181_S" id="APg_1-181_S"></a>[<a href="images/v1-181.png">181</a>]</span>
+But I mu&#383;t not &#383;uffer the fortitude
+I have &#383;o hardly acquired, to be undermined
+by unavailing regret. Let me
+ha&#383;ten forward to de&#383;cribe the turbid
+&#383;tream in which I had to wade&mdash;but
+let me exultingly declare that it is
+pa&#383;&#383;ed&mdash;my &#383;oul holds fellow&#383;hip with
+him no more. He cut the Gordian
+knot, which my principles, mi&#383;taken
+ones, re&#383;pected; he di&#383;&#383;olved the tie, the
+fetters rather, that ate into my very
+vitals&mdash;and I &#383;hould rejoice, con&#383;cious
+that my mind is freed, though confined
+in hell it&#383;elf; the only place that even
+fancy can imagine more dreadful than
+my pre&#383;ent abode.</p>
+
+<p>The&#383;e varying emotions will not allow
+me to proceed. I heave &#383;igh after
+&#383;igh; yet my heart is &#383;till oppre&#383;&#383;ed.
+For what am I re&#383;erved? Why was I not
+born a man, or why was I born at all?</p>
+
+
+<h4>END OF VOL. I.</h4>
+
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-i" id="BPg_2-i"></a>[<a href="images/v2-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="V2" id="V2"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>VOL. II.</h2>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-ii" id="BPg_2-ii"></a>[<a href="images/v2-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-iii" id="BPg_2-iii"></a>[<a href="images/v2-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. II.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-iv" id="BPg_2-iv"></a>[<a href="images/v2-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-v" id="BPg_2-v"></a>[<a href="images/v2-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>THE</h3>
+
+<h1>WRONGS OF WOMAN:</h1>
+
+<h3>OR,</h3>
+
+<h1>MARIA.</h1>
+
+<h2>A FRAGMENT.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. II.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-vi" id="BPg_2-vi"></a>[<a href="images/v2-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-1" id="BPg_2-1"></a>[<a href="images/v2-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3><a name="BV2_WRONGS" id="BV2_WRONGS"></a><i>WRONGS</i></h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr />
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_IX" id="BCHAP_IX"></a>CHAP. IX.</h2>
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">I Resume</span> my pen to fly from thought.
+I was married; and we hastened to
+London. I had purposed taking one of
+my sisters with me; for a strong motive
+for marrying, was the desire of having
+a home at which I could receive them,
+now their own grew so uncomfortable,
+as not to deserve the cheering appellation.
+An objection was made to her<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-2" id="BPg_2-2"></a>[<a href="images/v2-2.png">2</a>]</span>
+accompanying me, that appeared plausible;
+and I reluctantly acquiesced. I
+was however willingly allowed to take
+with me Molly, poor Peggy's daughter.
+London and preferment, are ideas commonly
+associated in the country; and,
+as blooming as May, she bade adieu to
+Peggy with weeping eyes. I did not
+even feel hurt at the refusal in relation
+to my sister, till hearing what my uncle
+had done for me, I had the simplicity
+to request, speaking with warmth of
+their situation, that he would give them
+a thousand pounds a-piece, which
+seemed to me but justice. He asked
+me, giving me a kiss, 'If I had lost my
+senses?' I started back, as if I had
+found a wasp in a rose-bush. I expostulated.
+He sneered; and the demon
+of discord entered our paradise, to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-3" id="BPg_2-3"></a>[<a href="images/v2-3.png">3</a>]</span>
+poison with his pestiferous breath every
+opening joy.</p>
+
+<p>"I had sometimes observed defects
+in my husband's understanding; but, led
+astray by a prevailing opinion, that
+goodness of disposition is of the first importance
+in the relative situations of
+life, in proportion as I perceived the
+narrowness of his understanding, fancy
+enlarged the boundary of his heart.
+Fatal error! How quickly is the so
+much vaunted milkiness of nature turned
+into gall, by an intercourse with the
+world, if more generous juices do not
+sustain the vital source of virtue!</p>
+
+<p>"One trait in my character was extreme
+credulity; but, when my eyes were
+once opened, I saw but too clearly all
+I had before overlooked. My husband
+was sunk in my esteem; still there are
+youthful emotions, which, for a while,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-4" id="BPg_2-4"></a>[<a href="images/v2-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+fill up the chasm of love and friendship.
+Besides, it required some time to enable
+me to see his whole character in a
+just light, or rather to allow it to become
+fixed. While circumstances were
+ripening my faculties, and cultivating
+my taste, commerce and gross relaxations
+were shutting his against any
+possibility of improvement, till, by
+stifling every spark of virtue in himself,
+he began to imagine that it no where
+existed.</p>
+
+<p>"Do not let me lead you astray, my
+child, I do not mean to assert, that
+any human being is entirely incapable
+of feeling the generous emotions, which
+are the foundation of every true principle
+of virtue; but they are frequently,
+I fear, so feeble, that, like the inflammable
+quality which more or less
+lurks in all bodies, they often lie for<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-5" id="BPg_2-5"></a>[<a href="images/v2-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+ever dormant; the circumstances never
+occurring, necessary to call them into
+action.</p>
+
+<p>"I discovered however by chance,
+that, in consequence of some losses in
+trade, the natural effect of his gambling
+desire to start suddenly into riches,
+the five thousand pounds given me by
+my uncle, had been paid very opportunely.
+This discovery, strange as you
+may think the assertion, gave me pleasure;
+my husband's embarrassments
+endeared him to me. I was glad to
+find an excuse for his conduct to my
+sisters, and my mind became calmer.</p>
+
+<p>"My uncle introduced me to some
+literary society; and the theatres were
+a never-failing source of amusement to
+me. My delighted eye followed Mrs.
+Siddons, when, with dignified delicacy,
+she played Calista; and I involuntarily<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-6" id="BPg_2-6"></a>[<a href="images/v2-6.png">6</a>]</span>
+repeated after her, in the same tone,
+and with a long-drawn sigh,</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">'Hearts like our's were pair'd&mdash;not match'd.'<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>"These were, at first, spontaneous
+emotions, though, becoming acquainted
+with men of wit and polished manners,
+I could not sometimes help regretting
+my early marriage; and that,
+in my haste to escape from a temporary
+dependence, and expand my newly
+fledged wings, in an unknown sky, I
+had been caught in a trap, and caged
+for life. Still the novelty of London,
+and the attentive fondness of my husband,
+for he had some personal regard
+for me, made several months glide
+away. Yet, not forgetting the situation
+of my sisters, who were still very
+young, I prevailed on my uncle to set<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-7" id="BPg_2-7"></a>[<a href="images/v2-7.png">7</a>]</span>tle
+a thousand pounds on each; and
+to place them in a school near town,
+where I could frequently visit, as well
+as have them at home with me.</p>
+
+<p>"I now tried to improve my husband's
+taste, but we had few subjects in
+common; indeed he soon appeared
+to have little relish for my society, unless
+he was hinting to me the use he
+could make of my uncle's wealth.
+When we had company, I was disgusted
+by an ostentatious display of
+riches, and I have often quitted the
+room, to avoid listening to exaggerated
+tales of money obtained by lucky hits.</p>
+
+<p>"With all my attention and affectionate
+interest, I perceived that I
+could not become the friend or confident
+of my husband. Every thing I
+learned relative to his affairs I gathered
+up by accident; and I vainly endea<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-8" id="BPg_2-8"></a>[<a href="images/v2-8.png">8</a>]</span>voured
+to establish, at our fire-side,
+that social converse, which often renders
+people of different characters dear to
+each other. Returning from the theatre,
+or any amusing party, I frequently
+began to relate what I had seen and
+highly relished; but with sullen taciturnity
+he soon silenced me. I seemed
+therefore gradually to lose, in his society,
+the soul, the energies of which
+had just been in action. To such a degree,
+in fact, did his cold, reserved
+manner affect me, that, after spending
+some days with him alone, I have
+imagined myself the most stupid creature
+in the world, till the abilities of
+some casual visitor convinced me that I
+had some dormant animation, and sentiments
+above the dust in which I had
+been groveling. The very countenance
+of my husband changed; his com<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-9" id="BPg_2-9"></a>[<a href="images/v2-9.png">9</a>]</span>plexion
+became sallow, and all the
+charms of youth were vanishing with
+its vivacity.</p>
+
+<p>"I give you one view of the subject;
+but these experiments and alterations
+took up the space of five years; during
+which period, I had most reluctantly extorted
+several sums from my uncle, to
+save my husband, to use his own words,
+from destruction. At first it was to prevent
+bills being noted, to the injury of
+his credit; then to bail him; and afterwards
+to prevent an execution from
+entering the house. I began at last to
+conclude, that he would have made
+more exertions of his own to extricate
+himself, had he not relied on mine,
+cruel as was the task he imposed on me;
+and I firmly determined that I would
+make use of no more pretexts.</p>
+
+<p>"From the moment I pronounced<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-10" id="BPg_2-10"></a>[<a href="images/v2-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+this determination, indifference on his
+part was changed into rudeness, or
+something worse.</p>
+
+<p>"He now seldom dined at home,
+and continually returned at a late hour,
+drunk, to bed. I retired to another
+apartment; I was glad, I own, to
+escape from his; for personal intimacy
+without affection, seemed, to me the
+most degrading, as well as the most
+painful state in which a woman of any
+taste, not to speak of the peculiar delicacy
+of fostered sensibility, could be
+placed. But my husband's fondness
+for women was of the grossest kind,
+and imagination was so wholly out of
+the question, as to render his indulgences
+of this sort entirely promiscuous,
+and of the most brutal nature.
+My health suffered, before my heart
+was entirely estranged by the loath<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-11" id="BPg_2-11"></a>[<a href="images/v2-11.png">11</a>]</span>some
+information; could I then have
+returned to his sullied arms, but as a
+victim to the prejudices of mankind,
+who have made women the property of
+their husbands? I discovered even,
+by his conversation, when intoxicated,
+that his favourites were wantons of the
+lowest class, who could by their vulgar,
+indecent mirth, which he called nature,
+rouse his sluggish spirits. Meretricious
+ornaments and manners were
+necessary to attract his attention. He
+seldom looked twice at a modest woman,
+and sat silent in their company;
+and the charms of youth and beauty
+had not the slightest effect on his senses,
+unless the possessors were initiated in
+vice. His intimacy with profligate women,
+and his habits of thinking, gave
+him a contempt for female endowments;
+and he would repeat, when<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-12" id="BPg_2-12"></a>[<a href="images/v2-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+wine had loosed his tongue, most of the
+common-place sarcasms levelled at
+them, by men who do not allow them
+to have minds, because mind would be
+an impediment to gross enjoyment.
+Men who are inferior to their fellow
+men, are always most anxious to establish
+their superiority over women.
+But where are these reflections leading
+me?</p>
+
+<p>"Women who have lost their husband's
+affection, are justly reproved for
+neglecting their persons, and not taking
+the same pains to keep, as to gain a
+heart; but who thinks of giving the
+same advice to men, though women
+are continually stigmatized for being
+attached to fops; and from the nature
+of their education, are more susceptible
+of disgust? Yet why a woman should
+be expected to endure a sloven, with<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-13" id="BPg_2-13"></a>[<a href="images/v2-13.png">13</a>]</span>
+more patience than a man, and magnanimously
+to govern herself, I cannot
+conceive; unless it be supposed arrogant
+in her to look for respect as well as a
+maintenance. It is not easy to be
+pleased, because, after promising to
+love, in different circumstances, we are
+told that it is our duty. I cannot, I
+am sure (though, when attending the
+sick, I never felt disgust) forget my
+own sensations, when rising with health
+and spirit, and after scenting the sweet
+morning, I have met my husband at
+the breakfast table. The active attention
+I had been giving to domestic regulations,
+which were generally settled
+before he rose, or a walk, gave a glow
+to my countenance, that contrasted with
+his squallid appearance. The squeamishness
+of stomach alone, produced
+by the last night's intemperance, which<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-14" id="BPg_2-14"></a>[<a href="images/v2-14.png">14</a>]</span>
+he took no pains to conceal, destroyed
+my appetite. I think I now see him
+lolling in an arm-chair, in a dirty powdering
+gown, soiled linen, ungartered
+stockings, and tangled hair, yawning
+and stretching himself. The newspaper
+was immediately called for, if not
+brought in on the tea-board, from
+which he would scarcely lift his eyes
+while I poured out the tea, excepting
+to ask for some brandy to put into it, or
+to declare that he could not eat. In
+answer to any question, in his best humour,
+it was a drawling 'What do
+you say, child?' But if I demanded
+money for the house expences, which I
+put off till the last moment, his customary
+reply, often prefaced with an
+oath, was, 'Do you think me, madam,
+made of money?'&mdash;The butcher,
+the baker, must wait; and, what was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-15" id="BPg_2-15"></a>[<a href="images/v2-15.png">15</a>]</span>
+worse, I was often obliged to witness
+his surly dismission of tradesmen, who
+were in want of their money, and
+whom I sometimes paid with the presents
+my uncle gave me for my own
+use.</p>
+
+<p><ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">"</ins>At this juncture my father's mistress,
+by terrifying his conscience, prevailed
+on him to marry her; he was already
+become a methodist; and my brother,
+who now practised for himself, had discovered
+a flaw in the settlement made
+on my mother's children, which set it
+aside, and he allowed my father, whose
+distress made him submit to any thing,
+a tithe of his own, or rather our fortune.</p>
+
+<p><ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">"</ins>My sisters had left school, but were
+unable to endure home, which my father's
+wife rendered as disagreeable as
+possible, to get rid of girls whom she<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-16" id="BPg_2-16"></a>[<a href="images/v2-16.png">16</a>]</span>
+regarded as spies on her conduct. They
+were accomplished, yet you can (may
+you never be reduced to the same destitute
+state!) scarcely conceive the trouble
+I had to place them in the situation
+of governesses, the only one in which
+even a well-educated woman, with
+more than ordinary talents, can struggle
+for a subsistence; and even this is a
+dependence next to menial. Is it then
+surprising, that so many forlorn women,
+with human passions and feelings, take
+refuge in infamy? Alone in large mansions,
+I say alone, because they had no
+companions with whom they could converse
+on equal terms, or from whom
+they could expect the endearments of
+affection, they grew melancholy, and
+the sound of joy made them sad; and
+the youngest, having a more delicate
+frame, fell into a decline. It was with<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-17" id="BPg_2-17"></a>[<a href="images/v2-17.png">17</a>]</span>
+great difficulty that I, who now almost
+supported the house by loans from my
+uncle, could prevail on the <i>master</i> of it,
+to allow her a room to die in. I watched
+her sick bed for some months, and then
+closed her eyes, gentle spirit! for ever.
+She was pretty, with very engaging
+manners; yet had never an opportunity
+to marry, excepting to a very old man.
+She had abilities sufficient to have
+shone in any profession, had there been
+any professions for women, though she
+shrunk at the name of milliner or mantua-maker
+as degrading to a gentlewoman.
+I would not term this feeling
+false pride to any one but you, my
+child, whom I fondly hope to see (yes;
+I will indulge the hope for a moment!)
+possessed of that energy of character
+which gives dignity to any station; and
+with that clear, firm spirit that will en<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-18" id="BPg_2-18"></a>[<a href="images/v2-18.png">18</a>]</span>able
+you to choose a situation for yourself,
+or submit to be classed in the lowest,
+if it be the only one in which you
+can be the mistress of your own actions.</p>
+
+<p>"Soon after the death of my sister,
+an incident occurred, to prove to me that
+the heart of a libertine is dead to natural
+affection; and to convince me,
+that the being who has appeared all
+tenderness, to gratify a selfish passion,
+is as regardless of the innocent fruit of
+it, as of the object, when the fit is over.
+I had casually observed an old, mean-looking
+woman, who called on my husband
+every two or three months to receive
+some money. One day entering
+the passage of his little counting-house,
+as she was going out, I
+heard her say, 'The child is very weak;
+she cannot live long, she will soon die<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-19" id="BPg_2-19"></a>[<a href="images/v2-19.png">19</a>]</span>
+out of your way, so you need not grudge
+her a little physic.'</p>
+
+<p>"'So much the better,' he replied,
+'and pray mind your own business,
+good woman.'</p>
+
+<p>"I was struck by his unfeeling, inhuman
+tone of voice, and drew back,
+determined when the woman came
+again, to try to speak to her, not out
+of curiosity, I had heard enough, but
+with the hope of being useful to a poor,
+outcast girl.</p>
+
+<p>"A month or two elapsed before I
+saw this woman again; and then she
+had a child in her hand that tottered
+along, scarcely able to sustain her own
+weight. They were going away, to
+return at the hour Mr. Venables was
+expected; he was now from home. I
+desired the woman to walk into the
+parlour. She hesitated, yet obeyed.<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-20" id="BPg_2-20"></a>[<a href="images/v2-20.png">20</a>]</span>
+I assured her that I should not mention
+to my husband (the word seemed to
+weigh on my respiration), that I had seen
+her, or his child. The woman stared
+at me with astonishment; and I turned
+my eyes on the squalid object [that accompanied
+her.] She could hardly support
+herself, her complexion was sallow,
+and her eyes inflamed, with an indescribable
+look of cunning, mixed with
+the wrinkles produced by the peevishness
+of pain.</p>
+
+<p>"<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">'</ins>Poor child!' I exclaimed. 'Ah!
+you may well say poor child,' replied
+the woman. 'I brought her here to see
+whether he would have the heart to
+look at her, and not get some advice.
+I do not know what they deserve who
+nursed her. Why, her legs bent under
+her like a bow when she came to me,
+and she has never been well since; but,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-21" id="BPg_2-21"></a>[<a href="images/v2-21.png">21</a>]</span>
+if they were no better paid than I am,
+it is not to be wondered at, sure
+enough.'</p>
+
+<p>"On further enquiry I was informed,
+that this miserable spectacle was the
+daughter of a servant, a country girl,
+who caught Mr. Venables' eye, and
+whom he seduced. On his marriage he
+sent her away, her situation being too
+visible. After her delivery, she was
+thrown on the town; and died in an
+hospital within the year. The babe
+was sent to a parish-nurse, and afterwards
+to this woman, who did not
+seem much better; but what was to be
+expected from such a close bargain?
+She was only paid three shillings a week
+for board and washing.</p>
+
+<p>"The woman begged me to give her
+some old clothes for the child, assuring
+me, that she was almost afraid to ask<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-22" id="BPg_2-22"></a>[<a href="images/v2-22.png">22</a>]</span>
+master for money to buy even a pair
+of shoes.</p>
+
+<p>"I grew sick at heart. And, fearing
+Mr. Venables might enter, and oblige
+me to express my abhorrence, I hastily
+enquired where she lived, promised to
+pay her two shillings a week more, and
+to call on her in a day or two; putting
+a trifle into her hand as a proof of my
+good intention.</p>
+
+<p>"If the state of this child affected me,
+what were my feelings at a discovery I
+made respecting Peggy&mdash;&mdash;?<a name="BFNanchor_22-A_6" id="BFNanchor_22-A_6"></a><a href="#BFootnote_22-A_6" class="fnanchor">[22-A]</a></p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_22-A_6" id="BFootnote_22-A_6"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_22-A_6"><span class="label">[22-A]</span></a> The manuscript is imperfect here. An episode
+seems to have been intended, which was
+never committed to paper.
+</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-23" id="BPg_2-23"></a>[<a href="images/v2-23.png">23</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_X" id="BCHAP_X"></a>CHAP. X.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">My</span> father's situation was now so
+distressing, that I prevailed on my uncle
+to accompany me to visit him; and
+to lend me his assistance, to prevent the
+whole property of the family from becoming
+the prey of my brother's rapacity;
+for, to extricate himself out of
+present difficulties, my father was totally
+regardless of futurity. I took
+down with me some presents for my
+step-mother; it did not require an effort
+for me to treat her with civility, or
+to forget the past.</p>
+
+<p>"This was the first time I had visited
+my native village, since my marriage.
+But with what different emotions did
+I return from the busy world, with a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-24" id="BPg_2-24"></a>[<a href="images/v2-24.png">24</a>]</span>
+heavy weight of experience benumbing
+my imagination, to scenes, that whispered
+recollections of joy and hope
+most eloquently to my heart! The
+first scent of the wild flowers from the
+heath, thrilled through my veins, awakening
+every sense to pleasure. The icy
+hand of despair seemed to be removed
+from my bosom; and&mdash;forgetting my
+husband&mdash;the nurtured visions of a romantic
+mind, bursting on me with all
+their original wildness and gay exuberance,
+were again hailed as sweet realities.
+I forgot, with equal facility,
+that I ever felt sorrow, or knew care
+in the country; while a transient rainbow
+stole athwart the cloudy sky of despondency.
+The picturesque form of
+several favourite trees, and the porches
+of rude cottages, with their smiling
+hedges, were recognized with the glad<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-25" id="BPg_2-25"></a>[<a href="images/v2-25.png">25</a>]</span>some
+playfulness of childish vivacity.
+I could have kissed the chickens that
+pecked on the common; and longed to
+pat the cows, and frolic with the dogs
+that sported on it. I gazed with delight
+on the windmill, and thought it
+lucky that it should be in motion, at
+the moment I passed by; and entering
+the dear green lane, which led directly
+to the village, the sound of the well-known
+rookery gave that sentimental
+tinge to the varying sensations of my
+active soul, which only served to
+heighten the lustre of the luxuriant
+scenery. But, spying, as I advanced,
+the spire, peeping over the withered tops
+of the aged elms that composed the
+rookery, my thoughts flew immediately
+to the church-yard, and tears of affection,
+such was the effect of my imagination,
+bedewed my mother's grave!<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-26" id="BPg_2-26"></a>[<a href="images/v2-26.png">26</a>]</span>
+Sorrow gave place to devotional feelings.
+I wandered through the church
+in fancy, as I used sometimes to do on
+a Saturday evening. I recollected with
+what fervour I addressed the God of
+my youth: and once more with rapturous
+love looked above my sorrows
+to the Father of nature. I pause&mdash;feeling
+forcibly all the emotions I am describing;
+and (reminded, as I register
+my sorrows, of the sublime calm I have
+felt, when in some tremendous solitude,
+my soul rested on itself, and
+seemed to fill the universe) I insensibly
+breathe soft, hushing every wayward
+emotion, as if fearing to sully with a
+sigh, a contentment so extatic.</p>
+
+<p>"Having settled my father's affairs,
+and, by my exertions in his favour, made
+my brother my sworn foe, I returned
+to London. My husband's conduct<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-27" id="BPg_2-27"></a>[<a href="images/v2-27.png">27</a>]</span>
+was now changed; I had during my
+absence, received several affectionate,
+penitential letters from him; and he
+seemed on my arrival, to wish by his
+behaviour to prove his sincerity. I
+could not then conceive why he acted
+thus; and, when the suspicion darted
+into my head, that it might arise from
+observing my increasing influence with
+my uncle, I almost despised myself for
+imagining that such a degree of debasing
+selfishness could exist.</p>
+
+<p>"He became, unaccountable as was
+the change, tender and attentive; and,
+attacking my weak side, made a confession
+of his follies, and lamented the
+embarrassments in which I, who merited
+a far different fate, might be involved.
+He besought me to aid him with my
+counsel, praised my understanding, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-28" id="BPg_2-28"></a>[<a href="images/v2-28.png">28</a>]</span>
+appealed to the tenderness of my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>"This conduct only inspired me with
+compassion. I wished to be his friend;
+but love had spread his rosy pinions,
+and fled far, far away; and had not
+(like some exquisite perfumes, the fine
+spirit of which is continually mingling
+with the air) left a fragrance behind,
+to mark where he had shook his wings.
+My husband's renewed caresses then
+became hateful to me; his brutality
+was tolerable, compared to his distasteful
+fondness. Still, compassion, and
+the fear of insulting his supposed feelings,
+by a want of sympathy, made
+me dissemble, and do violence to my
+delicacy. What a task!</p>
+
+<p>"Those who support a system of
+what I term false refinement, and will<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-29" id="BPg_2-29"></a>[<a href="images/v2-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+not allow great part of love in the female,
+as well as male breast, to spring
+in some respects involuntarily, may not
+admit that charms are as necessary to
+feed the passion, as virtues to convert
+the mellowing spirit into friendship. To
+such observers I have nothing to say,
+any more than to the moralists, who insist
+that women ought to, and can love
+their husbands, because it is their duty.
+To you, my child, I may add, with a
+heart tremblingly alive to your future
+conduct, some observations, dictated
+by my present feelings, on calmly reviewing
+this period of my life. When
+novelists or moralists praise as a virtue,
+a woman's coldness of constitution, and
+want of passion; and make her yield
+to the ardour of her lover out of sheer
+compassion, or to promote a frigid plan
+of future comfort, I am disgusted.<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-30" id="BPg_2-30"></a>[<a href="images/v2-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+They may be good women, in the ordinary
+acceptation of the phrase, and do
+no harm; but they appear to me not to
+have those 'finely fashioned nerves,'
+which render the senses exquisite. They
+may possess tenderness; but they want
+that fire of the imagination, which produces
+<i>active</i> sensibility, and <i>positive</i> virtue.
+How does the woman deserve to
+be characterized, who marries one man,
+with a heart and imagination devoted
+to another? Is she not an object of
+pity or contempt, when thus sacrilegiously
+violating the purity of her own
+feelings? Nay, it is as indelicate, when
+she is indifferent, unless she be constitutionally
+insensible; then indeed it is
+a mere affair of barter; and I have nothing
+to do with the secrets of trade.
+Yes; eagerly as I wish you to possess
+true rectitude of mind, and purity of<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-31" id="BPg_2-31"></a>[<a href="images/v2-31.png">31</a>]</span>
+affection, I must insist that a heartless
+conduct is the contrary of virtuous.
+Truth is the only basis of virtue; and
+we cannot, without depraving our
+minds, endeavour to please a lover or
+husband, but in proportion as he
+pleases us. Men, more effectually to
+enslave us, may inculcate this partial
+morality, and lose sight of virtue in
+subdividing it into the duties of particular
+stations; but let us not blush for
+nature without a cause!</p>
+
+<p>"After these remarks, I am ashamed
+to own, that I was pregnant. The
+greatest sacrifice of my principles in my
+whole life, was the allowing my husband
+again to be familiar with my person,
+though to this cruel act of self-denial,
+when I wished the earth to
+open and swallow me, you owe your
+birth; and I the unutterable pleasure<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-32" id="BPg_2-32"></a>[<a href="images/v2-32.png">32</a>]</span>
+of being a mother. There was something
+of delicacy in my husband's bridal
+attentions; but now his tainted breath,
+pimpled face, and blood-shot eyes,
+were not more repugnant to my senses,
+than his gross manners, and loveless
+familiarity to my taste.</p>
+
+<p>"A man would only be expected to
+maintain; yes, barely grant a subsistence,
+to a woman rendered odious by
+habitual intoxication; but who would
+expect him, or think it possible to love
+her? And unless 'youth, and genial
+years were flown,' it would be thought
+equally unreasonable to insist, [under
+penalty of] forfeiting almost every thing
+reckoned valuable in life, that he
+should not love another: whilst woman,
+weak in reason, impotent in will,
+is required to moralize, sentimentalize
+herself to stone, and pine her life away,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-33" id="BPg_2-33"></a>[<a href="images/v2-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+labouring to reform her embruted
+mate. He may even spend in dissipation,
+and intemperance, the very intemperance
+which renders him so hateful,
+her property, and by stinting her
+expences, not permit her to beguile in
+society, a wearisome, joyless life; for
+over their mutual fortune she has no
+power, it must all pass through his
+hand. And if she be a mother, and
+in the present state of women, it is a
+great misfortune to be prevented from
+discharging the duties, and cultivating
+the affections of one, what has she not
+to endure?&mdash;But I have suffered the
+tenderness of one to lead me into reflections
+that I did not think of making,
+to interrupt my narrative&mdash;yet the full
+heart will overflow.</p>
+
+<p>"Mr. Venables' embarrassments did
+not now endear him to me; still, anxi<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-34" id="BPg_2-34"></a>[<a href="images/v2-34.png">34</a>]</span>ous
+to befriend him, I endeavoured to
+prevail on him to retrench his expences;
+but he had always some plausible
+excuse to give, to justify his not
+following my advice. Humanity, compassion,
+and the interest produced by a
+habit of living together, made me try
+to relieve, and sympathize with him;
+but, when I recollected that I was
+bound to live with such a being for
+ever&mdash;my heart died within me; my
+desire of improvement became languid,
+and baleful, corroding melancholy took
+possession of my soul. Marriage had
+bastilled me for life. I discovered in
+myself a capacity for the enjoyment of
+the various pleasures existence affords;
+yet, fettered by the partial laws of society,
+this fair globe was to me an
+universal blank.</p>
+
+<p>"When I exhorted my husband to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-35" id="BPg_2-35"></a>[<a href="images/v2-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+economy, I referred to himself. I was
+obliged to practise the most rigid, or
+contract debts, which I had too much
+reason to fear would never be paid. I
+despised this paltry privilege of a wife,
+which can only be of use to the vicious
+or inconsiderate, and determined not to
+increase the torrent that was bearing
+him down. I was then ignorant of
+the extent of his fraudulent speculations,
+whom I was bound to honour
+and obey.</p>
+
+<p>"A woman neglected by her husband,
+or whose manners form a striking
+contrast with his, will always have
+men on the watch to soothe and flatter
+her. Besides, the forlorn state of a
+neglected woman, not destitute of personal
+charms, is particularly interesting,
+and rouses that species of pity,
+which is so near akin, it easily slides<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-36" id="BPg_2-36"></a>[<a href="images/v2-36.png">36</a>]</span>
+into love. A man of feeling thinks
+not of seducing, he is himself seduced
+by all the noblest emotions of his soul.
+He figures to himself all the sacrifices a
+woman of sensibility must make, and
+every situation in which his imagination
+places her, touches his heart,
+and fires his passions. Longing to
+take to his bosom the shorn lamb, and
+bid the drooping buds of hope revive,
+benevolence changes into passion:
+and should he then discover that he is
+beloved, honour binds him fast, though
+foreseeing that he may afterwards be
+obliged to pay severe damages to the
+man, who never appeared to value his
+wife's society, till he found that there
+was a chance of his being indemnified
+for the loss of it.</p>
+
+<p>"Such are the partial laws enacted
+by men; for, only to lay a stress on the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-37" id="BPg_2-37"></a>[<a href="images/v2-37.png">37</a>]</span>
+dependent state of a woman in the
+grand question of the comforts arising
+from the possession of property, she is
+[even in this article] much more injured
+by the loss of the husband's affection,
+than he by that of his wife; yet where
+is she, condemned to the solitude of a
+deserted home, to look for a compensation
+from the woman, who seduces
+him from her? She cannot drive an
+unfaithful husband from his house, nor
+separate, or tear, his children from
+him, however culpable he may be; and
+he, still the master of his own fate, enjoys
+the smiles of a world, that would
+brand her with infamy, did she, seeking
+consolation, venture to retaliate.</p>
+
+<p>"These remarks are not dictated by
+experience; but merely by the compassion
+I feel for many amiable women,
+the <i>out-laws</i> of the world. For my<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-38" id="BPg_2-38"></a>[<a href="images/v2-38.png">38</a>]</span>self,
+never encouraging any of the advances
+that were made to me, my lovers
+dropped off like the untimely shoots of
+spring. I did not even coquet with
+them; because I found, on examining
+myself, I could not coquet with a man
+without loving him a little; and I perceived
+that I should not be able to
+stop at the line of what are termed <i>innocent
+freedoms</i>, did I suffer any. My
+reserve was then the consequence of
+delicacy. Freedom of conduct has
+emancipated many women's minds;
+but my conduct has most rigidly been
+governed by my principles, till the improvement
+of my understanding has
+enabled me to discern the fallacy of
+prejudices at war with nature and
+reason.</p>
+
+<p>"Shortly after the change I have
+mentioned in my husband's conduct,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-39" id="BPg_2-39"></a>[<a href="images/v2-39.png">39</a>]</span>
+my uncle was compelled by his declining
+health, to seek the succour of a
+milder climate, and embark for Lisbon.
+He left his will in the hands of a friend,
+an eminent solicitor; he had previously
+questioned me relative to my situation
+and state of mind, and declared very
+freely, that he could place no reliance
+on the stability of my husband's professions.
+He had been deceived in the
+unfolding of his character; he now
+thought it fixed in a train of actions
+that would inevitably lead to ruin and
+disgrace.</p>
+
+<p>"The evening before his departure,
+which we spent alone together, he
+folded me to his heart, uttering the endearing
+appellation of 'child.'&mdash;My
+more than father! why was I not permitted
+to perform the last duties of
+one, and smooth the pillow of death?<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-40" id="BPg_2-40"></a>[<a href="images/v2-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+He seemed by his manner to be convinced
+that he should never see me
+more; yet requested me, most earnestly,
+to come to him, should I be obliged to
+leave my husband. He had before expressed
+his sorrow at hearing of my
+pregnancy, having determined to prevail
+on me to accompany him, till I
+informed him of that circumstance. He
+expressed himself unfeignedly sorry that
+any new tie should bind me to a man
+whom he thought so incapable of estimating
+my value; such was the kind
+language of affection.</p>
+
+<p>"I must repeat his own words; they
+made an indelible impression on my
+mind:</p>
+
+<p>"'The marriage state is certainly that
+in which women, generally speaking,
+can be most useful; but I am far from
+thinking that a woman, once married,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-41" id="BPg_2-41"></a>[<a href="images/v2-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+ought to consider the engagement as
+indissoluble (especially if there be no
+children to reward her for sacrificing
+her feelings) in case her husband
+merits neither her love, nor esteem.
+Esteem will often supply the place of
+love; and prevent a woman from being
+wretched, though it may not
+make her happy. The magnitude of
+a sacrifice ought always to bear some
+proportion to the utility in view;
+and for a woman to live with a man,
+for whom she can cherish neither affection
+nor esteem, or even be of any
+use to him, excepting in the light of
+a house-keeper, is an abjectness of
+condition, the enduring of which no
+concurrence of circumstances can
+ever make a duty in the sight of God
+or just men. If indeed she submits to
+it merely to be maintained in idleness,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-42" id="BPg_2-42"></a>[<a href="images/v2-42.png">42</a>]</span>
+she has no right to complain bitterly
+of her fate; or to act, as a person of
+independent character might, as if
+she had a title to disregard general
+rules.</p>
+
+<p>"<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">'</ins>But the misfortune is, that many
+women only submit in appearance,
+and forfeit their own respect to secure
+their reputation in the world. The
+situation of a woman separated from
+her husband, is undoubtedly very different
+from that of a man who has
+left his wife. He, with lordly dignity,
+has shaken of a clog; and the allowing
+her food and raiment, is
+thought sufficient to secure his reputation
+from taint. And, should she
+have been inconsiderate, he will be
+celebrated for his generosity and forbearance.
+Such is the respect paid to
+the master-key of property! A wo<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-43" id="BPg_2-43"></a>[<a href="images/v2-43.png">43</a>]</span>man,
+on the contrary, resigning what
+is termed her natural protector (though
+he never was so, but in name) is
+despised and shunned, for asserting
+the independence of mind distinctive
+of a rational being, and spurning at
+slavery.'</p>
+
+<p>"During the remainder of the evening,
+my uncle's tenderness led him frequently
+to revert to the subject, and
+utter, with increasing warmth, sentiments
+to the same purport. At length
+it was necessary to say 'Farewell!'&mdash;and
+we parted&mdash;gracious God! to meet no
+more.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-44" id="BPg_2-44"></a>[<a href="images/v2-44.png">44</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XI" id="BCHAP_XI"></a>CHAP. XI.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">A gentleman</span> of large fortune
+and of polished manners, had lately
+visited very frequently at our house,
+and treated me, if possible, with more
+respect than Mr. Venables paid him;
+my pregnancy was not yet visible,
+his society was a great relief to me, as
+I had for some time past, to avoid expence,
+confined myself very much at
+home. I ever disdained unnecessary,
+perhaps even prudent concealments;
+and my husband, with great ease, discovered
+the amount of my uncle's parting
+present. A copy of a writ was the
+stale pretext to extort it from me; and
+I had soon reason to believe that it was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-45" id="BPg_2-45"></a>[<a href="images/v2-45.png">45</a>]</span>
+fabricated for the purpose. I acknowledge
+my folly in thus suffering myself
+to be continually imposed on. I had
+adhered to my resolution not to apply
+to my uncle, on the part of my husband,
+any more; yet, when I had received
+a sum sufficient to supply my own
+wants, and to enable me to pursue a
+plan I had in view, to settle my younger
+brother in a respectable employment,
+I allowed myself to be duped by
+Mr. Venables' shallow pretences, and
+hypocritical professions.</p>
+
+<p>"Thus did he pillage me and my
+family, thus frustrate all my plans of
+usefulness. Yet this was the man I was
+bound to respect and esteem: as if respect
+and esteem depended on an arbitrary
+will of our own! But a wife being
+as much a man's property as his
+horse, or his ass, she has nothing she<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-46" id="BPg_2-46"></a>[<a href="images/v2-46.png">46</a>]</span>
+can call her own. He may use any
+means to get at what the law considers
+as his, the moment his wife is in
+possession of it, even to the forcing of
+a lock, as Mr. Venables did, to search
+for notes in my writing-desk&mdash;and all
+this is done with a show of equity, because,
+forsooth, he is responsible for
+her maintenance.</p>
+
+<p>"The tender mother cannot <i>lawfully</i>
+snatch from the gripe of the
+gambling spendthrift, or beastly
+drunkard, unmindful of his offspring,
+the fortune which falls to her by
+chance; or (so flagrant is the injustice)
+what she earns by her own exertions.
+No; he can rob her with impunity,
+even to waste publicly on a courtezan;
+and the laws of her country&mdash;if women
+have a country&mdash;afford her no protection
+or redress from the oppressor, un<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-47" id="BPg_2-47"></a>[<a href="images/v2-47.png">47</a>]</span>less
+she have the plea of bodily fear;
+yet how many ways are there of goading
+the soul almost to madness, equally
+unmanly, though not so mean? When
+such laws were framed, should not
+impartial lawgivers have first decreed,
+in the style of a great assembly, who recognized
+the existence of an <i>&ecirc;tre supr&ecirc;me</i>,
+to fix the national belief, that
+the husband should always be wiser and
+more virtuous than his wife, in order
+to entitle him, with a show of justice,
+to keep this idiot, or perpetual minor,
+for ever in bondage. But I must have
+done&mdash;on this subject, my indignation
+continually runs away with me.</p>
+
+<p>"The company of the gentleman I
+have already mentioned, who had a
+general acquaintance with literature
+and subjects of taste, was grateful to
+me; my countenance brightened up as<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-48" id="BPg_2-48"></a>[<a href="images/v2-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+he approached, and I unaffectedly
+expressed the pleasure I felt. The
+amusement his conversation afforded
+me, made it easy to comply with my
+husband's request, to endeavour to render
+our house agreeable to him.</p>
+
+<p>"His attentions became more
+pointed; but, as I was not of the
+number of women, whose virtue, as
+it is termed, immediately takes alarm,
+I endeavoured, rather by raillery than
+serious expostulation, to give a different
+turn to his conversation. He assumed a
+new mode of attack, and I was, for a
+while, the dupe of his pretended
+friendship.</p>
+
+<p>"I had, merely in the style of <i>badinage</i>,
+boasted of my conquest, and repeated
+his lover-like compliments to
+my husband. But he begged me, for
+God's sake, not to affront his friend, or<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-49" id="BPg_2-49"></a>[<a href="images/v2-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+I should destroy all his projects, and be
+his ruin. Had I had more affection for
+my husband, I should have expressed
+my contempt of this time-serving politeness:
+now I imagined that I only
+felt pity; yet it would have puzzled a
+casuist to point out in what the exact
+difference consisted.</p>
+
+<p>"This friend began now, in confidence,
+to discover to me the real state
+of my husband's affairs. 'Necessity,'
+said Mr. S&mdash;&mdash;; why should I reveal
+his name? for he affected to palliate the
+conduct he could not excuse, 'had
+led him to take such steps, by accommodation
+bills, buying goods on credit,
+to sell them for ready money, and similar
+transactions, that his character in
+the commercial world was gone. He
+was considered,' he added, lowering
+his voice, 'on 'Change as a swindler.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-50" id="BPg_2-50"></a>[<a href="images/v2-50.png">50</a>]</span>
+"I felt at that moment the first maternal
+pang. Aware of the evils my
+sex have to struggle with, I still wished,
+for my own consolation, to be the mother
+of a daughter; and I could not
+bear to think, that the <i>sins</i> of her father's
+entailed disgrace, should be added
+to the ills to which woman is heir.</p>
+
+<p>"So completely was I deceived by
+these shows of friendship (nay, I believe,
+according to his interpretation, Mr. S&mdash;
+really was my friend) that I began
+to consult him respecting the best mode
+of retrieving my husband's character:
+it is the good name of a woman only
+that sets to rise no more. I knew
+not that he had been drawn into a
+whirlpool, out of which he had not
+the energy to attempt to escape. He
+seemed indeed destitute of the power
+of employing his faculties in any regu<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-51" id="BPg_2-51"></a>[<a href="images/v2-51.png">51</a>]</span>lar
+pursuit. His principles of action
+were so loose, and his mind so uncultivated,
+that every thing like order appeared
+to him in the shape of restraint;
+and, like men in the savage state, he
+required the strong stimulus of hope
+or fear, produced by wild speculations,
+in which the interests of others went
+for nothing, to keep his spirits awake.
+He one time possessed patriotism, but
+he knew not what it was to feel honest
+indignation; and pretended to be an advocate
+for liberty, when, with as little
+affection for the human race as for individuals,
+he thought of nothing but
+his own gratification. He was just
+such a citizen, as a father. The sums
+he adroitly obtained by a violation of
+the laws of his country, as well as
+those of humanity, he would allow a
+mistress to squander; though she was,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-52" id="BPg_2-52"></a>[<a href="images/v2-52.png">52</a>]</span>
+with the same <i>sang froid</i>, consigned, as
+were his children, to poverty, when
+another proved more attractive.</p>
+
+<p>"On various pretences, his friend
+continued to visit me; and, observing
+my want of money, he tried to induce
+me to accept of pecuniary aid; but this
+offer I absolutely rejected, though it
+was made with such delicacy, I could
+not be displeased.</p>
+
+<p>"One day he came, as I thought
+accidentally, to dinner. My husband
+was very much engaged in business,
+and quitted the room soon after the
+cloth was removed. We conversed as
+usual, till confidential advice led again
+to love. I was extremely mortified.
+I had a sincere regard for him, and
+hoped that he had an equal friendship
+for me. I therefore began mildly to
+expostulate with him. This gentle<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-53" id="BPg_2-53"></a>[<a href="images/v2-53.png">53</a>]</span>ness
+he mistook for coy encouragement;
+and he would not be diverted
+from the subject. Perceiving his mistake,
+I seriously asked him how, using
+such language to me, he could profess
+to be my husband's friend? A significant
+sneer excited my curiosity, and he,
+supposing this to be my only scruple,
+took a letter deliberately out of his
+pocket, saying, 'Your husband's honour
+is not inflexible. How could you,
+with your discernment, think it so?
+Why, he left the room this very day
+on purpose to give me an opportunity
+to explain myself; <i>he</i> thought me too
+timid&mdash;too tardy.<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">'</ins></p>
+
+<p>"I snatched the letter with indescribable
+emotion. The purport of it
+was to invite him to dinner, and to ridicule
+his chivalrous respect for me.
+He assured him, 'that every woman had<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-54" id="BPg_2-54"></a>[<a href="images/v2-54.png">54</a>]</span>
+her price, and, with gross indecency,
+hinted, that he should be glad to have
+the duty of a husband taken off his
+hands. These he termed <i>liberal sentiments</i>.
+He advised him not to shock my
+romantic notions, but to attack my
+credulous generosity, and weak pity;
+and concluded with requesting him to
+lend him five hundred pounds for a
+month or six weeks.' I read this letter
+twice over; and the firm purpose it inspired,
+calmed the rising tumult of my
+soul. I rose deliberately, requested
+Mr. S&mdash;&mdash; to wait a moment, and instantly
+going into the counting-house,
+desired Mr. Venables to return with me
+to the dining-parlour.</p>
+
+<p>"He laid down his pen, and entered
+with me, without observing any change
+in my countenance. I shut the door,
+and, giving him the letter, simply<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-55" id="BPg_2-55"></a>[<a href="images/v2-55.png">55</a>]</span>
+asked, 'whether he wrote it, or was it
+a forgery?'</p>
+
+<p>"Nothing could equal his confusion.
+His friend's eye met his, and
+he muttered something about a joke&mdash;But
+I interrupted him&mdash;'It is sufficient&mdash;We
+part for ever.'</p>
+
+<p>"I continued, with solemnity, 'I
+have borne with your tyranny and infidelities.
+I disdain to utter what I
+have borne with. I thought you unprincipled,
+but not so decidedly
+vicious. I formed a tie, in the sight of
+heaven&mdash;I have held it sacred; even
+when men, more conformable to my
+taste, have made me feel&mdash;I despise all
+subterfuge!&mdash;that I was not dead to
+love. Neglected by you, I have resolutely
+stifled the enticing emotions, and
+respected the plighted faith you outraged.
+And you dare now to insult<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-56" id="BPg_2-56"></a>[<a href="images/v2-56.png">56</a>]</span>
+me, by selling me to prostitution!&mdash;Yes&mdash;equally
+lost to delicacy and principle&mdash;you
+dared sacrilegiously to barter
+the honour of the mother of your
+child.'</p>
+
+<p>"Then, turning to Mr. S&mdash;&mdash;, I
+added, 'I call on you, Sir, to witness,'
+and I lifted my hands and eyes to heaven,
+'that, as solemnly as I took his
+name, I now abjure it,' I pulled off my
+ring, and put it on the table; 'and that
+I mean immediately to quit his house,
+never to enter it more. I will provide
+for myself and child. I leave him as
+free as I am determined to be myself&mdash;he
+shall be answerable for no debts of
+mine.'</p>
+
+<p>"Astonishment closed their lips, till
+Mr. Venables, gently pushing his
+friend, with a forced smile, out of the
+room, nature for a moment prevailed,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-57" id="BPg_2-57"></a>[<a href="images/v2-57.png">57</a>]</span>
+and, appearing like himself, he turned
+round, burning with rage, to me:
+but there was no terror in the frown,
+excepting when contrasted with the
+malignant smile which preceded it.
+He bade me 'leave the house at my
+peril; told me he despised my threats;
+I had no resource; I could not swear the
+peace against him!&mdash;I was not afraid of
+my life!&mdash;he had never struck me!'</p>
+
+<p>"He threw the letter in the fire,
+which I had incautiously left in his
+hands; and, quitting the room, locked
+the door on me.</p>
+
+<p>"When left alone, I was a moment
+or two before I could recollect myself.
+One scene had succeeded another with
+such rapidity, I almost doubted whether
+I was reflecting on a real event.
+'Was it possible? Was I, indeed,
+free?'&mdash;Yes; free I termed myself,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-58" id="BPg_2-58"></a>[<a href="images/v2-58.png">58</a>]</span>
+when I decidedly perceived the conduct
+I ought to adopt. How had I panted
+for liberty&mdash;liberty, that I would have
+purchased at any price, but that of my
+own esteem! I rose, and shook myself;
+opened the window, and methought
+the air never smelled so sweet. The face
+of heaven grew fairer as I viewed it,
+and the clouds seemed to flit away obedient
+to my wishes, to give my soul
+room to expand. I was all soul, and
+(wild as it may appear) felt as if I
+could have dissolved in the soft balmy
+gale that kissed my cheek, or have
+glided below the horizon on the glowing,
+descending beams. A seraphic satisfaction
+animated, without agitating
+my spirits; and my imagination collected,
+in visions sublimely terrible, or
+soothingly beautiful, an immense variety
+of the endless images, which nature<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-59" id="BPg_2-59"></a>[<a href="images/v2-59.png">59</a>]</span>
+affords, and fancy combines, of the
+grand and fair. The lustre of these
+bright picturesque sketches faded with
+the setting sun; but I was still alive to
+the calm delight they had diffused
+through my heart.</p>
+
+<p>"There may be advocates for matrimonial
+obedience, who, making a distinction
+between the duty of a wife and
+of a human being, may blame my conduct.&mdash;To
+them I write not&mdash;my feelings
+are not for them to analyze; and
+may you, my child, never be able to
+ascertain, by heart-rending experience,
+what your mother felt before the present
+emancipation of her mind!</p>
+
+<p>"I began to write a letter to my father,
+after closing one to my uncle;
+not to ask advice, but to signify my determination;
+when I was interrupted
+by the entrance of Mr. Venables. His<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-60" id="BPg_2-60"></a>[<a href="images/v2-60.png">60</a>]</span>
+manner was changed. His views on
+my uncle's fortune made him averse to
+my quitting his house, or he would, I
+am convinced, have been glad to have
+shaken off even the slight restraint my
+presence imposed on him; the restraint
+of showing me some respect. So far
+from having an affection for me, he
+really hated me, because he was convinced
+that I must despise him.</p>
+
+<p>"He told me, that, 'As I now had
+had time to cool and reflect, he did not
+doubt but that my prudence, and nice
+sense of propriety, would lead me to
+overlook what was passed.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Reflection,' I replied, 'had only
+confirmed my purpose, and no power
+on earth could divert me from it.'</p>
+
+<p>"Endeavouring to assume a soothing
+voice and look, when he would willingly
+have tortured me, to force me to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-61" id="BPg_2-61"></a>[<a href="images/v2-61.png">61</a>]</span>
+feel his power, his countenance had an
+infernal expression, when he desired me,
+'Not to expose myself to the servants,
+by obliging him to confine me in my
+apartment; if then I would give my
+promise not to quit the house precipitately,
+I should be free&mdash;and&mdash;.' I declared,
+interrupting him, 'that I would
+promise nothing. I had no measures
+to keep with him&mdash;I was resolved, and
+would not condescend to subterfuge.'</p>
+
+<p>"He muttered, 'that I should soon
+repent of these preposterous airs;' and,
+ordering tea to be carried into my little
+study, which had a communication with
+my bed-chamber, he once more locked
+the door upon me, and left me to my
+own meditations. I had passively followed
+him up stairs, not wishing to fatigue
+myself with unavailing exertion.</p>
+
+<p>"Nothing calms the mind like a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-62" id="BPg_2-62"></a>[<a href="images/v2-62.png">62</a>]</span>
+fixed purpose. I felt as if I had heaved
+a thousand weight from my heart; the
+atmosphere seemed lightened; and, if
+I execrated the institutions of society,
+which thus enable men to tyrannize
+over women, it was almost a disinterested
+sentiment. I disregarded present
+inconveniences, when my mind had
+done struggling with itself,&mdash;when reason
+and inclination had shaken hands
+and were at peace. I had no longer
+the cruel task before me, in endless perspective,
+aye, during the tedious
+for ever of life, of labouring to
+overcome my repugnance&mdash;of labouring
+to extinguish the hopes, the maybes
+of a lively imagination. Death I
+had hailed as my only chance for deliverance;
+but, while existence had still
+so many charms, and life promised
+happiness, I shrunk from the icy arms<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-63" id="BPg_2-63"></a>[<a href="images/v2-63.png">63</a>]</span>
+of an unknown tyrant, though far more
+inviting than those of the man, to whom I
+supposed myself bound without any other
+alternative; and was content to linger
+a little longer, waiting for I knew not
+what, rather than leave 'the warm
+precincts of the cheerful day,' and all
+the unenjoyed affection of my nature.</p>
+
+<p>"My present situation gave a new
+turn to my reflection; and I wondered
+(now the film seemed to be withdrawn,
+that obscured the piercing sight of reason)
+how I could, previously to the deciding
+outrage, have considered myself
+as everlastingly united to vice and folly?
+'Had an evil genius cast a spell at my
+birth; or a demon stalked out of chaos,
+to perplex my understanding, and enchain
+my will, with delusive prejudices?'</p>
+
+<p>"I pursued this train of thinking; it<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-64" id="BPg_2-64"></a>[<a href="images/v2-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+led me out of myself, to expatiate on
+the misery peculiar to my sex. 'Are
+not,' I thought, 'the despots for ever
+stigmatized, who, in the wantonness of
+power, commanded even the most atrocious
+criminals to be chained to dead
+bodies? though surely those laws are
+much more inhuman, which forge adamantine
+fetters to bind minds together,
+that never can mingle in social communion!
+What indeed can equal the
+wretchedness of that state, in which
+there is no alternative, but to extinguish
+the affections, or encounter infamy?'</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-65" id="BPg_2-65"></a>[<a href="images/v2-65.png">65</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XII" id="BCHAP_XII"></a>CHAP. XII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">Towards</span> midnight Mr. Venables
+entered my chamber; and, with
+calm audacity preparing to go to bed,
+he bade me make haste, 'for that was
+the best place for husbands and wives
+to end their differences. He had been
+drinking plentifully to aid his courage.</p>
+
+<p>"I did not at first deign to reply.
+But perceiving that he affected to take
+my silence for consent, I told him that,
+'If he would not go to another bed, or
+allow me, I should sit up in my study
+all night.' He attempted to pull me
+into the chamber, half joking. But I
+resisted; and, as he had determined not
+to give me any reason for saying that
+he used violence, after a few more ef<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-66" id="BPg_2-66"></a>[<a href="images/v2-66.png">66</a>]</span>forts,
+he retired, cursing my obstinacy,
+to bed.</p>
+
+<p>"I sat musing some time longer; then,
+throwing my cloak around me, prepared
+for sleep on a sopha. And, so fortunate
+seemed my deliverance, so sacred
+the pleasure of being thus wrapped up
+in myself, that I slept profoundly, and
+woke with a mind composed to encounter
+the struggles of the day. Mr.
+Venables did not wake till some hours
+after; and then he came to me half-dressed,
+yawning and stretching, with
+haggard eyes, as if he scarcely recollected
+what had passed the preceding
+evening. He fixed his eyes on me for
+a moment, then, calling me a fool,
+asked 'How long I intended to continue
+this pretty farce? For his part, he
+was devilish sick of it; but this was the
+plague of marrying women who pretended
+to know something.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-67" id="BPg_2-67"></a>[<a href="images/v2-67.png">67</a>]</span>
+"I made no other reply to this harangue,
+than to say, 'That he ought to
+be glad to get rid of a woman so unfit
+to be his companion&mdash;and that any
+change in my conduct would be mean
+dissimulation; for maturer reflection
+only gave the sacred seal of reason to
+my first resolution.'</p>
+
+<p>"He looked as if he could have
+stamped with impatience, at being
+obliged to stifle his rage; but, conquering
+his anger (for weak people, whose
+passions seem the most ungovernable,
+restrain them with the greatest ease,
+when they have a sufficient motive), he
+exclaimed, 'Very pretty, upon my
+soul! very pretty, theatrical flourishes!
+Pray, fair Roxana, stoop from your altitudes,
+and remember that you are
+acting a part in real life.'</p>
+
+<p>"He uttered this speech with a self-<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-68" id="BPg_2-68"></a>[<a href="images/v2-68.png">68</a>]</span>satisfied
+air, and went down stairs to
+dress.</p>
+
+<p>"In about an hour he came to me
+again; and in the same tone said, 'That
+he came as my gentleman-usher to hand
+me down to breakfast.</p>
+
+<p>"'Of the black rod?' asked I.</p>
+
+<p>"This question, and the tone in
+which I asked it, a little disconcerted
+him. To say the truth, I now felt no
+resentment; my firm resolution to free
+myself from my ignoble thraldom, had
+absorbed the various emotions which,
+during six years, had racked my soul.
+The duty pointed out by my principles
+seemed clear; and not one tender feeling
+intruded to make me swerve: The
+dislike which my husband had inspired
+was strong; but it only led me to wish
+to avoid, to wish to let him drop out of
+my memory; there was no misery, no<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-69" id="BPg_2-69"></a>[<a href="images/v2-69.png">69</a>]</span>
+torture that I would not deliberately
+have chosen, rather than renew my
+lease of servitude.</p>
+
+<p>"During the breakfast, he attempted
+to reason with me on the folly of romantic
+sentiments; for this was the indiscriminate
+epithet he gave to every
+mode of conduct or thinking superior
+to his own. He asserted, 'that all the
+world were governed by their own interest;
+those who pretended to be actuated
+by different motives, were only
+deeper knaves, or fools crazed by books,
+who took for gospel all the rodomantade
+nonsense written by men who
+knew nothing of the world. For his
+part, he thanked God, he was no hypocrite;
+and, if he stretched a point
+sometimes, it was always with an intention
+of paying every man his own.'</p>
+
+<p>"He then artfully insinuated, 'that<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-70" id="BPg_2-70"></a>[<a href="images/v2-70.png">70</a>]</span>
+he daily expected a vessel to arrive, a
+successful speculation, that would make
+him easy for the present, and that he
+had several other schemes actually depending,
+that could not fail. He had
+no doubt of becoming rich in a few
+years, though he had been thrown back
+by some unlucky adventures at the setting
+out.'</p>
+
+<p>"I mildly replied, 'That I wished he
+might not involve himself still deeper.'</p>
+
+<p>"He had no notion that I was governed
+by a decision of judgment, not
+to be compared with a mere spurt of
+resentment. He knew not what it was
+to feel indignation against vice, and
+often boasted of his placable temper,
+and readiness to forgive injuries. True;
+for he only considered the being deceived,
+as an effort of skill he had not
+guarded against; and then, with a cant<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-71" id="BPg_2-71"></a>[<a href="images/v2-71.png">71</a>]</span>
+of candour, would observe, 'that he
+did not know how he might himself
+have been tempted to act in the same
+circumstances.' And, as his heart
+never opened to friendship, it never was
+wounded by disappointment. Every
+new acquaintance he protested, it is
+true, was 'the cleverest fellow in the
+world;<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">'</ins> and he really thought so; till
+the novelty of his conversation or manners
+ceased to have any effect on his
+sluggish spirits. His respect for rank or
+fortune was more permanent, though
+he chanced to have no design of availing
+himself of the influence of either
+to promote his own views.</p>
+
+<p>"After a prefatory conversation,&mdash;my
+blood (I thought it had been cooler)
+flushed over my whole countenance as
+he spoke&mdash;he alluded to my situation.
+He desired me to reflect&mdash;'and act like<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-72" id="BPg_2-72"></a>[<a href="images/v2-72.png">72</a>]</span>
+a prudent woman, as the best proof of
+my superior understanding; for he must
+own I had sense, did I know how to
+use it. I was not,' he laid a stress on
+his words, 'without my passions; and
+a husband was a convenient cloke.&mdash;He
+was liberal in his way of thinking;
+and why might not we, like many other
+married people, who were above vulgar
+prejudices, tacitly consent to let
+each other follow their own inclination?&mdash;He
+meant nothing more, in the
+letter I made the ground of complaint;
+and the pleasure which I seemed to
+take in Mr. S.'s company, led him to
+conclude, that he was not disagreeable
+to me.'</p>
+
+<p>"A clerk brought in the letters of
+the day, and I, as I often did, while
+he was discussing subjects of business,
+went to the <i>piano forte</i>, and began to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-73" id="BPg_2-73"></a>[<a href="images/v2-73.png">73</a>]</span>
+play a favourite air to restore myself,
+as it were, to nature, and drive the
+sophisticated sentiments I had just been
+obliged to listen to, out of my soul.</p>
+
+<p>"They had excited sensations similar
+to those I have felt, in viewing the squalid
+inhabitants of some of the lanes and
+back streets of the metropolis, mortified
+at being compelled to consider
+them as my fellow-creatures, as if an
+ape had claimed kindred with me. Or,
+as when surrounded by a mephitical fog,
+I have wished to have a volley of cannon
+fired, to clear the incumbered atmosphere,
+and give me room to breathe
+and move.</p>
+
+<p>"My spirits were all in arms, and I
+played a kind of extemporary prelude.
+The cadence was probably wild and
+impassioned, while, lost in thought, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-74" id="BPg_2-74"></a>[<a href="images/v2-74.png">74</a>]</span>
+made the sounds a kind of echo to my
+train of thinking.</p>
+
+<p>"Pausing for a moment, I met Mr.
+Venables' eyes. He was observing me
+with an air of conceited satisfaction, as
+much as to say&mdash;'My last insinuation
+has done the business&mdash;she begins to
+know her own interest.' Then gathering
+up his letters, he said, 'That
+he hoped he should hear no more romantic
+stuff, well enough in a miss
+just come from boarding school;' and
+went, as was his custom, to the counting-house.
+I still continued playing;
+and, turning to a sprightly lesson, I
+executed it with uncommon vivacity.
+I heard footsteps approach the door,
+and was soon convinced that Mr. Venables
+was listening; the consciousness
+only gave more animation to my
+fingers. He went down into the kit<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-75" id="BPg_2-75"></a>[<a href="images/v2-75.png">75</a>]</span>chen,
+and the cook, probably by his
+desire, came to me, to know what I
+would please to order for dinner. Mr.
+Venables came into the parlour again,
+with apparent carelessness. I perceived
+that the cunning man was over-reaching
+himself; and I gave my directions
+as usual, and left the room.</p>
+
+<p>"While I was making some alteration
+in my dress, Mr. Venables peeped
+in, and, begging my pardon for interrupting
+me, disappeared. I took
+up some work (I could not read), and
+two or three messages were sent to me,
+probably for no other purpose, but to
+enable Mr. Venables to ascertain what
+I was about.</p>
+
+<p>"I listened whenever I heard the
+street-door open; at last I imagined I
+could distinguish Mr. Venables' step,
+going out. I laid aside my work; my<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-76" id="BPg_2-76"></a>[<a href="images/v2-76.png">76</a>]</span>
+heart palpitated; still I was afraid
+hastily to enquire; and I waited a long
+half hour, before I ventured to ask the
+boy whether his master was in the
+counting-house?</p>
+
+<p>"Being answered in the negative,
+I bade him call me a coach, and collecting
+a few necessaries hastily together,
+with a little parcel of letters and
+papers which I had collected the preceding
+evening, I hurried into it, desiring
+the coachman to drive to a distant
+part of the town.</p>
+
+<p>"I almost feared that the coach
+would break down before I got out of
+the street; and, when I turned the
+corner, I seemed to breathe a freer air.
+I was ready to imagine that I was rising
+above the thick atmosphere of earth;
+or I felt, as wearied souls might be sup<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-77" id="BPg_2-77"></a>[<a href="images/v2-77.png">77</a>]</span>posed
+to feel on entering another state
+of existence.</p>
+
+<p>"I stopped at one or two stands of
+coaches to elude pursuit, and then
+drove round the skirts of the town to
+seek for an obscure lodging, where I
+wished to remain concealed, till I could
+avail myself of my uncle's protection.
+I had resolved to assume my own name
+immediately, and openly to avow my
+determination, without any formal vindication,
+the moment I had found a
+home, in which I could rest free from
+the daily alarm of expecting to see
+Mr. Venables enter.</p>
+
+<p>"I looked at several lodgings; but
+finding that I could not, without a reference
+to some acquaintance, who
+might inform my tyrant, get admittance
+into a decent apartment&mdash;men
+have not all this trouble&mdash;I thought of<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-78" id="BPg_2-78"></a>[<a href="images/v2-78.png">78</a>]</span>
+a woman whom I had assisted to furnish
+a little haberdasher's shop, and
+who I knew had a first floor to let.</p>
+
+<p>"I went to her, and though I could
+not persuade her, that the quarrel between
+me and Mr. Venables would
+never be made up, still she agreed to
+conceal me for the present; yet assuring
+me at the same time, shaking her
+head, that, when a woman was once
+married, she must bear every thing.
+Her pale face, on which appeared a
+thousand haggard lines and delving
+wrinkles, produced by what is emphatically
+termed fretting, inforced
+her remark; and I had afterwards an
+opportunity of observing the treatment
+she had to endure, which grizzled her
+into patience. She toiled from morning
+till night; yet her husband would rob
+the till, and take away the money re<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-79" id="BPg_2-79"></a>[<a href="images/v2-79.png">79</a>]</span>served
+for paying bills; and, returning
+home drunk, he would beat her if she
+chanced to offend him, though she had
+a child at the breast.</p>
+
+<p>"These scenes awoke me at night;
+and, in the morning, I heard her, as
+usual, talk to her dear Johnny&mdash;he,
+forsooth, was her master; no slave in
+the West Indies had one more despotic;
+but fortunately she was of the
+true Russian breed of wives.</p>
+
+<p>"My mind, during the few past
+days, seemed, as it were, disengaged
+from my body; but, now the struggle
+was over, I felt very forcibly the effect
+which perturbation of spirits produces
+on a woman in my situation.</p>
+
+<p>"The apprehension of a miscarriage,
+obliged me to confine myself to
+my apartment near a fortnight; but
+I wrote to my uncle's friend for money,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-80" id="BPg_2-80"></a>[<a href="images/v2-80.png">80</a>]</span>
+promising 'to call on him, and explain
+my situation, when I was well enough
+to go out; mean time I earnestly intreated
+him, not to mention my place of
+abode to any one, lest my husband&mdash;such
+the law considered him&mdash;should
+disturb the mind he could not conquer.
+I mentioned my intention of setting out
+for Lisbon, to claim my uncle's protection,
+the moment my health would
+permit.'</p>
+
+<p>"The tranquillity however, which
+I was recovering, was soon interrupted.
+My landlady came up to me one
+day, with eyes swollen with weeping,
+unable to utter what she was commanded
+to say. She declared, 'That
+she was never so miserable in her life;
+that she must appear an ungrateful
+monster; and that she would readily
+go down on her knees to me, to intreat<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-81" id="BPg_2-81"></a>[<a href="images/v2-81.png">81</a>]</span>
+me to forgive her, as she had done to
+her husband to spare her the cruel
+task.' Sobs prevented her from proceeding,
+or answering my impatient
+enquiries, to know what she meant.</p>
+
+<p>"When she became a little more
+composed, she took a newspaper out of
+her pocket, declaring, 'that her heart
+smote her, but what could she do?&mdash;she
+must obey her husband.' I snatched
+the paper from her. An advertisement
+quickly met my eye, purporting,
+that 'Maria Venables had, without
+any assignable cause, absconded from
+her husband; and any person harbouring
+her, was menaced with the utmost
+severity of the law.'</p>
+
+<p>"Perfectly acquainted with Mr.
+Venables' meanness of soul, this step
+did not excite my surprise, and scarcely
+my contempt. Resentment in my<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-82" id="BPg_2-82"></a>[<a href="images/v2-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+breast, never survived love. I bade
+the poor woman, in a kind tone, wipe
+her eyes, and request her husband to
+come up, and speak to me himself.</p>
+
+<p>"My manner awed him. He respected
+a lady, though not a woman;
+and began to mutter out an apology.</p>
+
+<p>"'Mr. Venables was a rich gentleman;
+he wished to oblige me, but he
+had suffered enough by the law already,
+to tremble at the thought;
+besides, for certain, we should come
+together again, and then even I should
+not thank him for being accessary to
+keeping us asunder.&mdash;A husband and
+wife were, God knows, just as one,&mdash;and
+all would come round at last.' He
+uttered a drawling 'Hem!' and then
+with an arch look, added&mdash;'Master
+might have had his little frolics&mdash;but<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-83" id="BPg_2-83"></a>[<a href="images/v2-83.png">83</a>]</span>&mdash;Lord
+bless your heart!&mdash;men would
+be men while the world stands.'</p>
+
+<p>"To argue with this privileged first-born
+of reason, I perceived, would be
+vain. I therefore only requested him to
+let me remain another day at his house,
+while I sought for a lodging; and not
+to inform Mr. Venables that I had ever
+been sheltered there.</p>
+
+<p>"He consented, because he had not
+the courage to refuse a person for whom
+he had an habitual respect; but I heard
+the pent-up choler burst forth in curses,
+when he met his wife, who was waiting
+impatiently at the foot of the stairs,
+to know what effect my expostulations
+would have on him.</p>
+
+<p>"Without wasting any time in the
+fruitless indulgence of vexation, I once
+more set out in search of an abode in<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-84" id="BPg_2-84"></a>[<a href="images/v2-84.png">84</a>]</span>
+which I could hide myself for a few
+weeks.</p>
+
+<p>"Agreeing to pay an exorbitant
+price, I hired an apartment, without
+any reference being required relative
+to my character: indeed, a glance
+at my shape seemed to say, that my
+motive for concealment was sufficiently
+obvious. Thus was I obliged to shroud
+my head in infamy.</p>
+
+<p>"To avoid all danger of detection&mdash;I
+use the appropriate word, my child,
+for I was hunted out like a felon&mdash;I
+determined to take possession of my
+new lodgings that very evening.</p>
+
+<p>"I did not inform my landlady
+where I was going. I knew that she
+had a sincere affection for me, and
+would willingly have run any risk to
+show her gratitude; yet I was fully convinced,
+that a few kind words from<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-85" id="BPg_2-85"></a>[<a href="images/v2-85.png">85</a>]</span>
+Johnny would have found the woman
+in her, and her dear benefactress, as
+she termed me in an agony of tears,
+would have been sacrificed, to recompense
+her tyrant for condescending to
+treat her like an equal. He could be
+kind-hearted, as she expressed it, when
+he pleased. And this thawed sternness,
+contrasted with his habitual brutality,
+was the more acceptable, and
+could not be purchased at too dear a
+rate.</p>
+
+<p>"The sight of the advertisement
+made me desirous of taking refuge with
+my uncle, let what would be the consequence;
+and I repaired in a hackney
+coach (afraid of meeting some person
+who might chance to know me, had I
+walked) to the chambers of my uncle's
+friend.</p>
+
+<p>"He received me with great polite<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-86" id="BPg_2-86"></a>[<a href="images/v2-86.png">86</a>]</span>ness
+(my uncle had already prepossessed
+him in my favour), and listened, with
+interest, to my explanation of the
+motives which had induced me to fly
+from home, and skulk in obscurity,
+with all the timidity of fear that ought
+only to be the companion of guilt. He
+lamented, with rather more gallantry
+than, in my situation, I thought delicate,
+that such a woman should be
+thrown away on a man insensible to the
+charms of beauty or grace. He seemed
+at a loss what to advise me to do, to
+evade my husband's search, without
+hastening to my uncle, whom, he hesitating
+said, I might not find alive. He
+uttered this intelligence with visible
+regret; requested me, at least, to wait
+for the arrival of the next packet; offered
+me what money I wanted, and
+promised to visit me.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-87" id="BPg_2-87"></a>[<a href="images/v2-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+"He kept his word; still no letter
+arrived to put an end to my painful
+state of suspense. I procured some
+books and music, to beguile the tedious
+solitary days.</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">'Come, ever smiling Liberty,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">'And with thee bring thy jocund train:'<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>I sung&mdash;and sung till, saddened by the
+strain of joy, I bitterly lamented the
+fate that deprived me of all social pleasure.
+Comparative liberty indeed I
+had possessed myself of; but the jocund
+train lagged far behind!</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-88" id="BPg_2-88"></a>[<a href="images/v2-88.png">88</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XIII" id="BCHAP_XIII"></a>CHAP. XIII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">By</span> watching my only visitor, my
+uncle's friend, or by some other means,
+Mr. Venables discovered my residence,
+and came to enquire for me. The
+maid-servant assured him there was no
+such person in the house. A bustle
+ensued&mdash;I caught the alarm&mdash;listened&mdash;distinguished
+his voice, and immediately
+locked the door. They suddenly
+grew still; and I waited near a
+quarter of an hour, before I heard him
+open the parlour door, and mount the
+stairs with the mistress of the house,
+who obsequiously declared that she
+knew nothing of me.</p>
+
+<p>"Finding my door locked, she requested
+me to 'open it, and prepare to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-89" id="BPg_2-89"></a>[<a href="images/v2-89.png">89</a>]</span>
+go home with my husband, poor gentleman!
+to whom I had already occasioned
+sufficient vexation.' I made no
+reply. Mr. Venables then, in an assumed
+tone of softness, intreated me,
+'to consider what he suffered, and my
+own reputation, and get the better of
+childish resentment.' He ran on in
+the same strain, pretending to address
+me, but evidently adapting his discourse
+to the capacity of the landlady;
+who, at every pause, uttered an exclamation
+of pity; or 'Yes, to be sure&mdash;Very
+true, sir.'</p>
+
+<p>"Sick of the farce, and perceiving
+that I could not avoid the hated interview,
+I opened the door, and he entered.
+Advancing with easy assurance
+to take my hand, I shrunk from his
+touch, with an involuntary start, as I
+should have done from a noisome reptile,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-90" id="BPg_2-90"></a>[<a href="images/v2-90.png">90</a>]</span>
+with more disgust than terror. His
+conductress was retiring, to give us, as
+she said, an opportunity to accommodate
+matters. But I bade her come in,
+or I would go out; and curiosity impelled
+her to obey me.</p>
+
+<p>"Mr. Venables began to expostulate;
+and this woman, proud of his
+confidence, to second him. But I
+calmly silenced her, in the midst of a
+vulgar harangue, and turning to him,
+asked, 'Why he vainly tormented me?
+declaring that no power on earth
+should force me back to his house.'</p>
+
+<p>"After a long altercation, the particulars
+of which, it would be to no
+purpose to repeat, he left the room.
+Some time was spent in loud conversation
+in the parlour below, and I
+discovered that he had brought his
+friend, an attorney, with him.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-91" id="BPg_2-91"></a>[<a href="images/v2-91.png">91</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p>*&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; The tumult on the landing
+place, brought out a gentleman, who
+had recently taken apartments in the
+house; he enquired why I was thus
+assailed<a name="BFNanchor_91-A_7" id="BFNanchor_91-A_7"></a><a href="#BFootnote_91-A_7" class="fnanchor">[91-A]</a>? The voluble attorney instantly
+repeated the trite tale. The
+stranger turned to me, observing,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-92" id="BPg_2-92"></a>[<a href="images/v2-92.png">92</a>]</span>
+with the most soothing politeness and
+manly interest, that 'my countenance
+told a very different story.' He added,
+'that I should not be insulted, or
+forced out of the house, by any body.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Not by her husband?' asked the
+attorney.</p>
+
+<p>"'No, sir, not by her husband.' Mr.
+Venables advanced towards him&mdash;But
+there was a decision in his attitude,
+that so well seconded that of his voice,</p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p>*&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; They left the house: at
+the same time protesting, that any one
+that should dare to protect me, should
+be prosecuted with the utmost rigour.</p>
+
+<p>"They were scarcely out of the
+house, when my landlady came up to
+me again, and begged my pardon, in
+a very different tone. For, though<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-93" id="BPg_2-93"></a>[<a href="images/v2-93.png">93</a>]</span>
+Mr. Venables had bid her, at her peril,
+harbour me, he had not attended, I
+found, to her broad hints, to discharge
+the lodging. I instantly promised to
+pay her, and make her a present to
+compensate for my abrupt departure,
+if she would procure me another lodging,
+at a sufficient distance; and she, in
+return, repeating Mr. Venables' plausible
+tale, I raised her indignation, and
+excited her sympathy, by telling her
+briefly the truth.</p>
+
+<p>"She expressed her commiseration
+with such honest warmth, that I felt
+soothed; for I have none of that fastidious
+sensitiveness, which a vulgar accent
+or gesture can alarm to the disregard
+of real kindness. I was ever glad
+to perceive in others the humane feelings
+I delighted to exercise; and the
+recollection of some ridiculous charac<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-94" id="BPg_2-94"></a>[<a href="images/v2-94.png">94</a>]</span>teristic
+circumstances, which have occurred
+in a moment of emotion, has
+convulsed me with laughter, though
+at the instant I should have thought it
+sacrilegious to have smiled. Your improvement,
+my dearest girl, being ever
+present to me while I write, I note
+these feelings, because women, more
+accustomed to observe manners than
+actions, are too much alive to ridicule.
+So much so, that their boasted sensibility
+is often stifled by false delicacy.
+True sensibility, the sensibility which
+is the auxiliary of virtue, and the soul
+of genius, is in society so occupied
+with the feelings of others, as scarcely
+to regard its own sensations. With
+what reverence have I looked up at my
+uncle, the dear parent of my mind!
+when I have seen the sense of his own
+sufferings, of mind and body, absorbed<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-95" id="BPg_2-95"></a>[<a href="images/v2-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+in a desire to comfort those, whose misfortunes
+were comparatively trivial.
+He would have been ashamed of being
+as indulgent to himself, as he was to
+others. 'Genuine fortitude,' he would
+assert, 'consisted in governing our own
+emotions, and making allowance for
+the weaknesses in our friends, that we
+would not tolerate in ourselves.' But
+where is my fond regret leading me!</p>
+
+<p>"'Women must be submissive,' said
+my landlady. 'Indeed what could
+most women do? Who had they to
+maintain them, but their husbands?
+Every woman, and especially a lady,
+could not go through rough and
+smooth, as she had done, to earn a little
+bread.'</p>
+
+<p>"She was in a talking mood, and
+proceeded to inform me how she had
+been used in the world. 'She knew<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-96" id="BPg_2-96"></a>[<a href="images/v2-96.png">96</a>]</span>
+what it was to have a bad husband, or
+she did not know who should.' I perceived
+that she would be very much
+mortified, were I not to attend to her
+tale, and I did not attempt to interrupt
+her, though I wished her, as soon
+as possible, to go out in search of a new
+abode for me, where I could once more
+hide my head.</p>
+
+<p>"She began by telling me, 'That
+she had saved a little money in service;
+and was over-persuaded (we must all
+be in love once in our lives) to marry a
+likely man, a footman in the family,
+not worth a groat. My plan,' she continued,
+'was to take a house, and let
+out lodgings; and all went on well,
+till my husband got acquainted with
+an impudent slut, who chose to live on
+other people's means&mdash;and then all
+went to rack and ruin. He ran in<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-97" id="BPg_2-97"></a>[<a href="images/v2-97.png">97</a>]</span>
+debt to buy her fine clothes, such
+clothes as I never thought of wearing
+myself, and&mdash;would you believe it?&mdash;he
+signed an execution on my very
+goods, bought with the money I
+worked so hard to get; and they came
+and took my bed from under me, before
+I heard a word of the matter.
+Aye, madam, these are misfortunes
+that you gentlefolks know nothing of,&mdash;but
+sorrow is sorrow, let it come
+which way it will.</p>
+
+<p>"'I sought for a service again&mdash;very
+hard, after having a house of my own!&mdash;but
+he used to follow me, and kick up
+such a riot when he was drunk, that I
+could not keep a place; nay, he even
+stole my clothes, and pawned them;
+and when I went to the pawnbroker's,
+and offered to take my oath that they
+were not bought with a farthing of his<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-98" id="BPg_2-98"></a>[<a href="images/v2-98.png">98</a>]</span>
+money, they said, 'It was all as one,
+my husband had a right to whatever I
+had.'</p>
+
+<p>"'At last he listed for a soldier, and
+I took a house, making an agreement
+to pay for the furniture by degrees;
+and I almost starved myself, till I once
+more got before-hand in the world.</p>
+
+<p>"'After an absence of six years
+(God forgive me! I thought he was
+dead) my husband returned; found me
+out, and came with such a penitent
+face, I forgave him, and clothed him
+from head to foot. But he had not
+been a week in the house, before some
+of his creditors arrested him; and, he
+selling my goods, I found myself once
+more reduced to beggary; for I was
+not as well able to work, go to bed
+late, and rise early, as when I quitted
+service; and then I thought it hard<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-99" id="BPg_2-99"></a>[<a href="images/v2-99.png">99</a>]</span>
+enough. He was soon tired of me,
+when there was nothing more to be
+had, and left me again.</p>
+
+<p>"<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing quotation mark">'</ins>I will not tell you how I was buffeted
+about, till, hearing for certain
+that he had died in an hospital abroad,
+I once more returned to my old occupation;
+but have not yet been able to
+get my head above water: so, madam,
+you must not be angry if I am afraid to
+run any risk, when I know so well,
+that women have always the worst of
+it, when law is to decide.'</p>
+
+<p>"After uttering a few more complaints,
+I prevailed on my landlady to
+go out in quest of a lodging; and, to
+be more secure, I condescended to the
+mean shift of changing my name.</p>
+
+<p>"But why should I dwell on similar
+incidents!&mdash;I was hunted, like an infected
+beast, from three different apartments,
+and should not have been al<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-100" id="BPg_2-100"></a>[<a href="images/v2-100.png">100</a>]</span>lowed
+to rest in any, had not Mr. Venables,
+informed of my uncle's dangerous
+state of health, been inspired with
+the fear of hurrying me out of the
+world as I advanced in my pregnancy,
+by thus tormenting and obliging me to
+take sudden journeys to avoid him; and
+then his speculations on my uncle's fortune
+must prove abortive.</p>
+
+<p>"One day, when he had pursued me
+to an inn, I fainted, hurrying from him;
+and, falling down, the sight of my blood
+alarmed him, and obtained a respite for
+me. It is strange that he should have
+retained any hope, after observing my
+unwavering determination; but, from
+the mildness of my behaviour, when I
+found all my endeavours to change his
+disposition unavailing, he formed an
+erroneous opinion of my character, imagining
+that, were we once more together,
+I should part with the money he<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-101" id="BPg_2-101"></a>[<a href="images/v2-101.png">101</a>]</span>
+could not legally force from me, with
+the same facility as formerly. My forbearance
+and occasional sympathy he
+had mistaken for weakness of character;
+and, because he perceived that I
+disliked resistance, he thought my indulgence
+and compassion mere selfishness,
+and never discovered that the fear of
+being unjust, or of unnecessarily wounding
+the feelings of another, was much
+more painful to me, than any thing I
+could have to endure myself. Perhaps
+it was pride which made me imagine,
+that I could bear what I dreaded to inflict;
+and that it was often easier to suffer,
+than to see the sufferings of others.</p>
+
+<p>"I forgot to mention that, during
+this persecution, I received a letter
+from my uncle, informing me, 'that
+he only found relief from continual
+change of air; and that he intended to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-102" id="BPg_2-102"></a>[<a href="images/v2-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+return when the spring was a little more
+advanced (it was now the middle of
+February), and then we would plan a
+journey to Italy, leaving the fogs and
+cares of England far behind.' He approved
+of my conduct, promised to
+adopt my child, and seemed to have
+no doubt of obliging Mr. Venables to
+hear reason. He wrote to his friend,
+by the same post, desiring him to call
+on Mr. Venables in his name; and, in
+consequence of the remonstrances he
+dictated, I was permitted to lie-in tranquilly.</p>
+
+<p>"The two or three weeks previous, I
+had been allowed to rest in peace; but,
+so accustomed was I to pursuit and
+alarm, that I seldom closed my eyes
+without being haunted by Mr. Venables'
+image, who seemed to assume terrific or
+hateful forms to torment me, wherever<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-103" id="BPg_2-103"></a>[<a href="images/v2-103.png">103</a>]</span>
+I turned.&mdash;Sometimes a wild cat, a
+roaring bull, or hideous assassin, whom
+I vainly attempted to fly; at others he
+was a demon, hurrying me to the brink
+of a precipice, plunging me into dark
+waves, or horrid gulfs; and I woke,
+in violent fits of trembling anxiety, to
+assure myself that it was all a dream,
+and to endeavour to lure my waking
+thoughts to wander to the delightful
+Italian vales, I hoped soon to visit; or
+to picture some august ruins, where I
+reclined in fancy on a mouldering column,
+and escaped, in the contemplation
+of the heart-enlarging virtues of antiquity,
+from the turmoil of cares that
+had depressed all the daring purposes
+of my soul. But I was not long allowed
+to calm my mind by the exercise
+of my imagination; for the third
+day after your birth, my child, I was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-104" id="BPg_2-104"></a>[<a href="images/v2-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+surprised by a visit from my elder brother;
+who came in the most abrupt
+manner, to inform me of the death of
+my uncle. He had left the greater
+part of his fortune to my child, appointing
+me its guardian; in short,
+every step was taken to enable me to
+be mistress of his fortune, without putting
+any part of it in Mr. Venables'
+power. My brother came to vent his
+rage on me, for having, as he expressed
+himself, 'deprived him, my uncle's
+eldest nephew, of his inheritance;'
+though my uncle's property, the fruit
+of his own exertion, being all in the
+funds, or on landed securities, there
+was not a shadow of justice in the
+charge.</p>
+
+<p>"As I sincerely loved my uncle, this
+intelligence brought on a fever, which
+I struggled to conquer with all the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-105" id="BPg_2-105"></a>[<a href="images/v2-105.png">105</a>]</span>
+energy of my mind; for, in my desolate
+state, I had it very much at heart to
+suckle you, my poor babe. You
+seemed my only tie to life, a cherub,
+to whom I wished to be a father, as
+well as a mother; and the double duty
+appeared to me to produce a proportionate
+increase of affection. But the
+pleasure I felt, while sustaining you,
+snatched from the wreck of hope, was
+cruelly damped by melancholy reflections
+on my widowed state&mdash;widowed
+by the death of my uncle. Of Mr.
+Venables I thought not, even when I
+thought of the felicity of loving your
+father, and how a mother's pleasure
+might be exalted, and her care softened
+by a husband's tenderness.&mdash;'Ought to
+be!' I exclaimed; and I endeavoured
+to drive away the tenderness that suffo<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-106" id="BPg_2-106"></a>[<a href="images/v2-106.png">106</a>]</span>cated
+me; but my spirits were weak,
+and the unbidden tears would flow.
+'Why was I,' I would ask thee, but
+thou didst not heed me,&mdash;'cut off from
+the participation of the sweetest pleasure
+of life?' I imagined with what
+extacy, after the pains of child-bed, I
+should have presented my little stranger,
+whom I had so long wished to view, to
+a respectable father, and with what
+maternal fondness I should have pressed
+them both to my heart!&mdash;Now I kissed
+her with less delight, though with the
+most endearing compassion, poor helpless
+one! when I perceived a slight resemblance
+of him, to whom she owed
+her existence; or, if any gesture reminded
+me of him, even in his best
+days, my heart heaved, and I pressed
+the innocent to my bosom, as if to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-107" id="BPg_2-107"></a>[<a href="images/v2-107.png">107</a>]</span>
+purify it&mdash;yes, I blushed to think that
+its purity had been sullied, by allowing
+such a man to be its father.</p>
+
+<p>"After my recovery, I began to
+think of taking a house in the country,
+or of making an excursion on the continent,
+to avoid Mr. Venables; and to
+open my heart to new pleasures and
+affection. The spring was melting into
+summer, and you, my little companion,
+began to smile&mdash;that smile
+made hope bud out afresh, assuring me
+the world was not a desert. Your
+gestures were ever present to my
+fancy; and I dwelt on the joy I should
+feel when you would begin to walk and
+lisp. Watching your wakening mind,
+and shielding from every rude blast
+my tender blossom, I recovered my
+spirits&mdash;I dreamed not of the frost<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-108" id="BPg_2-108"></a>[<a href="images/v2-108.png">108</a>]</span>&mdash;'the
+killing frost,' to which you were
+destined to be exposed.&mdash;But I lose all
+patience&mdash;and execrate the injustice
+of the world&mdash;folly! ignorance!&mdash;I
+should rather call it; but, shut up from
+a free circulation of thought, and always
+pondering on the same griefs, I
+writhe under the torturing apprehensions,
+which ought to excite only
+honest indignation, or active compassion;
+and would, could I view them
+as the natural consequence of things.
+But, born a woman&mdash;and born to suffer,
+in endeavouring to repress my own
+emotions, I feel more acutely the various
+ills my sex are fated to bear&mdash;I
+feel that the evils they are subject to
+endure, degrade them so far below
+their oppressors, as almost to justify
+their tyranny; leading at the same<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-109" id="BPg_2-109"></a>[<a href="images/v2-109.png">109</a>]</span>
+time superficial reasoners to term that
+weakness the cause, which is only
+the consequence of short-sighted despotism.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_91-A_7" id="BFootnote_91-A_7"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_91-A_7"><span class="label">[91-A]</span></a> The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer
+of Maria, in an early stage of the history, is already
+stated (Chap. III.) to have been an after-thought
+of the author. This has probably caused
+the imperfectness of the manuscript in the above
+passage; though, at the same time, it must be acknowledged
+to be somewhat uncertain, whether
+Darnford is the stranger intended in this place.
+It appears from Chap. XVII. that an interference
+of a more decisive nature was designed to be attributed
+to him.</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-110" id="BPg_2-110"></a>[<a href="images/v2-110.png">110</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XIV" id="BCHAP_XIV"></a>CHAP. XIV.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">As</span> my mind grew calmer, the
+visions of Italy again returned with
+their former glow of colouring; and I
+resolved on quitting the kingdom for
+a time, in search of the cheerfulness,
+that naturally results from a change of
+scene, unless we carry the barbed arrow
+with us, and only see what we
+feel.</p>
+
+<p>"During the period necessary to
+prepare for a long absence, I sent a
+supply to pay my father's debts, and
+settled my brothers in eligible situations;
+but my attention was not
+wholly engrossed by my family, though
+I do not think it necessary to enumerate
+the common exertions of huma<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-111" id="BPg_2-111"></a>[<a href="images/v2-111.png">111</a>]</span>nity.
+The manner in which my uncle's
+property was settled, prevented
+me from making the addition to the
+fortune of my surviving sister, that I
+could have wished; but I had prevailed
+on him to bequeath her two
+thousand pounds, and she determined
+to marry a lover, to whom she had
+been some time attached. Had it not
+been for this engagement, I should have
+invited her to accompany me in my
+tour; and I might have escaped the
+pit, so artfully dug in my path, when
+I was the least aware of danger.</p>
+
+<p>"I had thought of remaining in
+England, till I weaned my child; but
+this state of freedom was too peaceful
+to last, and I had soon reason to wish
+to hasten my departure. A friend of
+Mr. Venables, the same attorney who
+had accompanied him in several excur<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-112" id="BPg_2-112"></a>[<a href="images/v2-112.png">112</a>]</span>sions
+to hunt me from my hiding places,
+waited on me to propose a reconciliation.
+On my refusal, he indirectly
+advised me to make over to my husband&mdash;for
+husband he would term
+him&mdash;the greater part of the property
+I had at command, menacing me with
+continual persecution unless I complied,
+and that, as a last resort, he
+would claim the child. I did not,
+though intimidated by the last insinuation,
+scruple to declare, that I would
+not allow him to squander the money
+left to me for far different purposes,
+but offered him five hundred pounds, if
+he would sign a bond not to torment
+me any more. My maternal anxiety
+made me thus appear to waver from
+my first determination, and probably
+suggested to him, or his diabolical<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-113" id="BPg_2-113"></a>[<a href="images/v2-113.png">113</a>]</span>
+agent, the infernal plot, which has
+succeeded but too well.</p>
+
+<p>"The bond was executed; still I
+was impatient to leave England. Mischief
+hung in the air when we breathed
+the same; I wanted seas to divide
+us, and waters to roll between, till he
+had forgotten that I had the means of
+helping him through a new scheme.
+Disturbed by the late occurrences, I instantly
+prepared for my departure.
+My only delay was waiting for a maid-servant,
+who spoke French fluently,
+and had been warmly recommended to
+me. A valet I was advised to hire,
+when I fixed on my place of residence
+for any time.</p>
+
+<p>"My God, with what a light heart
+did I set out for Dover!&mdash;It was not my
+country, but my cares, that I was leaving
+behind. My heart seemed to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-114" id="BPg_2-114"></a>[<a href="images/v2-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+bound with the wheels, or rather appeared
+the centre on which they twirled.
+I clasped you to my bosom, exclaiming
+'And you will be safe&mdash;quite
+safe&mdash;when&mdash;we are once on
+board the packet.&mdash;Would we were
+there!' I smiled at my idle fears, as
+the natural effect of continual alarm;
+and I scarcely owned to myself that I
+dreaded Mr. Venables's cunning, or
+was conscious of the horrid delight he
+would feel, at forming stratagem after
+stratagem to circumvent me. I was
+already in the snare&mdash;I never reached
+the packet&mdash;I never saw thee more.&mdash;I
+grow breathless. I have scarcely patience
+to write down the details. The
+maid&mdash;the plausible woman I had
+hired&mdash;put, doubtless, some stupifying
+potion in what I ate or drank, the
+morning I left town. All I know is,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-115" id="BPg_2-115"></a>[<a href="images/v2-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+that she must have quitted the chaise,
+shameless wretch! and taken (from
+my breast) my babe with her. How
+could a creature in a female form see
+me caress thee, and steal thee from my
+arms! I must stop, stop to repress a
+mother's anguish; left, in bitterness of
+soul, I imprecate the wrath of heaven
+on this tiger, who tore my only comfort
+from me.</p>
+
+<p>"How long I slept I know not;
+certainly many hours, for I woke at the
+close of day, in a strange confusion of
+thought. I was probably roused to recollection
+by some one thundering at a
+huge, unwieldy gate. Attempting to
+ask where I was, my voice died away,
+and I tried to raise it in vain, as I have
+done in a dream. I looked for my babe
+with affright; feared that it had fallen
+out of my lap, while I had so strange<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-116" id="BPg_2-116"></a>[<a href="images/v2-116.png">116</a>]</span>ly
+forgotten her; and, such was the
+vague intoxication, I can give it no
+other name, in which I was plunged,
+I could not recollect when or where I
+last saw you; but I sighed, as if my
+heart wanted room to clear my head.</p>
+
+<p>"The gates opened heavily, and
+the sullen sound of many locks
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'and and'">and</ins> bolts drawn back, grated on
+my very soul, before I was appalled by
+the creeking of the dismal hinges, as
+they closed after me. The gloomy
+pile was before me, half in ruins; some
+of the aged trees of the avenue were
+cut down, and left to rot where they
+fell; and as we approached some
+mouldering steps, a monstrous dog
+darted forwards to the length of his
+chain, and barked and growled infernally.</p>
+
+<p>"The door was opened slowly, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-117" id="BPg_2-117"></a>[<a href="images/v2-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+a murderous visage peeped out, with a
+lantern. 'Hush!' he uttered, in a
+threatning tone, and the affrighted
+animal stole back to his kennel. The
+door of the chaise flew back, the
+stranger put down the lantern, and
+clasped his dreadful arms around me.
+It was certainly the effect of the soporific
+draught, for, instead of exerting
+my strength, I sunk without motion,
+though not without sense, on his shoulder,
+my limbs refusing to obey my
+will. I was carried up the steps into a
+close-shut hall. A candle flaring in
+the socket, scarcely dispersed the darkness,
+though it displayed to me the
+ferocious countenance of the wretch
+who held me.</p>
+
+<p>"He mounted a wide staircase.
+Large figures painted on the walls
+seemed to start on me, and glaring<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-118" id="BPg_2-118"></a>[<a href="images/v2-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+eyes to meet me at every turn. Entering
+a long gallery, a dismal shriek made
+me spring out of my conductor's arms,
+with I know not what mysterious emotion
+of terror; but I fell on the floor,
+unable to sustain myself.</p>
+
+<p>"A strange-looking female started
+out of one of the recesses, and observed
+me with more curiosity than interest;
+till, sternly bid retire, she flitted back
+like a shadow. Other faces, strongly
+marked, or distorted, peeped through
+the half-opened doors, and I heard
+some incoherent sounds. I had no
+distinct idea where I could be&mdash;I looked
+on all sides, and almost doubted whether
+I was alive or dead.</p>
+
+<p>"Thrown on a bed, I immediately
+sunk into insensibility again; and next
+day, gradually recovering the use of
+reason, I began, starting affrighted<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-119" id="BPg_2-119"></a>[<a href="images/v2-119.png">119</a>]</span>
+from the conviction, to discover where
+I was confined&mdash;I insisted on seeing the
+master of the mansion&mdash;I saw him&mdash;and
+perceived that I was buried alive.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>"Such, my child, are the events of
+thy mother's life to this dreadful moment&mdash;Should
+she ever escape from
+the fangs of her enemies, she will add
+the secrets of her prison-house&mdash;and&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>Some lines were here crossed out,
+and the memoirs broke off abruptly
+with the names of Jemima and Darnford.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-120" id="BPg_2-120"></a>[<a href="images/v2-120.png">120</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BAPPENDIX" id="BAPPENDIX"></a>APPENDIX.</h2>
+<hr class="short" />
+<h3>[ADVERTISEMENT.</h3>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> performance, with a fragment
+of which the reader has now been presented,
+was designed to consist of three
+parts. The preceding sheets were
+considered as constituting one of those
+parts. Those persons who in the
+perusal of the chapters, already written
+and in some degree finished by the au<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-121" id="BPg_2-121"></a>[<a href="images/v2-121.png">121</a>]</span>thor,
+have felt their hearts awakened,
+and their curiosity excited as to the
+sequel of the story, will, of course,
+gladly accept even of the broken paragraphs
+and half-finished sentences,
+which have been found committed
+to paper, as materials for the
+remainder. The fastidious and cold-hearted
+critic may perhaps feel himself
+repelled by the incoherent form in
+which they are presented. But an inquisitive
+temper willingly accepts the
+most imperfect and mutilated information,
+where better is not to be had:
+and readers, who in any degree resemble
+the author in her quick apprehension
+of sentiment, and of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-122" id="BPg_2-122"></a>[<a href="images/v2-122.png">122</a>]</span>
+pleasures and pains of imagination,
+will, I believe, find gratification, in
+contemplating sketches, which were
+designed in a short time to have received
+the finishing touches of her
+genius; but which must now for ever
+remain a mark to record the triumphs
+of mortality, over schemes of usefulness,
+and projects of public interest.]</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-123" id="BPg_2-123"></a>[<a href="images/v2-123.png">123</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XV" id="BCHAP_XV"></a>CHAP. XV.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Darnford</span> returned the memoirs
+to Maria, with a most affectionate
+letter, in which he reasoned on "the
+absurdity of the laws respecting matrimony,
+which, till divorces could be
+more easily obtained, was," he declared,
+"the most insufferable bondage. Ties of
+this nature could not bind minds governed
+by superior principles; and such
+beings were privileged to act above the
+dictates of laws they had no voice in
+framing, if they had sufficient strength
+of mind to endure the natural consequence.
+In her case, to talk of duty,
+was a farce, excepting what was due
+to herself. Delicacy, as well as reason,
+forbade her ever to think of returning<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-124" id="BPg_2-124"></a>[<a href="images/v2-124.png">124</a>]</span>
+to her husband: was she then to restrain
+her charming sensibility through
+mere prejudice? These arguments
+were not absolutely impartial, for he
+disdained to conceal, that, when he
+appealed to her reason, he felt that
+he had some interest in her heart.&mdash;The
+conviction was not more transporting,
+than sacred&mdash;a thousand times a
+day, he asked himself how he had merited
+such happiness?&mdash;and as often he
+determined to purify the heart she
+deigned to inhabit&mdash;He intreated to be
+again admitted to her presence."</p>
+
+<p>He was; and the tear which glistened
+in his eye, when he respectfully
+pressed her to his bosom, rendered him
+peculiarly dear to the unfortunate mother.
+Grief had stilled the transports
+of love, only to render their mutual
+tenderness more touching. In former<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-125" id="BPg_2-125"></a>[<a href="images/v2-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+interviews, Darnford had contrived, by
+a hundred little pretexts, to sit near
+her, to take her hand, or to meet her
+eyes&mdash;now it was all soothing affection,
+and esteem seemed to have rivalled
+love. He adverted to her narrative,
+and spoke with warmth of the oppression
+she had endured.&mdash;His eyes, glowing
+with a lambent flame, told her
+how much he wished to restore her to
+liberty and love; but he kissed her
+hand, as if it had been that of a saint;
+and spoke of the loss of her child, as if it
+had been his own.&mdash;What could have
+been more flattering to Maria?&mdash;Every
+instance of self-denial was registered in
+her heart, and she loved him, for loving
+her too well to give way to the
+transports of passion.</p>
+
+<p>They met again and again; and
+Darnford declared, while passion suf<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-126" id="BPg_2-126"></a>[<a href="images/v2-126.png">126</a>]</span>fused
+his cheeks, that he never before
+knew what it was to love.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>One morning Jemima informed
+Maria, that her master intended to
+wait on her, and speak to her without
+witnesses. He came, and brought a
+letter with him, pretending that he
+was ignorant of its contents, though he
+insisted on having it returned to him.
+It was from the attorney already mentioned,
+who informed her of the death
+of her child, and hinted, "that she
+could not now have a legitimate heir,
+and that, would she make over the
+half of her fortune during life, she
+should be conveyed to Dover, and permitted
+to pursue her plan of travelling."</p>
+
+<p>Maria answered with warmth,
+"That she had no terms to make with
+the murderer of her babe, nor would<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-127" id="BPg_2-127"></a>[<a href="images/v2-127.png">127</a>]</span>
+she purchase liberty at the price of her
+own respect."</p>
+
+<p>She began to expostulate with her
+jailor; but he sternly bade her "Be
+silent&mdash;he had not gone so far, not to
+go further."</p>
+
+<p>Darnford came in the evening.
+Jemima was obliged to be absent, and
+she, as usual, locked the door on them,
+to prevent interruption or discovery.&mdash;The
+lovers were, at first, embarrassed;
+but fell insensibly into confidential discourse.
+Darnford represented, "that
+they might soon be parted," and wished
+her "to put it out of the power of fate
+to separate them."</p>
+
+<p>As her husband she now received him,
+and he solemnly pledged himself as her
+protector&mdash;and eternal friend.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>There was one peculiarity in Maria's
+mind: she was more anxious not
+to deceive, than to guard against de<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-128" id="BPg_2-128"></a>[<a href="images/v2-128.png">128</a>]</span>ception;
+and had rather trust without
+sufficient reason, than be for ever the
+prey of doubt. Besides, what are we,
+when the mind has, from reflection, a
+certain kind of elevation, which exalts
+the contemplation above the little concerns
+of prudence! We see what we
+wish, and make a world of our own&mdash;and,
+though reality may sometimes open
+a door to misery, yet the moments of
+happiness procured by the imagination,
+may, without a paradox, be reckoned
+among the solid comforts of life. Maria
+now, imagining that she had found
+a being of celestial mould&mdash;was happy,&mdash;nor
+was she deceived.&mdash;He was then
+plastic in her impassioned hand&mdash;and
+reflected all the sentiments which animated
+and warmed her.&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-129" id="BPg_2-129"></a>[<a href="images/v2-129.png">129</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XVI" id="BCHAP_XVI"></a>CHAP. XVI.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">One</span> morning confusion seemed to
+reign in the house, and Jemima came
+in terror, to inform Maria, "that her
+master had left it, with a determination,
+she was assured (and too many
+circumstances corroborated the opinion,
+to leave a doubt of its truth) of never
+returning. I am prepared then,"
+said Jemima, "to accompany you in
+your flight."</p>
+
+<p>Maria started up, her eyes darting
+towards the door, as if afraid that some
+one should fasten it on her for ever.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima continued, "I have perhaps
+no right now to expect the performance
+of your promise; but on you<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-130" id="BPg_2-130"></a>[<a href="images/v2-130.png">130</a>]</span>
+it depends to reconcile me with the
+human race."</p>
+
+<p>"But Darnford!"&mdash;exclaimed Maria,
+mournfully&mdash;sitting down again,
+and crossing her arms&mdash;"I have no
+child to go to, and liberty has lost its
+sweets."</p>
+
+<p>"I am much mistaken, if Darnford
+is not the cause of my master's flight&mdash;his
+keepers assure me, that they have
+promised to confine him two days
+longer, and then he will be free&mdash;you
+cannot see him; but they will give a
+letter to him the moment he is free.&mdash;In
+that inform him where he may find
+you in London; fix on some hotel.
+Give me your clothes; I will send them
+out of the house with mine, and we
+will slip out at the garden-gate. Write
+your letter while I make these arrangements,
+but lose no time!"</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-131" id="BPg_2-131"></a>[<a href="images/v2-131.png">131</a>]</span>
+In an agitation of spirit, not to be
+calmed, Maria began to write to Darnford.
+She called him by the sacred
+name of "husband," and bade him "hasten
+to her, to share her fortune, or she
+would return to him."&mdash;An hotel in the
+Adelphi was the place of rendezvous.</p>
+
+<p>The letter was sealed and given in
+charge; and with light footsteps, yet
+terrified at the sound of them, she descended,
+scarcely breathing, and with
+an indistinct fear that she should never
+get out at the garden gate. Jemima
+went first.</p>
+
+<p>A being, with a visage that would
+have suited one possessed by a devil,
+crossed the path, and seized Maria by
+the arm. Maria had no fear but of being
+detained&mdash;"Who are you? what
+are you?" for the form was scarcely human.
+"If you are made of flesh and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-132" id="BPg_2-132"></a>[<a href="images/v2-132.png">132</a>]</span>
+blood," his ghastly eyes glared on her,
+"do not stop me!"</p>
+
+<p>"Woman," interrupted a sepulchral
+voice, "what have I to do with thee?"&mdash;Still
+he grasped her hand, muttering
+a curse.</p>
+
+<p>"No, no; you have nothing to do
+with me," she exclaimed, "this is a
+moment of life and death!"&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>With supernatural force she broke
+from him, and, throwing her arms
+round Jemima, cried, "Save me!" The
+being, from whose grasp she had loosed
+herself, took up a stone as they opened
+the door, and with a kind of hellish
+sport threw it after them. They were
+out of his reach.</p>
+
+<p>When Maria arrived in town, she
+drove to the hotel already fixed on. But
+she could not sit still&mdash;her child was ever
+before her; and all that had passed dur<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-133" id="BPg_2-133"></a>[<a href="images/v2-133.png">133</a>]</span>ing
+her confinement, appeared to be a
+dream. She went to the house in the
+suburbs, where, as she now discovered,
+her babe had been sent. The moment
+she entered, her heart grew sick; but
+she wondered not that it had proved its
+grave. She made the necessary enquiries,
+and the church-yard was pointed
+out, in which it rested under a turf. A
+little frock which the nurse's child
+wore (Maria had made it herself)
+caught her eye. The nurse was glad
+to sell it for half-a-guinea, and Maria
+hastened away with the relic, and, re-entering
+the hackney-coach which
+waited for her, gazed on it, till she
+reached her hotel.</p>
+
+<p>She then waited on the attorney
+who had made her uncle's will, and explained
+to him her situation. He readily
+advanced her some of the money<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-134" id="BPg_2-134"></a>[<a href="images/v2-134.png">134</a>]</span>
+which still remained in his hands, and
+promised to take the whole of the case
+into consideration. Maria only wished
+to be permitted to remain in quiet&mdash;She
+found that several bills, apparently
+with her signature, had been presented
+to her agent, nor was she for a moment
+at a loss to guess by whom they had
+been forged; yet, equally averse to
+threaten or intreat, she requested her
+friend [the solicitor] to call on Mr. Venables.
+He was not to be found at
+home; but at length his agent, the attorney,
+offered a conditional promise to
+Maria, to leave her in peace, as long as
+she behaved with propriety, if she
+would give up the notes. Maria inconsiderately
+consented&mdash;Darnford was
+arrived, and she wished to be only alive
+to love; she wished to forget the anguish
+she felt whenever she thought of
+her child.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-135" id="BPg_2-135"></a>[<a href="images/v2-135.png">135</a>]</span>
+They took a ready furnished lodging
+together, for she was above disguise;
+Jemima insisting on being considered
+as her house-keeper, and to receive
+the customary stipend. On no
+other terms would she remain with her
+friend.</p>
+
+<p>Darnford was indefatigable in tracing
+the mysterious circumstances of
+his confinement. The cause was simply,
+that a relation, a very distant one,
+to whom he was heir, had died intestate,
+leaving a considerable fortune.
+On the news of Darnford's arrival [in
+England, a person, intrusted with the
+management of the property, and who
+had the writings in his possession, determining,
+by one bold stroke, to strip
+Darnford of the succession,] had planned
+his confinement; and [as soon
+as he had taken the measures he<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-136" id="BPg_2-136"></a>[<a href="images/v2-136.png">136</a>]</span>
+judged most conducive to his object,
+this ruffian, together with his instrument,]
+the keeper of the private mad-house,
+left the kingdom. Darnford,
+who still pursued his enquiries, at last
+discovered that they had fixed their
+place of refuge at Paris.</p>
+
+<p>Maria and he determined therefore,
+with the faithful Jemima, to visit
+that metropolis, and accordingly were
+preparing for the journey, when they
+were informed that Mr. Venables had
+commenced an action against Darnford
+for seduction and adultery. The indignation
+Maria felt cannot be explained;
+she repented of the forbearance she had
+exercised in giving up the notes. Darnford
+could not put off his journey, without
+risking the loss of his property:
+Maria therefore furnished him with money
+for his expedition; and determined<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-137" id="BPg_2-137"></a>[<a href="images/v2-137.png">137</a>]</span>
+to remain in London till the termination
+of this affair.</p>
+
+<p>She visited some ladies with whom
+she had formerly been intimate, but
+was refused admittance; and at the
+opera, or Ranelagh, they could not recollect
+her. Among these ladies there
+were some, not her most intimate acquaintance,
+who were generally supposed
+to avail themselves of the cloke
+of marriage, to conceal a mode of conduct,
+that would for ever have damned
+their fame, had they been innocent, seduced
+girls. These particularly stood
+aloof.&mdash;Had she remained with her husband,
+practising insincerity, and neglecting
+her child to manage an intrigue,
+she would still have been visited
+and respected. If, instead of
+openly living with her lover, she could
+have condescended to call into play a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-138" id="BPg_2-138"></a>[<a href="images/v2-138.png">138</a>]</span>
+thousand arts, which, degrading her
+own mind, might have allowed the
+people who were not deceived, to pretend
+to be so, she would have been
+caressed and treated like an honourable
+woman. "And Brutus<a name="BFNanchor_138-A_8" id="BFNanchor_138-A_8"></a><a href="#BFootnote_138-A_8" class="fnanchor">[138-A]</a> is an honourable
+man!" said Mark-Antony with
+equal sincerity.</p>
+
+<p>With Darnford she did not taste uninterrupted
+felicity; there was a volatility
+in his manner which often distressed
+her; but love gladdened the
+scene; besides, he was the most tender,
+sympathizing creature in the world.
+A fondness for the sex often gives an
+appearance of humanity to the behaviour
+of men, who have small pretensions
+to the reality; and they seem to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-139" id="BPg_2-139"></a>[<a href="images/v2-139.png">139</a>]</span>
+love others, when they are only pursuing
+their own gratification. Darnford
+appeared ever willing to avail himself
+of her taste and acquirements, while
+she endeavoured to profit by his decision
+of character, and to eradicate some
+of the romantic notions, which had
+taken root in her mind, while in adversity
+she had brooded over visions of
+unattainable bliss.</p>
+
+<p>The real affections of life, when
+they are allowed to burst forth, are buds
+pregnant with joy and all the sweet
+emotions of the soul; yet they branch
+out with wild ease, unlike the artificial
+forms of felicity, sketched by an imagination
+painful alive. The substantial
+happiness, which enlarges and civilizes
+the mind, may be compared to
+the pleasure experienced in roving
+through nature at large, inhaling the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-140" id="BPg_2-140"></a>[<a href="images/v2-140.png">140</a>]</span>
+sweet gale natural to the clime; while
+the reveries of a feverish imagination
+continually sport themselves in gardens
+full of aromatic shrubs, which cloy
+while they delight, and weaken the
+sense of pleasure they gratify. The heaven
+of fancy, below or beyond the stars,
+in this life, or in those ever-smiling regions
+surrounded by the unmarked
+ocean of futurity, have an insipid uniformity
+which palls. Poets have imagined
+scenes of bliss; but, fencing out
+sorrow, all the extatic emotions of the
+soul, and even its grandeur, seem to
+be equally excluded. We dose over
+the unruffled lake, and long to scale
+the rocks which fence the happy valley
+of contentment, though serpents hiss
+in the pathless desert, and danger lurks
+in the unexplored wiles. Maria found
+herself more indulgent as she was hap<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-141" id="BPg_2-141"></a>[<a href="images/v2-141.png">141</a>]</span>pier,
+and discovered virtues, in characters
+she had before disregarded, while
+chasing the phantoms of elegance and
+excellence, which sported in the meteors
+that exhale in the marshes of misfortune.
+The heart is often shut by
+romance against social pleasure; and,
+fostering a sickly sensibility, grows callous
+to the soft touches of humanity.</p>
+
+<p>To part with Darnford was indeed
+cruel.&mdash;It was to feel most painfully
+alone; but she rejoiced to think, that
+she should spare him the care and perplexity
+of the suit, and meet him again,
+all his own. Marriage, as at present
+constituted, she considered as leading
+to immorality&mdash;yet, as the odium of
+society impedes usefulness, she wished to
+avow her affection to Darnford, by becoming
+his wife according to established
+rules; not to be confounded<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-142" id="BPg_2-142"></a>[<a href="images/v2-142.png">142</a>]</span>
+with women who act from very different
+motives, though her conduct would
+be just the same without the ceremony
+as with it, and her expectations from
+him not less firm. The being summoned
+to defend herself from a charge which
+she was determined to plead guilty to,
+was still galling, as it roused bitter reflections
+on the situation of women in
+society.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_138-A_8" id="BFootnote_138-A_8"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_138-A_8"><span class="label">[138-A]</span></a> The name in the manuscript is by mistake
+written C&aelig;sar.</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-143" id="BPg_2-143"></a>[<a href="images/v2-143.png">143</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XVII" id="BCHAP_XVII"></a>CHAP. XVII.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Such</span> was her state of mind when
+the dogs of law were let loose on
+her. Maria took the task of conducting
+Darnford's defence upon herself.
+She instructed his counsel to plead
+guilty to the charge of adultery; but
+to deny that of seduction.</p>
+
+<p>The counsel for the plaintiff opened
+the cause, by observing, "that his client
+had ever been an indulgent husband,
+and had borne with several defects
+of temper, while he had nothing
+criminal to lay to the charge of his
+wife. But that she left his house without
+assigning any cause. He could not
+assert that she was then acquainted
+with the defendant; yet, when he was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-144" id="BPg_2-144"></a>[<a href="images/v2-144.png">144</a>]</span>
+once endeavouring to bring her back
+to her home, this man put the peace-officers
+to flight, and took her he knew
+not whither. After the birth of her child,
+her conduct was so strange, and a melancholy
+malady having afflicted one of
+the family, which delicacy forbade the
+dwelling on, it was necessary to confine
+her. By some means the defendant
+enabled her to make her escape,
+and they had lived together, in despite
+of all sense of order and decorum. The
+adultery was allowed, it was not necessary
+to bring any witnesses to prove it;
+but the seduction, though highly probable
+from the circumstances which
+he had the honour to state, could not
+be so clearly proved.&mdash;It was of the
+most atrocious kind, as decency was set
+at defiance, and respect for reputa<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-145" id="BPg_2-145"></a>[<a href="images/v2-145.png">145</a>]</span>tion,
+which shows internal compunction,
+utterly disregarded."</p>
+
+<p>A strong sense of injustice had silenced
+every emotion, which a mixture
+of true and false delicacy might otherwise
+have excited in Maria's bosom.
+She only felt in earnest to insist on the
+privilege of her nature. The sarcasms
+of society, and the condemnation of a
+mistaken world, were nothing to her,
+compared with acting contrary to those
+feelings which were the foundation of
+her principles. [She therefore eagerly
+put herself forward, instead of desiring
+to be absent, on this memorable occasion.]</p>
+
+<p>Convinced that the subterfuges of
+the law were disgraceful, she wrote a
+paper, which she expressly desired might
+be read in court:</p>
+
+<p>"Married when scarcely able to dis<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-146" id="BPg_2-146"></a>[<a href="images/v2-146.png">146</a>]</span>tinguish
+the nature of the engagement,
+I yet submitted to the rigid
+laws which enslave women, and obeyed
+the man whom I could no longer love.
+Whether the duties of the state are
+reciprocal, I mean not to discuss; but
+I can prove repeated infidelities which
+I overlooked or pardoned. Witnesses
+are not wanting to establish these facts.
+I at present maintain the child of a
+maid servant, sworn to him, and born
+after our marriage. I am ready to allow,
+that education and circumstances
+lead men to think and act with less delicacy,
+than the preservation of order
+in society demands from women; but
+surely I may without assumption declare,
+that, though I could excuse the
+birth, I could not the desertion of this
+unfortunate babe:&mdash;and, while I despised
+the man, it was not easy to ve<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-147" id="BPg_2-147"></a>[<a href="images/v2-147.png">147</a>]</span>nerate
+the husband. With proper restrictions
+however, I revere the institution
+which fraternizes the world. I exclaim
+against the laws which throw the
+whole weight of the yoke on the weaker
+shoulders, and force women, when they
+claim protectorship as mothers, to sign
+a contract, which renders them dependent
+on the caprice of the tyrant, whom
+choice or necessity has appointed to
+reign over them. Various are the cases,
+in which a woman ought to separate
+herself from her husband; and mine,
+I may be allowed emphatically to insist,
+comes under the description of the
+most aggravated.</p>
+
+<p>"I will not enlarge on those provocations
+which only the individual can
+estimate; but will bring forward such
+charges only, the truth of which is an
+insult upon humanity. In order to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-148" id="BPg_2-148"></a>[<a href="images/v2-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+promote certain destructive speculations,
+Mr. Venables prevailed on me
+to borrow certain sums of a wealthy relation;
+and, when I refused further
+compliance, he thought of bartering
+my person; and not only allowed opportunities
+to, but urged, a friend
+from whom he borrowed money, to
+seduce me. On the discovery of this
+act of atrocity, I determined to leave
+him, and in the most decided manner,
+for ever. I consider all obligation as
+made void by his conduct; and hold,
+that schisms which proceed from want
+of principles, can never be healed.</p>
+
+<p>"He received a fortune with me to
+the amount of five thousand pounds. On
+the death of my uncle, convinced that
+I could provide for my child, I destroyed
+the settlement of that fortune.
+I required none of my property to be<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-149" id="BPg_2-149"></a>[<a href="images/v2-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+returned to me, nor shall enumerate the
+sums extorted from me during six years
+that we lived together.</p>
+
+<p>"After leaving, what the law considers
+as my home, I was hunted like a criminal
+from place to place, though I
+contracted no debts, and demanded no
+maintenance&mdash;yet, as the laws sanction
+such proceeding, and make women the
+property of their husbands, I forbear
+to animadvert. After the birth of my
+daughter, and the death of my uncle,
+who left a very considerable property
+to myself and child, I was exposed to
+new persecution; and, because I had,
+before arriving at what is termed years
+of discretion, pledged my faith, I was
+treated by the world, as bound for ever
+to a man whose vices were notorious.
+Yet what are the vices generally
+known, to the various miseries that a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-150" id="BPg_2-150"></a>[<a href="images/v2-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+woman may be subject to, which,
+though deeply felt, eating into the
+soul, elude description, and may be
+glossed over! A false morality is even
+established, which makes all the virtue
+of women consist in chastity, submission,
+and the forgiveness of injuries.</p>
+
+<p>"I pardon my oppressor&mdash;bitterly as I
+lament the loss of my child, torn from
+me in the most violent manner. But
+nature revolts, and my soul sickens at
+the bare supposition, that it could ever
+be a duty to pretend affection, when a
+separation is necessary to prevent my
+feeling hourly aversion.</p>
+
+<p>"To force me to give my fortune, I
+was imprisoned&mdash;yes; in a private mad-house.&mdash;There,
+in the heart of misery,
+I met the man charged with seducing
+me. We became attached&mdash;I deemed,
+and ever shall deem, myself free. The<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-151" id="BPg_2-151"></a>[<a href="images/v2-151.png">151</a>]</span>
+death of my babe dissolved the only tie
+which subsisted between me and my,
+what is termed, lawful husband.</p>
+
+<p>"To this person, thus encountered,
+I voluntarily gave myself, never considering
+myself as any more bound to
+transgress the laws of moral purity,
+because the will of my husband
+might be pleaded in my excuse, than
+to transgress those laws to which
+[the policy of artificial society has]
+annexed [positive] punishments.&mdash;&mdash;While
+no command of a husband can
+prevent a woman from suffering for
+certain crimes, she must be allowed
+to consult her conscience, and regulate
+her conduct, in some degree, by her
+own sense of right. The respect I owe
+to myself, demanded my strict adherence
+to my determination of never
+viewing Mr. Venables in the light of a
+husband, nor could it forbid me from<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-152" id="BPg_2-152"></a>[<a href="images/v2-152.png">152</a>]</span>
+encouraging another. If I am unfortunately
+united to an unprincipled man,
+am I for ever to be shut out from fulfilling
+the duties of a wife and mother?&mdash;I
+wish my country to approve of my
+conduct; but, if laws exist, made by
+the strong to oppress the weak, I appeal
+to my own sense of justice, and
+declare that I will not live with the
+individual, who has violated every moral
+obligation which binds man to man.</p>
+
+<p>"I protest equally against any charge
+being brought to criminate the man,
+whom I consider as my husband. I
+was six-and-twenty when I left Mr.
+Venables' roof; if ever I am to be supposed
+to arrive at an age to direct my
+own actions, I must by that time have
+arrived at it.&mdash;I acted with deliberation.&mdash;Mr.
+Darnford found me a forlorn
+and oppressed woman, and promised<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-153" id="BPg_2-153"></a>[<a href="images/v2-153.png">153</a>]</span>
+the protection women in the present
+state of society want.&mdash;But the man
+who now claims me&mdash;was he deprived
+of my society by this conduct? The
+question is an insult to common sense,
+considering where Mr. Darnford met
+me.&mdash;Mr. Venables' door was indeed
+open to me&mdash;nay, threats and intreaties
+were used to induce me to return; but
+why? Was affection or honour the
+motive?&mdash;I cannot, it is true, dive into
+the recesses of the human heart&mdash;yet
+I presume to assert, [borne out as
+I am by a variety of circumstances,]
+that he was merely influenced by the
+most rapacious avarice.</p>
+
+<p>"I claim then a divorce, and the
+liberty of enjoying, free from molestation,
+the fortune left to me by a relation,
+who was well aware of the character
+of the man with whom I had to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-154" id="BPg_2-154"></a>[<a href="images/v2-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+contend.&mdash;I appeal to the justice and
+humanity of the jury&mdash;a body of men,
+whose private judgment must be allowed
+to modify laws, that must be
+unjust, because definite rules can never
+apply to indefinite circumstances&mdash;and
+I deprecate punishment upon the man
+of my choice, freeing him, as I solemnly
+do, from the charge of seduction.]</p>
+
+<p>"I did not put myself into a situation
+to justify a charge of adultery, till
+I had, from conviction, shaken off the
+fetters which bound me to Mr. Venables.&mdash;While
+I lived with him, I defy
+the voice of calumny to sully what is
+termed the fair fame of woman.&mdash;Neglected
+by my husband, I never encouraged
+a lover; and preserved with
+scrupulous care, what is termed my
+honour, at the expence of my peace,
+till he, who should have been its guar<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-155" id="BPg_2-155"></a>[<a href="images/v2-155.png">155</a>]</span>dian,
+laid traps to ensnare me. From
+that moment I believed myself, in the
+sight of heaven, free&mdash;and no power
+on earth shall force me to renounce my
+resolution."</p>
+
+<p>The judge, in summing up the evidence,
+alluded to "the fallacy of letting
+women plead their feelings, as an excuse
+for the violation of the marriage-vow.
+For his part, he had always
+determined to oppose all innovation,
+and the new-fangled notions which incroached
+on the good old rules of conduct.
+We did not want French principles
+in public or private life&mdash;and, if
+women were allowed to plead their
+feelings, as an excuse or palliation of
+infidelity, it was opening a flood-gate
+for immorality. What virtuous woman
+thought of her feelings?&mdash;It was
+her duty to love and obey the man<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-156" id="BPg_2-156"></a>[<a href="images/v2-156.png">156</a>]</span>
+chosen by her parents and relations,
+who were qualified by their experience
+to judge better for her, than she could
+for herself. As to the charges brought
+against the husband, they were vague,
+supported by no witnesses, excepting
+that of imprisonment in a private mad-house.
+The proofs of an insanity in the
+family, might render that however a
+prudent measure; and indeed the conduct
+of the lady did not appear that of
+a person of sane mind. Still such a
+mode of proceeding could not be justified,
+and might perhaps entitle the
+lady [in another court] to a sentence of
+separation from bed and board, during
+the joint lives of the parties; but he
+hoped that no Englishman would legalize
+adultery, by enabling the adulteress
+to enrich her seducer. Too many restrictions
+could not be thrown in the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-157" id="BPg_2-157"></a>[<a href="images/v2-157.png">157</a>]</span>
+way of divorces, if we wished to maintain
+the sanctity of marriage; and,
+though they might bear a little hard on
+a few, very few individuals, it was
+evidently for the good of the whole."</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-158" id="BPg_2-158"></a>[<a href="images/v2-158.png">158</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCONCLUSION" id="BCONCLUSION"></a>CONCLUSION,</h2>
+
+<h3>BY THE EDITOR.</h3>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Very</span> few hints exist respecting the
+plan of the remainder of the work. I
+find only two detached sentences, and
+some scattered heads for the continuation
+of the story. I transcribe the
+whole.</p>
+
+<p class="center">I.</p>
+
+<p>"Darnford's letters were affectionate;
+but circumstances occasioned delays,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-159" id="BPg_2-159"></a>[<a href="images/v2-159.png">159</a>]</span>
+and the miscarriage of some letters
+rendered the reception of wished-for
+answers doubtful: his return was necessary
+to calm Maria's mind."</p>
+
+<p class="center">II.</p>
+
+<p>"As Darnford had informed her that
+his business was settled, his delaying to
+return seemed extraordinary; but love
+to excess, excludes fear or suspicion."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>The scattered heads for the continuation
+of the story, are as follow<a name="BFNanchor_159-A_9" id="BFNanchor_159-A_9"></a><a href="#BFootnote_159-A_9" class="fnanchor">[159-A]</a>.</p>
+
+<p class="center">I.</p>
+
+<p>"Trial for adultery&mdash;Maria defends
+herself&mdash;A separation from bed and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-160" id="BPg_2-160"></a>[<a href="images/v2-160.png">160</a>]</span>
+board is the consequence&mdash;Her fortune
+is thrown into chancery&mdash;Darnford obtains
+a part of his property&mdash;Maria
+goes into the country."</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">II.</p>
+
+<p>"A prosecution for adultery commenced&mdash;Trial&mdash;Darnford
+sets out for
+France&mdash;Letters&mdash;Once more pregnant&mdash;He
+returns&mdash;Mysterious behaviour&mdash;Visit&mdash;Expectation&mdash;Discovery&mdash;Interview&mdash;Consequence."</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">III.</p>
+
+<p>"Sued by her husband&mdash;Damages
+awarded to him&mdash;Separation from bed
+and board&mdash;Darnford goes abroad&mdash;Maria
+into the country&mdash;Provides for
+her father&mdash;Is shunned&mdash;Returns to
+London&mdash;Expects to see her lover<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-161" id="BPg_2-161"></a>[<a href="images/v2-161.png">161</a>]</span>&mdash;The
+rack of expectation&mdash;Finds herself
+again with child&mdash;Delighted&mdash;A discovery&mdash;A
+visit&mdash;A miscarriage&mdash;Conclusion."</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">IV.</p>
+
+<p>"Divorced by her husband&mdash;Her
+lover unfaithful&mdash;Pregnancy&mdash;Miscarriage&mdash;Suicide."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>[The following passage appears in
+some respects to deviate from the preceding
+hints. It is superscribed]</p>
+
+
+<h5>"THE END.</h5>
+
+
+<p>"She swallowed the laudanum; her
+soul was calm&mdash;the tempest had sub<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-162" id="BPg_2-162"></a>[<a href="images/v2-162.png">162</a>]</span>sided&mdash;and
+nothing remained but an
+eager longing to forget herself&mdash;to
+fly from the anguish she endured
+to escape from thought&mdash;from this
+hell of disappointment.</p>
+
+<p>"Still her eyes closed not&mdash;one remembrance
+with frightful velocity followed
+another&mdash;All the incidents of
+her life were in arms, embodied to
+assail her, and prevent her sinking
+into the sleep of death.&mdash;Her murdered
+child again appeared to her,
+mourning for the babe of which she
+was the tomb.&mdash;'And could it have
+a nobler?&mdash;Surely it is better to die
+with me, than to enter on life without
+a mother's care!&mdash;I cannot live!&mdash;but
+could I have deserted my child the
+moment it was born?&mdash;thrown it on
+the troubled wave of life, without
+a hand to support it?'&mdash;She looked<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-163" id="BPg_2-163"></a>[<a href="images/v2-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+up: 'What have I not suffered!&mdash;may
+I find a father where I am going!'&mdash;Her
+head turned; a stupor ensued;
+a faintness&mdash;'Have a little patience,'
+said Maria, holding her swimming
+head (she thought of her mother),
+'this cannot last long; and what is a
+little bodily pain to the pangs I have
+endured?'</p>
+
+<p>"A new vision swam before her.
+Jemima seemed to enter&mdash;leading a little
+creature, that, with tottering footsteps,
+approached the bed. The voice
+of Jemima sounding as at a distance,
+called her&mdash;she tried to listen, to speak,
+to look!</p>
+
+<p>"'Behold your child!' exclaimed
+Jemima. Maria started off the bed,
+and fainted.&mdash;Violent vomiting followed.</p>
+
+<p>"When she was restored to life, Je<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-164" id="BPg_2-164"></a>[<a href="images/v2-164.png">164</a>]</span>mima
+addressed her with great solemnity:
+'&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; led me to suspect,
+that your husband and brother had
+deceived you, and secreted the child.
+I would not torment you with doubtful
+hopes, and I left you (at a fatal
+moment) to search for the child!&mdash;I
+snatched her from misery&mdash;and (now
+she is alive again) would you leave
+her alone in the world, to endure what
+I have endured?'</p>
+
+<p>"Maria gazed wildly at her, her
+whole frame was convulsed with emotion;
+when the child, whom Jemima
+had been tutoring all the journey, uttered
+the word 'Mamma!' She
+caught her to her bosom, and burst
+into a passion of tears&mdash;then, resting
+the child gently on the bed, as if
+afraid of killing it,&mdash;she put her hand
+to her eyes, to conceal as it were the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-165" id="BPg_2-165"></a>[<a href="images/v2-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+agonizing struggle of her soul. She
+remained silent for five minutes, crossing
+her arms over her bosom, and reclining
+her head,&mdash;then exclaimed:
+'The conflict is over!&mdash;I will live for
+my child!'"</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>A few readers perhaps, in looking
+over these hints, will wonder how it
+could have been practicable, without
+tediousness, or remitting in any degree
+the interest of the story, to have filled,
+from these slight sketches, a number of
+pages, more considerable than those
+which have been already presented.
+But, in reality, these hints, simple as
+they are, are pregnant with passion and
+distress. It is the refuge of barren au<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-166" id="BPg_2-166"></a>[<a href="images/v2-166.png">166</a>]</span>thors
+only, to crowd their fictions with
+so great a number of events, as to suffer
+no one of them to sink into the reader's
+mind. It is the province of true genius
+to develop events, to discover their
+capabilities, to ascertain the different
+passions and sentiments with which they
+are fraught, and to diversify them with
+incidents, that give reality to the picture,
+and take a hold upon the mind of a
+reader of taste, from which they can
+never be loosened. It was particularly
+the design of the author, in the present
+instance, to make her story subordinate
+to a great moral purpose, that "of exhibiting
+the misery and oppression, peculiar
+to women, that arise out of the
+partial laws and customs of society.&mdash;This
+view restrained her fancy<a name="BFNanchor_166-A_10" id="BFNanchor_166-A_10"></a><a href="#BFootnote_166-A_10" class="fnanchor">[166-A]</a>." It<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-167" id="BPg_2-167"></a>[<a href="images/v2-167.png">167</a>]</span>
+was necessary for her, to place in a striking
+point of view, evils that are too
+frequently overlooked, and to drag into
+light those details of oppression, of
+which the grosser and more insensible
+part of mankind make little account.</p>
+
+
+<h4>THE END.</h4>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_159-A_9" id="BFootnote_159-A_9"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_159-A_9"><span class="label">[159-A]</span></a> To understand these minutes, it is necessary
+the reader should consider each of them as setting
+out from the same point in the story, <i>viz.</i> the point
+to which it is brought down in the preceding
+chapter.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_166-A_10" id="BFootnote_166-A_10"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_166-A_10"><span class="label">[166-A]</span></a> See author's preface.</p></div>
+</div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-168" id="BPg_2-168"></a>[<a href="images/v2-168.png">168</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-169" id="BPg_2-169"></a>[<a href="images/v2-169.png">169</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="BLESSONS" id="BLESSONS"></a>LESSONS.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-170" id="BPg_2-170"></a>[<a href="images/v2-170.png">170</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-171" id="BPg_2-171"></a>[<a href="images/v2-171.png">171</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>ADVERTISEMENT,</h2>
+
+<h3>BY THE EDITOR.</h3>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> following pages will, I believe,
+be judged by every reader of taste to
+have been worth preserving, among
+the other testimonies the author left
+behind her, of her genius and the
+soundness of her understanding. To<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-172" id="BPg_2-172"></a>[<a href="images/v2-172.png">172</a>]</span>
+such readers I leave the task of comparing
+these lessons, with other works
+of the same nature previously published.
+It is obvious that the author has struck
+out a path of her own, and by no means
+intrenched upon the plans of her predecessors.</p>
+
+<p>It may however excite surprise in
+some persons to find these papers annexed
+to the conclusion of a novel. All
+I have to offer on this subject, consists
+in the following considerations:</p>
+
+<p>First, something is to be allowed for
+the difficulty of arranging the miscellaneous
+papers upon very different sub<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-173" id="BPg_2-173"></a>[<a href="images/v2-173.png">173</a>]</span>jects,
+which will frequently constitute
+an author's posthumous works.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p>Secondly, the small portion they occupy
+in the present volume, will perhaps
+be accepted as an apology, by
+such good-natured readers (if any such
+there are), to whom the perusal of
+them shall be a matter of perfect indifference.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p>Thirdly, the circumstance which
+determined me in annexing them to
+the present work, was the slight association
+(in default of a strong one)
+between the affectionate and pathetic
+manner in which Maria Venables ad<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-174" id="BPg_2-174"></a>[<a href="images/v2-174.png">174</a>]</span>dresses
+her infant, in the Wrongs of
+Woman; and the agonising and painful
+sentiment with which the author
+originally bequeathed these papers, as
+a legacy for the benefit of her child.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-175" id="BPg_2-175"></a>[<a href="images/v2-175.png">175</a>]</span></p>
+<h2>LESSONS.</h2>
+
+<p><i>The first book of a series which I intended to
+have written for my unfortunate girl<a name="BFNanchor_175-A_11" id="BFNanchor_175-A_11"></a><a href="#BFootnote_175-A_11" class="fnanchor">[175-A]</a>.</i></p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON I.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Cat.</span> Dog. Cow. Horse. Sheep.
+Pig. Bird. Fly.</p>
+
+<p>Man. Boy. Girl. Child.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-176" id="BPg_2-176"></a>[<a href="images/v2-176.png">176</a>]</span>
+Head. Hair. Face. Nose. Mouth.
+Chin. Neck. Arms. Hand. Leg.
+Foot. Back. Breast.</p>
+
+<p>House. Wall. Field. Street. Stone.
+Grass.</p>
+
+<p>Bed. Chair. Door. Pot. Spoon.
+Knife. Fork. Plate. Cup. Box.
+Boy. Bell.</p>
+
+<p>Tree. Leaf. Stick. Whip. Cart.
+Coach.</p>
+
+<p>Frock. Hat. Coat. Shoes. Shift.
+Cap.</p>
+
+<p>Bread. Milk. Tea. Meat. Drink.
+Cake.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON II.</p>
+
+<p>Come. Walk. Run. Go. Jump.
+Dance. Ride. Sit. Stand. Play.<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-177" id="BPg_2-177"></a>[<a href="images/v2-177.png">177</a>]</span>
+Hold. Shake. Speak. Sing. Cry.
+Laugh. Call. Fall.</p>
+
+<p>Day. Night. Sun. Moon. Light.
+Dark. Sleep. Wake.</p>
+
+<p>Wash. Dress. Kiss. Comb.</p>
+
+<p>Fire. Hot. Burn. Wind. Rain.
+Cold.</p>
+
+<p>Hurt. Tear. Break. Spill.</p>
+
+<p>Book. See. Look.</p>
+
+<p>Sweet. Good. Clean.</p>
+
+<p>Gone. Lost. Hide. Keep. Give.
+Take.</p>
+
+<p>One. Two. Three. Four. Five.
+Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.</p>
+
+<p>White. Black. Red. Blue. Green.
+Brown.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-178" id="BPg_2-178"></a>[<a href="images/v2-178.png">178</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">LESSON III.</p>
+
+<p>STROKE the cat. Play with the
+Dog. Eat the bread. Drink the milk.
+Hold the cup. Lay down the knife.</p>
+
+<p>Look at the fly. See the horse.
+Shut the door. Bring the chair. Ring
+the bell. Get your book.</p>
+
+<p>Hide your face. Wipe your nose.
+Wash your hands. Dirty hands. Why
+do you cry? A clean mouth. Shake
+hands. I love you. Kiss me now.
+Good girl.</p>
+
+<p>The bird sings. The fire burns.
+The cat jumps. The dog runs. The
+bird flies. The cow lies down. The man
+laughs. The child cries.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-179" id="BPg_2-179"></a>[<a href="images/v2-179.png">179</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">LESSON IV.</p>
+
+<p>LET me comb your head. Ask Betty
+to wash your face. Go and see for
+some bread. Drink milk, if you are
+dry. Play on the floor with the ball.
+Do not touch the ink; you will black
+your hands.</p>
+
+<p>What do you want to say to me?
+Speak slow, not so fast. Did you fall?
+You will not cry, not you; the baby
+cries. Will you walk in the fields?</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON V.</p>
+
+<p>COME to me, my little girl. Are
+you tired of playing? Yes. Sit down
+and rest yourself, while I talk to you.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-180" id="BPg_2-180"></a>[<a href="images/v2-180.png">180</a>]</span>
+Have you seen the baby? Poor little
+thing. O here it comes. Look
+at him. How helpless he is. Four
+years ago you were as feeble as this
+very little boy.</p>
+
+<p>See, he cannot hold up his head.
+He is forced to lie on his back, if his
+mamma do not turn him to the right or
+left side, he will soon begin to cry.
+He cries to tell her, that he is tired
+with lying on his back.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON VI.</p>
+
+<p>PERHAPS he is hungry. What
+shall we give him to eat? Poor fellow,
+he cannot eat. Look in his mouth, he
+has no teeth.</p>
+
+<p>How did you do when you were a baby
+like him? You cannot tell. Do you
+want to know? Look then at the dog,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-181" id="BPg_2-181"></a>[<a href="images/v2-181.png">181</a>]</span>
+with her pretty puppy. You could
+not help yourself as well as the puppy.
+You could only open your mouth,
+when you were lying, like William, on
+my knee. So I put you to my breast,
+and you sucked, as the puppy sucks
+now, for there was milk enough for
+you.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON VII.</p>
+
+<p>WHEN you were hungry, you began
+to cry, because you could not speak.
+You were seven months without teeth,
+always sucking. But after you got
+one, you began to gnaw a crust of
+bread. It was not long before another
+came pop. At ten months you had
+four pretty white teeth, and you used
+to bite me. Poor mamma! Still I did
+not cry, because I am not a child, but<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-182" id="BPg_2-182"></a>[<a href="images/v2-182.png">182</a>]</span>
+you hurt me very much. So I said to
+papa, it is time the little girl should
+eat. She is not naughty, yet she hurts
+me. I have given her a crust of bread,
+and I must look for some other milk.</p>
+
+<p>The cow has got plenty, and her
+jumping calf eats grass very well. He
+has got more teeth than my little girl.
+Yes, says papa, and he tapped you on
+the cheek, you are old enough to learn
+to eat? Come to me, and I will teach
+you, my little dear, for you must not
+hurt poor mamma, who has given you
+her milk, when you could not take any
+thing else.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON VIII.</p>
+
+<p>YOU were then on the carpet, for
+you could not walk well. So when
+you were in a hurry, you used to run<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-183" id="BPg_2-183"></a>[<a href="images/v2-183.png">183</a>]</span>
+quick, quick, quick, on your hands
+and feet, like the dog.</p>
+
+<p>Away you ran to papa, and putting
+both your arms round his leg, for your
+hands were not big enough, you looked
+up at him, and laughed. What did
+this laugh say, when you could not
+speak? Cannot you guess by what you
+now say to papa?&mdash;Ah! it was, Play
+with me, papa!&mdash;play with me!</p>
+
+<p>Papa began to smile, and you knew
+that the smile was always&mdash;Yes. So
+you got a ball, and papa threw it along
+the floor&mdash;Roll&mdash;roll&mdash;roll; and you
+ran after it again&mdash;and again. How
+pleased you were. Look at William,
+he smiles; but you could laugh loud&mdash;Ha!
+ha! ha!&mdash;Papa laughed louder
+than the little girl, and rolled the ball
+still faster.</p>
+
+<p>Then he put the ball on a chair, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-184" id="BPg_2-184"></a>[<a href="images/v2-184.png">184</a>]</span>
+you were forced to take hold of the
+back, and stand up to reach it. At
+last you reached too far, and down you
+fell: not indeed on your face, because
+you put out your hands. You were not
+much hurt; but the palms of your
+hands smarted with the pain, and you
+began to cry, like a little child.</p>
+
+<p>It is only very little children who cry
+when they are hurt; and it is to tell
+their mamma, that something is the
+matter with them. Now you can come
+to me, and say, Mamma, I have hurt
+myself. Pray rub my hand: it smarts.
+Put something on it, to make it well.
+A piece of rag, to stop the blood.
+You are not afraid of a little blood&mdash;not
+you. You scratched your arm with
+a pin: it bled a little; but it did you
+no harm. See, the skin is grown over
+it again.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-185" id="BPg_2-185"></a>[<a href="images/v2-185.png">185</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">LESSON IX.</p>
+
+<p>TAKE care not to put pins in your
+mouth, because they will stick in your
+throat, and give you pain. Oh! you
+cannot think what pain a pin would
+give you in your throat, should it remain
+there: but, if you by chance
+swallow it, I should be obliged to give
+you, every morning, something bitter
+to drink. You never tasted any thing
+so bitter! and you would grow very
+sick. I never put pins in my mouth;
+but I am older than you, and know how
+to take care of myself.</p>
+
+<p>My mamma took care of me, when I
+was a little girl, like you. She bade
+me never put any thing in my mouth,
+without asking her what it was.</p>
+
+<p>When you were a baby, with no more<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-186" id="BPg_2-186"></a>[<a href="images/v2-186.png">186</a>]</span>
+sense than William, you put every thing
+in your mouth to gnaw, to help your
+teeth to cut through the skin. Look
+at the puppy, how he bites that piece
+of wood. William presses his gums
+against my finger. Poor boy! he is so
+young, he does not know what he is
+doing. When you bite any thing, it is
+because you are hungry.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON X.</p>
+
+<p>SEE how much taller you are than
+William. In four years you have learned
+to eat, to walk, to talk. Why do you
+smile? You can do much more, you
+think: you can wash your hands and
+face. Very well. I should never kiss
+a dirty face. And you can comb your
+head with the pretty comb you always<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-187" id="BPg_2-187"></a>[<a href="images/v2-187.png">187</a>]</span>
+put by in your own drawer. To be
+sure, you do all this to be ready to take
+a walk with me. You would be obliged
+to stay at home, if you could not comb
+your own hair. Betty is busy getting
+the dinner ready, and only brushes
+William's hair, because he cannot do it
+for himself.</p>
+
+<p>Betty is making an apple-pye. You
+love an apple-pye; but I do not bid
+you make one. Your hands are not
+strong enough to mix the butter and
+flour together; and you must not try to
+pare the apples, because you cannot
+manage a great knife.</p>
+
+<p>Never touch the large knives: they
+are very sharp, and you might cut your
+finger to the bone. You are a little
+girl, and ought to have a little knife.
+When you are as tall as I am, you shall
+have a knife as large as mine; and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-188" id="BPg_2-188"></a>[<a href="images/v2-188.png">188</a>]</span>
+when you are as strong as I am, and
+have learned to manage it, you will not
+hurt yourself.</p>
+
+<p>You can trundle a hoop, you say;
+and jump over a stick. O, I forgot!&mdash;and
+march like the men in the red
+coats, when papa plays a pretty tune on
+the fiddle.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON XI.</p>
+
+<p>WHAT, you think that you shall
+soon be able to dress yourself entirely?
+I am glad of it: I have something else
+to do. You may go, and look for your
+frock in the drawer; but I will tie it,
+till you are stronger. Betty will tie it,
+when I am busy.</p>
+
+<p>I button my gown myself: I do not
+want a maid to assist me, when I am<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-189" id="BPg_2-189"></a>[<a href="images/v2-189.png">189</a>]</span>
+dressing. But you have not yet got
+sense enough to do it properly, and
+must beg somebody to help you, till you
+are older.</p>
+
+<p>Children grow older and wiser at the
+same time. William is not able to take
+a piece of meat, because he has not got
+the sense which would make him think
+that, without teeth, meat would do him
+harm. He cannot tell what is good for
+him.</p>
+
+<p>The sense of children grows with
+them. You know much more than
+William, now you walk alone, and talk;
+but you do not know as much as the
+boys and girls you see playing yonder,
+who are half as tall again as you; and
+they do not know half as much as their
+fathers and mothers, who are men and
+women grown. Papa and I were children,
+like you; and men and women<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-190" id="BPg_2-190"></a>[<a href="images/v2-190.png">190</a>]</span>
+took care of us. I carry William, because
+he is too weak to walk. I lift
+you over a stile, and over the gutter,
+when you cannot jump over it.</p>
+
+<p>You know already, that potatoes
+will not do you any harm: but I must
+pluck the fruit for you, till you are wise
+enough to know the ripe apples and
+pears. The hard ones would make you
+sick, and then you must take physic.
+You do not love physic: I do not love
+it any more than you. But I have more
+sense than you; therefore I take care
+not to eat unripe fruit, or any thing else
+that would make my stomach ache, or
+bring out ugly red spots on my face.</p>
+
+<p>When I was a child, my mamma
+chose the fruit for me, to prevent my
+making myself sick. I was just like
+you; I used to ask for what I saw, without
+knowing whether it was good or<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-191" id="BPg_2-191"></a>[<a href="images/v2-191.png">191</a>]</span>
+bad. Now I have lived a long time, I
+know what is good; I do not want any
+body to tell me.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON XII.</p>
+
+<p>LOOK at those two dogs. The old
+one brings the ball to me in a moment;
+the young one does not know how.
+He must be taught.</p>
+
+<p>I can cut your shift in a proper shape.
+You would not know how to begin.
+You would spoil it; but you will learn.</p>
+
+<p>John digs in the garden, and knows
+when to put the seed in the ground.
+You cannot tell whether it should be in
+the winter or summer. Try to find it
+out. When do the trees put out their
+leaves? In the spring, you say, after the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-192" id="BPg_2-192"></a>[<a href="images/v2-192.png">192</a>]</span>
+cold weather. Fruit would not grow
+ripe without very warm weather. Now
+I am sure you can guess why the summer
+is the season for fruit.</p>
+
+<p>Papa knows that peas and beans are
+good for us to eat with our meat. You
+are glad when you see them; but if he
+did not think for you, and have the
+seed put in the ground, we should have
+no peas or beans.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON XIII.</p>
+
+<p>POOR child, she cannot do much for
+herself. When I let her do any thing
+for me, it is to please her: for I could
+do it better myself.</p>
+
+<p>Oh! the poor puppy has tumbled
+off the stool. Run and stroak him. Put<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-193" id="BPg_2-193"></a>[<a href="images/v2-193.png">193</a>]</span>
+a little milk in a saucer to comfort him.
+You have more sense than he. You
+can pour the milk into the saucer without
+spilling it. He would cry for a day
+with hunger, without being able to get
+it. You are wiser than the dog, you
+must help him. The dog will love you
+for it, and run after you. I feed you
+and take care of you: you love me
+and follow me for it.</p>
+
+<p>When the book fell down on your
+foot, it gave you great pain. The poor
+dog felt the same pain just now.</p>
+
+<p>Take care not to hurt him when you
+play with him. And every morning
+leave a little milk in your bason for
+him. Do not forget to put the bason
+in a corner, lest somebody should fall
+over it.</p>
+
+<p>When the snow covers the ground,
+save the crumbs of bread for the birds.
+In the summer they find feed enough,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-194" id="BPg_2-194"></a>[<a href="images/v2-194.png">194</a>]</span>
+and do not want you to think about
+them.</p>
+
+<p>I make broth for the poor man who
+is sick. A sick man is like a child, he
+cannot help himself.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON X.</p>
+
+<p>WHEN I caught cold some time
+ago, I had such a pain in my head, I
+could scarcely hold it up. Papa
+opened the door very softly, because
+he loves me. You love me, yet you
+made a noise. You had not the sense
+to know that it made my head worse,
+till papa told you.</p>
+
+<p>Papa had a pain in the stomach, and
+he would not eat the fine cherries or
+grapes on the table. When I brought
+him a cup of camomile tea, he drank
+it without saying a word, or making<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-195" id="BPg_2-195"></a>[<a href="images/v2-195.png">195</a>]</span>
+an ugly face. He knows that I love
+him, and that I would not give him
+any thing to drink that has a bad taste,
+if it were not to do him good.</p>
+
+<p>You asked me for some apples when
+your stomach ached; but I was not angry
+with you. If you had been as wise
+as papa, you would have said, I will
+not eat the apples to-day, I must take
+some camomile tea.</p>
+
+<p>You say that you do not know how
+to think. Yes; you do a little. The
+other day papa was tired; he had been
+walking about all the morning. After
+dinner he fell asleep on the sopha. I
+did not bid you be quiet; but you
+thought of what papa said to you,
+when my head ached. This made you
+think that you ought not to make a
+noise, when papa was resting himself.
+So you came to me, and said to me,
+very softly, Pray reach me my ball, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-196" id="BPg_2-196"></a>[<a href="images/v2-196.png">196</a>]</span>
+I will go and play in the garden, till
+papa wakes.</p>
+
+<p>You were going out; but thinking
+again, you came back to me on your
+tip-toes. Whisper&mdash;&mdash;whisper. Pray
+mama, call me, when papa wakes;
+for I shall be afraid to open the door
+to see, lest I should disturb him.</p>
+
+<p>Away you went.&mdash;Creep&mdash;creep&mdash;and
+shut the door as softly as I could
+have done myself.</p>
+
+<p>That was thinking. When a child
+does wrong at first, she does not know
+any better. But, after she has been told
+that she must not disturb mama, when
+poor mama is unwell, she thinks herself,
+that she must not wake papa when
+he is tired.</p>
+
+<p>Another day we will see if you can
+think about any thing else.</p>
+
+<h4>THE END.</h4>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_175-A_11" id="BFootnote_175-A_11"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_175-A_11"><span class="label">[175-A]</span></a> This title which is indorsed on the back of
+the manuscript, I conclude to have been written
+in a period of desperation, in the month of
+October, 1795.</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-i_S" id="BPg_2-i_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="V2S" id="V2S"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>VOL. II.</h2>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-ii_S" id="BPg_2-ii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-iii_S" id="BPg_2-iii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. II.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-iv_S" id="BPg_2-iv_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-v_S" id="BPg_2-v_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>THE</h3>
+
+<h1>WRONGS OF WOMAN:</h1>
+
+<h3>OR,</h3>
+
+<h1>MARIA.</h1>
+
+<h2>A FRAGMENT.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. II.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-vi_S" id="BPg_2-vi_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-1_S" id="BPg_2-1_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3><a name="BV2_WRONGS_S" id="BV2_WRONGS_S"></a><i>WRONGS</i></h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr />
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_IX_S" id="BCHAP_IX_S"></a>CHAP. IX.</h2>
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">I Re&#383;ume</span> my pen to fly from thought.
+I was married; and we ha&#383;tened to
+London. I had purpo&#383;ed taking one of
+my &#383;i&#383;ters with me; for a &#383;trong motive
+for marrying, was the de&#383;ire of having
+a home at which I could receive them,
+now their own grew &#383;o uncomfortable,
+as not to de&#383;erve the cheering appellation.
+An objection was made to her<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-2_S" id="BPg_2-2_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-2.png">2</a>]</span>
+accompanying me, that appeared plau&#383;ible;
+and I reluctantly acquie&#383;ced. I
+was however willingly allowed to take
+with me Molly, poor Peggy's daughter.
+London and preferment, are ideas commonly
+a&#383;&#383;ociated in the country; and,
+as blooming as May, &#383;he bade adieu to
+Peggy with weeping eyes. I did not
+even feel hurt at the refu&#383;al in relation
+to my &#383;i&#383;ter, till hearing what my uncle
+had done for me, I had the &#383;implicity
+to reque&#383;t, &#383;peaking with warmth of
+their &#383;ituation, that he would give them
+a thou&#383;and pounds a-piece, which
+&#383;eemed to me but ju&#383;tice. He a&#383;ked
+me, giving me a ki&#383;s, 'If I had lo&#383;t my
+&#383;en&#383;es?' I &#383;tarted back, as if I had
+found a wa&#383;p in a ro&#383;e-bu&#383;h. I expo&#383;tulated.
+He &#383;neered; and the demon
+of di&#383;cord entered our paradi&#383;e, to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-3_S" id="BPg_2-3_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-3.png">3</a>]</span>
+poi&#383;on with his pe&#383;tiferous breath every
+opening joy.</p>
+
+<p>"I had &#383;ometimes ob&#383;erved defects
+in my hu&#383;band's under&#383;tanding; but, led
+a&#383;tray by a prevailing opinion, that
+goodne&#383;s of di&#383;po&#383;ition is of the fir&#383;t importance
+in the relative &#383;ituations of
+life, in proportion as I perceived the
+narrowne&#383;s of his under&#383;tanding, fancy
+enlarged the boundary of his heart.
+Fatal error! How quickly is the &#383;o
+much vaunted milkine&#383;s of nature turned
+into gall, by an intercour&#383;e with the
+world, if more generous juices do not
+&#383;u&#383;tain the vital &#383;ource of virtue!</p>
+
+<p>"One trait in my character was extreme
+credulity; but, when my eyes were
+once opened, I &#383;aw but too clearly all
+I had before overlooked. My hu&#383;band
+was &#383;unk in my e&#383;teem; &#383;till there are
+youthful emotions, which, for a while,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-4_S" id="BPg_2-4_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+fill up the cha&#383;m of love and friend&#383;hip.
+Be&#383;ides, it required &#383;ome time to enable
+me to &#383;ee his whole character in a
+ju&#383;t light, or rather to allow it to become
+fixed. While circum&#383;tances were
+ripening my faculties, and cultivating
+my ta&#383;te, commerce and gro&#383;s relaxations
+were &#383;hutting his again&#383;t any
+po&#383;&#383;ibility of improvement, till, by
+&#383;tifling every &#383;park of virtue in him&#383;elf,
+he began to imagine that it no where
+exi&#383;ted.</p>
+
+<p>"Do not let me lead you a&#383;tray, my
+child, I do not mean to a&#383;&#383;ert, that
+any human being is entirely incapable
+of feeling the generous emotions, which
+are the foundation of every true principle
+of virtue; but they are frequently,
+I fear, &#383;o feeble, that, like the inflammable
+quality which more or le&#383;s
+lurks in all bodies, they often lie for<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-5_S" id="BPg_2-5_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+ever dormant; the circum&#383;tances never
+occurring, nece&#383;&#383;ary to call them into
+action.</p>
+
+<p>"I di&#383;covered however by chance,
+that, in con&#383;equence of &#383;ome lo&#383;&#383;es in
+trade, the natural effect of his gambling
+de&#383;ire to &#383;tart &#383;uddenly into riches,
+the five thou&#383;and pounds given me by
+my uncle, had been paid very opportunely.
+This di&#383;covery, &#383;trange as you
+may think the a&#383;&#383;ertion, gave me plea&#383;ure;
+my hu&#383;band's embarra&#383;&#383;ments
+endeared him to me. I was glad to
+find an excu&#383;e for his conduct to my
+&#383;i&#383;ters, and my mind became calmer.</p>
+
+<p>"My uncle introduced me to &#383;ome
+literary &#383;ociety; and the theatres were
+a never-failing &#383;ource of amu&#383;ement to
+me. My delighted eye followed Mrs.
+Siddons, when, with dignified delicacy,
+&#383;he played Cali&#383;ta; and I involuntarily<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-6_S" id="BPg_2-6_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-6.png">6</a>]</span>
+repeated after her, in the &#383;ame tone,
+and with a long-drawn &#383;igh,</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">'Hearts like our's were pair'd&mdash;not match'd.'<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>"The&#383;e were, at fir&#383;t, &#383;pontaneous
+emotions, though, becoming acquainted
+with men of wit and poli&#383;hed manners,
+I could not &#383;ometimes help regretting
+my early marriage; and that,
+in my ha&#383;te to e&#383;cape from a temporary
+dependence, and expand my newly
+fledged wings, in an unknown &#383;ky, I
+had been caught in a trap, and caged
+for life. Still the novelty of London,
+and the attentive fondne&#383;s of my hu&#383;band,
+for he had &#383;ome per&#383;onal regard
+for me, made &#383;everal months glide
+away. Yet, not forgetting the &#383;ituation
+of my &#383;i&#383;ters, who were &#383;till very
+young, I prevailed on my uncle to &#383;et<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-7_S" id="BPg_2-7_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-7.png">7</a>]</span>tle
+a thou&#383;and pounds on each; and
+to place them in a &#383;chool near town,
+where I could frequently vi&#383;it, as well
+as have them at home with me.</p>
+
+<p>"I now tried to improve my hu&#383;band's
+ta&#383;te, but we had few &#383;ubjects in
+common; indeed he &#383;oon appeared
+to have little reli&#383;h for my &#383;ociety, unle&#383;s
+he was hinting to me the u&#383;e he
+could make of my uncle's wealth.
+When we had company, I was di&#383;gu&#383;ted
+by an o&#383;tentatious di&#383;play of
+riches, and I have often quitted the
+room, to avoid li&#383;tening to exaggerated
+tales of money obtained by lucky hits.</p>
+
+<p>"With all my attention and affectionate
+intere&#383;t, I perceived that I
+could not become the friend or confident
+of my hu&#383;band. Every thing I
+learned relative to his affairs I gathered
+up by accident; and I vainly endea<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-8_S" id="BPg_2-8_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-8.png">8</a>]</span>voured
+to e&#383;tabli&#383;h, at our fire-&#383;ide,
+that &#383;ocial conver&#383;e, which often renders
+people of different characters dear to
+each other. Returning from the theatre,
+or any amu&#383;ing party, I frequently
+began to relate what I had &#383;een and
+highly reli&#383;hed; but with &#383;ullen taciturnity
+he &#383;oon &#383;ilenced me. I &#383;eemed
+therefore gradually to lo&#383;e, in his &#383;ociety,
+the &#383;oul, the energies of which
+had ju&#383;t been in action. To &#383;uch a degree,
+in fact, did his cold, re&#383;erved
+manner affect me, that, after &#383;pending
+&#383;ome days with him alone, I have
+imagined my&#383;elf the mo&#383;t &#383;tupid creature
+in the world, till the abilities of
+&#383;ome ca&#383;ual vi&#383;itor convinced me that I
+had &#383;ome dormant animation, and &#383;entiments
+above the du&#383;t in which I had
+been groveling. The very countenance
+of my hu&#383;band changed; his com<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-9_S" id="BPg_2-9_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-9.png">9</a>]</span>plexion
+became &#383;allow, and all the
+charms of youth were vani&#383;hing with
+its vivacity.</p>
+
+<p>"I give you one view of the &#383;ubject;
+but the&#383;e experiments and alterations
+took up the &#383;pace of five years; during
+which period, I had mo&#383;t reluctantly extorted
+&#383;everal &#383;ums from my uncle, to
+&#383;ave my hu&#383;band, to u&#383;e his own words,
+from de&#383;truction. At fir&#383;t it was to prevent
+bills being noted, to the injury of
+his credit; then to bail him; and afterwards
+to prevent an execution from
+entering the hou&#383;e. I began at la&#383;t to
+conclude, that he would have made
+more exertions of his own to extricate
+him&#383;elf, had he not relied on mine,
+cruel as was the ta&#383;k he impo&#383;ed on me;
+and I firmly determined that I would
+make u&#383;e of no more pretexts.</p>
+
+<p>"From the moment I pronounced<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-10_S" id="BPg_2-10_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+this determination, indifference on his
+part was changed into rudene&#383;s, or
+&#383;omething wor&#383;e.</p>
+
+<p>"He now &#383;eldom dined at home,
+and continually returned at a late hour,
+drunk, to bed. I retired to another
+apartment; I was glad, I own, to
+e&#383;cape from his; for per&#383;onal intimacy
+without affection, &#383;eemed, to me the
+mo&#383;t degrading, as well as the mo&#383;t
+painful &#383;tate in which a woman of any
+ta&#383;te, not to &#383;peak of the peculiar delicacy
+of fo&#383;tered &#383;en&#383;ibility, could be
+placed. But my hu&#383;band's fondne&#383;s
+for women was of the gro&#383;&#383;e&#383;t kind,
+and imagination was &#383;o wholly out of
+the que&#383;tion, as to render his indulgences
+of this &#383;ort entirely promi&#383;cuous,
+and of the mo&#383;t brutal nature.
+My health &#383;uffered, before my heart
+was entirely e&#383;tranged by the loath<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-11_S" id="BPg_2-11_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-11.png">11</a>]</span>&#383;ome
+information; could I then have
+returned to his &#383;ullied arms, but as a
+victim to the prejudices of mankind,
+who have made women the property of
+their hu&#383;bands? I di&#383;covered even,
+by his conver&#383;ation, when intoxicated,
+that his favourites were wantons of the
+lowe&#383;t cla&#383;s, who could by their vulgar,
+indecent mirth, which he called nature,
+rou&#383;e his &#383;luggi&#383;h &#383;pirits. Meretricious
+ornaments and manners were
+nece&#383;&#383;ary to attract his attention. He
+&#383;eldom looked twice at a mode&#383;t woman,
+and &#383;at &#383;ilent in their company;
+and the charms of youth and beauty
+had not the &#383;lighte&#383;t effect on his &#383;en&#383;es,
+unle&#383;s the po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ors were initiated in
+vice. His intimacy with profligate women,
+and his habits of thinking, gave
+him a contempt for female endowments;
+and he would repeat, when<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-12_S" id="BPg_2-12_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+wine had loo&#383;ed his tongue, mo&#383;t of the
+common-place &#383;arca&#383;ms levelled at
+them, by men who do not allow them
+to have minds, becau&#383;e mind would be
+an impediment to gro&#383;s enjoyment.
+Men who are inferior to their fellow
+men, are always mo&#383;t anxious to e&#383;tabli&#383;h
+their &#383;uperiority over women.
+But where are the&#383;e reflections leading
+me?</p>
+
+<p>"Women who have lo&#383;t their hu&#383;band's
+affection, are ju&#383;tly reproved for
+neglecting their per&#383;ons, and not taking
+the &#383;ame pains to keep, as to gain a
+heart; but who thinks of giving the
+&#383;ame advice to men, though women
+are continually &#383;tigmatized for being
+attached to fops; and from the nature
+of their education, are more &#383;u&#383;ceptible
+of di&#383;gu&#383;t? Yet why a woman &#383;hould
+be expected to endure a &#383;loven, with<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-13_S" id="BPg_2-13_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-13.png">13</a>]</span>
+more patience than a man, and magnanimou&#383;ly
+to govern her&#383;elf, I cannot
+conceive; unle&#383;s it be &#383;uppo&#383;ed arrogant
+in her to look for re&#383;pect as well as a
+maintenance. It is not ea&#383;y to be
+plea&#383;ed, becau&#383;e, after promi&#383;ing to
+love, in different circum&#383;tances, we are
+told that it is our duty. I cannot, I
+am &#383;ure (though, when attending the
+&#383;ick, I never felt di&#383;gu&#383;t) forget my
+own &#383;en&#383;ations, when ri&#383;ing with health
+and &#383;pirit, and after &#383;centing the &#383;weet
+morning, I have met my hu&#383;band at
+the breakfa&#383;t table. The active attention
+I had been giving to dome&#383;tic regulations,
+which were generally &#383;ettled
+before he ro&#383;e, or a walk, gave a glow
+to my countenance, that contra&#383;ted with
+his &#383;quallid appearance. The &#383;queami&#383;hne&#383;s
+of &#383;tomach alone, produced
+by the la&#383;t night's intemperance, which<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-14_S" id="BPg_2-14_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-14.png">14</a>]</span>
+he took no pains to conceal, de&#383;troyed
+my appetite. I think I now &#383;ee him
+lolling in an arm-chair, in a dirty powdering
+gown, &#383;oiled linen, ungartered
+&#383;tockings, and tangled hair, yawning
+and &#383;tretching him&#383;elf. The new&#383;paper
+was immediately called for, if not
+brought in on the tea-board, from
+which he would &#383;carcely lift his eyes
+while I poured out the tea, excepting
+to a&#383;k for &#383;ome brandy to put into it, or
+to declare that he could not eat. In
+an&#383;wer to any que&#383;tion, in his be&#383;t humour,
+it was a drawling 'What do
+you &#383;ay, child?' But if I demanded
+money for the hou&#383;e expences, which I
+put off till the la&#383;t moment, his cu&#383;tomary
+reply, often prefaced with an
+oath, was, 'Do you think me, madam,
+made of money?'&mdash;The butcher,
+the baker, mu&#383;t wait; and, what was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-15_S" id="BPg_2-15_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-15.png">15</a>]</span>
+wor&#383;e, I was often obliged to witne&#383;s
+his &#383;urly di&#383;mi&#383;&#383;ion of trade&#383;men, who
+were in want of their money, and
+whom I &#383;ometimes paid with the pre&#383;ents
+my uncle gave me for my own
+u&#383;e.</p>
+
+<p><ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">"</ins>At this juncture my father's mi&#383;tre&#383;s,
+by terrifying his con&#383;cience, prevailed
+on him to marry her; he was already
+become a methodi&#383;t; and my brother,
+who now practi&#383;ed for him&#383;elf, had di&#383;covered
+a flaw in the &#383;ettlement made
+on my mother's children, which &#383;et it
+a&#383;ide, and he allowed my father, who&#383;e
+di&#383;tre&#383;s made him &#383;ubmit to any thing,
+a tithe of his own, or rather our fortune.</p>
+
+<p><ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">"</ins>My &#383;i&#383;ters had left &#383;chool, but were
+unable to endure home, which my father's
+wife rendered as di&#383;agreeable as
+po&#383;&#383;ible, to get rid of girls whom &#383;he<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-16_S" id="BPg_2-16_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-16.png">16</a>]</span>
+regarded as &#383;pies on her conduct. They
+were accompli&#383;hed, yet you can (may
+you never be reduced to the &#383;ame de&#383;titute
+&#383;tate!) &#383;carcely conceive the trouble
+I had to place them in the &#383;ituation
+of governe&#383;&#383;es, the only one in which
+even a well-educated woman, with
+more than ordinary talents, can &#383;truggle
+for a &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;tence; and even this is a
+dependence next to menial. Is it then
+&#383;urpri&#383;ing, that &#383;o many forlorn women,
+with human pa&#383;&#383;ions and feelings, take
+refuge in infamy? Alone in large man&#383;ions,
+I &#383;ay alone, becau&#383;e they had no
+companions with whom they could conver&#383;e
+on equal terms, or from whom
+they could expect the endearments of
+affection, they grew melancholy, and
+the &#383;ound of joy made them &#383;ad; and
+the younge&#383;t, having a more delicate
+frame, fell into a decline. It was with<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-17_S" id="BPg_2-17_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-17.png">17</a>]</span>
+great difficulty that I, who now almo&#383;t
+&#383;upported the hou&#383;e by loans from my
+uncle, could prevail on the <i>ma&#383;ter</i> of it,
+to allow her a room to die in. I watched
+her &#383;ick bed for &#383;ome months, and then
+clo&#383;ed her eyes, gentle &#383;pirit! for ever.
+She was pretty, with very engaging
+manners; yet had never an opportunity
+to marry, excepting to a very old man.
+She had abilities &#383;ufficient to have
+&#383;hone in any profe&#383;&#383;ion, had there been
+any profe&#383;&#383;ions for women, though &#383;he
+&#383;hrunk at the name of milliner or mantua-maker
+as degrading to a gentlewoman.
+I would not term this feeling
+fal&#383;e pride to any one but you, my
+child, whom I fondly hope to &#383;ee (yes;
+I will indulge the hope for a moment!)
+po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed of that energy of character
+which gives dignity to any &#383;tation; and
+with that clear, firm &#383;pirit that will en<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-18_S" id="BPg_2-18_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-18.png">18</a>]</span>able
+you to choo&#383;e a &#383;ituation for your&#383;elf,
+or &#383;ubmit to be cla&#383;&#383;ed in the lowe&#383;t,
+if it be the only one in which you
+can be the mi&#383;tre&#383;s of your own actions.</p>
+
+<p>"Soon after the death of my &#383;i&#383;ter,
+an incident occurred, to prove to me that
+the heart of a libertine is dead to natural
+affection; and to convince me,
+that the being who has appeared all
+tenderne&#383;s, to gratify a &#383;elfi&#383;h pa&#383;&#383;ion,
+is as regardle&#383;s of the innocent fruit of
+it, as of the object, when the fit is over.
+I had ca&#383;ually ob&#383;erved an old, mean-looking
+woman, who called on my hu&#383;band
+every two or three months to receive
+&#383;ome money. One day entering
+the pa&#383;&#383;age of his little counting-hou&#383;e,
+as &#383;he was going out, I
+heard her &#383;ay, 'The child is very weak;
+&#383;he cannot live long, &#383;he will &#383;oon die<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-19_S" id="BPg_2-19_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-19.png">19</a>]</span>
+out of your way, &#383;o you need not grudge
+her a little phy&#383;ic.'</p>
+
+<p>"'So much the better,' he replied,
+'and pray mind your own bu&#383;ine&#383;s,
+good woman.'</p>
+
+<p>"I was &#383;truck by his unfeeling, inhuman
+tone of voice, and drew back,
+determined when the woman came
+again, to try to &#383;peak to her, not out
+of curio&#383;ity, I had heard enough, but
+with the hope of being u&#383;eful to a poor,
+outca&#383;t girl.</p>
+
+<p>"A month or two elap&#383;ed before I
+&#383;aw this woman again; and then &#383;he
+had a child in her hand that tottered
+along, &#383;carcely able to &#383;u&#383;tain her own
+weight. They were going away, to
+return at the hour Mr. Venables was
+expected; he was now from home. I
+de&#383;ired the woman to walk into the
+parlour. She he&#383;itated, yet obeyed.<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-20_S" id="BPg_2-20_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-20.png">20</a>]</span>
+I a&#383;&#383;ured her that I &#383;hould not mention
+to my hu&#383;band (the word &#383;eemed to
+weigh on my re&#383;piration), that I had &#383;een
+her, or his child. The woman &#383;tared
+at me with a&#383;toni&#383;hment; and I turned
+my eyes on the &#383;qualid object [that accompanied
+her.] She could hardly &#383;upport
+her&#383;elf, her complexion was &#383;allow,
+and her eyes inflamed, with an inde&#383;cribable
+look of cunning, mixed with
+the wrinkles produced by the peevi&#383;hne&#383;s
+of pain.</p>
+
+<p>"<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">'</ins>Poor child!' I exclaimed. 'Ah!
+you may well &#383;ay poor child,' replied
+the woman. 'I brought her here to &#383;ee
+whether he would have the heart to
+look at her, and not get &#383;ome advice.
+I do not know what they de&#383;erve who
+nur&#383;ed her. Why, her legs bent under
+her like a bow when &#383;he came to me,
+and &#383;he has never been well &#383;ince; but,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-21_S" id="BPg_2-21_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-21.png">21</a>]</span>
+if they were no better paid than I am,
+it is not to be wondered at, &#383;ure
+enough.'</p>
+
+<p>"On further enquiry I was informed,
+that this mi&#383;erable &#383;pectacle was the
+daughter of a &#383;ervant, a country girl,
+who caught Mr. Venables' eye, and
+whom he &#383;educed. On his marriage he
+&#383;ent her away, her &#383;ituation being too
+vi&#383;ible. After her delivery, &#383;he was
+thrown on the town; and died in an
+ho&#383;pital within the year. The babe
+was &#383;ent to a pari&#383;h-nur&#383;e, and afterwards
+to this woman, who did not
+&#383;eem much better; but what was to be
+expected from &#383;uch a clo&#383;e bargain?
+She was only paid three &#383;hillings a week
+for board and wa&#383;hing.</p>
+
+<p>"The woman begged me to give her
+&#383;ome old clothes for the child, a&#383;&#383;uring
+me, that &#383;he was almo&#383;t afraid to a&#383;k<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-22_S" id="BPg_2-22_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-22.png">22</a>]</span>
+ma&#383;ter for money to buy even a pair
+of &#383;hoes.</p>
+
+<p>"I grew &#383;ick at heart. And, fearing
+Mr. Venables might enter, and oblige
+me to expre&#383;s my abhorrence, I ha&#383;tily
+enquired where &#383;he lived, promi&#383;ed to
+pay her two &#383;hillings a week more, and
+to call on her in a day or two; putting
+a trifle into her hand as a proof of my
+good intention.</p>
+
+<p>"If the &#383;tate of this child affected me,
+what were my feelings at a di&#383;covery I
+made re&#383;pecting Peggy&mdash;&mdash;?<a name="BFNanchor_22-A_6_S" id="BFNanchor_22-A_6_S"></a><a href="#BFootnote_22-A_6_S" class="fnanchor">[22-A]</a></p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_22-A_6_S" id="BFootnote_22-A_6_S"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_22-A_6_S"><span class="label">[22-A]</span></a> The manu&#383;cript is imperfect here. An epi&#383;ode
+&#383;eems to have been intended, which was
+never committed to paper.
+</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-23_S" id="BPg_2-23_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-23.png">23</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_X_S" id="BCHAP_X_S"></a>CHAP. X.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">My</span> father's &#383;ituation was now &#383;o
+di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ing, that I prevailed on my uncle
+to accompany me to vi&#383;it him; and
+to lend me his a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance, to prevent the
+whole property of the family from becoming
+the prey of my brother's rapacity;
+for, to extricate him&#383;elf out of
+pre&#383;ent difficulties, my father was totally
+regardle&#383;s of futurity. I took
+down with me &#383;ome pre&#383;ents for my
+&#383;tep-mother; it did not require an effort
+for me to treat her with civility, or
+to forget the pa&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>"This was the fir&#383;t time I had vi&#383;ited
+my native village, &#383;ince my marriage.
+But with what different emotions did
+I return from the bu&#383;y world, with a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-24_S" id="BPg_2-24_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-24.png">24</a>]</span>
+heavy weight of experience benumbing
+my imagination, to &#383;cenes, that whi&#383;pered
+recollections of joy and hope
+mo&#383;t eloquently to my heart! The
+fir&#383;t &#383;cent of the wild flowers from the
+heath, thrilled through my veins, awakening
+every &#383;en&#383;e to plea&#383;ure. The icy
+hand of de&#383;pair &#383;eemed to be removed
+from my bo&#383;om; and&mdash;forgetting my
+hu&#383;band&mdash;the nurtured vi&#383;ions of a romantic
+mind, bur&#383;ting on me with all
+their original wildne&#383;s and gay exuberance,
+were again hailed as &#383;weet realities.
+I forgot, with equal facility,
+that I ever felt &#383;orrow, or knew care
+in the country; while a tran&#383;ient rainbow
+&#383;tole athwart the cloudy &#383;ky of de&#383;pondency.
+The picture&#383;que form of
+&#383;everal favourite trees, and the porches
+of rude cottages, with their &#383;miling
+hedges, were recognized with the glad<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-25_S" id="BPg_2-25_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-25.png">25</a>]</span>&#383;ome
+playfulne&#383;s of childi&#383;h vivacity.
+I could have ki&#383;&#383;ed the chickens that
+pecked on the common; and longed to
+pat the cows, and frolic with the dogs
+that &#383;ported on it. I gazed with delight
+on the windmill, and thought it
+lucky that it &#383;hould be in motion, at
+the moment I pa&#383;&#383;ed by; and entering
+the dear green lane, which led directly
+to the village, the &#383;ound of the well-known
+rookery gave that &#383;entimental
+tinge to the varying &#383;en&#383;ations of my
+active &#383;oul, which only &#383;erved to
+heighten the lu&#383;tre of the luxuriant
+&#383;cenery. But, &#383;pying, as I advanced,
+the &#383;pire, peeping over the withered tops
+of the aged elms that compo&#383;ed the
+rookery, my thoughts flew immediately
+to the church-yard, and tears of affection,
+&#383;uch was the effect of my imagination,
+bedewed my mother's grave!<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-26_S" id="BPg_2-26_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-26.png">26</a>]</span>
+Sorrow gave place to devotional feelings.
+I wandered through the church
+in fancy, as I u&#383;ed &#383;ometimes to do on
+a Saturday evening. I recollected with
+what fervour I addre&#383;&#383;ed the God of
+my youth: and once more with rapturous
+love looked above my &#383;orrows
+to the Father of nature. I pau&#383;e&mdash;feeling
+forcibly all the emotions I am de&#383;cribing;
+and (reminded, as I regi&#383;ter
+my &#383;orrows, of the &#383;ublime calm I have
+felt, when in &#383;ome tremendous &#383;olitude,
+my &#383;oul re&#383;ted on it&#383;elf, and
+&#383;eemed to fill the univer&#383;e) I in&#383;en&#383;ibly
+breathe &#383;oft, hu&#383;hing every wayward
+emotion, as if fearing to &#383;ully with a
+&#383;igh, a contentment &#383;o extatic.</p>
+
+<p>"Having &#383;ettled my father's affairs,
+and, by my exertions in his favour, made
+my brother my &#383;worn foe, I returned
+to London. My hu&#383;band's conduct<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-27_S" id="BPg_2-27_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-27.png">27</a>]</span>
+was now changed; I had during my
+ab&#383;ence, received &#383;everal affectionate,
+penitential letters from him; and he
+&#383;eemed on my arrival, to wi&#383;h by his
+behaviour to prove his &#383;incerity. I
+could not then conceive why he acted
+thus; and, when the &#383;u&#383;picion darted
+into my head, that it might ari&#383;e from
+ob&#383;erving my increa&#383;ing influence with
+my uncle, I almo&#383;t de&#383;pi&#383;ed my&#383;elf for
+imagining that &#383;uch a degree of deba&#383;ing
+&#383;elfi&#383;hne&#383;s could exi&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>"He became, unaccountable as was
+the change, tender and attentive; and,
+attacking my weak &#383;ide, made a confe&#383;&#383;ion
+of his follies, and lamented the
+embarra&#383;&#383;ments in which I, who merited
+a far different fate, might be involved.
+He be&#383;ought me to aid him with my
+coun&#383;el, prai&#383;ed my under&#383;tanding, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-28_S" id="BPg_2-28_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-28.png">28</a>]</span>
+appealed to the tenderne&#383;s of my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>"This conduct only in&#383;pired me with
+compa&#383;&#383;ion. I wi&#383;hed to be his friend;
+but love had &#383;pread his ro&#383;y pinions,
+and fled far, far away; and had not
+(like &#383;ome exqui&#383;ite perfumes, the fine
+&#383;pirit of which is continually mingling
+with the air) left a fragrance behind,
+to mark where he had &#383;hook his wings.
+My hu&#383;band's renewed care&#383;&#383;es then
+became hateful to me; his brutality
+was tolerable, compared to his di&#383;ta&#383;teful
+fondne&#383;s. Still, compa&#383;&#383;ion, and
+the fear of in&#383;ulting his &#383;uppo&#383;ed feelings,
+by a want of &#383;ympathy, made
+me di&#383;&#383;emble, and do violence to my
+delicacy. What a ta&#383;k!</p>
+
+<p>"Tho&#383;e who &#383;upport a &#383;y&#383;tem of
+what I term fal&#383;e refinement, and will<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-29_S" id="BPg_2-29_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+not allow great part of love in the female,
+as well as male brea&#383;t, to &#383;pring
+in &#383;ome re&#383;pects involuntarily, may not
+admit that charms are as nece&#383;&#383;ary to
+feed the pa&#383;&#383;ion, as virtues to convert
+the mellowing &#383;pirit into friend&#383;hip. To
+&#383;uch ob&#383;ervers I have nothing to &#383;ay,
+any more than to the morali&#383;ts, who in&#383;i&#383;t
+that women ought to, and can love
+their hu&#383;bands, becau&#383;e it is their duty.
+To you, my child, I may add, with a
+heart tremblingly alive to your future
+conduct, &#383;ome ob&#383;ervations, dictated
+by my pre&#383;ent feelings, on calmly reviewing
+this period of my life. When
+noveli&#383;ts or morali&#383;ts prai&#383;e as a virtue,
+a woman's coldne&#383;s of con&#383;titution, and
+want of pa&#383;&#383;ion; and make her yield
+to the ardour of her lover out of &#383;heer
+compa&#383;&#383;ion, or to promote a frigid plan
+of future comfort, I am di&#383;gu&#383;ted.<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-30_S" id="BPg_2-30_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+They may be good women, in the ordinary
+acceptation of the phra&#383;e, and do
+no harm; but they appear to me not to
+have tho&#383;e 'finely fa&#383;hioned nerves,'
+which render the &#383;en&#383;es exqui&#383;ite. They
+may po&#383;&#383;e&#383;s tenderne&#383;s; but they want
+that fire of the imagination, which produces
+<i>active</i> &#383;en&#383;ibility, and <i>po&#383;itive</i> virtue.
+How does the woman de&#383;erve to
+be characterized, who marries one man,
+with a heart and imagination devoted
+to another? Is &#383;he not an object of
+pity or contempt, when thus &#383;acrilegiou&#383;ly
+violating the purity of her own
+feelings? Nay, it is as indelicate, when
+&#383;he is indifferent, unle&#383;s &#383;he be con&#383;titutionally
+in&#383;en&#383;ible; then indeed it is
+a mere affair of barter; and I have nothing
+to do with the &#383;ecrets of trade.
+Yes; eagerly as I wi&#383;h you to po&#383;&#383;e&#383;s
+true rectitude of mind, and purity of<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-31_S" id="BPg_2-31_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-31.png">31</a>]</span>
+affection, I mu&#383;t in&#383;i&#383;t that a heartle&#383;s
+conduct is the contrary of virtuous.
+Truth is the only ba&#383;is of virtue; and
+we cannot, without depraving our
+minds, endeavour to plea&#383;e a lover or
+hu&#383;band, but in proportion as he
+plea&#383;es us. Men, more effectually to
+en&#383;lave us, may inculcate this partial
+morality, and lo&#383;e &#383;ight of virtue in
+&#383;ubdividing it into the duties of particular
+&#383;tations; but let us not blu&#383;h for
+nature without a cau&#383;e!</p>
+
+<p>"After the&#383;e remarks, I am a&#383;hamed
+to own, that I was pregnant. The
+greate&#383;t &#383;acrifice of my principles in my
+whole life, was the allowing my hu&#383;band
+again to be familiar with my per&#383;on,
+though to this cruel act of &#383;elf-denial,
+when I wi&#383;hed the earth to
+open and &#383;wallow me, you owe your
+birth; and I the unutterable plea&#383;ure<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-32_S" id="BPg_2-32_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-32.png">32</a>]</span>
+of being a mother. There was &#383;omething
+of delicacy in my hu&#383;band's bridal
+attentions; but now his tainted breath,
+pimpled face, and blood-&#383;hot eyes,
+were not more repugnant to my &#383;en&#383;es,
+than his gro&#383;s manners, and lovele&#383;s
+familiarity to my ta&#383;te.</p>
+
+<p>"A man would only be expected to
+maintain; yes, barely grant a &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;tence,
+to a woman rendered odious by
+habitual intoxication; but who would
+expect him, or think it po&#383;&#383;ible to love
+her? And unle&#383;s 'youth, and genial
+years were flown,' it would be thought
+equally unrea&#383;onable to in&#383;i&#383;t, [under
+penalty of] forfeiting almo&#383;t every thing
+reckoned valuable in life, that he
+&#383;hould not love another: whil&#383;t woman,
+weak in rea&#383;on, impotent in will,
+is required to moralize, &#383;entimentalize
+her&#383;elf to &#383;tone, and pine her life away,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-33_S" id="BPg_2-33_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+labouring to reform her embruted
+mate. He may even &#383;pend in di&#383;&#383;ipation,
+and intemperance, the very intemperance
+which renders him &#383;o hateful,
+her property, and by &#383;tinting her
+expences, not permit her to beguile in
+&#383;ociety, a weari&#383;ome, joyle&#383;s life; for
+over their mutual fortune &#383;he has no
+power, it mu&#383;t all pa&#383;s through his
+hand. And if &#383;he be a mother, and
+in the pre&#383;ent &#383;tate of women, it is a
+great mi&#383;fortune to be prevented from
+di&#383;charging the duties, and cultivating
+the affections of one, what has &#383;he not
+to endure?&mdash;But I have &#383;uffered the
+tenderne&#383;s of one to lead me into reflections
+that I did not think of making,
+to interrupt my narrative&mdash;yet the full
+heart will overflow.</p>
+
+<p>"Mr. Venables' embarra&#383;&#383;ments did
+not now endear him to me; &#383;till, anxi<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-34_S" id="BPg_2-34_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-34.png">34</a>]</span>ous
+to befriend him, I endeavoured to
+prevail on him to retrench his expences;
+but he had always &#383;ome plau&#383;ible
+excu&#383;e to give, to ju&#383;tify his not
+following my advice. Humanity, compa&#383;&#383;ion,
+and the intere&#383;t produced by a
+habit of living together, made me try
+to relieve, and &#383;ympathize with him;
+but, when I recollected that I was
+bound to live with &#383;uch a being for
+ever&mdash;my heart died within me; my
+de&#383;ire of improvement became languid,
+and baleful, corroding melancholy took
+po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of my &#383;oul. Marriage had
+ba&#383;tilled me for life. I di&#383;covered in
+my&#383;elf a capacity for the enjoyment of
+the various plea&#383;ures exi&#383;tence affords;
+yet, fettered by the partial laws of &#383;ociety,
+this fair globe was to me an
+univer&#383;al blank.</p>
+
+<p>"When I exhorted my hu&#383;band to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-35_S" id="BPg_2-35_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+economy, I referred to him&#383;elf. I was
+obliged to practi&#383;e the mo&#383;t rigid, or
+contract debts, which I had too much
+rea&#383;on to fear would never be paid. I
+de&#383;pi&#383;ed this paltry privilege of a wife,
+which can only be of u&#383;e to the vicious
+or incon&#383;iderate, and determined not to
+increa&#383;e the torrent that was bearing
+him down. I was then ignorant of
+the extent of his fraudulent &#383;peculations,
+whom I was bound to honour
+and obey.</p>
+
+<p>"A woman neglected by her hu&#383;band,
+or who&#383;e manners form a &#383;triking
+contra&#383;t with his, will always have
+men on the watch to &#383;oothe and flatter
+her. Be&#383;ides, the forlorn &#383;tate of a
+neglected woman, not de&#383;titute of per&#383;onal
+charms, is particularly intere&#383;ting,
+and rou&#383;es that &#383;pecies of pity,
+which is &#383;o near akin, it ea&#383;ily &#383;lides<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-36_S" id="BPg_2-36_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-36.png">36</a>]</span>
+into love. A man of feeling thinks
+not of &#383;educing, he is him&#383;elf &#383;educed
+by all the noble&#383;t emotions of his &#383;oul.
+He figures to him&#383;elf all the &#383;acrifices a
+woman of &#383;en&#383;ibility mu&#383;t make, and
+every &#383;ituation in which his imagination
+places her, touches his heart,
+and fires his pa&#383;&#383;ions. Longing to
+take to his bo&#383;om the &#383;horn lamb, and
+bid the drooping buds of hope revive,
+benevolence changes into pa&#383;&#383;ion:
+and &#383;hould he then di&#383;cover that he is
+beloved, honour binds him fa&#383;t, though
+fore&#383;eeing that he may afterwards be
+obliged to pay &#383;evere damages to the
+man, who never appeared to value his
+wife's &#383;ociety, till he found that there
+was a chance of his being indemnified
+for the lo&#383;s of it.</p>
+
+<p>"Such are the partial laws enacted
+by men; for, only to lay a &#383;tre&#383;s on the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-37_S" id="BPg_2-37_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-37.png">37</a>]</span>
+dependent &#383;tate of a woman in the
+grand que&#383;tion of the comforts ari&#383;ing
+from the po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of property, &#383;he is
+[even in this article] much more injured
+by the lo&#383;s of the hu&#383;band's affection,
+than he by that of his wife; yet where
+is &#383;he, condemned to the &#383;olitude of a
+de&#383;erted home, to look for a compen&#383;ation
+from the woman, who &#383;educes
+him from her? She cannot drive an
+unfaithful hu&#383;band from his hou&#383;e, nor
+&#383;eparate, or tear, his children from
+him, however culpable he may be; and
+he, &#383;till the ma&#383;ter of his own fate, enjoys
+the &#383;miles of a world, that would
+brand her with infamy, did &#383;he, &#383;eeking
+con&#383;olation, venture to retaliate.</p>
+
+<p>"The&#383;e remarks are not dictated by
+experience; but merely by the compa&#383;&#383;ion
+I feel for many amiable women,
+the <i>out-laws</i> of the world. For my<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-38_S" id="BPg_2-38_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-38.png">38</a>]</span>&#383;elf,
+never encouraging any of the advances
+that were made to me, my lovers
+dropped off like the untimely &#383;hoots of
+&#383;pring. I did not even coquet with
+them; becau&#383;e I found, on examining
+my&#383;elf, I could not coquet with a man
+without loving him a little; and I perceived
+that I &#383;hould not be able to
+&#383;top at the line of what are termed <i>innocent
+freedoms</i>, did I &#383;uffer any. My
+re&#383;erve was then the con&#383;equence of
+delicacy. Freedom of conduct has
+emancipated many women's minds;
+but my conduct has mo&#383;t rigidly been
+governed by my principles, till the improvement
+of my under&#383;tanding has
+enabled me to di&#383;cern the fallacy of
+prejudices at war with nature and
+rea&#383;on.</p>
+
+<p>"Shortly after the change I have
+mentioned in my hu&#383;band's conduct,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-39_S" id="BPg_2-39_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-39.png">39</a>]</span>
+my uncle was compelled by his declining
+health, to &#383;eek the &#383;uccour of a
+milder climate, and embark for Li&#383;bon.
+He left his will in the hands of a friend,
+an eminent &#383;olicitor; he had previou&#383;ly
+que&#383;tioned me relative to my &#383;ituation
+and &#383;tate of mind, and declared very
+freely, that he could place no reliance
+on the &#383;tability of my hu&#383;band's profe&#383;&#383;ions.
+He had been deceived in the
+unfolding of his character; he now
+thought it fixed in a train of actions
+that would inevitably lead to ruin and
+di&#383;grace.</p>
+
+<p>"The evening before his departure,
+which we &#383;pent alone together, he
+folded me to his heart, uttering the endearing
+appellation of 'child.'&mdash;My
+more than father! why was I not permitted
+to perform the la&#383;t duties of
+one, and &#383;mooth the pillow of death?<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-40_S" id="BPg_2-40_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+He &#383;eemed by his manner to be convinced
+that he &#383;hould never &#383;ee me
+more; yet reque&#383;ted me, mo&#383;t earne&#383;tly,
+to come to him, &#383;hould I be obliged to
+leave my hu&#383;band. He had before expre&#383;&#383;ed
+his &#383;orrow at hearing of my
+pregnancy, having determined to prevail
+on me to accompany him, till I
+informed him of that circum&#383;tance. He
+expre&#383;&#383;ed him&#383;elf unfeignedly &#383;orry that
+any new tie &#383;hould bind me to a man
+whom he thought &#383;o incapable of e&#383;timating
+my value; &#383;uch was the kind
+language of affection.</p>
+
+<p>"I mu&#383;t repeat his own words; they
+made an indelible impre&#383;&#383;ion on my
+mind:</p>
+
+<p>"'The marriage &#383;tate is certainly that
+in which women, generally &#383;peaking,
+can be mo&#383;t u&#383;eful; but I am far from
+thinking that a woman, once married,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-41_S" id="BPg_2-41_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+ought to con&#383;ider the engagement as
+indi&#383;&#383;oluble (e&#383;pecially if there be no
+children to reward her for &#383;acrificing
+her feelings) in ca&#383;e her hu&#383;band
+merits neither her love, nor e&#383;teem.
+E&#383;teem will often &#383;upply the place of
+love; and prevent a woman from being
+wretched, though it may not
+make her happy. The magnitude of
+a &#383;acrifice ought always to bear &#383;ome
+proportion to the utility in view;
+and for a woman to live with a man,
+for whom &#383;he can cheri&#383;h neither affection
+nor e&#383;teem, or even be of any
+u&#383;e to him, excepting in the light of
+a hou&#383;e-keeper, is an abjectne&#383;s of
+condition, the enduring of which no
+concurrence of circum&#383;tances can
+ever make a duty in the &#383;ight of God
+or ju&#383;t men. If indeed &#383;he &#383;ubmits to
+it merely to be maintained in idlene&#383;s,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-42_S" id="BPg_2-42_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-42.png">42</a>]</span>
+&#383;he has no right to complain bitterly
+of her fate; or to act, as a per&#383;on of
+independent character might, as if
+&#383;he had a title to di&#383;regard general
+rules.</p>
+
+<p>"<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">'</ins>But the mi&#383;fortune is, that many
+women only &#383;ubmit in appearance,
+and forfeit their own re&#383;pect to &#383;ecure
+their reputation in the world. The
+&#383;ituation of a woman &#383;eparated from
+her hu&#383;band, is undoubtedly very different
+from that of a man who has
+left his wife. He, with lordly dignity,
+has &#383;haken of a clog; and the allowing
+her food and raiment, is
+thought &#383;ufficient to &#383;ecure his reputation
+from taint. And, &#383;hould &#383;he
+have been incon&#383;iderate, he will be
+celebrated for his genero&#383;ity and forbearance.
+Such is the re&#383;pect paid to
+the ma&#383;ter-key of property! A wo<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-43_S" id="BPg_2-43_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-43.png">43</a>]</span>man,
+on the contrary, re&#383;igning what
+is termed her natural protector (though
+he never was &#383;o, but in name) is
+de&#383;pi&#383;ed and &#383;hunned, for a&#383;&#383;erting
+the independence of mind di&#383;tinctive
+of a rational being, and &#383;purning at
+&#383;lavery.'</p>
+
+<p>"During the remainder of the evening,
+my uncle's tenderne&#383;s led him frequently
+to revert to the &#383;ubject, and
+utter, with increa&#383;ing warmth, &#383;entiments
+to the &#383;ame purport. At length
+it was nece&#383;&#383;ary to &#383;ay 'Farewell!'&mdash;and
+we parted&mdash;gracious God! to meet no
+more.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-44_S" id="BPg_2-44_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-44.png">44</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XI_S" id="BCHAP_XI_S"></a>CHAP. XI.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">A gentleman</span> of large fortune
+and of poli&#383;hed manners, had lately
+vi&#383;ited very frequently at our hou&#383;e,
+and treated me, if po&#383;&#383;ible, with more
+re&#383;pect than Mr. Venables paid him;
+my pregnancy was not yet vi&#383;ible,
+his &#383;ociety was a great relief to me, as
+I had for &#383;ome time pa&#383;t, to avoid expence,
+confined my&#383;elf very much at
+home. I ever di&#383;dained unnece&#383;&#383;ary,
+perhaps even prudent concealments;
+and my hu&#383;band, with great ea&#383;e, di&#383;covered
+the amount of my uncle's parting
+pre&#383;ent. A copy of a writ was the
+&#383;tale pretext to extort it from me; and
+I had &#383;oon rea&#383;on to believe that it was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-45_S" id="BPg_2-45_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-45.png">45</a>]</span>
+fabricated for the purpo&#383;e. I acknowledge
+my folly in thus &#383;uffering my&#383;elf
+to be continually impo&#383;ed on. I had
+adhered to my re&#383;olution not to apply
+to my uncle, on the part of my hu&#383;band,
+any more; yet, when I had received
+a &#383;um &#383;ufficient to &#383;upply my own
+wants, and to enable me to pur&#383;ue a
+plan I had in view, to &#383;ettle my younger
+brother in a re&#383;pectable employment,
+I allowed my&#383;elf to be duped by
+Mr. Venables' &#383;hallow pretences, and
+hypocritical profe&#383;&#383;ions.</p>
+
+<p>"Thus did he pillage me and my
+family, thus fru&#383;trate all my plans of
+u&#383;efulne&#383;s. Yet this was the man I was
+bound to re&#383;pect and e&#383;teem: as if re&#383;pect
+and e&#383;teem depended on an arbitrary
+will of our own! But a wife being
+as much a man's property as his
+hor&#383;e, or his a&#383;s, &#383;he has nothing &#383;he<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-46_S" id="BPg_2-46_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-46.png">46</a>]</span>
+can call her own. He may u&#383;e any
+means to get at what the law con&#383;iders
+as his, the moment his wife is in
+po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of it, even to the forcing of
+a lock, as Mr. Venables did, to &#383;earch
+for notes in my writing-de&#383;k&mdash;and all
+this is done with a &#383;how of equity, becau&#383;e,
+for&#383;ooth, he is re&#383;pon&#383;ible for
+her maintenance.</p>
+
+<p>"The tender mother cannot <i>lawfully</i>
+&#383;natch from the gripe of the
+gambling &#383;pendthrift, or bea&#383;tly
+drunkard, unmindful of his off&#383;pring,
+the fortune which falls to her by
+chance; or (&#383;o flagrant is the inju&#383;tice)
+what &#383;he earns by her own exertions.
+No; he can rob her with impunity,
+even to wa&#383;te publicly on a courtezan;
+and the laws of her country&mdash;if women
+have a country&mdash;afford her no protection
+or redre&#383;s from the oppre&#383;&#383;or, un<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-47_S" id="BPg_2-47_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-47.png">47</a>]</span>le&#383;s
+&#383;he have the plea of bodily fear;
+yet how many ways are there of goading
+the &#383;oul almo&#383;t to madne&#383;s, equally
+unmanly, though not &#383;o mean? When
+&#383;uch laws were framed, &#383;hould not
+impartial lawgivers have fir&#383;t decreed,
+in the &#383;tyle of a great a&#383;&#383;embly, who recognized
+the exi&#383;tence of an <i>&ecirc;tre &#383;upr&ecirc;me</i>,
+to fix the national belief, that
+the hu&#383;band &#383;hould always be wi&#383;er and
+more virtuous than his wife, in order
+to entitle him, with a &#383;how of ju&#383;tice,
+to keep this idiot, or perpetual minor,
+for ever in bondage. But I mu&#383;t have
+done&mdash;on this &#383;ubject, my indignation
+continually runs away with me.</p>
+
+<p>"The company of the gentleman I
+have already mentioned, who had a
+general acquaintance with literature
+and &#383;ubjects of ta&#383;te, was grateful to
+me; my countenance brightened up as<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-48_S" id="BPg_2-48_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+he approached, and I unaffectedly
+expre&#383;&#383;ed the plea&#383;ure I felt. The
+amu&#383;ement his conver&#383;ation afforded
+me, made it ea&#383;y to comply with my
+hu&#383;band's reque&#383;t, to endeavour to render
+our hou&#383;e agreeable to him.</p>
+
+<p>"His attentions became more
+pointed; but, as I was not of the
+number of women, who&#383;e virtue, as
+it is termed, immediately takes alarm,
+I endeavoured, rather by raillery than
+&#383;erious expo&#383;tulation, to give a different
+turn to his conver&#383;ation. He a&#383;&#383;umed a
+new mode of attack, and I was, for a
+while, the dupe of his pretended
+friend&#383;hip.</p>
+
+<p>"I had, merely in the &#383;tyle of <i>badinage</i>,
+boa&#383;ted of my conque&#383;t, and repeated
+his lover-like compliments to
+my hu&#383;band. But he begged me, for
+God's &#383;ake, not to affront his friend, or<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-49_S" id="BPg_2-49_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+I &#383;hould de&#383;troy all his projects, and be
+his ruin. Had I had more affection for
+my hu&#383;band, I &#383;hould have expre&#383;&#383;ed
+my contempt of this time-&#383;erving politene&#383;s:
+now I imagined that I only
+felt pity; yet it would have puzzled a
+ca&#383;ui&#383;t to point out in what the exact
+difference con&#383;i&#383;ted.</p>
+
+<p>"This friend began now, in confidence,
+to di&#383;cover to me the real &#383;tate
+of my hu&#383;band's affairs. 'Nece&#383;&#383;ity,'
+&#383;aid Mr. S&mdash;&mdash;; why &#383;hould I reveal
+his name? for he affected to palliate the
+conduct he could not excu&#383;e, 'had
+led him to take &#383;uch &#383;teps, by accommodation
+bills, buying goods on credit,
+to &#383;ell them for ready money, and &#383;imilar
+tran&#383;actions, that his character in
+the commercial world was gone. He
+was con&#383;idered,' he added, lowering
+his voice, 'on 'Change as a &#383;windler.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-50_S" id="BPg_2-50_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-50.png">50</a>]</span>
+"I felt at that moment the fir&#383;t maternal
+pang. Aware of the evils my
+&#383;ex have to &#383;truggle with, I &#383;till wi&#383;hed,
+for my own con&#383;olation, to be the mother
+of a daughter; and I could not
+bear to think, that the <i>&#383;ins</i> of her father's
+entailed di&#383;grace, &#383;hould be added
+to the ills to which woman is heir.</p>
+
+<p>"So completely was I deceived by
+the&#383;e &#383;hows of friend&#383;hip (nay, I believe,
+according to his interpretation, Mr. S&mdash;
+really was my friend) that I began
+to con&#383;ult him re&#383;pecting the be&#383;t mode
+of retrieving my hu&#383;band's character:
+it is the good name of a woman only
+that &#383;ets to ri&#383;e no more. I knew
+not that he had been drawn into a
+whirlpool, out of which he had not
+the energy to attempt to e&#383;cape. He
+&#383;eemed indeed de&#383;titute of the power
+of employing his faculties in any regu<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-51_S" id="BPg_2-51_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-51.png">51</a>]</span>lar
+pur&#383;uit. His principles of action
+were &#383;o loo&#383;e, and his mind &#383;o uncultivated,
+that every thing like order appeared
+to him in the &#383;hape of re&#383;traint;
+and, like men in the &#383;avage &#383;tate, he
+required the &#383;trong &#383;timulus of hope
+or fear, produced by wild &#383;peculations,
+in which the intere&#383;ts of others went
+for nothing, to keep his &#383;pirits awake.
+He one time po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed patrioti&#383;m, but
+he knew not what it was to feel hone&#383;t
+indignation; and pretended to be an advocate
+for liberty, when, with as little
+affection for the human race as for individuals,
+he thought of nothing but
+his own gratification. He was ju&#383;t
+&#383;uch a citizen, as a father. The &#383;ums
+he adroitly obtained by a violation of
+the laws of his country, as well as
+tho&#383;e of humanity, he would allow a
+mi&#383;tre&#383;s to &#383;quander; though &#383;he was,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-52_S" id="BPg_2-52_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-52.png">52</a>]</span>
+with the &#383;ame <i>&#383;ang froid</i>, con&#383;igned, as
+were his children, to poverty, when
+another proved more attractive.</p>
+
+<p>"On various pretences, his friend
+continued to vi&#383;it me; and, ob&#383;erving
+my want of money, he tried to induce
+me to accept of pecuniary aid; but this
+offer I ab&#383;olutely rejected, though it
+was made with &#383;uch delicacy, I could
+not be di&#383;plea&#383;ed.</p>
+
+<p>"One day he came, as I thought
+accidentally, to dinner. My hu&#383;band
+was very much engaged in bu&#383;ine&#383;s,
+and quitted the room &#383;oon after the
+cloth was removed. We conver&#383;ed as
+u&#383;ual, till confidential advice led again
+to love. I was extremely mortified.
+I had a &#383;incere regard for him, and
+hoped that he had an equal friend&#383;hip
+for me. I therefore began mildly to
+expo&#383;tulate with him. This gentle<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-53_S" id="BPg_2-53_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-53.png">53</a>]</span>ne&#383;s
+he mi&#383;took for coy encouragement;
+and he would not be diverted
+from the &#383;ubject. Perceiving his mi&#383;take,
+I &#383;eriou&#383;ly a&#383;ked him how, u&#383;ing
+&#383;uch language to me, he could profe&#383;s
+to be my hu&#383;band's friend? A &#383;ignificant
+&#383;neer excited my curio&#383;ity, and he,
+&#383;uppo&#383;ing this to be my only &#383;cruple,
+took a letter deliberately out of his
+pocket, &#383;aying, 'Your hu&#383;band's honour
+is not inflexible. How could you,
+with your di&#383;cernment, think it &#383;o?
+Why, he left the room this very day
+on purpo&#383;e to give me an opportunity
+to explain my&#383;elf; <i>he</i> thought me too
+timid&mdash;too tardy.<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">'</ins></p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;natched the letter with inde&#383;cribable
+emotion. The purport of it
+was to invite him to dinner, and to ridicule
+his chivalrous re&#383;pect for me.
+He a&#383;&#383;ured him, 'that every woman had<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-54_S" id="BPg_2-54_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-54.png">54</a>]</span>
+her price, and, with gro&#383;s indecency,
+hinted, that he &#383;hould be glad to have
+the duty of a hu&#383;band taken off his
+hands. The&#383;e he termed <i>liberal &#383;entiments</i>.
+He advi&#383;ed him not to &#383;hock my
+romantic notions, but to attack my
+credulous genero&#383;ity, and weak pity;
+and concluded with reque&#383;ting him to
+lend him five hundred pounds for a
+month or &#383;ix weeks.' I read this letter
+twice over; and the firm purpo&#383;e it in&#383;pired,
+calmed the ri&#383;ing tumult of my
+&#383;oul. I ro&#383;e deliberately, reque&#383;ted
+Mr. S&mdash;&mdash; to wait a moment, and in&#383;tantly
+going into the counting-hou&#383;e,
+de&#383;ired Mr. Venables to return with me
+to the dining-parlour.</p>
+
+<p>"He laid down his pen, and entered
+with me, without ob&#383;erving any change
+in my countenance. I &#383;hut the door,
+and, giving him the letter, &#383;imply<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-55_S" id="BPg_2-55_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-55.png">55</a>]</span>
+a&#383;ked, 'whether he wrote it, or was it
+a forgery?'</p>
+
+<p>"Nothing could equal his confu&#383;ion.
+His friend's eye met his, and
+he muttered &#383;omething about a joke&mdash;But
+I interrupted him&mdash;'It is &#383;ufficient&mdash;We
+part for ever.'</p>
+
+<p>"I continued, with &#383;olemnity, 'I
+have borne with your tyranny and infidelities.
+I di&#383;dain to utter what I
+have borne with. I thought you unprincipled,
+but not &#383;o decidedly
+vicious. I formed a tie, in the &#383;ight of
+heaven&mdash;I have held it &#383;acred; even
+when men, more conformable to my
+ta&#383;te, have made me feel&mdash;I de&#383;pi&#383;e all
+&#383;ubterfuge!&mdash;that I was not dead to
+love. Neglected by you, I have re&#383;olutely
+&#383;tifled the enticing emotions, and
+re&#383;pected the plighted faith you outraged.
+And you dare now to in&#383;ult<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-56_S" id="BPg_2-56_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-56.png">56</a>]</span>
+me, by &#383;elling me to pro&#383;titution!&mdash;Yes&mdash;equally
+lo&#383;t to delicacy and principle&mdash;you
+dared &#383;acrilegiou&#383;ly to barter
+the honour of the mother of your
+child.'</p>
+
+<p>"Then, turning to Mr. S&mdash;&mdash;, I
+added, 'I call on you, Sir, to witne&#383;s,'
+and I lifted my hands and eyes to heaven,
+'that, as &#383;olemnly as I took his
+name, I now abjure it,' I pulled off my
+ring, and put it on the table; 'and that
+I mean immediately to quit his hou&#383;e,
+never to enter it more. I will provide
+for my&#383;elf and child. I leave him as
+free as I am determined to be my&#383;elf&mdash;he
+&#383;hall be an&#383;werable for no debts of
+mine.'</p>
+
+<p>"A&#383;toni&#383;hment clo&#383;ed their lips, till
+Mr. Venables, gently pu&#383;hing his
+friend, with a forced &#383;mile, out of the
+room, nature for a moment prevailed,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-57_S" id="BPg_2-57_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-57.png">57</a>]</span>
+and, appearing like him&#383;elf, he turned
+round, burning with rage, to me:
+but there was no terror in the frown,
+excepting when contra&#383;ted with the
+malignant &#383;mile which preceded it.
+He bade me 'leave the hou&#383;e at my
+peril; told me he de&#383;pi&#383;ed my threats;
+I had no re&#383;ource; I could not &#383;wear the
+peace again&#383;t him!&mdash;I was not afraid of
+my life!&mdash;he had never &#383;truck me!'</p>
+
+<p>"He threw the letter in the fire,
+which I had incautiou&#383;ly left in his
+hands; and, quitting the room, locked
+the door on me.</p>
+
+<p>"When left alone, I was a moment
+or two before I could recollect my&#383;elf.
+One &#383;cene had &#383;ucceeded another with
+&#383;uch rapidity, I almo&#383;t doubted whether
+I was reflecting on a real event.
+'Was it po&#383;&#383;ible? Was I, indeed,
+free?'&mdash;Yes; free I termed my&#383;elf,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-58_S" id="BPg_2-58_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-58.png">58</a>]</span>
+when I decidedly perceived the conduct
+I ought to adopt. How had I panted
+for liberty&mdash;liberty, that I would have
+purcha&#383;ed at any price, but that of my
+own e&#383;teem! I ro&#383;e, and &#383;hook my&#383;elf;
+opened the window, and methought
+the air never &#383;melled &#383;o &#383;weet. The face
+of heaven grew fairer as I viewed it,
+and the clouds &#383;eemed to flit away obedient
+to my wi&#383;hes, to give my &#383;oul
+room to expand. I was all &#383;oul, and
+(wild as it may appear) felt as if I
+could have di&#383;&#383;olved in the &#383;oft balmy
+gale that ki&#383;&#383;ed my cheek, or have
+glided below the horizon on the glowing,
+de&#383;cending beams. A &#383;eraphic &#383;ati&#383;faction
+animated, without agitating
+my &#383;pirits; and my imagination collected,
+in vi&#383;ions &#383;ublimely terrible, or
+&#383;oothingly beautiful, an immen&#383;e variety
+of the endle&#383;s images, which nature<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-59_S" id="BPg_2-59_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-59.png">59</a>]</span>
+affords, and fancy combines, of the
+grand and fair. The lu&#383;tre of the&#383;e
+bright picture&#383;que &#383;ketches faded with
+the &#383;etting &#383;un; but I was &#383;till alive to
+the calm delight they had diffu&#383;ed
+through my heart.</p>
+
+<p>"There may be advocates for matrimonial
+obedience, who, making a di&#383;tinction
+between the duty of a wife and
+of a human being, may blame my conduct.&mdash;To
+them I write not&mdash;my feelings
+are not for them to analyze; and
+may you, my child, never be able to
+a&#383;certain, by heart-rending experience,
+what your mother felt before the pre&#383;ent
+emancipation of her mind!</p>
+
+<p>"I began to write a letter to my father,
+after clo&#383;ing one to my uncle;
+not to a&#383;k advice, but to &#383;ignify my determination;
+when I was interrupted
+by the entrance of Mr. Venables. His<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-60_S" id="BPg_2-60_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-60.png">60</a>]</span>
+manner was changed. His views on
+my uncle's fortune made him aver&#383;e to
+my quitting his hou&#383;e, or he would, I
+am convinced, have been glad to have
+&#383;haken off even the &#383;light re&#383;traint my
+pre&#383;ence impo&#383;ed on him; the re&#383;traint
+of &#383;howing me &#383;ome re&#383;pect. So far
+from having an affection for me, he
+really hated me, becau&#383;e he was convinced
+that I mu&#383;t de&#383;pi&#383;e him.</p>
+
+<p>"He told me, that, 'As I now had
+had time to cool and reflect, he did not
+doubt but that my prudence, and nice
+&#383;en&#383;e of propriety, would lead me to
+overlook what was pa&#383;&#383;ed.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Reflection,' I replied, 'had only
+confirmed my purpo&#383;e, and no power
+on earth could divert me from it.'</p>
+
+<p>"Endeavouring to a&#383;&#383;ume a &#383;oothing
+voice and look, when he would willingly
+have tortured me, to force me to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-61_S" id="BPg_2-61_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-61.png">61</a>]</span>
+feel his power, his countenance had an
+infernal expre&#383;&#383;ion, when he de&#383;ired me,
+'Not to expo&#383;e my&#383;elf to the &#383;ervants,
+by obliging him to confine me in my
+apartment; if then I would give my
+promi&#383;e not to quit the hou&#383;e precipitately,
+I &#383;hould be free&mdash;and&mdash;.' I declared,
+interrupting him, 'that I would
+promi&#383;e nothing. I had no mea&#383;ures
+to keep with him&mdash;I was re&#383;olved, and
+would not conde&#383;cend to &#383;ubterfuge.'</p>
+
+<p>"He muttered, 'that I &#383;hould &#383;oon
+repent of the&#383;e prepo&#383;terous airs;' and,
+ordering tea to be carried into my little
+&#383;tudy, which had a communication with
+my bed-chamber, he once more locked
+the door upon me, and left me to my
+own meditations. I had pa&#383;&#383;ively followed
+him up &#383;tairs, not wi&#383;hing to fatigue
+my&#383;elf with unavailing exertion.</p>
+
+<p>"Nothing calms the mind like a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-62_S" id="BPg_2-62_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-62.png">62</a>]</span>
+fixed purpo&#383;e. I felt as if I had heaved
+a thou&#383;and weight from my heart; the
+atmo&#383;phere &#383;eemed lightened; and, if
+I execrated the in&#383;titutions of &#383;ociety,
+which thus enable men to tyrannize
+over women, it was almo&#383;t a di&#383;intere&#383;ted
+&#383;entiment. I di&#383;regarded pre&#383;ent
+inconveniences, when my mind had
+done &#383;truggling with it&#383;elf,&mdash;when rea&#383;on
+and inclination had &#383;haken hands
+and were at peace. I had no longer
+the cruel ta&#383;k before me, in endle&#383;s per&#383;pective,
+aye, during the tedious
+for ever of life, of labouring to
+overcome my repugnance&mdash;of labouring
+to extingui&#383;h the hopes, the maybes
+of a lively imagination. Death I
+had hailed as my only chance for deliverance;
+but, while exi&#383;tence had &#383;till
+&#383;o many charms, and life promi&#383;ed
+happine&#383;s, I &#383;hrunk from the icy arms<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-63_S" id="BPg_2-63_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-63.png">63</a>]</span>
+of an unknown tyrant, though far more
+inviting than tho&#383;e of the man, to whom I
+&#383;uppo&#383;ed my&#383;elf bound without any other
+alternative; and was content to linger
+a little longer, waiting for I knew not
+what, rather than leave 'the warm
+precincts of the cheerful day,' and all
+the unenjoyed affection of my nature.</p>
+
+<p>"My pre&#383;ent &#383;ituation gave a new
+turn to my reflection; and I wondered
+(now the film &#383;eemed to be withdrawn,
+that ob&#383;cured the piercing &#383;ight of rea&#383;on)
+how I could, previou&#383;ly to the deciding
+outrage, have con&#383;idered my&#383;elf
+as everla&#383;tingly united to vice and folly?
+'Had an evil genius ca&#383;t a &#383;pell at my
+birth; or a demon &#383;talked out of chaos,
+to perplex my under&#383;tanding, and enchain
+my will, with delu&#383;ive prejudices?'</p>
+
+<p>"I pur&#383;ued this train of thinking; it<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-64_S" id="BPg_2-64_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+led me out of my&#383;elf, to expatiate on
+the mi&#383;ery peculiar to my &#383;ex. 'Are
+not,' I thought, 'the de&#383;pots for ever
+&#383;tigmatized, who, in the wantonne&#383;s of
+power, commanded even the mo&#383;t atrocious
+criminals to be chained to dead
+bodies? though &#383;urely tho&#383;e laws are
+much more inhuman, which forge adamantine
+fetters to bind minds together,
+that never can mingle in &#383;ocial communion!
+What indeed can equal the
+wretchedne&#383;s of that &#383;tate, in which
+there is no alternative, but to extingui&#383;h
+the affections, or encounter infamy?'</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-65_S" id="BPg_2-65_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-65.png">65</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XII_S" id="BCHAP_XII_S"></a>CHAP. XII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">Towards</span> midnight Mr. Venables
+entered my chamber; and, with
+calm audacity preparing to go to bed,
+he bade me make ha&#383;te, 'for that was
+the be&#383;t place for hu&#383;bands and wives
+to end their differences. He had been
+drinking plentifully to aid his courage.</p>
+
+<p>"I did not at fir&#383;t deign to reply.
+But perceiving that he affected to take
+my &#383;ilence for con&#383;ent, I told him that,
+'If he would not go to another bed, or
+allow me, I &#383;hould &#383;it up in my &#383;tudy
+all night.' He attempted to pull me
+into the chamber, half joking. But I
+re&#383;i&#383;ted; and, as he had determined not
+to give me any rea&#383;on for &#383;aying that
+he u&#383;ed violence, after a few more ef<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-66_S" id="BPg_2-66_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-66.png">66</a>]</span>forts,
+he retired, cur&#383;ing my ob&#383;tinacy,
+to bed.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;at mu&#383;ing &#383;ome time longer; then,
+throwing my cloak around me, prepared
+for &#383;leep on a &#383;opha. And, &#383;o fortunate
+&#383;eemed my deliverance, &#383;o &#383;acred
+the plea&#383;ure of being thus wrapped up
+in my&#383;elf, that I &#383;lept profoundly, and
+woke with a mind compo&#383;ed to encounter
+the &#383;truggles of the day. Mr.
+Venables did not wake till &#383;ome hours
+after; and then he came to me half-dre&#383;&#383;ed,
+yawning and &#383;tretching, with
+haggard eyes, as if he &#383;carcely recollected
+what had pa&#383;&#383;ed the preceding
+evening. He fixed his eyes on me for
+a moment, then, calling me a fool,
+a&#383;ked 'How long I intended to continue
+this pretty farce? For his part, he
+was devili&#383;h &#383;ick of it; but this was the
+plague of marrying women who pretended
+to know &#383;omething.'</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-67_S" id="BPg_2-67_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-67.png">67</a>]</span>
+"I made no other reply to this harangue,
+than to &#383;ay, 'That he ought to
+be glad to get rid of a woman &#383;o unfit
+to be his companion&mdash;and that any
+change in my conduct would be mean
+di&#383;&#383;imulation; for maturer reflection
+only gave the &#383;acred &#383;eal of rea&#383;on to
+my fir&#383;t re&#383;olution.'</p>
+
+<p>"He looked as if he could have
+&#383;tamped with impatience, at being
+obliged to &#383;tifle his rage; but, conquering
+his anger (for weak people, who&#383;e
+pa&#383;&#383;ions &#383;eem the mo&#383;t ungovernable,
+re&#383;train them with the greate&#383;t ea&#383;e,
+when they have a &#383;ufficient motive), he
+exclaimed, 'Very pretty, upon my
+&#383;oul! very pretty, theatrical flouri&#383;hes!
+Pray, fair Roxana, &#383;toop from your altitudes,
+and remember that you are
+acting a part in real life.'</p>
+
+<p>"He uttered this &#383;peech with a &#383;elf-<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-68_S" id="BPg_2-68_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-68.png">68</a>]</span>&#383;ati&#383;fied
+air, and went down &#383;tairs to
+dre&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>"In about an hour he came to me
+again; and in the &#383;ame tone &#383;aid, 'That
+he came as my gentleman-u&#383;her to hand
+me down to breakfa&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>"'Of the black rod?' a&#383;ked I.</p>
+
+<p>"This que&#383;tion, and the tone in
+which I a&#383;ked it, a little di&#383;concerted
+him. To &#383;ay the truth, I now felt no
+re&#383;entment; my firm re&#383;olution to free
+my&#383;elf from my ignoble thraldom, had
+ab&#383;orbed the various emotions which,
+during &#383;ix years, had racked my &#383;oul.
+The duty pointed out by my principles
+&#383;eemed clear; and not one tender feeling
+intruded to make me &#383;werve: The
+di&#383;like which my hu&#383;band had in&#383;pired
+was &#383;trong; but it only led me to wi&#383;h
+to avoid, to wi&#383;h to let him drop out of
+my memory; there was no mi&#383;ery, no<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-69_S" id="BPg_2-69_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-69.png">69</a>]</span>
+torture that I would not deliberately
+have cho&#383;en, rather than renew my
+lea&#383;e of &#383;ervitude.</p>
+
+<p>"During the breakfa&#383;t, he attempted
+to rea&#383;on with me on the folly of romantic
+&#383;entiments; for this was the indi&#383;criminate
+epithet he gave to every
+mode of conduct or thinking &#383;uperior
+to his own. He a&#383;&#383;erted, 'that all the
+world were governed by their own intere&#383;t;
+tho&#383;e who pretended to be actuated
+by different motives, were only
+deeper knaves, or fools crazed by books,
+who took for go&#383;pel all the rodomantade
+non&#383;en&#383;e written by men who
+knew nothing of the world. For his
+part, he thanked God, he was no hypocrite;
+and, if he &#383;tretched a point
+&#383;ometimes, it was always with an intention
+of paying every man his own.'</p>
+
+<p>"He then artfully in&#383;inuated, 'that<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-70_S" id="BPg_2-70_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-70.png">70</a>]</span>
+he daily expected a ve&#383;&#383;el to arrive, a
+&#383;ucce&#383;&#383;ful &#383;peculation, that would make
+him ea&#383;y for the pre&#383;ent, and that he
+had &#383;everal other &#383;chemes actually depending,
+that could not fail. He had
+no doubt of becoming rich in a few
+years, though he had been thrown back
+by &#383;ome unlucky adventures at the &#383;etting
+out.'</p>
+
+<p>"I mildly replied, 'That I wi&#383;hed he
+might not involve him&#383;elf &#383;till deeper.'</p>
+
+<p>"He had no notion that I was governed
+by a deci&#383;ion of judgment, not
+to be compared with a mere &#383;purt of
+re&#383;entment. He knew not what it was
+to feel indignation again&#383;t vice, and
+often boa&#383;ted of his placable temper,
+and readine&#383;s to forgive injuries. True;
+for he only con&#383;idered the being deceived,
+as an effort of &#383;kill he had not
+guarded again&#383;t; and then, with a cant<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-71_S" id="BPg_2-71_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-71.png">71</a>]</span>
+of candour, would ob&#383;erve, 'that he
+did not know how he might him&#383;elf
+have been tempted to act in the &#383;ame
+circum&#383;tances.' And, as his heart
+never opened to friend&#383;hip, it never was
+wounded by di&#383;appointment. Every
+new acquaintance he prote&#383;ted, it is
+true, was 'the clevere&#383;t fellow in the
+world;<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">'</ins> and he really thought &#383;o; till
+the novelty of his conver&#383;ation or manners
+cea&#383;ed to have any effect on his
+&#383;luggi&#383;h &#383;pirits. His re&#383;pect for rank or
+fortune was more permanent, though
+he chanced to have no de&#383;ign of availing
+him&#383;elf of the influence of either
+to promote his own views.</p>
+
+<p>"After a prefatory conver&#383;ation,&mdash;my
+blood (I thought it had been cooler)
+flu&#383;hed over my whole countenance as
+he &#383;poke&mdash;he alluded to my &#383;ituation.
+He de&#383;ired me to reflect&mdash;'and act like<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-72_S" id="BPg_2-72_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-72.png">72</a>]</span>
+a prudent woman, as the be&#383;t proof of
+my &#383;uperior under&#383;tanding; for he mu&#383;t
+own I had &#383;en&#383;e, did I know how to
+u&#383;e it. I was not,' he laid a &#383;tre&#383;s on
+his words, 'without my pa&#383;&#383;ions; and
+a hu&#383;band was a convenient cloke.&mdash;He
+was liberal in his way of thinking;
+and why might not we, like many other
+married people, who were above vulgar
+prejudices, tacitly con&#383;ent to let
+each other follow their own inclination?&mdash;He
+meant nothing more, in the
+letter I made the ground of complaint;
+and the plea&#383;ure which I &#383;eemed to
+take in Mr. S.'s company, led him to
+conclude, that he was not di&#383;agreeable
+to me.'</p>
+
+<p>"A clerk brought in the letters of
+the day, and I, as I often did, while
+he was di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ing &#383;ubjects of bu&#383;ine&#383;s,
+went to the <i>piano forte</i>, and began to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-73_S" id="BPg_2-73_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-73.png">73</a>]</span>
+play a favourite air to re&#383;tore my&#383;elf,
+as it were, to nature, and drive the
+&#383;ophi&#383;ticated &#383;entiments I had ju&#383;t been
+obliged to li&#383;ten to, out of my &#383;oul.</p>
+
+<p>"They had excited &#383;en&#383;ations &#383;imilar
+to tho&#383;e I have felt, in viewing the &#383;qualid
+inhabitants of &#383;ome of the lanes and
+back &#383;treets of the metropolis, mortified
+at being compelled to con&#383;ider
+them as my fellow-creatures, as if an
+ape had claimed kindred with me. Or,
+as when &#383;urrounded by a mephitical fog,
+I have wi&#383;hed to have a volley of cannon
+fired, to clear the incumbered atmo&#383;phere,
+and give me room to breathe
+and move.</p>
+
+<p>"My &#383;pirits were all in arms, and I
+played a kind of extemporary prelude.
+The cadence was probably wild and
+impa&#383;&#383;ioned, while, lo&#383;t in thought, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-74_S" id="BPg_2-74_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-74.png">74</a>]</span>
+made the &#383;ounds a kind of echo to my
+train of thinking.</p>
+
+<p>"Pau&#383;ing for a moment, I met Mr.
+Venables' eyes. He was ob&#383;erving me
+with an air of conceited &#383;ati&#383;faction, as
+much as to &#383;ay&mdash;'My la&#383;t in&#383;inuation
+has done the bu&#383;ine&#383;s&mdash;&#383;he begins to
+know her own intere&#383;t.' Then gathering
+up his letters, he &#383;aid, 'That
+he hoped he &#383;hould hear no more romantic
+&#383;tuff, well enough in a mi&#383;s
+ju&#383;t come from boarding &#383;chool;' and
+went, as was his cu&#383;tom, to the counting-hou&#383;e.
+I &#383;till continued playing;
+and, turning to a &#383;prightly le&#383;&#383;on, I
+executed it with uncommon vivacity.
+I heard foot&#383;teps approach the door,
+and was &#383;oon convinced that Mr. Venables
+was li&#383;tening; the con&#383;ciou&#383;ne&#383;s
+only gave more animation to my
+fingers. He went down into the kit<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-75_S" id="BPg_2-75_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-75.png">75</a>]</span>chen,
+and the cook, probably by his
+de&#383;ire, came to me, to know what I
+would plea&#383;e to order for dinner. Mr.
+Venables came into the parlour again,
+with apparent carele&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s. I perceived
+that the cunning man was over-reaching
+him&#383;elf; and I gave my directions
+as u&#383;ual, and left the room.</p>
+
+<p>"While I was making &#383;ome alteration
+in my dre&#383;s, Mr. Venables peeped
+in, and, begging my pardon for interrupting
+me, di&#383;appeared. I took
+up &#383;ome work (I could not read), and
+two or three me&#383;&#383;ages were &#383;ent to me,
+probably for no other purpo&#383;e, but to
+enable Mr. Venables to a&#383;certain what
+I was about.</p>
+
+<p>"I li&#383;tened whenever I heard the
+&#383;treet-door open; at la&#383;t I imagined I
+could di&#383;tingui&#383;h Mr. Venables' &#383;tep,
+going out. I laid a&#383;ide my work; my<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-76_S" id="BPg_2-76_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-76.png">76</a>]</span>
+heart palpitated; &#383;till I was afraid
+ha&#383;tily to enquire; and I waited a long
+half hour, before I ventured to a&#383;k the
+boy whether his ma&#383;ter was in the
+counting-hou&#383;e?</p>
+
+<p>"Being an&#383;wered in the negative,
+I bade him call me a coach, and collecting
+a few nece&#383;&#383;aries ha&#383;tily together,
+with a little parcel of letters and
+papers which I had collected the preceding
+evening, I hurried into it, de&#383;iring
+the coachman to drive to a di&#383;tant
+part of the town.</p>
+
+<p>"I almo&#383;t feared that the coach
+would break down before I got out of
+the &#383;treet; and, when I turned the
+corner, I &#383;eemed to breathe a freer air.
+I was ready to imagine that I was ri&#383;ing
+above the thick atmo&#383;phere of earth;
+or I felt, as wearied &#383;ouls might be &#383;up<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-77_S" id="BPg_2-77_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-77.png">77</a>]</span>po&#383;ed
+to feel on entering another &#383;tate
+of exi&#383;tence.</p>
+
+<p>"I &#383;topped at one or two &#383;tands of
+coaches to elude pur&#383;uit, and then
+drove round the &#383;kirts of the town to
+&#383;eek for an ob&#383;cure lodging, where I
+wi&#383;hed to remain concealed, till I could
+avail my&#383;elf of my uncle's protection.
+I had re&#383;olved to a&#383;&#383;ume my own name
+immediately, and openly to avow my
+determination, without any formal vindication,
+the moment I had found a
+home, in which I could re&#383;t free from
+the daily alarm of expecting to &#383;ee
+Mr. Venables enter.</p>
+
+<p>"I looked at &#383;everal lodgings; but
+finding that I could not, without a reference
+to &#383;ome acquaintance, who
+might inform my tyrant, get admittance
+into a decent apartment&mdash;men
+have not all this trouble&mdash;I thought of<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-78_S" id="BPg_2-78_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-78.png">78</a>]</span>
+a woman whom I had a&#383;&#383;i&#383;ted to furni&#383;h
+a little haberda&#383;her's &#383;hop, and
+who I knew had a fir&#383;t floor to let.</p>
+
+<p>"I went to her, and though I could
+not per&#383;uade her, that the quarrel between
+me and Mr. Venables would
+never be made up, &#383;till &#383;he agreed to
+conceal me for the pre&#383;ent; yet a&#383;&#383;uring
+me at the &#383;ame time, &#383;haking her
+head, that, when a woman was once
+married, &#383;he mu&#383;t bear every thing.
+Her pale face, on which appeared a
+thou&#383;and haggard lines and delving
+wrinkles, produced by what is emphatically
+termed fretting, inforced
+her remark; and I had afterwards an
+opportunity of ob&#383;erving the treatment
+&#383;he had to endure, which grizzled her
+into patience. She toiled from morning
+till night; yet her hu&#383;band would rob
+the till, and take away the money re<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-79_S" id="BPg_2-79_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-79.png">79</a>]</span>&#383;erved
+for paying bills; and, returning
+home drunk, he would beat her if &#383;he
+chanced to offend him, though &#383;he had
+a child at the brea&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>"The&#383;e &#383;cenes awoke me at night;
+and, in the morning, I heard her, as
+u&#383;ual, talk to her dear Johnny&mdash;he,
+for&#383;ooth, was her ma&#383;ter; no &#383;lave in
+the We&#383;t Indies had one more de&#383;potic;
+but fortunately &#383;he was of the
+true Ru&#383;&#383;ian breed of wives.</p>
+
+<p>"My mind, during the few pa&#383;t
+days, &#383;eemed, as it were, di&#383;engaged
+from my body; but, now the &#383;truggle
+was over, I felt very forcibly the effect
+which perturbation of &#383;pirits produces
+on a woman in my &#383;ituation.</p>
+
+<p>"The apprehen&#383;ion of a mi&#383;carriage,
+obliged me to confine my&#383;elf to
+my apartment near a fortnight; but
+I wrote to my uncle's friend for money,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-80_S" id="BPg_2-80_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-80.png">80</a>]</span>
+promi&#383;ing 'to call on him, and explain
+my &#383;ituation, when I was well enough
+to go out; mean time I earne&#383;tly intreated
+him, not to mention my place of
+abode to any one, le&#383;t my hu&#383;band&mdash;&#383;uch
+the law con&#383;idered him&mdash;&#383;hould
+di&#383;turb the mind he could not conquer.
+I mentioned my intention of &#383;etting out
+for Li&#383;bon, to claim my uncle's protection,
+the moment my health would
+permit.'</p>
+
+<p>"The tranquillity however, which
+I was recovering, was &#383;oon interrupted.
+My landlady came up to me one
+day, with eyes &#383;wollen with weeping,
+unable to utter what &#383;he was commanded
+to &#383;ay. She declared, 'That
+&#383;he was never &#383;o mi&#383;erable in her life;
+that &#383;he mu&#383;t appear an ungrateful
+mon&#383;ter; and that &#383;he would readily
+go down on her knees to me, to intreat<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-81_S" id="BPg_2-81_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-81.png">81</a>]</span>
+me to forgive her, as &#383;he had done to
+her hu&#383;band to &#383;pare her the cruel
+ta&#383;k.' Sobs prevented her from proceeding,
+or an&#383;wering my impatient
+enquiries, to know what &#383;he meant.</p>
+
+<p>"When &#383;he became a little more
+compo&#383;ed, &#383;he took a new&#383;paper out of
+her pocket, declaring, 'that her heart
+&#383;mote her, but what could &#383;he do?&mdash;&#383;he
+mu&#383;t obey her hu&#383;band.' I &#383;natched
+the paper from her. An adverti&#383;ement
+quickly met my eye, purporting,
+that 'Maria Venables had, without
+any a&#383;&#383;ignable cau&#383;e, ab&#383;conded from
+her hu&#383;band; and any per&#383;on harbouring
+her, was menaced with the utmo&#383;t
+&#383;everity of the law.'</p>
+
+<p>"Perfectly acquainted with Mr.
+Venables' meanne&#383;s of &#383;oul, this &#383;tep
+did not excite my &#383;urpri&#383;e, and &#383;carcely
+my contempt. Re&#383;entment in my<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-82_S" id="BPg_2-82_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+brea&#383;t, never &#383;urvived love. I bade
+the poor woman, in a kind tone, wipe
+her eyes, and reque&#383;t her hu&#383;band to
+come up, and &#383;peak to me him&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>"My manner awed him. He re&#383;pected
+a lady, though not a woman;
+and began to mutter out an apology.</p>
+
+<p>"'Mr. Venables was a rich gentleman;
+he wi&#383;hed to oblige me, but he
+had &#383;uffered enough by the law already,
+to tremble at the thought;
+be&#383;ides, for certain, we &#383;hould come
+together again, and then even I &#383;hould
+not thank him for being acce&#383;&#383;ary to
+keeping us a&#383;under.&mdash;A hu&#383;band and
+wife were, God knows, ju&#383;t as one,&mdash;and
+all would come round at la&#383;t.' He
+uttered a drawling 'Hem!' and then
+with an arch look, added&mdash;'Ma&#383;ter
+might have had his little frolics&mdash;but<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-83_S" id="BPg_2-83_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-83.png">83</a>]</span>&mdash;Lord
+ble&#383;s your heart!&mdash;men would
+be men while the world &#383;tands.'</p>
+
+<p>"To argue with this privileged fir&#383;t-born
+of rea&#383;on, I perceived, would be
+vain. I therefore only reque&#383;ted him to
+let me remain another day at his hou&#383;e,
+while I &#383;ought for a lodging; and not
+to inform Mr. Venables that I had ever
+been &#383;heltered there.</p>
+
+<p>"He con&#383;ented, becau&#383;e he had not
+the courage to refu&#383;e a per&#383;on for whom
+he had an habitual re&#383;pect; but I heard
+the pent-up choler bur&#383;t forth in cur&#383;es,
+when he met his wife, who was waiting
+impatiently at the foot of the &#383;tairs,
+to know what effect my expo&#383;tulations
+would have on him.</p>
+
+<p>"Without wa&#383;ting any time in the
+fruitle&#383;s indulgence of vexation, I once
+more &#383;et out in &#383;earch of an abode in<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-84_S" id="BPg_2-84_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-84.png">84</a>]</span>
+which I could hide my&#383;elf for a few
+weeks.</p>
+
+<p>"Agreeing to pay an exorbitant
+price, I hired an apartment, without
+any reference being required relative
+to my character: indeed, a glance
+at my &#383;hape &#383;eemed to &#383;ay, that my
+motive for concealment was &#383;ufficiently
+obvious. Thus was I obliged to &#383;hroud
+my head in infamy.</p>
+
+<p>"To avoid all danger of detection&mdash;I
+u&#383;e the appropriate word, my child,
+for I was hunted out like a felon&mdash;I
+determined to take po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of my
+new lodgings that very evening.</p>
+
+<p>"I did not inform my landlady
+where I was going. I knew that &#383;he
+had a &#383;incere affection for me, and
+would willingly have run any ri&#383;k to
+&#383;how her gratitude; yet I was fully convinced,
+that a few kind words from<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-85_S" id="BPg_2-85_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-85.png">85</a>]</span>
+Johnny would have found the woman
+in her, and her dear benefactre&#383;s, as
+&#383;he termed me in an agony of tears,
+would have been &#383;acrificed, to recompen&#383;e
+her tyrant for conde&#383;cending to
+treat her like an equal. He could be
+kind-hearted, as &#383;he expre&#383;&#383;ed it, when
+he plea&#383;ed. And this thawed &#383;ternne&#383;s,
+contra&#383;ted with his habitual brutality,
+was the more acceptable, and
+could not be purcha&#383;ed at too dear a
+rate.</p>
+
+<p>"The &#383;ight of the adverti&#383;ement
+made me de&#383;irous of taking refuge with
+my uncle, let what would be the con&#383;equence;
+and I repaired in a hackney
+coach (afraid of meeting &#383;ome per&#383;on
+who might chance to know me, had I
+walked) to the chambers of my uncle's
+friend.</p>
+
+<p>"He received me with great polite<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-86_S" id="BPg_2-86_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-86.png">86</a>]</span>ne&#383;s
+(my uncle had already prepo&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed
+him in my favour), and li&#383;tened, with
+intere&#383;t, to my explanation of the
+motives which had induced me to fly
+from home, and &#383;kulk in ob&#383;curity,
+with all the timidity of fear that ought
+only to be the companion of guilt. He
+lamented, with rather more gallantry
+than, in my &#383;ituation, I thought delicate,
+that &#383;uch a woman &#383;hould be
+thrown away on a man in&#383;en&#383;ible to the
+charms of beauty or grace. He &#383;eemed
+at a lo&#383;s what to advi&#383;e me to do, to
+evade my hu&#383;band's &#383;earch, without
+ha&#383;tening to my uncle, whom, he he&#383;itating
+&#383;aid, I might not find alive. He
+uttered this intelligence with vi&#383;ible
+regret; reque&#383;ted me, at lea&#383;t, to wait
+for the arrival of the next packet; offered
+me what money I wanted, and
+promi&#383;ed to vi&#383;it me.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-87_S" id="BPg_2-87_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+"He kept his word; &#383;till no letter
+arrived to put an end to my painful
+&#383;tate of &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e. I procured &#383;ome
+books and mu&#383;ic, to beguile the tedious
+&#383;olitary days.</p>
+
+<div class="poem"><div class="stanza">
+<span class="i0">'Come, ever &#383;miling Liberty,<br /></span>
+<span class="i0">'And with thee bring thy jocund train:'<br /></span>
+</div></div>
+
+<p>I &#383;ung&mdash;and &#383;ung till, &#383;addened by the
+&#383;train of joy, I bitterly lamented the
+fate that deprived me of all &#383;ocial plea&#383;ure.
+Comparative liberty indeed I
+had po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed my&#383;elf of; but the jocund
+train lagged far behind!</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-88_S" id="BPg_2-88_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-88.png">88</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XIII_S" id="BCHAP_XIII_S"></a>CHAP. XIII.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">By</span> watching my only vi&#383;itor, my
+uncle's friend, or by &#383;ome other means,
+Mr. Venables di&#383;covered my re&#383;idence,
+and came to enquire for me. The
+maid-&#383;ervant a&#383;&#383;ured him there was no
+&#383;uch per&#383;on in the hou&#383;e. A bu&#383;tle
+en&#383;ued&mdash;I caught the alarm&mdash;li&#383;tened&mdash;di&#383;tingui&#383;hed
+his voice, and immediately
+locked the door. They &#383;uddenly
+grew &#383;till; and I waited near a
+quarter of an hour, before I heard him
+open the parlour door, and mount the
+&#383;tairs with the mi&#383;tre&#383;s of the hou&#383;e,
+who ob&#383;equiou&#383;ly declared that &#383;he
+knew nothing of me.</p>
+
+<p>"Finding my door locked, &#383;he reque&#383;ted
+me to 'open it, and prepare to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-89_S" id="BPg_2-89_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-89.png">89</a>]</span>
+go home with my hu&#383;band, poor gentleman!
+to whom I had already occa&#383;ioned
+&#383;ufficient vexation.' I made no
+reply. Mr. Venables then, in an a&#383;&#383;umed
+tone of &#383;oftne&#383;s, intreated me,
+'to con&#383;ider what he &#383;uffered, and my
+own reputation, and get the better of
+childi&#383;h re&#383;entment.' He ran on in
+the &#383;ame &#383;train, pretending to addre&#383;s
+me, but evidently adapting his di&#383;cour&#383;e
+to the capacity of the landlady;
+who, at every pau&#383;e, uttered an exclamation
+of pity; or 'Yes, to be &#383;ure&mdash;Very
+true, &#383;ir.'</p>
+
+<p>"Sick of the farce, and perceiving
+that I could not avoid the hated interview,
+I opened the door, and he entered.
+Advancing with ea&#383;y a&#383;&#383;urance
+to take my hand, I &#383;hrunk from his
+touch, with an involuntary &#383;tart, as I
+&#383;hould have done from a noi&#383;ome reptile,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-90_S" id="BPg_2-90_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-90.png">90</a>]</span>
+with more di&#383;gu&#383;t than terror. His
+conductre&#383;s was retiring, to give us, as
+&#383;he &#383;aid, an opportunity to accommodate
+matters. But I bade her come in,
+or I would go out; and curio&#383;ity impelled
+her to obey me.</p>
+
+<p>"Mr. Venables began to expo&#383;tulate;
+and this woman, proud of his
+confidence, to &#383;econd him. But I
+calmly &#383;ilenced her, in the mid&#383;t of a
+vulgar harangue, and turning to him,
+a&#383;ked, 'Why he vainly tormented me?
+declaring that no power on earth
+&#383;hould force me back to his hou&#383;e.'</p>
+
+<p>"After a long altercation, the particulars
+of which, it would be to no
+purpo&#383;e to repeat, he left the room.
+Some time was &#383;pent in loud conver&#383;ation
+in the parlour below, and I
+di&#383;covered that he had brought his
+friend, an attorney, with him.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-91_S" id="BPg_2-91_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-91.png">91</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p>*&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; The tumult on the landing
+place, brought out a gentleman, who
+had recently taken apartments in the
+hou&#383;e; he enquired why I was thus
+a&#383;&#383;ailed<a name="BFNanchor_91-A_7_S" id="BFNanchor_91-A_7_S"></a><a href="#BFootnote_91-A_7_S" class="fnanchor">[91-A]</a>? The voluble attorney in&#383;tantly
+repeated the trite tale. The
+&#383;tranger turned to me, ob&#383;erving,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-92_S" id="BPg_2-92_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-92.png">92</a>]</span>
+with the mo&#383;t &#383;oothing politene&#383;s and
+manly intere&#383;t, that 'my countenance
+told a very different &#383;tory.' He added,
+'that I &#383;hould not be in&#383;ulted, or
+forced out of the hou&#383;e, by any body.'</p>
+
+<p>"'Not by her hu&#383;band?' a&#383;ked the
+attorney.</p>
+
+<p>"'No, &#383;ir, not by her hu&#383;band.' Mr.
+Venables advanced towards him&mdash;But
+there was a deci&#383;ion in his attitude,
+that &#383;o well &#383;econded that of his voice,</p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p class="sp">* * * * * * * * * * * *</p>
+<p>*&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp; They left the hou&#383;e: at
+the &#383;ame time prote&#383;ting, that any one
+that &#383;hould dare to protect me, &#383;hould
+be pro&#383;ecuted with the utmo&#383;t rigour.</p>
+
+<p>"They were &#383;carcely out of the
+hou&#383;e, when my landlady came up to
+me again, and begged my pardon, in
+a very different tone. For, though<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-93_S" id="BPg_2-93_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-93.png">93</a>]</span>
+Mr. Venables had bid her, at her peril,
+harbour me, he had not attended, I
+found, to her broad hints, to di&#383;charge
+the lodging. I in&#383;tantly promi&#383;ed to
+pay her, and make her a pre&#383;ent to
+compen&#383;ate for my abrupt departure,
+if &#383;he would procure me another lodging,
+at a &#383;ufficient di&#383;tance; and &#383;he, in
+return, repeating Mr. Venables' plau&#383;ible
+tale, I rai&#383;ed her indignation, and
+excited her &#383;ympathy, by telling her
+briefly the truth.</p>
+
+<p>"She expre&#383;&#383;ed her commi&#383;eration
+with &#383;uch hone&#383;t warmth, that I felt
+&#383;oothed; for I have none of that fa&#383;tidious
+&#383;en&#383;itivene&#383;s, which a vulgar accent
+or ge&#383;ture can alarm to the di&#383;regard
+of real kindne&#383;s. I was ever glad
+to perceive in others the humane feelings
+I delighted to exerci&#383;e; and the
+recollection of &#383;ome ridiculous charac<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-94_S" id="BPg_2-94_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-94.png">94</a>]</span>teri&#383;tic
+circum&#383;tances, which have occurred
+in a moment of emotion, has
+convul&#383;ed me with laughter, though
+at the in&#383;tant I &#383;hould have thought it
+&#383;acrilegious to have &#383;miled. Your improvement,
+my deare&#383;t girl, being ever
+pre&#383;ent to me while I write, I note
+the&#383;e feelings, becau&#383;e women, more
+accu&#383;tomed to ob&#383;erve manners than
+actions, are too much alive to ridicule.
+So much &#383;o, that their boa&#383;ted &#383;en&#383;ibility
+is often &#383;tifled by fal&#383;e delicacy.
+True &#383;en&#383;ibility, the &#383;en&#383;ibility which
+is the auxiliary of virtue, and the &#383;oul
+of genius, is in &#383;ociety &#383;o occupied
+with the feelings of others, as &#383;carcely
+to regard its own &#383;en&#383;ations. With
+what reverence have I looked up at my
+uncle, the dear parent of my mind!
+when I have &#383;een the &#383;en&#383;e of his own
+&#383;ufferings, of mind and body, ab&#383;orbed<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-95_S" id="BPg_2-95_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+in a de&#383;ire to comfort tho&#383;e, who&#383;e mi&#383;fortunes
+were comparatively trivial.
+He would have been a&#383;hamed of being
+as indulgent to him&#383;elf, as he was to
+others. 'Genuine fortitude,' he would
+a&#383;&#383;ert, 'con&#383;i&#383;ted in governing our own
+emotions, and making allowance for
+the weakne&#383;&#383;es in our friends, that we
+would not tolerate in our&#383;elves.' But
+where is my fond regret leading me!</p>
+
+<p>"'Women mu&#383;t be &#383;ubmi&#383;&#383;ive,' &#383;aid
+my landlady. 'Indeed what could
+mo&#383;t women do? Who had they to
+maintain them, but their hu&#383;bands?
+Every woman, and e&#383;pecially a lady,
+could not go through rough and
+&#383;mooth, as &#383;he had done, to earn a little
+bread.'</p>
+
+<p>"She was in a talking mood, and
+proceeded to inform me how &#383;he had
+been u&#383;ed in the world. 'She knew<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-96_S" id="BPg_2-96_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-96.png">96</a>]</span>
+what it was to have a bad hu&#383;band, or
+&#383;he did not know who &#383;hould.' I perceived
+that &#383;he would be very much
+mortified, were I not to attend to her
+tale, and I did not attempt to interrupt
+her, though I wi&#383;hed her, as &#383;oon
+as po&#383;&#383;ible, to go out in &#383;earch of a new
+abode for me, where I could once more
+hide my head.</p>
+
+<p>"She began by telling me, 'That
+&#383;he had &#383;aved a little money in &#383;ervice;
+and was over-per&#383;uaded (we mu&#383;t all
+be in love once in our lives) to marry a
+likely man, a footman in the family,
+not worth a groat. My plan,' &#383;he continued,
+'was to take a hou&#383;e, and let
+out lodgings; and all went on well,
+till my hu&#383;band got acquainted with
+an impudent &#383;lut, who cho&#383;e to live on
+other people's means&mdash;and then all
+went to rack and ruin. He ran in<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-97_S" id="BPg_2-97_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-97.png">97</a>]</span>
+debt to buy her fine clothes, &#383;uch
+clothes as I never thought of wearing
+my&#383;elf, and&mdash;would you believe it?&mdash;he
+&#383;igned an execution on my very
+goods, bought with the money I
+worked &#383;o hard to get; and they came
+and took my bed from under me, before
+I heard a word of the matter.
+Aye, madam, the&#383;e are mi&#383;fortunes
+that you gentlefolks know nothing of,&mdash;but
+&#383;orrow is &#383;orrow, let it come
+which way it will.</p>
+
+<p>"'I &#383;ought for a &#383;ervice again&mdash;very
+hard, after having a hou&#383;e of my own!&mdash;but
+he u&#383;ed to follow me, and kick up
+&#383;uch a riot when he was drunk, that I
+could not keep a place; nay, he even
+&#383;tole my clothes, and pawned them;
+and when I went to the pawnbroker's,
+and offered to take my oath that they
+were not bought with a farthing of his<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-98_S" id="BPg_2-98_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-98.png">98</a>]</span>
+money, they &#383;aid, 'It was all as one,
+my hu&#383;band had a right to whatever I
+had.'</p>
+
+<p>"'At la&#383;t he li&#383;ted for a &#383;oldier, and
+I took a hou&#383;e, making an agreement
+to pay for the furniture by degrees;
+and I almo&#383;t &#383;tarved my&#383;elf, till I once
+more got before-hand in the world.</p>
+
+<p>"'After an ab&#383;ence of &#383;ix years
+(God forgive me! I thought he was
+dead) my hu&#383;band returned; found me
+out, and came with &#383;uch a penitent
+face, I forgave him, and clothed him
+from head to foot. But he had not
+been a week in the hou&#383;e, before &#383;ome
+of his creditors arre&#383;ted him; and, he
+&#383;elling my goods, I found my&#383;elf once
+more reduced to beggary; for I was
+not as well able to work, go to bed
+late, and ri&#383;e early, as when I quitted
+&#383;ervice; and then I thought it hard<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-99_S" id="BPg_2-99_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-99.png">99</a>]</span>
+enough. He was &#383;oon tired of me,
+when there was nothing more to be
+had, and left me again.</p>
+
+<p>"<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing quotation mark">'</ins>I will not tell you how I was buffeted
+about, till, hearing for certain
+that he had died in an ho&#383;pital abroad,
+I once more returned to my old occupation;
+but have not yet been able to
+get my head above water: &#383;o, madam,
+you mu&#383;t not be angry if I am afraid to
+run any ri&#383;k, when I know &#383;o well,
+that women have always the wor&#383;t of
+it, when law is to decide.'</p>
+
+<p>"After uttering a few more complaints,
+I prevailed on my landlady to
+go out in que&#383;t of a lodging; and, to
+be more &#383;ecure, I conde&#383;cended to the
+mean &#383;hift of changing my name.</p>
+
+<p>"But why &#383;hould I dwell on &#383;imilar
+incidents!&mdash;I was hunted, like an infected
+bea&#383;t, from three different apartments,
+and &#383;hould not have been al<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-100_S" id="BPg_2-100_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-100.png">100</a>]</span>lowed
+to re&#383;t in any, had not Mr. Venables,
+informed of my uncle's dangerous
+&#383;tate of health, been in&#383;pired with
+the fear of hurrying me out of the
+world as I advanced in my pregnancy,
+by thus tormenting and obliging me to
+take &#383;udden journeys to avoid him; and
+then his &#383;peculations on my uncle's fortune
+mu&#383;t prove abortive.</p>
+
+<p>"One day, when he had pur&#383;ued me
+to an inn, I fainted, hurrying from him;
+and, falling down, the &#383;ight of my blood
+alarmed him, and obtained a re&#383;pite for
+me. It is &#383;trange that he &#383;hould have
+retained any hope, after ob&#383;erving my
+unwavering determination; but, from
+the mildne&#383;s of my behaviour, when I
+found all my endeavours to change his
+di&#383;po&#383;ition unavailing, he formed an
+erroneous opinion of my character, imagining
+that, were we once more together,
+I &#383;hould part with the money he<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-101_S" id="BPg_2-101_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-101.png">101</a>]</span>
+could not legally force from me, with
+the &#383;ame facility as formerly. My forbearance
+and occa&#383;ional &#383;ympathy he
+had mi&#383;taken for weakne&#383;s of character;
+and, becau&#383;e he perceived that I
+di&#383;liked re&#383;i&#383;tance, he thought my indulgence
+and compa&#383;&#383;ion mere &#383;elfi&#383;hne&#383;s,
+and never di&#383;covered that the fear of
+being unju&#383;t, or of unnece&#383;&#383;arily wounding
+the feelings of another, was much
+more painful to me, than any thing I
+could have to endure my&#383;elf. Perhaps
+it was pride which made me imagine,
+that I could bear what I dreaded to inflict;
+and that it was often ea&#383;ier to &#383;uffer,
+than to &#383;ee the &#383;ufferings of others.</p>
+
+<p>"I forgot to mention that, during
+this per&#383;ecution, I received a letter
+from my uncle, informing me, 'that
+he only found relief from continual
+change of air; and that he intended to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-102_S" id="BPg_2-102_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+return when the &#383;pring was a little more
+advanced (it was now the middle of
+February), and then we would plan a
+journey to Italy, leaving the fogs and
+cares of England far behind.' He approved
+of my conduct, promi&#383;ed to
+adopt my child, and &#383;eemed to have
+no doubt of obliging Mr. Venables to
+hear rea&#383;on. He wrote to his friend,
+by the &#383;ame po&#383;t, de&#383;iring him to call
+on Mr. Venables in his name; and, in
+con&#383;equence of the remon&#383;trances he
+dictated, I was permitted to lie-in tranquilly.</p>
+
+<p>"The two or three weeks previous, I
+had been allowed to re&#383;t in peace; but,
+&#383;o accu&#383;tomed was I to pur&#383;uit and
+alarm, that I &#383;eldom clo&#383;ed my eyes
+without being haunted by Mr. Venables'
+image, who &#383;eemed to a&#383;&#383;ume terrific or
+hateful forms to torment me, wherever<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-103_S" id="BPg_2-103_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-103.png">103</a>]</span>
+I turned.&mdash;Sometimes a wild cat, a
+roaring bull, or hideous a&#383;&#383;a&#383;&#383;in, whom
+I vainly attempted to fly; at others he
+was a demon, hurrying me to the brink
+of a precipice, plunging me into dark
+waves, or horrid gulfs; and I woke,
+in violent fits of trembling anxiety, to
+a&#383;&#383;ure my&#383;elf that it was all a dream,
+and to endeavour to lure my waking
+thoughts to wander to the delightful
+Italian vales, I hoped &#383;oon to vi&#383;it; or
+to picture &#383;ome augu&#383;t ruins, where I
+reclined in fancy on a mouldering column,
+and e&#383;caped, in the contemplation
+of the heart-enlarging virtues of antiquity,
+from the turmoil of cares that
+had depre&#383;&#383;ed all the daring purpo&#383;es
+of my &#383;oul. But I was not long allowed
+to calm my mind by the exerci&#383;e
+of my imagination; for the third
+day after your birth, my child, I was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-104_S" id="BPg_2-104_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+&#383;urpri&#383;ed by a vi&#383;it from my elder brother;
+who came in the mo&#383;t abrupt
+manner, to inform me of the death of
+my uncle. He had left the greater
+part of his fortune to my child, appointing
+me its guardian; in &#383;hort,
+every &#383;tep was taken to enable me to
+be mi&#383;tre&#383;s of his fortune, without putting
+any part of it in Mr. Venables'
+power. My brother came to vent his
+rage on me, for having, as he expre&#383;&#383;ed
+him&#383;elf, 'deprived him, my uncle's
+elde&#383;t nephew, of his inheritance;'
+though my uncle's property, the fruit
+of his own exertion, being all in the
+funds, or on landed &#383;ecurities, there
+was not a &#383;hadow of ju&#383;tice in the
+charge.</p>
+
+<p>"As I &#383;incerely loved my uncle, this
+intelligence brought on a fever, which
+I &#383;truggled to conquer with all the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-105_S" id="BPg_2-105_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-105.png">105</a>]</span>
+energy of my mind; for, in my de&#383;olate
+&#383;tate, I had it very much at heart to
+&#383;uckle you, my poor babe. You
+&#383;eemed my only tie to life, a cherub,
+to whom I wi&#383;hed to be a father, as
+well as a mother; and the double duty
+appeared to me to produce a proportionate
+increa&#383;e of affection. But the
+plea&#383;ure I felt, while &#383;u&#383;taining you,
+&#383;natched from the wreck of hope, was
+cruelly damped by melancholy reflections
+on my widowed &#383;tate&mdash;widowed
+by the death of my uncle. Of Mr.
+Venables I thought not, even when I
+thought of the felicity of loving your
+father, and how a mother's plea&#383;ure
+might be exalted, and her care &#383;oftened
+by a hu&#383;band's tenderne&#383;s.&mdash;'Ought to
+be!' I exclaimed; and I endeavoured
+to drive away the tenderne&#383;s that &#383;uffo<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-106_S" id="BPg_2-106_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-106.png">106</a>]</span>cated
+me; but my &#383;pirits were weak,
+and the unbidden tears would flow.
+'Why was I,' I would a&#383;k thee, but
+thou did&#383;t not heed me,&mdash;'cut off from
+the participation of the &#383;weete&#383;t plea&#383;ure
+of life?' I imagined with what
+extacy, after the pains of child-bed, I
+&#383;hould have pre&#383;ented my little &#383;tranger,
+whom I had &#383;o long wi&#383;hed to view, to
+a re&#383;pectable father, and with what
+maternal fondne&#383;s I &#383;hould have pre&#383;&#383;ed
+them both to my heart!&mdash;Now I ki&#383;&#383;ed
+her with le&#383;s delight, though with the
+mo&#383;t endearing compa&#383;&#383;ion, poor helple&#383;s
+one! when I perceived a &#383;light re&#383;emblance
+of him, to whom &#383;he owed
+her exi&#383;tence; or, if any ge&#383;ture reminded
+me of him, even in his be&#383;t
+days, my heart heaved, and I pre&#383;&#383;ed
+the innocent to my bo&#383;om, as if to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-107_S" id="BPg_2-107_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-107.png">107</a>]</span>
+purify it&mdash;yes, I blu&#383;hed to think that
+its purity had been &#383;ullied, by allowing
+&#383;uch a man to be its father.</p>
+
+<p>"After my recovery, I began to
+think of taking a hou&#383;e in the country,
+or of making an excur&#383;ion on the continent,
+to avoid Mr. Venables; and to
+open my heart to new plea&#383;ures and
+affection. The &#383;pring was melting into
+&#383;ummer, and you, my little companion,
+began to &#383;mile&mdash;that &#383;mile
+made hope bud out afre&#383;h, a&#383;&#383;uring me
+the world was not a de&#383;ert. Your
+ge&#383;tures were ever pre&#383;ent to my
+fancy; and I dwelt on the joy I &#383;hould
+feel when you would begin to walk and
+li&#383;p. Watching your wakening mind,
+and &#383;hielding from every rude bla&#383;t
+my tender blo&#383;&#383;om, I recovered my
+&#383;pirits&mdash;I dreamed not of the fro&#383;t<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-108_S" id="BPg_2-108_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-108.png">108</a>]</span>&mdash;'the
+killing fro&#383;t,' to which you were
+de&#383;tined to be expo&#383;ed.&mdash;But I lo&#383;e all
+patience&mdash;and execrate the inju&#383;tice
+of the world&mdash;folly! ignorance!&mdash;I
+&#383;hould rather call it; but, &#383;hut up from
+a free circulation of thought, and always
+pondering on the &#383;ame griefs, I
+writhe under the torturing apprehen&#383;ions,
+which ought to excite only
+hone&#383;t indignation, or active compa&#383;&#383;ion;
+and would, could I view them
+as the natural con&#383;equence of things.
+But, born a woman&mdash;and born to &#383;uffer,
+in endeavouring to repre&#383;s my own
+emotions, I feel more acutely the various
+ills my &#383;ex are fated to bear&mdash;I
+feel that the evils they are &#383;ubject to
+endure, degrade them &#383;o far below
+their oppre&#383;&#383;ors, as almo&#383;t to ju&#383;tify
+their tyranny; leading at the &#383;ame<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-109_S" id="BPg_2-109_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-109.png">109</a>]</span>
+time &#383;uperficial rea&#383;oners to term that
+weakne&#383;s the cau&#383;e, which is only
+the con&#383;equence of &#383;hort-&#383;ighted de&#383;poti&#383;m.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_91-A_7_S" id="BFootnote_91-A_7_S"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_91-A_7_S"><span class="label">[91-A]</span></a> The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer
+of Maria, in an early &#383;tage of the hi&#383;tory, is already
+&#383;tated (Chap. III.) to have been an after-thought
+of the author. This has probably cau&#383;ed
+the imperfectne&#383;s of the manu&#383;cript in the above
+pa&#383;&#383;age; though, at the &#383;ame time, it mu&#383;t be acknowledged
+to be &#383;omewhat uncertain, whether
+Darnford is the &#383;tranger intended in this place.
+It appears from Chap. XVII. that an interference
+of a more deci&#383;ive nature was de&#383;igned to be attributed
+to him.</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-110_S" id="BPg_2-110_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-110.png">110</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XIV_S" id="BCHAP_XIV_S"></a>CHAP. XIV.</h2>
+
+
+<p>"<span class="smcap">As</span> my mind grew calmer, the
+vi&#383;ions of Italy again returned with
+their former glow of colouring; and I
+re&#383;olved on quitting the kingdom for
+a time, in &#383;earch of the cheerfulne&#383;s,
+that naturally re&#383;ults from a change of
+&#383;cene, unle&#383;s we carry the barbed arrow
+with us, and only &#383;ee what we
+feel.</p>
+
+<p>"During the period nece&#383;&#383;ary to
+prepare for a long ab&#383;ence, I &#383;ent a
+&#383;upply to pay my father's debts, and
+&#383;ettled my brothers in eligible &#383;ituations;
+but my attention was not
+wholly engro&#383;&#383;ed by my family, though
+I do not think it nece&#383;&#383;ary to enumerate
+the common exertions of huma<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-111_S" id="BPg_2-111_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-111.png">111</a>]</span>nity.
+The manner in which my uncle's
+property was &#383;ettled, prevented
+me from making the addition to the
+fortune of my &#383;urviving &#383;i&#383;ter, that I
+could have wi&#383;hed; but I had prevailed
+on him to bequeath her two
+thou&#383;and pounds, and &#383;he determined
+to marry a lover, to whom &#383;he had
+been &#383;ome time attached. Had it not
+been for this engagement, I &#383;hould have
+invited her to accompany me in my
+tour; and I might have e&#383;caped the
+pit, &#383;o artfully dug in my path, when
+I was the lea&#383;t aware of danger.</p>
+
+<p>"I had thought of remaining in
+England, till I weaned my child; but
+this &#383;tate of freedom was too peaceful
+to la&#383;t, and I had &#383;oon rea&#383;on to wi&#383;h
+to ha&#383;ten my departure. A friend of
+Mr. Venables, the &#383;ame attorney who
+had accompanied him in &#383;everal excur<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-112_S" id="BPg_2-112_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-112.png">112</a>]</span>&#383;ions
+to hunt me from my hiding places,
+waited on me to propo&#383;e a reconciliation.
+On my refu&#383;al, he indirectly
+advi&#383;ed me to make over to my hu&#383;band&mdash;for
+hu&#383;band he would term
+him&mdash;the greater part of the property
+I had at command, menacing me with
+continual per&#383;ecution unle&#383;s I complied,
+and that, as a la&#383;t re&#383;ort, he
+would claim the child. I did not,
+though intimidated by the la&#383;t in&#383;inuation,
+&#383;cruple to declare, that I would
+not allow him to &#383;quander the money
+left to me for far different purpo&#383;es,
+but offered him five hundred pounds, if
+he would &#383;ign a bond not to torment
+me any more. My maternal anxiety
+made me thus appear to waver from
+my fir&#383;t determination, and probably
+&#383;ugge&#383;ted to him, or his diabolical<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-113_S" id="BPg_2-113_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-113.png">113</a>]</span>
+agent, the infernal plot, which has
+&#383;ucceeded but too well.</p>
+
+<p>"The bond was executed; &#383;till I
+was impatient to leave England. Mi&#383;chief
+hung in the air when we breathed
+the &#383;ame; I wanted &#383;eas to divide
+us, and waters to roll between, till he
+had forgotten that I had the means of
+helping him through a new &#383;cheme.
+Di&#383;turbed by the late occurrences, I in&#383;tantly
+prepared for my departure.
+My only delay was waiting for a maid-&#383;ervant,
+who &#383;poke French fluently,
+and had been warmly recommended to
+me. A valet I was advi&#383;ed to hire,
+when I fixed on my place of re&#383;idence
+for any time.</p>
+
+<p>"My God, with what a light heart
+did I &#383;et out for Dover!&mdash;It was not my
+country, but my cares, that I was leaving
+behind. My heart &#383;eemed to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-114_S" id="BPg_2-114_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+bound with the wheels, or rather appeared
+the centre on which they twirled.
+I cla&#383;ped you to my bo&#383;om, exclaiming
+'And you will be &#383;afe&mdash;quite
+&#383;afe&mdash;when&mdash;we are once on
+board the packet.&mdash;Would we were
+there!' I &#383;miled at my idle fears, as
+the natural effect of continual alarm;
+and I &#383;carcely owned to my&#383;elf that I
+dreaded Mr. Venables's cunning, or
+was con&#383;cious of the horrid delight he
+would feel, at forming &#383;tratagem after
+&#383;tratagem to circumvent me. I was
+already in the &#383;nare&mdash;I never reached
+the packet&mdash;I never &#383;aw thee more.&mdash;I
+grow breathle&#383;s. I have &#383;carcely patience
+to write down the details. The
+maid&mdash;the plau&#383;ible woman I had
+hired&mdash;put, doubtle&#383;s, &#383;ome &#383;tupifying
+potion in what I ate or drank, the
+morning I left town. All I know is,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-115_S" id="BPg_2-115_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+that &#383;he mu&#383;t have quitted the chai&#383;e,
+&#383;hamele&#383;s wretch! and taken (from
+my brea&#383;t) my babe with her. How
+could a creature in a female form &#383;ee
+me care&#383;s thee, and &#383;teal thee from my
+arms! I mu&#383;t &#383;top, &#383;top to repre&#383;s a
+mother's angui&#383;h; left, in bitterne&#383;s of
+&#383;oul, I imprecate the wrath of heaven
+on this tiger, who tore my only comfort
+from me.</p>
+
+<p>"How long I &#383;lept I know not;
+certainly many hours, for I woke at the
+clo&#383;e of day, in a &#383;trange confu&#383;ion of
+thought. I was probably rou&#383;ed to recollection
+by &#383;ome one thundering at a
+huge, unwieldy gate. Attempting to
+a&#383;k where I was, my voice died away,
+and I tried to rai&#383;e it in vain, as I have
+done in a dream. I looked for my babe
+with affright; feared that it had fallen
+out of my lap, while I had &#383;o &#383;trange<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-116_S" id="BPg_2-116_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-116.png">116</a>]</span>ly
+forgotten her; and, &#383;uch was the
+vague intoxication, I can give it no
+other name, in which I was plunged,
+I could not recollect when or where I
+la&#383;t &#383;aw you; but I &#383;ighed, as if my
+heart wanted room to clear my head.</p>
+
+<p>"The gates opened heavily, and
+the &#383;ullen &#383;ound of many locks
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'and and'">and</ins> bolts drawn back, grated on
+my very &#383;oul, before I was appalled by
+the creeking of the di&#383;mal hinges, as
+they clo&#383;ed after me. The gloomy
+pile was before me, half in ruins; &#383;ome
+of the aged trees of the avenue were
+cut down, and left to rot where they
+fell; and as we approached &#383;ome
+mouldering &#383;teps, a mon&#383;trous dog
+darted forwards to the length of his
+chain, and barked and growled infernally.</p>
+
+<p>"The door was opened &#383;lowly, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-117_S" id="BPg_2-117_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+a murderous vi&#383;age peeped out, with a
+lantern. 'Hu&#383;h!' he uttered, in a
+threatning tone, and the affrighted
+animal &#383;tole back to his kennel. The
+door of the chai&#383;e flew back, the
+&#383;tranger put down the lantern, and
+cla&#383;ped his dreadful arms around me.
+It was certainly the effect of the &#383;oporific
+draught, for, in&#383;tead of exerting
+my &#383;trength, I &#383;unk without motion,
+though not without &#383;en&#383;e, on his &#383;houlder,
+my limbs refu&#383;ing to obey my
+will. I was carried up the &#383;teps into a
+clo&#383;e-&#383;hut hall. A candle flaring in
+the &#383;ocket, &#383;carcely di&#383;per&#383;ed the darkne&#383;s,
+though it di&#383;played to me the
+ferocious countenance of the wretch
+who held me.</p>
+
+<p>"He mounted a wide &#383;tairca&#383;e.
+Large figures painted on the walls
+&#383;eemed to &#383;tart on me, and glaring<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-118_S" id="BPg_2-118_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+eyes to meet me at every turn. Entering
+a long gallery, a di&#383;mal &#383;hriek made
+me &#383;pring out of my conductor's arms,
+with I know not what my&#383;terious emotion
+of terror; but I fell on the floor,
+unable to &#383;u&#383;tain my&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>"A &#383;trange-looking female &#383;tarted
+out of one of the rece&#383;&#383;es, and ob&#383;erved
+me with more curio&#383;ity than intere&#383;t;
+till, &#383;ternly bid retire, &#383;he flitted back
+like a &#383;hadow. Other faces, &#383;trongly
+marked, or di&#383;torted, peeped through
+the half-opened doors, and I heard
+&#383;ome incoherent &#383;ounds. I had no
+di&#383;tinct idea where I could be&mdash;I looked
+on all &#383;ides, and almo&#383;t doubted whether
+I was alive or dead.</p>
+
+<p>"Thrown on a bed, I immediately
+&#383;unk into in&#383;en&#383;ibility again; and next
+day, gradually recovering the u&#383;e of
+rea&#383;on, I began, &#383;tarting affrighted<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-119_S" id="BPg_2-119_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-119.png">119</a>]</span>
+from the conviction, to di&#383;cover where
+I was confined&mdash;I in&#383;i&#383;ted on &#383;eeing the
+ma&#383;ter of the man&#383;ion&mdash;I &#383;aw him&mdash;and
+perceived that I was buried alive.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>"Such, my child, are the events of
+thy mother's life to this dreadful moment&mdash;Should
+&#383;he ever e&#383;cape from
+the fangs of her enemies, &#383;he will add
+the &#383;ecrets of her pri&#383;on-hou&#383;e&mdash;and&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>Some lines were here cro&#383;&#383;ed out,
+and the memoirs broke off abruptly
+with the names of Jemima and Darnford.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-120_S" id="BPg_2-120_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-120.png">120</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BAPPENDIX_S" id="BAPPENDIX_S"></a>APPENDIX.</h2>
+<hr class="short" />
+<h3>[ADVERTISEMENT.</h3>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> performance, with a fragment
+of which the reader has now been pre&#383;ented,
+was de&#383;igned to con&#383;i&#383;t of three
+parts. The preceding &#383;heets were
+con&#383;idered as con&#383;tituting one of tho&#383;e
+parts. Tho&#383;e per&#383;ons who in the
+peru&#383;al of the chapters, already written
+and in &#383;ome degree fini&#383;hed by the au<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-121_S" id="BPg_2-121_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-121.png">121</a>]</span>thor,
+have felt their hearts awakened,
+and their curio&#383;ity excited as to the
+&#383;equel of the &#383;tory, will, of cour&#383;e,
+gladly accept even of the broken paragraphs
+and half-fini&#383;hed &#383;entences,
+which have been found committed
+to paper, as materials for the
+remainder. The fa&#383;tidious and cold-hearted
+critic may perhaps feel him&#383;elf
+repelled by the incoherent form in
+which they are pre&#383;ented. But an inqui&#383;itive
+temper willingly accepts the
+mo&#383;t imperfect and mutilated information,
+where better is not to be had:
+and readers, who in any degree re&#383;emble
+the author in her quick apprehen&#383;ion
+of &#383;entiment, and of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-122_S" id="BPg_2-122_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-122.png">122</a>]</span>
+plea&#383;ures and pains of imagination,
+will, I believe, find gratification, in
+contemplating &#383;ketches, which were
+de&#383;igned in a &#383;hort time to have received
+the fini&#383;hing touches of her
+genius; but which mu&#383;t now for ever
+remain a mark to record the triumphs
+of mortality, over &#383;chemes of u&#383;efulne&#383;s,
+and projects of public intere&#383;t.]</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-123_S" id="BPg_2-123_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-123.png">123</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XV_S" id="BCHAP_XV_S"></a>CHAP. XV.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Darnford</span> returned the memoirs
+to Maria, with a mo&#383;t affectionate
+letter, in which he rea&#383;oned on "the
+ab&#383;urdity of the laws re&#383;pecting matrimony,
+which, till divorces could be
+more ea&#383;ily obtained, was," he declared,
+"the mo&#383;t in&#383;ufferable bondage. Ties of
+this nature could not bind minds governed
+by &#383;uperior principles; and &#383;uch
+beings were privileged to act above the
+dictates of laws they had no voice in
+framing, if they had &#383;ufficient &#383;trength
+of mind to endure the natural con&#383;equence.
+In her ca&#383;e, to talk of duty,
+was a farce, excepting what was due
+to her&#383;elf. Delicacy, as well as rea&#383;on,
+forbade her ever to think of returning<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-124_S" id="BPg_2-124_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-124.png">124</a>]</span>
+to her hu&#383;band: was &#383;he then to re&#383;train
+her charming &#383;en&#383;ibility through
+mere prejudice? The&#383;e arguments
+were not ab&#383;olutely impartial, for he
+di&#383;dained to conceal, that, when he
+appealed to her rea&#383;on, he felt that
+he had &#383;ome intere&#383;t in her heart.&mdash;The
+conviction was not more tran&#383;porting,
+than &#383;acred&mdash;a thou&#383;and times a
+day, he a&#383;ked him&#383;elf how he had merited
+&#383;uch happine&#383;s?&mdash;and as often he
+determined to purify the heart &#383;he
+deigned to inhabit&mdash;He intreated to be
+again admitted to her pre&#383;ence."</p>
+
+<p>He was; and the tear which gli&#383;tened
+in his eye, when he re&#383;pectfully
+pre&#383;&#383;ed her to his bo&#383;om, rendered him
+peculiarly dear to the unfortunate mother.
+Grief had &#383;tilled the tran&#383;ports
+of love, only to render their mutual
+tenderne&#383;s more touching. In former<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-125_S" id="BPg_2-125_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+interviews, Darnford had contrived, by
+a hundred little pretexts, to &#383;it near
+her, to take her hand, or to meet her
+eyes&mdash;now it was all &#383;oothing affection,
+and e&#383;teem &#383;eemed to have rivalled
+love. He adverted to her narrative,
+and &#383;poke with warmth of the oppre&#383;&#383;ion
+&#383;he had endured.&mdash;His eyes, glowing
+with a lambent flame, told her
+how much he wi&#383;hed to re&#383;tore her to
+liberty and love; but he ki&#383;&#383;ed her
+hand, as if it had been that of a &#383;aint;
+and &#383;poke of the lo&#383;s of her child, as if it
+had been his own.&mdash;What could have
+been more flattering to Maria?&mdash;Every
+in&#383;tance of &#383;elf-denial was regi&#383;tered in
+her heart, and &#383;he loved him, for loving
+her too well to give way to the
+tran&#383;ports of pa&#383;&#383;ion.</p>
+
+<p>They met again and again; and
+Darnford declared, while pa&#383;&#383;ion &#383;uf<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-126_S" id="BPg_2-126_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-126.png">126</a>]</span>fu&#383;ed
+his cheeks, that he never before
+knew what it was to love.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>One morning Jemima informed
+Maria, that her ma&#383;ter intended to
+wait on her, and &#383;peak to her without
+witne&#383;&#383;es. He came, and brought a
+letter with him, pretending that he
+was ignorant of its contents, though he
+in&#383;i&#383;ted on having it returned to him.
+It was from the attorney already mentioned,
+who informed her of the death
+of her child, and hinted, "that &#383;he
+could not now have a legitimate heir,
+and that, would &#383;he make over the
+half of her fortune during life, &#383;he
+&#383;hould be conveyed to Dover, and permitted
+to pur&#383;ue her plan of travelling."</p>
+
+<p>Maria an&#383;wered with warmth,
+"That &#383;he had no terms to make with
+the murderer of her babe, nor would<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-127_S" id="BPg_2-127_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-127.png">127</a>]</span>
+&#383;he purcha&#383;e liberty at the price of her
+own re&#383;pect."</p>
+
+<p>She began to expo&#383;tulate with her
+jailor; but he &#383;ternly bade her "Be
+&#383;ilent&mdash;he had not gone &#383;o far, not to
+go further."</p>
+
+<p>Darnford came in the evening.
+Jemima was obliged to be ab&#383;ent, and
+&#383;he, as u&#383;ual, locked the door on them,
+to prevent interruption or di&#383;covery.&mdash;The
+lovers were, at fir&#383;t, embarra&#383;&#383;ed;
+but fell in&#383;en&#383;ibly into confidential di&#383;cour&#383;e.
+Darnford repre&#383;ented, "that
+they might &#383;oon be parted," and wi&#383;hed
+her "to put it out of the power of fate
+to &#383;eparate them."</p>
+
+<p>As her hu&#383;band &#383;he now received him,
+and he &#383;olemnly pledged him&#383;elf as her
+protector&mdash;and eternal friend.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>There was one peculiarity in Maria's
+mind: &#383;he was more anxious not
+to deceive, than to guard again&#383;t de<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-128_S" id="BPg_2-128_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-128.png">128</a>]</span>ception;
+and had rather tru&#383;t without
+&#383;ufficient rea&#383;on, than be for ever the
+prey of doubt. Be&#383;ides, what are we,
+when the mind has, from reflection, a
+certain kind of elevation, which exalts
+the contemplation above the little concerns
+of prudence! We &#383;ee what we
+wi&#383;h, and make a world of our own&mdash;and,
+though reality may &#383;ometimes open
+a door to mi&#383;ery, yet the moments of
+happine&#383;s procured by the imagination,
+may, without a paradox, be reckoned
+among the &#383;olid comforts of life. Maria
+now, imagining that &#383;he had found
+a being of cele&#383;tial mould&mdash;was happy,&mdash;nor
+was &#383;he deceived.&mdash;He was then
+pla&#383;tic in her impa&#383;&#383;ioned hand&mdash;and
+reflected all the &#383;entiments which animated
+and warmed her.&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-129_S" id="BPg_2-129_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-129.png">129</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XVI_S" id="BCHAP_XVI_S"></a>CHAP. XVI.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">One</span> morning confu&#383;ion &#383;eemed to
+reign in the hou&#383;e, and Jemima came
+in terror, to inform Maria, "that her
+ma&#383;ter had left it, with a determination,
+&#383;he was a&#383;&#383;ured (and too many
+circum&#383;tances corroborated the opinion,
+to leave a doubt of its truth) of never
+returning. I am prepared then,"
+&#383;aid Jemima, "to accompany you in
+your flight."</p>
+
+<p>Maria &#383;tarted up, her eyes darting
+towards the door, as if afraid that &#383;ome
+one &#383;hould fa&#383;ten it on her for ever.</p>
+
+<p>Jemima continued, "I have perhaps
+no right now to expect the performance
+of your promi&#383;e; but on you<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-130_S" id="BPg_2-130_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-130.png">130</a>]</span>
+it depends to reconcile me with the
+human race."</p>
+
+<p>"But Darnford!"&mdash;exclaimed Maria,
+mournfully&mdash;&#383;itting down again,
+and cro&#383;&#383;ing her arms&mdash;"I have no
+child to go to, and liberty has lo&#383;t its
+&#383;weets."</p>
+
+<p>"I am much mi&#383;taken, if Darnford
+is not the cau&#383;e of my ma&#383;ter's flight&mdash;his
+keepers a&#383;&#383;ure me, that they have
+promi&#383;ed to confine him two days
+longer, and then he will be free&mdash;you
+cannot &#383;ee him; but they will give a
+letter to him the moment he is free.&mdash;In
+that inform him where he may find
+you in London; fix on &#383;ome hotel.
+Give me your clothes; I will &#383;end them
+out of the hou&#383;e with mine, and we
+will &#383;lip out at the garden-gate. Write
+your letter while I make the&#383;e arrangements,
+but lo&#383;e no time!"</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-131_S" id="BPg_2-131_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-131.png">131</a>]</span>
+In an agitation of &#383;pirit, not to be
+calmed, Maria began to write to Darnford.
+She called him by the &#383;acred
+name of "hu&#383;band," and bade him "ha&#383;ten
+to her, to &#383;hare her fortune, or &#383;he
+would return to him."&mdash;An hotel in the
+Adelphi was the place of rendezvous.</p>
+
+<p>The letter was &#383;ealed and given in
+charge; and with light foot&#383;teps, yet
+terrified at the &#383;ound of them, &#383;he de&#383;cended,
+&#383;carcely breathing, and with
+an indi&#383;tinct fear that &#383;he &#383;hould never
+get out at the garden gate. Jemima
+went fir&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>A being, with a vi&#383;age that would
+have &#383;uited one po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed by a devil,
+cro&#383;&#383;ed the path, and &#383;eized Maria by
+the arm. Maria had no fear but of being
+detained&mdash;"Who are you? what
+are you?" for the form was &#383;carcely human.
+"If you are made of fle&#383;h and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-132_S" id="BPg_2-132_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-132.png">132</a>]</span>
+blood," his gha&#383;tly eyes glared on her,
+"do not &#383;top me!"</p>
+
+<p>"Woman," interrupted a &#383;epulchral
+voice, "what have I to do with thee?"&mdash;Still
+he gra&#383;ped her hand, muttering
+a cur&#383;e.</p>
+
+<p>"No, no; you have nothing to do
+with me," &#383;he exclaimed, "this is a
+moment of life and death!"&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>With &#383;upernatural force &#383;he broke
+from him, and, throwing her arms
+round Jemima, cried, "Save me!" The
+being, from who&#383;e gra&#383;p &#383;he had loo&#383;ed
+her&#383;elf, took up a &#383;tone as they opened
+the door, and with a kind of helli&#383;h
+&#383;port threw it after them. They were
+out of his reach.</p>
+
+<p>When Maria arrived in town, &#383;he
+drove to the hotel already fixed on. But
+&#383;he could not &#383;it &#383;till&mdash;her child was ever
+before her; and all that had pa&#383;&#383;ed dur<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-133_S" id="BPg_2-133_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-133.png">133</a>]</span>ing
+her confinement, appeared to be a
+dream. She went to the hou&#383;e in the
+&#383;uburbs, where, as &#383;he now di&#383;covered,
+her babe had been &#383;ent. The moment
+&#383;he entered, her heart grew &#383;ick; but
+&#383;he wondered not that it had proved its
+grave. She made the nece&#383;&#383;ary enquiries,
+and the church-yard was pointed
+out, in which it re&#383;ted under a turf. A
+little frock which the nur&#383;e's child
+wore (Maria had made it her&#383;elf)
+caught her eye. The nur&#383;e was glad
+to &#383;ell it for half-a-guinea, and Maria
+ha&#383;tened away with the relic, and, re-entering
+the hackney-coach which
+waited for her, gazed on it, till &#383;he
+reached her hotel.</p>
+
+<p>She then waited on the attorney
+who had made her uncle's will, and explained
+to him her &#383;ituation. He readily
+advanced her &#383;ome of the money<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-134_S" id="BPg_2-134_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-134.png">134</a>]</span>
+which &#383;till remained in his hands, and
+promi&#383;ed to take the whole of the ca&#383;e
+into con&#383;ideration. Maria only wi&#383;hed
+to be permitted to remain in quiet&mdash;She
+found that &#383;everal bills, apparently
+with her &#383;ignature, had been pre&#383;ented
+to her agent, nor was &#383;he for a moment
+at a lo&#383;s to gue&#383;s by whom they had
+been forged; yet, equally aver&#383;e to
+threaten or intreat, &#383;he reque&#383;ted her
+friend [the &#383;olicitor] to call on Mr. Venables.
+He was not to be found at
+home; but at length his agent, the attorney,
+offered a conditional promi&#383;e to
+Maria, to leave her in peace, as long as
+&#383;he behaved with propriety, if &#383;he
+would give up the notes. Maria incon&#383;iderately
+con&#383;ented&mdash;Darnford was
+arrived, and &#383;he wi&#383;hed to be only alive
+to love; &#383;he wi&#383;hed to forget the angui&#383;h
+&#383;he felt whenever &#383;he thought of
+her child.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-135_S" id="BPg_2-135_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-135.png">135</a>]</span>
+They took a ready furni&#383;hed lodging
+together, for &#383;he was above di&#383;gui&#383;e;
+Jemima in&#383;i&#383;ting on being con&#383;idered
+as her hou&#383;e-keeper, and to receive
+the cu&#383;tomary &#383;tipend. On no
+other terms would &#383;he remain with her
+friend.</p>
+
+<p>Darnford was indefatigable in tracing
+the my&#383;terious circum&#383;tances of
+his confinement. The cau&#383;e was &#383;imply,
+that a relation, a very di&#383;tant one,
+to whom he was heir, had died inte&#383;tate,
+leaving a con&#383;iderable fortune.
+On the news of Darnford's arrival [in
+England, a per&#383;on, intru&#383;ted with the
+management of the property, and who
+had the writings in his po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion, determining,
+by one bold &#383;troke, to &#383;trip
+Darnford of the &#383;ucce&#383;&#383;ion,] had planned
+his confinement; and [as &#383;oon
+as he had taken the mea&#383;ures he<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-136_S" id="BPg_2-136_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-136.png">136</a>]</span>
+judged mo&#383;t conducive to his object,
+this ruffian, together with his in&#383;trument,]
+the keeper of the private mad-hou&#383;e,
+left the kingdom. Darnford,
+who &#383;till pur&#383;ued his enquiries, at la&#383;t
+di&#383;covered that they had fixed their
+place of refuge at Paris.</p>
+
+<p>Maria and he determined therefore,
+with the faithful Jemima, to vi&#383;it
+that metropolis, and accordingly were
+preparing for the journey, when they
+were informed that Mr. Venables had
+commenced an action again&#383;t Darnford
+for &#383;eduction and adultery. The indignation
+Maria felt cannot be explained;
+&#383;he repented of the forbearance &#383;he had
+exerci&#383;ed in giving up the notes. Darnford
+could not put off his journey, without
+ri&#383;king the lo&#383;s of his property:
+Maria therefore furni&#383;hed him with money
+for his expedition; and determined<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-137_S" id="BPg_2-137_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-137.png">137</a>]</span>
+to remain in London till the termination
+of this affair.</p>
+
+<p>She vi&#383;ited &#383;ome ladies with whom
+&#383;he had formerly been intimate, but
+was refu&#383;ed admittance; and at the
+opera, or Ranelagh, they could not recollect
+her. Among the&#383;e ladies there
+were &#383;ome, not her mo&#383;t intimate acquaintance,
+who were generally &#383;uppo&#383;ed
+to avail them&#383;elves of the cloke
+of marriage, to conceal a mode of conduct,
+that would for ever have damned
+their fame, had they been innocent, &#383;educed
+girls. The&#383;e particularly &#383;tood
+aloof.&mdash;Had &#383;he remained with her hu&#383;band,
+practi&#383;ing in&#383;incerity, and neglecting
+her child to manage an intrigue,
+&#383;he would &#383;till have been vi&#383;ited
+and re&#383;pected. If, in&#383;tead of
+openly living with her lover, &#383;he could
+have conde&#383;cended to call into play a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-138_S" id="BPg_2-138_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-138.png">138</a>]</span>
+thou&#383;and arts, which, degrading her
+own mind, might have allowed the
+people who were not deceived, to pretend
+to be &#383;o, &#383;he would have been
+care&#383;&#383;ed and treated like an honourable
+woman. "And Brutus<a name="BFNanchor_138-A_8_S" id="BFNanchor_138-A_8_S"></a><a href="#BFootnote_138-A_8_S" class="fnanchor">[138-A]</a> is an honourable
+man!" &#383;aid Mark-Antony with
+equal &#383;incerity.</p>
+
+<p>With Darnford &#383;he did not ta&#383;te uninterrupted
+felicity; there was a volatility
+in his manner which often di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ed
+her; but love gladdened the
+&#383;cene; be&#383;ides, he was the mo&#383;t tender,
+&#383;ympathizing creature in the world.
+A fondne&#383;s for the &#383;ex often gives an
+appearance of humanity to the behaviour
+of men, who have &#383;mall preten&#383;ions
+to the reality; and they &#383;eem to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-139_S" id="BPg_2-139_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-139.png">139</a>]</span>
+love others, when they are only pur&#383;uing
+their own gratification. Darnford
+appeared ever willing to avail him&#383;elf
+of her ta&#383;te and acquirements, while
+&#383;he endeavoured to profit by his deci&#383;ion
+of character, and to eradicate &#383;ome
+of the romantic notions, which had
+taken root in her mind, while in adver&#383;ity
+&#383;he had brooded over vi&#383;ions of
+unattainable bli&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>The real affections of life, when
+they are allowed to bur&#383;t forth, are buds
+pregnant with joy and all the &#383;weet
+emotions of the &#383;oul; yet they branch
+out with wild ea&#383;e, unlike the artificial
+forms of felicity, &#383;ketched by an imagination
+painful alive. The &#383;ub&#383;tantial
+happine&#383;s, which enlarges and civilizes
+the mind, may be compared to
+the plea&#383;ure experienced in roving
+through nature at large, inhaling the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-140_S" id="BPg_2-140_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-140.png">140</a>]</span>
+&#383;weet gale natural to the clime; while
+the reveries of a feveri&#383;h imagination
+continually &#383;port them&#383;elves in gardens
+full of aromatic &#383;hrubs, which cloy
+while they delight, and weaken the
+&#383;en&#383;e of plea&#383;ure they gratify. The heaven
+of fancy, below or beyond the &#383;tars,
+in this life, or in tho&#383;e ever-&#383;miling regions
+&#383;urrounded by the unmarked
+ocean of futurity, have an in&#383;ipid uniformity
+which palls. Poets have imagined
+&#383;cenes of bli&#383;s; but, fencing out
+&#383;orrow, all the extatic emotions of the
+&#383;oul, and even its grandeur, &#383;eem to
+be equally excluded. We do&#383;e over
+the unruffled lake, and long to &#383;cale
+the rocks which fence the happy valley
+of contentment, though &#383;erpents hi&#383;s
+in the pathle&#383;s de&#383;ert, and danger lurks
+in the unexplored wiles. Maria found
+her&#383;elf more indulgent as &#383;he was hap<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-141_S" id="BPg_2-141_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-141.png">141</a>]</span>pier,
+and di&#383;covered virtues, in characters
+&#383;he had before di&#383;regarded, while
+cha&#383;ing the phantoms of elegance and
+excellence, which &#383;ported in the meteors
+that exhale in the mar&#383;hes of mi&#383;fortune.
+The heart is often &#383;hut by
+romance again&#383;t &#383;ocial plea&#383;ure; and,
+fo&#383;tering a &#383;ickly &#383;en&#383;ibility, grows callous
+to the &#383;oft touches of humanity.</p>
+
+<p>To part with Darnford was indeed
+cruel.&mdash;It was to feel mo&#383;t painfully
+alone; but &#383;he rejoiced to think, that
+&#383;he &#383;hould &#383;pare him the care and perplexity
+of the &#383;uit, and meet him again,
+all his own. Marriage, as at pre&#383;ent
+con&#383;tituted, &#383;he con&#383;idered as leading
+to immorality&mdash;yet, as the odium of
+&#383;ociety impedes u&#383;efulne&#383;s, &#383;he wi&#383;hed to
+avow her affection to Darnford, by becoming
+his wife according to e&#383;tabli&#383;hed
+rules; not to be confounded<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-142_S" id="BPg_2-142_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-142.png">142</a>]</span>
+with women who act from very different
+motives, though her conduct would
+be ju&#383;t the &#383;ame without the ceremony
+as with it, and her expectations from
+him not le&#383;s firm. The being &#383;ummoned
+to defend her&#383;elf from a charge which
+&#383;he was determined to plead guilty to,
+was &#383;till galling, as it rou&#383;ed bitter reflections
+on the &#383;ituation of women in
+&#383;ociety.</p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_138-A_8_S" id="BFootnote_138-A_8_S"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_138-A_8_S"><span class="label">[138-A]</span></a> The name in the manu&#383;cript is by mi&#383;take
+written C&aelig;&#383;ar.</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-143_S" id="BPg_2-143_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-143.png">143</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCHAP_XVII_S" id="BCHAP_XVII_S"></a>CHAP. XVII.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Such</span> was her &#383;tate of mind when
+the dogs of law were let loo&#383;e on
+her. Maria took the ta&#383;k of conducting
+Darnford's defence upon her&#383;elf.
+She in&#383;tructed his coun&#383;el to plead
+guilty to the charge of adultery; but
+to deny that of &#383;eduction.</p>
+
+<p>The coun&#383;el for the plaintiff opened
+the cau&#383;e, by ob&#383;erving, "that his client
+had ever been an indulgent hu&#383;band,
+and had borne with &#383;everal defects
+of temper, while he had nothing
+criminal to lay to the charge of his
+wife. But that &#383;he left his hou&#383;e without
+a&#383;&#383;igning any cau&#383;e. He could not
+a&#383;&#383;ert that &#383;he was then acquainted
+with the defendant; yet, when he was<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-144_S" id="BPg_2-144_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-144.png">144</a>]</span>
+once endeavouring to bring her back
+to her home, this man put the peace-officers
+to flight, and took her he knew
+not whither. After the birth of her child,
+her conduct was &#383;o &#383;trange, and a melancholy
+malady having afflicted one of
+the family, which delicacy forbade the
+dwelling on, it was nece&#383;&#383;ary to confine
+her. By &#383;ome means the defendant
+enabled her to make her e&#383;cape,
+and they had lived together, in de&#383;pite
+of all &#383;en&#383;e of order and decorum. The
+adultery was allowed, it was not nece&#383;&#383;ary
+to bring any witne&#383;&#383;es to prove it;
+but the &#383;eduction, though highly probable
+from the circum&#383;tances which
+he had the honour to &#383;tate, could not
+be &#383;o clearly proved.&mdash;It was of the
+mo&#383;t atrocious kind, as decency was &#383;et
+at defiance, and re&#383;pect for reputa<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-145_S" id="BPg_2-145_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-145.png">145</a>]</span>tion,
+which &#383;hows internal compunction,
+utterly di&#383;regarded."</p>
+
+<p>A &#383;trong &#383;en&#383;e of inju&#383;tice had &#383;ilenced
+every emotion, which a mixture
+of true and fal&#383;e delicacy might otherwi&#383;e
+have excited in Maria's bo&#383;om.
+She only felt in earne&#383;t to in&#383;i&#383;t on the
+privilege of her nature. The &#383;arca&#383;ms
+of &#383;ociety, and the condemnation of a
+mi&#383;taken world, were nothing to her,
+compared with acting contrary to tho&#383;e
+feelings which were the foundation of
+her principles. [She therefore eagerly
+put her&#383;elf forward, in&#383;tead of de&#383;iring
+to be ab&#383;ent, on this memorable occa&#383;ion.]</p>
+
+<p>Convinced that the &#383;ubterfuges of
+the law were di&#383;graceful, &#383;he wrote a
+paper, which &#383;he expre&#383;&#383;ly de&#383;ired might
+be read in court:</p>
+
+<p>"Married when &#383;carcely able to di&#383;<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-146_S" id="BPg_2-146_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-146.png">146</a>]</span>tingui&#383;h
+the nature of the engagement,
+I yet &#383;ubmitted to the rigid
+laws which en&#383;lave women, and obeyed
+the man whom I could no longer love.
+Whether the duties of the &#383;tate are
+reciprocal, I mean not to di&#383;cu&#383;s; but
+I can prove repeated infidelities which
+I overlooked or pardoned. Witne&#383;&#383;es
+are not wanting to e&#383;tabli&#383;h the&#383;e facts.
+I at pre&#383;ent maintain the child of a
+maid &#383;ervant, &#383;worn to him, and born
+after our marriage. I am ready to allow,
+that education and circum&#383;tances
+lead men to think and act with le&#383;s delicacy,
+than the pre&#383;ervation of order
+in &#383;ociety demands from women; but
+&#383;urely I may without a&#383;&#383;umption declare,
+that, though I could excu&#383;e the
+birth, I could not the de&#383;ertion of this
+unfortunate babe:&mdash;and, while I de&#383;pi&#383;ed
+the man, it was not ea&#383;y to ve<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-147_S" id="BPg_2-147_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-147.png">147</a>]</span>nerate
+the hu&#383;band. With proper re&#383;trictions
+however, I revere the in&#383;titution
+which fraternizes the world. I exclaim
+again&#383;t the laws which throw the
+whole weight of the yoke on the weaker
+&#383;houlders, and force women, when they
+claim protector&#383;hip as mothers, to &#383;ign
+a contract, which renders them dependent
+on the caprice of the tyrant, whom
+choice or nece&#383;&#383;ity has appointed to
+reign over them. Various are the ca&#383;es,
+in which a woman ought to &#383;eparate
+her&#383;elf from her hu&#383;band; and mine,
+I may be allowed emphatically to in&#383;i&#383;t,
+comes under the de&#383;cription of the
+mo&#383;t aggravated.</p>
+
+<p>"I will not enlarge on tho&#383;e provocations
+which only the individual can
+e&#383;timate; but will bring forward &#383;uch
+charges only, the truth of which is an
+in&#383;ult upon humanity. In order to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-148_S" id="BPg_2-148_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+promote certain de&#383;tructive &#383;peculations,
+Mr. Venables prevailed on me
+to borrow certain &#383;ums of a wealthy relation;
+and, when I refu&#383;ed further
+compliance, he thought of bartering
+my per&#383;on; and not only allowed opportunities
+to, but urged, a friend
+from whom he borrowed money, to
+&#383;educe me. On the di&#383;covery of this
+act of atrocity, I determined to leave
+him, and in the mo&#383;t decided manner,
+for ever. I con&#383;ider all obligation as
+made void by his conduct; and hold,
+that &#383;chi&#383;ms which proceed from want
+of principles, can never be healed.</p>
+
+<p>"He received a fortune with me to
+the amount of five thou&#383;and pounds. On
+the death of my uncle, convinced that
+I could provide for my child, I de&#383;troyed
+the &#383;ettlement of that fortune.
+I required none of my property to be<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-149_S" id="BPg_2-149_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+returned to me, nor &#383;hall enumerate the
+&#383;ums extorted from me during &#383;ix years
+that we lived together.</p>
+
+<p>"After leaving, what the law con&#383;iders
+as my home, I was hunted like a criminal
+from place to place, though I
+contracted no debts, and demanded no
+maintenance&mdash;yet, as the laws &#383;anction
+&#383;uch proceeding, and make women the
+property of their hu&#383;bands, I forbear
+to animadvert. After the birth of my
+daughter, and the death of my uncle,
+who left a very con&#383;iderable property
+to my&#383;elf and child, I was expo&#383;ed to
+new per&#383;ecution; and, becau&#383;e I had,
+before arriving at what is termed years
+of di&#383;cretion, pledged my faith, I was
+treated by the world, as bound for ever
+to a man who&#383;e vices were notorious.
+Yet what are the vices generally
+known, to the various mi&#383;eries that a<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-150_S" id="BPg_2-150_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+woman may be &#383;ubject to, which,
+though deeply felt, eating into the
+&#383;oul, elude de&#383;cription, and may be
+glo&#383;&#383;ed over! A fal&#383;e morality is even
+e&#383;tabli&#383;hed, which makes all the virtue
+of women con&#383;i&#383;t in cha&#383;tity, &#383;ubmi&#383;&#383;ion,
+and the forgivene&#383;s of injuries.</p>
+
+<p>"I pardon my oppre&#383;&#383;or&mdash;bitterly as I
+lament the lo&#383;s of my child, torn from
+me in the mo&#383;t violent manner. But
+nature revolts, and my &#383;oul &#383;ickens at
+the bare &#383;uppo&#383;ition, that it could ever
+be a duty to pretend affection, when a
+&#383;eparation is nece&#383;&#383;ary to prevent my
+feeling hourly aver&#383;ion.</p>
+
+<p>"To force me to give my fortune, I
+was impri&#383;oned&mdash;yes; in a private mad-hou&#383;e.&mdash;There,
+in the heart of mi&#383;ery,
+I met the man charged with &#383;educing
+me. We became attached&mdash;I deemed,
+and ever &#383;hall deem, my&#383;elf free. The<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-151_S" id="BPg_2-151_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-151.png">151</a>]</span>
+death of my babe di&#383;&#383;olved the only tie
+which &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;ted between me and my,
+what is termed, lawful hu&#383;band.</p>
+
+<p>"To this per&#383;on, thus encountered,
+I voluntarily gave my&#383;elf, never con&#383;idering
+my&#383;elf as any more bound to
+tran&#383;gre&#383;s the laws of moral purity,
+becau&#383;e the will of my hu&#383;band
+might be pleaded in my excu&#383;e, than
+to tran&#383;gre&#383;s tho&#383;e laws to which
+[the policy of artificial &#383;ociety has]
+annexed [po&#383;itive] puni&#383;hments.&mdash;&mdash;While
+no command of a hu&#383;band can
+prevent a woman from &#383;uffering for
+certain crimes, &#383;he mu&#383;t be allowed
+to con&#383;ult her con&#383;cience, and regulate
+her conduct, in &#383;ome degree, by her
+own &#383;en&#383;e of right. The re&#383;pect I owe
+to my&#383;elf, demanded my &#383;trict adherence
+to my determination of never
+viewing Mr. Venables in the light of a
+hu&#383;band, nor could it forbid me from<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-152_S" id="BPg_2-152_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-152.png">152</a>]</span>
+encouraging another. If I am unfortunately
+united to an unprincipled man,
+am I for ever to be &#383;hut out from fulfilling
+the duties of a wife and mother?&mdash;I
+wi&#383;h my country to approve of my
+conduct; but, if laws exi&#383;t, made by
+the &#383;trong to oppre&#383;s the weak, I appeal
+to my own &#383;en&#383;e of ju&#383;tice, and
+declare that I will not live with the
+individual, who has violated every moral
+obligation which binds man to man.</p>
+
+<p>"I prote&#383;t equally again&#383;t any charge
+being brought to criminate the man,
+whom I con&#383;ider as my hu&#383;band. I
+was &#383;ix-and-twenty when I left Mr.
+Venables' roof; if ever I am to be &#383;uppo&#383;ed
+to arrive at an age to direct my
+own actions, I mu&#383;t by that time have
+arrived at it.&mdash;I acted with deliberation.&mdash;Mr.
+Darnford found me a forlorn
+and oppre&#383;&#383;ed woman, and promi&#383;ed<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-153_S" id="BPg_2-153_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-153.png">153</a>]</span>
+the protection women in the pre&#383;ent
+&#383;tate of &#383;ociety want.&mdash;But the man
+who now claims me&mdash;was he deprived
+of my &#383;ociety by this conduct? The
+que&#383;tion is an in&#383;ult to common &#383;en&#383;e,
+con&#383;idering where Mr. Darnford met
+me.&mdash;Mr. Venables' door was indeed
+open to me&mdash;nay, threats and intreaties
+were u&#383;ed to induce me to return; but
+why? Was affection or honour the
+motive?&mdash;I cannot, it is true, dive into
+the rece&#383;&#383;es of the human heart&mdash;yet
+I pre&#383;ume to a&#383;&#383;ert, [borne out as
+I am by a variety of circum&#383;tances,]
+that he was merely influenced by the
+mo&#383;t rapacious avarice.</p>
+
+<p>"I claim then a divorce, and the
+liberty of enjoying, free from mole&#383;tation,
+the fortune left to me by a relation,
+who was well aware of the character
+of the man with whom I had to<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-154_S" id="BPg_2-154_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+contend.&mdash;I appeal to the ju&#383;tice and
+humanity of the jury&mdash;a body of men,
+who&#383;e private judgment mu&#383;t be allowed
+to modify laws, that mu&#383;t be
+unju&#383;t, becau&#383;e definite rules can never
+apply to indefinite circum&#383;tances&mdash;and
+I deprecate puni&#383;hment upon the man
+of my choice, freeing him, as I &#383;olemnly
+do, from the charge of &#383;eduction.]</p>
+
+<p>"I did not put my&#383;elf into a &#383;ituation
+to ju&#383;tify a charge of adultery, till
+I had, from conviction, &#383;haken off the
+fetters which bound me to Mr. Venables.&mdash;While
+I lived with him, I defy
+the voice of calumny to &#383;ully what is
+termed the fair fame of woman.&mdash;Neglected
+by my hu&#383;band, I never encouraged
+a lover; and pre&#383;erved with
+&#383;crupulous care, what is termed my
+honour, at the expence of my peace,
+till he, who &#383;hould have been its guar<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-155_S" id="BPg_2-155_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-155.png">155</a>]</span>dian,
+laid traps to en&#383;nare me. From
+that moment I believed my&#383;elf, in the
+&#383;ight of heaven, free&mdash;and no power
+on earth &#383;hall force me to renounce my
+re&#383;olution."</p>
+
+<p>The judge, in &#383;umming up the evidence,
+alluded to "the fallacy of letting
+women plead their feelings, as an excu&#383;e
+for the violation of the marriage-vow.
+For his part, he had always
+determined to oppo&#383;e all innovation,
+and the new-fangled notions which incroached
+on the good old rules of conduct.
+We did not want French principles
+in public or private life&mdash;and, if
+women were allowed to plead their
+feelings, as an excu&#383;e or palliation of
+infidelity, it was opening a flood-gate
+for immorality. What virtuous woman
+thought of her feelings?&mdash;It was
+her duty to love and obey the man<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-156_S" id="BPg_2-156_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-156.png">156</a>]</span>
+cho&#383;en by her parents and relations,
+who were qualified by their experience
+to judge better for her, than &#383;he could
+for her&#383;elf. As to the charges brought
+again&#383;t the hu&#383;band, they were vague,
+&#383;upported by no witne&#383;&#383;es, excepting
+that of impri&#383;onment in a private mad-hou&#383;e.
+The proofs of an in&#383;anity in the
+family, might render that however a
+prudent mea&#383;ure; and indeed the conduct
+of the lady did not appear that of
+a per&#383;on of &#383;ane mind. Still &#383;uch a
+mode of proceeding could not be ju&#383;tified,
+and might perhaps entitle the
+lady [in another court] to a &#383;entence of
+&#383;eparation from bed and board, during
+the joint lives of the parties; but he
+hoped that no Engli&#383;hman would legalize
+adultery, by enabling the adultere&#383;s
+to enrich her &#383;educer. Too many re&#383;trictions
+could not be thrown in the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-157_S" id="BPg_2-157_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-157.png">157</a>]</span>
+way of divorces, if we wi&#383;hed to maintain
+the &#383;anctity of marriage; and,
+though they might bear a little hard on
+a few, very few individuals, it was
+evidently for the good of the whole."</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-158_S" id="BPg_2-158_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-158.png">158</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="BCONCLUSION_S" id="BCONCLUSION_S"></a>CONCLUSION,</h2>
+
+<h3>BY THE EDITOR.</h3>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Very</span> few hints exi&#383;t re&#383;pecting the
+plan of the remainder of the work. I
+find only two detached &#383;entences, and
+&#383;ome &#383;cattered heads for the continuation
+of the &#383;tory. I tran&#383;cribe the
+whole.</p>
+
+<p class="center">I.</p>
+
+<p>"Darnford's letters were affectionate;
+but circum&#383;tances occa&#383;ioned delays,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-159_S" id="BPg_2-159_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-159.png">159</a>]</span>
+and the mi&#383;carriage of &#383;ome letters
+rendered the reception of wi&#383;hed-for
+an&#383;wers doubtful: his return was nece&#383;&#383;ary
+to calm Maria's mind."</p>
+
+<p class="center">II.</p>
+
+<p>"As Darnford had informed her that
+his bu&#383;ine&#383;s was &#383;ettled, his delaying to
+return &#383;eemed extraordinary; but love
+to exce&#383;s, excludes fear or &#383;u&#383;picion."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>The &#383;cattered heads for the continuation
+of the &#383;tory, are as follow<a name="BFNanchor_159-A_9_S" id="BFNanchor_159-A_9_S"></a><a href="#BFootnote_159-A_9_S" class="fnanchor">[159-A]</a>.</p>
+
+<p class="center">I.</p>
+
+<p>"Trial for adultery&mdash;Maria defends
+her&#383;elf&mdash;A &#383;eparation from bed and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-160_S" id="BPg_2-160_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-160.png">160</a>]</span>
+board is the con&#383;equence&mdash;Her fortune
+is thrown into chancery&mdash;Darnford obtains
+a part of his property&mdash;Maria
+goes into the country."</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">II.</p>
+
+<p>"A pro&#383;ecution for adultery commenced&mdash;Trial&mdash;Darnford
+&#383;ets out for
+France&mdash;Letters&mdash;Once more pregnant&mdash;He
+returns&mdash;My&#383;terious behaviour&mdash;Vi&#383;it&mdash;Expectation&mdash;Di&#383;covery&mdash;Interview&mdash;Con&#383;equence."</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">III.</p>
+
+<p>"Sued by her hu&#383;band&mdash;Damages
+awarded to him&mdash;Separation from bed
+and board&mdash;Darnford goes abroad&mdash;Maria
+into the country&mdash;Provides for
+her father&mdash;Is &#383;hunned&mdash;Returns to
+London&mdash;Expects to &#383;ee her lover<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-161_S" id="BPg_2-161_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-161.png">161</a>]</span>&mdash;The
+rack of expectation&mdash;Finds her&#383;elf
+again with child&mdash;Delighted&mdash;A di&#383;covery&mdash;A
+vi&#383;it&mdash;A mi&#383;carriage&mdash;Conclu&#383;ion."</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">IV.</p>
+
+<p>"Divorced by her hu&#383;band&mdash;Her
+lover unfaithful&mdash;Pregnancy&mdash;Mi&#383;carriage&mdash;Suicide."</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>[The following pa&#383;&#383;age appears in
+&#383;ome re&#383;pects to deviate from the preceding
+hints. It is &#383;uper&#383;cribed]</p>
+
+
+<h5>"THE END.</h5>
+
+
+<p>"She &#383;wallowed the laudanum; her
+&#383;oul was calm&mdash;the tempe&#383;t had &#383;ub<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-162_S" id="BPg_2-162_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-162.png">162</a>]</span>&#383;ided&mdash;and
+nothing remained but an
+eager longing to forget her&#383;elf&mdash;to
+fly from the angui&#383;h &#383;he endured
+to e&#383;cape from thought&mdash;from this
+hell of di&#383;appointment.</p>
+
+<p>"Still her eyes clo&#383;ed not&mdash;one remembrance
+with frightful velocity followed
+another&mdash;All the incidents of
+her life were in arms, embodied to
+a&#383;&#383;ail her, and prevent her &#383;inking
+into the &#383;leep of death.&mdash;Her murdered
+child again appeared to her,
+mourning for the babe of which &#383;he
+was the tomb.&mdash;'And could it have
+a nobler?&mdash;Surely it is better to die
+with me, than to enter on life without
+a mother's care!&mdash;I cannot live!&mdash;but
+could I have de&#383;erted my child the
+moment it was born?&mdash;thrown it on
+the troubled wave of life, without
+a hand to &#383;upport it?'&mdash;She looked<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-163_S" id="BPg_2-163_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+up: 'What have I not &#383;uffered!&mdash;may
+I find a father where I am going!'&mdash;Her
+head turned; a &#383;tupor en&#383;ued;
+a faintne&#383;s&mdash;'Have a little patience,'
+&#383;aid Maria, holding her &#383;wimming
+head (&#383;he thought of her mother),
+'this cannot la&#383;t long; and what is a
+little bodily pain to the pangs I have
+endured?'</p>
+
+<p>"A new vi&#383;ion &#383;wam before her.
+Jemima &#383;eemed to enter&mdash;leading a little
+creature, that, with tottering foot&#383;teps,
+approached the bed. The voice
+of Jemima &#383;ounding as at a di&#383;tance,
+called her&mdash;&#383;he tried to li&#383;ten, to &#383;peak,
+to look!</p>
+
+<p>"'Behold your child!' exclaimed
+Jemima. Maria &#383;tarted off the bed,
+and fainted.&mdash;Violent vomiting followed.</p>
+
+<p>"When &#383;he was re&#383;tored to life, Je<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-164_S" id="BPg_2-164_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-164.png">164</a>]</span>mima
+addre&#383;&#383;ed her with great &#383;olemnity:
+'&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; led me to &#383;u&#383;pect,
+that your hu&#383;band and brother had
+deceived you, and &#383;ecreted the child.
+I would not torment you with doubtful
+hopes, and I left you (at a fatal
+moment) to &#383;earch for the child!&mdash;I
+&#383;natched her from mi&#383;ery&mdash;and (now
+&#383;he is alive again) would you leave
+her alone in the world, to endure what
+I have endured?'</p>
+
+<p>"Maria gazed wildly at her, her
+whole frame was convul&#383;ed with emotion;
+when the child, whom Jemima
+had been tutoring all the journey, uttered
+the word 'Mamma!' She
+caught her to her bo&#383;om, and bur&#383;t
+into a pa&#383;&#383;ion of tears&mdash;then, re&#383;ting
+the child gently on the bed, as if
+afraid of killing it,&mdash;&#383;he put her hand
+to her eyes, to conceal as it were the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-165_S" id="BPg_2-165_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+agonizing &#383;truggle of her &#383;oul. She
+remained &#383;ilent for five minutes, cro&#383;&#383;ing
+her arms over her bo&#383;om, and reclining
+her head,&mdash;then exclaimed:
+'The conflict is over!&mdash;I will live for
+my child!'"</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p>A few readers perhaps, in looking
+over the&#383;e hints, will wonder how it
+could have been practicable, without
+tediou&#383;ne&#383;s, or remitting in any degree
+the intere&#383;t of the &#383;tory, to have filled,
+from the&#383;e &#383;light &#383;ketches, a number of
+pages, more con&#383;iderable than tho&#383;e
+which have been already pre&#383;ented.
+But, in reality, the&#383;e hints, &#383;imple as
+they are, are pregnant with pa&#383;&#383;ion and
+di&#383;tre&#383;s. It is the refuge of barren au<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-166_S" id="BPg_2-166_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-166.png">166</a>]</span>thors
+only, to crowd their fictions with
+&#383;o great a number of events, as to &#383;uffer
+no one of them to &#383;ink into the reader's
+mind. It is the province of true genius
+to develop events, to di&#383;cover their
+capabilities, to a&#383;certain the different
+pa&#383;&#383;ions and &#383;entiments with which they
+are fraught, and to diver&#383;ify them with
+incidents, that give reality to the picture,
+and take a hold upon the mind of a
+reader of ta&#383;te, from which they can
+never be loo&#383;ened. It was particularly
+the de&#383;ign of the author, in the pre&#383;ent
+in&#383;tance, to make her &#383;tory &#383;ubordinate
+to a great moral purpo&#383;e, that "of exhibiting
+the mi&#383;ery and oppre&#383;&#383;ion, peculiar
+to women, that ari&#383;e out of the
+partial laws and cu&#383;toms of &#383;ociety.&mdash;This
+view re&#383;trained her fancy<a name="BFNanchor_166-A_10_S" id="BFNanchor_166-A_10_S"></a><a href="#BFootnote_166-A_10_S" class="fnanchor">[166-A]</a>." It<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-167_S" id="BPg_2-167_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-167.png">167</a>]</span>
+was nece&#383;&#383;ary for her, to place in a &#383;triking
+point of view, evils that are too
+frequently overlooked, and to drag into
+light tho&#383;e details of oppre&#383;&#383;ion, of
+which the gro&#383;&#383;er and more in&#383;en&#383;ible
+part of mankind make little account.</p>
+
+
+<h4>THE END.</h4>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_159-A_9_S" id="BFootnote_159-A_9_S"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_159-A_9_S"><span class="label">[159-A]</span></a> To under&#383;tand the&#383;e minutes, it is nece&#383;&#383;ary
+the reader &#383;hould con&#383;ider each of them as &#383;etting
+out from the &#383;ame point in the &#383;tory, <i>viz.</i> the point
+to which it is brought down in the preceding
+chapter.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_166-A_10_S" id="BFootnote_166-A_10_S"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_166-A_10_S"><span class="label">[166-A]</span></a> See author's preface.</p></div>
+</div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-168_S" id="BPg_2-168_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-168.png">168</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-169_S" id="BPg_2-169_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-169.png">169</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="BLESSONS_S" id="BLESSONS_S"></a>LESSONS.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-170_S" id="BPg_2-170_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-170.png">170</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-171_S" id="BPg_2-171_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-171.png">171</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>ADVERTISEMENT,</h2>
+
+<h3>BY THE EDITOR.</h3>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> following pages will, I believe,
+be judged by every reader of ta&#383;te to
+have been worth pre&#383;erving, among
+the other te&#383;timonies the author left
+behind her, of her genius and the
+&#383;oundne&#383;s of her under&#383;tanding. To<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-172_S" id="BPg_2-172_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-172.png">172</a>]</span>
+&#383;uch readers I leave the ta&#383;k of comparing
+the&#383;e le&#383;&#383;ons, with other works
+of the &#383;ame nature previou&#383;ly publi&#383;hed.
+It is obvious that the author has &#383;truck
+out a path of her own, and by no means
+intrenched upon the plans of her predece&#383;&#383;ors.</p>
+
+<p>It may however excite &#383;urpri&#383;e in
+&#383;ome per&#383;ons to find the&#383;e papers annexed
+to the conclu&#383;ion of a novel. All
+I have to offer on this &#383;ubject, con&#383;i&#383;ts
+in the following con&#383;iderations:</p>
+
+<p>Fir&#383;t, &#383;omething is to be allowed for
+the difficulty of arranging the mi&#383;cellaneous
+papers upon very different &#383;ub<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-173_S" id="BPg_2-173_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-173.png">173</a>]</span>jects,
+which will frequently con&#383;titute
+an author's po&#383;thumous works.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p>Secondly, the &#383;mall portion they occupy
+in the pre&#383;ent volume, will perhaps
+be accepted as an apology, by
+&#383;uch good-natured readers (if any &#383;uch
+there are), to whom the peru&#383;al of
+them &#383;hall be a matter of perfect indifference.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p>Thirdly, the circum&#383;tance which
+determined me in annexing them to
+the pre&#383;ent work, was the &#383;light a&#383;&#383;ociation
+(in default of a &#383;trong one)
+between the affectionate and pathetic
+manner in which Maria Venables ad<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-174_S" id="BPg_2-174_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-174.png">174</a>]</span>dre&#383;&#383;es
+her infant, in the Wrongs of
+Woman; and the agoni&#383;ing and painful
+&#383;entiment with which the author
+originally bequeathed the&#383;e papers, as
+a legacy for the benefit of her child.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-175_S" id="BPg_2-175_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-175.png">175</a>]</span></p>
+<h2>LESSONS.</h2>
+
+<p><i>The fir&#383;t book of a &#383;eries which I intended to
+have written for my unfortunate girl<a name="BFNanchor_175-A_11_S" id="BFNanchor_175-A_11_S"></a><a href="#BFootnote_175-A_11_S" class="fnanchor">[175-A]</a>.</i></p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON I.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Cat.</span> Dog. Cow. Hor&#383;e. Sheep.
+Pig. Bird. Fly.</p>
+
+<p>Man. Boy. Girl. Child.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-176_S" id="BPg_2-176_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-176.png">176</a>]</span>
+Head. Hair. Face. No&#383;e. Mouth.
+Chin. Neck. Arms. Hand. Leg.
+Foot. Back. Brea&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>Hou&#383;e. Wall. Field. Street. Stone.
+Gra&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>Bed. Chair. Door. Pot. Spoon.
+Knife. Fork. Plate. Cup. Box.
+Boy. Bell.</p>
+
+<p>Tree. Leaf. Stick. Whip. Cart.
+Coach.</p>
+
+<p>Frock. Hat. Coat. Shoes. Shift.
+Cap.</p>
+
+<p>Bread. Milk. Tea. Meat. Drink.
+Cake.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON II.</p>
+
+<p>Come. Walk. Run. Go. Jump.
+Dance. Ride. Sit. Stand. Play.<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-177_S" id="BPg_2-177_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-177.png">177</a>]</span>
+Hold. Shake. Speak. Sing. Cry.
+Laugh. Call. Fall.</p>
+
+<p>Day. Night. Sun. Moon. Light.
+Dark. Sleep. Wake.</p>
+
+<p>Wa&#383;h. Dre&#383;s. Ki&#383;s. Comb.</p>
+
+<p>Fire. Hot. Burn. Wind. Rain.
+Cold.</p>
+
+<p>Hurt. Tear. Break. Spill.</p>
+
+<p>Book. See. Look.</p>
+
+<p>Sweet. Good. Clean.</p>
+
+<p>Gone. Lo&#383;t. Hide. Keep. Give.
+Take.</p>
+
+<p>One. Two. Three. Four. Five.
+Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.</p>
+
+<p>White. Black. Red. Blue. Green.
+Brown.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-178_S" id="BPg_2-178_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-178.png">178</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">LESSON III.</p>
+
+<p>STROKE the cat. Play with the
+Dog. Eat the bread. Drink the milk.
+Hold the cup. Lay down the knife.</p>
+
+<p>Look at the fly. See the hor&#383;e.
+Shut the door. Bring the chair. Ring
+the bell. Get your book.</p>
+
+<p>Hide your face. Wipe your no&#383;e.
+Wa&#383;h your hands. Dirty hands. Why
+do you cry? A clean mouth. Shake
+hands. I love you. Ki&#383;s me now.
+Good girl.</p>
+
+<p>The bird &#383;ings. The fire burns.
+The cat jumps. The dog runs. The
+bird flies. The cow lies down. The man
+laughs. The child cries.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-179_S" id="BPg_2-179_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-179.png">179</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">LESSON IV.</p>
+
+<p>LET me comb your head. A&#383;k Betty
+to wa&#383;h your face. Go and &#383;ee for
+&#383;ome bread. Drink milk, if you are
+dry. Play on the floor with the ball.
+Do not touch the ink; you will black
+your hands.</p>
+
+<p>What do you want to &#383;ay to me?
+Speak &#383;low, not &#383;o fa&#383;t. Did you fall?
+You will not cry, not you; the baby
+cries. Will you walk in the fields?</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON V.</p>
+
+<p>COME to me, my little girl. Are
+you tired of playing? Yes. Sit down
+and re&#383;t your&#383;elf, while I talk to you.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-180_S" id="BPg_2-180_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-180.png">180</a>]</span>
+Have you &#383;een the baby? Poor little
+thing. O here it comes. Look
+at him. How helple&#383;s he is. Four
+years ago you were as feeble as this
+very little boy.</p>
+
+<p>See, he cannot hold up his head.
+He is forced to lie on his back, if his
+mamma do not turn him to the right or
+left &#383;ide, he will &#383;oon begin to cry.
+He cries to tell her, that he is tired
+with lying on his back.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON VI.</p>
+
+<p>PERHAPS he is hungry. What
+&#383;hall we give him to eat? Poor fellow,
+he cannot eat. Look in his mouth, he
+has no teeth.</p>
+
+<p>How did you do when you were a baby
+like him? You cannot tell. Do you
+want to know? Look then at the dog,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-181_S" id="BPg_2-181_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-181.png">181</a>]</span>
+with her pretty puppy. You could
+not help your&#383;elf as well as the puppy.
+You could only open your mouth,
+when you were lying, like William, on
+my knee. So I put you to my brea&#383;t,
+and you &#383;ucked, as the puppy &#383;ucks
+now, for there was milk enough for
+you.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON VII.</p>
+
+<p>WHEN you were hungry, you began
+to cry, becau&#383;e you could not &#383;peak.
+You were &#383;even months without teeth,
+always &#383;ucking. But after you got
+one, you began to gnaw a cru&#383;t of
+bread. It was not long before another
+came pop. At ten months you had
+four pretty white teeth, and you u&#383;ed
+to bite me. Poor mamma! Still I did
+not cry, becau&#383;e I am not a child, but<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-182_S" id="BPg_2-182_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-182.png">182</a>]</span>
+you hurt me very much. So I &#383;aid to
+papa, it is time the little girl &#383;hould
+eat. She is not naughty, yet &#383;he hurts
+me. I have given her a cru&#383;t of bread,
+and I mu&#383;t look for &#383;ome other milk.</p>
+
+<p>The cow has got plenty, and her
+jumping calf eats gra&#383;s very well. He
+has got more teeth than my little girl.
+Yes, &#383;ays papa, and he tapped you on
+the cheek, you are old enough to learn
+to eat? Come to me, and I will teach
+you, my little dear, for you mu&#383;t not
+hurt poor mamma, who has given you
+her milk, when you could not take any
+thing el&#383;e.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON VIII.</p>
+
+<p>YOU were then on the carpet, for
+you could not walk well. So when
+you were in a hurry, you u&#383;ed to run<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-183_S" id="BPg_2-183_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-183.png">183</a>]</span>
+quick, quick, quick, on your hands
+and feet, like the dog.</p>
+
+<p>Away you ran to papa, and putting
+both your arms round his leg, for your
+hands were not big enough, you looked
+up at him, and laughed. What did
+this laugh &#383;ay, when you could not
+&#383;peak? Cannot you gue&#383;s by what you
+now &#383;ay to papa?&mdash;Ah! it was, Play
+with me, papa!&mdash;play with me!</p>
+
+<p>Papa began to &#383;mile, and you knew
+that the &#383;mile was always&mdash;Yes. So
+you got a ball, and papa threw it along
+the floor&mdash;Roll&mdash;roll&mdash;roll; and you
+ran after it again&mdash;and again. How
+plea&#383;ed you were. Look at William,
+he &#383;miles; but you could laugh loud&mdash;Ha!
+ha! ha!&mdash;Papa laughed louder
+than the little girl, and rolled the ball
+&#383;till fa&#383;ter.</p>
+
+<p>Then he put the ball on a chair, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-184_S" id="BPg_2-184_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-184.png">184</a>]</span>
+you were forced to take hold of the
+back, and &#383;tand up to reach it. At
+la&#383;t you reached too far, and down you
+fell: not indeed on your face, becau&#383;e
+you put out your hands. You were not
+much hurt; but the palms of your
+hands &#383;marted with the pain, and you
+began to cry, like a little child.</p>
+
+<p>It is only very little children who cry
+when they are hurt; and it is to tell
+their mamma, that &#383;omething is the
+matter with them. Now you can come
+to me, and &#383;ay, Mamma, I have hurt
+my&#383;elf. Pray rub my hand: it &#383;marts.
+Put &#383;omething on it, to make it well.
+A piece of rag, to &#383;top the blood.
+You are not afraid of a little blood&mdash;not
+you. You &#383;cratched your arm with
+a pin: it bled a little; but it did you
+no harm. See, the &#383;kin is grown over
+it again.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-185_S" id="BPg_2-185_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-185.png">185</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">LESSON IX.</p>
+
+<p>TAKE care not to put pins in your
+mouth, becau&#383;e they will &#383;tick in your
+throat, and give you pain. Oh! you
+cannot think what pain a pin would
+give you in your throat, &#383;hould it remain
+there: but, if you by chance
+&#383;wallow it, I &#383;hould be obliged to give
+you, every morning, &#383;omething bitter
+to drink. You never ta&#383;ted any thing
+&#383;o bitter! and you would grow very
+&#383;ick. I never put pins in my mouth;
+but I am older than you, and know how
+to take care of my&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>My mamma took care of me, when I
+was a little girl, like you. She bade
+me never put any thing in my mouth,
+without a&#383;king her what it was.</p>
+
+<p>When you were a baby, with no more<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-186_S" id="BPg_2-186_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-186.png">186</a>]</span>
+&#383;en&#383;e than William, you put every thing
+in your mouth to gnaw, to help your
+teeth to cut through the &#383;kin. Look
+at the puppy, how he bites that piece
+of wood. William pre&#383;&#383;es his gums
+again&#383;t my finger. Poor boy! he is &#383;o
+young, he does not know what he is
+doing. When you bite any thing, it is
+becau&#383;e you are hungry.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON X.</p>
+
+<p>SEE how much taller you are than
+William. In four years you have learned
+to eat, to walk, to talk. Why do you
+&#383;mile? You can do much more, you
+think: you can wa&#383;h your hands and
+face. Very well. I &#383;hould never ki&#383;s
+a dirty face. And you can comb your
+head with the pretty comb you always<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-187_S" id="BPg_2-187_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-187.png">187</a>]</span>
+put by in your own drawer. To be
+&#383;ure, you do all this to be ready to take
+a walk with me. You would be obliged
+to &#383;tay at home, if you could not comb
+your own hair. Betty is bu&#383;y getting
+the dinner ready, and only bru&#383;hes
+William's hair, becau&#383;e he cannot do it
+for him&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>Betty is making an apple-pye. You
+love an apple-pye; but I do not bid
+you make one. Your hands are not
+&#383;trong enough to mix the butter and
+flour together; and you mu&#383;t not try to
+pare the apples, becau&#383;e you cannot
+manage a great knife.</p>
+
+<p>Never touch the large knives: they
+are very &#383;harp, and you might cut your
+finger to the bone. You are a little
+girl, and ought to have a little knife.
+When you are as tall as I am, you &#383;hall
+have a knife as large as mine; and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-188_S" id="BPg_2-188_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-188.png">188</a>]</span>
+when you are as &#383;trong as I am, and
+have learned to manage it, you will not
+hurt your&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>You can trundle a hoop, you &#383;ay;
+and jump over a &#383;tick. O, I forgot!&mdash;and
+march like the men in the red
+coats, when papa plays a pretty tune on
+the fiddle.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON XI.</p>
+
+<p>WHAT, you think that you &#383;hall
+&#383;oon be able to dre&#383;s your&#383;elf entirely?
+I am glad of it: I have &#383;omething el&#383;e
+to do. You may go, and look for your
+frock in the drawer; but I will tie it,
+till you are &#383;tronger. Betty will tie it,
+when I am bu&#383;y.</p>
+
+<p>I button my gown my&#383;elf: I do not
+want a maid to a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t me, when I am<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-189_S" id="BPg_2-189_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-189.png">189</a>]</span>
+dre&#383;&#383;ing. But you have not yet got
+&#383;en&#383;e enough to do it properly, and
+mu&#383;t beg &#383;omebody to help you, till you
+are older.</p>
+
+<p>Children grow older and wi&#383;er at the
+&#383;ame time. William is not able to take
+a piece of meat, becau&#383;e he has not got
+the &#383;en&#383;e which would make him think
+that, without teeth, meat would do him
+harm. He cannot tell what is good for
+him.</p>
+
+<p>The &#383;en&#383;e of children grows with
+them. You know much more than
+William, now you walk alone, and talk;
+but you do not know as much as the
+boys and girls you &#383;ee playing yonder,
+who are half as tall again as you; and
+they do not know half as much as their
+fathers and mothers, who are men and
+women grown. Papa and I were children,
+like you; and men and women<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-190_S" id="BPg_2-190_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-190.png">190</a>]</span>
+took care of us. I carry William, becau&#383;e
+he is too weak to walk. I lift
+you over a &#383;tile, and over the gutter,
+when you cannot jump over it.</p>
+
+<p>You know already, that potatoes
+will not do you any harm: but I mu&#383;t
+pluck the fruit for you, till you are wi&#383;e
+enough to know the ripe apples and
+pears. The hard ones would make you
+&#383;ick, and then you mu&#383;t take phy&#383;ic.
+You do not love phy&#383;ic: I do not love
+it any more than you. But I have more
+&#383;en&#383;e than you; therefore I take care
+not to eat unripe fruit, or any thing el&#383;e
+that would make my &#383;tomach ache, or
+bring out ugly red &#383;pots on my face.</p>
+
+<p>When I was a child, my mamma
+cho&#383;e the fruit for me, to prevent my
+making my&#383;elf &#383;ick. I was ju&#383;t like
+you; I u&#383;ed to a&#383;k for what I &#383;aw, without
+knowing whether it was good or<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-191_S" id="BPg_2-191_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-191.png">191</a>]</span>
+bad. Now I have lived a long time, I
+know what is good; I do not want any
+body to tell me.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON XII.</p>
+
+<p>LOOK at tho&#383;e two dogs. The old
+one brings the ball to me in a moment;
+the young one does not know how.
+He mu&#383;t be taught.</p>
+
+<p>I can cut your &#383;hift in a proper &#383;hape.
+You would not know how to begin.
+You would &#383;poil it; but you will learn.</p>
+
+<p>John digs in the garden, and knows
+when to put the &#383;eed in the ground.
+You cannot tell whether it &#383;hould be in
+the winter or &#383;ummer. Try to find it
+out. When do the trees put out their
+leaves? In the &#383;pring, you &#383;ay, after the<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-192_S" id="BPg_2-192_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-192.png">192</a>]</span>
+cold weather. Fruit would not grow
+ripe without very warm weather. Now
+I am &#383;ure you can gue&#383;s why the &#383;ummer
+is the &#383;ea&#383;on for fruit.</p>
+
+<p>Papa knows that peas and beans are
+good for us to eat with our meat. You
+are glad when you &#383;ee them; but if he
+did not think for you, and have the
+&#383;eed put in the ground, we &#383;hould have
+no peas or beans.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON XIII.</p>
+
+<p>POOR child, &#383;he cannot do much for
+her&#383;elf. When I let her do any thing
+for me, it is to plea&#383;e her: for I could
+do it better my&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>Oh! the poor puppy has tumbled
+off the &#383;tool. Run and &#383;troak him. Put<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-193_S" id="BPg_2-193_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-193.png">193</a>]</span>
+a little milk in a &#383;aucer to comfort him.
+You have more &#383;en&#383;e than he. You
+can pour the milk into the &#383;aucer without
+&#383;pilling it. He would cry for a day
+with hunger, without being able to get
+it. You are wi&#383;er than the dog, you
+mu&#383;t help him. The dog will love you
+for it, and run after you. I feed you
+and take care of you: you love me
+and follow me for it.</p>
+
+<p>When the book fell down on your
+foot, it gave you great pain. The poor
+dog felt the &#383;ame pain ju&#383;t now.</p>
+
+<p>Take care not to hurt him when you
+play with him. And every morning
+leave a little milk in your ba&#383;on for
+him. Do not forget to put the ba&#383;on
+in a corner, le&#383;t &#383;omebody &#383;hould fall
+over it.</p>
+
+<p>When the &#383;now covers the ground,
+&#383;ave the crumbs of bread for the birds.
+In the &#383;ummer they find feed enough,<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-194_S" id="BPg_2-194_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-194.png">194</a>]</span>
+and do not want you to think about
+them.</p>
+
+<p>I make broth for the poor man who
+is &#383;ick. A &#383;ick man is like a child, he
+cannot help him&#383;elf.</p>
+
+
+<p class="center">LESSON X.</p>
+
+<p>WHEN I caught cold &#383;ome time
+ago, I had &#383;uch a pain in my head, I
+could &#383;carcely hold it up. Papa
+opened the door very &#383;oftly, becau&#383;e
+he loves me. You love me, yet you
+made a noi&#383;e. You had not the &#383;en&#383;e
+to know that it made my head wor&#383;e,
+till papa told you.</p>
+
+<p>Papa had a pain in the &#383;tomach, and
+he would not eat the fine cherries or
+grapes on the table. When I brought
+him a cup of camomile tea, he drank
+it without &#383;aying a word, or making<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-195_S" id="BPg_2-195_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-195.png">195</a>]</span>
+an ugly face. He knows that I love
+him, and that I would not give him
+any thing to drink that has a bad ta&#383;te,
+if it were not to do him good.</p>
+
+<p>You a&#383;ked me for &#383;ome apples when
+your &#383;tomach ached; but I was not angry
+with you. If you had been as wi&#383;e
+as papa, you would have &#383;aid, I will
+not eat the apples to-day, I mu&#383;t take
+&#383;ome camomile tea.</p>
+
+<p>You &#383;ay that you do not know how
+to think. Yes; you do a little. The
+other day papa was tired; he had been
+walking about all the morning. After
+dinner he fell a&#383;leep on the &#383;opha. I
+did not bid you be quiet; but you
+thought of what papa &#383;aid to you,
+when my head ached. This made you
+think that you ought not to make a
+noi&#383;e, when papa was re&#383;ting him&#383;elf.
+So you came to me, and &#383;aid to me,
+very &#383;oftly, Pray reach me my ball, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="BPg_2-196_S" id="BPg_2-196_S"></a>[<a href="images/v2-196.png">196</a>]</span>
+I will go and play in the garden, till
+papa wakes.</p>
+
+<p>You were going out; but thinking
+again, you came back to me on your
+tip-toes. Whi&#383;per&mdash;&mdash;whi&#383;per. Pray
+mama, call me, when papa wakes;
+for I &#383;hall be afraid to open the door
+to &#383;ee, le&#383;t I &#383;hould di&#383;turb him.</p>
+
+<p>Away you went.&mdash;Creep&mdash;creep&mdash;and
+&#383;hut the door as &#383;oftly as I could
+have done my&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>That was thinking. When a child
+does wrong at fir&#383;t, &#383;he does not know
+any better. But, after &#383;he has been told
+that &#383;he mu&#383;t not di&#383;turb mama, when
+poor mama is unwell, &#383;he thinks her&#383;elf,
+that &#383;he mu&#383;t not wake papa when
+he is tired.</p>
+
+<p>Another day we will &#383;ee if you can
+think about any thing el&#383;e.</p>
+
+<h4>THE END.</h4>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="BFootnote_175-A_11_S" id="BFootnote_175-A_11_S"></a><a href="#BFNanchor_175-A_11_S"><span class="label">[175-A]</span></a> This title which is indor&#383;ed on the back of
+the manu&#383;cript, I conclude to have been written
+in a period of de&#383;peration, in the month of
+October, 1795.</p>
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-i" id="CPg_3-i"></a>[<a href="images/v3-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-ii" id="CPg_3-ii"></a>[<a href="images/v3-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="V3" id="V3"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. III.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-iii" id="CPg_3-iii"></a>[<a href="images/v3-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-iv" id="CPg_3-iv"></a>[<a href="images/v3-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>LETTERS</h1>
+<h3>AND</h3>
+<h1>MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.</h1>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. I.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-v" id="CPg_3-v"></a>[<a href="images/v3-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-vi" id="CPg_3-vi"></a>[<a href="images/v3-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2><a name="CV3_PREFACE" id="CV3_PREFACE"></a>PREFACE.</h2>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> following Letters may possibly
+be found to contain the finest examples
+of the language of sentiment and
+passion ever presented to the world.
+They bear a striking resemblance to
+the celebrated romance of Werter,
+though the incidents to which they relate
+are of a very different cast. Probably
+the readers to whom Werter
+is incapable of affording pleasure, will
+receive no delight from the present
+publication. The editor apprehends<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-vii" id="CPg_3-vii"></a>[<a href="images/v3-vii.png">vii</a>]</span>
+that, in the judgment of those best
+qualified to decide upon the comparison,
+these Letters will be admitted to
+have the superiority over the fiction of
+Goethe. They are the offspring of a
+glowing imagination, and a heart penetrated
+with the passion it essays to describe.</p>
+
+<p>To the series of letters constituting
+the principal article in these two volumes,
+are added various pieces, none
+of which, it is hoped, will be found
+discreditable to the talents of the author.
+The slight fragment of Letters on
+the Management of Infants, may be
+thought a trifle; but it seems to have
+some value, as presenting to us with
+vividness the intention of the writer on<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-viii" id="CPg_3-viii"></a>[<a href="images/v3-viii.png">viii</a>]</span>
+this important subject. The publication
+of a few select Letters to Mr.
+Johnson, appeared to be at once a just
+monument to the sincerity of his friendship,
+and a valuable and interesting
+specimen of the mind of the writer.
+The Letter on the Present Character
+of the French Nation, the Extract of
+the Cave of Fancy, a Tale, and the
+Hints for the Second Part of the Rights
+of Woman, may, I believe, safely be
+left to speak for themselves. The Essay
+on Poetry and our Relish for the Beauties
+of Nature, appeared in the Monthly
+Magazine for April last, and is the
+only piece in this collection which has
+previously found its way to the press.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-ix" id="CPg_3-ix"></a>[<a href="images/v3-ix.png">ix</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-1" id="CPg_3-1"></a>[<a href="images/v3-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2><a name="CV3_LETTERS" id="CV3_LETTERS"></a>LETTERS.</h2>
+
+
+<h4>LETTER I</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Two o'Clock.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> dear love, after making my
+arrangements for our snug dinner to-day,
+I have been taken by storm,
+and obliged to promise to dine, at
+an early hour, with the Miss &mdash;&mdash;s,
+the <i>only</i> day they intend to pass here.
+I shall however leave the key in the
+door, and hope to find you at my
+fire-side when I return, about eight
+o'clock. Will you not wait for poor
+Joan?&mdash;whom you will find better, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-2" id="CPg_3-2"></a>[<a href="images/v3-2.png">2</a>]</span>
+till then think very affectionately of
+her.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours, truly, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I am sitting down to dinner; so do
+not send an answer.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER II</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Past Twelve o'Clock, Monday night.</p>
+
+<p class="right">[August.]&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I obey</span> an emotion of my heart,
+which made me think of wishing thee,
+my love, good-night! before I go to
+rest, with more tenderness than I can
+to-morrow, when writing a hasty line
+or two under Colonel &mdash;&mdash;'s eye. You
+can scarcely imagine with what pleasure
+I anticipate the day, when we are<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-3" id="CPg_3-3"></a>[<a href="images/v3-3.png">3</a>]</span>
+to begin almost to live together; and
+you would smile to hear how many
+plans of employment I have in my head,
+now that I am confident my heart has
+found peace in your bosom.&mdash;Cherish
+me with that dignified tenderness,
+which I have only found in you; and
+your own dear girl will try to keep under
+a quickness of feeling, that has
+sometimes given you pain&mdash;Yes, I will
+be <i>good</i>, that I may deserve to be happy;
+and whilst you love me, I cannot
+again fall into the miserable state, which
+rendered life a burthen almost too heavy
+to be borne.</p>
+
+<p>But, good-night!&mdash;God bless you!
+Sterne says, that is equal to a kiss&mdash;yet
+I would rather give you the kiss into
+the bargain, glowing with gratitude to
+Heaven, and affection to you. I like
+the word affection, because it signifies<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-4" id="CPg_3-4"></a>[<a href="images/v3-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+something habitual; and we are soon to
+meet, to try whether we have mind
+enough to keep our hearts warm.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I will be at the barrier a little after
+ten o'clock to-morrow<a name="FNanchor_4-A_12" id="CFNanchor_4-A_12"></a><a href="#CFootnote_4-A_12" class="fnanchor">[4-A]</a>.&mdash;Yours&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER III</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> have often called me, dear girl,
+but you would now say good, did you
+know how very attentive I have been
+to the &mdash;&mdash; ever since I came to Paris.
+I am not however going to trouble<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-5" id="CPg_3-5"></a>[<a href="images/v3-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+you with the account, because I like to
+see your eyes praise me; and, Milton
+insinuates, that, during such recitals,
+there are interruptions, not ungrateful
+to the heart, when the honey that drops
+from the lips is not merely words.</p>
+
+<p>Yet, I shall not (let me tell you before
+these people enter, to force me to
+huddle away my letter) be content with
+only a kiss of <span class="smcap">duty</span>&mdash;you <i>must</i> be glad to
+see me&mdash;because you are glad&mdash;or I will
+make love to the <i>shade</i> of Mirabeau, to
+whom my heart continually turned,
+whilst I was talking with Madame
+&mdash;&mdash;, forcibly telling me, that it will
+ever have sufficient warmth to love,
+whether I will or not, sentiment, though
+I so highly respect principle.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Not that I think Mirabeau utterly
+devoid of principles&mdash;Far from it&mdash;and,
+if I had not begun to form a new the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-6" id="CPg_3-6"></a>[<a href="images/v3-6.png">6</a>]</span>ory
+respecting men, I should, in the vanity
+of my heart, have <i>imagined</i> that <i>I</i>
+could have made something of his&mdash;&mdash;it
+was composed of such materials&mdash;Hush!
+here they come&mdash;and love flies
+away in the twinkling of an eye, leaving
+a little brush of his wing on my
+pale cheeks.</p>
+
+<p>I hope to see Dr. &mdash;&mdash; this morning;
+I am going to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s to meet him.
+&mdash;&mdash;, and some others, are invited to
+dine with us to-day; and to-morrow I
+am to spend the day with &mdash;&mdash;.</p>
+
+<p>I shall probably not be able to return
+to &mdash;&mdash; to-morrow; but it is no matter,
+because I must take a carriage, I
+have so many books, that I immediately
+want, to take with me.&mdash;On Friday
+then I shall expect you to dine
+with me&mdash;and, if you come a little before
+dinner, it is so long since I have<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-7" id="CPg_3-7"></a>[<a href="images/v3-7.png">7</a>]</span>
+seen you, you will not be scolded by
+yours affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER IV<a name="FNanchor_7-A_13" id="CFNanchor_7-A_13"></a><a href="#CFootnote_7-A_13" class="fnanchor">[7-A]</a>.</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Morning [September.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">A man</span>, whom a letter from Mr. &mdash;&mdash;
+previously announced, called here yesterday
+for the payment of a draft; and,
+as he seemed disappointed at not finding
+you at home, I sent him to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;.
+I have since seen him, and he tells me
+that he has settled the business.</p>
+
+<p>So much for business!&mdash;May I venture
+to talk a little longer about less
+weighty affairs?&mdash;How are you?&mdash;I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-8" id="CPg_3-8"></a>[<a href="images/v3-8.png">8</a>]</span>
+have been following you all along the
+road this comfortless weather; for,
+when I am absent from those I love, my
+imagination is as lively, as if my senses
+had never been gratified by their presence&mdash;I
+was going to say caresses&mdash;and
+why should I not? I have found out
+that I have more mind than you, in one
+respect; because I can, without any
+violent effort of reason, find food for
+love in the same object, much longer
+than you can.&mdash;The way to my senses
+is through my heart; but, forgive me!
+I think there is sometimes a shorter cut
+to yours.</p>
+
+<p>With ninety-nine men out of a hundred,
+a very sufficient dash of folly is
+necessary to render a woman <i>piquante</i>, a
+soft word for desirable; and, beyond
+these casual ebullitions of sympathy,
+few look for enjoyment by fostering a<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-9" id="CPg_3-9"></a>[<a href="images/v3-9.png">9</a>]</span>
+passion in their hearts. One reason, in
+short, why I wish my whole sex to become
+wiser, is, that the foolish ones
+may not, by their pretty folly, rob those
+whose sensibility keeps down their vanity,
+of the few roses that afford them
+some solace in the thorny road of life.</p>
+
+<p>I do not know how I fell into these
+reflections, excepting one thought produced
+it&mdash;that these continual separations
+were necessary to warm your affection.&mdash;Of
+late, we are always separating.&mdash;Crack!&mdash;crack!&mdash;and away
+you go.&mdash;This joke wears the sallow
+cast of thought; for, though I began to
+write cheerfully, some melancholy tears
+have found their way into my eyes, that
+linger there, whilst a glow of tenderness
+at my heart whispers that you are one
+of the best creatures in the world.&mdash;Pardon
+then the vagaries of a mind,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-10" id="CPg_3-10"></a>[<a href="images/v3-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+that has been almost "crazed by care,"
+as well as "crossed in hapless love,"
+and bear with me a <i>little</i> longer!&mdash;When
+we are settled in the country together,
+more duties will open before me, and
+my heart, which now, trembling into
+peace, is agitated by every emotion that
+awakens the remembrance of old griefs,
+will learn to rest on yours, with that
+dignity your character, not to talk of
+my own, demands.</p>
+
+<p>Take care of yourself&mdash;and write
+soon to your own girl (you may add
+dear, if you please) who sincerely loves
+you, and will try to convince you of it,
+by becoming happier.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-11" id="CPg_3-11"></a>[<a href="images/v3-11.png">11</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER V</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just received your letter, and
+feel as if I could not go to bed tranquilly
+without saying a few words in reply&mdash;merely
+to tell you, that my mind is serene,
+and my heart affectionate.</p>
+
+<p>Ever since you last saw me inclined
+to faint, I have felt some gentle twitches,
+which make me begin to think, that I
+am nourishing a creature who will soon
+be sensible of my care.&mdash;This thought
+has not only produced an overflowing of
+tenderness to you, but made me very
+attentive to calm my mind and take
+exercise, lest I should destroy an object,
+in whom we are to have a mutual interest,
+you know. Yesterday&mdash;do not
+smile!&mdash;finding that I had hurt myself<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-12" id="CPg_3-12"></a>[<a href="images/v3-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+by lifting precipitately a large log of
+wood, I sat down in an agony, till I felt
+those said twitches again.</p>
+
+<p>Are you very busy?</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>So you may reckon on its being finished
+soon, though not before you come
+home, unless you are detained longer
+than I now allow myself to believe you
+will.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Be that as it may, write to me, my
+best love, and bid me be patient&mdash;kindly&mdash;and
+the expressions of kindness
+will again beguile the time, as sweetly
+as they have done to-night.&mdash;Tell me
+also over and over again, that your
+happiness (and you deserve to be<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-13" id="CPg_3-13"></a>[<a href="images/v3-13.png">13</a>]</span>
+happy!) is closely connected with
+mine, and I will try to dissipate, as they
+rise, the fumes of former discontent,
+that have too often clouded the sunshine,
+which you have endeavoured to diffuse
+through my mind. God bless you!
+Take care of yourself, and remember
+with tenderness your affectionate</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I am going to rest very happy, and
+you have made me so.&mdash;This is the
+kindest good-night I can utter.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-14" id="CPg_3-14"></a>[<a href="images/v3-14.png">14</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> glad to find that other people
+can be unreasonable, as well as myself&mdash;for
+be it known to thee, that I answered
+thy <i>first</i> letter, the very night it
+reached me (Sunday), though thou
+couldst not receive it before Wednesday,
+because it was not sent off till the
+next day.&mdash;There is a full, true, and
+particular account.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Yet I am not angry with thee, my
+love, for I think that it is a proof of
+stupidity, and likewise of a milk-and-water
+affection, which comes to the
+same thing, when the temper is governed
+by a square and compass.&mdash;There is
+nothing picturesque in this straight-<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-15" id="CPg_3-15"></a>[<a href="images/v3-15.png">15</a>]</span>lined
+equality, and the passions always
+give grace to the actions.</p>
+
+<p>Recollection now makes my heart
+bound to thee; but, it is not to thy
+money-getting face, though I cannot
+be seriously displeased with the exertion
+which increases my esteem, or
+rather is what I should have expected
+from thy character.&mdash;No; I have thy
+honest countenance before me&mdash;Pop&mdash;relaxed
+by tenderness; a little&mdash;little
+wounded by my whims; and thy eyes
+glistening with sympathy.&mdash;Thy lips
+then feel softer than soft&mdash;and I rest my
+cheek on thine, forgetting all the
+world.&mdash;I have not left the hue of love
+out of the picture&mdash;the rosy glow; and
+fancy has spread it over my own cheeks,
+I believe, for I feel them burning,
+whilst a delicious tear trembles in my
+eye, that would be all your own, if a<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-16" id="CPg_3-16"></a>[<a href="images/v3-16.png">16</a>]</span>
+grateful emotion directed to the Father
+of nature, who has made me thus
+alive to happiness, did not give more
+warmth to the sentiment it divides&mdash;I
+must pause a moment.</p>
+
+<p>Need I tell you that I am tranquil
+after writing thus?&mdash;I do not know
+why, but I have more confidence in
+your affection, when absent, than present;
+nay, I think that you must love
+me, for, in the sincerity of my heart
+let me say it, I believe I deserve your
+tenderness, because I am true, and
+have a degree of sensibility that you
+can see and relish.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-17" id="CPg_3-17"></a>[<a href="images/v3-17.png">17</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning [December 29.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> seem to have taken up your
+abode at H&mdash;&mdash;. Pray sir! when do
+you think of coming home? or, to
+write very considerately, when will
+business permit you? I shall expect
+(as the country people say in England)
+that you will make a <i>power</i> of money to
+indemnify me for your absence.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-18" id="CPg_3-18"></a>[<a href="images/v3-18.png">18</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Well! but, my love, to the old story&mdash;am
+I to see you this week, or this
+month?&mdash;I do not know what you are
+about&mdash;for, as you did not tell me, I
+would not ask Mr. &mdash;&mdash;, who is generally
+pretty communicative.</p>
+
+<p>I long to see Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;; not to
+hear from you, so do not give yourself
+airs, but to get a letter from Mr. &mdash;&mdash;.
+And I am half angry with you for not
+informing me whether she had brought
+one with her or not.&mdash;On this score I
+will cork up some of the kind things
+that were ready to drop from my pen,
+which has never been dipt in gall when
+addressing you; or, will only suffer an
+exclamation&mdash;"The creature!" or a
+kind look, to escape me, when I pass
+the slippers&mdash;which I could not remove
+from my <i>salle</i> door, though they are
+not the handsomest of their kind.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-19" id="CPg_3-19"></a>[<a href="images/v3-19.png">19</a>]</span>
+Be not too anxious to get money!&mdash;for
+nothing worth having is to be purchased.
+God bless you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER VIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Night [December 30.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> best love, your letter to-night
+was particularly grateful to my heart,
+depressed by the letters I received by
+&mdash;&mdash;, for he brought me several, and
+the parcel of books directed to Mr.
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; was for me. Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+letter was long and very affectionate;
+but the account he gives me of his own<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-20" id="CPg_3-20"></a>[<a href="images/v3-20.png">20</a>]</span>
+affairs, though he obviously makes the
+best of them, has vexed me.</p>
+
+<p>A melancholy letter from my sister
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has also harrassed my mind&mdash;that
+from my brother would have given
+me sincere pleasure; but for&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>There is a spirit of independence in
+his letter, that will please you; and you
+shall see it, when we are once more over
+the fire together.&mdash;I think that you
+would hail him as a brother, with one<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-21" id="CPg_3-21"></a>[<a href="images/v3-21.png">21</a>]</span>
+of your tender looks, when your heart
+not only gives a lustre to your eye, but
+a dance of playfulness, that he would
+meet with a glow half made up of bashfulness,
+and a desire to please the&mdash;&mdash;where
+shall I find a word to express
+the relationship which subsists between
+us?&mdash;Shall I ask the little twitcher?&mdash;But
+I have dropt half the sentence
+that was to tell you how much he
+would be inclined to love the man loved
+by his sister. I have been fancying myself
+sitting between you, ever since I
+began to write, and my heart has leaped
+at the thought!&mdash;You see how I chat
+to you.</p>
+
+<p>I did not receive your letter till I
+came home; and I did not expect it,
+for the post came in much later than
+usual. It was a cordial to me&mdash;and I
+wanted one.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-22" id="CPg_3-22"></a>[<a href="images/v3-22.png">22</a>]</span>
+Mr. &mdash;&mdash; tells me that he has written
+again and again.&mdash;Love him a little!&mdash;It
+would be a kind of separation, if you
+did not love those I love.</p>
+
+<p>There was so much considerate tenderness
+in your epistle to-night, that, if
+it has not made you dearer to me, it has
+made me forcibly feel how very dear
+you are to me, by charming away half
+my cares.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER IX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tuesday Morning [December 31.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Though</span> I have just sent a letter off,
+yet, as captain &mdash;&mdash; offers to take one,
+I am not willing to let him go without
+a kind greeting, because trifles of this<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-23" id="CPg_3-23"></a>[<a href="images/v3-23.png">23</a>]</span>
+sort, without having any effect on my
+mind, damp my spirits:&mdash;and you, with
+all your struggles to be manly, have
+some of this same sensibility.&mdash;Do not
+bid it begone, for I love to see it
+striving to master your features; besides,
+these kind of sympathies are the life of
+affection: and why, in cultivating our
+understandings, should we try to dry up
+these springs of pleasure, which gush
+out to give a freshness to days browned
+by care!</p>
+
+<p>The books sent to me are such as
+we may read together; so I shall not
+look into them till you return; when
+you shall read, whilst I mend my stockings.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-24" id="CPg_3-24"></a>[<a href="images/v3-24.png">24</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER X</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday Night [January 1.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> I have been, you tell me, three
+days without writing, I ought not to
+complain of two: yet, as I expected to
+receive a letter this afternoon, I am
+hurt; and why should I, by concealing
+it, affect the heroism I do not feel?</p>
+
+<p>I hate commerce. How differently
+must &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s head and heart be organized
+from mine! You will tell me,
+that exertions are necessary: I am
+weary of them! The face of things,
+public and private, vexes me. The
+"peace" and clemency which seemed
+to be dawning a few days ago, disappear
+again. "I am fallen," as Milton said,
+"on evil days;" for I really believe<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-25" id="CPg_3-25"></a>[<a href="images/v3-25.png">25</a>]</span>
+that Europe will be in a state of convulsion,
+during half a century at least.
+Life is but a labour of patience: it is
+always rolling a great stone up a hill;
+for, before a person can find a resting-place,
+imagining it is lodged, down it
+comes again, and all the work is to be
+done over anew!</p>
+
+<p>Should I attempt to write any more,
+I could not change the strain. My head
+aches, and my heart is heavy. The
+world appears an "unweeded garden,"
+where "things rank and vile" flourish
+best.</p>
+
+<p>If you do not return soon&mdash;or, which
+is no such mighty matter, talk of it&mdash;I
+will throw your slippers out at
+window, and be off&mdash;nobody knows
+where.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-26" id="CPg_3-26"></a>[<a href="images/v3-26.png">26</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Finding that I was observed, I told
+the good women, the two Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;s,
+simply that I was with child: and let
+them stare! and &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;,
+nay, all the world, may know it for
+aught I care!&mdash;Yet I wish to avoid
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s coarse jokes.</p>
+
+<p>Considering the care and anxiety a
+woman must have about a child before
+it comes into the world, it seems to
+me, by a <i>natural right</i>, to belong to
+her. When men get immersed in the
+world, they seem to lose all sensations,
+excepting those necessary to continue or
+produce life!&mdash;Are these the privileges
+of reason? Amongst the feathered race,
+whilst the hen keeps the young warm,
+her mate stays by to cheer her; but it
+is sufficient for man to condescend to
+get a child, in order to claim it.&mdash;A
+man is a tyrant!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-27" id="CPg_3-27"></a>[<a href="images/v3-27.png">27</a>]</span>
+You may now tell me, that, if it were
+not for me, you would be laughing
+away with some honest fellows in L&mdash;n.
+The casual exercise of social sympathy
+would not be sufficient for me&mdash;I should
+not think such an heartless life worth
+preserving.&mdash;It is necessary to be in
+good-humour with you, to be pleased
+with the world.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p class="right">Thursday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I was</span> very low-spirited last night,
+ready to quarrel with your cheerful
+temper, which makes absence easy to
+you.&mdash;And, why should I mince the
+the matter? I was offended at your not
+even mentioning it.&mdash;I do not want to
+be loved like a goddess; but I wish to
+be necessary to you. God bless you<a name="FNanchor_27-A_14" id="CFNanchor_27-A_14"></a><a href="#CFootnote_27-A_14" class="fnanchor">[27-A]</a>!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-28" id="CPg_3-28"></a>[<a href="images/v3-28.png">28</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h4>LETTER XI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just received your kind and
+rational letter, and would fain hide my
+face, glowing with shame for my folly.&mdash;I
+would hide it in your bosom, if you
+would again open it to me, and nestle
+closely till you bade my fluttering
+heart be still, by saying that you forgave
+me. With eyes overflowing with
+tears, and in the humblest attitude, I
+intreat you.&mdash;Do not turn from me, for
+indeed I love you fondly, and have been
+very wretched, since the night I was so
+cruelly hurt by thinking that you had
+no confidence in me&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>It is time for me to grow more reasonable,
+a few more of these caprices
+of sensibility would destroy me. I have,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-29" id="CPg_3-29"></a>[<a href="images/v3-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+in fact, been very much indisposed for
+a few days past, and the notion that I
+was tormenting, or perhaps killing, a
+poor little animal, about whom I am
+grown anxious and tender, now I feel
+it alive, made me worse. My bowels
+have been dreadfully disordered, and
+every thing I ate or drank disagreed
+with my stomach; still I feel intimations
+of its existence, though they have been
+fainter.</p>
+
+<p>Do you think that the creature goes
+regularly to sleep? I am ready to ask as
+many questions as Voltaire's Man of
+Forty Crowns. Ah! do not continue to
+be angry with me! You perceive that I
+am already smiling through my tears&mdash;You
+have lightened my heart, and my
+frozen spirits are melting into playfulness.</p>
+
+<p>Write the moment you receive this.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-30" id="CPg_3-30"></a>[<a href="images/v3-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+I shall count the minutes. But drop
+not an angry word&mdash;I cannot now bear
+it. Yet, if you think I deserve a scolding
+(it does not admit of a question, I
+grant), wait till you come back&mdash;and
+then, if you are angry one day, I shall
+be sure of seeing you the next.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; did not write to you, I suppose,
+because he talked of going to
+H&mdash;&mdash;. Hearing that I was ill, he called
+very kindly on me, not dreaming that
+it was some words that he incautiously
+let fall, which rendered me so.</p>
+
+<p>God bless you, my love; do not shut
+your heart against a return of tenderness;
+and, as I now in fancy cling to
+you, be more than ever my support.&mdash;Feel
+but as affectionate when you read
+this letter, as I did writing it, and you
+will make happy, your</p>
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-31" id="CPg_3-31"></a>[<a href="images/v3-31.png">31</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h4>LETTER XII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I will</span> never, if I am not entirely
+cured of quarrelling, begin to encourage
+"quick-coming fancies," when
+we are separated. Yesterday, my love,
+I could not open your letter for some
+time; and, though it was not half as
+severe as I merited, it threw me into
+such a fit of trembling, as seriously
+alarmed me. I did not, as you may
+suppose, care for a little pain on my
+own account; but all the fears which
+I have had for a few days past, returned
+with fresh force. This morning I am
+better; will you not be glad to hear it?
+You perceive that sorrow has almost
+made a child of me, and that I want to
+be soothed to peace.</p>
+
+<p>One thing you mistake in my cha<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-32" id="CPg_3-32"></a>[<a href="images/v3-32.png">32</a>]</span>racter,
+and imagine that to be coldness
+which is just the contrary. For, when
+I am hurt by the person most dear to
+me, I must let out a whole torrent of
+emotions, in which tenderness would
+be uppermost, or stifle them altogether;
+and it appears to me almost a duty to
+stifle them, when I imagine <i>that I am
+treated with coldness</i>.</p>
+
+<p>I am afraid that I have vexed you,
+my own &mdash;&mdash;. I know the quickness
+of your feelings&mdash;and let me, in the
+sincerity of my heart, assure you, there
+is nothing I would not suffer to make
+you happy. My own happiness wholly
+depends on you&mdash;and, knowing you,
+when my reason is not clouded, I look
+forward to a rational prospect of as much
+felicity as the earth affords&mdash;with a little
+dash of rapture into the bargain, if
+you will look at me, when we meet<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-33" id="CPg_3-33"></a>[<a href="images/v3-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+again, as you have sometimes greeted,
+your humbled, yet most affectionate</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thursday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been wishing the time away,
+my kind love, unable to rest till I knew
+that my penitential letter had reached
+your hand&mdash;and this afternoon, when
+your tender epistle of Tuesday gave
+such exquisite pleasure to your poor
+sick girl, her heart smote her to think
+that you were still to receive another
+cold one.&mdash;Burn it also, my &mdash;&mdash;; yet
+do not forget that even those letters
+were full of love; and I shall ever recollect,
+that you did not wait to be
+mollified by my penitence, before you
+took me again to your heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-34" id="CPg_3-34"></a>[<a href="images/v3-34.png">34</a>]</span>
+I have been unwell, and would not,
+now I am recovering, take a journey,
+because I have been seriously alarmed
+and angry with myself, dreading continually
+the fatal consequence of my
+folly.&mdash;But, should you think it right
+to remain at H&mdash;, I shall find some opportunity,
+in the course of a fortnight,
+or less perhaps, to come to you, and
+before then I shall be strong again.&mdash;Yet
+do not be uneasy! I am really better,
+and never took such care of myself, as
+I have done since you restored my peace
+of mind. The girl is come to warm
+my bed&mdash;so I will tenderly say, good
+night! and write a line or two in the
+morning.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wish</span> you were here to walk
+with me this fine morning! yet your
+absence shall not prevent me. I have
+stayed at home too much; though,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-35" id="CPg_3-35"></a>[<a href="images/v3-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+when I was so dreadfully out of spirits,
+I was careless of every thing.</p>
+
+<p>I will now sally forth (you will go
+with me in my heart) and try whether
+this fine bracing <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'a r'">air</ins> will not give the
+vigour to the poor babe, it had, before
+I so inconsiderately gave way to the
+grief that deranged my bowels, and
+gave a turn to my whole system.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;* * * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-36" id="CPg_3-36"></a>[<a href="images/v3-36.png">36</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> two or three letters, which I
+have written to you lately, my love, will
+serve as an answer to your explanatory
+one. I cannot but respect your motives
+and conduct. I always respected
+them; and was only hurt, by what
+seemed to me a want of confidence, and
+consequently affection.&mdash;I thought also,
+that if you were obliged to stay three
+months at H&mdash;, I might as well have
+been with you.&mdash;Well! well, what signifies
+what I brooded over&mdash;Let us now
+be friends!</p>
+
+<p>I shall probably receive a letter from
+you to-day, sealing my pardon&mdash;and I
+will be careful not to torment you with<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-37" id="CPg_3-37"></a>[<a href="images/v3-37.png">37</a>]</span>
+my querulous humours, at least, till I
+see you again. Act as circumstances
+direct, and I will not enquire when
+they will permit you to return, convinced
+that you will hasten to your
+* * * *, when you have attained (or
+lost sight of) the object of your journey.</p>
+
+<p>What a picture have you sketched of
+our fire-side! Yes, my love, my fancy
+was instantly at work, and I found my
+head on your shoulder, whilst my eyes
+were fixed on the little creatures that
+were clinging about your knees. I did
+not absolutely determine that there
+should be six&mdash;if you have not set your
+heart on this round number.</p>
+
+<p>I am going to dine with Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;.
+I have not been to visit her since the
+first day she came to Paris. I wish
+indeed to be out in the air as much as
+I can; for the exercise I have taken<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-38" id="CPg_3-38"></a>[<a href="images/v3-38.png">38</a>]</span>
+these two or three days past, has been
+of such service to me, that I hope
+shortly to tell you, that I am quite well.
+I have scarcely slept before last night,
+and then not much.&mdash;The two Mrs.
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;s have been very anxious and
+tender.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I need not desire you to give the
+colonel a good bottle of wine.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wrote</span> to you yesterday, my &mdash;&mdash;;
+but, finding that the colonel is still detained
+(for his passport was forgotten at
+the office yesterday) I am not willing to<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-39" id="CPg_3-39"></a>[<a href="images/v3-39.png">39</a>]</span>
+let so many days elapse without your
+hearing from me, after having talked
+of illness and apprehensions.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot boast of being quite recovered,
+yet I am (I must use my Yorkshire
+phrase; for, when my heart is
+warm, pop come the expressions of
+childhood into my head) so <i>lightsome</i>,
+that I think it will not <i>go badly with
+me</i>.&mdash;And nothing shall be wanting on
+my part, I assure you; for I am urged
+on, not only by an enlivened affection
+for you, but by a new-born tenderness
+that plays cheerly round my dilating
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>I was therefore, in defiance of cold
+and dirt, out in the air the greater part
+of yesterday; and, if I get over this
+evening without a return of the fever
+that has tormented me, I shall talk no
+more of illness. I have promised the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-40" id="CPg_3-40"></a>[<a href="images/v3-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+little creature, that its mother, who
+ought to cherish it, will not again
+plague it, and begged it to pardon me;
+and, since I could not hug either it or
+you to my breast, I have to my heart.&mdash;I
+am afraid to read over this prattle&mdash;but
+it is only for your eye.</p>
+
+<p>I have been seriously vexed, to find
+that, whilst you were harrassed by impediments
+in your undertakings, I was
+giving you additional uneasiness.&mdash;If
+you can make any of your plans answer&mdash;it
+is well, I do not think a <i>little</i> money
+inconvenient; but, should they fail, we
+will struggle cheerfully together&mdash;drawn
+closer by the pinching blasts of
+poverty.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu, my love! Write often to
+your poor girl, and write long letters;
+for I not only like them for being longer,
+but because more heart steals into them;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-41" id="CPg_3-41"></a>[<a href="images/v3-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+and I am happy to catch your heart
+whenever I can.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tuesday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I seize</span> this opportunity to inform
+you, that I am to set out on Thursday
+with Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and hope to tell you
+soon (on your lips) how glad I shall be
+to see you. I have just got my passport,
+so I do not foresee any impediment to
+my reaching H&mdash;&mdash;, to bid you good-night
+next Friday in my new apartment&mdash;where
+I am to meet you and love, in
+spite of care, to smile me to sleep&mdash;for
+I have not caught much rest since
+we parted.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-42" id="CPg_3-42"></a>[<a href="images/v3-42.png">42</a>]</span>
+You have, by your tenderness and
+worth, twisted yourself more artfully
+round my heart, than I supposed possible.&mdash;Let
+me indulge the thought,
+that I have thrown out some tendrils to
+cling to the elm by which I wish to be
+supported.&mdash;This is talking a new language
+for me!&mdash;But, knowing that I
+am not a parasite-plant, I am willing to
+receive the proofs of affection, that
+every pulse replies to, when I think of
+being once more in the same house
+with you.&mdash;God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-43" id="CPg_3-43"></a>[<a href="images/v3-43.png">43</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I only</span> send this as an <i>avant-coureur</i>,
+without jack-boots, to tell you, that I am
+again on the wing, and hope to be with
+you a few hours after you receive it. I
+shall find you well, and composed, I
+am sure; or, more properly speaking,
+cheerful.&mdash;What is the reason that my
+spirits are not as manageable as yours?
+Yet, now I think of it, I will not allow
+that your temper is even, though
+I have promised myself, in order to
+obtain my own forgiveness, that I will
+not ruffle it for a long, long time&mdash;I am
+afraid to say never.</p>
+
+<p>Farewell for a moment!&mdash;Do not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-44" id="CPg_3-44"></a>[<a href="images/v3-44.png">44</a>]</span>
+forget that I am driving towards you
+in person! My mind, unfettered, has
+flown to you long since, or rather has
+never left you.</p>
+
+<p>I am well, and have no apprehension
+that I shall find the journey too fatiguing,
+when I follow the lead of my
+heart.&mdash;With my face turned to H&mdash;
+my spirits will not sink&mdash;and my mind
+has always hitherto enabled my body
+to do whatever I wished.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-45" id="CPg_3-45"></a>[<a href="images/v3-45.png">45</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">H&mdash;, Thursday Morning, March 12.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">We</span> are such creatures of habit, my
+love, that, though I cannot say I was
+sorry, childishly so, for your going,
+when I knew that you were to stay such
+a short time, and I had a plan of employment;
+yet I could not sleep.&mdash;I
+turned to your side of the bed, and
+tried to make the most of the comfort
+of the pillow, which you used to tell
+me I was churlish about; but all would
+not do.&mdash;I took nevertheless my walk
+before breakfast, though the weather
+was not very inviting&mdash;and here I am,
+wishing you a finer day, and seeing you
+peep over my shoulder, as I write, with
+one of your kindest looks&mdash;when your<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-46" id="CPg_3-46"></a>[<a href="images/v3-46.png">46</a>]</span>
+eyes glisten, and a suffusion creeps over
+your relaxing features.</p>
+
+<p>But I do not mean to dally with you
+this morning&mdash;So God bless you! Take
+care of yourself&mdash;and sometimes fold to
+your heart your affectionate</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XIX</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">DO</span> not call me stupid, for leaving
+on the table the little bit of paper I was
+to inclose.&mdash;This comes of being in
+love at the fag-end of a letter of business.&mdash;You
+know, you say, they will
+not chime together.&mdash;I had got you by
+the fire-side, with the <i>gigot</i> smoking on
+the board, to lard your poor bare ribs&mdash;and
+behold, I closed my letter with<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-47" id="CPg_3-47"></a>[<a href="images/v3-47.png">47</a>]</span>out
+taking the paper up, that was directly
+under my eyes!&mdash;What had I got
+in them to render me so blind?&mdash;I give
+you leave to answer the question, if you
+will not scold; for I am</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours most affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday, August 17.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>I have promised &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; to go with
+him to his country-house, where he is
+now permitted to dine&mdash;I, and the little
+darling, to be sure<a name="FNanchor_47-A_15" id="CFNanchor_47-A_15"></a><a href="#CFootnote_47-A_15" class="fnanchor">[47-A]</a>&mdash;whom I cannot<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-48" id="CPg_3-48"></a>[<a href="images/v3-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+help kissing with more fondness, since
+you left us. I think I shall enjoy the
+fine prospect, and that it will rather
+enliven, than satiate my imagination.</p>
+
+<p>I have called on Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. She
+has the manners of a gentlewoman,
+with a dash of the easy French coquetry,
+which renders her <i>piquante</i>.&mdash;But <i>Monsieur</i>
+her husband, whom nature never
+dreamed of casting in either the mould
+of a gentleman or lover, makes but an
+aukward figure in the foreground of
+the picture.</p>
+
+<p>The H&mdash;&mdash;s are very ugly, without
+doubt&mdash;and the house smelt of commerce
+from top to toe&mdash;so that his
+abortive attempt to display taste, only
+proved it to be one of the things not to
+be bought with gold. I was in a room
+a moment alone, and my attention was
+attracted by the <i>pendule</i>&mdash;A nymph was<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-49" id="CPg_3-49"></a>[<a href="images/v3-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+offering up her vows before a smoking
+altar, to a fat-bottomed Cupid (saving
+your presence), who was kicking his
+heels in the air.&mdash;Ah! kick on, thought
+I; for the demon of traffic will ever
+fright away the loves and graces, that
+streak with the rosy beams of infant
+fancy the <i>sombre</i> day of life&mdash;whilst the
+imagination, not allowing us to see
+things as they are, enables us to catch
+a hasty draught of the running stream
+of delight, the thirst for which seems to
+be given only to tantalize us.</p>
+
+<p>But I am philosophizing; nay, perhaps
+you will call me severe, and bid
+me let the square-headed money-getters
+alone.&mdash;Peace to them! though none
+of the social sprites (and there are not a
+few of different descriptions, who sport
+about the various inlets to my heart)
+gave me a twitch to restrain my pen.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-50" id="CPg_3-50"></a>[<a href="images/v3-50.png">50</a>]</span>
+I have been writing on, expecting
+poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; to come; for, when I
+began, I merely thought of business;
+and, as this is the idea that most naturally
+associates with your image, I wonder
+I stumbled on any other.</p>
+
+<p>Yet, as common life, in my opinion,
+is scarcely worth having, even with a
+<i>gigot</i> every day, and a pudding added
+thereunto, I will allow you to cultivate
+my judgment, if you will permit me to
+keep alive the sentiments in your heart,
+which may be termed romantic, because,
+the offspring of the senses and
+the imagination, they resemble the
+mother more than the father<a name="FNanchor_50-A_16" id="CFNanchor_50-A_16"></a><a href="#CFootnote_50-A_16" class="fnanchor">[50-A]</a>, when
+they produce the suffusion I admire.&mdash;In
+spite of icy age, I hope still to see it,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-51" id="CPg_3-51"></a>[<a href="images/v3-51.png">51</a>]</span>
+if you have not determined only to
+eat and drink, and be stupidly useful
+to the stupid&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">H&mdash;, August 19, Tuesday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I received</span> both your letters to-day&mdash;I
+had reckoned on hearing from you
+yesterday, therefore was disappointed,
+though I imputed your silence to the
+right cause. I intended answering
+your kind letter immediately, that you
+might have felt the pleasure it gave
+me; but &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; came in, and some<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-52" id="CPg_3-52"></a>[<a href="images/v3-52.png">52</a>]</span>
+other things interrupted me; so that
+the fine vapour has evaporated&mdash;yet,
+leaving a sweet scent behind, I have
+only to tell you, what is sufficiently
+obvious, that the earnest desire I have
+shown to keep my place, or gain more
+ground in your heart, is a sure proof
+how necessary your affection is to my
+happiness.&mdash;Still I do not think it false
+delicacy, or foolish pride, to wish that
+your attention to my happiness should
+arise <i>as much</i> from love, which is always
+rather a selfish passion, as reason&mdash;that
+is, I want you to promote my
+felicity, by seeking your own.&mdash;For,
+whatever pleasure it may give me to
+discover your generosity of soul, I
+would not be dependent for your affection
+on the very quality I most admire.
+No; there are qualities in your
+heart, which demand my affection;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-53" id="CPg_3-53"></a>[<a href="images/v3-53.png">53</a>]</span>
+but, unless the attachment appears to
+me clearly mutual, I shall labour only
+to esteem your character, instead of
+cherishing a tenderness for your person.</p>
+
+<p>I write in a hurry, because the little
+one, who has been sleeping a long time,
+begins to call for me. Poor thing!
+when I am sad, I lament that all my
+affections grow on me, till they become
+too strong for my peace, though they
+all afford me snatches of exquisite enjoyment&mdash;This
+for our little girl was at
+first very reasonable&mdash;more the effect
+of reason, a sense of duty, than feeling&mdash;now,
+she has got into my heart
+and imagination, and when I walk out
+without her, her little figure is ever
+dancing before me.</p>
+
+<p>You too have somehow clung round
+my heart&mdash;I found I could not eat my<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-54" id="CPg_3-54"></a>[<a href="images/v3-54.png">54</a>]</span>
+dinner in the great room&mdash;and, when
+I took up the large knife to carve for
+myself, tears rushed into my eyes.&mdash;Do
+not however suppose that I am melancholy&mdash;for,
+when you are from me,
+I not only wonder how I can find fault
+with you&mdash;but how I can doubt your
+affection.</p>
+
+<p>I will not mix any comments on the
+inclosed (it roused my indignation)
+with the effusion of tenderness, with
+which I assure you, that you are the
+friend of my bosom, and the prop of my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-55" id="CPg_3-55"></a>[<a href="images/v3-55.png">55</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">H&mdash;, August 20.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I want</span> to know what steps you
+have taken respecting &mdash;&mdash;. Knavery
+always rouses my indignation&mdash;I should
+be gratified to hear that the law had
+chastised &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; severely; but I do not
+wish you to see him, because the business
+does not now admit of peaceful
+discussion, and I do not exactly know
+how you would express your contempt.</p>
+
+<p>Pray ask some questions about Tallien&mdash;I
+am still pleased with the dignity
+of his conduct.&mdash;The other day, in the
+cause of humanity, he made use of a
+degree of address, which I admire<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-56" id="CPg_3-56"></a>[<a href="images/v3-56.png">56</a>]</span>&mdash;and
+mean to point out to you, as one
+of the few instances of address which
+do credit to the abilities of the man,
+without taking away from that confidence
+in his openness of heart, which
+is the true basis of both public and
+private friendship.</p>
+
+<p>Do not suppose that I mean to allude
+to a little reserve of temper in you,
+of which I have sometimes complained!
+You have been used to a
+cunning woman, and you almost look
+for cunning&mdash;Nay, in <i>managing</i> my
+happiness, you now and then wounded
+my sensibility, concealing yourself, till
+honest sympathy, giving you to me
+without disguise, lets me look into a
+heart, which my half-broken one wishes
+to creep into, to be revived and
+cherished.&mdash;&mdash;You have frankness of
+heart, but not often exactly that over<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-57" id="CPg_3-57"></a>[<a href="images/v3-57.png">57</a>]</span>flowing
+(<i>&eacute;panchement de c&oelig;ur</i>), which
+becoming almost childish, appears a
+weakness only to the weak.</p>
+
+<p>But I have left poor Tallien. I
+wanted you to enquire likewise whether,
+as a member declared in the convention,
+Robespierre really maintained
+a <i>number</i> of mistresses.&mdash;Should it prove
+so, I suspect that they rather flattered
+his vanity than his senses.</p>
+
+<p>Here is a chatting, desultory epistle!
+But do not suppose that I mean to
+close it without mentioning the little
+damsel&mdash;who has been almost springing
+out of my arm&mdash;she certainly looks
+very like you&mdash;but I do not love her
+the less for that, whether I am angry
+or pleased with you.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-58" id="CPg_3-58"></a>[<a href="images/v3-58.png">58</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXIII<a name="FNanchor_58-A_17" id="CFNanchor_58-A_17"></a><a href="#CFootnote_58-A_17" class="fnanchor">[58-A]</a>.</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 22.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just written two letters, that
+are going by other conveyances, and
+which I reckon on your receiving long
+before this. I therefore merely write,
+because I know I should be disappointed
+at seeing any one who had left you,
+if you did not send a letter, were it ever
+so short, to tell me why you did not
+write a longer&mdash;and you will want to
+be told, over and over again, that our
+little Hercules is quite recovered.</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-59" id="CPg_3-59"></a>[<a href="images/v3-59.png">59</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Besides looking at me, there are
+three other things, which delight her&mdash;to
+ride in a coach, to look at a scarlet
+waistcoat, and hear loud music&mdash;yesterday,
+at the <i>f&ecirc;te</i>, she enjoyed the two
+latter; but, to honour J. J. Rousseau,
+I intend to give her a sash, the first she
+has ever had round her&mdash;and why not?&mdash;for
+I have always been half in love
+with him.</p>
+
+<p>Well, this you will say is trifling&mdash;shall
+I talk about alum or soap? There
+is nothing picturesque in your present
+pursuits; my imagination then rather
+chuses to ramble back to the barrier
+with you, or to see you coming to
+meet me, and my basket of grapes.&mdash;With
+what pleasure do I recollect your
+looks and words, when I have been
+sitting on the window, regarding the
+waving corn!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-60" id="CPg_3-60"></a>[<a href="images/v3-60.png">60</a>]</span>
+Believe me, sage sir, you have not
+sufficient respect for the imagination&mdash;I
+could prove to you in a trice that it is
+the mother of sentiment, the great
+distinction of our nature, the only purifier
+of the passions&mdash;animals have a
+portion of reason, and equal, if not
+more exquisite, senses; but no trace of
+imagination, or her offspring taste, appears
+in any of their actions. The impulse
+of the senses, passions, if you will,
+and the conclusions of reason, draw
+men together; but the imagination is
+the true fire, stolen from heaven, to
+animate this cold creature of clay, producing
+all those fine sympathies that
+lead to rapture, rendering men social
+by expanding their hearts, instead of
+leaving them leisure to calculate how
+many comforts society affords.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-61" id="CPg_3-61"></a>[<a href="images/v3-61.png">61</a>]</span>
+If you call these observations romantic,
+a phrase in this place which would
+be tantamount to nonsensical, I shall
+be apt to retort, that you are embruted
+by trade, and the vulgar enjoyments of
+life&mdash;Bring me then back your barrier-face,
+or you shall have nothing to say
+to my barrier-girl; and I shall fly from
+you, to cherish the remembrances that
+will ever be dear to me; for I am
+yours truly</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-62" id="CPg_3-62"></a>[<a href="images/v3-62.png">62</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Evening, Sept. 23.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been playing and laughing
+with the little girl so long, that I cannot
+take up my pen to address you
+without emotion. Pressing her to my
+bosom, she looked so like you (<i>entre
+nous</i>, your best looks, for I do not admire
+your commercial face) every nerve
+seemed to vibrate to the touch, and I
+began to think that there was something
+in the assertion of man and wife
+being one&mdash;for you seemed to pervade
+my whole frame, quickening the beat
+of my heart, and lending me the sympathetic
+tears you excited.</p>
+
+<p>Have I any thing more to say to you?
+No; not for the present&mdash;the rest is all<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-63" id="CPg_3-63"></a>[<a href="images/v3-63.png">63</a>]</span>
+flown away; and, indulging tenderness
+for you, I cannot now complain of
+some people here, who have ruffled my
+temper for two or three days past.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p class="right">Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Yesterday</span> B&mdash;&mdash; sent to me for
+my packet of letters. He called on me
+before; and I like him better than I
+did&mdash;that is, I have the same opinion
+of his understanding, but I think with
+you, he has more tenderness and real
+delicacy of feeling with respect to women,
+than are commonly to be met with.
+His manner too of speaking of his little
+girl, about the age of mine, interested
+me. I gave him a letter for my sister,
+and requested him to see her.</p>
+
+<p>I have been interrupted. Mr. &mdash;&mdash;
+I suppose will write about business.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-64" id="CPg_3-64"></a>[<a href="images/v3-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+Public affairs I do not descant on, except
+to tell you that they write now
+with great freedom and truth, and this
+liberty of the press will overthrow the
+Jacobins, I plainly perceive.</p>
+
+<p>I hope you take care of your health.
+I have got a habit of restlessness at
+night, which arises, I believe, from
+activity of mind; for, when I am alone,
+that is, not near one to whom I can
+open my heart, I sink into reveries and
+trains of thinking, which agitate and
+fatigue me.</p>
+
+<p>This is my third letter; when am I
+to hear from you? I need not tell you,
+I suppose, that I am now writing with
+somebody in the room with me, and
+&mdash;&mdash; is waiting to carry this to Mr.
+&mdash;&mdash;'s. I will then kiss the girl for
+you, and bid you adieu.</p>
+
+<p>I desired you, in one of my other<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-65" id="CPg_3-65"></a>[<a href="images/v3-65.png">65</a>]</span>
+letters, to bring back to me your barrier-face&mdash;or
+that you should not be
+loved by my barrier-girl. I know that
+you will love her more and more, for
+she is a little affectionate, intelligent
+creature, with as much vivacity, I
+should think, as you could wish for.</p>
+
+<p>I was going to tell you of two or
+three things which displease me here;
+but they are not of sufficient consequence
+to interrupt pleasing sensations.
+I have received a letter from
+Mr. &mdash;&mdash;. I want you to bring &mdash;&mdash;
+with you. Madame S&mdash;&mdash; is by me,
+reading a German translation of your
+letters&mdash;she desires me to give her love
+to you, on account of what you say of
+the negroes.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours most affectionately, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-66" id="CPg_3-66"></a>[<a href="images/v3-66.png">66</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Paris, Sept. 28.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> written to you three or four
+letters; but different causes have prevented
+my sending them by the persons
+who promised to take or forward them.
+The inclosed is one I wrote to go by
+B&mdash;&mdash;; yet, finding that he will not
+arrive, before I hope, and believe, you
+will have set out on your return, I
+inclose it to you, and shall give it in
+charge to &mdash;&mdash;, as Mr. &mdash;&mdash; is detained,
+to whom I also gave a letter.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot help being anxious to hear
+from you; but I shall not harrass you
+with accounts of inquietudes, or of
+cares that arise from peculiar circumstances.&mdash;I
+have had so many little<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-67" id="CPg_3-67"></a>[<a href="images/v3-67.png">67</a>]</span>
+plagues here, that I have almost lamented
+that I left H&mdash;&mdash;. &mdash;&mdash;, who
+is at best a most helpless creature, is
+now, on account of her pregnancy,
+more trouble than use to me, so that I
+still continue to be almost a slave to the
+child.&mdash;She indeed rewards me, for
+she is a sweet little creature; for, setting
+aside a mother's fondness (which,
+by the bye, is growing on me, her little
+intelligent smiles sinking into my heart),
+she has an astonishing degree of sensibility
+and observation. The other day
+by B&mdash;&mdash;'s child, a fine one, she looked
+like a little sprite.&mdash;She is all life and
+motion, and her eyes are not the eyes
+of a fool&mdash;I will swear.</p>
+
+<p>I slept at St. Germain's, in the very
+room (if you have not forgot) in which
+you pressed me very tenderly to your
+heart.&mdash;I did not forget to fold my<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-68" id="CPg_3-68"></a>[<a href="images/v3-68.png">68</a>]</span>
+darling to mine, with sensations that
+are almost too sacred to be alluded to.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu, my love! Take care of yourself,
+if you wish to be the protector of
+your child, and the comfort of her
+mother.</p>
+
+<p>I have received, for you, letters from
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. I want to hear how that
+affair finishes, though I do not know
+whether I have most contempt for his
+folly or knavery.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Your own &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-69" id="CPg_3-69"></a>[<a href="images/v3-69.png">69</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">October 1.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is a heartless task to write letters,
+without knowing whether they will
+ever reach you.&mdash;I have given two to
+&mdash;&mdash;, who has been a-going, a-going,
+every day, for a week past; and three
+others, which were written in a low-spirited
+strain, a little querulous or so,
+I have not been able to forward by the
+opportunities that were mentioned to
+me. <i>Tant mieux!</i> you will say, and I
+will not say nay; for I should be sorry
+that the contents of a letter, when you
+are so far away, should damp the pleasure
+that the sight of it would afford&mdash;judging
+of your feelings by my own.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-70" id="CPg_3-70"></a>[<a href="images/v3-70.png">70</a>]</span>
+I just now stumbled on one of the kind
+letters, which you wrote during your
+last absence. You are then a dear
+affectionate creature, and I will not
+plague you. The letter which you
+chance to receive, when the absence is
+so long, ought to bring only tears of
+tenderness, without any bitter alloy,
+into your eyes.</p>
+
+<p>After your return I hope indeed,
+that you will not be so immersed in
+business, as during the last three or
+four months past&mdash;for even money, taking
+into the account all the future comforts
+it is to procure, may be gained at
+too dear a rate, if painful impressions
+are left on the mind.&mdash;These impressions
+were much more lively, soon after
+you went away, than at present&mdash;for a
+thousand tender recollections efface the
+melancholy traces they left on my mind<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-71" id="CPg_3-71"></a>[<a href="images/v3-71.png">71</a>]</span>&mdash;and
+every emotion is on the same side
+as my reason, which always was on
+yours.&mdash;Separated, it would be almost
+impious to dwell on real or imaginary
+imperfections of character.&mdash;I feel that
+I love you; and, if I cannot be happy
+with you, I will seek it no where else.</p>
+
+<p>My little darling grows every day
+more dear to me&mdash;and she often has a
+kiss, when we are alone together,
+which I give her for you, with all my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>I have been interrupted&mdash;and must
+send off my letter. The liberty of the
+press will produce a great effect here&mdash;the
+<i>cry of blood will not be vain</i>!&mdash;Some
+more monsters will perish&mdash;and the
+Jacobins are conquered.&mdash;Yet I almost
+fear the last slap of the tail of the
+beast.</p>
+
+<p>I have had several trifling teazing<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-72" id="CPg_3-72"></a>[<a href="images/v3-72.png">72</a>]</span>
+inconveniencies here, which I shall not
+now trouble you with a detail of.&mdash;I
+am sending &mdash;&mdash; back; her pregnancy
+rendered her useless. The girl I have
+got has more vivacity, which is better
+for the child.</p>
+
+<p>I long to hear from you.&mdash;Bring a
+copy of &mdash;&mdash; and &mdash;&mdash; with you.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; is still here: he is a lost man.&mdash;He
+really loves his wife, and is anxious
+about his children; but his indiscriminate
+hospitality and social feelings have
+given him an inveterate habit of drinking,
+that destroys his health, as well as
+renders his person disgusting.&mdash;If his
+wife had more sense, or delicacy, she
+might restrain him: as it is, nothing
+will save him.</p>
+
+<p>Yours most truly and affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-73" id="CPg_3-73"></a>[<a href="images/v3-73.png">73</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">October 26.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> dear love, I began to wish so earnestly
+to hear from you, that the sight
+of your letters occasioned such pleasurable
+emotions, I was obliged to throw
+them aside till the little girl and I were
+alone together; and this said little girl,
+our darling, is become a most intelligent
+little creature, and as gay as a lark,
+and that in the morning too, which I
+do not find quite so convenient. I
+once told you, that the sensations before
+she was born, and when she is
+sucking, were pleasant; but they do
+not deserve to be compared to the emotions
+I feel, when she stops to smile<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-74" id="CPg_3-74"></a>[<a href="images/v3-74.png">74</a>]</span>
+upon me, or laughs outright on meeting
+me unexpectedly in the street, or
+after a short absence. She has now the
+advantage of having two good nurses,
+and I am at present able to discharge
+my duty to her, without being the
+slave of it.</p>
+
+<p>I have therefore employed and amused
+myself since I got rid of &mdash;&mdash;, and am
+making a progress in the language
+amongst other things. I have also made
+some new acquaintance. I have almost
+<i>charmed</i> a judge of the tribunal, R&mdash;&mdash;,
+who, though I should not have thought
+it possible, has humanity, if not <i>beaucoup
+d'esprit</i>. But let me tell you, if you do
+not make haste back, I shall be half in
+love with the author of the <i>Marseillaise</i>,
+who is a handsome man, a little
+too broad-faced or so, and plays sweetly
+on the violin.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-75" id="CPg_3-75"></a>[<a href="images/v3-75.png">75</a>]</span>
+What do you say to this threat?&mdash;why,
+<i>entre nous</i>, I like to give way to
+a sprightly vein, when writing to you,
+that is, when I am pleased with you.
+"The devil," you know, is proverbially
+said to be "in a good humour, when
+he is pleased." Will you not then be
+a good boy, and come back quickly to
+play with your girls? but I shall not allow
+you to love the new-comer best.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>My heart longs for your return, my
+love, and only looks for, and seeks happiness
+with you; yet do not imagine
+that I childishly wish you to come back,
+before you have arranged things in
+such a manner, that it will not be necessary
+for you to leave us soon again;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-76" id="CPg_3-76"></a>[<a href="images/v3-76.png">76</a>]</span>
+or to make exertions which injure your
+constitution.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours most truly and tenderly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>P.S. "You would oblige me by delivering
+the inclosed to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;, and
+pray call for an answer.&mdash;It is for a person
+uncomfortably situated.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Dec. 26.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been, my love, for some days
+tormented by fears, that I would not
+allow to assume a form&mdash;I had been
+expecting you daily&mdash;and I heard that
+many vessels had been driven on shore
+during the late gale.&mdash;Well, I now see<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-77" id="CPg_3-77"></a>[<a href="images/v3-77.png">77</a>]</span>
+your letter&mdash;and find that you are safe;
+I will not regret then that your exertions
+have hitherto been so unavailing.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Be that as it may, return to me when
+you have arranged the other matters,
+which &mdash;&mdash; has been crowding on you.
+I want to be sure that you are safe&mdash;and
+not separated from me by a sea that
+must be passed. For, feeling that I am
+happier than I ever was, do you wonder
+at my sometimes dreading that fate
+has not done persecuting me? Come
+to me, my dearest friend, husband, father
+of my child!&mdash;All these fond ties
+glow at my heart at this moment, and
+dim my eyes.&mdash;With you an independence
+is desirable; and it is always
+within our reach, if affluence escapes<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-78" id="CPg_3-78"></a>[<a href="images/v3-78.png">78</a>]</span>
+us&mdash;without you the world again appears
+empty to me. But I am recurring
+to some of the melancholy thoughts
+that have flitted across my mind for
+some days past, and haunted my
+dreams.</p>
+
+<p>My little darling is indeed a sweet
+child; and I am sorry that you are not
+here, to see her little mind unfold itself.
+You talk of "dalliance;" but certainly
+no lover was ever more attached to his
+mistress, than she is to me. Her eyes
+follow me every where, and by affection
+I have the most despotic power
+over her. She is all vivacity or softness&mdash;yes;
+I love her more than I
+thought I should. When I have been
+hurt at your stay, I have embraced her
+as my only comfort&mdash;when pleased with
+you, for looking and laughing like
+you; nay, I cannot, I find, long be an<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-79" id="CPg_3-79"></a>[<a href="images/v3-79.png">79</a>]</span>gry
+with you, whilst I am kissing her
+for resembling you. But there would
+be no end to these details. Fold us
+both to your heart; for I am truly and
+affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">December 28.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>I do, my love, indeed sincerely
+sympathize with you in all your disappointments.&mdash;Yet,
+knowing that you
+are well, and think of me with affec<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-80" id="CPg_3-80"></a>[<a href="images/v3-80.png">80</a>]</span>tion,
+I only lament other disappointments,
+because I am sorry that you
+should thus exert yourself in vain, and
+that you are kept from me.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, I know, urges you to stay,
+and is continually branching out into
+new projects, because he has the idle
+desire to amass a large fortune, rather
+an immense one, merely to have the
+credit of having made it. But we
+who are governed by other motives,
+ought not to be led on by him. When
+we meet, we will discuss this subject&mdash;You
+will listen to reason, and it has
+probably occurred to you, that it will
+be better, in future, to pursue some
+sober plan, which may demand more
+time, and still enable you to arrive at
+the same end. It appears to me absurd
+to waste life in preparing to live.</p>
+
+<p>Would it not now be possible to ar<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-81" id="CPg_3-81"></a>[<a href="images/v3-81.png">81</a>]</span>range
+your business in such a manner
+as to avoid the inquietudes, of which
+I have had my share since your departure?
+Is it not possible to enter into
+business, as an employment necessary
+to keep the faculties awake, and (to
+sink a little in the expressions) the pot
+boiling, without suffering what must
+ever be considered as a secondary object,
+to engross the mind, and drive
+sentiment and affection out of the
+heart?</p>
+
+<p>I am in a hurry to give this letter to
+the person who has promised to forward
+it with &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s. I wish then to
+counteract, in some measure, what
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'he he'">he</ins> has doubtless recommended most
+warmly.</p>
+
+<p>Stay, my friend, whilst it is <i>absolutely</i>
+necessary.&mdash;I will give you no tenderer
+name, though it glows at my heart,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-82" id="CPg_3-82"></a>[<a href="images/v3-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+unless you come the moment the settling
+the <i>present</i> objects permit.&mdash;<i>I do not
+consent</i> to your taking any other journey&mdash;or
+the little woman and I will be
+off, the Lord knows where. But, as I
+had rather owe every thing to your affection,
+and, I may add, to your reason,
+(for this immoderate desire of
+wealth, which makes &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; so eager
+to have you remain, is contrary to your
+principles of action), I will not importune
+you.&mdash;I will only tell you, that I
+long to see you&mdash;and, being at peace
+with you, I shall be hurt, rather than
+made angry, by delays.&mdash;Having suffered
+so much in life, do not be surprised
+if I sometimes, when left to
+myself, grow gloomy, and suppose that
+it was all a dream, and that my happiness
+is not to last. I say happiness,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-83" id="CPg_3-83"></a>[<a href="images/v3-83.png">83</a>]</span>
+because remembrance retrenches all
+the dark shades of the picture.</p>
+
+<p>My little one begins to show her
+teeth, and use her legs&mdash;She wants you
+to bear your part in the nursing business,
+for I am fatigued with dancing
+her, and yet she is not satisfied&mdash;she
+wants you to thank her mother for taking
+such care of her, as you only can.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">December 29.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Though</span> I suppose you have later
+intelligence, yet, as &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has just
+informed me that he has an opportuni<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-84" id="CPg_3-84"></a>[<a href="images/v3-84.png">84</a>]</span>ty
+of sending immediately to you, I
+take advantage of it to inclose you</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>How I hate this crooked business!
+This intercourse with the world, which
+obliges one to see the worst side of
+human nature! Why cannot you be
+content with the object you had first in
+view, when you entered into this wearisome
+labyrinth?&mdash;I know very well
+that you have imperceptibly been
+drawn on; yet why does one project,
+successful or abortive, only give place
+to two others? Is it not sufficient to
+avoid poverty?&mdash;I am contented to do
+my part; and, even here, sufficient to
+escape from wretchedness is not difficult
+to obtain. And, let me tell you,
+I have my project also&mdash;and, if you do
+not soon return, the little girl and I
+will take care of ourselves; we will not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-85" id="CPg_3-85"></a>[<a href="images/v3-85.png">85</a>]</span>
+accept any of your cold kindness&mdash;your
+distant civilities&mdash;no; not we.</p>
+
+<p>This is but half jesting, for I am
+really tormented by the desire which
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; manifests to have you remain
+where you are.&mdash;Yet why do I talk to
+you?&mdash;If he can persuade you&mdash;let him!&mdash;for,
+if you are not happier with me,
+and your own wishes do not make you
+throw aside these eternal projects, I am
+above using any arguments, though
+reason as well as affection seems to offer
+them&mdash;if our affection be mutual,
+they will occur to you&mdash;and you will
+act accordingly.</p>
+
+<p>Since my arrival here, I have found
+the German lady, of whom you have
+heard me speak. Her first child died
+in the month; but she has another,
+about the age of my &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, a fine
+little creature. They are still but con<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-86" id="CPg_3-86"></a>[<a href="images/v3-86.png">86</a>]</span>triving
+to live&mdash;&mdash;earning their daily
+bread&mdash;yet, though they are but just
+above poverty, I envy them.&mdash;She is a
+tender, affectionate mother&mdash;fatigued
+even by her attention.&mdash;However she
+has an affectionate husband in her turn,
+to render her care light, and to share
+her pleasure.</p>
+
+<p>I will own to you that, feeling extreme
+tenderness for my little girl, I
+grow sad very often when I am playing
+with her, that you are not here, to
+observe with me how her mind unfolds,
+and her little heart becomes attached!&mdash;These
+appear to me to be true pleasures&mdash;and
+still you suffer them to escape
+you, in search of what we may
+never enjoy.&mdash;It is your own maxim to
+"live in the present moment."&mdash;<i>If you
+do</i>&mdash;stay, for God's sake; but tell me
+the truth&mdash;if not, tell me when I may<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-87" id="CPg_3-87"></a>[<a href="images/v3-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+expect to see you, and let me not be
+always vainly looking for you, till I
+grow sick at heart.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! I am a little hurt.&mdash;I must
+take my darling to my bosom to comfort
+me.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">December 30.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Should</span> you receive three or four of
+the letters at once which I have written
+lately, do not think of Sir John
+Brute, for I do not mean to wife you.
+I only take advantage of every occasion,
+that one out of three of my
+epistles may reach your hands, and in<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-88" id="CPg_3-88"></a>[<a href="images/v3-88.png">88</a>]</span>form
+you that I am not of &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+opinion, who talks till he makes me
+angry, of the necessity of your staying
+two or three months longer. I do not
+like this life of continual inquietude&mdash;and,
+<i>entre nous</i>, I am determined to try
+to earn some money here myself, in
+order to convince you that, if you
+chuse to run about the world to get a
+fortune, it is for yourself&mdash;for the little
+girl and I will live without your assistance,
+unless you are with us. I may
+be termed proud&mdash;Be it so&mdash;but I will
+never abandon certain principles of
+action.</p>
+
+<p>The common run of men have such
+an ignoble way of thinking, that, if
+they debauch their hearts, and prostitute
+their persons, following perhaps a
+gust of inebriation, they suppose the
+wife, slave rather, whom they main<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-89" id="CPg_3-89"></a>[<a href="images/v3-89.png">89</a>]</span>tain,
+has no right to complain, and
+ought to receive the sultan, whenever
+he deigns to return, with open arms,
+though his have been polluted by half
+an hundred promiscuous amours during
+his absence.</p>
+
+<p>I consider fidelity and constancy as
+two distinct things; yet the former is
+necessary, to give life to the other&mdash;and
+such a degree of respect do I think
+due to myself, that, if only probity,
+which is a good thing in its place,
+brings you back, never return!&mdash;for,
+if a wandering of the heart, or even a
+caprice of the imagination detains
+you&mdash;there is an end of all my hopes of
+happiness&mdash;I could not forgive it, if I
+would.</p>
+
+<p>I have gotten into a melancholy
+mood, you perceive. You know my
+opinion of men in general; you know<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-90" id="CPg_3-90"></a>[<a href="images/v3-90.png">90</a>]</span>
+that I think them systematic tyrants, and
+that it is the rarest thing in the world,
+to meet with a man with sufficient
+delicacy of feeling to govern desire.
+When I am thus sad, I lament that my
+little darling, fondly as I doat on her,
+is a girl.&mdash;I am sorry to have a tie to a
+world that for me is ever sown with
+thorns.</p>
+
+<p>You will call this an ill-humoured
+letter, when, in fact, it is the strongest
+proof of affection I can give, to dread
+to lose you. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has taken such
+pains to convince me that you must
+and ought to stay, that it has inconceivably
+depressed my spirits&mdash;You
+have always known my opinion&mdash;I have
+ever declared, that two people, who
+mean to live together, ought not to be
+long separated.&mdash;If certain things are
+more necessary to you than me&mdash;search<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-91" id="CPg_3-91"></a>[<a href="images/v3-91.png">91</a>]</span>
+for them&mdash;Say but one word, and you
+shall never hear of me more.&mdash;If not&mdash;for
+God's sake, let us struggle with
+poverty&mdash;with any evil, but these continual
+inquietudes of business, which
+I have been told were to last but a few
+months, though every day the end appears
+more distant! This is the first
+letter in this strain that I have determined
+to forward to you; the rest lie
+by, because I was unwilling to give you
+pain, and I should not now write, if I
+did not think that there would be no
+conclusion to the schemes, which demand,
+as I am told, your presence.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *<a name="FNanchor_91-A_18" id="CFNanchor_91-A_18"></a><a href="#CFootnote_91-A_18" class="fnanchor">[91-A]</a></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-92" id="CPg_3-92"></a>[<a href="images/v3-92.png">92</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXXII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">January 9.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I just</span> now received one of your
+hasty <i>notes</i>; for business so entirely occupies
+you, that you have not time, or
+sufficient command of thought, to write
+letters. Beware! you seem to be got
+into a whirl of projects and schemes,
+which are drawing you into a gulph,
+that, if it do not absorb your happiness,
+will infallibly destroy mine.</p>
+
+<p>Fatigued during my youth by the
+most arduous struggles, not only to obtain
+independence, but to render myself
+useful, not merely pleasure, for
+which I had the most lively taste, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-93" id="CPg_3-93"></a>[<a href="images/v3-93.png">93</a>]</span>
+mean the simple pleasures that flow from
+passion and affection, escaped me, but
+the most melancholy views of life were
+impressed by a disappointed heart on
+my mind. Since I knew you, I have
+been endeavouring to go back to my
+former nature, and have allowed some
+time to glide away, winged with the
+delight which only spontaneous enjoyment
+can give.&mdash;Why have you so
+soon dissolved the charm?</p>
+
+<p>I am really unable to bear the continual
+inquietude which your and
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s never-ending plans produce.
+This you may term want of firmness&mdash;but
+you are mistaken&mdash;I have still sufficient
+firmness to pursue my principle
+of action. The present misery, I cannot
+find a softer word to do justice to
+my feelings, appears to me unneces<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-94" id="CPg_3-94"></a>[<a href="images/v3-94.png">94</a>]</span>sary&mdash;and
+therefore I have not firmness
+to support it as you may think I
+ought. I should have been content,
+and still wish, to retire with you to a
+farm&mdash;My God! any thing, but these
+continual anxieties&mdash;any thing but
+commerce, which debases the mind,
+and roots out affection from the heart.</p>
+
+<p>I do not mean to complain of subordinate
+inconveniences&mdash;&mdash;yet I will
+simply observe, that, led to expect
+you every week, I did not make the
+arrangements required by the present
+circumstances, to procure the necessaries
+of life. In order to have them,
+a servant, for that purpose only, is indispensible&mdash;The
+want of wood, has made
+me catch the most violent cold I ever
+had; and my head is so disturbed by
+continual coughing, that I am unable<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-95" id="CPg_3-95"></a>[<a href="images/v3-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+to write without stopping frequently to
+recollect myself.&mdash;This however is one
+of the common evils which must be
+borne with&mdash;&mdash;bodily pain does not
+touch the heart, though it fatigues the
+spirits.</p>
+
+<p>Still as you talk of your return, even
+in February, doubtingly, I have determined,
+the moment the weather
+changes, to wean my child.&mdash;It is too
+soon for her to begin to divide sorrow!&mdash;And
+as one has well said, "despair is a
+freeman," we will go and seek our fortune
+together.</p>
+
+<p>This is not a caprice of the moment&mdash;for
+your absence has given new
+weight to some conclusions, that I was
+very reluctantly forming before you
+left me.&mdash;I do not chuse to be a secondary
+object.&mdash;If your feelings were
+in unison with mine, you would not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-96" id="CPg_3-96"></a>[<a href="images/v3-96.png">96</a>]</span>
+sacrifice so much to visionary prospects
+of future advantage.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Jan. <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added missing period">15.</ins></p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I was</span> just going to begin my letter
+with the fag end of a song, which would
+only have told you, what I may as well
+say simply, that it is pleasant to forgive
+those we love. I have received your
+two letters, dated the 26th and 28th
+of December, and my anger died away.
+You can scarcely conceive the effect
+some of your letters have produced on
+me. After longing to hear from you
+during a tedious interval of suspense,
+I have seen a superscription written by<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-97" id="CPg_3-97"></a>[<a href="images/v3-97.png">97</a>]</span>
+you.&mdash;Promising myself pleasure, and
+feeling emotion, I have laid it by me,
+till the person who brought it, left the
+room&mdash;when, behold! on opening it,
+I have found only half a dozen hasty
+lines, that have damped all the rising
+affection of my soul.</p>
+
+<p>Well, now for business&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>My animal is well; I have not yet
+taught her to eat, but nature is doing
+the business. I gave her a crust to assist
+the cutting of her teeth; and now
+she has two, she makes good use of
+them to gnaw a crust, biscuit, &amp;c. You
+would laugh to see her; she is just like
+a little squirrel; she will guard a crust
+for two hours; and, after fixing her
+eye on an object for some time, dart<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-98" id="CPg_3-98"></a>[<a href="images/v3-98.png">98</a>]</span>
+on it with an aim as sure as a bird of
+prey&mdash;nothing can equal her life and
+spirits. I suffer from a cold; but it
+does not affect her. Adieu! do not
+forget to love us&mdash;and come soon to
+tell us that you do.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Jan. 30.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">From</span> the purport of your last letters,
+I would suppose that this will
+scarcely reach you; and I have already
+written so many letters, that
+you have either not received, or neglected
+to acknowledge, I do not find
+it pleasant, or rather I have no inclination,
+to go over the same ground<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-99" id="CPg_3-99"></a>[<a href="images/v3-99.png">99</a>]</span>
+again. If you have received them, and
+are still detained by new projects, it is
+useless for me to say any more on the
+subject. I have done with it for ever<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '-'">&mdash;</ins>yet
+I ought to remind you that your pecuniary
+interest suffers by your absence.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>For my part, my head is turned giddy,
+by only hearing of plans to make
+money, and my contemptuous feelings
+have sometimes burst out. I therefore
+was glad that a violent cold gave me a
+pretext to stay at home, lest I should
+have uttered unseasonable truths.</p>
+
+<p>My child is well, and the spring
+will perhaps restore me to myself.&mdash;I
+have endured many inconveniences<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-100" id="CPg_3-100"></a>[<a href="images/v3-100.png">100</a>]</span>
+this winter, which should I be ashamed
+to mention, if they had been unavoidable.
+"The secondary pleasures of life,"
+you say, "are very necessary to my comfort:"
+it may be so; but I have ever
+considered them as secondary. If therefore
+you accuse me of wanting the resolution
+necessary to bear the <i>common</i><a name="FNanchor_100-A_19" id="CFNanchor_100-A_19"></a><a href="#CFootnote_100-A_19" class="fnanchor">[100-A]</a>
+evils of life; I should answer, that I
+have not fashioned my mind to sustain
+them, because I would avoid them,
+cost what it would&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-101" id="CPg_3-101"></a>[<a href="images/v3-101.png">101</a>]</span></p>
+
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">February 9.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> melancholy presentiment has for
+some time hung on my spirits, that we
+were parted for ever; and the letters I
+received this day, by Mr. &mdash;&mdash;, convince
+me that it was not without foundation.
+You allude to some other
+letters, which I suppose have miscarried;
+for most of those I have got, were
+only a few hasty lines, calculated to
+wound the tenderness the sight of the
+superscriptions excited.</p>
+
+<p>I mean not however to complain;
+yet so many feelings are struggling for
+utterance, and agitating a heart almost
+bursting with anguish, that I find it<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-102" id="CPg_3-102"></a>[<a href="images/v3-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+very difficult to write with any degree
+of coherence.</p>
+
+<p>You left me indisposed, though you
+have taken no notice of it; and the
+most fatiguing journey I ever had, contributed
+to continue it. However, I
+recovered my health; but a neglected
+cold, and continual inquietude during
+the last two months, have reduced me
+to a state of weakness I never before
+experienced. Those who did not know
+that the canker-worm was at work at
+the core, cautioned me about suckling
+my child too long.&mdash;God preserve this
+poor child, and render her happier
+than her mother!</p>
+
+<p>But I am wandering from my subject:
+indeed my head turns giddy, when I
+think that all the confidence I have had
+in the affection of others is come to this.</p>
+
+<p>I did not expect this blow from you.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-103" id="CPg_3-103"></a>[<a href="images/v3-103.png">103</a>]</span>
+I have done my duty to you and my
+child; and if I am not to have any
+return of affection to reward me, I
+have the sad consolation of knowing
+that I deserved a better fate. My
+soul is weary&mdash;I am sick at heart; and,
+but for this little darling, I would
+cease to care about a life, which is now
+stripped of every charm.</p>
+
+<p>You see how stupid I am, uttering
+declamation, when I meant simply to
+tell you, that I consider your requesting
+me to come to you, as merely dictated
+by honour.&mdash;Indeed, I scarcely understand
+you.&mdash;You request me to come,
+and then tell me, that you have not
+given up all thoughts of returning to
+this place.</p>
+
+<p>When I determined to live with you,
+I was only governed by affection.&mdash;I
+would share poverty with you, but I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-104" id="CPg_3-104"></a>[<a href="images/v3-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+turn with affright from the sea of trouble
+on which you are entering.&mdash;I have
+certain principles of action: I know
+what I look for to found my happiness
+on.&mdash;It is not money.&mdash;With you I
+wished for sufficient to procure the
+comforts of life&mdash;as it is, less will
+do.&mdash;I can still exert myself to
+obtain the necessaries of life for my
+child, and she does not want more at
+present.&mdash;I have two or three plans in
+my head to earn our subsistence; for
+do not suppose that, neglected by you,
+I will lie under obligations of a pecuniary
+kind to you!&mdash;No; I would sooner
+submit to menial service.&mdash;I wanted the
+support of your affection&mdash;that gone,
+all is over!&mdash;I did not think, when I
+complained of &mdash;&mdash;'s contemptible avidity
+to accumulate money, that he<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-105" id="CPg_3-105"></a>[<a href="images/v3-105.png">105</a>]</span>
+would have dragged you into his
+schemes.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot write.&mdash;I inclose a fragment
+of a letter, written soon after your
+departure, and another which tenderness
+made me keep back when it was
+written.&mdash;You will see then the sentiments
+of a calmer, though not a more
+determined, moment.&mdash;Do not insult
+me by saying, that "our being together
+is paramount to every other consideration!"
+Were it, you would not be
+running after a bubble, at the expence
+of my peace of mind.</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps this is the last letter you will
+ever receive from me.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-106" id="CPg_3-106"></a>[<a href="images/v3-106.png">106</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Feb. 10.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> talk of "permanent views and
+future comfort"&mdash;not for me, for I am
+dead to hope. The inquietudes of the
+last winter have finished the business,
+and my heart is not only broken, but
+my constitution destroyed. I conceive
+myself in a galloping consumption, and
+the continual anxiety I feel at the
+thought of leaving my child, feeds the
+fever that nightly devours me. It is
+on her account that I again write to
+you, to conjure you, by all that you
+hold sacred, to leave her here with the
+German lady you may have heard me
+mention! She has a child of the same
+age, and they may be brought up to<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-107" id="CPg_3-107"></a>[<a href="images/v3-107.png">107</a>]</span>gether,
+as I wish her to be brought up.
+I shall write more fully on the subject.
+To facilitate this, I shall give up my
+present lodgings, and go into the same
+house. I can live much cheaper there,
+which is now become an object. I have
+had 3000 livres from &mdash;&mdash;, and I shall
+take one more, to pay my servant's
+wages, &amp;c. and then I shall endeavour
+to procure what I want by my own exertions.
+I shall entirely give up the acquaintance
+of the Americans.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; and I have not been on good
+terms a long time. Yesterday he very
+unmanlily exulted over me, on account
+of your determination to stay. I had
+provoked it, it is true, by some asperities
+against commerce, which have
+dropped from me, when we have argued
+about the propriety of your remaining
+where you are; and it is no matter, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-108" id="CPg_3-108"></a>[<a href="images/v3-108.png">108</a>]</span>
+have drunk too deep of the bitter cup
+to care about trifles.</p>
+
+<p>When you first entered into these
+plans, you bounded your views to the
+gaining of a thousand pounds. It was
+sufficient to have procured a farm in
+America, which would have been an
+independence. You find now that you
+did not know yourself, and that a certain
+situation in life is more necessary
+to you than you imagined&mdash;more necessary
+than an uncorrupted heart&mdash;For
+a year or two, you may procure yourself
+what you call pleasure; eating,
+drinking, and women; but, in the solitude
+of declining life, I shall be remembered
+with regret&mdash;I was going to
+say with remorse, but checked my
+pen.</p>
+
+<p>As I have never concealed the nature of
+my connection with you, your repu<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-109" id="CPg_3-109"></a>[<a href="images/v3-109.png">109</a>]</span>tation
+will not suffer. I shall never have
+a confident: I am content with the approbation
+of my own mind; and, if there
+be a searcher of hearts, mine will not
+be despised. Reading what you have
+written relative to the desertion of women,
+I have often wondered how theory
+and practice could be so different, till
+I recollected, that the sentiments of
+passion, and the resolves of reason, are
+very distinct. As to my sisters, as you
+are so continually hurried with business,
+you need not write to them&mdash;I
+shall, when my mind is calmer. God
+bless you! Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>This has been such a period of barbarity
+and misery, I ought not to complain
+of having my share. I wish one
+moment that I had never heard of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-110" id="CPg_3-110"></a>[<a href="images/v3-110.png">110</a>]</span>
+cruelties that have been practised here,
+and the next envy the mothers who
+have been killed with their children.
+Surely I had suffered enough in life,
+not to be cursed with a fondness, that
+burns up the vital stream I am imparting.
+You will think me mad: I
+would I were so, that I could forget
+my misery&mdash;so that my head or heart
+would be still.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Feb. 19.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> I first received your letter,
+putting off your return to an indefinite
+time, I felt so hurt, that I know not
+what I wrote. I am now calmer,
+though it was not the kind of wound<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-111" id="CPg_3-111"></a>[<a href="images/v3-111.png">111</a>]</span>
+over which time has the quickest effect;
+on the contrary, the more I think, the
+sadder I grow. Society fatigues me inexpressibly&mdash;So
+much so, that finding
+fault with every one, I have only reason
+enough, to discover that the fault is
+in myself. My child alone interests
+me, and, but for her, I should not take
+any pains to recover my health.</p>
+
+<p>As it is, I shall wean her, and try if
+by that step (to which I feel a repugnance,
+for it is my only solace) I can
+get rid of my cough. Physicians talk
+much of the danger attending any complaint
+on the lungs, after a woman has
+suckled for some months. They lay a
+stress also on the necessity of keeping
+the mind tranquil&mdash;and, my God! how
+has mine been harrassed! But whilst
+the caprices of other women are gratified,
+"the wind of heaven not suffered<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-112" id="CPg_3-112"></a>[<a href="images/v3-112.png">112</a>]</span>
+to visit them too rudely," I have not
+found a guardian angel, in heaven or
+on earth, to ward off sorrow or care
+from my bosom.</p>
+
+<p>What sacrifices have you not made
+for a woman you did not respect!&mdash;But
+I will not go over this ground&mdash;I want
+to tell you that I do not understand
+you. You say that you have not given
+up all thoughts of returning here&mdash;and
+I know that it will be necessary&mdash;nay,
+is. I cannot explain myself; but if you
+have not lost your memory, you will
+easily divine my meaning. What! is
+our life then only to be made up of separations?
+and am I only to return to
+a country, that has not merely lost all
+charms for me, but for which I feel a
+repugnance that almost amounts to
+horror, only to be left there a prey to
+it!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-113" id="CPg_3-113"></a>[<a href="images/v3-113.png">113</a>]</span>
+Why is it so necessary that I should
+return?&mdash;brought up here, my girl
+would be freer. Indeed, expecting you
+to join us, I had formed some plans
+of usefulness that have now vanished
+with my hopes of happiness.</p>
+
+<p>In the bitterness of my heart, I could
+complain with reason, that I am left
+here dependent on a man, whose avidity
+to acquire a fortune has rendered
+him callous to every sentiment connected
+with social or affectionate emotions.&mdash;With
+a brutal insensibility, he
+cannot help displaying the pleasure
+your determination to stay gives him,
+in spite of the effect it is visible it has
+had on me.</p>
+
+<p>Till I can earn money, I shall endeavour
+to borrow some, for I want to
+avoid asking him continually for the
+sum necessary to maintain me.&mdash;Do not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-114" id="CPg_3-114"></a>[<a href="images/v3-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+mistake me, I have never been refused.&mdash;Yet
+I have gone half a dozen times
+to the house to ask for it, and come
+away without speaking&mdash;&mdash;you must
+guess why&mdash;Besides, I wish to avoid
+hearing of the eternal projects to which
+you have sacrificed my peace&mdash;not remembering&mdash;but
+I will be silent for
+ever.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">April 7.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Here</span> I am at H&mdash;&mdash;, on the wing
+towards you, and I write now, only to
+tell you, that you may expect me in
+the course of three or four days; for<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-115" id="CPg_3-115"></a>[<a href="images/v3-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+I shall not attempt to give vent to the
+different emotions which agitate my
+heart&mdash;You may term a feeling, which
+appears to me to be a degree of delicacy
+that naturally arises from sensibility,
+pride&mdash;Still I cannot indulge the
+very affectionate tenderness which
+glows in my bosom, without trembling,
+till I see, by your eyes, that it is mutual.</p>
+
+<p>I sit, lost in thought, looking at the
+sea&mdash;and tears rush into my eyes, when
+I find that I am cherishing any fond
+expectations.&mdash;I have indeed been so
+unhappy this winter, I find it as difficult
+to acquire fresh hopes, as to regain
+tranquillity.&mdash;Enough of this&mdash;lie
+still, foolish heart!&mdash;But for the little
+girl, I could almost wish that it
+should cease to beat, to be no more
+alive to the anguish of disappointment.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-116" id="CPg_3-116"></a>[<a href="images/v3-116.png">116</a>]</span>
+Sweet little creature! I deprived myself
+of my only pleasure, when I weaned
+her, about ten days ago.&mdash;I am however
+glad I conquered my repugnance.&mdash;It
+was necessary it should be done
+soon, and I did not wish to embitter
+the renewal of your acquaintance with
+her, by putting it off till we met.&mdash;It
+was a painful exertion to me, and I
+thought it best to throw this inquietude
+with the rest, into the sack that I
+would fain throw over my shoulder.&mdash;I
+wished to endure it alone, in short&mdash;Yet,
+after sending her to sleep in the
+next room for three or four nights, you
+cannot think with what joy I took her
+back again to sleep in my bosom!</p>
+
+<p>I suppose I shall find you, when I arrive,
+for I do not see any necessity for
+your coming to me.&mdash;Pray inform Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;,
+that I have his little friend<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-117" id="CPg_3-117"></a>[<a href="images/v3-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+with me.&mdash;My wishing to oblige him,
+made me put myself to some inconvenience&mdash;&mdash;and
+delay my departure;
+which was irksome to me, who have
+not quite as much philosophy, I would
+not for the world say indifference, as
+you. God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Brighthelmstone, Saturday, April 11.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Here</span> we are, my love, and mean to
+set out early in the morning; and, if I
+can find you, I hope to dine with you
+to-morrow.&mdash;I shall drive to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+hotel, where &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; tells me you have<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-118" id="CPg_3-118"></a>[<a href="images/v3-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+been&mdash;and, if you have left it, I hope you
+will take care to be there to receive us.</p>
+
+<p>I have brought with me Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s
+little friend, and a girl whom I like to
+take care of our little darling&mdash;not on the
+way, for that fell to my share.&mdash;But why
+do I write about trifles?&mdash;or any thing?&mdash;Are
+we not to meet soon?&mdash;What
+does your heart say!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I have weaned my &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and she
+is now eating away at the white bread.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-119" id="CPg_3-119"></a>[<a href="images/v3-119.png">119</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XL</h4>
+
+<p class="right">London, Friday, May 22.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just received your affectionate
+letter, and am distressed to think that I
+have added to your embarrassments at
+this troublesome juncture, when the
+exertion of all the faculties of your mind
+appears to be necessary, to extricate
+you out of your pecuniary difficulties.
+I suppose it was something relative to
+the circumstance you have mentioned,
+which made &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; request to see me
+to-day, to <i>converse about a matter of great
+importance</i>. Be that as it may, his letter
+(such is the state of my spirits) inconceivably
+alarmed me, and rendered<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-120" id="CPg_3-120"></a>[<a href="images/v3-120.png">120</a>]</span>
+the last night as distressing, as the two
+former had been.</p>
+
+<p>I have laboured to calm my mind since
+you left me&mdash;Still I find that tranquillity
+is not to be obtained by exertion; it
+is a feeling so different from the resignation
+of despair!&mdash;I am however no
+longer angry with you&mdash;nor will I ever
+utter another complaint&mdash;there are
+arguments which convince the reason,
+whilst they carry death to the heart.&mdash;We
+have had too many cruel <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'explananations'">explanations</ins>,
+that not only cloud every future
+prospect; but embitter the remembrances
+which alone give life to
+affection.&mdash;Let the subject never be
+revived!</p>
+
+<p>It seems to me that I have not only
+lost the hope, but the power of being
+happy.&mdash;Every emotion is now sharp<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-121" id="CPg_3-121"></a>[<a href="images/v3-121.png">121</a>]</span>ened
+by anguish.&mdash;My soul has been
+shook, and my tone of feelings destroyed.&mdash;I
+have gone out&mdash;and sought
+for dissipation, if not amusement, merely
+to fatigue still more, I find, my irritable
+nerves&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>My friend&mdash;my dear friend&mdash;examine
+yourself well&mdash;I am out of the
+question; for, alas! I am nothing&mdash;and
+discover what you wish to do&mdash;what
+will render you most comfortable&mdash;or,
+to be more explicit&mdash;whether
+you desire to live with me, or part for
+ever? When you can once ascertain it,
+tell me frankly, I conjure you!&mdash;for, believe
+me, I have very involuntarily interrupted
+your peace.</p>
+
+<p>I shall expect you to dinner on Monday,
+and will endeavour to assume a
+cheerful face to greet you&mdash;at any<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-122" id="CPg_3-122"></a>[<a href="images/v3-122.png">122</a>]</span>
+rate I will avoid conversations, which
+only tend to harrass your feelings, because
+I am most affectionately yours,</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I inclose</span> you the letter, which you
+desired me to forward, and I am tempted
+very laconically to wish you a good
+morning&mdash;not because I am angry, or
+have nothing to say; but to keep down
+a wounded spirit.&mdash;I shall make every
+effort to calm my mind&mdash;yet a strong
+conviction seems to whirl round in the
+very centre of my brain, which, like<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-123" id="CPg_3-123"></a>[<a href="images/v3-123.png">123</a>]</span>
+the fiat of fate, emphatically assures
+me, that grief has a firm hold of my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">&mdash;, Wednesday, Two o'Clock.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">We</span> arrived here about an hour ago.
+I am extremely fatigued with the child,
+who would not rest quiet with any
+body but me, during the night&mdash;and
+now we are here in a comfortless,
+damp room, in a sort of a tomb-like
+house. This however I shall quickly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-124" id="CPg_3-124"></a>[<a href="images/v3-124.png">124</a>]</span>
+remedy, for, when I have finished this
+letter, (which I must do immediately,
+because the post goes out early), I
+shall sally forth, and enquire about a
+vessel and an inn.</p>
+
+<p>I will not distress you by talking of
+the depression of my spirits, or the
+struggle I had to keep alive my dying
+heart.&mdash;It is even now too full to allow
+me to write with composure.&mdash;*****,&mdash;dear
+*****, &mdash;am I always to be
+tossed about thus?&mdash;shall I never find
+an asylum to rest <i>contented</i> in? How
+can you love to fly about continually&mdash;dropping
+down, as it were, in a new
+world&mdash;cold and strange!&mdash;every other
+day? Why do you not attach those
+tender emotions round the idea of home,
+which even now dim my eyes?&mdash;This
+alone is affection&mdash;every thing else is
+only humanity, electrified by sympathy.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-125" id="CPg_3-125"></a>[<a href="images/v3-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+I will write to you again to-morrow,
+when I know how long I am to be detained&mdash;and
+hope to get a letter quickly
+from you, to cheer yours sincerely
+and affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; is playing near me in high
+spirits. She was so pleased with the
+noise of the mail-horn, she has been
+continually imitating it.&mdash;&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thursday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">A lady</span> has just sent to offer to
+take me to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. I have then only
+a moment to exclaim against the vague<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-126" id="CPg_3-126"></a>[<a href="images/v3-126.png">126</a>]</span>
+manner in which people give information</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>But why talk of inconveniences, which
+are in fact trifling, when compared
+with the sinking of the heart I have
+felt! I did not intend to touch this
+painful string&mdash;God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-127" id="CPg_3-127"></a>[<a href="images/v3-127.png">127</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday, June 12.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just received yours dated the
+9th, which I suppose was a mistake, for
+it could scarcely have loitered so long
+on the road. The general observations
+which apply to the state of your own
+mind, appear to me just, as far as they
+go; and I shall always consider it as
+one of the most serious misfortunes of
+my life, that I did not meet you, before
+satiety had rendered your senses so fastidious,
+as almost to close up every tender
+avenue of sentiment and affection
+that leads to your sympathetic heart.
+You have a heart, my friend, yet, hurried
+away by the impetuosity of inferior
+feelings, you have sought in vulgar<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-128" id="CPg_3-128"></a>[<a href="images/v3-128.png">128</a>]</span>
+excesses, for that gratification which
+only the heart can bestow.</p>
+
+<p>The common run of men, I know,
+with strong health and gross appetites,
+must have variety to banish <i>ennui</i>, because
+the imagination never lends its
+magic wand, to convert appetite into
+love, cemented by according reason.&mdash;Ah!
+my friend, you know not the ineffable
+delight, the exquisite pleasure,
+which arises from a unison of affection
+and desire, when the whole soul and
+senses are abandoned to a lively imagination,
+that renders every emotion delicate
+and rapturous. Yes; these are
+emotions, over which satiety has no
+power, and the recollection of which,
+even disappointment cannot disenchant;
+but they do not exist without self-denial.
+These emotions, more or less
+strong, appear to me to be the distinc<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-129" id="CPg_3-129"></a>[<a href="images/v3-129.png">129</a>]</span>tive
+characteristic of genius, the foundation
+of taste, and of that exquisite
+relish for the beauties of nature, of
+which the common herd of eaters and
+drinkers and <i>child-begeters</i>, certainly
+have no idea. You will smile at an
+observation that has just occurred to me:&mdash;I
+consider those minds as the most
+strong and original, whose imagination
+acts as the stimulus to their senses.</p>
+
+<p>Well! you will ask, what is the result
+of all this reasoning? Why I cannot
+help thinking that it is possible for
+you, having great strength of mind,
+to return to nature, and regain a sanity
+of constitution, and purity of feeling&mdash;which
+would open your heart to me.&mdash;I
+would fain rest there!</p>
+
+<p>Yet, convinced more than ever of
+the sincerity and tenderness of my attachment
+to you, the involuntary hopes,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-130" id="CPg_3-130"></a>[<a href="images/v3-130.png">130</a>]</span>
+which a determination to live has revived,
+are not sufficiently strong to dissipate
+the cloud, that despair has spread
+over futurity. I have looked at the
+sea, and at my child, hardly daring to
+own to myself the secret wish, that it
+might become our tomb; and that the
+heart, still so alive to anguish, might
+there be quieted by death. At this
+moment ten thousand complicated sentiments
+press for utterance, weigh on
+my heart, and obscure my sight.</p>
+
+<p>Are we ever to meet again? and will
+you endeavour to render that meeting
+happier than the last? Will you endeavour
+to restrain your caprices, in order
+to give vigour to affection, and to give
+play to the checked sentiments that
+nature intended should expand your
+heart? I cannot indeed, without agony,
+think of your bosom's being conti<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-131" id="CPg_3-131"></a>[<a href="images/v3-131.png">131</a>]</span>nually
+contaminated; and bitter are
+the tears which exhaust my eyes, when
+I recollect why my child and I are
+forced to stray from the asylum, in
+which, after so many storms, I had
+hoped to rest, smiling at angry fate.&mdash;These
+are not common sorrows; nor
+can you perhaps conceive, how much
+active fortitude it requires to labour
+perpetually to blunt the shafts of disappointment.</p>
+
+<p>Examine now yourself, and ascertain
+whether you can live in something-like
+a settled stile. Let our confidence
+in future be unbounded; consider whether
+you find it necessary to sacrifice
+me to what you term "the zest of life;"
+and, when you have once a clear view
+of your own motives, of your own incentive
+to action, do not deceive me!</p>
+
+<p>The train of thoughts which the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-132" id="CPg_3-132"></a>[<a href="images/v3-132.png">132</a>]</span>
+writing of this epistle awoke, makes
+me so wretched, that I must take a
+walk, to rouse and calm my mind.
+But first, let me tell you, that, if you
+really wish to promote my happiness,
+you will endeavour to give me as much
+as you can of yourself. You have great
+mental energy; and your judgment
+seems to me so just, that it is only the
+dupe of your inclination in discussing
+one subject.</p>
+
+<p>The post does not go out to-day.
+To-morrow I may write more tranquilly.
+I cannot yet say when the vessel
+will sail in which I have determined
+to depart.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Morning.</p>
+
+<p>Your second letter reached me about
+an hour ago. You were certainly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-133" id="CPg_3-133"></a>[<a href="images/v3-133.png">133</a>]</span>
+wrong, in supposing that I did not mention
+you with respect; though, without
+my being conscious of it, some sparks
+of resentment may have animated the
+gloom of despair&mdash;Yes; with less affection,
+I should have been more respectful.
+However the regard which I
+have for you, is so unequivocal to myself,
+I imagine that it must be sufficiently
+obvious to every body else. Besides,
+the only letter I intended for the
+public eye was to &mdash;&mdash;, and that I destroyed
+from delicacy before you saw
+them, because it was only written (of
+course warmly in your praise) to prevent
+any odium being thrown on you<a name="FNanchor_133-A_20" id="CFNanchor_133-A_20"></a><a href="#CFootnote_133-A_20" class="fnanchor">[133-A]</a>.</p>
+
+<p>I am harrassed by your embarrassments,
+and shall certainly use all my<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-134" id="CPg_3-134"></a>[<a href="images/v3-134.png">134</a>]</span>
+efforts, to make the business terminate
+to your satisfaction in which I am engaged.</p>
+
+<p>My friend&mdash;my dearest friend&mdash;I feel
+my fate united to yours by the most sacred
+principles of my soul, and the
+yearns of&mdash;yes, I will say it&mdash;a true,
+unsophisticated heart.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours most truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>If the wind be fair, the captain
+talks of sailing on Monday; but I am
+afraid I shall be detained some days
+longer. At any rate, continue to write,
+(I want this support) till you are sure
+I am where I cannot expect a letter;
+and, if any should arrive after my departure,
+a gentleman (not Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s
+friend, I promise you) from whom I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-135" id="CPg_3-135"></a>[<a href="images/v3-135.png">135</a>]</span>
+have received great civilities, will send
+them after me.</p>
+
+<p>Do write by every occasion! I am
+anxious to hear how your affairs go on;
+and, still more, to be convinced that you
+are not separating yourself from us.
+For my little darling is calling papa,
+and adding her parrot word&mdash;Come,
+Come! And will you not come, and
+let us exert ourselves?&mdash;I shall recover
+all my energy, when I am convinced
+that my exertions will draw us more
+closely together. One more adieu!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-136" id="CPg_3-136"></a>[<a href="images/v3-136.png">136</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday, June 14.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I rather</span> expected to hear from you
+to-day&mdash;I wish you would not fail to
+write to me for a little time, because I
+am not quite well&mdash;Whether I have any
+good sleep or not, I wake in the morning
+in violent fits of trembling&mdash;and,
+in spite of all my efforts, the child&mdash;every
+thing&mdash;fatigues me, in which I
+seek for solace or amusement.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. &mdash;&mdash; forced on me a letter to a
+physician of this place; it was fortunate,
+for I should otherwise have had some
+difficulty to obtain the necessary information.
+His wife is a pretty woman
+(I can admire, you know, a pretty wo<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-137" id="CPg_3-137"></a>[<a href="images/v3-137.png">137</a>]</span>man,
+when I am alone) and he an intelligent
+and rather interesting man.&mdash;They
+have behaved to me with great
+hospitality; and poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; was never
+so happy in her life, as amongst their
+young brood.</p>
+
+<p>They took me in their carriage to
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and I ran over my favourite
+walks, with a vivacity that would have
+astonished you.&mdash;The town did not
+please me quite so well as formerly&mdash;It
+appeared so diminutive; and, when
+I found that many of the inhabitants
+had lived in the same houses ever since
+I left it, I could not help wondering
+how they could thus have vegetated,
+whilst I was running over a world of
+sorrow, snatching at pleasure, and
+throwing off prejudices. The place
+where I at present am, is much improved;
+but it is astonishing what<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-138" id="CPg_3-138"></a>[<a href="images/v3-138.png">138</a>]</span>
+strides aristocracy and fanaticism have
+made, since I resided in this country.</p>
+
+<p>The wind does not appear inclined
+to change, so I am still forced to linger&mdash;When
+do you think that you shall
+be able to set out for France? I do
+not entirely like the aspect of your affairs,
+and still less your connections on
+either side of the water. Often do I
+sigh, when I think of your entanglements
+in business, and your extreme
+restlessness of mind.&mdash;Even now I am
+almost afraid to ask you, whether the
+pleasure of being free, does not over-balance
+the pain you felt at parting
+with me? Sometimes I indulge the
+hope that you will feel me necessary to
+you&mdash;or why should we meet again?&mdash;but,
+the moment after, despair damps
+my rising spirits, aggravated by the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-139" id="CPg_3-139"></a>[<a href="images/v3-139.png">139</a>]</span>
+emotions of tenderness, which ought
+to soften the cares of life.&mdash;&mdash;God
+bless you!</p>
+
+<p>Yours sincerely and affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">June 15.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I want</span> to know how you have
+settled with respect to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. In
+short, be very particular in your account
+of all your affairs&mdash;let our confidence,
+my dear, be unbounded.&mdash;The
+last time we were separated, was
+a separation indeed on your part&mdash;Now
+you have acted more ingenuously<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-140" id="CPg_3-140"></a>[<a href="images/v3-140.png">140</a>]</span>,
+let the most affectionate interchange of
+sentiments fill up the aching void of
+disappointment. I almost dread that
+your plans will prove abortive&mdash;yet
+should the most unlucky turn send
+you home to us, convinced that a true
+friend is a treasure, I should not much
+mind having to struggle with the world
+again. Accuse me not of pride&mdash;yet
+sometimes, when nature has opened
+my heart to its author, I have wondered
+that you did not set a higher value on
+my heart.</p>
+
+<p>Receive a kiss from &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, I was
+going to add, if you will not take one
+from me, and believe me yours</p>
+
+<p class="right">Sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>The wind still continues in the same
+quarter.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-141" id="CPg_3-141"></a>[<a href="images/v3-141.png">141</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tuesday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> captain has just sent to inform
+me, that I must be on board in the course
+of a few hours.&mdash;I wished to have
+stayed till to-morrow. It would have
+been a comfort to me to have received
+another letter from you&mdash;Should one
+arrive, it will be sent after me.</p>
+
+<p>My spirits are agitated, I scarcely
+know why&mdash;&mdash;The quitting England
+seems to be a fresh parting.&mdash;Surely
+you will not forget me.&mdash;A thousand
+weak forebodings assault my soul, and
+the state of my health renders me sensible
+to every thing. It is surprising
+that in London, in a continual con<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-142" id="CPg_3-142"></a>[<a href="images/v3-142.png">142</a>]</span>flict
+of mind, I was still growing better&mdash;whilst
+here, bowed down by the
+despotic hand of fate, forced into resignation
+by despair, I seem to be fading
+away&mdash;perishing beneath a cruel
+blight, that withers up all my faculties.</p>
+
+<p>The child is perfectly well. My
+hand seems unwilling to add adieu! I
+know not why this inexpressible sadness
+has taken possession of me.&mdash;It is
+not a presentiment of ill. Yet, having
+been so perpetually the sport of disappointment,&mdash;having
+a heart that has
+been as it were a mark for misery, I
+dread to meet wretchedness in some
+new shape.&mdash;Well, let it come&mdash;I care
+not!&mdash;what have I to dread, who have
+so little to hope for! God bless you&mdash;I
+am most affectionately and sincerely
+yours</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-143" id="CPg_3-143"></a>[<a href="images/v3-143.png">143</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I was</span> hurried on board yesterday
+about three o'clock, the wind having
+changed. But before evening it veered
+round to the old point; and here we
+are, in the midst of mists and water,
+only taking advantage of the tide to advance
+a few miles.</p>
+
+<p>You will scarcely suppose that I left
+the town with reluctance&mdash;yet it was
+even so&mdash;for I wished to receive another
+letter from you, and I felt pain
+at parting, for ever perhaps, from the
+amiable family, who had treated me with
+so much hospitality and kindness. They
+will probably send me your letter, if it<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-144" id="CPg_3-144"></a>[<a href="images/v3-144.png">144</a>]</span>
+arrives this morning; for here we are
+likely to remain, I am afraid to think
+how long.</p>
+
+<p>The vessel is very commodious, and
+the captain a civil, open-hearted kind
+of man. There being no other passengers,
+I have the cabin to myself,
+which is pleasant; and I have brought
+a few books with me to beguile weariness;
+but I seem inclined, rather to
+employ the dead moments of suspence
+in writing some effusions, than in reading.</p>
+
+<p>What are you about? How are
+your affairs going on? It may be a
+long time before you answer these
+questions. My dear friend, my heart
+sinks within me!&mdash;Why am I forced
+thus to struggle continually with my
+affections and feelings?&mdash;Ah! why are
+those affections and feelings the source<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-145" id="CPg_3-145"></a>[<a href="images/v3-145.png">145</a>]</span>
+of so much misery, when they seem to
+have been given to vivify my heart, and
+extend my usefulness! But I must not
+dwell on this subject.&mdash;Will you not
+endeavour to cherish all the affection
+you can for me? What am I saying?&mdash;Rather
+forget me, if you can&mdash;if
+other gratifications are dearer to you.&mdash;How
+is every remembrance of mine
+embittered by disappointment? What a
+world is this!&mdash;They only seem happy,
+who never look beyond sensual or artificial
+enjoyments.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; begins to play with the
+cabin-boy, and is as gay as a lark.&mdash;I
+will labour to be tranquil; and am in
+every mood,</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-146" id="CPg_3-146"></a>[<a href="images/v3-146.png">146</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thursday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Here</span> I am still&mdash;and I have just received
+your letter of Monday by the
+pilot, who promised to bring it to me,
+if we were detained, as he expected,
+by the wind.&mdash;It is indeed wearisome
+to be thus tossed about without going
+forward.&mdash;I have a violent head-ache&mdash;yet
+I am obliged to take care of
+the child, who is a little tormented
+by her teeth, because &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; is unable
+to do any thing, she is rendered
+so sick by the motion of the ship, as
+we ride at anchor.</p>
+
+<p>These are however trifling inconveniences,
+compared with anguish of
+mind&mdash;compared with the sinking of a<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-147" id="CPg_3-147"></a>[<a href="images/v3-147.png">147</a>]</span>
+broken heart.&mdash;To tell you the truth, I
+never suffered in my life so much from
+depression of spirits&mdash;from despair.&mdash;I
+do not sleep&mdash;or, if I close my eyes, it
+is to have the most terrifying dreams, in
+which I often meet you with different
+casts of countenance.</p>
+
+<p>I will not, my dear &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, torment
+you by dwelling on my sufferings&mdash;and
+will use all my efforts to calm my mind,
+instead of deadening it&mdash;at present it is
+most painfully active. I find I am not
+equal to these continual struggles&mdash;yet
+your letter this morning has afforded
+me some comfort&mdash;and I will try to revive
+hope. One thing let me tell you&mdash;when
+we meet again&mdash;surely we are to
+meet!&mdash;it must be to part no more. I
+mean not to have seas between us&mdash;it
+is more than I can support.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-148" id="CPg_3-148"></a>[<a href="images/v3-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+The pilot is hurrying me&mdash;God bless
+you.</p>
+
+<p>In spite of the commodiousness of
+the vessel, every thing here would disgust
+my senses, had I nothing else to
+think of&mdash;"When the mind's free, the
+body's delicate;"&mdash;mine has been too
+much hurt to regard trifles.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours most truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER L</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> is the fifth dreary day I have
+been imprisoned by the wind, with
+every outward object to disgust the
+senses, and unable to banish the remembrances
+that sadden my heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-149" id="CPg_3-149"></a>[<a href="images/v3-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+How am I altered by disappointment!&mdash;When
+going to &mdash;&mdash;, ten years
+ago, the elasticity of my mind was
+sufficient to ward off weariness&mdash;and
+the imagination still could dip her
+brush in the rainbow of fancy, and
+sketch futurity in smiling colours. Now
+I am going towards the North in
+search of sunbeams!&mdash;Will any ever
+warm this desolated heart? All nature
+seems to frown&mdash;or rather mourn with
+me.&mdash;Every thing is cold&mdash;cold as my
+expectations! Before I left the shore,
+tormented, as I now am, by these
+North east <i>chillers</i>, I could not help
+exclaiming&mdash;Give me, gracious Heaven!
+at least, genial weather, if I am
+never to meet the genial affection that
+still warms this agitated bosom&mdash;compelling
+life to linger there.</p>
+
+<p>I am now going on shore with the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-150" id="CPg_3-150"></a>[<a href="images/v3-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+captain, though the weather be rough,
+to seek for milk, &amp;c. at a little village,
+and to take a walk&mdash;after which I hope
+to sleep&mdash;for, confined here, surrounded
+by disagreeable smells, I have lost
+the little appetite I had; and I lie
+awake, till thinking almost drives me
+to the brink of madness&mdash;only to the
+brink, for I never forget, even in the
+feverish slumbers I sometimes fall into,
+the misery I am labouring to blunt the
+the sense of, by every exertion in my
+power.</p>
+
+<p>Poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; still continues sick,
+and &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; grows weary when the
+weather will not allow her to remain
+on deck.</p>
+
+<p>I hope this will be the last letter I shall
+write from England to you&mdash;are you
+not tired of this lingering adieu?</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-151" id="CPg_3-151"></a>[<a href="images/v3-151.png">151</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> captain last night, after I had
+written my letter to you intended to
+be left at a little village, offered to go
+to &mdash;&mdash; to pass to-day. We had a
+troublesome sail&mdash;and now I must hurry
+on board again, for the wind has
+changed.</p>
+
+<p>I half expected to find a letter from
+you here. Had you written one haphazard,
+it would have been kind and
+considerate&mdash;you might have known,
+had you thought, that the wind would
+not permit me to depart. These are
+attentions, more grateful to the heart<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-152" id="CPg_3-152"></a>[<a href="images/v3-152.png">152</a>]</span>
+than offers of service&mdash;But why do I
+foolishly continue to look for them?</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! adieu! My friend&mdash;your
+friendship is very cold&mdash;you see I am
+hurt.&mdash;God bless you! I may perhaps
+be, some time or other, independent in
+every sense of the word&mdash;Ah! there
+is but one sense of it of consequence.
+I will break or bend this weak heart&mdash;yet
+even now it is full.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>The child is well; I did not leave
+her on board.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-153" id="CPg_3-153"></a>[<a href="images/v3-153.png">153</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">June 27, Saturday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I arrived</span> in &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; this afternoon,
+after vainly attempting to land
+at &mdash;&mdash;. I have now but a moment,
+before the post goes out, to inform you
+we have got here; though not without
+considerable difficulty, for we were set
+ashore in a boat above twenty miles
+below.</p>
+
+<p>What I suffered in the vessel I will
+not now descant upon&mdash;nor mention
+the pleasure I received from the sight
+of the rocky coast.&mdash;This morning
+however, walking to join the carriage
+that was to transport us to this place,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-154" id="CPg_3-154"></a>[<a href="images/v3-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+I fell, without any previous warning,
+senseless on the rocks&mdash;and how I
+escaped with life I can scarcely guess.
+I was in a stupour for a quarter of an
+hour; the suffusion of blood at last restored
+me to my senses&mdash;the contusion
+is great, and my brain confused. The
+child is well.</p>
+
+<p>Twenty miles ride in the rain, after
+my accident, has sufficiently deranged
+me&mdash;and here I could not get a fire to
+warm me, or any thing warm to eat;
+the inns are mere stables&mdash;I must nevertheless
+go to bed. For God's sake, let
+me hear from you immediately, my
+friend! I am not well and yet you
+see I cannot die.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-155" id="CPg_3-155"></a>[<a href="images/v3-155.png">155</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">June 29.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wrote</span> to you by the last post, to
+inform you of my arrival; and I believe
+I alluded to the extreme fatigue I endured
+on ship-board, owing to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+illness, and the roughness of the weather&mdash;I
+likewise mentioned to you my
+fall, the effects of which I still feel,
+though I do not think it will have any
+serious consequences.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; will go with me, if I find it
+necessary to go to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. The inns
+here are so bad, I was forced to accept
+of an apartment in his house. I am
+overwhelmed with civilities on all sides,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-156" id="CPg_3-156"></a>[<a href="images/v3-156.png">156</a>]</span>
+and fatigued with the endeavours to
+amuse me, from which I cannot escape.</p>
+
+<p>My friend&mdash;my friend, I am not
+well&mdash;a deadly weight of sorrow lies
+heavily on my heart. I am again tossed
+on the troubled billows of life; and
+obliged to cope with difficulties, without
+being buoyed up by the hopes that
+alone render them bearable. "How flat,
+dull, and unprofitable," appears to me
+all the bustle into which I see people
+here so eagerly enter! I long every
+night to go to bed, to hide my melancholy
+face in my pillow; but there is
+a canker-worm in my bosom that never
+sleeps.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-157" id="CPg_3-157"></a>[<a href="images/v3-157.png">157</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 1.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I labour</span> in vain to calm my mind&mdash;my
+soul has been overwhelmed by sorrow
+and disappointment. Every thing
+fatigues me&mdash;this is a life that cannot
+last long. It is you who must determine
+with respect to futurity&mdash;and,
+when you have, I will act accordingly&mdash;I
+mean, we must either resolve to live
+together, or part for ever, I cannot
+bear these continual struggles&mdash;But I
+wish you to examine carefully your own
+heart and mind; and, if you perceive
+the least chance of being happier without
+me than with me, or if your incli<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-158" id="CPg_3-158"></a>[<a href="images/v3-158.png">158</a>]</span>nation
+leans capriciously to that side,
+do not dissemble; but tell me frankly
+that you will never see me more. I
+will then adopt the plan I mentioned
+to you&mdash;for we must either live together,
+or I will be entirely independent.</p>
+
+<p>My heart is so oppressed, I cannot
+write with precision&mdash;You know however
+that what I so imperfectly express,
+are not the crude sentiments of the
+moment&mdash;You can only contribute to
+my comfort (it is the consolation I am
+in need of) by being with me&mdash;and, if
+the tenderest friendship is of any value,
+why will you not look to me for a degree
+of satisfaction that heartless affections
+cannot bestow?</p>
+
+<p>Tell me then, will you determine to
+meet me at Basle?&mdash;I shall, I should
+imagine, be at &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; before the close
+of August; and, after you settle your<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-159" id="CPg_3-159"></a>[<a href="images/v3-159.png">159</a>]</span>
+affairs at Paris, could we not meet
+there?</p>
+
+<p>God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>Poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has suffered during the
+journey with her teeth.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 3.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">There</span> was a gloominess diffused
+through your last letter, the impression
+of which still rests on my mind&mdash;though,
+recollecting how quickly you throw off
+the forcible feelings of the moment, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-160" id="CPg_3-160"></a>[<a href="images/v3-160.png">160</a>]</span>
+flatter myself it has long since given
+place to your usual cheerfulness.</p>
+
+<p>Believe me (and my eyes fill with
+tears of tenderness as I assure you)
+there is nothing I would not endure in
+the way of privation, rather than disturb
+your tranquillity.&mdash;If I am fated
+to be unhappy, I will labour to hide
+my sorrows in my own bosom; and you
+shall always find me a faithful, affectionate
+friend.</p>
+
+<p>I grow more and more attached to
+my little girl&mdash;and I cherish this affection
+without fear, because it must be
+a long time before it can become bitterness
+of soul.&mdash;She is an interesting
+creature.&mdash;On ship-board, how often
+as I gazed at the sea, have I longed to
+bury my troubled bosom in the less
+troubled deep; asserting with Brutus,
+"that the virtue I had followed too<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-161" id="CPg_3-161"></a>[<a href="images/v3-161.png">161</a>]</span>
+far, was merely an empty name!" and
+nothing but the sight of her&mdash;her playful
+smiles, which seemed to cling and
+twine round my heart&mdash;could have
+stopped me.</p>
+
+<p>What peculiar misery has fallen to
+my share! To act up to my principles,
+I have laid the strictest restraint
+on my very thoughts&mdash;yes; not to
+sully the delicacy of my feelings, I have
+reined in my imagination; and started
+with affright from every sensation,
+(I allude to &mdash;&mdash;) that stealing with
+balmy sweetness into my soul, led me
+to scent from afar the fragrance of reviving
+nature.</p>
+
+<p>My friend, I have dearly paid for
+one conviction.&mdash;Love, in some minds,
+is an affair of sentiment, arising from
+the same delicacy of perception (or
+taste) as renders them alive to the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-162" id="CPg_3-162"></a>[<a href="images/v3-162.png">162</a>]</span>
+beauties of nature, poetry, &amp;c., alive
+to the charms of those evanescent graces
+that are, as it were, impalpable&mdash;they
+must be felt, they cannot be described.</p>
+
+<p>Love is a want of my heart. I have
+examined myself lately with more care
+than formerly, and find, that to deaden
+is not to calm the mind&mdash;Aiming at
+tranquillity, I have almost destroyed all
+the energy of my soul&mdash;almost rooted
+out what renders it estimable&mdash;Yes, I
+have damped that enthusiasm of character,
+which converts the grossest
+materials into a fuel, that imperceptibly
+feeds hopes, which aspire above
+common enjoyment. Despair, since
+the birth of my child, has rendered me
+stupid&mdash;soul and body seemed to be
+fading away before the withering touch
+of disappointment.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-163" id="CPg_3-163"></a>[<a href="images/v3-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+I am now endeavouring to recover
+myself&mdash;and such is the elasticity of my
+constitution, and the purity of the atmosphere
+here, that health unsought
+for, begins to reanimate my countenance.</p>
+
+<p>I have the sincerest esteem and affection
+for you&mdash;but the desire of regaining
+peace, (do you understand me?)
+has made me forget the respect due to
+my own emotions&mdash;sacred emotions,
+that are the sure harbingers of the delights
+I was formed to enjoy&mdash;and
+shall enjoy, for nothing can extinguish
+the heavenly spark.</p>
+
+<p>Still, when we meet again, I will
+not torment you, I promise you. I
+blush when I recollect my former conduct&mdash;and
+will not in future confound
+myself with the beings whom I feel to<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-164" id="CPg_3-164"></a>[<a href="images/v3-164.png">164</a>]</span>
+be my inferiors.&mdash;I will listen to delicacy,
+or pride.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 4.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I hope</span> to hear from you by to-morrow's
+mail. My dearest friend! I cannot
+tear my affections from you&mdash;and,
+though every remembrance stings me
+to the soul, I think of you, till I make
+allowance for the very defects of character,
+that have given such a cruel stab
+to my peace.</p>
+
+<p>Still however I am more alive, than
+you have seen me for a long, long time.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-165" id="CPg_3-165"></a>[<a href="images/v3-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+I have a degree of vivacity, even in my
+grief, which is preferable to the benumbing
+stupour that, for the last year,
+has frozen up all my faculties.&mdash;Perhaps
+this change is more owing to returning
+health, than to the vigour of
+my reason&mdash;for, in spite of sadness (and
+surely I have had my share), the purity
+of this air, and the being continually
+out in it, for I sleep in the country every
+night, has made an alteration in my
+appearance that really surprises me.&mdash;The
+rosy fingers of health already streak
+my cheeks&mdash;and I have seen a <i>physical</i>
+life in my eyes, after I have been climbing
+the rocks, that resembled the fond,
+credulous hopes of youth.</p>
+
+<p>With what a cruel sigh have I recollected
+that I had forgotten to hope!&mdash;Reason,
+or rather experience, does not
+thus cruelly damp poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s plea<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-166" id="CPg_3-166"></a>[<a href="images/v3-166.png">166</a>]</span>sures;
+she plays all day in the garden
+with &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s children, and makes
+friends for herself.</p>
+
+<p>Do not tell me, that you are happier
+without us&mdash;Will you not come to us in
+Switzerland? Ah, why do not you
+love us with more sentiment?&mdash;why
+are you a creature of such sympathy,
+that the warmth of your feelings, or
+rather quickness of your senses, hardens
+your heart? It is my misfortune,
+that my imagination is perpetually
+shading your defects, and lending you
+charms, whilst the grossness of your
+senses makes you (call me not vain)
+overlook graces in me, that only dignity
+of mind, and the sensibility of an
+expanded heart can give.&mdash;God bless
+you! Adieu.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-167" id="CPg_3-167"></a>[<a href="images/v3-167.png">167</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 7.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I could</span> not help feeling extremely
+mortified last post, at not receiving
+a letter from you. My being at &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+was but a chance, and you might have
+hazarded it; and would a year ago.</p>
+
+<p>I shall not however complain&mdash;There
+are misfortunes so great, as to
+silence the usual expressions of sorrow&mdash;Believe
+me, there is such a thing as a
+broken heart! There are characters
+whose very energy preys upon them;
+and who, ever inclined to cherish by
+reflection some passion, cannot rest satisfied
+with the common comforts of<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-168" id="CPg_3-168"></a>[<a href="images/v3-168.png">168</a>]</span>
+life. I have endeavoured to fly from
+myself, and launched into all the dissipation
+possible here, only to feel keener
+anguish, when alone with my child.</p>
+
+<p>Still, could any thing please me&mdash;had
+not disappointment cut me off
+from life, this romantic country, these
+fine evenings, would interest me.&mdash;My
+God! can any thing? and am I ever
+to feel alive only to painful sensations?&mdash;But
+it cannot&mdash;it shall not last
+long.</p>
+
+<p>The post is again arrived; I have
+sent to seek for letters, only to be
+wounded to the soul by a negative.&mdash;My
+brain seems on fire, I must go into
+the air.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-169" id="CPg_3-169"></a>[<a href="images/v3-169.png">169</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 14.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> now on my journey to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;.
+I felt more at leaving my child, than I
+thought I should&mdash;and, whilst at night
+I imagined every instant that I heard
+the half-formed sounds of her voice,&mdash;I
+asked myself how I could think of
+parting with her for ever, of leaving
+her thus helpless?</p>
+
+<p>Poor lamb! It may run very well
+in a tale, that "God will temper the
+winds to the shorn lamb!" but how
+can I expect that she will be shielded,
+when my naked bosom has had to
+brave continually the pitiless storm?<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-170" id="CPg_3-170"></a>[<a href="images/v3-170.png">170</a>]</span>
+Yes; I could add, with poor Lear&mdash;What
+is the war of elements to the
+pangs of disappointed affection, and
+the horror arising from a discovery of
+a breach of confidence, that snaps every
+social tie!</p>
+
+<p>All is not right somewhere!&mdash;When
+you first knew me, I was not thus lost.
+I could still confide&mdash;for I opened my
+heart to you&mdash;of this only comfort you
+have deprived me, whilst my happiness,
+you tell me, was your first object.
+Strange want of judgment!</p>
+
+<p>I will not complain; but, from the
+soundness of your understanding, I am
+convinced, if you give yourself leave to
+reflect, you will also feel, that your
+conduct to me, so far from being generous,
+has not been just.&mdash;I mean not
+to allude to factitious principles of
+morality; but to the simple basis of all<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-171" id="CPg_3-171"></a>[<a href="images/v3-171.png">171</a>]</span>
+rectitude.&mdash;However I did not intend
+to argue&mdash;Your not writing is cruel&mdash;and
+my reason is perhaps disturbed
+by constant wretchedness.</p>
+
+<p>Poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; would fain have accompanied
+me, out of tenderness; for
+my fainting, or rather convulsion,
+when I landed, and my sudden changes
+of countenance since, have alarmed
+her so much, that she is perpetually
+afraid of some accident&mdash;But it would
+have injured the child this warm season,
+as she is cutting her teeth.</p>
+
+<p>I hear not of your having written to
+me at &mdash;&mdash;. Very well! Act as you
+please&mdash;there is nothing I fear or care
+for! When I see whether I can, or
+cannot obtain the money I am come
+here about, I will not trouble you
+with letters to which you do not reply.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-172" id="CPg_3-172"></a>[<a href="images/v3-172.png">172</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 18.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> here in &mdash;&mdash;, separated
+from my child&mdash;and here I must remain
+a month at least, or I might as well
+never have come.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I have begun &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; which will,
+I hope, discharge all my obligations
+of a pecuniary kind.&mdash;I am lowered in
+my own eyes, on account of my not
+having done it sooner.</p>
+
+<p>I shall make no further comments on
+your silence. God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-173" id="CPg_3-173"></a>[<a href="images/v3-173.png">173</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 30.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just received two of your
+letters, dated the 26th and 30th of June;
+and you must have received several
+from me, informing you of my detention,
+and how much I was hurt by
+your silence.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Write to me then, my friend, and
+write explicitly. I have suffered, God
+knows, since I left you. Ah! you have
+never felt this kind of sickness of heart!&mdash;My
+mind however is at present
+painfully active, and the sympathy I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-174" id="CPg_3-174"></a>[<a href="images/v3-174.png">174</a>]</span>
+feel almost rises to agony. But this is
+not a subject of complaint, it has afforded
+me pleasure,&mdash;and reflected
+pleasure is all I have to hope for&mdash;if a
+spark of hope be yet alive in my forlorn
+bosom.</p>
+
+<p>I will try to write with a degree of
+composure. I wish for us to live together,
+because I want you to acquire an
+habitual tenderness for my poor girl.
+I cannot bear to think of leaving her
+alone in the world, or that she should
+only be protected by your sense of duty.
+Next to preserving her, my most earnest
+wish is not to disturb your peace. I
+have nothing to expect, and little to
+fear, in life&mdash;There are wounds that
+can never be healed&mdash;but they may be
+allowed to fester in silence without
+wincing.</p>
+
+<p>When we meet again, you shall be<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-175" id="CPg_3-175"></a>[<a href="images/v3-175.png">175</a>]</span>
+convinced that I have more resolution
+than you give me credit for. I will not
+torment you. If I am destined always
+to be disappointed and unhappy, I will
+conceal the anguish I cannot dissipate;
+and the tightened cord of life or reason
+will at last snap, and set me free.</p>
+
+<p>Yes; I shall be happy&mdash;This heart is
+worthy of the bliss its feelings anticipate&mdash;and
+I cannot even persuade myself,
+wretched as they have made me,
+that my principles and sentiments are
+not founded in nature and truth. But
+to have done with these subjects.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I have been seriously employed in this
+way since I came to &mdash;&mdash;; yet I never
+was so much in the air.&mdash;I walk, I ride
+on horseback&mdash;row, bathe, and even<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-176" id="CPg_3-176"></a>[<a href="images/v3-176.png">176</a>]</span>
+sleep in the fields; my health is consequently
+improved. The child, &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+informs me, is well. I long to be with
+her.</p>
+
+<p>Write to me immediately&mdash;were I
+only to think of myself, I could wish
+you to return to me, poor, with the simplicity
+of character, part of which you
+seem lately to have lost, that first attached
+to you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours most affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;* * * * *</p>
+
+<p>I have been subscribing other letters&mdash;so
+I mechanically did the same to
+yours.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-177" id="CPg_3-177"></a>[<a href="images/v3-177.png">177</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">August 5.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Employment</span> and exercise have
+been of great service to me; and I have
+entirely recovered the strength and activity
+I lost during the time of my nursing.
+I have seldom been in better
+health; and my mind, though trembling
+to the touch of anguish, is calmer&mdash;yet
+still the same.&mdash;I have, it is true,
+enjoyed some tranquillity, and more happiness
+here, than for a long&mdash;long
+time past.&mdash;(I say happiness, for I can
+give no other appellation to the exquisite
+delight this wild country and fine
+summer have afforded me.)&mdash;Still, on examining
+my heart, I find that it is so<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-178" id="CPg_3-178"></a>[<a href="images/v3-178.png">178</a>]</span>
+constituted, I cannot live without some
+particular affection&mdash;I am afraid not
+without a passion&mdash;and I feel the want
+of it more in society, than in solitude&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Writing to you, whenever an affectionate
+epithet occurs&mdash;my eyes fill
+with tears, and my trembling hand
+stops&mdash;you may then depend on my resolution,
+when with you. If I am
+doomed to be unhappy, I will confine
+my anguish in my own bosom&mdash;tenderness,
+rather than passion, has made me
+sometimes overlook delicacy&mdash;the same
+tenderness will in future restrain me.
+God bless you!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-179" id="CPg_3-179"></a>[<a href="images/v3-179.png">179</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">August 7.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Air</span>, exercise, and bathing, have
+restored me to health, braced my muscles,
+and covered my ribs, even whilst
+I have recovered my former activity.&mdash;I
+cannot tell you that my mind is calm,
+though I have snatched some moments
+of exquisite delight, wandering through
+the woods, and resting on the rocks.</p>
+
+<p>This state of suspense, my friend, is
+intolerable; we must determine on
+something&mdash;and soon;&mdash;we must meet
+shortly, or part for ever. I am sensible
+that I acted foolishly&mdash;but I was
+wretched&mdash;when we were together&mdash;Expecting
+too much, I let the pleasure<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-180" id="CPg_3-180"></a>[<a href="images/v3-180.png">180</a>]</span>
+I might have caught, slip from me. I
+cannot live with you&mdash;I ought not&mdash;if
+you form another attachment. But I
+promise you, mine shall not be intruded
+on you. Little reason have I to expect
+a shadow of happiness, after the cruel
+disappointments that have rent my
+heart; but that of my child seems to
+depend on our being together. Still I
+do not wish you to sacrifice a chance of
+enjoyment for an uncertain good. I
+feel a conviction, that I can provide
+for her, and it shall be my object&mdash;if
+we are indeed to part to meet no more.
+Her affection must not be divided. She
+must be a comfort to me&mdash;if I am to
+have no other&mdash;and only know me as
+her support.&mdash;I feel that I cannot endure
+the anguish of corresponding
+with you&mdash;if we are only to correspond.&mdash;No;
+if you seek for happi<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-181" id="CPg_3-181"></a>[<a href="images/v3-181.png">181</a>]</span>ness
+elsewhere, my letters shall not interrupt
+your repose. I will be dead to
+you. I cannot express to you what
+pain it gives me to write about an eternal
+separation.&mdash;You must determine&mdash;examine
+yourself&mdash;But, for God's sake!
+spare me the anxiety of uncertainty!&mdash;I
+may sink under the trial; but I will
+not complain.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! If I had any thing more to
+say to you, it is all flown, and absorbed
+by the most tormenting apprehensions,
+yet I scarcely know what new form of
+misery I have to dread.</p>
+
+<p>I ought to beg your pardon for having
+sometimes written peevishly; but
+you will impute it to affection, if you
+understand any thing of the heart of</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-182" id="CPg_3-182"></a>[<a href="images/v3-182.png">182</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">August 9.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Five</span> of your letters have been sent
+after me from &mdash;&mdash;. One, dated the
+14th of July, was written in a style
+which I may have merited, but did
+not expect from you. However this
+is not a time to reply to it, except to
+assure you that you shall not be tormented
+with any more complaints. I
+am disgusted with myself for having so
+long importuned you with my affection.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>My child is very well. We shall soon
+meet, to part no more, I hope&mdash;I mean,
+I and my girl.&mdash;I shall wait with some<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-183" id="CPg_3-183"></a>[<a href="images/v3-183.png">183</a>]</span>
+degree of anxiety till I am informed
+how your affairs terminate.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">August 26.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I arrived</span> here last night, and with
+the most exquisite delight, once more
+pressed my babe to my heart. We
+shall part no more. You perhaps cannot
+conceive the pleasure it gave me, to
+see her run about, and play alone. Her
+increasing intelligence attaches me more
+and more to her. I have promised her that
+I will fulfil my duty to her; and nothing<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-184" id="CPg_3-184"></a>[<a href="images/v3-184.png">184</a>]</span>
+in future shall make me forget it. I
+will also exert myself to obtain an independence
+for her; but I will not be
+too anxious on this head.</p>
+
+<p>I have already told you, that I have
+recovered my health. Vigour, and
+even vivacity of mind, have returned
+with a renovated constitution. As for
+peace, we will not talk of it. I was
+not made, perhaps, to enjoy the calm
+contentment so termed.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>You tell me that my letters torture
+you; I will not describe the effect
+yours have on me. I received
+three this morning, the last dated the
+7th of this month. I mean not to give
+vent to the emotions they produced.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-185" id="CPg_3-185"></a>[<a href="images/v3-185.png">185</a>]</span>&mdash;Certainly
+you are right; our minds are
+not congenial. I have lived in an ideal
+world, and fostered sentiments that you
+do not comprehend&mdash;or you would not
+treat me thus. I am not, I will not
+be, merely an object of compassion&mdash;a
+clog, however light, to teize you. Forget
+that I exist: I will never remind
+you. Something emphatical whispers
+me to put an end to these struggles.
+Be free&mdash;I will not torment, when I
+cannot please. I can take care of my
+child; you need not continually tell me
+that our fortune is inseparable, <i>that you
+will try to cherish tenderness</i> for me. Do
+no violence to yourself! When we are
+separated, our interest, since you give
+so much weight to pecuniary considerations,
+will be entirely divided. I want
+not protection without affection; and
+support I need not, whilst my faculties<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-186" id="CPg_3-186"></a>[<a href="images/v3-186.png">186</a>]</span>
+are undisturbed. I had a dislike to living
+in England; but painful feelings
+must give way to superior considerations.
+I may not be able to acquire
+the sum necessary to maintain my child
+and self elsewhere. It is too late to go to
+Switzerland. I shall not remain at &mdash;&mdash;,
+living expensively. But be not alarmed!
+I shall not force myself on you any
+more.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! I am agitated&mdash;my whole
+frame is convulsed&mdash;my lips tremble,
+as if shook by cold, though fire seems to
+be circulating in my veins.</p>
+
+<p>God bless you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-187" id="CPg_3-187"></a>[<a href="images/v3-187.png">187</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 6.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I received</span> just now your letter of the
+20th. I had written you a letter last
+night, into which imperceptibly slipt
+some of my bitterness of soul. I will
+copy the part relative to business. I
+am not sufficiently vain to imagine that
+I can, for more than a moment, cloud
+your enjoyment of life&mdash;to prevent
+even that, you had better never hear
+from me&mdash;and repose on the idea that
+I am happy.</p>
+
+<p>Gracious God! It is impossible for
+me to stifle something like resentment,
+when I receive fresh proofs of your in<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-188" id="CPg_3-188"></a>[<a href="images/v3-188.png">188</a>]</span>difference.
+What I have suffered this
+last year, is not to be forgotten! I
+have not that happy substitute for wisdom,
+insensibility&mdash;and the lively sympathies
+which bind me to my fellow-creatures,
+are all of a painful kind.&mdash;They
+are the agonies of a broken heart&mdash;pleasure
+and I have shaken hands.</p>
+
+<p>I see here nothing but heaps of ruins,
+and only converse with people immersed
+in trade and sensuality.</p>
+
+<p>I am weary of travelling&mdash;yet seem
+to have no home&mdash;no resting place to
+look to.&mdash;I am strangely cast off.&mdash;How
+often, passing through the rocks, I have
+thought, "But for this child, I would
+lay my head on one of them, and never
+open my eyes again!" With a heart
+feelingly alive to all the affections of
+my nature&mdash;I have never met with one,
+softer than the stone that I would fain<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-189" id="CPg_3-189"></a>[<a href="images/v3-189.png">189</a>]</span>
+take for my last pillow. I once thought
+I had, but it was all a delusion. I meet
+with families continually, who are
+bound together by affection or principle&mdash;and,
+when I am conscious that I
+have fulfilled the duties of my station,
+almost to a forgetfulness of myself, I
+am ready to demand, in a murmuring
+tone, of Heaven, "Why am I thus
+abandoned?"</p>
+
+<p>You say now&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I do not understand you. It is necessary
+for you to write more explicitly&mdash;and
+determine on some mode of conduct.&mdash;I
+cannot endure this suspense&mdash;Decide&mdash;Do
+you fear to strike another
+blow? We live together, or eternally
+part!&mdash;I shall not write to you again,
+till I receive an answer to this. I must<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-190" id="CPg_3-190"></a>[<a href="images/v3-190.png">190</a>]</span>
+compose my tortured soul, before I
+write on indifferent subjects.&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I do not know whether I write intelligibly,
+for my head is disturbed.&mdash;But this
+you ought to pardon&mdash;for it is with difficulty
+frequently that I make out what
+you mean to say&mdash;You write, I suppose,
+at Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s after dinner, when your
+head is not the clearest&mdash;and as for your
+heart, if you have one, I see nothing
+like the dictates of affection, unless a
+glimpse when you mention, the child.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-191" id="CPg_3-191"></a>[<a href="images/v3-191.png">191</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 25.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> just finished a letter, to be
+given in charge to captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;.
+In that I complained of your silence,
+and expressed my surprise that three
+mails should have arrived without
+bringing a line for me. Since I
+closed it, I hear of another, and still
+no letter.&mdash;I am labouring to write
+calmly&mdash;this silence is a refinement on
+cruelty. Had captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; remained
+a few days longer, I would have
+returned with him to England. What
+have I to do here? I have repeatedly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-192" id="CPg_3-192"></a>[<a href="images/v3-192.png">192</a>]</span>
+written to you fully. Do you do the
+same&mdash;and quickly. Do not leave me
+in suspense. I have not deserved this
+of you. I cannot write, my mind is
+so distressed. Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+
+<h4>END VOL. III.</h4>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_4-A_12" id="CFootnote_4-A_12"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_4-A_12"><span class="label">[4-A]</span></a> The child is in a subsequent letter called the
+"barrier girl," probably from a supposition that
+she owed her existence to this interview.
+</p><p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_7-A_13" id="CFootnote_7-A_13"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_7-A_13"><span class="label">[7-A]</span></a> This and the thirteen following letters appear
+to have been written during a separation of several
+months; the date, Paris.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_27-A_14" id="CFootnote_27-A_14"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_27-A_14"><span class="label">[27-A]</span></a> Some further letters, written during the remainder
+of the week, in a similar strain to the
+preceding, appear to have been destroyed by the
+person to whom they were addressed.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_47-A_15" id="CFootnote_47-A_15"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_47-A_15"><span class="label">[47-A]</span></a> The child spoken of in some preceding letters,
+had now been born a considerable time.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_50-A_16" id="CFootnote_50-A_16"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_50-A_16"><span class="label">[50-A]</span></a> She means, "the latter more than the former."
+</p><p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_58-A_17" id="CFootnote_58-A_17"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_58-A_17"><span class="label">[58-A]</span></a> This is the first of a series of letters written
+during a separation of many months, to which no
+cordial meeting ever succeeded. They were sent
+from Paris, and bear the address of London.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_91-A_18" id="CFootnote_91-A_18"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_91-A_18"><span class="label">[91-A]</span></a> The person to whom the letters are addressed,
+was about this time at Ramsgate, on his return,
+as he professed, to Paris, when he was recalled,
+as it should seem, to London, by the further pressure
+of business now accumulated upon him.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_100-A_19" id="CFootnote_100-A_19"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_100-A_19"><span class="label">[100-A]</span></a> This probably alludes to some expression of
+the person to whom the letters are addressed, in
+which he treated as common evils, things upon
+which the letter writer was disposed to bestow a
+different appellation.
+</p><p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_133-A_20" id="CFootnote_133-A_20"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_133-A_20"><span class="label">[133-A]</span></a> This passage refers to letters written under
+a purpose of suicide, and not intended to be
+opened till after the catastrophe.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-i_S" id="CPg_3-i_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-ii_S" id="CPg_3-ii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="V3S" id="V3S"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. III.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-iii_S" id="CPg_3-iii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-iv_S" id="CPg_3-iv_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>LETTERS</h1>
+<h3>AND</h3>
+<h1>MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.</h1>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. I.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-v_S" id="CPg_3-v_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-vi_S" id="CPg_3-vi_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2><a name="CV3_PREFACE_S" id="CV3_PREFACE_S"></a>PREFACE.</h2>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> following Letters may po&#383;&#383;ibly
+be found to contain the fine&#383;t examples
+of the language of &#383;entiment and
+pa&#383;&#383;ion ever pre&#383;ented to the world.
+They bear a &#383;triking re&#383;emblance to
+the celebrated romance of Werter,
+though the incidents to which they relate
+are of a very different ca&#383;t. Probably
+the readers to whom Werter
+is incapable of affording plea&#383;ure, will
+receive no delight from the pre&#383;ent
+publication. The editor apprehends<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-vii_S" id="CPg_3-vii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-vii.png">vii</a>]</span>
+that, in the judgment of tho&#383;e be&#383;t
+qualified to decide upon the compari&#383;on,
+the&#383;e Letters will be admitted to
+have the &#383;uperiority over the fiction of
+Goethe. They are the off&#383;pring of a
+glowing imagination, and a heart penetrated
+with the pa&#383;&#383;ion it e&#383;&#383;ays to de&#383;cribe.</p>
+
+<p>To the &#383;eries of letters con&#383;tituting
+the principal article in the&#383;e two volumes,
+are added various pieces, none
+of which, it is hoped, will be found
+di&#383;creditable to the talents of the author.
+The &#383;light fragment of Letters on
+the Management of Infants, may be
+thought a trifle; but it &#383;eems to have
+&#383;ome value, as pre&#383;enting to us with
+vividne&#383;s the intention of the writer on<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-viii_S" id="CPg_3-viii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-viii.png">viii</a>]</span>
+this important &#383;ubject. The publication
+of a few &#383;elect Letters to Mr.
+John&#383;on, appeared to be at once a ju&#383;t
+monument to the &#383;incerity of his friend&#383;hip,
+and a valuable and intere&#383;ting
+&#383;pecimen of the mind of the writer.
+The Letter on the Pre&#383;ent Character
+of the French Nation, the Extract of
+the Cave of Fancy, a Tale, and the
+Hints for the Second Part of the Rights
+of Woman, may, I believe, &#383;afely be
+left to &#383;peak for them&#383;elves. The E&#383;&#383;ay
+on Poetry and our Reli&#383;h for the Beauties
+of Nature, appeared in the Monthly
+Magazine for April la&#383;t, and is the
+only piece in this collection which has
+previou&#383;ly found its way to the pre&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-ix_S" id="CPg_3-ix_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-ix.png">ix</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-1_S" id="CPg_3-1_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<h2><a name="CV3_LETTERS_S" id="CV3_LETTERS_S"></a>LETTERS.</h2>
+
+
+<h4>LETTER I</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Two o'Clock.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> dear love, after making my
+arrangements for our &#383;nug dinner to-day,
+I have been taken by &#383;torm,
+and obliged to promi&#383;e to dine, at
+an early hour, with the Mi&#383;s &mdash;&mdash;s,
+the <i>only</i> day they intend to pa&#383;s here.
+I &#383;hall however leave the key in the
+door, and hope to find you at my
+fire-&#383;ide when I return, about eight
+o'clock. Will you not wait for poor
+Joan?&mdash;whom you will find better, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-2_S" id="CPg_3-2_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-2.png">2</a>]</span>
+till then think very affectionately of
+her.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours, truly, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I am &#383;itting down to dinner; &#383;o do
+not &#383;end an an&#383;wer.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER II</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Pa&#383;t Twelve o'Clock, Monday night.</p>
+
+<p class="right">[Augu&#383;t.]&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I obey</span> an emotion of my heart,
+which made me think of wi&#383;hing thee,
+my love, good-night! before I go to
+re&#383;t, with more tenderne&#383;s than I can
+to-morrow, when writing a ha&#383;ty line
+or two under Colonel &mdash;&mdash;'s eye. You
+can &#383;carcely imagine with what plea&#383;ure
+I anticipate the day, when we are<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-3_S" id="CPg_3-3_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-3.png">3</a>]</span>
+to begin almo&#383;t to live together; and
+you would &#383;mile to hear how many
+plans of employment I have in my head,
+now that I am confident my heart has
+found peace in your bo&#383;om.&mdash;Cheri&#383;h
+me with that dignified tenderne&#383;s,
+which I have only found in you; and
+your own dear girl will try to keep under
+a quickne&#383;s of feeling, that has
+&#383;ometimes given you pain&mdash;Yes, I will
+be <i>good</i>, that I may de&#383;erve to be happy;
+and whil&#383;t you love me, I cannot
+again fall into the mi&#383;erable &#383;tate, which
+rendered life a burthen almo&#383;t too heavy
+to be borne.</p>
+
+<p>But, good-night!&mdash;God ble&#383;s you!
+Sterne &#383;ays, that is equal to a ki&#383;s&mdash;yet
+I would rather give you the ki&#383;s into
+the bargain, glowing with gratitude to
+Heaven, and affection to you. I like
+the word affection, becau&#383;e it &#383;ignifies<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-4_S" id="CPg_3-4_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+&#383;omething habitual; and we are &#383;oon to
+meet, to try whether we have mind
+enough to keep our hearts warm.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I will be at the barrier a little after
+ten o'clock to-morrow<a name="FNanchor_4-A_12_S" id="CFNanchor_4-A_12_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_4-A_12_S" class="fnanchor">[4-A]</a>.&mdash;Yours&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER III</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> have often called me, dear girl,
+but you would now &#383;ay good, did you
+know how very attentive I have been
+to the &mdash;&mdash; ever &#383;ince I came to Paris.
+I am not however going to trouble<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-5_S" id="CPg_3-5_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+you with the account, becau&#383;e I like to
+&#383;ee your eyes prai&#383;e me; and, Milton
+in&#383;inuates, that, during &#383;uch recitals,
+there are interruptions, not ungrateful
+to the heart, when the honey that drops
+from the lips is not merely words.</p>
+
+<p>Yet, I &#383;hall not (let me tell you before
+the&#383;e people enter, to force me to
+huddle away my letter) be content with
+only a ki&#383;s of <span class="smcap">duty</span>&mdash;you <i>mu&#383;t</i> be glad to
+&#383;ee me&mdash;becau&#383;e you are glad&mdash;or I will
+make love to the <i>&#383;hade</i> of Mirabeau, to
+whom my heart continually turned,
+whil&#383;t I was talking with Madame
+&mdash;&mdash;, forcibly telling me, that it will
+ever have &#383;ufficient warmth to love,
+whether I will or not, &#383;entiment, though
+I &#383;o highly re&#383;pect principle.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Not that I think Mirabeau utterly
+devoid of principles&mdash;Far from it&mdash;and,
+if I had not begun to form a new the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-6_S" id="CPg_3-6_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-6.png">6</a>]</span>ory
+re&#383;pecting men, I &#383;hould, in the vanity
+of my heart, have <i>imagined</i> that <i>I</i>
+could have made &#383;omething of his&mdash;&mdash;it
+was compo&#383;ed of &#383;uch materials&mdash;Hu&#383;h!
+here they come&mdash;and love flies
+away in the twinkling of an eye, leaving
+a little bru&#383;h of his wing on my
+pale cheeks.</p>
+
+<p>I hope to &#383;ee Dr. &mdash;&mdash; this morning;
+I am going to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s to meet him.
+&mdash;&mdash;, and &#383;ome others, are invited to
+dine with us to-day; and to-morrow I
+am to &#383;pend the day with &mdash;&mdash;.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall probably not be able to return
+to &mdash;&mdash; to-morrow; but it is no matter,
+becau&#383;e I mu&#383;t take a carriage, I
+have &#383;o many books, that I immediately
+want, to take with me.&mdash;On Friday
+then I &#383;hall expect you to dine
+with me&mdash;and, if you come a little before
+dinner, it is &#383;o long &#383;ince I have<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-7_S" id="CPg_3-7_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-7.png">7</a>]</span>
+&#383;een you, you will not be &#383;colded by
+yours affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER IV<a name="FNanchor_7-A_13_S" id="CFNanchor_7-A_13_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_7-A_13_S" class="fnanchor">[7-A]</a>.</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Morning [September.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">A man</span>, whom a letter from Mr. &mdash;&mdash;
+previou&#383;ly announced, called here ye&#383;terday
+for the payment of a draft; and,
+as he &#383;eemed di&#383;appointed at not finding
+you at home, I &#383;ent him to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;.
+I have &#383;ince &#383;een him, and he tells me
+that he has &#383;ettled the bu&#383;ine&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>So much for bu&#383;ine&#383;s!&mdash;May I venture
+to talk a little longer about le&#383;s
+weighty affairs?&mdash;How are you?&mdash;I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-8_S" id="CPg_3-8_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-8.png">8</a>]</span>
+have been following you all along the
+road this comfortle&#383;s weather; for,
+when I am ab&#383;ent from tho&#383;e I love, my
+imagination is as lively, as if my &#383;en&#383;es
+had never been gratified by their pre&#383;ence&mdash;I
+was going to &#383;ay care&#383;&#383;es&mdash;and
+why &#383;hould I not? I have found out
+that I have more mind than you, in one
+re&#383;pect; becau&#383;e I can, without any
+violent effort of rea&#383;on, find food for
+love in the &#383;ame object, much longer
+than you can.&mdash;The way to my &#383;en&#383;es
+is through my heart; but, forgive me!
+I think there is &#383;ometimes a &#383;horter cut
+to yours.</p>
+
+<p>With ninety-nine men out of a hundred,
+a very &#383;ufficient da&#383;h of folly is
+nece&#383;&#383;ary to render a woman <i>piquante</i>, a
+&#383;oft word for de&#383;irable; and, beyond
+the&#383;e ca&#383;ual ebullitions of &#383;ympathy,
+few look for enjoyment by fo&#383;tering a<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-9_S" id="CPg_3-9_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-9.png">9</a>]</span>
+pa&#383;&#383;ion in their hearts. One rea&#383;on, in
+&#383;hort, why I wi&#383;h my whole &#383;ex to become
+wi&#383;er, is, that the fooli&#383;h ones
+may not, by their pretty folly, rob tho&#383;e
+who&#383;e &#383;en&#383;ibility keeps down their vanity,
+of the few ro&#383;es that afford them
+&#383;ome &#383;olace in the thorny road of life.</p>
+
+<p>I do not know how I fell into the&#383;e
+reflections, excepting one thought produced
+it&mdash;that the&#383;e continual &#383;eparations
+were nece&#383;&#383;ary to warm your affection.&mdash;Of
+late, we are always &#383;eparating.&mdash;Crack!&mdash;crack!&mdash;and away
+you go.&mdash;This joke wears the &#383;allow
+ca&#383;t of thought; for, though I began to
+write cheerfully, &#383;ome melancholy tears
+have found their way into my eyes, that
+linger there, whil&#383;t a glow of tenderne&#383;s
+at my heart whi&#383;pers that you are one
+of the be&#383;t creatures in the world.&mdash;Pardon
+then the vagaries of a mind,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-10_S" id="CPg_3-10_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+that has been almo&#383;t "crazed by care,"
+as well as "cro&#383;&#383;ed in haple&#383;s love,"
+and bear with me a <i>little</i> longer!&mdash;When
+we are &#383;ettled in the country together,
+more duties will open before me, and
+my heart, which now, trembling into
+peace, is agitated by every emotion that
+awakens the remembrance of old griefs,
+will learn to re&#383;t on yours, with that
+dignity your character, not to talk of
+my own, demands.</p>
+
+<p>Take care of your&#383;elf&mdash;and write
+&#383;oon to your own girl (you may add
+dear, if you plea&#383;e) who &#383;incerely loves
+you, and will try to convince you of it,
+by becoming happier.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-11_S" id="CPg_3-11_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-11.png">11</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER V</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t received your letter, and
+feel as if I could not go to bed tranquilly
+without &#383;aying a few words in reply&mdash;merely
+to tell you, that my mind is &#383;erene,
+and my heart affectionate.</p>
+
+<p>Ever &#383;ince you la&#383;t &#383;aw me inclined
+to faint, I have felt &#383;ome gentle twitches,
+which make me begin to think, that I
+am nouri&#383;hing a creature who will &#383;oon
+be &#383;en&#383;ible of my care.&mdash;This thought
+has not only produced an overflowing of
+tenderne&#383;s to you, but made me very
+attentive to calm my mind and take
+exerci&#383;e, le&#383;t I &#383;hould de&#383;troy an object,
+in whom we are to have a mutual intere&#383;t,
+you know. Ye&#383;terday&mdash;do not
+&#383;mile!&mdash;finding that I had hurt my&#383;elf<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-12_S" id="CPg_3-12_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+by lifting precipitately a large log of
+wood, I &#383;at down in an agony, till I felt
+tho&#383;e &#383;aid twitches again.</p>
+
+<p>Are you very bu&#383;y?</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>So you may reckon on its being fini&#383;hed
+&#383;oon, though not before you come
+home, unle&#383;s you are detained longer
+than I now allow my&#383;elf to believe you
+will.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Be that as it may, write to me, my
+be&#383;t love, and bid me be patient&mdash;kindly&mdash;and
+the expre&#383;&#383;ions of kindne&#383;s
+will again beguile the time, as &#383;weetly
+as they have done to-night.&mdash;Tell me
+al&#383;o over and over again, that your
+happine&#383;s (and you de&#383;erve to be<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-13_S" id="CPg_3-13_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-13.png">13</a>]</span>
+happy!) is clo&#383;ely connected with
+mine, and I will try to di&#383;&#383;ipate, as they
+ri&#383;e, the fumes of former di&#383;content,
+that have too often clouded the &#383;un&#383;hine,
+which you have endeavoured to diffu&#383;e
+through my mind. God ble&#383;s you!
+Take care of your&#383;elf, and remember
+with tenderne&#383;s your affectionate</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I am going to re&#383;t very happy, and
+you have made me &#383;o.&mdash;This is the
+kinde&#383;t good-night I can utter.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-14_S" id="CPg_3-14_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-14.png">14</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> glad to find that other people
+can be unrea&#383;onable, as well as my&#383;elf&mdash;for
+be it known to thee, that I an&#383;wered
+thy <i>fir&#383;t</i> letter, the very night it
+reached me (Sunday), though thou
+could&#383;t not receive it before Wedne&#383;day,
+becau&#383;e it was not &#383;ent off till the
+next day.&mdash;There is a full, true, and
+particular account.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Yet I am not angry with thee, my
+love, for I think that it is a proof of
+&#383;tupidity, and likewi&#383;e of a milk-and-water
+affection, which comes to the
+&#383;ame thing, when the temper is governed
+by a &#383;quare and compa&#383;s.&mdash;There is
+nothing picture&#383;que in this &#383;traight-<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-15_S" id="CPg_3-15_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-15.png">15</a>]</span>lined
+equality, and the pa&#383;&#383;ions always
+give grace to the actions.</p>
+
+<p>Recollection now makes my heart
+bound to thee; but, it is not to thy
+money-getting face, though I cannot
+be &#383;eriou&#383;ly di&#383;plea&#383;ed with the exertion
+which increa&#383;es my e&#383;teem, or
+rather is what I &#383;hould have expected
+from thy character.&mdash;No; I have thy
+hone&#383;t countenance before me&mdash;Pop&mdash;relaxed
+by tenderne&#383;s; a little&mdash;little
+wounded by my whims; and thy eyes
+gli&#383;tening with &#383;ympathy.&mdash;Thy lips
+then feel &#383;ofter than &#383;oft&mdash;and I re&#383;t my
+cheek on thine, forgetting all the
+world.&mdash;I have not left the hue of love
+out of the picture&mdash;the ro&#383;y glow; and
+fancy has &#383;pread it over my own cheeks,
+I believe, for I feel them burning,
+whil&#383;t a delicious tear trembles in my
+eye, that would be all your own, if a<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-16_S" id="CPg_3-16_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-16.png">16</a>]</span>
+grateful emotion directed to the Father
+of nature, who has made me thus
+alive to happine&#383;s, did not give more
+warmth to the &#383;entiment it divides&mdash;I
+mu&#383;t pau&#383;e a moment.</p>
+
+<p>Need I tell you that I am tranquil
+after writing thus?&mdash;I do not know
+why, but I have more confidence in
+your affection, when ab&#383;ent, than pre&#383;ent;
+nay, I think that you mu&#383;t love
+me, for, in the &#383;incerity of my heart
+let me &#383;ay it, I believe I de&#383;erve your
+tenderne&#383;s, becau&#383;e I am true, and
+have a degree of &#383;en&#383;ibility that you
+can &#383;ee and reli&#383;h.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-17_S" id="CPg_3-17_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-17.png">17</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning [December 29.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> &#383;eem to have taken up your
+abode at H&mdash;&mdash;. Pray &#383;ir! when do
+you think of coming home? or, to
+write very con&#383;iderately, when will
+bu&#383;ine&#383;s permit you? I &#383;hall expect
+(as the country people &#383;ay in England)
+that you will make a <i>power</i> of money to
+indemnify me for your ab&#383;ence.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-18_S" id="CPg_3-18_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-18.png">18</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Well! but, my love, to the old &#383;tory&mdash;am
+I to &#383;ee you this week, or this
+month?&mdash;I do not know what you are
+about&mdash;for, as you did not tell me, I
+would not a&#383;k Mr. &mdash;&mdash;, who is generally
+pretty communicative.</p>
+
+<p>I long to &#383;ee Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;; not to
+hear from you, &#383;o do not give your&#383;elf
+airs, but to get a letter from Mr. &mdash;&mdash;.
+And I am half angry with you for not
+informing me whether &#383;he had brought
+one with her or not.&mdash;On this &#383;core I
+will cork up &#383;ome of the kind things
+that were ready to drop from my pen,
+which has never been dipt in gall when
+addre&#383;&#383;ing you; or, will only &#383;uffer an
+exclamation&mdash;"The creature!" or a
+kind look, to e&#383;cape me, when I pa&#383;s
+the &#383;lippers&mdash;which I could not remove
+from my <i>&#383;alle</i> door, though they are
+not the hand&#383;ome&#383;t of their kind.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-19_S" id="CPg_3-19_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-19.png">19</a>]</span>
+Be not too anxious to get money!&mdash;for
+nothing worth having is to be purcha&#383;ed.
+God ble&#383;s you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER VIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Night [December 30.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> be&#383;t love, your letter to-night
+was particularly grateful to my heart,
+depre&#383;&#383;ed by the letters I received by
+&mdash;&mdash;, for he brought me &#383;everal, and
+the parcel of books directed to Mr.
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; was for me. Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+letter was long and very affectionate;
+but the account he gives me of his own<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-20_S" id="CPg_3-20_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-20.png">20</a>]</span>
+affairs, though he obviou&#383;ly makes the
+be&#383;t of them, has vexed me.</p>
+
+<p>A melancholy letter from my &#383;i&#383;ter
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has al&#383;o harra&#383;&#383;ed my mind&mdash;that
+from my brother would have given
+me &#383;incere plea&#383;ure; but for&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>There is a &#383;pirit of independence in
+his letter, that will plea&#383;e you; and you
+&#383;hall &#383;ee it, when we are once more over
+the fire together.&mdash;I think that you
+would hail him as a brother, with one<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-21_S" id="CPg_3-21_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-21.png">21</a>]</span>
+of your tender looks, when your heart
+not only gives a lu&#383;tre to your eye, but
+a dance of playfulne&#383;s, that he would
+meet with a glow half made up of ba&#383;hfulne&#383;s,
+and a de&#383;ire to plea&#383;e the&mdash;&mdash;where
+&#383;hall I find a word to expre&#383;s
+the relation&#383;hip which &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;ts between
+us?&mdash;Shall I a&#383;k the little twitcher?&mdash;But
+I have dropt half the &#383;entence
+that was to tell you how much he
+would be inclined to love the man loved
+by his &#383;i&#383;ter. I have been fancying my&#383;elf
+&#383;itting between you, ever &#383;ince I
+began to write, and my heart has leaped
+at the thought!&mdash;You &#383;ee how I chat
+to you.</p>
+
+<p>I did not receive your letter till I
+came home; and I did not expect it,
+for the po&#383;t came in much later than
+u&#383;ual. It was a cordial to me&mdash;and I
+wanted one.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-22_S" id="CPg_3-22_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-22.png">22</a>]</span>
+Mr. &mdash;&mdash; tells me that he has written
+again and again.&mdash;Love him a little!&mdash;It
+would be a kind of &#383;eparation, if you
+did not love tho&#383;e I love.</p>
+
+<p>There was &#383;o much con&#383;iderate tenderne&#383;s
+in your epi&#383;tle to-night, that, if
+it has not made you dearer to me, it has
+made me forcibly feel how very dear
+you are to me, by charming away half
+my cares.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER IX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tue&#383;day Morning [December 31.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Though</span> I have ju&#383;t &#383;ent a letter off,
+yet, as captain &mdash;&mdash; offers to take one,
+I am not willing to let him go without
+a kind greeting, becau&#383;e trifles of this<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-23_S" id="CPg_3-23_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-23.png">23</a>]</span>
+&#383;ort, without having any effect on my
+mind, damp my &#383;pirits:&mdash;and you, with
+all your &#383;truggles to be manly, have
+&#383;ome of this &#383;ame &#383;en&#383;ibility.&mdash;Do not
+bid it begone, for I love to &#383;ee it
+&#383;triving to ma&#383;ter your features; be&#383;ides,
+the&#383;e kind of &#383;ympathies are the life of
+affection: and why, in cultivating our
+under&#383;tandings, &#383;hould we try to dry up
+the&#383;e &#383;prings of plea&#383;ure, which gu&#383;h
+out to give a fre&#383;hne&#383;s to days browned
+by care!</p>
+
+<p>The books &#383;ent to me are &#383;uch as
+we may read together; &#383;o I &#383;hall not
+look into them till you return; when
+you &#383;hall read, whil&#383;t I mend my &#383;tockings.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-24_S" id="CPg_3-24_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-24.png">24</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER X</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day Night [January 1.]</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> I have been, you tell me, three
+days without writing, I ought not to
+complain of two: yet, as I expected to
+receive a letter this afternoon, I am
+hurt; and why &#383;hould I, by concealing
+it, affect the heroi&#383;m I do not feel?</p>
+
+<p>I hate commerce. How differently
+mu&#383;t &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s head and heart be organized
+from mine! You will tell me,
+that exertions are nece&#383;&#383;ary: I am
+weary of them! The face of things,
+public and private, vexes me. The
+"peace" and clemency which &#383;eemed
+to be dawning a few days ago, di&#383;appear
+again. "I am fallen," as Milton &#383;aid,
+"on evil days;" for I really believe<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-25_S" id="CPg_3-25_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-25.png">25</a>]</span>
+that Europe will be in a &#383;tate of convul&#383;ion,
+during half a century at lea&#383;t.
+Life is but a labour of patience: it is
+always rolling a great &#383;tone up a hill;
+for, before a per&#383;on can find a re&#383;ting-place,
+imagining it is lodged, down it
+comes again, and all the work is to be
+done over anew!</p>
+
+<p>Should I attempt to write any more,
+I could not change the &#383;train. My head
+aches, and my heart is heavy. The
+world appears an "unweeded garden,"
+where "things rank and vile" flouri&#383;h
+be&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>If you do not return &#383;oon&mdash;or, which
+is no &#383;uch mighty matter, talk of it&mdash;I
+will throw your &#383;lippers out at
+window, and be off&mdash;nobody knows
+where.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-26_S" id="CPg_3-26_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-26.png">26</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Finding that I was ob&#383;erved, I told
+the good women, the two Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;s,
+&#383;imply that I was with child: and let
+them &#383;tare! and &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;,
+nay, all the world, may know it for
+aught I care!&mdash;Yet I wi&#383;h to avoid
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s coar&#383;e jokes.</p>
+
+<p>Con&#383;idering the care and anxiety a
+woman mu&#383;t have about a child before
+it comes into the world, it &#383;eems to
+me, by a <i>natural right</i>, to belong to
+her. When men get immer&#383;ed in the
+world, they &#383;eem to lo&#383;e all &#383;en&#383;ations,
+excepting tho&#383;e nece&#383;&#383;ary to continue or
+produce life!&mdash;Are the&#383;e the privileges
+of rea&#383;on? Among&#383;t the feathered race,
+whil&#383;t the hen keeps the young warm,
+her mate &#383;tays by to cheer her; but it
+is &#383;ufficient for man to conde&#383;cend to
+get a child, in order to claim it.&mdash;A
+man is a tyrant!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-27_S" id="CPg_3-27_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-27.png">27</a>]</span>
+You may now tell me, that, if it were
+not for me, you would be laughing
+away with &#383;ome hone&#383;t fellows in L&mdash;n.
+The ca&#383;ual exerci&#383;e of &#383;ocial &#383;ympathy
+would not be &#383;ufficient for me&mdash;I &#383;hould
+not think &#383;uch an heartle&#383;s life worth
+pre&#383;erving.&mdash;It is nece&#383;&#383;ary to be in
+good-humour with you, to be plea&#383;ed
+with the world.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p class="right">Thur&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I was</span> very low-&#383;pirited la&#383;t night,
+ready to quarrel with your cheerful
+temper, which makes ab&#383;ence ea&#383;y to
+you.&mdash;And, why &#383;hould I mince the
+the matter? I was offended at your not
+even mentioning it.&mdash;I do not want to
+be loved like a godde&#383;s; but I wi&#383;h to
+be nece&#383;&#383;ary to you. God ble&#383;s you<a name="FNanchor_27-A_14_S" id="CFNanchor_27-A_14_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_27-A_14_S" class="fnanchor">[27-A]</a>!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-28_S" id="CPg_3-28_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-28.png">28</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h4>LETTER XI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t received your kind and
+rational letter, and would fain hide my
+face, glowing with &#383;hame for my folly.&mdash;I
+would hide it in your bo&#383;om, if you
+would again open it to me, and ne&#383;tle
+clo&#383;ely till you bade my fluttering
+heart be &#383;till, by &#383;aying that you forgave
+me. With eyes overflowing with
+tears, and in the humble&#383;t attitude, I
+intreat you.&mdash;Do not turn from me, for
+indeed I love you fondly, and have been
+very wretched, &#383;ince the night I was &#383;o
+cruelly hurt by thinking that you had
+no confidence in me&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>It is time for me to grow more rea&#383;onable,
+a few more of the&#383;e caprices
+of &#383;en&#383;ibility would de&#383;troy me. I have,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-29_S" id="CPg_3-29_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+in fact, been very much indi&#383;po&#383;ed for
+a few days pa&#383;t, and the notion that I
+was tormenting, or perhaps killing, a
+poor little animal, about whom I am
+grown anxious and tender, now I feel
+it alive, made me wor&#383;e. My bowels
+have been dreadfully di&#383;ordered, and
+every thing I ate or drank di&#383;agreed
+with my &#383;tomach; &#383;till I feel intimations
+of its exi&#383;tence, though they have been
+fainter.</p>
+
+<p>Do you think that the creature goes
+regularly to &#383;leep? I am ready to a&#383;k as
+many que&#383;tions as Voltaire's Man of
+Forty Crowns. Ah! do not continue to
+be angry with me! You perceive that I
+am already &#383;miling through my tears&mdash;You
+have lightened my heart, and my
+frozen &#383;pirits are melting into playfulne&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>Write the moment you receive this.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-30_S" id="CPg_3-30_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+I &#383;hall count the minutes. But drop
+not an angry word&mdash;I cannot now bear
+it. Yet, if you think I de&#383;erve a &#383;colding
+(it does not admit of a que&#383;tion, I
+grant), wait till you come back&mdash;and
+then, if you are angry one day, I &#383;hall
+be &#383;ure of &#383;eeing you the next.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; did not write to you, I &#383;uppo&#383;e,
+becau&#383;e he talked of going to
+H&mdash;&mdash;. Hearing that I was ill, he called
+very kindly on me, not dreaming that
+it was &#383;ome words that he incautiou&#383;ly
+let fall, which rendered me &#383;o.</p>
+
+<p>God ble&#383;s you, my love; do not &#383;hut
+your heart again&#383;t a return of tenderne&#383;s;
+and, as I now in fancy cling to
+you, be more than ever my &#383;upport.&mdash;Feel
+but as affectionate when you read
+this letter, as I did writing it, and you
+will make happy, your</p>
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-31_S" id="CPg_3-31_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-31.png">31</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h4>LETTER XII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I will</span> never, if I am not entirely
+cured of quarrelling, begin to encourage
+"quick-coming fancies," when
+we are &#383;eparated. Ye&#383;terday, my love,
+I could not open your letter for &#383;ome
+time; and, though it was not half as
+&#383;evere as I merited, it threw me into
+&#383;uch a fit of trembling, as &#383;eriou&#383;ly
+alarmed me. I did not, as you may
+&#383;uppo&#383;e, care for a little pain on my
+own account; but all the fears which
+I have had for a few days pa&#383;t, returned
+with fre&#383;h force. This morning I am
+better; will you not be glad to hear it?
+You perceive that &#383;orrow has almo&#383;t
+made a child of me, and that I want to
+be &#383;oothed to peace.</p>
+
+<p>One thing you mi&#383;take in my cha<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-32_S" id="CPg_3-32_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-32.png">32</a>]</span>racter,
+and imagine that to be coldne&#383;s
+which is ju&#383;t the contrary. For, when
+I am hurt by the per&#383;on mo&#383;t dear to
+me, I mu&#383;t let out a whole torrent of
+emotions, in which tenderne&#383;s would
+be uppermo&#383;t, or &#383;tifle them altogether;
+and it appears to me almo&#383;t a duty to
+&#383;tifle them, when I imagine <i>that I am
+treated with coldne&#383;s</i>.</p>
+
+<p>I am afraid that I have vexed you,
+my own &mdash;&mdash;. I know the quickne&#383;s
+of your feelings&mdash;and let me, in the
+&#383;incerity of my heart, a&#383;&#383;ure you, there
+is nothing I would not &#383;uffer to make
+you happy. My own happine&#383;s wholly
+depends on you&mdash;and, knowing you,
+when my rea&#383;on is not clouded, I look
+forward to a rational pro&#383;pect of as much
+felicity as the earth affords&mdash;with a little
+da&#383;h of rapture into the bargain, if
+you will look at me, when we meet<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-33_S" id="CPg_3-33_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+again, as you have &#383;ometimes greeted,
+your humbled, yet mo&#383;t affectionate</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thur&#383;day Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been wi&#383;hing the time away,
+my kind love, unable to re&#383;t till I knew
+that my penitential letter had reached
+your hand&mdash;and this afternoon, when
+your tender epi&#383;tle of Tue&#383;day gave
+&#383;uch exqui&#383;ite plea&#383;ure to your poor
+&#383;ick girl, her heart &#383;mote her to think
+that you were &#383;till to receive another
+cold one.&mdash;Burn it al&#383;o, my &mdash;&mdash;; yet
+do not forget that even tho&#383;e letters
+were full of love; and I &#383;hall ever recollect,
+that you did not wait to be
+mollified by my penitence, before you
+took me again to your heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-34_S" id="CPg_3-34_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-34.png">34</a>]</span>
+I have been unwell, and would not,
+now I am recovering, take a journey,
+becau&#383;e I have been &#383;eriou&#383;ly alarmed
+and angry with my&#383;elf, dreading continually
+the fatal con&#383;equence of my
+folly.&mdash;But, &#383;hould you think it right
+to remain at H&mdash;, I &#383;hall find &#383;ome opportunity,
+in the cour&#383;e of a fortnight,
+or le&#383;s perhaps, to come to you, and
+before then I &#383;hall be &#383;trong again.&mdash;Yet
+do not be unea&#383;y! I am really better,
+and never took &#383;uch care of my&#383;elf, as
+I have done &#383;ince you re&#383;tored my peace
+of mind. The girl is come to warm
+my bed&mdash;&#383;o I will tenderly &#383;ay, good
+night! and write a line or two in the
+morning.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wi&#383;h</span> you were here to walk
+with me this fine morning! yet your
+ab&#383;ence &#383;hall not prevent me. I have
+&#383;tayed at home too much; though,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-35_S" id="CPg_3-35_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+when I was &#383;o dreadfully out of &#383;pirits,
+I was carele&#383;s of every thing.</p>
+
+<p>I will now &#383;ally forth (you will go
+with me in my heart) and try whether
+this fine bracing <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'a r'">air</ins> will not give the
+vigour to the poor babe, it had, before
+I &#383;o incon&#383;iderately gave way to the
+grief that deranged my bowels, and
+gave a turn to my whole &#383;y&#383;tem.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;* * * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-36_S" id="CPg_3-36_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-36.png">36</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> two or three letters, which I
+have written to you lately, my love, will
+&#383;erve as an an&#383;wer to your explanatory
+one. I cannot but re&#383;pect your motives
+and conduct. I always re&#383;pected
+them; and was only hurt, by what
+&#383;eemed to me a want of confidence, and
+con&#383;equently affection.&mdash;I thought al&#383;o,
+that if you were obliged to &#383;tay three
+months at H&mdash;, I might as well have
+been with you.&mdash;Well! well, what &#383;ignifies
+what I brooded over&mdash;Let us now
+be friends!</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall probably receive a letter from
+you to-day, &#383;ealing my pardon&mdash;and I
+will be careful not to torment you with<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-37_S" id="CPg_3-37_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-37.png">37</a>]</span>
+my querulous humours, at lea&#383;t, till I
+&#383;ee you again. Act as circum&#383;tances
+direct, and I will not enquire when
+they will permit you to return, convinced
+that you will ha&#383;ten to your
+* * * *, when you have attained (or
+lo&#383;t &#383;ight of) the object of your journey.</p>
+
+<p>What a picture have you &#383;ketched of
+our fire-&#383;ide! Yes, my love, my fancy
+was in&#383;tantly at work, and I found my
+head on your &#383;houlder, whil&#383;t my eyes
+were fixed on the little creatures that
+were clinging about your knees. I did
+not ab&#383;olutely determine that there
+&#383;hould be &#383;ix&mdash;if you have not &#383;et your
+heart on this round number.</p>
+
+<p>I am going to dine with Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;.
+I have not been to vi&#383;it her &#383;ince the
+fir&#383;t day &#383;he came to Paris. I wi&#383;h
+indeed to be out in the air as much as
+I can; for the exerci&#383;e I have taken<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-38_S" id="CPg_3-38_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-38.png">38</a>]</span>
+the&#383;e two or three days pa&#383;t, has been
+of &#383;uch &#383;ervice to me, that I hope
+&#383;hortly to tell you, that I am quite well.
+I have &#383;carcely &#383;lept before la&#383;t night,
+and then not much.&mdash;The two Mrs.
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;s have been very anxious and
+tender.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I need not de&#383;ire you to give the
+colonel a good bottle of wine.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wrote</span> to you ye&#383;terday, my &mdash;&mdash;;
+but, finding that the colonel is &#383;till detained
+(for his pa&#383;&#383;port was forgotten at
+the office ye&#383;terday) I am not willing to<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-39_S" id="CPg_3-39_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-39.png">39</a>]</span>
+let &#383;o many days elap&#383;e without your
+hearing from me, after having talked
+of illne&#383;s and apprehen&#383;ions.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot boa&#383;t of being quite recovered,
+yet I am (I mu&#383;t u&#383;e my York&#383;hire
+phra&#383;e; for, when my heart is
+warm, pop come the expre&#383;&#383;ions of
+childhood into my head) &#383;o <i>light&#383;ome</i>,
+that I think it will not <i>go badly with
+me</i>.&mdash;And nothing &#383;hall be wanting on
+my part, I a&#383;&#383;ure you; for I am urged
+on, not only by an enlivened affection
+for you, but by a new-born tenderne&#383;s
+that plays cheerly round my dilating
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>I was therefore, in defiance of cold
+and dirt, out in the air the greater part
+of ye&#383;terday; and, if I get over this
+evening without a return of the fever
+that has tormented me, I &#383;hall talk no
+more of illne&#383;s. I have promi&#383;ed the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-40_S" id="CPg_3-40_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+little creature, that its mother, who
+ought to cheri&#383;h it, will not again
+plague it, and begged it to pardon me;
+and, &#383;ince I could not hug either it or
+you to my brea&#383;t, I have to my heart.&mdash;I
+am afraid to read over this prattle&mdash;but
+it is only for your eye.</p>
+
+<p>I have been &#383;eriou&#383;ly vexed, to find
+that, whil&#383;t you were harra&#383;&#383;ed by impediments
+in your undertakings, I was
+giving you additional unea&#383;ine&#383;s.&mdash;If
+you can make any of your plans an&#383;wer&mdash;it
+is well, I do not think a <i>little</i> money
+inconvenient; but, &#383;hould they fail, we
+will &#383;truggle cheerfully together&mdash;drawn
+clo&#383;er by the pinching bla&#383;ts of
+poverty.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu, my love! Write often to
+your poor girl, and write long letters;
+for I not only like them for being longer,
+but becau&#383;e more heart &#383;teals into them;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-41_S" id="CPg_3-41_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+and I am happy to catch your heart
+whenever I can.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tue&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I &#383;eize</span> this opportunity to inform
+you, that I am to &#383;et out on Thur&#383;day
+with Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and hope to tell you
+&#383;oon (on your lips) how glad I &#383;hall be
+to &#383;ee you. I have ju&#383;t got my pa&#383;&#383;port,
+&#383;o I do not fore&#383;ee any impediment to
+my reaching H&mdash;&mdash;, to bid you good-night
+next Friday in my new apartment&mdash;where
+I am to meet you and love, in
+&#383;pite of care, to &#383;mile me to &#383;leep&mdash;for
+I have not caught much re&#383;t &#383;ince
+we parted.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-42_S" id="CPg_3-42_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-42.png">42</a>]</span>
+You have, by your tenderne&#383;s and
+worth, twi&#383;ted your&#383;elf more artfully
+round my heart, than I &#383;uppo&#383;ed po&#383;&#383;ible.&mdash;Let
+me indulge the thought,
+that I have thrown out &#383;ome tendrils to
+cling to the elm by which I wi&#383;h to be
+&#383;upported.&mdash;This is talking a new language
+for me!&mdash;But, knowing that I
+am not a para&#383;ite-plant, I am willing to
+receive the proofs of affection, that
+every pul&#383;e replies to, when I think of
+being once more in the &#383;ame hou&#383;e
+with you.&mdash;God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-43_S" id="CPg_3-43_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-43.png">43</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I only</span> &#383;end this as an <i>avant-coureur</i>,
+without jack-boots, to tell you, that I am
+again on the wing, and hope to be with
+you a few hours after you receive it. I
+&#383;hall find you well, and compo&#383;ed, I
+am &#383;ure; or, more properly &#383;peaking,
+cheerful.&mdash;What is the rea&#383;on that my
+&#383;pirits are not as manageable as yours?
+Yet, now I think of it, I will not allow
+that your temper is even, though
+I have promi&#383;ed my&#383;elf, in order to
+obtain my own forgivene&#383;s, that I will
+not ruffle it for a long, long time&mdash;I am
+afraid to &#383;ay never.</p>
+
+<p>Farewell for a moment!&mdash;Do not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-44_S" id="CPg_3-44_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-44.png">44</a>]</span>
+forget that I am driving towards you
+in per&#383;on! My mind, unfettered, has
+flown to you long &#383;ince, or rather has
+never left you.</p>
+
+<p>I am well, and have no apprehen&#383;ion
+that I &#383;hall find the journey too fatiguing,
+when I follow the lead of my
+heart.&mdash;With my face turned to H&mdash;
+my &#383;pirits will not &#383;ink&mdash;and my mind
+has always hitherto enabled my body
+to do whatever I wi&#383;hed.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-45_S" id="CPg_3-45_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-45.png">45</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">H&mdash;, Thur&#383;day Morning, March 12.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">We</span> are &#383;uch creatures of habit, my
+love, that, though I cannot &#383;ay I was
+&#383;orry, childi&#383;hly &#383;o, for your going,
+when I knew that you were to &#383;tay &#383;uch
+a &#383;hort time, and I had a plan of employment;
+yet I could not &#383;leep.&mdash;I
+turned to your &#383;ide of the bed, and
+tried to make the mo&#383;t of the comfort
+of the pillow, which you u&#383;ed to tell
+me I was churli&#383;h about; but all would
+not do.&mdash;I took neverthele&#383;s my walk
+before breakfa&#383;t, though the weather
+was not very inviting&mdash;and here I am,
+wi&#383;hing you a finer day, and &#383;eeing you
+peep over my &#383;houlder, as I write, with
+one of your kinde&#383;t looks&mdash;when your<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-46_S" id="CPg_3-46_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-46.png">46</a>]</span>
+eyes gli&#383;ten, and a &#383;uffu&#383;ion creeps over
+your relaxing features.</p>
+
+<p>But I do not mean to dally with you
+this morning&mdash;So God ble&#383;s you! Take
+care of your&#383;elf&mdash;and &#383;ometimes fold to
+your heart your affectionate</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XIX</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">DO</span> not call me &#383;tupid, for leaving
+on the table the little bit of paper I was
+to inclo&#383;e.&mdash;This comes of being in
+love at the fag-end of a letter of bu&#383;ine&#383;s.&mdash;You
+know, you &#383;ay, they will
+not chime together.&mdash;I had got you by
+the fire-&#383;ide, with the <i>gigot</i> &#383;moking on
+the board, to lard your poor bare ribs&mdash;and
+behold, I clo&#383;ed my letter with<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-47_S" id="CPg_3-47_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-47.png">47</a>]</span>out
+taking the paper up, that was directly
+under my eyes!&mdash;What had I got
+in them to render me &#383;o blind?&mdash;I give
+you leave to an&#383;wer the que&#383;tion, if you
+will not &#383;cold; for I am</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours mo&#383;t affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday, Augu&#383;t 17.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>I have promi&#383;ed &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; to go with
+him to his country-hou&#383;e, where he is
+now permitted to dine&mdash;I, and the little
+darling, to be &#383;ure<a name="FNanchor_47-A_15_S" id="CFNanchor_47-A_15_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_47-A_15_S" class="fnanchor">[47-A]</a>&mdash;whom I cannot<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-48_S" id="CPg_3-48_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+help ki&#383;&#383;ing with more fondne&#383;s, &#383;ince
+you left us. I think I &#383;hall enjoy the
+fine pro&#383;pect, and that it will rather
+enliven, than &#383;atiate my imagination.</p>
+
+<p>I have called on Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. She
+has the manners of a gentlewoman,
+with a da&#383;h of the ea&#383;y French coquetry,
+which renders her <i>piquante</i>.&mdash;But <i>Mon&#383;ieur</i>
+her hu&#383;band, whom nature never
+dreamed of ca&#383;ting in either the mould
+of a gentleman or lover, makes but an
+aukward figure in the foreground of
+the picture.</p>
+
+<p>The H&mdash;&mdash;s are very ugly, without
+doubt&mdash;and the hou&#383;e &#383;melt of commerce
+from top to toe&mdash;&#383;o that his
+abortive attempt to di&#383;play ta&#383;te, only
+proved it to be one of the things not to
+be bought with gold. I was in a room
+a moment alone, and my attention was
+attracted by the <i>pendule</i>&mdash;A nymph was<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-49_S" id="CPg_3-49_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+offering up her vows before a &#383;moking
+altar, to a fat-bottomed Cupid (&#383;aving
+your pre&#383;ence), who was kicking his
+heels in the air.&mdash;Ah! kick on, thought
+I; for the demon of traffic will ever
+fright away the loves and graces, that
+&#383;treak with the ro&#383;y beams of infant
+fancy the <i>&#383;ombre</i> day of life&mdash;whil&#383;t the
+imagination, not allowing us to &#383;ee
+things as they are, enables us to catch
+a ha&#383;ty draught of the running &#383;tream
+of delight, the thir&#383;t for which &#383;eems to
+be given only to tantalize us.</p>
+
+<p>But I am philo&#383;ophizing; nay, perhaps
+you will call me &#383;evere, and bid
+me let the &#383;quare-headed money-getters
+alone.&mdash;Peace to them! though none
+of the &#383;ocial &#383;prites (and there are not a
+few of different de&#383;criptions, who &#383;port
+about the various inlets to my heart)
+gave me a twitch to re&#383;train my pen.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-50_S" id="CPg_3-50_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-50.png">50</a>]</span>
+I have been writing on, expecting
+poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; to come; for, when I
+began, I merely thought of bu&#383;ine&#383;s;
+and, as this is the idea that mo&#383;t naturally
+a&#383;&#383;ociates with your image, I wonder
+I &#383;tumbled on any other.</p>
+
+<p>Yet, as common life, in my opinion,
+is &#383;carcely worth having, even with a
+<i>gigot</i> every day, and a pudding added
+thereunto, I will allow you to cultivate
+my judgment, if you will permit me to
+keep alive the &#383;entiments in your heart,
+which may be termed romantic, becau&#383;e,
+the off&#383;pring of the &#383;en&#383;es and
+the imagination, they re&#383;emble the
+mother more than the father<a name="FNanchor_50-A_16_S" id="CFNanchor_50-A_16_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_50-A_16_S" class="fnanchor">[50-A]</a>, when
+they produce the &#383;uffu&#383;ion I admire.&mdash;In
+&#383;pite of icy age, I hope &#383;till to &#383;ee it,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-51_S" id="CPg_3-51_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-51.png">51</a>]</span>
+if you have not determined only to
+eat and drink, and be &#383;tupidly u&#383;eful
+to the &#383;tupid&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">H&mdash;, Augu&#383;t 19, Tue&#383;day.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I received</span> both your letters to-day&mdash;I
+had reckoned on hearing from you
+ye&#383;terday, therefore was di&#383;appointed,
+though I imputed your &#383;ilence to the
+right cau&#383;e. I intended an&#383;wering
+your kind letter immediately, that you
+might have felt the plea&#383;ure it gave
+me; but &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; came in, and &#383;ome<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-52_S" id="CPg_3-52_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-52.png">52</a>]</span>
+other things interrupted me; &#383;o that
+the fine vapour has evaporated&mdash;yet,
+leaving a &#383;weet &#383;cent behind, I have
+only to tell you, what is &#383;ufficiently
+obvious, that the earne&#383;t de&#383;ire I have
+&#383;hown to keep my place, or gain more
+ground in your heart, is a &#383;ure proof
+how nece&#383;&#383;ary your affection is to my
+happine&#383;s.&mdash;Still I do not think it fal&#383;e
+delicacy, or fooli&#383;h pride, to wi&#383;h that
+your attention to my happine&#383;s &#383;hould
+ari&#383;e <i>as much</i> from love, which is always
+rather a &#383;elfi&#383;h pa&#383;&#383;ion, as rea&#383;on&mdash;that
+is, I want you to promote my
+felicity, by &#383;eeking your own.&mdash;For,
+whatever plea&#383;ure it may give me to
+di&#383;cover your genero&#383;ity of &#383;oul, I
+would not be dependent for your affection
+on the very quality I mo&#383;t admire.
+No; there are qualities in your
+heart, which demand my affection;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-53_S" id="CPg_3-53_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-53.png">53</a>]</span>
+but, unle&#383;s the attachment appears to
+me clearly mutual, I &#383;hall labour only
+to e&#383;teem your character, in&#383;tead of
+cheri&#383;hing a tenderne&#383;s for your per&#383;on.</p>
+
+<p>I write in a hurry, becau&#383;e the little
+one, who has been &#383;leeping a long time,
+begins to call for me. Poor thing!
+when I am &#383;ad, I lament that all my
+affections grow on me, till they become
+too &#383;trong for my peace, though they
+all afford me &#383;natches of exqui&#383;ite enjoyment&mdash;This
+for our little girl was at
+fir&#383;t very rea&#383;onable&mdash;more the effect
+of rea&#383;on, a &#383;en&#383;e of duty, than feeling&mdash;now,
+&#383;he has got into my heart
+and imagination, and when I walk out
+without her, her little figure is ever
+dancing before me.</p>
+
+<p>You too have &#383;omehow clung round
+my heart&mdash;I found I could not eat my<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-54_S" id="CPg_3-54_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-54.png">54</a>]</span>
+dinner in the great room&mdash;and, when
+I took up the large knife to carve for
+my&#383;elf, tears ru&#383;hed into my eyes.&mdash;Do
+not however &#383;uppo&#383;e that I am melancholy&mdash;for,
+when you are from me,
+I not only wonder how I can find fault
+with you&mdash;but how I can doubt your
+affection.</p>
+
+<p>I will not mix any comments on the
+inclo&#383;ed (it rou&#383;ed my indignation)
+with the effu&#383;ion of tenderne&#383;s, with
+which I a&#383;&#383;ure you, that you are the
+friend of my bo&#383;om, and the prop of my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-55_S" id="CPg_3-55_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-55.png">55</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">H&mdash;, Augu&#383;t 20.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I want</span> to know what &#383;teps you
+have taken re&#383;pecting &mdash;&mdash;. Knavery
+always rou&#383;es my indignation&mdash;I &#383;hould
+be gratified to hear that the law had
+cha&#383;ti&#383;ed &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; &#383;everely; but I do not
+wi&#383;h you to &#383;ee him, becau&#383;e the bu&#383;ine&#383;s
+does not now admit of peaceful
+di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ion, and I do not exactly know
+how you would expre&#383;s your contempt.</p>
+
+<p>Pray a&#383;k &#383;ome que&#383;tions about Tallien&mdash;I
+am &#383;till plea&#383;ed with the dignity
+of his conduct.&mdash;The other day, in the
+cau&#383;e of humanity, he made u&#383;e of a
+degree of addre&#383;s, which I admire<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-56_S" id="CPg_3-56_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-56.png">56</a>]</span>&mdash;and
+mean to point out to you, as one
+of the few in&#383;tances of addre&#383;s which
+do credit to the abilities of the man,
+without taking away from that confidence
+in his openne&#383;s of heart, which
+is the true ba&#383;is of both public and
+private friend&#383;hip.</p>
+
+<p>Do not &#383;uppo&#383;e that I mean to allude
+to a little re&#383;erve of temper in you,
+of which I have &#383;ometimes complained!
+You have been u&#383;ed to a
+cunning woman, and you almo&#383;t look
+for cunning&mdash;Nay, in <i>managing</i> my
+happine&#383;s, you now and then wounded
+my &#383;en&#383;ibility, concealing your&#383;elf, till
+hone&#383;t &#383;ympathy, giving you to me
+without di&#383;gui&#383;e, lets me look into a
+heart, which my half-broken one wi&#383;hes
+to creep into, to be revived and
+cheri&#383;hed.&mdash;&mdash;You have frankne&#383;s of
+heart, but not often exactly that over<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-57_S" id="CPg_3-57_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-57.png">57</a>]</span>flowing
+(<i>&eacute;panchement de c&oelig;ur</i>), which
+becoming almo&#383;t childi&#383;h, appears a
+weakne&#383;s only to the weak.</p>
+
+<p>But I have left poor Tallien. I
+wanted you to enquire likewi&#383;e whether,
+as a member declared in the convention,
+Robe&#383;pierre really maintained
+a <i>number</i> of mi&#383;tre&#383;&#383;es.&mdash;Should it prove
+&#383;o, I &#383;u&#383;pect that they rather flattered
+his vanity than his &#383;en&#383;es.</p>
+
+<p>Here is a chatting, de&#383;ultory epi&#383;tle!
+But do not &#383;uppo&#383;e that I mean to
+clo&#383;e it without mentioning the little
+dam&#383;el&mdash;who has been almo&#383;t &#383;pringing
+out of my arm&mdash;&#383;he certainly looks
+very like you&mdash;but I do not love her
+the le&#383;s for that, whether I am angry
+or plea&#383;ed with you.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-58_S" id="CPg_3-58_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-58.png">58</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXIII<a name="FNanchor_58-A_17_S" id="CFNanchor_58-A_17_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_58-A_17_S" class="fnanchor">[58-A]</a>.</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 22.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t written two letters, that
+are going by other conveyances, and
+which I reckon on your receiving long
+before this. I therefore merely write,
+becau&#383;e I know I &#383;hould be di&#383;appointed
+at &#383;eeing any one who had left you,
+if you did not &#383;end a letter, were it ever
+&#383;o &#383;hort, to tell me why you did not
+write a longer&mdash;and you will want to
+be told, over and over again, that our
+little Hercules is quite recovered.</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-59_S" id="CPg_3-59_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-59.png">59</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Be&#383;ides looking at me, there are
+three other things, which delight her&mdash;to
+ride in a coach, to look at a &#383;carlet
+wai&#383;tcoat, and hear loud mu&#383;ic&mdash;ye&#383;terday,
+at the <i>f&ecirc;te</i>, &#383;he enjoyed the two
+latter; but, to honour J. J. Rou&#383;&#383;eau,
+I intend to give her a &#383;a&#383;h, the fir&#383;t &#383;he
+has ever had round her&mdash;and why not?&mdash;for
+I have always been half in love
+with him.</p>
+
+<p>Well, this you will &#383;ay is trifling&mdash;&#383;hall
+I talk about alum or &#383;oap? There
+is nothing picture&#383;que in your pre&#383;ent
+pur&#383;uits; my imagination then rather
+chu&#383;es to ramble back to the barrier
+with you, or to &#383;ee you coming to
+meet me, and my ba&#383;ket of grapes.&mdash;With
+what plea&#383;ure do I recollect your
+looks and words, when I have been
+&#383;itting on the window, regarding the
+waving corn!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-60_S" id="CPg_3-60_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-60.png">60</a>]</span>
+Believe me, &#383;age &#383;ir, you have not
+&#383;ufficient re&#383;pect for the imagination&mdash;I
+could prove to you in a trice that it is
+the mother of &#383;entiment, the great
+di&#383;tinction of our nature, the only purifier
+of the pa&#383;&#383;ions&mdash;animals have a
+portion of rea&#383;on, and equal, if not
+more exqui&#383;ite, &#383;en&#383;es; but no trace of
+imagination, or her off&#383;pring ta&#383;te, appears
+in any of their actions. The impul&#383;e
+of the &#383;en&#383;es, pa&#383;&#383;ions, if you will,
+and the conclu&#383;ions of rea&#383;on, draw
+men together; but the imagination is
+the true fire, &#383;tolen from heaven, to
+animate this cold creature of clay, producing
+all tho&#383;e fine &#383;ympathies that
+lead to rapture, rendering men &#383;ocial
+by expanding their hearts, in&#383;tead of
+leaving them lei&#383;ure to calculate how
+many comforts &#383;ociety affords.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-61_S" id="CPg_3-61_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-61.png">61</a>]</span>
+If you call the&#383;e ob&#383;ervations romantic,
+a phra&#383;e in this place which would
+be tantamount to non&#383;en&#383;ical, I &#383;hall
+be apt to retort, that you are embruted
+by trade, and the vulgar enjoyments of
+life&mdash;Bring me then back your barrier-face,
+or you &#383;hall have nothing to &#383;ay
+to my barrier-girl; and I &#383;hall fly from
+you, to cheri&#383;h the remembrances that
+will ever be dear to me; for I am
+yours truly</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-62_S" id="CPg_3-62_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-62.png">62</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Evening, Sept. 23.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been playing and laughing
+with the little girl &#383;o long, that I cannot
+take up my pen to addre&#383;s you
+without emotion. Pre&#383;&#383;ing her to my
+bo&#383;om, &#383;he looked &#383;o like you (<i>entre
+nous</i>, your be&#383;t looks, for I do not admire
+your commercial face) every nerve
+&#383;eemed to vibrate to the touch, and I
+began to think that there was &#383;omething
+in the a&#383;&#383;ertion of man and wife
+being one&mdash;for you &#383;eemed to pervade
+my whole frame, quickening the beat
+of my heart, and lending me the &#383;ympathetic
+tears you excited.</p>
+
+<p>Have I any thing more to &#383;ay to you?
+No; not for the pre&#383;ent&mdash;the re&#383;t is all<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-63_S" id="CPg_3-63_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-63.png">63</a>]</span>
+flown away; and, indulging tenderne&#383;s
+for you, I cannot now complain of
+&#383;ome people here, who have ruffled my
+temper for two or three days pa&#383;t.</p>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p class="right">Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Ye&#383;terday</span> B&mdash;&mdash; &#383;ent to me for
+my packet of letters. He called on me
+before; and I like him better than I
+did&mdash;that is, I have the &#383;ame opinion
+of his under&#383;tanding, but I think with
+you, he has more tenderne&#383;s and real
+delicacy of feeling with re&#383;pect to women,
+than are commonly to be met with.
+His manner too of &#383;peaking of his little
+girl, about the age of mine, intere&#383;ted
+me. I gave him a letter for my &#383;i&#383;ter,
+and reque&#383;ted him to &#383;ee her.</p>
+
+<p>I have been interrupted. Mr. &mdash;&mdash;
+I &#383;uppo&#383;e will write about bu&#383;ine&#383;s.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-64_S" id="CPg_3-64_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+Public affairs I do not de&#383;cant on, except
+to tell you that they write now
+with great freedom and truth, and this
+liberty of the pre&#383;s will overthrow the
+Jacobins, I plainly perceive.</p>
+
+<p>I hope you take care of your health.
+I have got a habit of re&#383;tle&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s at
+night, which ari&#383;es, I believe, from
+activity of mind; for, when I am alone,
+that is, not near one to whom I can
+open my heart, I &#383;ink into reveries and
+trains of thinking, which agitate and
+fatigue me.</p>
+
+<p>This is my third letter; when am I
+to hear from you? I need not tell you,
+I &#383;uppo&#383;e, that I am now writing with
+&#383;omebody in the room with me, and
+&mdash;&mdash; is waiting to carry this to Mr.
+&mdash;&mdash;'s. I will then ki&#383;s the girl for
+you, and bid you adieu.</p>
+
+<p>I de&#383;ired you, in one of my other<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-65_S" id="CPg_3-65_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-65.png">65</a>]</span>
+letters, to bring back to me your barrier-face&mdash;or
+that you &#383;hould not be
+loved by my barrier-girl. I know that
+you will love her more and more, for
+&#383;he is a little affectionate, intelligent
+creature, with as much vivacity, I
+&#383;hould think, as you could wi&#383;h for.</p>
+
+<p>I was going to tell you of two or
+three things which di&#383;plea&#383;e me here;
+but they are not of &#383;ufficient con&#383;equence
+to interrupt plea&#383;ing &#383;en&#383;ations.
+I have received a letter from
+Mr. &mdash;&mdash;. I want you to bring &mdash;&mdash;
+with you. Madame S&mdash;&mdash; is by me,
+reading a German tran&#383;lation of your
+letters&mdash;&#383;he de&#383;ires me to give her love
+to you, on account of what you &#383;ay of
+the negroes.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours mo&#383;t affectionately, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-66_S" id="CPg_3-66_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-66.png">66</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Paris, Sept. 28.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> written to you three or four
+letters; but different cau&#383;es have prevented
+my &#383;ending them by the per&#383;ons
+who promi&#383;ed to take or forward them.
+The inclo&#383;ed is one I wrote to go by
+B&mdash;&mdash;; yet, finding that he will not
+arrive, before I hope, and believe, you
+will have &#383;et out on your return, I
+inclo&#383;e it to you, and &#383;hall give it in
+charge to &mdash;&mdash;, as Mr. &mdash;&mdash; is detained,
+to whom I al&#383;o gave a letter.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot help being anxious to hear
+from you; but I &#383;hall not harra&#383;s you
+with accounts of inquietudes, or of
+cares that ari&#383;e from peculiar circum&#383;tances.&mdash;I
+have had &#383;o many little<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-67_S" id="CPg_3-67_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-67.png">67</a>]</span>
+plagues here, that I have almo&#383;t lamented
+that I left H&mdash;&mdash;. &mdash;&mdash;, who
+is at be&#383;t a mo&#383;t helple&#383;s creature, is
+now, on account of her pregnancy,
+more trouble than u&#383;e to me, &#383;o that I
+&#383;till continue to be almo&#383;t a &#383;lave to the
+child.&mdash;She indeed rewards me, for
+&#383;he is a &#383;weet little creature; for, &#383;etting
+a&#383;ide a mother's fondne&#383;s (which,
+by the bye, is growing on me, her little
+intelligent &#383;miles &#383;inking into my heart),
+&#383;he has an a&#383;toni&#383;hing degree of &#383;en&#383;ibility
+and ob&#383;ervation. The other day
+by B&mdash;&mdash;'s child, a fine one, &#383;he looked
+like a little &#383;prite.&mdash;She is all life and
+motion, and her eyes are not the eyes
+of a fool&mdash;I will &#383;wear.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;lept at St. Germain's, in the very
+room (if you have not forgot) in which
+you pre&#383;&#383;ed me very tenderly to your
+heart.&mdash;I did not forget to fold my<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-68_S" id="CPg_3-68_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-68.png">68</a>]</span>
+darling to mine, with &#383;en&#383;ations that
+are almo&#383;t too &#383;acred to be alluded to.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu, my love! Take care of your&#383;elf,
+if you wi&#383;h to be the protector of
+your child, and the comfort of her
+mother.</p>
+
+<p>I have received, for you, letters from
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. I want to hear how that
+affair fini&#383;hes, though I do not know
+whether I have mo&#383;t contempt for his
+folly or knavery.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Your own &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-69_S" id="CPg_3-69_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-69.png">69</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">October 1.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is a heartle&#383;s ta&#383;k to write letters,
+without knowing whether they will
+ever reach you.&mdash;I have given two to
+&mdash;&mdash;, who has been a-going, a-going,
+every day, for a week pa&#383;t; and three
+others, which were written in a low-&#383;pirited
+&#383;train, a little querulous or &#383;o,
+I have not been able to forward by the
+opportunities that were mentioned to
+me. <i>Tant mieux!</i> you will &#383;ay, and I
+will not &#383;ay nay; for I &#383;hould be &#383;orry
+that the contents of a letter, when you
+are &#383;o far away, &#383;hould damp the plea&#383;ure
+that the &#383;ight of it would afford&mdash;judging
+of your feelings by my own.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-70_S" id="CPg_3-70_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-70.png">70</a>]</span>
+I ju&#383;t now &#383;tumbled on one of the kind
+letters, which you wrote during your
+la&#383;t ab&#383;ence. You are then a dear
+affectionate creature, and I will not
+plague you. The letter which you
+chance to receive, when the ab&#383;ence is
+&#383;o long, ought to bring only tears of
+tenderne&#383;s, without any bitter alloy,
+into your eyes.</p>
+
+<p>After your return I hope indeed,
+that you will not be &#383;o immer&#383;ed in
+bu&#383;ine&#383;s, as during the la&#383;t three or
+four months pa&#383;t&mdash;for even money, taking
+into the account all the future comforts
+it is to procure, may be gained at
+too dear a rate, if painful impre&#383;&#383;ions
+are left on the mind.&mdash;The&#383;e impre&#383;&#383;ions
+were much more lively, &#383;oon after
+you went away, than at pre&#383;ent&mdash;for a
+thou&#383;and tender recollections efface the
+melancholy traces they left on my mind<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-71_S" id="CPg_3-71_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-71.png">71</a>]</span>&mdash;and
+every emotion is on the &#383;ame &#383;ide
+as my rea&#383;on, which always was on
+yours.&mdash;Separated, it would be almo&#383;t
+impious to dwell on real or imaginary
+imperfections of character.&mdash;I feel that
+I love you; and, if I cannot be happy
+with you, I will &#383;eek it no where el&#383;e.</p>
+
+<p>My little darling grows every day
+more dear to me&mdash;and &#383;he often has a
+ki&#383;s, when we are alone together,
+which I give her for you, with all my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>I have been interrupted&mdash;and mu&#383;t
+&#383;end off my letter. The liberty of the
+pre&#383;s will produce a great effect here&mdash;the
+<i>cry of blood will not be vain</i>!&mdash;Some
+more mon&#383;ters will peri&#383;h&mdash;and the
+Jacobins are conquered.&mdash;Yet I almo&#383;t
+fear the la&#383;t &#383;lap of the tail of the
+bea&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>I have had &#383;everal trifling teazing<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-72_S" id="CPg_3-72_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-72.png">72</a>]</span>
+inconveniencies here, which I &#383;hall not
+now trouble you with a detail of.&mdash;I
+am &#383;ending &mdash;&mdash; back; her pregnancy
+rendered her u&#383;ele&#383;s. The girl I have
+got has more vivacity, which is better
+for the child.</p>
+
+<p>I long to hear from you.&mdash;Bring a
+copy of &mdash;&mdash; and &mdash;&mdash; with you.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; is &#383;till here: he is a lo&#383;t man.&mdash;He
+really loves his wife, and is anxious
+about his children; but his indi&#383;criminate
+ho&#383;pitality and &#383;ocial feelings have
+given him an inveterate habit of drinking,
+that de&#383;troys his health, as well as
+renders his per&#383;on di&#383;gu&#383;ting.&mdash;If his
+wife had more &#383;en&#383;e, or delicacy, &#383;he
+might re&#383;train him: as it is, nothing
+will &#383;ave him.</p>
+
+<p>Yours mo&#383;t truly and affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-73_S" id="CPg_3-73_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-73.png">73</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">October 26.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> dear love, I began to wi&#383;h &#383;o earne&#383;tly
+to hear from you, that the &#383;ight
+of your letters occa&#383;ioned &#383;uch plea&#383;urable
+emotions, I was obliged to throw
+them a&#383;ide till the little girl and I were
+alone together; and this &#383;aid little girl,
+our darling, is become a mo&#383;t intelligent
+little creature, and as gay as a lark,
+and that in the morning too, which I
+do not find quite &#383;o convenient. I
+once told you, that the &#383;en&#383;ations before
+&#383;he was born, and when &#383;he is
+&#383;ucking, were plea&#383;ant; but they do
+not de&#383;erve to be compared to the emotions
+I feel, when &#383;he &#383;tops to &#383;mile<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-74_S" id="CPg_3-74_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-74.png">74</a>]</span>
+upon me, or laughs outright on meeting
+me unexpectedly in the &#383;treet, or
+after a &#383;hort ab&#383;ence. She has now the
+advantage of having two good nur&#383;es,
+and I am at pre&#383;ent able to di&#383;charge
+my duty to her, without being the
+&#383;lave of it.</p>
+
+<p>I have therefore employed and amu&#383;ed
+my&#383;elf &#383;ince I got rid of &mdash;&mdash;, and am
+making a progre&#383;s in the language
+among&#383;t other things. I have al&#383;o made
+&#383;ome new acquaintance. I have almo&#383;t
+<i>charmed</i> a judge of the tribunal, R&mdash;&mdash;,
+who, though I &#383;hould not have thought
+it po&#383;&#383;ible, has humanity, if not <i>beaucoup
+d'e&#383;prit</i>. But let me tell you, if you do
+not make ha&#383;te back, I &#383;hall be half in
+love with the author of the <i>Mar&#383;eillai&#383;e</i>,
+who is a hand&#383;ome man, a little
+too broad-faced or &#383;o, and plays &#383;weetly
+on the violin.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-75_S" id="CPg_3-75_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-75.png">75</a>]</span>
+What do you &#383;ay to this threat?&mdash;why,
+<i>entre nous</i>, I like to give way to
+a &#383;prightly vein, when writing to you,
+that is, when I am plea&#383;ed with you.
+"The devil," you know, is proverbially
+&#383;aid to be "in a good humour, when
+he is plea&#383;ed." Will you not then be
+a good boy, and come back quickly to
+play with your girls? but I &#383;hall not allow
+you to love the new-comer be&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>My heart longs for your return, my
+love, and only looks for, and &#383;eeks happine&#383;s
+with you; yet do not imagine
+that I childi&#383;hly wi&#383;h you to come back,
+before you have arranged things in
+&#383;uch a manner, that it will not be nece&#383;&#383;ary
+for you to leave us &#383;oon again;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-76_S" id="CPg_3-76_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-76.png">76</a>]</span>
+or to make exertions which injure your
+con&#383;titution.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours mo&#383;t truly and tenderly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>P.S. "You would oblige me by delivering
+the inclo&#383;ed to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;, and
+pray call for an an&#383;wer.&mdash;It is for a per&#383;on
+uncomfortably &#383;ituated.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Dec. 26.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been, my love, for &#383;ome days
+tormented by fears, that I would not
+allow to a&#383;&#383;ume a form&mdash;I had been
+expecting you daily&mdash;and I heard that
+many ve&#383;&#383;els had been driven on &#383;hore
+during the late gale.&mdash;Well, I now &#383;ee<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-77_S" id="CPg_3-77_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-77.png">77</a>]</span>
+your letter&mdash;and find that you are &#383;afe;
+I will not regret then that your exertions
+have hitherto been &#383;o unavailing.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Be that as it may, return to me when
+you have arranged the other matters,
+which &mdash;&mdash; has been crowding on you.
+I want to be &#383;ure that you are &#383;afe&mdash;and
+not &#383;eparated from me by a &#383;ea that
+mu&#383;t be pa&#383;&#383;ed. For, feeling that I am
+happier than I ever was, do you wonder
+at my &#383;ometimes dreading that fate
+has not done per&#383;ecuting me? Come
+to me, my deare&#383;t friend, hu&#383;band, father
+of my child!&mdash;All the&#383;e fond ties
+glow at my heart at this moment, and
+dim my eyes.&mdash;With you an independence
+is de&#383;irable; and it is always
+within our reach, if affluence e&#383;capes<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-78_S" id="CPg_3-78_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-78.png">78</a>]</span>
+us&mdash;without you the world again appears
+empty to me. But I am recurring
+to &#383;ome of the melancholy thoughts
+that have flitted acro&#383;s my mind for
+&#383;ome days pa&#383;t, and haunted my
+dreams.</p>
+
+<p>My little darling is indeed a &#383;weet
+child; and I am &#383;orry that you are not
+here, to &#383;ee her little mind unfold it&#383;elf.
+You talk of "dalliance;" but certainly
+no lover was ever more attached to his
+mi&#383;tre&#383;s, than &#383;he is to me. Her eyes
+follow me every where, and by affection
+I have the mo&#383;t de&#383;potic power
+over her. She is all vivacity or &#383;oftne&#383;s&mdash;yes;
+I love her more than I
+thought I &#383;hould. When I have been
+hurt at your &#383;tay, I have embraced her
+as my only comfort&mdash;when plea&#383;ed with
+you, for looking and laughing like
+you; nay, I cannot, I find, long be an<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-79_S" id="CPg_3-79_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-79.png">79</a>]</span>gry
+with you, whil&#383;t I am ki&#383;&#383;ing her
+for re&#383;embling you. But there would
+be no end to the&#383;e details. Fold us
+both to your heart; for I am truly and
+affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">December 28.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>I do, my love, indeed &#383;incerely
+&#383;ympathize with you in all your di&#383;appointments.&mdash;Yet,
+knowing that you
+are well, and think of me with affec<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-80_S" id="CPg_3-80_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-80.png">80</a>]</span>tion,
+I only lament other di&#383;appointments,
+becau&#383;e I am &#383;orry that you
+&#383;hould thus exert your&#383;elf in vain, and
+that you are kept from me.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, I know, urges you to &#383;tay,
+and is continually branching out into
+new projects, becau&#383;e he has the idle
+de&#383;ire to ama&#383;s a large fortune, rather
+an immen&#383;e one, merely to have the
+credit of having made it. But we
+who are governed by other motives,
+ought not to be led on by him. When
+we meet, we will di&#383;cu&#383;s this &#383;ubject&mdash;You
+will li&#383;ten to rea&#383;on, and it has
+probably occurred to you, that it will
+be better, in future, to pur&#383;ue &#383;ome
+&#383;ober plan, which may demand more
+time, and &#383;till enable you to arrive at
+the &#383;ame end. It appears to me ab&#383;urd
+to wa&#383;te life in preparing to live.</p>
+
+<p>Would it not now be po&#383;&#383;ible to ar<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-81_S" id="CPg_3-81_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-81.png">81</a>]</span>range
+your bu&#383;ine&#383;s in &#383;uch a manner
+as to avoid the inquietudes, of which
+I have had my &#383;hare &#383;ince your departure?
+Is it not po&#383;&#383;ible to enter into
+bu&#383;ine&#383;s, as an employment nece&#383;&#383;ary
+to keep the faculties awake, and (to
+&#383;ink a little in the expre&#383;&#383;ions) the pot
+boiling, without &#383;uffering what mu&#383;t
+ever be con&#383;idered as a &#383;econdary object,
+to engro&#383;s the mind, and drive
+&#383;entiment and affection out of the
+heart?</p>
+
+<p>I am in a hurry to give this letter to
+the per&#383;on who has promi&#383;ed to forward
+it with &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s. I wi&#383;h then to
+counteract, in &#383;ome mea&#383;ure, what
+<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'he he'">he</ins> has doubtle&#383;s recommended mo&#383;t
+warmly.</p>
+
+<p>Stay, my friend, whil&#383;t it is <i>ab&#383;olutely</i>
+nece&#383;&#383;ary.&mdash;I will give you no tenderer
+name, though it glows at my heart,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-82_S" id="CPg_3-82_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+unle&#383;s you come the moment the &#383;ettling
+the <i>pre&#383;ent</i> objects permit.&mdash;<i>I do not
+con&#383;ent</i> to your taking any other journey&mdash;or
+the little woman and I will be
+off, the Lord knows where. But, as I
+had rather owe every thing to your affection,
+and, I may add, to your rea&#383;on,
+(for this immoderate de&#383;ire of
+wealth, which makes &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; &#383;o eager
+to have you remain, is contrary to your
+principles of action), I will not importune
+you.&mdash;I will only tell you, that I
+long to &#383;ee you&mdash;and, being at peace
+with you, I &#383;hall be hurt, rather than
+made angry, by delays.&mdash;Having &#383;uffered
+&#383;o much in life, do not be &#383;urpri&#383;ed
+if I &#383;ometimes, when left to
+my&#383;elf, grow gloomy, and &#383;uppo&#383;e that
+it was all a dream, and that my happine&#383;s
+is not to la&#383;t. I &#383;ay happine&#383;s,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-83_S" id="CPg_3-83_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-83.png">83</a>]</span>
+becau&#383;e remembrance retrenches all
+the dark &#383;hades of the picture.</p>
+
+<p>My little one begins to &#383;how her
+teeth, and u&#383;e her legs&mdash;She wants you
+to bear your part in the nur&#383;ing bu&#383;ine&#383;s,
+for I am fatigued with dancing
+her, and yet &#383;he is not &#383;ati&#383;fied&mdash;&#383;he
+wants you to thank her mother for taking
+&#383;uch care of her, as you only can.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">December 29.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Though</span> I &#383;uppo&#383;e you have later
+intelligence, yet, as &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has ju&#383;t
+informed me that he has an opportuni<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-84_S" id="CPg_3-84_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-84.png">84</a>]</span>ty
+of &#383;ending immediately to you, I
+take advantage of it to inclo&#383;e you</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>How I hate this crooked bu&#383;ine&#383;s!
+This intercour&#383;e with the world, which
+obliges one to &#383;ee the wor&#383;t &#383;ide of
+human nature! Why cannot you be
+content with the object you had fir&#383;t in
+view, when you entered into this weari&#383;ome
+labyrinth?&mdash;I know very well
+that you have imperceptibly been
+drawn on; yet why does one project,
+&#383;ucce&#383;&#383;ful or abortive, only give place
+to two others? Is it not &#383;ufficient to
+avoid poverty?&mdash;I am contented to do
+my part; and, even here, &#383;ufficient to
+e&#383;cape from wretchedne&#383;s is not difficult
+to obtain. And, let me tell you,
+I have my project al&#383;o&mdash;and, if you do
+not &#383;oon return, the little girl and I
+will take care of our&#383;elves; we will not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-85_S" id="CPg_3-85_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-85.png">85</a>]</span>
+accept any of your cold kindne&#383;s&mdash;your
+di&#383;tant civilities&mdash;no; not we.</p>
+
+<p>This is but half je&#383;ting, for I am
+really tormented by the de&#383;ire which
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; manife&#383;ts to have you remain
+where you are.&mdash;Yet why do I talk to
+you?&mdash;If he can per&#383;uade you&mdash;let him!&mdash;for,
+if you are not happier with me,
+and your own wi&#383;hes do not make you
+throw a&#383;ide the&#383;e eternal projects, I am
+above u&#383;ing any arguments, though
+rea&#383;on as well as affection &#383;eems to offer
+them&mdash;if our affection be mutual,
+they will occur to you&mdash;and you will
+act accordingly.</p>
+
+<p>Since my arrival here, I have found
+the German lady, of whom you have
+heard me &#383;peak. Her fir&#383;t child died
+in the month; but &#383;he has another,
+about the age of my &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, a fine
+little creature. They are &#383;till but con<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-86_S" id="CPg_3-86_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-86.png">86</a>]</span>triving
+to live&mdash;&mdash;earning their daily
+bread&mdash;yet, though they are but ju&#383;t
+above poverty, I envy them.&mdash;She is a
+tender, affectionate mother&mdash;fatigued
+even by her attention.&mdash;However &#383;he
+has an affectionate hu&#383;band in her turn,
+to render her care light, and to &#383;hare
+her plea&#383;ure.</p>
+
+<p>I will own to you that, feeling extreme
+tenderne&#383;s for my little girl, I
+grow &#383;ad very often when I am playing
+with her, that you are not here, to
+ob&#383;erve with me how her mind unfolds,
+and her little heart becomes attached!&mdash;The&#383;e
+appear to me to be true plea&#383;ures&mdash;and
+&#383;till you &#383;uffer them to e&#383;cape
+you, in &#383;earch of what we may
+never enjoy.&mdash;It is your own maxim to
+"live in the pre&#383;ent moment."&mdash;<i>If you
+do</i>&mdash;&#383;tay, for God's &#383;ake; but tell me
+the truth&mdash;if not, tell me when I may<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-87_S" id="CPg_3-87_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+expect to &#383;ee you, and let me not be
+always vainly looking for you, till I
+grow &#383;ick at heart.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! I am a little hurt.&mdash;I mu&#383;t
+take my darling to my bo&#383;om to comfort
+me.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">December 30.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Should</span> you receive three or four of
+the letters at once which I have written
+lately, do not think of Sir John
+Brute, for I do not mean to wife you.
+I only take advantage of every occa&#383;ion,
+that one out of three of my
+epi&#383;tles may reach your hands, and in<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-88_S" id="CPg_3-88_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-88.png">88</a>]</span>form
+you that I am not of &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+opinion, who talks till he makes me
+angry, of the nece&#383;&#383;ity of your &#383;taying
+two or three months longer. I do not
+like this life of continual inquietude&mdash;and,
+<i>entre nous</i>, I am determined to try
+to earn &#383;ome money here my&#383;elf, in
+order to convince you that, if you
+chu&#383;e to run about the world to get a
+fortune, it is for your&#383;elf&mdash;for the little
+girl and I will live without your a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance,
+unle&#383;s you are with us. I may
+be termed proud&mdash;Be it &#383;o&mdash;but I will
+never abandon certain principles of
+action.</p>
+
+<p>The common run of men have &#383;uch
+an ignoble way of thinking, that, if
+they debauch their hearts, and pro&#383;titute
+their per&#383;ons, following perhaps a
+gu&#383;t of inebriation, they &#383;uppo&#383;e the
+wife, &#383;lave rather, whom they main<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-89_S" id="CPg_3-89_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-89.png">89</a>]</span>tain,
+has no right to complain, and
+ought to receive the &#383;ultan, whenever
+he deigns to return, with open arms,
+though his have been polluted by half
+an hundred promi&#383;cuous amours during
+his ab&#383;ence.</p>
+
+<p>I con&#383;ider fidelity and con&#383;tancy as
+two di&#383;tinct things; yet the former is
+nece&#383;&#383;ary, to give life to the other&mdash;and
+&#383;uch a degree of re&#383;pect do I think
+due to my&#383;elf, that, if only probity,
+which is a good thing in its place,
+brings you back, never return!&mdash;for,
+if a wandering of the heart, or even a
+caprice of the imagination detains
+you&mdash;there is an end of all my hopes of
+happine&#383;s&mdash;I could not forgive it, if I
+would.</p>
+
+<p>I have gotten into a melancholy
+mood, you perceive. You know my
+opinion of men in general; you know<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-90_S" id="CPg_3-90_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-90.png">90</a>]</span>
+that I think them &#383;y&#383;tematic tyrants, and
+that it is the rare&#383;t thing in the world,
+to meet with a man with &#383;ufficient
+delicacy of feeling to govern de&#383;ire.
+When I am thus &#383;ad, I lament that my
+little darling, fondly as I doat on her,
+is a girl.&mdash;I am &#383;orry to have a tie to a
+world that for me is ever &#383;own with
+thorns.</p>
+
+<p>You will call this an ill-humoured
+letter, when, in fact, it is the &#383;tronge&#383;t
+proof of affection I can give, to dread
+to lo&#383;e you. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has taken &#383;uch
+pains to convince me that you mu&#383;t
+and ought to &#383;tay, that it has inconceivably
+depre&#383;&#383;ed my &#383;pirits&mdash;You
+have always known my opinion&mdash;I have
+ever declared, that two people, who
+mean to live together, ought not to be
+long &#383;eparated.&mdash;If certain things are
+more nece&#383;&#383;ary to you than me&mdash;&#383;earch<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-91_S" id="CPg_3-91_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-91.png">91</a>]</span>
+for them&mdash;Say but one word, and you
+&#383;hall never hear of me more.&mdash;If not&mdash;for
+God's &#383;ake, let us &#383;truggle with
+poverty&mdash;with any evil, but the&#383;e continual
+inquietudes of bu&#383;ine&#383;s, which
+I have been told were to la&#383;t but a few
+months, though every day the end appears
+more di&#383;tant! This is the fir&#383;t
+letter in this &#383;train that I have determined
+to forward to you; the re&#383;t lie
+by, becau&#383;e I was unwilling to give you
+pain, and I &#383;hould not now write, if I
+did not think that there would be no
+conclu&#383;ion to the &#383;chemes, which demand,
+as I am told, your pre&#383;ence.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *<a name="FNanchor_91-A_18_S" id="CFNanchor_91-A_18_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_91-A_18_S" class="fnanchor">[91-A]</a></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-92_S" id="CPg_3-92_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-92.png">92</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXXII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">January 9.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I ju&#383;t</span> now received one of your
+ha&#383;ty <i>notes</i>; for bu&#383;ine&#383;s &#383;o entirely occupies
+you, that you have not time, or
+&#383;ufficient command of thought, to write
+letters. Beware! you &#383;eem to be got
+into a whirl of projects and &#383;chemes,
+which are drawing you into a gulph,
+that, if it do not ab&#383;orb your happine&#383;s,
+will infallibly de&#383;troy mine.</p>
+
+<p>Fatigued during my youth by the
+mo&#383;t arduous &#383;truggles, not only to obtain
+independence, but to render my&#383;elf
+u&#383;eful, not merely plea&#383;ure, for
+which I had the mo&#383;t lively ta&#383;te, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-93_S" id="CPg_3-93_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-93.png">93</a>]</span>
+mean the &#383;imple plea&#383;ures that flow from
+pa&#383;&#383;ion and affection, e&#383;caped me, but
+the mo&#383;t melancholy views of life were
+impre&#383;&#383;ed by a di&#383;appointed heart on
+my mind. Since I knew you, I have
+been endeavouring to go back to my
+former nature, and have allowed &#383;ome
+time to glide away, winged with the
+delight which only &#383;pontaneous enjoyment
+can give.&mdash;Why have you &#383;o
+&#383;oon di&#383;&#383;olved the charm?</p>
+
+<p>I am really unable to bear the continual
+inquietude which your and
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s never-ending plans produce.
+This you may term want of firmne&#383;s&mdash;but
+you are mi&#383;taken&mdash;I have &#383;till &#383;ufficient
+firmne&#383;s to pur&#383;ue my principle
+of action. The pre&#383;ent mi&#383;ery, I cannot
+find a &#383;ofter word to do ju&#383;tice to
+my feelings, appears to me unnece&#383;<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-94_S" id="CPg_3-94_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-94.png">94</a>]</span>&#383;ary&mdash;and
+therefore I have not firmne&#383;s
+to &#383;upport it as you may think I
+ought. I &#383;hould have been content,
+and &#383;till wi&#383;h, to retire with you to a
+farm&mdash;My God! any thing, but the&#383;e
+continual anxieties&mdash;any thing but
+commerce, which deba&#383;es the mind,
+and roots out affection from the heart.</p>
+
+<p>I do not mean to complain of &#383;ubordinate
+inconveniences&mdash;&mdash;yet I will
+&#383;imply ob&#383;erve, that, led to expect
+you every week, I did not make the
+arrangements required by the pre&#383;ent
+circum&#383;tances, to procure the nece&#383;&#383;aries
+of life. In order to have them,
+a &#383;ervant, for that purpo&#383;e only, is indi&#383;pen&#383;ible&mdash;The
+want of wood, has made
+me catch the mo&#383;t violent cold I ever
+had; and my head is &#383;o di&#383;turbed by
+continual coughing, that I am unable<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-95_S" id="CPg_3-95_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+to write without &#383;topping frequently to
+recollect my&#383;elf.&mdash;This however is one
+of the common evils which mu&#383;t be
+borne with&mdash;&mdash;bodily pain does not
+touch the heart, though it fatigues the
+&#383;pirits.</p>
+
+<p>Still as you talk of your return, even
+in February, doubtingly, I have determined,
+the moment the weather
+changes, to wean my child.&mdash;It is too
+&#383;oon for her to begin to divide &#383;orrow!&mdash;And
+as one has well &#383;aid, "de&#383;pair is a
+freeman," we will go and &#383;eek our fortune
+together.</p>
+
+<p>This is not a caprice of the moment&mdash;for
+your ab&#383;ence has given new
+weight to &#383;ome conclu&#383;ions, that I was
+very reluctantly forming before you
+left me.&mdash;I do not chu&#383;e to be a &#383;econdary
+object.&mdash;If your feelings were
+in uni&#383;on with mine, you would not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-96_S" id="CPg_3-96_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-96.png">96</a>]</span>
+&#383;acrifice &#383;o much to vi&#383;ionary pro&#383;pects
+of future advantage.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Jan. <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: added mi&#383;&#383;ing period">15.</ins></p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I was</span> ju&#383;t going to begin my letter
+with the fag end of a &#383;ong, which would
+only have told you, what I may as well
+&#383;ay &#383;imply, that it is plea&#383;ant to forgive
+tho&#383;e we love. I have received your
+two letters, dated the 26th and 28th
+of December, and my anger died away.
+You can &#383;carcely conceive the effect
+&#383;ome of your letters have produced on
+me. After longing to hear from you
+during a tedious interval of &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e,
+I have &#383;een a &#383;uper&#383;cription written by<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-97_S" id="CPg_3-97_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-97.png">97</a>]</span>
+you.&mdash;Promi&#383;ing my&#383;elf plea&#383;ure, and
+feeling emotion, I have laid it by me,
+till the per&#383;on who brought it, left the
+room&mdash;when, behold! on opening it,
+I have found only half a dozen ha&#383;ty
+lines, that have damped all the ri&#383;ing
+affection of my &#383;oul.</p>
+
+<p>Well, now for bu&#383;ine&#383;s&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>My animal is well; I have not yet
+taught her to eat, but nature is doing
+the bu&#383;ine&#383;s. I gave her a cru&#383;t to a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t
+the cutting of her teeth; and now
+&#383;he has two, &#383;he makes good u&#383;e of
+them to gnaw a cru&#383;t, bi&#383;cuit, &amp;c. You
+would laugh to &#383;ee her; &#383;he is ju&#383;t like
+a little &#383;quirrel; &#383;he will guard a cru&#383;t
+for two hours; and, after fixing her
+eye on an object for &#383;ome time, dart<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-98_S" id="CPg_3-98_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-98.png">98</a>]</span>
+on it with an aim as &#383;ure as a bird of
+prey&mdash;nothing can equal her life and
+&#383;pirits. I &#383;uffer from a cold; but it
+does not affect her. Adieu! do not
+forget to love us&mdash;and come &#383;oon to
+tell us that you do.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Jan. 30.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">From</span> the purport of your la&#383;t letters,
+I would &#383;uppo&#383;e that this will
+&#383;carcely reach you; and I have already
+written &#383;o many letters, that
+you have either not received, or neglected
+to acknowledge, I do not find
+it plea&#383;ant, or rather I have no inclination,
+to go over the &#383;ame ground<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-99_S" id="CPg_3-99_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-99.png">99</a>]</span>
+again. If you have received them, and
+are &#383;till detained by new projects, it is
+u&#383;ele&#383;s for me to &#383;ay any more on the
+&#383;ubject. I have done with it for ever<ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads '-'">&mdash;</ins>yet
+I ought to remind you that your pecuniary
+intere&#383;t &#383;uffers by your ab&#383;ence.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>For my part, my head is turned giddy,
+by only hearing of plans to make
+money, and my contemptuous feelings
+have &#383;ometimes bur&#383;t out. I therefore
+was glad that a violent cold gave me a
+pretext to &#383;tay at home, le&#383;t I &#383;hould
+have uttered un&#383;ea&#383;onable truths.</p>
+
+<p>My child is well, and the &#383;pring
+will perhaps re&#383;tore me to my&#383;elf.&mdash;I
+have endured many inconveniences<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-100_S" id="CPg_3-100_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-100.png">100</a>]</span>
+this winter, which &#383;hould I be a&#383;hamed
+to mention, if they had been unavoidable.
+"The &#383;econdary plea&#383;ures of life,"
+you &#383;ay, "are very nece&#383;&#383;ary to my comfort:"
+it may be &#383;o; but I have ever
+con&#383;idered them as &#383;econdary. If therefore
+you accu&#383;e me of wanting the re&#383;olution
+nece&#383;&#383;ary to bear the <i>common</i><a name="FNanchor_100-A_19_S" id="CFNanchor_100-A_19_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_100-A_19_S" class="fnanchor">[100-A]</a>
+evils of life; I &#383;hould an&#383;wer, that I
+have not fa&#383;hioned my mind to &#383;u&#383;tain
+them, becau&#383;e I would avoid them,
+co&#383;t what it would&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-101_S" id="CPg_3-101_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-101.png">101</a>]</span></p>
+
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">February 9.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> melancholy pre&#383;entiment has for
+&#383;ome time hung on my &#383;pirits, that we
+were parted for ever; and the letters I
+received this day, by Mr. &mdash;&mdash;, convince
+me that it was not without foundation.
+You allude to &#383;ome other
+letters, which I &#383;uppo&#383;e have mi&#383;carried;
+for mo&#383;t of tho&#383;e I have got, were
+only a few ha&#383;ty lines, calculated to
+wound the tenderne&#383;s the &#383;ight of the
+&#383;uper&#383;criptions excited.</p>
+
+<p>I mean not however to complain;
+yet &#383;o many feelings are &#383;truggling for
+utterance, and agitating a heart almo&#383;t
+bur&#383;ting with angui&#383;h, that I find it<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-102_S" id="CPg_3-102_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+very difficult to write with any degree
+of coherence.</p>
+
+<p>You left me indi&#383;po&#383;ed, though you
+have taken no notice of it; and the
+mo&#383;t fatiguing journey I ever had, contributed
+to continue it. However, I
+recovered my health; but a neglected
+cold, and continual inquietude during
+the la&#383;t two months, have reduced me
+to a &#383;tate of weakne&#383;s I never before
+experienced. Tho&#383;e who did not know
+that the canker-worm was at work at
+the core, cautioned me about &#383;uckling
+my child too long.&mdash;God pre&#383;erve this
+poor child, and render her happier
+than her mother!</p>
+
+<p>But I am wandering from my &#383;ubject:
+indeed my head turns giddy, when I
+think that all the confidence I have had
+in the affection of others is come to this.</p>
+
+<p>I did not expect this blow from you.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-103_S" id="CPg_3-103_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-103.png">103</a>]</span>
+I have done my duty to you and my
+child; and if I am not to have any
+return of affection to reward me, I
+have the &#383;ad con&#383;olation of knowing
+that I de&#383;erved a better fate. My
+&#383;oul is weary&mdash;I am &#383;ick at heart; and,
+but for this little darling, I would
+cea&#383;e to care about a life, which is now
+&#383;tripped of every charm.</p>
+
+<p>You &#383;ee how &#383;tupid I am, uttering
+declamation, when I meant &#383;imply to
+tell you, that I con&#383;ider your reque&#383;ting
+me to come to you, as merely dictated
+by honour.&mdash;Indeed, I &#383;carcely under&#383;tand
+you.&mdash;You reque&#383;t me to come,
+and then tell me, that you have not
+given up all thoughts of returning to
+this place.</p>
+
+<p>When I determined to live with you,
+I was only governed by affection.&mdash;I
+would &#383;hare poverty with you, but I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-104_S" id="CPg_3-104_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+turn with affright from the &#383;ea of trouble
+on which you are entering.&mdash;I have
+certain principles of action: I know
+what I look for to found my happine&#383;s
+on.&mdash;It is not money.&mdash;With you I
+wi&#383;hed for &#383;ufficient to procure the
+comforts of life&mdash;as it is, le&#383;s will
+do.&mdash;I can &#383;till exert my&#383;elf to
+obtain the nece&#383;&#383;aries of life for my
+child, and &#383;he does not want more at
+pre&#383;ent.&mdash;I have two or three plans in
+my head to earn our &#383;ub&#383;i&#383;tence; for
+do not &#383;uppo&#383;e that, neglected by you,
+I will lie under obligations of a pecuniary
+kind to you!&mdash;No; I would &#383;ooner
+&#383;ubmit to menial &#383;ervice.&mdash;I wanted the
+&#383;upport of your affection&mdash;that gone,
+all is over!&mdash;I did not think, when I
+complained of &mdash;&mdash;'s contemptible avidity
+to accumulate money, that he<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-105_S" id="CPg_3-105_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-105.png">105</a>]</span>
+would have dragged you into his
+&#383;chemes.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot write.&mdash;I inclo&#383;e a fragment
+of a letter, written &#383;oon after your
+departure, and another which tenderne&#383;s
+made me keep back when it was
+written.&mdash;You will &#383;ee then the &#383;entiments
+of a calmer, though not a more
+determined, moment.&mdash;Do not in&#383;ult
+me by &#383;aying, that "our being together
+is paramount to every other con&#383;ideration!"
+Were it, you would not be
+running after a bubble, at the expence
+of my peace of mind.</p>
+
+<p>Perhaps this is the la&#383;t letter you will
+ever receive from me.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-106_S" id="CPg_3-106_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-106.png">106</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XXXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Feb. 10.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> talk of "permanent views and
+future comfort"&mdash;not for me, for I am
+dead to hope. The inquietudes of the
+la&#383;t winter have fini&#383;hed the bu&#383;ine&#383;s,
+and my heart is not only broken, but
+my con&#383;titution de&#383;troyed. I conceive
+my&#383;elf in a galloping con&#383;umption, and
+the continual anxiety I feel at the
+thought of leaving my child, feeds the
+fever that nightly devours me. It is
+on her account that I again write to
+you, to conjure you, by all that you
+hold &#383;acred, to leave her here with the
+German lady you may have heard me
+mention! She has a child of the &#383;ame
+age, and they may be brought up to<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-107_S" id="CPg_3-107_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-107.png">107</a>]</span>gether,
+as I wi&#383;h her to be brought up.
+I &#383;hall write more fully on the &#383;ubject.
+To facilitate this, I &#383;hall give up my
+pre&#383;ent lodgings, and go into the &#383;ame
+hou&#383;e. I can live much cheaper there,
+which is now become an object. I have
+had 3000 livres from &mdash;&mdash;, and I &#383;hall
+take one more, to pay my &#383;ervant's
+wages, &amp;c. and then I &#383;hall endeavour
+to procure what I want by my own exertions.
+I &#383;hall entirely give up the acquaintance
+of the Americans.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; and I have not been on good
+terms a long time. Ye&#383;terday he very
+unmanlily exulted over me, on account
+of your determination to &#383;tay. I had
+provoked it, it is true, by &#383;ome a&#383;perities
+again&#383;t commerce, which have
+dropped from me, when we have argued
+about the propriety of your remaining
+where you are; and it is no matter, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-108_S" id="CPg_3-108_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-108.png">108</a>]</span>
+have drunk too deep of the bitter cup
+to care about trifles.</p>
+
+<p>When you fir&#383;t entered into the&#383;e
+plans, you bounded your views to the
+gaining of a thou&#383;and pounds. It was
+&#383;ufficient to have procured a farm in
+America, which would have been an
+independence. You find now that you
+did not know your&#383;elf, and that a certain
+&#383;ituation in life is more nece&#383;&#383;ary
+to you than you imagined&mdash;more nece&#383;&#383;ary
+than an uncorrupted heart&mdash;For
+a year or two, you may procure your&#383;elf
+what you call plea&#383;ure; eating,
+drinking, and women; but, in the &#383;olitude
+of declining life, I &#383;hall be remembered
+with regret&mdash;I was going to
+&#383;ay with remor&#383;e, but checked my
+pen.</p>
+
+<p>As I have never concealed the nature of
+my connection with you, your repu<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-109_S" id="CPg_3-109_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-109.png">109</a>]</span>tation
+will not &#383;uffer. I &#383;hall never have
+a confident: I am content with the approbation
+of my own mind; and, if there
+be a &#383;earcher of hearts, mine will not
+be de&#383;pi&#383;ed. Reading what you have
+written relative to the de&#383;ertion of women,
+I have often wondered how theory
+and practice could be &#383;o different, till
+I recollected, that the &#383;entiments of
+pa&#383;&#383;ion, and the re&#383;olves of rea&#383;on, are
+very di&#383;tinct. As to my &#383;i&#383;ters, as you
+are &#383;o continually hurried with bu&#383;ine&#383;s,
+you need not write to them&mdash;I
+&#383;hall, when my mind is calmer. God
+ble&#383;s you! Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>This has been &#383;uch a period of barbarity
+and mi&#383;ery, I ought not to complain
+of having my &#383;hare. I wi&#383;h one
+moment that I had never heard of the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-110_S" id="CPg_3-110_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-110.png">110</a>]</span>
+cruelties that have been practi&#383;ed here,
+and the next envy the mothers who
+have been killed with their children.
+Surely I had &#383;uffered enough in life,
+not to be cur&#383;ed with a fondne&#383;s, that
+burns up the vital &#383;tream I am imparting.
+You will think me mad: I
+would I were &#383;o, that I could forget
+my mi&#383;ery&mdash;&#383;o that my head or heart
+would be &#383;till.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Feb. 19.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> I fir&#383;t received your letter,
+putting off your return to an indefinite
+time, I felt &#383;o hurt, that I know not
+what I wrote. I am now calmer,
+though it was not the kind of wound<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-111_S" id="CPg_3-111_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-111.png">111</a>]</span>
+over which time has the quicke&#383;t effect;
+on the contrary, the more I think, the
+&#383;adder I grow. Society fatigues me inexpre&#383;&#383;ibly&mdash;So
+much &#383;o, that finding
+fault with every one, I have only rea&#383;on
+enough, to di&#383;cover that the fault is
+in my&#383;elf. My child alone intere&#383;ts
+me, and, but for her, I &#383;hould not take
+any pains to recover my health.</p>
+
+<p>As it is, I &#383;hall wean her, and try if
+by that &#383;tep (to which I feel a repugnance,
+for it is my only &#383;olace) I can
+get rid of my cough. Phy&#383;icians talk
+much of the danger attending any complaint
+on the lungs, after a woman has
+&#383;uckled for &#383;ome months. They lay a
+&#383;tre&#383;s al&#383;o on the nece&#383;&#383;ity of keeping
+the mind tranquil&mdash;and, my God! how
+has mine been harra&#383;&#383;ed! But whil&#383;t
+the caprices of other women are gratified,
+"the wind of heaven not &#383;uffered<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-112_S" id="CPg_3-112_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-112.png">112</a>]</span>
+to vi&#383;it them too rudely," I have not
+found a guardian angel, in heaven or
+on earth, to ward off &#383;orrow or care
+from my bo&#383;om.</p>
+
+<p>What &#383;acrifices have you not made
+for a woman you did not re&#383;pect!&mdash;But
+I will not go over this ground&mdash;I want
+to tell you that I do not under&#383;tand
+you. You &#383;ay that you have not given
+up all thoughts of returning here&mdash;and
+I know that it will be nece&#383;&#383;ary&mdash;nay,
+is. I cannot explain my&#383;elf; but if you
+have not lo&#383;t your memory, you will
+ea&#383;ily divine my meaning. What! is
+our life then only to be made up of &#383;eparations?
+and am I only to return to
+a country, that has not merely lo&#383;t all
+charms for me, but for which I feel a
+repugnance that almo&#383;t amounts to
+horror, only to be left there a prey to
+it!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-113_S" id="CPg_3-113_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-113.png">113</a>]</span>
+Why is it &#383;o nece&#383;&#383;ary that I &#383;hould
+return?&mdash;brought up here, my girl
+would be freer. Indeed, expecting you
+to join us, I had formed &#383;ome plans
+of u&#383;efulne&#383;s that have now vani&#383;hed
+with my hopes of happine&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>In the bitterne&#383;s of my heart, I could
+complain with rea&#383;on, that I am left
+here dependent on a man, who&#383;e avidity
+to acquire a fortune has rendered
+him callous to every &#383;entiment connected
+with &#383;ocial or affectionate emotions.&mdash;With
+a brutal in&#383;en&#383;ibility, he
+cannot help di&#383;playing the plea&#383;ure
+your determination to &#383;tay gives him,
+in &#383;pite of the effect it is vi&#383;ible it has
+had on me.</p>
+
+<p>Till I can earn money, I &#383;hall endeavour
+to borrow &#383;ome, for I want to
+avoid a&#383;king him continually for the
+&#383;um nece&#383;&#383;ary to maintain me.&mdash;Do not<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-114_S" id="CPg_3-114_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+mi&#383;take me, I have never been refu&#383;ed.&mdash;Yet
+I have gone half a dozen times
+to the hou&#383;e to a&#383;k for it, and come
+away without &#383;peaking&mdash;&mdash;you mu&#383;t
+gue&#383;s why&mdash;Be&#383;ides, I wi&#383;h to avoid
+hearing of the eternal projects to which
+you have &#383;acrificed my peace&mdash;not remembering&mdash;but
+I will be &#383;ilent for
+ever.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">April 7.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Here</span> I am at H&mdash;&mdash;, on the wing
+towards you, and I write now, only to
+tell you, that you may expect me in
+the cour&#383;e of three or four days; for<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-115_S" id="CPg_3-115_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+I &#383;hall not attempt to give vent to the
+different emotions which agitate my
+heart&mdash;You may term a feeling, which
+appears to me to be a degree of delicacy
+that naturally ari&#383;es from &#383;en&#383;ibility,
+pride&mdash;Still I cannot indulge the
+very affectionate tenderne&#383;s which
+glows in my bo&#383;om, without trembling,
+till I &#383;ee, by your eyes, that it is mutual.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;it, lo&#383;t in thought, looking at the
+&#383;ea&mdash;and tears ru&#383;h into my eyes, when
+I find that I am cheri&#383;hing any fond
+expectations.&mdash;I have indeed been &#383;o
+unhappy this winter, I find it as difficult
+to acquire fre&#383;h hopes, as to regain
+tranquillity.&mdash;Enough of this&mdash;lie
+&#383;till, fooli&#383;h heart!&mdash;But for the little
+girl, I could almo&#383;t wi&#383;h that it
+&#383;hould cea&#383;e to beat, to be no more
+alive to the angui&#383;h of di&#383;appointment.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-116_S" id="CPg_3-116_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-116.png">116</a>]</span>
+Sweet little creature! I deprived my&#383;elf
+of my only plea&#383;ure, when I weaned
+her, about ten days ago.&mdash;I am however
+glad I conquered my repugnance.&mdash;It
+was nece&#383;&#383;ary it &#383;hould be done
+&#383;oon, and I did not wi&#383;h to embitter
+the renewal of your acquaintance with
+her, by putting it off till we met.&mdash;It
+was a painful exertion to me, and I
+thought it be&#383;t to throw this inquietude
+with the re&#383;t, into the &#383;ack that I
+would fain throw over my &#383;houlder.&mdash;I
+wi&#383;hed to endure it alone, in &#383;hort&mdash;Yet,
+after &#383;ending her to &#383;leep in the
+next room for three or four nights, you
+cannot think with what joy I took her
+back again to &#383;leep in my bo&#383;om!</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;uppo&#383;e I &#383;hall find you, when I arrive,
+for I do not &#383;ee any nece&#383;&#383;ity for
+your coming to me.&mdash;Pray inform Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;,
+that I have his little friend<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-117_S" id="CPg_3-117_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+with me.&mdash;My wi&#383;hing to oblige him,
+made me put my&#383;elf to &#383;ome inconvenience&mdash;&mdash;and
+delay my departure;
+which was irk&#383;ome to me, who have
+not quite as much philo&#383;ophy, I would
+not for the world &#383;ay indifference, as
+you. God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XXXIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Brighthelm&#383;tone, Saturday, April 11.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Here</span> we are, my love, and mean to
+&#383;et out early in the morning; and, if I
+can find you, I hope to dine with you
+to-morrow.&mdash;I &#383;hall drive to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+hotel, where &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; tells me you have<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-118_S" id="CPg_3-118_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+been&mdash;and, if you have left it, I hope you
+will take care to be there to receive us.</p>
+
+<p>I have brought with me Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s
+little friend, and a girl whom I like to
+take care of our little darling&mdash;not on the
+way, for that fell to my &#383;hare.&mdash;But why
+do I write about trifles?&mdash;or any thing?&mdash;Are
+we not to meet &#383;oon?&mdash;What
+does your heart &#383;ay!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I have weaned my &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and &#383;he
+is now eating away at the white bread.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-119_S" id="CPg_3-119_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-119.png">119</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XL</h4>
+
+<p class="right">London, Friday, May 22.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t received your affectionate
+letter, and am di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ed to think that I
+have added to your embarra&#383;&#383;ments at
+this trouble&#383;ome juncture, when the
+exertion of all the faculties of your mind
+appears to be nece&#383;&#383;ary, to extricate
+you out of your pecuniary difficulties.
+I &#383;uppo&#383;e it was &#383;omething relative to
+the circum&#383;tance you have mentioned,
+which made &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; reque&#383;t to &#383;ee me
+to-day, to <i>conver&#383;e about a matter of great
+importance</i>. Be that as it may, his letter
+(&#383;uch is the &#383;tate of my &#383;pirits) inconceivably
+alarmed me, and rendered<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-120_S" id="CPg_3-120_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-120.png">120</a>]</span>
+the la&#383;t night as di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ing, as the two
+former had been.</p>
+
+<p>I have laboured to calm my mind &#383;ince
+you left me&mdash;Still I find that tranquillity
+is not to be obtained by exertion; it
+is a feeling &#383;o different from the re&#383;ignation
+of de&#383;pair!&mdash;I am however no
+longer angry with you&mdash;nor will I ever
+utter another complaint&mdash;there are
+arguments which convince the rea&#383;on,
+whil&#383;t they carry death to the heart.&mdash;We
+have had too many cruel <ins class="err" title="Transcriber's Note: original reads 'explananations'">explanations</ins>,
+that not only cloud every future
+pro&#383;pect; but embitter the remembrances
+which alone give life to
+affection.&mdash;Let the &#383;ubject never be
+revived!</p>
+
+<p>It &#383;eems to me that I have not only
+lo&#383;t the hope, but the power of being
+happy.&mdash;Every emotion is now &#383;harp<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-121_S" id="CPg_3-121_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-121.png">121</a>]</span>ened
+by angui&#383;h.&mdash;My &#383;oul has been
+&#383;hook, and my tone of feelings de&#383;troyed.&mdash;I
+have gone out&mdash;and &#383;ought
+for di&#383;&#383;ipation, if not amu&#383;ement, merely
+to fatigue &#383;till more, I find, my irritable
+nerves&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>My friend&mdash;my dear friend&mdash;examine
+your&#383;elf well&mdash;I am out of the
+que&#383;tion; for, alas! I am nothing&mdash;and
+di&#383;cover what you wi&#383;h to do&mdash;what
+will render you mo&#383;t comfortable&mdash;or,
+to be more explicit&mdash;whether
+you de&#383;ire to live with me, or part for
+ever? When you can once a&#383;certain it,
+tell me frankly, I conjure you!&mdash;for, believe
+me, I have very involuntarily interrupted
+your peace.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall expect you to dinner on Monday,
+and will endeavour to a&#383;&#383;ume a
+cheerful face to greet you&mdash;at any<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-122_S" id="CPg_3-122_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-122.png">122</a>]</span>
+rate I will avoid conver&#383;ations, which
+only tend to harra&#383;s your feelings, becau&#383;e
+I am mo&#383;t affectionately yours,</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I inclo&#383;e</span> you the letter, which you
+de&#383;ired me to forward, and I am tempted
+very laconically to wi&#383;h you a good
+morning&mdash;not becau&#383;e I am angry, or
+have nothing to &#383;ay; but to keep down
+a wounded &#383;pirit.&mdash;I &#383;hall make every
+effort to calm my mind&mdash;yet a &#383;trong
+conviction &#383;eems to whirl round in the
+very centre of my brain, which, like<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-123_S" id="CPg_3-123_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-123.png">123</a>]</span>
+the fiat of fate, emphatically a&#383;&#383;ures
+me, that grief has a firm hold of my
+heart.</p>
+
+<p>God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">&mdash;, Wedne&#383;day, Two o'Clock.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">We</span> arrived here about an hour ago.
+I am extremely fatigued with the child,
+who would not re&#383;t quiet with any
+body but me, during the night&mdash;and
+now we are here in a comfortle&#383;s,
+damp room, in a &#383;ort of a tomb-like
+hou&#383;e. This however I &#383;hall quickly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-124_S" id="CPg_3-124_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-124.png">124</a>]</span>
+remedy, for, when I have fini&#383;hed this
+letter, (which I mu&#383;t do immediately,
+becau&#383;e the po&#383;t goes out early), I
+&#383;hall &#383;ally forth, and enquire about a
+ve&#383;&#383;el and an inn.</p>
+
+<p>I will not di&#383;tre&#383;s you by talking of
+the depre&#383;&#383;ion of my &#383;pirits, or the
+&#383;truggle I had to keep alive my dying
+heart.&mdash;It is even now too full to allow
+me to write with compo&#383;ure.&mdash;*****,&mdash;dear
+*****, &mdash;am I always to be
+to&#383;&#383;ed about thus?&mdash;&#383;hall I never find
+an a&#383;ylum to re&#383;t <i>contented</i> in? How
+can you love to fly about continually&mdash;dropping
+down, as it were, in a new
+world&mdash;cold and &#383;trange!&mdash;every other
+day? Why do you not attach tho&#383;e
+tender emotions round the idea of home,
+which even now dim my eyes?&mdash;This
+alone is affection&mdash;every thing el&#383;e is
+only humanity, electrified by &#383;ympathy.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-125_S" id="CPg_3-125_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+I will write to you again to-morrow,
+when I know how long I am to be detained&mdash;and
+hope to get a letter quickly
+from you, to cheer yours &#383;incerely
+and affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; is playing near me in high
+&#383;pirits. She was &#383;o plea&#383;ed with the
+noi&#383;e of the mail-horn, &#383;he has been
+continually imitating it.&mdash;&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thur&#383;day.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">A lady</span> has ju&#383;t &#383;ent to offer to
+take me to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. I have then only
+a moment to exclaim again&#383;t the vague<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-126_S" id="CPg_3-126_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-126.png">126</a>]</span>
+manner in which people give information</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+
+<p>But why talk of inconveniences, which
+are in fact trifling, when compared
+with the &#383;inking of the heart I have
+felt! I did not intend to touch this
+painful &#383;tring&mdash;God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly, &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-127_S" id="CPg_3-127_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-127.png">127</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday, June 12.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t received yours dated the
+9th, which I &#383;uppo&#383;e was a mi&#383;take, for
+it could &#383;carcely have loitered &#383;o long
+on the road. The general ob&#383;ervations
+which apply to the &#383;tate of your own
+mind, appear to me ju&#383;t, as far as they
+go; and I &#383;hall always con&#383;ider it as
+one of the mo&#383;t &#383;erious mi&#383;fortunes of
+my life, that I did not meet you, before
+&#383;atiety had rendered your &#383;en&#383;es &#383;o fa&#383;tidious,
+as almo&#383;t to clo&#383;e up every tender
+avenue of &#383;entiment and affection
+that leads to your &#383;ympathetic heart.
+You have a heart, my friend, yet, hurried
+away by the impetuo&#383;ity of inferior
+feelings, you have &#383;ought in vulgar<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-128_S" id="CPg_3-128_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-128.png">128</a>]</span>
+exce&#383;&#383;es, for that gratification which
+only the heart can be&#383;tow.</p>
+
+<p>The common run of men, I know,
+with &#383;trong health and gro&#383;s appetites,
+mu&#383;t have variety to bani&#383;h <i>ennui</i>, becau&#383;e
+the imagination never lends its
+magic wand, to convert appetite into
+love, cemented by according rea&#383;on.&mdash;Ah!
+my friend, you know not the ineffable
+delight, the exqui&#383;ite plea&#383;ure,
+which ari&#383;es from a uni&#383;on of affection
+and de&#383;ire, when the whole &#383;oul and
+&#383;en&#383;es are abandoned to a lively imagination,
+that renders every emotion delicate
+and rapturous. Yes; the&#383;e are
+emotions, over which &#383;atiety has no
+power, and the recollection of which,
+even di&#383;appointment cannot di&#383;enchant;
+but they do not exi&#383;t without &#383;elf-denial.
+The&#383;e emotions, more or le&#383;s
+&#383;trong, appear to me to be the di&#383;tinc<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-129_S" id="CPg_3-129_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-129.png">129</a>]</span>tive
+characteri&#383;tic of genius, the foundation
+of ta&#383;te, and of that exqui&#383;ite
+reli&#383;h for the beauties of nature, of
+which the common herd of eaters and
+drinkers and <i>child-begeters</i>, certainly
+have no idea. You will &#383;mile at an
+ob&#383;ervation that has ju&#383;t occurred to me:&mdash;I
+con&#383;ider tho&#383;e minds as the mo&#383;t
+&#383;trong and original, who&#383;e imagination
+acts as the &#383;timulus to their &#383;en&#383;es.</p>
+
+<p>Well! you will a&#383;k, what is the re&#383;ult
+of all this rea&#383;oning? Why I cannot
+help thinking that it is po&#383;&#383;ible for
+you, having great &#383;trength of mind,
+to return to nature, and regain a &#383;anity
+of con&#383;titution, and purity of feeling&mdash;which
+would open your heart to me.&mdash;I
+would fain re&#383;t there!</p>
+
+<p>Yet, convinced more than ever of
+the &#383;incerity and tenderne&#383;s of my attachment
+to you, the involuntary hopes,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-130_S" id="CPg_3-130_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-130.png">130</a>]</span>
+which a determination to live has revived,
+are not &#383;ufficiently &#383;trong to di&#383;&#383;ipate
+the cloud, that de&#383;pair has &#383;pread
+over futurity. I have looked at the
+&#383;ea, and at my child, hardly daring to
+own to my&#383;elf the &#383;ecret wi&#383;h, that it
+might become our tomb; and that the
+heart, &#383;till &#383;o alive to angui&#383;h, might
+there be quieted by death. At this
+moment ten thou&#383;and complicated &#383;entiments
+pre&#383;s for utterance, weigh on
+my heart, and ob&#383;cure my &#383;ight.</p>
+
+<p>Are we ever to meet again? and will
+you endeavour to render that meeting
+happier than the la&#383;t? Will you endeavour
+to re&#383;train your caprices, in order
+to give vigour to affection, and to give
+play to the checked &#383;entiments that
+nature intended &#383;hould expand your
+heart? I cannot indeed, without agony,
+think of your bo&#383;om's being conti<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-131_S" id="CPg_3-131_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-131.png">131</a>]</span>nually
+contaminated; and bitter are
+the tears which exhau&#383;t my eyes, when
+I recollect why my child and I are
+forced to &#383;tray from the a&#383;ylum, in
+which, after &#383;o many &#383;torms, I had
+hoped to re&#383;t, &#383;miling at angry fate.&mdash;The&#383;e
+are not common &#383;orrows; nor
+can you perhaps conceive, how much
+active fortitude it requires to labour
+perpetually to blunt the &#383;hafts of di&#383;appointment.</p>
+
+<p>Examine now your&#383;elf, and a&#383;certain
+whether you can live in &#383;omething-like
+a &#383;ettled &#383;tile. Let our confidence
+in future be unbounded; con&#383;ider whether
+you find it nece&#383;&#383;ary to &#383;acrifice
+me to what you term "the ze&#383;t of life;"
+and, when you have once a clear view
+of your own motives, of your own incentive
+to action, do not deceive me!</p>
+
+<p>The train of thoughts which the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-132_S" id="CPg_3-132_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-132.png">132</a>]</span>
+writing of this epi&#383;tle awoke, makes
+me &#383;o wretched, that I mu&#383;t take a
+walk, to rou&#383;e and calm my mind.
+But fir&#383;t, let me tell you, that, if you
+really wi&#383;h to promote my happine&#383;s,
+you will endeavour to give me as much
+as you can of your&#383;elf. You have great
+mental energy; and your judgment
+&#383;eems to me &#383;o ju&#383;t, that it is only the
+dupe of your inclination in di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ing
+one &#383;ubject.</p>
+
+<p>The po&#383;t does not go out to-day.
+To-morrow I may write more tranquilly.
+I cannot yet &#383;ay when the ve&#383;&#383;el
+will &#383;ail in which I have determined
+to depart.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Morning.</p>
+
+<p>Your &#383;econd letter reached me about
+an hour ago. You were certainly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-133_S" id="CPg_3-133_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-133.png">133</a>]</span>
+wrong, in &#383;uppo&#383;ing that I did not mention
+you with re&#383;pect; though, without
+my being con&#383;cious of it, &#383;ome &#383;parks
+of re&#383;entment may have animated the
+gloom of de&#383;pair&mdash;Yes; with le&#383;s affection,
+I &#383;hould have been more re&#383;pectful.
+However the regard which I
+have for you, is &#383;o unequivocal to my&#383;elf,
+I imagine that it mu&#383;t be &#383;ufficiently
+obvious to every body el&#383;e. Be&#383;ides,
+the only letter I intended for the
+public eye was to &mdash;&mdash;, and that I de&#383;troyed
+from delicacy before you &#383;aw
+them, becau&#383;e it was only written (of
+cour&#383;e warmly in your prai&#383;e) to prevent
+any odium being thrown on you<a name="FNanchor_133-A_20_S" id="CFNanchor_133-A_20_S"></a><a href="#CFootnote_133-A_20_S" class="fnanchor">[133-A]</a>.</p>
+
+<p>I am harra&#383;&#383;ed by your embarra&#383;&#383;ments,
+and &#383;hall certainly u&#383;e all my<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-134_S" id="CPg_3-134_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-134.png">134</a>]</span>
+efforts, to make the bu&#383;ine&#383;s terminate
+to your &#383;ati&#383;faction in which I am engaged.</p>
+
+<p>My friend&mdash;my deare&#383;t friend&mdash;I feel
+my fate united to yours by the mo&#383;t &#383;acred
+principles of my &#383;oul, and the
+yearns of&mdash;yes, I will &#383;ay it&mdash;a true,
+un&#383;ophi&#383;ticated heart.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours mo&#383;t truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>If the wind be fair, the captain
+talks of &#383;ailing on Monday; but I am
+afraid I &#383;hall be detained &#383;ome days
+longer. At any rate, continue to write,
+(I want this &#383;upport) till you are &#383;ure
+I am where I cannot expect a letter;
+and, if any &#383;hould arrive after my departure,
+a gentleman (not Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s
+friend, I promi&#383;e you) from whom I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-135_S" id="CPg_3-135_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-135.png">135</a>]</span>
+have received great civilities, will &#383;end
+them after me.</p>
+
+<p>Do write by every occa&#383;ion! I am
+anxious to hear how your affairs go on;
+and, &#383;till more, to be convinced that you
+are not &#383;eparating your&#383;elf from us.
+For my little darling is calling papa,
+and adding her parrot word&mdash;Come,
+Come! And will you not come, and
+let us exert our&#383;elves?&mdash;I &#383;hall recover
+all my energy, when I am convinced
+that my exertions will draw us more
+clo&#383;ely together. One more adieu!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-136_S" id="CPg_3-136_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-136.png">136</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday, June 14.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I rather</span> expected to hear from you
+to-day&mdash;I wi&#383;h you would not fail to
+write to me for a little time, becau&#383;e I
+am not quite well&mdash;Whether I have any
+good &#383;leep or not, I wake in the morning
+in violent fits of trembling&mdash;and,
+in &#383;pite of all my efforts, the child&mdash;every
+thing&mdash;fatigues me, in which I
+&#383;eek for &#383;olace or amu&#383;ement.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. &mdash;&mdash; forced on me a letter to a
+phy&#383;ician of this place; it was fortunate,
+for I &#383;hould otherwi&#383;e have had &#383;ome
+difficulty to obtain the nece&#383;&#383;ary information.
+His wife is a pretty woman
+(I can admire, you know, a pretty wo<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-137_S" id="CPg_3-137_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-137.png">137</a>]</span>man,
+when I am alone) and he an intelligent
+and rather intere&#383;ting man.&mdash;They
+have behaved to me with great
+ho&#383;pitality; and poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; was never
+&#383;o happy in her life, as among&#383;t their
+young brood.</p>
+
+<p>They took me in their carriage to
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, and I ran over my favourite
+walks, with a vivacity that would have
+a&#383;toni&#383;hed you.&mdash;The town did not
+plea&#383;e me quite &#383;o well as formerly&mdash;It
+appeared &#383;o diminutive; and, when
+I found that many of the inhabitants
+had lived in the &#383;ame hou&#383;es ever &#383;ince
+I left it, I could not help wondering
+how they could thus have vegetated,
+whil&#383;t I was running over a world of
+&#383;orrow, &#383;natching at plea&#383;ure, and
+throwing off prejudices. The place
+where I at pre&#383;ent am, is much improved;
+but it is a&#383;toni&#383;hing what<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-138_S" id="CPg_3-138_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-138.png">138</a>]</span>
+&#383;trides ari&#383;tocracy and fanatici&#383;m have
+made, &#383;ince I re&#383;ided in this country.</p>
+
+<p>The wind does not appear inclined
+to change, &#383;o I am &#383;till forced to linger&mdash;When
+do you think that you &#383;hall
+be able to &#383;et out for France? I do
+not entirely like the a&#383;pect of your affairs,
+and &#383;till le&#383;s your connections on
+either &#383;ide of the water. Often do I
+&#383;igh, when I think of your entanglements
+in bu&#383;ine&#383;s, and your extreme
+re&#383;tle&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s of mind.&mdash;Even now I am
+almo&#383;t afraid to a&#383;k you, whether the
+plea&#383;ure of being free, does not over-balance
+the pain you felt at parting
+with me? Sometimes I indulge the
+hope that you will feel me nece&#383;&#383;ary to
+you&mdash;or why &#383;hould we meet again?&mdash;but,
+the moment after, de&#383;pair damps
+my ri&#383;ing &#383;pirits, aggravated by the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-139_S" id="CPg_3-139_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-139.png">139</a>]</span>
+emotions of tenderne&#383;s, which ought
+to &#383;often the cares of life.&mdash;&mdash;God
+ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p>Yours &#383;incerely and affectionately</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XLVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">June 15.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I want</span> to know how you have
+&#383;ettled with re&#383;pect to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. In
+&#383;hort, be very particular in your account
+of all your affairs&mdash;let our confidence,
+my dear, be unbounded.&mdash;The
+la&#383;t time we were &#383;eparated, was
+a &#383;eparation indeed on your part&mdash;Now
+you have acted more ingenuou&#383;ly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-140_S" id="CPg_3-140_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-140.png">140</a>]</span>,
+let the mo&#383;t affectionate interchange of
+&#383;entiments fill up the aching void of
+di&#383;appointment. I almo&#383;t dread that
+your plans will prove abortive&mdash;yet
+&#383;hould the mo&#383;t unlucky turn &#383;end
+you home to us, convinced that a true
+friend is a trea&#383;ure, I &#383;hould not much
+mind having to &#383;truggle with the world
+again. Accu&#383;e me not of pride&mdash;yet
+&#383;ometimes, when nature has opened
+my heart to its author, I have wondered
+that you did not &#383;et a higher value on
+my heart.</p>
+
+<p>Receive a ki&#383;s from &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, I was
+going to add, if you will not take one
+from me, and believe me yours</p>
+
+<p class="right">Sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>The wind &#383;till continues in the &#383;ame
+quarter.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-141_S" id="CPg_3-141_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-141.png">141</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tue&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> captain has ju&#383;t &#383;ent to inform
+me, that I mu&#383;t be on board in the cour&#383;e
+of a few hours.&mdash;I wi&#383;hed to have
+&#383;tayed till to-morrow. It would have
+been a comfort to me to have received
+another letter from you&mdash;Should one
+arrive, it will be &#383;ent after me.</p>
+
+<p>My &#383;pirits are agitated, I &#383;carcely
+know why&mdash;&mdash;The quitting England
+&#383;eems to be a fre&#383;h parting.&mdash;Surely
+you will not forget me.&mdash;A thou&#383;and
+weak forebodings a&#383;&#383;ault my &#383;oul, and
+the &#383;tate of my health renders me &#383;en&#383;ible
+to every thing. It is &#383;urpri&#383;ing
+that in London, in a continual con<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-142_S" id="CPg_3-142_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-142.png">142</a>]</span>flict
+of mind, I was &#383;till growing better&mdash;whil&#383;t
+here, bowed down by the
+de&#383;potic hand of fate, forced into re&#383;ignation
+by de&#383;pair, I &#383;eem to be fading
+away&mdash;peri&#383;hing beneath a cruel
+blight, that withers up all my faculties.</p>
+
+<p>The child is perfectly well. My
+hand &#383;eems unwilling to add adieu! I
+know not why this inexpre&#383;&#383;ible &#383;adne&#383;s
+has taken po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ion of me.&mdash;It is
+not a pre&#383;entiment of ill. Yet, having
+been &#383;o perpetually the &#383;port of di&#383;appointment,&mdash;having
+a heart that has
+been as it were a mark for mi&#383;ery, I
+dread to meet wretchedne&#383;s in &#383;ome
+new &#383;hape.&mdash;Well, let it come&mdash;I care
+not!&mdash;what have I to dread, who have
+&#383;o little to hope for! God ble&#383;s you&mdash;I
+am mo&#383;t affectionately and &#383;incerely
+yours</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-143_S" id="CPg_3-143_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-143.png">143</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I was</span> hurried on board ye&#383;terday
+about three o'clock, the wind having
+changed. But before evening it veered
+round to the old point; and here we
+are, in the mid&#383;t of mi&#383;ts and water,
+only taking advantage of the tide to advance
+a few miles.</p>
+
+<p>You will &#383;carcely &#383;uppo&#383;e that I left
+the town with reluctance&mdash;yet it was
+even &#383;o&mdash;for I wi&#383;hed to receive another
+letter from you, and I felt pain
+at parting, for ever perhaps, from the
+amiable family, who had treated me with
+&#383;o much ho&#383;pitality and kindne&#383;s. They
+will probably &#383;end me your letter, if it<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-144_S" id="CPg_3-144_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-144.png">144</a>]</span>
+arrives this morning; for here we are
+likely to remain, I am afraid to think
+how long.</p>
+
+<p>The ve&#383;&#383;el is very commodious, and
+the captain a civil, open-hearted kind
+of man. There being no other pa&#383;&#383;engers,
+I have the cabin to my&#383;elf,
+which is plea&#383;ant; and I have brought
+a few books with me to beguile wearine&#383;s;
+but I &#383;eem inclined, rather to
+employ the dead moments of &#383;u&#383;pence
+in writing &#383;ome effu&#383;ions, than in reading.</p>
+
+<p>What are you about? How are
+your affairs going on? It may be a
+long time before you an&#383;wer the&#383;e
+que&#383;tions. My dear friend, my heart
+&#383;inks within me!&mdash;Why am I forced
+thus to &#383;truggle continually with my
+affections and feelings?&mdash;Ah! why are
+tho&#383;e affections and feelings the &#383;ource<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-145_S" id="CPg_3-145_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-145.png">145</a>]</span>
+of &#383;o much mi&#383;ery, when they &#383;eem to
+have been given to vivify my heart, and
+extend my u&#383;efulne&#383;s! But I mu&#383;t not
+dwell on this &#383;ubject.&mdash;Will you not
+endeavour to cheri&#383;h all the affection
+you can for me? What am I &#383;aying?&mdash;Rather
+forget me, if you can&mdash;if
+other gratifications are dearer to you.&mdash;How
+is every remembrance of mine
+embittered by di&#383;appointment? What a
+world is this!&mdash;They only &#383;eem happy,
+who never look beyond &#383;en&#383;ual or artificial
+enjoyments.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; begins to play with the
+cabin-boy, and is as gay as a lark.&mdash;I
+will labour to be tranquil; and am in
+every mood,</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-146_S" id="CPg_3-146_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-146.png">146</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XLIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thur&#383;day.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Here</span> I am &#383;till&mdash;and I have ju&#383;t received
+your letter of Monday by the
+pilot, who promi&#383;ed to bring it to me,
+if we were detained, as he expected,
+by the wind.&mdash;It is indeed weari&#383;ome
+to be thus to&#383;&#383;ed about without going
+forward.&mdash;I have a violent head-ache&mdash;yet
+I am obliged to take care of
+the child, who is a little tormented
+by her teeth, becau&#383;e &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; is unable
+to do any thing, &#383;he is rendered
+&#383;o &#383;ick by the motion of the &#383;hip, as
+we ride at anchor.</p>
+
+<p>The&#383;e are however trifling inconveniences,
+compared with angui&#383;h of
+mind&mdash;compared with the &#383;inking of a<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-147_S" id="CPg_3-147_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-147.png">147</a>]</span>
+broken heart.&mdash;To tell you the truth, I
+never &#383;uffered in my life &#383;o much from
+depre&#383;&#383;ion of &#383;pirits&mdash;from de&#383;pair.&mdash;I
+do not &#383;leep&mdash;or, if I clo&#383;e my eyes, it
+is to have the mo&#383;t terrifying dreams, in
+which I often meet you with different
+ca&#383;ts of countenance.</p>
+
+<p>I will not, my dear &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, torment
+you by dwelling on my &#383;ufferings&mdash;and
+will u&#383;e all my efforts to calm my mind,
+in&#383;tead of deadening it&mdash;at pre&#383;ent it is
+mo&#383;t painfully active. I find I am not
+equal to the&#383;e continual &#383;truggles&mdash;yet
+your letter this morning has afforded
+me &#383;ome comfort&mdash;and I will try to revive
+hope. One thing let me tell you&mdash;when
+we meet again&mdash;&#383;urely we are to
+meet!&mdash;it mu&#383;t be to part no more. I
+mean not to have &#383;eas between us&mdash;it
+is more than I can &#383;upport.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-148_S" id="CPg_3-148_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+The pilot is hurrying me&mdash;God ble&#383;s
+you.</p>
+
+<p>In &#383;pite of the commodiou&#383;ne&#383;s of
+the ve&#383;&#383;el, every thing here would di&#383;gu&#383;t
+my &#383;en&#383;es, had I nothing el&#383;e to
+think of&mdash;"When the mind's free, the
+body's delicate;"&mdash;mine has been too
+much hurt to regard trifles.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours mo&#383;t truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER L</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">This</span> is the fifth dreary day I have
+been impri&#383;oned by the wind, with
+every outward object to di&#383;gu&#383;t the
+&#383;en&#383;es, and unable to bani&#383;h the remembrances
+that &#383;adden my heart.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-149_S" id="CPg_3-149_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+How am I altered by di&#383;appointment!&mdash;When
+going to &mdash;&mdash;, ten years
+ago, the ela&#383;ticity of my mind was
+&#383;ufficient to ward off wearine&#383;s&mdash;and
+the imagination &#383;till could dip her
+bru&#383;h in the rainbow of fancy, and
+&#383;ketch futurity in &#383;miling colours. Now
+I am going towards the North in
+&#383;earch of &#383;unbeams!&mdash;Will any ever
+warm this de&#383;olated heart? All nature
+&#383;eems to frown&mdash;or rather mourn with
+me.&mdash;Every thing is cold&mdash;cold as my
+expectations! Before I left the &#383;hore,
+tormented, as I now am, by the&#383;e
+North ea&#383;t <i>chillers</i>, I could not help
+exclaiming&mdash;Give me, gracious Heaven!
+at lea&#383;t, genial weather, if I am
+never to meet the genial affection that
+&#383;till warms this agitated bo&#383;om&mdash;compelling
+life to linger there.</p>
+
+<p>I am now going on &#383;hore with the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-150_S" id="CPg_3-150_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+captain, though the weather be rough,
+to &#383;eek for milk, &amp;c. at a little village,
+and to take a walk&mdash;after which I hope
+to &#383;leep&mdash;for, confined here, &#383;urrounded
+by di&#383;agreeable &#383;mells, I have lo&#383;t
+the little appetite I had; and I lie
+awake, till thinking almo&#383;t drives me
+to the brink of madne&#383;s&mdash;only to the
+brink, for I never forget, even in the
+feveri&#383;h &#383;lumbers I &#383;ometimes fall into,
+the mi&#383;ery I am labouring to blunt the
+the &#383;en&#383;e of, by every exertion in my
+power.</p>
+
+<p>Poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; &#383;till continues &#383;ick,
+and &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; grows weary when the
+weather will not allow her to remain
+on deck.</p>
+
+<p>I hope this will be the la&#383;t letter I &#383;hall
+write from England to you&mdash;are you
+not tired of this lingering adieu?</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-151_S" id="CPg_3-151_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-151.png">151</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> captain la&#383;t night, after I had
+written my letter to you intended to
+be left at a little village, offered to go
+to &mdash;&mdash; to pa&#383;s to-day. We had a
+trouble&#383;ome &#383;ail&mdash;and now I mu&#383;t hurry
+on board again, for the wind has
+changed.</p>
+
+<p>I half expected to find a letter from
+you here. Had you written one haphazard,
+it would have been kind and
+con&#383;iderate&mdash;you might have known,
+had you thought, that the wind would
+not permit me to depart. The&#383;e are
+attentions, more grateful to the heart<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-152_S" id="CPg_3-152_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-152.png">152</a>]</span>
+than offers of &#383;ervice&mdash;But why do I
+fooli&#383;hly continue to look for them?</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! adieu! My friend&mdash;your
+friend&#383;hip is very cold&mdash;you &#383;ee I am
+hurt.&mdash;God ble&#383;s you! I may perhaps
+be, &#383;ome time or other, independent in
+every &#383;en&#383;e of the word&mdash;Ah! there
+is but one &#383;en&#383;e of it of con&#383;equence.
+I will break or bend this weak heart&mdash;yet
+even now it is full.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>The child is well; I did not leave
+her on board.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-153_S" id="CPg_3-153_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-153.png">153</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">June 27, Saturday.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I arrived</span> in &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; this afternoon,
+after vainly attempting to land
+at &mdash;&mdash;. I have now but a moment,
+before the po&#383;t goes out, to inform you
+we have got here; though not without
+con&#383;iderable difficulty, for we were &#383;et
+a&#383;hore in a boat above twenty miles
+below.</p>
+
+<p>What I &#383;uffered in the ve&#383;&#383;el I will
+not now de&#383;cant upon&mdash;nor mention
+the plea&#383;ure I received from the &#383;ight
+of the rocky coa&#383;t.&mdash;This morning
+however, walking to join the carriage
+that was to tran&#383;port us to this place,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-154_S" id="CPg_3-154_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+I fell, without any previous warning,
+&#383;en&#383;ele&#383;s on the rocks&mdash;and how I
+e&#383;caped with life I can &#383;carcely gue&#383;s.
+I was in a &#383;tupour for a quarter of an
+hour; the &#383;uffu&#383;ion of blood at la&#383;t re&#383;tored
+me to my &#383;en&#383;es&mdash;the contu&#383;ion
+is great, and my brain confu&#383;ed. The
+child is well.</p>
+
+<p>Twenty miles ride in the rain, after
+my accident, has &#383;ufficiently deranged
+me&mdash;and here I could not get a fire to
+warm me, or any thing warm to eat;
+the inns are mere &#383;tables&mdash;I mu&#383;t neverthele&#383;s
+go to bed. For God's &#383;ake, let
+me hear from you immediately, my
+friend! I am not well and yet you
+&#383;ee I cannot die.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-155_S" id="CPg_3-155_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-155.png">155</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">June 29.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wrote</span> to you by the la&#383;t po&#383;t, to
+inform you of my arrival; and I believe
+I alluded to the extreme fatigue I endured
+on &#383;hip-board, owing to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s
+illne&#383;s, and the roughne&#383;s of the weather&mdash;I
+likewi&#383;e mentioned to you my
+fall, the effects of which I &#383;till feel,
+though I do not think it will have any
+&#383;erious con&#383;equences.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; will go with me, if I find it
+nece&#383;&#383;ary to go to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. The inns
+here are &#383;o bad, I was forced to accept
+of an apartment in his hou&#383;e. I am
+overwhelmed with civilities on all &#383;ides,<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-156_S" id="CPg_3-156_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-156.png">156</a>]</span>
+and fatigued with the endeavours to
+amu&#383;e me, from which I cannot e&#383;cape.</p>
+
+<p>My friend&mdash;my friend, I am not
+well&mdash;a deadly weight of &#383;orrow lies
+heavily on my heart. I am again to&#383;&#383;ed
+on the troubled billows of life; and
+obliged to cope with difficulties, without
+being buoyed up by the hopes that
+alone render them bearable. "How flat,
+dull, and unprofitable," appears to me
+all the bu&#383;tle into which I &#383;ee people
+here &#383;o eagerly enter! I long every
+night to go to bed, to hide my melancholy
+face in my pillow; but there is
+a canker-worm in my bo&#383;om that never
+&#383;leeps.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-157_S" id="CPg_3-157_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-157.png">157</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 1.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I labour</span> in vain to calm my mind&mdash;my
+&#383;oul has been overwhelmed by &#383;orrow
+and di&#383;appointment. Every thing
+fatigues me&mdash;this is a life that cannot
+la&#383;t long. It is you who mu&#383;t determine
+with re&#383;pect to futurity&mdash;and,
+when you have, I will act accordingly&mdash;I
+mean, we mu&#383;t either re&#383;olve to live
+together, or part for ever, I cannot
+bear the&#383;e continual &#383;truggles&mdash;But I
+wi&#383;h you to examine carefully your own
+heart and mind; and, if you perceive
+the lea&#383;t chance of being happier without
+me than with me, or if your incli<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-158_S" id="CPg_3-158_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-158.png">158</a>]</span>nation
+leans capriciou&#383;ly to that &#383;ide,
+do not di&#383;&#383;emble; but tell me frankly
+that you will never &#383;ee me more. I
+will then adopt the plan I mentioned
+to you&mdash;for we mu&#383;t either live together,
+or I will be entirely independent.</p>
+
+<p>My heart is &#383;o oppre&#383;&#383;ed, I cannot
+write with preci&#383;ion&mdash;You know however
+that what I &#383;o imperfectly expre&#383;s,
+are not the crude &#383;entiments of the
+moment&mdash;You can only contribute to
+my comfort (it is the con&#383;olation I am
+in need of) by being with me&mdash;and, if
+the tendere&#383;t friend&#383;hip is of any value,
+why will you not look to me for a degree
+of &#383;ati&#383;faction that heartle&#383;s affections
+cannot be&#383;tow?</p>
+
+<p>Tell me then, will you determine to
+meet me at Ba&#383;le?&mdash;I &#383;hall, I &#383;hould
+imagine, be at &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; before the clo&#383;e
+of Augu&#383;t; and, after you &#383;ettle your<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-159_S" id="CPg_3-159_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-159.png">159</a>]</span>
+affairs at Paris, could we not meet
+there?</p>
+
+<p>God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>Poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; has &#383;uffered during the
+journey with her teeth.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 3.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">There</span> was a gloomine&#383;s diffu&#383;ed
+through your la&#383;t letter, the impre&#383;&#383;ion
+of which &#383;till re&#383;ts on my mind&mdash;though,
+recollecting how quickly you throw off
+the forcible feelings of the moment, I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-160_S" id="CPg_3-160_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-160.png">160</a>]</span>
+flatter my&#383;elf it has long &#383;ince given
+place to your u&#383;ual cheerfulne&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>Believe me (and my eyes fill with
+tears of tenderne&#383;s as I a&#383;&#383;ure you)
+there is nothing I would not endure in
+the way of privation, rather than di&#383;turb
+your tranquillity.&mdash;If I am fated
+to be unhappy, I will labour to hide
+my &#383;orrows in my own bo&#383;om; and you
+&#383;hall always find me a faithful, affectionate
+friend.</p>
+
+<p>I grow more and more attached to
+my little girl&mdash;and I cheri&#383;h this affection
+without fear, becau&#383;e it mu&#383;t be
+a long time before it can become bitterne&#383;s
+of &#383;oul.&mdash;She is an intere&#383;ting
+creature.&mdash;On &#383;hip-board, how often
+as I gazed at the &#383;ea, have I longed to
+bury my troubled bo&#383;om in the le&#383;s
+troubled deep; a&#383;&#383;erting with Brutus,
+"that the virtue I had followed too<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-161_S" id="CPg_3-161_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-161.png">161</a>]</span>
+far, was merely an empty name!" and
+nothing but the &#383;ight of her&mdash;her playful
+&#383;miles, which &#383;eemed to cling and
+twine round my heart&mdash;could have
+&#383;topped me.</p>
+
+<p>What peculiar mi&#383;ery has fallen to
+my &#383;hare! To act up to my principles,
+I have laid the &#383;tricte&#383;t re&#383;traint
+on my very thoughts&mdash;yes; not to
+&#383;ully the delicacy of my feelings, I have
+reined in my imagination; and &#383;tarted
+with affright from every &#383;en&#383;ation,
+(I allude to &mdash;&mdash;) that &#383;tealing with
+balmy &#383;weetne&#383;s into my &#383;oul, led me
+to &#383;cent from afar the fragrance of reviving
+nature.</p>
+
+<p>My friend, I have dearly paid for
+one conviction.&mdash;Love, in &#383;ome minds,
+is an affair of &#383;entiment, ari&#383;ing from
+the &#383;ame delicacy of perception (or
+ta&#383;te) as renders them alive to the<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-162_S" id="CPg_3-162_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-162.png">162</a>]</span>
+beauties of nature, poetry, &amp;c., alive
+to the charms of tho&#383;e evane&#383;cent graces
+that are, as it were, impalpable&mdash;they
+mu&#383;t be felt, they cannot be de&#383;cribed.</p>
+
+<p>Love is a want of my heart. I have
+examined my&#383;elf lately with more care
+than formerly, and find, that to deaden
+is not to calm the mind&mdash;Aiming at
+tranquillity, I have almo&#383;t de&#383;troyed all
+the energy of my &#383;oul&mdash;almo&#383;t rooted
+out what renders it e&#383;timable&mdash;Yes, I
+have damped that enthu&#383;ia&#383;m of character,
+which converts the gro&#383;&#383;e&#383;t
+materials into a fuel, that imperceptibly
+feeds hopes, which a&#383;pire above
+common enjoyment. De&#383;pair, &#383;ince
+the birth of my child, has rendered me
+&#383;tupid&mdash;&#383;oul and body &#383;eemed to be
+fading away before the withering touch
+of di&#383;appointment.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-163_S" id="CPg_3-163_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+I am now endeavouring to recover
+my&#383;elf&mdash;and &#383;uch is the ela&#383;ticity of my
+con&#383;titution, and the purity of the atmo&#383;phere
+here, that health un&#383;ought
+for, begins to reanimate my countenance.</p>
+
+<p>I have the &#383;incere&#383;t e&#383;teem and affection
+for you&mdash;but the de&#383;ire of regaining
+peace, (do you under&#383;tand me?)
+has made me forget the re&#383;pect due to
+my own emotions&mdash;&#383;acred emotions,
+that are the &#383;ure harbingers of the delights
+I was formed to enjoy&mdash;and
+&#383;hall enjoy, for nothing can extingui&#383;h
+the heavenly &#383;park.</p>
+
+<p>Still, when we meet again, I will
+not torment you, I promi&#383;e you. I
+blu&#383;h when I recollect my former conduct&mdash;and
+will not in future confound
+my&#383;elf with the beings whom I feel to<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-164_S" id="CPg_3-164_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-164.png">164</a>]</span>
+be my inferiors.&mdash;I will li&#383;ten to delicacy,
+or pride.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 4.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I hope</span> to hear from you by to-morrow's
+mail. My deare&#383;t friend! I cannot
+tear my affections from you&mdash;and,
+though every remembrance &#383;tings me
+to the &#383;oul, I think of you, till I make
+allowance for the very defects of character,
+that have given &#383;uch a cruel &#383;tab
+to my peace.</p>
+
+<p>Still however I am more alive, than
+you have &#383;een me for a long, long time.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-165_S" id="CPg_3-165_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+I have a degree of vivacity, even in my
+grief, which is preferable to the benumbing
+&#383;tupour that, for the la&#383;t year,
+has frozen up all my faculties.&mdash;Perhaps
+this change is more owing to returning
+health, than to the vigour of
+my rea&#383;on&mdash;for, in &#383;pite of &#383;adne&#383;s (and
+&#383;urely I have had my &#383;hare), the purity
+of this air, and the being continually
+out in it, for I &#383;leep in the country every
+night, has made an alteration in my
+appearance that really &#383;urpri&#383;es me.&mdash;The
+ro&#383;y fingers of health already &#383;treak
+my cheeks&mdash;and I have &#383;een a <i>phy&#383;ical</i>
+life in my eyes, after I have been climbing
+the rocks, that re&#383;embled the fond,
+credulous hopes of youth.</p>
+
+<p>With what a cruel &#383;igh have I recollected
+that I had forgotten to hope!&mdash;Rea&#383;on,
+or rather experience, does not
+thus cruelly damp poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s plea<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-166_S" id="CPg_3-166_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-166.png">166</a>]</span>&#383;ures;
+&#383;he plays all day in the garden
+with &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s children, and makes
+friends for her&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>Do not tell me, that you are happier
+without us&mdash;Will you not come to us in
+Switzerland? Ah, why do not you
+love us with more &#383;entiment?&mdash;why
+are you a creature of &#383;uch &#383;ympathy,
+that the warmth of your feelings, or
+rather quickne&#383;s of your &#383;en&#383;es, hardens
+your heart? It is my mi&#383;fortune,
+that my imagination is perpetually
+&#383;hading your defects, and lending you
+charms, whil&#383;t the gro&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s of your
+&#383;en&#383;es makes you (call me not vain)
+overlook graces in me, that only dignity
+of mind, and the &#383;en&#383;ibility of an
+expanded heart can give.&mdash;God ble&#383;s
+you! Adieu.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-167_S" id="CPg_3-167_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-167.png">167</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 7.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I could</span> not help feeling extremely
+mortified la&#383;t po&#383;t, at not receiving
+a letter from you. My being at &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+was but a chance, and you might have
+hazarded it; and would a year ago.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall not however complain&mdash;There
+are mi&#383;fortunes &#383;o great, as to
+&#383;ilence the u&#383;ual expre&#383;&#383;ions of &#383;orrow&mdash;Believe
+me, there is &#383;uch a thing as a
+broken heart! There are characters
+who&#383;e very energy preys upon them;
+and who, ever inclined to cheri&#383;h by
+reflection &#383;ome pa&#383;&#383;ion, cannot re&#383;t &#383;ati&#383;fied
+with the common comforts of<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-168_S" id="CPg_3-168_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-168.png">168</a>]</span>
+life. I have endeavoured to fly from
+my&#383;elf, and launched into all the di&#383;&#383;ipation
+po&#383;&#383;ible here, only to feel keener
+angui&#383;h, when alone with my child.</p>
+
+<p>Still, could any thing plea&#383;e me&mdash;had
+not di&#383;appointment cut me off
+from life, this romantic country, the&#383;e
+fine evenings, would intere&#383;t me.&mdash;My
+God! can any thing? and am I ever
+to feel alive only to painful &#383;en&#383;ations?&mdash;But
+it cannot&mdash;it &#383;hall not la&#383;t
+long.</p>
+
+<p>The po&#383;t is again arrived; I have
+&#383;ent to &#383;eek for letters, only to be
+wounded to the &#383;oul by a negative.&mdash;My
+brain &#383;eems on fire, I mu&#383;t go into
+the air.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-169_S" id="CPg_3-169_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-169.png">169</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 14.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> now on my journey to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;.
+I felt more at leaving my child, than I
+thought I &#383;hould&mdash;and, whil&#383;t at night
+I imagined every in&#383;tant that I heard
+the half-formed &#383;ounds of her voice,&mdash;I
+a&#383;ked my&#383;elf how I could think of
+parting with her for ever, of leaving
+her thus helple&#383;s?</p>
+
+<p>Poor lamb! It may run very well
+in a tale, that "God will temper the
+winds to the &#383;horn lamb!" but how
+can I expect that &#383;he will be &#383;hielded,
+when my naked bo&#383;om has had to
+brave continually the pitile&#383;s &#383;torm?<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-170_S" id="CPg_3-170_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-170.png">170</a>]</span>
+Yes; I could add, with poor Lear&mdash;What
+is the war of elements to the
+pangs of di&#383;appointed affection, and
+the horror ari&#383;ing from a di&#383;covery of
+a breach of confidence, that &#383;naps every
+&#383;ocial tie!</p>
+
+<p>All is not right &#383;omewhere!&mdash;When
+you fir&#383;t knew me, I was not thus lo&#383;t.
+I could &#383;till confide&mdash;for I opened my
+heart to you&mdash;of this only comfort you
+have deprived me, whil&#383;t my happine&#383;s,
+you tell me, was your fir&#383;t object.
+Strange want of judgment!</p>
+
+<p>I will not complain; but, from the
+&#383;oundne&#383;s of your under&#383;tanding, I am
+convinced, if you give your&#383;elf leave to
+reflect, you will al&#383;o feel, that your
+conduct to me, &#383;o far from being generous,
+has not been ju&#383;t.&mdash;I mean not
+to allude to factitious principles of
+morality; but to the &#383;imple ba&#383;is of all<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-171_S" id="CPg_3-171_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-171.png">171</a>]</span>
+rectitude.&mdash;However I did not intend
+to argue&mdash;Your not writing is cruel&mdash;and
+my rea&#383;on is perhaps di&#383;turbed
+by con&#383;tant wretchedne&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>Poor &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; would fain have accompanied
+me, out of tenderne&#383;s; for
+my fainting, or rather convul&#383;ion,
+when I landed, and my &#383;udden changes
+of countenance &#383;ince, have alarmed
+her &#383;o much, that &#383;he is perpetually
+afraid of &#383;ome accident&mdash;But it would
+have injured the child this warm &#383;ea&#383;on,
+as &#383;he is cutting her teeth.</p>
+
+<p>I hear not of your having written to
+me at &mdash;&mdash;. Very well! Act as you
+plea&#383;e&mdash;there is nothing I fear or care
+for! When I &#383;ee whether I can, or
+cannot obtain the money I am come
+here about, I will not trouble you
+with letters to which you do not reply.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-172_S" id="CPg_3-172_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-172.png">172</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LIX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 18.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> here in &mdash;&mdash;, &#383;eparated
+from my child&mdash;and here I mu&#383;t remain
+a month at lea&#383;t, or I might as well
+never have come.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I have begun &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; which will,
+I hope, di&#383;charge all my obligations
+of a pecuniary kind.&mdash;I am lowered in
+my own eyes, on account of my not
+having done it &#383;ooner.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall make no further comments on
+your &#383;ilence. God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-173_S" id="CPg_3-173_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-173.png">173</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">July 30.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t received two of your
+letters, dated the 26th and 30th of June;
+and you mu&#383;t have received &#383;everal
+from me, informing you of my detention,
+and how much I was hurt by
+your &#383;ilence.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Write to me then, my friend, and
+write explicitly. I have &#383;uffered, God
+knows, &#383;ince I left you. Ah! you have
+never felt this kind of &#383;ickne&#383;s of heart!&mdash;My
+mind however is at pre&#383;ent
+painfully active, and the &#383;ympathy I<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-174_S" id="CPg_3-174_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-174.png">174</a>]</span>
+feel almo&#383;t ri&#383;es to agony. But this is
+not a &#383;ubject of complaint, it has afforded
+me plea&#383;ure,&mdash;and reflected
+plea&#383;ure is all I have to hope for&mdash;if a
+&#383;park of hope be yet alive in my forlorn
+bo&#383;om.</p>
+
+<p>I will try to write with a degree of
+compo&#383;ure. I wi&#383;h for us to live together,
+becau&#383;e I want you to acquire an
+habitual tenderne&#383;s for my poor girl.
+I cannot bear to think of leaving her
+alone in the world, or that &#383;he &#383;hould
+only be protected by your &#383;en&#383;e of duty.
+Next to pre&#383;erving her, my mo&#383;t earne&#383;t
+wi&#383;h is not to di&#383;turb your peace. I
+have nothing to expect, and little to
+fear, in life&mdash;There are wounds that
+can never be healed&mdash;but they may be
+allowed to fe&#383;ter in &#383;ilence without
+wincing.</p>
+
+<p>When we meet again, you &#383;hall be<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-175_S" id="CPg_3-175_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-175.png">175</a>]</span>
+convinced that I have more re&#383;olution
+than you give me credit for. I will not
+torment you. If I am de&#383;tined always
+to be di&#383;appointed and unhappy, I will
+conceal the angui&#383;h I cannot di&#383;&#383;ipate;
+and the tightened cord of life or rea&#383;on
+will at la&#383;t &#383;nap, and &#383;et me free.</p>
+
+<p>Yes; I &#383;hall be happy&mdash;This heart is
+worthy of the bli&#383;s its feelings anticipate&mdash;and
+I cannot even per&#383;uade my&#383;elf,
+wretched as they have made me,
+that my principles and &#383;entiments are
+not founded in nature and truth. But
+to have done with the&#383;e &#383;ubjects.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I have been &#383;eriou&#383;ly employed in this
+way &#383;ince I came to &mdash;&mdash;; yet I never
+was &#383;o much in the air.&mdash;I walk, I ride
+on hor&#383;eback&mdash;row, bathe, and even<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-176_S" id="CPg_3-176_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-176.png">176</a>]</span>
+&#383;leep in the fields; my health is con&#383;equently
+improved. The child, &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+informs me, is well. I long to be with
+her.</p>
+
+<p>Write to me immediately&mdash;were I
+only to think of my&#383;elf, I could wi&#383;h
+you to return to me, poor, with the &#383;implicity
+of character, part of which you
+&#383;eem lately to have lo&#383;t, that fir&#383;t attached
+to you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours mo&#383;t affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;* * * * *</p>
+
+<p>I have been &#383;ub&#383;cribing other letters&mdash;&#383;o
+I mechanically did the &#383;ame to
+yours.</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-177_S" id="CPg_3-177_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-177.png">177</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Augu&#383;t 5.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Employment</span> and exerci&#383;e have
+been of great &#383;ervice to me; and I have
+entirely recovered the &#383;trength and activity
+I lo&#383;t during the time of my nur&#383;ing.
+I have &#383;eldom been in better
+health; and my mind, though trembling
+to the touch of angui&#383;h, is calmer&mdash;yet
+&#383;till the &#383;ame.&mdash;I have, it is true,
+enjoyed &#383;ome tranquillity, and more happine&#383;s
+here, than for a long&mdash;long
+time pa&#383;t.&mdash;(I &#383;ay happine&#383;s, for I can
+give no other appellation to the exqui&#383;ite
+delight this wild country and fine
+&#383;ummer have afforded me.)&mdash;Still, on examining
+my heart, I find that it is &#383;o<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-178_S" id="CPg_3-178_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-178.png">178</a>]</span>
+con&#383;tituted, I cannot live without &#383;ome
+particular affection&mdash;I am afraid not
+without a pa&#383;&#383;ion&mdash;and I feel the want
+of it more in &#383;ociety, than in &#383;olitude&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Writing to you, whenever an affectionate
+epithet occurs&mdash;my eyes fill
+with tears, and my trembling hand
+&#383;tops&mdash;you may then depend on my re&#383;olution,
+when with you. If I am
+doomed to be unhappy, I will confine
+my angui&#383;h in my own bo&#383;om&mdash;tenderne&#383;s,
+rather than pa&#383;&#383;ion, has made me
+&#383;ometimes overlook delicacy&mdash;the &#383;ame
+tenderne&#383;s will in future re&#383;train me.
+God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-179_S" id="CPg_3-179_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-179.png">179</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Augu&#383;t 7.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Air</span>, exerci&#383;e, and bathing, have
+re&#383;tored me to health, braced my mu&#383;cles,
+and covered my ribs, even whil&#383;t
+I have recovered my former activity.&mdash;I
+cannot tell you that my mind is calm,
+though I have &#383;natched &#383;ome moments
+of exqui&#383;ite delight, wandering through
+the woods, and re&#383;ting on the rocks.</p>
+
+<p>This &#383;tate of &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e, my friend, is
+intolerable; we mu&#383;t determine on
+&#383;omething&mdash;and &#383;oon;&mdash;we mu&#383;t meet
+&#383;hortly, or part for ever. I am &#383;en&#383;ible
+that I acted fooli&#383;hly&mdash;but I was
+wretched&mdash;when we were together&mdash;Expecting
+too much, I let the plea&#383;ure<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-180_S" id="CPg_3-180_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-180.png">180</a>]</span>
+I might have caught, &#383;lip from me. I
+cannot live with you&mdash;I ought not&mdash;if
+you form another attachment. But I
+promi&#383;e you, mine &#383;hall not be intruded
+on you. Little rea&#383;on have I to expect
+a &#383;hadow of happine&#383;s, after the cruel
+di&#383;appointments that have rent my
+heart; but that of my child &#383;eems to
+depend on our being together. Still I
+do not wi&#383;h you to &#383;acrifice a chance of
+enjoyment for an uncertain good. I
+feel a conviction, that I can provide
+for her, and it &#383;hall be my object&mdash;if
+we are indeed to part to meet no more.
+Her affection mu&#383;t not be divided. She
+mu&#383;t be a comfort to me&mdash;if I am to
+have no other&mdash;and only know me as
+her &#383;upport.&mdash;I feel that I cannot endure
+the angui&#383;h of corre&#383;ponding
+with you&mdash;if we are only to corre&#383;pond.&mdash;No;
+if you &#383;eek for happi<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-181_S" id="CPg_3-181_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-181.png">181</a>]</span>ne&#383;s
+el&#383;ewhere, my letters &#383;hall not interrupt
+your repo&#383;e. I will be dead to
+you. I cannot expre&#383;s to you what
+pain it gives me to write about an eternal
+&#383;eparation.&mdash;You mu&#383;t determine&mdash;examine
+your&#383;elf&mdash;But, for God's &#383;ake!
+&#383;pare me the anxiety of uncertainty!&mdash;I
+may &#383;ink under the trial; but I will
+not complain.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! If I had any thing more to
+&#383;ay to you, it is all flown, and ab&#383;orbed
+by the mo&#383;t tormenting apprehen&#383;ions,
+yet I &#383;carcely know what new form of
+mi&#383;ery I have to dread.</p>
+
+<p>I ought to beg your pardon for having
+&#383;ometimes written peevi&#383;hly; but
+you will impute it to affection, if you
+under&#383;tand any thing of the heart of</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours truly &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-182_S" id="CPg_3-182_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-182.png">182</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Augu&#383;t 9.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Five</span> of your letters have been &#383;ent
+after me from &mdash;&mdash;. One, dated the
+14th of July, was written in a &#383;tyle
+which I may have merited, but did
+not expect from you. However this
+is not a time to reply to it, except to
+a&#383;&#383;ure you that you &#383;hall not be tormented
+with any more complaints. I
+am di&#383;gu&#383;ted with my&#383;elf for having &#383;o
+long importuned you with my affection.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>My child is very well. We &#383;hall &#383;oon
+meet, to part no more, I hope&mdash;I mean,
+I and my girl.&mdash;I &#383;hall wait with &#383;ome<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-183_S" id="CPg_3-183_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-183.png">183</a>]</span>
+degree of anxiety till I am informed
+how your affairs terminate.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Augu&#383;t 26.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I arrived</span> here la&#383;t night, and with
+the mo&#383;t exqui&#383;ite delight, once more
+pre&#383;&#383;ed my babe to my heart. We
+&#383;hall part no more. You perhaps cannot
+conceive the plea&#383;ure it gave me, to
+&#383;ee her run about, and play alone. Her
+increa&#383;ing intelligence attaches me more
+and more to her. I have promi&#383;ed her that
+I will fulfil my duty to her; and nothing<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-184_S" id="CPg_3-184_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-184.png">184</a>]</span>
+in future &#383;hall make me forget it. I
+will al&#383;o exert my&#383;elf to obtain an independence
+for her; but I will not be
+too anxious on this head.</p>
+
+<p>I have already told you, that I have
+recovered my health. Vigour, and
+even vivacity of mind, have returned
+with a renovated con&#383;titution. As for
+peace, we will not talk of it. I was
+not made, perhaps, to enjoy the calm
+contentment &#383;o termed.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>You tell me that my letters torture
+you; I will not de&#383;cribe the effect
+yours have on me. I received
+three this morning, the la&#383;t dated the
+7th of this month. I mean not to give
+vent to the emotions they produced.<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-185_S" id="CPg_3-185_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-185.png">185</a>]</span>&mdash;Certainly
+you are right; our minds are
+not congenial. I have lived in an ideal
+world, and fo&#383;tered &#383;entiments that you
+do not comprehend&mdash;or you would not
+treat me thus. I am not, I will not
+be, merely an object of compa&#383;&#383;ion&mdash;a
+clog, however light, to teize you. Forget
+that I exi&#383;t: I will never remind
+you. Something emphatical whi&#383;pers
+me to put an end to the&#383;e &#383;truggles.
+Be free&mdash;I will not torment, when I
+cannot plea&#383;e. I can take care of my
+child; you need not continually tell me
+that our fortune is in&#383;eparable, <i>that you
+will try to cheri&#383;h tenderne&#383;s</i> for me. Do
+no violence to your&#383;elf! When we are
+&#383;eparated, our intere&#383;t, &#383;ince you give
+&#383;o much weight to pecuniary con&#383;iderations,
+will be entirely divided. I want
+not protection without affection; and
+&#383;upport I need not, whil&#383;t my faculties<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-186_S" id="CPg_3-186_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-186.png">186</a>]</span>
+are undi&#383;turbed. I had a di&#383;like to living
+in England; but painful feelings
+mu&#383;t give way to &#383;uperior con&#383;iderations.
+I may not be able to acquire
+the &#383;um nece&#383;&#383;ary to maintain my child
+and &#383;elf el&#383;ewhere. It is too late to go to
+Switzerland. I &#383;hall not remain at &mdash;&mdash;,
+living expen&#383;ively. But be not alarmed!
+I &#383;hall not force my&#383;elf on you any
+more.</p>
+
+<p>Adieu! I am agitated&mdash;my whole
+frame is convul&#383;ed&mdash;my lips tremble,
+as if &#383;hook by cold, though fire &#383;eems to
+be circulating in my veins.</p>
+
+<p>God ble&#383;s you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-187_S" id="CPg_3-187_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-187.png">187</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 6.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I received</span> ju&#383;t now your letter of the
+20th. I had written you a letter la&#383;t
+night, into which imperceptibly &#383;lipt
+&#383;ome of my bitterne&#383;s of &#383;oul. I will
+copy the part relative to bu&#383;ine&#383;s. I
+am not &#383;ufficiently vain to imagine that
+I can, for more than a moment, cloud
+your enjoyment of life&mdash;to prevent
+even that, you had better never hear
+from me&mdash;and repo&#383;e on the idea that
+I am happy.</p>
+
+<p>Gracious God! It is impo&#383;&#383;ible for
+me to &#383;tifle &#383;omething like re&#383;entment,
+when I receive fre&#383;h proofs of your in<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-188_S" id="CPg_3-188_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-188.png">188</a>]</span>difference.
+What I have &#383;uffered this
+la&#383;t year, is not to be forgotten! I
+have not that happy &#383;ub&#383;titute for wi&#383;dom,
+in&#383;en&#383;ibility&mdash;and the lively &#383;ympathies
+which bind me to my fellow-creatures,
+are all of a painful kind.&mdash;They
+are the agonies of a broken heart&mdash;plea&#383;ure
+and I have &#383;haken hands.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;ee here nothing but heaps of ruins,
+and only conver&#383;e with people immer&#383;ed
+in trade and &#383;en&#383;uality.</p>
+
+<p>I am weary of travelling&mdash;yet &#383;eem
+to have no home&mdash;no re&#383;ting place to
+look to.&mdash;I am &#383;trangely ca&#383;t off.&mdash;How
+often, pa&#383;&#383;ing through the rocks, I have
+thought, "But for this child, I would
+lay my head on one of them, and never
+open my eyes again!" With a heart
+feelingly alive to all the affections of
+my nature&mdash;I have never met with one,
+&#383;ofter than the &#383;tone that I would fain<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-189_S" id="CPg_3-189_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-189.png">189</a>]</span>
+take for my la&#383;t pillow. I once thought
+I had, but it was all a delu&#383;ion. I meet
+with families continually, who are
+bound together by affection or principle&mdash;and,
+when I am con&#383;cious that I
+have fulfilled the duties of my &#383;tation,
+almo&#383;t to a forgetfulne&#383;s of my&#383;elf, I
+am ready to demand, in a murmuring
+tone, of Heaven, "Why am I thus
+abandoned?"</p>
+
+<p>You &#383;ay now&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I do not under&#383;tand you. It is nece&#383;&#383;ary
+for you to write more explicitly&mdash;and
+determine on &#383;ome mode of conduct.&mdash;I
+cannot endure this &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e&mdash;Decide&mdash;Do
+you fear to &#383;trike another
+blow? We live together, or eternally
+part!&mdash;I &#383;hall not write to you again,
+till I receive an an&#383;wer to this. I mu&#383;t<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-190_S" id="CPg_3-190_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-190.png">190</a>]</span>
+compo&#383;e my tortured &#383;oul, before I
+write on indifferent &#383;ubjects.&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>I do not know whether I write intelligibly,
+for my head is di&#383;turbed.&mdash;But this
+you ought to pardon&mdash;for it is with difficulty
+frequently that I make out what
+you mean to &#383;ay&mdash;You write, I &#383;uppo&#383;e,
+at Mr. &mdash;&mdash;'s after dinner, when your
+head is not the cleare&#383;t&mdash;and as for your
+heart, if you have one, I &#383;ee nothing
+like the dictates of affection, unle&#383;s a
+glimp&#383;e when you mention, the child.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-191_S" id="CPg_3-191_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-191.png">191</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 25.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> ju&#383;t fini&#383;hed a letter, to be
+given in charge to captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;.
+In that I complained of your &#383;ilence,
+and expre&#383;&#383;ed my &#383;urpri&#383;e that three
+mails &#383;hould have arrived without
+bringing a line for me. Since I
+clo&#383;ed it, I hear of another, and &#383;till
+no letter.&mdash;I am labouring to write
+calmly&mdash;this &#383;ilence is a refinement on
+cruelty. Had captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; remained
+a few days longer, I would have
+returned with him to England. What
+have I to do here? I have repeatedly<span class='pagenum'><a name="CPg_3-192_S" id="CPg_3-192_S"></a>[<a href="images/v3-192.png">192</a>]</span>
+written to you fully. Do you do the
+&#383;ame&mdash;and quickly. Do not leave me
+in &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e. I have not de&#383;erved this
+of you. I cannot write, my mind is
+&#383;o di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;ed. Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+
+<h4>END VOL. III.</h4>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_4-A_12_S" id="CFootnote_4-A_12_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_4-A_12_S"><span class="label">[4-A]</span></a> The child is in a &#383;ub&#383;equent letter called the
+"barrier girl," probably from a &#383;uppo&#383;ition that
+&#383;he owed her exi&#383;tence to this interview.
+</p><p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_7-A_13_S" id="CFootnote_7-A_13_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_7-A_13_S"><span class="label">[7-A]</span></a> This and the thirteen following letters appear
+to have been written during a &#383;eparation of &#383;everal
+months; the date, Paris.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_27-A_14_S" id="CFootnote_27-A_14_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_27-A_14_S"><span class="label">[27-A]</span></a> Some further letters, written during the remainder
+of the week, in a &#383;imilar &#383;train to the
+preceding, appear to have been de&#383;troyed by the
+per&#383;on to whom they were addre&#383;&#383;ed.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_47-A_15_S" id="CFootnote_47-A_15_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_47-A_15_S"><span class="label">[47-A]</span></a> The child &#383;poken of in &#383;ome preceding letters,
+had now been born a con&#383;iderable time.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_50-A_16_S" id="CFootnote_50-A_16_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_50-A_16_S"><span class="label">[50-A]</span></a> She means, "the latter more than the former."
+</p><p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_58-A_17_S" id="CFootnote_58-A_17_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_58-A_17_S"><span class="label">[58-A]</span></a> This is the fir&#383;t of a &#383;eries of letters written
+during a &#383;eparation of many months, to which no
+cordial meeting ever &#383;ucceeded. They were &#383;ent
+from Paris, and bear the addre&#383;s of London.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_91-A_18_S" id="CFootnote_91-A_18_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_91-A_18_S"><span class="label">[91-A]</span></a> The per&#383;on to whom the letters are addre&#383;&#383;ed,
+was about this time at Ram&#383;gate, on his return,
+as he profe&#383;&#383;ed, to Paris, when he was recalled,
+as it &#383;hould &#383;eem, to London, by the further pre&#383;&#383;ure
+of bu&#383;ine&#383;s now accumulated upon him.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_100-A_19_S" id="CFootnote_100-A_19_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_100-A_19_S"><span class="label">[100-A]</span></a> This probably alludes to &#383;ome expre&#383;&#383;ion of
+the per&#383;on to whom the letters are addre&#383;&#383;ed, in
+which he treated as common evils, things upon
+which the letter writer was di&#383;po&#383;ed to be&#383;tow a
+different appellation.
+</p><p class="right"><span class="smcap">editor.</span></p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_133-A_20_S" id="CFootnote_133-A_20_S"></a><a href="#CFNanchor_133-A_20_S"><span class="label">[133-A]</span></a> This pa&#383;&#383;age refers to letters written under
+a purpo&#383;e of &#383;uicide, and not intended to be
+opened till after the cata&#383;trophe.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-i" id="DPg_4-i"></a>[<a href="images/v4-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-ii" id="DPg_4-ii"></a>[<a href="images/v4-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="V4" id="V4"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. IV.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-iii" id="DPg_4-iii"></a>[<a href="images/v4-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-iv" id="DPg_4-iv"></a>[<a href="images/v4-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>LETTERS</h1>
+<h3>AND</h3>
+<h1>MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.</h1>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. II.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-v" id="DPg_4-v"></a>[<a href="images/v4-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-vi" id="DPg_4-vi"></a>[<a href="images/v4-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="DV4_ERRATA" id="DV4_ERRATA"></a>ERRATA.</h2>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p>Page 10, line 8, <i>for</i> I write you, <i>read</i> I write to you.</p>
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; 20, &mdash; 9, <i>read</i> bring them to &mdash;&mdash;.</p>
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; 146, &mdash; 2 from the bottom, after over, insert a comma.</p></div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-vii" id="DPg_4-vii"></a>[<a href="images/v4-vii.png">vii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="DV4_CONTENTS" id="DV4_CONTENTS"></a>CONTENTS.</h2>
+
+<div class='centered'>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary="Vol IV Contents">
+<tr><td align='left'>&nbsp;</td><td align='right'>Page</td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Letters</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-1">1</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Letter on the Present Character of the French Nation</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-39">39</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Fragment of Letters on the Management of Infants</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-55">55</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Letters to Mr. Johnson</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-61">61</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Extract of the Cave of Fancy, a Tale</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-99">99</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>On Poetry and our Relish for the Beauties of Nature</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-159">159</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Hints</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-179">179</a></td></tr>
+</table></div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-1" id="DPg_4-1"></a>[<a href="images/v4-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2><a name="DV4_LETTERS" id="DV4_LETTERS"></a>LETTERS.</h2>
+
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 27.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> you receive this, I shall either
+have landed, or be hovering on
+the British coast&mdash;your letter of the 18th
+decided me.</p>
+
+<p>By what criterion of principle or affection,
+you term my questions extraordinary
+and unnecessary, I cannot determine.&mdash;You
+desire me to decide&mdash;I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-2" id="DPg_4-2"></a>[<a href="images/v4-2.png">2</a>]</span>
+had decided. You must have had long
+ago two letters of mine, from &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;,
+to the same purport, to consider.&mdash;In
+these, God knows! there was but too
+much affection, and the agonies of a
+distracted mind were but too faithfully
+pourtrayed!&mdash;What more then had
+I to say?&mdash;The negative was to come
+from you.&mdash;You had perpetually recurred
+to your promise of meeting me
+in the autumn&mdash;Was it extraordinary
+that I should demand a yes, or no?&mdash;Your
+letter is written with extreme
+harshness, coldness I am accustomed
+to, in it I find not a trace of the tenderness
+of humanity, much less of friendship.&mdash;I
+only see a desire to heave a
+load off your shoulders.</p>
+
+<p>I am above disputing about words.&mdash;It
+matters not in what terms you decide.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-3" id="DPg_4-3"></a>[<a href="images/v4-3.png">3</a>]</span>
+The tremendous power who formed
+this heart, must have foreseen that, in
+a world in which self-interest, in various
+shapes, is the principal mobile, I
+had little chance of escaping misery.&mdash;To
+the fiat of fate I submit.&mdash;I am content
+to be wretched; but I will not be
+contemptible.&mdash;Of me you have no
+cause to complain, but for having had
+too much regard for you&mdash;for having
+expected a degree of permanent happiness,
+when you only sought for a
+momentary gratification.</p>
+
+<p>I am strangely deficient in sagacity.&mdash;Uniting
+myself to you, your tenderness
+seemed to make me amends for all my
+former misfortunes.&mdash;On this tenderness
+and affection with what confidence
+did I rest!&mdash;but I leaned on a spear, that
+has pierced me to the heart.&mdash;You
+have thrown off a faithful friend, to<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-4" id="DPg_4-4"></a>[<a href="images/v4-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+pursue the caprices of the moment.&mdash;We
+certainly are differently organized;
+for even now, when conviction has
+been stamped on my soul by sorrow, I
+can scarcely believe it possible. It depends
+at present on you, whether you
+will see me or not.&mdash;I shall take no
+step, till I see or hear from you.</p>
+
+<p>Preparing myself for the worst&mdash;I
+have determined, if your next letter be
+like the last, to write to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+to procure me an obscure lodging, and
+not to inform any body of my arrival.&mdash;There
+I will endeavour in a few months
+to obtain the sum necessary to take me
+to France&mdash;from you I will not receive
+any more.&mdash;I am not yet sufficiently
+humbled to depend on your beneficence.</p>
+
+<p>Some people, whom my unhappiness
+has interested, though they know<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-5" id="DPg_4-5"></a>[<a href="images/v4-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+not the extent of it, will assist me to
+attain the object I have in view, the
+independence of my child. Should a
+peace take place, ready money will go
+a great way in France&mdash;and I will borrow
+a sum, which my industry <i>shall</i>
+enable me to pay at my leisure, to purchase
+a small estate for my girl.&mdash;The
+assistance I shall find necessary to complete
+her education, I can get at an
+easy rate at Paris&mdash;I can introduce her
+to such society as she will like&mdash;and
+thus, securing for her all the chance
+for happiness, which depends on me, I
+shall die in peace, persuaded that the
+felicity which has hitherto cheated
+my expectation, will not always elude
+my grasp. No poor tempest-tossed
+mariner ever more earnestly longed to
+arrive at his port.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-6" id="DPg_4-6"></a>[<a href="images/v4-6.png">6</a>]</span></p>
+<p>I shall not come up in the vessel all
+the way, because I have no place to go
+to. Captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; will inform you
+where I am. It is needless to add, that
+I am not in a state of mind to bear suspense&mdash;and
+that I wish to see you,
+though it be for the last time.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday, October 4.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wrote</span> to you by the packet, to
+inform you, that your letter of the 18th
+of last month, had determined me to
+set out with captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;; but, as
+we sailed very quick, I take it for
+granted, that you have not yet received
+it.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-7" id="DPg_4-7"></a>[<a href="images/v4-7.png">7</a>]</span>
+You say, I must decide for myself.&mdash;I
+had decided, that it was most for the
+interest of my little girl, and for my
+own comfort, little as I expect, for us
+to live together; and I even thought
+that you would be glad, some years
+hence, when the tumult of business was
+over, to repose in the society of an affectionate
+friend, and mark the progress
+of our interesting child, whilst endeavouring
+to be of use in the circle you
+at last resolved to rest in; for you cannot
+run about for ever.</p>
+
+<p>From the tenour of your last letter
+however, I am led to imagine, that you
+have formed some new attachment.&mdash;If
+it be so, let me earnestly request you
+to see me once more, and immediately.
+This is the only proof I require of the
+friendship you profess for me. I will<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-8" id="DPg_4-8"></a>[<a href="images/v4-8.png">8</a>]</span>
+then decide, since you boggle about a
+mere form.</p>
+
+<p>I am labouring to write with calmness&mdash;but
+the extreme anguish I feel,
+at landing without having any friend
+to receive me, and even to be conscious
+that the friend whom I most wish
+to see, will feel a disagreeable sensation
+at being informed of my arrival, does
+not come under the description of common
+misery. Every emotion yields to
+an overwhelming flood of sorrow&mdash;and
+the playfulness of my child distresses
+me.&mdash;On her account, I wished
+to remain a few days here, comfortless
+as is my situation.&mdash;Besides, I did not
+wish to surprise you. You have told
+me, that you would make any sacrifice
+to promote my happiness&mdash;and, even in
+your last unkind letter, you talk of the
+ties which bind you to me and my<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-9" id="DPg_4-9"></a>[<a href="images/v4-9.png">9</a>]</span>
+child.&mdash;Tell me, that you wish it, and
+I will cut this Gordian knot.</p>
+
+<p>I now most earnestly intreat you to
+write to me, without fail, by the return
+of the post. Direct your letter to
+be left at the post-office, and tell me
+whether you will come to me here, or
+where you will meet me. I can receive
+your letter on Wednesday morning.</p>
+
+<p>Do not keep me in suspense.&mdash;I expect
+nothing from you, or any human
+being: my die is cast!&mdash;I have fortitude
+enough to determine to do my
+duty; yet I cannot raise my depressed
+spirits, or calm my trembling heart.&mdash;That
+being who moulded it thus,
+knows that I am unable to tear up by
+the roots the propensity to affection
+which has been the torment of my life&mdash;but
+life will have an end!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-10" id="DPg_4-10"></a>[<a href="images/v4-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+Should you come here (a few months
+ago I could not have doubted it) you
+will find me at &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. If you prefer
+meeting me on the road, tell me where.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXIX</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I write</span> you now on my knees; imploring
+you to send my child and the
+maid with &mdash;&mdash;, to Paris, to be consigned
+to the care of Madame &mdash;&mdash;, rue
+&mdash;&mdash;, section de &mdash;&mdash;. Should they be
+removed, &mdash;&mdash; can give their direction.</p>
+
+<p>Let the maid have all my clothes,
+without distinction.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-11" id="DPg_4-11"></a>[<a href="images/v4-11.png">11</a>]</span>
+Pray pay the cook her wages, and do
+not mention the confession which I
+forced from her&mdash;a little sooner or later
+is of no consequence. Nothing but
+my extreme stupidity could have rendered
+me blind so long. Yet, whilst
+you assured me that you had no attachment,
+I thought we might still
+have lived together.</p>
+
+<p>I shall make no comments on your
+conduct; or any appeal to the world.
+Let my wrongs sleep with me! Soon,
+very soon shall I be at peace. When
+you receive this, my burning head will
+be cold.</p>
+
+<p>I would encounter a thousand deaths,
+rather than a night like the last. Your
+treatment has thrown my mind into a
+state of chaos; yet I am serene. I go
+to find comfort, and my only fear is,
+that my poor body will be insulted by<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-12" id="DPg_4-12"></a>[<a href="images/v4-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+an endeavour to recal my hated existence.
+But I shall plunge into the
+Thames where there is the least chance
+of my being snatched from the death I
+seek.</p>
+
+<p>God bless you! May you never know
+by experience what you have made me
+endure. Should your sensibility ever
+awake, remorse will find its way to your
+heart; and, in the midst of business and
+sensual pleasure, I shall appear before
+you, the victim of your deviation from
+rectitude.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-13" id="DPg_4-13"></a>[<a href="images/v4-13.png">13</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> only to lament, that, when
+the bitterness of death was past, I was
+inhumanly brought back to life and
+misery. But a fixed determination is
+not to be baffled by disappointment;
+nor will I allow that to be a frantic attempt,
+which was one of the calmest
+acts of reason. In this respect, I am
+only accountable to myself. Did I
+care for what is termed reputation, it
+is by other circumstances that I should
+be dishonoured.</p>
+
+<p>You say, "that you know not how to
+extricate ourselves out of the wretchedness
+into which we have been plunged."<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-14" id="DPg_4-14"></a>[<a href="images/v4-14.png">14</a>]</span>
+You are extricated long since.&mdash;But I
+forbear to comment.&mdash;&mdash;If I am condemned
+to live longer, it is a living
+death.</p>
+
+<p>It appears to me, that you lay much
+more stress on delicacy, than on principle;
+for I am unable to discover what
+sentiment of delicacy would have been
+violated, by your visiting a wretched
+friend&mdash;if indeed you have any friendship
+for me.&mdash;But since your new attachment
+is the only thing sacred in
+your eyes, I am silent&mdash;Be happy! My
+complaints shall never more damp your
+enjoyment&mdash;perhaps I am mistaken in
+supposing that even my death could, for
+more than a moment.&mdash;This is what
+you call magnanimity&mdash;It is happy for
+yourself, that you possess this quality in
+the highest degree.</p>
+
+<p>Your continually asserting, that you<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-15" id="DPg_4-15"></a>[<a href="images/v4-15.png">15</a>]</span>
+will do all in your power to contribute
+to my comfort (when you only allude
+to pecuniary assistance), appears to me
+a flagrant breach of delicacy.&mdash;I want
+not such vulgar comfort, nor will I
+accept it. I never wanted but your
+heart&mdash;That gone, you have nothing
+more to give. Had I only poverty to
+fear, I should not shrink from life.&mdash;Forgive
+me then, if I say, that I shall
+consider any direct or indirect attempt
+to supply my necessities, as an insult
+which I have not merited&mdash;and as
+rather done out of tenderness for your
+own reputation, than for me. Do not
+mistake me; I do not think that you
+value money (therefore I will not accept
+what you do not care for)
+though I do much less, because certain
+privations are not painful to me.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-16" id="DPg_4-16"></a>[<a href="images/v4-16.png">16</a>]</span>
+When I am dead, respect for yourself
+will make you take care of the child.</p>
+
+<p>I write with difficulty&mdash;probably I
+shall never write to you again.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<p>God bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> compelled at last to say that
+you treat me ungenerously. I agree
+with you, that</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-17" id="DPg_4-17"></a>[<a href="images/v4-17.png">17</a>]</span></p>
+<p>But let the obliquity now fall on me.&mdash;I
+fear neither poverty nor infamy. I am
+unequal to the task of writing&mdash;and
+explanations are not necessary.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>My child may have to blush for her
+mother's want of prudence&mdash;and may
+lament that the rectitude of my heart
+made me above vulgar precautions;
+but she shall not despise me for meanness.&mdash;You
+are now perfectly free.&mdash;God
+bless you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-18" id="DPg_4-18"></a>[<a href="images/v4-18.png">18</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXXIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been hurt by indirect enquiries,
+which appear to me not to be
+dictated by any tenderness to me.&mdash;You
+ask "If I am well or tranquil?"&mdash;They
+who think me so, must want a heart to
+estimate my feelings by.&mdash;I chuse
+then to be the organ of my own sentiments.</p>
+
+<p>I must tell you, that I am very much
+mortified by your continually offering
+me pecuniary assistance&mdash;and, considering
+your going to the new house, as an
+open avowal that you abandon me, let<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-19" id="DPg_4-19"></a>[<a href="images/v4-19.png">19</a>]</span>
+me tell you that I will sooner perish
+than receive any thing from you&mdash;and
+I say this at the moment when I am
+disappointed in my first attempt to obtain
+a temporary supply. But this
+even pleases me; an accumulation of
+disappointments and misfortunes seems
+to suit the habit of my mind.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Have but a little patience, and I will
+remove myself where it will not be
+necessary for you to talk&mdash;of course,
+not to think of me. But let me see,
+written by yourself&mdash;for I will not receive
+it through any other medium&mdash;that
+the affair is finished.&mdash;It is an insult
+to me to suppose, that I can be reconciled,
+or recover my spirits; but,
+if you hear nothing of me, it will be
+the same thing to you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-20" id="DPg_4-20"></a>[<a href="images/v4-20.png">20</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Even your seeing me, has been to
+oblige other people, and not to sooth
+my distracted mind.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thursday Afternoon.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Mr.</span> &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; having forgot to desire
+you to send the things of mine which
+were left at the house, I have to request
+you to let &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; bring them onto
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;.</p>
+
+<p>I shall go this evening to the lodging;
+so you need not be restrained from
+coming here to transact your business.&mdash;And,
+whatever I may think, and feel<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-21" id="DPg_4-21"></a>[<a href="images/v4-21.png">21</a>]</span>&mdash;you
+need not fear that I shall publicly
+complain&mdash;No! If I have any criterion
+to judge of right and wrong, I have
+been most ungenerously treated: but,
+wishing now only to hide myself, I shall
+be silent as the grave in which I long
+to forget myself. I shall protect and
+provide for my child.&mdash;I only mean by
+this to say, that you having nothing
+to fear from my desperation.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Farewel. &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-22" id="DPg_4-22"></a>[<a href="images/v4-22.png">22</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">London, November 27.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> letter, without an address,
+which you put up with the letters you
+returned, did not meet my eyes till
+just now.&mdash;I had thrown the letters
+aside&mdash;I did not wish to look over a
+register of sorrow.</p>
+
+<p>My not having seen it, will account
+for my having written to you with
+anger&mdash;under the impression your departure,
+without even a line left for me,
+made on me, even after your late conduct,
+which could not lead me to expect
+much attention to my sufferings.</p>
+
+<p>In fact, "the decided conduct, which<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-23" id="DPg_4-23"></a>[<a href="images/v4-23.png">23</a>]</span>
+appeared to me so unfeeling," has almost
+overturned my reason; my mind
+is injured&mdash;I scarcely know where I
+am, or what I do.&mdash;The grief I cannot
+conquer (for some cruel recollections
+never quit me, banishing almost every
+other) I labour to conceal in total
+solitude.&mdash;My life therefore is but an
+exercise of fortitude, continually on
+the stretch&mdash;and hope never gleams in
+this tomb, where I am buried alive.</p>
+
+<p>But I meant to reason with you, and
+not to complain.&mdash;You tell me, "that I
+shall judge more coolly of your mode
+of acting, some time hence." But is it
+not possible that <i>passion</i> clouds your reason,
+as much as it does mine?&mdash;and
+ought you not to doubt, whether those
+principles are so "exalted," as you
+term them, which only lead to your
+own gratification? In other words,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-24" id="DPg_4-24"></a>[<a href="images/v4-24.png">24</a>]</span>
+whether it be just to have no principle
+of action, but that of following your
+inclination, trampling on the affection
+you have fostered, and the expectations
+you have excited?</p>
+
+<p>My affection for you is rooted in my
+heart.&mdash;I know you are not what you
+now seem&mdash;nor will you always act, or
+feel, as you now do, though I may
+never be comforted by the change.&mdash;Even
+at Paris, my image will haunt
+you.&mdash;You will see my pale face&mdash;and
+sometimes the tears of anguish will
+drop on your heart, which you have
+forced from mine.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot write. I thought I could
+quickly have refuted all your <i>ingenious</i>
+arguments; but my head is confused.&mdash;Right
+or wrong, I am miserable!</p>
+
+<p>It seems to me, that my conduct has
+always been governed by the strictest
+principles of justice and truth.&mdash;Yet,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-25" id="DPg_4-25"></a>[<a href="images/v4-25.png">25</a>]</span>
+how wretched have my social feelings,
+and delicacy of sentiment rendered me!&mdash;I
+have loved with my whole soul,
+only to discover that I had no chance
+of a return&mdash;and that existence is a
+burthen without it.</p>
+
+<p>I do not perfectly understand you.&mdash;If,
+by the offer of your friendship, you
+still only mean pecuniary support&mdash;I
+must again reject it.&mdash;Trifling are the
+ills of poverty in the scale of my misfortunes.&mdash;God
+bless you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I have been treated ungenerously&mdash;if
+I understand what is generosity.&mdash;&mdash;You
+seem to me only to have been
+anxious to shake me off&mdash;regardless
+whether you dashed me to atoms by
+the fall.&mdash;In truth I have been rudely
+handled. <i>Do you judge coolly</i>, and I trust<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-26" id="DPg_4-26"></a>[<a href="images/v4-26.png">26</a>]</span>
+you will not continue to call those capricious
+feelings "the most refined,"
+which would undermine not only the
+most sacred principles, but the affections
+which unite mankind.&mdash;&mdash;You
+would render mothers unnatural&mdash;and
+there would be no such thing as a father!&mdash;If
+your theory of morals is the
+most "exalted," it is certainly the most
+easy.&mdash;It does not require much magnanimity,
+to determine to please ourselves
+for the moment, let others suffer
+what they will!</p>
+
+<p>Excuse me for again tormenting you,
+my heart thirsts for justice from you&mdash;and
+whilst I recollect that you approved
+Miss &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s conduct&mdash;I am convinced
+you will not always justify your
+own.</p>
+
+<p>Beware of the deceptions of passion!
+It will not always banish from your<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-27" id="DPg_4-27"></a>[<a href="images/v4-27.png">27</a>]</span>
+mind, that you have acted ignobly&mdash;and
+condescended to subterfuge to
+gloss over the conduct you could not
+excuse.&mdash;Do truth and principle require
+such sacrifices?</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">London, December 8.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Having</span> just been informed that
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; is to return immediately to
+Paris, I would not miss a sure opportunity
+of writing, because I am not
+certain that my last, by Dover has
+reached you.</p>
+
+<p>Resentment, and even anger, are
+momentary emotions with me&mdash;and<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-28" id="DPg_4-28"></a>[<a href="images/v4-28.png">28</a>]</span>
+I wished to tell you so, that if you ever
+think of me, it may not be in the light
+of an enemy.</p>
+
+<p>That I have not been used <i>well</i> I
+must ever feel; perhaps, not always
+with the keen anguish I do at present&mdash;for
+I began even now to write calmly,
+and I cannot restrain my tears.</p>
+
+<p>I am stunned!&mdash;Your late conduct
+still appears to me a frightful dream.&mdash;Ah!
+ask yourself if you have not condescended
+to employ a little address, I
+could almost say cunning, unworthy of
+you?&mdash;Principles are sacred things&mdash;and
+we never play with truth, with
+impunity.</p>
+
+<p>The expectation (I have too fondly
+nourished it) of regaining your affection,
+every day grows fainter and
+fainter.&mdash;Indeed, it seems to me, when
+I am more sad than usual, that I shall<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-29" id="DPg_4-29"></a>[<a href="images/v4-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+never see you more.&mdash;Yet you will not
+always forget me.&mdash;You will feel something
+like remorse, for having lived only
+for yourself&mdash;and sacrificed my peace
+to inferior gratifications. In a comfortless
+old age, you will remember
+that you had one disinterested friend,
+whose heart you wounded to the quick.
+The hour of recollection will come&mdash;and
+you will not be satisfied to act the
+part of a boy, till you fall into that of a
+dotard. I know that your mind, your
+heart, and your principles of action,
+are all superior to your present conduct.
+You do, you must, respect me&mdash;and
+you will be sorry to forfeit my esteem.</p>
+
+<p>You know best whether I am still
+preserving the remembrance of an
+imaginary being.&mdash;I once thought that
+I knew you thoroughly&mdash;but now I
+am obliged to leave some doubts that<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-30" id="DPg_4-30"></a>[<a href="images/v4-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+involuntarily press on me, to be cleared
+up by time.</p>
+
+<p>You may render me unhappy; but
+cannot make me contemptible in my
+own eyes.&mdash;I shall still be able to support
+my child, though I am disappointed
+in some other plans of usefulness,
+which I once believed would have afforded
+you equal pleasure.</p>
+
+<p>Whilst I was with you, I restrained
+my natural generosity, because I thought
+your property in jeopardy.&mdash;When I
+went to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, I requested you, <i>if you
+could conveniently</i>, not to forget my father,
+sisters, and some other people,
+whom I was interested about.&mdash;Money
+was lavished away, yet not only my
+requests were neglected, but some trifling
+debts were not discharged, that
+now come on me.&mdash;Was this friendship&mdash;or
+generosity? Will you not grant<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-31" id="DPg_4-31"></a>[<a href="images/v4-31.png">31</a>]</span>
+you have forgotten yourself? Still
+I have an affection for you.&mdash;God
+bless you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXVII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> the parting from you for ever is
+the most serious event of my life, I will
+once expostulate with you, and call
+not the language of truth and feeling
+ingenuity!</p>
+
+<p>I know the soundness of your understanding&mdash;and
+know that it is impossible
+for you always to confound the
+caprices of every wayward inclination
+with the manly dictates of principle.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-32" id="DPg_4-32"></a>[<a href="images/v4-32.png">32</a>]</span>
+You tell me "that I torment you."&mdash;Why
+do I?&mdash;&mdash;Because you cannot
+estrange your heart entirely from me&mdash;and
+you feel that justice is on my side.
+You urge, "that your conduct was
+unequivocal."&mdash;It was not.&mdash;When
+your coolness has hurt me, with what
+tenderness have you endeavoured to
+remove the impression!&mdash;and even before
+I returned to England, you took
+great pains to convince me, that all
+my uneasiness was occasioned by the
+effect of a worn-out constitution&mdash;and
+you concluded your letter with these
+words, "Business alone has kept me
+from you.&mdash;Come to any port, and I
+will fly down to my two dear girls
+with a heart all their own."</p>
+
+<p>With these assurances, is it extraordinary
+that I should believe what I
+wished? I might&mdash;and did think that<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-33" id="DPg_4-33"></a>[<a href="images/v4-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+you had a struggle with old propensities;
+but I still thought that I and virtue
+should at last prevail. I still thought
+that you had a magnanimity of character,
+which would enable you to conquer
+yourself.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, believe me, it is not
+romance, you have acknowledged to
+me feelings of this kind.&mdash;You could
+restore me to life and hope, and the
+satisfaction you would feel, would
+amply repay you.</p>
+
+<p>In tearing myself from you, it is my
+own heart I pierce&mdash;and the time will
+come, when you will lament that you
+have thrown away a heart, that, even
+in the moment of passion, you cannot
+despise.&mdash;I would owe every thing to
+your generosity&mdash;but, for God's sake,
+keep me no longer in suspense!&mdash;Let
+me see you once more!<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-34" id="DPg_4-34"></a>[<a href="images/v4-34.png">34</a>]</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXVIII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> must do as you please with
+respect to the child.&mdash;I could wish that
+it might be done soon, that my name
+may be no more mentioned to you.
+It is now finished.&mdash;Convinced that you
+have neither regard nor friendship, I
+disdain to utter a reproach, though I
+have had reason to think, that the
+"forbearance" talked of, has not been
+very delicate.&mdash;It is however of no
+consequence.&mdash;I am glad you are satisfied
+with your own conduct.</p>
+
+<p>I now solemnly assure you, that this is
+an eternal farewel.&mdash;Yet I flinch not
+from the duties which tie me to life.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-35" id="DPg_4-35"></a>[<a href="images/v4-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+That there is "sophistry" on one
+side or other, is certain; but now it
+matters not on which. On my part it
+has not been a question of words. Yet
+your understanding or mine must be
+strangely warped&mdash;for what you term
+"delicacy," appears to me to be exactly
+the contrary. I have no criterion
+for morality, and have thought in vain,
+if the sensations which lead you to follow
+an ancle or step, be the sacred
+foundation of principle and affection.
+Mine has been of a very different nature,
+or it would not have stood the
+brunt of your sarcasms.</p>
+
+<p>The sentiment in me is still sacred.
+If there be any part of me that will
+survive the sense of my misfortunes, it
+is the purity of my affections. The
+impetuosity of your senses, may have
+led you to term mere animal desire, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-36" id="DPg_4-36"></a>[<a href="images/v4-36.png">36</a>]</span>
+source of principle; and it may give
+zest to some years to come.&mdash;Whether
+you will always think so, I shall never
+know.</p>
+
+<p>It is strange that, in spite of all you
+do, something like conviction forces me
+to believe, that you are not what you
+appear to be.</p>
+
+<p>I part with you in peace.</p>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-37" id="DPg_4-37"></a>[<a href="images/v4-37.png">37</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>LETTER</h2>
+<h4>ON THE</h4>
+<h2>PRESENT CHARACTER</h2>
+<h4>OF THE</h4>
+<h2>FRENCH NATION.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-38" id="DPg_4-38"></a>[<a href="images/v4-38.png">38</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-39" id="DPg_4-39"></a>[<a href="images/v4-39.png">39</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h3><a name="LETTER" id="DLETTER"></a>LETTER</h3>
+
+<h3><i>Introductory to a Series of Letters on the Present
+Character of the French Nation.</i></h3>
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p class="right">Paris, February 15, 1793.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear friend,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is necessary perhaps for an observer
+of mankind, to guard as carefully the
+remembrance of the first impression
+made by a nation, as by a countenance;
+because we imperceptibly lose sight of
+the national character, when we become
+more intimate with individuals.
+It is not then useless or presumptuous
+to note, that, when I first entered Paris,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-40" id="DPg_4-40"></a>[<a href="images/v4-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+the striking contrast of riches and poverty,
+elegance and slovenliness, urbanity
+and deceit, every where caught
+my eye, and saddened my soul; and
+these impressions are still the foundation
+of my remarks on the manners, which
+flatter the senses, more than they interest
+the heart, and yet excite more interest
+than esteem.</p>
+
+<p>The whole mode of life here tends
+indeed to render the people frivolous,
+and, to borrow their favourite epithet,
+amiable. Ever on the wing, they are
+always sipping the sparkling joy on the
+brim of the cup, leaving satiety in the
+bottom for those who venture to drink
+deep. On all sides they trip along,
+buoyed up by animal spirits, and seemingly
+so void of care, that often, when
+I am walking on the <i>Boulevards</i>, it
+occurs to me, that they alone understand<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-41" id="DPg_4-41"></a>[<a href="images/v4-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+the full import of the term leisure; and
+they trifle their time away with such
+an air of contentment, I know not how
+to wish them wiser at the expence of
+their gaiety. They play before me like
+motes in a sunbeam, enjoying the passing
+ray; whilst an English head, searching
+for more solid happiness, loses, in
+the analysis of pleasure, the volatile
+sweets of the moment. Their chief
+enjoyment, it is true, rises from vanity:
+but it is not the vanity that engenders
+vexation of spirit; on the contrary, it
+lightens the heavy burthen of life,
+which reason too often weighs, merely
+to shift from one shoulder to the
+other.</p>
+
+<p>Investigating the modification of the
+passion, as I would analyze the elements
+that give a form to dead matter, I
+shall attempt to trace to their source<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-42" id="DPg_4-42"></a>[<a href="images/v4-42.png">42</a>]</span>
+the causes which have combined to
+render this nation the most polished, in
+a physical sense, and probably the most
+superficial in the world; and I mean to
+follow the windings of the various
+streams that disembogue into a terrific
+gulf, in which all the dignity of our
+nature is absorbed. For every thing
+has conspired to make the French the
+most sensual people in the world; and
+what can render the heart so hard, or
+so effectually stifle every moral emotion,
+as the refinements of sensuality?</p>
+
+<p>The frequent repetition of the word
+French, appears invidious; let me then
+make a previous observation, which I
+beg you not to lose sight of, when I
+speak rather harshly of a land flowing
+with milk and honey. Remember that
+it is not the morals of a particular
+people that I would decry; for are we<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-43" id="DPg_4-43"></a>[<a href="images/v4-43.png">43</a>]</span>
+not all of the same stock? But I wish
+calmly to consider the stage of civilization
+in which I find the French, and,
+giving a sketch of their character, and
+unfolding the circumstances which have
+produced its identity, I shall endeavour
+to throw some light on the history of
+man, and on the present important
+subjects of discussion.</p>
+
+<p>I would I could first inform you that,
+out of the chaos of vices and follies,
+prejudices and virtues, rudely jumbled
+together, I saw the fair form of Liberty
+slowly rising, and Virtue expanding her
+wings to shelter all her children! I
+should then hear the account of the
+barbarities that have rent the bosom of
+France patiently, and bless the firm
+hand that lopt off the rotten limbs.
+But, if the aristocracy of birth is levelled
+with the ground, only to make room<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-44" id="DPg_4-44"></a>[<a href="images/v4-44.png">44</a>]</span>
+for that of riches, I am afraid that the
+morals of the people will not be much
+improved by the change, or the government
+rendered less venal. Still it
+is not just to dwell on the misery produced
+by the present struggle, without
+adverting to the standing evils of the
+old system. I am grieved&mdash;sorely grieved&mdash;when
+I think of the blood that has
+stained the cause of freedom at Paris;
+but I also hear the same live stream cry
+aloud from the highways, through
+which the retreating armies passed
+with famine and death in their rear,
+and I hide my face with awe before
+the inscrutable ways of providence,
+sweeping in such various directions the
+besom of destruction over the sons of
+men.</p>
+
+<p>Before I came to France, I cherished,
+you know, an opinion, that strong vir<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-45" id="DPg_4-45"></a>[<a href="images/v4-45.png">45</a>]</span>tues
+might exist with the polished manners
+produced by the progress of civilization;
+and I even anticipated the
+epoch, when, in the course of improvement,
+men would labour to become
+virtuous, without being goaded on by
+misery. But now, the perspective of
+the golden age, fading before the attentive
+eye of observation, almost eludes
+my sight; and, losing thus in part my
+theory of a more perfect state, start not,
+my friend, if I bring forward an opinion,
+which at the first glance seems to
+be levelled against the existence of God!
+I am not become an Atheist, I assure
+you, by residing at Paris: yet I begin
+to fear that vice, or, if you will, evil,
+is the grand mobile of action, and that,
+when the passions are justly poized, we
+become harmless, and in the same proportion
+useless.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-46" id="DPg_4-46"></a>[<a href="images/v4-46.png">46</a>]</span>
+The wants of reason are very few;
+and, were we to consider dispassionately
+the real value of most things, we should
+probably rest satisfied with the simple
+gratification of our physical necessities,
+and be content with negative goodness:
+for it is frequently, only that wanton,
+the Imagination, with her artful
+coquetry, who lures us forward, and
+makes us run over a rough road, pushing
+aside every obstacle merely to catch
+a disappointment.</p>
+
+<p>The desire also of being useful to
+others, is continually damped by experience;
+and, if the exertions of humanity
+were not in some measure their
+own reward, who would endure misery,
+or struggle with care, to make
+some people ungrateful, and others
+idle?</p>
+
+<p>You will call these melancholy effu<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-47" id="DPg_4-47"></a>[<a href="images/v4-47.png">47</a>]</span>sions,
+and guess that, fatigued by the
+vivacity, which has all the bustling
+folly of childhood, without the innocence
+which renders ignorance charming,
+I am too severe in my strictures.
+It may be so; and I am aware that the
+good effects of the revolution will be
+last felt at Paris; where surely the soul
+of Epicurus has long been at work to
+root out the simple emotions of the
+heart, which, being natural, are always
+moral. Rendered cold and artificial
+by the selfish enjoyments of the senses,
+which the government fostered, is it
+surprising that simplicity of manners,
+and singleness of heart, rarely appear,
+to recreate me with the wild odour of
+nature, so passing sweet?</p>
+
+<p>Seeing how deep the fibres of mischief
+have shot, I sometimes ask, with a
+doubting accent, Whether a nation can<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-48" id="DPg_4-48"></a>[<a href="images/v4-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+go back to the purity of manners which
+has hitherto been maintained unsullied
+only by the keen air of poverty, when,
+emasculated by pleasure, the luxuries
+of prosperity are become the wants of
+nature? I cannot yet give up the hope,
+that a fairer day is dawning on Europe,
+though I must hesitatingly observe, that
+little is to be expected from the narrow
+principle of commerce which seems
+every where to be shoving aside <i>the point
+of honour</i> of the <i>noblesse</i>. I can look beyond
+the evils of the moment, and do
+not expect muddied water to become
+clear before it has had time to stand;
+yet, even for the moment, it is the
+most terrific of all sights, to see men
+vicious without warmth&mdash;to see the
+order that should be the superscription
+of virtue, cultivated to give security to
+crimes which only thoughtlessness could<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-49" id="DPg_4-49"></a>[<a href="images/v4-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+palliate. Disorder is, in fact, the very
+essence of vice, though with the wild
+wishes of a corrupt fancy humane emotions
+often kindly mix to soften their
+atrocity. Thus humanity, generosity,
+and even self-denial, sometimes render
+a character grand, and even useful,
+when hurried away by lawless passions;
+but what can equal the turpitude of a
+cold calculator who lives for himself
+alone, and considering his fellow-creatures
+merely as machines of pleasure,
+never forgets that honesty is the best policy?
+Keeping ever within the pale of
+the law, he crushes his thousands with
+impunity; but it is with that degree of
+management, which makes him, to borrow
+a significant vulgarism, a villain
+<i>in grain</i>. The very excess of his depravation
+preserves him, whilst the more
+respectable beast of prey, who prowls<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-50" id="DPg_4-50"></a>[<a href="images/v4-50.png">50</a>]</span>
+about like the lion, and roars to announce
+his approach, falls into a snare.</p>
+
+<p>You may think it too soon to form
+an opinion of the future government,
+yet it is impossible to avoid hazarding
+some conjectures, when every thing
+whispers me, that names, not principles,
+are changed, and when I see that
+the turn of the tide has left the dregs of
+the old system to corrupt the new. For
+the same pride of office, the same desire
+of power are still visible; with this aggravation,
+that, fearing to return to obscurity
+after having but just acquired
+a relish for distinction, each hero, or
+philosopher, for all are dubbed with
+these new titles, endeavours to make
+hay while the sun shines; and every
+petty municipal officer, become the idol,
+or rather the tyrant of the day, stalks
+like a cock on a dunghil.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-51" id="DPg_4-51"></a>[<a href="images/v4-51.png">51</a>]</span>
+I shall now conclude this desultory
+letter; which however will enable you
+to foresee that I shall treat more of
+morals than manners.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-52" id="DPg_4-52"></a>[<a href="images/v4-52.png">52</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-53" id="DPg_4-53"></a>[<a href="images/v4-53.png">53</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>FRAGMENT</h2>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h3>ON THE</h3>
+<h2>MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.</h2>
+
+<hr />
+<h3><a name="DV4_CONTENTS_L" id="DV4_CONTENTS_L"></a>CONTENTS.</h3>
+
+<ul class="plain"><li>Introductory Letter.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter II.</span> Management of the Mother during pregnancy: bathing.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter III.</span> Lying-in.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter IV.</span> The first month: diet: clothing.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter V.</span> The three following months.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter VI.</span> The remainder of the first year.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter VII.</span> The second year, &amp;c: conclusion.</li></ul>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-54" id="DPg_4-54"></a>[<a href="images/v4-54.png">54</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-55" id="DPg_4-55"></a>[<a href="images/v4-55.png">55</a>]</span></p>
+
+
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h3>ON THE</h3>
+<h2>MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.</h2>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER I</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I ought</span> to apologize for not having
+written to you on the subject you
+mentioned; but, to tell you the truth,
+it grew upon me: and, instead of an
+answer, I have begun a series of letters
+on the management of children in
+their infancy. Replying then to your
+question, I have the public in my<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-56" id="DPg_4-56"></a>[<a href="images/v4-56.png">56</a>]</span>
+thoughts, and shall endeavour to show
+what modes appear to me necessary,
+to render the infancy of children more
+healthy and happy. I have long
+thought, that the cause which renders
+children as hard to rear as the most
+fragile plant, is our deviation from
+simplicity. I know that some able
+physicians have recommended the method
+I have pursued, and I mean to
+point out the good effects I have observed
+in practice. I am aware that
+many matrons will exclaim against me,
+and dwell on the number of children
+they have brought up, as their mothers
+did before them, without troubling
+themselves with new-fangled notions;
+yet, though, in my uncle Toby's words,
+they should attempt to silence me, by
+"wishing I had seen their large" families,
+I must suppose, while a third part<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-57" id="DPg_4-57"></a>[<a href="images/v4-57.png">57</a>]</span>
+of the human species, according to the
+most accurate calculation, die during
+their infancy, just at the threshold of
+life, that there is some error in the
+modes adopted by mothers and nurses,
+which counteracts their own endeavours.
+I may be mistaken in some
+particulars; for general rules, founded
+on the soundest reason, demand individual
+modification; but, if I can persuade
+any of the rising generation to
+exercise their reason on this head, I am
+content. My advice will probably
+be found most useful to mothers in the
+middle class; and it is from them that
+the lower imperceptibly gains improvement.
+Custom, produced by reason
+in one, may safely be the effect of
+imitation in the other.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-58" id="DPg_4-58"></a>[<a href="images/v4-58.png">58</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-59" id="DPg_4-59"></a>[<a href="images/v4-59.png">59</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h4>TO</h4>
+<h2>Mr. JOHNSON,</h2>
+<h3><i>BOOKSELLER</i>,</h3>
+<h4>IN</h4>
+<h3><span class="smcap">St. PAUL's CHURCH-YARD</span>.</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-60" id="DPg_4-60"></a>[<a href="images/v4-60.png">60</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-61" id="DPg_4-61"></a>[<a href="images/v4-61.png">61</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h4>TO</h4>
+<h2>Mr. JOHNSON.</h2>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+
+<h4>LETTER I</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Dublin, April 14, [1787.]</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; Dear sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> still an invalid&mdash;and begin to
+believe that I ought never to expect to
+enjoy health. My mind preys on my
+body&mdash;and, when I endeavour to be
+useful, I grow too much interested for
+my own peace. Confined almost entirely
+to the society of children, I am
+anxiously solicitous for their future
+welfare, and mortified beyond measure,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-62" id="DPg_4-62"></a>[<a href="images/v4-62.png">62</a>]</span>
+when counteracted in my endeavours to
+improve them.&mdash;I feel all a mother's
+fears for the swarm of little ones which
+surround me, and observe disorders,
+without having power to apply the
+proper remedies. How can I be reconciled
+to life, when it is always a
+painful warfare, and when I am deprived
+of all the pleasures I relish?&mdash;I
+allude to rational conversations, and
+domestic affections. Here, alone, a
+poor solitary individual in a strange
+land, tied to one spot, and subject to
+the caprice of another, can I be contented?
+I am desirous to convince you
+that I have <i>some</i> cause for sorrow&mdash;and
+am not without reason detached from
+life. I shall hope to hear that you are
+well, and am yours sincerely</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">Mary Wollstonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-63" id="DPg_4-63"></a>[<a href="images/v4-63.png">63</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER II</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Henley, Thursday, Sept 13.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Since</span> I saw you, I have, literally
+speaking, <i>enjoyed</i> solitude. My sister
+could not accompany me in my rambles;
+I therefore wandered alone, by
+the side of the Thames, and in the
+neighbouring beautiful fields and
+pleasure grounds: the prospects were
+of such a placid kind, I <i>caught</i> tranquillity
+while I surveyed them&mdash;my mind
+was <i>still</i>, though active. Were I to
+give you an account how I have spent
+my time, you would smile.&mdash;I found an
+old French bible here, and amused
+myself with comparing it with our<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-64" id="DPg_4-64"></a>[<a href="images/v4-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+English translation; then I would listen
+to the falling leaves, or observe the
+various tints the autumn gave to
+them&mdash;At other times, the singing of
+a robin, or the noise of a water-mill,
+engaged my attention&mdash;partial attention&mdash;,
+for I was, at the same time
+perhaps discussing some knotty point,
+or straying from this <i>tiny</i> world to new
+systems. After these excursions, I returned
+to the family meals, told the
+children stories (they think me <i>vastly</i>
+agreeable), and my sister was amused.&mdash;Well,
+will you allow me to call this
+way of passing my days pleasant?</p>
+
+<p>I was just going to mend my pen;
+but I believe it will enable me to say
+all I have to add to this epistle. Have
+you yet heard of an habitation for me?
+I often think of my new plan of life;
+and, lest my sister should try to prevail<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-65" id="DPg_4-65"></a>[<a href="images/v4-65.png">65</a>]</span>
+on me to alter it, I have avoided mentioning
+it to her. I am determined!&mdash;Your
+sex generally laugh at female
+determinations; but let me tell you,
+I never yet resolved to do, any thing of
+consequence, that I did not adhere resolutely
+to it, till I had accomplished
+my purpose, improbable as it might
+have appeared to a more timid mind.
+In the course of near nine-and-twenty
+years, I have gathered some experience,
+and felt many <i>severe</i> disappointments&mdash;and
+what is the amount? I long for a
+little peace and <i>independence</i>! Every
+obligation we receive from our fellow-creatures
+is a new shackle, takes from
+our native freedom, and debases the
+mind, makes us mere earthworms&mdash;I
+am not fond of grovelling!</p>
+
+<p class="right">I am, sir, yours, &amp;c.&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary wollstonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-66" id="DPg_4-66"></a>[<a href="images/v4-66.png">66</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER III</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Market Harborough, Sept. 20.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> left me with three opulent
+tradesmen; their conversation was not
+calculated to beguile the way, when
+the sable curtain concealed the beauties
+of nature. I listened to the tricks
+of trade&mdash;and shrunk away, without
+wishing to grow rich; even the novelty
+of the subjects did not render them
+pleasing; fond as I am of tracing the
+passions in all their different forms&mdash;I
+was not surprised by any glimpse of the
+sublime, or beautiful&mdash;though one of
+them imagined I would be a useful partner
+in a good <i>firm</i>. I was very much
+fatigued, and have scarcely recovered<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-67" id="DPg_4-67"></a>[<a href="images/v4-67.png">67</a>]</span>
+myself. I do not expect to enjoy the
+same tranquil pleasures Henley afforded:
+I meet with new objects to employ
+my mind; but many painful emotions
+are complicated with the reflections
+they give rise to.</p>
+
+<p>I do not intend to enter on the <i>old</i>
+topic, yet hope to hear from you&mdash;and
+am yours, &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary wollstonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER IV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Night.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Though</span> your remarks are generally
+judicious&mdash;I cannot <i>now</i> concur with you,
+I mean with respect to the preface<a name="FNanchor_67-A_21" id="DFNanchor_67-A_21"></a><a href="#DFootnote_67-A_21" class="fnanchor">[67-A]</a>,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-68" id="DPg_4-68"></a>[<a href="images/v4-68.png">68</a>]</span>
+and have not altered it. I hate the
+usual smooth way of exhibiting proud
+humility. A general rule <i>only</i> extends
+to the majority&mdash;and, believe me, the
+few judicious parents who may peruse
+my book, will not feel themselves hurt&mdash;and
+the weak are too vain to mind what
+is said in a book intended for children.</p>
+
+<p>I return you the Italian MS.&mdash;but
+do not hastily imagine that I am indolent.
+I would not spare any labour to
+do my duty&mdash;and, after the most laborious
+day, that single thought would
+solace me more than any pleasures the
+senses could enjoy. I find I could not
+translate the MS. well. If it was not
+a MS, I should not be so easily intimidated;
+but the hand, and errors in
+orthography, or abbreviations, are a
+stumbling-block at the first setting
+out.&mdash;I cannot bear to do any thing I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-69" id="DPg_4-69"></a>[<a href="images/v4-69.png">69</a>]</span>
+cannot do well&mdash;and I should lose time
+in the vain attempt.</p>
+
+<p>I had, the other day, the satisfaction
+of again receiving a letter from my
+poor, dear Margaret<a name="FNanchor_69-A_22" id="DFNanchor_69-A_22"></a><a href="#DFootnote_69-A_22" class="fnanchor">[69-A]</a>.&mdash;With all a
+mother's fondness I could transcribe a
+part of it&mdash;She says, every day her
+affection to me, and dependence on
+heaven increase, &amp;c.&mdash;I miss her
+innocent caresses&mdash;and sometimes indulge
+a pleasing hope, that she may be
+allowed to cheer my childless age&mdash;if
+I am to live to be old.&mdash;At any rate, I
+may hear of the virtues I may not contemplate&mdash;and
+my reason may permit
+me to love a female.&mdash;I now allude to
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. I have received another letter
+from her, and her childish complaints
+vex me&mdash;indeed they do&mdash;As
+usual, good-night.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-70" id="DPg_4-70"></a>[<a href="images/v4-70.png">70</a>]</span></p>
+<p>If parents attended to their children,
+I would not have written the stories;
+for, what are books&mdash;compared to conversations
+which affection inforces!&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER V</h4>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Remember</span> you are to settle <i>my account</i>,
+as I want to know how much I
+am in your debt&mdash;but do not suppose
+that I feel any uneasiness on that score.
+The generality of people in trade
+would not be much obliged to me for a
+like civility, <i>but you were a man</i> before
+you were a bookseller&mdash;so I am your
+sincere friend,</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-71" id="DPg_4-71"></a>[<a href="images/v4-71.png">71</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> sick with vexation&mdash;and wish
+I could knock my foolish head against
+the wall, that bodily pain might make
+me feel less anguish from self-reproach!
+To say the truth, I was never more displeased
+with myself, and I will tell you
+the cause.&mdash;You may recollect that I
+did not mention to you the circumstance
+of &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; having a fortune left
+to him; nor did a hint of it drop from
+me when I conversed with my sister;
+because I knew he had a sufficient motive
+for concealing it. Last Sunday,
+when his character was aspersed, as I
+thought, unjustly, in the heat of vindi<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-72" id="DPg_4-72"></a>[<a href="images/v4-72.png">72</a>]</span>cation
+I informed ****** that he was
+now independent; but, at the same
+time, desired him not to repeat my information
+to B&mdash;&mdash;; yet, last Tuesday,
+he told him all&mdash;and the boy at B&mdash;&mdash;'s
+gave Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; an account of it. As
+Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; knew he had only made a
+confident of me (I blush to think of it!)
+he guessed the channel of intelligence,
+and this morning came (not to reproach
+me, I wish he had!) but to point out the
+injury I have done him.&mdash;Let what will
+be the consequence, I will reimburse
+him, if I deny myself the necessaries of
+life&mdash;and even then my folly will sting
+me.&mdash;Perhaps you can scarcely conceive
+the misery I at this moment
+endure&mdash;that I, whose power of doing
+good is so limited, should do harm, galls
+my very soul. ****** may laugh at
+these qualms&mdash;but, supposing Mr.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-73" id="DPg_4-73"></a>[<a href="images/v4-73.png">73</a>]</span>
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; to be unworthy, I am not
+the less to blame. Surely it is hell to
+despise one's self!&mdash;I did not want this
+additional vexation&mdash;at this time I have
+many that hang heavily on my spirits.
+I shall not call on you this month&mdash;nor
+stir out.&mdash;My stomach has been so suddenly
+and violently affected, I am
+unable to lean over the desk.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary wollstonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER VII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> I am become a reviewer, I think
+it right, in the way of business, to consider
+the subject. You have alarmed
+the editor of the Critical, as the advertisement
+prefixed to the Appendix<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-74" id="DPg_4-74"></a>[<a href="images/v4-74.png">74</a>]</span>
+plainly shows. The Critical appears
+to me to be a timid, mean production,
+and its success is a reflection on the
+taste and judgment of the public; but,
+as a body, who ever gave it credit for
+much? The voice of the people is only
+the voice of truth, when some man of
+abilities has had time to get fast hold of
+the <span class="smcap">great nose</span> of the monster. Of
+course, local fame is generally a
+clamour, and dies away. The Appendix
+to the Monthly afforded me more
+amusement, though every article almost
+wants energy and a <i>cant</i> of virtue and
+liberality is strewed over it; always
+tame, and eager to pay court to established
+fame. The account of Necker
+is one unvaried tone of admiration.
+Surely men were born only to provide
+for the sustenance of the body by enfeebling
+the mind!</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-75" id="DPg_4-75"></a>[<a href="images/v4-75.png">75</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VIII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> made me very low-spirited last
+night, by your manner of talking.&mdash;You
+are my only friend&mdash;the only
+person I am <i>intimate</i> with.&mdash;I never had
+a father, or a brother&mdash;you have been
+both to me, ever since I knew you&mdash;yet
+I have sometimes been very petulant.&mdash;I
+have been thinking of those instances
+of ill-humour and quickness, and they
+appeared like crimes.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours sincerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-76" id="DPg_4-76"></a>[<a href="images/v4-76.png">76</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER IX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> a mere animal, and instinctive
+emotions too often silence the suggestions
+of reason. Your note&mdash;I can
+scarcely tell why, hurt me&mdash;and produced
+a kind of winterly smile, which
+diffuses a beam of despondent tranquillity
+over the features. I have been
+very ill&mdash;Heaven knows it was more
+than fancy&mdash;After some sleepless, wearisome
+nights, towards the morning I
+have grown delirious.&mdash;Last Thursday,
+in particular, I imagined &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; was
+thrown into great distress by his folly;
+and I, unable to assist him, was in an
+agony. My nerves were in such a<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-77" id="DPg_4-77"></a>[<a href="images/v4-77.png">77</a>]</span>
+painful state of irritation&mdash;I suffered
+more than I can express&mdash;Society was
+necessary&mdash;and might have diverted
+me till I gained more strength; but I
+blushed when I recollected how often
+I had teazed you with childish complaints,
+and the reveries of a disordered
+imagination. I even <i>imagined</i> that I
+intruded on you, because you never
+called on me&mdash;though you perceived
+that I was not well.&mdash;I have nourished
+a sickly kind of delicacy, which gives
+me many unnecessary pangs.&mdash;I acknowledge
+that life is but a jest&mdash;and
+often a frightful dream&mdash;yet catch
+myself every day searching for something
+serious&mdash;and feel real misery
+from the disappointment. I am a
+strange compound of weakness and resolution!
+However, if I must suffer, I
+will endeavour to suffer in silence.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-78" id="DPg_4-78"></a>[<a href="images/v4-78.png">78</a>]</span>
+There is certainly a great defect in my
+mind&mdash;my wayward heart creates its
+own misery&mdash;Why I am made thus I
+cannot tell; and, till I can form some
+idea of the whole of my existence, I
+must be content to weep and dance
+like a child&mdash;long for a toy, and be
+tired of it as soon as I get it.</p>
+
+<p>We must each of us wear a fool's
+cap; but mine, alas! has lost its bells,
+and is grown so heavy, I find it intolerably
+troublesome.&mdash;&mdash;Good-night!
+I have been pursuing a number of
+strange thoughts since I began to write,
+and have actually both wept and
+laughed immoderately&mdash;Surely I am a
+fool&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary w.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-79" id="DPg_4-79"></a>[<a href="images/v4-79.png">79</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER X</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I really</span> want a German grammar,
+as I intend to attempt to learn that
+language&mdash;and I will tell you the reason
+why.&mdash;While I live, I am persuaded,
+I must exert my understanding to procure
+an independence, and render
+myself useful. To make the task easier,
+I ought to store my mind with knowledge&mdash;The
+seed time is passing away.
+I see the necessity of labouring now&mdash;and
+of that necessity I do not complain;
+on the contrary, I am thankful that I
+have more than common incentives to
+pursue knowledge, and draw my plea<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-80" id="DPg_4-80"></a>[<a href="images/v4-80.png">80</a>]</span>sures
+from the employments that are
+within my reach. You perceive this is
+not a gloomy day&mdash;I feel at this moment
+particularly grateful to you&mdash;without
+your humane and <i>delicate</i>
+assistance, how many obstacles should I
+not have had to encounter&mdash;too often
+should I have been out of patience
+with my fellow-creatures, whom I
+wish to love!&mdash;Allow me to love you,
+my dear sir, and call friend a being I
+respect.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary w.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-81" id="DPg_4-81"></a>[<a href="images/v4-81.png">81</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XI</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I thought</span> you <i>very</i> unkind, nay,
+very unfeeling, last night. My cares
+and vexations&mdash;I will say what I allow
+myself to think&mdash;do me honour, as they
+arise from my disinterestedness and <i>unbending</i>
+principles; nor can that mode
+of conduct be a reflection on my understanding,
+which enables me to bear
+misery, rather than selfishly live for myself
+alone. I am not the only character
+deserving of respect, that has had to
+struggle with various sorrows&mdash;while
+inferior minds have enjoyed local fame
+and present comfort.&mdash;Dr. Johnson's
+cares almost drove him mad&mdash;but, I
+suppose, you would quietly have told
+him, he was a fool for not being calm,
+and that wise men striving against the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-82" id="DPg_4-82"></a>[<a href="images/v4-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+stream, can yet be in good humour. I
+have done with insensible human wisdom,&mdash;"indifference
+cold in wisdom's
+guise,"&mdash;and turn to the source of perfection&mdash;who
+perhaps never disregarded
+an almost broken heart, especially when
+a respect, a practical respect, for virtue,
+sharpened the wounds of adversity. I
+am ill&mdash;I stayed in bed this morning
+till eleven o'clock, only thinking of
+getting money to extricate myself out
+of some of my difficulties&mdash;The struggle
+is now over. I will condescend to try
+to obtain some in a disagreeable way.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; called on me just now&mdash;pray
+did you know his motive for calling<a name="FNanchor_82-A_23" id="DFNanchor_82-A_23"></a><a href="#DFootnote_82-A_23" class="fnanchor">[82-A]</a>?&mdash;I
+think him impertinently offi<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-83" id="DPg_4-83"></a>[<a href="images/v4-83.png">83</a>]</span>cious.&mdash;He
+had left the house before it
+occurred to me in the strong light it does
+now, or I should have told him so&mdash;My
+poverty makes me proud&mdash;I will not be
+insulted by a superficial puppy.&mdash;His
+intimacy with Miss &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; gave him a
+privilege, which he should not have assumed
+with me&mdash;a proposal might be
+made to his cousin, a milliner's girl,
+which should not have been mentioned
+to me. Pray tell him that I am offended&mdash;and
+do not wish to see him again!&mdash;When
+I meet him at your house, I shall
+leave the room, since I cannot pull him
+by the nose. I can force my spirit to
+leave my body&mdash;but it shall never bend
+to support that body&mdash;God of heaven,
+save thy child from this living death!&mdash;I
+scarcely know what I write. My
+hand trembles&mdash;I am very sick&mdash;sick at
+heart.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-84" id="DPg_4-84"></a>[<a href="images/v4-84.png">84</a>]</span></p>
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tuesday Evening.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; Sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> you left me this morning, and
+I reflected a moment&mdash;your <i>officious</i>
+message, which at first appeared to me
+a joke&mdash;looked so very like an insult&mdash;I
+cannot forget it&mdash;To prevent then the
+necessity of forcing a smile&mdash;when I
+chance to meet you&mdash;I take the earliest
+opportunity of informing you of my
+real sentiments.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary wollstonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-85" id="DPg_4-85"></a>[<a href="images/v4-85.png">85</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wednesday, 3 o'clock.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; Sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is inexpressibly disagreeable to me
+to be obliged to enter again on a subject,
+that has already raised a tumult of
+<i>indignant</i> emotions in my bosom, which
+I was labouring to suppress when I received
+your letter. I shall now <i>condescend</i>
+to answer your epistle; but let me
+first tell you, that, in my <i>unprotected</i> situation,
+I make a point of never forgiving
+a <i>deliberate insult</i>&mdash;and in that light I
+consider your late officious conduct.
+It is not according to my nature to
+mince matters&mdash;I will then tell you in<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-86" id="DPg_4-86"></a>[<a href="images/v4-86.png">86</a>]</span>
+plain terms, what I think. I have ever
+considered you in the light of a <i>civil</i>
+acquaintance&mdash;on the word friend I lay
+a peculiar emphasis&mdash;and, as a mere
+acquaintance, you were rude and <i>cruel</i>,
+to step forward to insult a woman,
+whose conduct and misfortunes demand
+respect. If my friend, Mr. Johnson,
+had made the proposal&mdash;I should have
+been severely hurt&mdash;have thought him
+unkind and unfeeling, but not <i>impertinent</i>.&mdash;The
+privilege of intimacy you
+had no claim to&mdash;and should have referred
+the man to myself&mdash;if you had
+not sufficient discernment to quash it at
+once. I am, sir, poor and destitute.&mdash;Yet
+I have a spirit that will never bend,
+or take indirect methods, to obtain the
+consequence I despise; nay, if to support
+life it was necessary to act contrary
+to my principles, the struggle<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-87" id="DPg_4-87"></a>[<a href="images/v4-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+would soon be over. I can bear any
+thing but my own contempt.</p>
+
+<p>In a few words, what I call an insult,
+is the bare supposition that I could for
+a moment think of <i>prostituting</i> my person
+for a maintenance; for in that point of
+view does such a marriage appear to
+me, who consider right and wrong in
+the abstract, and never by words and
+local opinions shield myself from the
+reproaches of my own heart and understanding.</p>
+
+<p>It is needless to say more&mdash;Only you
+must excuse me when I add, that I wish
+never to see, but as a perfect stranger,
+a person who could so grossly mistake
+my character. An apology is not necessary&mdash;if
+you were inclined to make
+one&mdash;nor any further expostulations.&mdash;I
+again repeat, I cannot overlook an
+affront; few indeed have sufficient de<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-88" id="DPg_4-88"></a>[<a href="images/v4-88.png">88</a>]</span>licacy
+to respect poverty, even where
+it gives lustre to a character&mdash;and I tell
+you sir, I am <span class="smcap">poor</span>&mdash;yet can live without
+your benevolent exertions.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary wollstonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XIV</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I send</span> you <i>all</i> the books I had to review
+except Dr. J&mdash;'s Sermons, which
+I have begun. If you wish me to look
+over any more trash this month&mdash;you
+must send it directly. I have been so
+low-spirited since I saw you&mdash;I was
+quite glad, last night, to feel myself affected
+by some passages in Dr. J&mdash;'s
+sermon on the death of his wife&mdash;I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-89" id="DPg_4-89"></a>[<a href="images/v4-89.png">89</a>]</span>
+seemed (suddenly) to <i>find</i> my <i>soul</i> again&mdash;It
+has been for some time I cannot
+tell where. Send me the Speaker&mdash;and
+<i>Mary</i>, I want one&mdash;and I shall soon
+want some paper&mdash;you may as well
+send it at the same time&mdash;for I am trying
+to brace my nerves that I may be
+industrious.&mdash;I am afraid reason is not a
+good bracer&mdash;for I have been reasoning
+a long time with my untoward spirits&mdash;and
+yet my hand trembles.&mdash;I could
+finish a period very <i>prettily</i> now, by saying
+that it ought to be steady when I
+add that I am yours sincerely,</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<p>If you do not like the manner in
+which I reviewed Dr. J&mdash;'s s&mdash;&mdash; on
+his wife, be it known unto you&mdash;I <i>will</i>
+not do it any other way&mdash;I felt some
+pleasure in paying a just tribute of re<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-90" id="DPg_4-90"></a>[<a href="images/v4-90.png">90</a>]</span>spect
+to the memory of a man&mdash;who,
+spite of his faults, I have an affection
+for&mdash;I say <i>have</i>, for I believe he is
+somewhere&mdash;<i>where</i> my soul has been
+gadding perhaps;&mdash;but <i>you</i> do not live
+on conjectures.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XV</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> dear sir, I send you a chapter
+which I am pleased with, now I see it
+in one point of view&mdash;and, as I have
+made free with the author, I hope you
+will not have often to say&mdash;what does
+this mean?</p>
+
+<p>You forgot you were to make out<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-91" id="DPg_4-91"></a>[<a href="images/v4-91.png">91</a>]</span>
+my account&mdash;I am, of course, over
+head and ears in debt; but I have not
+that kind of pride, which makes some
+dislike to be obliged to those they respect.&mdash;On
+the contrary, when I involuntarily
+lament that I have not a father
+or brother, I thankfully recollect that
+I have received unexpected kindness
+from you and a few others.&mdash;So reason
+allows, what nature impels me to&mdash;for
+I cannot live without loving my fellow-creatures&mdash;nor
+can I love them, without
+discovering some virtue.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-92" id="DPg_4-92"></a>[<a href="images/v4-92.png">92</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Paris, December 26, 1792.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I should</span> immediately on the receipt
+of your letter, my dear friend, have
+thanked you for your punctuality, for it
+highly gratified me, had I not wished
+to wait till I could tell you that this
+day was not stained with blood. Indeed
+the prudent precautions taken by
+the National Convention to prevent a
+tumult, made me suppose that the dogs
+of faction would not dare to bark, much
+less to bite, however true to their scent;
+and I was not mistaken; for the citizens,
+who were all called out, are returning
+home with composed counte<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-93" id="DPg_4-93"></a>[<a href="images/v4-93.png">93</a>]</span>nances,
+shouldering their arms. About
+nine o'clock this morning, the king
+passed by my window, moving silently
+along (excepting now and then a few
+strokes on the drum, which rendered
+the stillness more awful) through empty
+streets, surrounded by the national guards,
+who, clustering round the carriage,
+seemed to deserve their name. The
+inhabitants flocked to their windows,
+but the casements were all shut, not a
+voice was heard, nor did I see any
+thing like an insulting gesture.&mdash;For
+the first time since I entered France,
+I bowed to the majesty of the people,
+and respected the propriety of behaviour
+so perfectly in unison with my own
+feelings. I can scarcely tell you why,
+but an association of ideas made the
+tears flow insensibly from my eyes,
+when I saw Louis sitting, with more<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-94" id="DPg_4-94"></a>[<a href="images/v4-94.png">94</a>]</span>
+dignity than I expected from his character,
+in a hackney coach, going to
+meet death, where so many of his race
+have triumphed. My fancy instantly
+brought Louis XIV before me, entering
+the capital with all his pomp, after
+one of the victories most flattering to
+his pride, only to see the sunshine of
+prosperity overshadowed by the sublime
+gloom of misery. I have been alone
+ever since; and, though my mind is
+calm, I cannot dismiss the lively images
+that have filled my imagination all the
+day.&mdash;Nay, do not smile, but pity me;
+for, once or twice, lifting my eyes from
+the paper, I have seen eyes glare
+through a glass-door opposite my chair
+and bloody hands shook at me. Not
+the distant sound of a footstep can I
+hear.&mdash;My apartments are remote from
+those of the servants, the only persons<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-95" id="DPg_4-95"></a>[<a href="images/v4-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+who sleep with me in an immense hotel,
+one folding door opening after another.&mdash;I
+wish I had even kept the cat with
+me!&mdash;I want to see something alive;
+death in so many frightful shapes has
+taken hold of my fancy.&mdash;I am going to
+bed&mdash;and, for the first time in my life, I
+cannot put out the candle.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">m. w.</span></p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_67-A_21" id="DFootnote_67-A_21"></a><a href="#DFNanchor_67-A_21"><span class="label">[67-A]</span></a> To Original Stories.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_69-A_22" id="DFootnote_69-A_22"></a><a href="#DFNanchor_69-A_22"><span class="label">[69-A]</span></a> Countess Mount Cashel.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_82-A_23" id="DFootnote_82-A_23"></a><a href="#DFNanchor_82-A_23"><span class="label">[82-A]</span></a> This alludes to a foolish proposal of marriage
+for mercenary considerations, which the gentleman
+here mentioned thought proper to recommend to
+her. The two letters which immediately follow,
+are addressed to the gentleman himself.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-96" id="DPg_4-96"></a>[<a href="images/v4-96.png">96</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-97" id="DPg_4-97"></a>[<a href="images/v4-97.png">97</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="EXTRACT" id="DEXTRACT"></a>EXTRACT</h2>
+
+<h4>OF THE</h4>
+
+<h2>CAVE OF FANCY.</h2>
+
+<h3>A TALE.</h3>
+
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p class="center">[<i>Begun to be written in the year 1787, but never completed</i>]</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-98" id="DPg_4-98"></a>[<a href="images/v4-98.png">98</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-99" id="DPg_4-99"></a>[<a href="images/v4-99.png">99</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>CAVE OF FANCY.</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr class="short" />
+<h2><a name="DV4_CHAP_I" id="DV4_CHAP_I"></a>CHAP. I.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Ye</span> who expect constancy where every
+thing is changing, and peace in the
+midst of tumult, attend to the voice of
+experience, and mark in time the footsteps
+of disappointment, or life will be
+lost in desultory wishes, and death arrive
+before the dawn of wisdom.</p>
+
+<p>In a sequestered valley, surrounded by
+rocky mountains that intercepted many
+of the passing clouds, though sunbeams
+variegated their ample sides, lived a
+sage, to whom nature had unlocked<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-100" id="DPg_4-100"></a>[<a href="images/v4-100.png">100</a>]</span>
+her most hidden secrets. His hollow
+eyes, sunk in their orbits, retired from
+the view of vulgar objects, and turned
+inwards, overleaped the boundary prescribed
+to human knowledge. Intense
+thinking during fourscore and ten years,
+had whitened the scattered locks on
+his head, which, like the summit of
+the distant mountain, appeared to be
+bound by an eternal frost.</p>
+
+<p>On the sandy waste behind the mountains,
+the track of ferocious beasts
+might be traced, and sometimes the
+mangled limbs which they left, attracted
+a hovering flight of birds of prey. An
+extensive wood the sage had forced to
+rear its head in a soil by no means congenial,
+and the firm trunks of the trees
+seemed to frown with defiance on time;
+though the spoils of innumerable summers
+covered the roots, which resembled<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-101" id="DPg_4-101"></a>[<a href="images/v4-101.png">101</a>]</span>
+fangs; so closely did they cling to the
+unfriendly sand, where serpents hissed,
+and snakes, rolling out their vast folds,
+inhaled the noxious vapours. The ravens
+and owls who inhabited the solitude,
+gave also a thicker gloom to the
+everlasting twilight, and the croaking
+of the former a monotony, in unison
+with the gloom; whilst lions and tygers,
+shunning even this faint semblance of
+day, sought the dark caverns, and at
+night, when they shook off sleep, their
+roaring would make the whole valley
+resound, confounded with the screechings
+of the bird of night.</p>
+
+<p>One mountain rose sublime, towering
+above all, on the craggy sides of which
+a few sea-weeds grew, washed by the
+ocean, that with tumultuous roar rushed
+to assault, and even undermine, the
+huge barrier that stopped its progress;<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-102" id="DPg_4-102"></a>[<a href="images/v4-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+and ever and anon a ponderous mass,
+loosened from the cliff, to which it
+scarcely seemed to adhere, always threatening
+to fall, fell into the flood, rebounding
+as it fell, and the sound was re-echoed
+from rock to rock. Look where
+you would, all was without form, as
+if nature, suddenly stopping her hand,
+had left chaos a retreat.</p>
+
+<p>Close to the most remote side of it
+was the sage's abode. It was a rude
+hut, formed of stumps of trees and
+matted twigs, to secure him from the
+inclemency of the weather; only through
+small apertures crossed with rushes, the
+wind entered in wild murmurs, modulated
+by these obstructions. A clear
+spring broke out of the middle of the
+adjacent rock, which, dropping slowly
+into a cavity it had hollowed, soon
+overflowed, and then ran, struggling to<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-103" id="DPg_4-103"></a>[<a href="images/v4-103.png">103</a>]</span>
+free itself from the cumbrous fragments,
+till, become a deep, silent stream, it
+escaped through reeds, and roots of
+trees, whose blasted tops overhung and
+darkened the current.</p>
+
+<p>One side of the hut was supported by
+the rock, and at midnight, when the
+sage struck the inclosed part, it yawned
+wide, and admitted him into a cavern in
+the very bowels of the earth, where
+never human foot before had trod; and
+the various spirits, which inhabit the
+different regions of nature, were here
+obedient to his potent word. The cavern
+had been formed by the great
+inundation of waters, when the approach
+of a comet forced them from
+their source; then, when the fountains
+of the great deep were broken up,
+a stream rushed out of the centre of the
+earth, where the spirits, who have lived<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-104" id="DPg_4-104"></a>[<a href="images/v4-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+on it, are confined to purify themselves
+from the dross contracted in their first
+stage of existence; and it flowed in
+black waves, for ever bubbling along
+the cave, the extent of which had never
+been explored. From the sides and
+top, water distilled, and, petrifying as
+it fell, took fantastic shapes, that soon
+divided it into apartments, if so they
+might be called. In the foam, a wearied
+spirit would sometimes rise, to catch
+the most distant glimpse of light, or
+taste the vagrant breeze, which the
+yawning of the rock admitted, when
+Sagestus, for that was the name of the
+hoary sage, entered. Some, who were
+refined and almost cleared from vicious
+spots, he would allow to leave, for a limited
+time, their dark prison-house;
+and, flying on the winds across the bleak
+northern ocean, or rising in an exhala<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-105" id="DPg_4-105"></a>[<a href="images/v4-105.png">105</a>]</span>tion
+till they reached a sun-beam, they
+thus re-visited the haunts of men. These
+were the guardian angels, who in soft
+whispers restrain the vicious, and animate
+the wavering wretch who stands
+suspended between virtue and vice.</p>
+
+<p>Sagestus had spent a night in the cavern,
+as he often did, and he left the
+silent vestibule of the grave, just as the
+sun, emerging from the ocean, dispersed
+the clouds, which were not half
+so dense as those he had left. All that
+was human in him rejoiced at the sight
+of reviving life, and he viewed with
+pleasure the mounting sap rising to expand
+the herbs, which grew spontaneously
+in this wild&mdash;when, turning his
+eyes towards the sea, he found that
+death had been at work during his absence,
+and terrific marks of a furious
+storm still spread horror around. Though<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-106" id="DPg_4-106"></a>[<a href="images/v4-106.png">106</a>]</span>
+the day was serene, and threw bright
+rays on eyes for ever shut, it dawned
+not for the wretches who hung pendent
+on the craggy rocks, or were stretched
+lifeless on the sand. Some, struggling,
+had dug themselves a grave; others
+had resigned their breath before the
+impetuous surge whirled them on shore.
+A few, in whom the vital spark was
+not so soon dislodged, had clung to
+loose fragments; it was the grasp of
+death; embracing the stone, they stiffened;
+and the head, no longer erect,
+rested on the mass which the arms encircled.
+It felt not the agonizing gripe,
+nor heard the sigh that broke the heart
+in twain.</p>
+
+<p>Resting his chin on an oaken club,
+the sage looked on every side, to see
+if he could discern any who yet breathed.
+He drew nearer, and thought he<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-107" id="DPg_4-107"></a>[<a href="images/v4-107.png">107</a>]</span>
+saw, at the first glance, the unclosed eyes
+glare; but soon perceived that they
+were a mere glassy substance, mute as
+the tongue; the jaws were fallen, and,
+in some of the tangled locks, hands
+were clinched; nay, even the nails
+had entered sharpened by despair. The
+blood flew rapidly to his heart; it was
+flesh; he felt he was still a man, and
+the big tear paced down his iron cheeks,
+whose muscles had not for a long time
+been relaxed by such humane emotions.
+A moment he breathed quick, then
+heaved a sigh, and his wonted calm
+returned with an unaccustomed glow
+of tenderness; for the ways of heaven
+were not hid from him; he lifted up
+his eyes to the common Father of nature,
+and all was as still in his bosom, as
+the smooth deep, after having closed<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-108" id="DPg_4-108"></a>[<a href="images/v4-108.png">108</a>]</span>
+over the huge vessel from which the
+wretches had fled.</p>
+
+<p>Turning round a part of the rock
+that jutted out, meditating on the ways
+of Providence, a weak infantine voice
+reached his ears; it was lisping out the
+name of mother. He looked, and beheld
+a blooming child leaning over, and
+kissing with eager fondness, lips that
+were insensible to the warm pressure.
+Starting at the sight of the sage, she
+fixed her eyes on him, "Wake her,
+ah! wake her," she cried, "or the
+sea will catch us." Again he felt compassion,
+for he saw that the mother
+slept the sleep of death. He stretched
+out his hand, and, smoothing his brow,
+invited her to approach; but she still
+intreated him to wake her mother,
+whom she continued to call, with an
+impatient tremulous voice. To detach<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-109" id="DPg_4-109"></a>[<a href="images/v4-109.png">109</a>]</span>
+her from the body by persuasion would
+not have been very easy. Sagestus had
+a quicker method to effect his purpose;
+he took out a box which contained a
+soporific powder, and as soon as the
+fumes reached her brain, the powers of
+life were suspended.</p>
+
+<p>He carried her directly to his hut,
+and left her sleeping profoundly on his
+rushy couch.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-110" id="DPg_4-110"></a>[<a href="images/v4-110.png">110</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="DV4_CHAP_II" id="DV4_CHAP_II"></a>CHAP. II.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Again</span> Sagestus approached the
+dead, to view them with a more scrutinizing
+eye. He was perfectly acquainted
+with the construction of the
+human body, knew the traces that virtue
+or vice leaves on the whole frame;
+they were now indelibly fixed by death;
+nay more, he knew by the shape of
+the solid structure, how far the spirit
+could range, and saw the barrier beyond
+which it could not pass: the mazes of
+fancy he explored, measured the stretch
+of thought, and, weighing all in an
+even balance, could tell whom nature
+had stamped an hero, a poet, or philosopher.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-111" id="DPg_4-111"></a>[<a href="images/v4-111.png">111</a>]</span>
+By their appearance, at a transient
+glance, he knew that the vessel must
+have contained many passengers, and
+that some of them were above the vulgar,
+with respect to fortune and education;
+he then walked leisurely among
+the dead, and narrowly observed their
+pallid features.</p>
+
+<p>His eye first rested on a form in which
+proportion reigned, and, stroking back
+the hair, a spacious forehead met his
+view; warm fancy had revelled there,
+and her airy dance had left vestiges,
+scarcely visible to a mortal eye. Some
+perpendicular lines pointed out that
+melancholy had predominated in his
+constitution; yet the straggling hairs
+of his eye-brows showed that anger had
+often shook his frame; indeed, the
+four temperatures, like the four elements,
+had resided in this little world,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-112" id="DPg_4-112"></a>[<a href="images/v4-112.png">112</a>]</span>
+and produced harmony. The whole
+visage was bony, and an energetic
+frown had knit the flexible skin of his
+brow; the kingdom within had been
+extensive; and the wild creations of
+fancy had there "a local habitation
+and a name." So exquisite was his
+sensibility, so quick his comprehension,
+that he perceived various combinations
+in an instant; he caught truth as she
+darted towards him, saw all her fair
+proportion at a glance, and the flash of
+his eye spoke the quick senses which
+conveyed intelligence to his mind; the
+sensorium indeed was capacious, and
+the sage imagined he saw the lucid
+beam, sparkling with love or ambition,
+in characters of fire, which a graceful
+curve of the upper eyelid shaded. The
+lips were a little deranged by contempt;
+and a mixture of vanity and<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-113" id="DPg_4-113"></a>[<a href="images/v4-113.png">113</a>]</span>
+self-complacency formed a few irregular
+lines round them. The chin had
+suffered from sensuality, yet there were
+still great marks of vigour in it, as if
+advanced with stern dignity. The
+hand accustomed to command, and even
+tyrannize, was unnerved; but its appearance
+convinced Sagestus, that he
+had oftener wielded a thought than a
+weapon; and that he had silenced, by
+irresistible conviction, the superficial
+disputant, and the being, who doubted
+because he had not strength to believe,
+who, wavering between different borrowed
+opinions, first caught at one
+straw, then at another, unable to settle
+into any consistency of character. After
+gazing a few moments, Sagestus turned
+away exclaiming, How are the stately
+oaks torn up by a tempest, and the bow<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-114" id="DPg_4-114"></a>[<a href="images/v4-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+unstrung, that could force the arrow
+beyond the ken of the eye!</p>
+
+<p>What a different face next met his
+view! The forehead was short, yet well
+set together; the nose small, but a little
+turned up at the end; and a draw-down
+at the sides of his mouth, proved that
+he had been a humourist, who minded
+the main chance, and could joke with
+his acquaintance, while he eagerly devoured
+a dainty which he was not to
+pay for. His lips shut like a box whose
+hinges had often been mended; and
+the muscles, which display the soft emotion
+of the heart on the cheeks, were
+grown quite rigid, so that, the vessels
+that should have moistened them not
+having much communication with the
+grand source of passions, the fine volatile
+fluid had evaporated, and they
+became mere dry fibres, which might<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-115" id="DPg_4-115"></a>[<a href="images/v4-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+be pulled by any misfortune that
+threatened himself, but were not sufficiently
+elastic to be moved by the
+miseries of others. His joints were
+inserted compactly, and with celerity
+they had performed all the animal
+functions, without any of the grace
+which results from the imagination
+mixing with the senses.</p>
+
+<p>A huge form was stretched near him,
+that exhibited marks of overgrown
+infancy; every part was relaxed; all
+appeared imperfect. Yet, some undulating
+lines on the puffed-out cheeks,
+displayed signs of timid, servile good
+nature; and the skin of the forehead
+had been so often drawn up by wonder,
+that the few hairs of the eyebrows were
+fixed in a sharp arch, whilst an ample
+chin rested in lobes of flesh on his protuberant
+breast.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-116" id="DPg_4-116"></a>[<a href="images/v4-116.png">116</a>]</span>
+By his side was a body that had
+scarcely ever much life in it&mdash;sympathy
+seemed to have drawn them together&mdash;every
+feature and limb was round and
+fleshy, and, if a kind of brutal cunning
+had not marked the face, it might have
+been mistaken for an automaton, so unmixed
+was the phlegmatic fluid. The
+vital spark was buried deep in a soft
+mass of matter, resembling the pith in
+young elder, which, when found, is so
+equivocal, that it only appears a moister
+part of the same body.</p>
+
+<p>Another part of the beach was
+covered with sailors, whose bodies exhibited
+marks of strength and brutal
+courage.&mdash;Their characters were all
+different, though of the same class;
+Sagestus did not stay to discriminate
+them, satisfied with a rough sketch.
+He saw indolence roused by a love of<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-117" id="DPg_4-117"></a>[<a href="images/v4-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+humour, or rather bodily fun; sensuality
+and prodigality with a vein of generosity
+running through it; a contempt
+of danger with gross superstition;
+supine senses, only to be kept alive by
+noisy, tumultuous pleasures, or that
+kind of novelty which borders on absurdity:
+this formed the common outline,
+and the rest were rather dabs than
+shades.</p>
+
+<p>Sagestus paused, and remembered it
+had been said by an earthly wit, that
+"many a flower is born to blush unseen,
+and waste its sweetness on the
+desart air." How little, he exclaimed,
+did that poet know of the ways of
+heaven! And yet, in this respect, they
+are direct; the hands before me, were
+designed to pull a rope, knock down a
+sheep, or perform the servile offices of
+life; no "mute, inglorious poet" rests<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-118" id="DPg_4-118"></a>[<a href="images/v4-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+amongst them, and he who is superior
+to his fellow, does not rise above mediocrity.
+The genius that sprouts from
+a dunghil soon shakes off the heterogenous
+mass; those only grovel, who
+have not power to fly.</p>
+
+<p>He turned his step towards the mother
+of the orphan: another female
+was at some distance; and a man who,
+by his garb, might have been the husband,
+or brother, of the former, was
+not far off.</p>
+
+<p>Him the sage surveyed with an attentive
+eye, and bowed with respect
+to the inanimate clay, that lately had
+been the dwelling of a most benevolent
+spirit. The head was square, though
+the features were not very prominent;
+but there was a great harmony in every
+part, and the turn of the nostrils and
+lips evinced, that the soul must have<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-119" id="DPg_4-119"></a>[<a href="images/v4-119.png">119</a>]</span>
+had taste, to which they had served as
+organs. Penetration and judgment
+were seated on the brows that overhung
+the eye. Fixed as it was, Sagestus
+quickly discerned the expression
+it must have had; dark and pensive,
+rather from slowness of comprehension
+than melancholy, it seemed to absorb
+the light of knowledge, to drink it in
+ray by ray; nay, a new one was not
+allowed to enter his head till the last
+was arranged: an opinion was thus
+cautiously received, and maturely
+weighed, before it was added to the
+general stock. As nature led him to
+mount from a part to the whole, he
+was most conversant with the beautiful,
+and rarely comprehended the sublime;
+yet, said Sagestus, with a softened tone,
+he was all heart, full of forbearance, and
+desirous to please every fellow-creature;<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-120" id="DPg_4-120"></a>[<a href="images/v4-120.png">120</a>]</span>
+but from a nobler motive than a love
+of admiration; the fumes of vanity
+never mounted to cloud his brain, or
+tarnish his beneficence. The fluid in
+which those placid eyes swam, is now
+congealed; how often has tenderness
+given them the finest water! Some
+torn parts of the child's dress hung
+round his arm, which led the sage to
+conclude, that he had saved the child;
+every line in his face confirmed the
+conjecture; benevolence indeed strung
+the nerves that naturally were not
+very firm; it was the great knot that
+tied together the scattered qualities,
+and gave the distinct stamp to the character.</p>
+
+<p>The female whom he next approached,
+and supposed to be an attendant on
+the other, was below the middle size,
+and her legs were so disproportionably<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-121" id="DPg_4-121"></a>[<a href="images/v4-121.png">121</a>]</span>
+short, that, when she moved, she must
+have waddled along; her elbows were
+drawn in to touch her long taper, waist,
+and the air of her whole body was an
+affectation of gentility. Death could
+not alter the rigid hang of her limbs, or
+efface the simper that had stretched her
+mouth; the lips were thin, as if nature
+intended she should mince her words;
+her nose was small, and sharp at the
+end; and the forehead, unmarked by
+eyebrows, was wrinkled by the discontent
+that had sunk her cheeks, on
+which Sagestus still discerned faint
+traces of tenderness; and fierce good-nature,
+he perceived had sometimes
+animated the little spark of an eye that
+anger had oftener lighted. The same
+thought occurred to him that the sight
+of the sailors had suggested, Men and
+women are all in their proper places<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-122" id="DPg_4-122"></a>[<a href="images/v4-122.png">122</a>]</span>&mdash;this
+female was intended to fold up
+linen and nurse the sick.</p>
+
+<p>Anxious to observe the mother of
+his charge, he turned to the lily that
+had been so rudely snapped, and, carefully
+observing it, traced every fine line
+to its source. There was a delicacy in
+her form, so truly feminine, that an involuntary
+desire to cherish such a being,
+made the sage again feel the almost forgotten
+sensations of his nature. On
+observing her more closely, he discovered
+that her natural delicacy had been
+increased by an improper education,
+to a degree that took away all vigour
+from her faculties. And its baneful
+influence had had such an effect on her
+mind, that few traces of the exertions
+of it appeared on her face, though the
+fine finish of her features, and particularly
+the form of the forehead, con<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-123" id="DPg_4-123"></a>[<a href="images/v4-123.png">123</a>]</span>vinced
+the sage that her understanding
+might have risen considerably above
+mediocrity, had the wheels ever been
+put in motion; but, clogged by prejudices,
+they never turned quite round,
+and, whenever she considered a subject,
+she stopped before she came to a conclusion.
+Assuming a mask of propriety,
+she had banished nature; yet
+its tendency was only to be diverted,
+not stifled. Some lines, which took
+from the symmetry of the mouth, not
+very obvious to a superficial observer,
+struck Sagestus, and they appeared to
+him characters of indolent obstinacy.
+Not having courage to form an opinion
+of her own, she adhered, with blind
+partiality, to those she adopted, which
+she received in the lump, and, as they
+always remained unopened, of course
+she only saw the even gloss on the out<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-124" id="DPg_4-124"></a>[<a href="images/v4-124.png">124</a>]</span>side.
+Vestiges of anger were visible on
+her brow, and the sage concluded, that
+she had often been offended with, and
+indeed would scarcely make any allowance
+for, those who did not coincide
+with her in opinion, as things always
+appear self-evident that have never
+been examined; yet her very weakness
+gave a charming timidity to her countenance;
+goodness and tenderness pervaded
+every lineament, and melted in
+her dark blue eyes. The compassion
+that wanted activity, was sincere, though
+it only embellished her face, or produced
+casual acts of charity when a
+moderate alms could relieve present
+distress. Unacquainted with life, fictitious,
+unnatural distress drew the tears
+that were not shed for real misery. In
+its own shape, human wretchedness
+excites a little disgust in the mind that<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-125" id="DPg_4-125"></a>[<a href="images/v4-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+has indulged sickly refinement. Perhaps
+the sage gave way to a little conjecture
+in drawing the last conclusion;
+but his conjectures generally arose from
+distinct ideas, and a dawn of light
+allowed him to see a great way farther
+than common mortals.</p>
+
+<p>He was now convinced that the orphan
+was not very unfortunate in having
+lost such a mother. The parent that
+inspires fond affection without respect,
+is seldom an useful one; and they only
+are respectable, who consider right and
+wrong abstracted from local forms and
+accidental modifications.</p>
+
+<p>Determined to adopt the child, he
+named it after himself, Sagesta, and
+retired to the hut where the innocent
+slept, to think of the best method of
+educating this child, whom the angry
+deep had spared.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-126" id="DPg_4-126"></a>[<a href="images/v4-126.png">126</a>]</span>
+[The last branch of the education of
+Sagesta, consisted of a variety of characters
+and stories presented to her
+in the Cave of Fancy, of which the
+following is a specimen.]</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-127" id="DPg_4-127"></a>[<a href="images/v4-127.png">127</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="CHAP" id="DCHAP"></a>CHAP.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">A form</span> now approached that
+particularly struck and interested Sagesta.
+The sage, observing what passed in her
+mind, bade her ever trust to the first
+impression. In life, he continued, try
+to remember the effect the first appearance
+of a stranger has on your mind;
+and, in proportion to your sensibility,
+you may decide on the character. Intelligence
+glances from eyes that have
+the same pursuits, and a benevolent
+heart soon traces the marks of benevolence
+on the countenance of an unknown
+fellow-creature; and not only
+the countenance, but the gestures, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-128" id="DPg_4-128"></a>[<a href="images/v4-128.png">128</a>]</span>
+voice, loudly speak truth to the unprejudiced
+mind.</p>
+
+<p>Whenever a stranger advances towards
+you with a tripping step, receives
+you with broad smiles, and a profusion
+of compliments, and yet you find yourself
+embarrassed and unable to return
+the salutation with equal cordiality, be
+assured that such a person is affected,
+and endeavours to maintain a very good
+character in the eyes of the world,
+without really practising the social virtues
+which dress the face in looks of
+unfeigned complacency. Kindred minds
+are drawn to each other by expressions
+which elude description; and, like the
+calm breeze that plays on a smooth
+lake, they are rather felt than seen.
+Beware of a man who always appears in
+good humour; a selfish design too frequently
+lurks in the smiles the heart<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-129" id="DPg_4-129"></a>[<a href="images/v4-129.png">129</a>]</span>
+never curved; or there is an affectation
+of candour that destroys all strength of
+character, by blending truth and falshood
+into an unmeaning mass. The
+mouth, in fact, seems to be the feature
+where you may trace every kind of dissimulation,
+from the simper of vanity,
+to the fixed smile of the designing villain.
+Perhaps, the modulations of
+the voice will still more quickly give
+a key to the character than even the
+turns of the mouth, or the words
+that issue from it; often do the
+tones of unpractised dissemblers give
+the lie to their assertions. Many
+people never speak in an unnatural
+voice, but when they are insincere: the
+phrases not corresponding with the
+dictates of the heart, have nothing to
+keep them in tune. In the course of
+an argument however, you may easily
+discover whether vanity or conviction<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-130" id="DPg_4-130"></a>[<a href="images/v4-130.png">130</a>]</span>
+stimulates the disputant, though his
+inflated countenance may be turned
+from you, and you may not see the
+gestures which mark self-sufficiency.
+He stopped, and the spirit began.</p>
+
+<p>I have wandered through the cave;
+and, as soon as I have taught you a useful
+lesson, I shall take my flight where
+my tears will cease to flow, and where
+mine eyes will no more be shocked
+with the sight of guilt and sorrow.
+Before many moons have changed,
+thou wilt enter, O mortal! into that
+world I have lately left. Listen to my
+warning voice, and trust not too much
+to the goodness which I perceive resides
+in thy breast. Let it be reined in by
+principles, lest thy very virtue sharpen
+the sting of remorse, which as naturally
+follows disorder in the moral world, as
+pain attends on intemperance in the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-131" id="DPg_4-131"></a>[<a href="images/v4-131.png">131</a>]</span>
+physical. But my history will afford you
+more instruction than mere advice. Sagestus
+concurred in opinion with her,
+observing that the senses of children
+should be the first object of improvement;
+then their passions worked on; and judgment
+the fruit, must be the acquirement
+of the being itself, when out of
+leading-strings. The spirit bowed assent,
+and, without any further prelude,
+entered on her history.</p>
+
+<p>My mother was a most respectable
+character, but she was yoked to a man
+whose follies and vices made her ever
+feel the weight of her chains. The
+first sensation I recollect, was pity; for
+I have seen her weep over me and the
+rest of her babes, lamenting that the
+extravagance of a father would throw
+us destitute on the world. But, though
+my father was extravagant, and seldom<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-132" id="DPg_4-132"></a>[<a href="images/v4-132.png">132</a>]</span>
+thought of any thing but his own pleasures,
+our education was not neglected.
+In solitude, this employment was my
+mother's only solace; and my father's
+pride made him procure us masters;
+nay, sometimes he was so gratified by
+our improvement, that he would embrace
+us with tenderness, and intreat
+my mother to forgive him, with marks
+of real contrition. But the affection his
+penitence gave rise to, only served to
+expose her to continual disappointments,
+and keep hope alive merely to
+torment her. After a violent debauch
+he would let his beard grow, and the
+sadness that reigned in the house I shall
+never forget; he was ashamed to meet
+even the eyes of his children. This is so
+contrary to the nature of things, it
+gave me exquisite pain; I used, at those
+times, to show him extreme respect. I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-133" id="DPg_4-133"></a>[<a href="images/v4-133.png">133</a>]</span>
+could not bear to see my parent humble
+himself before me. However neither
+his constitution, nor fortune could
+long bear the constant waste. He had,
+I have observed, a childish affection
+for his children, which was displayed
+in caresses that gratified him for the
+moment, yet never restrained the headlong
+fury of his appetites; his momentary
+repentance wrung his heart, without
+influencing his conduct; and he died,
+leaving an encumbered wreck of a good
+estate.</p>
+
+<p>As we had always lived in splendid
+poverty, rather than in affluence, the
+shock was not so great; and my mother
+repressed her anguish, and concealed
+some circumstances, that she might not
+shed a destructive mildew over the
+gaiety of youth.</p>
+
+<p>So fondly did I doat on this dear pa<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-134" id="DPg_4-134"></a>[<a href="images/v4-134.png">134</a>]</span>rent,
+that she engrossed all my tenderness;
+her sorrows had knit me firmly to
+her, and my chief care was to give her
+proofs of affection. The gallantry that
+afforded my companions, the few young
+people my mother forced me to mix
+with, so much pleasure, I despised; I
+wished more to be loved than admired,
+for I could love. I adored virtue; and
+my imagination, chasing a chimerical
+object, overlooked the common pleasures
+of life; they were not sufficient for my
+happiness. A latent fire made me burn
+to rise superior to my contemporaries in
+wisdom and virtue; and tears of joy
+and emulation filled my eyes when I
+read an account of a great action&mdash;I
+felt admiration, not astonishment.</p>
+
+<p>My mother had two particular friends,
+who endeavoured to settle her affairs;
+one was a middle-aged man, a mer<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-135" id="DPg_4-135"></a>[<a href="images/v4-135.png">135</a>]</span>chant;
+the human breast never enshrined
+a more benevolent heart. His
+manners were rather rough, and he
+bluntly spoke his thoughts without observing
+the pain it gave; yet he possessed
+extreme tenderness, as far as his discernment
+went. Men do not make
+sufficient distinction, said she, digressing
+from her story to address Sagestus, between
+tenderness and sensibility.</p>
+
+<p>To give the shortest definition of sensibility,
+replied the sage, I should say
+that it is the result of acute senses, finely
+fashioned nerves, which vibrate at the
+slightest touch, and convey such clear intelligence
+to the brain, that it does not
+require to be arranged by the judgment.
+Such persons instantly enter into the
+characters of others, and instinctively
+discern what will give pain to every
+human being; their own feelings are<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-136" id="DPg_4-136"></a>[<a href="images/v4-136.png">136</a>]</span>
+so varied that they seem to contain in
+themselves, not only all the passions of the
+species, but their various modifications.
+Exquisite pain and pleasure is their
+portion; nature wears for them a different
+aspect than is displayed to common
+mortals. One moment it is a paradise;
+all is beautiful: a cloud arises, an emotion
+receives a sudden damp; darkness
+invades the sky, and the world is an
+unweeded garden;&mdash;but go on with
+your narrative, said Sagestus, recollecting
+himself.</p>
+
+<p>She proceeded. The man I am describing
+was humanity itself; but frequently
+he did not understand me; many of my
+feelings were not to be analyzed by
+his common sense. His friendships,
+for he had many friends, gave him pleasure
+unmixed with pain; his religion
+was coldly reasonable, because he want<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-137" id="DPg_4-137"></a>[<a href="images/v4-137.png">137</a>]</span>ed
+fancy, and he did not feel the necessity
+of finding, or creating, a perfect
+object, to answer the one engraved on
+his heart: the sketch there was faint.
+He went with the stream, and rather
+caught a character from the society he
+lived in, than spread one around him.
+In my mind many opinions were graven
+with a pen of brass, which he thought
+chimerical: but time could not erase
+them, and I now recognize them as
+the seeds of eternal happiness: they
+will soon expand in those realms where
+I shall enjoy the bliss adapted to my
+nature; this is all we need ask of the
+Supreme Being; happiness must follow
+the completion of his designs. He
+however could live quietly, without
+giving a preponderancy to many important
+opinions that continually obtruded
+on my mind; not having an en<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-138" id="DPg_4-138"></a>[<a href="images/v4-138.png">138</a>]</span>thusiastic
+affection for his fellow creatures,
+he did them good, without suffering
+from their follies. He was particularly
+attached to me, and I felt for
+him all the affection of a daughter;
+often, when he had been interesting
+himself to promote my welfare, have I
+lamented that he was not my father;
+lamented that the vices of mine had
+dried up one source of pure affection.</p>
+
+<p>The other friend I have already alluded
+to, was of a very different character;
+greatness of mind, and those
+combinations of feeling which are so
+difficult to describe, raised him above
+the throng, that bustle their hour out,
+lie down to sleep, and are forgotten.
+But I shall soon see him, she exclaimed,
+as much superior to his former self, as
+he then rose in my eyes above his fellow
+creatures! As she spoke, a glow<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-139" id="DPg_4-139"></a>[<a href="images/v4-139.png">139</a>]</span>
+of delight animated each feature; her
+countenance appeared transparent; and
+she silently anticipated the happiness
+she should enjoy, when she entered those
+mansions, where death-divided friends
+should meet, to part no more; where
+human weakness could not damp their
+bliss, or poison the cup of joy that, on
+earth, drops from the lips as soon as
+tasted, or, if some daring mortal snatches
+a hasty draught, what was sweet to the
+taste becomes a root of bitterness.</p>
+
+<p>He was unfortunate, had many cares
+to struggle with, and I marked on his
+cheeks traces of the same sorrows that
+sunk my own. He was unhappy I say,
+and perhaps pity might first have awoke
+my tenderness; for, early in life, an
+artful woman worked on his compassionate
+soul, and he united his fate to
+a being made up of such jarring ele<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-140" id="DPg_4-140"></a>[<a href="images/v4-140.png">140</a>]</span>ments,
+that he was still alone. The
+discovery did not extinguish that propensity
+to love, a high sense of virtue
+fed. I saw him sick and unhappy,
+without a friend to sooth the hours
+languor made heavy; often did I sit a
+long winter's evening by his side, railing
+at the swift wings of time, and
+terming my love, humanity.</p>
+
+<p>Two years passed in this manner, silently
+rooting my affection; and it might
+have continued calm, if a fever had
+not brought him to the very verge of
+the grave. Though still deceived, I was
+miserable that the customs of the world
+did not allow me to watch by him;
+when sleep forsook his pillow, my wearied
+eyes were not closed, and my
+anxious spirit hovered round his bed.
+I saw him, before he had recovered his
+strength; and, when his hand touched<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-141" id="DPg_4-141"></a>[<a href="images/v4-141.png">141</a>]</span>
+mine, life almost retired, or flew to
+meet the touch. The first look found
+a ready way to my heart, and thrilled
+through every vein. We were left
+alone, and insensibly began to talk of
+the immortality of the soul; I declared
+that I could not live without this conviction.
+In the ardour of conversation
+he pressed my hand to his heart; it
+rested there a moment, and my emotions
+gave weight to my opinion, for
+the affection we felt was not of a perishable
+nature.&mdash;A silence ensued, I
+know not how long; he then threw
+my hand from him, as if it had been a
+serpent; formally complained of the
+weather, and adverted to twenty other
+uninteresting subjects. Vain efforts!
+Our hearts had already spoken to
+each other.</p>
+
+<p>Feebly did I afterwards combat an<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-142" id="DPg_4-142"></a>[<a href="images/v4-142.png">142</a>]</span>
+affection, which seemed twisted in every
+fibre of my heart. The world stood still
+when I thought of him; it moved heavily
+at best, with one whose very constitution
+seemed to mark her out for misery.
+But I will not dwell on the passion
+I too fondly nursed. One only refuge
+had I on earth; I could not resolutely
+desolate the scene my fancy flew to,
+when worldly cares, when a knowledge
+of mankind, which my circumstances
+forced on me, rendered every other
+insipid. I was afraid of the unmarked
+vacuity of common life; yet, though I
+supinely indulged myself in fairy-land,
+when I ought to have been more actively
+employed, virtue was still the
+first mover of my actions; she dressed
+my love in such enchanting colours,
+and spread the net I could never break.
+Our corresponding feelings confounded<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-143" id="DPg_4-143"></a>[<a href="images/v4-143.png">143</a>]</span>
+our very souls; and in many conversations
+we almost intuitively discerned
+each other's sentiments; the heart opened
+itself, not chilled by reserve, nor
+afraid of misconstruction. But, if virtue
+inspired love, love gave new energy to
+virtue, and absorbed every selfish passion.
+Never did even a wish escape
+me, that my lover should not fulfil the
+hard duties which fate had imposed on
+him. I only dissembled with him in
+one particular; I endeavoured to soften
+his wife's too conspicuous follies, and
+extenuated her failings in an indirect
+manner. To this I was prompted by a
+loftiness of spirit; I should have broken
+the band of life, had I ceased to respect
+myself. But I will hasten to an important
+change in my circumstances.</p>
+
+<p>My mother, who had concealed the
+real state of her affairs from me, was<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-144" id="DPg_4-144"></a>[<a href="images/v4-144.png">144</a>]</span>
+now impelled to make me her confident,
+that I might assist to discharge
+her mighty debt of gratitude. The
+merchant, my more than father, had
+privately assisted her: but a fatal civil-war
+reduced his large property to a
+bare competency; and an inflammation
+in his eyes, that arose from a cold he
+had caught at a wreck, which he watched
+during a stormy night to keep off
+the lawless colliers, almost deprived
+him of sight. His life had been spent
+in society, and he scarcely knew how
+to fill the void; for his spirit would not
+allow him to mix with his former
+equals as an humble companion; he
+who had been treated with uncommon
+respect, could not brook their insulting
+pity. From the resource of solitude,
+reading, the complaint in his eyes cut<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-145" id="DPg_4-145"></a>[<a href="images/v4-145.png">145</a>]</span>
+him off, and he became our constant
+visitor.</p>
+
+<p>Actuated by the sincerest affection,
+I used to read to him, and he mistook
+my tenderness for love. How could I
+undeceive him, when every circumstance
+frowned on him! Too soon I
+found that I was his only comfort; I,
+who rejected his hand when fortune
+smiled, could not now second her blow;
+and, in a moment of enthusiastic gratitude
+and tender compassion, I offered
+him my hand.&mdash;It was received with
+pleasure; transport was not made for
+his soul; nor did he discover that nature
+had separated us, by making me
+alive to such different sensations. My
+mother was to live with us, and I
+dwelt on this circumstance to banish
+cruel recollections, when the bent bow
+returned to its former state.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-146" id="DPg_4-146"></a>[<a href="images/v4-146.png">146</a>]</span>
+With a bursting heart and a firm
+voice, I named the day when I was to
+seal my promise. It came, in spite of
+my regret; I had been previously preparing
+myself for the awful ceremony,
+and answered the solemn question with
+a resolute tone, that would silence the
+dictates of my heart; it was a forced,
+unvaried one; had nature modulated
+it, my secret would have escaped. My
+active spirit was painfully on the watch
+to repress every tender emotion. The
+joy in my venerable parent's countenance,
+the tenderness of my husband,
+as he conducted me home, for I really
+had a sincere affection for him, the gratulations
+of my mind, when I thought
+that this sacrifice was heroic, all tended
+to deceive me; but the joy of victory
+over the resigned, pallid look of my
+lover, haunted my imagination, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-147" id="DPg_4-147"></a>[<a href="images/v4-147.png">147</a>]</span>
+fixed itself in the centre of my brain.&mdash;Still
+I imagined, that his spirit was near
+me, that he only felt sorrow for my
+loss, and without complaint resigned
+me to my duty.</p>
+
+<p>I was left alone a moment; my two
+elbows rested on a table to support my
+chin. Ten thousand thoughts darted
+with astonishing velocity through my
+mind. My eyes were dry; I was on the
+brink of madness. At this moment a
+strange association was made by my
+imagination; I thought of Gallileo, who
+when he left the inquisition, looked
+upwards, and cried out, "Yet it moves."
+A shower of tears, like the refreshing
+drops of heaven, relieved my parched
+sockets; they fell disregarded on the
+table; and, stamping with my foot, in an
+agony I exclaimed, "Yet I love." My
+husband entered before I had calmed<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-148" id="DPg_4-148"></a>[<a href="images/v4-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+these tumultuous emotions, and tenderly
+took my hand. I snatched it from
+him; grief and surprise were marked
+on his countenance; I hastily stretched
+it out again. My heart smote me, and I
+removed the transient mist by an unfeigned
+endeavour to please him.</p>
+
+<p>A few months after, my mind grew
+calmer; and, if a treacherous imagination,
+if feelings many accidents revived,
+sometimes plunged me into melancholy,
+I often repeated with steady
+conviction, that virtue was not an
+empty name, and that, in following the
+dictates of duty, I had not bidden adieu
+to content.</p>
+
+<p>In the course of a few years, the
+dear object of my fondest affection,
+said farewel, in dying accents. Thus
+left alone, my grief became dear; and I
+did not feel solitary, because I thought<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-149" id="DPg_4-149"></a>[<a href="images/v4-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+I might, without a crime, indulge a
+passion, that grew more ardent than ever
+when my imagination only presented
+him to my view, and restored my former
+activity of soul which the late
+calm had rendered torpid. I seemed to
+find myself again, to find the eccentric
+warmth that gave me identity of character.
+Reason had governed my conduct,
+but could not change my nature;
+this voluptuous sorrow was superior to
+every gratification of sense, and death
+more firmly united our hearts.</p>
+
+<p>Alive to every human affection, I
+smoothed my mothers passage to eternity,
+and so often gave my husband
+sincere proofs of affection, he never
+supposed that I was actuated by a more
+fervent attachment. My melancholy,
+my uneven spirits, he attributed to my
+extreme sensibility, and loved me the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-150" id="DPg_4-150"></a>[<a href="images/v4-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+better for possessing qualities he could
+not comprehend.</p>
+
+<p>At the close of a summer's day, some
+years after, I wandered with careless
+steps over a pathless common; various
+anxieties had rendered the hours which
+the sun had enlightened heavy; sober
+evening came on; I wished to still "my
+mind, and woo lone quiet in her silent
+walk." The scene accorded with my
+feelings; it was wild and grand; and
+the spreading twilight had almost confounded
+the distant sea with the barren,
+blue hills that melted from my sight.
+I sat down on a rising ground; the rays
+of the departing sun illumined the horizon,
+but so indistinctly, that I anticipated
+their total extinction. The
+death of Nature led me to a still more
+interesting subject, that came home to
+my bosom, the death of him I loved.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-151" id="DPg_4-151"></a>[<a href="images/v4-151.png">151</a>]</span>
+A village-bell was tolling; I listened,
+and thought of the moment when I
+heard his interrupted breath, and felt
+the agonizing fear, that the same sound
+would never more reach my ears, and
+that the intelligence glanced from my
+eyes, would no more be felt. The
+spoiler had seized his prey; the sun
+was fled, what was this world to me!
+I wandered to another, where death
+and darkness could not enter; I pursued
+the sun beyond the mountains,
+and the soul escaped from this vale of
+tears. My reflections were tinged with
+melancholy, but they were sublime.&mdash;I
+grasped a mighty whole, and smiled
+on the king of terrors; the tie which
+bound me to my friends he could not
+break; the same mysterious knot united
+me to the source of all goodness and
+happiness. I had seen the divinity re<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-152" id="DPg_4-152"></a>[<a href="images/v4-152.png">152</a>]</span>flected
+in a face I loved; I had read
+immortal characters displayed on a
+human countenance, and forgot myself
+whilst I gazed. I could not think of
+immortality, without recollecting the
+ecstacy I felt, when my heart first whispered
+to me that I was beloved; and
+again did I feel the sacred tie of mutual
+affection; fervently I prayed to the father
+of mercies; and rejoiced that he
+could see every turn of a heart, whose
+movements I could not perfectly understand.
+My passion seemed a pledge
+of immortality; I did not wish to hide
+it from the all-searching eye of heaven.
+Where indeed could I go from his presence?
+and, whilst it was dear to me,
+though darkness might reign during
+the night of life, joy would come when
+I awoke to life everlasting.</p>
+
+<p>I now turned my step towards home,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-153" id="DPg_4-153"></a>[<a href="images/v4-153.png">153</a>]</span>
+when the appearance of a girl, who
+stood weeping on the common, attracted
+my attention. I accosted her,
+and soon heard her simple tale; that her
+father was gone to sea, and her mother
+sick in bed. I followed her to their
+little dwelling, and relieved the sick
+wretch. I then again sought my own
+abode; but death did not now haunt
+my fancy. Contriving to give the poor
+creature I had left more effectual relief,
+I reached my own garden-gate very
+weary, and rested on it.&mdash;Recollecting
+the turns of my mind during the walk,
+I exclaimed, Surely life may thus be
+enlivened by active benevolence, and
+the sleep of death, like that I am now
+disposed to fall into, may be sweet!</p>
+
+<p>My life was now unmarked by any
+extraordinary change, and a few days<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-154" id="DPg_4-154"></a>[<a href="images/v4-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+ago I entered this cavern; for through
+it every mortal must pass; and here I
+have discovered, that I neglected many
+opportunities of being useful, whilst I
+fostered a devouring flame. Remorse
+has not reached me, because I firmly
+adhered to my principles, and I have
+also discovered that I saw through a
+false medium. Worthy as the mortal
+was I adored, I should not long have
+loved him with the ardour I did, had
+fate united us, and broken the delusion
+the imagination so artfully wove. His
+virtues, as they now do, would have
+extorted my esteem; but he who formed
+the human soul, only can fill it, and the
+chief happiness of an immortal being
+must arise from the same source as its
+existence. Earthly love leads to heavenly,
+and prepares us for a more ex<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-155" id="DPg_4-155"></a>[<a href="images/v4-155.png">155</a>]</span>alted
+state; if it does not change its
+nature, and destroy itself, by trampling
+on the virtue, that constitutes its essence,
+and allies us to the Deity.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-156" id="DPg_4-156"></a>[<a href="images/v4-156.png">156</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-157" id="DPg_4-157"></a>[<a href="images/v4-157.png">157</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h4><a name="ON" id="DON"></a>ON</h4>
+
+<h2>POETRY,</h2>
+
+<h4>AND</h4>
+
+<h3>OUR RELISH FOR THE BEAUTIES OF NATURE.</h3>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-158" id="DPg_4-158"></a>[<a href="images/v4-158.png">158</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-159" id="DPg_4-159"></a>[<a href="images/v4-159.png">159</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h3>ON</h3>
+
+<h2>POETRY, &amp;c.</h2>
+<hr class="short" />
+<p><span class="smcap">A taste</span> for rural scenes, in the
+present state of society, appears to be
+very often an artificial sentiment, rather
+inspired by poetry and romances,
+than a real perception of the beauties
+of nature. But, as it is reckoned a
+proof of refined taste to praise the calm
+pleasures which the country affords, the
+theme is never exhausted. Yet it may
+be made a question, whether this ro<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-160" id="DPg_4-160"></a>[<a href="images/v4-160.png">160</a>]</span>mantic
+kind of declamation, has much
+effect on the conduct of those, who
+leave, for a season, the crowded cities
+in which they were bred.</p>
+
+<p>I have been led to these reflections,
+by observing, when I have resided for
+any length of time in the country, how
+few people seem to contemplate nature
+with their own eyes. I have "brushed
+the dew away" in the morning; but,
+pacing over the printless grass, I have
+wondered that, in such delightful situations,
+the sun was allowed to rise in
+solitary majesty, whilst my eyes alone
+hailed its beautifying beams. The
+webs of the evening have still been
+spread across the hedged path, unless
+some labouring man, trudging to work,
+disturbed the fairy structure; yet, in
+spite of this supineness, when I joined<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-161" id="DPg_4-161"></a>[<a href="images/v4-161.png">161</a>]</span>
+the social circle, every tongue rang
+changes on the pleasures of the country.</p>
+
+<p>Having frequently had occasion to
+make the same observation, I was led to
+endeavour, in one of my solitary rambles,
+to trace the cause, and likewise
+to enquire why the poetry written in
+the infancy of society, is most natural:
+which, strictly speaking (for <i>natural</i>
+is a very indefinite expression) is merely
+to say, that it is the transcript of immediate
+sensations, in all their native
+wildness and simplicity, when fancy,
+awakened by the sight of interesting
+objects, was most actively at work.
+At such moments, sensibility quickly
+furnishes similes, and the sublimated
+spirits combine images, which rising
+spontaneously, it is not necessary coldly
+to ransack the understanding or memory,
+till the laborious efforts of judg<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-162" id="DPg_4-162"></a>[<a href="images/v4-162.png">162</a>]</span>ment
+exclude present sensations, and
+damp the fire of enthusiasm.</p>
+
+<p>The effusions of a vigorous mind, will
+ever tell us how far the understanding
+has been enlarged by thought, and
+stored with knowledge. The richness
+of the soil even appears on the surface;
+and the result of profound thinking,
+often mixing, with playful grace, in the
+reveries of the poet, smoothly incorporates
+with the ebullitions of animal
+spirits, when the finely fashioned nerve
+vibrates acutely with rapture, or when,
+relaxed by soft melancholy, a pleasing
+languor prompts the long-drawn sigh,
+and feeds the slowly falling tear.</p>
+
+<p>The poet, the man of strong feelings,
+gives us only an image of his mind,
+when he was actually alone, conversing
+with himself, and marking the impression
+which nature had made on his<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-163" id="DPg_4-163"></a>[<a href="images/v4-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+own heart.&mdash;If, at this sacred moment,
+the idea of some departed friend, some
+tender recollection when the soul was
+most alive to tenderness, intruded unawares
+into his thoughts, the sorrow
+which it produced is artlessly, yet poetically
+expressed&mdash;and who can avoid
+sympathizing?</p>
+
+<p>Love to man leads to devotion&mdash;grand
+and sublime images strike the
+imagination&mdash;God is seen in every
+floating cloud, and comes from the
+misty mountain to receive the noblest
+homage of an intelligent creature&mdash;praise.
+How solemn is the moment,
+when all affections and remembrances
+fade before the sublime admiration
+which the wisdom and goodness of God
+inspires, when he is worshipped in a
+<i>temple not made with hands</i>, and the
+world seems to contain only the mind<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-164" id="DPg_4-164"></a>[<a href="images/v4-164.png">164</a>]</span>
+that formed, and the mind that contemplates
+it! These are not the weak
+responses of ceremonial devotion; nor,
+to express them, would the poet need
+another poet's aid: his heart burns
+within him, and he speaks the language
+of truth and nature with resistless
+energy.</p>
+
+<p>Inequalities, of course, are observable
+in his effusions; and a less vigorous
+fancy, with more taste, would
+have produced more elegance and uniformity;
+but, as passages are softened
+or expunged during the cooler moments
+of reflection, the understanding
+is gratified at the expence of those involuntary
+sensations, which, like the
+beauteous tints of an evening sky, are
+so evanescent, that they melt into new
+forms before they can be analyzed. For
+however eloquently we may boast of<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-165" id="DPg_4-165"></a>[<a href="images/v4-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+our reason, man must often be delighted
+he cannot tell why, or his blunt
+feelings are not made to relish the beauties
+which nature, poetry, or any of
+the imitative arts, afford.</p>
+
+<p>The imagery of the ancients seems
+naturally to have been borrowed from
+surrounding objects and their mythology.
+When a hero is to be transported
+from one place to another, across
+pathless wastes, is any vehicle so natural,
+as one of the fleecy clouds on which
+the poet has often gazed, scarcely conscious
+that he wished to make it his
+chariot? Again, when nature seems
+to present obstacles to his progress at
+almost every step, when the tangled
+forest and steep mountain stand as barriers,
+to pass over which the mind
+longs for supernatural aid; an interposing
+deity, who walks on the waves,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-166" id="DPg_4-166"></a>[<a href="images/v4-166.png">166</a>]</span>
+and rules the storm, severely felt in the
+first attempts to cultivate a country,
+will receive from the impassioned fancy
+"a local habitation and a name."</p>
+
+<p>It would be a philosophical enquiry,
+and throw some light on the history of
+the human mind, to trace, as far as our
+information will allow us to trace, the
+spontaneous feelings and ideas which
+have produced the images that now
+frequently appear unnatural, because
+they are remote; and disgusting, because
+they have been servilely copied
+by poets, whose habits of thinking,
+and views of nature must have been
+different; for, though the understanding
+seldom disturbs the current of our present
+feelings, without dissipating the
+gay clouds which fancy has been embracing,
+yet it silently gives the colour
+to the whole tenour of them, and the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-167" id="DPg_4-167"></a>[<a href="images/v4-167.png">167</a>]</span>
+dream is over, when truth is grossly
+violated, or images introduced, selected
+from books, and not from local manners
+or popular prejudices.</p>
+
+<p>In a more advanced state of civilization,
+a poet is rather the creature of
+art, than of nature. The books that he
+reads in his youth, become a hot-bed
+in which artificial fruits are produced,
+beautiful to the common eye, though
+they want the true hue and flavour.
+His images do not arise from sensations;
+they are copies; and, like the works
+of the painters who copy ancient statues
+when they draw men and women
+of their own times, we acknowledge
+that the features are fine, and the proportions
+just; yet they are men of
+stone; insipid figures, that never convey
+to the mind the idea of a portrait
+taken from life, where the soul gives<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-168" id="DPg_4-168"></a>[<a href="images/v4-168.png">168</a>]</span>
+spirit and homogeneity to the whole.
+The silken wings of fancy are shrivelled
+by rules; and a desire of attaining
+elegance of diction, occasions an attention
+to words, incompatible with
+sublime, impassioned thoughts.</p>
+
+<p>A boy of abilities, who has been
+taught the structure of verse at school,
+and been roused by emulation to compose
+rhymes whilst he was reading
+works of genius, may, by practice,
+produce pretty verses, and even become
+what is often termed an elegant
+poet: yet his readers, without knowing
+what to find fault with, do not
+find themselves warmly interested. In
+the works of the poets who fasten on
+their affections, they see grosser faults,
+and the very images which shock their
+taste in the modern; still they do not appear
+as puerile or extrinsic in one as the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-169" id="DPg_4-169"></a>[<a href="images/v4-169.png">169</a>]</span>
+other.&mdash;Why?&mdash;because they did not
+appear so to the author.</p>
+
+<p>It may sound paradoxical, after observing
+that those productions want
+vigour, that are merely the work of
+imitation, in which the understanding
+has violently directed, if not extinguished,
+the blaze of fancy, to assert, that,
+though genius be only another word
+for exquisite sensibility, the first observers
+of nature, the true poets, exercised
+their understanding much more
+than their imitators. But they exercised
+it to discriminate things, whilst
+their followers were busy to borrow
+sentiments and arrange words.</p>
+
+<p>Boys who have received a classical
+education, load their memory with
+words, and the correspondent ideas
+are perhaps never distinctly comprehended.
+As a proof of this assertion,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-170" id="DPg_4-170"></a>[<a href="images/v4-170.png">170</a>]</span>
+I must observe, that I have known
+many young people who could write
+tolerably smooth verses, and string epithets
+prettily together, when their
+prose themes showed the barrenness of
+their minds, and how superficial the
+cultivation must have been, which
+their understanding had received.</p>
+
+<p>Dr. Johnson, I know, has given a definition
+of genius, which would overturn
+my reasoning, if I were to admit
+it.&mdash;He imagines, that <i>a strong mind,
+accidentally led to some particular study</i> in
+which it excels, is a genius.&mdash;Not to
+stop to investigate the causes which
+produced this happy <i>strength</i> of mind,
+experience seems to prove, that those
+minds have appeared most vigorous,
+that have pursued a study, after nature
+had discovered a bent; for it would be
+absurd to suppose, that a slight impres<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-171" id="DPg_4-171"></a>[<a href="images/v4-171.png">171</a>]</span>sion
+made on the weak faculties of a
+boy, is the fiat of fate, and not to be
+effaced by any succeeding impression,
+or unexpected difficulty. Dr. Johnson
+in fact, appears sometimes to be of the
+same opinion (how consistently I shall
+not now enquire), especially when he
+observes, "that Thomson looked on
+nature with the eye which she only
+gives to a poet."</p>
+
+<p>But, though it should be allowed
+that books may produce some poets, I
+fear they will never be the poets who
+charm our cares to sleep, or extort admiration.
+They may diffuse taste, and
+polish the language; but I am inclined
+to conclude that they will seldom rouse
+the passions, or amend the heart.</p>
+
+<p>And, to return to the first subject of
+discussion, the reason why most people
+are more interested by a scene describ<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-172" id="DPg_4-172"></a>[<a href="images/v4-172.png">172</a>]</span>ed
+by a poet, than by a view of nature,
+probably arises from the want of a
+lively imagination. The poet contracts
+the prospect, and, selecting the most
+picturesque part in his <i>camera</i>, the judgment
+is directed, and the whole force
+of the languid faculty turned towards
+the objects which excited the most
+forcible emotions in the poet's heart;
+the reader consequently feels the enlivened
+description, though he was not
+able to receive a first impression from
+the operations of his own mind.</p>
+
+<p>Besides, it may be further observed,
+that gross minds are only to be moved
+by forcible representations. To rouse
+the thoughtless, objects must be presented,
+calculated to produce tumultuous
+emotions; the unsubstantial, picturesque
+forms which a contemplative
+man gazes on, and often follows with<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-173" id="DPg_4-173"></a>[<a href="images/v4-173.png">173</a>]</span>
+ardour till he is mocked by a glimpse
+of unattainable excellence, appear to
+them the light vapours of a dreaming
+enthusiast, who gives up the substance
+for the shadow. It is not within that
+they seek amusement; their eyes are
+seldom turned on themselves; consequently
+their emotions, though sometimes
+fervid, are always transient, and
+the nicer perceptions which distinguish
+the man of genuine taste, are not felt,
+or make such a slight impression as
+scarcely to excite any pleasurable sensations.
+Is it surprising then that they
+are often overlooked, even by those
+who are delighted by the same images
+concentrated by the poet?</p>
+
+<p>But even this numerous class is exceeded,
+by witlings, who, anxious
+to appear to have wit and taste, do
+not allow their understandings or feel<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-174" id="DPg_4-174"></a>[<a href="images/v4-174.png">174</a>]</span>ings
+any liberty; for, instead of cultivating
+their faculties and reflecting on
+their operations, they are busy collecting
+prejudices; and are predetermined
+to admire what the suffrage of time
+announces as excellent, not to store up
+a fund of amusement for themselves,
+but to enable them to talk.</p>
+
+<p>These hints will assist the reader to
+trace some of the causes why the beauties
+of nature are not forcibly felt,
+when civilization, or rather luxury,
+has made considerable advances&mdash;those
+calm sensations are not sufficiently
+lively to serve as a relaxation to the voluptuary,
+or even to the moderate pursuer
+of artificial pleasures. In the present
+state of society, the understanding
+must bring back the feelings to nature,
+or the sensibility must have such native
+strength, as rather to be whetted than<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-175" id="DPg_4-175"></a>[<a href="images/v4-175.png">175</a>]</span>
+destroyed by the strong exercises of
+passion.</p>
+
+<p>That the most valuable things are liable
+to the greatest perversion, is however
+as trite as true:&mdash;for the same sensibility,
+or quickness of senses, which
+makes a man relish the tranquil scenes
+of nature, when sensation, rather than
+reason, imparts delight, frequently makes
+a libertine of him, by leading him to
+prefer the sensual tumult of love a
+little refined by sentiment, to the calm
+pleasures of affectionate friendship, in
+whose sober satisfactions, reason, mixing
+her tranquillizing convictions, whispers,
+that content, not happiness, is the
+reward of virtue in this world.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-176" id="DPg_4-176"></a>[<a href="images/v4-176.png">176</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-177" id="DPg_4-177"></a>[<a href="images/v4-177.png">177</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="HINTS" id="DHINTS"></a>HINTS.</h2>
+
+<h3>[<i>Chiefly designed to have been incorporated<br />
+in the Second Part of the</i> Vindication<br />
+of the Rights of Woman.]</h3>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-178" id="DPg_4-178"></a>[<a href="images/v4-178.png">178</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-179" id="DPg_4-179"></a>[<a href="images/v4-179.png">179</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>HINTS.</h2>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+<p class="center">1.</p>
+<p><span class="smcap">Indolence</span> is the source of nervous
+complaints, and a whole host of
+cares. This devil might say that his
+name was legion.</p>
+
+<p class="center">2.</p>
+<p>It should be one of the employments
+of women of fortune, to visit hospitals,
+and superintend the conduct of inferiors.</p>
+
+<p class="center">3.</p>
+<p>It is generally supposed, that the
+imagination of women is particularly<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-180" id="DPg_4-180"></a>[<a href="images/v4-180.png">180</a>]</span>
+active, and leads them astray. Why
+then do we seek by education only to
+exercise their imagination and feeling,
+till the understanding, grown rigid by
+disuse, is unable to exercise itself&mdash;and
+the superfluous nourishment the
+imagination and feeling have received,
+renders the former romantic, and the
+latter weak?</p>
+
+<p class="center">4.</p>
+<p>Few men have risen to any great
+eminence in learning, who have not
+received something like a regular education.
+Why are women expected to
+surmount difficulties that men are not
+equal to?</p>
+
+<p class="center">5.</p>
+<p>Nothing can be more absurd than
+the ridicule of the critic, that the heroine
+of his mock-tragedy was in love
+with the very man whom she ought<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-181" id="DPg_4-181"></a>[<a href="images/v4-181.png">181</a>]</span>
+least to have loved; he could not have
+given a better reason. How can passion
+gain strength any other way? In Otaheite,
+love cannot be known, where
+the obstacles to irritate an indiscriminate
+appetite, and sublimate the simple
+sensations of desire till they mount to
+passion, are never known. There a
+man or woman cannot love the very
+person they ought not to have loved&mdash;nor
+does jealousy ever fan the flame.</p>
+
+<p class="center">6.</p>
+<p>It has frequently been observed, that,
+when women have an object in view,
+they pursue it with more steadiness than
+men, particularly love. This is not
+a compliment. Passion pursues with
+more heat than reason, and with most
+ardour during the absence of reason.</p>
+
+<p class="center">7.</p>
+<p>Men are more subject to the physical<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-182" id="DPg_4-182"></a>[<a href="images/v4-182.png">182</a>]</span>
+love than women. The confined education
+of women makes them more
+subject to jealousy.</p>
+
+<p class="center">8.</p>
+<p>Simplicity seems, in general, the consequence
+of ignorance, as I have observed
+in the characters of women and
+sailors&mdash;the being confined to one track
+of impressions.</p>
+
+<p class="center">9.</p>
+<p>I know of no other way of preserving
+the chastity of mankind, than that
+of rendering women rather objects of
+love than desire. The difference is
+great. Yet, while women are encouraged
+to ornament their persons at the
+expence of their minds, while indolence
+renders them helpless and lascivious
+(for what other name can be
+given to the common intercourse between
+the sexes?) they will be, gene<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-183" id="DPg_4-183"></a>[<a href="images/v4-183.png">183</a>]</span>rally
+speaking, only objects of desire;
+and, to such women, men cannot be
+constant. Men, accustomed only to
+have their senses moved, merely seek
+for a selfish gratification in the society
+of women, and their sexual instinct,
+being neither supported by the understanding
+nor the heart, must be excited
+by variety.</p>
+
+<p class="center">10.</p>
+<p>We ought to respect old opinions;
+though prejudices, blindly adopted,
+lead to error, and preclude all exercise
+of the reason.</p>
+
+<p>The emulation which often makes a
+boy mischievous, is a generous spur;
+and the old remark, that unlucky, turbulent
+boys, make the wisest and best
+men, is true, spite of Mr. Knox's arguments.
+It has been observed, that the
+most adventurous horses, when tamed<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-184" id="DPg_4-184"></a>[<a href="images/v4-184.png">184</a>]</span>
+or domesticated, are the most mild and
+tractable.</p>
+
+<p class="center">11.</p>
+<p>The children who start up suddenly
+at twelve or fourteen, and fall into decays,
+in consequence, as it is termed,
+of outgrowing their strength, are in
+general, I believe, those children, who
+have been bred up with mistaken tenderness,
+and not allowed to sport and
+take exercise in the open air. This is
+analogous to plants: for it is found that
+they run up sickly, long stalks, when
+confined.</p>
+
+<p class="center">12.</p>
+<p>Children should be taught to feel deference,
+not to practise submission.</p>
+
+<p class="center">13.</p>
+<p>It is always a proof of false refinement,
+when a fastidious taste overpowers
+sympathy.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-185" id="DPg_4-185"></a>[<a href="images/v4-185.png">185</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">14.</p>
+<p>Lust appears to be the most natural
+companion of wild ambition; and love
+of human praise, of that dominion
+erected by cunning.</p>
+
+<p class="center">15.</p>
+<p>"Genius decays as judgment increases."
+Of course, those who have
+the least genius, have the earliest appearance
+of wisdom.</p>
+
+<p class="center">16.</p>
+<p>A knowledge of the fine arts, is seldom
+subservient to the promotion of
+either religion or virtue. Elegance is
+often indecency; witness our prints.</p>
+
+<p class="center">17.</p>
+<p>There does not appear to be any evil
+in the world, but what is necessary.
+The doctrine of rewards and punishments,
+not considered as a means of re<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-186" id="DPg_4-186"></a>[<a href="images/v4-186.png">186</a>]</span>formation,
+appears to me an infamous
+libel on divine goodness.</p>
+
+<p class="center">18.</p>
+<p>Whether virtue is founded on reason
+or revelation, virtue is wisdom, and
+vice is folly. Why are positive punishments?</p>
+
+<p class="center">19.</p>
+<p>Few can walk alone. The staff of
+Christianity is the necessary support of
+human weakness. But an acquaintance
+with the nature of man and virtue,
+with just sentiments on the attributes,
+would be sufficient, without a voice
+from heaven, to lead some to virtue,
+but not the mob.</p>
+
+<p class="center">20.</p>
+<p>I only expect the natural reward of
+virtue, whatever it may be. I rely not
+on a positive reward.</p>
+
+<p>The justice of God can be vindicated<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-187" id="DPg_4-187"></a>[<a href="images/v4-187.png">187</a>]</span>
+by a belief in a future state&mdash;but a continuation
+of being vindicates it as
+clearly, as the positive system of rewards
+and punishments&mdash;by evil educing
+good for the individual, and not
+for an imaginary whole. The happiness
+of the whole must arise from the
+happiness of the constituent parts, or
+this world is not a state of trial, but a
+school.</p>
+
+<p class="center">21.</p>
+<p>The vices acquired by Augustus to
+retain his power, must have tainted his
+soul, and prevented that increase of
+happiness a good man expects in the
+next stage of existence. This was a
+natural punishment.</p>
+
+<p class="center">22.</p>
+<p>The lover is ever most deeply enamoured,
+when it is with he knows
+not what&mdash;and the devotion of a mystic<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-188" id="DPg_4-188"></a>[<a href="images/v4-188.png">188</a>]</span>
+has a rude Gothic grandeur in it, which
+the respectful adoration of a philosopher
+will never reach. I may be
+thought fanciful; but it has continually
+occurred to me, that, though, I allow,
+reason in this world is the mother
+of wisdom&mdash;yet some flights of the imagination
+seem to reach what wisdom
+cannot teach&mdash;and, while they delude
+us here, afford a glorious hope, if not
+a foretaste, of what we may expect
+hereafter. He that created us, did not
+mean to mark us with ideal images of
+grandeur, the <i>baseless fabric of a vision</i>&mdash;No&mdash;that
+perfection we follow with
+hopeless ardour when the whisperings
+of reason are heard, may be found,
+when not incompatible with our state,
+in the round of eternity. Perfection
+indeed must, even then, be a comparative
+idea&mdash;but the wisdom, the hap<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-189" id="DPg_4-189"></a>[<a href="images/v4-189.png">189</a>]</span>piness
+of a superior state, has been supposed
+to be intuitive, and the happiest
+effusions of human genius have seemed
+like inspiration&mdash;the deductions of reason
+destroy sublimity.</p>
+
+<p class="center">23.</p>
+<p>I am more and more convinced, that
+poetry is the first effervescence of the
+imagination, and the forerunner of civilization.</p>
+
+<p class="center">24.</p>
+<p>When the Arabs had no trace of literature
+or science, they composed
+beautiful verses on the subjects of love
+and war. The flights of the imagination,
+and the laboured deductions of
+reason, appear almost incompatible.</p>
+
+<p class="center">25.</p>
+<p>Poetry certainly flourishes most in
+the first rude state of society. The
+passions speak most eloquently, when
+they are not shackled by reason. The<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-190" id="DPg_4-190"></a>[<a href="images/v4-190.png">190</a>]</span>
+sublime expression, which has been so
+often quoted, [Genesis, ch. 1, ver. 3.]
+is perhaps a barbarous flight; or rather
+the grand conception of an uncultivated
+mind; for it is contrary to nature
+and experience, to suppose that this
+account is founded on facts&mdash;It is
+doubtless a sublime allegory. But a
+cultivated mind would not thus have
+described the creation&mdash;for, arguing
+from analogy, it appears that creation
+must have been a comprehensive plan,
+and that the Supreme Being always
+uses second causes, slowly and silently
+to fulfil his purpose. This is, in reality,
+a more sublime view of that power
+which wisdom supports: but it is not
+the sublimity that would strike the impassioned
+mind, in which the imagination
+took place of intellect. Tell a
+being, whose affections and passions
+have been more exercised than his rea<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-191" id="DPg_4-191"></a>[<a href="images/v4-191.png">191</a>]</span>son,
+that God said, <i>Let there be light!
+and there was light</i>; and he would prostrate
+himself before the Being who
+could thus call things out of nothing,
+as if they were: but a man in whom
+reason had taken place of passion,
+would not adore, till wisdom was conspicuous
+as well as power, for his admiration
+must be founded on principle.</p>
+
+<p class="center">26.</p>
+<p>Individuality is ever conspicuous in
+those enthusiastic flights of fancy, in
+which reason is left behind, without
+being lost sight of.</p>
+
+<p class="center">27.</p>
+<p>The mind has been too often brought
+to the test of enquiries which only
+reach to matter&mdash;put into the crucible,
+though the magnetic and electric fluid
+escapes from the experimental philosopher.</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-192" id="DPg_4-192"></a>[<a href="images/v4-192.png">192</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">28.</p>
+<p>Mr. Kant has observed, that the understanding
+is sublime, the imagination
+beautiful&mdash;yet it is evident, that poets,
+and men who undoubtedly possess the
+liveliest imagination, are most touched
+by the sublime, while men who have
+cold, enquiring minds, have not this
+exquisite feeling in any great degree,
+and indeed seem to lose it as they cultivate
+their reason.</p>
+
+<p class="center">29.</p>
+<p>The Grecian buildings are graceful&mdash;they
+fill the mind with all those pleasing
+emotions, which elegance and beauty
+never fail to excite in a cultivated
+mind&mdash;utility and grace strike us in
+unison&mdash;the mind is satisfied&mdash;things
+appear just what they ought to be: a
+calm satisfaction is felt, but the imagination
+has nothing to do&mdash;no obscurity<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-193" id="DPg_4-193"></a>[<a href="images/v4-193.png">193</a>]</span>
+darkens the gloom&mdash;like reasonable
+content, we can say why we are pleased&mdash;and
+this kind of pleasure may be
+lasting, but it is never great.</p>
+
+<p class="center">30.</p>
+<p>When we say that a person is an
+original, it is only to say in other words
+that he thinks. "The less a man has
+cultivated his rational faculties, the
+more powerful is the principle of
+imitation, over his actions, and his
+habits of thinking. Most women,
+of course, are more influenced by
+the behaviour, the fashions, and the
+opinions of those with whom they
+associate, than men." (Smellie.)</p>
+
+<p>When we read a book which supports
+our favourite opinions, how eagerly
+do we suck in the doctrines, and
+suffer our minds placidly to reflect the
+images which illustrate the tenets we<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-194" id="DPg_4-194"></a>[<a href="images/v4-194.png">194</a>]</span>
+have embraced? We indolently or
+quietly acquiesce in the conclusion, and
+our spirit animates and connects the
+various subjects. But, on the contrary,
+when we peruse a skilful writer,
+who does not coincide in opinion with
+us, how is the mind on the watch to
+detect fallacy? And this coolness often
+prevents our being carried away by a
+stream of eloquence, which the prejudiced
+mind terms declamation&mdash;a pomp
+of words.&mdash;We never allow ourselves to
+be warmed; and, after contending
+with the writer, are more confirmed
+in our own opinion, as much perhaps
+from a spirit of contradiction as from
+reason.&mdash;Such is the strength of man!</p>
+
+<p class="center">31.</p>
+<p>It is the individual manner of seeing
+and feeling, pourtrayed by a strong
+imagination in bold images that have<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-195" id="DPg_4-195"></a>[<a href="images/v4-195.png">195</a>]</span>
+struck the senses, which creates all the
+charms of poetry. A great reader is
+always quoting the description of another's
+emotions; a strong imagination
+delights to paint its own. A writer of
+genius makes us feel; an inferior author
+reason.</p>
+
+<p class="center">32.</p>
+<p>Some principle prior to self-love must
+have existed: the feeling which produced
+the pleasure, must have existed
+before the experience.</p>
+
+
+<h4>THE END.</h4>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-i_S" id="DPg_4-i_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-i.png">i</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-ii_S" id="DPg_4-ii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-ii.png">ii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1><a name="V4S" id="V4S"></a>POSTHUMOUS WORKS</h1>
+<h3>OF THE</h3>
+
+<h1>AUTHOR</h1>
+
+<h3>OF A</h3>
+
+<h2>VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN FOUR VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. IV.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h4><i>LONDON:</i></h4>
+
+<h5>PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S<br />
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,<br />
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.<br />
+                   1798.</h5>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-iii_S" id="DPg_4-iii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-iii.png">iii</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-iv_S" id="DPg_4-iv_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-iv.png">iv</a>]</span></p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>LETTERS</h1>
+<h3>AND</h3>
+<h1>MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.</h1>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>IN TWO VOLUMES.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h1>VOL. II.</h1>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-v_S" id="DPg_4-v_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-v.png">v</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-vi_S" id="DPg_4-vi_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-vi.png">vi</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="DV4_ERRATA_S" id="DV4_ERRATA_S"></a>ERRATA.</h2>
+
+<div class="blockquot"><p>Page 10, line 8, <i>for</i> I write you, <i>read</i> I write to you.</p>
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; 20, &mdash; 9, <i>read</i> bring them to &mdash;&mdash;.</p>
+<p>&mdash;&mdash; 146, &mdash; 2 from the bottom, after over, in&#383;ert a comma.</p></div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-vii_S" id="DPg_4-vii_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-vii.png">vii</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="DV4_CONTENTS_S" id="DV4_CONTENTS_S"></a>CONTENTS.</h2>
+
+<div class='centered'>
+<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary="Vol IV Contents">
+<tr><td align='left'>&nbsp;</td><td align='right'>Page</td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Letters</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-1_S">1</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Letter on the Pre&#383;ent Character of the French Nation</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-39_S">39</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Fragment of Letters on the Management of Infants</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-55_S">55</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Letters to Mr. John&#383;on</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-61_S">61</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Extract of the Cave of Fancy, a Tale</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-99_S">99</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>On Poetry and our Reli&#383;h for the Beauties of Nature</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-159_S">159</a></td></tr>
+<tr><td align='left'>Hints</td><td align='right'><a href="#DPg_4-179_S">179</a></td></tr>
+</table></div>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-1_S" id="DPg_4-1_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-1.png">1</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2><a name="DV4_LETTERS_S" id="DV4_LETTERS_S"></a>LETTERS.</h2>
+
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXVII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">September 27.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> you receive this, I &#383;hall either
+have landed, or be hovering on
+the Briti&#383;h coa&#383;t&mdash;your letter of the 18th
+decided me.</p>
+
+<p>By what criterion of principle or affection,
+you term my que&#383;tions extraordinary
+and unnece&#383;&#383;ary, I cannot determine.&mdash;You
+de&#383;ire me to decide&mdash;I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-2_S" id="DPg_4-2_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-2.png">2</a>]</span>
+had decided. You mu&#383;t have had long
+ago two letters of mine, from &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;,
+to the &#383;ame purport, to con&#383;ider.&mdash;In
+the&#383;e, God knows! there was but too
+much affection, and the agonies of a
+di&#383;tracted mind were but too faithfully
+pourtrayed!&mdash;What more then had
+I to &#383;ay?&mdash;The negative was to come
+from you.&mdash;You had perpetually recurred
+to your promi&#383;e of meeting me
+in the autumn&mdash;Was it extraordinary
+that I &#383;hould demand a yes, or no?&mdash;Your
+letter is written with extreme
+har&#383;hne&#383;s, coldne&#383;s I am accu&#383;tomed
+to, in it I find not a trace of the tenderne&#383;s
+of humanity, much le&#383;s of friend&#383;hip.&mdash;I
+only &#383;ee a de&#383;ire to heave a
+load off your &#383;houlders.</p>
+
+<p>I am above di&#383;puting about words.&mdash;It
+matters not in what terms you decide.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-3_S" id="DPg_4-3_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-3.png">3</a>]</span>
+The tremendous power who formed
+this heart, mu&#383;t have fore&#383;een that, in
+a world in which &#383;elf-intere&#383;t, in various
+&#383;hapes, is the principal mobile, I
+had little chance of e&#383;caping mi&#383;ery.&mdash;To
+the fiat of fate I &#383;ubmit.&mdash;I am content
+to be wretched; but I will not be
+contemptible.&mdash;Of me you have no
+cau&#383;e to complain, but for having had
+too much regard for you&mdash;for having
+expected a degree of permanent happine&#383;s,
+when you only &#383;ought for a
+momentary gratification.</p>
+
+<p>I am &#383;trangely deficient in &#383;agacity.&mdash;Uniting
+my&#383;elf to you, your tenderne&#383;s
+&#383;eemed to make me amends for all my
+former mi&#383;fortunes.&mdash;On this tenderne&#383;s
+and affection with what confidence
+did I re&#383;t!&mdash;but I leaned on a &#383;pear, that
+has pierced me to the heart.&mdash;You
+have thrown off a faithful friend, to<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-4_S" id="DPg_4-4_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-4.png">4</a>]</span>
+pur&#383;ue the caprices of the moment.&mdash;We
+certainly are differently organized;
+for even now, when conviction has
+been &#383;tamped on my &#383;oul by &#383;orrow, I
+can &#383;carcely believe it po&#383;&#383;ible. It depends
+at pre&#383;ent on you, whether you
+will &#383;ee me or not.&mdash;I &#383;hall take no
+&#383;tep, till I &#383;ee or hear from you.</p>
+
+<p>Preparing my&#383;elf for the wor&#383;t&mdash;I
+have determined, if your next letter be
+like the la&#383;t, to write to Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+to procure me an ob&#383;cure lodging, and
+not to inform any body of my arrival.&mdash;There
+I will endeavour in a few months
+to obtain the &#383;um nece&#383;&#383;ary to take me
+to France&mdash;from you I will not receive
+any more.&mdash;I am not yet &#383;ufficiently
+humbled to depend on your beneficence.</p>
+
+<p>Some people, whom my unhappine&#383;s
+has intere&#383;ted, though they know<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-5_S" id="DPg_4-5_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-5.png">5</a>]</span>
+not the extent of it, will a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t me to
+attain the object I have in view, the
+independence of my child. Should a
+peace take place, ready money will go
+a great way in France&mdash;and I will borrow
+a &#383;um, which my indu&#383;try <i>&#383;hall</i>
+enable me to pay at my lei&#383;ure, to purcha&#383;e
+a &#383;mall e&#383;tate for my girl.&mdash;The
+a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance I &#383;hall find nece&#383;&#383;ary to complete
+her education, I can get at an
+ea&#383;y rate at Paris&mdash;I can introduce her
+to &#383;uch &#383;ociety as &#383;he will like&mdash;and
+thus, &#383;ecuring for her all the chance
+for happine&#383;s, which depends on me, I
+&#383;hall die in peace, per&#383;uaded that the
+felicity which has hitherto cheated
+my expectation, will not always elude
+my gra&#383;p. No poor tempe&#383;t-to&#383;&#383;ed
+mariner ever more earne&#383;tly longed to
+arrive at his port.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-6_S" id="DPg_4-6_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-6.png">6</a>]</span></p>
+<p>I &#383;hall not come up in the ve&#383;&#383;el all
+the way, becau&#383;e I have no place to go
+to. Captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; will inform you
+where I am. It is needle&#383;s to add, that
+I am not in a &#383;tate of mind to bear &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e&mdash;and
+that I wi&#383;h to &#383;ee you,
+though it be for the la&#383;t time.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXVIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday, October 4.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I wrote</span> to you by the packet, to
+inform you, that your letter of the 18th
+of la&#383;t month, had determined me to
+&#383;et out with captain &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;; but, as
+we &#383;ailed very quick, I take it for
+granted, that you have not yet received
+it.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-7_S" id="DPg_4-7_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-7.png">7</a>]</span>
+You &#383;ay, I mu&#383;t decide for my&#383;elf.&mdash;I
+had decided, that it was mo&#383;t for the
+intere&#383;t of my little girl, and for my
+own comfort, little as I expect, for us
+to live together; and I even thought
+that you would be glad, &#383;ome years
+hence, when the tumult of bu&#383;ine&#383;s was
+over, to repo&#383;e in the &#383;ociety of an affectionate
+friend, and mark the progre&#383;s
+of our intere&#383;ting child, whil&#383;t endeavouring
+to be of u&#383;e in the circle you
+at la&#383;t re&#383;olved to re&#383;t in; for you cannot
+run about for ever.</p>
+
+<p>From the tenour of your la&#383;t letter
+however, I am led to imagine, that you
+have formed &#383;ome new attachment.&mdash;If
+it be &#383;o, let me earne&#383;tly reque&#383;t you
+to &#383;ee me once more, and immediately.
+This is the only proof I require of the
+friend&#383;hip you profe&#383;s for me. I will<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-8_S" id="DPg_4-8_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-8.png">8</a>]</span>
+then decide, &#383;ince you boggle about a
+mere form.</p>
+
+<p>I am labouring to write with calmne&#383;s&mdash;but
+the extreme angui&#383;h I feel,
+at landing without having any friend
+to receive me, and even to be con&#383;cious
+that the friend whom I mo&#383;t wi&#383;h
+to &#383;ee, will feel a di&#383;agreeable &#383;en&#383;ation
+at being informed of my arrival, does
+not come under the de&#383;cription of common
+mi&#383;ery. Every emotion yields to
+an overwhelming flood of &#383;orrow&mdash;and
+the playfulne&#383;s of my child di&#383;tre&#383;&#383;es
+me.&mdash;On her account, I wi&#383;hed
+to remain a few days here, comfortle&#383;s
+as is my &#383;ituation.&mdash;Be&#383;ides, I did not
+wi&#383;h to &#383;urpri&#383;e you. You have told
+me, that you would make any &#383;acrifice
+to promote my happine&#383;s&mdash;and, even in
+your la&#383;t unkind letter, you talk of the
+ties which bind you to me and my<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-9_S" id="DPg_4-9_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-9.png">9</a>]</span>
+child.&mdash;Tell me, that you wi&#383;h it, and
+I will cut this Gordian knot.</p>
+
+<p>I now mo&#383;t earne&#383;tly intreat you to
+write to me, without fail, by the return
+of the po&#383;t. Direct your letter to
+be left at the po&#383;t-office, and tell me
+whether you will come to me here, or
+where you will meet me. I can receive
+your letter on Wedne&#383;day morning.</p>
+
+<p>Do not keep me in &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e.&mdash;I expect
+nothing from you, or any human
+being: my die is ca&#383;t!&mdash;I have fortitude
+enough to determine to do my
+duty; yet I cannot rai&#383;e my depre&#383;&#383;ed
+&#383;pirits, or calm my trembling heart.&mdash;That
+being who moulded it thus,
+knows that I am unable to tear up by
+the roots the propen&#383;ity to affection
+which has been the torment of my life&mdash;but
+life will have an end!</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-10_S" id="DPg_4-10_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-10.png">10</a>]</span>
+Should you come here (a few months
+ago I could not have doubted it) you
+will find me at &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. If you prefer
+meeting me on the road, tell me where.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours affectionately &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXIX</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I write</span> you now on my knees; imploring
+you to &#383;end my child and the
+maid with &mdash;&mdash;, to Paris, to be con&#383;igned
+to the care of Madame &mdash;&mdash;, rue
+&mdash;&mdash;, &#383;ection de &mdash;&mdash;. Should they be
+removed, &mdash;&mdash; can give their direction.</p>
+
+<p>Let the maid have all my clothes,
+without di&#383;tinction.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-11_S" id="DPg_4-11_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-11.png">11</a>]</span>
+Pray pay the cook her wages, and do
+not mention the confe&#383;&#383;ion which I
+forced from her&mdash;a little &#383;ooner or later
+is of no con&#383;equence. Nothing but
+my extreme &#383;tupidity could have rendered
+me blind &#383;o long. Yet, whil&#383;t
+you a&#383;&#383;ured me that you had no attachment,
+I thought we might &#383;till
+have lived together.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall make no comments on your
+conduct; or any appeal to the world.
+Let my wrongs &#383;leep with me! Soon,
+very &#383;oon &#383;hall I be at peace. When
+you receive this, my burning head will
+be cold.</p>
+
+<p>I would encounter a thou&#383;and deaths,
+rather than a night like the la&#383;t. Your
+treatment has thrown my mind into a
+&#383;tate of chaos; yet I am &#383;erene. I go
+to find comfort, and my only fear is,
+that my poor body will be in&#383;ulted by<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-12_S" id="DPg_4-12_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-12.png">12</a>]</span>
+an endeavour to recal my hated exi&#383;tence.
+But I &#383;hall plunge into the
+Thames where there is the lea&#383;t chance
+of my being &#383;natched from the death I
+&#383;eek.</p>
+
+<p>God ble&#383;s you! May you never know
+by experience what you have made me
+endure. Should your &#383;en&#383;ibility ever
+awake, remor&#383;e will find its way to your
+heart; and, in the mid&#383;t of bu&#383;ine&#383;s and
+&#383;en&#383;ual plea&#383;ure, I &#383;hall appear before
+you, the victim of your deviation from
+rectitude.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-13_S" id="DPg_4-13_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-13.png">13</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Sunday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> only to lament, that, when
+the bitterne&#383;s of death was pa&#383;t, I was
+inhumanly brought back to life and
+mi&#383;ery. But a fixed determination is
+not to be baffled by di&#383;appointment;
+nor will I allow that to be a frantic attempt,
+which was one of the calme&#383;t
+acts of rea&#383;on. In this re&#383;pect, I am
+only accountable to my&#383;elf. Did I
+care for what is termed reputation, it
+is by other circum&#383;tances that I &#383;hould
+be di&#383;honoured.</p>
+
+<p>You &#383;ay, "that you know not how to
+extricate our&#383;elves out of the wretchedne&#383;s
+into which we have been plunged."<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-14_S" id="DPg_4-14_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-14.png">14</a>]</span>
+You are extricated long &#383;ince.&mdash;But I
+forbear to comment.&mdash;&mdash;If I am condemned
+to live longer, it is a living
+death.</p>
+
+<p>It appears to me, that you lay much
+more &#383;tre&#383;s on delicacy, than on principle;
+for I am unable to di&#383;cover what
+&#383;entiment of delicacy would have been
+violated, by your vi&#383;iting a wretched
+friend&mdash;if indeed you have any friend&#383;hip
+for me.&mdash;But &#383;ince your new attachment
+is the only thing &#383;acred in
+your eyes, I am &#383;ilent&mdash;Be happy! My
+complaints &#383;hall never more damp your
+enjoyment&mdash;perhaps I am mi&#383;taken in
+&#383;uppo&#383;ing that even my death could, for
+more than a moment.&mdash;This is what
+you call magnanimity&mdash;It is happy for
+your&#383;elf, that you po&#383;&#383;e&#383;s this quality in
+the highe&#383;t degree.</p>
+
+<p>Your continually a&#383;&#383;erting, that you<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-15_S" id="DPg_4-15_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-15.png">15</a>]</span>
+will do all in your power to contribute
+to my comfort (when you only allude
+to pecuniary a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance), appears to me
+a flagrant breach of delicacy.&mdash;I want
+not &#383;uch vulgar comfort, nor will I
+accept it. I never wanted but your
+heart&mdash;That gone, you have nothing
+more to give. Had I only poverty to
+fear, I &#383;hould not &#383;hrink from life.&mdash;Forgive
+me then, if I &#383;ay, that I &#383;hall
+con&#383;ider any direct or indirect attempt
+to &#383;upply my nece&#383;&#383;ities, as an in&#383;ult
+which I have not merited&mdash;and as
+rather done out of tenderne&#383;s for your
+own reputation, than for me. Do not
+mi&#383;take me; I do not think that you
+value money (therefore I will not accept
+what you do not care for)
+though I do much le&#383;s, becau&#383;e certain
+privations are not painful to me.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-16_S" id="DPg_4-16_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-16.png">16</a>]</span>
+When I am dead, re&#383;pect for your&#383;elf
+will make you take care of the child.</p>
+
+<p>I write with difficulty&mdash;probably I
+&#383;hall never write to you again.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<p>God ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> compelled at la&#383;t to &#383;ay that
+you treat me ungenerou&#383;ly. I agree
+with you, that</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-17_S" id="DPg_4-17_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-17.png">17</a>]</span></p>
+<p>But let the obliquity now fall on me.&mdash;I
+fear neither poverty nor infamy. I am
+unequal to the ta&#383;k of writing&mdash;and
+explanations are not nece&#383;&#383;ary.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<p>My child may have to blu&#383;h for her
+mother's want of prudence&mdash;and may
+lament that the rectitude of my heart
+made me above vulgar precautions;
+but &#383;he &#383;hall not de&#383;pi&#383;e me for meanne&#383;s.&mdash;You
+are now perfectly free.&mdash;God
+ble&#383;s you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-18_S" id="DPg_4-18_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-18.png">18</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXXIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I have</span> been hurt by indirect enquiries,
+which appear to me not to be
+dictated by any tenderne&#383;s to me.&mdash;You
+a&#383;k "If I am well or tranquil?"&mdash;They
+who think me &#383;o, mu&#383;t want a heart to
+e&#383;timate my feelings by.&mdash;I chu&#383;e
+then to be the organ of my own &#383;entiments.</p>
+
+<p>I mu&#383;t tell you, that I am very much
+mortified by your continually offering
+me pecuniary a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance&mdash;and, con&#383;idering
+your going to the new hou&#383;e, as an
+open avowal that you abandon me, let<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-19_S" id="DPg_4-19_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-19.png">19</a>]</span>
+me tell you that I will &#383;ooner peri&#383;h
+than receive any thing from you&mdash;and
+I &#383;ay this at the moment when I am
+di&#383;appointed in my fir&#383;t attempt to obtain
+a temporary &#383;upply. But this
+even plea&#383;es me; an accumulation of
+di&#383;appointments and mi&#383;fortunes &#383;eems
+to &#383;uit the habit of my mind.&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>Have but a little patience, and I will
+remove my&#383;elf where it will not be
+nece&#383;&#383;ary for you to talk&mdash;of cour&#383;e,
+not to think of me. But let me &#383;ee,
+written by your&#383;elf&mdash;for I will not receive
+it through any other medium&mdash;that
+the affair is fini&#383;hed.&mdash;It is an in&#383;ult
+to me to &#383;uppo&#383;e, that I can be reconciled,
+or recover my &#383;pirits; but,
+if you hear nothing of me, it will be
+the &#383;ame thing to you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-20_S" id="DPg_4-20_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-20.png">20</a>]</span></p>
+<p>Even your &#383;eeing me, has been to
+oblige other people, and not to &#383;ooth
+my di&#383;tracted mind.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXIV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Thur&#383;day Afternoon.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Mr.</span> &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; having forgot to de&#383;ire
+you to &#383;end the things of mine which
+were left at the hou&#383;e, I have to reque&#383;t
+you to let &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; bring them onto
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;.</p>
+
+<p>I &#383;hall go this evening to the lodging;
+&#383;o you need not be re&#383;trained from
+coming here to tran&#383;act your bu&#383;ine&#383;s.&mdash;And,
+whatever I may think, and feel<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-21_S" id="DPg_4-21_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-21.png">21</a>]</span>&mdash;you
+need not fear that I &#383;hall publicly
+complain&mdash;No! If I have any criterion
+to judge of right and wrong, I have
+been mo&#383;t ungenerou&#383;ly treated: but,
+wi&#383;hing now only to hide my&#383;elf, I &#383;hall
+be &#383;ilent as the grave in which I long
+to forget my&#383;elf. I &#383;hall protect and
+provide for my child.&mdash;I only mean by
+this to &#383;ay, that you having nothing
+to fear from my de&#383;peration.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Farewel. &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-22_S" id="DPg_4-22_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-22.png">22</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER LXXV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">London, November 27.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">The</span> letter, without an addre&#383;s,
+which you put up with the letters you
+returned, did not meet my eyes till
+ju&#383;t now.&mdash;I had thrown the letters
+a&#383;ide&mdash;I did not wi&#383;h to look over a
+regi&#383;ter of &#383;orrow.</p>
+
+<p>My not having &#383;een it, will account
+for my having written to you with
+anger&mdash;under the impre&#383;&#383;ion your departure,
+without even a line left for me,
+made on me, even after your late conduct,
+which could not lead me to expect
+much attention to my &#383;ufferings.</p>
+
+<p>In fact, "the decided conduct, which<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-23_S" id="DPg_4-23_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-23.png">23</a>]</span>
+appeared to me &#383;o unfeeling," has almo&#383;t
+overturned my rea&#383;on; my mind
+is injured&mdash;I &#383;carcely know where I
+am, or what I do.&mdash;The grief I cannot
+conquer (for &#383;ome cruel recollections
+never quit me, bani&#383;hing almo&#383;t every
+other) I labour to conceal in total
+&#383;olitude.&mdash;My life therefore is but an
+exerci&#383;e of fortitude, continually on
+the &#383;tretch&mdash;and hope never gleams in
+this tomb, where I am buried alive.</p>
+
+<p>But I meant to rea&#383;on with you, and
+not to complain.&mdash;You tell me, "that I
+&#383;hall judge more coolly of your mode
+of acting, &#383;ome time hence." But is it
+not po&#383;&#383;ible that <i>pa&#383;&#383;ion</i> clouds your rea&#383;on,
+as much as it does mine?&mdash;and
+ought you not to doubt, whether tho&#383;e
+principles are &#383;o "exalted," as you
+term them, which only lead to your
+own gratification? In other words,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-24_S" id="DPg_4-24_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-24.png">24</a>]</span>
+whether it be ju&#383;t to have no principle
+of action, but that of following your
+inclination, trampling on the affection
+you have fo&#383;tered, and the expectations
+you have excited?</p>
+
+<p>My affection for you is rooted in my
+heart.&mdash;I know you are not what you
+now &#383;eem&mdash;nor will you always act, or
+feel, as you now do, though I may
+never be comforted by the change.&mdash;Even
+at Paris, my image will haunt
+you.&mdash;You will &#383;ee my pale face&mdash;and
+&#383;ometimes the tears of angui&#383;h will
+drop on your heart, which you have
+forced from mine.</p>
+
+<p>I cannot write. I thought I could
+quickly have refuted all your <i>ingenious</i>
+arguments; but my head is confu&#383;ed.&mdash;Right
+or wrong, I am mi&#383;erable!</p>
+
+<p>It &#383;eems to me, that my conduct has
+always been governed by the &#383;tricte&#383;t
+principles of ju&#383;tice and truth.&mdash;Yet,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-25_S" id="DPg_4-25_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-25.png">25</a>]</span>
+how wretched have my &#383;ocial feelings,
+and delicacy of &#383;entiment rendered me!&mdash;I
+have loved with my whole &#383;oul,
+only to di&#383;cover that I had no chance
+of a return&mdash;and that exi&#383;tence is a
+burthen without it.</p>
+
+<p>I do not perfectly under&#383;tand you.&mdash;If,
+by the offer of your friend&#383;hip, you
+&#383;till only mean pecuniary &#383;upport&mdash;I
+mu&#383;t again reject it.&mdash;Trifling are the
+ills of poverty in the &#383;cale of my mi&#383;fortunes.&mdash;God
+ble&#383;s you!</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<p>I have been treated ungenerou&#383;ly&mdash;if
+I under&#383;tand what is genero&#383;ity.&mdash;&mdash;You
+&#383;eem to me only to have been
+anxious to &#383;hake me off&mdash;regardle&#383;s
+whether you da&#383;hed me to atoms by
+the fall.&mdash;In truth I have been rudely
+handled. <i>Do you judge coolly</i>, and I tru&#383;t<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-26_S" id="DPg_4-26_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-26.png">26</a>]</span>
+you will not continue to call tho&#383;e capricious
+feelings "the mo&#383;t refined,"
+which would undermine not only the
+mo&#383;t &#383;acred principles, but the affections
+which unite mankind.&mdash;&mdash;You
+would render mothers unnatural&mdash;and
+there would be no &#383;uch thing as a father!&mdash;If
+your theory of morals is the
+mo&#383;t "exalted," it is certainly the mo&#383;t
+ea&#383;y.&mdash;It does not require much magnanimity,
+to determine to plea&#383;e our&#383;elves
+for the moment, let others &#383;uffer
+what they will!</p>
+
+<p>Excu&#383;e me for again tormenting you,
+my heart thir&#383;ts for ju&#383;tice from you&mdash;and
+whil&#383;t I recollect that you approved
+Mi&#383;s &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;'s conduct&mdash;I am convinced
+you will not always ju&#383;tify your
+own.</p>
+
+<p>Beware of the deceptions of pa&#383;&#383;ion!
+It will not always bani&#383;h from your<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-27_S" id="DPg_4-27_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-27.png">27</a>]</span>
+mind, that you have acted ignobly&mdash;and
+conde&#383;cended to &#383;ubterfuge to
+glo&#383;s over the conduct you could not
+excu&#383;e.&mdash;Do truth and principle require
+&#383;uch &#383;acrifices?</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">London, December 8.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Having</span> ju&#383;t been informed that
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; is to return immediately to
+Paris, I would not mi&#383;s a &#383;ure opportunity
+of writing, becau&#383;e I am not
+certain that my la&#383;t, by Dover has
+reached you.</p>
+
+<p>Re&#383;entment, and even anger, are
+momentary emotions with me&mdash;and<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-28_S" id="DPg_4-28_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-28.png">28</a>]</span>
+I wi&#383;hed to tell you &#383;o, that if you ever
+think of me, it may not be in the light
+of an enemy.</p>
+
+<p>That I have not been u&#383;ed <i>well</i> I
+mu&#383;t ever feel; perhaps, not always
+with the keen angui&#383;h I do at pre&#383;ent&mdash;for
+I began even now to write calmly,
+and I cannot re&#383;train my tears.</p>
+
+<p>I am &#383;tunned!&mdash;Your late conduct
+&#383;till appears to me a frightful dream.&mdash;Ah!
+a&#383;k your&#383;elf if you have not conde&#383;cended
+to employ a little addre&#383;s, I
+could almo&#383;t &#383;ay cunning, unworthy of
+you?&mdash;Principles are &#383;acred things&mdash;and
+we never play with truth, with
+impunity.</p>
+
+<p>The expectation (I have too fondly
+nouri&#383;hed it) of regaining your affection,
+every day grows fainter and
+fainter.&mdash;Indeed, it &#383;eems to me, when
+I am more &#383;ad than u&#383;ual, that I &#383;hall<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-29_S" id="DPg_4-29_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-29.png">29</a>]</span>
+never &#383;ee you more.&mdash;Yet you will not
+always forget me.&mdash;You will feel &#383;omething
+like remor&#383;e, for having lived only
+for your&#383;elf&mdash;and &#383;acrificed my peace
+to inferior gratifications. In a comfortle&#383;s
+old age, you will remember
+that you had one di&#383;intere&#383;ted friend,
+who&#383;e heart you wounded to the quick.
+The hour of recollection will come&mdash;and
+you will not be &#383;ati&#383;fied to act the
+part of a boy, till you fall into that of a
+dotard. I know that your mind, your
+heart, and your principles of action,
+are all &#383;uperior to your pre&#383;ent conduct.
+You do, you mu&#383;t, re&#383;pect me&mdash;and
+you will be &#383;orry to forfeit my e&#383;teem.</p>
+
+<p>You know be&#383;t whether I am &#383;till
+pre&#383;erving the remembrance of an
+imaginary being.&mdash;I once thought that
+I knew you thoroughly&mdash;but now I
+am obliged to leave &#383;ome doubts that<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-30_S" id="DPg_4-30_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-30.png">30</a>]</span>
+involuntarily pre&#383;s on me, to be cleared
+up by time.</p>
+
+<p>You may render me unhappy; but
+cannot make me contemptible in my
+own eyes.&mdash;I &#383;hall &#383;till be able to &#383;upport
+my child, though I am di&#383;appointed
+in &#383;ome other plans of u&#383;efulne&#383;s,
+which I once believed would have afforded
+you equal plea&#383;ure.</p>
+
+<p>Whil&#383;t I was with you, I re&#383;trained
+my natural genero&#383;ity, becau&#383;e I thought
+your property in jeopardy.&mdash;When I
+went to &mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, I reque&#383;ted you, <i>if you
+could conveniently</i>, not to forget my father,
+&#383;i&#383;ters, and &#383;ome other people,
+whom I was intere&#383;ted about.&mdash;Money
+was lavi&#383;hed away, yet not only my
+reque&#383;ts were neglected, but &#383;ome trifling
+debts were not di&#383;charged, that
+now come on me.&mdash;Was this friend&#383;hip&mdash;or
+genero&#383;ity? Will you not grant<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-31_S" id="DPg_4-31_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-31.png">31</a>]</span>
+you have forgotten your&#383;elf? Still
+I have an affection for you.&mdash;God
+ble&#383;s you.</p>
+
+<p class="right">* * * *</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXVII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> the parting from you for ever is
+the mo&#383;t &#383;erious event of my life, I will
+once expo&#383;tulate with you, and call
+not the language of truth and feeling
+ingenuity!</p>
+
+<p>I know the &#383;oundne&#383;s of your under&#383;tanding&mdash;and
+know that it is impo&#383;&#383;ible
+for you always to confound the
+caprices of every wayward inclination
+with the manly dictates of principle.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-32_S" id="DPg_4-32_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-32.png">32</a>]</span>
+You tell me "that I torment you."&mdash;Why
+do I?&mdash;&mdash;Becau&#383;e you cannot
+e&#383;trange your heart entirely from me&mdash;and
+you feel that ju&#383;tice is on my &#383;ide.
+You urge, "that your conduct was
+unequivocal."&mdash;It was not.&mdash;When
+your coolne&#383;s has hurt me, with what
+tenderne&#383;s have you endeavoured to
+remove the impre&#383;&#383;ion!&mdash;and even before
+I returned to England, you took
+great pains to convince me, that all
+my unea&#383;ine&#383;s was occa&#383;ioned by the
+effect of a worn-out con&#383;titution&mdash;and
+you concluded your letter with the&#383;e
+words, "Bu&#383;ine&#383;s alone has kept me
+from you.&mdash;Come to any port, and I
+will fly down to my two dear girls
+with a heart all their own."</p>
+
+<p>With the&#383;e a&#383;&#383;urances, is it extraordinary
+that I &#383;hould believe what I
+wi&#383;hed? I might&mdash;and did think that<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-33_S" id="DPg_4-33_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-33.png">33</a>]</span>
+you had a &#383;truggle with old propen&#383;ities;
+but I &#383;till thought that I and virtue
+&#383;hould at la&#383;t prevail. I &#383;till thought
+that you had a magnanimity of character,
+which would enable you to conquer
+your&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;, believe me, it is not
+romance, you have acknowledged to
+me feelings of this kind.&mdash;You could
+re&#383;tore me to life and hope, and the
+&#383;ati&#383;faction you would feel, would
+amply repay you.</p>
+
+<p>In tearing my&#383;elf from you, it is my
+own heart I pierce&mdash;and the time will
+come, when you will lament that you
+have thrown away a heart, that, even
+in the moment of pa&#383;&#383;ion, you cannot
+de&#383;pi&#383;e.&mdash;I would owe every thing to
+your genero&#383;ity&mdash;but, for God's &#383;ake,
+keep me no longer in &#383;u&#383;pen&#383;e!&mdash;Let
+me &#383;ee you once more!<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-34_S" id="DPg_4-34_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-34.png">34</a>]</span>&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER LXXVIII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> mu&#383;t do as you plea&#383;e with
+re&#383;pect to the child.&mdash;I could wi&#383;h that
+it might be done &#383;oon, that my name
+may be no more mentioned to you.
+It is now fini&#383;hed.&mdash;Convinced that you
+have neither regard nor friend&#383;hip, I
+di&#383;dain to utter a reproach, though I
+have had rea&#383;on to think, that the
+"forbearance" talked of, has not been
+very delicate.&mdash;It is however of no
+con&#383;equence.&mdash;I am glad you are &#383;ati&#383;fied
+with your own conduct.</p>
+
+<p>I now &#383;olemnly a&#383;&#383;ure you, that this is
+an eternal farewel.&mdash;Yet I flinch not
+from the duties which tie me to life.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-35_S" id="DPg_4-35_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-35.png">35</a>]</span>
+That there is "&#383;ophi&#383;try" on one
+&#383;ide or other, is certain; but now it
+matters not on which. On my part it
+has not been a que&#383;tion of words. Yet
+your under&#383;tanding or mine mu&#383;t be
+&#383;trangely warped&mdash;for what you term
+"delicacy," appears to me to be exactly
+the contrary. I have no criterion
+for morality, and have thought in vain,
+if the &#383;en&#383;ations which lead you to follow
+an ancle or &#383;tep, be the &#383;acred
+foundation of principle and affection.
+Mine has been of a very different nature,
+or it would not have &#383;tood the
+brunt of your &#383;arca&#383;ms.</p>
+
+<p>The &#383;entiment in me is &#383;till &#383;acred.
+If there be any part of me that will
+&#383;urvive the &#383;en&#383;e of my mi&#383;fortunes, it
+is the purity of my affections. The
+impetuo&#383;ity of your &#383;en&#383;es, may have
+led you to term mere animal de&#383;ire, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-36_S" id="DPg_4-36_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-36.png">36</a>]</span>
+&#383;ource of principle; and it may give
+ze&#383;t to &#383;ome years to come.&mdash;Whether
+you will always think &#383;o, I &#383;hall never
+know.</p>
+
+<p>It is &#383;trange that, in &#383;pite of all you
+do, &#383;omething like conviction forces me
+to believe, that you are not what you
+appear to be.</p>
+
+<p>I part with you in peace.</p>
+
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-37_S" id="DPg_4-37_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-37.png">37</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<h2>LETTER</h2>
+<h4>ON THE</h4>
+<h2>PRESENT CHARACTER</h2>
+<h4>OF THE</h4>
+<h2>FRENCH NATION.</h2>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-38_S" id="DPg_4-38_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-38.png">38</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-39_S" id="DPg_4-39_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-39.png">39</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h3><a name="LETTER_S" id="DLETTER_S"></a>LETTER</h3>
+
+<h3><i>Introductory to a Series of Letters on the Pre&#383;ent
+Character of the French Nation.</i></h3>
+<hr class="short" />
+
+<p class="right">Paris, February 15, 1793.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear friend,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is nece&#383;&#383;ary perhaps for an ob&#383;erver
+of mankind, to guard as carefully the
+remembrance of the fir&#383;t impre&#383;&#383;ion
+made by a nation, as by a countenance;
+becau&#383;e we imperceptibly lo&#383;e &#383;ight of
+the national character, when we become
+more intimate with individuals.
+It is not then u&#383;ele&#383;s or pre&#383;umptuous
+to note, that, when I fir&#383;t entered Paris,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-40_S" id="DPg_4-40_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-40.png">40</a>]</span>
+the &#383;triking contra&#383;t of riches and poverty,
+elegance and &#383;lovenline&#383;s, urbanity
+and deceit, every where caught
+my eye, and &#383;addened my &#383;oul; and
+the&#383;e impre&#383;&#383;ions are &#383;till the foundation
+of my remarks on the manners, which
+flatter the &#383;en&#383;es, more than they intere&#383;t
+the heart, and yet excite more intere&#383;t
+than e&#383;teem.</p>
+
+<p>The whole mode of life here tends
+indeed to render the people frivolous,
+and, to borrow their favourite epithet,
+amiable. Ever on the wing, they are
+always &#383;ipping the &#383;parkling joy on the
+brim of the cup, leaving &#383;atiety in the
+bottom for tho&#383;e who venture to drink
+deep. On all &#383;ides they trip along,
+buoyed up by animal &#383;pirits, and &#383;eemingly
+&#383;o void of care, that often, when
+I am walking on the <i>Boulevards</i>, it
+occurs to me, that they alone under&#383;tand<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-41_S" id="DPg_4-41_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-41.png">41</a>]</span>
+the full import of the term lei&#383;ure; and
+they trifle their time away with &#383;uch
+an air of contentment, I know not how
+to wi&#383;h them wi&#383;er at the expence of
+their gaiety. They play before me like
+motes in a &#383;unbeam, enjoying the pa&#383;&#383;ing
+ray; whil&#383;t an Engli&#383;h head, &#383;earching
+for more &#383;olid happine&#383;s, lo&#383;es, in
+the analy&#383;is of plea&#383;ure, the volatile
+&#383;weets of the moment. Their chief
+enjoyment, it is true, ri&#383;es from vanity:
+but it is not the vanity that engenders
+vexation of &#383;pirit; on the contrary, it
+lightens the heavy burthen of life,
+which rea&#383;on too often weighs, merely
+to &#383;hift from one &#383;houlder to the
+other.</p>
+
+<p>Inve&#383;tigating the modification of the
+pa&#383;&#383;ion, as I would analyze the elements
+that give a form to dead matter, I
+&#383;hall attempt to trace to their &#383;ource<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-42_S" id="DPg_4-42_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-42.png">42</a>]</span>
+the cau&#383;es which have combined to
+render this nation the mo&#383;t poli&#383;hed, in
+a phy&#383;ical &#383;en&#383;e, and probably the mo&#383;t
+&#383;uperficial in the world; and I mean to
+follow the windings of the various
+&#383;treams that di&#383;embogue into a terrific
+gulf, in which all the dignity of our
+nature is ab&#383;orbed. For every thing
+has con&#383;pired to make the French the
+mo&#383;t &#383;en&#383;ual people in the world; and
+what can render the heart &#383;o hard, or
+&#383;o effectually &#383;tifle every moral emotion,
+as the refinements of &#383;en&#383;uality?</p>
+
+<p>The frequent repetition of the word
+French, appears invidious; let me then
+make a previous ob&#383;ervation, which I
+beg you not to lo&#383;e &#383;ight of, when I
+&#383;peak rather har&#383;hly of a land flowing
+with milk and honey. Remember that
+it is not the morals of a particular
+people that I would decry; for are we<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-43_S" id="DPg_4-43_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-43.png">43</a>]</span>
+not all of the &#383;ame &#383;tock? But I wi&#383;h
+calmly to con&#383;ider the &#383;tage of civilization
+in which I find the French, and,
+giving a &#383;ketch of their character, and
+unfolding the circum&#383;tances which have
+produced its identity, I &#383;hall endeavour
+to throw &#383;ome light on the hi&#383;tory of
+man, and on the pre&#383;ent important
+&#383;ubjects of di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ion.</p>
+
+<p>I would I could fir&#383;t inform you that,
+out of the chaos of vices and follies,
+prejudices and virtues, rudely jumbled
+together, I &#383;aw the fair form of Liberty
+&#383;lowly ri&#383;ing, and Virtue expanding her
+wings to &#383;helter all her children! I
+&#383;hould then hear the account of the
+barbarities that have rent the bo&#383;om of
+France patiently, and ble&#383;s the firm
+hand that lopt off the rotten limbs.
+But, if the ari&#383;tocracy of birth is levelled
+with the ground, only to make room<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-44_S" id="DPg_4-44_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-44.png">44</a>]</span>
+for that of riches, I am afraid that the
+morals of the people will not be much
+improved by the change, or the government
+rendered le&#383;s venal. Still it
+is not ju&#383;t to dwell on the mi&#383;ery produced
+by the pre&#383;ent &#383;truggle, without
+adverting to the &#383;tanding evils of the
+old &#383;y&#383;tem. I am grieved&mdash;&#383;orely grieved&mdash;when
+I think of the blood that has
+&#383;tained the cau&#383;e of freedom at Paris;
+but I al&#383;o hear the &#383;ame live &#383;tream cry
+aloud from the highways, through
+which the retreating armies pa&#383;&#383;ed
+with famine and death in their rear,
+and I hide my face with awe before
+the in&#383;crutable ways of providence,
+&#383;weeping in &#383;uch various directions the
+be&#383;om of de&#383;truction over the &#383;ons of
+men.</p>
+
+<p>Before I came to France, I cheri&#383;hed,
+you know, an opinion, that &#383;trong vir<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-45_S" id="DPg_4-45_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-45.png">45</a>]</span>tues
+might exi&#383;t with the poli&#383;hed manners
+produced by the progre&#383;s of civilization;
+and I even anticipated the
+epoch, when, in the cour&#383;e of improvement,
+men would labour to become
+virtuous, without being goaded on by
+mi&#383;ery. But now, the per&#383;pective of
+the golden age, fading before the attentive
+eye of ob&#383;ervation, almo&#383;t eludes
+my &#383;ight; and, lo&#383;ing thus in part my
+theory of a more perfect &#383;tate, &#383;tart not,
+my friend, if I bring forward an opinion,
+which at the fir&#383;t glance &#383;eems to
+be levelled again&#383;t the exi&#383;tence of God!
+I am not become an Athei&#383;t, I a&#383;&#383;ure
+you, by re&#383;iding at Paris: yet I begin
+to fear that vice, or, if you will, evil,
+is the grand mobile of action, and that,
+when the pa&#383;&#383;ions are ju&#383;tly poized, we
+become harmle&#383;s, and in the &#383;ame proportion
+u&#383;ele&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-46_S" id="DPg_4-46_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-46.png">46</a>]</span>
+The wants of rea&#383;on are very few;
+and, were we to con&#383;ider di&#383;pa&#383;&#383;ionately
+the real value of mo&#383;t things, we &#383;hould
+probably re&#383;t &#383;ati&#383;fied with the &#383;imple
+gratification of our phy&#383;ical nece&#383;&#383;ities,
+and be content with negative goodne&#383;s:
+for it is frequently, only that wanton,
+the Imagination, with her artful
+coquetry, who lures us forward, and
+makes us run over a rough road, pu&#383;hing
+a&#383;ide every ob&#383;tacle merely to catch
+a di&#383;appointment.</p>
+
+<p>The de&#383;ire al&#383;o of being u&#383;eful to
+others, is continually damped by experience;
+and, if the exertions of humanity
+were not in &#383;ome mea&#383;ure their
+own reward, who would endure mi&#383;ery,
+or &#383;truggle with care, to make
+&#383;ome people ungrateful, and others
+idle?</p>
+
+<p>You will call the&#383;e melancholy effu<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-47_S" id="DPg_4-47_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-47.png">47</a>]</span>&#383;ions,
+and gue&#383;s that, fatigued by the
+vivacity, which has all the bu&#383;tling
+folly of childhood, without the innocence
+which renders ignorance charming,
+I am too &#383;evere in my &#383;trictures.
+It may be &#383;o; and I am aware that the
+good effects of the revolution will be
+la&#383;t felt at Paris; where &#383;urely the &#383;oul
+of Epicurus has long been at work to
+root out the &#383;imple emotions of the
+heart, which, being natural, are always
+moral. Rendered cold and artificial
+by the &#383;elfi&#383;h enjoyments of the &#383;en&#383;es,
+which the government fo&#383;tered, is it
+&#383;urpri&#383;ing that &#383;implicity of manners,
+and &#383;inglene&#383;s of heart, rarely appear,
+to recreate me with the wild odour of
+nature, &#383;o pa&#383;&#383;ing &#383;weet?</p>
+
+<p>Seeing how deep the fibres of mi&#383;chief
+have &#383;hot, I &#383;ometimes a&#383;k, with a
+doubting accent, Whether a nation can<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-48_S" id="DPg_4-48_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-48.png">48</a>]</span>
+go back to the purity of manners which
+has hitherto been maintained un&#383;ullied
+only by the keen air of poverty, when,
+ema&#383;culated by plea&#383;ure, the luxuries
+of pro&#383;perity are become the wants of
+nature? I cannot yet give up the hope,
+that a fairer day is dawning on Europe,
+though I mu&#383;t he&#383;itatingly ob&#383;erve, that
+little is to be expected from the narrow
+principle of commerce which &#383;eems
+every where to be &#383;hoving a&#383;ide <i>the point
+of honour</i> of the <i>noble&#383;&#383;e</i>. I can look beyond
+the evils of the moment, and do
+not expect muddied water to become
+clear before it has had time to &#383;tand;
+yet, even for the moment, it is the
+mo&#383;t terrific of all &#383;ights, to &#383;ee men
+vicious without warmth&mdash;to &#383;ee the
+order that &#383;hould be the &#383;uper&#383;cription
+of virtue, cultivated to give &#383;ecurity to
+crimes which only thoughtle&#383;&#383;ne&#383;s could<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-49_S" id="DPg_4-49_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-49.png">49</a>]</span>
+palliate. Di&#383;order is, in fact, the very
+e&#383;&#383;ence of vice, though with the wild
+wi&#383;hes of a corrupt fancy humane emotions
+often kindly mix to &#383;often their
+atrocity. Thus humanity, genero&#383;ity,
+and even &#383;elf-denial, &#383;ometimes render
+a character grand, and even u&#383;eful,
+when hurried away by lawle&#383;s pa&#383;&#383;ions;
+but what can equal the turpitude of a
+cold calculator who lives for him&#383;elf
+alone, and con&#383;idering his fellow-creatures
+merely as machines of plea&#383;ure,
+never forgets that hone&#383;ty is the be&#383;t policy?
+Keeping ever within the pale of
+the law, he cru&#383;hes his thou&#383;ands with
+impunity; but it is with that degree of
+management, which makes him, to borrow
+a &#383;ignificant vulgari&#383;m, a villain
+<i>in grain</i>. The very exce&#383;s of his depravation
+pre&#383;erves him, whil&#383;t the more
+re&#383;pectable bea&#383;t of prey, who prowls<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-50_S" id="DPg_4-50_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-50.png">50</a>]</span>
+about like the lion, and roars to announce
+his approach, falls into a &#383;nare.</p>
+
+<p>You may think it too &#383;oon to form
+an opinion of the future government,
+yet it is impo&#383;&#383;ible to avoid hazarding
+&#383;ome conjectures, when every thing
+whi&#383;pers me, that names, not principles,
+are changed, and when I &#383;ee that
+the turn of the tide has left the dregs of
+the old &#383;y&#383;tem to corrupt the new. For
+the &#383;ame pride of office, the &#383;ame de&#383;ire
+of power are &#383;till vi&#383;ible; with this aggravation,
+that, fearing to return to ob&#383;curity
+after having but ju&#383;t acquired
+a reli&#383;h for di&#383;tinction, each hero, or
+philo&#383;opher, for all are dubbed with
+the&#383;e new titles, endeavours to make
+hay while the &#383;un &#383;hines; and every
+petty municipal officer, become the idol,
+or rather the tyrant of the day, &#383;talks
+like a cock on a dunghil.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-51_S" id="DPg_4-51_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-51.png">51</a>]</span>
+I &#383;hall now conclude this de&#383;ultory
+letter; which however will enable you
+to fore&#383;ee that I &#383;hall treat more of
+morals than manners.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-52_S" id="DPg_4-52_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-52.png">52</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-53_S" id="DPg_4-53_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-53.png">53</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>FRAGMENT</h2>
+<h3>OF</h3>
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h3>ON THE</h3>
+<h2>MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.</h2>
+
+<hr />
+<h3><a name="DV4_CONTENTS_L_S" id="DV4_CONTENTS_L_S"></a>CONTENTS.</h3>
+
+<ul class="plain"><li>Introductory Letter.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter II.</span> Management of the Mother during pregnancy: bathing.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter III.</span> Lying-in.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter IV.</span> The fir&#383;t month: diet: clothing.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter V.</span> The three following months.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter VI.</span> The remainder of the fir&#383;t year.</li>
+<li><span class="smcap">Letter VII.</span> The &#383;econd year, &amp;c: conclu&#383;ion.</li></ul>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-54_S" id="DPg_4-54_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-54.png">54</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-55_S" id="DPg_4-55_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-55.png">55</a>]</span></p>
+
+
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h3>ON THE</h3>
+<h2>MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.</h2>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER I</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I ought</span> to apologize for not having
+written to you on the &#383;ubject you
+mentioned; but, to tell you the truth,
+it grew upon me: and, in&#383;tead of an
+an&#383;wer, I have begun a &#383;eries of letters
+on the management of children in
+their infancy. Replying then to your
+que&#383;tion, I have the public in my<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-56_S" id="DPg_4-56_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-56.png">56</a>]</span>
+thoughts, and &#383;hall endeavour to &#383;how
+what modes appear to me nece&#383;&#383;ary,
+to render the infancy of children more
+healthy and happy. I have long
+thought, that the cau&#383;e which renders
+children as hard to rear as the mo&#383;t
+fragile plant, is our deviation from
+&#383;implicity. I know that &#383;ome able
+phy&#383;icians have recommended the method
+I have pur&#383;ued, and I mean to
+point out the good effects I have ob&#383;erved
+in practice. I am aware that
+many matrons will exclaim again&#383;t me,
+and dwell on the number of children
+they have brought up, as their mothers
+did before them, without troubling
+them&#383;elves with new-fangled notions;
+yet, though, in my uncle Toby's words,
+they &#383;hould attempt to &#383;ilence me, by
+"wi&#383;hing I had &#383;een their large" families,
+I mu&#383;t &#383;uppo&#383;e, while a third part<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-57_S" id="DPg_4-57_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-57.png">57</a>]</span>
+of the human &#383;pecies, according to the
+mo&#383;t accurate calculation, die during
+their infancy, ju&#383;t at the thre&#383;hold of
+life, that there is &#383;ome error in the
+modes adopted by mothers and nur&#383;es,
+which counteracts their own endeavours.
+I may be mi&#383;taken in &#383;ome
+particulars; for general rules, founded
+on the &#383;ounde&#383;t rea&#383;on, demand individual
+modification; but, if I can per&#383;uade
+any of the ri&#383;ing generation to
+exerci&#383;e their rea&#383;on on this head, I am
+content. My advice will probably
+be found mo&#383;t u&#383;eful to mothers in the
+middle cla&#383;s; and it is from them that
+the lower imperceptibly gains improvement.
+Cu&#383;tom, produced by rea&#383;on
+in one, may &#383;afely be the effect of
+imitation in the other.</p>
+
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+<p class="sp">&mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash; &mdash;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-58_S" id="DPg_4-58_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-58.png">58</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-59_S" id="DPg_4-59_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-59.png">59</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h4>TO</h4>
+<h2>Mr. JOHNSON,</h2>
+<h3><i>BOOKSELLER</i>,</h3>
+<h4>IN</h4>
+<h3><span class="smcap">St. PAUL's CHURCH-YARD</span>.</h3>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-60_S" id="DPg_4-60_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-60.png">60</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-61_S" id="DPg_4-61_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-61.png">61</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>LETTERS</h2>
+<h4>TO</h4>
+<h2>Mr. JOHNSON.</h2>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+
+
+<h4>LETTER I</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Dublin, April 14, [1787.]</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; Dear &#383;ir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> &#383;till an invalid&mdash;and begin to
+believe that I ought never to expect to
+enjoy health. My mind preys on my
+body&mdash;and, when I endeavour to be
+u&#383;eful, I grow too much intere&#383;ted for
+my own peace. Confined almo&#383;t entirely
+to the &#383;ociety of children, I am
+anxiou&#383;ly &#383;olicitous for their future
+welfare, and mortified beyond mea&#383;ure,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-62_S" id="DPg_4-62_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-62.png">62</a>]</span>
+when counteracted in my endeavours to
+improve them.&mdash;I feel all a mother's
+fears for the &#383;warm of little ones which
+&#383;urround me, and ob&#383;erve di&#383;orders,
+without having power to apply the
+proper remedies. How can I be reconciled
+to life, when it is always a
+painful warfare, and when I am deprived
+of all the plea&#383;ures I reli&#383;h?&mdash;I
+allude to rational conver&#383;ations, and
+dome&#383;tic affections. Here, alone, a
+poor &#383;olitary individual in a &#383;trange
+land, tied to one &#383;pot, and &#383;ubject to
+the caprice of another, can I be contented?
+I am de&#383;irous to convince you
+that I have <i>&#383;ome</i> cau&#383;e for &#383;orrow&mdash;and
+am not without rea&#383;on detached from
+life. I &#383;hall hope to hear that you are
+well, and am yours &#383;incerely</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">Mary Woll&#383;tonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-63_S" id="DPg_4-63_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-63.png">63</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER II</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Henley, Thur&#383;day, Sept 13.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear &#383;ir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Since</span> I &#383;aw you, I have, literally
+&#383;peaking, <i>enjoyed</i> &#383;olitude. My &#383;i&#383;ter
+could not accompany me in my rambles;
+I therefore wandered alone, by
+the &#383;ide of the Thames, and in the
+neighbouring beautiful fields and
+plea&#383;ure grounds: the pro&#383;pects were
+of &#383;uch a placid kind, I <i>caught</i> tranquillity
+while I &#383;urveyed them&mdash;my mind
+was <i>&#383;till</i>, though active. Were I to
+give you an account how I have &#383;pent
+my time, you would &#383;mile.&mdash;I found an
+old French bible here, and amu&#383;ed
+my&#383;elf with comparing it with our<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-64_S" id="DPg_4-64_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-64.png">64</a>]</span>
+Engli&#383;h tran&#383;lation; then I would li&#383;ten
+to the falling leaves, or ob&#383;erve the
+various tints the autumn gave to
+them&mdash;At other times, the &#383;inging of
+a robin, or the noi&#383;e of a water-mill,
+engaged my attention&mdash;partial attention&mdash;,
+for I was, at the &#383;ame time
+perhaps di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ing &#383;ome knotty point,
+or &#383;traying from this <i>tiny</i> world to new
+&#383;y&#383;tems. After the&#383;e excur&#383;ions, I returned
+to the family meals, told the
+children &#383;tories (they think me <i>va&#383;tly</i>
+agreeable), and my &#383;i&#383;ter was amu&#383;ed.&mdash;Well,
+will you allow me to call this
+way of pa&#383;&#383;ing my days plea&#383;ant?</p>
+
+<p>I was ju&#383;t going to mend my pen;
+but I believe it will enable me to &#383;ay
+all I have to add to this epi&#383;tle. Have
+you yet heard of an habitation for me?
+I often think of my new plan of life;
+and, le&#383;t my &#383;i&#383;ter &#383;hould try to prevail<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-65_S" id="DPg_4-65_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-65.png">65</a>]</span>
+on me to alter it, I have avoided mentioning
+it to her. I am determined!&mdash;Your
+&#383;ex generally laugh at female
+determinations; but let me tell you,
+I never yet re&#383;olved to do, any thing of
+con&#383;equence, that I did not adhere re&#383;olutely
+to it, till I had accompli&#383;hed
+my purpo&#383;e, improbable as it might
+have appeared to a more timid mind.
+In the cour&#383;e of near nine-and-twenty
+years, I have gathered &#383;ome experience,
+and felt many <i>&#383;evere</i> di&#383;appointments&mdash;and
+what is the amount? I long for a
+little peace and <i>independence</i>! Every
+obligation we receive from our fellow-creatures
+is a new &#383;hackle, takes from
+our native freedom, and deba&#383;es the
+mind, makes us mere earthworms&mdash;I
+am not fond of grovelling!</p>
+
+<p class="right">I am, &#383;ir, yours, &amp;c.&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;&ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary woll&#383;tonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-66_S" id="DPg_4-66_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-66.png">66</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER III</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Market Harborough, Sept. 20.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear &#383;ir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> left me with three opulent
+trade&#383;men; their conver&#383;ation was not
+calculated to beguile the way, when
+the &#383;able curtain concealed the beauties
+of nature. I li&#383;tened to the tricks
+of trade&mdash;and &#383;hrunk away, without
+wi&#383;hing to grow rich; even the novelty
+of the &#383;ubjects did not render them
+plea&#383;ing; fond as I am of tracing the
+pa&#383;&#383;ions in all their different forms&mdash;I
+was not &#383;urpri&#383;ed by any glimp&#383;e of the
+&#383;ublime, or beautiful&mdash;though one of
+them imagined I would be a u&#383;eful partner
+in a good <i>firm</i>. I was very much
+fatigued, and have &#383;carcely recovered<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-67_S" id="DPg_4-67_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-67.png">67</a>]</span>
+my&#383;elf. I do not expect to enjoy the
+&#383;ame tranquil plea&#383;ures Henley afforded:
+I meet with new objects to employ
+my mind; but many painful emotions
+are complicated with the reflections
+they give ri&#383;e to.</p>
+
+<p>I do not intend to enter on the <i>old</i>
+topic, yet hope to hear from you&mdash;and
+am yours, &amp;c.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary woll&#383;tonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER IV</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Night.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear &#383;ir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Though</span> your remarks are generally
+judicious&mdash;I cannot <i>now</i> concur with you,
+I mean with re&#383;pect to the preface<a name="FNanchor_67-A_21_S" id="DFNanchor_67-A_21_S"></a><a href="#DFootnote_67-A_21_S" class="fnanchor">[67-A]</a>,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-68_S" id="DPg_4-68_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-68.png">68</a>]</span>
+and have not altered it. I hate the
+u&#383;ual &#383;mooth way of exhibiting proud
+humility. A general rule <i>only</i> extends
+to the majority&mdash;and, believe me, the
+few judicious parents who may peru&#383;e
+my book, will not feel them&#383;elves hurt&mdash;and
+the weak are too vain to mind what
+is &#383;aid in a book intended for children.</p>
+
+<p>I return you the Italian MS.&mdash;but
+do not ha&#383;tily imagine that I am indolent.
+I would not &#383;pare any labour to
+do my duty&mdash;and, after the mo&#383;t laborious
+day, that &#383;ingle thought would
+&#383;olace me more than any plea&#383;ures the
+&#383;en&#383;es could enjoy. I find I could not
+tran&#383;late the MS. well. If it was not
+a MS, I &#383;hould not be &#383;o ea&#383;ily intimidated;
+but the hand, and errors in
+orthography, or abbreviations, are a
+&#383;tumbling-block at the fir&#383;t &#383;etting
+out.&mdash;I cannot bear to do any thing I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-69_S" id="DPg_4-69_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-69.png">69</a>]</span>
+cannot do well&mdash;and I &#383;hould lo&#383;e time
+in the vain attempt.</p>
+
+<p>I had, the other day, the &#383;ati&#383;faction
+of again receiving a letter from my
+poor, dear Margaret<a name="FNanchor_69-A_22_S" id="DFNanchor_69-A_22_S"></a><a href="#DFootnote_69-A_22_S" class="fnanchor">[69-A]</a>.&mdash;With all a
+mother's fondne&#383;s I could tran&#383;cribe a
+part of it&mdash;She &#383;ays, every day her
+affection to me, and dependence on
+heaven increa&#383;e, &amp;c.&mdash;I mi&#383;s her
+innocent care&#383;&#383;es&mdash;and &#383;ometimes indulge
+a plea&#383;ing hope, that &#383;he may be
+allowed to cheer my childle&#383;s age&mdash;if
+I am to live to be old.&mdash;At any rate, I
+may hear of the virtues I may not contemplate&mdash;and
+my rea&#383;on may permit
+me to love a female.&mdash;I now allude to
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;. I have received another letter
+from her, and her childi&#383;h complaints
+vex me&mdash;indeed they do&mdash;As
+u&#383;ual, good-night.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-70_S" id="DPg_4-70_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-70.png">70</a>]</span></p>
+<p>If parents attended to their children,
+I would not have written the &#383;tories;
+for, what are books&mdash;compared to conver&#383;ations
+which affection inforces!&mdash;</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER V</h4>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; My dear &#383;ir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Remember</span> you are to &#383;ettle <i>my account</i>,
+as I want to know how much I
+am in your debt&mdash;but do not &#383;uppo&#383;e
+that I feel any unea&#383;ine&#383;s on that &#383;core.
+The generality of people in trade
+would not be much obliged to me for a
+like civility, <i>but you were a man</i> before
+you were a book&#383;eller&mdash;&#383;o I am your
+&#383;incere friend,</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-71_S" id="DPg_4-71_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-71.png">71</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Friday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> &#383;ick with vexation&mdash;and wi&#383;h
+I could knock my fooli&#383;h head again&#383;t
+the wall, that bodily pain might make
+me feel le&#383;s angui&#383;h from &#383;elf-reproach!
+To &#383;ay the truth, I was never more di&#383;plea&#383;ed
+with my&#383;elf, and I will tell you
+the cau&#383;e.&mdash;You may recollect that I
+did not mention to you the circum&#383;tance
+of &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; having a fortune left
+to him; nor did a hint of it drop from
+me when I conver&#383;ed with my &#383;i&#383;ter;
+becau&#383;e I knew he had a &#383;ufficient motive
+for concealing it. La&#383;t Sunday,
+when his character was a&#383;per&#383;ed, as I
+thought, unju&#383;tly, in the heat of vindi<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-72_S" id="DPg_4-72_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-72.png">72</a>]</span>cation
+I informed ****** that he was
+now independent; but, at the &#383;ame
+time, de&#383;ired him not to repeat my information
+to B&mdash;&mdash;; yet, la&#383;t Tue&#383;day,
+he told him all&mdash;and the boy at B&mdash;&mdash;'s
+gave Mrs. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; an account of it. As
+Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; knew he had only made a
+confident of me (I blu&#383;h to think of it!)
+he gue&#383;&#383;ed the channel of intelligence,
+and this morning came (not to reproach
+me, I wi&#383;h he had!) but to point out the
+injury I have done him.&mdash;Let what will
+be the con&#383;equence, I will reimbur&#383;e
+him, if I deny my&#383;elf the nece&#383;&#383;aries of
+life&mdash;and even then my folly will &#383;ting
+me.&mdash;Perhaps you can &#383;carcely conceive
+the mi&#383;ery I at this moment
+endure&mdash;that I, who&#383;e power of doing
+good is &#383;o limited, &#383;hould do harm, galls
+my very &#383;oul. ****** may laugh at
+the&#383;e qualms&mdash;but, &#383;uppo&#383;ing Mr.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-73_S" id="DPg_4-73_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-73.png">73</a>]</span>
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash; to be unworthy, I am not
+the le&#383;s to blame. Surely it is hell to
+de&#383;pi&#383;e one's &#383;elf!&mdash;I did not want this
+additional vexation&mdash;at this time I have
+many that hang heavily on my &#383;pirits.
+I &#383;hall not call on you this month&mdash;nor
+&#383;tir out.&mdash;My &#383;tomach has been &#383;o &#383;uddenly
+and violently affected, I am
+unable to lean over the de&#383;k.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary woll&#383;tonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER VII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">As</span> I am become a reviewer, I think
+it right, in the way of bu&#383;ine&#383;s, to con&#383;ider
+the &#383;ubject. You have alarmed
+the editor of the Critical, as the adverti&#383;ement
+prefixed to the Appendix<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-74_S" id="DPg_4-74_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-74.png">74</a>]</span>
+plainly &#383;hows. The Critical appears
+to me to be a timid, mean production,
+and its &#383;ucce&#383;s is a reflection on the
+ta&#383;te and judgment of the public; but,
+as a body, who ever gave it credit for
+much? The voice of the people is only
+the voice of truth, when &#383;ome man of
+abilities has had time to get fa&#383;t hold of
+the <span class="smcap">great no&#383;e</span> of the mon&#383;ter. Of
+cour&#383;e, local fame is generally a
+clamour, and dies away. The Appendix
+to the Monthly afforded me more
+amu&#383;ement, though every article almo&#383;t
+wants energy and a <i>cant</i> of virtue and
+liberality is &#383;trewed over it; always
+tame, and eager to pay court to e&#383;tabli&#383;hed
+fame. The account of Necker
+is one unvaried tone of admiration.
+Surely men were born only to provide
+for the &#383;u&#383;tenance of the body by enfeebling
+the mind!</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-75_S" id="DPg_4-75_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-75.png">75</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER VIII</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">You</span> made me very low-&#383;pirited la&#383;t
+night, by your manner of talking.&mdash;You
+are my only friend&mdash;the only
+per&#383;on I am <i>intimate</i> with.&mdash;I never had
+a father, or a brother&mdash;you have been
+both to me, ever &#383;ince I knew you&mdash;yet
+I have &#383;ometimes been very petulant.&mdash;I
+have been thinking of tho&#383;e in&#383;tances
+of ill-humour and quickne&#383;s, and they
+appeared like crimes.</p>
+
+<p class="right">Yours &#383;incerely &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-76_S" id="DPg_4-76_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-76.png">76</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER IX</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Saturday Night.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I am</span> a mere animal, and in&#383;tinctive
+emotions too often &#383;ilence the &#383;ugge&#383;tions
+of rea&#383;on. Your note&mdash;I can
+&#383;carcely tell why, hurt me&mdash;and produced
+a kind of winterly &#383;mile, which
+diffu&#383;es a beam of de&#383;pondent tranquillity
+over the features. I have been
+very ill&mdash;Heaven knows it was more
+than fancy&mdash;After &#383;ome &#383;leeple&#383;s, weari&#383;ome
+nights, towards the morning I
+have grown delirious.&mdash;La&#383;t Thur&#383;day,
+in particular, I imagined &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; was
+thrown into great di&#383;tre&#383;s by his folly;
+and I, unable to a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t him, was in an
+agony. My nerves were in &#383;uch a<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-77_S" id="DPg_4-77_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-77.png">77</a>]</span>
+painful &#383;tate of irritation&mdash;I &#383;uffered
+more than I can expre&#383;s&mdash;Society was
+nece&#383;&#383;ary&mdash;and might have diverted
+me till I gained more &#383;trength; but I
+blu&#383;hed when I recollected how often
+I had teazed you with childi&#383;h complaints,
+and the reveries of a di&#383;ordered
+imagination. I even <i>imagined</i> that I
+intruded on you, becau&#383;e you never
+called on me&mdash;though you perceived
+that I was not well.&mdash;I have nouri&#383;hed
+a &#383;ickly kind of delicacy, which gives
+me many unnece&#383;&#383;ary pangs.&mdash;I acknowledge
+that life is but a je&#383;t&mdash;and
+often a frightful dream&mdash;yet catch
+my&#383;elf every day &#383;earching for &#383;omething
+&#383;erious&mdash;and feel real mi&#383;ery
+from the di&#383;appointment. I am a
+&#383;trange compound of weakne&#383;s and re&#383;olution!
+However, if I mu&#383;t &#383;uffer, I
+will endeavour to &#383;uffer in &#383;ilence.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-78_S" id="DPg_4-78_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-78.png">78</a>]</span>
+There is certainly a great defect in my
+mind&mdash;my wayward heart creates its
+own mi&#383;ery&mdash;Why I am made thus I
+cannot tell; and, till I can form &#383;ome
+idea of the whole of my exi&#383;tence, I
+mu&#383;t be content to weep and dance
+like a child&mdash;long for a toy, and be
+tired of it as &#383;oon as I get it.</p>
+
+<p>We mu&#383;t each of us wear a fool's
+cap; but mine, alas! has lo&#383;t its bells,
+and is grown &#383;o heavy, I find it intolerably
+trouble&#383;ome.&mdash;&mdash;Good-night!
+I have been pur&#383;uing a number of
+&#383;trange thoughts &#383;ince I began to write,
+and have actually both wept and
+laughed immoderately&mdash;Surely I am a
+fool&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary w.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-79_S" id="DPg_4-79_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-79.png">79</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER X</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Monday Morning.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I really</span> want a German grammar,
+as I intend to attempt to learn that
+language&mdash;and I will tell you the rea&#383;on
+why.&mdash;While I live, I am per&#383;uaded,
+I mu&#383;t exert my under&#383;tanding to procure
+an independence, and render
+my&#383;elf u&#383;eful. To make the ta&#383;k ea&#383;ier,
+I ought to &#383;tore my mind with knowledge&mdash;The
+&#383;eed time is pa&#383;&#383;ing away.
+I &#383;ee the nece&#383;&#383;ity of labouring now&mdash;and
+of that nece&#383;&#383;ity I do not complain;
+on the contrary, I am thankful that I
+have more than common incentives to
+pur&#383;ue knowledge, and draw my plea<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-80_S" id="DPg_4-80_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-80.png">80</a>]</span>&#383;ures
+from the employments that are
+within my reach. You perceive this is
+not a gloomy day&mdash;I feel at this moment
+particularly grateful to you&mdash;without
+your humane and <i>delicate</i>
+a&#383;&#383;i&#383;tance, how many ob&#383;tacles &#383;hould I
+not have had to encounter&mdash;too often
+&#383;hould I have been out of patience
+with my fellow-creatures, whom I
+wi&#383;h to love!&mdash;Allow me to love you,
+my dear &#383;ir, and call friend a being I
+re&#383;pect.&mdash;Adieu!</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary w.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-81_S" id="DPg_4-81_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-81.png">81</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XI</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I thought</span> you <i>very</i> unkind, nay,
+very unfeeling, la&#383;t night. My cares
+and vexations&mdash;I will &#383;ay what I allow
+my&#383;elf to think&mdash;do me honour, as they
+ari&#383;e from my di&#383;intere&#383;tedne&#383;s and <i>unbending</i>
+principles; nor can that mode
+of conduct be a reflection on my under&#383;tanding,
+which enables me to bear
+mi&#383;ery, rather than &#383;elfi&#383;hly live for my&#383;elf
+alone. I am not the only character
+de&#383;erving of re&#383;pect, that has had to
+&#383;truggle with various &#383;orrows&mdash;while
+inferior minds have enjoyed local fame
+and pre&#383;ent comfort.&mdash;Dr. John&#383;on's
+cares almo&#383;t drove him mad&mdash;but, I
+&#383;uppo&#383;e, you would quietly have told
+him, he was a fool for not being calm,
+and that wi&#383;e men &#383;triving again&#383;t the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-82_S" id="DPg_4-82_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-82.png">82</a>]</span>
+&#383;tream, can yet be in good humour. I
+have done with in&#383;en&#383;ible human wi&#383;dom,&mdash;"indifference
+cold in wi&#383;dom's
+gui&#383;e,"&mdash;and turn to the &#383;ource of perfection&mdash;who
+perhaps never di&#383;regarded
+an almo&#383;t broken heart, e&#383;pecially when
+a re&#383;pect, a practical re&#383;pect, for virtue,
+&#383;harpened the wounds of adver&#383;ity. I
+am ill&mdash;I &#383;tayed in bed this morning
+till eleven o'clock, only thinking of
+getting money to extricate my&#383;elf out
+of &#383;ome of my difficulties&mdash;The &#383;truggle
+is now over. I will conde&#383;cend to try
+to obtain &#383;ome in a di&#383;agreeable way.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; called on me ju&#383;t now&mdash;pray
+did you know his motive for calling<a name="FNanchor_82-A_23_S" id="DFNanchor_82-A_23_S"></a><a href="#DFootnote_82-A_23_S" class="fnanchor">[82-A]</a>?&mdash;I
+think him impertinently offi<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-83_S" id="DPg_4-83_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-83.png">83</a>]</span>cious.&mdash;He
+had left the hou&#383;e before it
+occurred to me in the &#383;trong light it does
+now, or I &#383;hould have told him &#383;o&mdash;My
+poverty makes me proud&mdash;I will not be
+in&#383;ulted by a &#383;uperficial puppy.&mdash;His
+intimacy with Mi&#383;s &mdash;&mdash;&mdash; gave him a
+privilege, which he &#383;hould not have a&#383;&#383;umed
+with me&mdash;a propo&#383;al might be
+made to his cou&#383;in, a milliner's girl,
+which &#383;hould not have been mentioned
+to me. Pray tell him that I am offended&mdash;and
+do not wi&#383;h to &#383;ee him again!&mdash;When
+I meet him at your hou&#383;e, I &#383;hall
+leave the room, &#383;ince I cannot pull him
+by the no&#383;e. I can force my &#383;pirit to
+leave my body&mdash;but it &#383;hall never bend
+to &#383;upport that body&mdash;God of heaven,
+&#383;ave thy child from this living death!&mdash;I
+&#383;carcely know what I write. My
+hand trembles&mdash;I am very &#383;ick&mdash;&#383;ick at
+heart.&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-84_S" id="DPg_4-84_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-84.png">84</a>]</span></p>
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Tue&#383;day Evening.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; Sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">When</span> you left me this morning, and
+I reflected a moment&mdash;your <i>officious</i>
+me&#383;&#383;age, which at fir&#383;t appeared to me
+a joke&mdash;looked &#383;o very like an in&#383;ult&mdash;I
+cannot forget it&mdash;To prevent then the
+nece&#383;&#383;ity of forcing a &#383;mile&mdash;when I
+chance to meet you&mdash;I take the earlie&#383;t
+opportunity of informing you of my
+real &#383;entiments.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary woll&#383;tonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-85_S" id="DPg_4-85_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-85.png">85</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XIII</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Wedne&#383;day, 3 o'clock.</p>
+
+<p>&ensp; &ensp; &ensp; &ensp; Sir,</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">It</span> is inexpre&#383;&#383;ibly di&#383;agreeable to me
+to be obliged to enter again on a &#383;ubject,
+that has already rai&#383;ed a tumult of
+<i>indignant</i> emotions in my bo&#383;om, which
+I was labouring to &#383;uppre&#383;s when I received
+your letter. I &#383;hall now <i>conde&#383;cend</i>
+to an&#383;wer your epi&#383;tle; but let me
+fir&#383;t tell you, that, in my <i>unprotected</i> &#383;ituation,
+I make a point of never forgiving
+a <i>deliberate in&#383;ult</i>&mdash;and in that light I
+con&#383;ider your late officious conduct.
+It is not according to my nature to
+mince matters&mdash;I will then tell you in<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-86_S" id="DPg_4-86_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-86.png">86</a>]</span>
+plain terms, what I think. I have ever
+con&#383;idered you in the light of a <i>civil</i>
+acquaintance&mdash;on the word friend I lay
+a peculiar empha&#383;is&mdash;and, as a mere
+acquaintance, you were rude and <i>cruel</i>,
+to &#383;tep forward to in&#383;ult a woman,
+who&#383;e conduct and mi&#383;fortunes demand
+re&#383;pect. If my friend, Mr. John&#383;on,
+had made the propo&#383;al&mdash;I &#383;hould have
+been &#383;everely hurt&mdash;have thought him
+unkind and unfeeling, but not <i>impertinent</i>.&mdash;The
+privilege of intimacy you
+had no claim to&mdash;and &#383;hould have referred
+the man to my&#383;elf&mdash;if you had
+not &#383;ufficient di&#383;cernment to qua&#383;h it at
+once. I am, &#383;ir, poor and de&#383;titute.&mdash;Yet
+I have a &#383;pirit that will never bend,
+or take indirect methods, to obtain the
+con&#383;equence I de&#383;pi&#383;e; nay, if to &#383;upport
+life it was nece&#383;&#383;ary to act contrary
+to my principles, the &#383;truggle<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-87_S" id="DPg_4-87_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-87.png">87</a>]</span>
+would &#383;oon be over. I can bear any
+thing but my own contempt.</p>
+
+<p>In a few words, what I call an in&#383;ult,
+is the bare &#383;uppo&#383;ition that I could for
+a moment think of <i>pro&#383;tituting</i> my per&#383;on
+for a maintenance; for in that point of
+view does &#383;uch a marriage appear to
+me, who con&#383;ider right and wrong in
+the ab&#383;tract, and never by words and
+local opinions &#383;hield my&#383;elf from the
+reproaches of my own heart and under&#383;tanding.</p>
+
+<p>It is needle&#383;s to &#383;ay more&mdash;Only you
+mu&#383;t excu&#383;e me when I add, that I wi&#383;h
+never to &#383;ee, but as a perfect &#383;tranger,
+a per&#383;on who could &#383;o gro&#383;&#383;ly mi&#383;take
+my character. An apology is not nece&#383;&#383;ary&mdash;if
+you were inclined to make
+one&mdash;nor any further expo&#383;tulations.&mdash;I
+again repeat, I cannot overlook an
+affront; few indeed have &#383;ufficient de<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-88_S" id="DPg_4-88_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-88.png">88</a>]</span>licacy
+to re&#383;pect poverty, even where
+it gives lu&#383;tre to a character&mdash;and I tell
+you &#383;ir, I am <span class="smcap">poor</span>&mdash;yet can live without
+your benevolent exertions.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary woll&#383;tonecraft.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XIV</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I &#383;end</span> you <i>all</i> the books I had to review
+except Dr. J&mdash;'s Sermons, which
+I have begun. If you wi&#383;h me to look
+over any more tra&#383;h this month&mdash;you
+mu&#383;t &#383;end it directly. I have been &#383;o
+low-&#383;pirited &#383;ince I &#383;aw you&mdash;I was
+quite glad, la&#383;t night, to feel my&#383;elf affected
+by &#383;ome pa&#383;&#383;ages in Dr. J&mdash;'s
+&#383;ermon on the death of his wife&mdash;I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-89_S" id="DPg_4-89_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-89.png">89</a>]</span>
+&#383;eemed (&#383;uddenly) to <i>find</i> my <i>&#383;oul</i> again&mdash;It
+has been for &#383;ome time I cannot
+tell where. Send me the Speaker&mdash;and
+<i>Mary</i>, I want one&mdash;and I &#383;hall &#383;oon
+want &#383;ome paper&mdash;you may as well
+&#383;end it at the &#383;ame time&mdash;for I am trying
+to brace my nerves that I may be
+indu&#383;trious.&mdash;I am afraid rea&#383;on is not a
+good bracer&mdash;for I have been rea&#383;oning
+a long time with my untoward &#383;pirits&mdash;and
+yet my hand trembles.&mdash;I could
+fini&#383;h a period very <i>prettily</i> now, by &#383;aying
+that it ought to be &#383;teady when I
+add that I am yours &#383;incerely,</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<p>If you do not like the manner in
+which I reviewed Dr. J&mdash;'s &#383;&mdash;&mdash; on
+his wife, be it known unto you&mdash;I <i>will</i>
+not do it any other way&mdash;I felt &#383;ome
+plea&#383;ure in paying a ju&#383;t tribute of re<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-90_S" id="DPg_4-90_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-90.png">90</a>]</span>&#383;pect
+to the memory of a man&mdash;who,
+&#383;pite of his faults, I have an affection
+for&mdash;I &#383;ay <i>have</i>, for I believe he is
+&#383;omewhere&mdash;<i>where</i> my &#383;oul has been
+gadding perhaps;&mdash;but <i>you</i> do not live
+on conjectures.</p>
+
+<hr />
+
+<h4>LETTER XV</h4>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">My</span> dear &#383;ir, I &#383;end you a chapter
+which I am plea&#383;ed with, now I &#383;ee it
+in one point of view&mdash;and, as I have
+made free with the author, I hope you
+will not have often to &#383;ay&mdash;what does
+this mean?</p>
+
+<p>You forgot you were to make out<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-91_S" id="DPg_4-91_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-91.png">91</a>]</span>
+my account&mdash;I am, of cour&#383;e, over
+head and ears in debt; but I have not
+that kind of pride, which makes &#383;ome
+di&#383;like to be obliged to tho&#383;e they re&#383;pect.&mdash;On
+the contrary, when I involuntarily
+lament that I have not a father
+or brother, I thankfully recollect that
+I have received unexpected kindne&#383;s
+from you and a few others.&mdash;So rea&#383;on
+allows, what nature impels me to&mdash;for
+I cannot live without loving my fellow-creatures&mdash;nor
+can I love them, without
+di&#383;covering &#383;ome virtue.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">mary.</span></p>
+
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-92_S" id="DPg_4-92_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-92.png">92</a>]</span></p>
+<h4>LETTER XVI</h4>
+
+<p class="right">Paris, December 26, 1792.</p>
+
+<p><span class="smcap">I &#383;hould</span> immediately on the receipt
+of your letter, my dear friend, have
+thanked you for your punctuality, for it
+highly gratified me, had I not wi&#383;hed
+to wait till I could tell you that this
+day was not &#383;tained with blood. Indeed
+the prudent precautions taken by
+the National Convention to prevent a
+tumult, made me &#383;uppo&#383;e that the dogs
+of faction would not dare to bark, much
+le&#383;s to bite, however true to their &#383;cent;
+and I was not mi&#383;taken; for the citizens,
+who were all called out, are returning
+home with compo&#383;ed counte<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-93_S" id="DPg_4-93_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-93.png">93</a>]</span>nances,
+&#383;houldering their arms. About
+nine o'clock this morning, the king
+pa&#383;&#383;ed by my window, moving &#383;ilently
+along (excepting now and then a few
+&#383;trokes on the drum, which rendered
+the &#383;tillne&#383;s more awful) through empty
+&#383;treets, &#383;urrounded by the national guards,
+who, clu&#383;tering round the carriage,
+&#383;eemed to de&#383;erve their name. The
+inhabitants flocked to their windows,
+but the ca&#383;ements were all &#383;hut, not a
+voice was heard, nor did I &#383;ee any
+thing like an in&#383;ulting ge&#383;ture.&mdash;For
+the fir&#383;t time &#383;ince I entered France,
+I bowed to the maje&#383;ty of the people,
+and re&#383;pected the propriety of behaviour
+&#383;o perfectly in uni&#383;on with my own
+feelings. I can &#383;carcely tell you why,
+but an a&#383;&#383;ociation of ideas made the
+tears flow in&#383;en&#383;ibly from my eyes,
+when I &#383;aw Louis &#383;itting, with more<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-94_S" id="DPg_4-94_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-94.png">94</a>]</span>
+dignity than I expected from his character,
+in a hackney coach, going to
+meet death, where &#383;o many of his race
+have triumphed. My fancy in&#383;tantly
+brought Louis XIV before me, entering
+the capital with all his pomp, after
+one of the victories mo&#383;t flattering to
+his pride, only to &#383;ee the &#383;un&#383;hine of
+pro&#383;perity over&#383;hadowed by the &#383;ublime
+gloom of mi&#383;ery. I have been alone
+ever &#383;ince; and, though my mind is
+calm, I cannot di&#383;mi&#383;s the lively images
+that have filled my imagination all the
+day.&mdash;Nay, do not &#383;mile, but pity me;
+for, once or twice, lifting my eyes from
+the paper, I have &#383;een eyes glare
+through a gla&#383;s-door oppo&#383;ite my chair
+and bloody hands &#383;hook at me. Not
+the di&#383;tant &#383;ound of a foot&#383;tep can I
+hear.&mdash;My apartments are remote from
+tho&#383;e of the &#383;ervants, the only per&#383;ons<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-95_S" id="DPg_4-95_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-95.png">95</a>]</span>
+who &#383;leep with me in an immen&#383;e hotel,
+one folding door opening after another.&mdash;I
+wi&#383;h I had even kept the cat with
+me!&mdash;I want to &#383;ee &#383;omething alive;
+death in &#383;o many frightful &#383;hapes has
+taken hold of my fancy.&mdash;I am going to
+bed&mdash;and, for the fir&#383;t time in my life, I
+cannot put out the candle.</p>
+
+<p class="right"><span class="smcap">m. w.</span></p>
+
+<div class="footnotes"><h3>FOOTNOTES:</h3>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_67-A_21_S" id="DFootnote_67-A_21_S"></a><a href="#DFNanchor_67-A_21_S"><span class="label">[67-A]</span></a> To Original Stories.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_69-A_22_S" id="DFootnote_69-A_22_S"></a><a href="#DFNanchor_69-A_22_S"><span class="label">[69-A]</span></a> Counte&#383;s Mount Ca&#383;hel.</p></div>
+
+<div class="footnote"><p><a name="Footnote_82-A_23_S" id="DFootnote_82-A_23_S"></a><a href="#DFNanchor_82-A_23_S"><span class="label">[82-A]</span></a> This alludes to a fooli&#383;h propo&#383;al of marriage
+for mercenary con&#383;iderations, which the gentleman
+here mentioned thought proper to recommend to
+her. The two letters which immediately follow,
+are addre&#383;&#383;ed to the gentleman him&#383;elf.</p></div>
+</div>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-96_S" id="DPg_4-96_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-96.png">96</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-97_S" id="DPg_4-97_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-97.png">97</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2><a name="EXTRACT_S" id="DEXTRACT_S"></a>EXTRACT</h2>
+
+<h4>OF THE</h4>
+
+<h2>CAVE OF FANCY.</h2>
+
+<h3>A TALE.</h3>
+
+<hr />
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p class="center">[<i>Begun to be written in the year 1787, but never completed</i>]</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-98_S" id="DPg_4-98_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-98.png">98</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-99_S" id="DPg_4-99_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-99.png">99</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>CAVE OF FANCY.</h2>
+
+
+
+<hr class="short" />
+<h2><a name="DV4_CHAP_I_S" id="DV4_CHAP_I_S"></a>CHAP. I.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Ye</span> who expect con&#383;tancy where every
+thing is changing, and peace in the
+mid&#383;t of tumult, attend to the voice of
+experience, and mark in time the foot&#383;teps
+of di&#383;appointment, or life will be
+lo&#383;t in de&#383;ultory wi&#383;hes, and death arrive
+before the dawn of wi&#383;dom.</p>
+
+<p>In a &#383;eque&#383;tered valley, &#383;urrounded by
+rocky mountains that intercepted many
+of the pa&#383;&#383;ing clouds, though &#383;unbeams
+variegated their ample &#383;ides, lived a
+&#383;age, to whom nature had unlocked<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-100_S" id="DPg_4-100_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-100.png">100</a>]</span>
+her mo&#383;t hidden &#383;ecrets. His hollow
+eyes, &#383;unk in their orbits, retired from
+the view of vulgar objects, and turned
+inwards, overleaped the boundary pre&#383;cribed
+to human knowledge. Inten&#383;e
+thinking during four&#383;core and ten years,
+had whitened the &#383;cattered locks on
+his head, which, like the &#383;ummit of
+the di&#383;tant mountain, appeared to be
+bound by an eternal fro&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p>On the &#383;andy wa&#383;te behind the mountains,
+the track of ferocious bea&#383;ts
+might be traced, and &#383;ometimes the
+mangled limbs which they left, attracted
+a hovering flight of birds of prey. An
+exten&#383;ive wood the &#383;age had forced to
+rear its head in a &#383;oil by no means congenial,
+and the firm trunks of the trees
+&#383;eemed to frown with defiance on time;
+though the &#383;poils of innumerable &#383;ummers
+covered the roots, which re&#383;embled<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-101_S" id="DPg_4-101_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-101.png">101</a>]</span>
+fangs; &#383;o clo&#383;ely did they cling to the
+unfriendly &#383;and, where &#383;erpents hi&#383;&#383;ed,
+and &#383;nakes, rolling out their va&#383;t folds,
+inhaled the noxious vapours. The ravens
+and owls who inhabited the &#383;olitude,
+gave al&#383;o a thicker gloom to the
+everla&#383;ting twilight, and the croaking
+of the former a monotony, in uni&#383;on
+with the gloom; whil&#383;t lions and tygers,
+&#383;hunning even this faint &#383;emblance of
+day, &#383;ought the dark caverns, and at
+night, when they &#383;hook off &#383;leep, their
+roaring would make the whole valley
+re&#383;ound, confounded with the &#383;creechings
+of the bird of night.</p>
+
+<p>One mountain ro&#383;e &#383;ublime, towering
+above all, on the craggy &#383;ides of which
+a few &#383;ea-weeds grew, wa&#383;hed by the
+ocean, that with tumultuous roar ru&#383;hed
+to a&#383;&#383;ault, and even undermine, the
+huge barrier that &#383;topped its progre&#383;s;<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-102_S" id="DPg_4-102_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-102.png">102</a>]</span>
+and ever and anon a ponderous ma&#383;s,
+loo&#383;ened from the cliff, to which it
+&#383;carcely &#383;eemed to adhere, always threatening
+to fall, fell into the flood, rebounding
+as it fell, and the &#383;ound was re-echoed
+from rock to rock. Look where
+you would, all was without form, as
+if nature, &#383;uddenly &#383;topping her hand,
+had left chaos a retreat.</p>
+
+<p>Clo&#383;e to the mo&#383;t remote &#383;ide of it
+was the &#383;age's abode. It was a rude
+hut, formed of &#383;tumps of trees and
+matted twigs, to &#383;ecure him from the
+inclemency of the weather; only through
+&#383;mall apertures cro&#383;&#383;ed with ru&#383;hes, the
+wind entered in wild murmurs, modulated
+by the&#383;e ob&#383;tructions. A clear
+&#383;pring broke out of the middle of the
+adjacent rock, which, dropping &#383;lowly
+into a cavity it had hollowed, &#383;oon
+overflowed, and then ran, &#383;truggling to<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-103_S" id="DPg_4-103_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-103.png">103</a>]</span>
+free it&#383;elf from the cumbrous fragments,
+till, become a deep, &#383;ilent &#383;tream, it
+e&#383;caped through reeds, and roots of
+trees, who&#383;e bla&#383;ted tops overhung and
+darkened the current.</p>
+
+<p>One &#383;ide of the hut was &#383;upported by
+the rock, and at midnight, when the
+&#383;age &#383;truck the inclo&#383;ed part, it yawned
+wide, and admitted him into a cavern in
+the very bowels of the earth, where
+never human foot before had trod; and
+the various &#383;pirits, which inhabit the
+different regions of nature, were here
+obedient to his potent word. The cavern
+had been formed by the great
+inundation of waters, when the approach
+of a comet forced them from
+their &#383;ource; then, when the fountains
+of the great deep were broken up,
+a &#383;tream ru&#383;hed out of the centre of the
+earth, where the &#383;pirits, who have lived<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-104_S" id="DPg_4-104_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-104.png">104</a>]</span>
+on it, are confined to purify them&#383;elves
+from the dro&#383;s contracted in their fir&#383;t
+&#383;tage of exi&#383;tence; and it flowed in
+black waves, for ever bubbling along
+the cave, the extent of which had never
+been explored. From the &#383;ides and
+top, water di&#383;tilled, and, petrifying as
+it fell, took fanta&#383;tic &#383;hapes, that &#383;oon
+divided it into apartments, if &#383;o they
+might be called. In the foam, a wearied
+&#383;pirit would &#383;ometimes ri&#383;e, to catch
+the mo&#383;t di&#383;tant glimp&#383;e of light, or
+ta&#383;te the vagrant breeze, which the
+yawning of the rock admitted, when
+Sage&#383;tus, for that was the name of the
+hoary &#383;age, entered. Some, who were
+refined and almo&#383;t cleared from vicious
+&#383;pots, he would allow to leave, for a limited
+time, their dark pri&#383;on-hou&#383;e;
+and, flying on the winds acro&#383;s the bleak
+northern ocean, or ri&#383;ing in an exhala<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-105_S" id="DPg_4-105_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-105.png">105</a>]</span>tion
+till they reached a &#383;un-beam, they
+thus re-vi&#383;ited the haunts of men. The&#383;e
+were the guardian angels, who in &#383;oft
+whi&#383;pers re&#383;train the vicious, and animate
+the wavering wretch who &#383;tands
+&#383;u&#383;pended between virtue and vice.</p>
+
+<p>Sage&#383;tus had &#383;pent a night in the cavern,
+as he often did, and he left the
+&#383;ilent ve&#383;tibule of the grave, ju&#383;t as the
+&#383;un, emerging from the ocean, di&#383;per&#383;ed
+the clouds, which were not half
+&#383;o den&#383;e as tho&#383;e he had left. All that
+was human in him rejoiced at the &#383;ight
+of reviving life, and he viewed with
+plea&#383;ure the mounting &#383;ap ri&#383;ing to expand
+the herbs, which grew &#383;pontaneou&#383;ly
+in this wild&mdash;when, turning his
+eyes towards the &#383;ea, he found that
+death had been at work during his ab&#383;ence,
+and terrific marks of a furious
+&#383;torm &#383;till &#383;pread horror around. Though<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-106_S" id="DPg_4-106_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-106.png">106</a>]</span>
+the day was &#383;erene, and threw bright
+rays on eyes for ever &#383;hut, it dawned
+not for the wretches who hung pendent
+on the craggy rocks, or were &#383;tretched
+lifele&#383;s on the &#383;and. Some, &#383;truggling,
+had dug them&#383;elves a grave; others
+had re&#383;igned their breath before the
+impetuous &#383;urge whirled them on &#383;hore.
+A few, in whom the vital &#383;park was
+not &#383;o &#383;oon di&#383;lodged, had clung to
+loo&#383;e fragments; it was the gra&#383;p of
+death; embracing the &#383;tone, they &#383;tiffened;
+and the head, no longer erect,
+re&#383;ted on the ma&#383;s which the arms encircled.
+It felt not the agonizing gripe,
+nor heard the &#383;igh that broke the heart
+in twain.</p>
+
+<p>Re&#383;ting his chin on an oaken club,
+the &#383;age looked on every &#383;ide, to &#383;ee
+if he could di&#383;cern any who yet breathed.
+He drew nearer, and thought he<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-107_S" id="DPg_4-107_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-107.png">107</a>]</span>
+&#383;aw, at the fir&#383;t glance, the unclo&#383;ed eyes
+glare; but &#383;oon perceived that they
+were a mere gla&#383;&#383;y &#383;ub&#383;tance, mute as
+the tongue; the jaws were fallen, and,
+in &#383;ome of the tangled locks, hands
+were clinched; nay, even the nails
+had entered &#383;harpened by de&#383;pair. The
+blood flew rapidly to his heart; it was
+fle&#383;h; he felt he was &#383;till a man, and
+the big tear paced down his iron cheeks,
+who&#383;e mu&#383;cles had not for a long time
+been relaxed by &#383;uch humane emotions.
+A moment he breathed quick, then
+heaved a &#383;igh, and his wonted calm
+returned with an unaccu&#383;tomed glow
+of tenderne&#383;s; for the ways of heaven
+were not hid from him; he lifted up
+his eyes to the common Father of nature,
+and all was as &#383;till in his bo&#383;om, as
+the &#383;mooth deep, after having clo&#383;ed<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-108_S" id="DPg_4-108_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-108.png">108</a>]</span>
+over the huge ve&#383;&#383;el from which the
+wretches had fled.</p>
+
+<p>Turning round a part of the rock
+that jutted out, meditating on the ways
+of Providence, a weak infantine voice
+reached his ears; it was li&#383;ping out the
+name of mother. He looked, and beheld
+a blooming child leaning over, and
+ki&#383;&#383;ing with eager fondne&#383;s, lips that
+were in&#383;en&#383;ible to the warm pre&#383;&#383;ure.
+Starting at the &#383;ight of the &#383;age, &#383;he
+fixed her eyes on him, "Wake her,
+ah! wake her," &#383;he cried, "or the
+&#383;ea will catch us." Again he felt compa&#383;&#383;ion,
+for he &#383;aw that the mother
+&#383;lept the &#383;leep of death. He &#383;tretched
+out his hand, and, &#383;moothing his brow,
+invited her to approach; but &#383;he &#383;till
+intreated him to wake her mother,
+whom &#383;he continued to call, with an
+impatient tremulous voice. To detach<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-109_S" id="DPg_4-109_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-109.png">109</a>]</span>
+her from the body by per&#383;ua&#383;ion would
+not have been very ea&#383;y. Sage&#383;tus had
+a quicker method to effect his purpo&#383;e;
+he took out a box which contained a
+&#383;oporific powder, and as &#383;oon as the
+fumes reached her brain, the powers of
+life were &#383;u&#383;pended.</p>
+
+<p>He carried her directly to his hut,
+and left her &#383;leeping profoundly on his
+ru&#383;hy couch.</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-110_S" id="DPg_4-110_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-110.png">110</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="DV4_CHAP_II_S" id="DV4_CHAP_II_S"></a>CHAP. II.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">Again</span> Sage&#383;tus approached the
+dead, to view them with a more &#383;crutinizing
+eye. He was perfectly acquainted
+with the con&#383;truction of the
+human body, knew the traces that virtue
+or vice leaves on the whole frame;
+they were now indelibly fixed by death;
+nay more, he knew by the &#383;hape of
+the &#383;olid &#383;tructure, how far the &#383;pirit
+could range, and &#383;aw the barrier beyond
+which it could not pa&#383;s: the mazes of
+fancy he explored, mea&#383;ured the &#383;tretch
+of thought, and, weighing all in an
+even balance, could tell whom nature
+had &#383;tamped an hero, a poet, or philo&#383;opher.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-111_S" id="DPg_4-111_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-111.png">111</a>]</span>
+By their appearance, at a tran&#383;ient
+glance, he knew that the ve&#383;&#383;el mu&#383;t
+have contained many pa&#383;&#383;engers, and
+that &#383;ome of them were above the vulgar,
+with re&#383;pect to fortune and education;
+he then walked lei&#383;urely among
+the dead, and narrowly ob&#383;erved their
+pallid features.</p>
+
+<p>His eye fir&#383;t re&#383;ted on a form in which
+proportion reigned, and, &#383;troking back
+the hair, a &#383;pacious forehead met his
+view; warm fancy had revelled there,
+and her airy dance had left ve&#383;tiges,
+&#383;carcely vi&#383;ible to a mortal eye. Some
+perpendicular lines pointed out that
+melancholy had predominated in his
+con&#383;titution; yet the &#383;traggling hairs
+of his eye-brows &#383;howed that anger had
+often &#383;hook his frame; indeed, the
+four temperatures, like the four elements,
+had re&#383;ided in this little world,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-112_S" id="DPg_4-112_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-112.png">112</a>]</span>
+and produced harmony. The whole
+vi&#383;age was bony, and an energetic
+frown had knit the flexible &#383;kin of his
+brow; the kingdom within had been
+exten&#383;ive; and the wild creations of
+fancy had there "a local habitation
+and a name." So exqui&#383;ite was his
+&#383;en&#383;ibility, &#383;o quick his comprehen&#383;ion,
+that he perceived various combinations
+in an in&#383;tant; he caught truth as &#383;he
+darted towards him, &#383;aw all her fair
+proportion at a glance, and the fla&#383;h of
+his eye &#383;poke the quick &#383;en&#383;es which
+conveyed intelligence to his mind; the
+&#383;en&#383;orium indeed was capacious, and
+the &#383;age imagined he &#383;aw the lucid
+beam, &#383;parkling with love or ambition,
+in characters of fire, which a graceful
+curve of the upper eyelid &#383;haded. The
+lips were a little deranged by contempt;
+and a mixture of vanity and<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-113_S" id="DPg_4-113_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-113.png">113</a>]</span>
+&#383;elf-complacency formed a few irregular
+lines round them. The chin had
+&#383;uffered from &#383;en&#383;uality, yet there were
+&#383;till great marks of vigour in it, as if
+advanced with &#383;tern dignity. The
+hand accu&#383;tomed to command, and even
+tyrannize, was unnerved; but its appearance
+convinced Sage&#383;tus, that he
+had oftener wielded a thought than a
+weapon; and that he had &#383;ilenced, by
+irre&#383;i&#383;tible conviction, the &#383;uperficial
+di&#383;putant, and the being, who doubted
+becau&#383;e he had not &#383;trength to believe,
+who, wavering between different borrowed
+opinions, fir&#383;t caught at one
+&#383;traw, then at another, unable to &#383;ettle
+into any con&#383;i&#383;tency of character. After
+gazing a few moments, Sage&#383;tus turned
+away exclaiming, How are the &#383;tately
+oaks torn up by a tempe&#383;t, and the bow<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-114_S" id="DPg_4-114_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-114.png">114</a>]</span>
+un&#383;trung, that could force the arrow
+beyond the ken of the eye!</p>
+
+<p>What a different face next met his
+view! The forehead was &#383;hort, yet well
+&#383;et together; the no&#383;e &#383;mall, but a little
+turned up at the end; and a draw-down
+at the &#383;ides of his mouth, proved that
+he had been a humouri&#383;t, who minded
+the main chance, and could joke with
+his acquaintance, while he eagerly devoured
+a dainty which he was not to
+pay for. His lips &#383;hut like a box who&#383;e
+hinges had often been mended; and
+the mu&#383;cles, which di&#383;play the &#383;oft emotion
+of the heart on the cheeks, were
+grown quite rigid, &#383;o that, the ve&#383;&#383;els
+that &#383;hould have moi&#383;tened them not
+having much communication with the
+grand &#383;ource of pa&#383;&#383;ions, the fine volatile
+fluid had evaporated, and they
+became mere dry fibres, which might<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-115_S" id="DPg_4-115_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-115.png">115</a>]</span>
+be pulled by any mi&#383;fortune that
+threatened him&#383;elf, but were not &#383;ufficiently
+ela&#383;tic to be moved by the
+mi&#383;eries of others. His joints were
+in&#383;erted compactly, and with celerity
+they had performed all the animal
+functions, without any of the grace
+which re&#383;ults from the imagination
+mixing with the &#383;en&#383;es.</p>
+
+<p>A huge form was &#383;tretched near him,
+that exhibited marks of overgrown
+infancy; every part was relaxed; all
+appeared imperfect. Yet, &#383;ome undulating
+lines on the puffed-out cheeks,
+di&#383;played &#383;igns of timid, &#383;ervile good
+nature; and the &#383;kin of the forehead
+had been &#383;o often drawn up by wonder,
+that the few hairs of the eyebrows were
+fixed in a &#383;harp arch, whil&#383;t an ample
+chin re&#383;ted in lobes of fle&#383;h on his protuberant
+brea&#383;t.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-116_S" id="DPg_4-116_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-116.png">116</a>]</span>
+By his &#383;ide was a body that had
+&#383;carcely ever much life in it&mdash;&#383;ympathy
+&#383;eemed to have drawn them together&mdash;every
+feature and limb was round and
+fle&#383;hy, and, if a kind of brutal cunning
+had not marked the face, it might have
+been mi&#383;taken for an automaton, &#383;o unmixed
+was the phlegmatic fluid. The
+vital &#383;park was buried deep in a &#383;oft
+ma&#383;s of matter, re&#383;embling the pith in
+young elder, which, when found, is &#383;o
+equivocal, that it only appears a moi&#383;ter
+part of the &#383;ame body.</p>
+
+<p>Another part of the beach was
+covered with &#383;ailors, who&#383;e bodies exhibited
+marks of &#383;trength and brutal
+courage.&mdash;Their characters were all
+different, though of the &#383;ame cla&#383;s;
+Sage&#383;tus did not &#383;tay to di&#383;criminate
+them, &#383;ati&#383;fied with a rough &#383;ketch.
+He &#383;aw indolence rou&#383;ed by a love of<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-117_S" id="DPg_4-117_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-117.png">117</a>]</span>
+humour, or rather bodily fun; &#383;en&#383;uality
+and prodigality with a vein of genero&#383;ity
+running through it; a contempt
+of danger with gro&#383;s &#383;uper&#383;tition;
+&#383;upine &#383;en&#383;es, only to be kept alive by
+noi&#383;y, tumultuous plea&#383;ures, or that
+kind of novelty which borders on ab&#383;urdity:
+this formed the common outline,
+and the re&#383;t were rather dabs than
+&#383;hades.</p>
+
+<p>Sage&#383;tus pau&#383;ed, and remembered it
+had been &#383;aid by an earthly wit, that
+"many a flower is born to blu&#383;h un&#383;een,
+and wa&#383;te its &#383;weetne&#383;s on the
+de&#383;art air." How little, he exclaimed,
+did that poet know of the ways of
+heaven! And yet, in this re&#383;pect, they
+are direct; the hands before me, were
+de&#383;igned to pull a rope, knock down a
+&#383;heep, or perform the &#383;ervile offices of
+life; no "mute, inglorious poet" re&#383;ts<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-118_S" id="DPg_4-118_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-118.png">118</a>]</span>
+among&#383;t them, and he who is &#383;uperior
+to his fellow, does not ri&#383;e above mediocrity.
+The genius that &#383;prouts from
+a dunghil &#383;oon &#383;hakes off the heterogenous
+ma&#383;s; tho&#383;e only grovel, who
+have not power to fly.</p>
+
+<p>He turned his &#383;tep towards the mother
+of the orphan: another female
+was at &#383;ome di&#383;tance; and a man who,
+by his garb, might have been the hu&#383;band,
+or brother, of the former, was
+not far off.</p>
+
+<p>Him the &#383;age &#383;urveyed with an attentive
+eye, and bowed with re&#383;pect
+to the inanimate clay, that lately had
+been the dwelling of a mo&#383;t benevolent
+&#383;pirit. The head was &#383;quare, though
+the features were not very prominent;
+but there was a great harmony in every
+part, and the turn of the no&#383;trils and
+lips evinced, that the &#383;oul mu&#383;t have<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-119_S" id="DPg_4-119_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-119.png">119</a>]</span>
+had ta&#383;te, to which they had &#383;erved as
+organs. Penetration and judgment
+were &#383;eated on the brows that overhung
+the eye. Fixed as it was, Sage&#383;tus
+quickly di&#383;cerned the expre&#383;&#383;ion
+it mu&#383;t have had; dark and pen&#383;ive,
+rather from &#383;lowne&#383;s of comprehen&#383;ion
+than melancholy, it &#383;eemed to ab&#383;orb
+the light of knowledge, to drink it in
+ray by ray; nay, a new one was not
+allowed to enter his head till the la&#383;t
+was arranged: an opinion was thus
+cautiou&#383;ly received, and maturely
+weighed, before it was added to the
+general &#383;tock. As nature led him to
+mount from a part to the whole, he
+was mo&#383;t conver&#383;ant with the beautiful,
+and rarely comprehended the &#383;ublime;
+yet, &#383;aid Sage&#383;tus, with a &#383;oftened tone,
+he was all heart, full of forbearance, and
+de&#383;irous to plea&#383;e every fellow-creature;<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-120_S" id="DPg_4-120_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-120.png">120</a>]</span>
+but from a nobler motive than a love
+of admiration; the fumes of vanity
+never mounted to cloud his brain, or
+tarni&#383;h his beneficence. The fluid in
+which tho&#383;e placid eyes &#383;wam, is now
+congealed; how often has tenderne&#383;s
+given them the fine&#383;t water! Some
+torn parts of the child's dre&#383;s hung
+round his arm, which led the &#383;age to
+conclude, that he had &#383;aved the child;
+every line in his face confirmed the
+conjecture; benevolence indeed &#383;trung
+the nerves that naturally were not
+very firm; it was the great knot that
+tied together the &#383;cattered qualities,
+and gave the di&#383;tinct &#383;tamp to the character.</p>
+
+<p>The female whom he next approached,
+and &#383;uppo&#383;ed to be an attendant on
+the other, was below the middle &#383;ize,
+and her legs were &#383;o di&#383;proportionably<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-121_S" id="DPg_4-121_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-121.png">121</a>]</span>
+&#383;hort, that, when &#383;he moved, &#383;he mu&#383;t
+have waddled along; her elbows were
+drawn in to touch her long taper, wai&#383;t,
+and the air of her whole body was an
+affectation of gentility. Death could
+not alter the rigid hang of her limbs, or
+efface the &#383;imper that had &#383;tretched her
+mouth; the lips were thin, as if nature
+intended &#383;he &#383;hould mince her words;
+her no&#383;e was &#383;mall, and &#383;harp at the
+end; and the forehead, unmarked by
+eyebrows, was wrinkled by the di&#383;content
+that had &#383;unk her cheeks, on
+which Sage&#383;tus &#383;till di&#383;cerned faint
+traces of tenderne&#383;s; and fierce good-nature,
+he perceived had &#383;ometimes
+animated the little &#383;park of an eye that
+anger had oftener lighted. The &#383;ame
+thought occurred to him that the &#383;ight
+of the &#383;ailors had &#383;ugge&#383;ted, Men and
+women are all in their proper places<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-122_S" id="DPg_4-122_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-122.png">122</a>]</span>&mdash;this
+female was intended to fold up
+linen and nur&#383;e the &#383;ick.</p>
+
+<p>Anxious to ob&#383;erve the mother of
+his charge, he turned to the lily that
+had been &#383;o rudely &#383;napped, and, carefully
+ob&#383;erving it, traced every fine line
+to its &#383;ource. There was a delicacy in
+her form, &#383;o truly feminine, that an involuntary
+de&#383;ire to cheri&#383;h &#383;uch a being,
+made the &#383;age again feel the almo&#383;t forgotten
+&#383;en&#383;ations of his nature. On
+ob&#383;erving her more clo&#383;ely, he di&#383;covered
+that her natural delicacy had been
+increa&#383;ed by an improper education,
+to a degree that took away all vigour
+from her faculties. And its baneful
+influence had had &#383;uch an effect on her
+mind, that few traces of the exertions
+of it appeared on her face, though the
+fine fini&#383;h of her features, and particularly
+the form of the forehead, con<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-123_S" id="DPg_4-123_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-123.png">123</a>]</span>vinced
+the &#383;age that her under&#383;tanding
+might have ri&#383;en con&#383;iderably above
+mediocrity, had the wheels ever been
+put in motion; but, clogged by prejudices,
+they never turned quite round,
+and, whenever &#383;he con&#383;idered a &#383;ubject,
+&#383;he &#383;topped before &#383;he came to a conclu&#383;ion.
+A&#383;&#383;uming a ma&#383;k of propriety,
+&#383;he had bani&#383;hed nature; yet
+its tendency was only to be diverted,
+not &#383;tifled. Some lines, which took
+from the &#383;ymmetry of the mouth, not
+very obvious to a &#383;uperficial ob&#383;erver,
+&#383;truck Sage&#383;tus, and they appeared to
+him characters of indolent ob&#383;tinacy.
+Not having courage to form an opinion
+of her own, &#383;he adhered, with blind
+partiality, to tho&#383;e &#383;he adopted, which
+&#383;he received in the lump, and, as they
+always remained unopened, of cour&#383;e
+&#383;he only &#383;aw the even glo&#383;s on the out<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-124_S" id="DPg_4-124_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-124.png">124</a>]</span>&#383;ide.
+Ve&#383;tiges of anger were vi&#383;ible on
+her brow, and the &#383;age concluded, that
+&#383;he had often been offended with, and
+indeed would &#383;carcely make any allowance
+for, tho&#383;e who did not coincide
+with her in opinion, as things always
+appear &#383;elf-evident that have never
+been examined; yet her very weakne&#383;s
+gave a charming timidity to her countenance;
+goodne&#383;s and tenderne&#383;s pervaded
+every lineament, and melted in
+her dark blue eyes. The compa&#383;&#383;ion
+that wanted activity, was &#383;incere, though
+it only embelli&#383;hed her face, or produced
+ca&#383;ual acts of charity when a
+moderate alms could relieve pre&#383;ent
+di&#383;tre&#383;s. Unacquainted with life, fictitious,
+unnatural di&#383;tre&#383;s drew the tears
+that were not &#383;hed for real mi&#383;ery. In
+its own &#383;hape, human wretchedne&#383;s
+excites a little di&#383;gu&#383;t in the mind that<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-125_S" id="DPg_4-125_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-125.png">125</a>]</span>
+has indulged &#383;ickly refinement. Perhaps
+the &#383;age gave way to a little conjecture
+in drawing the la&#383;t conclu&#383;ion;
+but his conjectures generally aro&#383;e from
+di&#383;tinct ideas, and a dawn of light
+allowed him to &#383;ee a great way farther
+than common mortals.</p>
+
+<p>He was now convinced that the orphan
+was not very unfortunate in having
+lo&#383;t &#383;uch a mother. The parent that
+in&#383;pires fond affection without re&#383;pect,
+is &#383;eldom an u&#383;eful one; and they only
+are re&#383;pectable, who con&#383;ider right and
+wrong ab&#383;tracted from local forms and
+accidental modifications.</p>
+
+<p>Determined to adopt the child, he
+named it after him&#383;elf, Sage&#383;ta, and
+retired to the hut where the innocent
+&#383;lept, to think of the be&#383;t method of
+educating this child, whom the angry
+deep had &#383;pared.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-126_S" id="DPg_4-126_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-126.png">126</a>]</span>
+[The la&#383;t branch of the education of
+Sage&#383;ta, con&#383;i&#383;ted of a variety of characters
+and &#383;tories pre&#383;ented to her
+in the Cave of Fancy, of which the
+following is a &#383;pecimen.]</p>
+
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-127_S" id="DPg_4-127_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-127.png">127</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="CHAP_S" id="DCHAP_S"></a>CHAP.</h2>
+
+
+<p><span class="smcap">A form</span> now approached that
+particularly &#383;truck and intere&#383;ted Sage&#383;ta.
+The &#383;age, ob&#383;erving what pa&#383;&#383;ed in her
+mind, bade her ever tru&#383;t to the fir&#383;t
+impre&#383;&#383;ion. In life, he continued, try
+to remember the effect the fir&#383;t appearance
+of a &#383;tranger has on your mind;
+and, in proportion to your &#383;en&#383;ibility,
+you may decide on the character. Intelligence
+glances from eyes that have
+the &#383;ame pur&#383;uits, and a benevolent
+heart &#383;oon traces the marks of benevolence
+on the countenance of an unknown
+fellow-creature; and not only
+the countenance, but the ge&#383;tures, the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-128_S" id="DPg_4-128_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-128.png">128</a>]</span>
+voice, loudly &#383;peak truth to the unprejudiced
+mind.</p>
+
+<p>Whenever a &#383;tranger advances towards
+you with a tripping &#383;tep, receives
+you with broad &#383;miles, and a profu&#383;ion
+of compliments, and yet you find your&#383;elf
+embarra&#383;&#383;ed and unable to return
+the &#383;alutation with equal cordiality, be
+a&#383;&#383;ured that &#383;uch a per&#383;on is affected,
+and endeavours to maintain a very good
+character in the eyes of the world,
+without really practi&#383;ing the &#383;ocial virtues
+which dre&#383;s the face in looks of
+unfeigned complacency. Kindred minds
+are drawn to each other by expre&#383;&#383;ions
+which elude de&#383;cription; and, like the
+calm breeze that plays on a &#383;mooth
+lake, they are rather felt than &#383;een.
+Beware of a man who always appears in
+good humour; a &#383;elfi&#383;h de&#383;ign too frequently
+lurks in the &#383;miles the heart<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-129_S" id="DPg_4-129_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-129.png">129</a>]</span>
+never curved; or there is an affectation
+of candour that de&#383;troys all &#383;trength of
+character, by blending truth and fal&#383;hood
+into an unmeaning ma&#383;s. The
+mouth, in fact, &#383;eems to be the feature
+where you may trace every kind of di&#383;&#383;imulation,
+from the &#383;imper of vanity,
+to the fixed &#383;mile of the de&#383;igning villain.
+Perhaps, the modulations of
+the voice will &#383;till more quickly give
+a key to the character than even the
+turns of the mouth, or the words
+that i&#383;&#383;ue from it; often do the
+tones of unpracti&#383;ed di&#383;&#383;emblers give
+the lie to their a&#383;&#383;ertions. Many
+people never &#383;peak in an unnatural
+voice, but when they are in&#383;incere: the
+phra&#383;es not corre&#383;ponding with the
+dictates of the heart, have nothing to
+keep them in tune. In the cour&#383;e of
+an argument however, you may ea&#383;ily
+di&#383;cover whether vanity or conviction<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-130_S" id="DPg_4-130_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-130.png">130</a>]</span>
+&#383;timulates the di&#383;putant, though his
+inflated countenance may be turned
+from you, and you may not &#383;ee the
+ge&#383;tures which mark &#383;elf-&#383;ufficiency.
+He &#383;topped, and the &#383;pirit began.</p>
+
+<p>I have wandered through the cave;
+and, as &#383;oon as I have taught you a u&#383;eful
+le&#383;&#383;on, I &#383;hall take my flight where
+my tears will cea&#383;e to flow, and where
+mine eyes will no more be &#383;hocked
+with the &#383;ight of guilt and &#383;orrow.
+Before many moons have changed,
+thou wilt enter, O mortal! into that
+world I have lately left. Li&#383;ten to my
+warning voice, and tru&#383;t not too much
+to the goodne&#383;s which I perceive re&#383;ides
+in thy brea&#383;t. Let it be reined in by
+principles, le&#383;t thy very virtue &#383;harpen
+the &#383;ting of remor&#383;e, which as naturally
+follows di&#383;order in the moral world, as
+pain attends on intemperance in the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-131_S" id="DPg_4-131_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-131.png">131</a>]</span>
+phy&#383;ical. But my hi&#383;tory will afford you
+more in&#383;truction than mere advice. Sage&#383;tus
+concurred in opinion with her,
+ob&#383;erving that the &#383;en&#383;es of children
+&#383;hould be the fir&#383;t object of improvement;
+then their pa&#383;&#383;ions worked on; and judgment
+the fruit, mu&#383;t be the acquirement
+of the being it&#383;elf, when out of
+leading-&#383;trings. The &#383;pirit bowed a&#383;&#383;ent,
+and, without any further prelude,
+entered on her hi&#383;tory.</p>
+
+<p>My mother was a mo&#383;t re&#383;pectable
+character, but &#383;he was yoked to a man
+who&#383;e follies and vices made her ever
+feel the weight of her chains. The
+fir&#383;t &#383;en&#383;ation I recollect, was pity; for
+I have &#383;een her weep over me and the
+re&#383;t of her babes, lamenting that the
+extravagance of a father would throw
+us de&#383;titute on the world. But, though
+my father was extravagant, and &#383;eldom<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-132_S" id="DPg_4-132_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-132.png">132</a>]</span>
+thought of any thing but his own plea&#383;ures,
+our education was not neglected.
+In &#383;olitude, this employment was my
+mother's only &#383;olace; and my father's
+pride made him procure us ma&#383;ters;
+nay, &#383;ometimes he was &#383;o gratified by
+our improvement, that he would embrace
+us with tenderne&#383;s, and intreat
+my mother to forgive him, with marks
+of real contrition. But the affection his
+penitence gave ri&#383;e to, only &#383;erved to
+expo&#383;e her to continual di&#383;appointments,
+and keep hope alive merely to
+torment her. After a violent debauch
+he would let his beard grow, and the
+&#383;adne&#383;s that reigned in the hou&#383;e I &#383;hall
+never forget; he was a&#383;hamed to meet
+even the eyes of his children. This is &#383;o
+contrary to the nature of things, it
+gave me exqui&#383;ite pain; I u&#383;ed, at tho&#383;e
+times, to &#383;how him extreme re&#383;pect. I<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-133_S" id="DPg_4-133_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-133.png">133</a>]</span>
+could not bear to &#383;ee my parent humble
+him&#383;elf before me. However neither
+his con&#383;titution, nor fortune could
+long bear the con&#383;tant wa&#383;te. He had,
+I have ob&#383;erved, a childi&#383;h affection
+for his children, which was di&#383;played
+in care&#383;&#383;es that gratified him for the
+moment, yet never re&#383;trained the headlong
+fury of his appetites; his momentary
+repentance wrung his heart, without
+influencing his conduct; and he died,
+leaving an encumbered wreck of a good
+e&#383;tate.</p>
+
+<p>As we had always lived in &#383;plendid
+poverty, rather than in affluence, the
+&#383;hock was not &#383;o great; and my mother
+repre&#383;&#383;ed her angui&#383;h, and concealed
+&#383;ome circum&#383;tances, that &#383;he might not
+&#383;hed a de&#383;tructive mildew over the
+gaiety of youth.</p>
+
+<p>So fondly did I doat on this dear pa<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-134_S" id="DPg_4-134_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-134.png">134</a>]</span>rent,
+that &#383;he engro&#383;&#383;ed all my tenderne&#383;s;
+her &#383;orrows had knit me firmly to
+her, and my chief care was to give her
+proofs of affection. The gallantry that
+afforded my companions, the few young
+people my mother forced me to mix
+with, &#383;o much plea&#383;ure, I de&#383;pi&#383;ed; I
+wi&#383;hed more to be loved than admired,
+for I could love. I adored virtue; and
+my imagination, cha&#383;ing a chimerical
+object, overlooked the common plea&#383;ures
+of life; they were not &#383;ufficient for my
+happine&#383;s. A latent fire made me burn
+to ri&#383;e &#383;uperior to my contemporaries in
+wi&#383;dom and virtue; and tears of joy
+and emulation filled my eyes when I
+read an account of a great action&mdash;I
+felt admiration, not a&#383;toni&#383;hment.</p>
+
+<p>My mother had two particular friends,
+who endeavoured to &#383;ettle her affairs;
+one was a middle-aged man, a mer<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-135_S" id="DPg_4-135_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-135.png">135</a>]</span>chant;
+the human brea&#383;t never en&#383;hrined
+a more benevolent heart. His
+manners were rather rough, and he
+bluntly &#383;poke his thoughts without ob&#383;erving
+the pain it gave; yet he po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ed
+extreme tenderne&#383;s, as far as his di&#383;cernment
+went. Men do not make
+&#383;ufficient di&#383;tinction, &#383;aid &#383;he, digre&#383;&#383;ing
+from her &#383;tory to addre&#383;s Sage&#383;tus, between
+tenderne&#383;s and &#383;en&#383;ibility.</p>
+
+<p>To give the &#383;horte&#383;t definition of &#383;en&#383;ibility,
+replied the &#383;age, I &#383;hould &#383;ay
+that it is the re&#383;ult of acute &#383;en&#383;es, finely
+fa&#383;hioned nerves, which vibrate at the
+&#383;lighte&#383;t touch, and convey &#383;uch clear intelligence
+to the brain, that it does not
+require to be arranged by the judgment.
+Such per&#383;ons in&#383;tantly enter into the
+characters of others, and in&#383;tinctively
+di&#383;cern what will give pain to every
+human being; their own feelings are<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-136_S" id="DPg_4-136_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-136.png">136</a>]</span>
+&#383;o varied that they &#383;eem to contain in
+them&#383;elves, not only all the pa&#383;&#383;ions of the
+&#383;pecies, but their various modifications.
+Exqui&#383;ite pain and plea&#383;ure is their
+portion; nature wears for them a different
+a&#383;pect than is di&#383;played to common
+mortals. One moment it is a paradi&#383;e;
+all is beautiful: a cloud ari&#383;es, an emotion
+receives a &#383;udden damp; darkne&#383;s
+invades the &#383;ky, and the world is an
+unweeded garden;&mdash;but go on with
+your narrative, &#383;aid Sage&#383;tus, recollecting
+him&#383;elf.</p>
+
+<p>She proceeded. The man I am de&#383;cribing
+was humanity it&#383;elf; but frequently
+he did not under&#383;tand me; many of my
+feelings were not to be analyzed by
+his common &#383;en&#383;e. His friend&#383;hips,
+for he had many friends, gave him plea&#383;ure
+unmixed with pain; his religion
+was coldly rea&#383;onable, becau&#383;e he want<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-137_S" id="DPg_4-137_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-137.png">137</a>]</span>ed
+fancy, and he did not feel the nece&#383;&#383;ity
+of finding, or creating, a perfect
+object, to an&#383;wer the one engraved on
+his heart: the &#383;ketch there was faint.
+He went with the &#383;tream, and rather
+caught a character from the &#383;ociety he
+lived in, than &#383;pread one around him.
+In my mind many opinions were graven
+with a pen of bra&#383;s, which he thought
+chimerical: but time could not era&#383;e
+them, and I now recognize them as
+the &#383;eeds of eternal happine&#383;s: they
+will &#383;oon expand in tho&#383;e realms where
+I &#383;hall enjoy the bli&#383;s adapted to my
+nature; this is all we need a&#383;k of the
+Supreme Being; happine&#383;s mu&#383;t follow
+the completion of his de&#383;igns. He
+however could live quietly, without
+giving a preponderancy to many important
+opinions that continually obtruded
+on my mind; not having an en<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-138_S" id="DPg_4-138_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-138.png">138</a>]</span>thu&#383;ia&#383;tic
+affection for his fellow creatures,
+he did them good, without &#383;uffering
+from their follies. He was particularly
+attached to me, and I felt for
+him all the affection of a daughter;
+often, when he had been intere&#383;ting
+him&#383;elf to promote my welfare, have I
+lamented that he was not my father;
+lamented that the vices of mine had
+dried up one &#383;ource of pure affection.</p>
+
+<p>The other friend I have already alluded
+to, was of a very different character;
+greatne&#383;s of mind, and tho&#383;e
+combinations of feeling which are &#383;o
+difficult to de&#383;cribe, rai&#383;ed him above
+the throng, that bu&#383;tle their hour out,
+lie down to &#383;leep, and are forgotten.
+But I &#383;hall &#383;oon &#383;ee him, &#383;he exclaimed,
+as much &#383;uperior to his former &#383;elf, as
+he then ro&#383;e in my eyes above his fellow
+creatures! As &#383;he &#383;poke, a glow<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-139_S" id="DPg_4-139_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-139.png">139</a>]</span>
+of delight animated each feature; her
+countenance appeared tran&#383;parent; and
+&#383;he &#383;ilently anticipated the happine&#383;s
+&#383;he &#383;hould enjoy, when &#383;he entered tho&#383;e
+man&#383;ions, where death-divided friends
+&#383;hould meet, to part no more; where
+human weakne&#383;s could not damp their
+bli&#383;s, or poi&#383;on the cup of joy that, on
+earth, drops from the lips as &#383;oon as
+ta&#383;ted, or, if &#383;ome daring mortal &#383;natches
+a ha&#383;ty draught, what was &#383;weet to the
+ta&#383;te becomes a root of bitterne&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p>He was unfortunate, had many cares
+to &#383;truggle with, and I marked on his
+cheeks traces of the &#383;ame &#383;orrows that
+&#383;unk my own. He was unhappy I &#383;ay,
+and perhaps pity might fir&#383;t have awoke
+my tenderne&#383;s; for, early in life, an
+artful woman worked on his compa&#383;&#383;ionate
+&#383;oul, and he united his fate to
+a being made up of &#383;uch jarring ele<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-140_S" id="DPg_4-140_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-140.png">140</a>]</span>ments,
+that he was &#383;till alone. The
+di&#383;covery did not extingui&#383;h that propen&#383;ity
+to love, a high &#383;en&#383;e of virtue
+fed. I &#383;aw him &#383;ick and unhappy,
+without a friend to &#383;ooth the hours
+languor made heavy; often did I &#383;it a
+long winter's evening by his &#383;ide, railing
+at the &#383;wift wings of time, and
+terming my love, humanity.</p>
+
+<p>Two years pa&#383;&#383;ed in this manner, &#383;ilently
+rooting my affection; and it might
+have continued calm, if a fever had
+not brought him to the very verge of
+the grave. Though &#383;till deceived, I was
+mi&#383;erable that the cu&#383;toms of the world
+did not allow me to watch by him;
+when &#383;leep for&#383;ook his pillow, my wearied
+eyes were not clo&#383;ed, and my
+anxious &#383;pirit hovered round his bed.
+I &#383;aw him, before he had recovered his
+&#383;trength; and, when his hand touched<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-141_S" id="DPg_4-141_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-141.png">141</a>]</span>
+mine, life almo&#383;t retired, or flew to
+meet the touch. The fir&#383;t look found
+a ready way to my heart, and thrilled
+through every vein. We were left
+alone, and in&#383;en&#383;ibly began to talk of
+the immortality of the &#383;oul; I declared
+that I could not live without this conviction.
+In the ardour of conver&#383;ation
+he pre&#383;&#383;ed my hand to his heart; it
+re&#383;ted there a moment, and my emotions
+gave weight to my opinion, for
+the affection we felt was not of a peri&#383;hable
+nature.&mdash;A &#383;ilence en&#383;ued, I
+know not how long; he then threw
+my hand from him, as if it had been a
+&#383;erpent; formally complained of the
+weather, and adverted to twenty other
+unintere&#383;ting &#383;ubjects. Vain efforts!
+Our hearts had already &#383;poken to
+each other.</p>
+
+<p>Feebly did I afterwards combat an<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-142_S" id="DPg_4-142_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-142.png">142</a>]</span>
+affection, which &#383;eemed twi&#383;ted in every
+fibre of my heart. The world &#383;tood &#383;till
+when I thought of him; it moved heavily
+at be&#383;t, with one who&#383;e very con&#383;titution
+&#383;eemed to mark her out for mi&#383;ery.
+But I will not dwell on the pa&#383;&#383;ion
+I too fondly nur&#383;ed. One only refuge
+had I on earth; I could not re&#383;olutely
+de&#383;olate the &#383;cene my fancy flew to,
+when worldly cares, when a knowledge
+of mankind, which my circum&#383;tances
+forced on me, rendered every other
+in&#383;ipid. I was afraid of the unmarked
+vacuity of common life; yet, though I
+&#383;upinely indulged my&#383;elf in fairy-land,
+when I ought to have been more actively
+employed, virtue was &#383;till the
+fir&#383;t mover of my actions; &#383;he dre&#383;&#383;ed
+my love in &#383;uch enchanting colours,
+and &#383;pread the net I could never break.
+Our corre&#383;ponding feelings confounded<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-143_S" id="DPg_4-143_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-143.png">143</a>]</span>
+our very &#383;ouls; and in many conver&#383;ations
+we almo&#383;t intuitively di&#383;cerned
+each other's &#383;entiments; the heart opened
+it&#383;elf, not chilled by re&#383;erve, nor
+afraid of mi&#383;con&#383;truction. But, if virtue
+in&#383;pired love, love gave new energy to
+virtue, and ab&#383;orbed every &#383;elfi&#383;h pa&#383;&#383;ion.
+Never did even a wi&#383;h e&#383;cape
+me, that my lover &#383;hould not fulfil the
+hard duties which fate had impo&#383;ed on
+him. I only di&#383;&#383;embled with him in
+one particular; I endeavoured to &#383;often
+his wife's too con&#383;picuous follies, and
+extenuated her failings in an indirect
+manner. To this I was prompted by a
+loftine&#383;s of &#383;pirit; I &#383;hould have broken
+the band of life, had I cea&#383;ed to re&#383;pect
+my&#383;elf. But I will ha&#383;ten to an important
+change in my circum&#383;tances.</p>
+
+<p>My mother, who had concealed the
+real &#383;tate of her affairs from me, was<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-144_S" id="DPg_4-144_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-144.png">144</a>]</span>
+now impelled to make me her confident,
+that I might a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t to di&#383;charge
+her mighty debt of gratitude. The
+merchant, my more than father, had
+privately a&#383;&#383;i&#383;ted her: but a fatal civil-war
+reduced his large property to a
+bare competency; and an inflammation
+in his eyes, that aro&#383;e from a cold he
+had caught at a wreck, which he watched
+during a &#383;tormy night to keep off
+the lawle&#383;s colliers, almo&#383;t deprived
+him of &#383;ight. His life had been &#383;pent
+in &#383;ociety, and he &#383;carcely knew how
+to fill the void; for his &#383;pirit would not
+allow him to mix with his former
+equals as an humble companion; he
+who had been treated with uncommon
+re&#383;pect, could not brook their in&#383;ulting
+pity. From the re&#383;ource of &#383;olitude,
+reading, the complaint in his eyes cut<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-145_S" id="DPg_4-145_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-145.png">145</a>]</span>
+him off, and he became our con&#383;tant
+vi&#383;itor.</p>
+
+<p>Actuated by the &#383;incere&#383;t affection,
+I u&#383;ed to read to him, and he mi&#383;took
+my tenderne&#383;s for love. How could I
+undeceive him, when every circum&#383;tance
+frowned on him! Too &#383;oon I
+found that I was his only comfort; I,
+who rejected his hand when fortune
+&#383;miled, could not now &#383;econd her blow;
+and, in a moment of enthu&#383;ia&#383;tic gratitude
+and tender compa&#383;&#383;ion, I offered
+him my hand.&mdash;It was received with
+plea&#383;ure; tran&#383;port was not made for
+his &#383;oul; nor did he di&#383;cover that nature
+had &#383;eparated us, by making me
+alive to &#383;uch different &#383;en&#383;ations. My
+mother was to live with us, and I
+dwelt on this circum&#383;tance to bani&#383;h
+cruel recollections, when the bent bow
+returned to its former &#383;tate.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-146_S" id="DPg_4-146_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-146.png">146</a>]</span>
+With a bur&#383;ting heart and a firm
+voice, I named the day when I was to
+&#383;eal my promi&#383;e. It came, in &#383;pite of
+my regret; I had been previou&#383;ly preparing
+my&#383;elf for the awful ceremony,
+and an&#383;wered the &#383;olemn que&#383;tion with
+a re&#383;olute tone, that would &#383;ilence the
+dictates of my heart; it was a forced,
+unvaried one; had nature modulated
+it, my &#383;ecret would have e&#383;caped. My
+active &#383;pirit was painfully on the watch
+to repre&#383;s every tender emotion. The
+joy in my venerable parent's countenance,
+the tenderne&#383;s of my hu&#383;band,
+as he conducted me home, for I really
+had a &#383;incere affection for him, the gratulations
+of my mind, when I thought
+that this &#383;acrifice was heroic, all tended
+to deceive me; but the joy of victory
+over the re&#383;igned, pallid look of my
+lover, haunted my imagination, and<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-147_S" id="DPg_4-147_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-147.png">147</a>]</span>
+fixed it&#383;elf in the centre of my brain.&mdash;Still
+I imagined, that his &#383;pirit was near
+me, that he only felt &#383;orrow for my
+lo&#383;s, and without complaint re&#383;igned
+me to my duty.</p>
+
+<p>I was left alone a moment; my two
+elbows re&#383;ted on a table to &#383;upport my
+chin. Ten thou&#383;and thoughts darted
+with a&#383;toni&#383;hing velocity through my
+mind. My eyes were dry; I was on the
+brink of madne&#383;s. At this moment a
+&#383;trange a&#383;&#383;ociation was made by my
+imagination; I thought of Gallileo, who
+when he left the inqui&#383;ition, looked
+upwards, and cried out, "Yet it moves."
+A &#383;hower of tears, like the refre&#383;hing
+drops of heaven, relieved my parched
+&#383;ockets; they fell di&#383;regarded on the
+table; and, &#383;tamping with my foot, in an
+agony I exclaimed, "Yet I love." My
+hu&#383;band entered before I had calmed<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-148_S" id="DPg_4-148_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-148.png">148</a>]</span>
+the&#383;e tumultuous emotions, and tenderly
+took my hand. I &#383;natched it from
+him; grief and &#383;urpri&#383;e were marked
+on his countenance; I ha&#383;tily &#383;tretched
+it out again. My heart &#383;mote me, and I
+removed the tran&#383;ient mi&#383;t by an unfeigned
+endeavour to plea&#383;e him.</p>
+
+<p>A few months after, my mind grew
+calmer; and, if a treacherous imagination,
+if feelings many accidents revived,
+&#383;ometimes plunged me into melancholy,
+I often repeated with &#383;teady
+conviction, that virtue was not an
+empty name, and that, in following the
+dictates of duty, I had not bidden adieu
+to content.</p>
+
+<p>In the cour&#383;e of a few years, the
+dear object of my fonde&#383;t affection,
+&#383;aid farewel, in dying accents. Thus
+left alone, my grief became dear; and I
+did not feel &#383;olitary, becau&#383;e I thought<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-149_S" id="DPg_4-149_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-149.png">149</a>]</span>
+I might, without a crime, indulge a
+pa&#383;&#383;ion, that grew more ardent than ever
+when my imagination only pre&#383;ented
+him to my view, and re&#383;tored my former
+activity of &#383;oul which the late
+calm had rendered torpid. I &#383;eemed to
+find my&#383;elf again, to find the eccentric
+warmth that gave me identity of character.
+Rea&#383;on had governed my conduct,
+but could not change my nature;
+this voluptuous &#383;orrow was &#383;uperior to
+every gratification of &#383;en&#383;e, and death
+more firmly united our hearts.</p>
+
+<p>Alive to every human affection, I
+&#383;moothed my mothers pa&#383;&#383;age to eternity,
+and &#383;o often gave my hu&#383;band
+&#383;incere proofs of affection, he never
+&#383;uppo&#383;ed that I was actuated by a more
+fervent attachment. My melancholy,
+my uneven &#383;pirits, he attributed to my
+extreme &#383;en&#383;ibility, and loved me the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-150_S" id="DPg_4-150_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-150.png">150</a>]</span>
+better for po&#383;&#383;e&#383;&#383;ing qualities he could
+not comprehend.</p>
+
+<p>At the clo&#383;e of a &#383;ummer's day, &#383;ome
+years after, I wandered with carele&#383;s
+&#383;teps over a pathle&#383;s common; various
+anxieties had rendered the hours which
+the &#383;un had enlightened heavy; &#383;ober
+evening came on; I wi&#383;hed to &#383;till "my
+mind, and woo lone quiet in her &#383;ilent
+walk." The &#383;cene accorded with my
+feelings; it was wild and grand; and
+the &#383;preading twilight had almo&#383;t confounded
+the di&#383;tant &#383;ea with the barren,
+blue hills that melted from my &#383;ight.
+I &#383;at down on a ri&#383;ing ground; the rays
+of the departing &#383;un illumined the horizon,
+but &#383;o indi&#383;tinctly, that I anticipated
+their total extinction. The
+death of Nature led me to a &#383;till more
+intere&#383;ting &#383;ubject, that came home to
+my bo&#383;om, the death of him I loved.<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-151_S" id="DPg_4-151_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-151.png">151</a>]</span>
+A village-bell was tolling; I li&#383;tened,
+and thought of the moment when I
+heard his interrupted breath, and felt
+the agonizing fear, that the &#383;ame &#383;ound
+would never more reach my ears, and
+that the intelligence glanced from my
+eyes, would no more be felt. The
+&#383;poiler had &#383;eized his prey; the &#383;un
+was fled, what was this world to me!
+I wandered to another, where death
+and darkne&#383;s could not enter; I pur&#383;ued
+the &#383;un beyond the mountains,
+and the &#383;oul e&#383;caped from this vale of
+tears. My reflections were tinged with
+melancholy, but they were &#383;ublime.&mdash;I
+gra&#383;ped a mighty whole, and &#383;miled
+on the king of terrors; the tie which
+bound me to my friends he could not
+break; the &#383;ame my&#383;terious knot united
+me to the &#383;ource of all goodne&#383;s and
+happine&#383;s. I had &#383;een the divinity re<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-152_S" id="DPg_4-152_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-152.png">152</a>]</span>flected
+in a face I loved; I had read
+immortal characters di&#383;played on a
+human countenance, and forgot my&#383;elf
+whil&#383;t I gazed. I could not think of
+immortality, without recollecting the
+ec&#383;tacy I felt, when my heart fir&#383;t whi&#383;pered
+to me that I was beloved; and
+again did I feel the &#383;acred tie of mutual
+affection; fervently I prayed to the father
+of mercies; and rejoiced that he
+could &#383;ee every turn of a heart, who&#383;e
+movements I could not perfectly under&#383;tand.
+My pa&#383;&#383;ion &#383;eemed a pledge
+of immortality; I did not wi&#383;h to hide
+it from the all-&#383;earching eye of heaven.
+Where indeed could I go from his pre&#383;ence?
+and, whil&#383;t it was dear to me,
+though darkne&#383;s might reign during
+the night of life, joy would come when
+I awoke to life everla&#383;ting.</p>
+
+<p>I now turned my &#383;tep towards home,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-153_S" id="DPg_4-153_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-153.png">153</a>]</span>
+when the appearance of a girl, who
+&#383;tood weeping on the common, attracted
+my attention. I acco&#383;ted her,
+and &#383;oon heard her &#383;imple tale; that her
+father was gone to &#383;ea, and her mother
+&#383;ick in bed. I followed her to their
+little dwelling, and relieved the &#383;ick
+wretch. I then again &#383;ought my own
+abode; but death did not now haunt
+my fancy. Contriving to give the poor
+creature I had left more effectual relief,
+I reached my own garden-gate very
+weary, and re&#383;ted on it.&mdash;Recollecting
+the turns of my mind during the walk,
+I exclaimed, Surely life may thus be
+enlivened by active benevolence, and
+the &#383;leep of death, like that I am now
+di&#383;po&#383;ed to fall into, may be &#383;weet!</p>
+
+<p>My life was now unmarked by any
+extraordinary change, and a few days<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-154_S" id="DPg_4-154_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-154.png">154</a>]</span>
+ago I entered this cavern; for through
+it every mortal mu&#383;t pa&#383;s; and here I
+have di&#383;covered, that I neglected many
+opportunities of being u&#383;eful, whil&#383;t I
+fo&#383;tered a devouring flame. Remor&#383;e
+has not reached me, becau&#383;e I firmly
+adhered to my principles, and I have
+al&#383;o di&#383;covered that I &#383;aw through a
+fal&#383;e medium. Worthy as the mortal
+was I adored, I &#383;hould not long have
+loved him with the ardour I did, had
+fate united us, and broken the delu&#383;ion
+the imagination &#383;o artfully wove. His
+virtues, as they now do, would have
+extorted my e&#383;teem; but he who formed
+the human &#383;oul, only can fill it, and the
+chief happine&#383;s of an immortal being
+mu&#383;t ari&#383;e from the &#383;ame &#383;ource as its
+exi&#383;tence. Earthly love leads to heavenly,
+and prepares us for a more ex<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-155_S" id="DPg_4-155_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-155.png">155</a>]</span>alted
+&#383;tate; if it does not change its
+nature, and de&#383;troy it&#383;elf, by trampling
+on the virtue, that con&#383;titutes its e&#383;&#383;ence,
+and allies us to the Deity.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-156_S" id="DPg_4-156_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-156.png">156</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-157_S" id="DPg_4-157_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-157.png">157</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h4><a name="ON_S" id="DON_S"></a>ON</h4>
+
+<h2>POETRY,</h2>
+
+<h4>AND</h4>
+
+<h3>OUR RELISH FOR THE BEAUTIES OF NATURE.</h3>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-158_S" id="DPg_4-158_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-158.png">158</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-159_S" id="DPg_4-159_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-159.png">159</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h3>ON</h3>
+
+<h2>POETRY, &amp;c.</h2>
+<hr class="short" />
+<p><span class="smcap">A ta&#383;te</span> for rural &#383;cenes, in the
+pre&#383;ent &#383;tate of &#383;ociety, appears to be
+very often an artificial &#383;entiment, rather
+in&#383;pired by poetry and romances,
+than a real perception of the beauties
+of nature. But, as it is reckoned a
+proof of refined ta&#383;te to prai&#383;e the calm
+plea&#383;ures which the country affords, the
+theme is never exhau&#383;ted. Yet it may
+be made a que&#383;tion, whether this ro<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-160_S" id="DPg_4-160_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-160.png">160</a>]</span>mantic
+kind of declamation, has much
+effect on the conduct of tho&#383;e, who
+leave, for a &#383;ea&#383;on, the crowded cities
+in which they were bred.</p>
+
+<p>I have been led to the&#383;e reflections,
+by ob&#383;erving, when I have re&#383;ided for
+any length of time in the country, how
+few people &#383;eem to contemplate nature
+with their own eyes. I have "bru&#383;hed
+the dew away" in the morning; but,
+pacing over the printle&#383;s gra&#383;s, I have
+wondered that, in &#383;uch delightful &#383;ituations,
+the &#383;un was allowed to ri&#383;e in
+&#383;olitary maje&#383;ty, whil&#383;t my eyes alone
+hailed its beautifying beams. The
+webs of the evening have &#383;till been
+&#383;pread acro&#383;s the hedged path, unle&#383;s
+&#383;ome labouring man, trudging to work,
+di&#383;turbed the fairy &#383;tructure; yet, in
+&#383;pite of this &#383;upinene&#383;s, when I joined<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-161_S" id="DPg_4-161_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-161.png">161</a>]</span>
+the &#383;ocial circle, every tongue rang
+changes on the plea&#383;ures of the country.</p>
+
+<p>Having frequently had occa&#383;ion to
+make the &#383;ame ob&#383;ervation, I was led to
+endeavour, in one of my &#383;olitary rambles,
+to trace the cau&#383;e, and likewi&#383;e
+to enquire why the poetry written in
+the infancy of &#383;ociety, is mo&#383;t natural:
+which, &#383;trictly &#383;peaking (for <i>natural</i>
+is a very indefinite expre&#383;&#383;ion) is merely
+to &#383;ay, that it is the tran&#383;cript of immediate
+&#383;en&#383;ations, in all their native
+wildne&#383;s and &#383;implicity, when fancy,
+awakened by the &#383;ight of intere&#383;ting
+objects, was mo&#383;t actively at work.
+At &#383;uch moments, &#383;en&#383;ibility quickly
+furni&#383;hes &#383;imiles, and the &#383;ublimated
+&#383;pirits combine images, which ri&#383;ing
+&#383;pontaneou&#383;ly, it is not nece&#383;&#383;ary coldly
+to ran&#383;ack the under&#383;tanding or memory,
+till the laborious efforts of judg<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-162_S" id="DPg_4-162_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-162.png">162</a>]</span>ment
+exclude pre&#383;ent &#383;en&#383;ations, and
+damp the fire of enthu&#383;ia&#383;m.</p>
+
+<p>The effu&#383;ions of a vigorous mind, will
+ever tell us how far the under&#383;tanding
+has been enlarged by thought, and
+&#383;tored with knowledge. The richne&#383;s
+of the &#383;oil even appears on the &#383;urface;
+and the re&#383;ult of profound thinking,
+often mixing, with playful grace, in the
+reveries of the poet, &#383;moothly incorporates
+with the ebullitions of animal
+&#383;pirits, when the finely fa&#383;hioned nerve
+vibrates acutely with rapture, or when,
+relaxed by &#383;oft melancholy, a plea&#383;ing
+languor prompts the long-drawn &#383;igh,
+and feeds the &#383;lowly falling tear.</p>
+
+<p>The poet, the man of &#383;trong feelings,
+gives us only an image of his mind,
+when he was actually alone, conver&#383;ing
+with him&#383;elf, and marking the impre&#383;&#383;ion
+which nature had made on his<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-163_S" id="DPg_4-163_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-163.png">163</a>]</span>
+own heart.&mdash;If, at this &#383;acred moment,
+the idea of &#383;ome departed friend, &#383;ome
+tender recollection when the &#383;oul was
+mo&#383;t alive to tenderne&#383;s, intruded unawares
+into his thoughts, the &#383;orrow
+which it produced is artle&#383;&#383;ly, yet poetically
+expre&#383;&#383;ed&mdash;and who can avoid
+&#383;ympathizing?</p>
+
+<p>Love to man leads to devotion&mdash;grand
+and &#383;ublime images &#383;trike the
+imagination&mdash;God is &#383;een in every
+floating cloud, and comes from the
+mi&#383;ty mountain to receive the noble&#383;t
+homage of an intelligent creature&mdash;prai&#383;e.
+How &#383;olemn is the moment,
+when all affections and remembrances
+fade before the &#383;ublime admiration
+which the wi&#383;dom and goodne&#383;s of God
+in&#383;pires, when he is wor&#383;hipped in a
+<i>temple not made with hands</i>, and the
+world &#383;eems to contain only the mind<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-164_S" id="DPg_4-164_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-164.png">164</a>]</span>
+that formed, and the mind that contemplates
+it! The&#383;e are not the weak
+re&#383;pon&#383;es of ceremonial devotion; nor,
+to expre&#383;s them, would the poet need
+another poet's aid: his heart burns
+within him, and he &#383;peaks the language
+of truth and nature with re&#383;i&#383;tle&#383;s
+energy.</p>
+
+<p>Inequalities, of cour&#383;e, are ob&#383;ervable
+in his effu&#383;ions; and a le&#383;s vigorous
+fancy, with more ta&#383;te, would
+have produced more elegance and uniformity;
+but, as pa&#383;&#383;ages are &#383;oftened
+or expunged during the cooler moments
+of reflection, the under&#383;tanding
+is gratified at the expence of tho&#383;e involuntary
+&#383;en&#383;ations, which, like the
+beauteous tints of an evening &#383;ky, are
+&#383;o evane&#383;cent, that they melt into new
+forms before they can be analyzed. For
+however eloquently we may boa&#383;t of<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-165_S" id="DPg_4-165_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-165.png">165</a>]</span>
+our rea&#383;on, man mu&#383;t often be delighted
+he cannot tell why, or his blunt
+feelings are not made to reli&#383;h the beauties
+which nature, poetry, or any of
+the imitative arts, afford.</p>
+
+<p>The imagery of the ancients &#383;eems
+naturally to have been borrowed from
+&#383;urrounding objects and their mythology.
+When a hero is to be tran&#383;ported
+from one place to another, acro&#383;s
+pathle&#383;s wa&#383;tes, is any vehicle &#383;o natural,
+as one of the fleecy clouds on which
+the poet has often gazed, &#383;carcely con&#383;cious
+that he wi&#383;hed to make it his
+chariot? Again, when nature &#383;eems
+to pre&#383;ent ob&#383;tacles to his progre&#383;s at
+almo&#383;t every &#383;tep, when the tangled
+fore&#383;t and &#383;teep mountain &#383;tand as barriers,
+to pa&#383;s over which the mind
+longs for &#383;upernatural aid; an interpo&#383;ing
+deity, who walks on the waves,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-166_S" id="DPg_4-166_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-166.png">166</a>]</span>
+and rules the &#383;torm, &#383;everely felt in the
+fir&#383;t attempts to cultivate a country,
+will receive from the impa&#383;&#383;ioned fancy
+"a local habitation and a name."</p>
+
+<p>It would be a philo&#383;ophical enquiry,
+and throw &#383;ome light on the hi&#383;tory of
+the human mind, to trace, as far as our
+information will allow us to trace, the
+&#383;pontaneous feelings and ideas which
+have produced the images that now
+frequently appear unnatural, becau&#383;e
+they are remote; and di&#383;gu&#383;ting, becau&#383;e
+they have been &#383;ervilely copied
+by poets, who&#383;e habits of thinking,
+and views of nature mu&#383;t have been
+different; for, though the under&#383;tanding
+&#383;eldom di&#383;turbs the current of our pre&#383;ent
+feelings, without di&#383;&#383;ipating the
+gay clouds which fancy has been embracing,
+yet it &#383;ilently gives the colour
+to the whole tenour of them, and the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-167_S" id="DPg_4-167_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-167.png">167</a>]</span>
+dream is over, when truth is gro&#383;&#383;ly
+violated, or images introduced, &#383;elected
+from books, and not from local manners
+or popular prejudices.</p>
+
+<p>In a more advanced &#383;tate of civilization,
+a poet is rather the creature of
+art, than of nature. The books that he
+reads in his youth, become a hot-bed
+in which artificial fruits are produced,
+beautiful to the common eye, though
+they want the true hue and flavour.
+His images do not ari&#383;e from &#383;en&#383;ations;
+they are copies; and, like the works
+of the painters who copy ancient &#383;tatues
+when they draw men and women
+of their own times, we acknowledge
+that the features are fine, and the proportions
+ju&#383;t; yet they are men of
+&#383;tone; in&#383;ipid figures, that never convey
+to the mind the idea of a portrait
+taken from life, where the &#383;oul gives<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-168_S" id="DPg_4-168_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-168.png">168</a>]</span>
+&#383;pirit and homogeneity to the whole.
+The &#383;ilken wings of fancy are &#383;hrivelled
+by rules; and a de&#383;ire of attaining
+elegance of diction, occa&#383;ions an attention
+to words, incompatible with
+&#383;ublime, impa&#383;&#383;ioned thoughts.</p>
+
+<p>A boy of abilities, who has been
+taught the &#383;tructure of ver&#383;e at &#383;chool,
+and been rou&#383;ed by emulation to compo&#383;e
+rhymes whil&#383;t he was reading
+works of genius, may, by practice,
+produce pretty ver&#383;es, and even become
+what is often termed an elegant
+poet: yet his readers, without knowing
+what to find fault with, do not
+find them&#383;elves warmly intere&#383;ted. In
+the works of the poets who fa&#383;ten on
+their affections, they &#383;ee gro&#383;&#383;er faults,
+and the very images which &#383;hock their
+ta&#383;te in the modern; &#383;till they do not appear
+as puerile or extrin&#383;ic in one as the<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-169_S" id="DPg_4-169_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-169.png">169</a>]</span>
+other.&mdash;Why?&mdash;becau&#383;e they did not
+appear &#383;o to the author.</p>
+
+<p>It may &#383;ound paradoxical, after ob&#383;erving
+that tho&#383;e productions want
+vigour, that are merely the work of
+imitation, in which the under&#383;tanding
+has violently directed, if not extingui&#383;hed,
+the blaze of fancy, to a&#383;&#383;ert, that,
+though genius be only another word
+for exqui&#383;ite &#383;en&#383;ibility, the fir&#383;t ob&#383;ervers
+of nature, the true poets, exerci&#383;ed
+their under&#383;tanding much more
+than their imitators. But they exerci&#383;ed
+it to di&#383;criminate things, whil&#383;t
+their followers were bu&#383;y to borrow
+&#383;entiments and arrange words.</p>
+
+<p>Boys who have received a cla&#383;&#383;ical
+education, load their memory with
+words, and the corre&#383;pondent ideas
+are perhaps never di&#383;tinctly comprehended.
+As a proof of this a&#383;&#383;ertion,<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-170_S" id="DPg_4-170_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-170.png">170</a>]</span>
+I mu&#383;t ob&#383;erve, that I have known
+many young people who could write
+tolerably &#383;mooth ver&#383;es, and &#383;tring epithets
+prettily together, when their
+pro&#383;e themes &#383;howed the barrenne&#383;s of
+their minds, and how &#383;uperficial the
+cultivation mu&#383;t have been, which
+their under&#383;tanding had received.</p>
+
+<p>Dr. John&#383;on, I know, has given a definition
+of genius, which would overturn
+my rea&#383;oning, if I were to admit
+it.&mdash;He imagines, that <i>a &#383;trong mind,
+accidentally led to &#383;ome particular &#383;tudy</i> in
+which it excels, is a genius.&mdash;Not to
+&#383;top to inve&#383;tigate the cau&#383;es which
+produced this happy <i>&#383;trength</i> of mind,
+experience &#383;eems to prove, that tho&#383;e
+minds have appeared mo&#383;t vigorous,
+that have pur&#383;ued a &#383;tudy, after nature
+had di&#383;covered a bent; for it would be
+ab&#383;urd to &#383;uppo&#383;e, that a &#383;light impre&#383;<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-171_S" id="DPg_4-171_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-171.png">171</a>]</span>&#383;ion
+made on the weak faculties of a
+boy, is the fiat of fate, and not to be
+effaced by any &#383;ucceeding impre&#383;&#383;ion,
+or unexpected difficulty. Dr. John&#383;on
+in fact, appears &#383;ometimes to be of the
+&#383;ame opinion (how con&#383;i&#383;tently I &#383;hall
+not now enquire), e&#383;pecially when he
+ob&#383;erves, "that Thom&#383;on looked on
+nature with the eye which &#383;he only
+gives to a poet."</p>
+
+<p>But, though it &#383;hould be allowed
+that books may produce &#383;ome poets, I
+fear they will never be the poets who
+charm our cares to &#383;leep, or extort admiration.
+They may diffu&#383;e ta&#383;te, and
+poli&#383;h the language; but I am inclined
+to conclude that they will &#383;eldom rou&#383;e
+the pa&#383;&#383;ions, or amend the heart.</p>
+
+<p>And, to return to the fir&#383;t &#383;ubject of
+di&#383;cu&#383;&#383;ion, the rea&#383;on why mo&#383;t people
+are more intere&#383;ted by a &#383;cene de&#383;crib<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-172_S" id="DPg_4-172_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-172.png">172</a>]</span>ed
+by a poet, than by a view of nature,
+probably ari&#383;es from the want of a
+lively imagination. The poet contracts
+the pro&#383;pect, and, &#383;electing the mo&#383;t
+picture&#383;que part in his <i>camera</i>, the judgment
+is directed, and the whole force
+of the languid faculty turned towards
+the objects which excited the mo&#383;t
+forcible emotions in the poet's heart;
+the reader con&#383;equently feels the enlivened
+de&#383;cription, though he was not
+able to receive a fir&#383;t impre&#383;&#383;ion from
+the operations of his own mind.</p>
+
+<p>Be&#383;ides, it may be further ob&#383;erved,
+that gro&#383;s minds are only to be moved
+by forcible repre&#383;entations. To rou&#383;e
+the thoughtle&#383;s, objects mu&#383;t be pre&#383;ented,
+calculated to produce tumultuous
+emotions; the un&#383;ub&#383;tantial, picture&#383;que
+forms which a contemplative
+man gazes on, and often follows with<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-173_S" id="DPg_4-173_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-173.png">173</a>]</span>
+ardour till he is mocked by a glimp&#383;e
+of unattainable excellence, appear to
+them the light vapours of a dreaming
+enthu&#383;ia&#383;t, who gives up the &#383;ub&#383;tance
+for the &#383;hadow. It is not within that
+they &#383;eek amu&#383;ement; their eyes are
+&#383;eldom turned on them&#383;elves; con&#383;equently
+their emotions, though &#383;ometimes
+fervid, are always tran&#383;ient, and
+the nicer perceptions which di&#383;tingui&#383;h
+the man of genuine ta&#383;te, are not felt,
+or make &#383;uch a &#383;light impre&#383;&#383;ion as
+&#383;carcely to excite any plea&#383;urable &#383;en&#383;ations.
+Is it &#383;urpri&#383;ing then that they
+are often overlooked, even by tho&#383;e
+who are delighted by the &#383;ame images
+concentrated by the poet?</p>
+
+<p>But even this numerous cla&#383;s is exceeded,
+by witlings, who, anxious
+to appear to have wit and ta&#383;te, do
+not allow their under&#383;tandings or feel<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-174_S" id="DPg_4-174_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-174.png">174</a>]</span>ings
+any liberty; for, in&#383;tead of cultivating
+their faculties and reflecting on
+their operations, they are bu&#383;y collecting
+prejudices; and are predetermined
+to admire what the &#383;uffrage of time
+announces as excellent, not to &#383;tore up
+a fund of amu&#383;ement for them&#383;elves,
+but to enable them to talk.</p>
+
+<p>The&#383;e hints will a&#383;&#383;i&#383;t the reader to
+trace &#383;ome of the cau&#383;es why the beauties
+of nature are not forcibly felt,
+when civilization, or rather luxury,
+has made con&#383;iderable advances&mdash;tho&#383;e
+calm &#383;en&#383;ations are not &#383;ufficiently
+lively to &#383;erve as a relaxation to the voluptuary,
+or even to the moderate pur&#383;uer
+of artificial plea&#383;ures. In the pre&#383;ent
+&#383;tate of &#383;ociety, the under&#383;tanding
+mu&#383;t bring back the feelings to nature,
+or the &#383;en&#383;ibility mu&#383;t have &#383;uch native
+&#383;trength, as rather to be whetted than<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-175_S" id="DPg_4-175_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-175.png">175</a>]</span>
+de&#383;troyed by the &#383;trong exerci&#383;es of
+pa&#383;&#383;ion.</p>
+
+<p>That the mo&#383;t valuable things are liable
+to the greate&#383;t perver&#383;ion, is however
+as trite as true:&mdash;for the &#383;ame &#383;en&#383;ibility,
+or quickne&#383;s of &#383;en&#383;es, which
+makes a man reli&#383;h the tranquil &#383;cenes
+of nature, when &#383;en&#383;ation, rather than
+rea&#383;on, imparts delight, frequently makes
+a libertine of him, by leading him to
+prefer the &#383;en&#383;ual tumult of love a
+little refined by &#383;entiment, to the calm
+plea&#383;ures of affectionate friend&#383;hip, in
+who&#383;e &#383;ober &#383;ati&#383;factions, rea&#383;on, mixing
+her tranquillizing convictions, whi&#383;pers,
+that content, not happine&#383;s, is the
+reward of virtue in this world.</p>
+
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-176_S" id="DPg_4-176_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-176.png">176</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr class="full" />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-177_S" id="DPg_4-177_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-177.png">177</a>]</span></p>
+<h2><a name="HINTS_S" id="DHINTS_S"></a>HINTS.</h2>
+
+<h3>[<i>Chiefly de&#383;igned to have been incorporated<br />
+in the Second Part of the</i> Vindication<br />
+of the Rights of Woman.]</h3>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-178_S" id="DPg_4-178_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-178.png">178</a>]</span></p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<hr />
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-179_S" id="DPg_4-179_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-179.png">179</a>]</span></p>
+
+<h2>HINTS.</h2>
+
+<hr class="short" />
+<p class="center">1.</p>
+<p><span class="smcap">Indolence</span> is the &#383;ource of nervous
+complaints, and a whole ho&#383;t of
+cares. This devil might &#383;ay that his
+name was legion.</p>
+
+<p class="center">2.</p>
+<p>It &#383;hould be one of the employments
+of women of fortune, to vi&#383;it ho&#383;pitals,
+and &#383;uperintend the conduct of inferiors.</p>
+
+<p class="center">3.</p>
+<p>It is generally &#383;uppo&#383;ed, that the
+imagination of women is particularly<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-180_S" id="DPg_4-180_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-180.png">180</a>]</span>
+active, and leads them a&#383;tray. Why
+then do we &#383;eek by education only to
+exerci&#383;e their imagination and feeling,
+till the under&#383;tanding, grown rigid by
+di&#383;u&#383;e, is unable to exerci&#383;e it&#383;elf&mdash;and
+the &#383;uperfluous nouri&#383;hment the
+imagination and feeling have received,
+renders the former romantic, and the
+latter weak?</p>
+
+<p class="center">4.</p>
+<p>Few men have ri&#383;en to any great
+eminence in learning, who have not
+received &#383;omething like a regular education.
+Why are women expected to
+&#383;urmount difficulties that men are not
+equal to?</p>
+
+<p class="center">5.</p>
+<p>Nothing can be more ab&#383;urd than
+the ridicule of the critic, that the heroine
+of his mock-tragedy was in love
+with the very man whom &#383;he ought<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-181_S" id="DPg_4-181_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-181.png">181</a>]</span>
+lea&#383;t to have loved; he could not have
+given a better rea&#383;on. How can pa&#383;&#383;ion
+gain &#383;trength any other way? In Otaheite,
+love cannot be known, where
+the ob&#383;tacles to irritate an indi&#383;criminate
+appetite, and &#383;ublimate the &#383;imple
+&#383;en&#383;ations of de&#383;ire till they mount to
+pa&#383;&#383;ion, are never known. There a
+man or woman cannot love the very
+per&#383;on they ought not to have loved&mdash;nor
+does jealou&#383;y ever fan the flame.</p>
+
+<p class="center">6.</p>
+<p>It has frequently been ob&#383;erved, that,
+when women have an object in view,
+they pur&#383;ue it with more &#383;teadine&#383;s than
+men, particularly love. This is not
+a compliment. Pa&#383;&#383;ion pur&#383;ues with
+more heat than rea&#383;on, and with mo&#383;t
+ardour during the ab&#383;ence of rea&#383;on.</p>
+
+<p class="center">7.</p>
+<p>Men are more &#383;ubject to the phy&#383;ical<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-182_S" id="DPg_4-182_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-182.png">182</a>]</span>
+love than women. The confined education
+of women makes them more
+&#383;ubject to jealou&#383;y.</p>
+
+<p class="center">8.</p>
+<p>Simplicity &#383;eems, in general, the con&#383;equence
+of ignorance, as I have ob&#383;erved
+in the characters of women and
+&#383;ailors&mdash;the being confined to one track
+of impre&#383;&#383;ions.</p>
+
+<p class="center">9.</p>
+<p>I know of no other way of pre&#383;erving
+the cha&#383;tity of mankind, than that
+of rendering women rather objects of
+love than de&#383;ire. The difference is
+great. Yet, while women are encouraged
+to ornament their per&#383;ons at the
+expence of their minds, while indolence
+renders them helple&#383;s and la&#383;civious
+(for what other name can be
+given to the common intercour&#383;e between
+the &#383;exes?) they will be, gene<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-183_S" id="DPg_4-183_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-183.png">183</a>]</span>rally
+&#383;peaking, only objects of de&#383;ire;
+and, to &#383;uch women, men cannot be
+con&#383;tant. Men, accu&#383;tomed only to
+have their &#383;en&#383;es moved, merely &#383;eek
+for a &#383;elfi&#383;h gratification in the &#383;ociety
+of women, and their &#383;exual in&#383;tinct,
+being neither &#383;upported by the under&#383;tanding
+nor the heart, mu&#383;t be excited
+by variety.</p>
+
+<p class="center">10.</p>
+<p>We ought to re&#383;pect old opinions;
+though prejudices, blindly adopted,
+lead to error, and preclude all exerci&#383;e
+of the rea&#383;on.</p>
+
+<p>The emulation which often makes a
+boy mi&#383;chievous, is a generous &#383;pur;
+and the old remark, that unlucky, turbulent
+boys, make the wi&#383;e&#383;t and be&#383;t
+men, is true, &#383;pite of Mr. Knox's arguments.
+It has been ob&#383;erved, that the
+mo&#383;t adventurous hor&#383;es, when tamed<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-184_S" id="DPg_4-184_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-184.png">184</a>]</span>
+or dome&#383;ticated, are the mo&#383;t mild and
+tractable.</p>
+
+<p class="center">11.</p>
+<p>The children who &#383;tart up &#383;uddenly
+at twelve or fourteen, and fall into decays,
+in con&#383;equence, as it is termed,
+of outgrowing their &#383;trength, are in
+general, I believe, tho&#383;e children, who
+have been bred up with mi&#383;taken tenderne&#383;s,
+and not allowed to &#383;port and
+take exerci&#383;e in the open air. This is
+analogous to plants: for it is found that
+they run up &#383;ickly, long &#383;talks, when
+confined.</p>
+
+<p class="center">12.</p>
+<p>Children &#383;hould be taught to feel deference,
+not to practi&#383;e &#383;ubmi&#383;&#383;ion.</p>
+
+<p class="center">13.</p>
+<p>It is always a proof of fal&#383;e refinement,
+when a fa&#383;tidious ta&#383;te overpowers
+&#383;ympathy.</p>
+
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-185_S" id="DPg_4-185_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-185.png">185</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">14.</p>
+<p>Lu&#383;t appears to be the mo&#383;t natural
+companion of wild ambition; and love
+of human prai&#383;e, of that dominion
+erected by cunning.</p>
+
+<p class="center">15.</p>
+<p>"Genius decays as judgment increa&#383;es."
+Of cour&#383;e, tho&#383;e who have
+the lea&#383;t genius, have the earlie&#383;t appearance
+of wi&#383;dom.</p>
+
+<p class="center">16.</p>
+<p>A knowledge of the fine arts, is &#383;eldom
+&#383;ub&#383;ervient to the promotion of
+either religion or virtue. Elegance is
+often indecency; witne&#383;s our prints.</p>
+
+<p class="center">17.</p>
+<p>There does not appear to be any evil
+in the world, but what is nece&#383;&#383;ary.
+The doctrine of rewards and puni&#383;hments,
+not con&#383;idered as a means of re<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-186_S" id="DPg_4-186_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-186.png">186</a>]</span>formation,
+appears to me an infamous
+libel on divine goodne&#383;s.</p>
+
+<p class="center">18.</p>
+<p>Whether virtue is founded on rea&#383;on
+or revelation, virtue is wi&#383;dom, and
+vice is folly. Why are po&#383;itive puni&#383;hments?</p>
+
+<p class="center">19.</p>
+<p>Few can walk alone. The &#383;taff of
+Chri&#383;tianity is the nece&#383;&#383;ary &#383;upport of
+human weakne&#383;s. But an acquaintance
+with the nature of man and virtue,
+with ju&#383;t &#383;entiments on the attributes,
+would be &#383;ufficient, without a voice
+from heaven, to lead &#383;ome to virtue,
+but not the mob.</p>
+
+<p class="center">20.</p>
+<p>I only expect the natural reward of
+virtue, whatever it may be. I rely not
+on a po&#383;itive reward.</p>
+
+<p>The ju&#383;tice of God can be vindicated<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-187_S" id="DPg_4-187_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-187.png">187</a>]</span>
+by a belief in a future &#383;tate&mdash;but a continuation
+of being vindicates it as
+clearly, as the po&#383;itive &#383;y&#383;tem of rewards
+and puni&#383;hments&mdash;by evil educing
+good for the individual, and not
+for an imaginary whole. The happine&#383;s
+of the whole mu&#383;t ari&#383;e from the
+happine&#383;s of the con&#383;tituent parts, or
+this world is not a &#383;tate of trial, but a
+&#383;chool.</p>
+
+<p class="center">21.</p>
+<p>The vices acquired by Augu&#383;tus to
+retain his power, mu&#383;t have tainted his
+&#383;oul, and prevented that increa&#383;e of
+happine&#383;s a good man expects in the
+next &#383;tage of exi&#383;tence. This was a
+natural puni&#383;hment.</p>
+
+<p class="center">22.</p>
+<p>The lover is ever mo&#383;t deeply enamoured,
+when it is with he knows
+not what&mdash;and the devotion of a my&#383;tic<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-188_S" id="DPg_4-188_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-188.png">188</a>]</span>
+has a rude Gothic grandeur in it, which
+the re&#383;pectful adoration of a philo&#383;opher
+will never reach. I may be
+thought fanciful; but it has continually
+occurred to me, that, though, I allow,
+rea&#383;on in this world is the mother
+of wi&#383;dom&mdash;yet &#383;ome flights of the imagination
+&#383;eem to reach what wi&#383;dom
+cannot teach&mdash;and, while they delude
+us here, afford a glorious hope, if not
+a foreta&#383;te, of what we may expect
+hereafter. He that created us, did not
+mean to mark us with ideal images of
+grandeur, the <i>ba&#383;ele&#383;s fabric of a vi&#383;ion</i>&mdash;No&mdash;that
+perfection we follow with
+hopele&#383;s ardour when the whi&#383;perings
+of rea&#383;on are heard, may be found,
+when not incompatible with our &#383;tate,
+in the round of eternity. Perfection
+indeed mu&#383;t, even then, be a comparative
+idea&mdash;but the wi&#383;dom, the hap<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-189_S" id="DPg_4-189_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-189.png">189</a>]</span>pine&#383;s
+of a &#383;uperior &#383;tate, has been &#383;uppo&#383;ed
+to be intuitive, and the happie&#383;t
+effu&#383;ions of human genius have &#383;eemed
+like in&#383;piration&mdash;the deductions of rea&#383;on
+de&#383;troy &#383;ublimity.</p>
+
+<p class="center">23.</p>
+<p>I am more and more convinced, that
+poetry is the fir&#383;t efferve&#383;cence of the
+imagination, and the forerunner of civilization.</p>
+
+<p class="center">24.</p>
+<p>When the Arabs had no trace of literature
+or &#383;cience, they compo&#383;ed
+beautiful ver&#383;es on the &#383;ubjects of love
+and war. The flights of the imagination,
+and the laboured deductions of
+rea&#383;on, appear almo&#383;t incompatible.</p>
+
+<p class="center">25.</p>
+<p>Poetry certainly flouri&#383;hes mo&#383;t in
+the fir&#383;t rude &#383;tate of &#383;ociety. The
+pa&#383;&#383;ions &#383;peak mo&#383;t eloquently, when
+they are not &#383;hackled by rea&#383;on. The<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-190_S" id="DPg_4-190_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-190.png">190</a>]</span>
+&#383;ublime expre&#383;&#383;ion, which has been &#383;o
+often quoted, [Gene&#383;is, ch. 1, ver. 3.]
+is perhaps a barbarous flight; or rather
+the grand conception of an uncultivated
+mind; for it is contrary to nature
+and experience, to &#383;uppo&#383;e that this
+account is founded on facts&mdash;It is
+doubtle&#383;s a &#383;ublime allegory. But a
+cultivated mind would not thus have
+de&#383;cribed the creation&mdash;for, arguing
+from analogy, it appears that creation
+mu&#383;t have been a comprehen&#383;ive plan,
+and that the Supreme Being always
+u&#383;es &#383;econd cau&#383;es, &#383;lowly and &#383;ilently
+to fulfil his purpo&#383;e. This is, in reality,
+a more &#383;ublime view of that power
+which wi&#383;dom &#383;upports: but it is not
+the &#383;ublimity that would &#383;trike the impa&#383;&#383;ioned
+mind, in which the imagination
+took place of intellect. Tell a
+being, who&#383;e affections and pa&#383;&#383;ions
+have been more exerci&#383;ed than his rea<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-191_S" id="DPg_4-191_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-191.png">191</a>]</span>&#383;on,
+that God &#383;aid, <i>Let there be light!
+and there was light</i>; and he would pro&#383;trate
+him&#383;elf before the Being who
+could thus call things out of nothing,
+as if they were: but a man in whom
+rea&#383;on had taken place of pa&#383;&#383;ion,
+would not adore, till wi&#383;dom was con&#383;picuous
+as well as power, for his admiration
+mu&#383;t be founded on principle.</p>
+
+<p class="center">26.</p>
+<p>Individuality is ever con&#383;picuous in
+tho&#383;e enthu&#383;ia&#383;tic flights of fancy, in
+which rea&#383;on is left behind, without
+being lo&#383;t &#383;ight of.</p>
+
+<p class="center">27.</p>
+<p>The mind has been too often brought
+to the te&#383;t of enquiries which only
+reach to matter&mdash;put into the crucible,
+though the magnetic and electric fluid
+e&#383;capes from the experimental philo&#383;opher.</p>
+<p><span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-192_S" id="DPg_4-192_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-192.png">192</a>]</span></p>
+<p class="center">28.</p>
+<p>Mr. Kant has ob&#383;erved, that the under&#383;tanding
+is &#383;ublime, the imagination
+beautiful&mdash;yet it is evident, that poets,
+and men who undoubtedly po&#383;&#383;e&#383;s the
+livelie&#383;t imagination, are mo&#383;t touched
+by the &#383;ublime, while men who have
+cold, enquiring minds, have not this
+exqui&#383;ite feeling in any great degree,
+and indeed &#383;eem to lo&#383;e it as they cultivate
+their rea&#383;on.</p>
+
+<p class="center">29.</p>
+<p>The Grecian buildings are graceful&mdash;they
+fill the mind with all tho&#383;e plea&#383;ing
+emotions, which elegance and beauty
+never fail to excite in a cultivated
+mind&mdash;utility and grace &#383;trike us in
+uni&#383;on&mdash;the mind is &#383;ati&#383;fied&mdash;things
+appear ju&#383;t what they ought to be: a
+calm &#383;ati&#383;faction is felt, but the imagination
+has nothing to do&mdash;no ob&#383;curity<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-193_S" id="DPg_4-193_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-193.png">193</a>]</span>
+darkens the gloom&mdash;like rea&#383;onable
+content, we can &#383;ay why we are plea&#383;ed&mdash;and
+this kind of plea&#383;ure may be
+la&#383;ting, but it is never great.</p>
+
+<p class="center">30.</p>
+<p>When we &#383;ay that a per&#383;on is an
+original, it is only to &#383;ay in other words
+that he thinks. "The le&#383;s a man has
+cultivated his rational faculties, the
+more powerful is the principle of
+imitation, over his actions, and his
+habits of thinking. Mo&#383;t women,
+of cour&#383;e, are more influenced by
+the behaviour, the fa&#383;hions, and the
+opinions of tho&#383;e with whom they
+a&#383;&#383;ociate, than men." (Smellie.)</p>
+
+<p>When we read a book which &#383;upports
+our favourite opinions, how eagerly
+do we &#383;uck in the doctrines, and
+&#383;uffer our minds placidly to reflect the
+images which illu&#383;trate the tenets we<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-194_S" id="DPg_4-194_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-194.png">194</a>]</span>
+have embraced? We indolently or
+quietly acquie&#383;ce in the conclu&#383;ion, and
+our &#383;pirit animates and connects the
+various &#383;ubjects. But, on the contrary,
+when we peru&#383;e a &#383;kilful writer,
+who does not coincide in opinion with
+us, how is the mind on the watch to
+detect fallacy? And this coolne&#383;s often
+prevents our being carried away by a
+&#383;tream of eloquence, which the prejudiced
+mind terms declamation&mdash;a pomp
+of words.&mdash;We never allow our&#383;elves to
+be warmed; and, after contending
+with the writer, are more confirmed
+in our own opinion, as much perhaps
+from a &#383;pirit of contradiction as from
+rea&#383;on.&mdash;Such is the &#383;trength of man!</p>
+
+<p class="center">31.</p>
+<p>It is the individual manner of &#383;eeing
+and feeling, pourtrayed by a &#383;trong
+imagination in bold images that have<span class='pagenum'><a name="DPg_4-195_S" id="DPg_4-195_S"></a>[<a href="images/v4-195.png">195</a>]</span>
+&#383;truck the &#383;en&#383;es, which creates all the
+charms of poetry. A great reader is
+always quoting the de&#383;cription of another's
+emotions; a &#383;trong imagination
+delights to paint its own. A writer of
+genius makes us feel; an inferior author
+rea&#383;on.</p>
+
+<p class="center">32.</p>
+<p>Some principle prior to &#383;elf-love mu&#383;t
+have exi&#383;ted: the feeling which produced
+the plea&#383;ure, mu&#383;t have exi&#383;ted
+before the experience.</p>
+
+
+<h4>THE END.</h4>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft
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+</body>
+</html>
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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Posthumous Works
+       of the Author of A Vindication of the Rights of Woman
+
+Author: Mary Wollstonecraft
+
+Editor: William Godwin
+
+Release Date: October 29, 2007 [EBook #23233]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POSTHUMOUS WORKS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Jonathan Ingram, Online Distributed Proofreading
+Team at http://www.pgdp.net and the booksmiths at
+http://www.eBookForge.net
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.
+
+VOL. I.
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. I.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+THE
+
+WRONGS OF WOMAN:
+
+OR,
+
+MARIA.
+
+A FRAGMENT.
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. I.
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE.
+
+
+THE public are here presented with the last literary attempt of an
+author, whose fame has been uncommonly extensive, and whose talents have
+probably been most admired, by the persons by whom talents are estimated
+with the greatest accuracy and discrimination. There are few, to whom her
+writings could in any case have given pleasure, that would have wished
+that this fragment should have been suppressed, because it is a fragment.
+There is a sentiment, very dear to minds of taste and imagination, that
+finds a melancholy delight in contemplating these unfinished productions
+of genius, these sketches of what, if they had been filled up in a manner
+adequate to the writer's conception, would perhaps have given a new
+impulse to the manners of a world.
+
+The purpose and structure of the following work, had long formed a
+favourite subject of meditation with its author, and she judged them
+capable of producing an important effect. The composition had been in
+progress for a period of twelve months. She was anxious to do justice to
+her conception, and recommenced and revised the manuscript several
+different times. So much of it as is here given to the public, she was
+far from considering as finished, and, in a letter to a friend directly
+written on this subject, she says, "I am perfectly aware that some of the
+incidents ought to be transposed, and heightened by more harmonious
+shading; and I wished in some degree to avail myself of criticism, before
+I began to adjust my events into a story, the outline of which I had
+sketched in my mind[x-A]." The only friends to whom the author
+communicated her manuscript, were Mr. Dyson, the translator of the
+Sorcerer, and the present editor; and it was impossible for the most
+inexperienced author to display a stronger desire of profiting by the
+censures and sentiments that might be suggested[x-B].
+
+In revising these sheets for the press, it was necessary for the editor,
+in some places, to connect the more finished parts with the pages of an
+older copy, and a line or two in addition sometimes appeared requisite
+for that purpose. Wherever such a liberty has been taken, the additional
+phrases will be found inclosed in brackets; it being the editor's most
+earnest desire, to intrude nothing of himself into the work, but to give
+to the public the words, as well as ideas, of the real author.
+
+What follows in the ensuing pages, is not a preface regularly drawn out
+by the author, but merely hints for a preface, which, though never filled
+up in the manner the writer intended, appeared to be worth preserving.
+
+W. GODWIN.
+
+
+
+
+AUTHOR'S PREFACE.
+
+
+THE Wrongs of Woman, like the wrongs of the oppressed part of mankind,
+may be deemed necessary by their oppressors: but surely there are a few,
+who will dare to advance before the improvement of the age, and grant
+that my sketches are not the abortion of a distempered fancy, or the
+strong delineations of a wounded heart.
+
+In writing this novel, I have rather endeavoured to pourtray passions
+than manners.
+
+In many instances I could have made the incidents more dramatic, would I
+have sacrificed my main object, the desire of exhibiting the misery and
+oppression, peculiar to women, that arise out of the partial laws and
+customs of society.
+
+In the invention of the story, this view restrained my fancy; and the
+history ought rather to be considered, as of woman, than of an
+individual.
+
+The sentiments I have embodied.
+
+In many works of this species, the hero is allowed to be mortal, and to
+become wise and virtuous as well as happy, by a train of events and
+circumstances. The heroines, on the contrary, are to be born immaculate;
+and to act like goddesses of wisdom, just come forth highly finished
+Minervas from the head of Jove.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[The following is an extract of a letter from the author to a friend, to
+whom she communicated her manuscript.]
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+For my part, I cannot suppose any situation more distressing, than for a
+woman of sensibility, with an improving mind, to be bound to such a man
+as I have described for life; obliged to renounce all the humanizing
+affections, and to avoid cultivating her taste, lest her perception of
+grace and refinement of sentiment, should sharpen to agony the pangs of
+disappointment. Love, in which the imagination mingles its bewitching
+colouring, must be fostered by delicacy. I should despise, or rather call
+her an ordinary woman, who could endure such a husband as I have
+sketched.
+
+These appear to me (matrimonial despotism of heart and conduct) to be the
+peculiar Wrongs of Woman, because they degrade the mind. What are termed
+great misfortunes, may more forcibly impress the mind of common readers;
+they have more of what may justly be termed _stage-effect_; but it is the
+delineation of finer sensations, which, in my opinion, constitutes the
+merit of our best novels. This is what I have in view; and to show the
+wrongs of different classes of women, equally oppressive, though, from
+the difference of education, necessarily various.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[x-A] A more copious extract of this letter is subjoined to the author's
+preface.
+
+[x-B] The part communicated consisted of the first fourteen chapters.
+
+
+
+
+ERRATA.
+
+Page 3, line 2, _dele_ half.
+
+P. 81 and 118, _for_ brackets [--], _read_ inverted commas " thus "
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+VOL. I. AND II.
+
+The Wrongs of Woman, or Maria; a Fragment:
+to which is added, the First Book
+of a Series of Lessons for Children.
+
+VOL. III. AND IV.
+
+Letters and Miscellaneous Pieces.
+
+
+
+
+_WRONGS_
+
+OF
+
+WOMAN.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. I.
+
+
+ABODES of horror have frequently been described, and castles, filled with
+spectres and chimeras, conjured up by the magic spell of genius to harrow
+the soul, and absorb the wondering mind. But, formed of such stuff as
+dreams are made of, what were they to the mansion of despair, in one
+corner of which Maria sat, endeavouring to recal her scattered thoughts!
+
+Surprise, astonishment, that bordered on distraction, seemed to have
+suspended her faculties, till, waking by degrees to a keen sense of
+anguish, a whirlwind of rage and indignation roused her torpid pulse. One
+recollection with frightful velocity following another, threatened to
+fire her brain, and make her a fit companion for the terrific
+inhabitants, whose groans and shrieks were no unsubstantial sounds of
+whistling winds, or startled birds, modulated by a romantic fancy, which
+amuse while they affright; but such tones of misery as carry a dreadful
+certainty directly to the heart. What effect must they then have produced
+on one, true to the touch of sympathy, and tortured by maternal
+apprehension!
+
+Her infant's image was continually floating on Maria's sight, and the
+first smile of intelligence remembered, as none but a mother, an unhappy
+mother, can conceive. She heard her half speaking cooing, and felt the
+little twinkling fingers on her burning bosom--a bosom bursting with the
+nutriment for which this cherished child might now be pining in vain.
+From a stranger she could indeed receive the maternal aliment, Maria was
+grieved at the thought--but who would watch her with a mother's
+tenderness, a mother's self-denial?
+
+The retreating shadows of former sorrows rushed back in a gloomy train,
+and seemed to be pictured on the walls of her prison, magnified by the
+state of mind in which they were viewed--Still she mourned for her child,
+lamented she was a daughter, and anticipated the aggravated ills of life
+that her sex rendered almost inevitable, even while dreading she was no
+more. To think that she was blotted out of existence was agony, when the
+imagination had been long employed to expand her faculties; yet to
+suppose her turned adrift on an unknown sea, was scarcely less
+afflicting.
+
+After being two days the prey of impetuous, varying emotions, Maria began
+to reflect more calmly on her present situation, for she had actually
+been rendered incapable of sober reflection, by the discovery of the act
+of atrocity of which she was the victim. She could not have imagined,
+that, in all the fermentation of civilized depravity, a similar plot
+could have entered a human mind. She had been stunned by an unexpected
+blow; yet life, however joyless, was not to be indolently resigned, or
+misery endured without exertion, and proudly termed patience. She had
+hitherto meditated only to point the dart of anguish, and suppressed the
+heart heavings of indignant nature merely by the force of contempt. Now
+she endeavoured to brace her mind to fortitude, and to ask herself what
+was to be her employment in her dreary cell? Was it not to effect her
+escape, to fly to the succour of her child, and to baffle the selfish
+schemes of her tyrant--her husband?
+
+These thoughts roused her sleeping spirit, and the self-possession
+returned, that seemed to have abandoned her in the infernal solitude into
+which she had been precipitated. The first emotions of overwhelming
+impatience began to subside, and resentment gave place to tenderness, and
+more tranquil meditation; though anger once more stopt the calm current
+of reflection, when she attempted to move her manacled arms. But this
+was an outrage that could only excite momentary feelings of scorn, which
+evaporated in a faint smile; for Maria was far from thinking a personal
+insult the most difficult to endure with magnanimous indifference.
+
+She approached the small grated window of her chamber, and for a
+considerable time only regarded the blue expanse; though it commanded a
+view of a desolate garden, and of part of a huge pile of buildings, that,
+after having been suffered, for half a century, to fall to decay, had
+undergone some clumsy repairs, merely to render it habitable. The ivy had
+been torn off the turrets, and the stones not wanted to patch up the
+breaches of time, and exclude the warring elements, left in heaps in the
+disordered court. Maria contemplated this scene she knew not how long; or
+rather gazed on the walls, and pondered on her situation. To the master
+of this most horrid of prisons, she had, soon after her entrance, raved
+of injustice, in accents that would have justified his treatment, had not
+a malignant smile, when she appealed to his judgment, with a dreadful
+conviction stifled her remonstrating complaints. By force, or openly,
+what could be done? But surely some expedient might occur to an active
+mind, without any other employment, and possessed of sufficient
+resolution to put the risk of life into the balance with the chance of
+freedom.
+
+A woman entered in the midst of these reflections, with a firm,
+deliberate step, strongly marked features, and large black eyes, which
+she fixed steadily on Maria's, as if she designed to intimidate her,
+saying at the same time--"You had better sit down and eat your dinner,
+than look at the clouds."
+
+"I have no appetite," replied Maria, who had previously determined to
+speak mildly, "why then should I eat?"
+
+"But, in spite of that, you must and shall eat something. I have had many
+ladies under my care, who have resolved to starve themselves; but, soon
+or late, they gave up their intent, as they recovered their senses."
+
+"Do you really think me mad?" asked Maria, meeting the searching glance
+of her eye.
+
+"Not just now. But what does that prove?--only that you must be the more
+carefully watched, for appearing at times so reasonable. You have not
+touched a morsel since you entered the house."--Maria sighed
+intelligibly.--"Could any thing but madness produce such a disgust for
+food?"
+
+"Yes, grief; you would not ask the question if you knew what it was." The
+attendant shook her head; and a ghastly smile of desperate fortitude
+served as a forcible reply, and made Maria pause, before she added--"Yet
+I will take some refreshment: I mean not to die.--No; I will preserve my
+senses; and convince even you, sooner than you are aware of, that my
+intellects have never been disturbed, though the exertion of them may
+have been suspended by some infernal drug."
+
+Doubt gathered still thicker on the brow of her guard, as she attempted
+to convict her of mistake.
+
+"Have patience!" exclaimed Maria, with a solemnity that inspired awe. "My
+God! how have I been schooled into the practice!" A suffocation of voice
+betrayed the agonizing emotions she was labouring to keep down; and
+conquering a qualm of disgust, she calmly endeavoured to eat enough to
+prove her docility, perpetually turning to the suspicious female, whose
+observation she courted, while she was making the bed and adjusting the
+room.
+
+"Come to me often," said Maria, with a tone of persuasion, in consequence
+of a vague plan that she had hastily adopted, when, after surveying this
+woman's form and features, she felt convinced that she had an
+understanding above the common standard; "and believe me mad, till you
+are obliged to acknowledge the contrary." The woman was no fool, that is,
+she was superior to her class; nor had misery quite petrified the
+life's-blood of humanity, to which reflections on our own misfortunes
+only give a more orderly course. The manner, rather than the
+expostulations, of Maria made a slight suspicion dart into her mind with
+corresponding sympathy, which various other avocations, and the habit of
+banishing compunction, prevented her, for the present, from examining
+more minutely.
+
+But when she was told that no person, excepting the physician appointed
+by her family, was to be permitted to see the lady at the end of the
+gallery, she opened her keen eyes still wider, and uttered a--"hem!"
+before she enquired--"Why?" She was briefly told, in reply, that the
+malady was hereditary, and the fits not occurring but at very long and
+irregular intervals, she must be carefully watched; for the length of
+these lucid periods only rendered her more mischievous, when any vexation
+or caprice brought on the paroxysm of phrensy.
+
+Had her master trusted her, it is probable that neither pity nor
+curiosity would have made her swerve from the straight line of her
+interest; for she had suffered too much in her intercourse with mankind,
+not to determine to look for support, rather to humouring their passions,
+than courting their approbation by the integrity of her conduct. A deadly
+blight had met her at the very threshold of existence; and the
+wretchedness of her mother seemed a heavy weight fastened on her innocent
+neck, to drag her down to perdition. She could not heroically determine
+to succour an unfortunate; but, offended at the bare supposition that she
+could be deceived with the same ease as a common servant, she no longer
+curbed her curiosity; and, though she never seriously fathomed her own
+intentions, she would sit, every moment she could steal from observation,
+listening to the tale, which Maria was eager to relate with all the
+persuasive eloquence of grief.
+
+It is so cheering to see a human face, even if little of the divinity of
+virtue beam in it, that Maria anxiously expected the return of the
+attendant, as of a gleam of light to break the gloom of idleness.
+Indulged sorrow; she perceived, must blunt or sharpen the faculties to
+the two opposite extremes; producing stupidity, the moping melancholy of
+indolence; or the restless activity of a disturbed imagination. She sunk
+into one state, after being fatigued by the other: till the want of
+occupation became even more painful than the actual pressure or
+apprehension of sorrow; and the confinement that froze her into a nook of
+existence, with an unvaried prospect before her, the most insupportable
+of evils. The lamp of life seemed to be spending itself to chase the
+vapours of a dungeon which no art could dissipate.--And to what purpose
+did she rally all her energy?--Was not the world a vast prison, and women
+born slaves?
+
+Though she failed immediately to rouse a lively sense of injustice in the
+mind of her guard, because it had been sophisticated into misanthropy,
+she touched her heart. Jemima (she had only a claim to a Christian name,
+which had not procured her any Christian privileges) could patiently hear
+of Maria's confinement on false pretences; she had felt the crushing hand
+of power, hardened by the exercise of injustice, and ceased to wonder at
+the perversions of the understanding, which systematize oppression; but,
+when told that her child, only four months old, had been torn from her,
+even while she was discharging the tenderest maternal office, the woman
+awoke in a bosom long estranged from feminine emotions, and Jemima
+determined to alleviate all in her power, without hazarding the loss of
+her place, the sufferings of a wretched mother, apparently injured, and
+certainly unhappy. A sense of right seems to result from the simplest act
+of reason, and to preside over the faculties of the mind, like the
+master-sense of feeling, to rectify the rest; but (for the comparison may
+be carried still farther) how often is the exquisite sensibility of both
+weakened or destroyed by the vulgar occupations, and ignoble pleasures of
+life?
+
+The preserving her situation was, indeed, an important object to Jemima,
+who had been hunted from hole to hole, as if she had been a beast of
+prey, or infected with a moral plague. The wages she received, the
+greater part of which she hoarded, as her only chance for independence,
+were much more considerable than she could reckon on obtaining any where
+else, were it possible that she, an outcast from society, could be
+permitted to earn a subsistence in a reputable family. Hearing Maria
+perpetually complain of listlessness, and the not being able to beguile
+grief by resuming her customary pursuits, she was easily prevailed on, by
+compassion, and that involuntary respect for abilities, which those who
+possess them can never eradicate, to bring her some books and implements
+for writing. Maria's conversation had amused and interested her, and the
+natural consequence was a desire, scarcely observed by herself, of
+obtaining the esteem of a person she admired. The remembrance of better
+days was rendered more lively; and the sentiments then acquired appearing
+less romantic than they had for a long period, a spark of hope roused
+her mind to new activity.
+
+How grateful was her attention to Maria! Oppressed by a dead weight of
+existence, or preyed on by the gnawing worm of discontent, with what
+eagerness did she endeavour to shorten the long days, which left no
+traces behind! She seemed to be sailing on the vast ocean of life,
+without seeing any land-mark to indicate the progress of time; to find
+employment was then to find variety, the animating principle of nature.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. II.
+
+
+EARNESTLY as Maria endeavoured to soothe, by reading, the anguish of her
+wounded mind, her thoughts would often wander from the subject she was
+led to discuss, and tears of maternal tenderness obscured the reasoning
+page. She descanted on "the ills which flesh is heir to," with
+bitterness, when the recollection of her babe was revived by a tale of
+fictitious woe, that bore any resemblance to her own; and her imagination
+was continually employed, to conjure up and embody the various phantoms
+of misery, which folly and vice had let loose on the world. The loss of
+her babe was the tender string; against other cruel remembrances she
+laboured to steel her bosom; and even a ray of hope, in the midst of her
+gloomy reveries, would sometimes gleam on the dark horizon of futurity,
+while persuading herself that she ought to cease to hope, since happiness
+was no where to be found.--But of her child, debilitated by the grief
+with which its mother had been assailed before it saw the light, she
+could not think without an impatient struggle.
+
+"I, alone, by my active tenderness, could have saved," she would exclaim,
+"from an early blight, this sweet blossom; and, cherishing it, I should
+have had something still to love."
+
+In proportion as other expectations were torn from her, this tender one
+had been fondly clung to, and knit into her heart.
+
+The books she had obtained, were soon devoured, by one who had no other
+resource to escape from sorrow, and the feverish dreams of ideal
+wretchedness or felicity, which equally weaken the intoxicated
+sensibility. Writing was then the only alternative, and she wrote some
+rhapsodies descriptive of the state of her mind; but the events of her
+past life pressing on her, she resolved circumstantially to relate them,
+with the sentiments that experience, and more matured reason, would
+naturally suggest. They might perhaps instruct her daughter, and shield
+her from the misery, the tyranny, her mother knew not how to avoid.
+
+This thought gave life to her diction, her soul flowed into it, and she
+soon found the task of recollecting almost obliterated impressions very
+interesting. She lived again in the revived emotions of youth, and
+forgot her present in the retrospect of sorrows that had assumed an
+unalterable character.
+
+Though this employment lightened the weight of time, yet, never losing
+sight of her main object, Maria did not allow any opportunity to slip of
+winning on the affections of Jemima; for she discovered in her a strength
+of mind, that excited her esteem, clouded as it was by the misanthropy of
+despair.
+
+An insulated being, from the misfortune of her birth, she despised and
+preyed on the society by which she had been oppressed, and loved not her
+fellow-creatures, because she had never been beloved. No mother had ever
+fondled her, no father or brother had protected her from outrage; and the
+man who had plunged her into infamy, and deserted her when she stood in
+greatest need of support, deigned not to smooth with kindness the road to
+ruin. Thus degraded, was she let loose on the world; and virtue, never
+nurtured by affection, assumed the stern aspect of selfish independence.
+
+This general view of her life, Maria gathered from her exclamations and
+dry remarks. Jemima indeed displayed a strange mixture of interest and
+suspicion; for she would listen to her with earnestness, and then
+suddenly interrupt the conversation, as if afraid of resigning, by giving
+way to her sympathy, her dear-bought knowledge of the world.
+
+Maria alluded to the possibility of an escape, and mentioned a
+compensation, or reward; but the style in which she was repulsed made her
+cautious, and determine not to renew the subject, till she knew more of
+the character she had to work on. Jemima's countenance, and dark hints,
+seemed to say, "You are an extraordinary woman; but let me consider, this
+may only be one of your lucid intervals." Nay, the very energy of Maria's
+character, made her suspect that the extraordinary animation she
+perceived might be the effect of madness. "Should her husband then
+substantiate his charge, and get possession of her estate, from whence
+would come the promised annuity, or more desired protection? Besides,
+might not a woman, anxious to escape, conceal some of the circumstances
+which made against her? Was truth to be expected from one who had been
+entrapped, kidnapped, in the most fraudulent manner?"
+
+In this train Jemima continued to argue, the moment after compassion and
+respect seemed to make her swerve; and she still resolved not to be
+wrought on to do more than soften the rigour of confinement, till she
+could advance on surer ground.
+
+Maria was not permitted to walk in the garden; but sometimes, from her
+window, she turned her eyes from the gloomy walls, in which she pined
+life away, on the poor wretches who strayed along the walks, and
+contemplated the most terrific of ruins--that of a human soul. What is
+the view of the fallen column, the mouldering arch, of the most exquisite
+workmanship, when compared with this living memento of the fragility, the
+instability, of reason, and the wild luxuriancy of noxious passions?
+Enthusiasm turned adrift, like some rich stream overflowing its banks,
+rushes forward with destructive velocity, inspiring a sublime
+concentration of thought. Thus thought Maria--These are the ravages over
+which humanity must ever mournfully ponder, with a degree of anguish not
+excited by crumbling marble, or cankering brass, unfaithful to the trust
+of monumental fame. It is not over the decaying productions of the mind,
+embodied with the happiest art, we grieve most bitterly. The view of what
+has been done by man, produces a melancholy, yet aggrandizing, sense of
+what remains to be achieved by human intellect; but a mental convulsion,
+which, like the devastation of an earthquake, throws all the elements of
+thought and imagination into confusion, makes contemplation giddy, and
+we fearfully ask on what ground we ourselves stand.
+
+Melancholy and imbecility marked the features of the wretches allowed to
+breathe at large; for the frantic, those who in a strong imagination had
+lost a sense of woe, were closely confined. The playful tricks and
+mischievous devices of their disturbed fancy, that suddenly broke out,
+could not be guarded against, when they were permitted to enjoy any
+portion of freedom; for, so active was their imagination, that every new
+object which accidentally struck their senses, awoke to phrenzy their
+restless passions; as Maria learned from the burden of their incessant
+ravings.
+
+Sometimes, with a strict injunction of silence, Jemima would allow
+Maria, at the close of evening, to stray along the narrow avenues that
+separated the dungeon-like apartments, leaning on her arm. What a change
+of scene! Maria wished to pass the threshold of her prison, yet, when by
+chance she met the eye of rage glaring on her, yet unfaithful to its
+office, she shrunk back with more horror and affright, than if she had
+stumbled over a mangled corpse. Her busy fancy pictured the misery of a
+fond heart, watching over a friend thus estranged, absent, though
+present--over a poor wretch lost to reason and the social joys of
+existence; and losing all consciousness of misery in its excess. What a
+task, to watch the light of reason quivering in the eye, or with
+agonizing expectation to catch the beam of recollection; tantalized by
+hope, only to feel despair more keenly, at finding a much loved face or
+voice, suddenly remembered, or pathetically implored, only to be
+immediately forgotten, or viewed with indifference or abhorrence!
+
+The heart-rending sigh of melancholy sunk into her soul; and when she
+retired to rest, the petrified figures she had encountered, the only
+human forms she was doomed to observe, haunting her dreams with tales of
+mysterious wrongs, made her wish to sleep to dream no more.
+
+Day after day rolled away, and tedious as the present moment appeared,
+they passed in such an unvaried tenor, Maria was surprised to find that
+she had already been six weeks buried alive, and yet had such faint hopes
+of effecting her enlargement. She was, earnestly as she had sought for
+employment, now angry with herself for having been amused by writing her
+narrative; and grieved to think that she had for an instant thought of
+any thing, but contriving to escape.
+
+Jemima had evidently pleasure in her society: still, though she often
+left her with a glow of kindness, she returned with the same chilling
+air; and, when her heart appeared for a moment to open, some suggestion
+of reason forcibly closed it, before she could give utterance to the
+confidence Maria's conversation inspired.
+
+Discouraged by these changes, Maria relapsed into despondency, when she
+was cheered by the alacrity with which Jemima brought her a fresh parcel
+of books; assuring her, that she had taken some pains to obtain them from
+one of the keepers, who attended a gentleman confined in the opposite
+corner of the gallery.
+
+Maria took up the books with emotion. "They come," said she, "perhaps,
+from a wretch condemned, like me, to reason on the nature of madness, by
+having wrecked minds continually under his eye; and almost to wish
+himself--as I do--mad, to escape from the contemplation of it." Her heart
+throbbed with sympathetic alarm; and she turned over the leaves with awe,
+as if they had become sacred from passing through the hands of an
+unfortunate being, oppressed by a similar fate.
+
+Dryden's Fables, Milton's Paradise Lost, with several modern productions,
+composed the collection. It was a mine of treasure. Some marginal notes,
+in Dryden's Fables, caught her attention: they were written with force
+and taste; and, in one of the modern pamphlets, there was a fragment
+left, containing various observations on the present state of society and
+government, with a comparative view of the politics of Europe and
+America. These remarks were written with a degree of generous warmth,
+when alluding to the enslaved state of the labouring majority, perfectly
+in unison with Maria's mode of thinking.
+
+She read them over and over again; and fancy, treacherous fancy, began to
+sketch a character, congenial with her own, from these shadowy
+outlines.--"Was he mad?" She re-perused the marginal notes, and they
+seemed the production of an animated, but not of a disturbed imagination.
+Confined to this speculation, every time she re-read them, some fresh
+refinement of sentiment, or acuteness of thought impressed her, which
+she was astonished at herself for not having before observed.
+
+What a creative power has an affectionate heart! There are beings who
+cannot live without loving, as poets love; and who feel the electric
+spark of genius, wherever it awakens sentiment or grace. Maria had often
+thought, when disciplining her wayward heart, "that to charm, was to be
+virtuous." "They who make me wish to appear the most amiable and good in
+their eyes, must possess in a degree," she would exclaim, "the graces and
+virtues they call into action."
+
+She took up a book on the powers of the human mind; but, her attention
+strayed from cold arguments on the nature of what she felt, while she
+was feeling, and she snapt the chain of the theory to read Dryden's
+Guiscard and Sigismunda.
+
+Maria, in the course of the ensuing day, returned some of the books, with
+the hope of getting others--and more marginal notes. Thus shut out from
+human intercourse, and compelled to view nothing but the prison of vexed
+spirits, to meet a wretch in the same situation, was more surely to find
+a friend, than to imagine a countryman one, in a strange land, where the
+human voice conveys no information to the eager ear.
+
+"Did you ever see the unfortunate being to whom these books belong?"
+asked Maria, when Jemima brought her supper. "Yes. He sometimes walks
+out, between five and six, before the family is stirring, in the
+morning, with two keepers; but even then his hands are confined."
+
+"What! is he so unruly?" enquired Maria, with an accent of
+disappointment.
+
+"No, not that I perceive," replied Jemima; "but he has an untamed look, a
+vehemence of eye, that excites apprehension. Were his hands free, he
+looks as if he could soon manage both his guards: yet he appears
+tranquil."
+
+"If he be so strong, he must be young," observed Maria.
+
+"Three or four and thirty, I suppose; but there is no judging of a person
+in his situation."
+
+"Are you sure that he is mad?" interrupted Maria with eagerness. Jemima
+quitted the room, without replying.
+
+"No, no, he certainly is not!" exclaimed Maria, answering herself; "the
+man who could write those observations was not disordered in his
+intellects."
+
+She sat musing, gazing at the moon, and watching its motion as it seemed
+to glide under the clouds. Then, preparing for bed, she thought, "Of what
+use could I be to him, or he to me, if it be true that he is unjustly
+confined?--Could he aid me to escape, who is himself more closely
+watched?--Still I should like to see him." She went to bed, dreamed of
+her child, yet woke exactly at half after five o'clock, and starting up,
+only wrapped a gown around her, and ran to the window. The morning was
+chill, it was the latter end of September; yet she did not retire to warm
+herself and think in bed, till the sound of the servants, moving about
+the house, convinced her that the unknown would not walk in the garden
+that morning. She was ashamed at feeling disappointed; and began to
+reflect, as an excuse to herself, on the little objects which attract
+attention when there is nothing to divert the mind; and how difficult it
+was for women to avoid growing romantic, who have no active duties or
+pursuits.
+
+At breakfast, Jemima enquired whether she understood French? for, unless
+she did, the stranger's stock of books was exhausted. Maria replied in
+the affirmative; but forbore to ask any more questions respecting the
+person to whom they belonged. And Jemima gave her a new subject for
+contemplation, by describing the person of a lovely maniac, just brought
+into an adjoining chamber. She was singing the pathetic ballad of old Rob
+                 with the most heart-melting falls and pauses. Jemima had
+half-opened the door, when she distinguished her voice, and Maria stood
+close to it, scarcely daring to respire, lest a modulation should escape
+her, so exquisitely sweet, so passionately wild. She began with sympathy
+to pourtray to herself another victim, when the lovely warbler flew, as
+it were, from the spray, and a torrent of unconnected exclamations and
+questions burst from her, interrupted by fits of laughter, so horrid,
+that Maria shut the door, and, turning her eyes up to heaven,
+exclaimed--"Gracious God!"
+
+Several minutes elapsed before Maria could enquire respecting the rumour
+of the house (for this poor wretch was obviously not confined without a
+cause); and then Jemima could only tell her, that it was said, "she had
+been married, against her inclination, to a rich old man, extremely
+jealous (no wonder, for she was a charming creature); and that, in
+consequence of his treatment, or something which hung on her mind, she
+had, during her first lying-in, lost her senses."
+
+What a subject of meditation--even to the very confines of madness.
+
+"Woman, fragile flower! why were you suffered to adorn a world exposed to
+the inroad of such stormy elements?" thought Maria, while the poor
+maniac's strain was still breathing on her ear, and sinking into her very
+soul.
+
+Towards the evening, Jemima brought her Rousseau's _Heloise_; and she sat
+reading with eyes and heart, till the return of her guard to extinguish
+the light. One instance of her kindness was, the permitting Maria to have
+one, till her own hour of retiring to rest. She had read this work long
+since; but now it seemed to open a new world to her--the only one worth
+inhabiting. Sleep was not to be wooed; yet, far from being fatigued by
+the restless rotation of thought, she rose and opened her window, just as
+the thin watery clouds of twilight made the long silent shadows visible.
+The air swept across her face with a voluptuous freshness that thrilled
+to her heart, awakening indefinable emotions; and the sound of a waving
+branch, or the twittering of a startled bird, alone broke the stillness
+of reposing nature. Absorbed by the sublime sensibility which renders the
+consciousness of existence felicity, Maria was happy, till an autumnal
+scent, wafted by the breeze of morn from the fallen leaves of the
+adjacent wood, made her recollect that the season had changed since her
+confinement; yet life afforded no variety to solace an afflicted heart.
+She returned dispirited to her couch, and thought of her child till the
+broad glare of day again invited her to the window. She looked not for
+the unknown, still how great was her vexation at perceiving the back of a
+man, certainly he, with his two attendants, as he turned into a side-path
+which led to the house! A confused recollection of having seen somebody
+who resembled him, immediately occurred, to puzzle and torment her with
+endless conjectures. Five minutes sooner, and she should have seen his
+face, and been out of suspense--was ever any thing so unlucky! His
+steady, bold step, and the whole air of his person, bursting as it were
+from a cloud, pleased her, and gave an outline to the imagination to
+sketch the individual form she wished to recognize.
+
+Feeling the disappointment more severely than she was willing to believe,
+she flew to Rousseau, as her only refuge from the idea of him, who might
+prove a friend, could she but find a way to interest him in her fate;
+still the personification of Saint Preux, or of an ideal lover far
+superior, was after this imperfect model, of which merely a glance had
+been caught, even to the minutiae of the coat and hat of the stranger.
+But if she lent St. Preux, or the demi-god of her fancy, his form, she
+richly repaid him by the donation of all St. Preux's sentiments and
+feelings, culled to gratify her own, to which he seemed to have an
+undoubted right, when she read on the margin of an impassioned letter,
+written in the well-known hand--"Rousseau alone, the true Prometheus of
+sentiment, possessed the fire of genius necessary to pourtray the
+passion, the truth of which goes so directly to the heart."
+
+Maria was again true to the hour, yet had finished Rousseau, and begun to
+transcribe some selected passages; unable to quit either the author or
+the window, before she had a glimpse of the countenance she daily longed
+to see; and, when seen, it conveyed no distinct idea to her mind where
+she had seen it before. He must have been a transient acquaintance; but
+to discover an acquaintance was fortunate, could she contrive to attract
+his attention, and excite his sympathy.
+
+Every glance afforded colouring for the picture she was delineating on
+her heart; and once, when the window was half open, the sound of his
+voice reached her. Conviction flashed on her; she had certainly, in a
+moment of distress, heard the same accents. They were manly, and
+characteristic of a noble mind; nay, even sweet--or sweet they seemed to
+her attentive ear.
+
+She started back, trembling, alarmed at the emotion a strange coincidence
+of circumstances inspired, and wondering why she thought so much of a
+stranger, obliged as she had been by his timely interference; [for she
+recollected, by degrees, all the circumstances of their former meeting.]
+She found however that she could think of nothing else; or, if she
+thought of her daughter, it was to wish that she had a father whom her
+mother could respect and love.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. III.
+
+
+WHEN perusing the first parcel of books, Maria had, with her pencil,
+written in one of them a few exclamations, expressive of compassion and
+sympathy, which she scarcely remembered, till turning over the leaves of
+one of the volumes, lately brought to her, a slip of paper dropped out,
+which Jemima hastily snatched up.
+
+"Let me see it," demanded Maria impatiently, "You surely are not afraid
+of trusting me with the effusions of a madman?" "I must consider,"
+replied Jemima; and withdrew, with the paper in her hand.
+
+In a life of such seclusion, the passions gain undue force; Maria
+therefore felt a great degree of resentment and vexation, which she had
+not time to subdue, before Jemima, returning, delivered the paper.
+
+     "Whoever you are, who partake of my fate, accept my sincere
+     commiseration--I would have said protection; but the privilege of
+     man is denied me.
+
+     "My own situation forces a dreadful suspicion on my mind--I may
+     not always languish in vain for freedom--say are you--I cannot
+     ask the question; yet I will remember you when my remembrance can
+     be of any use. I will enquire, _why_ you are so mysteriously
+     detained--and I _will_ have an answer.
+
+     "HENRY DARNFORD."
+
+By the most pressing intreaties, Maria prevailed on Jemima to permit her
+to write a reply to this note. Another and another succeeded, in which
+explanations were not allowed relative to their present situation; but
+Maria, with sufficient explicitness, alluded to a former obligation; and
+they insensibly entered on an interchange of sentiments on the most
+important subjects. To write these letters was the business of the day,
+and to receive them the moment of sunshine. By some means, Darnford
+having discovered Maria's window, when she next appeared at it, he made
+her, behind his keepers, a profound bow of respect and recognition.
+
+Two or three weeks glided away in this kind of intercourse, during which
+period Jemima, to whom Maria had given the necessary information
+respecting her family, had evidently gained some intelligence, which
+increased her desire of pleasing her charge, though she could not yet
+determine to liberate her. Maria took advantage of this favourable
+charge, without too minutely enquiring into the cause; and such was her
+eagerness to hold human converse, and to see her former protector, still
+a stranger to her, that she incessantly requested her guard to gratify
+her more than curiosity.
+
+Writing to Darnford, she was led from the sad objects before her, and
+frequently rendered insensible to the horrid noises around her, which
+previously had continually employed her feverish fancy. Thinking it
+selfish to dwell on her own sufferings, when in the midst of wretches,
+who had not only lost all that endears life, but their very selves, her
+imagination was occupied with melancholy earnestness to trace the mazes
+of misery, through which so many wretches must have passed to this gloomy
+receptacle of disjointed souls, to the grand source of human corruption.
+Often at midnight was she waked by the dismal shrieks of demoniac rage,
+or of excruciating despair, uttered in such wild tones of indescribable
+anguish as proved the total absence of reason, and roused phantoms of
+horror in her mind, far more terrific than all that dreaming superstition
+ever drew. Besides, there was frequently something so inconceivably
+picturesque in the varying gestures of unrestrained passion, so
+irresistibly comic in their sallies, or so heart-piercingly pathetic in
+the little airs they would sing, frequently bursting out after an awful
+silence, as to fascinate the attention, and amuse the fancy, while
+torturing the soul. It was the uproar of the passions which she was
+compelled to observe; and to mark the lucid beam of reason, like a light
+trembling in a socket, or like the flash which divides the threatening
+clouds of angry heaven only to display the horrors which darkness
+shrouded.
+
+Jemima would labour to beguile the tedious evenings, by describing the
+persons and manners of the unfortunate beings, whose figures or voices
+awoke sympathetic sorrow in Maria's bosom; and the stories she told were
+the more interesting, for perpetually leaving room to conjecture
+something extraordinary. Still Maria, accustomed to generalize her
+observations, was led to conclude from all she heard, that it was a
+vulgar error to suppose that people of abilities were the most apt to
+lose the command of reason. On the contrary, from most of the instances
+she could investigate, she thought it resulted, that the passions only
+appeared strong and disproportioned, because the judgment was weak and
+unexercised; and that they gained strength by the decay of reason, as the
+shadows lengthen during the sun's decline.
+
+Maria impatiently wished to see her fellow-sufferer; but Darnford was
+still more earnest to obtain an interview. Accustomed to submit to every
+impulse of passion, and never taught, like women, to restrain the most
+natural, and acquire, instead of the bewitching frankness of nature, a
+factitious propriety of behaviour, every desire became a torrent that
+bore down all opposition.
+
+His travelling trunk, which contained the books lent to Maria, had been
+sent to him, and with a part of its contents he bribed his principal
+keeper; who, after receiving the most solemn promise that he would return
+to his apartment without attempting to explore any part of the house,
+conducted him, in the dusk of the evening, to Maria's room.
+
+Jemima had apprized her charge of the visit, and she expected with
+trembling impatience, inspired by a vague hope that he might again prove
+her deliverer, to see a man who had before rescued her from oppression.
+He entered with an animation of countenance, formed to captivate an
+enthusiast; and, hastily turned his eyes from her to the apartment, which
+he surveyed with apparent emotions of compassionate indignation.
+Sympathy illuminated his eye, and, taking her hand, he respectfully bowed
+on it, exclaiming--"This is extraordinary!--again to meet you, and in
+such circumstances!" Still, impressive as was the coincidence of events
+which brought them once more together, their full hearts did not
+overflow.--[54-A]
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[And though, after this first visit, they were permitted frequently to
+repeat their interviews, they were for some time employed in] a reserved
+conversation, to which all the world might have listened; excepting,
+when discussing some literary subject, flashes of sentiment, inforced by
+each relaxing feature, seemed to remind them that their minds were
+already acquainted.
+
+[By degrees, Darnford entered into the particulars of his story.] In a
+few words, he informed her that he had been a thoughtless, extravagant
+young man; yet, as he described his faults, they appeared to be the
+generous luxuriancy of a noble mind. Nothing like meanness tarnished the
+lustre of his youth, nor had the worm of selfishness lurked in the
+unfolding bud, even while he had been the dupe of others. Yet he tardily
+acquired the experience necessary to guard him against future imposition.
+
+"I shall weary you," continued he, "by my egotism; and did not powerful
+emotions draw me to you,"--his eyes glistened as he spoke, and a
+trembling seemed to run through his manly frame,--"I would not waste
+these precious moments in talking of myself.
+
+"My father and mother were people of fashion; married by their parents.
+He was fond of the turf, she of the card-table. I, and two or three other
+children since dead, were kept at home till we became intolerable. My
+father and mother had a visible dislike to each other, continually
+displayed; the servants were of the depraved kind usually found in the
+houses of people of fortune. My brothers and parents all dying, I was
+left to the care of guardians, and sent to Eton. I never knew the sweets
+of domestic affection, but I felt the want of indulgence and frivolous
+respect at school. I will not disgust you with a recital of the vices of
+my youth, which can scarcely be comprehended by female delicacy. I was
+taught to love by a creature I am ashamed to mention; and the other women
+with whom I afterwards became intimate, were of a class of which you can
+have no knowledge. I formed my acquaintance with them at the theatres;
+and, when vivacity danced in their eyes, I was not easily disgusted by
+the vulgarity which flowed from their lips. Having spent, a few years
+after I was of age, [the whole of] a considerable patrimony, excepting a
+few hundreds, I had no recourse but to purchase a commission in a
+new-raised regiment, destined to subjugate America. The regret I felt to
+renounce a life of pleasure, was counter-balanced by the curiosity I had
+to see America, or rather to travel; [nor had any of those circumstances
+occurred to my youth, which might have been calculated] to bind my
+country to my heart. I shall not trouble you with the details of a
+military life. My blood was still kept in motion; till, towards the close
+of the contest, I was wounded and taken prisoner.
+
+"Confined to my bed, or chair, by a lingering cure, my only refuge from
+the preying activity of my mind, was books, which I read with great
+avidity, profiting by the conversation of my host, a man of sound
+understanding. My political sentiments now underwent a total change; and,
+dazzled by the hospitality of the Americans, I determined to take up my
+abode with freedom. I, therefore, with my usual impetuosity, sold my
+commission, and travelled into the interior parts of the country, to lay
+out my money to advantage. Added to this, I did not much like the
+puritanical manners of the large towns. Inequality of condition was there
+most disgustingly galling. The only pleasure wealth afforded, was to make
+an ostentatious display of it; for the cultivation of the fine arts, or
+literature, had not introduced into the first circles that polish of
+manners which renders the rich so essentially superior to the poor in
+Europe. Added to this, an influx of vices had been let in by the
+Revolution, and the most rigid principles of religion shaken to the
+centre, before the understanding could be gradually emancipated from the
+prejudices which led their ancestors undauntedly to seek an inhospitable
+clime and unbroken soil. The resolution, that led them, in pursuit of
+independence, to embark on rivers like seas, to search for unknown
+shores, and to sleep under the hovering mists of endless forests, whose
+baleful damps agued their limbs, was now turned into commercial
+speculations, till the national character exhibited a phenomenon in the
+history of the human mind--a head enthusiastically enterprising, with
+cold selfishness of heart. And woman, lovely woman!--they charm every
+where--still there is a degree of prudery, and a want of taste and ease
+in the manners of the American women, that renders them, in spite of
+their roses and lilies, far inferior to our European charmers. In the
+country, they have often a bewitching simplicity of character; but, in
+the cities, they have all the airs and ignorance of the ladies who give
+the tone to the circles of the large trading towns in England. They are
+fond of their ornaments, merely because they are good, and not because
+they embellish their persons; and are more gratified to inspire the women
+with jealousy of these exterior advantages, than the men with love. All
+the frivolity which often (excuse me, Madam) renders the society of
+modest women so stupid in England, here seemed to throw still more leaden
+fetters on their charms. Not being an adept in gallantry, I found that I
+could only keep myself awake in their company by making downright love to
+them.
+
+"But, not to intrude on your patience, I retired to the track of land
+which I had purchased in the country, and my time passed pleasantly
+enough while I cut down the trees, built my house, and planted my
+different crops. But winter and idleness came, and I longed for more
+elegant society, to hear what was passing in the world, and to do
+something better than vegetate with the animals that made a very
+considerable part of my household. Consequently, I determined to travel.
+Motion was a substitute for variety of objects; and, passing over immense
+tracks of country, I exhausted my exuberant spirits, without obtaining
+much experience. I every where saw industry the fore-runner and not the
+consequence, of luxury; but this country, every thing being on an ample
+scale, did not afford those picturesque views, which a certain degree of
+cultivation is necessary gradually to produce. The eye wandered without
+an object to fix upon over immeasureable plains, and lakes that seemed
+replenished by the ocean, whilst eternal forests of small clustering
+trees, obstructed the circulation of air, and embarrassed the path,
+without gratifying the eye of taste. No cottage smiling in the waste, no
+travellers hailed us, to give life to silent nature; or, if perchance we
+saw the print of a footstep in our path, it was a dreadful warning to
+turn aside; and the head ached as if assailed by the scalping knife. The
+Indians who hovered on the skirts of the European settlements had only
+learned of their neighbours to plunder, and they stole their guns from
+them to do it with more safety.
+
+"From the woods and back settlements, I returned to the towns, and
+learned to eat and drink most valiantly; but without entering into
+commerce (and I detested commerce) I found I could not live there; and,
+growing heartily weary of the land of liberty and vulgar aristocracy,
+seated on her bags of dollars, I resolved once more to visit Europe. I
+wrote to a distant relation in England, with whom I had been educated,
+mentioning the vessel in which I intended to sail. Arriving in London, my
+senses were intoxicated. I ran from street to street, from theatre to
+theatre, and the women of the town (again I must beg pardon for my
+habitual frankness) appeared to me like angels.
+
+"A week was spent in this thoughtless manner, when, returning very late
+to the hotel in which I had lodged ever since my arrival, I was knocked
+down in a private street, and hurried, in a state of insensibility, into
+a coach, which brought me hither, and I only recovered my senses to be
+treated like one who had lost them. My keepers are deaf to my
+remonstrances and enquiries, yet assure me that my confinement shall not
+last long. Still I cannot guess, though I weary myself with conjectures,
+why I am confined, or in what part of England this house is situated. I
+imagine sometimes that I hear the sea roar, and wished myself again on
+the Atlantic, till I had a glimpse of you[65-A]."
+
+A few moments were only allowed to Maria to comment on this narrative,
+when Darnford left her to her own thoughts, to the "never ending, still
+beginning," task of weighing his words, recollecting his tones of voice,
+and feeling them reverberate on her heart.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[54-A] The copy which had received the author's last corrections, breaks
+off in this place, and the pages which follow, to the end of Chap. IV,
+are printed from a copy in a less finished state.
+
+[65-A] The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer of Maria in a former
+instance, appears to have been an after-thought of the author. This has
+occasioned the omission of any allusion to that circumstance in the
+preceding narration.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. IV.
+
+
+PITY, and the forlorn seriousness of adversity, have both been considered
+as dispositions favourable to love, while satirical writers have
+attributed the propensity to the relaxing effect of idleness, what chance
+then had Maria of escaping, when pity, sorrow, and solitude all conspired
+to soften her mind, and nourish romantic wishes, and, from a natural
+progress, romantic expectations?
+
+Maria was six-and-twenty. But, such was the native soundness of her
+constitution, that time had only given to her countenance the character
+of her mind. Revolving thought, and exercised affections had banished
+some of the playful graces of innocence, producing insensibly that
+irregularity of features which the struggles of the understanding to
+trace or govern the strong emotions of the heart, are wont to imprint on
+the yielding mass. Grief and care had mellowed, without obscuring, the
+bright tints of youth, and the thoughtfulness which resided on her brow
+did not take from the feminine softness of her features; nay, such was
+the sensibility which often mantled over it, that she frequently
+appeared, like a large proportion of her sex, only born to feel; and the
+activity of her well-proportioned, and even almost voluptuous figure,
+inspired the idea of strength of mind, rather than of body. There was a
+simplicity sometimes indeed in her manner, which bordered on infantine
+ingenuousness, that led people of common discernment to underrate her
+talents, and smile at the flights of her imagination. But those who could
+not comprehend the delicacy of her sentiments, were attached by her
+unfailing sympathy, so that she was very generally beloved by characters
+of very different descriptions; still, she was too much under the
+influence of an ardent imagination to adhere to common rules.
+
+There are mistakes of conduct which at five-and-twenty prove the strength
+of the mind, that, ten or fifteen years after, would demonstrate its
+weakness, its incapacity to acquire a sane judgment. The youths who are
+satisfied with the ordinary pleasures of life, and do not sigh after
+ideal phantoms of love and friendship, will never arrive at great
+maturity of understanding; but if these reveries are cherished, as is too
+frequently the case with women, when experience ought to have taught
+them in what human happiness consists, they become as useless as they are
+wretched. Besides, their pains and pleasures are so dependent on outward
+circumstances, on the objects of their affections, that they seldom act
+from the impulse of a nerved mind, able to choose its own pursuit.
+
+Having had to struggle incessantly with the vices of mankind, Maria's
+imagination found repose in pourtraying the possible virtues the world
+might contain. Pygmalion formed an ivory maid, and longed for an
+informing soul. She, on the contrary, combined all the qualities of a
+hero's mind, and fate presented a statue in which she might enshrine
+them.
+
+We mean not to trace the progress of this passion, or recount how often
+Darnford and Maria were obliged to part in the midst of an interesting
+conversation. Jemima ever watched on the tip-toe of fear, and frequently
+separated them on a false alarm, when they would have given worlds to
+remain a little longer together.
+
+A magic lamp now seemed to be suspended in Maria's prison, and fairy
+landscapes flitted round the gloomy walls, late so blank. Rushing from
+the depth of despair, on the seraph wing of hope, she found herself
+happy.--She was beloved, and every emotion was rapturous.
+
+To Darnford she had not shown a decided affection; the fear of outrunning
+his, a sure proof of love, made her often assume a coldness and
+indifference foreign from her character; and, even when giving way to the
+playful emotions of a heart just loosened from the frozen bond of grief,
+there was a delicacy in her manner of expressing her sensibility, which
+made him doubt whether it was the effect of love.
+
+One evening, when Jemima left them, to listen to the sound of a distant
+footstep, which seemed cautiously to approach, he seized Maria's hand--it
+was not withdrawn. They conversed with earnestness of their situation;
+and, during the conversation, he once or twice gently drew her towards
+him. He felt the fragrance of her breath, and longed, yet feared, to
+touch the lips from which it issued; spirits of purity seemed to guard
+them, while all the enchanting graces of love sported on her cheeks, and
+languished in her eyes.
+
+Jemima entering, he reflected on his diffidence with poignant regret,
+and, she once more taking alarm, he ventured, as Maria stood near his
+chair, to approach her lips with a declaration of love. She drew back
+with solemnity, he hung down his head abashed; but lifting his eyes
+timidly, they met her's; she had determined, during that instant, and
+suffered their rays to mingle. He took, with more ardour, reassured, a
+half-consenting, half-reluctant kiss, reluctant only from modesty; and
+there was a sacredness in her dignified manner of reclining her glowing
+face on his shoulder, that powerfully impressed him. Desire was lost in
+more ineffable emotions, and to protect her from insult and sorrow--to
+make her happy, seemed not only the first wish of his heart, but the most
+noble duty of his life. Such angelic confidence demanded the fidelity of
+honour; but could he, feeling her in every pulsation, could he ever
+change, could he be a villain? The emotion with which she, for a moment,
+allowed herself to be pressed to his bosom, the tear of rapturous
+sympathy, mingled with a soft melancholy sentiment of recollected
+disappointment, said--more of truth and faithfulness, than the tongue
+could have given utterance to in hours! They were silent--yet discoursed,
+how eloquently? till, after a moment's reflection, Maria drew her chair
+by the side of his, and, with a composed sweetness of voice, and
+supernatural benignity of countenance, said, "I must open my whole heart
+to you; you must be told who I am, why I am here, and why, telling you I
+am a wife, I blush not to"--the blush spoke the rest.
+
+Jemima was again at her elbow, and the restraint of her presence did not
+prevent an animated conversation, in which love, sly urchin, was ever at
+bo-peep.
+
+So much of heaven did they enjoy, that paradise bloomed around them; or
+they, by a powerful spell, had been transported into Armida's garden.
+Love, the grand enchanter, "lapt them in Elysium," and every sense was
+harmonized to joy and social extacy. So animated, indeed, were their
+accents of tenderness, in discussing what, in other circumstances, would
+have been common-place subjects, that Jemima felt, with surprise, a tear
+of pleasure trickling down her rugged cheeks. She wiped it away, half
+ashamed; and when Maria kindly enquired the cause, with all the eager
+solicitude of a happy being wishing to impart to all nature its
+overflowing felicity, Jemima owned that it was the first tear that social
+enjoyment had ever drawn from her. She seemed indeed to breathe more
+freely; the cloud of suspicion cleared away from her brow; she felt
+herself, for once in her life, treated like a fellow-creature.
+
+Imagination! who can paint thy power; or reflect the evanescent tints of
+hope fostered by thee? A despondent gloom had long obscured Maria's
+horizon--now the sun broke forth, the rainbow appeared, and every
+prospect was fair. Horror still reigned in the darkened cells, suspicion
+lurked in the passages, and whispered along the walls. The yells of men
+possessed, sometimes made them pause, and wonder that they felt so happy,
+in a tomb of living death. They even chid themselves for such apparent
+insensibility; still the world contained not three happier beings. And
+Jemima, after again patrolling the passage, was so softened by the air of
+confidence which breathed around her, that she voluntarily began an
+account of herself.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. V.
+
+
+"MY father," said Jemima, "seduced my mother, a pretty girl, with whom he
+lived fellow-servant; and she no sooner perceived the natural, the
+dreaded consequence, than the terrible conviction flashed on her--that
+she was ruined. Honesty, and a regard for her reputation, had been the
+only principles inculcated by her mother; and they had been so forcibly
+impressed, that she feared shame, more than the poverty to which it would
+lead. Her incessant importunities to prevail upon my father to screen her
+from reproach by marrying her, as he had promised in the fervour of
+seduction, estranged him from her so completely, that her very person
+became distasteful to him; and he began to hate, as well as despise me,
+before I was born.
+
+"My mother, grieved to the soul by his neglect, and unkind treatment,
+actually resolved to famish herself; and injured her health by the
+attempt; though she had not sufficient resolution to adhere to her
+project, or renounce it entirely. Death came not at her call; yet sorrow,
+and the methods she adopted to conceal her condition, still doing the
+work of a house-maid, had such an effect on her constitution, that she
+died in the wretched garret, where her virtuous mistress had forced her
+to take refuge in the very pangs of labour, though my father, after a
+slight reproof, was allowed to remain in his place--allowed by the mother
+of six children, who, scarcely permitting a footstep to be heard, during
+her month's indulgence, felt no sympathy for the poor wretch, denied
+every comfort required by her situation.
+
+"The day my mother died, the ninth after my birth, I was consigned to the
+care of the cheapest nurse my father could find; who suckled her own
+child at the same time, and lodged as many more as she could get, in two
+cellar-like apartments.
+
+"Poverty, and the habit of seeing children die off her hands, had so
+hardened her heart, that the office of a mother did not awaken the
+tenderness of a woman; nor were the feminine caresses which seem a part
+of the rearing of a child, ever bestowed on me. The chicken has a wing to
+shelter under; but I had no bosom to nestle in, no kindred warmth to
+foster me. Left in dirt, to cry with cold and hunger till I was weary,
+and sleep without ever being prepared by exercise, or lulled by kindness
+to rest; could I be expected to become any thing but a weak and rickety
+babe? Still, in spite of neglect, I continued to exist, to learn to curse
+existence," her countenance grew ferocious as she spoke, "and the
+treatment that rendered me miserable, seemed to sharpen my wits. Confined
+then in a damp hovel, to rock the cradle of the succeeding tribe, I
+looked like a little old woman, or a hag shrivelling into nothing. The
+furrows of reflection and care contracted the youthful cheek, and gave a
+sort of supernatural wildness to the ever watchful eye. During this
+period, my father had married another fellow-servant, who loved him less,
+and knew better how to manage his passion, than my mother. She likewise
+proving with child, they agreed to keep a shop: my step-mother, if, being
+an illegitimate offspring, I may venture thus to characterize her, having
+obtained a sum of a rich relation, for that purpose.
+
+"Soon after her lying-in, she prevailed on my father to take me home, to
+save the expence of maintaining me, and of hiring a girl to assist her in
+the care of the child. I was young, it was true, but appeared a knowing
+little thing, and might be made handy. Accordingly I was brought to her
+house; but not to a home--for a home I never knew. Of this child, a
+daughter, she was extravagantly fond; and it was a part of my employment,
+to assist to spoil her, by humouring all her whims, and bearing all her
+caprices. Feeling her own consequence, before she could speak, she had
+learned the art of tormenting me, and if I ever dared to resist, I
+received blows, laid on with no compunctious hand, or was sent to bed
+dinnerless, as well as supperless. I said that it was a part of my daily
+labour to attend this child, with the servility of a slave; still it was
+but a part. I was sent out in all seasons, and from place to place, to
+carry burdens far above my strength, without being allowed to draw near
+the fire, or ever being cheered by encouragement or kindness. No wonder
+then, treated like a creature of another species, that I began to envy,
+and at length to hate, the darling of the house. Yet, I perfectly
+remember, that it was the caresses, and kind expressions of my
+step-mother, which first excited my jealous discontent. Once, I cannot
+forget it, when she was calling in vain her wayward child to kiss her, I
+ran to her, saying, 'I will kiss you, ma'am!' and how did my heart, which
+was in my mouth, sink, what was my debasement of soul, when pushed away
+with--'I do not want you, pert thing!' Another day, when a new gown had
+excited the highest good humour, and she uttered the appropriate _dear_,
+addressed unexpectedly to me, I thought I could never do enough to please
+her; I was all alacrity, and rose proportionably in my own estimation.
+
+"As her daughter grew up, she was pampered with cakes and fruit, while I
+was, literally speaking, fed with the refuse of the table, with her
+leavings. A liquorish tooth is, I believe, common to children, and I used
+to steal any thing sweet, that I could catch up with a chance of
+concealment. When detected, she was not content to chastize me herself at
+the moment, but, on my father's return in the evening (he was a shopman),
+the principal discourse was to recount my faults, and attribute them to
+the wicked disposition which I had brought into the world with me,
+inherited from my mother. He did not fail to leave the marks of his
+resentment on my body, and then solaced himself by playing with my
+sister.--I could have murdered her at those moments. To save myself from
+these unmerciful corrections, I resorted to falshood, and the untruths
+which I sturdily maintained, were brought in judgment against me, to
+support my tyrant's inhuman charge of my natural propensity to vice.
+Seeing me treated with contempt, and always being fed and dressed
+better, my sister conceived a contemptuous opinion of me, that proved an
+obstacle to all affection; and my father, hearing continually of my
+faults, began to consider me as a curse entailed on him for his sins: he
+was therefore easily prevailed on to bind me apprentice to one of my
+step-mother's friends, who kept a slop-shop in Wapping. I was represented
+(as it was said) in my true colours; but she, 'warranted,' snapping her
+fingers, 'that she should break my spirit or heart.'
+
+"My mother replied, with a whine, 'that if any body could make me better,
+it was such a clever woman as herself; though, for her own part, she had
+tried in vain; but good-nature was her fault.'
+
+"I shudder with horror, when I recollect the treatment I had now to
+endure. Not only under the lash of my task-mistress, but the drudge of
+the maid, apprentices and children, I never had a taste of human kindness
+to soften the rigour of perpetual labour. I had been introduced as an
+object of abhorrence into the family; as a creature of whom my
+step-mother, though she had been kind enough to let me live in the house
+with her own child, could make nothing. I was described as a wretch,
+whose nose must be kept to the grinding stone--and it was held there with
+an iron grasp. It seemed indeed the privilege of their superior nature to
+kick me about, like the dog or cat. If I were attentive, I was called
+fawning, if refractory, an obstinate mule, and like a mule I received
+their censure on my loaded back. Often has my mistress, for some
+instance of forgetfulness, thrown me from one side of the kitchen to the
+other, knocked my head against the wall, spit in my face, with various
+refinements on barbarity that I forbear to enumerate, though they were
+all acted over again by the servant, with additional insults, to which
+the appellation of _bastard_, was commonly added, with taunts or sneers.
+But I will not attempt to give you an adequate idea of my situation, lest
+you, who probably have never been drenched with the dregs of human
+misery, should think I exaggerate.
+
+"I stole now, from absolute necessity,--bread; yet whatever else was
+taken, which I had it not in my power to take, was ascribed to me. I was
+the filching cat, the ravenous dog, the dumb brute, who must bear all;
+for if I endeavoured to exculpate myself, I was silenced, without any
+enquiries being made, with 'Hold your tongue, you never tell truth.' Even
+the very air I breathed was tainted with scorn; for I was sent to the
+neighbouring shops with Glutton, Liar, or Thief, written on my forehead.
+This was, at first, the most bitter punishment; but sullen pride, or a
+kind of stupid desperation, made me, at length, almost regardless of the
+contempt, which had wrung from me so many solitary tears at the only
+moments when I was allowed to rest.
+
+"Thus was I the mark of cruelty till my sixteenth year; and then I have
+only to point out a change of misery; for a period I never knew. Allow me
+first to make one observation. Now I look back, I cannot help
+attributing the greater part of my misery, to the misfortune of having
+been thrown into the world without the grand support of life--a mother's
+affection. I had no one to love me; or to make me respected, to enable me
+to acquire respect. I was an egg dropped on the sand; a pauper by nature,
+shunted from family to family, who belonged to nobody--and nobody cared
+for me. I was despised from my birth, and denied the chance of obtaining
+a footing for myself in society. Yes; I had not even the chance of being
+considered as a fellow-creature--yet all the people with whom I lived,
+brutalized as they were by the low cunning of trade, and the despicable
+shifts of poverty, were not without bowels, though they never yearned for
+me. I was, in fact, born a slave, and chained by infamy to slavery
+during the whole of existence, without having any companions to alleviate
+it by sympathy, or teach me how to rise above it by their example. But,
+to resume the thread of my tale--
+
+"At sixteen, I suddenly grew tall, and something like comeliness appeared
+on a Sunday, when I had time to wash my face, and put on clean clothes.
+My master had once or twice caught hold of me in the passage; but I
+instinctively avoided his disgusting caresses. One day however, when the
+family were at a methodist meeting, he contrived to be alone in the house
+with me, and by blows--yes; blows and menaces, compelled me to submit to
+his ferocious desire; and, to avoid my mistress's fury, I was obliged in
+future to comply, and skulk to my loft at his command, in spite of
+increasing loathing.
+
+"The anguish which was now pent up in my bosom, seemed to open a new
+world to me: I began to extend my thoughts beyond myself, and grieve for
+human misery, till I discovered, with horror--ah! what horror!--that I
+was with child. I know not why I felt a mixed sensation of despair and
+tenderness, excepting that, ever called a bastard, a bastard appeared to
+me an object of the greatest compassion in creation.
+
+"I communicated this dreadful circumstance to my master, who was almost
+equally alarmed at the intelligence; for he feared his wife, and public
+censure at the meeting. After some weeks of deliberation had elapsed, I
+in continual fear that my altered shape would be noticed, my master gave
+me a medicine in a phial, which he desired me to take, telling me,
+without any circumlocution, for what purpose it was designed. I burst
+into tears, I thought it was killing myself--yet was such a self as I
+worth preserving? He cursed me for a fool, and left me to my own
+reflections. I could not resolve to take this infernal potion; but I
+wrapped it up in an old gown, and hid it in a corner of my box.
+
+"Nobody yet suspected me, because they had been accustomed to view me as
+a creature of another species. But the threatening storm at last broke
+over my devoted head--never shall I forget it! One Sunday evening when I
+was left, as usual, to take care of the house, my master came home
+intoxicated, and I became the prey of his brutal appetite. His extreme
+intoxication made him forget his customary caution, and my mistress
+entered and found us in a situation that could not have been more hateful
+to her than me. Her husband was 'pot-valiant,' he feared her not at the
+moment, nor had he then much reason, for she instantly turned the whole
+force of her anger another way. She tore off my cap, scratched, kicked,
+and buffetted me, till she had exhausted her strength, declaring, as she
+rested her arm, 'that I had wheedled her husband from her.--But, could
+any thing better be expected from a wretch, whom she had taken into her
+house out of pure charity?' What a torrent of abuse rushed out? till,
+almost breathless, she concluded with saying, 'that I was born a
+strumpet; it ran in my blood, and nothing good could come to those who
+harboured me.'
+
+"My situation was, of course, discovered, and she declared that I should
+not stay another night under the same roof with an honest family. I was
+therefore pushed out of doors, and my trumpery thrown after me, when it
+had been contemptuously examined in the passage, lest I should have
+stolen any thing.
+
+"Behold me then in the street, utterly destitute! Whither could I creep
+for shelter? To my father's roof I had no claim, when not pursued by
+shame--now I shrunk back as from death, from my mother's cruel
+reproaches, my father's execrations. I could not endure to hear him curse
+the day I was born, though life had been a curse to me. Of death I
+thought, but with a confused emotion of terror, as I stood leaning my
+head on a post, and starting at every footstep, lest it should be my
+mistress coming to tear my heart out. One of the boys of the shop passing
+by, heard my tale, and immediately repaired to his master, to give him a
+description of my situation; and he touched the right key--the scandal it
+would give rise to, if I were left to repeat my tale to every enquirer.
+This plea came home to his reason, who had been sobered by his wife's
+rage, the fury of which fell on him when I was out of her reach, and he
+sent the boy to me with half-a-guinea, desiring him to conduct me to a
+house, where beggars, and other wretches, the refuse of society, nightly
+lodged.
+
+"This night was spent in a state of stupefaction, or desperation. I
+detested mankind, and abhorred myself.
+
+"In the morning I ventured out, to throw myself in my master's way, at
+his usual hour of going abroad. I approached him, he 'damned me for a
+b----, declared I had disturbed the peace of the family, and that he had
+sworn to his wife, never to take any more notice of me.' He left me; but,
+instantly returning, he told me that he should speak to his friend, a
+parish-officer, to get a nurse for the brat I laid to him; and advised
+me, if I wished to keep out of the house of correction, not to make free
+with his name.
+
+"I hurried back to my hole, and, rage giving place to despair, sought for
+the potion that was to procure abortion, and swallowed it, with a wish
+that it might destroy me, at the same time that it stopped the sensations
+of new-born life, which I felt with indescribable emotion. My head
+turned round, my heart grew sick, and in the horrors of approaching
+dissolution, mental anguish was swallowed up. The effect of the medicine
+was violent, and I was confined to my bed several days; but, youth and a
+strong constitution prevailing, I once more crawled out, to ask myself
+the cruel question, 'Whither I should go?' I had but two shillings left
+in my pocket, the rest had been expended, by a poor woman who slept in
+the same room, to pay for my lodging, and purchase the necessaries of
+which she partook.
+
+"With this wretch I went into the neighbouring streets to beg, and my
+disconsolate appearance drew a few pence from the idle, enabling me still
+to command a bed; till, recovering from my illness, and taught to put on
+my rags to the best advantage, I was accosted from different motives, and
+yielded to the desire of the brutes I met, with the same detestation that
+I had felt for my still more brutal master. I have since read in novels
+of the blandishments of seduction, but I had not even the pleasure of
+being enticed into vice.
+
+"I shall not," interrupted Jemima, "lead your imagination into all the
+scenes of wretchedness and depravity, which I was condemned to view; or
+mark the different stages of my debasing misery. Fate dragged me through
+the very kennels of society; I was still a slave, a bastard, a common
+property. Become familiar with vice, for I wish to conceal nothing from
+you, I picked the pockets of the drunkards who abused me; and proved by
+my conduct, that I deserved the epithets, with which they loaded me at
+moments when distrust ought to cease.
+
+"Detesting my nightly occupation, though valuing, if I may so use the
+word, my independence, which only consisted in choosing the street in
+which I should wander, or the roof, when I had money, in which I should
+hide my head, I was some time before I could prevail on myself to accept
+of a place in a house of ill fame, to which a girl, with whom I had
+accidentally conversed in the street, had recommended me. I had been
+hunted almost into a a fever, by the watchmen of the quarter of the town
+I frequented; one, whom I had unwittingly offended, giving the word to
+the whole pack. You can scarcely conceive the tyranny exercised by these
+wretches: considering themselves as the instruments of the very laws they
+violate, the pretext which steels their conscience, hardens their heart.
+Not content with receiving from us, outlaws of society (let other women
+talk of favours) a brutal gratification gratuitously as a privilege of
+office, they extort a tithe of prostitution, and harrass with threats the
+poor creatures whose occupation affords not the means to silence the
+growl of avarice. To escape from this persecution, I once more entered
+into servitude.
+
+"A life of comparative regularity restored my health; and--do not
+start--my manners were improved, in a situation where vice sought to
+render itself alluring, and taste was cultivated to fashion the person,
+if not to refine the mind. Besides, the common civility of speech,
+contrasted with the gross vulgarity to which I had been accustomed, was
+something like the polish of civilization. I was not shut out from all
+intercourse of humanity. Still I was galled by the yoke of service, and
+my mistress often flying into violent fits of passion, made me dread a
+sudden dismission, which I understood was always the case. I was
+therefore prevailed on, though I felt a horror of men, to accept the
+offer of a gentleman, rather in the decline of years, to keep his house,
+pleasantly situated in a little village near Hampstead.
+
+"He was a man of great talents, and of brilliant wit; but, a worn-out
+votary of voluptuousness, his desires became fastidious in proportion as
+they grew weak, and the native tenderness of his heart was undermined by
+a vitiated imagination. A thoughtless career of libertinism and social
+enjoyment, had injured his health to such a degree, that, whatever
+pleasure his conversation afforded me (and my esteem was ensured by
+proofs of the generous humanity of his disposition), the being his
+mistress was purchasing it at a very dear rate. With such a keen
+perception of the delicacies of sentiment, with an imagination
+invigorated by the exercise of genius, how could he sink into the
+grossness of sensuality!
+
+"But, to pass over a subject which I recollect with pain, I must remark
+to you, as an answer to your often-repeated question, 'Why my sentiments
+and language were superior to my station?' that I now began to read, to
+beguile the tediousness of solitude, and to gratify an inquisitive,
+active mind. I had often, in my childhood, followed a ballad-singer, to
+hear the sequel of a dismal story, though sure of being severely punished
+for delaying to return with whatever I was sent to purchase. I could just
+spell and put a sentence together, and I listened to the various
+arguments, though often mingled with obscenity, which occurred at the
+table where I was allowed to preside: for a literary friend or two
+frequently came home with my master, to dine and pass the night. Having
+lost the privileged respect of my sex, my presence, instead of
+restraining, perhaps gave the reins to their tongues; still I had the
+advantage of hearing discussions, from which, in the common course of
+life, women are excluded.
+
+"You may easily imagine, that it was only by degrees that I could
+comprehend some of the subjects they investigated, or acquire from their
+reasoning what might be termed a moral sense. But my fondness of reading
+increasing, and my master occasionally shutting himself up in this
+retreat, for weeks together, to write, I had many opportunities of
+improvement. At first, considering money I was right!" (exclaimed Jemima,
+altering her tone of voice) "as the only means, after my loss of
+reputation, of obtaining respect, or even the toleration of humanity, I
+had not the least scruple to secrete a part of the sums intrusted to me,
+and to screen myself from detection by a system of falshood. But,
+acquiring new principles, I began to have the ambition of returning to
+the respectable part of society, and was weak enough to suppose it
+possible. The attention of my unassuming instructor, who, without being
+ignorant of his own powers, possessed great simplicity of manners,
+strengthened the illusion. Having sometimes caught up hints for thought,
+from my untutored remarks, he often led me to discuss the subjects he was
+treating, and would read to me his productions, previous to their
+publication, wishing to profit by the criticism of unsophisticated
+feeling. The aim of his writings was to touch the simple springs of the
+heart; for he despised the would-be oracles, the self-elected
+philosophers, who fright away fancy, while sifting each grain of thought
+to prove that slowness of comprehension is wisdom.
+
+"I should have distinguished this as a moment of sunshine, a happy period
+in my life, had not the repugnance the disgusting libertinism of my
+protector inspired, daily become more painful.--And, indeed, I soon did
+recollect it as such with agony, when his sudden death (for he had
+recourse to the most exhilarating cordials to keep up the convivial tone
+of his spirits) again threw me into the desert of human society. Had he
+had any time for reflection, I am certain he would have left the little
+property in his power to me: but, attacked by the fatal apoplexy in town,
+his heir, a man of rigid morals, brought his wife with him to take
+possession of the house and effects, before I was even informed of his
+death,--'to prevent,' as she took care indirectly to tell me, 'such a
+creature as she supposed me to be, from purloining any of them, had I
+been apprized of the event in time.'
+
+"The grief I felt at the sudden shock the information gave me, which at
+first had nothing selfish in it, was treated with contempt, and I was
+ordered to pack up my clothes; and a few trinkets and books, given me by
+the generous deceased, were contested, while they piously hoped, with a
+reprobating shake of the head, 'that God would have mercy on his sinful
+soul!' With some difficulty, I obtained my arrears of wages; but
+asking--such is the spirit-grinding consequence of poverty and
+infamy--for a character for honesty and economy, which God knows I
+merited, I was told by this--why must I call her woman?--'that it would
+go against her conscience to recommend a kept mistress.' Tears started in
+my eyes, burning tears; for there are situations in which a wretch is
+humbled by the contempt they are conscious they do not deserve.
+
+"I returned to the metropolis; but the solitude of a poor lodging was
+inconceivably dreary, after the society I had enjoyed. To be cut off from
+human converse, now I had been taught to relish it, was to wander a ghost
+among the living. Besides, I foresaw, to aggravate the severity of my
+fate, that my little pittance would soon melt away. I endeavoured to
+obtain needlework; but, not having been taught early, and my hands being
+rendered clumsy by hard work, I did not sufficiently excel to be employed
+by the ready-made linen shops, when so many women, better qualified, were
+suing for it. The want of a character prevented my getting a place; for,
+irksome as servitude would have been to me, I should have made another
+trial, had it been feasible. Not that I disliked employment, but the
+inequality of condition to which I must have submitted. I had acquired a
+taste for literature, during the five years I had lived with a literary
+man, occasionally conversing with men of the first abilities of the age;
+and now to descend to the lowest vulgarity, was a degree of wretchedness
+not to be imagined unfelt. I had not, it is true, tasted the charms of
+affection, but I had been familiar with the graces of humanity.
+
+"One of the gentlemen, whom I had frequently dined in company with, while
+I was treated like a companion, met me in the street, and enquired after
+my health. I seized the occasion, and began to describe my situation; but
+he was in haste to join, at dinner, a select party of choice spirits;
+therefore, without waiting to hear me, he impatiently put a guinea into
+my hand, saying, 'It was a pity such a sensible woman should be in
+distress--he wished me well from his soul.'
+
+"To another I wrote, stating my case, and requesting advice. He was an
+advocate for unequivocal sincerity; and had often, in my presence,
+descanted on the evils which arise in society from the despotism of rank
+and riches.
+
+"In reply, I received a long essay on the energy of the human mind, with
+continual allusions to his own force of character. He added, 'That the
+woman who could write such a letter as I had sent him, could never be in
+want of resources, were she to look into herself, and exert her powers;
+misery was the consequence of indolence, and, as to my being shut out
+from society, it was the lot of man to submit to certain privations.'
+
+"How often have I heard," said Jemima, interrupting her narrative, "in
+conversation, and read in books, that every person willing to work may
+find employment? It is the vague assertion, I believe, of insensible
+indolence, when it relates to men; but, with respect to women, I am sure
+of its fallacy, unless they will submit to the most menial bodily labour;
+and even to be employed at hard labour is out of the reach of many, whose
+reputation misfortune or folly has tainted.
+
+"How writers, professing to be friends to freedom, and the improvement of
+morals, can assert that poverty is no evil, I cannot imagine."
+
+"No more can I," interrupted Maria, "yet they even expatiate on the
+peculiar happiness of indigence, though in what it can consist, excepting
+in brutal rest, when a man can barely earn a subsistence, I cannot
+imagine. The mind is necessarily imprisoned in its own little tenement;
+and, fully occupied by keeping it in repair, has not time to rove abroad
+for improvement. The book of knowledge is closely clasped, against those
+who must fulfil their daily task of severe manual labour or die; and
+curiosity, rarely excited by thought or information, seldom moves on the
+stagnate lake of ignorance."
+
+"As far as I have been able to observe," replied Jemima, "prejudices,
+caught up by chance, are obstinately maintained by the poor, to the
+exclusion of improvement; they have not time to reason or reflect to any
+extent, or minds sufficiently exercised to adopt the principles of
+action, which form perhaps the only basis of contentment in every
+station[114-A]."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+"And independence," said Darnford, "they are necessarily strangers to,
+even the independence of despising their persecutors. If the poor are
+happy, or can be happy, _things are very well as they are_. And I cannot
+conceive on what principle those writers contend for a change of system,
+who support this opinion. The authors on the other side of the question
+are much more consistent, who grant the fact; yet, insisting that it is
+the lot of the majority to be oppressed in this life, kindly turn them
+over to another, to rectify the false weights and measures of this, as
+the only way to justify the dispensations of Providence. I have not,"
+continued Darnford, "an opinion more firmly fixed by observation in my
+mind, than that, though riches may fail to produce proportionate
+happiness, poverty most commonly excludes it, by shutting up all the
+avenues to improvement."
+
+"And as for the affections," added Maria, with a sigh, "how gross, and
+even tormenting do they become, unless regulated by an improving mind!
+The culture of the heart ever, I believe, keeps pace with that of the
+mind. But pray go on," addressing Jemima, "though your narrative gives
+rise to the most painful reflections on the present state of society."
+
+"Not to trouble you," continued she, "with a detailed description of all
+the painful feelings of unavailing exertion, I have only to tell you,
+that at last I got recommended to wash in a few families, who did me the
+favour to admit me into their houses, without the most strict enquiry, to
+wash from one in the morning till eight at night, for eighteen or
+twenty-pence a day. On the happiness to be enjoyed over a washing-tub I
+need not comment; yet you will allow me to observe, that this was a
+wretchedness of situation peculiar to my sex. A man with half my
+industry, and, I may say, abilities, could have procured a decent
+livelihood, and discharged some of the duties which knit mankind
+together; whilst I, who had acquired a taste for the rational, nay, in
+honest pride let me assert it, the virtuous enjoyments of life, was cast
+aside as the filth of society. Condemned to labour, like a machine, only
+to earn bread, and scarcely that, I became melancholy and desperate.
+
+"I have now to mention a circumstance which fills me with remorse, and
+fear it will entirely deprive me of your esteem. A tradesman became
+attached to me, and visited me frequently,--and I at last obtained such a
+power over him, that he offered to take me home to his house.--Consider,
+dear madam, I was famishing: wonder not that I became a wolf!--The only
+reason for not taking me home immediately, was the having a girl in the
+house, with child by him--and this girl--I advised him--yes, I did! would
+I could forget it!--to turn out of doors: and one night he determined to
+follow my advice, Poor wretch! she fell upon her knees, reminded him
+that he had promised to marry her, that her parents were honest!--What
+did it avail?--She was turned out.
+
+"She approached her father's door, in the skirts of London,--listened at
+the shutters,--but could not knock. A watchman had observed her go and
+return several times--Poor wretch!--"The remorse Jemima spoke of, seemed
+to be stinging her to the soul, as she proceeded."
+
+"She left it, and, approaching a tub where horses were watered, she sat
+down in it, and, with desperate resolution, remained in that
+attitude--till resolution was no longer necessary!
+
+"I happened that morning to be going out to wash, anticipating the moment
+when I should escape from such hard labour. I passed by, just as some
+men, going to work, drew out the stiff, cold corpse--Let me not recal the
+horrid moment!--I recognized her pale visage; I listened to the tale told
+by the spectators, and my heart did not burst. I thought of my own state,
+and wondered how I could be such a monster!--I worked hard; and,
+returning home, I was attacked by a fever. I suffered both in body and
+mind. I determined not to live with the wretch. But he did not try me; he
+left the neighbourhood. I once more returned to the wash-tub.
+
+"Still this state, miserable as it was, admitted of aggravation. Lifting
+one day a heavy load, a tub fell against my shin, and gave me great pain.
+I did not pay much attention to the hurt, till it became a serious wound;
+being obliged to work as usual, or starve. But, finding myself at length
+unable to stand for any time, I thought of getting into an hospital.
+Hospitals, it should seem (for they are comfortless abodes for the sick)
+were expressly endowed for the reception of the friendless; yet I, who
+had on that plea a right to assistance, wanted the recommendation of the
+rich and respectable, and was several weeks languishing for admittance;
+fees were demanded on entering; and, what was still more unreasonable,
+security for burying me, that expence not coming into the letter of the
+charity. A guinea was the stipulated sum--I could as soon have raised a
+million; and I was afraid to apply to the parish for an order, lest they
+should have passed me, I knew not whither. The poor woman at whose house
+I lodged, compassionating my state, got me into the hospital; and the
+family where I received the hurt, sent me five shillings, three and
+six-pence of which I gave at my admittance--I know not for what.
+
+"My leg grew quickly better; but I was dismissed before my cure was
+completed, because I could not afford to have my linen washed to appear
+decently, as the virago of a nurse said, when the gentlemen (the
+surgeons) came. I cannot give you an adequate idea of the wretchedness of
+an hospital; every thing is left to the care of people intent on gain.
+The attendants seem to have lost all feeling of compassion in the
+bustling discharge of their offices; death is so familiar to them, that
+they are not anxious to ward it off. Every thing appeared to be conducted
+for the accommodation of the medical men and their pupils, who came to
+make experiments on the poor, for the benefit of the rich. One of the
+physicians, I must not forget to mention, gave me half-a-crown, and
+ordered me some wine, when I was at the lowest ebb. I thought of making
+my case known to the lady-like matron; but her forbidding countenance
+prevented me. She condescended to look on the patients, and make general
+enquiries, two or three times a week; but the nurses knew the hour when
+the visit of ceremony would commence, and every thing was as it should
+be.
+
+"After my dismission, I was more at a loss than ever for a subsistence,
+and, not to weary you with a repetition of the same unavailing attempts,
+unable to stand at the washing-tub, I began to consider the rich and poor
+as natural enemies, and became a thief from principle. I could not now
+cease to reason, but I hated mankind. I despised myself, yet I justified
+my conduct. I was taken, tried, and condemned to six months' imprisonment
+in a house of correction. My soul recoils with horror from the
+remembrance of the insults I had to endure, till, branded with shame, I
+was turned loose in the street, pennyless. I wandered from street to
+street, till, exhausted by hunger and fatigue, I sunk down senseless at a
+door, where I had vainly demanded a morsel of bread. I was sent by the
+inhabitant to the work-house, to which he had surlily bid me go, saying,
+he 'paid enough in conscience to the poor,' when, with parched tongue, I
+implored his charity. If those well-meaning people who exclaim against
+beggars, were acquainted with the treatment the poor receive in many of
+these wretched asylums, they would not stifle so easily involuntary
+sympathy, by saying that they have all parishes to go to, or wonder that
+the poor dread to enter the gloomy walls. What are the common run of
+work-houses, but prisons, in which many respectable old people, worn out
+by immoderate labour, sink into the grave in sorrow, to which they are
+carried like dogs!"
+
+Alarmed by some indistinct noise, Jemima rose hastily to listen, and
+Maria, turning to Darnford, said, "I have indeed been shocked beyond
+expression when I have met a pauper's funeral. A coffin carried on the
+shoulders of three or four ill-looking wretches, whom the imagination
+might easily convert into a band of assassins, hastening to conceal the
+corpse, and quarrelling about the prey on their way. I know it is of
+little consequence how we are consigned to the earth; but I am led by
+this brutal insensibility, to what even the animal creation appears
+forcibly to feel, to advert to the wretched, deserted manner in which
+they died."
+
+"True," rejoined Darnford, "and, till the rich will give more than a part
+of their wealth, till they will give time and attention to the wants of
+the distressed, never let them boast of charity. Let them open their
+hearts, and not their purses, and employ their minds in the service, if
+they are really actuated by humanity; or charitable institutions will
+always be the prey of the lowest order of knaves."
+
+Jemima returning, seemed in haste to finish her tale. "The overseer
+farmed the poor of different parishes, and out of the bowels of poverty
+was wrung the money with which he purchased this dwelling, as a private
+receptacle for madness. He had been a keeper at a house of the same
+description, and conceived that he could make money much more readily in
+his old occupation. He is a shrewd--shall I say it?--villain. He observed
+something resolute in my manner, and offered to take me with him, and
+instruct me how to treat the disturbed minds he meant to intrust to my
+care. The offer of forty pounds a year, and to quit a workhouse, was not
+to be despised, though the condition of shutting my eyes and hardening my
+heart was annexed to it.
+
+"I agreed to accompany him; and four years have I been attendant on many
+wretches, and"--she lowered her voice,--"the witness of many enormities.
+In solitude my mind seemed to recover its force, and many of the
+sentiments which I imbibed in the only tolerable period of my life,
+returned with their full force. Still what should induce me to be the
+champion for suffering humanity?--Who ever risked any thing for me?--Who
+ever acknowledged me to be a fellow-creature?"--
+
+Maria took her hand, and Jemima, more overcome by kindness than she had
+ever been by cruelty, hastened out of the room to conceal her emotions.
+
+Darnford soon after heard his summons, and, taking leave of him, Maria
+promised to gratify his curiosity, with respect to herself, the first
+opportunity.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[114-A] The copy which appears to have received the author's last
+corrections, ends at this place.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. VI.
+
+
+ACTIVE as love was in the heart of Maria, the story she had just heard
+made her thoughts take a wider range. The opening buds of hope closed, as
+if they had put forth too early, and the the happiest day of her life was
+overcast by the most melancholy reflections. Thinking of Jemima's
+peculiar fate and her own, she was led to consider the oppressed state of
+women, and to lament that she had given birth to a daughter. Sleep fled
+from her eyelids, while she dwelt on the wretchedness of unprotected
+infancy, till sympathy with Jemima changed to agony, when it seemed
+probable that her own babe might even now be in the very state she so
+forcibly described.
+
+Maria thought, and thought again. Jemima's humanity had rather been
+benumbed than killed, by the keen frost she had to brave at her entrance
+into life; an appeal then to her feelings, on this tender point, surely
+would not be fruitless; and Maria began to anticipate the delight it
+would afford her to gain intelligence of her child. This project was now
+the only subject of reflection; and she watched impatiently for the dawn
+of day, with that determinate purpose which generally insures success.
+
+At the usual hour, Jemima brought her breakfast, and a tender note from
+Darnford. She ran her eye hastily over it, and her heart calmly hoarded
+up the rapture a fresh assurance of affection, affection such as she
+wished to inspire, gave her, without diverting her mind a moment from its
+design. While Jemima waited to take away the breakfast, Maria alluded to
+the reflections, that had haunted her during the night to the exclusion
+of sleep. She spoke with energy of Jemima's unmerited sufferings, and of
+the fate of a number of deserted females, placed within the sweep of a
+whirlwind, from which it was next to impossible to escape. Perceiving the
+effect her conversation produced on the countenance of her guard, she
+grasped the arm of Jemima with that irresistible warmth which defies
+repulse, exclaiming--"With your heart, and such dreadful experience, can
+you lend your aid to deprive my babe of a mother's tenderness, a mother's
+care? In the name of God, assist me to snatch her from destruction! Let
+me but give her an education--let me but prepare her body and mind to
+encounter the ills which await her sex, and I will teach her to consider
+you as her second mother, and herself as the prop of your age. Yes,
+Jemima, look at me--observe me closely, and read my very soul; you merit
+a better fate;" she held out her hand with a firm gesture of assurance;
+"and I will procure it for you, as a testimony of my esteem, as well as
+of my gratitude."
+
+Jemima had not power to resist this persuasive torrent; and, owning that
+the house in which she was confined, was situated on the banks of the
+Thames, only a few miles from London, and not on the sea-coast, as
+Darnford had supposed, she promised to invent some excuse for her
+absence, and go herself to trace the situation, and enquire concerning
+the health, of this abandoned daughter. Her manner implied an intention
+to do something more, but she seemed unwilling to impart her design; and
+Maria, glad to have obtained the main point, thought it best to leave her
+to the workings of her own mind; convinced that she had the power of
+interesting her still more in favour of herself and child, by a simple
+recital of facts.
+
+In the evening, Jemima informed the impatient mother, that on the morrow
+she should hasten to town before the family hour of rising, and received
+all the information necessary, as a clue to her search. The "Good night!"
+Maria uttered was peculiarly solemn and affectionate. Glad expectation
+sparkled in her eye; and, for the first time since her detention, she
+pronounced the name of her child with pleasureable fondness; and, with
+all the garrulity of a nurse, described her first smile when she
+recognized her mother. Recollecting herself, a still kinder "Adieu!" with
+a "God bless you!"--that seemed to include a maternal benediction,
+dismissed Jemima.
+
+The dreary solitude of the ensuing day, lengthened by impatiently
+dwelling on the same idea, was intolerably wearisome. She listened for
+the sound of a particular clock, which some directions of the wind
+allowed her to hear distinctly. She marked the shadow gaining on the
+wall; and, twilight thickening into darkness, her breath seemed oppressed
+while she anxiously counted nine.--The last sound was a stroke of
+despair on her heart; for she expected every moment, without seeing
+Jemima, to have her light extinguished by the savage female who supplied
+her place. She was even obliged to prepare for bed, restless as she was,
+not to disoblige her new attendant. She had been cautioned not to speak
+too freely to her; but the caution was needless, her countenance would
+still more emphatically have made her shrink back. Such was the ferocity
+of manner, conspicuous in every word and gesture of this hag, that Maria
+was afraid to enquire, why Jemima, who had faithfully promised to see her
+before her door was shut for the night, came not?--and, when the key
+turned in the lock, to consign her to a night of suspence, she felt a
+degree of anguish which the circumstances scarcely justified.
+
+Continually on the watch, the shutting of a door, or the sound of a
+footstep, made her start and tremble with apprehension, something like
+what she felt, when, at her entrance, dragged along the gallery, she
+began to doubt whether she were not surrounded by demons?
+
+Fatigued by an endless rotation of thought and wild alarms, she looked
+like a spectre, when Jemima entered in the morning; especially as her
+eyes darted out of her head, to read in Jemima's countenance, almost as
+pallid, the intelligence she dared not trust her tongue to demand. Jemima
+put down the tea-things, and appeared very busy in arranging the table.
+Maria took up a cup with trembling hand, then forcibly recovering her
+fortitude, and restraining the convulsive movement which agitated the
+muscles of her mouth, she said, "Spare yourself the pain of preparing me
+for your information, I adjure you!--My child is dead!" Jemima solemnly
+answered, "Yes;" with a look expressive of compassion and angry emotions.
+"Leave me," added Maria, making a fresh effort to govern her feelings,
+and hiding her face in her handkerchief, to conceal her anguish--"It is
+enough--I know that my babe is no more--I will hear the particulars when
+I am"--_calmer_, she could not utter; and Jemima, without importuning her
+by idle attempts to console her, left the room.
+
+Plunged in the deepest melancholy, she would not admit Darnford's visits;
+and such is the force of early associations even on strong minds, that,
+for a while, she indulged the superstitious notion that she was justly
+punished by the death of her child, for having for an instant ceased to
+regret her loss. Two or three letters from Darnford, full of soothing,
+manly tenderness, only added poignancy to these accusing emotions; yet
+the passionate style in which he expressed, what he termed the first and
+fondest wish of his heart, "that his affection might make her some amends
+for the cruelty and injustice she had endured," inspired a sentiment of
+gratitude to heaven; and her eyes filled with delicious tears, when, at
+the conclusion of his letter, wishing to supply the place of her unworthy
+relations, whose want of principle he execrated, he assured her, calling
+her his dearest girl, "that it should henceforth be the business of his
+life to make her happy."
+
+He begged, in a note sent the following morning, to be permitted to see
+her, when his presence would be no intrusion on her grief; and so
+earnestly intreated to be allowed, according to promise, to beguile the
+tedious moments of absence, by dwelling on the events of her past life,
+that she sent him the memoirs which had been written for her daughter,
+promising Jemima the perusal as soon as he returned them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. VII.
+
+
+"ADDRESSING these memoirs to you, my child, uncertain whether I shall
+ever have an opportunity of instructing you, many observations will
+probably flow from my heart, which only a mother--a mother schooled in
+misery, could make.
+
+"The tenderness of a father who knew the world, might be great; but could
+it equal that of a mother--of a mother, labouring under a portion of the
+misery, which the constitution of society seems to have entailed on all
+her kind? It is, my child, my dearest daughter, only such a mother, who
+will dare to break through all restraint to provide for your
+happiness--who will voluntarily brave censure herself, to ward off
+sorrow from your bosom. From my narrative, my dear girl, you may gather
+the instruction, the counsel, which is meant rather to exercise than
+influence your mind.--Death may snatch me from you, before you can weigh
+my advice, or enter into my reasoning: I would then, with fond anxiety,
+lead you very early in life to form your grand principle of action, to
+save you from the vain regret of having, through irresolution, let the
+spring-tide of existence pass away, unimproved, unenjoyed.--Gain
+experience--ah! gain it--while experience is worth having, and acquire
+sufficient fortitude to pursue your own happiness; it includes your
+utility, by a direct path. What is wisdom too often, but the owl of the
+goddess, who sits moping in a desolated heart; around me she shrieks,
+but I would invite all the gay warblers of spring to nestle in your
+blooming bosom.--Had I not wasted years in deliberating, after I ceased
+to doubt, how I ought to have acted--I might now be useful and
+happy.--For my sake, warned by my example, always appear what you are,
+and you will not pass through existence without enjoying its genuine
+blessings, love and respect.
+
+"Born in one of the most romantic parts of England, an enthusiastic
+fondness for the varying charms of nature is the first sentiment I
+recollect; or rather it was the first consciousness of pleasure that
+employed and formed my imagination.
+
+"My father had been a captain of a man of war; but, disgusted with the
+service, on account of the preferment of men whose chief merit was their
+family connections or borough interest, he retired into the country; and,
+not knowing what to do with himself--married. In his family, to regain
+his lost consequence, he determined to keep up the same passive
+obedience, as in the vessels in which he had commanded. His orders were
+not to be disputed; and the whole house was expected to fly, at the word
+of command, as if to man the shrouds, or mount aloft in an elemental
+strife, big with life or death. He was to be instantaneously obeyed,
+especially by my mother, whom he very benevolently married for love; but
+took care to remind her of the obligation, when she dared, in the
+slightest instance, to question his absolute authority. My eldest
+brother, it is true, as he grew up, was treated with more respect by my
+father; and became in due form the deputy-tyrant of the house. The
+representative of my father, a being privileged by nature--a boy, and the
+darling of my mother, he did not fail to act like an heir apparent. Such
+indeed was my mother's extravagant partiality, that, in comparison with
+her affection for him, she might be said not to love the rest of her
+children. Yet none of the children seemed to have so little affection for
+her. Extreme indulgence had rendered him so selfish, that he only thought
+of himself; and from tormenting insects and animals, he became the despot
+of his brothers, and still more of his sisters.
+
+"It is perhaps difficult to give you an idea of the petty cares which
+obscured the morning of my life; continual restraint in the most trivial
+matters; unconditional submission to orders, which, as a mere child, I
+soon discovered to be unreasonable, because inconsistent and
+contradictory. Thus are we destined to experience a mixture of
+bitterness, with the recollection of our most innocent enjoyments.
+
+"The circumstances which, during my childhood, occurred to fashion my
+mind, were various; yet, as it would probably afford me more pleasure to
+revive the fading remembrance of new-born delight, than you, my child,
+could feel in the perusal, I will not entice you to stray with me into
+the verdant meadow, to search for the flowers that youthful hopes scatter
+in every path; though, as I write, I almost scent the fresh green of
+spring--of that spring which never returns!
+
+"I had two sisters, and one brother, younger than myself; my brother
+Robert was two years older, and might truly be termed the idol of his
+parents, and the torment of the rest of the family. Such indeed is the
+force of prejudice, that what was called spirit and wit in him, was
+cruelly repressed as forwardness in me.
+
+"My mother had an indolence of character, which prevented her from paying
+much attention to our education. But the healthy breeze of a neighbouring
+heath, on which we bounded at pleasure, volatilized the humours that
+improper food might have generated. And to enjoy open air and freedom,
+was paradise, after the unnatural restraint of our fire-side, where we
+were often obliged to sit three or four hours together, without daring to
+utter a word, when my father was out of humour, from want of employment,
+or of a variety of boisterous amusement. I had however one advantage, an
+instructor, the brother of my father, who, intended for the church, had
+of course received a liberal education. But, becoming attached to a young
+lady of great beauty and large fortune, and acquiring in the world some
+opinions not consonant with the profession for which he was designed, he
+accepted, with the most sanguine expectations of success, the offer of a
+nobleman to accompany him to India, as his confidential secretary.
+
+"A correspondence was regularly kept up with the object of his affection;
+and the intricacies of business, peculiarly wearisome to a man of a
+romantic turn of mind, contributed, with a forced absence, to increase
+his attachment. Every other passion was lost in this master-one, and
+only served to swell the torrent. Her relations, such were his waking
+dreams, who had despised him, would court in their turn his alliance, and
+all the blandishments of taste would grace the triumph of love.--While he
+basked in the warm sunshine of love, friendship also promised to shed its
+dewy freshness; for a friend, whom he loved next to his mistress, was the
+confident, who forwarded the letters from one to the other, to elude the
+observation of prying relations. A friend false in similar circumstances,
+is, my dearest girl, an old tale; yet, let not this example, or the
+frigid caution of cold-blooded moralists, make you endeavour to stifle
+hopes, which are the buds that naturally unfold themselves during the
+spring of life! Whilst your own heart is sincere, always expect to meet
+one glowing with the same sentiments; for to fly from pleasure, is not to
+avoid pain!
+
+"My uncle realized, by good luck, rather than management, a handsome
+fortune; and returning on the wings of love, lost in the most enchanting
+reveries, to England, to share it with his mistress and his friend, he
+found them--united.
+
+"There were some circumstances, not necessary for me to recite, which
+aggravated the guilt of the friend beyond measure, and the deception,
+that had been carried on to the last moment, was so base, it produced the
+most violent effect on my uncle's health and spirits. His native country,
+the world! lately a garden of blooming sweets, blasted by treachery,
+seemed changed into a parched desert, the abode of hissing serpents.
+Disappointment rankled in his heart; and, brooding over his wrongs, he
+was attacked by a raging fever, followed by a derangement of mind, which
+only gave place to habitual melancholy, as he recovered more strength of
+body.
+
+"Declaring an intention never to marry, his relations were ever
+clustering about him, paying the grossest adulation to a man, who,
+disgusted with mankind, received them with scorn, or bitter sarcasms.
+Something in my countenance pleased him, when I began to prattle. Since
+his return, he appeared dead to affection; but I soon, by showing him
+innocent fondness, became a favourite; and endeavouring to enlarge and
+strengthen my mind, I grew dear to him in proportion as I imbibed his
+sentiments. He had a forcible manner of speaking, rendered more so by a
+certain impressive wildness of look and gesture, calculated to engage the
+attention of a young and ardent mind. It is not then surprising that I
+quickly adopted his opinions in preference, and reverenced him as one of
+a superior order of beings. He inculcated, with great warmth,
+self-respect, and a lofty consciousness of acting right, independent of
+the censure or applause of the world; nay, he almost taught me to brave,
+and even despise its censure, when convinced of the rectitude of my own
+intentions.
+
+"Endeavouring to prove to me that nothing which deserved the name of love
+or friendship, existed in the world, he drew such animated pictures of
+his own feelings, rendered permanent by disappointment, as imprinted the
+sentiments strongly on my heart, and animated my imagination. These
+remarks are necessary to elucidate some peculiarities in my character,
+which by the world are indefinitely termed romantic.
+
+"My uncle's increasing affection led him to visit me often. Still, unable
+to rest in any place, he did not remain long in the country to soften
+domestic tyranny; but he brought me books, for which I had a passion, and
+they conspired with his conversation, to make me form an ideal picture of
+life. I shall pass over the tyranny of my father, much as I suffered from
+it; but it is necessary to notice, that it undermined my mother's health;
+and that her temper, continually irritated by domestic bickering, became
+intolerably peevish.
+
+"My eldest brother was articled to a neighbouring attorney, the
+shrewdest, and, I may add, the most unprincipled man in that part of the
+country. As my brother generally came home every Saturday, to astonish my
+mother by exhibiting his attainments, he gradually assumed a right of
+directing the whole family, not excepting my father. He seemed to take a
+peculiar pleasure in tormenting and humbling me; and if I ever ventured
+to complain of this treatment to either my father or mother, I was rudely
+rebuffed for presuming to judge of the conduct of my eldest brother.
+
+"About this period a merchant's family came to settle in our
+neighbourhood. A mansion-house in the village, lately purchased, had been
+preparing the whole spring, and the sight of the costly furniture, sent
+from London, had excited my mother's envy, and roused my father's pride.
+My sensations were very different, and all of a pleasurable kind. I
+longed to see new characters, to break the tedious monotony of my life;
+and to find a friend, such as fancy had pourtrayed. I cannot then
+describe the emotion I felt, the Sunday they made their appearance at
+church. My eyes were rivetted on the pillar round which I expected first
+to catch a glimpse of them, and darted forth to meet a servant who
+hastily preceded a group of ladies, whose white robes and waving plumes,
+seemed to stream along the gloomy aisle, diffusing the light, by which I
+contemplated their figures.
+
+"We visited them in form; and I quickly selected the eldest daughter for
+my friend. The second son, George, paid me particular attention, and
+finding his attainments and manners superior to those of the young men of
+the village, I began to imagine him superior to the rest of mankind. Had
+my home been more comfortable, or my previous acquaintance more numerous,
+I should not probably have been so eager to open my heart to new
+affections.
+
+"Mr. Venables, the merchant, had acquired a large fortune by unremitting
+attention to business; but his health declining rapidly, he was obliged
+to retire, before his son, George, had acquired sufficient experience, to
+enable him to conduct their affairs on the same prudential plan, his
+father had invariably pursued. Indeed, he had laboured to throw off his
+authority, having despised his narrow plans and cautious speculation. The
+eldest son could not be prevailed on to enter the firm; and, to oblige
+his wife, and have peace in the house, Mr. Venables had purchased a
+commission for him in the guards.
+
+"I am now alluding to circumstances which came to my knowledge long
+after; but it is necessary, my dearest child, that you should know the
+character of your father, to prevent your despising your mother; the only
+parent inclined to discharge a parent's duty. In London, George had
+acquired habits of libertinism, which he carefully concealed from his
+father and his commercial connections. The mask he wore, was so complete
+a covering of his real visage, that the praise his father lavished on his
+conduct, and, poor mistaken man! on his principles, contrasted with his
+brother's, rendered the notice he took of me peculiarly flattering.
+Without any fixed design, as I am now convinced, he continued to single
+me out at the dance, press my hand at parting, and utter expressions of
+unmeaning passion, to which I gave a meaning naturally suggested by the
+romantic turn of my thoughts. His stay in the country was short; his
+manners did not entirely please me; but, when he left us, the colouring
+of my picture became more vivid--Whither did not my imagination lead me?
+In short, I fancied myself in love--in love with the disinterestedness,
+fortitude, generosity, dignity, and humanity, with which I had invested
+the hero I dubbed. A circumstance which soon after occurred, rendered all
+these virtues palpable. [The incident is perhaps worth relating on other
+accounts, and therefore I shall describe it distinctly.]
+
+"I had a great affection for my nurse, old Mary, for whom I used often to
+work, to spare her eyes. Mary had a younger sister, married to a sailor,
+while she was suckling me; for my mother only suckled my eldest brother,
+which might be the cause of her extraordinary partiality. Peggy, Mary's
+sister, lived with her, till her husband, becoming a mate in a West-India
+trader, got a little before-hand in the world. He wrote to his wife from
+the first port in the Channel, after his most successful voyage, to
+request her to come to London to meet him; he even wished her to
+determine on living there for the future, to save him the trouble of
+coming to her the moment he came on shore; and to turn a penny by
+keeping a green-stall. It was too much to set out on a journey the
+moment he had finished a voyage, and fifty miles by land, was worse than
+a thousand leagues by sea.
+
+"She packed up her alls, and came to London--but did not meet honest
+Daniel. A common misfortune prevented her, and the poor are bound to
+suffer for the good of their country--he was pressed in the river--and
+never came on shore.
+
+"Peggy was miserable in London, not knowing, as she said, 'the face of
+any living soul.' Besides, her imagination had been employed,
+anticipating a month or six weeks' happiness with her husband. Daniel was
+to have gone with her to Sadler's Wells, and Westminster Abbey, and to
+many sights, which he knew she never heard of in the country. Peggy too
+was thrifty, and how could she manage to put his plan in execution
+alone? He had acquaintance; but she did not know the very name of their
+places of abode. His letters were made up of--How do you does, and God
+bless yous,--information was reserved for the hour of meeting.
+
+"She too had her portion of information, near at heart. Molly and Jacky
+were grown such little darlings, she was almost angry that daddy did not
+see their tricks. She had not half the pleasure she should have had from
+their prattle, could she have recounted to him each night the pretty
+speeches of the day. Some stories, however, were stored up--and Jacky
+could say papa with such a sweet voice, it must delight his heart. Yet
+when she came, and found no Daniel to greet her, when Jacky called papa,
+she wept, bidding 'God bless his innocent soul, that did not know what
+sorrow was.'--But more sorrow was in store for Peggy, innocent as she
+was.--Daniel was killed in the first engagement, and then the _papa_ was
+agony, sounding to the heart.
+
+"She had lived sparingly on his wages, while there was any hope of his
+return; but, that gone, she returned with a breaking heart to the
+country, to a little market town, nearly three miles from our village.
+She did not like to go to service, to be snubbed about, after being her
+own mistress. To put her children out to nurse was impossible: how far
+would her wages go? and to send them to her husband's parish, a distant
+one, was to lose her husband twice over.
+
+"I had heard all from Mary, and made my uncle furnish a little cottage
+for her, to enable her to sell--so sacred was poor Daniel's advice, now
+he was dead and gone--a little fruit, toys and cakes. The minding of the
+shop did not require her whole time, nor even the keeping her children
+clean, and she loved to see them clean; so she took in washing, and
+altogether made a shift to earn bread for her children, still weeping for
+Daniel, when Jacky's arch looks made her think of his father.--It was
+pleasant to work for her children.--'Yes; from morning till night, could
+she have had a kiss from their father, God rest his soul! Yes; had it
+pleased Providence to have let him come back without a leg or an arm, it
+would have been the same thing to her--for she did not love him because
+he maintained them--no; she had hands of her own.'
+
+"The country people were honest, and Peggy left her linen out to dry very
+late. A recruiting party, as she supposed, passing through, made free
+with a large wash; for it was all swept away, including her own and her
+children's little stock.
+
+"This was a dreadful blow; two dozen of shirts, stocks and handkerchiefs.
+She gave the money which she had laid by for half a year's rent, and
+promised to pay two shillings a week till all was cleared; so she did not
+lose her employment. This two shillings a week, and the buying a few
+necessaries for the children, drove her so hard, that she had not a penny
+to pay her rent with, when a twelvemonth's became due.
+
+"She was now with Mary, and had just told her tale, which Mary instantly
+repeated--it was intended for my ear. Many houses in this town, producing
+a borough-interest, were included in the estate purchased by Mr.
+Venables, and the attorney with whom my brother lived, was appointed his
+agent, to collect and raise the rents.
+
+"He demanded Peggy's, and, in spite of her intreaties, her poor goods had
+been seized and sold. So that she had not, and what was worse her
+children, 'for she had known sorrow enough,' a bed to lie on. She knew
+that I was good-natured--right charitable, yet not liking to ask for more
+than needs must, she scorned to petition while people could any how be
+made to wait. But now, should she be turned out of doors, she must
+expect nothing less than to lose all her customers, and then she must
+beg or starve--and what would become of her children?--'had Daniel not
+been pressed--but God knows best--all this could not have happened.'
+
+"I had two mattrasses on my bed; what did I want with two, when such a
+worthy creature must lie on the ground? My mother would be angry, but I
+could conceal it till my uncle came down; and then I would tell him all
+the whole truth, and if he absolved me, heaven would.
+
+"I begged the house-maid to come up stairs with me (servants always feel
+for the distresses of poverty, and so would the rich if they knew what it
+was). She assisted me to tie up the mattrass; I discovering, at the same
+time, that one blanket would serve me till winter, could I persuade my
+sister, who slept with me, to keep my secret. She entering in the midst
+of the package, I gave her some new feathers, to silence her. We got the
+mattrass down the back stairs, unperceived, and I helped to carry it,
+taking with me all the money I had, and what I could borrow from my
+sister.
+
+"When I got to the cottage, Peggy declared that she would not take what I
+had brought secretly; but, when, with all the eager eloquence inspired by
+a decided purpose, I grasped her hand with weeping eyes, assuring her
+that my uncle would screen me from blame, when he was once more in the
+country, describing, at the same time, what she would suffer in parting
+with her children, after keeping them so long from being thrown on the
+parish, she reluctantly consented.
+
+"My project of usefulness ended not here; I determined to speak to the
+attorney; he frequently paid me compliments. His character did not
+intimidate me; but, imagining that Peggy must be mistaken, and that no
+man could turn a deaf ear to such a tale of complicated distress, I
+determined to walk to the town with Mary the next morning, and request
+him to wait for the rent, and keep my secret, till my uncle's return.
+
+"My repose was sweet; and, waking with the first dawn of day, I bounded
+to Mary's cottage. What charms do not a light heart spread over nature!
+Every bird that twittered in a bush, every flower that enlivened the
+hedge, seemed placed there to awaken me to rapture--yes; to rapture. The
+present moment was full fraught with happiness; and on futurity I
+bestowed not a thought, excepting to anticipate my success with the
+attorney.
+
+"This man of the world, with rosy face and simpering features, received
+me politely, nay kindly; listened with complacency to my remonstrances,
+though he scarcely heeded Mary's tears. I did not then suspect, that my
+eloquence was in my complexion, the blush of seventeen, or that, in a
+world where humanity to women is the characteristic of advancing
+civilization, the beauty of a young girl was so much more interesting
+than the distress of an old one. Pressing my hand, he promised to let
+Peggy remain in the house as long as I wished.--I more than returned the
+pressure--I was so grateful and so happy. Emboldened by my innocent
+warmth, he then kissed me--and I did not draw back--I took it for a kiss
+of charity.
+
+"Gay as a lark, I went to dine at Mr. Venables'. I had previously
+obtained five shillings from my father, towards re-clothing the poor
+children of my care, and prevailed on my mother to take one of the girls
+into the house, whom I determined to teach to work and read.
+
+"After dinner, when the younger part of the circle retired to the music
+room, I recounted with energy my tale; that is, I mentioned Peggy's
+distress, without hinting at the steps I had taken to relieve her. Miss
+Venables gave me half-a-crown; the heir five shillings; but George sat
+unmoved. I was cruelly distressed by the disappointment--I scarcely could
+remain on my chair; and, could I have got out of the room unperceived, I
+should have flown home, as if to run away from myself. After several
+vain attempts to rise, I leaned my head against the marble chimney-piece,
+and gazing on the evergreens that filled the fire-place, moralized on the
+vanity of human expectations; regardless of the company. I was roused by
+a gentle tap on my shoulder from behind Charlotte's chair. I turned my
+head, and George slid a guinea into my hand, putting his finger to his
+mouth, to enjoin me silence.
+
+"What a revolution took place, not only in my train of thoughts, but
+feelings! I trembled with emotion--now, indeed, I was in love. Such
+delicacy too, to enhance his benevolence! I felt in my pocket every five
+minutes, only to feel the guinea; and its magic touch invested my hero
+with more than mortal beauty. My fancy had found a basis to erect its
+model of perfection on; and quickly went to work, with all the happy
+credulity of youth, to consider that heart as devoted to virtue, which
+had only obeyed a virtuous impulse. The bitter experience was yet to
+come, that has taught me how very distinct are the principles of virtue,
+from the casual feelings from which they germinate.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. VIII.
+
+
+"I HAVE perhaps dwelt too long on a circumstance, which is only of
+importance as it marks the progress of a deception that has been so fatal
+to my peace; and introduces to your notice a poor girl, whom, intending
+to serve, I led to ruin. Still it is probable that I was not entirely the
+victim of mistake; and that your father, gradually fashioned by the
+world, did not quickly become what I hesitate to call him--out of respect
+to my daughter.
+
+"But, to hasten to the more busy scenes of my life. Mr. Venables and my
+mother died the same summer; and, wholly engrossed by my attention to
+her, I thought of little else. The neglect of her darling, my brother
+Robert, had a violent effect on her weakened mind; for, though boys may
+be reckoned the pillars of the house without doors, girls are often the
+only comfort within. They but too frequently waste their health and
+spirits attending a dying parent, who leaves them in comparative poverty.
+After closing, with filial piety, a father's eyes, they are chased from
+the paternal roof, to make room for the first-born, the son, who is to
+carry the empty family-name down to posterity; though, occupied with his
+own pleasures, he scarcely thought of discharging, in the decline of his
+parent's life, the debt contracted in his childhood. My mother's conduct
+led me to make these reflections. Great as was the fatigue I endured, and
+the affection my unceasing solicitude evinced, of which my mother seemed
+perfectly sensible, still, when my brother, whom I could hardly persuade
+to remain a quarter of an hour in her chamber, was with her alone, a
+short time before her death, she gave him a little hoard, which she had
+been some years accumulating.
+
+"During my mother's illness, I was obliged to manage my father's temper,
+who, from the lingering nature of her malady, began to imagine that it
+was merely fancy. At this period, an artful kind of upper servant
+attracted my father's attention, and the neighbours made many remarks on
+the finery, not honestly got, exhibited at evening service. But I was too
+much occupied with my mother to observe any change in her dress or
+behaviour, or to listen to the whisper of scandal.
+
+"I shall not dwell on the death-bed scene, lively as is the remembrance,
+or on the emotion produced by the last grasp of my mother's cold hand;
+when blessing me, she added, 'A little patience, and all will be over!'
+Ah! my child, how often have those words rung mournfully in my ears--and
+I have exclaimed--'A little more patience, and I too shall be at rest!'
+
+"My father was violently affected by her death, recollected instances of
+his unkindness, and wept like a child.
+
+"My mother had solemnly recommended my sisters to my care, and bid me be
+a mother to them. They, indeed, became more dear to me as they became
+more forlorn; for, during my mother's illness, I discovered the ruined
+state of my father's circumstances, and that he had only been able to
+keep up appearances, by the sums which he borrowed of my uncle.
+
+"My father's grief, and consequent tenderness to his children, quickly
+abated, the house grew still more gloomy or riotous; and my refuge from
+care was again at Mr. Venables'; the young 'squire having taken his
+father's place, and allowing, for the present, his sister to preside at
+his table. George, though dissatisfied with his portion of the fortune,
+which had till lately been all in trade, visited the family as usual. He
+was now full of speculations in trade, and his brow became clouded by
+care. He seemed to relax in his attention to me, when the presence of my
+uncle gave a new turn to his behaviour. I was too unsuspecting, too
+disinterested, to trace these changes to their source.
+
+My home every day became more and more disagreeable to me; my liberty was
+unnecessarily abridged, and my books, on the pretext that they made me
+idle, taken from me. My father's mistress was with child, and he, doating
+on her, allowed or overlooked her vulgar manner of tyrannizing over us. I
+was indignant, especially when I saw her endeavouring to attract, shall I
+say seduce? my younger brother. By allowing women but one way of rising
+in the world, the fostering the libertinism of men, society makes
+monsters of them, and then their ignoble vices are brought forward as a
+proof of inferiority of intellect.
+
+The wearisomeness of my situation can scarcely be described. Though my
+life had not passed in the most even tenour with my mother, it was
+paradise to that I was destined to endure with my father's mistress,
+jealous of her illegitimate authority. My father's former occasional
+tenderness, in spite of his violence of temper, had been soothing to me;
+but now he only met me with reproofs or portentous frowns. The
+house-keeper, as she was now termed, was the vulgar despot of the family;
+and assuming the new character of a fine lady, she could never forgive
+the contempt which was sometimes visible in my countenance, when she
+uttered with pomposity her bad English, or affected to be well bred.
+
+To my uncle I ventured to open my heart; and he, with his wonted
+benevolence, began to consider in what manner he could extricate me out
+of my present irksome situation. In spite of his own disappointment, or,
+most probably, actuated by the feelings that had been petrified, not
+cooled, in all their sanguine fervour, like a boiling torrent of lava
+suddenly dashing into the sea, he thought a marriage of mutual
+inclination (would envious stars permit it) the only chance for happiness
+in this disastrous world. George Venables had the reputation of being
+attentive to business, and my father's example gave great weight to this
+circumstance; for habits of order in business would, he conceived, extend
+to the regulation of the affections in domestic life. George seldom spoke
+in my uncle's company, except to utter a short, judicious question, or to
+make a pertinent remark, with all due deference to his superior judgment;
+so that my uncle seldom left his company without observing, that the
+young man had more in him than people supposed.
+
+In this opinion he was not singular; yet, believe me, and I am not swayed
+by resentment, these speeches so justly poized, this silent deference,
+when the animal spirits of other young people were throwing off youthful
+ebullitions, were not the effect of thought or humility, but sheer
+barrenness of mind, and want of imagination. A colt of mettle will curvet
+and shew his paces. Yes; my dear girl, these prudent young men want all
+the fire necessary to ferment their faculties, and are characterized as
+wise, only because they are not foolish. It is true, that George was by
+no means so great a favourite of mine as during the first year of our
+acquaintance; still, as he often coincided in opinion with me, and echoed
+my sentiments; and having myself no other attachment, I heard with
+pleasure my uncle's proposal; but thought more of obtaining my freedom,
+than of my lover. But, when George, seemingly anxious for my happiness,
+pressed me to quit my present painful situation, my heart swelled with
+gratitude--I knew not that my uncle had promised him five thousand
+pounds.
+
+Had this truly generous man mentioned his intention to me, I should have
+insisted on a thousand pounds being settled on each of my sisters; George
+would have contested; I should have seen his selfish soul; and--gracious
+God! have been spared the misery of discovering, when too late, that I
+was united to a heartless, unprincipled wretch. All my schemes of
+usefulness would not then have been blasted. The tenderness of my heart
+would not have heated my imagination with visions of the ineffable
+delight of happy love; nor would the sweet duty of a mother have been so
+cruelly interrupted.
+
+But I must not suffer the fortitude I have so hardly acquired, to be
+undermined by unavailing regret. Let me hasten forward to describe the
+turbid stream in which I had to wade--but let me exultingly declare that
+it is passed--my soul holds fellowship with him no more. He cut the
+Gordian knot, which my principles, mistaken ones, respected; he dissolved
+the tie, the fetters rather, that ate into my very vitals--and I should
+rejoice, conscious that my mind is freed, though confined in hell itself;
+the only place that even fancy can imagine more dreadful than my present
+abode.
+
+These varying emotions will not allow me to proceed. I heave sigh after
+sigh; yet my heart is still oppressed. For what am I reserved? Why was I
+not born a man, or why was I born at all?
+
+
+END OF VOL. I.
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT GODWIN.
+
+VOL. II.
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. II.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+
+THE
+
+WRONGS OF WOMAN:
+
+OR,
+
+MARIA.
+
+A FRAGMENT.
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+
+VOL. II.
+
+
+
+
+_WRONGS_
+
+OF
+
+WOMAN.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. IX.
+
+
+"I RESUME my pen to fly from thought. I was married; and we hastened to
+London. I had purposed taking one of my sisters with me; for a strong
+motive for marrying, was the desire of having a home at which I could
+receive them, now their own grew so uncomfortable, as not to deserve the
+cheering appellation. An objection was made to her accompanying me, that
+appeared plausible; and I reluctantly acquiesced. I was however willingly
+allowed to take with me Molly, poor Peggy's daughter. London and
+preferment, are ideas commonly associated in the country; and, as
+blooming as May, she bade adieu to Peggy with weeping eyes. I did not
+even feel hurt at the refusal in relation to my sister, till hearing what
+my uncle had done for me, I had the simplicity to request, speaking with
+warmth of their situation, that he would give them a thousand pounds
+a-piece, which seemed to me but justice. He asked me, giving me a kiss,
+'If I had lost my senses?' I started back, as if I had found a wasp in a
+rose-bush. I expostulated. He sneered; and the demon of discord entered
+our paradise, to poison with his pestiferous breath every opening joy.
+
+"I had sometimes observed defects in my husband's understanding; but, led
+astray by a prevailing opinion, that goodness of disposition is of the
+first importance in the relative situations of life, in proportion as I
+perceived the narrowness of his understanding, fancy enlarged the
+boundary of his heart. Fatal error! How quickly is the so much vaunted
+milkiness of nature turned into gall, by an intercourse with the world,
+if more generous juices do not sustain the vital source of virtue!
+
+"One trait in my character was extreme credulity; but, when my eyes were
+once opened, I saw but too clearly all I had before overlooked. My
+husband was sunk in my esteem; still there are youthful emotions, which,
+for a while, fill up the chasm of love and friendship. Besides, it
+required some time to enable me to see his whole character in a just
+light, or rather to allow it to become fixed. While circumstances were
+ripening my faculties, and cultivating my taste, commerce and gross
+relaxations were shutting his against any possibility of improvement,
+till, by stifling every spark of virtue in himself, he began to imagine
+that it no where existed.
+
+"Do not let me lead you astray, my child, I do not mean to assert, that
+any human being is entirely incapable of feeling the generous emotions,
+which are the foundation of every true principle of virtue; but they are
+frequently, I fear, so feeble, that, like the inflammable quality which
+more or less lurks in all bodies, they often lie for ever dormant; the
+circumstances never occurring, necessary to call them into action.
+
+"I discovered however by chance, that, in consequence of some losses in
+trade, the natural effect of his gambling desire to start suddenly into
+riches, the five thousand pounds given me by my uncle, had been paid very
+opportunely. This discovery, strange as you may think the assertion, gave
+me pleasure; my husband's embarrassments endeared him to me. I was glad
+to find an excuse for his conduct to my sisters, and my mind became
+calmer.
+
+"My uncle introduced me to some literary society; and the theatres were a
+never-failing source of amusement to me. My delighted eye followed Mrs.
+Siddons, when, with dignified delicacy, she played Calista; and I
+involuntarily repeated after her, in the same tone, and with a
+long-drawn sigh,
+
+    'Hearts like our's were pair'd--not match'd.'
+
+"These were, at first, spontaneous emotions, though, becoming acquainted
+with men of wit and polished manners, I could not sometimes help
+regretting my early marriage; and that, in my haste to escape from a
+temporary dependence, and expand my newly fledged wings, in an unknown
+sky, I had been caught in a trap, and caged for life. Still the novelty
+of London, and the attentive fondness of my husband, for he had some
+personal regard for me, made several months glide away. Yet, not
+forgetting the situation of my sisters, who were still very young, I
+prevailed on my uncle to settle a thousand pounds on each; and to place
+them in a school near town, where I could frequently visit, as well as
+have them at home with me.
+
+"I now tried to improve my husband's taste, but we had few subjects in
+common; indeed he soon appeared to have little relish for my society,
+unless he was hinting to me the use he could make of my uncle's wealth.
+When we had company, I was disgusted by an ostentatious display of
+riches, and I have often quitted the room, to avoid listening to
+exaggerated tales of money obtained by lucky hits.
+
+"With all my attention and affectionate interest, I perceived that I
+could not become the friend or confident of my husband. Every thing I
+learned relative to his affairs I gathered up by accident; and I vainly
+endeavoured to establish, at our fire-side, that social converse, which
+often renders people of different characters dear to each other.
+Returning from the theatre, or any amusing party, I frequently began to
+relate what I had seen and highly relished; but with sullen taciturnity
+he soon silenced me. I seemed therefore gradually to lose, in his
+society, the soul, the energies of which had just been in action. To such
+a degree, in fact, did his cold, reserved manner affect me, that, after
+spending some days with him alone, I have imagined myself the most stupid
+creature in the world, till the abilities of some casual visitor
+convinced me that I had some dormant animation, and sentiments above the
+dust in which I had been groveling. The very countenance of my husband
+changed; his complexion became sallow, and all the charms of youth were
+vanishing with its vivacity.
+
+"I give you one view of the subject; but these experiments and
+alterations took up the space of five years; during which period, I had
+most reluctantly extorted several sums from my uncle, to save my husband,
+to use his own words, from destruction. At first it was to prevent bills
+being noted, to the injury of his credit; then to bail him; and
+afterwards to prevent an execution from entering the house. I began at
+last to conclude, that he would have made more exertions of his own to
+extricate himself, had he not relied on mine, cruel as was the task he
+imposed on me; and I firmly determined that I would make use of no more
+pretexts.
+
+"From the moment I pronounced this determination, indifference on his
+part was changed into rudeness, or something worse.
+
+"He now seldom dined at home, and continually returned at a late hour,
+drunk, to bed. I retired to another apartment; I was glad, I own, to
+escape from his; for personal intimacy without affection, seemed, to me
+the most degrading, as well as the most painful state in which a woman of
+any taste, not to speak of the peculiar delicacy of fostered sensibility,
+could be placed. But my husband's fondness for women was of the grossest
+kind, and imagination was so wholly out of the question, as to render his
+indulgences of this sort entirely promiscuous, and of the most brutal
+nature. My health suffered, before my heart was entirely estranged by the
+loathsome information; could I then have returned to his sullied arms,
+but as a victim to the prejudices of mankind, who have made women the
+property of their husbands? I discovered even, by his conversation, when
+intoxicated, that his favourites were wantons of the lowest class, who
+could by their vulgar, indecent mirth, which he called nature, rouse his
+sluggish spirits. Meretricious ornaments and manners were necessary to
+attract his attention. He seldom looked twice at a modest woman, and sat
+silent in their company; and the charms of youth and beauty had not the
+slightest effect on his senses, unless the possessors were initiated in
+vice. His intimacy with profligate women, and his habits of thinking,
+gave him a contempt for female endowments; and he would repeat, when
+wine had loosed his tongue, most of the common-place sarcasms levelled at
+them, by men who do not allow them to have minds, because mind would be
+an impediment to gross enjoyment. Men who are inferior to their fellow
+men, are always most anxious to establish their superiority over women.
+But where are these reflections leading me?
+
+"Women who have lost their husband's affection, are justly reproved for
+neglecting their persons, and not taking the same pains to keep, as to
+gain a heart; but who thinks of giving the same advice to men, though
+women are continually stigmatized for being attached to fops; and from
+the nature of their education, are more susceptible of disgust? Yet why a
+woman should be expected to endure a sloven, with more patience than a
+man, and magnanimously to govern herself, I cannot conceive; unless it be
+supposed arrogant in her to look for respect as well as a maintenance. It
+is not easy to be pleased, because, after promising to love, in different
+circumstances, we are told that it is our duty. I cannot, I am sure
+(though, when attending the sick, I never felt disgust) forget my own
+sensations, when rising with health and spirit, and after scenting the
+sweet morning, I have met my husband at the breakfast table. The active
+attention I had been giving to domestic regulations, which were generally
+settled before he rose, or a walk, gave a glow to my countenance, that
+contrasted with his squallid appearance. The squeamishness of stomach
+alone, produced by the last night's intemperance, which he took no pains
+to conceal, destroyed my appetite. I think I now see him lolling in an
+arm-chair, in a dirty powdering gown, soiled linen, ungartered stockings,
+and tangled hair, yawning and stretching himself. The newspaper was
+immediately called for, if not brought in on the tea-board, from which he
+would scarcely lift his eyes while I poured out the tea, excepting to ask
+for some brandy to put into it, or to declare that he could not eat. In
+answer to any question, in his best humour, it was a drawling 'What do
+you say, child?' But if I demanded money for the house expences, which I
+put off till the last moment, his customary reply, often prefaced with an
+oath, was, 'Do you think me, madam, made of money?'--The butcher, the
+baker, must wait; and, what was worse, I was often obliged to witness
+his surly dismission of tradesmen, who were in want of their money, and
+whom I sometimes paid with the presents my uncle gave me for my own use.
+
+"At this juncture my father's mistress, by terrifying his conscience,
+prevailed on him to marry her; he was already become a methodist; and my
+brother, who now practised for himself, had discovered a flaw in the
+settlement made on my mother's children, which set it aside, and he
+allowed my father, whose distress made him submit to any thing, a tithe
+of his own, or rather our fortune.
+
+"My sisters had left school, but were unable to endure home, which my
+father's wife rendered as disagreeable as possible, to get rid of girls
+whom she regarded as spies on her conduct. They were accomplished, yet
+you can (may you never be reduced to the same destitute state!) scarcely
+conceive the trouble I had to place them in the situation of governesses,
+the only one in which even a well-educated woman, with more than ordinary
+talents, can struggle for a subsistence; and even this is a dependence
+next to menial. Is it then surprising, that so many forlorn women, with
+human passions and feelings, take refuge in infamy? Alone in large
+mansions, I say alone, because they had no companions with whom they
+could converse on equal terms, or from whom they could expect the
+endearments of affection, they grew melancholy, and the sound of joy made
+them sad; and the youngest, having a more delicate frame, fell into a
+decline. It was with great difficulty that I, who now almost supported
+the house by loans from my uncle, could prevail on the _master_ of it, to
+allow her a room to die in. I watched her sick bed for some months, and
+then closed her eyes, gentle spirit! for ever. She was pretty, with very
+engaging manners; yet had never an opportunity to marry, excepting to a
+very old man. She had abilities sufficient to have shone in any
+profession, had there been any professions for women, though she shrunk
+at the name of milliner or mantua-maker as degrading to a gentlewoman. I
+would not term this feeling false pride to any one but you, my child,
+whom I fondly hope to see (yes; I will indulge the hope for a moment!)
+possessed of that energy of character which gives dignity to any station;
+and with that clear, firm spirit that will enable you to choose a
+situation for yourself, or submit to be classed in the lowest, if it be
+the only one in which you can be the mistress of your own actions.
+
+"Soon after the death of my sister, an incident occurred, to prove to me
+that the heart of a libertine is dead to natural affection; and to
+convince me, that the being who has appeared all tenderness, to gratify a
+selfish passion, is as regardless of the innocent fruit of it, as of the
+object, when the fit is over. I had casually observed an old,
+mean-looking woman, who called on my husband every two or three months to
+receive some money. One day entering the passage of his little
+counting-house, as she was going out, I heard her say, 'The child is very
+weak; she cannot live long, she will soon die out of your way, so you
+need not grudge her a little physic.'
+
+"'So much the better,' he replied, 'and pray mind your own business, good
+woman.'
+
+"I was struck by his unfeeling, inhuman tone of voice, and drew back,
+determined when the woman came again, to try to speak to her, not out of
+curiosity, I had heard enough, but with the hope of being useful to a
+poor, outcast girl.
+
+"A month or two elapsed before I saw this woman again; and then she had a
+child in her hand that tottered along, scarcely able to sustain her own
+weight. They were going away, to return at the hour Mr. Venables was
+expected; he was now from home. I desired the woman to walk into the
+parlour. She hesitated, yet obeyed. I assured her that I should not
+mention to my husband (the word seemed to weigh on my respiration), that
+I had seen her, or his child. The woman stared at me with astonishment;
+and I turned my eyes on the squalid object [that accompanied her.] She
+could hardly support herself, her complexion was sallow, and her eyes
+inflamed, with an indescribable look of cunning, mixed with the wrinkles
+produced by the peevishness of pain.
+
+"'Poor child!' I exclaimed. 'Ah! you may well say poor child,' replied
+the woman. 'I brought her here to see whether he would have the heart to
+look at her, and not get some advice. I do not know what they deserve who
+nursed her. Why, her legs bent under her like a bow when she came to me,
+and she has never been well since; but, if they were no better paid than
+I am, it is not to be wondered at, sure enough.'
+
+"On further enquiry I was informed, that this miserable spectacle was the
+daughter of a servant, a country girl, who caught Mr. Venables' eye, and
+whom he seduced. On his marriage he sent her away, her situation being
+too visible. After her delivery, she was thrown on the town; and died in
+an hospital within the year. The babe was sent to a parish-nurse, and
+afterwards to this woman, who did not seem much better; but what was to
+be expected from such a close bargain? She was only paid three shillings
+a week for board and washing.
+
+"The woman begged me to give her some old clothes for the child, assuring
+me, that she was almost afraid to ask master for money to buy even a
+pair of shoes.
+
+"I grew sick at heart. And, fearing Mr. Venables might enter, and oblige
+me to express my abhorrence, I hastily enquired where she lived, promised
+to pay her two shillings a week more, and to call on her in a day or two;
+putting a trifle into her hand as a proof of my good intention.
+
+"If the state of this child affected me, what were my feelings at a
+discovery I made respecting Peggy----?[22-A]
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[22-A] The manuscript is imperfect here. An episode seems to have been
+intended, which was never committed to paper.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. X.
+
+
+"MY father's situation was now so distressing, that I prevailed on my
+uncle to accompany me to visit him; and to lend me his assistance, to
+prevent the whole property of the family from becoming the prey of my
+brother's rapacity; for, to extricate himself out of present
+difficulties, my father was totally regardless of futurity. I took down
+with me some presents for my step-mother; it did not require an effort
+for me to treat her with civility, or to forget the past.
+
+"This was the first time I had visited my native village, since my
+marriage. But with what different emotions did I return from the busy
+world, with a heavy weight of experience benumbing my imagination, to
+scenes, that whispered recollections of joy and hope most eloquently to
+my heart! The first scent of the wild flowers from the heath, thrilled
+through my veins, awakening every sense to pleasure. The icy hand of
+despair seemed to be removed from my bosom; and--forgetting my
+husband--the nurtured visions of a romantic mind, bursting on me with all
+their original wildness and gay exuberance, were again hailed as sweet
+realities. I forgot, with equal facility, that I ever felt sorrow, or
+knew care in the country; while a transient rainbow stole athwart the
+cloudy sky of despondency. The picturesque form of several favourite
+trees, and the porches of rude cottages, with their smiling hedges, were
+recognized with the gladsome playfulness of childish vivacity. I could
+have kissed the chickens that pecked on the common; and longed to pat the
+cows, and frolic with the dogs that sported on it. I gazed with delight
+on the windmill, and thought it lucky that it should be in motion, at the
+moment I passed by; and entering the dear green lane, which led directly
+to the village, the sound of the well-known rookery gave that sentimental
+tinge to the varying sensations of my active soul, which only served to
+heighten the lustre of the luxuriant scenery. But, spying, as I advanced,
+the spire, peeping over the withered tops of the aged elms that composed
+the rookery, my thoughts flew immediately to the church-yard, and tears
+of affection, such was the effect of my imagination, bedewed my mother's
+grave! Sorrow gave place to devotional feelings. I wandered through the
+church in fancy, as I used sometimes to do on a Saturday evening. I
+recollected with what fervour I addressed the God of my youth: and once
+more with rapturous love looked above my sorrows to the Father of nature.
+I pause--feeling forcibly all the emotions I am describing; and
+(reminded, as I register my sorrows, of the sublime calm I have felt,
+when in some tremendous solitude, my soul rested on itself, and seemed to
+fill the universe) I insensibly breathe soft, hushing every wayward
+emotion, as if fearing to sully with a sigh, a contentment so extatic.
+
+"Having settled my father's affairs, and, by my exertions in his favour,
+made my brother my sworn foe, I returned to London. My husband's conduct
+was now changed; I had during my absence, received several affectionate,
+penitential letters from him; and he seemed on my arrival, to wish by his
+behaviour to prove his sincerity. I could not then conceive why he acted
+thus; and, when the suspicion darted into my head, that it might arise
+from observing my increasing influence with my uncle, I almost despised
+myself for imagining that such a degree of debasing selfishness could
+exist.
+
+"He became, unaccountable as was the change, tender and attentive; and,
+attacking my weak side, made a confession of his follies, and lamented
+the embarrassments in which I, who merited a far different fate, might be
+involved. He besought me to aid him with my counsel, praised my
+understanding, and appealed to the tenderness of my heart.
+
+"This conduct only inspired me with compassion. I wished to be his
+friend; but love had spread his rosy pinions, and fled far, far away; and
+had not (like some exquisite perfumes, the fine spirit of which is
+continually mingling with the air) left a fragrance behind, to mark where
+he had shook his wings. My husband's renewed caresses then became hateful
+to me; his brutality was tolerable, compared to his distasteful fondness.
+Still, compassion, and the fear of insulting his supposed feelings, by a
+want of sympathy, made me dissemble, and do violence to my delicacy. What
+a task!
+
+"Those who support a system of what I term false refinement, and will
+not allow great part of love in the female, as well as male breast, to
+spring in some respects involuntarily, may not admit that charms are as
+necessary to feed the passion, as virtues to convert the mellowing spirit
+into friendship. To such observers I have nothing to say, any more than
+to the moralists, who insist that women ought to, and can love their
+husbands, because it is their duty. To you, my child, I may add, with a
+heart tremblingly alive to your future conduct, some observations,
+dictated by my present feelings, on calmly reviewing this period of my
+life. When novelists or moralists praise as a virtue, a woman's coldness
+of constitution, and want of passion; and make her yield to the ardour of
+her lover out of sheer compassion, or to promote a frigid plan of future
+comfort, I am disgusted. They may be good women, in the ordinary
+acceptation of the phrase, and do no harm; but they appear to me not to
+have those 'finely fashioned nerves,' which render the senses exquisite.
+They may possess tenderness; but they want that fire of the imagination,
+which produces _active_ sensibility, and _positive_ virtue. How does the
+woman deserve to be characterized, who marries one man, with a heart and
+imagination devoted to another? Is she not an object of pity or contempt,
+when thus sacrilegiously violating the purity of her own feelings? Nay,
+it is as indelicate, when she is indifferent, unless she be
+constitutionally insensible; then indeed it is a mere affair of barter;
+and I have nothing to do with the secrets of trade. Yes; eagerly as I
+wish you to possess true rectitude of mind, and purity of affection, I
+must insist that a heartless conduct is the contrary of virtuous. Truth
+is the only basis of virtue; and we cannot, without depraving our minds,
+endeavour to please a lover or husband, but in proportion as he pleases
+us. Men, more effectually to enslave us, may inculcate this partial
+morality, and lose sight of virtue in subdividing it into the duties of
+particular stations; but let us not blush for nature without a cause!
+
+"After these remarks, I am ashamed to own, that I was pregnant. The
+greatest sacrifice of my principles in my whole life, was the allowing my
+husband again to be familiar with my person, though to this cruel act of
+self-denial, when I wished the earth to open and swallow me, you owe your
+birth; and I the unutterable pleasure of being a mother. There was
+something of delicacy in my husband's bridal attentions; but now his
+tainted breath, pimpled face, and blood-shot eyes, were not more
+repugnant to my senses, than his gross manners, and loveless familiarity
+to my taste.
+
+"A man would only be expected to maintain; yes, barely grant a
+subsistence, to a woman rendered odious by habitual intoxication; but who
+would expect him, or think it possible to love her? And unless 'youth,
+and genial years were flown,' it would be thought equally unreasonable to
+insist, [under penalty of] forfeiting almost every thing reckoned
+valuable in life, that he should not love another: whilst woman, weak in
+reason, impotent in will, is required to moralize, sentimentalize herself
+to stone, and pine her life away, labouring to reform her embruted mate.
+He may even spend in dissipation, and intemperance, the very intemperance
+which renders him so hateful, her property, and by stinting her expences,
+not permit her to beguile in society, a wearisome, joyless life; for over
+their mutual fortune she has no power, it must all pass through his hand.
+And if she be a mother, and in the present state of women, it is a great
+misfortune to be prevented from discharging the duties, and cultivating
+the affections of one, what has she not to endure?--But I have suffered
+the tenderness of one to lead me into reflections that I did not think of
+making, to interrupt my narrative--yet the full heart will overflow.
+
+"Mr. Venables' embarrassments did not now endear him to me; still,
+anxious to befriend him, I endeavoured to prevail on him to retrench his
+expences; but he had always some plausible excuse to give, to justify his
+not following my advice. Humanity, compassion, and the interest produced
+by a habit of living together, made me try to relieve, and sympathize
+with him; but, when I recollected that I was bound to live with such a
+being for ever--my heart died within me; my desire of improvement became
+languid, and baleful, corroding melancholy took possession of my soul.
+Marriage had bastilled me for life. I discovered in myself a capacity for
+the enjoyment of the various pleasures existence affords; yet, fettered
+by the partial laws of society, this fair globe was to me an universal
+blank.
+
+"When I exhorted my husband to economy, I referred to himself. I was
+obliged to practise the most rigid, or contract debts, which I had too
+much reason to fear would never be paid. I despised this paltry privilege
+of a wife, which can only be of use to the vicious or inconsiderate, and
+determined not to increase the torrent that was bearing him down. I was
+then ignorant of the extent of his fraudulent speculations, whom I was
+bound to honour and obey.
+
+"A woman neglected by her husband, or whose manners form a striking
+contrast with his, will always have men on the watch to soothe and
+flatter her. Besides, the forlorn state of a neglected woman, not
+destitute of personal charms, is particularly interesting, and rouses
+that species of pity, which is so near akin, it easily slides into love.
+A man of feeling thinks not of seducing, he is himself seduced by all the
+noblest emotions of his soul. He figures to himself all the sacrifices a
+woman of sensibility must make, and every situation in which his
+imagination places her, touches his heart, and fires his passions.
+Longing to take to his bosom the shorn lamb, and bid the drooping buds of
+hope revive, benevolence changes into passion: and should he then
+discover that he is beloved, honour binds him fast, though foreseeing
+that he may afterwards be obliged to pay severe damages to the man, who
+never appeared to value his wife's society, till he found that there was
+a chance of his being indemnified for the loss of it.
+
+"Such are the partial laws enacted by men; for, only to lay a stress on
+the dependent state of a woman in the grand question of the comforts
+arising from the possession of property, she is [even in this article]
+much more injured by the loss of the husband's affection, than he by that
+of his wife; yet where is she, condemned to the solitude of a deserted
+home, to look for a compensation from the woman, who seduces him from
+her? She cannot drive an unfaithful husband from his house, nor separate,
+or tear, his children from him, however culpable he may be; and he, still
+the master of his own fate, enjoys the smiles of a world, that would
+brand her with infamy, did she, seeking consolation, venture to
+retaliate.
+
+"These remarks are not dictated by experience; but merely by the
+compassion I feel for many amiable women, the _out-laws_ of the world.
+For myself, never encouraging any of the advances that were made to me,
+my lovers dropped off like the untimely shoots of spring. I did not even
+coquet with them; because I found, on examining myself, I could not
+coquet with a man without loving him a little; and I perceived that I
+should not be able to stop at the line of what are termed _innocent
+freedoms_, did I suffer any. My reserve was then the consequence of
+delicacy. Freedom of conduct has emancipated many women's minds; but my
+conduct has most rigidly been governed by my principles, till the
+improvement of my understanding has enabled me to discern the fallacy of
+prejudices at war with nature and reason.
+
+"Shortly after the change I have mentioned in my husband's conduct, my
+uncle was compelled by his declining health, to seek the succour of a
+milder climate, and embark for Lisbon. He left his will in the hands of a
+friend, an eminent solicitor; he had previously questioned me relative to
+my situation and state of mind, and declared very freely, that he could
+place no reliance on the stability of my husband's professions. He had
+been deceived in the unfolding of his character; he now thought it fixed
+in a train of actions that would inevitably lead to ruin and disgrace.
+
+"The evening before his departure, which we spent alone together, he
+folded me to his heart, uttering the endearing appellation of
+'child.'--My more than father! why was I not permitted to perform the
+last duties of one, and smooth the pillow of death? He seemed by his
+manner to be convinced that he should never see me more; yet requested
+me, most earnestly, to come to him, should I be obliged to leave my
+husband. He had before expressed his sorrow at hearing of my pregnancy,
+having determined to prevail on me to accompany him, till I informed him
+of that circumstance. He expressed himself unfeignedly sorry that any new
+tie should bind me to a man whom he thought so incapable of estimating my
+value; such was the kind language of affection.
+
+"I must repeat his own words; they made an indelible impression on my
+mind:
+
+"'The marriage state is certainly that in which women, generally
+speaking, can be most useful; but I am far from thinking that a woman,
+once married, ought to consider the engagement as indissoluble
+(especially if there be no children to reward her for sacrificing her
+feelings) in case her husband merits neither her love, nor esteem. Esteem
+will often supply the place of love; and prevent a woman from being
+wretched, though it may not make her happy. The magnitude of a sacrifice
+ought always to bear some proportion to the utility in view; and for a
+woman to live with a man, for whom she can cherish neither affection nor
+esteem, or even be of any use to him, excepting in the light of a
+house-keeper, is an abjectness of condition, the enduring of which no
+concurrence of circumstances can ever make a duty in the sight of God or
+just men. If indeed she submits to it merely to be maintained in
+idleness, she has no right to complain bitterly of her fate; or to act,
+as a person of independent character might, as if she had a title to
+disregard general rules.
+
+"'But the misfortune is, that many women only submit in appearance, and
+forfeit their own respect to secure their reputation in the world. The
+situation of a woman separated from her husband, is undoubtedly very
+different from that of a man who has left his wife. He, with lordly
+dignity, has shaken of a clog; and the allowing her food and raiment, is
+thought sufficient to secure his reputation from taint. And, should she
+have been inconsiderate, he will be celebrated for his generosity and
+forbearance. Such is the respect paid to the master-key of property! A
+woman, on the contrary, resigning what is termed her natural protector
+(though he never was so, but in name) is despised and shunned, for
+asserting the independence of mind distinctive of a rational being, and
+spurning at slavery.'
+
+"During the remainder of the evening, my uncle's tenderness led him
+frequently to revert to the subject, and utter, with increasing warmth,
+sentiments to the same purport. At length it was necessary to say
+'Farewell!'--and we parted--gracious God! to meet no more.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XI.
+
+
+"A GENTLEMAN of large fortune and of polished manners, had lately visited
+very frequently at our house, and treated me, if possible, with more
+respect than Mr. Venables paid him; my pregnancy was not yet visible, his
+society was a great relief to me, as I had for some time past, to avoid
+expence, confined myself very much at home. I ever disdained unnecessary,
+perhaps even prudent concealments; and my husband, with great ease,
+discovered the amount of my uncle's parting present. A copy of a writ was
+the stale pretext to extort it from me; and I had soon reason to believe
+that it was fabricated for the purpose. I acknowledge my folly in thus
+suffering myself to be continually imposed on. I had adhered to my
+resolution not to apply to my uncle, on the part of my husband, any more;
+yet, when I had received a sum sufficient to supply my own wants, and to
+enable me to pursue a plan I had in view, to settle my younger brother in
+a respectable employment, I allowed myself to be duped by Mr. Venables'
+shallow pretences, and hypocritical professions.
+
+"Thus did he pillage me and my family, thus frustrate all my plans of
+usefulness. Yet this was the man I was bound to respect and esteem: as if
+respect and esteem depended on an arbitrary will of our own! But a wife
+being as much a man's property as his horse, or his ass, she has nothing
+she can call her own. He may use any means to get at what the law
+considers as his, the moment his wife is in possession of it, even to the
+forcing of a lock, as Mr. Venables did, to search for notes in my
+writing-desk--and all this is done with a show of equity, because,
+forsooth, he is responsible for her maintenance.
+
+"The tender mother cannot _lawfully_ snatch from the gripe of the
+gambling spendthrift, or beastly drunkard, unmindful of his offspring,
+the fortune which falls to her by chance; or (so flagrant is the
+injustice) what she earns by her own exertions. No; he can rob her with
+impunity, even to waste publicly on a courtezan; and the laws of her
+country--if women have a country--afford her no protection or redress
+from the oppressor, unless she have the plea of bodily fear; yet how
+many ways are there of goading the soul almost to madness, equally
+unmanly, though not so mean? When such laws were framed, should not
+impartial lawgivers have first decreed, in the style of a great assembly,
+who recognized the existence of an _etre supreme_, to fix the national
+belief, that the husband should always be wiser and more virtuous than
+his wife, in order to entitle him, with a show of justice, to keep this
+idiot, or perpetual minor, for ever in bondage. But I must have done--on
+this subject, my indignation continually runs away with me.
+
+"The company of the gentleman I have already mentioned, who had a general
+acquaintance with literature and subjects of taste, was grateful to me;
+my countenance brightened up as he approached, and I unaffectedly
+expressed the pleasure I felt. The amusement his conversation afforded
+me, made it easy to comply with my husband's request, to endeavour to
+render our house agreeable to him.
+
+"His attentions became more pointed; but, as I was not of the number of
+women, whose virtue, as it is termed, immediately takes alarm, I
+endeavoured, rather by raillery than serious expostulation, to give a
+different turn to his conversation. He assumed a new mode of attack, and
+I was, for a while, the dupe of his pretended friendship.
+
+"I had, merely in the style of _badinage_, boasted of my conquest, and
+repeated his lover-like compliments to my husband. But he begged me, for
+God's sake, not to affront his friend, or I should destroy all his
+projects, and be his ruin. Had I had more affection for my husband, I
+should have expressed my contempt of this time-serving politeness: now I
+imagined that I only felt pity; yet it would have puzzled a casuist to
+point out in what the exact difference consisted.
+
+"This friend began now, in confidence, to discover to me the real state
+of my husband's affairs. 'Necessity,' said Mr. S----; why should I reveal
+his name? for he affected to palliate the conduct he could not excuse,
+'had led him to take such steps, by accommodation bills, buying goods on
+credit, to sell them for ready money, and similar transactions, that his
+character in the commercial world was gone. He was considered,' he added,
+lowering his voice, 'on 'Change as a swindler.'
+
+"I felt at that moment the first maternal pang. Aware of the evils my sex
+have to struggle with, I still wished, for my own consolation, to be the
+mother of a daughter; and I could not bear to think, that the _sins_ of
+her father's entailed disgrace, should be added to the ills to which
+woman is heir.
+
+"So completely was I deceived by these shows of friendship (nay, I
+believe, according to his interpretation, Mr. S--really was my friend)
+that I began to consult him respecting the best mode of retrieving my
+husband's character: it is the good name of a woman only that sets to
+rise no more. I knew not that he had been drawn into a whirlpool, out of
+which he had not the energy to attempt to escape. He seemed indeed
+destitute of the power of employing his faculties in any regular
+pursuit. His principles of action were so loose, and his mind so
+uncultivated, that every thing like order appeared to him in the shape of
+restraint; and, like men in the savage state, he required the strong
+stimulus of hope or fear, produced by wild speculations, in which the
+interests of others went for nothing, to keep his spirits awake. He one
+time possessed patriotism, but he knew not what it was to feel honest
+indignation; and pretended to be an advocate for liberty, when, with as
+little affection for the human race as for individuals, he thought of
+nothing but his own gratification. He was just such a citizen, as a
+father. The sums he adroitly obtained by a violation of the laws of his
+country, as well as those of humanity, he would allow a mistress to
+squander; though she was, with the same _sang froid_, consigned, as were
+his children, to poverty, when another proved more attractive.
+
+"On various pretences, his friend continued to visit me; and, observing
+my want of money, he tried to induce me to accept of pecuniary aid; but
+this offer I absolutely rejected, though it was made with such delicacy,
+I could not be displeased.
+
+"One day he came, as I thought accidentally, to dinner. My husband was
+very much engaged in business, and quitted the room soon after the cloth
+was removed. We conversed as usual, till confidential advice led again to
+love. I was extremely mortified. I had a sincere regard for him, and
+hoped that he had an equal friendship for me. I therefore began mildly to
+expostulate with him. This gentleness he mistook for coy encouragement;
+and he would not be diverted from the subject. Perceiving his mistake, I
+seriously asked him how, using such language to me, he could profess to
+be my husband's friend? A significant sneer excited my curiosity, and he,
+supposing this to be my only scruple, took a letter deliberately out of
+his pocket, saying, 'Your husband's honour is not inflexible. How could
+you, with your discernment, think it so? Why, he left the room this very
+day on purpose to give me an opportunity to explain myself; _he_ thought
+me too timid--too tardy.'
+
+"I snatched the letter with indescribable emotion. The purport of it was
+to invite him to dinner, and to ridicule his chivalrous respect for me.
+He assured him, 'that every woman had her price, and, with gross
+indecency, hinted, that he should be glad to have the duty of a husband
+taken off his hands. These he termed _liberal sentiments_. He advised him
+not to shock my romantic notions, but to attack my credulous generosity,
+and weak pity; and concluded with requesting him to lend him five hundred
+pounds for a month or six weeks.' I read this letter twice over; and the
+firm purpose it inspired, calmed the rising tumult of my soul. I rose
+deliberately, requested Mr. S---- to wait a moment, and instantly going
+into the counting-house, desired Mr. Venables to return with me to the
+dining-parlour.
+
+"He laid down his pen, and entered with me, without observing any change
+in my countenance. I shut the door, and, giving him the letter, simply
+asked, 'whether he wrote it, or was it a forgery?'
+
+"Nothing could equal his confusion. His friend's eye met his, and he
+muttered something about a joke--But I interrupted him--'It is
+sufficient--We part for ever.'
+
+"I continued, with solemnity, 'I have borne with your tyranny and
+infidelities. I disdain to utter what I have borne with. I thought you
+unprincipled, but not so decidedly vicious. I formed a tie, in the sight
+of heaven--I have held it sacred; even when men, more conformable to my
+taste, have made me feel--I despise all subterfuge!--that I was not dead
+to love. Neglected by you, I have resolutely stifled the enticing
+emotions, and respected the plighted faith you outraged. And you dare now
+to insult me, by selling me to prostitution!--Yes--equally lost to
+delicacy and principle--you dared sacrilegiously to barter the honour of
+the mother of your child.'
+
+"Then, turning to Mr. S----, I added, 'I call on you, Sir, to witness,'
+and I lifted my hands and eyes to heaven, 'that, as solemnly as I took
+his name, I now abjure it,' I pulled off my ring, and put it on the
+table; 'and that I mean immediately to quit his house, never to enter it
+more. I will provide for myself and child. I leave him as free as I am
+determined to be myself--he shall be answerable for no debts of mine.'
+
+"Astonishment closed their lips, till Mr. Venables, gently pushing his
+friend, with a forced smile, out of the room, nature for a moment
+prevailed, and, appearing like himself, he turned round, burning with
+rage, to me: but there was no terror in the frown, excepting when
+contrasted with the malignant smile which preceded it. He bade me 'leave
+the house at my peril; told me he despised my threats; I had no resource;
+I could not swear the peace against him!--I was not afraid of my
+life!--he had never struck me!'
+
+"He threw the letter in the fire, which I had incautiously left in his
+hands; and, quitting the room, locked the door on me.
+
+"When left alone, I was a moment or two before I could recollect myself.
+One scene had succeeded another with such rapidity, I almost doubted
+whether I was reflecting on a real event. 'Was it possible? Was I,
+indeed, free?'--Yes; free I termed myself, when I decidedly perceived
+the conduct I ought to adopt. How had I panted for liberty--liberty, that
+I would have purchased at any price, but that of my own esteem! I rose,
+and shook myself; opened the window, and methought the air never smelled
+so sweet. The face of heaven grew fairer as I viewed it, and the clouds
+seemed to flit away obedient to my wishes, to give my soul room to
+expand. I was all soul, and (wild as it may appear) felt as if I could
+have dissolved in the soft balmy gale that kissed my cheek, or have
+glided below the horizon on the glowing, descending beams. A seraphic
+satisfaction animated, without agitating my spirits; and my imagination
+collected, in visions sublimely terrible, or soothingly beautiful, an
+immense variety of the endless images, which nature affords, and fancy
+combines, of the grand and fair. The lustre of these bright picturesque
+sketches faded with the setting sun; but I was still alive to the calm
+delight they had diffused through my heart.
+
+"There may be advocates for matrimonial obedience, who, making a
+distinction between the duty of a wife and of a human being, may blame my
+conduct.--To them I write not--my feelings are not for them to analyze;
+and may you, my child, never be able to ascertain, by heart-rending
+experience, what your mother felt before the present emancipation of her
+mind!
+
+"I began to write a letter to my father, after closing one to my uncle;
+not to ask advice, but to signify my determination; when I was
+interrupted by the entrance of Mr. Venables. His manner was changed. His
+views on my uncle's fortune made him averse to my quitting his house, or
+he would, I am convinced, have been glad to have shaken off even the
+slight restraint my presence imposed on him; the restraint of showing me
+some respect. So far from having an affection for me, he really hated me,
+because he was convinced that I must despise him.
+
+"He told me, that, 'As I now had had time to cool and reflect, he did not
+doubt but that my prudence, and nice sense of propriety, would lead me to
+overlook what was passed.'
+
+"'Reflection,' I replied, 'had only confirmed my purpose, and no power on
+earth could divert me from it.'
+
+"Endeavouring to assume a soothing voice and look, when he would
+willingly have tortured me, to force me to feel his power, his
+countenance had an infernal expression, when he desired me, 'Not to
+expose myself to the servants, by obliging him to confine me in my
+apartment; if then I would give my promise not to quit the house
+precipitately, I should be free--and--.' I declared, interrupting him,
+'that I would promise nothing. I had no measures to keep with him--I was
+resolved, and would not condescend to subterfuge.'
+
+"He muttered, 'that I should soon repent of these preposterous airs;'
+and, ordering tea to be carried into my little study, which had a
+communication with my bed-chamber, he once more locked the door upon me,
+and left me to my own meditations. I had passively followed him up
+stairs, not wishing to fatigue myself with unavailing exertion.
+
+"Nothing calms the mind like a fixed purpose. I felt as if I had heaved
+a thousand weight from my heart; the atmosphere seemed lightened; and, if
+I execrated the institutions of society, which thus enable men to
+tyrannize over women, it was almost a disinterested sentiment. I
+disregarded present inconveniences, when my mind had done struggling with
+itself,--when reason and inclination had shaken hands and were at peace.
+I had no longer the cruel task before me, in endless perspective, aye,
+during the tedious for ever of life, of labouring to overcome my
+repugnance--of labouring to extinguish the hopes, the maybes of a lively
+imagination. Death I had hailed as my only chance for deliverance; but,
+while existence had still so many charms, and life promised happiness, I
+shrunk from the icy arms of an unknown tyrant, though far more inviting
+than those of the man, to whom I supposed myself bound without any other
+alternative; and was content to linger a little longer, waiting for I
+knew not what, rather than leave 'the warm precincts of the cheerful
+day,' and all the unenjoyed affection of my nature.
+
+"My present situation gave a new turn to my reflection; and I wondered
+(now the film seemed to be withdrawn, that obscured the piercing sight of
+reason) how I could, previously to the deciding outrage, have considered
+myself as everlastingly united to vice and folly? 'Had an evil genius
+cast a spell at my birth; or a demon stalked out of chaos, to perplex my
+understanding, and enchain my will, with delusive prejudices?'
+
+"I pursued this train of thinking; it led me out of myself, to expatiate
+on the misery peculiar to my sex. 'Are not,' I thought, 'the despots for
+ever stigmatized, who, in the wantonness of power, commanded even the
+most atrocious criminals to be chained to dead bodies? though surely
+those laws are much more inhuman, which forge adamantine fetters to bind
+minds together, that never can mingle in social communion! What indeed
+can equal the wretchedness of that state, in which there is no
+alternative, but to extinguish the affections, or encounter infamy?'
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XII.
+
+
+"TOWARDS midnight Mr. Venables entered my chamber; and, with calm
+audacity preparing to go to bed, he bade me make haste, 'for that was the
+best place for husbands and wives to end their differences. He had been
+drinking plentifully to aid his courage.
+
+"I did not at first deign to reply. But perceiving that he affected to
+take my silence for consent, I told him that, 'If he would not go to
+another bed, or allow me, I should sit up in my study all night.' He
+attempted to pull me into the chamber, half joking. But I resisted; and,
+as he had determined not to give me any reason for saying that he used
+violence, after a few more efforts, he retired, cursing my obstinacy, to
+bed.
+
+"I sat musing some time longer; then, throwing my cloak around me,
+prepared for sleep on a sopha. And, so fortunate seemed my deliverance,
+so sacred the pleasure of being thus wrapped up in myself, that I slept
+profoundly, and woke with a mind composed to encounter the struggles of
+the day. Mr. Venables did not wake till some hours after; and then he
+came to me half-dressed, yawning and stretching, with haggard eyes, as if
+he scarcely recollected what had passed the preceding evening. He fixed
+his eyes on me for a moment, then, calling me a fool, asked 'How long I
+intended to continue this pretty farce? For his part, he was devilish
+sick of it; but this was the plague of marrying women who pretended to
+know something.'
+
+"I made no other reply to this harangue, than to say, 'That he ought to
+be glad to get rid of a woman so unfit to be his companion--and that any
+change in my conduct would be mean dissimulation; for maturer reflection
+only gave the sacred seal of reason to my first resolution.'
+
+"He looked as if he could have stamped with impatience, at being obliged
+to stifle his rage; but, conquering his anger (for weak people, whose
+passions seem the most ungovernable, restrain them with the greatest
+ease, when they have a sufficient motive), he exclaimed, 'Very pretty,
+upon my soul! very pretty, theatrical flourishes! Pray, fair Roxana,
+stoop from your altitudes, and remember that you are acting a part in
+real life.'
+
+"He uttered this speech with a self-satisfied air, and went down stairs
+to dress.
+
+"In about an hour he came to me again; and in the same tone said, 'That
+he came as my gentleman-usher to hand me down to breakfast.
+
+"'Of the black rod?' asked I.
+
+"This question, and the tone in which I asked it, a little disconcerted
+him. To say the truth, I now felt no resentment; my firm resolution to
+free myself from my ignoble thraldom, had absorbed the various emotions
+which, during six years, had racked my soul. The duty pointed out by my
+principles seemed clear; and not one tender feeling intruded to make me
+swerve: The dislike which my husband had inspired was strong; but it only
+led me to wish to avoid, to wish to let him drop out of my memory; there
+was no misery, no torture that I would not deliberately have chosen,
+rather than renew my lease of servitude.
+
+"During the breakfast, he attempted to reason with me on the folly of
+romantic sentiments; for this was the indiscriminate epithet he gave to
+every mode of conduct or thinking superior to his own. He asserted, 'that
+all the world were governed by their own interest; those who pretended to
+be actuated by different motives, were only deeper knaves, or fools
+crazed by books, who took for gospel all the rodomantade nonsense written
+by men who knew nothing of the world. For his part, he thanked God, he
+was no hypocrite; and, if he stretched a point sometimes, it was always
+with an intention of paying every man his own.'
+
+"He then artfully insinuated, 'that he daily expected a vessel to
+arrive, a successful speculation, that would make him easy for the
+present, and that he had several other schemes actually depending, that
+could not fail. He had no doubt of becoming rich in a few years, though
+he had been thrown back by some unlucky adventures at the setting out.'
+
+"I mildly replied, 'That I wished he might not involve himself still
+deeper.'
+
+"He had no notion that I was governed by a decision of judgment, not to
+be compared with a mere spurt of resentment. He knew not what it was to
+feel indignation against vice, and often boasted of his placable temper,
+and readiness to forgive injuries. True; for he only considered the being
+deceived, as an effort of skill he had not guarded against; and then,
+with a cant of candour, would observe, 'that he did not know how he
+might himself have been tempted to act in the same circumstances.' And,
+as his heart never opened to friendship, it never was wounded by
+disappointment. Every new acquaintance he protested, it is true, was 'the
+cleverest fellow in the world;' and he really thought so; till the
+novelty of his conversation or manners ceased to have any effect on his
+sluggish spirits. His respect for rank or fortune was more permanent,
+though he chanced to have no design of availing himself of the influence
+of either to promote his own views.
+
+"After a prefatory conversation,--my blood (I thought it had been cooler)
+flushed over my whole countenance as he spoke--he alluded to my
+situation. He desired me to reflect--'and act like a prudent woman, as
+the best proof of my superior understanding; for he must own I had sense,
+did I know how to use it. I was not,' he laid a stress on his words,
+'without my passions; and a husband was a convenient cloke.--He was
+liberal in his way of thinking; and why might not we, like many other
+married people, who were above vulgar prejudices, tacitly consent to let
+each other follow their own inclination?--He meant nothing more, in the
+letter I made the ground of complaint; and the pleasure which I seemed to
+take in Mr. S.'s company, led him to conclude, that he was not
+disagreeable to me.'
+
+"A clerk brought in the letters of the day, and I, as I often did, while
+he was discussing subjects of business, went to the _piano forte_, and
+began to play a favourite air to restore myself, as it were, to nature,
+and drive the sophisticated sentiments I had just been obliged to listen
+to, out of my soul.
+
+"They had excited sensations similar to those I have felt, in viewing the
+squalid inhabitants of some of the lanes and back streets of the
+metropolis, mortified at being compelled to consider them as my
+fellow-creatures, as if an ape had claimed kindred with me. Or, as when
+surrounded by a mephitical fog, I have wished to have a volley of cannon
+fired, to clear the incumbered atmosphere, and give me room to breathe
+and move.
+
+"My spirits were all in arms, and I played a kind of extemporary prelude.
+The cadence was probably wild and impassioned, while, lost in thought, I
+made the sounds a kind of echo to my train of thinking.
+
+"Pausing for a moment, I met Mr. Venables' eyes. He was observing me with
+an air of conceited satisfaction, as much as to say--'My last insinuation
+has done the business--she begins to know her own interest.' Then
+gathering up his letters, he said, 'That he hoped he should hear no more
+romantic stuff, well enough in a miss just come from boarding school;'
+and went, as was his custom, to the counting-house. I still continued
+playing; and, turning to a sprightly lesson, I executed it with uncommon
+vivacity. I heard footsteps approach the door, and was soon convinced
+that Mr. Venables was listening; the consciousness only gave more
+animation to my fingers. He went down into the kitchen, and the cook,
+probably by his desire, came to me, to know what I would please to order
+for dinner. Mr. Venables came into the parlour again, with apparent
+carelessness. I perceived that the cunning man was over-reaching himself;
+and I gave my directions as usual, and left the room.
+
+"While I was making some alteration in my dress, Mr. Venables peeped in,
+and, begging my pardon for interrupting me, disappeared. I took up some
+work (I could not read), and two or three messages were sent to me,
+probably for no other purpose, but to enable Mr. Venables to ascertain
+what I was about.
+
+"I listened whenever I heard the street-door open; at last I imagined I
+could distinguish Mr. Venables' step, going out. I laid aside my work;
+my heart palpitated; still I was afraid hastily to enquire; and I waited
+a long half hour, before I ventured to ask the boy whether his master was
+in the counting-house?
+
+"Being answered in the negative, I bade him call me a coach, and
+collecting a few necessaries hastily together, with a little parcel of
+letters and papers which I had collected the preceding evening, I hurried
+into it, desiring the coachman to drive to a distant part of the town.
+
+"I almost feared that the coach would break down before I got out of the
+street; and, when I turned the corner, I seemed to breathe a freer air. I
+was ready to imagine that I was rising above the thick atmosphere of
+earth; or I felt, as wearied souls might be supposed to feel on entering
+another state of existence.
+
+"I stopped at one or two stands of coaches to elude pursuit, and then
+drove round the skirts of the town to seek for an obscure lodging, where
+I wished to remain concealed, till I could avail myself of my uncle's
+protection. I had resolved to assume my own name immediately, and openly
+to avow my determination, without any formal vindication, the moment I
+had found a home, in which I could rest free from the daily alarm of
+expecting to see Mr. Venables enter.
+
+"I looked at several lodgings; but finding that I could not, without a
+reference to some acquaintance, who might inform my tyrant, get
+admittance into a decent apartment--men have not all this trouble--I
+thought of a woman whom I had assisted to furnish a little haberdasher's
+shop, and who I knew had a first floor to let.
+
+"I went to her, and though I could not persuade her, that the quarrel
+between me and Mr. Venables would never be made up, still she agreed to
+conceal me for the present; yet assuring me at the same time, shaking her
+head, that, when a woman was once married, she must bear every thing. Her
+pale face, on which appeared a thousand haggard lines and delving
+wrinkles, produced by what is emphatically termed fretting, inforced her
+remark; and I had afterwards an opportunity of observing the treatment
+she had to endure, which grizzled her into patience. She toiled from
+morning till night; yet her husband would rob the till, and take away the
+money reserved for paying bills; and, returning home drunk, he would
+beat her if she chanced to offend him, though she had a child at the
+breast.
+
+"These scenes awoke me at night; and, in the morning, I heard her, as
+usual, talk to her dear Johnny--he, forsooth, was her master; no slave in
+the West Indies had one more despotic; but fortunately she was of the
+true Russian breed of wives.
+
+"My mind, during the few past days, seemed, as it were, disengaged from
+my body; but, now the struggle was over, I felt very forcibly the effect
+which perturbation of spirits produces on a woman in my situation.
+
+"The apprehension of a miscarriage, obliged me to confine myself to my
+apartment near a fortnight; but I wrote to my uncle's friend for money,
+promising 'to call on him, and explain my situation, when I was well
+enough to go out; mean time I earnestly intreated him, not to mention my
+place of abode to any one, lest my husband--such the law considered
+him--should disturb the mind he could not conquer. I mentioned my
+intention of setting out for Lisbon, to claim my uncle's protection, the
+moment my health would permit.'
+
+"The tranquillity however, which I was recovering, was soon interrupted.
+My landlady came up to me one day, with eyes swollen with weeping, unable
+to utter what she was commanded to say. She declared, 'That she was never
+so miserable in her life; that she must appear an ungrateful monster; and
+that she would readily go down on her knees to me, to intreat me to
+forgive her, as she had done to her husband to spare her the cruel task.'
+Sobs prevented her from proceeding, or answering my impatient enquiries,
+to know what she meant.
+
+"When she became a little more composed, she took a newspaper out of her
+pocket, declaring, 'that her heart smote her, but what could she do?--she
+must obey her husband.' I snatched the paper from her. An advertisement
+quickly met my eye, purporting, that 'Maria Venables had, without any
+assignable cause, absconded from her husband; and any person harbouring
+her, was menaced with the utmost severity of the law.'
+
+"Perfectly acquainted with Mr. Venables' meanness of soul, this step did
+not excite my surprise, and scarcely my contempt. Resentment in my
+breast, never survived love. I bade the poor woman, in a kind tone, wipe
+her eyes, and request her husband to come up, and speak to me himself.
+
+"My manner awed him. He respected a lady, though not a woman; and began
+to mutter out an apology.
+
+"'Mr. Venables was a rich gentleman; he wished to oblige me, but he had
+suffered enough by the law already, to tremble at the thought; besides,
+for certain, we should come together again, and then even I should not
+thank him for being accessary to keeping us asunder.--A husband and wife
+were, God knows, just as one,--and all would come round at last.' He
+uttered a drawling 'Hem!' and then with an arch look, added--'Master
+might have had his little frolics--but--Lord bless your heart!--men
+would be men while the world stands.'
+
+"To argue with this privileged first-born of reason, I perceived, would
+be vain. I therefore only requested him to let me remain another day at
+his house, while I sought for a lodging; and not to inform Mr. Venables
+that I had ever been sheltered there.
+
+"He consented, because he had not the courage to refuse a person for whom
+he had an habitual respect; but I heard the pent-up choler burst forth in
+curses, when he met his wife, who was waiting impatiently at the foot of
+the stairs, to know what effect my expostulations would have on him.
+
+"Without wasting any time in the fruitless indulgence of vexation, I once
+more set out in search of an abode in which I could hide myself for a
+few weeks.
+
+"Agreeing to pay an exorbitant price, I hired an apartment, without any
+reference being required relative to my character: indeed, a glance at my
+shape seemed to say, that my motive for concealment was sufficiently
+obvious. Thus was I obliged to shroud my head in infamy.
+
+"To avoid all danger of detection--I use the appropriate word, my child,
+for I was hunted out like a felon--I determined to take possession of my
+new lodgings that very evening.
+
+"I did not inform my landlady where I was going. I knew that she had a
+sincere affection for me, and would willingly have run any risk to show
+her gratitude; yet I was fully convinced, that a few kind words from
+Johnny would have found the woman in her, and her dear benefactress, as
+she termed me in an agony of tears, would have been sacrificed, to
+recompense her tyrant for condescending to treat her like an equal. He
+could be kind-hearted, as she expressed it, when he pleased. And this
+thawed sternness, contrasted with his habitual brutality, was the more
+acceptable, and could not be purchased at too dear a rate.
+
+"The sight of the advertisement made me desirous of taking refuge with my
+uncle, let what would be the consequence; and I repaired in a hackney
+coach (afraid of meeting some person who might chance to know me, had I
+walked) to the chambers of my uncle's friend.
+
+"He received me with great politeness (my uncle had already prepossessed
+him in my favour), and listened, with interest, to my explanation of the
+motives which had induced me to fly from home, and skulk in obscurity,
+with all the timidity of fear that ought only to be the companion of
+guilt. He lamented, with rather more gallantry than, in my situation, I
+thought delicate, that such a woman should be thrown away on a man
+insensible to the charms of beauty or grace. He seemed at a loss what to
+advise me to do, to evade my husband's search, without hastening to my
+uncle, whom, he hesitating said, I might not find alive. He uttered this
+intelligence with visible regret; requested me, at least, to wait for the
+arrival of the next packet; offered me what money I wanted, and promised
+to visit me.
+
+"He kept his word; still no letter arrived to put an end to my painful
+state of suspense. I procured some books and music, to beguile the
+tedious solitary days.
+
+    'Come, ever smiling Liberty,
+    'And with thee bring thy jocund train:'
+
+I sung--and sung till, saddened by the strain of joy, I bitterly lamented
+the fate that deprived me of all social pleasure. Comparative liberty
+indeed I had possessed myself of; but the jocund train lagged far
+behind!
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XIII.
+
+
+"BY watching my only visitor, my uncle's friend, or by some other means,
+Mr. Venables discovered my residence, and came to enquire for me. The
+maid-servant assured him there was no such person in the house. A bustle
+ensued--I caught the alarm--listened--distinguished his voice, and
+immediately locked the door. They suddenly grew still; and I waited near
+a quarter of an hour, before I heard him open the parlour door, and mount
+the stairs with the mistress of the house, who obsequiously declared that
+she knew nothing of me.
+
+"Finding my door locked, she requested me to 'open it, and prepare to go
+home with my husband, poor gentleman! to whom I had already occasioned
+sufficient vexation.' I made no reply. Mr. Venables then, in an assumed
+tone of softness, intreated me, 'to consider what he suffered, and my own
+reputation, and get the better of childish resentment.' He ran on in the
+same strain, pretending to address me, but evidently adapting his
+discourse to the capacity of the landlady; who, at every pause, uttered
+an exclamation of pity; or 'Yes, to be sure--Very true, sir.'
+
+"Sick of the farce, and perceiving that I could not avoid the hated
+interview, I opened the door, and he entered. Advancing with easy
+assurance to take my hand, I shrunk from his touch, with an involuntary
+start, as I should have done from a noisome reptile, with more disgust
+than terror. His conductress was retiring, to give us, as she said, an
+opportunity to accommodate matters. But I bade her come in, or I would go
+out; and curiosity impelled her to obey me.
+
+"Mr. Venables began to expostulate; and this woman, proud of his
+confidence, to second him. But I calmly silenced her, in the midst of a
+vulgar harangue, and turning to him, asked, 'Why he vainly tormented me?
+declaring that no power on earth should force me back to his house.'
+
+"After a long altercation, the particulars of which, it would be to no
+purpose to repeat, he left the room. Some time was spent in loud
+conversation in the parlour below, and I discovered that he had brought
+his friend, an attorney, with him.
+
+                    *   *   *   *   *   *   *
+*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *
+*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *
+*   *
+
+The tumult on the landing place, brought out a gentleman, who had
+recently taken apartments in the house; he enquired why I was thus
+assailed[91-A]? The voluble attorney instantly repeated the trite tale.
+The stranger turned to me, observing, with the most soothing politeness
+and manly interest, that 'my countenance told a very different story.' He
+added, 'that I should not be insulted, or forced out of the house, by any
+body.'
+
+"'Not by her husband?' asked the attorney.
+
+"'No, sir, not by her husband.' Mr. Venables advanced towards him--But
+there was a decision in his attitude, that so well seconded that of his
+voice,
+
+*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *
+*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *
+*  *  *  *
+
+They left the house: at the same time protesting, that any one that
+should dare to protect me, should be prosecuted with the utmost rigour.
+
+"They were scarcely out of the house, when my landlady came up to me
+again, and begged my pardon, in a very different tone. For, though Mr.
+Venables had bid her, at her peril, harbour me, he had not attended, I
+found, to her broad hints, to discharge the lodging. I instantly promised
+to pay her, and make her a present to compensate for my abrupt departure,
+if she would procure me another lodging, at a sufficient distance; and
+she, in return, repeating Mr. Venables' plausible tale, I raised her
+indignation, and excited her sympathy, by telling her briefly the truth.
+
+"She expressed her commiseration with such honest warmth, that I felt
+soothed; for I have none of that fastidious sensitiveness, which a vulgar
+accent or gesture can alarm to the disregard of real kindness. I was ever
+glad to perceive in others the humane feelings I delighted to exercise;
+and the recollection of some ridiculous characteristic circumstances,
+which have occurred in a moment of emotion, has convulsed me with
+laughter, though at the instant I should have thought it sacrilegious to
+have smiled. Your improvement, my dearest girl, being ever present to me
+while I write, I note these feelings, because women, more accustomed to
+observe manners than actions, are too much alive to ridicule. So much so,
+that their boasted sensibility is often stifled by false delicacy. True
+sensibility, the sensibility which is the auxiliary of virtue, and the
+soul of genius, is in society so occupied with the feelings of others, as
+scarcely to regard its own sensations. With what reverence have I looked
+up at my uncle, the dear parent of my mind! when I have seen the sense of
+his own sufferings, of mind and body, absorbed in a desire to comfort
+those, whose misfortunes were comparatively trivial. He would have been
+ashamed of being as indulgent to himself, as he was to others. 'Genuine
+fortitude,' he would assert, 'consisted in governing our own emotions,
+and making allowance for the weaknesses in our friends, that we would not
+tolerate in ourselves.' But where is my fond regret leading me!
+
+"'Women must be submissive,' said my landlady. 'Indeed what could most
+women do? Who had they to maintain them, but their husbands? Every woman,
+and especially a lady, could not go through rough and smooth, as she had
+done, to earn a little bread.'
+
+"She was in a talking mood, and proceeded to inform me how she had been
+used in the world. 'She knew what it was to have a bad husband, or she
+did not know who should.' I perceived that she would be very much
+mortified, were I not to attend to her tale, and I did not attempt to
+interrupt her, though I wished her, as soon as possible, to go out in
+search of a new abode for me, where I could once more hide my head.
+
+"She began by telling me, 'That she had saved a little money in service;
+and was over-persuaded (we must all be in love once in our lives) to
+marry a likely man, a footman in the family, not worth a groat. My plan,'
+she continued, 'was to take a house, and let out lodgings; and all went
+on well, till my husband got acquainted with an impudent slut, who chose
+to live on other people's means--and then all went to rack and ruin. He
+ran in debt to buy her fine clothes, such clothes as I never thought of
+wearing myself, and--would you believe it?--he signed an execution on my
+very goods, bought with the money I worked so hard to get; and they came
+and took my bed from under me, before I heard a word of the matter. Aye,
+madam, these are misfortunes that you gentlefolks know nothing of,--but
+sorrow is sorrow, let it come which way it will.
+
+"'I sought for a service again--very hard, after having a house of my
+own!--but he used to follow me, and kick up such a riot when he was
+drunk, that I could not keep a place; nay, he even stole my clothes, and
+pawned them; and when I went to the pawnbroker's, and offered to take my
+oath that they were not bought with a farthing of his money, they said,
+'It was all as one, my husband had a right to whatever I had.'
+
+"'At last he listed for a soldier, and I took a house, making an
+agreement to pay for the furniture by degrees; and I almost starved
+myself, till I once more got before-hand in the world.
+
+"'After an absence of six years (God forgive me! I thought he was dead)
+my husband returned; found me out, and came with such a penitent face, I
+forgave him, and clothed him from head to foot. But he had not been a
+week in the house, before some of his creditors arrested him; and, he
+selling my goods, I found myself once more reduced to beggary; for I was
+not as well able to work, go to bed late, and rise early, as when I
+quitted service; and then I thought it hard enough. He was soon tired of
+me, when there was nothing more to be had, and left me again.
+
+"'I will not tell you how I was buffeted about, till, hearing for certain
+that he had died in an hospital abroad, I once more returned to my old
+occupation; but have not yet been able to get my head above water: so,
+madam, you must not be angry if I am afraid to run any risk, when I know
+so well, that women have always the worst of it, when law is to decide.'
+
+"After uttering a few more complaints, I prevailed on my landlady to go
+out in quest of a lodging; and, to be more secure, I condescended to the
+mean shift of changing my name.
+
+"But why should I dwell on similar incidents!--I was hunted, like an
+infected beast, from three different apartments, and should not have been
+allowed to rest in any, had not Mr. Venables, informed of my uncle's
+dangerous state of health, been inspired with the fear of hurrying me out
+of the world as I advanced in my pregnancy, by thus tormenting and
+obliging me to take sudden journeys to avoid him; and then his
+speculations on my uncle's fortune must prove abortive.
+
+"One day, when he had pursued me to an inn, I fainted, hurrying from him;
+and, falling down, the sight of my blood alarmed him, and obtained a
+respite for me. It is strange that he should have retained any hope,
+after observing my unwavering determination; but, from the mildness of my
+behaviour, when I found all my endeavours to change his disposition
+unavailing, he formed an erroneous opinion of my character, imagining
+that, were we once more together, I should part with the money he could
+not legally force from me, with the same facility as formerly. My
+forbearance and occasional sympathy he had mistaken for weakness of
+character; and, because he perceived that I disliked resistance, he
+thought my indulgence and compassion mere selfishness, and never
+discovered that the fear of being unjust, or of unnecessarily wounding
+the feelings of another, was much more painful to me, than any thing I
+could have to endure myself. Perhaps it was pride which made me imagine,
+that I could bear what I dreaded to inflict; and that it was often easier
+to suffer, than to see the sufferings of others.
+
+"I forgot to mention that, during this persecution, I received a letter
+from my uncle, informing me, 'that he only found relief from continual
+change of air; and that he intended to return when the spring was a
+little more advanced (it was now the middle of February), and then we
+would plan a journey to Italy, leaving the fogs and cares of England far
+behind.' He approved of my conduct, promised to adopt my child, and
+seemed to have no doubt of obliging Mr. Venables to hear reason. He wrote
+to his friend, by the same post, desiring him to call on Mr. Venables in
+his name; and, in consequence of the remonstrances he dictated, I was
+permitted to lie-in tranquilly.
+
+"The two or three weeks previous, I had been allowed to rest in peace;
+but, so accustomed was I to pursuit and alarm, that I seldom closed my
+eyes without being haunted by Mr. Venables' image, who seemed to assume
+terrific or hateful forms to torment me, wherever I turned.--Sometimes a
+wild cat, a roaring bull, or hideous assassin, whom I vainly attempted to
+fly; at others he was a demon, hurrying me to the brink of a precipice,
+plunging me into dark waves, or horrid gulfs; and I woke, in violent fits
+of trembling anxiety, to assure myself that it was all a dream, and to
+endeavour to lure my waking thoughts to wander to the delightful Italian
+vales, I hoped soon to visit; or to picture some august ruins, where I
+reclined in fancy on a mouldering column, and escaped, in the
+contemplation of the heart-enlarging virtues of antiquity, from the
+turmoil of cares that had depressed all the daring purposes of my soul.
+But I was not long allowed to calm my mind by the exercise of my
+imagination; for the third day after your birth, my child, I was
+surprised by a visit from my elder brother; who came in the most abrupt
+manner, to inform me of the death of my uncle. He had left the greater
+part of his fortune to my child, appointing me its guardian; in short,
+every step was taken to enable me to be mistress of his fortune, without
+putting any part of it in Mr. Venables' power. My brother came to vent
+his rage on me, for having, as he expressed himself, 'deprived him, my
+uncle's eldest nephew, of his inheritance;' though my uncle's property,
+the fruit of his own exertion, being all in the funds, or on landed
+securities, there was not a shadow of justice in the charge.
+
+"As I sincerely loved my uncle, this intelligence brought on a fever,
+which I struggled to conquer with all the energy of my mind; for, in my
+desolate state, I had it very much at heart to suckle you, my poor babe.
+You seemed my only tie to life, a cherub, to whom I wished to be a
+father, as well as a mother; and the double duty appeared to me to
+produce a proportionate increase of affection. But the pleasure I felt,
+while sustaining you, snatched from the wreck of hope, was cruelly damped
+by melancholy reflections on my widowed state--widowed by the death of my
+uncle. Of Mr. Venables I thought not, even when I thought of the felicity
+of loving your father, and how a mother's pleasure might be exalted, and
+her care softened by a husband's tenderness.--'Ought to be!' I exclaimed;
+and I endeavoured to drive away the tenderness that suffocated me; but
+my spirits were weak, and the unbidden tears would flow. 'Why was I,' I
+would ask thee, but thou didst not heed me,--'cut off from the
+participation of the sweetest pleasure of life?' I imagined with what
+extacy, after the pains of child-bed, I should have presented my little
+stranger, whom I had so long wished to view, to a respectable father, and
+with what maternal fondness I should have pressed them both to my
+heart!--Now I kissed her with less delight, though with the most
+endearing compassion, poor helpless one! when I perceived a slight
+resemblance of him, to whom she owed her existence; or, if any gesture
+reminded me of him, even in his best days, my heart heaved, and I pressed
+the innocent to my bosom, as if to purify it--yes, I blushed to think
+that its purity had been sullied, by allowing such a man to be its
+father.
+
+"After my recovery, I began to think of taking a house in the country, or
+of making an excursion on the continent, to avoid Mr. Venables; and to
+open my heart to new pleasures and affection. The spring was melting into
+summer, and you, my little companion, began to smile--that smile made
+hope bud out afresh, assuring me the world was not a desert. Your
+gestures were ever present to my fancy; and I dwelt on the joy I should
+feel when you would begin to walk and lisp. Watching your wakening mind,
+and shielding from every rude blast my tender blossom, I recovered my
+spirits--I dreamed not of the frost--'the killing frost,' to which you
+were destined to be exposed.--But I lose all patience--and execrate the
+injustice of the world--folly! ignorance!--I should rather call it; but,
+shut up from a free circulation of thought, and always pondering on the
+same griefs, I writhe under the torturing apprehensions, which ought to
+excite only honest indignation, or active compassion; and would, could I
+view them as the natural consequence of things. But, born a woman--and
+born to suffer, in endeavouring to repress my own emotions, I feel more
+acutely the various ills my sex are fated to bear--I feel that the evils
+they are subject to endure, degrade them so far below their oppressors,
+as almost to justify their tyranny; leading at the same time superficial
+reasoners to term that weakness the cause, which is only the consequence
+of short-sighted despotism.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[91-A] The introduction of Darnford as the deliverer of Maria, in an
+early stage of the history, is already stated (Chap. III.) to have been
+an after-thought of the author. This has probably caused the
+imperfectness of the manuscript in the above passage; though, at the same
+time, it must be acknowledged to be somewhat uncertain, whether Darnford
+is the stranger intended in this place. It appears from Chap. XVII. that
+an interference of a more decisive nature was designed to be attributed
+to him.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XIV.
+
+
+"AS my mind grew calmer, the visions of Italy again returned with their
+former glow of colouring; and I resolved on quitting the kingdom for a
+time, in search of the cheerfulness, that naturally results from a change
+of scene, unless we carry the barbed arrow with us, and only see what we
+feel.
+
+"During the period necessary to prepare for a long absence, I sent a
+supply to pay my father's debts, and settled my brothers in eligible
+situations; but my attention was not wholly engrossed by my family,
+though I do not think it necessary to enumerate the common exertions of
+humanity. The manner in which my uncle's property was settled, prevented
+me from making the addition to the fortune of my surviving sister, that I
+could have wished; but I had prevailed on him to bequeath her two
+thousand pounds, and she determined to marry a lover, to whom she had
+been some time attached. Had it not been for this engagement, I should
+have invited her to accompany me in my tour; and I might have escaped the
+pit, so artfully dug in my path, when I was the least aware of danger.
+
+"I had thought of remaining in England, till I weaned my child; but this
+state of freedom was too peaceful to last, and I had soon reason to wish
+to hasten my departure. A friend of Mr. Venables, the same attorney who
+had accompanied him in several excursions to hunt me from my hiding
+places, waited on me to propose a reconciliation. On my refusal, he
+indirectly advised me to make over to my husband--for husband he would
+term him--the greater part of the property I had at command, menacing me
+with continual persecution unless I complied, and that, as a last resort,
+he would claim the child. I did not, though intimidated by the last
+insinuation, scruple to declare, that I would not allow him to squander
+the money left to me for far different purposes, but offered him five
+hundred pounds, if he would sign a bond not to torment me any more. My
+maternal anxiety made me thus appear to waver from my first
+determination, and probably suggested to him, or his diabolical agent,
+the infernal plot, which has succeeded but too well.
+
+"The bond was executed; still I was impatient to leave England. Mischief
+hung in the air when we breathed the same; I wanted seas to divide us,
+and waters to roll between, till he had forgotten that I had the means of
+helping him through a new scheme. Disturbed by the late occurrences, I
+instantly prepared for my departure. My only delay was waiting for a
+maid-servant, who spoke French fluently, and had been warmly recommended
+to me. A valet I was advised to hire, when I fixed on my place of
+residence for any time.
+
+"My God, with what a light heart did I set out for Dover!--It was not my
+country, but my cares, that I was leaving behind. My heart seemed to
+bound with the wheels, or rather appeared the centre on which they
+twirled. I clasped you to my bosom, exclaiming 'And you will be
+safe--quite safe--when--we are once on board the packet.--Would we were
+there!' I smiled at my idle fears, as the natural effect of continual
+alarm; and I scarcely owned to myself that I dreaded Mr. Venables's
+cunning, or was conscious of the horrid delight he would feel, at forming
+stratagem after stratagem to circumvent me. I was already in the snare--I
+never reached the packet--I never saw thee more.--I grow breathless. I
+have scarcely patience to write down the details. The maid--the plausible
+woman I had hired--put, doubtless, some stupifying potion in what I ate
+or drank, the morning I left town. All I know is, that she must have
+quitted the chaise, shameless wretch! and taken (from my breast) my babe
+with her. How could a creature in a female form see me caress thee, and
+steal thee from my arms! I must stop, stop to repress a mother's anguish;
+left, in bitterness of soul, I imprecate the wrath of heaven on this
+tiger, who tore my only comfort from me.
+
+"How long I slept I know not; certainly many hours, for I woke at the
+close of day, in a strange confusion of thought. I was probably roused to
+recollection by some one thundering at a huge, unwieldy gate. Attempting
+to ask where I was, my voice died away, and I tried to raise it in vain,
+as I have done in a dream. I looked for my babe with affright; feared
+that it had fallen out of my lap, while I had so strangely forgotten
+her; and, such was the vague intoxication, I can give it no other name,
+in which I was plunged, I could not recollect when or where I last saw
+you; but I sighed, as if my heart wanted room to clear my head.
+
+"The gates opened heavily, and the sullen sound of many locks and bolts
+drawn back, grated on my very soul, before I was appalled by the creeking
+of the dismal hinges, as they closed after me. The gloomy pile was before
+me, half in ruins; some of the aged trees of the avenue were cut down,
+and left to rot where they fell; and as we approached some mouldering
+steps, a monstrous dog darted forwards to the length of his chain, and
+barked and growled infernally.
+
+"The door was opened slowly, and a murderous visage peeped out, with a
+lantern. 'Hush!' he uttered, in a threatning tone, and the affrighted
+animal stole back to his kennel. The door of the chaise flew back, the
+stranger put down the lantern, and clasped his dreadful arms around me.
+It was certainly the effect of the soporific draught, for, instead of
+exerting my strength, I sunk without motion, though not without sense, on
+his shoulder, my limbs refusing to obey my will. I was carried up the
+steps into a close-shut hall. A candle flaring in the socket, scarcely
+dispersed the darkness, though it displayed to me the ferocious
+countenance of the wretch who held me.
+
+"He mounted a wide staircase. Large figures painted on the walls seemed
+to start on me, and glaring eyes to meet me at every turn. Entering a
+long gallery, a dismal shriek made me spring out of my conductor's arms,
+with I know not what mysterious emotion of terror; but I fell on the
+floor, unable to sustain myself.
+
+"A strange-looking female started out of one of the recesses, and
+observed me with more curiosity than interest; till, sternly bid retire,
+she flitted back like a shadow. Other faces, strongly marked, or
+distorted, peeped through the half-opened doors, and I heard some
+incoherent sounds. I had no distinct idea where I could be--I looked on
+all sides, and almost doubted whether I was alive or dead.
+
+"Thrown on a bed, I immediately sunk into insensibility again; and next
+day, gradually recovering the use of reason, I began, starting
+affrighted from the conviction, to discover where I was confined--I
+insisted on seeing the master of the mansion--I saw him--and perceived
+that I was buried alive.--
+
+"Such, my child, are the events of thy mother's life to this dreadful
+moment--Should she ever escape from the fangs of her enemies, she will
+add the secrets of her prison-house--and--"
+
+Some lines were here crossed out, and the memoirs broke off abruptly with
+the names of Jemima and Darnford.
+
+
+
+
+APPENDIX.
+
+[ADVERTISEMENT.
+
+
+THE performance, with a fragment of which the reader has now been
+presented, was designed to consist of three parts. The preceding sheets
+were considered as constituting one of those parts. Those persons who in
+the perusal of the chapters, already written and in some degree finished
+by the author, have felt their hearts awakened, and their curiosity
+excited as to the sequel of the story, will, of course, gladly accept
+even of the broken paragraphs and half-finished sentences, which have
+been found committed to paper, as materials for the remainder. The
+fastidious and cold-hearted critic may perhaps feel himself repelled by
+the incoherent form in which they are presented. But an inquisitive
+temper willingly accepts the most imperfect and mutilated information,
+where better is not to be had: and readers, who in any degree resemble
+the author in her quick apprehension of sentiment, and of the pleasures
+and pains of imagination, will, I believe, find gratification, in
+contemplating sketches, which were designed in a short time to have
+received the finishing touches of her genius; but which must now for ever
+remain a mark to record the triumphs of mortality, over schemes of
+usefulness, and projects of public interest.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XV.
+
+
+DARNFORD returned the memoirs to Maria, with a most affectionate letter,
+in which he reasoned on "the absurdity of the laws respecting matrimony,
+which, till divorces could be more easily obtained, was," he declared,
+"the most insufferable bondage. Ties of this nature could not bind minds
+governed by superior principles; and such beings were privileged to act
+above the dictates of laws they had no voice in framing, if they had
+sufficient strength of mind to endure the natural consequence. In her
+case, to talk of duty, was a farce, excepting what was due to herself.
+Delicacy, as well as reason, forbade her ever to think of returning to
+her husband: was she then to restrain her charming sensibility through
+mere prejudice? These arguments were not absolutely impartial, for he
+disdained to conceal, that, when he appealed to her reason, he felt that
+he had some interest in her heart.--The conviction was not more
+transporting, than sacred--a thousand times a day, he asked himself how
+he had merited such happiness?--and as often he determined to purify the
+heart she deigned to inhabit--He intreated to be again admitted to her
+presence."
+
+He was; and the tear which glistened in his eye, when he respectfully
+pressed her to his bosom, rendered him peculiarly dear to the unfortunate
+mother. Grief had stilled the transports of love, only to render their
+mutual tenderness more touching. In former interviews, Darnford had
+contrived, by a hundred little pretexts, to sit near her, to take her
+hand, or to meet her eyes--now it was all soothing affection, and esteem
+seemed to have rivalled love. He adverted to her narrative, and spoke
+with warmth of the oppression she had endured.--His eyes, glowing with a
+lambent flame, told her how much he wished to restore her to liberty and
+love; but he kissed her hand, as if it had been that of a saint; and
+spoke of the loss of her child, as if it had been his own.--What could
+have been more flattering to Maria?--Every instance of self-denial was
+registered in her heart, and she loved him, for loving her too well to
+give way to the transports of passion.
+
+They met again and again; and Darnford declared, while passion suffused
+his cheeks, that he never before knew what it was to love.--
+
+One morning Jemima informed Maria, that her master intended to wait on
+her, and speak to her without witnesses. He came, and brought a letter
+with him, pretending that he was ignorant of its contents, though he
+insisted on having it returned to him. It was from the attorney already
+mentioned, who informed her of the death of her child, and hinted, "that
+she could not now have a legitimate heir, and that, would she make over
+the half of her fortune during life, she should be conveyed to Dover, and
+permitted to pursue her plan of travelling."
+
+Maria answered with warmth, "That she had no terms to make with the
+murderer of her babe, nor would she purchase liberty at the price of her
+own respect."
+
+She began to expostulate with her jailor; but he sternly bade her "Be
+silent--he had not gone so far, not to go further."
+
+Darnford came in the evening. Jemima was obliged to be absent, and she,
+as usual, locked the door on them, to prevent interruption or
+discovery.--The lovers were, at first, embarrassed; but fell insensibly
+into confidential discourse. Darnford represented, "that they might soon
+be parted," and wished her "to put it out of the power of fate to
+separate them."
+
+As her husband she now received him, and he solemnly pledged himself as
+her protector--and eternal friend.--
+
+There was one peculiarity in Maria's mind: she was more anxious not to
+deceive, than to guard against deception; and had rather trust without
+sufficient reason, than be for ever the prey of doubt. Besides, what are
+we, when the mind has, from reflection, a certain kind of elevation,
+which exalts the contemplation above the little concerns of prudence! We
+see what we wish, and make a world of our own--and, though reality may
+sometimes open a door to misery, yet the moments of happiness procured by
+the imagination, may, without a paradox, be reckoned among the solid
+comforts of life. Maria now, imagining that she had found a being of
+celestial mould--was happy,--nor was she deceived.--He was then plastic
+in her impassioned hand--and reflected all the sentiments which animated
+and warmed her.
+
+-- -- -- --
+-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
+-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XVI.
+
+
+ONE morning confusion seemed to reign in the house, and Jemima came in
+terror, to inform Maria, "that her master had left it, with a
+determination, she was assured (and too many circumstances corroborated
+the opinion, to leave a doubt of its truth) of never returning. I am
+prepared then," said Jemima, "to accompany you in your flight."
+
+Maria started up, her eyes darting towards the door, as if afraid that
+some one should fasten it on her for ever.
+
+Jemima continued, "I have perhaps no right now to expect the performance
+of your promise; but on you it depends to reconcile me with the human
+race."
+
+"But Darnford!"--exclaimed Maria, mournfully--sitting down again, and
+crossing her arms--"I have no child to go to, and liberty has lost its
+sweets."
+
+"I am much mistaken, if Darnford is not the cause of my master's
+flight--his keepers assure me, that they have promised to confine him two
+days longer, and then he will be free--you cannot see him; but they will
+give a letter to him the moment he is free.--In that inform him where he
+may find you in London; fix on some hotel. Give me your clothes; I will
+send them out of the house with mine, and we will slip out at the
+garden-gate. Write your letter while I make these arrangements, but lose
+no time!"
+
+In an agitation of spirit, not to be calmed, Maria began to write to
+Darnford. She called him by the sacred name of "husband," and bade him
+"hasten to her, to share her fortune, or she would return to him."--An
+hotel in the Adelphi was the place of rendezvous.
+
+The letter was sealed and given in charge; and with light footsteps, yet
+terrified at the sound of them, she descended, scarcely breathing, and
+with an indistinct fear that she should never get out at the garden gate.
+Jemima went first.
+
+A being, with a visage that would have suited one possessed by a devil,
+crossed the path, and seized Maria by the arm. Maria had no fear but of
+being detained--"Who are you? what are you?" for the form was scarcely
+human. "If you are made of flesh and blood," his ghastly eyes glared on
+her, "do not stop me!"
+
+"Woman," interrupted a sepulchral voice, "what have I to do with
+thee?"--Still he grasped her hand, muttering a curse.
+
+"No, no; you have nothing to do with me," she exclaimed, "this is a
+moment of life and death!"--
+
+With supernatural force she broke from him, and, throwing her arms round
+Jemima, cried, "Save me!" The being, from whose grasp she had loosed
+herself, took up a stone as they opened the door, and with a kind of
+hellish sport threw it after them. They were out of his reach.
+
+When Maria arrived in town, she drove to the hotel already fixed on. But
+she could not sit still--her child was ever before her; and all that had
+passed during her confinement, appeared to be a dream. She went to the
+house in the suburbs, where, as she now discovered, her babe had been
+sent. The moment she entered, her heart grew sick; but she wondered not
+that it had proved its grave. She made the necessary enquiries, and the
+church-yard was pointed out, in which it rested under a turf. A little
+frock which the nurse's child wore (Maria had made it herself) caught her
+eye. The nurse was glad to sell it for half-a-guinea, and Maria hastened
+away with the relic, and, re-entering the hackney-coach which waited for
+her, gazed on it, till she reached her hotel.
+
+She then waited on the attorney who had made her uncle's will, and
+explained to him her situation. He readily advanced her some of the
+money which still remained in his hands, and promised to take the whole
+of the case into consideration. Maria only wished to be permitted to
+remain in quiet--She found that several bills, apparently with her
+signature, had been presented to her agent, nor was she for a moment at a
+loss to guess by whom they had been forged; yet, equally averse to
+threaten or intreat, she requested her friend [the solicitor] to call on
+Mr. Venables. He was not to be found at home; but at length his agent,
+the attorney, offered a conditional promise to Maria, to leave her in
+peace, as long as she behaved with propriety, if she would give up the
+notes. Maria inconsiderately consented--Darnford was arrived, and she
+wished to be only alive to love; she wished to forget the anguish she
+felt whenever she thought of her child.
+
+They took a ready furnished lodging together, for she was above disguise;
+Jemima insisting on being considered as her house-keeper, and to receive
+the customary stipend. On no other terms would she remain with her
+friend.
+
+Darnford was indefatigable in tracing the mysterious circumstances of his
+confinement. The cause was simply, that a relation, a very distant one,
+to whom he was heir, had died intestate, leaving a considerable fortune.
+On the news of Darnford's arrival [in England, a person, intrusted with
+the management of the property, and who had the writings in his
+possession, determining, by one bold stroke, to strip Darnford of the
+succession,] had planned his confinement; and [as soon as he had taken
+the measures he judged most conducive to his object, this ruffian,
+together with his instrument,] the keeper of the private mad-house, left
+the kingdom. Darnford, who still pursued his enquiries, at last
+discovered that they had fixed their place of refuge at Paris.
+
+Maria and he determined therefore, with the faithful Jemima, to visit
+that metropolis, and accordingly were preparing for the journey, when
+they were informed that Mr. Venables had commenced an action against
+Darnford for seduction and adultery. The indignation Maria felt cannot be
+explained; she repented of the forbearance she had exercised in giving up
+the notes. Darnford could not put off his journey, without risking the
+loss of his property: Maria therefore furnished him with money for his
+expedition; and determined to remain in London till the termination of
+this affair.
+
+She visited some ladies with whom she had formerly been intimate, but was
+refused admittance; and at the opera, or Ranelagh, they could not
+recollect her. Among these ladies there were some, not her most intimate
+acquaintance, who were generally supposed to avail themselves of the
+cloke of marriage, to conceal a mode of conduct, that would for ever have
+damned their fame, had they been innocent, seduced girls. These
+particularly stood aloof.--Had she remained with her husband, practising
+insincerity, and neglecting her child to manage an intrigue, she would
+still have been visited and respected. If, instead of openly living with
+her lover, she could have condescended to call into play a thousand
+arts, which, degrading her own mind, might have allowed the people who
+were not deceived, to pretend to be so, she would have been caressed and
+treated like an honourable woman. "And Brutus[138-A] is an honourable
+man!" said Mark-Antony with equal sincerity.
+
+With Darnford she did not taste uninterrupted felicity; there was a
+volatility in his manner which often distressed her; but love gladdened
+the scene; besides, he was the most tender, sympathizing creature in the
+world. A fondness for the sex often gives an appearance of humanity to
+the behaviour of men, who have small pretensions to the reality; and they
+seem to love others, when they are only pursuing their own
+gratification. Darnford appeared ever willing to avail himself of her
+taste and acquirements, while she endeavoured to profit by his decision
+of character, and to eradicate some of the romantic notions, which had
+taken root in her mind, while in adversity she had brooded over visions
+of unattainable bliss.
+
+The real affections of life, when they are allowed to burst forth, are
+buds pregnant with joy and all the sweet emotions of the soul; yet they
+branch out with wild ease, unlike the artificial forms of felicity,
+sketched by an imagination painful alive. The substantial happiness,
+which enlarges and civilizes the mind, may be compared to the pleasure
+experienced in roving through nature at large, inhaling the sweet gale
+natural to the clime; while the reveries of a feverish imagination
+continually sport themselves in gardens full of aromatic shrubs, which
+cloy while they delight, and weaken the sense of pleasure they gratify.
+The heaven of fancy, below or beyond the stars, in this life, or in those
+ever-smiling regions surrounded by the unmarked ocean of futurity, have
+an insipid uniformity which palls. Poets have imagined scenes of bliss;
+but, fencing out sorrow, all the extatic emotions of the soul, and even
+its grandeur, seem to be equally excluded. We dose over the unruffled
+lake, and long to scale the rocks which fence the happy valley of
+contentment, though serpents hiss in the pathless desert, and danger
+lurks in the unexplored wiles. Maria found herself more indulgent as she
+was happier, and discovered virtues, in characters she had before
+disregarded, while chasing the phantoms of elegance and excellence, which
+sported in the meteors that exhale in the marshes of misfortune. The
+heart is often shut by romance against social pleasure; and, fostering a
+sickly sensibility, grows callous to the soft touches of humanity.
+
+To part with Darnford was indeed cruel.--It was to feel most painfully
+alone; but she rejoiced to think, that she should spare him the care and
+perplexity of the suit, and meet him again, all his own. Marriage, as at
+present constituted, she considered as leading to immorality--yet, as the
+odium of society impedes usefulness, she wished to avow her affection to
+Darnford, by becoming his wife according to established rules; not to be
+confounded with women who act from very different motives, though her
+conduct would be just the same without the ceremony as with it, and her
+expectations from him not less firm. The being summoned to defend herself
+from a charge which she was determined to plead guilty to, was still
+galling, as it roused bitter reflections on the situation of women in
+society.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[138-A] The name in the manuscript is by mistake written Caesar.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. XVII.
+
+
+SUCH was her state of mind when the dogs of law were let loose on her.
+Maria took the task of conducting Darnford's defence upon herself. She
+instructed his counsel to plead guilty to the charge of adultery; but to
+deny that of seduction.
+
+The counsel for the plaintiff opened the cause, by observing, "that his
+client had ever been an indulgent husband, and had borne with several
+defects of temper, while he had nothing criminal to lay to the charge of
+his wife. But that she left his house without assigning any cause. He
+could not assert that she was then acquainted with the defendant; yet,
+when he was once endeavouring to bring her back to her home, this man
+put the peace-officers to flight, and took her he knew not whither. After
+the birth of her child, her conduct was so strange, and a melancholy
+malady having afflicted one of the family, which delicacy forbade the
+dwelling on, it was necessary to confine her. By some means the defendant
+enabled her to make her escape, and they had lived together, in despite
+of all sense of order and decorum. The adultery was allowed, it was not
+necessary to bring any witnesses to prove it; but the seduction, though
+highly probable from the circumstances which he had the honour to state,
+could not be so clearly proved.--It was of the most atrocious kind, as
+decency was set at defiance, and respect for reputation, which shows
+internal compunction, utterly disregarded."
+
+A strong sense of injustice had silenced every emotion, which a mixture
+of true and false delicacy might otherwise have excited in Maria's bosom.
+She only felt in earnest to insist on the privilege of her nature. The
+sarcasms of society, and the condemnation of a mistaken world, were
+nothing to her, compared with acting contrary to those feelings which
+were the foundation of her principles. [She therefore eagerly put herself
+forward, instead of desiring to be absent, on this memorable occasion.]
+
+Convinced that the subterfuges of the law were disgraceful, she wrote a
+paper, which she expressly desired might be read in court:
+
+"Married when scarcely able to distinguish the nature of the engagement,
+I yet submitted to the rigid laws which enslave women, and obeyed the man
+whom I could no longer love. Whether the duties of the state are
+reciprocal, I mean not to discuss; but I can prove repeated infidelities
+which I overlooked or pardoned. Witnesses are not wanting to establish
+these facts. I at present maintain the child of a maid servant, sworn to
+him, and born after our marriage. I am ready to allow, that education and
+circumstances lead men to think and act with less delicacy, than the
+preservation of order in society demands from women; but surely I may
+without assumption declare, that, though I could excuse the birth, I
+could not the desertion of this unfortunate babe:--and, while I despised
+the man, it was not easy to venerate the husband. With proper
+restrictions however, I revere the institution which fraternizes the
+world. I exclaim against the laws which throw the whole weight of the
+yoke on the weaker shoulders, and force women, when they claim
+protectorship as mothers, to sign a contract, which renders them
+dependent on the caprice of the tyrant, whom choice or necessity has
+appointed to reign over them. Various are the cases, in which a woman
+ought to separate herself from her husband; and mine, I may be allowed
+emphatically to insist, comes under the description of the most
+aggravated.
+
+"I will not enlarge on those provocations which only the individual can
+estimate; but will bring forward such charges only, the truth of which is
+an insult upon humanity. In order to promote certain destructive
+speculations, Mr. Venables prevailed on me to borrow certain sums of a
+wealthy relation; and, when I refused further compliance, he thought of
+bartering my person; and not only allowed opportunities to, but urged, a
+friend from whom he borrowed money, to seduce me. On the discovery of
+this act of atrocity, I determined to leave him, and in the most decided
+manner, for ever. I consider all obligation as made void by his conduct;
+and hold, that schisms which proceed from want of principles, can never
+be healed.
+
+"He received a fortune with me to the amount of five thousand pounds. On
+the death of my uncle, convinced that I could provide for my child, I
+destroyed the settlement of that fortune. I required none of my property
+to be returned to me, nor shall enumerate the sums extorted from me
+during six years that we lived together.
+
+"After leaving, what the law considers as my home, I was hunted like a
+criminal from place to place, though I contracted no debts, and demanded
+no maintenance--yet, as the laws sanction such proceeding, and make women
+the property of their husbands, I forbear to animadvert. After the birth
+of my daughter, and the death of my uncle, who left a very considerable
+property to myself and child, I was exposed to new persecution; and,
+because I had, before arriving at what is termed years of discretion,
+pledged my faith, I was treated by the world, as bound for ever to a man
+whose vices were notorious. Yet what are the vices generally known, to
+the various miseries that a woman may be subject to, which, though
+deeply felt, eating into the soul, elude description, and may be glossed
+over! A false morality is even established, which makes all the virtue of
+women consist in chastity, submission, and the forgiveness of injuries.
+
+"I pardon my oppressor--bitterly as I lament the loss of my child, torn
+from me in the most violent manner. But nature revolts, and my soul
+sickens at the bare supposition, that it could ever be a duty to pretend
+affection, when a separation is necessary to prevent my feeling hourly
+aversion.
+
+"To force me to give my fortune, I was imprisoned--yes; in a private
+mad-house.--There, in the heart of misery, I met the man charged with
+seducing me. We became attached--I deemed, and ever shall deem, myself
+free. The death of my babe dissolved the only tie which subsisted
+between me and my, what is termed, lawful husband.
+
+"To this person, thus encountered, I voluntarily gave myself, never
+considering myself as any more bound to transgress the laws of moral
+purity, because the will of my husband might be pleaded in my excuse,
+than to transgress those laws to which [the policy of artificial society
+has] annexed [positive] punishments.----While no command of a husband can
+prevent a woman from suffering for certain crimes, she must be allowed to
+consult her conscience, and regulate her conduct, in some degree, by her
+own sense of right. The respect I owe to myself, demanded my strict
+adherence to my determination of never viewing Mr. Venables in the light
+of a husband, nor could it forbid me from encouraging another. If I am
+unfortunately united to an unprincipled man, am I for ever to be shut out
+from fulfilling the duties of a wife and mother?--I wish my country to
+approve of my conduct; but, if laws exist, made by the strong to oppress
+the weak, I appeal to my own sense of justice, and declare that I will
+not live with the individual, who has violated every moral obligation
+which binds man to man.
+
+"I protest equally against any charge being brought to criminate the man,
+whom I consider as my husband. I was six-and-twenty when I left Mr.
+Venables' roof; if ever I am to be supposed to arrive at an age to direct
+my own actions, I must by that time have arrived at it.--I acted with
+deliberation.--Mr. Darnford found me a forlorn and oppressed woman, and
+promised the protection women in the present state of society want.--But
+the man who now claims me--was he deprived of my society by this conduct?
+The question is an insult to common sense, considering where Mr. Darnford
+met me.--Mr. Venables' door was indeed open to me--nay, threats and
+intreaties were used to induce me to return; but why? Was affection or
+honour the motive?--I cannot, it is true, dive into the recesses of the
+human heart--yet I presume to assert, [borne out as I am by a variety of
+circumstances,] that he was merely influenced by the most rapacious
+avarice.
+
+"I claim then a divorce, and the liberty of enjoying, free from
+molestation, the fortune left to me by a relation, who was well aware of
+the character of the man with whom I had to contend.--I appeal to the
+justice and humanity of the jury--a body of men, whose private judgment
+must be allowed to modify laws, that must be unjust, because definite
+rules can never apply to indefinite circumstances--and I deprecate
+punishment upon the man of my choice, freeing him, as I solemnly do, from
+the charge of seduction.]
+
+"I did not put myself into a situation to justify a charge of adultery,
+till I had, from conviction, shaken off the fetters which bound me to Mr.
+Venables.--While I lived with him, I defy the voice of calumny to sully
+what is termed the fair fame of woman.--Neglected by my husband, I never
+encouraged a lover; and preserved with scrupulous care, what is termed my
+honour, at the expence of my peace, till he, who should have been its
+guardian, laid traps to ensnare me. From that moment I believed myself,
+in the sight of heaven, free--and no power on earth shall force me to
+renounce my resolution."
+
+The judge, in summing up the evidence, alluded to "the fallacy of letting
+women plead their feelings, as an excuse for the violation of the
+marriage-vow. For his part, he had always determined to oppose all
+innovation, and the new-fangled notions which incroached on the good old
+rules of conduct. We did not want French principles in public or private
+life--and, if women were allowed to plead their feelings, as an excuse or
+palliation of infidelity, it was opening a flood-gate for immorality.
+What virtuous woman thought of her feelings?--It was her duty to love and
+obey the man chosen by her parents and relations, who were qualified by
+their experience to judge better for her, than she could for herself. As
+to the charges brought against the husband, they were vague, supported by
+no witnesses, excepting that of imprisonment in a private mad-house. The
+proofs of an insanity in the family, might render that however a prudent
+measure; and indeed the conduct of the lady did not appear that of a
+person of sane mind. Still such a mode of proceeding could not be
+justified, and might perhaps entitle the lady [in another court] to a
+sentence of separation from bed and board, during the joint lives of the
+parties; but he hoped that no Englishman would legalize adultery, by
+enabling the adulteress to enrich her seducer. Too many restrictions
+could not be thrown in the way of divorces, if we wished to maintain the
+sanctity of marriage; and, though they might bear a little hard on a few,
+very few individuals, it was evidently for the good of the whole."
+
+
+
+
+CONCLUSION,
+
+BY THE EDITOR.
+
+
+VERY few hints exist respecting the plan of the remainder of the work. I
+find only two detached sentences, and some scattered heads for the
+continuation of the story. I transcribe the whole.
+
+
+I.
+
+"Darnford's letters were affectionate; but circumstances occasioned
+delays, and the miscarriage of some letters rendered the reception of
+wished-for answers doubtful: his return was necessary to calm Maria's
+mind."
+
+
+II.
+
+"As Darnford had informed her that his business was settled, his delaying
+to return seemed extraordinary; but love to excess, excludes fear or
+suspicion."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The scattered heads for the continuation of the story, are as
+follow[159-A].
+
+
+I.
+
+"Trial for adultery--Maria defends herself--A separation from bed and
+board is the consequence--Her fortune is thrown into chancery--Darnford
+obtains a part of his property--Maria goes into the country."
+
+
+II.
+
+"A prosecution for adultery commenced--Trial--Darnford sets out for
+France--Letters--Once more pregnant--He returns--Mysterious
+behaviour--Visit--Expectation--Discovery--Interview--Consequence."
+
+
+III.
+
+"Sued by her husband--Damages awarded to him--Separation from bed and
+board--Darnford goes abroad--Maria into the country--Provides for her
+father--Is shunned--Returns to London--Expects to see her lover--The
+rack of expectation--Finds herself again with child--Delighted--A
+discovery--A visit--A miscarriage--Conclusion."
+
+
+IV.
+
+"Divorced by her husband--Her lover
+unfaithful--Pregnancy--Miscarriage--Suicide."
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[The following passage appears in some respects to deviate from the
+preceding hints. It is superscribed]
+
+
+"THE END.
+
+
+"She swallowed the laudanum; her soul was calm--the tempest had
+subsided--and nothing remained but an eager longing to forget
+herself--to fly from the anguish she endured to escape from thought--from
+this hell of disappointment.
+
+"Still her eyes closed not--one remembrance with frightful velocity
+followed another--All the incidents of her life were in arms, embodied to
+assail her, and prevent her sinking into the sleep of death.--Her
+murdered child again appeared to her, mourning for the babe of which she
+was the tomb.--'And could it have a nobler?--Surely it is better to die
+with me, than to enter on life without a mother's care!--I cannot
+live!--but could I have deserted my child the moment it was born?--thrown
+it on the troubled wave of life, without a hand to support it?'--She
+looked up: 'What have I not suffered!--may I find a father where I am
+going!'--Her head turned; a stupor ensued; a faintness--'Have a little
+patience,' said Maria, holding her swimming head (she thought of her
+mother), 'this cannot last long; and what is a little bodily pain to the
+pangs I have endured?'
+
+"A new vision swam before her. Jemima seemed to enter--leading a little
+creature, that, with tottering footsteps, approached the bed. The voice
+of Jemima sounding as at a distance, called her--she tried to listen, to
+speak, to look!
+
+"'Behold your child!' exclaimed Jemima. Maria started off the bed, and
+fainted.--Violent vomiting followed.
+
+"When she was restored to life, Jemima addressed her with great
+solemnity: '------ led me to suspect, that your husband and brother had
+deceived you, and secreted the child. I would not torment you with
+doubtful hopes, and I left you (at a fatal moment) to search for the
+child!--I snatched her from misery--and (now she is alive again) would
+you leave her alone in the world, to endure what I have endured?'
+
+"Maria gazed wildly at her, her whole frame was convulsed with emotion;
+when the child, whom Jemima had been tutoring all the journey, uttered
+the word 'Mamma!' She caught her to her bosom, and burst into a passion
+of tears--then, resting the child gently on the bed, as if afraid of
+killing it,--she put her hand to her eyes, to conceal as it were the
+agonizing struggle of her soul. She remained silent for five minutes,
+crossing her arms over her bosom, and reclining her head,--then
+exclaimed: 'The conflict is over!--I will live for my child!'"
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+A few readers perhaps, in looking over these hints, will wonder how it
+could have been practicable, without tediousness, or remitting in any
+degree the interest of the story, to have filled, from these slight
+sketches, a number of pages, more considerable than those which have been
+already presented. But, in reality, these hints, simple as they are, are
+pregnant with passion and distress. It is the refuge of barren authors
+only, to crowd their fictions with so great a number of events, as to
+suffer no one of them to sink into the reader's mind. It is the province
+of true genius to develop events, to discover their capabilities, to
+ascertain the different passions and sentiments with which they are
+fraught, and to diversify them with incidents, that give reality to the
+picture, and take a hold upon the mind of a reader of taste, from which
+they can never be loosened. It was particularly the design of the author,
+in the present instance, to make her story subordinate to a great moral
+purpose, that "of exhibiting the misery and oppression, peculiar to
+women, that arise out of the partial laws and customs of society.--This
+view restrained her fancy[166-A]." It was necessary for her, to place in
+a striking point of view, evils that are too frequently overlooked, and
+to drag into light those details of oppression, of which the grosser and
+more insensible part of mankind make little account.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[159-A] To understand these minutes, it is necessary the reader should
+consider each of them as setting out from the same point in the story,
+_viz._ the point to which it is brought down in the preceding chapter.
+
+[166-A] See author's preface.
+
+
+
+
+LESSONS.
+
+
+ADVERTISEMENT,
+
+BY THE EDITOR.
+
+
+THE following pages will, I believe, be judged by every reader of taste
+to have been worth preserving, among the other testimonies the author
+left behind her, of her genius and the soundness of her understanding.
+To such readers I leave the task of comparing these lessons, with other
+works of the same nature previously published. It is obvious that the
+author has struck out a path of her own, and by no means intrenched upon
+the plans of her predecessors.
+
+It may however excite surprise in some persons to find these papers
+annexed to the conclusion of a novel. All I have to offer on this
+subject, consists in the following considerations:
+
+First, something is to be allowed for the difficulty of arranging the
+miscellaneous papers upon very different subjects, which will frequently
+constitute an author's posthumous works.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Secondly, the small portion they occupy in the present volume, will
+perhaps be accepted as an apology, by such good-natured readers (if any
+such there are), to whom the perusal of them shall be a matter of perfect
+indifference.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Thirdly, the circumstance which determined me in annexing them to the
+present work, was the slight association (in default of a strong one)
+between the affectionate and pathetic manner in which Maria Venables
+addresses her infant, in the Wrongs of Woman; and the agonising and
+painful sentiment with which the author originally bequeathed these
+papers, as a legacy for the benefit of her child.
+
+
+
+
+LESSONS.
+
+_The first book of a series which I intended to have written for my
+unfortunate girl[175-A]._
+
+
+LESSON I.
+
+CAT. Dog. Cow. Horse. Sheep. Pig. Bird. Fly.
+
+Man. Boy. Girl. Child.
+
+Head. Hair. Face. Nose. Mouth. Chin. Neck. Arms. Hand. Leg. Foot. Back.
+Breast.
+
+House. Wall. Field. Street. Stone. Grass.
+
+Bed. Chair. Door. Pot. Spoon. Knife. Fork. Plate. Cup. Box. Boy. Bell.
+
+Tree. Leaf. Stick. Whip. Cart. Coach.
+
+Frock. Hat. Coat. Shoes. Shift. Cap.
+
+Bread. Milk. Tea. Meat. Drink. Cake.
+
+
+LESSON II.
+
+Come. Walk. Run. Go. Jump. Dance. Ride. Sit. Stand. Play. Hold. Shake.
+Speak. Sing. Cry. Laugh. Call. Fall.
+
+Day. Night. Sun. Moon. Light. Dark. Sleep. Wake.
+
+Wash. Dress. Kiss. Comb.
+
+Fire. Hot. Burn. Wind. Rain. Cold.
+
+Hurt. Tear. Break. Spill.
+
+Book. See. Look.
+
+Sweet. Good. Clean.
+
+Gone. Lost. Hide. Keep. Give. Take.
+
+One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.
+
+White. Black. Red. Blue. Green. Brown.
+
+
+LESSON III.
+
+STROKE the cat. Play with the Dog. Eat the bread. Drink the milk. Hold
+the cup. Lay down the knife.
+
+Look at the fly. See the horse. Shut the door. Bring the chair. Ring the
+bell. Get your book.
+
+Hide your face. Wipe your nose. Wash your hands. Dirty hands. Why do you
+cry? A clean mouth. Shake hands. I love you. Kiss me now. Good girl.
+
+The bird sings. The fire burns. The cat jumps. The dog runs. The bird
+flies. The cow lies down. The man laughs. The child cries.
+
+
+LESSON IV.
+
+LET me comb your head. Ask Betty to wash your face. Go and see for some
+bread. Drink milk, if you are dry. Play on the floor with the ball. Do
+not touch the ink; you will black your hands.
+
+What do you want to say to me? Speak slow, not so fast. Did you fall? You
+will not cry, not you; the baby cries. Will you walk in the fields?
+
+
+LESSON V.
+
+COME to me, my little girl. Are you tired of playing? Yes. Sit down and
+rest yourself, while I talk to you.
+
+Have you seen the baby? Poor little thing. O here it comes. Look at him.
+How helpless he is. Four years ago you were as feeble as this very little
+boy.
+
+See, he cannot hold up his head. He is forced to lie on his back, if his
+mamma do not turn him to the right or left side, he will soon begin to
+cry. He cries to tell her, that he is tired with lying on his back.
+
+
+LESSON VI.
+
+PERHAPS he is hungry. What shall we give him to eat? Poor fellow, he
+cannot eat. Look in his mouth, he has no teeth.
+
+How did you do when you were a baby like him? You cannot tell. Do you
+want to know? Look then at the dog, with her pretty puppy. You could not
+help yourself as well as the puppy. You could only open your mouth, when
+you were lying, like William, on my knee. So I put you to my breast, and
+you sucked, as the puppy sucks now, for there was milk enough for you.
+
+
+LESSON VII.
+
+WHEN you were hungry, you began to cry, because you could not speak. You
+were seven months without teeth, always sucking. But after you got one,
+you began to gnaw a crust of bread. It was not long before another came
+pop. At ten months you had four pretty white teeth, and you used to bite
+me. Poor mamma! Still I did not cry, because I am not a child, but you
+hurt me very much. So I said to papa, it is time the little girl should
+eat. She is not naughty, yet she hurts me. I have given her a crust of
+bread, and I must look for some other milk.
+
+The cow has got plenty, and her jumping calf eats grass very well. He has
+got more teeth than my little girl. Yes, says papa, and he tapped you on
+the cheek, you are old enough to learn to eat? Come to me, and I will
+teach you, my little dear, for you must not hurt poor mamma, who has
+given you her milk, when you could not take any thing else.
+
+
+LESSON VIII.
+
+YOU were then on the carpet, for you could not walk well. So when you
+were in a hurry, you used to run quick, quick, quick, on your hands and
+feet, like the dog.
+
+Away you ran to papa, and putting both your arms round his leg, for your
+hands were not big enough, you looked up at him, and laughed. What did
+this laugh say, when you could not speak? Cannot you guess by what you
+now say to papa?--Ah! it was, Play with me, papa!--play with me!
+
+Papa began to smile, and you knew that the smile was always--Yes. So you
+got a ball, and papa threw it along the floor--Roll--roll--roll; and you
+ran after it again--and again. How pleased you were. Look at William, he
+smiles; but you could laugh loud--Ha! ha! ha!--Papa laughed louder than
+the little girl, and rolled the ball still faster.
+
+Then he put the ball on a chair, and you were forced to take hold of the
+back, and stand up to reach it. At last you reached too far, and down you
+fell: not indeed on your face, because you put out your hands. You were
+not much hurt; but the palms of your hands smarted with the pain, and you
+began to cry, like a little child.
+
+It is only very little children who cry when they are hurt; and it is to
+tell their mamma, that something is the matter with them. Now you can
+come to me, and say, Mamma, I have hurt myself. Pray rub my hand: it
+smarts. Put something on it, to make it well. A piece of rag, to stop the
+blood. You are not afraid of a little blood--not you. You scratched your
+arm with a pin: it bled a little; but it did you no harm. See, the skin
+is grown over it again.
+
+
+LESSON IX.
+
+TAKE care not to put pins in your mouth, because they will stick in your
+throat, and give you pain. Oh! you cannot think what pain a pin would
+give you in your throat, should it remain there: but, if you by chance
+swallow it, I should be obliged to give you, every morning, something
+bitter to drink. You never tasted any thing so bitter! and you would grow
+very sick. I never put pins in my mouth; but I am older than you, and
+know how to take care of myself.
+
+My mamma took care of me, when I was a little girl, like you. She bade me
+never put any thing in my mouth, without asking her what it was.
+
+When you were a baby, with no more sense than William, you put every
+thing in your mouth to gnaw, to help your teeth to cut through the skin.
+Look at the puppy, how he bites that piece of wood. William presses his
+gums against my finger. Poor boy! he is so young, he does not know what
+he is doing. When you bite any thing, it is because you are hungry.
+
+
+LESSON X.
+
+SEE how much taller you are than William. In four years you have learned
+to eat, to walk, to talk. Why do you smile? You can do much more, you
+think: you can wash your hands and face. Very well. I should never kiss a
+dirty face. And you can comb your head with the pretty comb you always
+put by in your own drawer. To be sure, you do all this to be ready to
+take a walk with me. You would be obliged to stay at home, if you could
+not comb your own hair. Betty is busy getting the dinner ready, and only
+brushes William's hair, because he cannot do it for himself.
+
+Betty is making an apple-pye. You love an apple-pye; but I do not bid you
+make one. Your hands are not strong enough to mix the butter and flour
+together; and you must not try to pare the apples, because you cannot
+manage a great knife.
+
+Never touch the large knives: they are very sharp, and you might cut your
+finger to the bone. You are a little girl, and ought to have a little
+knife. When you are as tall as I am, you shall have a knife as large as
+mine; and when you are as strong as I am, and have learned to manage it,
+you will not hurt yourself.
+
+You can trundle a hoop, you say; and jump over a stick. O, I forgot!--and
+march like the men in the red coats, when papa plays a pretty tune on the
+fiddle.
+
+
+LESSON XI.
+
+WHAT, you think that you shall soon be able to dress yourself entirely? I
+am glad of it: I have something else to do. You may go, and look for your
+frock in the drawer; but I will tie it, till you are stronger. Betty will
+tie it, when I am busy.
+
+I button my gown myself: I do not want a maid to assist me, when I am
+dressing. But you have not yet got sense enough to do it properly, and
+must beg somebody to help you, till you are older.
+
+Children grow older and wiser at the same time. William is not able to
+take a piece of meat, because he has not got the sense which would make
+him think that, without teeth, meat would do him harm. He cannot tell
+what is good for him.
+
+The sense of children grows with them. You know much more than William,
+now you walk alone, and talk; but you do not know as much as the boys and
+girls you see playing yonder, who are half as tall again as you; and they
+do not know half as much as their fathers and mothers, who are men and
+women grown. Papa and I were children, like you; and men and women took
+care of us. I carry William, because he is too weak to walk. I lift you
+over a stile, and over the gutter, when you cannot jump over it.
+
+You know already, that potatoes will not do you any harm: but I must
+pluck the fruit for you, till you are wise enough to know the ripe apples
+and pears. The hard ones would make you sick, and then you must take
+physic. You do not love physic: I do not love it any more than you. But I
+have more sense than you; therefore I take care not to eat unripe fruit,
+or any thing else that would make my stomach ache, or bring out ugly red
+spots on my face.
+
+When I was a child, my mamma chose the fruit for me, to prevent my making
+myself sick. I was just like you; I used to ask for what I saw, without
+knowing whether it was good or bad. Now I have lived a long time, I know
+what is good; I do not want any body to tell me.
+
+
+LESSON XII.
+
+LOOK at those two dogs. The old one brings the ball to me in a moment;
+the young one does not know how. He must be taught.
+
+I can cut your shift in a proper shape. You would not know how to begin.
+You would spoil it; but you will learn.
+
+John digs in the garden, and knows when to put the seed in the ground.
+You cannot tell whether it should be in the winter or summer. Try to find
+it out. When do the trees put out their leaves? In the spring, you say,
+after the cold weather. Fruit would not grow ripe without very warm
+weather. Now I am sure you can guess why the summer is the season for
+fruit.
+
+Papa knows that peas and beans are good for us to eat with our meat. You
+are glad when you see them; but if he did not think for you, and have the
+seed put in the ground, we should have no peas or beans.
+
+
+LESSON XIII.
+
+POOR child, she cannot do much for herself. When I let her do any thing
+for me, it is to please her: for I could do it better myself.
+
+Oh! the poor puppy has tumbled off the stool. Run and stroak him. Put a
+little milk in a saucer to comfort him. You have more sense than he. You
+can pour the milk into the saucer without spilling it. He would cry for a
+day with hunger, without being able to get it. You are wiser than the
+dog, you must help him. The dog will love you for it, and run after you.
+I feed you and take care of you: you love me and follow me for it.
+
+When the book fell down on your foot, it gave you great pain. The poor
+dog felt the same pain just now.
+
+Take care not to hurt him when you play with him. And every morning leave
+a little milk in your bason for him. Do not forget to put the bason in a
+corner, lest somebody should fall over it.
+
+When the snow covers the ground, save the crumbs of bread for the birds.
+In the summer they find feed enough, and do not want you to think about
+them.
+
+I make broth for the poor man who is sick. A sick man is like a child, he
+cannot help himself.
+
+
+LESSON X.
+
+WHEN I caught cold some time ago, I had such a pain in my head, I could
+scarcely hold it up. Papa opened the door very softly, because he loves
+me. You love me, yet you made a noise. You had not the sense to know that
+it made my head worse, till papa told you.
+
+Papa had a pain in the stomach, and he would not eat the fine cherries or
+grapes on the table. When I brought him a cup of camomile tea, he drank
+it without saying a word, or making an ugly face. He knows that I love
+him, and that I would not give him any thing to drink that has a bad
+taste, if it were not to do him good.
+
+You asked me for some apples when your stomach ached; but I was not angry
+with you. If you had been as wise as papa, you would have said, I will
+not eat the apples to-day, I must take some camomile tea.
+
+You say that you do not know how to think. Yes; you do a little. The
+other day papa was tired; he had been walking about all the morning.
+After dinner he fell asleep on the sopha. I did not bid you be quiet; but
+you thought of what papa said to you, when my head ached. This made you
+think that you ought not to make a noise, when papa was resting himself.
+So you came to me, and said to me, very softly, Pray reach me my ball,
+and I will go and play in the garden, till papa wakes.
+
+You were going out; but thinking again, you came back to me on your
+tip-toes. Whisper----whisper. Pray mama, call me, when papa wakes; for I
+shall be afraid to open the door to see, lest I should disturb him.
+
+Away you went.--Creep--creep--and shut the door as softly as I could have
+done myself.
+
+That was thinking. When a child does wrong at first, she does not know
+any better. But, after she has been told that she must not disturb mama,
+when poor mama is unwell, she thinks herself, that she must not wake papa
+when he is tired.
+
+Another day we will see if you can think about any thing else.
+
+THE END.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[175-A] This title which is indorsed on the back of the manuscript, I
+conclude to have been written in a period of desperation, in the month of
+October, 1795.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. III.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+LETTERS
+AND
+MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.
+
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+
+
+VOL. I.
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE.
+
+
+THE following Letters may possibly be found to contain the finest
+examples of the language of sentiment and passion ever presented to the
+world. They bear a striking resemblance to the celebrated romance of
+Werter, though the incidents to which they relate are of a very different
+cast. Probably the readers to whom Werter is incapable of affording
+pleasure, will receive no delight from the present publication. The
+editor apprehends that, in the judgment of those best qualified to
+decide upon the comparison, these Letters will be admitted to have the
+superiority over the fiction of Goethe. They are the offspring of a
+glowing imagination, and a heart penetrated with the passion it essays to
+describe.
+
+To the series of letters constituting the principal article in these two
+volumes, are added various pieces, none of which, it is hoped, will be
+found discreditable to the talents of the author. The slight fragment of
+Letters on the Management of Infants, may be thought a trifle; but it
+seems to have some value, as presenting to us with vividness the
+intention of the writer on this important subject. The publication of a
+few select Letters to Mr. Johnson, appeared to be at once a just monument
+to the sincerity of his friendship, and a valuable and interesting
+specimen of the mind of the writer. The Letter on the Present Character
+of the French Nation, the Extract of the Cave of Fancy, a Tale, and the
+Hints for the Second Part of the Rights of Woman, may, I believe, safely
+be left to speak for themselves. The Essay on Poetry and our Relish for
+the Beauties of Nature, appeared in the Monthly Magazine for April last,
+and is the only piece in this collection which has previously found its
+way to the press.
+
+
+
+
+LETTERS.
+
+
+LETTER I.
+
+Two o'Clock.
+
+MY dear love, after making my arrangements for our snug dinner to-day, I
+have been taken by storm, and obliged to promise to dine, at an early
+hour, with the Miss ----s, the _only_ day they intend to pass here. I
+shall however leave the key in the door, and hope to find you at my
+fire-side when I return, about eight o'clock. Will you not wait for poor
+Joan?--whom you will find better, and till then think very
+affectionately of her.
+
+Yours, truly,
+
+* * * *
+
+I am sitting down to dinner; so do not send an answer.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER II.
+
+Past Twelve o'Clock, Monday night.
+
+[August.]
+
+I OBEY an emotion of my heart, which made me think of wishing thee, my
+love, good-night! before I go to rest, with more tenderness than I can
+to-morrow, when writing a hasty line or two under Colonel ----'s eye. You
+can scarcely imagine with what pleasure I anticipate the day, when we
+are to begin almost to live together; and you would smile to hear how
+many plans of employment I have in my head, now that I am confident my
+heart has found peace in your bosom.--Cherish me with that dignified
+tenderness, which I have only found in you; and your own dear girl will
+try to keep under a quickness of feeling, that has sometimes given you
+pain--Yes, I will be _good_, that I may deserve to be happy; and whilst
+you love me, I cannot again fall into the miserable state, which rendered
+life a burthen almost too heavy to be borne.
+
+But, good-night!--God bless you! Sterne says, that is equal to a
+kiss--yet I would rather give you the kiss into the bargain, glowing with
+gratitude to Heaven, and affection to you. I like the word affection,
+because it signifies something habitual; and we are soon to meet, to try
+whether we have mind enough to keep our hearts warm.
+
+* * * *
+
+I will be at the barrier a little after ten o'clock
+to-morrow[4-A].--Yours--
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER III.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+YOU have often called me, dear girl, but you would now say good, did you
+know how very attentive I have been to the ---- ever since I came to
+Paris. I am not however going to trouble you with the account, because I
+like to see your eyes praise me; and, Milton insinuates, that, during
+such recitals, there are interruptions, not ungrateful to the heart, when
+the honey that drops from the lips is not merely words.
+
+Yet, I shall not (let me tell you before these people enter, to force me
+to huddle away my letter) be content with only a kiss of DUTY--you _must_
+be glad to see me--because you are glad--or I will make love to the
+_shade_ of Mirabeau, to whom my heart continually turned, whilst I was
+talking with Madame ----, forcibly telling me, that it will ever have
+sufficient warmth to love, whether I will or not, sentiment, though I so
+highly respect principle.----
+
+Not that I think Mirabeau utterly devoid of principles--Far from it--and,
+if I had not begun to form a new theory respecting men, I should, in the
+vanity of my heart, have _imagined_ that _I_ could have made something of
+his----it was composed of such materials--Hush! here they come--and love
+flies away in the twinkling of an eye, leaving a little brush of his wing
+on my pale cheeks.
+
+I hope to see Dr. ---- this morning; I am going to Mr. ----'s to meet
+him. ----, and some others, are invited to dine with us to-day; and
+to-morrow I am to spend the day with ----.
+
+I shall probably not be able to return to ---- to-morrow; but it is no
+matter, because I must take a carriage, I have so many books, that I
+immediately want, to take with me.--On Friday then I shall expect you to
+dine with me--and, if you come a little before dinner, it is so long
+since I have seen you, you will not be scolded by yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IV[7-A].
+
+Friday Morning [September.]
+
+A MAN, whom a letter from Mr. ----previously announced, called here
+yesterday for the payment of a draft; and, as he seemed disappointed at
+not finding you at home, I sent him to Mr. ----. I have since seen him,
+and he tells me that he has settled the business.
+
+So much for business!--May I venture to talk a little longer about less
+weighty affairs?--How are you?--I have been following you all along the
+road this comfortless weather; for, when I am absent from those I love,
+my imagination is as lively, as if my senses had never been gratified by
+their presence--I was going to say caresses--and why should I not? I have
+found out that I have more mind than you, in one respect; because I can,
+without any violent effort of reason, find food for love in the same
+object, much longer than you can.--The way to my senses is through my
+heart; but, forgive me! I think there is sometimes a shorter cut to
+yours.
+
+With ninety-nine men out of a hundred, a very sufficient dash of folly is
+necessary to render a woman _piquante_, a soft word for desirable; and,
+beyond these casual ebullitions of sympathy, few look for enjoyment by
+fostering a passion in their hearts. One reason, in short, why I wish my
+whole sex to become wiser, is, that the foolish ones may not, by their
+pretty folly, rob those whose sensibility keeps down their vanity, of the
+few roses that afford them some solace in the thorny road of life.
+
+I do not know how I fell into these reflections, excepting one thought
+produced it--that these continual separations were necessary to warm your
+affection.--Of late, we are always separating.--Crack!--crack!--and away
+you go.--This joke wears the sallow cast of thought; for, though I began
+to write cheerfully, some melancholy tears have found their way into my
+eyes, that linger there, whilst a glow of tenderness at my heart whispers
+that you are one of the best creatures in the world.--Pardon then the
+vagaries of a mind, that has been almost "crazed by care," as well as
+"crossed in hapless love," and bear with me a _little_ longer!--When we
+are settled in the country together, more duties will open before me, and
+my heart, which now, trembling into peace, is agitated by every emotion
+that awakens the remembrance of old griefs, will learn to rest on yours,
+with that dignity your character, not to talk of my own, demands.
+
+Take care of yourself--and write soon to your own girl (you may add dear,
+if you please) who sincerely loves you, and will try to convince you of
+it, by becoming happier.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER V.
+
+Sunday Night.
+
+I HAVE just received your letter, and feel as if I could not go to bed
+tranquilly without saying a few words in reply--merely to tell you, that
+my mind is serene, and my heart affectionate.
+
+Ever since you last saw me inclined to faint, I have felt some gentle
+twitches, which make me begin to think, that I am nourishing a creature
+who will soon be sensible of my care.--This thought has not only produced
+an overflowing of tenderness to you, but made me very attentive to calm
+my mind and take exercise, lest I should destroy an object, in whom we
+are to have a mutual interest, you know. Yesterday--do not
+smile!--finding that I had hurt myself by lifting precipitately a large
+log of wood, I sat down in an agony, till I felt those said twitches
+again.
+
+Are you very busy?
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+So you may reckon on its being finished soon, though not before you come
+home, unless you are detained longer than I now allow myself to believe
+you will.--
+
+Be that as it may, write to me, my best love, and bid me be
+patient--kindly--and the expressions of kindness will again beguile the
+time, as sweetly as they have done to-night.--Tell me also over and over
+again, that your happiness (and you deserve to be happy!) is closely
+connected with mine, and I will try to dissipate, as they rise, the fumes
+of former discontent, that have too often clouded the sunshine, which you
+have endeavoured to diffuse through my mind. God bless you! Take care of
+yourself, and remember with tenderness your affectionate
+
+* * * *
+
+I am going to rest very happy, and you have made me so.--This is the
+kindest good-night I can utter.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VI.
+
+Friday Morning.
+
+I AM glad to find that other people can be unreasonable, as well as
+myself--for be it known to thee, that I answered thy _first_ letter, the
+very night it reached me (Sunday), though thou couldst not receive it
+before Wednesday, because it was not sent off till the next day.--There
+is a full, true, and particular account.--
+
+Yet I am not angry with thee, my love, for I think that it is a proof of
+stupidity, and likewise of a milk-and-water affection, which comes to the
+same thing, when the temper is governed by a square and compass.--There
+is nothing picturesque in this straight-lined equality, and the passions
+always give grace to the actions.
+
+Recollection now makes my heart bound to thee; but, it is not to thy
+money-getting face, though I cannot be seriously displeased with the
+exertion which increases my esteem, or rather is what I should have
+expected from thy character.--No; I have thy honest countenance before
+me--Pop--relaxed by tenderness; a little--little wounded by my whims; and
+thy eyes glistening with sympathy.--Thy lips then feel softer than
+soft--and I rest my cheek on thine, forgetting all the world.--I have not
+left the hue of love out of the picture--the rosy glow; and fancy has
+spread it over my own cheeks, I believe, for I feel them burning, whilst
+a delicious tear trembles in my eye, that would be all your own, if a
+grateful emotion directed to the Father of nature, who has made me thus
+alive to happiness, did not give more warmth to the sentiment it
+divides--I must pause a moment.
+
+Need I tell you that I am tranquil after writing thus?--I do not know
+why, but I have more confidence in your affection, when absent, than
+present; nay, I think that you must love me, for, in the sincerity of my
+heart let me say it, I believe I deserve your tenderness, because I am
+true, and have a degree of sensibility that you can see and relish.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VII.
+
+Sunday Morning [December 29.]
+
+YOU seem to have taken up your abode at H----. Pray sir! when do you
+think of coming home? or, to write very considerately, when will business
+permit you? I shall expect (as the country people say in England) that
+you will make a _power_ of money to indemnify me for your absence.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Well! but, my love, to the old story--am I to see you this week, or this
+month?--I do not know what you are about--for, as you did not tell me, I
+would not ask Mr. ----, who is generally pretty communicative.
+
+I long to see Mrs. ------; not to hear from you, so do not give yourself
+airs, but to get a letter from Mr. ----. And I am half angry with you for
+not informing me whether she had brought one with her or not.--On this
+score I will cork up some of the kind things that were ready to drop from
+my pen, which has never been dipt in gall when addressing you; or, will
+only suffer an exclamation--"The creature!" or a kind look, to escape me,
+when I pass the slippers--which I could not remove from my _salle_ door,
+though they are not the handsomest of their kind.
+
+Be not too anxious to get money!--for nothing worth having is to be
+purchased. God bless you.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VIII.
+
+Monday Night [December 30.]
+
+MY best love, your letter to-night was particularly grateful to my heart,
+depressed by the letters I received by ----, for he brought me several,
+and the parcel of books directed to Mr. ------ was for me. Mr. ------'s
+letter was long and very affectionate; but the account he gives me of his
+own affairs, though he obviously makes the best of them, has vexed me.
+
+A melancholy letter from my sister ------ has also harrassed my
+mind--that from my brother would have given me sincere pleasure; but for
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+There is a spirit of independence in his letter, that will please you;
+and you shall see it, when we are once more over the fire together.--I
+think that you would hail him as a brother, with one of your tender
+looks, when your heart not only gives a lustre to your eye, but a dance
+of playfulness, that he would meet with a glow half made up of
+bashfulness, and a desire to please the----where shall I find a word to
+express the relationship which subsists between us?--Shall I ask the
+little twitcher?--But I have dropt half the sentence that was to tell you
+how much he would be inclined to love the man loved by his sister. I have
+been fancying myself sitting between you, ever since I began to write,
+and my heart has leaped at the thought!--You see how I chat to you.
+
+I did not receive your letter till I came home; and I did not expect it,
+for the post came in much later than usual. It was a cordial to me--and I
+wanted one.
+
+Mr. ---- tells me that he has written again and again.--Love him a
+little!--It would be a kind of separation, if you did not love those I
+love.
+
+There was so much considerate tenderness in your epistle to-night, that,
+if it has not made you dearer to me, it has made me forcibly feel how
+very dear you are to me, by charming away half my cares.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IX.
+
+Tuesday Morning [December 31.]
+
+THOUGH I have just sent a letter off, yet, as captain ---- offers to take
+one, I am not willing to let him go without a kind greeting, because
+trifles of this sort, without having any effect on my mind, damp my
+spirits:--and you, with all your struggles to be manly, have some of this
+same sensibility.--Do not bid it begone, for I love to see it striving to
+master your features; besides, these kind of sympathies are the life of
+affection: and why, in cultivating our understandings, should we try to
+dry up these springs of pleasure, which gush out to give a freshness to
+days browned by care!
+
+The books sent to me are such as we may read together; so I shall not
+look into them till you return; when you shall read, whilst I mend my
+stockings.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER X.
+
+Wednesday Night [January 1.]
+
+AS I have been, you tell me, three days without writing, I ought not to
+complain of two: yet, as I expected to receive a letter this afternoon, I
+am hurt; and why should I, by concealing it, affect the heroism I do not
+feel?
+
+I hate commerce. How differently must ------'s head and heart be
+organized from mine! You will tell me, that exertions are necessary: I am
+weary of them! The face of things, public and private, vexes me. The
+"peace" and clemency which seemed to be dawning a few days ago, disappear
+again. "I am fallen," as Milton said, "on evil days;" for I really
+believe that Europe will be in a state of convulsion, during half a
+century at least. Life is but a labour of patience: it is always rolling
+a great stone up a hill; for, before a person can find a resting-place,
+imagining it is lodged, down it comes again, and all the work is to be
+done over anew!
+
+Should I attempt to write any more, I could not change the strain. My
+head aches, and my heart is heavy. The world appears an "unweeded
+garden," where "things rank and vile" flourish best.
+
+If you do not return soon--or, which is no such mighty matter, talk of
+it--I will throw your slippers out at window, and be off--nobody knows
+where.
+
+* * * *
+
+Finding that I was observed, I told the good women, the two Mrs. ----s,
+simply that I was with child: and let them stare! and ------, and ------,
+nay, all the world, may know it for aught I care!--Yet I wish to avoid
+------'s coarse jokes.
+
+Considering the care and anxiety a woman must have about a child before
+it comes into the world, it seems to me, by a _natural right_, to belong
+to her. When men get immersed in the world, they seem to lose all
+sensations, excepting those necessary to continue or produce life!--Are
+these the privileges of reason? Amongst the feathered race, whilst the
+hen keeps the young warm, her mate stays by to cheer her; but it is
+sufficient for man to condescend to get a child, in order to claim it.--A
+man is a tyrant!
+
+You may now tell me, that, if it were not for me, you would be laughing
+away with some honest fellows in L--n. The casual exercise of social
+sympathy would not be sufficient for me--I should not think such an
+heartless life worth preserving.--It is necessary to be in good-humour
+with you, to be pleased with the world.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Thursday Morning.
+
+I WAS very low-spirited last night, ready to quarrel with your cheerful
+temper, which makes absence easy to you.--And, why should I mince the the
+matter? I was offended at your not even mentioning it.--I do not want to
+be loved like a goddess; but I wish to be necessary to you. God bless
+you[27-A]!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XI.
+
+Monday Night.
+
+I HAVE just received your kind and rational letter, and would fain hide
+my face, glowing with shame for my folly.--I would hide it in your bosom,
+if you would again open it to me, and nestle closely till you bade my
+fluttering heart be still, by saying that you forgave me. With eyes
+overflowing with tears, and in the humblest attitude, I intreat you.--Do
+not turn from me, for indeed I love you fondly, and have been very
+wretched, since the night I was so cruelly hurt by thinking that you had
+no confidence in me----
+
+It is time for me to grow more reasonable, a few more of these caprices
+of sensibility would destroy me. I have, in fact, been very much
+indisposed for a few days past, and the notion that I was tormenting, or
+perhaps killing, a poor little animal, about whom I am grown anxious and
+tender, now I feel it alive, made me worse. My bowels have been
+dreadfully disordered, and every thing I ate or drank disagreed with my
+stomach; still I feel intimations of its existence, though they have been
+fainter.
+
+Do you think that the creature goes regularly to sleep? I am ready to ask
+as many questions as Voltaire's Man of Forty Crowns. Ah! do not continue
+to be angry with me! You perceive that I am already smiling through my
+tears--You have lightened my heart, and my frozen spirits are melting
+into playfulness.
+
+Write the moment you receive this. I shall count the minutes. But drop
+not an angry word--I cannot now bear it. Yet, if you think I deserve a
+scolding (it does not admit of a question, I grant), wait till you come
+back--and then, if you are angry one day, I shall be sure of seeing you
+the next.
+
+------ did not write to you, I suppose, because he talked of going to
+H----. Hearing that I was ill, he called very kindly on me, not dreaming
+that it was some words that he incautiously let fall, which rendered me
+so.
+
+God bless you, my love; do not shut your heart against a return of
+tenderness; and, as I now in fancy cling to you, be more than ever my
+support.--Feel but as affectionate when you read this letter, as I did
+writing it, and you will make happy, your
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XII.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+I WILL never, if I am not entirely cured of quarrelling, begin to
+encourage "quick-coming fancies," when we are separated. Yesterday, my
+love, I could not open your letter for some time; and, though it was not
+half as severe as I merited, it threw me into such a fit of trembling, as
+seriously alarmed me. I did not, as you may suppose, care for a little
+pain on my own account; but all the fears which I have had for a few days
+past, returned with fresh force. This morning I am better; will you not
+be glad to hear it? You perceive that sorrow has almost made a child of
+me, and that I want to be soothed to peace.
+
+One thing you mistake in my character, and imagine that to be coldness
+which is just the contrary. For, when I am hurt by the person most dear
+to me, I must let out a whole torrent of emotions, in which tenderness
+would be uppermost, or stifle them altogether; and it appears to me
+almost a duty to stifle them, when I imagine _that I am treated with
+coldness_.
+
+I am afraid that I have vexed you, my own ----. I know the quickness of
+your feelings--and let me, in the sincerity of my heart, assure you,
+there is nothing I would not suffer to make you happy. My own happiness
+wholly depends on you--and, knowing you, when my reason is not clouded, I
+look forward to a rational prospect of as much felicity as the earth
+affords--with a little dash of rapture into the bargain, if you will look
+at me, when we meet again, as you have sometimes greeted, your humbled,
+yet most affectionate
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIII.
+
+Thursday Night.
+
+I HAVE been wishing the time away, my kind love, unable to rest till I
+knew that my penitential letter had reached your hand--and this
+afternoon, when your tender epistle of Tuesday gave such exquisite
+pleasure to your poor sick girl, her heart smote her to think that you
+were still to receive another cold one.--Burn it also, my ----; yet do
+not forget that even those letters were full of love; and I shall ever
+recollect, that you did not wait to be mollified by my penitence, before
+you took me again to your heart.
+
+I have been unwell, and would not, now I am recovering, take a journey,
+because I have been seriously alarmed and angry with myself, dreading
+continually the fatal consequence of my folly.--But, should you think it
+right to remain at H--, I shall find some opportunity, in the course of a
+fortnight, or less perhaps, to come to you, and before then I shall be
+strong again.--Yet do not be uneasy! I am really better, and never took
+such care of myself, as I have done since you restored my peace of mind.
+The girl is come to warm my bed--so I will tenderly say, good night! and
+write a line or two in the morning.
+
+Morning.
+
+I WISH you were here to walk with me this fine morning! yet your absence
+shall not prevent me. I have stayed at home too much; though, when I was
+so dreadfully out of spirits, I was careless of every thing.
+
+I will now sally forth (you will go with me in my heart) and try whether
+this fine bracing air will not give the vigour to the poor babe, it had,
+before I so inconsiderately gave way to the grief that deranged my
+bowels, and gave a turn to my whole system.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *  * * * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIV.
+
+Saturday Morning.
+
+THE two or three letters, which I have written to you lately, my love,
+will serve as an answer to your explanatory one. I cannot but respect
+your motives and conduct. I always respected them; and was only hurt, by
+what seemed to me a want of confidence, and consequently affection.--I
+thought also, that if you were obliged to stay three months at H--, I
+might as well have been with you.--Well! well, what signifies what I
+brooded over--Let us now be friends!
+
+I shall probably receive a letter from you to-day, sealing my pardon--and
+I will be careful not to torment you with my querulous humours, at
+least, till I see you again. Act as circumstances direct, and I will not
+enquire when they will permit you to return, convinced that you will
+hasten to your * * * *, when you have attained (or lost sight of) the
+object of your journey.
+
+What a picture have you sketched of our fire-side! Yes, my love, my fancy
+was instantly at work, and I found my head on your shoulder, whilst my
+eyes were fixed on the little creatures that were clinging about your
+knees. I did not absolutely determine that there should be six--if you
+have not set your heart on this round number.
+
+I am going to dine with Mrs. ----. I have not been to visit her since the
+first day she came to Paris. I wish indeed to be out in the air as much
+as I can; for the exercise I have taken these two or three days past,
+has been of such service to me, that I hope shortly to tell you, that I
+am quite well. I have scarcely slept before last night, and then not
+much.--The two Mrs. ------s have been very anxious and tender.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+I need not desire you to give the colonel a good bottle of wine.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XV.
+
+Sunday Morning.
+
+I WROTE to you yesterday, my ----; but, finding that the colonel is still
+detained (for his passport was forgotten at the office yesterday) I am
+not willing to let so many days elapse without your hearing from me,
+after having talked of illness and apprehensions.
+
+I cannot boast of being quite recovered, yet I am (I must use my
+Yorkshire phrase; for, when my heart is warm, pop come the expressions of
+childhood into my head) so _lightsome_, that I think it will not _go
+badly with me_.--And nothing shall be wanting on my part, I assure you;
+for I am urged on, not only by an enlivened affection for you, but by a
+new-born tenderness that plays cheerly round my dilating heart.
+
+I was therefore, in defiance of cold and dirt, out in the air the greater
+part of yesterday; and, if I get over this evening without a return of
+the fever that has tormented me, I shall talk no more of illness. I have
+promised the little creature, that its mother, who ought to cherish it,
+will not again plague it, and begged it to pardon me; and, since I could
+not hug either it or you to my breast, I have to my heart.--I am afraid
+to read over this prattle--but it is only for your eye.
+
+I have been seriously vexed, to find that, whilst you were harrassed by
+impediments in your undertakings, I was giving you additional
+uneasiness.--If you can make any of your plans answer--it is well, I do
+not think a _little_ money inconvenient; but, should they fail, we will
+struggle cheerfully together--drawn closer by the pinching blasts of
+poverty.
+
+Adieu, my love! Write often to your poor girl, and write long letters;
+for I not only like them for being longer, but because more heart steals
+into them; and I am happy to catch your heart whenever I can.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVI.
+
+Tuesday Morning.
+
+I SEIZE this opportunity to inform you, that I am to set out on Thursday
+with Mr. ------, and hope to tell you soon (on your lips) how glad I
+shall be to see you. I have just got my passport, so I do not foresee any
+impediment to my reaching H----, to bid you good-night next Friday in my
+new apartment--where I am to meet you and love, in spite of care, to
+smile me to sleep--for I have not caught much rest since we parted.
+
+You have, by your tenderness and worth, twisted yourself more artfully
+round my heart, than I supposed possible.--Let me indulge the thought,
+that I have thrown out some tendrils to cling to the elm by which I wish
+to be supported.--This is talking a new language for me!--But, knowing
+that I am not a parasite-plant, I am willing to receive the proofs of
+affection, that every pulse replies to, when I think of being once more
+in the same house with you.--God bless you!
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVII.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+I ONLY send this as an _avant-coureur_, without jack-boots, to tell you,
+that I am again on the wing, and hope to be with you a few hours after
+you receive it. I shall find you well, and composed, I am sure; or, more
+properly speaking, cheerful.--What is the reason that my spirits are not
+as manageable as yours? Yet, now I think of it, I will not allow that
+your temper is even, though I have promised myself, in order to obtain my
+own forgiveness, that I will not ruffle it for a long, long time--I am
+afraid to say never.
+
+Farewell for a moment!--Do not forget that I am driving towards you in
+person! My mind, unfettered, has flown to you long since, or rather has
+never left you.
+
+I am well, and have no apprehension that I shall find the journey too
+fatiguing, when I follow the lead of my heart.--With my face turned to
+H--my spirits will not sink--and my mind has always hitherto enabled my
+body to do whatever I wished.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVIII.
+
+H--, Thursday Morning, March 12.
+
+WE are such creatures of habit, my love, that, though I cannot say I was
+sorry, childishly so, for your going, when I knew that you were to stay
+such a short time, and I had a plan of employment; yet I could not
+sleep.--I turned to your side of the bed, and tried to make the most of
+the comfort of the pillow, which you used to tell me I was churlish
+about; but all would not do.--I took nevertheless my walk before
+breakfast, though the weather was not very inviting--and here I am,
+wishing you a finer day, and seeing you peep over my shoulder, as I
+write, with one of your kindest looks--when your eyes glisten, and a
+suffusion creeps over your relaxing features.
+
+But I do not mean to dally with you this morning--So God bless you! Take
+care of yourself--and sometimes fold to your heart your affectionate
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIX.
+
+DO not call me stupid, for leaving on the table the little bit of paper I
+was to inclose.--This comes of being in love at the fag-end of a letter
+of business.--You know, you say, they will not chime together.--I had got
+you by the fire-side, with the _gigot_ smoking on the board, to lard your
+poor bare ribs--and behold, I closed my letter without taking the paper
+up, that was directly under my eyes!--What had I got in them to render me
+so blind?--I give you leave to answer the question, if you will not
+scold; for I am
+
+Yours most affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XX.
+
+Sunday, August 17.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I have promised ------ to go with him to his country-house, where he is
+now permitted to dine--I, and the little darling, to be sure[47-A]--whom
+I cannot help kissing with more fondness, since you left us. I think I
+shall enjoy the fine prospect, and that it will rather enliven, than
+satiate my imagination.
+
+I have called on Mrs. ------. She has the manners of a gentlewoman, with
+a dash of the easy French coquetry, which renders her _piquante_.--But
+_Monsieur_ her husband, whom nature never dreamed of casting in either
+the mould of a gentleman or lover, makes but an aukward figure in the
+foreground of the picture.
+
+The H----s are very ugly, without doubt--and the house smelt of commerce
+from top to toe--so that his abortive attempt to display taste, only
+proved it to be one of the things not to be bought with gold. I was in a
+room a moment alone, and my attention was attracted by the _pendule_--A
+nymph was offering up her vows before a smoking altar, to a fat-bottomed
+Cupid (saving your presence), who was kicking his heels in the air.--Ah!
+kick on, thought I; for the demon of traffic will ever fright away the
+loves and graces, that streak with the rosy beams of infant fancy the
+_sombre_ day of life--whilst the imagination, not allowing us to see
+things as they are, enables us to catch a hasty draught of the running
+stream of delight, the thirst for which seems to be given only to
+tantalize us.
+
+But I am philosophizing; nay, perhaps you will call me severe, and bid me
+let the square-headed money-getters alone.--Peace to them! though none of
+the social sprites (and there are not a few of different descriptions,
+who sport about the various inlets to my heart) gave me a twitch to
+restrain my pen.
+
+I have been writing on, expecting poor ------ to come; for, when I began,
+I merely thought of business; and, as this is the idea that most
+naturally associates with your image, I wonder I stumbled on any other.
+
+Yet, as common life, in my opinion, is scarcely worth having, even with a
+_gigot_ every day, and a pudding added thereunto, I will allow you to
+cultivate my judgment, if you will permit me to keep alive the sentiments
+in your heart, which may be termed romantic, because, the offspring of
+the senses and the imagination, they resemble the mother more than the
+father[50-A], when they produce the suffusion I admire.--In spite of icy
+age, I hope still to see it, if you have not determined only to eat and
+drink, and be stupidly useful to the stupid--
+
+Yours
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXI.
+
+H--, August 19, Tuesday.
+
+I RECEIVED both your letters to-day--I had reckoned on hearing from you
+yesterday, therefore was disappointed, though I imputed your silence to
+the right cause. I intended answering your kind letter immediately, that
+you might have felt the pleasure it gave me; but ------ came in, and
+some other things interrupted me; so that the fine vapour has
+evaporated--yet, leaving a sweet scent behind, I have only to tell you,
+what is sufficiently obvious, that the earnest desire I have shown to
+keep my place, or gain more ground in your heart, is a sure proof how
+necessary your affection is to my happiness.--Still I do not think it
+false delicacy, or foolish pride, to wish that your attention to my
+happiness should arise _as much_ from love, which is always rather a
+selfish passion, as reason--that is, I want you to promote my felicity,
+by seeking your own.--For, whatever pleasure it may give me to discover
+your generosity of soul, I would not be dependent for your affection on
+the very quality I most admire. No; there are qualities in your heart,
+which demand my affection; but, unless the attachment appears to me
+clearly mutual, I shall labour only to esteem your character, instead of
+cherishing a tenderness for your person.
+
+I write in a hurry, because the little one, who has been sleeping a long
+time, begins to call for me. Poor thing! when I am sad, I lament that all
+my affections grow on me, till they become too strong for my peace,
+though they all afford me snatches of exquisite enjoyment--This for our
+little girl was at first very reasonable--more the effect of reason, a
+sense of duty, than feeling--now, she has got into my heart and
+imagination, and when I walk out without her, her little figure is ever
+dancing before me.
+
+You too have somehow clung round my heart--I found I could not eat my
+dinner in the great room--and, when I took up the large knife to carve
+for myself, tears rushed into my eyes.--Do not however suppose that I am
+melancholy--for, when you are from me, I not only wonder how I can find
+fault with you--but how I can doubt your affection.
+
+I will not mix any comments on the inclosed (it roused my indignation)
+with the effusion of tenderness, with which I assure you, that you are
+the friend of my bosom, and the prop of my heart.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXII.
+
+H--, August 20.
+
+I WANT to know what steps you have taken respecting ----. Knavery always
+rouses my indignation--I should be gratified to hear that the law had
+chastised ------ severely; but I do not wish you to see him, because the
+business does not now admit of peaceful discussion, and I do not exactly
+know how you would express your contempt.
+
+Pray ask some questions about Tallien--I am still pleased with the
+dignity of his conduct.--The other day, in the cause of humanity, he made
+use of a degree of address, which I admire--and mean to point out to
+you, as one of the few instances of address which do credit to the
+abilities of the man, without taking away from that confidence in his
+openness of heart, which is the true basis of both public and private
+friendship.
+
+Do not suppose that I mean to allude to a little reserve of temper in
+you, of which I have sometimes complained! You have been used to a
+cunning woman, and you almost look for cunning--Nay, in _managing_ my
+happiness, you now and then wounded my sensibility, concealing yourself,
+till honest sympathy, giving you to me without disguise, lets me look
+into a heart, which my half-broken one wishes to creep into, to be
+revived and cherished.----You have frankness of heart, but not often
+exactly that overflowing (_epanchement de coeur_), which becoming almost
+childish, appears a weakness only to the weak.
+
+But I have left poor Tallien. I wanted you to enquire likewise whether,
+as a member declared in the convention, Robespierre really maintained a
+_number_ of mistresses.--Should it prove so, I suspect that they rather
+flattered his vanity than his senses.
+
+Here is a chatting, desultory epistle! But do not suppose that I mean to
+close it without mentioning the little damsel--who has been almost
+springing out of my arm--she certainly looks very like you--but I do not
+love her the less for that, whether I am angry or pleased with you.--
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXIII[58-A].
+
+September 22.
+
+I HAVE just written two letters, that are going by other conveyances, and
+which I reckon on your receiving long before this. I therefore merely
+write, because I know I should be disappointed at seeing any one who had
+left you, if you did not send a letter, were it ever so short, to tell me
+why you did not write a longer--and you will want to be told, over and
+over again, that our little Hercules is quite recovered.
+
+Besides looking at me, there are three other things, which delight
+her--to ride in a coach, to look at a scarlet waistcoat, and hear loud
+music--yesterday, at the _fete_, she enjoyed the two latter; but, to
+honour J. J. Rousseau, I intend to give her a sash, the first she has
+ever had round her--and why not?--for I have always been half in love
+with him.
+
+Well, this you will say is trifling--shall I talk about alum or soap?
+There is nothing picturesque in your present pursuits; my imagination
+then rather chuses to ramble back to the barrier with you, or to see you
+coming to meet me, and my basket of grapes.--With what pleasure do I
+recollect your looks and words, when I have been sitting on the window,
+regarding the waving corn!
+
+Believe me, sage sir, you have not sufficient respect for the
+imagination--I could prove to you in a trice that it is the mother of
+sentiment, the great distinction of our nature, the only purifier of the
+passions--animals have a portion of reason, and equal, if not more
+exquisite, senses; but no trace of imagination, or her offspring taste,
+appears in any of their actions. The impulse of the senses, passions, if
+you will, and the conclusions of reason, draw men together; but the
+imagination is the true fire, stolen from heaven, to animate this cold
+creature of clay, producing all those fine sympathies that lead to
+rapture, rendering men social by expanding their hearts, instead of
+leaving them leisure to calculate how many comforts society affords.
+
+If you call these observations romantic, a phrase in this place which
+would be tantamount to nonsensical, I shall be apt to retort, that you
+are embruted by trade, and the vulgar enjoyments of life--Bring me then
+back your barrier-face, or you shall have nothing to say to my
+barrier-girl; and I shall fly from you, to cherish the remembrances that
+will ever be dear to me; for I am yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXIV.
+
+Evening, Sept. 23.
+
+I HAVE been playing and laughing with the little girl so long, that I
+cannot take up my pen to address you without emotion. Pressing her to my
+bosom, she looked so like you (_entre nous_, your best looks, for I do
+not admire your commercial face) every nerve seemed to vibrate to the
+touch, and I began to think that there was something in the assertion of
+man and wife being one--for you seemed to pervade my whole frame,
+quickening the beat of my heart, and lending me the sympathetic tears you
+excited.
+
+Have I any thing more to say to you? No; not for the present--the rest is
+all flown away; and, indulging tenderness for you, I cannot now complain
+of some people here, who have ruffled my temper for two or three days
+past.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Morning.
+
+YESTERDAY B---- sent to me for my packet of letters. He called on me
+before; and I like him better than I did--that is, I have the same
+opinion of his understanding, but I think with you, he has more
+tenderness and real delicacy of feeling with respect to women, than are
+commonly to be met with. His manner too of speaking of his little girl,
+about the age of mine, interested me. I gave him a letter for my sister,
+and requested him to see her.
+
+I have been interrupted. Mr. ----I suppose will write about business.
+Public affairs I do not descant on, except to tell you that they write
+now with great freedom and truth, and this liberty of the press will
+overthrow the Jacobins, I plainly perceive.
+
+I hope you take care of your health. I have got a habit of restlessness
+at night, which arises, I believe, from activity of mind; for, when I am
+alone, that is, not near one to whom I can open my heart, I sink into
+reveries and trains of thinking, which agitate and fatigue me.
+
+This is my third letter; when am I to hear from you? I need not tell you,
+I suppose, that I am now writing with somebody in the room with me, and
+---- is waiting to carry this to Mr. ----'s. I will then kiss the girl
+for you, and bid you adieu.
+
+I desired you, in one of my other letters, to bring back to me your
+barrier-face--or that you should not be loved by my barrier-girl. I know
+that you will love her more and more, for she is a little affectionate,
+intelligent creature, with as much vivacity, I should think, as you could
+wish for.
+
+I was going to tell you of two or three things which displease me here;
+but they are not of sufficient consequence to interrupt pleasing
+sensations. I have received a letter from Mr. ----. I want you to bring
+----with you. Madame S---- is by me, reading a German translation of your
+letters--she desires me to give her love to you, on account of what you
+say of the negroes.
+
+Yours most affectionately,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXV.
+
+Paris, Sept. 28.
+
+I HAVE written to you three or four letters; but different causes have
+prevented my sending them by the persons who promised to take or forward
+them. The inclosed is one I wrote to go by B----; yet, finding that he
+will not arrive, before I hope, and believe, you will have set out on
+your return, I inclose it to you, and shall give it in charge to ----, as
+Mr. ---- is detained, to whom I also gave a letter.
+
+I cannot help being anxious to hear from you; but I shall not harrass you
+with accounts of inquietudes, or of cares that arise from peculiar
+circumstances.--I have had so many little plagues here, that I have
+almost lamented that I left H----. ----, who is at best a most helpless
+creature, is now, on account of her pregnancy, more trouble than use to
+me, so that I still continue to be almost a slave to the child.--She
+indeed rewards me, for she is a sweet little creature; for, setting aside
+a mother's fondness (which, by the bye, is growing on me, her little
+intelligent smiles sinking into my heart), she has an astonishing degree
+of sensibility and observation. The other day by B----'s child, a fine
+one, she looked like a little sprite.--She is all life and motion, and
+her eyes are not the eyes of a fool--I will swear.
+
+I slept at St. Germain's, in the very room (if you have not forgot) in
+which you pressed me very tenderly to your heart.--I did not forget to
+fold my darling to mine, with sensations that are almost too sacred to
+be alluded to.
+
+Adieu, my love! Take care of yourself, if you wish to be the protector of
+your child, and the comfort of her mother.
+
+I have received, for you, letters from --------. I want to hear how that
+affair finishes, though I do not know whether I have most contempt for
+his folly or knavery.
+
+Your own
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXVI.
+
+October 1.
+
+IT is a heartless task to write letters, without knowing whether they
+will ever reach you.--I have given two to ----, who has been a-going,
+a-going, every day, for a week past; and three others, which were written
+in a low-spirited strain, a little querulous or so, I have not been able
+to forward by the opportunities that were mentioned to me. _Tant mieux!_
+you will say, and I will not say nay; for I should be sorry that the
+contents of a letter, when you are so far away, should damp the pleasure
+that the sight of it would afford--judging of your feelings by my own. I
+just now stumbled on one of the kind letters, which you wrote during your
+last absence. You are then a dear affectionate creature, and I will not
+plague you. The letter which you chance to receive, when the absence is
+so long, ought to bring only tears of tenderness, without any bitter
+alloy, into your eyes.
+
+After your return I hope indeed, that you will not be so immersed in
+business, as during the last three or four months past--for even money,
+taking into the account all the future comforts it is to procure, may be
+gained at too dear a rate, if painful impressions are left on the
+mind.--These impressions were much more lively, soon after you went away,
+than at present--for a thousand tender recollections efface the
+melancholy traces they left on my mind--and every emotion is on the same
+side as my reason, which always was on yours.--Separated, it would be
+almost impious to dwell on real or imaginary imperfections of
+character.--I feel that I love you; and, if I cannot be happy with you, I
+will seek it no where else.
+
+My little darling grows every day more dear to me--and she often has a
+kiss, when we are alone together, which I give her for you, with all my
+heart.
+
+I have been interrupted--and must send off my letter. The liberty of the
+press will produce a great effect here--the _cry of blood will not be
+vain_!--Some more monsters will perish--and the Jacobins are
+conquered.--Yet I almost fear the last slap of the tail of the beast.
+
+I have had several trifling teazing inconveniencies here, which I shall
+not now trouble you with a detail of.--I am sending ---- back; her
+pregnancy rendered her useless. The girl I have got has more vivacity,
+which is better for the child.
+
+I long to hear from you.--Bring a copy of ---- and ---- with you.
+
+---- is still here: he is a lost man.--He really loves his wife, and is
+anxious about his children; but his indiscriminate hospitality and social
+feelings have given him an inveterate habit of drinking, that destroys
+his health, as well as renders his person disgusting.--If his wife had
+more sense, or delicacy, she might restrain him: as it is, nothing will
+save him.
+
+Yours most truly and affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXVII.
+
+October 26.
+
+MY dear love, I began to wish so earnestly to hear from you, that the
+sight of your letters occasioned such pleasurable emotions, I was obliged
+to throw them aside till the little girl and I were alone together; and
+this said little girl, our darling, is become a most intelligent little
+creature, and as gay as a lark, and that in the morning too, which I do
+not find quite so convenient. I once told you, that the sensations before
+she was born, and when she is sucking, were pleasant; but they do not
+deserve to be compared to the emotions I feel, when she stops to smile
+upon me, or laughs outright on meeting me unexpectedly in the street, or
+after a short absence. She has now the advantage of having two good
+nurses, and I am at present able to discharge my duty to her, without
+being the slave of it.
+
+I have therefore employed and amused myself since I got rid of ----, and
+am making a progress in the language amongst other things. I have also
+made some new acquaintance. I have almost _charmed_ a judge of the
+tribunal, R----, who, though I should not have thought it possible, has
+humanity, if not _beaucoup d'esprit_. But let me tell you, if you do not
+make haste back, I shall be half in love with the author of the
+_Marseillaise_, who is a handsome man, a little too broad-faced or so,
+and plays sweetly on the violin.
+
+What do you say to this threat?--why, _entre nous_, I like to give way to
+a sprightly vein, when writing to you, that is, when I am pleased with
+you. "The devil," you know, is proverbially said to be "in a good humour,
+when he is pleased." Will you not then be a good boy, and come back
+quickly to play with your girls? but I shall not allow you to love the
+new-comer best.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+My heart longs for your return, my love, and only looks for, and seeks
+happiness with you; yet do not imagine that I childishly wish you to come
+back, before you have arranged things in such a manner, that it will not
+be necessary for you to leave us soon again; or to make exertions which
+injure your constitution.
+
+Yours most truly and tenderly
+
+* * * *
+
+P.S. "You would oblige me by delivering the inclosed to Mr. ----, and
+pray call for an answer.--It is for a person uncomfortably situated.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXVIII.
+
+Dec. 26.
+
+I HAVE been, my love, for some days tormented by fears, that I would not
+allow to assume a form--I had been expecting you daily--and I heard that
+many vessels had been driven on shore during the late gale.--Well, I now
+see your letter--and find that you are safe; I will not regret then that
+your exertions have hitherto been so unavailing.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Be that as it may, return to me when you have arranged the other matters,
+which ---- has been crowding on you. I want to be sure that you are
+safe--and not separated from me by a sea that must be passed. For,
+feeling that I am happier than I ever was, do you wonder at my sometimes
+dreading that fate has not done persecuting me? Come to me, my dearest
+friend, husband, father of my child!--All these fond ties glow at my
+heart at this moment, and dim my eyes.--With you an independence is
+desirable; and it is always within our reach, if affluence escapes
+us--without you the world again appears empty to me. But I am recurring
+to some of the melancholy thoughts that have flitted across my mind for
+some days past, and haunted my dreams.
+
+My little darling is indeed a sweet child; and I am sorry that you are
+not here, to see her little mind unfold itself. You talk of "dalliance;"
+but certainly no lover was ever more attached to his mistress, than she
+is to me. Her eyes follow me every where, and by affection I have the
+most despotic power over her. She is all vivacity or softness--yes; I
+love her more than I thought I should. When I have been hurt at your
+stay, I have embraced her as my only comfort--when pleased with you, for
+looking and laughing like you; nay, I cannot, I find, long be angry with
+you, whilst I am kissing her for resembling you. But there would be no
+end to these details. Fold us both to your heart; for I am truly and
+affectionately
+
+Yours
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXIX.
+
+December 28.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I do, my love, indeed sincerely sympathize with you in all your
+disappointments.--Yet, knowing that you are well, and think of me with
+affection, I only lament other disappointments, because I am sorry that
+you should thus exert yourself in vain, and that you are kept from me.
+
+------, I know, urges you to stay, and is continually branching out into
+new projects, because he has the idle desire to amass a large fortune,
+rather an immense one, merely to have the credit of having made it. But
+we who are governed by other motives, ought not to be led on by him. When
+we meet, we will discuss this subject--You will listen to reason, and it
+has probably occurred to you, that it will be better, in future, to
+pursue some sober plan, which may demand more time, and still enable you
+to arrive at the same end. It appears to me absurd to waste life in
+preparing to live.
+
+Would it not now be possible to arrange your business in such a manner
+as to avoid the inquietudes, of which I have had my share since your
+departure? Is it not possible to enter into business, as an employment
+necessary to keep the faculties awake, and (to sink a little in the
+expressions) the pot boiling, without suffering what must ever be
+considered as a secondary object, to engross the mind, and drive
+sentiment and affection out of the heart?
+
+I am in a hurry to give this letter to the person who has promised to
+forward it with ------'s. I wish then to counteract, in some measure,
+what he has doubtless recommended most warmly.
+
+Stay, my friend, whilst it is _absolutely_ necessary.--I will give you no
+tenderer name, though it glows at my heart, unless you come the moment
+the settling the _present_ objects permit.--_I do not consent_ to your
+taking any other journey--or the little woman and I will be off, the Lord
+knows where. But, as I had rather owe every thing to your affection, and,
+I may add, to your reason, (for this immoderate desire of wealth, which
+makes ------ so eager to have you remain, is contrary to your principles
+of action), I will not importune you.--I will only tell you, that I long
+to see you--and, being at peace with you, I shall be hurt, rather than
+made angry, by delays.--Having suffered so much in life, do not be
+surprised if I sometimes, when left to myself, grow gloomy, and suppose
+that it was all a dream, and that my happiness is not to last. I say
+happiness, because remembrance retrenches all the dark shades of the
+picture.
+
+My little one begins to show her teeth, and use her legs--She wants you
+to bear your part in the nursing business, for I am fatigued with dancing
+her, and yet she is not satisfied--she wants you to thank her mother for
+taking such care of her, as you only can.
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXX.
+
+December 29.
+
+THOUGH I suppose you have later intelligence, yet, as ------ has just
+informed me that he has an opportunity of sending immediately to you, I
+take advantage of it to inclose you
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+How I hate this crooked business! This intercourse with the world, which
+obliges one to see the worst side of human nature! Why cannot you be
+content with the object you had first in view, when you entered into this
+wearisome labyrinth?--I know very well that you have imperceptibly been
+drawn on; yet why does one project, successful or abortive, only give
+place to two others? Is it not sufficient to avoid poverty?--I am
+contented to do my part; and, even here, sufficient to escape from
+wretchedness is not difficult to obtain. And, let me tell you, I have my
+project also--and, if you do not soon return, the little girl and I will
+take care of ourselves; we will not accept any of your cold
+kindness--your distant civilities--no; not we.
+
+This is but half jesting, for I am really tormented by the desire which
+------ manifests to have you remain where you are.--Yet why do I talk to
+you?--If he can persuade you--let him!--for, if you are not happier with
+me, and your own wishes do not make you throw aside these eternal
+projects, I am above using any arguments, though reason as well as
+affection seems to offer them--if our affection be mutual, they will
+occur to you--and you will act accordingly.
+
+Since my arrival here, I have found the German lady, of whom you have
+heard me speak. Her first child died in the month; but she has another,
+about the age of my ------, a fine little creature. They are still but
+contriving to live----earning their daily bread--yet, though they are
+but just above poverty, I envy them.--She is a tender, affectionate
+mother--fatigued even by her attention.--However she has an affectionate
+husband in her turn, to render her care light, and to share her pleasure.
+
+I will own to you that, feeling extreme tenderness for my little girl, I
+grow sad very often when I am playing with her, that you are not here, to
+observe with me how her mind unfolds, and her little heart becomes
+attached!--These appear to me to be true pleasures--and still you suffer
+them to escape you, in search of what we may never enjoy.--It is your own
+maxim to "live in the present moment."--_If you do_--stay, for God's
+sake; but tell me the truth--if not, tell me when I may expect to see
+you, and let me not be always vainly looking for you, till I grow sick at
+heart.
+
+Adieu! I am a little hurt.--I must take my darling to my bosom to comfort
+me.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXI.
+
+December 30.
+
+SHOULD you receive three or four of the letters at once which I have
+written lately, do not think of Sir John Brute, for I do not mean to wife
+you. I only take advantage of every occasion, that one out of three of my
+epistles may reach your hands, and inform you that I am not of ------'s
+opinion, who talks till he makes me angry, of the necessity of your
+staying two or three months longer. I do not like this life of continual
+inquietude--and, _entre nous_, I am determined to try to earn some money
+here myself, in order to convince you that, if you chuse to run about the
+world to get a fortune, it is for yourself--for the little girl and I
+will live without your assistance, unless you are with us. I may be
+termed proud--Be it so--but I will never abandon certain principles of
+action.
+
+The common run of men have such an ignoble way of thinking, that, if they
+debauch their hearts, and prostitute their persons, following perhaps a
+gust of inebriation, they suppose the wife, slave rather, whom they
+maintain, has no right to complain, and ought to receive the sultan,
+whenever he deigns to return, with open arms, though his have been
+polluted by half an hundred promiscuous amours during his absence.
+
+I consider fidelity and constancy as two distinct things; yet the former
+is necessary, to give life to the other--and such a degree of respect do
+I think due to myself, that, if only probity, which is a good thing in
+its place, brings you back, never return!--for, if a wandering of the
+heart, or even a caprice of the imagination detains you--there is an end
+of all my hopes of happiness--I could not forgive it, if I would.
+
+I have gotten into a melancholy mood, you perceive. You know my opinion
+of men in general; you know that I think them systematic tyrants, and
+that it is the rarest thing in the world, to meet with a man with
+sufficient delicacy of feeling to govern desire. When I am thus sad, I
+lament that my little darling, fondly as I doat on her, is a girl.--I am
+sorry to have a tie to a world that for me is ever sown with thorns.
+
+You will call this an ill-humoured letter, when, in fact, it is the
+strongest proof of affection I can give, to dread to lose you. ------ has
+taken such pains to convince me that you must and ought to stay, that it
+has inconceivably depressed my spirits--You have always known my
+opinion--I have ever declared, that two people, who mean to live
+together, ought not to be long separated.--If certain things are more
+necessary to you than me--search for them--Say but one word, and you
+shall never hear of me more.--If not--for God's sake, let us struggle
+with poverty--with any evil, but these continual inquietudes of business,
+which I have been told were to last but a few months, though every day
+the end appears more distant! This is the first letter in this strain
+that I have determined to forward to you; the rest lie by, because I was
+unwilling to give you pain, and I should not now write, if I did not
+think that there would be no conclusion to the schemes, which demand, as
+I am told, your presence.
+
+* * * *[91-A]
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXII.
+
+January 9.
+
+I JUST now received one of your hasty _notes_; for business so entirely
+occupies you, that you have not time, or sufficient command of thought,
+to write letters. Beware! you seem to be got into a whirl of projects and
+schemes, which are drawing you into a gulph, that, if it do not absorb
+your happiness, will infallibly destroy mine.
+
+Fatigued during my youth by the most arduous struggles, not only to
+obtain independence, but to render myself useful, not merely pleasure,
+for which I had the most lively taste, I mean the simple pleasures that
+flow from passion and affection, escaped me, but the most melancholy
+views of life were impressed by a disappointed heart on my mind. Since I
+knew you, I have been endeavouring to go back to my former nature, and
+have allowed some time to glide away, winged with the delight which only
+spontaneous enjoyment can give.--Why have you so soon dissolved the
+charm?
+
+I am really unable to bear the continual inquietude which your and
+------'s never-ending plans produce. This you may term want of
+firmness--but you are mistaken--I have still sufficient firmness to
+pursue my principle of action. The present misery, I cannot find a softer
+word to do justice to my feelings, appears to me unnecessary--and
+therefore I have not firmness to support it as you may think I ought. I
+should have been content, and still wish, to retire with you to a
+farm--My God! any thing, but these continual anxieties--any thing but
+commerce, which debases the mind, and roots out affection from the heart.
+
+I do not mean to complain of subordinate inconveniences----yet I will
+simply observe, that, led to expect you every week, I did not make the
+arrangements required by the present circumstances, to procure the
+necessaries of life. In order to have them, a servant, for that purpose
+only, is indispensible--The want of wood, has made me catch the most
+violent cold I ever had; and my head is so disturbed by continual
+coughing, that I am unable to write without stopping frequently to
+recollect myself.--This however is one of the common evils which must be
+borne with----bodily pain does not touch the heart, though it fatigues
+the spirits.
+
+Still as you talk of your return, even in February, doubtingly, I have
+determined, the moment the weather changes, to wean my child.--It is too
+soon for her to begin to divide sorrow!--And as one has well said,
+"despair is a freeman," we will go and seek our fortune together.
+
+This is not a caprice of the moment--for your absence has given new
+weight to some conclusions, that I was very reluctantly forming before
+you left me.--I do not chuse to be a secondary object.--If your feelings
+were in unison with mine, you would not sacrifice so much to visionary
+prospects of future advantage.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXIII.
+
+Jan. 15.
+
+I WAS just going to begin my letter with the fag end of a song, which
+would only have told you, what I may as well say simply, that it is
+pleasant to forgive those we love. I have received your two letters,
+dated the 26th and 28th of December, and my anger died away. You can
+scarcely conceive the effect some of your letters have produced on me.
+After longing to hear from you during a tedious interval of suspense, I
+have seen a superscription written by you.--Promising myself pleasure,
+and feeling emotion, I have laid it by me, till the person who brought
+it, left the room--when, behold! on opening it, I have found only half a
+dozen hasty lines, that have damped all the rising affection of my soul.
+
+Well, now for business--
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+My animal is well; I have not yet taught her to eat, but nature is doing
+the business. I gave her a crust to assist the cutting of her teeth; and
+now she has two, she makes good use of them to gnaw a crust, biscuit, &c.
+You would laugh to see her; she is just like a little squirrel; she will
+guard a crust for two hours; and, after fixing her eye on an object for
+some time, dart on it with an aim as sure as a bird of prey--nothing can
+equal her life and spirits. I suffer from a cold; but it does not affect
+her. Adieu! do not forget to love us--and come soon to tell us that you
+do.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXIV.
+
+Jan. 30.
+
+FROM the purport of your last letters, I would suppose that this will
+scarcely reach you; and I have already written so many letters, that you
+have either not received, or neglected to acknowledge, I do not find it
+pleasant, or rather I have no inclination, to go over the same ground
+again. If you have received them, and are still detained by new projects,
+it is useless for me to say any more on the subject. I have done with it
+for ever--yet I ought to remind you that your pecuniary interest suffers
+by your absence.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+For my part, my head is turned giddy, by only hearing of plans to make
+money, and my contemptuous feelings have sometimes burst out. I therefore
+was glad that a violent cold gave me a pretext to stay at home, lest I
+should have uttered unseasonable truths.
+
+My child is well, and the spring will perhaps restore me to myself.--I
+have endured many inconveniences this winter, which should I be ashamed
+to mention, if they had been unavoidable. "The secondary pleasures of
+life," you say, "are very necessary to my comfort:" it may be so; but I
+have ever considered them as secondary. If therefore you accuse me of
+wanting the resolution necessary to bear the _common_[100-A] evils of
+life; I should answer, that I have not fashioned my mind to sustain them,
+because I would avoid them, cost what it would----
+
+Adieu!
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXV.
+
+February 9.
+
+THE melancholy presentiment has for some time hung on my spirits, that we
+were parted for ever; and the letters I received this day, by Mr. ----,
+convince me that it was not without foundation. You allude to some other
+letters, which I suppose have miscarried; for most of those I have got,
+were only a few hasty lines, calculated to wound the tenderness the sight
+of the superscriptions excited.
+
+I mean not however to complain; yet so many feelings are struggling for
+utterance, and agitating a heart almost bursting with anguish, that I
+find it very difficult to write with any degree of coherence.
+
+You left me indisposed, though you have taken no notice of it; and the
+most fatiguing journey I ever had, contributed to continue it. However, I
+recovered my health; but a neglected cold, and continual inquietude
+during the last two months, have reduced me to a state of weakness I
+never before experienced. Those who did not know that the canker-worm was
+at work at the core, cautioned me about suckling my child too long.--God
+preserve this poor child, and render her happier than her mother!
+
+But I am wandering from my subject: indeed my head turns giddy, when I
+think that all the confidence I have had in the affection of others is
+come to this.
+
+I did not expect this blow from you. I have done my duty to you and my
+child; and if I am not to have any return of affection to reward me, I
+have the sad consolation of knowing that I deserved a better fate. My
+soul is weary--I am sick at heart; and, but for this little darling, I
+would cease to care about a life, which is now stripped of every charm.
+
+You see how stupid I am, uttering declamation, when I meant simply to
+tell you, that I consider your requesting me to come to you, as merely
+dictated by honour.--Indeed, I scarcely understand you.--You request me
+to come, and then tell me, that you have not given up all thoughts of
+returning to this place.
+
+When I determined to live with you, I was only governed by affection.--I
+would share poverty with you, but I turn with affright from the sea of
+trouble on which you are entering.--I have certain principles of action:
+I know what I look for to found my happiness on.--It is not money.--With
+you I wished for sufficient to procure the comforts of life--as it is,
+less will do.--I can still exert myself to obtain the necessaries of life
+for my child, and she does not want more at present.--I have two or three
+plans in my head to earn our subsistence; for do not suppose that,
+neglected by you, I will lie under obligations of a pecuniary kind to
+you!--No; I would sooner submit to menial service.--I wanted the support
+of your affection--that gone, all is over!--I did not think, when I
+complained of ----'s contemptible avidity to accumulate money, that he
+would have dragged you into his schemes.
+
+I cannot write.--I inclose a fragment of a letter, written soon after
+your departure, and another which tenderness made me keep back when it
+was written.--You will see then the sentiments of a calmer, though not a
+more determined, moment.--Do not insult me by saying, that "our being
+together is paramount to every other consideration!" Were it, you would
+not be running after a bubble, at the expence of my peace of mind.
+
+Perhaps this is the last letter you will ever receive from me.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXVI.
+
+Feb. 10.
+
+YOU talk of "permanent views and future comfort"--not for me, for I am
+dead to hope. The inquietudes of the last winter have finished the
+business, and my heart is not only broken, but my constitution destroyed.
+I conceive myself in a galloping consumption, and the continual anxiety I
+feel at the thought of leaving my child, feeds the fever that nightly
+devours me. It is on her account that I again write to you, to conjure
+you, by all that you hold sacred, to leave her here with the German lady
+you may have heard me mention! She has a child of the same age, and they
+may be brought up together, as I wish her to be brought up. I shall
+write more fully on the subject. To facilitate this, I shall give up my
+present lodgings, and go into the same house. I can live much cheaper
+there, which is now become an object. I have had 3000 livres from ----,
+and I shall take one more, to pay my servant's wages, &c. and then I
+shall endeavour to procure what I want by my own exertions. I shall
+entirely give up the acquaintance of the Americans.
+
+---- and I have not been on good terms a long time. Yesterday he very
+unmanlily exulted over me, on account of your determination to stay. I
+had provoked it, it is true, by some asperities against commerce, which
+have dropped from me, when we have argued about the propriety of your
+remaining where you are; and it is no matter, I have drunk too deep of
+the bitter cup to care about trifles.
+
+When you first entered into these plans, you bounded your views to the
+gaining of a thousand pounds. It was sufficient to have procured a farm
+in America, which would have been an independence. You find now that you
+did not know yourself, and that a certain situation in life is more
+necessary to you than you imagined--more necessary than an uncorrupted
+heart--For a year or two, you may procure yourself what you call
+pleasure; eating, drinking, and women; but, in the solitude of declining
+life, I shall be remembered with regret--I was going to say with remorse,
+but checked my pen.
+
+As I have never concealed the nature of my connection with you, your
+reputation will not suffer. I shall never have a confident: I am content
+with the approbation of my own mind; and, if there be a searcher of
+hearts, mine will not be despised. Reading what you have written relative
+to the desertion of women, I have often wondered how theory and practice
+could be so different, till I recollected, that the sentiments of
+passion, and the resolves of reason, are very distinct. As to my sisters,
+as you are so continually hurried with business, you need not write to
+them--I shall, when my mind is calmer. God bless you! Adieu!
+
+* * * *
+
+This has been such a period of barbarity and misery, I ought not to
+complain of having my share. I wish one moment that I had never heard of
+the cruelties that have been practised here, and the next envy the
+mothers who have been killed with their children. Surely I had suffered
+enough in life, not to be cursed with a fondness, that burns up the vital
+stream I am imparting. You will think me mad: I would I were so, that I
+could forget my misery--so that my head or heart would be still.----
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXVII.
+
+Feb. 19.
+
+WHEN I first received your letter, putting off your return to an
+indefinite time, I felt so hurt, that I know not what I wrote. I am now
+calmer, though it was not the kind of wound over which time has the
+quickest effect; on the contrary, the more I think, the sadder I grow.
+Society fatigues me inexpressibly--So much so, that finding fault with
+every one, I have only reason enough, to discover that the fault is in
+myself. My child alone interests me, and, but for her, I should not take
+any pains to recover my health.
+
+As it is, I shall wean her, and try if by that step (to which I feel a
+repugnance, for it is my only solace) I can get rid of my cough.
+Physicians talk much of the danger attending any complaint on the lungs,
+after a woman has suckled for some months. They lay a stress also on the
+necessity of keeping the mind tranquil--and, my God! how has mine been
+harrassed! But whilst the caprices of other women are gratified, "the
+wind of heaven not suffered to visit them too rudely," I have not found
+a guardian angel, in heaven or on earth, to ward off sorrow or care from
+my bosom.
+
+What sacrifices have you not made for a woman you did not respect!--But I
+will not go over this ground--I want to tell you that I do not understand
+you. You say that you have not given up all thoughts of returning
+here--and I know that it will be necessary--nay, is. I cannot explain
+myself; but if you have not lost your memory, you will easily divine my
+meaning. What! is our life then only to be made up of separations? and am
+I only to return to a country, that has not merely lost all charms for
+me, but for which I feel a repugnance that almost amounts to horror, only
+to be left there a prey to it!
+
+Why is it so necessary that I should return?--brought up here, my girl
+would be freer. Indeed, expecting you to join us, I had formed some plans
+of usefulness that have now vanished with my hopes of happiness.
+
+In the bitterness of my heart, I could complain with reason, that I am
+left here dependent on a man, whose avidity to acquire a fortune has
+rendered him callous to every sentiment connected with social or
+affectionate emotions.--With a brutal insensibility, he cannot help
+displaying the pleasure your determination to stay gives him, in spite of
+the effect it is visible it has had on me.
+
+Till I can earn money, I shall endeavour to borrow some, for I want to
+avoid asking him continually for the sum necessary to maintain me.--Do
+not mistake me, I have never been refused.--Yet I have gone half a dozen
+times to the house to ask for it, and come away without speaking----you
+must guess why--Besides, I wish to avoid hearing of the eternal projects
+to which you have sacrificed my peace--not remembering--but I will be
+silent for ever.----
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXVIII.
+
+April 7.
+
+HERE I am at H----, on the wing towards you, and I write now, only to
+tell you, that you may expect me in the course of three or four days;
+for I shall not attempt to give vent to the different emotions which
+agitate my heart--You may term a feeling, which appears to me to be a
+degree of delicacy that naturally arises from sensibility, pride--Still I
+cannot indulge the very affectionate tenderness which glows in my bosom,
+without trembling, till I see, by your eyes, that it is mutual.
+
+I sit, lost in thought, looking at the sea--and tears rush into my eyes,
+when I find that I am cherishing any fond expectations.--I have indeed
+been so unhappy this winter, I find it as difficult to acquire fresh
+hopes, as to regain tranquillity.--Enough of this--lie still, foolish
+heart!--But for the little girl, I could almost wish that it should cease
+to beat, to be no more alive to the anguish of disappointment.
+
+Sweet little creature! I deprived myself of my only pleasure, when I
+weaned her, about ten days ago.--I am however glad I conquered my
+repugnance.--It was necessary it should be done soon, and I did not wish
+to embitter the renewal of your acquaintance with her, by putting it off
+till we met.--It was a painful exertion to me, and I thought it best to
+throw this inquietude with the rest, into the sack that I would fain
+throw over my shoulder.--I wished to endure it alone, in short--Yet,
+after sending her to sleep in the next room for three or four nights, you
+cannot think with what joy I took her back again to sleep in my bosom!
+
+I suppose I shall find you, when I arrive, for I do not see any necessity
+for your coming to me.--Pray inform Mr. ------, that I have his little
+friend with me.--My wishing to oblige him, made me put myself to some
+inconvenience----and delay my departure; which was irksome to me, who
+have not quite as much philosophy, I would not for the world say
+indifference, as you. God bless you!
+
+Yours truly,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XXXIX.
+
+Brighthelmstone, Saturday, April 11.
+
+HERE we are, my love, and mean to set out early in the morning; and, if I
+can find you, I hope to dine with you to-morrow.--I shall drive to
+------'s hotel, where ------ tells me you have been--and, if you have
+left it, I hope you will take care to be there to receive us.
+
+I have brought with me Mr. ----'s little friend, and a girl whom I like
+to take care of our little darling--not on the way, for that fell to my
+share.--But why do I write about trifles?--or any thing?--Are we not to
+meet soon?--What does your heart say!
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+I have weaned my ------, and she is now eating away at the white bread.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XL.
+
+London, Friday, May 22.
+
+I HAVE just received your affectionate letter, and am distressed to think
+that I have added to your embarrassments at this troublesome juncture,
+when the exertion of all the faculties of your mind appears to be
+necessary, to extricate you out of your pecuniary difficulties. I suppose
+it was something relative to the circumstance you have mentioned, which
+made ------ request to see me to-day, to _converse about a matter of
+great importance_. Be that as it may, his letter (such is the state of my
+spirits) inconceivably alarmed me, and rendered the last night as
+distressing, as the two former had been.
+
+I have laboured to calm my mind since you left me--Still I find that
+tranquillity is not to be obtained by exertion; it is a feeling so
+different from the resignation of despair!--I am however no longer angry
+with you--nor will I ever utter another complaint--there are arguments
+which convince the reason, whilst they carry death to the heart.--We have
+had too many cruel explanations, that not only cloud every future
+prospect; but embitter the remembrances which alone give life to
+affection.--Let the subject never be revived!
+
+It seems to me that I have not only lost the hope, but the power of being
+happy.--Every emotion is now sharpened by anguish.--My soul has been
+shook, and my tone of feelings destroyed.--I have gone out--and sought
+for dissipation, if not amusement, merely to fatigue still more, I find,
+my irritable nerves----
+
+My friend--my dear friend--examine yourself well--I am out of the
+question; for, alas! I am nothing--and discover what you wish to do--what
+will render you most comfortable--or, to be more explicit--whether you
+desire to live with me, or part for ever? When you can once ascertain it,
+tell me frankly, I conjure you!--for, believe me, I have very
+involuntarily interrupted your peace.
+
+I shall expect you to dinner on Monday, and will endeavour to assume a
+cheerful face to greet you--at any rate I will avoid conversations,
+which only tend to harrass your feelings, because I am most
+affectionately yours,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLI.
+
+Wednesday.
+
+I INCLOSE you the letter, which you desired me to forward, and I am
+tempted very laconically to wish you a good morning--not because I am
+angry, or have nothing to say; but to keep down a wounded spirit.--I
+shall make every effort to calm my mind--yet a strong conviction seems to
+whirl round in the very centre of my brain, which, like the fiat of
+fate, emphatically assures me, that grief has a firm hold of my heart.
+
+God bless you!
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLII.
+
+--, Wednesday, Two o'Clock.
+
+WE arrived here about an hour ago. I am extremely fatigued with the
+child, who would not rest quiet with any body but me, during the
+night--and now we are here in a comfortless, damp room, in a sort of a
+tomb-like house. This however I shall quickly remedy, for, when I have
+finished this letter, (which I must do immediately, because the post goes
+out early), I shall sally forth, and enquire about a vessel and an inn.
+
+I will not distress you by talking of the depression of my spirits, or
+the struggle I had to keep alive my dying heart.--It is even now too full
+to allow me to write with composure.--*****,--dear *****, --am I always
+to be tossed about thus?--shall I never find an asylum to rest
+_contented_ in? How can you love to fly about continually--dropping down,
+as it were, in a new world--cold and strange!--every other day? Why do
+you not attach those tender emotions round the idea of home, which even
+now dim my eyes?--This alone is affection--every thing else is only
+humanity, electrified by sympathy.
+
+I will write to you again to-morrow, when I know how long I am to be
+detained--and hope to get a letter quickly from you, to cheer yours
+sincerely and affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+------ is playing near me in high spirits. She was so pleased with the
+noise of the mail-horn, she has been continually imitating it.----Adieu!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLIII.
+
+Thursday.
+
+A LADY has just sent to offer to take me to ------. I have then only a
+moment to exclaim against the vague manner in which people give
+information    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+But why talk of inconveniences, which are in fact trifling, when compared
+with the sinking of the heart I have felt! I did not intend to touch this
+painful string--God bless you!
+
+Yours truly,
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLIV.
+
+Friday, June 12.
+
+I HAVE just received yours dated the 9th, which I suppose was a mistake,
+for it could scarcely have loitered so long on the road. The general
+observations which apply to the state of your own mind, appear to me
+just, as far as they go; and I shall always consider it as one of the
+most serious misfortunes of my life, that I did not meet you, before
+satiety had rendered your senses so fastidious, as almost to close up
+every tender avenue of sentiment and affection that leads to your
+sympathetic heart. You have a heart, my friend, yet, hurried away by the
+impetuosity of inferior feelings, you have sought in vulgar excesses,
+for that gratification which only the heart can bestow.
+
+The common run of men, I know, with strong health and gross appetites,
+must have variety to banish _ennui_, because the imagination never lends
+its magic wand, to convert appetite into love, cemented by according
+reason.--Ah! my friend, you know not the ineffable delight, the exquisite
+pleasure, which arises from a unison of affection and desire, when the
+whole soul and senses are abandoned to a lively imagination, that renders
+every emotion delicate and rapturous. Yes; these are emotions, over which
+satiety has no power, and the recollection of which, even disappointment
+cannot disenchant; but they do not exist without self-denial. These
+emotions, more or less strong, appear to me to be the distinctive
+characteristic of genius, the foundation of taste, and of that exquisite
+relish for the beauties of nature, of which the common herd of eaters and
+drinkers and _child-begeters_, certainly have no idea. You will smile at
+an observation that has just occurred to me:--I consider those minds as
+the most strong and original, whose imagination acts as the stimulus to
+their senses.
+
+Well! you will ask, what is the result of all this reasoning? Why I
+cannot help thinking that it is possible for you, having great strength
+of mind, to return to nature, and regain a sanity of constitution, and
+purity of feeling--which would open your heart to me.--I would fain rest
+there!
+
+Yet, convinced more than ever of the sincerity and tenderness of my
+attachment to you, the involuntary hopes, which a determination to live
+has revived, are not sufficiently strong to dissipate the cloud, that
+despair has spread over futurity. I have looked at the sea, and at my
+child, hardly daring to own to myself the secret wish, that it might
+become our tomb; and that the heart, still so alive to anguish, might
+there be quieted by death. At this moment ten thousand complicated
+sentiments press for utterance, weigh on my heart, and obscure my sight.
+
+Are we ever to meet again? and will you endeavour to render that meeting
+happier than the last? Will you endeavour to restrain your caprices, in
+order to give vigour to affection, and to give play to the checked
+sentiments that nature intended should expand your heart? I cannot
+indeed, without agony, think of your bosom's being continually
+contaminated; and bitter are the tears which exhaust my eyes, when I
+recollect why my child and I are forced to stray from the asylum, in
+which, after so many storms, I had hoped to rest, smiling at angry
+fate.--These are not common sorrows; nor can you perhaps conceive, how
+much active fortitude it requires to labour perpetually to blunt the
+shafts of disappointment.
+
+Examine now yourself, and ascertain whether you can live in
+something-like a settled stile. Let our confidence in future be
+unbounded; consider whether you find it necessary to sacrifice me to what
+you term "the zest of life;" and, when you have once a clear view of your
+own motives, of your own incentive to action, do not deceive me!
+
+The train of thoughts which the writing of this epistle awoke, makes me
+so wretched, that I must take a walk, to rouse and calm my mind. But
+first, let me tell you, that, if you really wish to promote my happiness,
+you will endeavour to give me as much as you can of yourself. You have
+great mental energy; and your judgment seems to me so just, that it is
+only the dupe of your inclination in discussing one subject.
+
+The post does not go out to-day. To-morrow I may write more tranquilly. I
+cannot yet say when the vessel will sail in which I have determined to
+depart.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Saturday Morning.
+
+Your second letter reached me about an hour ago. You were certainly
+wrong, in supposing that I did not mention you with respect; though,
+without my being conscious of it, some sparks of resentment may have
+animated the gloom of despair--Yes; with less affection, I should have
+been more respectful. However the regard which I have for you, is so
+unequivocal to myself, I imagine that it must be sufficiently obvious to
+every body else. Besides, the only letter I intended for the public eye
+was to ----, and that I destroyed from delicacy before you saw them,
+because it was only written (of course warmly in your praise) to prevent
+any odium being thrown on you[133-A].
+
+I am harrassed by your embarrassments, and shall certainly use all my
+efforts, to make the business terminate to your satisfaction in which I
+am engaged.
+
+My friend--my dearest friend--I feel my fate united to yours by the most
+sacred principles of my soul, and the yearns of--yes, I will say it--a
+true, unsophisticated heart.
+
+Yours most truly
+
+* * * *
+
+If the wind be fair, the captain talks of sailing on Monday; but I am
+afraid I shall be detained some days longer. At any rate, continue to
+write, (I want this support) till you are sure I am where I cannot expect
+a letter; and, if any should arrive after my departure, a gentleman (not
+Mr. ----'s friend, I promise you) from whom I have received great
+civilities, will send them after me.
+
+Do write by every occasion! I am anxious to hear how your affairs go on;
+and, still more, to be convinced that you are not separating yourself
+from us. For my little darling is calling papa, and adding her parrot
+word--Come, Come! And will you not come, and let us exert ourselves?--I
+shall recover all my energy, when I am convinced that my exertions will
+draw us more closely together. One more adieu!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLV.
+
+Sunday, June 14.
+
+I RATHER expected to hear from you to-day--I wish you would not fail to
+write to me for a little time, because I am not quite well--Whether I
+have any good sleep or not, I wake in the morning in violent fits of
+trembling--and, in spite of all my efforts, the child--every
+thing--fatigues me, in which I seek for solace or amusement.
+
+Mr. ---- forced on me a letter to a physician of this place; it was
+fortunate, for I should otherwise have had some difficulty to obtain the
+necessary information. His wife is a pretty woman (I can admire, you
+know, a pretty woman, when I am alone) and he an intelligent and rather
+interesting man.--They have behaved to me with great hospitality; and
+poor ------ was never so happy in her life, as amongst their young brood.
+
+They took me in their carriage to ------, and I ran over my favourite
+walks, with a vivacity that would have astonished you.--The town did not
+please me quite so well as formerly--It appeared so diminutive; and, when
+I found that many of the inhabitants had lived in the same houses ever
+since I left it, I could not help wondering how they could thus have
+vegetated, whilst I was running over a world of sorrow, snatching at
+pleasure, and throwing off prejudices. The place where I at present am,
+is much improved; but it is astonishing what strides aristocracy and
+fanaticism have made, since I resided in this country.
+
+The wind does not appear inclined to change, so I am still forced to
+linger--When do you think that you shall be able to set out for France? I
+do not entirely like the aspect of your affairs, and still less your
+connections on either side of the water. Often do I sigh, when I think of
+your entanglements in business, and your extreme restlessness of
+mind.--Even now I am almost afraid to ask you, whether the pleasure of
+being free, does not over-balance the pain you felt at parting with me?
+Sometimes I indulge the hope that you will feel me necessary to you--or
+why should we meet again?--but, the moment after, despair damps my rising
+spirits, aggravated by the emotions of tenderness, which ought to soften
+the cares of life.----God bless you!
+
+Yours sincerely and affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLVI.
+
+June 15.
+
+I WANT to know how you have settled with respect to ------. In short, be
+very particular in your account of all your affairs--let our confidence,
+my dear, be unbounded.--The last time we were separated, was a separation
+indeed on your part--Now you have acted more ingenuously, let the most
+affectionate interchange of sentiments fill up the aching void of
+disappointment. I almost dread that your plans will prove abortive--yet
+should the most unlucky turn send you home to us, convinced that a true
+friend is a treasure, I should not much mind having to struggle with the
+world again. Accuse me not of pride--yet sometimes, when nature has
+opened my heart to its author, I have wondered that you did not set a
+higher value on my heart.
+
+Receive a kiss from ------, I was going to add, if you will not take one
+from me, and believe me yours
+
+Sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+The wind still continues in the same quarter.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLVII.
+
+Tuesday Morning.
+
+THE captain has just sent to inform me, that I must be on board in the
+course of a few hours.--I wished to have stayed till to-morrow. It would
+have been a comfort to me to have received another letter from
+you--Should one arrive, it will be sent after me.
+
+My spirits are agitated, I scarcely know why----The quitting England
+seems to be a fresh parting.--Surely you will not forget me.--A thousand
+weak forebodings assault my soul, and the state of my health renders me
+sensible to every thing. It is surprising that in London, in a continual
+conflict of mind, I was still growing better--whilst here, bowed down by
+the despotic hand of fate, forced into resignation by despair, I seem to
+be fading away--perishing beneath a cruel blight, that withers up all my
+faculties.
+
+The child is perfectly well. My hand seems unwilling to add adieu! I know
+not why this inexpressible sadness has taken possession of me.--It is not
+a presentiment of ill. Yet, having been so perpetually the sport of
+disappointment,--having a heart that has been as it were a mark for
+misery, I dread to meet wretchedness in some new shape.--Well, let it
+come--I care not!--what have I to dread, who have so little to hope for!
+God bless you--I am most affectionately and sincerely yours
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLVIII.
+
+Wednesday Morning.
+
+I WAS hurried on board yesterday about three o'clock, the wind having
+changed. But before evening it veered round to the old point; and here we
+are, in the midst of mists and water, only taking advantage of the tide
+to advance a few miles.
+
+You will scarcely suppose that I left the town with reluctance--yet it
+was even so--for I wished to receive another letter from you, and I felt
+pain at parting, for ever perhaps, from the amiable family, who had
+treated me with so much hospitality and kindness. They will probably send
+me your letter, if it arrives this morning; for here we are likely to
+remain, I am afraid to think how long.
+
+The vessel is very commodious, and the captain a civil, open-hearted kind
+of man. There being no other passengers, I have the cabin to myself,
+which is pleasant; and I have brought a few books with me to beguile
+weariness; but I seem inclined, rather to employ the dead moments of
+suspence in writing some effusions, than in reading.
+
+What are you about? How are your affairs going on? It may be a long time
+before you answer these questions. My dear friend, my heart sinks within
+me!--Why am I forced thus to struggle continually with my affections and
+feelings?--Ah! why are those affections and feelings the source of so
+much misery, when they seem to have been given to vivify my heart, and
+extend my usefulness! But I must not dwell on this subject.--Will you not
+endeavour to cherish all the affection you can for me? What am I
+saying?--Rather forget me, if you can--if other gratifications are dearer
+to you.--How is every remembrance of mine embittered by disappointment?
+What a world is this!--They only seem happy, who never look beyond
+sensual or artificial enjoyments.--Adieu!
+
+------ begins to play with the cabin-boy, and is as gay as a lark.--I
+will labour to be tranquil; and am in every mood,
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XLIX.
+
+Thursday.
+
+HERE I am still--and I have just received your letter of Monday by the
+pilot, who promised to bring it to me, if we were detained, as he
+expected, by the wind.--It is indeed wearisome to be thus tossed about
+without going forward.--I have a violent head-ache--yet I am obliged to
+take care of the child, who is a little tormented by her teeth, because
+------ is unable to do any thing, she is rendered so sick by the motion
+of the ship, as we ride at anchor.
+
+These are however trifling inconveniences, compared with anguish of
+mind--compared with the sinking of a broken heart.--To tell you the
+truth, I never suffered in my life so much from depression of
+spirits--from despair.--I do not sleep--or, if I close my eyes, it is to
+have the most terrifying dreams, in which I often meet you with different
+casts of countenance.
+
+I will not, my dear ------, torment you by dwelling on my sufferings--and
+will use all my efforts to calm my mind, instead of deadening it--at
+present it is most painfully active. I find I am not equal to these
+continual struggles--yet your letter this morning has afforded me some
+comfort--and I will try to revive hope. One thing let me tell you--when
+we meet again--surely we are to meet!--it must be to part no more. I mean
+not to have seas between us--it is more than I can support.
+
+The pilot is hurrying me--God bless you.
+
+In spite of the commodiousness of the vessel, every thing here would
+disgust my senses, had I nothing else to think of--"When the mind's free,
+the body's delicate;"--mine has been too much hurt to regard trifles.
+
+Yours most truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER L.
+
+Saturday.
+
+THIS is the fifth dreary day I have been imprisoned by the wind, with
+every outward object to disgust the senses, and unable to banish the
+remembrances that sadden my heart.
+
+How am I altered by disappointment!--When going to ----, ten years ago,
+the elasticity of my mind was sufficient to ward off weariness--and the
+imagination still could dip her brush in the rainbow of fancy, and sketch
+futurity in smiling colours. Now I am going towards the North in search
+of sunbeams!--Will any ever warm this desolated heart? All nature seems
+to frown--or rather mourn with me.--Every thing is cold--cold as my
+expectations! Before I left the shore, tormented, as I now am, by these
+North east _chillers_, I could not help exclaiming--Give me, gracious
+Heaven! at least, genial weather, if I am never to meet the genial
+affection that still warms this agitated bosom--compelling life to linger
+there.
+
+I am now going on shore with the captain, though the weather be rough,
+to seek for milk, &c. at a little village, and to take a walk--after
+which I hope to sleep--for, confined here, surrounded by disagreeable
+smells, I have lost the little appetite I had; and I lie awake, till
+thinking almost drives me to the brink of madness--only to the brink, for
+I never forget, even in the feverish slumbers I sometimes fall into, the
+misery I am labouring to blunt the the sense of, by every exertion in my
+power.
+
+Poor ------ still continues sick, and ------ grows weary when the weather
+will not allow her to remain on deck.
+
+I hope this will be the last letter I shall write from England to
+you--are you not tired of this lingering adieu?
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LI.
+
+Sunday Morning.
+
+THE captain last night, after I had written my letter to you intended to
+be left at a little village, offered to go to ---- to pass to-day. We had
+a troublesome sail--and now I must hurry on board again, for the wind has
+changed.
+
+I half expected to find a letter from you here. Had you written one
+haphazard, it would have been kind and considerate--you might have known,
+had you thought, that the wind would not permit me to depart. These are
+attentions, more grateful to the heart than offers of service--But why
+do I foolishly continue to look for them?
+
+Adieu! adieu! My friend--your friendship is very cold--you see I am
+hurt.--God bless you! I may perhaps be, some time or other, independent
+in every sense of the word--Ah! there is but one sense of it of
+consequence. I will break or bend this weak heart--yet even now it is
+full.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+The child is well; I did not leave her on board.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LII.
+
+June 27, Saturday.
+
+I ARRIVED in ------ this afternoon, after vainly attempting to land at
+----. I have now but a moment, before the post goes out, to inform you we
+have got here; though not without considerable difficulty, for we were
+set ashore in a boat above twenty miles below.
+
+What I suffered in the vessel I will not now descant upon--nor mention
+the pleasure I received from the sight of the rocky coast.--This morning
+however, walking to join the carriage that was to transport us to this
+place, I fell, without any previous warning, senseless on the rocks--and
+how I escaped with life I can scarcely guess. I was in a stupour for a
+quarter of an hour; the suffusion of blood at last restored me to my
+senses--the contusion is great, and my brain confused. The child is well.
+
+Twenty miles ride in the rain, after my accident, has sufficiently
+deranged me--and here I could not get a fire to warm me, or any thing
+warm to eat; the inns are mere stables--I must nevertheless go to bed.
+For God's sake, let me hear from you immediately, my friend! I am not
+well and yet you see I cannot die.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LIII.
+
+June 29.
+
+I WROTE to you by the last post, to inform you of my arrival; and I
+believe I alluded to the extreme fatigue I endured on ship-board, owing
+to ------'s illness, and the roughness of the weather--I likewise
+mentioned to you my fall, the effects of which I still feel, though I do
+not think it will have any serious consequences.
+
+------ will go with me, if I find it necessary to go to ------. The inns
+here are so bad, I was forced to accept of an apartment in his house. I
+am overwhelmed with civilities on all sides, and fatigued with the
+endeavours to amuse me, from which I cannot escape.
+
+My friend--my friend, I am not well--a deadly weight of sorrow lies
+heavily on my heart. I am again tossed on the troubled billows of life;
+and obliged to cope with difficulties, without being buoyed up by the
+hopes that alone render them bearable. "How flat, dull, and
+unprofitable," appears to me all the bustle into which I see people here
+so eagerly enter! I long every night to go to bed, to hide my melancholy
+face in my pillow; but there is a canker-worm in my bosom that never
+sleeps.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LIV.
+
+July 1.
+
+I LABOUR in vain to calm my mind--my soul has been overwhelmed by sorrow
+and disappointment. Every thing fatigues me--this is a life that cannot
+last long. It is you who must determine with respect to futurity--and,
+when you have, I will act accordingly--I mean, we must either resolve to
+live together, or part for ever, I cannot bear these continual
+struggles--But I wish you to examine carefully your own heart and mind;
+and, if you perceive the least chance of being happier without me than
+with me, or if your inclination leans capriciously to that side, do not
+dissemble; but tell me frankly that you will never see me more. I will
+then adopt the plan I mentioned to you--for we must either live together,
+or I will be entirely independent.
+
+My heart is so oppressed, I cannot write with precision--You know however
+that what I so imperfectly express, are not the crude sentiments of the
+moment--You can only contribute to my comfort (it is the consolation I am
+in need of) by being with me--and, if the tenderest friendship is of any
+value, why will you not look to me for a degree of satisfaction that
+heartless affections cannot bestow?
+
+Tell me then, will you determine to meet me at Basle?--I shall, I should
+imagine, be at ------ before the close of August; and, after you settle
+your affairs at Paris, could we not meet there?
+
+God bless you!
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+Poor ------ has suffered during the journey with her teeth.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LV.
+
+July 3.
+
+THERE was a gloominess diffused through your last letter, the impression
+of which still rests on my mind--though, recollecting how quickly you
+throw off the forcible feelings of the moment, I flatter myself it has
+long since given place to your usual cheerfulness.
+
+Believe me (and my eyes fill with tears of tenderness as I assure you)
+there is nothing I would not endure in the way of privation, rather than
+disturb your tranquillity.--If I am fated to be unhappy, I will labour to
+hide my sorrows in my own bosom; and you shall always find me a faithful,
+affectionate friend.
+
+I grow more and more attached to my little girl--and I cherish this
+affection without fear, because it must be a long time before it can
+become bitterness of soul.--She is an interesting creature.--On
+ship-board, how often as I gazed at the sea, have I longed to bury my
+troubled bosom in the less troubled deep; asserting with Brutus, "that
+the virtue I had followed too far, was merely an empty name!" and
+nothing but the sight of her--her playful smiles, which seemed to cling
+and twine round my heart--could have stopped me.
+
+What peculiar misery has fallen to my share! To act up to my principles,
+I have laid the strictest restraint on my very thoughts--yes; not to
+sully the delicacy of my feelings, I have reined in my imagination; and
+started with affright from every sensation, (I allude to ----) that
+stealing with balmy sweetness into my soul, led me to scent from afar the
+fragrance of reviving nature.
+
+My friend, I have dearly paid for one conviction.--Love, in some minds,
+is an affair of sentiment, arising from the same delicacy of perception
+(or taste) as renders them alive to the beauties of nature, poetry, &c,
+alive to the charms of those evanescent graces that are, as it were,
+impalpable--they must be felt, they cannot be described.
+
+Love is a want of my heart. I have examined myself lately with more care
+than formerly, and find, that to deaden is not to calm the mind--Aiming
+at tranquillity, I have almost destroyed all the energy of my
+soul--almost rooted out what renders it estimable--Yes, I have damped
+that enthusiasm of character, which converts the grossest materials into
+a fuel, that imperceptibly feeds hopes, which aspire above common
+enjoyment. Despair, since the birth of my child, has rendered me
+stupid--soul and body seemed to be fading away before the withering touch
+of disappointment.
+
+I am now endeavouring to recover myself--and such is the elasticity of my
+constitution, and the purity of the atmosphere here, that health unsought
+for, begins to reanimate my countenance.
+
+I have the sincerest esteem and affection for you--but the desire of
+regaining peace, (do you understand me?) has made me forget the respect
+due to my own emotions--sacred emotions, that are the sure harbingers of
+the delights I was formed to enjoy--and shall enjoy, for nothing can
+extinguish the heavenly spark.
+
+Still, when we meet again, I will not torment you, I promise you. I blush
+when I recollect my former conduct--and will not in future confound
+myself with the beings whom I feel to be my inferiors.--I will listen to
+delicacy, or pride.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LVI.
+
+July 4.
+
+I HOPE to hear from you by to-morrow's mail. My dearest friend! I cannot
+tear my affections from you--and, though every remembrance stings me to
+the soul, I think of you, till I make allowance for the very defects of
+character, that have given such a cruel stab to my peace.
+
+Still however I am more alive, than you have seen me for a long, long
+time. I have a degree of vivacity, even in my grief, which is preferable
+to the benumbing stupour that, for the last year, has frozen up all my
+faculties.--Perhaps this change is more owing to returning health, than
+to the vigour of my reason--for, in spite of sadness (and surely I have
+had my share), the purity of this air, and the being continually out in
+it, for I sleep in the country every night, has made an alteration in my
+appearance that really surprises me.--The rosy fingers of health already
+streak my cheeks--and I have seen a _physical_ life in my eyes, after I
+have been climbing the rocks, that resembled the fond, credulous hopes of
+youth.
+
+With what a cruel sigh have I recollected that I had forgotten to
+hope!--Reason, or rather experience, does not thus cruelly damp poor
+------'s pleasures; she plays all day in the garden with ------'s
+children, and makes friends for herself.
+
+Do not tell me, that you are happier without us--Will you not come to us
+in Switzerland? Ah, why do not you love us with more sentiment?--why are
+you a creature of such sympathy, that the warmth of your feelings, or
+rather quickness of your senses, hardens your heart? It is my misfortune,
+that my imagination is perpetually shading your defects, and lending you
+charms, whilst the grossness of your senses makes you (call me not vain)
+overlook graces in me, that only dignity of mind, and the sensibility of
+an expanded heart can give.--God bless you! Adieu.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LVII.
+
+July 7.
+
+I COULD not help feeling extremely mortified last post, at not receiving
+a letter from you. My being at ------was but a chance, and you might have
+hazarded it; and would a year ago.
+
+I shall not however complain--There are misfortunes so great, as to
+silence the usual expressions of sorrow--Believe me, there is such a
+thing as a broken heart! There are characters whose very energy preys
+upon them; and who, ever inclined to cherish by reflection some passion,
+cannot rest satisfied with the common comforts of life. I have
+endeavoured to fly from myself, and launched into all the dissipation
+possible here, only to feel keener anguish, when alone with my child.
+
+Still, could any thing please me--had not disappointment cut me off from
+life, this romantic country, these fine evenings, would interest me.--My
+God! can any thing? and am I ever to feel alive only to painful
+sensations?--But it cannot--it shall not last long.
+
+The post is again arrived; I have sent to seek for letters, only to be
+wounded to the soul by a negative.--My brain seems on fire, I must go
+into the air.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LVIII.
+
+July 14.
+
+I AM now on my journey to ------. I felt more at leaving my child, than I
+thought I should--and, whilst at night I imagined every instant that I
+heard the half-formed sounds of her voice,--I asked myself how I could
+think of parting with her for ever, of leaving her thus helpless?
+
+Poor lamb! It may run very well in a tale, that "God will temper the
+winds to the shorn lamb!" but how can I expect that she will be shielded,
+when my naked bosom has had to brave continually the pitiless storm?
+Yes; I could add, with poor Lear--What is the war of elements to the
+pangs of disappointed affection, and the horror arising from a discovery
+of a breach of confidence, that snaps every social tie!
+
+All is not right somewhere!--When you first knew me, I was not thus lost.
+I could still confide--for I opened my heart to you--of this only comfort
+you have deprived me, whilst my happiness, you tell me, was your first
+object. Strange want of judgment!
+
+I will not complain; but, from the soundness of your understanding, I am
+convinced, if you give yourself leave to reflect, you will also feel,
+that your conduct to me, so far from being generous, has not been
+just.--I mean not to allude to factitious principles of morality; but to
+the simple basis of all rectitude.--However I did not intend to
+argue--Your not writing is cruel--and my reason is perhaps disturbed by
+constant wretchedness.
+
+Poor ------ would fain have accompanied me, out of tenderness; for my
+fainting, or rather convulsion, when I landed, and my sudden changes of
+countenance since, have alarmed her so much, that she is perpetually
+afraid of some accident--But it would have injured the child this warm
+season, as she is cutting her teeth.
+
+I hear not of your having written to me at ----. Very well! Act as you
+please--there is nothing I fear or care for! When I see whether I can, or
+cannot obtain the money I am come here about, I will not trouble you with
+letters to which you do not reply.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LIX.
+
+July 18.
+
+I AM here in ----, separated from my child--and here I must remain a
+month at least, or I might as well never have come.    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I have begun -------- which will, I hope, discharge all my obligations of
+a pecuniary kind.--I am lowered in my own eyes, on account of my not
+having done it sooner.
+
+I shall make no further comments on your silence. God bless you!
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LX.
+
+July 30.
+
+I HAVE just received two of your letters, dated the 26th and 30th of
+June; and you must have received several from me, informing you of my
+detention, and how much I was hurt by your silence.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Write to me then, my friend, and write explicitly. I have suffered, God
+knows, since I left you. Ah! you have never felt this kind of sickness of
+heart!--My mind however is at present painfully active, and the sympathy
+I feel almost rises to agony. But this is not a subject of complaint, it
+has afforded me pleasure,--and reflected pleasure is all I have to hope
+for--if a spark of hope be yet alive in my forlorn bosom.
+
+I will try to write with a degree of composure. I wish for us to live
+together, because I want you to acquire an habitual tenderness for my
+poor girl. I cannot bear to think of leaving her alone in the world, or
+that she should only be protected by your sense of duty. Next to
+preserving her, my most earnest wish is not to disturb your peace. I have
+nothing to expect, and little to fear, in life--There are wounds that can
+never be healed--but they may be allowed to fester in silence without
+wincing.
+
+When we meet again, you shall be convinced that I have more resolution
+than you give me credit for. I will not torment you. If I am destined
+always to be disappointed and unhappy, I will conceal the anguish I
+cannot dissipate; and the tightened cord of life or reason will at last
+snap, and set me free.
+
+Yes; I shall be happy--This heart is worthy of the bliss its feelings
+anticipate--and I cannot even persuade myself, wretched as they have made
+me, that my principles and sentiments are not founded in nature and
+truth. But to have done with these subjects.
+
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I have been seriously employed in this way since I came to ----; yet I
+never was so much in the air.--I walk, I ride on horseback--row, bathe,
+and even sleep in the fields; my health is consequently improved. The
+child, ------informs me, is well. I long to be with her.
+
+Write to me immediately--were I only to think of myself, I could wish you
+to return to me, poor, with the simplicity of character, part of which
+you seem lately to have lost, that first attached to you.
+
+Yours most affectionately
+
+* * * *  * * * * *
+
+I have been subscribing other letters--so I mechanically did the same to
+yours.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXI.
+
+August 5.
+
+EMPLOYMENT and exercise have been of great service to me; and I have
+entirely recovered the strength and activity I lost during the time of my
+nursing. I have seldom been in better health; and my mind, though
+trembling to the touch of anguish, is calmer--yet still the same.--I
+have, it is true, enjoyed some tranquillity, and more happiness here,
+than for a long--long time past.--(I say happiness, for I can give no
+other appellation to the exquisite delight this wild country and fine
+summer have afforded me.)--Still, on examining my heart, I find that it
+is so constituted, I cannot live without some particular affection--I am
+afraid not without a passion--and I feel the want of it more in society,
+than in solitude--
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+Writing to you, whenever an affectionate epithet occurs--my eyes fill
+with tears, and my trembling hand stops--you may then depend on my
+resolution, when with you. If I am doomed to be unhappy, I will confine
+my anguish in my own bosom--tenderness, rather than passion, has made me
+sometimes overlook delicacy--the same tenderness will in future restrain
+me. God bless you!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXII.
+
+August 7.
+
+AIR, exercise, and bathing, have restored me to health, braced my
+muscles, and covered my ribs, even whilst I have recovered my former
+activity.--I cannot tell you that my mind is calm, though I have snatched
+some moments of exquisite delight, wandering through the woods, and
+resting on the rocks.
+
+This state of suspense, my friend, is intolerable; we must determine on
+something--and soon;--we must meet shortly, or part for ever. I am
+sensible that I acted foolishly--but I was wretched--when we were
+together--Expecting too much, I let the pleasure I might have caught,
+slip from me. I cannot live with you--I ought not--if you form another
+attachment. But I promise you, mine shall not be intruded on you. Little
+reason have I to expect a shadow of happiness, after the cruel
+disappointments that have rent my heart; but that of my child seems to
+depend on our being together. Still I do not wish you to sacrifice a
+chance of enjoyment for an uncertain good. I feel a conviction, that I
+can provide for her, and it shall be my object--if we are indeed to part
+to meet no more. Her affection must not be divided. She must be a comfort
+to me--if I am to have no other--and only know me as her support.--I feel
+that I cannot endure the anguish of corresponding with you--if we are
+only to correspond.--No; if you seek for happiness elsewhere, my letters
+shall not interrupt your repose. I will be dead to you. I cannot express
+to you what pain it gives me to write about an eternal separation.--You
+must determine--examine yourself--But, for God's sake! spare me the
+anxiety of uncertainty!--I may sink under the trial; but I will not
+complain.
+
+Adieu! If I had any thing more to say to you, it is all flown, and
+absorbed by the most tormenting apprehensions, yet I scarcely know what
+new form of misery I have to dread.
+
+I ought to beg your pardon for having sometimes written peevishly; but
+you will impute it to affection, if you understand any thing of the heart
+of
+
+Yours truly
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXIII.
+
+August 9.
+
+FIVE of your letters have been sent after me from ----. One, dated the
+14th of July, was written in a style which I may have merited, but did
+not expect from you. However this is not a time to reply to it, except to
+assure you that you shall not be tormented with any more complaints. I am
+disgusted with myself for having so long importuned you with my
+affection.----
+
+My child is very well. We shall soon meet, to part no more, I hope--I
+mean, I and my girl.--I shall wait with some degree of anxiety till I am
+informed how your affairs terminate.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXIV.
+
+August 26.
+
+I ARRIVED here last night, and with the most exquisite delight, once more
+pressed my babe to my heart. We shall part no more. You perhaps cannot
+conceive the pleasure it gave me, to see her run about, and play alone.
+Her increasing intelligence attaches me more and more to her. I have
+promised her that I will fulfil my duty to her; and nothing in future
+shall make me forget it. I will also exert myself to obtain an
+independence for her; but I will not be too anxious on this head.
+
+I have already told you, that I have recovered my health. Vigour, and
+even vivacity of mind, have returned with a renovated constitution. As
+for peace, we will not talk of it. I was not made, perhaps, to enjoy the
+calm contentment so termed.--
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+You tell me that my letters torture you; I will not describe the effect
+yours have on me. I received three this morning, the last dated the 7th
+of this month. I mean not to give vent to the emotions they
+produced.--Certainly you are right; our minds are not congenial. I have
+lived in an ideal world, and fostered sentiments that you do not
+comprehend--or you would not treat me thus. I am not, I will not be,
+merely an object of compassion--a clog, however light, to teize you.
+Forget that I exist: I will never remind you. Something emphatical
+whispers me to put an end to these struggles. Be free--I will not
+torment, when I cannot please. I can take care of my child; you need not
+continually tell me that our fortune is inseparable, _that you will try
+to cherish tenderness_ for me. Do no violence to yourself! When we are
+separated, our interest, since you give so much weight to pecuniary
+considerations, will be entirely divided. I want not protection without
+affection; and support I need not, whilst my faculties are undisturbed.
+I had a dislike to living in England; but painful feelings must give way
+to superior considerations. I may not be able to acquire the sum
+necessary to maintain my child and self elsewhere. It is too late to go
+to Switzerland. I shall not remain at ----, living expensively. But be
+not alarmed! I shall not force myself on you any more.
+
+Adieu! I am agitated--my whole frame is convulsed--my lips tremble, as if
+shook by cold, though fire seems to be circulating in my veins.
+
+God bless you.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXV.
+
+September 6.
+
+I RECEIVED just now your letter of the 20th. I had written you a letter
+last night, into which imperceptibly slipt some of my bitterness of soul.
+I will copy the part relative to business. I am not sufficiently vain to
+imagine that I can, for more than a moment, cloud your enjoyment of
+life--to prevent even that, you had better never hear from me--and repose
+on the idea that I am happy.
+
+Gracious God! It is impossible for me to stifle something like
+resentment, when I receive fresh proofs of your indifference. What I
+have suffered this last year, is not to be forgotten! I have not that
+happy substitute for wisdom, insensibility--and the lively sympathies
+which bind me to my fellow-creatures, are all of a painful kind.--They
+are the agonies of a broken heart--pleasure and I have shaken hands.
+
+I see here nothing but heaps of ruins, and only converse with people
+immersed in trade and sensuality.
+
+I am weary of travelling--yet seem to have no home--no resting place to
+look to.--I am strangely cast off.--How often, passing through the rocks,
+I have thought, "But for this child, I would lay my head on one of them,
+and never open my eyes again!" With a heart feelingly alive to all the
+affections of my nature--I have never met with one, softer than the stone
+that I would fain take for my last pillow. I once thought I had, but it
+was all a delusion. I meet with families continually, who are bound
+together by affection or principle--and, when I am conscious that I have
+fulfilled the duties of my station, almost to a forgetfulness of myself,
+I am ready to demand, in a murmuring tone, of Heaven, "Why am I thus
+abandoned?"
+
+You say now   --   --   --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I do not understand you. It is necessary for you to write more
+explicitly--and determine on some mode of conduct.--I cannot endure this
+suspense--Decide--Do you fear to strike another blow? We live together,
+or eternally part!--I shall not write to you again, till I receive an
+answer to this. I must compose my tortured soul, before I write on
+indifferent subjects.   --   --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+I do not know whether I write intelligibly, for my head is
+disturbed.--But this you ought to pardon--for it is with difficulty
+frequently that I make out what you mean to say--You write, I suppose, at
+Mr. ----'s after dinner, when your head is not the clearest--and as for
+your heart, if you have one, I see nothing like the dictates of
+affection, unless a glimpse when you mention, the child.--Adieu!
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXVI.
+
+September 25.
+
+I HAVE just finished a letter, to be given in charge to captain ------.
+In that I complained of your silence, and expressed my surprise that
+three mails should have arrived without bringing a line for me. Since I
+closed it, I hear of another, and still no letter.--I am labouring to
+write calmly--this silence is a refinement on cruelty. Had captain ------
+remained a few days longer, I would have returned with him to England.
+What have I to do here? I have repeatedly written to you fully. Do you
+do the same--and quickly. Do not leave me in suspense. I have not
+deserved this of you. I cannot write, my mind is so distressed. Adieu!
+
+* * * *
+
+
+END VOL. III.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[4-A] The child is in a subsequent letter called the "barrier girl,"
+probably from a supposition that she owed her existence to this
+interview.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+[7-A] This and the thirteen following letters appear to have been written
+during a separation of several months; the date, Paris.
+
+[27-A] Some further letters, written during the remainder of the week, in
+a similar strain to the preceding, appear to have been destroyed by the
+person to whom they were addressed.
+
+[47-A] The child spoken of in some preceding letters, had now been born a
+considerable time.
+
+[50-A] She means, "the latter more than the former."
+
+EDITOR.
+
+[58-A] This is the first of a series of letters written during a
+separation of many months, to which no cordial meeting ever succeeded.
+They were sent from Paris, and bear the address of London.
+
+[91-A] The person to whom the letters are addressed, was about this time
+at Ramsgate, on his return, as he professed, to Paris, when he was
+recalled, as it should seem, to London, by the further pressure of
+business now accumulated upon him.
+
+[100-A] This probably alludes to some expression of the person to whom
+the letters are addressed, in which he treated as common evils, things
+upon which the letter writer was disposed to bestow a different
+appellation.
+
+EDITOR.
+
+[133-A] This passage refers to letters written under a purpose of
+suicide, and not intended to be opened till after the catastrophe.
+
+
+
+
+POSTHUMOUS WORKS
+
+OF THE
+
+AUTHOR
+
+OF A
+
+VINDICATION OF THE RIGHTS OF WOMAN.
+
+IN FOUR VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. IV.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+_LONDON:_
+
+PRINTED FOR J. JOHNSON, NO. 72, ST. PAUL'S
+  CHURCH-YARD; AND G. G. AND J. ROBINSON,
+              PATERNOSTER-ROW.
+                   1798.
+
+
+
+LETTERS
+
+AND
+
+MISCELLANEOUS PIECES.
+
+IN TWO VOLUMES.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+VOL. II.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+                                                       Page
+Letters                                                   1
+Letter on the Present Character of the French Nation     39
+Fragment of Letters on the Management of Infants         55
+Letters to Mr. Johnson                                   61
+Extract of the Cave of Fancy, a Tale                     99
+On Poetry and our Relish for the Beauties of Nature     159
+Hints                                                   179
+
+
+
+
+ERRATA.
+
+
+Page 10, line 8, _for_ I write you, _read_ I write to you.
+---- 20, -- 9, _read_ bring them to ----.
+---- 146, -- 2 from the bottom, after over, insert a comma.
+
+
+
+
+LETTERS.
+
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXVII.
+
+September 27.
+
+WHEN you receive this, I shall either have landed, or be hovering on the
+British coast--your letter of the 18th decided me.
+
+By what criterion of principle or affection, you term my questions
+extraordinary and unnecessary, I cannot determine.--You desire me to
+decide--I had decided. You must have had long ago two letters of mine,
+from ------, to the same purport, to consider.--In these, God knows!
+there was but too much affection, and the agonies of a distracted mind
+were but too faithfully pourtrayed!--What more then had I to say?--The
+negative was to come from you.--You had perpetually recurred to your
+promise of meeting me in the autumn--Was it extraordinary that I should
+demand a yes, or no?--Your letter is written with extreme harshness,
+coldness I am accustomed to, in it I find not a trace of the tenderness
+of humanity, much less of friendship.--I only see a desire to heave a
+load off your shoulders.
+
+I am above disputing about words.--It matters not in what terms you
+decide.
+
+The tremendous power who formed this heart, must have foreseen that, in a
+world in which self-interest, in various shapes, is the principal mobile,
+I had little chance of escaping misery.--To the fiat of fate I submit.--I
+am content to be wretched; but I will not be contemptible.--Of me you
+have no cause to complain, but for having had too much regard for
+you--for having expected a degree of permanent happiness, when you only
+sought for a momentary gratification.
+
+I am strangely deficient in sagacity.--Uniting myself to you, your
+tenderness seemed to make me amends for all my former misfortunes.--On
+this tenderness and affection with what confidence did I rest!--but I
+leaned on a spear, that has pierced me to the heart.--You have thrown off
+a faithful friend, to pursue the caprices of the moment.--We certainly
+are differently organized; for even now, when conviction has been stamped
+on my soul by sorrow, I can scarcely believe it possible. It depends at
+present on you, whether you will see me or not.--I shall take no step,
+till I see or hear from you.
+
+Preparing myself for the worst--I have determined, if your next letter be
+like the last, to write to Mr. ------to procure me an obscure lodging,
+and not to inform any body of my arrival.--There I will endeavour in a
+few months to obtain the sum necessary to take me to France--from you I
+will not receive any more.--I am not yet sufficiently humbled to depend
+on your beneficence.
+
+Some people, whom my unhappiness has interested, though they know not
+the extent of it, will assist me to attain the object I have in view, the
+independence of my child. Should a peace take place, ready money will go
+a great way in France--and I will borrow a sum, which my industry _shall_
+enable me to pay at my leisure, to purchase a small estate for my
+girl.--The assistance I shall find necessary to complete her education, I
+can get at an easy rate at Paris--I can introduce her to such society as
+she will like--and thus, securing for her all the chance for happiness,
+which depends on me, I shall die in peace, persuaded that the felicity
+which has hitherto cheated my expectation, will not always elude my
+grasp. No poor tempest-tossed mariner ever more earnestly longed to
+arrive at his port.
+
+* * * *
+
+I shall not come up in the vessel all the way, because I have no place to
+go to. Captain ------ will inform you where I am. It is needless to add,
+that I am not in a state of mind to bear suspense--and that I wish to see
+you, though it be for the last time.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXVIII.
+
+Sunday, October 4.
+
+I WROTE to you by the packet, to inform you, that your letter of the 18th
+of last month, had determined me to set out with captain ------; but, as
+we sailed very quick, I take it for granted, that you have not yet
+received it.
+
+You say, I must decide for myself.--I had decided, that it was most for
+the interest of my little girl, and for my own comfort, little as I
+expect, for us to live together; and I even thought that you would be
+glad, some years hence, when the tumult of business was over, to repose
+in the society of an affectionate friend, and mark the progress of our
+interesting child, whilst endeavouring to be of use in the circle you at
+last resolved to rest in; for you cannot run about for ever.
+
+From the tenour of your last letter however, I am led to imagine, that
+you have formed some new attachment.--If it be so, let me earnestly
+request you to see me once more, and immediately. This is the only proof
+I require of the friendship you profess for me. I will then decide,
+since you boggle about a mere form.
+
+I am labouring to write with calmness--but the extreme anguish I feel, at
+landing without having any friend to receive me, and even to be conscious
+that the friend whom I most wish to see, will feel a disagreeable
+sensation at being informed of my arrival, does not come under the
+description of common misery. Every emotion yields to an overwhelming
+flood of sorrow--and the playfulness of my child distresses me.--On her
+account, I wished to remain a few days here, comfortless as is my
+situation.--Besides, I did not wish to surprise you. You have told me,
+that you would make any sacrifice to promote my happiness--and, even in
+your last unkind letter, you talk of the ties which bind you to me and
+my child.--Tell me, that you wish it, and I will cut this Gordian knot.
+
+I now most earnestly intreat you to write to me, without fail, by the
+return of the post. Direct your letter to be left at the post-office, and
+tell me whether you will come to me here, or where you will meet me. I
+can receive your letter on Wednesday morning.
+
+Do not keep me in suspense.--I expect nothing from you, or any human
+being: my die is cast!--I have fortitude enough to determine to do my
+duty; yet I cannot raise my depressed spirits, or calm my trembling
+heart.--That being who moulded it thus, knows that I am unable to tear up
+by the roots the propensity to affection which has been the torment of my
+life--but life will have an end!
+
+Should you come here (a few months ago I could not have doubted it) you
+will find me at ------. If you prefer meeting me on the road, tell me
+where.
+
+Yours affectionately
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXIX.
+
+I WRITE you now on my knees; imploring you to send my child and the maid
+with ----, to Paris, to be consigned to the care of Madame ----, rue
+----, section de ----. Should they be removed, ---- can give their
+direction.
+
+Let the maid have all my clothes, without distinction.
+
+Pray pay the cook her wages, and do not mention the confession which I
+forced from her--a little sooner or later is of no consequence. Nothing
+but my extreme stupidity could have rendered me blind so long. Yet,
+whilst you assured me that you had no attachment, I thought we might
+still have lived together.
+
+I shall make no comments on your conduct; or any appeal to the world. Let
+my wrongs sleep with me! Soon, very soon shall I be at peace. When you
+receive this, my burning head will be cold.
+
+I would encounter a thousand deaths, rather than a night like the last.
+Your treatment has thrown my mind into a state of chaos; yet I am serene.
+I go to find comfort, and my only fear is, that my poor body will be
+insulted by an endeavour to recal my hated existence. But I shall plunge
+into the Thames where there is the least chance of my being snatched from
+the death I seek.
+
+God bless you! May you never know by experience what you have made me
+endure. Should your sensibility ever awake, remorse will find its way to
+your heart; and, in the midst of business and sensual pleasure, I shall
+appear before you, the victim of your deviation from rectitude.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXX.
+
+Sunday Morning.
+
+I HAVE only to lament, that, when the bitterness of death was past, I was
+inhumanly brought back to life and misery. But a fixed determination is
+not to be baffled by disappointment; nor will I allow that to be a
+frantic attempt, which was one of the calmest acts of reason. In this
+respect, I am only accountable to myself. Did I care for what is termed
+reputation, it is by other circumstances that I should be dishonoured.
+
+You say, "that you know not how to extricate ourselves out of the
+wretchedness into which we have been plunged." You are extricated long
+since.--But I forbear to comment.----If I am condemned to live longer, it
+is a living death.
+
+It appears to me, that you lay much more stress on delicacy, than on
+principle; for I am unable to discover what sentiment of delicacy would
+have been violated, by your visiting a wretched friend--if indeed you
+have any friendship for me.--But since your new attachment is the only
+thing sacred in your eyes, I am silent--Be happy! My complaints shall
+never more damp your enjoyment--perhaps I am mistaken in supposing that
+even my death could, for more than a moment.--This is what you call
+magnanimity--It is happy for yourself, that you possess this quality in
+the highest degree.
+
+Your continually asserting, that you will do all in your power to
+contribute to my comfort (when you only allude to pecuniary assistance),
+appears to me a flagrant breach of delicacy.--I want not such vulgar
+comfort, nor will I accept it. I never wanted but your heart--That gone,
+you have nothing more to give. Had I only poverty to fear, I should not
+shrink from life.--Forgive me then, if I say, that I shall consider any
+direct or indirect attempt to supply my necessities, as an insult which I
+have not merited--and as rather done out of tenderness for your own
+reputation, than for me. Do not mistake me; I do not think that you value
+money (therefore I will not accept what you do not care for) though I do
+much less, because certain privations are not painful to me. When I am
+dead, respect for yourself will make you take care of the child.
+
+I write with difficulty--probably I shall never write to you
+again.--Adieu!
+
+God bless you!
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXI.
+
+Monday Morning.
+
+I AM compelled at last to say that you treat me ungenerously. I agree
+with you, that--    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+But let the obliquity now fall on me.--I fear neither poverty nor infamy.
+I am unequal to the task of writing--and explanations are not necessary.--
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --    --
+My child may have to blush for her mother's want of prudence--and may
+lament that the rectitude of my heart made me above vulgar precautions;
+but she shall not despise me for meanness.--You are now perfectly
+free.--God bless you.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXIII.
+
+Saturday Night.
+
+I HAVE been hurt by indirect enquiries, which appear to me not to be
+dictated by any tenderness to me.--You ask "If I am well or
+tranquil?"--They who think me so, must want a heart to estimate my
+feelings by.--I chuse then to be the organ of my own sentiments.
+
+I must tell you, that I am very much mortified by your continually
+offering me pecuniary assistance--and, considering your going to the new
+house, as an open avowal that you abandon me, let me tell you that I
+will sooner perish than receive any thing from you--and I say this at the
+moment when I am disappointed in my first attempt to obtain a temporary
+supply. But this even pleases me; an accumulation of disappointments and
+misfortunes seems to suit the habit of my mind.--
+
+Have but a little patience, and I will remove myself where it will not be
+necessary for you to talk--of course, not to think of me. But let me see,
+written by yourself--for I will not receive it through any other
+medium--that the affair is finished.--It is an insult to me to suppose,
+that I can be reconciled, or recover my spirits; but, if you hear nothing
+of me, it will be the same thing to you.
+
+* * * *
+
+Even your seeing me, has been to oblige other people, and not to sooth my
+distracted mind.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXIV.
+
+Thursday Afternoon.
+
+MR. ------ having forgot to desire you to send the things of mine which
+were left at the house, I have to request you to let ------ bring them
+onto ------.
+
+I shall go this evening to the lodging; so you need not be restrained
+from coming here to transact your business.--And, whatever I may think,
+and feel--you need not fear that I shall publicly complain--No! If I
+have any criterion to judge of right and wrong, I have been most
+ungenerously treated: but, wishing now only to hide myself, I shall be
+silent as the grave in which I long to forget myself. I shall protect and
+provide for my child.--I only mean by this to say, that you having
+nothing to fear from my desperation.
+
+Farewel.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXV.
+
+London, November 27.
+
+
+THE letter, without an address, which you put up with the letters you
+returned, did not meet my eyes till just now.--I had thrown the letters
+aside--I did not wish to look over a register of sorrow.
+
+My not having seen it, will account for my having written to you with
+anger--under the impression your departure, without even a line left for
+me, made on me, even after your late conduct, which could not lead me to
+expect much attention to my sufferings.
+
+In fact, "the decided conduct, which appeared to me so unfeeling," has
+almost overturned my reason; my mind is injured--I scarcely know where I
+am, or what I do.--The grief I cannot conquer (for some cruel
+recollections never quit me, banishing almost every other) I labour to
+conceal in total solitude.--My life therefore is but an exercise of
+fortitude, continually on the stretch--and hope never gleams in this
+tomb, where I am buried alive.
+
+But I meant to reason with you, and not to complain.--You tell me, "that
+I shall judge more coolly of your mode of acting, some time hence." But
+is it not possible that _passion_ clouds your reason, as much as it does
+mine?--and ought you not to doubt, whether those principles are so
+"exalted," as you term them, which only lead to your own gratification?
+In other words, whether it be just to have no principle of action, but
+that of following your inclination, trampling on the affection you have
+fostered, and the expectations you have excited?
+
+My affection for you is rooted in my heart.--I know you are not what you
+now seem--nor will you always act, or feel, as you now do, though I may
+never be comforted by the change.--Even at Paris, my image will haunt
+you.--You will see my pale face--and sometimes the tears of anguish will
+drop on your heart, which you have forced from mine.
+
+I cannot write. I thought I could quickly have refuted all your
+_ingenious_ arguments; but my head is confused.--Right or wrong, I am
+miserable!
+
+It seems to me, that my conduct has always been governed by the strictest
+principles of justice and truth.--Yet, how wretched have my social
+feelings, and delicacy of sentiment rendered me!--I have loved with my
+whole soul, only to discover that I had no chance of a return--and that
+existence is a burthen without it.
+
+I do not perfectly understand you.--If, by the offer of your friendship,
+you still only mean pecuniary support--I must again reject it.--Trifling
+are the ills of poverty in the scale of my misfortunes.--God bless you!
+
+* * * *
+
+I have been treated ungenerously--if I understand what is
+generosity.----You seem to me only to have been anxious to shake me
+off--regardless whether you dashed me to atoms by the fall.--In truth I
+have been rudely handled. _Do you judge coolly_, and I trust you will
+not continue to call those capricious feelings "the most refined," which
+would undermine not only the most sacred principles, but the affections
+which unite mankind.----You would render mothers unnatural--and there
+would be no such thing as a father!--If your theory of morals is the most
+"exalted," it is certainly the most easy.--It does not require much
+magnanimity, to determine to please ourselves for the moment, let others
+suffer what they will!
+
+Excuse me for again tormenting you, my heart thirsts for justice from
+you--and whilst I recollect that you approved Miss ------'s conduct--I am
+convinced you will not always justify your own.
+
+Beware of the deceptions of passion! It will not always banish from your
+mind, that you have acted ignobly--and condescended to subterfuge to
+gloss over the conduct you could not excuse.--Do truth and principle
+require such sacrifices?
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXVI.
+
+London, December 8.
+
+HAVING just been informed that ------ is to return immediately to Paris,
+I would not miss a sure opportunity of writing, because I am not certain
+that my last, by Dover has reached you.
+
+Resentment, and even anger, are momentary emotions with me--and I wished
+to tell you so, that if you ever think of me, it may not be in the light
+of an enemy.
+
+That I have not been used _well_ I must ever feel; perhaps, not always
+with the keen anguish I do at present--for I began even now to write
+calmly, and I cannot restrain my tears.
+
+I am stunned!--Your late conduct still appears to me a frightful
+dream.--Ah! ask yourself if you have not condescended to employ a little
+address, I could almost say cunning, unworthy of you?--Principles are
+sacred things--and we never play with truth, with impunity.
+
+The expectation (I have too fondly nourished it) of regaining your
+affection, every day grows fainter and fainter.--Indeed, it seems to me,
+when I am more sad than usual, that I shall never see you more.--Yet you
+will not always forget me.--You will feel something like remorse, for
+having lived only for yourself--and sacrificed my peace to inferior
+gratifications. In a comfortless old age, you will remember that you had
+one disinterested friend, whose heart you wounded to the quick. The hour
+of recollection will come--and you will not be satisfied to act the part
+of a boy, till you fall into that of a dotard. I know that your mind,
+your heart, and your principles of action, are all superior to your
+present conduct. You do, you must, respect me--and you will be sorry to
+forfeit my esteem.
+
+You know best whether I am still preserving the remembrance of an
+imaginary being.--I once thought that I knew you thoroughly--but now I am
+obliged to leave some doubts that involuntarily press on me, to be
+cleared up by time.
+
+You may render me unhappy; but cannot make me contemptible in my own
+eyes.--I shall still be able to support my child, though I am
+disappointed in some other plans of usefulness, which I once believed
+would have afforded you equal pleasure.
+
+Whilst I was with you, I restrained my natural generosity, because I
+thought your property in jeopardy.--When I went to --------, I requested
+you, _if you could conveniently_, not to forget my father, sisters, and
+some other people, whom I was interested about.--Money was lavished away,
+yet not only my requests were neglected, but some trifling debts were not
+discharged, that now come on me.--Was this friendship--or generosity?
+Will you not grant you have forgotten yourself? Still I have an
+affection for you.--God bless you.
+
+* * * *
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXVII.
+
+AS the parting from you for ever is the most serious event of my life, I
+will once expostulate with you, and call not the language of truth and
+feeling ingenuity!
+
+I know the soundness of your understanding--and know that it is
+impossible for you always to confound the caprices of every wayward
+inclination with the manly dictates of principle.
+
+You tell me "that I torment you."--Why do I?----Because you cannot
+estrange your heart entirely from me--and you feel that justice is on my
+side. You urge, "that your conduct was unequivocal."--It was not.--When
+your coolness has hurt me, with what tenderness have you endeavoured to
+remove the impression!--and even before I returned to England, you took
+great pains to convince me, that all my uneasiness was occasioned by the
+effect of a worn-out constitution--and you concluded your letter with
+these words, "Business alone has kept me from you.--Come to any port, and
+I will fly down to my two dear girls with a heart all their own."
+
+With these assurances, is it extraordinary that I should believe what I
+wished? I might--and did think that you had a struggle with old
+propensities; but I still thought that I and virtue should at last
+prevail. I still thought that you had a magnanimity of character, which
+would enable you to conquer yourself.
+
+--------, believe me, it is not romance, you have acknowledged to me
+feelings of this kind.--You could restore me to life and hope, and the
+satisfaction you would feel, would amply repay you.
+
+In tearing myself from you, it is my own heart I pierce--and the time
+will come, when you will lament that you have thrown away a heart, that,
+even in the moment of passion, you cannot despise.--I would owe every
+thing to your generosity--but, for God's sake, keep me no longer in
+suspense!--Let me see you once more!--
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER LXXVIII.
+
+YOU must do as you please with respect to the child.--I could wish that
+it might be done soon, that my name may be no more mentioned to you. It
+is now finished.--Convinced that you have neither regard nor friendship,
+I disdain to utter a reproach, though I have had reason to think, that
+the "forbearance" talked of, has not been very delicate.--It is however
+of no consequence.--I am glad you are satisfied with your own conduct.
+
+I now solemnly assure you, that this is an eternal farewel.--Yet I flinch
+not from the duties which tie me to life.
+
+That there is "sophistry" on one side or other, is certain; but now it
+matters not on which. On my part it has not been a question of words. Yet
+your understanding or mine must be strangely warped--for what you term
+"delicacy," appears to me to be exactly the contrary. I have no criterion
+for morality, and have thought in vain, if the sensations which lead you
+to follow an ancle or step, be the sacred foundation of principle and
+affection. Mine has been of a very different nature, or it would not have
+stood the brunt of your sarcasms.
+
+The sentiment in me is still sacred. If there be any part of me that will
+survive the sense of my misfortunes, it is the purity of my affections.
+The impetuosity of your senses, may have led you to term mere animal
+desire, the source of principle; and it may give zest to some years to
+come.--Whether you will always think so, I shall never know.
+
+It is strange that, in spite of all you do, something like conviction
+forces me to believe, that you are not what you appear to be.
+
+I part with you in peace.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+LETTER
+ON THE
+PRESENT CHARACTER
+OF THE
+FRENCH NATION.
+
+
+LETTER
+
+_Introductory to a Series of Letters on the Present Character of the
+French Nation._
+
+
+Paris, February 15, 1793.
+
+My dear friend,
+
+IT is necessary perhaps for an observer of mankind, to guard as carefully
+the remembrance of the first impression made by a nation, as by a
+countenance; because we imperceptibly lose sight of the national
+character, when we become more intimate with individuals. It is not then
+useless or presumptuous to note, that, when I first entered Paris, the
+striking contrast of riches and poverty, elegance and slovenliness,
+urbanity and deceit, every where caught my eye, and saddened my soul; and
+these impressions are still the foundation of my remarks on the manners,
+which flatter the senses, more than they interest the heart, and yet
+excite more interest than esteem.
+
+The whole mode of life here tends indeed to render the people frivolous,
+and, to borrow their favourite epithet, amiable. Ever on the wing, they
+are always sipping the sparkling joy on the brim of the cup, leaving
+satiety in the bottom for those who venture to drink deep. On all sides
+they trip along, buoyed up by animal spirits, and seemingly so void of
+care, that often, when I am walking on the _Boulevards_, it occurs to me,
+that they alone understand the full import of the term leisure; and they
+trifle their time away with such an air of contentment, I know not how to
+wish them wiser at the expence of their gaiety. They play before me like
+motes in a sunbeam, enjoying the passing ray; whilst an English head,
+searching for more solid happiness, loses, in the analysis of pleasure,
+the volatile sweets of the moment. Their chief enjoyment, it is true,
+rises from vanity: but it is not the vanity that engenders vexation of
+spirit; on the contrary, it lightens the heavy burthen of life, which
+reason too often weighs, merely to shift from one shoulder to the other.
+
+Investigating the modification of the passion, as I would analyze the
+elements that give a form to dead matter, I shall attempt to trace to
+their source the causes which have combined to render this nation the
+most polished, in a physical sense, and probably the most superficial in
+the world; and I mean to follow the windings of the various streams that
+disembogue into a terrific gulf, in which all the dignity of our nature
+is absorbed. For every thing has conspired to make the French the most
+sensual people in the world; and what can render the heart so hard, or so
+effectually stifle every moral emotion, as the refinements of sensuality?
+
+The frequent repetition of the word French, appears invidious; let me
+then make a previous observation, which I beg you not to lose sight of,
+when I speak rather harshly of a land flowing with milk and honey.
+Remember that it is not the morals of a particular people that I would
+decry; for are we not all of the same stock? But I wish calmly to
+consider the stage of civilization in which I find the French, and,
+giving a sketch of their character, and unfolding the circumstances which
+have produced its identity, I shall endeavour to throw some light on the
+history of man, and on the present important subjects of discussion.
+
+I would I could first inform you that, out of the chaos of vices and
+follies, prejudices and virtues, rudely jumbled together, I saw the fair
+form of Liberty slowly rising, and Virtue expanding her wings to shelter
+all her children! I should then hear the account of the barbarities that
+have rent the bosom of France patiently, and bless the firm hand that
+lopt off the rotten limbs. But, if the aristocracy of birth is levelled
+with the ground, only to make room for that of riches, I am afraid that
+the morals of the people will not be much improved by the change, or the
+government rendered less venal. Still it is not just to dwell on the
+misery produced by the present struggle, without adverting to the
+standing evils of the old system. I am grieved--sorely grieved--when I
+think of the blood that has stained the cause of freedom at Paris; but I
+also hear the same live stream cry aloud from the highways, through which
+the retreating armies passed with famine and death in their rear, and I
+hide my face with awe before the inscrutable ways of providence, sweeping
+in such various directions the besom of destruction over the sons of men.
+
+Before I came to France, I cherished, you know, an opinion, that strong
+virtues might exist with the polished manners produced by the progress
+of civilization; and I even anticipated the epoch, when, in the course of
+improvement, men would labour to become virtuous, without being goaded on
+by misery. But now, the perspective of the golden age, fading before the
+attentive eye of observation, almost eludes my sight; and, losing thus in
+part my theory of a more perfect state, start not, my friend, if I bring
+forward an opinion, which at the first glance seems to be levelled
+against the existence of God! I am not become an Atheist, I assure you,
+by residing at Paris: yet I begin to fear that vice, or, if you will,
+evil, is the grand mobile of action, and that, when the passions are
+justly poized, we become harmless, and in the same proportion useless.
+
+The wants of reason are very few; and, were we to consider
+dispassionately the real value of most things, we should probably rest
+satisfied with the simple gratification of our physical necessities, and
+be content with negative goodness: for it is frequently, only that
+wanton, the Imagination, with her artful coquetry, who lures us forward,
+and makes us run over a rough road, pushing aside every obstacle merely
+to catch a disappointment.
+
+The desire also of being useful to others, is continually damped by
+experience; and, if the exertions of humanity were not in some measure
+their own reward, who would endure misery, or struggle with care, to make
+some people ungrateful, and others idle?
+
+You will call these melancholy effusions, and guess that, fatigued by
+the vivacity, which has all the bustling folly of childhood, without the
+innocence which renders ignorance charming, I am too severe in my
+strictures. It may be so; and I am aware that the good effects of the
+revolution will be last felt at Paris; where surely the soul of Epicurus
+has long been at work to root out the simple emotions of the heart,
+which, being natural, are always moral. Rendered cold and artificial by
+the selfish enjoyments of the senses, which the government fostered, is
+it surprising that simplicity of manners, and singleness of heart, rarely
+appear, to recreate me with the wild odour of nature, so passing sweet?
+
+Seeing how deep the fibres of mischief have shot, I sometimes ask, with a
+doubting accent, Whether a nation can go back to the purity of manners
+which has hitherto been maintained unsullied only by the keen air of
+poverty, when, emasculated by pleasure, the luxuries of prosperity are
+become the wants of nature? I cannot yet give up the hope, that a fairer
+day is dawning on Europe, though I must hesitatingly observe, that little
+is to be expected from the narrow principle of commerce which seems every
+where to be shoving aside _the point of honour_ of the _noblesse_. I can
+look beyond the evils of the moment, and do not expect muddied water to
+become clear before it has had time to stand; yet, even for the moment,
+it is the most terrific of all sights, to see men vicious without
+warmth--to see the order that should be the superscription of virtue,
+cultivated to give security to crimes which only thoughtlessness could
+palliate. Disorder is, in fact, the very essence of vice, though with the
+wild wishes of a corrupt fancy humane emotions often kindly mix to soften
+their atrocity. Thus humanity, generosity, and even self-denial,
+sometimes render a character grand, and even useful, when hurried away by
+lawless passions; but what can equal the turpitude of a cold calculator
+who lives for himself alone, and considering his fellow-creatures merely
+as machines of pleasure, never forgets that honesty is the best policy?
+Keeping ever within the pale of the law, he crushes his thousands with
+impunity; but it is with that degree of management, which makes him, to
+borrow a significant vulgarism, a villain _in grain_. The very excess of
+his depravation preserves him, whilst the more respectable beast of prey,
+who prowls about like the lion, and roars to announce his approach,
+falls into a snare.
+
+You may think it too soon to form an opinion of the future government,
+yet it is impossible to avoid hazarding some conjectures, when every
+thing whispers me, that names, not principles, are changed, and when I
+see that the turn of the tide has left the dregs of the old system to
+corrupt the new. For the same pride of office, the same desire of power
+are still visible; with this aggravation, that, fearing to return to
+obscurity after having but just acquired a relish for distinction, each
+hero, or philosopher, for all are dubbed with these new titles,
+endeavours to make hay while the sun shines; and every petty municipal
+officer, become the idol, or rather the tyrant of the day, stalks like a
+cock on a dunghil.
+
+I shall now conclude this desultory letter; which however will enable you
+to foresee that I shall treat more of morals than manners.
+
+Yours ------
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+
+
+FRAGMENT
+OF
+LETTERS
+ON THE
+MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+Introductory Letter.
+LETTER II. Management of the Mother during pregnancy: bathing.
+LETTER III. Lying-in.
+LETTER IV. The first month: diet: clothing.
+LETTER V. The three following months.
+LETTER VI. The remainder of the first year.
+LETTER VII. The second year, &c: conclusion.
+
+
+LETTERS ON THE MANAGEMENT OF INFANTS.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER I.
+
+I OUGHT to apologize for not having written to you on the subject you
+mentioned; but, to tell you the truth, it grew upon me: and, instead of
+an answer, I have begun a series of letters on the management of children
+in their infancy. Replying then to your question, I have the public in
+my thoughts, and shall endeavour to show what modes appear to me
+necessary, to render the infancy of children more healthy and happy. I
+have long thought, that the cause which renders children as hard to rear
+as the most fragile plant, is our deviation from simplicity. I know that
+some able physicians have recommended the method I have pursued, and I
+mean to point out the good effects I have observed in practice. I am
+aware that many matrons will exclaim against me, and dwell on the number
+of children they have brought up, as their mothers did before them,
+without troubling themselves with new-fangled notions; yet, though, in my
+uncle Toby's words, they should attempt to silence me, by "wishing I had
+seen their large" families, I must suppose, while a third part of the
+human species, according to the most accurate calculation, die during
+their infancy, just at the threshold of life, that there is some error in
+the modes adopted by mothers and nurses, which counteracts their own
+endeavours. I may be mistaken in some particulars; for general rules,
+founded on the soundest reason, demand individual modification; but, if I
+can persuade any of the rising generation to exercise their reason on
+this head, I am content. My advice will probably be found most useful to
+mothers in the middle class; and it is from them that the lower
+imperceptibly gains improvement. Custom, produced by reason in one, may
+safely be the effect of imitation in the other.--    --    --
+--    --    --    --    --    --
+
+
+
+
+LETTERS
+TO
+Mr. JOHNSON,
+_BOOKSELLER_,
+IN
+ST. PAUL'S CHURCH-YARD.
+
+
+LETTERS
+TO
+Mr. JOHNSON.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+
+LETTER I.
+
+Dublin, April 14, [1787.]
+
+Dear sir,
+
+I AM still an invalid--and begin to believe that I ought never to expect
+to enjoy health. My mind preys on my body--and, when I endeavour to be
+useful, I grow too much interested for my own peace. Confined almost
+entirely to the society of children, I am anxiously solicitous for their
+future welfare, and mortified beyond measure, when counteracted in my
+endeavours to improve them.--I feel all a mother's fears for the swarm of
+little ones which surround me, and observe disorders, without having
+power to apply the proper remedies. How can I be reconciled to life, when
+it is always a painful warfare, and when I am deprived of all the
+pleasures I relish?--I allude to rational conversations, and domestic
+affections. Here, alone, a poor solitary individual in a strange land,
+tied to one spot, and subject to the caprice of another, can I be
+contented? I am desirous to convince you that I have _some_ cause for
+sorrow--and am not without reason detached from life. I shall hope to
+hear that you are well, and am yours sincerely
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER II.
+
+Henley, Thursday, Sept 13.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+SINCE I saw you, I have, literally speaking, _enjoyed_ solitude. My
+sister could not accompany me in my rambles; I therefore wandered alone,
+by the side of the Thames, and in the neighbouring beautiful fields and
+pleasure grounds: the prospects were of such a placid kind, I _caught_
+tranquillity while I surveyed them--my mind was _still_, though active.
+Were I to give you an account how I have spent my time, you would
+smile.--I found an old French bible here, and amused myself with
+comparing it with our English translation; then I would listen to the
+falling leaves, or observe the various tints the autumn gave to them--At
+other times, the singing of a robin, or the noise of a water-mill,
+engaged my attention--partial attention--, for I was, at the same time
+perhaps discussing some knotty point, or straying from this _tiny_ world
+to new systems. After these excursions, I returned to the family meals,
+told the children stories (they think me _vastly_ agreeable), and my
+sister was amused.--Well, will you allow me to call this way of passing
+my days pleasant?
+
+I was just going to mend my pen; but I believe it will enable me to say
+all I have to add to this epistle. Have you yet heard of an habitation
+for me? I often think of my new plan of life; and, lest my sister should
+try to prevail on me to alter it, I have avoided mentioning it to her. I
+am determined!--Your sex generally laugh at female determinations; but
+let me tell you, I never yet resolved to do, any thing of consequence,
+that I did not adhere resolutely to it, till I had accomplished my
+purpose, improbable as it might have appeared to a more timid mind. In
+the course of near nine-and-twenty years, I have gathered some
+experience, and felt many _severe_ disappointments--and what is the
+amount? I long for a little peace and _independence_! Every obligation we
+receive from our fellow-creatures is a new shackle, takes from our native
+freedom, and debases the mind, makes us mere earthworms--I am not fond of
+grovelling!
+
+I am, sir, yours, &c.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER III.
+
+Market Harborough, Sept. 20.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+YOU left me with three opulent tradesmen; their conversation was not
+calculated to beguile the way, when the sable curtain concealed the
+beauties of nature. I listened to the tricks of trade--and shrunk away,
+without wishing to grow rich; even the novelty of the subjects did not
+render them pleasing; fond as I am of tracing the passions in all their
+different forms--I was not surprised by any glimpse of the sublime, or
+beautiful--though one of them imagined I would be a useful partner in a
+good _firm_. I was very much fatigued, and have scarcely recovered
+myself. I do not expect to enjoy the same tranquil pleasures Henley
+afforded: I meet with new objects to employ my mind; but many painful
+emotions are complicated with the reflections they give rise to.
+
+I do not intend to enter on the _old_ topic, yet hope to hear from
+you--and am yours, &c.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IV.
+
+Friday Night.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+THOUGH your remarks are generally judicious--I cannot _now_ concur with
+you, I mean with respect to the preface[67-A], and have not altered it.
+I hate the usual smooth way of exhibiting proud humility. A general rule
+_only_ extends to the majority--and, believe me, the few judicious
+parents who may peruse my book, will not feel themselves hurt--and the
+weak are too vain to mind what is said in a book intended for children.
+
+I return you the Italian MS.--but do not hastily imagine that I am
+indolent. I would not spare any labour to do my duty--and, after the most
+laborious day, that single thought would solace me more than any
+pleasures the senses could enjoy. I find I could not translate the MS.
+well. If it was not a MS, I should not be so easily intimidated; but the
+hand, and errors in orthography, or abbreviations, are a stumbling-block
+at the first setting out.--I cannot bear to do any thing I cannot do
+well--and I should lose time in the vain attempt.
+
+I had, the other day, the satisfaction of again receiving a letter from
+my poor, dear Margaret[69-A].--With all a mother's fondness I could
+transcribe a part of it--She says, every day her affection to me, and
+dependence on heaven increase, &c.--I miss her innocent caresses--and
+sometimes indulge a pleasing hope, that she may be allowed to cheer my
+childless age--if I am to live to be old.--At any rate, I may hear of the
+virtues I may not contemplate--and my reason may permit me to love a
+female.--I now allude to ------. I have received another letter from her,
+and her childish complaints vex me--indeed they do--As usual, good-night.
+
+MARY.
+
+If parents attended to their children, I would not have written the
+stories; for, what are books--compared to conversations which affection
+inforces!--
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER V.
+
+My dear sir,
+
+REMEMBER you are to settle _my account_, as I want to know how much I am
+in your debt--but do not suppose that I feel any uneasiness on that
+score. The generality of people in trade would not be much obliged to me
+for a like civility, _but you were a man_ before you were a
+bookseller--so I am your sincere friend,
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VI.
+
+Friday Morning.
+
+I AM sick with vexation--and wish I could knock my foolish head against
+the wall, that bodily pain might make me feel less anguish from
+self-reproach! To say the truth, I was never more displeased with myself,
+and I will tell you the cause.--You may recollect that I did not mention
+to you the circumstance of ------ having a fortune left to him; nor did a
+hint of it drop from me when I conversed with my sister; because I knew
+he had a sufficient motive for concealing it. Last Sunday, when his
+character was aspersed, as I thought, unjustly, in the heat of
+vindication I informed ****** that he was now independent; but, at the
+same time, desired him not to repeat my information to B----; yet, last
+Tuesday, he told him all--and the boy at B----'s gave Mrs. ------ an
+account of it. As Mr. ------ knew he had only made a confident of me (I
+blush to think of it!) he guessed the channel of intelligence, and this
+morning came (not to reproach me, I wish he had!) but to point out the
+injury I have done him.--Let what will be the consequence, I will
+reimburse him, if I deny myself the necessaries of life--and even then my
+folly will sting me.--Perhaps you can scarcely conceive the misery I at
+this moment endure--that I, whose power of doing good is so limited,
+should do harm, galls my very soul. ****** may laugh at these
+qualms--but, supposing Mr. ------ to be unworthy, I am not the less to
+blame. Surely it is hell to despise one's self!--I did not want this
+additional vexation--at this time I have many that hang heavily on my
+spirits. I shall not call on you this month--nor stir out.--My stomach
+has been so suddenly and violently affected, I am unable to lean over the
+desk.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VII.
+
+AS I am become a reviewer, I think it right, in the way of business, to
+consider the subject. You have alarmed the editor of the Critical, as the
+advertisement prefixed to the Appendix plainly shows. The Critical
+appears to me to be a timid, mean production, and its success is a
+reflection on the taste and judgment of the public; but, as a body, who
+ever gave it credit for much? The voice of the people is only the voice
+of truth, when some man of abilities has had time to get fast hold of the
+GREAT NOSE of the monster. Of course, local fame is generally a clamour,
+and dies away. The Appendix to the Monthly afforded me more amusement,
+though every article almost wants energy and a _cant_ of virtue and
+liberality is strewed over it; always tame, and eager to pay court to
+established fame. The account of Necker is one unvaried tone of
+admiration. Surely men were born only to provide for the sustenance of
+the body by enfeebling the mind!
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER VIII.
+
+YOU made me very low-spirited last night, by your manner of talking.--You
+are my only friend--the only person I am _intimate_ with.--I never had a
+father, or a brother--you have been both to me, ever since I knew
+you--yet I have sometimes been very petulant.--I have been thinking of
+those instances of ill-humour and quickness, and they appeared like
+crimes.
+
+Yours sincerely
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER IX.
+
+Saturday Night.
+
+I AM a mere animal, and instinctive emotions too often silence the
+suggestions of reason. Your note--I can scarcely tell why, hurt me--and
+produced a kind of winterly smile, which diffuses a beam of despondent
+tranquillity over the features. I have been very ill--Heaven knows it was
+more than fancy--After some sleepless, wearisome nights, towards the
+morning I have grown delirious.--Last Thursday, in particular, I imagined
+------ was thrown into great distress by his folly; and I, unable to
+assist him, was in an agony. My nerves were in such a painful state of
+irritation--I suffered more than I can express--Society was
+necessary--and might have diverted me till I gained more strength; but I
+blushed when I recollected how often I had teazed you with childish
+complaints, and the reveries of a disordered imagination. I even
+_imagined_ that I intruded on you, because you never called on me--though
+you perceived that I was not well.--I have nourished a sickly kind of
+delicacy, which gives me many unnecessary pangs.--I acknowledge that life
+is but a jest--and often a frightful dream--yet catch myself every day
+searching for something serious--and feel real misery from the
+disappointment. I am a strange compound of weakness and resolution!
+However, if I must suffer, I will endeavour to suffer in silence. There
+is certainly a great defect in my mind--my wayward heart creates its own
+misery--Why I am made thus I cannot tell; and, till I can form some idea
+of the whole of my existence, I must be content to weep and dance like a
+child--long for a toy, and be tired of it as soon as I get it.
+
+We must each of us wear a fool's cap; but mine, alas! has lost its bells,
+and is grown so heavy, I find it intolerably troublesome.----Good-night!
+I have been pursuing a number of strange thoughts since I began to write,
+and have actually both wept and laughed immoderately--Surely I am a
+fool--
+
+MARY W.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER X.
+
+Monday Morning.
+
+I REALLY want a German grammar, as I intend to attempt to learn that
+language--and I will tell you the reason why.--While I live, I am
+persuaded, I must exert my understanding to procure an independence, and
+render myself useful. To make the task easier, I ought to store my mind
+with knowledge--The seed time is passing away. I see the necessity of
+labouring now--and of that necessity I do not complain; on the contrary,
+I am thankful that I have more than common incentives to pursue
+knowledge, and draw my pleasures from the employments that are within my
+reach. You perceive this is not a gloomy day--I feel at this moment
+particularly grateful to you--without your humane and _delicate_
+assistance, how many obstacles should I not have had to encounter--too
+often should I have been out of patience with my fellow-creatures, whom I
+wish to love!--Allow me to love you, my dear sir, and call friend a being
+I respect.--Adieu!
+
+MARY W.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XI.
+
+I THOUGHT you _very_ unkind, nay, very unfeeling, last night. My cares
+and vexations--I will say what I allow myself to think--do me honour, as
+they arise from my disinterestedness and _unbending_ principles; nor can
+that mode of conduct be a reflection on my understanding, which enables
+me to bear misery, rather than selfishly live for myself alone. I am not
+the only character deserving of respect, that has had to struggle with
+various sorrows--while inferior minds have enjoyed local fame and present
+comfort.--Dr. Johnson's cares almost drove him mad--but, I suppose, you
+would quietly have told him, he was a fool for not being calm, and that
+wise men striving against the stream, can yet be in good humour. I have
+done with insensible human wisdom,--"indifference cold in wisdom's
+guise,"--and turn to the source of perfection--who perhaps never
+disregarded an almost broken heart, especially when a respect, a
+practical respect, for virtue, sharpened the wounds of adversity. I am
+ill--I stayed in bed this morning till eleven o'clock, only thinking of
+getting money to extricate myself out of some of my difficulties--The
+struggle is now over. I will condescend to try to obtain some in a
+disagreeable way.
+
+Mr. ------ called on me just now--pray did you know his motive for
+calling[82-A]?--I think him impertinently officious.--He had left the
+house before it occurred to me in the strong light it does now, or I
+should have told him so--My poverty makes me proud--I will not be
+insulted by a superficial puppy.--His intimacy with Miss ------ gave him
+a privilege, which he should not have assumed with me--a proposal might
+be made to his cousin, a milliner's girl, which should not have been
+mentioned to me. Pray tell him that I am offended--and do not wish to see
+him again!--When I meet him at your house, I shall leave the room, since
+I cannot pull him by the nose. I can force my spirit to leave my
+body--but it shall never bend to support that body--God of heaven, save
+thy child from this living death!--I scarcely know what I write. My hand
+trembles--I am very sick--sick at heart.----
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XII.
+
+Tuesday Evening.
+
+Sir,
+
+WHEN you left me this morning, and I reflected a moment--your _officious_
+message, which at first appeared to me a joke--looked so very like an
+insult--I cannot forget it--To prevent then the necessity of forcing a
+smile--when I chance to meet you--I take the earliest opportunity of
+informing you of my real sentiments.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIII.
+
+Wednesday, 3 o'clock.
+
+Sir,
+
+IT is inexpressibly disagreeable to me to be obliged to enter again on a
+subject, that has already raised a tumult of _indignant_ emotions in my
+bosom, which I was labouring to suppress when I received your letter. I
+shall now _condescend_ to answer your epistle; but let me first tell you,
+that, in my _unprotected_ situation, I make a point of never forgiving a
+_deliberate insult_--and in that light I consider your late officious
+conduct. It is not according to my nature to mince matters--I will then
+tell you in plain terms, what I think. I have ever considered you in the
+light of a _civil_ acquaintance--on the word friend I lay a peculiar
+emphasis--and, as a mere acquaintance, you were rude and _cruel_, to step
+forward to insult a woman, whose conduct and misfortunes demand respect.
+If my friend, Mr. Johnson, had made the proposal--I should have been
+severely hurt--have thought him unkind and unfeeling, but not
+_impertinent_.--The privilege of intimacy you had no claim to--and should
+have referred the man to myself--if you had not sufficient discernment to
+quash it at once. I am, sir, poor and destitute.--Yet I have a spirit
+that will never bend, or take indirect methods, to obtain the consequence
+I despise; nay, if to support life it was necessary to act contrary to my
+principles, the struggle would soon be over. I can bear any thing but my
+own contempt.
+
+In a few words, what I call an insult, is the bare supposition that I
+could for a moment think of _prostituting_ my person for a maintenance;
+for in that point of view does such a marriage appear to me, who consider
+right and wrong in the abstract, and never by words and local opinions
+shield myself from the reproaches of my own heart and understanding.
+
+It is needless to say more--Only you must excuse me when I add, that I
+wish never to see, but as a perfect stranger, a person who could so
+grossly mistake my character. An apology is not necessary--if you were
+inclined to make one--nor any further expostulations.--I again repeat, I
+cannot overlook an affront; few indeed have sufficient delicacy to
+respect poverty, even where it gives lustre to a character--and I tell
+you sir, I am POOR--yet can live without your benevolent exertions.
+
+MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XIV.
+
+I SEND you _all_ the books I had to review except Dr. J--'s Sermons,
+which I have begun. If you wish me to look over any more trash this
+month--you must send it directly. I have been so low-spirited since I saw
+you--I was quite glad, last night, to feel myself affected by some
+passages in Dr. J--'s sermon on the death of his wife--I seemed
+(suddenly) to _find_ my _soul_ again--It has been for some time I cannot
+tell where. Send me the Speaker--and _Mary_, I want one--and I shall soon
+want some paper--you may as well send it at the same time--for I am
+trying to brace my nerves that I may be industrious.--I am afraid reason
+is not a good bracer--for I have been reasoning a long time with my
+untoward spirits--and yet my hand trembles.--I could finish a period very
+_prettily_ now, by saying that it ought to be steady when I add that I am
+yours sincerely,
+
+MARY.
+
+If you do not like the manner in which I reviewed Dr. J--'s s---- on his
+wife, be it known unto you--I _will_ not do it any other way--I felt some
+pleasure in paying a just tribute of respect to the memory of a
+man--who, spite of his faults, I have an affection for--I say _have_, for
+I believe he is somewhere--_where_ my soul has been gadding perhaps;--but
+_you_ do not live on conjectures.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XV.
+
+MY dear sir, I send you a chapter which I am pleased with, now I see it
+in one point of view--and, as I have made free with the author, I hope
+you will not have often to say--what does this mean?
+
+You forgot you were to make out my account--I am, of course, over head
+and ears in debt; but I have not that kind of pride, which makes some
+dislike to be obliged to those they respect.--On the contrary, when I
+involuntarily lament that I have not a father or brother, I thankfully
+recollect that I have received unexpected kindness from you and a few
+others.--So reason allows, what nature impels me to--for I cannot live
+without loving my fellow-creatures--nor can I love them, without
+discovering some virtue.
+
+MARY.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+LETTER XVI.
+
+Paris, December 26, 1792.
+
+I SHOULD immediately on the receipt of your letter, my dear friend, have
+thanked you for your punctuality, for it highly gratified me, had I not
+wished to wait till I could tell you that this day was not stained with
+blood. Indeed the prudent precautions taken by the National Convention to
+prevent a tumult, made me suppose that the dogs of faction would not dare
+to bark, much less to bite, however true to their scent; and I was not
+mistaken; for the citizens, who were all called out, are returning home
+with composed countenances, shouldering their arms. About nine o'clock
+this morning, the king passed by my window, moving silently along
+(excepting now and then a few strokes on the drum, which rendered the
+stillness more awful) through empty streets, surrounded by the national
+guards, who, clustering round the carriage, seemed to deserve their name.
+The inhabitants flocked to their windows, but the casements were all
+shut, not a voice was heard, nor did I see any thing like an insulting
+gesture.--For the first time since I entered France, I bowed to the
+majesty of the people, and respected the propriety of behaviour so
+perfectly in unison with my own feelings. I can scarcely tell you why,
+but an association of ideas made the tears flow insensibly from my eyes,
+when I saw Louis sitting, with more dignity than I expected from his
+character, in a hackney coach, going to meet death, where so many of his
+race have triumphed. My fancy instantly brought Louis XIV before me,
+entering the capital with all his pomp, after one of the victories most
+flattering to his pride, only to see the sunshine of prosperity
+overshadowed by the sublime gloom of misery. I have been alone ever
+since; and, though my mind is calm, I cannot dismiss the lively images
+that have filled my imagination all the day.--Nay, do not smile, but pity
+me; for, once or twice, lifting my eyes from the paper, I have seen eyes
+glare through a glass-door opposite my chair and bloody hands shook at
+me. Not the distant sound of a footstep can I hear.--My apartments are
+remote from those of the servants, the only persons who sleep with me in
+an immense hotel, one folding door opening after another.--I wish I had
+even kept the cat with me!--I want to see something alive; death in so
+many frightful shapes has taken hold of my fancy.--I am going to
+bed--and, for the first time in my life, I cannot put out the candle.
+
+M. W.
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[67-A] To Original Stories.
+
+[69-A] Countess Mount Cashel.
+
+[82-A] This alludes to a foolish proposal of marriage for mercenary
+considerations, which the gentleman here mentioned thought proper to
+recommend to her. The two letters which immediately follow, are addressed
+to the gentleman himself.
+
+
+
+
+EXTRACT
+
+OF THE
+
+CAVE OF FANCY.
+
+A TALE.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+[_Begun to be written in the year 1787, but never completed_]
+
+
+CAVE OF FANCY.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. I.
+
+
+YE who expect constancy where every thing is changing, and peace in the
+midst of tumult, attend to the voice of experience, and mark in time the
+footsteps of disappointment, or life will be lost in desultory wishes,
+and death arrive before the dawn of wisdom.
+
+In a sequestered valley, surrounded by rocky mountains that intercepted
+many of the passing clouds, though sunbeams variegated their ample sides,
+lived a sage, to whom nature had unlocked her most hidden secrets. His
+hollow eyes, sunk in their orbits, retired from the view of vulgar
+objects, and turned inwards, overleaped the boundary prescribed to human
+knowledge. Intense thinking during fourscore and ten years, had whitened
+the scattered locks on his head, which, like the summit of the distant
+mountain, appeared to be bound by an eternal frost.
+
+On the sandy waste behind the mountains, the track of ferocious beasts
+might be traced, and sometimes the mangled limbs which they left,
+attracted a hovering flight of birds of prey. An extensive wood the sage
+had forced to rear its head in a soil by no means congenial, and the firm
+trunks of the trees seemed to frown with defiance on time; though the
+spoils of innumerable summers covered the roots, which resembled fangs;
+so closely did they cling to the unfriendly sand, where serpents hissed,
+and snakes, rolling out their vast folds, inhaled the noxious vapours.
+The ravens and owls who inhabited the solitude, gave also a thicker gloom
+to the everlasting twilight, and the croaking of the former a monotony,
+in unison with the gloom; whilst lions and tygers, shunning even this
+faint semblance of day, sought the dark caverns, and at night, when they
+shook off sleep, their roaring would make the whole valley resound,
+confounded with the screechings of the bird of night.
+
+One mountain rose sublime, towering above all, on the craggy sides of
+which a few sea-weeds grew, washed by the ocean, that with tumultuous
+roar rushed to assault, and even undermine, the huge barrier that stopped
+its progress; and ever and anon a ponderous mass, loosened from the
+cliff, to which it scarcely seemed to adhere, always threatening to fall,
+fell into the flood, rebounding as it fell, and the sound was re-echoed
+from rock to rock. Look where you would, all was without form, as if
+nature, suddenly stopping her hand, had left chaos a retreat.
+
+Close to the most remote side of it was the sage's abode. It was a rude
+hut, formed of stumps of trees and matted twigs, to secure him from the
+inclemency of the weather; only through small apertures crossed with
+rushes, the wind entered in wild murmurs, modulated by these
+obstructions. A clear spring broke out of the middle of the adjacent
+rock, which, dropping slowly into a cavity it had hollowed, soon
+overflowed, and then ran, struggling to free itself from the cumbrous
+fragments, till, become a deep, silent stream, it escaped through reeds,
+and roots of trees, whose blasted tops overhung and darkened the current.
+
+One side of the hut was supported by the rock, and at midnight, when the
+sage struck the inclosed part, it yawned wide, and admitted him into a
+cavern in the very bowels of the earth, where never human foot before had
+trod; and the various spirits, which inhabit the different regions of
+nature, were here obedient to his potent word. The cavern had been formed
+by the great inundation of waters, when the approach of a comet forced
+them from their source; then, when the fountains of the great deep were
+broken up, a stream rushed out of the centre of the earth, where the
+spirits, who have lived on it, are confined to purify themselves from
+the dross contracted in their first stage of existence; and it flowed in
+black waves, for ever bubbling along the cave, the extent of which had
+never been explored. From the sides and top, water distilled, and,
+petrifying as it fell, took fantastic shapes, that soon divided it into
+apartments, if so they might be called. In the foam, a wearied spirit
+would sometimes rise, to catch the most distant glimpse of light, or
+taste the vagrant breeze, which the yawning of the rock admitted, when
+Sagestus, for that was the name of the hoary sage, entered. Some, who
+were refined and almost cleared from vicious spots, he would allow to
+leave, for a limited time, their dark prison-house; and, flying on the
+winds across the bleak northern ocean, or rising in an exhalation till
+they reached a sun-beam, they thus re-visited the haunts of men. These
+were the guardian angels, who in soft whispers restrain the vicious, and
+animate the wavering wretch who stands suspended between virtue and vice.
+
+Sagestus had spent a night in the cavern, as he often did, and he left
+the silent vestibule of the grave, just as the sun, emerging from the
+ocean, dispersed the clouds, which were not half so dense as those he had
+left. All that was human in him rejoiced at the sight of reviving life,
+and he viewed with pleasure the mounting sap rising to expand the herbs,
+which grew spontaneously in this wild--when, turning his eyes towards the
+sea, he found that death had been at work during his absence, and
+terrific marks of a furious storm still spread horror around. Though the
+day was serene, and threw bright rays on eyes for ever shut, it dawned
+not for the wretches who hung pendent on the craggy rocks, or were
+stretched lifeless on the sand. Some, struggling, had dug themselves a
+grave; others had resigned their breath before the impetuous surge
+whirled them on shore. A few, in whom the vital spark was not so soon
+dislodged, had clung to loose fragments; it was the grasp of death;
+embracing the stone, they stiffened; and the head, no longer erect,
+rested on the mass which the arms encircled. It felt not the agonizing
+gripe, nor heard the sigh that broke the heart in twain.
+
+Resting his chin on an oaken club, the sage looked on every side, to see
+if he could discern any who yet breathed. He drew nearer, and thought he
+saw, at the first glance, the unclosed eyes glare; but soon perceived
+that they were a mere glassy substance, mute as the tongue; the jaws were
+fallen, and, in some of the tangled locks, hands were clinched; nay, even
+the nails had entered sharpened by despair. The blood flew rapidly to his
+heart; it was flesh; he felt he was still a man, and the big tear paced
+down his iron cheeks, whose muscles had not for a long time been relaxed
+by such humane emotions. A moment he breathed quick, then heaved a sigh,
+and his wonted calm returned with an unaccustomed glow of tenderness; for
+the ways of heaven were not hid from him; he lifted up his eyes to the
+common Father of nature, and all was as still in his bosom, as the smooth
+deep, after having closed over the huge vessel from which the wretches
+had fled.
+
+Turning round a part of the rock that jutted out, meditating on the ways
+of Providence, a weak infantine voice reached his ears; it was lisping
+out the name of mother. He looked, and beheld a blooming child leaning
+over, and kissing with eager fondness, lips that were insensible to the
+warm pressure. Starting at the sight of the sage, she fixed her eyes on
+him, "Wake her, ah! wake her," she cried, "or the sea will catch us."
+Again he felt compassion, for he saw that the mother slept the sleep of
+death. He stretched out his hand, and, smoothing his brow, invited her to
+approach; but she still intreated him to wake her mother, whom she
+continued to call, with an impatient tremulous voice. To detach her from
+the body by persuasion would not have been very easy. Sagestus had a
+quicker method to effect his purpose; he took out a box which contained a
+soporific powder, and as soon as the fumes reached her brain, the powers
+of life were suspended.
+
+He carried her directly to his hut, and left her sleeping profoundly on
+his rushy couch.
+
+
+
+
+CHAP. II.
+
+
+AGAIN Sagestus approached the dead, to view them with a more scrutinizing
+eye. He was perfectly acquainted with the construction of the human body,
+knew the traces that virtue or vice leaves on the whole frame; they were
+now indelibly fixed by death; nay more, he knew by the shape of the solid
+structure, how far the spirit could range, and saw the barrier beyond
+which it could not pass: the mazes of fancy he explored, measured the
+stretch of thought, and, weighing all in an even balance, could tell whom
+nature had stamped an hero, a poet, or philosopher.
+
+By their appearance, at a transient glance, he knew that the vessel must
+have contained many passengers, and that some of them were above the
+vulgar, with respect to fortune and education; he then walked leisurely
+among the dead, and narrowly observed their pallid features.
+
+His eye first rested on a form in which proportion reigned, and, stroking
+back the hair, a spacious forehead met his view; warm fancy had revelled
+there, and her airy dance had left vestiges, scarcely visible to a mortal
+eye. Some perpendicular lines pointed out that melancholy had
+predominated in his constitution; yet the straggling hairs of his
+eye-brows showed that anger had often shook his frame; indeed, the four
+temperatures, like the four elements, had resided in this little world,
+and produced harmony. The whole visage was bony, and an energetic frown
+had knit the flexible skin of his brow; the kingdom within had been
+extensive; and the wild creations of fancy had there "a local habitation
+and a name." So exquisite was his sensibility, so quick his
+comprehension, that he perceived various combinations in an instant; he
+caught truth as she darted towards him, saw all her fair proportion at a
+glance, and the flash of his eye spoke the quick senses which conveyed
+intelligence to his mind; the sensorium indeed was capacious, and the
+sage imagined he saw the lucid beam, sparkling with love or ambition, in
+characters of fire, which a graceful curve of the upper eyelid shaded.
+The lips were a little deranged by contempt; and a mixture of vanity and
+self-complacency formed a few irregular lines round them. The chin had
+suffered from sensuality, yet there were still great marks of vigour in
+it, as if advanced with stern dignity. The hand accustomed to command,
+and even tyrannize, was unnerved; but its appearance convinced Sagestus,
+that he had oftener wielded a thought than a weapon; and that he had
+silenced, by irresistible conviction, the superficial disputant, and the
+being, who doubted because he had not strength to believe, who, wavering
+between different borrowed opinions, first caught at one straw, then at
+another, unable to settle into any consistency of character. After gazing
+a few moments, Sagestus turned away exclaiming, How are the stately oaks
+torn up by a tempest, and the bow unstrung, that could force the arrow
+beyond the ken of the eye!
+
+What a different face next met his view! The forehead was short, yet well
+set together; the nose small, but a little turned up at the end; and a
+draw-down at the sides of his mouth, proved that he had been a humourist,
+who minded the main chance, and could joke with his acquaintance, while
+he eagerly devoured a dainty which he was not to pay for. His lips shut
+like a box whose hinges had often been mended; and the muscles, which
+display the soft emotion of the heart on the cheeks, were grown quite
+rigid, so that, the vessels that should have moistened them not having
+much communication with the grand source of passions, the fine volatile
+fluid had evaporated, and they became mere dry fibres, which might be
+pulled by any misfortune that threatened himself, but were not
+sufficiently elastic to be moved by the miseries of others. His joints
+were inserted compactly, and with celerity they had performed all the
+animal functions, without any of the grace which results from the
+imagination mixing with the senses.
+
+A huge form was stretched near him, that exhibited marks of overgrown
+infancy; every part was relaxed; all appeared imperfect. Yet, some
+undulating lines on the puffed-out cheeks, displayed signs of timid,
+servile good nature; and the skin of the forehead had been so often drawn
+up by wonder, that the few hairs of the eyebrows were fixed in a sharp
+arch, whilst an ample chin rested in lobes of flesh on his protuberant
+breast.
+
+By his side was a body that had scarcely ever much life in it--sympathy
+seemed to have drawn them together--every feature and limb was round and
+fleshy, and, if a kind of brutal cunning had not marked the face, it
+might have been mistaken for an automaton, so unmixed was the phlegmatic
+fluid. The vital spark was buried deep in a soft mass of matter,
+resembling the pith in young elder, which, when found, is so equivocal,
+that it only appears a moister part of the same body.
+
+Another part of the beach was covered with sailors, whose bodies
+exhibited marks of strength and brutal courage.--Their characters were
+all different, though of the same class; Sagestus did not stay to
+discriminate them, satisfied with a rough sketch. He saw indolence roused
+by a love of humour, or rather bodily fun; sensuality and prodigality
+with a vein of generosity running through it; a contempt of danger with
+gross superstition; supine senses, only to be kept alive by noisy,
+tumultuous pleasures, or that kind of novelty which borders on absurdity:
+this formed the common outline, and the rest were rather dabs than
+shades.
+
+Sagestus paused, and remembered it had been said by an earthly wit, that
+"many a flower is born to blush unseen, and waste its sweetness on the
+desart air." How little, he exclaimed, did that poet know of the ways of
+heaven! And yet, in this respect, they are direct; the hands before me,
+were designed to pull a rope, knock down a sheep, or perform the servile
+offices of life; no "mute, inglorious poet" rests amongst them, and he
+who is superior to his fellow, does not rise above mediocrity. The genius
+that sprouts from a dunghil soon shakes off the heterogenous mass; those
+only grovel, who have not power to fly.
+
+He turned his step towards the mother of the orphan: another female was
+at some distance; and a man who, by his garb, might have been the
+husband, or brother, of the former, was not far off.
+
+Him the sage surveyed with an attentive eye, and bowed with respect to
+the inanimate clay, that lately had been the dwelling of a most
+benevolent spirit. The head was square, though the features were not very
+prominent; but there was a great harmony in every part, and the turn of
+the nostrils and lips evinced, that the soul must have had taste, to
+which they had served as organs. Penetration and judgment were seated on
+the brows that overhung the eye. Fixed as it was, Sagestus quickly
+discerned the expression it must have had; dark and pensive, rather from
+slowness of comprehension than melancholy, it seemed to absorb the light
+of knowledge, to drink it in ray by ray; nay, a new one was not allowed
+to enter his head till the last was arranged: an opinion was thus
+cautiously received, and maturely weighed, before it was added to the
+general stock. As nature led him to mount from a part to the whole, he
+was most conversant with the beautiful, and rarely comprehended the
+sublime; yet, said Sagestus, with a softened tone, he was all heart, full
+of forbearance, and desirous to please every fellow-creature; but from a
+nobler motive than a love of admiration; the fumes of vanity never
+mounted to cloud his brain, or tarnish his beneficence. The fluid in
+which those placid eyes swam, is now congealed; how often has tenderness
+given them the finest water! Some torn parts of the child's dress hung
+round his arm, which led the sage to conclude, that he had saved the
+child; every line in his face confirmed the conjecture; benevolence
+indeed strung the nerves that naturally were not very firm; it was the
+great knot that tied together the scattered qualities, and gave the
+distinct stamp to the character.
+
+The female whom he next approached, and supposed to be an attendant on
+the other, was below the middle size, and her legs were so
+disproportionably short, that, when she moved, she must have waddled
+along; her elbows were drawn in to touch her long taper, waist, and the
+air of her whole body was an affectation of gentility. Death could not
+alter the rigid hang of her limbs, or efface the simper that had
+stretched her mouth; the lips were thin, as if nature intended she should
+mince her words; her nose was small, and sharp at the end; and the
+forehead, unmarked by eyebrows, was wrinkled by the discontent that had
+sunk her cheeks, on which Sagestus still discerned faint traces of
+tenderness; and fierce good-nature, he perceived had sometimes animated
+the little spark of an eye that anger had oftener lighted. The same
+thought occurred to him that the sight of the sailors had suggested, Men
+and women are all in their proper places--this female was intended to
+fold up linen and nurse the sick.
+
+Anxious to observe the mother of his charge, he turned to the lily that
+had been so rudely snapped, and, carefully observing it, traced every
+fine line to its source. There was a delicacy in her form, so truly
+feminine, that an involuntary desire to cherish such a being, made the
+sage again feel the almost forgotten sensations of his nature. On
+observing her more closely, he discovered that her natural delicacy had
+been increased by an improper education, to a degree that took away all
+vigour from her faculties. And its baneful influence had had such an
+effect on her mind, that few traces of the exertions of it appeared on
+her face, though the fine finish of her features, and particularly the
+form of the forehead, convinced the sage that her understanding might
+have risen considerably above mediocrity, had the wheels ever been put in
+motion; but, clogged by prejudices, they never turned quite round, and,
+whenever she considered a subject, she stopped before she came to a
+conclusion. Assuming a mask of propriety, she had banished nature; yet
+its tendency was only to be diverted, not stifled. Some lines, which took
+from the symmetry of the mouth, not very obvious to a superficial
+observer, struck Sagestus, and they appeared to him characters of
+indolent obstinacy. Not having courage to form an opinion of her own, she
+adhered, with blind partiality, to those she adopted, which she received
+in the lump, and, as they always remained unopened, of course she only
+saw the even gloss on the outside. Vestiges of anger were visible on her
+brow, and the sage concluded, that she had often been offended with, and
+indeed would scarcely make any allowance for, those who did not coincide
+with her in opinion, as things always appear self-evident that have never
+been examined; yet her very weakness gave a charming timidity to her
+countenance; goodness and tenderness pervaded every lineament, and melted
+in her dark blue eyes. The compassion that wanted activity, was sincere,
+though it only embellished her face, or produced casual acts of charity
+when a moderate alms could relieve present distress. Unacquainted with
+life, fictitious, unnatural distress drew the tears that were not shed
+for real misery. In its own shape, human wretchedness excites a little
+disgust in the mind that has indulged sickly refinement. Perhaps the
+sage gave way to a little conjecture in drawing the last conclusion; but
+his conjectures generally arose from distinct ideas, and a dawn of light
+allowed him to see a great way farther than common mortals.
+
+He was now convinced that the orphan was not very unfortunate in having
+lost such a mother. The parent that inspires fond affection without
+respect, is seldom an useful one; and they only are respectable, who
+consider right and wrong abstracted from local forms and accidental
+modifications.
+
+Determined to adopt the child, he named it after himself, Sagesta, and
+retired to the hut where the innocent slept, to think of the best method
+of educating this child, whom the angry deep had spared.
+
+[The last branch of the education of Sagesta, consisted of a variety of
+characters and stories presented to her in the Cave of Fancy, of which
+the following is a specimen.]
+
+
+
+
+CHAP.
+
+
+A FORM now approached that particularly struck and interested Sagesta.
+The sage, observing what passed in her mind, bade her ever trust to the
+first impression. In life, he continued, try to remember the effect the
+first appearance of a stranger has on your mind; and, in proportion to
+your sensibility, you may decide on the character. Intelligence glances
+from eyes that have the same pursuits, and a benevolent heart soon traces
+the marks of benevolence on the countenance of an unknown
+fellow-creature; and not only the countenance, but the gestures, the
+voice, loudly speak truth to the unprejudiced mind.
+
+Whenever a stranger advances towards you with a tripping step, receives
+you with broad smiles, and a profusion of compliments, and yet you find
+yourself embarrassed and unable to return the salutation with equal
+cordiality, be assured that such a person is affected, and endeavours to
+maintain a very good character in the eyes of the world, without really
+practising the social virtues which dress the face in looks of unfeigned
+complacency. Kindred minds are drawn to each other by expressions which
+elude description; and, like the calm breeze that plays on a smooth lake,
+they are rather felt than seen. Beware of a man who always appears in
+good humour; a selfish design too frequently lurks in the smiles the
+heart never curved; or there is an affectation of candour that destroys
+all strength of character, by blending truth and falshood into an
+unmeaning mass. The mouth, in fact, seems to be the feature where you may
+trace every kind of dissimulation, from the simper of vanity, to the
+fixed smile of the designing villain. Perhaps, the modulations of the
+voice will still more quickly give a key to the character than even the
+turns of the mouth, or the words that issue from it; often do the tones
+of unpractised dissemblers give the lie to their assertions. Many people
+never speak in an unnatural voice, but when they are insincere: the
+phrases not corresponding with the dictates of the heart, have nothing to
+keep them in tune. In the course of an argument however, you may easily
+discover whether vanity or conviction stimulates the disputant, though
+his inflated countenance may be turned from you, and you may not see the
+gestures which mark self-sufficiency. He stopped, and the spirit began.
+
+I have wandered through the cave; and, as soon as I have taught you a
+useful lesson, I shall take my flight where my tears will cease to flow,
+and where mine eyes will no more be shocked with the sight of guilt and
+sorrow. Before many moons have changed, thou wilt enter, O mortal! into
+that world I have lately left. Listen to my warning voice, and trust not
+too much to the goodness which I perceive resides in thy breast. Let it
+be reined in by principles, lest thy very virtue sharpen the sting of
+remorse, which as naturally follows disorder in the moral world, as pain
+attends on intemperance in the physical. But my history will afford you
+more instruction than mere advice. Sagestus concurred in opinion with
+her, observing that the senses of children should be the first object of
+improvement; then their passions worked on; and judgment the fruit, must
+be the acquirement of the being itself, when out of leading-strings. The
+spirit bowed assent, and, without any further prelude, entered on her
+history.
+
+My mother was a most respectable character, but she was yoked to a man
+whose follies and vices made her ever feel the weight of her chains. The
+first sensation I recollect, was pity; for I have seen her weep over me
+and the rest of her babes, lamenting that the extravagance of a father
+would throw us destitute on the world. But, though my father was
+extravagant, and seldom thought of any thing but his own pleasures, our
+education was not neglected. In solitude, this employment was my mother's
+only solace; and my father's pride made him procure us masters; nay,
+sometimes he was so gratified by our improvement, that he would embrace
+us with tenderness, and intreat my mother to forgive him, with marks of
+real contrition. But the affection his penitence gave rise to, only
+served to expose her to continual disappointments, and keep hope alive
+merely to torment her. After a violent debauch he would let his beard
+grow, and the sadness that reigned in the house I shall never forget; he
+was ashamed to meet even the eyes of his children. This is so contrary to
+the nature of things, it gave me exquisite pain; I used, at those times,
+to show him extreme respect. I could not bear to see my parent humble
+himself before me. However neither his constitution, nor fortune could
+long bear the constant waste. He had, I have observed, a childish
+affection for his children, which was displayed in caresses that
+gratified him for the moment, yet never restrained the headlong fury of
+his appetites; his momentary repentance wrung his heart, without
+influencing his conduct; and he died, leaving an encumbered wreck of a
+good estate.
+
+As we had always lived in splendid poverty, rather than in affluence, the
+shock was not so great; and my mother repressed her anguish, and
+concealed some circumstances, that she might not shed a destructive
+mildew over the gaiety of youth.
+
+So fondly did I doat on this dear parent, that she engrossed all my
+tenderness; her sorrows had knit me firmly to her, and my chief care was
+to give her proofs of affection. The gallantry that afforded my
+companions, the few young people my mother forced me to mix with, so much
+pleasure, I despised; I wished more to be loved than admired, for I could
+love. I adored virtue; and my imagination, chasing a chimerical object,
+overlooked the common pleasures of life; they were not sufficient for my
+happiness. A latent fire made me burn to rise superior to my
+contemporaries in wisdom and virtue; and tears of joy and emulation
+filled my eyes when I read an account of a great action--I felt
+admiration, not astonishment.
+
+My mother had two particular friends, who endeavoured to settle her
+affairs; one was a middle-aged man, a merchant; the human breast never
+enshrined a more benevolent heart. His manners were rather rough, and he
+bluntly spoke his thoughts without observing the pain it gave; yet he
+possessed extreme tenderness, as far as his discernment went. Men do not
+make sufficient distinction, said she, digressing from her story to
+address Sagestus, between tenderness and sensibility.
+
+To give the shortest definition of sensibility, replied the sage, I
+should say that it is the result of acute senses, finely fashioned
+nerves, which vibrate at the slightest touch, and convey such clear
+intelligence to the brain, that it does not require to be arranged by the
+judgment. Such persons instantly enter into the characters of others, and
+instinctively discern what will give pain to every human being; their own
+feelings are so varied that they seem to contain in themselves, not only
+all the passions of the species, but their various modifications.
+Exquisite pain and pleasure is their portion; nature wears for them a
+different aspect than is displayed to common mortals. One moment it is a
+paradise; all is beautiful: a cloud arises, an emotion receives a sudden
+damp; darkness invades the sky, and the world is an unweeded garden;--but
+go on with your narrative, said Sagestus, recollecting himself.
+
+She proceeded. The man I am describing was humanity itself; but
+frequently he did not understand me; many of my feelings were not to be
+analyzed by his common sense. His friendships, for he had many friends,
+gave him pleasure unmixed with pain; his religion was coldly reasonable,
+because he wanted fancy, and he did not feel the necessity of finding,
+or creating, a perfect object, to answer the one engraved on his heart:
+the sketch there was faint. He went with the stream, and rather caught a
+character from the society he lived in, than spread one around him. In my
+mind many opinions were graven with a pen of brass, which he thought
+chimerical: but time could not erase them, and I now recognize them as
+the seeds of eternal happiness: they will soon expand in those realms
+where I shall enjoy the bliss adapted to my nature; this is all we need
+ask of the Supreme Being; happiness must follow the completion of his
+designs. He however could live quietly, without giving a preponderancy to
+many important opinions that continually obtruded on my mind; not having
+an enthusiastic affection for his fellow creatures, he did them good,
+without suffering from their follies. He was particularly attached to me,
+and I felt for him all the affection of a daughter; often, when he had
+been interesting himself to promote my welfare, have I lamented that he
+was not my father; lamented that the vices of mine had dried up one
+source of pure affection.
+
+The other friend I have already alluded to, was of a very different
+character; greatness of mind, and those combinations of feeling which are
+so difficult to describe, raised him above the throng, that bustle their
+hour out, lie down to sleep, and are forgotten. But I shall soon see him,
+she exclaimed, as much superior to his former self, as he then rose in my
+eyes above his fellow creatures! As she spoke, a glow of delight
+animated each feature; her countenance appeared transparent; and she
+silently anticipated the happiness she should enjoy, when she entered
+those mansions, where death-divided friends should meet, to part no more;
+where human weakness could not damp their bliss, or poison the cup of joy
+that, on earth, drops from the lips as soon as tasted, or, if some daring
+mortal snatches a hasty draught, what was sweet to the taste becomes a
+root of bitterness.
+
+He was unfortunate, had many cares to struggle with, and I marked on his
+cheeks traces of the same sorrows that sunk my own. He was unhappy I say,
+and perhaps pity might first have awoke my tenderness; for, early in
+life, an artful woman worked on his compassionate soul, and he united his
+fate to a being made up of such jarring elements, that he was still
+alone. The discovery did not extinguish that propensity to love, a high
+sense of virtue fed. I saw him sick and unhappy, without a friend to
+sooth the hours languor made heavy; often did I sit a long winter's
+evening by his side, railing at the swift wings of time, and terming my
+love, humanity.
+
+Two years passed in this manner, silently rooting my affection; and it
+might have continued calm, if a fever had not brought him to the very
+verge of the grave. Though still deceived, I was miserable that the
+customs of the world did not allow me to watch by him; when sleep forsook
+his pillow, my wearied eyes were not closed, and my anxious spirit
+hovered round his bed. I saw him, before he had recovered his strength;
+and, when his hand touched mine, life almost retired, or flew to meet
+the touch. The first look found a ready way to my heart, and thrilled
+through every vein. We were left alone, and insensibly began to talk of
+the immortality of the soul; I declared that I could not live without
+this conviction. In the ardour of conversation he pressed my hand to his
+heart; it rested there a moment, and my emotions gave weight to my
+opinion, for the affection we felt was not of a perishable nature.--A
+silence ensued, I know not how long; he then threw my hand from him, as
+if it had been a serpent; formally complained of the weather, and
+adverted to twenty other uninteresting subjects. Vain efforts! Our hearts
+had already spoken to each other.
+
+Feebly did I afterwards combat an affection, which seemed twisted in
+every fibre of my heart. The world stood still when I thought of him; it
+moved heavily at best, with one whose very constitution seemed to mark
+her out for misery. But I will not dwell on the passion I too fondly
+nursed. One only refuge had I on earth; I could not resolutely desolate
+the scene my fancy flew to, when worldly cares, when a knowledge of
+mankind, which my circumstances forced on me, rendered every other
+insipid. I was afraid of the unmarked vacuity of common life; yet, though
+I supinely indulged myself in fairy-land, when I ought to have been more
+actively employed, virtue was still the first mover of my actions; she
+dressed my love in such enchanting colours, and spread the net I could
+never break. Our corresponding feelings confounded our very souls; and
+in many conversations we almost intuitively discerned each other's
+sentiments; the heart opened itself, not chilled by reserve, nor afraid
+of misconstruction. But, if virtue inspired love, love gave new energy to
+virtue, and absorbed every selfish passion. Never did even a wish escape
+me, that my lover should not fulfil the hard duties which fate had
+imposed on him. I only dissembled with him in one particular; I
+endeavoured to soften his wife's too conspicuous follies, and extenuated
+her failings in an indirect manner. To this I was prompted by a loftiness
+of spirit; I should have broken the band of life, had I ceased to respect
+myself. But I will hasten to an important change in my circumstances.
+
+My mother, who had concealed the real state of her affairs from me, was
+now impelled to make me her confident, that I might assist to discharge
+her mighty debt of gratitude. The merchant, my more than father, had
+privately assisted her: but a fatal civil-war reduced his large property
+to a bare competency; and an inflammation in his eyes, that arose from a
+cold he had caught at a wreck, which he watched during a stormy night to
+keep off the lawless colliers, almost deprived him of sight. His life had
+been spent in society, and he scarcely knew how to fill the void; for his
+spirit would not allow him to mix with his former equals as an humble
+companion; he who had been treated with uncommon respect, could not brook
+their insulting pity. From the resource of solitude, reading, the
+complaint in his eyes cut him off, and he became our constant visitor.
+
+Actuated by the sincerest affection, I used to read to him, and he
+mistook my tenderness for love. How could I undeceive him, when every
+circumstance frowned on him! Too soon I found that I was his only
+comfort; I, who rejected his hand when fortune smiled, could not now
+second her blow; and, in a moment of enthusiastic gratitude and tender
+compassion, I offered him my hand.--It was received with pleasure;
+transport was not made for his soul; nor did he discover that nature had
+separated us, by making me alive to such different sensations. My mother
+was to live with us, and I dwelt on this circumstance to banish cruel
+recollections, when the bent bow returned to its former state.
+
+With a bursting heart and a firm voice, I named the day when I was to
+seal my promise. It came, in spite of my regret; I had been previously
+preparing myself for the awful ceremony, and answered the solemn question
+with a resolute tone, that would silence the dictates of my heart; it was
+a forced, unvaried one; had nature modulated it, my secret would have
+escaped. My active spirit was painfully on the watch to repress every
+tender emotion. The joy in my venerable parent's countenance, the
+tenderness of my husband, as he conducted me home, for I really had a
+sincere affection for him, the gratulations of my mind, when I thought
+that this sacrifice was heroic, all tended to deceive me; but the joy of
+victory over the resigned, pallid look of my lover, haunted my
+imagination, and fixed itself in the centre of my brain.--Still I
+imagined, that his spirit was near me, that he only felt sorrow for my
+loss, and without complaint resigned me to my duty.
+
+I was left alone a moment; my two elbows rested on a table to support my
+chin. Ten thousand thoughts darted with astonishing velocity through my
+mind. My eyes were dry; I was on the brink of madness. At this moment a
+strange association was made by my imagination; I thought of Gallileo,
+who when he left the inquisition, looked upwards, and cried out, "Yet it
+moves." A shower of tears, like the refreshing drops of heaven, relieved
+my parched sockets; they fell disregarded on the table; and, stamping
+with my foot, in an agony I exclaimed, "Yet I love." My husband entered
+before I had calmed these tumultuous emotions, and tenderly took my
+hand. I snatched it from him; grief and surprise were marked on his
+countenance; I hastily stretched it out again. My heart smote me, and I
+removed the transient mist by an unfeigned endeavour to please him.
+
+A few months after, my mind grew calmer; and, if a treacherous
+imagination, if feelings many accidents revived, sometimes plunged me
+into melancholy, I often repeated with steady conviction, that virtue was
+not an empty name, and that, in following the dictates of duty, I had not
+bidden adieu to content.
+
+In the course of a few years, the dear object of my fondest affection,
+said farewel, in dying accents. Thus left alone, my grief became dear;
+and I did not feel solitary, because I thought I might, without a crime,
+indulge a passion, that grew more ardent than ever when my imagination
+only presented him to my view, and restored my former activity of soul
+which the late calm had rendered torpid. I seemed to find myself again,
+to find the eccentric warmth that gave me identity of character. Reason
+had governed my conduct, but could not change my nature; this voluptuous
+sorrow was superior to every gratification of sense, and death more
+firmly united our hearts.
+
+Alive to every human affection, I smoothed my mothers passage to
+eternity, and so often gave my husband sincere proofs of affection, he
+never supposed that I was actuated by a more fervent attachment. My
+melancholy, my uneven spirits, he attributed to my extreme sensibility,
+and loved me the better for possessing qualities he could not
+comprehend.
+
+At the close of a summer's day, some years after, I wandered with
+careless steps over a pathless common; various anxieties had rendered the
+hours which the sun had enlightened heavy; sober evening came on; I
+wished to still "my mind, and woo lone quiet in her silent walk." The
+scene accorded with my feelings; it was wild and grand; and the spreading
+twilight had almost confounded the distant sea with the barren, blue
+hills that melted from my sight. I sat down on a rising ground; the rays
+of the departing sun illumined the horizon, but so indistinctly, that I
+anticipated their total extinction. The death of Nature led me to a still
+more interesting subject, that came home to my bosom, the death of him I
+loved. A village-bell was tolling; I listened, and thought of the moment
+when I heard his interrupted breath, and felt the agonizing fear, that
+the same sound would never more reach my ears, and that the intelligence
+glanced from my eyes, would no more be felt. The spoiler had seized his
+prey; the sun was fled, what was this world to me! I wandered to another,
+where death and darkness could not enter; I pursued the sun beyond the
+mountains, and the soul escaped from this vale of tears. My reflections
+were tinged with melancholy, but they were sublime.--I grasped a mighty
+whole, and smiled on the king of terrors; the tie which bound me to my
+friends he could not break; the same mysterious knot united me to the
+source of all goodness and happiness. I had seen the divinity reflected
+in a face I loved; I had read immortal characters displayed on a human
+countenance, and forgot myself whilst I gazed. I could not think of
+immortality, without recollecting the ecstacy I felt, when my heart first
+whispered to me that I was beloved; and again did I feel the sacred tie
+of mutual affection; fervently I prayed to the father of mercies; and
+rejoiced that he could see every turn of a heart, whose movements I could
+not perfectly understand. My passion seemed a pledge of immortality; I
+did not wish to hide it from the all-searching eye of heaven. Where
+indeed could I go from his presence? and, whilst it was dear to me,
+though darkness might reign during the night of life, joy would come when
+I awoke to life everlasting.
+
+I now turned my step towards home, when the appearance of a girl, who
+stood weeping on the common, attracted my attention. I accosted her, and
+soon heard her simple tale; that her father was gone to sea, and her
+mother sick in bed. I followed her to their little dwelling, and relieved
+the sick wretch. I then again sought my own abode; but death did not now
+haunt my fancy. Contriving to give the poor creature I had left more
+effectual relief, I reached my own garden-gate very weary, and rested on
+it.--Recollecting the turns of my mind during the walk, I exclaimed,
+Surely life may thus be enlivened by active benevolence, and the sleep of
+death, like that I am now disposed to fall into, may be sweet!
+
+My life was now unmarked by any extraordinary change, and a few days ago
+I entered this cavern; for through it every mortal must pass; and here I
+have discovered, that I neglected many opportunities of being useful,
+whilst I fostered a devouring flame. Remorse has not reached me, because
+I firmly adhered to my principles, and I have also discovered that I saw
+through a false medium. Worthy as the mortal was I adored, I should not
+long have loved him with the ardour I did, had fate united us, and broken
+the delusion the imagination so artfully wove. His virtues, as they now
+do, would have extorted my esteem; but he who formed the human soul, only
+can fill it, and the chief happiness of an immortal being must arise from
+the same source as its existence. Earthly love leads to heavenly, and
+prepares us for a more exalted state; if it does not change its nature,
+and destroy itself, by trampling on the virtue, that constitutes its
+essence, and allies us to the Deity.
+
+
+
+
+ON
+
+POETRY,
+
+AND
+
+OUR RELISH FOR THE BEAUTIES OF NATURE.
+
+
+ON
+
+POETRY, &c.
+
+
+A TASTE for rural scenes, in the present state of society, appears to be
+very often an artificial sentiment, rather inspired by poetry and
+romances, than a real perception of the beauties of nature. But, as it is
+reckoned a proof of refined taste to praise the calm pleasures which the
+country affords, the theme is never exhausted. Yet it may be made a
+question, whether this romantic kind of declamation, has much effect on
+the conduct of those, who leave, for a season, the crowded cities in
+which they were bred.
+
+I have been led to these reflections, by observing, when I have resided
+for any length of time in the country, how few people seem to contemplate
+nature with their own eyes. I have "brushed the dew away" in the morning;
+but, pacing over the printless grass, I have wondered that, in such
+delightful situations, the sun was allowed to rise in solitary majesty,
+whilst my eyes alone hailed its beautifying beams. The webs of the
+evening have still been spread across the hedged path, unless some
+labouring man, trudging to work, disturbed the fairy structure; yet, in
+spite of this supineness, when I joined the social circle, every tongue
+rang changes on the pleasures of the country.
+
+Having frequently had occasion to make the same observation, I was led to
+endeavour, in one of my solitary rambles, to trace the cause, and
+likewise to enquire why the poetry written in the infancy of society, is
+most natural: which, strictly speaking (for _natural_ is a very
+indefinite expression) is merely to say, that it is the transcript of
+immediate sensations, in all their native wildness and simplicity, when
+fancy, awakened by the sight of interesting objects, was most actively at
+work. At such moments, sensibility quickly furnishes similes, and the
+sublimated spirits combine images, which rising spontaneously, it is not
+necessary coldly to ransack the understanding or memory, till the
+laborious efforts of judgment exclude present sensations, and damp the
+fire of enthusiasm.
+
+The effusions of a vigorous mind, will ever tell us how far the
+understanding has been enlarged by thought, and stored with knowledge.
+The richness of the soil even appears on the surface; and the result of
+profound thinking, often mixing, with playful grace, in the reveries of
+the poet, smoothly incorporates with the ebullitions of animal spirits,
+when the finely fashioned nerve vibrates acutely with rapture, or when,
+relaxed by soft melancholy, a pleasing languor prompts the long-drawn
+sigh, and feeds the slowly falling tear.
+
+The poet, the man of strong feelings, gives us only an image of his mind,
+when he was actually alone, conversing with himself, and marking the
+impression which nature had made on his own heart.--If, at this sacred
+moment, the idea of some departed friend, some tender recollection when
+the soul was most alive to tenderness, intruded unawares into his
+thoughts, the sorrow which it produced is artlessly, yet poetically
+expressed--and who can avoid sympathizing?
+
+Love to man leads to devotion--grand and sublime images strike the
+imagination--God is seen in every floating cloud, and comes from the
+misty mountain to receive the noblest homage of an intelligent
+creature--praise. How solemn is the moment, when all affections and
+remembrances fade before the sublime admiration which the wisdom and
+goodness of God inspires, when he is worshipped in a _temple not made
+with hands_, and the world seems to contain only the mind that formed,
+and the mind that contemplates it! These are not the weak responses of
+ceremonial devotion; nor, to express them, would the poet need another
+poet's aid: his heart burns within him, and he speaks the language of
+truth and nature with resistless energy.
+
+Inequalities, of course, are observable in his effusions; and a less
+vigorous fancy, with more taste, would have produced more elegance and
+uniformity; but, as passages are softened or expunged during the cooler
+moments of reflection, the understanding is gratified at the expence of
+those involuntary sensations, which, like the beauteous tints of an
+evening sky, are so evanescent, that they melt into new forms before they
+can be analyzed. For however eloquently we may boast of our reason, man
+must often be delighted he cannot tell why, or his blunt feelings are not
+made to relish the beauties which nature, poetry, or any of the imitative
+arts, afford.
+
+The imagery of the ancients seems naturally to have been borrowed from
+surrounding objects and their mythology. When a hero is to be transported
+from one place to another, across pathless wastes, is any vehicle so
+natural, as one of the fleecy clouds on which the poet has often gazed,
+scarcely conscious that he wished to make it his chariot? Again, when
+nature seems to present obstacles to his progress at almost every step,
+when the tangled forest and steep mountain stand as barriers, to pass
+over which the mind longs for supernatural aid; an interposing deity, who
+walks on the waves, and rules the storm, severely felt in the first
+attempts to cultivate a country, will receive from the impassioned fancy
+"a local habitation and a name."
+
+It would be a philosophical enquiry, and throw some light on the history
+of the human mind, to trace, as far as our information will allow us to
+trace, the spontaneous feelings and ideas which have produced the images
+that now frequently appear unnatural, because they are remote; and
+disgusting, because they have been servilely copied by poets, whose
+habits of thinking, and views of nature must have been different; for,
+though the understanding seldom disturbs the current of our present
+feelings, without dissipating the gay clouds which fancy has been
+embracing, yet it silently gives the colour to the whole tenour of them,
+and the dream is over, when truth is grossly violated, or images
+introduced, selected from books, and not from local manners or popular
+prejudices.
+
+In a more advanced state of civilization, a poet is rather the creature
+of art, than of nature. The books that he reads in his youth, become a
+hot-bed in which artificial fruits are produced, beautiful to the common
+eye, though they want the true hue and flavour. His images do not arise
+from sensations; they are copies; and, like the works of the painters who
+copy ancient statues when they draw men and women of their own times, we
+acknowledge that the features are fine, and the proportions just; yet
+they are men of stone; insipid figures, that never convey to the mind the
+idea of a portrait taken from life, where the soul gives spirit and
+homogeneity to the whole. The silken wings of fancy are shrivelled by
+rules; and a desire of attaining elegance of diction, occasions an
+attention to words, incompatible with sublime, impassioned thoughts.
+
+A boy of abilities, who has been taught the structure of verse at school,
+and been roused by emulation to compose rhymes whilst he was reading
+works of genius, may, by practice, produce pretty verses, and even become
+what is often termed an elegant poet: yet his readers, without knowing
+what to find fault with, do not find themselves warmly interested. In the
+works of the poets who fasten on their affections, they see grosser
+faults, and the very images which shock their taste in the modern; still
+they do not appear as puerile or extrinsic in one as the
+other.--Why?--because they did not appear so to the author.
+
+It may sound paradoxical, after observing that those productions want
+vigour, that are merely the work of imitation, in which the understanding
+has violently directed, if not extinguished, the blaze of fancy, to
+assert, that, though genius be only another word for exquisite
+sensibility, the first observers of nature, the true poets, exercised
+their understanding much more than their imitators. But they exercised it
+to discriminate things, whilst their followers were busy to borrow
+sentiments and arrange words.
+
+Boys who have received a classical education, load their memory with
+words, and the correspondent ideas are perhaps never distinctly
+comprehended. As a proof of this assertion, I must observe, that I have
+known many young people who could write tolerably smooth verses, and
+string epithets prettily together, when their prose themes showed the
+barrenness of their minds, and how superficial the cultivation must have
+been, which their understanding had received.
+
+Dr. Johnson, I know, has given a definition of genius, which would
+overturn my reasoning, if I were to admit it.--He imagines, that _a
+strong mind, accidentally led to some particular study_ in which it
+excels, is a genius.--Not to stop to investigate the causes which
+produced this happy _strength_ of mind, experience seems to prove, that
+those minds have appeared most vigorous, that have pursued a study, after
+nature had discovered a bent; for it would be absurd to suppose, that a
+slight impression made on the weak faculties of a boy, is the fiat of
+fate, and not to be effaced by any succeeding impression, or unexpected
+difficulty. Dr. Johnson in fact, appears sometimes to be of the same
+opinion (how consistently I shall not now enquire), especially when he
+observes, "that Thomson looked on nature with the eye which she only
+gives to a poet."
+
+But, though it should be allowed that books may produce some poets, I
+fear they will never be the poets who charm our cares to sleep, or extort
+admiration. They may diffuse taste, and polish the language; but I am
+inclined to conclude that they will seldom rouse the passions, or amend
+the heart.
+
+And, to return to the first subject of discussion, the reason why most
+people are more interested by a scene described by a poet, than by a
+view of nature, probably arises from the want of a lively imagination.
+The poet contracts the prospect, and, selecting the most picturesque part
+in his _camera_, the judgment is directed, and the whole force of the
+languid faculty turned towards the objects which excited the most
+forcible emotions in the poet's heart; the reader consequently feels the
+enlivened description, though he was not able to receive a first
+impression from the operations of his own mind.
+
+Besides, it may be further observed, that gross minds are only to be
+moved by forcible representations. To rouse the thoughtless, objects must
+be presented, calculated to produce tumultuous emotions; the
+unsubstantial, picturesque forms which a contemplative man gazes on, and
+often follows with ardour till he is mocked by a glimpse of unattainable
+excellence, appear to them the light vapours of a dreaming enthusiast,
+who gives up the substance for the shadow. It is not within that they
+seek amusement; their eyes are seldom turned on themselves; consequently
+their emotions, though sometimes fervid, are always transient, and the
+nicer perceptions which distinguish the man of genuine taste, are not
+felt, or make such a slight impression as scarcely to excite any
+pleasurable sensations. Is it surprising then that they are often
+overlooked, even by those who are delighted by the same images
+concentrated by the poet?
+
+But even this numerous class is exceeded, by witlings, who, anxious to
+appear to have wit and taste, do not allow their understandings or
+feelings any liberty; for, instead of cultivating their faculties and
+reflecting on their operations, they are busy collecting prejudices; and
+are predetermined to admire what the suffrage of time announces as
+excellent, not to store up a fund of amusement for themselves, but to
+enable them to talk.
+
+These hints will assist the reader to trace some of the causes why the
+beauties of nature are not forcibly felt, when civilization, or rather
+luxury, has made considerable advances--those calm sensations are not
+sufficiently lively to serve as a relaxation to the voluptuary, or even
+to the moderate pursuer of artificial pleasures. In the present state of
+society, the understanding must bring back the feelings to nature, or the
+sensibility must have such native strength, as rather to be whetted than
+destroyed by the strong exercises of passion.
+
+That the most valuable things are liable to the greatest perversion, is
+however as trite as true:--for the same sensibility, or quickness of
+senses, which makes a man relish the tranquil scenes of nature, when
+sensation, rather than reason, imparts delight, frequently makes a
+libertine of him, by leading him to prefer the sensual tumult of love a
+little refined by sentiment, to the calm pleasures of affectionate
+friendship, in whose sober satisfactions, reason, mixing her
+tranquillizing convictions, whispers, that content, not happiness, is the
+reward of virtue in this world.
+
+
+
+
+HINTS.
+
+[_Chiefly designed to have been incorporated in the Second Part of the_
+Vindication of the Rights of Woman.]
+
+
+HINTS.
+
+
+1.
+
+INDOLENCE is the source of nervous complaints, and a whole host of cares.
+This devil might say that his name was legion.
+
+
+2.
+
+It should be one of the employments of women of fortune, to visit
+hospitals, and superintend the conduct of inferiors.
+
+
+3.
+
+It is generally supposed, that the imagination of women is particularly
+active, and leads them astray. Why then do we seek by education only to
+exercise their imagination and feeling, till the understanding, grown
+rigid by disuse, is unable to exercise itself--and the superfluous
+nourishment the imagination and feeling have received, renders the former
+romantic, and the latter weak?
+
+
+4.
+
+Few men have risen to any great eminence in learning, who have not
+received something like a regular education. Why are women expected to
+surmount difficulties that men are not equal to?
+
+
+5.
+
+Nothing can be more absurd than the ridicule of the critic, that the
+heroine of his mock-tragedy was in love with the very man whom she ought
+least to have loved; he could not have given a better reason. How can
+passion gain strength any other way? In Otaheite, love cannot be known,
+where the obstacles to irritate an indiscriminate appetite, and sublimate
+the simple sensations of desire till they mount to passion, are never
+known. There a man or woman cannot love the very person they ought not to
+have loved--nor does jealousy ever fan the flame.
+
+
+6.
+
+It has frequently been observed, that, when women have an object in view,
+they pursue it with more steadiness than men, particularly love. This is
+not a compliment. Passion pursues with more heat than reason, and with
+most ardour during the absence of reason.
+
+
+7.
+
+Men are more subject to the physical love than women. The confined
+education of women makes them more subject to jealousy.
+
+
+8.
+
+Simplicity seems, in general, the consequence of ignorance, as I have
+observed in the characters of women and sailors--the being confined to
+one track of impressions.
+
+
+9.
+
+I know of no other way of preserving the chastity of mankind, than that
+of rendering women rather objects of love than desire. The difference is
+great. Yet, while women are encouraged to ornament their persons at the
+expence of their minds, while indolence renders them helpless and
+lascivious (for what other name can be given to the common intercourse
+between the sexes?) they will be, generally speaking, only objects of
+desire; and, to such women, men cannot be constant. Men, accustomed only
+to have their senses moved, merely seek for a selfish gratification in
+the society of women, and their sexual instinct, being neither supported
+by the understanding nor the heart, must be excited by variety.
+
+
+10.
+
+We ought to respect old opinions; though prejudices, blindly adopted,
+lead to error, and preclude all exercise of the reason.
+
+The emulation which often makes a boy mischievous, is a generous spur;
+and the old remark, that unlucky, turbulent boys, make the wisest and
+best men, is true, spite of Mr. Knox's arguments. It has been observed,
+that the most adventurous horses, when tamed or domesticated, are the
+most mild and tractable.
+
+
+11.
+
+The children who start up suddenly at twelve or fourteen, and fall into
+decays, in consequence, as it is termed, of outgrowing their strength,
+are in general, I believe, those children, who have been bred up with
+mistaken tenderness, and not allowed to sport and take exercise in the
+open air. This is analogous to plants: for it is found that they run up
+sickly, long stalks, when confined.
+
+
+12.
+
+Children should be taught to feel deference, not to practise submission.
+
+
+13.
+
+It is always a proof of false refinement, when a fastidious taste
+overpowers sympathy.
+
+
+14.
+
+Lust appears to be the most natural companion of wild ambition; and love
+of human praise, of that dominion erected by cunning.
+
+
+15.
+
+"Genius decays as judgment increases." Of course, those who have the
+least genius, have the earliest appearance of wisdom.
+
+
+16.
+
+A knowledge of the fine arts, is seldom subservient to the promotion of
+either religion or virtue. Elegance is often indecency; witness our
+prints.
+
+
+17.
+
+There does not appear to be any evil in the world, but what is necessary.
+The doctrine of rewards and punishments, not considered as a means of
+reformation, appears to me an infamous libel on divine goodness.
+
+
+18.
+
+Whether virtue is founded on reason or revelation, virtue is wisdom, and
+vice is folly. Why are positive punishments?
+
+
+19.
+
+Few can walk alone. The staff of Christianity is the necessary support of
+human weakness. But an acquaintance with the nature of man and virtue,
+with just sentiments on the attributes, would be sufficient, without a
+voice from heaven, to lead some to virtue, but not the mob.
+
+
+20.
+
+I only expect the natural reward of virtue, whatever it may be. I rely
+not on a positive reward.
+
+The justice of God can be vindicated by a belief in a future state--but
+a continuation of being vindicates it as clearly, as the positive system
+of rewards and punishments--by evil educing good for the individual, and
+not for an imaginary whole. The happiness of the whole must arise from
+the happiness of the constituent parts, or this world is not a state of
+trial, but a school.
+
+
+21.
+
+The vices acquired by Augustus to retain his power, must have tainted his
+soul, and prevented that increase of happiness a good man expects in the
+next stage of existence. This was a natural punishment.
+
+
+22.
+
+The lover is ever most deeply enamoured, when it is with he knows not
+what--and the devotion of a mystic has a rude Gothic grandeur in it,
+which the respectful adoration of a philosopher will never reach. I may
+be thought fanciful; but it has continually occurred to me, that, though,
+I allow, reason in this world is the mother of wisdom--yet some flights
+of the imagination seem to reach what wisdom cannot teach--and, while
+they delude us here, afford a glorious hope, if not a foretaste, of what
+we may expect hereafter. He that created us, did not mean to mark us with
+ideal images of grandeur, the _baseless fabric of a vision_--No--that
+perfection we follow with hopeless ardour when the whisperings of reason
+are heard, may be found, when not incompatible with our state, in the
+round of eternity. Perfection indeed must, even then, be a comparative
+idea--but the wisdom, the happiness of a superior state, has been
+supposed to be intuitive, and the happiest effusions of human genius have
+seemed like inspiration--the deductions of reason destroy sublimity.
+
+
+23.
+
+I am more and more convinced, that poetry is the first effervescence of
+the imagination, and the forerunner of civilization.
+
+
+24.
+
+When the Arabs had no trace of literature or science, they composed
+beautiful verses on the subjects of love and war. The flights of the
+imagination, and the laboured deductions of reason, appear almost
+incompatible.
+
+
+25.
+
+Poetry certainly flourishes most in the first rude state of society. The
+passions speak most eloquently, when they are not shackled by reason.
+The sublime expression, which has been so often quoted, [Genesis, ch. 1,
+ver. 3.] is perhaps a barbarous flight; or rather the grand conception of
+an uncultivated mind; for it is contrary to nature and experience, to
+suppose that this account is founded on facts--It is doubtless a sublime
+allegory. But a cultivated mind would not thus have described the
+creation--for, arguing from analogy, it appears that creation must have
+been a comprehensive plan, and that the Supreme Being always uses second
+causes, slowly and silently to fulfil his purpose. This is, in reality, a
+more sublime view of that power which wisdom supports: but it is not the
+sublimity that would strike the impassioned mind, in which the
+imagination took place of intellect. Tell a being, whose affections and
+passions have been more exercised than his reason, that God said, _Let
+there be light! and there was light_; and he would prostrate himself
+before the Being who could thus call things out of nothing, as if they
+were: but a man in whom reason had taken place of passion, would not
+adore, till wisdom was conspicuous as well as power, for his admiration
+must be founded on principle.
+
+
+26.
+
+Individuality is ever conspicuous in those enthusiastic flights of fancy,
+in which reason is left behind, without being lost sight of.
+
+
+27.
+
+The mind has been too often brought to the test of enquiries which only
+reach to matter--put into the crucible, though the magnetic and electric
+fluid escapes from the experimental philosopher.
+
+
+28.
+
+Mr. Kant has observed, that the understanding is sublime, the imagination
+beautiful--yet it is evident, that poets, and men who undoubtedly possess
+the liveliest imagination, are most touched by the sublime, while men who
+have cold, enquiring minds, have not this exquisite feeling in any great
+degree, and indeed seem to lose it as they cultivate their reason.
+
+
+29.
+
+The Grecian buildings are graceful--they fill the mind with all those
+pleasing emotions, which elegance and beauty never fail to excite in a
+cultivated mind--utility and grace strike us in unison--the mind is
+satisfied--things appear just what they ought to be: a calm satisfaction
+is felt, but the imagination has nothing to do--no obscurity darkens the
+gloom--like reasonable content, we can say why we are pleased--and this
+kind of pleasure may be lasting, but it is never great.
+
+
+30.
+
+When we say that a person is an original, it is only to say in other
+words that he thinks. "The less a man has cultivated his rational
+faculties, the more powerful is the principle of imitation, over his
+actions, and his habits of thinking. Most women, of course, are more
+influenced by the behaviour, the fashions, and the opinions of those with
+whom they associate, than men." (Smellie.)
+
+When we read a book which supports our favourite opinions, how eagerly do
+we suck in the doctrines, and suffer our minds placidly to reflect the
+images which illustrate the tenets we have embraced? We indolently or
+quietly acquiesce in the conclusion, and our spirit animates and connects
+the various subjects. But, on the contrary, when we peruse a skilful
+writer, who does not coincide in opinion with us, how is the mind on the
+watch to detect fallacy? And this coolness often prevents our being
+carried away by a stream of eloquence, which the prejudiced mind terms
+declamation--a pomp of words.--We never allow ourselves to be warmed;
+and, after contending with the writer, are more confirmed in our own
+opinion, as much perhaps from a spirit of contradiction as from
+reason.--Such is the strength of man!
+
+
+31.
+
+It is the individual manner of seeing and feeling, pourtrayed by a strong
+imagination in bold images that have struck the senses, which creates
+all the charms of poetry. A great reader is always quoting the
+description of another's emotions; a strong imagination delights to paint
+its own. A writer of genius makes us feel; an inferior author reason.
+
+
+32.
+
+Some principle prior to self-love must have existed: the feeling which
+produced the pleasure, must have existed before the experience.
+
+
+THE END.
+
+
+Transcriber's Notes:
+
+1. Obvious punctuation errors repaired.
+
+2. This text contains blank space and lines of "--" and "*" characters.
+These are replicated from the printed pages, presumably they indicate
+censored text from the original source.
+
+3. The listed errata at the beginning of Volume 1 and Volume 4 have been
+applied to the text.
+
+4. The text as printed used incipits and 'long s' font. The incipits have
+not been replicated in this version, but can be viewed on 'long s' HTML
+version of the text or the page images linked from the HTML versions.
+
+5. Corrections:
+Volume 1, Page 33, "accuteness" changed to "acuteness"
+Volume 1, Page 51, "unfortutunate" changed to "unfortunate"
+Volume 1, Page 57, "resource" changed to "recourse"
+Volume 1, Page 90, "hunted" changed to "shunted"
+Volume 1, Page 103, "carreer" changed to "career"
+Volume 1, Page 161, "plased" changed to "pleased"
+Volume 2, Page 116, "and and" changed to "and"
+Volume 3, Page 35, "a r" changed to "air"
+Volume 3, Page 81, "he he" changed to "he"
+Volume 3, Page 120, "explananations" changed to "explanations"
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Posthumous Works, by Mary Wollstonecraft
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